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Mình cũng giống như bạn. Tan vỡ.

Mình cũng giống như bạn. Tổn thương.

Mình cũng giống như bạn. Tự ti.

Mình cũng giống như bạn. Yếu đuối.

Mình cũng giống như bạn. Chênh vênh.

Nhưng chúng mình vẫn đang đứng đây và đã cố gắng hết mình. Dù kết quả ra sao cũng gửi một lời cảm ơn bản thân nhé

Chúng ta cũng chỉ là lần đầu bước đến thế giới này.

Cho nên vụng về, cho nên sai lầm, hay không hoàn hảo cũng không sao cả. Chỉ cần là đừng bỏ cuộc, chỉ cần sống hết mình là được nhé

Chỉ cần bạn còn sống. Mọi thứ đều có thể

Mọi chuyện cứ dồn đến một lúc.

Nhưng khóc rồi đến ngủ quên đến mai dậy cũng có sao đâu.

Vì mình biết chỉ cần thức giấc thấy ngày mai là còn cơ hội để sửa chữa

Bạn lỡ mất một cơ hội không phải là bạn chưa cố gắng đủ nhiều, có lẽ cuộc sống đang muốn bạn kiên nhẫn hơn một chút để một cơ hội phù hợp hơn với bạn sẽ đến trong tương lai

Vậy chúng mình hãy mạnh mẽ lên, cố gắng từng ngày một và kiên nhẫn thêm một chút nhé.

Chào cậu, một người lạ.

Mình bỏ ngỏ blog này hơn một tháng rồi. Một tháng ấy, mình cố gắng hơn rất nhiều. Mình cũng bật khóc nhiều. Vì trưởng thành khiến mình thấy quá khó khăn. Và cũng cô độc nữa.

Mỗi sáng thức dậy, mình luôn tìm cách khiến cho mình bận rộn. Làm việc này việc kia. Vì mình biết mình không quá nổi bật, nên mình chỉ mong mình hôm nay sẽ làm tốt hơn hôm qua mà thôi.

Mình đã chờ đợi những cơ hội. Và nó cũng đến với mình. Thay vì đau lòng vì bị từ chối, mình đã có thể được lựa chọn nơi gắn bó cùng.

Sáng hôm nay là ngày đầu tiên mình bắt đầu hành trình mới với nơi mình đã lựa chọn. Rất vui vì cậu đã trở thành một phần của ngày may mắn này. Cảm ơn cậu đã tới, để lại lời động viên.

Mình cũng mong cậu sẽ có những ngày may mắn, dù nó chỉ nhỏ xíu thôi, giống mình.

[lasincerite]

For the hardest day in my 2022

It's almost 1am at the time I typed these letters.

I've been recently in a wake-up early challenge, which means I am supposed to fall asleep at around 11pm. But I can't. Even when I tried to close my eyes hundreds of times. All the things coming once have made me feel collapsed literally.

Studying in 12-year schools let me enjoy the moments of being an excellent student, with high and admired achievement that helped me to get a large amount of compliments. Especially I finished up perfectly my 12 years by successfully becoming a student of the one-of-the-best economic university, FTU. But everything turned out to be totally different from my expectation, about a bright-light future that I could have embraced.

The first year in the university was deeply horrible. My total score did not meet the score standard of my oriented faculty. I failed all of the clubs that I applied to. I hardly made any friendships in my class. I did not know anyone except my dormmates and my high school close-knit friends. My day circulated with three main points, the class, the dorm, and my ex-bf's rented room. At first, everything was too overwhelming for me to adapt, hence, I had cried for almost a week. After that, I nearly got on well with the things happening, so I did not feel frustrated for a while. I kept living a normal life in a supposed-to-not-be normal environment as FTU.

Coming to the second year, I was still being lonesome when I met some adorable and humorous people in my class. I learnt to be more extroverted, to actively have a conversation with classmates, which helped me to get a perfect but sometimes strict bf. Albeit, I still had nothing for my own. My career future was still vague, whereas someone I knew had been going for some internships in some noted companies. And the most valuable lesson I learnt from this year was I am the kind of person who quickly gets bored and easily gives up. I'm fear of confronting difficulties and problems, just because I always make excuses that I'm afraid I cannot get the work done well.

I am now third-year student. Still have nothing in my hands. The only thing that I determined to achieve most is the highest GPA in my ability. But the harder I tried, the worse the results I have been receiving, which is the reason why I cannot sleep right now. I remembered all the times and efforts I put into those subjects, all the grey matters and the elaborateness I contributed to every test. But everything seemed collapsed in my mind when I continuously received the really terrible results of those subjects. I've been desperate. I tried to think positively, but I was impotent to do that since these things happened so many times, which I can not overlook as I did previously. I feel like I was betrayed by some invisible things.

It's just the 6th day of the new year, but I have to bust out crying all night. I hate this feeling a lot bc it always makes me exhausted whenever I wake up in the morning. But I don't know what to do now. I am just able to look at nowhere in my room, clearing all the tears in my eyes and wondering myself whether I deserve to get all these things in a coincidence.

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For the moment that I'll be deeply exhausted on the rainy days,

I've desired to change myself a lot since I realized I did not satisfy with what I was possessing. The first time I thought of doing something for myself, just to escape from the stagnant life, was one year ago. Everything seemed to be much better than in the past. But recently, I've continued wondering myself, whether I am pretending to be better, or I am truly enjoying what I've got.

The conflicts in our mind always trigger, at good or bad, it can either help improve ourselves, or sink us into the swamp of continual desperation. So am I. I've been trying so much to figure out who I am, "what I truly desire", what deeds I want to make progress at the time being most, bla bla bla. This results in a lot of conflicts floating in my head for months. Finally, beyond bearing, I am staying in here, facing up with my own issues and finding the way to address those.

I remember the time I saw myself in the mirror, staring at the body that I’d forgot to take care of. Surprisingly, I discovered that it was a novel shape that I had never dreamed about. I made it. Until now, I am still proud of myself that I had enough encouragement to start each first set in the workout program.

I remember the time I found numbers, formulas, and syntaxes in Stata much more enchanting than I thought. I started to unearth its mysterious patterns, and it continuously enticed me to break it into pieces more day by day. Afterward, I kept learning, reading, and understanding what is happening in this field.

I remember the time I opened up my heart, and my mouth to get more conversations with classmates. I had been afraid of the crowd for a long time, that's the reason why I was still lonesome in the midst of numerous peers in university. So, I got more relationships, appreciating every moment that paid the wave to me on a daily basis. Furthermore, fortunately, I won a jackpot for my student's life, a comprehensive soulmate, far from Ha Noi for 0.18 thousand kilometers.

Because of those excellent feelings of deeply savoring, in the future, hopefully, I can overpass the borders between success and failure, regardless of fast or slow. Even when being lost, just keep calm, deliberate all the things, and understand that

"Everything takes time. So don’t have to take a butterfly in your stomach."