#this shit suuucks

[quartergremlin]

new stuff wrong with my computer: apparently a vertical section of the touchscreen just. sometimes possesses itself and wigs out.

turning it off and back off again fixed it for like. two minutes, it did it again for a second, and them calmed down.

[sproutlett]

how do i see my own blog with this update ????

[sweetbunanarchy]

“Obsessing over a character helps you improve your art actually!” *Me, every time I try to draw Jack*:

[lady-grace-pens]

Nightmares are the ✨wooooorst ✨

[dreamgirleviil]

period so bad I know what remus lupin feels like during the full moon

[bratzboykai]

My period is being so mean to me and I'm tired :(

[plaguethewaters]

scuffed notes cbee.kiss

[collaredbottom]

you're an archeogist. Youre digging in an extremely overgrown area, plants wrapping around large, dull, cracked pillars that stretch into the sky at odd angles. Animals love the place too, everything there is more filling. you start digging, after a while its starting to get dark, but you finally hit something. A slate of some kind, on it are markings you cant understand, a few look like extremely stylized versions of actual letters, the rest are just scrawls. you put it in your vehicle and keep digging. you find more slates, each one half an inch deeper than the last, except the first one, which could easily have been millions of years old, but the first signs of something smart enough to write this were just a few hundred thousand years in the fossil record, had someone been lost to time? An ancestor of some kind that was smart enough to have a writing system? It would've had to have been an EMPIRE in order to have placed these tablets so regularly, eventually you pack your stuff up and leave, ready to return the next day.

In the morning you come back, somehow the hole you dug is already sprouting plants? Weird. But not impossible, so you keep digging. eventually you hit something, not another tablet, something much bigger, something unmoving. if you hadn't found the tablets you would've thought it was just the rock layer. But this was smooth, and a bit too porous to be any local rock, it was created, not made by the earth. But not like any material you've ever seen, how had it held up so much soil for so so long? Whatever it was, it was part of something. so you tried to dig around it, but it just kept going, after hours searching in every direction you finally gave up. You tried to break it. Even though it chipped strangly easily, it was way too thick. You left your drill at the office, and it was getting dark, so you loaded everything back in your car and drive home.

part 1 idk if I'll remember to write more of this I'll probably forget the entire premise and plot uhhh notes under cut ig?

sorry to any archeologists for getting your profession really really wrong idk if yallre just bones or if you dig up other shit oe if that's some other ologists job

try guessing what the next part is gonna be about (besides turning in the tablets to the museum that parts probably obvius) and I'll tell you if you're right

[wardennthorne]

he has transfixed me

[agabus]

if i see one more astarion post about how he's "not actually suave" "y'all failed the deception check" one more time i am actually going to flip a table in real life. i am so fucking tired

just. the idea a ton of y'all apparently have that the behaviors victims of abuse adopt to protect themselves "isn't who they truly are" and "is the mask they show the world" that you as their loved ones NEED to "take off" in order for them to "truly heal" and "be authentic" is soooooo invalidating <3 please stop <3

i am a DV survivor and i run into this same thought pattern in real life a lot. a lot of who i am as a person is necessarily shaped by having been through abuse. i am not even talking about trauma responses and shit like that, i mean like, my actual personality is in part the way it is because of the abuse. i cannot stress enough how much this is Literally Normal and not something that Needs To Be Fixed. i do not need someone who "truly loves me" showing up in my life and telling me that i don't actually understand anything about myself, and probably never would have been able to, because my abuse made me somehow entirely incapable of any level of self-awareness, but thankfully i met magical You who can reach past the veil of the person i think i am and try to be and want to be in order to find the Real Me™ who i Really Am and who you think I would have been if you like, went back in time to before that stuff happened to me and plopped me in a safe environment and checked back in a few years.

that is not who i am, because what i went through is part of me. how i responded to it is part of me. i was abused, it sucks, but you can't unring that bell, i didn't ask you to, and i don't want you to. i like myself the way i am. i like those parts, you can't have them. this isn't a mask, it's my face.

what i hear, when you guys say astarion is fake, or that he's just putting on a persona, or that he's just that way because of what he had to do for cazador, is that you do not trust survivors to define ourselves. that you think we are broken and we need our bad experiences loved out of us. that we don't know who we are, or if we do, we're liars, or that we're "letting them win" by keeping the tools we used to escape them.

astarion doesn't resent being the "charming rake," he loves it. he keeps it, even after he confesses his feelings for you, and even if he does get more comfortable being silly, that's not proof he was "wearing a mask," it's proof that he's, you know, a person capable of different levels of intimacy with different people.

tl;dr: astarion knows who the fuck he is, he doesn't need you to recover his "real" personality.

[universalcarnival]

tiredly waves

[wild-at-mind]

To the majority of people, leftists and liberals are the same. Not the majority of people on tumblr on instagram or wherever else people 'do politics', but people.

[panicbones]

i could go on for so long abt orb in so many different ways. my first ultra starting off strong by poison of the mind

[gameclam4]

no no guys im serious this time. i need to see a professional 😂😂

[smellslikebot]

right before the "hlvrai" stream started, a mod in the wayneradiotv discord posted a reminder that their streams are for 18+ viewers only and, not to be mean, but seeing the way a lot of people acted during that........ yeah i can see why they'd want to call attention to that rule in particular 😭

[r0b0friend]

the metamorphosis feels like a story about disability sometimes. To Me.