#this man is ready to be friends again when i was an asshole (a depressed asshole going through the worst two years of their life-

[vanillanaps]

Still Get Jealous | Steve Rogers

Request - Hello, I think you are a master writer and I have a drabble of blurb request only if you’re up for it though. Could you write a jealously trope for steve using the song red high heels? :> If it doesn’t inspire anything, that is okay. Thank you!

A/n - I must’ve forgotten how to write drabbles/blurb cause babyyy I got carried again lmaoo. But, unfortunately anon I didn’t find inspiration with the song you requested I still wanted give you jealousy and red high heels, hope it still fulfills you!!

Category - Steve Rogers x Reader, Angst

Warnings - Steve is a jealous asshole with a reckless mouth, reader drinks to ignore the pain

Word Count - 1.3k

♡♡♡♡

It had been approximately two weeks since Steven Grant Rogers left you alone in your apartment after he had broken up with you. In just a little over a month, it would’ve been your year anniversary with Steve. You were both happy and getting ready to take things to the next level, so it was beyond shocking when he sat you down to explain that he ‘just couldn’t do it anymore’ but you were smart enough to spot the bullshit.

Regardless, you cried. You were falling in love, hard and fast just for him to up and leave you out of the blue. But, as the second week of sulking had taken its time slowly ending, something in you snapped. You realized that you shouldn’t be home, crying and depressed about a man who clearly couldn’t give a rats ass about you.

Wiping your tears, you sat up as you searched for your phone in your tangled sheets and blanket. Once you found it, you quickly dialed the number of your favorite girl who could easily take you out of your slump, “Wanda?”

“Hey, Y/n. I’m so glad you called, you haven’t been responding to my text, I was worried.” She had answered the phone with concern in her voice.

“I know, I know, I’m sorry. I just,” You paused, sighing as you threw your covers off of yourself, jumping out of bed, “I’m just sick of crying over Steve you know? I want to go out, I want to have fun, I want to get back to who I was before him—and I wanna do it tonight.”

“Tonight? Y/n, are you sure you’re ready?” Wanda questioned. She was fully supportive of getting you out of the house, but she just wanted you to be sure.

“Yes, tonight. Be ready in an hour.” You told her, hanging up before she could respond, knowing she would try to mother you. Get your real feelings out as to why you were so suddenly ready to go out. But that’s not what you wanted. Even if it was for one night, you just wanted Steve off your mind.

♡♡♡♡

The music blasted loudly in the speakers surrounding the club, the atmosphere through the roof. As you took it all in, you could slowly feel the man slipping from your mind, “Let’s get a drink!” You shouted to Wanda. The two of you held hands as you shuffled to the bar, careful not to lose each other in the club, “Tequila shots please!”

“How many?”

“Just keep them coming!” You shouted to the bartender. He nodded, pouring up the shots and passing them over onto the counter.

“Are you sure, Y/n?!” Wanda asked, picking up her shot as you grabbed yours.

You nodded, “I just need one night not thinking about that—idiot!”

She nodded before holding up her glass to cheer with you, “To forgetting about that idiot!” You both laughed before clicking your glasses and taking the shots.

As promised, the bartender kept the shots coming after each time you both finished one. You felt there was no better way than drowning your sorrows than letting the liquor run through your body, mellowing you out and then letting you forget about the world surrounding you.

But no alcohol in the world could help him forget. Not as he stood in the back corner of the club, watching as you and Wanda take shots back to back. At first, it didn’t bother him. You were out with your friend, having a good time. His ears didn’t turn red from anger until he saw what you were wearing. You had his favorite number on.

A black, skimpy, body con dress that squeezes you in all the right ways, showing off your attributes that he loved. Barely covering your ass so if you were to bend over, the entire club could see all of you. You had your hair in his favorite style and not to mention that red gloss that was painted across those lips that felt like heaven to him. But that wasn’t the worst of it.

Steve made his way closer to you, not close enough to be seen but close enough for his eyes to trail those legs that used to be wrapped around him 24/7. Catching those red, sexy, strappy, five inch stilettos that he bought you. The ones he use to fuck you endlessly in. How could he be such a fucking idiot.

“Wanda, I wanna danceeee!” You slurred, all of those shots starting to take control of your mind and body. You felt good, you felt great.

“Come on!” Taking her last shot, she grabbed your hands quickly pulling you to the dance floor.

You weren’t sure when it happened or how it happened, but at one moment, you were dancing with your best friend, having the time of your life. The next, your ass was pushed up against some man’s crotch as you grinded on him. His hands trailing to any part of your body he could reach. You didn’t mind though, you deserved this. You especially didn’t mind when he nuzzled his face into your neck, pressing soft kisses into your shoulder and neck. For the moment, you were enjoying it and then—you weren’t.

“The fucks your problem dude?!” The random man yelled when you were snatched from his hold.

Your body ran cold when you pulled yourself together, just long enough to see who ruined your dance, “Steve?! What are you doing?!” He ignored you as he grabbed your hand and dragged you through the club and to the exit, “Stop it! Let me go!” He didn’t stop until he got you outside of the club, “What’s your issue?!”

“Two weeks huh? That’s all it took for you to be in the club? Dressed like a hooker and dancing like a slut?” Steve shouted. Immediately he regretted it when he saw the look on your face, but there was nothing he could do to take it back now.

You scoffed, shaking your head, “You’re a real piece of shit, you know that Steve? You broke up with ME for no reason! I cried for two weeks straight because of you! But now, since I’m in the club, with a hooker outfit that YOU bought me, by the way, I’m a slut?!”

Steve's blood was running hot and he was running of anger and jealousy, “You’re drunk, Y/n.”

“I’m not drunk!” You shouted, right before stumbling over your feet, “I’m not that drunk! I’m sober enough to realize that I was doing and to tell you to leave me the fuck alone! I’m not going to spend the rest of my life crying over you when you don't want me! And that stunt you just pulled? Let alone calling me a hooker and a slut all in the same breath? I’m glad we broke up!” You felt it, you felt the tears starting to bubble underneath your eyes, but you didn’t let them fall, “Just leave me alone! I just want to be the person I was before you ruined me, you asshole!”

“Y/n, I’m sorry.” He called out as you started to back away from him, “I broke up with you because I was scared! Everything between us was moving fast and—and I didn’t know what to do so I left!”

“I don’t care, Steve! I don’t care! It’s too late!” You shook your head, not wanting to hear any more excuses. Not wanting him to ruin your night anymore than he already had, “Go find someone else to be scared to fall in love with.”

Just then, Wanda came running out of the club, relieved to see you standing there, “Oh my god, I’ve been looking for you! I was worried.” She breathed, but halted in her tracks when she saw Steve a couple feet away, “Steve? What are you doing here?”

“Leaving, he’s leaving.” You responded for him, turning your back to him and facing Wanda, “Let’s go back inside, I need another drink.”

She nodded, wrapping her arm with yours as the two of you headed back inside without so much as a glance back at the man who realized he truly lost everything.

[notfreetoday]

MPW Ep 6 Subtitle Corrections

Masterlist: EP 1 || EP 2 || EP 3 || EP 4 || EP 5 ||

Y: 正直言って　怖い 近づく度に　心臓が跳ねるから 何なら近寄らないで欲しい 住む世界が違うから 好かれたいとかは思わない ただ。。。 嫌われてしまったら死んでしまうかもしれない 想像するだけで　胃液がせり上がった Y: To be honest, I was scared. Because whenever he came close to me, my heart leapt and skipped a beat. I wished that, if possible, he wouldn't come near me because we lived in different worlds. 'I want him to like me' - I never had a thought like that. It was just... If he ended up hating me then I felt like I might die. Just thinking about it made my stomach turn.

We've seen for awhile that Yoh's fear that Segasaki will one day come to disdain him is what keeps him from voicing his thoughts out loud - but it is in Ep 6 that we truly learn the intensity with which Yoh feels, and come to understand why that fear overwhelms him to the point that he is incapable of hearing Segasaki's love for him.

Or, Yoh sees Segasaki for the first time and literally starts spouting poetry in the way only a visual artist can. Get ready for a lot of interaction breakdowns - this episode tells us quite a lot about these two! Same translation disclaimer applies, Ep 6, let's go!

S: 相変わらず　歩くの遅ぇな S: As usual, he walks so slowly

Y: あのさ　実は Y: 出てくるときにケンカしちゃって M: え？どうしたの Y: お前の仕事なんてどうでもいいって言われた M: 瀬ケ崎さんが？そんなこと言ったの？ Y: どうでもいいって　なんだよ Y: 人が一所懸命やってることに対して* Y: 最低だよ　あいつ* Y: You know... actually Y: When I was leaving we got into an argument M: Huh? What happened? Y: I was told "I don't care at all about something like your work" M: By Segasaki-san? He said something like that? Y: "I don't care at all"... what's with that! Y: To say that about something that someone is giving their all for...* Y: He's the worst, that guy** **Yoh uses あいつ (aitsu) to refer to Segasaki as "that guy". This is again considered rude, though is often used amongst male friends as well (like calling someone an asshole/bastard). He tends to use this word to refer to Segasaki in his head, especially when he's annoyed with him.

*Just like at the end of Ep 5, where Yoh emphasizes that he will become someone who can earn more as opposed to just earning more, here Yoh specifies that he is upset with Segasaki's response to his work, rather than being upset with the response being directed at himself, as the original subs imply. It's a small difference but I think it's important because it fits with his entire character. He has consistently only been triggered by comments about his work, not about him as a person. Yoh is self-conscious and sensitive about his work, because he sees competence as a measure of worth. It's precisely because he ties his self-worth to his work that he falls into such a deep depression in Ep 5, and it is the same reason why Yoh does not understand what good Segasaki could possibly see in him - after all, there is no merit in just being who he is, only in the work that he can do.

Y: いや　それは都合よく受け取り過ぎだよ Atsuya: ダヨ君　言葉って受け取り方が９割だからさ A: 同じ言葉でも　その時の気持ちやコンディションによって A: 違った意味に捻じ曲げちゃうものなんだよ A: ダヨ君が元気な時だったら     もっと甘～く聞こえたんじゃない？ Y: No, that's just over-interpreting it in my favor Atsuya (Man-san's husband): Dayo-kun, they say that about 90% of the meaning words convey comes down to the way we interpret them, so A: Depending on the way we feel, or our condition in that moment, that meaning can end up distorted and warped, even if the same words are used, you know? A: If Dayo-kun you, had been in a happier mood, might it not have sounded a lot sweeter to you?

Y: ん。。。いや、違うんです Y: 俺とあの人って　そういう感じじゃないんで Y: Mm... No, it's not like that Y: That person and I, well... that's not what it's like (between us), you see

Y: あの人を初めて見たとき この星の生き物じゃないかもしれないって思った   少なくとも地球上で見たものの造形の中で 一番きれいだとおもった 耳の形　鼻筋　 下顎角のライン　唇の膨らみ きっと見えない眼球の形状まで きれいなんだろうなって

Y: When I first saw that person I thought that he might not be a living thing from this planet At the very least, out of all the forms that I had ever seen on this Earth I thought he had the most beautiful one. The shape of his ears, the ridge of his nose, The line of the angle of his jaw, the full contour of his lips Even the structure of what could not be seen - the globe of his eyes - I thought for sure that too must be beautiful.

Y: 趣��で漫画は描いてたけど 現実の人間を描くのは初めてだった それに　 男を描きたいと思ったのも初めてだった 今　目に焼き付けて　描きつけておきたい衝動に駆られた たぶん　あの美貌と同じ空間にいた そのせいで　俺は　おかしくなっていた Y: I had drawn manga as a hobby but It was my first time drawing a real live person. And, It was also the first time that I thought "I want to draw a man" In that moment, driven by impulse, I wanted to burn his image into my eyes, to capture his likeness down on paper. Probably, it was because I was in the same space as that beauty. It was because of that, that I began to go crazy.

At 06:44, when Segasaki's green shirt classmate comes in calling his name, you can see that Yoh mouth’s "Mizuki" after he hears it.

(Btw Green Shirt later wears a Red Jacket, and is played by Nishimoto Maiki, the leader of the group Acchan is in - GENIC. Cute shot of the 3 of them here)

S: 直接何かしてくるわけではないし　別にいいと思うけど S: Well it's not like he's doing anything to us directly... I think it's fine actually

Y: 女の子が相手なら　 一目惚れだとはっきり思ったかもしれない でも　ただただきれいな男だったんで 自分の脳が　そこまで処理しきれなかった Y: If it was a girl Then maybe I would have clearly understood that this was love at first sight But it was just very simply, a beautiful man so My brain couldn't handle processing more than that

Most of this is not subtitled, and it’s a little muffled, but as the group walks over you can hear that Segasaki is the center of their conversation here, though he's not actually participating in it much. It speaks to the group dynamics, so I'm including it here (Segasaki is bolded):

Girl: ええ？ S: ちがうよ Red Jacket: 瑞貴じゃん、ね、今ね？ Girl どうせモテるじゃん S: いやモテない Red:モテるよ瑞貴が Girl: 告白されてるよ　どうせ Red: されてる　されてる Girl: あれ！ぼっちくん*じゃん Red: うわっ　マジだ　ぼっちくんじゃん Boy: いつも俺たちのことチラチラ見てる Girl: ちょっと来なよ　おしゃべりしたげるからさ** Girl: Whaat? S: It wasn't Red Jacket: It was (said to) Mizuki wasn't it, right? Just now? Girl: I mean you're popular anyway! S: No, I'm not Red: Mizuki's popular Girl: Whatever it is, that was a confession (you received) Red: It was, it was Girl: Oh hey! Why, isn't it Little Loner*? Red: Oh snap, you're right! It is Little Loner! Boy: The one who always sneaks looks at us Girl: Come here a bit, we'll talk to you, ok?** *ぼっちくん (Bocchi-kun) - Bocchi is slang for loner, and by adding the suffix "-kun" to it, they've turned this into a diminutive, like a nickname. It sounds cute and friendly, but is clearly meant as a casual sort of insult, so I've translated it as "Little" here. **This is an interesting line to discuss. She tells Yoh to come over, using the phrase 来なよ (kina yo) - this is the same "na" that Segasaki uses in Ep 4 actually, when he tells a drunk Yoh to go sleep in the room. It's the exact same word form, but where it was tender when Segasaki said it, it's highly insulting here - and the reason is because of the context and their (non-existant) relationship. She may be Yoh's senior, but this is the first time they're meeting, and they are nowhere near close enough that this phrasing would ever be seen as appropriate. She then tells him "we'll talk to you", using the colloquial form of "~したあげる (shita ageru)" aka "to do for you" - in other words, she's framing the action of them talking to him as if it were a gift from them to him (this word form also implies they are above him in the hierarchy). She also adds the polite prefix "O" to the word for "talk", which in this context is meant to make her appear sweet and ladylike. In other words, with just one line, she has insulted Yoh not only by talking down to him as if he were a small child or a pet, but also by insinuating that she's a sweet, lovely person who has been so kind as to deign to speak to him.

Y: あの。。。俺*　買ってきます Y: 絡まれてるより１００億倍マシだわ Y: Um... I*... will go and buy it. Y: That's definitely 100 million times better than getting harassed by them *Yoh still uses the masculine pronoun 俺 (ore) for "I" here (the same one he's used in every episode) which is remarkable for the fact that he doesn't switch to the more polite form 僕 (boku). Nowadays, it isn't really expected per se that a junior make this switch - especially since "ore" is usually the go-to pronoun for most male university students - but the switch wouldn't be surprising either, given that they are his seniors. Yoh does acknowledge their seniority when he uses the formal -masu form of the word "to buy" - but in the context of them bullying him, the choice to stick with the more masculine pronoun "ore" suggests that he isn't intimidated by them.

Red: セルフパシリって　すごくね？ Girl: やばいよ Red: He automatically offered to be an errand boy! Isn’t that crazy? Girl: It’s nuts!

パシリ(pashiri) - to be made to run errands - is slang, and it is used specifically to refer to cases where someone with more social power orders another around. It’s almost always linked to bullying or misuse of social power – so by using this word, these guys - they know exactly what they are doing.

Y: クソだよ　あいつら* Y: Those bastards*… they’re trash *Yoh uses the same word あいつ (aitsu) to refer to the gang that he did at the beginning of this episode to refer to Segasaki - once again it is the context that changes the meaning of this word. With Segasaki, it is proof that they share a close relationship. With these upper classmen that he's just met - it's definitely rude.

This is a very common form of bullying in school, and evidently, Yoh recognizes it immediately. The fact that he jumps so quickly to cooperating with it tells us sadly that this is something he's familiar with - he's likely been bullied before. This is unfortunately, unsurprising, because Yoh doesn't adhere to social norms very much. He eats alone, he stares at people, he doesn't greet his seniors properly (that slight bow is not enough, there should at least be a verbal greeting of some sort).

In my post on amae, I talked about how the interdependent self-construal means that one's ability to assimilate is seen as a value. In the same vein, people who do not fit in with the group, or who do not conform, are not looked upon favorably in Japan, because it is often assumed that they simply do not want to. It is not that they are unable to assimilate, it is that they are refusing to make an effort to be part of the group, and thus the fault and blame lies with them. Ostracization of those different therefore, is the expected consequence and punishment that the group metes out. All of us have to do our part to adhere to the rules of the group - what makes you so special that you can do your own thing? If you just did your job of fitting in like the rest of us have, well, then you wouldn't be in this position in the first place, now would you? - This sort of justification is the reason why bullying in Japan can become very, very extreme, and why despite efforts, has been so difficult to eradicate.

S: そんなに　一人で持てないだろうと思って S: 貸して Y: ありがとうございます* S: 行こう S: I thought all of that was probably going to be too much for one person to carry S: Pass it over Y: Thank you very much* S: Let's go

*Yoh uses the full, polite version of "thank you" here, and he will, for the most part, continue to use desu/masu forms with Segasaki, and answer him politely, in recognition of their senior/junior relationship. Similarly, Segasaki uses informal forms with Yoh, though he maintains a friendly demeanor and does not drop to rude forms at all, because they aren't that close yet. Note how he says 行こう (ikou) for "let's go" here - different from his present day "we're going", which leaves no room for argument.

(Also, he took the heavier bag of drinks (´ ▽｀).。ｏ♡)

S: 結構歩くのゆっくりなんだね Y: よく　言われます S: 君　名前は？ Y: あ　葉って言います　あの。。。葉っぱの S: ふーん　葉くんか Y: はい S: 俺は　 Y: 瑞貴...さん S: なんで知ってんの？ Y: あ　そう呼ばれていたので S: よく　聞いてんな Y: はあ　まあ。。。

Let's break this down to look at some social cues and nuances:

S: You walk quite leisurely, don't you? Y: I've... been told that a lot

This is more than just a callback to the beginning of the episode (or a chance to contrast how much more polite and sweet Segasaki sounds here 😂) - This is another way in which we see Yoh does not fit in. Segasaki is his senior, who has gone out of his way to come help him (never mind that Yoh's being bullied), and he should at the very least, be trying to match Segasaki's pace, not making him wait like Yoh does here. Segasaki's comment should be taken as much as an expression of surprise, as it should a cue to catch up - Yoh glances briefly at Segasaki after this line (which seems to amuse the latter) but he doesn't actually apologize outright or walk any faster. He does admit that he's been told this often - which sometimes can work as a concession, because you sort of validate what the other person is saying, but at the same time you aren't quite agreeing either. That said, it can backfire, because it means you've been made aware of your habit and yet have done nothing to change it. Segasaki doesn't seem to mind though, and actually matches Yoh's pace here.

Speaking of "pace" - "マイペース" or "my pace" is a loan word from English, and is a term used to describe someone who tends to do things, well, at their own pace, or in their own way, and who isn't bother by the people or goings-on around them. Usually meant as a benign, sometimes affectionate comment on someone's personality, it often brings to mind the image of someone who appears to drift during conversations, who might be a little "slow" in social interactions, or who physically lags behind the group. It can have negative connotations, because it means the group needs to make concessions for this person (like looking for them when they've wondered off). Yoh is the epitome of someone who is "my pace", and I'm very sure that the emphasis on his slow walking is not just a peculiar quirk of his character, it's an intentional part of the character design to show how Yoh is different.

S: *You... what's your name? Y: Ah, I'm called Yoh. Um... written with the character for "leaf" S: Hmm~ Yoh-kun huh.. Y: Yes

*Segasaki uses the polite pronoun 君 (kimi) to refer to Yoh here, as opposed to the rougher お前 (omae) that he now uses in the present day.

That little action Yoh does whilst saying "leaf" is him drawing out the kanji character for his name. It's quite common to tell someone which character is used to write your name, because the characters usually mean something, and it helps others to remember. Strictly speaking, Yoh really should be introducing his full name here, but judging by how he's been fiddling with the plastic bag, he's probably just too nervous to realize.

S: I'm Y: Mizuki...san S: Why do you know that? Y: Ah... that's what.. you were called (by them) so... S: You listen closely don't you Y: Ahh.. yea...

Nice save 😂First of all, it's extremely unusual to jump straight to using someone's first name instead of their family name (unless you're still a kid), let alone doing it to an upper classman, though Yoh does manage to tack on the polite suffix "-san" at the back. It's the verbal equivalent of stepping right into someone's personal space and touching their bag or something and then being all "er there was something there...". It's just weird and borderline inappropriate 😂 The fact that Segasaki doesn't scold him for taking such a liberty, or show any sign that he appears weirded out by it (in fact, he actually goes along with it!) tells us that Segasaki is a very kind (yasashii would be the right term here, the same term that appears at the end of this episode) or at least a very tolerant individual though I'd also like to think he just finds Yoh's strange ways a little cute too.

S: いま　楽しい？ Y: え？あ　いえ S: 絡まれて　パシらされてさ Y: ああ。。 S: どう？ Y: いや　たのしくないです Y: 瑞貴さんは？ S: 俺？ Y: はい S: 全然楽しくない S: 内緒ね Y: はい

Continuing with the breakdown:

S: Is it fun? Y: Huh? Ah no-

Segasaki's tone changes here to a more serious one - all he does is stress the final syllables of the word "fun" to indicate he's asking a question, instead of adding any end particles that might give more context, or that might soften the tone. The topic switch is a little sudden, which is why Yoh seems a bit confused. It doesn't help that the words are a little ambiguous - it literally translates to "now, fun?" - except the Japanese word for "now" is often used to mean "just now" as well, because the Japanese concept of time is not quite as linear as it is in West. "Now" doesn't just refer to "this current exact second we are in", it extends from whenever the "current activity" began right up to "this current exact second" - the key is figuring out what the current activity is 😅. Because Segasaki jumps into this topic so suddenly, and without much contextual cues, Yoh can't quite tell whether he means now, as in them walking together, or now, as in, the whole being sent on an errand thing, which is why Segasaki clarifies in the next sentence:

S: Being hassled, and sent on errands? Y: Oh... S: So? Y: No, it... isn't fun.

Segasaki watches Yoh closely whilst he waits for the answer to his question. This is Segasaki checking that Yoh knows he's being bullied, and it's also permission to talk about the topic. Once he confirms that Yoh does know what's happening, he looks away again.

The exchange tells us a lot about Segasaki's character, because often, the reason why bullying goes on for so long is that no one is willing to talk about it. Everyone knows what's going on, but no one acknowledges it. The fact that Segasaki jumps straight into it hints to Yoh that he doesn't agree with what his "friends" are doing (whether Yoh catches that hint or not is a different story). It also tells us, the audience, that he isn't afraid to speak up about things he disagrees with (similar to how he spoke up for Yoh when Yoh was sketching in the cafeteria) - but not to the extent that he'll do something which threatens the harmony of the group outright. This is tatemae/honne, which I talked about briefly in the amae post as well, and linked to this street interview video for real life examples. In short, tatemae is your ability to avoid conflict and smooth over group interactions, and is seen as an essential and positive trait. Segasaki is very good at this, even at this stage in his life, which is part of why he is so well-liked.

Y: What about Mizuki-san? S: Me? Y: Yes S: I'm not having fun at all S: It's a secret, yea? Y: Yes

This is cute, and tells us about Yoh's character too. Firstly, he's still persisting in his use of "Mizuki-san", though he's being really tentative about it, like he's testing whether or not it's okay. Secondly, he's actually asking Segasaki directly to confirm his stand on what his "friends" are doing. Is this Yoh being daring, or just his slightly awkward, somewhat tactless self? I couldn't tell you 🤣 It's likely a bit of both.

In response, you can hear the surprise in Segasaki's voice, but he doesn't hesitate to detach himself from the actions of the group. The way he invites Yoh into his group here, by acting as if he's let Yoh in on a secret, is very charming obviously, and reminds me somewhat of how in Ep 4, he suddenly drops to "Kanami-san" when talking to Man-san too. This again fits with how his "public mode" has been consistently portrayed thus far - nice, charming, polite, good-looking, and obviously popular (Ep 3, the girls in the cafe at the back, Ep 4, the way he talks to Man-san, this Ep, where he's even been proposed to).

Guy: 俺の水がきたかな？　 Red: あいつ覚えてるかな Guy: 確かに　待たせたな S: ごめん　葉くんお腹痛いんだって　だから連れて帰るわ　はい Girl: 瑞貴まで帰らなくてもいいんじゃん S: しんどいのに　一人すんのかわいそうでしょ* S: じゃあ　またね　また　 S: 行こう Red: 優しいな**　瑞貴 Girl: でも　帰っちゃったよ Guy: Is my water coming? Red: Will that guy remember? Guy: Good point, he's really made us wait S: Sorry! Yoh says he's got a stomachache, so I'm gonna take him home. Here! Girl: Huh? But it's not like Mizuki you have to go too right? S: Leaving him all by himself right when he's having a hard time - wouldn't you feel bad for him?* S: So, see you guys later, 'kay! Bye! S: Let's go Red: Mizuki's really kind** isn't he? Girl: But, he's leaving you know!

*Segasaki does a very small switch up to the polite form here, as he takes the moral high ground by reminding the girl that as Yoh's senior, they have an obligation to take care of him when he's unwell. He's still friendly about it though. **優しい (yasashii) - kind. This word pops up a lot to describe Segasaki, we'll talk about it at the end of this episode.

Y: あの　いいんですか？ S: あそこ戻りたかった？ Y: いえ Y: Um... is this okay? S: You wanted to go back there? Y: No

Y: いつも　友達に囲まれてるこの人が なんでこうして　俺と一緒に歩いてるのかわからなくて 不思議だった Y: This person, whose friends were always surrounding him... I just couldn't understand why he'd walk together with me like this It was a mystery to me.

Y: あの顔が　信じられないほど近くにあった 耳元に届いた声の響きまで　良いものであることに 気づいてしまった Y: That face was... so close to me I could scarcely believe it And it dawned on me then How wonderfully pleasing Even the notes of his voice drifting pass my ears sounded

The scene in the library I've included right at the top, but I'm going to add the conversation that happens during Yoh's monologue, since the subs have them sort of mixed in.

S: 葉 S: 何してんの？ Y: え？えと、あの、本を探せて... S: この本面白いよ Y: え？ Y: ありがとうございます S: また感想教えて Y: はい S: Yoh S: What're you doing? Y: Eh! Um, ah.. I'm looking for a book... (inaudible) S: This book is interesting Y: Eh? Y: Thank you very much S: Tell me your thoughts on it next time Y: Yes

Segasaki's already dropped the polite suffix "-kun" behind Yoh's name here, and doesn't actually bother to let Yoh finish saying thank you before he tells him to report back about the book. Yoh on the other hand, is still using the full, formal and polite version of thank you, and answers him properly. Segasaki's taken the initiative to get closer to Yoh - he's already speaking to him like how he does in the present day (just, not roughly), but Yoh hasn't gotten comfortable enough yet to drop the formalities - or, he simply may not be sure if he can.

Navigating formalities and when to drop them is tricky, and requires some degree of social intuition. Generally speaking, Segasaki dropping a speech level should be a sign that it might be okay for Yoh to drop as well (not to the same level of course, just a little less formal) - but given how Yoh sees them as living in different worlds, and how fearful he is of being hated, it's unlikely that he'd want to touch the status quo.

Y: あの人の気持ち？ Y: That person's feelings?

Yoh's pretty much stuck to the phrase "that person" when referring to Segasaki this whole episode, even during his flashback. He tends to do this when he's feeling some distance between them (like in Ep 2).

On screen messages: Y: What is Kintsuba? S: You don't even know what Kintsuba is? Y: I'm sorry [Yesterday] S: I'll be back late today Y: Understood [Today] (unread) S: Just give the editor some kind of excuse, and come back right now

A: 随分　追い込まれてたねぇ Y: 気持ちを言葉にするとか　あんまりしたことなくて Y: 他人の気持ちなんて　なおさら A: You've pretty much been cornered, huh?* Y: Putting feelings into words and all... I've never really done that myself... Y: Let alone (doing that for) another person's feelings. *This is in reference to Man-san asking Yoh to write out Segasaki's feelings

A: めちゃくちゃにしてやる, めちゃくちゃにして..x10 A: Gonna mess you up, mess you up... x 10

Yes, this does sound like a line straight out of a bad Jp AV 🤣🤣. I mean, we're talking about scenes from Man-san's manga right? That they had to mosaic out? 🤣🤣

Now you know why Segasaki is pissed.

S: 可奈美さんも一緒に仕事してるんですか？ M: すみません！瀬ケ崎さんにご報告もせずに進めてしまって S: いや、可奈美さんのせいじゃないですよ S: Kanami-san, are you also doing your work together with him? M: I apologize! We ended up moving forward without even alerting you about it! S: No, it's not your fault, Kanami-san

You can tell Segasaki has misunderstood here - he thinks Man-san has also been called to work at this Editor's place, and is completely not listening to what she has said, hence her ?? reaction 🤣

S: あ、すみません 急用ができてしまったので葉を迎えに来ました S: Ah, I apologize An urgent matter arose, and so I've come to pick Yoh up.

Segasaki's being quite formal here, but this is not the way to be polite. The "proper" way to request leave to go home early on behalf of someone else would be to first, apologize specifically for the disruption, introduce yourself and your relation to that person, apologize that an urgent matter has come up, regrettably but firmly insist that said person must return home immediately on pain of death, apologize again for all the trouble caused, promise to make up for it, humbly ask for understanding, and then apologize your way out the door.

So yes, despite the polite word forms this is quite rude, and is so far removed from Segasaki's usual "public mode" that it cracks me up. Segasaki's composure is unravelling by the second in these next few scenes - he is pissed and absolutely does.not.give.a.shit. 🤣

From right to left: S: So, this bastard is the famed Editor huh... S: Don't you dare try to deceive and pull tricks on Yoh! S: The hell you doing touching him like that so freely!! A: Who (is this)?

The language gets progressively ruder the more the speech bubbles get pointy and the larger the font gets🤣🤣

M: 瀬ケ崎さん　やっぱ強いわ～ M: Segasaki-san really has a strong presence after all~

Y: 黙っててごめんなさい* S: あのさ Y: はい S: ああいうのがいいわけ？ Y: え？ S: 俺より　あの男のどこがいいわけ？ Y: I'm sorry for keeping this from you!* S: Tell me Y: Yes S: Is that what you like? Y: Huh? S: Compared to me, just how is that guy better? *Yoh uses the full but informal version of "sorry" here - gomen nasai. Making a note of this here so I can come back to it in one of the analysis posts.

Y: え、いや Y: 比べるものじゃないと思うけど。。 S: あるんだろうが　俺より　いいところが S: まあ、納得する理由がない限り俺は認めねえけどな Y: 強いて言えば　優しいかな* Y: 人の話を　ちゃんとじっくり聞いてくれるし Y: Um, no... Y: I don't think it's something that can be compared... S: There is something, isn't there? Some way in which he's better than me S: Though, unless you give me something I think is reasonable I won't accept it Y: Well if I had to say something then... maybe, he's kind?* Y: I mean, he listens carefully and attentively to what someone has to say...

*優しい (yasashii) - often translated as "kind", it encompasses the ideas of "caring", "tenderness", "thoughtful/considerate", "warm/gentle". It's often a trait people say they look for in their significant other.

This word has come up often to describe Segasaki - in Ep 2, Segasaki uses it to describe himself, in Ep 3, Yoh uses it to describe Segasaki's voice, and of course here in Ep 6, red shirt uses it to describe Segasaki again. Even when the word isn't said out loud, a lot of Segasaki's actions would fit this word - In Ep 2, when he picks up after Yoh and comforts him during their not-argument. In Ep 3, when he passes Yoh his gift, and implies there's nothing to be sorry for. In Ep 4, the way he coaxes Yoh. In Ep 5, when he takes care of Yoh. In Ep 6, he speaks up for Yoh in the cafeteria when he doesn't have to, when he goes to help Yoh. The irony of this moment is that Segasaki puts in a lot of effort and probably does pride himself in being yasashii, and he listens to Yoh better than Yoh listens to himself, and yet he hears from Yoh that he isn't yasashii or attentive, which explains the pained expression on his face.

S: あ、そう S: 俺先行くわ* S: Oh, is that so? S: I'm going ahead then* *わ (wa) - this ending particle puts emphasizes one's statement, but is not one that Segasaki usually uses. It's less forceful that his usual speech, because he's quite hurt by Yoh's statements.

Y: かばんに入ってたやつ　戻し��いてから Y: The thing that was inside my bag, I put it back so... The way Yoh ends this sentence leaves room for a follow up - it's an invitation to continue the conversation, which we actually have not seen him do with Segasaki, and that's why he looks so dejected when Segasaki rejects that invitation by walking away.

Though it's been hinted at throughout the show, Ep 6 is where we get confirmation that Yoh's just never quite fit in with the crowd, and that Segasaki has always been in the center of it. The stark difference explains why Yoh is so afraid that one day he will do something to make Segasaki hate him, and why he reflexively rejects the idea that Segasaki could possibly love him.

This episode is painful, for both of them. For Yoh, because from the intensity of his monologues, we finally get a sense of how big a presence Segasaki is to him, and therefore, how devastating it would be to lose him. For Segasaki, because for all that he can read Yoh, for all that he has done to try and reassure Yoh of his love, he still cannot make Yoh see, cannot make Yoh hear.

"If he ended up hating me then I felt like I might die."

It is precisely Yoh's love for Segasaki that makes Yoh fear the possibility of losing him, and it is that fear that blinds, deafens and mutes Yoh to the very thing he hopes for. And it is in trying to protect himself, that he inadvertently hurts the very person he loves so much.

[opiumsturn]

LES-CHILDISH GAMBINO

IN WHICH-Chris and Y/n are in a toxic relationship. (inspo by the song les)

THERE WILL BE ANOTHER VERSION INSPIRED BY LES

warnings-Smut,use of mama,ma,baby,princess,dollface, toxic relationship, arguments,use of y/n,song lyrics,nsfw

| for better experience song is recommended and linked |

⟡C. STURNIOLO.⟡

⟡•STURNSGIRL •⟡

It was dark with only colored and flashing illuminating lights around. People drunk and wasted, others making out, and some smoking.

I was at a party I don't know whos but who evers it was it didnt matter. I was in an argument with my boyfriend before we came here but not to mention he was also here sneaking glances at me and smirking even staring me dead up and down holding a red solo cup. He was pissing me off more than I already was, girls dancing on him and touching all up on him, kissing them even. I did the same at this point. Grinding my hips and swaying on other guys, drunk. Sitting on another man's lap smoking a blunt leaving my dark red lipstick stains on the mouth of the blunt and other guys face's.

FLASHBACK.

"YOU'RE A FUCKING MESS? YOUR WHOLE LIFE IS AND IM ALWAYS IN THE MIX OF IT."

"IM A MESS? YOU'RE HERE FUCKING WITH OTHER GIRLS?" I yell at chris with my mascara running down my cheeks wondering how i got into this in the first place.

"YEAH? AND I CAN BECAUSE NO ONE KNOWS, ABOUT.. US!?" He saying swinging his hand

"CHRIS REALLY? WHAT EVEN ARE 'WE' AT ONE POINT YOU WERE SOME ONE I REALLY LOVED. WHEN IM DEPRESSED YOU'RE SOMEONE I'LL RUN TO, BUT NOW I CANT EVEN TALK TO YOU ABOUT ANYTHING!"

I say silencing him as i wipe tears and run out the door with my purse hanging off my shoulder and my matching black and red out fit in my hand.

Chris chose my outfit, dressing me as a complete slut.

The outfit was a tight black corset with red accents within the ribbons that laced the top with the back of it only being a the ribbon, so my back was fully exposed. Topped with a small red bow at the middle of the corset between my boobs. The matching extreme short and tight shiny skirt it came with not even fully covering my ass also topped with a red bow at the, and see through black tinted tights that only dimmed my shade of legs. I decided with a red bow in my hair and red bottom platform heels with red bows in the back.

I got ready at my friend Maya's house for the party not seeing Chris until we got there.

END OF FLASHBACK.

I get off the boys lap im in, walking to the bar stumbling, and barely managing to walk ordering a lemonade and vodka mix, and dowing it within seconds on my way to the dance floor, but im stopped.

"Hey pretty lady, can i make you my toy tonight?" A man says coming to me trying to slide his hands to my waist.

*les by childish gambino starts to play*

"No she wont and shes not a fucking toy asshole." Chris says coming up from my side snaking his arm around my waist pulling me towards his side and moving me away.

"Oh your claiming me again?" i say rolling my eyes crossing my arms.

"Fuck you. Can i have this dance?" he says sliding both his hands to my waist down to my ass gripping it causing me sway around him.

Lights flashing

Chris's arms around me

Spinning me around

Gripping and grabbing on me

Kissing me.

colors everywhere.

My vision lost around and everywhere.

"C'mon Doll." He says in a more demanding way grabbing my wrist to a room upstairs closing the door behind us as we enter.

He immediatly starts gliding his tounge on my mouth giving his own enterance picking me up from my ass not breaking the sloppy makeout we were in. I could taste the alcohol, and weed in him and I know he could taste the same in me. He starts to kiss down my neck and down my boobs til he reached the top of my corset his arms curling around my back lifting me up pulling the strings of my corset as well as my corset it’s self off throwing them off. Childish gambino muffled still playing outside of the red dim lit room with candles.

'Baby you're the baddest. Baby you're the baddest girl and uh-'

Trailing off as Chris has ripped off my skirt, and tights already while I kick off my heels. Chris groaning against my skin kissing, and rubbing up my thigh. Pulling my red thong to the side wiping his two finger up, and down a few times still kissing on me before licking a stripe onto my wet core making him groan, causing vibrations to be sent through my body allowing me to moan. His tounge flicking up, sliding his fingers into me curling up, and down,pumping in and out,sucking and kissing on my pussy, muffled groans and high pitched moans tugging on his hair ever so lightly while his other hand rubs the top of my clit. Til I feel the knot in my stomach.

"oh sh-shiiittt..umph c-hri..FUCKK..MM-gonna c-" I moan not even finishing before I release on chris

"Fuck baby you did so good mmph mama." He huffs out breathless.

He cleans me up. Tying my corset, and putting my skirt and thong back on. He pulls me into his chest from my waist standing me up.

"look baby im sorry. i wanna try,and i know, im an awful guy and im always but i wanna try and i know im a piece of shit but we can make this work."

"make it work by fucking our ways into apologies everytime?!" I reply

"no mama please listen. we can work i know it. im sorry baby. forgive me please?" He apologizes

I dont reply and just kiss him as a 'its okay'. but really we knew it wasnt. Our relationship is a mess and always has been. Hes out with other girls hurting me, but 'he will change' according to him.

2 days pass and again chris is away somewhere. Until I get a text.

CHRIS🫀

Chris🫀- hey dollface can i come over ?

why?-me

Chris🫀- cs i want too?

Sorry. Yeah u can-me

^- loved by CHRIS🫀

I put my phone down and huffed. I got up off the couch and got ready for chris. about 15 minutes had passed and there was a knock at my door. I run downstairs to go open the door and to no one's surprise it was chris.

"Hey mamas" He says hugging me by my waist.

"Hey baby" I say taking in his embrace while he lets go and walks away, I close the door and walk over to chris.

"why'd u wanna come over?" I ask

"so I can see my pretty girl?" he says in a duh tone

I chuckle as I straddle his lap and lean into his soft lips for a small kiss.

"why dont we go to my house, hm?" he says holding my lower waist

"but chris-"

"I know, I know, every time we see each other im taking you home but cmon"

"fine."I sigh.

They get home

"Mmph chris!" I moan into the kiss. As soon as we got home we were kissing in the bathroom making out and moaning. I hope nobody catch us.. but I kinda hope they catch us.

"shh baby their gonna catch us."

"sorry." i whisper

We went on for around an hour fucking in the bathroom while nick and matt were home still.

"fuuck you did so good princess" he breaths out kissing my temple, cleaning me up.

I cant manage any words still huffing out catching my breath

"did i fuck u dumb ma?" he chuckles picking me up and laying me in bed dressing me in his fresh love set.

"th..thank you baby" I managed as he dressed me.

He just kissed my head and walks to the closet changing

"wanna go get food mama?" he asks

"please" I say softly still dumb fucked.

"can you even walk?" he giggles

I try to stand up he fail almost falling as he grabs me holding me up he chuckles softly before speaking.

"c'mon mama i got you dont worry" he says holding me stable as i take step after step hoping nick and matt dont see us.

we walk out the house and he sits me down in the passenger seat and buckles my seat belt for me kissing my temple before going to his side

"can we get chic fil a?" i ask softly

"yes mama" he says intertwining our fingers and resting them on my thigh.

"you know i love you right?" chris speaks up

i look at him confused as because our 'relationship' if you can even call it that is a mess. Hes out kissing and sleeping with other people and everytime he sees me hes taking me home. As if im one of his hoes. We were a mess mentally. Both of us and us together.

"baby your the baddest girl i know. i love you so much and im so sorry for everything ive done i love you and care about you. no body else matters. only you ma." he says

"what?.. i- chris.. you mean that?" i say on the verge of tears.

"yes my princess." he says squeezing my hand

"i love you too. im sorry for everything and-"

"dont be sorry ma" he says cutting me off stopping at a red light giving me a quick but sweet and passionate kiss.

naz speaks- this took so long and its short nd sucks ass im gonna cry.. but i love this song sooo..

request are open feel free to leave them!

@is4belle and I's tiktokt acc-sturnsma.

[k4shixe]

Broken Heart. part 2

Characters; fem!reader, Gojo Satoru, Toji Fushiguro (gn!reader aswell)

Warnings; break up, meeting ex, drinking alcohol, partying, drunk, fighting, not proof read

Word count; 1.5k

Summary; After your break up your friends dragged you along for a party and you met someone new.

Here is Part 1

A few days after the break up with Gojo, lets just say you were more then at rock bottom. You sobbed and cried all day while listening to sloppy, sad depressing music which you said to yourself that you would never do. A few of your friends had to come and help you around so that you dont live in a dumpster. The days you did go to work, you noticed your coworker, the one who made you feel worthless and took everything from you, got demoted due to "complaints" and you couldn't help but smirk to yourself. Plus she avoided you twice as much so now you didnt have to see her ugly face. Guess it worked out after all.

Your friends on the other hand tried everything to make you do something but you were always "tired" so they gave up after a while. And as promised, you had gotten up to get a glass of water when you heard a buzz on your phone. Thinking it was one of your friends you looked at the text notification to see it was Gojo. You threw your phone at the couch and took a deep breath before picking it up. You knew you should have blocked him but you still have a little hope.

Gojo: Hey love, can we talk?

You didnt know how to reply to that. How could you? You didnt want to hear him out because there was nothing to say. He was caught red handed and basically pleated guilty. So you switched off your phone and turned on the tv. You got another text but this time from your friends.

Friend 1: Y/n! We're going out to the club today you should come!

Friend 2: Yeah, maybe you can find a better guy then that asshole you dated

Friend 1: Exactly! We are picking you up at 6 so get ready alright!

Leaving the messages on read, you sighed to yourself as you went to your bedroom. You had to get ready or else they'll drag you to the club in your pj's and what if you do find a nice guy? You need to look your best. So you spent the next few hours getting ready, ready to be the prefect person you were always meant to be. As you heard your friend's car pull up in your drive way you checked in the mirror one last time to make sure everything was perfect. Makeup. Great. Outfit. Spectacular. And lastly your phone. You walked out the door feeling like you owned the world and your friends hyped you up especially since this is the first time in a week you've left the house for something personal to do.

Entering the club, you eyes scanned over everyone inside, especially the men who seemed drunker then ever. Was the club that good? Before you could say anything, mostly about going home, your friends dragged you to a booth and ordered a few drinks.

"Cmon y/n! Have some fun!"

"Guys i dont think this is a good idea"

"Nonsense! Just have one!"

So you did, but one turned into 3 then 5 and it just kept going until the point you lost count.

Your friends eventually pushed you to the dance floor where everyone else was and you felt alive. The music was loud and pumping through your veins, the drinks made you loosen up a lot and you had forgotten everything that happened. You signalled to your friend that you'd be sitting down at your booth and began walking towards it once they gave you a thumbs up. Looking towards your booth, your vision blurry you didnt notice you bumped into someone.

"Oh my god! Im so sorry!" You say repeatedly.

"Its okay. Im fine. That was nothing" a deep voice replied. Looking up you see a tall man with dark black hair looking at you.

You nodded and you both carried on with what you were doing but you couldn't get the guys face out of your head. He was a fit looking man with a cut on from the top to the bottom of his mouth. Dang it. You should of asked for his name. You looked around to see if you could spot him again but no use. However what you did see was 10 times worse. Your ex, Gojo, was at the very same bar with his friends and from the looks of it, he was walking right towards you.

"Hey y/n." All the alcohol you had just disappeared and you didnt have blurry vision. Atleast not from the drinks. You friends noticed the tears that were threatening to spill out and rushed over to you.

"Hey what the hell is you problem?"

"Yeah, last time I checked your status was cheater"

You can not emphisias more on how much you love your friends. Gojo ignores them, looking directly at you, his blue eyes showing more then what he was willing to show. But all you could remember was the feeling of betrayal.

Your friends had caused quiet a commotion to the point some people started recording and others started to try break up the fight. You were too busy trying to hold your emotions together, your mind swirling through each thought. It was when you felt a hand on your shoulder that you finally came back to reality.

"You caused quiet a scene, huh Gojo. Leave the poor girl alone" the voice sent shivers down your spine at how calm he sounded. His deep voice was a reminder to who he was and upon looking up you were right. The same man with the cut on his mouth.

"Step aside. I wasn't talking to you." Gojo says as he walks up to the man who is supposedly named Toji. They were standing head to head to each other with your poor self in between them.

"I thought your single now that you cheated with that lame ass women" Toji says as he tilts his head in a mocking smile. No words come from Gojo but a glare was evident as Toji put an arm around your waist and pushed Gojo as you walked together. You were still processing everything, you wanted to turn around to see if Gojo was looking but you knew he was but you turned around anyway and sure he was. You couldn't lie, the satisfaction you felt seeing him with his eyes wide looking directly at you was amazing. You turned around realising the hand tighten a little around your waist and you became a little uncomfortable. You looked towards the ground and took a deep breath.

"Uh thank you for your assistance, but I can take care of myself." You say trying to get away from the man.

"Really? I saw how you were back there. And we both know that dumb fuck will follow you just to talk to you. He has nothing better to do."

Toji says with a slight chuckle. "Atleast let me take you home pretty lady" he says as he holds his hand out. "Ugh fuck me." You mumble not sure of what to do. "Oh? Can I really?" He gives you a smirk before looking behind you to see Gojo still staring. "Great. Let's go then" he puts his arm around your shoulders and takes you out of the bar, calling over a taxi to drive you.

"Y/n! Wait!" The familiar voice shouted out, the one that used to bring you comfort. "Why are you going with him!"

"Satoru, its not your problem is it now? Besides he's my new boyfriend"

Gojo stared at you with shock. "Y/n please. I'll do better I promise. Give me one more chance!" He pleaded with you, looking at you with such intensity.

"Im sorry. But I cant. I trusted you." You say looking down holding back the tears.

"Thats right. Now go to that side chick, she'll love to have you." Toji turned you around with a hand gently placed on your back.

"Bye Satoru." You whisper quietly as a tears rolled down your cheek. You and Tojo both got into the taxi as he flipped Gojo off and the taxi started driving down the street. "Boyfriend huh? I like the wound of that" he whispered closely to your ear with a smirk.

A/n: Here's a part 2 since some of you guys wanted one! Sorry for it being written later. I didnt know if I should do toji or geto but I think toji and Gojo dont like eachother from what I know so I thought it was better. Hope you enjoy!

Part 2 tag: @labelt-san @ritsatoru @multi-fandom-fanfic

(Sorry if u didnt wanna be tagged. Message me if you want to be removed)

[alchemic-writings]

A Welcome Distraction Chapter 1

Modern AU Mhin/Reader. Updates will be posted sooner on ao3 @/panichoodie

Story will be 18+

Three months ago you broke up with your partner of five years and now have no idea what to do with your life. You wish someone else could make decisions for you in life. When your friends suggest finding a dom to find direction in life, you would have never expected to discover the hot dom you found online to be your distant coworker.

A deep sigh leaves my lips as I slam the shot glass down against the bar. The vodka burns but it’s good. That means I can still feel. “God, sparrow, you need to slow down a bit. We’re here to have fun, not to forget.” There’s Ais, somehow being the voice of reason after insisting we have shots the second we walked up to the bar. “C’mon Icy, getting blackout drunk is how you have fun!” And there’s the second devil on my shoulder, Vere. I let out a deep sigh as I lowered my head down onto the counter. 

We’ve been going out to this same shitty bar every week since I broke up with my ex, Quinn, three months ago. Even though I never regretted my decision, I’ve now realized how I have absolutely no idea what I want to do with my life. All my plans followed them. I had nothing for myself and I began feeling more like their shadow. 

Vere continued to list off his ideas of “fun” while I continued my depressing monologue. It wasn’t until they used my back to rest both of his elbows up and cup his own face did I tune into his words again, “And, we need to get you laid! When was your last hookup anyways?” A blush rose to my cheeks as I glared at him, “You two know exactly when my last hookup was.” Vere looked at me with wide eyes before leaning back to begin cackling hysterically. I used the lack of weight on my back to sit up again, I turned to my other side and saw Ais giving me a shit-eating grin, assholes. “HAHAHA oh my god! You’re telling me you haven’t slept with anyone since our shitty threesome three months ago?” 

I put my face in my hands and groaned. The first weekend after my breakup us three went out for drinks just like this. I got completely hammered and when Vere and Ais were getting ready to leave I begged them to stay with me. My apartment was so cold now without Quinn and I didn’t want to be alone. The sex was going as well as three people on a queen sized mattress could have until I started sobbing so hard I threw up. Ais helped clean me up and lay me down to sleep and I vowed to never sleep with those two again out of sheer embarrassment. Sadly the two have never let me live down said embarrassment by giving me the nickname Chunks. 

“Vere, they don’t have to fuck away the pain like you do. Maybe they just need time to let themselves breathe on their own. Don’t force yourself to sleep around if you don't want to, ok?…” I lift my head up to smile at Ais. He can be an ass but he can also be sweet, “… Chunks…”, nevermind. Assholes. Both of them. I slam my hands down on the counter and begin to sit up, “If you two are going to laugh at my sex life all night, I’ll be leaving.” 

Before I am able to stand, Vere wraps an arm around my shoulders to force me back down. “We’re only teasing, MC! You should be using this time to do things you could never do with your bore of an ex!” I hummed in contemplation. There were lots of things I had given up to match Quinn’s lifestyle. One of the few that I didn’t was taking pole dancing classes, which led me to meeting Vere and eventually Ais as well. The taller man spoke up as well at Vere’s suggestion, “Yeah, sparrow, wasn’t that the whole reason you broke up with them in the first place? Why aren’t you doing what you want?” 

I think back to my past three months. Despite breaking up with Quinn because I wanted to change who I became for them, the only thing that I’ve done differently was that almost threesome. I finally respond, “Well, I guess it’s because I have no fucking idea what I want to do now. I was always Quinn’s Partner. I just wish I could have someone else pick something for me sometimes.” There’s a spark in Vere’s eyes when I finish my sentence, “You know,” Vere purrs, “you could always look into finding a dom to make those decisions for you.” I blush at the suggestion. 

Vere and Ais are both active in bdsm. They actually introduced the concept of a dom/sub dynamic to me and I was very interested. But when I suggested it to Quinn it got shot down as soon as I asked. “We don’t need all that fancy stuff in the bedroom, babe. You’ve been enjoying our sex, right?”  Which I had been! But bdsm sounded like… a treat. Something you don’t have everyday but when you do you love it. 

But after the past three months of being lost while going through the motions at work and drinking on the weekends, Vere’s suggestion feels like a need. Having someone tell me what to do could help quiet my thoughts long enough to finally get over my breakup…

I let out a long breath as the idea of finding a dom becomes more and more desirable. “Even if I wanted to find one… How on earth would I do that? Just walk around with a sign that says ‘please dominate me’?” A grin grows on Vere’s face at my solution as he responds, “As much as I want to say yes to your suggestion, I feel sorry for you and will actually help you.” Ais speaks up behind us, “Wow, you’re being helpful, Vere? This must be serious.” Vere’s eyes flit to Ais, “You’ve seen how depressing they’ve been for the past three months. Getting them a dom will be helpful for all of us.” 

A chuckle leaves my lips as I look down at my hands. Despite how many walls these two put up and how annoying they can be, they truly care about me. My head turns back up to Vere, “So, how do I do this then?” “Well, this might be a little too high tech for you but there are these things called apps where you can find people who want the same thing as you online.” I roll my eyes, “I know what a social app is, fuckwad, tell me which one.” Ais gives a hum in contemplation as he pulls out his own phone. “There’s a pretty good amount out there, but the best one for a newbie like you would probably be ‘Collared’. Pretty user friendly.” He slides his phone across the counter towards me and I peer at the screen in front of me. It uses a distance radius to filter users into certain groups where you can start discussion threads and has a private messages feature as well. I hum in agreement and pull out my own phone to search for the app but I’m stopped when Vere steals my phone, “Ah ah ah, dear! I don’t trust you to make your own profile.” I reach out to try to grab my phone from his grip, “What do you mean you don’t trust me? I just have to put some information in and it’s done!” A tug on my shirt pulls me backwards as Ais speaks up, “I dunno, sparrow. You’ve been out of the social pool for a long time and you’ve never been with a dom before. At least let us help you get started.” 

My shoulders slump as I admit defeat. It’s true that I haven’t even winked at someone for the past five years, so making my own profile would probably result in scarring anyone in a 30 mile radius. Vere’s smirk grows as he pockets my phone and stands up, “Already playing the submissive role so well! Keep this up and we’ll find you a dom in no time.” He turns and begins walking towards the front of the bar, thus missing the daggers shooting from my eyes as Ais and I stand up to follow him outside. 

It isn’t until I take a deep breath of the cool night air does Vere turn back towards the two of us, “Let’s spend the night at my place tonight. We’ll be able to work on your profile and set up some cute pictures as well.” We all agreed to his plan, seeing as how Vere has the biggest apartment out of the three of us and the largest collection of… clothes… that would be fitting for an app like this. 

Once we enter Vere’s apartment he immediately goes towards his walk-in wardrobe and begins to assess the collection. Vere holds up items to my body before making a face of approval or disgust, and throws all the items approved on to Ais to hold. Once Vere is satisfied with the assortment of items, he takes me into the closet and instructs me on which items to put on first. As I’m changing into barely anything I can hear the two typing on a laptop and discussing to themselves. Every few minutes one of them yells out a question from the form for me to respond to, but my answers are quickly vetoed and they type something they deem as “sexier”. 

I step out once I’ve finished changing, and I receive a wolf whistle from Ais and a proud smirk from Vere in response. As I awkwardly shuffle from side to side a squeak is made by the rubbing of the latex underwear. Vere had given me an all black attire; a corset top, a pair of latex underwear, and a garter belt with thigh high stockings. Ais stands up and begins to circle me, “Hmm, you did a great job but I think they’re forgetting something.” Vere’s eyebrow twitches at his critique, “What could I have possibly missed? They look fucking hot.” Ais doesn’t respond and instead retreats into the closet himself before coming back holding a piece of leather, “a collar.” Ais stands behind me as his arms loop around my front to help secure the strip of leather around my neck. It’s a simple black piece of leather with an o-ring on the front and a buckle clap in the back, but having it secured against my neck sends a shiver down my spine. 

Ais’s hands rest on my shoulders as he leans his head against mine, “Doesn’t sparrow look like a present now waiting to be ripped open?” Vere slinks towards us and cups my cheek as he responds, “Hmm, I hate to admit it but you’re right. The collar was an excellent addition.” I awkwardly laugh as I step to the side, removing myself from the reach of the two men. “Thanks for hyping me up, guys, but aren’t we supposed to be setting up my profile?...” They both shared a look before laughing. Ais is the first one to speak up, “You are so easy to fluster, sparrow. You’re definitely gonna find a dom by the end of the night.” Vere pulls out his phone as gestures to the bed, “Get up there so I can take some pictures. Don’t worry about how to pose, I’ll tell you.” 

After thirty minutes of blushing while being told how to position my body, Vere seemed satisfied with the pictures taken and dropped them to his laptop so we could choose the best ones for my profile. After adding a few pictures to my gallery we finally settled on which one will be my profile picture. It's a picture of me sitting up on the bed with my legs bent in front of me and one finger looped around the ring of the collar. My head was cropped out of it “for your safety and to make you seem mysterious,” explained Ais. Vere was next as he shooed Ais away to take his place in front of the laptop and began a new thread on the forum. 

[DreadfulHands Started a New Thread]  [1:10 am]

Hiiii everyone! I’m a sub that’s new to bdsm after leaving my loser ex of 5 years! I’m local to Eridia and I’m looking for a dom that can really show me the ropes ;) 

Vere sat back crossing his arms with a pleased smile on his face. I stared at the screen in horror until I heard a snort to my left. Ais was biting his lip to keep the laughter down but his grin betrayed him. These assholes! I reach over to delete the paragraph before Vere catches my hand. We have a stare down before I attempt again with the other and this leads us to begin fighting for control of the other's hands. I’m almost able to reach the keyboard until I’m lifted in the air by Ais, whose arms are wrapped around my torso. In a state of panic I kick my legs out, and end up accidentally sending the laptop tumbling to the carpeted floor. “What the fuck Chunks!” Vere sits up to pick up his laptop and assess the damage. Anger boils in my veins, “What the fuck to me? You’re the one trying to make me sound like a sex bot!” Vere rolls his eyes as he responds, “It was just a joke, I wasn’t actually going to-” he stops himself as he stares at the screen. 

A heavy silence fills the room as we wait for Vere to continue. Ais slowly sets me down as he begins to walk towards Vere, “What did you do?”. As Ais now looks at the screen another pause fills the room. Anxiety fills me as I walk over to them and turn my head so I can see what’s wrong.

[Forum Thread Created 1 min ago] [27 Views] [3 comments] 

Another silence falls as all three of us stare at the screen… “Technically you were the one that kicked my laptop so you posted it yourself…” I snap out of my shock and turn to Vere, “I don’t fucking care who posted it! Just delete it before too many people see it!” Ais lays a hand on my shoulder and shakes his head, “That’s the one drawback about Collared, you can’t delete threads unless you’re a mod.” I sink to the floor and put my face into my hands and sigh, “Maybe I’m not meant for this…” Vere sets the laptop to the side and sinks down with me, “Don’t be like that! Maybe someone will find your sex bot attitude sexy and want to still be with you! I know there are plenty of desperate losers on there that-” Vere is cut off by a notification sound, several to be exact. We turn back to the laptop and click on the notifications. 

[1:11 am] [LatexBookworm commented on your post: “Welcome to the community! :D”]

[1:13 am] [Melvin78 commented on your post: “Very nice…”]

[1:13 am] [xxbl00dwh0r3xx commented on your post: “r u into bloodplay??”]

Ais lets out a chuckle, “Well, maybe that post wasn’t so bad after all…” We all let out a chuckle before another notification popped up. 

[1:14 am] [(MOD) StarRaven sent you a private message]

I let out a sigh of relief at the notification, “A mod! I can just ask them to delete that thread and we can redo a proper introduction.” I click on the notification to lead me to the private message board

[1:14 am] (MOD) StarRaven:

Are you stupid?

[beevean]

Top 10 favorite CV characters!

I remember when you sent me this ask a year ago! I was in the middle of playing CoD and I still had other games to go lol. Well...

10) Julia. She deserves more than for being remembered for an awkward romance plot :( I like her coy attitude towards Hector, and I'm intrigued by the implications that she's repressing her pain for the Isaac situation, for the sake of assisting the man who wants to kill her brother.

9) Walter. Honestly for a guy just meant to be Beta Dracula, the dude is very fun! He's like a Dracula if he didn't even pretend to have a shred of decency or justification :P dude just wants to play with his food because he's bored, and he's entertainingly cruel about it, from deliberately turning the women he kidnaps for shit and giggles to subjecting Joachim to a fate worse than death. Proof that villains don't always need a tragic backstory, as long as they have style.

8) Joachim. I warmed up to the guy! He reeks of "cut from development", because his concept is very fascinating and he's so wasted as a random boss. He's antagonistic to Leon because he's a haughty vampire who clearly thinks he deserves at least his castle lol, but also to Walter because holy shit the dude really punished him in an exemplary manner. That art of him looking out of his mind says a lot. Also he has very cool powers that make him a joy to use in Joachim Mode.

7) Leon. A pure, noble-hearted knight, so honest that he won't even take a sword that didn't belong to him, who only wished the wellbeing of his fiancée and his best friend... and oh. Oh how he paid for it :) Leon's story is utterly miserable, made even worse by how he ends his game with the most depressing canonical ending imaginable. My man has immense mental fortitude, and I love the scene where he angrily rejects Mathias' offer of immortality because he'd rather honor Sara's dying wish, unlike a certain vampire we know... but he didn't know that, by swearing revenge on the newly-turned Mathias, he'd doom his own lineage to a lifetime of terrible pressure...

6) Rosaly. girl <3 I once again have to thank Ayami Kojima and Kou Sasakura for breathing life into this character, especially the latter. She's just an aggressively kind girl who will love you to death. Even if others think she's too nice or too trusting, she stubbornly helps people because she likes to do so. And I find it a very interesting detail that she seems absolutely unconcerned with Hector's past: she only sees the good in him, without the baggage. I find her endearing :)

5) Trevor. He's the Sonic of Castlevania. He's shaped like a friend <3 I like what personality we can glean from CV3: that despite being shunned by people for his powers (now where did I hear that before) he was ready to accept the quest of slaying Dracula - he didn't even do it for the Legacy, he's just that much of a brave guy! - and he was able to easily befriend and lead all sorts of people, hinting at his charisma and at his good heart. And of course in CoD he's just sass central :P I forgive his weird hostility against Hector because, despite his cockiness and ferocity, I like how he still takes the time to give credit to his friends for their victory <3

4) Dracula. The bastard himself :) I really like how, by being the most recurring character in the series, he ended up being quite fleshed out. His tragic story does little to justify how much of a hypocritical asshole he is. He loves so intensely, yet so selfishly. He wants his son by his side, but only after cutting his human heritage. He takes two abused boys under his wing, but only to raise them as his loyal knights and forgerers of armies. And overall, you can see the degradation of his morals and even his personality through the centuries, as he loses a piece of his humanity with every resurrection... not that he was a saint as a human, either.

3) Shanoa. Things Shanoa deserved: the world. Things Shanoa did not deserve: all the shit that happened to her :) it's hard to make an interesting character out of an amnesiac without emotions, yet Shanoa is intriguing. This girl who was taken in by Ecclesia as a young child, raised to become a weapon to vanquish all evil yet constantly protected by Albus... even when she loses everything, even when she learns that her entire life is a lie and for her beloved mentor she was nothing more than a lamb to the slaughter, she still wants to fight, she still chooses to sacrifice herself. And by the end, she finds a place to live in Wygol Village, after rescuing and befriending all the villagers. also she kitty :3

2) Isaac. A pathetic wet cat of a man <3 just terrible in every way <3 miserable and bitter and ready to make it everyone else's problem <3 genuinely tragic backstory of terrible loss that makes you pity him but never to the point of excusing his terrible actions <3 how much he strives to be nothing but a tool and dying as one (and a defective one too) <3 absolute banger of a theme too <3

Hector. I just think he's neat.

:P

I talked enough about the guy. I know that he's basically a smoothie of Alucard and Guts. But something about his journey of self affirmation, how he chose to serve Dracula out of a need to belong somewhere then chose to put his principles above his trauma but still paid the consequences for his past alliance and betrayal, the parallels with Isaac and Dracula showing that yes you can fall into evil but you can rise again as many times as you want, his development thanks to Rosaly, his struggle with his own humanity and powers... It just speaks to me, what can I say.

[stormblessed95]

Do you mind if I ask your top 10 favorite characters (can be male or female) from all of the media that you loved (can be anime/manga, books, movies or tv series)? And why do you love them? Sorry if you've answered this question before.....Thanks....

Hi! This is an impossible question (i love these questions). Because I fall in love with characters so easily 😅 and I hyperfixate HARD. lol, so if you asked this 6 months ago, or ask again in another 6 months or with slightly different parameters, you'd likely get a totally different list from me. 😂 but I'll give you some of my most current top 10 character loves. And before ANYONE JUDGES ME, I'm well aware these characters being my favorites heavily implies I need therapy... I already know! Also, I'm still fairly new to anime. There is still ALOT I haven't seen. SO in no particular order, some of my top 10 favorites (and yes, I'll probably cheat and name more than 10 if i have multiple favs from one series, im not sorry):

Kaladin Stormblessed/Jasnah Kholin - From Stormlight Archive (Book)

I relate to Kaladins struggle with depression alot, not only that, but his strength and courage and the way he is always ready to step up to help and protect others. Jasnah is a queen, she is such a strong woman and a role model of a character and so wise. And a total and complete badass. Smarter than everyone in the room? Yes. Blow up a man who attempts to mug her? Also yes. 😍

Zuko - From ATLA (TV Show)

The ultimate redemption arc and childhood crush character! A badass, a sweetheart, an asshole but with a caring heart and that endearingly awkward struggle of him trying to make friends. He is just so cool

Itachi Uchiha/Kakashi Hatake - From Naruto (Anime)

I can't pick between them and you can't make me! They are both so OP, so cool, so badass, so dramatic and have the best fight scenes and the ability to make me emotional as fuck

Olivier Armstrong/Roy Mustang - From Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood (Anime)

Roy's revenge arc 😳😍 lol plus we love a badass man who loves the people around him and also doesn't mind knowing when he needs to let the others around him step up! General Armstrong, man idk if I wanted to be her when I grow up or be WITH her. Probably both. She is the KING. She is the toughest in the room. She takes no bullshit. I'm obsessed with her. When her and teacher were working together for a bit? I was in love. Lol

Hua Cheng- From TGCF (Donghua)

Obsessive, protective, will do anything for his love, will be his most devoted worshiper? Takes no shit? Is the strongest MF out there? Soft for the love of his life only? Is it lowkey a little toxic when I put it this way? A little. Lmfao am I in love with it anyway? Yes. He is like the definition of scary dog privilege lmao

Kaz Brekker - From Six of Crows (Book)

He IS the smartest person around and he will let you know about it. And he will pull off the impossible with no one knowing how he did it. He has got plans upon plans. And not only that, but he uses a cane, has a disability, has chronic pain, has the most intense ptsd. And it's written SO WELL and it's SO RELATABLE (the chronic pain part, not the rest of his tragic as fuck backstory) and he is the most insane badass.

Inosuke/Akaza - From Demon Slayer (Anime)

Inosuke is just fucking insane and I love that so much. Lmfao literally child raised by wolves, is a loveable beast type character. 😂 I just want his happiness. And I love that he is an absolute weirdo and also a badass. Akaza is just.... such a good character so far! Lol and don't think that just because he is my favorite, I'm not rooting for the demon slayers to get their revenge! I am! I just also love him and I love how he is also insane, loves being powerful and I just know his backstory is probably going to make me cry. The way this show makes me SOB all the time!

Vin/Kelsier - From Mistborn (Book)

Listen, does Vin suffer as a character from "not like all the other girls" syndrome, yes. Do I LOVE everything about her and how stupidly strong and badass she is anyway? Yes. I also love that the book has HER saving the male love interest and being the white knight too instead of the other way around as per usual. Kelsier is a genius and a madman and a crazy murderer.... and I love him so much. The man has ZERO CHILL AND IS DRAMATIC TO THE CORE. I love everything about that honestly.

Nico Di Angelo/Percy Jackson - From PJO series (Book)

I'm having a hard time explaining myself for all of these and not just repeating "i just love them okay?!" Lol Look, Percy is THAT guy. He is the hero. He is the perfect boyfriend. He is the ultimate crush for everyone in the series. Lol he is loyal to a literal fault. He has the darkness and rage inside him that he keeps leashed and let's out whenever he needs to. Nico is RIGHT UP THERE TOO. The powerhouses these 2 are! Nico is scary and grumpy and adorable and just needs to be loved and they've been through so much and I just need them to have the happiest of endings. Nico deserves the world. He is also scary dog privilege too. He is perfection and speaks deeply to my emo kid heart.

Octavia Blake - From the 100 (TV Show)

I'm forever and Octavia sympathizer. She DID THE BEST SHE COULD WITH WHAT SHE HAD AND SHE SAVED EVERYONE SO MANY TIMES. She was the most badass. The underdog story and the most tragic ending to her romance and even when she lowkey went off the deepend, it was understandable. Lol that's my bitch, and I'm sticking with her!

....

So yeah, they all lowkey are lovable assholes here honestly. No one worry about me please, I'm fine Maybe i just like mean bitches who are hidden softies full of love super deep down 😅😏 Honestly, my husband is the worldest sweetest man ever. I promise my real life taste is not so filled with red flags like 85% of this list is. 🤣🤣 I fully know how this list could look lol

[blackmoonrose13]

I just wrote a long rant post, then deleted it...I regret that. TLDR US MEDICAL INSURANCE SUCKS

I am sick of taking pills...they hurt, I don't know why but I assume due to how big my pills are due to how high the dosage is, and for some reason one of them is a fucking rectangle it hurts my throat, I don't like the feel of them going down my throat any more, it just hurts. (and also having memory issues taking them but like ugh thats a different rant)

I asked the doctor who prescribes me my brain pills as I call them...yes for some reason my insurance wanted me to do that. I get why, but the doctor isn't even my therapist they are just in the same damn building. Its stupid and complicated and us medical is dumb some days.

Anyway I asked him if there is a liquid option. I remember folks talking about that. He doesn't look up if my medicines are available for that, just goes. "If they are your insurance wont cover it" I go. "Okay how about another medicine that does the same as my current pills just in liquid form?" He again, doesn't look up, doesn't check the computer which is in the office. Just waves his hand and goes. "Your insurance wont cover it." To be honest I don't think this man knows, or cares to look it up, or even know what my insurance is...it has changed a couple times and he thinks I am on an older one. Also I am technically already taking a generic of a generic so its not like my body aint used to generic options.

I also don't think he cares period and just I don't know. Any time I ask for like an alternative he goes no...but not in a flat out no we cant do this. He does this like hand waving dismissal.

Due to many friends I know who also have adhd, anxiety and depression who also take medical mary jane...listen I can't spell the name right and spell check gave up on helping me. I thought, hey a good alternative, I can take a chocolate laced with the stuff, that shouldn't hurt. I think I can do this. I asked them about it, did a bit of research on my own. Ready to talk to him about this...he once again waves it off going. "It takes a long time to get approved," I can wait if it will make me not take a lot of pills. "it will cost a lot of money." Around 600 bucks and most of that money is for the card according to mom who has helped me research. "It might not even work." That last one irked me the most because he had no issues putting me on new pills which had a slim chance of working. And him going, "We wont know till you take them for a while"

I am just tired of him doing this it seems like he doesn't care or something. I am also scared to be more assertive because the last time I got assertive with a psychiatrist (not the one I am with now), he threatened to call security on me. All I did was point out the hypocrisy he said to me and how rude it was to say what I did was frivolous when he told me I should pursue the thing.

Fun fact about that asshole he asked me why I wear so much black and when I responded honestly. "It's my fave color and things I like come in black." He told me I was deflecting and using sarcasim as a barrier. While yes my autism can make me come off like Daria, or Wednesday addams with bluntness and monotone, I was actually being honest there and open with him, when he said that comment I did clam right up again on him. You know being vulnerable and made fun off when you do that kinda makes you wanna not socialize with that person.

I am off topic.

Any way so I am just really annoyed about my situation...fun fucked up fact only reason I am ranting all this shit, is because my mom knew how in the brain fog I have been as of late and knew my issue with pills and suggested a medication she is on that does the job of two of my pills, while yes not no pill, it is one less and smaller pill for me. And while I love this idea...I remembered all the shit my doctor currently has shot down, and think that is going to happen again...I wont know till june.

Now before anyone asks me this. No I can't go to the same person my mom sees, for 2 reasons, one insurance doesn't cover her, and 2 I don't feel the most comfy sharing the same doctor as my mom. Which I think is understandable.

I just really wish living in a small town wasn't so...annoying. Hard to find good medical people near me who take my insurance...good news can find a oral surgeon that covers me...4-6 hours away.

If I have a hospital emergency I swear the hospital I go to is going to the ground, because how the fuck they treated me the last few times, sexist doctors calling me sweetie, doctors commenting on my weight when that is not why I came to the emergency room, oh the dismissal of my issues, going "I am in pain" yet go "You seem fine to me" The covid deniers oh the list goes on.

I need a drink...or something.

[purplerunawaywerewolf]

Read and share this postiñg with your family members and friends and let's come together to stop this injustice being done to our veterans.

This article's title A Navy Corpsman is left to fight on the home front by himself. 

Here is a story about how an asshole lie on social media platforms has had 

 a persistently negative impact on my children's and my daily lives that everyone should be aware of. This is where it all starts. I joined the navy air reserve on March 22, 1999, in the state of Florida, and I took an oath to defend and guard this nation. I was deployed to Mobile Inshore Undersea Warfare Unit 207, a force protection unit headquartered LoLat Naval Air Station Jacksonville, Florida, not long after taking my oath. At the time, the unit's commander was Commander Kevin Paige. I started boot camp at RTC Great Lakes Division 001 on October 5, 2000. As a naval hospital corpsman, I transferred from MIUW 207 to Naval Reserve hospital Jax 108 at Naval Air Station Jax, Florida, on December 5, 2001. I transferred from Naval Reserve Hospital 108 to USS BOONE FFG 28, which is based at Naval Air Station Mayport, Florida, on February 15, 2004. I was activated in 2006 and again in 2008 throughout my time in the military. I received an honorable discharge from the naval air reserve. I 

moved from Jacksonville, Florida, to Denver, Colorado, in 2014. I lost my job soon after moving to Colorado and soon kafter that spent some time living at the Broadway Motel. I moved to the Kings Inn Motel about two years later due to my financial situation, and I started working for Dough House whenever he had work available. If not, I would find work through a variety of temp agencies, such as Staff Zone, Ready Man, and Nationwide Temp Agency, to be able to pay for my daily rent.

On June 06 2017 Denver post published an article about the Kings Inn Motel. Visit

Denverpost.com/2017/06/06/king inn aurora-eviction-rent to read the article. The motel was renamed the Summit View Inn Motel not long after the article was published. On March 24, 2020, The Denver Post published an article about the Summit View Inn.  visit for the article at https://www.denverpost.com/2020/03/24/evictions-homeless-coronavirus-aurora-colorado



In the photograph, I'm the black man. Management kicked us off the property after the article was published, and the motel staff destroyed all of our personal items, leaving us with nothing except the clothes on our backs. Then  we moved into the Radiant inn motel while I continued working through the temp agency and paying 370 a week for rent. A major incident that occurred in 2022 completely altered my existence and tore my world apart. In Jacksonville, Florida, my father Willie Taylor Jr., a US Marine, passed suddenly. I went to his funeral in Jacksonville while still making motel payments on my room at the Radiant Inn. For several months I suffered from depression . I left the Radiant Inn Motel in the early months of 2023 because the room was full of mice. I killed eight mice inside of  the motel room during the course of a 24-hour period. When I was homeless and short on cash one day, I held a sign asking for assistance in getting a hotel room. My VA ID card was shown on the sign's front. After that, some asshole uploaded a picture of me to the internet with the phrase "fake veteran" that's when my nightmare started. Several Colorado residents tried to spit at me after that lie was posted online, and some just verbally harassed me. Others would look at me and mock me as if it were funny to them. These lies hindered me from gaining permanent employment. I started revocating Dough House rental property in April 2023 in exchange for short-term housing. I was forced to leave the property once the renovations were done. I currently pay 70 a day for a motel room at the Wolf Hotel where I currently reside. 

When this first occurred, I initially believed thAt happene to me was a rare incidence until I met with numerous other veterans who had also experienced the same thing . It is crystal clear  that someone is out there spreading lies online and having to face any consequences for the harm they have caused. This injustice toward our veterans needs to end, but it won't unless we up as a group and declare that enough is enough and that this kind of treatment of our veterans is unacceptable. Some person is  Utilizing social media to disseminate lies about us veterans has a significant negative impact on our lives. Because it doesn't directly affect their lives, the majority of people don't care about the injustice being done to us veterans, and some people just want to believe everything they read online is accurate, even though that isn't the case, which is why we are currently in this situation.  Before passing judgment on someone based solely on what they read online people shouid do their own investigation of the truth.  You may have made a huge mistake in your judgment of a person because of a lie or inaccurate information that you have been provided .  If you're the kind of person who wants to change the world for the better, we need to come together to address this injustice and make the offender responsible for the harm they have caused to us veterans. If not, their inappropriate behavior will continue with no end in sight.  Don't be the kind of person who observes this injustice being committed but chooses not to correct it.  The only thing needed for evil to win, according to a quotation ascribed to Edmund Burke, is for good men to do nothing. I'll attach my military resume for your review. You might end up changing your mind about me after seeing it.

[trademarkhubris]

hhh

[honeytae]

You’ll always be my favorite person.

okay...here we go...this is my first venture into a mini-series! this will have four or five parts i think...it’s just super fluffy friends to lovers, you know the gig. they’re idiots but...they’ll find their way eventually <3 i hope you all like this, please let me know if i did okay  tags: @ahgasearmyfan, @hoseokayy, @the1921-monsters genre: angst, fluff, IDIOTS TO LOVERS warnings: mentions of cheating, depressive themes (breakup aftermath), namjoon is in denial word count: 3.3k

In which your best friend, Kim Namjoon, helps you get over your asshole ex-boyfriend; perhaps, maybe, he was never the one you loved anyway.

Your eardrums still buzzed from all the shouting. 

Your socked feet repetitively hit the ground, bunching the fabric of your shirt in angst as the aftershocks of the breakup rung through your body. You’d been pacing your living room ever since it happened, a painful lump in your throat threatening to rear it’s head as you debated calling him.

Him. Your best friend, Namjoon. The one you could go to for anything, the only one you wanted to go to. Especially in times like this, when your hands were shaking and your chest felt tight and constricted. 

It was definitely not a good time, only a few hours before his workday began, but you felt as if you were going to drive yourself insane if you went on like this. 

Tapping on Namjoon’s contact, you caved, pressing the phone to your ear to hear the two deep notes before they abruptly stopped.

“Hello?” He rasped, clearing his throat at the gravelly voice he’d just displayed, you staying silent on the other line as guilt seeped through your veins.

“Were you sleeping?” He hears your much too awake voice say through the phone, shaky in a way that had him alert in an instant. 

“No, no,” he lied, sitting up against the headboard as his brows furrowed in worry, “what’s wrong?” he asked immediately, concern taking over his tone as he heard you hesitate, balls of his feet landing on the ground as he clutched the phone tighter at the sound of your sniffle. 

The mere question made tears collect on your water line, lower lip trembling as your face scrunched up in a silent cry that wracked your shoulders. 

Trying your best to regain your composure, you ran a hand through your hair, pushing it away from your face as your stare directed out the window adjacent to you. 

“I don’t even know how it escalated so much but we got into a fight, he left, we broke up.” You blurt out, biting down on your lip to silence the sob coming up your throat and threatening to spill out into the microphone of your device.

There was a heavy moment of silence between the two of you, one that would typically be filled with a joke or poking fun at the other for their awkwardness. But this one was tense, Namjoon’s anger bubbling in his chest echoing in the silence as you stifled your cries.

He’d been there for you for multiple breakups, being the shoulder for you to cry on each time someone broke your heart. It was heartbreaking for him as well, seeing you so shattered over someone who didn’t deserve you. Someone who didn’t deserve your love in the first place. 

“Fuck.” He mumbled, pausing for a moment at a loss for words. “Are you okay? That’s a stupid question, of course you’re not.” He answered himself, grabbing his glasses from his bedside table to slide atop his ears. 

“I’m coming over.” He announced, standing from the mattress and stumbling over to his wardrobe, pulling out a pair of sweatpants to hastily slip on as he lifted his shoulder to his ear in order to hold the phone so that he could still hear you.

Immediately, you began to shake your head no, forgetting for a moment that he couldn’t see you. 

“Joonie, don’t, I’m sorry for calling-“

“Love, I’m coming over. I’m already on my way.” 

When Namjoon arrived, you couldn’t help but collapse into his arms, his strong limbs wrapping you up in a tight hug as he shut the front door behind him. 

“I’m so sorry, love. I’m sorry.” He whispered, hand placed on the back of your head as your shoulders shook with the force of your sobs, his own heart breaking at the sound of your choked cries being muffled into his shirt. 

He stood with you in his grip for a few minutes, letting you cry in his arms as he swayed you comfortingly side to side. 

“Can I walk you over to the couch?” He inquired softly, getting a stoic nod from you in response, never lifting you head from his chest as he began shuffling both your bodies over to the living room. 

You blindly followed his lead as he lowered himself down onto the couch, placing you beside him on the cushion and welcoming you closer when you wrapped your arms around his neck. 

Rubbing his palm up and down your spine, he watched as you steadily began to breathe slower. 

“What happened?” He murmured, watching with gentle eyes as you lifted your head from his body, pouting as you sat up straight against the back of the sofa, looking down at your lap dejectedly. 

Shoulders heaving in a long sigh, you ran a hand through your hair to push it away from your face, the patience exuding from the figure next to you easing you slightly. 

“I was the one who ended things.” 

Namjoon made a quiet noise of surprise from his spot next to you, eyebrows raised slightly as his eyes widened. 

Out of all the relationships you’d been in during his time of knowing you, you’d always been the one who was broken up with. Your history with dating had left Namjoon angry time and time again at the brutal endings that had come along with it. 

“What’d he do?” He asked firmly, tone protective yet knowing as his eyes implored your sullen figure. Fiddling with your fingers, you blew out a sigh, bra it yourself for the explanation to come. 

“Do you remember Hobi’s party?” You asked, Namjoon cocking his head in confusion at the abrupt question.

“Remember when I stormed off and you had to come find me?” You elaborated, a light bulb sparking in Namjoon’s brain as he slowly nodded. Yes, he did remember that.

He remembered coming back from the restroom and not being able to find you, clueless as to where you’d gone before his friends filled him in that you’d suddenly fled without reason. 

Circling the yard several times without finding you, he walked into Hoseok’s house, poking his head into each room with no luck. 

It was when he glanced out the window of the kitchen that he saw a light outside in the dark; a phone screen lighting up none other than your face, low to the ground making him scrunch his brows in confusion before scrambling to exit the house to make sure you were okay. 

Namjoon, ever the gentle giant, couldn’t walk quietly to save his life, shoes pounding against the pavement with each long stride he took toward your hunched over frame. 

The sound of his footsteps had only jarred you slightly, setting your phone down in your lap with a sigh as he sat down beside you on the curb of his friend’s driveway. 

“How’d you end up here?” He had asked, ready to poke fun at you before he noticed the sad gleam in your eye, a frown suddenly overtaking his face as you merely shrugged in response. 

It was a complete contrast to how you’d been just before he’d left for the bathroom, laughing and singing and having fun with him and his friends. He didn’t know what could’ve possibly happened in that short time he was gone. But you were upset, which automatically made him upset.

He tensed up when he realized you might want to be left alone, opening his mouth to ask if that’s what you wanted but pausing once you scooted toward him to rest your head on his shoulder. 

He remembered the words you whispered after a few moments of heavy silence, Namjoon’s heart pounding in his chest as your hands wrapped around his bicep.

I love you.

Moments like that were the hardest for him. Of course he remembered. 

“Yeah. Well, I stormed out because he was letting this girl sit on his lap, practically making out with her.” You scoffed, picking at a string dangling from the sleeve of your shirt as you frowned at the memory.

Silence absorbing the room, you glanced up at Namjoon, unsurprised by the perturbed look on his face.

Namjoon seemed beyond appalled before the emotions on his face turned into anger, his once gaped mouth tightly shut, clenching his jaw while his eyes shot daggers at the man who was no longer in your life. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He finally spoke, facial expression hardening by the second with the new information. 

“I was embarrassed, Joon. Obviously him going to someone else is a message that I’m not enough. I didn’t want anyone to know that, not even you.” You shrugged, Namjoon’s face scrunching in confusion at your explanation.

“That’s such bullshit. He’s sleazy. That’s why he went to someone else. His actions don’t insinuate anything about you.” He fumed, causing you to shrug tiredly.

“It was fucked up, and he knew it. He apologized, said he was just drunk.” You sighed, playing with your fingers in your lap again as Namjoon listened, glancing at your side profile as you heaved another deep exhale. 

“I bought it then, but I don’t believe a word of it now. She’s been blowing up his phone ever since that night.” You confessed, Namjoon’s eyebrows knitting together at your words.

“Was he,” Namjoon started lowly, not daring to finish the sentence he had began. 

“I don’t know, I can’t prove it, but he was messaging her all the fucking time, Joon. It made me feel really weird.” You sighed, resting your elbow on the back of the couch to place your temple onto your palm, letting your eyes fall shut in exhaustion.

“I wouldn’t feel good about that either. God, what a fucking dick.” He said in disbelief, looking at your tired form with a sympathetic frown before shuffling his body closer to you.

“C’mere.”

You heard the return of his soft voice call for you, reaching his arm out behind your back to welcome you into his chest, wrapping you up in a tight hug as he rested his chin on the top of your head. 

“I’ll always be here for you.” He murmured, pressing a kiss to your hair and making you exhale a sigh against him. 

“I know you will. Thank you.” You whispered, clutching onto his soft shirt with a ball of your fist into the fabric. 

“And I’m gonna kick his ass.”

You exhaled a small wheeze at that, burying your face into his shirt, his solid figure providing a comfortable headrest for you. 

“You’re not gonna kick his ass, Joon. You’re too good for that.” You patted his shoulder fondly, sniffling against him as his hand circled your spine. 

Namjoon sighed, knowing you were right. He’d never be able to. But god, if only he was a little tougher. He’d beat any asshole who decided to toss your love away.

Tucking his neck in to look down at you, he recognized the closing of your eyelids, your breathing slowing as you fell into slumber. 

Your eyelashes fanned out onto your cheeks, the skin slightly pink from the salt that had been trailing down from your eyes earlier. Your hair was caught in the dampness, causing Namjoon to gently gather the strands and push it back behind your ears. 

Carefully turning his body around the sofa, he slowly lowered his back to the cushions, you snuggling up on his chest as his hand rested on the crown of your head. 

Staring at the ceiling, he could not fathom the fact that someone would choose anything over this. Over you. He had your love, and he threw it away. It angered Namjoon to no end.

Namjoon, who had been your protector since second grade when he’d helped you get your hair untangled from the swingset. He still remembered the vision when he’d seen it get caught from across the schoolyard, running away from the soccer game him and his friends had been playing in order to help you. 

He could still picture your big eyes staring at him as he untwisted your hair from the chain, explaining to you that he had experience doing this because it’d happened to his younger sister so many times.

You’d been quite shy then, only saying a polite thank you when he was done and taking his slightly sweaty hand to shake it when he offered it to you.

“Namjoon. I’m new.” He explained with a smile, withdrawing his hand to push his glasses up his nose before backing away from you as his friend called out for him.

“I’ll see you later!”

From that day on, you and Namjoon had steadily grown closer, running around with each other at recess and sitting together at lunch. You’d broken out of your shell with him after spending so much time together, your shyness slowly fading as he gained your trust.

As you went into middle school, you two stayed close despite every other friend duo or trio breaking up, the both of you managing to avoid drama all the way through your freshman year. 

That was the year Namjoon got his first girlfriend.

They’d only dated a few months, but he’d been left heartbroken when she wanted to split up. It was you that came to his rescue, stopping at his house with his favorite takeout and rocking him from side to side when he eventually broke down in your arms. 

You had always been there. And his crush had been too, but he’d, through years of suppressing it, gotten to a point where he could act like it wasn’t. 

After all, you were best friends. And that was enough for Namjoon. Having you in his life in any capacity was enough.

•••

You awoke a few hours later to a blinding light in your living room, sun piercing your swollen eyes making you cover them with your palms, a groan slipping past your lips at the heavy weight of your eyelids protesting your consciousness. 

Rubbing them to hopefully soothe the feeling, you pulled your hands away from your face, grasping the blanket on top of you in confusion. 

Dropping your head back down onto the couch, your mind raced with flashbacks from last night. The way he had screamed at you when you’d reached for his phone when it wouldn’t stop ringing because of that fucking girl, how it had turned into a huge argument that ended in you breaking up with him, collapsing in tears as soon as he left. 

You felt dizzy at the memory, the nearly two hour long argument draining you mentally, emotionally, and physically. 

You remembered calling Namjoon, him coming over-

Namjoon. Where was he?

Opening your eyes again, you tried to sit up, scooting your butt back on the couch to straighten your spine. It cracked as you did so, causing you to groan lightly as you turned your neck, sleepily looking around your living room. 

Finding your cell phone on the coffee table, you reached your arm over to retrieve it, looking at the bright screen with squinted eyes. 

Bypassing the rest of your notifications, you read the timestamp, concluding with a sigh that Namjoon had most likely left last night and already departed for work.

Standing up off of the couch, blanket still draped over your shoulders, you shuffled to your bedroom, plopping yourself down on your bed face down with a grunt. 

You couldn’t help the way your mind started spinning with the events of the last few months, the spiral and eventual downfall of your relationship. 

Was he the love of your life? Probably not. But fuck, you’d devoted time and emotion to him, you’d defended him to your family and friends and made yourself look like an ass while doing so over him, and you still weren’t enough. You weren’t enough.

Silent tears began soaking the pillow below you, your sniffles filling the room as you covered your face with the blanket, trapping yourself in the darkness beneath the tent of fabric. 

Finally, the fresh tears stopped falling, your bedroom once again encased in silence as you shut your sore eyes, hoping for some sleep to distract yourself for a bit.

Just as you were about to plunge into sleep, you startled awake at the sudden feeling of a hand on your shoulder before settling at the familiar warmth and size of the palm. Namjoon. Your gentle, goofy, over-sized best friend.

“Hello?” He called to you, tugging at the blanket again to which you released your grip, allowing him to see the wet trails down your reddened cheeks as you pouted up at him.

The devastated look on his face made you feel even worse, never liking to see Namjoon with such a glum expression.

His dimpled smile belonged on his face, the gentle scrunch of his nose when he laughed at something making him look not too far off from when you used to make him laugh in elementary school. 

Seeing Namjoon sad was always a trigger to you, and with your current mental state, it was no exception. You couldn’t hold back the choked sob that came out of your mouth, Namjoon instantly sitting back against the headboard and welcoming you into his side as you crawled to him. 

“Oh, love.” He frowned, hand trailing up and down your spine to coax your cries. 

“It hurts, Joon.” You whimpered, the man soothing your hair back with a frown.

“I know. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” He said softly, not knowing what other words to say. 

Honestly, he was fucking furious at him. Furious for playing with your heart like that. But he needed to be here for you, present to make sure you were coping healthily. 

“I thought you left for work.” You whispered, Namjoon humming softly in response.

“Mm, no, I called out. I just went to go pick up some coffee.” He explained, gesturing over to your bureau where two to-go cups of coffee sat side by side. 

“Why’d you call-”

“Because you need me and I’m not going to leave you. Plus, I woke up late today anyway. There was no time for me to go back home and get dressed then get there.” 

“You didn’t have to call out for me, Joon.”

“Love, I wanted to. I promise.” He said, causing you to sigh against him. 

“Thank you.” You mumbled, not knowing quite what you did to deserve such a selfless person in your life. 

When it came to absolute sweethearts, Namjoon took the cake.

“Plus, now I can spend my day with my favorite person. Who’d give that up?” He squeezed your shoulder, raising his eyebrows when you stirred in your position.

His words caused you to pick your head up off of him, Namjoon ignoring the daggers you sent him while he smoothed your fuzzy bedhead down with his palm. 

“You wanted to spend your day with a crying broken me? Really?” You practically scoffed, Namjoon squeezing your shoulder in response. 

“Hey, crying you is still you. You’ll always be my favorite person.” He defended himself, you shaking your head at him with a small smile. 

Laying back down against him, he latched an arm around your waist, securing you in his hold and making you exhale a bit of the tension in your body. 

“Wanna watch something?” He looked from the blank television back to you snuggled against his side, your nod causing his arm to reach over the bureau to grab the remote. 

“The usual?” He wondered, beginning to type the letters into the search bar when you nodded once again. 

Setting the remote down as the Looney Tunes introduction music played from the speaker, both your and Namjoon’s eyes glued to the screen as you lost yourselves in the nostalgia it provided. 

It brought you back to simpler times, when you were in fifth grade having your after school snack at Namjoon’s house, fruit that his mother had cut up for the two of you. 

It brought you back to simpler times when stupid men hadn’t wormed their way into your heart, only to reject you once they had you. 

Being brought back to earth by the man beside you with his hand trailing through your hair, you closed your eyes, thanking him in your head for always knowing what you needed. 

You knew you’d be okay eventually. Namjoon wouldn’t let you fail.

He never had.

[sehunniepotwrites]

when the ball drops, our hearts stop | mk.l

gif created by @nctsworld​ 

SYNOPSIS ☆ In which being dragged and ditched at a New Year’s Eve gala with your so-called enemy doesn’t end as badly as you thought it would. 

GENRE ☆ enemies-to-lovers!au, fluff, suggestive PAIRING ☆ mark lee x (f) reader WORD COUNT ☆ 2666 WARNINGS ☆ suggestive content ahead!! dirty dancing, neck kisses, alcohol consumption, mentions of cheating, cursing

PLAYLIST ☆ new year’s day - taylor swift

“What are you doing on New Year’s Eve?” had to be the number one question that was sent your way and unlike last year, you didn’t have an answer. Finding your lack of plans to celebrate the upcoming year with a bang, your best friend Wendy decided to drag you to the great outdoors. 

And by the great outdoors, she meant the biggest New Year’s Gala in the city. So there you were, in the grandest hotel in the heart of the city, downed in a glittery silver power suit that hugged your body in just the right way. A matching belt wrapped around to cinch your waist and the low cut of your blazer and lack of undershirt only accentuated the curves you usually preferred hiding. Hair curled up and face painted with the most flattering colors for your skin tone, you were rocking and ready to go.

The gala was packed with people your age and older with a mix of top forty music blaring from the loudspeakers. Everyone was dressed to the nines, wearing suits and dresses that went with the gold and silver theme. Bodies were pressed against each other on the dance floor and you were sure Wendy and her boyfriend Johnny were in that crowd as well. They were always the type to be caught up in all the fun— you, not so much, not since your breakup with your ex that occurred five months ago anyway.

You wanted to stray away from the party scene since it was your ex’s scene as well but fuck it, it was New Year’s Eve and you deserved to have fun. Your definition of fun included an obscene amount of alcohol, courtesy of Son Wendy and the credit card she slipped into the palm of your hand before making her way to the dance floor.

Of course, you promised that you would chat and get to know some people, maybe find someone to share a New Year’s kiss with but it was all a lie. You just wanted your free drinks and the loneliness haunting your mind to fade away.

Three Long Island Iced Teas and a bit way past tipsy into your night, a person pushed their way next to you at the bar, their body pressing against your side as they ordered a drink. You couldn’t see them, your hair creating a curtain and blocking them from view but you felt their eyes on you. It wasn’t until you leaned forward and took another sip of your drink that the person talked to you, immediately recognizing your face.

They called your name a bit cockily and you flinched at the sound, sober enough to pinpoint the exact person next to you but drunk enough to engage in a conversation with him. Swiveling your barstool to face him, you shot him a curt smile, lifting your drink up from the bar in greeting. “Mark,” you nodded as you drank him in. 

“Yo.”

As much as you hated to admit it, Mark Lee was handsome. His hair had been dyed a shade of blond and was styled in a way that made your heart unwillingly skip a beat. His grey velvet suit clung onto his body oh-so-well and the black tie that contrasted against the bright white of his shirt looked almost too tempting, the drunken state of your mind was urging you to pull it so he could step closer to you.

What did people say? Drunken thoughts, sober words? Yeah, fuck that.

“Johnny invited you?” you questioned as you sucked on the straw of your drink. You watched as his eyes flickered from your eyes to your lips for a fraction of a second, his lips curving into the smirk you wanted to punch off his face. Or kiss. 

“Yeah, should’ve figured I would see you when John invited me. You and Wendy are like a packaged deal, you know?” he replied as the bartender dropped off his drink. This time, your gaze was glued to his mouth as he took a swig of his drink, eyes slightly widening as his tongue peeked out before he downed the liquid courage. 

Coughing out of embarrassment, you looked away before Mark could catch you eyeing his seemingly delectable mouth. 

“You look like the mirrorball that’s about to drop,” he commented on your fit of the night. Glancing down at your suit, you frowned. It didn’t look that bad, did it?

When you shifted in your seat yet again, it sent your head spinning for a second, leaving you to grasp against Mark’s toned arm for balance. “I feel like one too,” you threw back. “Is the room spinning?”

“Shit, dude, how much did you drink?” His voice dropped lower in slight concern.

You hold up three fingers before blinking. No, it was four. You raised another finger. 

“All of them iced teas?” 

“Yup!”

He cursed “Where’s your asshole of a boyfriend? Don’t see him around anywhere— doesn’t he know it’s not safe to leave their girl alone at the bar?” Mark pushed, suddenly worried about your safety. He asked if anyone had hit on you yet and let out a sigh of relief when you reiterated that no one had bothered you. Despite the insult thrown your ex’s way, you remembered how considerate the guy was. The only real reason you hated Mark was due to the rivalry he held with your ex-boyfriend.

“I dunno,” you shrugged, shoulders raising and the material of your blazer shifting. Mark coughed, eyes quickly darting away so they wouldn’t land on the deep cut into your cleavage. “Probably sucking face with the bitch he left me for.”

Another long swig of your iced tea and suddenly, the drink was gone with only ice in the glass. You pointed a finger at his face, “Don’t cheat, folks. It’ll wreck a person.”

“Fuck,” Mark muttered under his breath, now fuming with anger that someone would cheat on a girl like you. It only grew when he realized your best friends had left you at the bar alone. He was going to rip their heads off later— how irresponsible of them. 

“Maybe that’s enough drinking for you today,” he told you, wanting to cut you off so you could sober up. He waved a hand in the air to call the bartender over to request two glasses of water, which was immediately prepared for you.

“Drink up,” Mark commanded, holding the straw to your lips. 

You thanked him with a lazy smile before drinking away, sighing at the refreshing feeling of the cold water running down your throat. He held the drink for you in his hands as you continued to work on the glass, only setting it down after you finished it. 

“Thanks,” you whispered, touching your forehead to his shoulder. He felt comfortable and you didn’t want to move as you breathed in the addicting scent of his cologne. You always preferred Mark’s fresh cologne over your ex’s overwhelmingly woody scent. It was consoling and safe and nice and—

“Hey, why don’t we move you to a booth? You’ll be more comfortable there,” Mark softly suggested.

“But what if I want to dance for once?” you whined.

“Let’s get you to sober up a bit more and then I can take you dancing, how ‘bout that?” His breath hit your ear and you laughed at the cold sensation before nodding. A flush that had nothing to do with the alcohol you consumed took over your face as the man you said you hated wrapped a supporting arm around your waist.

An hour later, your drunken state was fading as was the loneliness you were dreading. Mark Lee made an excellent company; he wasn’t at all what your ex painted him out to be. He was kind, caring, and endearingly sweet with the prettiest pair of eyes to match. The way his body wiggled to match his overflowing giggles brought the brightest smile to your lips, something you hadn’t experienced in quite some time. 

The time spent with him in the small booth rekindled the crush you harbored for him before you met your sad excuse of an ex, heart fluttering against your chest.

“Hey,” he leaned over the table, his face so close to yours. “You wanna move closer to the screen so we can see the ball drop clearly? It’s forty to midnight. We can dance, too.”

Your eyes curled up in excitement as you agreed, easily slipping your hand in his like you had done it a million times before. The feeling of his larger hand wrapped around yours sent you into a high that you couldn’t really describe. All you knew was that you didn’t want him to let go and thank god he didn’t.

Mark only held you tighter as you arrived on the dance floor with a clear view of the screen. The bass thumped as he tentatively quirked a brow, silently asking you to dance. You replied by draping your arms over the slopes of his shoulder, your fingertips playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. Tugging you closer at the waist, Mark shot you another look to see if you were okay. The tightening grip around his neck was enough of an answer for him. 

You shivered as his hands ran up and down the sides of your body, his touch almost burning through your glittered suit. When Mark least expected it, you turned around in his hold, pressing your backside against his front. A groan slipped out of his lips before his head dropped against your shoulder, his moist lips ghosting against the exposed skin of your neck. You reached back to hold his head in place as your body grinded into his.

The hand holding your waist tightened at your ministrations, squeezing you in a way that drove you crazy and the pair of lips that left a cautious kiss drove you crazier. The moan you let out and the way your free hand depressed against the one placed on your side was all the confirmation Mark needed to continue the trail of kisses he planned on leaving over the expanse of your neck. You enjoyed the feeling of his lips on your skin so much, your head rolled back and your eyes fluttered to a pleasured close as he nipped at your skin. 

The next half hour was spent with you encaged in Mark’s hold and you weren’t ashamed to say that you enjoyed every minute of it. When catching eyes with Wendy and Johnny across the dance floor, you laughed as your best friend wiggled her brows at you and shot a thumbs up your way. It was then, you realized, that it was their plan to get you two together all along.

Your friends had always mentioned you would get along great, the only thing stopping you was the blasted and unnecessary rivalry that blossomed between Mark and your ex. Now that the terrible excuse of a person was out of your life, there was room for a new man and you found yourself not hating the idea of Mark being the next keeper of your heart.

Five minutes to midnight, you turned around in his hold and smiled up at him. He returned the look with a soft grin of his own. 

“You’re not as bad as I thought you were, Mark Lee.”

“Took you long enough to notice,” he chuckled lowly, the sound sending a warm feeling to the pit of your stomach. “I never thought of you as bad, you know?”

“Is that so?” you countered, your hand freely running through his blond tresses. 

“Yeah, I always thought you were great.”

“Just great?” you teased, leaning a bit forward.

He groaned, “Ugh, dude, you know what I mean.”

“I don’t think I do, dude,” you pushed further, leaving him to touch his head against your shoulder again. You were starting to think that he loved to do it. 

“I always thought you were pretty special,” he whispered into your skin. 

Placing a kiss on the top of his head, you answered back, “I never wanted to admit it but I thought you were pretty special, too.”

“Glad to finally see that the feeling’s mutual,” he laughed before he returned the favor with a kiss to your jaw.

When the countdown from twenty began, Mark shifted both your bodies to face the screen as the people around you started to shout the numbers at the top of their lungs. Wendy and Johnny fought their way through the crowd to get to you and you briefly squeezed your best friend’s hand in greeting. Ready to leave the current year behind and welcome in the new one, you pressed your side into Mark’s before joining in on the countdown. 

You were shining, Mark noticed, like the mirrorball that was projected on the screen. It wasn’t like he mentioned earlier— it had nothing to do with the silver of the suit. It was just you and the way you shined so brightly as your voice blended with the others in the room. You were lost in the feeling and he loved the way you looked under the dim lights. 

He hoped he could see you in more nights to come, for more opportunities to hold you the way he did on the dance floor.

Mark Lee, who was in love with you longer than he could even remember, wanted your midnights and more. He wanted to hold on to the memories of keeping you close and to create new ones if you would let him. 

Hold onto the memories and they’ll hold onto you or so they said.

His eyes were stuck on you like glue as the crowd reached number ten.

Nine!

Mark’s hand wriggled around the ends of your blazer.

Eight!

His fingertips were hot against your bare skin.

Seven!

Mark tugged you closer to him, making you lose your grip on Wendy’s hand.

Six!

He found your hand reaching for his, fingers tangling together like the red string of fate.

Five!

His heart was beating a mile a minute at the feeling of your thumb rubbing against his skin.

Four!

You jerk your head towards him with glistening eyes and the widest smile. His eyes darted down to your colored lips before shifting back to meet your gaze.

“You wanna kiss me so bad,” you teased as your eyes followed his actions and ended up watching his tongue peek out to moisten his now dry lips.

Three!

“And what if I do?”

Two!

“Well, I’m not going to stop you,” came your flirty reply.

One! 

And when the ball dropped from the sky, your hearts stopped for a brief moment.

Cheers for the new year came from all around but Mark Lee didn’t care— all he cared about was your lips fiercely crashing against his. He spun your body round so it slotted so perfectly against his, much like two pieces of a puzzle coming together as a whole. 

The sensation of finally kissing your lips after secretly longing for you was more than satisfactory; it was addictive, more addictive than the drinks he consumed or any other tempting substance that existed in the world. Mark Lee was enthusiastically devoted to kissing you and the idea of ceasing never crossed his mind.

The only reason he did was for you to catch a breath. His eagerness never faltered, his lips running down to your jaw and the sides of your neck. He pecked your temple and forehead as you giggled at his over-the-top display of affection and it was music to his ears.

Pulling you flush into his chest, he whispered a late greeting into your ear, “Happy New Year.”

With your hands resting against his pecs, you glanced up at him with a charming smile, making his heart drop for the second time in the new year. 

“A happy new year indeed.”

author’s note ☆ surprise! happy new year, everyone! (and happy 500+ followers to me!) i coughed this out in like five hours so it’s unedited and not my best work, but i wanted to release something in time for the new year! wishing you the best 2021!! 

this was originally a request and i finally filled it!! ✨

[mochegato]

I Can’t Fight This Feeling

Chapter 2

Chapter 1

This was supposed to be an easy job, the last thing he had to do before Talia would think he was ready and let him go on his own path.  Trail the heroes back to the Guardian, steal his miraculous, wait until the heroes detransform, steal their miraculous.  Lure the villain out and steal his miraculous.  Child’s play. He didn’t need years of training for this.  

But then they were kids.  Kids who started the same age as him.  Kids who weren’t being protected as they risked their lives protecting everyone else.  Kids who actually cared about the people they worked with.  Kids who weren’t self-righteous, condescending, assholes. Kids who deserved to have good lives. But they were kids who were sacrificing their lives for this fight and he could help with that.  

Once he finished the mission, they could have their lives back.  He takes their miraculous, tracks down Hawkmoth and takes his miraculous, and everything goes back to normal for them.  Their lives can go back to normal, like none of this even happened.  He just needed to track down Hawkmoth, but that shouldn’t be too difficult.  He didn’t know what the heroes had tried already, but they were civilians.  

Everything he found out about Ladybug, or rather Marinette Dupain-Cheng, indicated that she had no detective training.  He had been trained by the World’s Greatest Detective and the League of Assassins.  Even if the butterflies were impossible to track, he should be able to find something that would lead him to the villain.  Then he takes that asshole’s miraculous, and the heroes, more specifically Marinette, could have her childhood back, what’s left of it anyway.

He just needed to get started and since he knew Marinette’s identity, that made her the weak link, so he’d start with her.  He’d been hoping he could track her to the Guardian, but she hadn’t gone to him.  Probably because knew she was being tailed.  She hadn’t done anything definitive to show it, she was too good for that, so if he didn’t know the signs, he would have missed it.  But he did know the signs, so he hadn’t missed them.

He could see the way her shoulders would tense up when he was watching her soothe to one of her classmates when they were panicking. He could see it in the way her eyes lingered around the playground just a little longer than was normal when she was babysitting.  He could see it in the forced even breaths when she was feeding strays.  He could see it in the way she would be in a design trance, focused on sketching, her eyes bright, and she would suddenly snap her head up, snap her book closed and head home.  He could see it in the way her smile suddenly strained when she was helping a stranger.

After another few weeks of trailing her, he had finally decided it was time to take her miraculous.  Instead of trailing her to the Guardian then take her miraculous, he’d take her miraculous and trail Chat Noir to the guardian.  He was the second in command, therefore he was the most likely to approach the Guardian with the information and come up with a plan. Whatever plan they came up with didn’t matter, as soon as he knew where the Guardian was, it was over.

Now, he just had to come up with the perfect time to take it, without hurting her too much in the process, which was going to be a challenge no matter when he did it.  There was no way she would just let him take them and while he could definitely overpower Marinette, he was hoping to do it with as little violence to her as possible.  Everything he’d observed so far about her told him she would likely already feel like she failed once he took them, he definitely would have.  Hopefully she reacted better to it than he would have, because back then, when he worked with Bruce, when he had a home, or thought he did, he would have gone into a deep depression.  He already knew it was going to happen, but he didn’t want to make it worse. She didn’t deserve that.  She didn’t deserve any of this.

The easiest way seemed to be to knock her out as painlessly as possible.  So here he was, following her, hanging back more than a respectable distance so he wouldn’t alert her to his presence and waiting for the perfect opportunity to isolate her and use the tranquilizer dart in his pocket.  And that would have been the way things went except it seems fate had a change of plans, in a way that only a crowbar to the side of the head could do.  This time it wasn’t a clown wielding the crowbar, but the effects were just as devastating.

There was a somewhat sheltered part of the park Marinette was walking through, trees on either side of a narrow walkway, shielding the area from prying eyes.  If she kept the direction she was going, she’d walk right through it, and that was where he’d strike.  He gripped the dart tighter in his pocket, prepping himself for what he was about to do to her.  He’d just picked up his pace when someone burst through an apartment building wall. Or rather, something did.  

An akuma calling himself the Shusher jumped at the kids in the park, wielding a crowbar of all things, to silence all of Paris. Each hit stole a bit of volume, until it stole their life, which to Jason’s horror, he demonstrated on Marinette. She’d acted immediately, jumping in front of the kids, giving them time to run, drawing him away from the direction they ran.  She’d dodged well for the first few swings, but after that, she’d grabbed his arm and kicked his kidney.  If the man hadn’t been an akuma, Jason was positive he’d be on the floor, but with the magical reinforcement, the akuma didn’t even flinch.  Instead, he swung hard, and with the close proximity, she didn’t have the room to dodge this time.

Jason froze at the first swing.  Why did it have to be a crowbar?  He couldn’t get his body to move.  He couldn’t react.  He couldn’t help.  And he couldn’t tear his eyes away.  The first hit knocked him out of his stupor.  The sight was horrifying.  His body finally moved, but slower than normal.  It didn’t seem to respond to him like it usually did.  He didn’t reach them until Marinette was already on the ground, no longer breathing.

He watched the blood seep out from under her until it had saturated the ground around her.  A sickeningly satisfied smile spread across the akuma’s face as he examined Jason to see what he would do.  Jason looked to the side toward the sheltered part of the park and back to the akuma. He pulled his hood over his head until the only part of him that could be seen was his glowing green eyes.

“Game on, mother fucker,” Jason growled as he sprung at the akuma, catching him around the waist and rolling toward the shielded section of the park.  He let the akuma attack him, backing him up until they were fully shielded on all sides by the trees.  Once he was sure nobody could see them and no cameras could record them, he leaped up and attacked the akuma with a volley of kicks and punches that would have left any normal human dead and unrecognizable within seconds.

He continued to attack the akuma until he heard the miraculous team arrive.  He kept the akuma distracted while Marinette’s team found her body and took a minute to mourn.  When they approached with a new found determination, he backed into the trees, effectively disappearing from the scene.  The akuma switched targets quickly, more interested in taking the miraculous than continuing a pointless fight with him.  Jason watched the akuma jump away and the team follow him.

The fight was long and messy without their leader there to guide them and them emotionally thrown off by her death, but Jason kept a close eye on the news coverage of it in case he had to step in. Every fiber in his being was pushing him to join the fight and tear the bastard to pieces, slowly and in the most painful ways possible.  But he couldn’t do that.  If he did, Talia would know what he did, that he intentionally betrayed them.  He wouldn’t last the week, let alone Marinette.

And regardless of the outcome of the fight with the heroes, the man wouldn’t survive the week anyway.  Jason was going to make sure of it.  That thought was the only one running through his head as he watched Marinette’s lifeless body strewn out on the ground, her arms at odd angles, the bruises starting to form, the spots where the crowbar hit starting to puff up.  He could no longer make out the shape of her face.  Her eyes, which had always been so bright and hopeful and passionate, were now lifeless and dull.  

It stole his breath away.  He felt a sharp pain in his chest that wouldn’t go away, worse than if he would have taken a hit to the chest from the crowbar.  Which is exactly what should have happened.  He had training.  He had experience.  He should have been the one to jump into the fight, not Marinette.  She didn’t have any of that and she jumped in to save those kids.  She knew she wouldn’t be able to hold him off for long and she still did it.  

And he wanted to be angry or surprised but he wasn’t either.  Because he’d done his research.  He’d been observing her for over a month now in and out of the suit.  That’s just who she was.  That’s who he was supposed to hurt.  God, the idea of being the cause for her eyes to dull over hurt.  But he kind of was, wasn’t he.  And his plan, if he went through with it, would do it all over again.

After an eternity, a wave of pink and red ladybugs swept through the area, returning the surrounding buildings to normal. Marinette gasped back to life. She jolted up to sitting only to slump immediately after.  She took a few shuttering breaths before reaching up to feel her ears.  “No, no, no, no,” she started panicking and searched her surroundings.

“They’re gone,” Jason answered the unasked question.

She stared at him wide-eyed, fear lacing her eyes, quickly turning to a furious glare.  He held up his hands in surrender.  “It wasn’t me.  It was your friend so she could fight the akuma.”  She looked at him doubtfully, but nodded.  She was healed after all, so the akuma must have been defeated.  She kept her eyes on him and slowly urged her body to tense in preparation for whatever attack he had planned.

“Relax.  I’m not going to fight you, kid.  I’m not looking for a fight today… except maybe that guy with the crowbar,” he growled the last part of his sentence, his eyes wandering in the direction the fight had gone.

“No!  You can’t do that,” Marinette exclaimed loudly, almost lunging at him, but collapsing back down almost instantly from the shock of movement to her system.

“Are you serious, Goody Two Shoes?  He killed you.  He beat you until you stopped breathing.  He took your life from you with no remorse and you’re going to protect him?” Jason barked.

“It wasn’t him.”  Jason scoffed at her.  “I’m not saying he’s a good guy.  I don’t know him.  But, the akumas, they change a person, morph them, make them into someone they aren’t. It isn’t them.  And I don’t want anyone dead because of me.”  She met Jason’s glare with a determined one of her own for a few seconds before she looked away.  “And it’s Marinette, not Kid or Goody Two Shoes.”

Jason narrowed his eyes at her and pressed his lips together in frustration.  “Fine. I won’t kill him.  But you need to be careful because the League of Assassins is after your jewelry.  And stop telling strangers your name.”

Her eyes snapped back up to meet his.  “What is the League of Assassins?” she asked cautiously. “And like you didn’t know my name already.  You know it. Use it.”

“Fine,” he rolled his eyes.  “And you wouldn’t believe me about the League if I told you.” He shook his head lightly, but the serious expression on his face was enough to scare Marinette.

“Try me.”  Her voice held more confidence than she felt.  Like she was challenging him.

“It’s a league … comprised… of assassins.”

Marinette rolled her eyes and huffed out a long suffering breath.  He gave her a charming grin, maybe the first authentic, happy smile he’d given since before he died.  He looked in her eyes and suddenly turned away.  His smile faded to a frown.  “There's a timer on this peace.  They want the miraculous and they want them before you defeat Hawkmoth because they know they’ll have no way to track them once you’re not using them anymore.”

He looked back in her eyes.  “They'll send somebody else as soon as I leave here.  They’ll send more.”

“Someone better?” she chuckled mirthlessly.

Jason scoffed and gave her a roguish smile.  “Oh Pixie, there is no one better.”

Marinette actually laughed.  “Well then, I've already survived the best.  I'm sure I can survive the rest,” she said defiantly.  “And I told you to call me Marinette.”

Jason smiled proudly, but quickly shook it off.  As long as Hawkmoth was active, they were in danger, she was in danger and he wouldn’t be able to protect her.  The only way out of it was to become him.  “Not unless you're willing to kill them. They're not like me.  They won't walk away when they see who you are.  They'll keep coming until you kill them.”

She looked at him curiously.  “And who am I?  Who am I to you to make you stop?”

Jason looked away, his eyes unfocused for a moment before returning to her eyes.  “You're like me, like I used to be.  But better.  You're who I should have been, who I was supposed to be.”  His head whipped around to the sound of people calling her name. “Time’s up.  Good luck.”

“Wait…” she called after him.  She tried to get up and go after him, but he was already gone before she could ask more questions.

Two weeks later she received an email addressed to Pixie with a clear video shot through a window of Gabriel Agreste transforming into Hawkmoth.  A week later, she, Chat, and the rest of the team took him down, with video documentation of the whole thing and Officer Raincomprix as a witness.  Ultimately, once they knew who to go after, it was actually extremely easy to sneak in camouflaged and immobilize him.  They just needed that last piece of the puzzle.

The justice investigation was quick, as was the trial. Everyone involved was eager to get it over as quickly as possible, and with incontrovertible evidence against him, Gabriel didn’t have much of a defense to give anyway.  Waking up Adrien’s mother took a bit longer, but with the help of the monks in the temple, she made a full recovery.  Marinette’s memories of the previous three years, however never did.

Chapter 3

Tags:

@jasonette-july-event @jayjayspixiepop @aespades @how-to-function-properly

[emonaculate]

Kisses n Kick Flips

❥ AU: Highschool!AU

❥ Genre: Fluff/Comedy

❥ Rating: 16+ (Well anyone can read because there's no explicit content, I'm just saying 16 because Eren is gonna be 18)

❥ Pairing: Skater!Eren Yeager x Black!Reader

❥ Word Count: 2.4K

❥ Warnings Include: Puppy Love, Romance, Profanity, and Injuries

❥ Author Note: I wrote this shit because I'm depressed and in desperate need of tooth-rotting romance. Attack on Titan is somehow the best and worst thing that has happened to me in a long fucking time. Not to mention @eremiie and @erotisc gave me some inspiration to work with, so thank you guys! Anyways I hope this helps everyone who is sad over the newest chapter

"Armin you don't understand, she's the smartest person in this whole fucking school; there's no way I'm gonna catch her attention." Eren groaned slamming his head into their lunch table.

"I take personal offense to that; when I'm valedictorian..." Armin frowned not reacting to Eren's physical actions, meaning he was used to seeing it.

"Sorry. But you know what I mean; she's smart and I'm just..."

"A hot-headed dumbass?" Jean quipped, now interested in the conversation at hand.

"Haha. Fuck you, horse face." Eren snapped flipping his friend off.

"I'm just saying if you wanna catch Y/n's attention; you need to completely not be...." Jean looked Eren up and down grimacing as he gestured to his entire body. "Yourself."

"That's not that bad of an idea, Jeanboy." Connie butted in, leaning on the ash-brown boy's shoulder

Before Eren could retaliate, the lunch bell rang meaning it was time for his favorite class of the day, Physics. Without wasting any time, Eren grabbed his bookbag and sprinted out of the cafeteria leaving his friends behind. The excitement began to build through his body as he raced down the halls tightly clutching onto his bag, trying to beat the bell and the other kids walking around.

He made his way into the class extremely early and sat down eagerly, finally for the first time, he'd be able to sit right beside her. A happy smile spread across his face as he leaned back in his chair excitedly.

Damn it all, life was a never-ending cycle of depression and disappointment. All Eren ever knew was pain. He knew was being a tad bit dramatic but how come nothing ever went his way? All that running and dashing was for nothing, especially since Y/n showed up to class later than usual. The only good thing about the entire ordeal was, Y/n sat near the teacher's desk, meaning he could stare at her for as long as he wanted without it looking creepy.

"Yeager, what's the answer?" His teacher snapped, irritated that he was being ignored.

"Huh? Can you repeat the question?"

"As light from a star spreads out and weakens, do gaps form between the photons?" Mr. Shadis repeated, tapping his foot impatiently.

"Um... No?" Eren started having no idea what the hell to say.

"Incorrect. As usual." Shadis scoffed with a slight smirk, satisfied that he managed to crush and embarrass yet another student.

Eren looked down as his face heated up, now he looked like a moron in front of Y/n. Maybe Jean was right, being himself wasn't going to help anything. Or better yet, maybe he should just give up on crushing on someone so out of his league.

"Mr. Shadis, I don't mean to interrupt but actually, Eren is correct. Gaps do not form between photons as light spreads out. Light is made up of tiny fundamental bits called photons. A photon is a quantum object. As such, a photon acts a little like a particle and a little like a wave." Y/n explained looking at their teacher with a slight gleam in her eyes, silently daring him to correct her.

"Ah, Miss L/n. It's nice to see you join the conversation for once, of course, you join to protect your boyfriend."

"Well I couldn't just leave him hanging when he was in the right and knew what he was talking about, isn't that right Eren?"

The smile on the said male's face was entirely too big, he had died and gone straight to Heaven. All the misfortune he had experienced before meant nothing now that Y/n had acknowledged him. He had won at life.

"Um yeah exactly. I have to say, you explained it better than I could." He cleared his throat and looked directly at her, his heart pounding through his ears as she kept eye contact with him.

"Thanks but I just tend to over-explain things, so don't feel bad. Simplicity is nice sometimes."

"Okay that enough, anyways back to the lesson at hand." Shadis grumbled.

Eren waited for the bell to ring before he shot up and walked over to Y/n's seat, the tanned girl was still packing up her belongings. Now that he was close enough, Eren could smell the sweet aroma that radiated off of her body, strawberries, and coconut. Her long braids were pulled up into a half up half down style and her edges had been laid to perfection.

The male felt his palms grow sweaty as he continued to look at her, Jesus had she always been this beautiful? Y/n looked back up at him as her two-toned glossed lips morphed into a sickeningly sweet smile.

"Hi, Eren."

"Hey... um, thanks again for earlier."

"It's no trouble really, can't let Shadis bully his students right?"

"Yeah... yeah" Eren licked his lips and shoved his hands into his pockets now growing self-conscious about what he chose to wear to school.

A tight black wife-beater, grey and white flannel with ripped blue jeans, and finally black Air Forces. Granted it was usual for him, but he wasn't sure if his usual was something Y/n would even remotely be attracted to.

"So I was wondering if you wanted to hang out after school today.." He blurted after gathering all of his confidence.

Y/n's face looked shocked for a moment before she gave an apologetic smile looking away slightly; Eren felt his heart drop to his stomach instantly knowing whatever she was about to say was going to ruin his happy mood.

"Sorry. I can't-"

"Yeah, it's cool. Nevermind forget I asked." Eren walked off, not wanting to act like a dick in front of her.

He knew his temper wasn't exactly the best, but the last thing he wanted was to blow up on her of all people. That's why he was now at the park sitting on a table beside Armin who was doing homework, which really made no sense to Eren since Armin was the one who suggested going to the park in the first place.

"I was so close man. Like all she had to do was say yes."

"So let me get this straight, Y/n defended your dumbass in class and you still fumbled the ball? Wow, Yeager, you surprise me every day." Jean laughed as he watched Connie roll the blunt.

"Say something else and I swear I'm gonna beat the shit out of you. Say something else, I fucking dare you." Eren glared as he furrowed his eyebrows.

"Ayo calm down, don't be getting mad at grade-a asshole over here because of your shortcomings. Jean is a dick don't get me wrong but beating his ass won't help your situation." Connie tsked as he gazed up at Eren.

"Whatever. I'm gonna go skate." Eren stood up and grabbed his board, moving away from his friends.

Sometimes skating was the only thing that could get him to relax, well that and his mother's cookies. But currently, the older he got, the more skating seemed to help him cope with all the bullshit he dealt with on a daily. This skateboard has been with him for years, despite how rough he was with it, it managed to outlast all of the crazy stunts he'd pull.

Eren got a running start and jumped on his board enjoying the feeling of the wind blowing on his face; his eyes fluttered shut as the wind continued to tickle his face. A peaceful sigh escaped his lips as he shifted his body, concentrating on using his other senses.

He would often skate blindfolded, there was something about having the trust all of your other senses to not wind up hurting yourself or others. More than he'd like to admit, usually it would be him that got the short end of the stick.

"Watch out!" A familiar voice screeched causing Eren to snap his eyes open.

His eyes widened as he saw a young girl sitting right in the middle of his path, usually stopping would be no problem for Eren, unfortunately since his focus was thrown off. He continued to advance towards the girl, but in the last second decided to perform a rather high Ollie. Luckily he managed to maneuver his trick perfectly, however, due to the altitude of his jump, the male lost his footing and crashed into the concrete.

"Fuck!" He hissed in pain as he knew he tore skin.

"Oh my god! Are you okay? I'm so sorry." A female voice called out to him as he laid on the ground.

"Just fucking peachy," He sat up ready to finally blow up only to come face to face with Y/n. "Erm. I mean yeah it hurt but I'm fine."

"You're bleeding and it's my fault. I'm so sorry." She panicked as she inspected his face, her warm hands darting out to grab his face.

Suddenly all the pain disappeared from his body, he was on cloud nine again. Eating shit on concrete felt like a piece of cake now that she was here pampering him.

"It's no problem, Y/n. I've felt worse." He replied trying to ease her worries.

"I turn away for one moment and then Gabi just disappeared."

"Hey, it's okay. Y/n look at me, I'm fine." He chuckled and placed his larger hand over hers.

Y/n stared at him for a moment before averting her eyes, seeming to be flustered as she stood up. She shifted awkwardly and stumbled backward, much to Eren's confusion.

"Stay right there. I got some first aid stuff in my car. I'll be right back." She mumbled as she rushed away.

Eren watched her silently with a shit-eating grin on his face, despite his nose and lip bleeding profusely. He watched her baby blue skirt flow along with the over-sized white graphic t-shirt. When Y/n came back, she held tightly onto a little girl's hand and dropped the first-aid kit clumsily as she made eye-contact with Eren.

"Oh my gosh. I'm so sorry."

"Y/n, I never knew you were this uncoordinated." He hummed teasingly as she bent down to grab the kit.

"I'm usually not. It's just because-" She stopped herself and smiled at him. "Nevermind it's nothing."

She sat down in front of him and began to clean the cuts along with scrapes. Y/n bandaged them all up carefully whilst avoiding looking at the male who could nothing but stare at her. His turquoise eyes greedily soaked in the appearance of her face, after-all with how close she was, how could he not?

"And done...Now Gabi," Y/n smiled sweetly, backing away from him as she grabbed the little girl's hand again. "Apologize to Eren. He could have gotten hurt."

"Why should I care? I was there first. He almost messed me up and then I'd have to start all over with my chalk." Gabi sneered and crossed her arms.

"Gabi! Apologize now. Or I'll make sure Reiner, knows about your behavior recently." Y/n said sternly.

"Fine. I'm sorry. Sorry, that you got in my way." Gabi stuck her tongue out at Eren and blew a loud raspberry.

"That's it go stand by the car. Right now." Y/n snapped looking at the child.

"But-" Gabi started as her eyes widened, seeming to not be used to punishment from Y/n.

"No buts. Go. Now." Y/n demanded pointing at the car.

Gabi walked away grumbling to herself and Y/n looked back at Eren apologetically. He stared at her with a raised eyebrow and an amused grin.

"Charming kid."

"She usually isn't like this."

"Oh really? She seems like an angel." He sarcastically replied.

"I'm sorry Eren. Is there any way I can make it up to you?" She mumbled softly looking at him with her big brown eyes.

Eren stiffened up and silently began to recite the pledge of allegiance, there was no reason for how ridiculously attractive she looked when she said that little stupid phrase.

"Let me take you on a date." He blurted dreamily not realizing it had slipped out of his mouth.

"A date?" Y/n questioned curiously.

"Yes. A date, you and me." He responded despite his chest-beating heavily.

"...I don't know." She mumbled looking away from him.

"Y/n..." Eren stood up and looked down at her, cupping her face gently, adrenaline pumping through his veins. "I've had the biggest crush on you since sophomore year. I thought that it would just go away but no matter what I've always just thought about you. Despite the two other girls I've dated, I wanted you. I've never dared to ask you because you're clearly out of my league and I just-"

He was silenced by Y/n pressing her lips against his mouth and Eren was sure he felt his knees buckle, the taste of her vanilla lip-gloss was the tastiest thing he had consumed. He kissed back desperately not wanting the moment to end, his hands held her jaw a little tighter. Y/n broke the kiss first with a bashful smile.

"I like you Eren. I've liked you since middle school. I was just nervous because I thought you were out of my league."

"Bullshit, you're like an Earth goddess and I'm just a dumbass." He protested as his hands found their way to her hips.

"No, you're sweet, caring, friendly, and all-around a really good guy." She hummed wrapping her hands around his neck.

"Mm well, I guess I can say this shit was worth the wait." He leaned down their noses touching gently.

"Definitely," Y/n repeated before Eren captured her lips into another sweet kiss.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Okay, I need to go now." Y/n laughed as he peppered kisses down her shoulder.

"Mm then leave" Eren mumbled nipping at her skin softly.

"I would but you won't let me leave your lap." She retorted as she looked down at his hands that held tightly onto her waist.

"Then I guess you can't go." He grinned.

"Okay, you guys are starting to make me sick." Jean stood up, setting his controller down.

"Yeah me too, Armin why the fuck did you have to set them up." Connie mumbled as he painted his nails.

"What?" Eren paused his motions and looked at his blonde best friend, who was reading a book.

"You guys kept moping to me about liking each other and whenever I advised to just be upfront about your feelings, you guys just ignored me. What else was I supposed to do?" He questioned setting his book down, as it dawns on both Y/n and Eren; they had been manipulated.

"Dammit, Armin." Y/n mumbled despite the smile on her face.

Eren was definitely in Armin's debt forever after realizing he was the reason that Y/n was his girlfriend. The brunette smiled thinking of the perfect way to help his friend, and what better way could he repay him by setting him up with his crush as well?

[dancingintheraindreamingonday]

My loyalty can be bought - Chapter 7

Author’s note: The journey is almost over. Maybe two more chapters. Sometimes I want to write thousands of words but that would probably bore you. Thanks to everyone who reads my stories. It means the world to me. 

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6

„When was this picture taken?“ Bucky, Sam and Zemo, the golden trio, stand in Sharon Carter’s apartment looking at all her illegal paintings. But a certain framed picture got Bucky’s attention. On this picture was Sharon and you.  A cigarette was between your fingers and a bottle of Vodka was in the other hand. Your wedding ring wasn’t on your left ring-finger anymore. Instead you wore it as a necklace. You looked different. Your hair was darker than usual and you wore more make-up. If Bucky hadn’t memorize every feature of your body he wouldn’t have recognize you.

„Three years ago… I think… During that time (y/f/n) and I were pretty close but now not anymore. I think that’s a side effect when you are the vice-director of SHIELD. She doesn’t trust me anymore.“

Bucky didn’t know what shocked him most. You being vice-president of SHIELD or you not trusting Sharon anymore. After all, you and Sharon were really good friends. 

„She said my loyalty can be bought and that’s not a good character trait.“ Sharon continues talking as she pours herself a glas of whiskey.

Bucky jumps to his feet and pushes Sharon against the wall who drops the glas. „Bucky!“, Sam screams and stands right behind Bucky. „What the hell are you doing?“

„And did you sell your loyalty to the one who kidnapped (y/f/n)? Did you?“, Bucky shouts at her.

He knew it. Right from the beginning when they met Sharon after all those years. Something was off. She’s not innocent

Sharon doesn’t look at Bucky but instead at her mobile phone. Sam follows her gaze, unlocks the phone and finds a voice message of you just a day before the abduction: 

„Tell your little friends to stop following me. I don’t like being followed, Sharon. I know the identity of the power broker and I also know that SHIELD is infiltrated by HYDRA again. I’m neither blind nor naive. Why are you working with her, Sharon? I thought you hated Valentina. Why are you cooperating with her? I’m warning you. Leave them alone. Leave my family alone.“

The call ends. Your voice still hard and strong, echoing through Bucky’s mind. 

„Where the hell is she? If you want to live you better tell me.“

„She knew how this would end. (Y/f/n) played with fire and got burnt. You really think she’s still the same quirky and naive teenager who just lived for the love of a man. Wake up, Bucky. How do you think she got the job at SHIELD? You still trust her even thought she kept all the secrets.“ Sharon tries to free herself but Bucky’s grip is too strong. „Did she tell you that the first year of being a mother she wasn’t even with her child because of her depressions? She gave the kid to Tony and Pepper. Did you know that? Did she tell you how close she was with Clint Barton? Did she tell you about the huge argument she had with Steve and that they weren’t on speaking terms for 3 years? Did she tell you that she lived in Madripoor for months? And did she tell you that she was with Barton on their criminal missions? No, I bet not. She’s still acting like this weak woman around you but believe me. She’s not innocent.“ Sharon spats in Bucky’s face. 

„For the last time. Where is she?“ Not responding to Sharon's accusations.

„I’ll show you because she’s probably already dead. It was her or me and after all she was right about one thing: My loyalty can be bought.“ Sharon’s voice is filled with anger as she smiles at Bucky and Sam wickedly.

Sharon leads the way, a gun is pointed in her back. „If that’s a trap I’ll make sure you will regret the day you betrayed (y/f/n).“, Bucky whispers in her ear. 

After a while they walk into a dark building which is guarded with several soldiers with heavy guns. 

„They are with me. They wanna see the project.“

As they walk down the hall they see many doors with little windows. Bucky see other men and women in white hospital clothing laying on bed. 

„(Y/f/n) is our special guest. She’s in the last room.“

The last room has three more soldiers guarding the door. As they step aside and Bucky, Sharon, Sam and Zemo enter the room, Bucky’s heart drops. There you are. Unconscious and weak. Bucky pushes Sharon aside and walks directly to your bed. 

„Love?“, He caress your left cheek with his big hand. „Can you hear me? I need you to wake up. We have to get you out of here.“ He takes the syringe out of your arm and shakes you softly but you don’t respond. 

„I’ve brought them here as you wished.“, mumbles Sharon in her ear piece. 

The door opens again and soldiers run into the room to take their positions. „What a great day. Killing the winter soldier, the falcon and the vice-director of SHIELD. And this guy.“ A woman with black hair and big silver earrings walks into the room, looking from Bucky, to Sam, to you and to Zemo. „Good work, Carter. Well done.“, she pats Sharon on her shoulder. „You are Ms. De Fontaine. You were friends with Steve. How can you betray his legacy?“, Sam asks disgusted by her betrayal. „The world changes, Mr. Wilson. So does people and people’s goals.“ 

As Sharon and Valentina De Fontaine walk out of this room, Bucky and Sam, and even Zemo make themselves ready to fight. 

„Have fun, boys.“, Valentina chimes as the the door closed. 

15 soldiers versus 3 men. Bucky attacks first and then there was utter chaos. Punches, knife stabs and kicks. All you can hear are bones cracking, cries and thuds. Sam is pressed against the wall with no option to escape. „Any last words?“ , asks the soldier who points a gun at Sam. But before Sam could do anything the soldier collapses on the floor with a bullet in his left temple. Sam turns to his right. There is you. You lean against the wall with shaking legs. The gun is still in your hands as you whisper „Asshole“. While Sam and Zemo take the end of this fight as a small break to catch breath, Bucky rushes to you. He hugs you and kisses you dirty hair. „We need to get out of here.“ He grabs your hand as you all escape Madripoor. 

Later on the plane, Bucky looks at you intensively. „Why didn’t you tell me?“

You look at him confusion written on your face. „Tell you about what?“

„About everything. You and SHIELD; You and Steve and you and Barton. I didn’t know you were a couple.“ The last part hurts Bucky the most. He feels this green monster inside him roaring out of jealousy.

„Clint and I were never a couple. Maybe a couple of idiots and friends. But there was never more between us. Clint and I lost so much but we didn’t lose the love we had for those who we lost. At that time we were in so much pain and grieve. No, a romantic relationship was something both of us never wanted- not with each other or with anyone else.“, you reassure Bucky. He doesn’t show it but Bucky is relieved and happy. 

„There is still so much that I don’t know about you.“

„James, we broke up after you came back, remember? And people don’t really talk with their ex-partners.“

„Breaking up with you was the worst mistake I’ve ever made.“, whispers Bucky just for you to hear it. 

„It’s okay, James. I’m okay. We changed. We both did. You changed. I changed. Heck, our whole family and the whole universe changed. And love does the same too.“

„Mine didn’t.“, says Bucky. „My feelings for you never changed. I still love you.“

You smile at Bucky for a while, not reacting to his love confession immediately.

You lean your head against the cold window of the plane and close your eyes. You spoke so softly that Bucky almost missed it you say. „I’ll always love you.“

Chapter 8

Author’s note at the end: Sorry, for making Sharon kinda bad. I love the Sharon in the movies and I love the actress, so it’s definitely nothing personal. Did you notice how much my you-character changed? A few chapters ago in Bucharest she didn't notice that she and Bucky were being followed but now she's more aware of her surrounding. ;)

@inlovewith3 @jackiehollanderr @homesicam@dreamydreamerwriting @losers-club6 @gengen64@agentsofsheilds @crimson-darling @akkinda10 @xemine@bubblegumholland @chipilerendi @iamasimpingh0e @bbmommy0902 @madddiiee26 @teenagedreams-bucky @aya-fay @idontknowwhatthisisfam @w-wolfhxrd @useless-creature-213  @angywritesstuff @supernaturalcat7 @harrys-stan @geek-and-proud @pastel-boy-sungjae @austynparksandpizza @maxsaturdayhatesnarwhals @teenagedreams-bucky

[softcallofdutyimagines]

More Then a Woman | Frank Woods x Fem!Reader | Chapter 7 - Finale

Summary:

It all comes down to this. Will Frank be able to make things right?

Tags: Slow burn, fluff, age difference, angst

Tag requests: @direwolfspostsrandomshit

Chpt 1 | Chpt 2 | Chpt 3 | Chpt 4 | Chpt 5 | Chpt 6 Warnings: strong language, age difference, and references to depression like symptoms and past childhood trauma

Another hour passes. Another beer down.

The television drones on in the background while he stares right through it. Why is he even watching this? He hates TV.

He should be training today, maybe the gym or the firing range, but… He just doesn’t feel like it.

His stomach growls. He looks at the clock. He should get something to eat, but… He doesn’t feel like that either.

At last the cramping moves him to action, and sluggishly he gets up and wanders to the kitchen. He grabs his go-to as of late, a bag of chocolate chips for baking. His diet’s been such shit lately, and he knows it’s not helping. He hates that. And he loves it. Because right now he’ll do anything just to get even a flicker of feeling.

Good. Bad. He doesn’t care.

He just wants to feel.

It’s been a couple weeks since he last saw you, out back behind the CIA gym, and he’s been numb ever since. Mason’s been trying to bring him out of it all this time.

‘You did the right thing’, he says. ‘She’s just a kid, she doesn’t know what she’s doing’, and then, ‘If anything, you did her a favor. She doesn’t really want to get caught up like that with an old guy, right?’, he laughs.

He eats another handful of chocolate and looks down at himself. ‘She doesn’t want to...’ Is he really that repulsive? He runs a hand over his belly. It’s been feeling more rounded than usual.

Fuck.

For a moment, that same old burning, consuming flare of fury he’s so used to getting rises up. He grips the plastic bag so tightly, his knuckles turn white.

His discipline has been getting looser and his belt has been getting tighter, the polar fucking opposite of how things should be. His nostrils flare and lips draw back to reveal tightly clenched teeth, like a dog readying for an attack. Every muscle in his body tenses as he bores holes into nothing in particular. He starts to cock his arm back.

Throwing something will help him feel better.

Right?

He aims for the wall and winds up for an all star pitch, and then…

and then…

He can’t even muster the motivation for that.

As quickly as it came, the anger leaves, and as he lets out the breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding, his entire body relaxes once more. What the fuck is wrong with him anyway?

What, mommy and daddy didn’t love him enough, so now he throws little tantrums whenever the fuck he feels like it? He mocks himself, feeling almost ashamed suddenly of all his outbursts, but when he thinks about it…

Yeah.

Maybe that...

He sighs, suddenly feeling extremely defeated and very alone. Maybe he shouldn't be surprised you left him. Everyone else who ever loved him did.

Woods drops the bag of chocolate from his limply hanging arm and watches the pieces scatter and roll all over the floor.

Whatever. He’ll eat something else.

This is how it’s been for weeks and this how it’ll be for the foreseeable future. He lazes around, completely numb to the outside world, grazing his pantry and doing anything to distract himself from his thoughts. If only any of it worked. Then at night he’ll lay awake well past midnight, until either regular exhaustion or exertion from shedding tears sends him to sleep.

But it wasn’t always like this.

After the first few days since he chased you off, he tried to make up for it.

He called.

He tried to see you at work.

He even sent you some fucking flowers and a letter.

Not a word back.

Well, aside from the ‘Get the fuck out of here, and don’t you fucking dare come back’ he got when he came to your office. After that one…

He hasn’t cried that hard over a woman in… Well… Ever.

And that’s what really gets to him, isn’t it? Just a woman. You’re just a fucking woman. There’s billions of others out there… And yet, he can’t manage to land even one, can he?

This message plays back in his mind over, and over, and over again.

Even now, as a slow stream of tears leak from his eyes to his pillowcase. He looks over just a few inches away to the empty half of his bed. Frank sniffs and swipes at his nose before gently plopping his hand on the pillow beside his. The fabric is icy cold against his skin.

You know, Alex told him once that he’ll lay in his wife's spot on the bed to warm up the sheets for her at night.

She hates the cold, and Alaskan nights are no joke. Would you like that? He wonders. He heard once that women are always fucking cold. He’d warm up your sheets for you, you know. Or maybe, you’d like a blanket? He’d get you one. A nice one! Fresh and new, not any of the tattered shit he keeps in his linen closet.

Or, maybe, you’d like it more if he just… Held you? He could keep you warm all by himself if you wanted him to. Would you even like him to?

Would that make you happy?

Would he make you happy?

A fresh round of tears breaks over him.

He closes his eyes and curls in on himself as he lets the sobs take over him. Damn it, he promised himself he wouldn’t do this again… He thinks about you far too much. All the time, really. And where does it get him? Somewhere about like he is now, he supposes.

He stews in his own wretchedness like this for quite some time, and it’s not until a few days later that anything changes.

Mason pounds on the door of the dingy little house, “Frank?”, he calls, “Frank, open up you bastard, I know you’re in there!”

Truthfully, he’s only in town on some work related business, but… He can’t just stand by and let his friend suffer like this.

So, he waits and waits, and pounds and pounds until he's sure the door is about to come off the hinges. Mason cups his hands to the crack of the door, shouting into it as loud as he dare, “I’m not leaving until you come out here asshole!”

At last, a quiet voice comes from the other side, “What do you want?”

For a moment, Mason is rather dumbfounded. Never before has he ever heard his friend sound so soulless. So… broken. He shakes his head, and pulls himself out of it, “Frank will you open up? I’m here to check on you man!”

Woods sighs, “Don’t waste your time”, the voice trails off as though he’s walking away.

“Hey!”, Mason pounds on the door again, “Son of a bitch, get back here!”

The door swings open abruptly, and Mason nearly falls over as the door’s taken out from him. He stumbles a moment, then catches himself as he stands up straight.

Mason locks eyes with his old friend, and Woods says nothing. Alex takes in the sight of him. His stubble is out of control, the bags under his eyes are dark and purple, and the undershirt he’s wearing could’ve used a wash about a week ago.

“Jesus…You look like shit”

“Thanks”, Woods replies flatly, “Now go away”

He makes to close the door, but Mason stops him, “Wait wait wait… Ok, I’m sorry, I just… Wow, um… Can I come in at least? Let’s talk about this”, Alex motions to Woods in his entirety.

“Do I have a choice?”

Mason pushes the door all the way open, letting himself in and taking his friend by the shoulders as he leads him further into the house, “No, we’re having a fucking intervention”

He leads him to the living room and clears a pile of clothes and trash off the cushions so they can sit down. Alex commands his friend to take a seat, then follows suit. Once they’re both settled, Mason grows serious but maintains a cautious, sympathetic veneer.

Mason rubs his hands together and gives it to him straight, “Look, I know you feel like you fucked up. I know you’re feeling lonely and it’s got you in the dumps. But… Come on man, look what’s been going on with you!”, He gestures to the living space around them.

Dirty laundry and neglected trash sit in little piles all around in a room that smells of old must with a faint, queasy scent of booze. “This is no way to live, buddy!”

Frank says nothing. Instead, he sits and listens without even attempting to make eye contact, like a child receiving a tiresome lecture.

Alex grits his teeth and tries to keep his temper in check. “So… What I’m trying to say is…. Maybe you need to get out of here, you know? Go to a game, take a vacation, something!”, he scoots a bit closer, taking on a more personal tone with his old friend, “I don’t want to see you destroy yourself like this Frank…”

Woods recoils at that, snapping to life as though he’d just now entered the conversation, “I’m not! I just… I need some time to get over this, alright!”

Mason casts an exaggeratedly doubtful look at the other man. Frank jumps to defend himself once more, but Alex cuts him off, “Ok ok! How about this, let’s you and me go out for a little bit huh? Have some beers, some guy time! I just want you to get out of this place for a little while, is that so bad?”

Frank grumbles a bit, but somewhere in there is an agreement. Mason cheers, "That's the spirit!", and drags his friend upstairs to clean up. He pushes him off to shave and shower before going downstairs to help himself to the kitchen.

It takes far longer than he anticipated, but Alex doesn’t go up to pressure the old Sargent even once. At last, the staircase creaks softly as Woods descends. He looks like a new man. Clean clothes, shaped up beard, and a gentle wafting of clean, musky shampoo emanating from him.

Woods walks up without much fanfare for himself, but Alex offers him a smile and a firm pat on the back, “There, now isn’t that better? You look great!”

Frank grunts and perhaps even mutters a thank you, but Mason is too busy trying to keep the momentum up. Once more, he drags his friend along and out to the car. The sun is starting to set and options for places to go are beginning to dwindle. Woods wonders where they’re going, and yet as the streets race by, he finds himself caring less and less.

By the time the car comes to a stop, he’s nearly fallen asleep.

Mason turns off the engine and shakes him awake, “Hey don’t fall asleep on me now, we’re just getting started!”

Woods snaps awake, but has to shield his eyes immediately. It seems impossibly bright out considering how late it is. He blinks a few times and rubs his eyes. Once they're fully adjusted, he finds that what he sees does nearly nothing to alleviate his confusion.

Before him stands the front of a pulsating night club. Blue and purple neon blaze in the dusky twilight. He can only imagine how they must look in the dead of night. A pounding beat comes from somewhere within, no doubt the drum track to some popular, modern song. Small clusters of younger people and a handful of adults hang around the doors pregaming for what they must be anticipating to be a long, wild night.

The pair get out of the car, but Woods is bewildered all the while. When Alex finally comes around to him, he can’t keep silent any longer, “What the fuck did you bring me here for?”

Mason seems almost taken aback, “For some fun? Come on, I know this isn’t really your scene but maybe that’s exactly what you need! Something new and fun, right?”, he doesn’t wait for a response, instead he pushes his friend along as they head towards the entrance.

The air seems thick and hazy around him, a fact only highlighted by the glowing miasma created by the neon interior. If Alex wasn’t pulling him along, he’s sure he’d get lost.

Alex takes him over to a table buried back in the corner. They take a seat and despite being right across from each other, Mason nearly has to shout to be heard over all the noise, “Want a drink?”

Woods thinks about it for a moment, still taking in the environment as he does so. He’s trying to find the bar, and when he does he figures it’s impossible to miss. A huge back wall of glass bottles, all lit up by a halo of purple neon and cool fluorescent lights stands bright as a beacon behind a solid bar top and array of stools and customers.

“Sure, I can get my own”

“Great! Hey, grab my usual would ya? I’m gonna take a leak real quick”, he points over his shoulder and excuses himself as he makes for the restrooms.

This… is not at all what he wanted.

Suddenly, Woods feels trapped and alone again, no better than he was back in his own home. Except now he’s surrounded by the heat, noise, and stench of over a hundred other people.

The lights feel heavy and blinding, the pulsating pop music, deafening. He trudges up to the bar slowly yet surely, but with every step he comes closer to committing to his plan of escaping back to Alex’s car.

He never should’ve went along with this… he was just fine at home, damn it.

Lost in his thoughts and half blinded by the smoke and lights, he runs smack into another person. With a dampened thud, they hit the ground hard. Wood swears under his breath and figures he can at least offer a hand. He bends down to help up the fallen individual, only to see…

You.

Suddenly, it’s as if all the haze and fog has cleared from his eyes. He can see you clear as day down here, and the noise and smells of the crowd all fade away. A soft blue glow highlights your features, and an electric magenta bounces off your hair. The sparkling, sequined little dress you wear glitters in the halo of light descending around you, and a thousand flecks of light reflect back onto his worn, tired face.

Woods' hand hangs in mid air, half way through it’s journey to assist you. He whispers your name, quietly and fondly, as though he never thought he’d see you again.

For the first time in what must have been days, a smile breaks free from his stern glower.

But all you see is the asshole who teased you along for weeks, only to give you the highest embarrassment by sending you off like a misbehaving child after you were at your most vulnerable with him.

You were ready to give him your very body, and he only felt up what he wanted and sent you off.

With a sneer, you slap his hand away and hop up on your own. You don’t even bother to spare him a word. Instead, you stare daggers into him and walk off.

For a moment. For a second time… He watches you go.

He should let you walk away.

After what he did, you deserve at least the privacy. And that’s aside from the fact that you’re clearly pissed.

But he can’t. Not again.

“Hey, wait!”, he dashes after you, shoving his way through the crowd. A little too roughly, he grabs your upper arm and spins you around. You yank yourself free from his grip and glare right through him. Even through all the rage…

You look so beautiful in this light.

“I… I- uh. Hey”

“Hey?”, your blood is boiling. Is that all he has to say for himself?

The venom in your voice makes him recoil, shrinking back into himself. But still… “I uh, I just… H-how are you… I didn’t think you’d be in a place like this, heh…”

Out of pure manners, you respond, “Fine. What are you doing here?”, you cross your arms, defensive, but genuinely curious.

Woods looks over his shoulder then all round, searching for any sign of Mason. Nothing. He snaps his attention back to you, trying to come up with any reason at all to explain himself. Frank stutters for an answer, but you end your indulgent lapse before he can say anything coherent and turn to walk away.

“Wait! I… I-I miss you...”

You whip around, seething with anger. Then, very seriously, you ask, “Are you following me?”

“What? No! Fuck no! I just… I miss you, that’s all!”

You scoff, “Well maybe you should’ve fucking thought of that first”

“...You’re right”

That stops you dead. This is nothing like the Woods you know… You can’t recall a single time he’s had the humility, let alone the balls, to admit that he’s wrong.

“Oh, yeah?”

“Yeah…”, he sighs, and even in the darkness of the club you can see a glimpse of just how much pain he’s in, “Look… I shouldn’t have done that, back there behind the gym. You trusted me and I fucked it up. I know. It’s just… I was scared”

A biting edge creeps back into your voice. You don’t buy that. “Scared? Of what, getting caught?”

“What? No! I was scared… that I was taking advantage of you, alright?”

You blink, and suddenly all the rage leaves you, as though the hot air was deflated right out of you. “Wh-what do you mean?”

“Well I mean… You know… Y-you’re just a kid, and I’m… not. I just- It didn’t feel right. Hell, I didn’t even get a chance to ask if you really wanted all that, I just… went for it”

You take a little step closer, your hard gaze softening just a touch, “Well… It’s not like I was saying no”, you chuckle

“Yeah, but that’s not the fucking same, you know?”

You look away, “Yeah…”

“So… Anyway… I’m sorry, alright?”

At last, you turn back and smile at him, “Alright. I forgive you, and… thanks. For saying that”

Woods nods and accepts your thanks. The two of you share a little smile and a short pause of uncertain silence until he breaks the silence, “So… What now?”

You look him up and down. He’s wearing jeans and a tightly fitting flannel, a stark contrast to all the trendy, flashy fashion of the rest of the clubbers, and yet it’s so… him. You trace a finger down his limp, tattooed arm, stopping at his fingers to intertwine them with yours.

“How about a dance?”, you tug his hand gently, then nod towards the dance floor.

A feeling like euphoria washes over him, and time seems slow as he floats along while you tug him through the crowd. Somewhere in the beautiful, prismatic show of lights, he hears himself agree. You lead him to a cramped, but vacant spot on the glowing dance floor and turn an ear to the music, “Hey, I love this song…”

Woods perks up to listen, just in time to catch the start of More Than A Woman, muffled slightly by all the noise and bustle of the crowd.

It’s like it’s playing from within a dream.

You rest your hands on his chest, letting them slide down so that the heels of your palms sit where the curve of his stomach begins to swell out. Frank has his hands on your waist, swaying in time with you slowly to the music. He clears his throat and looks away from your sparkling, gorgeous eyes, a nervous blush creeping up his neck.

He knows you’ve been over this before, but… “Yeah, uh… so, you know, I’ve been thinking I should lose some weight... You know, while you’ve been… gone”, he moves your hands up from his belly to clasp behind his neck.

You quirk up your brow, a confused smile on your lips, “Why?”

“Uh, I don’t know… I think it makes me look old, I guess”

You laugh and come a little closer, your bodies nearly touching, “Well, if it means anything... I don’t think so”, You inch up and kiss his cheek, bringing one hand down to rest on his softened pect. He huffs a nervous laugh and masks the flattered embarrassment with a timid smile as he covers your hand with his, holding it there just a little while more.

He's never forgotten how amazing your touch alone feels.

He clears his throat and re-establishes eye contact. A whole kaleidoscope of color plays inside your eyes. He could get lost in them for the rest of his life. “You uh… wow. You- you look beautiful tonight...”, he steals a quick glance as your little, sparkly dress and the neon rainbow refracting off the thousands of tiny sequins, “Nearly gave this old man a heart attack when I first saw you”, he laughs.

“Oh?”, you smirk and lead him into a turn, “ In that case, you should see me take it off”

His heart pounds underneath your palm, but his face looks frozen with surprise. He doesn’t hear women say that kind of stuff to him often…

“D-do you… Do you mean that?”

“Well, I mean… Maybe after this, I’d love t-”

“No, not that. I mean… Me. D-do you really feel that way about me?”

You stop dancing for a moment.

His words cut deeply with the quiver of hope they carry, as though it had never crossed his mind that someone would want to be with him.

“Of course I do. But… I want you more then just for that you know”, you chuckle.

His cheeks go pink, “Oh. Damn, so you like that kind of st-?”

You place a single finger to his lips, shushing him. “I meant… I love you”

Your words echo back to him in slow motion, as though reality and time itself are breaking all around him to unveil a haven of euphoria. His heart is beating in his ears, and yet it sounds slow and calm, just like the wild crowd and the blaring music all around him.

Everything grows quieter and softer until it all fades away, leaving behind just you and him.

He wracks his brain, trying to remember the last time he heard those words, only to come up empty handed. It’s been so long… He can’t even remember.

Frank looks back at you, a little neon angel clinging to his beat up old shirt. Gorgeous. That’s all he can think of when he sees you. He almost feels like he shouldn't even have the privilege to do so. You bat long lashes up at him and a slow smile draws across your soft, glossy lips.

More than a woman…

Slowly, you come up to meet your lips to his. You’ve kissed before, but this… It feels like the first kiss of his entire life.

He presses back gently, sucking softly as he draws you close. You smell like dark cherry and amber, some combination of perfume and lip gloss. The faint smell of whisky and musk radiating off of him mingles with the divine scent of you.

He can taste it all on his tongue, even as he slides it over to flick across yours.

More than a woman to me…

At long last you part, breathing softly as your eyes drift up to meet one another's. And when he looks down into those deep, glittering pools, he wonders how he never saw all the love and warmth they hold for him. The love they always had.

“I love you too…”, he whispers, tears stinging at his eyes and voice, before he leans in to press a kiss to your forehead.

And now? The love they always will.