#this results in me doing close to nothing whenever I'm done with work school or my internship

[just-ornstein]

I'm starting to see why Dominic got so sick of that work-buy treadmill lol.

[umepnnn]

3DOLC x ROE — results.

challenge created by @starliet and @cleostoohot 🖤

sorry (and not sorry) for the long hiatus cuz i'm enjoying life :)

so a few days ago i came across several posts about their challenge and i decided to try it out ! i didn't plan to post or anything so there wasn't a "what i'll be manifesting" post, but the results were so insane i had too make one.

ଓ affirmations i used:

regardless of everything...

nothing can ruin my manifestations

i always manifest within 3 days or less

i have everything i desire

ଓ what i manifested:

always confident and friendly, good at socializing

that's exactly what i did. i feel like a social butterfly at school and it's easier for me to join in convos now. making friends and having small talk just became easier for me. and i don't overthink so much anymore

being more included in my friend groups

i have a group i hang out with at uni for like 4-5 months now but i wasn't rlly active until this challenge LMAO now i'm like so comfortable with everyone and felt more like a part of the group. it also went like this with my other friend groups that i just started hanging out since this year. i actually speak to people individually now woah :)

getting closer with an SP

idk i thought this guy was cute so i just included this and at first the situation was: he's close with my friends but he's not in any of my friend groups so we don't hang much at all. but then after 2-3 days since this challenge, our mutual friend suddenly ADDED HIM into the group out of the blue and we all started going out and he is SUCH A GENTLEMAN to me + he added my socials as well hehe

school is fun, assignments are easy & no stress

literally came to school to chit chat and i'm not stressed at all. i get my work done on time and everything goes so smooth fr. and the best part is my classmates are the sweetest ugh SCHOOL IS FUN (they are the uni friend group i just mentioned up there) and they'd always gather around my seat lol and we'd chat the whole class.

bright smooth clear skin

same skin care routine – skin clearer than ever. no longer uneven dark spots or small little bumps <3 smooth like a baby's bottom :) my mom actually thought i was wearing makeup when i literally just washed my face n removed all the makeup !!

no dark circles

i slept like usual but my dark circles rlly went away since this challenge i'm actually surprised (even tho it should go away cuz it's the law lmao) and usually they'd still show when i have my makeup on but now it's wayyy less noticeable

friends from other countries coming to mine so we could hang out

just went out with one the other day lmao so check ✔️ i guess

everyone cares about me and is very nice to me

yoo my friends were so patient and attentive to me and even the taxi drivers are nice, they'd start convos and not in a creepy way. everyone is so nice for real <333

ଓ what i did:

i just read the list and affirm whenever i can, mostly focused on the 4D and know it's inevitable that they'd manifest <3 cuz it's already mine the moment i think i have it. and honestly the "nothing can ruin my manifestations" line helped me a lot.

other than that i did nothing in the 3D. i never initiated anything. they all just came to me just ✨ like ✨ that ✨

i got most of my desires within 3 days but i still continued affirming after 3 days cuz like why not? it's like i'm doing the challenge again or sum but yes i still get desired results after that.

btw i also listened to quite a few subliminals alongside doing this challenge just because i can xD even for the same desires and like they both manifested but anyways i'll make a separate post on my subliminal results.

© umepnnn 2021 – all rights reserved.

[note from a later date //29 jan 2024]

i have been on a hiatus since then until now, because i was busy with a lot of stuff i didn't have much time to learn and post astrology stuff here ~

i am still busy as ever and i don't plan on coming back here anytime soon (mayyyybee idk) but i still come on tumblr quite often cuz i loveee our astrology & manifesting content

and somehow today i checked my draft and saw this whole post here from three years ago i'm like wuhhh totally forgot.

BUT! everything i said is true fr like the "friends from other countries coming to mine so we could hang out" last year literally TEN of my friends came to my place (they're from 4 different countries) and I even went on trips with some of them — mind u i havnt seen most of them in like 2 years at the time

trust me manifesting is sooo easy just think u have it and u have it

thanks for reading and stay healthy stay safe everyone <3 cya

[reneesghostinthelivingroom]

mentor!ursula callistis x student!fem!reader comforting her after a failed practical exam please comfort and fluff bc i missing her sm rn 😔🫶 thank youuuu!

Better Than Nothing

|| mentor!ursula callistis x platonic!student!fem!reader

|| Warnings; reader's like a daughter to Ursula and vice versa, reader feels anxiety/panic about her test results, Ursula comfort, hints at not so great parents, short drabble

|| Summary; when reader finds out she failed, her world feels like it's crumbling. Ursula takes notice.

Requests closed!

Started; November 13th

Finished; November 15th

~~~

10%. Your most recent report card seemed to almost be glaring at you. 10%. You got 10% on your practical exam in Professor Ursula's class and it felt as though the world around you was shrinking. Collapsing in. You were a good student, you got good grades and understood most of what you were taught. You'd even gone and asked Ursula for extra classes when you both had the free time. So how did you do so poorly...? Your hands trembled as you held the paper between them. Sitting silently in your seat at the back of the class.

Ursula had been at the front, sitting at her desk and talking with some students who had questions about their finale marks. When she noticed you. Over the time she's spent with you, she'd grown a bit of a soft spot. Viewing you almost like a daughter to her. She could tell you were distraught about your mark. It made her wonder how your parents would react whenever they found out, given by how freaked out you seemed... she could only guess. She frowned at that.

"Professor Ursula?" The student she had been talking to tilted her head to the side. A little confused when Ursula seemed to not hear her question.

"Oh! Um, I'm sorry, repeat that for me?" Ursula gave a sweet smile. Hoping she didn't hurt the kid's feelings. She repeated her question and Ursula helped her out. Then when she was done with the students at her desk, she made her way over to you and the finale bell rang.

The students left the class, but her focus was on you. You hadn't even moved to get up, even when the finale dismissal bell went. Signalling the end of the school day. Ursula sat down with you, her eyes watching carefully through her glasses. Thinking about what to say. "Are you okay, Y/N?" She asked. Her tone careful and considerate for your feelings. She knew you tried hard. But her class... had never been a strong point for you.

"10%... all that effort and that's still what I got?" You slapped the paper with one hand. The sheet making a sound as you looked to Ursula. Who frowned and rested her arm on the desk.

"You did better than last time." She didn't know if that was the most comforting thing to say. But she was really trying. Besides, she was right. Last time you had gotten a zero. 10% was better than nothing. "We'll just have to work a little harder together, okay? How about you meet me in my office later this evening?" She placed a hand to your head and you looked up at her. Your eyes sad and full of disappointment in yourself. You had been trying hard... why couldn't you grasp it?

"Okay..." You mumbled.

Ursula gave you a sad smile, bringing her hand down to your jaw and cupping your cheek. Thumb brushing over your skin in a comforting gesture," you're smart. Okay? Don't ever let a test result define you. Not everyone is perfect at everything. I've messed up a lot in my life. That just means there's room for us to grow." She took a glance outside, thinking about the moon and that night with a distant look in her eyes.

You felt confused by that. What could Ursula have done? You didn't know, but the look in her eyes told you maybe it wasn't a conversation for you to hear. She looked back to you as she stood," I'll see you around 7?"

With a nod, you stood up too. Gathering your things," 7." You agreed and walked out of the class. Her words helped you a bit, but you still felt like there was a massive weight over you. What would your parents say? You tried to push the thoughts aside and focus on putting your all into tonight. After all, you'd get more time with your favourite teacher. Ursula was like a mother figure to you. She's helped you a lot and you didn't know what your grades would look like without her guidance. So you wanted to impress her and make her proud.

[chenxhen]

Being Above Average but of Average Social Standing

The Tao that can be trodden is not the enduring and unchanging Tao. The Tao-Path is not the All-Tao. The Name is not the Thing named. - Laozi, Tao Te Ching

I know I'm intelligent. I've never done an IQ test, because I believe it's just another unnecessary box people are placed into. But, growing up, I've been told by teachers and other intelligent people that I'm intelligent. I've always thought school was too easy, and was recommended into gifted programs. Everything from Math to English, I was either top of the class or close to the top. And I know I'm intelligent as well. I see it in the way I think and convey my thoughts. 

Apart from academic excellence, I also have many talents. My parents were very adamant on making me a "cultured" individual. I was placed into various extracurricular classes ever since I was four or five years old. Dance, visual arts, and vocal lessons were the ones I enjoyed the most, and also the ones that came most naturally to me. I also love to read and write prose and poetry. I grew up performing, and honing these skills. I'm very self-critical (another quality of intelligence), so I would always try to improve. I believe in the capacity of any human being to be able to do what any other human being can do. Of course, there are certain limitations resulting from our genes, but we're still all human beings. If one tries hard enough, the limits are boundless. 

I'm also quite good-looking. I've received many compliments, and I'm very confident in my appearance. I also dress well, work out, and take care of myself to maintain my appearance. 

And to add on top of all of this, I'm not a boring prude either. I know how to have fun. I'm quite witty, and I love to be silly. 

Now, I'm not saying all of this to boast. I'm not perfect, and I'm certainly not the best at everything. I can't play an instrument, sometimes it takes me a while to feel the beat of a song, I don't speak the most eloquently, and I certainly don't have model-like good looks. I'm aware of this. I see when other people are better in these ways. I always compliment people where they deserve to be. I was raised to be modest, humble, and to see the good in others. I'm just very well-rounded, and as a whole above average. 

Why does this matter, and why am I speaking on all of this? Well, despite excelling in many ways, I come from a very humble family, finances wise. As a result, my opportunities in life were always limited. Another crutch to this reality is that I'm a first generation immigrant. My parents and I came to Canada in 2007, after I had just completed first grade in China. We came here with very little money, and my parents had to restart their lives. They worked lower middle class or working class jobs to make ends meet. Our connections were limited to people in these sectors of society as well. The focus was always on making more money and climbing up the social ladder. This is why going to a good university, getting a good degree, a good job, and making a lot of money is so important to us. However, it created many problems for my up-bringing. 

My family was dysfunctional, the pressure was on me to dig us out of a hole I wasn't a part of digging, and I had very few friends. I had nothing material to show for my excellence. I'm also a female, with quite the baby face. People like to judge. Humans are superficial. And we create expectations of others in our minds out of these incorrect prejudices. When people first look at me, they more often than not think I'll be a weak, demure, and simple girl. They won't expect me to have all the abilities I hold. Whenever there's a disconnect between a person's expectations and realities, discomfort arises. It triggers a fight or flight response, because there's a sense of unfamiliarity and fear. The disconnect I cause in people's minds is probably quite great. People either love me or hate me because of it. All of this meant I had very little support from the people I most wanted support from - my family and my peers. I was intimidating to most people my age, and my family had very little time or money to spare me. 

As a result, I've always felt pressured to prove myself. There has always been such a great weight on my shoulders to do anything that would show people just how great I am, and what I can achieve beyond people's expectations of me. Eventually, I became drained. It's not easy when I'm able to see past what's in front of me and onto the bigger picture. I'm constantly helping others, when I lack the most support. I won't lie, some of this I did create for myself, because people just don't stimulate my brain enough, or aren't able to match up to me, and I don't feel comfortable asking those I consider "weaker" than me for help. 

At the age of 18, I began losing my mind to it all. I had very little friends - if any I considered close, I wasn't doing what I wanted, and I became depressed. I had just gotten into university, but it quickly dawned on me that this wasn't what I wanted at all. I was doing all of this in search of something that was in actuality meaningless to me. I don't care about money or status. All I want is to live a simple life, and let the days pass me by stress-free. I transferred out of several university programs, dropped out completely, and went to college instead. It made me feel incredibly insecure. Now I had absolutely nothing to show for who I am on the inside. I was back at square one. It felt like my life was starting over. This feeling only brought me down more. I felt like a failure, and I began to lose my way. 

Today, I'm settling back into who I am. I don't have to prove anything to anyone. The future seems incredibly uncertain, but there's one thing I'm incredibly certain of -  who I am and my value. I'm incredibly valuable. It sucks that most people just won't ever see that. But, I have accepted it for what it is. Society is made for the average person, and those who are on par with me will see me for all that I am. I just have to continue to be my best self, and hope for a future where I'm not taken for granted. Results are what matter, not the journey. 

If you are average, I'm telling you to be grateful for being average. It's the luckiest thing a person can be in this society. However, I won't ever dumb myself down to fit in. The results will be shown in my satisfaction with life, and self-actualization (a little Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs reference to end this off). 

Best to everyone. 

Love, Chenchen ♡

[cherryonigiri]

nanami kento [evenings with you]

nanami kento x reader || cw: descriptions of blood/injuries, light angst

a/n: this is just self-indulgent writing for me but i'm v stressed about school rn and this is the result. just imagine that y/n is a bio/medical phd candidate lol.

Nanami can tell that you're stressed. Usually you savor the nights he's not on overtime, asking him about work and refusing to leave his side for most of the evening. He's used to you being attentive, so the fact that you've asked him the same question twice within the last ten minutes is already setting alarm bells ringing in his head. You're constantly fiddling with something, or flashing furtive glances towards the bedroom when you think he's not paying attention.

It only gets worse after dinner. You insist on washing up, something about how you want him to 'enjoy his night off.' Nanami compromises, silently grabbing a towel and drying the dishes. It's clear that your mind is elsewhere. Your hands scrub the porcelain on autopilot, and he can hear you muttering under your breath.

Every now and then you'll mutter a list of tasks under your breath. Nanami remembers you mentioning that things were hectic in lab. You're almost always still working when gets home from work, even when it's well past when you eat your dinner. It's clear that you've had a busy day-- the apartment is far more cluttered than it usually is. There are post-it and pieces of scrap paper stuck to every single surface, and a forgotten pile of folded laundry rests on the couch.

An intense burning sensation across your palm causes you cry out. "Shit!" You drop the knife you were washing in favor of cradling your already bleeding hand. Nanami is instantly by your side, firmly pressing the dishcloth against your cut. There is a worrying amount of red seeping into the fabric, so he silently ushers you to the bathroom.

It's a strange reversal of roles. He's used to being the one leaning leaning against the counter while you bandage his wounds. Instead, it's you who is perched on the marble surface, wincing as he dabs an antiseptic soaked cotton ball against your injury. "Sorry, I'm almost done," he says when you let out a loud hiss.

"It's fine," you reply, sheepishly looking away. "I should have been paying more attention."

Nanami chooses to only respond with a nonchalant hum, focusing on cleaning your palm. The two of you sit there in comfortable silence while he applies ointment to the cut, adding gauze once he's finished. It's only when he reaches for the bandages that he decides to ask. "What's stressing you out?"

Your eyes widen as you realize you've been caught. Nanami is rarely home early these days, especially since he's been mentoring Itadori on behalf of Gojo. (Not that you mind - in the few times you've met Itadori through video call with Nanami, the pink-haired student's sunny disposition has never failed to cheer you up.) When he'd texted you saying he'd be home by dinner, you'd jumped at the opportunity to spend some much needed time with him. You'd pulled out the stops, cooking something a little fancier, and intent on spending the earlier part of the evening cuddling with him. Secretly, you had planned to sneak out of bed after he'd fallen asleep (he always goes to bed early on days like these) and finish preparing for the gauntlet of meetings and presentations you had tomorrow. It was your fault for putting off the tasks, and you didn't want to let your own bad habits get in the way of some quality time with your boyfriend.

"It's nothing, I just have a lot on my plate tomorrow." You do your best to laugh it off, but quickly trail off once when you catch Nanami's deadpan expression. He's always been too good at seeing through your white lies. "I put off some work..." A raised eyebrow from him prompts you to continue, "And I was planning on doing it after you went to bed..." You can't help it when your face scrunches into a pout. After all, now your carefully-laid deception has been revealed.

When Nanami bursts into amused chuckles, you're momentarily surprised, but quickly go back to sulking. "Stop laughing at me Ken!" you whine, "I'm a--"

"Self-aware procrastinator," he finishes your sentence with an amused grin. "I know love, I know. I've seen you write far too many papers within 24-hours of a deadline to be surprised." He presses an affectionate kiss against your wrist.

You scowl at your boyfriend, snatching your bandaged hand away from his grasp. "I'm glad that my suffering is entertaining for at least one person." You stomp back to the bedroom in faux-anger, smiling when you hear Nanami's footsteps not far behind you.

When he steps into the bedroom Nanami drapes his frame over your shoulders, his warm torso nestled against your back. "It is one of your more...endearing traits," he murmurs into your ear before pressing a kiss into the crook of your neck. You can feel your cheeks and ears tingle at his words of affection.

"Sometimes you can be such a sweet talker," you mumble to yourself while you change into your pajamas. This week it's been an old Jujutsu tech hoodie and a pair of well-worn athletic shorts.

"Only for you," Nanami replies while he undoes the buttons of his outfit, chucking his tan pants and blue button up into the laundry basket in the corner. He dons a pair of sweatpants before returning your side to recapture you in another affectionate hug. It's a well kept secret of the Kento-Y/N household that Nanami Kento likes to lounge around shirtless in the privacy of his apartment. (You've been sworn to secrecy, but only because your boyfriend claims that Gojo and the students would have a field day teasing him if this information were to be made public amongst the jujutsu sorcerer community.)

Turning around, you wrap your arms around his waist, burying your nose against his torso and taking in his comforting scent. It's been so long since the two of you have had a moment to yourselves, and for once your hectic thoughts are silenced in favor of sharing a moment of calm bliss with Nanami. He hums in appreciation, thumbs rubbing soothing circles against your hips.

"Do you want to watch anything tonight?" you ask after a few seconds of silence.

"No," he replies. "I was actually planning on reading the briefing Ichiji just sent me. Gojo apparently has another scheme up his sleeve." You giggle when your boyfriend lets out a pained sigh. On more than one occasion, your boyfriend has ranted to you about Gojo's unorthodox approach to exorcism. "I swear that idiot shaves a year off my lifespan every time I go on a mission with him," Nanami complains. "He's taking away the years I could spend in Malaysia."

You hum thoughtfully before responding, "Then do you mind--"

Once again, Nanami already knows what you're going to say. "Just remember to bring your laptop charger, I know you have a thousand tabs open on your computer right now," he says while exiting to the living room. After a few moments you join him, overburdened laptop and charger in hand. You both take your usual spots in the living room, him resting comfortably in the center of the loveseat and you sitting on a floor cushion, nestled between his legs. Soon you've fallen into a groove, fingers steadily typing on the keyboard. The warmth of Nanami's presence next to you brings a sense of calm, giving you the grounding focus you need to finish off the last of your tasks.

As he thumbs through the printouts Ichiji gave him, Nanami can't help but let his eyes drift towards you every now and then. You look so adorable when you work. From the way your brow furrows whenever you reread a line, to the way you unconsciously chew on your lip when you scrutinize your draft for any errors. Every now and then he'll gently run his fingers through your hair, relishing the content sighs you let out in response.

It only takes about another hour before you're (finally) closing all your tabs (he still doesn't know why your laptop hasn't crashed yet). As you scroll through social media, your head begins to droop. Soon enough you've fallen asleep, breaths coming in soft and even puffs as you rest against his thigh. Smiling to himself, he puts down his papers and gently lifts your body from the floor. He's careful not to wake you as he slowly makes his way back to the bedroom.

Setting you on the bed, he tucks you under the blankets before lying beside you. The moonlight coming through your window softly illuminates your relaxed features, and he softly traces the outline of your face with his thumb. As he continues to caress your cheek, his eyes are drawn to the dark circles under your eyes. He rarely falls asleep after you these days - between his physically demanding occupation and the ever growing number of things you are responsible for at work- he's often the first to fall asleep from sheer exhaustion while you work well into the night. Not to mention that he's had to spend an increasing number of nights away from you, either on challenging missions or accompanying Gojo's students. And while he knows most of your stress comes from being a student, he can't help but feel guilty about all the additional distress his status as a jujutsu sorcerer has caused you.

When you started dating him, you insisted that Shoko teach you how to suture. He hates how much your stitches have improved since then. The neatness of your stitches is a constant reminder of how much you've endured because of him. When he hears you trying to muffle your sobs into a pillow, he swears he can feel his heart crack in his chest, hurting more than any kind of physical wound from battle. Those nights end with him holding you tightly to his bandaged chest, murmuring reassurances and affection into the crown of your head until you've calmed down enough to fall into a fitful sleep. Even when you're unconscious he'll still continue, words morphing into apologies for the sadness he's inflicted upon your shoulders.

Feeling his eyelids being to droop, Nanami presses one last kiss against your forehead before laying down. He wraps his arms around your waist, surrounding you with warmth, hoping that his presence will be enough to keep your nightmares away, at least for tonight. I love you, y/n is the last thought he has before he drifts away, ready to dream of a tropical sunset and a peaceful future with you by his side.

[repo-net]

Falling For It Again

It was just another sleepless night for Nagisa. Trying to get his work done just before the deadline. Again. He wishes he'd find himself a less restrictive and time-constraining job, but it pays really well, and securing his child's future was the main goal to him. He's already tolerated much, much worse workspaces anyways.

Downing another cup of coffee as the clock struck 11:30pm, his attention was directed to the fact that there wasn't any coffee left at all in the mug. Great, now he had to get up and make another brew... he really should find another alternative to caffeine, it felt like the effects of keeping him awake wasn't as effective anymore.

Sighing to himself, he stood up, not forgetting to stretch a little before going over to the kitchen to make himself his fourth cup for the night.

That is, until he was distracted by the noise of cups being moved around, shelves being opened from inside it... what was in there? If it's another one of those rodents, he really hated having to deal with-

"Uwah, father!"

Oh. It was just them... what's his child up to at a time like this? He certainly didn't raise his kid to be the type to stay up for hours, he knew too well the consequences that come from that.

"What are you doing still awake at night? You haven't forgotten that you still have school tomorrow, have you?"

"No, no! Actually, it's been on my mind all day... school, that is."

Hm? What was this about? Something from school was keeping them awake? Could it be another exam? Or some sort of school bully?

... Nagisa grit his teeth at the thought of the latter possibility. He really wasn't going to hesitate getting involved if that was what was going on.

"Come on then. Let's talk about it in the couch. ... Up you go."

He picked the child up by the back, carrying them all the way to the living room sofa. Admittedly, Nagisa wasn't exactly having an easy time carrying an entire kid around, but seeing as how much they liked it whenever someone else lifted them up, he thought he'd try anyways.

... Even if he was a little out of breath by the time he actually got them to the sofa.

"... Hf. So, what's been on your mind? And please be honest with me. I don't mind you keeping secrets from me if they're embarrassing, but be as transparent with me as possible if the issue is serious."

"W-Well... um... w-what does i-it mean when... whenever you're close to s-someone, and you get this... weird f-feeling in your heart...?"

... What?

"Could you... explain that a little better?"

"What I-I mean is, um... there's this p-person in my class that... w-whenever I'm with t-them, I get a-all soft and my brain t-turns off... I also f-feel really hot too..."

Oh. Ohhh. Yeah, okay.

So even his own kid was as much of a hopeless romantic as he was... good lord. Nagisa really wishes some of the less embarrassing traits that he had when he was young didn't get passed on to his offspring, but well, he figured that it's at least proof this kid really is his.

How was he to go about this...?

Seeing his child hide their flustered face away with their hands, he just chuckled a bit and started patting them on the head.

"That's a special feeling. It's a similar feeling to what me and your mother have."

"Like you and mother...?"

"Well, yes. Though it's a lot more complicated than that. You and your mother are the most important things to me. Really, I'd say that having that feeling for your mother, which resulted in you being with me right now... it's the only time I've done something right."

He cleared his throat as soon as he saw his kid look at him with confusion, wondering what the hell he was getting all monologue-y for. Why was he talking about this to his kid anyways?

"A-Anyways. What you're feeling right now is completely normal. There's nothing to be ashamed of. I was just like you when I was your age, you know."

"R-Really? Father was called a hotpot my age too when the other kids saw me like this?"

"Aha, well... their words were a little more creative than that. But yes, I was just as lost back then as you are now."

He started playing around with his child's cowlicks, continuing to speak.

"Really though, if you want my advice, I'd say just spend more time with that person, times like these won't last forever, so make the most of it. You'll find out your answer eventually."

"It won't last forever?"

"Well, yes. You can't stay young forever. Someday you'll be just like me, old and wishing to be your age again. You like that person, right? Then it should stand that being with them will make you happy. Opportunities for happy memories should never be passed on. So just have fun and relax."

The child just nodded in silence, a more encouraged smile on their face now, but their father looked away for a moment, seeming rather conflicted and nostalgic... before looking back at the kid with a more serious look in his eyes.

"With all that said though... if you ever, ever feel like you're being used by this person and they're using your feelings for them for their own gain... you need to let those feelings go. I was very thankful your mother didn't end up like her as our relationship went on..."

"Her?"

Nagisa caught himself slipping, quickly recomposing himself to hide away the rather bitter feeling he had in his face.

"Ah, nothing. The point is, don't let others take advantage of you liking them for their own gain."

"Okay... I think I can get it."

A smile on Nagisa's face found itself curling up in pride.

"Good. But again, just live in the moment and enjoy yourself. You're a smart child, I'm sure you can handle it."

"You think I'm smart...?"

"Smarter than me."

He gave a slightly bigger smile, ruffling the child's hair as he sighed, looking at the clock. It was almost midnight now.

"Now then, get on back to bed. You still have school tomorrow, and well, if anything, I don't think this person you have feelings for would want to hang out with someone who has dark circles around their eyes."

"Wha?! That happens if you stay up?!"

"Mhm. Best you be a good child and not stay up, then? Now come on, let me take you to your room."

Rubbing the child's head again, he picked them up to give them a piggy ride back to their room, though he'd only hope that the young Shingetsu didn't notice his breathing get heavier and heavier...

[namjoon-koya]

Hey there, I just LOVE your work with avengers x daughter!reader so I had a request for you...I'm sorry if it's too much..

Could you write an imagine where the reader is the daughter of Stephen Strange. She never went to school but learnt magic with her dad and became an avenger. She was best friends with Peter and was also secretly crushing on him, and was always open to her dad about this but she couldn't tell Peter because he was always telling her stuff about MJ so her dad encourages her into confessing to Peter and she actually ends up with him?

(A/N: dude I haven’t done a marvel request in a while 🥺 but this request is really cute so I’ll do it!!)

Warning: maybe just the reader feeling insecure, but that’s about it.

Being the daughter of a sorcerer was pretty amazing if you do say so yourself, it’s not everyday where a teenager learns magic and uses it against criminals. It also wasn’t everyday where a teenager would join the avengers along side with their father, Steven Strange was your father it was always the both of you, but he would always be busy with being a doctor and everything UNTIL he got into a car accident and was put in the hospital. He wasn’t the same after that.. the car accident messed up his hands badly and his career just vanished before his eyes, until he went on a trip to the Himalayas and found his purpose again. He came back home only to show you what he learned there and told you everything about what happened, after that he moved you into the house where he was trained since now he was the new master for the sorcerers there.

You stopped going to school, but that didn’t mean you’d stop getting an education your father was smart so he taught you eveything he knew. He even taught you magic it amazed him how quickly you learned even Wong was impressed “She might become the new master in the future.” He would always say to Strange which made him proud he knew you’d be amazing if you did. After teaching you everything he knew about magic he decided to introduce you to the avengers, EVERYONE was shocked that he even had a daughter “so why didn’t we know about her?” Tony asked “it wasn’t necessary for you guys to know especially since she didn’t know any magic like I did.” He simply responded.

Everyone become like a close family to you, Steve taught you about his era and even how to draw which was amazing since his drawings looked very realistic. Natasha was like a mother to you, she’d given you so much advise and even how to fight (but you never liked fighting against her since she’d always win.) Thor was like a fun uncle you two broke so many rules and he’d even challenge you to see who could eat the most PopTarts (yeah you’re losing this one too.) Bucky was a bit harder to get close to, he wasn’t sure of himself or anyone else besides Steve, Steve didn’t tell you everything about his past only that Bucky endured a lot of painful things which made him not able to trust people quickly. He slowly did start trusting you afterwards when you talked to him more and showed him the magic your father taught you.

Then there was Peter Parker who was around your age, the both of you became friends quickly when Tony introduced him to you. The both of you shared the same interests in things and whenever Peter was having trouble you’d be the person he would always text or call. It was only a few months later did you realize your feelings for him, but unfortunately Peter always talked about a girl in his class named MJ. At first you tried not showing your feelings about it, but everytime he mentioned her name you couldn’t help; but just roll your eyes. It was obvious he liked her if he mentioned her all the time, you started spending less time with him always saying “I need to go study more spells.” Or “Sorry I’m spending time with my dad.” When really you were sulking around the avengers tower.

You were sitting near Bucky as you had a notebook in your lap as you drew a sketch of him, he never really cared if you drew him he was always happy to see the results when you were done. This time though something was off you were glaring down at the paper and you were pressing your pencil so hard onto the sheet of paper “Y/N is something wrong?” He asked you finally looked away from the sketch and looked at him “n-no! What why would you say that?” You ask nervously. “Well.. you seem to be really.. rough with the paper and I could hear you often mumble some words.” Shit why did you always forget he was a super soldier and he could hear things so easily?! “Have you ever.. liked someone?” You asked brining the notebook a bit higher to your face so Bucky wouldn’t see you blushing “Y/N why are you asking me this? Seriously what’s going on?” He asked.

“Finnne! You can’t tell anyone! S-So.. I’ve been liking Peter for a while and-“ Bucky quickly interrupts you “the spider..kid?” He asked. You sighed “Yes Bucky the Spider-Kid anyways.. I’ve been liking him for a while, but I think he likes someone else.” You frown sadly “he’s always mentioning their name when they have absolutely nothing to do with our conversation so I’ve-“ suddenly you hear someone come into the room you quickly shut your mouth and pull the notebook up to your face again. “and here I thought I was alone in the avengers tower.” You heard Loki say as he sat next to you.

“We were having a conversation.” Bucky said to him while crossing his arms “oh? Do enlighten me about this conversation.” Loki said sarcastically.

Bucky then starts arguing against Loki as Loki only argues against him, you let out a sigh before getting up from the couch and leaving to your room. Once you get to your room you set your notebook down before throwing yourself onto your bed and whine into your pillow, it was so frustrating. You wanted to tell Peter how you felt, but he already liked someone and you were scared that you’d ruin the friendship between the both of you. You got up from your bed and you summoned a portal to where your father was, you stepped inside the portal as you did it closed right behind you.

“Dad?” You called out to him as you did so suddenly you saw your father’s red cape quickly rush to you before wrapping itself around you, you giggled “I missed you too pal.” You saw your father walk down the stairs “Y/N? What are you doing here?” He asked as his cape returned back to him. “I just.. wanted to see you it’s been 2 days since I’ve last seen you.” Your father smiled at you gently “I know and I’m sorry.. I’ve been busy with the other sorcerers and helping them master magic.” You nodded “it’s okay.. I actually wanted to talk to you about something.” You said before going over to sit down, your father followed behind you as he sat down across from you.

Two cups of tea summoned before you both “thank you.” You said taking a sip “You’re welcome now what’s wrong Y/N?” Your father asked. You let out a sigh “you know Peter Parker right?” He nodded “that spider-kid right?” You rolled your eyes “Yes.. well we’ve been best friends for a long time and you know we get along pretty well and I’d say we have similar taste in things and well.. I-I’m in love with him, but I don’t think he likes me.” Your father didn’t interrupt you as he carefully listened to every word you said “he keeps mentioning someone else and I can’t help, but get jealous y’know? I try not to because I don’t want to ruin our friendship, but.. I just really care about him and I want to tell him; but I’m afraid..” you said lowering your gaze down to the ground.

“Afraid? Afraid of what sweetie?” Your father asked “of getting rejected.. or him wanting to stop being friends with me..” you said bringing your knees close to your chest your father quickly gets up and wraps his arms around you “Y/N.. it’s okay to be afraid, but I think you should tell him.”

“But what if he doesn’t like me?” You asked.

“Sometimes not everyone we love will be in our future Y/N, but if you don’t tell him how will you know if he does or doesn’t love you?” He was right, even if Peter didn’t like you like that at least you would know.. “Thank you dad.. I’m going to tell him then.” You said getting up from your chair you summoned a portal to your room before you leave you quickly jump into his arms and give him a hug “thank you dad for the advice.” You say to him he hugs you back gently stroking your hair “of course Y/N I’ll be at the avengers tower soon.” He said letting you go. You nodded before stepping inside the portal and close it, you send Peter a message asking him to come to your room once he was done with school for the day.

While you waited you felt yourself getting nauseous as seconds and minutes passed by what if he wasn’t coming? What if he stopped being friends with you because you didn’t hang out with him anymore? Suddenly you heard your door click open you looked up and saw Peter his faced was flushed as he was breathing heavily “I-I got your text what’s up?” He asked He came running to you? Why would he even do that? You didn’t know what to say you only grabbed your pillow and held it against your face don’t cry, don’t cry! You kept shouting to yourself “p-please turn around Peter.” You mumbled against your pillow. Peter gave you a questionable look before turning around, you slowly pulled the pillow away from your face.

“A-And don’t interrupt me.. please?” You saw him nod “I’ve.. liked you for a long time Peter-“ you saw him tense up “I know it’s awkward, but I need to tell you that I really love you Peter you’ve become such a good friend to me especially when I didn’t have anyone around who was my age, you’ve shown me how to be happy and how to have a fun time-“ your lips trembled “a-and if you don’t like me back that’s okay! I just wanted to let you know because it’s been building up inside of me for a few weeks so-“ before you could finish Peter quickly turned around and pulled you in closer to him before planting his lips onto yours. You gasped against his lips you didn’t expect him to kiss you like that.. and what about MJ? you melted into his kiss his lips were so soft against yours it all felt like a dream..

You both pulled away from each other “P-Peter I thought-“

“Sorry Y/N I’m not really good with my words o-or even showing signs that I like someone.” He said holding you against his chest.

“So.. you liked me all this time? What about MJ?” You asked.

“MJ? She’s just a friend Y/N.. don’t tell me you were jealous.” You pouted as he said that you gently slap his chest “oh hush! Don’t ruin the moment..” you said to him. He laughed while planting a soft kiss on top of your head, you felt your heart flutter “so.. does that mean we’re dating now?” You asked him “if you want to then yes.” Peter said you bury your face into his chest “of course I do dummy I wouldn’t have poured out my feelings like that if I didn’t.”

Bonus!

“See? I told you they’d end up together Rogers.” Tony said to Steve who only scoffed “I thought you were protective of Y/N Tony.” Steve commented back “I am, but Parker is a good kid so I know he’ll treat her right.” While they both bickered Bucky turned his attention to Strange “what about you? How do you feel?” He asked him “I’m happy for her she deserves happiness, but I won’t hesitate to send Peter off to another dimension if he breaks Y/N’s heart.” He said glaring at the TV. Bucky chuckled “I think we’re all on the same page as you.”

[everyhowlmarksthedead]

❛ FALLING IN LOVE WITH A BIKER ❜

with Obispo ‘Bishop’ Losa.

Request: hermaaaaaana, hello😊 literalmente que llevo veinte minutos pensando en que te puedo preguntar but i think i got it. so if it’s okay for you, i would like to request a headcanon with bishop in which he mets the reader for first time and it’s love at first sight or something like that, only if you are comfortable with it. Thank youuuuuuu💖

BY @aquamento

Word count: about 1.9k

Aurora says: this writing hasn't been edited, you may find some grammar mistakes, I'm sorry about that!

Gif credits: to my wonderful @sonsofeorl ✨

Masterlist. You can subscribe to my broadcast list, to be notified whenever I post a writing!

“Please… tell me that bike is yours”.

Bishop is stationed in front of the Reyes carnicería, with the rest of his crew at both sides. His eyes are glued on your anatomy, touring the random tattoos all around your arms and enraptured on the way your hips move covered by a pair of black bike shorts. His heart stops when he sees you hanging the meat packet by your teeth, to wear the leather gloves, before keeping your order on the bag of your Harley.

“Fuck”.

Wearing the helmet, while you sit on top of your motorcycle, you raise your eyes feeling strongly stalked. You can't help but chuckle wearing your sunglasses, before turning on the engine. Chewing a mint gun, you pass them away with a funny smirk installed on your face. Probably, they have never seen a girl like you, and you're not actually surprised after seeing how women are in Santo Padre. You have three kinds: uptight, too old or too used. And you look like candy at a school gate. Mayans are the children.

He begs and prays to run into you, riding the city every night at the same hour, around Felipe's carnicería.

He doesn't lose hope for almost one month. But after this much time, he starts to be desperate. Bishop could have memorized your plate, but he was too busy admiring your mere existence.

Taza tried to help him, by using the database statewide using the model of your bike. But there were too many results, with different names of men and women, and none based on Santo Padre.

He has suddenly fallen in love and he doesn't even know your name.

Until he met you again.

Sipping by the straw of your cup of coffee, you're checking some messages of your father. You have forgotten your laptop in Santa Madre and you need it for work, so you're trying to convince him to bring it to your new town.

“(Y/N)”.

Frowning confused by the male hoarse voice, you raise your eyes from the screen, finding a middle-age man with a dense moustache over his smile.

“Do I know you?”

“I'm Obispo. Obispo Losa, but you can call me Bishop”. He offers you a hand, narrowing it with your left one in an awkward move that makes the two of you laugh. “Southpaw?”

“Got a coffee in my right”. You reply shaking your hand.

“I stopped you 'cause I like your bike”.

“Ain't selling”.

“I wasn't trying to buy it, it's just a compliment”. He says wearing his gloves, bowing down his head for a second. “I run the scrapyard, in case you need a rechange, or something”.

“It's good to know it”.

You watch him leaving you there, puckering your lips while you turn slightly, before continuing with your walk.

He was nervous as fuck trying to you, but it looks like that his trap can works on you.

And actually, it does. He has woken up an interest in you. Not because of his kutte, but because the way he had of licking his incisors with the tip of his tongue when you laughed.

These small details not everyone pays attention to.

And you take the bait. His bait.

You didn't have any excuse to visit the scrapyard, so with all the pain squeezing your heart, you hammer a nail in the back tire of your bike. Almost dragging it for one mile, you reach the place. That's going to cost you some bucks, but it's worth it. Anchoring the kickstand close to the office, you follow the rhythmic latin music to flood into a crowded yard. Sounds like a party. Looks like a party. With the hands kept in the back pockets of your shorts, you lean over your tiptoes trying to find the owner.

“Need help, mami?” A mexican accent makes you turn to your left.

“Yeah, 'am looking for… Obispo?” You say wrinkling your nose at the man with long black hair and a cigar on his lips, having a smoke.

“Yo! Prez!” Turning away, the man yells another name you can't understand.

Your orbs find the darkest ones, but what you see instead of what you were expecting provokes you some bitter shivers. On his lap there's an exuberant woman, wearing nothing but a short skirt and a white lace bra, and one of his hands caressing her thigh. Who the fuck is that guy and who the fuck does he think you are? Regretting your decision of coming, you turn over your steps to not continue looking at him, crossing your arms over your chest almost kicking the dust with the tip of your sneakers.

“You came”. He sounds excited, but somewhat nervous.

“Yeah, and now I would prefer to haven't done it”, you think to yourself.

“Yeah, I just… had a problem with a wheel and a nail”. You reply, shrugging your shoulders. “But that guy can attend me, you don't have to. I mean, you were occupied”.

“Is she jealous?”, he thinks to himself.

“I have time for you, querida”.

Wrong words. You're not going to fall again, not after what you have seen.

“I only need a wheel. I will come back tomorrow evening”.

“Don't you want a beer?” He sounds disappointed and a little annoyed, raising a hand over his shoulder to point at the party happening behind him.

“No, thanks”.

Watching you go is painful. A kind of sorrow that he never thought that he could feel.

After telling his brothers what happened, they counsel him to wait till the next day.

But you don't go to the scrapyard. You don't want to see him, even if you know that you have to pick up your bike.

Finally, you come back two days later.

Knocking the metallic door, you walk inside the office. The man who attended you the first time and another with strange hands receive you.

“I came for the black and red Harley”.

“Yeah, mami, give me a second”.

The men disappear from the place, while you take a seat on an old leather couch, crossing one leg above the other; moving it impatiently. But again, you have to take off your eyes from the screen of your phone, hearing his voice calling you.

“The bike is ready”. Obispo says with a fleeting smile appearing on his face.

“Good. How much do I own you?” You ask getting up, trying to not look at him too much and focusing on the bill he offers you.

“Nothing, it's on me”.

“Thanks, but I wanna pay”.

“Well, ain't gonna charge you”. He sentences with a chuckle.

Puckering your lips with a forced smile, you pass him away to step out from the office, looking for your bike.

“Hey, wait”.

“What?”

“She's just a friend”.

You pretend that you don't know what he's talking about, making him snort rubbing the bridge of his nose.

“The girl. In the party. She's just a friend”.

“Bueno, congrats”. You just reply, about to walk away again.

“I was wondering if you would like to hang out one day”. These words stop your legs. “Have some beers, a ride, maybe a dinner. Or a lunch. Whatever”.

He's trying. He's trying to fix up what he fucked up. And you are not sure about what response you can give him back. You want to say yes, but, for what? To end like his friend? Sitting on his lap almost naked, surrounded by drunk bikers?

“Sorry, I ain't your type. Don't lose your time”.

You can't believe what you just said, sounding so rude and proud. Bishop frowns.

“My type? And which is my type?” Now, you have offended him, watching him intertwining his hands under his abdomen. Expecting.

“Cheap makeup to leave marks. Lingerie and short skirts. Laughter when something isn't funny. Work hard to look like a man's trophy… Definitely, I'm not your type. I mean, you must be however you want to be, but… sorry, that's not my game”.

“That isn't my game either”. He replies tilting his neck to the left side for some seconds. “I prefer the ones who call me out when I'm being a pendejo”.

“Mommy issues?” Making fun of him, you raise both eyebrows. He chuckles shaking his head. “Thanks for the wheel”.

You don't need no man, but could God please send to you a normal one?

Bishop feels fucked than ever. Annoyed. Bothered.

He tries to figure out how to make it up to you, but he has never had to do something like that.

And his brothers can't help him either.

So he plays one of his best cards.

Be sincere.

The next time he sees you walking around, he makes to stop the whole crew behind him. Jumping off from his bike, he crosses the road with a slow sprint to not being run over. Rolling your eyes, you don't stop your path. Not even when he reaches you.

“Can you listen to me for a second?”

Placing himself in front of you, the man takes off his sunglasses.

“I'm hurry”.

“One sec—”.

“One”. You just say, counting it about to walk away. A hand around your left wrists holds you.

“Please”.

Hearing him beg to you wasn't on your to-do list for today. Facing him with no gesture on you lets him know that you are granting him a second.

“You're gonna think I'm crazy because I have never fell in love at first sight, but when I saw you the first time I fucking swear that you stole my heart, querida. I have been looking for you for a month. Every night. Same hour. Trying to catch the opportunity of talking to you. And maybe, just maybe, I tried to find you by the model of your bike”. You can't lie. You weren't expecting that confession. “I really felt like shit when I saw you in the scrap. The way your face changed when you saw that girl sat on me. And I'm really sorry”.

You don't have a word to reply. Confused. Overwhelmed by a lot of sensations running through your body.

“I ain't the kind of man who… you know what I'm trying to say. And I didn't mean to offend you”.

He keeps silent, waiting for you to say something.

“This has been more than one second”. You try to joke, a little nervous. And you make him laugh again.

“Listen, I know a place with the best meat in the whole California, and a lot of different sauces to dip in. It's forty minutes away, but we can have a ride together”.

“Sounds good, but… I'm on my way to work”.

“We can go whenever you want”.

Bishop isn't going to give up, and you know it.

“You said you're in a hurry, let me take you to your job and think about it on this ride”.

You finally accept, knowing that he's not going to accept a decline as an answer.

And when he finds out that you work in the hospital, he's totally amazed.

And he earns your number after being so sincere with you.

“Maybe, just maybe, I put the nail on purpose”. You confess then, walking backwards to the entrance, facing him with a smile on your face.

[seafoamchild]

this semester is going to be stressful i think. i have a javascript class with the teacher whose teaching style i don't like and i feel like it's going to be hard. i also have my internship and my serving job so i don't think i'll be able to do my landscaping job. which is fine, the money is whatever and i'm sick of driving all the way out there anyway, but i will miss my boss. we had a lot of fun together even though he also drove me insane with his chronic lateness and unpredictability. damn we laughed a lot together though. i hope he'll at least stay in touch.

oh also i filed a sexual harassment complaint against this like 70 year old man from work who kept telling me i had nice legs and asking for my phone number to the point where i would turn and walk the other way whenever i saw him. this was back in the summertime, and i just got an email with the case results that basically said he denied everything and said i was lying and so then nothing happened and the case is closed. like omggg. i wonder if he ever for one minute thought "hey, maybe that shit i said was kinda creepy". probably not. but i hope so.

i'm trying not to think too hard about the future. focusing on the here and now as much as i can. it's nice to be seeing someone again, like it's new and exciting, but i also don't want this to turn into something serious. like he is too much younger than me for it to work. and i don't know if i want a serious relationship in general. like those things are fucking intense man. and i simply do not have time. but all i've ever done relationship-wise is serious relationships. i've never really had like a fling or a FWB or anything. so this is new for me and i suppose i'm going to have to communicate this all to him sooner rather than later.

it's weird and fun, having all these changes. it feels exciting and fresh. i've really enjoyed making so many new friends at work, even though they're just work friends. i hadn't realized how much i was isolating myself, doing online school and only ever interacting with my boss at the landscaping job. now i see a lot more people in my day-to-day life and it's very nice. i try to see my friends often but it can be hard. everyone is busy. it's nice to be busy though. my life has been so unstructured pretty much since the pandemic hit, but now it feels fuller and more exhausting and more exciting.

[prxttypxrker]

our endgame [T.S]

fandom: Marvel

pairing: Tony Stark x OC (father-daughter)

word count: 2,607

summary: after five years of pent up guilt and and helping each other cope with the loss of those who didn’t survive the snap, the two girls find themselves in a sudden situation they hoped for, but never really believed would come to play

tag list: @nerdypisces160

A/N: I don’t want to put too much happening in these chapters because I don’t want this to be or feel rushed so they will be relatively short. Also, the events will not 100% be based on endgame because this fic idea is actually based off of an rp I had with a very good friend on discord that I felt would be amazing as an actual story. So as future reference for everyone that reads this—NOT 100% BASED ON ENDGAME. THERE WILL BE DIFFERENCES BETWEEN MOVIE EVENTS AND FIC EVENTS

—

pre endgame

two

She was exhausted, that much could be said. Day in and day out for the last half decade, her friend would visit just to find that she wasn't in the house, but out in the backyard exerting too much energy. It was only a miracle that those who were left never saw her doing what she did every morning, afternoon and night. The activity was so prolonged Tala was sure her best friend got little to no sleep. That day they both discovered the other was still on Earth, she'd seen the never-ending result of visiting Tony Stark and the toll it had. The search for how to get their friends and family back never left either of their minds, but at the same time it was too difficult to figure out on their own. Even if they discovered a way to save everybody, it was two against the universe—an odd that was never going to be in their favor.

Tala marched through the tall grass that led to the fenced in yard, immediately coming to view with the many targets and practice dummies. Any size, shape and form of a sword—all covered in either a dark glow or blue sparks—laid in a pile against one side of the fence. She bent over and tried to pick one up, only to have black electricity nearly shock her if she hadn't moved back in time. She sighed and stood up, facing her friend. “Kirsy.” There wasn't a response as the brunette continued to make various hand movements to strike the objects in front of her. “Kirsy. Mind taking a break for a bit?”

Said girl let out a rough breath, the light and dark fading away from everything they engulfed as she set her arms down by her sides. She straightened up and turned to face the only person she'd really had any form of contact with since then. “If I take a break then however much time I spend on it is less time to get stronger.”

Tala rolled her eyes, walking toward a bench covered by the shade of the trees from next door. She patted the spot beside her, waiting until the slightly older of the two gave in and sat in the empty space. “You've been doing this almost every day for five years. You can't stay cooped up in this townhouse blasting everything in the backyard and then replacing them for the next day. You've used it up too much.”

Kirsy chuckled humorlessly, making her friend frown. “I'm not like you, Tala. I can't live knowing that all of them just... aren't.”

“What's the point of surviving being wiped away if you won't do just that? You've been working your ass off non-stop for months on end. You're definitely stronger, so now you just need to take a real break.”

“But Peter and the others-”

“They can wait until we have an actual plan. We can't go who the hell knows where with powers blazing.”

Silence. It filled the open air and hung in the small atmosphere of the pair's own little hero club. Kirsy knew she was right—it was obvious. All that time spent draining herself and her powers each night was starting to take a physical and mental toll on her. What the founder of Stark Industries said himself rang in her head every second of each moment she was still breathing, and instead of using it to rationalize she used it as a fuel to keep going. To her, each and every minute she spent doing anything but training was a pointless minute that everyone who didn’t make it were trapped somewhere. There was really nothing that interested her after the events of the Snap. Whatever career she wanted to get a jump on during high school was long forgotten. Any goals written on her bucket list had no reason in being done anymore. She didn’t even feel like learning anything, but the impeccable loss of half of the universe was something that also kept her needing as much knowledge as possible. It didn’t really feel like there was much of a purpose for the pair of young adults, or at least not for her. It still didn’t feel right to try and have a good life while so many people were gone.

As the girls sat in this familiar and comfortable quiet, a somber look settled on Kirsy’s face.

Flashes of her encounter with Tony slowly transitioned into a recurring dream she’d been having at least once a week for the past few years. A dream that plagued her mind from day to night, never ceasing to rewind and play all over again whenever she stopped to take a breath or get those minimal hours of sleep. It wasn’t that he was in the wrong. She learned soon after she left his home that day that he wasn’t. It was the fact that he was right. If the people who protected Earth for years weren’t able to get everyone back—if the iron legend himself was trapped in a limited oxygenic ship for days and nearly died—then there was nothing he could’ve done for her. Even if she showed him what she could do and he said yes, the others were still living their own lives as best they could during this time of loss, grief and moving forward. It was obvious there was no plan of action or hints to lead them somewhere, but she didn’t want to stop trying. No matter how much Tala scolded her or how weak she became in other aspects while she became stronger within her powers, it just didn’t matter if they couldn’t be brought back. And she had to do it. She had to get everyone back home.

Kirsy cleared her throat, gaining the other girl's attention. “I guess you might be right.” Tala raised an eyebrow, not saying anything in order to let her friend continue speaking. “I need to let myself relax. It’s been five years and there have been no signs of...”

She trailed off at the sight of a shining object in the sky. It wasn’t easy to make out what it was, but it was easy to see that it seemed to be hurtling toward them at a speed no human or all heroes could ever muster. Tala followed her friend’s gaze and her eyes widened. “What is that?”

“I don’t know..” A flash of colors made it familiar to her, though no chance could be taken. She didn’t know who or what was left behind after the Snap, and she wasn’t going to take any risks or chances even after all this time since then. “Do you remember how to shape your shield?”

Tala scoffed, “I may not have run myself ragged but I know how to use my powers.” Without explanation, she closed her eyes and took a breath, the brown of her irises now a purple hue. Purple light engulfed her hands and she began to make a shape with her hands, drawing together a force field that would only grow around the back yard and themselves, leaving an open circle at the top. Once the almost transparent shield was up, electricity surged and sparked at Kirsy’s fingertips. She brought them closer together and tied the live wires, creating an arrow that she was able to shoot into the sky. There was a slight pull when the arrow attached itself, and a jolt went off in her system, and she held onto the rope it created before pulling it down to the ground. In mere seconds the object landed with a loud thud, crashing into some of the targets that were still up. The two let the products of their abilities disappear, both pairs of hands still glowing with the colors of their magistry as they approached the formerly unidentified object. As the smoke from the crash began to clear up there was the familial shine of red and gold. When a cough resonated from within the metal shell, their eyes widened.

All that could be said then was, “Oh, shit.”

“What did we do?!”

“We?! I’m not the one with the shock-y hands!” Tala exclaimed, quickly going to remove the dirt and target dummy remains from atop the man in the suit.

two and a half hours later

“I am so sorry, Mr. Stark. If I knew it was you I definitely wouldn’t have done that.”

“That’s the sixth apology you’ve given me in the past two hours.” Tony told her, a ghost of a smile on his face. “I suspect you don’t usually go around hurtling flying people towards you with electricity coming out of your hands.” The man stated, an ironic tone lying underneath his words.

“Nope—just you.” Tala replied with a grin, not at all letting herself fan girl over the super genius and instead choosing to joke around.

Kirsy glanced between her friend and former chance of saving her other friends. It was weird watching this unfold before her. Approaching him that long ago was completely different than him flying toward her only to end up getting some circuits messed up by two young adults. This time wasn’t a search and beg mission. This time he came to her, and nothing in her occupied space of mind could muster up a reason.

“Mr. Stark..” she started, gaining the attention once more, “why are you here?” She looked up at him. “I mean I came to you five years ago asking for information, which I got, and help that you said you couldn’t give me. We haven’t been in contact since then.”

Tony gazed at her, setting down the coffee the girls made because they felt bad about the incident. He could see the desperation, as well as the fact she practically reeked of it the moment he was fully aware of his surroundings again. He had no clue how strong or weak she was when they had their first encounter, but it sounded like she didn’t let up since then. The force she had in those few seconds of her and her friend defending themselves was something he never thought he would come across; at least not in the form of a 20 year old short circuiting his most recently upgraded iron armor with electric currents that shot out from her fingers. And the other girl? That shield she conjured was definitely something he had never seen before.

After the sneak attack he received earlier that day, he took time to think back to when Kirsy marched herself into his life that day, only to drag herself back out when he couldn’t help her. He was racked with guilt every day since seeing the look on her face when she left, and when the others approached him that morning reconciling with her was one of the first things on his mind.

He cleared his throat noticing the gap of silence between the three of them, and set down the mug in his hand. He leaned back against the chair, shoving his hands in the pockets of the hoodie he wore underneath the suit. “Some... friends came to me today. Asked for some assistance in creating a sequence that would allow us to go back and get the stones.” The girls’ eyes widened, but neither moved to interrupt the stay-at-home scientist. “I didn’t want to help them at first. I was able to build a life past what happened; I couldn’t jeopardize that again. But memories made me figure that I at least had to try. I did it, and I know I told you I couldn’t help,” He kept a steady look on Kirsy, watching the realization form an expression on her face, “but now I can.”

“So you’re asking for our help?” Tala raised an eyebrow, the anticipation eating away at her on the inside while hope and suspicion shared the stage on the outside.

Tony cast his orbs her way as he stood from his spot, now looking down at the two girls. “I guess I am. So what do you say, kid—you ready to go save your friend?”

“And the universe.”

“Yeah, that too.”

The pair of best friends shared a glance of what could only be a flurry of excitement, anxiety, hope and the readiness that was questions seconds ago. She couldn’t believe this was actually happening to them. She spent half a decade wallowing in self pity and staring at photographs pinned against her wall and mirror, missing those she lost more and more every day. Her dad, her aunt and cousin, her friends, her coworkers, her crush. Everyone but Tala was out of her life for good. Well, she thought it was for good. And even though that seemed to be the case a shred of her never lost sight of the theory on what happened and the possibility that she could have done something back then if given the chance she lost months ago. Now that chance was standing in her half dining room, staring down at her and her lifelong friend and not only offering help her way but also asking for her help in return. It felt like her daydream was coming to life and her nightmares could finally cease to exist, and it was already starting to feel like a weight being lifted off of her shoulders.

With a grin in place of the earlier neutral formation, Kirsy nodded her head firmly. “We’re ready, sir.”

A ghost of a smile twitched at the ends of the man’s lips. “Good, then let’s go.”

Tala’s head snapped toward his figure when he started to walk to the front of the complex. “Wait wait wait. We’re leaving now?”

He turned to look at her with a shrug, raising a brow at her question. “Does that sound like a smart question to you?” The Filipino narrowed her eyes at him. “Look—I have a super soldier, an expert assassin, a thunder god, a green giant with glasses, a girl with proton blasts for hands, and a blue space cyborg sitting around in my old tower. Do you think I want to go waltzing in there without an entourage?”

Tala rolled her eyes and a chuckle resonated from the Dominican girl’s throat. The bickering pair looked over to see her already grabbing keys from a side table by the front door. “As dumbstruck as I am right now, I’m not wasting time in taking this opportunity. So let’s get in the car and go.” No one protested while she marched her way out the door, not bothering to lock the door when everyone was outside because how many people were even left in this city for her to lock her house for safety.

A double beep sounded from the vehicle and she opened the driver door. Tony groaned when he realized he would be sitting in the backseat like the third person of any group hangout, but also not complaining to being able to have a driver for the day like he used to. As he was about to let himself into the car Kirsy announced his name and he shot her a questioning glance. “I may not be making you fly to your old house, but if you call me your entourage one more time I’m going to shock you on purpose this time.”

“Testy.” He muttered, giving her a sarcastic look before getting in. Yet he couldn’t help but still see a part of him in her, and his motive of having her on the team for this grew a bit more.

[cinemavariety]

The Director’s Series: Sofia Coppola

The director series will consist of me concentrating on the filmography of all my favorite directors. I will rank each of their films according to my personal taste. I hope this project will provide everyone with quality recommendations and insight into films that they might not have known about. Today’s director in spotlight is Sofia Coppola

#6 - The Beguiled (2017) Runtime: 1 hr 33 min     Aspect Ratio: 1.66 : 1                     Film Format: 35 mm

During the Civil War, at a Southern girls’ boarding school, young women take in an injured enemy soldier. As they provide refuge and tend to his wounds, the house is taken over with sexual tension and dangerous rivalries, and taboos are broken in an unexpected turn of events. Verdict: Coppola’s most largely feminist work of her canon. The Beguiled is both a moody ensemble tale and a doomed period piece set during the Civil War era. Power plays are passed among the women as they subtly vie for attention from the injured solider they take under their wing. As usual, Coppola has a trained eye for beautiful frame composition. Her use of 35mm brings an extra textured layer to the events - even if they never get as probing as the trailers promised.

#5 - Somewhere (2010) Runtime: 1 hr 33 min   Aspect Ratio: 1.85 : 1                  Film Format: 35 mm

After withdrawing to the Chateau Marmont, a passionless Hollywood actor reexamines his life when his eleven-year-old daughter surprises him with a visit. 

Verdict: Somewhere is Sofia at her most soft, subtle, and minimalist. In fact, this film washes over you like a gentle breeze. Playing on themes she explored in Lost in Translation, Somewhere is a story of a man living a hedonistic lifestyle. Although he is adorned with riches and beautiful people, he cannot help but feel a deep existential loneliness. His lifestyle is interrupted by the arrival of his daughter who slowly helps him wake up from his daze of dissatisfaction by enjoying the moment. Not Sofia’s most exciting, but still wholly satisfying.

#4 - Lost in Translation (2003) Runtime: 1 hr 42 min   Aspect Ratio: 1.85 : 1 Film Format: 35 mm

Two lost souls visiting Tokyo – the young, neglected wife of a photographer and a washed-up movie star shooting a TV commercial – find an odd solace and pensive freedom to be real in each other’s company, away from their lives in America. 

Verdict: While this film didn’t click with me on initial viewing - it’s beauty has grown on me exponentially over the years whenever I revisit it. Lost in Translation, at its base level, is an examining of the social isolation people can feel - even when they are surrounded by people. You know that feeling when you are lonely even in a crowded room? This film is that feeling idealized to celluloid. Scarlett and Bill’s chemistry is just about perfect and we get to bear witness to a pure friendship developing against the turmoil of life’s daily anxieties.

#3 - The Bling Ring (2013) Runtime: 1 hr 30 min   Aspect Ratio: 1.85 : 1 Film Format: RED Epic Digital

Inspired by actual events, a group of fame-obsessed teenagers use the Internet to track celebrities’ whereabouts in order to rob their homes. 

Verdict: The Bling Ring is Coppola’s least successful effort in most film critics eyes - however I found it to be one of her most lively and fun projects she’s ever done. Inspired by a Vanity Fair article, the fact that this film is based on true events makes it even more wildly entertaining. Coming out the same year as Spring Breakers did, this film also projects a spotlight on delinquent youth culture characterized by a vapid and soul-sucking love for materialism. While this film does grow repetitive in structure, Coppola finds a real rhythm in all the robbing the teenagers commit. Emma Watson shines, especially at the end after she is arrested. She continues to be completely ignorant to her actions as she tells reporters “I'm a firm believer in Karma and I think this situation is a huge learning lesson for me... I want to lead a country one day for all I know.”

#2 - Marie Antoinette (2006) Runtime: 2 hr 3 min  Aspect Ratio: 1.85 : 1 Film Format: 35mm

The retelling of France’s iconic but ill-fated queen, Marie Antoinette. From her betrothal and marriage to Louis XVI at 15 to her reign as queen at 19 and ultimately the fall of Versailles. 

Verdict: Those looking for a factually accurate historical tale should look the other way - Sofia created a period piece of her own design with Marie Antoinette. The results speak for themselves. The film chronicles the rise and fall of the young queen as she lavishly exploits her lifestyle of decadence. Kirsten Dunst has always been one of my favorite actresses, and she plays the titular role with such an elegant grace. The color palette of this film is a smorgasbord of colorful and bright pastels, the production design is extremely detailed, and the wardrobes are beyond impressive. Coppola’s choice to implement modern day flourishes such as a quick shot of Converse sneakers, or playing The Strokes over a montage scene is nothing short of an auteur at her finest. All of these elements combine to make a near perfect film.

#1 - The Virgin Suicides (1999) Runtime: 1 hr 37 min   Aspect Ratio: 1.85 : 1 Film Format: 35mm

A group of male friends become obsessed with five mysterious sisters who are sheltered by their strict, religious parents. 

Verdict: Some artists strike gold with their debut feature, and this is most definitely the case with The Virgin Suicides. While I adore all of Sofia’s filmography, none of her other films even come close to the perfection of this film in my opinion. Suicide has impacted me many times in my own life, and Sofia Coppola takes this subject matter and turns into something hauntingly poetic. Loneliness and isolation permeates this film. While these type of themes could become misery porn in the hands of the wrong director, Sofia tackles them with great consideration. What makes this story even more poetic and mysterious is the fact that the story of these five girls is relayed through the memories of a group of obsessive teenage neighbor boys. They are all struck and intoxicated by the angelic Lisbon sisters, who are soon doomed to their rooms for the rest of eternity due to the strict religious fervor of their parents. They recall these events not exactly as they might have happened, but as how they remembered them. The Virgin Suicides is an exploration of the transiency of existence, and how certain people will forever leave their mark, no matter how long after they have passed away. “It didn't matter in the end how old they had been, or that they were girls. But only that we had loved them, and that they hadn't heard us calling, still do not hear us calling them from out of those rooms where they went to be alone for all time... and where we will never find the pieces to put them back together.”

[lasincerite]

For the hardest day in my 2022

It's almost 1am at the time I typed these letters.

I've been recently in a wake-up early challenge, which means I am supposed to fall asleep at around 11pm. But I can't. Even when I tried to close my eyes hundreds of times. All the things coming once have made me feel collapsed literally.

Studying in 12-year schools let me enjoy the moments of being an excellent student, with high and admired achievement that helped me to get a large amount of compliments. Especially I finished up perfectly my 12 years by successfully becoming a student of the one-of-the-best economic university, FTU. But everything turned out to be totally different from my expectation, about a bright-light future that I could have embraced.

The first year in the university was deeply horrible. My total score did not meet the score standard of my oriented faculty. I failed all of the clubs that I applied to. I hardly made any friendships in my class. I did not know anyone except my dormmates and my high school close-knit friends. My day circulated with three main points, the class, the dorm, and my ex-bf's rented room. At first, everything was too overwhelming for me to adapt, hence, I had cried for almost a week. After that, I nearly got on well with the things happening, so I did not feel frustrated for a while. I kept living a normal life in a supposed-to-not-be normal environment as FTU.

Coming to the second year, I was still being lonesome when I met some adorable and humorous people in my class. I learnt to be more extroverted, to actively have a conversation with classmates, which helped me to get a perfect but sometimes strict bf. Albeit, I still had nothing for my own. My career future was still vague, whereas someone I knew had been going for some internships in some noted companies. And the most valuable lesson I learnt from this year was I am the kind of person who quickly gets bored and easily gives up. I'm fear of confronting difficulties and problems, just because I always make excuses that I'm afraid I cannot get the work done well.

I am now third-year student. Still have nothing in my hands. The only thing that I determined to achieve most is the highest GPA in my ability. But the harder I tried, the worse the results I have been receiving, which is the reason why I cannot sleep right now. I remembered all the times and efforts I put into those subjects, all the grey matters and the elaborateness I contributed to every test. But everything seemed collapsed in my mind when I continuously received the really terrible results of those subjects. I've been desperate. I tried to think positively, but I was impotent to do that since these things happened so many times, which I can not overlook as I did previously. I feel like I was betrayed by some invisible things.

It's just the 6th day of the new year, but I have to bust out crying all night. I hate this feeling a lot bc it always makes me exhausted whenever I wake up in the morning. But I don't know what to do now. I am just able to look at nowhere in my room, clearing all the tears in my eyes and wondering myself whether I deserve to get all these things in a coincidence.

[datingadviceonreddit]

I mean, in theory there are things that could be done about it, but in practice it turns out that I can't do any of those things. I've made some friends over the course of my life, but most of them have been just as happy not knowing me, and the few that have stuck around rarely have time for me these days. I've tried to pursue romantic relationships, but the more I do, the closer I come to the conclusion that it's ultimately an exercise in futility, at least for me.I've always wanted to be in a relationship. In a way, I feel like I've been training my whole life to be the best boyfriend I can be. One of the most frustrating things about my lack of success in relationships is that I actually feel like I've come close to attaining this goal. I think I bring quite a bit to the table in a relationship. I'm a kind and patient person, I'm resourceful and intelligent, I'm articulate and great at conversations, I can make people laugh, I reject pettiness whenever possible, I'm physically active and in great shape, I have a variety of interesting hobbies, I'm well read and well educated, I've been gainfully employed since before I graduated high school, I have great career prospects, and I'm good with money. It feels really cringy to type it out like that, but I really am checking a lot of boxes here if I'm being honest. I'm so fortunate, I have so much going for me that so many other people don't, it almost seems impossible that I've had such terrible luck finding someone that might want to share my life with me.I've actually done quite a bit of research into the subject of what women want. I've read books, I've read countless online articles and discussions on various romantic subjects, and I've asked a lot of women directly. I've heard a lot of first hand accounts of terrible partners and terrible dates. I've seen screenshots of men with wounded pride texting things to women that should earn them a prison sentence, I've heard stories of men who wouldn't wipe their own asses or didn't know how to fold laundry, and while most of these stories were meant to be humorous, most of them were deeply, deeply frustrating instead because of the underlying commentary: Yeah, this guy is a total joke, but at least he can get a date. In the course of my research I feel like I've gotten a decent impression of the general standards most women have for men, and frankly the bar is on the floor. Women don't have unreasonably high standards, mostly they just want someone they have chemistry with who is also a mostly-functional adult. With everything I have going for me and with all the times I've shot my shot, it seems almost impossible that I've had such terrible luck finding someone that might want to share my life with me.I've tried a variety of strategies. Online, and IRL, long-distance and local, I've tried being enthusiastic, I've tried being aloof, I've tried being vulnerable, and I've tried being mysterious. Mostly I'm content just being myself, but that seems to have even less success if you can believe it. Dating is a numbers game, I know that. I know no one has a 100% success rate with asking girls out, but damn. From a purely statistical point of view, after all this time, after all these attempts, you'd think I'd have at least one or two success stories to tell you, but I don't.I think part of the problem is that I'm not necessarily showcasing my good qualities in an easily digestible way. I can't make an online dating profile filled with all the awesome things about me without coming across as a self-aggrandizing asshole. I can't even write this post without coming across as a self-aggrandizing asshole. No one is ever talking to me for long enough or interested enough to ask me personal questions, so no luck there. Why can't someone just be interested in me enough to discover these qualities in a natural organic way? I shouldn't have to shove my good qualities down someone's throat in hopes they might like me. I wonder if other people have this problem.I would be okay with striking out if I thought it was a learning experience. Many of my attempts have taught me valuable lessons and informed how I approach the situation in the future, and I'm grateful for those experiences. But as I've gotten older, my failures have gotten less and less educational. Partially because getting shot down is starting to feel more and more familiar, but mostly it's because as my dating pool has gotten older, they don't even bother shooting you down anymore. I can't remember the last time someone said something like "I appreciate it, but I'm not interested, sorry" or "Aww thanks, but I have a boyfriend" or even something like "Sorry, you're not my type". No, these days you just get ghosted. Just radio silence. There's nothing to learn from negative results except "whatever you just did didn't work" and when that happens enough times in enough diverse situations it gets harder and harder to ignore the obvious common denominator: Me.Something about ME is fundamentally incapable of attracting a mate. Maybe it's because I want it too much, maybe it's because I'm significantly less attractive than I think I am, maybe it's something else altogether. The frustrating thing is that I don't know. I don't have any data to work with. No conclusions to draw, except "whatever you just did didn't work". At this point I'm so exhausted by the whole process that it's almost impossible for me to get excited about someone anymore. I used to feel attraction and get hyped, but now I feel attraction and just feel deeply depressed. I used to fall for someone and imagine cuddling, having late night conversations, or growing old together, now I meet a cute girl I have chemistry with and just immediately feel bitter disappointment. I don't even bother asking them out anymore, because I know how it's going to go. I know how it's going to go, because it goes the same way EVERY TIME. The worst part about being this lonely isn't even that there's seemingly nothing I can do about it, it's the fact that even if the girl of my dreams appeared in front of me desperate for me affection, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't even talk to her. What would be the point? I'd ask her out, she'd probably say yes, we'd exchange numbers, I'd text her a couple of times, and then the conversation would almost immediately dry up and we'd never speak again. The same thing happens every time, and it costs so much emotional energy that I just can't justify it anymore. I don't even want it. If the girl of my dreams walked into the room, I'd find an excuse to walk out of it.I just wish I was okay with being alone. I mean, ideally I wouldn't be alone, but since that's apparently not an option, at this point I'd settle for just being content with my own company. If only I could switch off this longing and stem the flow of hormones. If only I could go the rest of my life without ever thinking about it again, I think I'd be okay. I really do have a lot going for me, and I have the potential to live a long happy life, as long as I'm okay with doing it alone. I guess that's where I'm focusing my efforts now. If loneliness is inevitable, I might as well get comfortable.TL;DR: Woe is me and I'm feeling stuck. Anyone else relate to this shit? via /r/dating_advice

[datingadviceonreddit]

This is a going to be a really long post. I usually never vent about anything, but i can't contain myself. I'll put a TL;DR at the end for those who don't like reading. I also have a bunch of questions, they'll be at the end as well. Thanks!So a bit about me. Some of you may know me. I've posted on here a bunch of times on this account and my alt account. I'm a 20 year old guy. Ever since my sophomore year in high school I've been severely depressed, have no self esteem, resulting in no confidence, and my social skills are non existent because i stopped talking to other people, i just wanted to die. I told myself I would never find someone who liked me. Always thought i was ugly. just being all around negative. Which cranked up my depressed making everything else worse. So naturally I never got attention from anyone. I'm a kiss-less virgin.Around Christmas time I decided I was sick of being so lonely. Tired of being depressed. And didn't want to think I was ugly anymore. So January 1st i got to work. Started eating better, went on a diet thanks to /r/fasting, started working out, and the hardest part of all, putting myself out there and talking to strangers. I started frequenting /r/socialskills more. and after the first month I had lost 25 lbs! I never felt better in my life. People at work noticed my weight loss and commented on it which made me feel amazing. Telling me how I looked really good. Around the same time I upgraded my fashion sense. Bought new pants, shirts, jackets, and shoes that i wouldn't normally wear. I used to wear only black. Now i have colors, Blue, Red, Brown, Light Grey. And for the first time in my life I felt, and looked great! My abilities to talk to strangers got slightly better. I managed the courage to talk to a random stranger and get her phone number. Nothing ever happened between us. She kept cancelling dates which kinda took a toll on my confidence. I started to feel bad again but i really tried to brush it off.This is around the time I started reading self improvement books, and following the advice. I started picking up minor hobbies, other than sitting in my room playing video games, that could help me in social situations for when i couldn't think of anything to say or do. For anyone interested in that, i took up minor card magic, and playing the guitar. I'm still working on the guitar as I'm not that good but I do love playing it and don't plan on stopping. But anyway...It was still difficult to talk to someone with the intention of having no expectations, when deep down I wanted to be in their company. I wanted their attention. Whether it was being friends with them, or pursuing them as something more. So I decided to sign up for a dating app for the first time. Monday morning I got together my best pictures (I hated taking pictures I think I'm ugly so naturally I don't want to take pictures.) wrote out a bio that described me, who I was, What I enjoy doing, and all that fun stuff. I went on my jolly way going through others profiles, skipping the ones who i didn't think I'd have a chance with, and messaging the ones who seemed cool, or chill, or high match percentages(This was on OKCupid). After a while No one ever messaged back. Then after closing out of the app, about an hour later I get a message that someone liked me AND messaged me first. I decided to check out who it was, and she was pretty cute. her profile was perfect. We have the exact same interest in music, similar hobbies, similar interests all around. We started talking on the app and I stalled a lot. I had no idea what to say the entire time, but she stuck it out. after not knowing what to say for even longer I simply asked what is a perfect date in her eyes. She gave so many answers, a different one for different weather conditions, different kind of moods and all that. Then she just gave me her phone number and told me to text her whenever. I felt so happy! but decided not to call any of the shots while I was feeling this way. so I went off to bed.Next day I ask if she would like to go to this coffee shop in this area that I go to quite a bit because its a nice place to walk, and I know that the coffee shop is an amazing one, that not many people know about. Sadly she declined it because she didn't the area because she had an abusive ex who lived around there so I understood. Rather than just declining she instead declined, and then suggested we go this other place. It was a hookah lounge. I've never been to one before and I'm down to try anything at least once so why not. so we decide a time, and made sure we both knew it was a date. the days leading up to the date we continued to talk, and without really knowing each other she kept me nice names like ,sweetie, Hun, and handsome. I thought it was a little weird but brushed it off. I got more and more nervous the closer the day came. The day of she texted me asking if were still meeting up. She can't drive so I was picking her up at her place. and knowing we were going to be in a confined space for about a 20 minute drive made so god damn nervous. like 10x more nervous than the actual date. Anyway...The time comes around, I made sure to shower, clean up my beard, wear something nice but not formal. I smelled good, looked good, and felt good. I go and knock on her door and she answers. Tells me to come in because she was still getting ready. I waited so awkwardly with her mother and sister in the room. (Yes I introduced myself, I just didn't know what to say.) after leaving walking toward my car, she said it was nice to finally meet and we had a small awkward hug. I never realized, how short 5'3 really was until i was that close. I'm 6'2. She was so tiny compared to me. We didn't talk too much during the drive. We played music we both liked, and talked about the songs. Finally got to the place and told I have never done anything like this before so i was kinda excited for it. She seemed happy. We go in and the place is full of these lounging areas. like 9 in total. laid back couches around a table, pillows, dim lighting, good music, television, and just a generally chill atmosphere. I was still so nervous though!We go and get our table and I let her pick her seat first so I could sit next to her, and talked about the flavors we could pick from and went with one that was her favorite. I'm sitting there feeling awkward trying my hardest to make conversation. talking about the music in the lounge talking about our lives, how school was blah blah. after smoking the hookah for a while, I got much more comfortable being so close to another person, and talking for so long (I'm very introverted) talked more about our interests and our friend groups. after a while of this, I kept trying to think of ways to touch her, so she knew I was into her more than just a friend. Bless her soul, she eventually made the first move, just a small one, she pressed her head into my shoulder for a few seconds and then lifted it off. I looked at her and smiled, and then didn't do anything. I didn't touch her. still.After more smoking and more talking. She lays her head on my shoulder again but leaves it longer. I told myself this is it touch her. So i just did a small move, and put my hand on her leg. It seems so simple but for me this was such a huge move. after sitting like this for a while, she started to run her fingers along my arm. I wanted to hold her hand really badly. So i thought quickly for this one. I was so proud of myself for thinking of it so fast and then acting on it, rather than talking myself out of it. I just asked "How small are your hands?" as I held my hand that was on her leg up, with my palm facing us. So she just put her hand on mine. Holy fuck her hands were so tiny. I'm a big guy, lets just say, my pinky was bigger than all of her fingers. her palm on mine her fingers only went up to a little past the first joint on my fingers. Her hand were so soft, so I said that. and that my hands are like sand paper. She said I just have man hands. Made me smile lol.After holding our hands up comparing them for a bit i just slid my fingers in between hers and held her hand. Holding hand, with her laying on my shoulder made me feel so good about myself. It reminded me that she was into me, and didn't mind me touching her. I played with her hand as I held it running my thumb up and down her hand so i wasn't too boring. I didn't know what to do. I've never held hands before. She excused herself for a second to go to the bathroom, and I decided to re-position how i was sitting into more of a mix between laying and sitting back. she came back sat real close to me, and we talked a bit more. a good portion of the time there we didn't really talk. we talked here and there but not much. she eventually asked if she could lay on my chest, like more of a lay perpendicular to me and rest her head on my chest. of course I let her. and when she did i wrapped my arm around her midriff and she just held my arm. She knew a lot of the people that worked there, and at one point one of her friends came up and asked if she was sleeping. I looked down and she had her eyes closed, but she wasn't sleeping, when i looked down she looked up at me, and sat up. still leaning on me though. she held my hand and ran her hand up and down my arm. I knew she wanted me to do something to advance. I was nervous. I was comfortable holding her but knowing she wanted me to kiss her, made me kinda scared.I didn't know how to kiss. her friend walked away, and she turned to me. I smiled and said she was really warm, and I was having a great time, even though I'm quiet. She smiled and I felt like it was now or never. I leaned in and slowly closed my eyes and we kissed. My first kiss. I instantly wondered if she knew. and when i pulled away she blushed, and smiled. I said "I'm sorry, I'm a horrible kisser." She said It was nothing to worry about, and smiled again. I moved my hand to her cheek and decided to kiss her again. longer this time. coming back in right after the first one. She slowly opened her mouth and slid her tongue along mine. And for what felt like and eternity we just made out. It felt like it was just us in the building. Everything went quiet. after a while I smiled and pulled away. She said "Nope, not a bad kisser." (probably being nice but i hope not lol) I felt so good about myself. I really liked kissing her. We just stayed there and cuddled more. I loved holding her, and having her hold me. I felt so happy. After a little while. we sat up and talked to the other people that joined our table. after they left her friends joined around us and we all just talked. laughed. They were drinking and offered me some moonshine and beer but i declined. we sat so close to each other. It felt so perfect. I've been missing out my whole life. i had my arm around her and she laid back on me while we all talked. we were there for like 4 hours. before i asked if she wanted to go. we hadn't realized how long we'd been there.Honestly I didn't want to go but I also didn't want to over stay my welcome at this place. It was pretty cheap for how long we were there. Awesome place. I will 100% be going back with or without her. hopefully with. drive back to her place was pretty quiet. we got there and held hands as i walked her back to her place. she unlocked her door and said she had a really great time. and got really close to me. did the same as before. small kisses. then made out for a bit before saying our good nights. told me to text her if i got home safe. texted her and she responded with a paragraph and a half on how much she enjoyed the night and my company, and how i wasn't pushy, or overly sexual. told me she wanted the night to last forever, and felt comfortable enough to fall asleep with me. Of course I responded similarly.It was honestly one of, if not the, best nights of my life. I felt so special, and now she sends me texts asking how i am throughout the day, and even though i'm quiet it absolutely loved it. neither one of us can wait to see each other again.TL;DR:Went on first date ever. 0 experience. Had a great time, Kissed, cuddled, held hands. 10/10 would do it again.QuestionsShe calls me names like Sweetie, and Handsome. I want her to feel reciprocated, what can I do, or say to make her feel the same way?She knows I'm a virgin but I don't think she knows she is the first person I've ever kissed. I kind of want to tell her but not too sure if it should. What are your thought? Tell her? How to bring it up? When to bring it up?She also talks about her son and his father (not really in her life anymore) quite a bit and it makes me a little uncomfortable. How can I either relate to what she's talking about or bring up that it makes me uncomfortable? it doesn't bother me that she talks about them I just have nothing to say because I literally can't relate.Lastly, I really do enjoy talking to her, she's one of the easier people to talk to, brings up topics, asks questions, and just has something to say generally which takes most of the silence away and puts me much more at ease.. But I still feel like I don't contribute enough, my mind is always just thinking "What should I say?" Even though the talking is great. I love just chilling not talking too. How could I propose such a thing, of getting together, to be in each others company, but not really talk? I know I'm weird.Anyway for those of you who stuck around thanks. Hopefully this can inspire some people to stick through the tough times. It can get easier, you just have to be willing to let change happen. via /r/dating_advice