#this poem gives me psychic damage

[mono-chrome-me]

tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.

[drbtinglecannon]

Why hello there buddy, hope you didn't think you weren't gonna get an ask in return >w> So hey for that fic ask, how about numbers... 1, 11, 29, 39, 50, and 75! And yee same, just however many you feel like answering :D

Haha I actually forgor so this is a lovely surprise! ^^

Hell yeah I will answer all of them! 💪💪 Unless I already did, I think I got a few of these before

1. Do you daydream before you write, or go for it as soon as the idea strikes?

I did answer that here! But basically I daydream a LOT but sometimes that keeps me from finishing the fic because it's like "I already wrote it" in my head, and other times I will just go for it and finish the idea in one sitting but that really only works for one-shots (which is most of what I write anyway). The fic I posted yesterday I just wrote it as the idea came to me

11. Do you write scenes in order, or do you jump around?

I used to force myself to slog through writing everything in order, but it killed so many wip by making me bored of the idea because I wasn't writing the fun bits yet, so now I jump around haha. Which does sometimes create issues when I start bridging the bits together and have to tweak or completely cut stuff, but it overall keeps me writing more and helps my creativity flowing by quickly getting down the parts I want to and building around them

39. What's your most self-indulgent wip?

29. What's something about your writing that you're proud of?

Also answered here! But sure I can give myself another compliment I earned it!

I'm proud of how my writing has improved over the years. Obviously any skill gets better the more you work it (I say as someone who typically gets distressed and will immediately drop something if I'm not instantly perfect at it 👍) but it's been really satisfying seeing my writing get good enough to be in a couple zines and having people enjoy what I've shared :) so thanks everyone who's ever been nice to my writing haha

For something that's almost done, it's a joke about a trope I never thought I'd write that got way too out of hand and sentimental instead of just quick dirty horny lol. Whoops ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

As far as planned out but not close to being done writing wise, it's a long fic for an obscure ot3 that died pre-canon and it's following the development of their relationships before exploding into their individual horrific deaths, and then maybe a sequel that follows a slightly canon divergent yet still canon compliant idea of what sets about the trainwreck leading to their deaths. Including me it'll maybe have 4 fans haha, but that's fine I love the concept and am having fun daydreaming about it. It's extremely self-indulgent to the point it's embarrassing

50. How would you describe your writing style?

1% evil (syntax) 99% hot gas (banter)

Hahah, but yeah I think I really thrive with conversation but I also really really enjoy working sentences until they bleed (aka I gave up) to convey as much info and emotion as I can without being too wordy, because outside of writing stories/fic/poems I'm an rambling mess that says "like" and "fuck" far too much haha! It's my only time to be concise ✌️

75. Is there a particular fic that readers gravitated towards that you didn't expect?

My first ever fic both that I wrote and posted. It blew up a lot more than I ever expected or hoped, and it still gets kudos regularly and comments occasionally, and is still by far my most popular fic haha

Unfortunately that causes me the tiniest 🤏 amount of psychic damage each time because while I'm thrilled people still enjoy it and that it's been read by so many people, it does not hold up to my current writing skills by any means. Oh boy it is rough around the edges haha

[sourkitsch]

Sending my gf Underbelly by Nicole Homer as if that poem didn’t give me psychic damage for like a year. Also I’m normal.

[huntunderironskies]

moooooooom @gristlegrinder is trying to get me to explain the edgy battle idol boy microgenre to unsuspecting innocent people againnnnn

Anyway. Ask meme time! I always feel bad tagging people in these because I can never tell if someone finds it annoying or if someone would do them but doesn't get tagged most of the time and therefore feels left out, so if you're reading this consider it an invitation to participate. That is an @ everyone I guess. All that said, I'm going to pick randomly from both old friends (@braintapes @elderdragonapologist @darkprincecait) and some people who I see interacting with my posts a lot but who I've never really held conversations with (@brieflyinfatuated @parasitic--saint @6-piece-chicken-mcnobody) just to kick things off. Again, if I didn't tag you but this looks like fun, you can do it! But I like giving people notifications and I also like multiples of three so that's why I only actively tagged six people by name.

I went way off the rails talking about stuff so I made it harder than it should be to find the categories. For the record the categories we are talking about are: Last Song Listened To, Currently Watching, Currently Reading, and Current Obsessions should you decide to do this meme. Without further ado....

Last Song Listened To: If we're talking "listened to because I was actively seeking out music," it was apparently No Matter What by The Cat's Whiskers according to Spotify. If we're talking incidental background music, it's whatever that one BGM is in the Grammaphone Cafe in Cassette Beasts.

Currently Watching: Kingohger. Kind of. I'm way behind at the moment, I am really sorry, Cait. If drama tracks/radioplays count I've been picking through Magatsunote and just wrapped up the first season. It's slow going because I have to translate it from Japanese which I absolutely do not speak fluently, I'm trying to finish it before Executioner starts putting out theirs in earnest. I am probably not going to make it in time.

Currently Reading: I finished An Unauthorised Fan Treatise in like. A single sitting which is rare for me, my attention span and memory retention has shrunken to nothing over the past few weeks for various reasons. A mystery novella was apparently just what the doctor ordered. What I'm actively reading now is The Backwater Sermons by Jay Hulme since poems are so much easier for me to get through when I'm having those kinds of moments.

Currently Obssessed With:

So. I'll start with the answer you're fishing for...

...but it's under a cut because I got very wordy given that I'm kind of intense about the things I like.

I don't know how to describe this other than the fact that hit music project Hypnosis Mic, in which the matriarchal government that takes over Japan after World War III legally mandates psychic damage-based bloodsports as a form of conflict resolution, absolutely printed money.

To the best of my reckoning the reason why is that a lot of the women (and a not insubstantial amount of transmascs from what I've observed, me included) who'd grown up on male idol projects like Uta no Prince-Sama and fluffy otomuke were older now and were no longer able to relate to lighthearted high school antics. But being stuck in a miserable adulthood with a world that feels like it's getting worse and worse around you and you have to struggle against the crushing pressure of a system you never asked to be born into, sometimes pitting you against people and things you love? That's relatable. Meanwhile, you still get the fun of identifying and fighting for a musical group? And there are anime boys who are in their mid-twenties to early thirties and are therefore age-appropriate for you to be thirsting after? And and the music is really good? Total goldmine.

And so a bunch of other corporations with an interest in the joseimuke market decided to make their own music projects that (mostly) take place in the dystopian near future and feature a lot of suffering and bloodshed and homoeroticism and some kind of plot they can shoehorn idol units into.

I have nicknamed this microgenre the Edgy Idol Boy Battle Anime and appointed myself the foremost expert on this esteemed field. @missmadril (...who I guess I have now tagged so she can do this tag game also now, have at it bestie) will probably back me up on having claim to it since I have no standards and will immediately watch/listen to anything that falls under that genre, also I have very little competition for that role because I'm pretty sure the EN-side fandom for Magatsunote and Executioner is literally just me.

I got onboard very early with Hypnosis Mic pre-first season and immediately knew the second that I saw Jakurai that he was going to rewrite my brain chemistry. He's a white haired (....well, grey, close enough) angel-themed character who has committed terrible crimes in the past and is wracked with guilt over it, doing everything he can to make up for his misdeeds to the point of needless self-sacrifice. What was I supposed to do, not fall madly in love with him? Now, I am still very occupied with hpmi but we're currently between plot arcs waiting for the third round of...whatever is going on after all those plot twists so in lieu of content I have been fixated on different franchises. More specifically, certain characters. I accidentally wrote essays about them. Sorry.

The shitty pictures are because, once again, the EN-side fanbase of these is me and me alone. As such there are like, zero resources out there including art assets. I tried very hard to make these screenshots of the official webpages. Please clap.

Momiji Beniyashiki

Remember how I knew sight unseen that Jakurai was going to rewrite my brain chemistry? If you forgot, just scroll up, it's like just two paragraphs above. Then you will remember.

Alright, well, here's the second character who's going to do that. Executioner only has its story/character teasers and a single out right now but so did hpmi when I first got into it and I could just instinctively feel it in my otomuke/joseimuke old guard bones. It feels like a bad arthritis day, for the record.

Now, those of you who have been in my presence for some time may be thinking "Hey, he's not Raz's type at all, since when have they been into pink haired alt fashion anime boys?" Well, you have judged me wrongly. I am somewhat less superficial than that. You see, it's all in the personality and backstory.

Momiji is an orphan who was adopted by a phantom thief who stole from the rich to give to the poor, and after finding out his dad's secret decided he was going to become a phantom thief too, owing to his own strong sense of justice. He's a pacifist with a reckless streak who sells his soul to a demon to save the world and that's why he's part of a demon-possessed visual-kei tokusatsu unit, and the other members are his adoptive brothers who are also phantom thieves. I would say this makes sense in context, but it doesn't.

I am entranced by his tboy swag and dedication to doing the right thing in defiance of conventional moral codes. For approximately one second in the latest single teaser (the full single is happening on Friday) (sorry in advance to anyone who talks to me on Friday), he was animated parkouring about the screen and I was so excited I began to vibrate quickly enough that I started clipping through the furniture like a character in a badly programmed video game. If the Asta drama track doesn't get dropped soon I will simply chew my own arm off from frustrated anticipation. I barely speak any Japanese and I've been trying to translate every single line of dialogue and lyrics he's had in my spare time just so I can keep thinking about him during this content gap. I've bookmarked a kanji dictionary because I'm functionally illiterate and I can get through maybe one sentence a day. Why must it not be Friday. I need it to be Friday.

At any rate, stan Asta because one of your alternatives is stanning for the unit that consists mostly of cops, and I think it is a moral good to join the war on crime on the side of the criminals. There's like, a bunch of medical professionals or whatever as the other alternative I guess. But come on. Heroic phantom thief siblings. There's a clear correct choice here.

Now that we have established the objectively best character in any of these edgy idol projects ever, let's move onto the next person who has infested my brain like a culture of cordyceps.

Masamune

"Oh, there's the white-haired anime boy!" you may be saying. To which I respond, "Shut up, a gentleman is allowed to indulge in certain vices."

Now, I know he did conduct a semi-judicial summary execution of a man who had resorted to crime in order to feed his family due in part to the inherently horrific socially stratified dystopia everyone lives in, and that was within the first five minutes of his appearance. So, not a great first impression. Like, the guy was threatening to shoot a hostage, but it was kind of overkill to take his head off without a second of hesitation. At least his corpse got used for like, fertilizer or Soylent Green or something, it's not totally clear other than ominous implications as to what happens to dead people in this setting. Truly a win for all the utilitarians out there!

He has a sense of justice in the worst possible way where he's completely unforgiving, uncompromising, fanatically dedicated to the group that he thinks is helping save humanity, and is incapable of seeing nuance. However, when compared to all of the unrepentant war criminals and the habitual arson-murderer and the omnicidal cult leader and the guy heavily implied to be conducting immoral medical trials on his patients, he starts looking like the least bad option. He is in the unique position of being capable of feeling remorse and he was brainwashed (as in, the cyberpunk corporation running everything rewired his neurons and memories in addition to the mundane definition of the word) so that kind of accounts for some of the "being a terrible person" thing.

He, uh, gets better about the whole fanatical devotion issue? Character growth. Like I said, least awful person in Magatsunote is a low bar to clear but he did it. Good job buddy, I am feeling an emotion roughly adjacent to pride for you.

I very, very rarely get the "I want to treat this character as my personal chew toy" response that other people seem to have. Then l I started watching Magatsunote and suddenly my list of characters I would put into a blender if given half the chance has increased tenfold. You can set a clock by the fact that whenever you think someone is redeemable, they will immediately do something that lets you down a scene after at the latest, but they're at least doing it in an interesting way. I have the most affection for Masamune in the sense I would like to gently pick him up, pat him on the head, and then fling him off a cliff instead of immediately succumbing to my own homicidal impulses. I probably don't need to though because every single person in the series is trying to kill each other, up to and including inter-unit violence and backstabbing. Why get involved when other people are going to do my work for me?

Don't take this as a knock against the series, it has some of the best writing chops out of what's otherwise a guilty pleasure genre for me, but it is very hard to recommend to people due to the absolutely bizarre premise even by the microgenre's standards (I honestly don't know how to start explaining it) and all of the characters being kind of. Like that. You need a specific mindset, part of which is an extremely high tolerance for weird anime bullshit and thinking horrible people ruining each others' lives is good wholesome fun, to genuinely enjoy it.

Wait, I'm supposed to be trying to convince people to listen to music. Uh. Stan ARK Kansakyoku, the least of many evils. Also Libra is a good song so, you know, there's that. That's the best pitch I can give his unit.

On a more normal person note, I've been having a lot of fun with Octopath Traveler 2 and I refuse to say which character has been occupying most of my brainspace because some of you will never let me live it down even though I think it is very cruel of the writers to genetically engineer a man designed to appeal to me and me alone, specifically, and I have already said way too much about my taste in men within just this post alone. Don't worry, though! I'm bi! And my taste in women is even worse. It starts with Rodya from Limbus Company and then it's all downhill from there. Listen, she was at least a tiny bit justified in that murder, don't judge me.

Actually, now that I'm thinking on it, Temenos needs to grow his hair out a few inches longer to be truly perfect for my awful tastes. So maybe this isn't a conspiracy against me. Nevertheless, further research into this concerning trend of white-haired anime boys seemingly tailored to my very specific desires is needed.

The last real obsession I have as of late is monster collecting games. I've mostly been doing a SwSh speedrun (to get Rapid Strikes Urshifu, Regileki and Spectrier) (yes, this is for competitive reasons) (at literally every turn where I had a choice I made the wrong meta one my first go around) and playing through Cassette Beasts as a more casual option. Cassette Beasts is super fun! I think it's really more of a Persona-alike than a monster catching game despite how it's been advertised but it 100% nails the late eighties/early nineties nostalgia in the best possible way. I'm so happy I got it on sale but TBH I'd say it would have still been worth it at full price with the amount of fun I've had playing it. It's also really well-designed from a mechanical standpoint IMO and I like its unique take on how type matchups should work, the fact that it uses status effects instead of just a damage multiplier gives so much more tactical weight to combat.

[dragonmuse]

8, 18 for the writer ask?

8. Have any comments/tags/responses on a fic of yours ever made you laugh, cry or both?

OMG so many times. The thing that made me cry the most though was listening to AsIsHerRight read Charlie's story. That was high levels of psychic damage.

But I have also had some really personal comments left that touched me deeply or came at just the right moment. It's a beautiful thing and I treasure it each time.

18. Which is more difficult, the title or the summary?

Summaries for me! I find picking titles not easy, but more enjoyable. I like the process of figuring out what makes the most sense, what informs the rest of the story, goggling lyrics and poems or coming up with my own one liner.

Summaries....ugh those are an advertisment, an enticement and how much should it give away. how much is a secret? I dunno! I hates it.

[madmonkeydisorder]

Oh! twisted muse amuse me use me & abuse

I use your awesome highness twisted plot playing out on my mind my muse be plus on my lifetime cruise

rock the boat I float on drunken ocean calming waves you drive me nutz I dance in trance king fu master disaster Bruce Lee enter the dragon on dance floor once more

I see your beautyfix fixing that default in da game your holy face hidden among other dancing monks who populate the state my holy statement read magic tarot in satellites bios settings on my personalized iOS spreading love you’re my psychic chick waiting on skyline with northern lights on the corner to score illegal lovers over underground caves secret drug dens we starry eyes into black sky over the treasure island in old stoned pirate town I found on my way out off beaten tracks off baseline cartographics linear action film projection on walls in platonic caves in the shades my holy sinner poems decipher pharaoh piramide orgonite crystalline linking park life in blurry Blur pop out on timeline my profane past Polish land sacred kinglish roots inking my first personifications king role model cyberpunk illegal rave breaking all the rules I give you my Poematrix inspired religious passion blue & old soul ignited spark Holy Ghost and fire Pyrex symbol burn out my sad Slavic soul worshipping goddess

spiritual communion I serve my purpose as salt of the land secret king sent on exile lost battle in hell I have endless blessings sent by thunder god

Your red thread I found the end here underground zero point nine gram life on mars I’m Asking Ziggy Stardust I must last here on last legs exploited cyberpunk excessive excitemental chaos experimental Poematrix lost between translations holy typewriter activated in gold therapy narrator human AI tool to transmute holy message in golden age off computers actuall mute me when no future for me in contradictory anthem God save the king smoke pot in da palace bathroom to decorate orders in past present continue on timeline polish white Eagle sent night watch to protect the land I explore in time travels close inspections what the fuck happen to the world?

My headspace capacity storage in damages circulation cctv footages download media bullshit tv remote control I sold simplification sci fy upgrade on amplitudes mathematic sequences numerologos source coded feed my holy quest hear me folks freedom rocks the boat we rescue the sinking ghost ship shipping good and evil seeds to grow green crops on fields of gold needs the most to change the law allow to grow strains engeenered tools operating mind puzzles to click the clock over the coocos nest I had turbulent flight over insane lane wanderer who read copycat how to cope in line mental health act sucks it’s fact

[poetryasreligion]

HEARTBREAK

The first time I reached for stories as conscious scripture was after the end of my first relationship, freshman year of college. The rupture was so intense and all-consuming that I left school for six months. During this period I scrambled for every possible spiritual antidote to the ache that would not leave my chest: I tried meditating and attending Catholic mass, saw a questionable psychic twice, started manifesting on full and new moons, spent $50 on a moss agate crystal necklace. (I also developed an eating disorder that left me hospitalized a year later, but that's a whole other chapter.)

The only lasting salvation for me was stories—songs, poems, movies, long form literature, internet miscellany. Scroll down and you'll find a list of the most important ones.

While I read them, I gave myself permission to live in the words completely. To rest in the soft crook of someone else's life experience that could parallel my own at any serendipitous moment. I'd collect these storytellers' sage reflections like a frenzied squirrel gathers and hoards acorns, repeating quotes like “time heals all wounds” (someone forever ago) and “how empty of me to be so full of you” (Jody Yeary) and "sometimes you get so close to someone you end up on the other side of them" (Richard Siken) until their words turned into my mantras, sacred texts. Something to latch onto while my world eroded.

I once heard that to love is to be changed. Through heartbreak, I want to give us permission to hold onto all of those changes, really feel the weight and texture and temperature of them in our hands. It's painful and it's proof that something real and worthwhile occurred. I give us permission to lean into the ache of another person's absence and fill it with our own words—write a letter we'll never send (at least not now), talk to our friends or the mirror or the sky, document it all for ourselves or maybe someone else who will need a warm jumble of words to wrap themselves up in one day. I give us permission to hold on and accept that some kinds of love we never quite "get over" (and so what if it makes us soft? Isn’t the softness what makes us human? For the record: it’s been 3 years and I still wake up with things to tell you.)

On Sand (pg. 15) by Caroline Cappelletti (poem // time and loss)

The Fist by Derek Walcott (poem // letting go)

The Long and Short of It (hybrid poem/essay // rumination, to be changed)

Excerpt: I’ve been rereading your story. I think it’s about me in a way that might not be flattering, but that’s okay. We dream and dream of being seen as we really are and then finally someone looks at us and sees us truly and we fail to measure up. Anyway: story received, story included. You looked at me long enough to see something mysterioso under all the gruff and bluster. Thanks. Sometimes you get so close to someone you end up on the other side of them.

The Weight of It All (podcast episode // immediate aftermath of a breakup, moments of great comedic relief too)

Someone Who Will Love You in All Your Damaged Glory by Raphael Bob-Waksburg (short story collection // love in all its forms)

The Unsent Project (website // browse unsent messages and submit your own -- beautiful and cathartic)

Good Riddance by Gracie Abrams (album // woodsy breakup rumination from all angles)

History of A Feeling by Madi Diaz (album // parting in its entirety)

Crushing by Julia Jacklin (album // a cpmplete relationship arc)

Playlist by me about being broken up with (compiled over 3yrs!)

How'd you get away? Cause oh, good heavens, we abided by the night But there are darker things than the absence of light And they still creak through our halls

I would build a city out of you and me There would be crime, but still a local grocery If you'd stay

Maggie Rogers, "Blood Ballet" (on playlist)

Playlist by me about being the one to call it off

Playlist by me about reaching for closure and forgiveness

(Bonus: Here and here are poems I've written about my own breakup experiences.)

[ivi-prism]

I’m stealing Shade’s “Ranking the Hermits based on how much I want to fight them”

Have my list and thoughts under the cut :3

Tfc: -100/ 10. Why would anyone want to fight minecraft grandpa is beyond me. Like... maybe if you are in your hero arc and play spar with him because he is your mentor I can understand. Otherwise? No harm shall be bestowed on Minecraft grandpa

Xb: -50/10. Why would anyone want to fight Xb??? look at him! Hear him laugh!

Jevin 0/10. Not because I would lose but because he is a slime. Like he is a non-euclidian liquid so I’ll probably break my hand in the first punch and then get stuck and slime texture might be uncomfy so no worth it.

Etho 1/10. Etho is so cryptid I don’t think fighting him would be fair. Man probably would drop and anvil on my head and thats it. Or he somehow inflicts long lasting psychic damage on me with a pun. He is a pretty cool guy but the potential damage is not worth it

Joe 1/10. No???? Why hurt southern dad?? He makes poems and he is awesome!

Tango 1/10. Mad Evil genius Mr. Tek? Yeah I don’t think is a good plan. He probably has all the place trap already or he has more than enough rockets to out fly me and escape

Stress 2/10. She is so sweet and positive and nice and she has the wits to trap me and obliterate me, better not mess with her

Iskall: 3/10. Other of the Hermits known for pvp but I wouldn’t want to fight him because his laugh is so contagious and it brings me so much serotonin I would feel guilty . Also he a hitman, probably would lose in like 10 seconds

Keralis 3/10. Man would probably bonk me with a diamond block and there goes my teeth. That or he would use those eyes of his for psychological warfare. If I knew it wasn’t going to be an under water fight and that he isn’t wearing god armour I would be willing to give it a shot

Wels 4/10. Roasted in just two minutes but it would be hella cool. If not Wels still has armour and i doubt I have the strength to swing a sword effectively that and punches not available would probably make it a very short fight

Scar 4/10. He is so wholesome and positive I would feel bad. But what really stops me from fighting him is those vex powers of his. Man made a crystal that send Cub back in time, doubt is a good idea messing with him if he can do that and launch a rocket launcher by accident in self defense

Cleo 5/10. Cleo panics easily so in pvp I think I have a chance but she would probably end me with sarcasm before I can even think on a plan

Beef 5/10 if he is in his llama dad persona I would be done for. Just drop an anvil on my head and thats my end

Hypno 5/10. He is so cool I would like to foght him but also not because he is cool

Cub 6/10. Man has too much power. He would kill me in pvp or with redstone traps or with dad jokes. Still I would try it just to see if I can

Doc 6/10. Man fought a god and only lost an arm. It would be hella cool! I would get decimated in seconds but it would have been the most badass moment in my life

False 7/10. Queen of Hearts, Heads and Body Parts would inmediatly kill me with her martial arts but it would be a honor

Xisuma 7/10. His body armour is bad for attack but if I win, video game logic says I’m the new admin of Hermitcraft so is wort a shot. Even if I lose I could say I did it for the lols

Mumbo 8/10 not because I actually want to snap the lanky spoon. He simply looks like an easy target as long as I don’t give him enough time to make redstone traps

Zedaph 8/10 not because Zed is punchable. I just want the blueprints to his redstone contraptions and he ignored my zoucher so I had to take drastic measures

Rendog |8|/10. Ren is so positive it would probably derail into a practice fight and I would probably end up learning something new. That or the man that has a thing for chains and is horny in main will definitely go full Wrestler outfit for the match and I would probably nope out of there due to second hand embarrassment

Grian 9/10. Gremlin man is so punchable and he will definitely trick me with a fall trap or just go blood thirsty and go Lord Dreamslayer and decimate me in pvp. Either way it would be cool

Bdubs 10/10 I will definitely die stabbed 28 times but boy oh boy do I want to challenge such feral energy. Also knowing Bdubs it would probably be funny

Impulse 10/10. This man has looked god in the eye and defeated them just so he can do ‘a little bit of work off-camera’. i intend to try and bonk him in the head so he takes a nap! Will I be successful? Most likely not. But I’m willing to try

[hermitcraftheadcanons]

Hi ⭐ again! Joe is A College of Eloquence Bard, with a bad habit of lacing spells into his rambling. He usually catches himself before anything bad happens to his friends. Until 4d6 psychic damaged happened to Grian, which was also how Grian learned that he WASNT the only magic user on the server.

This took me a while to get to, but I love this so much!

Until the "incident" happened, Cleo was the only one to know of Joe's abilities. She knows how the magic works because she may or may not be a warlock, so she can "gently" remind Joe to tone it down when he starts getting too carried away (usually by smacking him to break concentration for spells that need it).

Also, if Joe really is a bard, the poems at the end of his episodes give us all a point of inspiration ☺️

[laissezferre]

2020 creator wrap: favorite works

i was tagged by @caravaggiosbrushes and @fighting-naturalist (thank you, both! you’re amazing!)

rules: it’s time to love yourselves! choose your 5 (or so) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works.

1. i mean, hands down, my fave for the year is my what-if-fitzjames-was-in-the-antarctic-expedition fic "at furthest south". i poured a lot of effort into this and i'm still proud of it!!

2. "a mid-polar night's dream" idk why, it's just so cute! maybe bc it's recent, maybe bc i'm still in a shakespeare phase, but i find myself rereading it often.

3. "leave no floe unturned" looking back, i see a lot of mistakes and room for improvement, but this stays with me bc hello, steampunk au! also it has the first action scene i ever wrote and it turned out so well!!

4. "there are many ways to say i love you" gifset series (1, 2), for the sheer psychic damage it dealt me while making it.

5. "they are hostile nations" gifset, for the same reason. seriously, this poem suits fitzier so much how is that possible?? ms. atwood???

i won’t tag anyone, but if you consider yourself a creator, please give it a go!

[theblob1958]

your post with the dream poem reminded me of the mash eternal sunshine au which gave me psychic damage all over again

that is what mia dykemulcahy said in their tags and im just ??? i dont know what that is. i havent even seen that movie either so it’s wild that my brain thought of something that reminded people of it. can someone give me a link to it or something??

[solacefruit]

Hi there! First of all, you are a great source of inspiration to me, and I wanted to thank you for sharing your stories and insight on writing in general! I got a question and I hope you dont mind. What do you think makes a story sad or emotional, to the point where a reader may cry? I'm currently writing a story and I want to make sure to get emotions out of my readers but I'm struggling to figure out how to do that. Tips on how to set a sad and emotional tone would be appreciated. Thank you!!

(This has been in my inbox for about a century, I’m so sorry I’m only now getting around to answering it).

Hello! Thank you so much for saying so, I’m glad my work and chatter is both fun and useful to you. This is kind of a difficult question to answer, for the same reason this one is: a lot of writing is intuitive for me and so it can be a struggle sometimes to articulate the process in a helpful way. I’ll do my best, though!

I think it’s pretty safe for me to say that hitting emotional pressure points for people is a strength of my writing, usually. I don’t know if I can teach exactly how to do that, but I’m happy to give some insights and tips I’ve picked up along the way as I’ve figured things out for myself. 

Tip 1. Diversify the feelings.  There are lots of emotions and they travel in packs. Emotions are complex and layered and that’s good. Embrace complexity in your characters, because that’s more real than having just one feeling at any time. A character being “sad” or “angry” becomes a one-note tune really fast, because it’s very easy to accidentally hit your reader over the head with “sad, sad, sad, sad” or “angry, angry, angry.” What should be a moving scene can become bland if you sink too deep into just one feeling. A lot of what people describe as “angst” falls into this trap, but any emotion can become boring when it’s the only one present. 

By comparison, a character being “sad” and “angry” is far more interesting, because these feelings are in conversation with each other. It’s a more textured emotional space. Think about all of the ways a character is feeling and consider how these feelings would move against each other: what feelings are stronger than others, what feelings is the character more susceptible to believing as truth, what feelings conflict with each other and how does the character feel about that? 

It’s very possible to love someone very much and be furious with them for something they did and be hurt and sad for yourself and still feel pity the person who hurt you, and that’s human. I’ve always found scenes that try to talk about that huge complicatedness to be the most interesting and moving to both read and write. I also find sad and painful moments to hit better when there’s the counterpoint moments of sweetness and joy alongside them. Grief makes love more powerful; love makes grief hurt more. 

This might be a contentious suggestion but, in my opinion, no emotions are interesting by default. What makes them interesting is the relationship they have with each other and how the character acts and relates to the feelings they experience.

Tip 2. Set the tone for yourself first.  A lot of writing is based in empathy--i.e., being able to at least imagine what an experience is like, and then transcribing that in a skillful way for someone else, so that they can imagine it too. Because of that, it often helps if you’ve experienced some of what you’re writing about: that’s where the advice “write what you know” comes from. However, it’s not necessary in most cases and good writers are people who are talented at extrapolating what something might feel like and then describing that experience in a truly convincing way. That said, it can definitely help being in the right mood and mindset for the kind of scene you’re trying to write, so it’s worth figuring out how to set the scene for yourself before you begin. 

For me, I usually use music. I’ll pick a song, maybe two, that I’ll listen to more or less on repeat while writing a particular scene, because it’s like a tuning fork for me: it keeps me on key. However, it doesn’t have to be music! You might have a particular poem or passage from a book that really makes your heart feel like it’s going to burst, and that’s such a useful thing to tap into when you’re trying to pass that feeling on to your readers. Find what works for you and don’t be afraid to lean on it when you’re working on your scenes. 

Tip 3. The “light touch” then “piano” approach.  This is a theory I’ve had in my mind for a long time and it’s a big part of my writing practice, but I have no idea how well it’s going to translate outside of my own head, so I’m sorry in advance. 

I think belabouring a feeling can kill a scene, basically. If you go in too hard or you try to squeeze too much out of a reader, you become a parody of yourself. A reader can build up a tolerance to the barrage or become bored (as I do with a lot of “grimdark” media), and that’s really what you want to avoid. My advice for doing so is using a “light touch” most of the time--i.e., lightly tap your reader with a moment or feeling and then move on, try to be breezy with the fleeting feelings of your characters, and resist trying to make them have a big feeling at every moment. 

There’s a reason for this approach. It’s because you are about to drop a piano. In this context, I consider “a piano” (or a sledgehammer, whatever you prefer) to be a really potent moment, an intense feeling, a line of dialogue that cuts super raw, anything that really packs a punch and is intend to hit as hard as possible. I know it sounds goofy, but for a long time, that’s how I’ve envisioned those kinds of moments and honestly it fits. 

In some martial arts (weird swerve, I know), the first few hits aren’t intended to hurt: they’re intended to misdirect attention, or off-balance the target, or distract, or prime the spot for a bigger hit. I think the same theory can be applied to writing, because good writing a precision sport, not a brute-force one. You’re not trying to clock the reader over the head repeatedly with a blunt instrument of a feeling, because, as I mentioned earlier, that tends to be less effective the longer you do it. 

Instead, you want to prime your reader to take the most psychic damage possible when you finally find the right moment to drop the piano. Because of that, writing a great emotional scene is primarily about managing tension and lining up your shot. Unfortunately, I suspect a lot of this skill is something that you learn to do intuitively the more you do it, but you can still intentionally think about your writing in this way and consider how you can make your most meaningful moments really count. 

For instance, think about the core feelings you’re writing about and consider how you might prime those feelings throughout the piece by light references, fleeting moments, pieces of the puzzle that will take on new significance in hindsight when you drop the piano. Figure out where you’re going to put the lulls into your work and figure out where you’re going to build tension--and then figure out how you’re going to manage that tension after you build it. Will you pop it with a really big moment, or will you let it lull down again, or will you leave it unresolved? 

I don’t know how much help this will be in a practical sense, but I truly feel that ultimately what makes an emotional scene effective is landing that one powerful, resonant moment. That’s not to say there’s only one moment like that or that there can’t beautiful and moving lines that have less significance, but if you’re looking to really make that crescendo wave of feeling crash in a reader, you need to prime them for it, build up tension in some way, and then release with something that makes the heart ache. I personally don’t know any other way to do it. I hope this helps! 

[sparring-spirals]

ep 98 belated lb, for the sake of not flooding dashes betw this and hopefully catching up on posts after i finish. Don’t be fooled, I will probably still make individual posts for the parts of the ep I still want to yell about. this goes up until the battle, for the sake of length.

- making note of the cad/nott convo about justice and vengeance. fascinating. fascinating.

- THE HAT. all the hat convos. absolutely hilarious. “Someone just up and snatched it in the middle of the party.”

- Marion: “I can get you a new one”. Fjord, with the most pained expression known to man: “s...ure “

- Jester: “Let what you want be known to the world.” Fjord, confused and emotionally turbulent after the back and forth: “Fuckin pick one. which one is it.”

- everyone other than jester is fucking awful at messages, apparently. And lbr jester is her own brand of chaotic with messages. We give them shit for never giving heads up but tbh sometimes its a miracle the M9 communicates info at all. :D

- Case and point, Jester: “he was just going, caleb kissed me caleb kissed me”. The M9, completely unphased by jester-interpretation of messages and/or shadowgast shippers: “...yeah that checks out.”

- fjord caleb interaction re: the argument at the start. damn. what a fascinating callback.

- these dumbasses. encounter a magical storage artifact and their first question is “can WE go in it???” i love them.

- yasha having a self care day!!! :’) good. she deserves it. <3

- “i have no idea whats in it but i’ll sell it to you for 200 gold” is this??? a gacha machine?

- oh man yeza is trying so hard to support her and veth is trying so hard to look at everything pragmatically while doing her duty to her husband. This is simultaneously already resolved and also painfully not. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

-”You are like the greatest husband ever, can I just say.” :’) <3 <3 <3 

- also pshhh what do you mean luc should learn things other than how to use a crossbow. nonsense.

- “Please don’t get in too much danger.”

“I can’t promise that but I can promise my friends will do their best to protect me.” AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH.

“I want my wife. I don’t want a poem.” CHRIST MATT NO PULLING PUNCHES HUH.

- ... beau giving off mild camp counselor vibes. this is the best sign of growth: she no longer effortlessly exudes the delinquent vibes she used to. 

- ngl im surprised that immediately after exploding a bird with wind beau didn’t just gloat at professor thaddeus, wherever he is.

- idk if the gift is related to the whole “got beau high by accident” thing but its a very sweet gift nonetheless.

- Fashion Show Beau :D please tell me there’s art of this. i love the m9 for shit like this. they all got on board (haha) so fast. Shouting suggestions, compliments. Caleb casts dancing lights. these 

- a 26 on a natural 1. what. what.

- Arts and craft on a boat. :D

- I am reminded that i missed so much of the last pirate arc. is “fighting a random storm guy” when the stormlord sent down angels to kick yashas ass?

- Ongoing course, “Getting Ass Kicked By Lightning Beasts”, 3 credit hours, participation required. 

- BEAUYASHSTER CRAFT NIGHT. and Jester opening up about her feelings! aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah. *makes more notes* 

- (tbh this conversation makes me feel a lot better about the Traveller. :D)

- I’m so glad that they’re all having this conversation, oh my god. Its very good and very open and it makes me very happy. ot3. sorry who said that. 

- i looked away for thirty seconds and it turns from craft night into clay-tasting, wh-

- yasha someone just chucked you into the water until you learned huh.

- also: major green team (i have to rename them maybe) vibes with: “no i won’t do what you ask. but. i will help.”

- oh fuck im gonna have to rewatch this fjord caleb conversation. its so good.

- “I don’t know if I’m more comfortable or if I just care less.” AAAAAAAAAAAAH FJORD. 

- “This is more life than I ever thought I would see.” brjeaus out here bein like “damn weird how life is going okay” aaaaaaaah.

- I CANNOT FUCKING BELIEVE THAT THEY WOULD LET THIS CONVERSATION HAPPEN AND THEN *redacted redacted redacted* >:((((

- caleb having all these emotions giving me all these emotions talking about how he killed a family and now has this one.

- CALEB AND FJORD SHARING FAMILY FEELINGS? IM? WOW YALL WHAT. “You’re a good person.” “no U” (this whole convo in a nutshell)

- fuck tbh this deserves its own post. 

“If your eyes are on them, our eyes are on you.” GODDAMN. 

- “STORMS A BREWIN-” “why does your voice change-” I adore these two ribbing each other and beau as an overenthusiastic pirate. captain and his first mate <3

--- I took a day long break to handle some shit. Alright. Fine. Lets do this. Lets do the battle. ---

- oh just kidding its not the battle its yasha Goin Thru Some Dream Shit. 

-there is Something Incredibly Poignant about yasha, falling through the air, reaching a hand out at her god, asking for help-ohfuckshegothitbylightning.

- i dont like stormlord taking after ukatoa with the ominous 1 word statements. that is NOT a good role model, stormlord. you dont want to stab yasha in the chest do you. .... DO YOU.

- SCREAMS TRIUMPHANTLY FOREVER ABOUT YASHA OPENING HER WINGS AND FLYING OUT OF THE CHASM GOD HOW MUCH SHIT HAPPENED THIS EPISODE AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

- wow no one is getting rest 2nite.

- i am confused if this is happening happening or a dream and also wow he got stabbed real early in

- okay but also i love the cast for how they always collectively scream whenever a battle map comes out. also WOW WHAT A BADASS SHIP/MAP.

- CAN YOU IMAGINE JUST WAKING UP TO BEING FUCKING STABBED AND THEN CHOMPED. GOD. POOR FJORD. MY BOY.

- the psychic damage just sprinkled in there because he is having a Bad Time.

- do you think that initially the crew was like “huh guess our captain accidentally sleep-teleported off the ship, damn- OH FUCK ENEMIES”

- okay yeah i’m gonna make a separate post for the battle just because this is getting unreasonably long

- c h r i s t this battle.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #257

I hope y’all are behaving and staying inside. This’ll blow over, folks.

Have you ever met a guy for coffee? No. How often do you get called on your home phone? We don't have a landline. Do you feed your leftovers to your dogs? We don't have a dog anymore. When we had them, we very rarely did. Mom did so more than me, and I wouldn't give them anything if they were begging. Except chicken nuggets with Teddy. There was no denying him chicken nuggets. Do you like salt on your popcorn? Yes. What tricks does your pet do? Well one is a snake and my cat doesn't know any because since when do cats obey you lmao. Do you believe in psychics? No. When you hear the name “Ginger” what do you think of? Jason's old fatass dog. What is the worst damage that your car has seen? N/A Who is your least favourite character on your favourite television show? In Meerkat Manor, fuck that, I loved them all, lmao. Well, I remember I was bitter towards Rita/Amira for killing Rocket Dog's pups, but even then I knew that was meerkat nature to ensure the survival of their own offspring. That '70s Show, definitely no one. I adore all the characters. For Fullmetal Alchemist, honestly, there are SO many that I don't remember probably even half of them. BUT, from what I do remember, Nina's dad whose name evades me. You watch it and you know why alkdsjf;kaldjw. Have you gotten sick this year? No. When was the last time you got a new ringtone? Eons ago. Where do you put your keys when you get home? They're always in my purse. What’s your phone background picture? Lock screen is a cute as fuck picture of Mark, home screen is two meerkats. If you could move to any country, what would it be? Realistically, Canada. Have you ever seen a snake in the wild? Plenty of times. Do you have any posters, paintings or other artwork on your walls? A LOT. My walls are cramped; it makes it feel homey to me. Would you ever take a trip to space if given the chance? Nah, too long of a journey. How do you cope with anxiety? Watch YouTube more attentively, listen to music, nap, take one of my anxiety meds. Are you expecting any phone calls or emails? No. Who makes you laugh the most? In my "real life," my dad. Out of anyone that includes those I don't actually know, probably Shane Dawson. He's a Mood, constantly. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you? Oh, plenty. I have like the most common white girl middle name out there. What did you have done the last time you saw a dentist? I had a cavity filled. What does a successful relationship look like to you? Both ends are happy, communication is ideal and easy for the pair, both feel loved and accepted fully, and each has healthy freedom. What do you like to put on your baked potato? The ordinary butter, cheese, and bacon bits. What field of science interests you the most? Genetics. What’s the closest shop or restaurant to your house? A Zaxby's and McDonald's are tied, being right across the street from each other. What was the most memorable birthday you’ve had? My 16th is the one I remember best, but not in a good way. What is the best house you’ve ever lived in? Our last house, aesthetically. Right in the woods and relatively pretty, yet simple. Do you look in the mirror before you leave the house? Yeah. Have you ever seen someone quit their job in a dramatic way? No. Do you know why your parents named you what they did? No. I think Mom just liked the name, though. What do you like to dip your fries in? Ketchup, mostly. Is your house clean or messy right now? It's actually really clean right now. We've had a lot of help around the house recently thanks to family and friends with Mom's cancer, and then I've been much neater and attentive to cleanliness than usual because 1.) it's my responsibility to ensure it is for Mom's health and 2.) I dropped out of school so literally have zero excuses to not be doing at least one productive thing. What was the last email you received? That wasn't trash, it was from my old major's dean in school. She was trying to comfort me and give me options on what to do versus leave, but yeah. I'll 100% give it to the school that they deeply and sincerely care for their students, I just needed to go. Do you know someone who speaks without a filter? lmao me. Well, depends, I guess, actually. I know when to keep my mouth shut in some situations. What’s your favourite kind of museum? Science museums. Especially those with d i n o z. Do you believe in alternate universes? I'm open to it, especially with the mandela effect theories, but I don't think so. Whose house did you last visit? My older sister's. What games do you play on your smart phone? Pokemon GO (if I'm in an area w/ Stops to get balls) and Dragons of Atlantis. What kinds of decorations do you put up at Halloween? We don't really decorate anymore for Halloween, or holidays in general. How many tabs do you have open right now? Two. What’s something you’ve been meaning to do but keep putting off? Try more sites to hopefully get a poem I wrote published, but that crippling fear of rejection tho. :^) What’s the first thing you check on your phone at the start of the day? The time. Have you ever flown a kite? Yeah, I loved that as a kid. I’m guessing you’ve probably been asked this before, but which do you prefer - Coca Cola, or Pepsi? Coke. Pepsi is gross. Has your phone ever gone off in the middle of a class at school? No. Did you go to your school dances? Did you dance with anyone? Just two proms. We didn't dance tho because the music was shit. What’s your relationship with the last person you talked to on the phone? What was your conversation about? Like, talk-talked, no texting? Uhhh who was that. OH YEAH, my sister. My mom didn't answer her phone so she just called me to make sure she was okay. The last time you washed your hair, did you use conditioner?
 No, I never do. It just adds oil to your hair, and mine is naturally oily enough. Do you have an item of clothing that reminds you of someone? Tell me about it, and the person it reminds you of. I have a lot, none positive. If the last girl you texted told you that she was pregnant, how would you respond? Ask her who the fuck I need to kill. How would you react if your mother told you that she was pregnant again? Well considering 1.) she's past menopause and 2.) she has serious ovarian and Fallopian cancer, I'd say that's pretty impossible. Who do you have the most text messages from? Sara. The last time you skipped school, what was the reason?
 Uhhh if you mean "skip" as in I had seriously no realistic reason not to go, I think I was just really tired. I tried not to skip unless I was having serious mental health issues. When did you last see or speak to someone you dislike? Why do you dislike this person? I actually don't know who that would be. When you listen to music, do you generally sing along, or just listen? I rarely sing. I just listen. Do you have any of your exes as friends on Facebook? Yes. Does more than one person like you? *shrugs* Has your partner ever accused you of cheating, when you actually didn’t? No. Who was your first love? Do you ever miss that person? Jason. Of course I do sometimes. Other times I know it's probably for the better we have nothing to do with each other anymore. Do you like your middle name?
 I mean it's pretty, but boy do I wish it was more original. If your hair is long, would you ever think about having it cut short? Or, if it’s short, would you like to grow it long? I doubt it will ever be long again. Would you consider your parents to be strict? Dad never was at all; Mom sorta was when I was little. Do you have a mirror in your room? On the back of my door. Have you ever worked in food service? No, thank God. Do you often stay in your pajamas all day? I almost always do, unless I have to go out somewhere. I pretty much never leave my house ever, forget just quarantine, so like... why make more laundry. What are three YouTube videos you would like to film soon? N/A Do you ever listen to country music? No. What is your most severe allergy? Pollen. What’s the largest library fine you’ve ever had? Oh wow, no clue. I haven't been the library in millennia. Have you ever lost a library card? *shrugs* Name three literary characters you feel resemble you the most. UH yikes. This requires too much thought for me rn. Name three cartoon characters that resemble you, and say why. Ummmm I still don't know. Do you have a good doctor? I haven't seen her enough times yet to honestly say. Mom knows and likes her well, though. She's fine so far. Do you wear a watch every day? If so, what color is your watch? No, I never do. Does your phone alarm ever scare you? No, it's very peaceful. Which department store do you shop at the most? Wal-Mart. How old were you when you got your driver’s license? I'm 24 and am yet to have it. Do you have regrets? A good handful or two. Do you ever curl your hair? It's too short to do so. Do you know anyone who has coronavirus? No, and I pray I never do for my mom's sake. Out of all the big cities you’ve visited, which has/have been your favorite? Chicago is the only big city I've ever been it. Was pretty damn dope, though. Do you like dreamcatchers? I mean, they're cool. I don't believe in them being magical, though. Have you ever made a dreamcatcher, and if not, would you like to learn? No and no. Who was your high school’s biggest bully? I don't remember. What color was your graduation cap and gown? Red. Did you keep your graduation cap? I think I did. Did you decorate your graduation cap? Nope. What is your favorite part of nature? The animals within it. Do you use Photoshop? Yes. Favorite photo editing app on your phone? I don't have an editing app. Did you love or hate college? Well, considering I dropped out three times, guess. Favorite class in high school? Art. Favorite class in college? Idk. Probably Writing. Class you hated the most in high school? Math. Class you hated the most in college? Painting brought me the most stress. Do you know how to write in calligraphy? Not technically. Have you ever had a pen pal? No. Do you prefer brownies or cookies? Brownies. Man I could go for one. Favorite Girl Scout cookie? Those Reeses-ish ones. Did you ever go camping as a kid? No. Do you have hormone issues? No. Have you ever gotten a misdiagnosis because your parent(s) lied about you? Er, no? A shitty doctor has misdiagnosed me, though. Which Barbie doll was your favorite? I didn't even know there were "types"... Do you wake up to an alarm? No. When did you go to bed yesterday? Like, 8-something... I rarely make it past 9:30 nowadays. Do you live in a city, town, or in the country? The country. What color is your toothbrush? White. When was the last time you had a nightmare? Yesterday while I was napping. Woke up shrieking and scared Mom out of her skin. Tainted my mood almost the rest of the day. If you had a terminal illness, would you want to know? No shit I would. What was the last thing someone called you other than your real name? I don't know. If you could meet anyone who lived before your time, who would it be? I have no clue. Is there a candle in the room you are in? No. Are you currently taking any prescribed medication? More than I like. Do you have bad anxiety? If so, do you take any kind of medications for it? Yes and yes. Who was the last person you felt you were wasting your time on? I don't know. One thing you’ve experienced that you thought you never would have? A suicide attempt. What was the last thing someone said to you that kept repeating over & over in your head? Ugh. If a random person were to look through the photos on your phone, is there anything you’d be embarrassed about? No. If you could, would you work from home? Do you think that would make you more or less productive? No no no no. I need a reason to leave the house. I'm way more productive away from home anyway. What were you like in middle school? "The weird kid" describes it pretty well. If you could give one charity a million dollars, what charity would you donate money to? YIKES!!!! Now that's a question. Probably something for suicide prevention/awareness. What is something you’re surprised hasn’t been invented yet? The cure for cancer. It's incredible, just how many "possible" cures have been identified in nature, yet you like... hear NOTHING about it afterwards??? My conspiratory and "the medical industry just cares more about money" ass wonders about that a lot. Most disturbing movie you have ever seen? Paranormal Entity or The Rite. Has a life goal or dream ever come true for you yet? If yes, what is it? If no, do you think you’ll achieve it? No. And probably not. What one thing has always bothered you, but seems to bother no one else? Hm. I'm sure there's something. Do you still own a VCR and VHS tapes? No, pretty sure they've all been sold. Did you ever build furniture forts as a child? Yep. What kind of dog is your favorite? Pretty sure I'm biased towards beagles. Are the majority of your friends male or female? Female, I think? Have you ever considered dropping acid? Noooo sir. Would you consider yourself to be mature? Mostly. Describe your music style: I like unique alternative stuff. Catchy, heavy riffs do me in easily, too. I like well thought out, dark, and impactful lyrics. Are you close to any of your aunts/uncles? Not very. Have you ever had a seizure? No. When was the last time you were in a hospital? For myself, 2017. I think. Do you go on vacations a lot? I never do. Are you self-conscious around other people? Very. At your workplace, are you required to wear a uniform? N/A Have you ever witnessed a physical fight in real life? Huh, good question actually. What was your GPA in high school? 4.2/3 or something. Do you use a lot of hair products? I don't use any. I mean, besides shampoo. What is the most amount of money you’ve spent at one time? My own money, I think $300 on a tattoo. What is the best pizza place out there? Domino's. I'm such a basic bitch. Do you know how to play any odd instruments most people can’t play? Nope. When was the last time you used a disposable camera? I think the zoo visit in 5th grade. What is your favorite book series, if you have one? Can't say I really have one. It definitely used to be Warriors by Erin Hunter, but I haven't read any in maaaaaany years. Do you have any celebrity autographs? Nah. What is your favorite color of clothing to wear? Just black. Admit it – you want a Snuggie. What design/color? I got a black one one Christmas, lol. They're honestly not all that great. Do you prefer movies at home or movies at the theater? THE THEATER. I actually enjoy watching movies in the theater. It's just the vibe, I guess, and the size of the screen so you take in everything. How many songs does your iTunes have? Just over 1k. Its memory is maxed out, oof, so if I want a new song, I have to thin the library out. Do you take a shower in the morning or the night before? I've been taking showers more often in the morning, lately. It's a nice, refreshing start to the day. I'm just too tired and unmotivated to at night. Who’s your youngest teacher? N/A When’s the last time you had a rock, paper, scissors match? Wow, no clue. What’s your favorite anime? Fullmetal Alchemist. Did you cry when Ash let his Butterfree go with the other Butterfrees? Oh I probably did, but THEN AGAIN, the female was FUCKIN PINK so I'm sure I was also happy for Butterfree lmao. Even as a kiddo, I knew pink was The Shit. Skinny, flared, ripped, or faded jeans? Skinny, ripped ones. What are you excited for? Just honestly, nothing in the even remotely near future. Nothing in my life is exciting rn. Are you part of the Farmville cult? Never played. Have you ever stood on a frozen solid body of water? YIKES besides like, small puddles, definitely not. I'd be scared to. Which person from way back when would you love to hang out with? Jenna, an old best friend, came to mind first here. It'd be great to catch up with her. She called me in the hospital after my suicide attempt despite not talking in absolutely forever, and I'm never going to forget that. Does your family use a real pine tree or a plastic one for Christmas? Plastic. Literally the only positive of the real ones is the smell. Otherwise, it's a mess that dies too quickly. Do you have any foreign exchange students at your school? N/A What’s your second language? I'm not fluent in it, definitely not anymore, but the language I took for four semesters was German. Is it uncomfortable for you to take showers in glass stalls w/out curtains? OH MY GOD I would positively hate that. Even IF I had a decent body. Did you understand Shakespeare? I was alright. What was the last shot you got? It was a numbing agent into my gums. They had to do it like... seven times. Apparently, I'm just like. Really hard to numb. Ever gotten cavities? Yeah. Do you use hair ties as bracelets? I don't even wear hair ties. What was the last school project you did that you couldn’t wait to turn in? Uhhh... I don't remember. Have you ever graded papers? I actually have; I was helping a teacher on work day. I used to go back to my elementary school a lot to visit my favorite teachers. What was your favorite year of school up to this point? Maybe like, junior year of high school? Or senior. I don't remember which one of those I enjoyed more. I just remember I loved my art class, I had great grades, my relationship was strong, yada yada. What’s the latest you’ve ever woken up? Like 5-6 PM. Had a busy night and that evening was a complete panic attack because my system was so thrown off. One thing I DON'T miss from high school: how bad my anxiety was. Can you recite the alphabet backwards? NOOOO I cannot. Like, at all. Are you a sucker for foreign accents? Some, yes. Do you do yoga? Not anymore.

[timeisacephalopod]

Where Tony climbs up a tree breaks off a branch and asks if you can milk it. When Sam finds out his house actually is haunted and immediately moves out. . When dragon Tony wakes up and notices hes sleeping on werewolf bucky and pops him in the nose

Honestly, the ‘can you milk it’ line ended up being much more popular than I anticipated lol. That seems to be the fic I get messages the most for on Tumblr too, actually. A lot of ace people have sent off appreciative messages about relating to Bucky being asexual. Also, I vaguely know which one the Sam thing is referencing, but can’t for the life of me remember the actual fic. But lets be real, Sam is one of 3 characters in the MCU with common sense, he’d move immediately. And I’m pretty sure the Dragon!Tony thing is from that Peter Q/Bucky/Tony AU, which is one of my favs. I do love some good urban fantasy.

Anyway, I attached the ‘can you milk it’ scene below the cut for anyone who doesn’t know what its referencing (its from a winteriron fic called Better):

Tony doesn’t understand Bucky and Peter’s absolute fascination with conspiracy theories that defy logic and also basic science but they love it. Everyone else loves it too because they’re now running a successful YouTube channel where they basically talk about fake science for an hour every week. Now he guesses he gets to be here talking about whatever fucking theory it is this week as the skeptical one.

“So,” Bucky says very seriously. “We’re going to talk about Lithuanian poems.”

Peter frowns, “what?”

“What kind of ridiculous shit could people have come up with about Lithuanian poems? What, that they’re psychic and predicted the future or something?” Tony asks, rolling his eyes.

And the Bucky, because he’s a giant prick, looks him dead in the eye and says, “yeah.” Tony reaches across the table they’re sitting at and pushes the glass beside Bucky off the table, not blinking when it smashes against the ground. Bucky looks down at it and back up at Tony, “that was your glass,” he points out.

“I don’t care,” Tony says and Bucky sighs, getting up to get a new glass. As soon as he sits down Tony pushes that one off the table too.

“Why are you like this?” Bucky asks softly.

“Lithuanian poems are psychic?” Peter asks.

“No,” Tony says immediately.

“Technically the theory is that they predicted future events but yeah basically they’re psychic,” Bucky tells him.

“No,” Tony repeats. “You will absolutely never convince me and I honestly think this is the most ridiculous theory you’ve proposed.”

Peter grins, “more ridiculous than the moon being fake?” he asks and Tony sighs.

“In a more mundane, not-an-immediate-write-off way, yes.”

You immediately wrote them both off,” Bucky points out.

Tony sighs, “you told me the fucking moon was fake and that Lithuanian poets apparently predicted the future Bucky, there’s nothing else to do but immediately write them off.” What else is he supposed to do, humor this bad science? Absolutely not. Actually no, its not bad science, its not even science. Its not even theory or literally anything else noteworthy. Its trash is what this is.

“That’s definitely not the most ridiculous theory I’ve ever read real or fake,” Bucky tells him and Tony raises an eyebrow, sitting back in his seat and crossing his arms.

“Do your worst Barnes, give me something more ridiculous.”

“Trees are mammals,” Bucky says and the noise that comes out of his mouth is inhuman, possibly even lizard-like because what the flying ass.

“No,” he says, standing up. “No, no, no, no. You get up I can prove this wrong right now,” he says, storming out of the room.

*

Sam is wheezing out laughter because although he normally wouldn’t admit it Bucky is fucking hilarious. For the most part his hatred of Bucky is a show even if its rooted in maybe just a little jealousy over his friendship with Steve but at the moment he can’t be bothered to care about appearances. Not with what he just watched. “Steve,” he wheezes out, “come watch this.”

Steve manages to crawl his ass out of bed, sick again but this time with the flu, and perches himself in Sam’s lap. He’s light as a feather, which scares Sam sometimes, but at the moment he’ll set aside Steve’s obvious need for sustenance. He can worry about that after Steve watches this five-minute clip. He starts it up at the part where Bucky tells Tony that trees are mammals only to watch Tony lose his damn mind as he storms out of the room.

The camera cuts to a shaky angle of Tony climbing a tree yelling about morons, negative IQ points, and the world ending as he manages to shimmy himself out across the limb closest to the ground. “Dad get down from there, you’re going to hurt yourself!” Peter says from behind the camera but Tony is clearly too pissed off to care. That’s when he stands, testing his balance for a moment while Bucky joins Peter in yelling at him out of worry and Tony jumps, snapping the branch and both him and the branch hit the ground.

It has to hurt but Tony doesn’t show it when he gets back up and Sam starts wheezing, knowing what’s coming. “He doesn’t even take fall damage,” he squeezes out.

Tony grabs Bucky by the collar of his shirt, dragging him closer to the tree branch, “can you milk it!” he shrieks in this hilariously high pitched tone that has Bucky dying of laughter immediately and Steve too. Lithuanian poems are totally lost in this particular episode but its worth it to watch Tony lose his shit at least until Steve starts wheezing himself into an asthma attack.

[eyesaremosaics]

Hey sry if its a stupid question but how does it feel to be moon pisces/venus in leo?what kind of people are u attracted to?also do u mind me asking whats ur mars sign?thank u.

Pisces is the heaviest of all the signs, it carries with it the weight of all the others. In my subjective experience, it means my emotions are very deep and complex. I have strong psychic abilities, my intuition is almost always 100% accurate, the only time it varies, is in relation to my opinion of myself. Pisces tend to be martyrs, they feel victimized and badly used. Truthfully, I have been, but I also realize I co created that with my beliefs. Often I see things with rose tinted glasses, i romanticize everything, especially the past. I see everything in terms of poetry and art, the Leo only enhances this. When something is wrong with someone close to me, I can feel it. I have prophetic dreams, that will come true within a few days. My love is unconditional, even people that have hurt me deeply, still hold a very special place in my heart. I understand everyone on a psychological level, and can find common ground to empathize. Even in extreme circumstances where the other party does not deserve it.

I often feel like… i’m living in a fantasy. I have a very active imagination, and often prefer  it to reality. Sometimes, i fear read TOO deeply into things, making connections when there are none, left barren as a tree in the winter. Easily disillusioned. When someone or something is revealed for what it truly is, I am traumatized. Deeply damaged by the disillusionment. Dreamy, romantic by nature, but also dark and very morbid. As ethereal and ghostly as people touched by pisces are, they have a very dark shadow aspect. People often make the mistake of assuming Pisces are innocent, incapable of harm. A few pisces to mention: Richard Ramirez, John Wayne Gacy, and Aileen Wuornosjust to name a few. This may be surprising, but Pisces rank highest on the scale of zodiac signs in serial killers. They are considered to be the most dreamy and artistic, but also capable of complete separation from reality.

I think because they are often victimized, their imagination causes their personality to split. Pisces has a really hard time with emotional disappointment. Much more than other signs, even Cancer. Hence why Pisces often struggle with drug addiction. The Pisces moon enhances my creativity, intuition and psychic ability, but it also makes me dark, self destructive, drug addicted. I have struggled with escapism since childhood, because I often feel unequipped to deal with life. Often I have been quoted saying: “I’m too sensitive for this world”.

I cry when I see lost animal poster for godsakes: “I hope they find that poor dog!” *sniffsniffsobsob*. I feel other peoples feelings as viscerally in my body as if they were my own, and often become ill from too much exposure to other people and their problems. Hence why I like to be alone 50% of the time. Movies frequently make me cry, songs make me cry, violins make me cry…poems, a beautiful sunset, kindness from a stranger, all make me cry. I cry when happy, I cry when sad, I cry in secret most of the time because I am ashamed of how much I cry. One minute I dance around singing to myself like a disney princess brushing my hair gently, with the sunlight glowing through my gold curtains…next minute I am literal death. Can scarcely breathe, I feel like I am dissolving into the nothingness. Its exhausting to be, let alone be around. Yet people have told me my presence is very healing to others. Healing comes naturally, which brings a lot of hangers on. I have deep emotions that confuse me, on one hand I am accepting, on the other clinging desperately to illusion. a split dichotomy.

Venus in leo, makes me very regal, romantic, and PRIDEFUL. My pride has kept me from ever speaking to people again. I have very strong will power when it comes to a perceived slight. I have a strong sense of loyalty and morality, and if people do not meet my standards, I will never view them the same again. Creative, self starting, with grand romantic gestures. I once made a huge book of every drawing, poem, journal entry, photo etc etc I had written about an ex of 13 years. It was the size of a Harry Potter book. Spent hours pouring over all my material, put hours of my time into this thing. I walked to an exes house in the rain with a knife and told him to stab me in the heart at 14 years old. VERY dramatic and intense in love. I love rarely, and when I do i am like a woman possessed. My Venus in leo manifests in the 8th house which is scorpio. So I love–To DEATH. All the heavy sexual intensity, black sinister passion and depth of scorpio, with the drama, the flair and fiery passion of leo. I’m both equally romantic and darkly sexual. Very masochistic, the pisces makes it so, the leo gives me warmth and sincerity, and the scorpio is like a knife twisting in my gut. I always seem to be suffering in love. It’s never pleasant. Rarely do I give up, only if absolutely defeated, in which case I limp off to lick my wounds and feel very bitter for ages.

My mars, is in Aries, which means I am a very aggressive personality. Though I can be soft and sweet with the libra/pisces combo, often I am fiery, combative, arguing is an aphrodisiac for me. If there is no challenge, I bore easily. Can be very bossy, opinionated, self righteous, impulsive. Since mars represents getting what you want, I just go out and take it. I don’t ask, or wait for it to come to me. Often I pursue men, I don’t wait for them to pursue me. When men do pursue me, i find it a bore. I’m attracted to girly looking men, with ultra masculine personalities. I tend to like strong silent types, still waters that run deep. Hence why I usually date Scorpio’s, occasionally Aries. It’s very attractive when a man has an air of mystery about him, and sadly I fall for the bad boy stereotype because of my dad. I don’t beat around the bush, and will tell people the truth often when they are not ready or don’t want to hear it. I hate lies and dishonesty, and will spit venom when necessary to get the truth. I get impatient with wishy washy or indecisive people, because I know what I want, and get frustrated with people who don’t. Sometimes a bit of a bully, though I don’t mean to be. This again also enhances the sexuality. Very aggressive, has to be rough or I will bolt. Many boyfriends were too vanilla for me, and i walked away without a second thought. I rarely am attracted to people, but when I do–I will make it known. People always know where they stand with me.

Thanks for asking :)