#this isn't mocking it always makes me laugh
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angry-eevee · 2 years ago
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My favourite way people are drawing Osvald is just
O_O
Above a rectangle/triangle of a body then slap a curtain of hair on top. Peak character design.
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youareinlove · 6 months ago
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Still waiting for Matty Healy to be roasted (forevermore) for the reveal on The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived like if anyone deserves to be mocked (forevermore) it's that guy. He should be in prison and yet people won't make fun of him? for what reason? Worst man of a generation.
we've been making fun of him plenty, believe me, but i think part of why it's hard to genuinely laugh at him is because the things he did weren't funny, they were just deplorable
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fallingformatt · 5 months ago
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SINCE WE’RE PLAYING GAMES M.S.
Matt x fem!reader
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summary: what happens when you try to cheat your way to win a game of twister?
warnings: SMUTTTTTTTT! unprotected sex, slight bdsm.
word count: 2.5k
a/n: Yall are some freaky fucking fucks… over a thousand notes on my post? Yall are insane, im so thankful for yall dirty minded ass people. I truly did not expect that to happen on my second post ever. And thank you all for almost 300 followers yall are the GOATS!!!
Let me know if I should write a pt. 2 for FIRST GLANCE M.S. available here
post is not proofread
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I'm currently at the triplet's house. The sun is setting, casting a beautiful orange hue to the living room where we all are sitting, drinking some drinks, and just talking. The music in the background isn't loud but I can hear it clearly.
"I'm bored, let's do something fun," Matt says looking down into his half-empty cup. "Well I don't have any ideas," Chris shrugs his shoulders. "I have an amazing idea," Nick yells, startling me. "Nick, you scared me, I almost spilled my drink," I say out loudly slapping his shoulder. "Please ask me what my idea is, please, please, please," Nick tries to plead to make us ask him what his idea is.
"So what is ur 'amazing' idea?" I ask looking at him with a serious face. "We're all gonna play twister," Nick says ecstatically clapping his hands together like a kid. "No Nick, we are not playing twister, we're not five," Matt says annoyed. "Oh look I'm Matt, I'm so tuff and boring, I don't like to have fun," Nick mocks Matt, making me and Chris laugh.
"Well I don't know about y'all, but I'm tipsy, there's no way I could play twister right now," Matt says tugging on the collar of his black t-shirt, his eyes from across the room to meet mine, sending butterflies to my stomach.
I've always had a little crush on Matt, but I never really did anything about it, because I didn't want to ruin the friendship between us. I mean yeah, sure I would sometimes tease him, wearing something revealing, making his eyes wander to places they shouldn't, for example, today, I was wearing short, low-waisted shorts and a small leopard print baby tee, but I knew that, me doing something with Matt would probably change the dynamics of the group as a whole, so I left it as is, hoping my crush on Matt would sooner or later die down.
"You're just scared that you'll lose, so I have a proposition, whoever loses takes a shot of vodka," Nick says proudly. "That's the dumbest thing I have heard in my life," Matt says crossing his arms. "Well, as far as I know, five-year-olds can't drink vodka, so who's the five-year-old now huh?" Nick defends his idea. "We all are a bit tipsy so the chances of you winning are fair, you're just a pussy," Nick says trying to provoke Matt. "Yeah Matt, don't be a pussy," Chris joins in. "Okay, that's it, we're playing, and I'm going to win," Matt says and smiles confidently. Nick claps his hands excitedly as he stands up and walks to the pile of board games that are stacked on a shelf above the TV.
"Found it! Y'all are going down, I hope y'all like the taste of losing, because y'all are gonna be licking the L's shortly," Nick says with a devious smile. "Okay, this one's clearly had more than enough to drink," Matt says as he facepalms.
Nick sets up the game, laying the playing pad down on the floor and placing the spinner next to the mat. "So, who wants to go first?" Nick says grinning. "I'll go," Chris answers and bends down to spin the indicator. "Right foot on red." He says out loud and steps on the playing mat. We all take our turns and the game is starting to get intense.
"Nick you are going to lose," Matt says his voice getting higher at the end of the sentence. The poses we are in are criminal. We are four, grown adults standing on this little mat, meant for children. At this point in the game, the slightest movement could make us all fall down. "Chris, you look like a deformed frog," I say as I'm laughing, almost snorting. Chris's right foot is still on red, his left foot is on blue, his right hand on blue, in front of his left leg, and his left hand is in front of his right leg. Nick is chilling in a comfortable position, meanwhile, I'm stretched out, so close to fall.
We all spin a few times. When all of a sudden Chris loses his balance and falls. "Hah, it wasn't even your turn, you're out, take a shot," Nick yells, happy that he's still in the game. "This is so annoying, 100 bucks on Nick falling next," Chris says as he takes a shot of vodka. I'm now in a compromising position, both of my hands are on red and my feet are on green and yellow, my position is leaving my ass high up in the air. Nick is now barely staying in the game.
"Nick it's your turn," Chris says out loudly, the alcohol he's had, making him unaware of the volume he's speaking in. Nick spins the spinner, "right hand green," Chris says. As Nick tried to move his hand, he lost his balance and fell. "Fuck," he yells out as he stands up. "Where my money at?" Chris says as he hands Nick a shot of vodka.
"Spin it," I say to Matt, and he does. "Left hand red," I say and Matt starts to move his left hand. Now both of his hands need to be on red and the only place in order for him not to fall is on either side of my hands. As he moves over me he brushes against my ass making me lose my balance slightly. Placing his hand next to mine, his head is now next to mine, "sorry," he says quietly, his hot breath brushing against my skin, sending shivers down my spine.
It's now my turn and if I don't think of something quickly, I'm going to lose. I look over my shoulder to see what Chris and Nick are doing, they are currently in the kitchen getting some drinks. My lips move making a small grin, this is perfect.
As I reach for the spinner, I pop up my ass, making it brush against Matt's crotch. "Right hand red, looks like I'm safe for now," I say as I turn to Matt, a smirk appearing on my lips.
After taking my turn, I move back, again brushing against his crotch, now feeling something hard. "Don't do that," Matt says in an almost moaning tone. "Do what?" I say looking at him. "Don't try to act all innocent," he says in a serious tone. "It's your turn," I say, a smile plastered on my face.
Matt takes his turn and spins the spinner, "left foot green," He says, looking at the spinner. As he tries to move, I once again pop up my ass, making him brush against it once again, the tension on his crotch getting too much for him, making him lose his balance and he falls. "Ha, I win," I say as I stand up clapping my hands together. Nick and Chris rush over to the living room.
"Did Matt lose?" Nick asks. "Yeah because she cheated," he says, anger and frustration can be heard in his voice. "What did I do, that counts as cheating?" I ask, raising one eyebrow, as a smirk creeps on my lips again, knowing he can't say anything without explaining him further. "Nothing," Matt murmurs. "What's that? I couldn't hear you," I tease him. "I said, nothing," Matt raises his voice, standing up and storming off to his room.
"I am too drunk for this," Chris says throwing up his hands as he turns around and heads to his room. "Can you help me clean this up?" I ask Nick, and he nods kneeling down.
We cleaned everything up and put the game back in its place. "You ready to head to bed?" Nick asks. "You go, I'm going to come later, I'm going to check on Matt," I say as I start walking to Matt's room. "Goodnight Nick," I say smiling. "Goodnight." He answers.
Without knocking I open the door to Matt's room. "Hey, you okay?" I ask as I look at him. He's sitting on the edge of his bed looking straight at me. "I was waiting for you to come in, want to play a game?" Matt says. "Sure, what game?" I ask unsure what game he had planned.
"Since we're playing games, let's play a game you can't cheat in," he says a smirk creeping on his lips. "Simon says, close the door," Matt says. Oh shit, we're already playing. I close the door not moving an inch. "Simon says turn around and lock the door," his voice getting deeper. I do as he says. "Simon says turn back around and stand in front of me," he says. As I turn around, about to walk in front of Matt, my eyes meet his, his eyes grow dark and his lips form a slight grin.
"Simon says strip," he says his tone getting even deeper, a hint of lust accompanying his voice. "What?" I ask, my voice slightly trembling. "You heard me, Simon says strip," he repeats. I start off by taking off my baby tee throwing it on the ground leaving my upper body fully naked. I slip out of my shorts, letting them fall to my ankles before stepping out of them. I pick up my head to look at Matt, he stares me up and down licking his lips.
He stands up and walks closer to me, his hands move my hair to one side of my shoulder, then proceeds to leave a wet kiss on the back of my neck, sending shivers down my spine. His hand reaches over my body, touching my neck as he stands behind me "Left hand red." He says as slides his hand down my neck stopping at my breast. He massages my boob, pulling on my nipple making me moan.
"You like that?" He whispers in my ear. I don't answer. "Simon says answer," Matt says as his other hand slides down into my panties, pressing his finger against my clit before rubbing circles, making me moan. "Yes Matt I like that," I say as I throw back my head resting it on Matt's shoulder. He pulls out his hand, "Simon says turn around," Matt says and as soon as I do, he smashes his lips onto mine.
Matt wraps his hand around my waist taking small steps, leading us to his bed without breaking the kiss. I brush against his clothed cock, rubbing it slightly before I feel a slap on my hand making me break the kiss, I look up. "Nuh uh," Matt says shaking his finger, "Simon didn't say," he smirks and pulls his black t-shirt over his head throwing it to the ground next to my clothes.
He removes his belt, sliding it out of the belt loops of his oversized jean shorts, making them slide down a little, revealing the band of his boxers. He looks at me before moving his gaze to my hands.
"Simon says, extend your hands." His voice was demanding, I brought out my hands, and he grabbed them and put them together before wrapping and tying them together with his belt.
Matt puts his hand on my hips pushing them back, guiding me backward. As I take steps backward, I eventually fall on his bed. He crawls on top of me, spreading my legs with his knee, making space for himself.
He yanks up my hands by the tied belt, pinning them above my head, immediately, Matt attacks my neck with his lips, leaving a trail of kisses from my neck to my breasts, he kisses softly, slipping in a few bites. His hand slides up my thigh, stopping at my heat, his thumb starts to draw circles on my clit.
"Matt," I moan out. "Shhh, we don't want Nick or Chris hearing us do we?" He says looking up at me, taking his lips off of my breast. I shake my head in response and he smirks, "good girl," he says as he continues to rub circles on my clit his lips now moving back from my breast to my collarbone to my jaw before meeting my lips.
"Matt," I moan out as I try to pull my hands out of his grip. "Matt what?" He says as his hands push harder on mine, making sure I can't move. "Please, I need you," I whimper. He lets go of my hands and pulls away from my clit, making me let out a whimper from the loss of contact.
I immediately bring my hands down to my clit and start rubbing circles on my clit, pleasuring myself. As he unbuttons his jeans, he notices my hands, he grabs and pins them above my head again. "Are you gonna make me punish you?" He says his voice filthy and dark. "No," I say, shaking my head and looking at him. "Yeah, be a good girl for me," Matt says practically growling.
I move up and down my hips trying to get some relief as I watch him undo his jean shorts pulling them down, his boxers with them making his cock spring out, hitting his lower abdomen, precum glistening on his tip. Matt looks at me, "see what your little strategy to win did to me," he says raising his eyebrow.
"Please Matt, I can't take it anymore," I say as I scoot closer. Matt moves on top of me pinning my hands again, his other hand sliding my panties to the side before aligning himself with my heat. He pushes his cock in slowly before pulling it out almost completely, then pushing back in hard. "Oh- my- god- Matt-" I moan out between thrusts, his hand moving over my mouth to muffle my moans.
Matt fastens his thrusts, with each thrust going in deeper, making me moan out loud, he leans into my ear. "That's it, sweetheart, take my cock so good," Matt growls, pushing in me deeper than ever, his tip hitting my g-spot with every thrust. "Mmmm Matt you feel so good, I'm close," I moan out feeling my climax creeping up tension building in my stomach.
Matt moves his elbow next to my head, positioning himself so he's able to thrust even deeper. I arch my back as the pleasure takes over my body. His quiet moans landed in my ear, his hot breath sending me over the edge.
"Matt, I'm about to cum," I moan out. He smashes his lips onto mine in order to contain my moans as he plants a few more thrusts before I feel my walls tighten around his length, feeling the knot in my stomach releasing, my climax coming over me, I moan into the kiss. His hips continue to move as he thrusts in me a few more times before planting his cum inside me groaning, breaking the kiss.
He pulls out falling next to me, turning his head to look at me. "Who won?" He says smirking. "I did," I answer smiling, knowing this will piss him off. "Can you untie me?" I say as I shake my hands. "You didn't say Simon says," Matt answers teasing me back. "Simon says round two," I say as a devilish smirk appears on my lips.
I guess I won't be heading to Nick's room tonight.
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slayfics · 8 months ago
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Katsuki lends you a shirt.
Warnings: aged up | NSFW themes
1,000 words~
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"You keeping up with me brat?" Katsuki asked, turning the page of his textbook.
You both were studying for the next coming exam in his dorm. Like always- Katsuki had almost all the material memorized, and you were struggling to grasp everything.
"Hold on- let me re-read that last question," You complained, reaching for your mug full of tea while scanning the page again. Multitasking resulted in the mug slipping from your fingers and the warm tea splashing out. Luckily the contents only dampened your uniform and not his bed. You'd never hear the end of it if it did.
"Damn it-" you exclaimed.
"Do you have to be so damn clumsy?" Katsuki ridiculed.
You rolled your eyes at his remarks. "At least none spilled on your bed," you spoke and dabbed at your soaked shirt with a napkin from your bag. Your dabs did little to soak up the large spill of tea. "Whatever it's fine- can you just explain this last question to me," You asked, throwing the napkin back in your bag and admitting defeat with your wet shirt.
"You're really helpless, hu?" he mocked and looked up from his book but immediately became halted by the sight of you. Katsuki's eyes snapped quickly back to his book, and he cleared his throat.
"Yeah yeah- make fun of me all you want can you just explain it already?!" You pressed.
"I'm fucking trying-" He grunted peering up at you again before looking back at his book. The spill from the tea had made your once-white uniformed shirt completely see-through. The sight was proving to be a distraction for him.
Missing the blush that tinted his cheeks and reddened his nose you taunted him, "Or do you actually not understand it either, hm?" You teased.
"Tch- hold on," Katsuki said, keeping his gaze from you as he got off the bed. He shuffled to his closet and threw a shirt at you. "Change into that- can't focus with you looking like you came back from damn wet t-shirt contest," he explained.
Slightly confused, you looked down and realized that with the spill set in your bra was completely visible through your shirt. You let out an amused laugh and unbuttoned your shirt to change into his.
"THE HELL?!" Katsuki exclaimed and quickly turned around.
"What?" you asked teasingly. "Isn't this what you wanted?"
"Change in the damn restroom," He barked.
"Oh relax- my hero costume is much more revealing than this," you replied.
Katsuki just let out an annoyed grunt.
"Didn't expect you to be so flustered by tits," You laughed. Even though he had turned around you caught his reflection in the mirror- his eyes slightly peered at you stretching to grab the shirt he threw at you.
You smirked at him in the mirror, and his eyes shot forward when you did- the small blush on his cheeks deepened at being caught.
"I don't mind you know- if I did, I would have gone to the restroom to change," You said.
"Just hurry up," he said roughly.
You eyed the back of him- his hands tightly bound into fists and the blush now evident on the tips of his ears. It was fun to see Katsuki so flustered. It was such a change from his usual attitude. As if finally, something had power over the stubborn boy. The feeling gave rise to devious thoughts that you couldn't say no to.
"Have you not seen boobs before?" You asked, tilting your head to the side.
"HAH?! Course I have!" He yelled.
"I mean in person- up close," you clarified.
Your question seemed to stun Katsuki- for the first time, he was speechless. He wanted to tell you to shut the hell up and change already so you could get back to studying but- his mind was racing with why you were asking him such a stupid question. Until you asked another-
"Do you want to?" You asked almost in a whisper.
What kind of question was that? Of course, he wanted to- but... he wasn't some damn perv like Mineta or Kaminari.
"Tch- you think I'm some fucking perv like those other extras. Just change so we can get back to studying," he finally answered.
"No- I offered that makes it ok- and that blush on your face says otherwise. You think I can't see that?" You teased.
Katsuki grunted and turned around to face you, "You're not going to fucking give this up, are you?" He said, pretending it was your stubbornness that was making him give in and not his own desires.
You smiled at his flustered expression, "I will- if you tell me honestly you don't want to." You said winking at him.
Katsuki gritted his teeth and his nose scrunched up.
"That's what I thought- you can't can you?" You giggled.
"You're so damn provocative," He complained but sat next to you on the bed.
"This has been bugging me all day anyway- been dying to get it off," you said unsnapping the back of your bra and exposing your breasts.
Katsuki's eyes widened at you- shocked that your offer was not just a tease. The blush on his face ignited once more and so did his scowl as his eyes gazed at your exposed skin. He looked equally frustrated and flustered as if he was angry at his own desires. Katsuki hated feeling vulnerable- and you knew just the ways to get the best of him.
"You can squeeze them if you want," You offered further.
Katsuki only peered at you for a moment to ensure your offer was legitimate consent before quickly squeezing one of your breasts in his hand. As he did, he turned his face away from you- hiding his lack of composure. You were soft, and warm, and all his boy hormones screamed at him to stuff his face in your chest. He was sure if he turned to look at the sight of your breast in his hand, he wouldn't be able to control himself, and he didn't want to give you that satisfaction of having power over him.
As rough as he was everywhere else in his life you were surprised at the gentleness he used to squeeze you.
Katsuki dropped his hand but remained looking away from you and he tried to regain himself.
You took mercy on him and threw his shirt over your head finally.
"This is a comfy shirt," you said, trying to change the subject and ease the embarrassment oozing off Katsuki.
"Keep it as long as you want," he grunted and cleared his throat making a grab for his textbook again. "Alright... what question did you need help with again brat?" he asked- attempting to move on and switch back to his usual rough demeanor.
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Tags: @unofficialmuilover @maddietries @fiannee @i-heart-carlisle @derangedmango @matchat3a @zanarkandskylines
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sleepymarimo · 7 months ago
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𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐚
synopsis: you catch him smiling.
pairing: zoro x fem!reader cw: none, just fluff! his little smile?? he's precious :') wc: ~600
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even zoro doesn't realize when his shoulders relax, when his features soften and the most minute of smiles curls at his lips.
another victory, another step forward toward everyone's dreams coming true.
despite the light atmosphere and celebrations, he likes having a good vantage point. if that means being a little separated from the group, then so be it.
the spot he's found, atop a small hill that's just close enough to keep an eye on things, is perfect.
his chin rests comfortably on his palm, while his free hand brings a half empty bottle of booze to his lips. between the night sky and salty sea air, the swordsman can ask for little else in this moment.
it's peaceful. the sound of drums and laughs, clinking bottles and shouts, the crashing waves and-
click.
his head is quick to snap toward the sound, those once relaxed features morphing into something more stern, maybe with a hint of annoyance. a rough hand reaches for the hilt of one of his blades, quicker than can be seen by the average person.
it fades into something just a little more gentle when he realizes it's you, his shoulders dropping. zoro's attention is caught by the camera between your hands.
"oi," he calls, a hint of warning in his tone, "a camera? really?"
setting his bottle down, he places his palms on the grass and rests his weight on them. his earrings chime together as he nods his head toward the spot next to him.
you've no reason to protest as you claim your seat, shoulder brushing against his. "i had one more photo left on it," you explain, your fondness of him clear as you continue, "so i thought i'd make it a good one."
your words are so sugary that he swears his stomach starts to ache. maybe they're just butterflies, on second thought.
"stop buttering me up, woman." he mumbles roughly, leaning over to check out the developing photo. "you already have me."
the image staring back at him makes his brows furrow, his cheeks warming in that way he detests.
zoro isn't used to seeing himself so unguarded and undeniably happy. the marimo has never been one to sweat the small stuff, always on the more carefree side of things.
in this photo, he just looks too… soft.
"burn it." he looks away, reaching for the bottle he'd yet to finish.
your laugh has his jaw tensing, then he throws a mock glare your way when you nudge your shoulder against his. "no way. why would i burn this?" you wave the photo in front of him.
he grits out your name, trying and failing to be intimidating. maybe it would've worked, if you hadn't been dating him for months.
"i don't look that that." he insists, glancing down at the picture. "don't let anyone else see it."
"i won't, i won't." you assure, admiring the photo with a smile. "it's just for me. promise."
zoro isn't entirely pleased that there's proof of him being a softy out there, but he trusts your word, trusts you.
you take note of this, leaning your head on his shoulder and offering him your best smile. "are you mad at me?"
the rise and fall of zoro's shoulder is indicative of the deep breath he takes, contemplating the question even though he knows the answer.
his head briefly tilts up toward the sky before he lowers it enough to bump his nose against your temple.
"no."
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coco-cinnamon · 17 days ago
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Better Than Me?
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౨ৎ Warnings: cursing, drinking, Y/N being a bit of a player (I've never wrote Y/N doing that so lmao), sexual themes, degrading, smut, Rafe being an ass but, when is he not lol 18+ MDNI.
౨ৎ Pairings: Rafe Cameron x Female Kook Reader.
౨ৎ Summary: When Y/N is at a party, she messes with Rafe, pretending like she's tired of him and going to go to Topper for her new sex buddy but, Rafe makes sure she learns her lesson.
౨ৎ Word Count: 900+ words.
౨ৎ Author's Note: this was originally supposed to be a re-write of one of my old Topper fics but, it turned into a Rafe fic lmao. I'll post the old Topper fic soon.
©coco-cinnamon 2024, please do not steal, copy, modify, repost, or translate my work.
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Sipping your beer from a red solo cup, you surveyed the lively party. The pulsing music reverberated in your chest, as Rafe Cameron's parties always went all out. When one of your friends caught your eye and waved you over to the dance floor, you smiled back, ready to join her. But before you could make your way through the crowd, a hand suddenly gripped your arm.
Attempting to pull your arm away, you snap, "What the fuck?!" But it's no use - their grip is like iron around your arm. You whip yourself around to see who had grabbed you. Looking up, you're met with ocean blue eyes staring down into yours, hazy with lust. "What the fuck do you want, Rafe?" you ask, finally managing to yank your arm out of his grip. He just smirks at you, his eyes a mix of amusement and lust. "That isn't any way to greet the host, is it?"
You crossed your arms, your gaze piercing up at him. "Again, what the hell do you want?" you asked.
He smirked. "Well, I figured since you came to my party, we could head up to my bedroom. I'm sure we could do way more interesting things up there than you would be able to do over there with your friends."
You cocked a brow, considering his words. He watched you, his impatience growing evident on his face. With a sarcastic smile, you said, "Thanks, but no thanks," and began to turn away. Before you could fully turn around and walk off, he yanked you back to face him again. Rolling your eyes, you groaned, "what now?"
"I thought we had something good going on here." he said, tilting his head quizzically. "We did, at first." you replied with a small shrug. His jaw clenched slightly as he growled, "What do you mean 'at first'?" Maintaining a calm demeanor and a small smirk, you replied, "Exactly what I said. At first, we had a pretty sweet thing, but then I got bored. Plain and simple." You crossed your arms as you continued, "You care more about your own pleasure than mine, so I'm no longer interested."
Rafe scoffed bitterly. "No longer interested? That's bullshit, Y/N, and you know it. You and I both know there's no one here who can make you feel as good as I do. No one knows your body like I do. Do you really think any of these idiots could make you cum the way I can?" He growled, tightening his grip on your shoulders.
You smirked up at him. "Maybe, maybe not. But it's worth a shot to see if anyone can do better. As of right now, I've got my eye on him." You gestured towards Topper Thornton, who was across the room drinking and chatting with Kelce. Rafe let out a mocking laugh, as if the very notion was absurd. "Really?! Topper Thornton is who you're interested in?" he scoffed. "That's got to be a joke, Y/N. You'd actually lower your standards that much?"
"I think I already lowered my standards when I started sleeping with you," you retorted with a smirk, knowing you were getting under his skin. You begin to speak once again, "I mean, Topper is very attractive. Or if you'd rather, I could go and sleep with Maybank. I know for a fact that he'd know how to—"
But you get cut off as Rafe's hand suddenly wraps around your throat. He yanks you forward, his nose only inches from yours. The height difference causes you to rise up on your tiptoes. "Cut it out Y/N or I swear to god I will take you up those fucking stairs right now and fuck your ass so hard that you won't be able to walk the next day." He said, his voice lethally soft. You look up at him, remaining defiant as a a smirk playing on your lips before you speak "I think I'd rather Topper over there to fuck me."
"You want Topper to fuck you?! Fine!" He snaps, his grip around your throat tightening slightly as he continues, "but just know that I will make you beg on your fucking hands and knees when you crawl back to me, begging me for my cock because Topper couldn't fuck you properly." With that, he roughly drops you. You glance over to where Topper stands with Kelce, then shift your gaze back to Rafe. He smirks down at you, tilting his head. "Well? What are you waiting for? I thought you wanted to whore yourself out to Topper." His grin widens as he sees your face twist with annoyance. "Or are you having second thoughts?"
You glared at him before turning around and starting to make your way towards Topper. But before you could reach him, Rafe came over and grabbed you, throwing you over his shoulder. He then smacked your ass roughly, eliciting a squeak from you.
"I- what the hell, Rafe?!" you yelled as he carried you towards the stairs. "Did you really think I was going to let you fuck him? You're mine, Y/N, and by the end of the night the only name that will be able to leave your lips is mine," he growled.
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౨ৎ Author's Note: tysm for reading, babes! part two coming soon!
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macfrog · 10 months ago
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sweet child o' mine | pt. iii
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now taking name suggestions for my joel's duck doodle. must rhyme with a curse word. most creative wins.
pairing: neighbor!joel x fem!reader
summary: as your pregnancy progresses, you and joel are getting closer. dangerously closer.
warnings: reader is literally pregnant so typical pregnancy symptoms & descriptions of stuff like extreme nausea and gagging (reader throws up off-page, no graphic description past sore throat/esophagus afterward), body changing, nerves around birth/becoming mom, another sonogram (gender reveal...?), baby kicks felt, labor pains shhh, age gap (late 20s reader, late 40s joel), joel is dating someone who isn't reader, our girl hates nye (she's valid), tommy uses colors to represent gender (he is Wrong), joel is for sure emotionally cheating at this point and reader knows it, joel kisses someone who is not his partner again, f masturbation, memories of the hot dirty sex they had whew, a SPRINKLING of breeding kink, praise kink, size kink, another parent dies (i love parents i promise ????), jealous!reader, protective!joel, alcohol consumption, cursing, a LOT of angst, lots of fluff, lil bit of smut, and duckie has the best comedic timing of any character in this entire series. :) DISCLAIMER: this series covers some issues which i know may be sensitive and possibly triggering to some. warnings will always be as thorough as possible, but if there’s ever anything you feel i’ve missed, please let me know. feel free to drop by my inbox anytime.
word count: 11.4k (sorry. lots to cover lots to do.)
pt. i / series masterlist | main masterlist | playlist | follow @macfroglets w notifs on to be the first to hear when i post 🩵
December.
The days are funneled by a quick pinch of dark, the breeze heavy in its sail. Houses lined with twinkling lights and windows pierced by pointed trees. Crooning from every radio station, teary-eyed movies on TV, and spiced apple everything.
You hate every fucking minute of it.
“Wait a second,” Tommy sits forward, leaning in, “you never do nothin’ for New Years?”
You shrug, lifting your eyebrows. “Nope. Just don’t like it much. That a crime?”
He considers it as he hands his empty tumbler up to Joel, his head lolling some. He’s on his…fourth drink of the night, right? Though, if you take into account his earlier argument – I’m eatin’ as I go. It don’t count. – it’s probably more like two. But it’s whiskey, so –
Never mind.
“Yeah,” Tommy finally decides, “kinda. The hell’s wrong with you, girl?”
“Tommy.”
Joel’s voice is a warning, edged by the sharp clink of three glasses pinched in his fingers.
His brother laughs amiably in response, though, nodding to your mock-offended expression. “At least you’re spendin’ it right this year. Last one before lil’ Dickie comes along, huh?”
Maria slaps his shoulder, rolling her eyes. “It’s Duckie,” she hisses, glancing over to you.
“Shoot,” he says, chuckling. “I knew that. My mistake.” And then, hand out towards you in an apology which makes your shoulders jerk with laughter, “I did know that, I swear.”
Tommy and Maria flew in a few days ago; the younger Miller adamant that he’d spend one last New Years with his big brother before he became a father. The night they arrived, they showed up on your doorstep – a hamper filled with diapers and muslins and baby socks hanging from Maria’s arm. They’ve asked to hang out with you every day since.
They’re good fun. Tommy likes you, at least, enough to tease you as much as you figure a brother might. He’s definitely the louder of the two – sometimes you swear you notice Joel cringing at him, something caught between a laugh and a frown on his face. And Maria’s sweet; she’s asked probably six times every hour since she first saw you if you’re feeling okay, if you’re tired, if you’re hungry.
Joel text you yesterday morning. Tommy and Maria wondering if you feel like coming over for NYE. No pressure, he added, I lie pretty good.
A smile snuck its way across your lips before you had the chance to tame it. Sure, you typed, I’ll bring the newspaper.
What Joel’s told them, about the wedding and the baby and everything since, you’ve no idea. You guys almost talked about it when he told you they were flying down after Christmas, but before you got the chance to ask him, Vanessa pulled up out front.
Not exactly a conversation you felt like having with the dude’s girlfriend hooked around his right arm.
She smiles at you, now, as you shuffle to the edge of the armchair you’re curled up in. Joel’s armchair – the plaid blanket cradling you, the leather soft and crinkled beneath. Your eyes quickly drop from hers when his hand reaches for your mug, your fingers crossing as you pass it up. “Let me come help,” you say, pushing from the chair.
He holds up a palm, shaking his head once. “Stay. I got it.”
“Thanks,” you murmur, settling back. Vanessa resumes smiling. You wish she’d fucking quit it. You wish you’d fucking quit focusing on her.
Joel knocks the mug gently against your shoulder with a small, almost sympathetic smile, and heads for the kitchen – leaving you sat between Tommy and Maria on one couch, and Vanessa on the other. You tuck your heels under your thighs, picking at a hangnail as you wait for the conversation to thaw.
Maria makes some comment about Austin in the winter: how different it is to Jackson, and the three of you nod and hum in agreement before the chatter fizzles to nothing again. You glance over to the clock, watching the hands chase one another to twelve.
This isn’t what you imagined a get-together with Joel’s family would feel like. Tight, tense. So tense that you can feel the weight on your chest, closing your lungs. Talking about the weather and the holiday traffic, talking about nothing to avoid talking about everything.
Tommy’s chin lifts, after a second too long of silence. “Hey, Joel!” he barks. “You ain’t shown me this nursery yet!”
Joel leans around the doorframe, half-distracted. “Barely even started it, little brother. Crib only got delivered yesterday.”
“Sheesh,” Maria’s eyes widen, “you sure are prepared.”
Vanessa laughs when Joel rolls his eyes and vanishes again. “You got no idea,” she says, “I have never seen him so…pedantic, right?” She looks to you, still smiling. So sweet, you worry your lips are pursing at the sight of it. Your neck tensing. Your eyes watering.
“Yeah,” you reply, nodding shyly and swallowing back the saccharine. “I think he’s more nervous than he’s letting on.”
Joel’s voice calls from the kitchen again: your name. When you answer, he says, “Why don’t you take Tommy up, show ‘im what we got so far?” and then, leaning back around the door, “She picked the color ‘n whatnot.”
“Ah,” Tommy says, palms pushing down on his knees, “so you’re the brains, then?”
You mirror him, accepting Joel’s request. As though you had any choice in the first place. Standing beside the younger Miller, you mutter, “Sure. Let’s go with that.”
He holds a hand out to usher you ahead, following you upstairs. Past the tousle-haired boy in grayscale, past the German shepherd, past the Christmas Day portrait. Wandering like you know the house inside out, like you might’ve picked the exact coordinates of each nail the picture frames hang on yourself.
Like the photographs pinned to the walls aren’t still as alien to you as they’d been that day you first set foot in here, the dress Joel would come to tear from your body slung over your arm.
You twist the gold handle and unveil a homely little room, painted by you and Joel just last week. The soft blue drying into his knuckles, random splatters on your palms and your jeans. The giggles drawn from your chest; the thief either the chemicals from the paint, or the man rolling it over the walls – and you’ve a pretty good idea of which.
Tommy sniffs roughly, nodding. Taps the toe of his boot against one of the two bulky boxes leant against the wall, a crib printed on one and a rocking chair on the other. His tipsy head bob bob bobbing. “Alright. ‘s nice, ain’t it?”
You settle against the window, the glass cold at your back. “Real nice, yeah. Be even better once it’s done.”
“What’s yours look like?”
“Mine?”
“Nursery at your place. Your one pink, ‘case it’s a girl?”
You snort. “Mine is a little greener. More…I guess it’s duck egg. Had some leftover paint.”
He clicks his fingers and points to you. “See what you did there. Duck egg. Duckie.”
“Hm. Wish I were that poetic. I just like the color.”
Tommy stuffs his hands in his pockets, wanders around the bare room. The faint lingering of whiskey putting up its best fight against the clean bite of fresh paint, the sweet scent shaking from him when he nods some more at the blank walls and naked windows. He clicks his teeth and asks, “How you holdin’ up, anyways?”
“How am I holding up?”
“Yep. With, uh…” he nods to the door, eyes wide, “…Vanessa,” he whispers. Louder than he must think – probably echoed, if anything, by the palm he curves around his mouth.
You cross your arms protectively, shoulders bunching. “She’s fine,” you say, voice deliberately low. You both ignore the crack in it when you add, “I like her. She’s – she’s taken this all like a champ.”
Tommy leans on the window ledge, a rugged hand you reckon you’d know was a Miller’s just by looking at it. Same rough-cut quality as Joel’s, like they’re torn from the same sheet of sandpaper. He props the other on his hip. “But, boy – it’s gotta be complicated, right?”
“I guess. But she’s real sweet about it. And Joel’s been great, too.” You sniff, the memory of your kiss flashing behind your eyes. The steady drum of Duck’s heartbeat, the gleam in Joel’s eye when he looked down at you. The guilt seeping from your skin like beads of sweat, prickling along your spine and fizzling against the cold windowpane.
Tommy blinks at you, liquor-glazed eyes scanning. His shoulders jerk, a loud huh propelling from his throat. When your head cocks in confusion, startled from your daydream, he spills. “He ‘n I had a mighty long talk when he told me.”
You feel yourself leaning in, magnetized to him – body hunched as though you’re gossiping in the corner of a house party. Inhaling secrets with the tinge of alcohol on Tommy’s breath. “Oh, yeah?”
Tommy hums. “Just wanted to make sure he’d thought it all through. Not you – I always knew he’d take care a’ you and Duck. But…involving Vanessa,” he lowers his voice again, glancing over to the warm light spilling in from the hallway, “I just wanted him to be sure.”
Your blood begins to warm, heat flooding through your body as you step closer, murmuring, “What’d he say?”
He flicks his head, seeming to toss his initial response to the wind. “You know Joel. He is his own man.”
Your face screws, head jerking back. “What’s that mean? He is his own man?”
A voice from the doorway interrupts. A shadow swimming in the golden light. “Who is?”
Tommy steps away from you, loosening his arms as his big brother drifts into the shadowy room. Dusting the conversation under the rug. The smell of whiskey backs off. “Speak of the devil. Nice paint job, Joel. Missed a couple spots, but – I’ll let you off.”
“Uhuh.” Joel’s eyes thin, his body slanted against the wall. Arms crossed, bottle of beer hanging from his fingers.
Tommy swaggers forward when Joel holds the bottle out, taking it with a wary glance at the tall figure. A dog meandering back to his owner, tail between his legs and ears flat. It takes his gritty voice to jolt you back to the room, splintering your gaze from Joel’s toned arms and huge chest. “Looks real good, you two. ‘s one lucky kid.”
Joel’s jaw lifts, his eyes landing on you. Dogs are terrible liars. “He talkin’ your ear off?”
You smile; recognizing the softer Joel you’ve grown used to over the last three months replacing the stern, cold version you once knew so well. “Only a little.”
“Tommy,” he says then, “Maria needs you for somethin’.”
The denim-donned Miller nods knowingly and heads out of the room, thud of his boots receding downstairs.
“Maria okay?” you ask, making space for Joel as he settles beside you.
He shrugs. “Only said that to get him outta your hair.”
You frown. “You sent me up here with him in the first place.”
“So I could come up ‘n check on you. Know this must be a lot – the two of them, tonight.”
“I’m fine. Promise. I’m a big girl.”
You both sigh, turning to look out at the dark street. Your arms cross, sitting somewhere above the tiny slope of your bump – a new development you’re still getting used to. Your stomach feels tighter, a little more solid than usual when you touch it. A little more…real. There’s someone in there, right? Like, actually there. They’re changing the way you look, the way you feel.
“This is it, right?” you say, staring at the white lanterns illuminating Alice Brown’s rose bushes. ��This is the year.”
“The year,” Joel agrees.
“Mhm. Become a mom. Become a dad.”
He purses his lips. “Yeah, I don’t know. I’ve had bigger years, kid.”
“Let’s hear it, old man. Let’s hear about your biggest year. God knows you’ve had plenty to choose from.”
He sucks a deep breath in, eyes tracing the silhouette of the houses across the street as he thinks. “Senior year, nineteen ninety-three. Asked Stacy Moore as my date to the prom ‘n she said yes. I was so nervous that I forgot my bow tie. Was a pretty good year.”
You hum, agreeing, and then, “I see your ninety-three, and I raise you: two thousand and one. There was this bike I wanted for-fucking-ever; it had, like, little beads on the spokes – would make this ratatatat sound whenever it moved. Tassels hanging from the handlebars, all iridescent. I begged my mom the entire year for it, and on Christmas morning I woke up, and…” You lift your hands, air puffing from between your lips. “Santa Claus delivered that year, dude.”
“Well,” Joel clicks his teeth, shell hardening only a little, “thanks for making me feel old as hell.”
“You’re welcome.” You beam back at him, breaking into a laugh when he does.
The two of you stand a little distance apart, denying yourselves the innocent brushing of shoulder against shoulder, the nudging of elbows and swaying of hips. Admiring the empty sky and emptier street, bathing between the cold moonlight of outside and the warm lamplight in.
And from somewhere deep in your belly, somewhere tucked behind your ribs, beneath your slow-growing womb: an urge to ask about her. To bring her up. To tend to the curiosity that Tommy poked a clumsy, drunken finger straight into, tearing it apart at the seams.
Like pressing on a new bruise, satiating the hungry need to know where you were hurt, how you were hurt, when you were hurt. A bent fingertip, pushing heavily into a sensitive splatter of dark purple; the burst blood vessels hissing in response, whispering, You don’t know, and you don’t want to know.
But you defy them. You do want to know. Want to satisfy the disturbed thrill you felt, leaning into Joel’s brother. Hands turning over one another, wet bottom lip trembling as he rounded the corner on some sort of…what was it, a secret? Some sort of truth, a long-buried revelation about the other woman. She’s a witch, have you spotted her crooked nose? She’s plotting something, I swear. She’s up to no good.
Your eyes lift again, focusing back on the dull color of the outside world. The bland canvas of reality. She’s not a witch, nor some genius mastermind. She’s a boring, relatively normal woman. Kind, thoughtful. Naïve and a little too eager to please; too willing to forgive a situation which warrants no such kindness or empathy.
She’s just…fine. Lukewarm. And you’ve no idea why that pisses you off so much.
Which, incidentally, makes the bruise sting all the more.
“Maria, Maria,” Tommy’s voice claws its way upstairs, “turn it on, turn it – Joel? Joel! It’s midnight, Joel, you two better come on down, now! Have we missed it –? Have we –?”
The sound of cheering slowly bubbles to life behind his drawl as the TV volume picks up, the tittering of Maria and Vanessa chiming in.
“…five, four, three, two, one…Happy New Year!”
Joel’s looking over his shoulder, waiting for footsteps or voices or a girlfriend who never shows. And he ignores his brother, for he is his own man, and turns to you instead. Bracing himself on the ledge, he blinks down with a plain grin on his lips. “Happy New Year, Mom,” he whispers.
You return his smile, taking his hand when he reaches out to you. “Happy New Year, Dad,” you reply, squeezing his palm.
He pulls you in for a hug, kissing your cheek briskly as you hook your arms over his shoulders. His beard scratches your cheek, grazes the curve of your shoulder, and you don’t mind. Your small, swollen belly presses against his; the tiny curve safe in the midst of your embrace.
Outside, the sky crackles to life with the distant spatter of fireworks, color shattering across the black canvas – red, blue, green and gold, dissolving as quickly as they explode into the now-January night. A burst of purple light washes between the two of you, and you turn your head on Joel’s shoulder to watch as the sparks rain over your neighbors’ roofs.
“I should get goin’,” you whisper, feeling his heartbeat a little too strongly against your own. Becoming suddenly aware of the weight of your frames locked together.
“Glad you came,” he says as he leans away. “I know this ain’t…I know we’re all tryin’, but you’re tryin’ the most, and I appreciate it. I hope you know that.”
“I know it,” you tell him, rolling your eyes. “Now, go. Go kiss your girlfriend.”
He chuckles, making for the door. “You want me to walk you home?”
Your eyes close serenely, the image of him doused in flickers of gold burning behind your eyelids. “I’ll survive the walk across the hedgerow, Miller.”
Joel nods once and leaves, plodding downstairs to be greeted by his open-armed girlfriend, a peck between them, arms crossed behind his neck. The lyrics of Auld Lang Syne slurred against his lips.
And you think – You know what? If it’ll rip you apart from her, if it’ll keep her bright red lips and her shining curtain of hair away from you, if it’ll stop her sucking in your air and your smell and your attention for thirty fucking seconds –
Then, yeah. Walk me home. Stay for a drink. Sleep in the goddamn guestroom.
Walk me home.
You slip out of the front door when the two couples are in the kitchen, missing Joel’s calling your name – or perhaps just ignoring it altogether.
“Spread the love at St. David’s this Valentine’s Day…”
Joel slows alongside a wall of cerise hearts, each one fluttering like wings whenever the hospital doors slide open and the breeze sneaks inside. Slips scrawled with names and messages: Love you M! and J + A, crude drawings of stick figures holding hands. Your lips curl into a smirk, watching him flick through each one as you palm your round stomach.
You just saw Duck for the second time. The last time, Freya was kind enough to mention, before they’re tearing you in two. Sorry, she mouthed when your expression dropped, and went back to twisting the probe over your stomach. Silently.
You’re getting better at it, you think. Playing Mom. Like some little game of make-believe, which is only real for as long as you’re looking it square in the eye – attending doctor’s appointments, updating the neighbors on your newest list of symptoms en route to your mailbox.
A little surer on your feet, now that you’ve found a balance to it: taking it as seriously as it warrants, a dry little pill stuck on the cliff of your throat, and making it easier to swallow with humor like water, a huge gulp anytime the fear claws its way up your spine.
And no more panic, since at least before Christmas. Only a little flustered this afternoon when Freya asked if you wanted to know the sex.
It felt too big a thing to hear, too real. You’re only just getting used to the backache and the bleeding gums. (And why didn’t you know that your gums would bleed? Isn’t that something they should fucking warn you about? Congrats, you’re pregnant: prepare for blood seeping from your jaw.)
No. No, thanks. Your head shot around to Joel. No, right?
He shrugged. Makes no difference to me.
Are you sure?
I’m sure, kid. Promise.
‘cause we can find out. I mean – if you want to.
He rocked forward on the balls of his feet, tapping you amiably on the shoulder. I don’t. You’re good.
You don’t?
No, I – He sighed, a hand dragging through his hair. If you want to, I want to. If you don’t, I don’t. Alright?
Freya bit back a laugh, the closed fist over her lips doing little to hide it. You guys should write a book on co-parenting.
But then she left the room again, closed the door on that same old little bubble – the three of you perched on the bed, you and Joel blinking up at the grains of your child onscreen – and you cried. Again. More.
Everything clearer, everything even more human than before: the globe of their skull, the tiny slope of their nose. All glowing in the dark waves of your womb, twinkling like the most beautiful constellation you could ever come across. Their ankles were crossed, feet forming a tiny heart shape in the top corner of the sonogram. Your hand lifted to point it out to Joel, and before the words found voice, you choked and broke down again.
He held you, lips to your hair, body solid as a rock as you melted into him in waves of salty tears. Smiled that honey-glazed smile and said he was so proud of you, said, look what your body’s doin’, darlin’, look what you’re growin’ – which only made you weep more.
And you pretended not to wait for it – for the moment when you might tilt your head up and your lips might line with his, and he might close the achy space between you again, might shush your cries by stealing the air from your lungs and the beat from your heart.
But he didn’t.
Which is fine.
Right?
“Somethin’ on your mind, kid?” he asks now, eyes still glued to the sea of hearts.
Your stare snaps from him instantly, unaware it was even held there. You tug on the hem of your sweater and pull the sleeves over your hands, mumbling, “Fine, I’m – I’m just…Come on, man. I’m hungry. I didn’t eat lunch today.”
“’n whose fault is that?”
You glower at him. “How considerate,” you seethe, “Vanessa’s a fucking lucky woman, you know that?”
He ignores you, a dumb smile on his face. The usual. “Let’s leave one for ‘em.”
A hot temper begins to boil below the surface of your skin, squeezing between your teeth in a fist-swinging breath. Also the usual these days, apparently. “For who?”
“Duckie. Somethin’ to mark the second scan. Last time we see them, before –”
Your hand flies up, eyes closing with a wince. Shut the fuck up. “Enough. I know.”
Joel hms, still smiling to himself. His beard has grown out a little: thicker, darker, gray sewn through like little whip stitches lining his jaw. He fishes a heart shape from the tub along with a pen, which he twirls annoyingly around his fingers as he thinks.
You sink back against the clinical white wall, an offensively bright color, holding your cheeks up in something of a smile when a nurse wanders past, nodding to both of you. Your face drops back to a scowl as soon as she’s over Joel’s shoulder, and your eyes meet his again – his brows raised, expectant.
“What?” you ask, chewing on the inside of your cheek.
He holds the slip up. “What we gonna write?”
And whatever charm the moment may have held, withers instantly. You throw your arms up petulantly. “You wanted to do it! Pick something. See you soon, or something, I don’t fucking know.”
“I don’t fucking know,” Joel muses, creases by his eyes when he smirks. “Poignant.”
“That’s what you should write,” you step closer, shoving your shoulder into his as you study the trembling hearts on the board, “if you can spell poignant, write that.”
“Hilarious,” he mutters, bending to scribble onto the shape, shielding his work from your view when you hang around his shoulder to pry. Cupping over the message until he’s straightening up, tossing the pen back to the desk, stealing a pin from the tub.
“Let me read,” you protest, tugging on his flannel sleeve.
“I will,” he says, shaking you off. “Patience, darlin’.”
Joel turns to the wall and pins the heart higher than the rest, in a spot clear of its own on the corkboard – thick arms stretching higher higher higher and pulling your gaze with them. As he steps back, he takes you gently by the waist and positions you in front of his body, your shoulders brushing against his chest. Your ribs hold your heart back from hammering into his.
You push up onto your tiptoes and squint at the note, which quivers when the hospital doors pull open again. “Mom and…Mom and Dad f…You fucking…”
Joel dodges your batting arm, snickering with you as he turns to make for the exit. “You don’t like it?” he tosses over his shoulder.
The heart stares down at you, black ink carved into the paper, watching as you turn and hurry after him, giggling. “Mom and Dad fuckin love you? So much for my potty mouth. And the –” another wheezing laugh you’d otherwise be ashamed to let him hear, “– the drawing? It looks – it looks more like a giraffe than a duck. Or, like, you know those long-necked dinosaurs?”
Joel’s head tips back, his own laughter caught up by the breeze when you wander outside, slipping your wrist around the crook of his elbow. Something infectious about it, something which stirs your own laughter until you’re walking arm in arm to the truck with a man who, six months ago, you’d barely look at twice over the fence.
The blind rage bubbling from your empty stomach seems to dissipate, dwindled to nothing in the face of that same man – his swollen cheeks and crows-feet eyes. And you say, “You’re disgustingly sentimental, you know that? Like, sickening.”
And Joel smirks, the way he always fucking does, and says, “You love it. Can’t lie to me.”
“I love it,” you concede, nudging into him as he opens the door for you.
The drive home is quiet, but not uncomfortable. There’s another thing you’re getting good at: being around Joel without need for snide remarks, without feeling your tongue curl under the weight of some snappy quip, loaded and aimed. Being around him and talking about Duck, asking how Tommy and Maria are. Forcing your teeth and tongue to carve out words which ask how Vanessa is, what she’s up to, when he’s seeing her next.
None of this is ideal, that’s for sure. Joel’s girlfriend aside, you’ve spent the last five months cohabiting your body with a stranger who lives most peacefully in the eye of a raging tornado of hormones – flitting between fits of giggles and pulsating joy in your veins, to waves of tears and an anger so hot beneath your skin that you wonder if your emotions might dry up completely by the time this is all through.
It's tough. It’s scary. And some nights you lie in bed, alone, wet eyes fixed on nothing, waiting for someone to burst into the room and announce that it’s all a prank. Just a silly joke. You and Joel can go back to tossing newspapers and casting glowers.
But for now, sat in the passenger seat of his truck – the seatbelt warped around the curve of your belly, the Eagles lilting softly from the radio – it feels like you’re making a home out of that tornado, too. Feeling the swirling walls of wind toss your hair like the breeze through the truck window; the chilled caress of the evening around your outstretched arm, soaring down the highway.
Yeah, you think. I can make something outta this.
“You know what I’m craving?”
Joel’s watching the light, waiting for green. “What’s that?”
“A fucking bagel. Cream cheese, pastrami,” you groan.
He snorts, cringing when he adds, “Pickles?”
A moan tears from the base of your throat, head lolling against your seat. “I could orgasm just thinking about it.”
The light turns, and Joel swings right. “I’d rather you didn’t,” he mutters, turning the wheel with one palm. “I got bagels back at the house, if you want one.”
You stare at him, jaw loose, saliva pooling behind your bottom lip. “Are you fucking kidding me?”
He smiles, shaking his head. “Let me make you one, ‘fore you go home. Big day, ‘n all.”
And you hate it – hate the way your cheeks fill with a genuine happiness, something swollen and achy, impossible to ignore when it lifts your eyes and hurts your teeth. Appreciation, or admiration, perhaps, that you figure you’ll only ever have for him. You don’t know what the fuck to call it.
So you sum it up into three words. “That’d be nice,” you whisper, and Joel places his hand over your knee, shaking it lightly as he drives on.
It stays there, until he’s pulling into his driveway.
He pushes the front door open and steps back, an arm extended to let you by first. An after you, ma’am, between his lips. And you turn to make some mocking joke, the beginnings of some comment about how gentlemanly he is, when you’re socked square on the nose by a heavy-fisted, bitter scent.
“Oh, fuck,” you gasp, stumbling backwards across the threshold and onto the porch again. Your throat constricting around nothing, your tongue twisting, your stomach lurching.
Joel catches you just in time to stop you from falling on your ass. “The hell’s the m–? Oh.”
“Hi!” Vanessa calls from the kitchen, leaning around the doorframe to wave you both in. “Almost ready! Take a seat.”
“V–? Hey, sweetheart?” Joel calls back, one hand around your wrist and the other between your shoulders. “What – what’s cookin’?”
She pauses, glancing back at the stove. Pulls the dish towel between her hands taut. “I…I made pasta.”
“Yeah, what kind, sweet?”
“…Bolognese.”
He can’t cover his own sigh quick enough. Thick with something which feels like anger. “Shit,” he turns back to you, “I am so sorry.”
You pull in a deep, unsteady breath, your lungs struggling to separate night air from tomato juice. A weight rolling at the bottom of your stomach, your entire body beginning to tremble with it. “I feel like I’m gonna – Joel, I’m gonna –”
“Breathe,” he whispers, voice urgent, palm slipping to cup your jaw. “Just breathe for me.”
But your throat’s tightening, swallowing hard around gags which come stronger and quicker the more you try to fight them down. “I can still fucking smell it –”
Her shadow blocks the stretch of light from the house. A nervous little thing, a timid creature’s shadow stretched wide across the porch floor. “Is…everything okay?”
“It’s – it’s fine,” Joel sighs again, torn between comforting you and letting Vanessa down gently, “it’s just – tomato is one of her…her aversions.” He’s unable to pull his eyes from you, privately asking, “Are you okay?” when Vanessa turns back to the kitchen.
“I didn’t – I didn’t know,” she mumbles, thumbnail between her teeth. “I am so sorry.”
Suddenly, your will not to throw up is overpowered by your will to tell her, “It’s fine,” sucking in a deep, sickly breath before adding, “I’m just gonna – I should go.”
“I don’t want you to go,” Joel says, his teeth guarding the words from his girlfriend.
“I’m gonna clean up in here,” Vanessa points over her shoulder, and you think she must’ve heard him, “get outta your hair. I’m so sorry, again. I would’ve never…”
Joel lets go of you as you stagger backwards, the cold air tearing down your throat to meet the burning acid tickling up your esophagus. “Please don’t apologize,” you lift a weak hand, “how could you have known? I’ll –” another sharp gasp, “– I’ll see you guys around.”
He must say your name, must try once more to pull you back to his side, but the blood’s rushing through your ears, and your heart’s pounding at the back of your tongue, and your stomach’s notching its way up your spine. You make it to your kitchen sink just in time.
He keeps you waiting all of one hour before he’s calling you. Your arm reaches over to your nightstand, fumbling in the dark for your heavy phone, the screen cold against your cheek.
“Mhm?”
“Are you okay?”
Your lungs pull a deep, slow breath. The acid painted across your throat tickles as the air passes by it, an uncomfortable, scratchy feeling.“Mhm.”
“That a lie?”
“Only a little. Is Vanessa okay?”
He takes a second to answer. Lets go of whatever he was going to say with a sigh, replacing it with, “She just left.”
“Is she mad at us?”
Another second. “Just me. Not you.”
You massage the slope below your breasts, the ache in your esophagus throbbing when you move. “Why just you?”
Ruffling, like he’s settling back into his couch. Sinking into the cushion, his body as heavy as yours feels on your mattress. “I should’ve told her you didn’t like tomatoes. ‘cause now I’m a goddamn mind reader. I mean, why the hell wouldn’t my girlfriend be in my house cookin’ a damn pasta dish while I’m out, y’know? Jesus Christ.”
“Joel,” you turn slowly onto your back, bravely waiting for the waves of nausea still lapping around your stomach to turn with you, “it was a nice thing, what she did. She didn’t mean to…She probably thought she was helping.”
“Naw, I know,” he replies, the sharp bite of his words softening again, shrinking under yours. “I don’t care about her and her helping, though, darlin’, I care about y –” He barely catches it in time. “I care about you carrying my child, and I care about making sure you don’t spend your nights fuckin’…throwing up tomato sauce.”
You gulp, neck convulsing. The backwash of bile swallowed back. Your chest floods with a heat of quick panic. “Can we…maybe…not use the word? I just –”
“Sorry, baby. Sorry. This is just – it’s a lot easier if she would just…”
Your eyes close over, a salty sting sweeping behind them. If she would just lay off. Back off. Fuck off. “…but she won’t, Joel. She loves you. ‘n you…”
The words drift off, taken by the tide, swept off into silence. And neither of you bother with trying to retrieve them – you just watch, stood safe on the shoreline, as they fold under the waves of something too big for either of you to acknowledge. Too dark, too dangerous.
So, you say, “I get it,” instead; say, “I get why you’re mad. Just – let’s forget about it, okay? Sorry for…ruining dinner.”
Joel scoffs, that old, pissed-off Joel scoff. You can see his deadened expression on the back of your eyelids. You may as well have just thrown his newspaper to the end of the earth. “You know damn well that you didn’t ruin anything. How you feelin’?”
“Tired. Throat kinda hurts.”
“Still feel like that pastrami bagel?”
“Not really. Sorry. Appetite’s gone.”
“How about a water?”
“I got some here. Thanks.”
“Okay,” Joel sniffs, “how about: you take the hint and let me come over there to see you?”
You giggle, hand over your eyes to mask your expression from the dark. “I hate you. Yeah, come over. Door’s unlocked.”
Date night – six month anniversary or whatever. Call me if you need anything.
And I mean anything. OK?
Your thumbs hover over the two gray messages, an awkward jig as your brain scrambles to offer words back. Where are you guys going? Too interested. Too weird. OK, what if I’m bored? Delete delete delete. Trying too hard. Sure, have a good n–
The ellipsis pops up and you freeze. A stupidly polite swish delivers Joel’s third text.
Boredom counts as anything, by the way.
And the fucker steals another smile from you. You notice it when you look up, clocking yourself in the mirror. Accompanied by a warmth which drips down your spine, swirls around your tummy; a fluttering you’re not sure is Duckie or something else.
Have a good night, Dad, you type back, tossing the phone to the end of your bed when you hit send. Swiping for a pillow, holding it firm to your face. Pressing so deep into the plush that even the linen won’t be able to see your grin.
Joel told you about this six-month anniversary last week. He wasn’t too thrilled about it then, either. Dinner to celebrate six months? A year, fair enough. But six months?
You swallowed your pride, swallowed the same throttling ecstasy which seeped through your pores on New Year’s Eve, on that February evening she cooked– never mind; a desperate desire to tear apart the very notion of Vanessa and her cutesy little date nights and candlelit dinners. I think it’s a fun idea, you said. Y’all should do it.
And Joel listened. Because he always fucking listens to you, these days. Listens when you tell him that you like the watermelon Sour Patch Kids best, and picks them up anytime he’s at the store. Listens to you when you tell him he should move the crib away from the window, in case the streetlights shine on Duck while they sleep.
Listens when you ramble about how sore your feet are, how heavy your belly feels, how there’s a clammy heat lingering under your skin at all times, bubbling and bubbling and never rising to anything more than steam collecting on the underside of your flesh.
Listens when you tell him to go spend time with his girlfriend. And neither of you pay attention to the jealous shadow behind your words, the hesitant quiver behind his.
He replies almost instantly, the ping like a gunshot at the beginning of a race. Pillow slammed into the mattress, body lunging forward.
You too, Mom. Don’t have too much fun without me.
You lock the phone and slide it back under your covers, smiling dumbly.
There’s still a small part of you waiting for the big reveal: none of this is really happening. A dream, maybe, something you’ll wake from with a tiny throbbing headache, a dry mouth and a new reason to avoid your neighbor at all costs.
But it seems that, each time that thought crosses your mind, you’re quicker and quicker to quash it. Realizing each time that what lies ahead – Joel, your baby, this future version of yourself that you’re yet to meet, still just a little out of reach – fills you with more excitement and wonder, than it does fear.
Mom.
It’s not something you ever imagined for yourself. Not someone you ever thought you’d be. And yet, each time you say it out loud, each time you look in the mirror and picture a baby in the crook of your arm, a toddler perched on your hip, a kid stood by your side, tugging on the hem of your shirt – she feels a little closer. A little clearer. She just has to look over her shoulder, notice you waiting. I’m right here, she says. Come find me.
Mom. Mom and Dad.
You imagine Joel right now, sat in some ritzy restaurant with jazz music and stained-glass lamps on every table, ordering Vanessa some glorified lentil soup and slapping his card over the bill before the waiter has a chance to reveal the damage to him. Your lips twist at the thought – her jewels and her long hair and her sweet little smile laced with a smug possession.
And then you slap your own wrists, hissing to yourself to shut the fuck up.
“She’s nice,” you argue out loud, thin air holding no debate. “She’s kind, and I like her. She’s good for him.”
And then the air replies. Good for him, it swirls, but you could do it better.
Your arm lifts, lingering for a beat before batting the thought away.
Three weeks. Three fucking weeks, between pushing yourself out of his embrace in bed, and pulling yourself back into it – armed with a pregnancy test and a chest full of fear. Three weeks of dodging him, of your cheeks bubbling with embarrassment and regret anytime you thought of it; of hoping to God that Alice or Diane or Steve and Kris across the street wouldn’t clairvoyantly know what had transpired that night and corner you on your own front lawn.
A one-night stand. That’s all it was. Two lonely bodies, excitement enough to convince you both that it was a good idea; a fitted suit and a backless dress crumpled together on the floor. Liquid courage lacing it all together.
Three weeks, then, of reminding yourself how it felt: how amazing you were together. Your hand between your legs and Joel’s name between your teeth.
Fuck. If only he knew. Goodforhimgoodforhim she’s so good for him but I’m better.
You did it better. You know you did. The sun was cresting the horizon by the time the two of you stopped. You hauled yourselves down to breakfast and sat at least three people apart, made forced conversation with Maria about the DJ stumbling off with one of her cousins, while the ghostly ache of Joel’s body churned somewhere deep inside you.
It travels through your veins the way that everything does right now: urgent and unforgiving. A need to be dealt with, immediately. Coursing through your body, an arrowhead pointing somewhere you know it shouldn’t. But your hands lift anyway – following it, loosening the waist of your sweatpants and skimming beneath your underwear.
Your body lights at the first touch. The first dip of your middle finger against the plush over your clit. Knees bend, thighs part. You push your underwear down your hips, settling your bottoms loose on your legs. You’re already wet. You’re already there.
Good fucking girl. She’s good but I’m better, right? Take it, baby. Does she take it like I take it? Take it. Can she take you like I did?
Quicker and quicker and quicker, your fingers heavy on your clit. The other hand sifting between your folds, dipping to collect a glimmer of wet. Yeah. Just like that. Do you fuck her like you fucked me? You feel what you do to me? Fuck no, you don’t. You’ve never fucked anyone like you fucked me.
Head back, eyes fluttering closed, lips parting to breathe answers to a man who isn’t here. To a man who, as he dips sourdough into an overpriced soup, sure as hell isn’t thinking about that time he fucked you so good he got you fucking pregnant.
Well. Maybe he is. You are, right?
Voice without body, drawl etched in your memory. Think she can take it all? You hum in amusement, waiting for him to answer his own question. Yeah, she can.
Attagirl. Your legs spread further, knee lifting as you insert two slick-coated fingers. His hands are on your thighs, following the dip of your hips, holding your waist as you guide him back inside. Attagirl. That’s my – Fuck, Joel, you’re so b– That’s my fuckin’ girl. Take it. Touch it. His thumb on your clit – his, not yours. You like that? Yeah, that’s nice, ain’t it?
The flesh of your breasts filling his palms, squeezing and nipping and rolling between. The warmth leaking between your legs: his and yours and fuck, he’s so deep and he’s filling you again and he’s groaning as more dribbles from where he splits your body around his own, holding you still until he’s done. Until he’s empty.
“Joel,” you whine, a third finger pushing in.
Between your hips. Headboard hammering against the wall. The sun hanging loose at the bottom of the sky. Gonna make me come again, baby. Do it. Do something irreversible. Change me forever. Fuck me fuck me fill me and then pull out, push back in with the wet squelch of your come mixing with mine and changing me forever. Making me brand new. Making me yours.
Another moan. Louder. Sharper.
Yours yours yours. All mine? All yours. We’re good at this. I know we are. Who fucks you like this? No one – No one – just you – just me. It’s so big, fuck, but I can take it. Been thinkin’ about this all fuckin’ day, baby. All I do is think about you. All I fucking do – You gonna come for me? – is think about you.
Know you need it. Let ‘em hear you, downstairs.
Fuck, I’m thinking about you. Come home. I need you to come home, need you to –
Fuck me, Joel, I’m –
Good girl.
– fuck me.
Atta fuckin’ girl.
She’s good but I do it so much better.
We’re good at this. ‘s do it again.
She’s not as good as me.
Again? Again.
She’s not as good. She’s no fucking good.
Your walls clamp around your fist, entire body shuddering to a stop. Breath held by something shaped like the hook of his accent, two fingers either side of your throat. The same smirk on his lips that convinced you in the first place. Fuck, baby, fuck me.
“Joel,” you cry out, the sound ripping between your vocal cords, punching against the ceiling and reverberating in your ears. Your body convulses on the mattress, back arching and slackening again. “Fuck, I’m – oh, my –”
Just feel it, baby. Feel me. You got it.
Let go.
Your lungs lurch open again, breath flooding in like waves spilling over the gunwale and rushing down to pool at your feet. A lulling rock to your movements, chest rising and falling like the steady tide. Soothing, coming down. Foam and salt carrying the flotsam away, the jagged glass of his name disappearing to sea again.
And then he’s gone.
And you’re just alone in your bedroom.
Last you checked your phone, now face-down on the carpet at your hip, it was eight p.m. Streetlights on, the sky painted by the pale dregs of daytime.
Now, you lie in near-darkness, blinking up at the ceiling. Hand sifting through a bag of glow-in-the-dark stars, comparing the different sizes, considering where to stick them, and then tossing them back in frustration.
Your front door clicks open, a pause between the sound and his voice.
“Anyone home?” Joel calls, and you lift your wrist as though he can see it from the bottom of the fucking stairs.
“Up here,” you eventually announce, knuckles rubbing your tired eyes until Catherine wheels spatter across your eyelids.
His shadow splits the light from the hallway, the long rectangle crossing over your swollen belly. “The hell are you doin’?” he asks, wandering in.
You lift the bag. “Decorating. The hell are you doin’?”
He pulls your nursing pillow from its temporary home in the crib and tosses it down on the carpet, bending to lift your shoulders and slot it underneath. “Scooch,” he says, groaning as he lays back beside you. He smells like whiskey and cologne. All woody, pine and spice.
“You got a bad back,” you warn him. “You shouldn’t be all the way down here.”
“You’re seven months pregnant,” Joel clicks his teeth, “neither should you.”
“What if you get stuck ‘n can’t get back up?”
Offense pulls his brows together. “What if you do?”
You smile in response, feeling the heat of his shoulder against yours. Sucking the scent of him through your nose. The pair of you exchanging smirks and batting eyelashes, wrapped in the cool darkness of the room. It’s juvenile and intimate.
You’re trying not to think too much about it.
“I can’t fucking figure this out. I put two of the big stars over there,” you point to the far corner of the room, streetlight splintered by the shades on the ceiling, “but it looks stupid having two so close. So, then I thought,” moving your arm to the right, “a cluster of smaller ones, right over the crib. But I couldn’t move the damn thing to climb up, so…I’ve been down here ever since.”
Joel lifts his hand, stopping your train of thought. “Please do not climb on anything, bein’ that you are…with child.” And then, when your eyes roll to meet his, he grins, adding, “Nesting got you good, huh?”
“You should see my kitchen cupboards. Never been tidier.” Your expression dissolves, voice quietens – your most desperate plea since that morning you shook hands on his doorstep. Your broken wardrobes and his lonely wedding invite. “Will you help me?” you ask.
He thinks it over less than once, dragging his gaze from the twirling star in your fingers. A quick shake of his head, like it’s obvious. “’course I will. ‘s what I’m here for.” And then he yawns, lowering a hand absentmindedly to settle on the curve of your stomach; a gentle pat in greeting to Duck.
“How was dinner?”
“Good,” Joel lies.
“Vanessa okay?”
“Good,” again.
“Sorry.”
Joel’s eyes roll, fingers pausing. “Why do you always gotta be sorry for som’?”
You shrug when you realize it’s not a rhetorical question. He’s genuinely asking. “I don’t know. Just tryna be polite. I know you’d probably rather be at home right now, not…deciding where some plastic fuckin’ stars should go.”
“For my kid’s bedroom? For you?” He huffs something shaped like disapproval. “Do me a favor – stop with the sorrys, alright?”
“I’m not even done with the last fucking favor I said I’d do you.” Your eyes flit down to your bump.
He stares blankly. You know there’s a laugh gathering like hot air on a windowpane behind his eyes, threatening to shatter the glass.
“Fine,” you concede, “dickhead.”
“Better.”
You sigh, looking back down at the phosphorescent shape in your hands. Turning it over and over and over, matching the rhythm of his fingers tensing and then untensing on your belly. His fingers, matching the rhythm of your chest rising and falling with breath. The room quiet. The night’s eyes averted, even just for this moment.
“If it’s anything,” Joel says, “I think the stars look alright.”
Another stolen smile. Another defiant show of teeth. You place your hand on top of his: a thankful gesture, an invitation. Something in between.
Joel blinks back at you, his eyes flitting from yours to your lips. The dim light in the room swallowing the two of you whole, secluded in the upstairs of your home. And you think, Kiss me, kiss me kiss me kiss me, and you will the words over your tongue in a ragged breath – hoping that Joel might breathe them in and feel their sharp edges as they absorb into his bloodstream, each cell flipping like the star in your hand and whispering the same two words to him: Kiss her kiss her kiss her.
But right then –
There’s a burst of movement. Under your fingertips. A fluttering, like bubbles popping right below the surface of your skin.
Your eyes snap down at the same time Joel’s do; your fingers separating and hovering over your tummy.
“Did you – did you feel –?”
“Yeah. Did you?”
“Uhuh. Was that –?”
“I don’t know. Was it?”
He takes your hand, pressing it back against your stomach with his on top. Your knuckles safe in the canopy of his palm. Both staring into space as you hold your breath.
“They’re not…they’re not doin’ it, now…”
“Maybe it was just –”
“Wait! Did you feel that?”
A second burst on your womb, a tiny beat on the other side of your bump. A wide grin breaks across your cheeks, a disbelieving laugh escaping.
Joel laughs, too. “Is that – is that the first time they’ve ever –?”
“Yeah,” you sniff, tears prickling at the corners of your eyes, “that’s the first I’ve ever felt ‘em, anyways.”
“Wait,” Joel says, lifting his hand and holding a finger up. Just yours on your belly. “They doin’ it?”
Your head shakes.
When he lowers his hand, Duckie kicks again. The two of you lean in to one another, exchanging laughter. You lift your own hand, watching his expression as he waits patiently.
But then his head shakes, too. “Nothing. They’re only doin’ it when it’s both of us.”
“What the fuck?” you laugh, replacing your hand and waiting for the baby drum. “How can they even tell? What the f–?”
You shift your hands around the globe of your bump, pausing every so often to feel for Duck’s movements. A tiny fist punching, or a heel kicking, or an elbow shoving right above your navel in a way that’s bordering on painful, but numbed by the sheer thrill of it.
And for a while, it’s all you do: play tag with your unborn baby, giggling when they respond to your tapping fingers and cooing voices.
Joel sits up, leaning on his elbow to talk to his kid; runs two fingers across your shirt like a pair of legs scaling a cotton covered hill. And he laughs, and you laugh at his laugh, as if he’s a kid himself again – tearing apart gifts on his birthday, gasping and throwing his head back with glee at whatever he uncovers.
“It feel weird?” he asks, glancing up at you.
“So fucking weird,” you tell him.
“Does it hurt?”
“More…ticklish, if anything. Might get kinda annoying, if they start doing it when I’m tryna sleep, or somethin’…”
Joel lowers his jaw to your stomach, whispering, “You know what to do, Duckie. Make your daddy proud.”
You slap his shoulder, muttering, “Asshole.”
“Alright,” he says, splintered by a laugh. He pushes himself to his feet, swiping the bag of stars from your side. “Let’s get these up so you two can get some sleep.”
You groan as he pulls you upright, one last pat on your stomach, looking at you a second too long and a touch too meaningful. Too warm, too inviting.
It’s the calm before the storm, though you’re still stood motionless. Still trying to work out whether the tornado is moving away, or headed directly for you.
At five in the morning, Vanessa’s sister calls her.
“Heart attack,” Joel tells you a few hours later, the rustle of paper crinkling in your ear. The truck hums in the background. He speaks through a mouthful of sandwich. “Her dad always had a condition, but they thought they were managin’ it with medication,” another crinkle, and then, voice even more obscured, “but he got rushed to hospital durin’ the night, and…”
“Poor Vanessa,” you reply, nail drawing shapes on the curve of your bump in attempt to lull Duck into a more relaxed state than the sharp kicks they’re throwing at your ribs. Now big and strong enough to do considerable damage, your voice falters each time they swing. “Is she – son of a bitch – is she okay?”
“Shaken up,” he says, turn signal ticking over his voice. “She’ll be alright. She’s pragmatic like that. Problem is – they’re in Houston. Her whole family. So I guess that’s where the funeral’s gonna be.”
You swing your legs off the couch, heaving your awkward, nine-months-pregnant body to your feet – the irritating scratch of hunger suddenly gnawing at your stomach. “Yeah?” you say, waddling through to the kitchen. “So?”
“So,” Joel takes another bite of sandwich, “she has to – I mean, we have to…go. To Houston.”
“We?” You slot the phone between your cheek and shoulder as you fish out a couple slices of bread.
“Me ‘n Vanessa.”
“Uhuh,” you carve a knife around a jar of peanut butter, “you gotta be there for her.”
Joel sounds a little defensive. “I know. And I am. I’m goin’ to be. ‘s just – I gotta be there for you, too. For – for Duck.”
Your stomach swirls, a fire catching which lights your chest in a trickle of flame.
“You are. You will be. Houston’s only, like, three hours away.”
He sighs.
The turn signal fills the silence between you, between Joel and an appropriate answer. Clicking like the sound of a tennis match, his head spinning between his grief-stricken girlfriend, and the third-trimester mother of his child.
“I’m here,” he says, and you hear the squeal of brakes out front. “Give me a sec.”
The door pushes open as you sink back into the couch, balancing the plate on the planet beneath your breasts. Joel crumples his sandwich paper in his fist and lowers his hand over the back of the couch, scrunching his fingers over your belly as he passes.
“Thought you hated that stuff,” he calls over his shoulder, disappearing into your kitchen.
“I had a craving,” you say, ripping the first bite from your sandwich. “You made me hungry.”
He returns a minute later with a glass of water which he sets down on the coffee table in front of you. He lifts your legs, letting them fall gently in his lap when he collapses into the opposite end of the couch, heels of his palms pressing against his eyes.
You tap his thigh with the ball of your foot and he turns to you, placing a hand over your ankles. A sticky paste of peanut butter and bread between your molars, you ask, “What’shup?”
Joel holds back a smirk at your chipmunk cheeks. “Just – just worried that you…you know, while I’m gone, is all.”
You scoff, gulping. “Come on. I am not gonna go into labor in the, what – two days? How long would you even be gone?”
He seems to wince at the thought, fingers sifting through his hair – a gray sweep sat casually over his left eyebrow; flicks following the curve of his ear towards the hinge of his jaw. “Less than that, if I can help it.”
“Joel.”
He turns to you, saying your name just as deflated in response.
“You have to go.”
He rolls his eyes, thumb and middle finger massaging his temples. Crosses his arms and huffs like a teenager. “Well, I ain’t happy about it.”
You snort, unable to hold it in as you take another bite. “I ‘on’t think Vanesha’sh too happy about it, either, to be honesh wih ya.”
Joel’s jaw slackens, a choked laugh bursting from the back of his throat. He lifts a cushion and swings it in your direction. “Heartless. That’s heartless, you know that? Jesus, baby.”
He leaves on Saturday morning.
You stand on your porch, watching him shove a suitcase into the backseat of his truck, squinting in the sunlight as he stalks across your front yard. Joining you in the shade, he leans into you, shoving you lightly.
“Quit it.” Your hand locking with his, steadying yourself. Something in the back of your mind begging him not to let go.
And as if he can hear the thought: “I can stay. You know I can stay, right?”
“I don’t want you to stay,” you tell him, sweeping the hair from his forehead. “We will be fine. We’ll stay up late, eat junk food and watch TV; I’ll do audio description for Duck…”
He scoffs, glancing across the street.
“…and then you’ll be back home, back to buggin’ the hell out of us. It’ll be Monday before you know it.”
Joel’s jaw tightens. “And what if…?”
“You really think that’s gonna happen? You think your kid’s that much of an asshole?”
He doesn’t miss a beat. “Yeah,” he shrugs, tongue in his cheek, “they’re half you.”
“Alright,” you click your teeth, turning away from the simper on his lips, “why don’t you just fuck off to Houston now, asshole?”
“I’ll fuck off, that’s what I’ll do.”
“Uhuh. Here’s hoping you don’t break down, or get a flat, or get struck by lightning, or anything.”
“You’re so funny,” he whispers, leaning closer.
“Hm. Now go.”
His jaw turns, beard grazing your skin. And then his lips; soft and warm, damp when he kisses your cheek. A moment too long. And he doesn’t pull away, doesn’t lean back the way you both know he should. No, he lingers – his lips by your ear, eyes flitting up to the street to make sure nobody sees.
“Joel –”
“I know.”
“We shouldn’t –”
“I know.”
But your arm is hooking around his neck, asking him to do it anyway, and his lips are lowering to yours, submitting to your request, and what’s supposed to be a goodbye kiss lasts at least a few seconds too long for it to mean anything less than a don’t go kiss.
You pull away when you feel the wet dab of his tongue against yours, realizing with an ice-cold shock where you are, and who he is, and what’s happening. Realizing how fucking stupid it’d be for both of you, how catastrophic and terrible the outcome.
A one-night stand.
A one-night stand.
A one-night –
He leans his forehead against yours, nose nuzzling your cheek. “I’ll call you when we get there.”
Your arm loosens, letting him go.
Just – letting him go.
Saturday Night Live ends just after midnight.
You arch your back into the couch, your swollen belly pushing forward. It’s an effort to get to your feet, what with the steady ache in your back all day, the weight on your front, and the fucking human being smushed into every vital organ inside you.
A deep breath feels like it inflates your lungs only halfway, Duck using the bottom half as a fucking ass cushion, and scaling the stairs takes another ten minutes – by the end of which, you’re slumped against the handrail, pausing before making off for your room.
You sink into the mattress, creasing the cool, smooth sheets. Duck stirs inside you, stretches out and throws a right hook against your bladder. You curse under your breath, hoisting yourself back to your feet.
“We gotta sleep, baby,” you hum, swaying back and forth with a hand under your belly. “Shh, ‘s okay. Take your fuckin’ fist outta my bladder, you little asshole.”
Whichever traits of yours and Joel’s have blended into the human cocktail growing in your uterus, you know one thing for certain: this kid has your stubbornness. The weight remains on your bladder, regardless of how much swaying, or pacing, or rubbing, or threatening you do.
You growl, wandering through the upper floor of your house in attempt to shift Duckie, or distract yourself, or, at the very least, tire the two of you out enough to fall asleep.
From the nursery door handle hangs a little wooden star, a tauntingly sleepy smile painted on it. You push the door open with two hesitant fingers, stepping into the still bedroom, the weak wash of streetlight meeting moonlight on the greenish walls.
You suck in a deep breath, floorboards squealing as you take your first step. Over the crib hangs a plastic mobile, soft plush shapes twirling slowly. The matching changing table slotted alongside it, a rocking chair over by the window.
You pad across a fluffy rug and lower yourself into the chair, tilting back and forth on your toes as you glance around one of the two rooms you and Joel have spent the most time in since that October morning bonded you forever. A baby duck ornament perched on a shelf above the dresser, its orange legs dangling. A multi-photo frame Joel’s mom bought you, both scans in the first two slots and the third empty, lying in wait.
Your breathing fragments, struggles, eyes slipping over to the baby clothes hanging in the closet. “You know, little Duckie,” you whisper, rubbing your bump and thinking back to Tommy’s words six months ago, “you are a pretty lucky kid.”
The hooded towel robe on the back of the door, the perfect size for a newborn. The framed prints sat atop the chest of drawers, waiting to be nailed to the wall: a rainbow, a frog, a starry sky.
“You got two houses. Two bedrooms, all to yourself. You got two parents who already love you more ‘n the whole world. And,” you gulp, “you got Vanessa. And she loves you, too.”
You glance down, watching the tiny pulse of movement when the baby stretches in your womb. Your hands scoop them up, as if holding them closer than they already are. As if already cradling them, forcing yourself to feel less alone.
Duck seems to quieten, to still; seems to consider what you’re avoiding. Reads between the lines, hears the words you’re not speaking.
Two of everything, you think, and I barely even had one.
The most evidence you have of being loved by anyone in your life is the house you live in. Four brick walls and three decades’ worth of belongings, more inheritance than memories. But they roll around like marbles – they echo against the walls when they hit them. There’s nothing binding them, no thread of love, or family, or anything real enough to hold it all together.
You’re the only living organ inside a skeleton’s cage. A lonely little heartbeat, making noise for no one to hear.
And that’s the way it has been, at least since you were eight. The absence of warmth and safety isn’t anything new to you – it left the second your parents did. The last scrunch of your mom’s nails on your head, the last kiss of her lips to your plump little cheeks. The passing over to your grandma, like you were cargo, like you were a box to be checked.
Maybe you found some distant flicker of heat in the way Joel looked at you, the day you told him you were pregnant. Maybe you saw the same glimmer of a flame that you used to see in your mom’s eye. The rosy smell of her perfume, the feel of her finger inside five of yours. Maybe, for the first time since you were a kid, you felt safe.
We’re gonna work it out, he said. I’m here. We’re in this together, alright? I am not running out on you.
Together. And yet, now, sat in your child’s nursery – a room built from scratch by Joel’s two hands and strung together by every beat of your heart – you’ve never felt more alone. The same two hands that are wrapped around Vanessa right now, consoling her, wiping her tears away, massaging her shoulders and sweeping her hair from her eyes.
And the same heartbeat which quickens now, fueled by an angry desire, an impulse scratching deep into your flesh to march all the damn way to Houston and tear the pair of them apart. Like he’s yours; like the way he touches you and looks at you and talks to you means anything more than his child growing inside you.
Like it’s you he’s touching and looking at and talking to, and not Duck. Like his attention won’t cease to shine on you, the second this little baby leaves your body.
And then, washing over the scorching hot sand of anger: a foam-lined wave of guilt. Of shame, for wishing for the breakdown of something that clearly makes the two of them happy. That makes Joel…happy.
He doesn’t owe you anything – he was never yours to begin with. Just one drunken night, a mistake until you noticed the two pale lines on the pregnancy test. And by that point, he was already hers again. You had missed him without even knowing it.
You sigh, pushing up from the rocking chair and reaching for a tissue from the changing table. Turning back, giving the room one last teary glance before closing the door, you sniff.
“You’re just…the luckiest little kid who’s ever gonna live.”
At one twenty a.m., cicadas chirping and trees rustling, the low breeze carrying the sounds through your half-open window – your back begins to ache. A blunt, gnawing pain. Feels like your period, and in your doze, you stuff a pillow between your legs and pray you don’t stain the sheets with a show of blood.
The realization comes over you as if that stifling breeze flips to freezing. You slowly come around, eyes peeling open as you think it over twice, then three times, then four. Duck shifts somewhere deep inside you, somewhere you’ve never felt them shift before.
“…No. Not right now, Duck. You gotta give me, like, twenty-four hours. Just – wait until your dad gets ho–”
A blinding pain interrupts you, the moonlit-blue room fading out of focus for half a second before you’re wide awake, clutching the bottom of your spine where you’re sure the kid just tore a fucking hole straight through your uterus.
“You’re a fucking dick,” you whimper, fingers clenching in tight fists around the bedsheets. “You’re a fucking – dick.”
One twenty-three. You go into labor.
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weebsinstash · 10 months ago
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Sitting here watching that clip of Valentino with that demon girl going "you're gorgeous! Do you need a job? 🥰" and started thinking of Val either intentionally or unintentionally making Reader feel massively insecure and ugly and Val using that to manipulate them
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I've mentioned "oh what if your job is serving him drinks at his club" but what if he also starts dragging you along when he goes out like some kind of weird PA. Like he's just throwing random bills at you that he clearly isn't counting like it's pocket change in a very "yeah sure whatever just do it bitch" kind of way so you put up with it, it's good income, but it's still... WEIRD. He's going to get his antenna done at the salon, and you're like. Having to STAND THERE beside his chair, you're not even in the lobby waiting room, you've gotta be WITH HIM, and you just get all these windows into his cunty personality where he's spoiled and mean to service workers and is a total fucking diva and it's extremely off-putting I'm sure
He's in a night club hitting on people whose bodies are absolutely insane like I'm talking GYATT city, ass and titties, you've got twunks and you've got hunks, and you're like, in sneakers, off to the side, head down playing games on your phone since you can't even put earbuds in because you unfortunately have to keep an ear open since he'll order YOU to bring drinks, not just for him, but for these complete strangers who don't even work for him too, AND he'll let them be fucking mean to you. You bring some bubble butt twink who's on Val's arm the daiquiri he asked for and he gives you a very clear look up and down before laughing, cuddling up to Val, "yeah I can SEE you need new employees 😋" and they all laugh Including Fucking Valentino
I dunno, I'm on the fence. It really changes with the story. You get the yandere who are obsessive but more abusive-adjacent and then you have the more true-blooded kind that won't accept any slander of you at all. Like can you imagine Valentino's smile just dropping off his face because some chick like, tells you you have cellulite or even something MILD like your mascara is bad or idk what are, male insults.... you have a flat ass??? And Valentino just instantly shoves them away "okay you're done bye, let the door hit you on the way out 🤭"
But today we're talking about angst and feeling fucking miserable so. Over time it just, makes you feel so horrible about yourself to go to these nightclubs. It isn't even about fucking Valentino, it's about how you're sitting here watching everyone EXCEPT YOU receive all this fawning and compliments and attention, even if Val is faking some of it just to lure in more workers. You see a girl who has the perfect skin and you run fingers over an ice pick scar on your cheek, male reader sees a guy who's tall but muscular with nice facial hair and you feel your own baby face and smaller build, there are people thinner than you, curvier than you, stronger than you, smarter than you, and you watch all of them get called gorgeous and beautiful and handsome and sexy and you're just the fucking dweeb who gets teased, mocked, BULLIED
One night Valentino is sitting there talking to another girl, "oh my gosh, honey, I would TOTALLY do body shots off of you. Hey, can we get some shots over here? .... helllooooo, I SAID can we get some shots? ...bitch if you make me repeat myself again--" and he looks over and you're not even there. It's like ice. Suddenly without warning you're not there and he doesn't know what to do because you're ALWAYS there and whenever you're not it's because he LETS YOU leave??? Like??? He's immediately standing up even if it knocks away the people hanging off of him and he's looking around, "you BETTER be in the fucking bathroom--"
And over the crowd of people he sees you on the opposite end of the club, as if you were actively trying to put as much distance between you two as possible, and you're with a guy, some big furry monster boy, and you laugh with a big smile and Valentino GRINDS his teeth as he realizes it's been ages since you laughed around him, let alone at anything HE'S said, and you're actually drinking with this guy where you would always be way too stiff and cautious around Val (although he also really wouldn't let you drink anyways, being more of a waiter when you're 'on the clock')
Obsessed with the idea of Val making Reader carry around combs and brushes to comb his antenna/fur and Val sees you using them on another guy. like I think he'd go absolutely violently fucking crazy honestly because 1. Those are HIS and he is a bougie Gucci material man like those are high quality things being used on some RANDO 2. Those are for HIM, you're using them on someone ELSE 3. The person using them on someone else is YOU, YOU'RE brushing another man, YOU'RE cuddling another man like some kind of UNGRATEFUL WHORE--
When I say you suddenly look up and you're being GRABBED, HAULED UP to your feet by your arm, grip on you so tight it's ready to fucking bruise, and Val just shoots this guy in the head, like cartoonishly powerful gun just splatters the dudes head from what should have been just a single bullet hole I'm sure. You're like vaguely traumatized and trying to tell yourself the man will regenerate and be fine but now Valentino's got a gun in his hand and he's furious and you just start CRYING. He doesn't even CARE about the people he was flirting with anymore, if he has any employees in the club with him he doesn't even call out that it's time to go, he just starts DRAGGING YOU to the limo and will just LEAVE EVERYONE there because he's in such a rage, also, have you guys seen the posts where people point out there are moth squeaking effects when he speaks sometimes. So he's just fucking mad, voice cracking, shouting, squeaking, and i think it'd be funny if he spends like 15 minutes screaming about THE GUY while he has you like all but glued to his lap on the ride home and doesn't say a single thing about what you did. Just manic ranting on his phone as he HAS to call Vox, "oh my god you wouldn't FUCKING BELIEVE what this piece of shit did in front of me, the ugliest fucking guy I've ever seen was--" and you're like trembling wondering when he's going to pivot and realize like, you were also. Intentionally willingly sitting with that guy.
But he doesn't even like. Acknowledge it that way. He just keeps ranting about the guy touching something that doesn't belong to him, he's gotta replace all his fucking combs now, oh my GOD Vox like SERIOUSLY-- and then it's probably Vox that's like, with a disinterested voice, "sooooo.... WHICH whore did this happen to again???" And Valentino without hesitating just straight up says your name, "the nerdy one, you KNOW which one I'm talking about"
And that's when you just start to blubber cause you're tired and you're tipsy and you're mentally worn down, "oh OF COURSE I'm 'the nerdy one'!! You drag me all over the fucking place and I never get any time to myself and I have to WATCH everyone ELSE have fun, and when I finally find someone who calls ME cute, calls ME pretty, you fucking SHOOT HIM!" and you're just, face in your hands crying and you can't see it as Valentino GRINS like some fucking MONSTER because, "Aw, pobrecita, is that what this is about? You're lonely? ❤️w❤️"
And you're just mad and crying and pouting and you're telling him to go fuck himself and actually starting to get a little mouthy and have an attitude with him and he doesn't even care because how upset you're getting is going right to his head. even if you don't want to, you're jealous of him giving other people attention instead of you, and now he's watching you get all upset and sniffly over it and he's so full of himself, this makes him feel so powerful that he's reduced you to this insecure bawling state, and he's rubbing your shoulders, "awwww, don't cry mami, you should've told me you were wanting some 'attention'"
At this point you could be literally slapping his hands away but he's gonna keep pulling you close to him on purpose and NOW, now he's laying on all the fucking compliments, stroking the tops of your thighs. He knows exactly what scent you're using in your hair. Oh, you're wearing the nail polish you bought during one of your first months here; he's always liked this color on you. He's commenting and bringing up things you didn't expect him to notice let alone remember about you and... you're just so weak to it.... you're lonely... and he's here... and maybe it's the smoke or his cologne or what but he smells so good, he's so close, your head feels a little funny--
The rest of your night blurs together after that, but when you wake up, you're not at your place, or the studio, or anywhere you mildly recognize. You're in a bed way too big for someone your size, and you're especially not used to SOMEONE ELSE BEING IN IT WITH YOU. Val just has you caged in all of his arms and is passed out drooling in a post alcohol, post drug, post fuckathon coma, and you can FEEL in your muscles and in your body that you two were up to some wiiiiiild shit together.
IF you may manage to sneak out of V Tower without being stopped or caught, it won't make hin suddenly forget all the things you told him, or him now knowing how it feels to have your hands on his body, or how it looks to have your big sad wet eyes looking up at him and then sparkling with one of his compliments. Usually he WANTS bitches to be gone when he wakes up but, this time? When those eyes open and you're not there? Instantly feeling rejected, mad, irritated, he can't exactly identify why, he's just MAD you ran off without telling him and he's instantly blowing up your line to figure out where you are, and now you have become a recipient of The Voice-mails
"Heeeeeeey, baby, so, it's so funny but I just woke up and I can't find you in the tower? Did you run off to get breakfast somewhere? You KNOW you shouldn't run off without telling me first; I need you to come on back here ❤️"
"-- so answer your phone you fucking SLUT!! You better not be with another fucking guy, or I swear to fucking GOD--"
"--It just stresses me out that there are so many different kinds of people down here, I worry someone might hurt you, amorcito. I can't help protect you if I'm not there, soooooo, why don't you just, tell me where you are--"
"Is this fucking funny for you, you cunt?! You get all worked up about how PATHETIC AND SAD you are and then leave me? Leave ME? ME?! You're LUCKY i even TOUCHED YOU AT ALL--"
"Heeeeeeey, oh my gosh so this is so funny ummmm, Vox just let me know that Velvette borrowed you for something, soooooooooo, please don't listen to any of those other voicemails, ok? You know how CRAZY you make me, right? Don't forget you have a shift tonight, and if you even think about not showing up, I have some hellhounds that know your scent already and they'll drag you back here by your hair, sooooo, see you later love you byeeeeee ❤️"
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froggiewrites · 2 months ago
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i read every single one of your works in one sitting and oh my god. your mind. your words. you're easily one of the best writers on this hellsite. it should be a crime you don't have more followers because your writing is criminally underrated
i saw you were taking requests and i don't want anything too specific but there isn't that much ace content and i really miss my man. a bit of hurt/comfort bc i love pain and then kissing it better
i was thinking something along the line of your Follow Through work (sorry if it feels repetitive but i live for this type ace content) but really I'll be happy with whatever you put out just have fun and go to town with it <3
Ahhh thank you so much this is so sweet 😭😭 I only started posting really recently so receiving sweet messages like this feels so unreal honestly, it just makes my heart so full. I loved writing this, I always love writing sweet stuff for Ace, so thank you for giving me an excuse to write something in this vein again! I hope you like it 💙
Blinders On
Pairing: Ace x Reader
SFW
Summary: You're in love with Ace. Everybody seems to know this but him. Warnings: Fluff, Miscommunication, A Little Self Loathing, Very Little Hurt/Lots of Comfort Word Count: 2.2k
You really can’t tell if Ace is politely rejecting you, or if he simply doesn’t understand your advances. You’re being terribly obvious, enough so that the rest of the ship (and probably the entire rest of the fleet) are well aware, teasing you for it at any given opportunity. If you have to hear one more man making obnoxious smooching noises whenever you two walk past you’re going to throttle someone.
“It’s honestly getting pathetic at this point.”
“Yeah, it hurts to see someone put their pride on the line like this with no reward in sight. Bring a tear to my eye, really.”
Their voices are teasing, not cruel, but your shoulders tense anyway. You hate feeling pathetic. If he just turned you down, you would be more than willing to just lick your wounds and move on, no matter how hard it hurt. But he never did. He never pulled away, or pushed you further from him. He just never pulled you closer, either. You were left in limbo, treading the line between friend and lover, never crossing to either side.
“What’s got you frowning like that?” You jump when you feel two fingers at the edges of your lips, gently forcing them into a smile. Ace is in front of you, nearly nose to nose, and you can see the candlelight dancing in his eyes and painting his cheeks a gentle orange. He looks beautiful, as always, as he grins at you. “That’s better. Now you try again without my help.”
You force your mouth into a smile despite yourself.
“There we go.” He laughs quietly, and you can feel his warm breath on your face. He’s horribly, unbearably close, close enough that you would barely have to move to feel his lips against yours. The urge is overwhelming, but you can’t let yourself, so you scoot back slightly, smile growing a bit shakier.
He frowns a bit, something unnamed flashing in his eyes, before he leans a little further back as well. “Care to share what made you so upset? You were glaring a hole into the table.”
“Oh it’s…it’s nothing big. Don’t worry about it.” You frankly would rather throw yourself overboard than look Ace in the eye that you were sitting here pathetically pining over him.
He frowns deeper. “You know you can always share with me, right? I’m a good listener, I swear.” A mocking laugh explodes behind him from a nearby eavesdropper, and he leans forward before muttering, “I’m good at listening to you, at least.”
Your cheeks heat. You don’t want to embarrass yourself like this, but he’s looking at you with those sweet puppy dog eyes, and maybe this could be a chance for you to finally figure out how he feels about you. “Well…it’s just…” your eyes slide to the several crewmates visibly listening in. “Can we talk in private?”
“Of course!” He’s on his feet instantly, offering you his hand to help you up. He pulls you up as though you weigh nothing, and while that makes your stomach flutter a bit, it’s nothing compared to the way he keeps a hold on your hand while leading you away. You can feel the heat radiating from him, every callus on his hand, the way his fingers lightly rub against the back of your hand. It takes all of your self control not to melt.
He leads you to his room, leading to wolf whistles from some passersby, and you internally groan at all of the comments you’re going to get after this. But he gently sets you on his bed before kicking off his boots and sitting next to you, on his knees, looking at you expectantly. “Is this good?”
“Yeah, thanks, Ace.” He gives a blinding smile at that, terribly pleased to have helped. “So I’ve been dealing with…an issue, lately.”
He nods, urging you onward.
“So there’s this guy…”
He winces, the expression so quick you almost miss it. 
“And I’ve been trying to figure out how he feels about me.” You curl in on yourself a little tighter. “But I genuinely can’t tell if he’s noticed how I feel and he just doesn’t…feel the same, or if he somehow doesn’t know.” This is terrifying, laying it all bare, but if it leaves a chance for something else, something better, isn’t it worth it to be brave?
But Ace remains silent. His face is frozen halfway between shock and despair, staring at you with wide eyes. You blink at him, confused, and gently reach forward to take his hand. “Ace?”
He flinches when you touch him. “Ah! Um, sorry. Advice. You wanted advice.”
“If you’re willing? You don’t have to.”
“No, I–I can.” He seems flustered, but you can’t really tell which part of this shook him. You try to brace yourself for oncoming rejection, just in case. “...You really don’t know if he feels the same?”
“I have absolutely no idea. And nobody else I’ve asked does, either.”
Another flash of hurt, the frown of a kicked puppy. “You went to other people before me?”
You rush to correct. “They came to me. I think they felt bad for me, honestly. The entire ship has noticed and they can’t tell if he likes me either, and a lot of people have been making fun of me about it. So a few people asked me if I was alright.”
He furrows his brow. “People have been making fun of you? Who?”
“Almost everyone, really. You didn’t notice?”
“No, I didn’t.” His expression shifts to something close to guilt. “How long has this been going on?”
“About…a year or so?”
“You only joined the crew a little more than a year ago.”
“Yeah.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah.” You can’t keep the exhaustion from your tone. You want to say it hasn’t taken a toll on you, that you let it roll off your back, but the weight has been resting on your shoulders, dragging you further and further down. It’s only a matter of time before you snap entirely. “It’s…it’s a bit much, sometimes. But the only way to get them to stop is to stop trying to get him to notice me, and if I stop that he never will. And I think he’s worth all of it, really.”
“Hm. I’m…sure he is.” You can hear the sting in his voice, like cold water on an open wound. “He has to be, for you to want him so badly.”
“He’s the best man I’ve ever met.” You can’t keep the affection from your voice, or the warmth from your cheeks as you shyly peer at Ace through your lashes. You can’t place the faraway look in his eyes, hazy and unfocused.
“He better be.” He clenches his jaw briefly before relaxing it, closing his eyes and shutting you out. You see his fingers digging into his thighs as he turns away from you and takes a deep breath. “You should just tell him, I’m sure he’ll reciprocate. He’d be an idiot if he didn’t.” His voice is strained, sounding like there’s an unshakable weight on his chest.
“Are you okay?”
“I’m fine, sweetheart. Don’t worry about it. You should tell that bastard how you feel.”
“Bastard?”
You can see every muscle in his back tense as he continues to face away from you. “Did I say bastard? I meant lucky bastard.”
“It…doesn’t sound like you did.”
“How could he be anything less than lucky, to have someone like you?”
He really isn’t getting it. Even now, he just doesn’t fucking get it. “Are you mad at me, Ace? Or him, I guess?”
“I’m not mad,” he snaps, unconvincingly. “I’m not…I’m not upset. It would be ridiculous for me to be upset, I have no reason to be. Not with you, or with whoever it is. That would be silly. And I’m not. Silly.”
“...Right.”
Are you going to have to spell this out for him?
“And since I’m so definitely not-at-all mad, can I know who it is? So I know who to congratulate later.”
You sigh. “You really have no idea?”
“...I think I might have one.”
You lean forward a bit, trying to angle around him to look him in the eye, but you accidentally brush your chest with his back and he jumps, scrambling away before turning around to face you. “Who do you think it is, Ace?”
“Is it Marco?”
What?
“What?”
“Is it…is it not Marco?” He furrows his brow.
“I–no. It’s not Marco.”
“Thatch then?”
“No! Oh my god.”
“Izou? Or–”
“It’s you, Ace!”
His eyes go wide and he freezes. “It’s…me?”
“Yes.”
He absolutely lights up like a firework with the biggest, most sincere grin you’ve ever seen. “It’s me?” He leans forward, close enough that you can see every fleck of color in his dark eyes. “It’s me? Really? You mean it?”
“Who else could it possibly be?” You can’t keep the hint of laughter out of your voice at the idea you could love anybody but Ace, as though any man you had ever met could beat him for best. 
Before you know it, his arms are around you, his comforting weight pressing you into the bed beneath you. “I didn’t think it could ever be me.”
Your arms wrap around him in turn, pulling his head into your neck as he presses his nose into you. “Why couldn’t it be you? You’re amazing, Ace.”
“I can’t believe you believe that.” His voice is soft as he pulls himself apart for a second, allows himself to fall into your embrace and forget the world. “I didn’t think you could want me. I already didn’t get how you could like me, let alone more. You’re so…everything and I’m so…me.”
“I don’t think there’s anything in the world better to be than you.”
There’s a wetness pressing into your neck, but you don’t comment. “No one has ever said that to me before. I don’t…I don’t understand how I tricked you, but–”
“Portgas D Ace. You didn’t trick me. I just saw you for who you were, and I loved you because of it. Not in spite of it, not because I somehow didn’t see it. Because you’re you, and I don’t know what could be better than that.”
“Almost anything else?” He mutters it weakly. “I really hoped you would…would think about me like I think about you. I just didn’t think it was possible. Was it really that obvious?”
“Every single person on this ship knew before you did. Someone was making fun of me for it at breakfast, directly in front of you, and you still didn’t notice. It was really just because you didn’t think I could like you?”
“It genuinely didn’t seem like a possibility to me. I figured I was just going to be pining after you for the rest of my life, y’know? Have to see you find someone else as wonderful as you are and run off together, and pretend I was happy for you. Which I sort of would be, I guess. I want you to be happy. And I didn’t think I could do that for you.” He pulls out of your neck, and you can see his eyes are glistening, a few stray tears making their way down his freckled cheeks. He looks you in the eye, while his own filled with a strange mix of affection and self loathing. “Still don’t, really. But I’ll try.”
You cup his cheeks in your hands, gently brushing away his tears. “No one else could make me happier than you, Ace. I know that for sure. You are the kindest, brightest, most wonderful man I know. You have no idea how amazing you are, how you inspire the people around you. You’re so loved, and it’s not because you managed to pull the wool over everybody’s eyes, or anything silly like that. It’s because you deserve it.” You lean up, lips brushing softly against his before you pull back again to speak. His lips chase yours, making you giggle. “You deserve every bit of it, Ace. And if you don’t believe me I’ll just have to show you. Every day, until it sticks.”
“And if it does?” His voice is nothing but a whisper as he stares at you like you’re the greatest treasure on the seas. “Will you stop if it sticks?”
“No way in hell. I’ll double down. Triple down, even.”
He gives you a shy grin. “Guess I’ll have to figure out the truth pretty fast, then. I’d like to see what double this looks like.
“I guess you will.”
The next kiss takes your breath away. It makes the teasing you and Ace are sure to receive when you leave the cabin worth it a million times over. But right now there isn’t a crew jeering at you. The only thing in the world right now is Ace, on top of you, his warmth enveloping you as he kisses you like he’s been waiting a thousand years to do it.
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atebyflowers · 5 months ago
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toxic!dealer!ellie who favourites you over everyone else, yet refuses to make your relationship offical. one in the morning parked outside of a gas station, rain drops falling outside the smoke-fogged windows, tears streaming down your face, your head laying on her shoulder — she's rolling another blunt and rubbing your thigh in an attempt to make you calm down. "i know baby, i'm sorry" she rasps out, dragging the blunt to her lips before placing it between yours. "you're not sorry" you choke out, sniffling as your wiped away your own tears with the sleeves of the sweater ellie lenses you whenever you smoked together. She sighed at your words in slight annoyance, trying to keep her tone relaxed — she leaned back further in her seat as she watched you clear your eyes, taking the blunt from your hands before speaking. "there's nothing to cry about y/n, you knew this from the start" she replied, taking another hit.
holding your face in your hands for a moment — in the limited space, you turn to face her. your eyes puffy and red, hers identical though for a different reason — she lets out another sigh before sitting up to be closer to you. your faces closer than ever, she places the half smoked blunt back on the tray before moving her hands to caress your cheeks. Giving into her touch, you let your eyes close for a moment taking in the feeling of her.
"you know why it's like this... can't lose business" she'd remind you. something everyone had reminded you. your friends called you an idiot for getting involved with her in the first place, insisting she was nothing more than a fuck girl who bribed every pretty girl she came across with free weed. constantly reminding you that she wasn't willing to settle down, that she needed to be available so girls would keep buying from her thinking they had a chance — just to end up fucked before she moves onto the next. with you, it was different in your mind. she never persuaded you the way she did with the other girls. with you, she spoke gently. never pushing for anything more than what you wanted. always prioritizing your needs over her own, something even your friends didn't believe at first.
yet, despite any of this — you weren't hers. you could never be hers she warned you from the beginning. ellie insisted it was nothing more than a friendship, telling you anything more would ruin her income. "then why do you keep me around" you spoke just above a whisper, her hands still placed on each side of your face. "i don't get it ellie. we've fucked so many times.... so many fucking times. you've got everything you needed. why do you keep bringing me back?" your eyes began to water again — ellie scoffing "you can't put all of the blame on me" she says, "you run when i call y/n". and with those words your laughing in disbelief. "god ellie you know why the fuck i come back" you raise your tone, ellies eyes locked on you as you push her hands away from your face — ellie letting you before she slightly guides your chin back to face her. "look at me" she breathes out and you obey — tears blurring your eyes. "you have more of me than anyone else..." she informs, using her thumb to catch the single tear you let fall. "isn't that enough?" she questions, her tone seeking your cooperation.
with her desperate eyes piercing through your body, you stood no chance playing against her games tonight. it was tiring to say the least, but everything in your body craved her. even if she wasn't yours — she was right. you had more of her than anyone, you should cherish it while it lasts. pleased as you give in, she kisses your temple before brushing your hair out of your face. "i'm yours right now" she adds on, "be mine right now" she states, you staring up at her with wide yet drained eyes. "are we done with this bullshit now baby?" "got it all out?" she questions, her tone almost mocking you. embarrassed, you simply nod, pulling yourself into her embrace. "atta girl" ellie praises, placing kisses on the top of your head as you conceal your remaining tears by burying urself into her body — back at square one.
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lilacgaby · 2 months ago
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title: entranced.
pairing: katsuki x fem! reader.
through all stages of his life, katsuki was entranced with you.
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katsuki was destined for greatness. everyone told him so, it was engrained in his mind from the moment his quirk manifested.
as a kid, he was top of the hill always, king of his crew, every game they'd play would leave him the champion. he was the fastest, the strongest, the coolest.
his ego fluctuated with every new person he'd meet, how he felt none could match up to the god-given power of his, until his last year of junior high you joined his class.
you, who hung around deku, not minding that he was quirkless.
you, who he found so entralling.
you didn't really socialize to the other classmates, so he didn't know what your quirk was..
at least not until the teacher announced you and deku were applying for U-A beside him. he scoffed, "you two? heroes? don't make me laugh, maybe you'll be lucky enough to be assistants at my agency, and that's a huge if, quirkless idiots."
"i'm not quirkless, and midoriya isn't an idiot. so take your foot out of your ass and learn to respect people." you grabbed midoriya's hand and guided him out.
that was the first time you ever spoke to him and he didn't have a rebuttal.
he glared as you two walked out the hallways together, his pack of goons followed him as he walked down the alleyway. they ran away when he got captured by the villain.. but you. you and deku ran against the crowd to go save him. despite how he insulted the two of you.
that was the first time he'd seen your quirk. behind deku who was aimlessly scrapping the gooey flesh of the villain attempting to take him over, you had taken to making magma rock, that turned to lava upon contact, and burned the flesh of the villain. this caused the villain to create an opening, that allowed allmight to save him.
he didn't talk to you after that, he didn't have the chance. the most you'd given him after that was a nod.
he saw you everywhere and in everything now. in the orange flowers, in the dandelions, in the way the clouds shaped.
he wasn't looking for you in the entrance exam, no way. but when he saw the familiar silhouette of your body next to deku's, he felt his heart race. you looked amazing, your body a bit more toned now, he assumed youve been training alongside deku all this time.
he wasn't looking at you.. but, he saw the look on your face as you pouted, mouthing to deku the session you were placed in. he was in the same one.
he wasn't looking for you or anything, but when he spotted the aftermaths of your quirk, referring to the massive amoungs of molten iron from the pointed robots, he sped up.
the sight of you in action sent cupid's arrow through his heart.
you, now covered in the magma rock yourself, with your hair being the main source of the lava pooling around the exam center. the robots turning to nothing as you blast each shot with pinpoint accuracy, the small sighs you'd occasionally let out birthing fire from your mouth.
there was now a range of symbols, red and apparent, marking your body. from your face to your arms and even your legs. he was in utter awe of the chaos, yet elegance of your quirk.
you were breathtakingly horrifying.
as soon as time was up, he'd gotten the top score of course. but it wasn't by a landslide as he'd hoped, because you were only 0.5 points away.
he'd hoped to see you again. and he did, in class 1-a, you'd taken a spot next to deku again, and a girl with pink cheeks. he tsked as he put his feet on his desk, prompting a guy with engines on his legs to reprimand him.
he was deeply moved whether you used your quirk, whether it was in the quirk physicals, team battles, or mock missions.
he didn't know how or why, but he'd managed to become friends with you. along with the rest of his group, or the people that followed him around and forcibly made him their friend, you'd hang around.
his conversations with you were usually short, he didn't know how to talk to you. you made him feel weird, a feeling he never really understood.
not until their first encounter with villains that is.
the second they were teleported, he was on a mission to look for you. kirishima walking behind him as he tried to find you and make sure you were okay.
but when he saw you cornered by a group? he went rabid, sending shot after shot onto them until they were unconscious. he helped you stand up. "you okay?" he held your hands in his.
"i.. im fine bakugo. thank you."
he felt his face flush, he was lucky his hands were covered by his outfit, because he was sweating inhumanely. you finally let go of his hands, making him sigh before you suggested, "let's go regroup with the others, k?"
he nodded, and joined back in the fight.
he got more comfortable with you after that, holding your hand seemed to be casual for you two now. he sat beside you at lunch, his hand on your thigh as you two ate. you trained together, studied together, hung out in his room together.
napped together once, his heart leaping out of his chest when he realized it wasn't a vivid dream, and that you really were next to him.
when he was kidnapped you were apart of the group who saved him, giving all for one a nasty burn on his bald head.
after that, he realized how you were on his mind constantly.
he wondered if you ate, if you slept, if you studied, how you scored.
when you were training at the agencies if you'd be safe, he knew you were capable, but because of the destructive quality of your quirk you couldn't use it often.
he'd confess his nightmares to you on late night calls. how the phantom pain of being suffocated would sometimes come back to him, how he hated being approached from behind.
and he'd go to bed, his heart racing when you confessed yours. "honestly.. my biggest nightmares are about losing you."
you were even on his mind when he died. alongside all-might and deku, stood you. he wanted your validation, he wanted to be a hero to you, that's what he thought about in his last moments.
when he was revived, he saw you in the hospital. you were alive. except for the severe burns on your arms from your body's over exertion, the only other wound was in your stomach.
his heart ached as he saw you. there was a gash in your stomach.
after weeks of rehabilitation, he couldn't take it anymore.
he bowed his head to you, confessing his feelings that had been boiling over for years. your arms were still bandaged and one of his was still in a cast. you grabbed his face, pulling him up to yours before planting a gentle kiss on his lips. you kept him there after, looking into his red eyes.
"i've liked you too for a while, bakugo."
"katsuki."
"...katsuki."
you started dating. he worked to strengthen his hand, as you worked to up your bodies tolerance for your quirk. throughout the years you'd grown even closer. he got you a gorgeous promise ring, scratching the back of his head as he said, "it's just a placeholder for the next one. so, sorry if it's--" you cut him off with a hug and a kiss.
you graduated alongside eachother, where he gave another speech and you had to try your hardest not to burst out laughing at the memory of his first one.
you both worked hard, becoming pro heroes, and surprisingly
becoming popular because you two were dating.
you'd constantly be caught out together. photos of katsuki's smiles as you smear frosting on his nose, you two laying down on a picnic blanket and staring into each others eyes, you two walking around the streets.
sometimes you'd catch him watching your fights. could you blame him? he thought you were gorgeous, always. but especially when you were fighting. the look on your face, your actions, your confidence,
it'd send him spiraling.
you attended gala's together, him at your side. you've received thousands of modeling contracts, but you only accept ones that'd let you pose with katsuki.
you still made him nervous after all this time, so he'd audibly gulp whenever you circled him, striking poses so he'd laugh.
you became the nation's couple, which shocked the two of you to no avail.
he proposed to you on your 5th anniversary. true to his word, the ring was extravagant, it glimmered from all angles. he explained, looking into your eyes as he held your hand, "i could never find anything as gorgeous as you, but i hope it comes close."
your wedding was huge. you actually had two, one for close friends and family, where his mother took the reign to plan everything since you two were so busy.
and a huge public one, media and journalists allowed to see the million dollar wedding you two had to celebrate your years together, and katsuki's undying infatuation with you.
he was wrong though, because he did find something as gorgeous as you.
your beautiful baby girl that you welcomed to the world.
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deanwinchestersbabygirll · 5 months ago
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Sam Winchester, Hero
-warnings// angst, fluff, SMUT, MENTION OF SA!!
-lil summery// kind of my spin on the pilot episode, based when Sam’s in college, best friends to lovers trope
Sam x reader
Part 2
word count// 3330
(Gif from Pinterest)
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Your eyes burned as you continued to read the same line over and over, exhaustion threatening to take over your body any minute "hey you okay?" You looked towards the soft voice to see your best friend Sam, you nodded "yeah I'm just trying to finish this chapter I can't hand in another late assignment" you said stretching your limbs trying to wake yourself up 
Sam chuckled "it's after midnight, you’re gonna end up face down on your desk if you don't get to bed soon" you rolled your tired eyes playfully "I’ll be fine I'll just be another half hour then I'm done, you head on home, I'll be right behind you" Sam shook his head "not a chance this place isn't safe at night I'll wait for you" he said going to sit next to you "Sam sweetie, I'll be fine, our apartment is a ten minute walk at most, plus you know I can handle myself, I've kicked your ass plenty of times" you joked making him smile 
"Alright but I want you to knock on my door when your back home so I know your home safe, I'm giving you forty five minutes and if ur not home by then I'll be back here to haul your  ass home" he said firmly, he was always the worrier, that's what you loved about him the most
"I promise, scouts honour" you promised him with the scouts symbol he chuckled as he moved toward the door "see you at home Y/N" he called as the doors closed leaving you alone in the library, You rubbed your tired red eyes and got back to work, your blinking getting slower until all you could see was darkness and a warm fuzzy feeling take over your body.
Almost an hour later you awoke with a start "oh son of a bitch!" You exclaimed quietly looking at your watch, in a panic you shoved your stuff in your bag quickly before running out the big mahogany doors and taking off in a speed walk down the dark campus towards you and Sam's apartment, hoping he hadn't left yet
You were moments away from sanctuary before you heard the sound of loud foot steps behind you, your heart plummeting to your stomach as you picked up your own pace, you were less than a minute away, the footsteps got closer and your heart was beating a hundred beats per minute
The person behind you grabbed your arm roughly turning you around to face a tall brute of a man, glaring at you his lips twisted in a dirty smile "where you heading beautiful?" He asked his grip on your arm tightening making you wince "none of your business now get your damn hand off me you jackass!" You exclaimed trying to pull your arm away 
"Watch yourself now... the nicer you are to me the better I'll make you feel" the man said licking his greasy lips, your stomach turned and you regretted not leaving with Sam earlier. 
Tears pricked at your eyes as you tried to fight him off "if you touch me I swear I'll-" you started to say before a loud laugh cut you off "you'll what baby? Look at me then look at you, who's got the upper hand here?" he mocked before a third voice interrupted him 
"I do!" The voice said and a fist was slamming against your attackers face knocking the brute out, screaming you turned to see your saviour as the tears streamed down you face, you saw Sam looking back at you concern written all over his face "c'mon let's go" he said quickly taking your bag from you and pulling you tightly to his side making your worries instantly vanish as you cuddled into him 
Sam unlocked the door with his free hand, never letting go of you, he locked the door instantly as soon as you stepped inside "are you okay? I knew I shouldn't have fucking left" Sam told you his voice cracking slightly as his hands cradled your face in them as his green eyes scanned for any visible injuries.
"I'm okay Sammy" you assured him but he shook his head, his shaggy hair bouncing as he did "I'm so sorry I didn't get there sooner, I shouldn't have left you by yourself it's not safe i-" "SAM!" You yelled cutting his rambling off, his eyes snapping down to meet yours "I'm okay, I promise, you got me before he could do anything" you promised him, brushing a stray strand of shaggy brown hair behind his ear
He closed his eyes tightly and sighed loudly, his shoulders remaining as tense as ever, he wrapped his strong arms tightly around you, holding you tightly to him
You rest your head against his hard chest, listening to his heart beating like crazy as he breathed in your scent "are you okay sweetie?" You questioned looking up at him
Sam nodded slowly "I'm doing everything I can right now to stop myself from killing that perverted bastard" Sam confessed, his voice low and serious, you chuckled quietly "Sammy your the sweetest guy I've ever met, you don't have killer instincts in you" 
Sam swallowed thickly... little did you know who he really was, how many monsters he'd killed since he learned to walk "...yeah your probably right, come on let's get some sleep" Sam said changing the subject quickly
You stepped away from the his warm comforting embrace nodding your head, a quiet quiver threatening to leave your lips  "night Sammy" you leaned up to kiss his cheek before retreating to your bedroom.
You shivered as you walked into your dark bedroom, you pulled on an oversized shirt kicked off your jeans before getting into you bed, your whole body shook as you lay, the events of the night finally setting in your head
You let the hot tears fall slowly down your face as you fell asleep. 
You awoke a while later, you heart beating like crazy, your face stung as tears, new and fresh stuck to your cheeks, you tried catching your breath before making your way quickly to your bedroom door and down the hall to your best friends room
You knocked lightly on the door but there was no response other than the small snores on the other side, you questioned if you should just suck it up and go back to your own room but you knew you couldn't, not alone 
Taking a deep shaky breath you opened the door tip toeing towards the sleeping giant, "Sammy?" You whispered in a strained voice, "...Y/N... w-what's going on? Everything okay?" Sam quickly shot up suddenly as though he was wide awake. You tried to control your breathing before replying "y-yeah I uh, I-" you struggled to get out before you broke completely, your whole body shaking as more tears streamed down your swollen face
Sam was instantly pulling you down to sit next to him on his bed, pulling your shaking body tightly into his warm embrace, his muscular arms wrapping around you waist as you lay your head in the crook of his neck, "hey it's okay just breath" he said gently trolling your hair from your face "what happened?" He asked quietly stroking your wet hair behind your ear 
You took a deep shaky breath leaning into his touch "I- I just had a bad dream and I didn't want to be alone, can I stay with you, please?" You begged Sam, your heart racing like crazy, Sam's cheeks flushed a deep red as he nodded his head almost immediately "of course you can, you know you can always come to me no matter what" You smiled squeezing his hand tightly as a silent thank you.
Sam stayed in that position for another while longer, just holding you tightly to him as you slowly regained your breathing and the tears stopped rolling, "you ready to lay down?" Sam asked rubbing his hand up and down your cold arms nodding you move to his side, slowly lowering your self to rest against the cold unused pillow in Sam's bed, Sam turned to face you in the bed,
His hand once again reaching out for your own "I promise your safe here, I would never in a million years let anyone or anything hurt you" Sam assured you making your heart swell, "I know sweetie,  your like my very own superhero" you told him making his lips pull into his familiar grin "night gorgeous" Sam said giving your small hand another light squeeze "night Sammy" you whispered back.
You lay there another few minutes just staring into the dark room, this was different than how you felt earlier in your own bed, you felt safe... you just couldn't trust your mind enough to sleep
You turned to your side to face Sam, his eyes already on you "I can't sleep" you whispered lowly to him your faces inches apart as Sam moved closer his arm moving to wrap around your waist as his green eyes stared into yours "it'll be okay, I'm right here next to you" Sam promised making you smile up at him 
Your hand cupped the side of Sam's face gently as you moved closer, just testing the waters, letting him have time to pull away if he wanted to, but he didn't.
Sam closed the small gap between your lips quickly capturing you lips with his, you let out a small gasp as your hand flew to grip the back of his neck lightly, his own gripping your waist pulling you as close as possible to him, you let out a quiet moan as Sam moved you to lay on your back, his body rolling to hover above you 
You wrapped you legs tightly around Sam's hips pulling him down so that his covered cock was pressing against your clothed clit, "oh god Sammy" you breathed out pulling his hair slightly 
Sam moved his kisses down your neck causing your eyes to roll "Sam please" you begged tightening your legs around his hips, sam obeyed as he pulled back slightly to pull his grey shirt and off revealing his muscular chest, you ran your hand down from his toned chest down to his pyjama pants, you swallowed the thick lump of nerves in your throat "Y/N, we don't have to do this" Sam told you sensing your nerves 
You shook your head and smiled up at him "I want to do this, with you" you told him as you gently pulled him back down for a kiss, he smirked into the kiss, his hands moving to the hem of your oversized shirt you'd stolen from Sam many moons ago, he pulled the shirt off your body, revealing your bare breasts to him, he instantly grasped them in his warm hands
You let out a small moan of his name, arching your back from the bed "please touch me" you begged, sam chuckled and kissed his was down your chest taking each breast in his hot mouth before continuing his way down your stomach, he dragged your panties down off your legs, gasping at the cold air hitting your core you move to clench your thighs together
Sam's hands caught your thighs quickly, spreading them wider exposing you completely to him "you look so beautiful like this" Sam said his eyes a darker green, bordering a light brown, Sam blew cold air against your soaking pussy before diving in, you screamed in pleasure your hand rushing to gripe Sam's longer hair, "oh god Sammy! Please don't stop that feels so fucking good" you cried out as Sam sucked hour clit into his mouth and inserting his two long fingers inside your dripping hole "you taste fucking delicious Y/N I could stay between these legs all damn day if you let me" Sam said against your pussy, the vibrations of his deep voice and combination of his thrusting fingers causing your eyes to roll to the back of your head "I'm so close Sammy please!" You screamed in pleasure slamming your head back against the pillow behind you as Sam sped up his movements, all that could be heard in the room was heavy breaths and the sounds of Sam's mouth and fingers working you toward your orgasm
You cried out in ecstasy, Sam's long fingers curled inside of you hitting your g-spot repeatedly his lips wrapping around your clit stimulating you completely, you screamed Sam's name as the coil snapped, your orgasm came crashing towards you causing your body to shake slightly, sam carried you through it, not stopping until you gently pushed him away from you, you legs around his shoulders shaking "that was the hottest fucking thing in the world, I've never had a guy do that to me before" you breathed out, still trying to catch your breath
Sam chuckled giving you lips a small kiss "well you have only dated jackasses who clearly have no idea how to please their girls, if I had it my way I'd have you tied to the bed with me down there all damn night" Sam confessed making your heart pound, you looked at him threw half lidded eyes a smirk playing on your lips "I'm not opposed to getting tied up sometime" you said making sam groan loudly as you pulled him into another deep kiss, your hand snuck it's way into his pants and wrapped around his hard cock, you started to move your hand in an up and down motion before Sam quickly grabbed your wrist stopping you
Your eyes snapped to his in a panic and your heart raced in panic, "What's wrong?" You questioned quickly and Sam smiled "nothing it's just… I'd rather be inside you gorgeous" Sam told you and he kicked the rest of his pants off leaving his big hard cock on full display making your mouth water "do you have a condom?" You struggled to ask as your mouth was suddenly dry
Sam nodded, hovering over your bare body to reach into his nightstand, he quickly pulled out a familiar foil package, he ripped it open quickly with his teeth and rolled it onto his erect member "are you sure your okay with this?" Sam, ever the gentleman asked you, his hands ran up and down your waist in a comforting way making you smile  "of course I am Sammy" you confessed wrapping your legs tightly around his hips and pulling him down to you so he was chest to chest to you
Sam leaned down to capture your lips in a sensual kiss, not rushed or hard like the other kisses, you felt him place his covered tip at your entrance, your pussy clenching in desperation to feel him inside you,
Your moan caught in your throat as Sam pushed his way inside you, filling you up, inch by inch
Sam sucked in a harsh breath, his lips moving to attach to your neck "god Y/N your so fucking tight, can already feel you squeezing me" he groaned out hotly against your neck, you giggled softly as your hands ran up Sam's muscled back, he began to move his hips slowly to rest the waters, there was a slight pain but nothing could take away from the pleasure of having Sam so close to you like this "faster Sammy please" you told him arching against him to allow him to push inside you deeper, Sam obeyed and grabbed your thighs, he pushed them up so you knees were against your chest, your calves hanging over his broad shoulders
Sam pulled his hips almost all the way back before slamming back inside you making you scream in pleasure
He continued to slam his cock deep inside you at a fast pace, hitting your G-spot with every thrust his pelvic bone pressing against you swollen clit adding just the right amount of pleasure "yes!" You screamed dragging your nails down Sam's back as white hot pleasure clouded your vision, you knew your orgasm was fast approaching as the coil in your stomach tightened "cum with me baby" you moaned out, Sam quickened his movements feeling his own orgasm crash against him, he moved his hand down to rub your clit quickly causing the band in your stomach to snap, you screamed Sam's name as your juices came flowing out of you, down Sam's thighs as Sam groaned feeling the condom fill with his hot seed 
Sam continued to thrust a few more times slowly to calm you both downs, whimpering when he pulled out you gave him a gentle kiss on his now swollen lips "that was amazing" you said once you pulled away causing Sam to chuckle, he threw the used condom in his trash can "yeah that was the best sex I've ever had" Sam confessed making your heart race and your cheeks turn pink when you giggled “yeah me too”
Sam pushed a stray hair behind your ear, his eyes staring into your own with intensity “I really like you Y/N, your my best friend.. I mean I know we just crossed the line of just friends but I want you, I mean, I want this, not just sex.. I mean I want you.. all of you” Sam confessed before kissing you quickly to solidify his words 
Your heart pounded against your chest as you listened to Sam’s confession, “I want that to Sammy” you said placing your hands on either side of his face, leaning in to peck his kiss swollen lips a couple of times until the smiles on both your lips made it impossible to keep going “so how about tomorrow after your last class we head down the Chinese place for dinner and we can rent a movie to take back home?” Sam asked you nervously “I’d love that” you told him before going to the bathroom to get ready for bed again, this time in the safe protective arms of your boyfriend.
A couple of hours later you awoke to voices in the kitchen, panic rose in your chest before you turned to wake Sam, surprised when all that was in his spot was cold sheets, you furrowed you brows before getting up, you quickly pulled on your over side shirt and panties before stalking towards the kitchen where your boyfriend and another man were talking  “sam?” You called for him making his head snap towards you “Y/N hey what you doing out of bed?” Sam questioned placing his hand on your arm 
You opened your mouth to answer before the other man moved towards you a big flirty smile graced his lips “wow you are so far out of my brothers league” the man said making sam roll his eyes “oh your Dean! Sam’s told me a lot about you” you said making him chuckle “all good I hope” he said before turning his attention back to your boyfriend before staring at you again “listen sweetheart, I gotta talk to your boyfriend here about some family business would you mind giving us a minute?” He asked trying to be as nice as possible “of course I’ll just-” you were cut off by Sam’s big arm wrapping tightly around yours waist pulling you tightly to his side “no, anything you can say to me, you can say in front of Y/N” Sam told him his chest puffed out in anger 
Dean clapped his hands together in frustration “fine, dad hasn’t been home in a couple days” Sam scoffed and rolled his eyes dramatically once again “yeah, he’ll come stumbling back on in soon enough, just like he always does!” Sam said annoyed, his muscled arm around your waist tightening as Dean sighed lowly 
 “alright, dads on a hunting trip, and he hasn’t been home in a few days”. 
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ALL MY OWN WORK I DO NOT GIVE CONSENT TO COPY OR PUBLISH ON OTHER SITES , I.E WATTPAD, ETC, WITHOUT MESSAGING TO ASK FIRST
For my Sam girlies!
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syxilla · 4 months ago
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Ken sato x !reporter reader
oh, how he wishes you saw him as a man and not a boy.
cw for everything below: age difference (its used for the plot), suggestive (depending on who you ask)
thinking about kenji trying to impress reader in his games. the reader who is older, more mature and composed than him. who always comments on his arrogance in their articles or interviews. honestly, you were his harshest critic! it was your nickname amongst your co-workers as well. everyone knew you held hatred for him, and so did he. you frequently commented on his age and how it isn't smart to put so much faith into such a young and ignorant man and call him a living legend. "he isn't mature enough!" you always stated.
he hated that. his age doesn't make him better or worse than anyone else; he was just better because he was ken sato. but that didn't stop him from trying to act older, at least around you. because it was for you.
he's still so desperate to impress you. he'd do cooler moves in games, smile at the camera more in interviews, and, even though it seemed impossible, he became more prideful. but he couldn't help it! feeling your intense gaze on him as he walked onto the field or got into a stance, it was invigorating.
he especially got a rise out of seeing you roll your eyes, slumping back in your seat, crossing one leg over the other once you realized there was nothing for you to comment on his performance. it was perfect. so perfect that it would (sometimes, if he was lucky) get a small, ever so slight, smile from your lips. even better if he saw you nod your head in approval. so after one of (arguably) his best perfomances yet, one he spent weeks practicing just for his pretty little critic, he walks up to you, ready to soak in all the praise he believed he deserved.
"so... how was that y/n?" he teased, slamming himself into your personal space. it's his favorite place! if you thought it belonged to you, it was also his. "leave me alone, sato." you grumble, not wanting to admit your defeat to him. "it was good, wasn't it? right? righttt?" you push him away and begin walking away, eyes looking straight forward to avoid his gaze.
"oh c'mon, am i really that bad you can't even compliment me?" he pouted playfully, poking your oh so soft cheek, giving it a slight pinch. "fine, sato! you're a good player. you impressed me today, enough for me to even say im... proud of you." if you were to sneeze each time kenji's heart began to race, it'd look like you're having a seizure because of how fast it was.
"then why dont you show me how proud you are of me," this made you halt, snapping your head towards him. "how?" you asked, eyes focused on his lips that quirked up into a grin. "take me out to dinner. tommorow night. let me pick, and i'll consider the debt you owe me paid off." he smiled, taking a step back, allowing you to breathe again. when did you stop? "i'm not indebted to you anyway?" you retort, pushing him back even more to feel like you had the upper hand here. "yes, you are! all the times you've doubted my abilities! am i not worthy of getting an apology? a gift?" he said dramatically, placing his hand on his chest.
you sputter nothing in disbelief, until something clocks inside of your little brain. "are you asking me on a date, sato?" you asked, crossing your arms over your chest, a shit eating grin on your face. he leans down to your level, which is when you register how much taller he was than you, and tilts his head to the side. "and if i am?" kenji's voice goes quieter. "you're not my type." you mock, mimicking his tone. "i like them older." to this, he laughs. "you like grandpa's y/n? you like them near their deathbed?" he joked, trying (and failing) to hide his laughter. "yeah, atleast they're gentlemen, unlike you."
"i may not be the most gentlemanly person on earth, but i am a gentle man in everything else."
oh! oh. now you were entering dangerous territory. not for him, for you. it was so clear what he was setting up as a trap, and yet, despite all the warning signs there was, opened your plump little lips and asked with the purest face ever (even though your thoughts were the complete opposite) "how can i know if youre lying or not?"
and kenji, oh the annoying ken sato who you would never admit admired, not even on your deathbed, stepped closer to you, leaned down near your ear, and said in the loudest voice, loud enough so that you cant mishear him, and quiet enough that no one else can, says
"why dont i show you?"
if your composure was a ship, it would be near the ocean floor, the reason for sinkage; ken sato. right when your last functioning braincell is able to deliver a quip before total failure, someone calls kenji over. "you have a interview remember?" it yelled. "coming!" he smiled sweetly, kissing your cheek ever so softly.
the immature baseball player might not be as immature as you thought...
(thanks for the support on the last one, so i thought i'd write another one because im desperate for this man, like he's desperate for the reader, lowk. also i didnt fully proofread itmso sorry if skme names r missing colors and whatnot)
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kiesbrainjuice · 4 months ago
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imagine kuroo or any other hq character saying 'i know, baby i know' when comforting yn hukjwbvibvinbowudfhbisro
— I KNOW BABY, I KNOW ! multiple
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pr : timeskip!kuroo x reader; timeskip!bokuto x reader; timeskip!suna x reader; timeskip!kageyama x reader; timeskip!oikawa x reader; timeskip!hoshiumi x reader
syn : you have a melt down and they comfort you (ik baby, ik)
wc : 5.3k
tw : cuddles, pure fluff!
a/n : hii ! luvv the idea of that req, I did it for many of my favs and for Kuroo ofccc (one of my favs too) it took a long time to make it perfection(in my opinion) :))
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KUROO TETSURO
The rain drummed against the windows as you curled up on the couch, feeling like the weight of the world was crushing you. Tears streamed down your face, and you couldn't hold back the sobs any longer. That's when you felt the couch dip beside you and a familiar warmth envelop you.
"Hey, hey," Kuroo's voice was soft as he pulled you into his arms. "What's going on, babe?"
You buried your face in his chest, clinging to his shirt. "Everything's unwell, Tetsu," you managed between sobs.
His hand moved to stroke your hair, his touch gentle and soothing. "Talk to me. What's got you so upset?"
Taking a shaky breath, you tried to gather your thoughts. "It's... it's everything. Work's a nightmare, I'm drowning in deadlines. And then there's all this family drama... I just... I can't handle it all."
"I know, baby, I know," Kuroo murmured, his voice filled with understanding. "It's a lot to deal with. But you're not alone in this, okay? I'm right here with you."
You nodded against his chest, his steady heartbeat a calming rhythm. "I feel like I'm letting everyone down," you whispered. "Like no matter what I do, it's never enough."
Kuroo pulled back slightly, just enough to look into your eyes. His gaze was intense but warm. "Hey, look at me. You're not letting anyone down. You're doing your best, and that's all anyone can ask for. We all have rough patches."
"But what if my best isn't good enough?" you asked, voice barely audible.
He cupped your face in his hands, thumbs gently wiping away your tears. "Your best is always good enough for me. And for anyone who really matters. You're incredible, you know that? The way you keep pushing forward, even when things get tough... that's real strength."
You leaned into his touch, closing your eyes. "I don't feel very strong right now."
"That's okay," Kuroo said softly. "You don't have to be strong all the time. That's what I'm here for. Let me be strong for you when you need it."
A small smile tugged at your lips despite everything. "What did I do to deserve you?"
"You're you," he replied simply. "That's more than enough."
You sat in comfortable silence for a while, his fingers running through your hair, occasionally massaging your scalp. The rhythmic motion slowly eased some of the tension from your body.
"Remember that time we got caught in that sudden downpour after practice?" Kuroo asked suddenly, a hint of amusement in his voice.
You couldn't help but chuckle softly. "How could I forget? You tried to cover both of us with your jacket."
"Hey, I was being chivalrous," he protested with a mock pout.
"You were being ridiculous," you countered, feeling a bit lighter. "We ended up soaked anyway."
"Yeah, but it was fun, wasn't it?" He grinned down at you. "We laughed the whole way home."
The memory warmed you from the inside. "And then we made hot chocolate and binge-watched movies all night."
"Exactly," Kuroo said, his voice softening. "Even when things don't go as planned, we always find a way to make it work. Together."
You nodded, snuggling closer to him. "Thank you, Tetsu. For always being here."
"Always," he promised, pressing a kiss to your forehead. "I'm not going anywhere, babe. No matter what."
You sat there for a while longer, listening to the rain and Kuroo's steady breathing. The storm inside you gradually calmed, replaced by a sense of peace.
"Hey," Kuroo said after a while. "How about we order some takeout and have a movie night? Just like old times."
The idea brought a genuine smile to your face. "That sounds perfect."
"Any requests?" he asked, reaching for his phone.
"Surprise me," you said, feeling a flicker of excitement.
As Kuroo placed the order, you settled more comfortably against him, feeling truly relaxed for the first time in days.
"You know," Kuroo said thoughtfully, "it's okay to not have everything figured out. We're in this together, yeah? Whatever comes our way, we'll face it as a team."
You looked up at him, feeling a surge of love and gratitude. "Yeah, we will."
He grinned, that familiar mischievous glint in his eyes. "Besides, I'm pretty sure between your brains and my devastatingly good looks, we can handle anything."
You laughed, swatting his arm playfully. "You're ridiculous."
"You love it," he retorted, leaning down to kiss you softly.
You kissed him back, pouring all your gratitude and love into it. When you pulled apart, you felt lighter, more hopeful.
"So," Kuroo said, reaching for the remote. "What are we watching? Your pick. Just nothing too sappy, okay? I've got a reputation to maintain."
You raised an eyebrow. "A reputation? As what, exactly?"
"As a cool, collected guy who definitely doesn't cry at movies," he said with a straight face.
"Oh really?" you teased. "So that wasn't you sobbing into my shoulder during 'Your Name'?"
Kuroo gasped dramatically. "I was not sobbing. I had something in my eye. Both eyes. For two hours."
You couldn't help but giggle. "Sure, sure. And I suppose you were just 'stretching' when you reached for the tissues during 'A Silent Voice'?"
"Exactly," he nodded solemnly. "It's important to keep your arms limber, you know. Volleyball and all that."
"Uh-huh," you said, your mood lifting with each moment of banter. "And I suppose your nose just happened to be running during 'Grave of the Fireflies'?"
Kuroo clutched his chest in mock offense. "How dare you bring that up? That's a low blow, babe. Low blow."
You laughed outright, the sound filling the room. "I'm sorry, I forgot about your 'reputation'."
"That's right," he said, puffing out his chest. "I'm Kuroo Tetsurou, former captain of Nekoma, and definitely not a crier at emotional movies."
"Of course," you agreed, your voice dripping with sarcasm. "My mistake."
He grinned down at you, clearly pleased to see you laughing. "That's more like it. There's that smile I love."
You felt your cheeks warm slightly. "Thanks, Tetsu. For everything."
"Anytime, babe," he said, his tone softening. "But don't go spreading rumors about me crying at movies, okay? I've got to keep some mysteries alive in this relationship."
"Oh?" you raised an eyebrow. "And what mysteries would those be?"
"Well, for one, how I maintain this perfect bed head," he ran a hand through his perpetually messy hair. "It's an art form, really."
You snorted. "I hate to break it to you, but I've seen you first thing in the morning. That's no art form – that's just your hair rebelling against gravity."
"You wound me," Kuroo clutched his heart again. "Here I am, comforting you in your time of need, and you attack my hair. The audacity."
You giggled, feeling the last of your earlier stress melt away. "I'm sorry. Your hair is perfect, just like the rest of you."
"Now that's more like it," he smirked, pulling you closer. "Keep the compliments coming. They fuel my ego."
"As if your ego needs any more fuel," you retorted, but there was no heat in your words.
Kuroo chuckled, the sound rumbling in his chest. "True. But I'll never say no to praise from my favorite person."
As you settled in to wait for the food and pick a movie, you realized how much lighter you felt. The problems from earlier hadn't disappeared, but somehow, with Kuroo's mix of sincere support and playful teasing, they seemed more manageable.
"Hey, Tetsu?" you said softly.
"Yeah, babe?"
"Thank you. For always knowing how to make me feel better."
His expression softened, and he pressed a kiss to your forehead. "Always. That's what I'm here for. Well, that and to provide eye candy, of course."
You laughed again, snuggling closer to him. "Of course. What would I do without your stunning good looks to distract me from my problems?"
"You’ll never have to find out," he said with a wink.
As you scrolled through movie options, debating the merits of various films (with Kuroo adamantly denying any interest in the more emotional ones), you felt truly at peace.
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BOKUTO KOTARO
The rain drummed against the windows as you curled up on the couch, feeling like the weight of the world was crushing you. Tears streamed down your face, and you couldn't hold back the sobs any longer. That's when you felt the couch dip beside you and a familiar presence settle next to you.
"Hey, hey, hey," Bokuto's voice was unusually subdued as he awkwardly patted your shoulder. "What's... uh, what's going on?"
You buried your face in your hands, your body shaking with sobs. "It's my pet, Bou’," you managed between gasps. "The vet called. They... they said there's nothing more they can do."
"Oh," Bokuto said, his hand freezing mid-pat. "That's... that's really bad. Um, do you want some water or something?"
You shook your head, trying to catch your breath. "I don't know how to say goodbye," you whispered.
Bokuto shifted uncomfortably beside you. "I know baby, I know, w-well, maybe... maybe you could give them a really big hug? That always makes me feel better."
Despite your pain, you couldn't help but let out a watery chuckle. "It's not that simple, Bou’."
"Right, right," he nodded, running a hand through his hair. "Sorry, I'm not good at this stuff. But hey, remember that time your pet ate my favorite knee pads? That was pretty funny, right?"
You blinked at him, torn between laughter and more tears. "Bou’, I don't think now's the time for funny stories."
"Oh," he deflated slightly. "Yeah, you're probably right. Um... do you want me to call Akaashi? He's better at this kind of thing."
You shook your head, wiping your eyes. "No, it's okay. I just... I just need you here."
"Okay," Bokuto nodded, determination setting in his features. "I can do that. I'm really good at being here. The best, even!"
He hesitantly wrapped an arm around you, pulling you against his side. It was a bit too tight, a bit too awkward, but it was comforting in its own way.
"You know," he said after a moment of silence, "I'm not sure what to say to make you feel better. But I'm here, okay? And I'll stay as long as you need me to."
You nodded against his chest, feeling a rush of affection for your well-meaning but slightly clueless boyfriend. "Thank you, Bou’. That means a lot."
"And hey," he added, his voice brightening slightly, "if you want, we could go get some ice cream later. Ice cream always makes me feel better when I'm sad."
You couldn't help but smile a little through your tears. "Maybe later," you agreed softly.
Bokuto nodded, looking pleased that he'd made a helpful suggestion. He continued to hold you, occasionally patting your back or making small, encouraging noises. It wasn't perfect comfort, but it was genuine and uniquely Bokuto.
As the evening wore on, you and Bokuto settled into a more comfortable position on the couch. You were curled up against his chest, his arms wrapped around you in a protective embrace. The rain continued to patter against the windows, creating a soothing background noise.
"Hey," Bokuto said suddenly, his voice vibrating in his chest. "Did I ever tell you about the time Kuroo and I tried to teach Kenma how to spike?"
You shook your head slightly, curious despite your lingering sadness.
"Oh man, it was hilarious," Bokuto continued, his voice taking on that excited tone he always got when telling a story. "So, Kenma's always been more of a setter, right? But Kuroo had this brilliant idea that Kenma should learn to spike too."
As Bokuto launched into the tale, complete with animated hand gestures that jostled you slightly, you found yourself getting caught up in the story despite yourself.
"And then," Bokuto was saying, barely containing his laughter, "Kenma just looks at us, deadpan as ever, and says 'I think I'll stick to setting.' Meanwhile, Kuroo's still tangled in the net!"
You couldn't help but chuckle softly at the mental image. "Poor Kuroo," you murmured.
"Nah, he deserved it," Bokuto grinned. "He's the one who came up with the idea in the first place."
There was a moment of comfortable silence before Bokuto spoke again. "Hey, remember that volleyball match we went to last month? The one where that player did that amazing cross-court spike?"
You nodded, a small smile tugging at your lips as you recalled Bokuto's excitement during that game.
"Well," Bokuto continued, his voice taking on a conspiratorial tone, "I've been practicing that move. I think I've almost got it down. Maybe... maybe when you're feeling up to it, you could come watch me practice?"
The invitation was clearly Bokuto's attempt at giving you something to look forward to. It was clumsy but sweet, and you felt a rush of affection for him.
"I'd like that," you said softly.
Bokuto beamed, clearly pleased with himself. "Great! It's going to be awesome, you'll see. I might even let you toss for me a few times."
You raised an eyebrow. "Let me? I thought you loved my tosses."
"Of course I do!" Bokuto backpedaled quickly. "Your tosses are the best! Well, maybe second best after Akaashi's. But don't tell him I said that."
You chuckled softly, snuggling closer to him. "Your secret's safe with me."
As Bokuto continued to chatter about volleyball, his latest video game obsession, and a funny thing he saw on TV the other day, you found your mind drifting away from your earlier sadness. The pain wasn't gone, but Bokuto's presence and his earnest attempts to cheer you up were like a balm to your aching heart.
You weren't okay yet, but wrapped in Bokuto's warm embrace, listening to his animated stories, you felt like maybe, eventually, you would be.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​
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SUNA RINTAROU
The rain drummed against the windows as you curled up on the couch, feeling like the weight of the world was crushing you. Tears streamed down your face, and you couldn't hold back the sobs any longer. That's when you felt the couch dip beside you and a familiar presence settle next to you.
"Hey," Suna's voice was quiet as he sat down, maintaining a slight distance. "What's going on?"
You buried your face in your hands, your body shaking with sobs. "I didn't get the job, Rin," you managed between gasps. "The one I've been working towards for months. They... they said I wasn't what they were looking for."
"Oh," Suna said, his voice neutral but his eyes softening slightly. "That's rough."
You shook your head, trying to catch your breath. "I don't know what to do now," you whispered. "I put everything into this."
Suna was silent for a moment, then slowly reached out and placed his hand on your back. "I know baby, I know, but it's not the end," he said finally, his voice low and calm. "There will be other opportunities."
Despite your disappointment, you found his steady presence oddly comforting. "But I wanted this one so badly," you admitted.
"I know," Suna replied, his hand moving in small circles on your back. "It's okay to be upset about it. Take your time to process."
You blinked at him, surprised by his insight. "I didn't think you'd understand," you said softly.
Suna shrugged, a tiny smirk tugging at his lips. "I'm full of surprises."
You leaned into him slightly, and he adjusted his position to accommodate you. His arm wrapped around you, not too tight, just enough to let you know he was there.
"Want me to order some takeout?" he asked after a moment of silence. "Might help take your mind off things for a bit."
You nodded, wiping your eyes. "That sounds good. Can we just... sit here for a while after that?"
"Sure," Suna nodded, reaching for his phone with his free hand. "I can do that."
He didn't say much more as he placed the order, but his presence remained steady and calming. Every now and then, he'd squeeze your shoulder gently or brush a strand of hair from your face.
"You know," he said after a while, his voice quiet, "it's okay to feel disappointed. But don't let this define you. You're more than just this one opportunity."
You nodded against his chest, feeling a rush of gratitude for your normally aloof but surprisingly perceptive boyfriend. "Thank you, Rin. This... this helps."
Suna hummed in acknowledgment, his fingers idly playing with your hair. It wasn't an overly emotional display of comfort, but it was genuine and uniquely Suna.
As the evening progressed, the rain outside intensified, creating a cozy atmosphere inside. The takeout Suna had ordered arrived, and you both ate in comfortable silence, with Suna occasionally glancing at you to make sure you were eating.
After dinner, Suna wordlessly pulled you back to the couch, this time positioning himself so that he was lying down with you nestled against his chest. His arms wrapped around you securely, one hand gently stroking your hair.
"Better?" he murmured, his voice a low rumble in his chest.
You nodded, snuggling closer to him. "Much better," you whispered.
Suna's usual stoic expression softened slightly, a rare, gentle smile tugging at his lips. "Good," he said, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead.
You lay there in comfortable silence for a while, listening to the rain and Suna's steady heartbeat. His fingers continued to run through your hair, occasionally massaging your scalp in a way that made you practically melt against him.
"You know," Suna said after a while, his voice uncharacteristically gentle, "I'm proud of you."
You tilted your head to look up at him, surprised. "What for? I didn't get the job."
Suna shook his head slightly. "For trying. For putting yourself out there. That takes guts."
His words warmed you from the inside, and you felt tears prick at your eyes again – but this time, they were tears of gratitude and love.
"Thanks, Rin," you whispered, burying your face in his chest.
Suna's arms tightened around you slightly. "Hey," he said, his voice soft but firm. "Look at me."
You raised your head, meeting his intense gaze.
"You're amazing," he said, his tone leaving no room for argument. "One setback doesn't change that. Got it?"
You nodded, a small smile forming on your lips. "Got it."
"Good," Suna said, pulling you close again. "Now, how about we watch that terrible reality show you love? I'll even promise not to make fun of it... much."
You couldn't help but laugh, the sound muffled against his chest. "You're the best, you know that?"
Suna smirked, reaching for the remote. "I know," he said, his tone playful. "Don't tell anyone though. I have a reputation to maintain."
As the show started playing, you settled more comfortably against Suna, feeling truly relaxed for the first time since receiving the bad news. His presence was like a warm, comforting blanket, chasing away the lingering doubts and disappointments.
Every now and then, Suna would drop a kiss on your head or squeeze you gently, as if reminding you that he was there. Despite his usual cool demeanor, in moments like these, his affection was clear and unwavering.
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TOBIO KAGEYAMA
The rain drummed against the windows as you curled up on the couch, feeling like the weight of the world was crushing you. Tears streamed down your face, and you couldn't hold back the sobs any longer. That's when you heard the front door open and close, followed by familiar footsteps.
"I'm home," Kageyama called out, his voice trailing off as he entered the living room and saw you. "Hey... what's wrong?"
You looked up at him, your vision blurry with tears. "Tobio," you managed between sobs. "I... I failed my final exam. I might not graduate on time."
Kageyama's eyes widened slightly, clearly caught off guard. He hesitated for a moment before awkwardly sitting down next to you on the couch. "Oh," he said, his voice uncertain. "That's... that's bad."
You nodded, burying your face in your hands. "I studied so hard," you whispered. "I don't know what went wrong."
Kageyama sat there stiffly for a moment, clearly unsure of what to do. Then, slowly, he reached out and patted your back. "I know baby, I know…um... it'll be okay?" he offered, his tone more of a question than a statement.
Despite your distress, you couldn't help but let out a watery chuckle at his awkward attempt at comfort. "I don't know if it will be, Tobio," you said softly.
Kageyama frowned, his brow furrowing in concentration as if he was trying to solve a particularly difficult volleyball play. Then, seemingly coming to a decision, he shifted closer and wrapped an arm around your shoulders, pulling you against his side.
"Listen," he said, his voice taking on the determined tone he usually reserved for volleyball. "One failed exam doesn't define you. You're... you're smart. And hardworking. Like when you're setting - one bad set doesn't make you a bad setter. You just... try again."
You blinked up at him, surprised by his words. "Tobio..."
"And," he continued, gaining confidence, "if you need to retake the class, then we'll figure it out. I'll... I'll help you study. Or find someone who can. We're a team, right?"
You nodded, feeling a warmth bloom in your chest despite your disappointment. "Right," you whispered.
Kageyama nodded decisively, then awkwardly pulled you closer, resting his chin on top of your head. "Do you... do you want some milk?" he asked after a moment. "Milk always makes me feel better."
You couldn't help but smile through your tears. "No, this is good," you said, snuggling closer to him. "Can we just stay like this for a while?"
"Sure," Kageyama said, his body relaxing slightly. "I can do that."
As you sat there, listening to the rain and Kageyama's steady heartbeat, you felt your distress slowly start to ebb. Kageyama might not be the most eloquent or naturally comforting person, but his earnest efforts and steady presence were exactly what you needed.
"Thank you, Tobio," you murmured.
Kageyama just nodded, his arms tightening around you slightly.​​​​​​​​​​
As the evening wore on, Kageyama's initial awkwardness faded, replaced by a determined sort of tenderness. He gently maneuvered both of you so that you were lying on the couch, with you nestled against his chest. His arms wrapped around you securely, one hand absently stroking your hair.
"Is this okay?" he asked, his voice softer than usual.
You nodded, snuggling closer to him. "It's perfect," you murmured.
Kageyama made a small noise of satisfaction, his body relaxing further. You lay there in comfortable silence for a while, listening to the rain and Kageyama's steady heartbeat. His fingers continued to run through your hair, the gentle motion soothing your frayed nerves.
After a while, Kageyama spoke up again. "Hey," he said, his voice thoughtful. "Remember when I couldn't get that quick to work with Hinata?"
You tilted your head to look up at him, curious. "Yeah, during your first year at Karasuno, right?"
Kageyama nodded. "I thought it was the end of the world," he admitted. "But then I figured it out. And we got even better."
You smiled softly, understanding what he was trying to say. "You're right," you said. "This isn't the end."
"Exactly," Kageyama said, a hint of his usual intensity creeping into his voice. "You'll figure this out too. And I'll be here to help. We can make a study schedule, like a training regimen. I'm good at those."
You couldn't help but laugh softly at his earnestness. "Thank you, Tobio. That actually sounds really helpful."
A small, proud smile tugged at Kageyama's lips. He leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead. "You're smart," he said matter-of-factly. "Smarter than me in a lot of ways. If I can become the best setter in Japan, you can definitely pass this exam."
His unwavering confidence in you brought fresh tears to your eyes, but this time they were tears of gratitude and love. "You're amazing, you know that?" you whispered.
Kageyama's cheeks flushed slightly, but he didn't look away. "Not as amazing as you," he mumbled.
You reached up and cupped his face, pulling him down for a soft kiss. When you pulled apart, Kageyama's eyes were shining with affection.
"Hey," he said suddenly. "Want to watch some volleyball matches? I recorded a few from the V.League. Might take your mind off things for a bit."
You smiled, nodding. "That sounds perfect."
As Kageyama reached for the remote, keeping one arm securely around you, you felt a wave of peace wash over you. The disappointment of your failed exam was still there, but it no longer felt overwhelming. With Kageyama by your side, his love expressed through actions rather than words, you felt like you could face anything.
As the match started playing, Kageyama's excitement became contagious. He pointed out clever plays and impressive serves, his analytical mind breaking down each move. You found yourself getting caught up in his enthusiasm, the stress of the day melting away as you shared this moment with him.
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OIKAWA TOORU
The rain drummed against the windows as you curled up on the couch, feeling like the weight of the world was crushing you. Tears streamed down your face, and you couldn't hold back the sobs any longer. That's when you heard the front door open and close, followed by familiar footsteps.
"I'm home, love!" Oikawa's cheerful voice called out, but it quickly shifted to concern as he entered the living room. "Wait, what's wrong?"
You looked up at him, your vision blurry with tears. "Tooru," you managed between sobs. "I just got a call from home. My grandmother... she's in the hospital. They don't know if she'll make it."
Oikawa's playful demeanor vanished instantly. In a heartbeat, he was by your side, gathering you into his arms. "Oh, sweetheart," he murmured, his voice soft and gentle. "I'm so sorry."
You buried your face in his chest, clinging to his shirt as fresh sobs wracked your body. Oikawa held you tightly, one hand stroking your back while the other cradled your head.
"Shh, it's okay," he soothed, rocking you gently. "I've got you. Let it all out."
For a while, he just held you, murmuring soft words of comfort as you cried. When your sobs finally subsided into quiet sniffles, Oikawa pulled back slightly, cupping your face in his hands.
"Look at me, love," he said softly. You raised your eyes to meet his warm brown gaze. "We're going to get through this together, okay? Whatever happens, I'm right here with you."
You nodded weakly, leaning into his touch. "I'm scared, Tooru," you whispered.
"I know, baby, I know" he said, brushing away your tears with his thumbs. "It's okay to be scared. But remember, your grandmother is strong. She raised you, after all."
Despite your distress, a tiny smile tugged at your lips. Oikawa's own lips quirked up in response.
"There's that beautiful smile," he said, leaning in to press a soft kiss to your forehead. "Now, what can I do to help? Do you want to go visit her? I can book flights right now if you want."
You shook your head. "Not yet. The doctors said to wait until morning for more news."
Oikawa nodded. "Okay, then we'll wait together. How about I run you a warm bath? And then we can cuddle and watch your favorite movie. Or we can just talk. Whatever you need, I'm here."
You felt a rush of gratitude wash over you. "Thank you, Tooru. I don't know what I'd do without you."
Oikawa's expression softened, his eyes filled with love. "You'll never have to find out," he promised. "Now, come on. Let's get you feeling a bit better."
After the warm bath Oikawa had prepared for you, he guided you back to the living room. He had transformed the couch into a cozy nest of blankets and pillows. With gentle hands, he helped you settle in, then slid in beside you, pulling you close against his chest.
"Better?" he asked softly, his breath warm against your ear.
You nodded, snuggling deeper into his embrace. "Much better," you murmured.
Oikawa hummed contentedly, his arms tightening around you. One hand began to gently stroke your hair, his long fingers working through any tangles with practiced ease.
"You know," he said after a while, his voice quiet but warm, "I remember when my grandmother was in the hospital a few years ago. I was so scared, just like you are now."
You tilted your head to look up at him. "What happened?"
A small smile played on Oikawa's lips. "She got better. And do you know what she said to me when I visited her? She said, 'Tooru, my boy, it takes more than this to keep an Oikawa down.'"
Despite your worry, you couldn't help but chuckle softly. "She sounds amazing."
"She is," Oikawa agreed. "Just like your grandmother. They're cut from the same cloth, those tough old ladies."
He pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead. "Your grandmother has that same strength. And she has you to come back to. That's more than enough reason for her to fight."
Tears welled up in your eyes again, but this time they were mixed with hope. "Thank you, Tooru," you whispered.
"Always, my love," he replied, brushing away your tears with his thumb. "Now, how about we watch that alien documentary I've been trying to get you to see? I promise it'll take your mind off things."
You couldn't help but smile at his enthusiasm. "Okay," you agreed. "But only if you keep holding me like this."
"As if I'd ever let you go," Oikawa said, reaching for the remote while keeping one arm securely around you.
As the documentary started playing, Oikawa's excitement became infectious. He whispered commentary in your ear, his theories growing more and more outlandish as the show went on. You found yourself laughing despite your earlier distress, caught up in Oikawa's boundless enthusiasm.
Every so often, he'd pause his commentary to drop a kiss on your head or squeeze you gently, as if reminding you that he was there, that you weren't alone in this.
As the night wore on and your eyelids grew heavy, Oikawa adjusted your positions so you were lying down, your head pillowed on his chest. His heartbeat was a steady, comforting rhythm beneath your ear.
"Sleep, love," he murmured, his fingers tracing soothing patterns on your back. "I'll be right here. And first thing in the morning, we'll call the hospital for news, okay?"
You nodded sleepily, feeling safe and loved in Oikawa's arms. "Thank you, Tooru," you whispered. "I love you."
"I love you too," he replied softly. "More than all the stars in the universe."
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KORAI HOSHIUMI
The rain drummed against the windows as you curled up on the couch, feeling like the weight of the world was crushing you. Tears streamed down your face, and you couldn't hold back the sobs any longer. That's when you heard the front door burst open, followed by energetic footsteps.
"I'm home!" Hoshiumi's loud voice rang out, but it quickly shifted to concern as he bounded into the living room. "Hey! What's wrong? Why are you crying?"
You looked up at him, your vision blurry with tears. "Korai," you managed between sobs. "I just lost my job. The company... they're downsizing and I... I was let go."
Hoshiumi's eyes widened, his usual boundless energy momentarily stunned into stillness. Then, in a flash, he was by your side, his small but strong arms wrapping around you.
"What?! That's terrible!" he exclaimed, his voice a mix of outrage and concern. "How dare they! Don't they know how amazing you are?"
You buried your face in his shoulder, fresh sobs wracking your body. Hoshiumi held you tightly, one hand patting your back with perhaps a bit more force than necessary, but the gesture was comforting nonetheless.
"Hey, hey, it's okay, I know baby, I know" he said, his voice softer but still intense. "We're going to get through this. You're strong, just like me! This is just a setback, not the end!"
For a while, he just held you, occasionally interjecting with words of encouragement and promises of retribution against your former employers. When your sobs finally subsided into quiet sniffles, Hoshiumi pulled back, his hands on your shoulders as he looked you in the eye.
"Listen to me," he said, his gaze fierce and determined. "You're incredible. Those idiots don't know what they're losing. But you know what? This just means you're free to find something even better!"
You blinked at him, caught off guard by his unwavering confidence. "But Korai, what if I can't find another job?"
Hoshiumi scoffed, puffing out his chest. "Of course you will! You're dating the Little Giant, aren't you? We don't give up! We rise above every challenge!"
Despite your distress, a small smile tugged at your lips. Hoshiumi's enthusiasm was, as always, contagious.
"There's that smile!" he grinned, reaching up to wipe away your tears. "Now, here's what we're going to do. First, we're going to eat some ice cream because that always makes me feel better. Then, we're going to make a plan. I'll help you update your resume, and it'll be so amazing that companies will be fighting to hire you!"
You felt a wave of affection wash over you. "Thank you, Korai. I don't know what I'd do without you."
Hoshiumi's expression softened, his eyes filled with determination and love. "You'll never have to find out," he promised. "We're a team, and together, we're unstoppable!"
After devouring a pint of ice cream together, Hoshiumi led you back to the couch. Despite his small stature, he maneuvered you both so that you were lying down, with you nestled securely in his arms. His body radiated warmth and energy, even in stillness.
"Comfortable?" he asked, his voice uncharacteristically soft.
You nodded, snuggling closer to him. "Very," you murmured.
Hoshiumi made a satisfied noise, his arms tightening around you. One hand began to gently stroke your back, his touch soothing and reassuring.
"You know," he said, his voice full of conviction, "you're the most amazing person I know. And I know some pretty amazing people!"
You couldn't help but chuckle softly at his enthusiasm. Hoshiumi took this as encouragement and continued, punctuating his words with soft kisses.
"You're smart," he said, pressing a kiss to your forehead. "Way smarter than those idiots who let you go."
Another kiss, this time on your cheek. "You're kind. Remember how you helped that lost kid at the mall last week?"
A gentle peck on your nose. "You're hardworking. I've seen how dedicated you are."
Finally, a tender kiss on your lips. "And you're beautiful, inside and out."
Tears welled up in your eyes again, but this time they were tears of gratitude and love. "Korai..." you whispered, touched by his words.
"I'm not finished!" Hoshiumi declared, his eyes shining with determination. "You're also brave, and creative, and funny. Any company would be lucky to have you!"
He cupped your face in his hands, his gaze intense. "And most importantly, you're resilient. Just like me! We don't let setbacks keep us down. We use them as stepping stones to reach even greater heights!"
You couldn't help but smile at his passion. "Thank you, Korai. I feel so much better already."
Hoshiumi beamed, clearly pleased with himself. "Good! Because we're just getting started. Tomorrow, we're going to make the best resume ever. It'll be so amazing, it'll make my vertical jump look ordinary in comparison!"
You laughed outright at that, the sound mixing with Hoshiumi's own joyful laughter. As your giggles subsided, Hoshiumi pulled you close again, nuzzling your hair.
"I love you," he said softly. "And I believe in you. Never forget that."
"I love you too," you replied, feeling truly comforted for the first time since receiving the bad news. "Thank you for always being in my corner."
"Always!" Hoshiumi declared. "That's what the Little Giant does. I'll always lift you up, no matter how high we need to go!"
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wileys-russo · 5 months ago
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Alexia Putellas, “just let me in and accept I’m not going anywhere”, reader’s kitchen
a.putellas II cross the line
you grunted as you worked the dough, sleeves rolled up to your elbows and sweatshirt dotted with flour as you punched, rolled and kneaded it across the board.
with a sigh you grabbed your rolling pin, flattening it before repeating the actions all over again, oven chiming to alert you that it had finally pre heated.
repeating the routine twice over you picked it up and dropped it into a shallow pan, sprinkling the foccacia with oil and massaging it in, gently prodding in holes and finishing it off with some rosemary and seasalt.
you sighed with relief as you carefully closed the oven door, rolling your shoulders and neck which were heavy with tension, making a mental note to con your girlfriend into giving you a massage later not that it often took much to convince her to get her hands on you.
a hot shower helped to melt away a little of the tension, and a thorough washing of your hair helped you to feel like a human being again and not a bag of flour.
you left your skin care for before bed and got changed into a pair of your girlfriends national team shorts and a shirt so large the two of you could have fit into it.
you were happy with how the bread was progressing, your first timer going off as you set multiple other alarms, knowing this next block of time was the most crucial.
baking had always been an escape for you, something taught to you by your grandma and passed down, your sundays spent at her house learning all her tips and tricks while your mum worked her second job to keep a roof over your head.
you'd first met alexia when she was in london for a nike shoot, the photographer a close friend you were temping for while on break from university.
there was a miscommunication from her team which lead to a somewhat heated conversation you could see she felt uncomfortable about, hanging awkwardly to the side while her agent lead the charge.
you'd stepped in and asked if she'd liked a coffee, assuring you were doing a run anyway and that it was no bother to grab her one on the way. she'd accepted but bargained she had to come with you, a little reserved at first but eventually the two of you got to talking.
and as everyone says, the rest was history.
you heard alexia's keys jimmy with the lock, front door popping open as her footsteps sounded in the hall, a small grunt as she wrestled off her trainers and a gentle thump of her gym bag hitting the floor.
"hola mi amor." you greeted with a warm smile, meeting her halfway in a tight hug, laughing as she exhaled tiredly into your neck making you squirm and poke at her sides.
"are you baking?" she mumbled into your shoulder, hunched over as you hummed and slipped a hand down the collar of her top, scratching gently at the base of her neck.
"stop that!" you laughed as once more she exhaled, pushing her away and ignoring her whine of annoyance as you did so. "i have not seen you all day." your girlfriend complained with a slight pout, hands tugging at the back of your shirt.
"you've been gone for three hours!" you rolled your eyes playfully, spinning away from her grabby hands and back into the kitchen. "exactly! tal tortura." alexia huffed, lips still turned downward into an annoyed pout.
"pobre bebé." you mocked as her eyes narrowed but once again you dodged her reaching for you. "i'm baking." you warned with a coy smile, your girlfriend throwing her head back with a dramatic groan as if she'd just been shot.
"the bread does not need your attention princesa, i do." alexia tried to follow after you but grunted as your hand shot out stopping her in her tracks. "nice try putellas, you know the rules." you warned, booping her nose making her scowl.
"this line-" you trailed your finger from the counter to the stove. "-is not to be crossed." you wagged your finger at her. "esta es una regla estúpida!" the footballer argued, still hovering right on the line.
"it isn't a stupid rule when you cook and i am not allowed past it, is it?" you challenged, hands on hips and raised eyebrows. early on in your relationship you and alexia established you both adored the use of the kitchen, only there was just one small problem.
you both hated sharing that space with someone else, even one another.
so the line rule was implemented to save future arguments, and most of the time it worked a charm. however your girlfriend was a passionate woman and fiercely stubborn, and when she wanted something there wasn't much that could stand successfully in her way.
"ale please i spent so long working on this bread i really need it to be perfect!" you sighed as her hand shot out and grabbed your top pulling you over the line, nose tucking into your neck as gentle kisses were fanned across the skin.
"such a perfectionist." your girlfriend teased quietly, silencing your quip back as she pressed her lips properly against yours, the timer going off in the background.
"no no not yet, little more cariño por favor." alexia purred, strong toned arms wrapping around your hips as she held your body captive, back pressed to her front and lips peppering kisses across your neck.
"ale!" you sighed, eyes fluttering closed for a moment as she kissed a little less sweetly, teeth grazing your shoulder. "mm?" she hummed, large hands squeezing your hips as your eyes opened and you spotted the oven, brought back down to earth.
"no!" you groaned, pushing against her and catching her off guard as she stumbled and you darted back into the kitchen. you ignored her complaining about a lack of attention as you sprayed the top of your bread with a spray bottle of oil.
"vale you fussed over your bread, my turn." alexia stomped her foot not unlike a child throwing a tantrum making you smile in amusement. "later, the bread is almost done amor be patient." you winked, bending down to peer through the glass of your oven.
"so i cannot cross the line, sí?" alexia clarified as you hummed, not thinking much of it. though as you turned around, that all changed. "alexia!" you laughed in disbelief seeing her pulling herself up onto the counter.
you watched on as she spun her body and shuffled forward slightly, dropping to the ground with a wolfish grin. "did not cross the line." she took a deep bow as you rolled your eyes. "you are so-" you started to lecture as her grin grew.
"no no." her finger pushed against your lips silencing you as you raised an eyebrow. "just let me in and accept i'm not going anywhere princesa." your girlfriend smiled cockily, drawing your body closer into hers.
"that is because you are so stubb-" you started, words swallowed by the rosy pink lips which pressed against yours, breath hitching as her hands slid around your hips and cheekily squeezed at your ass, alexia using this to slip her tongue into your mouth.
you resisted the urge to moan as her hands pinched and squeezed, paying all of your body just as much attention as your mouth and sending your head into a spin.
but then, you smelled it and pushed away, spinning around and dropping to the oven.
"putellas if this bread is burnt you're sleeping outside for a week!"
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luveline · 11 months ago
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jade i am begging on my knees ….. any time you are up for it …… it would make me very greatly happy to see something with a bombshell!reader x hotch <33333
The office is hot today in the midst of a ninety degree summer, and your coworkers have been forced to strip down to their lightest layers, the women in linen blouses, men with their shirt sleeves rolled up high. Spencer has ditched his sweater vest reluctantly, cooling himself with a makeshift fan fashioned from printer paper, and Emily huffs next to you at her desk, overwhelmed. 
“How aren't you hot?” she demands to know. 
You lean back in your chair with a demure smile. “Mind over matter.”  
She rolls her eyes. “I shouldn't have asked.” 
Hotch's office door opens. You turn in your chair to watch him appear —even Unit Chief's get hot, apparently. He looks flustered in the heat, pink-cheeked and hair skewed ever so slightly, the most unmade you've ever seen him at work. 
You could get used to it. 
He feels you looking, narrowing his eyes. You'd like to think it was playful. For Hotch, it is. 
“Hot, handsome,” you say. 
“I'm fine.” 
“I wasn't asking.” You beam at him. 
“Enough. You know the rules.” 
He doesn't seem too mad, but he's right; you know the office rules. Don't flirt, don't start, and don't text him inside of work hours unless that text pertains to work itself. You'd started calling him instead —what are you wearing right now?— and he'd decided that text now meant any communication lest you find another loophole. You're pushing it. 
“Ah, the rules,” you say, throwing your arm across your eyes in mock distress, before peeking under it to see if he's watching. He always is. “You know rules aren't made for people like me, handsome.” 
“Stop it, final warning. Or I'll have you moved.” 
He makes being his girlfriend very difficult. You roll your shoulders and drop the act. “Hey, I need to talk to you about something.” 
“Afterwards.” 
“No, right now. Please? It's important, I swear.” 
He gestures for you to come up. You take the stairs and cross the landing to his office, where he's already stepped back inside to open the window even further on its hinge. There isn't much wind to breeze, but there is a palpable difference between his office and the bullpen. You join him at the window and let the barely cooler air fan your face. 
“What's wrong?” he asks. 
“Can you give me a quick kiss? It would really lift my spirits.” 
He laughs somewhere deep in his chest. “No, honey. Now tell me what you wanted to tell me.” 
“I have a doctor's appointment next week, on the 13th. It's a Wednesday. I was hoping for PTO, but I can take a sick day if that's not agreeable.” 
Hotch gives you the side eye, brows gently furrowed. “Everything okay?” 
“Wouldn't you like to know.” 
“I would, actually.” 
“Yeah, well, you'll have to beg for it. Not everything in life is free, Hotchner–” You break into laughter as he grabs your waist, not expecting it, your hips tender as he squeezes. “Ouch, you're kinda handsy, you know that?” 
You sound beautiful like this, laughing as you talk, so happy it lines every word. Hotch pulls your front to his, arms crossing casually behind your back, his eyes expectant. “Tell me,” he commands smoothly. 
“Because you asked so nicely, I'm just fine, but I've been feeling a little under the weather. I think I'm anaemic.” 
“And this is the first time I'm hearing about this because…” 
“Because I'm not allowed to talk to you at work!” 
He rolls his eyes as you drop a considerable amount of your weight against his arms. Usually, Hotch would meet your eyes and say, You're punishing me for a rule created out of necessity, or something to that effect, but, despite everything that might say otherwise, he really likes you. Loves you.
“I know, honey, I'm sorry. Maybe we can… allot you a few texts a day.” He analyses your expression. “One a day.” 
You squeeze his naked forearm and lift up to kiss his cheek. He stays completely still while you do it, beside the small stroke of his thumb where it rests on your back. “Thank you. I'll leave you alone now, or we might get caught fraternising with one another and lose our jobs. Oh, wait, that's not actually going to happen–” 
You burst out laughing as Hotch once again squeezes your waist in warning, the hint of a smile on his lips. 
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