#this one was such a ride and I loved every second of it

[jamminvroomvroom]

let’s go ride.

LN x fem!reader

in which lando keeps getting frustrated and you wanna know why…

hiiiiii here u go! belated love day fic from me to you 💝 love u all, tysm for the love on my last few fics, i’ve had a lot going on lately so i’ve not had very much time to write but when the inspo hits….. shoutout to miss mcrae for dropping lando-coded bangers bc i literally cannot resist. might make a part 2 of all the times they get freaky in a car lmao, lemme know if you want that! likes, comments and reblogs are sooooo appreciated so lemme know what u think xoxox

proofed by my own personal goat @lavenderlando 💖

songs to set the vibes: sports car by tate mcrae, bad guy by billie eilish

warnings: 18+!! minors begone! smut, language, fluff, bit of angst bc lando’s in a mood, friends to lovers, p in v, porn without plot but there is a little bit of plot, bitchy lando

4.2k words

you sit in silence, opening spotify and preparing to fiddle with the bluetooth as he slips into the drivers seat beside you. the car door slams shut and he huffs, jawline taut with annoyance. the hood of his car is surrounded, a million and one cameras pointed at you both as he tries to relax into his chair. the engine roars to life and you side eye him.

“when are you gonna learn, hm?” you try and sound playful, teasing, but it comes out laced with a twang of scolding. lando tenses up even further, turning to glare at you.

“god forbid i go outside.” he snaps.

“give over.” you roll your eyes. “poor me, i’m famous! lando, you can’t get angry when you park in the most high profile spot on the fucking planet and your fans want to worship you.”

“you don’t know what you’re talking about.” he sighs, white knuckles wrapping tighter around the steering wheel.

“don’t i? this has been happening a lot lately.” your voice softens, ever so slightly. “every time i’m seen with you, you lash out.”

“because i don’t want people harassing you, looking at you like some fucking commodity.” lando snarls, steely eyes locked on the supposed car enthusiasts that are slowly backing away from his parking space.

“lando, we’re friends. this has always been a thing. why is it bothering you so much now?”

you wonder if it bothers him for the same reason it bothers you.

he shuts his eyes, collecting himself for a moment. he puts the car in drive and smoothly pulls out of the space, ignores your question. you scowl at him, at this sudden childishness that has overtaken his easygoing manner in the last few months.

“fine. whatever.” you mutter, slumping defeatedly into your seat. you give up on playing music, leaving him to bask in the silence, something he loathed.

lando had switched from his usual self to this stony, irate version of him that you rarely had the displeasure of seeing, from the second you walked out of the restaurant where you’d had lunch. he was reluctant to pose for photos and sign hats, something he usually revelled in, grateful that people even wanted to see him. the swathes of fans that had gathered had irked him for once, but what really boiled his blood was the photographers that seemed to find him no matter where he chose to spend him time. so much for monaco’s privacy laws.

it wasn’t like he cared about himself, either. it was you. the way they leered, leaned close to you while he was distracted with pens being shoved in his face. it was the way their eyes dipped low, whether you were in a tank top or a baggy hoodie. it was the way they spread the false, painful narrative all over the internet that you and lando were together, which drove hoards of losers into your comment section and your DMs just to call you names.

you were not together. as much as it pained him, you were just friends.

he couldn’t exactly explain his overprotectiveness to you without getting himself into a big, tangled mess. you, being the resilient, cool as a cucumber stoic that you were didn’t care what fourteen year olds on the internet thought about you. you weren’t about to let faceless, jobless trolls ruin the friendship that you’d nurtured for years, through ups and downs, thick and thin, race wins and huge losses. but lando, god, it killed him, tore him up inside every time someone so much as looked at you wrong.

“you really don’t get it.” he says, hushed, like he’s telling a secret. you turn to look at him, tearing your eyes away from the glistening view of the marina.

“lando, tell me then. make it make sense because i’ve never seen you behave like this. they love you! least you can do is lose the attitude over some harmless pictures.”

“jesus christ, it’s not the fans! it’s not the ‘harmless pictures’! it’s these fucking creeps that follow us around just to make some money off of my own personal hell. you really don’t get it, because if you did, you’d know that it breaks my fucking heart to see the way people talk about you online, just for being seen with me. it’s my fault that you get harassed, that paps are basically stalking you now.”

he signs of his rant with a sharp inhale, one that seems to suck all of the life out of the car. you melt.

“but lando, it doesn’t bother me. i just wanna be here with you, i don’t care about the rest of it.” you coo softly, reaching over the centre console to grip his forearm.

“and i want you here. i want you with me every fucking second of the day, but i can’t cope. can’t help thinking that one day it’ll all just be too much and you’ll leave me.” he whispers.

“never. never ever ever.” you promise. your belly swirls with emotions, tickled from the inside out by butterflies that threaten to swarm.

lando breathes shakily, warmed through by the hand that rests on his arm as he manoeuvres through the twisty lanes. as he hits traffic and slows, he clocks another photographer looming on the pavement, lens aimed at his windshield. already too annoyed, he aggressively smacks his sun visor down, leaning over the console to reach yours too, pulling it down. he prays it’s enough.

“you need to relax, lan. i’m fine, we’re fine. i promise.” you reassure, but he’s breathing heavily now. “you don’t worry this much when it’s max.” you trail off.

he doesn’t know what comes over him. he spins the car into a sharp u-turn, positively speeding back in the direction you’d just come from. any mention of you and him as a ‘we’ makes him crazy, makes him utterly lose his mind, but something about your sweet, earnest voice bringing him back to reality has left him completely shaken. the sun is setting now, most people clearing out of the underground car park he pulls into to head back to their homes. he has other intentions. you don’t say another word until he pulls into a space at the back of the lot, tucked neatly into a corner.

“what are we doing?”

“need a minute.” lando rasps, forehead resting on his steering wheel, the matte leather pushing his sharp curls back. you trail your eyes over him, the way his chest rises and falls under the sweatshirt he’s wearing, the way his thick fingers curl as his grip continues to tighten.

“i’m jealous. and i’m selfish. and i’m a complete fucking idiot.” lando says, steadily, like he’s reading the news.

“you’re… you’re jealous? of what?” you’re like a deer in headlights.

“of any other person that gets to lay their fucking eyes on you.”

“what are you saying?” you whisper. the air in the car goes still, frozen. you can’t breathe.

“i’m saying… that you’re mine. and i should have made that a known fact a long time ago.” ever so slowly he looks up at you, and you gasp at the intensity of his stare. he’s gazing at you with complete conviction in his eyes, a whole lot of vulnerability mixed in with the sincerity of his words. “i don’t want anyone else anywhere near you. lose my fucking mind watching the way they look at you.”

“lando…” you trail off, eyes as wide as saucers. is he really saying what you think he’s saying?

“i know this is terrible of me, to do this now, here - to do this at all, to be honest. i know that i have no right to stake some kind of claim on you, and i know that you probably don’t feel the same, but god, i just needed you to know. if you want me to shut the fuck up or leave you alone forever then i totally get it but-“

“oh my god, are you stupid?” you shake your head, still stuck in your state of disbelief, but you muster the coherency to grip the collar of his crewneck, tug him close.

your lips meet hastily, urgently, and every ounce to tension seems to seep out of the car. he moans at the very sensation of you against him, breath caught in his throat when you lace your finger through his hair like you want to mould your faces together, never stop. his brain finally catches up, awestruck as he is, and you trade passion and saliva, bumping noses as you clash chaotically.

“i think we’re both stupid.” he mumbles into your lips. you shut him up with another kiss, fiery and needy, and his hands begin to wander. he smoothes over the back of your jumper until he finds your waist, awkward in the limited space of the front of the car, and skims his hands up until he’s made his way beneath the material and he’s gripping your bare skin.

“too forward of me to ask you to get in the back?” lando pants with a cheeky smile.

“you literally just marked your territory on me, and nearly bit a photographer. i think we’re past ‘forward’.” you deadpan.

“then get in the fucking back.” he grins, devilish and commanding. you do as you’re told, wriggling between the leather until you’re propped up against the backseat. lando follows, sitting beside you, tugs you into his lap like you’re weightless.

you can feel him beneath you, hard and wanting, and you mewl, keen into him. your breaths mingle in the nonexistent space, lips brushing gently.

“this okay?” lando’s lips ghost over yours and you lean forward, just enough to reach him. he pulls back, eyes hooded, teasing, and tuts. “use your words.”

“who knew you were such a bossy boots.” you smirk. “more than okay.”

his eyes glaze over once he has your permission, and he kisses you like you’re the last supply of oxygen on earth. he licks into your mouth, wet and desperate and you whimper as he grazes over the crease of your thigh, toying with the hem of your skirt where it’s ridden up.

“can feel you.” lando groans, pulling away to look between your bodies. “so warm for me, you like seeing me all riled up?”

you nod coyly, lip caught between your teeth, and you swear you see his eyelashes flutter.

“what did i say about words?” lando composes himself enough to tease. you roll your eyes, but you can’t ignore the way heat rolls through your body.

“like when you get all bitchy.” you reply, rolling your hips once.

“bitchy?”

“mhm. always been so easy to toy with.” you whisper, leaning in to nose along the thickness of his neck. you drag your tongue up the vein there, feeling it pulse under your tongue. he smells like his cologne, so him, and it makes you even hotter.

“oh, so you’ve been playing with me?” he chokes out, eyes rolling back in his head at the marks you’re leaving.

“maybe a little.” you hum.

“you liked watching me get angry? pretending to be all sweet and clueless?” lando whispers, the words hanging heavy in the space between you. all you can manage in response is a mischievous smile that twists his tummy.

your hands trail under his sweatshirt, skating over the muscled ripples of his belly, ever so slightly dipping into the band of his sweats. his head lulls back, blindly holding you close while you worship him. he lets you, lets himself have this moment, thinking for so long that it would never come.

“waited so long,” your lips brush over the shell of his ear, tongue grazing the lobe. he descends into a mess of shivers. “needed you to break first. i knew you would.” you croon.

“you’ve been loving this, haven’t you?” lando starts, low and calculating. “bet you’ve been getting off on dressing like a whore for the cameras, watching me suffer.” he pieces together. your resolve cracks. “bad girl.”

the sense of control you’d briefly maintained shatters, a hand around your neck forcing you away from him, preventing your sweet torture. his fingers flex, just above your collarbone, and you swallow at the smirk that seems to engulf his entire face. he looks animalistic, crazed with a feral adoration that leaves you certain that you’re dripping all over his lap.

“i think you’ve had your fun, baby, it’s my turn.”

you whine when he drags you across his lap, back and forth until you’re squirming. his hips rut up into yours, fuelling your desire for every single inch of him.

“please, lando.” you breathe, reaching out to lace your fingers into the curls at the nape of his neck.

“let me look at you.” he demands, shutting down your intentions for more. “i’ve waited long enough for this, don’t you think?”

“so have i.” you beg him with your eyes, but give in to him nonetheless. you’re staining his lap, grey sweats darkening as your wetness pools there and he can’t help but buck up into your warmth.

“wanna play with you, baby, see how you like it.” he taunts, bringing two fingers between your legs.

he brushes his knuckles over the obvious damp patch at the crotch of your panties, lip caught between his teeth at what he finds. your soaked through, and he pinches your bundle of nerves just to watch you thrash in his grip.

“i hate you right now.” you spit through gritted teeth, but your hips can’t help but chase his hand.

“doesn’t feel like it.” he kisses you quick, loving the way you lean in for more, but he relaxes against the seat and dips slowly beneath your underwear. “fuck.”

he doesn’t have to work too hard to spread your wetness around, you’re already lathered in it, but he continues to tease, fingers gliding over your clit and through your folds.

“please.” you beg, leaning back to give him as much access as possible.

“what do you want, baby? tell me.” he urges, drawing circles on the swollen bundle of nerves.

“your fingers.”

“you have them.” he barks out a condescending laugh, applying more pressure just to prove his point.

“need them inside of me.” you pant, eyes squeezing shut at his sadistic game between your thighs.

“that’s my girl.” he praises, and you curse, clamping down around him before he even gets the first knuckle inside of you.

“how are you doing this to me?” you think aloud, tears in your waterline already. it all feels far too good for a first time.

“because i know you better than you think i do.” he coos.

lando pulls you flush against him, grinding his fingers deep so that they curl deliciously against your sweet spot. his palm bumps your clit with every twist of digits and he nips over your collarbone. his tongue laves over your skin, tasting the perspiration that gathers as the car steams up around you. you’re suddenly hyper aware of your surroundings, huddled together in the back of his urus in a dimly lit car park. thank god you’d lost the photographers.

“can’t believe we’re doing this.” you gasp, feeling your tummy tighten at the thrill of it all, of feeling your best friend work to please you.

“i knew it would happen. knew that someday i’d get to see you like this, all for me.”

“all for you.” you repeat, drunk on him as you rode his fingers. “feels so good.”

“want you to come for me like this.” lando orders, replacing the heel of his hand with his thumb against your clit. his ministrations are more controlled like this, precise, and you throw your head back in pleasure. his teeth sink in to the base of your neck, sucking softly over the bruising skin, lapping at the mark to soothe it.

“i’m so close, lan.”* you choke, riding his fingers as you near your release.

“c’mon baby, make a mess for me.” he urges, eyes locked intensely on yours. you’re enticed by the sea green storm that swirls in his irises, shrinking as his pupils blow with lust. you can’t help it, can’t delay the inevitable, and you thrash in his arms, wildly bucking your hips against his as you fall apart.

you gush all over his lap, further ruining his sweatpants but he doesn’t bat an eyelid, working you through your orgasm until you’re spent. he’s transfixed by the way your thighs glisten, by the way your release seeps through the material covering his crotch and it makes him throb.

“that’s it baby.” he murmurs, voice low and smooth. you pant, collapsing forwards onto him.

“thank you.” you whisper into his neck, and he laughs softly.

“don’t thank me, silly girl.” he coos into your ear. you pull back just enough to kiss him, taking it slow, giving you a moment to come down from your devastatingly intense high. you’re exhausted, eyes fluttering shut from the exertion, and he tucks sweaty strands of your hair behind your ears. his fingers graze your warmed cheeks, noses bumping and you take him in, carefully studying the lines of his face, the sharp slope of his nose, the flutter of his eyelashes against those ridiculously high cheekbones.

“you’re so pretty.” your voice floats over him like a delicate caress, makes him shiver. he grins at you, enamoured.

“didn’t think our first time would be in the back of my car but i don’t think i can’t wait to get you home.”

“you’ve thought about this?” you ask, bashful. he gazes up at you sheepishly.

“every night before bed.” he jokes, and you shift your hips.

you’re overstimulated, but it does the trick, the playful haze shattering, replaced by thick, charged tension.

“you gonna make that fantasy a reality?”

“yeah. yeah, i am.” he mumbles.

his hands skim your waist, pushing your jumper up as he goes higher and higher, until it’s off, chucked into the footwell. you tear at his sweatshirt until it joins your discarded clothing and explore the bronzed planes of his chest, extra sun-kissed by the trip you’d taken to dubai just a few weeks before. if only you’d known then…

“hurry.” you plead, and he scoffs, adjusting you on his lap just enough to free himself from his sweatpants and boxers, and you gawk down at what’s revealed to you.

it’s big, thick, and you sigh in relief that he’d so thoroughly stretched you out, got you nice and slick for him already.

“gonna take it all for me?” lando taunts, catching your hanging jaw between two firm fingers, forcing you to look at him.

“gonna try.” you reason, breathing shakily as you rise up on your knees. you feel the head of his cock prodding your clit, the sodden tip running along your folds until it catches on your entrance. you both hiss as the contact, his hands steadying your hips.

“you can do it, baby.” lando promises, helps you begin your descent.

“oh my god.” you gasp, sinking down slowly. “dunno if i can take it, lan, you’re so- so…” you trail off, head thrown back far enough that you miss the way he’s smirking up at you.

“c’mon baby, being such a good girl for me, i know you can take it. just a little more.” he goads, pressing each button of your apparent praise kink, and you whine, soft moans tumbling from your lips. a sense of determination becomes you, and you’re aching to take him all the way.

you cry out his name when you’re pressed flush against him, and he soothes circles into your hips, holding you close against his chest. one hand smoothes through your hair, the lace of your bra scratching against his chest as you breathe rapidly.

“well done, baby, knew you could do it.” lando praises, trailing kisses over your face. you quiver in his hold, hips wiggling ever so slightly, and he takes that as a sign. “want me to do the work, hmm? make you feel so good?”

you nod lazily, looking up at him from where your face is smushed against his shoulder, and he lets you break his rule of “words”, softened by how beautiful you look, vulnerable in his strong arms. he starts to move, fucking up into you slowly, feeling you out. you can feel him twitch inside of you, his breath catching in his throat at the feeling of you, tight and warm, enveloped all around him. you roll your hips languidly, meeting his thrusts and you both moan out as the explosion of sensations unfolds between you.

“harder, lando. can take it.” you mumble, glazed over doe eyes looking into his. he tenses up, shaken to the very core by the emotional tether between you, feeling the way it grows even stronger. the one woman he’d wanted since he’d laid eyes on you, the one women he never thought he could have; his heart pounds violently in his chest.

he readjusts your hips, pushing you back so that you’re upright once more, eyes raking hungrily over your flushed body. your skirt is bunched around your waist, panties tugged to the side, cups of your bra barely covering anything anymore. he tweaks a nipple through the lace, paws at your tits until you’re fluttering around him. the cups of your bra are tugged down, resting below your breasts and he swallows hard.

“fuck me, you’re so beautiful.” lando rasps, leaning you back further to perfect the angle.

once he’s satisfied, he bounces you against him, meeting your hips with harsh thrusts, his pace unrelenting. he can see the way you pool around his base, dampening the thatching of hair that decorates his pelvic bone. you seem to chase the friction there, rutting your clit against him. sweet puffs of breath fill his ears, melodic combined with a symphony of your needy whines, continuously intensifying as he fucks you deeper and deeper.

“it’s so good.” you slur, mouth hanging open, totally unhinged from the raw pleasure that he courses through your veins.

“you’re doing so good for me, baby.” he wants to say more, but then he sees it, the way your lower belly seems to protrude with every roll of his hips. “oh, fuck.” he cries out.

“do you see that, baby? see how deep i am?” lando growls, voice rippling through your connected bodies. you glance down, and the first tears start to fall.

“oh my god.” you repeat, nothing else to say, totally braindead at the sight. your cheeks are wet with tear tracks, utterly overwhelmed by the way he’s taking you, so blissful that it hurts.

“you crying for me, baby? do i feel that good?” lando mocks, reinvigorated by the way your tears gather at your collarbone. his hand swipes messily against your throat, swiping them away, but you catch his hand, keeping it there. your eyes lock as your hand squeezes around his, a silent plea. he rocks up into you even harder, hand clamping around you neck slowly, leaving your breathless, liquid heat shooting down your spine. you can’t stop it from hitting you like a ton of bricks, can’t hold back, not when he’s making it hurt so fucking good.

“lando, i can’t- i’m gonna- fuck.” you bellow, falling to pieces around him. he keeps you propped up through your orgasm, plowing into your limp body until you’re so tight around him that he quite literally can’t keep going. he shudders, repeating your name like a godforsaken prayer as his abs flex beneath your shaky hands. you feel him filling you up, shots of warmth painting your insides.

lando lets you collapse into his arms, holding you tight as you both tremble in the silence of the car. condensation rolls down the windows, giving away your frenzied desires. if anyone caught sight of his car, it wouldn’t be hard to do the math.

“gonna let me take you home so we can do that again?” lando laughs, breathing you in. he can feel the way your chest rumbles softly in response, hears your angelic, raspy laugh.

“gimme a sec, don’t think i can move ever again.” you groan, sighing into his chest.

you stay there for a while, basking in it, coming down. he traces shapes into the bare skin of your back; you absentmindedly trace a heart into the window fog.

when you finally manage to redress, it’s dark outside, bright lights casting patterns into the calm midnight of the marina. he holds your hand as he drives up into the heights of monaco, and you stare at the way yours fits so perfectly with his, just like how your head tucked so perfectly into the crook of his neck. you smile out the window and lando smiles at you.

by the time bedtime rolls around, you’re both well and truly exhausted. when you try and wriggle out of his grip, ready to retreat back to the guest room like a wounded animal, lando pouts - pouts! - and holds you even tighter.

“silly girl.” he kisses the words into your hairline, and drifts off to sleep.

-

hehe

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taglist

lemme know if you wanna be added or removed! any tags that don’t work will be removed xo

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taglist cont. in reblogs. smooches

[stxrkiss]

𝗒𝗈𝗎'𝗋𝖾⠀⠀𝗌𝗍𝗂𝗅𝗅⠀⠀··⠀⠀𝗯𝗹𝘂𝗲 !ㅤ☆

君が離れるなんて、考えられないよ…

# 𝑷𝑨𝑰𝑹𝑰𝑵𝑮 : 𝑌𝑎𝑛𝑑𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝒟𝒾𝒸𝓀 𝒢𝓇𝒶𝓎𝓈ℴ𝓃 𝑥 𝐹𝑒𝑚 𝑅𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑒𝑟 ☆ ᵖᵃʳᵗ ¹

# 𝑺𝒀𝑵𝑶𝑷𝑺𝑰𝑺 : 𝘐𝘵'𝘴 𝘸𝘳𝘰𝘯𝘨. 𝘎𝘰𝘥 𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘴𝘰 𝘸𝘳𝘰𝘯𝘨. 𝘏𝘦 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴. 𝘠𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘉𝘳𝘶𝘤𝘦'𝘴 𝘥𝘢𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘦𝘳. 𝘐𝘵'𝘴 𝘴𝘪𝘤𝘬. 𝘏𝘦'𝘴 𝘴𝘪𝘤𝘬. 𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘰 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶.

# 𝑾𝑨𝑹𝑵𝑰𝑵𝑮 : 𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘪𝘦𝘤𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘴 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘬 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘴, 𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘭𝘶𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘣𝘪𝘥𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦, 𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘱-𝘴𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘱, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘰𝘣𝘴𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯. 𝘙𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘵𝘳��𝘯𝘨𝘭𝘺 𝘢𝘥𝘷𝘪𝘴𝘦𝘥. 𝘐𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘶𝘯𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘴𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘴, 𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘥𝘰 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘤𝘦𝘦𝘥. 𝘔𝘪𝘯𝘰𝘳𝘴 𝘋𝘕𝘐 ⚠

# 𝑵𝑶𝑻𝑬𝑺 : 𝘌𝘯𝘨𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘩 𝘪𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘮𝘺 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵 𝘭𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘶𝘢𝘨𝘦.

Dick shouldn’t want you.

It’s wrong.

It’s not just the family thing—though, God, that alone should be enough to keep his hands off you—it’s the fact that you are Bruce’s daughter. The man who saved him. The man who raised him. The man who gave him everything when he had nothing.

And yet, here he is, watching you.

He doesn’t mean to. He swears he doesn’t. But you make it impossible not to look. Not when you walk around the manor in nothing but those tiny little shorts that barely cover anything, your shirt riding up to tease the barest hint of skin.

You do it on purpose. You must.

Because every time you catch him staring, you smile—all soft, all knowing—and it makes something dark coil in his gut.

He tells himself it’s just lust. Just temptation. That if he ignores it, it will go away.

But it doesn’t.

It gets worse. So much worse.

Because you’re cruel.

You push him. You tease him. You taunt him.

Like last week, when Bruce was out on League business, and it was just you and Dick alone in the manor. You had walked into the kitchen, wearing one of his old shirts—his—the hem just barely brushing your thighs. No shorts. No bra. Just you, all soft and warm and so fucking tempting, stretching in front of him with a lazy little smirk.

And the worst part? You acted innocent.

“Oh? Are you blushing, Dick?” Your voice had been sickly sweet, your eyes brimming with amusement as you sauntered past him, brushing against his side like it was nothing. “I didn’t know you were so easy to fluster.”

He had gritted his teeth and forced himself to look away, fingers curling into fists, nails digging into his palms.

Because if he didn’t—if he let himself slip, even for a second—he would do something unforgivable.

And you know it.

That’s the worst part.

You know exactly what you do to him. You know how hard it is for him to keep control.

And you love it.

You push and push and push, testing him, daring him to snap.

And God help him, he’s so close.

The first time Bruce brought Dick home, you were not happy.

You were young—only about a year younger than him—but old enough to know what this meant.

Your father, your Batman, was bringing home another child.

A boy.

A boy who had just lost everything.

A boy who would now be living in your home, sitting at your table, training with your father.

You had stood on the grand staircase, arms crossed, lips pressed together as Alfred guided the quiet, wide-eyed boy through the manor doors. He looked small, his blue eyes dull with grief, his shoulders hunched like he was trying to make himself invisible.

You should have felt bad for him.

You really should have.

But at the time, all you saw was a stranger stepping into your world.

Bruce placed a firm hand on his shoulder, his voice quiet but steady. “This is your home now, Richard.”

Richard.

You tested the name in your mind, turning it over, before your father turned his gaze to you.

“Go on,” Bruce said, nodding toward the boy. “Say hello.”

You didn’t want to.

But under your father’s stare, you sighed and reluctantly walked down the stairs.

Richard lifted his head, his blue eyes locking onto yours.

You were prepared for awkwardness, for silence, maybe even resentment from him.

But instead—

He smiled.

Small, tentative.

But real.

And for some reason, it made your heart stumble.

“Hey,” he said softly, his voice hoarse, uncertain. “I’m Richard.”

You looked at him for a long moment before finally muttering, “I know.”

His lips twitched, like he wanted to laugh. Like he already found you funny.

It was annoying.

And yet… something about it warmed you.

At first, you refused to accept him.

Dick was everywhere, slipping into places that had once been yours alone.

Bruce took him to train.

Bruce took him on patrol.

Bruce cared about him.

And it made something ugly coil in your chest.

You hated that you felt jealous, but you did.

Because before Dick, it had always been you and Bruce. Even if Bruce was distant, even if he was never the perfect father, he had still been yours.

You avoided him around the manor, shot down Alfred’s attempts to get you to play nice, and scoffed when Bruce started training him—giving him a place in your world, like it was nothing.

But Dick was… persistent.

He didn’t get mad when you ignored him. He didn’t complain when you rolled your eyes at his jokes.

If anything, he seemed amused.

And worse—he kept trying to be your friend.

He’d find you in the library and poke at your shoulder until you finally looked up.

“Whatcha reading?”

“Go away.”

“I don’t think I’ve read that one before. Is it good?”

“Are you deaf?”

“…Is that a yes?”

You’d glare at him. He’d just grin back.

You hated how unbothered he was.

But somehow, little by little, he wore you down.

The first time you truly laughed with him was late one night in the kitchen.

Alfred had already gone to bed, Bruce was off on patrol, and you had crept downstairs for a midnight snack.

And apparently, so had Dick.

You caught each other in the dimly lit kitchen, both freezing, staring at one another like two criminals caught in the act.

For a second, neither of you moved.

Then—

“I won’t tell if you won’t,” he whispered, a mischievous glint in his blue eyes.

You narrowed your gaze.

Then sighed. “Fine.”

That was the night you bonded over stolen cookies, whispered jokes, and laughter muffled behind your hands.

That was the night you realized something.

You liked having him around.

And maybe—just maybe—having a brother wouldn’t be so bad after all.

Then, little moments started to chip away at your walls.

One night, you had been training alone in the manor gym, taking out your frustration on a punching bag when you suddenly lost your balance and stumbled—falling hard against the mat.

You hissed, pressing a hand to your ankle, pain flaring up your leg.

And before you could even process it, he was there.

Dick had been watching from the doorway—silent, unnoticed—but now he was crouching beside you, concern clear in his blue eyes.

“Are you okay?” he asked, voice soft, careful.

You swallowed your pride and muttered, “I’m fine.”

He didn’t believe you.

Without a word, he reached out and gently took your ankle in his hands, his touch careful but firm as he checked for injuries.

You tensed. “I said I’m fine—”

“Just shut up for a second,” he said, rolling his eyes but still smiling.

You blinked.

It was the first time he had ever talked back to you.

And for some reason… it made your chest feel warm.

After a moment, he let go and leaned back on his heels. “It’s not swollen. You’ll live.”

You scowled. “Gee, thanks, doctor.”

He grinned, and you hated that you almost smiled back.

After that, things changed.

You found yourself talking to him more, sitting next to him at meals, even training together in the gym.

And it wasn’t awful.

He made things easier.

He made you laugh.

And for the first time in a long time… you didn’t feel so alone.

Then your birthday came.

You didn’t expect much. You never did.

Bruce had never been the type to make a big deal out of birthdays.

He’d get you something practical—a new weapon, an upgrade to your suit, maybe a rare book you mentioned once in passing.

Alfred would bake a cake, wish you a proper happy birthday, and that would be it.

But that year… something was different.

You woke up to balloons tied to your chair at breakfast.

A handmade banner hanging in the dining room.

And a small, neatly wrapped box placed in front of your plate.

You stared at it, then turned to Alfred.

He just smiled knowingly and nodded toward Dick.

You blinked, finally looking at him.

Dick was watching you nervously, his fingers tapping the table like he was waiting for your reaction.

“I, uh… I know you don’t really do birthdays,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck, “but I figured, you know… maybe this year could be different.”

Your chest felt tight.

Slowly, carefully, you reached for the box and unwrapped it.

Inside was a bracelet—simple, black, woven with thin silver threads. Hand-braided. Slightly uneven.

You lifted it, your throat suddenly dry. “You made this?”

He nodded quickly. “Yeah. It’s, um… kinda stupid, but I wanted to make you something instead of just buying something.”

You didn’t know what to say.

No one had ever done something like this for you before.

Your fingers curled around the bracelet, and for the first time, your voice softened.

“…Thank you.”

Dick’s entire face lit up.

And for the first time since he arrived at the manor, you realized something terrifying.

You didn’t just like him.

You needed him.

© stxrkiss ☆ don't copy, translate or use my works here or any other websites.

[robertsfloyd]

can you write something about owners Lando and Oscar with a puppy reader who is very clingy and needy

I've been writing some personal stuff!! I got back into writing high fantasy concepts with @ride-em-cowboy and I'm literally obsessed!!

"Angel," oscar whispered as he placed his finger under your chin and tipped your head up.

Your tail hit his leg as you looked at him, a whimper leaving your lips. You knew that tone, knew what it meant.

They were leaving soon.

You buried your head against his chest again, another whimper leaving his lips. "Hey, hey, hey," he mumbled. "C'mon, Puppy. Don't do that."

Be a good girl for me.

He didn't need to say it, but you knew it was coming. You looks up at him, a pout on your face as you stared into his eyes. He moved his thumb over your cheekbone as he looked at you. "You know what I'm gonna say. "

You nodded your head.

"You-"

But Oscar cut you off before you could spit those words out, say what you always said when they left you. You don't love me. But they did love you. They moved you more than you could ever understand.

"C'mon, Pup. You know we'd take you with us if we could," he mumbled and you nodded your head. "If we didn't love you, you wouldn't be here, would you?"

Oscar was always the logical one, always the one to make sure you had your head screwed on straight before you freaked out, started whining and crying and barking for them.

"Why can't I come with you?" You asked as you wrapped your arms around him, chin on his chest.

He gently petted your head. "You don't like flying, Angel."

Oh, that was right. You hated flying, spent the short journeys from France to other European countries with your head buried against his and landos chests.

"Still," you whispered, blinking back tears.

The front door opened and you scrambled off of his lap.

In a matter of seconds, your arms and legs were wrapped around landos leg, stopping him from moving. "You can't leave me!" You cried as you sniffled, ears buried beneath your hair.

Lando looked around, a little lost. He looked down at you and moved his hand to pet your hair. "Hey, Puppy," he said softly as he looked down at you. "What're you doing?"

You tightened your grip on him. "You can't leave me."

"Who said anything about leaving you, baby?" He mumbled as he pulled you to your feet.

"Oscar."

Oscar had actually said the opposite.

Lando raised his eyebrows, looking like he didn't believe you. A grin split across his face as he pulled you against him and kissed your forehead. "Oh, my darling, my baby," he mumbled.

You looked up at him, blinked and whimpered, and he kissed you.

"You like the dog sitter, remember angel?"

You didn't need a dog sitter, didn't need somebody to look after you. As much as you liked being pampered, you could take care of yourself.

But not according to the law. According to the law, you couldn't be on your own for more than a few hours. According to the law you were incapable of leaving the house on your own.

"We'll call you every night, okay?" He asked as he walked you forward, walked you back to the couch where Oscar sat. "We'll check in on you whenever we can."

Oscar reached for you and pulled you into his lap. He leaned up, kissed lando quickly, and laid his chin on top of your head. "We're gonna miss you as much as you miss us, Sweetheart," he said and kissed the top of your head.

"Gonna miss everything about you." Lando laid his hands on your thighs, not covered up by your shorts.

Oscar squeezed your hips. "Gonna make the most of the time we got before the race."

"You want that, Angel? You want Oscar and I to make you feel good?"

Your only response was a whimper.

[suzdin]

Home Is Wherever I’m With You

Joel Miller x f!reader

Summary: After the tragic loss of your father and home, you find yourself at the mercy of a cold, detached stranger who holds your fate in his hands during a violent snowstorm.

Notes: okay fair warning, I started writing this when I was feeling extremely low, and finished it several weeks later when I was doing better, so if it seems disjointed and sloppily thrown together, that’s why! But I swear there’s a happy ending!

Warnings: ANGST!!! I cannot stress the amount of angst. Suicidal thoughts and ideation, especially at the beginning. Alcohol consumption. Main character deaths; all of them. Lots of depression and poor mental health, mostly with Joel. Angsty!Joel, asshole!Joel, soft!Joel, semi-dom!Joel, protective!Joel, masturbation (m), oral (f receiving), face riding, unprotected p in v, creampie, biting/marking, pregnancy heavily hinted at, more angst

Word Count: 7,100+

dividers provided by: @saradika-graphics ❣️

Tags: @ohheypedrito @kateispunk @kellybelly1978 @berryispunk @chronically-ghosted @morallyinept @natdeandar @guelyury @daddy-dins-girl

Joel crouches in front of the old cast iron stove, his knees groaning in protest as he stokes the embers within using an extra scrap of wood.

He doesn’t know why he’s going through the trouble. It isn’t like he’ll be around much longer. Maybe he just wants to feel warmth one last time before he does it. And this time, he won’t miss.

He’ll be cold soon enough anyway.

He gets the fire breathing again, closing the hatch and settling back into the old leather recliner in the corner, worn and cracking with age, much like himself.

He palms the neck on a bottle of bourbon, taking a hefty swig and wiping his lips with the back of his hand, his face crinkling in rumination as he watches the flames dance behind slats of iron.

Sarah. Tess. Tommy. And then Ellie. He had failed each and every one of them; those he claimed to love, who he vowed to keep safe. He had let them down. He had let himself down.

He takes another pull on the bottle and sets it down heavily on the table next to him, replacing it with his Smith & Wesson, heavy digits curling around the grip.

He traces the scar on his temple with the point of his index finger, feeling the faint indentation in the flesh; a constant reminder of yet another failure.

He lowers his hand back to the revolver, finger circling the trigger guard, dark eyes downcast as he attempts to summon the strength to do what he needs to do. Again.

His hand tremors as he lifts the gun and presses the cold barrel to his temple, thumb cocking the hammer back with a hollow metallic clunk that resonates through his skull and soul.

“C’mon, Joel. Get yourself fucking together for once.”

His eyes close, nose scrunched in a deep scowl.

Just do it, Joel. Pull the fucking trigger.

The ball of his index finger curves around the bend of the trigger, twitching with indecision when the back door to the cabin abruptly flies open, temporarily snapping him out of his psychosis.

It’s just the wind. That’s all it is. A gust of wind from the incoming snowstorm.

He doesn’t move from his space on the recliner. The cold won’t matter in a few seconds anyway. He lifts the barrel to his temple again, aligning it just right…

The back door clicks shut. It wasn’t slammed, like the wind would have done had it been the culprit. It very audibly clicked. Like someone or something shut it themselves.

Immediately following the click, he hears the unmistakable scrape of boots on wood, the revolver lowering from offensive to defensive position.

No sooner do you get the door closed that you notice a faint flicker of light from the adjoining room, your heart beginning to thrum like a jackhammer in your chest. From the outside, in your weary state, the dilapidated old cabin looked abandoned as far as you could tell, realizing too late that it isn’t.

But now you’ve stumbled into someone’s den, and they could very well be armed and aiming to shoot. They could even be cannibals for all you know.

You could leave. You could just leave and pretend this never happened. But you haven’t seen any other shelters for miles… and the storm was only going to get worse.

“Who’s there?” a gruff male voice calls out from the other room, breaking through the stifling silence. You go stock still on instinct, your hackles bristled along your spine.

When you’re able to gather your bearings, you respond with your name, your vocal cords numb and strained from the cold.

“I mean no harm. I just need a place to sleep out of the storm. I promise to leave at first light,” you quickly add.

Joel stiffens when he hears a woman’s voice, his finger still circling the trigger guard as it had only moments before when the gun was trained on himself.

“Are you armed?”

“Just a small pistol and a jack knife. And I’m out of ammo,” you call back truthfully.

Everything is quiet for a moment aside from the crackle of flame and the howl of wind that rattles the windows and bends the outer wood. The silence between you and the unseen man feels like it stretches on for ages.

“Approach the door with your hands raised. An’ when I say, slide the gun and knife over to me.”

“Alright,” you reply quietly, approaching the ajar door in front of you, hands already skyward, kicking the door the rest of the way open with the toe of your boot.

You step forward two paces into the room, the scent of alcohol stinging your nostrils, your gaze settling on a haggard looking man in the furthest corner from you. His hair is wild and askew, eyes sunken in like a corpse, recognizing the hopeless glint behind them; no doubt a reflection of your own. A large pistol is clutched in his meaty fist, cocked and aimed.

“Gun first. Then the knife,” Joel says, his brow angled downward in a dark line, shading the even darker set of eyes.

You keep one hand in the air as the other reaches into the band of your jeans, removing the pistol and sliding it to him, stilling as it hits his boot.

He picks it up, discharging the clip to find that it is indeed empty, as you had claimed. He sets it next to the bourbon.

You slide the knife next, an average, run of the mill jack knife with a four inch blade. He inspects it, noticing a few remnants of blood still tarnishing the steel.

“Who’d you kill with this?”

“I used it to skin hares and squirrels.”

His face pinches with confusion, tilting his head at you like a dog hearing an unknown sound for the first time.

“Y’skinned hares and squirrels with a jack knife?” he questions doubtfully.

“It’s all I had,” you explain.

Joel eyes you warily. You’re definitely not dressed or equipped for this kind of weather. The only thing that seems to be keeping you warm is a thin hoodie, a regular set of jeans, and a pair of boots soaked through with snow.

He sighs. He isn’t going to kill himself with you here. He may not be the nicest or most caring man in the world, but he isn’t about to traumatize you. He’ll wait until you leave. You said you’d leave at first light.

In the meantime, he has to deal with someone being in his space, which he doesn’t exactly want to do, especially in his last hours. But he isn’t about sending you to your death, either. You probably have more to live for than he does.

“Here,” he says, kicking an old wicker chair toward you. “Your feet’re soaked. Take off your boots and warm your feet ‘fore you get frostbite.”

You lower your arms and take a cautious step forward, and then another, slowly sinking into the flimsy and rotten chair, bending to unlace and remove your boots.

You try to wiggle your toes but they won’t move, at least not yet. Joel watches with a scrutinizing glare, his hand still on the Smith & Wesson in his lap.

“What’s your name?” you ask him, pushing your boots aside.

“Ain’t important.”

You cast him a look but don’t press, scooting your sore and frozen feet closer to the stove, feeling yourself starting to slowly defrost.

You thank him for letting you stay.

He ignores your gratitude, dark browns drifting over your frame.

“Where’d you come from?” he asks.

“Ain’t important,” you counter, casting him another glance.

He leans forward, planting his elbows on his knees, pinning you with a deep scowl.

“I’m the one with the gun,” he chides in a deep timbre, his tone brooking no room for protest. “Guns,” he quickly amends.

Your eyes lock with his momentarily, assessing his conviction before deciding not to test it.

“A settlement near Billings.”

“Alone?”

“Yes.”

He leans back, his gaze unmoving, letting out a breath through his nose.

“An’ exactly what prompted you to run out into a snowstorm with just a hoodie and no supplies?” he asks.

You flinch as if he’d just backhanded you, averting your gaze. If you were looking, you might notice his face softening, if only just a hair.

“Raiders came into our settlement. My father… he gave me the pistol and distracted them while I snuck under a gap in the fence. I didn’t have time to grab anything else,” you tell him.

“And your dad?” Joel asks delicately.

“Didn’t make it out,” you reply grimly, your body beginning to tremor, a combination of repressed emotion and your muscles beginning to thaw.

Joel falls silent, absorbing your words as truth. He can’t find a reason that you would lie about something like that.

“I’m sorry,” he sympathizes, his voice gentling.

You bring your knees to your chest, your chin resting between them, arms wrapped around your shins.

“Thank you,” you say again, your voice hardly above a whisper.

——

Your eyes snap open, realizing you must have drifted off at some point, finding yourself curled into a fetal position directly in front of the dying fire.

A blanket you’re sure wasn’t there before is wrapped around your frame. You’ve no idea where it came from, it’s a bit scratchy and smells funky, but what matters is it’s warm, subconsciously pulling it tighter around your shoulders when you feel a chilled breeze brush over you through the cracks in the wall.

“Mornin’,” Joel hums softly above you.

“Morning,” you echo, shifting as your eyes scan the room, the cabin just as dark and cloaked in shadow as when you arrived. You’re unsure how he knows what time of day it is, but you decide not to question it.

He’s in almost the exact position in the old recliner as the previous evening, his hand unmoving from the revolver still in his lap. You can’t help but wonder if he had any rest at all, not sure if him watching you sleep should be comforting or disconcerting.

You sit up with a stretch, your joints crackling like twigs as you work out the aches of not only having traveled this far on foot, but also sleeping on a hard wooden floor all night.

Better than freezing to death, you decide.

You scoot until your back is flush with the wall, leaning against it as you silently study Joel.

“Thank you for the blanket—“ you begin, but he quickly cuts you off with a hard glare, nudging your dried out boots to you with his foot.

“Boots’re dry. It’s morning. ‘bout time for you to leave,” he says, his voice low and rough.

It dawns on you that it’s still dark because the storm hasn’t lessened at all, banks of snow clogging the windows and doors, blocking out what little available sunlight there is.

Your brow knits together and you cast him a wary glance, bottom lip trembling.

“But it… it’s…”

“The deal was first light, darlin’, and I’ve given you plenty more than that.”

“Please… just… a few more hours? Until the storm dies down some?” you plead, tears pricking at the backs of your eyes, preemptively threatening to freeze your eyelids together.

He’s silent and contemplative for what you feel is longer than necessary, a muscle fluttering in his jaw.

He knows he should send you away, even if it means a certain death. He can’t have you here, swimming in his grief, prolonging the inevitable.

The other option, of course, is to shoot you and then himself, a swift and merciful death that you deserve far more than he does. His fist tightens around the butt of the revolver, an action that does not go unnoticed by you.

“No,” he says plainly.

“Please, I’ll do anything,” you say, your voice cracking with emotion and desperation, shifting to your knees as you shuffle a few inches closer to his chair. He did give you a blanket, so there is a human being in there somewhere. “I can’t—“

“I can barely take care of myself, much less another person. Ain’t nothing you can offer me, nothing to barter with—“

“I’ll let you keep my gun and knife. Please. Just a few more hours…”

His jaw ticks again. Your odds are already low as is, but liberating you of your only means of defense, your only means of perhaps obtaining a meal, if only a meager squirrel or hare, would completely diminish any shred of a chance you have left.

He could give you his one and only jacket. Not that he’s going to need it after you leave, anyway.

“No,” he says again, more sternly than before.

His gaze is unmoving from yours, the slow, steady circling of his pointer finger on the edge of the trigger guard doing little to settle your nerves, the conflict apparent behind his dark eyes.

You know you don’t have much to offer. You’re not great at hunting. You’d exhausted your entire clip on what barely qualifies as a meal, leaving you with very little sustenance once the bullet had almost completely obliterated any viable meat.

You can’t fight or shoot worth a damn, either. Your father had tried to teach you in vain, his frustration with you growing to a fever pitch over the years, but it had never been your forte.

Because you never thought you’d have to live without him.

You can scout. Gather. Keep the cabin up, replace rotting boards and rusting nails, keep it clean and tidy. But not in this weather, and not for a few months yet.

So you default to the last thing you know how to do well. The only thing you know without a shadow of a doubt you’re good at, if any of the men at your settlement had anything to say about it before they perished.

You inch closer, your tired knees scraping against the dirty, splintered wood, hands trembling as you hesitantly reach toward his parted knees.

He anticipates more begging and pleading. Maybe a sob story or two.

What he doesn’t expect is for your hands to grab his belt, the meat of your palm ghosting over his crotch as you fumble to undo the worn rungs of leather.

His cock twitches instinctively and he can’t recall the last time a woman touched him like this. Made him feel anything but dead inside.

He moves with a sudden swiftness that surprises and startles both of you, the hand not currently on the revolver grabbing hold of your wrist like a striking serpent, his grip biting into your delicate bones so roughly you realize how effortless it would be for him to snap your wrist, should he feel so inclined.

He rises to his feet, dragging you with him and giving you a hard, reprimanding shake, teeth bared inches from your face.

It occurs to you seeing him fully upright like this just how tall, how imposing he is; worn, threadbare flannel stretched to its limits across broad shoulders and thick biceps.

“Christ, woman, the hell is wrong with you? What kind of man do you take me for?” he growls, a subtle twang piping up in his voice, his clenched fist releasing your wrist with a minor shove. You stumble backwards, catching yourself on the wall.

His nostrils flare, drawing in a deep, steadying breath, his eyes slipping shut as he tempers his simmering anger… and something else he doesn’t want to acknowledge.

“Fuck,” he grunts, eyes slowly opening again, rough digits carding through his graying curls. “If it means that much to you… you stay until the snow stops, an’ not a second later,” he nearly spits in your face. “Got it?”

When you easily nod in agreement, he stalks out of the room with a huff, every heavy footfall vibrating beneath your feet, slamming the door shut between you, leaving you standing there in the middle of the room, alone and unsure what to feel.

—

Joel goes into the now defunct bathroom, the traditional porcelain toilet that was maybe brand new decades ago currently unusable, the water in the tank and plumbing frozen solid, the pipes under the earth most likely cracked and warped.

He drops trow and leans forward with the flat of one palm against the wall, the other hand gripping himself.

He lets out a shaky breath he wasn’t aware he had been holding in, pissing into the cistern he had dug under the cabin two summers ago, a task only made more difficult by the partial erection he now has thanks to your — albeit brief — touch a few moments ago.

“Fuck, Joel,” he sighs as he empties his bladder, his cock only growing stiffer in his hand as he imagines how good your lips would have felt wrapped around him, what kind of pretty sounds you would have made for him.

“Fuck,” he grits again, cramming his painfully hard erection into his jeans when he’s done.

—

Hours turn to days, days to weeks, weeks to months — “until the snow melts an’ not a day later” — spring not far around the corner, the sun growing brighter and hotter in the sky with each passing day.

Joel’s suicidal ideations were still an ever present plague on his brain, though he kept that part of himself tucked neatly away, as he did most things that were personal and private. He never spoke of Sarah, Ellie, anyone. Never talked about his life before Outbreak.

In turn, you never talked about yours either, aside from what you’d told him the first night, too frightened that you might scare him away simply by opening up, by trying to stitch together what little relationship you had with one another.

The more time you spent with him, the more of a burden you began to feel. It didn’t matter how much you helped out, even if you kept a respectful distance between you, especially when he seemed extra bristly or in his head that day. He was always skulking about, his face pinched in indignation in what you were certain was unspoken hatred for you and your existence.

It was early morning and you were at the edge of the valley, the spot near the treeline that was choked with underbrush, gathering pathetically small handfuls of wild strawberries and huckleberries that were just beginning to fruit. Definitely not enough to have much impact on your aching bellies, but it could be supplemental to whatever protein Joel could scrounge up, which hadn’t been much as of late.

You wipe a fresh layer of sweat from your brow despite the air still being bitterly cold, collecting what meager pittance of berries you can, sucking in a breath of air as you steeled your nerves to head back to the cabin.

—

Joel’s door is still closed when you return. Not surprising, considering how early you’d gotten up that morning, Joel likely still exhausted and aching from the ineffectual hunting trip the previous day.

You place the berries into a bowl on the counter, your fingers curling into the peeling linoleum as you stare out the window that overlooks the southern end of the valley, sun cresting through the twisted and gnarled branches of still-bare trees.

You’ve been milling around the idea of leaving for weeks now. You’ve come close to doing so several times, knowing it would make Joel happy to not have you on his mind or in his space anymore.

Your hand hovers near the hunting rifle slanted against the wall, ultimately deciding against it as you tuck your pistol and knife into your pants, tossing half of the berries into a bag and shrugging on the jacket Joel had found for you on a hunting trip.

You take a final glance at his door before sucking in another sharp breath, opening and closing the back door for what you assume to be the last time.

—

Joel hears you return only to leave again a few minutes later. He thinks little of it, something you do frequently throughout the day when foraging or inspecting snares.

He wishes he could express his gratitude to you, thank you for how much you help out. How much you’ve improved his life just by being here. It kills him to see how you shrink away every time he enters the room, but he understands why. He hasn’t given you a reason not to.

Once he’s sure you’re out of earshot, he resumes pumping himself, hips bucking into his fist seconds before spurting hot ribbons of come onto his lower abdomen, eyes rolling back in his skull, your name a curse on his tongue as he imagines your mouth working him over in place of his fist.

As much as he’s wanted to touch you, sink himself into you every night, he’s been too afraid. Afraid to even speak to you, afraid of becoming attached only to lose you, like he’s lost all the others.

—

When you don’t return by mid day, he begins to worry.

He tries not to. He tries to tell himself maybe you decided to forage a little longer than usual, or maybe you’re at the river searching for freshwater clams since the weather is slowly beginning to warm.

Still, he can’t shake the feeling that something is off. That something is wrong.

He finds the bowl of fresh berries on the counter, evident that you had been foraging at least part of the day. But it didn’t feel right. It wasn’t good enough for him.

When you don’t return by nightfall, he knows without a shadow of a doubt that something is wrong.

This isn’t you.

—

Two days pass and you realize just how badly you fucked up.

The berries barely made a dent in your hunger and the only other food you managed to find were a few wild mushrooms that you’re pretty sure weren’t the edible kind, if the half gallon of resulting vomit an hour later was any sort of indication.

You fucked up. You fucked up royally and you miss the cabin. You miss the warm stove and the bed Joel made for you close to the fire. You miss how he always kept you fed and protected, even if you’re certain he hates you.

You miss Joel. You miss his grunts, you miss the way his face pinches when he glowers. You miss what he looks like when he chews, almost like he’s angry at his food somehow. You miss his smell when he comes home covered in grime and sweat from a full day of hunting.

Dusk has fallen on your second day without food or water, your bones feeling like powder and your muscles like jelly. You’re exhausted, head pounding with a combination of fatigue and hunger as you take shelter from the wind in a small outcropping of rocks, wishing he was here with you.

You’ll go back tomorrow, you decide.

—

Joel watches the sun sink behind the horizon of trees, cloaking the surrounding forest in near darkness.

He knows he should stop to rest for the night. Like you, he left in a rush without grabbing much in way of supplies or sustenance, but had been lucky to graze a buck that he was passively tracking while searching for you. He’ll likely find it soon.

He periodically came across fresh deer imprints in the earth, clean tracks slowly changing to drag marks, indicating the buck was either dead or close to death.

But you were constantly at the forefront of his mind. You were his focus. His reason to keep going. His reason for continuing to live.

And when he finds a perfect indentation of your left boot moments before the sun lowers completely from the sky, he knows he can’t afford to stop now.

—

It’s still dark when you wake up, your eyes coming into focus along the faint edges of what you can see, which isn’t much. Some rocks. Some trees.

You shift, rolling to your opposite side to go back to sleep, tucking your hands under your cheek as a makeshift pillow. A breeze blows over you, made stronger by the funnel of rocks, and you shiver, pulling your jacket tighter.

Snap.

Your eyes fly open again, immediately jumping to your haunches as you palm the pistol next to you.

You train your ears toward the source of the sound, somewhere in the trees, listening intently, your mind on shuffle with all the possibilities of what it could be.

It didn’t sound large enough to be a bear. A puma, perhaps, one who didn’t seem to be hunting you, hopefully, due to how loud the sound was.

Infected? A slim possibility. Rare up here, but not unheard of, which left you with the most likely option: it was human.

You attempt to still your breath, your fist white knuckled around the butt of the gun. It’s too dark to see anything, and all you hear is the soft whistle of the wind.

—

Joel registers the sound of you shifting from somewhere up the incline above him, limbs turning to stone as his mind cycles through all the same scenarios as you.

He lost your tracks halfway through the night, finding himself going in circles, so it’s quite possible it’s not you he’s just stumbled upon.

He slowly removes the rifle from his shoulder, lifting it to half mast in case whomever he’s stumbled across is hostile… or infected.

“I’m armed!” he calls out, lifting the rifle to a defensive position with the butt pressed to his shoulder. “I have no beef with you if you have none with me,” he adds.

You swear your heart stops, tears suddenly stinging your eyes with salt.

“J-Joel?” you whimper, almost imperceptible, but it’s just loud enough.

Joel can only react, unthinking, responding on muscle memory alone as he somehow manages to traverse the steep, rocky incline in seconds without eating it.

You jump upright to your feet, despite how weak you are, and before your brain even has a chance to tell your legs to move, you’re struck by a wall of muscle, thick arms coiling around you and pulling you against his chest.

“Thank god, thank god,” Joel sobs into your hair as he drags you down to the ground with him, his voice softer than you can ever remember, the wetness of his tears soaking through your shirt. “I thought I’d lost you…” he whispers, his voice wavering.

He inhales your scent deeply, his hold on you nearly painful, but you don’t mind, your face against his chest as your own tears start to fall.

—

“I’m sorry,” Joel murmurs softly as you’re walking back the following day, glancing over at you, dark brown eyes gently regarding your side profile in the early morning light. “I’m sorry I made you feel like I don’t care. I just…”

“I know,” you respond, pausing to collect your breath and your thoughts. “I know why you did it. I’m sorry I doubted you. I’m sorry I scared you…”

“Hey,” he says, gently cupping your jaw as he tilts your chin up to meet his gaze, calloused thumb tracing your jawbone, pausing at your bottom lip. “S’okay.”

Your lips pucker, impervious to stop yourself from planting a small kiss to the pad of his thumb as it brushes your lip.

He lets out a low breath, his hand snaking around to the nape of your neck, fingers lacing through your hair as he tugs you closer, lips crashing against yours in a passionate, heated kiss that flows trembling from him with every fiber of withheld emotion and desire.

—

You arrive at the cabin half a day later, impressed but not surprised by how swiftly Joel was able to navigate both of you back safely.

He even successfully locates the downed buck, stiff with rigor mortis and cold, half chewed by a pack of wolves that scatter with a single rifle shot fired over their heads, the large animal now dragging listlessly behind Joel as you finally break through the barrier of trees encasing the valley where the cabin resides.

Smoke still curls from the chimney, fire long gone but embers undoubtedly still hot, and you find yourself smiling. With relief, with anticipation.

You’re exhausted, famished and dirty. Yet you still assist Joel in stringing up what’s left of the buck to the outside of the cabin until he can properly butcher it, feeling obligated to do so after everything that’s happened, despite his protests.

Once the task is complete, you retire to the warmth and comfort of the cabin, curled against his chest, feeling at home for the first time in months.

His fingers idly trace the bow of your spine, both of you falling into a fast sleep for what feels like days on end.

—

“I was so goddamn stupid,” Joel growls softly as his lips chart a path down your soft inner thighs, finding himself grinding his hips into the mattress for relief. “So goddamn stupid an’ bullheaded, an’ I almost lost you for it.”

Your spine arcs instinctually when his breath ghosts tauntingly close to your soaked folds, your fists finding his graying locks with a tug.

“Joel, stop talking and make it up to me,” you whine, earning a disapproving glance from between your legs, but there’s an undercurrent of playfulness behind his eyes.

“Make it up to you, huh?” he purrs, separating your folds and inhaling your natural scent. “By tastin’ this perfect little pussy?”

“Yes,” you whine again, writhing like a worm cooking under the sun in his grasp, your fingers tightening in his hair.

“Uh uh,” he scolds, moving further away from where you’re desperate for him. “Ask nicely.”

His lip curves almost imperceptibly into a sly smirk, his gaze growing a shade darker.

“Please, Joel,” you amend, still wiggling, almost involuntary at this point, his fingers digging into your hips as he pins you against the bed.

“Please what?”

“Please, I need to feel your mouth on my pussy,” you whimper.

His nostrils flare, smirk growing just enough for you to realize you weren’t just seeing things.

He doesn’t waste another second as he dives in with a low, reverberative growl and begins feasting on you like a man starved, his meaty forearm barred across your hip to hold you in place so he can eat you out properly.

His tongue parts your folds, licking a broad stripe up your seam with a groan as he tastes your essence for the first time, moving back down to your opening to tongue fuck you, the ridge of his nose grinding deliciously against your throbbing clit.

You tug harder against his strands with a moan, helping to guide him where you need him most.

Joel grunts your name into your core, eyes locking with yours over your mound, and it takes everything in you not to fall apart right then and there.

He abruptly pulls his mouth from you, making you whine in protest, another smirk notching the corner of his lips as he rolls onto his back, rigid cock swaying slightly with the motion of his hips.

“Get on my face, baby, I need to get deeper,” he says, grabbing your wrist and gesturing you closer.

You don’t even have to give it another thought, scrambling over him, folded knees planted on either side of his head.

He yanks you down abruptly to his waiting and eager mouth before you’re halfway settled, tongue curling into your wet heat with a deep groan that vibrates straight through you.

His fingers dig into the meat of your ass, directing your movements, grinding you against his face as he continues to feast on you like you’re nothing less of a five star meal.

Your hands furl the edge of the headboard, spine arching, and it doesn’t take much longer in this position to be sent over the edge, your orgasm ripping through you like a bolt of lightning, Joel’s name a sacred prayer on your tongue as everything inside of you completely uncoils.

He keeps you there long enough to let you ride out your high, tongue still laving at your spasming walls until it’s too much for you to handle.

You shift off of him, his facial hair glistening with evidence of your release as he pulls you down into a rough, needy kiss, letting you taste yourself, flipping you over and pinning you beneath him, arms caged around your head as he grinds his hardness against you.

“You have no idea how many times I jerked off thinking about you like this,” Joel confesses, nipping at your jaw, then your bottom lip. “How you would feel. How you would taste.” He kisses down to your collarbone, his teeth gently grazing.

“And you have no idea how many times I touched myself thinking about you,” you confess in reply, Joel’s head lifting to meet your eyes at your admission. “I had to bite my lip every night to keep from moaning your name...”

“Fuck…” he growls, settling his pelvis between your thighs, pushing your legs further apart, lifting one to prop against his shoulder.

“You make me feel things I haven’t felt in years,” he rumbles, giving himself a few firm pumps before notching himself at your entrance. “Y’want me to go fast or slow, darlin’?”

A warmth spreads through your chest at the simple act of him asking, knowing it isn’t just mindless sex to him, that he actually cares, if that wasn’t already obvious from how enthusiastically he just ate you out.

“Slow, then hard and fast,” you tell him, earning another deep rumble as he starts to push himself inside of you, fat head stretching your walls.

“Christ, you’re perfect,” he says softly as he steadily gains ground, his hips shuddering with restraint once he bottoms out, sheathing himself fully. “Fuck, darlin’, you’re strangling me,” he grunts. “I don’t know how long I can last...”

The pain of withholding in his voice is palpable.

“Joel, you just made me come super hard,” you tell him. “Don’t hold yourself back just for me.”

His bottom lip juts out and quivers with the thin veil of control he still has, fingertips digging into your hips, crescent moon shapes left behind in your skin.

“Y’sure?” he asks, internal conflict evident in his voice as he rolls his hips half a thrust forward. “‘cause soon as I start, I don’t think I’ll be able to hold back…”

“I’m sure,” you reassure him, letting him hear the conviction in your voice.

He takes in a steadying breath and gently gyrates his hips forward once, twice, his head tilting down to watch the way he disappears inside of you.

It must be the way you’re taking him so well — or maybe it’s the months of not allowing himself to touch you — the thin thread of restraint suddenly fraying after the initial soft, testing thrusts, a barely audible ‘fuck’ escaping his lips seconds before he begins railing into you with everything a man of his age has to give… which is a lot.

Joel’s hand is on your calf, holding your leg flush to his chest, the other on your hip in a bruising hold, watching the way your body sways in rhythm with his motions, teeth bared in concentration.

“Darlin’… I’m… I… where do you want it?” he pants, the question almost sounding pained.

You know you should make him pull out and finish on your stomach. Contraceptives are a rare luxury these days and you’d always made your previous boyfriends pull out. But you can’t stop yourself, the permission spilling from your lips thoughtlessly.

“In… inside…” you whimper in desperation and Joel doesn’t even think to question it.

He collapses on top of you, his hips sputtering and shaking, a deep, guttural snarl sounding from his chest as he spills into you, filling you to the brim with hot jets of spend.

Despite not coming a second time, the sensation of him shooting inside of you still feels good, his warmth filling every crevice it can reach inside of you.

He buries his face against your neck, gingerly taking some of your flesh between his teeth, biting down just hard enough to leave a faint impression.

His hips gradually slow and still, your name a reverent curse on his tongue.

“Christ,” he pants, wrapping you snugly in his burly arms. “Christ, darlin’.”

—

Spring finally reaches the valley, replenishing the land with color and sunlight, allowing you and Joel to wander out further and further every day.

He tells you he wants to find something nicer than the cabin. Somewhere larger, more permanent, even though you’ve told him time and again that you’d prefer to stay.

And you do, for a spell.

That is until you find your body growing more sensitive than usual. Until you find it increasingly difficult to keep some of your meals down, trying to convince Joel it’s nothing, that it’s just a summer cold, when you both know it’s not.

Joel dotes on you, burdens himself over you, knowing exactly what it is without wanting to say it. All the signs are there, almost textbook, unable to keep his memories from drifting back to the days before Sarah was born, how her mother’s symptoms were damn near identical.

He doesn’t dare tell you how scared he is, how much this terrifies him all the the way to his bone marrow, but you know. You see it in his gaze when he looks at you, feel it in his touch when he pulls you against him at night.

—

You’re on a scouting run one warm summer day, Joel hardly more than two feet from you at any given moment, so many unspoken words and feelings still hanging in the air between you.

He reaches for your arm to steady you when your feet slide on a patch of loose rocks, his palm instinctively moving to protect your stomach. You’re almost sure he wasn’t even aware he did it.

“Joel,” you say, placing your hand over his. “I’m alright.”

His brow furrows, silence speaking louder than any words he could say.

He’s reverted into his headspace again, more quiet these last few days than he has been. And it worries you. You hate that he bottles everything up, but you know that confrontation could make him shut down even more.

You begin walking again, his hand absently resting on the small of your back, and you continue down the path in stagnant silence.

Suddenly, Joel stops, eyes squinting to confirm what he’s seeing is real.

A neighborhood.

—

The neighborhood would have been considered a new development before the world went to shit, most of the lots bare and choked with two decades worth of weeds, some houses half built and some finished but likely vacant at the time.

There are only a few that look to have been potentially occupied before everything, three larger homes next to one another in a cul-de-sac at the end of unmanaged, cracked pavement.

There’s not much of interest in the first few homes you inspect, watching the way Joel silently scrutinizes everything as a potential future dwelling, not a single corner left unchecked, his latent instincts as a contractor still well ingrained in him despite the expanse of time.

By mid day, you’re both sweating profusely, Joel moreso than you since he isn’t letting you do much, forcing you to put food and water in your body, brooking no argument when he gives you his ration as well.

He knows you should head back soon before you’re out too late, but there’s still one house left to search and he doesn’t want to make the trip a second time if it isn’t worth the trouble.

The largest house, a two story spruce green craftsman with gray trim, his heart aching with nostalgia at how much it reminds him of his former home in Austin.

You start the same route as with the other houses; from the top, room by room, working your way down, your anxiety growing the lower the sun dips in the sky, knowing you only have a couple hours at best before it’s too late to leave.

The main floors scoured, you follow Joel to the basement, your hands on his shoulders for stability as you slowly work your way down the creaking stairs, your eyes adjusting to the shadows the deeper you travel.

When you’ve reached the bottom, Joel pulls out his flashlight, hitting it against his palm a few times before it flickers to life, the thin beam of light reflecting off the freshly disturbed dust.

You cover your nose and mouth with your shirt to keep out some of the flying particles, watching as Joel stumbles upon a stack of neatly piled and labeled storage totes in the furthest corner from the stairs, adrenaline beginning to course through him like a drug as he reads the faded sharpie scrawled on the sides.

“‘Canned goods and preserves’,” Joel says quietly, his voice higher in pitch than usual, more hopeful. There’s at least four totes labeled canned goods that you can see, possibly more, dates ranging from anywhere from late 2000 to summer of 2003.

He moves slightly to the right, his body tremoring as he examines the next set of totes.

Multiple totes labeled MREs, dated around the same range as the canned goods. He rips the top off of a few of them open to confirm that his eyes aren’t deceiving him, that this isn’t a cruel dream, nearly doubling over when he sees just how real it is.

“Joel?” you ask, concerned, stepping nearer to him when you see him trembling and clutching his chest. “Baby ..?”

He suddenly turns and throws his arms around you, and it dawns on you that he’s crying, he’s crying and trembling, eyes full of happy tears.

“A fucking prepper. A fucking prepper just saved our lives,” he whimpers into your hair, squeezing you against him, and all he can think in that moment is thank fuck for those crazy assholes. Thank fuck for people like Bill.

—

In the weeks that follow, you and Joel clean and repair the house — Joel doing most of the work, per his insistence — but it’s in surprisingly good shape despite its age and lack of upkeep, and even with just the two of you, it doesn’t take as long as you’d expected.

You can’t help but miss the cabin, the natural beauty of the valley. But Joel was right to move you. It’s safer here, more insulated from weather, more space to grow. And perhaps, one day, the cabin can be someone else’s salvation, as it had been for you.

Another night falls on one of the final lingering days of summer, barely able to see the shine of Joel’s eyes in the dim light as he climbs over you, parting your legs with his knee, rumbling low in his chest as he peppers kisses and bites down the column of your neck.

[literatureloverx]

Celebrating Valentine’s Day with BSD men

BSD men x reader, I did not use pronouns for the reader, but in some cases, it is subtly implied to be female, though not overtly so.

Fyodor Dostoevsky

He would gift you—very much in line with what Asagiri confirmed—an entire country. Be prepared to manage political affairs because you will be the president and owner of your favourite nation. Congratulations!

Expect a lavish candlelit dinner, accompanied by classical music and an exquisite orchestra.

You can also look forward to many other gifts—he is never one to hold back. Your shared bedroom will likely be filled with presents, each meticulously crafted and designed just for you. The sheer intricacy and depth of his knowledge about you will leave you breathless.

The night will conclude with a magnificent fireworks display.

You made the right choice by choosing to live in isolation with him, basking in the luxury he provides—not that your answer would have made a difference if you had said no.

Dazai Osamu

We all know that Dazai—the Dazai—is, unsurprisingly, utterly broke and survives off the money of his fellow ADA members, such as Atsushi and Kunikida. (We love a pest.🩵)

He isn’t the overtly romantic type, but that doesn’t mean his love is any less intense.

He will likely buy you a bouquet of roses with Kunikida’s money and give Atsushi his best puppy-dog eyes to help him get you a pair of matching rings.

But then comes the truly unexpected part—he takes you stargazing in the freezing cold, having put in all the effort to create a soft, cosy space for you both to lie on, complete with extra blankets and pillows.

And when it starts snowing? You are going home, of course—not that he didn’t account for this. He has another present waiting for you there—one he actually bought himself, which is precisely why he had no money left for anything else.

He is a pervert. That is all I am going to say.

Nakahara Chuuya

Another man with refined tastes and a big, considerate, loving heart for his darling. He would spend weeks—if not months—thinking about the perfect way to celebrate this day with you, determined to make it unforgettable.

Chuuya pays attention—he really does, because he cares that much. Though he is not the best with subtleties, he does his best to take mental notes on everything you like and dislike, everything you want and do not want.

So, expect gifts that are carefully chosen, each one making it clear just how much he notices about you.

The evening will likely begin with him presenting you with a luxuriously crafted dress from a high-end designer—one he specifically picked for you. He wants you to wear it because he is taking you somewhere special, and of course, you will, with the brightest smile on your face.

You will dine at an exclusive restaurant, sharing exquisite wine and food together.

And knowing Chuuya, he will not stop at just one gift. Throughout the night, he will keep surprising you, giving you something new every half hour—because spoiling you is just second nature to him.

Nikolai Gogol

Haha, you silly thing. You actually think Valentine’s Day is romantic? That ridiculous day where Homo sapiens willingly cage themselves—not even in their own perception of love, but in the artificial fantasy constructed by capitalism?

Just joking. If you find it romantic, then of course, he does too. Or at least, he pretends to. Watching your reactions to his “gifts” is far too entertaining. He might as well play along and turn this whole romance thing into one of his little games.

Expect the most outrageous surprises—perhaps he will take you on a helicopter ride, only to reveal that he has written I love you on the ground below… using meticulously arranged corpses. A heartfelt, handcrafted message just for you.

Or maybe he will gift you something else grotesque—something that reminds him of you or symbolises your love in his own twisted way.

Oh, and expect plenty of Valentine’s Day quizzes.

Akutagawa Ryuunosuke

Now, here is someone who has no idea what to do with himself on Valentine’s Day.

To him, it is pointless. Why should this day be any different from the others? And why are you looking at him like that? The expectation in your gaze makes him feel cornered.

But Akutagawa hates being behind on anything. So, despite thinking this whole thing is ridiculous (such a tsundere), he still makes an effort. He prepares something for you—a small but meaningful gift, something that proves he has thought about you, about this day, and has put effort into making you happy.

And once it is over, he lets out a relieved sigh.

Yet, later that night, when he recalls the joy on your face upon receiving his gift, he feels something warm and unfamiliar flicker inside him. He refuses to acknowledge it—but deep down, he knows.

[dksfml]

Love 119 [Part Four]

The Prequel

part of my paramedic!jungwon series. [part one][part two][part three]

pairing: jungwon x reader summary: the story of how you and jungwon met and fell in love at the most unexpected time and place. genre: countryside romance, strangers to lovers, slight angst, teasing, banter, and fluff (for the earlier parts: enemies at work, lovers at home. workplace romance, secret dating, suggestive, submissive jungwon) word count: 4.6k author's note: prequel to the paramedic jungwon series, but can be read first. shoutout to @tinycatharsis who gave me the idea to make a backstory for this series. i absolutely love writing this part, and all of it just makes sense. enjoy <3 playlist: pink skies - lany, every summertime - niki, orange flower - enhypen, mean it - lauv & lany.

The city had never felt like home.

It was where you spent years chasing deadlines, drowning in textbooks, and memorizing medical terms until they became second nature. It was where you learned to function on caffeine and minimal sleep, where your days blurred into a never-ending cycle of lectures, internships, and hospital rotations. It was where you succeeded but never truly lived.

So when graduation finally arrived, when you were handed that hard-earned diploma with your name written in elegant calligraphy, your first instinct wasn’t to celebrate. It was to escape.

You needed a pause before the next battle. The board exams loomed ahead, but for the first time in years, you had the freedom to breathe. And there was only one place that made sense—home.

Not the sleek apartment in the city. Not the sterile walls of a hospital. But the countryside, where your childhood memories lived.

Where the air smelled of fresh earth instead of smoke and gasoline. Where the horizon stretched endlessly, painted in hues of green and gold. Where the nights weren’t filled with sirens and car horns, but with the steady hum of crickets and the occasional bark of a distant dog.

It had been years since you’d last visited. Your relatives still lived there, cousins who once ran through the fields barefoot, now grown. You imagined their wide-eyed curiosity when they saw you again, the pride in their voices when they introduced you as the family’s doctor-to-be.

And so, with a suitcase packed and a heart yearning for something familiar, you left behind the city’s cold embrace and stepped onto a bus heading toward the place where it all began.

At that moment, you had no idea that this trip would change everything. That buried in the stillness of the countryside, amidst the swaying rice fields and the warmth of home, was a story waiting to unfold.

A story that began with a single glance across a field.

And a boy named Jungwon.

The bus ride stretched long and languid, the road unraveling before you in a winding path of asphalt and dust. The further you traveled, the more the city’s towering buildings shrank into the distance, replaced by rolling hills, scattered nipa huts, and endless fields bathed in the golden afternoon sun.

You leaned against the window, watching as the scenery shifted, the hum of the bus blending with the distant sounds of cicadas. There was something deeply nostalgic about it, how the trees bent with the wind, how farmers worked in synchronized rhythm, their straw hats bobbing as they harvested the rice that swayed like an ocean of gold.

It was a world untouched by the frantic pace of city life. Here, time stretched rather than sprinted, and people moved with purpose but without urgency.

It felt foreign now, yet painfully familiar.

As the bus pulled into the town’s small terminal, you took a deep breath. The air was thick with the scent of freshly harvested crops, warm earth, and a hint of smoke from a nearby food stall grilling skewers of meat. A few vendors called out to passing travelers, selling rice cakes wrapped in banana leaves, baskets of ripe mangoes, and homemade treats that reminded you of childhood afternoons spent sneaking bites before dinner.

Your cousin was already waiting for you.

“Y/N!” she called, waving excitedly from where she stood near a parked tricycle. Her face had changed over the years, the round cheeks of childhood now sharper, more mature. But her smile was the same. Bright, welcoming, and filled with the warmth of home.

You barely had time to react before she threw her arms around you, squeezing tight.

“It’s been so long! You look so—” She stepped back, giving you a once-over, eyes sparkling with mischief. “—so much like a city girl.”

You rolled your eyes, laughing. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”

She smirked. “You’re gonna hate the heat. And the bugs.”

You already knew she was right. But you weren’t here for comfort. You were here to escape.

The ride back to your family’s house was bumpy, the dirt road uneven beneath the tricycle’s wheels. But the sight of home, your grandmother’s old wooden house, the wide fields stretching into the horizon, the laughter of children playing barefoot in the grass, was enough to make your chest tighten with something indescribable.

You had spent your entire life chasing after something bigger. A career, success, a future that was meant to shine. But sitting there, feeling the wind whip through your hair as the tricycle sped past familiar places, you realized that maybe the small things had always been the most precious.

The first few days passed in a blur of warm reunions and endless storytelling. Your little cousins clung to you, peppering you with questions about the city. They asked if the buildings really touched the sky, if the cars never stopped moving, if it was true that the air smelled different.

You answered them with a smile, but deep down, you envied their simple wonder.

One afternoon, your uncle invited you to the fields. “Just to see,” he said, but the knowing glint in his eyes told you otherwise.

That’s how you found yourself knee-deep in the rice paddies, the sun beating down mercilessly, sweat trickling down your spine as you attempted—poorly—to mimic the careful, practiced movements of the farmers. The mud squelched beneath your feet, and every time an insect buzzed past, you flinched. Your cousins laughed at your misery, their own hands swift and efficient as they gathered the stalks.

And then, you slipped.

It was embarrassing, really. One moment, you were standing, trying your best to pretend you belonged there, and the next, you were on the ground, hands sinking into the thick mud.

Laughter erupted around you, loud and unfiltered. You groaned, about to push yourself up when a shadow fell over you.

A hand appeared in your line of vision, fingers calloused, palm open.

“Need some help, city girl?”

You looked up, squinting against the sunlight.

That was the first time you saw him.

Jungwon.

His dark hair was slightly damp from sweat, his skin slightly tanned from days under the sun. There was an ease in the way he stood, as if he had done this his whole life, and maybe he had. His white shirt was loose, the sleeves rolled up, revealing toned arms that spoke of quiet strength. But what struck you most wasn’t his appearance.

It was the way he looked at you.

Amused. Curious. And just a little bit smug.

You frowned, ignoring his hand as you pushed yourself up, only to stumble again. This time, his hands caught you before you could fall, steadying you with surprising gentleness.

“Careful,” he said, voice tinged with laughter. “This isn’t the city. No smooth pavements here.”

You scowled. “I noticed.”

His lips quirked upward, eyes filled with something unreadable. “Yeah,” he mused. “I bet you did.”

And just like that, the first spark was lit.

You just didn’t know it yet.

You were still trying to shake off the mud from your hands when Jungwon chuckled.

“You sure you don’t need help?” he teased, crossing his arms.

You shot him a glare, brushing your palms against your pants in frustration. “I’m fine.”

Jungwon’s lips twitched as if suppressing a laugh. “Right. Totally looks like it.”

Your cousins were still snickering in the background, whispering to each other like schoolchildren watching a drama unfold. You sent them a warning glance, but that only made them giggle harder.

“Are you always this clumsy, or is it just the countryside that makes you weak?” Jungwon continued, his tone light but undeniably amused.

You narrowed your eyes at him. “I don’t usually walk around in knee-deep mud, if that’s what you’re asking.”

“Figured as much.” His gaze flickered to your clothes—your crisp white shirt now smeared with dirt, your once-pristine sneakers barely visible under the layers of mud. His smirk deepened. “You don’t exactly blend in here, city girl.”

You bristled at the nickname. “I have a name, you know.”

“Yeah? What is it?”

You hesitated for a split second. You weren’t sure why, but a part of you didn’t want to tell him, not yet. So instead, you crossed your arms and lifted your chin. “Shouldn’t you introduce yourself first?”

Jungwon let out a short laugh, tilting his head. “Fair enough.” He extended his hand, though with all the mud, neither of you seemed eager to actually shake hands. “Jungwon.”

You nodded, pretending not to be impressed by his confidence. “I’ve seen you around.”

“Same,” he said, leaning slightly closer. “Hard not to notice when someone reacts to every little bug like they’re facing death itself.”

You gasped. “I do not!”

He raised an eyebrow. “Uh-huh. Tell that to the grasshopper that made you shriek earlier.”

Your cousins burst into laughter again, and you groaned, throwing your head back in exasperation. “Unbelievable.”

Jungwon only grinned, clearly enjoying this way too much. “Don’t worry, I’ll protect you from the big, scary insects.”

You rolled your eyes. “How noble of you.”

“I try.”

There was something infuriatingly charming about the way he spoke, his confidence laced with playfulness. You weren’t used to people talking to you like this, teasing, and completely unafraid to push your buttons. In the city, most people were either too polite or too intimidated by your background. But Jungwon? He wasn’t impressed.

And for some reason, that annoyed you.

“You work here?” you asked, trying to change the subject.

“For now,” he replied, kicking some loose dirt with the toe of his boot. “Helping out my family for the summer.”

You frowned. “You don’t usually live here?”

“Nope.” His expression didn’t change, but there was something unreadable in his tone. “I don’t stay in one place for long.”

That caught your attention. You studied him for a moment, trying to figure him out. He didn’t seem like someone who belonged in a quiet town like this. His sharp features, his composed demeanor there was a certain confidence about him, as if he had seen more of the world than this countryside could offer. He moved with an ease that felt practiced, as if he had long learned how to adapt to different places.

And yet, here he was.

“Don’t overthink it, city girl,” Jungwon said, snapping you out of your thoughts. “You’ll hurt your head.”

You scoffed. “What makes you think I’m overthinking?”

He simply shrugged, his eyes glinting. “Call it intuition.”

You opened your mouth to retort, but before you could, your uncle’s voice rang through the fields.

“Y/N! You done embarrassing yourself, or are you staying in the mud all day?”

Jungwon let out a low chuckle, and you sighed dramatically. “Great. My whole family’s against me now.”

Jungwon gave you one last teasing glance before turning to walk away. “Welcome to the countryside.”

As he disappeared into the fields, you couldn’t help but watch him for a moment longer than necessary. There was something about him, something you couldn’t quite put your finger on.

And somehow, you had the strange feeling that this wouldn’t be the last time he got on your nerves.

The following days followed a steady rhythm. Mornings were filled with the sounds of roosters crowing and the chatter of your relatives preparing for the day. Afternoons were slower, drenched in the golden warmth of the sun, where people found shade under the trees or cooled off with sweet, icy drinks. Evenings were lively, dinners filled with laughter, children running around barefoot, and the sky bursting with stars so bright they almost didn’t seem real.

And somewhere in between all that, is Jungwon.

You saw him more often than you expected.

At first, it was just in passing. Him walking by your cousin’s house to borrow tools, him unloading sacks of rice from a truck, him helping the elders repair fences or lifting baskets filled with freshly harvested crops. You told yourself it was just coincidence, but deep down, you were starting to notice him a little too much.

And unfortunately, he seemed to notice you too.

“You look miserable.”

You turned from where you were standing near the edge of the rice fields, arms crossed as you watched your cousins work. Jungwon stood beside you, hands in his pockets, eyes twinkling with amusement.

“I’m not miserable,” you huffed. “I’m observing.”

“Observing what?”

You hesitated. “Just… how they work.”

Jungwon smirked. “You’re waiting for another chance to embarrass yourself, aren’t you?”

You scowled. “That was one time.”

“And yet, unforgettable.”

You sighed dramatically. “Are you always this annoying?”

“Only when it’s fun.”

You shot him a glare, but he only grinned. There was something frustrating about how effortlessly he could get under your skin. He was never cruel, never outright mocking. But he had a way of teasing you that made you feel like you were constantly playing a game you didn’t realize you signed up for.

Still, you weren’t about to let him have the upper hand.

“So, what do you do?” you asked, tilting your head. “Besides making my life difficult.”

Jungwon raised an eyebrow. “You mean here?”

“I mean in general.”

He hummed, as if considering whether or not he wanted to answer. “A little bit of everything.”

You narrowed your eyes. “That’s vague.”

“Maybe I like being vague.”

You scoffed. “That’s not fair. You ask me all these questions about my life, but you barely give me anything about yours.”

Jungwon shrugged, his lips curling up in amusement. “Maybe I just enjoy hearing you talk.”

That caught you off guard. For a split second, your brain short-circuited, unsure of whether he was messing with you or if there was something else hidden in his words. You opened your mouth to fire back, but before you could, he reached out and flicked a strand of your hair.

“You’ve got straw in your hair,” he said, smirking as he walked away. “City girl.”

You stood there, watching his retreating figure, heart pounding in a way you weren’t sure you liked.

Despite your best efforts, your interactions with Jungwon only increased.

He seemed to have a knack for appearing wherever you were. If you helped prepare meals in the kitchen, he’d conveniently show up to grab a drink. If you sat outside with your cousins, he’d stroll past, making some comment that sparked a new round of teasing from your family. If you took a walk through the fields in the late afternoon, he’d somehow always be nearby, throwing a casual, “Getting used to the bugs yet?” your way.

And then, there were the quieter moments.

One evening, you found yourself sitting on the wooden steps of your cousin’s house, sipping on a cup of cold coconut juice. The air was cooler now, the scent of the day’s labor fading into the crispness of the night.

Jungwon sat down beside you without a word, stretching his legs out in front of him. He rolled the drink in his hands before taking a slow sip. For once, he wasn’t teasing you.

“You like it here?” he asked after a while, his voice quieter than usual.

You glanced at him. “Yeah. It’s peaceful.”

He exhaled through his nose, tilting his head up to the night sky. “Too peaceful.”

You frowned. “Too peaceful?”

Jungwon tapped his fingers against the side of his cup. “I don’t know. I guess I like a little… action.”

You gave him a skeptical look. “What, you want car chases and explosions in the middle of the rice fields?”

He let out a soft chuckle. “Not exactly. Just… something unpredictable. Something fast. Something that makes your heart race.”

Your brows furrowed as you studied him. He didn’t seem like someone who belonged in a place like this, but this was the first time he actually admitted it.

“You get bored here, don’t you?” you asked, watching for his reaction.

Jungwon leaned back on his elbows, gaze fixed on the sky. “Let’s just say… I’m not used to staying still.”

Something about the way he said it made you pause. You wanted to ask more, why he was here in the first place, what kind of life he usually lived, but you hesitated.

Instead, you swirled your drink in your hands. “Well, if it makes you feel any better, I think I prefer the quiet.”

Jungwon smirked, turning to you. “Yeah, I can tell. You like your little slow mornings, your countryside sunsets, your cozy little routines.”

You rolled your eyes. “Is that a bad thing?”

He shook his head. “Nah. Just… different.”

Silence settled between you for a moment, not exactly awkward, but filled with something unspoken.

Then, Jungwon nudged your knee with his. “But I bet even you wouldn’t mind a little excitement sometimes.”

You scoffed. “Excitement like what?”

He tilted his head, considering. “Something thrilling. Like running through the rain, chasing something you’re not supposed to have, breaking a rule or two.”

You raised an eyebrow. “Sounds illegal.”

Jungwon grinned. “Depends.”

You shook your head, amused. “You’re something else, Jungwon.”

“I try.”

And for the first time, sitting there under the starry sky, you started to wonder what exactly it was he was running toward, or running from.

The night stretched on in silence, but your mind was restless. Jungwon’s words lingered in the air, as if they held more weight than he let on.

You glanced at him, his face partially illuminated by the glow of the lantern hanging near the doorway. He was staring straight ahead, the usual playfulness in his eyes dimmed, replaced by something quieter.

“You know,” you started, swirling the last bits of your drink, “you never really talk about yourself.”

Jungwon smirked, though it didn’t reach his eyes this time. “I thought you liked mysteries.”

You huffed. “I like solving them.”

He let out a small chuckle, shaking his head. “Figures.”

A breeze rolled through, rustling the banana leaves nearby. You hugged your knees to your chest, trying to piece him together. He wasn’t from here, that much was obvious. He wasn’t like your cousins, who had spent their entire lives in the countryside. He moved differently, spoke differently, carried himself like he had seen things, lived through things that didn’t belong in a place like this.

And yet, here he was.

“Are you running from something?” you asked, the words leaving your lips before you could stop them.

Jungwon finally looked at you, his gaze unreadable. For a second, you thought he wasn’t going to answer.

Then, he leaned forward, resting his forearms on his knees. “I wouldn’t say running.”

You raised an eyebrow. “Then what?”

He exhaled, watching the lantern light flicker. “Looking.”

“For what?”

Jungwon tapped his fingers against his knee, as if debating how much to say. Then, with a slight shrug, he murmured, “Something worth staying for.”

Something about the way he said it made your breath hitch.

You didn’t know why, but your heart beat a little faster at those words.

“You make it sound like nothing has ever been worth staying for,” you said quietly.

Jungwon didn’t respond right away. Instead, he leaned back, stretching his arms before giving you a small, lopsided grin, like he was trying to shake off whatever weight had settled on his shoulders.

“I guess I just haven’t found it yet,” he said.

You swallowed. There was something bittersweet about his tone. You wanted to press further, to ask what places he’d been, what he had seen, what had made him so restless. But something told you he wouldn’t answer, not tonight.

So instead, you forced a smirk and nudged his shoulder. “Well, good luck with that, wanderer.”

Jungwon chuckled. “Wanderer, huh?”

“You don’t stay in one place, you’re constantly looking for something… the name fits.”

He tilted his head, considering. “I guess that makes you the opposite, then.”

You blinked. “What do you mean?”

Jungwon turned to you, the lantern’s warm glow reflecting in his dark eyes. “You want roots. Stability. A quiet life. You’re the kind of person who dreams of staying.”

You parted your lips, surprised at how easily he read you.

“…Yeah,” you admitted. “I do.”

Jungwon hummed, a knowing look in his eyes. “Guess that means we’re different, huh?”

You stared at him, your fingers tightening around your cup.

Different.

So why did it feel like, despite that difference, you were being pulled toward him anyway?

The stars twinkled above you, oblivious to the growing tension between the two of you. Somewhere in the distance, cicadas hummed, filling the silence.

You looked away first. “Yeah. We are.”

But for some reason, it didn’t feel like a bad thing.

The days blurred into each other, and before you knew it, your one-month stay was nearing its end.

You tried not to dwell on it too much. You busied yourself with your little cousins, indulging them with stories of the city and answering their endless questions. You helped out in the house, assisted in small village errands, and even tried your best to get used to working in the fields, though that part was still a disaster.

And then there was Jungwon.

Somehow, without meaning to, he had become a part of your everyday life. He was there in the mornings, showing up at your cousin’s house to borrow something, throwing a teasing remark your way. He was there in the afternoons, passing by while you played with the kids, making fun of your storytelling skills. And he was there in the evenings, sitting on the wooden steps with you, sharing drinks and small conversations under the stars.

But as the days passed, you couldn’t ignore the shift in the air. The teasing never stopped, but there were moments now—small, fleeting ones, where the playfulness softened, replaced by something else.

Like when he lingered just a little longer when handing you something.

Like when his gaze held yours for a second too long before he looked away.

Like when he stopped teasing you and instead just… listened.

It terrified you.

Because you knew this wouldn’t last.

One evening, as the sky burned with the last light of the sunset, you found yourself walking along the edge of the rice fields. The golden stalks swayed gently, whispering secrets to the wind. Jungwon was walking beside you, hands in his pockets, his usual easygoing expression in place.

“You’re quiet today,” he remarked.

You kicked at a stray pebble on the dirt path. “Just… thinking.”

“About?”

You hesitated. “Leaving.”

Jungwon didn’t say anything right away. Instead, he kept his gaze forward, his lips pressing into a firm line for a brief second before his usual smirk appeared.

“So, city life finally calling you back?” he said, his tone light, but there was something beneath it you couldn’t quite place.

You nodded. “I have to take my board exam. Then start working.”

“Right.”

Silence stretched between you, only broken by the distant croaking of frogs and the rustling of the fields.

You glanced at him. “You’re not saying anything annoying. That’s suspicious.”

Jungwon let out a chuckle, shaking his head. “What, you want me to tease you about leaving?”

You sighed. “No. I don’t know.”

A pause. Then, he tilted his head toward you. “Are you excited?”

You blinked at him. “About?”

“Going back. Getting away from this place.”

You opened your mouth, then closed it. Were you?

You had been, at the start. The first week here had been difficult, adjusting to the slower pace, dealing with the mud, getting teased for your city-girl habits. You missed the convenience of the city, the efficiency, the movement. But now…

You weren’t sure anymore.

“I should be,” you admitted. “I mean, this isn’t my life.”

Jungwon hummed. “Yeah.”

That was all he said. Yeah.

And for some reason, it made your chest tighten.

You frowned, suddenly frustrated. “You’re acting weird.”

Jungwon quirked a brow. “Am I?”

“Yes.”

He chuckled. “Maybe you’re just imagining things.”

You huffed. “That’s exactly something a weird person would say.”

Jungwon grinned, nudging your arm. “Fine. What do you want me to say? That I’ll miss you?”

Your breath hitched, but you forced a laugh. “Obviously. I’m the highlight of your summer.”

“Right, how could I forget?” he teased.

But his smile didn’t quite reach his eyes.

Neither of you said it, but you both felt it.

This would end soon.

And neither of you knew what to do about it.

Your departure was only days away, and yet, the one thing you hadn’t expected happened.

Jungwon disappeared.

Jungwon was gone.

One day, he was there, teasing you, lingering in doorways, stealing glances when he thought you weren’t looking. And then suddenly, he wasn’t.

You didn’t notice it at first. You had been too preoccupied, too caught up in the last few days of your stay, making sure you spent enough time with your cousins before leaving. But then a whole day passed without seeing him. Then another. And another.

At first, you brushed it off. Maybe he was busy. Maybe his family needed him for something.

But then you asked.

And the answer sent an uncomfortable chill down your spine.

“He left,” one of your cousins told you, chewing absently on a piece of sugarcane. “Said he had something urgent to take care of.”

You stared at them, the words sinking in like stones in water. “Left? Where?”

They shrugged. “Dunno. Just packed up and went.”

Just like that. No warning. No explanation. No goodbye.

You laughed bitterly, shaking your head. “Figures.”

But it wasn’t funny. Not even a little.

You had spent the last month getting used to him—his teasing, his stupid smirks, the way he made you feel like he saw through you even when you didn’t want him to. You had spent weeks trying to figure him out, to understand the way he spoke in half-truths, always dodging real answers with a joke or a smirk.

And now, when you were finally starting to understand him, when you were finally starting to accept that maybe, just maybe, he had become a part of this place for you., he was gone.

Without a word.

You hated him for it.

It burned, hot and unforgiving in your chest.

Because you had told him. You had told him you were leaving soon, given him time to prepare, time to say something, anything.

But instead, he left first.

Coward.

You had never expected anything from Jungwon. At least, that’s what you told yourself. He had been nothing but a fleeting presence in your life, a summer memory that was never meant to last.

So why did it feel like a betrayal?

The worst part was, no one else seemed to care. Life in the countryside moved on, unaffected by his absence. Your cousins still played in the fields, your relatives still sat around after meals gossiping about the neighbors, the sun still rose and set like it always did.

But for you, something had shifted.

You left two days later, not bothering to ask about him again.

If Jungwon didn’t care enough to say goodbye, then neither did you.

At least, that’s what you told yourself.

But the bitterness sat in your chest long after you boarded the bus back to the city.

And no matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t shake the feeling that he had stolen something from you when he left, something you hadn’t even realized you were willing to give.

Months passed, but the feeling lingered—quiet, persistent, unshaken.

You told yourself it didn’t matter. That he didn’t matter.

But then, on your first day at work, stepping into the emergency department, the smell of antiseptic thick in the air, you looked up…

And there he was.

Jungwon.

Standing just a few feet away, sleeves rolled up, paramedic radio clipped to his belt, laughing at something a nurse said.

Your breath caught.

Of all the places in the world…

[part one][part two][part three]

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[littlcdarlin]

My Burning Sun Will Someday Rise — the journey home

summary: Joel drives you home from the airport after your vacation. You miss him as soon as he's gone. warnings: daddy kink (mentioned once), big age gap (23 & 49), orgasm control (reader needs Joel's permission), slight angst, phone sex in your parents' home (the most mortifying thing I can think of actually)

note: sorry this took me so long, I lowkey forgot about it tbh. It's a little angsty, but I swear that angst will be resolved!! Idk when, because I'm writing a different oneshot atm, but at some point I plan on writing more smut & a confrontation with reader's Dad. Enjoy these head canons in the meantime, and thank you for your love on this series <3333

Your Dad calls while you’re still at the airport & Joel tells him he got you home safely (your panties are still ruined from how badly you wanted Joel on the plane, his hand on your thigh the entire time)

He puts the luggage in the trunk of his Bronco, and before you’ve made it halfway home, he pulls over to a deserted parking lot by the side of the road & makes you ride him in the car

So good, baby, let me have it one last time. He comes inside of you like he did every time he fucked you during your trip, and when you grab your tissues to clean yourself, he asks you to leave it, baby, want you to remember me when you get home

So you do, because you always do what he tells you, and because you don’t want to let him go completely just yet. The rest of the way both of you are very quiet

Joel pulls up to your Dad’s house (you’re staying with him to help him with his leg), and before you can get out, he pulls you into a hug, and kisses the side of your head

Hope ya had a good time. You want to cry but you also don’t want to seem clingy, so you nod. Joel doesn’t let you go for a few minutes

When you pull away to say goodbye, he looks like your Dad’s Joel again, wearing his boots instead of flip flops, a pair of jeans instead of your beloved trunks, and his linen shirt is nowhere to be seen

Take care, kid. Call me if you need anything, alright? And don’t study too hard.

Before you can answer, the front door opens and your Dad greets you, leg still in a cast, and considerably less tan than you and Joel

When you get out to greet him, you feel Joel’s cum drip out of you and into your cotton panties. You glance at Joel, who seems to understand and raises one playful eyebrow — he’s still your Joel, no matter his clothes

Your Dad hugs you and the entire time you think he'll be able to smell Joel on you, his clothes you kept wearing, his shampoo you used when you were too lazy to get yours from your own hotel room, his sweat and spit and cum on you, but your Dad just walks over to Joel's window and thanks him

"Had a good time with my girl?"

Joel doesn't really meet his eye, and you think to yourself that my girl is a term only applicable if Joel says it, but he just agrees, says the food was good and that you studied a lot

And that's it, Joel drives away with one last glance at you in the sun, and then he's gone and a strange emptiness settles over you

You tell your Dad you need some time for yourself after a week of socializing, which he doesn't question, so you say good night, plop down on your bed and put on a movie. You don't want to shower, not when you can still feel Joel inside of you

It takes you around twenty minutes to pull out your phone, and when you do, you've already got a message from Joel

Miss you already, baby. At the risk of sounding desperate, call me if you need a break from studying.

The proper punctuation makes you smile and want to cry at the same time, Joel's age so obvious. You take a couple of seconds to answer and fight the urge to call him and ask him to just take you away to live at his place, your Dad be damned

miss you too. can still feel you inside of me. trying hard not to call you right now

Almost immediately, your phone lights up with Joel's name, and then he's there, his beautiful face taking up the majority of the screen, and although you try hard not to cry, you feel tears burning your eyes

You tell Joel you miss your vacation already, that you wish you could go back, that you don't want to sleep alone tonight. You wonder if he just wanted to have phone sex with you and instead got this jumbled up mess of feelings and tears

But there's just kindness and warmth in his eyes, and when he tells you he wishes you were there with him, watching a movie together instead of alone, relief floods your body. He talks to you in his soothing voice until you stop crying, tells you you can always come over

You're scared to ask him what he means, if he's offering a shoulder to cry on, or if he actually wants to keep seeing you, but when he sees the expression on your face, he asks you to come to his place tomorrow and talk there, instead of over the phone

You agree, already longing for his arms around your body, and when you ask him to make you feel good in a hushed voice, he is quiet for a couple of seconds

Want me to help you get off in your Dad's house? You're not even home in your apartment and you already need it this bad?

It's humiliating in a way that switches off your brain, Joel's words exactly what you need to get lost in him – he isn't pretending what the two of you are doing isn't completely reckless and fucked, instead, he embraces it, makes you get off on it

He makes you use your fingers instead of a vibrator, and they feel strikingly small after being stretched out on Joel's cock for a week. By now, he knows your sounds well enough to tell you to stop when you're close, and only after bringing you right to the edge three times with little more than his dirty words, and you beg him with tears in your eyes, Daddy please, he lets you come

That's it, baby, you have my permission.

When you're done, you wonder why he hasn't touched himself, anxiety bubbling up inside of you, but Joel tells you he wants to focus on you, that he'll take care of it when you've gone to bed.

You tell him again how much you miss him, that you don't want to sleep alone, or get off alone, or eat alone, or with anyone else. Joel smiles sadly, and sighs. Don't gotta get off alone, kid, just text me whenever you need me.

But it's all he can offer – his permission to come, but no dinners together, no nights spent basking in his warmth and scent. You take it, though, and promise to ask his permission every time. You know it turns Joel on, but there is also something more intimate about it. The only exclusivity either of you can offer each other at the moment

You both fall asleep while still on FaceTime, but in the morning, your phone is dead

taglist: @allydiasx@b1bbles@monamedeiros12@brittmb115@dansdonunts @mattevioletgirl @pedrospurplerain @fsiryspit @strangerthingslover69 @thanyatargaryen @chochoooooooooo @guelyury @iloveumorethanlove @neayinia @yesjazzywazzylove-blog @clancysinferno @bbyanarchist @pedrofan @cr3aturef3ar @malfoycassimalfoy @akah565

[nashusglasses]

2. (let me hear you say) please (m)

+ based off nsfw prompts: 25. “On all fours, right now!” + 53.  “Don’t test me.”

note: happy thirsty thursday! these prompts are from this list. if you'd like, send me two prompts and a lads man for next week :)

note 2: Caleb nation this one's for u!!!!! I saw someone edit the lads men in sweatshirts and literally lost my mind when I saw Caleb like tell me he's not the most college romance love interest EVER ToT!!!!!!!!!!! anyway i went clubbing the other week and my personal headcanon is that Caleb doesn't like going but he sees u looking pretty n sparkly under the lights and all of a sudden the loud music isn't so bad <3

PAIRING. caleb/reader GENRE. established relationship/sort of college AU? WARNINGS. recreational drug use, alcohol consumption, oral (f receiving)/face sitting SUMMARY. “If I make you come in two minutes, will you do anything I tell you to do?” WORD COUNT. 1.2k

You have two tells to indicate when you’re drunk or high (or a nice mix of both). One: you don’t stop talking.

Two: you get inexorably horny.

Caleb is the (un)fortunate victim to both these whims.

All you remember is being offered whiskey neat, Tara slipping moon rocks into your palm, garish neon lights in your periphery as you danced to the music. Bodies on sweaty bodies on gyrating bodies. Caleb stuck to your back the entire time, and he’d done his due diligence in ordering a ride back home when the clock hit 1:30 and you couldn’t stop whisper-yapping into his ear about how good he looked in black. 

You high-tail it to your bedroom once you make it past the front door. Caleb barely slips your heels off your feet when you plop onto the bed, shimmy your skirt and panties off and wail dramatically:

“Oh my god. I think I’m gonna die if you don’t put your mouth on me.”

“I won’t let you die. Does your head hurt if you lie down like that?”

“A little.”

“Get on all fours.” You take ten seconds to process the fact that he’s actually indulging you, and another five to realize you haven’t followed his instructions yet. You think there’s cotton in all corners of your brain. “Now,” he says, half-exasperated. 

He has to grab your hips and haul you over because he knows it’ll be another 500 years for you to process everything. You barely stick the landing. You settle on your elbows, wiggling your butt in what you hope is a tantalizing motion. 

“Like what you see–ow! Did you just bite me?”

“No,” he lies. You twitch from the feel of his teeth on your asscheek. “Probably a ghost.”

You immediately conjure up a blurry image of hot ghost anal. You’re both very intrigued and slightly disgusted. “That sounds hot.”

Caleb snorts. You feel the bed dip underneath you, warm breath on your mound. You’re about to ask what he’s up to when two hands grab your hips down to lick where you’re embarrassingly wet.

Your tongue is a brick behind your teeth. “Oh god–”

“Let me hear you.” You both know you have it in you to be louder. But your head fogs over into stillness so calm all you can do is roll your hips downwards to show he’s got you feeling good. Caleb takes the bait easily. He sucks on your clit till your brain finally connects to the muscles in your jaw and you mewl, clawing at the sheets. “‘Atta girl.”

He slaps your ass as a reward. You squeal with the sting. “Ugh. Do that again.”

“You’re so needy.” He slaps it again regardless, and you hum in satisfaction. “If I make you come in two minutes, will you do anything I tell you to do?”

You laugh. You’re most definitely coming in less time than that, and the kiss he leaves on your cunt nearly tips you too far. “Depends on what you’re asking for.”

Caleb feigns contemplation with prolonged silence. You can’t see him but you know he’s grinning. “Washing the sheets when we’re done.”

Trust him to come up with something so pedestrian, but you know he’s got the ick for all the sparkles you’re rubbing into the bed every time you shift on your forearms. “Oh my god you’re such a loser.”

“Hey.” He licks at you in punishment, wet tongue for even wetter pleasure. “Don’t test me. Maybe I’ll just leave you here.”

“No–!” 

When he makes the move to slide away, you steel your knees and drop down. Exactly where Caleb wants you, because he grips your ass and eats you out in such spectacular fashion you’re two flicks away from sobbing. “You’re so easy,” he taunts. You’d bite back with a snarky response, but your brain lags reality to four frames per second.

“Mm,” is all you say. You’re always greedy with his mouth. You know he gets off to your desperation. “You just do it so well.”

“Do what?”

He draws a lazy pattern with a taut tongue, warmth unfurling from your gut down to your toes.  “That,” you moan, “just like that.”

You burn with every kiss he leaves on your aching clit. Caleb lets you settle into the muted noise inside your head, laser-focused on the way he tastes you like you’re his favourite flavour of the night. Your thighs are starting to tingle into jelly.

He lets up with a deep breath. “You’re so hot like this,” he groans, and your eyes roll back when he shoves his tongue as deep as he can go.  

“Fuck. Close–!”

You’re almost tempted to beg for his fingers, but he obeys your command with so much fervour you nearly pass out. He seizes the meat of your thighs, skin smarting where his nails catch to bring you in deeper. You choke on your next inhale. “Caleb–ngh–!”

You tense from the promise of an explosion, rock a slow rhythm into his face and you feel him groan. “Ride my face harder,” he calls. A dangerous feeling in your core flickers at the command.

It starts on your knees. Settling your weight back and forth till Caleb takes the lead, adjusting every stroke with a pliant jaw until he can hear you keening from the back of your throat. Your head is hazy with each heavy movement. “Feels…”

“Nn?” (He purrs. The sound rips straight through you.)

“Feels so good,” you whine. “God you’re gonna make me come.”

Your shoulders are starting to ache. But the pain fizzles into a swelling ache where Caleb guzzles on your most sensitive spots, and you revel in the nasty sound of him slurping up on your slick. “Oh don’t stop–yes–!”

Every single cell in your body splits into a frenzy for an orgasm Caleb coaxes out so easily, and you shriek through wave after wave of literal bliss. 

Your thighs are shaking. You’re vibrating down to your fingernails. You realize you’re probably smothering Caleb’s nose but you can’t stop grinding down into his mouth. “Oh my god,” you heave through the come down, burying your face in your hands. “Caleb–ngh–fuck, please–”

He leaves one last kiss on your clit. “You’re so sensitive tonight.”

He’s not wrong. You swear you can feel every single thread on this bedsheet. But your mind is still garbled with post-orgasm euphoria and all you can mumble is: “I don’t want to do the laundry.”

Caleb slips out from underneath you, helping you flop onto your back before sitting on the edge of the bed. He strokes a gentle rhythm on your cheek. You want to say something about his boner. You also want to tell him he’s the bestest boyfriend ever and that his cologne smells so, so yummy and that you want to merge existences till your souls are irrevocably intertwined with one another.

“You should at least take your makeup off,” he sighs. “You’re just gonna complain in the morning about how dirty you feel. Wait. Are you crying?”

You sniff away the sudden wave of tears. “You’re the literal god of giving head.”

Caleb shakes with laughter, then pulls at your dead arms. “I’m glad you think so. Come on, get up.”

“But you’re still hard.”

“Don’t mind that. I need you in the bathroom. Think you can wash your face without me?”

“Thank you for taking care of me,” you mumble, completely ignoring him. You sit upright, fall into his chest, and pass out immediately.

.

.

.

(When you wake up in the morning, the sheets are changed and your eyelashes are mascara-free. You start to cry again.)

[blushsturns]

bad boy!matt x librarian!reader valentine's day drabble ꨄ

w/c: 721

you can find more of the pairing here!

“thank you for the flowers. they’re beautiful.”

matt’s lips curve up into wide grin at your words on the other end of the call. he was waiting for you to get home to see the surprise on your doorstep. he could’ve dropped them off at your job, but he figured having them delivered to your front door would be more romantic, and less problematic for you. “i’m so glad you like them. beautiful flowers for a beautiful girl. happy valentine’s day, gorgeous”

you were completely and utterly surprised when you got home from work. today was valentine’s day and you absolutely loved the holiday. sure, it was just another day of the year that you spread love and gratitude to the loved ones in your life, but you were a hopeless romantic at heart. romance novels and movies, happy endings, tear jerking, butterfly roaming, swoon worthy stories about everlasting love made your heart swell up of endless possibilities for that kind of love to find you one day.

even though you had to work this morning, matt managed to surprise you and leave your cheeks warm and blushy and your heart swelling in your chest. maybe he could possibly be the love you were so desperately hoping for one day. you were a little bummed that he didn’t stop in to see you at the library, but you hoped that you could still possibly see him later today.

his words made your cheeks feel extremely warm, a soft giggle emitting from your lips as you place a strand of your hair over your ear. “happy valentine’s day, matt. you know for a bad boy, you sure do know how to make a girl smile.”

you could hear his infectious laugh on the other end of the phone, which was like music to your ears. you were getting used to fitting him into your daily routine. it was almost like you had to talk to him, or you’d start to feel off. you weren’t sure what those feelings meant, and how you truly felt in general about him, but you liked his presence and talking to him in general. he always knew what to say to make you smile and feel giddy. it was so easy and comfortable talking to him and being around him.

“well, lucky for you, i only have time out of my bad boy schedule to make one girl smile.” he let out another laugh, hesitating on his words for a moment before speaking again. “hey, what are you doing tonight? do you have any plans?”

you twirled the strand of your hair around your finger as you kept the phone comfortably pressed against your ear with your other hand. your eyes scanned over to the beautiful roses that you placed in your vase on your desk. you bit onto your bottom lip for a moment as you sat there on your bed, your heart pounding in your chest just from the sound of his voice. what was this boy doing to you? “i don’t have any plans. why? is bad boy matt himself gonna take me out on a date?”

he chuckled again on the other end of the phone. you can just imagine him now, flashing you a small smirk, his body leaning closer to you to get a whiff of his intoxicating cologne and the feeling of his body pressing up against you causing your heart to beat faster in your chest and heat to pool in the pit of your tummy. he didn’t have to physically be in your presence for him to make you feel this way, but when you two were together, things felt insanely electflying. the effect this boy had on you was insane, but you were loving every second of it.

“maybe i am. what do you say, pretty librarian? wanna go on a date with me tonight?”

you didn’t even have to think twice when he asked you. it may of been embarrassing the way you responded so quickly, but you didn’t care. this boy made your heart swoon and you couldn’t get enough. maybe he’d break your heart, maybe he wouldn’t. but the ride would be worth it.

“i would absolutely love to. pick me up at 7, and don’t be late or i’ll have to give you a late fee.”

notes: thank you for reading! happy valentine’s day. ❤️

taglist:

@sturnshood @strangelife122 @jessie-essie @rina3476 @chrissturnioloslvt @sturnslutz @sturns-mermaid @matthewsturnsgf @christmastreecake @rinahasspots @222wall876 @chris-hallelujah @izzylovesmatt @strniloslvts @oopsiedaisydeer @sophand4n4 @xclusivedesires @mattsplaything @poppingmypussy4chris @mattsbunnyxx @pair-of-pantaloons @chrissweetheart @slutformatt17 @sturnl0ve @pasteldreams @h3arts4harry @marrykisskilled @wh0remikasas @sturnzslut @camzeecorner @alesturniolos @emely9274 @2muchofaslvt @y3sterdaysproblem @sturnslux3 @bowsandsturniolos @moustacherryismyhusband @rafesapprentice @ivysturnss @headzgonewest @strawberryghost3 @il0vey0um0st @violetstxrniolo777 @bigbeefybitch @raesturns @courta13 @sofieeeeex @tylerthecreatorsglazr @kittyyyyykats @sturniolochrismatt

[gottencents]

Casual PT.4 - Yu Jimin

part one. | part two. | part three.

pairing. mean girl!karina x star soccer player!reader

synopsis. at Changryeo University, Yu Jimin or just Karina is the ultimate “mean rich girl” — popular, wealthy, and always seeking ways to stay on top. After setting her sights on Sunghoon, the charming soccer captain, Karina shifts her focus to Y/N, an up-and-coming soccer star with an unexpected breakout season. Unlike the polished Sunghoon, Y/N is more of an outsider who got by on talent but doesn’t fit the typical college elite mold. Realizing that Y/N is the only one who doesn’t care about the social hierarchy, Karina proposes a deal: they’ll fake date so Karina can boost her popularity, while Y/N gets protection from relentless attention. Reluctantly, Y/N agrees, and the two navigate a world of social manipulation, only to find that their fake relationship might lead to something more real than either expected.

The ride home from Karina’s parents’ house felt lighter than Y/N had anticipated. The lingering nerves from the evening had finally dissolved, replaced by a warm sense of belonging. Karina hummed softly along with the radio as she drove, her hand resting comfortably on Y/N’s thigh.

“You were perfect,” Karina said, breaking the peaceful silence. “I knew they’d love you.”

Y/N chuckled, leaning back in her seat. “You think? I was sure I said at least three awkward things.”

“You were charming,” Karina reassured her. “Even when you nearly knocked over the water pitcher.”

Y/N groaned, covering her face. “I was hoping we could forget that.”

“Never,” Karina teased, her eyes glinting with mischief. “It was adorable.”

As the car pulled into Y/N’s building, Karina parked and turned toward her, her expression softening. “I’m really proud of you. I know tonight wasn’t easy.”

Y/N nodded, feeling the weight of Karina’s words. “Thanks. It actually felt… nice. I liked seeing that side of your life.”

“You’ll be seeing more of it,” Karina promised, reaching out to tuck a stray strand of hair behind Y/N’s ear. “You’re stuck with me now.”

Y/N smiled, her heart fluttering at the intimacy of the moment. “I guess I can live with that.”

They lingered for a second longer before Y/N reluctantly opened the car door. Karina followed her out, walking her to the entrance of the building. The air was crisp, the quiet hum of the city night wrapping around them like a soft blanket.

Just as Y/N was about to say goodnight, Karina’s phone buzzed. She glanced at it, her brow furrowing slightly.

“Everything okay?” Y/N asked.

Karina hesitated before nodding. “Yeah. It’s just work stuff. I’ll handle it later.”

Y/N raised a brow. “You sure? You can take it if it’s urgent.”

“It’s nothing that can’t wait,” Karina said quickly, slipping her phone back into her pocket.

Y/N studied her for a moment, sensing something just beneath the surface. But before she could press further, Karina leaned in, capturing Y/N’s lips in a slow, lingering kiss that left no room for questions.

“Goodnight, baby,” Karina whispered against her lips.

“Goodnight,” Y/N replied, her voice barely audible.

She watched Karina walk back to her car, her heart full yet tinged with curiosity. Something about that text felt… off. But she trusted Karina, and if it was important, she’d tell her in time.

The next few days felt normal—almost too normal. They kept up their usual routine: meeting for coffee, texting late into the night, and sharing quiet moments in between classes. But every now and then, Y/N noticed that faraway look in Karina’s eyes, like her mind was somewhere else entirely.

It wasn’t until Friday evening that things started to unravel.

Y/N had invited Karina over for dinner, wanting to spend a quiet night together after a busy week. She was just finishing up cooking when there was a knock on the door. Karina walked in, her expression more tense than usual.

“Hey,” Y/N greeted, wiping her hands on a towel. “Everything okay?”

Karina forced a smile. “Yeah. Just a long day.”

Y/N frowned. “Are you sure? You’ve been a little distracted lately.”

Karina hesitated, her eyes darting away for a brief moment. “It’s just work stuff. Nothing to worry about.”

Y/N crossed her arms, leaning against the counter. “Karina… you know you can talk to me, right? You don’t have to carry everything on your own.”

Karina let out a breath, running a hand through her hair. “I know. I just—” She stopped herself, biting her lip. “It’s not that simple.”

Y/N stepped closer, gently taking Karina’s hands in hers. “It doesn’t have to be simple. Whatever it is, we’ll figure it out together.”

Karina looked at her, conflict swirling in her eyes. “There’s just… a lot going on right now. Work, family stuff—it’s all piling up. I didn’t want to dump it on you.”

Y/N’s grip tightened. “You’re not dumping anything on me. We’re in this together, remember?”

Karina exhaled, her shoulders relaxing just a little. “I know. I’m sorry if I’ve been distant. It’s just been hard to juggle everything lately.”

Y/N nodded, brushing her thumb over Karina’s knuckles. “We’ll get through it. One step at a time.”

For the first time in days, Karina’s smile felt real, not forced. “I don’t know what I did to deserve you.”

“You bribed me with coffee,” Y/N said with a playful grin.

Karina laughed softly, the tension in the room finally breaking. “Ah, right. My greatest strategy.”

They settled into dinner, the heaviness of the past few days slowly fading into the background. But even as they laughed and talked, Y/N couldn’t shake the feeling that this was just the beginning of something bigger.

And she was ready—whatever it was, she wasn’t going anywhere.

The weekend passed in a blur, but something about Karina still felt… distant. Y/N tried to shake the thought, telling herself that Karina was just stressed. After all, life could get overwhelming sometimes. It didn’t mean anything deeper was wrong.

Still, the feeling lingered, gnawing at her in the quiet moments.

By Monday, the tension between them was subtle but undeniable. Karina seemed present but distracted, and Y/N could feel herself slipping into her own head, overthinking every little thing. That evening, they had plans to grab dinner at a casual restaurant near campus, but the energy between them was noticeably off.

The restaurant buzzed with life—clinking glasses, laughter, and the smell of fresh food—but Y/N felt like she and Karina were in a bubble of silence.

“You okay?” Y/N asked as they waited for their food, her voice careful but steady.

Karina glanced up from her phone, forcing a small smile. “Yeah, why?”

“You just seem… elsewhere lately,” Y/N said, trying not to sound accusatory. “I’m starting to wonder if something’s wrong and you’re not telling me.”

Karina sighed, placing her phone facedown on the table. “It’s not like that. I’m just handling a lot right now. I didn’t want it to spill over into us.”

“But it is,” Y/N said gently. “You don’t have to go through things alone, Karina. I’m right here. If something’s bothering you, I want to know.”

Karina tapped her fingers on the table, eyes flickering with hesitation. “It’s work,” she admitted. “There’s a project I’m involved in, and it’s complicated. There’s pressure from my team, and I feel like no matter how hard I try, it’s never enough.”

Y/N relaxed slightly, relieved that Karina was finally opening up. “Why didn’t you just tell me that from the start?”

“I didn’t want to drag you into my stress,” Karina confessed. “I know you’ve got enough on your plate. The last thing I want is to weigh you down.”

“You’re not weighing me down,” Y/N said firmly. “Relationships are about sharing the load, right? If something’s heavy, we carry it together.”

Karina’s eyes softened, her expression a mix of gratitude and relief. “You make it sound so easy.”

“It’s not easy,” Y/N said with a small laugh. “But you’re worth the effort.”

Their conversation was interrupted when the waiter set their plates down, and the tension seemed to lighten a little more as they dug into their food. Y/N felt like they’d taken a step forward, but she couldn’t help but notice that Karina’s smile didn’t quite reach her eyes.

Later that night, Y/N lay in bed, staring at her ceiling. The conversation had gone well—or at least, it had felt like progress—but she still couldn’t shake the feeling that there was more Karina wasn’t saying. Something deeper.

Her phone buzzed on the nightstand, pulling her out of her thoughts. She grabbed it, smiling softly when she saw Karina’s name on the screen.

Karina: Thank you for tonight. I really needed that.

Y/N: Always. You know I’m here, right? No matter what.

Karina: I know. Sleep well, baby.

Y/N placed her phone back on the nightstand, her heart warm but still slightly uneasy.

She trusted Karina. But trust didn’t always silence the questions.

The next day, Y/N was on her way to meet Karina for coffee when she spotted her standing outside the café… talking to a tall, sharply dressed woman Y/N didn’t recognize. The woman was leaning in close, her hand resting lightly on Karina’s arm as they spoke in hushed tones.

Y/N’s steps slowed, her stomach twisting.

Who was that?

Karina didn’t notice her at first, too engrossed in the conversation. The woman said something that made Karina laugh—a soft, genuine laugh Y/N hadn’t heard in days.

Y/N cleared her throat as she approached, trying to shake off the sudden spike of jealousy rising in her chest.

“Hey,” she greeted, keeping her voice casual.

Karina’s eyes snapped to her, surprise flashing across her face. “Y/N! Hey, I was just—”

The woman beside her turned, offering Y/N a polite smile. “You must be Y/N. I’ve heard a lot about you.”

Y/N nodded slowly, studying her. “And you are…?”

“Yujin,” the woman said, extending her hand. “I work with Karina.”

Y/N shook her hand, her smile tight. “Nice to meet you.”

Karina shifted on her feet, her eyes darting between Y/N and Yujin. “Yujin was just filling me in on some project updates. Nothing major.”

“Right,” Yujin said with a chuckle. “Nothing major.”

Y/N didn’t miss the way Yujin’s gaze lingered on Karina for a second too long.

“Well, I’ll let you two catch up,” Yujin said, giving Karina a knowing smile before walking off. “See you tomorrow.”

Y/N watched her leave, her chest tightening.

“She seems… friendly,” Y/N said, her tone carefully neutral.

Karina rubbed the back of her neck. “Yeah, she’s… helpful. We’ve been working closely on this project. She’s just really involved, that’s all.”

Y/N nodded, trying to push down the doubt bubbling inside her. “Right.”

Karina reached for her hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. “Hey. Don’t overthink it, okay? There’s nothing to worry about.”

Y/N smiled faintly, but the knot in her chest didn’t loosen.

“I’m not worried,” she said softly. But deep down, she wasn’t sure she believed it.

As they walked into the café together, Y/N tried to shake the feeling that something was shifting between them—something she couldn’t quite put her finger on yet.

But one thing was certain: cracks were beginning to form. And sooner or later, those cracks would have to be confronted.

Y/N woke up the next morning feeling heavy, the previous day’s encounter with Yujin replaying over and over in her mind. She tried to dismiss it, telling herself that it was silly to be jealous. Karina had been nothing but honest with her. And yet… something about Yujin didn’t sit right. It wasn’t what was said—it was what wasn’t.

All morning, Y/N’s thoughts lingered on that smile Yujin had given Karina, the familiarity between them. It felt like she was standing on shaky ground, waiting for the cracks beneath her feet to widen.

By the time she met up with Karina for lunch, she’d decided that she needed to talk about it. Not in an accusatory way—just… clear the air.

Karina was already sitting at their usual table in the campus café, scrolling through her phone. When she saw Y/N approach, her face lit up with that familiar smile that had once been enough to calm all of Y/N’s worries.

But not today.

“Hey, you,” Karina greeted, standing to give Y/N a quick hug.

“Hey,” Y/N said, hugging her back before sitting across from her.

They ordered their food, chatting idly about their morning classes, but Y/N could barely focus. The tension in her chest was building, and she knew she wouldn’t be able to push it aside for much longer.

Finally, she took a deep breath. “Karina… can I ask you something?”

Karina set her fork down, tilting her head slightly. “Of course. What’s up?”

“It’s about Yujin,” Y/N said carefully. “I know you said you’ve been working closely with her, but… is there something I should know?”

Karina blinked, her expression unreadable for a moment before she leaned back in her chair. “What do you mean?”

Y/N hesitated. “It’s just… the way she looked at you yesterday. It felt a little more personal than just work. And you seemed caught off guard when I showed up.”

Karina sighed, crossing her arms. “Y/N, there’s nothing going on between me and Yujin. She’s just a colleague. We’ve spent a lot of time together because of this project, and I guess we’ve gotten… close. But not in the way you’re thinking.”

Y/N nodded slowly, trying to absorb her words. “I’m not accusing you of anything. I trust you. It’s just… I’ve seen how people can blur lines when they work together. I guess it made me feel a little insecure.”

Karina leaned forward, resting her hand on Y/N’s. “You have nothing to be insecure about. Yujin is a great coworker, but that’s all she is. You’re the one I want to be with. You’re the one I care about.”

Y/N felt her chest loosen at Karina’s words, but a small part of her still clung to that lingering doubt.

“I believe you,” Y/N said, squeezing Karina’s hand. “I just needed to hear it from you.”

Karina smiled softly. “I get it. And I’ll do better at making sure you feel secure. We’re in this together, okay?”

Y/N nodded, a smile creeping onto her lips. “Okay.”

The following week felt lighter, like they’d turned a corner. Karina was more attentive, texting Y/N throughout the day, making time for little moments just for the two of them. It was exactly what Y/N needed—a reminder that their relationship was strong, built on something real.

But then, one evening, while Y/N was studying in the library, her phone buzzed with a text.

Yujin: Hey, are you free? I need to talk to you about something important.

Y/N froze, staring at the message. Why would Yujin be texting her? They barely knew each other.

Her fingers hovered over the keyboard before she finally replied.

Y/N: Sure. What’s up?

Yujin: Can we meet in person? It’s better if we talk face to face.

Y/N’s heart started to race. Something told her that whatever Yujin had to say, it wasn’t going to be good.

Y/N: Okay. Where do you want to meet?

Yujin: The coffee shop on 5th. See you in 20 minutes.

Y/N grabbed her things, her mind spinning with possibilities. What could Yujin possibly want to talk about?

As she walked to the coffee shop, she couldn’t shake the feeling that this was a turning point—one that could change everything.

When she arrived, Yujin was already there, sitting at a table near the window. She looked up as Y/N walked in, offering a small, almost hesitant smile.

“Thanks for coming,” Yujin said as Y/N sat down across from her.

“Of course,” Y/N said, folding her hands on the table. “What’s going on?”

Yujin took a deep breath, her eyes serious. “I didn’t want to get involved, but… I think you deserve to know the truth about Karina and me.”

Y/N’s blood ran cold.

“What truth?”

Yujin leaned in slightly, her voice low. “We’ve been spending a lot of time together—too much time. And I think… Karina might have feelings for me.”

The words hit Y/N like a punch to the gut.

“She hasn’t said it outright,” Yujin continued, “but the way she looks at me, the way she confides in me… it’s more than just friendship. I thought you should know before it gets any more complicated.”

Y/N sat there, stunned into silence. Her mind screamed that it wasn’t true, that Karina loved her, that Yujin was just reading into things.

But the doubt she’d buried deep inside was back, louder than ever.

“I thought you should know,” Yujin said again, her eyes filled with something that almost looked like pity.

Y/N swallowed hard, trying to steady her voice. “Thanks for telling me.”

She stood up, barely remembering how she got out of the coffee shop, her thoughts a chaotic mess.

Was it true?

Had she been blind to something that was right in front of her?

Her phone buzzed in her pocket. It was a text from Karina.

Karina: Miss you. Want to grab dinner later?

Y/N stared at the message, her heart aching. She had a choice to make—confront Karina or walk away without knowing the full story.

And for the first time in a long time, Y/N wasn’t sure what the right choice was.

Y/N didn’t reply to Karina’s message. She couldn’t. The weight of Yujin’s words sat in her chest like a stone, suffocating and relentless. The walk back to her apartment felt longer than usual, her thoughts spiraling with questions she didn’t want to answer.

Was Yujin lying? Exaggerating? Or had Y/N truly been naive, ignoring what had been in front of her all along?

Her phone buzzed again. Another text from Karina.

Karina: Everything okay? You’ve been quiet.

Y/N stared at the screen, her thumb hovering over the keyboard. She could just brush it off, pretend everything was fine. But she couldn’t shake the echo of Yujin’s voice. “I think Karina might have feelings for me.”

Instead of replying, Y/N shoved her phone into her pocket and locked her door behind her, sinking onto the couch. Her mind played through every interaction Karina had ever had with Yujin, searching for signs—something she’d missed.

Her breath hitched. There were moments. Fleeting, almost insignificant, but in hindsight… they felt different now. The late nights Karina spent with Yujin at the library. The way Karina’s face lit up when Yujin walked into the room.

Y/N pressed her hands to her face, trying to push the thoughts away, but it was useless.

Hours passed, the sun dipping below the horizon, casting her apartment in shadows. Finally, she couldn’t take it anymore.

She needed answers.

Her fingers trembled as she typed out a message.

Y/N: Can we talk?

The response came almost immediately.

Karina: Of course. I’ll come over.

It didn’t take long for Karina to arrive. The moment Y/N opened the door, Karina’s face lit up with that familiar warmth. But Y/N couldn’t return the smile.

“Hey,” Karina said softly, stepping inside and closing the door behind her. “Is everything okay? You seem off.”

Y/N crossed her arms, leaning against the wall. “I ran into Yujin today.”

Karina blinked, her smile fading. “Oh?”

“She said some interesting things.” Y/N’s voice was calm, but there was an edge to it that she couldn’t hide. “She told me I deserve to know the truth. About you and her.”

Karina’s eyes widened, her posture stiffening. “Y/N—”

“She said you might have feelings for her,” Y/N continued, cutting Karina off. “That the way you look at her, the way you confide in her… it’s more than just friendship.”

The silence that followed was suffocating.

Karina opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out. That hesitation—that split second of silence—felt like confirmation.

Y/N’s heart broke a little more.

“Is it true?” Y/N asked, her voice barely a whisper. “Do you have feelings for her?”

“No,” Karina said quickly, stepping closer. “It’s not like that. Yujin’s misunderstanding everything. I care about her as a friend, but that’s all. I swear.”

“But she thinks it’s more,” Y/N said bitterly. “Why would she say that if there wasn’t something there? Even just a hint?”

Karina ran a hand through her hair, frustration evident on her face. “I don’t know. Maybe she misinterpreted our closeness. We’ve spent a lot of time together because of the project, but I never gave her a reason to think there was something more.”

Y/N felt tears prick at the corners of her eyes, but she refused to let them fall. “I don’t know if I can believe you.”

Karina’s face crumbled. “Y/N, please… you have to trust me. You’re the one I love. You’re the one I want to be with. Yujin is just a colleague—nothing more.”

“I want to believe you,” Y/N whispered, her voice cracking. “But right now… I don’t know how to.”

Karina reached for Y/N’s hand, but Y/N pulled back, stepping away. The distance between them felt like a chasm, one neither of them knew how to cross.

“I need some time,” Y/N said quietly. “I can’t think straight right now.”

Karina’s eyes filled with pain, but she nodded. “Okay. Take the time you need. But please… don’t shut me out completely.”

Y/N didn’t respond. She just opened the door, silently asking Karina to leave.

Karina hesitated for a moment, her eyes searching Y/N’s face, before stepping out into the hallway.

“I’m not giving up on us,” Karina said, her voice steady despite the sadness in her eyes. “No matter what.”

Y/N closed the door softly, leaning her forehead against it as soon as it clicked shut.

Her chest felt hollow, her mind a storm of conflicting emotions. She wanted to believe Karina. She wanted to forget Yujin’s words and pretend everything was fine.

But doubt had already taken root, and it wasn’t letting go.

For the first time in her relationship with Karina, Y/N felt like she was standing on the edge of something fragile, something that could break at any moment.

And she wasn’t sure if they would survive the fall.

The days that followed were filled with silence—long stretches of uncertainty that clung to Y/N like a second skin. She kept telling herself she needed time, space to think things through, but every passing minute felt like it was pulling her further from Karina.

Karina’s messages continued to light up her phone, each one more desperate than the last.

Karina: Can we talk?

Karina: Please, Y/N, just tell me what you’re thinking.

Karina: I miss you. I’m scared I’m losing you.

Y/N read each one but never responded. She wasn’t ready—not while Yujin’s voice still echoed in her mind.

Yujin wasn’t done either. Her manipulation was a slow, deliberate poison, seeping into every crack she could find. She played her part flawlessly, twisting the truth to her advantage.

She made sure to be around Karina constantly, using their project as the perfect excuse. She acted supportive, compassionate, always there to offer a shoulder to lean on when Karina seemed worn down.

“You okay?” Yujin asked one evening, sitting next to Karina in the campus lounge, their laptops open but forgotten.

Karina sighed, rubbing her eyes. “Not really. Things with Y/N… it’s complicated.”

Yujin tilted her head, her expression laced with feigned concern. “She hasn’t been talking to you?”

“Barely,” Karina admitted, her voice tight. “She said she needed time, but it’s been days. I don’t know what to do.”

Yujin bit her lip, pretending to hesitate. “Maybe she’s struggling with something deeper. Maybe she’s… scared it won’t work.” She paused for dramatic effect before adding, “Or maybe she’s worried because she feels like you’ve changed. Like… you’re not as sure about her anymore.”

Karina frowned. “Why would she think that?”

Yujin offered a small, apologetic smile. “She told me once she felt like she wasn’t enough for you. I think she’s been holding onto that fear. And with how much time we’ve been spending together… maybe she thinks you’re realizing it too.”

Karina’s eyes darkened with guilt. “No. That’s not true. Y/N’s everything to me. I’ve never doubted us.”

“I know,” Yujin said softly, placing a hand on Karina’s arm. “But sometimes, even when we don’t mean to, we give people reasons to doubt.”

The seed was planted—carefully buried in Karina’s mind, just as it had been in Y/N’s.

The next day, Yujin made sure to reach out to Y/N again.

Yujin: Hey, just checking in. I saw Karina today. She’s been really quiet lately. I think she’s struggling with what she wants.

Y/N: Did she say that?

Yujin: Not exactly… but it’s obvious. I think she’s trying to protect your feelings. She doesn’t want to hurt you.

Y/N’s hands trembled as she read the message. She didn’t know what to believe anymore. Yujin had a way of speaking that made every lie sound like the truth.

Her mind spiraled back to the conversation she had with Karina—the hesitation in Karina’s voice, the way she hadn’t immediately denied Yujin’s claim. Maybe Karina really was struggling with her feelings. Maybe Yujin wasn’t lying after all.

Hours later, Karina showed up at Y/N’s door unannounced. Her face was pale, her eyes filled with a raw mix of exhaustion and sadness.

“I couldn’t stay away,” Karina said, her voice barely above a whisper. “I need to know where we stand.”

Y/N crossed her arms, her throat tightening. “Where do we stand, Karina? Because I don’t know anymore. You tell me one thing, and Yujin tells me something else. I feel like I’m being pulled in two different directions, and I don’t know which one to trust.”

Karina’s eyes flashed with anger. “Yujin’s lying to you.”

“Is she?” Y/N shot back, her voice sharp. “Because she seems pretty convinced that you’re unsure about us. That you’ve been confiding in her about things you can’t tell me.”

“I haven’t!” Karina’s frustration boiled over. “Yujin’s twisting everything. She’s manipulating you, Y/N. You’ve known me longer than her—how can you believe her over me?”

“Because I’m scared!” Y/N yelled, the words tearing from her throat. “I’m scared that there’s some truth in what she’s saying. I’m scared that you’ll wake up one day and realize she’s everything you want, and I’m just the person you settled for.”

Karina’s expression shattered, pain written all over her face. “No. No, Y/N, you’re the only person I’ve ever wanted. I love you.”

Y/N’s eyes stung with unshed tears. “Then why does it feel like I’m losing you?”

Karina stepped closer, her voice trembling. “You’re not losing me. But if we let Yujin get between us, if we let her lies destroy what we have, we’ll both lose. Please… trust me.”

Y/N wanted to. God, she wanted to believe Karina with everything she had. But the doubt was still there, a lingering shadow she couldn’t shake.

“I don’t know if I can,” Y/N whispered, her voice breaking. “Not right now.”

Karina nodded slowly, swallowing back her own tears. “Then I’ll wait. For as long as it takes. I’ll prove to you that what we have is real. That it’s worth fighting for.”

Y/N watched her go, the sound of the door closing echoing through the apartment like a final note in a tragic symphony.

She sank onto the couch, her heart in pieces. Part of her wanted to chase after Karina, to beg her to stay. But the other part—the part still poisoned by Yujin’s lies—held her back.

And in that moment, Y/N wasn’t sure which part would win.

The distance between Y/N and Karina grew like a canyon—too wide, too deep. Days turned into a blur of silence, and with each one that passed, Y/N felt the weight of everything they hadn’t said suffocating her.

Karina hadn’t messaged since their last conversation, and for once, Y/N was thankful. Every time her phone lit up, she half-expected to see Yujin’s name again, feeding her another dose of doubt. But it didn’t come. Not yet. The quiet was its own kind of torture.

Y/N walked around campus in a daze, pretending she was fine, but her chest felt heavy, and her head swirled with conflicting thoughts. Every corner she turned, she felt like she’d run into Karina—or worse, Karina and Yujin together.

When it finally happened, it hit harder than Y/N had imagined.

They were in the library, sitting side by side at a table near the window. Karina’s head was bent over her laptop, strands of her dark hair falling into her face. Yujin leaned in, close enough that their shoulders touched, saying something that made Karina smile faintly.

The sight twisted in Y/N’s stomach like a knife.

Before she could think it through, she walked toward them. Her footsteps felt heavier with every step, her heart slamming against her ribs.

“Karina,” Y/N said, her voice steady despite the storm in her chest.

Karina’s head snapped up, her eyes widening in surprise. “Y/N.”

Yujin leaned back casually, her gaze shifting between them. “Oh, hey, Y/N. You finally decided to join us.”

“Can we talk?” Y/N asked, ignoring Yujin.

Karina hesitated, glancing at Yujin. The pause was barely noticeable, but it sent a sharp pang through Y/N’s chest.

“Of course,” Karina said, closing her laptop.

They stepped outside, the cold air biting against Y/N’s skin. For a moment, neither of them spoke. Karina stuffed her hands into her jacket pockets, watching Y/N with cautious eyes.

“I can’t do this anymore,” Y/N said, her voice raw. “I can’t keep pretending I’m okay with you spending all this time with her.”

Karina’s brows furrowed. “It’s work, Y/N. You know that.”

“No,” Y/N snapped, her voice rising. “It’s not just work. She’s been feeding me lies—telling me you’re unsure about us, that you have feelings for her. And then I see you with her, and it’s like… maybe she’s right.”

Karina stepped forward, her voice laced with frustration. “She’s not right. Y/N, I’ve told you before—Yujin’s lying to you. Why can’t you see that?”

“Because she says it so convincingly!” Y/N’s voice cracked, her eyes burning. “And I don’t know what’s real anymore. Every time I see you with her, I feel like I’m losing you piece by piece, and it’s killing me.”

Karina’s face softened, her anger melting into something far more painful. “You’re not losing me. Y/N, you’ve never lost me. Yujin is trying to tear us apart because she wants me for herself, but I don’t want her. I’ve never wanted her. I’ve only ever wanted you.”

Y/N swallowed hard, her throat tightening. “Then why does it feel like I’m fighting for something that’s already slipping through my fingers?”

“Because she’s made you believe that,” Karina whispered, stepping even closer. Her voice trembled as she spoke. “But I’m still here, Y/N. I haven’t gone anywhere. And I won’t, unless you push me away.”

Y/N’s breath hitched, tears brimming in her eyes. “I’m scared.”

“I know,” Karina said softly, her hand reaching for Y/N’s. “But we’re stronger than this. We’ve been through so much together. Don’t let her win. Don’t let her take this from us.”

Y/N stared at Karina’s hand in hers, her pulse racing. For the first time in days, she felt a sliver of clarity—a reminder of everything they had built, everything they had fought for.

But before she could say anything, the door behind them opened, and Yujin stepped out, her eyes glinting with something dark and unreadable.

“Is everything okay?” Yujin asked, feigning concern, though the slight smirk on her face betrayed her intentions.

Y/N’s grip on Karina’s hand tightened. She turned to Yujin, her voice cold. “Actually, no. It’s not.”

Karina straightened beside her, her eyes blazing. “Yujin, we need to talk. Alone.”

For the first time, Yujin’s confident mask faltered.

Y/N crossed her arms, her gaze unwavering. “Yeah, we do. Because it’s time we clear a few things up.”

And just like that, the battle lines were drawn, the air thick with tension. Y/N wasn’t sure where this conversation would lead, but one thing was certain: she was done letting Yujin pull the strings.

It was time to take back control—before it was too late.

The tension in the air was suffocating as Karina and Yujin stood face to face outside the library. Y/N lingered by the door, her heart pounding, arms crossed tightly over her chest. She had trusted Karina to handle this, but the fear of what Yujin might say still clung to her like a shadow.

Karina’s eyes were sharp, her jaw set. “We need to talk—now. No more games, Yujin.”

Yujin tilted her head, her lips curling into a slow, practiced smile. “Games? I think you’re being a bit dramatic. I was just trying to protect you, Karina. I didn’t want you to get hurt.”

Karina’s expression hardened. “Protect me? You’ve been lying to Y/N. Telling her things you know aren’t true. You’ve been trying to push us apart.”

Yujin crossed her arms, her confidence unwavering. “And why would I do that? What could I possibly gain from it?”

Karina scoffed. “Don’t act innocent. You know exactly what you’re doing. You’ve always been good at manipulating people, twisting things until they break.”

Y/N clenched her fists, stepping forward. Her voice was low but steady, carrying a weight that made Yujin falter for just a second. “You told me Karina had feelings for you, that she was confused. You made me doubt her—doubt us. And for what? To get what you want?”

Yujin’s smirk flickered, her eyes narrowing. “I only told you what I thought you needed to hear. If you were so quick to believe it, maybe that says more about your relationship than it does about me.”

The words hit like a slap to the face, leaving Y/N breathless. She swallowed hard, forcing herself to stay grounded. “Don’t twist this around. You wanted me to walk away from her. You made it sound like I was holding her back, like she’d be better off with you.”

“And maybe she would be,” Yujin said smoothly, her voice dropping into something almost tender. “Think about it, Y/N. You’ve been doubting her for weeks now. Isn’t that exhausting? Isn’t it easier to just… let go?”

Karina stepped between them, her voice shaking with anger. “Enough, Yujin. I love her. I’ve always loved her. Nothing you say is going to change that.”

Yujin’s smile faltered, the mask slipping just enough to reveal a flicker of hurt. For the first time, her confidence wavered. “I was just trying to show you what you could have, Karina. Someone who understands your world, who won’t hold you back.”

Karina’s eyes blazed. “What I want is Y/N. And I’ll fight for her, no matter how hard you try to come between us.”

Yujin opened her mouth to respond, but Y/N stepped in, her voice sharp. “You’ve done enough damage. Stay out of our lives, Yujin. I won’t let you poison this anymore.”

The silence that followed was deafening, the weight of the confrontation settling around them like heavy fog. Yujin’s face twisted in frustration, her eyes flicking between Y/N and Karina before she turned on her heel and disappeared into the crowd.

Karina let out a shaky breath, her shoulders sagging with the release of tension. “I’m so sorry,” she whispered, her voice breaking. “I should’ve seen what she was doing sooner. I should’ve protected you from this.”

Y/N shook her head, her throat tight. “It’s not your fault. I should’ve trusted you more. I let her get inside my head.”

Karina stepped closer, cupping Y/N’s face gently, her eyes filled with regret. “We’ve both made mistakes. But I don’t want to lose you—not over her, not over anything.”

Y/N felt the tears spill over, but she didn’t pull away. “You won’t. I’m still here.”

Karina leaned her forehead against Y/N’s, her voice barely a whisper. “Promise me we’ll fight for this. For us.”

Y/N closed her eyes, nodding slowly. “I promise.”

They stood like that for a long moment, clinging to each other as if the world could crumble around them at any second. The storm wasn’t over—not by a long shot. But for the first time in what felt like forever, Y/N felt steady, anchored by Karina’s unwavering presence.

Whatever came next, they would face it together.

And this time, they wouldn’t let anyone tear them apart.

The aftermath of Yujin’s lies wasn’t the dramatic explosion Y/N expected. It wasn’t some sudden, clean resolution. Instead, it was an unrelenting ache—one that seeped into everything she did, coloring every word she spoke to Karina and every glance they exchanged.

It had been days since the confrontation with Yujin. Days since the air between Y/N and Karina had shifted into something heavy and unfamiliar. There were no more accusations or harsh words, but there also wasn’t the same ease that used to come naturally between them. Their conversations were polite but guarded, their touches cautious.

Y/N felt like she was walking a tightrope, afraid to say the wrong thing and break whatever fragile peace they had left. And every time Karina’s phone buzzed, her stomach twisted into knots. Even though Yujin was no longer in the picture, the damage she left behind lingered.

It’s not like I can undo it, Y/N thought bitterly one night as she stared at the ceiling of her bedroom. I can’t unhear what she said. I can’t forget the way she made me feel.

The worst part wasn’t that Yujin had lied. It was that some part of Y/N believed her. Believed that maybe, just maybe, Karina deserved something better. Something easier.

The next evening, Y/N decided she couldn’t sit with her thoughts anymore. She needed to see Karina—to talk to her before the doubts consumed her entirely. She grabbed her jacket and left without even thinking to check the weather. The rain started halfway to Karina’s place, soaking through her clothes, but she didn’t care. She needed answers more than she needed to stay dry.

When Karina opened the door and saw Y/N standing there, dripping wet, her eyes immediately filled with concern. “Y/N? What are you doing here? You’re soaked!”

“I couldn’t stay home,” Y/N said, her voice barely steady as she stepped inside. “I’ve been going out of my mind, Karina. I need to talk to you.”

Karina shut the door behind her, worry etched into her face. “Of course. Come here.” She reached for Y/N’s arm, guiding her to the couch and wrapping a blanket around her shoulders. “You’re freezing.”

Y/N sat down but didn’t relax. Her eyes stayed fixed on the floor, her fingers clutching the blanket. “I thought I was okay after what happened with Yujin. I thought once she was out of the picture, things would go back to normal.” She paused, her voice dropping to a whisper. “But they haven’t.”

Karina sat beside her, her heart sinking at the pain in Y/N’s voice. “I know,” she admitted softly. “I feel it too.”

Y/N glanced at her, startled by the confession. “You do?”

Karina nodded, folding her hands together. “I thought if we just moved on, if we didn’t talk about it too much, things would fix themselves. But… I’ve been scared too. Yujin’s words got to me, Y/N. Not because I believed her, but because she made me realize how fragile this feels sometimes. I hate that she planted those doubts in your head. I hate that she made you question us.”

Y/N blinked back tears, her voice cracking. “She didn’t just plant doubts, Karina. She made me believe that I’m not enough for you. That one day, you’ll wake up and realize it’s easier to be with someone like her—someone who understands your world without needing you to explain it.”

Karina’s breath hitched. “No. Don’t say that. That’s not true, Y/N. It’s never been true.” She reached for Y/N’s hand, holding it tightly. “You’re not just enough for me—you’re everything to me. Do you hear me? Everything.”

“But what if I can’t shake it?” Y/N whispered, her eyes filled with uncertainty. “What if this feeling never goes away?”

Karina’s throat tightened, her eyes stinging with unshed tears. She cupped Y/N’s face, her touch firm yet tender. “Then we fight it. Together. Every day, if we have to. I don’t care how long it takes—I’m not letting you go because of something Yujin said.”

Y/N’s breath hitched as she leaned into Karina’s touch. “I want to believe that. I want us to be stronger, but it’s so hard. It feels like… like I’m constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop.”

Karina nodded slowly, her own fears surfacing. “I know. I feel that too sometimes. But we have to trust each other. We can’t let someone like Yujin take that from us. I love you, Y/N. I’m not going anywhere. I don’t care how messy or complicated this gets—we’ll figure it out.”

The words settled into Y/N’s chest, soothing but not erasing the ache completely. Still, they felt like a lifeline, something to hold onto in the storm. She nodded, swallowing hard. “Okay. No more pretending everything’s fine when it’s not. No more running from this.”

Karina smiled through her tears, pressing a soft kiss to Y/N’s forehead. “No more running.”

The rain continued to fall outside, the sound filling the quiet spaces between their words. They stayed wrapped in each other’s arms for a long time, the tension slowly ebbing away, replaced by something more fragile but no less real—hope.

It wouldn’t be easy. The wounds Yujin left wouldn’t heal overnight, and the shadows of doubt would linger for a while. But they were still here. Still holding on. Still fighting.

And for now, that was enough.

But deep down, they both knew this wasn’t the end of the storm. It was only the beginning of learning how to weather it together.

The following days were a delicate dance—filled with cautious words and fleeting touches that left Y/N feeling more disconnected from Karina than ever before. Even though they had agreed to face things together, there was an invisible wall between them, one neither dared to fully acknowledge yet.

Y/N spent most of her time at her own place, giving herself space to breathe, to think. But thinking only made things worse.

Trust her, Y/N reminded herself repeatedly. She loves you. She chose you.

Yet Yujin’s words had left a permanent scar on her thoughts, looping over and over like a haunting refrain.

The silence between texts grew longer. The once-effortless conversations felt forced, every word weighed down with unspoken tension. Y/N told herself it was just a phase, something they’d push through—but deep down, the doubt clawed at her.

It all came to a head one cold evening when Y/N found herself outside Karina’s apartment, heart racing and fingers trembling. She hadn’t planned to come—her feet had carried her there before her brain could catch up. I just need to see her, she thought. Maybe that’ll make it better.

Karina opened the door, surprised but smiling softly. “Hey. I wasn’t expecting you.”

“Hey,” Y/N replied, her voice tight. “I… I needed to see you.”

Karina stepped aside, letting her in. The warmth of the apartment contrasted sharply with the icy air outside, but it did little to ease Y/N’s nerves.

They stood there for a moment, the tension thick between them.

Karina broke the silence first. “Do you want some tea or something?”

Y/N shook her head. “No, I just… I need to talk to you.”

Karina nodded slowly, her expression shifting into something more serious. She gestured to the couch, and they both sat down, the space between them feeling vast despite the proximity.

“What’s on your mind?” Karina asked gently, but Y/N could see the worry in her eyes.

Y/N took a deep breath, forcing herself to meet Karina’s gaze. “I thought I was okay. I thought we could push past what happened with Yujin, but… I’m struggling. I hate admitting that, but it’s true.”

Karina’s brow furrowed. “I know. I’ve been feeling it too. But we’ll get through it, Y/N. We’ve already talked about this.”

“I know we talked about it,” Y/N said, her voice rising slightly. “But talking doesn’t magically make it go away. I still feel like I’m constantly second-guessing everything—every time you’re late to reply, every time you say you’re busy with work, I can’t help but wonder…”

“Wonder what?” Karina asked, her voice quieter now, almost trembling.

“If you’re having second thoughts,” Y/N whispered. “If she was right. If deep down, part of you realizes I’m not the right person for you.”

Karina’s face fell, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. “Y/N… no. That’s not true. How many times do I have to tell you that? I’m with you because I love you. Not her. Never her.”

“I want to believe that,” Y/N said, her voice cracking. “I really do. But you don’t know what it’s like to live with that voice in your head constantly telling you you’re not enough. And now, thanks to Yujin, that voice is louder than ever.”

Karina reached for Y/N’s hand, gripping it tightly. “Then let me help you silence that voice. You’re not in this alone, Y/N. You never have been.”

Y/N looked down at their intertwined hands, tears blurring her vision. “I’m scared, Karina. I’m scared this is going to break us. I’m scared I’ll never stop feeling like this.”

Karina’s voice shook with emotion as she spoke. “I’m scared too. But if we let that fear control us, we’re giving Yujin exactly what she wanted. We can’t let her win, Y/N. We can’t let her take away what we have.”

Y/N nodded, biting her lip to hold back a sob. “I just… I don’t know how to stop feeling this way.”

Karina leaned closer, her forehead resting against Y/N’s. “We’ll figure it out. Even if it takes time. Even if we stumble along the way. You’re worth it to me, Y/N. Every messy, complicated part of this is worth it.”

For the first time in days, Y/N felt a glimmer of hope pierce through the darkness. She wrapped her arms around Karina, holding onto her like she was the only thing keeping her grounded.

Karina’s fingers stroked her hair softly, her voice barely above a whisper. “We’re not perfect. But we don’t have to be. We just have to keep choosing each other. No matter how hard it gets.”

The tears finally spilled over as Y/N buried her face in Karina’s shoulder. It wasn’t a solution. It wasn’t an instant fix. But it was something—a promise to try, to fight for what they had, even when it felt impossible.

They stayed like that for a long time, tangled together on the couch as the city buzzed quietly outside the window.

It wasn’t the ending Y/N had hoped for. But it wasn’t an ending at all. It was just another step—painful, messy, but real.

And for now, that was enough.

[winisayswhat]

🔞 What do they find sexy about you ? 🔞PAC

This reading is in collaboration with my homegirl! @tarotbyjam24

Disclaimer: this is general reading . It may or may not resonate . If reading doesn't resonate let it fly and choose another pile or simply there were no messages for you through this reading 😊 Take the reading lightly as nothing's set in stone until you believe so 🕊️

MASTERLIST

PILE 1

<<READ BY @winisayswhat >>

Dayum gworl , you're so self aware lmaaooooo, it's giving IAM SEXY AND I KNOW IT SONG VIBE , This is the pile that host a private victorias secret ramp walk for themselves every night loll! You might wear some really sexy lingerie , decked uo with greatttt hair !

I see lots of libido from both the sides , you like being worshipped damn , you might wear some really good perfume . Your future spouse just wants to merge his body with yours cause you look so damn alluring , you are giving 'Queen of heaven " vibes , the might go gaga over your melons and cherries , they will suck them like a ripe fruit , it'll be like a baby sucking desperately in their mums buds ! You are the prize gosh you're SO SEXY ! Some bondage or blindfold might be involved , you guyssss loveeeeeee foreplay ! Your spouse will never get enough of you, you somehow always manage to make their buddy erect , also omg your man will grunt and moan alot as you do the deed , they'll grip your dips tightly while leaving love bites and marks all over you, you'll whimper under their touch ! I see you having many orgasms , and the look you have while having orgasms turns on your man for a second round ! Your man will know how to do foreplay and turn you on, the type of man who'll worship the ground you walk on ! There might also be oral sex involved , your man might also be mighty bulky with beard , and you're a damsel in distress with a small frame compared to them ! Some kind of kink there ahhahaah!

If you liked the reading please don't forget to tip me on kofi , and please leave a ' 💗' on kofi so that I know tip is mine as me and @tarotbyjam24 share same KOFI account .

PILE 2

<<READ BY @winisayswhat >>

I'm seeing a DEEP attraction between you and your future spouse. They're like sooo drawn to your SPONTANEOUS nature, your ability to light up the room with your presence and aura. Your warmth and energy are like a MAGNET, pulling them in and making them feel alive.You might be a virgin or atleats less experienced than them !

It's giving *i am gonna be your first and last one *

They loveeee your personality, they look at you like a baby

with sparkly personality that's got them hooked. They're als attracted to your INTELLIGENCE, your creativity, and your passions. They admire your strength, your resilience, and your leadership qualities. You're a TRUE BOSS, and they can't get enough of that.

And let's talk about the chemistry between you two. It's like the universe itself is conspiring to bring you together. They feel a deep sense of trululu lmao and destiny when they're with you, like they've finally found their missing piece.Theyre gonna to be the one to initiate the deed , the type of guy who might like the thrill of teasing a girl who isn't often teased , you might get shy or freeze when they initiate proximity, they might like the view from behind 😉, when you bend or are doing house chores . If you're a working woman, you being focused and ignorant will piss them off! They'll do anything and everything to gain your attention. You might have a greatttttttt cleavage and lips, your eyes maybe very doe types , like an invitation for your spouse to *ahem ahem *. They love it when you're unaware about how hot you look ! It's like you're not being braggy about it .

They'll like to hold and grab your waist time to time , in bed they live when you ride them, they're gonna be so intense ,gosh don't get me started , you get them possessed during the deed , your body and eyes make them go gaga , they love it when they make you loose control . The way your lips part , the shivers during orgasm , your eyebrows cocked, eyes half closed rolling back wanting to stop yet asking for more ! Gosh it's like badboy x innocent girl trope !

If you liked the reading please don't forget to tip me on kofi , and please leave a ' 💗' on kofi so that I know tip is mine as me and @tarotbyjam24 share same KOFI account .

PILE 3

<<READ BY @tarotbyjam24 >>

They find your silhouette sexy . They like your named body specially in the night light or like fairy lights . They find it sexy when you do some chores or work in body hugging tight dresses or suits . They may also find your love handles sexy like their hands will perfectly fit on your love handles. They find your open hairs sexy . They may also find you sexy when you act like hard to catch bird or when you get mad at them they gonna find it sexy . They gonna find it sexy when your cum flows out or just when your salivas mix with eachothers . They ofcourse gonna find sexual connection find you super attractive . They may also find it sexy when you let the intimacy build between eachother . They may also find sext when you let them dominate probably they have capricorn placements. Also this connection isn't just physical sexual intimacy it's far more stronger than that a soul level deep connection guided by divine.

If you liked the reading please don't forget to tip me on kofi , and please leave a '🖤' on kofi so that I know tip is mine as me and @winisayswhat share same KOFI account .

Pile 4

<<READ BY @tarotbyjam24 >>

I feel they find your curves sexy like the way you sit on couch the pillow position that makes you comfortable in while sitting. They may like to notice small details about you . They over all find your physical beauty sexy your hairs , your lips and lipstick on it , your eyes , your eyelashes. They're so in love with your beauty . They also find your dressing sense sexy . Like how your body fits perfect in the dresses you wear and how they make your curves highlight. They find your introvertness sexy . They find it sexy when you speak less and act like a old monk . They find it sexy when you act like old soul. You could be probably a old school typa lover or they could be like that too . They find it sexy when you give them advices on their important matters . They like to add your 2 cents too . They may also find it sexy when you're all covered up in those furry hooded dresses or like bear dresses thingy . They also find your dense nature sexy . They may also find it sexy when you get cold like it's their chance to make love or just cuddle with you .

If you liked the reading please don't forget to tip me on kofi , and please leave a '🖤' on kofi so that I know tip is mine as me and @winisayswhat share same KOFI account .

I provide paid readings

[weirdgenetic-fuckup]

Current James seducing a younger+naive reader? Lying to her that he’ll pull out but instead filling her up? Of course after a few months she ends up pregnant and she’s scared but that was his plan all along?

A/n: I wrote a good chunk of this story and then my computer glitched and I FUCKING LOST IT I'm losing my mind :D

Warnings: smut, daddy kink, size kink, belly bulge, age gap, breeding kink, mirror sex, dubious consent, if you think I missed anything let me know otherwise enjoy!

You were part of the crew for the 72 Seasons tour, mostly just running errands for the rest of the crew but occasionally you'd get jobs straight from the band.

James saw you around and thought you were cute, young and innocent, perfect for him, so he made it his mission to talk to you as much as possible; at the airport, on bus rides, backstage, wherever he could find you.

This continued after the tour, he got your number and used it regularly to see how you were doing, inviting you over for dinners, cooking and cleaning while he was on call with you.

It was on one of your dinners that he planned to finish what he'd started.

"Sorry for the late notice, I wasn't planning on dinner." He said to you over the phone, leaning back into the seat of his car as he drove up the highway on one of his drives. "I just had a bad day, you know? Dealing with Lars... I just want to see you, sweetheart." He said, knowing the petname made your knees weak.

"I'll be there soon, Jamie, just let me get ready." You responded, already closing the app you were ordering dinner from.

"I'm sure you'll look pretty no matter what you've got on." He said, grin widening. "Especially if you've got nothing on." Your brain short-circuited at that and he laughed at your silence. "I'll get dinner started before you get here." He ended the call with a dorky kiss, something you were used to from him.

It was late, which was exactly what he wanted. There wasn't a practice, no plans for a new album, there was nothing. James spent all day at home just waiting for the perfect chance to talk to you.

Everything went as usual, you talked and laughed and ate and when it was time to clean the dishes James acted like he hadn't even considered how late it would be when it was time for you to head home.

"Why don't you just stay here?" He offered. "It's too late to drive, just stay the night."

You thought it over in your head, it was late, you didn't feel like driving. You took James up on his offer and let him lead you through the maze of a house he had to a room once you were done with the dishes.

He'd given you a tour of his house before but it was huge and you always got lost, the only rooms you knew were the kitchen, the bathroom nearest to it, and the living room, though you didn't spend much time there. You didn't think twice when James showed you to his room, you didn't know it was his.

The door closed behind him and his lips were on yours in an instant, hands roaming your body, mentally mapping out every curve of your figure while pulling you out of your clothes until you were left in just your underwear in front of him.

He tugged at the lacey band of your panties. "Who were you wearing these for, sweetheart?" He let go of the strap and it snapped back to your skin, making you jump. "Just wanted to feel pretty under your clothes?"

You bit your lip as he spoke to you, looking down at you with a dark lust swirling in his eyes.

Without a response he led you further into the room. You stood in front of the mirrored closet doors, saw how James towered over you, how his hands held your hips. "I'm gonna ruin you, sweetheart." He leaned down, lips caressing the shell of your ear as he whispered. "And you're gonna watch, and you're gonna love every fucking second of it, isn't that right?"

You nodded, thighs pressing together. "Yes, Jamie, of-of course." He chuckled at your eagerness, the shine in your eyes evident.

"Keep that energy, sweetheart, and I'll give you anything you want." He said as he pulled his shirt over his head. You'd seen him shirtless before, he often showed you his tattoos and muscles, he liked showing off and you indulged his habits.

His jeans followed shortly afterwards and his boxers didn't stay for long. He was eager to be inside you.

He pushed his hard cock against your ass, calloused hands on your waist. "Take them off for me." He said, looking over you in the mirror.

You reached behind your back and unclipped your bra, letting the straps fall limply off your shoulders and to the ground before pushing your panties down to your ankles and kicking them off, leaving you just as naked as he was.

His arms wrapped around you, holding you tight to him. One arm went over your chest while the other went to your stomach, hand moving lower and his fingers slipped between your folds.

James groaned, feeling how wet you were already. He slipped a finger into you with ease. You gasped as he did so, back arching. "Oh, you're naughty." He said, danger in his voice. "Already played with yourself earlier, didn't you?" You swallowed thickly and gave a small nod. "Just couldn't wait, could you?"

You shook your head. "I-I'm sorry, Jamie, every-every time I come over I have to." You looked at him through the mirror, a pout tugging at your lips as you did. "I just think about you and I-I can't help myself." You rambled, thighs pressing together again around his hand.

"Got yourself all prepped for daddy." He mused, kissing your cheek and moving down to your neck. "Such a good little thing." He pulled his finger out of you and brought his hand to his cock, giving it a few good pumps. "Just stay pretty for daddy while he fucks you, yeah?" You nodded eagerly, pushing your hips back on him.

James pushed his tip through your folds, gathering your wetness before pushing into you and bottoming out with one thrust. You moaned loudly, knees buckling at the stretch but James held you up right.

He brought his hand back to your hip, holding you in place while he gave you time to adjust. "Fuck, you're so tight." He groaned, looking over you in the mirror again, the slight bulge that formed in your stomach from his cock.

He pulled back only to slam back into you, drawing another moan from you. His eyes never left the bump in your gut, watching it come and go with every thrust. His hold on your hips tightened as his thrusts got faster and harsher, all to see you come undone at his hands.

"That's it, sweetheart, don't take your eyes off the mirror." He cooed, resting his chin on your shoulder, guiding your gaze to the mirror in front of you so you could see the way your body jolted with every buck of his hips, the way your face morphed in pleasure. "Such a perfect little thing for daddy." He mused.

You were clenching around his pulsing cock, aching for release. A realization dawned on you and your eyes widened. "Condom!" You said, grabbing at his arm over your chest. "We-we need a-agh, oh god, a-a condom."

James huffed, irritation slipping into his mind at your worry. "Don't worry about that, just relax." He said, lips going back to your neck.

"Jamie, we-we need a condom, what if-!"

"I'll pull out, alright?" He bit, turning your head with his hand so he could shut you up with a kiss. His other hand, the one on your hip, went back to your cunt, this time to rub your clit and snap the knot building in your gut.

You'd been waiting for James since the start of the tour, when he first talked to you. He was much older, you figured it would never happen, he saw you as a daughter that's why he called you sweetheart, why he always tried to cook for you and take care of you, why he wanted you close. That's what you told yourself, there was no way he was into you, it was all in your head.

He was buried deep inside you, groans becoming more frequent as he neared his own high while you rode out your own around his cock. Your eyes were glazed over, lips parted in a soft 'oh', you'd have no idea if he came inside you now.

He buried his face in the crook of your neck as he came, abdomen tightening with the last few thrusts to push his seed deep in you.

He turned you around, pushing right back into you the second he could to keep his cum in you to marinate. James carried you to the bathroom and set you down on the counter, your legs wrapped around his hips as he used a cloth to wipe you down, using warm water to clean the thin layer of sweat off your body.

It was late, you were tired, your body was tired, you fell asleep in his arms with his cock in you before he even finished cleaning up. It was perfect in his mind, he could carry you to bed and let you fall asleep on of him without worrying about you trying to get off him.

You stuck with him for a while after that, finally getting the relationship you wanted. James let you keep some things at his place, you weren't spending much time at your apartment anymore anyway so most of your clothes ended up there, not that you wore them in the house, usually opting for James's clothes.

James was sitting in bed, going through something on his phone when you hesitantly came out of the bathroom and crawled in next to him.

He wrapped his arm around you and pulled you tighter to his side. "What is it?" He asked, a smile already forming on his face. He knew what you were going to tell him.

Your hand trembled as you handed him a positive pregnancy test.

[strangedesired]

Bruce doesn’t know what to get Clark for Valentine’s Day so he just buys literally everything. Clark comes home to at least 100 gifts wrapped and scattered around his apartment, and they’re not cheap either. Jewelry of all kinds with every stone you can think of, real leather shoes and belts, silk ties, satin pajamas, every luxury item that exists is now owned by Clark Kent.

When he discovers all this, Clark peers through each package, unwilling to unwrap them all because he knows for a fact he’s not keeping them. He looked through them all, smiling widely at the fact that Bruce so clearly picked them all out very specifically. His favorite color blue, his birthstone, that shade of red that Bruce says flatters his skin tone, all of it is carefully tailored to Clark. The last present is different, though. It’s a necklace, the chain is shining silver and obviously new, but the pendant, a heart shaped locket, is clearly very old. It’s rusted a little at the hinge and the metal is dented. On the front is an ornate ‘B’. He moves to it, immediately carefully unwrapping the box and pulling out the locket. He wanted to open it to discover what’s inside, instead of just looking into it. When he cracks it open, his throat goes dry. Inside is two pictures, one is of Bruce and his parents, the same one hanging in the manor, and the other is a close up of Clark and Dick from the time Dick fell asleep during a piggy back ride, face smushed into Clark’s shoulder and a little drool on his cheek.

30 seconds later, Clark is standing in Bruce’s bedroom at the manor, hair wild from how fast he flew and civilian clothes still in place. Bruce has a hand over his heart, having whirled around from where he was standing over his dresser, “Jesus, Clark, a little warning, please.” Clark ignores that comment, rushing forward and grabbing Bruce’s face before he clashes their lips together, kissing Bruce as deeply as he can until Bruce has to push him away to get a breath. When they separate, Bruce is bright red, eyes blown wide and fidgeting with his hands, his gaze has already locked on the necklace around Clark’s throat. He clears his throat, “So, you like it then? I didn’t know if you would think it was weird to have a picture of my parents but they gave it to me all those years ago and it felt wrong to take their picture out but I wanted you to have this piece of me and for you to know that you are my family but if you don’t want it that’s okay no hard feelings I’ll just-“ Clark is kissing him again, softer now, hands gentle on Bruce’s cheeks. “I love it, baby. It’s perfect. Thank you.”

[chrollohearttags]

nobody knows • portgas d. ace

another drabble for sneaky link/ex boyfriend ace bc I have one functioning brain cell and all of it is focused on him atm teehee 🤭

wc: 1.8K

more infidelity (y’all both still AIN’T SHIT 😭 reader got that dog in her I’m sorry), straight porn, modern au, black fem reader, phone sex/sexting, squirting, oral sex, calls reader bitch, a eating + anal, recording, backshots, rough sex, heavy breeding, idk what else will come out

he’s so ooc in this and I don’t give a fuck (I’m ovulating and stressed w life + therapy is too expensive)

═✿══╡°˖✧✿✧˖°╞══✿═══✿══╡°˖✧✿✧˖°╞══✿══

nobody knows why you and ex-boyfriend!ace broke up in the first place. Honestly, it seemed like such a waste…three long years down the drain with nothing to show for it but the two of you left in shambles. Friends and family consoling you both as you learned to navigate life without one another. (Y/N), moving on fairly quickly with the son of one of your dad’s friends..a byproduct of military nepotism and the very antithesis to what Ace was. A stiff working a cushy desk job and reaping the benefits..pushing papers and always playing it safe. He was very kind, sweet and damn near ideal in every sense of the word. Not too much of a drinker, a partygoer or anything of the sort but he always took you on dates. All of your girlfriends liked him well enough, thinking that he more matched your speed than the thrill seeking, goofy, chaotic daredevil that was ex-boyfriend!ace. Who rode motorcycles and climbed mountains in his spare time, when he wasn’t holding life by the tips of his fingers as an EMT. Covered in tattoos, he looked like such a quintessential, stereotypical ‘bad boy’… “God, (y/n). I don’t know what you ever saw in that guy. He’s a loser, through and through.”

However, what nobody knows..is that you never truly left him alone! He was your ideal match and you couldn’t shake it. You could actually laugh, joke and make mistakes with him. There was no need for faux perfection and lies. You saw each other for who you really were.

Nobody knows that while you’re at work, he’s constantly sending you filthy messages to get you aroused and worked up. Making you chew your lip and the tip of your pen as you twirl in your chair..reading how he’s going to make sure you feel it in your stomach the next time you two link. Nobody knows he shamelessly sends you nut videos, uttering your name with the sexiest moans. Nobody knows that when you tell your assistant that the hour where you refuse any meetings is designated for you to choke on ex-boyfriend!ace’s cock in your cute little business attire..loving the way those glasses hang off the tip of your nose as he pushes your forehead to his pelvis.

“Goddamn, babe..I knew I couldn’t quit you..you’re eating my dick up so good.”

“It’d taste even better if you let me come on it first.”

loving that you were willing to abandon all of your morals for him so easily. Nobody knows about the second phone you keep stashed away in your glovebox just to call him late at night when your new man is sleeping or working overnight and you want some company..

“Can you please come over? I miss you..he won’t be back tonight. I promise.”

“Of course, baby. Anything for you..I’ll always come running when you tell me.”

or in need of a good orgasm because that dummy couldn’t give you one if you handed him a roadmap to the clit! With ex-boyfriend!ace on the other line talking you through it with that deep voice and lewd commands.

“Oh my gosh, pretty girl. Did you call me just so you could touch yourself to the sound of my voice? You’re so cute..” making you FaceTime him because he wants to see the mess he helped create.

nobody knows that whilst you're out at dinner with your new man, alongside loved ones as he boasts about how he knows you’re the one and how you guys make such a lovely couple, (y/n) is daydreaming about ex-boyfriend!ace riding you on the back of his Suzuki through the city, knowing the rush gets you turned on. That rather than dealing with an insecure little boy who felt intimidated by your looks and success, ex-boyfriend!ace would go drinking and partying with you, loving when you showed off your body because he wasn't worried about another man taking what was his. Nobody knows that you have a small tattoo of ex-boyfriend!ace’s name right above your private area. Hell, it's not as if your new man touched you enough to notice and when he did, the lights remained off.

When your girlfriends are divulging the dirt about their relationships and how envious they are of you. Claiming that you hit the jackpot with such a structured, well mannered guy who works a high paying job and always comes home to you. But what nobody knows…is that he could never replace the man you truly love. So much so, when you kiss him on the cheek that Friday evening before heading to the ‘airport’ for another business trip..you’re secretly meeting ex-boyfriend!ace in the top floor suite at a luxury hotel hours away from home where you two go every month to fuck each other's brains out for three days straight. Akin to addicts who can’t be satisfied, you rabidly devour one another until your bodies quit.

“I’ve waited all week for this…I’m so not sorry for how I’m about to fuck you.” ”I wouldn’t expect anything less.” Wrapping his hands around your throat, shoving his tongue into your mouth as he corners you against a wall. Nobody knows that ex!boyfriend!ace has you face down on a mattress with your ass up in the air as his tongue explores both of your entrances. Practically seating you on his face to suction around that clit, flicking his tongue in and out of your tight cunt before prodding your asshole, leaving a sloppy trail of saliva on each of them. Because you wore that adorable little heart shaped plug to help prep you for the weekend.

“You taste so fucking good…especially when I know you’ll let me have it anytime I want.”

nobody knows that you’re somewhere gripping the sheets for dear life as ex-boyfriend!ace delivers the most insane backshots you’ve ever felt. Those perfectly round, thick cheeks ricocheting off of his lower half..the contrast in your skin and that pearlescent scream surrounding his shaft making the sight even better…ripping orgasms from your body with no shame because he deserves it. After all, you belong to him.

“That’s right..come on this dick, bitch. Give me what I want..” he still loves and respects you all the same. But ace knows you prefer rough, degrading sex far more than the mundane and vanilla. Especially when it was in short supply with your current situation. Even going as far as to place a foot on your head, tugging your arms behind your back so that he can really bury his cock inside of you.

“Yes! Keep fucking meeee, just like that, daddy. ‘S so good!”

“You love when I dig you out like this, treating you like a little slut..’swear this pussy’s going to get me in some serious trouble one day. But I don’t care, I love you.”

rambling on as he feels you twitching around him for the third time, leaving splatters of warm juices each time; squirting immensely from the constant stimulation to your spot.

“Damn, you’re coming so hard, pretty girl. Is he not fucking you right?” Laughing before he could even get the very rhetorical question from his mouth. Leaning down to place a trail of pecks and licks on your spine to console you before placing you into a prone position. ”Of course not..nobody knows this body better than me. Isn’t that right, gorgeous?” All but confirmed by the way you’re tightening around him..he can’t help but to grip your throat and steal sloppy kisses from you whilst he drills you into the mattress. “Nooo, babyyy. You’re the only one who can fuck me this good..oh my Goddd—“ placing his camera in your face so that he could have it for safekeeping..(and in case he gets wind of your man running his mouth about him again!) Making you call his name and scream it to the heavens. “Aceeee, fuck meeee..”

Nobody knows that you’ve been fucking for damn near an hour while your phone buzzes with missed calls and texts from your boyfriend and whatever little girl he’s deciding to entertain for the moment. As heinous as it was, you were just filling the void and you’d always find your way back to each other. Perhaps it was the thrill of sneaking around that kept this charade going. Either way, you weren’t giving each other for a long time and it’s so obvious why..no one else will do the freaky shit that you both crave so much.

“Oh my gosh, I can’t believe you’re letting me fuck your ass again..feels amazing.” glaring up at him with the most adoring gaze in your eyes and smile on your face as you proudly hold a vibrator to your clit..allowing him to stretch that opposite opening. Practically coming on spot when you began to show your gratitude for this pleasure…

“Thank you, daddy..using all my holes like this. I love it so much.” That much apparent by the tears pouring down your face alongside that toothy grin. Only he could give it to you so good, you begin to cry!

“Oh shit..of course, gorgeous girl. I’d do anything for you..anything to see my baby smile.” Including pinning you down by your throat and letting trails of saliva drip into your mouth. Even feeding you a couple slaps when you all but pleaded with him to treat you like an object.

nobody knows that on the sparse occasions when you have sex with your current man, he’s forced to wear a condom because you’ve discussed several times that you don’t want children and you’re not taking any risks. But ex-boyfriend!ace gets the privilege of feeling that hard cock sliding in and out of you raw..and to breed you as many times as he can muster! Letting load after load spill into your aching womb. Filling every hole with that dripping seed.

“You look so pretty stuffed with my cum, sweetheart. Just how I like it.”

nobody knows why you left ex-boyfriend!ace in the first place but you knew why you’d always come running back!

@violetxxvenom @shamelesshoefairy @lwop-kpop

[syndrossi]

It started funny, then went a bit contemplative, as I often do...

x~x~x

The second time Aegon spilled his wine cup, this time in his haste to pass Aemma the butter she had asked for, she shot Rhaella a look from across the table. Aemond hadn’t spilled yet, but he seemed to have made supper a competition with his brother yet again, offering her sister portions of every nearby dish—including those that were well within her reach.

Rhaella’s patience was impressive. Aemma didn’t think she could have repeated variations on “no, thank you” more than twice without her irritation beginning to show.

“I trust the ride back from Runestone was pleasant?” Aegon asked.

The wine had been sopped up by the servant who had swooped in before it could spill over the edge of the table, and he seemed to have recovered his dignity—not that he had much to begin with.

“Runestone was pleasant,” Aemma said, already missing it. Being welcomed by the chaos and stink of King’s Landing had made her want to turn Shadow around and fly right back, but her father still had a love of it and she did not want to deny him his home.

“I could fly there,” Aegon said eagerly. “You and Rhaella must meet Sunfyre.”

The last part was spoken particularly loudly, and Aemond’s head turned in his brother’s direction, mouth drawing into a scowl. With Aegon having claimed his dragon while they were in Runestone, and Helaena two years before, Aemond and Daeron were the two siblings left without.

Aemma made the appropriate noises of interest, gazing morosely down at her plate. It would be a long supper, she knew, and with Rhaella entertaining Aemond and their father embroiled in conversation with the king—though he glanced at them occasionally—her fate was most assuredly sealed.

x~x~x

There was no escaping their cousins, Aemma soon found to her dismay. Gone were the pleasant, quiet suppers with their father in their apartments within the holdfast. When they were not supping with Princess Rhaenyra and her sons, they were forced to attend the king’s table. Only when they arrived early could she and Rhaella seat themselves as best they could to avoid being trapped. Often that meant suffering the queen’s presence, but at least they had Helaena to talk with.

At the yard, their archery was constantly interrupted—and not merely by their cousins. Squires crowded the range, seeking to distract or on occasion embarrass themselves trying to match their skill. On those days, their cousins were like jealous terriers, yapping at the other boys.

“How could they possibly know that we’ve flowered?” Aemma complained afterward, in the refuge that their apartments had become.

“It is more that we have breasts now,” Rhaella said, glancing down at the small swell of her bosom. “And we are not yet formally betrothed, yet we are nearing the age where such arrangements are made.”

Aemma had done her best thus far to avoid thinking about the messy business of matches. In her life before, it had only just become relevant once the Others had been defeated, when Dany had begun hinting that as her heir, Jon would be expected to make an appropriate match, but there had still been battles to win.

Now, she had Runestone, and the boys tripping over one another for her favor were second and third sons with ambitions of ruling Runestone themselves. In some ways, their mother had been extraordinarily lucky that their father could not stand Runestone. She had been left alone to rule in peace.

It was not that Aemma didn’t want a family someday. But there were a great many problems to solve first, and having to nurse the ego of a slighted husband while doing so did not appeal.

“Who would you want to marry, if you had your pick?”

Her sister’s eyes held that calm intensity that often served as a balm when Aemma was working herself into a frenzy. She halted her pacing and tried to give the question the consideration it deserved.

“Certainly not our cousins,” she said.

Aegon was unbearably self-centered and even worse, lazy. Back when she had been his age and boy, she had made the mistake of drinking too much sweet wine, but it was a daily occurrence with Aegon. He is constantly indulged by his flock of admirers, and he has embraced such indulgences.

Aemond was no better a prospect, prone to jealousy and rage, though at least he applied himself. Aemma was the match that Otto Hightower desired for him—she knew that much from overhearing their father’s furious argument with the king a few years ago. To his credit, Aemond seemed to admire their martial pursuits, rather than view them as a flaw, but that was as much as she was willing to concede.

Rhaenyra’s sons were less abhorrent, but they still seemed so young. She knew that three or four years was not a huge gap, especially not when they were older, but ten-year-old Jace was very much a child still. And she knew that Rhaenyra dearly wanted Rhaella for him.

“I do not know,” Aemma said, flopping back onto their bed, muddy boots and all. “Perhaps I can follow our mother’s example and not wed until I am an old maid.”

At least at twenty-two her rule would be well-established and she would have those years to focus on the looming succession crisis—and the distant threat in Volantis.

“What of you?” she asked, craning her neck to look at Rhaella.

Her sister frowned, the expression absurdly beautiful. Rather than make her look sullen, it lent her an air of melancholy. Aemma did not know why the suitors were so evenly split between them when they had Rhaella to sigh over.

“Jace would be a kind husband,” her sister said.

“But?” Aemma prompted, bringing in her knees so that she could unlace her boots.

Rhaella shook her head, her stare at the bed far-away. “When you are queen—your life is not your own. Your body is not your own.”

Aemma’s namesake had been butchered for the potential heir in her belly. And Rhaella’s had been beaten and locked away, forced to carry half a dozen children who would never see their first year, only to die birthing her final child at Dragonstone.

Rhaella’s shrug was almost despondent. “I would like to marry someone like Daemon, I suppose.”

Aemma understood what she meant—someone who would love her. Who would go to war for her. As Rhaegar warred for Lyanna? Aemma blinked the thought away, the reverse parallels too dizzying to entertain for more than a second.

“You do not have to marry,” Aemma said. “You can stay with me at Runestone.”

Rhaella leaned in to kiss her on the temple, pulling back with a wry smile. “I believe that is Aemond’s fantasy. Except that we are both his wives.”

They both pulled a face, and Aemma swung back into a sitting position. “I simply wish to be able to use the training yard without being besieged by admirers.”

Rhaella’s smile turned devious. “There is a way.”

Aemma raised a brow.

“We invite our father to train with us.”

“I don’t wish them dead,” Aemma protested, but she had to admit that the notion had its appeals.

“A mere maiming should serve as ample deterrence,” Rhaella said serenely.

[pepshee]

Push & Pull

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ ✦ ‧₊˚ ⋅

Pairing - toxic!heeseung x fem!reader

Summary - When Lee Heeseung, the campus it boy decides to take on a new girl expecting to just hookup and move on, but he didn't know that it would be more than a one night stand.

Warnings - idk how to write fics erm, my first fic, making out, drinking, frat parties, heeseung is a player, mentions of the other enha members, mentions of other idols no written smut but sex is implied (it didnt really fit the story to write smut sorry </3), fwb/situationship dynamic, lmk if i missed something !

Word count - 7.3k

A/N: hii so this is my first time writing fanfiction like ever.. I've been using tumblr for not that long but I have been reading fics for years on other platforms! idk if anyone actually reads these but i'm really sorry for any errors or especially grammar issues that occur in this fic. I tried my best, i'm aware it's not great but please leave me recommendations! also this fic is based off of a c.ai bot I wrote, the bot is a bit different tho, my c.ai is @/hee2eung if you want to check it out! Have fun reading! also I used Grammarly for half of this fic for some assistance but then I stopped bc it was starting to look like it was ai generated and I wanted it to seem more authentic yk

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻ੈ✩‧₊˚

Being in your second year of college hasn’t been particularly difficult, although stressful; you’ve managed to balance your social life and school. Throughout your life, you’ve loved the ocean and marine animals, so you decided to major in marine biology. The university you go to is very expensive and prestigious—so imagine high school, senior year, getting a letter in the mail offering you a full ride to Kyung Hee University—you love this university due to the fact they had recently funded new majors. 

Originally they hadn’t offered marine biology, but luckily they had added it while you were still a junior in high school, which is why you decided to apply the following year. They even had funded hands-on programs to engage students and help them learn better than just using pen and paper, or in today's world, keyboard and mouse. Implementing an on-campus aquarium was by far the most beneficial to them; although expensive, they somehow managed it. Is it ethical? Who knows. What matters is the fact it’s there, and they do have on-site professionals to properly take care of the animals.

Managing the aquarium is by far your favorite part; hell, they even let you name one of the three seals. Being still a bit immature, you went with bubbles. Anyone on campus was able to visit the aquarium during the daytime. 

On this particular day, it was your day to take care of the seals and manage the aquarium. You had just finished feeding the small fish and the jellyfish. The only semi-large animal at the aquarium is the seal; everything else consists of small fish, jellyfish, and coral. You had gotten to the seals, grabbing a bucket of fish before walking through the staff door and going over to the seal pool. However, you hadn’t expected the campus it boy Lee Heeseung and his goons, who follow his every move, to show up.

Lee Heeseung.. Where do you even start? Everyone loves him. He's a part of the schools’ basketball team although, surprisingly enough, he’s actually a music major. You hadn’t had the chance to hear him sing, but from what you've heard it's angelic like he was heaven-sent. You wished that was all there was to him, but like many others, that wish quickly died. His reputation is mixed. It's never really clear if he's a good guy, or if he's like the boys from your high school.

As for his minions—Yang Jungwon, Park Jongseong AKA Jay, Sim Jaeyun AKA Jake, Park Sunghoon, Kim Sunoo, and Nishimura Riki—They're pretty much Heeseung, but with their own little twist. They love to follow his every move. It's not like he's using them, not at all, those are his best friends. They never say it but you can tell they'd kill for each other. Heeseung is the oldest among them.

Occasionally you’ve seen the seven of them behind the school smoking some cigarettes, weed, or drinking alcohol. They're all 21-23, so they're all of age except they know with your university strict rules because it's a private school if they got caught they'd be in mass amounts of trouble with the dean. 

They’re all rich, matter of fact, 90% of the student body is rich. Which makes sense when you take into account the obvious extreme tuition. You, on the other hand, are not rich. Your middle-class family didn't even want you applying to Kyung Hee because they knew if you had gotten accepted without a scholarship you wouldn't be able to go. They didn't want you to be disappointed, but luckily that disappointment never came.

The seven boys knew smoking and drinking while on campus was a heavy risk, but they didn't care. They figured since their families are rich they could just pay off the dean like they've done time and time again.

You're brought out of your thoughts when you get splashed a little by bubbles. But now you're once again wondering why Heeseung and his six friends had come to the aquarium.

They had never come to the aquarium, they never even appeared at school events that weren’t sports-related. You decide to ignore it for now and proceed to feed the seals. There were a few lingering visitors that weren’t Heeseung. You made the seals do a couple of tricks sometimes.

Except while doing this, you noticed Heeseung’s lingering gaze on you, his expression stone cold. You had no clue what he was thinking… That is until you overhear him talking to his friends. 

 “This is what they spent so much money on?” He asked his friend, Jake, in a more neutral tone. He was so hard to read, it ate you up inside. “Yeah, I think it’s kind of nice actually,” Jake responded; he thankfully is easy to read, unlike his best friend. 

“Hey, say, who’s the girl feeding the seals?” His expressionless face now gained a slight smirk; it seemed like he was planning something.

“Why? Are you interested?” Sunghoon responds clearly, teasing him; you can tell by the grin he’s wearing. 

“Just look at her; she seems innocent,” Heeseung's smirk growing even larger now.

After the first couple of seconds of their conversation, you stopped listening; instead, you focused on finishing feeding the seals. 

After the bucket was emptied, you put it back and left the seal pool. You wash your hands, trying your best to rid them of the fishy smell—though not very successfully, at least your hands are clean and no longer slimy—you go into the back and grab your things. You head out of the staff area, and you’re about to leave; that is until… 

“Princess” You stop in your tracks as your heart immediately starts speeding up. The voice is one you know all too well, one everyone on campus knows. Did Lee Heeseung just call you princess? Slowly you turn your head to look at him.

“Do you need something?” You try your best to hide the shakiness in your voice, to which you fail.

“What's your name?” There's an unmistakable almost mocking expression in his voice. You never thought you'd be face-to-face with Heeseung and his 6 minions.

“It's Kim Y/N” You managed to keep your voice steady even though you were quite nervous.

“Haven't really seen you around before, you must like the seals don't you?” He asked you, you can tell he doesn't care about what your answer will be, but you fall deeper into his alluring facade.

You've heard all the rumors flying around campus, how Heeseung is a player, but then one that immediately contradicts that one saying he’s an angel and he can genuinely hold a relationship. 

It's so hard to tell what's real and what's not anymore when it comes to Heeseung. 

“Uhh, yeah I do like the seals, they’re really cute aren't they?” Usually, you'd be really excited to talk about the seals you adore so much, and your usual bubbly personality always makes people love you. This time however, your excitement is on pause.

“They are quite cute, now, Y/N; have you been to a frat party before?” He leans down getting closer to you.

“I went to one last year when I was a freshman and I hated it so I never went back.” Thinking of the first and last time you went to a frat party is like a nightmare.. You thought it would've been somewhat like the movies, but it was much, much worse. Nobody told you the amount of dirt, vomit, and unidentifiable substances you'd come across. Not to mention the fact a guy was all over you and wouldn't leave you alone until your best friend Julie threatened him. Where would you be without Julie? You have no clue, but you know it's nowhere pleasant. 

“Aww how disappointing, well good thing none of us are in a frat, so the party my boy Riki is throwing at his place isn't a frat party. He has a big ass house, you should come princess. I’ll make sure whatever happened at that frat party doesn't happen again, trust me,” Surprisingly, this time, it was said softly, different from the way he spoke before. 

“How can you guarantee that? You don't even know what happened last time,” 

“I don't have to know, all I know is that it won't happen again. Be there, meet at the fountain on Saturday, 6 PM. We’ll take you to Riki's house,” You thought about his offer. What if it’s different this time? Heeseung wouldn’t make an empty promise would he? Should I ask my friends for advice? Before you could even get an answer to any of those inner thoughts, you even surprise yourself with the answer you shot out. “Sure, I guess I’ll go.”

“Perfect,” he muttered, now standing back up and no longer leaning toward you. 

“We’ll see you there,” you didn’t expect Jake to say something, or any of his friends to say something to you. Before you can even comprehend the interaction fully, the seven are already walking off.

You sigh and check your phone seeing the time 2:37 displayed on the small screen in your device. Shit. You forgot you were supposed to meet up with your friends Julie, Karina, and Jennie at the campus café—which is student-run—to study and of course, gossip. You all had agreed to me at 2:30, meaning you're 7 minutes late. Now you have to rush across campus… god that damn Lee Heeseung. 

────୨ৎ────

Finally arriving at the café, you spot your friends sitting at a table and quickly go to join them.

“Look who finally decided to show up,” Karina teased

“Jesus did you run here?” Julie laughs out, You take a moment to catch your breath before responding “I mean.. Maybe a little? I’m so sorry I got caught up talking with someone I just—”

“Y/N, it's fine we were only joking! Go order your drink and have a seat. Lucky for you we were waiting for you to get here before we started gossiping,” Jennie interrupts, letting out a small chuckle at your out-of-breath look.

“Right..” You breathe out, setting down your bag walking up to the front counter to order a drink. There's so many drink options but you always seem to order the same thing every time.

“Hi, what can I get you?” The barista asks politely ready to take your order. 

“Hi, can I get a large frozen hot chocolate with caramel sauce, and two pumps of the caramel syrup please?”

“Of course! We’ll make that right away!”

After waiting about 5-7 minutes you got your drink, you loved this drink so much. Even though there wasn't any caffeine, you loved it. You take a sip, it's pure bliss to you, although that same bliss isn't exactly shared for everyone. You walk back to your friends and sit down, you grab your books and laptop situating yourself before speaking. “So… is it gossip time now?” you ask, clearly giddy with the idea of sharing dirty rumors, insights and leaked secrets. 

Each one of you shares your own little pieces, the minutes ticking by and the studying completely forgotten. However, you perk up at the name of a boy.. A boy who was always a topic in these gossip sessions, but now, suddenly it feels a bit more… Intriguing? Why? Was it because the boy was Heeseung? The one who invited you to a party, called you princess, and spoke to you in a way that made your heart flutter in a way it never did for him.

“I heard Heeseung was making out with Wony behind the bleachers of the basketball court,” Julie leans forward while speaking knowing the topic of Lee Heeseung is quite hot and if anyone overheard would probably spread it further. Although her action is quite hypocritical cause she's currently spreading rumors that she heard from someone else, you let it slide.

“Really? Heeseung and the cheer captain? I saw it coming from the start, is it true tho?” Karina chiming in with her own input “I think so, someone said they got pretty heated, rumor has it they went to the locker room,” Julie responds back, it's clear she loves gossip. She somehow knows everything.

“Isn't this his third girl this week?” The unamused tone in Jennie's voice is prominent, obviously not his first time doing this. 

“What's weird is when he does get girlfriends he's always loyal, treats them like queens, and he can hold a relationship. I don't understand him. It's like this constant push and pull.” Karina chimes in. You've been quiet throughout this whole exchange since Heeseung became the topic. By this point you stopped listening after Karina's line. That is until you're pulled out of your thoughts by a familiar low voice.

“Talking about me with your friends Y/N?” 

Fuck.

All four of you whip your heads around to see Heeseung standing by the café entrance. He lets out a chuckle and starts approaching the table you and friends are sat at.

“I hope you're not talking any shit over here ladies,” Heeseungs huge smirk giving away the meaning of his words

“Y/N you know him? When were you gonna tell us you’ve spoken to Heeseung?” Julie's voice raised slightly due to her surprise.

You’re about to say something to reply to her but Heeseung does before you can, “Oh we’ve talked, haven’t we Y/N? She’s coming with me to Riki’s party on Saturday.” His smirk grew wider, and his tone dropped slightly.

“She’s what!?” Your three friends whipped their heads back to you looking at you with wide eyes. 

“I was gonna tell you…” You say, all the attention making you a bit timid.

“You didn’t bother to come talk to us first?” Karina explains her disappointment.

“I’m sorry.. It was an in-the-moment type thing..” You then check the time seeing its almost 3:35, you have a class at 3:40. As much as you’d hate to leave the conversation like this, you had to. “Um.. I have to go, I’ll see you guys later. I’m sorry..” You put your books and laptop away, getting up and putting on your bag. You give everyone one last glance, including Heeseung before exiting the cafe. 

────୨ৎ────

It’s now Saturday. 

You had resolved the situation with your friends and now they’re kind of cheering for you. They know you hate parties and the fact you’re coming out of your shell makes them happy for you. Currently you’re getting dressed, it’s 5:22 PM. You had just picks out a dress. A black, tight-fitted dress. The fabric has sparkles on it, and the straps of the dress are laced, and it drops into a slight ‘V’ in the chest area. It’s a bit scandalous, but maybe you like it that way. You’re not used to wearing fancy dresses. 

Finally arriving at the fountain after finishing your hair and make up you see Heeseung, Jake, and Sunghoon waiting there, waiting for you. 

You walk over to them, and they turn their heads to you. Once Heeseung sees you he starts to smirk before speaking, his voice low. “Didn’t think you’d make it princess. You look nice. Come on let’s go,” He makes a gesture with his hand before walking towards a car with his friends following beside him. You start following, having to speed walk to catch up due to all of them being tall. Once you make it to the car you all get in, Jake and Sunghoon in the back, Heeseung driving, and you in the passenger seat. It all seemed suspiciously calculated but you didn’t say anything because it was probably just your mind playing tricks on you. 

The car ride was seemingly normal, with Jake and Sunghoon being rowdy in the back, and you and Heeseung being completely silent with occasional glances here and there. You were texting your friends when Heeseung suddenly hands you his phone while driving. You look up from your phone to look at him confused before he finally says “You’re on aux pretty,” You don't know why but your heart felt like it was doing tricks in your chest. 

After a pretty silent car ride besides Jake’s yelling, Sunghoon’s babbling, and the music you had put on you arrive at Riki’s huge mansion. It’s crazy how a middle-class girl like you is even in the presence of these rich people. The four of you walk into the mansion, the music loud, rainbow lights all over the place, and the living room acting as a make-shift dance floor. Immediately you can smell all the alcohol and weed. 

You wander off on your own to get a look at the mansion, it looked so nice and you really wanted to see all the things the mysterious Nishimura had around his place. It was beautiful really, nothing you’d ever seen before. Not that you’d seen the interior of mansions before anyways.. You made your way to the kitchen only to find many, many alcohol bottles. You pick one up inspecting it before hearing a voice behind you, 

“I didn’t take you for a drinker Y/N.” The voice is so familiar to you that you don’t even need to look behind you to know it was Heeseung. 

“I’m not, Lee”

“Why don’t you try some then princess?” He starts pouring some alcohol into a cup not even awaiting a response.

“I mean I guess I can..” You were a bit nervous, never in your life had you drank alcohol. Not even at the frat party you went to years ago. He hands you the cup and you take a small sip, you feel the liquid go down your throat with a burn. You cough a small amount and make a face at the bitterness of the drink. 

“What do you think?” Once again he has that same old smirk on his.. Gorgeous face. “It’s so bitter.. How do people drink this shit?” Your face contorting into a look of disgust, it was a serious question to you. 

“Well.. I don’t know but I enjoy it. Just wait till you start to get drunk.” He pours himself a cup of the same alcohol before immediately downing it in one go. You look at him in shock, “seriously? How and why?” 

“Makes it kick in faster,” He shrugs. 

“Woah the room is spinning” You say whilst taking another sip of the alcohol. You were starting to get used to it. 

“That means it’s working,” He smirks, leaning down to get closer to you. “Come on, why don’t we go dance?” You nod and he holds out his hand for you to take, which you do. He leads you to Riki’s living room where there’s a bunch of people dancing. Heeseung leads you to the middle before releasing your hand, and placing his hands on your waist instead. Your back is against his chest, you both dance together. You’re having so much fun you don’t notice his hands travelling down to your hips gripping them before pulling them to make your ass press against his clothed crotch. You let out a small gasp at the feeling, the alcohol had completely taken over your system at this point. You begin to grind your ass against him making his grip on your hips get tighter.

He leans down burying his face in your neck letting out a groan. “Princess, what do you think you’re doing?” He says breathlessly.

“Having fun.” 

“Why don’t we go somewhere else darling?” He whispers into your ear, his voice low and seductive. You nod and turn around so now you’re facing him. He takes your hand taking you around the house to find an empty bedroom. You two finally find one and enter it, as soon as you’re both inside he closes and locks the door before immediately pinning you to it. He takes a glance at your lips, and then back into your eyes. “Can I?” He asked. You nod, and he immediately crashes his lips onto yours. 

You kiss him back moving your hands onto his shoulders gripping his shirt tightly like he’ll disappear. Your lips move passionately against each other. His hands roam your body before finally landing on your ass grabbing handfuls of it. He slips his tongue into your mouth moving it against yours as you two make-out. You can feel saliva running down your chin from the messy kisses but you don’t pay attention to it, too focused on kissing him. 

You both start running out of breath, he finally pulls away, a string of saliva still connecting your lips before breaking. You look into each other's eyes in a comfortable silence. However, it doesn't last long as Heeseung breaks it, “Bed. Now.” without hesitation you follow his command and make your way to the bed.

That night, you had the best sex of you life. You had heard Heeseung was good in bed, but you didn't think he was THAT good.. Turns out you had thought wrong. You'd only had sex two or three times before with an ex-boyfriend, but Heeseung was definitely so much better. 

That morning you found yourself waking up in a bed that wasn't yours. However, it also wasn't the room you had fallen asleep in. After having sex, you had fallen asleep in the bedroom in Riki's house, but now you're in a dorm room and it's not your own. You connect some dots and realize it's probably Heeseungs. Despite the college being extremely wealthy they still cheaped out on the dorm rooms. The rooms are thankfully spacious unlike public universities, however, they still have roommate systems so they don't have to build as many. Fortunately, Heeseungs wasn't home. You smell bacon coming from the other room and get out of bed noticing the clothes you're in clearly aren't yours. 

Walking into the kitchen you see Heeseung cooking breakfast for the two of you. Scrambled eggs, bacon, and hashbrowns. You could never go wrong with a simple breakfast like that one. Heeseung hears your footsteps and looks up from the pan to look at you. “Morning sleepyhead,” he teases.

“Shut up, Lee,” you spit back, he can tell you didn't actually mean it but it made him let out a chuckle. 

He finishes cooking and plates the food and grabbing drinks and places them at the table. You both sit down across from one another. You glance at him for a brief moment feeling your heart flutter as you remember last night. Every touch, every caress, every orgasm, it all felt so real. Or did it?

After eating you get up to place your cup and plate in the sink. You check the time realizing you had a class in 45 minutes. “Heeseung, I have to go to class. I’ll see you later okay?” He nodded, getting up and approaching you. He gives you a quick gentle peck on your lips and gives you a sweet smile. You grab your things and give him a wave goodbye leaving his dorm secretly committing his dorm number to memory. You exit the dorm building, it was the West building, you live in the North building. That’s all the way across campus, you sigh before starting to speed walk to your dorm building so you could get ready for class. 

After a long way you make it and enter your dorm to find your roommate Natty already gone. You quickly change into your own clothes, do your hair and quickly do your makeup. You grab your bookbag and exit the dorm heading to your class.

Class was boring as usual, the only class you care about is the ones that pertain to your major. Speaking of, today is your day for the aquarium again. Suddenly your day is much better and you quickly make your way to the aquarium. On your way you look at the scenery which is always really pretty. The cherry blossom trees make it seem so aesthetic. You zone out while walking thinking of various topics like K-Pop, your friends, imaginary scenarios until they're interrupted when you catch sight of something. 

Lee Heeseung, and Jang Wonyoung. Julie had mentioned they were probably hooking up or

dating, but you didn't expect to see him touching her.. caressing her.. flirting with her.. You had figured it was a rumor, but seeing him in front of you touching and flirting with another girl made you upset. Did last night mean nothing? Did those tender touches in the morning mean nothing? What about the aftercare? 

He has his hands on her waist as they're talking, under a cherry blossom nonetheless, god how icky can this get. You storm off even tho you know he wouldn't notice. You keep going towards the aquarium. If all else fails at least there's bubbles right?

Your favorite part of your day, feeding the fish, and the jellies but most importantly the three seals. The others don't have names yet but you're working on it. Your professor said once all the freshmen can actually tell the seals apart then you can name the other two, but for now Bubbles is the only named one.

You started feeding the seals until there was no more fish in the bucket. You wait till they were done before doing a hand gesture. Bubbles is the only one who knows it since you had taught it to him. He swims up to lay on the edge of the seal pool. You then go to to pet him.

Fuck Heeseung when you have bubbles right? It's not common to use petting a seal as a comfort method, but to you it is. Why would Heeseung hookup with you, do aftercare, and make you food if he didn't like you? 

You pull out your phone and take a photo of you with Bubbles. This is your favorite thing to do to pass the time. Bubbles is just a seal but to you he’s one of the only people that will listen as corny as it sounds. 

That day went as normal, you went to your classes, hung out with your friends in between them, and visited the seals every now and then.

You're getting ready for bed when your phone screen lights up, you pick it up and see a text from an unknown number.

From: 010-6200-0000

| hey y/n

| it's heeseung 

| Julie gave me your number 

| oh hey hee what's up?

| do you need something?

| ‘hee’ ?? I like it

| anyways

| can you come over to my dorm?

| jay isn't here

| your dorm? 

| yk we're not allowed in 

the other buildings after 8:30 and it's 10

| idc figure it out

| it’ll be fine

| i can pay off the dean if you get caught

| wtv

| im omw 

You put your phone down and put on a hoodie, a phone charger, your school ID, and your phone and head out the door. Your roommate Natty is already asleep so you quietly slip out. Walking down the halls of the dorm building to the elevator.

Managing to sneak past the security, you make your way to the west dorm building having to sneak past the front desk where there's security. After successfully sneaking past you scan your ID at the elevator, luckily the security measures aren't that advanced. 

After the elevator ride to the 5th floor you walk down the hall to find the door with the number 15169.

You let out a small giggle, of course the campus’ alleged “sex god” would have 69 in his dorm number.

You knock on the door and wait for him to answer the door.

It only took a couple seconds for him to answer, the door opened and revealed him. He was in a simple black T-shirt and grey sweatpants.

 Shit. Grey sweatpants. Everyone knows what happens when guys wear grey sweatpants.

You took a glance down before quickly averting your eyes to his face. Your action doesn't go unnoticed as he internally smirks before looking you up and down. “Come in”

You walk into his dorm and he closes the door after you come in. “Must be good at sneaking around, hm?” You can practically hear the smirk on his face if that was even physically possible.

“Maybe, what's it to you Lee?” He laughs lowly at your clap back, “Relax princess it was a joke, no need to get defensive,” he moves closer to you now practically in your face. You can feel his breath on your skin. Wasting no time he presses his lips to yours in a slow passionate kiss, and you waste no time kissing him back slipping your tongue in his mouth to dance with his.

One of his hands is on your waist and the other is playing with the hem of your shirt. He breaks the kiss to get your shirt off giving him a view of your lacy white bra with a pink bow, “This is quite cute, it suits you baby,” he then takes your hand and drags you to his bedroom. 

Waking up after some hardcore sex is not for the weak at all. You wake up in his bed but he’s not next to you. You sit silently waiting to possibly hear any noise but you don’t hear any. He must’ve left.. 

You get up from his bed feeling a slight sting between your legs. God.. Did you two really fuck THAT hard? You remember it but didn’t think you were going at it that hard. Is it possible you were so loud the neighboring rooms heard? God you hope not, 

You grab your things getting ready to leave his dorm before making exit, Heeseung nowhere to be found. You leave the dorm building, not having to sneak this time since it's daytime. Arriving at your own dorm building and your own dorm you put on fresh clothes. After brushing your hair and doing your makeup you grab your backpack and laptop to get ready for your class in 20 minutes. You head out of your dorm and walk to class, fortunately, you liked this class because of the research paper you were doing currently. You had to do a paper and a presentation on a marine animal of your choice, obviously, you chose seals. The only good part was the paper, you hate presentations, you get so anxious but that’s a problem for another day. You don't have to worry about that currently. 

It’s now lunchtime, and still no word from Heeseung. You see him sitting with his friends in the cafeteria and decide to go and talk to him. After walking over all seven of them look at you curiously wondering why you’re there.They know you have some sort of connection with Heeseung but they didn’t know to what extent it went. “Hee, why didn’t you wait for me to wake up? And why haven’t you texted me?”

“What’re you talking about Y/N? Why would I text you, I’d only text you if I need something. You didn’t spend the night last night what’re you even on about Y/N?”

His words shock you, is he denying last night? Is he denying the fact he knew you in any way but a friend? You don't have the energy to deal with it right now. “Oh.. right, I guess I just got mixed up or something. You look down in defeat, unable to even look him in the eyes before walking away. Suddenly, you don’t feel hungry anymore having lost your appetite. 

Even worse, is that today it wasn’t your day to feed the animals in the aquarium. You avoid your friends for the rest of the day deciding to just go to the library to do some classwork and study. You’re there until you have to go to your next class.

After finishing your classes for the day you start to head back to your dorm 

Building until you see Heeseung with Winter. Seriously? Wasn’t he just all over Wonyoung? Then you, then Wony again, and now Winter? He was being pretty touchy feely with her, and whispering into her ear while she giggles. You feel sick to your stomach and rush back to your dorm. 

After entering your dorm you put your stuff down and change into comfy clothes, shorts, and a tank top. Before you can lie down your phone lights up with a text message. 

From: Heeseung !

| come over y/n

| pls

Does he have no shame at all? You had thought for a moment to yourself. You had thought that maybe he wanted to talk about the stunt he pulled earlier. Maybe he wanted to apologize. 

You get to his dorm and he opens the door. He smirks slightly when he sees your outfit and opens the door wider to let you in. You walk in and head for his couch. You don’t even bother to ask where Jay is. Heeseung sits next to you on the couch and swings his arm around you, bringing you closer to his side. You two cuddled on the couch for hours before it escalated to making out and sex. 

This routine went on for multiple nights for months. You’d have sex, or cuddle all night, sometimes both, you’d share tender and soft kisses as if you were both a couple. Then the very next morning you’d see him all over another girl, he’d pretend he didn’t know you in front of his friends, but be all lovey dovey in private. You were so fed up with it, but the pull Heeseung had on you was irresistible. 

He’d push you away;

Just to pull you back in. 

Every morning after you two had cuddled all night or had sex he never stayed, you'd always wake up to an empty bed just to leave and find him all over another girl. The girls usually changed all the time, but one remained constant. You. Even when he noticed you watching he wouldn't back away from the girls. He’d ignore you and your texts all day, would pretend you were nothing but acquaintances but at night he’d treat you like you were the sun to his moon and occasionally even took you to fancy restaurants. 

In fact now that you thought about it, he did say he'd text you if he needed something from you. Clearly he just “needed” to have sex with you. You’d also noticed how you two actually barely knew each other, the most you could recite was surface level things about each other like his favorite color, or movie and he knew about you and Bubbles and you even showed him pictures of you with Bubbles,. Most importantly, neither of you ever confessed feelings, you had just assumed this was exclusive with a side of fan-service? 

Tonight you two are cuddled on his couch, at this point you'd become a mast at sneaking past the campus security. While you're both cuddling on the couch Heeseung is watching tiktok's and you're watching his screen as well. He occasionally would place kisses on your forehead, the top of your head, your lips, your cheek or your hand. 

The longer you two sit here cuddling, his arm around you, the more your mind starts to wander to everything that's happened with Heeseung recently. You finally decided to ask him a serious question.

“Heeseung, what are we?”

He freezes for a moment seemingly surprised by your question, but it also looks like he had almost expected you to ask this at some point. 

“We? Y/N, you're one of my best friends of course,” he didn't even really seem to bat an eye at his hurtful response. Your heart drops to your stomach at this answer, it’s clearly not what you wanted. Your eyes start to gloss over but he doesn't notice it, you manage to keep your voice steady, “That's it? Don't you think we're more?”

“Why would you think that?” 

What's his problem? Is he serious? Surely it's a cruel cruel prank right?

“Heeseung you treat me like I’m your girlfriend already, are you leading me on? Toying with me?” You can't stop the tears from flowing now, and your voice raises slightly as you clap back. “No, it's just all in good fun. it's not my fault you took it the wrong way.”

You couldn't even fight back anymore. You just got up, grabbed your things and left with tears in your eyes. Were you a fool? Did you really interpret his actions wrong? Is this your fault? Or his? There were so many questions going through your head, you knew Heeseung was in the wrong, but why was your brain telling you otherwise? 

Upon arriving back to your own dorm quietly you see Natty sleeping in her bed, and you quietly go to your bed and climb in it to go to bed. Your tears eventually subsided as you couldn't cry anymore, you were too tired. You close your eyes before finally drifting off to sleep. 

The next morning you wake up in your bed with sore eyes. It was a Saturday so you didn't have any classes today luckily. You get dressed, and grab your phone to head to the café with your friends. You walk across campus to the café seeing your friends at a table and you sit down. “Hey, Y/N what's wrong? You look like a wreck,” Julie was always concerned about you she could always tell when something was up. “It’s nothing Julie don't worry about it, okay?” You really weren't looking forward to having to explain everything but you knew your friends wouldn't back down.

“No, tell us, there's clearly something wrong,” in that moment you wished Karina wasn't good at reading people. Somehow all your friends could read you like an open book. “Fine.. I’ll tell you,” you explained the whole situation with Heeseung to them and tell them what happened last night. You hadn’t been talking to them because they were all really busy so they had no idea about any of this. “Y/N.. I’m so sorry that happened to you.. I thought you knew he wasn't a good person though?” Je nnie's question makes you think for a few moments trying to come up with a response. The truth is that you did know he was a player and not a good person, but the fact he could hold a relationship when he was in one was what influenced your decisions to get closer to him.

“I know but, I don't know, I thought it'd be different. He was so sweet to me, and you know whenever he gets a girlfriend he’s the sweetest to her and he's loyal.”

“Y/N you can’t just base your trust off of that alone. He’s known for flirting with a new girl everyday. He never even told you he liked you Y/N,” Jennie's disappointment was clear. She knew it wasn't fully your fault, and Heeseung is a dick but you still fell for his tricks. 

“You're right:. I’m an idiot, but I can't let him go. I really like him, should I just talk to him?” You were optimistic that there was something between the two of you even though the others believe he made it clear that there was nothing., “That’s up to you Y/N, but we don’t know if the outcome will be the one you want,” Julie chimed in, and that's all it took for you to get up and go look for him. 

After walking around campus for a bit you found him with his friends at the basketball court. You hesitate for a moment before walking over to them almost getting hit with a ball in the process. His friend Jake notices and goes over to Heeseung to talk to him.

“Yo Heeseung, Y/N is walking over here.” Heeseung immediately looks over to see that you are, indeed, walking over to them. He starts to smirk as he remembers what happened between the two of you last night. He walks away from his friends and starts approaching you, meeting you halfway now face to face with you. He doesn't say anything waiting for you to speak first. “Heeseung we should talk,” He nods and walks over to a tree that's near the basketball court but where nobody passersby could hear you two. 

“Look, I really don't appreciate what you’ve been doing to me, Heeseung. I feel like you've been toying with me, I feel like you've been just using me for sex. You treat me so well in private but ignore me in public. I really have feelings for you Hee. I’m an idiot for thinking we had something, I knew about the rumors yet I still would sneak into your dorm whenever you asked me to. I really like you, and it's okay if you don't feel the same, I know you don't actually,” You pour your heart out to him expressing every thought and feeling you've felt over these few months that you two have been in this ‘friends with benefits’ type dynamic. 

You hear him let out a sigh before he cups your face with his hands making you look up at him. “Y/N. Look.. I’m really sorry. Yesterday a lot of shit went down and I got drunk and took my anger out on you when you asked that ‘what are we’ question. The details aren’t important but I’m really sorry. I really like you too, I’m just not used to feeling this way. I know I've had previous girlfriends but those were from high school, I was different back then. Please forgive me Y/N,” this response was probably the last one you were expecting. Had Heeseung really revealed his feelings to you, and he reciprocated?

This is like a complete 180 to what he was like before. Is this really the same Heeseung from last night? Did he really like you? “Do you really?” You were in disbelief almost at his words. “Yes Y/N. I’m really sorry. I really like you. I’m not good with my feelings ever since college,” you really didn’t expect him to actually have feelings for you. “I forgive you Heeseung,” the words slipped from your mouth before you could even think about it. “You do?” He wasn’t expecting you to forgive him that easily. 

“I thought I didn’t want a girlfriend after my high school girlfriends fucked me over which is why I slept around so much, but when I met you that all changed. It’s been a while since I had felt this way and I didn’t know how to express it. Y/N. I really want you to be mine.. Please?” You nod immediately and he wraps his arms around you to pull you into a hug, and you hug him back. 

After a minute he pulls back and kisses you passionately. The kiss is full of emotion, and feelings. Just as the kiss starts to become heated you both start to hear cheers coming from the basketball court. Heeseung pulls away and looks over, he had completely forgotten that although they couldn't hear you, they could still see. They had just watched the tender moment and are now cheering about it. You’re a little embarrassed at first but then you laugh a little. 

Heeseung takes your hand and takes you back over to the basketball court where his friends are. 

“So..” Heeseung starts, “Obviously you know this is Y/N, but now she's also…” he hesitates for a moment, the words seeming foreign on his tongue.

“My girlfriend.” His words felt so good to hear, finally ending his game of push and pull.