#this isnt smth i hate i promise

[standing-flowers]

trying to keep it together but my mum just gave me the "it used to just be me and you" talk that happens every day before my birthday and man what the fuck

[luck-of-the-drawings]

[<==PREV PAGES] [NEXT PAGE==>(not out yet.wait a year.or maybe more.imagine.]

saw alot of comments on prev pages; saying 'i HATE that mean teacher! im gonna FIGHT HIM!!' & i LOVE the energy!! it WOULD be nice. to have that catharsis. but the story of young tidestrider is Not one of catharsis. it is a story of being so small and so special and sucking so bad.

[d1s1ntegrated]

shiggy with a s/o who’s equally as much of a loser as him :3 like they probably met in a discord vc (he’s the mod) or a league of legends match and he probably hates them at first and then gets a lil crush on them when they helped him mid-game or smth!!

thank u <3

hi love! i am working on a full-length fic where this is literally the entire plot omgomgomg, i'll post a little snippet here!

its still a wip so it wont be perfect but its first person perspective in this part, and i'm thinking of going back and forth between povs to show shig and readers sides equally.

also, reader is fem/afab, same age as shig, and alt. she has a quirk, too (not a healing one either).

this one does include quirks also! but it doesn't get into them for a bit, just a few convos.

some tags for the work entirely: slow burn, enemies to lovers, dabi x reader, shiggy x reader, reader is Not mentally stable, but no one else is either, the server is all the LOV and some others, incel behavior, boys being gross

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i slide my headset off as we log off for the night and head to my bed, yawning as i climb in. i turn my lamp off and from my bedside table, i hear the infamous chime of discord as my screen lights the room. i groan and roll over, checking the message.

𝔡𝔲𝔰𝔱2𝔡𝔲𝔰𝔱

↪thx 4 playing tn, u weren't half bad

↪btw sorry for threatening to ban u for posting memes in general

i read the messages slowly and type out my response.

𝖙𝖊𝖒𝖕𝖊𝖘𝖙

↪gg dude, and np.

↪promise i wont spam ur precious server w memes again

↪gn bro

i turn my phone back off and close my eyes, only to hear my phone go off again. i sigh, contemplating on ignoring it, but i lazily grab it anyways.

𝔡𝔲𝔰𝔱2𝔡𝔲𝔰𝔱

↪would u ever wanna vid call :)

↪u can say no. its ok

i frown at the message for a minute. this is the same guy who, about an hour ago, was screaming at me for not being fast enough in game, calling me a fucking pleb.

but other than that...he was funny. and nice to talk to.

𝖙𝖊𝖒𝖕𝖊𝖘𝖙

↪for sure, we can tmr.

i type out a half-assed response but feel a ping of excitement inside of me. i fall asleep with my phone on my chest, waiting for a reply.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i wake up around 1pm, the daylight searing through my curtains. i feverishly reach for my phone, only to find it flung off the bed. i drape myself off the side to reach it, eager to read any messages.

i flit through the random notifications, only to find disappointment. i open up discord, wondering if maybe i just fell asleep with my phone on, but there's no response from him. i see him active and type out a message, ultimately deleting it. if he wants to respond, he will.

i haul myself out of bed and head to the shower, leaving my phone behind, slightly jaded knowing i was left on read. i let the warm water wash over me, soaking up the few minutes of peace before i exit and get dressed. i continue ignoring my phone until i hear a ping. i rush over to it, feeling slightly embarrassed that i'm this concerned already. i open discord again, expecting a message from him, but it's not there. instead, a string of messages from someone else sits unopened. my brows furrow and i open the dm confused.

𝙗𝙡𝙪𝙚𝙛𝙡𝙖𝙢𝙚

↪yo

↪u played ovw w us last night right

↪u should play again tn w me, pretty.

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again this is just a snippet >_< but i hope it tickles some anticipation ahhhhhhhhh. ik there isnt a lot sorry ;-;

[damagedcoda6669]

hiiiii!!!! i was wondering if u could share some of the most common to least common bpd symptoms?….and maybe ones u struggle with??? <:3

ive been thinking i have bpd for awhile,, (since i was 15,i’m almost 18 now) BUT i dont wanna self diagnose bc i don’t wanna offend anyone……is that offensive? to self diagnose? idek <:p

there isnt rlly least 2 most common, bpd is a spectrum and has a wide range of experiences!!! but i will list the diagnostic criteria 4 u, and explain it in a way some1 first learning abt bpd can understand ^w^

u must experience at least 5 of the 9 symptoms from the criteria in order 2 be diagnosed!!!

1: frantic efforts 2 avoid real or imagined abandonment; this does not include suicidal or self mutilating behavior covered in criteria 5.

this means an intense fear of abandonment. if u have bpd, being abandoned by those u love is most likely ur biggest fear. ik its mine!!! xD this can look like a number of things. this can include an avoidant attachment style, pushing ppl away becuz u feel a need 2 abandon them first b4 it happens 2 u. u might do the opposite and cling rlly hard. u might resort 2 manipulation tactics n threats 2 try 2 get them 2 stay even if its not in their best interest (not every1 w bpd does this, and not every1 w bpd doing this is doing it on purpose. ive done this in the past b4 i reflected on my own behavior and realized it was wrong. we r not abusers by default and we dont have bad intentions.) u might beg them 2 stay, promise them things, try 2 change urself 4 them, yell at them 4 wanting 2 leave. its terrifying what the fear might do 2 u.

2: a pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by extremes of idealization and devaluation.

this ones pretty simple, consistently unstable relationships throughout ur life!!! but it might get a lil confusing at "extremes of idealization and devaluation", so ill try 2 explain that using a term from the bpd community, "splitting". splitting is when u switch from one extreme view of a person, object, character, pretty much anything, 2 the opposite. it USUALLY means going from loving some1 2 hating them, but it can mean the opposite (hating 2 loving), and it can apply 2 anything, not just a person. a good example of splitting is when ur fp (favorite person, another term from the bpd community) disagrees with u abt smth, or u see them hanging out with other ppl, u mightve viewed them as perfect b4 and now u feel an intense hatred and can only see them as a bad person. 2 other ppl, experiencing such a drastic change in perception over smth so small is seen as ridiculous, but rlly its entirely valid. its part of the disorder, its okay.

3: markedly and persistently unstable self image or sense of self.

u dont rlly know who u r a lot of the time, u dont have a strong sense of identity, if any at all. u might change styles often, change the way u talk, the jokes u make, ur beliefs, ur interests, ur hobbies. u might find urself basing ur entire personality on those around u. a common experience is that when ur favorite person or favorite ppl leave u, u dont know who u r anymore, becuz ur entire sense of self was mirrored from them. its like being a chameleon, but ur constantly mirroring other ppl, and ur nevr rlly ur own person.

4: impulsivity in at least two areas that r potentially self damaging (the examples listed in the DSM-5 include spending, sex, substance abuse, reckless driving, and binge eating, but i will provide moar examples!!!); this does not include suicidal or self mutilating behavior covered in criteria 5.

this ones also pretty simple!!! but personally i find that i become moar impulsive while in a bad headspace, or while im having a bpd episode/suicidal outburst. moar impulsive actions may include property damage, physical fights, running away, cutting contact with ppl, getting in contact with ppl who u know r dangerous, etc. those r all i could think of off the top of my head and they may not be the best examples, srry!!! :(

5: recurrent suicidal behaviors, gestures, threats, or self mutilating behavior.

i would like 2 say that self harm doesnt just mean cutting!!! self harm includes burning, hitting, ripping out hair, picking at skin, stabbing, and many moar. personally ive always been a cutter and i started when i was 9 or 10, but i want every1 2 know that all self harm is valid and this is a safe space 2 discuss it. im not gonna make any1 feel ashamed of it <3 also!!! suicidal threats and gestures may come across as manipulative, but that is almost NEVR our intention. we may act out in suicidal ways becuz its the only thing that gets us any sort of attention or care that we desperately need. i dont give a shit abt "ew theyre threatening suicide 4 attention, lets ignore them" becuz attention is a basic human need, and some1 threatening suicide REGARDLESS of their intentions is always a concern. whether its a call 4 help or not, they need help. dont disregard their mental health becuz their suicidal ideation doesnt present in an "acceptable" manner. all suicidal ideation, IS suicidal ideation. whether its passive, 4 attention, active w a plan, its all valid and requires attention and care.

6: affective instability due 2 a marked reactivity of mood (eg, intense episodic dysphoria, irritability, or anxiety usually lasting a few hours and only rarely moar than a few days)

intense mood swings!!! u can feel happy one moment, and then switch 2 being depressed or anxious, and then go back 2 "normal" 10 minutes later. sometimes it just happens 4 no reason!!! absolutely fucking sucks

7: chronic feelings of emptiness.

this one is hard 2 explain and can mean varying things 4 different ppl. 4 me, it means i will never be happy in the long term (maybe with medication, but.. rawdogging life? bad idea) nothing gives me any sort of long term joy and i dont feel like i have a purpose. its like theres a hole in my chest that will nevr be filled. nothing will make me complete.

8: inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger (eg, frequent displays of temper, constant anger, or recurrent physical fights)

angy

(also not every1 w bpd gets in2 physical fights or r angry at other ppl often, some ppl r moar angry at themselves)

9: transient, stress related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms.

paranoia is a symptom of bpd!!! although its shortlived in nature, and as stated above, stress related. dissociative symptoms can also present in a variety of ways!!! u can present with a fractured sense of self which may actually lead 2 u developing headmates iirc, but with them usually appearing as other versions of urself. or u might just dissociate due 2 stress or ur brain wanting 2 remove traumatic memories, 4 me dissociating feels like the whole world is fuzzy and blurry and i cant form any thoughts or emotions. i have dissociative amnesia and experience memory loss when this happens, which sucks becuz i dissociate at least once everyday. my memories r incredibly spotty and unreliable, its liek my brain is made of swiss cheese!!!

personally, i experience all of the symptoms from the diagnostic criteria, and they all effect my life on a daily basis. but that isnt 2 say that u need all of them in order 2 have bpd, as i said b4, u only need at least 5!!! there r also different types of bpd (not medically, theyre labels created by the bpd community) look in2 it if u resonate with some of the symptoms but not all of them!!! a lot of ppl who suspect they have bpd but dont present in a stereotypical way often relate 2 the term "quiet bpd", i recommend looking in2 it!!!

self diagnosis is entirely valid, and most of the ppl who r offended by it r neurotypical or they dont have the disorders that ppl r self diagnosing with. it stems mostly from ableism towards autistic ppl, specifically autistic ppl who self diagnose becuz they know theyre autistic but dont have the resources/time 2 get a diagnosis from a professional. if u believe ur borderline, and u've done ur research, i believe u. self diagnosis is not actually offensive 2 those who have mental disorders, im pretty sure the bpd community is accepting of self diagnosis!!! and if u cant find a community of ppl who r accepting of ur self diagnosis, just know that i believe u and this is a safe space 4 self diagnosis and ppl w bpd :3

bpd is also incredibly hard 2 get diagnosed with. its one of the most stigmatized disorders and often mental health professionals have a bias against it. sometimes, professional diagnosis is not an option 4 us. i knew i had bpd 4 years b4 i was able 2 get diagnosed. good luck!!!!

[freakurodani]

top 5 haikyuu moments !! (can be particular scenes or episodes or arcs) :D

OKAY!!! so i had to gather visuals for this one bc i have many feelings about this!! I went for scenes that no matter how many times i watch, they never lose their magic for me, no matter that i know theyre coming, it still takes my breath away and makes me roll around with delight, these most of these i feel like are probably pretty obvious ones, they were meant to be impactful but ough, if they dont tear me up in the best way

SO IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER

1.

I mean, what can i say??? what IS there to say?? theyve been teammates for a few weeks at this point, but hinata has given all his trust to kageyama and in turn, kageyama promised to use it to its full potential. its also a promise for their rivalry!! like, okay okay okay think about it, with the context we have with Kazuyo, kageyama has *already* decided that hinata is going to be his someone better! he sees it innately and he wants to draw it out of him, and he's, hes trying to be *hinatas* someone better too!! do u understand *shakes you* do u see what i mean!!! i mean, im sure u do, im definitely not the first person to go insane about this and ppl have probably also said it in a way thats smarter than me but just, ough

2.

its,,,, its,,, the acceptance of it all,,, i just think about how *alone* kageyama must have felt after his grandfather passed, we see and know that hes not good at connecting with people. hes bad at communicating and hes sensitive and he's scared of getting complacent. like, the all youth camp arc and atsumu calling him a goody-two-shoes is kageyama struggling with how he is changing, how hes trying to incorporate the influences he's gotten from his betters, and he cherishes it, but he's also felt like the advice he'd been given didn't also mesh with certain parts of himself. or, thats how i read into it, anyway. he tries so *hard* to be what ppl need him to be, and he's *so scared* of being rejected again. and this is hinata (and the rest of karasuno) telling him "HEY! we like you! we think you're smart and you dont have to shoulder connection all on your own! let us help you connect with us in a way where you feel comfy too :)" and then they talk about how they want communication! and it works!! and i just *rips into a pillow with my teeth*

3.

HINATA'S PERFECT RECEIVE!!!!! so the inarizaki match is probably my favorite?? there are so many good moments but *this?* you wanna see me go insane? do you want smth thatll make me tear up? every time!! its just!!! a beautiful culmination of all of hinatas hard work that he's put into during the year! its his change of mindset! its his growth!! he's fallen a level deeper in love with volleyball and ive fallen a level deeper in love with his character

4.

halo around the moon <3 Tsukki's block, his hard work, his character arc and development and everything is just *chefs kiss*. i remember the first time i watched the show, i,, *hated* tsukishima, and i think we definitely arent supposed to like him at first, but GOD does that turn around!! and this moment just feels so *earned* and *epic* and in the end HE STILL ISNT SATISFIED!!!!! he STILL wanted more!!! this point was worth 100 god fucking damn!!

5.

im talking about the inarizaki match again!! but this time with a focus on Tanaka, who kind of struggled with this match! he was in a low place during it, felt stagnated and lame. Tanaka, as a character, i would say is best characterized by his mental fortitude and stability, funny enough. He's wild, but i think part of his visual design lends that as his base (since he's often compared to buddhas/monks). But in this match, we get more depth, we see him falter and struggle! it takes more than just a slap to his cheeks to get better (tho tsukishima does point out that he gets out of his depression pretty fast) but like, tanaka uses meaningful cognition to break his rut, and its also just like, advice that I've seen used for stuff like any kind of creative block as well. The visual during the animation, he's climbing up the stairs, he's slowing down, he's coming face to face with a canyon, a plateau. He sees two options, give in, or push forward and he picks "the cooler" one, and struggles forward, forces himself ahead! and kageyama backs him up too, by not letting him back down, assuring him that his usefulness hasnt reached its end and AUGH I LOVE A TEAM YALL

okay thank u so much for the excuse to ramble about haikyuu moments that mean everything to me <33333

[kaleidosouls]

SU reclaimed pearl rambles

im gonna use some annoying comments i got on my reclaimed pearl as a springboard for what i think could be interesting discussion because i think its good to engage with criticism/different opinions. but also if you talk to me like an asshole i want you to fuck off and i promised i wouldnt engage in that kind of stuff bc its not good for me and it doesnt Look good for me either.

so i can talk about my thoughts but not engage directly, win win. its been months but im still really fond of the pearl i made specially this art. like it coudl be better but i like it well enough. just a little header so this isnt a boring post with only text

i think like, its good to establish ground rules that like, i think most of the poor reactions ive seen towards my art were missing, mostly in bad faith probably but in case theres ppl who earnestly want to understand. actually maybe i can format it like a little FAQ even though theyre not frequent or asked lskdjg just for outlining my points. ill put it behind a cut but ill frontline w this: if youre a fan of pearl in the show, this content is not for you. youre allowed to like whatever you want and so am i. if you like her, we probably wont get along and you probably will feel very personally irritated by how i FEEL about her, so just walk away now. im not gonna engage with petty shit taht juts boils down to 'im mad you dont like what i like'

onwards to more rambling / sorta responding to some criticism

i scrolled back and i guess i sorta never have actually done a proper full explanation post about this AU have i? or maybe i have and deleted it, i forgor

why did you change pearl?

because i hate her, simple as. i went from a huge SU fan to hating watching it (i did finish) and pearl is probably The biggest reason why, as like issues with her character seep into other aspects of the show that i also hate. like i mean i Realyl hate her. she makes the experience of watching the show really irritating and miserable for me. if you dont feel taht way about her thats totally normal and whatever but no one is gonna change my experience and feelings that i had watching SU since the 1st season was coming out.; anyway answering. there is a Lot i love about SU and want to engage with, so i had the idea of like,maybe ill just change pearl, cause i wanted to delete her, really, but she is one of the main characters and she hasa function as a character that you cant just do away with. essentially im just like, some guy, who draws, coping and trying to reclaim his teenage investimetn in this show. literally its just for ME. but if anyone else feels like i do, then they can enjoy it too. if somoene doesnt feel like i do, go watch like pearl fancams or smth. like ill never be able to literlaly change the show as it is, like its happened, and its a tragedy im trying to move on from (begrudgingly)

why do you hate pearl?

the long laundry list of reasons are probably apparent in the ways i remade her lol (theyre not i can tell ppl are gonna project whatever worst bad faith reason for any change i make) but tbh the core of it is this, which is like, beyond whatever traits she has and whatever: she reminds me of my abusers. always had, from season 1, but like it became worse as the series went on. its like really infurating and upsetting to watch SU bc of her. had my abusers been a different kind of person, maybe i wouldnt hate her so much (kinda doubt tbh). like her personality and behavior are like hough disgosting!!

why did you change (some physical trait about her design)?

i dont really necessarily have a PROBLEM with canon pearls design. over the years ive come to like SU's style less and less but like, gestures, whatever. like i didnt like it or anything but its not like a bit deal compared to the actual offender that is her personality and behavior. the reason i redesigned her at all is bc like, if i hadnt, i would still be thinking about the way she is in canon all the time. like ive visually associated her like, appearance with all the shit about her thta makes me upset so i had to so she didnt look like the same person anymore, and i can try to let go of some of the hatred in my heart. like i want to think about the thigns about SU that i loved and also the potential i always saw in it and canon pearl is like, an active obstacle to that, to the point taht i cant even see her without getting like irked. i tried to keep enough similar traits so from a glance youd be like, who the fuck- is that pearl? rather than like. completely change her entirely to whatever i wanted. i do want to like, its a creative exercise. i want to try and change the things that would make me happy to see gone but try to work within the constraints of the SU we Did get as much as i can tolerate. bc like.... if the sky was the limit then at this poin wed just have to throw the whole thing away and start from scratch. like its kinda not really very salvageable, like im not rewirting SU to be like a Good show or fix Everything, its kinda too broken. im just chnaging enough so i can look at the actual show, screenshots, songs etc, and not feel overcome wtih like the grief and irriatation of how much it sucked ass. its just so i can enjoy more of it again

i dont like your redesign for (insert reason)

cool. thanks for your input. youre welcome! eat my asshole. seriously though, like, shrugs. i didnt make it for anyone other than myself. tbh im not fully satisfied with it either bc i think the SU style is kinda ugly, so im at a crossroads. should i mostly abandon the SU style? ive like, tested out tweaking things, it mightve been noticeable in screenshot redraws. drawing within the SU style is to create that coping 'oh it was totally like this haha' vibe but maybe im old enough to not need that anymore lol. like ive heard ppl say shit like shes ugly, or like sneakily trying to imply im like, got some agenda over beauty or racism etc. like whatever, think whatever you want, its not for you. go back to sucking up to rebecca or smth like i cant take the og pearl away from you still i am open for like that kind of criticism like, do i have personal biases affecting my design decisions? probably. i do try to keep aware of why im choosing certain things, but really in this case i cant emphasize enough how like, irritating it is that i have to change her design at all. like its hard to come up w smth else when the rest of the cast ahs already been design to balance off the og pearl. i probably wouldnt change almost anything if the sight of her didnt piss me the fuck off! most of all i kinda wouldve preferred to keep her hair short bc it messes up the sillouete but it makes me think too much of canon pearl so i made it long :/ i was like let me tell you my design thought process: -im gonna try to keep as many recognizable traits about her design while taking away bit by bit until she doesnt look like the og pearl to me anymore and i dont feel angry seeing her. pearl is lanky, tall, spindly, with a gem on the forehead, blue white pink yellow pastel colors, large pointed nose. i kinda tried to keep these traits while slightly tweaking their design until she looked different enough. is it a good design? eh idk. like the purpose is to make me not hate her and it does that job

now this hate comment im gonna grace with keeping it intact except removing the person bc its not about them. its like, a very stupid ass headed comment but im actually kind of interested in like,jumping off of it to ponder some things

im not heterosexual or cis enough to know what exactly wife bate means in this context so im gonna like guess, that maybe i could extract this q from that reply (also not looking like shes from steven universe is a compliment thanks)

you took away her personality and made her boring

the only thing i can assume is that like, some people must interpret the absence of an assholey personality or like abusive behavior is 'boring'. i know thats a really bad faith assumption but like, if ive written down a bunch of personality traits and you still come out saying thats 'no personality' what am i to make of that lol. based on my experience like Existing online, people tend to often call nice characters 'boring', like dude ive done it before, but i think im kinda over that edgy phase. also again, its for me and not for you so if you think shes boring, thanks for your input i dont care. but thinkign about it earnestly, i dfeintely dont want to make a character thats just no flaw and not interesting ofc, i havent done that with reclaimed pearl. that being said i havent like, probably written a lot demonstrating what i want her to be like instead of the canon pearl so, maybe ppl just are feeling lost with the lack of information.

personally, if i hear someone thinks a character is boring bc theyre not abusive anymore like, nothing of value has been lost. but characters do need flaws in order to create conflict and cause things to happen, like in a way canon pearl is like All flaw, which wouldnt be a problem except she gets away wtih all the horrible shit she did. heres some traits i want to explore with reclaimed pearl, some are similar to canon i just wanna go about it a different way: being overprotective/possessive to steven in a smothering way, projecting abandonment issues, not reaching out/communicating her emotions properly, lacking indepedence/self worth, depending on others to avoid confronting her own issues, being very passive and insecure and lacking initiative (this being the totally opposite trait that canon pearl has), stunting stevens development due to her not being ready for him to grow up and not need her anymore. and more, this is just from the top of my head. maybe thats still too 'boring' for ppl because shes not being selfish and inconsiderate enough to others so you can relate to her but i dont care :p

gosh how do i go about like, presenting the content i ahve in my head for this AU).. i cantjust remake the whole damn show. i would if i could, tbh

i have concerns about racist implications wrt (insert thing here about my redesign)

imma be frank. i dont know how to compltely 'clean up' any possible bad associations wrt pearl as a character given how like, rebecca has literally like, made her to be a slave in love with her slave owner and made it to be like, an uwu ideal lesbiab thing for most of the show until they tried to pretend no we understood the flaws in this dynamic all along and its bad actually , uhh, anyway shows over haha

ill say the main reason i changed her skintone is, bc that would be the like most instant way to make her look differnt from canon (which is vital for me for the reasons said above), and i did consider like, does this make the whole thing worse, or, ?? like, as they made it in the show, techincally All the gems are slaves to the diamonds, arent they? including all the very totally progressive poc based gems including and specially the ones who are made to be understood as black women. bruh like idk what to tell you this show is just fuckig bad sdlgkj like its just way too like, pervasive in my teen years forme to throw the baby w the bathwater entirely. and ill just straight up say it, like, im not a specialist on these topics nor do i hav ea position of authority to speak on about it. like the pearls read more clearly as slaves (very intentionally by the showrunners) bc they are meant to be subservient to gems Other than diamonds. and also bc they like fit in the stereotype of housemaid servant. like the rubies being made to just be forced to go and fight like they are slaves too, they have no rights and no like, authority to disobey or autonomy. but fsr like, slavery as in physical labor just doesnt immeidately set off ppls alarms as much as housework slavery does fsr.

i can only rly like change the canon so much and try to like, tweak things so it doesn feel as gross but i think for it to be cmpletely not insneistive at all youd have to throw away the whole show. and like i said, this isnt like me saying like im making the show good or as it shouldve been, im making it so I (and ppl who share my feelings about the show) can feel less shitty just thinking back to it. its just an exercise. im not like mass media im just one independent artist and shit will come out insensitve sometimes and im sorry but im also like, my art isnt meant to be representative and like, responsiuble for fixing all of society and racism like i actually cant do that. ill just do the best i can as an asian dude but like, if my work makes you upset, im sorry, but also just block me. like i cant please everyone. or like, even better, make YOUR take on pearl taht you feel would be better, like make the art you feel should exist.

this post is too damn long and id be surprised if anyone reads all of it but if you do, tahnk you! i felt kinda like ready to fight tonight so im triyng to redirect it from aggression to like, thinking. i cant guarantee im making new content for su reclaimed anytime soon but i would really like to, tbh

[kurtmustdie]

every female protag in warriors and if they've had babies OR a love interest:

Squirrelflight: Yeah. god poor poor squirrelflight

Leafpool: Yep. StarClan hates her even though they made a prophecy surrounding her children. StarClan pick a side is it good for doctors to have kits or not because you arent helping your case here

Tawnypelt: yea

Feathertail: WHOA feathertail is the only one without an explicit love interest or kits!! but she died and is now trapped in the mountains arcs. oops.

Hollyleaf: died before she could have kits but she and fallen leaves are mates apparently?? i dont think this counts because it was AFTER she died that this was confirmed.

Dovewing: yeah

Ivypool: yeah also where did fernsong come from i feel like he just materialized to be ivypools yellow wife

Sparkpelt: yeah

Needletail: pretty sure she was in love with Rain or smth and maybe alderheart? anyway she fucking die d before she had kits. womp womp.

Bristlefrost: was sent to turbohell. HOWEVER she and rootspring were apparently in love for some reason

Frostpaw: apparently has a crush on splashtail and i swear to fucking god erins if she somehow has kits after her bottom surgery or is then turned into the "sigh. i just wish i had babies. sigh sigh sigh." i will kill everyone in this room and then myself.

Sunbeam: her entire arc is "i like nightheart" and vice versa. no kits though. but that isnt a promise.

so basically they have kits or are dead unless its the most recent arc which isnt even over yet. take that as you will.

[the-boy-who-drank-the-stars]

poem as promised :3

(now with the intended formating!!)

now if i may ramble about this, cause i wrote this cause i was sitting in the woods and just describing it but also

smth about how the broken walls imply the existence of something before, a home before this. A home no longer lived in, being more and more ruined until it will crumple fully to dust (moss breaks down rocks overtime i think) until there is no longer a shadow or a ghost of what this was.

pioneer refersed to both moss, a pioner species, and the colonizer. Colonizer has a negative connotation (mildly connecting to “the things we shouldnt have done”). So we shouldnt have built these walls here. Shouldnt have built this home.

“Mark the borders of nowhere now” is because the stone walls in the woods are actually marking of properties and the properties dont extend there anymore, they werent the walls of a house, but also the house is gone, what we built to mark our place in the world is gone.

quiet and birds clash cause youre talking about birdsong hence not true quiet idk what that means but i like how it mingles in my mind

“in between the things we shouldnt have done” was just me hating on urbanization/how the suburbs are surrounding this peaceful place. But it also adds a tone of regret. What did we do? Why is this house abandoned and rotting and becoming more and more of a ghost?

there is an old telephone pole over the creek in those woods, it connects the ew of urbanization to the woods i like. So a place you love with something you dont love, something that is both good and bad. Melancoly. The bittersweet of a home you lost, the good memories and the painful reasons and fights that cause you to leave, for it to now be only stone.

rotting also brings in the sense of this thing has ended and isnt coming back.

so two places, the modern and the forest, the bad memories and the good, or maybe the modern is the good because its houses are lived in and the forest bad because it is abandoned. Who knows. The bittersweet of a home existing yet being long gone now.

“we’re in nowhere now” shows that the house is gone, but also that this isnt just empty forest to move into, or modern houses to live in, this is a third place. A nowhere. The things that distinquished it are gone.

the “darling i hope you had fun” shows that the speaker might have been the one to live in this now abandoned outline of a house. So i hope you had fun with what we did and how we lived here. But also with a hint of emotionlessness?? Idk why i read it that way. But now our home is gone, it was good while it lasted.

uhhhhh i rambled…. Anylizing a poem i wrote with no meaning… and found smth in it idk uhhhh okay bye

finally ready to release this

the world desevre st o see it

um

wow

i love it so much

my favorite part is the colonizer analogy

it makes me djhewkfgkwljdkqwehkegr

jkelhfwkrgehjrkjwdkhrge

sorry im fangirling

im such a huge fan of your wriitng

and you

[lyubochka]

i treat ask games like surveys this is make me admit stuff by lost-head-adventure or smth idk its deactiviated

Would you have sex with the last person you text messaged?

not including messages i consider too private to share on tumblr. yes

You talked to an ex today, correct?

nope.

Have you taken someones virginity?

no i dont think so. all of my partners have been more experienced than me

Is trust a big issue for you?

yes ): im working on it

Did you hang out with the person you like recently?

i like lots of people but as far as "crushes", no not recently. i should though

What are you excited for?

my partner system to get home from work. our next grocery run. autumn. my birthday next month

What happened tonight?

i posted about that today but, other than all that, i ate some pizza... honestly i should write or record or something tonight

Do you think it’s disgusting when girls get really wasted?

no? wasted chicks are super funny

Is confidence cute?

confidence is hot yeah

What is the last beverage you had?

a monster. i should get water or something

How many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust?

none but i dont really talk to a lot of people. only the women in my family and i cant trust them. its not about being the opposite sex tho

Do you own a pair of skinny jeans?

yes

What are you gonna do Saturday night?

its sunday rn but yesterday i cried so hard i gave myself a headache and listened to a new album

What are you going to spend money on next?

probably a new microphone or sushi

Are you going out with the last person you kissed?

yes

Do you think you’ll change in the next 3 months?

yes? of course

Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything?

my partner system, but specifically mar, rich, robin, and trent

The last time you felt broken?

today at like 7pm

Have you had sex today?

yeah lol <3

Are you starting to realize anything?

being 23 aint shit. i dont know fuckin anything.

Are you in a good mood?

its alright. could be better

Would you ever want to swim with sharks?

yeah theyre chill

Are your eyes the same color as your dad’s?

no thank gawd. otherwise id be the type of douchebag to go around calling my shit hazel.

What do you want right this second?

a haircut... jack... a punch to the jaw. (not sft text beyond this point to the end of the answer) to be dressed up in vinyl lingerie to match someone elses military gear and ride his dick while gagging on his fingers

What would you say if the person you love/like kissed another girl/boy?

nothing. id end up in jail

Is your current hair color your natural hair color?

nah i recently dyed my roots again. its black but im a natural blonde

Would you be able to date someone who doesn’t make you laugh?

usually people who arent intentionally witty are unintentionally hilarious so thats hard to picture. but if our humor just isnt compatible i mean. maybe. probably not tho that speaks to a lot of other shit

What was the last thing that made you laugh?

@fuckin-pistol-whipped's replies

Do you really, truly miss someone right now?

yeah. sunset eyes, if this somehow gets back to you, im sorry i didnt give you a better warning. ill be back sooner than you know. it wont be months this time. i want to figure something out but i dont want to keep giving you half promises. soon, i dont know when. i love you. it means something, i swear.

Does everyone deserve a second chance?

yeah id say so

Honestly, do you hate the last boy you were talking to?

sometimes <3

Does the person you have feelings for right now, know you do?

oh yeah for sure. i think we're in a situationship. maybe we're dating? idk i cant rember. god i need to see him again soon. i should watch some videos or smth

Are you one of those people who never drinks soda?

nah but i usually drink diet soda. if im buying it out at like a gas station or smth ill go full sugar cuz its just a one time thing but. i think i drink two diet cokes a day. i dont always finish em

Listening to?

+ shuffle queue

Do you ever write in pencil anymore?

yeah but i prefer pen tbh. i keep like two hand notebooks a pencil and a pen on me at all times

Do you know where the last person you kissed is?

probably at his house with his cats. or with his band

Do you believe in love at first sight?

i believe in instant chemistry but love is kinda something u collaborate on. its like a living thing. ive recently figured out that two people can be in love and still wanna maim each other a little bit from time to time

Who did you last call?

@fadenkreuze but thats like a given. it was @antichristxsuperstar in front

Who was the last person you danced with?

my cat. it counts, in my book

Why did you kiss the last person you kissed?

we were having sex and i guess my mouth just looked that good hanging open and drooling

When was the last time you ate a cupcake?

i dont think its been a year but. it was probably springtime i wanna say-- no, late winter. valentines day cupcakes. mini ones.

Did you hug/kiss one of your parents today?

nah im not a hugger. he knows i like him ok tho

Ever embarrass yourself in front of a crush?

i dont believe in embarassment. but yea sometimes i make a fool of myself. usually it makes em giggle and then its fine <3

Do you tan in the nude?

i do a lot of things in the nude but i dont tan. im goth so

If you could, would you take back your last kiss?

i dont remember it

Did you talk to someone until you fell asleep last night?

yes actually it was rich. hey rich

Who was the last person to call you?

Do you sing in the shower?

yes sometimes but i sing all the time

Do you dance in the car?

Ever used a bow and arrow?

Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer?

Do you think musicals are cheesy?

no theyre an art form. i think A musical can be cheesy but not all of em. having said that ive never been a huge theater person but ill watch a bootleg every now and then

Is Christmas stressful?

it doesnt have to be but some people make it stressful. its lonely tbh

Ever eat a pierogi?

yep. theyre p good

Favorite type of fruit pie?

peach

Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid?

equestrian, veternarian, rockstar.

Do you believe in ghosts?

"do you believe in barometric pressure" "do you believe in wool fibers" "do you believe in the oxidation of metals"

Ever have a Deja-vu feeling?

all the time

Take a vitamin daily?

Wear slippers?

yes and i encourage others to do so as well

Wear a bath robe?

nope too warm and humid where i am

What do you wear to bed?

the buff

First concert?

it was a festival for nu metal bands in like 2008 or something. metalfest i think it was? or something close to that name. i dont remember all the acts that played but mudvayne was there i know for sure

Wal-Mart, Target or Kmart?

in my town theres only a walmart but i prefer target

Nike or Adidas?

Cheetos Or Fritos?

fritos are more versatile. remind me of chilis and soups

Peanuts or Sunflower seeds?

Favorite Taylor Swift song?

Ever take dance lessons?

Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing?

yeah. professional cocksucker

Can you curl your tongue?

some people cant do that?

Ever won a spelling bee?

this is a traumatizing memory for me i refuse to elaborate

Have you ever cried because you were so happy?

yes often. usually during sex

What is your favorite book?

i hate these questions cuz then i forget every single book ive ever read. idk ill say the most recent book i read. the long hard road out of hell by marilyn manson

Do you study better with or without music?

with but it has to be instrumental or so loud its mind numbing owwww speaking of my ear fuckin hurts fuck you billy corgan

Regularly burn incense?

not anymore

Ever been in love?

Who would you like to see in concert?

obvious answers are like. mm. nin. slipknot (but like in 2002 or smth).

What was the last concert you saw?

in person? i dont even remember. its been over a decade

Hot tea or cold tea?

cold tea always preferable

Tea or coffee?

coffee. also cold

Favorite type of cookie?

sugar cookie or chocolate chip

Can you swim well?

nah

Can you hold your breath without holding your nose?

yes??

Are you patient?

extraordinarily

DJ or band, at a wedding?

either or. both? both

Ever won a contest?

nope

Ever have plastic surgery?

nah

Which are better black or green olives?

ew

Opinions on sex before marriage?

theres another type of sex?

Best room for a fireplace?

the den

Do you want to get married?

yes

[gardens-of-may]

ENTRY THREE - chap. 50 to end

spoilers ahead

i don’t remember what happened 

yay

i know what happened tho

i’m not going to tell you 😋

suck it ha!

wakey wakey 

katharine hmm

A SCAVENGER HUNT?

WHAT

THEY KNOW EACH OTHER???

YES PEOPLE WHI ARE RACIST GO FUCK YOURSELF

AND MAKE JT HURT

WHAT

WXCUSE ME

WHAT THE HELL

saturday mornings

not a scavenger hunt then?

SYOP WITH GEB POV SWICTHSZ

i js realized both of the boys are dealing with their fathers

skye might be a pretty name but the human is actually vile

hmm

MY GID SAVANNAH

if gray hurts himself I WILL SUE

HAHAHA HIS HELLO THING IS THE CUTEST EVWR

IM GONNA CRY

CRY INTO MY BOWL OF INSATNT RAMBEN

ehehehe thomas thomas?

EW EW EW EW EW EWWWWW EUGH EW EW EW

EAHEHEJ SEE JDWB CSS EJR

WHAT THE FUCJ IS THAT BITVH SOING HERE

IM GOING TO FUCKING MILL HER

IT ACTUALLY THAT BITCH ISNT A PERSON

bitch…

YOU WILL BE FUCKING DEAD

AUGHHHH

THIS IS LIKE THE SECOND TIME GRAY HAS HAD A GUN PULLED ON HIM BECAUSE OF YOU

KYS

i bet IT sounds like a wet dog

but an ugly dog not a cute dog 

what the hell

LET ME JS EAT MY BROWNIES IN PEACE FOR GODS SAKE

no we no we NO. WE. 

AUGHHHH

bitch ☺️

KILL YOURSELT

she talks like she’s so wise and blah blah and respected but no

everyone HATES HER GUTS

DONT CALL HIM TAHT YOU ADRESS HIM AS FUCKING MR. HAWTHORNE OR SMTH STFU

you’re alone?

KILL YOURSELF THEN YOULL BE IN HELL WITH ALL THE OTHER DEMKNS

one

I DONT CARE NO ONE CARES

why I HATT YWOU

FUCK YOU

KILL YOURSELF

throw her in the pool 

DROWN HER

it’s a promise I WILL ENTER THIS FUCKING BOOK AND PUT YOU SIX FEET UNDER

WHAT HAPPENED

oh hi nash ☺️

AND XANDER AHENDKKW

anyway WHY IS GIGI UNCONSCIOUS???

oh

oh gigi 

awww ticklish gray 

i love her SO MUCH

FOUR CUPS OF COFFEE

MY GOD GIGI

omg it’s like me after the sols times one hundred 

I HATE POV SWITCHING 

I DONT CAREEEEE ABOUT JAMESON

well

anywayyyy

😕😕😕

please don’t get distracted, we know your girlfriend is hot but don’t

we’ll celebrate 

we know

le oop 

A HINT???

NOT A POV SWITCH

fhehsha HIS SISTERS 🥰🥰

NOT A FLASHBACK

eugh 

THROWING UP 🤮 

it’s her

em*ly 🤢🤢

ughhhhh

IM GONNA SCREAM WHERE IS MY AVERY

😳😳😳

NO???

EXCUSE ME

i don’t really think you do love them 

ARGH

WHACKING RN

oh. poor gray. 

LYRA 😍😍

she’s alive bro

OH MY GOD 

i’m back bitches

EWWWW

I CANNIT WITH BLOODY DIRT FINGERS

ARGHHH

bribing

my favorite 

GIGI 😭

no it’s alright girl i’d do the same 

oh. 

I LOVE ACACIA OMG

SHES WIDNERFUL

POOKIE

I FORGIT ABKR THE BUTCH

awww 🥰 

cookies 🍪 

😐😐😐

I CANNOT WITH THESE POV SWITCHES

UGH MORW BLOUD

AVERY WHAT THE FUCK

so no one won the game

JAHAHAH

oh ☹️

he’s really lonely 

IS IT THAT BITCH

EUGHHB EVEN WORDE ITS UGLY GUY

is he dead?

WHAT THE FUCK

HUH

EUGH

UGLY GUY WHAT

GIGI WHAT

btw maisie peters IS gigi

eve is a bitch who should be six feet under 

huh 

awww 🥰 

no now i’m crying 

ohhhhh shittyttttt

oh. 

AAYLDUXC

my heart HAS BEEN RIPPED OUT 

tears on my pillow 

THATS TERRIBLE MINDSET 

THAT FUCKING RXCUSE OF A GRANDFATHER MESSED THEM SO BAD

is zella alice?

she’s right. rich white boys het farrr in life 

oh

BRUH

LYRA 😍😍😍

BITCH WHAT DO YOU MEAN 

YOU PULLED A GUN ON HIM AND YOU EXPECT TO BE BESTIES

WHATTTTT

bitch jamie can’t even come

he needs to laugh

stop 💀

omg that would be fucking terrifying 

gigi and gray’s relationship means so much to me 

well i already knew that so hahaha

BITCHBBBHBBV

I HAVE NEVER HAGED SOMEONE MORE THAN THIS FUCKING BITCHASS IF A GIRL

why would you end a book like that?

now i am going to go chug some coffee and we are jumping straight into the grandest game 

the end. 

[takami-takami]

yes yes to everything u said.

i genuinely think ur literally such a good writer like not even just for hawks but for any thing the way u write or see things is just yes chef's kiss. its so true so many people have so many misconceptions about hawks, they love to dumb down him as sad and flirty its as if they only saw two scenes of him and ran with it.. they make him either a extreme pervert (wtf lol?) or "not touchy" also I bet hawks has had a cooking hyperfixation at one point but hawks is actually a really good written character ((most of the time hes just a dude but with a lot of hero training + wings) at first i never liked mha but i have sm appreciation for the characters stories, i hope tumblr doesnt eat this because i sent smth yesterday but i dont know if you got it (it was a fluffy imagine) sorry if u get spammed my phone is shit, i have literally so many random essays abt characters i promise u nobody would be complaining if u analyzed and made essays abt hawks but ur feeding into my addiction of birdman tho😔 point is : you actually see what he actually is lol he isnt stupid he knows what hes getting into.. about getting corrupted from work if that means he can save one more person, he's one of the few characters ive seen written well about lesser of two evils yk? i think thats why hes really likable but also upsetting, when having to do something when they "ask him" when it isnt really a " question"/"ask" its also annoying when people hate him for reasons *(esp with twice stuff)* when he didnt really have a choice under so much pressure and sm consequence.. his personality isnt only just work even though he doesnt get to explore his own likes often i really hope at the end of the manga or whatever he ends up okay cause it would be so tragic if he was a done deal and died or forever trapped in the hero stuff, i havent caught up with the manga i saw some spoilers and now i want too..but even if he does end up um.. :( .. it's okay cause he was still a good written character but he deserves to be in the story still lol

ALSO I DONT KNOW IF THE DOG THING WAS JUST ONE TIME THING BUT IT WOULD BE SO CUTE IF U NAMED HIM/HER and like we all accept the dog as your follower's inside joke and bring it up every once in a while or in other drabbles :) it was so cute ahhhshsh remember to take breaks if you ever need one - have a medal 🥇👺

AAAAAH I APPRECIATE THIS SO MUCH!! I love seeing other people pick apart the bird boy too. I agree mha is like, really fun because of the character stories in particular and there's so much care put into how they write hawks. I AGREE that Hawks hasn't had the oppurtunity to really explore who He is outside of his work, like so much of his identity is tied to that and I think he notices that too? It's part of why he thinks about a society where heroes are bored and have too much time on their hands so much (though I think his primary goal is that he wants to keep the world safe; if heroes have too much free time, that means there's no one that needs saving/help).

I may bring the doggie back!! I'm glad people like him <333

If they kill Hawks I legit will not be okay but I HOPE THEY WON'T TOO!!! HE DESERVES TO THRIVE AND BE HAPPY!!!!!

[powerpolyculeshowdown]

this is so far off the polyam subject but listen the orv canon mpreg is actually shockingly thoughtful and turned a minor character that was forgettably hateable into a character i really liked with depth and genuine growth and heart to him and it's also in the middle of an extremely Trans arc with a lot of gender stuff already going on and the character talks about how parenthood changed his perspective and despite wanting to hate his child she inspired him to keep going the mpreg bit is weird to think about out of context but it was good i promise it was actually good (i dont know how much Discourse TM there is on the subject bc i mostly see jokes about this so no need to post if u dont want because i dont want to start another Ugly Kim Dokja Discourse)

i dont see why there would be discourse because like mprog isnt necessarily smth bad?? i dont like it so i usually avoid fics w that tag cause i dont like to think about the logistics of a cis man giving birth but also i dont usually read anything w pregnancy in general tbf?

im happy to hear its sweet even if it might be a lil weird that mpreg was included, but its just a trope like many others im sure w a story as complex as orv seems to be theres gotta be other tropes that ppl would find weird. taking your word for it that its handled nicely tho!

[thisdreamplace]

how do you deal w tradgedies around the world? everytime i hear something on the news i get extremely sad. with the law its promised that we can do anything but i haven't gotten any *abnormal* successes yet, if i could revise every unfortunate event that took ppl's lives i would but i don't feel confident in my abilities. i feel totally helpless even with the law.

stop watching the news, to begin. idc what anyone says. i think these days people love pressuring n guilting people n being "Aware" and "woke" or whatever but tbh all that does is make people so grossly negative and hating the world. def dont need any more of that energy, imo, so i dont engage !

this world can be painful, yes. especially on that scale, where everything feels so scary n out of control. so yk what u do ? u stop trying to play god n allow urself to start where u are. what can you do to make the world beautiful ? in a way that feels lovely n accessible. personally, i know that me being full of anxiety and pain because of the state of the world isnt doing anything. but being a source of love, light, beauty, hope, peace, etc etc is doing smth and thats sm more important than just dwelling and thinking about how to fix it, while feeling like ur doing nothing beneficial. ur not helpless at all. i would just stay stop trying to rely on this idea of the law u have and rely on who are u in this moment, bc its exactly what the world needs. allow urself to see that. i dont think this world was meant to be fixed, bc this human experience relies on duality. so its not about being the entire world's savior, but being ur true self. idk it sounds so small in words but its actually the greatest thing.

[fictionkinfessions]

Just played my (alhaitham's) story quest and Im so!

Im not being crazy toxic to Kaveh oh my god Im just a low-empathy autistic and thus bad at adding in the little "I do actually care about you" tone behind my insults. Kaveh knows Im not being mean on purpose can we please not act like Im abusing him or smth. (p.s. Kaveh, look u said we hate eachother now and Im SO good at pretending to do that be proud of me please 🥺 /hj)

THE "I JOKINGLY TELL KAVEH TO PAY FOR SHIT WHEN I DONT ACTUALLY WANT HIM TO" WASNT SUPPOSED TO BE CANON HYV PLEAAASE I FEEL SO BAD FOR ALL OF THAT WHY'D U MAKE IT CANONNN. IT WAS JUST SUPPOSED A SILLY "MY TL" THING THAT I FEEL RANDOMLY GUILTY ABT CAUSE I KNOW HOW TO MAKE THINGS SOUND JOKEY NOW PLEAAASE WHY'D IT HAVE TO BE CANONNNNNNV FDBSGKBDSGKS

Kaveh I miss u I wanna be mean to u again (but with proper tone this time. I've learned tone SOOO much better in this life u'd be sooo proud of me for real you'd be SO proud I prommy 🥺🥺🥺 (Sorry I got random brainrot of wanting u to be proud of me I promise Im more normal than this))

And. Not Alhaitham but Dottore note. (might be a bit too dark of a joke for the blog, if so just cut out this next part mpc ❤)

Siraj u stole my look AND my tropes and were bad at executing both of them. "Alhaitham said my idea was bad" isnt good motivation AND we all know that manipulating people into ur hivemind isnt cool anymore, the REAL hiveminds make robots around their severed limbs. Fuckin poser 😎 /silly

~Alhaitham 🕯♟

p.s. Not rly needed but I wanna add that Kaveh was my FRIEND. We grew up together and he knew me better than anyone but dont read this as romantic please we were not romantic. (not shipping issue mpc, kinda just an overexplained big ole /p at the end of this kinfession cause Im VERY long winded rn sowwy)

]

[moriartyluver]

STOP NFR PLAYING WHILE THEY FIGHT IS KILLING ME

“I wouldn’t ever want to love you.” What if this was my last straw

Liam talking abt not being able to be a father is already driving me insane😍

PAUSE SHE TELLS HIM TO DIE

I wanna say that’s sad but I’m in a ‘I hate Liam’ phase so she eat with that

Only sad thing is the guilt she’d feel afterwards

Au where liam didn’t run out of brain cells and went with fl to her home country and she had the baby and everyone is happy

Oh and her brother flew out of the grave or smth

If there was even enough of him remaining to fly out, that is

NO THERE ISNT, THERE IS NOTHING THERE. ONLY HEART YOU HAVE ARE THE BROKEN HEARTS OF THE MFS WHO READ THIS FIC

🎀.

Also to add to this, liam has his back turned to her the entire time bc he can’t bring himself to look at her crying because of him

Tbh he isn’t lying tho. He doesn’t want to love her because he can’t be attached to fl otherwise the plan wouldn’t work and although he loves her, the plan is really important to him

To be exact, fl tells him to die and go to hell where he belongs and when she has his child, they will not know of him at all because of what a piece of shit she thinks he is and liams just stood there 🧍🏼

Tbh I might make the epilogue liam and fl being grand duke and duchess and having kids and stuff buttttt part 2 of mtp is still waiting

I PROMISE I HAVE A HEART I SWEAR. I TOTALLY DO NOT THRIVE OFF OF THE PAIN AND HURT THAT MY ANGST GIVES

[kxmikomrade]

oh ho ho

why hello there

I just read through a bunch of the stuff you have about yourself, and now you have to deal with me <3

so first of all: i saw that you really liked blue period, and I was wondering how you'd recommend it? I keep on wanting to watch it but my mind goes "but you have this thing" and "what about the other three animes you're watching" but who cares! It looks really pretty tho. Also me and my partner are going to watch Bungo Stray Dogs together (eventually-) bc it's his favorite anime lol.

ok next point: WATERMELON IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE FOODS I LOVE WATERMELON. MINT CHOCOLATE CHIP ICE CREAM IS THE BEST. and i agree, winter and autumn are the best seasons. rain. rain is nice :).

third and i think final thing: you're learning japanese, you say? ok, i have a few questions for you. what are you learning it on? (i'm learning it on the demon bird app, aka duolingo). what words have you learned? what do you know about the grammar/word structure? and the scary one: have you started learning the terror that is katakana? (if no, it's just another alphabet with the same order and sounds, except different characters. i hate katakana :,>) because i can't type in japanese on my chromebook, i'll just use the romanji. But expect me to send you random hiragana and have you say what it is!

Kimu-san, yahho! Anata ga kakkoii to karai desu yo! (i promise you it's a compliment <3)

try to tell me what that means, and expect more random japanese in your future :)

anyways have a lovely day byeee <3

when i saw the 'oh ho ho' i heard french venti LMAOOO 💀💀

omg new moot guys NEW MOOT !! u match my vibe so <3

BLUE PERIOD IS SO SHHEHEHEHHE esp if ur an artist like myself, it gives u a different and probably more professional view of art ^^ For wat i like abt it, i'd say da characters and how theyre written. The main character is pretty relatable. Theres another character who has family issues and may be trans (or genderfluid? it isnt confirmed but she was born male, currently dresses feminine and hates it when people uses her dead name). Another one who was born a 'Genius' but doesnt really understand art, hes only doing it bcs its basically wat he can only do. Another character who'm gets compared to her older sister and so on. Even minor characters have well written stories I suggest u watch da anime THEN read da manga from da beginning :>> Sanaol may partner- jkjk ur prob fil but imagien having a partner 😭 my lonely ass could never U SHOULDD WATCH BSD!! I LOVEEE DA ENDINGS ITS SUCH A VIBE AND DA OPS R BANGERS UGH THE CHARACTER DESIGNS AND PLOT I WANNA 👊 ITS INTERESTING BUT I SUGGEST ALSO READING THE MANGA FROM THE BEGINNING SINCE THE ANIME SKIPS ALOT OF THINGS AND IT MIGHT GET U CONFUSED 😭😭 Also, hes so true for that, hes DEF a keeper 💪 unless hes a mori/fukuchi stan then ew no

YESSS WATERMELON AND MINT CHOCO CHIP ICECREAM LOVERSS <333 Honestly, cold weathers >>>>>>

Im currently just memorizing da basics; hiragana and katakana before i continue off where i left off in grammar and vocab (i'll most likely start over since its been arounf half a year and i have goldfish memory 🥲) Ive already memorized hiragana, now im going with katakana but im focusing on art lately since i just got my stylus back so im prob not gonna do it for awhile but i'll try to before may >:DD I currently only use 'Write it Japanese!' app on mobile, its REALLY useful, idk anything to help with grammar but my jp speaking friend recommends da book 'Minna no nihongo'. She used to be my jp study buddy but shes been VERY busy with uni lately so :'''D AND YES BBG (can i call u dat??) LETS PRACTICE TOGETHER <33 tbh it would be better if we use hiragana/katakana/kanji (i literally dont know kanji SOBS) since it helps us learn!! AND DAT WOULD BE FUNN

From just my understanding: 'Kim-san, Yahoo/hello! Youre a cool person [smth smth]'

from google: 'Kimu, Yahoo! It hurts to think you're cool' (pls get ur shit together google 😭😭i couldnt call my friends bitches lovingly bcs of u)

YES I'LL BE EXPECTING THEM <33 I HOPE U HAVE A LOVELY DAY TOO HON

LMAO WAT DO I CALL U?? I WANNA ADD UR MOOT TAG