#this one was fun i enjoy writing drunk blaine

[cryscendo]

Hi how about „things you said when you were drunk“ 🤭

tysm for the prompt! i decided to make this during “blame it on the alcohol”, in a possible scenario that could’ve happened once kurt took a drunken blaine back to his house. hope you enjoy !!

Pairing: Kurt Hummel/Blaine Anderson

Rating: G

Word Count: 1014

Prompt: 11 - things you said when you were drunk

if you would like to send me a prompt, you can do so here!

fic can be read under the cut <3

The effort it took to haul Blaine up to his bedroom was far from an easy task. He was entirely inebriated and as a consequence, terribly unstable on his feet. There was a moment where Kurt was fully convinced that Blaine was going to accidentally fall down the stairs, but somehow they made it — and they didn’t even wake his dad, thank god.

When Blaine spoke, it was entirely too loud. “I can’t believe how-”

“Shhh!” Kurt corrected urgently. “My family is asleep, remember?”

“Right, sorry!” Blaine whisper-shouted, and Kurt supposed it was better than nothing. “I can’t believe how fun that was.” Kurt got them both into his bedroom, softly closing the door behind them in hopes that the barrier would muffle most of Blaine’s giddy chattering. “Did you see my duet with Rachel?”

“Yep. It sure was a duet,” Kurt replied and he could admit quietly to himself that he was bitter. It didn’t matter that Rachel was drunk; she knew that Kurt liked Blaine. It wasn’t a secret by any stretch. So for her to kiss him like she had and then sing with him afterwards, it felt a bit like betrayal.

Blaine leaned into Kurt happily, blissfully unaware of Kurt’s slightly sour mood. “God, she really is talented, huh?” He praised and Kurt couldn’t help but roll his eyes.

“Oh yeah, she’s brilliant,” he replied sarcastically, most definitely not bitter. Kurt helped Blaine until he was seated on the foot of the bed. There was no way that Kurt was successfully going to be able to get Blaine into sleepwear, he realized upon looking over Blaine’s disheveled form. His burgundy cardigan sat on him messily and his curls had all but escaped the confines of its gel. The best thing he could do was just let Blaine go to sleep as he was.

Plus, if he focused on that, it would serve better to distract him from the fact that Blaine Anderson was in his bedroom. His very obvious crush. On his bed.

He was also shit-faced drunk. And had just kissed Rachel Berry about an hour before. That was decidedly less sexy.

“Alright, loverboy, you need some sleep.” Kurt helped Blaine out of his shoes and urged him up to where his head was resting on the pillows.

“You seem upset,” Blaine acknowledged and Kurt was met with the saddest, wettest eyes that he’d ever seen Blaine manage. “Why are you upset?”

“I’m not upset. Just a little annoyed that I’m having to babysit you.” Well, that was at least somewhat true.

“No, you’re definitely upset…” Blaine argued with a bit of drunken hurt in his voice. “Did I do something wrong? Are you mad at me?”

“You’re fine, Blaine,” he stated. He didn’t want to have this conversation. Not at all, but certainly not while Blaine was drunk.

Blaine gasped then, as if coming to some sort of realization, and sat up in bed. “Is this about Rachel? Are you mad that I kissed her?”

“Blaine. You’re drunk. This is not the time to talk about this.” Kurt pulled the covers up over Blaine’s chest, hovering over him to meet his gaze. “So go to bed. You’re probably going to be hungover in the morning.”

It was then that Blaine reached up and held Kurt’s face in his hands. The gesture caught Kurt off guard and it was all he could do stare at Blaine with a wide-eyed, stunned look. Blaine, however, did not seem to register Kurt’s shock as he began to ramble. “I’m sorry if I hurt your feelings, Kurt.”

“Blaine, seriously, it’s fine.”

“No, it’s not fine!” Blaine interjected a bit too loudly. Kurt immediately shushed him and pulled Blaine’s hands away from his face. He looked towards his closed door for a moment, waiting in nervous anticipation for someone to open it to find out what all the noise was. When nobody came, Kurt was able to relax just a fraction. He opted to hold Blaine’s hands instead since the boy was feeling particularly touchy tonight, and returned his attention to him.

“It’s not fine,” Blaine continued, quieter this time. “I shouldn’t have kissed Rachel in front of you, especially when I know that you have a crush on me.”

“Blaine, we really don’t need to talk about this-”

“Lemme finish! Y’know I would’ve kissed you too, right?” Blaine stated through slightly slurred speech and—

Wait. What?

“You’re so nice to me and handsome and I would’ve kissed you. But you’re also my best friend and I don’t wanna mess things up with my best friend ‘cause I’ve like, never dated anyone before. And I don’t want us to end up like how things did with Jeremiah ‘cause that was like, super embarrassing. So I can’t date you even though you want me too and I kinda want to ‘cause you’re my best friend and it would be so sucky if I screwed that up.”

While it was certainly a bit of word vomit on Blaine’s end, Kurt still thought that he understood what Blaine was getting at. And at its most basic level, Kurt already knew that this was Blaine’s sentiment. He liked the friendship that he and Kurt had and really didn’t want to jeopardize that.

However, listening to Blaine now, pouring his (albeit drunken) feelings out to Kurt like this felt much more honest and raw. And with it being past midnight and with him just watching Blaine hang all over Rachel for two hours, it was all too much. Blaine was all too much.

“Go to bed, Blaine,” is what he decided to say in response.

Blaine pouted, but didn’t argue. “Fine, but only ‘cause my room is spinning and closing my eyes makes it stop.” He laid back down on the pillows then and Kurt let out a sigh of relief. Blaine yawned, getting comfortable beneath the covers. “We’re gonna talk ‘bout this tomorrow, though.”

“You probably won’t even remember this by tomorrow,” Kurt replied, but Blaine was already asleep.

God, he hoped that Blaine wouldn’t remember this tomorrow.

[daisyishedwig]

Glee tag game

I was tagged by @annepi-blog, thank you!

1. Favourite season 1 episode: Okay, so the obvious answer is Laryngitis because it's one of the absolutely best Kurt episodes in the whole show. But I also fucking hate everything about Rachel's storyline but Rose's Turn alone does kind of give it the leg up to still be the best episode anyway.

2. Favourite season 2 episode: Oh I've got so many contenders for this one. I love Furt and the relationships we get to see between Burt and Kurt and Kurt and Finn. But then Never Been Kissed is just a classic with it being Blaine's first episode and Chris' acting in it is just so so incredible. Blame It On The Alcohol would be a higher contender because I love drunk Blaine and I actually really enjoy Finn in that episode, which isn't something that happens a lot for me until season 4, but the writer's biphobia that they push onto Kurt really ruins it. But I think the actual winner would have to be Prom Queen. I love Kurt in that episode and I love it being the first time we start to see that Blaine's not perfect, that he's a little broken, a little fragile. It's underutilized, but it really sets up so much of what makes Blaine my favorite character to write.

3. Favourite season 3 episode: Okay, we all know it's Michael. Like of course The First Time, On My Way, and Dance With Somebody are all great episodes that I really love. But Michael is the episode I rewatch the most. And part of my love for it is, a) the cut Want You Back scene, and b) believing Seblaine to be genuine, very close friends which makes the slushee incident so much more heart-wrenching. But it's still such a good episode, especially for me with my deep love of angst and Sebastian Smythe, it's really just the best episode in general. Plus it has the added bonus of having the one and only Samcedes duet so, yeah, it's the best.

4. Favourite season 4 episode: Diva and Feud are both a lot of fun, even if a lot of what happens in them is really ridiculous. Guilty Pleasures is such a good Blam episode. And I love I Do for the flirty and thirsty sides of Klaine we get to see. But I do feel like, once again, the angst lover in me has to go with The Breakup. The Scientist and Don't Speak are two of my favorite songs on the whole show. Everyone's acting in that episode is just so so good. Darren and Chris just knock it out of the park in every single scene, and I will never cease to be awed by them.

5. Favourite season 5 episode: I would probably say Tested, because I always love an episode where Blaine gets to cry. And I love Elliot and everything that he does for Klaine in getting them to communicate. And I love getting to truly see Blaine acknowledge his self-worth issues instead of them just constantly being buried and locked away. A lot of the episode is weird and difficult to watch but the conversation that Klaine have at the end will always be one of my favorite Klaine scenes. Other contenders were Bash, because I love Kurt in that episode and once again we get angsty Blaine. And then New York New York because its when we first get to see Klaine actively working to fix the problems in their relationship instead of clinging to the past so tightly that they crush it entirely.

6. Favourite season 6 episode: God, this one is hard because I'm honestly not sure there's any episode that I truly love. Like The Hurt Lockers are iconic, and I love Chris' acting in 2009. But so much of that season is just weird and almost pointless that I'm not sure I have an episode I like enough to consider my favorite.

7. Episode that makes me cry: I haven't rewatched The Quarterback since it aired because of how much it makes me cry. Tested and The Breakup also both hurt a lot.

8. Episode that makes me laugh: The Hurt Lockers for sure

9. Favourite tribute episode: Michael obviously. It's probably my favorite episode of the whole show in general and the songs are so well done.

10. Favourite Christmas episode: Ooof, I love them all for different reasons, but there's just something about Blaine going to New York with Burt to comfort Kurt that will always get to me so it's gotta be Glee, Actually.

11. Episode with the best songs: Ooooh, probably the mashup episodes? I'm not sure I can pick one but it would be a tie between Never Been Kissed and Mash Off.

12. Favourite sectionals episode: Oh, I'm torn between Special Education and Hold On To Sixteen. I love Quinn and Sam getting a duet, and I love Valerie, and I love Mercedes and Tina getting to sing Dog Days Are Over (maybe I just love the lack of Rachel solos, lol). But I do love the set list in Hold On To Sixteen, I love Quinn singing Control, I love Kurt and Tina and Mike all getting solo parts in ABC. And of course The Troubletones are just so good.

13. Favourite regionals episode: I've gotta say On My Way even if it's largely just for Glad You Came and Cough Syrup. The actual competition doesn't matter much to me, but the Karofsky storyline was handled really well and I love Sebastian's apology to Blaine and the New Directions, and it's just good in general.

14. Favourite nationals episode: I really love the set list for Nationals in season 3, but I hate Rachel and so much of that episode is all about Rachel and her choking at her NYADA audition and somehow convincing Carmen Tibideux to come see her anyway. But on the other hand while I don't love the City of Angels set list for nationals as much, I do love the fact that they were all Finn's (and Cory's) favorite songs. And I love Burt and Carole being there. And I love Throat Explosion (or at least John Baptiste) actually being very kind and respectful of Finn's passing. I like that they didn't just lean hard into the show choir rivalry there and let them actually be humans who recognize the pain of the McKinley team. Also Throat Explosion's set was really good too.

15. Episode most people like but I don’t: I might get killed by my Klaine friends. But Love, Love, Love? At the time it aired I was super excited about the proposal, but now as an adult, I really wish it hadn't happened, especially not like that. Like I get that it's romantic in that big grand gesture that Kurt deserves and Blaine would always want to give him. But. They hadn't talked about it! While Kurt guessed it was coming on the drive, it still didn't leave him with anyway to actually pull Blaine aside and talk about it. And with multiple other show choirs there, including Sebastian, can you really expect Kurt to be able to say anything but yes? Like I would have loved for them to have a quiet, personal proposal. To have Blaine ask and have them talk about it and whether or not they're ready for that. And then they could do the big thing. But instead we got Kurt not being given a chance to think about if this is something he actually wants, and it leads to a lot of problems in the future for them.

16. Episode most people dislike but I like: Probably Old Dog, New Tricks. Like it's a weird episode, admittedly. But we get some of my favorite things in it. We get Blaine being a sweet and supportive partner, we get Klaine being a team, we get Kurt calling Rachel out on how selfish she is, we get puppies, and we get Peter Pan. It's great. I have fun with that episode.

and now that I have finally finished that, I'm going to tag @esilher, @calsvoid, @lusthurts, @backslashdelta, and @cryscendo

[kitkatt0430]

Since I rambled about last weeks episode as I watched it, I'm gonna do that again with this week's episode. So spoilers for The Flash S09E03 - Rogues of War beneath the cut. I'm depending on Hartley Rathaway to make things interesting again, so let's find out if he pulls through for me.

Opens with Fiddler and Boomerang having fun with a break in. I do enjoy their banter. Murmur, though... so creepy. (Yeah, I did see spoilers first so I know who is in the creepy mask.)

Barry and Iris taking cooking lessons in France. I do love that. And does this mean Iris is no longer a lethal chef? Since it took them 40 times in Flashtime... probably not.

But Iris really does not seem thrilled when Barry mentions she'll be pregnant soon. So seems like Ep 1's reveal of Iris' dislike of knowing so much about how her future is meant to happen hasn't been entirely dealt with. I'm not thrilled with this arc tbh. Like... I want to be glad they're finally addressing Iris feeling like she doesn't really have any real agency in her own life. But the time to address that was passed seasons ago. So doing it now feels forced.

oh lovely the app crashed, lets reboot that and hope I can skip forward to the right point.

Khione continues to make me think of Layla from Sky High, what with her interest in nature. And whatever is up with her is more interesting than the ongoing Chester/Allegra stuff.

Ooooh they name dropped the Cosmic Treadmill. I do love the Cosmic Treadmill. And after exposition and flashbacks and more exposition... yay there's Hartley!!!

STAR Labs for safe keeping. *snicker* Iris do you even hear yourself?

Hartley with his grin as he convinces Barry that they should steal shit together is hilarious. Like, he has to be having so much fun with this. Especially since they need more Rogues to pull it off.

Is Khione the official blocker of Chester/Allegra? Please say yes.

I don't remember Jaco right now (am I spelling his name right???) so I'm gonna have to look him up later.

Hartley pissing off Blaine makes me smile. Especially since he dislikes Hartley so much after last episode that Blaine makes a point of saying he isn't taking orders from Hartley. Oh how terrible, Hartley forced you to do the right thing and then pointed out getting drunk won't help. (Like... to some degree, I do get that there may be another source of his resentment of Hartley. If Blaine knows the story about Roderick and how Hartley waited five years to get him back then he may resent Hartley for getting his boyfriend back while Hartley destroyed the one thing that might bring back Frost. Of course, the biggest difference is that Hartley never tried to sacrifice anyone else's life to save Roderick. And, well... Roderick was never actually dead. Paused the show to write this so let's get back to it now.)

Goldface being dramatic and I do love that about him. And it amuses me that his on again, off again with Amunet is off again. And Carver. *cackling with laughter here* "Book club will remain a safe space." Lies apparently. *snicker* Hartley has to be wondering what kind of supervillain Goldface even is at this point. Also judging Barry so hard for his criminal contacts.

Oh... Jaco was in the episode where Iris got to be the Flash. I vaguely remember him now.

The bickering Rogues and Hartley once again asserting he's the smartest person in the room. Oh my arrogant Pied Piper. I do enjoy seeing him be so confident in his brilliance. :D Goldface and Blaine not getting along just makes me like Goldface more. And I already enjoy his character so much this episode.

What even is the point of the Chester/Allegra scene shoehorned in here?

Anyway, more Rogues banter. And Hartley is such a little shit. He's having so much fun pushing people's buttons and of course the Rogues being assholes to each other turns into them united against Barry so that they'll finally work together... which I think was Hartley's plan from the moment he started pushing buttons. He is a chess master who played against Eobard Thawne, after all.

Iris worrying about putting her career on hold to be a mom is pretty understandable. And I think it'd help if maybe she realized that she'll have more than just Barry to lean on when it comes to making time for herself once Nora comes. Joe and Cecile may wind up moving away, but Team Flash will still be there. And theoretically they're a found family.

I'm proud of Chester, making the Wayne Enterprises connection.

Oh, now Khione is enabling the Chester/Allegra. Bad Khione. Stop that.

Barry apologizing to the Rogues is actually kinda sweet. As funny as Goldface figuring out that Barry's the Flash on the spot, it's so much funnier that Jaco is just like 'yeah they got the same Jitter's order, it's obvious'. Had to pause the episode again, that's just hilarious. I may not have remembered Jaco before, but he is certainly memorable now. Barry, Barry, Barry... what is even the point of pretending to have a secret identity at this point?

So I'm kinda expecting Blaine to have betrayed them based on the listening device that showed up earlier. But it is fun to see all four Rogues working together with Barry.

Oh there's the betrayal. Mark Blaine. Asshole. I hate his stupid jacket. It looks terrible.

I do like that Hartley's first instinct is to tell Barry he's on the way to help. Of course, there are three more bad guy Rogues to stop Barry's Rogues from helping him.

De-powered Barry vs Blaine was definitely not gonna go Barry's way, but the Rogues vs Rogues was fun to watch. And Hartley canonically knows ASL!!!!!! Yes!

Jaco and Fiddler stopping mid fight to flirt. I adore them. That was unexpected and so cute.

Goldface naming the Red Death from Edgar Allen Poe. :D

Ooooh, likes like Hartley isn't the only Rogue sticking around. Goldface and Jaco will be helping out more this season too. Doesn't seem like they'll be in the next episode though, but I guess I'll know for sure when I check out the trailer for episode four.

Ryan has been missing for how long? And Team Flash is only finding out now? Why are these super hero teams so bad at reaching out to each other for help?

Fiddler is my fav bad Rogue now. Between flirting with Jaco and calling Blaine 'abs' mockingly, she's fun. And Blaine finding out that maybe he's in over his head now is exactly what he deserves.

Now for post episode thoughts.

Khione still doesn't seem to have a purpose. If she's supposed to be the right hero at the right time, then it may be a slog to get there. But right now, Caitlin would be a much more useful character than Khione is. So while Khione is sweet, that's all she seems to have going for her at the moment.

Chester/Allegra feel even more like a romantic plot tumor when there's Fiddler/Jaco's instant chemistry there to compare it to. Or last week's flirting with Hartley/Roderick.

Murmur trying to recruit Hartley was unexpected, but interesting in what it says about the respect Hartley must have commanded before he retired to run the club with Roderick. Especially since Goldface recognized Hartley once he identified himself as the Pied Piper. I'm not sure what to do with that yet, but it'll wind up expanded on in fanfic form eventually. I do like it's continuation on the last episode's themes about change, though. Hartley, when offered the chance to join the bad guys, turns the opportunity down because that's not who he chooses to be anymore. Compared to Blaine who presumably sought out Red Death's side because he cares more about his grief than what Frost would actually want. Much as I don't like Blaine, the narrative foil set up between him and Hartley is actually kinda interesting.

However. Does not look like we're getting more Hartley next week based on the trailer for episode 4, but maybe we'll learn how Ryan became the Red Death and if she's even our universe's Ryan? It'd be interesting if this is how the multiverse were to be reintroduced to the show. Probably not, but it's a thought.

Since ep3 was a more lighthearted episode, I'm expecting ep4 and ep5 (since they seem to be a two parter based on the naming) to be much darker. Which the teaser trailer seems to back up.

Despite the lack of Hartley, I think I'll tune in anyway next week. I mean, he might show up? And even if he doesn't, I don't want to miss out on important plot points for later. For now anyway. This season does seem better than what I saw of S8, but honestly it's a low bar to clear and my faith in the show runners/writers is pretty much gone.

(I'm still rooting for anyone to stab Mark Blaine in a dark alleyway. Because I'm afraid they're gonna give him yet another redemption arc. Undeservedly. Though it'd be great if he did not get a redemption arc and then Hartley gets to curbstomp him.)

[thnxforknowingme]

In Orbit (21/?)

Pairing: Klaine

Rating: T

Fic Summary: Blaine starts attending NYU, and he and Kurt weave in and out of each other’s lives - as friends, exes, friends with benefits, and harder-to-define labels - while they navigate college, relationships, and adulthood in New York.

Notes: I don't title my chapters but if I did, this one would be called "Blaine Alone."

Read on AO3 | All chapters

March 2015

It was an overcast day, but even in the gray, washed-out light of a cloudy sky, Paris was a beautiful city.

Blaine had woken up earlier than his traveling companions, which didn’t surprise him - he was generally an early-riser, and he’d stayed mostly sober last night while his friends got drunk on pricey aperitifs, and then cheap wine.

He’d texted his still-sleeping companions in their WhatsApp group chat to say he was going out, and then headed out from the hostel. They were staying north of the city center, and he could have taken the metro to his destination, but he decided to walk. He’d seen the insides of trains plenty of times, after all, and he only had a couple days to see Paris.

It was spring break, so Blaine had joined four of his classmates from NYU Florence to take a Eurail trip for the week. They’d spent two nights in Geneva, then moved on to Paris. After this, they’d go to Barcelona before returning to Italy.

The trip had been fun so far - Blaine enjoyed seeing new places, hearing new languages spoken around him, being mildly baffled by his surroundings and then slowly growing used to them, even over the course of just a few days. He was very inclined to go to museums, see the art and architecture of each city, and visit cultural sights. He could tell his classmates were less enthusiastic about this - while they happily checked off the big must-sees in each city, it seemed more perfunctory for them. When they’d visited the Louvre the previous day, Blaine had gone off on his own, so he could dawdle as much as he wanted, taking his time to admire different paintings and statues and rooms. His friends had ended up texting him that they were ready to go, and he’d insisted they leave without him so he could spend another hour or two. He knew he couldn’t see everything the massive museum had to offer, but he couldn’t bear to leave so quickly - who knew when he’d get another chance to be in Paris? He’d ended up meeting back up with them at a cafe a couple hours later.

Now, Blaine reached his goal for the morning: Shakespeare and Company, an independent English-language bookstore just across the river from Notre Dame. As soon as Blaine had mentioned to Effie that he’d be in Paris over spring break, she’d told him about this bookstore. It had apparently been a literary hub for the city for the past half-century, and Effie had gushed about all the famous authors who’d visited there. Blaine didn’t know all that much about literature, but looking back he was amused by how long it had taken him to figure out Effie was studying English, considering how much she geeked out about this kind of thing.

Blaine entered the bookshop, and was immediately charmed by the crowded shelves and haphazard aisles, the painted walls and stairs. It was oddly surprising to be entirely surrounded by English writing - for several months now, he’d had to actively think in order to read the words on signs or texts around him, but now the title of each book and label of each section of the store was understood immediately, automatically.

He ended up buying a tote bag and a collection of Adrienne Rich poems for Effie - he remembered her talking about Rich in the past, so it seemed like a good choice.

He hadn’t eaten breakfast, so Blaine wandered around the Latin Quarter until he found a creperie. Sitting at a wicker table outside a restaurant in Paris gave him the surreal feeling that this couldn’t truly be his life, that he must be in a dream or a movie or something. He’d had this feeling before - being on stage at Nationals, moving to New York, interning at the Mercury Lounge - but especially since coming to Europe, he’d been hit with it a lot more often.

Even though Blaine understood all the steps he’d taken to arrive at this moment in his life, it still didn’t quite feel right that he could actually be experiencing it.

He’d been enjoying his time in Florence, and moments like this made studying abroad unquestionably worth it, but he also couldn’t deny the hollow pit of...something that had taken up residence in his stomach ever since he’d crossed the Atlantic. Homesickness, maybe. The feeling of being truly and entirely out of his element. Florence was an incredibly gorgeous city, and Blaine loved feeling like he was surrounded by history and art at every turn. Florence was truly ancient in a way that no place in America had ever felt to him. There were memories and impressions of the past baked into the cobblestones, permeating the air. Then there was the food - the pasta, the wine, the espresso, tastes that were rich and deep and decadent. Over time, he became more familiar with the city, and he grew calmer each time he recognized a street or returned to a bar he’d been to before.

He was enjoying his classes for the most part, but his intensive Italian course was starting to take a toll on him. Blaine was used to excelling in academics - he put in the work, he studied meticulously, and he reached understanding. No subject had ever eluded him once he put his mind to it. But lately he’d been hitting a wall with Italian. He could study vocabulary and do the assignments and take thorough notes in class each day, but he still struggled. He wanted simply to understand, for the language to become natural and fluid, an extension of his own thoughts. Instead, each conversation with a native speaker was a battle, an internal labor to pull together the right words in the right order, to conjugate verbs into tenses that had meanings and moods with no direct correlation to English. He felt like he’d learned just enough to understand how very much he didn’t know, how vast and untamable a language really was, how impossible it was for him to ever genuinely understand it.

While his frustration with Italian gnawed at him, he knew the more prevalent cause of the pit in his stomach was loneliness. Blaine was friendly and personable - when he’d transferred to Dalton and had the chance at a fresh start, he’d learned to put himself out there, to be charming and confident, to introduce himself and quickly make connections with the people around him. And he’d succeeded at doing that in Italy - the NYU Florence program was pretty small, and he could recognize nearly every student, knew the names of each of his classmates, and could easily make small talk with a large percentage of them. He’d found a few people that he hung out with on a regular basis - going out for dinner or watching soccer games at bars. But even among them, he didn’t feel that he could truly be himself. They were nice enough people, but he didn’t fully click with them, like he did with Effie or Sho, with Sam or Tina. They didn’t have quite enough interests or passions or personality traits in common. He always felt like he was sort of on the outskirts of their interactions, always putting on a smile but never feeling that he would really be missed if he wasn’t around.

And then, of course, there was Ethan. Or, the lack of Ethan, the aftermath of Ethan. Blaine hadn’t intentionally planned to run away to Europe after breaking up with his boyfriend, but it did provide a nice bit of space. If he’d still been in New York, he likely would have had a music class or two with Ethan. In Italy, at least, he had absolutely no chance of bumping into his ex-boyfriend in an academic building or dining hall. He still hurt, though. Even though he’d been the one to end things, and he’d known it was unquestionably the right thing to do, he missed Ethan. Or at least, he missed what they’d had, when things were good between them. He missed the good morning texts and talking about their days over dinner; watching movies cuddled up on one of their beds, walking to the East Village to get bagels on Saturday mornings. He missed Ethan’s calming presence and the solid, comforting feeling of his arms holding Blaine tight. He missed the way he was always adjusting his beanie and the sharp-edged doodles in the margins of all of his class notes. He missed having a boyfriend. He missed being loved, in that particular way.

Blaine’s phone buzzed, and he took a deep breath of Parisian air, trying to ground himself. He was a young college student traipsing around Europe - he should be happy, excited. He pulled out his phone and saw that there was a new WhatsApp message from one of the friends he was traveling with.

We just got up, it read. Gonna grab breakfast and then head to catacombs, meet you there? Probably like 40 mins

Blaine swallowed the last bite of his crepe and then typed out a reply. Sounds good, see you there!

[skyblue-ringpops]

Hello -are you new here? Welcome if you are!

So your Deep Dive into Blaine Anderson is quite a lot to think about. It’s really mostly your head canon and not actually what happens in the show? Not canon?

When first introduced he becomes Kurt’s friend, who he has a crush on. He was subsequently called a mentor to him, but that’s not how we first see him. He’s just another teenager at this point, who Kurt falls in love with.

Most people don’t actually call Blaine whiny and clingy - only a small proportion of the fandom for a variety of reasons. Just like every character had their flaws and their critics. Most people like Blaine.

Blaine was a confident happy pupil at Dalton, and I don’t think he was putting on an act. But of course, there are other sides to him that we don’t see initially.

Yes, Blaine was assaulted at a Sadie Hawkins dance. Yes, he suggests on at least one occasion that he doesn’t have a good relationship with his dad. We don’t know for certain anything about Blaine’s relationship with his parents. But he does still mention them throughout the five seasons, indicating he lives with them, and that they were upset after Shooting Star.

Blaine attended prom with Kurt in season 2: it was hard for both of them, but they stood up to the bullies together. He also attended prom in season 3. So by Sadie Hawkins in 4, he rejects Tina’s proposal because he has a crush on Sam, not because of any apparent continued fear of school dances. Likewise, in Tina in the Sky with Diamonds, he’s happy to be there - he seems to have fact moved on from the assault trauma.

Do you think he had a close relationship with the Warblers? They were friends in 2, in fact they all looked up to him as charismatic lead singer who made the song choices. But they betrayed him in 3; in 4 Hunter and Sebastian tried to get him back to Dalton to secure a win at nationals, and then there was the drug issue. I’m inclined to think they were using him, and not genuine friends or family. He made his genuine friends, apart from Kurt, in season 4 at Mck.

Yes he was happy at Dalton, or so it seems. He wasn’t present when it burned down - he came back from his honeymoon to discover it had been burnt down. Yes he was upset, but bounced back quickly as the Warblers became part of the ND. A plot line really to insureBlaine had nothing to stay in Lima for, and could return to NY with Kurt. I don’t feel he was traumatised by it.

The wedding of course was Britannia’s wedding, and they had managed to get Blaine’s mum there, which was a nice touch. So the absence of dad and Cooper is not particularly shocking. And yes, there is part of deleted plot that the parents had divorced but a lot of plots were changed over the course of the show, so nothing can be gained from this.

I don’t agree Blaine raised himself. He dresses beautifully, he is beautifully mannered and follows etiquette. There must have been someone around to teach him these things. He never says his parents are not there, yes we don’t see them, and we can head canon a distant relationship, but it’s not certain. He calls his mum after SS, he is obviously close to her. He mentions them in Feud, and in Loser like Me. He has a sibling rivalry with Cooper - we don’t know how badly that affected Blaine: but Cooper does seem to care for him and be proud of him.

There’s no indication mum had a drink problem - yes she’s drunk at the wedding. Mmmm a lot of people get drunk at weddings. Santana and Quinn got drunk in I do - does that mean they have a drink problem? Blaine certainly doesn’t have a drink problem. In fact, he doesn’t drink a lot - we see him drunk on two occasions. We see several of the ND also drunk on occasions, but they don’t have a drink problem. In the scene with Dave, he appears to have a coke in front of him, and likely he drove. He said himself he went to the bar because he was lonely, and that’s probably the only place in Lima he would actually meet other gay people . By this stage, he was in therapy, had a job and was moving on: no suggestion he’s hanging round a bar because he’s depressed.

His relationship with Karofsky. Yes many in fandom hate it. I don’t love it. But let’s remember: they do seem to have a warm relationship, Blaine speaks fondly of him, there’s the gentle cheek kiss and eye contact when they split, which speaks volumes. Blaine looks happy to be with him. He tells him he admires him. Blaine is getting on with his life - as far as he’s concerned Kurt is in NY, they may not see each other again for a very long time. Blaine didn’t date Dave out of spite - Dave was there when he needed company, Dave had suffered himself - he was a good support to Blaine when he needed it. Why would he date him for pain and abuse, or punishment. He was in therapy, he was getting better and he was genuinely happy. Why would he feel guilty about the split - it was Kurt who called it off.

Blaine is one if the happiest, most likeable characters . He is loved by his friends and teachers - he is talented, high achieving, ambitious and kind. He’s generous, he cares for his friends, he will do anything to help his friends. He is great fun to be with. Yes, he’s insecure and suffers from loneliness which means he makes rash decisions. He’s not extremely depressed, he has periods when he is down - don’t we all?? He’s not suffering , depressed, sad individual but the opposite most of the time - fondly regarded as a ray of sunshine. If I was having a bad day, I’d want Blaine as my friend to cheer me up.

He’s not suicidal - I can’t see what you are saying re On my way - he isn’t in camera shot most of the time . He’s not rubbing his wrists or looking sad, he confidently states he wants marriage equality in 50 states - another thing that’s very important to him. Because he wants to marry. And he wants to marry Kurt. Cough Syrup is an excellent solo - at the time he sings it , no one is aware about Dave. Blaine had his own stresses that day - mostly to do with Sebastian. Kurt is the one who has been lonely, depressed and suicidal. Not Blaine.

He doesn’t have an eating disorder - we see one episode where he overeats because he is a new city. Then he feels bad because he’s put on the weight, and pulls away physically from Kurt. He’s not got an eating disorder. He enjoys sport - we see him at gym, boxing, aerobics and he dances a lot with friends.

Also, you make a big jump to assume he’s been sexually abused or assaulted. In fact, there is no indication of this at all. If that’s your head canon, that’s fine, but there’s nothing in canon that says this. Or nothing in his behaviour that says this. Plus I think you’ve got the wrong end of the stick regarding Tina, and his reaction to the vapo rape and Sam teasing Tina. Watch it again, Blaine isn’t upset.

There’s a lot I could go into about his relationship with Kurt but it’s already a long ask. Please feel free to chat to me about any of these!!! I note you think Blaine and Puck would be a good friendship, but that’s a chat for another day!!!

Look forward to a pleasant discussion with you!!

I'm fairly new to the Glee fandom, it'll be one year in the summer (I think August?)

It's a mix of canon and headcanons that are heavily supported by canon, I tried to specify what is what.

Most of the people I've seen that don't like Blaine or only like him in season 2 say he's whiny and clingy, and I'm happy to see that not a lot of people on Tumblr say that. More people do on Instagram, which is where I see most of the hate directed at him (he's still very popular there though!)

I've seen a lot of people say that he's mostly himself in the later seasons, it may not have been a mask at Dalton and could have been a personality change maybe impacted by the environment/who he surrounded himself with. In a deleted scene it says that his mom (maybe both parents? I just remember his mom specifically) isn't home much because of work - but I usually think that she's home late at night and on most weekends (nothing to support it, just what I think)

For the school dances, that is pretty likely, but the Sadie Hawkins specifically could have also brought certain memories back. I won't go into detail but I also have a bad experience related with a certain type of event, similar events don't bring back memories but that one specifically does, it does depend on the person though.

I think it depends on the person if he had a close relationship with them. Trent, for example, yes, but this is supported the most by canon. I also believe he was close with Nick and Jeff, but that's not as supported, and looked up to David, Wes, and Thad. But I don't really see them spending much time with him.

I don't think Blaine did have a drinking problem, I tried to specify that in the analysis but I think I wasn't clear because you're the second person to ask about that, just that he may have picked up the coping mechanism when he was in a bad place but to a lesser extent. The reason I think his mom may be is because (again, deleted shot) there was a shot in which Puck was holding her up and nobody seemed to be in a similar state, Quinn and Santana in I Do weren't as drunk as Pam appeared to be in that shot. But again, since it was deleted, I'm not entirely sure if it counts (I literally forgot it was a deleted shot until I rewatched the episode which is why I didn't point that out.) I do think Blaine and Dave got closer throughout their relationship because it did seem healthy, I don't think Dave was ever abusive because he changed a lot from the beginning of the series. It could have been something Blaine expected knowing his past. During the breakup, Blaine asks if it was something he did, which would be a reason why he'd blame himself. And I also don't think Blaine dated him out of spite, that's very out of character for him. But I've seen a lot of people say they think he might have it that don't like him because he dated Dave. Since writing the analysis (it's been a few months) I actually changed my opinion on Blainofsky, I still don't love it but I don't really hate it either.

In On My Way, he does rub his wrists, but it is kind of hard to see. You have to be watching him closely, and I don't think I would have noticed had it not been pointed out to me. I really think he needed more backstory and more of a look at his mental health - while he does seem happy most of the time, he does have signs of mental illness in his darker times, so it could just be how he feels in that moment, or he could be covering up feelings of depression or anxiety when he seems happier. And Kurt was definitely depressed and suicidal - I meant to write something on him as well but never got to it...

The eating disorder thing has been pointed out by a few other people as well, and a lot of people say it could be just stress eating, or it could be disordered eating which could potentially become an eating disorder had Kurt not intervened. There are warning signs that he could have potentially developed one - most notably a desire for control, which is a very common cause.

I wasn't even going to discuss sexual assault at first, I never considered it. The only reason it was brought up was because of the article I linked in the analysis and every point I made was from there.

And the mention of Tina and the vapo-rape thing, again, you're not the first to mention it so I'm probably wrong about it and I'll admit that. I had it pointed out that he was upset by one person and I haven't seen the episode in a while.

I'll probably look more into the character and update the analysis because lately a lot of people have been asking about it (honestly idk why it's suddenly popular since I did it a while ago but- I'm not complaining!)

Thank you for the ask, I hope I kinda cleared things up... And I appreciate the criticisms and your input!! If you wanna keep talking about this or anything else, feel free to send another ask or DM me :)

[todaydreambelieversfic]

Author Spotlight: Coffeegleek Day 3

Author : @coffeegleek​

How many times do you usually revise your fic/chapter before posting?

At least a few revisions. Then multiple editing passes, and even with my spouse as my proofreader for the past 25+ years, and doing more editing passes before posting to AO3, I still find annoying little typos, sometimes large ones.

If you were to revise one of your older fics from start to finish, which would it be and why?

There was a crack fic I stopped writing years ago. It was a self-challenge during one of those tumblr trope challenges. I was trying to combine all of the tropes into the same fic as they were announced. It got zero traction though so I gave up. I'd love to go back and complete it, make it better. I had the whole thing outlined too.

What do you look for in a beta?

My spouse. We've been together for decades. He's been proofreading my original science fiction work and various fandoms' fanfics since before we were married. He even proofreads my Klaine smut and doesn't blink an eye. (He's a Glee fan too and on tumblr.) He knows what I'm trying to say when I can't find the right words and supplies them. He catches things I don't. What I love the most is for my original work, he's written his own fanfic. It's BAD. It truly is, but it's so heartfelt and earnest. He even came up with a soundtrack should I ever publish my sci-fi novel and the movie or show rights be bought. You really can't get a better beta than that. <3

There’s a number of friends on tumblr that I bounce ideas off of and who give me advice for topics they know far more about than me and google. I try to thank them in my fics.

If you could write the sequel (or prequel) to any fic out there not written by yourself, which would you choose?

I’m going to steal another author’s recent answer and say that I could never do someone else’s work justice. However, I would love to see the author’s ideas for their fics even if they couldn’t write a prequel or sequel.

I suck at remembering titles and author names. There were two political fics that I would love to read more of should their authors ever decide to write in those verses again. One was where Kurt and Blaine's dads were running for president and Kurt and Blaine were along for the ride, staying in the same hotels at time (where they first met,) having to do school remotely, having to be the perfect sons for the press and Blaine being fed up because his parents were conservative Republicans. Then there was another fic where Burt was president and Kurt was the First Son living in the White House, along with Finn, and it was hard to date when your every move is watched by the press.

Do you take liberties with canon or are you very strict about your fic being canon compliant?

I write AU, so canon is only a word often misspelled by me. :) Seriously though, I try to incorporate as many canon elements and characters into my AU fics as I can. It's the kind of AU I like to read as well. What draws me to read and write AUs is taking canon characters, putting them into a different setting, and seeing how they'll react. At their core, they still need to remain the same in principle and have many of the same traits. Like Kurt will always love fashion and be headstrong no matter what. Blaine is always going to have that spark within himself, no matter how depressed or oppressed he gets. Burt and Carole are always going to be loving and nurturing parents at heart. Even in fics where Burt isn't woke, there's a part of him that means well. (Not one of my own fics, but one I read a long time ago.) Different circumstances will change the canon characters and make them react in different ways though. Like, Kurt could end up more withdrawn and hide his love of fashion as a matter of survival and self preservation. He or Blaine could turn into "bad boys." Coach Beiste will always have a heart of gold. Miss Pillsbury will always have a problem with messes. Things like that. I know canon. Give me all the alternate universe versions of it and I will be a happy camper.

Talk about a review that made your day.

I haven't checked for reviews on my fics in ages (because I'm an insecure chicken) so I don't remember any specifically. I do remember there were many that made my day. There are those who take the time to review every chapter. Ones who write only a short note to thank me for writing the fic - both the angsty ones and the cracky fun ones. I love it when someone mentions something that no one else has that I was hoping someone would notice because I was proud of it. I'm not a popular author and don't get a lot of kudos or comments or reblogs compared to many. So each comment and kudos means a lot to me and I'd like to publicly thank every single person who wrote one or hit that kudos button.

Do you ever get rude reviews and how do you deal with them?

I once got a troll who decided it was his job to complain that I had misspelled hors d'oeuvres in one sentence out of an entire verse where the word was written multiple times correctly. It was a series of Klaine Advent one shots for the Empty Nest verse. At first I was shocked and replied with an apology. Then I was, "F this. The person is a troll who didn't read any other part of the fic or verse, just this one quickly written one shot entry, and if all they had to say was that I'd misspelled a commonly misspelled word, then they aren't worth my time." I deleted the comment. There's concrit and trolling. It wasn't concrit.

What advice do you have for people just starting to write?

Have fun writing, even the hard stuff. Know that it's okay to take breaks. Try your best and know you'll get better the more you write and the more you read. Pronouns are your friend and free. Don't put, "I know this is going to suck, so whatever," in your fic description. We all suck at times. It's a part of writing. But if you want folks to read it, using that as your fic's summary isn't the way to go. Just my opinions, which won't even buy you a cup of coffee.

Which fic do you most like to discuss with other people? Why?  

I think it’s pretty obvious from all of my rambling that I enjoy talking about both of my series - Empty Nest verse and A Very Hallmark Christmas verse.  I'm not a popular author and I know my fics, especially the Empty Nest verse ones, aren’t everyone’s thing, so I never get to really discuss them except with friends that I bug to death in private and via long replies to comments on AO3. (You all are saints blessed by all of the good and patient gods.) I have so much to say about them - the process of writing them, the world building, research, and character decisions that went into every single one. I know they’re not perfect. I know the Empty Nest verse grew miles beyond the ficlette about Burt and Carole that it was meant to be. I know my sense of humor in the Hallmark verse isn’t everyone’s thing either. I still worked really hard on them and am glad that I did. Empty Nest let me release a lot of the fear and anxiety I had for my Hispanic and gay son after the 2016 election. The Hallmark ones were a needed break to put some humor into my life. If others enjoyed them, great. If folks want to know more, my inbox is always open.

What's one aspect of writing fic that gets you really excited?

Writing humor even if I'm the only one that finds it funny. As I said above, writing the Hallmark Christmas movie dialogue and plot and the actors as they were filming it was a blast. Writing the commercials was fun and exciting. In my angsty fics, knowing I wrote a good scene, line, or moment that brought out all the feels. That's more of “satisfaction of a job well done” than excited.

***

Check out Coffeegleek’s Fics

Humorous Spooky Drabbles -  Humorous drabbles to spookish type prompts based on a tumblr post called October Drabble Prompts #1 by hallofceleano. The parts in bold and italic are from those prompts. Characters include Kurt, Blaine, Burt, Carole, and Finn. All fun; only #4 has some mild angst. #4 is for snarkyhag and regarding #5 - I know next to nothing about Twilight and had to look up Taylor Lautner on imdb. The liberties I took are my own.

A Very Sloppy Christmas - lucy8675309 posted to tumblr a series of gifs with Kurt dressed up as an elf. It inspired me to write the following prompt, which CoffeeAddict80 encouraged me to write as a fic:

I now want a fic where real Santa’s elf!Kurt gets drunk and vents to Blaine about all the woes of working for Santa. He’s over 100 years old and the outfits are terrible. Why couldn’t they wear clothes like the elves did in that one movie? Drunk elf Kurt has no idea he’s venting to Santa’s son.

Bonus if he wakes up and realizes he just had a drunken one night stand. He isn’t sure who it was with. Only that he’s naked, the guy in the bed beside him is naked and showing off a really great ass. Then said guy turns over and after Kurt’s done staring at his dick, he looks at the guy’s face and realizes who it is.

It’s a Twisted World -  I decided to challenge myself by combining the posted 5 weekly Klaine AU Friday themes and adding another one of my own. So that means: Farm, Fairytale, Vintage (1900’s,) Super Powers, Zombie Apocalypse, and Harry Potter World Klaine with a splash of a fic idea I thought of while in the produce section of the grocery store. Each week, the story will continue, though each part stands alone. This is not a brilliant work of perfectly composed fan fiction. What it is, is fast-paced, cracky fun, with a large dose of innuendo. At least it had my son laughing his ass off. I hope y'all enjoy it too. :)

[angelhummel]

Writing my own lil reviews for the Christmas eps bc I watched them all recently and bc tis the season

A Very Glee Christmas - I actually really like this one. Which I’m sure is surprising since it’s pretty Brittany centric. But this is the first time she’s believed in some magical nonsense so the idea hasn’t worn thin yet. I think it’s cute she believes in Santa. I love her scene with Coach Beiste and with Sue. I love that everyone is so determined to keep her believing in Santa. From going with her to the mall, to convincing Coach Beiste to play the part. There’s a couple of scenes that talk about the magic of Christmas and how it felt on the first Christmas you remember as a kid, and it makes me feel sad in a nostalgic way. The music is mostly forgettable, and obviously BICO is the standout. The Klaine in this episode was brief but iconic, and a big high point of the ep. I also really love Last Christmas. Oh I also really like Rachel this ep. She’s all about keeping everyone’s spirits up and goes out of her way to (try to) get a new tree for the choir room when theirs is ruined. It’s just a nice and good and fun ep and hardly anything about it really bothers me

Extraordinary Merry Christmas - I have waaay more problems with this one, but it’s my favorite solely bc of the Christmas special in the middle. It’s so cheesy and campy and fun. Every song in this episode is just fucking amazing except Blue Christmas but it is a tad bit song heavy for me. And Santa Baby is the one they decide to cut?? Ok... They also cut The Box Scene which fucking suuucks and pisses me off. Also Rachel is at her most insufferable this ep. Which is such a letdown and feels like a giant leap back compared to how she was last Christmas. Preaching about the true meaning of Christmas and Jesus > consumerism is such a boring theme and we don’t need it in every single piece of Christmas media. But yeah even with all my issues, I still love this episode and it’s always been one of my favorites

Glee, Actually - So I lowkey thought I hated this episode but I watched it today and it was pretty good?? I LOVE the Klaine + Burt plot. Jake and Puck are probably my second favorite plot. Then maybe Artie’s dream sequence, then the stuff with Sue and Marley and Millie. And then the Bram nonsense is dead ass last. That’s the only part I really didn’t enjoy, but even then some of it is funny. Also I hate Sue making a hundred fat jokes about Marley’s mom. Like it’s not funny, it’s not clever, can we please stop?? Also the songs are hit or miss for me. It’s my least favorite Christmas Klaine duet but I still like it. I like the Puckerman duet, and the group number at the end. Also Marley’s number is nice, just bc she has such a nice voice. Overall it’s my least favorite Christmas ep but it’s not bad

Previously Unaired Christmas - Yeah sorry I love this one lmao. I mean it’s third on my list but still. It’s technically not canon (tho I wanna pick and choose on that) so it can get as cracky as it wants. Like I know it’s delving into parody territory but there’s still some dumb jokes I roll my eyes at. Like “shut up Blaine”, Kitty being extra racist, and Santana making more jabs about Kurt being a woman than usual. Also Becky is the cringiest she’s ever been and I don’t like how they treated her in the later seasons. But anyway. Everything in NY is gold. The Kurtana, the Pezberry, the Kurtcheltana. All of them dressed as elves. I don’t even care about the Chipmunk Song bc they’re so cute and I love seeing them being drunk and silly. The two Tina/Marley/Unique numbers sound really good and they look great during them. Also I really like Kitty’s plot this ep, idk why. The Christmas tree competition is whatever, but I don’t know. There’s like no stakes and nothing matters but it’s just a fun episode. Everyone is giving it their all and at least they’re having fun with being more campy than usual

[klaineanummel]

looking for something that’ll (never) come 1/6

Blaine Anderson-Chang knows that his crush on his brother’s best friend, straight football star Kurt Hummel, is foolhardy. But every now and then Kurt gives him a look and Blaine can’t help but wonder.

Hey everyone!! Welcome to my newest fic :D This is a fic I’ve been wanting to write for ages, and am finally getting around to hehe it’s a fill for a prompt on the Glee Prompt Meme (link on AO3 and in the sidebar). This fic is complete, and I’m hoping to post it in its entirety over the course of the next two weeks or so. Hope you enjoy!! 

Title from I’ve Been Waiting by Lil Peep

Blaine doesn’t have to be looking at Tina to hear the eye roll in the, “Oh my god,” she lets out when she pulls up in front of Blaine’s house.

Blaine forces his eyes away from the black Escalade parked next to his driveway, turning to his friend with a, “What?”

Tina sighs, leaning her forearms on the wheel. “Blaine.”

“What?” Blaine repeats, knowing he sounds totally unconvincing in his confusion. He knows he sat up a little straighter when he’d seen the car, and he can’t remember doing it but he’s pretty sure he did that little excited wiggle that Tina and Sam are always making fun of him for.

He’s never claimed to be a subtle person.

“Just… chill, okay?”

He rolls his eyes. “I’m chill.”

Tina raises an eyebrow. “You did the wiggle, pal.”

Yep, there it is. “Maybe I’m just excited to be home. Not have to see you anymore today.” He sticks his tongue out as he says it, hoping it will distract her.

This time he does see her roll her eyes. “Sure, Blaine. Whatever you say.”

He sighs, moving his messenger bag strap onto his shoulder and clutching it tight in his lap. He opens the door and sets one foot on the sidewalk. Then, he turns back to her and says, “It’s not because of Kurt.”

She frowns in faux-confusion. “I didn’t say anything about Kurt.”

He groans, and fully steps out of the car. He doesn’t close the door just yet, though, instead leaning against the top of it so he can still see Tina. “Thank you for driving me home.”

“Thank you for helping me pick out my prom dress,” she replies, still staring at him completely unimpressed. She glances past him, to his house, then looks back at him and says, “Text me later, okay?”

He snorts. It’s one of the things he loves most about Tina – she may give him shit, but at the end of the day she lives for the drama. No matter how much she disapproves of his crush, he knows he can always go to her with all the sordid details of whatever minute interaction he is overthinking. It’s great. Like having both the devil and the angel on his shoulder wrapped up in one person.

“You know I will,” he says, winking at her. “See you tomorrow.”

“Bye, Blaine,” she wiggles her fingers as he finally shuts the door.

He heads up to his house, pulling out his keys and turning briefly to give Tina a final wave goodbye as she drives away. He then takes a deep breath and unlocks the door.

The first thing he hears is the sound of the TV from the living room, just a little louder than he knows Mama J likes it. He takes off his outside shoes and slips into his slippers, setting his keys on the hook with his name written above it in Mama P’s neat script.

He decides to drop his things off in his room before braving the living room, so he hurries straight up the stairs. When he reaches the top, he hears a couple of voices saying, “Come on, come on,” followed by a loud cheer a few seconds later. He shakes his head, smiling to himself as he walks into his room.

He hangs up his messenger bag on his coatrack, then heads to his closet, opening the left door so he can see himself in the reflection.

He knows it’s stupid to be concerned about how he looks. Kurt has seen him stumbling out of the bathroom at 2 o’clock in the morning with toothpaste still smeared on his face. He was front and center for the inside-out sweater vest ordeal. He’s even seen Blaine without hair gel, for goodness sake.

Still, he can’t help it. He wants to look nice.

He wants Kurt to think he looks nice.

He fixes his hair a little bit, tucks his polo back into his jeans, and adjusts the cuffs of his jeans slightly. He looks himself over for a moment more, then nods approvingly and closes his closet door, heading back downstairs before he can work himself up too much.

He’s just reached the bottom of the stairs when he hears Mike call out, “Blaine? Is that you?”

Blaine heads to the living room, poking his head in as though he’s just stopping in on the way to the kitchen. “Yeah, it’s me.”

Their living room is full of teenage boys. Three on the couch, two on the loveseat, and Kurt, as always, lounging in the recliner. They all look up at him when he speaks, and Finn even graces him with a wave. Then, as soon as he had the eyes of six football players on him, he no longer does, the pull of the football game far too strong.

As subtly as he can, Blaine flicks his eyes over to where Kurt is sitting, leaned forward with his legs spread wide, elbows rested on his thighs. He’s still watching Blaine, smirking a little, and Blaine looks away quickly, already feeling a blush creeping into his cheeks.

“Hey,” Mike says, grinning at him. He scoots a little down on the couch, forcing Finn and Matt to squish together even more. “You wanna join us?”

Blaine glances at the TV, wrinkling his nose a little. He doesn’t really care for either of the teams playing, and as much as he’d love to be in the same room as Kurt for the next hour or so, he does have a lot of homework to do.

Plus, he’s been informed very indelicately by his friends that he is completely obvious about his crush, and he isn’t sure if he should put himself in a position of being caught staring at Kurt for an hour straight.

“I think I’ll pass for today, but thanks.”

“Aw, come on,” Kurt speaks up, still smirking, and Blaine’s heart skips a beat in his chest. “Bobcats, man. We’re destroying the Ravens.”

Blaine scrunches up his face a bit. “More of a college football guy, to be honest.”

“Dude, he said no,” Finn says, shoving Mike back over on the couch. “There isn’t really any room for him here anyway.”

“Yeah, cause you’re on here,” Mike replies, shoving Finn right back. “Besides, Blaine is small. You could fit two of him where you’re sitting.”

Finn just laughs, but Blaine finds himself blushing a little at that. Small isn’t exactly the word he wants his brother’s friends associating him with. Especially one of them.

“I got tons of room over here,” Kurt says, wiggling his eyebrows.

Now he’s definitely blushing, but he manages to hit back with, “Careful Kurt, I might take you up on that.”

A couple of the guys laugh, but Kurt just keeps watching him, smirk still firmly in place.

God, Blaine cannot figure him out.

Without saying anything else, Blaine removes his head from the living room and heads down to the kitchen. He immediately pulls out a glass and grabs some water from the fridge, sipping it slowly.

The thing is, he knows Kurt’s straight. It’s kind of the biggest reason that Sam and Tina give him so much shit over his crush. And he’s not just like, average straight, he’s really straight. Football player who dates cheerleaders straight. Drives an Escalade straight. Texts girls late at night asking if they’re up with the eggplant emoji straight.

But he also does things like stare at Blaine intensely whilst smirking. Or ask him to share a recliner that’s barely large enough for just Kurt. Or text him whenever he’s drunk, asking why he never comes to parties with Mike. Or get really annoyed when Blaine doesn’t come to one of their football games, and then really excited whenever he does.

He doesn’t want to be that guy that’s constantly wondering what if, especially since he’s specifically heard Kurt call himself heterosexual on multiple occasions and he really wants to respect that, but sometimes he can’t help it.

Maybe it’s just the hopeless romantic in him.

He sets his glass of water by the sink, then walks over to the cupboard Mama J always keeps stocked with junk food and pulls out a half-full pack of Oreos. He picks five out, then puts the pack back and leans against the counter, biting into the first one slowly.

“Yo, Mini AC.”

He looks up, eyes wide as Kurt walks into the kitchen. He has to force himself not to obviously check Kurt out, but it’s so hard because, damn, he had not noticed earlier exactly how tight the t-shirt Kurt is wearing is.

“Hey,” Blaine replies after swallowing the cookie in his mouth. Kurt walks right up to him until he’s leaning next to Blaine on the counter.

He grins down at Blaine, then reaches out and steals one of Blaine’s Oreos. It brings their bodies slightly closer, their hips now brushing together ever so slightly.

Blaine is pretty sure he’s no longer breathing.

“You’re weird, you know that?”

“Huh?” It comes out like an exhale of breath.

“Why do you always eat your snacks in the kitchen?” Kurt takes a bite out of his cookie. “A normal person,” he continues, mouth full of cookie, “would grab his snacks and,” he swallows, “take them up to his room. Or out into the living room, where his friends are.”

Blaine swallows thickly. “Well,” he says, tongue feeling thick as he watches Kurt pop the other half of the Oreo into his mouth. “I don’t like to eat in my room because I hate crumbs. And, uh,” he glances at the doorway just as a loud cheer erupts form the living room. “You guys are really more Mike’s friends. Don’t want to cramp his style.”

“You hate crumbs,” Kurt mutters, grinning and shaking his head. “You’re really something else.”

Blaine presses his lips together to stop the ear-to-ear grin he can feel himself wanting to break into.

“But you’re wrong about the second part,” Kurt says, leaning over to steal another one of Blaine’s cookies. “We’re your friends, too. I mean, christ, we’ve been parking our asses on that couch for like ten years now. You even join us sometimes,” he nudges Blaine with his elbow, and it pushes him away just a little bit. Blaine immediately misses the warmth of Kurt’s body, and wonders if there’s a subtle way he can get close again.

“Sure,” is all he manages to say.

Kurt shakes his head, chuckling. “You coming to the game Saturday?”

Normally Blaine would play coy, see if he can get a reaction out of Kurt by saying he won’t, but, well. He can’t really pretend given what game it is. “You guys are up for the championship. Obviously, I’ll be there.”

Kurt nods. “Good. Need my good luck charm, you know.”

And that’s another thing that confuses Blaine. Because no matter what girl Kurt is currently dating, or sleeping with, or pursuing, he always calls Blaine his good luck charm. And every single time Blaine attends a game and they win, the very first thing that Kurt does is look for him in the audience and point directly at him.

Sam tells him it’s a superstitious thing, but Blaine can’t help but wonder.

“Oh, good, you’re still here,” Blaine looks away from Kurt, surprised to see Finn walking into the kitchen, too. Without thinking, Blaine inches ever so slightly further away from Kurt.

“Hey, Finn,” he says.

“Yeah, hey,” Finn waves a dismissive hand. “Look, you remember the game last weekend? Against Dalton?”

Blaine frowns, then glances up at Kurt confused. He’s hoping it’ll be a small moment of comradery between the two at Finn’s strange question, but instead he finds that any trace of a smile has disappeared from Kurt’s face. His jaw is actually jutting out a little, and he’s sending Finn a fairly icy glare.

It just makes Blaine frown more as he turns back to Finn with a, “Yeah, why?”

“Well,” Finn continues, clearly completely oblivious to Kurt’s stare. “I went to camp a few years ago with the Dalton quarterback, Sebastian Smythe. He noticed you when you came onto the field to congratulate us and thought you were really cute.”

Blaine’s eyebrows shoot up at that. “What?” He hadn’t really been paying attention to anything other than the fact that as soon as he stepped foot on the field Kurt immediately ran up to him and picked him up in a way-too-tight hug that literally swept Blaine off his feet.

“He asked if I knew you and if you’d be interested in getting coffee with him sometime,” Finn is wiggling his eyebrows as he says it, and Blaine feels his heartrate going up a little bit.

“Well, I mean,” Blaine glances up at Kurt again, and yeah, Kurt is definitely glaring at Finn. “I don’t really know him. Or what he looks like.”

“Dude, he’s totally hot for a guy,” Finn says. “And he’s like, nice and stuff. You’ll like him, for real.”

Blaine presses his lips together. He glances up at Kurt again. Kurt, who he has had a crush on for over a year. Kurt, who confuses him. Kurt, who hugs him like he’s the only person who exists but then hooks up with a cheerleader later in the night.

He’s never really been asked out before. Is he really going to say no because of a guy who can’t even return his feelings?

“Uh, sure,” he finally says, shrugging.

Finn does a tiny fist pump. “Sweet! I’ll send him your number and you can fix something up. You’ll seriously like him a lot, I swear dude.”

“Great,” Blaine says, giving a weak smile. “I’m looking forward to it.”

Finn grins at him, then turns around and leaves again. Blaine looks back up at Kurt as he goes, hoping the iciness will have left his eyes, but it hasn’t. Instead, he’s still glaring daggers where Finn just was, and his arms have come up to cross over his chest.

“That was weird, huh?” Blaine says, hoping to diffuse some of the tension. “I mean, I don’t think I’ve ever—”

“Yeah,” Kurt cuts him off. “Right. Look, I’m missing the game, so.”

He pushes off from the counter and walks out of the kitchen without even giving Blaine a chance to respond.

“Right,” Blaine says, though he knows Kurt won’t be able to hear him. “Bye, then,” he says to nobody, eyes falling down to the cookies in his hands.

He sighs, shoves one in his mouth and leaves the kitchen, eating the other one as soon as he swallows the first one.

He really hopes that Tina is home by now, because he doesn’t think just texting her is going to suffice this time.

[lady-divine-writes]

Klaine one-shot “Roached” (Rated PG13)

Summary:

Blaine is trying to help Kurt 'heal' from his past break ups over Valentine's Day in an unusual way. But things go off the rails when Kurt decides not to heal from his relationships with an ex, but his relationship with one of his best friends. (1696 words)

Notes: Inspired by this https://www.cbsnews.com/news/el-paso-zoo-name-a-cockroach-after-your-ex-feed-to-meerkat-valentines-day-feb-14/. I did write another one-shot for another pairing inspired by it, but this is nowhere near the same at all.

Read on AO3.

“You know what?” Kurt says, lowering the lid to his laptop. “I’ve changed my mind. I don’t want to do this.”

“Why not?” Blaine asks, catching his fiancé’s hand before the lid reaches the keyboard.

“Because there’s no one I can think of who deserves to have a Madagascar Hissing Cockroach named after them and then fed to a meerkat!”

“Come on, Kurt! There has to be someone!”

Kurt glares at Blaine, confounded by his bizarre giddiness over the prospect. “Is there something you and I need to talk about?”

“What do you mean? I’m just trying to find a way to help you heal.”

“Call me crazy, but for me, healing has nothing to do with roaches.”

“This will be fun! I promise!”

“Blaine – it’s Valentine’s Day. Fun on Valentine’s Day usually includes a romantic meal, a stroll through the park, a roll in the hay …”

“Let’s do this first, and then we can go make love or something.”

“Oh dear Lord …”

“First, let’s go down the line of men who’ve done you wrong.”

Kurt crosses his arms over his chest as Blaine pulls up a chair. “Well, if we’re talking about men I’ve dated, the only one that’s done me wrong is you.”

“But I’m not an ex …

“You were.”

“I’m not now, so I don’t qualify.” Blaine opens the laptop again and rubs his hands together. “How about Adam? He threw you out of the Apples when we got back together.”

“I don’t see that as a roach-able offense.”

“Elliott?”

“We never dated.”

“Walter?”

“He was a decent guy. He’s partially the reason why I came to my senses about you so I don’t think you want to throw him to the meerkats.”

“True …”

Blaine switches tabs on the screen, giving Kurt a ring-side seat to the action unfolding – a view into the meerkat enclosure at the Central Park Zoo, where the furry residents chow down on scurrying insects. As a roach drops into the habitat, the name of the unfortunate victim scrolls across the screen, along with the name of the person who nominated it. A new roach gets tossed in. The camera zooms in on it – a large oval of a creature, with long antennae, furry legs, and a strange, pale mark on its back that looks strikingly similar to a carousel horse. It races across the ground straight to an abandoned raspberry and perches upon it. A group of meerkats surround it, but instead of being concerned, it begins to clean itself with swipes of its antennae, hissing as if doing vocal warmups, preparing to sing for its encroaching audience. For some reason, the name ‘Roach-el Berry’ pops into Kurt’s brain, and he snickers.

“Too bad I can’t pick Rachel. Wouldn’t that be ironic?”

A slow grin burns on Blaine’s face. “Why can’t you? You guys have definitely had the tumultuous relationship. If nothing else, she invalidated your run for student body president, she was part of the reason you didn’t make it into NYADA the first go around, and … well …”

“Well …?”

“She kissed me, remember? Twice.”

“To be fair, you kissed her the first time, too.”

“I was drunk.”

“You were both drunk, and it was still mutual. You and I had a huge fight over it.”

“Potato, po-tah-to …”

Kurt side-eyes Blaine. Blaine shudders

“What?”

“You know, the argument for naming a roach after you is getting stronger by the minute.”

“You could name it after Santana,” Blaine says, swiftly moving the subject away from himself. “Or Sue Sylvester.”

“I wouldn’t do such a horrible thing to an innocent little roach. Why are you so obsessed with my exes anyway? Don’t you have anyone you want to see roached?”

“Already taken care of,” Blaine says with an abundance of glee. “Earlier on today, cockroach Eli and Jeremiah met their respective makers. I have it recorded if you want to see.”

“A world of no.” Kurt goes silent, peering at the webcam image as another wave of cockroaches are brought in for the sacrificial feast. The thinking going on behind Kurt’s eyes begins to terrify Blaine. When Kurt opens his mouth to speak, Blaine is sure he’s a goner. “Okay. Rachel Berry it is.”

“Excellent!” Blaine puts his hands over the keyboard, itching to submit the name. Kurt clears his throat, and Blaine stops. With a nervous chuckle, he slides the computer closer to Kurt. “Oh, yeah. Here – you do the honors.”

“First it was birds, now insects,” Kurt says, beginning to type. “We really need to talk about your fetish issues.”

Before he can second-guess himself, he types the name Rachel Berry in the blank space under Cockroach, and his name under submitted by. He doesn’t understand why he feels anxious. There’s absolutely no way she’ll ever know about this. It’s a prank, harmless fun, and way for him to cleanse himself of the drama and tension that’s hung between them during the tenure of their relationship. Like Blaine said (even if Kurt doesn’t entirely agree with him) it’s a way to heal. Just something he can reflect on and laugh at the next time he and Rachel get into an argument and she gets high-pitchy and red-faced. He’ll just take that face and stick it on to the mental image of a bulbous roach with her name getting devoured by meerkats. Then whatever they’re angry over will seem like no big thing.

Because most of the time, it isn’t.

He clicks submit and holds his breath.

It takes about ten minutes, but his entry pops up at the bottom of the screen – Rachel Berry: submitted by Kurt Hummel. It shows up during a lull in the feeding. A technician manning the computer on the zoo’s end sees it, nods, then goes to pick out Kurt’s cockroach. And again, since there’s a lull, the man at the zoo makes a meal of it, plucking out the plumpest roach and holding it out to the webcam.

“Say hello to the world, little Rachel Berry,” the man says in a sing song voice. “Except now, we’re going to call you lunch. Come along little Rachel Lunch. Berry Lunch. Rachel Berry Lunch …”

“That’s in slightly poor taste,” Kurt comments, but he can’t help laughing. Blaine guffaws to the point of choking, tears streaming down his face. The tech tosses Rachel (or Roach-el, since that name’s stuck in Kurt’s mind and he can’t get it out) into the enclosure, and even though there are already a horde of roaches inside, one particularly lithe meerkat with sleek brown fur pounces on her.

Kurt and Blaine leap into one another’s arms, yelping at the brutal quickness of it.

The meerkat holds Roach-el in its paws, squeezing tight while the thing hisses like a tea kettle on maximum overdrive, struggling with all its might to get away. The meerkat, looking honestly annoyed by the roach’s antics, bites off its head with an oddly amplified crack!

“Ah!” Kurt and Blaine groan.

The roach’s body continues to squirm while the meerkat, unfazed, leisurely enjoys its snack.

Kurt’s stomach makes a displeased noise.

“Okay, I think I’m going to be sick.”

“Same,” Blaine agrees with a hard swallow. “But don’t you feel better?”

Kurt shakes his head at his insane fiancé, but he finds himself laughing again. “Yeah. Call me crazy, but I do feel a little better.”

“Good,” Blaine says, kissing Kurt on the forehead. “That’s all I wanted.”

“Yeah. Right.”

Bzzz-bzzz. Bzzz-bzzz.

“Ugh!” Kurt lowers the top to his computer. “I can’t listen to anymore bug crunching noises.” The laptop lip closes with a click, but the buzzing noise continues.

Bzzz-bzzz. Bzzz-bzzz.

“That’s not the computer, hon. That’s your phone. Over on the sofa.”

“Oh.” Kurt picks his cell up off the futon across the room and looks at the screen. His eyebrows snap together in the middle, and he gasps. “It’s Rachel!”

Kurt and Blaine share a look, but Blaine immediately waves Kurt’s concern away. “Don’t worry about it. That’s just … a weird coincidence. You know what they say – speak of the devil? I mean, why the heck would she …?”

“She wouldn’t! She doesn’t like roaches! Or zoos! Besides, it’s noon on Valentine’s Day! Do you mean to tell me that instead of going out on a romantic lunch date with Finn, she’s sitting at their apartment watching a webcam?”

Blaine shrugs, but when he talks, his voice shakes. “We are.”

The call goes to voicemail. Kurt holds his breath.

Please don’t call again, he prays to himself. Please just send a picture of whatever corny thing you and my brother are doing right now that has absolutely nothing to do with me naming a hissing cockroach after you and then watching that roach being fed to …

Bzzz-bzzz. Bzzz-bzzz.

The name Rachel Berry pops up on his screen, along with a picture of her beaming face, and Kurt sighs.

“You know,” he says, holding the phone out to Blaine, “this was your stupid idea. You should be the one to talk to her.”

“It’s your phone,” Blaine says, climbing onto the futon and covering himself with pillows in an attempt to hide. Kurt rolls his eyes. When his fiancé went insane, he’ll never know, but this is the last time he lets Blaine pick what they do for Valentine’s Day.

Kurt takes a moment to compose himself, plans what he’s going to say, then answers the phone. “Hello?”

She doesn’t let him get farther than that.

“Kurt Hummel!” Rachel’s voice booms from Kurt’s phone. “Did you just name a roach after me and then have me eaten by a rat?”

“Uh …” Kurt feels his body go cold from the top of his head to his feet. “Yes, I did,” he says as he races to the kitchen, speaking at Mach 10 as he goes, “but it was only a joke, I never thought you’d see it, I love you very much, it was all Blaine’s idea, HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY!”

“Wha---?“ He hears her squeak before he hangs up the call and tosses his phone into the freezer before she can call back.

[what-if-rpg]

Welcome to the family, B! Your application to COOPER ANDERSON was accepted, as well as the changes. I am really happy to have you around! Make sure to read the beginners checklist, and remember, have fun! I can’t wait to roleplay with you! Have fun!

IN CHARACTER

CHARACTER NAME: Cooper James Anderson. CHARACTER AGE & DATE OF BIRTH: 27 / 18th January 1992. OCCUPATION: Actor and Musician. (Broadway) FACE CLAIM: Brendon Urie. HOMETOWN & CITY WHERE LIVES NOW: Boston MA, New York City. SEXUAL ORIENTATION & GENDER: Bisexual and Male. RELATIONSHIP STATUS: In a Relationship. POSITIVE TRAITS: Loyal, Caring, Passionate. NEGATIVE TRAITS: Hot-tempered, Impulsive, Arrogant. CHARACTER QUOTE/LYRIC: Now I’m gonna fuck up a hotel lobby. ANYTHING ELSE?: FC change please!

HEADCANONS

Cooper has always dreamed of the arts after growing up with his passions fuelled by his mother. He is a multi-instrumentalist who writes music as a hobby. The man has a band named Saint!California who regularly releases music. Cooper makes appearances as a singer but is torn on where his loyalties lie in his career. He feels tied to Broadway by more than one thing but often thinks he should move away from it and pursue music full time. The band seem to be in demand and he is proud of the work he has created, leaving him with guilt over the lack of attention he gives it. Cooper has become rather fond of the stage, escaping as someone else for a few hours each night can help with the confusion he finds himself clouded by, it’s a good compromise…. for now.

As a child, Cooper shined in a local stage school he attended on weekends. The boy was picked up for multiple commercials and his acting resume grew more and more. When he reached High School, he had an arrogance and ego around him though being turned down for a role in the school’s production of Grease had him swear off musical theatre. Cooper went in a mood with all things musical, including Broadway. After graduating, he left Boston for Hollywood and spent six long months scrapping around for work. His agent then turned his attention to New York with an audition as a swing in Newsies. The nineteen year old turned his nose up at the offer immediately, though after long conversations with his mother and agent, they suggested he bite the bullet and try it out. It would give him a step into the industry as his mother said, he was “only nineteen, he had time to be in line for the next Oscar.” Now, Cooper feels like he’d gotten lost in Broadway. He does enjoy it though he also wonders What if? What if something else had happened instead?

Cooper has a few different ticks about him. He’s a bit of a mess when you look close enough. His biggest fear is not being able to escape situations. When in the middle of an argument, Cooper will often storm out of a room and leave for a few hours. He needs to feel as though he can remove himself from a situation otherwise it sends him into a flurry of a panic. Paparazzi is one thing that Cooper internally struggles with. On the outside, he’s all smiles and cheery tones though he’s battling a fight inside him. Cooper is very open with his fans and they usually hold great respect for him. The paparazzi are ones who care less about his personal space and more about capturing the right photo. It’s a part of his life that he tries to avoid as much as possible, if and when he can.

You’ll be pushed to find someone who loves their fans more than Cooper does. With an addiction to Instagram, his fans are never shy of content and the latest smiling selfie. The man also takes a great fondness to Instagram Live where he will sit and talk to fans while cooking or waiting in his dressing room. Cooper is one to hold free signing events and concerts when possible, which he funds himself. Though raised in a middle class, it’s his mother’s roots that bring him back down to that humble level. The eldest Anderson holds great appreciation to those around him and does his best to give back as often as he can, whatever the cost.

CONNECTIONS

PARENTS: Pamela and Richard Anderson. Born to middle-class parents, Pam (a children’s book author) and Richard (a renowned lawyer) Cooper is probably the biggest Momma’s boy you’ll ever come across. After the family struggled to conceive, the news of their first child brought them so much joy. Pam always had a soft spot for the eldest who adored her more than anything. Pam is someone Cooper will often turn to for advice or comfort but his father and he hold a tense relationship. Richard has always pushed a lot of high expectations on his eldest and when he grew less and less like the young lawyer his father dreamed of, he became cold towards him. Though his father and he don’t get along, the only joint interest the two share are working lazy Sundays in the garage on old cars. Cooper became a bit of a grease monkey during the summer and when he was fourteen, he fixed up his grandfather’s old 1965 Ford Mustang. Even though he’s moved out of the house, he’s still close to his mother and always go home for the holidays. Christmas isn’t the same without his family. SIBLING: Blaine Anderson. The two Andersons have always held an interesting relationship. Cooper truly does care about Blaine, maybe a little too much that he often pushes his little brother to achieve his potential. Ultimately though, they hold a true brotherly relationship. Cooper loves nothing more than winding up his younger sibling and teasing him. At the end of the day, Cooper will jump into a fight to defend his brother in a heartbeat. Family is important to him. BOYFRIEND: Jesse St. James. Broadway was a daunting place for the new actor and starting a big show such as Les Miserables couldn’t be more than intimidating. Befriending an experienced actor hadn’t been his worst idea. That was until one night at a cast party, six months into their friendship and the show, the two shared a drunken kiss. He can’t really tell you when they started ‘dating’ behind closed doors but he knows he’s conflicted. Giving into Jesse’s advances, he finds feeling like a dirty secret eats away at his conscience, as well as the drama happening in Jesse’s life, he never knows where he stands. After Jesse’s divorce was filed, his cast-mate moved in with and within months they became official. It was a relationship the fans generated and they melted into. Cooper knows he has at least some feelings for his cast mate who have become something of a Broadway Duo, appearing regularly in shows together that only appeals further to the fans. Now eleven months into dating officially, he finds himself bickering with his boyfriend with a few treasured moments in-between. Cooper can’t decide if he wants to get out of this relationship but he finds himself falling back into that man’s life, even if it’s not a completely happy one. BEST FRIEND: Ellie Weeks [NPC]. A friend he grew up with after she moved to Boston from London. He attended school with her and the two are incredibly close. She’s someone who has seen every side to him; giggly; upset; moody; or blackout drunk on the floor. Cooper runs most of his big ideas past her and she’s more often than not, the one to intervene on his impulsive ideas. She knows him inside out and adores his friendship, he’s like her adopted American brother. Ellie is one of the few people who sees through the lines with Jesse and Cooper’s relationship. She is not fond of the other man by any means but holds her tongue for Cooper’s sake. She has warned him enough but trusts when he tells her “I’m fine, El, trust me.” She can’t help but worry about him getting hurt. RIVAL: Wanted Connection [UTP]. Someone Cooper can’t stand. They know how to get his back up and provoke the hot-tempered attitude in him. The mention of their name can draw a scowl to his face and he will easily rise to the bait. The two often find each other by chance and there’s always some sort of tension or altercation when they’re in the same room. As of late, they’ve ended up seeing more and more of each other and Cooper can only grumble about it.

[lurkinmerkin]

So I’m doing some math (I’m terrible at it) but nonetheless, I did some thinking and then some subtraction and realized that it was in about 1998 that my family got a computer with Microsoft Windows installed along with a dial-up internet connection. And so this is technically my 20th anniversary of reading fanfic and being a part of internet fandom. I figured I should celebrate it a bit. 

I don’t remember the exact date or time or whatever, I can barely add or subtract, so June seems like a good in the middle of the year kind of time to recollect and think about what I’ve been doing with my life. Think about why I read so much, why I reblog things, why I am the way I am. 

This ask meme was written by @mabel-but-slytherin​ and I decided, I’ll just answer the whole damn thing. I’m sure absolutely no one is interested in this info but I don’t give a fuck. 20 goddamn years of my life in fandom, do you seriously think I give a fuck anymore? I don’t care about you or your eyes. I officially left the give a fuck building a long ass time ago.

If you have seen a fandom ask meme about being a lurker (which I was for a good ten years) or about reading fanfic instead of just writing fanfic, send it my way and I’ll answer it too. I have stories.

1. What was your first fic and could you stand to reread it today?

It was Thursday Night Routine and it’s readable but I find it a bit repetitive and out of character. Although, with Glee, how was I supposed to know who these people would become, lol. ;A;

2. What’s your most recent fic and how far do you think you’ve come?

My most recent was Vesper Lynde for the Spy fandom and I think I’ve grown as a writer but my characterization is still clumsy and my comedy isn’t as sharp. I think I was funnier before. I also have issues getting to the sex scene that I never had before. It drives me batty.

3. In your opinion, what’s your best fic?

The thoroughly depressing and out of nowhere for me fic, Ozma. That night was a eureka moment, it was bliss writing that fic. It flowed. I probably got the closest to american gothic and poetry with that fic--which is my usual goal when I do creative writing off the internet. 

4. In your opinion and without looking at any numbers, what’s your most popular fic?

So much of what I wrote was done anonymously before AO3 and Tumblr so it’s hard for me to say but I’m gonna guess Everybody’s Pickin’ Up on that Feline Beat because the cat!boi thing really slapped. Like people loooooved the cat!boi thing in 2010. 

5. Is there any fic that makes you super happy to reread and remember you wrote that?

Third is the One With the Treasure Chest. It has some issues but I still can’t believe I wrote it, like that was my third fanfic ever and it was a muppet babies’ orgy. I have no idea how I did it, :D

6. Is there any fic that makes you super embarrassed to reread and remember you wrote that?

Not really? I’m not embarrassed by what I write (I can’t be, I write weird shit), but I don’t necessarily want people to come up to me in real life and start describing my fic to me. Like I don’t want my realities to intersect. That’s what I’m really sure would embarrass me. 

7. What’s the fic you most want to continue (unfinished or no)?

I’m not gonna finish it, like it’s not happening, but I kind of wish I had finished Look What You Made Me Do. I still noodle a about Sarah Plain and Tall Klaine story. I did a lot of research into Gilded era hair and fashions.

8. What’s the oldest (longest since last update) fic you most want to continue (unfinished or no)?

Probably the epically awful and creepy Matchmaker, Matchmaker, Make me a Match where Sandy and Karofsky kidnap and assault Kurt. I was fascinated by how absolutely horrific Sandy Ryerson was as a character. He’s the worst. I’m not doing a sequel though. I’m not.

9. Have you ever written for a fandom without watching/reading/playing the source material?

Read? Yes. Written? No. I don’t think I’m the best at characterization but I do feel a need for a basic grasp on it before I start writing anything. 

10. Have you ever written for a fandom without reading other fanfic for it?

I wrote Vesper Lynde before I read any of the fic which was probably a good thing because there are some really good fics out there that already cover the subject I did (and did it better). But I’m glad I wrote it anyway because I have so many feelings about Rayna and Susan.

11. Have you ever written a fic for a concept you know someone else has done before? How did it impact your writing process or feelings after posting?

I honestly don’t know so I’m going to say no. I have seen these stories after I wrote what I wrote and have thought, Oh I should have done that or why didn’t I think of that?, but I have never seen a fic beforehand and thought that I could do it better or different enough. I wrote fic in order to fill a gap of weird skullfuckery that was missing before I showed up. 

12. Have you ever written a fic and decided never to publish it? Why?

Yes. It was bad, I wrote myself into a corner and had no interest in fixing it. The writing felt dull and flat. If I post an unfinished work, I do it because I think the writing has merit. 

13. What’s the biggest change between your style when you started in fandom and today?

I write more original work now, I write poetry mostly nowadays. And fanfic I do write has been smaller vignette pieces, has had way less sex in it and minimal wacky shenanigans. I kind of want to go back to wacky shenanigans honestly.

14. What’s the biggest change in your taste between when you started in fandom and today?

I’m riding a girl swing this year so I’m way more interested in stories that involve cunnilingus and strap-ons, boob devotionals and short fingernails. I sort of got into that in the middle of my Glee career (the Golden Age) before swinging back to boys and their balls (the Modern Age). In this new Age, I’m back to ladies. 

15. Have you ever purposefully written one fandom/fic idea over another because you knew it’d be more popular?

I think I tried to do that once but then I failed because my niche is being an off-beat weird motherfucker, not popular. I thought that I’m Not a Girl, Not Yet a Woman would go awf but instead it fizzled. So I stuck with dickpunching.

16. Have you ever stopped writing a fic/for a fandom because it wasn’t receiving enough attention?

No. I didn’t really get a lot of attention outside my circle anyway.

17. In your opinion, what’s your most overrated fic?

I guess the Cat!Kurt fic? I think it’s a good story, I just think that I wrote some that were better.

18. What’s your most underrated fic?

And if the world runs out of lovers, my Blaine/Finn fic. I had a lot of fun with that one and I think I got some really funny lines in. 

19. If you had to pick one fic/scene/chapter of your work to describe your entire portfolio to a stranger, which would you pick?

I would say, They’re Both Just Full of Feelings, OK? which is a story were Puck and Mercedes get very drunk, complain about their homosexual tendencies and then motorboat each others tiddies. I feel like that about covers the gist of my aesthetic.

20. Have/Would you ever rewrite a fic? If yes, would you take the original down?

I am doing a slow ass sloow rewrite of As Needed, just some clean up of tense issues and little nudges here and there of some of the wording. And I will take down the original when I do that. It needs better grammar, it does.

21. If someone starts kudosing and commenting your fics in a spree and has a few works of their own, would you go look through theirs?

Yes. I love spying and I love other people’s bookmarks. I keep mine private because I’m a hypocrite and I don’t know how to make them public en masse. I am not doing that individually.

22. Has there ever been anyone who’s made you freak out because they read your work and followed/favorited/reviewed?

No, but I freak out at every follow/favorite/review regardless. There are people who I love love love but they aren’t in the fandoms I write in so I never expect to have an insane fangirl moment like that.

23. What’s the nicest review you’ve ever gotten?

When I wrote Ozma, someone on the kinkmeme said that it read like a contemporary short story and I was flattered!

24. What’s the meanest review you’ve ever gotten? Do you think the reviewer intended it?

25. What constructive criticism, however well-meaning, always makes you feel bad when you see it in a review?

Gosh, that’s tough. I’m gonna go with criticisms that question your intent? Like when someone goes, “Did you mean to say this or that?” but not because it makes me feel bad but more because it makes me feel like I didn’t get my point across clearly enough that the reader could make their own conclusions about what was happening. I am very much of the author is dead style and part of that is leaving enough there to satisfy the reader without giving it all away.

26. What aspect of your writing do you most enjoy to see praised?

My humor. I like it when people find me funny. I don’t feel like my humor makes sense a lot of the time. Also, when people say that they re-read my stories. That’s always a heart warmer.

27. If you could only ever write crossovers or single-fandom fics ever again, which would you pick?

I prefer single-fandom fics as a writer. Crossovers get messy for me, too many locations to choose from.

28. if you could only ever write for a single crossover or a single fandom again, which would you pick?

Schitt’s Creek. David/Patrick 4eva!

29. Does the division of your writing across fandoms line up with your reading? What’s the biggest discrepancy?

Absolutely not, LMAO! I have done way more reading than writing in any fandom. My participation is a pebble on a mountainside.

30. Do you continue to write for a fandom after you’ve moved on or do you focus solely on the new one?

I wrote Glee fic (and I am still working on As Needed) after I had moved on from the show but a lot of us did. My attention span allows me to multifandom.

31. Who’s the one character you’ve just never managed to get perfectly right?

Susan Cooper. She’s an enigma.

32. Who’s the one character who shines without you even trying?

Puck, I feel like I wrote a very solid Puck.

33. Is there any particular character whose scenes always wind up being longer/more frequent than you expected? Does the quality hold up?

I would guess Brittany but I don’t think the quality holds up. I liked writing Brittany but I don’t think I captured her essence.

34. Was there any fic that you wrote that really surprised you in the fandom reaction? Was it just by the numbers or did they take it an entirely different way?

I get a lot of requests for a sequel to Sex Bomb even to this day and it surprises me.

35. Have you ever written a ship into a fic without meaning to?

No, I was ready to write anyone with anyone in any fic. I love it.

36. Have you ever sincerely written a ship you do not support into a fic?

Don’t support? Well, I don’t support Kurt/Karofsky but I write non-con fic so...

37. Have you ever purposefully bashed a character/ship in a fic?

I would only in an in-character sense, like the character would be against that pairing because of the show dramatics. At least, that was always my intent.

38. Have you ever purposefully written something you know your readers would find uncomfortable/would not enjoy? If yes, why?

Because that’s how the glee_anon meme worked sometimes LOL. Sometimes, you gotta have the anal worm lay the eggs.

39. Do you consider yourself to have a readership?

Not anymore lol, if I ever did. I don’t write enough.

40. Do you feel like you put out enough content?

I peaked with the Muppet Babies’ orgy, that was my third fic. Everything else was gravy.

41. If you cross-post your fics on multiple sites, do you have a favorite? Are there certain fics you would only post on certain site?

I want all my fics on AO3 largely because I think livejournal is gonna die soon and tumblr is unsearchable and lacks a forum function. 

42. How many views has your most popular fic gotten?

(Based on AO3): Ozma at 28672 Hits

43. Your least popular?

(Based on AO3): There’s a Lobster Involved at 38 Hits

44. Do you follow/favorite/kudos/comment/review more stories than you have received?

Oh gosh, I never thought of it that way but I hope I at least kudos more than I’ve received! I don’t have that many bookmarks and I don’t review and I rarely comment (I’m more like to DM you) but I do leave kudos a lot.

45. If you had to call yourself an author of a single genre (besides fanfic) what label would you give yourself?

With my original works: poetry. With my fanfic works: absurdism

46. Do you consider yourself a diverse author?

Yeah, I think I covered a wide range of topics and styles along with a lot of different characters. I had humor, drama, horror, angst, slice of life, porn, I covered a lot of ground.

47. If someone you know in real life who isn’t involved in fandoms asked to read your work, would you let them? If yes, what would you recommend they read first?

NO.

48. Does anyone you know from outside of fandom know you write fanfic? Are they involved in the same fandom too?

Yes, they know and they were also Glee fans but not necessarily fanfic readers. Just how much they know will remain a mystery between us because they won’t tell me and I won’t ask them to tell me. I don’t need that knowledge and I don’t want it.

49. Has anyone in your life ever read your fanfic just because you wrote it?

NOT THAT I KNOW OF AND I DON’T WANT THEM TO TELL ME IF THEY DID. KEEP IT TO YOURSELF.

50. Has writing fanfic had a significant impact on your life? Would you say it’s entirely positive?

I have an absolutely incredible circle of friends that I would not have had without fandom. So many people that I know out of fandom don’t spend as much time on the internet, they aren’t as easy to reach as my internet friends. You guys give me your time and your energy and that means so much to me. It really does. 

I wouldn’t say my time in fandom has been 100% positive. There are always downfalls to being in a large group. I have had my moments of internet drama, on anon trolling, and bad feelings. But my friends make it all worth it. You guys are the best.

[forabeatofadrum]

Klaine Summer Challenge Day 6: Heatwave

“But Yuè, it’s fucking October!” I know, so enjoy summer for now.

Based on these tweets and a little bit on the New Years arc of Dalton.

Klaine Summer Challenge Day 6: Heatwave

Don’t pass up this chance  This time it’s true romance

Heatwave - Linda Rontstadt

The adrenaline is almost unbearable. It’s not that Kurt doesn’t like parties, but sometimes, it gets too much. Everyone is dancing around him and Kurt is just going with the flow, like Santana would say.

But Santana is nowhere to be seen.

In fact, Kurt can’t see any of his friends.

Which is kind of unfortunate, since Kurt knows that this isn’t an ordinairy party. It is not New Year’s Eve, but still, on midnight, the lights will go out and everyone is going to kiss someone. 

With the comfort with his friends, he’d be okay, but his friends are missing in action and it’s almost midnight. Maybe Kurt should change his mind and he should try to meet someone, since that is encouraged.

He makes his way to the bar and he’s disappointed when he doesn’t spot any of his friends. He does spot someone else. The stranger seems very bored. His glass is empty, but he’s just staring at it without asking for a refill.

“Having fun?” Kurt decides to ask.

The man looks up in shock. Apparently, the empty glass was very fascinated. Maybe he was pondering about the good old “half full or half empty” question. 

“Not really,” the man replies, “My brother dragged me to this party, but he left me alone.”

“Well, I’m Kurt and I am not having fun either, so let’s hang out.” Kurt has no idea where this sudden confidence is coming from, but he doesn’t mind. This man seems nice and he’s quite cute, especially with that bowtie.

“Nice to meet you, Kurt. My name’s Blaine.”

They talk a little bit and they hit it off. Blaine likes to compose and write music, but he’s still in college so he’s still waiting for his big breakthrough. Kurt’s surprised to hear NYADA rejected him, because Blaine sang a little bit of his work and it’s amazing.

Kurt must admit that he thinks Blaine is very attractive. Maybe his new-found confidence will stay a bit longer, so that he can ask him out.

Suddenly, a DJ yells: “One minute till midnight!”

Blaine’s eyes widen. “Oh shit, the kiss. I had totally forgotten about that.”

“Yeah, it’s a bit weird, don’t you think?” Kurt says when he sees Blaine’s discomfort.

“I mean, are we supposed to just kiss strangers? What if I don’t want to get kissed by some stranger.”

“I agree,” Kurt says, “At least they encourage getting to know new people beforehand, and of course, couples kiss each other all the time, but it’s a bit weird.”

“I’d like to meet the person before I plant my face on theirs,” Blaine says and he looks to Kurt.

Kurt nods to him. There’s some kind of understanding between the two of them.

“Ten more seconds!” the DJ yells and the crowd cheers.

“But if we really have to kiss someone...” Blaine trails off and he blushes.

And Kurt gets it. He can feel himself turn red.

“Five!”

“Well, if you insist.”

“Four!”

Blaine smiles shyly. “If you don’t mind.”

“Three!”

“I don’t mind,” Kurt says, because he really doesn’t. If he has to kiss some stranger, then it better be Blaine.

“Two!”

And Blaine’s smile widens. He takes Kurt by the hand. “Then let’s do it.”

“One!”

For once, the crowd goes silent. People are kissing everywhere. Kurt and Blaine are two of them. After a few seconds, the silence dies away and people start to cheer and party again.

But not Kurt and Blaine. They’re still kissing, completely ignoring the world around them.

Unfortunately, the world doesn’t care. Blaine gets pulled away by another man. “Blaine, little bro, you gotta come with me!” he says, completely unaware that he interruped his brother in a very important moment.

He’s very drunk, because no older brother would just interrupt their brother kissing someone without poking fun at them.

“Coop, wait-”

But it’s too late. The drunken brother drags Blaine with him.

Kurt tries to run after him and it looks like Blaine’s about to saw his brother’s arm off, but the brother happily talks about a beautiful woman he’s met and how he wants Blaine to meet her.

And then they’re gone.

Kurt doesn’t know what to do. He doesn’t sleep. He can’t think.

Ever since the kiss from that mysterious Blaine, he’s unable to function. It’s been less than 24 hours, but he can’t think of anything else.

“And you’re sure you don’t know his last name,” Rachel asks him after Kurt explained all of it to her.

“No,” Kurt sighs, “I guess we were planning it for the longer conversation. But we couldn’t even continue that conversation because that drunken brother dragged him away.”

“Have you tried Twitter?” Santana asks, looking bored.

“Santana, this is serious!” Rachel snaps, “Kurt’s heartsick.”

Santana rolls his eyes. “I am serious,” she says, “Tweet about it and use the hashtag #NYMadness2015. It’s filled with stories and ugly pictures from last night. Look!” She hands her phone to Kurt, who looks away in disgust.

“Yup, that’s a picture of a random dude vomiting all over his probably-now-ex-girlfriend,” Santana says, “See, everyone is still talking about it.”

“Santana, are you kidding?” Rachel protests, but Kurt tells her to shut up.

He doesn’t have much choice now. So he quickly opens his Twitter app and tweets.

Kurt Hummel @someonetocrowdyouwithlove Kissed a boy in #NY last night. Couldn’t get his number. Any1 know Blaine, a composer in the making? NYU? #NYMadness2015

“And now we wait.”

Blaine D. Anderson @forabeatofadrum I don’t think you’ll ever find him ;)

Kurt’s heart jumps when he sees the Tweet.

Kurt Hummel @someonetocrowdyouwithlove Oh hi. I liked your bowtie. Wanna get coffee one day?

“Oh my god,” Rachel almost yells.

Santana smiles smugly. “Nice. You’re gettng laid thanks to Twitter. You can thank me later, you know.”

Kurt’s phone shows another notification. This time it’s a DM from Blaine consisting his number and a message saying: “Text me the address!!”

And Kurt does.

End notes: I seriously used Google to make sure their tweets were under 120 characters and boy, the first one was a challenge. The original one was 158 characters.

[pixiealtaira]

Important Qualities in a friend

Pairing: None.  Friendship fic.  Starring Kurt and Elliot and Dani.

Kurt didn’t actually ever stop and write out what he thought were the most important qualities in a friend until much later in his life than he ought to have, really.  Especially considering he did the whole ‘journal by listing things about yourself’ thing at the start of high school…when one of the online helps he saw said write things down and journal and he himself thought he’d rather not be depressed for life and writing what was upsetting him seemed counterproductive.

He didn’t even think about it at all, except for constantly finding himself disappointed in his friends, until Elliot made a comment about making sure his friends were meeting the qualities he consider important and not just him meeting their whims or needs…that friendships were a two way relationship, just like romance and sex. Of course Kurt hadn’t focused on the friendship part because he was rather mind blown by the romance and sex reminder at the time (and realizing he wasn’t getting that either, and that Elliot assumed he was).

It wasn’t until after Blaine and he broke-up after the engagement and Rachel was off in LA and Mercedes was off touring with Santana and Brittany and NO ONE would answer his calls at all that Kurt got drunk and wrote out his list.

He was so drunk he didn’t remember writing it.  Instead he went to the stupid therapist that he found in papers Rachel had left when she departed who told him everything was all his fault…he was supposed to give everything he had to a relationship if he wasn’t the alpha male in it.  If he wasn’t the alpha male he needed to be the wife and the wife’s job was to cater to her husband…or his husband if he was the effeminate one, which he always had to be with a voice like his. Of course she also told him that he should never ever top and even if he’d rather top he needed to train himself to be the ultimate submissive bottom so men would like him, because that would be the only reason men would like him.  Then he went speed dating, trying out his new ‘I’ll be whatever you want’ tone…which he never really got to show because speed dating was stupid and there wasn’t time for anything. And the idiot said he wasn’t over his ex and he wasn’t really over Blaine…it hadn’t been but a few months. He still wasn’t sleeping and eating properly. And then NO ONE showed up when they were supposed to and he was alone and knew it. Alone was scary and hurt and thoughts just echoed in his head.  So when Rachel showed her face again and demanded his attention again and her face was in Lima and Blaine was there too…Kurt decided to run home.

He was pulling out his suitcases to pack when he found the list.

A good friend has time for you…as much time for you as you have for them.

A good friend picks up the phone when you call and talks about what you want to talk about…not just themselves.  Sometimes a good friend just listens just like sometimes you just listen, but a good friend won’t make you always just listen.

A good friend calls before canceling plans.

A good friend respects your time and effort and person and things.

A good friend does what you want to do, watches what you want to watch, listens to what you want to listen to, about half the time when you are together.

A good friend makes you laugh and lets you laugh, but a good friend also lets you cry and provides comfort and support.

Oh and they let you cry when YOU need to, not when it is convenient for them or on their timetable.

A good friend asks and does not constantly demand.

There were more listed, but Kurt was shaking so hard he had to set down the paper and seat himself before he fell.  When Rachel had called, breaking her silent treatment of the world…or returning from her retreat from the world, whichever way you’d like to put it, and Kurt definitely put it in the silent treatment category…she told him he had to come home to Lima, she needed him.

Sure, she briefly told him she’d love to hear about his side to his break-up with Blaine, but she also insisted he do so in person while he helped her run glee club.  Then laid out how he would help her and everything she hoped to do with it and she needed him to work the music and such, because she didn’t take those courses in NYADA, but he had to make sure she had songs to sing to showcase what could be done.

She also lectured him about letting Blaine go and how he had been petty and Kurt knew she’d been talking to Blaine and it had fed into the echo chamber in his head of “Blaine is always right, you were wrong and always were wrong, and you needed to have done whatever it was Blaine wanted’ and just bounced around in there.  On the other hand he was NOT ALLOWED to say anything about Rachel’s show bombing or talk about anything she could have done different, which of course just made him itch to say ‘I told you so’.

And really, as much as Rachel ‘needed her best friend…her best gay’ to ‘get her through the tragedy that is her life in ruins’ and ‘help mourn the destruction of her blazing star’ and ‘gather the ashes of her entire future so he can rebuild her’, her offer to help him was to ‘listen to see if he could actually explain how he could let Blaine go and break the poor dear’s heart’.

Kurt curled up on his bed. Had he ever had a friend like he listed? Rachel didn’t fit the description, nor did Santana or Brittany.  He wasn’t even sure Mercedes and Tina did way back when.  Blaine never did, either.

Adam could have met his requirements for a friend…had they had the chance to get to know each other better and develop a relationship.  Kurt was certain he would have, given a chance.  Adam had let him laugh and cry…made him laugh, even…and encouraged him to have fun and be silly, without worrying what other people might think. And once when they were going to meet for coffee between classes… just grab it and go, not even sit down and enjoy coffee…Adam called because he got held up in his class and was running slow, giving Kurt the option of skipping the meet-up if he was worried about being late. And they watched shows and movies they both liked, taking turns picking things out.   Now looking back, Kurt wanted to cry over it.  He’d kept secrets…big ones like his dad’s cancer and exactly what happened to cause the first break-up…which affected his behavior and never gave them the chance to get to the point of sharing that deeply with each other. Heck, he gave Adam less than two months to share deeply before letting Blaine and Rachel and his dad and others convince him that Blaine was the one for him, since they knew each other so deeply.

Elliot fit his friend description.  Kurt was the bad friend in that relationship at the end.  He kept breaking plans because Kurt having plans with Elliot made Blaine upset.  Kurt always called when he did so, though. He’d been glad when Elliot got to opportunity to go to the yoga retreat to learn how to be an instructor…and not just for the break it would give Elliot in terms of supplemental income.  It made it so talking to Elliot was easier to hide and made it so Kurt didn’t have to actually break up the band, like Blaine had been pushing for him to do.  Dani had been a good friend, as well.   Even Chase had fit more of Kurt’s list of friendship needs than everyone Kurt had been calling friends and thus listening to.

Kurt called his dad and said he was staying in New York and called the rental place and canceled the rental car.  He called Rachel to tell her he wasn’t going to make it, at least not right away.  She didn’t answer, so he left a message.

Then he called Elliot, who wasn’t answering his phone but always responded to his voice messages when he had a chance.

Kurt was sure his voice message sounded pathetic.

“Elliot, when do you get home? I miss you.”

He must have sounded even more pathetic than he’d thought, because Dani knocked on his door two hours later with Ice Cream and cheesecake.

“So….” Dani started their conversation.  “What is new?”

And that was that. Kurt bawled and spilled all the details of his miserable life since Dani had been on tour with her roller derby team and Elliot had gone off to the retreat and Dani had found him a new therapist within ten minutes of him speaking of his current one.

He wasn’t nearly as prone to tears when Elliot called a few hours later, during his ‘contact with the world’ time, and was able to just smile during Elliot’s lecture about Kurt not calling them earlier.  Elliot was going to be home in a week and Dani was around for the rest of the fall and throughout the winter, only touring again if her team did well enough during their local season.    Elliot and Dani convinced Kurt to stay in New York with them and start up the band again.

“What were you going to do about school?” Dani asked after Elliot had ended his call.

“Well, it is mid-September. I’ve already put six weeks into a play at the retirement home and I need to find another six week or so project. Rachel suggested I use the glee club. Other than work-study, I have two online classes…both writing…and need to do so many hours of dance and vocal training a week, from other sources than the school.  I’ve been doing an adult tap and jazz at the local gym and I’m taking vocal training from a man who worked at Julliard when he was younger.  I want to get a bit of classical type training. However, I could have done the online courses wherever I was, as well as paid for dance and vocal training.”

“So…what does your work-study have to be in?” Dani asked.

Kurt shrugged. “Something in the field of entertainment.  The course description was incredibly vague. Adam once said one of the Apples did part of his by working as an Usher for one of the Broadway theaters.”

Dani smiled.  “I have some ideas.”

Kurt woke with a start later, looking around and finding Dani snoring on the floor next to him. Papers of all sorts surrounded them and the empty carton of Ice Cream was tipped to the side, making a mess. Luckily it was near his foot and not near any of the papers.  Kurt tidied up the piles…moving bits of lyrics and music into one and costume ideas into another and other bits of notes into a third.  He picked up the ice cream carton and tossed it into the trash bin and then wet a cloth to wipe off the floor enough so he could relax.  He tore into the box he’d packed blankets and such into, grabbing a pillow and blanket to cover Dani with.  He grabbed his own from where he’d packed them away and moved back to where they fell asleep.  He lifted Dani’s head enough to place a pillow under it and covered her up before snuggling up beside her on the floor.

Maybe this time he could get the whole friend thing right and he hadn’t missed all his chances at it after all.

[spaceorphan18]

I've been (slowly) gathering and writing about songs I'd like to hear the glee kids sing (trying to keep in mind voice, theme, story arc), and after making two posts already (songs for Kurt,and songs for Blaine), I found myself wondering what your thoughts would be on this - if there are any specific songs you think would fit well in their story arc/voice/theme for Kurt and Blaine? I'm writing about the songs I'd give to Rachel now, and it's been nice to see your latest posts about their voices

First of all, thank you! I’m glad you’ve enjoyed the post about voices! 

Secondly, I always feel bad when people ask me this question because I never have a great answer -- I’m terrible at keeping up with pop music.  But... I’ll scroll through my iTunes and see if anything stands out to me! 

Okay! I have gone through my entire list of iTunes music (which isn’t a whole lot, let’s be real).  And these are songs that I think would be interesting for the characters to sing.  I hope you enjoy! 

Blaine

Bad Day - Daniel Powter: This would have been a really interesting Warblers song, actually. 

MmmBop - Hanson: Let’s be real, this is Blaine’s drunk karaoke go to. 

On Top of the World - Imagine Dragons: I think there are a lot of songs in the Imagine Dragons catalogue that Blaine could sing, but this is the happiest that comes to mind.  I don’t have a specific reason for when he’d sign it, but I think he’d do well with it.  

Wash Away - Joe Purdy: I love this song, and it’s another one that I think Darren’s voice would work on.  I love a lot of acoustic for Blaine whatever the song.   

Love Today - Mika: I actually kind of see this as a flirty Klaine duet.  

What am I To You - Norah Jones: Blaine angsting about Kurt in the middle of the night.  

An Old Fashioned Love Song - Three Dog Night: This is another one that might have been a fascinating Klaine duet for the hell of it.  (Btw - I think Blaine would have fun singing any Three Dog Night song.  I think ‘One’ a happier Blaine would sing almost satirically.)  

Kurt

Sort Of - Ingrid Michaelson: Let me be clear, I do not think he’d sing this about Blaine.  Actually, I’d think he’d sing it about his career in the performing arts.  Also I love this song, and think he’d sound great on it. 

Your Love Keeps Lifting Me Higher - Jackie Wilson: Another Klaine duet.

I Try - Macy Gray: This is Kurt’s drunken karaoke song

Grace Kelly - Mika: Mika is a missed opportunity.  I love idea that Kurt would be able to be provocative and alluring in some compacity with this one. 

I Shall Believe - Sheryl Crow: An angsty Kurt song

He Plays the Violin - 1776 Soundtrack: Okay, so hear me out.  This song is about Martha Jefferson alluding what her sex life is like.  It’s very suggestive.  I would have loved to hear (and see) Kurt do this one. 

Only You - Yaz: This one’s another Klaine-ish duet.  It’s their drunken karaoke song to each other

Santana

Apparently, I had some Santana feels while doing this, and found a few songs I think she’d sound really good on.  

KT Turnstall - Suddenly I See

Trouble - Pink

Angel of the Morning - Pretenders

Finn

With Finn’s penchant for doing classic rock, I’m surprised they never had him sing this. 

Brown Eyed Girl Van Morrison

Mercedes

This is just a gorgeous song that made me think of Mercedes. 

Never Gonna Break My Faith - Aretha Franklin

Sam

I had this on my list, it made me laugh and think of Sam. 

Take Me Home Country Roads

Tina

I started to laugh thinking about Tina hitting her head again, and this time they wake up in some kind of Dawson’s Creek Teen Drama fantasy

I Don’t Want to Wait - Paul Cole

Group

Because some songs you have to sing with a lot of people. 

With a Little Help From My Friends - Beatles 

Make Your Own King of Music - Mamas and the Papas

I’ll Be There For You - The Rembrants

Closing Time - Semisonic (Really, this should have been the last song.) 

All Star - Smash Mouth (Totally the male new directions drunken karaoke song.) 

The Lion Sleeps Tonight - The Tokens

YMCA - The Village People

Shut Up and Dance - Walk the Moon

This was an interesting exercise! Thanks Nonny! 

[skivvysupreme]

I need xkit to catch up with the updated replies immediately

@lilyvandersteen :D drunk!Kurt is so insanely fun to write lol. and for so long, people were only writing Blaine as the drunk one! I got a prompt for one of them to be drunk and chose Kurt because it was the more interesting route, to me. 

plus, he has ALWAYS been the wilder drunk. drunk!Kurt does shit like throw up on Emma Pillsbury and get un-proofread tattoos hahahaha 

and as far as “That Can Only Mean One Thing” - Kurt, as a comedic character, is just so fucking good. and I always enjoy writing Rachel Berry; she’s the kind of character who *belongs* in funny stories because she can be so over the top and she pushes and makes things happen!

[klaineccfanficlibrary]

Any recs for fics involving drunk confessions or just drunk misadventures in general?

Hey Nonnie, Ooooh, I love Drunk Klaine fics! Here’s a rec list for you, and if anyone wants to add their recs, please do. There can never be too many Drunk Klaine fics :-) Hugs, Marjan

A Time and a Place by whatwasright

A night involving too many margaritas leads to Blaine challenging Kurt’s PDA ban in a rather unsurprising way.

Are You Drunk? by @slayediest / notarelationship (justpractising)

Prompted on tumblr, start with the line "Are you drunk?" with Kurt/Blaine/Rachel.

Backs Up Pressed Against Bleached Walls by whatabeautifulmess

Written for a GKM Prompt. Kurt and Blaine meet at a bar, dancing and sexy times ensue.

Bed Mates by @missmichellebelle

Kurt did not come to college to babysit someone when they’re drunk, even if Blaine is ridiculously endearing when he is.

Blame It On The Alcohol by MELANCH0LYS

What could’ve happened between Blaine and Rachel’s drunk duet and Burt walking in on a very hungover Blaine in Kurt’s bed in 2x14

Blame It On The Strawberries by lilinas

Kurt and Blaine are at a party. Blaine gets drunk. And we all know Blaine is a horny drunk!

I can never resist drunk, horny Blaine.

Boystown by @skivvysupreme

Kurt and Blaine have a night out in one of Chicago’s most famous neighborhoods. Stop #7 of the Klaine Road Trip 2015!

Come Here Often? by wckdklaine

At ten o’clock on a Sunday morning, Kurt Hummel has no idea what he is doing in a strange (but very cute) man’s bed alone in a Dalton Academy t-shirt and just his boxers. All he remembers is a NYADA party, a curly haired boy, and a nasty smelling blue liquid on his $200 sweater.

Drunk History, vol. 206 by @skivvysupreme

In which Kurt gets drunk AF and tells the story of how he and Blaine got together.

Drunk on You by flaming_muse

It takes Kurt three times to fit his key in the lock of the apartment’s door, partly because Blaine is swaying heavily against his side, a warm, drunk weight keeping him off-balance, and partly because the alcohol in his own system is making the lock swim just enough in the plane of the door that he can’t quite catch it.

Drunken Texts by alexwhitney

Drunk!Blaine accidentally texts Loner!Kurt on a Friday night. Shenanigans ensue.

I Know What I Need by @caramelcoffeeaddict /CoffeeAddict80

Kurt and Blaine are college roommates. Both boys have girlfriends and think they're straight. One night, after both of them suddenly find themselves single, they get drunk and turn to each other to abate their sexual appetites.

I’m So Excited by @softiekatya

Blaine receives a few of weird texts in the middle of the night and that’s how it starts.

I Wanna Sex You by @spaceorphan18

Written for 15-minute nonny prompt:

Klaine- “How was I supposed to know sexy striptease was going to be hazardous”

Keep You Under My Skin by judearaya

Improbable first time shenanigans in a closet.

Kink by @lalalenii

None of them had intended this to happen. They hadn’t planned it and they definitely didn’t see it coming. But still, when Elliott wakes up on Saturday morning, head a little fuzzy, wrapped in Kurt and Blaine’s high thread-count sheets, his best friends’ naked bodies pressed against him, he doesn’t feel an ounce of regret. Judging by their bashful smiles, neither do they.

Kurt’s Drunken Confessions by @scrapmom2112

What happens when Rachel decides to have another party and this time it’s Kurt that gets drunk? The alcohol certainly loosens his tongue but will that be a good thing or a bad thing? Set in Season 2 before Original Song. Kurt leaves Dalton before Blaine has a chance to admit his feelings and when Rachel throws Kurt a welcome back party, things get a little complicated.

Living In The Same World by @a-simple-rainbow

Drunk, Kurt Hummel makes a humiliating mistake: A quick flick of his eyes, over the man’s shoulder and towards the door reveals another man standing there. This second man is taller and bigger. Muscles stretching out a tacky imitation of a police uniform as he holds a boom box under his arm, standing right behind the (Oh god) actual police officer. (AU, policeman!Blaine)

Margaritaaa by @hazelandglasz

Alcohol can make you do stupid things–like fall in love.

Oh Blue Eyes by @dont-stop-believin-in-klaine / blackrose1002

Has anyone ever told you that you have beautiful eyes, Kurt? 

Once Every Blue Moon by @hazelandglasz

Based on this glorious idea : http://tacogrande.tumblr.com/post/158465408932/drunk-kurt-is-a-rarity-but-also-a-gift

One Thing Led To Another (Now He’s Kissing My Mouth) by  thelilacfield

Kurt has a terrible tendency to hook-up with his friends or complete strangers while drunk. Thankfully, he has a fantastic tendency to buy coffee on his way home.

Operation Secret Santa by @ckerouac

Kurt can't stop staring at the cute guy who comes by the coffee station near his desk every morning, but can never muster up the courage to say hello.  Until the assignment for their office Secret Santa is revealed and his reads 'Blaine Anderson'.  Written in pieces for Klaine Advent 2017.

Out of Breath by @missbeizy

gigisplanet requested: “Kurt and Blaine having quiet sex in an unexpected location while Rachel is pottering around the apartment?”

Tipsy bathroom sex.

Reprieve by @trufflemores

Sometimes they just want to loosen up and have fun.

Right into the Christmas Zone by @ckerouac

“Imma take you right into the Christmas zooooone,” the guy on stage slurred, dancing to the music.  Well… dancing-adjacent, Kurt decided.  It was mostly hopping around and rubbing his hands through his hair.  He was cute.  Hogging all of the karaoke time and obviously drunk, but kind of cute.

Seeing-Eye Kurt by @lady-divine-writes

After the fiasco of Rachel’s basement party, Kurt gets the honor of taking a drunk Blaine home. But drunk people usually say exactly what they feel, and Blaine has something sweet to say to Kurt.

Setting Sail, or, The One Where Kurt and Blaine Get Drunk, Get Married, and Commandeer a Boat by @spinmybowtie

Inspired by this: (847) I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat…

Show and Tell by @skivvysupreme

It’s Valentine’s Day, and Kurt is so in love with his husband that he can’t even deal with it. Being drunk ought to help, right?

Show them our love by rynirer

Written for this prompt on the gkm: Sometime in the future, Kurt and Blaine are having a night out in New York, and go to a club. They're both tipsy/drunk, and Kurt really wants to dance and show Blaine off to the other guys at the club. Cue Kurt and his sinful hips grinding against Blaine until they're both needy and desperate and one of them drags the other off to the bathroom/backroom for some dirty fun.

Spin Me Around by @skintightsocksfic

Kurt was maybe a little drunk.  "I'm not drunk," he tells Blaine, because Kurt had really been looking forward to Blaine's other plans involving his bedroom and no interruptions before he got sidetracked by the punch.

Stranded/Recovered by @skivvysupreme

Blaine gets kicked out of his own room when his two best friends decide to resolve their sexual tension, but, as it turns out, being sexiled is not the end of the world. 

Thank the Alcohol by @sir-pyllero

They’ve never said a word to each other until Rachel decides she needs a date to Kurt’s party and his neighbor will do.

The Curious Case of the Drunk Dial Gone Right: A Memoir by Kurt Hummel by @dahlstrom

Inspired by “accidentally called your number while drunk asking for a ride and you actually came au” from this list.

The Friday Night Show by @lady-divine-writes

Kurt and Blaine stumble drunk into the loft when they think they're alone ... but as it turns out, they're not as alone as they think.

The World Could Be Burning by kittenslisten

Blaine's having a hard time coping with Kurt's absence, and finds himself making a drunk phone call.

Ugly Sweaters and Jingle Bells by @ckerouac

Kurt and Blaine find the perfect sweaters to celebrate the season and fail to remember the golden holiday rule -- never drink Rachel's pink drinks.

Uninhibited by @missbeizy

For gingeritt, who requested "smut with Blaine being all possessive and when it’s over he’s all apologetic and beating himself about being too rough with him but Kurt’s like, 'Um, sweetie, I liked it.  A lot.'"

Whatever Comes Our Way by JessicaMDawn

Takes place during 'Blame It On The Alcohol.' Kurt leaves Rachel's party and takes Blaine home with him. Dealing with a drunk Blaine is interesting and a losing battle. Then Blaine says something that makes Kurt's heart ache, but not necessarily in a bad way. pre-Klaine.

your text from last night by @klaineanummel

Kurt doesn’t make sound decisions when he’s drunk.

Or that time Kurt sent a dick pic to Rachel’s dad.