#this man is always taking drinks from teammates both alcoholic and otherwise

[ratatatastic]

[asks mackie for his bottle] [has no qualms giving it to luosty] "hm?"

[luosty asks him if its okay to drink from it] [has to think about it for a few seconds]

"what?" [asks him again] [nods]

[takes an absolutely big swig] "whatever" [passes bottle back] "oh"

[takes a swig and passes it back]

special cameo ole patty trying to get mackies attention, you know, as someone whos currently his liney, and mackie not even giving him the time of day because hes too busy listening to luosty

terribly important conversations are being had here between lineys who are not currently lineys because the injury bug is a vicious thing around here or alternatively luosty does charm everyone yeah

florida panthers @ new york islanders | 10.26.24

[bokugaos]

A Little Reminder.

length: 2.5k

tags: nsfw, kuroo x f!reader, possessive kuroo, alcohol, penetration, bathroom sex, against the door/wall, mirror, creampie, love bites, jealous sex, walk of shame

a/n: for @mrs-kuroojinguji​ ;; the mrs kuroo bc my babe is in heat in pain rn ♡ kinda an expansion of a blurb from a few weeks ago ( 〃▽〃) and bc possessive tetsu is so mf yum dammit

Kuroo Tetsurou is a lot of things.

Smart, naturally. A captain, selfless in his endeavours to bring the name of his school and fellow teammates against his rivals, some of those who are technically his friends if he could so admit. Arrogant, yes, though he’d be remiss to call himself that. Not quite boisterous, but he knows he carries a certain charm and flair.

But there is one thing that Kuroo Tetsurou is not.

And it is patient.

 He leans his forearms against the bar, peeling at the moist label that is already coming off of the cold beer bottle he is holding. He glances at his watch, exhaling heavily through his nose. He drums his fingers against the side of the dark glass. You are late.

Kuroo is about to pull out his phone to text you when, over the buzz of the crowd and the music blaring from the speakers above, he hears the door open and close. 

He glances over and bite his lip slightly when he sees you walk in. You’re wearing red—his favorite color, the dress clinging to your curves like absolute sin.

Your hair cascades over your shoulder, exposing the side of your neck and your collarbone to the stale air of the bar. You spot him and start to walk over when someone blocks your path.

Kuroo looks on, irate. He downs the rest of his beer and gets up.

He shoves past a few people on his way over to you. You are talking animatedly to a rather handsome looking guy, but from what he can gather, none of the words you are saying to him are “fuck off”. He is tall and broad-shouldered, his hair is of a color that Kuroo absolutely despises, swept in a stylish pompadour. His teeth are blindingly white. He reminds Kuroo of the newly hired interns in his office.

You actually have a smile on your face and lean in to touch his arm. Kuroo feels jealousy rush through his entire being, lighting every nerve on fire.

“Tetsu!” You greet him once he finally catches up to you. You gently touches his shoulder. “Tetsu, this is my friend. And this is Tetsurou.”

“Nice to meet you,” They shook hands, and Kuroo tried to be polite. But his neutral face always holds a hint of annoyance, so he’s not sure if he’s being convincing in the slightest, not that he cares.

“Do you mind if he joins us for drinks?” you ask, batting your eyelashes at him.

Kuroo bites back a groan as you gaze up at him with those eyes that he can never refuse. “Fine.” 

You squeeze his hand appreciatively and the three of you find an empty booth to sit in. Kuroo moves to go sit next to you, but the other guy is quicker, and slides into the seat beside yours, forcing your own boyfriend to sit across from you. 

Your friend orders a round of drinks, and Kuroo sits there nursing his beer as the other man intrudes on what’s supposed to be time that you and him are supposed to have alone together for the first time in weeks.

—

Kuroo Tetsurou is many things.

Jealous is definitely one of them.

He watches as this man he doesn’t know wraps his arm around your waist in what is supposed to be a jovial sideways hug, but it doesn’t escape his notice that his hand lingered on you a moment too long, traveling southbound to rest on your ass, and that he leaned in a little too close.

Kuroo’s fingers grip onto the beer bottle, and he imagines it closing around the other man’s throat. Not that he’d ever actively try to hurt a lesser man outside the court, but the thought makes him feel better, at least.

Your friend leans over and whispers something into your ear and you laugh, the slight bounce making your skirt ride a little upwards, exposing even more skin. That is the last straw.

Kuroo slams his beer bottle against the table and both you and the man jump in your seats.

“Didn’t you say you need to use the bathroom to freshen up?” Kuroo asks, sounding both calm and polite. He casts a cursory glance to the other guy. “It’s your first time here, I’ll show you where it is.”

You nod and nudge your friend to take his hand off of you. Kuroo grabs you by the wrist and drags you toward the back of the bar. He leads you over to the bathrooms, ducks his head into the ladies room, and when he sees that it’s empty, he pulls you inside and locks the door behind him.

“Tetsu, what—” 

In an instant, your back is against the door and Kuroo is pressing his body flush against yours. His lips attack your own, one hand gripping at your waist and the other sliding under your ass to hook a leg over his hip. The muffled music blasted outside, making the door vibrate. You wonder in the back of your mind if the people outside can hear you.

You moan as his tongue slides into your mouth at the same time as his groin grinds against yours, pinning you there as you wiggle against him.

You place your hands on his shoulders and gently push him back, desperate for air. Panting, you let out a short, breathy laugh. “Is something wrong?”

“You know what’s wrong,” he growls, and you hear the sound of his belt buckle coming undone, along with the zipper of his fly. His mouth comes to your ear, sucking the lobe into his mouth and nibbling on it gently. “Did you like it when he was touching you?”

“Tetsu,” you pant as he sucks at the exposed skin of your neck before biting down, marking you with his teeth and sucking bruises along your collarbone. “I don’t under—”

“Didn’t know you’re such a slut.” He spits, hiking up the short length of your skirt over your hips, his rough, calloused hands sliding up and down the underside of your thigh. His lips came to hover over yours. “But I’m the only one who can touch you like this.”

“I’m sorry,” you say, barely over a whisper. You feel his clothed dick leaning against your core, your panties already soaked.

“Tell me,” he scoffs, coming in to bite at your lower lip. His hand that’s on your waist slides lower, under your skirt, and slides your ruined underwear to the side. “Do you think he can make you feel good?”

You whimper as you feel him rubbing his cock against your slick entrance, your arms are looped around his neck and grip at the back of his shirt as you try to push your hips against his. He retreats slightly, and his frown turns into a slight smirk.

“You think he can fuck you like I do?”

“No, no one else can,” you moan as he rubs his length against your core again, giving special attention to your clit with his thumb. “I’m all yours. Need you so bad, please fuck me, please—”

Before you even have a chance to finish speaking, Kuroo thrusts into you, hard, and you cry out for him to hear. His cock is big and hot, and it stretches you almost painfully as your body adjusts to his length. His lips are on yours again and he shoves his tongue into your mouth as he fucks you against the door, his hands gripping onto you tightly as you try to keep up with his rough pace. 

Your mouth falls away from his and you let out a cry as he pumps into you hard and deep, the head of his cock grazing deliciously against your walls.

“That’s right, baby,” Kuroo grunts, burying his nose into your hair to breathe in your scent. “Let everyone in this fucking bar know who you belong to.”

“Tetsu,” you gasp as his nails dig into your skin. Then his hand slides downwards, further down to your clit, and starts furiously rubbing circles against it. “S-So good—ahhh..!” 

Kuroo pulls you forward so that your shoulders are the only part of you against the door and grabs onto your hips, dragging you towards him with every forward thrust of his own. He hits you so deep it almost hurts.

“Louder,” he orders, rolling his hips just right. “Scream my name louder.”

Your head falls back and you do as commanded, screaming his name as your walls clenched hard around his shaft. He pulls out, and you thought he’s going to come as well, but instead he grabs a hold of your arm.

He leads you over to the sinks and bends you over, your arms resting against the cool porcelain. You can see him staring at you in the reflection of the mirror, his predatory gaze fixated on you. He grabs the skirt of your dress and hikes it up over your waist, exposing your shapely ass in the red lace you decided to wear that night.

Kuroo takes a second to appreciate the sight before moving your panties to the side again and burying his cock into your folds once more.

You bite back a moan as the head of his cock drags against your walls, and he strokes inside of you slowly a few times, dragging out each movement as his hands grip your ass, smoothing over the skin appreciatively.

 You watch his reflection in the mirror as he thrusts into you, taking his time. His eyebrows are furrowed, as if in deep concentration, a bead of sweat rolling down his forehead. His cheeks are slightly reddened, almost like he’d run a great distance, and his mouth is agape as quiet grunts escaped past his lips.

He catches your gaze in the mirror and he smirks. You can’t look away, too entranced by his eyes as they bore into yours. He slams into you, causing you to jerk forward, gripping onto the sides of the sink as your breasts threaten to spill out of the top of your dress. 

“Keep your eyes on me, kitten,” Kuroo orders as he fucks you hard, the sound of skin slapping filling the small room. You nod weakly and try your best to keep your knees from buckling as his cock works you perfectly with every rough thrust of his hips. 

“Tetsu,” you reach back for his hand. “Please, I’m so close!”

 Kuroo leans forward to kiss the back of your shoulder, and brings his hand around to your clit. His fingers graze against it, and the feeling makes you twitch, but otherwise he doesn't move.

“Beg me for it.”

 Your head hangs low for a moment before looking back up at his reflection. “...again?”

He thrusts into you hard, just once, and then holds you there, the tip of his cock hitting your cervix. You cry out his name.

“Please, Tetsu! I need it, I need you, please let me come, please—”

 He starts fucking you again, his speed picking up along with the roughness of his thrusts. “Who do you belong to?”

“You,” you whimper as he pummels into you over and over again.

“Say my name. Louder.”

“Tetsu—”

His dick pounds against you, and your mouth fall open.

 “Tetsurou—!”

“Now keep your eyes on the mirror,” he grunts as his fingers start working against your clit. “I want you to see what you look like, falling apart and coming hard on my cock.” 

Your face is flushed, your eyelids fluttering as you try to watch yourself hurtling toward bliss in the mirror. “I want you to remember that I’m the only one who gets to fuck you like this.”

His smirk still held in your periphery, and you keep your eyes on your own reflection for as long as you can before the sensation of his hands and his length inside of you becomes too much. You come, screaming his name, collapsing against the sink as your walls flutter around him. He follows you off the edge, spilling his seed inside of you as you try to catch your breath.

Kuroo rests his forehead against your shoulder as he slips out of you. You turn to face him, adjusting the skirt of your dress before grabbing him by the collar and pulling him in for a kiss. 

The kiss is surprisingly gentle, in contrast with the sex you just had. His hands cup the sides of your face and stroked gently at your cheekbones as he drinks you in. Your hands run appreciatively over his chest before you slip your hands between your bodies to help tuck his now softening cock back in his pants.

“What was that for?” you ask in a quiet voice as you pull away, your thumb coming up to graze against his right cheek.

“Nothing,” he lies. “I just missed you.”

You shake your head, a knowing smile on your lips. “He’s a friend, that’s all. He’s harmless, I promise!”

“Never seen a friend act like that towards me,” Kuroo counters, glaring off to the side. You chuckle and kiss him again, wiping the frown from his face.

You turn to check your reflection and see the bruises from Kuroo’s devilish mouth littering your neck and collarbone. You move your hair away from that side of your neck, making sure that the marks are in full view, knowing full well he’d particularly appreciate it if you don’t hide the reminder he left on your skin.

“I think everyone will know who I belong to,” you grin, stepping up onto your tiptoes to kiss him on the nose. “Now, come on. I’m not doing the walk of shame on my own out of this bar. You started it, so now you have to finish it.”

Kuroo chuckles and unlocks the bathroom door. He puts arm around your waist and you exit, standing tall with your chin up as the people around you regard you with wide eyes. The music still pulses around the room, and people are still talking amongst themselves and having a good time, but there are definitely several eyes on you both as you make your way back to your booth.

This time, you slide into the seat next to Kuroo as you get back, and the aforementioned man stares at you both. 

“Sorry that took so long,” you apologize, clearing your throat. Under the table, your hand comes to rest on Kuroo’s thigh. He leans back in his seat, his arm slung over your shoulders. He sends him a grin and a wink as he follows the line of his vision to where the numerous hickeys had formed on your skin.

Kuroo Tetsurou is a lot of things.

Smug is definitely one of them.

[inredunderlinedx]

ohohoh okay so we all know Nat isn’t that big on opening up to people, so i refuse to believe that she would be completely open with r initially. so maybe like R thinks nat doesn’t like her, and they’re at one of Starks balls/parties, and nat gets jealous that some of the men are starting to eye r up?? and the lyrics from exile “ i can see you standing honey with his arms around your body/laughing but the jokes not funny at all “

or even if r notices Nat’s staring and perhaps approaches her abt it? with the lyric “ i can see you staring honey like he’s just your understudy/like you’d get your knuckles bloody for me “

angst(?) with a good ol confession thing at the end? maybe a first kiss if you’re feeling it? female reader new avenger <333 THANKU ILY

A/n: OF COURSE! this is actually such a good idea! I’ll do a little mix of both 😉 @moonflowcrr

I can see you standing honey, with his arms around your body… Natasha Romanoff x reader

A/n: this fic will use she/her pronouns! As always requests for different pronouns in a new fic are welcome!

Being new is never fun in any situation. Being the new Avenger? So much harder.

The Avengers were like a family, and I was the foster kid their dad brought home one day. None of them knew what to do with me, so I felt pretty alone.

I tried to make friends, I really did, but most of them seemed annoyed by me and other were outright rude.

More specifically Natasha Romanoff, aka The Black Widow. I was positive she hated me.

She held me back from missions, made me spend hours training with her—where she would belittle me— and she completely disregarded my presence otherwise.

thankfully, Tony Stark seemed to take a liking to me after I helped him with a technical malfunction with his suit on a mission.

That’s how I ended up invited to a stark gala.

I knew what I should expect from the event, but honestly nothing could have prepared me for what it was actually like.

I showed up in a sparking black dress,

•

(Regular) it had a skirt to the floor, and a leg slit, the waist was perfectly fitted, and I had a single spaghetti strap on my shoulder in a pentagonal shape, leaning left.

(Modest) the dress was to the floor, it had a medium with skirt—just puffy enough to look nice, but not like a ball gown. The dress had a good fit, and the sleeves went down to my wrists, in a triangle attached to my ring finger

(With head covering) my hair was wrapped in black silk, with subtle sparkles here and there

•

The whole room was buzzing with conversation, I had not realized just how many people would be here.

I noticed many of my fellow teammates, as I looked around the crowded room.

I quickly walked to the open bar and ordered a glass of champagne. (Or sparkling cider if you don’t drink alcohol)

I stayed by the bar, having no idea where I should be. I felt incredibly overwhelmed and lost. I was an avenger, I should not be scared of a bunch of rich people.

I tried to look like I knew what I was as doing. I pretended to have a plan, I walked to the buffet with purpose even though I was panicking.

I felt like multiple eyes were on me but I couldn’t see anyone obviously staring.

“Hello, I’m Richard… you?” An older man said to me with a smile, if it wasn’t for his obvious stares at my boobs I would believe him to be sincere.

“I’m y/n.” I said hesitantly

“It’s a pleasure y/n. Would you care to dance? This is a favorite of mine.” He said awfully good at charming people into ignoring his obvious intentions.

“I’m not sure—“ before I could finish he had grabbed me and started dancing with me. I was absolutely disgusted but I played it off like I thought it was funny

The night filled with men of all ages talking to me while i tired to politely hint that I wasn’t interested due to the fact that I was gay as fuck.

None of them got the hint, but then again, it’s not like men are well known for listening when you say no.

Eventually I escaped the carousel of men asking me to dance and complimenting my body.

I saw Natasha staring at me, looking slightly agitated, from across the room.

I tried to ignore it and went to the other side of the bar, to avoid her presence.

“So.” She said appearing beside me, “you seemed to get a lot of attention tonight. Looking for something with deep pockets?”

I looked at her, completely insulted by the insinuation.

“Excuse me?” I said, finally gaining soon courage, “that out there, was not at all what I came here to do. Way to victim blame though. I’m glad that without even speaking to me you managed to decide I was a gold digger.”

I took a shot of vodka (or not) and stormed out the exit. I called a cab and went back to the compound immediately. I was so pissed off. I never did anything to her.

She had no right to speak to me like that.

Once I got inside I went to my bedroom and changed into athletic clothes.

I went down to the gym, and I started running, when the running stopped helping, I hit the punching bag.

I knew my fists would be red and cracked tomorrow but I couldn’t stop my fists from colliding with the bag; I was semi-addicted to the sense of relief I felt with my hands hit the bag.

“Y/n.” A voice called.

It was Natasha. I ignored her.

“Y/n.” She said, more firmly this time.

I still ignored her

“Y/n!” She snapped, grabbing the bag and holding it in place.

“What?” I said, my eyes burning with rage.

“Look, I’m sorry I said that-“

“No you aren’t!” I said

“Yes I am.” She continued, “just hear me out?”

“Fine.” I said still angry.

“I shouldn’t have said those things. It was wrong. I had no right. My behavior towards you has been completely uncalled for and unprofessional.” She said, looking guilty.

“Then why did you do it? What did I do to you?”

“Nothing! I was jealous.”

“I’m sure you could flirt circles around me, if you want to date any dude you want, that’s fine with me. I’m gay. So I wasn’t flirting at all tonight.”

“No— y/n. I was jealous, but not of you, of them. I didn’t want anyone to flirt with you. And I didn’t want you to get hurt on missions, but I can’t be around you without wanting to push you up against the wall.”

“Oh.” I said completely speechless.

“I know it’s unprofessional, and I plan to have us separated in the future, I’m sorry if this made you uncomfortable, I will stay away from you.”

“No- Natasha, wait.” I said, “I like you too, I just thought you hated my guts.”

“Oh my god I’m sorry. I just couldn’t be around you without feeling all mushy.”

“It’s okay…” I said smirking, “so… what was that about pushing me up against the wall?”

[uwurakax]

Hiya! I love this event <3 May I request Suna + Stolen Dance by Milky Chance? I always felt like this song was bittersweet - kind of like knowing that you love eachother but can't be together/forbidden love (hence the "stolen dance"). Not sure if that makes sense haha but thank you for the event :)

OMG I’m sorry this took forever!! Omg omg throwback! Hehe. Interesting, i can for sure do the forbidden love trope. Also made it a bit angsty (i feel like it goes w the forbidden love trope) i really enjoyed this one though tysm for sending it 💕

(i had many ideas on which way this could’ve gone - and it ended with a toss up between this and a royalty au idea i had)

♡ 200 Follower Event Here ♡

stolen dance ♡

pairing: suna x f!reader ♡

genre: angsty-ish // forbidden love // time-skip spoilers ♡

summary: he loved her, she loved him and they’d forever be by each other’s side. it’s too bad it had to be behind closed doors ♡

word count: 1.2k ♡

♡ (inspired by stolen dance by milky chance) ♡

“You want another?”

“Yes please!”

You watched as Osamu left you, making his way to get you, yet another drink for the night. You were anxious and jittery, waiting for your “boyfriend” to arrive. At least that’s what everyone who was close to both of you had said.

It wasn’t that you didn’t like Suna Rintarō, you did; and he liked you. You were both made for each other - his old teammates from high school thought so anyway.

You just hated when the tabloids captured him with some famous girl, claiming the two of them started a budding new romance.

The jealousy that arose in you was unwarranted; but you couldn’t help the sadness that ached within you at seeing the two of them together. It didn’t help that the media and fans alike were gushing over how cute they looked, or how they’d be the perfect couple. The two even garnering a ‘ship name’ online; it was a hit to your pride to say the least.

After you closed off from Suna, and it had affected your relationship (friendship or otherwise), he begged to know what happened and you reluctantly told him. It didn’t take long before Suna had gone up to his coach and management, prompting discussion about his private and love life. It had shocked you none the less when he made claims of wanting to put rumours to rest, wanting to go out and parade you around. Needless to say, any and every higher up was against it. Suna being an eligible bachelor was much more desirable and marketable as a single man; or so they said.

You just weren’t good enough for Suna.

You were just some lowly waitress working part time at a lowkey restaurant. Someone like you couldn’t be seen with Suna. That fact was obvious; considering the many paparazzi photos taken of him and any new and upcoming female star. Actress, model, singer; it didn’t matter as long as they were beautiful, gorgeous and famous.

The complete opposite to you.

“Hey! What are you doing spacing out like that”

You felt an elbow jab into your rib, wincing at the shock initial impact. It didn’t hurt per-say, it just surprised you enough to bring you out of your depressing thoughts. You turned to see the blond headed twin, elbowing him back.

“Nothing! What do you want ‘Tsumu?”

He just shrugged, taking a swig out of whatever alcoholic drink was in his cup. You rolled your eyes, looking away from Atsumu.

“Hey”

You turned at the sound of a new voice. Suna smiled down at you, handing you the requested drink that Osamu was supposed to give to you.

“Hey, thanks Rin” you beamed, gently taking the offered cup and taking a sip.

“What took you so long?”

“Had to fend off the news media outlets. I keep getting bombarded with questions” he took a drink of his own, gulping down a large mouthful of burning liquid. He spared you your feelings, but you knew they were asking about the new gossip about him and someone new.

Honestly it seemed quite tragic, to like someone this much and never be able to tell the world that. Even if you did, you knew Suna was following his dreams, and if this is what you had to bear then you’d gladly do so.

You and Suna had continue to converse for a good twenty minutes. Unbeknownst to either of you, Suna’s old high school friends and current teammates looked on sadly. They knew, and couldn’t believe how unfair it was. It seemed bittersweet that only they would have the fortune of seeing Suna this happy; the photos spread online didn’t hold a candle to how he smiled when he was with you.

You both eventually got tired of talking, letting the bass of the music and alcohol thrum within you. You couldn’t remember the who, what or why in anything; all you knew was that somehow you and Suna had ended up dancing in the middle of the room, his hands on your waist and yours around his neck. You both swayed to the rhythm of the pop song blaring from the speakers, enjoying the small window of opportunity of being in each others presence.

You held onto Suna close, inhaling his scent, letting the warmth of his body envelope you, listening to the sweet nothings that fell from his lips. You were absolutely smitten with Suna and it felt cruel to hide that.

The small things that couples take for granted, you wanted.

You wanted to hold his hand, go out to eat together, cheer for him loudly while proudly wearing his jersey number. You couldn’t understand why they wouldn’t let you both be this way. Because they didn’t deem you good enough to be seen in public like that with Suna.

You’d be seen as some gold digger, only after Suna’s money and fame to get ahead in life.

You bunched up your hands in Suna’s shirt unknowingly, frustration now coursing through you. Suna took in a deep breath to steady himself. The entirety of the situation angered him too. He knew what the higher ups and his coach said about you. He was constantly arguing with them about it, furious that he had to endure whatever the tabloids had said about him and anyone else that wasn’t you.

He hated seeing his face plastered everywhere with some pretty model or actress. Hated having to deal with the rumours that online websites had circulated, only gaining relevancy due to his name.

Sometimes Suna wondered if it was even worth it anymore. He loved volleyball, this an irrefutable fact. He loved it so much he made it his career. He couldn’t see himself doing anything else.

Yes, Suna Rintarō loved volleyball, that was an irrefutable fact but...

He also loved you.

“Hey, it’s alright” Suna caressed your arms before pulling you close. He didn’t know whether he was trying to reassure you or himself.

“I know, it’s fine Rin. I’m okay don’t worry about it” the way your voice wavered slightly had his heart aching. It wasn’t fair to you. He’s sure you saw everything on social media about him, it was hard not to when it would he plastered everywhere. He couldn’t imagine how you felt when you saw dating rumours about him and another woman.

The beat if a new song boomed throughout the room, small cheers and hollering at the upbeat tempo. You smiled, letting the music mask your inner sadness for now. This was your time with Rintarō, you wouldn’t spend it down in the dumps.

“Come on let’s dance” you chuckled slightly, hoping that you could convince Suna to resume a happier feeling. He could see what you were doing, like transparent glass he always knew how to read you. He’d let this slide though, for your sake. He grinned back at you, taking the lead and spinning you around.

Even if neither of you could outright say, or display the feelings you felt for one another, being here like this and now, was enough. In each others arms, like this, you could show the love you had. Even if it was hidden from the world, it was okay, because only the two of you mattered.

[yet-another-fan-girl9]

Never Have I Ever

Summary: Never Have I Ever with some drunk superheroes is not the best time to have secrets.

Warnings: alcohol consumption

Word Count: 1544

~*~

The moment Tony pulled out the copious amount of alcohol from behind the bar, you knew that the night was either going to end in broken glass or broken bones. Something that wasn’t televised to the public was that the Avengers were intensely competitive. Pair the enhanced individuals, geniuses, spies, and supersoldiers with some alcohol and disaster was imminent.

By one in the morning, a wall sported multiple holes from fists, bullets, and a shield. The team eventually collapsed in a circle in the living room. Bucky and Steve were, unsurprisingly, the soberest. Thor, who was off-world, left a flask of Asgardian mead that the two supersoldiers were drinking sparingly.

You waited until everyone was settled before sitting between Bucky and Clint. The supersoldier to your left shot you a smile as you dramatically sighed. You smiled back, staring into his blue eyes. Spoiler alert: you liked the Winter Soldier. He took a sip of his spiked whiskey and licked his lips. You were still staring and could feel a blush creep up your face.

“Let’s play a game,” Tony spoke up.

You forced yourself to look at him, trying to ignore Bucky. Definitely ignoring Clint as he waggled his eyebrows at you while his eyes darted from you to Bucky.

“And break more stuff?” Bruce shook his head. “You always complain about that in the morning.”

“Let’s play a drinking game,” Tony tried again.

“I’m pretty sure everyone here is intoxicated enough,” Steve reasoned. “We should probably go—”

“Never have I ever!” you suggested much louder than you intended. Maybe Steve was right. It was too late, though, as your team members jumped to the idea.

Tony leaped to get enough shot glasses, ten for everyone. Natasha filled the glasses with everyone’s preferred drink.

“You two fossils know how to play, right?” Tony pointed at Bucky and Steve. Before they could answer, he jumped into the explanation. “You have to say, ‘Never have I ever done whatever.’ And it has to be something you’ve never done.”

“I think the name of the game speaks for itself,” Bucky interrupted.

“If you’ve done the thing the person says,” Tony continued, ignoring the snark. “Then you take a shot. When you run out of shots, you lose.”

“No targeting!” Wanda spoke up this time.

“Targeting is where you say something really specific to get one person out,” Sam said in response to Steve’s face. “Like I can’t say, ‘Never have I ever been a Hydra assassin with one metal arm.’”

Bucky glared at Sam and you, without thinking, shushed the Falcon. It was the alcohol’s fault. Bucky still gave you a smile so that’s all that matters.

“I’m starting!” Tony grinned. “Never have I ever been a Hydra experiment.”

You rolled your eyes as you, Bucky, and Wanda threw back your first shot.

Steve went next, “Never have I ever… gotten a piercing.”

You, Wanda, Nat, Clint, and Tony took a shot.

“What?” Tony responded to the questioning looks.

“What did you get pierced?” Clint supplied.

“I just got like one piercing in my ear. I took it out ages ago. What ‘bout you?”

“Same deal. Next!”

“Never have I ever kissed a teammate,” Sam smirked. He watched as the majority of the people took a shot. “What? Who?”

“Nat and (Y/N),” Steve was the first to answer. “It was for a mission.”

“Nat for me too. It wasn’t really a mission,” said Bruce.

“Steve, Bruce, (Y/N), and Clint,” Nat looked at everyone she mentioned. “Maybe a mission, maybe not.”

“You kissed Steve?” Bucky asked, his brow furrowed.

“It was for a mission,” you assured him. Then your alcohol muddled brain caused you to add: “Don’t worry babe, didn’t mean anythin’.”

It seemed as time stood still. Babe? It could mean anything. You called other people babe before, right? Right?

“Uh, never have I ever kissed someone of the opposite gender.” Bruce came to your rescue. “Not for a mission,” he added.

You and Nat caught each other’s eyes before taking a shot.

“I think I’m losing,” you grumble as you look at your four empty glasses.

“And I’m winning.” Sam gestured to his ten full glasses.

“Did you actually kiss Nat? Romantically?” Steve looked at you.

“Yeah,” you mumbled. “It was only once. I also had girlfriends, ya know.”

“So you’re…” Bucky waited for you to fill in the blank.

“Bi. Bisexual.”

“Okay, cool.” He still gave you his stunning smile. “Never have I ever flown without a plane or helicopter.”

Sam, Tony, and Wanda took a shot as you got lost in your head. Did he care? Was your sexuality a dealbreaker? Times were different when he grew up. He moved on from the topic pretty quickly. This was the first time you had talked about your sexuality in front of the team. You usually just let people find out.

“Hey, (Y/N)!” Sam was waving his arm. “Earth to (Y/N)! It’s your turn.”

You glared at him and then at his one empty cup. “Never have I ever been to war.”

Bucky, Steve, and Sam took their shots and Clint quickly went ahead with his question.

“Never have I ever had a crush on a teammate in the past three months!”

“That’s pretty specific, man,” Sam pointed out, but Clint was happily watching as you took a shot.

Some movement to your left caught your attention and you turned your head and watched Bucky take a shot. His blue eyes never breaking contact with your (e/c) ones. Who did he like? Wanda? She was with Vision. Natasha? They had history from the Red Room. Clint snickered from your right and you shot a glare at his direction. Unfortunately, Wanda caught on.

“Never have I ever accidentally called my crush ‘babe.’ Drunk or otherwise.”

“I’m pretty sure that’s targeting,” you mumbled as you took a shot. Four left. Your face was burning and the room felt ten degrees warmer.

“It’s not if someone else did it.” Tony took a shot. “I did it to Pepper once.”

You could feel Bucky’s gaze on you. What was he thinking? You should never have suggested this stupid game. You were losing too.

“Never have I ever broken up with a girl to crush on someone else for over three months.” Great Nat was in on this too. 

“C’mon! That’s targeting!”

Sam narrowed his eyes. “So you admit that you did that?”

Goddamn spies and their stupid plans to make you confess your stupid crush on some supersoldier.

“That is targeting, Nat,” Bucky agreed. You chanced a glance at him and for the umpteenth time that night, your eyes locked. You could feel your heart skip a beat before speeding up.

“Thanks,” was all you managed to get out.

“Choose something else,” Wanda prompted the redhead.

“Fine. Never have I ever had a pet.”

You were down to three. It was back to Tony.

“Never have I ever roleplayed in the bedroom.”

“I don’t believe that,” you scoffed as you take a shot along with Sam, Clint, and Nat.

“Me neither.” Sam nodded.

“Never have I ever had a crush on someone bi. That I know of.” Steve grinned mischievously at Bucky who took a shot. You and Tony took one too. Great. You had one shot left.

“Never have I ever had a crush on someone with a nickname that sounds nothing like their actual name.”

“C’mon Bruce!” You reluctantly pick up your last glass. “I thought you were better than that.” Tony almost choked on his own shot. “Well, I’ve lost, I’m drunk, and I’m going to bed. Goodbye.”

You stand up quickly. Too quickly and you would have faceplanted into the glass coffee table if Bucky hadn’t grabbed your arm. He stood up with you and placed one hand on each of your shoulders to guide you to your room. You both simultaneously glare at the team as they cheered. Sam and Tony whistled at you.

When you reached your room, you entered, but Bucky didn’t leave. He leaned against your door frame as you threw yourself onto your bed. The action made your head spin so you shoved your face into one of your many pillows.

“Uh, so,” Bucky’s voice reached your ears, but you refused to remove your face from the pillow. “I think I know the answer but… it’s me right? Your crush.” You nod. “Well, if Steve didn’t make it obvious enough, I like you too.”

Finally, you turn your head to face the supersoldier in your doorway.

“The um… me being bi doesn’t bother you?” you nervously voice your concerns.

“No. Not at all.” Bucky moved forward and sat on your bed. “I like you and your sexuality is a part of who you are.”

“Thank you.” The moment felt like a good moment to kiss him so you sat up. Unfortunately, your head spun and you groaned.

Bucky chuckled. “You’re drunk. We’ll definitely continue this tomorrow.”

He moved to you and pressed his lips against yours. The kiss was soft and gentle, but it held so much behind it. Then he pulled away and you let out a whine. It was over too soon.

“Tomorrow,” he promised. “Goodnight, (Y/N).”

Tomorrow couldn’t come fast enough.

[alphawave-writes]

Clapback

Fuse/Caustic (GasGrenade? Fitznox? Dunno, I’ll use them both) SFW fanfic

Read it here or find on AO3 via this link.

Synopsis: Caustic decides to confront Fuse on a certain incident that occurred live on intergalactic waves involving Fuse's hand and his posterior.

—

Caustic is certainly not the guy to get his ass slapped. Caustic is certainly not the type of person to let people close enough to even slap his ass in the first place, but the games forces him to take a closer proximity to people. Relationships are confusing, messy diagrams of webs and chains and links, just as human bodies are, and it reminds Caustic why he never went into Genetics. Or, for that matter, why there are few who would dare approach him.

But Fuse is a special type of individual with all of the worst traits of the dumbest legends. He has the loud mouth of Mirage, the act-first-think-later attitude of Octane, and—on the rare occasion he gets serious—the wry snark of that pestiferous Crypto. It's no secret that Salvo is full of savages, which makes him a surprisingly capable teammate, so of course the producers of the Apex Games decide that for his very first game, he should be in a team with Caustic and Bloodhound. Of course he talks a big talk, but otherwise he has shown himself to be a capable individual on the battlefield. Unlike Crypto or Natalie or the countless other scientists he knew in the past, Caustic doesn't expect Fuse to be the kind to stab him in the back.

And then Fuse slaps Caustic's ass. Live. For all to see.

And with that, his carefully tailored public reputation, the persona of Caustic, it has all crumbled down to a few key words. Caustic: the man who's ass got slapped on intergalactic waves, and appeared to like it.

"Mate, it's just a cheeky thing the mates do to each other on Salvo. You're telling me you guys don't slap each other's ass after a game of footy or somethin'?"

"This is not Salvo," Caustic reminds Fuse for what must be the hundredth time. Internally, he has to remember to check up what 'footy' is. Probably Salvonian slang for something gruesome.

"Yeah, nah, I get that, doc, you don't have to remind me," Fuse sighs. "Look, even I admit I was tryna rile up the crowd, but I didn't mean to get you stuck in all this sh—mess." 

At least the man has some common sense not to use such vulgar language around him. Quite frankly he finds such crude words indicative of low intelligence. "It does not matter what the crowd thinks," Caustic says, even though he knows that's a bit of a lie. "What matters is that you have put me in an uncompromising position."

"Well, I haven't got you to an uncompromising position yet," Fuse smirks.

Caustic glares at him. "I expect you to rectify this immediately."

"OK, OK, sheesh. Look, I'll let ya in on somethin', if you wanna let the whole thing slip away, you just gotta let it die first. Fighting fire with fire may work on the field, but it ain't gonna stop people from coming up with ideas. Trust me, the amount of people who thought I was shacking up with Mags—er, Maggie—of all people…" Fuse shivers. When Caustic doesn't look convinced, he adds, "I've got an interview coming up tomorrow. If it pops up, I'll just say it's a Salvo thing. If it doesn't, I ain't gonna say squat."

Caustic doesn't know if Fuse is more wily than he gives himself credit for, or if he is just as idiotically open as Caustic assumes him to be, but his first instinct is to trust Fuse will keep his word. It's a strange instinct for Caustic to have.

"Fine. But I expect you to not mock me anymore in the future."

"No prob, doc. Although if you don't mind an old fella saying something?"

Caustic just knows he's going to regret this.

"You do got a nice ass. Real girth to that thing," Fuse wolf whistles appreciatively as he not so surreptitiously glances at Caustic's behind. "Ditch the apron, and I bet that beauty could be an ordnance on its own."

"Fuse," Caustic growls.

"That's the name, don't wear it out," Fuse smirks.

With a surprising amount of speed, Caustic takes Fuse into a hold and shoved him to the wall. His voice is low, his hold absolute. Months  and years in the Apex games have taught him many, many ways to kill and just as many to subdue.

"Oy, easy on the vest."

"What's your game?" Caustic hisses.

"Nngh. Let go of me!"

"Or what?"

Fuse tries to turn his head, his laidback expression transformed into something darker. Caustic does not disbelieve Fuse's claims of being a mercenary on the last, but he found his boast of being one of Salvo's best a stretch. But he's

"You wanna try me, Doc Nox?" Fuse grunts.

"How did you…?"

That second of surprise is all it takes for Fuse to slip out of Caustic's grasp and reverse the situation, pushing Caustic into the wall. It is now that Caustic sees he has miscalculated. He was too tight, put too much strength and effort to shove Fuse into the wall. The correct grip is a little bit lower, utilising not just hands but knees. Fuse's hold might seem more laidback compared to Caustic's attempt, but there is no doubt that Fuse has done this plenty more times before in the past. Despite his bigger size, Caustic doesn't imagine he will slip out quite so easily unless Fuse allows him to.

So there are hidden depths to this man after all. A fascinating test subject for the future, to be sure.

"Don't think I didn't do my research before comin' here. I gave it all up to be here, and I don't go all in without knowing the stakes. Had a client of mine try ask me to track you down. Said that ain't my style, but I remembered. And when you stay a merc at my age," he taps his skull with his metal hand, "you tend to remember things."

Caustic grunts. "I have no idea what you are talking about."

"We all know being in the Apex games protects you, and you know what? It's the same for me, mate. You play up the cameras, kill and get killed over and over again for entertainment, and if they like you, you get to live another day. And I also know once people know who the mysterious doc Caustic is, they ain't gonna risk letting you kick about and murk up the Apex bloody games."

"Then blackmail me. Kill me," Caustic hisses.

"Believe me, if I were hired to, I will. But since I'm not…" Fuse lets go of Caustic. He takes a step back, his light fingers drifting away from Caustic’s clothed limbs. The move is casual but done deliberately. A lot of what Fuse does and says, Caustic realises, is deliberate. Whether it's the result he wants is a secondary concern.

Caustic turns to Fuse and stares. "I do not know if you're idiotic or moronic to let me go without some form of payment."

Fuse sighs. "Doc, this ain't the games and this ain't Salvo. You said that, right? Ain't gonna spill your secret because I feel petty or nothing. We both want to be here, and we'll do our bloody hardest to stay here. You wanna take it out on me, take it out on the ring." His lips curl into a smirk. "I'm also more than happy to take it out in the bedroom, if that's your thing."

Caustic bristles. He's no imbecile, he knows when he is being propositioned, but he is not playing that game. Not with a man he barely knows. "You still want something from me. Tell me now."

"Well, if you really want to buy my silence," Fuse allows a small smile, "how about a drink sometime? You, me, couple bottles of beer, bit of classical music. Get to know each other better."

There is a lot to decipher with that sentence. A lot. But of all the the things Caustic can possibly address, "Classical music?"

"You know, Acca Dacca, INXS, Tame Impala. The real classics, not like that stuffy ones, ey?"

Caustic stifles a groan. "When you say classical music, I was expecting Mozart. Beethoven."

"Would you accept if I did that kinda classical music?" Fuse crosses his arms and leans just a bit too close to Caustic. 

"Typical Salvonian," Caustic mutters under his breath. Always so forward. Always think they can take whatever they want.  

"Ain't an answer, mate," Fuse says.

It's data. Possibly useful data from a new test subject. That's what he's going to tell himself. "One drink, at a venue of my choice. I can and will leave at any time I choose." 

"Deal. Tomorrow at 8 alright?"

"Fine."

"Cool. Then I'll see ya later, darl." Before Caustic can react, Fuse gives another firm slap to Caustic's ass and quickly walks away without another word, disappearing down the hallway.

As Caustic watches Fuse walk away, hand on his ass and equations ringing through his head, he begins to suspect that he might have bit off more than he can chew. He takes out his notepad, which he uses to write notes on the go, and flips over to the latest page.

8pm 12th February. Meet up with subject Walter 'Fuse' Fitzroy for alcoholic beverages and music. Objective: obtain data on subject. Ascertain weaknesses and strengths. Assess whether to team up with for future battles.

Note to self: bring padded pants and lotion.

[tamcitrus]

10 years later.

pairing: Bokuto Koutaro x g/n reader.

genre: angst, aged up characters

word count: 2K ~

prompt: It had been 10 years since your main character last saw their biggest crush. How they both ended up in the same city away from their hometowns makes no sense to them. How do they react and how does the story unfold?

a/n: first time using the prompt of the week! @kingkags I hope you're up for some angst 🌈 and @loneveenas I hope you like what I come up for your potw! 💕

It started with you coming back from abroad after getting your degree. You were outside your country for many years. After your parents' divorce and your break up with some foreign guy, you decided to come back home with your mom. You were in contact with your best friend in Tokyo and you meet her boyfriend, Hinata Shouyou.

"Come on, you have to come with me, you'll have fun and Shou has a lot of hot friends! Just for a while, if you're not vibing with it we can leave. You're sleeping here tonight anyways, so..." she said.

"Will there be alcohol?"

"Yeah, it's a party! They reserved a little restaurant, so it'll be just the team and their friends."

"Ok then we go," you agreed.

And later, you were happy you did.

You met Hinata as soon as you arrived.

"Order whatever you want, y/n! The drinks are on the team!" Hinata said and then he took his girlfriend away.

You walked to the bar and ordered a beer, watching everyone talk and dance. Hinata really had some handsome teammates. Maybe, with a bit of alcohol running through your system, you could talk to one of them.

"I'll take a beer, please 'Samu!" a man said by your side to a guy who seemed to be the bartender.

His voice was familiar. You looked aside to see the guy and gasped. This… couldn't be.

And then, the biggest golden eyes looked at you, and after a minute they showed recognition. And you remembered him too.

"Bokuto-kun?" you asked, just in case your memory betrayed you.

"Y/n? Oh my god, it's you!" he was as loud as you remembered him.

He was going to hug you but stopped to look at you and check if you were ok with it. You smiled at him and tied your arms around his neck. He hugged you tight from your waist.

"I can't believe you're here! How long it's been? Five years?"

"Like ten actually," you laughed. "I… do you play with Hinata?"

"Yeah! Do you know him?" he let you go.

"His girlfriend is my best friend, they invited me," you explained.

“That’s crazy! We live in a small world, right? Did you see the game?”

“No, sorry,” you laughed. “We just got here. But it’s great to see you’re a pro now, it really suits you.”

He guided you to an empty table and told you about how he became pro and how some of his teammates were his rivals back at high school. You told him about your years abroad, and how you decided to come back after a failed relationship.

“Are you living in our old neighborhood?” he said.

“No, we're here in the big city now.”

“Hey hey, Bokkun, we were looking for you! We'll play beer pong, are you in?" a blond guy interrupted your talk. "How about you? Wanna play...?"

"I'm y/n. And yes, I'd like to play," you smiled.

"He's Miya Atsumu. Tsumu this is y/n, an old friend!" Bokuto introduced you to his teammate.

He shook your hand and smiled at you. Then you followed him to the group that was playing.

A two hours and a lot of drinks later, you were drunk. Your friend found you again, sitting in a couch and laughing with Bokuto and Atsumu. She sat by your side to talk to you in the ear. Hinata was holding her hand, still standing.

"Hey, I'm gonna get going, I have something to do," she told you and you laughed.

You were too drunk to think straight and you slowly understood her words.

"Are you ditching me? Sakura?" you said, a bit louder than you intended.

"I can take you to her house later!" a smiling Bokuto offered and then he winked at Hinata.

"That's great, Shouyou will text you my address! Thanks, Bokuto-san! See you later, babe!"

And with a kiss on your cheek your friend left you there. You wanted to say something else but the alcohol in your system didn't allowed you to.

"You can crush in my place, if you want," Bokuto sit closer to you once Atsumu got up to talk to someone. "I don't think they'll end their thing soon, Hinata has a lot of stamina," he laughed.

You nodded and try to get up. Bokuto laughed when you almost trip with your own feet and grabbed your arm to keep you steady.

"Ok, maybe we can get going too, what do you think?"

"Are you sure? I don't want to bust your celebration," you pouted.

"I'm sure, yeah, I'm tired anyway. I'll text Hinata so your friend won't worry, ok? I'mma go say goodbye to the boys and be right back with you!"

He was still the same caring friend from ten years ago. It made your stomach to feel butterflies.

You sat on a chair near the door and you waited for him to come back. You texted Sakura, or at least you tried to, you'll check it in the morning. Bokuto was back in a few minutes and he guided you to his car. The trip was silent but you appreciated it. The cold wind of the night sober you up a bit.

"Thank you for inviting me, Bokuto," you said when you arrived. "You're probably the only person I trust in this city besides Sakura," you laughed.

"No problem. It was crazy to see you there today. Maybe we can finish our talk in the morning," he smiled.He signaled you to wait a minute and you sat on his couch.

He had a nice apartment, there was books everywhere and weights among other training stuff. You didn't remember he was a fan of books in the past.

Bokuto was back, changed, and offered you some clothes for you to change too.

"There's my bedroom, you have a bathroom inside and if you need anything else, I'll be in the couch."

"I can't come back after a decade and take your bed. I'll sleep in the couch."

"Y/n, you had too much alcohol to sleep in a tiny couch. You don't want your body aching with your head tomorrow, trust me," he laughed. "Please, use my bed."

"Ok but if you're uncomfortable, let me know," you said.

You really wanted to stay awake and keep talking to him, but your body thought otherwise. As soon as you got changed and hit the king size bed, you were out.

-

The next morning you woke up with a horrible headache and the smell of coffee dragging you to consciousness. Bokuto was humming to some pop song that was playing in a low volume.

"Good morning," you said after cleaning yourself up and walking outside the room.

"Hey, y/n, good morning! Do you have a headache? I don't have any medicine for it but I can drive you to your friend's place and we can get some in the way," he was turned with your back at you.

It was surreal. He was there, your childhood best friend, your biggest crush ever, the same you remembered him from many years ago: friendly, selfless, funny, the same black and grey wild hair. And somehow he was even more handsome now.

"I can take the bus there, don't worry about it. Do you need help?"

"All done!" he walked to the table with a tray with two coffees and cookies.

"We can go out next time and I'll pay, in return for last night," you said. "Well, if you want…"

"I have a few free days this week so I'll take your offer," he smiled.

The breakfast was for catching up, again. You felt you could talk to him about your years without seeing each other forever. He talked to you about high school after you left, volleyball and his pro career. And you exchanged numbers. Then, he drove you to Sakura's place. Hinata was still there so they left together.

"I can't believe you left me there last night," you said to your friend when you were alone.

"Hinata told me you and Bokuto knew each other, so I thought you'd be fine, I wasn't gonna leave you with some stranger!" she excused. "And you left with him! What happened?"

"Nothing happened, I was drunk…"

-

Bokuto texted you later that week and you met again on his free day for dinner.

"Life's pretty much the same but sometimes people recognizes me or stops me in the streets now, that's crazy," he laughed. "What about you?"

"Nothing that interesting. I got my business degree in England and I'm working at my mom's company for now, until I can use my degree here," you took a sip of your wine.

"And your failed relationship?"

"Oh, I thought he was a good guy but it turned out he wasn't," you faked a smile. "I wouldn't say I was in love but I cared about that idiot."

"That's a shame, you were a great person when you lived here and I bet you're even better now," he commented.

"Thanks, Bokuto," you blushed.

I shouldn't let my hopes up, you thought. Surely he has someone in his life after all this time. I shouldn't revive an old feeling.

"Shit, sorry, I have to get this," he said when his phone rang.

"No problem, I'll ask for the dessert while you talk," you smiled and he nodded at you.

-

You saw each other several times the next two weeks. Every talk, every text, every meeting you had reminded you why you were in love with him. Maybe you never really got over him. Maybe, deep inside, you still loved him.

"I'd say you go for it!" Sakura told you one day. "I never heard that he had a partner and, come on, how could you not brag if you were dating someone like him? We should've seen a picture or something."

"I don't think Hinata would be happy to hear you say that," you laughed and tried to avoid the topic.

"Come on, y/n. You're amazing and he seems to be interested to rebuild your friendship after a decade. Shoot your shot, my friend, don't let the opportunity vanish again."

You sighed and kept drinking with your friend. Maybe next time, you thought.

-

A week later, you were at Bokuto's place again, having "the afternoon english tea" as he said. You even got him some blends to try.

"You did this every day when you were abroad?" he asked.

"No, not always. I tried to keep my japanese traditions too," you smiled at him.

You watched a movie and shared silly comments in between. The sun was going down when it ended.

"Do you want to order a pizza?" he asked.

"Yeah, that'd be cool," you agreed.

This is it. Now or never.

"Can I talk to you about something? When you finish the call," you said and he nodded.

He grabbed his phone and walked to the fridge to get the number from his favorite pizza shop. Just before he dialed, the doorbell rang. He walked to the door and gasped after he opened it.

"Akaashi!" he sounded happy.

You leaned back to look at the door and saw something that maybe you shouldn't have seen. They were kissing. It was quick and innocent but it was a kiss. You looked at the tv again.

"Y/n is here!" Bokuto said and they were walking inside. "I told you about them, remember?"

"Yes and you texted me about them too," Akaashi softly laughed. He had luggage with him and he left it by the door.

"Y/n, he's Akaashi Keiji. Do you remember him? He was in first year, you met him before you left," Koutaro introduced you.

"Yes, I do, you were Bokuto's teammate! It's nice to see you, Akaashi-kun," you smiled.

"Nice to see you're back, y/n-san. Bokuto told me that you happened to meet at a party, that's a huge coincidence. It sounds like fate."

"I was about to order pizza, did you eat something?" Bokuto asked from the kitchen.

"No but pizza sounds good," he smiled. Then he disappeared inside Bokuto's room.

Fate. Yeah, it was laughing at your expense.

"He looks tired, maybe I should go," you said when you heard the shower.

"It's ok, you can stay!" Bokuto turned around to look at you. "Are you ok, y/n?" he saw your weird expression.

"I have to go, sorry," you grabbed your stuff and walked to the door.

He followed you outside after he told Akaashi he was going out for a second.

"What's wrong?" he asked again.

"I… I'm sorry. I didn't know…" you struggled to explain.

"Is this about Akaashi?"

"No- uhm, well, not exactly. It doesn't matter," you were standing at the entrance of his little house.

"I'm sorry. I should've told you…" he figured out by himself. "We don't… we can't make it super public, he's a writer and his agent…"

"No, it's fine, you don't have to explain. I never asked," you laughed. "Akaashi is a perfect fit for you."

"Yeah, he's… awesome. You're awesome too, I mean it," he hugged you.

"Thanks, Bokuto. And I'm happy for you."

You separated from him and smiled.

"Text me when you have a free day, I'll invite you both to eat," you kissed his cheek. "See you later."

-

You went to Sakura's apartment that night. After a bottle of wine, you were able to tell her what happened.

"His partner was on a trip. And then… they arrived with me there. And I was about to… I was gonna tell Bokuto maybe I never got over him… and then he was kissing someone…"

"I'm sorry, I was the one that told you to go for it," Sakura felt guilty.

"Nah, that's fine. I… it's been 10 fucking years, there's no way he wouldn't have someone. He's the perfect guy," you laughed.

"Ok, so... There's this guy. Shouyou's teammate…"

"I don't know if I'm interested…"

"Atsumu, that's his name. Shou told me he asked about you the other day, he wants your number."

"Well, tell Hinata that he can give Atsumu my number," you agreed.

"Just have some fun and you'll get over it. Besides, he's still your friend, right?"

"Yeah, he is."

[homogrimoire-archive]

The Wild Dreams of Despair

As Hazel was drowning his sorrows in a bottle, Qrow just so happened to be around doing the same. They get to talking, and decide to run away from their lives, just for a moment. In that time, wish to have comfort with one another.

AO3 Link

Hazel looked up to see who dared to bother him. Couldn't they see he was moping, nursing a cup of something alcoholic that was best enjoyed alone? Upon seeing who it was, he tensed up, ready to fight. But the other man's expression, the way he swayed, his body language, it all conveyed he was on the same boat, and not looking for a fight either..

Hazel lowered his head and went black to staring at his glass as Qrow took a seat across from him in the bar's corner booth. It was fine by him. He didn't have the desire to care that an enemy was sitting across from him at the moment. His semblance had been slipping up lately, letting him feel things he wasn't sure how to deal with. Trying to drown it away felt appropriate. Let there be numbness once more, as there should be.

"You ever get tired of all this?' Qrow questioned. Hazel let out a sigh.

"… Yeah."

"We've all lost so much. Why can't it end already?"

"Why do we have to go on?" Hazel added and took another sip of his drink, offering it to Qrow after. He obliged, and took a gulp. With a satisfied "ahhh," he handed it back to Hazel.

"Good choice." he complimented.

"So I've heard. Supposed to burn a lot going down."

"No pain though, huh?"

"It's easy to feel nothing."

"Even if it feels wrong." Qrow laughed bitterly.

Silence followed for the next few peaceful moments, a simple quiet. Hazel lost himself in his drink as Qrow did the same. Even if this was his enemy, there was a comfort in being not alone with someone similar. It was perhaps a moment of weakness brought on by drunkenness.

"Life hates us, doesn't it?" Hazel said, breaking the silence.

"Be hard to say otherwise." Qrow reasoned.

"If I could turn back time, I would have run away from that school like we did from our parents."

"I would have followed Summer like I knew I should have. There's about a thousand more things I'd have done.."

"At the very least, you have some family to live for. Should appreciate it more." Hazel advised.

"If only I could." Qrow drawled. "Only another thing to lose and hurt."

Hazel could understand the logic. Suppose Gretchen had children, and then she died. Fear would consume him in wake and sleep, for them and what could happen to them in this terrible world. He could imagine how it was for someone with a semblance like Qrow's.

"No one ever gets what they want, huh?"

"I don't think we'll ever get what we want." Qrow responded, taking a long swig of his drink and ordering another round for him and Hazel.

"And like fools, we still try." Hazel said. A few shot glasses arrived, and Qrow picked one up and held it out for a toast.

"To an unfortunate life full of pain." he quietly said. Hazel picked up a glass and clinked it against Qrow's, the two of them downing their glass after.

Qrow was comfortable to mope about the past in silence as well. So many wonderful things that could have been, snatched away by the cruelty of fate. He at least had something to live for, something that could so easily be taken away. He wanted to forget that, forget how the tribe treated him, how Raven betrayed them, the pain of Summer dying, the pain of simple existence.

"How do you do it?" Qrow wondered.

"Do what?"

"Go on."

"Sometimes, I don't know." Hazel answered after a moment. He didn't need the moment to think about the answer, just for his drunken mind to process the question. "All I have now is hate. It's a fire. And like all fires, it will burn out someday."

"And when it does?"

"Don't know."

He really didn't know. He didn't know who he was without Gretchen. He didn't know who he would be without his hate and the desire for revenge that fueled it. He wasn't entirely sure who he was. There was nothing in the world for him to love, and nothing in the world to love him either. Not anymore.

"We deserve this, don't we?" Hazel wondered. Qrow nodded his head in agreement as he lazily swirled the ice in a half drunk glass of whiskey.

Hazel took a drink from one of the glasses Qrow had ordered, filled with the stuff he was drinking earlier. He set it down, and stared into it, his distorted reflection barely noticeable in the dimly lit bar. He had tasted it earlier out of curiosity after downing about six of those, and found that it was indeed something that was not meant to be slowly savored.

"Do you… ever think about running away from it all?"

"Heh. Done that a few times. No one ever noticed. But I aaalways kept coming back." he sadly informed the colossal man across from him. "Always… always… always…" he dejectedly repeated.

"Tonight… just tonight, the two of us should run from everything, together. I don't want to be alone for once, even if it's for a moment." Hazel could feel an intense feeling of loneliness and sadness that would make one cry. However, his semblance wouldn't let him cry just because of mere painful misery.

"I don't want to be alone either."

They finished their drinks, Qrow got up, and Hazel followed. Hand in hand, like that of former selves in a distant past, they walked through the city in quiet. The setting's sights and sounds passed by. A bright tower that displayed the city's name, a church whose bell rolled as they passed, an empty parking lot as the sun set. Out of sight, out of earshot, out of mind.

Qrow had since begun to lean against Hazel, his mind solely focused on getting to his motel room. It did not bear the excitement and anticipation that once filled him when they snuck into his dorm when his teammates were out on a date. The only thing he felt now was an old, lingering sadness.

Hazel felt similar. His life was also a sad, unfortunate thing. Innocent and simple things such as the giddiness of spending time alone with the guy he loved were long gone, taken by time for one reason or another.

Even with this, there was comfort in knowing they could still bring some comfort to the man they once loved. They could at least give each other a simple solace in a time of pain: to not feel alone. They may be enemies on opposing sides of an ancient, ongoing war, they were still only human.

Qrow unlocked the door to his motel room, Hazel following behind him.

"I'm gonna shower. Wanna join?" Qrow asked, this time with the sultry tone he had used many times before.

Hazel agreed. Back to back, they undressed themselves. Earlier, Qrow cursed having to pay extra for the larger room with a larger bathroom since it was the last one. At least that ended up working out.

Qrow finished undressing first, and fiddled with the shower to get the water running hot, as they both liked it. Hazel joined soon after. Yes, perhaps they could have showered separately, but then they would have been alone. Besides it was nice to have someone wash your hair and help scrub your back.

It was something Qrow and Hazel had done before together, and something that had missed more than they realized. The feeling of touching the man they loved, without ulterior, sexual motive, of helping with something so simple yet so private, the unexplainable warmth of it all. This act of intimacy and its accompanying emotions were another thing lost to time, only happening now as something to lose again.

Eventually, they finished showering and dried up, moving to the room's queen sized bed. It was late now, so they laid next to each other, Hazel curled up against Qrow. How they both missed such a closeness. Knowing this was fleeting made regret and sadness swell. But, for now, they had each other once more. Hazel embraced Qrow tighter, and Qrow did the same.

Why us? What did we ever do to deserve this suffering?

[missmonsters2]

Under the Light

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Fem!Reader/OFC

Prompt Request: @marvelouschloe 💕& Anonymous - 3: I’m sorry, I am so sorry. - 4: Do you have any idea what this feels like? - 13: We’re falling apart, and you don’t even care! - 17: I want you to say anything! Scream! Yell at me! Just something to show you fucking care.

Notes: Thanks for sending these in babes! I hope you don’t mind that I combined these since they’re all so the same/similar. So, I really sat here thinking about how I could make this hurt. I’m in pain. P.S. I love Wanda. That is all.

Warnings: Have you ever been stabbed in the gut before? Ok, well now you have. With words.

милый/milyj - Darling

Count: 3017

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People say that you can always see when the end is beginning.

And you could. You could pinpoint exactly where in your relationship that everything began to spiral downwards. 

The beginning was that you had met Wanda in a bar. 

You were two broken people trying to find love in each other.

And you did.

She was in so much pain from losing her brother, and you were just so broken from the start. You’ve only ever had one person in your life. The two of you were just two misfits trying to beat the system. You had no parents, no family, just her.

Until you met Wanda.

Wanda saw something in you, and you made a home in her. 

It didn’t bother you that she was gone a lot of the time, busy saving the world because she always came home to you. 

The way she would enter your apartment into your bedroom, shedding her clothes off as she slinked into bed, fingers softly holding you as she buried her head into your chest. 

“I love you,” she would whisper as if she was scared to say it because everything Wanda’s ever loved has left her. 

You would drag her fingers that were covered in rings, kissing her fingertips softly because she was everything to you. 

“Always,” you would tell her in return. That would comfort her more than saying ‘I love you.’

It was working, you thought. 

The both of you were so, so broken, but you could love each other without leaving scars. 

The best part was that you didn’t feel broken with her. You felt like a normal human being, just trying to make the best of everything.

You think you made her feel like that too.

You were fine. 

But then she wasn’t there when you needed her most. 

It happened so fast. The car you were in was spinning over and over, glass shattering everywhere.

You couldn’t feel your legs. 

When you woke up in the fire, you were trying to wake your best friend, but no matter how much you screamed, she didn’t respond. 

A stupid drunk driver t-boning the car you were in with your best friend. 

You made it.

She didn’t. 

Wanda wasn’t there, but you weren’t upset because she was saving the world. She would return to you. She would tell you she loved you, so you could tell her ‘always’. 

That’s how you made it through the five months until she came home.

By then, your injuries had healed up quite nicely. You were in physiotherapy to help you walk again. It was grueling and painful. 

The first time you had screamed and cried because your legs weren’t working.

You cried for many weeks.

But you persevered, pushing through the pain and grief.

You didn’t want Wanda to worry. You were going to walk and show her that you were still capable of being her home.

Because you love her and Wanda is the only good thing left in your life.

The day she returned, and you were waiting for her to come to see you. Wanda always came back to you first when she was back from her missions. 

It was really late at night, and you were tired, but you couldn’t wait to see her.

You still had a slight limp when you walked, your physiotherapist giving you a cane to help you walk around. It was way better than the crutches you had to use a couple weeks before. 

You could hear a vehicle approaching. You got up, limping slightly over to the open window as you peered through the curtains.

It was your girlfriend.

You smiled. You were about to call out to her, but someone else stepped out of the vehicle as well.

It was Vision, you think his name was. 

You hadn’t met him too many times before. 

He looked human, and that was new, but you still recognized him. It looked like he was dropping her off.

No big deal.

Until he leaned in and Wanda was using her power on his stone, his hand on her arm intimately. 

Usually, this would’ve been nothing. They’re teammates, they can bond in different ways you can’t with Wanda.

You’re not part of that part in her life.

You weren’t a superhero. 

And you were okay with that.

But it was the expression on her face.

The peace, the awe, that settled over her. There was a type of smile and light laughter that she let out that you’ve never experienced before.

It made you swallow. 

Wanda had never been like that with you. You were two broken people together, that’s what made it work.

But...that didn’t look like the case anymore. 

You quickly put away your cane, lying in bed, so Wanda came in, you just looked normal.

You couldn’t let her know that you were more broken than when she left.

You just couldn’t.

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It was getting worse. 

That’s the shitty part about being able to pinpoint when things are starting to go crumble. You begin to notice every tiny detail, over-reading everything. 

The fewer visits. 

The distant looks.

The lack of sex.

You could no longer relate her. 

She still said she loved you, but it didn’t feel the same. It was bringing an awful pit to your stomach. 

Wanda hadn’t even noticed that there was something wrong with you. That you had been broken physically, that your best friend no longer came around. 

You didn’t know how to bring it up. It was piling up higher and higher, and you were too scared to break down in front of Wanda.

Because it was clear she was no longer broken like you. 

And you didn’t want her to know that.

It made you look at yourself. You couldn’t help it, how disgusted you were with yourself. You were so desperate to fix yourself.

That’s how you could keep Wanda; otherwise, you were going to be left behind.

The crippling fear was making everything worse between the two of you.

The thing about bottling everything up higher and higher is that it tends to spill over as you’re desperate to keep it all in. There comes a point that you’re no longer struggling to keep your head afloat.

You’ll drown and accept it. 

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷

You lost count of how many weeks it’s been since you’ve seen Wanda. 

She kept saying that she’s busy, but maybe that’s code that she doesn’t want to spend time with you.

Why spend time with you when she can with Vision?

You wondered if she was just reminded about how broken she was before, how broken her past is when she looks at you. 

You were a mess. 

You stopped physiotherapy.

You slept the day away, no longer answering your phone. Every single night, you were at the bar, drinking your life away and dancing.

What’s the point? 

No one was checking up on you anymore. No one was looking for you. 

You were leaning against a brick wall, smoking a cigarette by your lonesome. The drinking no longer appealed to you, so you picked smoking instead. It gave you a new high. 

“Hey, baby, you all alone out here?” A buff drunk man stumbled out the back door as he spotted you.

You didn’t answer. 

“Hey, I’m talking to you!” He belligerently said in your face. 

His vodka breath was disgusting you. You pushed him roughly back, and he stumbled before catching his footing.

“You stupid bitch, what the hell!” He slurred, coming right back for you. 

You didn’t move. It wasn’t like you could get away fast enough. 

The blow never came. 

The next thing you knew, he was on the ground with Natasha over his body. She was twisting his arm painfully behind his back.

“We don’t hit girls, do we?” She seethed at him. He whimpered out his response, begging her to let go. Natasha twisted his arm just a tad harder before she let go.

She was grabbing your hand as she dragged you out. On the corner of the street across from the park, she whipped around, furious at you.

“Why haven’t you been answering Wanda’s calls?” She asked before she caught sight of your cigarette. 

She grabbed the offending item from your fingertips, making a disgusted noise before she put it out.

“What the hell has been wrong with you?” She asked, and you can’t help but laugh.

“That’s the million-dollar question, isn’t it?” You drily say. “Thanks for saving me from being punched in the face, I wouldn’t have been able to hobble away fast enough.”

You turn around, and it’s the first that Natasha catches the limp in your walk. 

“Oh, no,” Natasha says as she stops you from leaving. “Whatever this is, it’s done. I’m taking you to Wanda right now.”

You make a sound of protest, but there’s not much you can do.

After all, Black Widow has you in her grasp. 

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷

Everyone at the compound is still awake when Natasha drags you there. Wanda is sitting next to Vision, and the sight of it makes you sick to your stomach.

When she notices you, she immediately hops up, walking over to you hurriedly with worry. 

She immediately smells the smoke and alcohol on you, and she looks thoroughly disappointed.

It makes you feel worse about yourself, but you push it away.

It doesn’t matter anymore. 

“Where have you been? I’ve been searching for you every single night.”

You merely shrug. 

“милый, please talk to me,” she begs you. 

“Are you...okay?” Bruce speaks up from the back and you tense. Everyone is looking at him, and Wanda whips her head back at you, trying to inspect if you have any injuries.

Bruce is eyeing you, and you wish he just wouldn’t before he speaks up again, “You’re standing unevenly. You’re putting all the pressure onto one leg, while slanted. It’s an indicator there’s something wrong with your spine.”

Wanda looks alarmed while Natasha is staring at your back. Natasha steps forward, lifting your shirt up intrusively while you yelp.

“Hey!” You object, but it’s too late. 

She revealed the angry gash that has scarred over your lower back, disappearing into your pants. 

Wanda lets out a horrid gasp as she sees it, putting her hand over her mouth as she looks at the wound.

“милый...what...what happened. When did this happen? Who did this to you?”

You grasp your shirt back down, glaring at Natasha as you did, but she looks angry herself. 

“It’s nothing,” you mumbled.

“Don’t lie to me!” Wanda angrily says to you.

“Who the hell cares what happened!” You yell back at her. “You haven’t noticed since you came back, why does it matter now?”

Wanda is stunned. 

You look around the room, everyone is uncomfortable as you fight with Wanda, and you’re about to turn around to leave, but Wanda grabs your hands instead. She pulls you gently to her room and shuts the door behind you.

You walk past her over to her bed, and Wanda notices your limp.

“Take your clothes off,” she demands. 

You turn around, eyebrows scrunched together.

“What?”

“Take. Your. Clothes. Off.” Wanda demands more slowly this time.

“No, what the fuck,” You tell her. You’re not about to strip before her.

“I need to see the injuries,” Wanda tells you, and she comes towards you, hand-stretched out to tug at your shirt, but you quickly slap it away.

“You don’t need to pretend you care now, it’s fine. Can I go home?” You quickly try to walk past her again, but she blocks the door.

Wanda is shocked at your tone and attitude.

“What the hell are you talking about? Of course, I care! I’m your girlfriend.”

“Are you?” You ask, unable to help the hurt tone that bleeds into your voice. 

Wanda furrows her brow as she crosses her arms.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

It was the overfilled bottled up emotions, threatening to make it’s presence now that you were in front of Wanda.

The weeks of trying to keep everything together while you clearly couldn’t alone. It was bursting at the seams and you let it explode. 

“It means you’re too busy moving on with Vision to notice anything about me!” You huffed.

Wanda shirks back, and she’s defensive. She opens her mouth to say something, but you’re not finished. 

“It means that I got t-boned 6 months ago and I made it, but my best friend didn’t,” You say, your throat feeling raw as the hot feeling in the back of your eyes creeps up.

“It means that even though I was all alone and I couldn’t fucking walk, I had to plan her funeral because I was all she had. Do you know how hard that was?” The tears are coming swiftly now, like the dam that broke open. 

“It means that even though the only person that was like family to me is dead, I still felt like everything was okay because I thought I had you. So, every fucking day I got up, pushed myself through the pain and grief at physiotherapy so I could walk to you when you came back.”

You choke on your tears because the image of her peaceful face when she’s with Vision pops in your head.

“And even though I’m suffering inside and everything is slipping through my fingers, you haven’t even noticed! I can’t talk to you without you obviously thinking that you’d rather be somewhere else, with someone else.”

You’re openly crying now, hands to your face as your shoulders shake uncontrollably.

You’re falling apart, right in front of Wanda. 

It’s your worst nightmare.

“It means that we’re falling apart and you don’t even care!”

The news is hit Wanda like a ton of bricks. God, how could she not notice any of that? At the same time, the guilt overfloods her.

She immediately crowds around you, holding you in her arms tightly.

“I’m sorry, I am so sorry, милый,” she whispers into your hair, eyes watering because you were hurting so much, and she hadn’t noticed.

You push her away, folding your arms across your torso, a grimace on your lips.

“I don’t want your sorry,” you bitterly mutter as you turn around, facing away from her.

Wanda pinches her lips together as she lifts her hand but then retracts it back to her side, clenching it into a fist.

“What do you want me to say?” She asks you.

“I want you to say anything! Scream! Yell at me! Just something to show you fucking care!” You whip around her, screaming at her so loudly you’re sure everyone in the compound heard it.

“I want you to tell me that everything is still the same between us, that Vision isn’t who you’re turning to when you need someone now!” You’re begging, it’s so pathetic, but you don’t know what else you can do. 

She feels guilty. So guilty and Wanda doesn’t know how to make it better.

“It’s not like that between Vision and me,” Wanda tells you, but the image of her connecting with his stone won’t leave your mind. The way he held her intimately, and the way she looked...healed.

So, you don’t believe her. 

Because you’re still broken, you’re the only broken one. She was only yours when she was broken too. 

“I want you to tell me the truth,” you croak. 

There’s a momentary silence as Wanda watches more tears fall from your eyes.

“Admit it,” you say, chin trembling. “You’ve outgrown me.”

The words make Wanda stiff. 

The silence swallows you whole. 

Your eyes dull, arms sagging to your side. Everything feels raw, from your throat to your eyes. 

Your chest was heavy, and it felt like someone was squeezing your heart.

“Okay,” you say hollowly, giving in. “Okay.”

Walking past her, you open the door, limping your way out. 

The floor is empty, and you’re thankful because you don’t know how you could face this humiliation. 

You get all the way out the compound before Wanda calls your name as she chased after you, grabbing your wrist once more. 

She spins you around, and there are tears in her eyes. 

“Wait, please, just--please, милый.”

Wanda’s stammering, she doesn’t have anything she wants to say put together. 

She doesn’t even know what she wants to say. 

You chuckle humorlessly. The sound is so empty that it scares Wanda. 

”Do you have any idea what this feels like?” You cry silently, tears falling slowly.

“I’m desperately trying to keep myself together, keep the pieces from falling so I can keep you, but it’s not enough, is it?”

You slowly pull your arm out of Wanda’s grasp. You look at her and fuck, why can’t you be enough?

You love her so much, you were trying your best, why wasn’t that enough? You had spent so many nights praying to God, even though you didn’t believe in him, asking him if you could just stay with Wanda.

You were losing everything. 

You lost your best friend.

You were losing your home.

You were losing Wanda. 

“Congratulations,” you tell her with a half-smile. “I’m glad you found someone who can make you feel not broken, can give you peace. I’m sorry that wasn’t me.”

You turn and walk away, each step hurting and sending a shooting pain in your spine, but you refuse to let Wanda see that. 

The worst part was that you knew no matter how much time passed by, you were always going to love her because you had really meant always.

And that terrified the hell out of you.

The emptiness settles over you as you walk away. 

People say that you can always see when the end is beginning.

But they don’t tell you how much it hurts to watch as everything falls apart and be able to do nothing about it. 

They don’t tell you that broken people can’t keep things that they can’t have, even if you try to love them with all the pieces.

PART II: You Found Me

[whatshockey]

if you ever want to be in love - n.p.

in which a girl who vowed to never fall for her best friend did exactly that

song used for inspiration: “if you ever want to be in love” by james bay

warnings: mentions of alcohol. a bit of cursing towards the end. a bit angsty?

word count: 4,093 

a/n: this is my first time ever writing something so please help me out lol i’m sorry it’s so long

She found home in another set of arms, stretched and surrounding her in familiarity and comfort she had yet to find in the foreign city. Cold fingers danced along her spine, somehow managing to leave her skin scorching, and she wondered if he could also hear how loud and fast her heart was pulsing his name.

The touches were innocent, alongside the gazes she shared with eyes that mirrored the color of the lake where the two spent past summers together. She never dared to sneak glances at the lips that mocked and called her by her childhood nickname, or risk being caught indulging in a daydream starring him in the lead role. No matter how strong her emotions grew for the boy whose torso laid pressed up against her, she continued to sweep them under the rug and attend these friendly playdates that left her stomach uneasy. And the various junk food splattered on the coffee table before them had very little to do with it.

No one warned her about how easy it was to fall for your best friend, but at the same time it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to tell you that it would happen, especially when your best friend is as attractive as her’s. The same one that made her cry when he broke her green crayon in kindergarten, and the same one who got in a fist fight in the seventh grade after one of the older boys spread rumors about her. He’d seen her when she had lost her first tooth and when she finally got her braces off and could properly smile at one of his cheesy jokes. She’d seen his face twist when he broke his hand for the first time and he’d held her‘s when she was stood up by the cute soccer player from the rival school. They’d been through it all, but now she wants all of him, and she couldn’t feel more embarrassed and selfish for that.

The movie in front of them flashed to the credits and he straightened to turn the TV off, only to notice she hadn’t realized the movie had ended and instead focused on picking at her nail polish. He brought his hand flat against her lower back and gently rubbed small circles, hoping to grant him her attention. When her eyes bolted to his with pupils floating in a cocktail of shock and confusion, his eyebrows furrowed in response.

“What’s up? Everything okay?”

Her head shook yes before he could finish his question, and even she knew that he could tell she was lying. But he wasn’t one to press.

“Yeah, I’m good.” She quickly replied, turning her head back to the monitor only to see the screen tinted black.

“Movie was that boring, eh?”

He nudged her jokingly, and she was suddenly aware of how warm she felt under it. Her cheeks warmed, the corners of her lips curled, and she could feel him still looking her with a burning stare. Itching to separate herself from him, she began to stretch and stand up, ignoring the clench in her gut as she did so.

“I get to pick next time.”

She found it easier to look back at him now, sending him a tight-lipped smile and occupied herself with packing her textbooks up. She caught him rolling his eyes with a small curl on his own lips as he watched her. He had promised to help her study for her exams in attempt to convince her to come over after his two week long roadtrip with the team, and she was glad he didn’t know how she wouldn’t have hesitated to see him in the first place. He handed her a folder overflowing with neat notes and printed papers, and at the sight someone might wonder how she managed to have time to sacrifice for a movie. She’d always make time for him.

Two days later she found herself cheering for her best friend in the company of what felt like the entire population of Philadelphia. She watched him toss a puck to a little girl who wore a matching jersey to his, and her mind drifted to the countless times she wore his last name on her back and he sent a puck her way. She could still feel his mother’s hands clasped in her own in close games, as well as his arms lifting her when she showed him an acceptance letter from the University of Pennsylvania, allowing them to continue to be with each other in every step of the way. It was only convenient that his dream of the NHL and her dream school had led both of them to the same city.

He had insisted that she stay in the family and friends suite, not knowing that she  felt far from it. Most, if not all, of the girls in there were in some sort of romantic relationship with one of his teammates. Regardless, she agreed to go, but only so she could see him smile in return. 

“You’re Nolan’s girlfriend, right?” were the words directed to her when she had first watched from the suite during his debut season.

“Uh no,” she stammered, chuckling a bit to cover up the fact that her heart threatening to jump out from behind her black sweater. “Just his friend.”

At first she wondered if they then thought she was just a random girl he’d casually been seeing, or if the looks she received afterwards were made out of pity. However, that became a phrase she had grown used to repeating even as she eventually grew closer to the girls. The two never stopped defending their relationship with each other and denying anything more, as it slowly became second nature once someone began making assumptions. But who could blame them? Through the various Instagram posts posing as each other’s dates to weddings and blogs gossiping about this so-called mystery girl, both their group of friends from back home and Philly were waiting for the day the two became official. 

“So you’re telling me you guys never hooked up?”

She rolled her eyes, letting out a dramatic sigh and took a large swig of the bitter liquor she held in her hand, gagging as the cool liquid rushed down her throat.

“No, Travis.”

He responded with a strangled noise, eyes blown wide and nearly choked on his bottle of beer. 

“Not even a kiss?”

The two remained tucked against a wall of the house party, with TK originally sauntering over with a “You need to relax!” in attempts to coerce her to join him and dance, just after two guys before him did the same.  

She lazily lifted her gaze from her plastic cup to the crowd swaying to the bass shaking the floor beneath them, and could briefly feel his muscular chest pressed against her back and his hands lingering on the swell of her hips. It had been the first weekend of their senior year in high school, and their friends and friends of friends had been packed into the basement of one of their classmate’s homes. The two hadn’t really spoken since their sophomore year, growing apart into different friend groups as he became more popular with the cheerleaders and she went away to be a camp counselor for the summer, the two becoming worse at responding to messages as the weather got warmer. But they had been drinking far too much that night, and their tolerance levels were significantly lower than they were now. And she could fill her shirts out more, and his shoulders only seemed to broaden. Yet the way he had snaked his arms around her waist and bent down to murmur a compliment on her new bodysuit that she asked his opinion on before purchasing resembled the confidence only a grown man could have. And she was falling harder than she thought was possible.

The duo had walked home together that night, with her in his hoodie and him holding her from falling over. Knowing her parents like his own, he avoided taking her home in such a state, and instead opted to tread to his house as his parents were away for the weekend.

He had just unlocked the door before hearing her gasp amongst, heightening the buzz of chirping crickets in the otherwise silent night air. 

“A shooting star!” she cried, excitedly pointing and feet bouncing like a young child. He went to shush her in attempts to keep their neighbors from waking up, but she pouted before he had the chance to.

“You missed it.”

He shook his head and chuckled, shutting the door behind him and moving to wrap his arms around her. 

“Wanna go to our spot?” 

And she agreed, allowing him to help her onto his roof just like he did so many times before. They had started this tradition in middle school when Nolan first began getting noticed for his athletic abilities, and would stay up there until curfew passed and her mother called his asking where she was.

“You don’t need to worry about me, Nol. I would’ve been fine,” she assured him, snuggling further into his chest when he told her he wanted to make sure she got home safe. “You could’ve finally brought home a girl tonight.” 

His hand squeezed her side, and she could feel him turn to look at her but she kept her eyes on the stars blanketing them.

“But I only want to hang out with you.”

She wish that were the case now, because her best friend stook out like a sore thumb in the midst of the house party. He could be seen across the room chatting up a girl with much smoother hair and a brighter smile than she ever could possess. Their lips hung dangerously close to each other, and his gaze raked over the girl’s body in a way she had never recognized before. She couldn’t shake the image of Nolan’s so close to her’s that night on the roof, as there was no telling how the story would’ve concluded had he not ended up holding her hair back as she threw up all of the contents in her stomach. If only she drank enough so that she couldn’t recall that night.

Turning back to Travis who held a flicker in his eye, knowing she spotted her best friend turning himself into a pair with yet another girl who was not her, she let out a sigh and grabbed his hand that remained outstretched.

“Does the offer still stand?”

Let’s do something Wednesday.

The text had been simple, and served as the only form of communication exchanged between them since they’d separated at the party over the weekend. Tucking her notebook under her arm, she sped out of the lecture hall, fumbling to type out a message, quickly pulling up her calendar to make sure she didn’t schedule her group project meeting that night. Her shoulders tensed as she felt an impact, her eyes leaving her screen to find an unfamiliar broad chest.

“Oops,” she piped, bending her knees to pick up her notebook she managed to drop in the process, yet the stranger had already beat her to it. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be. It was my fault.” 

A deep voice, just not quite as deep as Nolan’s, enveloped her eardrums, and she found herself swimming in silk as his lips continued to move. 

“Wouldn’t want you to lose that.”  

His hand grazed her own as he handed her notebook back, touch lingering for a bit too long to make her feel comfortable, causing her cheeks to flush out of instinct.

She thanked him and he smiled with teeth bright and nearly perfect, holding the door open and leaving her to respond to her best friend who’d cause her phone to buzz a second time.

I’ll pick you up for lunch?

Sounds good she replied, shaking the feeling the boy had left her with as her best friend’s image clouded over her mind. 

Just two days later, she walked into the same lecture hall, earphones in and a black flyers hat resting on her head. Dropping her bag onto the space next to her, she rubbed her eyes as she impatiently waited for the lecture to begin, not bothering to take out her notes to follow along. Her project meeting had lasted for two more hours longer than intended, and no one seemed to agree on anything. And listening to her professional rattle on at 8:00am the following morning had been the last thing she wanted to do.

She could feel a presence next to her followed by a light tap on her shoulder, forcing her to irritably remove an earphone before turning around. She was greeted with a familiar smile, undoubtedly handsome and this time small dimples appearing to frame full lips. And the same silky voice who held the door open for her days before and spoken again.

“Is anyone sitting here?” 

She shook her head no, hastily moving her stuff away and struggled to suppress a yawn in the process, earning a chuckle from the stranger. 

“Long night I take it?”

This time she smiled back, adjusting the hat on her head and chewed on the inside of her cheek. 

“Yeah, absolutely.”

The boy kept a steady conversation throughout the lecture, hushed and calculated, but definitely caught her blushing more than once throughout their exchange. He held the door open yet again, this time walking out of the building with her to continue talking to her about the boring topic of today’s class discussion. Her eyes left his, know squinting from laughing at a joke they had shared together, and recognized the Jeep pulling around the corner. Before she could excuse herself, he asked for her number, offering to send her the mediocre notes he managed to scribble down than she had been too tired to take. She was charmed and agreed, taking his phone from his hands.

Bidding her new friend goodbye, she climbed into the passenger seat, earning a brisk greeting from the player driving. 

“Who was that?” 

He was referring to the new face she was with just a minute ago.

“Someone from class.”

She heard him grumble something, acknowledging that he heard her, but went unknowing what else had been going through his mind. After knowing him for so long, she could usually decipher exactly what he was feeling. This time his expression went unreadable. But before she could ask him that or how his morning practice went, he reached his hand from across her seat to the radio, increasing the volume of the music and drowning out any questions that remained floating in her mind.

The boy had texted her multiple times for the remainder of that week, at first with questions about the homework that slowly evolved into lengthy conversations about each other’s lives outside of the class. She had soon learned he was heavily involved in his fraternity, and had aspirations of eventually attending law school. But it proved difficult to avoid the fact that the conversations had grown increasingly flirtatious, and she could feel her best friend’s stare on her as he watched her jump to respond to a message whenever she was with him.

It didn’t take long for the two to meet up outside of class. With midterms quickly approaching, they intended to study with each other, and that had been the excuse she used when telling her best friend she couldn’t make it to their plans.

“So sorry, Nol. I’ve just got so much work to do. I’ll see you at the game?” 

Maybe meeting the boy from her class was a sign that she needed to stop pining after her best friend, someone she was definitely not meant to be with. And she could not shake the image of Nolan flirting with the girl at the party and responding the infinite DMs he receives on Instagram from her mind. Besides, it wasn’t every day a cute boy paid attention to her. 

But he wasn’t stupid. And she knew this. She’d always make time for him before, and as a perfectionist herself, she rarely struggled to keep up with her work anyways. She could tell he would quickly catch onto her hesitation in bringing him up in discussion, and especially when small things that reminded her of him made her smile and she couldn’t help but share.

He never said anything to her until one day, with his phone illuminated with her face, she once again began to come up with an excuse not to see him.

“You’re always blowing me off,” he said it lightheartedly, but she could tell it hurt him. “Got me watching shitty movies with TK now.”

She nearly winced, but forced a smile anyways.

“I bet he’s great at cuddling.”

She could hear Nolan snort and could see him sit up straighter in the frame. 

“He misses you. You’re still coming tomorrow, right?”

A few curses left her mouth, completely forgetting that a few of the guys were getting together for a small get together. She’d already made plans with the boy from class, and began telling this to Nolan.

“But you don’t have any exams left.” 

She sighed, not really knowing what to say. 

“Yeah, but I still have classes.”

His frustration didn’t go unseen, and she could tell he was growing more irritable by the second. If it wasn’t clear that she’d been the one pushing them away from each other, this was the proof. And it rang loud for the both of them.

“Bring him too.”

“I-What?”

Shocks could be felt coursing throughout her body, nearly causing her to drop her phone as she walked to her next class.

“Yeah, I wanna meet him.”

After struggling to find a reason why she couldn’t do just that, she finally agreed, texting him to notify him of his extended invitation, which she prayed he’d turn down.

What she didn’t know, however, was that the boy was a hockey fan. A huge hockey fan. And when she told him about her friends after he inquired, he hadn’t stopped talking about them since. This time he was talking about their game last week.

“Did you see Konecny’s assist in the last quarter? Man’s a beauty.”

Of course she’d seen it. She’d been at the stadium when it happened, and the one before that as well. It felt nearly impossible not to laugh at how excited and boyish he’d been acting since hearing the news, if it even counted as news. And she hoped her friends wouldn’t scare him away too much, or vice versa.

But thankfully, they all welcomed him with stretched arms. All except for one.

She hadn’t understood what caused Nolan to be in such a sour mood, or if she had any control over the situation to begin with. The moment she had arrived with the guest of honor to his apartment, he hadn’t uttered anything other than a “hey” and a nod in their general direction. 

From the outside, he came across as a lone wolf. Quiet and analytical, his deep eyes judged a scene in front of him with wisdom beyond his years. However, she knew well enough to know this wasn’t one of those cases. He could be seen scowling at anything the boy had said, even if it caused the rest of his friends to laugh. And he didn’t even try to hide it. 

The group had been engrossed in a lively conversation about who knows what, because the two best friends could be seen dazing off into their own worlds, with one sizing another up and the other watching him do so. 

“She never told me she knew you guys,” the boy mentioned, wrapping an arm around her shoulder as she bit her tongue to keep her form rolling her eyes at his remark.

“I guess it didn’t came up,” she shrugged, leaning into his touch. 

“So are you guys fucking or what?”

The room came to a halt when a piercing, deep voice grumbled out something that no one expected to hear, all eyes setting in on the centerman with his arms crossed, eyes challenging his newest guest that had his mouth hung open.

“What the fuck, Nolan?”

Her voice sounded strangled and upset, and he brought his lethargic gaze to set in on her, and shrugged as if he hadn’t said anything out of line. 

“You’ve never brought guys around.”

This only made her skin boil more. He’d been the one who told her to invite him, and he’d been the one who insisted on meeting him. 

“You out of everyone would know that girls and boys can be just friends.”

Nolan scoffed, and the mood quickly changed. The rest who watched the little exchange moved to get ready to leave, claiming that it was getting late and promised their girlfriends they’d be back soon. She stood up as well, veins throbbing in anger and ready to slam the door behind her as she left. However, she felt her wrist get caught be a grip she’s grown fairly accustomed to over the years.

“Talk to him.”

She knew he was right, being best friends with the two of them, even if she so badly wanted to punch everyone’s teeth in at the moment. Travis then gave her a squeeze for encouragement and whispered good luck.

The boy already knew what was coming, but nonetheless nodded understandably as she came up with an excuse as to why she had to stay back a little longer.

“I’m gonna help clean up if that’s cool?”

He gave her a hug with a quick peck on the cheek, the biggest form of affection he’d shown to her since they’d met. But she didn’t have time to dwell on that right now.

She had found Nolan perched on balcony of his apartment, and he could hear her soft footsteps padding towards him. The only sound shared between them were the opening of another beer, and the noises the city’s nightlife left below. She moved to sit next to him, shivering in cool night. If the tension hadn’t been so thick, she would’ve lifted his arm and tucked herself underneath. But instead opted to pull her sweater’s sleeves over the knuckles, kneeing bouncing to put her mind at ease.

“If you wanted to feel loved, I was always here.”

Neither of them had expected that the man of few words to be the first to break the silence. It was so quiet, but she could hear him. She had been rehearsing a speech in her head, making a point to tell him off for ruining what could’ve been something good for her. That his remark was uncalled for and stupid, and insinuated everything that was false. And how he had no reason to be upset, because this was all his doing. But instead, his words left her speechless, and her mind was now drawing a blank.

“Y’know I love you,” he continued, and she in fact did know. The duo always made sure to express how much they cared for each other, but that only came about maybe around a birthday or a holiday of sorts. “And if you needed more love, I could’ve given that to you.”

Her heart swelled at his words, and she worried that it would pop in her chest. Her throat felt dry, but her eyes wet. And she struggled to choke out a response.

“It’s not that simple, Nolan.” She kept shaking her head, picking at her nails now that her nail polish washed away. “It’s a different kind of love, and we’re never going to be able to feel that with each other.”

“Why not?” His chair scraped against the concrete, and her turned his body to face her. “I know that’s it’s a different kind of love. I know what kind of love it is. I’m just saying that if you want it, I can give it to you.”

He brought his hand to cup her face, her pupils wide with fear and vulnerability and he turned her to look directly at him. 

“Why won’t you just let me love you?”

And she couldn’t tell her who went for it first, except all she knew was that they were left feverishly kissing under a blanket of stars that shone slightly brighter this time, basking in each other’s warmth and content with calling each other home.

[angelicthor]

religion

pairing: thor odinson x reader

summary: set directly after Thor: Ragnarok (Infinity War? I don’t know her). You and Thor have always had a complicated relationship but when he comes to you years after disappearing telling you about the destruction of his home world, you’ll do just about anything to make him feel better.

warnings/genre: +18 only, smut, slight angst. 

masterlist

a/n: thor deserves all the love in the world. i said what i said. send tweet. 

Cause you’re my religion You’re how I’m living When all my friends say I should take some space Well I can’t envision, that for a minute When I’m down on my knees, you’re how I pray Hallelujah, I need your love

The hotel door shut behind you with a soft click and you placed your gun on the table beside your bed, the assignment was a success and you text Steve on your secure line to let him know, agreeing to meet up with him again tomorrow to head towards wherever you were needed next. The UN may have disbanded the avengers but that didn’t mean you weren’t still needed. People would always need protecting and there were things out there that police, militaries, and all the spy organisations in the world couldn’t combat.

You poured yourself a drink from the bottle of Jack stashed in your bag, stretching out the kinks in your back before you swallowed the bitter alcohol in one swig, recoiling slightly at the taste as your face contorted in disgust. Placing the empty tumbler on the side you advanced on the en-suite, carelessly leaving a trail of clothes behind you as you headed straight towards the shower, leaning against the bathroom countertop as you waited for the water to warm.

All things considered, you couldn’t really complain about your current setting; since you’d repudiated the accords you’d been forced to stay in much worse accommodation. You supposed it came with the territory of being a wanted criminal. At least in this hotel you got a window wall that let in natural light and opened onto a balcony overlooking the city. Yeah, you’d definitely been in worse places.

Stepping under the spray of the showerhead, you pressed your hand against the chipped tiles in front of you, bowing your head as you let the warm water wash away the stress of the day. Pushing your wet hair from your face, you finished your shower and reached for the towel on the rack before wrapping it around yourself and heading back into your room to retrieve your sleep shirt and shorts.

You furrowed your brows at the darkness of the room, you hadn’t bothered to leave a light on given that it was mid-summer and the sun was out in full force, not a cloud in the sky before you had entered the bathroom, but now the skies were a bleak grey, the sun nowhere to be seen and you could feel the beginning of a storm in the air.

Strange, you mused, you could have sworn the forecast was nothing but blazing sun for the next few weeks.

Deeming thoughts about the changing weather useless, you pushed them from your mind, drying yourself off and pulling the shirt over your head and shorts up your legs, hoping that the temperature didn’t drop with the lack of visible sun as they were all you had to sleep in. You had just pulled back the covers when the first strike of lightening hit, the powerful bright bolts of electricity splitting the grey sky apart, lighting up the room with its intensity before the rumbling roll of thunder shook the entire city.

The storm caused memories of days long gone to resurface in your mind. Memories you needed to forget. You couldn’t focus on them, not now, couldn’t focus on –

You needed to forget.

Unlike most in Berlin that night, the ruckus of the storm lulled you to sleep, the sound comforting and familiar providing you with the perfect ambiance for your well-earned rest, letting out a content sigh as your body melted into the mattress.

Some hours later, you jolted awake at a violent clap of thunder, disorientated as rain pelted against the glass, another fork of lightning splicing through the sky and lighting up your otherwise pitch-black room for only a moment. But it wasn’t that what awoke you. No, the all-too familiar feeling of someone’s stare burning into your body was what roused you from your sleep and you knew exactly who it was.

He was here.

Only his silhouette was visible against the bright flashes in the sky where he stood on the balcony, rain soaking him as he stood there unsure of himself. Heart-racing, uncertain as to why he was here but knowing that whatever happened must have been been bad, you slowly climbed from your bed, sliding the glass door open and stepping out into the cold night, clothes becoming drenched from the torrential downfall in mere seconds, but you didn’t even pay it any mind. Nothing else mattered now. He was back.

Your God of Thunder.

Your love.

Your Thor.

You had a complicated relationship with the Asgardian to say the least, never really knowing where either of you stood. Labels like teammate or friend would never be able to fully explain what Thor meant to you, you shared a bond far too deep and meaningful for such trivial categorisations. You were perfectly attuned to each other, both on and off the battlefield, you made a couple like no other, your biggest supporters when things went right and each other’s sanctuary when they did not. Your connection to Thor was unparalleled to anything you had every experienced in your life. But then he had to leave, trouble in other realms needed his attention and you didn’t know when – if he would return.

You wanted to go with him more than anything, but you were needed too much on earth, after Ultron it was too much of a risk for three of the avengers to disappear, and so you reluctantly stayed, heart aching as you came to a harsh truth: your fantasies of a life with Thor would remain entirely that – fantasies. He couldn’t leave the nine realms to fall into chaos, he couldn’t favour earth out of all them, regardless if he took his birth-right as king or not. That wasn’t in his nature. It was one of the reasons you loved him.

No, Thor’s place would always be with Asgard, protecting everyone in every realm. It had to be.

But he was here, face crestfallen and shoulders slumped forward in defeat, a sight even you had never seen on your thunderer before. You tentatively reached out to cup his face in your hand, noticing for the first time that the hair that was stuck down to his face was much shorter than when he left, his beard somewhat thicker than you remember but you gasped when you noticed the patch adorning his right eye, a jagged scar cutting through the soft skin of his cheek that resembled the very lightning he commanded.  

“Thor,” You whispered, fearing if you were any louder you may startle the man. Squeezing his eye shut, Thor nuzzled into your palm, his larger hand coming up to cover yours before he met your gaze, eye bloodshot with unshed tears as the dam finally broke, his face crumbling as the weight of everything he had been through came crashing down on him and he collapsed in your arms, shoulders shaking as sobs tore from his throat, hands clinging desperately to your form as you quickly wrapped your arms around him in a comforting embrace, leading him into your hotel room and placing him on your bed.

Thor opened his mouth to speak again but no words came out, staring straight ahead of him as if he was processing a great deal unaware of where he even was. You quickly darted into the bathroom, pulling a dry towel from the rail and hurried back to Thor who had remained motionless.

You slowly approached him, afraid of startling him out of his stupor and gently knelt in front of him. You dabbed the towel along his brow, pushing his hair back to stop any more water from dripping down his face before you took notice of his t-shirt and jeans that clung to him like a second skin. Frowning at his state of attire, you gently pulled his face down to focus on you, thumbs massaging his cheeks in feather-light circles.

“Thor, honey, you have to take your clothes off ok? You’re soaking wet.”  

He numbly nodded at your request but made no effort to move and so you did it for him, lifting the shirt off his body, and letting it fall to the floor with a thud, moving to undo his belt and slowly pull down his drenched jeans thankful when he lifted his bum of the bed to make it easier for you. You were thankful he had not worn his armour, knowing how difficult that would have been to remove, You pulled his shoes from his feet and placed them neatly together at the side of the bed, picking up his discarded clothes to dry in the bath, noticing the similar state of your own clothes and throwing them in there as well, leaving you naked before the God, not for the first time.

When you returned, Thor had the towel you had given him wrapped around his shoulders, clutching it tightly in his fists as more tears fell from his eye. Noticing you were back in the room, Thor quickly wiped his tears away and your heart twisted at the sight, he had to be strong for so many people but never for you – not like this.

“I went to the compound to try and find you, but no one was there.”

“The Avengers disbanded - it’s a long story, one that doesn’t matter to me right now,” You murmured, sitting beside Thor and tracing your fingers down his arm to try and relax him, “Thor what happened?”

“Asgard’s gone,” He choked out, burying his head in his hands as you gaped at him.

Asgard couldn’t be gone. That wasn’t possible. Was it?

“It-it was the only way we could defeat her, but it cost everything Y/N, everything.”

Thor told you everything about his sister who he hadn’t even known existed, the hidden history of his home and his father, how he’d died, and how Asgard really came to be, he told you of the prophecy – ragnarok – and how it came true, how his world, his home, was destroyed in fire and burnt to ashes, nothing remaining but the Asgardians on the ship that was currently cloaked and hovering over Norway.

You heart broke with every word he spoke; he’d been through so much, too much, and hadn’t been given a moment to process a moment of it. His pain and grief and anger all pouring from him as he finally unleashed what he had to keep restrained for so long.

Tugging on his hand, you turned him to face you, crawling up the bed to rest against the pillows, Thor automatically resting his head on your chest as he’d done many times before, his bulkier frame lying heavily on yours as he listened to the soothing thud of your heartbeat in his ear. Stroking your hands up and down his back, you worked out the knots and tension that were present in his muscles, nails lightly scratching the tanned skin as he wrapped his arms around your waist, holding you tightly to him.

The silence in the room was only disrupted by Thor’s ragged breaths and choked sobs until he mumbled something unintelligible where his head was buried in your chest, your hands stalling their ministrations on his back as you waited for him to repeat what he had said.

Lifting his head, Thor rested his chin on your chest as he stared up at you with bloodshot eyes, the sorrow and guilt he carried so visible in the lines of his face. “The Garden,” he repeated before elaborating, “My mother’s garden; it was the one place in all of Asgard that was entirely hers, it became her memorial after she passed and now – now it’s gone. Everything’s gone. The schools and sanatoriums and the palace and people’s homes, it’s all gone. I should have done more. I could have saved it, but I didn’t; I wasn’t strong enough.”

Thor shifted off you, sitting on the edge of the bed as he buried his head in his hands, gripping at the short strands of his hair. Try as you might you couldn’t understand his struggle. He’d been forced to do the impossible, watch his home, everything he had every known, be destroyed before his eyes because it was needed to be done.

So much had been torn from him and you didn’t know how to ease his pain.

Slowly you crawled behind him, kneeling on the bed as you wrapped your arms around his broad shoulders, littering kisses along his neck as you felt the taut muscles relax at the touch of your lips against his skin.

“You did what you had to do Thor, you saved your people and that’s what matters,” You pressed a kiss to his cheek as he lifted his head slightly to peak at you from the corner of his eye as you shifted to sit beside him. “You’re their prince and you did what a good prince should do, regardless of the cost, Asgard still lives in its people and that’s down to you love.”

Thor shot you a strained smile, cupping your face in his callused hand before he met your lips in a languid kiss, pouring his gratitude into the embrace, his tongue stroking into your mouth as he pulled you onto his lap. You pulled away, pressing a few gentle kisses to his lips as you rested your forehead against his, fingers carding through his short strands.

“They made me King,” He muttered against your lips and your actions stalled at the revelation.

You knew how big this was for him; Thor was destined to be King since he was born but ever since he had been banished to earth he had realised what a huge responsibility it was, his ego had deflated, and he was concerned with the weight of the role, that he wouldn’t be enough to be a good king. You knew he was afraid of letting his people and his family down again, but you knew better, you knew he would be an amazing king, his recent sacrifice was just proof of that.

Nothing you could think of would reassure him, you had no idea what to say to convince him that he could do this and make him believe that everything would be ok. But you did know how to distract him from all of this, even if it was for just a moment.

“King huh?” You whispered as you kissed along his jaw. “So, should I kneel before my King?” Your voice sultry as you slowly slid from his lap and sank to your knees between his spread legs.

Your hands stroked up and down his thighs, nails lightly nicking the skin as his muscles twitched under your touch, his length hardening in the confines of his boxers as you stared up at him with wide innocent eyes. “Y/N,” Thor sighed out, breath laboured and heavy as you kissed your way up his thighs, mouthing at his cock through the fabric of his underwear, his hands twitching at his sides as he yearned to cusp the back of your neck and manoeuvre you to where he desperately needed your touch. “You don’t need to do this.”

You hummed as you tugged down the rim of his boxers until his hard cock was freed, “But I want to.”

Without waiting for a response, you licked up his cock where it rested against his lower abdomen from the base of his shaft to the tip before wrapping your lips around the head and slowly working him further and further into your mouth, spurred on by the deep rumbling groan that erupted from deep within Thor’s chest.

You slowly began to bob your head up and down his thick length, hand working the part of his cock you couldn’t fit in your mouth, feeling him harden even more on your tongue as you traced the pulsing vein on the underside of his cock, flicking at the sensitive spot beneath his bulbous head as he gasped, his hips jolting into your eager mouth.

Thor pushed the unruly strands of hair back from your face, gripping the back of your head to help guide your movements as you stared up at him from where you were kneeling, watching his face contort in pleasure, eyes screwed shut as his bit down on his lower lip to stifle his groans, his chest rising and falling harshly as his skin gleamed with sweat.

With a grunt, Thor pulled you off him, lifting you off him as if you weighed nothing and attacked your lips with his, his spit-slicked cock caught between you as his hands wandered your body before settling on your ass. His lips trailed down your neck before nibbling at your collarbone, your hips rolling against his on instinct, your wet folds gliding over his cock making you both gasp.

“Y/N please, love, I need to be inside you,” Thor moaned, hands gripping your waist even harder.

You nodded eagerly, wrapping your legs tightly around his hips as he gently lay you down on the pillows, kicking his boxers off and positioning himself between your spread legs, propping his arms on either side of your head as he dipped down to capture your lips in a kiss, stroking his tongue into your mouth as you moaned at the contact, his hips thrusting against yours so the head of his cock nudged at your clit.

Thor cupped your cheek, forcing you to look into his eyes as he gripped his cock, trailing the head against your glistening folds before positioning himself at your entrance and slowly pushing forward, hooking your leg higher over his hip as he filled you, your breath hitching as you adjusted to the satisfying stretch.

You were both panting heavily at the feeling of being so intimately connected and you bucked your hips when you felt ready, needing Thor to move and you got your wish, a strangled groan falling from his lips as he began to roll his hips into yours in time with the echoing thunder outside. Your head fell back onto the pillow with a sigh as your back arched in pleasure, Thor holding you close to him with an arm around your waist as he laved your breasts with attention, suckling on your nipple as he began to thrust harder into you.

The springs in the bed began to squeak with every movement you made, the headboard banging against the wall in a steady rhythm as your high-pitched cries and Thor’s deep growls resonated around the room, the air between you charged with electricity.

Thor’s thick cock filled you perfectly, nudging against your g-spot with every thrust of his hips into yours, your toes curling as the pressure in your core began to build, hands clawing at the expanse of his bare back causing him to drive even harder into you, his hand moving to massage your breast, fingers tweaking at your nipple as his other hand trailed across your hipbone to circle your clit, his movements losing their finesse as he felt his end approach.

“Y/N, love, let go for me, please let go for me,” Thor pleaded, voice thick with lust as he felt you clench around his cock.

You buried your face in the crook of his neck as you release washed over you like a tidal wave, pulling you under until you were drowning in a sea of euphoria, wanton moans falling unabashedly from your lips as you released around his sensitive cock, cunt throbbing, triggering his own orgasm as his hips sloppily thrust into yours a few final time before he came with a shout, filling you with his cum as his body fell lax on top of yours.

The weight of his body crushing yours was a welcome comfort after being away from him for so long, the reassurance that he was real and there with you and his cock was still buried deep within you making a rush of warmth spread throughout your chest.

With a huff, Thor carefully pulled out of you before collapsing at your side, automatically wrapping his arm around your waist and pulling you until you were pressed tightly against him, head resting over his chest listening to his racing heart as your legs tangled with his. His fingers stroked up and down your back as your own drew invisible patterns across his chest, the sound of the dying thunder and rain pounding against the glass the only sounds in the room apart from your ragged breathing.

“Thank you,” Thor murmured against your forehead, lips grazing the skin as he spoke.

You grinned as you cuddled closer to him; “Trust me it was my pleasure.”

Thor’s rumbling chuckle shook his chest as he lightly swatted at your ass. “Cheeky,” He chastised, voice laced with humour as he titled your head back to meet your lips in a passionate kiss.

“What’s going to happen now?” You whispered as he broke away, looking away from him in fear of the answer.

“I go back to my people,” Thor sighed, swallowing against the lump in his throat at the gargantuan task before him, “I’ll try to create a new Asgard, Ragnarok means the end but it also means rebirth. Our story isn’t over yet, maybe we can right the wrongs of our past.”

You nodded, tears brimming in your eyes at the thought of him leaving you once more, when the sun finally rose he would return to his people as their king and you would return to yours as their protector. You both had lives you simply couldn’t run from.

“Come with me.”

“What? Thor I-”

“I know you have responsibilities here and I’m not asking you to abandon them Y/N. Just come with me; Asgard is on Midgard now my love, the stars don’t separate us anymore, we can be together without ignoring our duties. I love you and I don’t want to be without you anymore so come with me.”

You were shocked at Thor’s proposal, staring up at him with wide eyes and a slack jaw, his own expression holding so much hope that you would say yes. Could this work? Thor was right, Asgard was on earth now, you wouldn’t be an entirely different realm away from where you needed to be. The possibility of being able to be with Thor caused your heart to race with excitement, a small smile tugging at the corners of your lips as you looked up at the man you had loved for so long and you knew you weren’t going to let him go again. You couldn’t.

“Ok, let’s do it.”

[raysofcrosby]

REASON

“𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘰��𝘦 𝘴𝘰 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩...𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘢𝘴 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘢𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮.” – 𝙅𝙤𝙝𝙣 𝙂𝙧𝙚𝙚𝙣, 𝘼𝙣 𝘼𝙗𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙖𝙣𝙘𝙚 𝙤𝙛 𝙆𝙖𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙚𝙨

𝘨𝘪𝘧 𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘥𝘪𝘵 (𝘹)

𝘳𝘦𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘥: yes | no

𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨(𝘴): bad words here and there plus some alcohol consumption otherwise its just full of moody!nolan and quite angsty tbh.

𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵: 4,698

𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘣𝘺: break up in a small town by sam hunt

𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘳𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘦: yikes i’m back with another piece i wrote for my creative writing class but obviously i changed the names– i couldn’t have my professor thinking i was writing about hockey players ya know anyway like i said above, it’s pretty angsty lmao idk why i love writing sad things so much but oh well!!! enjoy!!! ;-) 

"Nolan hurry up back there! We need to get back soon!" Travis called out from the front of the store as he placed his booze of choice for the night up onto the counter.

"Yeah, yeah I'm coming," Nolan replied, turning his attention back to the liquor in front of him. He'd been home in Winnipeg now for a good month or so since the Flyers season had ended with no playoff bid. Yeah it sucked, actually, it really fucking sucked– but there was nothing he could do about it now. So when Nico had called and said he was coming to visit, Nolan took the opportunity to invite Travis too. Because what better way to get your mind off of the lack of playoff hockey, than by spending it out on a lake and drinking with your best friends?

In the few days that they'd been here, the three boys had already wreaked enough havoc in the Patrick home, that Nolan knew he was only one inappropriate joke away before his mom would book the three of them a hotel room and tell them to stay there. But they couldn't help it, their friendship was tight and after the whirlwind of a season both of their teams had– they needed a little fun.

Which is why he was standing in front of five rows of liquor, trying to decide which one he'd make his poison for the night. An old friend from Juniors was throwing a party at his house, and obviously Nolan, Travis and Nico were invited. The old friend said that the party was for Nolan, so to speak, a celebration on his return back from Philly and to commemorate the fact that he'd actually left his house for once. But in reality, it was just a get together with old friends while getting wasted on incredulous amounts of liquor all while sloppy games of beer pong, suck and blow and every other cliche high school drinking game Hollywood could manage into one movie, played on in the background.

Not that Nolan was complaining or anything. He was actually excited about the party since he hadn't really seen or talked to most of the people who would be in attendance since last summer. That, and he was always down for a party. His eyes skimmed across two separate bottles of vodka, unsure of which to choose for tonight as 'eenie meenie miney mo' played in his head.

"You should go with Belvedere," Nolan straightened up and looked to his left to see you standing maybe a foot or two away from him. "Black Cow usually made you throw up."

He opened his mouth to speak, but he couldn't make the words come out. Hell, he couldn't even find the words if he wanted to. He could barely even believe that you were there, standing right in front of him...in person, after all this time. He blinked once, twice, adding a third time for good measure to make sure that his mind wasn't playing any tricks on him. But you were still standing there.

"Hi, Nolan." You laughed, tossing some of your hair over your shoulder as you motioned towards the bottles in front of him. "You don't mind if I..."

"No, g-" he cleared his throat and stepped back from the shelves, "go ahead."

You smiled and walked closer to the shelves, bending down and causing your hair to fall back over your shoulders. You grabbed two bottles of Ciroc and stood back up, a bottle in each hand. "Thanks," you said, biting the inside of your cheek, a habit you wished you could rid yourself of but never had the willpower to do so. "Well, I guess I'll see you later?"

Nolan nodded while simultaneously swallowing the lump that had grown in his throat. You lightly laughed and turned away, walking to the end of the aisle and disappearing out of his sight. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes, trying to figure out if what just happened was one huge mindfuck. "Nolan what the fuck, come on!" Travis called out. Nolan opened his eyes t see Travis standing there at the end of the aisle with an annoyed look on his face. "We're about to leave without you and your alcohol."

Nolan rolled his eyes as turned away from his teammate. "Calm the fuck down, I'm coming. I just couldn't decide." He looked at the shelves and grabbed both the Belvedere and Black Cow vodkas. At this point, he knew that he'd probably be needing both bottles for tonight.

He walked down the aisle and brushed past Travis, putting his bottles on the counter and looking at Nico. "Sorry, I couldn't decide what to get."

"Well, at least you're here now," Nico shrugged, handing his I.D. and credit card over to the cashier. "Because now we can get home faster and then start drinking and therefore get wasted."

Nolan laughed, shaking his head as he stuffed his hands into his jean pockets. "Yeah, I couldn't decide between the two, so I got both."

"Did you talk to Y/N?" Travis asked, resting his elbow on the counter and causing Nico to look at him.

"Y/N? Y/N was here?" He asked, looking at Nolan. "Where?"

"You guys were still grabbing something. I let her check out before us since she already had all of her stuff." Travis replied, picking up the two cases of beer off the counter. "So Patty, did you talk to her?"

Nolan scrunched his nose and bit the inside of his cheek as he thought about whether or not he should lie to his best friends. Would it even benefit them if he told them that he had talked to her? Instead, he just sighed. "Kind of. She told me not to get Black Cow because I always had the habit of throwing up after drinking it all," he replied, grabbing the bag holding his two bottles in it.

"And yet you bought it anyway?" Nico asked, putting his I.D. and credit card back into his wallet and giving Nolan a confused look. "Can I ask why?"

"I need to get drunk and that's the way to do it," Nolan replied, shrugging his shoulders and walking out of the liquor store with his friends right behind him.

"God, I knew we were best friends for a reason." Travis sighed, as he got into the drivers' side of his car, Nico in the passenger side and Nolan in the back with all of the alcohol.

Nolan dug into his front pocket and brought his cellphone out, unlocking it and opening Instagram. He didn't feel the need to scroll down the feed filled with empty smiles of the people he followed, nor did he pay any mind to the red number over in the top right of his screen showing just how many DM's he'd received from the many girls who vied for his attention and the endless amount of fans who congratulated him on the season. Nope, he went straight to your profile and scrolled down to find what he was looking for.

He didn't know how many times he'd stared at this picture, millions perhaps. Or however many times it takes for it to bur a picture into one's mind further than it already was. It was the last picture you and him had taken together, about three weeks into the new season. You had come out and stayed with him and Travis for the weekend since it was your fall break. He could still see you sitting there, wearing his jersey and talking amongst the other WAGs at warm-ups. It had been the best weekend of his life, he thought that nothing could get better than this very moment.

After that weekend, you flew back home to return to school and he couldn't wait till you could come down again. He was already planning your second trip, not paying any mind to the fact your facetime calls had gotten shorter, the texts didn't come in multiples and you both were playing a consistent game of phone tag every day. A week after you'd gone back to school, you broke up with him. And when the Flyers came up to Winnipeg for a game, you still showed up with his family, only this time you weren't wearing his jersey, and when the Patrick's invited you out to dinner after the game, you didn't go out.

And Nolan was pissed. Not only because of the fact that you had broken up with him a week after just spending hours in bed together, cuddling and talking about the future, but because you hadn't spoken a word to him or even given him a full reason as to why you broke off your 2-year relationship. All he got from you, hours before the game was that you didn't think that being in a relationship was healthy for the two of you right now. When he asked you what you meant by that, you just said that you would 'tell him later.'

Well, here he was, five months later at home and still no explanation. It fucked him up bad five months ago, he wasn't afraid to admit it. Travis had called him out on his shitty appearance once or twice and even Nico had noticed his different behavior whenever they were able to get in a talk. Yeah, you had fucked him up real bad and truth be told, he hasn't been able to get it completely out of his mind since.

"Nolan, you good man?" Nico asked, waving his hand in front of Nolan's face and causing him to jump.

Nolan turned to see that it was Nico and sighed, locking his phone and sliding it back into his pocket. "Yeah, I'm good." He brought his solo cup to his lips and took a long drink, the vodka numbing his mouth for a partial moment as the burning feeling traveled down his throat.

Nico sighed and shook his head as Nolan turned around to face him. "Why don't you just talk to her, Nolan?"

Nolan took another sip of his drink. "Two reasons. Reason number one," he said, holding up his index finger. "She hasn't reached out to me in months. And reason number two," Another sip as the burning feeling followed soon after and he held up his middle finger. "She's not even here, so I couldn't talk to her even if I could."

"Well it looks like it's your lucky day buddy," Nico said, bringing the cup to his lips and nodding in the direction behind Nolan. "Because she's making herself a drink right now."

Nolan turned to see you standing at the designated liquor counter, making yourself your signature drink– captain and coke. Nico patted his shoulder and stood next to him. "It's now or never," Nolan went to say something but Nico waved him off. "And no, never is not an option."

"Well, you can't say it's not an option AFTER you give it as an option!" He yelled out as Nico waved him off and walked towards a beer pong table.

Nolan took a deep breath again, exhaling before bringing the brim of his cup back to his lips and chugging the rest of his drink. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and stood a bit taller before making his way to the counter. As he neared you, he hesitantly reached out for your arm, only to back out at the last minute and turn around. "Nolan?" He stopped in his tracks and took another deep breath before turning around and putting on his best 'happy' smile that he could. "I thought that was you."

"What gave it away?" He asked, putting his empty cup onto the counter.

"Honestly? The hair," you replied, looking up at his hair. "It's gotten longer. I don't think there are many guys in the world who could pull off that length of hair."

"Yeah, my mom says I need to get a haircut soon," He laughed, running his fingers through his hair.

"What's your poison for the night?" You asked, bringing the orange solo cup to your lips.

"Belvedere," He said, grabbing the bottle off of the counter and pouring it into his cup, filling it. "As suggested."

"Well, at least you'll be sure to remember your night then," you laughed, brushing the hair out of your face.

Nolan nodded and put the cap back onto the bottle, setting it back down onto the counter. He took a sip, pondering his thoughts on just how he could get you alone to talk about why you split up. You were looking around the room and sipping from your drink, smiling and waving at just about everyone you knew...which was just about everyone in attendance. The only person that you couldn't seem to keep your eyes on for more than a few seconds though, was him– and he took notice.

He couldn't help but wonder how it got to this point. How the once comfortable silence between you two that could be there for hours on end, suddenly flipped a switch and no longer seemed comfortable. Had it been something he did? Was it the way he approached you? But you had seemed so comfortable when he came over, open to conversation. "Hey, I was wondering if–"

"Hey over here!" You perked up, raising your arm into the air and waving it before looking back at Nolan. "Sorry, hold that thought. I'll be right back though, okay?”

Nolan just nodded and took another sip of his drink as you smiled and disappeared into the crowd. "You fucking idiot," he mumbled, downing another sip as he nerves began to take over the more he thought about talking to you. 

After you first broke up, he was set on needing to see you. He needed for you to tell him in person that this was all a mistake. That you didn't mean to break up with him. And then a few days later, he found himself never wanting to see you again. He always knew that it would be near impossible to do, never seeing you again, especially since you shared all of your friends and every hangout around town and he had nowhere to go in the summers BUT home. So he kept that plausibility in the back of his mind, which is why he was so shocked about seeing you in the store so soon. He thought that he'd at least have until the end of the summer– but he was a damn fool, that's for sure.

He took another long sip of his drink, feeling less of the burn this time around. He looked around the room, spotting Travis and Nico playing beer pong against two girls that Nolan couldn't make out. As his eyes wandered more, he found himself more focused on trying to find where you had gone, wondering what was taking so long and who you went to see. When his eyes landed on the front door, he felt his stomach drop into his shoes. His lips tightened and he turned back to the counter, grabbing his unopened bottle of Black Cow and pushed himself away from the counter and through the crowd.

"Nolan, hey! Dude where are you going?" Travis yelled, his voice still a mumble among the loud music.

Nolan had heard him, sure. But he didn't care to stop and look to see what he wanted. Nope, he was on a mission and that mission took him towards the glass back door and into the backyard.

There weren't as many people out here, but he kept walking until he hit the old playground set- taking a seat onto one of the swings and opening the bottle. His breathing was heavy as he replayed the image in my mind again and again. A mix of anger, hurt and betrayal was running through him at a higher level than he knew what to do with. So he did the only thing that he thought could help it. He brought the bottle to my lips, taking a long hard swig- no longer feeling the burning in his throat.

He always knew that there was a big chance that he'd see you around town, or that you'd move on from your relationship. But he never thought that you'd move onto someone he knew...someone who was one of my close friends back in school and spent countless of hours with on the ice growing up. He took another swig and looked at the night sky.

Yeah, I never expected that bullshit.

He hadn't walked back into the house since he saw you. He could barely get himself to move, so on the swing he stayed. He brought the bottle back to his lips and tossed his head back, taking all the alcohol it had left to offer. When the bottle was empty, he stood himself up the best that he could, only to stumble a bit to his left. He reached out for the chain of the swing and kept himself from falling down. "Nolan, hey!" Nico called out, jogging over to him from the porch.

"Dude where have you been for the past hour?" Travis added, following behind him.

"Drowning myself i-in vodka and feelings," Nolan slurred, holding up the empty bottle. "Not really the b-best mix."

"Holy shit Patty, did you drink all of that?" Nico asked, his eyes wide.

"Yep!" Nolan yelled, throwing his arms in the air and laughing. "And i-it was delicious."

"What the hell were you thinking? You're going to be throwing up for a week!" Travis reached for the bottle and Nolan pulled it back. "Give me the fucking bottle Nolan."

"I had to drown out the image man. I can't stop s-seeing it." He slurred, holding the empty bottle tight in his grasp.

"What image? Seeing what Nolan?"

"Y/N AND NOAH!" Nolan didn't even recognize his own voice as it echoed against the night sky, barely a blip on the radar of anyone in attendance of the party. "I went to talk to her and she le-left to get someone," he hiccuped again, looking at his two best friends. "I saw her kissing h-him!"

It was then that the began to notice the slight churning of his stomach. It only began to escalate when he saw the look on his two best friends faces. He expected them to look surprised, but imagine his own surprise when he noticed just how casual they looked instead. He opened his mouth to say something, yell something at them, but he couldn't bring himself to.

"We know, Nolan. That's why we've been kind of pushing you so hard to talk to her." Nico said, reaching for the bottle.

Travis gave Nolan a guilt-ridden look. He knew he fucked up by not telling Nolan, but he also didn't expect for you to be at the party either.  "Yeah man, we didn't want you to be caught off guard by it.."

"Well, it didn't fucking work you assholes." Nolan threw the bottle down and swallowed the horrible gut feeling he had before standing tall. "I'm going to talk to her."

"Oh no you're not," Nico said, grabbing an arm and pulling him back as Travis grabbed the other one. "We're taking you home."

"Let go!" Nolan yelled, snatching one arm free and working on the other. "If you were my best friends you'd let me do th-this."

"We are your best friends Nolan, which is exactly why we're not letting you do this."

Nolan glared at the two of them with a look that could send them both six feet under if at all possible. He opened his mouth to yell a bunch of obscenities at them when he felt his stomach begin to churn again, only this time it was much more violent. He grabbed onto the swingset and bent over, dry heaving until his stomach began to empty himself. As the first wave ended, he felt supportive pats on the back from his two friends. "Feel better?" Nico asked.

Nolan went to speak again, only to throw up even more. "I'll take that as a solid no," Travis mumbled, continuing to pat Nolan on the back.

"Hey Travis, is everything okay? Did you find him?"

"Yeah Y/N, we're–"

"Actually we're not," Nolan said, wiping his mouth and standing up as straight as he could, putting some weight against the swing set so he could seem like he was a tad bit sober.

"Nolan, I told you Black Cow always made you throw up," you laughed, bending down and picking the bottle up from the grass.

“Well, at least you told me something."

"What's that supposed to mean?" You asked, letting the bottle fall to your side as you looked at the hot mess that was Nolan Patrick. His hair was sticking to the sweat on his forehead from puking and the splotches on his cheeks had already turned tomato red.

"You know what I'm talking about Y/N." He sneered, waving his hands around.

"I really don't Nolan...." You looked at Travis and Nico for support, only to get shoulder shrugs and confused looks. "We're going to take you home."

As you walked towards him, it was all Nolan could do not to run into your arms. This had been the very thing he'd dreamed about and wanted for the last five months. For you to be there with him. But not like this, this wasn't how he had imagined it going– drunk on a bottle of vodka with bad breath. "No! Not until you give me a reason!"

You were starting to get mad. You couldn't understand what the hell he was drunk rumbling on and on about. "A reason? Nolan, what the hell are you talking about?"

This was it, he was going to throw up again. He could feel it in his chest as he opened his mouth to speak. "The reason why you broke my heart!" He yelled, a bit shocked at just how loud and assertive his voice had sounded. He noticed the way your face fell and that you had taken a few steps back, and he felt proud for a moment because he could see that you remembered.

"Yeah, now you know what I'm talking about. You said you would give me a reason and you never did. And now here I am, wanting to talk to you and see if maybe you could tell me something– ANYTHING! But no," he dropped his hands to his side and looked at her, shaking his head. "Instead I see you all over Noah."

You looked at him with the most gut-wrenching look he had ever seen in his life. A look that could cause even the person with the coldest heart in the world, to cave. And for a moment, that proud feeling he had turned into regret. He could see the tears begin to build in your eyes as you stared at him. He wanted you to be angry at him, to yell at him. He wanted you to feel something the way that he had felt these last five months...and yet you showed nothing. And that hurt him more than anything ever could...he couldn't help but wonder what the hell he had become.

"Nolan, I think it's time we go..." Travis said, standing in front of him clearing his throat as Nico turned his attention to you.

"Do you still love me?" Nolan croaked, looking over Travis's shoulder.

"Nolan I–"

"Just tell me Y/N, I need to know. Do you still love me?" He stared at you, searching your face for maybe even the slightest insight into what you were thinking and what your answer would be. "I need to know the answer so I can prepare myself for when I see you around town every summer. Because Y/N it's going to be so...fucking hard to see you at every stop light, every store. To see your car driving down the block and realizing that you're not mine anymore. That there's someone else's house you'll be going to for midnight dates. Someone else's arms you'll be crying in whenever you watch 'The Last Song.'" You stared at him, mouth dropped from his confession and tears stinging in your eyes. "Just tell me...please."

You took a shaky breath and hugged yourself, trying your best to keep your tears at bay. "Nolan, it's– it's complicated, okay?"

Nolan ran his tongue against his cheek and laughed to himself as he looked up at the sky in disbelief. "No, it's not. You just gave me your answer." He looked at Nico and stood up fully. "I'm ready to go home."

He stumbled his way by you, brushing against your shoulder and keeping his focus on the back gate. "Nolan, wait!" You called out, the desperation in your voice loud and clear to Nolan.

He took a deep breath and kept on walking as Nico and Travis joined him, each with an arm over his shoulders. "You okay buddy?" Travis asked, looking at him.

"I don't feel too hot," Nolan mumbled as they walked along the outside of the house.

"You'll feel better soon Patty, no doubt in my mind you won't."

"Ha, GOT YOU FUCKER!!!" A faint voice yelled as a slapping sound followed it.

Nolan opened his eyes slowly and saw that he was in his bedroom. He sat himself up slowly realizing very quickly that it wasn't the best decision to make since his world literally began to spin. He closed my eyes tight and sat there for a few moments before hearing a few more yells coming from outside his room, but too faint to really hear what was being said. When his case of the spins ended, he stood himself up and shuffled his way to his bedroom door, opening it and walking down the hallway. The closer he got to basement stairs, the clearer the voices became.

He pushed open the door to see Nico and Travis all sitting on the couch playing NHL '18. "Dude, are you even trying?" Travis taunted, throwing his arms in the air. "GOAL!!! LOOK AT THAT FRESH CELLY."

Nico rolled his eyes and looked up, clearing his throat. Travis looked at him and saw his eyes looking in Nolan's direction and then looked at Nolan. "Good morning sunshine, how are you feeling this morning?" He asked, smiling.

"Like I got ran over by a truck," Nolan said, his voice very hoarse. "How long have you guys been down here?"

"We slept here, dude," Travis said, looking at him. "Didn't really want to be in your puke stench of a room honestly."

"Yeah, no offense. But we still checked on you throughout the night." Nico added, shrugging his shoulders.

The doorbell rang and Nolan took a deep breath, looking out into the hallway expecting to hear his parents or his sisters move towards the door, but hearing nothing. "And my parents and sisters?"

"Your mom and sisters went out to brunch and your dad went golfing with a work friend," Travis replied, looking away from the tv. "So it looks like you'll be the one answering the door."

"Don't fuck up my man-cave," Nolan said, leaving the man-cave and walking further down the hallway until he reached the living room. He walked around the couch and over to the front door, looking through the peephole and not seeing anyone on the porch. Weird, but he didn't dwell much on it before he unlocked the door and opened it, looking out and not seeing anyone in visible distance. He shook his head, it was probably just some neighborhood kids messing around with the Nolan Patrick. 

God, kids were annoying sometimes.

Nolan went to turn away when something on the ground caught his eye. He bent down and saw an envelope lying face down on their welcome mat. Picking it up, he flipped it over to see it had his name written on it....in your handwriting. He opened the envelope and tilted it to the side, letting everything that was in it, slid into his hand. There was a letter and a Polaroid picture of the two of you and on the front, "always & forever" was written in your beautiful cursive handwriting. He flipped it over and instantly recognized the chicken scratch on the back...it was his own handwriting.

𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘮𝘢𝘥𝘦 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘦𝘺𝘦𝘴, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘮𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵, 𝘐 𝘬𝘯𝘦𝘸 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘣𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶. ||  2/14/17

He remembered that picture perfectly. It was a few months into your relationship and you had flown in to surprise him for Valentine's day. He hadn't expected you to come in, so he had absolutely nothing planned. The best part is that Claude and Ryanne had you two tag along on their Valentines day plans– which included a dinner and a stroll through some of Philly's landmarks. You were most excited to see the Rocky statue and Nolan could still remember the way his heart skipped a few beats when he saw you running up the steps, laughing on your way. You had asked Ryanne to take a picture of the two of you, handing over your polaroid camera he had gotten you for Christmas. And when she laughed and told you to pose, Nolan remembered looking down at you and smiling at just how goofy you looked– like a kid in a candy store.

The memory came to an end as he held the picture in his other hand with the envelope and unfolded a piece of paper that looked like it was from a journal. It had deep creases as if it had been unfolded and refolded multiple times as well. He flipped it over to the other side and saw your handwriting and on the top right corner, a date. But it wasn't just any date...it was the day after she broke up with him.

11/18/2018

N,

I don't know if I'll ever get the guts to actually give this to you, but you asked me for the reason why I ended things and this is the way you're going to get it. It seems selfish, I know. You deserved so much more than what I've already told you and I hope one day I'll be able to truly tell you why I did what I did. We spent two amazing years together and there's nothing in this world that I would trade them for and I never thought that we would end up where we are today...never in a million years. But things happen and things change and we can't fast-forward time to know if it's all really worth it, so we just trust our hearts and hope it turns out right. And I never really minded putting all that trust into my heart because with you, I didn't have to think twice or question myself- I kind of already knew what I wanted. 

I'm rambling now, I know, but I swear I'm getting to the point. Things got so hard once you left Nolan and none of it was your fault, so don't you dare ever think it was. I just missed your a lot more than I thought I would- and it's really hard when you miss people. But you know what they say; if you miss someone that means you're lucky. It means you had someone special in your life, someone worth missing. The Skype calls and text messages and snapchats only partially filled the void, so when I flew out to visit you... I thought that everything would be okay, that everything would be perfect and wonderful again. But that last night with you, God I swear it made it worse. And I still remember that night. The night when everything fell together so perfectly and I wished it would last forever because I felt like everything was normal again...but it didn't. 

So when I flew back home, it dawned on me N, it dawned on me that maybe this is supposed to be the end of us, maybe we're not meant to be together anymore. Maybe we were here to teach one another a lesson and once the lesson was taught, we were supposed to leave. Maybe you being on this amazing journey is teaching us a great lesson in life, one that we both needed to learn; that sometimes growing up means letting go of the dreams you aren't able to achieve...like those dreams of growing old together, the ones we talked about when we'd lay down on a blanket in your backyard and look at the stars.

 You've got so many dreams and achievements ahead of you N and I want you to go out there and achieve them and be free while you do. I want nothing more than to see you succeed because that's what loving someone is all about. Putting them before yourself so they can flourish. So me breaking up with you has nothing to do about not loving you. It's not that we didn't love each other, it's just that love wasn't enough. So I think I have to let go...we have to let go. I really believe you were the greatest thing that ever happened to me N. And no matter where we go in life, you will forever be the person I'll never stop looking for in a crowded place.

Always and Forever, Y/N

He bit the inside of his cheek and sighed, looking up from the crinkled paper and wiping his face on his t-shirt sleeve. He took a deep breath and looked back down at the paper, folding it back up and putting the picture back into the envelope as well and walked back into his house, closing and locking the door behind him. "Hey Nolan, who was at the door?" Travis asked, his voice making Nolan jump.

       "Oh uh, no one. Just the paper." He said as he opened the fridge. "Can you toss me a soda please?"

       He tossed him a soda and grabbed himself one, then closing the door and meeting him in the living room. "Paper huh? Where is it?" He asked, looking down at the envelope in his hands.

       "Oh, it's uh-" Nolan scratched the back of his neck, trying to come up with a lie.

       He laughed and plopped his hand onto his shoulder. "It's 12:30 dude, your parents already got the paper. But I'm sure whatever it is, must have been worth the read."

       "Yeah...it was," Nolan said, looking down at the envelope in his hands.        "What do you say? Let's watch me kick Nico's ass in NHL '18 for the hundredth time huh?" He smiled, walking ahead of him and down the stairs, back into the man- cave.

       Nolan nodded and followed him, stopping just outside the door and opening the envelope again and pulling out the small polaroid. He ran his thumb over your handwriting on the front and smiled.

Though it still hurts, he finally got his reason...and that's better than nothing.

[shadowsof-thenight]

The long way home: Chapter 6

Story summary: An AU about Steve Rogers that takes place in college. When you were kids, Steve was your best friend. Where he was you were and vice versa. So when your father got a new job on the other side of the country your 11 year old heart broken.

Over the years you had stayed in contact, though. And now, seven years later, you were off to college and unknowingly you'd applied to the college he had started at last year. You agree to meet on your second day and suddenly it all seemed a little less scary. Will you pick up where you'd left off? Or will everything have changed as much as Steve's appearance.

Ship: Steve Rogers X Reader

Warnings: None. Words: 2712

If you want to get tagged, please let me know. I’d be happy too. This goes for all my stories .

A/n: I hope you like this! I have most of the story outlines and big parts already written. With me being home so much now, I'll most likely update twice a week from now on. Or I'll try anyway.

Let me know what you thought of this chapter.

Masterlist           Story Masterlist

Previous Chapter

“Hi there boozy” Natasha said a little too loud as she dropped down on the couch next to Steve. He was hunched over and groaned loudly as he tried to block out the sounds around him by placing his hands over his ears.  Natasha smirked as she looked in his direction. So far, she had not once dealt with a hangover and she took perhaps a little too much pleasure in teasing whoever was dealing with it. She had gone easy on you, but loved annoying the men.

“Can you not shout” Steve asked her in nothing but a whisper and she laughed loudly as she pushed against his shoulder. For a moment you thought that the movement turned him a little green and you wondered if it was smart to move a little further away from the sickly man.

“That's just my natural volume” Natasha countered, her voice perky. Surely she wasn't lying. There was no shouting, but there was some added perkiness to spite him. Not to mention the shove had not been entirely necessary. You chuckled and glanced towards the kitchen where Sam was making breakfast for his hungover friend. Apparently Steve had been the only one that not stopped drinking until the party had ended.  Neither Bucky or Sam seemed any worse for wear.

“How come neither of you took him home?” you wondered as you walked over to the kitchen and stood with your hip against the counter, watching Sam.  

“I had other things on my mind” Sam said smirking. Just then you noticed the hickey on his neck. Quickly pulling down his collar you laughed and asked him for a name. He promised to give it when he was sure it was more than one night. Accepting his answer you walked back to the living room and dropped down on the couch opposite of Steve and Natasha.

“I hope it was worth it, cause he called Y/n from her bed” Natasha said, again a little louder than needed. She smirked broadly when Steve groaned again. Steve then dropped his head on the armrest of the couch and put a pillow over his head. Earning himself a boisterous laugh from Natasha and Bucky.

“Sooooo worth it” Sam smiled and brought over a plate to Steve.

Natasha protested loudly that he did not deserve such treatment and she would eat his share instead. Steve didn't even fight her, he just kept his head underneath the pillow. Sam chuckled and began to make another serving, while Natasha moved to sit next to you and share her snatched breakfast. She looked rather proud of her conquest. You could not help but chuckle again at her pleased expression, before you helped yourself to piece of bacon.

“What about you?” Natasha then asked her boyfriend, who was busy making coffee.

“When I left he refused to come. Said the party was just getting started.” Bucky shrugged as he grabbed mugs from the cabinet above him.

“What time was that?” Sam asked incredulous. Bucky shrugged again, not sure what time that had been. It could not have been too long before Steve had called you. Otherwise you would have ran into Bucky at their place.

Bucky walked back with two cups of coffee, placing one in front of Steve and giving the other to Natasha, bending down to give her a quick peck. He then went back to grab his own cup. Natasha quickly gave you the remnants of the breakfast that was on the plate and practically attacked her coffee-cup. You chuckled as you munched on bacon and eggs that she had left for you.

You had quickly figured out months ago that Natasha's upbeat personality was only sustained by pouring coffee into her. And the pouring needed to be near constant. Without it she was dangerous. Bucky knew this and would always offer her a cup as soon as she walked in.

Soon Sam joined you four on the couches with another plate of food for Steve and water bottles for you and him. He smiled as he sat down next to you, while Bucky took up residence on the armrest next to Natasha.

“So, what happened last night?” Sam inquired and Bucky quickly looked to you. Shaking your head ever so slightly, you hoped he understood that you did not want to say anything. This was not a subject you wished to talk about now, if ever. When you had woken up that morning, Natasha had already been up and wondered where you had gone during the night. With her keen ability to observe she had noticed that your things were not in the same place as the night before. She certainly had an eye for detail.

You had been quick to explain that Steve had called for you to pick him up. Which you had done promptly.

Naturally you had been a little less forthcoming with the details of the pick up itself, leaving out the words he had said to you. Same as his apparent need to hold you close last night. She could not hear any of that. You weren't ready to face it yourself. So in your adapted version, you had simply been helping a friend. A friend that had been grateful and fallen asleep almost instantly. You could only hope that Bucky would follow your lead in this.

“I don't know” Steve groaned in answer as he sipped on his coffee and listlessly stabbed at his food with a fork.

“Come on” Sam called out a little too loud and he quickly apologised to his friend, while you and Natasha only laughed at Steve's expense. He was such a baby. You knew from experience, that Steve would continue to whine and groan for another hour or so, before his normal personality would resurface. Until then, Natasha took great pleasure in teasing him. Often aided by Bucky.

“No really, I remember calling Y/N, and getting another beer while I waited” Steve offered and you looked at him with a raised eyebrow.

“Just the one? Really?” you asked and when he looked at you with confusion written on his face you laughed again.

“You were practically incoherent when I got there” you explained and he slapped a hand over his face.

“Sorry” Steve was mortified and Natasha just laughed a little louder, while Bucky began to tell him how could barely get a word out by the time you had asked him for help.

You were grateful for Bucky's silence on the words that Steve did muster and hoped that it would stay between the two of you. You would be the one mortified if it got out. You and Steve probably, because than he would have to explain that he didn't mean any of it. You weren't sure if you wanted to hear him ever speak those words.

While everyone talked, Steve was slowly becoming the man he was before the alcohol. Slowly but surely the colour returned to his cheeks and the shaking off his limps faded. After taking another dose of paracetamol, he could even laugh at Natasha’s attempts to make him wince by speaking far too loud. Natasha just winked at him when she noticed he was finally recovering. Sam’s phone rang and he stood up and walked to the kitchen before answering. You looked at Natasha with a silent question, one she could only answer with a shrug. Was that his mystery date? Since you were certain Sam would introduce her to you all when he was ready, both of you decided not to press the subject. However the curiosity was still there. When Sam returned from the kitchen, he quickly answered the question he did not even know had crossed your mind, by informing all of you that it had been Thor. Thor was in the local park, playing a friendly game of football with a few teammates and he wondered if Steve, Bucky and Sam wanted to join in.

Sam was definitely game, however he doubted Steve would be worth too much on the field. And Bucky would only go if Natasha was good. With a sneaky wink in your direction she began to whine, explaining that she had hoped to spend the day with her boyfriend. However, she was willing to come on a few conditions, being the good girlfriend she was. One, you would accompany her. (Sam quickly began pleading with you) and two, it would be up to the boys to arrange dinner for the two of you that evening. Both Sam and Bucky quickly jumped on that. Laughing you were quick to concede and promised you'd come with them. Little did they know, that you and Natasha had already discussed that the weather would be far too nice to spend the day inside. And while the men always wanted to get active, you both had hoped for a nice relaxing day in the sun. Thor’s plan would combine the two wonderfully.

Now that they were certain you and Natasha were on board, everyone turned to Steve. Who, up until that point, had remained completely silent. Groaning a little he eventually gave in without a fight. He just wanted to hang out with his friends. And while usually he would jump at a chance to play a friendly game, today he really wasn’t feeling it. As much as he was coming back to life, his body still felt way too heavy. 

Before everyone was ready to leave for the park, Bucky, considerate as he was, quickly grabbed a large blanket for Natasha and you to sit on as you watched the game. ***

The Weather really was wonderful. The sun was out and with the 65 degrees, it seemed like a good day to lay around in the warming rays. While the men greeted their friends and team-mates, you and Natasha found a nice spot in the sun,one near to a tree. That way you could seek out the shade if you wanted too.

Soon the game was in full swing, while you and Natasha spoke about anything and everything. Although you were careful not to mention the night before. If the subject would come up, Natasha would quickly figure out you were hiding something and you found that you had trouble lying to her. Better to avoid the subject all together.

After a while something on the grassy field caught your eye. Steve. Well, honestly you'd kept him in your sight the entire time. And for the past twenty minutes or so he tried really hard to keep up with his team-mates. Now however, he was obviously struggling more and more. He tried to run as fast as them, but failed miserably and when he threw the ball, it was never quite as far as he hoped it would go. Finally after another ten minutes or so, he gave up. Not before falling down at least twice, mind you. You winced everything he went down, while Bucky just laughed loudly, before helping him back up again. Natasha smirked as she watched the whole ordeal. Out of breath and covered in sweat, Steve dropped down on the grass next to you. He was beat.

By now you had moved towards the tree trunk, leaning your back against it. That way, you legs got some rays, while your head remained cool. You chuckled as your friend looked your way exasperated with himself. He hated not keeping up. He probably regretted drinking as much as he had last night. But there was nothing he could do about it now. You smiled and placed a hand on his cheek for a second.

Once Steve had finally caught his breath, he let a deep sigh escape him and he dropped his head on your lap. You smiled as you looked down on him, his eyes directed at the field where everyone else was still playing. Unable to control yourself, you began to comb through his hair, enjoying the feeling. The quiet intimacy of the moment. It felt nice. Steve sighed again and the corners of his mouth moved up into a smile. Soon his eyes began to droop and he drifted off to sleep.

Another thirty minutes later the rest of the players took a break and Natasha offered to help Sam and Clint, another teammate, to get drinks for everyone. Promising she would be back soon, she kissed Bucky’s forehead and waved before jogging to catch up to the two men.

Bucky sat down next to you and quickly took the opportunity to breach the subject he had wanted to talk about ever since you had walked into his apartment that morning. Last night.

He took a deep breath and, after checking if Steve was really asleep, looked you directly in the eye.

“So….are you going to talk to him?” He finally asked. He had prodded Steve and waved his hand frantically in front of his face. After also repeating his name a few times, he was satisfied that the man on your lap was truly asleep. You chuckled at his antics, but froze at his question.

“Nope” you simply said, looking down at the sleeping figure below. He looked so peaceful. And handsome.

“Have you told Nat?” Bucky followed.

“Nope, wasn’t really planning on it either.” You confessed honestly.

“Right…do you want to talk about it?” He offered and you smiled. The intention was nice.

“ No. Thanks. I’m good” you chuckled. The conversation was quickly making you uncomfortable. There were too many ears everywhere and Steve could wake up.

“ But he almost…” Bucky tried again. He was persistent, you realized. “but he didn’t,” you were quick to interrupt him. Much like you had interrupted Steve that night as well, “Besides he doesn’t remember” you added with a shrug of your shoulders, pretending it didn’t faze you. As if it didn’t matter. As if the words Steve had almost said didn’t rock you to your core.

“ Are you sure?” Bucky wondered out loud, looking down at Steve again. He was obviously struggling to believe you. His face was filled with concern. One the one hand you were glad to have a friend that was trying to help you. On the other hand, you really wished he would just let it go.

“I think you should just talk to him”. Bucky added after a moment. Conviction written on his face. Apparently, he thought that it would serve some purpose to talk the night over. You disagreed. It would do you no good. And Steve would only feel guilty for blabbing on in his drunken state. Surely he could not have meant it.

“Thanks, but no” you offered Bucky a smile. Surely he meant well, but you really didn’t think it would help either of you.

“Fine” Bucky said, his hands up in defeat, “But I think you both need that conversation” he added adamantly.

You scoffed and Bucky held up his hands defensively admitting defeat in this disagreement. You were sure he would revisit this in the near future, but for now he allowed you to try and push it from your mind. And you were glad for the reprieve.

When Natasha came back, silence had fallen over your little group of three and she looked a little suspicious as she handed you a bottle of water. When neither of you gave any indication that anything was wrong, she eventually let it slide. For now. She was at least as persistent as Bucky proved to be, you were certain she would corner you later.

It took Steve another hour to finally wake up from his slumber. Slowly he stretched his legs, before turning onto his back, smiling lazily at you as soon as he caught your eye. You could not help but smile back at him.

No matter what had happened last night, you could not keep your distance from Steve. You were too happy to have him back in your life again. You were not about to let some stupid infatuation from your side ruin this life long friendship.

Tags: @musicfreak180

[nevergiveupneverrun]

Bodyguard - Chapter Thirteen “The memory of the body” Part Two

Hello, I hope you’re all doing great. Here is chapter thirteen of my Story Bodyguard. I’m sorry in advance for the mistakes… English isn’t my first language and I do my best. Here is the link to the previous chapter: Click Here.

I hope you will enjoy this chapter :) 💛

- Good evening, sirs. Arizona Robbins, the club owner.

Arizona content herself with this simple mark of courtesy by examining us furtively, without another gesture towards us. - I’ve booked you a table as planned, I hope you like it, you follow me? She turns around and takes us a few more meters before opening the door and taking us to the night club proper. I glance back to find this exit, marked again with a sign « Staff Only from Rainbow ». The atmosphere of the night club is heavily sifted with candles lighting tables placed at regular intervals. The colors inside the club are a mix of black, white and wood, leaving an impression of mystery and unknown in the room. The music instantly invades our ears: an electro sound marking a rapid and cadenced measure at the rhythm of which I see silhouettes wiggle. Arizona advance confidently, making signs to different people she sees. She ended up at a table, in the middle of the room, facing the dance floor illuminated by two spots, and a few meters from a scene where I distinguish instruments and mixing tables, a DJ in place, the earphone stuck to the ears. - Here is the table… central as desired… and in terms of exits, the one from which we come is only a few steps away, and otherwise, you have another access that also takes you outside, just behind the post on your left. I scan the indicated place of the glance, quickly locating the door and the sign is already seen previously. I then redirect my attention to the table: a pedestal-style glass coffee table, decorated with a bouquet of white roses with an acronym « reserved » that Arizona takes with the fingertips. Two black leather seats surround it, forming a right angle around the small table. 

- Leave me your jackets, I’ll put them in the cloakroom if you want. April and Amelia comply directly, Jackson doing the same. - I keep it with me, I finally tell Arizona that was holding out a hand. - Anything else you would need? She asks with a big smile. - It’s perfect Arizona, thanks for everything… I doubt that it should not have been easy to find a table. - Don’t worry about that… if everything suits you, I’ll come back later to make sure everything is fine. I briefed my security staff and they will be particularly vigilant tonight. Enjoy the soirée and I send you Tom. See you later! - Thanks again Arizona… She smiles at us one last time, then turns and disappears quickly among the other patrons, a Veil of mystery and grace surrounding her. I fix her for a few seconds then redirects my attention to the table she had prepared for us, noticing April, Jackson, and Amelia already sitting on the two seats. I  take my place, imitating them: April and Jackson sat on the seat set aside from the dance floor and I sit on the left of Amelia. - What do you want to drink? A male voice above the music shouts to us, and I discover in front of us, a young man in a suit tie, a tray in his hand. - A vodka tonic, please, start Amelia. - A cosmopolitan for me, continue April. - Good and for you gentlemen? - Two lemons Perrier answers Jackson. The waiter leaves us on a smile and April quickly speaks again once he has left us. - Jackson orders for you Owen? April raised her voice… - Some habits that remain… - So without alcohol? - I drive… and O’ must stay lucid, alcohol is not good for reflexes you know… - Speaking of reflexes, Miss… I’d like to see if you’ve kept yours! April gets up suddenly and reaches out for Amelia. - April, we just arrived… - Exactly, we don’t waste time, the dance floor is waiting for us, come on! Amelia ends up smiling at her friend’s insistence and accepts her hand, letting herself be guided a few steps onto the dance floor.

They stay on the front of the dance floor, so I see them easily: I could not miss them, April’s white dress caught the rays of the spots and came out like a white cloud on the dance floor. This white bubble quickly oscillates as I notice that she is living in her flow of words as on a dance floor: she sways instantly, raising her hands in the air and waving her hair around her in rhythm. Amelia by her side is more reserved: she looks at her friend laughing, then begins to move at first shyly. But that’s without counting the fury of April, who grabs the hand of her friend and encourages her to dance a little more frankly, going as putting her hands on the waist of Amelia to forcer her to wiggle. Amelia lets herself go, losing herself in many laughs at April’s attitude and initiatives. Her smile never leaves her and was particularly pleasing to see. A man suddenly passes in my field of vision and I recognize the waiter who comes to bring us our orders. I grab a glass of Perrier while leaving Amelia’s vodka tonic face the place she had just left, finding her eyes… and discovering her, dancing this time freely, without the encouragement of April. - O’, I’m going for a walk around the room… - Ok, Jackson, see you! Jackson slips away without a sound to make tracking of the place while I keep my attention fixed on Amelia and April. I don’t take a while to notice that I am not the only one to observe them, I perceive several men by their side, watch them dancing with interest… and follow Amelia as she launches a few words to April to finally join me.

She smiles at me and takes her place by my side. I give her her drink which she accepts and she takes two sips one after another. - She exhausts me every time, she said, smiling while watching April, still in action in the middle of the dance floor. - In any case, she gave you a smile, it’s nice to see. She smiles a little more widely, then takes a surprised look on her right. - Did you lose Jackson? - He went for a walk around the room… - You seem very accomplice both. - We know each other well… we worked a long time together, I know that I can trust him, it’s important in my job to have someone reliable. - You worked together… in special forces? - Yes, we have often been in a teammate… especially on my last mission… My eyes are lost in my glass in front of me, the memories of another era coming back to my mind… but they leave immediately when a voice calls out us. - Hey, what are you doing here! Amelia, you said two minutes, it’s been five minutes that I dance alone! Exclaims April joining us. - You should do a little break too, you will exhaust yourself otherwise… - I will hydrate myself a little but then we go back! She recovers her glass on the coffee table and I remain impressed seeing her finish her glass almost in one gulp. - Ah, ladies are back! Jackson was coming back from his little round and just waving his hand to tell me that everything is ok, sitting down next to April. April then makes a sign to a waiter and orders a second round to Amelia and herself, noticing that our glasses to Jackson and I are almost full. The waiter comes back in less than a minute with two more cocktails. April takes a generous sip of this new glass while Amelia is only three-quarters of the first when her friend hands her the second.

The heat of the place weighs on more and more and I end up leaving my jacket and place it against the seat behind me. - You should have entrusted it to Arizona, Owen. - I prefer to keep it near me… - Do you hide a weapon? I just smile without answering her clearly. A presence is approaching this moment from our table and I recognize the owner of the place, Arizona Robbins. - Re-hello, everything is fine? - Yes, everything is fine Ari, the music is always nice to you, answers April, the glass in the hand. - Good! If you need, you know where to find me… and we’re going to start a Latino hour, so find yourself a good partner, they are quickly stormed by all the girls of the night club. She waved her hand and joined the next table, apparently taking great care of her patrons. - Amelia, you heard… a Latino hour, it’s great, we need to find a great dancer among all these young men to learn, says April ending with a wink. - April, salsa, it can’t be learned in five minutes… - The basics are not complicated, says Jackson. Amelia and April turn their attention instantly to my teammate while I look sternly at him… to keep quiet. - And how do you know that Jackson? Do you know how to dance salsa? April’s insight confirms in three seconds what I feared, Jackson had already said too much. - Yes, but I’m not the only one… Amelia turns her head in my direction but I carefully avoid her eyes. - And where did you learn to dance salsa? A new melody surrounds us: the electronic tones have disappeared to give way to percussion and guitar tunes. I meet Jackson’s eyes but he opens his mouth before I dissuade him - A month of mission in Cuba… - Jackson, it’s been a long time… - The memory of the body is the most resistant O’, you know it well. I take a sip of my Perrier while feeling the eyes of April and Amelia on me. - I would love to learn, announces suddenly April. Who is the best teacher between you two? - Owen is the best in a lot of things and in this area too, I think. I instantly look at Jackson and am not surprised by noticing his legendary teasing look on his face. - Can you show me, Owen? - Jackson is too modest, he is much better than me to teach you the basics, right, Jackson? I ask him the question as a challenge, ending with a wink: he answers with a smile while standing up. - Come April, I’ll take you to Cuba! April turns to Jackson smiling, letting herself be guided to the dance floor. They walk a few steps in front of us and I watch Jackson give directions to April who listens carefully. Then he tells her how to place herself: he then holds her firmly by the waist and with one hand, and leads her in first steps… at first uninsured and then more precise. A sound of glass sounds to my right and I discovered Amelia take a sip of her vodka tonic, shifted on the second seat, to observe April and Jackson… I quickly detach myself from her image to discover our friends in front of us, among other couples, and revealing a certain grâce in their movements. - They are doing well both… whispers Amelia by my side. I look down at her again; she’s smiling, her eyes are on April and Jackson, and her feet are beating music unconsciously. My eyes remain fixed on this part of her body that seems to ask only one thing. - Do you want to try?

Thank you for reading 💛

[nutbrain]

How to Block a Number

So funny story, I actually wrote this before @kiruuuuu released her Ivan fic for recruitverse (which as you can see I’m simply enamored with and highly recommend y’all read) but I never got around to posting this. So here it is :) There’s a few bits of the Spetsnaz, but most of it is centered around Ivan.

It was a quiet day when Shay approached Ivan.

“How do you block a phone number?” Random questions were no strange thing from Shay as his mind quickly jumped gaps from one topic to another, but Ivan didn’t think he liked where this was going.

“Depends on cell service. Why you need to block number?” Ivan hauled himself up from the reclined position he’d been in on his bed. It was just the two of them at the moment, the other three doubtlessly still being run into the ground by a furious Blackbeard after they’d replaced all of his shields with plastic wrap and wire. Shay bounced awkwardly from foot to foot.

“Well, I got a text from this one guy that said Jojo gave him my number because he’d thought we’d be good together. He was nice enough at first, but then it got…weird? I don’t know, it’s probably stupid.” Shay was playing with the bottom of his sweatshirt, but finally looked up, embarrassed and somehow expecting to receive judgement from the large Russian.

“Not stupid. What did he say that make you uncomfortable?” Ivan slid his phone away and made sure to give Shay his full attention. The other man maybe twenty-four, but he was still innocent to many of the things that happened in the world.

“I don’t know. It’s hard to say. But he kept asking about my age and didn’t believe I was as old as I said. Mentioned it was really hot that I looked underage and I…it just made me feel kinda gross, ya know? But don’t tell Jojo, I don’t want to hurt his feelings because this didn’t work out.” Ivan highly doubted that Jojo had passed along Shay’s number, especially given the German’s growing attachment for Shay. However, Ivan would respect Shay’s wishes and nodded.

“Give phone. I will get number blocked in town.” Shay smiled gratefully, visibly relieved as he passed over the phone. Ivan knew full well he didn’t need to head into town to get the number blocked, but after procuring the passcode and waiting for Shay to leave, Ivan opened up the messages. He didn’t snoop in his other texts, but quickly found the contact that Shay was upset by. The last message exchange had involved a variety of eggplants and water droplets, to which Shay had merely responded to with a question mark. Whether or not the Brit actually knew what they meant was inconsequential. Ivan scrolled up a bit to see that the other man, marked ‘Jojo’s friend’, had been pestering him to visit him in his home. Ivan did not like that.

He scrolled back down and typed in the text bar ‘I’d like to come over. You home?’ Not even a minute passed until the stranger responded with the address followed by ‘See, I knew you’d come around eventually babe.’ and ‘I’ll make us some drinks, though you look too young to buy alcohol ;)’ Ivan did not like this one bit. He was now convinced that this had been Jojo’s creepy date that kept asking about Shay’s age. Jojo had not been amused and promptly kicked him to the curb, but apparently not before he’d lifted Shay’s number.

Now that he’d gotten an address, his next task was to get into town. After throwing on civvies, Ivan wandered to the Spetsnaz quarters and knocked on the door. Fuze opened after a minute and quirked an eyebrow.

“Is Glaz here?” he queried in Russian. The Uzbek nodded and stepped aside to allow him in. Fuze pointed him to Glaz’s room and trudged back to the living room couch. Ivan was used to the operator having very little to say and appreciated the efficiency of it all. After knocking and getting a response, Ivan stepped into Glaz’s quarters and glanced around. The walls were adorned with colorful paintings, vibrant against the otherwise boring walls. The bed was neatly made, and aside from the giant paint covered sheet on the floor, everything was incredibly orderly.

“Good afternoon Ivan. Did you need something?” Glaz asked in Russian as he turned his attention away from the canvas he was currently working on, filling it with bright yellows and oranges. Ivan didn’t know what it was supposed to be just yet, but trusted the sniper had a plan to bring everything together eventually.

“Yes. I was wondering if I could please borrow your car? I have a few errands to run and it’d be easier to drive than take a taxi. I’d be happy to pick up anything you’d need while I was there.” Glaz hummed, wiping of his hands before standing up and fishing his keys out of a glass bowl on his dresser.

“As long as you don’t scratch it up.” He said teasingly as he tossed Ivan the keys, “If you have time, would you be willing to pick up some paint for me? I’m nearly out of yellow.” Glaz smiled, gesturing to his canvas, and opened up a drawer, pulling out his paint set to show Ivan the brand name and what the tubes looked like. Ivan noted that Glaz was also running low on several other colors, though none nearly as low as the yellow. The sniper fished out some money to cover the cost after Ivan agreed and wished him good luck getting his errands done. On his way out, he nodded to Fuze who gave him a short wave before turning back to the TV.

Finding Glaz’s car was simple enough and he ran a quick check to make sure no one had slit the tires or dinged it while it sat. Once he started it, Ivan ensured the brakes worked; Kapkan had recently upset Jager and he wouldn’t put it past the mechanic to try and get revenge. Though Ivan doubted the revenge would be anything this extreme, he also was well aware that Bandit was extremely vindictive, especially when it came to teammates. With his ability to stop the car once it started moving intact, Ivan put the address into the GPS of his phone. It wasn’t a long drive, but boring; the radio was playing nothing good, so he switched over to the CD player. The only two discs were The Cranberries and Three Days Grace. Ivan thought this combination of music was strange, but had no doubt that saying something about it was a bad idea.

While he was still driving through a relatively empty road listening to Dolores O'Riordan belt out “Zombie,” Shay’s phone buzzed in his pocket. Ivan tugged it out, careful to keep an eye on the road. ‘Can’t wait to see you gorgeous’ was displayed on the screen, soon followed by another message which contained an image. Ivan debated opening it, but his morbid curiosity got the best of him. He regretted it instantly and pulled a face; this was worse than seeing the nudes on Sledge’s phone. Nonetheless, he responded ‘Be there in 30’.

Furious at how this person was attempting to take advantage of Shay’s innocence, Ivan thumbed the button to switch CDs. He turned up the volume and found an angry song from Three Days Grace to get him focused and picked up his speed a bit.

Ivan parked his car down the street after finding the address and scoped out the area. He always liked to have an exit plan should things go sideways and found several ways he could make a quick retreat. He’d concealed his handgun in the back of his pants, but had no intention of using it. This was a particularly seedy part of town, so Ivan figured he wouldn’t stand out too much as he walked past dilapidated buildings.

The apartment itself was in the basement of a three-story complex and he had to go around back to enter. Double checking the number, Ivan walked up to the entrance and ran the doorbell. The man on the other side opened the door with an excited look on his face that quickly fell.

“I’m expecting someone. You’ll have to come back later.” He tried to rudely close the door, but Ivan planted his foot in the way and pushed it back open. The man stumbled back and fell, letting Ivan get a good look at him as he scrambled. He was probably in his 30s, hairline already receding, but well built; strong enough to possibly overpower Shay. Whether or not he would was another question, but one Ivan didn’t ever care to find out the answer to.

“Why you keep texting my friend after he tells you not to?” He advanced menacingly before hefting the shorter man off the ground by his shirt collar, feet dangling as he stared wide eyed.

“I was interested, man. I thought he was just playin’ hard to get. Nothin’ serious, you know how it is sometimes.” Ivan narrowed his eyes, pulling him closer.

“Really? Because you made him uncomfortable. Commenting about age and pestering. You are fly. I crush fly, da?” The man shook his head, tears now starting fall as he blubbered. Ivan dropped him and pointed at the coffee table where there were two drinks.

“What you put in drinks? Hm, you drug him?”

“What? No mate, no I just…I just thought it’d help him loosen up a bit is all.” Ivan picked up both and passed them off to the man. “Drink.” Wide eyed, he downed both of them with no hesitation. Ivan figured either he hadn’t spiked the drinks or was in full self-preservation mode. Somewhat satisfied, Ivan grunted.

“Give phone. Unlock first.” The other man scrambled around in his pockets before he was passed the unlocked phone. Ivan quickly found Shay’s contact information listed under ‘Jailbait’ and deleted everything including what was backed up online.

“I deleted everything. Now,” he dropped the phone and smashed it with his heel “I’d better never see you again or” and he switched into Russian for this bit to sound more intimidating “I’ll end you faster than you can call for you mother. Clear?” The sobbing man frantically nodded, still continuing to beg and plead as Ivan left, whistling to himself as he walked back to his borrowed car. ‘Happier’ by Marshmellow was playing on the radio and Ivan decided to leave it.

He grabbed donuts to seem like he had been doing something important before dropping by an art supply store that Glaz recommended checking when he had texted him. The supplies were pricey, which explained why the sniper had probably not asked him to replace the others; more often than not, Glaz was left covering the bar tab plus damages. He wasn’t stingy though, and had bought Ivan a drink on more than one occasion. The Russian bought the four other colors that the sniper had been running out of, using a coupon to make it slightly cheaper before making his way back to Hereford.

Once he was closer to base, he filled up the gas tank and ran the car through the wash. Ivan always preferred to give vehicles back in better condition than what they were in before; it made it easier to borrow the next time he needed transportation.

Parking Ivan pulled his supplies out of the car before making the trip back to the Spetsnaz area. Kapkan opened the door and let him know Glaz would be back from the shooting range any minute before pulling him in to try some of Finka’s borscht. It was good and Ivan politely thanked her for letting him try it. He offered donuts, which were turned down by Finka but quickly snagged by Kapkan and Fuze.

True to Kapkan’s word, Glaz was back shortly and Ivan offered him the paint and a donut. Confused by the weight of the bag, the sniper peered into the opening. The look of pleased surprise on his face made the whole trip to the store worth it.

“You didn’t have to get all of these, though I admit I am running low. They’re expensive though, so let me grab you some more money to cover the price.” Ivan brushed it off, assuring him that the cost of the taxi would have been more than the tubes of paint cost. Glaz was grateful, smiling softly and offering to let him join the Spetsnaz movie night. He excused himself, citing that he had some more donuts to drop off before he could relax for the night.

That out of the way, Ivan made his way to the cafeteria where he was sure the other recruits would be. They weren’t hard to find; Jojo and Valenti were currently in the middle of a row as Gian tried to distract them and Shay pushed his peas back and forth across his tray. Ivan slid into the empty spot that was always reserved for him and set the donuts down in front of the others who quickly swarmed the box.

“Where have you been all day? Thatcher was looking for you during afternoon shooting range.” Valenti demanded around bites of donut. Ivan shrugged and told him he had errands to run.

“Did you get it done?” Shay asked hopefully, smiling as Ivan slid his phone across the table. He’d deleted all the messages off Shay’s phone after he had forwarded on the evidence to himself, just in case he ever needed to deal with the man again.

“Get what done? What were you two up to while we suffered?” Jojo peered over, looking at the phone suspiciously and then back to Shay who looked the happiest he’d been in weeks.

“He blocked a number for me! The guy wouldn’t stop texting me to get me to hang out.” That really set the others off as Jojo, Valenti, and Gian asked him rapid fire questions, demanding to know why they weren’t informed. Jojo was outraged that Shay thought he’d ever try and set him up with someone who was such a pig. He went off on one of his signature tirades, but later Ivan overheard him quietly tell Shay that he was more hurt that he didn’t feel comfortable approaching him about it. After getting all the details from Shay, the recruits hustled back to their room and entered turtle mode once they arrived, wrapping Shay in blankets and assuring him he wasn’t ridiculous for feeling uncomfortable.

Once Shay was fast asleep with Valenti and Gian holding him close, Jojo pulled Ivan aside.

“What did you really do in town? You certainly didn’t need to go in to block the number on his phone.”

“I blocked number my way. I don’t think he’ll be bothering Shay again. If he does, I know where to find him.” Jojo smiled brightly at this, pleased with the idea of inflicting violence. The two settled back down into the dog pile of operators, eventually joining Shay in sleep.

[kpopchangedme]

Starboy III: Instability

Your night at the club turns sour, all thanks to that baseball player...

Mini-Masterlist || M A S T E R L I ST

Protagonists: Im Jaebum & You

Word Count: 1,7k

Genre: SFW – University!au – Baseball!Au  – Slight Angst – *Socially offensive language* – Mini-Series

Lysandre’s note: Is it you or Jaebum that’s acting like an ass?

Makayla shakes your shoulder to bring you back to the reality of the club, away from your first night with Jaebum. “Ever thought that maybe… Maybe, you’re so good in bed that he can’t stop thinking about you? It’s probably why he’s looking like a lost pupp–”

You almost spit your beer out, laughing. “No way! I bet he just can’t believe I’m not begging for more.”

“Yeah girl, why is that? I know I would.”

“He’s a fuckboy, I don’t need it that bad right now. Besides you’re the one who taught me all about the golden rules of hookups!” You shake your head, giggly.

“You hadn’t gotten laid in forever before I saved you and turned you into a wanton sex predator!”

“Hey! Lower y–”

“Who’s a sex predator?”, Sungjin reappears, with six shots full of clear alcohol and crashes your conversation, “Me?” You threateningly glare at Makayla as a warning, but she just shrugs it off and giggles with him.

Post-shots, you decide it’s better to give them both intimacy since he’s clearly into her and head towards the dancefloor, mind buzzing from the booze. After a few minutes of dancing alone to the beat, a stranger comes to join. Anything – anybody – to keep you away from that damn baseball player.  The man’s hands find your hips and you let him touch you, numbed by the Tequila, the beer flowing in your veins and the loud bass. Everybody around you two are grinding on one another, painted by red, blue and green spotlights. The whole scene is looking like a strange Warhol work of art. Eventually, after several songs, the stranger’s hands become too ambitious and you take your leave, heading to the bar.

Dropping your tipsy ass on a stool, you glance at the squad of baseball players to see what Jaebum is up to and if he’s still there – not that you care or anything. He’s drinking a pint of beer and you shake your head, disapproving. Drinking multiplies the risks of dumb injuries and poisons the body.

“A pint of red Keith, please” You request, thankful to the barman – Hey, you’re not an aspiring professional athlete.  

From the corner of your eye, you spot a tall model-like girl talking up close to Jaebum who’s ignoring her, surveying the crowd. That’s it, you think: his world. It’s full of lustful giant blonde cheerleaders. She’s like a Victoria Secret Angel, if you stood next to her, you’d look like a girl straight out of a cheap retail catalog… Even in Makayla’s dangerous dress. One of his friends, wearing the obligatory baseball jacket, leans between Jaebum and the bombshell.

“Hey man, we should go back before midnight!” He yells, loud enough so you hear him over the deafening music. Then again, there’s only one occupied stool separating you from the squad, you’re glad Jaebum doesn’t seem to have spotted you yet. He has power over you, it’s better if you avoid him altogether. Otherwise, you might betray yourself and try to jump him again. “You know, the rule–”

“Shut up, Jackson!” You lean closer to listen – healthy curiosity – and watch the teammate wince at Jaebum’s harsh reply.

The tall girl giggles stupidly. “There’s no curfew back at my place, Jae.”

“Do you think she left with that gross dude?” You almost choke on your beer when Jaebum ignores lanky-legs’ open invitation. You look up again, his eyes are wandering on the crowd, searching, but you don’t allow yourself to believe it’s for you.

“Well, I’m right here…” The girl pushes her boobs forward, annoyed by the lack of consideration and you smile in your glass. You’re weirdly entertained by all this, it’s clear he isn’t interested. Girl, move on.

“I don’t know dude, just text her.” The one named Jackson runs a hand through his dark brown hair, discouraged.

“I can’t.” At this, the girl rolls her eyes and leaves, although both guys don’t seem to notice at all.

“Go talk to her then, we only have half an hour left! Jeez, why do I even try?”

“I should – I mean... I will but-”

“Yeah, we’ve already had that talk, JB. I can’t tell if you’re drunker than I thought or actually nervous? Stop overthinking and do som-”

“I would, but I don’t see her!”

Frowning, Jaebum reaches for his almost empty glass of beer. Halfway to his mouth however, it happens.

Time slows down as you watch the scene unfolds.

In slow motion, you watch as Jaebum lets the pint slip out of his fingers. You stand up stupidly like you’d have the time to catch it before it shatters on the floor. There’s something odd about the whole scene as if he dropped it voluntarily. His hand completely opens when he bends his left elbow and the glass slips of his palm, before his arm falls back to his side, completely motionless. The pint explodes on the ground making everyone around him take a step back, laughing at his clumsiness.

“JB”, one of his other teammates with lighter hair chuckles, slightly embarrassed, “I think you’ve had enough!”

You frown when Jaebum stares at the mess he made in awe, clenching his left fist repetitively. Something feels horribly wrong, clearly, he didn’t drop that beer on purpose.

“I don’t u-unde–”

Before you can talk yourself out of it, you’re already crossing the few steps separating you, careful to avoid the glass shards. “Jaebum, are you alright?”

“No, I–”, the pitcher looks up, startled by the question, gaze hardening as he recognizes you. “Why do you care?”

Grabbing his jacket on his stool, he runs out, leaving you behind with his equally shocked teammates. Without thinking, you run after him, pushing a few people out of your way. When you exit in the parking lot, you easily spot him against a wall. He’s still staring at his hands, something is off.

“Jaebum...” He clenches his jaw and rubs his face irritated when you call him out. “What was that? Is something wrong with your hand?” “Just leave me alone y/n, please?”

“Does this happen often?” You ignore him, running diagnostics in your head. He’s a pitcher. It’s very demanding on the body, it could just be fatigue. It looked like a dead arm, one of the symptoms of shoulder instability. “Was it your pitching shoul–”

“What the fuck are you insinuating!?” He snaps coldly, making you wonder why you even considered he might be looking for you earlier. He’s hostile, you’ve never seen him like this. He’s normally polite at worse, playful at best.

“Your arm, Jaebum. Did it just simply stopped responding–” You try to reach for his left arm, but he instantly retreats.

“Don’t touch me!” For a second there’s something scary in his eyes, but then he softens, calming himself. “Listen, y/n, this is nothing. I’m sorry, I-I’m just – I must be really drunk that’s all…”

You smile reassuringly taking a step closer. “I just wanna help you.”

“I just shouldn’t have been drinking. You always say that. This is nothing.” He repeats, sighing, seemingly more relaxed.

“Jaebum, I don’t think that was nothing. I’m a professional, can I look at–”

“Don’t!” He quickly snaps, switching to angry again. He kicks himself away from the brick wall. This time he takes a step towards you and you back off, startled by his unexplained animosity. “You know, you’re really hard to read y/n? One minute you ask to fuck, the other you act like you don’t even know me!” He scowls, the scary sound making shivers run down your spine. “Then fast forward a few months and you’re after me again – but God forbid I actually ask for your phone number! After all that you were here tonight – hitting on guys whilst sneaking looks at me – Isn’t at least one of them waiting for you back ins–”

“JB, stop! What are y–”

“SHUT UP, Jackson!”

You glance behind, realizing two of his teammates followed you, witnessing his wrath. Biting your lips, you push the thought of them knowing about your hookups to the back of your mind, the opinion of his friends shouldn’t matter to you. Jaebum inhales sharply, picking up on his rant again.

“Look, I don’t want you to come acting like you care. This is nothing. My arm is fine. We are nothing.”

“WOW! I know that!” You shake your head in disbelief, you didn’t expect anything from him, but his words still hit hard. Then again, since you witnessed that incident, you can’t just walk away. You’d feel horrible if there was something wrong with him. “I just came to make sure a stranger’s pitching arm is–”

“Don’t touch me!” Jaebum backs off again, alarmed when you take a step forward with every intention of examine him. “You say you don’t know me – You don’t even want to know me. I bet you don’t even know my last name!” He pauses but you don’t say anything, desperately searching for the appropriate answer in the back of your mind. He needs to calm down, you need to make sure he’s alright. “...So, don’t ask me about my arm. My arm is perfectly fine–”

“JB… If she’s a professional, just let her have a loo–” Jackson tries to intervene but gets ignored again.

“–I’m fine!” Jaebum blurts out for all of you, the statement sounding more and more like a lie. “So just quit being a hypocritical bitch and leave me alone!”

You bite the inside of your cheek, more hurt by his words than you’d like to admit. Most of the things he said are true, but… Aloud like that… It does make you sound horrible.

“Right.” You turn around, hating yourself for tearing up over someone like him. He’s right, you guys are nothing, not even friends. Just two strangers with separate lives who had awesome sex – twice. You begin to walk away, accelerating when you realize the tears will really slip out and betray you. Briefly you slow down, hesitating for a second, facing away from his teammates. You’re still a responsible professional, working at the clinic… Well, at least you tried.

“Just make sure he drinks a lot of water. You all have a big game next Thursday.”

Mini-Masterlist || M A S T E R L I ST