#this reminds me of the time they dressed my peers and I (many many years ago) as ancient Egyptians which is still bad and hurtful

[wannabe-all]

God I can't believe this. Carnival is approaching here and of course kids dress up in costumes, guess what costume have the teachers picked this year. AFRICAN TRIBES. LIKE DUDE WHAT THE FUCK YOU PIECE OF SHIT, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!?!?! Oh, and that's not the worst part, THEY ARE GOING TO MAKE THEM DANCE AND SING. Dance and sing african songs (I don't know which, I don't even know what tribe they want to use as a base but hell no) I can't believe it, well I can but it's still indignant. I am not black nor come from a tribe but I'm an immigrant in this country and I have faced my own little struggles regarding my cultural background and identity (obviously I can't compare with what POC have to face, this isn't about me) honestly if my culture was butchered and used like a costume I'd commit manslaughter

I just want this to be used as a reminder that culture, that traditional clothes from other places and cultures, that traditional dances and songs are NOT A COSTUME, THEY ARE NOT FOR FUN OR TO WEAR TO ONE EVENT AND EVEN LESS TO MOCK THEM.

People from all cultural backgrounds and races are more than invited to comment and state what they think (go ahead please). Make your own posts and revindicate this.

Carnival is coming

[justawritterwithideas]

law in pink | s.r

♡ next part ♡

summary: when the BAU needs an extra helping hand, Washington decides to send the best of the best, but what they didn't expect was to see... pink.

warnings: a bit of stereotypes, beyond that a bit of comedy and fluff. there may be mistakes in writing because I wrote it too fast :(

this story is spencer reid (season 7) x ssa elle woods!reader

words: 1,649 words.

a/n: elle woods from legally blonde comes to my mind constantly because is one of my favorite movies, so I wanted to make a mix called "ssa elle woods"; I hope you like it and you can understand the idea of reader as elle woods, I also hope I didn't portray it wrong and that it will be misunderstood T T

The BAU needed a hand with the rising crime wave, so, straight from Washington they sent the best of the best from their office.

And of course Penelope had to investigate.

According to her research, you had graduated from Harvard with honors and had given the honorary alumni speech at your class graduation. In addition, you were a part-time Harvard professor of Political Theory during the fall and part of a prolific group of researchers in your Washington office, which had the highest rate of successfully resolved cases in the last 5 years.

In addition, you had achieved on your LSAT a score of 179 out of 180 points.

Something inside Penelope reminded her a little of her friend, Spencer Reid, in you.

But what she didn't expect to see when she looked you up on the interwebs was the fashionista and family friendly life you had. The way your apartment was decorated with a pretty pink aesthetic, your outfits videos that reached millions of views and your day to day routines were the mantra of many girls, being all perfectly edited.

With that and more, anyone would think that your job was not to be a federal agent, but an influencer.

Penelope was already smelling perfume from her computer, and that made her more than eager to meet you.

It was seeing one just like her in front of her screen.

You were the perfect candidate to be her new best friend.

The clacking of your heels and the smell of your Chanel perfume filled the entire BAU office, causing the complicit glances of all the workers who were there.

"Have you seen Barbie yet?" "Is the model missing?" "What about her? Maybe she's a lost intern. First-timer problems."

Everyone was making comments you'd heard more than once in some police office, maybe it was the way you dressed didn't go along with the aesthetic they had or how feminine your attire might be, but that's who you were and for a couple of comments about your appearance and the stereotype they had they weren't going to sour your day.

"Excuse me, are you looking for someone?"

You turned to see a tall, dark man, who was watching your outfit from last season's Prada fit you to perfection.

"Oh! Finally someone nice." You commented with a smile. "Yes, I'm looking for Agent Aaron Hotchner."

"He's my boss, would you like help finding his office? I can help you."

"That would be great, thank you very much..."

"Agent Morgan, Derek Morgan."

"It's a pleasure, Agent Derek. I'm Y/N, nice to meet you."

You didn't like to introduce yourself officially as an agent, it made you look rather intimidating if you did, and that was what you didn't want.

It wasn't a long walk to the wooden door which was adorned by a plaque with the name of the person you were looking for.

"This is it, you come for a case? Any family members involved?"

"No, I'm coming to help. Thank you very much, by the way."

You gave him one last smile before knocking on the door, hearing a "pass" from inside.

"Who was the girl you were escorting, Derek?" Emily watched the man reach them, peering curiously inside Hotch's office.

"Her name is Y/N, she said she was coming to help, but... I don't know, she doesn't look like someone coming to help, maybe she's a witness."

Spencer's eyes scanned the situation, trying to conclude who the mystery woman inside his boss's office was about, but coming up with nothing on the spot. Like his friends, they were all searching for an answer to the abiding doubt in his head.

Who exactly was that girl and why had she said that? She didn't seem like a person whose job was an office job, but not one that was very risky either.

But before they could say anything, Aaron came out of the office with his ever-serious face.

"Meeting in 5" was the only thing he announced, so the group took heed and went to the place.

Once inside the office, Penelope found herself with her dear friends, who were trying to figure out the causes of the recent meeting.

"You don't know Pen either, do you?" J.J. was the first to speak.

"No idea, Hotch just asked me to be here."

"Just like everyone else." Rossi replied, settling around the round table with his coffee cup.

The conversation didn't last long when Hotch entered the boardroom.

"Good. I know there's no case yet or apparent reason to get them together first thing." Hotch began. "But as you may know, the last couple of months have seen an increase in crime for the BAU, which is exactly why we've been given extra funding to bring an extra agent onto the team."

Sounds of excitement came from everyone's mouths.

"So I've been contacting old colleagues, who recommended the best of the best. So they've transferred an agent from Washington to help us."

"Boy, they must be desperate." Derek's comment drew a few chuckles.

"I'd like to introduce you to the SSA, Y/N Woods."

Everyone's countenance changed to one of surprise when they saw you walk in, smiling in the friendliest way possible.

The same girl who looked like a model fresh off a runway was the newest member of the BAU.

"It's nice to meet you all, I hope we can work well together." You set your Prada bag to the side, being able to scan each of the members quickly.

"Woods, this is SSA Emily Prentiss, Derek Morgan, Jennifer Jareau, David Rossi, dr. Spencer Reid and our technical analyst, Penelope Garcia."

"Hey, I know you." You commented in the direction of Garcia, who was smiling politely. "You were the girl who commented on my recipe for the vegetarian tacos."

"Yes! They looked exquisite."

"Thank you very much, I hope they were helpful. We need to be a little more conscientious with our four-legged friends."

Spencer didn't know if he was dazzled by the whiteness of your teeth or the warm way you had entered into trust with Penelope with a simple recipe.

"Woods, Garcia. You'll have time to talk."

"I'm sorry, sir." They both replied at the same time.

"Fine, I'll go prepare the case, Garcia come with me."

They both walked out of the meeting room, leaving you alone with the rest of your new group of colleagues.

"I didn't know you were an agent." Derek was the first to break the silence surrounding them, causing you to turn in his direction.

"I didn't mean to mention it, I'm not a person who usually blurts it out just like that on the first interaction. You never know what kind of person a stranger is." You commented before you could look at him again. "No offense."

"No problem."

"From Washington, right?" Your gaze went to the blonde, who was watching from her position with a warm smile.

"That's right, even though I'm from California but I moved to Massachusetts after getting into Harvard, and then to Washington when I got an opening in the federal office there. So I'm from here, there and over there, but I'll always be a California gurl." A chuckle came out of your mouth after making a reference to the Katy Perry song, bringing your hands to your sides.

"Harvard? What did you study?" Spencer looked more and more interested.

"Law." You commented offhandedly. "I actually studied Fashion Merchandising at UCLA with a 4.0 GPA. But I wanted to prove myself and decided to get into Harvard Law."

"Switching from Fashion Merchandising at UCLA to Harvard Law is a big jump, how much did you get on your entrance exam?" Rossi asked.

"179."

Everyone's surprised face made an impression on you.

"What, like it's hard?" your eyelashes fluttered softly, before you remembered what you were holding as a "peace offering". "By the way, I made cookies yesterday for being the first day and making a good impression." Your hands went to your bag, pulling out a heart-shaped tupperware. "They're lavender and butter, it's a recipe I read on a fairly well known blog forum, they say Paris Hilton gets her recipes from there."

You held out the tupper to each of them to take out a cookie, leaving it on the table in case they liked to take out more.

"If they like more, just pull out. There's enough for everyone." A little smile tugged at your mouth. But before you heard any response from either person, the catchy ringtone of Gwen Stefani's "Rich Girl" interrupted any culinary criticism. "Excuse me..." Your hand went for your phone, which didn't surprise others by being pink, and you left the room letting out a "Woods" as you answered.

"This is new." Derek said.

"And delicious." Emily took another bite of her cookie.

"She's different than what we usually know." Rossi looked at the rest, taking a second cookie out of the tupper. "But I don't mind at all, in fact, I think new always comes in good."

"True, it's always good to have someone new and with a different vibe."

The group turned to look at Reid, who was holding the cookie with his right hand. The young man wasn't usually one to blurt out a comment, just like that, least of all referring to a girl.

"Oh kid, you find her attractive." Derek was the first to smile in amusement.

"What, no." The voice in a higher pitched tone than normal was what gave Spencer away.

"Spencer likes Y/N." J.J annoyed, walking out of the office laughing along with Emily.

"That's not true!"

"See ya, lover boy." Derek commented along with Rossi, who was gently patting his shoulder with a knowing smile.

And so it was that Spencer was left in the meeting room with his cheeks as pink as his new co-worker's heels.

♡ next part ♡

If you like it, don't forget to like and repost it.

a lot of love, alme. ❀

[bvbygrl-writes]

Trick or Treat

Pairing: Stu Macher x Reader x Billy Loomis

Word Count: 3.5k

Summary: It's Halloween and you find yourself experiencing both a trick and a treat.

A/N: As usual I didn't proof read. I know people wanted a part two to Wrong House but this unfortunately is not that. I offer this as consolation. There will be no part two of this one either. 18+ so minors and accounts without age dni or I'll block you.

Warnings: dubcon, mentions of blood and a dead body, painal, double penetration, dacryphilia, roughness, use of the pet name bunny, dark themes, just absolute sinfulness

The Senior Halloween Bash was something people started preparing for months in advance, as it was a big honor to attend. And, despite the fact that a string of murders was happening in the area, that was not enough to kill the hype for the party. Well, it was enough for (Y/n) but not enough for her best friends who were not going to let her get out of going to another party. Plus, as they had reminded her at least one hundred times, she had promised she’d go.

“I’m not sure how practical this outfit is.” (Y/n) remarked, grimacing as she snapped the fishnets against her skin. The entire costume was uncomfortable, tight, and unbearably itchy. The most form fitting thing she had ever worn was a tank top and even then, she never left the house in them. Going from flannel to the Easter Bunny’s Mistress was not going to be easy to adjust to. The feathers cuffs on the gloves were driving her insane already, causing her to scratch at her arms aggressively. Molly swatted her hand, glaring at her overly dramatic friend.

“Come on, (Y/n/n), it’s not that bad! Plus you look super hot. It’s one night. Let’s live a little.” she whined out, pouting as she leaned over the girl’s shoulder in the mirror. (Y/n) observed their appearances. Molly had dressed as a beer tavern maid and Toni, the quietest of the three, was a sexy pirate, her hook hand doubling as a flask which most certainly would need to be refilled before they left. 

“Living is exactly what I’m worried about. If the killer is at the party, I won’t be making it five steps in these damn Barbie pumps!” (Y/n) huffed out. She held onto the vanity as she stood up, her ankles wobbling. “I can’t even walk, how do you expect me to last all night?” Molly simply ignored her complaining, fluffing her hair up a little. The (h/c) looked down at the smell of rum under her nose. Toni’s plastic hook was opened at the top as she tipped the remaining amount of liquid towards her friend's mouth.

“I think you need this a little more than I do.” Toni slurred her words slightly, giving her friend a lazy smile. (Y/n) shook her head, pushing the hook back towards her.

“Someone’s gotta be sober enough to drive and considering you’ve had half a pint of rum and Molly took an edible half an hour ago, that really only leaves me,” she took a moment to take in her very pink appearance once more, sighing as she grabbed the keys from the top of Molly’s dresser on the way out, “Let’s get going before I change my mind.”

The party was in full swing at Shane’s mansion. Despite the fact he had been out of high school for four years, he still insisted on hosting the party at his place every year. For free booze, free food, and such a nice pad, nobody really complained. He got to smash girls who were freshly eighteen and they got a place to party with their friends. It was a win all around. 

It had only been fifteen minutes and (Y/n) already found herself separated from the girls she had come with. Toni had gotten whisked away by some girl in a Cat Woman costume and Molly…well, she was gone before they had even made it through the back door. The pain in her feet was becoming unbearable and unfortunately, there was no place that looked optimal enough to sit. The couch was filled with her half naked peers, making out with one another. The loungers outside were more or less in the same position.

Grabbing a slice of pizza from one of the many open boxes, she made her way upstairs, the music growing quieter as she made her way down the long corridor. Her eyes landed on the set of double doors at the end, a large ‘OFF LIMITS’ sign plastered on the front. To socialize or to lock herself in one of the only unoccupied rooms? The choice was not too hard to make. Carefully, she looked both ways before hobbling towards the double doors, opening them without a second thought.

The bedroom was massive and from the decor choice, she assumed it belonged to Shane’s parents for the rare times they found themselves home. A large king size bed with a lush comforter set on a rounded platform against the wall. On the other side of the room was a black leather couch, what she hoped was a fake bear rug, and an unlit fireplace. Taking her shoes off, she let out a relieved groan as she kicked them to the side. “Hello, sweetheart.” she purred at the empty bed, sprinting up the small steps before throwing herself onto it, stomach up. She began to make snow angels, the soft fleece making a swishing noise as she did so.

However, she couldn’t fully enjoy herself. There was a dripping noise coming from the ensuite that was driving her up the wall. Sighing, she reluctantly threw her legs over the side of the bed. “Rich people. Who doesn’t check their appliances before going on vacation?” she scoffed, shaking her head as she opened up the bathroom door. Her hand searched the side for a light switch until she felt a bump under her gloved fingers. Flicking it, she let out a horrified scream. Blood covered the walls and floor. In the tub, she recognized the girl. Jessica from her AP English class. Her curly hair was tousled and ratty, eyes wide open. Whatever she had last seen absolutely terrified her from her permanent shocked expression. Trailing her eyes down, (Y/n) could saw the dripping was a result of the blood running down her neck to the tips of her fingers, dribbling down into a pool of crimson on the floor.

(Y/n) felt sick to her stomach. It was taking everything in her to not pass out, throw up, or hell, even do a combination of both. With a hand over her mouth, she slowly began to back out of the door. She couldn’t bear to look at this any longer. She had to call the cops! Her steps were suddenly interrupted from a wall that wasn’t there before. A warm, breathing wall. A strong arm wrapped around her torso, holding her in her spot.

“Where do you think you’re hopping off to, little bunny?” The gravelly voice said in a humorous tone that she found to be extremely inappropriate given the circumstances. Her breath hitched in her throat as she began to stutter nonsensical words, begging her brain to piece together some english.

“I-I won’t tell anyone! Please just- just let me go!” she stuttered out, her voice cutting in and out in fear. The arm around her middle shifted, the hand splaying across her torso. Her legs began to tremble as a pair of lips trailed down her neck before pausing at her ear.

“Now where’s the fun in that, hm?” he chuckled. The strange man loosened his hold some, beginning to walk backwards with her. Her eyes flickered to her heels only a bit away from the two of them. Should she risk it? If he was the one responsible for the mess in the bathroom, chances are he was armed and more than capable of using his weapon. But if she didn’t try, would her fate still be the same? ‘Focus, (Y/n). You only have one shot.’ Without waiting a moment more, (Y/n) dropped her weight to the ground, quickly shimming across the carpeted floor. His arm gripped her leg, dragging her closer to him causing her to scream, jabbing the heel into the space between his neck and shoulder. The man groaned, falling back onto the ground.

 “Fuck!” he screamed out. Turning towards the door, a man with brown hair stood in front of the doorway. He had on a cloak and what you assumed was fake blood. (Y/n)’s eyes widened as she recognized him. Billy Loomis, a boy she had many classes with. He usually wasn’t very talkative but he was very helpful, always letting her borrow his notes when she missed school.

“Billy!” she exclaimed, wrapping her arms around him as she managed to scramble up from the floor. “Thank god, you’ve gotta help me! There’s a girl dead in the bathroom!” (Y/n) wailed out. Billy stayed silent, wrapping an arm around her waist. His expression was blank as he looked down at her. Confusion overtook the girl as she looked up at him. “Billy? We need to get help!” her fear rose to another level as he began to laugh, using his free hand to move a piece of hair from her face.

“Surely you didn’t think that was a one man job, Bunny. Come on, I know you’re smarter than that.” he cooed out in a faux sympathetic tone. (Y/n) felt her whole body shaking and if it wasn’t for Billy’s firm grip around her, she surely would’ve fallen to the ground. But, it wasn’t as if her current position was any better. Using his teeth, Billy pulled off his glove, caressing her cheek with a calloused hand before turning her around to face the other man. A gasp fell from her lips, another one of her peers, Stu Macher. The blonde was now standing, massaging the bruised spot where she had attempted to stab him. The severity of the situation was now looming over her. She was trapped in a room at a loud party, where no one would hear her screams, with the killers responsible for all the deaths that had occurred in the past month. “Since you’ve already gotten the trick, it’s only fair you get the treat too.”

“I-I’d hardly consider murder to be a treat.” she stuttered out. Both men looked at each other, sinister cackles leaving their mouths. Stu marched over to her, tilting her head up towards him.

“We’re not gonna kill ya, Bunny. But I don’t doubt you’ll be screaming like we were!” he exclaimed in his gravelly tone. (Y/n) found herself relieved until she realized what he meant. They were planning to have their way with her and if she was honest, she wasn’t exactly opposed to the idea. Having sex with two of the hottest guys in senior year versus being brutally murdered like Jessica had? She’d choose the first any day. Jessica would get her justice but, it wouldn’t be from her. She was dragged from her thoughts as Billy’s large hands began to toy with her breast over her bodysuit.

 Her eyes flit close, lips parting as a soft moan fell from her lips. She could hear Stu growl before feeling his soft lips on hers, catching her off guard. She quickly reciprocated, allowing him to lead the kiss as he began to violate her mouth. The feeling of his tongue piercing was new and foreign, making the intoxicating motions of his tongue even more sinful. The blonde grabbed her hand, moving it to the tent present in the front of his pants. If his bulge was any indicator of the size, she was surely in for a treat. Stu’s hand traveled to the crotch of her bodysuit, massaging her cunt over the velvety fabric, rippling a muffled whine from her lips. The wetness grew, leaving a dark mark where his hands were working magic. He pulled away from her lips, his eyes focusing in on it. Her face grew warm with embarrassment. Had she always gotten worked up so easily or was the danger she was in adding to her arousal? Billy gripped her jaw, forcing her to look down as Stu toyed with her.

“Don’t get shy now, Bunny. You weren’t when you made the decision not to wear any underwear with this little get up.” Billy said in a disapproving tone. His free hand moved to pull the front of her suit down some, revealing her breast to the two of them. Stu whistled some before flicking her hardening nipple on her left breast.

“You’re so reactive! I bet it won’t take much to get ya to cum will it, Bunny?” He commented before latching onto her breast. A shuddery breath left her mouth at the sensation. The ball of his cold tongue piercing swirling around her nipple with hunger. Billy removed his hand from her face, trailing it down her chest before engulfing her remaining breast with a firm grip. 

He massaged it in a circular motion before pinching her hardened bud. (Y/n) moaned, resting her weight back on Billy’s chest. Reaching her free hand back, she began to play with the short hairs at the nape of his neck, giving Stu’s now fully erect cock a firm squeeze. The blonde growled, tugging on her nipple gently, sending a wave of pleasure to her throbbing clit. He pulled away from her chest with a pop before dropping to his knees, spreading her legs. She watched as his hands ripped at the fabric, leaving a large hole in her tights and bodysuit. His left hand massaged at her clit slowly in contrast to his right hand which roughly shoved two thick digits into her sopping hole. (Y/n) winced at the intrusion, the pain short lived as his fingers expertly massaged at her walls. A string of high pitch noises left her as he scissored his fingers inside her, stretching her out.

Billy tilted her head towards him, taking her into a sloppy open mouth kiss. His tongue overtook hers with ease as he gripped her throat roughly, leaving her with little air. He nipped at her bottom lip before pulling away, looking into her eyes intensely. She felt like a captured prey and at the moment, she technically was. But, even as he wrapped his hand around her neck firmly, she couldn’t find it in her to care. “I want your eyes on me as you cum. Don’t you dare look away.” he commanded in a deep tone. (Y/n) nodded to the best of her ability, staring into his dark eyes. They examined her face carefully, taking in every flinch and quiver of her lips. His arm tightened around her waist as her knees began to buckle. With every thrust of Stu’s fingers, she could feel herself growing closer.

Her (e/c) eyes struggled to stay open as he began to suck at her clit, his tongue licking up every bit of arousal that spilled from her. Stu’s fingers disappeared into her deeper, curving upwards until he hit that spongy spot inside of her. (Y/n)’s eyes widened, her lips parting as another loud moan ripped from her. “There it is!” Stu growled out before delving his head back down, his fingers applying more pressure to her g-spot as his lips sucking on her clit with an entirely new level of strength. 

The contrast of his fast working tongue combined with the languid feeling of his fingers massaging her spot was enough to send her over the edge. Her legs began to shake violently, labored breaths causing her chest to rise and fall like crashing waves. Billy’s grip on her throat tightened, reminding her of his words. She struggled greatly with keeping her eyes open as pleasure washed over her, the knot in her stomach unraveling completely. Tears of pleasure streamed down from the intensity of it all, her lips quivering as she whimpered pathetically. She had never experienced an orgasm so intense, so prolonged before. Her pussy was unbearably sensitive, a new feeling forming in the pit of her stomach. Billy smirked, wiping her tears with his thumb before bringing it to his lips. Her eyes widened as a gush of clear liquid began to gush from her in a long stream, soaking Stu from below her. Billy took his eyes from her to watch, groaning at the sight, her cunt continuing to squirt. Her eyes clenched shut as she screamed in pleasure. She was already reaching her limit and they hadn’t even gotten to fucking her yet. The flow came to a gradual stop, her body jolting in after shocks as she panted. 

The girl felt her body being lifted, the feeling of the soft bed returning under her. Billy slapped her face, her eyes flying open in alarm. “You’re not tapping out already. The fun hasn’t even started yet.” he teased. (Y/n) groaned, propping herself up on shaky elbows. The two men were now nude from the waist down, their cocks fully erect. Her eyes followed Billy as he climbed onto the bed behind her, pulling her towards him with ease. His cock was wedged between her open legs, giving her a closer look. What he lacked in length, he certainly had in girth. “It’s a shame that tail on your ass isn’t a plug because,” he pushed her forward, ripping the tail from the back of her bodysuit, leaving a clean hole where her butt was, “You’re really gonna wish it was.” Before she could climb away, he pulled her back into his lap, aligning the tip of his cock with her rear. Her eyes widened at the feeling of his thick head pressed against her virgin hole.

 Any protest she had fell onto deaf ears as the tip of his cock pushed in. He was nowhere near fully in yet but the burning was so painful. It felt as if he was splitting her in half, forcing his thick cock into her unexplored hole. Her throat was growing raw as she screamed, only seeming to egg him on. She was so out of it that she completely missed Stu’s presence, holding her legs up as he aligned himself with her front. Her teary eyes shot open as his cock slid into her cunt with one swift motion, his head thrown back in pleasure. Billy was now fully situated inside of her, the burning of her ass a bit more dull but still present. She could feel them both pressed against the thin wall separating them, the feeling was indescribable. And despite the pain, she couldn’t recall a time she had felt so much pleasure.

“You’re so pretty when you’re screamin’, Bunny. Couldn’t resist shoving my cock into you.” Stu said through gritted teeth, folding her legs back as he began to thrust into her. Billy wrapped his arms around her waist with a bruising force, holding her up just an inch above his lap as he began to pound her at an assaulting pace. Her eyes rolled to the back of her head, tongue lolling out of the side of her mouth lazily. She was aware she was babbling, but her brain was completely disconnected from her body. Stu pulled his cock mostly out before slamming back into her, the three of them moaning in unison. With each movement, their cocks brushed against the thin lining of her walls, sending a volt of pleasure straight to her clit. The blonde leaned over her open mouth, spitting directly into her mouth. She began to choke, gasping for the air that seemed to no longer be present in the room.

“Don’t be-be rude, Bunny. Swallow it like a good girl. Here, I’ll help you.” Billy said, sticking his fingers down her throat. (Y/n) gagged, swallowing around his fingers. The brunette growled, looking at her with hungry eyes. Stu whimpered, his hips stuttering a bit as he looked upon, his cock twitching inside of her.

“Oh fuck!” he whined out. He was close, but he refused to be the first one to come. Moving one of his hands, he began to rub at the girl’s clit roughly, his thrust growing more sloppy. (Y/n) screamed around Billy’s fingers, her eyes rolling back into her head. Her holes began to pulsate around their cocks, causing them to let out a string of swears. “She’s close, Bill.”

“You’re almost there, Bunny. Make a mess on our cocks. Be a good fucking girl!” and right on cue, (Y/n) felt herself snap. Her pussy began to gush around Stu’s cock as she sobbed, her mascara running down her face. She began to thrash in their hold, rabid speaks of tongue flying out of her mouth. Billy removed his fingers from her mouth, choking her harshly as he buried himself deep in her ass, hot streams of cum filling her to the brim. Stu came only a millisecond after, burying his face in her chest as he painted her walls white, collapsing on top of the pile. Their cum spilled out of her, making its way onto the fleece blanket. None of them noticed as they panted, two pairs of hands trailing along her body. 

Stu pulled himself up on shaky arms, hovering above her. (Y/n) looked up at him through blurry vision as he gently moved her hair back, adjusting the pair of ears on her head.

“How’s that for a treat?”

[ghcstao3]

Ghost never really learned how to properly tie a tie.

He never had reason to. Never had a father that would teach him, either. And when it comes to formal dress after joining the military, he’d always fidget and tug and prod at knots until they looked right, whether or not they were done properly.

He’s tried looking up tutorials, sure, but it’s just… overwhelming as to how many ways ties can be knotted. So he never bothers. Just does his best to pretend like he knows even when he’s so, so lost.

Because it doesn’t matter.

At least, not until—years down the line—his and Soap’s wedding.

Ghost figures it’s his time to finally learn, then, because it has to be perfect. He can’t mimic a knot for such an important day, just praying for the best, he has to do his tie up properly.

But he can’t.

He tries, over and over, watching videos and looking at picture-by-picture instructions, but he can’t. Ghost gets frustrated, hands trembling more and more every attempt until eventually he just… gives up. Rips off the tie and resigns himself to slumping into the nearest chair, running fingers desperately through hair he’d taken so long to make look nice.

Soap finds him much too close to the start of the ceremony, quick to rush to his side and ask what’s wrong.

Ghost isn’t sure when the tears had started welling, or when his bottom lip had started to wobble. He lets Soap gently guide his hands away from his head, pressing thumbs lightly into open palms.

“You’ll think it’s stupid,” Ghost mutters. His tie is loose around his neck, an irritating reminder of why he’s yet to be ready to meet Soap at the end of the aisle.

Soap smiles softly at him. He looks so handsome, as always—him and his perfectly tied tie.

“I doubt it,” he says, oh-so kindly. “Never is.”

Ghost laughs quietly, the sound shaky, watery. He swallows the lump that threatens to rise in his throat, peering into the comfort of Soap’s eyes to lend him strength as he confesses, “I can’t get my fucking tie right.”

“That’s all?” Ghost nods and Soap sighs, sitting down on his knees, pressing the back of Ghost’s hands to his forehead like an odd sort of worship. “Thank God. Had me worried you were rethinking things.”

"I'd never rethink this, I just—" Ghost takes a shuddering breath. "Fuck, I'm sorry."

"Don't be." Ghost mourns the loss of Soap's warmth as he lets go of his hands. He lifts a hand to drag through Ghost's hair, surely mussing it in a way that looks better than the tangled mess Ghost had probably left it as. "All you had to do was ask for help."

Ghost's gaze falls to the ground as shame burns his ears. "I just didn't want you to think—"

"I'd never think any less of you for not bein' able to tie a tie, Simon," Soap assures him. "There's a stupid amount of ways to do it 'right', anyway. C'mere."

Ghost leans forward enough for Soap to have a comfortable grip on his tie. He watches Soap's face the entire time, the subtle concentration in his expression, though surely he should be paying attention to how he ties the knot instead.

He doesn't move even as Soap has switched to adjusting his collar and smoothing the artificial wrinkles of his dress shirt.

"Pure braw," Soap murmurs. He sits up to capture Ghost in a kiss, sweet and innocent and comforting.

"You're supposed to save that for after the vows," Ghost says once they break apart.

Soap barks out a laugh. "Prude," he teases.

He stands slowly, then, wincing when his knees crack as he gets up. Soap offers out a hand to Ghost, of which Ghost happily accepts.

Soap grins at Ghost, then, bright and blinding and full of love.

"Let's go get married, then, shall we?"

[beautifulqueerexistence]

I remember standing in the bathroom of my Church’s Youth Group meeting at fifteen, hands pushing back my chest to try and imagine an alternative world where it didn’t fill out.

I remember telling my girlfriend at the time how I wanted a reduction, how my back pain was getting worse… but specifically leaving out the fact that my chest felt foreign and detached.

I remember my mom obsessively commenting on my long hair, never letting a day go by where I wasn’t reminded of how beautiful and healthy it was… how my long hair was a gift.

I remember the panic in middle gym class when the group was separated between boys and girls, my heart torn between the two before I even had the words or courage to understand why.

I remember cutting my hair, how many taunts and comments were made. “Such a shame,” I’d be told over and over from girls who envied the length I had freed myself from.

I remember watching the only openly out transgender kid having to walk half a mile across campus to change in the nurse’s office for gym class, only getting to participate in gym for ten minutes before he was forced to walk back to change in time for his next class. I remember how horribly he was treated by my peers, who called it his “walk of shame,” and promising myself that I’d never let myself be put in that position.

But most of all, I remember looking in the mirror after several weeks of isolating quarantine. The sting of my church’s rejection still fresh and the abandonment I felt from God. I remember begging to be fixed, to have this suffocating, confusing feeling torn out of the body that was supposed to be mine. I remember tracing over every little arbitrary gender rule, tearing through my closet of leggings, dresses, and skirts, unable to find a single article of clothing that actually felt like mine. I remember the bittersweet feeling of finishing a theatrical production, saying goodbye to the character I was expected to embody, and feeling that same nostalgia for the girl in the mirror before me. I remember suffocating out any piece of me that didn’t suit her role, the expectations people had for her, and feeling as though her very existence contrasted my ability to live. I remember how my life wasn’t my own, rather countless strings pulling me to dance and dress and act the part they all expected me to play. I remember the night I realized that stage was supposed to be mine.

I’ve been on testosterone for two years, and I get top surgery in 5 days. Though I remember the sacrifices I made for her character to thrive, I no longer find myself grieving who she could have been. Instead, I see a clear stage, ready for whatever set I build, whatever story I wish to portray. For the first time in a long time, the mirror in front of me no longer shows the girl I gave up 18 years for… but the person they were always meant to grow into. Though I now face my own version of the walk to the nurse’s office, I see now that his choice was one of bravery, not shame. He represented a courage I had not yet found, and planted a seed in me that knew all of this was arbitrary and pointless. Because he had chosen himself to be visible, I would eventually go on to set my weights down and join his stride. I don’t know where he is now, and I don’t know what lays in his walk… but I’m forever grateful he was bold enough to show himself for people like me.

[cancerian-woman]

klonnie au|inspired by the haunted mansion: For over a thousand years Klaus has loved and mourned his former wife, Bonnie. He has searched and discarded many companionships, but no one has been able to love and understand him like Bonnie did. Klaus has forcibly adapted to life without her, but on his journey to break his curse, he sees Bonnie following around a certain doppelgänger. He knows in his heart that Bonnie has returned to him and he's going to need his siblings' help getting her back.

An excerpt from this fic:

Bonnie set her skepticism aside as she sat her duffle bed on the large vintage ottoman of the Mikaelsons spare bedroom. Rebekah planned her birthday sleepover for her fellow cheerleaders weeks ago. This “holiday” was extra special to Bonnie’s physics partner, as her older brothers would be turning home from their business trip. While Rebekah has only been at Mystic Falls High for four weeks, Bonnie oddly trusted her like a sister.

The little witch was the first to arrive at the Mikaelson mansion. With whispers of magic in the house Bonnie couldn’t help but investigate. As a newbie witch, she wanted to find any source of new information possible. Her bedroom for the night was vintage styled and decorated with vibrant flowers in every corner. The smell of citrus hit her nose and she couldn’t be more pleased.

Bonnie did a twirl in the mirror admiring Rebekah’s choice in silk nightgowns and headbands. The witch saved herself some preparation time by pinning up her curled hair. Her peer did inform her since she was there first, she got to choose the red gown specifically. When was the last time her life was centered around an enjoyable night and not the struggles of being supernatural?

“You look beautiful,” Rebekah grinned, and stepped into the bedroom. “I could not imagine my birthday without you. You have been the kindest friend.”

Bonnie quickly accepted the hug. She felt a sense of magic within Rebekah but trusted she’d tell the truth on her own terms. Whether that be as a witch, werewolf or vampire. This girl was kind and it wouldn’t be fair though her friends suggested otherwise to call her out. Besides, Bonnie hadn’t even met the rest of the family. The cheer squad’s first night at the Mikaelsons wasn’t going to be filled with drama, not on Rebekah’s day.

“Wouldn’t miss your birthday for the world,” Bonnie replied, giving Rebekah an extra squeeze. “I can help you set up.”

Rebekah laughed at that. “Nonsense, darling, I can handle everything. Take a tour of my home.”

“Are you sure?” Bonnie asked, with her eyes wide. “What if I helped set the tables, arrange blankets or even do the food?”

“Yes, do not worry in my home you are not a guest here,” Rebekah said, sternly with a sigh beginning to turn away. The teen wasn’t even finished applying her makeup-and was still dressed in her bright robe. The rolls were just beginning to slip in her blonde hair. “Just shout if you need me!”

Bonnie checked her phone Caroline and Elena would be running late for different reasons. The others on the squad were on their way or running behind leaving Bonnie to explore on her own.

The Mikaelson manor sent shivers down Bonnie's spine. The place felt like a magical hotspot, giving her goosebumps all over. While she admired the clever vintage-themed designs of the family, she found their home to be dangerously confusing to navigate.

Bonnie decided to go to the nearest room with a light seeping through under the door. She gasped, as she accidentally stepped into a private art space.

The woman in the painting reminded Bonnie of herself before she entered the supernatural world: happy, carefree and filled with gratitude. Magic gave this woman joy. She existed across different eras, and Bonnie couldn't help but notice the time periods, which ranged from 1002 to the 2010s. The artist signed himself as Nik M with sentiments on eternal love. The woman through the art had lived through each era, embodying the luxurious fashion trends of Black women.

Bonnie wouldn’t go so far as to call this woman her doppelgänger, but the similarities were striking. They both had green eyes, golden skin, thick dark hair and other common traits like freckles in the Bennett’s. The young witch tried not to dwell on it, but for a moment, she entertained the unsettling thought of being a doppelgänger and shivered at the idea.

The painting that captivated Bonnie the most was of a woman with curly hair obscuring her face, holding her head high as if magic were being used to promote relaxation. Surrounded by a lush garden, she appeared more content than anything else in the world. In fact, in none of these paintings the woman was never down; she was at peace. As Bonnie reached out to touch the painting, she quickly withdrew her hand when the door opened.

“Not everyday I find a beautiful woman in my study,”

This man was unlike any she had ever seen. His dimpled grin and the curls resting on his shoulders caught Bonnie off guard. He had an enticing scent of expensive cologne that hinted at his attention to appearance. Although his shirt and pants were a simple dark henley with jeans, she couldn't help but notice his preference for a chain featuring a butterfly around his neck. Yes, she noticed an English accent similar to Rebekah’s.

“You can call me Nik, what is your name?” Nik asked, holding his hand out for Bonnie. “I am one of Rebekah’s eldest brothers.”

“Bonnie. Bonnie Bennett,” Bonnie said, returning the shake.

Their enclosed hand jolted upon touch and Bonnie quickly pulled away hoping Klaus didn’t notice.

“I thought Rebekah said you wouldn’t be home until later?”

“It is my sister’s birthday, what type of brother would I be without a surprise?”

“Dramatic entrance, for a smart brother.”

“I strive for the element of surprise, my love.” Nik smiled at the compliment.

Never being alone with a grown man before Bonnie’s mouth went dry and she got flustered. She was met at an uncomfortable crossroad. Be herself or do what her friends would do? She chose herself first.

“I can leave,” Bonnie suggested, not knowing how to flirt properly. “I know art can be really personal. I wouldn’t want to disrespect your space.”

“As an artist, explaining my motives is just as important. Would you desire a tour?” Nik questioned, holding his hand out for Bonnie. “There are hundreds perhaps more here. All of my wife.”

Bonnie reluctantly accepted the warm invitation. Their hands jolted and she felt a fiery passion burn the closer she was to Klaus.

“Do you mind if I ask what happened?” Bonnie asked, as judging the photos of the woman framed on his antique desk.

“She was murdered, and before that, we promised eternal love. We wanted our story to be heard for centuries. I use my art to cope with her loss.” Nik sighed, as he traced a photo of the woman in seventies inspired clothing. “Love will never die, it was rather the purest forms of eternal affection.”

“I’m sorry you lost her. The way you remember her is really beautiful, Nik.” Bonnie compliments, and secretly swoons over him. “Did you ever receive justice for her murder?”

Klaus mockingly grinned at that question. “That person will never be heard from again. Tell me, Bonnie, do you ever think it is possible for souls to be connected?”

“Sounds like something out of a movie.” Bonnie said, brushing off the question. Not wanting to reveal her witch status.

“I think some people are aligned by fate. What goes around will return if it is meant to be.” Klaus pauses, and gazes into Bonnie really studying her beauty.

Klaus's throat went dry as he realized that Bonnie was exactly who Rebekah had described: his small, courageous, and daringly beautiful witch who loved him unashamedly. The red silk gown sparked the most enticing thoughts in his mind, and her skin still bore the sweet scent of honeysuckle that he remembered. However, instead of rushing to confess things that might send Bonnie running for the hills, he chose a softer approach.

“You're distracting, my love, would you like to see other pieces of art? The gardens perhaps?”

Bonnie blushed in response. There was something mystical and comforting about the mystical English artist. She’d rather hear stories about a man who loved his wife so much he kept her immortal in time.

“First, I want to know all about the artist and his work dedicated to making his wife immortal,” Bonnie said, looking into Klaus eyes. She might not tell everyone but she too enjoyed a romantic story from time to time!

For a fleeting moment that almost made the witch step-away she believed she saw Amber colored eyes but blue settled back in.

“Who would I be to disagree with a ravishing woman?” Klaus asked, pulling Bonnie closer to him. He wanted to moan at how sweet she smelled.

Bonnie giggled, and rolled her eyes. “Then I want that tour of the gardens and the pool area please? Rebekah is still getting ready.”

“As you wish,” Klaus obliged, and he noticed how Bonnie loved eye contact and physical touch as he explained his motives though she already understood him.

Klaus didn’t need to taste her blood or have a witch perform a spell to understand his wife had returned back to him. Once the time is right, Bonnie too will believe in their love again. His mother and father sought to keep them separated and Klaus will go to the ends of the earth to ensure Bonnie never leaves his life again.

The original vampire is just grateful Rebekah stalled Bonnie as he removed the paintings of her sleeping, jogging, gardening and anything else without her knowledge that would incriminate him too soon.

[failing-to-write-again]

Baby Photos Part 2!

Part 1

Since the lovely asker @lilithram did say to pick between Sakamaki baby photos or reader baby photos, I chose both. While the previous part was less overall fluff and more early relationship I decided to make this one closer to an established relationship. I’m a bit nervous about making the boys ooc so any feedback on parts that are good and in character or those less in character would help me work to tailor my writing.

I worked under the ages proposed by @diabolik-shu-lover from this post.

Shu Sakamaki

Visiting le château de Heinz wasn’t your ideal vacation spot if you were to be completely honest. Unfortunately a major downside to dating a crown prince is how business minded people are going to be about your relationship. Shu had delayed taking you here, sharing his wish to live a more ordinary life until his accession, and even then he still wanted to have a more “normal” relationship. So far your little trip had consisted of a dinner with Shu and his father where he quizzed you on your life, followed by two days of loneliness where Shu was kept away by business of some kind with his father. 

Waking up to day 3 of being alone you elected to at least try to find some evidence of Shu’s childhood you could tease him on. There had to be some silly sailor uniform or ruffled collar from when he was a small Victorian lad. Wandering the halls the castle was a thousand times creepier than the Sakamaki manor had ever been, especially when you were left without a lazy vampire keeping an eye on you. Karl Heinz had requested that his sons not kill you but that was before you began dating the son most likely to be forced into some arranged marriage. It didn’t help that the staff weren’t hidden familiars, they were standing in every room just looking… creepy.

Eventually your exploration landed you in a gallery, paintings decorated the hall with spotlights above each painting. Many seemed very old and depicted pretty women in the castle gardens at night. One of these paintings had a woman you were convinced was Shu and Reiji’s mother. She was under a gazebo in a red dress staring lovingly at someone standing somewhere behind the painting. 

“This must’ve been back when they were all in love before Cordelia.” You mumbled to yourself, turning away and continuing down the hall. You found some more imposing portraits of men, a few being Karl Heinz himself, and some more general landscape paintings. 

After nearly 2 hours of this you found a new hall of all six Sakamaki sons in a series of paintings, VICTORY. It’s always a bit weird when you get obvious reminders of your boyfriend being 387 years old even though he looks like a 19 year old. Seeing paintings of him in severely dated clothes and poses was just bizarre, snapping a picture of him in a wig from the Georgian period was a good form of pay back for his abandonment of you these past few days. There was one painting of him unlike all the others, he looked roughly 3 or 4 and was sat in his mother’s lap with a silver rattled as he peered down at a bundle in Karl Heinz’s lap, the raven coloured hair giving it away as Reiji. He looked so curious and his father looked so happy. He was cute, with blonde curlier locks and a big round face, he looked like any modern day child meeting their younger sibling. Seeing him with eyes so awake and full of life, and no animosity between the two oldest sons of Karl Heinz.

“She kept scolding me for not sitting still.”

Shouting in shock as you turn to see your MIA boyfriend with a shit eating grin on his face at your reaction.

“What’s with that face woman, girlfriend’s are meant to be happy when they see their boyfriend’s not scream like a banshee.” Teasing you as he stepped closer, moving his hands to sit comfortably at your waist. In response you let your head fall with a thud into his chest, wrapping your arm around his back.

“Well boyfriend’s aren’t meant to tell their girlfriend’s they’re going on vacation to then vanish off for days. We never get time together in the manor without your brothers hanging around and now your dad is keeping you busier than you’ve ever been.”

Sighing, Shu buried his nose in your hair  wrapping one arm around your shoulder and another around your lower back huddling you close. “I’m sorry. That guy wouldn’t stop talking about all this protocol and other crap about properly introducing you as my chosen queen. He wanted to rush everything.”

Pulling back just enough to look up eyes wide at what he was saying. Queen, you a queen? Not to mention having to meet more creepy vampires. Sensing some of your unease, Shu smiled.

“Relax, I managed to get him to agree to a much slower schedule, you won’t be rushed off to a ball anytime soon. For now the worst of it will be seeing some property we own and meeting his close advisory staff and my other’s old staff. After I have you to myself for another few months we’re going to graduate first.”

Letting out a sigh of relief you lay your head against his shoulder, staring back up at the painting. “As a kid you were pretty cute Shu.”

“Not as cute as you as a mini ballerina,” he shot back, absentmindedly rubbing little circles against your back as he also stared at the portrait.

“If I do end up as Queen you’re not allowed to marry anyone else, I refuse to deal with the whole situation with your mothers. And you can’t ever let our kids have such a poor relationship like you and Reiji.”

“Not if, when, princess and don’t work yourself up over stupid things. You’re mine, I'm not letting some woman try to take me away ever. Seriously such bothersome thinking.”

Leaning down he gently kissed you, as if you were so delicate and precious. Looking up at blue eyes finally looking awake and closer to that childhood Shu then he had in centuries.

Reiji Sakamaki

“The box I’m looking for is about as big as an envelope, and has a leather strap holding it shut. Let me know if you spot it.”

“Alright, anywhere you’d prefer I don’t look. I don’t want to run into some secret Laito porn stash up here.”

You hear Reiji chuckle at that. “Laito doesn’t come up here, too many spiders. I do not care where you go, we are partners, we agreed no secrets right.”

That made you smile, your relationship with Reiji was the fruit of a long journey of trying to reach an understanding. For a while you were both not fully able to understand each other, and while no relationship is perfect, especially yours, hiccups that would’ve caused serious arguments before were now easier to settle over tea. It felt good to feel like a respected partner.

Looking through the attic for this mystery box was a good time to find mementos to learn more about Reiji. Looking through older books and boxes of clothes or unused houseware most of the items in this portion of the attic seemed unimportant. Reiji focused his search on the opposite side of the room where the ceiling was higher, you were shorter than the 6ft man so were less uncomfortable searching where the roof sloped down. A small dusty window allowed some of the early morning light to stream in. Reiji had begun waking later during holidays to allow you both to have a day that had more sunlight for you. He claimed it was to reduce risk of seasonal depression or vitamin D deficiency, with the added benefit of allowing you both to go to museums and other date locations. Waking at 12am gave you the opportunity to see sunrises daily, and if you were honest the view of your boyfriend in the hazy early morning glow was always a welcome sight. 

“You’re staring.” 

“I see nothing wrong with admiring my boyfriend”

He let a smile sigh pass his lips as he smiled, shaking his head. Looking back down at the stack of cardboard boxes he was rifling through. You pull your eyes away and back to the room around you, you spot something sticking out behind a shelf. Pulling it out you find a handful of photos and a small box. The photos were black and white, Daguerreotypes, on metal sheets. The images showed a younger Reiji taking what looked like test photos. Some were of him, slightly blurred from incorrect technique, others of items. The last photo was much clearer and was of Reiji sitting in a chair with a book in his lap. He must’ve gotten a familiar to take the photo. 

“Hey Reiji can I take these down? I don’t know how to store such photos though.”

Looking up Reiji walked over, taking the photos from you to look through. He picked up a box placing them inside before handing them to you,

“I will have the familiars store them properly and make scans so you can have more stable prints of them. If you wish to have images of me to display however, I would prefer you take more modern photos with both of us.”

Smiling down at the box of photos, Reiji spoke again.

“Smiling over such trivial things as a few photos, you should be harder to please.”

“You’re probably the first man to ever say that Reiji, besides it’s nice to have childhood photos of each other. I only have my locket but what happens when your children ask to see what you looked like as a child?”

“Our children will have plenty of paintings of me to see at my father’s castle, and if we are so lucky your only response will be that they look exactly as you did as a child.” Adjusting his glasses Reiji knelt down and picked up the box you had also pulled out with the photos. Meanwhile as his words set in your face flushed slightly.

“Our children…Reiji you shouldn’t say that stuff so casually. Besides, why would you want them to look like me? I'm human.”

That was not a response he liked, gently lifting your chin with his thumb and pointer finger Reiji looked you in the eye as he spoke. “Our children should be as pretty or handsome as their mother. I’m insulted you think, after all we’ve been through, I have not grown out of the belief that blood is a final decider in terms of superiority. You are superior, you are who I want, you alone are my partner and equal so strong as to be able to hold my heart in your hands. Am I clear?”

Your blush darkens as Reiji flusters you further, you can only nod your head in response to such strong compliments said so earnestly. Smiling Reiji’s thumb gently swiped over your bottom lip before leaning in to kiss you. Reiji always kisses you with the aim to convey all of his feelings for you, as if you will never be able to kiss him again. Moving in tandem you ended up leaning against a shelf with Reiji’s arm pinning you there, your arms holding onto his collar to prevent him pulling away too soon. 

Unfortunately, Reiji has to ensure you take in air so moves back. Opening the box, he removes a key, turning it over in his hands.

“This key is to my father’s laboratory here, he used it when he was visiting us as children. I sealed it off years ago and elected to use my room for my experiments. However, due to the chemicals it is not safe for you to sleep there so they must be moved.” 

“What’s wrong with my room?”

“It is a guest room, I’m not going to sleep every night in a guest bedroom in my own home. No, my room must be altered to fit its needs and to do so I shall reclaim the laboratory as my own to allow you to rest safely.”

All you could do is follow along as Reiji began to return back downstairs, gazing down at the box of pictures. Looking at the sad younger Reiji you couldn’t help but compare him to the cool, confident man he had become.

Ayato Sakamaki

Ayato had demanded you meet him in the garden of the castle that evening, something about having something special to show you. You weren’t sure what to expect really, surprises with Ayato were often either very nice or sweet but messy failures. Breakfast in bed when you’ve never cooked before was a bad idea in hindsight, even he had to admit. Still as the night started to fade into dawn you made your way to the gardens, examining the sights around you as you went. 

The father of the Sakamaki’s had summoned them to return for some festival of sorts. Ayato had been vague in describing it, rather unhappy to be returning. It seemed like some carnival was being set up, you hoped it was a carnival anyway. As you ponder the pros of encouraging Ayato’s competitiveness to win you stuffed toys you eventually reach the garden. Opening the glass doors you see Ayato sitting on a blanket, under the stone gazebo and some candles lit around. He had a few plates of your favourite deserts around as well as takoyaki. He grinned as you approached, arms crossed and pride beaming from his face.

“I set this all up, yours truly is the best boyfriend ever, and I have a present for you.” Pulling out a box with a bow stuck on the lid, he gestured for you to open it. You sat down cross legged, opening the box to reveal a collection of photos. 

Lifting some out you realise these were the photos Ayato had burnt after he had first met you, before you had started dating. They looked untouched. Ayato, not trusting your silence, began to speak again.

“Ore-sama got the familiars to find copies and I had those losers in the tech club at school print them. They couldn't say no to yours truly. Do you like it?”

“Why did you do all this, you threw them into the fire.” Ayato blushed before looking away, a hand on his neck.

“I…felt…bad about making you cry like that. It’s only fun when you cry from my bites, not over that stuff.” 

Your sniffling brought his attention back to you, panic spreading across his face. Pulling you into his lap and holding you close as his brain froze trying to find the best course of action. Your hands rising up to hold his cheeks as you attempted to calm down, a smile on your face.

“It’s ok, they’re happy tears. I’m happy Ayato.”

“Are you sure, don’t lie to yours truly.”

“I’m not, I swear! Thank you Ayato, these photos are important to me.”

Sighing in relief, Ayato leant back letting his head thunk against one of the gazebo pillars. 

“Damn it, you’re not meant to cry when Ore-sama gives you gifts.”

Running his fingers along your back. You began rifling through some of the photos noticing some new additions to the collection. There, between the photos of a younger you were pictures of you and Ayato on various dates. You, completely unaware of the camera while Ayato was looking and seemingly taking each photo. There was also one picture of a painting, it was of three boys with the child on the left resembling a much younger version of your boyfriend. 

“I didn’t know you had any childhood photos of Ayato.”

“It’s the only one, you can’t have a collection of photos without one of yours truly to admire.”

Giggling you sit back leaning against his chest while you both began to enjoy your picnic and company. 

Laito Sakamaki

You were currently facing a big problem, for some reason the 2nd year history department had decided to assign a project discussing your family history…in detail. So you were currently stressed out of your mind trying to figure out how to worm your way out of this one. Laito was covered, his family history well laid out as a royal and all of his ancestors having false human lives, it basically wrote itself. Yet here you were unable to write anything. It’s not that you were necessarily ashamed of your orphan status, and your close companions now also ‘brides’ of the Sakamaki’s were virtually sisters and you could maybe write about them. But people always got weird about orphans, and while you weren’t ashamed to be one by any means, being Laito’s girlfriend let alone a Sakamaki girlfriend involved gossip, it came with the territory. Extra rich boys in a school full of rich kids would always mean they were an aim for many girls and their parents alike, let alone Laito’s colourful past meaning he’d slept with basically any 2nd year heiress he could say a word to. All of them convinced they’d be the one to make him want to stay, and all of them feeling the same disappointment or satisfaction when one failed. Then in comes a girl under a sponsorship by said extra rich kid’s father who then ends up dating each of them effectively removing them from the market, and meaning every single girl, generally all conventionally very attractive and whom most men would gladly keep as girlfriend, being ‘beaten’ as they saw it by someone with no assets. 

So to put a long story short, while you weren't super torn up about not having an easy to explain family tree, you weren’t ready to deal with everyone’s response to that little tidbit. All of this led you to now, sitting with Laito as he brushed your hair listening to your predicament.

“Like whatever about the teacher getting weird, I’ll gladly take the free pass to ask for extra stuff. But you really made everything difficult. I can handle snide remarks from Hana, Aoi, and Emiko; they're mostly harmless. Yet, if they get it in their heads that I don’t have parents to cause any issues they might get worse.” You stopped to pick up some popcorn, holding your arm backwards to give Laito some. He took the opportunity to lick your fingers, snickering as you pulled your hand back, wiping it on your jeans. 

“Don’t be nasty, I'm having a serious talk. I just… some of the 1st year girls were horrid to Subaru’s girlfriend just for finding out she had been at a boarding school. They cornered her in the bathroom and stuck gum in her hair. Gum! Like yeah me and the girls tore them a new one but…gum!”

Humming thoughtfully, Laito placed down the brush switching to running his fingers through your hair. He moved to rest his head on your shoulder, letting a comfortable silence sit over you while he thought of what to say.

“If you want, I can get you a family tree in full detail”

“How would you even do that, if you just make people up and anyone finds out then it's worse.”

“We could always make one~”

A pillow to the face shut that idea down, laughing as he fell backwards against the cushions while you were glaring at him.

“Be serious! What am I meant to do?”

Sitting back up, Laito took your hand pulling you up.

“Follow me.”

Walking through the manor, Laito took you to a less well maintained wing. Cobwebs littered the hallway and the wallpaper was peeling slightly in patches, there weren't any electrical lights either, only wall sconces with candles Laito lit as you walked by. Laito was silent for most of the journey, only giving a hand squeeze of reassurance whenever you caught his eye. You weren’t sure if the squeeze he gave passing a portrait of Cordelia was to reassure you or him, whenever you even heard of that woman it sent shivers down your spine.

Paintings became more common the further you walked, most were of adults with a vague similarity to Laito and his brothers, others were portraits of women in beautiful dresses with a characteristic pale visage. Finally stopping in front of a picture of three young boys with a signature red and purple haired look.

“This is the only painting or picture of me and any of my brothers together. Me and the other triplets don't argue as much as Shu and Reiji but we aren’t close,” he turned, taking your hands in his. “You have sisters, actual sisters who you have stories and pictures with. Anyone who disagrees, I will handle.” 

“Gum in my hair Laito. It’s not a good look.” Laito sighs, pulling you close before you hear him mutter.

“Theirs will look worse when I cut it all off.”

Kanato Sakamaki

“Dolly, why are you in here?”

Turning to greet Kanato from where you sat in the quiet wing of the Sakamaki manor, placing your sketchbook back down beside you and making room for your boyfriend to sit nearby.

“I come here to sketch the portraits since I can’t get a good wifi connection to look up references. I really like this painting, it’s of you right?” 

Kanato sat down looking up at the painting then to your sketch. It was different to the painting in many ways, the main difference being that it was a younger him alone with teddy. You had changed his posing too slightly to make him look less nervous. He was pinching his fingertips though, a sign he was uncomfortable that he picked up from the exercises he had copied you doing to help regulation. You could see he was struggling to find his wording. Scooting closer you placed a gentle hand on his shoulder to reassure him you cared and were listening. 

“It’s pretty, but dolly I don’t like you being here.”

“Why Kanato? It’s nice here, nobody comes here to interrupt or be loud and there's all these pretty paintings. What’s wrong?” Continuing to play with his fingers, he moves closer to you turning to face you straight on.

“This is where…her room used to be. We have to leave me and Teddy hate it here.” Immediately you were filled with questions. While you knew Kanato, Ayato, and Laito killed their mother and have mixed feelings towards her, you had never seen Kanato spooked. It did explain why this area was not well maintained. You had to bring a brush with you during your first visits to the wing to remove some of the largest cobwebs and first from your seat. However, you had to admit that with the newfound knowledge that these halls were where your boyfriend had been tormented by his own mother for centuries it changed the atmosphere. Suddenly the quiet was now tense, the weathered appearance of the halls becoming creepy signs of lifetimes long since passed. 

So you went along with Kanato’s instruction, returning to the more familiar manor where Reiji had familiars ensuring everything was organised and dustless. Following behind while mulling over the best way to approach this particular conversation. He led you to his room, sitting on his bed with your sketchbook and flipping through it. Pacing the path from his bedside locker to his balcony doors slowly, Kanato watched you. Around your fifth lap he gently grabbed your forearm guiding you to sit next to him, playing with the pages of your sketchbook. He turned to one of your favourites, you had drawn Kanato sitting in front of a backdrop of rose bushes. A small smile on his lips and a glint of childish glee in his eyes.

“I’m hanging this one up.”

“That one isn’t fully vanished, it's only a sketch.”

“But I like it, so it’s finished and I want it on my wall. And I want a matching one of you to go beside it.”

Sighing in acceptance you took his hand winding your fingers with his. It was probably better to shelf some questions anyway, while you were well past the stage of Kanato stabbing you with a fork for too many questions it was still not always easy to bring up sensitive topics. 

Subaru Sakamaki

“Oi, idiot the car is outside. Are you ready to go or what?”

Grabbing your earrings and standing, you began walking over to your boyfriend in a new sundress and short heels for a lunch meeting with Christa at some new vampire restaurant she had taken a liking to. In the years following yours and Subaru’s relationship, both of you had begun to put work into  helping both Subaru and his mother move forwards in their lives and reducing the impact their past traumas had on them. It was a slow and difficult progress with what felt like 100 steps back after every step forward but Christa had reached the point where her good days outnumbered her bad ones with the help of a team of specialists and patience. 

Within the last half a year Christa had begun to travel short distances from her home, a fairly new cottage Subaru had built her close to the manor after we graduated from Ryoutei Academy. Today’s trip was to a cafe she had been to numerous times with her trusted hand maids, so it was an obvious choice for the first excursion you and Subaru were joining in on. On Subaru’s part you had nothing but admiration and pride for the strides he had taken, he still had periods of self doubt often linked to birthdays and when his father was involved. However, such episodes were short and he had grown into more healthy responses to these thoughts, that still didn’t reduce his worries when interacting with his mother in environments that could trigger an episode. It took reassurances from Christa and her therapist to show that there was a set of precautions to ensure her safety before he agreed to this lunch. 

That brought you to today, where your boyfriend adjusted the collar of his pale grey shirt and looked at you with eyes that clearly showed his trepidation about this trip. Looping your arm around his as you made your way to the car you offered reassurance.

“She’s been looking forward to this lunch, she goes there every week at this point it's basically the same as when we have dinner with her.”

“The first time we had dinner with her she started screaming at your halfway through thinking you were a thief, before she tried to cut your hair off.”

“That’s not a fair comparison and you know it. Christa has found medicines that work and worked with Dr. Estelle for years now.”

“You know she  wants you to call her mum.”

“She’ll be mum when you get on the ring choosing we both agreed last time at dinner remember. She even offered to help you plan everything.”

Grunting, he looked away squeezing your arm while opening the passenger side door of his porsche. The ride was mostly quiet with you running your shared spotify playlist with Subaru mentioning concerns for you to counter with considerations made to address them. Once you arrived at the cafe Subaru relaxed quickly seeing Christa behaving normally. 

As always, you were greeted with hugs and excited interrogations as to the going ons of your life since your last visit. Christa had been so kind as to give recommendations based on your individual tastes, having an excellent grasp on the menu. She was also so kind as to bring an album of photos her staff had made of Subaru growing up to allow her to feel more included in his life while locked in that tower. 

“Oh my goodness! He looks so cute here, when was this one?”

You pointed to a photo of a roughly 8 year old Subaru sitting on a wooden table licking a spoon covered in some batter. Smudges of the batter were on his cheeks and shirt as a fire was lit in the background. It was a cosy image and something you had seen Subaru do before. Anytime you baked anything he insisted on spoon cleaning duty to ‘make it easier to clean’.

“Ah, one of my ladies in waiting had that painted after she heard me talking about how happy I was during that visit.”

“I love it, Subaru was such a cute kid!”

“I don’t see what's so cute, I’m just stuffing my face there.”

“Oh shish Subaru. She’s right, you were an adorable kid with cute little cheeks.” To emphasise her point she pinched his cheeks while cooing at him. Subaru only scowled in response, but it held no actual malice behind his glare.

While leaving the cafe, after nearly 5 hours of catching up, Christa pulled you aside to give you the picture claiming she had hundreds more. During the drive home Subaru kept looking at you admiring the photo. 

“You can always take pictures of me ya now. You don’t need to use a kid photo of me for that.”

“I have photos of you, I just like this one, it's special.”

“You’re such a weird woman.”

“Would you have me any other way?”

[cyb3rtarot]

Pick a Pile: autumn message + vibes + Halloween special

Hi everyone! I was not expecting this to be my first PAC but I felt called to do it. We’ll get a message of the season for you, the autumn vibes your energy gave off, and an extra message based on something spooky for Halloween! Hope you enjoy :]

Disclaimer: for entertainment only! The “autumn vibes” are Fall imagery that your energy reminded me of; “extra details” are real-life details of some people in the pile. I read with tarot, oracle, and my intuition. This reading used the Tarot of Mystical Moments, a recolored Smith-Waite tarot, and homemade oracle cards.

Pile 1 ➝Pile 2

Pile 3➝Pile4

Pile 1:

Message [the Empress rx, Death rx, the World rx|| ace of cups]: hi pile 1! You guys may be having trouble with the energy of release that the later months bring. There’s an overarching grief or melancholy for autumn; it feels like an emptiness where someone used to be. Try to have self compassion by getting extra rest and self care while you process emotions. Enjoying the celebratory or traditional energy of the holidays could brighten your spirits (even if you do something small by yourself); I do see many of you are very into Halloween and decorations. Pouring into self love and understanding is a good focal point. A portion of you are already in a committed relationship, and accepting the comfort and warmth of your partner will also be helpful.

Autumn vibes: black birds flying into a dusky sky, crystal balls, long black dresses, old movies, blurry/grainy videos, dark makeup and stiletto nails, matte lipstick, purple sunsets, hanging out with friends until night, denim jackets, dark rooms with old rugs, feeling deep nostalgia, looking through old photos and cameras, yellow street lights in empty parking lots, a vague but deep longing, skulls, pumpkins, visiting a relative, Warmth by Mityrion

Halloween extra—Vampire [five of wands, two of cups rx]: I channeled a vampire very strongly for you! Your energy came through before I decided to do the reading lol, you might have an imposing presence. There’s an alluring and magnetic aspect to you; others could feel hypnotized. The message I’m getting is you‘re attracting a lot of attention, and everyone wanting your energy may be overwhelming. Some of you have energy vampires around; those who make you ill at ease and are always seeking you even if it only causes conflict. You are more interested in solitude and peace. Some of you are content in a monogamous relationship and are getting bothered by others who have feelings for you. You may be bombarded with platonic or romantic invitations, and dance around people’s feelings with strategy so they don’t blow up at you. You are powerful and intelligent; make sure to protect your energy from draining sources!

Extra details: may tap fingers/fingernails on desk a lot, taking care of a grandma or was close to a passed grandma (for some of you I’m seeing white hair in a big bun/updo and circular glasses), missing passed loved ones in general. Meghan Markle or the British royal family could be significant? Black hair, curled bangs, interest in the occult. Twilight (both the time of day and the movies/books), “dark” feminine or femme fatale energy, someone madly in love or infatuated, Bojack Horseman, scorpio, 8th house, dances

~~~

Pile 2:

Message [the Moon rx, three of pentacles, Judgment|| the Sun]: hi pile 2! The energy of autumn you guys seem to be embodying is harvest and celebration! It looks like this year has been a journey in terms of healing repressed parts of yourself (heavily related to your Halloween message). After putting in the work, the current time is about enjoying the fruits of your healing. You’ve come out of the lessons with a greater capacity for appreciation and joy. For most of you, it looks like your loved ones or peers have been a big part of this growth; I do see you guys like to spend a lot of time out with friends. You have a clean slate for this new version of yourself, and you’re encouraged to continue basking in the blessings with those you love.

Autumn vibes: soft cotton flannels, knit hats (with pom-poms), boots, rural areas/small towns, orange leaves scattered everywhere, long walks, hanging out with your friends in the middle of nowhere until nightfall, hot coffee, hot chocolate with marshmallows, the woods, leather jackets, knit scarves, snowy mountains in the horizon, stepping on leaves even when they’re not crunchy, getting scared while exploring old buildings, local scary legends, snow crunching underfoot, trying to warm your hands, baking, drinking hot apple cider when it’s ice-cold out

Halloween extra—Cryptid [the Empress, the Star]: I channeled a cryptid for you pile 2! I don’t know a lot about specific cryptids, but I was mainly seeing something very hairy, humanoid, and bat-like. A small portion of you may resonate more with the Loch Ness Monster. The message I’m getting here is you guys have or are currently recognizing who you are and accepting that. In the past you may have conformed to others’ standards and this bred self hate or lack of self entirely. A place of self love and understanding is the focus, where you accept all your quirks and individuality even if others can’t. Some of you may be making peace with your expression of gender after turning away from it. You’re removing parts of yourself that are inauthentic or performative, and this is fueling the blessings you’re currently receiving!

Extra details: glasses (particularly a thick black frame), buying coffee (or hot drinks) out very frequently, taking aesthetic Instagram pics, the midwest, very cold Fall and Winter, small but close friend groups, light blonde hair, clumsy, hesitant, patient, moving somewhere warm or farther south; relatives with a thick Southern accent, bread, drawing/painting, millennials, the British Isles, Samhain

~~~

Pile 3:

Message [king of wands, the Emperor rx, the Fool rx|| the Sun]: hello pile 3! Interestingly, all the piles so far are getting similar advice in different fonts 😅. You are also getting a message about embodying the more joyous aspects of Fall’s harvest energy. You guys are in a mindset of doing what needs to be done according to your responsibilities and not much more. You may feel dissatisfied with the same old routine but not feeling up to doing anything else. This is the stoic farmer bringing in his crops to prepare for Winter rather than a lively harvest festival (metaphorically). You’re being encouraged to embrace that latter energy and warm your spirits in some Fall celebration—even if it’s finding ways to cheer yourself up in your head. Clouds do give way to sunshine!

Autumn vibes [TW paranoia, creepiness]: a single light on in pitch blackness, going to the kitchen in the dead of night, feeling alone yet watched, staring into the void, cloudy and dusty blue skies, cool coastal towns, eerie emptiness, liminal spaces, lighthouses, cold waves breaking on rocks, quiet solitude, lovecraftian-horror novels, the smell of tobacco, libraries in the evening, dark circles, feeling like the only person in the world, blurry faces in the distance

Halloween extra—Ghost [the Tower, the Empress]: many of you already feel like a ghost, disconnected from everything. A major upset happened that you’re still not “over.” This event shook you to the core and even destroyed some sense of self. Afterwards until now, you’ve been going through the motions and trying to survive, but not really “living.” However, I see that the metaphorical dust has settled. Now that things are not so unstable, you can come out of just “being” and start “doing.” What felt like the end was not, it was the prologue for something new.

Extra details: being blunt, the month of October or number 10 could be significant (besides it being Halloween), sitting in shopping carts, nihilism/apathy, smoking, denim jackets, the NorthEast US or cold, coastal areas. Reading. A town with a very small population. Big, empty parking lots, Lorde (particularly the song Team), feeling numb, grief, spooky video games, having lost a friend or friends being worried about you, being the breadwinner or living alone, dominant, money, spark of hope, standing alone on the beach

~~~

Pile 4:

Message [the Star rx, seven of wands, the Moon|| king of pentacles]: hi pile 4! It feels like you guys have been in a situation where stress is mounting very slowly but constantly. You could feel upcoming respite, but you’re not quite there yet. For a lot of you this feels like holding out for an upcoming break (maybe a holiday break). You guys are embodying the liminal, aimless energy that the last moments of the year bring. You may already feel like you’re in those strange days right before New Year’s where everything feels up in the air and you have no idea what’s going to happen; there’s a sense of not knowing what to do in the future. That’s what potential feels like! Autumn is reminding you that success and bounty comes out of uncertainty.

Autumn vibes: reading comic books in the evening by lamplight, making a big deal of your Halloween costume, trick or treating, costume parties, mounds of candy, watching the Sun fall behind the cityscape, old TVs, watching cartoons and funny Halloween movies into the night, wrapping in a tiny blanket, leaves brushing past while you walk, going to other neighborhoods to see the holiday decorations, varsity jackets, hands in your pockets, seeing your breath in the air, days getting short but feeling long, indulging childhood nostalgia, kids running down the street with capes, enjoying the cool air

Halloween extra—Shadow Person [the Star, page of wands]: for you guys, I’m channeling shadow people. I heard, “he’s just standing there… menacingly!!” Funnily, for other pile’s Halloween specials their energy and message matched the creature well, but for you guys it feels different. I think it’s because you have a more lighthearted energy, like if you were a shadow person you would troll people for laughs lol. Anyway, your cards seem to say the same thing! You guys have already gone in and out of really dark times—you’ve been in the shadow and separated your identity from it. Even if you’re in one right now, you’re not at the lowest point you’ve been and there’s potential for positive change. You’ve gone through the ringer probably more than once. You’re trying to ride the waves of life with a laugh after seeing the cyclical ridiculousness. You’re encouraged to use what you’ve been through to examine life from a new perspective of both light and shadow. Other people may not understand you at all without having your experience, but their perception doesn’t determine what you are or do.

Extra details: you guys may REALLY like comic book superheroes and villains (specifically DC; catwoman and the penguin? Also Spiderman), the hat man, goofy energy, conventions, an urban area with a lot of beige + brown buildings, swinging your hands while you walk, jacket pockets, high school, peace, religious friends or community, baptisms, lively churches, cartoon crossovers, planning to move once you finish this chapter of life, water is a very significant element; you might like sea animals, deep emotional world, strength, graduations, coming off as intimidating, not knowing what to do next, winter break, missionaries, Steve Lacy, Freddy Krueger

[lizhrs]

high school reunion with former bullies kirishima & bakugo

warnings: nsfw, mentions of bullying, dub/noncon (wc: 3K)

It took an embarrassing amount of convincing to get you to attend this reunion.

Which is pathetic in itself because you have absolutely nothing to be embarrassed of. It's been ten years since you graduated high school and since then, you've made a pretty decent name for yourself. You own your own house, your own car, have an amazing career in marketing with a promotion ahead. You're more confident than you ever could've been in high school and anyone would want to show off the amount of success you've had to your former peers.

But the fear overtook that need to gloat. The fear of seeing them again. After all these years, you despise how they can still terrify you. Just the thought of seeing them has your blood turning ice cold.

You try and tell yourself you're not that same depressing girl from school anymore and for the most part you aren't, except when it comes to thinking about those two jackasses who made your high school life hell on earth.

Seeing those assholes on tv being paraded around for being astounding heros is one thing but to have them in the same room as you is something entirely different. And you've been gulping down glasses of champagne to calm yourself but your nerves are still running rampant.

"Your ring is so beautiful." Uraraka grins, taking your fingers in her hand as her eyes sparkle at the diamond ring.

You smile, a gleeful feeling always taking over as you're reminded of the rock on your hand. The fact you're engaged is still so surreal, you managed to overcome so many odds and make a life for yourself. And that's what you’ve been telling yourself all night, repeating it like a mantra every-time the anxiety comes back. 

"You're so lucky." Momo swoons. "I would kill for a ring like that from my boyfriend."

"I still can't believe I'm engaged."

"I still can't believe it took this reunion for you to invite me to the wedding. Did our friendship mean nothing?" Uraraka feigns hurt, pouting at you.

You smile, although deep down you are ashamed over the fact. You didn't want to associate yourself with that school anymore, even if it meant ditching your former friends. "I’m sorry." You sigh. "But we can reconnect again, I have so much to tell you."

"You can tell me tonight!" She exclaims. "The night doesn't have to end just yet, you should come to the after party."

"Uraraka..." Momo chides. "Bakugo's throwing that party."

Oh.

You hate how you tense at that name. It's been years, why can't you simply just not care?

Uraraka's smile drops. "Oh yeah, sorry."

"It's fine." You nutter, hating the way they look at you like you're a wounded puppy. "We can talk another time, you have my number now."

"I should get going..." You continue. You've already spoken to everyone here and gotten most of their numbers for the next time you guys want to hang out. You know they like to be fashionably late so you've had the luxury of having fun without seeing them. But you know any more seconds spent here, you'll be regretting ever stepping foot in this building.

Uraraka pouts, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to—"

"It's been ten years guys I'm over it. It's just getting late and I have work early tomorrow." You smile.

They both nod, saying their goodbyes and hugging you tightly.

And you were so close.

So close to stepping out of the venue and into your car where sweet freedom awaited you.

But the universe had different plans as you opened the exit door only to bump into a hard chest. A bunch of sorries leave your lips as you step back, straightening your dress, you regret the idea of even apologizing as you look up to see him.

A wave of nausea takes over as you stare, mouth slightly agape. Your fingers clench the jacket in your hands as you try to remain calm.

He's gotten bigger. You've seen him grow up on tv and in the media, everyone either hating or fawning over their hero. He looks as confident and cocky as ever, blonde hair spiking up, muscles evident in the dress shirt he's wearing, lips pulled into a stupid arrogant smirk as his eyes pierce into you.

You could push past him, run away and into your car but you know whenever Bakugo is near, Kirishima isn't far behind.

And you're unfortunately right as you see the red head come into view, looking confused as to why Bakugo stopped walking until his eyes land on you. At first he looks surprised then a look of pure mischief and...something else you can't really describe settle in his eyes, causing your stomach to twist.

"Quirkless." Is the first thing Bakugo says. "I didn't think I'd see you here."

"You didn't think you'd see me at the high school reunion?" You mock, rolling your eyes.

He smirks at you, "Seems like you've grown a set of balls, doesn't it Kiri?"

Kirishima stays silent for a few seconds, eyes traveling up and down your body before he responds. "It does."

"A few years without us and suddenly Quirkless thinks she can talk back." Bakugo tsk. "Seems like we'll have to fix that."

You scoff, "It's been ten years. Have you really not grown up?"

He's still calling you quirkless, like it's the worst thing in the world. It infuriates you at how condescending he can be. And how he got everything he wanted after high school. Good things do unfortunately happen to bad people.

Kirishima snorts, slowly walking up to stand behind you. You tease, he's too close for comfort as his hand settles on your shoulder. "Don't tell me you're leaving already?"

"I have work tomorrow." You're shocked at how well you've been able to handle this situation, you thought you would've been a trembling mess the second you saw them.

"We haven't seen you in years, Quirkless. We have got to catch up." Bakugo grins, walking closer. His finger brushing your cheek. You hate how they think they can just touch you after all this time, hate how you can't do anything about it.

"I have to go." You say, ignoring the lump in your throat.

"You have to come to the after party." Kirishima grins, and its most definitely not a suggestion.

"We've missed our favorite pet."

It's pathetic. So utterly pathetic how easily you give in. In your defense, it's not like you could walk away from the two most powerful pro heroes on the earth but still—it's humiliating. you're not a teenage girl anymore. You're a grown woman, but the second you were in the same vicinity as them it's like you were back in that classroom. So defenseless and small against the two biggest meatheads in your school.

So here you are, in Bakugo's obnoxiously huge and luxurious house. Everyone is having the time of their lives, drinking and taking pictures to show social media they're in the number one heros house. But all you can think about is how you're going to get out of this.

They quite literally forced you into their car, a car you could never afford even if you sold a kidney and drove you here. The car ride was silent except for the incessant beating of your heart, you've gnawed at several fingernails since you saw them—a habit you haven't done in years.

You're scared.

It's annoying how scared you are.

And you try to remind yourself there's nothing they can do in a room filled with people but then you remember all the ways they would taunt you in those classrooms back then. People did nothing then and they probably won't do shit now considering how powerful the two have become.

They left you to yourself after you all entered the house, going to greet everyone else. But now you can see Bakugo making his way towards you and you try your hardest not to puke over your new heels. "Let's go quirkless."

"W-where?"

You're stuttering. You haven't done that shit in years.

He smirks, noticing how anxious you are. "Somewhere private."

"I don't want to." You force out, looking around the house, hoping Momo or anyone that can help is near. To save you from this bastards hold but all you see are drunken faces.

He laughs, the sound causing you to flinch. "How cute." His massive hand closes around your wrist, pulling you out of the chair and further into the house. Away from everyone else.

He walks around like any Number one hero would, obnoxiously cocky. He pulls you into another living room…or bedroom? A mixture of both you conclude as you see the bed in the middle of the massive room. "W-what are we doing here?"

Your breath hitches as you see Kirishima, he's putting ice in a cup then pouring whiskey in it. The tie around his neck has loosened, shirt tucked out of his pants. He looks tipsy.

Not a good combination with his personality.

"Y/N!" He grins as he sees you.

That's the first time you've heard your name tumble out of his lips in years and you jump at the sound. "I—what do you guys want."

Bakugo chuckles. Kirishima laughs.

You hate how they're acting like they're in on some inside joke you don't know about. What the hell do they want? "Look, I know okay? I know you guys hate me and all but it's been ten fucking years and I would think after being hailed as heros, you would have better shit to do then torment a former classmate. So just let me go."

Bakugo hums. "But you're not just a former classmate, are you? You're Quirkless, our little y/n." He takes off his jacket, throwing it to the side and you try not to notice the way his muscles flex.

"You guys are still so obsessed, it's pathetic."

"Did you hear that Kats, we're pathetic." He snorts.

Bakugo doesn't seem to find it so funny. "A quirkless whore calling us pathetic. Now that's something." He sits down on the couch, stretching his legs.

“Excuse me?" You scoff.

“I hear you're engaged." Bakugo starts.

“To some marketing nerd." Kirishima pipes in.

"I saw him the other day y’know he was absolutely terrified of me." He grins. "The freak didn't even bother putting up a fight."

"What did you expect from a little nerd like that?" Kirishima sighs. "You should've gone easier on him."

"I did." He says, "It's not my fault he's weak." They're talking like you're not even here.

The cogs in your brain start to turn, the nausea returning. Your fiancé got into an accident the other day, he said he was mugged by some lowlife robbers but the police took care of it. That's why he wasn't able to come with you tonight, he was still nursing his wounds...you mean Bakugo was the one who did that to him?

"You...w—what?" You breath out. "You did that to him? You attacked my fiancé?"

He rolls his eyes, "So dramatic."

"What the hell is wrong with you?" You yell. "Do you think just because you got some medal you can do whatever you want? Your hatred for me runs that deep you have to go and attack the people I care about? You're—you're pathetic!"

"There's that word again." Bakugo sighs, standing up. "You go and get engaged to some loser who doesn't even know how to tie his own shoelaces and yet I'm the pathetic one here Quirkless?" He scoffs, now standing directly in front of you.

"You let him think he had a chance with you and yet I'm the loser. You let that freak touch you and yet I'm in the wrong here?" He asks, fingers ghosting over the strap of your dress. "I suppose it could be our fault, we let you go for too long. Let you think you were allowed to let some extra fuck you."

“W-what?" You take a step back, what's wrong with him? "You're—I'm calling the cops and reporting you. You can't just think—"

He grabs your hand, taking the ring off your finger before you can blink. "What are you—"

He throws it away, to the side and into a corner you can't see. What's wrong with him? You're too terrified to even talk now, seeing the dangerous look in his eyes. You don't think you've ever seen him look at you like that. He's been angry with you before yeah but now for some inexplicable reason he looks infuriated mixed with a flash of disappointment.

“You're ours, Quirkless. Have you forgotten so quickly?"

“You're insane." You take a step back, confused on whatever they're on. Theirs? They've done nothing but torment you and somehow think that...what...you take another step only to bump into a chest. You gasp as a hand snakes around your waist. Kirishima puts his nose in the crook of your neck, inhaling you.

"You've grown y/n, looking more gorgeous than ever. Everything taking its natural course." He chuckles, hand ghosting over your breast.

“Let go of me." You whimper, too scared to say anymore.

“Why would we do that? When we've been waiting years for this?"

“Years?"

"We've been watching you over the years, seeing the countless of men that have come and gone. We let you have them because it was never anything serious but this...we had to take some sort of action to fix this. I mean engagement?" Bakugo laughs, although there's no humor behind it. "How could we ever allow that?"

"You have no control over my choices." You grit through your teeth. "Allow? You can't allow me to do anything, you don't fucking own me!"

"That's where you're wrong." Bakugo takes several steps towards you, face inches away from yours, crazed look in his eyes. "We do. And we should've established that sooner it seems. But no worries, we have plenty of time now."

He's too close. Towering over you. Suffocating you.

You need to get out of here, away from these freaks. You thought it was simple bullying, losers needing to feel some sort of importance by picking on the weak kid but...it's not. Not with the way he's looking at you, with the way Kirishima's breath is fanning your neck, hands getting dangerously close to your breasts. This is some sort of sick obsession. An infatuation and sense of possessiveness they've had on you for...god you don't even what to think for how long.

You shake your head, not thinking twice as you jam your elbow into Kirishima's stomach. For a pro hero, he actually stumbles back, coughing in pain. You don't waste a second, using the free space you have to run towards the door.

Just as your fingers are about to wrap about the knob, you're pulled back. Fingers gripping your hair, pulling and yanking you away from the door. You scream, hands coning up to offer some sort of relief to your aching scalp.

It's Bakugo. You know, just from how rough he is. He's always been the one who never cared about the inhumane strength he's had compared to you, tossing you around like a rag doll whenever he pleased. Back then, you thought it brought him some sort of sick satisfaction to witness how weak you were underneath his grip. How he could do whatever he wanted to you and all you could do in retaliation was whimper and cry.

He drags you across the room, your knees hitting the floorboard as you're forced to crawl. He throws you down on the bed with a bounce, a yelp escaping your throat. You scream again, an ear shattering one just in hope anyone will hear. "Shut up." He grits through his teeth. He moves too fast for you to even comprehend what's going on before it's too late, before he's on top of you and his hand around your throat, tight and snug.

"Can you be quiet for us, y/n?" He asks, this time voice so guttural low it frightens you more than before. You're trembling, lips quivering as you do your best to nod.

“Good." He sighs, hand leaving your throat. He grins down at you, eyes looking over every inch of your body. You look at his arms now on either side of your head, can't help but stare at the pumping veins flexing along his arms. He's huge. Has more muscles than you can comprehend and could easily string you up and leave you for dead. And you don't want to die.

Back then during school, they would never hurt you too bad as long as you behaved. So you force the anxiety and terror down, trying to will the trembling away as you look up at him. "A-are you going to kill me?" You can't help but ask, voice painfully low.

He doesn't look like he minds you speaking, only stares at you in mock pity. "Of course not."

“We could never." Kirishima comes up, sitting next to the both of you. His thumb touches your bottom lip, caressing it. "We just want to get some rules down babe, like before. And if you follow them, we'll never have to hurt you."

"R-rules?"

Bakugo nods, knee slightly riding up between your thighs, lifting your dress up just the tiniest bit.

Kirishima smiles, finger running small circles on your shoulder, the small action causing you to shudder. "Like rule number one for instance..." He starts.

"When we offer to fuck you." Bakugo takes over. Fingers going to the straps of your dress, pulling them down. You choke on your fear, on your panic and anxiety as you shake your head no, words failing to escape you. "You beg and thank us for it." He finishes simply. Like this is an ordinary conversation between two consenting adults.

You open your mouth to speak, voice coming out in shuddering, shaking tone. "Please..." It was a plea for them to stop, for them to regain some sort of morality and let you go.

But they only laugh, ignoring your tears as Kirishima smiles. "See? Just like that."

[brattyprettysub2]

Skin Care Routine

All characters in this piece of fiction are role-playing adults.

*

"I swear they're getting bigger," she says. "Look. Look. You're not looking."

He sighs and finally looks up from his book, peering at her over the top of his reading glasses. "What's getting bigger?" he says.

He never listens. "My breasts," she says. There was a time that if she was topless in bed and rubbing moisturizer into her chest, he would have been all over her -- but now, she can see his gaze already drifting back to the page he has bookmarked with a finger. "Look," she says, twisting to face him. "They're bigger."

"No, they're not," he says, and he doesn't say it like he doesn't believe it. That would be bad enough, but he says it like he's bored. Like he's heard this all before and he's tired of reassuring her. She blinks at him, hurt, and his expression softens just the tiniest bit. "Honey," he says. "Come on. Is it -- I don't know, your period?"

Her breasts often do feel heavier when her period is due, but she shakes her head. "It's not like that," she says. "It's -- they're never like this. I've gone up a cup size, at least."

"No, you haven't." He looks annoyed now, his book fallen shut in his lap. "Do you want attention, is that it? Is this --" His brow creases and he looks almost disgusted. "Are you trying to seduce me?"

"No!" she says. She turns away from him, burning with embarrassment, and grabs her sleep T-shirt and pulls it over her head as quickly as she can. It's one of his old ones and it used to hang off her, a few sizes too big, but now it stretches over her chest -- but she's not going to make him look at that now. She curls up on her side, facing away from him. There's some moisturizer left on her hands and she wipes it on her thighs.

He sighs and shifts in the bed. "I love you," he says. "You look great."

That's not how he used to say it. He used to say it with his hands all over her. They were late to so many dinner reservations because she'd get all dressed up and he wouldn't be able to keep himself from pulling all her clothes off. He used to fuck her in their entrance hall, her back pinned against the wall, her legs wrapped around his hips, his teeth on her throat.

"Thanks," she says. "I'm sure it's nothing."

*

"You didn't tell me it would work so fast," he says on the phone later, standing on the balcony outside their bedroom. The spring air is chilly and he pulls his dressing gown tighter around himself. The embers of his cigarette glow in the dark and he inhales deeply. She doesn't know about these little smoke breaks, thinks that he gave up his midnight cigarette years ago. Sometimes, he thinks about putting it out on her breasts -- only lately, the fantasies have changed from stubbing it out on the tight buds of her small breasts to burning marks on udders that sag under their own weight, drooping down her chest.

His friend on the other end of the call laughs. "Neat, isn't it? I was seeing a girl who was fucking useless at remembering to moisturize. That was a pain, I had to keep reminding her. But Jeanie's pretty diligent, isn't she?"

"She is," he says. "Every night and every morning." He takes another drag. "She's freaking out. It took everything I had not to laugh." He pitches his voice in a falsetto, a mocking imitation of his wife. "They're bigger, aren't they? She was complaining this morning that none of her bras fit right."

"Wait 'til you see how sensitive she gets," his friend says. "In a day or two, give her nipples a tweak, I promise you she'll come on the spot."

He ashes his cigarette in the ashtray he keeps hidden behind their potted plants. "And they'll just keep getting bigger as long as she uses the moisturizer?" he says.

"Until she stops, yeah," his friend says. "Which she won't do on her own, not if she's using it so often. They get addicted to it so easily, it's crazy. The other day, I found Tessa using it as lube while she fingered her asshole, so now I give her an ass and pussy massage with it every night. She keeps asking me to take a look at her clit and tell her if it looks weird." He laughs fondly. "Stupid slut. It only seems to really work on their pussies and tits, though. Which is good, I don't want to worry about, like, huge elbows or something."

He hears a soft noise from inside and immediately stubs out his cigarette. "I've got to go," he says, and hangs up, flapping his dressing gown to try get the smell of smoke out of it. He gives up when he hears another noise from inside -- unmistakably a moan this time -- and he just leaves it hanging over one of the chairs on the balcony.

He slips inside. "You okay, hon?" he says. He can hear the blankets rustling, can see slight movements in the dim room.

"I -- yeah." Her voice is tight with pleasure, but there's an edge to it. Confusion, maybe, or fear. God, he'd love it if it were fear. "What were you doing outside?"

"Couldn't sleep," he says. He slips back into bed and reaches for her. He finds both hands on her breasts, squeezing and pinching at the flesh. "What are you doing?" He makes himself sound disappointed rather than aroused. "Honey, I told you, your tits are fine."

It's a test. She's never liked the word tits, has always snapped at him for using it in reference to her. But now, a little groan bubbles its way out of her mouth and she rolls towards him. She straddles his thigh and her pussy is slick and hot against his skin. "Can you -- can you touch me?" she says.

It takes everything he has not to shove her hands from her breasts and replace them with his mouth, to sink his teeth into her and twist her nipples and make her come solely from him hurting her tits. But instead, he sighs and twists his hips slightly so she can't feel him getting hard. "I'm exhausted, babe," he says. "Can you -- I mean, I can go down on you or something, if you really want, but..." He trails off, reluctance dripping from his every word. "Why are you being so weird tonight?"

She moves away from him like he slapped her. "Sorry," she says. "I know. I don't know. I woke up and just -- anyway. Sorry. I'm sorry, you go to sleep. I'll just -- go make myself some tea or something."

She gets out of bed slowly, like she's hoping he'll call her back. He stays completely silent, other than deepening his breath like he's already fallen asleep. He hears her footsteps shuffle on the carpet, hears the creak of the bedroom door as it swings open and shut.

The moment she's gone, he wraps his hand around his cock and starts tugging at it, hard and fast, dripping enough pre-come that there's no need to reach for lube. He wonders if she's actually making tea or if she couldn't resist fingering herself, if she's bent herself over the kitchen counter so she can rub her breasts on the cool marble while she buries her fingers in her cunt. He hopes that she feels disgusting after she comes, hopes that she's left trembling with shame, hopes that she can't help licking the taste of her leaking cunt from her fingers.

He falls into a deep, peaceful sleep seconds after coming. He doesn't remember his dreams when he wakes up in the morning, but she's back in bed beside him, her forehead creased with a concerned frown even in her sleep.

*

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[luna-rainbow]

Thanks again for answering my ask and sorry to bombard you with these.

I absolutely agree with you about Bucky and Zemo on TFatWS. This might be long as I have so many thoughts about this. The series seems to fail to understand T'Calla wasn't just someone who helped Bucky although he was of course. He was his friend. The movies don't get everything right with Bucky but I think Bucky and T'Calla's relationship is one of the high points. We don't see them much but when you do you can tell Bucky respected T'Calla immensely and not just because he's a King. He seems to be really genuinely fond of Shuri as well, asking her to call him Bucky instead of the formal Sargeant Barnes.

I know I said it before, but the Wakandans are his friends/his protectors/his adoptive family. He is not just some white guy with colonialist arrogance who expects favours from the African State. If anything its the other way around- he fought because he felt he owed T'Calla and his family a debt.

As such- I do not think he would ever have helped the person who killed T'Callas father. Yes he didn't know T'Chaka, but that is his friend's father. Its like if he found out someone killed Steve's mother and worked with them. Like slapping his friend in the face, and I can't see him doing that.

Also, finally can we talk about how the show robbed us of the emotional impact of T'Challa's death on Bucky? He's sad about Steve leaving but I firmly believe would have grieved for T'Calla too. He's lost not one but two of his best friends within a very short space of time, so he's got grief alongside all his other problems to deal with. Don't know how that man managed to stay sane. Well relatively sane and didn't have a complete breakdown.

Thanks for all the asks!

I love the idea that T'Challa and Bucky had a strong bond. I agree I think Ryan Coogler intended in that short post-credit scene to show that Wakandans have accepted Bucky as part of the family.

The kids are peering down curiously at him as he sleeps, and he doesn't startle, nor does he startle them when he wakes. There's a high degree of mutual trust there. He lives in their community, not in a boxed off high tech room like the one where he was put to sleep. They dressed him in their ethnic clothing and colour-coded it to match Steve. Someone tied (and probably combed) his hair for him when he didn't have a prosthesis. Someone has folded a blue shawl and tied it into a pretty sling to protect the stump of his arm. This is the image of a guy that was being well looked after -- not just in an impersonal, we gotta keep him alive kind of way, but in a what can we do to make his life better kind of way, and if that isn't some sort of family I don't know what is.

I mean...compare with this costume...that looks like some random sweatshirt from some sports brand worn backwards with the extra fabric pinned and pulled over tautly over his right shoulder, complete with the soft elastic cuffs and the weird neckline. Coogler put more effort into a 30 second cameo than TFATWS did for one of Bucky's most emotionally poignant scenes in a series where he's the main character. Sorry I'm never going to pass on an opportunity to shit on the series.

And like yeah, while I don't ship T'Challa and Bucky (I really like T'Challa with Nakia in the MCU), I think they're an underrated dynamic. They strike me as somewhat similar in temperament? Both peace-loving, respectful and compassionate guys, who have a strong sense of loyalty and a fierce streak when someone they love is hurt. And both Bucky and T'Challa are older brothers to younger sisters, and they both have that oldest kid sense of weary responsibility. And for someone who was broken out of 70 years of brainwashing by being reminded of a promise he made, Bucky clearly has a strong sense of loyalty and responsibility.

So yeah, it makes no sense to me that Bucky would actively do something so personally hurtful, so disloyal and irresponsible to T'Challa, without adequate justification.

As for the mourning, yeah. At the time they didn't know how Coogler was planning to write T'Challa out of the story, so that might be why the mourning wasn't in there. To be honest, Bucky's feelings about Steve was handled poorly too. As I've mentioned before, the series avoids actually addressing how Steve's departure played out. Sam and Bucky are sad about Steve's absence, but never talk about the hurtful way Endgame!Steve abandoned both of them, which is far more emotionally relevant. They talk about him as though he had died in a noble sacrifice, not dumped the world on them and went to mess up someone else's timeline.

[velvetvexations]

People who would call me tme on account of my asab amuse me cause like I don't experience many forms of transmisogyny (many trans femmes only experience some forms. And transfemmes are not all binary trans women which I think gets forgotten extremely often) but at the same time, I don't know what they think the barrier for entry is to Properly experiencing transmisogny. Like do they think it stems from having a dick? Cause at this point I have pretty much all the other biological markers of what people assume of people amab. I'm openly gnc at work (not as much as id like to be but that's also about like physical work means can't dress the way I'd like) and it gets people very clearly assuming I'm amab nonbinary (I literally have my pronouns on my name tag and email etc but people interact with me and go "he, oh sorry they" (I don't use they them) regularly as an assumption) like what about being transfemme to them means you experience transmisogyny? Is it not from people regularly assuming someone is assigned male at birth/has a certain body but dresses/acts femininely/"like a woman"? Is it not real transmisogyny if I don't have a dick (yet)? Has a trans woman who's recently out and hasn't experienced anything negative related to her transition yet experienced transmisogyny? Is this hypothetical woman somehow harmed more (not implying she isn't harmed, just saying is it somehow Inherently more harmful because she's a "proper" trans woman rather than someone who isnt binary transfemme/assumed to be and treated as such, etc) by background radiation of transmisogyny than someone in my situation that is otherwise not dissimilar from a nonbinary transfemme person? At what point is it just about identity rather than real experience?

I wouldn't even call myself "TMA" as like an identity marker cause it's more complicated than that for my specific situation, but like, I look like a "man in a dress" as much as the next person who has gone thru a testosterone puberty and presents femininely but not quite to a "passing" standard (which is all bullshit and the assumption that transfemmes or even binary trans women have to Want to present a certain way or are somehow "asking" for discrimination if they don't or cant is bullshit etc. I'll go to bat for nonpassing/don't want to pass trans people of any gender any day) so I find it difficult to completely detach myself from the idea of being a target of transmisogyny because of an assigned sex so many years ago? And like it's not just a "oh I was once assumed to be trans a different way but when I explained it I was immidiately treated like a prince" this is a common lifestyle thing for me. Am I not affected by transmisogyny when I regularly choose not to wear skirts around my housemates because I don't know them and they assume I'm a guy? Am I not affected by transmisogyny when I get funny looks or get reminded anytime I wear a skirt in front of my mom to be careful when I dress the way I dress because people are not unlikely to take umbridge with how I look? I just don't see how my lived experiences are somehow binary opposite to a transfemme person cause its certainly possible for a transfemme person to look and live the way I do with no changes except for some aspects of childhood (and when ur viewed as a "weird kid" you often end up rather degendered by peers and adults so like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯) ultimately there's no one transfemme or transmasc or otherwise trans experience, and the way people act as if a trans person is somehow defined by their asab their whole life when the whole point (hyperbole) of transitioning is that you won't be viewed as such is so reductionist. Anyway sorry for stealing transfemme valor

TRFs want to define trans folk by their AGAB because they can't handle issues going beyond black-and-white polar extremes. If they were assigned the gender they identified as in the first place they would be dead set against trans rights, because the selfish desire to get what they want is the only thing that really motivates them and if they didn't personally deal with dysphoria they'd have no reason to expand their minds beyond even the tiny amount they've managed to.

[frogofalltime]

07.02.2024

today was me and @etherealspacejelly 's one year anniversary !!!!!

i got up feeling very excited about the day. i ate a bagel and an apple for breakfast and then got dressed and ready to go out. i met robin at the park to feed our pigeons, for the first Pigeon Wednesday that was actually on a wednesday in a long time !!

as i was walking to the park somebody said "excuse me sir" to me !! i was in a rush so i didn't have time to stop or say anything, but it made me so happy that i was smiling and happy stimming the rest of the way. this is the second time this has happened now :D

we exchanged anniversary presents, which was very fun. i think gift giving is my favourite way to show my love for people.

robin gave me a scrapbook full of memories collected over the past year, which he had kept a secret from me all this time, so it was a really unexpected surprise !!!! i did not know every letter, poem, flower, card, gift wrap, etc was being treasured in this way. it made me cry a little bit ;–;

we fed our flock and they were very happy to see us, then we tried to take some pictures which turned out very silly and goofy (in a good way)

we went home to eat buttered crumpets and then i read through the scrapbook while robin had a doctors appointment. my old letters were so cringe but also kind of cute. it was funny how half of robin's notes had my chosen name rewritten over my old name. it reminded me how much i have grown in just one year.

i took a walk through the park because the sun was shining, although it was very cold. i went back to my student accommodation to do laundry but all the washing machines were full. i was very hungry again so i had some cookies and (soya) milk and a banana. i have such a huge appetite these past few days !

i had a meeting with my peer support worker from the gender clinic which was very helpful. then i went back to the laundry room and managed to actually wash my clothes this time.

next i had an appointment with my adhd psychiatrist who agreed that it was a good idea for me to stop taking meds if they were making me feel really unwell. he said he will prescribe me a much lower dose and see if that's any better, but he said that even if i feel sick on the first day i should stop taking them straight away.

after that i started adding my own things to the scrapbook. i got really engrossed into that for many hours and i entirely forgot about my laundry and dinner and showering etc.

at last i realised i was extremely hungry and it was very late so i made myself a big meal (two sandwiches with vegetarian nuggets and lots of vegetables and some fries). i got my laundry and hung half of it up to dry in my room while the rest had to go in the dryer because i hadn't done laundry for a whole month so there was way too much.

i went on instagram and posted some of the pictures we took today. robin called me "the creature who lives in my walls" (this is a very accurate description of me) and that made me laugh and happy stim a lot !

i finally took a shower around midnight, which was overwhelming as usual. i was going to pick up my clothes from the dryer afterwards, but i felt too overstimulated and didn't want to leave my room, so i just went to bed.

it was a very good day and i'm exceptionally happy !!! i hope i can keep adding more and more good things to the scrapbook this year :)

[shelby-fangirl00]

1919-Part one

(Fluff)

Word Count: 1576

 (This is my first time writing my own fic so please be nice but also please give feedback! Thank you! I will be posting more chapters very soon if you guys like it!)

                                              --

‘Mornin love,’ I yawned as Finn shook me out of my sleep. I rubbed my eyes and adjusted to the gloomy morning light peering through my bedroom window. Another dreary, wet day in Birmingham.

‘Aunt Pol needs ya help in the kitchen this mornin. Said were feedin an army now.’

As Finn closed the door behind him, I shuffled over to the window. Looking out at Watery Lane. I saw some local boys picking on a girl their age. Couldn’t have been older than 6 or 7. As I watched them tease her, it brought a small smile to my face. Watching them reminded me of my childhood and growing up with the Shelby brothers.

Having Polly as a Godmother had its perks. My family, the Manson’s were a small Gypsy family that were close friends with the Shelby’s for many years. I grew up around the boys and Ada. All of my fondest memories are with them. I missed when things were simple, back then. Now, things are so different.

Tearing myself from the window, I quickly got dressed to help Pol. I rolled into some black stockings and a silky, black corset dress. Looking in the mirror, I sighed at the sight of my hair. Messy and untamed. I quickly threw it into a full and messy bun, blonde fly-aways and fallen strands sculpted my round face nicely. My dark grey eyes looked back at me through my bathroom mirror. I wondered if things would ever go back to normal around here, or what normal even looked like now that the boys were back from the war. It has been one week since their return.

Four years ago, Arthur, John and Thomas all left for the war and now, they were finally back in one piece, all three of them, which is more than other families got back.  

When they left, my mother was still alive and well. Just six months ago, she had died. No one was to blame but herself. She became paranoid and depressed, always drinking, always seeing things that weren’t there. Eventually, she drank herself to death. Died drunk in her sleep.

When she died, I had no family left other than my Godmother, Polly. My father had died when I was just five. Polly took me into her care and showed me the ropes. She offered me a bedroom as long as I helped her with Finn and the house. I have been living here for six months with Finn, Ada and Polly. Now, my three best friends were back and we were all under one roof. 

I rushed down the stairs and strutted into the kitchen. 

‘Mornin’ then Pol,’ I chirped while kissing her on the cheek as she was leaning onto the stove top. 

‘Right, mornin love. Sorry to wake ya so early, you understand?’ She said while looking up at me, smiling. 

‘Don’t mind at all, Pol. I’ll set Finn up, eh?’ She nodded to me and I started working on his breakfast. I enjoyed taking care of Finn with Pol. I felt protective over him. The only family he had was Pol and Ada. That is, until last week. 

After a while, I was met with the sounds of feet shuffling down the stairs.

‘Mornin Jasmine!’ John came up behind me, sneaking a kiss on mycheek and a small squeeze to my shoulders.

 ‘Will I be blessed with this type of treatment every mornin, then?’ John grinned wide at me while sitting down with Finn and Poly at the kitchen table. 

‘If you were smart, you’d be wise to kiss the arse’ of those who handle ya food, eh?’ I said as I sat a plate of hot food in front of John at the table, giving him an innocent wink. 

Arthur followed suit and sat down next to John at the table. 

I sat a plate down for Arthur as well, giving him a loving squeeze to the shoulder. He grinned wide at me. 

‘Well thank ya love, you’re too good to us.’ 

As I turned back to the kitchen, I was met by the sight of Thomas leaning in the doorway. He was nicely dressed, just as his brothers were. A newly tailored grey coat and slacks, with a white-collared button up underneath, cap in hand. His icy blue eyes met mine. 

‘Mornin Tom, ya eating today, eh?’ I sighed out, walking past him. As I walked around the kitchen, Tommy’s eyes scanned my body slowly, not caring if I had noticed or not. 

‘Not today, love. Boys, we should get to it. We’ve got business to attend to outside of the shop today.’ Another day of Tommy avoiding any type of conversation with me. 

With that, John and Arthur stood up while shoving their faces full of food before walking out the front door.

I stood in the kitchen, peering over at Tom, who was still leaning into the doorway.

Tommy’s presence was always intimidating. Even though I’ve known him my whole life, it was difficult to be close to him again. It was like he was never real after he left, like I made him up in my mind. I also forgot about how his presence sent a fluttering and warmness through my entire body. 

Tommy and me had been together on and off since I was 15 years old. We always had a different type of relationship compared to his brothers. He was more than just a friend to me. He made me feel light as air and always left my skin on fire. I missed him too much while he was gone. 

The night before Tommy left, we were intimate for the first time. We wanted to share something together before he left. We didn’t know if we would ever see each other again. I wanted to wait for Tommy, but he insisted that I don’t hold out for him. He didn’t want to ruin my future if he was to die. Now, Tommy was back after four grueling and lonely years, and we haven’t talked much other than greetings and goodbyes. 

I assumed Tommy wasn’t interested in me anymore, by the way he was acting. He would barely look me in the eyes until today in the kitchen. I wondered what had changed in him. I knew he had been visiting Lizzie most nights. It wasn’t my right to question it. I didn’t want him to know I cared. But I wondered why he’d rather pay for it when I’d willingly give myself to him. I missed the way he touched me, the way his fingers felt on my skin. Being near him was such a rush. He used  to feel  like the closest thing to home. 

‘See ya at the Garrison tonight, eh?’ he said lowly, holding my eyes in his. 

‘Only if you’re buying my drinks, yeh?’ holding eye contact with him as I placed my palms flat on the kitchen sink.

He chuckled and threw his head back to face the ceiling. 

‘When’s the last time ya had to worry about payin for a drink, Jas?’ 

My heart nearly flooded out of my chest when he called me by nickname. He was the only one that ever called me that.  

I couldn’t help but give him a warm smile and turn away to busy myself. He walked out of the back door, giving Pol a small nod. 

Pol gave me a cheeky grin and shook her head. 

‘Oh Jasmine, that boy is still head over heels for ya, isn’t he?’

You spun around to meet her gaze. 

‘Pol, he’s been home for days and has barely spoken a word to me. That was the most he’s said the whole week! I’m not gettin my hopes up to just be let down. You know this.’

‘Give em’ time darling, he’s not fully back yet. He’s still got a war goin on in that thick head of his, eh? You’ll be back in his bed in no time, dear.’ She stated while taking a drink from her tea cup, unbothered. 

‘Pol! He could still be outside listenin to us goin’on about him like we’are!’ We both laughed at this. Polly was usually always right about these types of things, but this was different. Tom was different this time around. He was a man now. He wasn’t as full of pure life as he was back then. It broke my heart that he had seemed to become such a cold person now. But I had grown too, quite a lot. I’m not the same as I was back then, either. 

The rest of my day was spent cleaning up and babysitting Finn. Since I am living here, Pol pulled Finn out of school and is having me stay with him. I enjoy spending time with the little man. He reminds me of his brothers. So sweet and charming and also can make me laugh without even trying.

                                                      ---

As I laid on my bed reading an old dusty book, later that  evening, Ada barged in. 

‘Jasmine, Pol and I are about to head over to the pub, ya comin with, right?’

‘Only if ya promise to get drunk with me tonight, then yeh.’ I teased while ascending down the stairs with her. 

‘Oh, fuck off, you’ll be fallin over by the end of the night if John gets his hands around ya, eh?’ we giggled down the hall. 

[captainjacklyn]

Making my first DOL post today..random game I got into, it's so easy to get invested.

So here is my PC, don't be fooled- that's a boy he just likes his hair long cause an someone told him it looked nice.

Kinda felt like giving him a small description, how he views most of the LIs and other characters, maybe him as a person idk this really feels like a shitpost. I only recommend the game if you aren't a minor and have a strong ass stomach cause I almost vomited the first time.

!!TW!! mentions of SA, blood, gore, violence, human experiments, death, abuse (both mentally and physically), psychopathic behavior, murder, mutation, stalking, if I missed any other triggers please inform me immediately so that I may fix my mistakes. If any of these topics make you uncomfortable, I advise you to please ignore this post and find something else more suitable. !!TW!!

Degrees of Lewdity :

APPEARANCE :

The slender young man slowly stares back at you and returns your greeting. "Oh..it's you." his name is Elias, he's a resident at the local orphanage, he won't talk back if you try anything. Just avoid taking off his gloves unless he allows it.

PROFILE/MAIN INFORMATION :

Species - human, any hybrid Occupation - student Affiliation - orphanage, oxford street school Age - 18 years old Height - 178 cm Birthday - 04th of April Gender - male (can morph his system into changing sexe so female too) Marital Status - Dating Sydney, Avery's side hoe Zodiac Sign - Aries Best Subject - English, History Interests - Cross dressing, sunbathing, napping, gardening, makeup

PERSONALITY :

Elias is an unfazed and blunt yet somewhat gentle young adult who quietly cares for others from afar. At first glance, many would think that he only speaks up when others wish to converse with him, even then his answers are short with little depth. Though it is stated that his confidence becomes much more evident once he gets comfortable, Elias can tease his peers and act playful. Furthermore, he will occasionally invite friends to spend some time with him. Whether it be taking a nap together, walking along the beach shore or reading in the library. He can crave company and has no shame in asking for someone's attention.

Not only so, but angering/provoking Elias is a feat itself, he usually avoids confrontation by walking away and even when things get out of hand, the young man will still struggle for the sake of running off. Though reaching a certain state of insanity, he looses all control of reason and will attack the offender without limit. This livid persona gives him an animalistic instinct to kill, relentlessly harming the individual(s) who previously caused his senses to go a-wire. The way he does this can get more gruesome depending on the previously inflicted physical or mental wounds on Elias, from forcing himself on them to tearing their skin open and eventually creating a gash deadly enough to give them a slow painful end. He stops at nothing until he's satisfied with how much suffering his abuser lives through.

InGameAU/Canon

Note - The statements above is largely different to how he canonically behaves. I have a knack for 'book accurate' vs 'show representation' and wanted a similar concept for my character.

In the game itself, Elias is much less of a victim and instead finds himself to be in constant control (I've been wary of any nonconsensual interactions, making a save before every choice that could lead to gr*pe or getting..y'know v*red). He is manipulative, defiant and easily angered. Belittling any passerby who leaves him a crude remark, regarding his more manipulative tendencies, this does result in him being a bit of a player.

One ↦ Robin can only have a specific percentage of confidence, preferably leaning towards a hundred but never fully. There is the excessive guilt-trip technique, Elias takes care of him from time to time and the moment Robin says something that could waver the white haired boy's sense of control he half scolds him by reminding Robin of everything he does just for him.

Two ↦ Sydney's purity = max level at all times. He doesn't want to deal with the possibility of having a bratty little *sshole follow him around everywhere for s*x. Especially not if the church proceeds to act up along with his corrupted state. The two of them are dating in game, Elias mainly uses him for protection at school, status wise at least. Due to Elias' line of work and desperate need to pay off Bailey, my PC cheats on Sydney practically everyday, having intercourse with multiple NPCs who offer a good price in exchange for his body as well as acting as Avery's sugar baby.

Despite this, he does care, I promise that he does. But his way of thinking would be similar to Alicent Hightower from House of The Dragon. He isn't narcissistic and has never once acted that way, however Elias is heavily twisted by loneliness abandonment issues go brr, anxiety and peer pressure (e.g robin getting punished for not paying his rent, Bailey possibly selling him off to the farm, etc..). This causes him to appear collected and normal at one moment and then unexpectedly go nuts.

BACKGROUND :

Elias' past follows most of the in-game's PC backstory, he was raised in the orphanage by Bailey and supposedly lived within that town his whole childhood. Another NPC who is only present in Elias' story is Monika, an older sister-like figure who was also raised in the orphanage but soon adopted and taken away. She is said to have learned to read rather quickly and many youngsters would come to her for stories, including Robin. Monika was especially close to Elias, treating him like he was a blood relative than just another inhabitant, their bond grew strong as years passed and her depart created a rather detrimental impact on Elias. Who closed in on himself and ceased to socialize, a partial root to his present conduct.

However, there is a darker side to his story. This would also explain the truth behind his gloved hands which he hates uncovering at all cost, as well as his existence alone. Elias wasn't conceived naturally, instead he was created inside an artificial womb manufactured by a non-governmental laboratory which was currently exploring the nature of hybrids (e.g beings such as the Black Wolf or Great Hawk). A group of scientist took a step further, planning a project which was yet to be approved by their employer, and decided to combine several varieties of animal DNA along with human ones. Their goal was to revolutionize the science of genetic research. Unfortunately, the team was found out and reported to their boss, who visioned Elias' birth as a horrific mistake exhibiting complete disrespect to the laws of nature. The people who had fabricated the unnatural child were instantly discarded from further company work.

Up until that point, the infant mainly looked human and acted as such. So the executive ordered for the toddler to be dropped off at an orphanage and forgotten.

TRIVIA/BONUS FACTS :

Elias is rather fashionable, he sometimes goes into the supermarket to try on a set of clothes before leaving without purchasing a single item. (the art is in the savings)

It is stated by several NPCs that he has a bad habit of staring, this is actually due to him daydreaming/spacing out whilst looking ahead unconsciously.

His favorite drink is lemonade and favorite dessert is lemon tart, anything that has to do with lemons is usually enjoyed by Elias.

When adapting to an environment, his hands are the first to metamorphose. They also connect to his emotions/primal instincts, circumstances like these are what drove Elias to hide them.

His screams sound like a mix of Caraxes and Syrax, his sounds are more guttural than actual cries.

CREDITS FOR PICREW :

#1; #2; #3; #4; #5; #6; #7; #8; #9

[jessicanjpa]

happy mother's day

It's Alice's first time baking with Esme! An excerpt from this 1957 one-shot. Esme POV.

"I'm home!" I called out from the garage. "And I could use some help!"

I heard Alice's delicate sigh three floors up. By the time I got around to the trunk and opened it, she had flitted to my side wearing a new striped yellow dress and a pitiful look of resignation. She stuck out her arms and I began filling them with bags of groceries.

"You don't really have to do this, you know," I teased her, scooping up the last four bags myself.

"I promised," she said, and her pout turned upward into the smile that was never very far away.

"You did! And it's a chance to learn something new. The older we get, the more we'll treasure opportunities like this."

"I suppose I will. But ugh! Why do you buy so much at the grocery store, and so many things that smell funny?"

We set the groceries down onto the kitchen counter all in a neat line. Alice rooted through the bags, her nose wrinkling more with each one. "I don't even know what this one is!" she complained, pulling out an enormous zucchini with two reluctant fingertips.

"A zucchini. It's a kind of squash. That's what we're baking," I reminded her. "Zucchini bread. And you know how important it is to keep up appearances, especially when we're new. Some of it does go to waste, but we end up donating a lot of it in the end."

We had enjoyed a good, long stay in Klamath Falls. Emmett had, unfortunately, had an accident near the middle of our time there. But it had been an easy cleanup, so it hadn't interrupted our stay. Edward had been able to earn his bachelor's in music performance and Rosalie had finished a degree in bio pre-med. Carlisle and I were fiercely proud of both of their achievements. And even though Emmett had drifted aimlessly between majors for his entire stay at Southern Oregon college, my mother-heart had nearly burst to see him come so far. He hadn't even been able to read when Carlisle had first changed him.

But six years was pushing it; the children hadn't really known what to do with themselves after graduation, knowing we wouldn't have much time left, and Carlisle was starting to get jokes at work about having found the fountain of youth. So after some traveling, we had ended up here in northern Michigan. Edward, Rosalie, and Emmett had just started high school again last week. Alice was torn; we had all hoped that she and Jasper would both be joining the others in school this time, but Jasper was still reluctant. The rest of us all thought he was ready. The only way our newest vegetarian was ever going to trust himself at school was to go and practice being at school. He was dragging his feet and he knew it, but it was his choice in the end. I just wished Alice would go ahead without him and enjoy herself.

My darling girl, full of sunshine! I busied myself getting the ingredients ready, smiling as I watched Alice take the groceries out of the bags, peering at each item as if it were from another planet. Out of all of us, she was the only one who had no memories of her human life—no memories whatsoever of things as commonplace as eating and preparing food. The whole concept was completely foreign to her, and until today she had skillfully avoided my every cajoling effort to join me in the kitchen. Everyone except her had taken at least one turn by now, even Emmett and Jasper. But I had won in the end.

"It's almost Mother's Day," I said to her last Tuesday. "And there's something I really would love; let's see if you can figure it out without any hints."

That was all it took; Alice couldn't resist a challenge for her visions. She loved stretching her gift like this, especially where shopping and surprises were concerned. She eagerly plunged into the silent world of pictures that swirled around inside her head, visiting department store after department store and flipping catalog pages, all without moving a muscle. It took her three days to figure it out.

"Esme!" she pouted, bursting in on me as I was painting that third afternoon. "That's not even a real present!"

"It is to me," I said, opening my arms for her reluctant hug. "You know I've always wanted to bake something with you." She made a face, but she also promised to follow through.

"Hand me the whisk, would you, dear?" I asked her now. She dug through the drawer of mysterious cooking implements, zoning out for a moment, no doubt to peek ahead and see what a whisk even looked like. I donned my favorite apron and tossed another one to her.

"I'll beat the eggs and oil and sugar if you'll peel and grate the zucchini," I offered.

"Gladly," she said, peering with distaste into my bowl. "I will never understand why humans like to scramble up animal embryos. Isn't that... kind of gross?"

"It is when you put it that way," I laughed. "I can't say it appeals to me either, not anymore."

Alice was concentrating, trying to figure out how to peel the zucchini. She was holding the peeler steady and drawing the vegetable back and forth along it instead of the other way around.

"Try the opposite way," I suggested gently. "You hold whatever you're peeling still and draw the peeler downwards, away from you. Then lift it up and start at the top again." She nodded and tried again, sticking her tongue out in concentration. Her pressure wasn't quite right and she ended up peeling away a good half of the zucchini itself, but I adored her effort. I laid three more down for her to do.

"You know I like to bake for various local things now and then," I explained, whisking the oil into the eggs and sugar at superspeed. "Hospital fundraisers, the children's ward, sometimes an event or two at whatever school you all are attending... Good. Now you're going to grate the zucchini right into this mixture." I demonstrated first this time.

"I'm sure they appreciate the gesture," she said, "but you and Carlisle give gobs of money to those things anyway. Wouldn't store-bought cookies or bread be just as good?"

"Heavens, no! They aren't baked with love when those industrial machines do the work. And it makes me feel good, too. It feels like I'm actually participating in a way that feels familiar and human. Baking was a way I showed love to people in my first life, so I kept on doing it in my second, even when I wasn't ready to go out at all. It's a shame I can't enjoy the food myself, but it's still special."

"You used to volunteer at Carlisle's hospitals, didn't you?" Alice asked.

"Now and then, yes. But it's been a long time." I hesitated for a second. "I've been thinking of a new adventure lately—going back to school."

"Really? You would pose as a college student?" She looked doubtful.

"I would be a college student," I laughed. "Why, do you think I look too old? I might need a little help from you and Rosalie..."

That perked her right up. We started chattering about ways we could make me look younger: hairstyles, makeup, styles of clothing and jewelry and shoes and purses, even ways I could talk differently. Alice got so focused on our brainstorming that her grating went faster and faster until her fingertips accidentally smushed the grater's holes in on themselves and she had a big mush of zucchini pulp on the other side. She put everything down and scowled at it.

"I don't think I'm going to be good at this," she said with a sigh, picking at the grater with her fingernails to make the holes right again. "For all I know, I've never done any of it before."

"It's all right," I assured her. I moved on to the dry ingredients in my own bowl. "We're so... perfect at so many things that I find it can be refreshing to not be so good at something, or to at least be so new at something that we can make mistakes. I bought several. Just try again." She took another zucchini, moving more carefully this time. She was concentrating so hard her tongue was sticking out the corner of her mouth again. She was so adorable; I couldn't resist. I snapped a picture before she could change her pose. She didn't even notice. Everyone had grown used to my clicking shutter by now.

Jasper had quietly joined us a moment ago. He was leaning against the kitchen door frame with his arms folded, watching Alice with the most tender, thoughtful smile. He caught my attention behind her back and twisted that naughty little corner-grin of his, the one he got whenever he was about to prank Emmett somehow. He pounced and grabbed her from behind, making her scream.

"I'm sorry!" he laughed, letting her go and dodging the half-grated zucchini she tried to slap him with. "It was just too easy—I could tell you were too immersed in your, uh..."—he gestured toward the mixing bowl vaguely—"for visions, and the stink was strong enough for a good stealth operation... what?" he added, narrowing his eyes.

"Nothing," Alice said sweetly, turning back to stir the putrid green mixture. "Just thinking of how I'll get you back."

"It was worth it," he promised, wrapping his arms around her again, this time for a peck on the cheek.

"Hmm," was all she said. Her eyes were absent, scanning the future. I picked up the camera again, just in case.

"I think you'd better get out while the getting's good," I told Jasper. "Unless you'd like to help out too?"

He held his hands up in surrender. "No thanks. I've already served my time. Emmett and I are going out to whip up some dinner of our own."

"You ready?" Emmett called out, just coming down the stairs. Alice whipped around and flicked a heaping spoonful of zucchini mush, hard, straight at Jasper's face. Jasper ducked just in time for the missile to fly over his head... straight into Emmett's open mouth.

I laughed and took the picture just as Emmett's eyes bulged out in horror. He spewed it all out, and it just happened to time perfectly with when Jasper stood back up, so he got a faceful as well. He swiped furiously at the mess and his mouth, and I got one more picture to commemorate the moment when my newest son tasted human food for the very first time. He looked like he was actually going to vomit, and he sounded like it too. He finally rushed over to the sink and flushed it all out with water, leaving a bright green trail everywhere he stepped. Alice was serenely stirring the batter, humming to herself.

"Was it still worth it?" she asked innocently.

"No," Jasper said, shuddering one last time. "It was not. Real funny, Emmett."

"You're blaming me?!" Emmett practically yelled. He was wiping his mouth out with my brand new kitchen towel. I sighed and took it from him, dropping it in the trash; I had learned the hard way never to put venom in the washing machine.

"I guess not," Jasper sighed, growling playfully at Alice as he passed instead of giving her a goodbye kiss. Emmett relaxed and turned to go, but Jasper flew up behind him and punched him so hard in the gut that a dribble of venom and old blood gushed out of his mouth. Emmett grabbed Jasper and roared and yanked the back of Jasper's shirt over his head before he could struggle out of Emmett's bear-sized grip.

"Take it outside," I warned them. I grabbed another towel and rushed to get the blood and venom before the dining room floor could start dissolving.

"NOW!" I shouted as they tumbled blindly into the sofa, knocking it askew by several feet. It took them a minute, still snarling and struggling to get a grip on each other, but they got out the back patio door without causing any further carnage. I caught the floor lamp as it fell, an inch before it hit the ground.

"Those two, I swear," I said, dropping the towel into the trash with the other one. "And you saw that whole thing, didn't you?"

"Who, me?" Alice said, stirring furiously.