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shouta-aizawow · 3 days ago

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ORV Novel Spoilers (kinda)

Kdj’s relationship with lsk and the whole theme about how a person is made up of the stories everyone has of them and how one person only has their narrow view and can’t fully understand another person is so tragic to me, bc the book lsk wrote and her lack of communication when she was in jail contributed so much to the way kdj was treated and felt growing up, and it wasn’t helped at all by her treating him like a child and keeping information away from him about her intentions during the scenarios.

So like she’s this “big bad” in his life and her actions pretty much define him, but throughout the novel her allies and ysh and hsy get this completely different experience with her that’s way more sympathetic and understandable, and it’s like what is it about kdj that makes him experience all of this tragedy because of her when everyone else has experiences that are so much better with her?

And not only that but the realization that all of that suffering, the way that that part of her is such a huge part of his life, is such a small facet of her entire being that when he’s helping repair her stories, his contribution isn’t actually enough. (That scene probably hit me the hardest when it comes to both of them)

It’s like all of the bad is reserved for him and she’s so unwilling to give him any more, yet she still sorta mocks him (idk a better word) for not knowing more. She’s keeping him ignorant, letting him stew in his resentment and sadness, and using that to justify treating him like a child she’s not letting grow up by keeping the truth from him. It’s like she’s punishing herself by not telling the truth and letting him feel this way about her but by doing that she’s punishing him by not telling the truth when all he wants to know is why she did all that and if he truly had no one else and nothing other than TWSA keeping him alive.

He understands her better by the end of the novel but idk I just feel so sad for him

#orv novel spoilers #orv spoilers #kinda #Is this coherent #Yes I get that the large reason why his experience with her is different if bc of his dad and that whole mess #but still #It’s so weird like if I think about each action she took before the scenarios I can’t say she’s bad #She’s not a bad person even after #But oughhh she makes me uncomfortable #Kdj realizing his poor treatment from her doesn’t make up the entirety of who she is Hits close to home #LIKE UGH #I want to shake her and be like WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS #Poor kdj he makes me so sad #kim dokja #lee sookyung #I don’t think reconciliation beyond what’s in the novel #could really work for them #she’s been out of his life for too long and her being in his life #only caused mental anguish #this sorta peaceful but not really middle ground is the best it could get imo

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