#this party is bonkers wtf is happening

[warlordfelwinter]

celeste: [having a prolonged mental breakdown that's been going for like a week and suddenly panicking about having let strangers into his house]

asmodeus: [throws a rock at his window]

celeste: i'm fine now :)

[revvethasmythh]

it's been weeks and i'm still so compelled by the background storyline of hawke going to weisshaupt after here lies the abyss. like. it makes no damn sense. maybe if hawke has a living sibling who is a grey warden, you can twist the logic of it, but i did not have that and also hawke said she wanted to make sure corypheus died and neither staying in the fade NOR going to weisshaupt really accomplishes this goal. like there is NO reason for hawke to be up at weisshaupt, this is not in her lane, this is not her business, her skin is NOT clear, her crops are NOT watered. the wardens are not the responsibility of your Just Some Guy from Kirkwall who has potentially zero connections to the wardens at all except for that one time they super causally tried to use her as a blood sacrifice (maybe she and the first warden can laugh about it some day, but somehow i doubt it!).

BUT. but. the mental imagine of hawke going there and then her sibling (if alive) and her love interest ALSO going there, just to meet up with her, makes it so bonkers funny i don't even care if it doesn't make sense. wtf do you mean hawke family reunion relationship drama in the austere home of the wardens where they all show up and then the entire leadership of the wardens suddenly implodes as civil war breaks out and then their asses get STUCK there. wtf do you mean hawke inadvertently sticks her ass in the middle of yet another civil war while simultaneously having to patch things up with her LI and deal with a sibling dynamic at the same time. hawke can't catch a fucking break istg. it's just her, her sibling, and her LI as their own little three person party while some truly WILD shit goes down and the epilogues are all ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ about what happens other than like two lines that put the most insane images into my head. there's a sped-up video of this going down in my mind with the benny hill theme playing in the background. why does varric talk like hawke is still at weisshaupt during trespasser, which takes place two entire years after hawke was meant to go there to give a basic report and then dip. how is this THE most hawke thing to ever happen and we're just. told nothing more about it except that varric got One™️ message from her via an entire smuggling syndicate that essentially says "damn, shits crazy here" and that he assumes hawke will walk away from the building while it's exploding sometime in the near future because apparently the conflict there is not yet resolved. again, this is TWO YEARS LATER. like trespasser is fun and all but truly can we revisit wtf this was all about because WHAT

[bourbon-ontherocks]

helloooooooo and: wth happened w ep7. wtf. agree w the jarring close-ups but it's kinda fun they're trying new things, so that's actually the least of my qualms. 1) ROXANE😰 2) plot? what plot? 3) I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. but the dancing scene felt so out of character I was utterly convinced morgane had dreamt it up. ??!?! no words. it's my least-liked ep across both seasons😂 pls tell me I'm not the only one in shock... (phew, feels good to get that out of my system😅)

(Julia's adventures with the HPI anon)

Oh my gosh, anon, I'm so sorry that you didn't like this episode!!! While I completely feel the point you listed, it didn't stop that episode to be one of my faves, so I just feel like I should explain myself (yeah I just needed an excuse to ramble about that episode you got me)

This got a little long so I put it under a cut for the dash’s sake

Okay so first of all, 100% agreed, the Roxane cliffhanger was wayyyyy over the top and random and very TF1 (that is NOT a compliment 😅), I was shocked too. Considering what happens in the last episode, I understand the need to bring some ~drama~ to the table and to kinda poke Karadec where it hurts, but I don’t think going for a such a cliché and dramatic final scene was necessary. That is not my favourite part, except that I do have a soft spot for characters going through hell together so the fact that Morgane and Karadec are left to deal with the situation together at the very end kind of makes me go 😍😍😍

Not sure what you meant by plot what plot, if you’re referring to the case, I agree it was bonkers and am coming back to it later. If that’s about the character’s personal lives, I guess I agree it was pretty nonsensical but not more than in previous episodes? Idk I feel like Morgane kiiiiinda moved forward in her life by finding a house and slowly winning her son’s affection back? Now the birthday party was totally random (again: these people have zero personal life outside of work lol) but it was kind of fun to see the team in a non-precinct context.

Now the dancing scene. Wow. Where do I start? Okay, so I definitely vibe with your theory that it’s juste a Morgane fever dream. The whole scene feels completely eery (the close-ups et al. do NOT help with that), and I do agree that it’s wildly out of character for Karadec to do this, BUT he literally told Morgane “let’s create your first good memory here together, baby”, I mean he actually said that, after which I rightfully died from a heart explosion, so the bottom line is I DON’T CARE ABOUT THE OOC-NESS BECAUSE THIS IS LITERALLY THE MOST ROMANTIC THING HE’S EVER DONE WITH HER 😱😱😱 😭😭😭🔥🔥🔥💖💖💖

Also the fact that you pointed out that the scene felt out of character sent me down a rabbit hole of questioning re why Karadec would do that (I assume you meant ooc for him, because at this point I believe Morgane would be down for anything lol), and I think that the only possible explanation is that he genuinely bonded with her when she lived at his place (I mean, he did act really nice then, re the pasta scene) which leads him to behave like an actual friend with her now, and seeing how distressed she was about moving in her new house, he wanted to do something nice. Also my theory is that he’s been completely head over heels for her since the bathroom almost-kiss + her being single again, BUT he’s not actually aware of that, so basically him asking her to dance is the only way he’s found to unconsciously channel his attraction to her.

Which ties with the fact that they’re both blatantly aroused after dancing together (Morgane’s breathing sounds like she just orgasmed, and Karadec’s first move is to bootycall his girlfriend???), ahfioahaohzauohzduhaziduhui WTF IS THIS SHOW??????????? 😭❤️😍😂😱🤦🥵🔥🙊💖🤣🤭😩🤯🤩🙈🥳

Actually I have the same love/hate relationship with the dancing scene as I have with the toothbrush scene. It’s just very awkward, and out of nowhere, somehow painful to watch but at the same time swoon-inducing, y’know? It feels OOC but also it’s terribly them because you CANNOT expect these two dummies to do anything normal about their (non)-relationship.

Plus Les démons is one of my favourite songs but we’re not talking about that... And I absolutely agree that Morgane’s reprise of the song alone at the club at the end was heartbreaking (as was, like, idk, ALL THE SAD PUPPY EYES SHE GAVE KARADEC ALL NIGHT WHILE HE WAS OBLIVIOUSLY GROPING HIS GF?????), as well as the handprint being brought back in that moment. The handprint is actually a symbolic thread that I really liked, since Karadec meant it as a happy/fun memory for Morgane but it very quickly becomes something tragic for her because it symbolizes her own heartbreak over him, and something something about torment and delusion and walls having litteral memory... I don’t know I just really really like this. Also do you think it could be a twisted ref to Titanic?? 👀👀

Speaking of that club scene, you know what I really hated about this episode??? The reveal that Karadec has absolutely no notion of musical taste!! I'm sorry but Femme like U is a CURSED song that nobody should be allowed to use, especially for such a cheesy gratuitous karaoke moment (tis a CXG ref btw)!!! You tell me how I'm supposed to write the POV of someone who's got shitty tastes in music 😭😭 For the sake of my sanity I'll pretend it was Roxane's fave and Karadec humored her mmkay? 😢

The Terrific Trio is always here to save the day, Céline’s rant when she couldn’t find where the body had gone absolutely killed me, and I’d buy that Gillles chante Goldman album tbh! There’s absolutely room for a Gilles x Karadec ship, also it’s getting more and more obvious that Gilles has a total crush on Karadec and keeps fangirling over him and their professional partnership so y’know... #makegilleskaradec2k22

The car scene as the beginning was... weird imo, lol, because the close-ups on Karadec’s lips, hands, etc, felt like someone drunk-tried to depict female-gaze while having only theoretically read about it in books? But I liked how the show unsubtetly stressed on Morgane’s obsession with Karadec, haha!

Now for the other parts that I liked about this episode:

The birthday card. The scene where Morgane reacts to everyone’s bday note to Karadec legit had me in tears, this was so funny 🤣🤣 Also can we talk about the fact that Morgane said out loud “Adam I love you”???? CAN WE???? 😱😱😱

The case. Okay, this investigation was complete bananas. How did the husband did not realize his wife never was pregnant? This scenario sounds like a Maupassant 19th century short story, you know one of these where a bougie teengirl gets knocked up and mysteriously disappears in “thermal cure” with her mother, to come back a few months later “oh yeah turns out mom was pregnant, miracle of life, huh?”. I literally don’t understand how this works in the 1990s though??? Did both sisters go to the maternity and the younger one quickly passed off the baby so the other one would claim she’d just given birth??? Did they stay in Mali for 9 months and everybody was cool with them not coming home for the birth? I have so many questions. BUT. Putting the absurdity aside, I really really like the playfulness and aesthetic (the cluedo, the harpsichord music, the dramatic filming, Morgane’s big reveals and the ppl complaining when her phone goes off at the wrong time, CYRIELLE omfg best look I’ve ever seen on this show and that includes Morgane’s outfits) they pulled in that episode. Also the creepy alcoholic twins who betted on whether their cousin killed her mother or not?? Amazing characters 😂😂

The “little seed” joke. I’m sorry but Morgane messing with Karadec and asking him if he knows where babies come from makes me laugh. That and the genetics back-and-forth of recessive genes vs. nulliparous (I’m surprised that one of them didn’t know the term each time, though, I knew both and I haven’t studied biology since high school 👀)

“You’re 10, you can handle a house moving!” 🤣🤣

Anon, I’m so sorry for this incredibly long rant that I took like an hour to write lol, I’ll try to be more concise next time

[mirandalinotto]

First Impressions of The Unusual Suspects

Here there be spoilers

Is it worth watching? Yes.

Is it what was advertised and marketed...? nope nope nope nope.

Hey, if you're just watching it to pass the time, it works. it's mildly entertaining, and has enough twists and turns to keep a person interested. But honestly? If you tried to analyze the plot for consistency and logic... literally none of it would withstand even the most generous scrutiny. None of it makes sense, especially when we consider that NONE OF THESE WOMEN EVEN CARE ABOUT EACH OTHER in more than a superficial, "you're useful to me" way.

Also, The Unusual Suspects was marketed as an authentic Filipino-Australian experience, with Filipino stories and culture at the center. But honestly? As someone who is neither of those things, and therefore has no jurisdiction over it, and is acknowledging I don't have it... I still feel like it completely missed the mark, because I learned absolutely nothing I didn't already know about either culture...?

Let's be honest... the Filipino experience isn't at the center; Sara's IGNORANCE to the Filipino culture, and indifference to her nanny's life, is at the center. Unfortunately, wealthy white women have frequently treated their staff (often comprised of women of color) like this for decades/centuries. You could replace Sara with any white woman around the world, and you could replace Evie with any minority, and it would not fundamentally change the story, which is why it doesn't feel like an authentic Filipino-Australian tale, when it seems very much just a general commentary on the upper class versus the lower class in any society.

And for a show that was marketed as having a #girlsqaud, there was practically no female bonding, until the last few minutes of the final episode, and even then, Sara was still putting her foot in her mouth, and Evie was still giving her *that look*.

... that's not empowering or revolutionary, it's just SAD that it took four full episodes for these women to actually know one another, when most of them had already lived and worked with one another for years.

They don't even introduce the idea of a heist until the end of episode 2, and even then, none of these women even like or trust each other, so why would they work together on a CRIMINAL CONSPIRACY...? the only thing all of them have in common is a desire for money. that's it. that's what drives them to come up with a truly BONKERS heist that ultimately gets botched because Sara (shocker) isn't the best at carrying out a criminal conspiracy, when she's being blackmailed and facing a divorce and just all-around ruin.

Also, "Birdie," Heather Mitchell's character, only becomes a part of the heist while... eavesdropping? I could accept this if she were just a peripheral part of the heist, but she isn't? She's the only one capable of orchestrating it in a way where they'll all get away with it, and she isn't even technically supposed to be there...?! Like at the very least, they could've made her a lawyer who had helped one of these women in the past...?!?! But no? She's just a random and very *convenient* neighbor who has answers to all of the problems?

And here's the thing... if we actually saw meaningful growth and development of the relationships in the show, I might be able to get behind it, but because it's only four episodes, everything is rushed, and practically none of the growth feels "earned."

Why are these women willing to risk life imprisonment for each other? why is the desire for money the only common link they have? Surely, as women, they could find something else to bond over? Especially when all of their husbands are lying pieces of shit...?

And if the whole point was for Sara to become a better person... why are quips STILL being made about how racist and ignorant Sara is during episode 4...? like, by the final episode of a season, I ought to be able to like the main character, and see growth in them... but almost all of that growth happens off-camera...?

And don't get me started on the men!! Let's just... not go there. The rant I have building up inside of me about "Nick" is going to take at least a few days to process, so let's just... not.

(Suffice it to say, when a man has sex with a woman just to orchestrate the exploitation and blackmailing of said woman... I think it ought to be given more air time and a better conclusion than just a random wrestle during a party, and an arrest that is entirely unrelated to the real crime he actually committed...? like wtf?)

Anyway... I've watched plenty of things for Miranda, and left them feeling kind of "meh" about the experience. This one was no exception. But i feel like the difference is that I had high hopes for this, and was just utterly disappointed.

Watch it to kill four hours. Watch it "for fun." But don't go into this thinking any of it will have internal logic. It doesn't.

[woodchoc-magnum]

911:Lone Star 2x08 Hate Watch

Here we go, though I heard mixed reports that this episode was better than the OG's 4x08? So we'll see.

Diaz for strength:

And the hate is under the cut:

Things are almost instantly off to a bad start with TK as the very first person we see

Oh god SERIOUSLY WE'RE DOING THIS SOBER ANNIVERSARY FIRST FUCKING THING?

Like don't even ease us into it

We're just going right into the schmaltz INSTANTLY

"My parents got back together" oh TK you are in for a RUDE SHOCK MY MAN

No masks at this party

No social distancing

Pandemic, what pandemic?

Oh shit SHE'S MOVING OUT ALREADY

"We were right not to tell him" YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO TELL HIM AT SOME POINT YOU ASSHOLES

Just when I think Rob Lowe can't be more of an asshole, there he goes, out-assholing himself

Oh do you guys call cash registers "tills" in America? I thought that was a British/Australian thing

Please let him blow up

Please let him blow up

Oh wait does Carlos have more than 30 seconds in this episode? WHAT'S GOING ON?

Damn he didn't blow up

Uh oh TK's come home to Lisa Edelstein moving out

RELAPSE?

Wait was she just gonna fucking LEAVE? WITHOUT TELLING HIM?

Oh TK you dumb fuck

God he can't act, he is such a bad actor

Everything is in a fucking monotone

It's a complicated question? Bitch you're pregnant with someone else's baby and you're also in love with that someone else

Oh shiiit TK you're so dumb

She came down to Texas, fucked Rob Lowe's brains out, rushed back into everything and now she's pregnant and fucking back off to New York – smooth move

Who is this mysterious Enzo? I would like to meet him

Ronen can't act. I know I keep saying it but he's like a robot.

Wow Carlos has been in SO MANY SCENES WHAT IS HAPPENING

Is his dad a cop? Did I know this?

I can't remember the name of the guy who plays Carlos but here's what I'm going to say – dude is about a million times better at acting than Ronen Rubenstein. There is actual EMOTION IN HIS VOICE AND ON HIS FACE

Is his dad a lawyer? What's the deal here?

I feel like this is a conflict? Should the dad be investigating the son? Oh he's a Texas RANGER

I still feel like it's a conflict, ngl

I'm bored

Dude's dad doesn't believe him and he's gonna be proven wrong isn't he

Wow this dad is almost worse than Owen, he has no faith in Carlos whatsoever

What a dick

Hey maybe you two should've just FUCKING TOLD YOUR SON THAT YOU WEREN'T GETTING BACK TOGETHER AND THAT IT WASN'T OWEN'S BABY, THE DUDE IS IN RECOVERY

And the lack of concern from Rob Lowe about his ONLY SON IS FUCKING STUNNING

Okay so my theory is that Rob Lowe allowed Carlos to have lines in this episode of the show provided that he was the one in the scene with him

Look at Owen actually trying to do the right thing here and not be selfish for once, amazing, we love to see it

What is with everyone in this show having terrible fathers

I'm bored AGAIN

"there should be a heart behind that shield" god give me a fucking break, you're nicer to Carlos than you are to your own son you dick

No masks anywhere at the scene, no masks on anyone at the fire

It's like they remembered about the pandemic for the scene at the bank and then forgot about it again for the rest of the show

Ooh is there going to be an EXPLOSION?

What is with me and things blowing up – look I watch this show with the understanding that bonkers things are going to happen and I'm a simple person who likes when things go boom, what can I say?

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMM

Good explosion

Oh now daddy dearest knows that Carlos wasn't lying and he didn't fuck up

I bet he feels like a right fuckhead

I disagree with the assessment that this was better than 4x08 of the OG, at least the OG has people who can act – at the very fucking least

And no Rob Lowe

Oooh Carlos' dad is as cold as fucking ICE

Yeah Carlos you stand up for yourself, you're getting lines in this episode and I'm so happy for you

TK is such a whiny little bitch

His voice just grates on me, god he fucking sucks so much

OOOOH IT'S A TRAP

THEY'VE BEEN ENSNARED IN A SCHEME

That dude don't look so hot

God damn Nancy with the sick burns (her name is Nancy right?)

Oh TK leaving a CLUE what a smart little cookie, someone's been reading his Nancy Drew books hasn't he? (is that reference too old?)

"In American" BITCH

"we're not surgeons, we're paramedics" – he SAYS EVERYTHING IN A MONOTONE, there is no emotion in his voice AT ALL

Oh no Carlos is waiting for his man

Wait is Carlos going to save the day?!

No I bet Owen does, I will not get my hopes up

They're gonna perform surgery in a restaurant? I mean I suppose Hen and Chim could do it but I don't know about this bunch

Oh shit TK just knocked the FUCK OUT

It's about TIME

You know, if he actually relapsed because of these two assholes, they would totally fucking deserve it

Rob Lowe does not seem worried literally AT ALL

His son is missing and he's just like, okay cool

Oh wait he was playing it cool – okay fine, I retract my previous mean statement

I love that TK is just knocked the fuck out while the women do the work

Can I marry Gina Torres or is she already married or… what's the go there? Would she want an Australian wife with two cats?

These two dumb bank robbers really think this dude is going to live?

DO NOT STRANGLE GINA TORRES YOU MOTHER FUCKER

Oh shit the one nearly dead bank robber killed the other one

Carlos is going to find TK's special little clue and HE DID

What a good boyfriend

Good thing Rob Lowe has Carlos here, we can see who the brains are

Carlos is just out here solving mysteries, maybe HE'S the one who's been reading Nancy Drew (does anyone read Nancy Drew anymore?)

Ooh Carlos with the trusting of the gut YOU GO GIRL, go GET YO MAN

Though real talk you could do better

I mean ngl if this was Eddie storming in to rescue Buck I would be ALL OVER THIS, this shit is MY JAM but it's TK and Carlos so who fucking cares

OH SHIT HERE COMES GINA TORRES HERE WE FUCKING GO

OH YES NANCY

YES THE LADIES ARE SAVING THE FUCKING DAY

WAIT

ROB LOWE FIRED THE SHOT???? WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?

HE IS A FIRE CAPTAIN

WHERE DID HE GET A GUN FROM?

I think Carlos' dad is flirting with Rob Lowe

Look at him standing up for Carlos

Oh and NOW the dad is being nice, okay

How the turn tables

This Strand family drama is the most boring fucking shit ever, I legit don't care

OH GOD

WHY ARE JUDD AND GRACE DRIVING IN THE RAIN

NO

NO

WHEN DID IT START RAINING LIKE THIS?

SHE WANTS BABIES JUDD

THEY'RE GONNA HAVE A BABY

NOOOOOOOOOOO

FOR FUCKING SERIOUS IS THIS SHOW FUCKING SERIOUS DO NOT BREAK MY HEART

Look obviously they’re going to be all right because they already killed Zombie Tim this season, but still. Not Judd and Grace, the two best characters on the show!

Okay, this episode was marginally better than other episodes but it still sucked, so I’m giving it... 4 out of ten. Honestly, it does lose points because Rob Lowe is the one who shot the dude? Like actually wtf?

BUT it must be in Rob Lowe’s contract that nobody gets to do anything cool in this show but him so it does make sense.

Really not gonna miss Lone Star the next few weeks, see you after the hiatus for more hate watching!

And Eddie Diaz to cleanse our hearts and minds:

[steve0discusses]

Yugioh S4 Ep10 pt 1: Yugioh Predicted the California Drought

Ah, my break is officially over, and it’s a new year, and so far, this year kind of sucks so lets get distracted and watch some TV. IF ONLY we could solve the world’s issues with a bunch of lost children from Japan carrying magical paper cards, amiright?

Anyway, Seto reflects on these cards that he came alllll the way to California to learn about, only to learn about them, and then decide “Yeah I didn’t really want to know that, Yugi.”

I just want to remind everyone that last episode I said “and now Kaiba has joined the party” and it lasted like less than one conversation with Yugi before Seto was like “oh hell no” and just walked out in that purple ball gown, trailing behind him like a complete diva.

Yugi needs to curse his friends to like him more often, is what I’m saying.

(read more under the cut)

So, staring at the fallout of their rekindled friendship with Kaiba that lasted less than a minute, Joey makes an observation.

And then Yugi just wonders “the hell is this plot supposed to go if a Kaiba isn’t here to abduct my family/tell me what to do/get abducted themselves?”

So they decide to reach out to the only other person on this show with a degree than Seto Kaiba.

(And TBH, Seto probably just decided to buy a new degree in graphic design from Devry so he wouldn’t have to finish public school and spend another millisecond in the same room as Joey Wheeler.)

And I have to give Yugi credit for finally deciding to visit the only adult he knows in America. Way to finally find an adult, Yugi. Took 4 season’s but you’ve finally done it. Gonna go visit Arthur Hawkins and dance awkwardly around this Rebecca situation that I guess Tea is fine with now. She used to be jealous, but I think Tea genuinely enjoys spending time with Rebecca now. The jealousy kind of disappeared once the plot picked up.

And Kaiba just takes off in the most wasteful plane ever invented, off to destroy precious fossil fuels on some other side of the planet.

Kind of weird that Tea would rather fly in that asshole dragon plane than Duke Devlin’s sweet retro car, but youknow...I’ve mentioned before that Tea is secretly just a Kaiba-lite without the cards. Of course she’d prefer an asshole dragon jet.

And Yugi would be able to fit in the suit-case compartment of the dragon jet. Just put the suitcase on Mokuba’s lap, and then stuff Yugi into that little slot, he’d be fine.

And honestly Kaiba made the correct choice, because what these guys had to go through is absolutely ridiculous. First off, Duke is like “Oh, this is really close to here” (remember they are in the Financial District of SF) and he just turns directly off of 101 and blows through some bird sanctuary somewhere.

Like y’all, everywhere that doesn’t have a house or a cow field on it in the Bay Area is a protected bird sanctuary, weird fact about the Bay Area, and Duke killed so many birds this episode. The South Bay is SO DEVELOPED.

Course, that is again assuming that the art staff knew that they were drawing the Bay Area, which they SUPER DID NOT.

Now this rock structure, I’m sure, is there to mimic the next shot with the giant ass building--it helps make pleasing screen transitions. But...at what cost?

AT WHAT COST?

Just....

Like I am starting to think the landscapers only knew how to draw one type of mountain and that was it. Square mesas only. They were just unprepared for hills. And like...we only have wild grass that is green like this for like...2 months of the year. That’s it. That’s what my Winter looks like, it’s when the grass is alive.

How did this happen?

Anyway, Mai is alive, and really upset about it. Will she at all reflect on her behavior, and realize that if the main mini-bosses are telling you to knock it the hell off, then maybe there is something wrong with you? Like these are two people who I assume harvested a ton of souls off screen like actual serial killers and they’re like “Girl. You’re like being hella mean right now and need to tone it down.”

I mean, if Mai gets better, than that basically gives Joey absolutely nothing to do in this season so, gotta keep Mai completely bonkers. There she goes. On a motorcycle.

And if you thought Yugioh was done throwing recreational and vintage vehicles in your face, well don’t worry, they even got the OG vintage vehicle, check this one out:

A freakin horse.

And I have to tell you...horses are hard to draw and animate and Yugioh doesn’t do a great job and it is wonderful. I love seeing this horse kind of awkwardly stumble around. It’s very good stuff. Like clearly these artists do not love horses as much as they love one of these:

Of course, get allllll the vehicles in this episode, Yugioh, bring back Marik on his yacht, I dare you.

And then...this very bizarre set of things happen in succession. I’ll just show you.

NICE.

WOW.

That entire house just exploded.

Not just a part of it--but the entire freakin house.

They were there for like less than 30 seconds, and just demolished that entire house like it was Independence Day the movie.

And like that whole house situation was pretty bonkers anyway, not sure why they need a planetarium when they research undersea structures, but youknow what? Arthur Hawkins would. 

And don’t you dare do the math and think about how much a house with a planetarium and a horse stable in it would cost in Silicon Valley. It’s way too depressing, trust me.

And yes, that probably exists. Lots of horse people in Los Altos, and it makes me wonder if maybe they based Rebecca’s home on Stanford University? Maybe? I feel like these animators think Stanford is in San Fransisco. That one seems likely to me.

Also, kudos to the horse that it got blasted 50 ft away by an explosion and not only is the horse completely OK, but so is all of her groceries. That is one power horse, right here. I mean the groceries are still covered in so much horse ass smell, but youknow, Rebecca’s 12 so it’s not the horse’s or Rebecca’s fault that she has no idea how groceries work. We should just be glad that she bought vegetables when she went to the store and not just 8 cartons of pop tarts.

So, hours pass, no police show up, and Yugi and co walk into this bleak situation.

Fortunately, the massive explosion did not explode the truck-led RV outside.

A truck that...could’ve been used to go and get the damn groceries, may I add. If Arthur Hawkins used the TRUCK and done his own job without sending his granddaughter into a modern town on a horse, then he would have been at the grocery store and his house would never have exploded. This one is on Arthur, honestly. Then again, he seems like he kinda has the parenting skills of Yugi’s family, who just kinda...delivered him to San Fransisco un-aided and was like “have fun storming the castle”

This ship is kind of hilarious in action, not gonna lie. Yugi’s here with a grandpa who came back from the dead and is like “They don’t really need your grandpa, so he’s probably fine” and it’s like wtf. That’s terrible advice, Yugi.

Anyway, they apparently needed the Oricalchos necklace that Yugi handed off to Arthur back in like the first episode. So Yugi didn’t exactly mean for this to happen, but yet again, because Yugi and Pharaoh can’t be bothered to keep track of their own magical items themselves, someone else goes off with them and gets super screwed. Again. At least Arthur isn’t totally evil (although he still might and go rogue like Marik, and we all know that would be a very funny hairstyle if it happened)

So Rebecca happens to have this necklace just on your person (WTF, ARTHUR THAT’S YOUR GRANDDAUGHTER) and she gives it back to Yugi, where it should have stayed in the first place since he’s haunted by powerful ghost powers and is the only one here that can handle all these haunted Mordor rings. (just remembered he left Bakura’s ring in Japan. I’m sure that’s not going to be a problem later.)

So, that’s all for Part One. As you can see, I’m a little behind schedule, but youknow, I got lazy over the break, and then I drew Joey Wheeler a bunch when I planned to be typing, and it was overall a really great use of my time. No regrets.

And if you just got here this is a link to read the Yugioh recaps from the start. One of these days I’ll put the link into seasons but that does mean I have to retag stuff.

[letterboxd]

Demented Suburbia.

Greener Grass writer-director-stars Jocelyn DeBoer and Dawn Luebbe share their favorite films while pontificating on extreme politeness, John Waters and The Swimmer.

New indie comedy Greener Grass is not the Netflix marijuana documentary Grass is Greener, but you could be forgiven for making that mistake after the directors of the former gave out free marijuana at a recent outdoor screening, according to their friend Jim Cummings (who makes a cameo in the film, and lurks on Letterboxd).

It’s been a case of watch-and-learn for other up-and-coming filmmakers, as Jocelyn DeBoer and Dawn Luebbe have stormed the 2019 festival scene with their utterly weird and wonderfully bonkers debut feature. Nobody is doing red carpet lewks like them, nobody else is handing out free weed (that we know of), and nobody else has made a film quite like theirs. Attracting comparisons to the films of David Lynch, Anna Biller and Tim Burton, but utterly at home in its own creepily perfect world, Greener Grass is the WTF-is-up-with-white-people film America deserves right now.

And it’s the culmination of years of creative growth for DeBoer and Luebbe, friends and Upright Citizens Brigade veterans, whose suburban moms Jill and Lisa first appeared in the Paul Briganti-directed short of the same name (for which they won the 2016 SXSW Special Jury Award for Recognition for Writing). DeBoer and Luebbe stepped into the directing chairs for The Arrival, another short exploring demented suburbia, while developing Greener Grass for television.

When a series failed to eventuate, they spun Jill and Lisa’s world into the feature film, landing on the unforgettable location of Peachtree City, Alabama, a real town built for the golf-cart lifestyle. Greener Grass hit the spot for many Letterboxd members at its Sundance premiere: “Just what I needed after seeing so many dark films!” was Alicia Malone’s reaction. “Unlike anything I've ever seen but … tackles ideas I have never been more familiar with,” wrote Karsten.

The story kicks off when Lisa compliments Jill on her newest baby and Jill, following suburban rules of politeness, hands the baby over to Lisa to raise. This is far from the strangest thing that will happen to a child in Greener Grass.

We needed to know where this wild duo get their filmmaking inspiration from. When we spoke with DeBoer and Luebbe they were in “high heaven”, having just held the LA premiere of Greener Grass.

Lisa, Dennis, their son Bob, their adopted daughter Madison (now Paige), and their newborn soccer ball, in a family portrait from ‘Greener Grass’.

What were some of the real-life ‘greener grass’ moments that inspired your film? Dawn Luebbe: There’s one story which Jocelyn tells about her aunt who was at a dinner party one night. She was in the kitchen talking to the host and complimented them on her apron—“that’s a cute apron!”—and the host took it off and said it “you must have it, take my apron.” At once she was like, “oh no, I just like it, I don’t need it,” and the host insisted and wouldn’t drop it. So that night Jocelyn’s aunt left with that apron. Of course, that’s just a very small example of politeness taken to the extreme. We took that general vibe and added to it and really blew it out.

Jocelyn DeBoer: I feel like we experience this at restaurants too. Dawn and I are from the Midwest, so we have a problem where no-one ever really wants to eat the last bite of something that’s shared. I do remember one experience where I was on a double-date with some acquaintances I didn’t know so well and we were eating sushi. Someone had those crispy rice things that have some spicy tuna on top and when the waiter brought it out, one of them fell to the floor. Our friend just picked it up and said “10 second rule!”. The waiter felt bad and offered to bring new ones and we were saying, “Yes, get the new sushi. Don’t eat that one off the floor!” But the person didn’t want to make the waiter feel bad and ate it right in front of them. I thought, ‘this is a Greener Grass moment for sure!’.

You’ve said elsewhere that you tried to avoid referencing other films in the development of yours, but can you tell us some films that you love, that peddle in the same story area of ‘demented suburbia’? JD: We always admit that we were watching Twin Peaks together at the time we were making our short, so there’s no denying that David Lynch is an inspiration to us. Mulholland Drive, of course. Blue Velvet, too. The two of us just love John Waters, he rocks.

DL: We love how John Waters satirizes suburbia but he also clearly has such love and adoration for it too. It’s our dream to strike the same balance.

JD: Yeah, we’re laughing with the people we grew up with, not just at them.

DL: I would say also Edward Scissorhands was another movie that was a point of reference in terms of the bright pastel color-block world, with this element of darkness filtering in.

JD: We love satires like Brazil, the visual comedy especially. We both loved that surreal world. Luis Buñuel, of course, with The Discreet Charm of the Bourgeoisie, has the sketch-like aspects in a narrative film we wanted to do. We could just go on!

Jill (Jocelyn DeBoer) and Marriott (Janicza Bravoin) in a scene from ‘Greener Grass’.

Greener Grass technically has a lot in common with great horror films—one of our members, Sara, writes: “This reminded me so much of Halloween with the use of voyeurism and the John Carpenter-esque score… Suburban moms are ten times scarier than Michael Myers”. So since it’s Hallowe’en, tell us your favorite, go-to horror films. JD: I don’t know if this counts as a Hallowe’en movie but I love Rosemary’s Baby. That and The Shining come to mind first.

DL: Those two very much for me too. You know, I have to admit that maybe until about five years ago, I thought I was not a fan of horror. I feel a little not in the best position to speak to that. I tried very much to cram in what I can and then I discovered I actually love horror movies.

JD: The funny thing is that no-one loves true crime more than Dawn!

DL: Yes, true crime is my greatest passion.

Which film turned you onto horror, Dawn? DL: I actually think it was Rosemary’s Baby. I saw that and thought ‘this is very scary and I love it’. This is more recent, but Get Out, too. I found the marriage of comedy and horror to just be incredible and the visuals in that movie, to have such a sense of cinematic comedy-horror, just blew my mind.

You gave some of the best lines to the child actors in Greener Grass. What was your approach to working with them to capture the absurd spirit of the film? DL: That’s so nice! We absolutely love Julian Hilliard, who plays Julian, and Asher Miles Fallica, who plays Bob. From the second we saw their audition tape, they so got the tone, the characters, and they just jumped off the screen for us. They’re so mature in a way. They understood the comedy and the tone in a way we did not anticipate.

JD: They took their roles so seriously. One story we love about Julian is how he had to fall in the pool and we shot that very early on. We told him we want him to fall just like a plank and we’re showing him YouTube videos of planking so he was practising it in the hotel pool. We went on the day to shoot that scene, and the take that’s in the movie is our first and only take. He just nailed it perfectly. A couple weeks later, we went to shoot the first scene of the movie, which is when he falls in the soccer field. We go to shoot it and Julian starts to fall in a hard plank, just like he did in the pool but on the grass. We were like, “wait, no no no, you don’t have to fall like that!” and he just looked at us and went, “but that’s how Julian falls!”

What streaming platform is Kids with Knives on? Seriously: we’re fans of films that build a complete world within, including the fake shows and commercials you see playing on television sets. Can you tell us some inside stories of developing those? JD: Those were so much fun for us to work on.

DL: These kids were just so incredibly enthusiastic and Jocelyn had them circle round and asked them what kind of gymnastics can you do, let’s see what you got. And then one after the other they were doing the splits, back-handstands… We thought, ‘this is great—Gymnastics and Knives!’ We should have been filming that.

We’ve really enjoyed showing your trailer to people for that ‘what-the-fuck’ reaction. What’s a bizarre film that you love to recommend to people? (We asked this same question to Daniel Scheinert who directed Swiss Army Man and The Death of Dick Long and he said Greener Grass.) JD: Wait, are you kidding?! That’s so nice, oh my gosh! The first film that came to mind is Dogtooth. I’m always curious to talk to people about that one. Dawn, what about The Swimmer? Have you seen The Swimmer? You have to. It’s the Burt Lancaster vehicle.

DL: It’s about a man who crosses his county by swimming across every swimming pool. I’ll just say: what you think the movie is in the beginning turns out to be very different to what the movie is. The protagonist changes quite a bit.

JD: One of the coolest things about how we’re travelling the world promoting Greener Grass is how we get to talk to people afterwards and they go, “Oh the movie reminds me of this, it reminds me of that.” It was the director of Fantastic Fest who told us we have to watch The Swimmer. We watched it on the plane and there is a scene where a man is kind of obsessed with the filtration system in his pool. Everyone is talking about how great their pools are the whole movie, so yes, this is like our movie, thank you.

DL: There’s also a passionate monologue about a hot-dog wagon that’s the best thing that ever happened in cinema.

JD: It’s fantastic!

What are your go-to comfort movies? How many times do you think you’ve seen them? DL: Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory I’ve probably seen 500 times.

JD: I really love Dumb & Dumber. I’m also a big comfort watcher of the Sex and the City TV show but I don’t recommend the movies!

What’s a film you wish you had made? JD: I want to say Roma, but that movie couldn’t be more different from Greener Grass. I loved it.

DL: For me, I’ll say Waiting for Guffman. It has such a special place in my heart. I just remember when I was probably fifteen or sixteen seeing that movie in Nebraska and laughing so hard my stomach hurt and thinking, ‘wow, movies can be like this?’

What’s a beloved movie you couldn’t get into? JD: Now I just feel bad talking about other films in a bad way. I’m really glad this film exists—but personally I had trouble getting into the Wonder Woman movie. I think there’s a lot of cool things about it. Maybe I’m just over superhero movies.

Dennis and Jill share an extra-marital kiss in ‘Greener Grass’.

You told a journalist at Sundance that you “did have one storyline that you pulled late in the game in fear that it might be taking something too far. We still fight about that decision and Dawn is wrong”. Are you prepared to tell us that twist now?! JD: I don’t know why I said that because we just set ourselves up to be asked that all the time. We are not going to tell you what it is, but we can tell you one storyline that Dawn and I actually loved that we ended up cutting before going into production. In a previous draft of ours, Buck, Kim Ann’s husband, who she divorces and he starts to become a cowboy, shows up at a kid’s birthday party with a new girlfriend and all the women are gossiping about, “Oh no, did you hear Buck has a new girlfriend, her name is Pamela,” and, well, she’s just hair. It turns out when we meet Pamela, she is just a very large, floating blowout. At this time Buck was also trying to sell a jet-ski because Pamela can’t do wind. It was a favorite bit of ours.

We did a few script readings with our comedy writer friends and paid attention to what people laughed at and what people talked about afterwards. No-one ever mentioned Pamela. They didn’t say she was confusing, they didn’t say they liked her nor that they didn’t like her. And we were, like, for just a character who’s all hair to not be spoken about at all, it’s not a good sign and we should lose her. Since then, we had people who read those scripts and [said]: “Why is Pamela not in the movie?!” and we’re now “Well, damn. We don’t know!”

DL: Maybe we’ll make a movie about Pamela one day.

You were working with such a great cast of improvisers. How did you strike a balance between what you had on the page, and what they could bring on set; in what ways did they surprise and delight you? Not only your actors, but for the artists on set such as your costume and production designers. DL: We were just so blessed to work with these incredible improvisers; Mary Holland (Kim Ann), D’Arcy Carden (the school-teacher, Miss Human), Neil Casey (Lisa’s husband, Dennis) and Beck Bennett (Jill’s husband, Nick). It was such a gift. I would say the movie is probably 95% scripted, so it was pretty close to the script. There were a number of improv moments in the final cut that we absolutely loved. One of my favorite lines in the movie is when Kim Ann is sitting on her porch and Jill arrives and hands her a taco dip and Kim Ann asks “is it seven layers?” and Jill admits it’s only five and Kim Ann says “put it on the floor!” That line is totally improv’d by Mary in the moment. She’s just a dream.

JD: It’s true, our designers added so many things. It was something that we talked about from the very beginning, that we want there to be comedy in every frame of the movie. We love having Easter eggs. We found one after the SXSW screening. Dennis tells a joke at the soccer field and everyone laughs way too hard and he fancies himself a comedian. In the scene in Lisa’s living room when the kids are watching Kids with Knives and Dennis is sleeping, we found that the production designer Leigh Poindexter added a VHS tape that’s sitting on the coffee table that’s just labeled ‘Comedy’, as if Dennis has been studying comedy for his joke, which we thought was so funny.

Our costume designer Lauren Oppelt added so many little touches, but one we really loved: Nick is always wearing our family’s color, pink, and a very gender-normative blue. After Nick and Jill get divorced, he shows up in all beige to go get more pool water, but for the little logo on his polo Lauren embroidered a sad face. It was so funny. We loved that touch.

Finally, a question we’ve been asking filmmakers all year: which film made you want to become filmmakers? JD: It’s so, so long ago but I think for me it was Memento. I saw that when it first came out in the theater, with my Dad. I was just a child then but it blew my mind.

DL: Welcome to the Dollhouse. That was the first true dark comedy I saw where I was deeply disturbed by how much I was laughing. I want to make something like that too.

Related Letterboxd Lists

Sinister Suburbia: what’s really going on in that neighborhood?

Creepy Teenage Suburbia: “settings not limited to but including: high school hallways, proms, corn fields, religious dictatorships, convenience stores, football pitches, family compounds, back gardens.”

Films Directed by Women: Vanessa’s comprehensive—and growing—list of films directed by women.

‘Greener Grass’ is an IFC Midnight release. The film is out now in selected US cinemas and on streaming platforms. All production stills courtesy IFC Films.

[saltyslack-toast]

#KnockTheBook : Anne Frank

“The nice Anne is never present in company, hasn’t appeared one single time so far, but always predominates when we’re alone. I know exactly how I’d like to be, but, I’m only like that for myself. And perhaps that’s why, I’m sure it’s the reason why I say I’ve got a happy nature within and why other people think I’ve got a happy nature without. I am guided by the pure Anne within, but outside I’m nothing but a frolicsome little goat who’s broken loose”

I knew this book exist since I was in elementary school it was on the 6th grade I guess. I saw this book in one of the notability book store (re: Books and Beyond) in kinda so-so Bandung Mall (re again: Istana Plaza). I read the behind book preview and my curious ass was really intrigued, that time I didn’t know wtf is holocaust and my English skill was so poor, I mean like still but now its getting better right?????  My 11 years old wallet was penniless, so I didn’t buy the book,  that’s ok though because book wasn’t the main source of my happiness and I don’t really read much books that age. Many years later, there was BBW Bandung in 2019, and I’m so excited since I started to read quite a lot of books after I’m in college and just like that, I found a gem I’ve been wanting for since I was starting my puberty and now I’m at the edge of my puberty era (STILL COULDN’T MOVE ON FROM MY PUBERTY DAYS, PLEASE CHECK THE PREVIOUS POST OF MINE OR I’LL KILL U! Never mind it was a trash anyway). I’m gonna review this book in a way this book relating my life, because I SWEAR TO GOD Anne Frank is me in 1942 indeed.

Okay let’s cut the shit off of the personal history attached to this book, cause no one cares, no one probably read this master of shit.

The title of the book is “Diary of A Young Girl: Anne Frank” written clearly in the book’s grayish cover and it has a picture of queen Anne herself writing on her diary I suppose?? So it basically Anne frank writing her story and someone took a picture of her posing like she was writing the story and the picture became the cover of her story that she wrote when someone was taking that picture, got it?. The book is published by Wilco Publishing Book in 2013 in Mumbai, India. The book’s price is written on its cover, it was 19.95 in US Dollar and converted to Rupiah approximately worth RP 326.569, please note that I convert this price when USD 1 is worth RP 16.300 (fuck you corona). But don’t worry, if you are going to buy one in BBW the price is 50% cheaper than the original one, omg someone take me to BBW RIGHT.NOW!.

For those who dumb in history but insist to read this history-biography kind of book (WHICH IS STRANGELY CONTRADICTION, like dude u suppose to have good grades in history class if u like this kinda book, but whatevs I don’t judge), chillax there’s gonna be a short sum about what’s happened in WW II and the origin short story of Hitler gon’ mad with his bonkers political party. Also, there is a little summary about Anne’s previous life before she starts writing her diary in that crazy era she’s living. This book is literally her diary, I said diary, it means u could see her recounting her daily activities in a writing book (Except the fact that she named her diary with Kitty and consider it as her friend).

In this book, you are going to meet plenty bold characters. Here I describe few of ‘em that quite memorable for me. First is Queen Anne herself duh! She’s fucking THAT BRIGHT, I mean she was 13 when she wrote the story of her life, loves to read books, emotionally instable just like a mad teenage typical but she really has very unique perspective of how she depict the whole condition when she was in hiding. Second is her fucking family duh!(2), her mummy is weirdly kind of remind me to my mom FOR REAL, both of them were as problematic as her youngest daughter, sensitive, and caring as regular moms out there. Daddy is totally a sweetheart and kind of hard-working just like most of the Jews I guess?? And Margot which is Anne’s older sister, you know that golden child in the family who always be the spotlight in your big family gathering? Yes she is one of the kinds. Not only Anne and her family that is pretty intriguing, but there is also one little family which also joined Anne’s family in hiding, that is Mr. Van Daan Family and all of their dramas *applauding* that is caused by Mrs. Van Daan’s deportment (She’s quiet funny for me though) . There is still a lot amount of characters that is also involved in this book, but you can read the book by yourself its good honey trust me its good and worth it.

I think for the first time I managed to look serious in previous paragraph right?

What’s very interesting to me is how Anne and her mom fighting could be very relatable to all of us. The peak of these fighting dramas was on Friday, April 2nd 1943, when Anne refuses to have her mum took prayers with her, I would say that was truly heart breaking moment. You know the time when you had a huge fight with your mom and you feel so miserable because you disgust the situation where no one was there for you and all you can do is to blame yourself because you love your mom and realized that she got nothing wrong, and what you did is  self-loathing all days long, as her mom said,

“I don’t want to be cross, love cannot be forced”

I’m on my fucking tears for reading that sentence, perhaps people that has lots of problem with their life might be understand exactly how it feels, for longing to just vanish from the world because die in all likelihood would still make people around to be distressed because of you? (OMG Ana, u really need stop exposing yourself!). However, after all the fights with her mum, Anne figured out that it’s only the matter of unpleasantness and misery rebounding all the time. She learned that it still much better for hard words on paper than to be carried along with her mum’s heart (it’s a pro tip y’all!).

“Leave me in peace, let me sleep one night at least without my pillow being wet with tears, my eyes burning and my head throbbing. Let me get away from it all, preferably away from the world!”

           Anne was hiding for 761 days, of course many things happened and her relationship with Peter (the only son of the Van Daan’s family) is one of the cutest story I liked. Peter was 3 years older than Anne, in my vision he’s the type of nonchalant chap, yet very sweet inside. Started with Ana’s frustration to be alone, ended with having another person other than her family to be talked to. Peter and Anne, after they were close to each other (because they weren’t really get along together at first), they spent most of their times in the attic which is Peter’s basecamp in the annex, talking about life as a teenager and their complicated family before the life in the annex. It kinda remind me of how surviving life becoming the point of how we see each other’s color, Anne had become comfortable to talk with Peter about all her difficulty and so otherwise. Anyway, their fucking love story gonna prompt you to the nostalgia of young love in mid school.

“Already this morning I noticed that peter kept looking at me all the time, not in ordinary way I don’t know how, I just can’t explain……. I made a special effort not to look at him too much, because whenever I did, he kept on looking too and it gave me a lovely feeling inside...”

It’s not over yet, there’s going to be a lot of scenes that giving you goosebumps which cause by a burglar, yes not a ghost, but a fucking burglar, and other shits that would give you a nerve because Anne’s diary also described how the current war situations going (IT WAS SO INTENSE F U HITLER ROTS IN HELL U DUMBASS). The war was not only happened outside the annex but also inside, the war over making noises when everyone’s sleeping and the use of a little table in afternoon between Anne and Mr. Dussel, I perceived it quite hilarious!

. That’s probably a glance of how this book is so intriguing for me. The perspective of Anne Frank of everything sometimes could be so naïve but also relating to my life as well, even until today. Especially during this corona outbreak which has becoming the pandemic, I’ve stay at my home only for 39 days but already feeling sick even for an introvert and antisocial like me could be that JADED, so right now y’all bitch imagine being Anne Frank have to stayed in a hiding for fucking more than 2 years with exactly the same annoying people every fucking day. Nevertheless, if you guys interested to read this book you can buy it in BBW which available in Tokopedia on 27th April until 3rd May this year, so please don’t miss the chance! (to be noted that im not having any relation to BBW, im just so happy that this bazaar coming up into my life). And also you can check the official website of Anne Frank House in www.annefrank.org, there’s a lot of information you could uncover about Anne and other people in furthermore and the visual of the hiding they have been living (IT’S SO MUCH COOL BRUUH).

I think that’s it, I really had no idea how to review a book, this shit just basically me mumbling my opinion about the books I have read. I hope my writing is getting better than the previous post (even I thought this trash was a degrading quality of mine). And a bit information, I finished and posted this writing in the time of corona virus, it was so hard to everyone enduring all the negative impact from this pandemic on our life, so please if you’re lucky enough to  still be able enjoy all the fortunes, please help those who badly impacted of this pandemic and I. BEG. YOU. TO. STAY. AT. YOUR. FUCKING. OWN. HOME. If you’re still strolling around for unimportant purpose and not even using a mask, im literally gonna kill you bitch!

So yeah, that’d be all. Thank you for read until this much guys!

*me talking to non-existing audience*

Xiao, see you in advance!

[depizan]

Oh my brain. Can I just register how completely bonkers it is for there to be uniformed Imperials and Sith running around on Coruscant fighting Republic soldiers 10 years after the Treaty Of Coruscant? Because it just makes no goddamn sense whatsoever.

Yes, yes, the Treaty was unbalanced and all that. But there is a general implication in game that the Republic is some kind of threat to the Empire. That war is something both sides want to avoid (generally speaking, anyway), at least for Chapter One. Yes there are other hinkey things here and there, but generally the Republic isn’t supposed to be attacking the Empire and the Empire isn’t supposed to be attacking the Republic. Yes, they are both fucking around and doing all kinds of Treaty breaking things all over the place, but they are generally doing so with some attempt at secrecy or some sort of plausible deniability.

(And yes, the game writing mostly isn’t very good at that, either. And I sometimes have the cynical thought that the reason so many Imperial enemies are illogically wearing uniforms in Chapter One of the Republic stuff is because the game devs thought we were too stupid to recognize out of uniform Imperials.)

Or maybe I just keep wanting the basic set up of SWTOR to make sense, so I continually remember it as a sensible, coherent universe, only to get a cold tuna of WTF to the face any time I actually start poking at it.

I could believe in Imperials officially and openly on Coruscant since officially the two governments are not at war and embassies are a thing in reality. (In which case there should also be a Republic embassy on Dromund Kaas.) I could believe that some of those Imperials would be up to no good. (Likewise some of those Republic people.) The two governments spending their cold war poking each other cautiously (particularly through third parties or in other secret fashions) is very plausible.

I could believe in Imperials operating secretly on Coruscant because, again, that kind of thing happens. (Likewise, I’d believe in Republic people operating secretly on Dromund Kaas.)

I don’t know. Maybe I’m confused about how things work and it’s completely plausible. Coruscant is such a mess that it almost seems plausible that a uniformed Imperial could walk into the Senate Tower and shoot the Chancelor on live holonet and the Republic would cover it up (so to speak) because another war would destroy them entirely. (Then again a year or two later and the war’s back on and the Republic isn’t instantly curbstomped, so no, that’s not it.)

Ungh. I frequently feel like the only solution is to just make up my own damned continuity and throw out whatever portions of canon don’t fit. “Yes, it’s an AU. It’s an AU where things make sense, damn it.”

[serenagaywaterford]

14) possible. Huge mistake, imo" Yeah. The show is already dragging. If they keep this up, the series will eventually lose a lot of its charm and meaning. e) "So, without June around I feel like Serena will just go back to old ways. Which is ridic cos she is an intelligent, powerful woman when she actually has the balls." Indeed. It's like Gilead has taken its toll on her and reduced her to a coward. Pre-Gilead Serena was a firecracker, even if she was fighting on the wrong side (that sounded

15) manichaeistic, but you know what I mean). For the record, I do believe they’ll give her some sort of redemption at some point. I’m just a little pessimistic. How are they gonna sell it as plausible and organic after 2x10? We’ll see, I guess. f) “It was just such a prime example of exactly how they maintain power in Gilead and how they managed to get it working: estranging women from each other.” SO. MUCH. GOLD. Suffice it to say, I really liked that June confronted Fred, after she didn’t

16) manage to get through Serena’s walls (and pride).And don’t get me started on that white rose. Every single flower has a special meaning/symbolism on this show and given that the garden is the only thing left to Serena at this point (kudos for admitting that knitting sucks, Serena, I’m 100% with you on that LMAO)… Word though. That music box and the flower were certainly nice gifts (small steps are better than none), but I still think that Serena could have done better. If she could get rid

17) of Cushing that easily, she could have let June see Hannah. That would have been an EXCELLENT way to express her gratitude/show her kindness, but alas. As for June’s excitement with the gifts? I smiled, I couldn’t help it. But I also felt a little sad for her. She’s so used to Serena abusing her and treating her like a baby machine (instead of an actual person), that such a little kindness makes her happy af. It really astonishes me how empathic June is with Serena (funny aka not funny at

18) all how that same empathy doesn’t extend to Fred) in the finale, even after the 2x10 incident. She’s certainly got some Stockholm Syndrome going on, but it’s also not that simple? There’s the codependency (fuck you Fred), the intellectual compatibility (writer/editor), the fact they’re both victims of Gilead now and that they both didn’t try to burst their own personal bubbles when it mattered (pre-Gilead). Holly tried to wake June up of course, because things were looking grim, but June

19) ignored her. Damn, I could go and on about this toxic yet fascinating duo, but I’ll restrain myself.

———-

[I had to look up what manichaeistic means, and now I’ve learnt a new word! :D Also, yes, I totally get what you mean.] Firecracker is a good word. I feel like she’s one of those people who is super enthusiastic about ideals, and thinks they’re great ideas, and then… learns the hard way and is killed by their own ideas. (Literally or metaphorically.) She’s so interesting to watch because her pre-Gilead persona was quite a bit different, just in a different way than the other women. Hers isn’t so much a physical cage (like Handmaids and Marthas are literal slaves) as a psychological one. 

I honestly don’t know how they think they’re going to convince the viewers that Serena even deserves any sort of redemption story. 2x10 was a serious nail in the coffin. The only way I can even see it working if Serena suffers A LOT, shows genuine remorse and understanding, AND if we see things from June’s POV who gives Serena a pass for every single horrible thing she does. Serena is like June’s blindspot. It’s mental. Like you said, June is shockingly empathetic with Serena who doesn’t deserve it at all. She just never seems to give up on her no matter what horrible shit she does. Like??? And, yes, there is clearly some Stockholm Syndrome thing going on but it seems to me anyway, that June is very forgiving (most cos she has to be to survive physically and mentally) and that she’s really fucking good at compartmentalizing. If I’m correct about that last one, it’s going to come back and bite her in the ass one day and there will be a breakdown. You can only stuff things away in little boxes for so long before it all falls down. I have to think the relationship (whatever it is, antagonistic or cooperative) is so much more complex. 

I think to some degree, June sees Serena for what (a loser) she is and that is very scary for Serena, but for June it allows her to empathise a bit easier than most. I don’t think we as viewers even get many glimpses of Serena, just chilled out and herself as you would EXPECT a human being to be. One of those is 2x06 where I think the OG Serena comes thru esp the night fireside where Serena is like… a completely different person?? From the weird parroting of June’s slang, and probably one of the only times we actually see her smile authentically at feeling the baby move, to that weirdass attempt at bonding during that Handmaid party (wtf), she’s so socially awkward around women it’s unbelievable. (Maybe that’s the guilt when you’re faced with all these women your perfect society has enslaved!) But it’s like she really wants to make a connection for some reason. And then when June asks to see Hannah, and Serena just starts crying??? And we find out as she throws a plant pruning tantrum in her safe space lol it’s cos she thought her and June were actually becoming friends?????? LIKE. WHAT IS HAPPENING. What is this high school shit? That episode made it seem like Serena just really wants a girl friend and is pissed off cos she thinks June was only being nice to get close to her daughter –which duh. “I DID THESE WHOLE 3 NICE THINGS! WHY DOES SHE KEEP ASKING TO SEE HER KID? WHAT A DEVIOUS BITCH!!!!” (Clearly the other Wives aren’t real friends.) MAYBE, and I’m just throwing this out there, the best way to make friends is not kidnapping, enslaving, raping, and assaulting the girl you want to be your bestie lol??? Just a wild thought, Serena.

I’m not trying to woobiefy Serena, but when I watch that episode, it’s just such a different Serena than we’ve seen except in other glimpses (and usually those were just because Serena was directly getting something she wants), but in 2x06 she stays very consistent in it. And, incidentally, she doesn’t attack June at the end. She just runs off and sulks like a child. Then 2 episodes later, with Fred out of the picture, she’s back to wanting to be besties again, coming to June’s room and confiding in her and asking her advice and blah blah blah. It’s shit like that that make me wonder if that’s the side June relies on in order to be able to forgive Serena–for her own survival.

Maybe I give Serena way too much credit. That’s possible. She’s still an awful terrible person, but there may be a tiny sliver of humanity in there somewhere.

So if we see more of that Serena who doesn’t resort to violence every time something doesn’t go her way, and we view her thru June’s eyes rather than our own, perhaps they can finagle some sort of not-completely-bonkers redemption arc. But it’ll be really difficult imo.

ANYWAY. 

Yes, I thought those moments at Serena’s door and then going to Fred was brilliant. Like, you can see that June knows EXACTLY what is going on with Serena, and how disappointed and annoyed she is that Serena folded so easily, and now June’s on her own again so she has to go protect herself and kneel to the king to save herself.

I have mixed feelings about the music box. It’s so… trivial and stupid and juvenile on the one hand. It’s very symbolic on the other, even June sees it. The girl in the box. And then, when you consider that Serena likely has very little she can give to June in terms of physical objects (since basically Wives had to throw away everything) so she gave her her childhood music box which she was likely saving for her imaginary daughter. If you take it that way, it is meaningful. But that’s just fanwank really. And, it locks. That may mean nothing, but it may mean something. June has literally nothing else of her own that has any sort of privacy but Serena gives her a box AND the key to lock it. 

Honestly, lol, when I first watched 2x08 and Serena is like, “I won’t forget your help”, I turned to my friend and was like, “Was that a threat?” Like you just can’t tell sometimes with Serena. I was relieved when it wasn’t in fact a threat lol.

I agree SO HARD about the flower/music box gift in 2x08 though. Like, c’mon. Firstly, bitch, you’re recycling gifts now? You’re just giving her BACK something you took away to punish her. And a flower, which will die. With all her connections, she easily could have given June something about Hannah, either a visit or a photo or a drawing or SOMETHING. This is something I still don’t get about Serena: why she is SO FUCKING OPPOSED to letting June have anything to do with Hannah? Maybe you have a theory? It’s one of those things I don’t get. Is it cos she’s jealous June has a child and she doesn’t? Is it just a power play thing? WHAT THE HELL IS HER PROBLEM WITH JUNE AND HANNAH? Like, she easily could have June eating out of her hand if she arranged a visit(or two) with Hannah. Instead, she throws temper tantrums any time June brings up Hannah. IDGI. Sigh.

And yeah, if you really want to show June your gratitude, it takes more than a fucking child’s toy. And ITA. The saddest part was how happy June was just to have that box. She was literally hugging it like a child and it broke my heart. Like, that’s what she’s been reduced to by Gilead, and the Waterfords. 

(Side note: I feel like June is one of the worst treated Handmaids on a daily basis? Like, sure, Naomi doesn’t like Janine but they have a much nicer house, gorgeous room, she gets ice-cream, etc. Janine fucking BIT Naomi to the point she bled, and she doesn’t appear to be punished for it at all! Can you imagine if June bit Serena? All hell would break loose. There’s that Wife that feels for Emily and tries not to do Ceremonies, and she plays with the dog and stuff. And I don’t know how bad/good it was for Lilly, but she said she preferred it over her previous life. Meanwhile June’s trapped in the dark, musty attic and Serena insists on making her life extra-miserable every chance she gets, including not even allowing June to wean Nicole (intentionally).)

And despite that, June is still like, “Well, Serena deserves my kindness.” WHAT. June is a much better person than I would be. Then again, I can’t help thinking at least in the finale, that June felt a little guilt. Serena never would have lost a finger if she hadn’t pushed her to do it. BUT THAT’S MOTHERHOOD. Sacrifice not for yourself (like Serena does), but yourself for your children. I read some interview where the showrunners were saying the main line through S2 was June teaching Serena how to be a mother. And that really didn’t make sense to me for a while. And it really solidified June’s pure, unabated hatred for Fred. As if slapping him wasn’t hint enough, she leaves Serena’s room after comforting her, and confronts Fred about it. If I was Fred, I’d be even more concerned then than when I found the rose tbh. If June is willing to come after Fred directly after he had his own wife maimed, in defense of said wife, that’s some bond right there. But then, June doesn’t seem to give a fuck about Fred at all and isn’t scared of him at all. Which, is smart in a way, cos he’s so grossly obsessed with her that she can get away with virtually anything. 

“There’s the codependency (fuck you Fred), the intellectual compatibility (writer/editor), the fact they’re both victims of Gilead now and that they both didn’t try to burst their own personal bubbles when it mattered (pre-Gilead).“

OMG. OMG. OMG. YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SOMEONE SAYS IT!!!

That last bit is something I sort of keep to myself cos like criticising June isn’t on my list of fav things to do but I thought the show was trying to make it REALLY clear that June was pretty late to the party when it comes to Gilead. Like, she had so many warning signs, even Moira was calling shit out, and she just sort of went along with the Gilead prep. Holly (a lot) and Moira (to some degree) were both like “WAKE UP!” But June and Luke just la-dee-da’ed around like “Oh it’s not that bad.” There’s the bathtub analogy and she even comments on how nobody really paid proper attention when it was building. So, at least she knows. 

I’m not hating ofc. I think almost everybody would behave the same. You see it already in some places. So, I’m not saying June is terrible for not doing more and it’s easy for us to say, “OMG. If that shit started here I’d be outta America so quickly!” But, at the end of the day, most people just sit by and watch.

But I mean insinuating in any way that June deserves what she got gets the wrath of Hell. Not that I am saying that! Nobody deserves what those women get but it’s important to think critically about these characters and if June recognises she was idle until it was too late, I think as viewers we should be able to say the same. Without it being taken as victim blaming, which I am very much NOT doing.

Also, as an aside, I understand how problematic it can be to suggest that June’s forgiveness of Serena is the desirable outcome cos IRL I think forgiving abusers is a very dangerous path to go down. It never ends well. (Although I am also someone who counts restorative justice as a viable option for some crimes. I studied it for a term in uni and it’s not something I can discount. I don’t think punitive/retributive justice is always the answer. Note: I’m talking about Serena’s crimes against June specifically here; her other wider crimes require something stronger than a healing circle lol.) The only thing I can think of is the entire environment of Gilead is so different that perhaps if you remove environment, people can change. It’s a very dangerous game to play and I certainly wouldn’t suggest this to anybody in the real world... I just, I want Serena to get some sort of redemption--and I don’t mean “happy ending”. Just something... else. And I am not opposed in the THT universe to June forgiving her. Simply cos there’s a bit in the book (IIRC) about forgiveness being true power and it seems like the idea the show is playing with. It’s something I remember from my childhood indoctrination at church as well, this whole “forgiveness is power!” mantra. I’m not sure I buy it. (I think it could be freedom, but I dunno. I’m no theologian or philosopher.) Ah. I’m conflicted.

“Damn, I could go and on about this toxic yet fascinating duo, but I’ll restrain myself. “

PLEASE DO NOT RESTRAIN YOURSELF. IMO they are indeed the most toxic yet fascinating pair on the show and I could read your thoughts about them forever. Not to mention, I feel like the actors have really good chemistry and play off each other exceptionally well. Again, I can’t recall the exact interview but I think it was Yvonne talking about the process and she and Moss really walk thru it and figure out everything. All that work shows. Honestly, this cast is strong. Like I can think of 6 of them that are excellent, a few that are pretty good, and then some blahs (no names mentioned lol). Ann Dowd totally deserved that Emmy for S1 and I honestly, I know I’m completely biased and all, but Yvonne’s S2 performance was stronger than Ann, AND everyone else in that category tbh. So nuanced.