#this isn’t to say i don’t eat up praise kink james every time i come across a fic

[i-need-of-a-hobby]

”james potter has a praise kink-“

COWARDS. james potter has jake peralta levels of masochism.

regulus-became-a-death-eater-to-appease-his-parents-black has a praise kink.

[mypoisonedvine]

Double Take | Charles Blackwood x reader (with a special guest...)

summary: Charles Blackwood and Bucky Barnes are twins, adopted by different families.  For the first time, Bucky has something that Charles wants: a girlfriend.  And what’s the point of having a twin if you can’t use it to switch places at least once?

warnings: smut (dub con), loss of virginity, lots of little manipulative things from our classic manipulator charles, infidelity, daddy kink, innocence kink, praise kink, corruption kink, (slightly?), a lil degradation but not really

word count: 4.7k 

Charles Blackwood was definitely not jealous of James Barnes.  Charles had been adopted by a more affluent family than James had; he’d never wanted for anything, while James had grown up in a more traditional suburban environment.  The few times they’d met throughout their childhood, Charles had always been shocked at the way the Barnes family lived.  Hand-me-down toys, no television, and not even a nanny or maid!  

And yet, James didn’t seem to mind.  He’d always been a little dim-witted, Charles figured.  Didn’t he see how well Charles lived and wish that he’d been the one adopted by the Blackwoods?  

No, James was just fine being a Barnes, apparently.  What Charles really could never get his head around was how much they all talked to each other.  Mrs. Barnes asked him more questions in that one afternoon visit than Mrs. Blackwood had probably his whole life.  Mr. Barnes was more excited about Charles’ high marks in school than Mr. Blackwood could even dream of.  

It was all rather peculiar.  Who were these people and from where did they get their bottomless energy, their incessant peppiness?

That was why Charles had stopped visiting them as soon as he was old enough to decide not to.  They’d never been close anyways, and him and his twin had never really gotten along.  Yes, it was odd to know someone who looked so like him but who was so terminally different, but after a while it just became a fact of life for the both of them.  

He’d heard that twins often looked less alike as they got older, so Charles hadn’t expected to see an exact double of himself that day on the street.  For just a moment, the shock was just as strong as it would’ve been if he’d never known he’d had a twin, simply because he spent so little time thinking about it.  But there he was-- Bucky, as he’d heard he went by now, looking like a spitting image in the rearview mirror of Charles’ car, walking down the sidewalk arm-in-arm with a young woman.

You were laughing at something he’d said, your head tossing back as you reached up to shyly cover your smile with your free hand.

And now Charles understood why his brother was never jealous of him.  Sure, Bucky hadn’t had the quality of belongings or opportunities that Charles had, but it was clear that he’d acquired something money can’t buy.

Charles Blackwood was truly and properly jealous of James Barnes.  And he didn’t care for it one bit.  Thankfully, as always, he had a plan.

~

“Bucky, hey!” you called out as you saw your boyfriend across the park.  He didn’t turn at first and you wondered if he hadn’t heard you, but then he did.  

His smile was a little different, somehow, but it still melted you instantly.  He opened his arms and you ran to him, nearly knocking him down with the force of your hug.

“I know it’s barely been a week but I’ve missed you terribly,” you admitted, holding him tightly.  

“I’ve missed you too, darling, more than you could know,” he replied as his hands slipped around your waist.

“Your hair… you’ve done something different with it,” you noticed as you pulled back from the embrace.

“Oh, this?” he smiled, reaching up to touch it.  “Yeah, I think they reformulated my hairspray.”

“I didn’t know you used hairspray!” you giggled.

He shrugged.  “I figure my secret is safe with you.”

“You know, I thought it was sort of romantic that you asked me out with a letter at my door!” you remembered.  “Did you have somebody else write it for you?  I hope you won’t be offended, but I’m confident your handwriting isn’t that nice.”

“Sometimes a phone call is too impersonal,” he explained.  “And I’ve been working on my cursive.”

“Regardless, it was sweet,” you smiled shyly, “you know, old-fashioned-- in a good way.”

“Seems like a nice way of saying that you think I’m behind the times,” he accused with a smirk.

“No!” you denied.  “Being a gentleman never goes out of style.”

“Oh,” he chuckled, a strange sparkle in his eye, “I’m no gentleman at all, my dear.”

~

It was a wonderful date; a walk in the park at first, then a quick stop for some ice cream.  You could’ve sworn he spent more time watching you lick your cone than he did eating his, but you paid it no mind.  If anything, it made you feel oddly excited-- and beautiful.  

You stopped briefly as you passed by a jeweler on the street, admiring a beautiful necklace on display.

“Do you like it?” he asked from behind you, and you could just see his reflection above yours in the glass.

“Who wouldn’t?” you chuckled.  “It’s lovely.”

“Do you want it?” he pressed, his hand coming to rest on your shoulder.  You turned around, giving him a confused look.  

“I mean, sure,” you furrowed your brow, “but… I wasn’t really expecting anything…”

“Let me buy it for you,” he offered.

“F-for Christmas?”

“For now,” he corrected.  “For fun.  Because you deserve it.”

“Deserve it?” you blinked, trying to comprehend his words.  “It’s twenty dollars, Bucky.  It’s more expensive than anything I own.”

“That’s a shame,” he frowned.

“What would I even wear it with?!”

“You could wear it with a feed bag with holes cut for your arms, and you’d still look ravishing,” he dismissed.

“I don’t know what’s gotten into you, but--”

He stopped you, stepping closer and slipping his hands onto your back with a smile.  “Darling, you deserve to be spoiled.  Is it so crazy that I want to see my best girl wearing only the best things?  Now wait here while I pop inside and buy it.”

You barely had time to protest before he’d stepped in the door, the little bell ringing as he waved down the jeweler.  Sure enough, you saw him reach in to the window display to take the necklace out, pulling off the tag while Bucky wrote a check.  You didn’t even know Bucky had a checking account, let alone one with enough in it to buy you such an extravagant gift… not that you were going to complain.  No, you just blushed and smiled nervously, pulling your hair up and out of the way so your boyfriend could put the necklace on you.  His fingers brushing against the back of your neck made your eyes flutter shut as you felt like you could melt into it.

“How does it look on me?” you asked shyly as you turned around, letting your hand trail down the chain.

“Sparkles almost as much as your eyes,” he grinned.

“I don’t know how to thank you,” you murmured.

“Don’t worry about that,” he purred.  “I should probably take you home soon, right?”

“R-right,” you agreed, wishing the date wouldn’t have to end so soon.  “But maybe we should wait longer.”

“Why’s that?”

“Well, my mom and sister won’t be home for another few hours,” you explained, “so we might as well kill some time so I can meet them when they get back.”

“Or,” he suggested, “we could go there now, and I’ll keep you company until they get back…”

You liked that idea, but felt guilt pang in your gut.  And yet, you suddenly didn’t know how to say no to him while you were wearing his expensive gift around your neck.  So, hand-in-hand, you walked back to your house.

~

“You’ve seen the living room before,” you remembered, “but I don’t think you’ve seen the kitchen.”

“It’s a little small, isn’t it?” he noticed as he looked around.

“Yeah, but it’s comfortable,” you shrugged.  “And it’s home.”

“What about your bedroom?” 

You froze.  It was already a bit risky to let him in at all-- if the neighbors had seen, they would certainly talk.  But you cared so much more of what Bucky thought of you than what they did.

“I don’t mean to be too forward,” he chuckled.  “It’s just, don’t you think somebody’s bedroom says a lot about them?”

“You’re right,” you nodded, “and I didn’t think it was forward.  I just worry sometimes…”

“I know,” he smiled, “it’s endearing.”

You led him down the hall and around the corner to your bedroom.  “Now I’m worrying that it’s a little girlish,” you admitted as you opened the door and revealed the pink, frilly visage of your room.  

“It’s perfect,” he denied.  “Innocent and adorable, just like you.”

“Do you remember when you won this for me at Coney Island?” you beamed, picking up a small stuffed rabbit from your bed.  “I’ve slept with it every night--”

You stopped as you turned around to find him standing right in front of you, his face much more serious than before.  You looked down suddenly, afraid his gaze would pierce right through you; his finger slipped under your chin, gently pulling up your face until you looked at him.

“Bucky…” you mumbled, a little surprised.  He said nothing, his hand trailing down over your neck, toying with the chain of your new necklace briefly, before running along the neckline of your dress.

Your body tensed, even as a paradoxical warmth was spreading between your legs.  The way he touched you made you feel nervous, excited, guilty, and desperate all at once.

You’d wanted Bucky to touch you like this for a while now, but you’d known it was better that you didn’t.  As much as you didn’t understand why he was suddenly interested in doing something you both knew was wrong, you weren’t exactly complaining either.

Suddenly he kissed you, and it was so different from every other time he’d done it.  His tongue slipped into your mouth and you let out a little moan of surprise; his teeth grazed your lip and it made you feel wonderfully dizzy.

“You are so beautiful,” he cooed as his kisses trailed to your neck.  You could barely contain your moans then, your head falling back as you melted into his arms.  “So shy,” he continued, “so precious.”

You pressed your body closer to his, loving the way his hard, muscular form complemented your softer curves.  You felt him smile against your skin, giving a playful bite to your collarbone which made you yelp a little.

“I’ve wanted you ever since I first saw you,” he whispered as he pulled you closer.  “Knew I had to make you mine.”

He pulled back and you looked up at him with wide eyes.  “Really?”

“Of course,” he chuckled, “don’t you want me?”

“Yes,” you answered quickly.  “I’m already yours, Bucky.”

His face shifted suddenly.  “Don’t call me that,” he frowned.  

“Wh-?” you began to ask, but he anticipated it.

“Call me ‘daddy,’” he smiled.

You gasped a little, feeling heat burn from under the skin of your cheeks.  “I- I don’t know… it’s a little strange, isn’t it?”

“No, it’s perfectly normal,” he soothed, but you found it difficult to relax as you felt his fingers trailing down your back, and then fiddling with the buttons of your dress. “Not all the time, of course.  Just… when we’re doing something special.  Something secret.”

You breathed out shakily as your dress fell to the floor, leaving you only in your undergarments.  You might have worn nicer ones if you’d realized what would be happening, but he didn’t seem to mind the plainness of them as he let out a low groan, tracing the line of your bra over your chest.

You instinctively began to wrap your arms over yourself but he gently pried them away.  “Let me look at you, darling.  You’re gorgeous.”

He sat down on the bed and motioned for you to sit beside him, and you awkwardly obeyed.  

You jumped when he touched you again-- this time tickling your thigh with the tips of his fingers-- and you chewed your lip as you tried to look away.

“You know what I want to do, don’t you?” he asked you darkly.

“I don’t know if I’m ready--” you murmured, even though you felt your body reacting so positively to the way his fingers moved up your leg.  His touch left goosebumps in its wake, and you felt your back arch without having meant to do it.

“Don’t you love me?” he pressed, and his voice was sad but his gaze never moved from where his hand was now wrapping around your inner thigh.  

“Of course I do,” you promised.

“I just want to show you how much I love you,” he explained, “that’s all.  I’ll make you feel so good, darling.”

You weren’t sure how to respond to that but then he leaned in and placed an aggressive, wet kiss to your neck, teeth grazing over your pulse point, which made your heart race wildly.

“Ohh, Bucky,” you moaned softly.

He tutted disapprovingly as he suddenly pushed your legs apart.  “Try it again.”

His pointer finger drew a delicate line along your panties, right between your lips, and you shivered.  “D-daddy,” you finally stuttered out.  You felt him grin against the slickened skin of your neck.

“Such a good girl,” he praised, and you felt your chest warm with his compliment.

His hands wrapped around your waist and they felt so strong and hot-- not as rough as you’d imagined, but masculine nonetheless.

He gently pushed you back to lay on the bed, rubbing you through your panties as you gasped.  His eyes watched you with a smoldering intensity as you squirmed and whined at the strange sensations his fingers were bringing you.  

You shivered when those fingers pulled the fabric aside, finally touching your swollen and sensitive folds.  Honestly, you’d been expecting more of a reaction, but instead he instantly pushed his middle finger into your opening; he touched you like he knew exactly what he was doing, and though you weren’t sure how he knew what he was doing, you were too focused on how good it felt to care.  He slipped a second finger in and your head fell back onto your pillow.

“O-oh, god, daddy,” you whimpered, your legs quivering a bit as pleasure jolted your body.

“You like how I’m making you feel?” he presumed with a smirk.

“Yes,” you gasped, unintentionally kicking your legs with joy, “yes, yes, yes, I do.”

He leaned in to kiss you again, trapping your mouth in his.  His fingers twisted inside you, putting pressure against your walls just as his thumb brushed over your clit.  Your muscles tightened around him, and he shut his eyes as he let out a low groan.

“I think you’re ready for me, baby,” he decided, his fingers slipping out of you suddenly and instead fumbling with the buckle of his belt.

“D-daddy,” you stammered, jolted from your bliss to shock and confusion.

“Oh, you’re so perfect,” he praised, “I know you’re a little scared.  It’ll be good, I promise.  I could never hurt you.”

He must have sensed that you weren’t quite convinced as you began to move back on the bed slightly.

“You trust me, don’t you?” he asked, his voice deepening while you watched him take his hard cock from his trousers.  You nodded, but the size of it… intimidated you, to say the least.

Before you could slide back again, he caged you in with strong hands above your shoulders.

“Darling, say that you trust me,” he demanded.

“I trust you,” you assured, looking up at him and wondering when his eyes got so dark.

He reached down to spread your legs for him once more, but never looked away from your face.

“Say that you love me,” he requested, quieter yet firmer.

“I love you,” you answered, but the moment the words had left your lips, he pushed his hips forward and forced his cock into you.  You were wet but it didn’t make it an easy fit at all; you cried out and instantly grabbed his shoulders tightly, your whole body clenching with the pain.

"Shh," he soothed, but the way he kissed you was rough and strong and dominating.  He pulled back and slammed forward again, making you whimper into his mouth.

"It hurts," you whined as you turned your face away, wincing when the way he pulled you closer only heightened the sting.

"Oh, I know, but you're doing so well darling," he praised, "you're taking me so well.  It'll feel so good soon, if you're just a little more patient for me.  Can you do that?"

You nodded, and he stilled inside you bringing some relief.  "Say it properly, please," he requested.

"Yes, daddy," you answered shyly. 

He smiled and kissed you quickly before thrusting again, a little slower.  

The pain was starting to dull as you felt pleasure overtaking it, pleasure unlike anything you’d felt before.  You felt so full in a strange but addictive way.  You bit your lip as moans started to pour from your lips.

“Don’t get quiet for my sake,” he encouraged, “I wanna hear you, darling.  I want you to show me how good I make you feel.”

“D-does it feel good for you?” you asked nervously.  He grinned and leaned back to run his hands over your legs, and even kiss the inside of them a few times.  

“Darling,” he growled, “you feel incredible.  You’re everything I dreamed you’d be.”

You sighed with relief, though it turned to a gasp as he began to move faster.  His cock massaged your walls so perfectly, and you felt pressure building inside you as the pleasure turned from relaxed to searing.

“Feels good, doesn’t it?” he noticed.

“Y-yes,” you admitted, feeling your face burn.  You felt guilty for liking it so much.

“It’s okay,” he soothed, “it’s supposed to feel good.  All good girls love their daddy’s cocks.  You love it, don’t you?”

You moaned as you nodded, that pressure getting stronger until you were worried you would get light-headed.  “I… I feel funny,” you stammered.

“You’re about to come, darling,” he explained.  “It’s a good thing.  It feels good.”

“Okay,” you mumbled, trusting him even though you were a little afraid of what would happen when you came.

"Go ahead, come on my cock.  I know you're so close.  Come for me."

You were wondering what you would have to do to obey him, but then you realized all you would have to do was let his pleasure wash over you-- and now, there was nothing you could do to stop it.

“I-I’m coming, daddy!” you yelped, and all at once that coil of energy snapped inside you.  Your whole body tensed and jolted involuntarily, moans getting louder until it almost sounded like screaming.  You hoped he knew that these were good screams, and you weren’t in pain.

He seemed to, because he kept going, fucking into you harder and rougher.  “Fuck, you like that baby?  You like how I feel inside you?”

“I do,” you nodded quickly, “feels so good…”

You started to feel sort of sleepy and confused, your head heavy from the exhausting pleasure of having just come.  He smiled down at you, admiring your fucked-out expression as you gave in completely to your body’s needs.

“Such a perfect little cunt,” he growled, the filthiness of the word only barely registering in your fuzzy brain.  “You get even wetter when you come, darling, and so fucking tight… god I never wanna stop.”

“Don’t ever stop,” you begged, “you feel good, daddy.”

“Oh, don’t say that,” he warned, “you’re so delicate, you couldn’t take it.  You’ll be begging me to stop by the time I’m done, darling.  Gonna ruin this needy little hole.”

His words made you feel nervous and confused, but oddly aroused.  That coil was tightening again, already.  You wanted more; you weren’t sure you could ever get enough.

“Daddy, I-- I’m gonna come again, if you don’t stop,” you admitted sheepishly, looking down to watch the way his cock disappeared into your body.  You could hear how wet you were each time he thrusted forward, and it was shameful but addictive.

“Look at you,” he purred, “you love it.  You were made for my fuckin’ cock, darling.”

He leaned down and kissed you again, his thrusts changing from fast and reckless to slow but deep.  He pulled back languidly only to slam home harder every time, making you cry out against his lips.

He reached down to hook your legs in his arms, pushing them back until you were bent into a strange position-- when he moved again, his cock brushed against something so deep inside you that you worried there would be none of you left.

You winced and gurgled from the feeling-- it wasn’t quite painful, but it was close to it, along with incredibly intense.  “Oh, daddy,” you gasped.

“You didn’t even know somebody could fuck you like this,” he posited.  “You didn’t even know you could feel this good.”

You nodded breathlessly, your body shaking and shivering underneath him.  This time when you came, it seemed to never end.  He just kept going and you were sure you would stay suspended in this pleasure forever so long as he didn’t stop.

“Fuck, you’re coming, aren’t you?” he growled.

You nodded again.

“I’m close too, darling,” he admitted.  “Beg me to come.  I know you want it inside you.  Ask me nicely.”

“D-daddy,” you moaned, too lost in it to remember how dangerous this was, “I want you to come… I want it inside me…”

“Fuck, I know you do,” he groaned, his head falling back as his thrusts became more erratic.  “Gonna fill up this wet little pussy, gonna claim you with my come-- you’re mine forever, darling.”

“Yours,” you gasped, “all yours, daddy.”

“Fuck!” he cried suddenly, his voice breaking as he pushed as deep into you as possible.  You could feel his cock flexing against your walls, pushing you to your absolute limits, as he came.

You both laid there, nearly frozen still, as your breathing began to slow down a bit.  He moaned when he pulled his softening cock out of you, and took a moment to watch his come leak out of your hole before falling limp beside you.

You blinked to clear your spotty vision; you were sure you were experiencing a pleasure-induced hallucination, or maybe the force of it was just making you see double… because how was your boyfriend in bed with you, and simultaneously standing at the door?

Bucky’s arms wrapped around you slowly, holding you to him, and it was the way the other Bucky weakly called your name that made you know it was the one in bed with you that was the impostor.  He called your name as if he couldn’t believe it was you he was looking at; you understood the feeling.

“Bucky, I--” you started, with no idea what to say.  “What’s going on?”

Bucky’s shock shifted to anger, and you tried to struggle against the arms holding you back but it was fruitless.

“Charles,” Bucky hissed.  “This is… how could you?”

“The difference between you and I,” the voice behind you, just like his, began to explain, “was never money, or random chance.  We had the same opportunities…”

His fingers traced over your thigh and you shuddered.

“...I just knew how to take them.”

“I didn’t know,” you tried to explain, “I thought it was you--”

The other man-- Charles, as Bucky had called him-- clamped a hand over your mouth.

“Your girlfriend’s a bit of a whore, James.  I mean, sort of a tough nut to crack but damn, once you get inside--”

“Shut up,” Bucky seethed.  “Stop talking.”

“You heard her call me ‘daddy’, right?” Charles laughed.

Bucky tightened his jaw, silently answering the question.

“You heard her beg me for more?  Beg me to come inside?” Charles continued.

Bucky stormed across the room, jumping on top of the both of you to wrap his hands around Charles’ neck. 

“Me!” Bucky yelped, “she thought it was me!”

“Still could be,” Charles managed to grumble out through the pressure on his throat.  

Bucky’s face shifted, anger turning to something… else.  Shock, maybe, but it was more than that.  He looked at you, eyes fierce and wild.

His hands relaxed from Charles’ throat, who coughed a little as he caught his breath.

“Do you love me?” Bucky asked you quickly as he moved off of Charles and hovered over you.

“O-of course,” you stammered, tears welling in your eyes.

He leaned back to undo his belt, and Charles laughed.  “Don’t let my come get in the way or anything.”

“I won’t,” Bucky growled before roughly thrusting his cock into you.  Your head fell back but he was already fucking you hard and rough.  His body was the same as Charles’ but he felt completely different.  He fucked you with so much anger and ferocity, and as sick as it made you feel, it felt good, too.

“Bucky,” you gasped, “s-slow down…”

It fell on deaf ears as he grabbed your hips and pulled them up so every thrust was as deep as possible.  You felt like putty in his hands, and you loved it.  Though you didn’t know why, you wanted him to use you.  You wanted him to make you his again, the way you’d been before, erase everything that had happened with you and this… stranger laying beside you.  Who, by the way, was watching the whole ordeal with a raised eyebrow, seemingly more curious than jealous.

Bucky leaned down until his whole body was covering yours, and you wrapped your arms around his wide, muscular back.

“You feel… so good…” he whispered huskily against your ear, and you heard the strain in his voice.  “I can’t last…”

“It’s okay,” you soothed, “I want you to feel good, Bucky; I want you to come.”

“Not until you do,” he said with determination in spite of the way his whole body was shaking, “not until you know that you need me.”

You could only respond with broken moans as he reached down and rubbed your bundle of nerves with his thumb.  He watched the way you cried out and struggled underneath him, the pleasure so intense that your body could barely take it.

“Bucky, please!” you sobbed, not exactly sure what you were asking for, but he kept going, moaning loudly and reaching up to hold onto your headboard even as his own thrusting slammed his knuckles into your wall.

He made a noise that made your heart twist-- something like a whimper and a growl all at once-- and you knew he was coming, but he didn’t stop.  Even when he looked like he was going to hurt himself, even when sweat rolled down his brow and made his hair cling to his face, he didn’t stop.  You came undone all at once, feeling your walls tighten so hard that you were afraid they’d cramp up or something.  Tears burned your eyes from the sheer force of it; your fingers dug into his back through his clothes.

Finally, he let himself slow down to a stop.  You sighed, still feeling little aftershocks reverberate in your body.

“Charles, 2; James, 1,” Charles mumbled to himself as he sat up, patting his twin on the back.  “Good try, though.”

Bucky shoved him off, so hard that he rolled off your bed and onto the floor with a thud.  You wanted to check that he was okay but Bucky grabbed your jaw and kissed you deeply.  When he pulled out, you could feel the rush of warm, sticky come as it left your body.  You felt blissfully disgusting, filthily beautiful.

“Bucky, I didn’t know,” you attempted to explain through your panting breaths, “I never would’ve-- I thought it was you--”

“I know,” he shook his head.  “I know.  It’s okay.”

You could tell that it wasn’t okay.  He was devastated, it was all over his face.  This wasn’t how you wanted any of this to go.  

“Can I ask you something strange?” Bucky requested.

“Of course,” you agreed quickly.

“Where did you get that necklace?”

Charles’ face popped out from across the edge of your bed, painted with a prideful grin.

[creativewritingpracticestudio]

Upcoming Fics That I’m Working On:

If it has a line through it, it’s been completed!

Guns N Roses:

Axl Rose NSFW alphabet

Duff McKagan NSFW alphabet

Slash Hudson NSFW alphabet

Izzy Stradlin x Reader smut fic: He gets turned on when you eat a popsicle in front of him.

Older!Axl Rose x Reader smut fic: You’re his younger girlfriend, and the media is saying a lot of awful things that make Axl feel insecure, so you show him that you love him for who he is, no matter what the paparazzi wants to say about it.

Duff McKagan x Reader smut: size kink.

Slash Hudson x Reader(no smut): You and Slash are a laid back couple, and you accidentally forget about Valentine’s Day, so Axl plans a fancy double date for the two of you, and for him and Stephanie.

Izzy Stradlin x Reader x Axl Rose threesome smut fic: Axl’s been flirting with you and teasing Izzy about possibly stealing you from him for the entirety of the tour, so Izzy fucks you senseless in front of Axl to show him who you belong to(also, Axl joins in towards the end.)

Steven Adler x Reader Hurt/Comfort Smut fic: After Steven finds out that his girlfriend cheated on him with Axl, and that it’s been recorded for a song, he’s hurt. So, he comes to you for comfort.

Izzy Stradlin x Reader Hurt/Comfort and Angry Smut fic: Izzy can usually put up with Axl’s outbursts. But when Axl decided to turn his anger on you, that’s when Izzy’s had enough.

Axl Rose x Reader Hurt/Comfort fic: An argument with Axl turns into him confiding in you about his childhood abuse as you hold him in your arms.

Izzy Stradlin x Reader Smut fic: Stephanie wants Axl to go on a date with her, but the tables for two always take forever, so they decide to make it a double date. How? By setting Izzy up on a blind date with one of Stephanie’s friends, AKA you. Izzy’s less than excited, until he sees how hot you are. Maybe the night won’t be a waste, after all.

Older Axl Rose x Assistant!Reader Smut: You’re Axl’s younger assistant, helping him out backstage. But this day isn’t like most others; Axl’s got a little problem, and it definitely requires your help, but it might be a little above your pay grade. (Hint: the problem requires you to do some work on your knees.)

Older! Slash Hudson x Younger!Reader Smut fic: You’re Richard Fortus’s 20-something niece who he brings with him backstage one night to introduce to his bandmates, including the famous Slash. Unbeknownst to him, you and Slash instantly like each other, and begin dating despite the large age difference. It’s a great relationship; the only issue is making sure Richard doesn’t find out.

Slash x Reader Song fic: Based off the song “Do I Wanna Know” by Artic Monkeys; Slash meets the reader at a bar one night and is instantly taken by her; he begins to come see her there every night, even though he knows that it will probably never go anywhere(or will it? You gotta read to find out!)

Older! Duff McKagan x Reader blurb: watching art restoration videos in bed while eating takeout.

Slash Hudson x Reader angst-fluff fic: During a heated argument, Slash says something to you that he shouldn’t have. You get angry and try to leave, but Slash can’t lose you.

Duff McKagan x Reader fluff fic: You and Duff adopt a pig together!!! :)

Duff McKagan x Reader x Steven Adler Smut fic: You and Duff have been together for a long time now, and he finally works up the courage to ask you-will you have a threesome with him and his best friend, Steven? Obviously, the answer is yes, but how will it go?

Izzy Stradlin x Reader Fluff: You meet Izzy after he becomes sober.

Older! Insecure! Izzy Stradlin x Reader Smut: Izzy’s feeling insecure about his age and the age gap between you and him, so you decide to cheer him up ;)

Duff McKagan x Reader Smut: Duff walls in on you looking at porn magazines, and wants to join in. Stuff goes down.

Current! Axl Rose x Reader Smut: You’re Slash’s daughter, and you’re having a secret relationship with Axl. Slash catches the two of you having sex.

Izzy Stradlin x Reader Smut: You and Izzy are two close friends. You’re tired of being a virgin, and you just want to get the first time having sex over with, so he decides to help you out.

Sub! Steven Adler x Femdom! Reader Smut: A self-indulgent fic of mine where Steven finally agrees to let you dominant him in bed. This was literally just an excuse for me to write Steven being all innocent and flustered and shit, btw. I won’t include pegging in this, but I’m really close to writing a pegging fic. This will have degrading, praising, bondage, and basically just you babying the fuck outta Steven while he acts all innocent and confused.

Sub! Steven x Femdom! Reader Smut: Steven likes sitting in your lap, and you like embarrassing him in front of his bandmates. So, when he’s sitting in your lap at a band practice and gets hard, you naturally decide to have a little bit of fun.

Current! Steven Adler x Younger!Reader Fluff and Smut: You’re a younger, famous singer who Steven falls in love with. He decides not to tell you, out of fear that you couldn’t possibly feel the same way, but he actually couldn’t be more wrong.

Current! Axl Rose x Daughter! Reader Fluff: Axl discovers that he has a long-lost daughter who’s been living in a group home, and decides that he has meet her.

Current! Axl Rose x Reader Smut: As was requested, this is an absolutely dirty fic; spit kink, choking, daddy kink, etc. Axl shows zero mercy, and it’s very sexy.

Mötley Crüe

Tommy Lee x Reader Smut fic: overstimulation kink.

Mick Mars x Reader Smut fic: You write him a love letter before every concert, just to boost his self esteem. This time, however, you’ve got a surprise; the letter isn’t as innocent as usual(basically, you sext him through a letter, and he has to read it in front of his bandmates.)

Oblivious!Tommy Lee x Reader Smut: You’re really horny, but Tommy, being his energetic and slightly ditzy self, doesn’t seem to be getting the hints. Guess you’ll have to show him in a hands-on way.

Mick Mars x Reader Fluff fic: Mick’s back is hurting him, so you give him a nice back massage.

Tommy Lee x Reader Smut fic: You and Tommy are a hedonistic couple with one goal: experience as much pleasure as possible without dying. Your relationship is sex, drugs, and alcohol, and that doesn’t change tonight: the two of you go to a party, get high in a broom closet, and explore each other’s bodies.

Tommy Lee Prompt Fic: “Wow, do you want subtlety to go with that makeup look? Because you don’t have any.”

Nikk Sixx Prompt Fic: “Your stamina is admirable. I wouldn’t be able to fuck ten groupies in a row and then still have the energy to get a hotdog.”

Mick Mars x Reader Smut Fic: You and Mick are taking a ride through town on his motorbike, when you decide to tease him, knowing he can’t do anything about it. Just wait til the two of you get home.

Vince Neil x Reader Sugar Daddy Headcanons

Nikki Sixx x Cheating!Reader Angst: A dark, angsty fic about you cheating on Nikki when he’s at his lowest point.

Tommy Lee x Reader Fluff: You buy Tommy some roses as a joke, but he turns out to love them a lot more than you expected him to.

Hanoi Rocks

Andy McCoy NSFW alphabet

Razzle Dingley x Reader Smut fic: kinky cuddles

Platonic Razzle Dingley x Reader prompt fic: “Your stamina is admirable. I wouldn’t be able to fuck ten groupies in a row and then still have the energy to get a hotdog.”

Nasty Suicide x Male!Reader Smut fic: Just sweet, fluffy smut!

All Members x Reader Smut fic: Literally just a gang-bang fic, not even gonna lie. You have sex with Michael, Razzle, Jan, Andy and Sami at the same time, and it’s basically the best experience of your life.

KISS

Eric Carr NSFW Alphabet

Ace Frehley NSFW Alphabet

Paul Stanley x Reader Headcanons-Headcanons about a gender neutral S/O who’s dealing with depression and can’t feel happy or sad.

Bruce Kulick NSFW Alphabet

Eric Carr x Reader Fluff: A cute fluffy fic about you and Eric having a beach day!

Ace Frehley x Reader Fluff: Just you and Ace cuddling and watching movies.

Marilyn Manson

Marilyn Manson NSFW Alphabet

Older!Marilyn Manson x Reader Smut: Hooking up before a concert.

John 5 x Pinup! Reader Smut: Reader looks like Dita Von Teese, and John sees her before a concert and decides to meet her.

Marilyn Manson x Reader x Ozzy Osbourne Smut fic: Threesome.

Dating Daisy Berkowitz Would Include

Daisy Berkowitz NSFW Alphabet

Dating Marilyn Manson Would Include

Daisy Berkowitz x Reader Smut/Fluff: Just you and Daisy doing couple shit, with a little bit of smut.

Twiggy Ramirez x Reader Angst: A songfic based off of the song Mechanical Animals; You and Twiggy are in a toxic relationship like in the song: he’s empty and unfeeling, you’re always angry and explosive, and the only thing keeping the two of you together is drug addiction.

Slipknot

Young Joey Jordison x Reader fic: No smut, just life on the road.

Iron Maiden

Nicko NSFW Alphabet

Ramones

Joey Ramone NSFW Alphabet

Joey Ramone x Reader Smut: An awkwardly sweet fic about you and Joey being each other’s first times.

Joey Ramone x Reader Smut: Based off of the part of my NSFW Alphabet for Joey, where I mentioned his dirty secrets, which are that he likes to be rough/give orders, and that he likes red lingerie.

Metallica

Lars NSFW Alphabet

Current! James Hetfield x Plus Size!Reader Fluff/Slight Smut: You think that no one can pick you up due to your size, so James proves you wrong.

Johnny Thunders

Dating Johnny Thunders Would Include

Johnny Thunders NSFW Alphabet

Poison

Bret Michaels NSFW Alphabet

Skid Row

Rachel Bolan NSFW Alphabet

Snake NSFW Alphabet

Dating Snake Would Include

Scotti Hill NSFW Alphabet

Rob Affuso NSFW Alphabet

Dating Scotti Hill Would Include

Dating Rob Affuso Would Include

Van Halen

Eddie Van Halen NSFW Alphabet

Ratt

Warren Demartini NSFW Alphabet

The Beatles

The Beatles x Reader Fluff/Smut: The four guys pull a prank on you, but it goes too far and they make you cry. They decide to be sweet to you to make up for it..and by sweet, I mean sweetttttt ;)))

LA Guns

Kelly Nickels NSFW Alphabet

Phil Lewis NSFW Alphabet

Kelly Nickels x Reader Smut: Just some nice smut between you and Kelly!

Machine Gun Kelly + His Band

JP Cappelletty/Rook NSFW Alphabet

Nine Inch Nails/Trent Reznor

Trent Reznor NSFW Alphabet

Dating Trent Reznor Would Include

Type O Negative

Peter Steele NSFW Alphabet

Def Leppard

Steve Clark NSFW Alphabet

Aerosmith

Joe Perry NSFW Alphabet

Rammstein

Till x British! Reader x Richard Smut: A threesome between Till, Richard and the reader; they really, really like your accent.

[neganisking]

Sometimes bad things happen

A/N: Here it is! It’s taken a couple of months but the sequel for surprise gift is here! You could probably read this as a stand alone fic but there are a few references that might not ake sense. MASSIVE thank you to everyone who has left me comments likes and reblogs, you all fuel my motivation and I was completely blown away by the respose to the first part of this series. Special thanks to @noodlecupcakes @fatbutstillrad @i-am-negan-trash and @andillica who have either beta’d parts of this fic away and/or listened to me whine about it now and this now and then too.

Read surprise gift here! - Masterlist

Wordcount:9,500

Tags/ warnings: D/s , light smut, nudity, sexual content, hurt/comfort, fluff, canon typical graohic descriptions of violence and gore, injury, minor character death, blood, walkers, panic attack, praise kink, service kink, cuddles, hair stroking I’m being a bit generous with the tags but if I miss anything let me know.

—————-

“Open the fucking gate!”

The horn of the truck blares out into the air as the Saviors on guard duty rush to pull back the metal chain link fence. Your ears are still ringing with the screams of the man slumped on the floor in front of you that had now, to your horror, fallen into faint whimpers. He wasn’t going to last much longer.

The sweat was pouring from your brow, your breath coming out in harsh rags. Using what energy you had left, you clamp your hands down on the bloodied stump, using your own bodyweight to try and stem the flow of blood. God there was so much blood.

You hear Travis holler out the window. His tone sharp and irritated. “Get Carson to haul ass down here proto! Jimmy got bit.”

Your stomach lurches as the man stops whimpering, his eyes rolling back into his head. Cussing loudly you grab his shoulders and shake him hard, anything to get him to come to. It doesn’t work.

Your voice touches on hysteria as you call through the metal sheet to the front cab. “Travis I can’t keep him awake! Jim! Jim c’mon buddy wake up! We’re here now. C’mon!”

It wasn’t fair. He had gone through all that shit just to die when you finally get him back? No. He was strong. He would make it. You just had to keep him going long enough for Carson to get him.

Alderman’s voice answers, sounding just as panicked as yours does. “James motherfucking Bates if you don’t wake up right now I’ll get Negan to put your ass on the fence so help me-“

Travis interrupts his empty threat. “-Fucking drive up to the door already he’s running out of time.”

“I’m going! Move out of the fucking way!” A few more blasts of the horn later and the truck lurches forward before finally grinding to a halt. You were home.

Your body ached in relief, trembling from the exertion of the last few long hours. “Jim c’mon we made it. Don’t go giving up on me now.”

The slamming of the truck door and the muffled voices tell you that the two men are making their way around to the back with some of the others. Good. You were about to fall on your ass from exhaustion.

“Carson’s on his way.”

“He’d better fucking hustle or it’ll be too late. Someone call Negan. He’ll want to know about this shit show.”

Your body sags at the mention of Negan’s name. He’ll set things right. It would all be okay. You adjust your position slightly muscles begging for a break from your crouched stance beside him. It was almost over.

A breathy groan erupts from the man. Still pushing down on his wound you flick your eyes to his face to see if he had managed to regain consciousness only to see his eyes taking on a haunting yellow glaze, drowning out the blue that had once been there. He was gone. “Aw shit!”

As you spur yourself into action, Jim’s lifeless body lurches forward, snarling as it spots it’s first meal. It stumbles, missing you as you reel back out of the way and clumsily shuffles towards you with a sickening snarl.

You could end it. It wouldn’t take much more effort to take your knife and halt the remnants of your friend forever. It would almost be a kindness really, no one wanted to end up like that after all. The reality of it, however, was that that kindness wasn’t an option – especially on the doorstep of the sanctuary. There weren’t many things that were wasted in the new order and the wall outside the factory needed new corpses to replace those that had become rotten beyond recognition. Jim still had a purpose. Even in death he belonged to Negan.

Rapidly crossing the suddenly far too small space of the truck bed, you hammer desperately against the door. “He’s turned! Open the fucking door!”

In an instant the bolt holding the doors locked slides open and daylight streams into the space. Throwing yourself out of the truck, you quickly slam the doors shut behind you as your two companions can only look on in shock horror.

You slide the bolt across just in time as the walker throws himself against the metal, the force of the impact making your slick hands slip against the door leaving a trail of crimson in their wake.

Alderman balls his fists into his hair, turning from the truck with gritted teeth. “Oh fuck. Fucking fuck. No Jim! C’mon man!”

Travis swears loudly, kicking the truck door making the walker inside ram the opening again. You glare at your friend, blood still pounding in your ears as you struggle to hold the door closed. The world around you began to tilt as you became dizzy. When would today end? “A little help?”

Weary from exhaustion himself, Travis takes his place beside you, leaning against the truck door while snapping at the few saviours who were just standing there watching everything go down. “Could you assholes make yourself useful and take it to the fence before anyone else gets fucking bit? We’re fucking done today.”

As the saviours come to life, Travis takes you over to the side and sits you down on one of the large stone barriers. Gulping in lungfuls of air that isn’t suffocated with the stench of blood and death, you try to relax your body. Sparing Travis a look you wonder if he’s alright. He looks worried for some reason. Before you have the chance to ask he beats you to it. “You okay?”

Were you? You were still alive obviously so that was a plus. Better than Jim at least. You felt like you were about to throw up whatever was left in your stomach but that wasn’t exactly surprising. Now that the immediate danger was gone and there was no one to try to save, things were catching up to you rather quickly.

Carson’s arrival saves you from having to answer. He runs through the door, his large medical bag in hand, looking rightfully flustered as his eyes lock onto you. “Who was bitten?”

Travis sighs, easing to his feet with a little difficulty. “It’s too late doc. It was a long shot anyway, we cut his arm off but he bled out in the truck on the way back.”

The doctor frowned, looking genuinely distraught. He was a good man, or at least he was from what you had seen of him. “Is anyone else hurt?”

Sparing a glance behind him to where you were sitting and another to where Alderman was pacing on his own in an empty corner of the lot, he rubbed the back of his neck. You cast your eyes to the floor, the blood on your skin and covering your clothes doing nothing to help your nausea. “Yeah, nothing life threatening though I just think-“

You don’t find out what Travis thinks because in that moment the main fire door opens with such force that it hits the outside wall with a resounding bang. Heavy footsteps approached you as the familiar voice that belonged to them demanded attention. “What in the ever loving fuck happened?”

“Negan.” At the sound of Travis’ voice you squint up at the men in front of you from your place on the stone bench, blinking slowly. Travis had nervously fixed his posture to stand upright and the doctor still had that same look of concern etched into his features.

Unsatisfied with his answer, Negan narrowed his eyes, sparing a beat to frown in your direction. “I repeat. What in the ever loving fuck happened?”

Travis adopted a professional tone, speaking as quickly and matter-of-factly as possible. It was the best way to deal with Negan when he was pissed. “Pretty sure it was the Wolves. We were checking out sector 7 again and we must have set off one of their old traps. It was bad. Jimmy got bit. We cut off his arm and tried to get him back to the doc but he didn’t make it.”

You supress a shudder, remembering the way the rotters poured in from every exit, the way your stomach had dropped through the floor, how hopeless you felt. It was a miracle you made it out alive. Jim of course, hadn’t been so lucky.

Negan growled. “I thought we fucking cleared those shit eating psychos out last month.”

Travis sighed. He shrugged as he tried to work it out for himself. “As far as I can tell we did sir. It was just an active trap. None of them came to check it after the alarm went off. It took us long enough to get out, they would have been there.

“Motherfuckers.” The venom in Negan’s voice is palatable and for good reason. The vigilante group had picked off a serious amount of saviours until you had all went out together to hunt them all down. Even now after they were long gone they were still managing to cause shit. You couldn’t help but share Negan’s sentiment.

For a long moment, Negan looks about ready to take Lucile to some poor asshole’s melon out of sheer frustration. No one says anything, you and Travis being too exhausted to offer any kind of support and Carson, who most likely didn’t have a clue, opting for the safety of silence instead. A couple of long moments later, Negan runs a gloved hand down his face with a sigh. “Anyone else hurt?”

Travis shrugs, having given up on hiding just how tired he was. “Nothing serious.”

Negan nods to himself. “Good. Check ‘em all out anyway Carson. Y’all look like shit.”

You hear the dismissal in his tone and you imagine him strutting away back to whatever he had been doing. It had been a few weeks since your encounter with him in the privacy of your room and true to his word he hadn’t held it over you. In fact, he hadn’t mentioned it at all. You had mixed feelings on the matter really, though right now you were in no state to examine them.

You wonder how long it would take to get to bed. You supposed you would need to clean yourself up before Carson could check you over. And the man was thorough so it would probably take a while. Shit. Maybe you could just nap for a bit first.

Suddenly you become aware of someone snapping their fingers in front of your face. Furrowing your brow you blink at the hand, the realisation slowly dawning on you that it belongs to Negan. Didn’t he leave?

You squint at the man who seems to have been saying something if his perplexed expression is anything to go by. “What?”

Negan huffs, no trace of amusement in his unreadable face. “I said are you fucking hurt?”

You frown slightly, trying to catalogue anything that could be considered and injury. Mostly you were just tired. “I – I don’t think so.”

“So this shit isn’t your blood?” He clarifies, gesturing to the sticky mess that was beginning to harden pretty much everywhere on your body making you want to itch.

“No.” You grumble flippantly, completely exhausted. Didn’t not being hurt give that away already? Negan was a smart guy he could figure it out.

Negan purses his lips together, a stern look on his face. You wonder what his problem is, just wanting to be alone. Apparently Negan doesn’t get the hint as in one swooping motion, he takes you by the crook of your arm and hoists you to your feet, leaving no room for argument. “Right. C’mon.”

It’s mostly out of surprise that you let yourself be pulled along the corridors and up the stairwells. His grip was firm but it wouldn’t be difficult to get out of it, you just didn’t have enough fight in you to make a fuss. Besides, Negan usually got what he wanted anyway. The sooner he did what he wanted the sooner you could sleep.

Along the way people dropped to their knees as they caught sight of the tall man. Seeing it from his perspective made it seem even more bizarre. Like he was some kind of god, parting the ocean or some shit like that.

It’s then that you realise where he’s leading you to. Slowing your pace you pull gently at the hand wrapped around your wrist. You didn’t want to go up to his room, you just wanted to sleep. “Negan-“

Negan looks at you with an almost pained expression. “Don’t fight me on this doll face. Just don’t.”

When the only reply he gets is a withering sigh, Negan continues onward, not stopping even after he leads you through the doorway to his room going instead straight to the bathroom.

As bathrooms go, the room was hardly the dream that they used to sell you in commercials or in fancy catalogues with payment plans and polished marble surfaces. That being said, the fact that the man had a working bathroom at all was a luxury that was almost unheard of in this day and age. The small, clean room had probably once only been equipped with a toilet and a sink but now it had a mismatched bath with an overhead shower too, the yellow duck patterned shower curtain drawing your amusement as it catches your eye.

Flipping the lid of the toilet seat down he finally lets go of your wrist, your skin feeling noticeably colder as his hand leaves you. He inclines his head to the porcelain. “Take a seat.”

Not needing to be told twice you sit down, all too aware that you’re most likely getting blood on everything but you can’t bring yourself to care. It wasn’t like Negan was particularly squeamish anyway.

Running a basin full of water Negan shrugs his jacket off, hanging it on the hook on the back of the door. It crosses your mind that maybe you ought to do something, say something even but you have no idea what. Instead you just watch him move about in the space, your face slack and weary as he dampens a cloth with the water.

Turning to you, Negan picks your hand up from your lap and begins to wipe your arm down. He frowns at the offending limb in concentration, something clearly working it’s way through his mind. “Is what Travis said true? Is that what happened?”

You blink slowly, trying to remember exactly what Travis had said. Negan wrings the cloth out in the basin and has almost completely cleaned your arm by the time you reply. His answer had been vague, but unfortunately it was all true. “Yeah.”

Negan grunts in reply, he doesn’t say anything else which is more than okay with you. Methodically, he moves onto your other arm, rinsing the cloth out again and again until it’s clean. At some point in the process, his movements begin to soothe your frazzled nerves, it would feel almost comforting if it wasn’t for how overwhelmed you were.

Once your arms are done he pauses, taking in your face with a grimace. Rude. You didn’t look that bad. Besides if he was so offended by your face then why had he been trying so hard to get into your pants all this time?

He rinses out the cloth once again before squatting down in front of you. Wetting his lips, Negan presses the material to your face and you hiss at the uncomfortable feeling, the cold water irritating you much more than before. Negan pulls the corner of his mouth down in the closest thing you’ve ever seen to an apology from the man and for a moment your irritable mood subsides. He is trying to help after all.

That is until he opens his mouth. “Think you can manage a shower?”

Your eyes roll as you huff in exasperation. You had just been through hell and lived to tell the tale, a mere shower in comparison was a walk in the park. Unable to keep the annoyance from your voice you grumble, too wired to give a damn. “I think I’m capable of taking a fucking shower Negan. Honestly you don’t need to make such a fuss.”

Negan presses his lips into a thin line, his antagonised persona darkening the already strange atmosphere in the small room. “Yeah well seeing as you rolled up here covered in fucking blood and shaking so fucking bad it looked like you were going to go join old Jimbo on the motherfucking fence I’ve decided that I’m more than entitled to give a shit if you can make it through a good damn shower without keeling over. Thank you very fucking much.”

You’re taken aback by his biting tone, not used to your words having that affect on the man. Usually he bounced off your bickering and griping with a gleeful smile and a sarcastic remark. You hadn’t really given much thought to how you must have looked to other people. It explained why Travis had looked to worried too. The last thing you wanted to do was to get into an argument so in the hope it would diffuse the situation you decide to back down. “Sorry.”

Negan shakes his head, exasperated. “Don’t be sorry just quit busting my god damn balls. You’re in shock. You can’t even fucking tell that you’ve got a fucking gash on the side of your god damn face.”

“What?” You squawk indignantly, not entirely sure he isn’t fucking with you as you quickly stand up and turn to the mirror on the wall. Ignoring how the sudden movement makes your head spin you squint to examine your apparent injury.

Most of your face is clean now, with the odd bit of blood in the creases of your nose and your eyebrows. What catches most of your attention however is the long graze around your left temple that was still steadily oozing a small amount of blood. It looked worse than it probably was, and you were almost certain it wasn’t serious but the fact that you hadn’t even realised made your chest tighten. You couldn’t even remember banging your head but then given how chaotic it had all been it was hardly surprising. What else had you missed? No wonder Negan was concerned.

Noting the way your face falls and your breathing picks up, Negan moves to stand behind you so you can see his face in the mirror. He gently rests his hand on your shoulder his voice a little strained but much more comforting. “Exactly my fucking point. Take a deep breath for me now. Nice and slow.”

Taking in a shaky breath you fill your lungs with air before turning around to face the man behind you and leaning back against the counter, not wanting to look at your face anymore. Now that you were aware of your injury it suddenly comes to life, making your head throb painfully.

Negan slips one hand around your waist this time to steady you, watching you closely in concern. “Easy does it butternut.”

For a few long moment you just focus on breathing. Your eyes close and you try to relax your body, letting Negan’s close proximity make you feel safer than you had all day – not that that was difficult. Relaxing doesn’t exactly work, you’re too tired, too sore and your mind just won’t stop reeling with white noise. You suppose at least you’re not alone.

When you open your eyes you meet Negan’s soft gaze. You quirk your lip in acknowledgement trying to reassure him somehow. He doesn’t wait for you to speak gesturing instead to your stained clothes. “Can I help you out of these? No funny business I swear.”

You huff a laugh, finding it amusing that Negan was so bold and so ridiculous to try and get your clothes off. Your initial thought was that no, you were capable of dealing with the rest yourself and that you were in no mood to allow yourself to be naked in front of him. The more you thought about it though the more you realised that it wouldn’t be anything he hadn’t already seen. You doubted that he would try anything while you were in a state anyway. Between that and how heavy your limbs feel a little help didn’t seem like such a bad idea but you didn’t want to make it that easy for him.

With a sly quirk of your eyebrow you ask him. “Scouts honour?”

He blinks, not expecting you to be making a joke in this particular situation and scrunches his face in amusement before falling into right into your trap. “Scouts honour.”

Narrowing your eyes in mock scrutiny, you wag a finger in his direction, recalling a previous conversation. “I thought we already established that you weren’t a boy scout.”

Apparently your joke falls flat although you still think it’s pretty funny. Negan blinks a couple of times before pinching the bridge of his nose as though he’s the one with a hole in the side of his head. “Fucking – honestly butternut. You’re killing me here. Would you just me help you already?”

Rolling your eyes you concede to him and gesture for him to do his thing. With a nod Negan’s hand leaves your side and his fingers find the hem of your tank top. To your surprise, Negan systematically strips you of your clothes without a single remark and even without the faintest trace of a suggestive taunt on his face. He’s all business, not even letting his eyes linger as he unclips your bra and your bare skin meets the cool air. You can’t help but feel out of sorts with how uncharacteristic Negan is acting. If you’re honest you’re not sure how to handle him when he isn’t being crude.

It’s after you toe off your boots and you unbutton your jeans that you decide to break the silence. As Negan stoops down, fingers hooking into the belt loops to ease the fabric down your legs you tease him lightly. “This wasn’t exactly how I envisioned you getting my clothes off again.”

It does the trick. With a low chuckle Negan grins, looking up from his crouched position at your feet with a gleam in his eyes that starts a certain kind of churning in your stomach. This you were familiar with. It must show somehow because Negan let’s out a satisfied hum and reaches to pull your panties down so you can step out of both at the same time.

Stark naked now you’re all too aware of just how exposed you are and just how close his face is to your nether region. In different circumstances you would be more than willing to push those invisible boundaries to see what might happen but you knew yourself well enough to know it wasn’t a good idea right now. He did look positively sinful though. Unable to help yourself you press your thighs together and of course Negan notices.

With a sigh, Negan gathers up your dirty clothes and eases to his feet smiling softly. “There’s always next time sugar. It’s nice to know you’ve been thinking about it though.”

His added afterthought makes you frown. You thought it would be obvious that he had been on your mind especially after the display you had made of yourself for him. It was hard not to think of it all really. You weren’t about to tell him anytime soon but nothing you had done to yourself since had felt half as good as the day he had watched you unravel and beg for him. “Of course I have.”

Negan scoffs bitterly. Turning from you to dump the clothes in the hamper. “Could’ve fooled me.”

The beginnings of what could have been a good mood instantly vanish as a scowl takes over your features. What the fuck did he expect? You were pretty sure you had made it clear you weren’t about to compromise your place amongst the saviours for him. That should have spelled out to him that public declarations vying for his attention not to mention his dick were off the table. Did the fact that you had already gone as far as you had with him – the fact that you were currently standing in front of the man butt fucking naked for crying out loud – mean nothing?

Narrowing your eyes, a flare of anger comes over you. Without even considering the consequences you open your mouth with a scathing tone. “Oh I’m so very sorry Negan. I’ll remember to swoon and faint every time you walk into the god damn room from now on – make it real fucking easy for you to tell.”

Negan’s nostrils flare, not one for being spoken to like that. It sometimes amused you how he could always give it out but whenever it came to taking it he spat out his dummy. Today however, you didn’t give a shit. He was out of line and you didn’t have enough fucks left to give to cater to his ego – and you weren’t done yet either.

Looking him square in the eye you launch into another tirade. “I get that you’re so used to having multiple women waiting on your beck and call who you can fuck or do whatever the fuck you want with so maybe you didn’t manage to catch on but what happened the other week was a pretty big fucking deal for me. So don’t go acting all butt hurt just because I’m not fucking grovelling for your attention. You’ve already had a metric fuck ton of mine.”

So much for not getting into an argument. The silence surrounding you both in the aftermath of your outburst feels deafening and you struggle to hold your composure feeling far to vulnerable and strung out to stay still.

A different kind of fear begins to trickle through your mind as you process exactly what you just said and exactly who you just said it to. Without a doubt you meant every word but Negan commanded a certain amount of respect and you couldn’t say for sure exactly where your boundary was. He wouldn’t hurt you, you knew that for a fact but it didn’t stop you from worrying that maybe you had gone too far this time. Your horrid mood wasn’t completely his fault after all.

Negan breaks the silence with a huff, shaking his head as he narrows his gaze on you. “Don’t be a bitch for fuck’s sake. It doesn’t fucking suit you.”

At his anti climatic reaction, you mirror his expression. You’re not sure exactly what he’s playing at but you really can’t muster up the mental capacity to deal to his mood swings too - your own were difficult enough. “I’m not in the mood for games Negan.”

Negan considers you for a moment before deciding on a reply, pressing his lips together in frustration. “What the fuck happened out there huh?”

The question hangs in the air and as soon as you open your mouth to tell him exactly what happened you close it again. The words vanish from your mind as the white noise of fear, death and blood distract your train of thought. There were so many of them. It was so loud. So much blood.

“Stay here.”

You register Negan leaving the room, the door still slightly ajar and you find yourself immediately wishing he hadn’t left. Was he mad? Was he coming back? He wouldn’t have just left you to stay in his bathroom that was for sure so you reason that he can’t be that mad. Jesus you need to get a grip.

You manage to compose yourself in the short amount of time it takes Negan to return. Without a word he all but thrusts a pile of fabric into your hands, scowling. Oh that’s right. You were mad at him.

“Take a fucking shower. Whatever you do don’t pass out. Yell if you need me I’ll just be outside.” He doesn’t wait for you to reply turning on his heel and marching out of the small room. The door slams shut behind him and you can’t help but think how absolutely ridiculous he’s being.

‘I’ll manage.” You grumble out loud, out of spite more than anything.

Looking down at the fabric in your hand you realise Negan had given you a change of clothes to wear. For a sickening moment you think he’s completely lost it and left you a set of old prisoner’s clothes but on closer inspection you realise that these clothes belong to Negan himself.

You’ve never seen him dressed in anything other than his signature jeans, t-shirt and leather jacket combination but with the soft grey sweatpants in your hand you can’t help but imagine some scenario of him indulging in comfort on a rainy day. It’s ridiculous you know but it diffuses the anger that had been steadily building in your stomach and you realise that maybe that isn’t the only thing that is ridiculous about the whole thing.

Stepping into the tub, you draw the duck patterned curtain around you and begin to systematically scrub every ounce of blood and grime from your body, helping yourself to Negan’s shampoo as you go. You supposed that letting your mind go blank would be the hardest thing to do after today but focusing on the trivial tasks at hand allows you to do exactly that. By the time you step out onto the cool floor and reach for the towel on the counter, you feel lighter in more ways than one.

You ignore the way your head throbs as you quickly towel dry your skin before pulling the sweatpants over your legs and pulling the drawstring until it rests comfortably around your waist. It’s a little long in the leg so you easily roll the cuffs up, deciding that you need to catch Negan wearing these at some point in the future, for science. Forgoing your bra, because honestly if it wasn’t one of the last in your size you would gladly burn it rather than try to clean it, you pull his black t-shirt over your head and start to towel dry your hair, psyching yourself up to face the man waiting for you behind the door.

You were hoping that he wasn’t still mad at you. Quite frankly you were more than ready to sleep the rest of the week away if you could get away with it. Another argument was the last thing you wanted to get into. Besides, even though he was an asshole about it, he still seemed to have been genuinely worried.

The last of the adrenaline seemed to have washed away in the shower, leaving you feeling empty and heavy. With another sigh, you pull open the door and hesitantly make your way through the threshold.

Having probably heard the door open, you find Negan standing by his desk watching you carefully. It was practically impossible to decipher his mood from that alone so you decide to offer an olive branch and be the bigger person. “I’m sorry for snapping. But it- I was just-“

Your explanation gets stuck in your mouth, words failing you as you try to express exactly how you feel. Cutting you off with a firm tone, much softer than before, he gestures to the chair beside him. “Come over here.”

Unable to help feeling like a chastised child, you nervously pad your way over the rug on the floor to him. Eventually meeting his gaze he gently takes your elbow and guides you to sit in the leather chair. Hopefully you could sleep soon.

Watching him in silence, you look on as Negan opens a small wooden box to reveal some kind of first aid kit. He breaks the silence as he takes out cotton swabs and another couple of bits. “Travis said you were the one who lobbed off Jim’s arm.”

For a moment you just blink at the man. How did he know that? You were absolutely certain that Travis hadn’t mentioned it earlier. Unless it was when you were in the shower? How long were you in there for?

Your eyes land on the radio sitting on the desk beside you and suddenly it all makes sense. There’s no sense in denying it and clearly you weren’t allowed to ignore it so instead you reply in a cautious huff of breath. “Yeah.”

“You did the right thing.” He states it so matter-of-factly that he might has well have been passing comment on the weather rather than the fact that a man died. He gently dabs some antiseptic concoction on your cut and you forget to supress the hiss of pain that follows. He carries on regardless determined to clean out your cut.

“But he died.” It wasn’t so obvious to you. If you hadn’t have cut his arm off then he would still be alive. Not for long sure but at least he would have gotten to spend his last moments doing something other than screaming in agony.

Negan shrugs, sizing up a couple if different band aids before deciding on one to use. “He would have died anyway.”

You shake your head lightly unconvinced. It wasn’t the point. He didn’t get it.

Negan sighs, having finished whatever he had been doing to your head and cleans up the used and discarded bits from the table before putting the box away. Maybe he senses it’s a lost cause but he draws himself up and changes the subject. “I need to go over some paperwork. You, are gonna sit right here.”

Taking you gently by the elbow he firmly guides you up out of the chair and swaps sides with you before inclining to the spot on the floor. It takes you a moment to realise that you did in fact hear him correctly before squawking indignantly. “What? I’m not sitting at your feet like a dog Negan.”

As though expecting your reaction, an amused smirk pulls at his lip, his eyebrow raised in a challenge. “Oh I’m sorry. Do you have somewhere else you’d rather fucking be?”

You gape at him for a moment. Yes was your immediate spiteful answer. You would much rather be in bed asleep. Sleeping felt like such a good idea but you couldn’t quite bring yourself to voice it. His unusual request had piqued your curiosity and if you were honest you didn’t really want to leave just yet. Something about his presence comforted you and given he wasn’t mad at you anymore you felt reluctant to rob yourself it just to prove a point.

Negan scoffs, taking your stunned silence as an answer. “Thought not. Now sit Fido.”

“Woof.” You pout, taking a seat on the threadbare rug beside the drawers of the desk, ignoring the way that being put in this position at his feet sends a certain shiver of excitement through you. You’d come back to that later.

Making himself comfortable in the chair beside you Negan barks a laugh. “Very fucking funny.”

You wait, watching Negan as he pulls a pair of glasses out of the drawer by your head and true to his word starts going through what looks like the outpost reports. The gently flicking of paper is the only noise in the room for a few long moments and while it isn’t an uncomfortable silence, you still feel the need to ask. “Why am I sitting on the floor?”

Negan pauses, pulling the glasses off his face and setting them down on the desk. He regards you for a moment, something softening in his expression before reaching out to take the tip of your chin in his fingers, stroking his thumb along your jaw gently. “Because princess you need a time out.”

Brows furrowing, you squint up at the man despite the way his touch warms you. It didn’t make any sense. “I thought you said I did the right thing?”

Negan smiles, it doesn’t quite reach his eyes and you wonder if it’s sadness or pity you see in his expression. “You did. Now shush.” He adds as an afterthought, returning back to his task.

His confirmation only managed to confuse you even more. If you did the right thing then – was this a punishment? Why would it be if you didn’t do anything wrong? God you were tired. You wondered if you could nap on the floor. Sure Negan would probably be telling dog jokes for the rest of the month at least but at this point you didn’t give a shit. You were so strung out that it wasn’t difficult for you to consider resting your head against Negan’s leg instead. It was right there after all and touching him felt so comforting before. Would he mind? Maybe you could doze off too.

You don’t worry yourself for long, taking the initiative you shuffle slightly over and gently wind your arm around his calf, hugging it before slowly slumping against his leg, resting your cheek against the top of his knee. For a moment as Negan stills, you wonder if maybe he didn’t want you to but as he drops a hand down and gently scratches against your scalp you let out a soft sigh of relief.

Half lidded, your gaze wanders along the patterns of the rug beneath you and along the creases and folds of his sweatpants. In your boredom you focus on your own breathing and slowly start to relax, forcing your muscles to unlock one by one as you slump further into his leg.

That is until you see it.

It’s only blood. You’ve spent more time covered in blood than you have clean at this point but the small amount under the corner of your nail, somehow missed by both you and Negan reminds you of exactly why you’re here - exactly who’s blood it is.

The sound of the shutter blocking your only exit was secondary to the snarl of a small army of roamers that seemed to pour in from the cracks in the walls. You’re still not entirely sure how you managed to escape, killing rotter after rotter seemed endless until you found yourself being dragged towards the fresh air.

It almost didn’t end the way it did. A few more yards and it would have been a different story, but the walker that lunged for you at the last second had other plans. There wasn’t many times in the past few years that you had genuinely thought you were going to die but today was most certainly one of them.

It would have been, if it hadn’t been for Jim. Knocking you out of harms way just in time left no time for the man to save himself. He yelped as the monster tried to knock him down, kicking it away before swiftly stabbing it in the head but the damage had been done. It was only after you had put enough distance between you and the dead that he revealed exactly what had happened.

You hardly had to deliberate it. He saved your life so you had to save his.

Cutting someone’s arm off was nothing like they had made it look in the horror movies. There were no clean cuts or smooth follow through. Bringing your machete down against his arm hardly made a dent in the scheme of it all. You had wanted to stop then, to run and cry and beg him for forgiveness but your decision had been made and you forced yourself to carry on.

You knew you would never forget the look of sickening horror on their faces, the blood curdling scream that erupted from Jim as you hacked away at his arm. Over and over. God it never seemed to end. There was so much blood.

Maybe it was a bad call.

Maybe Carson could have done something else.

You should have probably used a belt. Or asked the guy first at least. Something.

Anything.

Maybe he would still be alive.

“It’s okay honey.”

His voice brings you out of your own thoughts and you’re surprised to find your breath catching in your throat and hot tears tracking down your face. God it was so fucked up. It wasn’t for the first time but you wished the world could go back to the way it was where you could just worry about getting the rent paid on time instead of getting mixed up in the ethics of cutting someone’s arm off.

You hastily unwind yourself from Negan’s leg to scrub the tears away from your face, trying to suck in a breath to steady yourself with. You needed to get a grip.

Smoothing his hand over your shoulder blade he gently coaxes you up into his arms. “C’mere kitten.”

This wasn’t how you wanted the next time you sat in his lap to go either but you’d be damned if you weren’t going to take the support he was so willingly offering you. Slipping up onto his lap he gently rearranges your legs as you bury your face against the crook of his neck, ignoring an irritated throb from the graze on your head.

A deep breath. Then another. You needed to calm down. He smelled good. How did he always manage to smell good? You focused on it to try and distract your own mind and chase away the crushing guilt.

Negan however had a different idea. Pulling you closer against him he methodically began to rub the lines of your back with a smooth palm. “Just let go darlin’ I got you.”

Like a damn breaking inside of you an uncontrollable surge of grief overwhelmed your mind and with Negan holding the pieces of you together you sobbed against him.

It wasn’t fair. It really wasn’t.

God you were so afraid.

He died saving your life.

Your friend was dead because of you and maybe you could have stopped it from happening.

You cling to him, mortified somewhere in the back of your mind at the state you’re in but the need for the comfort and safety that was Negan outweighed it all. If he was at all bothered by it he didn’t show it in the slightest. He keeps a tight hold on you, stroking along your back as he lightly rocks you back and forth, letting you get everything out. It’s cathartic in a way.

He stays like that with you for as long as it takes your crying to subside and the tremor in your frame to ease. Pulling in steadying breaths you start to calm down and come back to reality. It strikes you as odd just how much you needed that just as it dawns on you that Negan knew you needed it too. No one had ever done anything like that for you before and it makes you swell with admiration for the man. He really did care.

Pushing away from him lightly you lean back grimacing at the wet patch on his shirt but you know he doesn’t care about that given the soft smile on his face. You’re not sure how to let him know that you know he knew and that you’re grateful – even thinking it is confusing enough after all but in the end you decide to lighten the mood a little.

With a light huff and a small grin, you tease him. “Now I’m a cat? C’mon dude. Make up your mind.”

His face splitting into a wide smile, Negan ruffles your hair playfully. “Always such a smart ass.”

You sniff, still recovering but manage to scrunch your nose at him in good humour. “You love it when I sass you.”

“Indeed I fucking do butternut.” His voice drops to something more intimate and as he swipes his thumbs underneath your eyes you can’t help but lean into his touch.

Both of you revel in the quiet moment until Negan draws a breath clearly having something to say. “You listening?”

He waits until you nod before beginning, his tone making you avoid interrupting. “You did the right thing. Sure it sucks that he fucking died. But you gave him a chance. A good one. It isn’t your fault alright? There’s a million maybes and what if’s but the fact is you did something that could have saved his life instead of waiting around for him to keel over anyway. He would be fucking grateful. And shit, now that I know there are still active traps out there I can make sure we’re more fucking careful so this shit doesn’t happen again. You want to blame someone for this today you blame those dead fucking mongrels who set the traps in the first place. Not yourself. You did the right thing.”

You listen with furrowed brow, turning yourself to rest your head against his chest. Negan’s arms circle around you again and with a shuddering sigh you let his words sink in. It just wasn’t fair.

“It was just awful.” You decide to say, hearing the slight waver in your voice. Awful was an understatement.

“You’re safe now alright? It’s okay butternut.”

Fighting against your own stubborn pride, you let him make you feel safe and warm inside. It wasn’t okay really but what else could you do about it? You couldn’t bring him back now. At least you had tried right? For a long while you just sink into his warm embrace but eventually you feel yourself start to droop and you know it’s time to go.

Sitting up again Negan’s hands fall to your hips. The words get stuck in your mouth again but you power through your nerves anyway. “Thank you. For helping me. I mean – I could have dealt with this on my own – you didn’t have to – y’know – but thanks.”

Huffing a laugh, Negan raises a sceptical eyebrow at you. “You think I don’t know that I didn’t have to? Honey I didn’t bring you up here because I didn’t think you could cope without me or some shit. You’re a motherfucking badass – I know that better than anyone. You don’t need me. Hell, most of the time I don’t think you even want me.”

You could tell by the way his voice drops to a low mumble that he didn’t really mean to say that last part. He pauses frowning at something before continuing, guarded, almost nervous.

“I did it because I wanted to fucking help you. I did it because I didn’t want you to have to deal with it alone. I did it because all anyone fucking told me was that some fucker got bit and the first thing I see is you fucking drenched in blood and I fucking thought – I though I was going to fucking lose you.”

He reaches up to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear and before he can pull away you gently catch his wrist holding him in place and lean intro his touch. If he really did mean that, and you couldn’t fathom a reason why he would have said it otherwise, then it would explain why he was being so stubborn and persistent. It explained a lot actually. You realise it was no small thing for him to tell you that either, hopefully conveying the sentiment of how much you appreciate it in your expression.

He smiles, stroking his thumb over your cheek. “I also did it because you were acting like such a stubborn bitch when I know how much of a good girl you can be for me.”

Just like that the mood shifts again to something a lot less innocent. If you weren’t so tired you would totally try something. You wanted this man. An undercurrent of lust washes over you and you find yourself wishing the circumstances were different. Maybe next time.

Stroking your thumb over the bare skin of his wrist you try again to make amends for earlier. “I’m sorry for snapping at you.”

Negan nods. “I know you are it’s okay princess. As it happens you were right about a couple of things though.”

You sit a little straighter then out of curiosity. “Oh?”

He drops his hand and draws in a breath to explain. “I owe you an apology too doll. It would seem that I’ve made some pretty fucking big assumptions about you and – well it isn’t fair. I want you to know that I’m man enough to know when I fuck up. So I’m sorry.”

He’s talking of course about that offhanded comment that got you so riled up. You had thought that maybe you had overreacted but there was a lot of truth to his words. He had asked you to be a wife at one point, it makes sense to you that he expected you to behave a certain way. Not that that was your problem really. In fact, if it wasn’t for your rapidly evolving feelings that seemed to be erupting for the man you know you would tell him exactly where he could shove those ideas. He was right to apologise.

But does that mean you’re not good enough? You didn’t want to be a wife but there was something nagging at you that wondered if you had disappointed him somehow. It would be easier to be unapologetic about it all but your insecurities get the better of you. “I guess you have some expectations when it comes to certain women. So it makes sense that when I don’t meet them-“

He cuts you off with a resolute shake of his head, concern etching his features. “-Fuck no. Sweetheart please don’t do that. Don’t compare yourself to them. That was my mistake.”

“Well they are your wives.” You shrug, dropping your gaze into your lap. It’s not as though those women were some unobtainable goal. You didn’t even know them in all honesty to pass comment. It was that subtle part of you that wanted to please him that made it difficult for you not to wonder how you measured up to them.

He covers your hand with one of his own. Making you look up to see the sincerity in his expression. “You’re nothing like them butternut. I wouldn’t fucking like you nearly as much if you were trust me. I’m just glad you called me out on it.”

That was a pretty loaded statement to make, one you were sure you would spend a while dissecting later but for now, you just let his reassurance comfort you and reaffirm that you shouldn’t change who you are, even if Negan didn’t like it. Damn you needed a nap.

Not wanting the conversation to get too serious – or more serious than it already had, you squeeze his hand lightly and smirk. “You realise you just said sorry, please and told me you were glad I cussed you out all in one conversation?”

Negan snorts with laughter. “Must be coming down with something.

You chuckle, both knowing that you really ought to go but neither one of you willing to call it quits just yet. It’s your turn to break the comfortable silence when you recall something Negan had said in his rather uncharacteristic outburst.

“I do y’know.”

“What?” With the smile still lingering on his face Negan looks puzzled.

You choose your words carefully, speaking slowly so they don’t get caught in your mouth. “You said before that you didn’t know if I even want you. I just wanted to let you know that I do. Want you that is.”

Slowly, Negan lights up into one of those proud and private smiles that makes you feel a sense of accomplishment. He picks your hand up, turning it to softly kiss your palm in what is somehow the most intimate thing he’s done to date. His drawl is light and playful as he teases you. “Shit princess that’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me.”

With a roll of your eyes you gently shove at his chest. “You’re such a drama queen.”

“Well I must be doing something right because if I heard correctly you just said that you fucking want me.” He boops your nose for added effect making you giggle.

“Can I kiss you?” The words rush out of your mouth in a hushed whisper, surprising even yourself. He catches it though, eyebrows raising lightly in surprise. Wetting his lips as though to start on some new line of teasing or taunting he pauses for a moment just looking at you. Time seems to slow down when he just nods softly instead, his persona as steady and comfortable as ever.

Your stomach churns pleasurably in anticipation. How long have you fantasised about touching him the way that you want to? Sliding one palm around his neck and the other slowly up his chest you try not to rush yourself as arousal begins to build somewhere in the pit of your stomach.

Negan on the other hand seems content to let you go at your own pace, curious to see what you might do. His eyes never stray from you, not missing the way you swallow thickly or the quirk of your lip in a nervous grin. His grip slowly tightens on your hip pulling you in closer as your eyes flutter shut and you lean up to meet him.

A small whimper of relief escapes you as you press your lips against his. For some reason you just knew he’d be good at this and he doesn’t disappoint. With a low groan of his own that does a whole bunch of things to your insides, he pulls you in closer by the small of your back, effortlessly rearranging you to straddle his lap all whilst taking control and moving his mouth against yours in a way that you can only describe as full of raw desire.

Your stomach flips of its own accord, your fingers moving up to rake against his scalp pulling Negan closer and your body presses flush against him flooded with a sudden warmth that takes your breath away. Want and need take over and all pretence is thrown aside as you moan into his mouth, keeping up with Negan’s enthusiasm.

Apparently that’s Negan cue to pull away from you, gently holding you in place when you try to follow him in a lust filled daze. Your brow furrows as you blink at the man wondering why he stopped. Why on earth would he stop? Wasn’t this what you both wanted?

With an appreciative sigh Negan brushes his thumb against your lip, answering your unspoken question with a nod towards your head. “You need to get that bump checked out butternut.”

“Tis but a scratch.” You protest, already feeling the desire beginning to give way to exhaustion. He was right of course but you didn’t want to stop.

With a dejected grumble you slump, rest your head on his shoulder “Fine.”

Negan snorts a laugh, kissing the top of your head. “You’re cute when you’re frustrated kitten.”

“Uh huh.” You grumble about ready to cuss him out.

“Breathe doll face.”

Taking in a deep, shaky breath you try to calm your hormone-addled nerves, lightly fisting the fabric of his t-shirt. If the deep chuckle coming from the man is anything to go by he seems quite amused by the whole thing. Asshole.

“Good girl.” His words send a shiver of satisfaction through you, happy to please him.Tapping your thigh Negan motions for you to stand up, helping you up. You’re not sure if it’s the excitement or the exhaustion or the way you feel dizzy all of a sudden but your stiff and slightly unsteady on your feet at first. Probably another telling sign that it’s not a good time to be over exerting yourself.

You run your fingers through your damp hair not being able to bring yourself to feel disappointed – especially with the way Negan looks at you with pride and admiration, like you’re something precious.

Reaching out to squeeze your hand one final time Negan gives you your marching orders, the dismissal clear from his tone. “Now you’re gonna go and walk that sweet Lil ass to Doc Carson and get checked out then you’re gonna get to bed and have a good long nap. Don’t worry about work for the rest of the week I’ll take care of it okay?”

A full week? For a bump on the head he was being more than generous but then again maybe he was bringing other factors into consideration. With a grin you nod in acknowledgement before turning to go. It occurs to you that you should probably put on some shoes but you don’t feel like salvaging the pair in the bathroom just yet and besides, you have another in your room. The walk to the good doctor isn’t too far anyway. “Thanks Negan.”

“Feel free to stop by anytime butternut.” He adds as you reach the door, leaving an opening for a ‘next time’ wide open once again.

Glancing behind you to see him still sitting in the chair, you nod silently, the smile still evident on your face. It lingers all the way to Carson’s office and warms your insides long after too. For a day filled with horror and pain, you were glad that Negan had been there to keep you company through the aftermath.