#this post blew out of proportion too

[titles-for-tangents]

STRAP IN KIDS, THIS ONE’S GOT LORE

I cannot begin to tell you how fantastic this news is, because Beagle’s been unable to publish this one and has had it on the backburner for over fifteen years now. I’m Afraid You Got Dragons was originally supposed to have an Amazon release date of August 16, 2007, but as one reviewer in 2009 noted, “When this book first appeared in catalogues, I tried to order it. After some effort, I spoke with the publisher,” - alternatively listed across the internet as Puffin, Penguin Books, and Firebird - “who said that Beagle had withdrawn the book and it was never published. What a terrible shame! With that content summary, it would have been a fantastic Beagle story. Hopefully he will reconsider.” I wonder if we’ll get the original text or if he’s rewriting it? Either way I hope that Amazon reviewer hears the good news soon.

Per the 2007 description on Amazon:

“Dragons are common in the backwater kingdom of Bellemontagne, coming in sizes from mouse-like vermin all the way up to castle-smashing monsters. Gaius Aurelius Constantine Heliogabalus Thrax (who would much rather people just call him Robert) has recently inherited his deceased dad’’s job as a dragon catcher/exterminator, a career he detests with all his heart —in part because he likes dragons, feeling an odd kinship with them, but mainly because his dream has always been the impossible one of transcending his humble origin to someday become a prince’’s valet. Needless to say, fate has something rather different in mind...”

Like described above, The Bookseller notes a similar premise and that Gollancz will publish it alongside Saga Press (S&S) in 2024. AM HYPE

For the sake of media preservation here is the original, rad as hell cover art by Justin Sweet:

And the full version via John ONeill at blackgate.com:

I can’t wait to see what the new art will look like. All of the cover art for Beagle’s books is so contemplative and beautiful.

ONeill further notes that since the book was never published, no physical copies of it exist. He states, “The closest I’ve come to finding an explanation is this brief note at the bottom of an excerpt from the novel at Green Man Review, quoting a defunct section of Beagle’s website:

“’The story was originally supposed to be a 40,000 word novella, no longer. But it grew. The first draft came in at more than twice that: nearly 90,000 words…I’m Afraid You’ve Got Dragons was originally contracted to Firebird Books, and announced for a Summer 2007 release — but completion of the final draft was delayed as the manuscript insisted on growing, and because of time lost to unavoidable family issues, so the book was rescheduled for Summer 2008. Before it could be turned in, however, a serious business conflict came up between Peter and Penguin USA over the 40th Anniversary Edition of The Last Unicorn. This ultimately led Peter to conclude that after many years of association with Penguin imprints it was time to move on. Since Firebird was a Penguin imprint, that meant pulling I’m Afraid You’ve Got Dragons.’

“The site also notes that publication is likely in 2008 or early 2009 from Conlan Press, where ‘Peter will have the control over the book that he wants.’ But that never happened.”

ONeill wrote that article back in 2015, the same year Beagle sued his former manager at Conlan Press for a litany of serious claims. Six years later in 2021 Beagle finally regained the rights to his intellectual property, and if his bibliography on Wikipedia is to be believed, he’s been on a spree ever since following up on his various, previous works. I’m not just referring to The Way Home, the sequel novella to Two Hearts; Beagle is supposedly rewriting and expanding The Folk of the Air and turning his novella The Unicorn Sonata into a 4-part book series. HOLY SHIT. And we get an announcement the never-before-been-published I’m Afraid You’ve Got Dragons IS GOING TO GET PUBLISHED?!

The fact that A Fine and Private Place and The Innkeeper’s Song are getting reissues too is incredible; it appears Neil Gaiman will do a forward for the former, which he’s previously gone on record to describe as his, “I’d-wish-I’d-written-that-first” novel. Which is to say he must be over the moon. Hopefully we’ll see other future reissues too, like Tamsin, Return, and A Dance for Emilia.

Me when I finally get a physical copy of I’m Afraid You’ve Got Dragons:

Brace yourselves, Beagle fans, we have some big news coming today.

[ariel-s-awesome]

When I was in middle school I drew a picture of the school getting bombed with the teachers labelled.

My mom wanted to keep the picture because she thought it was cute.

[ukiyowi]

How Will You Be Remembered?

Note: I'm in the middle of end sem season which is why I've been so offline and like bad w posting, I hope you like this <33

Read from 1 -> 3

Find more at Masterlist

🌷 Pile 1

Hello Pile 1! I will start this off with don't take it to heart, this is not who you are, just how people may remember you or perceive you after you are gone. You may be remembered as someone who was not afraid of showing your vulnerabilities, some people may see you as weak because of this and remember you as someone who did not take enough risks or played it safe too often to the point of your own detriment. They could think you were someone who lacked confidence and had low self-esteem even though you may have "had it all" so people may remember you as someone who had a lot of potential to do great things.

People would also feel like you were the kind of person who had a lot of problems with self-victimisation or self-sabotage where even if you had resources you felt too scared or restricted, almost powerless because of your own mind. They could have thought that you faked a lot of your problems or blew them out of proportion to seem like you have it really bad, even if this is not the case in reality, (remember what I said earlier). You could also be remembered as someone who had issues with romance or in your domestic life, possibly with your partner where you may have been a little possessive or controlling, some sort of jealousy that gets in the way of you being able to completely devote yourself without even a sliver of doubt towards your partner, yeah people could remember you as someone quite ungrounded in that regard. They may also remember you as someone who had a lot of internal familial problems and disharmony possibly with your kids as well.

However! Not everything’s negative, people would also remember you as someone who celebrated their own achievements and had a lot of inner peace and harmony surrounding them. People may recall you to be a team worker and someone who is very ambitious and sincere when it comes to their work. Also someone extremely generous and willing to share their wealth not only materially but also your knowledge, wisdom, resources, time, etc. You would be remembered for being able to go through cycles of constant change and come out better and brighter on the other side, someone who is very good with leaving the past in the past and not looking back once you move forward. To top it all of you could also be remembered as someone who tries to keep the peace and mediate even if they don't want to, almost as if your hand was being forced every time because you had to carry the responsibility of keeping things civil.

If you like this and want morez buy a reading or tip, if you want at [Paid Readings] and ko-fi.com/taagen respectively.

🌷 Pile 2

Hello pile 2! You will be remembered as someone who is extremely intuitive. Maybe you are spiritual yourself and get bad vibes from people that are often correct (or good vibes), maybe you think or feel something is going to take place and let others know, and are dismissed initially before it turns out you were once again correct. So you would definitely be remembered as that, also someone who is very true to their roots and authentic, you can stay close to your culture and traditions and may even carry out conventions at the most with a twist of your own! People would also remember you as an individual who is very abundant, especially financially. Someone who has their business in different domains and tries to capitalise off of a number of ventures, also someone who starts their own ventures! Yeah, you may leave behind a huge sum of money or capital too, that may be inherited by the people around you so that would instantly have you be remembered as someone who is generous and good with their money, people would think you were the kind who never had any monetary issues that you had to face growing up or during your young adult ages even if it may not be true to reality.

You'd also be remembered as someone who is very bright, shines in whatever they do, and someone who may be the mood maker. Like the glue in friendships or workplaces, you would be remembered as someone who connects people with each other, like if you have a friend, and you introduce them to someone else, then those two people become friends even if you drift apart from them, you know what I mean? A little specific however, something that is coming through strongly. You may be remembered as a mentor figure too, like wise and knowledgeable, someone very open to helping others even if it does not benefit you in any way.

Now, some people may also remember you as indecisive, or someone who lacked commitment and that you were shrouded in self-doubt. They could also think that you may have knowingly or unknowingly indulged in gossip that could have been malicious in nature and that you may end up victimising yourself even if you have wronged someone else, you may be recalled as a figure in people's lives where you wronged them, but they had to bear the weight of all the consequences. Some could also think you were apathetic to a large extent and dispassionate about things when alive, that you did not use the resources and talents you may have had productively because of repeating negative cycles of laziness and procrastination which could lead you to not complete projects or meet deadlines.

If you like this and want morez buy a reading or tip, if you want at [Paid Readings] and ko-fi.com/taagen respectively.

🌷 Pile 3

Pile 3 you've got some goo d cards! You may have a lot of people around you and a lot of good friendships/family members and connections in your life who appreciate you because wow! People would remember you as a family person, someone who was very close to their relatives and had the kind of family that one would dream of having. Your children may carry some sort of your legacy as well where they may become very well known, and you would be remembered through them. People would also think that during the course of your life you were someone who got very lucky with marriage or finding your partner, so a lot of how you are remembered also come from your family like your relations with them, maybe your partner as well.

You could also be remembered as someone who is very active when it comes to social justice. Someone who always stands up for what they believe in even if you are in the absolute minority, but this could also come with people thinking you have a way of being forceful and pushy when it comes to wanting what you want, especially when it comes to arguments or conflicts. You may also be remembered as someone who used to challenge convention and play by your own rules.

There is so much familial stuff here, how you'd be remembered for being nurturing and playing a motherly role (regardless of gender) for the people around you as well. Also, remembered as being very confident in your own convictions and being extremely optimistic, like you could have helped people around you look at the brighter side as well.

Okay so this is a little aside, but it was a strong intuitive message that people could also remember you as someone who is accepting of new challenges no matter what, even if it is something that you may not have resources to completely pass obstacles. Also, someone who has a lot of turbulence in their life and ups and downs that may have pushed you to the edge, but this could be taken as inspirational for people, like seeing you go through so much and still make a good life for yourself could make people believe they can do the same, so you could also be remembered in a light of you being an inspiration.

Now moving on, you could lastly be remembered as someone who was not able to fulfil your true passions in your life and someone who could have passed without getting to nurture your inner child enough because of how busy you were nurturing the people around you.

If you like this and want morez buy a reading or tip, if you want at [Paid Readings] and ko-fi.com/taagen respectively.

Do not plagiarise copy or reword, all rights reserved to Ukiyowi©®

[qui-gg]

that one post you made about lightbulb and how she made up her entire relationship with paintbrush until ep12 made me like her character a lot more soo has ur thoughts and opinions on lightbulb and maybe paintbrush changed since episode 15??

Thank you for this question and it definitely has, it’s just been taking me a bit to think and format into words exactly how to say this! But with ii16 releasing soon i should go through this now, so be prepared for a ramble.

Since i’ve made that post, I’ve gone through a few more realizations about the preexisting material itself. I should say it’s a bit dramatized when I said she made up the ENTIRE relationship- there was obviously something there since they’d known each other for a very long time, after all Paintbrush does say “we’re STILL friends”, but she moreso took it and ran with it to a level it was never at. I’ve never properly talked about my feelings on Alternate Reality Show here? But it’s my favorite episode and I have TOO MUCH to say. I’ll be bringing up key parts of my analysis though since this is about 15.

This episode features Lightbulb’s elimination, and so evidently that means it should be seeking a way to properly wrap up her story. It’s not the total focus of the episode, and neither is she the main character (she already had that in 12), but I think it was handled the best way it could have been. Initially when I watched the elimination in the Chicago theater (slack jawed and having my heart broken I was cosplaying Lightbulb😢) there was a lot running in my mind but the fact Lightbulb’s expectations had been subverted in the very best way was on the forefront. Leading up to 15, there was a lot of extra material released that pointed towards hyping up Lightbulb. She’s a very popular character so the average fan’s expectation is exactly what she mentioned in the episode, that she’d win for her team. The exit interviews of the flying buddies ALL point towards their expectations of Lightbulb to win- which I think was SO clever and must’ve been intentional. Lightbulb likely hasn’t seen these interviews, but I think on a meta level it’s for us to see and then Judge Lightbulb’s reaction to those expectations. Because as she does, she takes something as friendly and simple as what Test Tube said to her at the end of 14 and blew it out of proportion. Her friends are giving her encouragement to win of course, because that’s the nice thing to say and do when your friend is in a competition! But as we learn from 12, Lightbulb is seeking more from the game than just the game. She’s here for relationships first and foremost. And, we see that she has so much more of a thought process beneath the surface than we initially expect, that she is very observant and aware of her own feelings and others and takes that into account which presents as her backwards intentions in her quirky behavior, the stuff she does that doesn’t seem to make sense all has meaning. (We also see this exerted in one of my favorite Lightbulb appearances, the Jacknjellify upload of the 2022 meetup short, where there’s a scene of her in her own head through the situation. She recognizes she’s failing an interaction, gets insecure about it, and we see her make up a quirky lie in real time! It’s incredibly important LB material) She just prefers to distract herself from them the more intense they get because when things get more serious it is hard for her to be taken seriously or believe that she could be. And Test Tube is very important to all of this despite not speaking in 15 because Lightbulb’s relationship with her was one of the first that became Real. Test Tube recognized that Lightbulb was struggling most prominently as she alone had been on that journey with her and had that talk, she knew her heart wasn’t in the game for a long time. Which affects her actions towards her in 15! But I’ll get to that in a bit. The point i’m trying to make here is that it is the PERFECT SUBVERSION of audience expectations, that Lightbulb would be willing to win for her team, to reveal that instead she just wanted to go home and be with her friends. She had built up those expectations for herself too and thought EVERYONE (both her friends and on a metatextual level, the real fans) would be disappointed in her for feeling that way but it’s something you can see if you’re looking! Her reactions to all the flying buddies’ eliminations, in the 14 stream there’s a discussion about how she’s not doing well at all being all alone, She just disguised it! As usual! And punished herself for feeling different. And I need to emphasize IT IS THE PERFECT WAY TO GO TO ELIMINATE HER VIA LIE DETECTOR. That was one of the coolest things to me. LIGHTBULB, WHOSE FATAL FLAW IS THAT SHE CANNOT SAY WHAT SHE’S FEELING COMPLETELY STRAIGHT OR HONESTLY, WHO NEVER MAKES SENSE, is forced to fight for a position she doesn’t believe she deserves on a lie detector. My little analytical heart knew as soon as the challenge was revealed she was out. But again, the way it all played out was subversive in just the right way and accurate to her character and I couldn’t be more thankful.

Now it’s time for me to address the Lightbrush elephant in the room. I think Brian said it best on the Jazzy ii15 stream- why does a relationship need to be romantic in order for it to be special? There’s a lot there that is written into the show as is that doesn’t need a kiss scene to suddenly make it pay off or matter. So in this analysis i’m not here for Lightbrush at all. It’s best appropriate to look at it from the lens of a platonic friendship as it was intentionally written and portrayed in the show itself, not to speculate on things that aren’t there.

(Plus, i’m less of a fan of the ship these days. My relationship with it is complicated. I just adore Lightbulb and Paintbrush as characters too much)

Obviously it had to be Paintbrush who responded to the emergency signal. It wouldn’t make sense thematically for it to be anyone else. It was revealed by Brian on a few streams that Test Tube chose to tell Paintbrush to go answer the signal intentionally to help Lightbulb out, knowing that she was missing them and her heart was not in the game. I think it speaks to the strength of the flying buddies that they’re able to read each other like this! In III, we come to understand this is how Paintbrush was feeling after their elimination in 12 and solidified in their season 3 elimination, Their heart wasn’t in the game without meaningful relationships. Both of them were just seeking connection the entire time they were apart, and I think this has to go back to what I said in the post you mentioned that she made up their entire relationship with them. They both had a lot of regrets about the way their friendship worked before their first real connection in 12 before being separated, and spent so much time dwelling on how they could repair that but weren’t able to yet. So now that they have to chance to build that up again together they’re going to take it. I think the talk with her between Baseball Knife and Suitcase at the start of 15 is indicative of this as well, she questions Baseball about voting out Paintbrush, something she never previously expressed any anger about. But she’s not angry, she just has been thinking about it more. And also, that scene is incredible because I fully expected Lightbulb to be alone and misunderstood by the Grand Slams because they saw none of her development and hardly understood her but they approached her to see if she was doing okay and I was surprised! Very much a necessary step towards her decision in the end.

It is INCREDIBLY difficult for Lightbulb to be straightforward. When she’s clicking the pen that’s a coping mechanismmm and when she’s FORCED to say outright “I’m scared, and I need help.” That’s painful for her. Unnatural. Her behavior and method of presenting herself through quirks can’t just be turned off, it’s baked into who she is. And she doesn’t need to change that, she just needs to be seen and recognized and taken seriously anyway. Which makes it perfect when she chooses to eliminate herself with what else but a lie. It’s too hard for her to say “I don’t want to be here. I want to go back and stay with you all”, so she tests her resolve once and for all despite knowing in her heart she just wants to leave with them. She’s not giving up a million dollars just to go be with Paintbrush and I think that take is a bit degrading towards her character- This decision holds a lot of weight to her and the audience who expected a lot from her over the four years of buildup to her appearance here. But everything I mentioned previously built up to this choice, plus the point Taco had been making about leaving the game spoke to her but she chose to leave in her own way, not for the reasons Taco thought she should. And we see also at the end of the episode “today I think an old friend tried to show us she’s drowning” despite being scared of her earlier in the episode SHE STILL SEES TACO AS AN OLD FRIEND FROM SEASON 1! It’s so good that Lightbulb says that line so juicy. But that goes to show again Lightbulb is extremely observant of others. Also i love all of the ocean lingo and theming with her. I should post the Baxter essay sometime. ANYWAY! The point is Lightbulb didn’t make this choice lightly, she’s been toiling with it for three episodes now. She missed “her crew”. And she was always here for relationships and fun, not for the money or the game. She finally built something, and now she just wants to lay with it. She’s earned her rest.

I also need to mention the Dunce hat. Oh my god. Her exiting the show with a Label announcing her as an idiot, a perception so so many have of her and within the show, her friends previously had of her, but she doesn’t care because there are people who see through that, who see her! Sure she might not be understood by everyone for the way she is, but there are special people in her life who do. Lightbulb is such an incredible character.

I tried to keep this brief but of course it isn’t!! And this still feels like I haven’t said enough. But yes 15 was very good for Lightbulb and a great way to wrap up her story- even if it’s not technically over yet! We’ll see what happens in the movie. Thank you for reading this far!

[tribbetherium]

'The Early Rodentocene, 100 years post-establishment.

Before it was a paradise, it was a hamster hellscape.

Without predators to curb their numbers and a nigh-limitless supply of food, the first hamsters, having escaped the confines of Isla Genesis via land bridges that formed during a period of low sea levels, bred incessantly and exponentially. In the span of a century, they numbered in the hundreds of billions, becoming a tidal wave of hungry nibbling mouths that swept through Nodera, and then Easaterra, Westerna and Ecatoria like a rodent plague of continental proportions. They quickly ravaged the local plant life and introduced invertebrates, reducing once-lush grassland into barren wastes and driving many species of colonists to extinction as their numbers grew unchecked, their consumed biomass converted into even more hungry hamsters.

Eventually, having overrun the still-interconnected four main continents, they finally ran out of food, and began starving en masse: heaps upon heaps of tiny carcasses blanketing the landscape for miles on end and emanating the most terrible smell imaginable all across the land as they decomposed, a nauseating miasma of dead rodent times a hundred billion. And yet, in this putrid panorama of death and decay, some life endured. Fungi and microbes and flies and worms soon returned the nutrients of the dead to the soil, and dormant seeds and insect eggs awaiting the end of the scurrying storm burst back into bloom, nourished by the now richer earth. Trees, boasting lifespans measured in centuries, simply held off producing seeds and filled their leaves with distasteful tannins until the menacing swarms died down. Floating seeds and flying insects, blown across the sea from offshore islands and the unreachable Borealia, blew back inland and colonized the continents once again. And, with a new, enriched environment, new life flourishing once more, the world again became a paradise for the few hardy hamsters that survived the armageddon.

Unfortunately for them, it would eventually happen again, over and over, throughout the subsequent centuries. A pattern of extreme global boom-and-bust cycles of hamster populations defined the earliest days of the Early Rodentocene, as the ecosystem as a whole struggled to keep this rampant invading species under control. Time and time again, life would rebound from the devastation, only to be destroyed by the growing swarms once more within a few decades. As the centuries passed, however, the extreme pressure the hamsters put on the other species of the planet began to fuel their evolution: in a matter of just a few millennia, many plants, especially grasses, developed enormous rhizomes that grew deep underground, which continued to live on even as hamsters ate their leaves and stems. Invertebrates followed suit, laying large amounts of overwintering eggs in secluded places to assure at least some would survive, timing their emergence by evolutionary trial-and-error to times when hamsters were at their fewest. Some early plants became tougher, or more toxic, or thornier, while invertebrates retaliated with thicker exoskeletons, pinching mandibles, and painful stings to deter them from being eaten. Other species played an opposite game: instead satiating the predators with such a huge influx at the breeding season that they could not all be consumed, leaving a small percentage to survive and reproduce. Finally, and perhaps the most significant deterrent to the uncontrollable hordes, were the opportunistic microbes and invertebrates that, in the abundance of rodent hosts, became parasites and pathogens to them: ones that became particularly devastating when dense populations were in close contact, spreading quickly and causing large-scale deaths when numbers were too high.

As easily-accessible food became scarcer and starvation, disease, and competition began to take its toll, the population booms gradually became less and less severe as time went on, and the mass die-offs too became less and less devastating. Soon, new life began to flourish alongside the hamsters, not in spite of them, and, with their population levels now moderated by factors that kept them getting too overcrowded, the hamsters, once invaders, now became a part of the ecosystem. Some plants evolved to spread their seeds by having hamsters hoard them, while others relied on the nutrients spread by their droppings to grow. And by 10,000 years post-establishment, the periodic overpopulations and mass deaths were a thing of the past: balance restored to a biosphere disrupted by an unexpected arrival.

The world had changed to accommodate the newcomers: but the hamsters themselves were changed by this brutal cycle. With survivors sometimes as few as a hundred or so persisting each die-off, the gene pools narrowed and grew and fluctuated: and through rampant inbreeding, or genetic failsafes to combat the deleterious effects of lessened genetic variety, a plethora of mutations would gradually emerge in the once homogenous population: mutations that, with the aid of time and natural selection, became the catalyst that would shape the hamsters' future for the millions of years to come.'

---------

[danhowellz]

whats the 2015 japhan bedgate lol

okay so excuse the very vague details i couldn't find any posts from the time given it was in 2015 lol but it was basically your classic "there was only one bed" theory that people were discussing after the japan vlog was posted.

i'll add some screenshots here an you can deduce for yourself:

i think we decided it was 2 beds pushed close together which i have seen hotels do but i guess we'll never know but what is important is the context of the time and how INSANE this was. bear in mind they'd just announced tatinof/tabinof out of nowhere and then dropped in a liveshow so casually that they were about to go on their dream holiday to japan.

the demon phannie theories were rising at an increasing pace like this truly was The year of the demon phannie and then seeing stuff like this only heightened peoples theorising. like there was so much that came out of this. and this only increased when they went to vidcon/playlist live like it was just the norm to watch any snippet of a vlog we got where we might have seen their bedroom to see if there was one bed or two like it was all part of the fun.

i wanna add onto the end too lol (this has nothing to do with sharing a bed) but the theories that went round at the time that they were holding hands in this clip:

like it was INSANE everyone was convinced they were holding hands and even i was too before rewatching to get these screenshots only to realise phil is just holding a bag ??? which makes it look like hes holding dan's hand

anyway thats japan bedgate. maybe i blew this out of proportion but i was there at the time and i remember seeing so many tweets and posts about it.

[ennard-is-near]

As promised, my thoughts on The Week Before!

(Spoiler free first, spoilers under the cut. Also long post warning)

It was objectively not a good book. Most fun I’ve ever had reading anything, though.

I’m going to start calling him “Ralph Scott” as his full name. At first I hated the name Ralph but it actually grew on me over time. I think Scott is a valid last name and he doesn’t have one in canon so it’s Scott now. I might just call him Phone Guy sometimes though.

If I had to pick one FNaF song to represent this book it would be Stay Calm, absolutely no question. Do with this what you will.

I really enjoy his relationship with the restaurant and animatronics. It’s pretty realistic imo, he always seemed like he was pretty fond of the brand and had loved it and worked there for a long time.

Coppelia is so y/n coded I don’t know how else to explain this. She feels like a self-insert or fan child. Like the way they describe her outfit reminded me of good ol’ Wattpad fic. This is not good or bad, simply a statement. I actually liked her.

Game continuity stuff:

At first it sort of struck me as odd that Ralph says this is his “first week on the night shift” because in FNaF 2 he mentions that he is going to take the shift after Jeremy. But then he mentions that the restaurant closed down after the Bite of ‘87 so it actually sort of makes sense. It took me a minute to figure that out, though.

As I mentioned before, they are mean to Jeremy? This is genuinely hilarious to me. Like at one point Phone Guy mentioned that staff kept saying “You can’t spell team without meat” right after the Bite and his takeaway is just “that’s not very nice but at least they paid attention at orientation.” The first time he brings it up he asks what Jeremy did to provoke the animatronic (my friend said “what was he wearing?” And I think that’s hilarious). He says that the press blew the whole thing way out of proportion but he says that following “he doesn’t talk anymore. Or do much else” so idk man. Ralph just seems more annoyed than anything, like he’s mad it got the restaurant closed down. He does sort of care a little bit, I guess. It depends on what sentence you’re reading.

(My friend also said that it’s sort of the thing you have to joke about, like if that happened at your work you’d have to be an idiot about it [especially bc it was probably over 5 years ago] and while I completely agree, I feel like he’s mean to Jeremy personally a couple times and that’s not very nice. He was just doing his job, man. This is so funny to me genuinely. I will never stop thinking about it)

There were a couple Bite of ‘83 mentions, which I was not expecting, but was very exciting to me. Ralph going up on stage and thinking about why people aren’t allowed up there…he called 1983 on the phone and it was just screaming and Bite of ‘83 audio (and it was different from the games?) which was wild.

I loved that he said they used to call the Bite of ‘83 “The Big Bite” until ‘87 happened. And he likens it to how they used to call WW1 “The Great War” until WW2. Incredible comparison.

Something that I don’t remember Ralph bringing up directly is the MCI. There’s obviously references to it, but I don’t recall him ever going “wow remember when those kids went missing?” Like he does with The Bites. Not a huge deal but definitely a small thing I noticed.

It’s me. It’s me. It’s me. It’s me. It’s me. The way they wrote the it’s me thing actually sent me to hell and back. Some interesting implications as to what that could mean if it’s happening to Ralph too. I think the way it was described the “it’s me” echo like, taking up his whole mind and actually hurting is so fascinating to me. It’s me. It’s me. It’s me.

He refers to himself as “Phone Guy” at one point, or at least says that that’s what other employees call him because he records the training tapes and welcome messages. I actually liked that, it was late at night when I read it but my sleep deprived brain thought it was a cool nod to the fandom.

He also records the messages for Michael (/the next employee) in the books, which is so fun. They used the word-for-word transcript from the games which I also thought was really cool. I’ve always been a fan of those opening phone calls, his FNaF 1 stuff makes you really get attached to the guy and then he fucking dies which is always deviating. Putting them in exactly like the games was a good call.

Also also his night four message recording was really well written actually. It might have been my favorite part of the whole book. Him talking to Coppelia in a non-canon death was really sweet too

They mentioned Susie being Chica and Jeremy being Bonnie by name. I like this. Ralph saying Susie just by vibes was fine, but I kinda want to know how Bronwen knew that Jeremy is Bonnie? Like I know she’s done a lot of research but how does she know which specific kid is which specific animatronic? That seems like a hard thing to figure out, even if you know everything about the case. Eh, whatever.

They kept just… listing the animatronics? Like the book will go “Look out for Freddy, Bonnie, Chica and Foxy.” Over and over again. Like yeah, I got it.

Phone Guy

They made him a boy failure. And a lame dad. Absolutely perfect. He says the same stupid fucking joke every time even though nobody’s around. He practices making stupid jokes and puns so he can tell them to his daughter later.

He loves his daughter so much, also. Like all he thinks about her all the time and he checks on her immediately when he gets home. He wants work at her school? He keeps telling her never ever to go to Freddy’s. In the non-canon death where he calls her and he says, “I love you. Don’t come looking for me.” Aughhggg.

A couple of his deaths were genuinely so funny. The one where he’s just mixing shit in the closet and the door gets jammed? That wasn’t even an animatronic that’s just basic workplace safety. The one where he’s being killed (by Chica I think?) and his blood is going all over the floor and he goes “I just cleaned that!” Hey man, there are more important things happening. The one where he puts the cupcake up to his face and it like…eats him? Why did he do that?

There are also a couple non-death endings that are great. The one where he just accidentally gets locked in a room is pretty good. He can get sued by Fazbear which is really funny. Coppelia can get eaten by The Cupcake which is iconic.

Foxy is his favorite. We find this out when he’s being killed by Foxy and he goes “But you were my favorite!” Foxy is also Michael’s favorite. Also nobody asked but he would have been mine if I was a kid at Freddy’s.

I like when he walks in to a room covered in blood and goes “It must have been an animal!” You and I both know it wasn’t, why did he say that? Also he throws about the blood.

Other characters

Coppelia is so good. She’s so middle-schooler and I mean that in a good way. She’s well written in a “that’s what twelve-year-olds are like” way. During the ending where he calls her and says he loves her and she goes “I know, Dad” like she’s rolling her eyes. Okay go off Coppelia. But also she clearly loves her dad she’s just a preteen. I don’t like that Phone Guy calls her Pel, though. That’s stupid.

I don’t like Bronwen. She’s underdeveloped and as she stands in the book just completely unnecessary. She’s a cool character in theory, a reporter who’s obsessed with the mystery at Freddy’s, but she probably couldn’t work in a book like this. I feel like her only purpose was to give Ralph a quest, phone and dead body to find. He probably could have gotten those things on his own, and it actually would have been better for his character I think. She feels like a self-insert character from someone who won a “get your own character featured in a book” contest. She’s not hugely important or prevalent in the plot, to the point where she could be cut and it would probably make the story better. But as her own character, in a book where she was a main or very prominent side character, she could be very interesting. She’s just not here.

WILLIAM AFTON?? Okay, well, maybe. Probably. He’s only in there a couple times, as “Dave” the maintenance guy who knows everything about the animatronics and is annoyed that you called him at 4am. Definitely William Afton, which is very cool and interesting that he’s still around and slaying at the time of FNaF 1. Idk if I’m going to include that in my personal brain timeline but whatever, still good info to have.

Williams presence does raise a question that has always bugged me, how do people not recognize him? Like I get that maybe it’s like Clark Kent where you’re not looking for William Afton so you won’t recognize him, but I feel like this is a little different. Because Dave Miller isn’t some unassuming maintenance worker while William Afton is some huge famous, supervillain or something. Dave Miller is a guy who knows everything about the animatronics and William Afton is the guy who made the animatronics. And they look the same? He’s not even bothering with glasses or anything. And Phone Guy has to have seen William a few times because he’s implied to be higher up (at least a manager or something) at the company in 1987 so he has to have seen William a few times. And Ralph’s gone bowling with “Dave” before, so why was he never like “Huh I wonder if this is William Afton considering they look the same and have the same job and nobody has seen Afton in a long time.” He’s so Sweeney Todd core.

There’s a brief mention of a character named Mrs. Anderson who has a dead daughter, and to me that daughter is Susie. (Not Cassidy bc I have a different family for Cassidy that I can’t get into rn but trust me.) But that’s so sad actually, that she is basically Coppelia’s babysitter bc she misses her own daughter. I feel like something that FNaF could benefit from is more little character insights like this. Just getting a brief “Mrs. Anderson” and seeing how she’s handling her kid dying. This could not be Susie’s mom, and I’m just seeing connections where there aren’t any, but I think she probably is meant to be.

Okay I’m done

I really liked this book guys. It was worth sneaking a copy of into my house. I had so much fun with it, even if I just read it back-to-front like a normal book instead of “playing” it. (Idk why they kept pretending it was a video game, it’s clearly a book, but whatever.) there were a few very fun details that I really loved and it was a good addition to the canon of the series. I won’t incorporate everything into the lore I made up in my head, but I will definitely take some of it. I really enjoyed it, I really did.

[borathae]

hey! i don't understand what is happening rn... i tried reading a few articles but i can easily make out that it's fucked up propaganda and are highly biased. ik that yoongi got in a case. i've seen the vid too so ik that it isn't THAT BIG OF DEAL. so idfk know wtf is happening at this point. cud u break it down pls? I wouldn't mind a link to a genuine article that's just facts...

thnx!! much luv ✨️

On the 6th of August, Yoongi drove around 500m on an electric scooter (something like this, not the correct model idk the correct one but something like this) from a restaurant he had dinner at to his house. He drove on the sidewalk in a straigth line, very slowly and carefully then when he took a turn into his apartment's street, he fell. He wore a helmet and the only person "who could have gotten hurt" was himself but he didn't. He got up right away but three patrolling officers saw him and confronted him. They suspected him to be drunk, so they did a breath analyser test and the results came out to something under 0,08% (idk the exact results, but they were under this number or this number exact. and to give a perspective, that's around the number you have after one and a half beer) and because of that, he got fined and his scooter license revoked. The punishment was done. The case was closed.

Or so we all thought.

Yoongi instantly came onto Weverse and confessed. HE WAS THE FIRST PERSON WE EVEN HEARD OF THIS INCIDENT FROM!!! HE LEGITEMATELY WAS THE FIRST AND HE APOLOGISED RIGHT AWAY!!!!

And it should have been done by then. He apologised, he got the legal punishment and IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN DONE BY THEN.

But it wasn't. South Korean Media (aka Satan's spawn which came outta his asshole) blew it out of proportions, they spread false information, spread falls cctv videos, spread lies about him in his service, slandered his name and shamed him. They literally tried to fucking murder his public image and many "ARMYs" jumped on the hate train as well (they're another species of Satan's asshole spawn). Obviously Knetz did as well because they're jobless, loveless assholes. They wanted him to apologise over and over again, wanted him to leave BTS, wanted him jailed, wanted him dead. It is literally fucking insane.

It came that far that it has been literally almost a month and it's still going on (bear in mind, Yoongi was the first person who dropped the news on the night of it happening and he apologised right away and took responsibility. It should have ended with that).

Then on the 23rd of August he was called to the police station because the entire backlash started an investigation (like WTF???) and K-media reporters were illegally (or legaly? please correct me if I'm wrong) waiting in front of the station, bombarding him with cameras and making him publicly apologise for everything (I thankfully didn't see anything about it except one video on tiktok I had forced onto my FYP about him literally bowing while too many camera flashes went off. I reported and blocked this account so fast, seeing this video upset me so much).

It should have been over then, fuck it never even should have come that fucking far, but it wasn't.

Now today, Yoongi comes online and writes this heartbreaking apology letter and it breaks my fucking heart. It should have been over when he wrote that first post, he got legally punished and he apologised. It should have been over then, but instead it escalated into this.

If you want to help check out Cam's twitter page, she has templates we can send to companies etc. which will help Yoongi. Also check out Min Suga HQ and their template. And keep reporting people who spread hateful lies about him on social media. Please don't share any pictures/videos about the incident or police station and don't engage with these accounts except for reporting & blocking them.

Let's keep sending him loving messages on Weverse and stream/buy his music! istfg I wanna do so much more for him, but at least like this we can show him that he is loved 💜 let's keep fighting for him and showing him love 💜

I hope he is surrounded by people who truly love him and that he finds some sort of rest soon 💜

[evilspiritweek]

Super quick online activity tier list.

Notes:

Treating "Facebook" as weird catch all. Like- technically you have social media, but it's kinda sort of just there

Some of these characters wouldn't have access to the internet (Plop Plop, Sorcerer, etc.) but if we gave them the internet as a treat, I imagine this is how they would react.

more thoughts underneath

Heidi: Appeals to the masses, so while I thought she wouldn't be super into the going ons of the internet, she's so obsessed with it I think she'd find herself going into rabbit holes. Definitley would have a drama channel on youtube, but any drama there is for chronically online people; if she brought it up IRL, I think ppl would see something wrong with her <3

Theresa: I think all of Der Monster Klub is chronically online to some degree, Theresa's no exception. At the same time, she'd be good at hiding it, mainly because then she'd have people from her school finding out about her tumblr.

Julian: is in the same area, although, I think he would also be surfing tumblr in public.

Levandar: Terminally online, but that's because he more so ego searches and sees what his fans are posting. In turn, he's probably not only seen the deprave stuff his fans would post about himself, but also the other fandoms their in.

Stevens: I think would just be a shitposter. Don't really have a specific niche in mind for him because I think he could go into really any sector of the internet and

Sorcerer: does not have internet access, but I can see the potential, you know? Would send anon hate like it's a living, because when you're trapped under a high school for hundreds of years it probably is. Unrealistic, but I think he would get into weird niche tik tok drama just for the fun of it.

Daves: like,, a normal amount, but that's because he doesn't really interact much? Outside of the Der Monster Klub, I imagine he would just lurk. That being said, he is definitely privy to the weirdest internet rabbit holes

Ignoring how busy he is with being a ninja, Randy would probs be online a regular amount. Definitely posts random youtube videos, but he's like,, trying to be youtuber so uploads are sporadic. Also, this boy does touch grass. He seems to want to be active in the social life of high school and that means hanging out in person rather than blogging on tumblr lol

Howard: Same level as Randy, but I can also see this guy trying his hand at streaming. Sporadically does it with no set schedule and it's only ever Randy and a few other people in chat, but like. It's fun. they're teenagers.

Bash: Normal amount? I don't think I have a lot to say on him, really. posts like,, pictures of all the stuff he owns to flex, but that's what any rich teenager would do. Would say something dumb online, but it never really blows out of proportion.

Brent: I think he'd really only post his work. Would occasionally vent too. Blew up at some random person who left a hate comment, making it his sworn duty of the day to make them just as miserable.

Debbie: I think she's not super social and really would keep up with her friends and like, the school accounts. That being said, I can see her running the social media for the news club too, that's where her passion lies afterall. Thinks about making a news/commentary youtube channel, but just doesn't have the time

Marci: I was initially going to put her down as a Facebook mom, and while she does have one, I also see her almost being like one of those Instagram influencer moms too. She does have the status already, so I think it would just come naturally to her. Thankfully, because she's already rich, she wouldn't try shilling you an MLM. Def follows her son on social media, but doesn't comment because Bash said it's embarrassing.

Flute Girl: Tumblr user, but not in trenches, you know? Runs several aesthetic blogs for each of her interests, but actually is sane enough to just block and move on. Could also see her writing fanfic, but most of it doesn't get posted because she might be a bit self conscious

P: I think bros neat design wise, so while I don't have many thoughts on him, I wanted to include him lol

Plop Plop: if this guy had social media, I think he'd be into the DIY stuff, for some reason? Never really posting his own tutorials, but always there to comment and help others out on forums

Rachel: Normal amount. Pinterest board game goes CRAZY. One of those cute aesthetic tumblrs, but genuinely a nice person. Avoids drama at all costs

Doug: Get the vibe his parents would restrict internet access. That being said, could also see him on Reddit, so..?

McFist: I don't think he would use social but instead pay someone to post McFist posts both for himself and his businesses. Does not understand it and is a very busy man.

Slimovitz: Just has a Facebook. Reposts minion memes and cat photos. He used to post about his car, but then a student found it and turned it into a meme showing the before and after of it's destruction one day. He put a ban on phones for a bit. They never found the culprit.

Bucky: Also probably had restricted internet for a while. Interested in getting a social media, but they say he has to be above 16. I imagine he'd actually want to post band videos, though, so that'd be nice

Jacques: He does have parkour videos, but I don't think he actually likes talking online. Touches grass.

Sorceress: I think she'd be on social media like any "teen" would, but I don't think she'd get it. Posts selfies, but also doesn't really post them enough

Viceroy: I just imagine this guy goes on engineering or science related forums and solves problems, but he'd like,, also be the dude that would message the answer directly to the initial poster so when you find the forum 10 years later for your very specific problem, the answer isn't there. Could also be on tumblr to and while he says he's above it, would start shit online (or at the very least keep tabs on it to watch from afar).

Juggo: I can't see him on social media, but like,, frequent poster in clown related forums and accounts? Would answer weird clown trivia questions and is a respectable member in the historical clown community.

McAffee: Business has a Facebook that hasn't been updated for several years because he keeps forgetting about it. Also would occasionally post on youtube, but I feel he really shines nestled deep within the comments of a random youtube video he got mad at. The comment was about how the Star Wars prequels suck and by the 100th comment, it's moved onto furry discourse.

Morgan: I think she lurks more than anything. Her account has nothing and if you ever see her, it's one of the other members of dancing fish posting and her showing up in the video (I also think I just make Morgan more mysterious than she actually is lol)

Ranginald Bagel: Goofy guy with next to no internet access. If he did, he would sadly

S. Ward Smith: I can't even see this man on any like specfic welding forums online.

Finja: I think even if we gave him internet access, he'd actively avoid it. He's got other shit to do. Doesn't understand the youth's slanguage. Like that one post where that person shows Fortnite to an Ancient Roman that I can't find for the life of me, someone PLEASE GIVE IT TO ME BEGGING

[sophieinwonderland]

Today is the day I make one lucky cringizen's dream come true!

I've had this screenshot saved for over a month, knowing this day would come! So congrats little cringizen, your wish is finally granted!

Because I'm going to talk about Aspen's bullying of Custom-Emojis, and recount my two minutes in Aspen's server!

So let's see if I can sum this up. Aspen, an anti-endo TikToker, goes into the Custom-Emojis server. She barely says or does anything there. She gets banned for conduct in other places. Rather than moving on, Aspen plays victim while mocking people's triggers, and says she was banned for saying hi.

You can find the story from Custom-Emojis here:

Aspen escalated and is now allegedly openly admitting to bullying Custom-Emojis.

I do say allegedly because these screenshots are from r/systemscringe and I don't actually know what the context is for that second one. But if it's legit, yikes!

Now, I normally wouldn't get involved in this drama. Mostly because I think both parties behaved pretty poorly. Aspen blew a ban out of proportion instead of just moving on, and chose to mock people's triggers in retaliation for banning her. Obviously terrible. But... I also don't support Custom-Emojis following up by telling people to mass report her TikTok. Both seem like massive overreactions that only furthered the conflict.

There are no mature adults in the room.

So why am I talking about this?

Well you see, I have a funny story to share!

See, a while back, when r/systemscringe added Aspen to their hit list, I wanted to see what the deal with her server was. Was it really as bad as r/systemscringe claimed?

So... I joined it... just to see.

I never actually got to find out!

While casually scanning, before posting anything at all, I read people talking about me just joining. They recognized my name. A few were explaining to the mods who I was and that I was an endogenic systems. I think they mentioned I was a tulpa too.

One of them even mentioned following this blogs for the laughs. Which, if you're here now, hi! 🙋‍♀️

And then, everything went black. Well, gray. Point is, I was kicked from the server! Instantly! In what was probably less than 5 minutes having said absolutely nothing!

All for the crime of being an endogenic system.

And at the time, I didn't comment on it. It seemed... disadvantageous. r/systemscringe was focused on Aspen. Aspen and her server was focused on r/systemscringe. Why interrupt that? Why get in the way of ableist anti-endo factions tearing each other apart?

But with this latest incident, I had to talk about the sheer hypocrisy of Aspen's community at being outraged over Aspen getting banned while doing the same exact things!

It's just too funny to not point out the hypocrisy of Aspen and her followers!

Wait... Aspen's Here?

Okay, so everything above I wrote Thursday or Friday. I didn't post then because other things were going on and I wasn't quite ready to get dragged into the drama. Then surprise, Aspen made a new Tumblr! And one of her first acts was invading inclusive tags.

Expanding on what this anon says, the pluralgang tag isn't merely where endogenic systems hang out. It's a tag that was made explicitly for the inclusive plural community.

As a reminder, the "plural" label originated from non-disordered system, and has always been inclusive to all plurals for nearly 30 years. The plural community is our community. And hate isn't welcome here.

Oh, did I mention she tosses around ableist slurs?

Putting aside the blatant ableism against people with schizophrenia with that slur, let's reiterate that the existence of non-disordered and endogenic plurality is back by actual psychiatrists. This is not schizophrenia. It is not a mental disorder.

Transgender Mental Health by Eric Yarbrough explicitly states that you can be plural without trauma or a disorder.

This is a book that was peer reviewed and published by the American Psychiatric Association.

The ICD-11 states you can experience the presence of multiple "distinct personality states" (the same term it uses for alters) without a disorder in their entry on DID.

The existence of non-disordered and endogenic plurality is FACT!

And anyone who says otherwise is either ignorant or lying.

...

...

...

Oh, and since I'm sure this post will get around to r/systemscringe and one or both of its servers, be sure to check out my debunk of r/systemscringe's lies while you're here. 😉

Also, as always when an anti-endo invades inclusive and pro-endo tags, my response is going into anti-endo tags. If any anti-endos don't like this, please take it up with Aspen. I'll respect boundaries as long as the boundaries of our community is respected. Otherwise... 🤷‍♀️

[anarchistartistvt]

honestly I think it’s pretty fucked up how much shit I got over my post.

“hey wait a second these Reddit discussions might be onto something-“ “YOU PEDO DEFENDER DELETE THE POST KILL YOURSELF GRAHHHHHH”

The shitty part is that I didn’t even actively seek out this info. my now ex was posting the Reddit shit in a discord server I owned, and I was like “wait whoa they might be onto something here”. Given it was already on Reddit I figured more people knew but god damn it was like I opened Pandora’s box.

Won’t say I didn’t fuck things up for myself and my friends. Someone tried to doxx my friend daenumao (unsuccessfully thank fuckin god), and I was too stubborn to delete the posts the minute things blew out of proportion. I thought I could handle it. I had gone through shit similar to this before, what with StickyBM trying to accuse me of a parasocial freak and Jordy claiming I doxxed them(only to find out it was their discord tag that got leaked). I thought I was doing the right thing. I knew how detrimentally destructive allegations could be, fake or not.

I sort of named my ex in there because I didn’t want to claim credit for what I had found. It wasn’t to throw her under the bus, and as soon as she asked me to delete the credit part, I did.

In a friend server I was in, I was being pinged about the situation nonstop. People were telling me to delete it, and it just felt like silencing me. I was getting harassed left and right. Someone started threatening me on tumblr(a platform I rarely used until now), people started bringing up fake or already resolved shit about me(had to clear that up on a fuckin Reddit thread), and basically everything started crumbling and falling apart.

Finally one of my friends pinged me and was like “delete the posts or I’m blocking you, don’t make me do this”. I had already set dms to friends only by that point, after hearing daenumao was being threatened. I got angry, unfriended her, and left the server. Shortly after, a couple friends sent messages saying they were cutting ties and to never contact them again. Then my girlfriend messaged me saying she was leaving me.

Right now I’m sort of trapped on what I can say without breaking boundaries of anyone. I never meant to invalidate the victims. At the time, my only intention was to raise awareness of “hey this is kinda inconclusive, you might wanna take a look at this”. I didn’t think it would blow up to the point I would get death threats and death wishes.

In a court of law, both sides are to share their experiences. The experience really just told me that the justice system of twitter is fucked beyond comprehension. The victims were quick to attack anyone who doubted their claims, and had no problem siccing their supporters onto anyone who didn’t fall in line. It honestly felt like I was being told, “SUPPORT THE VICTIMS OR DIE”. People are allowed to have doubts, and while I can understand where the victims were coming from, they didn’t care to show much proof denying some claims. One of the alleged victims even said “so many big names are supporting me so I’m right.” Bro what?

When I attempted suicide, it was for a lot of reasons. I have bad anxiety and getting attacked the way I was back there sent everything into overdrive. Not to mention losing about 95% of my friends over this crap. I was only on twitter mainly because I had friends there and would chat with them regularly. I don’t have many friends in real life and I’ve always been kind of a loner. So to see my support system fall apart over this, especially because I have HORRIBLE abandonment issues, fucked with my head.

I’m not happy as a person. I’ve been depressed for years and I’m not proud of it. I’ve been through more fucked up shit in my life than I can even begin to process. Growing up in a broken family, being treated like shit by my stepmother and put through so much abuse, flunking out of high school and falling through the cracks, running away at 19 and immediately being raped and molested by someone I saw like an older brother, being sexually and emotionally abused by an ex who blamed me for being raped, moving out of my aunts house only to be institutionalized from a suicide attempt 4 months later, being in the homeless system, being treated like shit by the government programs, being doxxed and swatted and harassed and had deepfakes made of me, possibly having a condition that means I’m likely to be dead from suicide by the age of 34, etc. Like, I’ve genuinely been through hell and back and a lot of people know it. Maybe more people than I should be telling.

I tend to over share, I vent too much, I go into slumps quickly, and overall I’m a fucking mess mentally. I had gone into a bad psychotic breakdown last week due to trauma and a bad reaction to new meds, so my mental state wasn’t exactly the best when this shit even started. By this point I was already having a sinking feeling that my girlfriend was planning on leaving me, and then a few days later she hit her breaking point.

When I typed up that final post, I genuinely didn’t know if I wanted to keep living. Hearing someone I was close to saying “you better stay alive because you deserve to live with what you did” was horrifying.

I’m a coward, without a doubt. I wanted out. But not from just this. I wanted out from everything. The few people who I was close to, or even people who had tolerated me to an extent, had basically told me to go fuck myself. It quite literally felt like I had lost everything.

I got ahold of some Tylenol and started filling up the bathtub. I had planned to overdose in the tub, hoping that if I went into a seizure from the medication, being submerged in water would limit the chances of me pulling out of said seizure. I’ve only attempted a few times in my life, so you can’t bash me too hard for not knowing how to do it.

As I started undressing, my iPad started ringing with a FaceTime audio call. It was my dad.

Somehow the situation found its way to him and he reached out to check on me. I don’t know if one of my friends contacted him, if he was already monitoring my accounts, or if it had just blown up that badly that even he(someone who doesn’t use twitter or own an account) had seen it. I tried to sound normal because it’s pretty rare for him to call me, but when he started bringing up what he saw, I broke down sobbing.

I explained everything to him, that I just wanted to help, and that I thought I was doing the right thing, and he told me to limit my social media exposure, because of how unhealthy it was becoming for me. I didn’t mean to hurt anyone with my actions. I worded things wrong and handled it badly, and I will wholeheartedly apologize for that. He explained to me that it was good that I wanted to do the right thing, but it wasn’t good to screw over my own mental health over this shit. He advised me to limit my social media usage to only those I could trust.(scary thing is, I didn’t know who all I COULD trust)While on call, I tried to deactivate my account but couldn’t because I forgot my fuckin password. All I could do is private my account and go dormant.

A few people reached out in Twitter dms and I spoke with many of them. They were extremely kind and supportive, and redirected me to the Mandela Catalogue Reddit forum, where I was welcomed in. I’ve been staying there, as well as occasionally posting on Tumblr. I’m scared to even touch my Twitter account with a 10 ft pole, and discord interactions have been next to none. I considered rebranding but I didn’t want to feel like I was trying to sneak my way out of accountability. I was just threatened and bashed so fuckin much that I didn’t feel safe interacting as myself, Anarchist Artist.

A bunch of people were screaming at me for linking Reddit threads and saying “YOU CANT TRUST REDDIT ITS FULL OF LIES” you’re literally using twitter which is probably WORSE when it comes to misinformation.

I never intended to fall down this rabbit hole of who’s right or who’s wrong. I will apologize for how I handled things and how I worded my post, but I will not apologize for speaking up about a story full of holes. For the victims to bully someone into submission is not mature or appropriate, and they should be held accountable as such. I have no intention of clearing my name, I have no intention to regain my friends or close ones, and I have no intention of saying “HA HA I TOLD YOU SO”. I just want shit to go back to even a slight semblance of normalcy.

Even if the victims’ stories are truthful to an extent, they way they have approached all of this is horrible and I’m upset that they endorsed harassing anyone who didn’t fall in line.

I’ll be here for now, but won’t post much. Everything is still a mess and I’m still concerned for my safety.

[kumezyzo]

can i get a little scenario where reader and sapnap were at an award show and they are secretly dating. that’s why during the show they met in the backstage to make out in secret BUT some staff saw them and took a pic to post it online and the next day they gotta explain ut on live

this has been in my inbox for too long. but thank you sm for requesting this!!! fem!reader.

anyway enjoy. or dont :) m.list

You looked down at you phone nervously, prepareing to announce the winner of the next award. you swiped out out of your messages, going over your two sentences worth of lines.

suddenly, a pair of arms wrapped around you. you jolted and turned around to see your boyfriend in his all black suit, grinning at you. you rolled your eyes and reached up to rest your hands on his shoulders.

"i thought you didnt see my text," you tell him as you move your hands up to his neck.

"i was just tryna find my way back here," he glanced down at your lips. "i had to come calm my girl down just a bit."

you smiled and leaned in to touch your lips to his. he grinned into the kiss, licking lightly at your bottom lip. when you slightly parted you lips, he brought your bottom lip into his mouth, lightly sucking on it before pulling away.

He had a blush on his face paired with a dopey smile, "good luck, baby. you'll do great."

"I didnt think i could fuck up two sentences even if i tried," you giggle as you step away. he shrugs and looks you up and down, obviously checking you out.

"yn?" you both looked towarss the sound of the voice, a young woman standing there nervously. "this is the envelope. youre on in a few minutes."

they hand you the black envelope, looking ebtween you and nick, "sorry but visitors should be going back to their seats now."

"right, my bad," he said as he smiled. "good luck!"

Not even two days later, an article surfaced on twitter with the caption, 'Sapnap and Yn Seen Together at Award Show!"

at first, you thought its was a stupid gossip site that blew out of proportion the meaning of you two sitting so close together. but when it began gaining more traction and people were starting to tweet and send it to you two, you decided it was worth reading.

the main media was a video of you two not even a second before you two started kissing backstage. you watched the video with your heart racing. it felt violating knowing someone was watching you when you thought you were alone.

"who the fuck even filmed the video," clay asked to no on in particular. the four of you were standing around the kitchen island. you had all strangely found eachother only a few hours after the article was posted.

"i think it was the staff that came in to give me the fucking envelope," you said, blankly staring at the marble pattern of the counter top.

"i dont think it matters now, people know now," george said as if trying to mediate the situation. "you have to say something."

"this is such bullshit," nick said in frustration as he looked at you from across the kitchen island.

"yea, but theres nothing you can do now," clay reiterated. "make a statement and dont post shit for a bit."

"to adress the rumours, yn and i are dating," nick said to the camera in defeat. you two sat next to eachother, accepting that you had to film this video. both of you appearing visibly annoyed. "we dont really care about anyones opinions on our relationship because its really none of your business."

you scoffed and shook your head, "this isnt the way we would have ever planned or expected this to go, but sadly, here we are," you took in a deep breath. "this is all we have to say for now. and respectfully... fuck off."

this is short but ive been so dizzy and reading/writing is hard. so i hope you enjoyed -Nony

[damnfandomproblems]

745575895203479552 Agreeing with this. A lot of the comments reminded me of how one of my family members would learn I didn't want to do something with them one day, then blew it out of proportion and went "oh, I guess I should just never do anything nice for you ever". Full on catastrophizing and warping the situation into something it wasn't, and it made them look very melodramatic and inaccurate. Of course they ended up being diagnosed with borderline but that stuff happens with people who don't have borderline too and it's so annoying. Folks, if you're reading one thing and interpreting something completely different, that's bad. Nobody will be able to have an actual dialogue with you.

Posting since this is a response to this previous ask.

[ko-existing]

Yeah, I sent that message to Bry because she was the only one posting about these anons attacking you guys...as far as I'm concerned. I haven't been here in a while.

I don't really wanna private message anyone. Sophie can privately message you if she so desires.

Further, as far as Sophie and I discussed, like yeah...you guys just had different styles of sharing ideas. Sure we can all get butthurt sometimes. But, it wasn't anything personal, ultimately, a social media tiff lol. I imagine that post is deleted?

Does it really matter anymore? Do you expect Sophie to still be raging by a tiff?

Im not gonna say anymore, it's none of my business. But the anons sending so much hate: you guys need to stop and go within. Sophie wouldn't want this for y'all. Its deplorable behavior...her and ada are gone, rely on yourself...

[neutral but more confused tone]

I'm not sure what you discussed with her but dming me and agreeing about the "there is no ego, this post is limited" story on Instagram that was meant in a neutral way but then going to tumblr, switching and saying "you're speaking from the ego, i'm so disappointed, you sound jealous of her" and making it sound like I'm attacking Ada which I originally never did within 1-2hours which resulted in her devouted deciples living in my ask box since the very start of this account to now and never saying anything about it and sendings asks anonymously about topics only she could knew about from our IG dms which were personal, doesn't sound very "different styles of sharing ideas & nothing personal" to me. How can I be jealous of someone I don't know? I asked afterwards on IG who Ada is and people told me. That's the thing that confuses me here. How can I speak from something that doesn't exist fundamentally? They talked about ND/AV but contradicted themselves with ego-related posts and concepts. Pointing that out is not an attack. I never attacked Ada, I never even knew her to begin with but Sophie's reblog was the catalyst of everything else that followed to this day that blew everything out of proportion. She knew I wasn't attacking her because that's what I said in the audio back then on IG. Disagreeing with someone does not mean attacking them. She knew her followers were camping in our inbox (not just this account) for months and stayed silent and now says it wasn't anything actually? After she (Sophie) left for a reason her anons didn't know, people started blaming Chen for it and no one said a thing. A follower on IG sent me a message asking what my opinion of this post is, i replied and AFTER i found out it's from tumblr, i made an account too. Another thing is, I don't fully understand why you operate as a middleman for her. You said in Bry's message that Anons should stop speaking for her, but aren't you speaking for her or in her name anonymously too? I'm not angry, just confused as to what exactly she told you and why it clashes with the actual situation and the reactions of it

[mcytblr-archive]

Early MCYTblr Interviews: leftistgnf

today's interviewee (after far too long letting this sit in my drafts) is leftistgnf/marg, also known for running the gnflegalteam blog! they were kind enough to answer my laundry list of questions, and i'm excited to finally share them with you all!

Q: What do you remember about the mcytblr awards?

A: omg i hope this isn’t a disappointing way to start but i actually remember very little about these. were these the ones angie markets did? i just remember attempts to make mcytblr-wide events like this usually got complained about because the fandom was too big lol.

Q: What was the gnflegalteam blog?

A: probably the most poorly-aging part of my digital footprint 😭sometime in late 2021 i started doing a bit on my blog where i’d roleplay as a lawyer defending george from the gay allegations. on april fools day 2022 i made a sideblog with this fake press release about how we lost our case and needed help with the appeal and people started sending asks and it became a whole little side project. it was honestly pretty fun! people who already didn’t really fuck with me called it parasocial, but so was everything we were all doing all the time. unfortunately it is gone forever now…. after the story about george sexually assaulting caiti became public i made a final post telling him to kill himself and someone reported it and tumblr deleted the sideblog LMAO. it was a pretty fitting way for it to go out.

Q: What was the "drama stream" that you and Hari streamed?

A: HAHAHA okay this was like, summer 2022 i think? i had made this channel with the gnflegalteam username just to talk in sol’s twitch chat, with no intention of ever streaming, but hari and i began kicking around the idea of doing a “””drama stream””” where we’d mostly talk about cc drama. i’m not sure how to best describe this but: we, and our friends, tended to disagree with the dtblr majority on a lot of controversies. and dtblr could be really vicious when you had differing opinions! even on inconsequential stuff like lore takes! so people already saw me and hari as being toxic and controversial, just because we held those differing opinions, and i guess i felt like i didn’t have anything to lose by talking about it all at once.

admittedly we clickbaited it a lot and probably flew too close to the sun and hari made a very uhhh.. inflammatory advertisement for it. but looking back i don’t think we actually talked about anything THAT crazy. like i said, most of the “drama” was related to creators or the dsmp and not other tumblr users. there was a group of blogs who specifically planned a stream at the same time as ours and made posts about choosing positivity or something, which blew what we were doing way out of proportion and created its own unnecessary drama. but the stream itself, after all the angry anons we got leading up to it, was a lot of fun. it attracted a lot more attention than i ever expected. i infamously got connoreatspants to react to a raid from a channel called “gnflegalteam,” which was probably one of my favorite moments of my whole mcytblr experience.

Q: What was it like to be in 404blr?

A: 404blr, especially in the earlier days, was nice because there were so few of us who actually considered themselves “”george mains.”” george never streamed and was barely even active on social media so a lot of the community bonding happened over content droughts. i remember a lot of thinkpieces on the trajectory of his career and these floods of desperate “i miss george” posts. also, i know you didn’t ask about 404cord but i want to mention it briefly because basically everyone on 404blr ended up joining in the first couple of days. before all the drama it was really just 404blr people, plus a couple dream stans who also really liked george. it used to be very fun and normal!

imo most of the conflict surrounding 404blr happened when we fought with other subblrs. there was definitely a clash between dream/dnf mains and george mains, because they would really mischaracterize and over-sexualize george in ways that felt weird to us. in the context of shipping, george was always portrayed as this blushing virginal twinkish nymphomaniac. in general a lot of self-proclaimed dnf/dream team mains were really just dream mains who liked george as the other half of a ship and didn’t really care about him as a person. honestly, we were always just on a soapbox trying to convince people that george was a fun interesting good streamer.

it’s complicated to look back on because obviously i think george is really fucking gross now, which colors all my memories of being a fan of his. i don’t know that i still agree with my past self about him being particularly good at streaming either. but i met a lot of friends through 404blr and generally think about that specific community fondly

Q: Why was Hari in people's blocklists?

A: hmm i won’t say too much about this just because it’s not my exposé to give. but like early 2021, when i had just joined mcytblr, there was this discord server that hari was in, and they had a conflict that escalated to the point of some members putting her and “her supporters” in their dnis. it was really bizarre because they talked about her like she was a problematic content creator and not a friend they fought with. i was mutuals with a couple of the people who were mad at her and they were vagueposting like she killed their entire family. iirc everyone involved was very young at the time, which i think explains a lot of how that went down.

Q: Do you think there was an overlap between inniters and 404blr?

A: yes thanks to me! JUST KIDDING. i personally was a big clingy duo fan so i followed a lot of inniters and ended up being friends with a lot of inniters, but most of them didn’t really gaf about george. a lot of inniters (sbi fandom in general) didn’t like dream and really didn’t like rpf so we were a little star-crossed… i can’t speak for innitblr as a whole but there were definitely jokes among my mutuals about a couple of us being token george mains or token dnfers. because george (at the time) was kind of controversy-free and also interacted a lot with the uk dsmp creators, i think it was easier for them to let 404blr into their hearts than like, dreamblr or dtblr.

on the other side, a lot of dtblr people hated inniters because they were critical of dream, or because they had such different opinions on lore. i was constantly getting anons asking me why i was friends with certain blogs who had made fun of dream before. so i guess idk if crossover is the right word because it was more like, three or four dnfers who really liked tommy and shamefully showed up at the doorstep of innitblr asking not to be softblocked. thank you spider enclosure for extending that grace to me.

Q: What was it like on the inniter side of Tumblr?

A: my personal experience with innitblr was great! obviously a lot of them felt apathetic or negative towards george or the dream team but that was never really an issue for me i guess -- all my mutuals’ criticisms were pretty fair, even back when i disagreed with them. i remember the community itself being really funny and a lot less volatile than dtblr or even 404blr. they were also way more invested in lore, which was another draw for me because i was always a huge lorehead. tbh i probably posted as much about clingy duo as i did about the dream team so i was basically a part time inniter anyways. that being said, innitblr skewed a little younger than dtblr so i was never as involved in the community. but i always loved interacting with them and i’m still friends with a lot of my (ex-)innitblr mutuals. most of spider enclosure (for example) are still on tumblr and just post about like doctor who and shit.

Q: What were some positive things you remember from that time?

A: like i’ve mentioned: i made a lot of really really great friends who i still talk to often, even a year and a half out from leaving the fandom, which is easily the most positive outcome for me. i could write a million words on how grateful i am for those relationships. it’s kind of sweet to think about how these random blogs i befriended during a crazy minecrafter hyfx are now people i’ve hung out with in real life, or who send me instagram reels, or who i watch timothee chalamet movies with. mcytblr also had some of the most talented artists and writers i’ve ever met! i also think the culture of liveblogging was a LOT of fun, especially during like big lore streams or mcc. an all time favorite memory was liveblogging tommy’s love or host because i saw tommy fans, george fans, and variety fans on my dash all begging for it to end lmao.

Q: Conversely, what are some negative ones?

A: a lot of people were like… really really not nice. and i’ll be honest, most of the not nice people were on dtblr. it’s kind of insane thinking back on the stuff that was said to and about me and my mutuals. this is another thing i don’t want to get too into because a lot of the stories aren’t mine to share but in addition to run-of-the-mill suicide baiting i got a lot of lesbophobia in my ask box, and my friends got anti-semitic and islamophobic and racist and transphobic hate anons. i’ve been on tumblr for like 10 years and it was my first fandom experience that was that vitriolic. it was also really easy to get swept up in that kind of toxic culture -- i’m certain i said some things i wouldn’t be proud of now, especially in defense of dream or whatever.

after october 2022 when dtblr self-rebranded as “dtblr 2.0,” there was a lot of gossip and hate posted about those of us who had left. i don’t like admitting this but it really fucked me up for a while! and ruined a lot of my ability to look back on the fandom fondly! it sucks knowing that people who have never once spoken to you have decided to hate you.

anyways, i’ve done a lot of self-reflection on my own relationship with fandoms and online discourse and public figures and i think i’m better for it, so i guess i hope the people who harrassed us have done that too.

Q: Were there any major fandom/creator events that you remember?

A: broadly speaking, mcc will always have a special place in my heart because it was such a community-wide event. like yes it was about the creators but there was so much activity in the fandom surrounding it (posts, art, analysis, etc etc) that it felt really major for us too.

i don’t remember details about this but i know there were mcytblr elections at some point in like 2021 maybe? i just remember i endorsed the 404blr ticket. maybe you’ve already archived posts about this. i don’t think it really went anywhere, but the campaigns were fun! and it was the first “community” event in the mcytblr fandom that i remember being around for.

ALSO i’m a little nervous to talk about this one in case it’s still controversial on dtblr. but ages ago i had a friend who put a bunch of mutuals in one of those silly hunger games simulators and it became this whole thing where people accused them of only including the “dtblr 1%”. which was like, categorically untrue, but it spawned such inane discourse that it’s ingrained in my mind forever.

Q: Is there anything else you'd like to share or have archived?

A: i think you got an anon asking for 404blr perspectives in the wake of caiti’s statements, which is like… what do i even say except that george is a sexual predator lmfao. because he is! obviously i left the fandom when a lot of people did, after dream’s grooming allegations, because i think he’s also acted inappropriately with underage fans (to put it mildly). the sheer number of survivors publicizing their experiences with abuse and assault in the mcyt space proves how prevalent an issue it is, and how harmful it was to have george and dream (and wilbur, and punz, and so on) in such positions of power there. it’s nauseating to think how much they, and men like them, were able to get away with. i regret how many red flags i overlooked, even back then before the worst of it was known.

i’d like it archived that spider enclosure was technically in the washington post. they ran an article about r/place back in april 2022 and the screenshot they chose for the header included the spot where we wrote “spien” even though it’s so horribly pixelated that it’s illegible.

uhh i think that’s it. sorry if this was more focused on dtblr than 404blr, they were pretty inextricable by 2022. but i hope those people who wanted to hear from 404ers got the insight they were looking for? my parting words… subscribe to tubbo.

[just-antithings]

I'm not saying adults insisting they only need to read YA books and watch children's cartoons is leading to this culture wide phobia of sex which in turn is becoming a useful vector for the increasing spread of fascism except that is exactly what I'm saying.

Im not that anon but want to expand on their thought, if they're saying what I think they are.

I thought of this more when seeing an old post of someone saying their English teacher should have let them write a report on Divergent instead making them read 1984. Someone commented supporting the OP, saying that they never read Divergent, but 1984 is problematic. Iirc, the commenter referred to Winston (I think that's the protag in 1984; sorry I haven't reread it in years) as a creep. I can't remember is this specific commenter called Winston a misogynist, but that's a common complaint I hear when people say they don't like 1984.

The screenshot of that post also had other screenshots, including the twt posts of YA authors saying that the classics were problematic. It's a sentiment I keep seeing around book twt before I deactivated my account but still on booktube as well, and it's always booktubers who also read and rant about Colleen Hoover, because they know her name gets clicks. Or booktubers that do those videos titled "I read [old/popular/controversial] series so you don't have to".

Sorry, sliding off topic a bit. Going back to what anon said, YA books tend to be more sanitized. They're supposed to be written for a 15-19 audience, so sex and gore aren't supposed to be explicit. There are YA books with sex scenes. 2 I read recently have sex scenes, but they aren't explicit. One uses mostly poetic language and infers to what's happening, and the other essentially fades to black after they get into bed, as they're touching and then picks up the next morning. (One of these YA books had a big controversy on booktube a few years ago for being problematic, though. Gee, wonder why /s)

But for the most part, often for people who enjoy urban fantasy or romances but not steamy scenes, they may go for YA, since it's usually more "PG". Unfortunately, some people get it in their head that this makes YA inherently "better", that adult books that are being more explicit are only doing it to get more sales, when YA tbh has a tighter hold on it marketing-wise.

Okay, I'm not published (yet), but I've been studying it when I need to take a break from writing to see what course is best for me and what I want to write. YA is becoming oversaturated in the market, so it's not as big a "money making genre" for debut authors as it might have been once (and I'd argue that even in the past when YA was smaller, you still had to be lucky, known, or connected to get that 6-figure check for a debut YA novel). YA is more likely to get scrutinized, considering its supposed to he for a younger audience, so a YA author wanting to push boundaries is going to receive more push-back than an adult lit author.

Now pushback happens in adult lit, too, like Ava Reid saying her editor or publisher (I forget who) told her that Juniper&Thorn might be too dark. (I've read it. Yes, it's dark, but bad reviews I saw for the book blew it way out of proportion. If you (gen) like lyrical/poetic narration and gothic horror, I highly suggest it).

But it feels like there's more of a push to keep YA books "clean". You can find some outliers, but like the YA I mentioned above, those outliers in YA that push boundaries can get wrapped in controversy and called problematic.

And for whatever reason, some people on booktube say this is a good thing and say "think of the children!"

They will say censorship is bad but then advocate for sanitized YA to be read instead of classics, because the classics are "bad" and "teach bad things" and "should be left in the past". They advocate for censorship without realizing they are advocating for censorship. It's exhausting, and as someone who wants to be published and does enjoy a lot of YA, it makes me feel discouraged. I don't think I'm "pushing boundaries" at all in my writing or saying anything new, but I'm very sure it's not sanitized enough for most publishers, especially if I wanted to try for one of the beg houses in the US.

Tl;dr One of the major problems in this anti-intellectualism is capitalism.

.