#this made me feel ill.

[stil-lindigo]

lead balloon (the tumblr post that saved me)

if this comic resonated with you, it would mean the world to me if you donated to this palestinian family's escape fund.

--

no creative notes because this isn't that kind of comic.

I know I don’t owe any of you anything but I still felt compelled to write about my long term absence. And I feel far enough away from the dangerous spot I was in to be able to make this comic. I have a therapist now, and she agreed that making this could be a very cathartic gesture, and the start of properly leaving these thoughts behind me. I am still, at seemingly random times, blindsided by fleeting desires to kill myself. They’re always passing urges, but it’s disarming, and uncomfortable. I worry sometimes that my brain’s spent so long thinking only about suicide that it’s forgotten how to think about anything else. Like, now that I've opened that door for myself, I'll never be able to fully shut it again. But I’m trying my best to encourage my mind in other directions. We'll see how that goes.

I am still donating all proceeds from my store to Palestinian causes. So far, I've donated over $15K, not including donations coming from my own pocket or the fundraising streams which jointly raised around $10K. In the time since I made my initial post about where this money would be going, the focus has shifted from aid organisations to directly donating to escape funds.

If you'd like to do the same, you can look at Operation Olive Branch, which hosts hundreds of Palestinian escape funds or donate to Safebow, which has helped facilitate the safe crossing and securing of important medical procedures for over 150 at-risk palestinians since the beginning of the genocide.

[hinamie]

9 / 266

[idnwtdta]

I literally feel dead in a living body

[araekniarchive]

@mnvart // Kaveh Akbar, 'Calling A Wolf A Wolf' // @PinkRangerLB on Twitter // @kosmogrl // @devinsturk, '15 Proverbs for the Fellow Chronically Ill' // Jasmine Deporta // Anaïs Nin, House of Incest // the gentle wisdom uquiz by @inkskinned // Rora Blue, 'Sweet Dreams' // Hala Alyan, Dear Layal

[mmmairon]

I fear my hands may always be stained red

[inkskinned]

today i love the red metal crane in her long neck arching her body over the boston skyline, which means i am okay for a moment. when i am unwell, everything is a little ugly. i always tell myself look for the beauty but when it is bad, i will look at birds and sunsets and little ducklings and feel absolutely nothing.

when my brother got his puppy, i was in a deep depression. what kind of monster isn't affected by a puppy. i was gentle and kind to her - i just didn't have an emotional reaction. she's five now and i feel like i spend all of our interactions apologizing to her - i don't know why. i just didn't feel anything. how embarrassing. i feel like if i admit that, i'll seem cruel and jaded. it comes in waves. like, two months ago when i went out into the world - it was like that. life behind a pane of stormglass. a firework could go off over your head - nothing. like dead skin, no reaction. not to ice cream or rainbows or baby chickens. life foggy and uninteresting.

i love goslings again. i love their little webbed feet splayed over grass. i love good food and live music and long walks. i like puppies. i feel like some kind of my soul has been starved - i keep staring at everything with wide eyes, trying to burrow the sensation into my stomach. it's real. beauty is real. when it's bad again, remember this. i stop and smell the flowers, feeling cliche in the moment. i like the white-to-red ombre of my neighbor's roses. i like colorcoding and yoga and cold drinks. i try to pass my hands over every moment, feeling like i'm squeezing joy out of every instant. remember this. for the love of god, it's real - just remember this.

[emproleon]

Not the dragons- the rats.

[puppppppppy]

act 4 :(

@chipper-smol and i came to a realization

[theoldkyokodied]

normal guys in a normal relationship (giving you a not very convincing thumbs up). macdennis doodles from this week :)

[alicornze7]

Silly guys goin' on silly adventures:]

@rorydrawsandwrites's puppeteer au but the only difference is that jax gives consent

My contribution to this wonderful au has been long overdue:')

Rambling in tags ehe (cw: ribbun:p)

Well maybe it's not the only difference

[starlitmeadows]

Reunion

[fermentedgutz]

ok, hc time: trans luigi

i feel like bowser wojld b super confused and super concerned about luigi’s scars n act all defensive and protective, like, “WHAT?!!! WHO!!!! HOW DARE THEY!!!”

but eventually he’d understand and continue to love him😇😇❤️

[hinamie]

yuuji smiling and sukuna making a face like That did u really think i wouldn't do a panel redraw

[liibation]

Happy holidays @habitualtruant !!!! Heres my little bsd secret santa present to you :333

[cometshift]

[ID: art of subspace from phighting as a child, walking hand in hand with a tall figure who is meant to represent blackrock's leader. they are both silhouetted in black against a white, snowy background. subspace looks happy.]

and i held your hand through all of these years, but you still have all of me

[daiwild]

Wonder Girl V3:

But as mad as I was at Hercules for pulling that crap... I wasn't... I mean, I should've been... I could've been wrecked that it wasn't Conner, that he was still... gone. But... look at me, I'm not a big mess...

Meanwhile:

Tim beating up Dick in the back of a Waffle House just to get some Lazarus Pit Juice so he can revive his dead best friend