#this isn’t direct to anyone it’s just the conversation I’ve seen and I’m bored
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thiagodasilva · 1 year ago
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no dont shut up. speak your truth plss youre the only one around here talking sense
oh girl.
all I’m going to say is this:
the idea that this was all entirely one sided on the club’s part, that they forced him out and he never ever wanted to leave feels sooo exaggerated? brazen? reactionary? I don’t know if I missed anything, I’m so serious, because what we’ve heard for months (leading up to these last few weeks) is that contract negotiations were going nowhere and he ended up wanting to leave in the end because of proposed deals or lack thereof and the club was willing to sell. And we heard that from reliable sources (I only follow fabrizio because he just reports what he hears that he can verify and consistently provides updates. I mean. Mans is famous for being THE most consistently accurate and not putting a spin on things); the other few things I’ve seen have changed the story plenty of times and can come off so biased that you just gotta take it with a grain of salt-I mean take ALL of it as such, it’s the internet, we don’t know everything.
and because we don’t know everything, I’m not going to sit there and definitely say that the club is a never ending evil for “treating” him this way and forcing him to move-if there’s other shit behind the scenes others somehow have heard/know about that I personally have no idea, enlighten me I guess. contract deals went to hell, we don’t know 100% what he turned down or what he was offered etc etc, so I’m personally not going to jump to conclusions. What we DO know for sure is that he’s going to Man U to earn a bunch more money on a five year deal.
And there’s definitely a good chunk of the fanbase saying the same thing about him, that he’s all evil or whatever, so everyone is all over the place picking a front on whose worse but it’s like….none of us knew what went down for real. I don’t care how many “sources” you’ve seen on Twitter and Instagram, we weren’t there, we’re not in his head, we’re not in the board’s heads. So we don’t know who or what is “totally” at fault which is also kind of a juvenile way of looking at things because omigod the world and so many of its issues are GREY.
This has been such a shit year for Chelsea, the board has fucked up, the players have been going through it on and off the pitch, we’re losing almost everyone that we’ve had a bit of a foundation with. Change is here, and it’s frustrating and weird but we’re just fans, not the capitalist billionaires that make the groundbreaking decisions. But all sides of this fandom are coming at throats in the weirdest ways.
You can be upset, sad, mad, heartbroken, frustrated, annoyed but omigod if you’re a chelsea fan and you’re either: 1) wishing the club you support to struggle again next season because your fave is gone and you’re convinced they ruined everything under the sun OR 2) sending past and present players genuine hate or whatever bullshit for the situations going on….what the hell are you even doing here lol.
He’s gone on to another club, his business with Chelsea is done and you can mourn what was and what will never be but it’s bold to assume any of us know what’s up. I’m annoyed about how it all went and it’s bittersweet but I’m not going to damn him or the club over it. (I’ve damned this club and others over more serious bullshit let’s be real). *
I know it’s “just” football and you can be and do whatever you want but omigod. just. THINK for a second.
*and I’m very aware I react to things emotionally/dramatically with football and non football related things alike (that’s how it’s always been? But I’m not about wish death and destruction sincerely over shit that could have easily just been what it is? A business negotiation?) but I always do my best to take a step back and take another look. that’s all I’m trying to say basically.
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mothmanssweetsucculentass · 6 months ago
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Bloody Painter Headcanons
Did y’all miss these? Idc if this seems like a weird direction to go from my past two HC lists, I’ve always loved Helen as a character and I just went and read up on all the compiled lore DeluCat made of him years ago, and I got some HCs fresh in my mind!
I used THIS YouTube video from DeluCat herself as my main source, assume anything I don’t list/discuss here is filled in by anything here. I’m actually really impressed that she did so much research on different serial killers, psych ward operations, and violent crimes to make Helen as realistic as possible.
Expect canon typical horror/mature topics being discussed from this point forward, nothing is censored beyond this point!!!!
Roughly about 25, give or take a few years
STRICTLY he/him, will react violently if anyone calls him different pronouns, especially feminine ones
Despite this, he’s definitely not cis (it’s actually canon that he’s agender! Friendly reminder that pronouns =/= gender)
Like bro you were literally raised to have a gender crisis. Everyone point and laugh at the egg
Jeff used she/her for him once as a joke and he still has deep scars from what Helen decided to do to him
Like I shit you not, Helen took a sizable chunk of skin out of Jeff’s back, and only stopped because Eyeless Jack physically had to hold him back until Jeff left his line of sight
You wouldn’t even expect such violent outbursts from this guy considering how normally calm he is
Barely talks at all tbh
Like, he’ll interact politely with most of the residents of the mansion and isn’t turned off by conversation, but don’t expect him to hold a full conversation if he deems you boring or unimportant
Which tbh he probably will, he’s not super big on friendships considering how his last one went
Mostly prefers to keep to himself and is often in the more run down/abandoned wings of the manor
Has a naturally more feminine looking face (long eyelashes, smaller nose, etc) and does nothing to try and fix/hide it
Has converted one of the dilapidated rooms into an “art” studio
And by art. Heh. Let’s just say. Corpses
No actually he really just has an entire room dedicated to some of the most fucked up art a person is capable of making
Sculptures made out of bones and flesh, jars filled with coagulated blood submerging his taxidermy projects, eyeball jewelry, teeth jewelry, paint made from pummeled organs and flesh, brandings and etchings on stretched human skin, plushies made of human hair, he’s got it all
He also makes more “normal” art, which in reality is just more traditional mediums that still depict his usual obsessions with violence
Has gotten used to the scent of rot and decay like pretty much every resident has, but is one of the few who enjoys it
Is very selfish, self centered, and has an ego larger than Texas
Him and Ben have a somewhat transactional relationship; Helen films all the depraved torture and crafting he enacts and shares it with Ben, and Ben prints out news articles of Helen’s crimes for Helen to make art with, or just look at to admire his handiwork
ZERO empathy. His morals heavily align with the BEN AI, and even somewhat Slenderman’s
Hates animals. Not cause he’s scared of them or anything, but because he finds their existence useless
…unless he’s using it for fucked up taxidermy
LOVES torture the same way Eyelss Jack loves vivisections
One of his favorite things to do is rip a person’s fingernails out one by one, and then severing the hand and using the bleeding nail beds as the world’s most fucked up large paintbrush
Besides art, he loves to read. Kind of a given considering he’s basically the quiet kid
Loves depraved horror novels and serial killer memoirs/autobiographies
Can speak fluent Chinese, and often shit talks other pastas to their faces without them even knowing
Kagekao learned Chinese just so the two could gossip
Similar to EJ, has a more “buff” physique and has been seen breaking bones effortlessly. When you’ve been murdering steadily for over a decade at this point you kinda just learn where the weak/break points are in the human body
Can improvise anything into a weapon
Actually he really loves killing people with unconventional murder weapons. Scenes are often found with things like metal straws lodged in a victim’s sternum, or the top of a bowling pin shoved down a victim’s throat so far their jaw broke and the victim subsequently choked on their own blood from their shattered teeth
He’s gotten so good at this that the other pastas will literally make a game out of it and challenge him to use an outlandish item as a weapon the next time he kills
“Okay okay how about a bong” “are you being serious right now” “just answer the question art boy” “twice, actually. Though technically I think one of them was a really weird ceramic frog instead. That, or a pcp pipe.” “Awesome”
Hates removing his mask around anyone he’s not acquainted with
Gets reeeaaalll fuckin quiet too
Has gotten so good at being stealthy he doesn’t even alert or startle people like Eyeless Jack does
Surprisingly enough he actually gets enough sleep compared to most of the other residents of the manor
He’s also able to get comfortable and sleep practically anywhere, in the weirdest positions too. Is often found passed out in his studio sitting up, or laying on the floor covered in metal torture tools and bones
Despite his lack of empathy, his blood boils and he seethes if anyone dares to mess with Sally
The first day he stumbled across the manor and introduced himself by what the media called him, Sally gave him a drawing of himself, and he vowed on the spot to look out for the little snot
Is already a naturally patient person, and is incredibly patient and gentle when explaining how to do specific art things to Sally
Jokingly “agrees” with Sally about not liking doctors whenever she’s around eyeless Jack (though in his case he hates psych doctors vastly more than physical ailment doctors)
Back to the patience thing: will stalk a victim for months to toy with them. He has an eternity to do this to people with his newfound abilities granted to him by slenderman, why rush?
Helen 🤝 BEN/Ben = malewhore mansplain manipulate
Will say anything to get what he wants
Thinks in a very transactional and technical way. If you don’t do or offer something to benefit him first, he doesn’t even see you as a person
Is friends/close with: Sally, Eyeless Jack, BEN/Ben, Jason, Ann, and KageKao
Has a tolerable relationship with/is very neutral about: Masky, Hoody, Jane, Liu, Puppeteer, LJ, and Slenderman
Doesn’t get along with/HATES: clockwork, Nina, and Jeff
Him and Jason often collaborate together on pieces involving still living people
Him and Ann have a mutual distaste for doctors/hospital settings, and can often be found stitching up their wounds (or sometimes in Helen’s case a piece involving human flesh) together
Ace, heavily questioning if he’s aro too
He finds Ann aesthetically pleasing to look at, but his thoughts don’t go any further than that. Often uses her as figure practice (with her consent)
Is mainly fascinated by the fact she’s a walking sentient corpse
Tried cannibalism once, wasn’t a fan
Tried going to both Eyeless Jack and Ann once during a dysphoria-spurred panic attack and begged for bottom surgery
“But why tho” “I’m ace. I don’t need it. Don’t women who never want to get pregnant get rid of their uteruses anyways?” “Well, yes, but-“ “so help me god get this thing off my body”
Obviously one of the few times he actually doesn’t appear calm and put together to people. Tries his damn hardest to hide these panic attacks unless around Eyeless Jack or Ann. Would be mortified if Ben, Sally, or any of the loud judgmental pastas saw him in this state
Gives a lot of his full corpse art pieces a physical sex swap
You’re dead but hey free top surgery and you get to be fucked up art
Honestly doesn’t give a shit about symbolism, makes art of whatever he wants/feels like and makes it pretty clear there’s no hidden meaning
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decent0distraction · 10 months ago
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Does anyone else watch those teacher skit videos on TikTok by SquireHaligast I think his name is?
Well, if you do, here’s my head canons on the characters, if you care. I might add drawings later if I’m feeling brave, but we’ll see.
To begin, we have Ethan.
Ethan is male, he/him. He has an average group of friends who do average teen things. I wouldn’t say he’s really in any clubs or sports, since he canonically is jaded and apathetic. He slacked off a bit his first two years of high school. Now a junior taking a senior class (which is canon), he wants to be done with school but he isn’t sure where he wants to go with his life.
During the conversation he and Haligast have in the theme episode (the one where Ethan is bored and can’t focus and the assignment is to read a short paragraph and identify the theme), Ethan mocks Haligast by looking through the classifieds. Haligast suggests he should be an English teacher, telling him that he’ll have be able to identify theme though. This gets Ethan to focus.
Based on that, my headcanon is that Ethan considers becoming a teacher but instead goes on to be a high school counselor instead. He understands what’s it like to be a lost kid, laughing at everything until you wake up one morning and you don’t get the joke anymore. Or maybe you just can’t, because you’re too tired; too bored.
Next up is Sam. I wasn’t sure about their gender at first, but someone said they sound like Brennan Lee Mulligan and after rewatching the “New assigned seats game” episode and the episode where Sam is “upset” about being in Haligast’s class again, here’s what I came up with.
Sam, they/him, chronically intelligent to the point that they don’t see the point in not being in control, because if it were up to these idiots he would never admit he loved, everything would go down like a lead balloon. In the episode where Sam helps Ethan figure out what score he needs on the next assignment, Sam uses language and vocab associated with Dungeons and Dragons. A big part of my headcanon is that Sam not only hosts DND games with his friends, but he convinced Haligast to host the DnD club at the school when he was only a freshman.
Sam seems to have a love/hate relationship with Ethan. Ethan isn’t nearly as smart as Sam, but Ethan is much more flexible. Like Ethan, Sam is a junior taking a senior class. But while Ethan had to request the harder class and make up in summer school for skipping Junior Lit, Sam got placed in class due to exceptional grades. I like think that they were friends maybe in the 8th grade or at some point, but as Sam became more and more ahead of the curb, Ethan was further left behind. As juniors, they still hang out in class, but they don’t sit together at lunch and you’ll never catch Ethan in DnD club or Sam at whatever sports game Ethan is pretending to care about.
John! My favorite character, honestly. He/him, John has always been quiet. Everyone is used to it. They don’t expect him to speak, so when he finally does (like in the pep assembly episode), they’re taken aback.
But John knows who he is and he cares about his friends and his grades. When he gets a taste of being the teacher, of being someone that important, he realizes that he wants to be seen. He just needed the right stage. He goes on to be a teacher (an English teacher obviously)
The kid in the t shirt. We don’t know their name. We just know that they’re usually the mediator between Sam and Ethan. In the transfer from 3rd period episode, they come off as petty and almost resentful of the kids named from 3rd period, eyeing Alex when they come in.
Until we have a name, my headcanon is that this is the first official girl of the group. I’ve been calling her Emily in my notes, I don’t know why.
But Emily, she/her, doesn’t get involved unless it directly concerns her. In the “Stalemate, Almost” episode where the kids argue over a game, movie, or talking, she tries to direct them to one thing, which prompts Sam to ask if she’ll be boring forever or if she’ll get a personality for Christmas.
Emily is intelligent, but she can disengage unlike Sam. She’s relaxed like Ethan, but she can go toe to toe with Sam. I don’t think we’ve seen her interact with John, but we get two filler characters in “Stalemate, Almost”. One is wearing a long sleeved black shirt and the other is in a grey t shirt. Ethan bargains with the kid in the long sleeved black shirt, and Emily backs him up. Grey t shirt kid counter argues and Emily keeps it up, defending her stance with the other movie people.
Overall, Emily is a chameleon, but she’s not afraid to stand by her friends and her opinions. I definitely think she and Sam are academic rivals.
Alex, the transfer kid, they/her. I choose to believe that she and John are friends, given how they immediately sit next to him and talk about how they’re excited to be in the class.
Alex is from 3rd period, which is described as calmer by their own teacher. I think that means that Alex is hardworking, friendly, and keeps to herself. She’s polite to the others when she walks in, but she directly speaks to John. She greets Sam, who doesn’t actually say hi to her. My headcanon is that she was invited to Sam’s dnd club by a friend or boyfriend/girlfriend and Sam is simply threatened by her.
Alex plays themself off to not be as intelligent as she actually is, claiming she doesn’t know what the counselor meant when they said they had to “even things out”. She comes off as fidgety and nervous, but she’s better at conversation and settling in than John is.
That’s all I have so far. I think it’s kind of weird that I’m making headcanons for these videos, but it’s my comfort show (I know it’s not a show, shut up). Don’t overthink any of this. It’s just for fun.
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eremiie · 4 years ago
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karma;
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❥ 16k words | nsfw | eren x fem!reader
❥ content - eren eats reader out,, eren also fucks reader ;)
❥ you don’t care much for eren’s fuckboy habits until he fucks over your friend, and you’re left to deal with the consequences. and eren’s left to deal with a revelation neither of you saw coming
this is based off the song karma by summer walker, so feel free to take a listen!
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"i just don't get it— like how foul could you be? if he didn't like me that's all he had to say, not play me like i'm some dummy,"
"historia," you stopped her ramble with a sigh, lifting your hand up as a gesture to say 'stop'.
"i told you, you should've just got with me." ymir snorted, throwing her hand around historia's shoulder, the blonde pouting, her eyebrows furrowing.
you place a hand on historia's lower back and gave her a condescending look. "i told you that you shouldn't mess with him, i wasn't trying to be dramatic or anything when i said that— i know eren... i gave you a heads up and you ignored it."
historia rolled her eyes and shrugged her shoulders. "i didn't ignore it, i just... thought it'd be different."
you scrunched your face up and pinched the bridge of your nose. "why exactly did you think it would be different?"
"instead of giving historia shit, _____," ymir emphasized your name, squinting her eyes at you. "why can't i just rock him? a good punch to the face is maybe just what he needs—"
"ymir, punching him will not solve anything. plus, i doubt historia wants you to punch him either."
"she can speak for herself, idiot. historia, my love, would you like me to knock eren out?"
historia sighed. "no, i don't want anyone to get knocked out. this is so confusing... and not to interfere with your friendship or anything but how can you just go hang out with him right after?"
you looked down at historia, removing your hand from her back and giving her a raise of your eyebrow, looking forward to wear the three of you were headed. you were going to hang out with eren; he was your closest friend who you met in middle school, and now shared a dorm with. it was finally spring break, and as his bestfriend you were invited to spend some time with him and his family for the vacation. eren had you pack bags for the weekend and wanted you to meet him in the front of the building, so that's where your feet were taking you while you conversed with your friends you met on your way. "historia, i said i told you not to fuck with him, what happens between you and eren doesn't have anything to do with me." historia frowned at you and looked down at her crossed arms and you felt a small sense of guilt curdling in your stomach. "i'll talk to him though."
"right now? cause he's right there." ymir said using her head to tilt towards the benches once she pushed the large doors to the outside open. you looked up and ymir was right, from a distance was eren standing up next to a shag of blonde hair and two other people that you couldn't identify as they weren't facing you. almost on cue, eren looked up, head whipping to your figure and a small smirk creeped up on his face until his eyes landed on the two next to you, that smirk dissipating almost just as fast, and him quickly averting eye contact, mumbling something that caused the rest of his acquaintances to turn their heads around. you shook your head and patted historia's shoulder noticing she was glaring at eren, but not as hard as ymir.
"yes, now... uh, i'll catch you guys later." you said waving off to them. "don't worry too much about him historia." and with that you began walking off towards eren. you studied his appearance, hair lazily threw back into his signature messy bun while stray pieces shied away from it. he wore a simple grey sweatshirt with black sweatpants to complete the lazy look, white sneakers on his feet, and when you trailed your eyes back to his face a boyish smile was present.
"hey." eren said simply, arms stretched out to pull you into a warm hug that you reciprocated, your arms wrapping around his midsection as he snuggled you into him, resting his chin on the top of your head.
"hey, eren." you cheesed, pulling back to wave to the rest of the group. "eren's brother," you watched zeke chuckle from where he was seated. you used your finger to point to yelena after, "yelena, pieck and porco!"
"i'm assuming you know my name and you're just being a fool." zeke announced, making you giggle and place your hand on top of his blonde locks. although you didn't see the upperclassmen much, you had no problem remembering their names, especially zeke and pieck as you saw them the most.
"right, of course i know your name, zeke." you smiled. "but what's the gathering about eren?" you motioned to the clutter of people, looking towards eren who's eyes were already on you.
zeke was faster than eren, answering the question before him causing eren to narrow his eyes at his older brother. "eren, my favorite brother here wants to take my car to see his mom and my dad."
you laughed at his words, the enunciation on the last part of his sentence making eren's eye twitch. "first of all i'm your only brother." eren said, rolling his eyes.
"and you guys share the same dad." you grinned as zeke nodded his head at your clarification, another burst of laughter being let out by you and pieck who shook her head at zeke's antics.
"hi, _____, it's been a while since i've seen you." pieck said, waving her hand as well, her head laid down against the surface below her.
"hey, pieck," you slid down onto the bench taking a seat beside her, porco's hand snaking around her back instinctively. "yeah it has, but that's because you're a year above me." pieck chuckled and nodded her head.
"precisely..." she hummed, moving a strand of raven black hair out of her face, eyes trained in the direction ymir and historia walked off. "who were the girls giving eren the dirty eye?"
your eyes followed pieck's. "oh, historia... and ymir." of course, her out of everyone would notice that. you silently praised pieck for being so observant. you looked up at eren to see him avoiding your gaze, his bouncing left to right.
"what did eren do this time?" zeke asked you, propping his head up on his palm as if he was genuinely interested in the conversation, although you were sure it was just to make fun of eren. pieck gave a confused look, her eyebrows coming together as she glanced between the brothers and you.
"more like what did the girls do to eren." yelena said calmly, a bored expression present on her face, her arms crossed leaning forward on the table.
you averted your stare at eren and propped your arms up on the table like yelena. "well, the blonde girl likes eren and they were talking or something, and um... he was messing with some one else at the same time. she's not happy about that, even though i told her not to mess with him."
"so what i'm hearing is it's her fault for messing with him after you told her not to? lesson learned." yelena scoffed, her large eyes portraying a mocking sorrowful expression.
eren shifted uncomfortably at the new eyes on him, letting out an exasperated sigh. "listen,"
"eren, you really can't defend yourself here." zeke cut him off, eyes widening to poke at eren's expense.
"i didn't know she liked me!" eren blurted out, hands flying out from his sides.
"so your brother's a dumbass too?" porco snorted, eren glaring at him with a huff, crossing his arms back.
"pock—" pieck started, being cut off by eren's rising tone.
"i'm not kidding, i didn't know!"
"so you didn't know a girl who you fucked and kept texting you after had feelings for you?" your retort was quick, head inching forward as your eyes narrowed at eren as if he was dumb causing eren to glare at you too, his lips in a thin line at your statement before placing his hand out for zeke to place the keys in his hand.
"okay, whatever, let's go."
"someone's upset." pieck added before placing her hand on your shoulder. "bye, _____, see you at the club tonight?"
"club?" your ears perked. oh, the club. as well as vacation for spring break, majority of your first and second years decided to takeover a club not too far from campus before people left off for their families. you had already packed a dress for the event when you packed your bags last night alongside eren. the event had just slipped your mind. "oh, yeah, yeah. if eren still want's to go."
zeke slapped the keys in eren's hand, you getting up from the bench with a wave to the remaining three, going to stand beside eren. zeke stood up as well, bringing you into a suffocating hug, his beard grazing your forehead before pulling back with a pat to your shoulder. "well, see you. tell miss carla i said hello because eren won't."
you smiled at zeke before eren grabbed your hand with his free one, giving it a small tug. "don't worry, i will zeke."
with a small "c'mon," from eren, he began pulling you away, you trailing after the boy until the two of you reached zeke's parked car. "you really need to get your own car." you murmured to eren as he opened the back door for you to throw your bag in, alongside his, then the passengers side before walking around to the drivers.
"nah, zeke's is good for now." eren slid into the driver's seat, adjusting the chair before starting the car, giving you a one over to make sure you were comfortable, noticing the way your face shriveled up at the smell of the car. "smells like cigarretes?" he asked you, a small smile upturning on his face, his expression almost softening.
you turned your head towards him with a reciprocating smile at his observation. "yeah, but it's okay. your mom's house isn't too far anyways." eren pulled out of the parking lot, letting your last statement resonate in the air while he watched for cars behind him, hand on the back of the head of your seat, brows furrowed in concentration while you opened up your phone, scrolling through your socials. you noticed the party tonight was the talk of today, almost everyone of your mutuals on your feed talking about it. it didn't sound too bad, and you didn't mind going either, getting to see your friends was enjoyable. "so we're going to that party?"
eren's eyes shot to your face from the rear view mirror, lingering for a little before going back to the road ahead. "as long as you want too— i mean, i want to. why? you don't have something to wear? i thought we packed last night."
"dummy, i'm just confirming with you. i have something to wear, you literally watched me pick out my clothes."
eren stayed silent for a couple minutes while beginning to grin at you unconsciously. "yeah, i saw it, the dress. i was gonna say you could borrow one of my moms if you didn't have one." he joked, looking to you to watch you give him a raise of your brow and an upturn of your lip.
"you're such an idiot." you looked back down to your phone to switch apps. "who's gonna be there that i know? i know sasha will probably go, i haven't seen her lately."
"me." eren said matter of factly, not even looking your way for a reaction.
you rolled your eyes, hitting him on the shoulder lightly. "i'm serious."
"im serious too."
"eren!" you whined his name, his look fixing on you again at the sound of his name before shifting away just as quickly.
"you know, the usual... sasha will probably be there, armin probably wants to see annie or something... connie... maybe jean, or reiner or whatever."
"or whatever." you mocked eren, lowering your tone to try to get his voice spot on, causing him to slap your thigh hard, you yelping and dropping your phone to rub at the abused spot, your leer shooting daggers at eren. "i'm telling carla when we get there."
eren only laughed, bringing his hand back to your thigh and moving your hand to soothe the supple skin with a flitting rub while you pouted at him. "she'd hurt me if i hurt you."
"you did!" your voice raising slightly, hand moving his away but not before pinching the skin on top causing him to hiss.
"sorry." his hand returned to your hand sitting on your leg, giving it a small squeeze of reassurance while he studied your face just in case you had a negative reaction.
you let his palm linger, the feeling almost comforting, and... and what? you couldn't pinpoint it, but for the majority of the rest of the ride, his hand stayed until he had no choice but to remove it when steering. a sense of anxiousness was relieved when he did, but you couldn't figure out why.
                                 彡
"go inside, i'll get our bags, my mom will be happy to see you." eren said, signaling to his front door with your hand, and you nodded walking to the small house. a sense of nostalgia was washed over you. you vaguely remembered coming over to eren's house so often and spending so much time with him, mikasa and armin. of course, mikasa being so busy with her own studies could only visit so much, but there were many times she came back to visit alongside you and eren, armin occasionally visiting as well although he had family to go back to as well. you and eren constantly did almost everything together, from indulging in video games he used to side eye you for wanting to play with him, to helping his mom in the kitchen with a grumble from eren, to getting into heated arguments and having to sit on the couch with carla since eren would kick you out of his room, only to be scolded by carla only minutes later. it was all enjoyable memories, even the arguments, and thank goodness to the closeness of the college to eren's old house. you were able to visit and relive those memories so often, a sense of warmth washing over you each and every time.
not only were you thankful for the proximity of carla's house, but you were thankful for her constant efforts to keep you and eren close. she was the one who suggested requesting a shared dorm, the one who constantly asked eren to bring you over, the one that never failed to ask about you every time she called eren. if you and eren ever lost your bond she'd be the first to know.
you walked up the steps, the door already unlocked as carla anticipated your arrival. as soon as you opened the door the significant scent of linen and apple flooded your nose, along with whatever she was cooking up. the mass of carla's dark hair was in your line of sight once you turned your head to the side, her body stood in front of the stove, and she whipped her own head around hazel eyes almost bulging out there head when she spotted your figure at the front door. "_____!" she exclaimed, immediately dropping the pan she was holding back onto the stove and rushing to you, embracing you in a loving hug. "my baby, i missed you so much! eren brought you!"
and eren, always on time stepped in behind you, his tall figure towering over you and his mom with two bags in his hand.
"and my real baby, oh i missed you both so much." carla pulled away giving you chaste kisses on side of your face, her long eyelashes fluttering against your skin as she cradled your jaw with her nimble fingers. her apron decorated around her waist smelled of fresh cooking, but her perfume lingered as well giving off a haze of peppermint.
she moved towards eren, her hands cupping his face and pressing a kiss to his cheek as well, moving her fingers to tug on his ear playfully before drifting down to his shoulder, patting his chest then pulling the bags out of his hand. "mom—" eren murmured, twisting his face at his mom's protectiveness as she dragged the bags out of his hand, going over to place them beside the staircase before coming back over, hands clasped in front of her guests.
"no, you just came, no need to try to put stuff away yet." carla said with a cheery smile, still elated at the arrival of the two of you. "i'm so glad you're here, i just finished cooking so let's all sit and eat before you try to do anything else." she began walking back towards the pan she left on the stove, head turned back with a knowing look at eren who would try to go put the bags upstairs. "come sit." and you and eren made your way to the round dining table, four seats present, yet only three would be filled.
"where's dad?" eren asked as he sat down, pulling the chair out for you first while you fiddled with your fingers, watching carla plate the lunch she prepared.
carla's movements slowed as she sat in thought for a couple seconds. "oh... he's at work, like always you know." eren looked down, nodding his head.
"so how's school going?" carla asked, heading over to place down a bowl. "chicken pasta salad, it's good, eat." she used her head to motion towards the food.
"it's going good, luckily i don't have that heavy of a workload like others, it's bearable, but of course still hard." you replied, as she brought over plates and cutlery, setting them down in front of eren and you, both of you immediately scooping some pasta onto your plates.
"and you, eren?"
"it's fine, mom."
"how about football? is that going good?"
"yeah, it's good too." you winced at eren's lack of effort in the conversation, hitting his elbow with your own, him giving you a confused expression before he placed his full fork in his mouth.
"zeke told me to tell you hi." you told carla as she came to sit in front of the two of you, plating her own food, eyes widening at the mention of zeke's name.
"really?"
"yeah."
"well then how's zeke doing too then?"
"i don't know, i don't see him much, eren could probably tell you." you gave eren the opportunity to talk, looking at him to cue him to say something while you took another forkful of the pasta.
"he's probably fine too, i don't see him much either." eren replied with a shrug of his shoulders, picking at his food, and you sighed.
"how's sharing a dorm going? i hope eren's not too much, i know he can be a ruckus."
"it's good too, he's a better roommate than i thought he'd be at first." you let out a small laugh, remembering eren's old antics, how messy his room used to be, the dark green of his walls and the miscellaneous decorations he used to have sprung around. you couldn't wait to go upstairs and check that out again. "he's still a little messy—"
"but she always nags me to clean up so that doesn't matter." eren cut you off before you could attempt to compliment him and you rolled your eyes.
"i wasn't gonna say anything bad. yeah he cleans up a little more now but i always have to pick up a sock or something. plus, i'm the one who has to clean up before someone comes to visit. like mikasa or armin or something." you chose not to mention the countless girls that'd come in and out too.
carla pursed her lips looking up at eren with a slightly disappointed look. "you always have to keep your workspace and your room clean, eren. especially in the presence of others, i didn't tell you that all the time for no reason."
"i know, i know, mom."
"no you don't because if you did you'd keep your area clean in respect for ______." carla placed more of her food in her mouth with a shake of her head before moving her failing ponytail to her back from her shoulder, then looking up at you. her doe eyes were just like eren's, he was the spitting image of her and it's one reason why you could never forget her face. "how's mikasa and armin?"
"they're good too, mikasa couldn't come this time, she has too much going on i guess— but she's fine!" a slight moment of worry crossed carla's face, eyebrows turning up and lips frowning as she twirled her fork in the food in front of her.
"hopefully she can come next time, tell her to relax. poor girl, always has so much on her plate. i remember when she used to be here she constantly had to do eren's chores for him, what a doll."
eren scratched his head, looking down at his almost empty plate. "i did work too, she didn't do everything for me."
carla ignored eren's add on."and armin?"
eren answered before you could. "he's good too."
"i hope so, he's such a sweet boy." carla hummed. "so how long are you guys staying? and how long's your break?"
"only a week, we'll be here for this weekend cause zeke is gonna need his car back." your plate was almost finished as well, fork scraping against the ceramic.
"yeah, but later today we're heading back up to go to a party." eren said nonchalantly, eyeing his fork as he spun it in his hand.
"i hope that's okay with you— if you don't want us to go we don't have to." you hastily added in consideration for carla, eren's green eyes narrowing at you with a small frown. he clearly wanted to have some fun tonight.
"no, no! that's perfectly fine, you'll be here for the whole weekend, i'll let you kids have your fun." carla smiled. "i'm just glad you came earlier than waiting until after the party cause i know you'll get back late and i'll probably be sleeping. who's birthday is it?"
"it's not a birthday." eren stuffed the last of his food in his mouth, chewing before continuing. "just a spring break party before everyone goes home."
"oh? so that's what you do in college nowadays?" carla laughed, peering at eren's plate, content that he finished his food. you joined her in laughing, ushering yourself to finish up as well, knowing eren might get impatient with your pace at eating.
"i guess. there are parties all the time. but how have you been?"
carla beamed at your asking. "i'm good! nothing much, i wait for grisha to come home, although i'm usually just here alone. i have my hobbies though, i'm fine. i've been trying to make friends with the neighbors too, they have some younger kids that are enjoyable." as you listened to carla you finished your food as well, her getting up to gather the empty plates and take them to the sink. "thank you for asking, _____. eren, honey can you put the top on the pasta and put it in the fridge? i'll make dinner later just in case you want something else when you get home tonight."
eren pushed his seat back, standing up to do as his mom said, wandering towards the fridge. "that's fine, we should just give you a break, we'll eat the pasta again when we get back, you can just relax, right eren?" you said, watching carla and eren maneuver around the kitchen while you got up to wash your hands at the sink beside carla.
"yeah that's cool too. you don't have to cook mom."
carla pouted endearingly at the two of you with an "awe," leaving her lips. "the two of you are so sweet. i'll clean up, you can go upstairs now." and with that you and eren left her to her own devices, eren grabbing the bags at the stairs and almost pushing you up the stairs.
"that was good, i'm full." you sighed, as you walked beside eren down the hall until he opened the door to his old room. the walls were still a muddy green, a decision you're sure he probably regret now. miscellaneous posters decorated his wall, an oak desk sat idle in the corner of his room beside a collection of simple books. his bed was made, navy comforter sprawled out on the bed and plump pillows sitting pretty. his bed was big enough for the two of you to share, but carla always asked if you wanted to sleep in mikasa's room when you came. you always declined. "look at your certificates." you pointed to the certificates framed on the wall as eren set the bags down on the floor beside his desk.
"shut up." eren grabbed your wrist, pulling you towards his bed until you collapsed onto it beside him. “'m tired." he groaned, his face down into the cover below him, arm slumped over your waist where you laid. you were going to pester eren about his situation with historia, but you decided to leave him alone for the time being.
"you can take a nap before we leave."
eren turned his head to the side so his cheek was smushed against the bed instead, looking at your form, your head pointed towards the ceiling. "you wanna take one with me?"
you faced eren, giving him a stank face before poking his cheek. "just cause you're tired doesn't mean i am. i'll lay here though, i'll wake you up when we should start getting ready." you slipped your phone out of your pocket to check the time. "you have until like five thirty-ish. it's four."
eren squeezed your side, that same anxious feeling rising as he did so, pulling you a little closer, eyes shutting. "take a nap with me."
"no."
"c'mon."
"eren, i'm not tired." he opened his eyes again, piercing green blue hues staring at you head on. he removed his arm from around you, picking his head up and scooting up to his pillow, now facing away from you with a huff. "whatever, i'll wake you up later." he didn't respond, and around fifteen minutes after, once he was asleep you got up from the bed.
shuffling downstairs, you turned the corner to the living room, seeing carla seated on the couch watching tv. "hi, mrs. carla." you said lowly, her head turning back fast as usual, and simpering when she saw your face.
"you're okay?" her hand moved to find the remote, turning down the volume on the tv as you came to sit beside her. her soft hand found yours, grasping it. "enjoying the stay so far, right?"
"of course. eren's sleeping so i wanted to keep you some company."
"that's too sweet of you. he's doing fine too, right?"
"yeah, probably just tired from staying up all night. he was up pretty late yesterday." you reminisced on the small argument you had with eren just the previous night before, you pestering him about his reluctance to sleep, him making you irritable being on the phone with who knows in the dead of the night.
carla nods her head in understanding. "so tell me more about the party."
you look up to the ceiling in thought as she rubbed your knuckles. "well, eren wants to go more than me. i wouldn't have minded staying here if he wanted too, but i guess he wants to see some people."
'hm, are you going to see some people?" she wiggled her shoulders in a taunting manner, and you chuckled in response.
"nope, just gonna chill."
"well... don't get too drunk or anything. i want my babies safe...” she looked at you with large eyes, curiousity present on her face. “are you seeing someone?" she asked abruptly.
you were slightly caught off-guard by the question, but were a little glad carla felt so comfortable basking in your private life. "we won't, don't worry. but um, no i'm not."
"i see... is eren? anything he's not telling me?" you pondered, not wanting to tell too much about eren's own personal relationships despite it being his mom. i mean— would you want someone telling your mom about you breaking girls hearts? you decided to enlighten her a little bit, make her feel like she was somewhat apart of eren's romantic life.
"he doesn't tell me much either, to be honest. i guess he's just trying his luck with girls. he has no problem catching their attention anyways, so i don't think you have to worry much about that."
carla looked at you, an unreadable expression visible on her face through the small moment of silence. she let go of your hand, putting hers back in her lap. "i'm glad you know it too." she half joked, looking to her lap. "... trying his luck?"
you shrugged your shoulders, feeling a tad bit uncomfortable, letting your hand come up to scratch at your jaw. "something like that... i don't know, he's just doing his own thing."
carla's eyes darted back and forth between you and her legs, trying to find something to say, mouth opening and closing every time she thought she had came up with the right words. "_____, i really like you, and enjoy your presence you know. you're really great to eren, i appreciate that. i want you to keep looking out for him, i want the best for him. whatever he has going on, help him figure it out, be the best version of himself as possible."
your words were so vague but you felt like she saw right through them. her words were so vague and you had trouble deciphering them.
"... of course, yeah, i'm looking out for him, he's my bestfriend."
"yeah... that's also true." carla sighed, and you hope she didn't notice the confusion that crossed your face for a brief moment.
saving you from the slightly awkward silence, carla turned the volume up on the television, the two of you sitting and watching whatever was present on screen.
soon enough, eren's foot steps were heard, both you and carla turning your head to see eren standing at the bottom of the steps, and irritated tired look on his face. he rubbed at his eyes, moving away some of the stray hairs in his face before slapping his palm back down to his thigh.
"what are you doing?" his voice was rumbly and deep from sleep, tone impatient.
"talking to your mom?" your response was more of a question, carla patting your thigh for you to get up.
"its six thirteen."
"i left my phone upstairs with you, grumpy." you glanced to carla. "he's always like this when he wakes up."
"i can recall." a chuckle left her lips as she shooed you away. "the two of you can get ready."
so you followed eren back upstairs, toeing behind him until you got to his room. you scurried to get your attire and products from your bag, and with your belongings in hand, you went off to the bathroom to get ready and give eren his own privacy.
soon enough you were dressed and freshened up. your strapped blush silk dress adorned with ruches up the side hugged every curve of yours, while your hair sat pretty. you sighed in content, grabbing your perfume bottle and spritzing yourself, the smell of vanilla engulfing your senses. you looked at yourself in the mirror appreciating the way you looked, your lips glossed, and your earrings dangled just above your shoulders.
from the mirror view you could see eren come in behind you, his eyes trailing down your body from your reflection in the mirror. you didn't bother facing him, only stepping slightly to the side to take a look at him as well, a plain black shirt on his upper half, accompanied by black jeans as well, and some sneakers. his pendant hung in his hand, gold watch to match on his left wrist. of course, he never did much to his hair, as it was still pulled back in the same ponytail from before his nap.
"sit down on the toilet." eren side eyed you before sitting on the lid of the toilet, you coming up in front of him to pull the hair tie out of his hair. "your hair's a mess, and i'll put the necklace on."
surprisingly, no complaints from eren arose, he sat quiet as you carded your fingers through his brown locks, pulling his hair back into a neater bun, flyaways still decorating his face in a more purposeful manner. hair tickled the back of his hair as well, but you liked the messy look. you grabbed the pendant from his rough hands, unclasping the back before putting it around his neck, him leaning forward to give you a better angle while he stared down at your feet. "better."
eren looked over you from where he sat on the toilet seat, a calm face present. "aren't you gonna get cold? or your feet might hurt." he pointed to your white heels detailed with clear.
"i'll be fine," you dusted his shoulder before he stood up, once again towering over you, seemingly more intimidating now that he stood straight up. "i have a jacket that i'll put in the car."
you and eren made your way back downstairs, your jacket and phone now in hand, eren likewise. carla practically gasped at the sight of you two, her eyes growing like saucers at your attire. "you guys look so cute!" she came over, taking your hands into hers. "all grownup."
"mom..." eren exasperated, grabbing your wrist to pull you more towards the front door, away from carla.
"eren, it's okay," you pulled out of his grip, turning back towards her. "thank you so much."
carla smiled, heading towards eren. "and my handsome boy," she swiped at his shirt, making sure there were no dust particles on it much like you had did earlier, then tugging at the key pendant on his neck, straightening the necklace. "you guys be safe, i love you."
eren placed his hand over his mom's, moving it down from the chain and back into her own vicinity. "yeah, love you too." his hand made a 'come on' gesture, and with a tilt of his head, you were following him again. "let's go."
                                       彡
"eren, wait." he didn't hear you, still making his way around the crowd of bodies, annoyance creeping up in your veins as you tried to keep up with him. "eren!" still, no response, only him still moving forward making you groan in annoyance. you rolled your eyes for the umpteenth time, and let them land on the bar next to you. "hitch!" you called out, her and the blonde next to her turning towards the sound of her name being called, who you soon recognized as annie.
hitch waved you over excitedly, almost bouncing in her seat at the sight of you. you made your way over, sitting beside her as she pulled you into a tight hug. "____, hey! didn't really think you'd be here."
"why not?" you hummed, bartender looking your way to see if you would hint that you wanted a drink.
"not sure, i just thought you'd be chilling in your room right about now. i was just telling annie about some boys, there's a lot of cute ones here if you want to get some."
"i'm good." you peered down at her drink, clear liquid detailed with greenery, a lime sitting on the side of the glass. "what are you drinking?"
"a mojito," hitch wiggled her eyebrows as she recalled the drink in a sing song voice. "wanna try it?" she pushed it towards your lips. you shrugged your shoulders sipping at her straw without a care. the drink stung a bit, your face twisting as you shook your head.
"i'll just get a martini. what's annie drinking?"
"dunno, probably water." hitch moved a piece of her hair behind her ear, glancing at the clear liquid in front of annie. "oh, yeah. like i was saying..." her voice trailed off to you as you began to talk to the bartender, ordering yourself a martini.
you sipped on your drink, only half listening to hitch. every time she tried to confirm that you were listening by going "right, _____?" you would nod your head even if you couldn't remember the last thing she said.
"_____, _____!" a familiar raspy voice was calling your name, pulling you out of your thoughts. you, hitch and annie once again looked towards the source of the sound, sasha's hand outstretched in your direction as she came forward, dragging along connie. "hey, you're here!"
you shot sasha a smile, putting down your drink and embracing her into a side hug, waving at connie as well. "hey, sash! yeah, how'd you know?"
"i went to go find connie so he could buy me a drink, and i saw eren and asked if you were here too. he said you didn't know where you were though, but what a coincidence." sasha made herself comfortable in the seat beside you, connie staying standing as there were no more seats to the left of sasha. "what's that?" she pulled your martini forward, putting it to her lips with no hesitance, beaming at the taste. "this, what's this?"
you laughed at sasha's antics, her presence making the event at hand all the more better, you missed hanging out with her, only having night classes with her the semester before. "it's a martini."
"yeah, connie, get me this!" connie let out a sigh and went to the other side of the bar where there was seating to comfortably order and wait for sasha’s drink. "he's so nice, i literally forgot my wallet, and that would've been so tragic if they had some good food here." sasha hummed, reluctantly pushing your drink back over in front of you. "how long have you been here?"
"not for long," you responded, taking another sip of your drink. "maybe like thirty minutes or so, eren left me like as soon as we got here so i've just been sitting with hitch and annie." you gestured to the girls beside you, hitch engaging annie in more conversation who almost forcibly listened, seeming to care less, although hitch told her anyways, getting the occasional nod from the blonde.
"oh, i've been here for like an hour now, i met this really cute boy. i don't know his name but he's blonde, and cute, like really cute." she clasped her hands together at the thought of the boy. "i danced with him, he was so nice, i need to find him again tonight." when connie returned with her drink she thanked him profusely, hugging his arm dramatically before letting him go so he could return to his other friends, waving off to you once more.
"well, find out his name maybe."
"i had it, i just forgot!" she pondered. "i think it started with an m, or an n or something, i don't know." you laughed again, taking another drink of the beverage in front of you ice basically being left in the glass, sasha beginning to drink hers as well. "you should come out to the floor and dance, it's literally so fun. plus, everyone else would probably wanna see you. historia is here! jean is too, and like— some other people."
"are you gonna finish your drink first?" you had no problem going out to dance, although you rather just watch from the outside.
"i'll take it with me. is that a yes? c'mon!" sasha exclaimed, picking her drink off the table and pulling you from your seat. you and sasha made your way through the surplus of bodies until you felt the surface under your heels change. you didn't see anyone you knew but you were sure sasha did as she perked up then looking back at you. "there's the boy, look!" you followed her direction of sight a boy with a middle part, blonde strands flopping at the sides of his forehead. he was cute for sasha, and the joy that glowed on her face made you smile.
you truly did miss her, and the excitement she brought into your own life, coercing you to go out to eat with her, begging to come over after classes despite it being night, and pushing you to attend parties and events.
"can i go over to him?" sasha begged, tightening her hold on your arm before making puppy dog eyes. "look," and with her finger she pointed towards a connie, him speaking while moving back and forth to the song playing loudly, music filling your ears. "connie is over there, i'll take you over." you sighed but couldn't help but cast a smile at her, her hickory ponytail bouncing as she took you over to connie.
connie was in the midst of talking to jean, who you recognized right off the bat, his ash brown hair scaping his neck, eyebrows lifting when he saw you approach with your friend. "connie— and jean, hey, jean. look who's here." connie glanced at you, then to sasha.
"i saw her earlier." he said, pausing from talking, his movements slowing. "but, hey again, _____." connie punched your shoulder lightly in a joking manner.
"well, i didn't," jean's hand rested on his chest as he spoke before pulling you into a hug moving the drink in his hand to the side as he did so, cheesing at you. "hey, _____. when did you get here?"
"when eren got here, if you've seen him."
jean's smile disappeared, an "oh," leaving his mouth blankly. "you look nice. how's everything?"
you stepped forward, closer to jean and connie as sasha left your side to go talk to the mystery boy. you grinned at the compliment, showing your appreciation. "thanks... i'm good, how about you?" you only really heard about jean through eren and sasha, also seeing him around campus more often than not. he was good company for the times you've been around him, but you and mikasa had to constantly get him out of scuffles with eren although they were pretty good friends.
"good, that's good. i'm good too. you're just now getting on the floor?"
"yeah, thanks to sasha. why? you wanna dance with me or something?" you joked, nudging jean's shoulder, earning a small laugh from connie as well that you could barely hear.
"jean you better watch it, this my girl." connie interrupted playfully, snaking his hand around your waist and pulling you closer in spite of jean. jean glared at connie before letting his drink run down his throat again, adam's apple bobbing.
"yeah, yeah, _____, wanna dance?" you complied, connie letting go of you and off to do his own thing as you came more up to jean, moving side to side with him as you mouthed the lyrics to the song. you relished in your movements, being able to loosen up and just dance, jean fluently following your movements as well, frequently mumbling the lyrics he knew. when granted you turned around letting your back hit jean's chest, his lip upturning as he looked down at you, watching you do your own thing. his free hand came down to your side to hold you in place as you danced, feeling the song playing. he studied your face from what he could see, noticing how carefree and relaxed you look. "looks like you needed a night out." he said loudly so you could hear.
"i guess. it's just nice to be able to see all of you at once, just letting myself live a little, especially since i don't get out a lot."
"you really don't. you should talk to sash more, have her bring you to some more parties or something like you used to always come to."
you bent over slightly, only so that you were no longer pressed flush against jean, letting your rear grind against him a bit. "you miss me? you can invite me out too you know, just depends if i'm feeling it that day or not."
"so you're asking me to text you more?" jean took your movements lightly, hand still resting at your side, his own body surprisingly cool albeit your actions, continuing to drink the beverage at hand.
you snorted picking yourself back up and adjusting your dress, swaying your hips once more. "jean kirschstein; always a flirt." jean and you both laughed, and he tapped your hip before gesturing towards the bar.
"you know it— but, i'm gonna get a refill, you enjoy yourself." jean began walking away, pep in his step and you chuckled to yourself, standing around until you took it upon yourself to find someone else you knew.
you walked slowly, looking for a familiar face, sasha almost nowhere to be found. you contemplated going back to the bar to sit down with hitch and annie again, or go converse with jean again, but you spotted armin wandering around almost aimlessly in the crowd as well, your face lighting up at the sight. "armin!" you called out, and thank goodness for his sharp ears, the blonde turning around almost immediately at the sound of his name. his smile was large and he came over,
"______!"
you brought armin into a side hug, a funny look on your face. "armin, hey. you looking for someone?" you asked, referring to his walking around just seconds before you called for him. the blonde scratched the back of his neck, nodding his head with a nervous laugh. "yeah, um... annie, i was looking for annie." your mouth dropped into an 'o', eyebrows lifting up in surprise. you remember eren foreshadowing that armin would be there for annie, and it made you giggle.
"annie?" you smirked, watching his eyes dart around the club, avoiding your eyes. "well, i think she's at the bar talking to hitch. want me to come with?" you weren't planning on grabbing another drink, as you could already feel some of the alcohol buzzing through, but you of course weren't drunk, and you needed it to stay that way.
you felt a hard slap of a hand on your shoulder, whipping your head back to see sasha all bugged eye standing behind you, a concerned expression crossing your face. armin, noticing the drift of your attention gave a curt nod. "no, it's fine, i'll find her." then walking off in the direction of the small bar.
"_____, guess what, guess what!" sasha exclaimed, turning you around by your shoulder, her cheeks high from smiling hard, face flushed from the countless drinks you assumed she must've had since you saw her, another one present in her hand as you spoke. you could only wonder who bought her it.
"hi, yes sash, what's up?"
"the guy— he's literally so cute, and guess what!" she repeated, eager to have you try to guess her next statement.
"um what? you got his number?"
she profusely shook her head, bangs whipping back and forth as she stabled herself on your shoulder, pulling down the dress she was wearing before leaning into your ear. "he can cook too, he told me he's a chef, i mean can you believe that? i don't even know if i want to take him home." she giggled before pulling away, eyes going up to the ceiling in thought. "i should probably get his number too, shouldn't i?"
"well if you're not gonna take him home then you should probably get that now."
"oh, no," her hand paused on your chest while she took a swig of the alcohol in hand. "i'm taking him home for sure, i just got to get the number too, he's so sweet!"
sasha's energy was a lot, her eyes darting around once more. "look, eren's coming over," she pointed with her drink behind you and you turned back to indeed see eren heading over to the two of you, his eyes pointed down at his feet as he watched his step around the excess bodies of sweaty people clashing around him, careful not to step on any feet. "i'm gonna go use the bathroom because i really have to pee, then i'm gonna get his number, ok?" sasha said, you saying an "okay," as she stumbled away to find the bathrooms.
just as she stepped away, eren stepped forward, him placing his hand on your lower back to push you more towards him and get you away from other people. "hey," he said in a louder tone for you to hear.
"hey." your feet moved with eren's as you noticed he was side stepping in an effort to dance less awkwardly, making you hold back a laugh.
"are you enjoying the party?"
"yeah, its nice. i've seen a lot of people so far."
eren peered down at you, eyeing you with another indecipherable look, his tongue sliding over his bottom lip and his eyes squinting slightly. he moved his hand to your side in effort to turn you around, leaning down to your ear. "enjoy yourself a little more, dance with me, i haven't seen you all night."
you looked at eren, his head near your ear causing the deviate hairs on the side of his head to tickle you. "i am... and that's your fault, you left me almost as soon as we got here."
eren ignored your last statement, pressing his palm to the dimples of your back. "lower." he droned, curiosity crossing his face as he wondered if you would comply or not, although he was just messing around.
"eren!" you slapped his arm, another foreign feeling coursing your skin as he tittered in your ear before pulling back.
"what? you're my bestfriend, i'm just messing, plus you'd be at like— my legs anyways." eren gave you a testing gaze, watching you lift a brow up at his slick words. with courage, you challenged eren, pushing back on him a little more, letting your backside brush against him in the slightest playfully. eren's hand stiffened on your side before he turned you back around.
"did you feel that in your legs?" you didn't think eren would take you seriously. you could play around with each other like that, and sometimes you did.
"woah, stop..." he let out a shaky laugh, it sounding more like a huff of breath. "uh, i'm gonna go head over for another drink... do you want one too? i'll pay." his voice came out almost in a pleading manner, but you shook your head brushing him off.
"it's cool, one of us has to stay sober— i wouldn't want you crashing zeke's car either, he'd kill you."
"whatever... but, you sure?"
"yes, i'm sure... i'm gonna go find somewhere to sit anyways, i'm kind of sick of standing."
"i told you your feet were gonna hurt."
"i didn't say they hurt, i said i was sick of standing, stupid. go get your drink." you pushed eren forward a little bit, him looking over you one more time before letting you go, heading in the direction of the same bar almost everyone you had encountered had sat at at least once today.
you wanted to find somewhere to sit, and it wasn't too hard, a broad seating area with small lounge couches and seating in the corner of the club, and sitting one of the couches was pieck, surveying the area, a peaceful expression on her face as she sat with porco. you mentally high fived yourself for spotting another one of your acquaintances, striding over, watching pieck's face practically glow at your arrival, porco not caring much. "pieck," you held your hands out, gesturing to the dark haired girl. "comes to a party, and lays down with porco for half of it."
"so you finally found me." was the first thing she said, intertwining one of her hands with yours and pulling you down to sit with her, laughing at you. "i was out there earlier, and now i'm drinking. pock here wouldn't even let me be out there for too long if i wanted too."
"and let those filthy hands touch you? damn right." he grumbled, arm swung around the back of the seat the three of you were seated on.
"see? pock; forever the life of the party." pieck mimics your earlier tone, using her hands to gesture out like you before the two of you burst into fits of laughter. "but, i saw you being the life of the party and dancing out there."
you scoffed. "barely, i danced with only a couple people, that's all."
"sasha, jean, eren." she leaned forward, bumping you with her hand that held her drink.
"why'd you say eren like that?"
pieck looked to porco, almost snorting at your obliviousness before looking back at you. "he was watching you when you were getting down with jean, then you kind of... got down with him too." her eyes got wide mockingly, before she giggled at her own words, downing some of her alcohol.
"barely," you said again. "i'm just friend's with both of them— and jean is just naturally flirty i guess. i'm just chilling, like you."
porco looked over at your last sentence, eyeing pieck with a muddled guise, her catching on before lightly rubbing his hand that sat on his thigh in security. "not chilling like that, pock, she means i'm just sitting around."
"i'm not stupid, i knew that."
another burst of short lived laughter from you and pieck, porco rolling his eyes at the two of your antics. "well eren and jean are over there now."
you glanced over at the direction of pieck's gaze, spotting eren seated beside armin and annie, and a new face you didn't even see all night, historia talking to eren with a black haired girl next to her, arms crossed. jean stood on the other side of them, leaning on the counter seeming to be listening intently. something seemed off about the conversation but eren seemed to be nonchalant about it so you didn't think twice. "so annie was still at the bar? i guess hitch left her." you said mostly to yourself, recalling when you told armin where the stoic girl was earlier that evening.
"yeah," pieck still heard you. "look at annie and armin," she used her drink to gesture towards the two.
"cute, almost makes me want to get in a relationship, surrounded by all these lovebirds." you said jokingly, specifically aiming your sentence to pieck and porco next to you, and not so much annie and armin as you weren't even sure if they dated.
"i could pluck a couple candidates for you."
"who?"
"i don't think you'd like my answer."
you shook your head at pieck, only letting the comment linger on your mind for a bit before letting your eyes wander back to historia and eren. they seemed to be having a heated conversation from the distance you were at, historia's drink in hand as she spoke to eren, her hands flailing at the same time while eren drank his own, seemingly half-listening. "was historia always here?"
pieck looked ahead to the bar as well. "i'm assuming you mean the blondie from this afternoon? i remember her, but i don't recall seeing her until probably just a couple minutes ago, why? you're gonna go over and say hi?"
"nah, she's a sweetheart though; she'd be happy to see me regardless, but, i think she might be a little annoyed with me because of what happened between her and eren. if i pass her later then yeah."
historia frowned as both her and you, despite your distance watched eren turn around to armin and jean, saying something that made jean burst out laughing and armin and the raven haired girl next to historia's jaw drop. what jean said after was inaudible from where you sat, but you could just see the words "eren," formed on armin's lip. your eyes widened as when eren turned back around historia's hand flew forward, drink wrapped around her fingers letting the contents inside of the cup spill forward onto eren's shirt, the red shade of the liquid seeping into it.
you gasped and pieck did too, her moving her hair out of her face to make sure the events that were splayed out were really happening. "oh my gosh," you muttered, standing up and taking long strides over to the bar.
armin's hand wrapped around eren's wrist, tugging him back before he could lose his temper on the small girl in front of him. "eren, leave it!" you could hear armin say, worry in his tone as eren shook out of his grip. but before he could do anything else in response you were in front of him, your eyebrows furrowed and your hands placed on the front of eren's shirt, avoiding the wet spots as you pushed him backwards a little.
"eren, hey, eren, stop!" you raised your voice slightly, his eyes still trained on historia who you stepped in front of, her stepping back, with the other girl, who you could now tell was mina, but you could only remember her so vaguely, hearing about her from eren more than seeing her more often than not.
eren looked down at you, his expression softening only a tad bit when he saw your own angered one as you tried to calm him down. you twisted your neck back to look at historia with a disappointed look, her looking almost surprised to see you here as well, as if she genuinely didn't know you'd be here. "historia..." you sighed more so to yourself before looking at eren's shirt again.
"_____, i can take him to the bathroom to help him." armin proposed, coming up beside you and examining eren's shirt as well. luckily because of the dark color it only looked like a water stain, but you knew it was irritating eren nonetheless.
"it's fine, i'll take him, thank you arm—"
"no, let's go, get your stuff." eren interrupted you, turning towards the barstool he was sitting on previously to grab his phone. his tone was low and domineering, almost telling you that yes, you were leaving right now, not that you had any complaints; you were already getting tired, hence why you took a seat with pieck.
"um, i left my stuff in the car, and i have my phone." you felt your chest to make sure your device was still tucked away, and it was, eren grabbing your upper arm and for the thousandth time that day, tugging you away. you could only look back with a sorry gaze at armin, noticing jean's still shocked expression, and realization dawning on historia's own face. you would have to shoot pieck a text later that night as well, as you could no longer see her as eren dragged you out the club.
once you took step outside the cold breeze hit your arm, but one of your arm's were still held captive so you couldn't rub your limbs to try and soothe the aching cold, getting annoyed by the way eren was pulling you along with him. "eren, let go." you pulled your arm back, and easier than you thought, your arm slipped out of his grip as the two of you reached the car. this time he didn't open the car door for you, both of you getting into your designated sides simultaneously, eren starting his brother's car again.
"what happened?" you asked almost immediately, eyes still looking down to the splotch of alcohol on his black top. you knew it would turn into a stain without the proper care of the material.
eren basically ignored you, looking over to your side once before beginning to drive off letting silence fall over the two of you. you huffed and looked out the window, resting your head on your palm and just letting eren's temper wash away with the car ride. you'd coerce him to tell you when the two of you got back to carla's house.
                                            彡
eren unlocked the front door, letting you get inside first. all the lights were shut, his mom most likely sleeping, yet the two of you were still quiet.
eren almost immediately began stripping off his shirt, first starting by placing both of his keys on the counter, alongside his phone, while you placed your own belongings beside his. he took off his tee, pendant slapping against his chest once the shirt was off. you used your right foot to kick off your left heel and did the same with the reciprocating leg.
before he could toss his shirt onto the table chair you reached out, grabbing it and going to flip on the kitchen light, heading over to the sink. eren studied your movements slightly surprised by your immediate efforts to help him, which to him should be no shock; you were always willing to help eren, always one step ahead of him before he could make mistakes, always rushing after him before his mistakes as well.
he came over beside you as you studied the stain, your delicate hands stretching out the fabric to examine it further. "what was she drinking?"
eren looked up from his shirt to your face, you too concentrated on the shirt to notice. "how am i supposed to know?" you gave him a browbeaten stare, him shifting uncomfortably before speaking again. "i don't know... it was something red i think."
"i'm gonna hand wash it and put it in the dryer. next time you wash clothes you can wash it too." you murmured, turning on the sink water before drizzling dish soap onto the black material. eren watched you silently, almost in awe at your domestic movements, your hands moving faintly yet firmly when you scrubbed at his shirt. he decided to break the silence instead of continuing to watch you.
"... i was just talking to armin and jean, and then she came over with her friend."
you immediately scoffed, breathing air through your nose at his last words, not even looking back at eren. "her friend? you know her name eren, i know you do."
eren stared at his shoes, tapping his fingers against the counter he leaned against. "yeah, mina. well they came over, and she was just talking to me like normal—"
"eren." your tone was almost threatening— like a mothers warning. you were glad he finally felt the need to tell you about the events that your mind was pondering on, but the way he sounded like he was attempting to dumb down the story itched you wrong. eren could tell by the tone of your voice that you were slightly upset, and he decided not to push any further.
"well she started talking to me about everything, her and mina were like... interrogating me about the situation, how i... played them," the words felt almost foreign coming from eren's mouth. you could almost see him visibly cringing from the angle he was at beside you. "and then i said something that she took the wrong way, i said it to jean and armin, then she threw her drink at me." the more he talked the lower his voice got until it was merely above a whisper, almost as if the embarrassment was only just dawning on him.
you let the quiet simmer for a little longer, ringing out the fabric in your hand before rolling up the material and making your way to the laundry room, eren following behind like a lost puppy. you brushed your hand against the laundry room door, turning to eren for confirmation that it was the right room if you could remember, and he nodded his head. with a sigh you threw the garment into the dryer, setting it to dry for only twenty minutes then letting the dryer run.
eren once again let his eyes follow you as you stepped in front of him crossing your arms, your brows coming together creating a crease between them, and your eyes squinted at him. "so why'd you do it?"
no response, only emeralds darting around the room to avoid your own strong gaze. you weren't angry, no, as cliché as it is you were merely disappointed— maybe even irritated, and of course confused.
"hm? what'd you get out of hurting them?" you stepped closer, eren making no attempt to step back.
"... i dont know, i—"
"you don't know? you just doing this for fun? cause it's not fun for them, and it's not fun for me when random girls always come up to me, like historia; telling me about what you did." you pointed an accusing finger at his chest. "like, i just don't get it eren." your hand came up to your face as you pinched the bridge of your nose.
eren was almost at loss for words, only being able to listen to you speak, and only able to observe the array of motions that came and went on your face in a single minute, observe how you tapped your foot against the hardwood floor, or the way you tucked your lip between your teeth in frustration every time you took a pause in telling him off.
"eren... i'm not saying she was right for throwing that drink on you, because she's not, but you," another brief pause, and your eyes meeting eren’s, a sympathetic look on them. okay, yeah you weren't mad, you just wanted to know what was going on through eren's head. "you can't keep just doing them girls like that, thinking that nobody's gonna bite back."
"______, i'm sorry..." he didn't want you to be disappointed, he didn't want you to be upset with him. it was some kind of heavy guilt that turned his stomach. he took it upon himself to grab one of your hands, and surprisingly you didn't pull away, his fingers rubbing your knuckles in an attempt to soothe your nerves. "'m sorry,"
"eren, you're apologizing to the wrong person." eren genuinely didn't know what to say, he knew you weren't the person to apologize to but he wanted your forgiveness as well. you let go of his hand moving it to the key around his neck, fiddling with it between your fingers as a mere distraction. he watched your soft fingers move, and it gave him a sense of comfort and fidelity, a warmness in his chest.
"i know..." his tone was filled with culpability, and it made you feel bad despite the position he put your friend in.
"you know, your mom talked to me earlier." you unconsciously slid your hand up his chest to his shoulder. your touch, your touch was enticing to him whether you knew it or not. "she said she wanted me to help you out and help you be the best version of yourself as possible." your other hand went on your hip to steady yourself further, but eren pulled it away and brought it to his other shoulder, you giving them a squeeze that made his stomach flip. "so that's what i'm trying to do, because that's what she wants, and because i love you."
eren practically choked when the words left your lips. not that he's never heard it from you before, no, being his best friend for so long it was such a casual thing to say 'i love you', and it was actually repeated more often than not. but now, why did it feel any different now? "i love you too..." he said hesitantly, bringing his own hands to your forearms, massaging the skin much like he did your thigh the previous morning. "you're not mad right?"
"no, if you can do better for me i won't be." truth being, he'd do anything for you. you let your hands glide up until you were cupping his face, giving his cheek a playful pat to show you weren't mad at him, then coming back down to tug at his chain, like his mom did earlier. "c'mon, let's go get changed."
and it hit him— he was awestruck.
it all made sense, fleeting touches he would give you, the way he relished in your skin on his, wanting you to be in his presence— better yet in his arms. the way your own touch on his; like you putting his necklace on for him, or you fixing his hair, how he would look at you in awe as you did so, how it gave him a sense of calmness. you were always looking out for him, and he didn't realize he was looking out for you too, always a protective grip on you, pulling him along with you, watching you from afar when he had the chance, searching for you when you've been away for too long. and you, when you would check on him, fix his attire, fix his necklace, taking after what you've learned from his mom just showed the mutual bond the two of you had, but the longer the bond stayed cordial, the longer he longed for you more. so when your hand slipped from his necklace and you began to walk around him he couldn't help but whine your name lowly and tug you back towards him, abruptly spinning you back around and letting his hands hold your jaw as he pressed his lips against yours, not considering the impact of the action in that brief moment.
you were caught off guard, the feeling of his full lips on yours felt oddly good, but it wasn't right— no it wasn't right at all to you, but to eren it felt completely right, like you were made for him, his other hand pulling you closer by your waist, the silk material of your dress underneath his hand making him squeeze tighter as if his hand would slip away.
you tried pulling away, and eren could feel it, your reluctance and your hands trying to push him away, but just a little longer, a little more, a little bit more time for his lips to engulf yours, until you both had to pull back for air, your nails leaving crescent moons on his chest from your efforts to push him away from you. he heaved, a croak of your name coming out as you shook your head despite the feeling of the kiss you shared sending the butterflies in your stomach abroad. "eren, no... i can't, you‚"
"no," he was desperate, his voice having that same pleading tone from when he asked you to get a drink with him at the bar. "it's not like that, this is different!"
your eyebrows pointed upwards, something in you did want to believe him but you couldn't. but then again, what would make him want to do that? when did he ever start finding you appealing? was it the kiss just now that made you realize that this wasn't the eren you always tried to take care of? that this wasn't eren jaeger whos ears would get red when his mom would tug on them, or who convinced her to paint his walls an ugly green, or the eren that'd kick you out of his room? this was eren, who grew his hair out to his shoulders, who joined a sports team and gained abs that rippled under his shirt which you finally noticed, eren who would make small sexual innuendos that probably had more lying underneath it than you thought.
this was eren that kissed you, and you kind of wanted to kiss him back.
"i promise." his lips were flushed, much like his face, small wispy hairs from the bun that would never stay put for too long swimming around his face. his palm still lingered on your waist but his other hand was now gripping one of your wrists on his chest. he never knew how to keep his hands to his self, and that only increased now. you didn't even realize he was inching closer, practically begging for more contact. "my mom would kill me if i played you anyways."
and so you let his lips collide with yours again, your mouths moving in synchronization this time around. eren's hands fumbled for the laundry room light before he tapped your thigh signaling you to wrap your legs around his waist. you knew his intentions but you still obliged. he shut the door and you wrapped your arms around his neck as he carried you to the kitchen light, doing the same as the previous room, him carrying you carefully in the dark, taking his time to get upstairs quietly with you in his arms until you both were in his room, him finally settling you down on the bed and turning on a dim lamp on his desk.
"shit," he mumbled watching you splay out in front of him, although your knees were touching as you laid back to hide yourself slightly while eren fumbled taking his shoes off. your dress was sliding up your thighs, and if you opened your legs you were sure eren would get a clear view of the cotton underwear you changed into that morning.
eren didn't want to be too hasty, he wanted to show you that this was gonna be about you and your pleasure, to show you that this wasn't another one of his flings and that you were important, you meant something to him but he just couldn't see it until now. so he towered over you, watching the way you bit your lip anxiously and it made his heart skip a beat, you were so cute, and he always knew so but the thought only audibly hit him now. he massaged your knees, one of his favorite soothing actions to do to you, until he slowly pulled them apart, feeling you tense up. "it's okay..."
so you moved along with him, and likewise, your dress slid up some more, eren pushing it up to your stomach, you lifting your hips to help him do so. he eyed you, making sure you were comfortable, and he couldn't help but lean down to kiss your lips once more, before pushing you further up the bed so he could lean over you. "you want this too, right?"
you nodded your head, letting out a shaky breath as his kisses trailed down your neck, eren using his arms to support himself as he leaned between your legs. you could feel the denim of his black jeans pressing up against you slightly and you clenched, your knees hitting eren's sides. "you gonna let me treat you right, make you feel good?" more kisses down your sternum, until they reached the cleavage of your breasts, eren looking up at you with those recognizable doe eyes, and you pulled his head back up, fingers brushing against his ears.
"yes, eren." his name, his name on your lips never sounded so nice.
eren turned his head sideways to kiss your palm before giving you a boyish smile then tugging at the straps of your dress. "want me to take this off?" he was so verbal, it made you feel so safe and secure. when you nodded your head he began to slowly pull the fabric off of you. he took his time, feeling every inch of your body, every curve beneath his hands, the softness of your flesh against his knuckles. he almost groaned out seeing your body almost bare in front of him. you were so pretty, it almost wasn't fair that it took him this much time to take action. "pretty." he spoke under his breath, but you heard it, and your hand slowly went to your mouth to hide your smile, your other one wrapping around your own waist to hide yourself, and eren caught on, moving your hands. "stop hiding, beautiful."
the compliments went right up your spine, your eyes fluttering as he skipped over your bra and let his kisses head down south, peppering your stomach in them. he let his fingers run up against your sides, eyes looking up to you for a second to make sure you were comfortable to where his hands and mouth were headed. eren's fingers dusted the waistband of your underwear, his teeth grazing the material as well before he pulled back, letting them snap against your skin, you hissing in response. "eren," you whined, feeling yourself grow even slicker from his onslaught.
"yes?" he said almost tauntingly. you could feel his hot breath over your lower abdomen, and you felt like you were being tickled. he decided to be a little slower, moving his hands to your thighs instead, rubbing at them, his fingers ghosting over your skin the closer he got to your heat, and when your mouth dropped open, the smallest moan came out of your mouth when he let his palm rest over you, he couldn't help but rut his length onto your thigh a little through his jeans.
when your legs spread more between him, he took it upon himself to go back down to the same position he was in, holding one of your legs apart by your knee while the other one attempted to pull your panties over your legs. eren was growing excited watching your hips lift up and your underwear fly across the room. his eyes were dark, hungry almost as he watched you try to close your legs again, but his hand was still holding them open as he stared at your glistening cunt. "damn," he breathed out shakily, jade eyes swapping between the view of your face staring at the ceiling in slight nervousness, and your pussy, sitting pretty in front of him, for him. "let me taste you."
you nodded your head almost too fast, and that urged eren on, him settling himself in between your legs. "you're so sexy," his thumb gave your clit a few test rubs watching your hips buck up slightly, and you could feel yourself pulse, aching for more contact, but eren was being painfully slow. he let his thumb drop down lower until it slide between your folds, gathering your slick on the digit, pride filling his body at how much coated his thumb. "you're so wet because of me." way to fill his ego. you rolled your eyes with a small chuckle that made him reciprocate, the childish smile returning on his face.
"stop..." you said, letting your hand fall to your stomach, the small moment of laughter making you a tad bit more comfortable. eren closed his eyes, pressing his tongue against your clit before flipping it and dragging it down to your entrance. before you could even buck your hips up his hand flew to your side, his fingers pressing into your skin, holding your hips in place, a whine leaving your lips that egged eren on. "fuck," the new sensation of his tongue on you, simply sitting on your hole had you wriggling underneath him. he opened his eyes to watch you, your head thrown back on your pillow, mouth agape your hand now kneading at your breast, bra pulled down around you waist, and eren couldn't help but smirk against your throbbing heat.
"you like that?" his lips moved against you and you visibly shuddered, causing eren to chuckle.
"yeah..."
eren pressed a kiss to your clit before finally letting his tongue slip into your hole, a small gasp eliciting from you as you felt yourself clench around the wet muscle. he audibly groaned, the way you tasted and felt around him making him tighten in his pants. he pushed his tongue in and out, relishing in each of your gasps and the moans you tried to hide. he pulled back for a brief moment, bringing his fingers up to spread your lips. "don't hold back, i wanna hear you." and he slid his tongue up your slit before sliding it back in, essentially tongue fucking you, your back arching as much as possible under his restraint.
"eren, fuck— more," you hissed. it felt almost teasing, you needed something bigger, something to fill you up and fuck you good, and the thought alone along with eren's tongue venturing inside of you made you even wetter, and eren could feel it, slurping at your juices. the vibrations made you yelp out, his grip on one side of your hips tightening while he readjusted his fingers in a v-shape to hold your lips apart.
eren gave you a small break, pulling back for a brief moment to let you calm down before gently sucking on your clit. he let his tongue sit on it then went back down, this time taking his index and sliding it into you, a drawled out moan leaving you. your eyes squeezed shut, and no— no, it still wasn't enough, but it felt so good.
eren smiled to himself, seeing you shaking in pleasure, knowing it was him doing so, and let his fingers do some work, kissing up your thighs then nibbling on the skin slightly, your other leg sliding up and down on the bed and your toes curling. he pecked kisses back down your thigh until his lips met your clit again, lapping at it lightly and letting the cold air hit it before pressing his open mouth against it and sucking, small hums of content leaving him.
"i can't," you could feel yourself throb as eren pumped his finger in and out of you, curling them to hit that sweet spot inside of you and you almost cried out, that familiar feeling of an overload of pleasure creeping up on you. "i'm gonna come," and god, did he want to feel you cream all on his mouth.
"gonna come for me?" eren added another finger, feeling you squeeze around him as he continued to thrust them into you, letting his lips come back to lick at your heat as he fingered you faster while his other hand trailed up and down your sides instead of holding them down. you let one of your hands come back down into eren's hair, finding a grip on the brown locks and pushing his head down further, eren humming in content, sucking harder for your pleasure.
"yes, eren, yes!" you blabbered, the heat in your lower abdomen twisting around as you grind against eren's face until your orgasm tumbled over you, your hips stuttering, back arching while eren slipped his fingers out, taking both of your thighs on either side of his head and helping you come down from your climax while he licked at you until you were back calm yet your breathing uneven.
eren pulled off of you with a pop, his eyes meeting yours, but you only looked for a split second before you let them go down to his lips, covered in your wetness, and he smiled, his tongue slipping over his top and bottom lip. "you taste good, that was good..." he climbed over top of you until his fingers were prodding at your lips, asking for entrance so he could have you taste yourself, and you complied, lips parting and his digits slipping in while your tongue swirled around them. he curved his fingers, pushing them further down your throat as far as possible before slipping them out and coming down to kiss you, the taste of you even more apparent as your mouths met. he slipped his tongue in, grabbing your jaw and kissing you fervently, tongues dancing together for a bit before he reluctantly pulled away, pressing his forehead against yours. "good job."
your hands made quick work of pulling off your bra completely despite the ache from keeping your legs apart while eren shifted backwards off the bed as you watched him unzip his jeans, pulling down his pants until he was left in grey boxers. he pulled those down too, his cock slapping against his lower abdomen without shame and you nearly drooled when he took it in his hand, rubbing up and down the length while coming back over to his bed. you grabbed eren's hand, trying to keep your eyes off of his length making him let out a low laugh. "you scared?" he joked as you brought him down next to you.
"shut up— no, i'm not." your hands moved to his chest pushing him down to his pillows but eren sat back up, placing his own hands over yours.
"woah, it's okay, you don't have to." he realized you wanted to suck him off, but he didn't want to make it about him tonight as to not give you any ideas that any of this was temporary. he wanted to take it easy and pleasure you like he just did, make you feel good, and make you cry out his name, not vice versa. "you lay down." eren flipped the two of you, until you were back underneath him, and he took it upon himself to rub your breast, letting his thumb and index twirl one of your nipples between his fingers. his mouth came in contact with your other boob, talented tongue going to work at your reciprocating nipple for a brief moment before pulling back. "i don't know if i have a condom."
you glance up at eren, a frown forming on your face. you knew he messed around a lot and that somewhat worried you. "you don't have condoms here or something?" your eyes darted around his room.
"it's my mom's house, no i don't have condoms." eren was growing impatient, precum visibly leaking out his tip so he took it upon himself to smooth it down his length while he thought. "i'm clean though, i swear." he added. "i haven't had sex in a couple weeks either." you gave eren a wary look. "i'm not lying."
with a roll of your eyes you nodded your head and shifted around, but eren stopped you halfway, hand pulling your hip back down to the bed. "nah, i want to see your face, gorgeous." just as fast as he slipped out of his alluring mood, he slipped back into it and your lip twitched as his hand ran down your side until it was back at your thigh, eren pulling your leg further from the other. he looked down to position himself in front of you, mouth in an 'o' shape at the sight in front of him. he was about to fuck you, and fuck you so good. "you ready?"
"mhm."
so eren slid himself inside of you, both of you groaning simultaneously until he was buried at the hilt— and this is what you longed for. you felt so full and it felt so nice, the way he stretched you out was indescribable and your mouth hung open, small gasps coming out as your hand gripped at eren's forearm near your head. "fuck, you okay?"
albeit your eyes being squeezed shut and eren feeling like he was splitting you open, you nodded your head hastily, nails digging more into his skin. it had been awhile since you had sex yourself, so the feeling almost felt like your first again. "yeah... you're just, so— big..." you managed to breathe out. you should've kept your mouth shut, you could practically see eren's ego inflate, his lip twitching trying to suppress his smile.
he brought his palm to your face, smoothing over the skin with his thumb. "yeah? well you're so tight," eren pushed a little further until his tip was brushing your cervix, then his body coming back a little bit until his head was a distance above your pussy, collecting spit in the front of his mouth before letting it slowly drop down onto your clit, rubbing it in to soothe you further as he pulled out a bit, tantalizingly slow. "i'll go slow at first."
eren pushed in and out slowly like he promised, but it didn't last for long, his pace quickening fast, but luckily he continued to rub you in circular motions to help ease the pain until it melted into pleasure. "can't believe you're letting me fuck this pretty pussy of yours." he groaned out, his hips rocking against yours.
the way you wrapped around him, squeezing him impossibly tight wasn't fair. you felt exactly how he thought you would, maybe even better, and every thrust of him inside you had him holding back more and more. "shit, _____." his voice came out in a whimper, and his elbows were brought down to the bed while your legs wrapped around his waist in an attempt to pull him closer.
for you, the sensation was incredible, the way he pulled out just before he was no longer inside of you, then pushed in until you could feel him against your cervix, every time he hit it pleasure shooting up inside of you. it had your skin feeling tingly and your hands flying to grip at the sheets, small wails of pure euphoria coming out of you and edging eren on. "eren," you cried as his teeth began to nibble on your neck, sucking on it as well in efforts to mark you. his necklace sat cold against your chest as he sucked on your neck and increased your pleasure.
"yeah, i love hearing my name from you like that, say it again." he almost demanded, pumping into you harder, your body rocking on top of the bed with every time eren slammed his hips into yours, your wetness collecting on his pelvis. "again," he popped off from your neck watching the skin slowly darken, and he knew there'd be a hickey soon enough.
"eren!" you whimpered, rolling your own hips down into his, eren supporting himself on his arms again, bringing one up to wrap around your neck, giving a test squeeze. "fuck..." you choked out as he tightened his grip, almost surprised at the fact that you weren't trying to push his hand away. his fingers tapped against your neck before he pressed harder, coming down to kiss you again, tongue licking at your bottom lip, your breathing shortening from the lack of oxygen coming in or out. he pulled at your lip before making every thrust of his powerful, pulling out slow then coming back in strong.
"so you like when i choke you like that?" he mumbled against your lips before pressing his against your jaw. "you're so dirty... never thought you'd be like that." and finally he let you take in air, palm moving from your neck to your breast, giving it a nice squeeze.
eren lift your hips up a little bit so he could find that spot inside of you— and when he finally hit it you all but screamed, his hand slapping over your mouth and eren's eyes widening. "shut the fuck up!" his tone serious, as you forgot that his mom was only rooms over. you gave him a sympathetic look in apologies as he slid his hand from your mouth.
"'m sorry, but you feel so good..." you pouted trying to kiss him up in excuse. it had to have worked the way eren leaned forward so he could brush against your sweet spot again, this time you gasping.
"yeah? i feel so good?" he repeated.
"yeah."
"'atta girl," you were consumed in ecstasy, the praise, the stimulation, the feeling of his pendant against your skin, everything was surrounding you and that familiar feeling of your orgasm approaching began climbing again, you just needed a little more. "taking this dick like that— and liking it too." eren unwrapped your legs from his waist, his pace speeding up again. "i bet you want me to fuck you like this more often."
you groaned, your hand snaking down to rub at your clit again, and only after a couple rubs were you seeing stars, your back arching again, every nerve in your body being pinched as you came all over eren. a cry of his name came out over and over again and your eyes rolled to the back of your head.
he didn't stop, no, he was close himself, and the way you were pulsing around him as if you were trying to milk him was helping him to his end. your body went almost limp as you let eren finish. "fuck, fuck, i'm almost there too," he bucked his hips into you a few more times before pulling out and letting his hand finish him off, rubbing himself profusely until spurts of white came out flying onto your chest and stomach. "shit." he panted, and you were too, your breathing unstable, chest rising up and down after your orgasm. "shit."
eren rolled over until he was laid down beside you, your eyes struggling to stay open. eren let his rake over you, from the mark on your neck, to his cum splattered on your midsection, to the small sheen of sweat that covered yours and his body, causing some of his flyaways to stick to his forehead. he sighed in content before getting up to go grab a rag to clean you up.
"don't go to sleep yet." he said as he wiped and cleaned you up with a damp rag, cleaning himself off as well.
"why?" you mumbled with your eyes closed as you turned around so your face smushed against eren's pillow.
eren grabbed his boxers slipping them back on and contemplated handing you your underwear as well or letting you stay comfortable. seeing you wake up bare would cause a problem for him that he didn't want to deal with so he grabbed your underwear and helped slipped them on you, then rummaging through his bag for one of his shirts. "come on, let me put this on you." you reluctantly obliged, picking yourself up from his pillow and lifting your arms so he could slip his shirt over your head before climbing into his bed next to you, pulling you flush against him.
"you okay... was that okay?" there he went, checking up on you.
"yeah, you okay?" and there you went, doing the same.
"yeah... that was real good," eren kissed the top of your head. "i meant it when i said this is different." he rubbed your back, pulling you even closer, his legs tangling with yours as the two of you cuddled under the covers. it didn't feel as wrong to you anymore. a little weird? yes, but his words were reassuring. "i want something with you... i do. you do so much for me, we're always together, my mom loves you— i love you... i don't know, i just wanna be with you."
your heart was pounding in your chest, even through your tiredness. "can you show me you can be better first? work for me?" you didn't want to just hand yourself to eren that easy. "i want you to show me how much you love and care for me. get yourself together, settle down, then i guess you can settle down with me later."
"later?" it pang eren's heart a bit that he wouldn't be able to call you his just yet, but he was determined to do what it would take to get you.
"later."
                                           彡
"_____, wake up, my mom made breakfast." your eyes opened slowly at the sound of eren's voice. you turned over to see him dressed, sweatpants and a shirt on his body, hair slightly damp from what appeared to be a recent shower. "get ready, i'll wait."
with hesitance, you got up and got yourself cleaned up and ready. you threw on some leggings and a sweatshirt as you didn't recall any plans with eren nor his mom that evening, and with that you and eren head downstairs, eren's hand holding yours as he pulled you down, but he didn't drop contact with you when the two of you got into the kitchen. instead of holding your hand, he hopped up on the kitchen counter pulling you between his legs where you stood.
"good morning, when did you two come home last night?" carla asked from her position at the stove, flipping a pancake before grabbing three plates from the cabinet next to her and then turning around to face the two of you. neither you or eren missed the suspicious glance she gave you when she saw your stances, holding back her question so you could answer hers.
"probably around twelve... we left early." you said.
"i thought so, i heard something last night but i remembered it was probably just the two of you so i went back to sleep." carla slipped the last pancake onto the stack then handed eren the three plates to place on the kitchen table. "am i missing something?" she said giving you two a one over as she gave him the plates.
"no. there's three people and three plates." eren said as he placed them onto the table, and you rolled your eyes at his stupidity.
"no, like... you guys seem comfortable today." realization hit him as he turned around to his mom trying to hide his stupid grin, which told you to not let him speak.
"uh, me and eren talked yesterday." carla raised an eyebrow at you as she walked past you to put the stack of pancakes on the table, you following behind her to take a seat.
"about?"
eren glanced at you then to his mom as she brought over a container of syrup and some forks and knives. "i'm trying to make _____ my girlfriend." he said blatanly, watching his mom freeze up as she put a fork and knife beside your plate.
"really?"
"yeah... he is." you couldn't decipher her reaction, until a small smile appeared on her face as she pat your shoulder and took a seat with you and eren.
"i'm glad." she hummed. "it took you guys long enough... but why is he trying?"
you avoided carla's eyes, concentrating on pulling a pancake to your plate as eren seemed nonchalant about the whole ordeal. it was his mom, so of course he'd be less nervous about it than you.
"i told him i wanted him to get some things together first."
carla nodded in understanding as she began cutting her pancakes. "i see. that's good, just let me know if anything okay?"
"okay." you and eren said the same time causing carla to giggle.
"i'm talking to _____ not you." her tone had a hint of excitement to it.
she was happy, and something inside you was too.
you weren't sure if eren getting a drink spilled on him was karma or luck.
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oceans-goddess · 3 years ago
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Birthday Present
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“Hey, Newt?” Gally asked in a low tone. Dinner had just ended, and everyone was on their way to bed.
“What’s up?”
“I was wondering if I could ask you a favor.”
* * *
“Wait! Y/N, I need your help with one more thing before dinner,” Newt called. Sighing, I turned around. The fields were never this much work, but Newt had been giving me random jobs all week. Yesterday, he’d asked me to count all the bugs I found near the vegetables. “We need to know what kind of pests we are dealing with!” Had been his response when I asked him why he’d given me such a ridiculous task.
“What do you need?” I asked hesitantly.
“Can you...uhh... would you mind just... organizing the tool shed? It’s become an absolute mess in there,” Newt said, fumbling through his words the entire time.
“Do you think maybe I could do it tomorrow? I was gonna take a walk before dinner-“
“No!”
My eyes widened at his response, and, surprisingly, his did too.
“Well, Y/N, I just wouldn’t... wouldn’t want you to do a boring old job like that on your birthday! Best if you do it today. You’ll have plenty of time to chill tomorrow!”
It had been almost one year since I’d arrived in the glade, and in that time I had met such amazing people. Most importantly, I had met Gally. I remember the first day he’d asked to go on a walk with me— I’d been working in the garden. As I was pulling some weeds, he had called out from behind me: “Need a break?”
I smiled at the memory. That had been around nine months ago. The two of us had made so many memories since, but, come to think of it, he hadn’t said anything about my birthday coming up at all yet. Maybe he’d forgotten, I thought, and my mood turned a bit sour.
I nodded silently and walked over to the tool shed to get started.
* * *
That night at dinner, Gally was nowhere to be found. He was usually the one I went to when I felt upset, but now that it was him I was upset with, my frustration grew. I sat silently as my friends ate dinner.
“Hey, Y/N, you alright?” Minho asked from beside me. I looked at him. He was leaning in my direction with a concerned look on his face.
“Yeah, um, I’m fine. Just tired. Have you seen Gally at all today?” I asked, but I knew what the answer would be, because Minho had just gotten back from the maze.
“Nah, sorry, the runners got back just before dinner. I haven’t seen anyone who isn’t in this room right now.” I nodded, and we went back to our meal.
* * *
“Happy birthday, dear Y/N, happy birthday to youuuuu!” my friends sang, and I smiled down at the birthday stack of pancakes Frypan had whipped up for me that morning.
“Thanks, guys, this is perfect,” I said with a grin, but it was a lie. I still hadn’t seen Gally at all, and when I asked the other builders where he’d been, they said he was busy working on a project and needed to spend more time on it than usual.
How could he blow me off to work on a job he does every day? I thought to myself as I stalked over to the fields for another long day. As I walked past the beanstalks, I spotted Gally and Newt whispering together.
So he’d had time to talk to Newt today, but not me?
“Hey, babe,” Gally said with a smile when he noticed me. After a moment’s hesitation, I showed him a quick smile.
“Can you come with me for a bit? I need your help with something,” Gally asked, and at that, I rolled my eyes.
“You want me to help you? I haven’t seen you at all in like two days. You didn’t wanna let me know you’d be too busy to even talk to me? And now you expect my help? What the fuck, Gally?”
By the time I was done berating him, Newt had backed away and was looking for some busywork to stay out of the conversation. Gally’s eyes were wide, and he looked flustered before mustering up a short laugh.
“Babe, I’m sorry. I wasn’t ignoring you, I’ve just been super busy-“
“Busy? Are you serious?” I asked. I refused to say anymore for fear that I’d start tearing up. Gally grabbed my hand.
“Y/N, please, I promise I’ll make it up to you, but you need to come with me right now.” His eyes were pleading, but when I didn’t come immediately, he leaned in and kissed me on the forehead.
“Please, babe. Just come with me. I promise, you won’t regret it.”
* * *
“We are almost there,” Gally said, pulling me by the hand through the woods. I didn’t respond. I was glad we were here— this was my favorite place to be in all of the Glade. But I usually came alone when I needed some space from everyone. Now, I felt like I couldn’t relax.
How could he have forgotten my birthday when everyone else had remembered?
“Alright, here it is!” Gally said, and he pointed up toward the canopy of the forest. My eyes followed his hand, and sitting in a large tree above us was a small treehouse with a ladder attached.
“What is this?” I asked in a small voice. Gally put his arm around my waist, kissed my cheek, and said, “Happy birthday, Y/N.” I gasped and looked up at him.
“You built this for me?” I asked, and he smiled proudly.
“Oh my gosh— this is amazing!” I said, my mood completely shifting.
“Wait— how long have you been building this for? I come in here all the time,” I wondered aloud.
“Well... I’ve been working on it all week. I had to make sure you wouldn’t come in and see it before it was ready, though...” he trailed off sheepishly.
“Wait...” I began. “You’re the reason why Newt has been making me work overtime all week?” The blond smiled guiltily. I scoffed and shoved his shoulder playfully.
“Well, you spend a lot of time in here, so I thought I’d give you a comfy little spot to hang out in. I’m sorry I haven’t been around to spend time with you in a couple days, and for Newt, I just wanted to finish it in time to show you.”
At that, I really did tear up.
“Gally?” I began, looking up at my gift.
“Yes? Do you wanna go up and see it?” He asked excitedly.
“I love you so much,” I whispered, and he laughed.
“I love you too, babe. C’mon, I want you to see inside!”
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strangelysamantha · 3 years ago
Text
bittersweet ☆
possessive!rafe x plus!sized reader.
warnings: crazy rafe, possessive and obsessive behavior, swearing, underage drinking, reader gets hurt, physical fight, ect.
words: 2,167.
summary: you went to a local party by the beach when rafes unstable side peeked out. jj maybank finds you alone, and decides to talk to you. rafe gets possessive and upset, thinking that jj was hitting on you.
request?: no :)
a/n: i’m working on requests but since my computer is down it’s taking longer because i hate typing on my phone especially because tumblr always deletes what i’ve written. i’m hopeful that my computer will be fixed by tomorrow, until then i’ll try and produce a few stories since i’ve been MIA for a few days. remember to like and comment if you enjoy this! <3
my masterlist
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“please just come with me.” rafe frowned as he sat on your porch pleading to you, telling you why you should go to a beach party with him. “why rafe?” you frown, not in a partying mood. instead, you would much rather stay home and do a movie marathon. “please baby, i swear i’ll make it up to you.” you roll your eyes at his begging. “fine, but only because you are so cute.” his eyes sparkle as a smile lifts on his lips, you pull him into a quick kiss.
you walk back inside to get dressed for the bonfire. rafe was wearing blue and orange, and you wanted to match him. so, you grabbed a pair of dark blue ripped jean shorts, and an orange v-neck. you apply some perfume and jewelry before putting on some shoes. just as you were finishing up, rafe walked into your room smirking. “awh, you wanted to match with me.” he smiled. despite you knowing his look was filled with adoration you couldn’t help but feel uncomfortable under his long glance. “obviously, don’t you want people to know i’m yours?” you question him, waiting for his response. “well, matching clothes won’t change anything. everyone already knows.” you nod smiling before pulling him into a kiss.
once you pull away from the kiss, he grabs your hand and leads you to the car as he drives to the beach. his hand finding its way on your thigh; gripping it tightly. while he drove to the beach, you paid close attention to your phone, checking social media for any major updates. rafes grasp on your thigh loosened as the car came to a halt. you were parked on the beach, the sun was already setting.
you both exit the car, rafe swiftly moving from his side of the car to yours. “thank you for coming with me.” his hand finds yours, pulling them together. “of course, i love hanging out with you.” he lets go of your hand, and moves his arm to hold closely around your waist. the two of you begin to walk towards the already drunken teen filled beach.
you frown at the amount of trash that litters the sand. you stay close to rafe, as he approaches topper and kelce. “hey guys.” you say to them to make conversation. they nod in your direction, acknowledging you before their attention turns towards rafe again. you don’t pay any mind to what the boys are discussing. after a while you become bored, so you slowly slip out of rafes arm to go get a drink. “i’m going to go get a drink, do you want one?” you ask rafe, and he glances at you smiling. “yes please, thanks baby.” you lean in for a quick kiss before leaving to go get drinks. you weren’t a heavy drinker, always scared of what you would say or do under the influence, so you grab yourself a water and grab a beer for rafe.
you return to the spot you were in earlier, but it’s now vacant. rafe, topper, and kelce all leaving you behind. you frown, looking around for them but coming up short. you had no idea where they could be since this beach was huge. you don’t bother wasting your time looking for them, instead you start to head for the bonfire.
you weren’t surprised that rafe had left you all alone. this always happened. he would beg you to go to something, just to abandon you half way through it. it didn’t bother you, it just worried you, scared of what he was doing without you.
once you arrived at the bonfire, you decided to down the drink once made for rafe, the beer stinging your throat. you drank three more chugs before drinking water as well. it doesn’t take long for the alcohol to come into effect. you knew it had clouded your judgement when you were laughing at jj maybanks jokes of all people. “i’m telling you, these people were fucking crazy.” you giggled as he made exaggerated reactions. “you’re telling me! that sounds scary as fuck. i wouldn’t have survived.” he shook his head looking down at you, “i’m sure you would have figured something out.” you nod at him.
“have you seen those dudes since?” you ask, intrigued by his story. “actually, yeah. their story isn’t the brightest… sheriff told me that they-” his voice cut off as he made a slicing noise above his throat. your eyes widened in shock. “oh my god! really??” you grab his arm, “what if they came back for you! bro no way…” your heart rate quickens at the thought of evil men chasing random kids. “no, i know right, scary as shit. i guess it’s bittersweet because they died, but now they aren’t after us anymore.” he shrugs, sipping his red solo cup. “i guess. it’s still scary. so many people are unexpectedly dying nowadays, i definitely-” you were interrupted as rafe put an arm around you, eyeing jj up and down.
“continue baby, what were you saying?” rafe asked, smiling at you for a split second before it disappeared when his eyes focused on jj again. “oh we were just talking about bad men, and how this town is scarier than it used to be.” he nods at you. “jj what are you doing talking to my girl?” jj stands up straighter, “why do you care? do you own her or something?” rafe scoffed, “yes.” the confusion on your face was evident and jj was quick on acknowledging it. “oh really? by the look on her face, she doesn’t agree.” he glances at you, but you have quickly recovered. “what are you talking about maybank?” you interrupted the two immediately not wanting a fight to break out. “i was just talking to jj because he had a funny story. it wasn’t anything like that, i swear babe.” you words slurred together and it was evident you weren’t in the right headspace.
rafes eyes widened as he fully realized that you were so intoxicated that you had no idea what was going on, “what the fuck maybank? you got her drunk for what? you trying to fuck her?” jj couldn’t believe rafes nerve. “one, she was drunk when she came up to me, and two, i don’t need to fuck her, i already have.” your heart dropped at jj's confession.
“maybank, do you want to take that back?” you could tell rafe was trying to give jj a chance to redeem himself before all hell breaks loose. your hand tightened on rafes bicep trying to get him to move on, but he wouldn’t budge. “can't take back what’s already happened.” jj shrugged again, smirking.
rafe was the first one to throw a punch, you stumbled back as he had pushed you away. with your luck, your head had landed right against the beverage table, scratching the side of your face from your temple to the side of your cheek. you hiss in pain, moving your fingers to feel it. when you retreat your hand you see it covered in blood. you groan in pain, hissing as the cool air makes it sting.
you clumsy stand up, looking ahead to see rafe and jj were still fighting. “rafe!” you weakly call out, but he was stuck in his own little bubble as he pounded his fists against jjs face. you stumble away, walking far from the beach. you were too tired to even try to process what was going on. the yelling behind you quietly faded as you made your way farther along the beach.
not even a minute later you hear rafe running after you. “what rafe?” you ask, but your back is still turned to him. “baby, please just- i’m sorry okay. i, i don’t know. i was just scared he’d take you from me. i don’t want to lose you, you are all i have. you mean too much to me for some pogue to take.” his rambling only pissed you off more. “rafe, please. i have a headache, all i want is to go home.” you frown.
his eyes moved from the sand up to your face, surprised by the huge gash on your face that was oozing blood. “baby?! who did this to you?” you couldn’t contain your anger any longer. you used all your strength, pushing his shoulders back. “you did! you fucking asshole.” the fact that he didn’t even budge from the push you sent his way, pissed you off even more. “baby, i, you know i would never do anything to intentionally hurt you?” your silence only scared him even more.
“baby, i wouldn’t- i didn’t mean to hurt you.” his breathing was heavy as the realization hit him. he had undeniably hurt you, and he had undoubtedly lost you. “no, because this can’t be happening. i can't lose you. baby, i- it was an accident. please, you gotta understand i didn’t want to hurt you, it was just jj fucking all over you, and the way he tried to claim you, saying he already had you, it just- the anger i couldn’t even hold myself back.” you nod at his words. “rafe i understand that. i, just. i don’t want this. do you think i want you to assault every guy who even looks at me? it makes me feel like shit. do you know how shitty it makes me feel? that you think i would chose anyone else when i have you. it hurts to know that you think i’m not loyal enough.” you frown, tears easily falling out of your eyes.
“baby- it’s not you i’m worried about.” you nod, “i know… it just doesn’t feel that way.” he goes to speak again but you quickly interrupt him. “can we please continue this at your house? my head seriously hurts.” his eyes soften, his hand cupping your cheek. he hesitated before he pulled you into a kiss, when you kissed him back he could feel his smile come back. “rafe.” you say again, before pointing to your head. “right baby, i’m sorry. let's go.” you nod.
he walks you to his car, opening the door for you before you hop in. he puts your seatbelt on for you. his protective side shining through once again. he walks around, before hopping in himself. he starts the car. “seatbelt…?.” you question. he laughs quietly. “of course, baby.” you nod as he puts his seatbelt on. his hand reached for your thigh again, before he drove the two of you to his house.
when you arrived, your head was pounding. you could feel it throbbing, the blood dripping onto your orange v neck. you frown at the sight. the two of you walk inside, and he immediately pulls you into his room, placing you on the edge of his bed. he runs to his bathroom grabbing a table cloth and the first aid kit.
he opens the first aid kit, placing it beside you. he takes the wet washcloth, wiping away the blood. after cleaning it, he added antibacterial cream, and then covered it in gauze. he kissed the bandage covering it before walking to his closet.
“here. wear this, and i’ll wash your t-shirt.” you nod, “thank you rafe.” he turns around and you swiftly change your t-shirt. he turns around, his heart hammering inside his chest, still scared about where you stood.
“rafe. i don’t want to lose you. i love you a lot, but i don’t want to continue this if every time a guy looks at me funny, you beat him up. i appreciate you protecting me, but they aren’t worth it.” he nods, soaking up every word. “if you can promise me that you won’t fight random people anymore, then i think we can work this out, and work through this.” he smiles softly, “is that a deal?” you ask. “of course baby. i promise i won’t fight anyone unless they really deserve it.” you roll your eyes, “fine. that’s good enough; but please, let’s hope it doesn’t get too bad.” he laughs, “let’s hope.” you grab his hands, realizing they were quite bruised. “let’s ice these.” he follows you to the kitchen, as you prepare an ice pack.
once the ice pack is ready, you place it on one hand, the other is intently grabbing your thigh. “baby you don’t have to do all this.” he reached for the ice and you lightly pushed his hand away. “you fixed me up, let me fix you up.” he sat back and watched as you cared for his bruises. rafe was glad he didn’t lose you, and he was glad you were still there with him. having you so close to him made him realize he couldn’t sacrifice anything to lose you. he kissed your bandages once more before you two prepared for bed and started to comfortably cuddle together.
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user21340 · 4 years ago
Text
the world in her arms
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(i don’t own this gif or characters used in this fic)
pairing: natasha romanoff x fem!reader
summary: you and natasha have always had quite a flirty and sarcastic relationship. both of you develop feelings for one another but you both are clueless to what the other feels until nat gets jealous and says something hurtful to you. will you make up (or out)?
warnings: minor angst, fluff, swearing, and a mention of death.
word count: 2.1k
a/n: omg thank you so much for 57 followers love you all 💕. sorry for the lack of content i didn’t know what to write and had almost no new ideas. also i’m a youngin and worked my first 8 hr day yesterday so your girl was exhausted and i have finals coming up soon. k thank you for coming to my ted talk, enjoy!
also this song doesn’t relate to the story at all but it’s underrated imo and also sorry for the weird pov changes throughout the story.
“Hey y/l/n! Where are you headed?” Natasha yells from the kitchen while I’m standing in the living room on our shared floor.
“Wouldn’t you like to know Nat.” I say with a smirk.
“Yeah matter of fact I would.” she retorts.
“Chill, I’m just headed to train some recruits with Clint. But don’t miss me too much, I'll be back in a few hours, Natty.” You blow a kiss her way, and she just rolls her eyes partially from the kiss and the use of her nickname but you see a faint pink tint sitting atop of her cheeks before she turns away.
I’ve been training these recruits with Clint for a couple hours and my session is nearing an end. Something I’ve picked up on today is how touchy and how dumb these recruits are acting just for me to correct their form. I don’t have time for this shit I think as this girl has me correct her jab form for what has to be the fifth time this hour.
Non readers pov
Natasha actually does start to miss you because of how bored she is due to the larger training room being occupied for these recruits. She heads down to see if you are wrapping up yet and see if you’d like to grab dinner with her somewhere. She arrives at the training room and heads to the back room where there is a large one way mirror. Natasha, having nothing better to do, watches Clint and yourself interact with these seemingly clueless recruits.
Minutes pass and Natasha honestly likes seeing your frustration every time a recruit asks you a stupid question or something you’d already answered for the hundredth time this session. That is until she sees this handsy recruit keep asking you to correct your form which she sees you fake a smile at and happily correct it. As if Natasha isn’t jealous already she sees you release a genuine large laugh at something a recruit says. Not being able to withstand witnessing anymore of this behavior from you directed towards anyone else except her. Natasha then storms off into the living room.
Readers pov
I was nearing the end of this session when a recruit comes up behind me and asks, “Soooo, is it true that you and Clint are like a thing?” he asks with no trace of humor or sarcasm on his face. I just bust out laughing because one, everyone or at least almost everyone who knows about The Avengers knows that I’m 100% only interested in women and two, CLINT? I mean he is a great guy and all but I’ll never forget the time I went into a diner to have breakfast with him and the waitress assumed he was my grandfather.
twenty long minutes later...
The living room is lively and everyone seems to strike up a conversation with one another. I decide to strike up a conversation with Natasha who is weirdly acting cold all of a sudden.
“Oh my god! You know what I just remembered the other day? My mom used to-“
“Shut up, y/n/n. I don’t care and I don’t think anyone does at the moment.” she exclaims with a small smirk thinking you’ll detect her harsh-morbid sarcasm.
“Oh.” you choke out, “It’s getting pretty late I-I better head to bed” my voice cracks as I mutter a small, ‘asshole’ agony laced in my voice blinking the hot tears away. I start walking towards my room but it slowly turns into a jog, then sprint. Anything to get to my room and release my sadness.
Non readers pov
The room is frozen. Everyone is staring at Natasha.
“I care.” Wanda states heading to your room because she knows you shouldn’t be alone right now.
“Jesus Nat, that was awful. You know you’ve fucked you when even I say it’s bad. Poor girl’s mom passed when she was around 10.” Tony deadpans.
“Oh my god, what have I done?” Nat says burying her head into her hands.
“I’m not too sure how you’re gonna get out of this one Nat, but you’ve gotta fix this.” Sam says.
Wanda reaches your room and hears loud yet muffled sobs while standing in the hallway. She can feel your grief rippling through her body. The only heartache she can relate to is the moment she lost Pietro which is more than an average person should feel. She knocks on the door softly yet hard enough to alert you of her presence.
Readers pov
I hear three soft knocks on the door. I quickly silence my cries and assume it is Nat. I then clear my throat as the knocking continues and muster up enough energy to speak,
“Go away” into my pillow loudly. The knocking stops but I don’t hear anyone walk away just yet.
“Y/n/n, it’s Wanda. Can you let me in please, so we can talk?” she asks, I stand up while groaning and walk towards the door. I unlock it and open it just a crack to make sure she is alone and not with a certain someone. It is pretty short-lived as Wanda pushes the door open the rest of the way.
“Oh hon, I’m sorry.” She says as she wraps me into a tight hug after closing the door behind her. I crumble into her embrace as she rubs small circles on my back. Wanda has always been such a calming figure in my life since I met her, a major part being that she can feel almost all of my anxieties that try to drown me throughout a day. She also knows how it feels to be alone which allows her to relate to my feelings, so she knows just how much missing someone who is gone for eternity hurts.
We hug for what feels like minutes but when I take a quick glance outside my window it is dark out.
“Is it true?” I rasp.
“What?” she counters.
“Y’know that no one cares. All I wanted to do was share a memory that I remembered of myself with my mom and as you know it isn’t too often that I remember these types of things and when I do I love sharing them, so she won’t ever be forgotten. It just hurts so much to be shut down talking about something you truly care about by someone you care about.” I explain while Wanda looks at me with the softest eyes I’ve ever seen while nodding her head slightly.
“Now that is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard. I care and everyone in this compound cares about what you have to say as well as what you are feeling. You know how Natasha can be sometimes with the insensitive comments she makes before realizing what she’s doing.”
“I know but that doesn’t give her the right to j-just say stuff like that. I get how full our relationship is with banter and sarcastic comments but I really thought she was starting to like me.” I frown as Wanda just nods. That’s when exhaustion hits me like a truck.
“Wands, before I ask you this just know you can decline.” I give her a minute to protest, but she says nothing. ” Can you sleep with me?” Wanda’s eyes widen,
”Y/n/n I don’t think that is a good id-“ I realize what I just said and cut her off before things get even more uncomfortable. “Nonono, Wanda, like lay down with me not any of that gross stuff. Ew.” Wanda’s features fill with relief, and she chuckles at my childish comment about sex.
“Of course I will! You just may want to word it a little different next time.” she chuckles as you hide your face with embarrassment. We both get settled on the bed and I feel her two arms pull me towards her and I snuggle closer.
Non readers pov
Wanda slowly gets out of bed after she is sure you are fast asleep and sets off to find Nat. When she does she sees that Nat had barely moved from where she last saw her still with her face in her hands.
“Nat. I know you think you really screwed up, which you did, but it’s y/n/n. You can’t go on without telling her how you feel about her.”
“Wanda, you can’t just look in my mind! We’ve talked about this!”
“Romanoff you know I’m one to keep my promises, so I’d never look without your permission. Maybe if you turned down the volume of your thoughts a few decibels I wouldn’t have heard anything. Also, are you ready that oblivious to the fact the whole team knows you two are like little lovesick puppies for one another when you two aren’t attached by the hip.” she explains, “Now, stop moping around and apologize at least.”
“You’re right, Wands, wish me luck. I hope she can forgive me.”
Natasha gets up and races towards your room. She didn’t want to wait so long to talk to you and apologize, but she thought you wouldn’t want to speak to her after what she’d said.
Similarly, to Wanda’s entrance, Natasha softly knocks on your door enough to wake you even out of your semi-deep sleep.
Readers pov
I jump at the knocks on the door and am confused to see Wanda is no longer beside me.
“Wanda you don’t have to knock, you know that.” I sigh out.
“It isn’t Wanda.” a voice you are able to recognize as Nat sheepishly speaks.
“Oh, what do you need?” I ask, all the heartbreak and ache coming back when I hear the voice I’m usually excited to listen to, as if her speech is my favorite song.
“Can we talk? I need to apologize.”
“Sure,” I softly reply.
Non readers pov
Nat opens the door once she has your permission and sees your usual strong, confident frame look small and fragile. Her heart breaks at the sight of you so broken and in pain because of her own actions. Not to mention your tear stained cheeks when you look towards her. It is silent for a minute or so before you throw your head back onto your pillow staring at the ceiling. This awakens something in Natasha for an unknown reason.
Readers pov
“Y/n, I am so sorry. I know that sorry doesn’t cut it for the amount of hurt I’ve caused you all because I was jealous but I hope we can rebuild what we had but it totally is okay if you don’t want to even though I would love another chance with yo-“
“Nat, calm down. I’m not going to sit here and say I’m fine with what you said because truth be told I love sharing memories of my family when I remember them with you. Not only because I trust you but because I think I care for you and love you more than friends should. I just hope what you said is meaningless or else that is when we can’t rebuild what we had.”
“No y/n/n, I didn’t mean any of it. It was just in the heat of the moment because I saw you laughing at something a recruit said when I was going to ask you if you wanted to go get dinner with me. So, I stormed off like a child and said hurtful things to mask my selfishness because I want you to be mine and mine only.”
“Oh my god Nat. You can’t be serious, I was laughing at something a recruit said because he assumed Clint and I were going out.” Nat bursts out laughing.
“See? Anyone who was told that who knew me would just die of laughter on the spot.” I say as I glance her way while patting the place beside me on my bed. She accepts.
“So you actually like me?” you hopefully ask.
“Possibly depending on if those feelings are reciprocated.”
“They are.” I say.
“Good. Can I also say how sorry I am for saying that to-“ I cut her off but placing a quick peck to her soft lips.
“Uh, uh, uh” I tut, “I don’t want to hear any more apologies come out of that mouth. Could you just hold me?” Natasha is still dumbfounded by the little kiss.
“Of course.” Nat complies pressing your back to her front as she wraps her long toned arms around your frame. I hum at the contact.
At this moment Nat realizes there is no place she’d rather be as she feels like she has the world in her arms.
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saphirered · 3 years ago
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Heyo! Saw you wanted some individual character requests! I'm a sucker for Grog, and there isn't enough out there for him, so I was wondering if you could do a Grog x Sorceress!reader where the reader doesn't think grog would have a reason to like her since she isn't a melee fighter. Thank you so much!
P.s. Your writing is amazing, and I always love reading your works! ❤️
Thank you for the request! I'm glad you like my writing and hope you enjoy this one! Turned out a bit longer than I intended but that means more content. Anyway, Enjoy! 😘
Seated on the stone balustrade feet dangling over the edge looking over the city in front of you you twiddle your thumbs. You needed a moment away from everyone to sort your mind on your own. There’s a solitude in the dark clouds looming above and the first drops of rain signalling an oncoming storm and it’s never failed you before. Even while there’s no one around, you can confide in such storms knowing your words will be heard but carried away upon the wind and drowned out by the rain and thunder. A good storm won’t judge or hold a grudge. It will simply accept and listen. So here you’ll stay speaking your worries into the abyss and hope for some clarity or ease of mind and heart.
Back inside Grog sits on one side of the table, Scanlan at the other. They hold their respective tankards at the ready as the gnome counts down. By the end of the countdown they swing back their drinks finishing them as fast as they can being cheered on by the rest of Vox Machina and other witnesses to this drinking game. Grog’s determined to win this. While he’s pretty sure his tankard is actually a bucket with a handle, it’s more to scale compared to the gnome’s. Ale spills over the sides of Scanlan’s drink but Grog keeps it neat. No wasting ale after all.
With one last big chug Grog finishes the drink, slams it down on the table roaring in victory as the table shakes beneath his hit. Scanlan puts the remainder of his drink down on the table wiping his face disappointed. Grog looks around the crowd. Some are happy celebrating with him, others pass over money to the happy people for paying up on whatever amount they lost in their bets. How could they even consider Scanlan would win. He’s the best of the best after all and no one can out drink the all mighty Grog. He doesn’t spot you among the crowd and the victory doesn’t feel as sweet anymore. He really hoped you could have seen this one. Where had you gone?
Before Grog can get up and go find you he’s given a refill and the next challenger approaches. New bets are placed, Vex massages his shoulders giving him a pep talk and noting how he’s been making her a lot of money so better keep it up. He doesn’t want to disappoint his friends. One more game. Then he’ll go find you wherever you went.
The next game comes along, and another, and another but he’s done. No more games. When another challenger approaches and the game starts he doesn’t pick up the tankard and pushes away from the table. People ask him what the hell he’s doing but he ignores them. They’ve kept him long enough so he just up and walks before they can stop him. Grog leaves the room but Pike follows behind him worried for her buddy. He never refuses a good ale or a challenge, let alone the two combined.
“Grog? Grog, wait up!” Pike rushes after him leaving the banquet hall behind. Determined Grog still keeps walking but slows down his pace enough to let Pike catch up with him.
“Where are you going? There’s still plenty of ale to be drunk!” Pike reaches for the goliath’s hand to pull him to a stop. He does and turns to face Pike.
“I think I’ve had enough.” Grog says and Pike gasps. Never, never does Grog think he’s had enough to drink. Something must be wrong with him. Is he ill? Does he have a fever? Did someone poison her buddy’s drink? She might go on a war path if someone did and ruined his fun! But Grog seems okay. Physically that is. He’s fine.
“Do you know where she went?” Grog asks, maybe Pike can help him find you and maybe she can talk to you why you left. He doesn’t think you’d want to talk to him about that kind of stuff and while he’d consider himself a good listener, if something’s really up Pike always knows what to do. She can help.
“Who?”
“The pretty sorceress.” Grog states as a matter of fact and it is. Anyone who dares say otherwise clearly need some of those glass thingies Percy keeps on his nose and make him look smart.
“Oh, I don’t know Grog. She left to go get some fresh air.” Pike searches her mind to see where you might have gone. There’s a few places that come to mind but it’s all narrowed down to just the one when thunder rumbles through the sky. She knows exactly where you went and by the looks of it so does Grog.
Grog knows there’s only one place you really love to watch a storm unfold. You’ve told him before and you’ve even watched some storms together there. He shares a look with Pike and picks up his step going where he knows you’ll be, still dragging pike behind. When she doesn’t move fast enough he swings her up on his shoulders, running up the steps as far as they’ll take him, dodging a torch and pushing aside a guard here and there.
Then around the corner he sees you. Feet dangling over the edge, a single push away from what could possibly be a death drop, hand outstretched catching the rain with a sad smile on your face. You’re absolutely gorgeous. More alluring than anyone ever could. If he could paint, Grog would make sure this moment would be captured for eternity just so he would never forget. Maybe he can get some money from Vex to hire a painter? If Scanlan did it, why shouldn’t he?
You’re seated alone at the top of the tower. Lightning flashes through the clouds, sometimes branching down to strike the ground be it mountain or forest, you’re in a valley of safety surrounded by the storm. The drops of rain hit your outstretched arm extended beyond the cover of the overhanging. Cold as they are to the touch you watch them glide around your arm with movement until they too, continue their descend.
“…Sometimes I wish I would just have the courage but I don’t.” You speak into the skies. A burst of lightning strikes in the mountains, the sound echoing and even this high up you can feel the slight tremor of the ground. You know a storm is no sentient being but you read it like a reply no less and continue.
“I’m not a fighter. I don’t know how to wield a sword or an axe. I can barely lift one. We have such vastly different lives. Grog’s got no reason to like me in any way.” Thunder strikes again you smile briefly. You’ve come to terms you’ll always like Grog and your feelings wouldn’t be reciprocated. The only reason you’re even spending time together in the first place is because you’re both involved with Vox Machina in one way or another. You’ve got hardly anything in common so if you hadn’t met through them Grog probably wouldn’t even have thought about you twice.
That may sound sad and you’re thankful for getting to know him but Grog has his own life and interests so why should he bother indulging you in yours. He’s already not a big fan of magic and you won’t bother attempting to teach him. It’s not like it’s any interesting stuff and he’d probably be bored out of his mind the entire time. Then again, the theoretics of magic might just not be your strong suit either. It’s more of a natural born gift.
Grog gets this weird feeling in his chest as if he’s been hit by something and it’s being twisted. Kind of like when he got shot by an arrow and Pike had to remove it. It’s not a good feeling. Checking for injury just to make sure he’s fine. It’s clear to him he feels this on the inside; his heart bleeds a little for you. You shouldn’t think that way. He likes you. He likes you a lot actually so you couldn’t be more wrong. Pike nudges him to set her down. He does as they remain around the corner, leaving you unaware of their presence.
“Go talk to her.” Pike whispers and Grog panics for a brief second. How is he even supposed to do this? What is he supposed to say? He doesn’t know how this psychology stuff works. That’s what Pike’s for. If people feel sad they often come to her, talk about their worries and problems and then they feel better. How’s he supposed to do that? He’s not Pike.
“She needs you, Grog. I know you like her and she needs you. Go talk to her.” Pike nudges him on into your direction. The goliath isn’t physically moved by her effort but he does move. If Pike says you need him, if you really need him then he’ll be there. Looking over his shoulder one last time to ask Pike for some advise she’s already half way down the stairs leaving you with him. Grog thinks hard for a moment but thinking isn’t his strong suit either so he’ll do what he always does; face the problem head on.
A throat clears behind you and you almost slip from the fright it gave you. A heavy step rushes forward and an arm wraps around your waist pulling you back before you can fall. You’d have spells to save you in case you did fall but you’d rather not and are grateful for your valiant saviour. The bare arm wrapped around your waist is covered in tattoos, markings and scars and engulfs the majority of your middle. It doesn’t take a fool to know this arm belongs to Grog Strongjaw himself.
Flustered you allow the goliath to pull you back onto solid ground and off the balustrade entirely before he lets go of you, making sure you’re right on your feet. How much of your conversation with the skies did he hear? Did he hear anything at all? Grog steps back and stares at his boots. He doesn’t only appear to be more embarrassed than you feel but also apologetic.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. Please don’t fall again and please don’t be angry at me.” Grog closes his eyes tightly afraid you might be mad at him as he was the cause of you almost experiencing a death drop. You’re basically gods but if we’ve learned anything from Keyleth; that doesn’t save you from a splat.
You step forward grab one of his hands in yours drawing his attention. With your index finger you tilt his chin up just enough so he’s looking at you and not over you. These gestures are enough for Grog to open his eyes. When there’s no look of anger on your face the tension in his body falls away just slightly. There’s still some rigidness from nerves but he’s closer to usual Grog.
“Chin up, big guy. You saved me too. I’m not mad.” You smile and the smile is returned. The air is still somewhat awkward so you decided you best get this over with and clear it up.
“How much did you hear?” You ask. The blush rushing to Grog’s cheeks and frantic glancing around to make sure no one else is here to witness it tells you he heard enough.
With a deep sigh you step back to the balustrade sitting down upon it once more but now to face Grog instead of the sky, your hair blowing lightly in the breeze, the rain and occasional illuminated sky behind you leave him staring yet again forgetting your question. He’s just captivated but you calling his name snaps him out of it. Saved it. Still got it. As long as he doesn’t turn to ‘drunk Keyleth’ levels he’ll consider it a win.
“I-uhhhh…. Why don’t you think I like you?” Grog twiddles his thumbs rocking back and forth from his tiptoes to his heels in anticipation of your answer. He knows he heard you tell the sky but he wants to be sure because if he gave you any reason to believe he didn’t like you, he did do something wrong. He’ll pick you over any of those other fools down stairs. He might just even pick you over the best ale. He’d already picked you over the ale he’d been offered. If that isn’t testament to his fondness of you, then what is?
“Ah, so you did hear that. I just- I think-. Ugh, why is this so hard?” You try to express your reasons but words are difficult and feelings even more so to describe yet still you try. Grog waits patiently either way.
“Do you think we would have been friends were it not for our lives being tied together as they are now?” You ask the dreaded question. You don’t even know if you really want the answer afraid that it may break any semblance of hope you had somewhere in your mind. Grog’s brow furrows, deep in thought but mostly confusion.
“Of course we would be. Why wouldn’t we?”
“Because I’m not like you. I’m not a fighter. I stay back with my spells and incantations while you run in axe swinging taking down anyone in your path. I read while you train. I sit around in my tower watching the skies while you go out and drink the town dry looking for a fight to enjoy. I could never do what you do and I do not dare to assume you’d have any interest in doing what I do.” The thoughts and feelings find words. A tension lifts from your chest like a breath you didn’t know you were holding just by speaking your mind to the goliath in question.
Grog knows damn well you’re not a fighter in the traditional sense. No steel or arrows for you but that does not mean you’re not a fighter in your own right. If he’s learned anything a fighter comes in many shapes and forms and you fit the description perfectly. You’ve shown determination and strength, courage against all odds and immense skill. You are a fighter.
“When I run into danger kicking ass who’s had my back every time?” Grog asks. There’s a harshness and authority in his voice indicating he’s leading somewhere and you better answer.
“We all have-“ Grog cuts you off.
“No. You have had my back every time.” He corrects. “Who comes watch me train, throwing spells to keep me on my toes? Who does it while reading her books completing not one but two tasks at the same time?”
“I do.” You admit.
“And who helps me kick ass in bar fights? Who cheers me on or joins me in any gamble or drinking game? Who is the best drinking buddy? You are. Now, who spends time with you watching storms whenever they occur up here in the tower or anywhere else?”
“You… do…” Grog’s right.
“I like to spend time with you because I like you. I don’t care you don’t swing an axe. That firestorm you do works just the same and looks way more badass. I’m not the smartest but I know two of the same are not always useful and can be too much. What are you going to do with two when you only need one. You need difference so they compitry- complitarity- colmpli-“ Grog struggles with that word. He’s heard Percy use it in a similar context but why is it such a difficult word to recall. He still tries and just hopes you’ll get what he’s trying to say.
“Complimentary?” You ask. You fear Grog might get himself a migraine if he tries any harder. You still don’t think that’s the correct use of the word but you get it. He’s trying to lift your spirits and it’s working.
“That one. Yes. Complimentary. I don’t just like you, I love you for who you are. You’re special and being different makes you special.” Grog admits he tries to fight the heat rising to his cheeks from admitting what he did but when he sees your smile grow, that’s enough to push his pride aside and let it be. Maybe he can do this thing Pike usually does after all? Maybe not unless it’s you. When he tells you he loves you he means it. When he has to say it to the likes of Vax he’d rather eat his own boots for lunch.
You gesture with your hand and beckon the goliath over to come closer. You rise to stand on the edge of the balustrade and wrap your arms around Grog’s neck holding him close. You feel his arms wrap around you in turn and pull you closer to where your feet barely touch the stone.
“Thank you. You have no idea how much that means to me.” You pull back to look Grog in the eyes as he still holds onto you and take his cheeks between your hands giving him a quick kiss. Grog’s eyes light up and lifts you up higher offering you a kiss of his own. Sweet and short and filled with glee. He sets you back down on your feet but doesn’t let go of you yet.
“Do you want to go back downstairs? Last I checked there was a drinking game going on? Should we show them what we’re made off?” You grin and the proud look on Grog’s face tells you enough to know exactly what you’re talking about.
“Let me tell you the tale of my grand victories-“ Grog starts as he begins leading you back down the stairs, arm wrapped around your shoulders pulling you into his side as you walk.
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takaraphoenix · 3 years ago
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Ship game!! What about Nico and Will?? It’s pretty popular, but I don’t think I’ve seen you write much of it…
That's an interesting one in that I have vocalized my reasons for disliking it way back when it first became popular but instead of just linking that, it has been years so I think it's time for an updated version.
Firstly: This post is gonna be properly tagged and not crosstagged so if any shipper comes across it and feels the need to bitch about it, just don't; your lack of curating your own tumblr experience is not my problem! ;D
Now, there are three key factors that play into my dislike of this ship: How it was written, what it represents, how the fandom around it acts.
1. It’s rushed and uncomfortable
In BoO, it was incredibly rushed. They had literally five sentences of interactions before they walked into the literal sunset together. Five. It was just entirely born from Riordan's Noah's Ark Complex, where he just can't let people be single. The series was ending and he needed Nico to have an endgame so he rushed into some random romance with zero build-up.
The way their interactions went down was also severely uncomfortable for me. Will was acting so offended by Nico not wanting to go to camp and be friends in an entitled way that he had no right to be, he downright guilt-tripped Nico about how he had wanted to be friends. Nico has been just so severely traumatized at such a young age and his coping mechanism, as unhealthy as it was, was to run away and hide. Will acted like Nico not wanting to form attachments to people who could potentially leave him again was somehow just an Edgy Emo Decision and not a direct reaction to his trauma. His entire approach to Nico was basically all these hippie posts of "Don't have depression!! Just go out into the sun and stop being depressed!", which is already a bad take with non-medical people but he's supposed to be a doctor (and let's not get into the shadiness of him technically being Nico's doctor).
There is also an inherent "I can fix him" angle to this ship and to me, only few ship dynamics are more uncomfortable than that. If you want to fundamentally change a person's behavior and personality, you... don't actually want to be with this person.
Now, here's where my points overlap, because the following parts of their writing that bothers me also stand for what this ship fundamentally represents.
2. Solangelo is a queer ship written by and for straights
I'm a queer woman and as a queer woman, I want queer wish-fulfillment, not what straights want out of queerness. I'm kind of tired of that, I've been sitting through it for enough decades now. That's, of course, not to say that no straight writer can give proper queer representation, but far too often do straight writers - even the most well-meaning ones - project straight desires of queerness into their queer representation.
Let me explain that closer through this ship.
Nico's been in love with Percy for years and I'm going to do my best to not hijack this post with some Percico agenda; that's not what this his about, this isn't some "my ship is better than your ship" ship-war nonsense. It's simply a canonical fact that Nico has had romantic feelings for another character for years.
A character who, in this medium, is heterosexual. And if you're queer, you've been there. In love with your straight best friend. It's a cliche, but it's a cliche for a reason.
We have also all been well-meaningly rejected by said straight friend.
And here's the straight desires for you: The queer person who was in love with a straight person just immediately stops having those feelings and will then as quickly as possible fall in love with the next queer person they meet to be happy and no longer uncomfortably in love with a straight person, because that thought makes the straights uncomfortable.
Queer wish-fulfillment would be for Percy to return those feelings, for the queer character to get his first love, to not be rejected. That thing queer teens always dreamed about for themselves.
Aside from the wish-fulfillment angle, the pacing is another problem. Let me repeat, Nico was in love for years. But a five sentence conversation with Will once causes a crush on Will and we see him physically turn away from Percy and toward Will just immediately to rebound and actually fall out of love with Percy and in love with Will. Anyone who's ever been unlucky in love will attest to just how unrealistic and ridiculous the pacing here is.
It's also straight queerness in another respect; Nico has been the first ever queer character we meet in that world. He loves a straight guy - and to get over that, we introduce the second queer character. Because heaven forbid there are multiple queers to pick from. No, in straight-written queer romances, there is always that one main queer and then they introduce a second one and the two just immediately hit it off and develop a romance like all a queer person needs to form attraction to someone is the confirmation that the other person shares your sexuality.
Also the notable gay guy on gay guy ship here, whereas the more queer-wish-fulfillment option would have also included more nuance to the queer experience, because Percy doesn't have to be heterosexual just because he has only been with girls so far. It's a very old-fashioned - think 90s and early 2000s - kind of straight-written queerness that there are only exactly two homosexuals and that those two homosexuals then pair up.
And, listen, I'm not immune to these outdated straight-written queers entirely, I have many such ships that I grew up with that I am still fond of because they were groundbreaking at that time and they weren't outdated yet back when they happened in said 90s and early 2000s. I am however a grown woman now and just like I have grown, so has queer rep so I am not as easily baited into falling onto my knees in gratitude for canon rep. You have to go with the times. And this ship, by all that is given to us, is just entirely outdated straight-written rep.
Which, I mention earlier that even straight-written rep can be good. If the author tries. Riordan doesn't really try though; he does the bare minimum when he writes any of his rep - and there have been many, many more qualified voices being very vocal about his depiction of people of color and, as a woman, I've been vocal about his depiction of women. I don't want to derail this post with all of that, but I do think that it bears mentioning that Riordan doing rep but only doing a bare minimum and not putting in the necessary work to deepen the representation he wants to give is a repeating pattern that has been pointed out many times by now.
(I’d also like to point out that no, it is not just the ship and not just the listed instances that make it straight-written rep for straights. It’s Nico’s entire queer arc, starting with his forced coming out. A severely traumatizing event that is completely brushed over because the straight author doesn’t understand the impact this has on queer people. Not to mention the framework; Nico’s coming out isn’t Nico’s story, it happens in Jason’s POV, it is given to us through the POV of the straight bystander who gets to be Best Ally by assuring Nico that being gay is okay. This kind of coming out is not a queer wish-fulfillment, it’s a straight wish-fulfillment of getting to be the straight savior, the ally to show the gay the light of acceptance. And, additional to the ridiculous pacing of how fast Nico gets over his love for Percy, Nico also gets over years of internalized homophobia just because of, I don’t know, Jason’s few encouraging words and the fact that Will paid attention to him? For a gay kid who was in the closet all his life, the nonchalant way in which he publicly confessed his crush to Percy at the end made absolutely no sense and was written as basically a joke, finished off with Nico literally high-fiving Percy’s girlfriend despite those two never having seen eye to eye before but this is straight wish-fulfillment so all straights are Super Allies, because that’s the way straights want to see themselves, even though Annabeth has shown before just how jealous she can be and she most definitely wouldn’t go around high-fiving people who confess to her boyfriend. Nothing about Nico’s queer arc in HoO felt natural or queer or satisfying.)
Sure, Solangelo on a surface level is big because it's a canon queer couple in a YA book-series and kudos for that and yay for the kids who get to grow up seeing queers in YA books, but I actually do think that kids growing up with books written in the 2010s shouldn't grow up with 1990s levels of representation, because the 2010s overall are actually at a far more nuanced and better level of representation when it comes to queerness. And I do reserve the right to quit on too straight-written and too outdated queer rep in a landscape where I can get more satisfying representation elsewhere; we don’t live in times anymore where you necessarily have to love every bit of rep because it’s the only one you get.
Now that we've gone through my first two gripes, let's wrap this up with the final point, because it also directly ties into this.
3. The new wave of antis hiding behind this ship
A huge part of the fandom is so busy kissing Riordan's ass solely for giving them queer rep at all they think that both the author and the ship are beyond flawless and that kind of attitude is not good. Just because an author includes rep doesn't make either perfect. Absolutely no one is beyond critique - especially not when said critique comes from the very people the author is representing. And even beyond any "valid" critique on the ship, quite frankly, someone should also be allowed to just not like it, without any reasons given at all.
But there is a certain... protective obsessiveness about this ship that doesn't allow a not liking. Very similar to how PJO bore this mindset around Perc/abeth already. It's okay to have OTPs, even OTPs that you have a blindspot for and just don't want to see any flaws in. It is however not okay to then go around attacking people who don't like the thing and mind their own business.
Solangelo's bred a new generation of antis in this fandom. And, particularly with the fact that this post too receives an "anti" tag, I feel like there needs to be a clarification (because tumblr likes to forget what actually makes an anti). Not liking something doesn't make you an anti, venting in properly tagged posts doesn't either; it's the people who harass others, who seek out the content they dislike to then complain that it even exists and who actively try to make others stop creating for it - those are antis.
And with Solangelo's popularity, there was a high rise in Percico antis, who sought it out, were unnecessarily nasty about it, harrassed creators and tried to enforce some kind of "Solangelo supremacy" that won't allow other ships for the characters.
I've been in fandom long enough to be perfectly aware that not all Solangelo shippers count into this category and that there are completely normal and nice Solangelo shippers, but this is a Venn diagram where the overlap between Solangelo shippers and antis is too large to not widely associate the nasty people with the ship itself. (I've been there myself, shipping the very ship behind which a fandom's antis all hid. The second-hand embarrassment of having these people give the ship a bad name is horrendous and I do feel bad for all the normal Solangelo shippers.)
The more often I encountered these people, who made Percico bad (sometimes in wildly ridiculous manners that bent and deliberately misinterpreted canon) and who in the same breath praised Solangelo high, the more tired I grew of that ship. It's a simple game of association, really. You see that linked to the gross and nasty behavior and you start associating the ship itself with that gross and nasty behavior - and with all the things I said before that already weighed into my dislike of the ship, this just was the final tipping point, really.
And that's it. That sums up why I dislike Solangelo. It was hastily rushed, uncomfortable in its execution, it is outdated rep that very much feels as straight-written as it factually is and it does not feel aimed at me as a queer person but rather at the straight audience and it has gathered a cult following of quite uncomfortable people who on their own would be reason enough to avoid it so you can avoid them.
Send me a ship and I will explain why I do or don't ship it
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luimagines · 3 years ago
Text
The Chain Confesses While Your Hurt/Upset Part 3
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Masterlist
Part 1 Part 2
The third and final part of this instalment will include Sky, Twilight and Hyrule!
You know the drill, content under the cut!
Sky
Sky was on watch again and there was still some time before the sun was supposed to rise.
Strangely, he felt more awake than he knew he usually would.
It was unnerving and Sky didn’t know what to do with change or what it meant.
He sighed and let the sounds of the terrain cascade over him. The gentle whispers from the breeze shook the leaves and there was subtle calls from the wildlife through the night.
It was calming.
Sky couldn’t figure out why he was so tense. 
He took another breath and look around his friends, all asleep and worn out from the day’s events. Even he could admit it was rather uneventful considering their circumstances, but he welcomed it.
As he glanced at each of his companions, he felt his gaze linger on you a little longer.
He knew he was smitten with you.
He knew that if you were to ask him- he’d give you his heart, soul, and everything in between. There was little he wouldn’t do for you and every time you so much as smiled at him, he would collapse into a warm puddle within himself.
But you weren’t smiling right now.
Actually the longer he stared, the more it looked like you were actually quite upset.
A nightmare?
Sky stood up and made his way over to you, trying his hardest to not step on the boys in the process.
It was only when he squatted by your side did you whimper and curl further into yourself. 
Seeing as you weren’t awake just yet, it gave all the information Sky needed to make his decision.
He reached over and shook your shoulder violently and took a step back.
You jolted awake with a gasp and blinked your eyes a few times, taking in your surroundings. Sky waited for you to realize where you were before he reached forward again. “Hey. You ok?”
“Oh.” You took in a breath and sat up. “I... I think so.”
Sky sat down next to you and brushed your hair away from your shoulder and out of your eyes. 
“Was it bad?” You ask him.
“You tell me.” Sky smiles a bit.
“I wasn’t thrashing around too much, was I?” You reiterate and look around the group. “I didn’t wake anyone up?”
“No, it was actually kind of hard to tell you were even having a nightmare.” Sky admits.
“Oh... ok, good, that’s probably the best case scenario.” You gulps and place your hand over your heart, taking long deep breaths to calm yourself down. “Thank goodness it was just a dream.”
“Was it bad?” Sky throws your question back at you.
You startle and look Sky in the eye, gripping your blankets with iron like strength. Sky takes a note.
“It...” You shake your head. “It could have been worst. It wasn’t even that scary. Just... disturbing...and sad. I’d rather not have those mental images again.”
“Anything I can do to help?”
“Um.... Can I join you?”
“Absolutely.” Sky stands up and gives you his hand. You take it without hesitation and let him lift you onto your feet. Silently, you follow him back to the watch log and take a sit next to him. You’re still a little shaken by what you’ve seen in your own mind and you don’t mind taking a moment to digest and process it.
Sky for his part is staring to feel a little silly. He wants to spend more time with you, yes, but now what? And how does he not make a fool of himself now that he’s actually spending time alone with you?
A part of him is starting to catastrophize, thinking of all the ways he can do something stupid and completely ruin his reputation. For all he knows he’s going to trip (even if he’s sitting right now) and fall right into the fire. You’d laugh at him- never take him seriously again and then he’d really never have a chance with you.
He knows it’s illogical and it’s actually not the worst thing that can happen- but his nerves at getting to him and it’s making him question everything.
“Sky, can I ask you something?” You say after a tense moment of silence.
“Sure.” Sky’s voice cracks. He coughs a little to clear his throat and tries again. “Yeah, anything. Go ahead.”
“Why do I make you so nervous?” You say.
Suddenly Sky feels like he’s been punched in the heart. For all the wrong reasons.
Your voice is quiet and resigned... your sad and you don’t look at him. “Do I scare you or something? Is there something about me that you don’t trust? Did I do something wrong?”
“No, no, no, not at all.” Sky rushes to quell your fear, even if he’s starting to panic.
“Then what?” You sigh and pull your knees up. “Did I make you upset? I know you don’t like confrontation but I don’t know why you’ve been getting worse... If it was something I did, you can tell me, I’m grown, I can take it, what did I do wrong?”
“You did nothing wrong.”
“Well, I’ve had to have done something.” You snap. “You always try to end the conversation early and leave. You don’t like spending time with me, and you almost never answer my questions with a full sentence. You can never look me in the eye and have to wonder what on earth goes through your head if you don’t even want to stand next to me. Sometimes I think you’re just nice to me because you’re a good person but I don’t think you like me very much.”
Sky gulps heavily and begins weighing his options.
“I think you know that I like you.” You mutter.
Wait. WHAT?
“Is that what the problem is?” Your voice jumps a little on the last word and it sounds like you’re going to cry. “Was I too obvious? Did I make you uncomfortable? God, I’m sorry. I can pull back. I’m pretty sure you have a girlfriend anyway.. right? That Zelda? I mean, your Zelda? You’re together, aren’t you? I’m so stupid. Of course you’re together, what on earth was I thinking?”
“We’re not.” Sky jumps in his seat and twists his body to face you head on. “You’re wrong. You’re so wrong. I don’t have a girlfriend.”
Sky reaches over and grabs your shoulders, twisting you around as well so that you’d look at him.
You look away regardless and scoff. “You’re a catch. I doubt that you’re single.”
“I.. Am very flattered but you’re still wrong.” Sky laughs a little incredulously. He can’t believe this. Is this really happening? “Believe it or not I am very single.”
“Oh.” You sniff and reach up to pinch your eyes together, trying to subtly wipe away the tears neither of you have mentioned. “I’m sorry I’m a mess. I can leave you alone if you want.”
“That’s the last thing I want.” Sky blurts and belatedly realizes that he said that out loud.
“Then what? What is it? Work with me Link, because I’m not a mind reader.” You sit a little taller and finally look at him. “What do I have to do so that you’re comfortable around me? I don’t like the feeling of there being some....kind of mine field that I’m left dancing around. I really don’t want to see it blow up on either of us.”
“There’s nothing you can do.” Sky gulps. “It has nothing to do with you. I’m the problem.”
“That’s always the answer isn’t it.” You scoff again and unfurl yourself, turning away from him. “The ‘it’s not you, it’s me’ scenario.”
“It’s because... I-” Sky bites his lip and cups your cheek experimentally, putting just enough pressure to guide your face back to him but letting you fight him if you so desired. 
You don’t and you let face be held by him for a moment.
“I love you.” Sky says to you, trying to hold eye contact and will the truth into your head. “I’ve been in love with you for a while now. I’m sorry I’ve been such a mess. I never wanted you to feel unwanted or give off the impression that it was anything less.”
You stare at him, eyes growing comically wide.
Sky gulps at the lack of verbal reaction and tries to laugh to lighten the mood. It doesn’t work but he tries. “I uh- haha- didn’t do a very good job at hiding it, I guess.”
“Oh my god, I’ve read all the signs backwards.” You whisper.
Sky snorts and leans into your direction. “You can say that, yeah.”
“I’m so stupid.”
“You are not stupid.” He growls. “Stop calling yourself that. I’ll fight you over it.”
“And don’t want that, do I?”
“No. No you do not.”
“Ok.” You break into a grin and laugh after a second, running your hands through your hair. “Are you serious? You like me? Me? The most boring person here?”
“We’re going to have a have a long talk about this and why you can’t keep putting yourself down.” Sky frowns. “You are not stupid and you are not boring. You are intelligent and thoughtful and kind and amazing and like no one I’ve ever met. I bet I could search for a million years and I’ll never come across someone quite like you.”
“You’re going to make me cry.”
“I’ll be here to dry your tears. It’s ok.” Sky grins and places both of his palms against your cheeks.
“I love you.” You blurt and place your hand over his, turning into it to hide your blushing face behind them.
“And I love you.” Sky leans in some more and places a kiss against your forehead.
“Can I stay up with you a little more?”
“Please.”
Twilight
The postman ran into the group, almost bowling them over with an urgent letter held high. He asks if there’s any one in your group with your name and Twilight sees the despair collide onto your face.
You raise your hand and slowly take the letter away from him. You thank him with a tense and fake smile out of politeness and watch as he leaves.
You’re scared to open the letter and Twilight belatedly remembers the trouble you’ve mentioned that’s been brewing during your absence.
Twilight frowns as he watches you read the letter, each sentence apparently worse than the last.
He sees you shut down and put your walls up from the rest of the group.
Your whole demeanor changes and you don’t even finish reading the letter. The contents upset you so much that you fold it in half again and shove it in your pocket.
“Let’s go.”
Wind bite his lip. “Are you o-”
“I don’t want to talk about it.” You snap and head off in the direction they were going in before they paused for you to get your mail. Your steps are fast and determined, light and flighty, like you’re seconds from running or breaking out in a sprint but don’t want to make a scene.
The group exchanges multiple glances and hesitantly follow you, no one saying a word about what happened or what they think the letter said.
Twilight can guess though.
A while ago a similar letter arrived for you that also held bad news. It threw you into a funk for a few days and it took all of their combined efforts to distract you and help you feel better. It had seemed that there was some trouble back home that you could do nothing about.
He figures that this letter was sent to tell you it got worse. 
With a sigh he marches on and waits.
Twilight waits until nightfall.
The others have taken the subconscious decision to leave you alone and wait until you’re a little more sorted out. The younger ones seem to be under the impression that you’re angry- and maybe you are- and they don’t want to risk having your wrath pointed in their direction.
But Twilight has seen enough to know your look.
Time knows it. 
Warrior knows it too
And maybe if he studies for long enough, he would see Wild figure out the look as well.
You’re ready to rain absolute hell fire but you can’t. 
It upsets you and he tempted to think your fury is more out of sadness than any actual rage.
When it’s his turn to take watch and he’s sure that Four has fallen asleep again, he makes his way over to you and studies you for a moment.
He places a hand on your shoulder and shakes you lightly. “I know you’re not actually asleep.”
“Buzz off Twi.”
“Want to walk it off?” He offers. “I still have to check the perimeter. Some company would be nice.”
You sigh and let your arm fall off of your face to look in the eye. you stare at him for a moment and Twilight tries to ignore the budding bullets of sweat that begin to down his back. “...Sure.”
He smiles a bit, for your sake, because it hurts him to see you so upset still. Twilight extends his arm out for you to take and you slip your hands into his. He lifts you up with practiced ease and together to begin to walk out of the camp and around what they’ve set up as their perimeter.
Usually Twilight would take his wolf form and do the job this way but that probably would have tipped your hand since you weren’t asleep to begin with. 
“Let me guess.” You start once you’re far enough away. “You want to ask me what the letter was about. Get me to spill my heart out and tell you all my secrets and help me feel better.”
“I’d want to help you feel better regardless if you told what was in the letter or not. You don’t have to tell me anything.” Twilight admits with a slight blush on his face. “But movement always helps me think. Or if you want to think about something else for a little bit instead of the letter, we could just talk about other stuff too... Whatever you need... I want you to know that I’m here for you.”
You take a long breath from your nose and let it slowly out your mouth. “I know... I know that Link. I’m sorry.”
He’s never heard you say his name before.
Twilight doesn’t know if he hates it or not. 
I mean, he’d gladly hear you say his name, don’t get me wrong... 
But in that tone? With that level of... resignation? Despair? 
You sound like you’re about to cry.
“It’s just...” You start and stop in the middle of the trail. You press the heel of your palm harshly into your eyes- maybe you really are about to cry. “My grandma is dying.”
Oh.
“She dying, Link and I’m not there. I thought she was just sick and it would only be a matter of time until she was back on her feet but she’s not getting any better. And to make stupid matters worse....You see... between me and my grandma, we take care of Zelda, she’s my cousin, and my little brother. My dad works and sends us money but he’s never home and my mom’s not around anymore and I don’t know what to do.”
Twilight places a hand on your shoulder, rubbing experimental circles on your back for a second. When you don’t push him away he slides into your personal space and hugs you, squeezing you tightly until you let go of the stress that’s no doubt building inside of you.
You hug him back just as hard and it surprises him for a moment. “I couldn’t even finish that stupid letter. It said that... We can’t... My dad can’t come home yet and god, Twi, they’re just kids. They can’t be left alone. Link is five and Zelda is seven. There’s no one who’s going to take care of them. They’re going to take them away. They’re going to take my little brother away.”
Twilight bites his lip and can feel himself understanding the situation a little more. Kinda. Maybe. Ok no. Not really. He wants to say that someone else from your hometown can pitch in and help. That they should have been helping from the get go. It’s how it works in Ordon and it sounds like the others would be in similar boats if this was their family but from what he’s gathered your Hyrule is very different.
He doesn’t know how things work in your Hyrule and he doesn’t know who this ‘they’ is but he can guess that’s it someone (or some people) with more power than you do, especially since you’re not home right now.
He can hear it in your tone.
“Is there anything I can do to help?” He asks instead. He doubts it but god! How he hates to see you in pain! 
“Not unless we somehow end up in my world and we bring them with us.” You wince and hide your face in his neck. “They’re just kids Link. I... I don’t think  I’m even old enough to fight for them. They’re going to say I’m too young and that I don’t have a job... even if it’s my dad who’s been paying for all of us...I hate their stupid politics and political junction and they just want to rip away what they don’t have.”
“Who’s taking care of them right now?” Twilight cradles your head with his hand, keeping his arm tightly wrapped around your waist. “Who’s taking care of your grandma?”
“The neighbors, I think.” You sniff. “But it’s already putting a strain on them. They’re not going to hold out much longer. I won’t even be able to say goodbye to my grandma. God, this is such a mess.”
“I’m sure we’ll get the chance to fix this- there’s no way this would just happen. We’d help you. We’d all pitch in. If it does happen that we need to take them, we will. We’ll find a safe space for them. Maybe Time will lend the Ranch, I know they’d be welcome in my village and Wild’s too, maybe. You’re not alone in this, ok?”
“Would you really do that?” You tilt your head up. He nods and you nearly tear up again. “Thank you.”
“Of course.” Twilight gulps and grips your tight once again. I love you, he thinks, would I even need a reason to help you?
Your grip tightens on him in return and Twilight takes a moment to try and calm his heart. “We should try to contact your dad and see if there’s any way for him to do anything-”
“Oh my god he’s going to kill me.”
“Why?”
“...”
“...”
“... He may or may not know that I’m here.”
Twilight tenses and nearly groans. “Do I even want to know why?”
“In my defense, I told my grandma. My dad... doesn’t really care about me anyway. He doesn’t really care for my brother anyway. Zelda is his favorite. It’s why she’s with us. But I am supposed to be there to help grandma... not out here... saving the world.”
Twilight sighs and shakes his head fondly. “We’ll figure something out. I promise.”
He’d take care of your family in a heartbeat if you’d let him. Twilight takes a breath. He loves you so much- if could fight all your problems away he would.
“I believe you.”
“Yeah,” Twilight lets you go and  begins to guide you back through the forest trail. “We should get going, the perimeter isn’t going to check itself.”
“What? Link wait.” You grab his bicep and pull yourself closer again. “Do you mean it?”
“Of course I do.” He smiles. “We’d all help. I know it. You don’t have to worry too much about it.”
“No I... Yes, that. Thank you but that wasn’t what I was talking about.” You shake your head and wait or him to answer, trying to will into his head what it was that you were referencing.
Twilight thinks for a moment and tilts his head. “About the ranch or my village? Malon might have her hands full if she’s willing to watch them for us but there’s plenty for them to do there. And my village has a soft spot for foundlings anyway. I’m sure they’d be overjoyed to have young children playing around again. Wild’s house in Hateno has kids their age too, so it’s another good place for them, and they’d already have the house open for them.”
“No, no, not that either.” You gulp. “A bit... a bit after that...”
“About contacting your dad?”
“No- not...” You blush deeply and begin to nervously shuffle on your feet.
It’s weird because Twilight can’t think of anything that he said that would have that reaction.
“You said you loved me.” You say in a small voice. 
Twilight then pales to hard that he’s not sure how he manages to stay on his feet. He’s almost certain he can feel the moment where his soul leaves his body.
“That you’d take care of my family, that you’d fight my problems...” You continue without knowledge of the bomb you’ve just dropped. “Do you mean it? Or am I looking too much into it? Because I’ve always thought you might have had a thing for me and but I didn’t want to be the one to read the situation wrong but if you’re saying out loud-”
“I wasn’t supposed to say that out loud.”
Twilight voice does not crack when he says this.
“Oh... um..” You bite your lip. “Is it-? Am I wrong then? Did you not say that? I thought- Well, I wanted... I do like you, so I had hoped.... But if you’re not-”
“No, I do! I am! I-! URRGGHH-!” Twilight cuts himself off and ruffles his hair furiously with both of his hands. “This isn’t how I wanted you to find out. This is probably to lamest way you could have found out.”
He hides his face in his hands and doesn’t look up when he hears you quietly giggle. “Do you mean it though?”
“Yes.” He doesn’t look up.
He hears you approach him and refuses to meet you in the eye. He doesn’t look at you even when you gently take his hands and pull them away from his face. Even when you caress his cheek and steer him to the side. His eyes do however nearly bulge out of his head when he feels your lips on his cheek.
“I love you too then.” You smile.
“I didn’t want to lose my cool.”
“Can’t lose what you never had.” You snort and move his hair away from his forehead, admiring the blush on his cheeks and ears. “I’ll go back to camp. You finish checking up on the perimeter.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah... I should be asleep anyway.”
“Ok... Goodnight then.”
“Goodnight Link and thank you. I feel better now.”
“I’m glad.”
Hyrule
“I bet you ten rupees that you can’t make that jump.”
“I say twenty that I can.”
“Oh yeah? Prove it then.”
Hyrule smirks and takes a few steps back, letting his gaze drift just beyond the chasm and toward his target. “I’m about to be twenty rupees richer.”
“Just don’t injure yourself.” You cross your arms. “I don’t have the patience to deal with Legend’s smothering when he finds out I challenged you.”
“He’d be smothering me, not you.” He snorts.
“Yeah, but you’ll be fine.” You deadpan. “It’s not even that deep. Besides he’ll blame me for it no matter how badly you get hurt.”
“I’ll try to land safely then.”
“Not a single bruise!”
“For your sake.”
“Thank you.” You put your weight onto one foot, shifting your hip outward to watch as Hyrule takes a running start. “Don’t die.”
“I love your vote of confidence.” Hyrule snorts and leaps at the last second off of the ledge.
He jumps higher than you would have imagined him to be capable of and it stuns you completely. Hyrule for his part, lands on the other side, unharmed and on both of his feet.
He turns around with a large grin on his face and places his hands on his hips as he looks you in the eye. There’s the slight smell of magic in the air but you don’t question or notice it. “Your turn.”
Your jaw drops. “I am not doing that.”
“Come on. It’s not so bad.” He laughs and smirks at your disbelief. “I’ll call off the bet if you can make it. You know what, instead, let’s double it.”
“I can’t make that.” You screech. “You’re crazy!”
Hyrule snorts. “You’re scared~!”
“I’m not scared!”
“Scaredy cat! Scaredy cat!”
“Fine! I’ll do it!” You pout and take the few steps to the side where he took his running start. You take a breath and try to set up the same process that he did.
With your running start, you leap a little later than Hyrule did, because there’s no way you can jump as high as he did, and you can see how this is going to end.
You’re not going to make it.
Hyrule sees it too and tries to make a mad dash to the ledge with his hand out to grab you. 
Your fingertips brush against each other and Hyrule jumps at the last second to grasp your hand...
He misses.
You fall.
“NOO!” Hyrule’s voice rips through his throat and he falls right onto his chest by the ledge in some desperate attempt to catch you but it’s no use. He sees you crash into the wall, a sickening crack coming from your body and you fall down. Your knees bend as your feet make purchase on the dirt but inevitably slip and it only curls you into a ball, rolling you backwards until you eventually hit the bottom of the relatively shallow ravine.
And by shallow, I mean it’s more or less a twenty foot drop.
Survivable?
Absolutely.
Will you come out unharmed?
Well...
“I’m so dead.” Hyrule mutters to himself and gets to his feet. He dashes along the edge, trying to find a point where he can jump down safety and get back to you. It takes a total of five minute for him to find a quasi decent spot. It’s a half baked idea and he knows it but he jumped down the lesser distance and runs back in the direction he came.
You’re getting up slowly by the time he reaches you and he forces himself to go a little faster.
“I think I figured you out, you cheater.” You groan when you look up and see him. “You used your magic to make that jump.”
“Uhh...”
“What on earth made you think that I was going to do the same?”
“I over shot it? So you should have been fine?” Hyrule chuckles nervously and reaches over to brush your hair out of your face.
Blood is absolutely pouring down your face and it looks as if you have a broken nose.
“Link, I’m going to punch you.” You groan and place your hands by your nose.
“No, wait, hold on-” Hyrule gulps and places his hands on your wrists, trying to stop you.
In one fluid motion to pop your nose back onto place and sigh of relief.
Hyrule’s eye widen and he’s both horrified and impressed. 
“What?” You snap.
“I’m in love with you.”
“What?” You say again.
Hyrule’s hands fly over his mouth. “Nothing. I said nothing! You’re hearing things. Let me just- umm...”
You send his healing spell over in your direction and lets it go permeate through the space.
“Link.”
He looks away from you.
“What is wrong with you?” You furrow your eyebrows. “Don’t say something like that unless you mean it.”
Hyrule gulps and bite his lip. Because he means it.
“We don’t have to talk about this.” You sigh and let him heal you. 
Hyrule doesn’t respond and focuses on letting the spell fall against your nose and your back. 
“Rulie?” You blink and finally look at his face. “How much trouble do you think we’ll be in if we get caught? Legend will probably have both of our heads if he finds out about it.”
A moment of silence passes.
“I don’t think Time will do much about it and Twilight doesn’t have the pull he thinks he has in the group.” You continue when he doesn’t reply, nervously shifting in your spot as Hyrule works. “Warrior will probably keep on a tighter leash than usual though.”
He doesn’t say anything, letting the spell fall. Hyrule feels a little drained after using as much magic has he already has but he can’t help but feeling a little miffed. 
“Link, please say something.” 
“I meant it.” He’s barely able to hold back the scowl because he knows he’s not that impressive and you’re so amazing that there’s not way in this green earth that you’re not already taken. So of course, you’d just assume that he’s being fresh and brush him off.
“What?”
“I meant it.” He looks your way. “I wasn’t joking.”
“Uhhh..”
Hyrule huffs a bit when he see that you don’t understand him yet. “I’ve been in love with you for a while now.”
You still and he can see you gulp slightly. “Oh.”
Hyrule feels like a child and he leans away from you, falling onto his back. “Anything still hurt?”
“Um... No...” You shift your weight again and grip your wrist. “I feel a lot better now. Thank you.”
“Good.” Hyrule stands and reach out for you to take his hand. “We should head back to the others.”
“Hyrule.”
“They’re going to start getting worried about us.”
“Link.”
“What?”
“I’m sorry.” You bite your lip and and stop him from going any further. “Are you serious? Did you mean it mean it? Because I didn’t want to discredit-”
He sighs and grips your hand a little tighter and brings it up to his lips. Hyrule places a delicate feather like kiss on your knuckles and lowers it just enough to study your hand in his. “It’s fine. I doubt your partner would appreciate it anyway if I were to just-”
“I don’t have a partner...” You gulp and grip his tighter in reply. “I’m not in a relationship. I didn’t... I’m not trying to-”
“Forget it.” He smiles a little falsely. “Like you said, we don’t need to talk about it.”
“Oh.... Oh Link...” You frown and step into his personal space, placing both of your hand on his shoulders.
“I don’t need your pity. It’s fine.” He rolls his eyes and tries to pull away from you.
“No, please, not like this...” You stop him and hug him tightly. “I love you too! I panicked when you said that! Don’t- don’t shut me out! Please.”
“What happened to not saying that unless you mean it?”
“Liiinnkk...” You groan and place your face into the crook his neck.
Hyrule doesn’t deny how nice it feels to have you hold him. Slowly, he raises his arms to wrap them around you as well. You’re warm and your heart beat is strong even with your layers and armor. He takes a breath and is assaulted by your smell. It strangely reminds him of vanilla and cinnamon with freshly churned dirt and morning dew thrown into the mix. An odd combination but he finds that it’s pleasant.
“God, I’m sorry. Is that what you want to hear? I didn’t mean it. I’m sorry. Please forgive me. I panicked. I swear I panicked.” You nuzzle into him and he won’t deny the way his heart flutters as you do so.
“Calm down. It’s ok.”
“It really isn’t!”
“It is because I say so.” Hyrule snorts and rests his head against yours. 
“Do you really think the others are looking for us?”
“Maybe. But I don’t think we actually have to go back just yet.”
“Then stay here? With me?”
“Yes.” Hyrule sighs of contentment and begins to sway with you back and forth. “I’d love nothing more.”
285 notes · View notes
j-j-ehlby-writes · 3 years ago
Text
Almost (c.e.)
Pairing: Chris Evans x reader
Word Count: ~5.9k
Summary: You and Chris were set up on a blind date by your mutual friends. Sparks flew, but you never heard from him again. Two years later, you come face-to-face with him once more for their friends wedding.
Warnings: Some angst, swearing, not much else
A/N: This is a mixture of the movie “Life as We Know It” (mmm Daddy Josh Duhamel 🤤), a dating experience I had, and one scene from One Tree Hill. Enjoy.
My Masterlist
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                    Two years ago…
My heart is pounding all the way to my ears. My hands are shaking under the table. My knee bounces uncontrollably as I wait.
I knew this was a bad idea. Why did I let her convince me to do this?
“You haven’t had a boyfriend for as long as I’ve known you.” My best friend so pointedly mentioned when we were out to lunch last week.
 “What’s wrong with that?” I counter.
“I’ve known you for three and a half years.” She deadpans. Even without looking at her, I know she has her eyebrow raised at me and her lips are pursed.
“Your point?” I know she thinks my serious lack of companionship these past few years is wearing on me, but it’s been quite the opposite. Not being attached is freeing. I can do what I want when I want; I don’t have anyone to answer to. If I want to sleep until 3 on a Saturday, I’m going to do it. If I don’t want to socialize with anyone, I won’t. If I want to take a spontaneous road trip, I’m going to do it. My life is my own and that’s how I like it.
“I want my best friend to have someone to experience life with.”
My shoulders dropped, sighing in defeat. There was no way I was getting out of this conversation.
“I want you to be as happy as I am.” I see the love in her eyes as her mind goes to her boyfriend and their new relationship. They’ve only been together for a few months, but I know that this is it for her. She’s a smitten kitten and he is equally as infatuated with her. They’re sickeningly cute. “Which is why I think you need to meet one of his friends-”
“Lemme stop you right there,” I interrupt her, “I hate blind dates.”
“You’ve never been on one.”
“And there’s a reason for that.” She rolled her eyes at me. “They’re cliché, they’re awkward for both parties, and they never amount to anything, thus being a total waste of time.”
She sighed, “Ever the skeptic.”
“And don’t you forget it.”
“Regardless,” she continues, “I think you’ll really like this guy. He’s already expressed interest in you.”
Like that makes everything better. “Great so now I have to live up to his impossible expectations of me when I know absolutely nothing about him.” As if the idea of a blind date wasn’t bad enough, now it’s only a semi-blind date. There’s no doubt in my mind that she has hyped me up impossibly high, that’s what a best friend is for. However, when your confidence level is next to none and already skeptical of the pending meeting, there’s no way he’ll like who I am in reality.
“I can tell you anything you want to know about him.” She is bargaining with me. She really wants me to meet this guy. She wouldn’t be trying this hard if she didn’t believe we would hit it off.
“Well is he nice?” This was the only real question I had. If he isn’t kind then there’s really no future.
“Incredibly!” She continues to tell me of the many things he has done for a charity he started a few years ago and slowly but surely she was starting to convince me. If he was that generous then he has to have a good heart and therefore is a good man.
How bad could it be?
I check my phone, glancing at the time. Great, he’s late. That can’t be a good start.
Numerous reasons why popped into my head.
Reason one: he saw me and bolted.
Reason two: he got into an accident on the way here and he could be in the hospital.
Reason three: he changed his mind and decided to stand me up.
More and more played through my head as I sipped my drink. 
By the time I was on my second drink, I was convinced he wasn’t showing up. I knew this was a ridiculous idea. I knew I shouldn’t have done this. I never should have listened to her.
I chugged the rest of my drink followed by some water before standing up to leave some cash. I was slightly humiliated for actually thinking this would be any different than all of my expectations.
My shoulder rammed into another as I turned to leave.
“Oh my, God, I’m so sorry!” A hand steadied me, gently grabbing the shoulder he ran into. “Are you okay?”
“My already small ego is a little bruised, but I think I’ll live.” I looked up to meet my assaulter’s eyes and immediately I froze.
Holy shit, it’s Chris Evans.
His piercing blue eyes were staring right at me, his concern was directed towards me. In all of his charming, ray of sunshine, bearded glory, he was here.
“I’m so sorry that I’m late. Traffic was insane over the bridge. I would have called but I don’t have your number.” He half-smirked but not in a cocky way. I’d seen him do it in interviews before. He could have come up with a lame excuse, but somehow I knew he was telling the truth.
“No, it’s okay. I understand completely.”
He sighed in relief, his gorgeous and perfect smile taking over his features. He looked down at the table and it disappeared. “Were you leaving?”
“Uh,” I stammered, “I was because I thought I was being stood up.”
“I feel awful. Please let me make it up to you. Let’s sit down, have a nice dinner, and get to know each other.”
I hesitate, now even more nervous than I was before.
As if sensing my hesitation, he decided to sweeten the pot a bit to persuade me, “We can even get dessert.”
I chuckle at his attempt. That’ll do it though. I sit back down with him following suit, finally starting our date.
We talked about everything. Anything and everything. No topic was off limits. Hours went by but it felt like minutes. We didn’t even know how long we’d been there until our waiter came to tell us that the restaurant was closed. We left and walked around the city until the night sky was giving way to the morning. He accompanied me back to my car, gave me the best hug I’ve ever received and a kiss on the cheek, promising we’ll get together again soon, and opening and closing my car door for me. I drove away with the biggest smile on my face and literal butterflies in my stomach. That was the best date I’d ever been on.
When I made it back to my apartment with the early morning rays peeking through my shades, I had a text message waiting for me from him. Just a simple good night, he had had an amazing time, and he couldn’t wait to see me again.
I fell asleep, hopeful. Hopeful that I would see him again, that this could maybe go somewhere. I don’t want to get ahead of myself, but it was hard not to. I hadn’t felt this way in an exceptionally long time. I haven’t been on this good of a date in equally as long. I can’t wait to see him again…
                      Present day...
I finally pull into the parking lot after an hour stuck in traffic. My 12-hour day at work today has taken a lot out of me. I’m exhausted, mentally and physically. Thankfully though, my 2-week-long vacation starts tomorrow. After that, I have fourteen days of no working, no getting up at the ass crack of dawn to be able to drive in miserable traffic, no dealing with difficult or boring co-workers. Just fourteen days of rest and relaxation, after the wedding of course.
My best friend and her fiancé are getting married on Saturday. I’ve watched them go through all of their highs and lows throughout the last few years and when he came to me telling me he planned on proposing, I couldn’t have been happier for them. He even asked me to secretly photograph the moment for her. She was more than surprised about everything.
Now their wedding is here and everyone couldn’t be more excited to celebrate them.
Tomorrow is their rehearsal dinner. The wedding party and their plus ones are all invited.
I walk into my apartment, immediately relieving myself from the confines of my shoes. A heavenly scent registers to me and I’m carried all the way to the kitchen. I see my sexy boyfriend standing at the stove with his back towards me.
“Hey babe,” he calls without turning around.
I hum, happily making my way towards him. I wrap my arms around his waist, placing a kiss on his back. “What is that unbelievable smell?”
He chuckles, vibrating through his chest. “Your favorite, of course.”
I hum again, “You spoil me, baby.”
He chuckles again, turning in my arms. His handsome face finally came into view. His gorgeous brown eyes look into mine as I get lost in his. For the past year, I’ve been the happiest I’ve been in a while. Since the day I met him, it was like everything fell into place. He’s sweet, ambitious, funny, kindhearted, passionate, and just overall the best man I had ever met. He makes me so happy…
Oh who am I kidding? He’s perfect. He is everything I ever wanted. If I made a list of all of the qualities I wanted in a husband, he would check off every single box.
But the feelings I have had for him over the last year are nothing compared to what I had in one night for him. I find myself wishing his eyes were bright blue instead of dark brown. I wish his arms were around me instead of the ones around me right now. The butterflies from that night have stayed dormant ever since.
I don’t know what happened after that night. I honestly thought we had a good time that night. Conversations flowed seamlessly. We made each other laugh so hard we had tears running down our faces. The physical connection was there- at first he had his arm around my shoulders as we walked around town, but as time went on he slowly moved lower around my waist, eventually intertwining our hands together until we arrived back at our cars. He even said that he wanted to see me again.
But I never heard from him again after that one text message. No call, no text, not even a message from my friend’s boyfriend. Nothing. I was disappointed beyond belief. I didn’t think he was that guy: the type to ditch someone without any explanation or goodbye. I thought I understood him to be a gentleman. Everything I had read about him pointed to him being one of the purest humans in the world. This was the opposite of all of that.
From that day on, I’ve loathed him. He gave me the perfect evening and then cut me off cold turkey from anything further. I have a three strike rule. His first: he was late. His second: he tricked me into liking him. His third: he lied to me. Three strikes and he’s out.
I have tried not to look back since. It’s not without its difficulties though since he’s literally everywhere. On magazine covers, in commercials, movie trailers, streaming services- he’s there. Why did he have to be such a successful actor? If he weren’t, it would make for forgetting him that much easier.
No closure. No answers. Nothing.
The rehearsal dinner went smoothly the next night which hopefully was foreshadowing for the big day itself. 
A majority of us were standing around about to start when the doors loudly being opened drew everyone’s attention away from our milling about. A man stood in the middle of the doorway then strode in like he owned the place. The closer he got, the more the details of his face came into focus.
No. Freaking. Way.
I look toward my best friend. She looked like she wasn’t shocked he was late, but she knew he was coming. I creep up behind her and clear my throat. Instantly she cringed.
“Did you forget to tell me something?” I whisper to her.
She sends me an apologetic smile, “Well, I actually put off telling you ‘cause I didn’t know how you would react and then I meant to tell you last night but with the whole ‘I’m getting married in two days’ buzz took over and now the rehearsal is here-”
“Just please tell me I’m not walking in with him.” I beg.
She chuckles nervously before she escaped to go greet him with her fiancé.
I turn to her sister who is also one of my closest friends. “Did you know he was going to be a groomsman?”
The guilt written in her face tells me everything I need to know. “She made me promise not to tell you.”
I groan, “The loyalty level around here is staggeringly low.”
I head over to where my boyfriend is standing and take comfort in his arms before I have to deal with the man who broke my heart.
“Are you okay?” He asks a little confused by my actions.
I nod, “Just tired from last night.” He chuckles at the mention of the night before, squeezing me into his chest.
“Alright everyone! Time to get started.” The wedding coordinator beckons us all to the back entrance of the barn standing next to our corresponding wedding party member. I stand right in front of the Maid of Honor and Best Man. I kept my eyes forward focusing on anything but the guy who took his place next to me.
“It’s good to see you,” He murmurs to me over the instructions of the coordinator.
I scoff and roll my eyes. He has the nerve to say that to me after two years of silence. I imagined a million times what it would be like to see him again. I’d imagined a lot of screaming with possible hitting. Or I thought about the ever-effective, old fashioned silent treatment. He doesn’t deserve to know that our one night out together effected me so much and I’ve carried a rather large torch for him ever since. At the very moment, it will be the latter, but there’s no telling what tonight and tomorrow will bring.
“Now ladies, rest- don’t grab- your hand near the crook of his arm. Men, keep your arm at that angle with an open hand resting on your stomach- no fist. And don’t forget to smile- this is a happy day!” As quickly as he showed up, the coordinator was on to the bride and her father before either of us could register he was there.
I begrudgingly did as I was instructed, “resting” my hand on his bare forearm, holding a stand-in bouquet for the occasion in my other hand.
“Are you not going to talk to me?” He speaks again but I ignore him once more.
Thankfully that was when it was our turn to walk down the aisle. For the rest of the rehearsal, he didn’t get a chance to say anything else. As soon as we were done, I go straight for my boyfriend. I figured there’s no way he would approach me if I were with another man.
We all head to the restaurant afterwards to celebrate the last night before our friends begin their lives together as husband and wife. I keep my distance from Chris, always sticking close with my boyfriend.
The one moment I was alone was when I went to the bathroom. I thought for the few minutes I wouldn’t be in danger.
However I was wrong.
As soon as I step out an arm shot out in front of me. A very pale muscular arm.
“Are you seriously going to ignore me for the next two days?”
I duck under his arm fully planning on continuing what I set out to do.
“Y/N,” he grabs my arm, “will you please talk to me? What did I do to make you so mad at me?”
I whip around hopefully sending daggers his way. “Are you serious right now?”
“She finally speaks!” He exclaims.
“Because I cannot believe what I’m hearing. Like, I don’t think I heard you right.” All of the feelings I’ve been burying for two years were making their way up to the surface and I don’t think I can stop them. “We had a fantastic night. It was literally the best night of my life, it was the most comfortable with a guy that I had ever been. You made me laugh, you gave me butterflies, you helped me feel for the first time in years.” I try to swallow down the lump that was forming in my throat. “You told me you wanted to see me again. You made me excited for the future for once in my life… and then you took it away.”
With every second that passed, his expression got closer and closer to utter defeat: his shoulders slumped, his grip on my arm loosened, his jaw slowly unclenched, his eyebrows furrowed.
“You were late,” I hold up one finger, “You tricked me,” two fingers,” “You lied to me.” Three fingers were up and in front of his face for emphasis. “Three strikes and you’re out.”
I back away from him, having nothing more I wanted to say. As soon as I turned the corner, I felt liberated… for about five seconds. When that passed, devastation hit. For the last two years, I’ve held out hope- I tried not to- but I did, that maybe someday something could happen between us. That maybe, just maybe, we could pick up where we left off that night.
Now that the moment of confrontation has come and gone, I feel all the hope fade away. All of those possibilities I pictured have left the building. Being with him is no longer an option. I have my boyfriend who makes me happy, who gives me everything I could possibly want.
The rest of the night went on without another incident. Chris kept his distance. However, I could feel his eyes on me for every second that passed as we sat at the table. It was a relief when we finally left and could retreat back to our hotel rooms for the night. The bride and I got to stay in a suite that we’ll all be getting ready in in the morning. They wanted to uphold the “not seeing each other the night before the wedding,” even though they’ve lived with each other for a year and a half now.
On the wedding day, everything went according to plan. Everyone was on time to hair and make-up, pictures went flawlessly, the weather cooperated with everything, Chris didn’t attempt to talk to me at all- it was a perfect day to watch two people who love each other commit to the other for the rest of their lives.
But then came the reception. That’s when I knew apparently all bets would be off. The ceremony was over. Niceties would wear off as more and more alcohol is consumed. I was not looking forward to it.
We make our ridiculous entrances and take our seats at the head table. We eat then speeches were made. Lots of laughs were had as the Best Man dished on stories he had with the groom growing up, a few tears were shed at her sister’s after recounting the moment the bride knew he was the man of her dreams- overall I’d say they were a success.
Again, I felt his eyes on me, burning holes in the side of my head from the other side of the groom for the entire dining portion of the evening. I kept myself from glancing in his direction, instead focusing on the conversations with the bride’s sister next to me and my boyfriend who is across the way- anything not to meet his eyes.
Finally the DJ announces it was time for all to convene on the dancefloor after the specialty dances. I immediately see my boyfriend start to stand, knowing he’d been ready for this all night. I’d been looking forward to dancing with him all night as well, I even removed my shoes in anticipation. As I stand up, a hand is held out in front of me. I knew whose hand it was. I remember staring at it as he would rub his lips on our date. The strength of it as it intertwined with mine as we walked down the streets of our town, the safeness I felt as he squeezed it if he detected I was getting anxious around a group of people and I needed the reassurance. I knew that hand well, unfortunately.
“Dance with me?” He nearly whispers in my ear. I didn’t realize he was that close until I could feel said whisper on my neck. I contain the shiver that runs down my spine at how husky his voice is. God I’ve missed that…
No! I will not be enchanted by him again. He does not deserve me.
I exhale the breath I was holding, it comes out a lot harsher than I expected. “No, thank you.” I turn away from him, but his hand gently grabs my arm stopping me from going any further.
He whispers again, “He’s not good enough for you,” before walking away.
I’m frozen in place. I glare at his retreating back as he makes his way over to the bar. My mouth hangs open in disbelief. How dare he… How fucking dare he assume anything about me or my relationship. He doesn’t know anything about what our relationship is like. My boyfriend treats me so well, spoils me even though I know I don’t deserve it. He listens to me, he cares about me, and he makes me laugh until I cry- he’s everything I’ve wanted in a man. Chris is the one who had his chance and subsequently blew it. He has no right to judge or even comment on my relationship when he knows absolutely nothing about it.
I hurriedly make my way to my awaiting boyfriend and pull him onto the crowded dancefloor. “You okay?” He asks me, “Did he say something to upset you?”
“Nothing worth repeating.” All I wanted to do was forget about him and his irrelevant feelings towards my relationship…
…Except I couldn’t. His words rattled me. Does he see something I don’t? He told me on our date that he’s an excellent judge of character so he wouldn’t say something like that unless he got a bad feeling, right? Either that or he said it just to get under my skin and force me to talk to him. No matter the reason I hate him for it because my pride won’t let it stand.
I spot him leaning against the bar, staring directly at the two of us over the rim of his glass. His perfect eyebrow quirks up at the eye contact, that sets my blood to boiling. He thinks he’s so smug. I wish I could just slap that stupid hidden smirk right off his perfect face…
Following a few dances, I mutter something about him going to dance with the bride to my boyfriend before exiting the dancefloor. I rush out of the barn, away from the crowd needing some air from his suffocating gaze. I find a little lit area that’s perfect for pictures. There are rectangular hay bales set together as a makeshift U-shaped bench with some low watt bulbs strung up above between two poles. It would be serene if I weren’t already on edge.
After taking a few deep breaths, I finally feel like I can speak without yelling. “You had no right.”
I didn’t have to turn around to know he followed me out here. It’s exactly what I wanted him to do, just like it was his intention to get under my skin. As much as I wished to avoid this conversation it seems that we can’t go on without it. We may tear each other apart in the process, but this is my chance for closure. This is my only opportunity to get the answers I’ve been needing to move on for the past two years. Two years of wondering what went wrong after the most perfect date I’ve ever been on with an equally perfect man has been eating at my heart and mind. I hated always wondering “what if” or “what would I be doing right now if I were with him” especially when I started dating my boyfriend. I had no answers as to why those questions could not be. I thought with time I’d stop asking them, thinking I’d never see the man again. He’s a big movie star, why would he wonder about a woman he went on one date with?
As I expected, his deep baritone voice comes behind me, but his words do little to ease my nerves. In fact they set them off even more so than before. “I’m sorry.”
I scoff at his half-hearted apology, knowing he doesn’t mean it at all. “Oh bite me, Christopher.” I turn around to face him. God he looks even better out here. The subtle gold glow from the lights are complimenting his skin tone, they make his baby blues shine which just frustrates me more.
“Please, Y/N,-” He takes a step closer to me, but I won’t have that. 
“No,” I take a step back keeping the needed distance between us for fear I may strangle him. “I don’t want to hear any of your bullshit excuses. You had no right to pass judgment on a relationship that you know absolutely nothing about.”
He slips his hands into the pockets of his dress pants. “Oh, I’ve seen enough.”
“Really?” I jut my hip out, resting my hand on it. “In the two days you’ve been here, you think you’ve got us all figured out?”
“Yes,” he answers with conviction. 
My shaking hands clench into fists, trying my damnedest not to lose control. I entangle them into my hair as best as I can without ruining the work the hairstylist did this morning before running them down my face. He has some nerve. 
“We had one night. One night! One nearly perfect night together and suddenly that makes you an expert on what is good for me?”
“I wouldn’t say ‘an expert’-”
“I wouldn’t say anything!” I interrupt, “I never heard from you again. Now after two years, you come in here acting like you know anything about me or my relationship? Who do you think you are?”
“A man who made a mistake!” He snaps.
There was a long pause. I never expected to hear that from him. All these years I wanted to think the worst of him for leaving me hanging like that. He got my hopes up, thinking we may have a future together only for them to come crashing back down to Earth when he never contacted me again. I wondered and wondered if maybe I read the signals wrong. Maybe I took his flirting as more than it was. Maybe the small gestures like his arm around my shoulders, on the small of my back, or the hand holding were only him being friendly. I wracked my brain going over every single detail of the night to try and pinpoint a reason for him not to have called me afterwards. I found nothing, which was equally as frustrating.
“Alright, I made a mistake.” He moves to sit on one of the hay bales. He rests his elbows on his knees and buries his head in his hands, letting out a huge sigh. “God I wanted everything with you.”
Once again, I’m frozen by his words. He what? But that doesn’t make sense. His words and his actions don’t line up- how could that be?
He removes his hands from his face, staring at the grass. “After that night, I wanted it all. I wanted to settle down, get the house with a white picket fence in the suburbs, carry you through the threshold after our wedding day, bring our children home from the hospital, watch them grow until we’re old and gray. I wanted everything.”
My heart aches. All of that was exactly what I wanted, especially with him. I could feel the tears building behind my eyes, my heart breaking mourning the loss of what we could have had by now if he had only said something.
I also find my anger growing as well. If he felt all of that, why did he not contact me again? Why did he give me hope that our night out together could have been the start of something good and then taken it away just as quickly?
“But?” There had to be a “but” coming after his statement. Clearly something stopped him from pursuing the possibility of “us,” destroying any future we could have had.
He sighs, “but…” he finally looks up at me with more emotion in his eyes than I was expecting. There was contemplation, confusion, honesty, agony…
I look away. In an instant I knew what he was about to say. It makes complete sense. He was at the height of his career, shooting movie after movie all around the world for a majority of the year. How would he have had time to have a relationship mixed in with that? He couldn’t.
“Your career was more important,” I interject, “I get it. I do.” I couldn’t fault him for choosing work over someone he just met, no matter how much he claims to have liked me right off the bat. He was going to be busy. We probably wouldn’t have had a lot of time to see each other. It’s not like I could give up my career to follow him. Besides even if I could have, he wouldn’t want that. He said so himself. He wanted someone who was independent; who could do their own thing and not be enveloped in his crazy life.
He stands up and steps closer to me, “no, that wasn’t it. I promise you that wasn’t it.”
There’s that word. Promise. He promised we’d see each other again soon after our night together. But he broke that.
“Then what was it?” My voice cracks at the end. I can feel my reserves slipping the more he speaks. I didn’t realize how much I missed his voice until now. I haven’t seen any of the movies he’s been in the last few years. I have him and his hashtag blocked on all social media platforms so I don’t see anything of his on any of my timelines. My other friends think I don’t like him (only my best friend and her now husband know about our date). To hear it again brings back all of the good memories we made together in that short night and all of the emotions I’ve been holding back since. “I have been wracking my brain for years wondering what went wrong after that.”
“I got scared,” he finally admits the truth. “I got scared of how much I liked you and how much I wanted to protect you.”
“From what?”
“From me,” he casts his gaze down at his hands as he fidgets with them, “and my life. I didn’t want to subject you to the chaos that is my life. I know what my fans would do to you if we were in a relationship, I was trying to protect you from all of the ugly that being with me comes with.”
So that’s what he was afraid of? He was afraid our relationship would inevitably end exactly like his last one? His “fans” were horrible to her. They sent death threats to her and her family members, always commenting negatively on her social media pages all because she was dating him. I remember reading about it right after it happened. I knew that side of his fandom was toxic. But did I care? No. Did I think I couldn’t handle it? I honestly don’t know, but would I have been willing to deal with it for him? Yes. I would have given up anything to be with him. That’s precisely why he did what he did. He didn’t want me giving anything up for him because he knows I’d be giving up any semblance of privacy I had if I were in a public relationship with him.
If I had known these were the reasons why he ghosted me, I would have been broken hearted but I would have understood. Hell, I probably would have fallen more in love with him if I knew that, not fallen in loathe.
He continues, “I thought that if I never contacted you again, you could move on”- he clears his throat-“and find someone better than me who could give you the normal life you deserve. Which as much as I wish I couldn’t, I see that you have…” he pauses as if deciding whether he should keep speaking. When I don’t stop him, he does, “But I can’t help feeling like that could have been me.”
My slightly shaky hands cover his fidgeting ones. His hand moves until he’s intertwining our fingers together, palms touching. They fit perfectly together as if they were each other’s missing puzzle piece. His thumbs stroke mine sending warmth down my arms all the way down to my toes. The sparks I felt back then return with full force. He leans down, pressing his forehead against mine. My heart is beating out of my chest, I wouldn’t be surprised if he didn’t feel it in some way.
I feel my heart break in my chest. My lip quivers and the tears threaten to make themselves known. My only saving grace is the fact that he can’t see my face. I may lose it completely if he did.
His breath is coming out equally as shaky between us, he squeezes my hands as if he doesn’t want me to let go. Believe me, I don’t want to. I bring one of our interlocked hands up to my lips. I kiss the back of his hand because I can’t kiss him where I want to. I pull back just enough to see his beautiful baby blues that could have any woman in the world swoon. They were terribly bloodshot right now but that only made them more tragically breathtaking. I tear one of my hands out of his and bring it to his cheek. He leans into it, a tear drops into the crevices between the contact.
The barely above whisper that came out was all I could muster without having a total breakdown because he’s right. It could have been him. We could have been something great. We could have built a life together. We could have had it all. And it broke my heart into a million pieces knowing all of this could have been avoided if life had handed both of us different lives.
“It almost was.”
~*~
Taglist: @the-marvel-wars​ @elusive-beauty​ @drakesfiance @im-a-slut-for-an-accent​ @fantasy-is-my-reality​ @princess-evans-addict​
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thebeautyoffanfics · 4 years ago
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Stargazing <3 ft. Muichiro, Shinobu, Rengoku, Giyuu, Mitsuri, and Obanai!
a/n: I’m literally just grabbing some of my favorite Hashira and throwing together something short (once again late on a school night,,),,, I just want softness, and stargazing is like,, love in its purest form <3 these however, are terrible cheesy. I’m so sorry.
warnings: none <3
word count: 969
Muichiro Tokito <3
Really really likes stargazing. It’s peaceful, beautiful, and romantic while not being over-the-top. He probably prefers cloud-watching over stargazing, but, at the same time, stargazing is much easier on the eyes, since there’s no worries about the sun being too bright. Plus, even when the clouds cover the stars, they’re still there.
He once pointed that out- that the stars are there no matter what- and you couldn’t help but smile, telling him that it was just like the two of you. “Even when you don’t see me, even when I’m not there, I’m going to be there for you. I’ll even be cheering you on,” You said, glancing over at the boy. “That’s weird, (Y/N),” He sighed, eyes not moving from the sky. “It’s still a nice thought though, so… I appreciate it.”
Shinobu Kocho <3
Stargazing isn’t her favorite thing in the world, but seeing how happy you are to stare at the night sky makes it very worth it. She’ll admire the stars from time to time, mainly when you’re pointing out certain constellations or planets to her, but her interest in the sky ends there. She’ll instead spend the time admiring you, and teasing you a bit.
“Hey, (Y/N), how come you never look at me like that?” She joked, poking you gently. “Shinobu, I don’t know if I can muster an expression for how much I admire you,” You replied, glancing over at her. “Mhmm, how very cheesy. You’re so lucky to be cute,” She replied, patting your shoulder fondly. “And you’re so lucky I think you’re better than the stars, or else you’d be inside.” “Now, now, you know you couldn’t force me. I’d simply follow you until I got to see that awestruck expression of yours.”
Rengoku Kyojuro <3
I feel like Rengoku is much more of a day person, but he doesn’t necessarily dislike stargazing. In fact, he enjoys learning things about stars with you, and sometimes shares things about stars that he finds neat. He doesn’t have much of an inside voice to start with, so his bold, loud voice may “ruin the peacefulness” a bit, but his enthusiasm makes up for it tenfold.
“Passion is typically compared to that of the burning sun!” He said, crossing his arms. “It sure is,” You replied, knowing that he wasn’t finished with his statement, but that he wanted to make sure you were listening instead of spacing out. “However, if the sun is a star, then there are stars out there burning many times brighter than our sun! That in mind, shouldn’t the passion burning in our hearts instead be compared to that?” “That’s true… I suppose it’s a bit too late to change a saying though.” “Fair point!!”
Giyuu Tomioka <3
He didn’t understand the appeal until you asked if he wanted to join you. If it was anyone else, he would have declined, but he couldn’t tell you no. After doing it several times, he found himself really enjoying it. Even on missions, he found himself glancing at the stars and feeling a gentle fondness and peace. Plus, any time he caught a glimpse of the stars sparkling above his head, he was now reminded of you.
“I’m glad to have something that reminds me of you,” Giyuu spoke, staring in the direction completely opposite of you. “Oh?” You remarked, noticing his shyness and smiling to yourself at how he was probably wearing an adorable blush. There was no point in hiding it, since he blushed fairly often, and it was dark, but his pride was probably getting the best of him. “Yes… now, I can’t help but think of you when I see the sky… it’s… reassuring. Especially on missions. Thank you.” “AHh, don’t thank me for something so trivial as that- for what it’s worth, I can’t help but think of you whenever I see the sky as well.”
Mitsuri Kanroji <3
You already knew this queen loves stargazing. She nearly beat you to asking if she wanted to stargaze- it’s just so sweet to her. It’s peaceful, and the coolness of the night air gives the perfect excuse to cuddle a bit closer. It’s practically perfect!
“The only downside to stargazing is how cold it gets,” You sighed, huddling closer to Mitsuri. “The only downside to stargazing alone,” She correctly, resting her head against yours. You nodded, smiling at the sweet action and warmth that she gave off. “This is really nice…” She whispered, and you saw through your peripheral the way she stared fondly at the sky. Such a happy look on her face only amplified the joy you felt in that moment as you agreed with her. “It really is…”
Obanai Iguro <3
He pretended to be extremely uninterested when you asked, but he actually had little to no opinion on it. While you pulled gently on his haori, asking him several more times if he’d please go out and stargaze with you, he’d roll his eyes, muttering about how boring it would be. In reality, he wasn’t actually planning on not going, he just didn’t want to give in so easily. After a few moments of pestering, he gave an annoyed huff and stepped outside with you.
“You see those stars? They’re-” “I can’t tell which star you’re pointing at. There’s a billion in that direction, you know.” You blinked for a moment, pondering how on earth you could describe the star any better. “Okay…” You whispered, moving closer to the bandaged boy, “in the direction I’m pointing, do you see that brightest star?” “They’re all pretty bright, but sure.” “It’s part of a constellation! See, if you connect it to-” Obanai once again cut you off by placing a firm hand on your shoulder. “I’ve already seen constellations. You’re explaining it won’t make it appear any clearer, so don’t bother... I’d rather have a normal conversation.”
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nobutfredweasleytho · 3 years ago
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YOU JUST DON’T LISTEN(F.W)
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Summary: Fred’s ex girlfriend writes him a letter to explain the how him using her wrecked her emotionally.
Warnings: angst, like a lot of angst, depressed Y/N, mentions of self doubt, a little swearing, mentions of parents not loving correctly, used reader. Let me know if I missed anything.
A/N: Major thank you to Gabriella @onlyfreds for being an amazing person and encouraging me to write whatever this mess is. I am forever grateful to you
(The font is terrible Im sorry im just getting used to working on tumblr)
Fred Weasley checked the muggle clock on his nightstand. 10:30 AM. His mom will call him for breakfast anytime now. He has been awake for quite some time if he can even count the 30 minutes he tried to sleep but couldn’t, not when every time he tries to close his eyes his mind and eventually dreams are clouded by her. By the last time he looked at her, how devastated she looked, How her face was wet from her tears and her eyes bloodshot red, but the thing Fred will never be able to forget is her voice. How raw and vulnerable she sounded while saying the most horrible thing’s anyone has ever said to him, but he can’t blame her, he has no one to blame but himself because in the end it was he who caused all of this and now its come to bite him in the ass. He hears the door open and his twin brother George enters.
“Mom says breakfast is ready and she wants you downstairs. She says she’ll drag you herself if you don’t show up again today.”
“Tell her I’m not hungry and I’ll come grab a bite later.” I really don’t feel like being surrounded by other people right now. Not in this pathetic state I’m in. Besides it will take me willpower I don’t have to not hex Ron into oblivion.
“Well she will not take no for an answer and I wont either. What’s done is done now and you’ll have to face the world someday so start with your own family because everyone down there is worried sick about you and the least you can do is show your face once in a while so they know you haven’t died of starvation or sleep deprivation.” George has worry written all over him and I’m sure the rest of the family has it too. I feel even more like shit for worrying them.
“Fine. But I come back here if she is mentioned are we clear?”
“We weren’t gonna mention Y/N anyway now lets go moms worried sick for your dumbass.”
Breakfast was going smoothly with Ginny and Ron being exited for Quidditch season, Harry and Bill discussing the unfortunate events of the Triwizard tournament last year, dad asking Hermione about a rubber duck whatever that is, but the most shocking thing is mom asking me and George about the joke shop products. George is doing most of the talking but still the fact that shes even asking is awesome. I was finally feeling peaceful this whole winter break until I heard a hoot outside the window.
“I thought it was Tuesday but since mail is here does it mean its Friday already? Oh how fast time is going.
“No Arthur honey you are right it is Tuesday, Bill or George can one of you see if that owl has the owners name attached to it and bring whatever letter he has here to see who is it for.”
Bill got up from his seat and went to the window next to the countertop to look at the mystery owl. “Do we even know a Y/N Y/L/N?”
The room went quiet. The only thing that could be heard was the owls hoot asking for its treat. Bill seemed not to realise this as he took the letter from the owl, gave him a treat and sent it on its way.
“To Fred Weasley from Y/N Y/L/N… Who’s Y/N is she the girl you’ve been crying over this whole time huh Freddie?” Bill chuckled but I just grabbed the letter. I had no time to even be mad at him because once again my mind fogs up with only her. I couldn’t help but feel relieved and the happiest I felt in a long time. She has forgiven me. Y/N forgave me. That has to be it. Why else would she send me a letter?
“I had a great time with you guys but there’s important matters for me to attend so I have to go to now. Thanks mom the breakfast was amazing as always.” And with that I sprinted towards my room, locked the door and examined the letter in my hands. It was a bunch of them in here. I went to mine and George’s worktable threw some papers that were on top of it to make room for these letters and carefully opened the envelope.
The first thing that I grabbed was a photo. It was a polaroid of me and Y/N on the Gryffindor common room. Happiness filled my heart when I started remembering this night. I looked at the back of the polaroid and surely enough there was a writing on it.
Fred and Yn on the Gryffindor common room at 1 AM the night she turned 17. Listening to ABBA’s “Dancing Queen”. Picture taken by major 3rd wheel George Weasley.
Tears filled my eyes when I remember this night. It was the night I looked at her the way I always should have. Not as a replacement of someone who didn’t care about me.
The next one was also a polaroid photograph but this one I don’t remember being taken. It’s a picture of Y/N teaching me how to play the guitar. I can make up that we are in her dorm but not more as the picture is taken in black and white. I look at the back and surely this one also has a writing on it but the handwriting doesn’t look familiar at all.
A drunken Y/N accompanied by a even drunker Fred trying to play the guitar in the middle of the night. If I fail my charms exam tomorrow I’m killing you both but right now you two look adorable. Picture taken by Cho Chang.
The third one is an actual letter. I chuckle looking at the handwriting. Always so precise and not even one line out of place. I always thought Y/Ns handwriting always contradicts her hot headed persona but it’s actually really cute. I start reading the letter and my heart stops.
Dear Freddie,
I can only imagine the shock that receiving a letter from me would cause you right now especially after our last conversation.
But I have a lot to get off of my chest and I wont be able to move on if I haven’t said it all. Call me a coward but I was really scared to ask you to meet me so I can say it in person, but maybe that’s what I have always been. A coward. A coward because I get scared when someone wants to enter my life, a coward because I hate trying new things at the expense of failing, a coward because I should be able to confront people who brought darkness and sadness to my life.
But one thing I will admit Fred Weasley is that I wasn’t a coward when It came to loving you. It was the first time that I let someone come into my life and heart the way you did, and it will probably be the last. Throughout our “relationship” if you can even call it that as it was more of you customizing me to be her, to be someone I’m not. But that’s why you even talked to me is it, because I reminded you of her.
The signs were right in front of me and I feel stupid enough not to have seen them. But I guess people are right when they say love is blind. Love is such a funny thing to me as the first time I experienced the right kind of love was through you. But that was me creating stuff in my head. You didn’t love me no, you loved the idea of me. But I loved you. I loved you more than anything or anyone I have ever loved, I loved everything about you. But you just don’t listen. You don’t listen to anyone around you. Not George, not your other siblings, not Lee or any of your other friends for that matter, not your professors, but most importantly you don’t listen to me.
You didn’t listen when I told you that the love my parents gave me was only because I reminded them of my brother, the love my old friends back home gave me was one of interest. Everywhere I go no matter who I talk to no one will love me for me. I came to accept that until I met you.
You were funny and crazy and brave and oh so gorgeous. You were basically everything I looked for in… well everything. In a friend or in a partner it doesn’t matter. I thought you saw me for who I am. A broken teenager with issues but that at the end of the day was deserving of love. Oh how wrong I have been but no more wrong than you. You knew this but you just didn’t listen.
That makes us both horrible people now does it. Me who thought you were some kind of savior or some kind of saint and selfishly wrapped myself around your love and you who used me because I remind you of your ex girlfriend who broke your heart. But mine is excused I feel like and yours isn’t.
You would have kept me going for who knows how long just so you can live your imaginations you had for someone else.
Did you think about her the first time we slept together?
Was I not enough for you Freddie?
Was I too clingy too soon?
Is it my hot temper that gets the best of me?
So many questions will be left unanswered on my end because frankly, I never want to speak of you again. Sure I am deprived of love but I will not take it if its not directed directly at me.
I still care about you and will continue to support you and George on whatever you set your mind into. I was waking through Diagon Alley last week and saw this little store with a “for sale” sign. It’s right in the middle of Diagon Alley. I hate how my first thought went that you would have loved it but I seem to do that a lot recently.
I’ll get dressed and think would Fred love this skirt or this shirt.
I start applying lipstick and I’ll think will Fred love this color.
I start eating and I’ll think does this look good enough that Fred would’ve stolen a piece of it when I’m talking to Ginny.
I don’t even know why I am telling you this. How pathetic I’ve become clinging into someone that doesn’t want me.
Anyway I’ve probably bored you enough with my ranting but I wouldn’t have been able to move on unless I said everything that felt heavy on my heart. I also attached some photos I thought you’d like to keep seeing as now you can see yourself with Kayla without having the burden to be near me.
Say hi to your siblings and Harry for me.
Have a nice life,
Y/N
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h0rnyshakespeare · 3 years ago
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could you do a fantasy au with bakugou as a kitsune? you’ve just recently moved into a cottage in the woods to get away from your previous life, when you stubble across baku in a trap surrounded by hunters! you of course aren’t going to let some assholes hurt an innocent creature, so you devise a plan to get him free. you draw the hunter’s attention away from the caged baku, causing them to run off. you then get to baku, and are able to free him. though a slight problem, the hunters are coming back, and they see you messing with their ‘find.’ while you’re frozen in place, baku literally picks you up, and jumps into the trees, evading gunshots. he keeps you there until the hunters go away.
after all this drama, you start hanging out with the kitsune more and more. you two get closer as time goes on, and bakugou becomes more and more infatuated and protective of you. he’s touchier, softer, and overall more gentle with you. he even lets you touch his ears and tail. everything is all well and good when oh no, the hunters are back, and they’re out for revenge. while you’re at the cottage, they ransack your home, chasing you out into the woods. you’re sprinting, calling for bakugou as the hunters are gaining. just then, none other than the fox himself jumps in and beats the absolute shit outta the hunters. he then turns to you, worry as well as rage in his eyes. he sees they’ve hurt you, and that’s the final nail in the coffin for what he’s about to do. “Stay with me.” he pleads. “you don’t have a safe home anymore, and even if you did, i can’t promise your safety. i NEED you to be safe, okay. stay with me as my mate. i’ll hunt for you. i’ll protect you. anything, and you’ve got it.” you’re stunned. eyes wide, you ask him why. why does he care so much? nobody else ever did, so why does he, as powerful and as beautiful as he is. the answer isn’t as hard as you would think “it’s because i fucking love you...”
OKAY this is definitely long and more of a vent than anything but i think it’s so cute! just imagine cuddling with him as soft and as cute as he would be, hanging over you like a jungle cat. very nice, very nice indeed
kitsune!Bakugou x gn!reader (I couldn't think of a title, sorry)
Genre: Fantasy
Warnings: Swearing caz Bakugou, brief mentions of gunshots (that’s it I think?? But if there’s anything I missed please let me know)
Word Count: 2.5k
A/N: Tysm for requesting, this was such a cute idea! I’m sorry this took some time, exams are coming so my writing’s a little slow haha. I wrote this to be gn!reader but if anywhere implies otherwise please let me know :) And to everyone else who requested, I’m working on them!
Y/N: Your name
L/N: Last name
You had recently moved into a little cottage in the woods, not too far away from the main city, but enough to be away from the busy, commercial life you once lived. Others might disagree, but you felt more at peace among nature, like you were truly satisfied. You had never enjoyed living among many people, so you were excited to start your new life, out here in the woods. As you walked back to your cottage after taking a walk to familiarize yourself with your new surroundings, you heard a few voices up ahead. You groaned, not wanting to socialize with anyone, but before you could turn to take a different route to avoid whoever was there, you overheard one of the voices say, “We’re gonna get a fine amount of money for this creature’s fur, ya hear me? So make sure the trap is secure.” A couple of other voices mumbled in agreement. You frowned. Although you could not really make out what animal they had caught, you did know that whatever they were doing, it sounded illegal. You sighed. You did not want to confront anyone, but you made your way towards the voices. You saw three men surrounding a cage, holding… guns? “What have I gotten myself into?” you internally groaned, but it was too late to turn back now. “Um, excuse me?” you called out hesitantly. They turned at the sound of your voice, looking displeased. You smiled nervously. “Hi, um, it’s actually illegal to hunt in this area…” you trailed off, seeing their annoyance. “How would you know, you little punk? Go braid daisy crowns or whatever you do in this dump,” one of them sneered at you. You were slowly growing irritated, but you kept the smile on your face, determining to help whatever animal they had imprisoned. “Ok, well, I was going to let you know that if you walk a few miles from here, there is a hunting area. You guys aren’t the first hunters I’ve seen around here,” you lied through your teeth, trying to distract them to give you enough time to release the trapped creature. “If you check it out, I’ll forget I even saw you guys here, and no one will know that y’all were hunting illegally, ok? Plus, I’ve seen a lot of finer animals in that area.” “Maybe we should listen to her, boss,” one of the hunters said to the one who had spoken to you first. “I mean, it is just a fox, and if we’re caught…” he whispered the rest of his sentence to their leader, who in turn frowned. “Fuck, whatever. How far is the hunting area, kid?” he asked, the question directed to you. “Oh, um, about… 10 miles from here? In that direction,” you said, pointing. “You better not be lying to us,” the hunter glared at you, making you gulp. You tried to act nonchalant until they were out of sight, then immediately rushed to the trap. You gasped when you saw a beautiful fox with… tan, almost golden fur. You had never even heard of foxes that colour. The hunters were idiotic to listen to you and leave this amazing creature, but you were glad they did. The fox made a low, growling noise, snapping you out of your trance. “Ah, right, I’m sorry, I’ll let you out now, don’t worry,” you said, suddenly feeling stupid that you were conversing with an animal. You quickly set your attention onto setting it free. The trap looked complicated to deactivate, but you realized it was actually quite simple, and you managed to free the fox in no time. “There you go,” you smiled, “You’re free now.” Surprisingly, the fox lingered, studying you with beautiful carmine eyes. First tan fur, now red eyes? “You’re like something outta a fairy tale, huh? So pretty,” you said softly, gazing at it at wonder, when you heard distant voices shouting.
Crap. The hunters.
“You really thought you could fool us! There were no animals in that area!” “Ahaha fuck, I’m in trouble,” you murmured, thinking of a way to escape, when you remembered the fox was still here! “Hey uh, you really should get outta here-” you said, turning to find not a fox, but a man with fox ears and a- no wait, nine tails. Your eyes widened, freezing as you tried to process what just happened.
“Oi, dumbass, if you’re not gonna run they’re gonna get you, you know.”
“I- uhhh… well this is a weird dream,” you chuckled nervously. “Tch, idiot,” was all he said before picking you up bridal-style and running faster than the hunters could catch up. You felt something whizz past your ear. “HOLY FU- THEY’RE SHOOTING AT US!” you yelled, grabbing at the man’s collar. “Thanks for stating the obvious, dumbass!” he yelled back. “Now would you shut up so I can focus on not dying?” You quickly turned silent after that statement. Without warning the… man? fox? man fox?? suddenly took a huge leap into the trees, landing on a branch that somehow held his weight. You yelped, then quickly covered your mouth in order to keep quiet as you saw the hunters running past from underneath. “They’re gone now,” you heard the man speak as he set you down on the branch. The tree you both were on was sturdy, giving you a secure foothold. You turned to face him. “Uh, thanks for saving me back there, but I’m pretty sure you were a fox when I first saw you��?” “Tch. Humans really have gotten dumber over the past few years haven’t they. I’m a kitsune. Ya know what that is?” Your eyes widened. “A-a kitsune as in the ones in the fairy tales? The foxes who can shapeshift to humans, and have many tails…” you trailed off, feeling stupid that you had not noticed earlier. The kitsune smirked in response. “Yeah, and I have nine, meaning I’m the most powerful. You’re lucky I was there to save you.” “You saved me? Who was trapped in a cage, huh? If anything, you should be thanking me,” you huffed, annoyed. Who did he think he was? He said nothing, simply gazing at you with interest written all over the flaming pools of scarlet that were his eyes. You tried not to feel intimidated by them, not knowing what powers this creature possessed. You could not deny that he was beautiful as a human, alluring even, with blonde hair similar to his fox fur, and his body looked as if it were sculpted by gods. You gulped, forcing yourself to stop staring at all the scars scattering his bare chest. He smirked as if he knew exactly what you were thinking of, causing your face to heat up. “Where do you live, dumbass? I’m sure you can’t climb down trees.” You rolled your eyes, embarrassed that he was right. “Not far from here, I’ll manage.” “Don’t be ridiculous,” was all he said before he lifted you in his arms again, leaping to the ground and taking you home in no time. “I didn’t even give you directions,” you said, confused. He sighed. “I could smell your scent from here. Why do you live in the middle of the forest?” “Caz I want to??” you said. “That’s weird,” he responded. “Don’t you live here too though?” you retorted. You saw a smirk flicker briefly on his face before being replaced again with his bored expression. “I’ll see you around then, dumbass.” He said, turning to leave. “Wait!” you called out, immediately regretting it. Why’d I do that? But there was no time to question your actions as he looked at you, eyebrow raised. “Uh, I-I just wanted to know your name,” you said a little breathlessly. “Katsuki Bakugou,” he said, never breaking eye contact. “Bakugou, huh? Well, I’m Y/N L/N,” you replied. Bakugou shrugged. “I’ll be leaving then dumbass.” You huffed. “I literally just told you my name!” “And?” was all he said, before vanishing through the foliage of trees. You exhaled slowly, feeling a little disoriented. You had so many questions but decided not to think too much of the day’s events, instead opting for relaxing in your new home.
The next day, you decided to just hang out at home, yet you could not get the kitsune out of your mind, making you frustrated. “Ah, fuck it,” you mumbled, before heading out. You were not sure where you were going, but you walked in the same direction you did yesterday. “What are you doing this you idiot? What if the hunters find you again?” you thought, yet your body did not listen, continuing to walk in the same path. You did not run into anyone on the way. Unfortunately, that included Bakugou. You decided to just sit down under a tree and read the book you had brought with you. You had been peacefully reading for a while, the sounds of the forest soothing to you ears.
“Well fancy seeing you here.” You whipped your head at the sound of his voice. You saw the fox with tan fur you rescued yesterday. “Bakugou?” He transformed into his human form, grinning as he did so. “So, what’re you doing here, dumbass? Missed me?” You rolled your eyes. “You wish. I came here to relax for a bit.” “Whatever you say, dumbass. What’re you reading?” You showed him your book, causing him to snort. “What?” you asked, slightly irritated. What was his deal? “Your taste is so bland, I’m not surprised.” “Fuck off,” you responded. “As if you’ve ever even touched a book before.” “I have,” Bakugou said, raising his eyebrows. “Didn’t peg you as the type to read,” you said, getting back to your book. “Is that all modern-day kitsunes do these days?” Bakugou shrugged. “I’ve never met any others here.” You looked back at him, surprised. “So… you’re alone?” “Tch. I just prefer to be by myself.” You nodded. “Me too.” “Pfft, you? You look like someone who would love being around people, with how much you talk and all.” You glared at him. “And this is exactly why I like being on my own.” He raised his arms. “I guess I’ll leave then. Since you seem to really hate company, right dumbass?” “My name is not dumbass, it’s Y/N. Why’re you so rude?” you hissed. You were met with silence when you realized he had left. You could not believe you actually came out all this way just to talk to him, only for him to randomly leave mid-conversation. You huffed, shifting your position to get more comfortable. “I’m still here you know.” You jumped, hearing his voice from above you. “What the hell?” He snorted in amusement. “You really think you could get rid of me that easily, dumbass?” You rolled your eyes, but inside you felt secretly happy that he had stayed, and you hated it. “You’re so annoying,” you retorted, turning a page in your book, yet somehow not really seeing the words. It was quiet for a while, before Bakugou jumped back down to the ground, sitting next to you. “Read that for me,” he said in a tone unlike his usual one. “What?” “You seem to like this trash so much, so read it,” he said, making himself comfortable. You sighed. “Fine.”
And so began the afternoons you would spend with him. Every day, you would meet him under the same tree and read. Sometimes he would fall asleep next to you, exposing a more soft and vulnerable side of him, contrasting to his normally brash and rough personality. It was pretty sweet, and over time, your feelings for him only grew. You were not sure, but you felt that he too had become softer and gentler around you as time went on. He even let you pet his ears, blushing whenever you did so, trying to hide his flusteredness behind his colourful words. He even went as far as falling asleep on your lap in wolf-form, making you happy he could trust you with the more vulnerable side of him.
You were at home, about to leave to meet Bakugou, when you heard some commotion outside. You were about to check when you heard the door break open. “Find them!” you heard a loud voice say. Your blood ran cold. The hunters? Why were they so set on revenge? You heard something break as they stormed through your house. Before you could grab something to defend yourself, one of them burst into your room, causing you to freeze. “There you fucking are,” he said moving towards you, blocking the exit. Thinking fast, you opened the window next to you and jumped out. Thankfully, it was close to the ground, so you easily picked yourself up and you ran, not daring to look back, but you heard them shouting and running after you. You sprinted down the familiar path, calling for Bakugou as you did. “Goddammit, where are you Bakugou?” you yelled as the hunters gained on you, when-
“The HELL you fuckers think you’re doing, HAH?”
You had never felt so relieved to hear his voice. “Bakugou!” “Stay behind me,” was all he said before going absolutely feral. He beat them up in no time, then watched as they ran away in terror. When he made sure they were gone, he turned to you, anger dissipating, his eyes filled with worry. “You ok?” You nodded weakly, then raised your arm, showing him the wound you had gotten when one of the hunters had shot at you. “It’s not bad, don’t worry. The bullet didn’t hit me, just grazed my skin.” “Shit,” Bakugou cursed as he took your arm in his hand, examining it. “That’s definitely more than a fucking graze.” “It’ll heal, I’m good at first aid,” you said. Bakugou looked at you, incredulous. “Dumbass, this needs more than first aid, are you really that stupid? Don’t move,” he said as his hands began to glow. He positioned them above your wound, using his power to heal you. “Thanks, Bakugou,” you said when he was done. “Really, I appreciate everything.” “Katsuki,” he said, not looking at you. “Huh?” you said, confused. “Call me Katsuki, dumbass.” A playful smile made its way on your lips. “Sure, when you call me Y/N.” He chuckled, then looked at you with a serious gaze. “I want you to stay with me.” You looked at him, dumbfounded. “W-What? What do you mean?” “Your home isn’t safe anymore. Those hunters could come back anytime, I went easy on them. I need you to be safe, Y/N, I-” he ran his fingers through his hair in frustration. “What would’ve happened to you if I wasn’t there? Just… please, become my mate Y/N. I’ll do anything for you, I’ll hunt for you, protect you, anything you want.” You were stunned, trying to process what he had just asked. “Y-You want me to be your… your mate? Why? And why would someone like you care so much about someone like me when no one really ever has?” He blushed, looking away to glare at the grass. “Fuck, I don’t know, maybe it’s caz I fucking love you, dumbass.”
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lovely-necromancy · 3 years ago
Text
A Cure for Insomnia CH 1.
This is a reader insert I originally started posting on AO3. I’m cross posting here because I know some of the fandom still lives here.
Quick Disclaimer:
This is a fic I'm writing for my own comfort.
I was inspired by RaeBees (you can check out their works over on Quotev and AO3), and how they characterize the "proxies". Having always seen the characters different than most of the fandom I've interacted with I never really shared my thoughts until now. This work is only placed in the Creepypasta tag so it reaches its demographic. However, I am fully aware of the fact that no main character is considered a Pasta.
It may also appear to lean more Toby X Protag in the beginning but end goal is protag with all three, and Brian and Tim already in a relationship. How I picture it now is a slowburn but Toby and Protag will be in a friends with benefits relationship before either has any feelings, so I think that counts. Some may be confused by the asexual protag tag but it'll be explained in story, as an Ace myself I get frustrated with media that only show one version and say it goes for us all. That being said I don't represent the whole Ace community but I hope to provide a bit more representation for some others out there.
Protag will be depicted as agender, and will have a few tics that stem from their Autism. Again I don't speak for any others with Autism but I hope to provide some representation for those in similar positions.
Tags will be updated as the story progresses. Canon-Typical violence and mental health issues are to be expected if you feel uncomfortable with those aspects I advise you to not engage. This story will also have a lot of NSFW themes and scenes so I highly discourage anyone under the age of 18 from viewing this work. You will get warnings on chapters with NSFW and I will make it skippable as well.
I'm also very nitpicky and gave the main characters birthdays just because it irritates me when it gets mentioned once and you have to do the math or imagine your own conversation when a birthday was too close to a character's.
Tim January 1st, home state Alabama
Toby April 28th, home state Virginia (saw this years ago no clue if it's accurate)
Protag May 13th, home state Virginia
Brian May 23rd, home state Alabama
Connor the service dog July 18th, home state Kentucky
I've referred to Protag as Protag here but in story they're referred to as YN.
Everything felt impossibly dull; your senses, the dark room you're currently in, the noise coming from the fan just to the left of the bed on which you laid. Turning to the window beside your head you stare out into that weird midnight summer sky. More of a gray than a true dark blue night, cast in an orange glow that made the night seem closer to day than it truly was. While the time was just half past twelve, you felt it may have been more accurate to say it was closer to four in the morning.
You're exhausted but that true sort of exhaustion where whatever energy you have left buzzes all around. It consumes your entire being, dances between being deafeningly loud in your ears to giving you twitches in your legs. You'd laid down hours ago thinking you'd be tired enough to sleep once your tics started to spasm in closer intervals, but to no avail were you able to rest. That buzzing preventing you from dreamland. Maybe the hum of your body was right, you didn't really need to sleep, you just wanted it to feel normal.
Knowing the battle had already been lost you push yourself off the bed and grab a pair of shorts off the floor. Slipping them on you contemplate your options for the night. Going into town was out since it was Sunday...well Monday now, but there would be nothing but bars open and you were never one for drinking. And as fun as a drive sounds right now, you feel the buzzing in your bones grow stronger, you need to move. A late night hike should keep you occupied, with it being so quiet and the middle of the night you wouldn't even have to take your headphones to cancel out the sounds of other people, you aren't likely to run into many people tonight.
Deciding on a hike you grab a mask and car keys and make your way to your yellow Kia Soul. A going away present from your parents that they gave you the moment you got your driver's license after your 24th birthday. Having anxiety throughout your life you'd never been in the head space to start driving till later on, and while you still don't enjoy driving you are pretty good at it even with your “late” start. Surfing through radio stations as you let the car warm up you find your latest obsession, it's a conspiracy theory podcast that someone in Kepler managed to blast through the limited air ways of the town. Impressive considering Kepler was in a radio quiet zone and even cell phones couldn't work in the small town, luckily you lived just outside of the zone so you could send texts and call your parents every weekend.
It seemed today's episode was a rerun, Mothman: Murderer, Man, or Myth. It was actually one of your favorites, the paranormal stories tended to be more entertaining than hearing about how a man could murder sixteen people while working as a cop ruining evidence to lead the others off his trail. Humans could be more vial and cruel than any little gray alien from the future or tall Fresno Nightcrawler could ever be. And they weren't as entertaining to hear about, nor were their exploits as impressive. You could always see patterns, either connecting clues first or finding connections no one else saw, it was never hard to tell where a certain case would lead so you'd always end up disappointed in humanity when they overlooked such obvious clues. Though that often led you down a path of deep diving for information to see just how obvious it was, more often than not you'd find that the most logical conclusion was shady public officers. After investigating so many cold cases you're sure if you're ever in trouble you'll never involve the police, in the end they'd probably just ignore you and rule your case closed if anything ever did happen to you.
'I'd haunt them if they did.' You decide and you shift gears and begin driving to the Monongahela National Forest, as the timeline of Mothman sightings and events play out before for your ears.
Instead of going through town and possibly loosing the signal of the show, you drive on the old dirt road that runs along the very edge of the town, partially covered in trees. This over grown road is the main reason Kepler doesn't see many visitors, the second someone makes their way onto it coming off the interstate they floor it until they see civilization. Over the few months you've been here you've nearly been run right off the road by spooked tourists, trying to escape whatever ghouls their wild imaginations created. The only real thing on this road was a mini mart gas station, and even though it was shady as hell the cashier didn't bug you too much when you came in in the dead of night. Plus they had a cat, how could you not stop in and say hi to little ole Magnolia?
Speaking of which you should probably get a drink for your hike, you could already feel your throat drying out. Turning into the parking lot you're happy to see no other cars around, putting your face mask on you make your way inside. As usual the store is dead at this time, and Ronnie is manning the desk. What's unusual is the man also behind the counter, he has dark brown hair that he's tied into a small and low ponytail, thick sideburns frame his face. You immediately take note of the slight imperfections of his face, most would see the slit in his eyebrow as following the current trend or even just a genetic thing, but you can see the slightly off color of a healed scar that starts just above his eyebrow and ends mid eyelid, he has a few smaller discolorations on his crooked nose, you'd guess he's had it broken at least twice.
Briefly taking a glance to his brown eyes before looking away, today is not an eye contact day. Nodding in their directions, the best acknowledgment you can give right now, you make your way to the freezers. From the freezer section you can hear Ronnie “explain” you.
“That's YN, a regular mainly at night though. A bit skittish and rarely ever says more than 'thanks have a nice day'” Even though she's whispering you can hear everything. Including the high octave her voice takes to mimic you, it feels more like mocking.
If being mocked hadn't already put you on edge the eyes boring into you have. The eyes may not be roaming over your body but the icky crawling of your skin sure makes it feel that way. The feeling of being put under a microscope has always made you sick, the stares, the leers and sneers, and the judgment just makes you want to implode on the spot. Cease existence, be swallowed into the abyss. You're about to set yourself into an anxiety attack with all these thoughts.
'Mask, mask, mask' you repeat over and over in your head, it's the only thing you can focus on. You are wearing a mask, there is one thing they can't perceive, the face is the most important for humans to perceive, your mask protects you.
Without looking you pull a water bottle from the cooler. You don't think you like this brand but the sports mouth makes up for it, and you can't focus enough to grab another. As the imaginary spiders crawl their way under your skin and your breath hitches you make your way over to the counter head down, never looking up at the employees beyond the counter. Your vision is blurring in time with the beating of your heart, you can't tell if it's due to nerves or from being up for five days in a row.
“Hey YN, how're you?” Ronnie asks, her tone is different from the past times you've been in. It's higher and has a lilt in it that you'd expect from a teasing friend. But Ronnie isn't a friend and has never spoken to you like this, you hate it. You nod to politely move on with the process, between the crawling of your skin and the buzzing underneath it you feel sick. And you're now very aware of the existence of your eyelids, you try to focus on ignoring that awareness. You need to move.
“Hmm, that's good. Anyway this is Tim! He's just started so go easy on him.” you hear the sound of a hand hitting fabric and assume she's patted Tim's shoulder as she introduced Tim to you. Why was she doing this, what purpose could introducing you two have? You nod again, was anyone going to ring you out?
“Hi, this all?” a deep voice asked, it isn't extremely deep more of a standard baritone that has a slight raspy quality, probably a reformed smoker. You don't smell cigarettes currently so he could've quit after years. Unfortunately despite your efforts to stave them off your blinking tics emerge. Making it difficult to keep your eyes open for longer than a nano second.
Startled and ticcing you look up and catch his eyes, you see pity in them, before casting your glance back to the counter. You can never tell what's worse people seeing you as weird or seeing you as something needing to be fixed. Nodding again, Tim tells you the total; a dollar fifty eight, and you hand him two dollars from your wallet.
Tim doesn't ask if you want the receipt or a bag, he prints out the receipt and hands you your change. The change goes immediately into the cat food fund for Magnolia. She got diagnosed with diabetes about a month ago and having worked in shelters and pet stores you know just how expensive her prescription food is. After folding the receipt into your wallet, Tim gently slides the water bottle over to you.
“Have a good night.” he says it so low and gentle, as if he thinks you'll shatter in front of him. As kind as the gesture seems, you aren't that fragile...or maybe you are if you have to keep repeating 'mask' over and over in your head to ground yourself. With a final nod you turn and make your way to the door, and just as you open it you hear Ronnie call out.
“Awwww, c'mon YN at least say 'Hi' to Tim.” You really don't like how she squeaked out 'hi'.
Taking a deep breath you prepare yourself, you'll show them both you can do this simple task. Even if you can't stop blinking long enough to see straight. Once you've steadied yourself you turn and look at Tim. He's sending you a look that says 'You don't have to' all that's missing is a slow head shake to complete his unease with this “peer pressure”.
But you can do this you can say 'Hi, Tim.' Two words super simple, nothing complex like 'Hi, Tim, nice to meet you.' and so much better than the option of your next meeting saying 'Hi, Tim. Sorry for spazzing out the other night.'. Yup you can do this just breathe, you open your mouth and...and you've forgotten what to say. Looking like a deer in headlights, well at least the tics stopped, you say the first thing that pops in.
“Mask.” You've said it loud and clear both cashiers heard you.
Tim stares with wide eyes and you see Ronnie failing to hide her laughter. Out of all the ways this could've gone this was probably the best outcome for her. The blinking has started up again, this time growing more frequent. You can't even hold your eyes open, to the two cashiers it must look like you're in pain or crying. And while you want to die of embarrassment, crying is a bit of an extreme for you.
So with red face and the inability to see you leave through the door, and try to make your way back to your car. Once in you lock the doors, switch the car on, and rest your head on the steering wheel. Out of every way this stop could've gone, being perceived by a new comer and Ronnie was not what you expected. While this hadn't been the worst five minutes or so of your life, it definitely would be another thing keeping you up at night for the next twenty years.
Calming down in the cool quiet dark of your car your slowly brought back to the world by the beginning of a new episode. This one talking about the Tailypo legend. A favorite story of yours from when you were a kid living on the coast of Virginia. So with yet another deep breath and the wave of nostalgia, you pull out of the parking lot and slowly coast down the old dirt road. Heading yet again for the Monongahela forest.
It's nearly two in the morning when you roll up to see an RV parked by the forgotten entrance of the park. It isn't surprising at all to find an RV out here since the Monongahela Forest is one of the most beautiful parks you've ever been to. You also don't think anything of them being parked by this unused entrance because you use it all the time since finding it accidentally. Figuring they just wanted to camp and be left to their own devices rather than use the RV sites and be bothered with other campers here for the summer.
Climbing out of your car you notice the RV isn't new by any means but it isn't a total rust bucket either, looks like it's been passed around throughout the years. There isn't anything to suggest it's been here a while, nothing left set up outside, must have just gotten into town then. You do happen to notice dog tracks around the sandy dirt you've parked in, good to know they have a dog before you slammed your car door. Closing the door gently behind you so you don't startle a pup and wake up it's owner or owners, you make your way through the woods. No real direction in mind, with no real thought in your head. Just the thought of moving and to keep on moving.
You could walk the same path every time you came through and always find something different. In fact that's exactly what happens, you're almost positive that you've deepened the imprint of the path just from walking through several times a week. Following the same winding path you usually do, climbing over the fallen tree, and through a scattering of blueberry thicket's you find yourself on the edge of one of the forest's many streams. It's your favorite spot in the forest so far, and about as far as you've gotten considering these hikes of yours take place during the dead of night.
The wind picks up and sends a chill through you, taking that as a sign you slide down to sit by the stream. Vans placed to your side as you sink your feet into the cool water. It's peaceful out here, so cool, and quiet, save for the slight noises the stream makes, various bubbling and drips. You try to think on things like your recent move, your job, the embarrassing 'mask' incident, just life in general. But you can't seem to form a single thought, this happens a lot, you've recently been conscious of the fact that you've been running on auto pilot for the past two months, hell a lot longer than that. You think everyone must get like this from time to time, but you think you've always been this way. Keen to dissociating and slipping in and out of existence.
It's quite nice really, except for the times like right now where you'd love to figure out why the silence in your head is so painfully loud. The more you think on it the louder it gets and the stronger the buzzing under your skin feels. And right now the static in your mind has been getting louder and louder for the past few minutes. You feel your head jerk to the right of it's own accord, moving back in place it happens for a second time, and then a third, then jerks up, before jerking a forth time to the right effectively cracking you neck.
“There we go.” you mumble, you can relax a bit as the verbal tic indicates the end of this round of tics.
Sighing you look at the sky...that can't be right. The sky has been painted it's fresh baby blues for the day, but again that can't be right. You just got to the stream, that path is a thirty minute walk meaning it should be just about two thirty in the morning, but the sky suggests it's five or six at the latest. Reaching for your water bottle you find it empty next to you. You didn't fall asleep you know that much, perhaps you did dissociate tonight. Well this hike was disappointing if you knew you were going to dissociate you'd have saved yourself that embarrassment and stayed home. Maybe done some painting or tidied up.
Sighing you push yourself off the ground, collecting you vans you're about to put them on when you notice a figure off in the distance. You freeze out of shock and stare at the figure, it stares back. The figure is about ten yards away, god your near sighted ass should really remember to not leave your glasses in the car when hiking. The figure starts to make it's way to you and after a few steps you realize it hasn't moved from it's spot. Rolling your eyes you ignore the hallucination.
You'd really needed to get sleep last night, today is day six of no sleep and though you haven't had many episodes these past few days, you have a feeling they'll start to get more prominent today. Hopefully tonight you can manage to get some rest, the longer you go without sleep the more realistic the hallucinations become. But for today you're content with the knowledge that it's just shadow like beings that you'll be seeing.
After putting on your shoes you start the thirty minute hike back to your car. You're thankful for the weather in Kepler, nothing like back on the coast. Here you can go for a morning hike through the forest while a gentle breeze passes by and the sun starts to give the area a pleasant warmth. Back on the coast you couldn't run and grab the mail without getting drenched in moisture from either sweat, humidity, or a mixture of both.  The coast sucks, hell Virginia sucks altogether, you're glad to be in Kepler.
“I want to go home, home.” you say out of nowhere.
Before you reach the entrance you hear barking, oh the RV campers must be up. Should you be careful not to scare them, or just walk normally and say 'Good morning' in passing, maybe just nod your head in greeting. Oh and you've stopped just beside the entrance as you got lost in your rambling. You didn't mean to come to a stop here, and as you try to move you notice how silent it's gotten. Did the dog go inside, maybe they've already passed...no it's too quiet for that. No the silence is oppressive like the one you deal with nightly, there's a reason for the silence. The situation's making you feel uneasy, but that could be the sleep deprivation talking.
You're about to brush it off and move when you hear a whispered, “Seriously man, I don't think anyone's out there. Let's get inside.”
There's a noise of agreement before you hear shuffling. Oh no, you zoned out and now you look like a weirdo stalker. Just perfect, maybe if you wait around a little more you'll seem more normal or at least feel normal. Not knowing how long to wait you walk along the tree line for a bit, looking at the ground as you do making sure you won't step on any snakes. In you quest to not step on any snakes you spot something suspiciously off white. It seems purposefully buried under a dead blueberry bush and some fallen branches.
Having listened to too many true crime shows, you know better than to implicate yourself in a murder. Grabbing a stick off the ground you gently brush the foliage away from the supposed corpse. No way, you can't believe your luck, it's an actual fucking skull. An intact skull of a deer! That is so cool, you've only seen taxidermists on TikTok getting so lucky and finding these dudes. Since the jaw bone is connected by tissue it of course isn't with the skull but maybe it's close by? Clearly this got planted or hidden by someone, maybe they were planning on pranking a friend by 'uncovering' a skull later. Oh well, finders keepers and all that, you have way better plans for this guy, hopefully you can find that jaw bone.
You set off searching through the foliage and near by bushes with the branch while holding the skull in your other arm. After searching about three feet around and finding no more bones you decide that this is the only part of the deer's skeleton in this area. A little disappointed but still thrilled with your find, you decide it must be a good time to go back to your car.
Surely you won't look weird now. You a little forager with their treasure in hand. Looks like you'll be busy cleaning, then bleaching, and cleaning these bones today. Is that the order to treat found bones? You aren't sure but you can look into that later. Placing the skull in the trunk so it doesn't roll about and get damaged you make sure it's secure before closing the trunk and getting into your car and locking the doors.
Not once did you notice the pairs of eyes that had been watching you. One watching as you found the deer skull, and the other set seeing you place bones into your car. They kept watching as you fiddled with the radio while the car was starting up. They watched as you pulled out of the sandy dirt lot and drove back down the old road a little faster than before now that you could clearly see.
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catchmewiddershins · 4 years ago
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Hi🥺
if it's too much trouble, could I request a pt. 3 of the ‘overhearing their crush talking about them’ with oikawa, akaashi and yamaguchi?
Thanks in advance and have a nice day!💕
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Haikyuu Characters Overhearing their crush talking about them - pt 3:
Includes: Oikawa, Akaashi and Yamaguchi! 💖 SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG 🥺 I’m so glad you asked bcs I needed a reason to write a third part hehe
Oikawa:
He could barely keep his eyes open. Contrary to popular belief, Oikawa wasn’t a monster, he couldn’t keep pushing and pushing and never feel the consequences. Interhigh was approaching again and he was desperate to win, desperate to see the national court just one time before he left high school, desperate to prove that all of the blood, sweat and tears that he had poured into this sport wasn’t futile. So he’d stayed awake, he trained until late at night and woke before the crack of dawn to practice. And now he was feeling the toll, incapable of focusing on the words of the teacher at the front of the class, he let his mind drift, getting shocked out of his skin when the bell rang for lunch.
Floating down the corridors, he almost fell asleep standing up until he walked into a door frame. Then, as he rounded the corner he heard your voice. Oikawa had been harbouring feelings for you for a while now, ever since you’d been kind to him outside of the usual fangirl devotion - you’d helped him hide from a few of them while he was late for practice, and he’d been trying to work up the courage to confess to you. He was just... worried that you’d assume he was asking in a playboy manner, rather than from sincere feelings. Suddenly, he paused, having heard his name in passing from your conversation.
“Why do you want to go to a volleyball match? Like at interhigh?”
“Because Oikawa’s playing and I wanted to cheer him on!” There you were, you sounded so cheerful, it made his heart flutter and heat sprang to his face.
“Isn’t he that guy who’s really pretty? I hear that tons of people are swooning over him, you’ll have a lot of competition if you wanna blend in.”
“I mean yeah... he’s pretty but that’s not why I like him!”
“What, you’re different from the rest? Why do you like him then, if not his looks? They seem to be the only thing of his that are of note.”
His heart sank a little, there it was again, that focus. His hair, his eyes, his face, people complimented him on them left and right and it made him wonder if that was all he was worth - is that all he is? Just a pretty-boy athlete?
You sounded... indignant?
“I like him because of his skills, for one! Have you seen his serve? That thing looks as if it could turn my face into a pancake! And besides that, he’s such a great leader! His team clearly flourishes with him as captain, I saw one match where he couldn’t make it and they were only working at 3/4 max of the potential that Oikawa is able to draw out of them - it’s incredible! I worked on a project with him once and he was both in charge and so considerate! He’s more than his face, you know.” Your hands moved passionately and he could imagine the sparkles in your eyes as you talked, the way you occasionally did about your favourite media or facts.
He was in deep, and your rant at your friend gave him the nudge he needed to confess immediately... or maybe at interhigh.
Akaashi:
He nodded as you spoke, having been asked to help tutor you for the upcoming exam, as you had a few things that you were stuck on. He’d accepted immediately, since he was absolutely smitten with you. Nobody had been told about this, not even Bokuto, because he would tease Akaashi to kingdom come if he found out - or he’d try to set you up, which would be even worse. Gently correcting a mistake you’d made in your work, he took the time to appreciate being so close to you. Akaashi loved to spend time with you, since you’d become tentative friends due to sitting adjacent to each other in Biology, and since you occasionally came to his matches, but only when you had the time.
There was a slight noise as his phone buzzed in his pocket, and, taking it out, he saw a text from Bokuto, saying that he’d forgotten where the bibs for practice were stored and that he was outside the classroom so that Akaashi could point him in the right direction. Stepping outside with a sigh, he showed Bokuto which way the storage cupboard was, and gave him very clear directions on how to get back to the gym from there, along with another, not really that sincere, apology for having to miss practice to tutor you. However, just before he opened the door again to the spare classroom that you were working in, his ears picked up the sound of your voice, on the phone to one of your friends.
“Yes I am getting tutored by Akaashi!” His curiosity was piqued, was your friend interested in him or something? He couldn’t hear the sound from your phone speaker, but your response sent sparks through him.
“No, of course I haven’t confessed to him - It’s not like he likes me back! Besides, we are actually supposed to be working!”
“...”
“Yes, I’m sure I like him! He’s so considerate, and he explains things really well, and he always knows how to help, and he’s gorgeous.”
Oh. Oh Oh Oh! You liked him! He couldn’t stop the beaming smile that shone across his face as your conversation with your friend trailed off, leaning against the wall outside and trying to quell the ache in his cheeks that came with such a wide, lovestruck grin. His ears were pink and his eyes sparkled, and if anyone had walked past him at that moment, they’d say that he’d never looked more alive.
He walked into the classroom, glowing, and sat back down next to you before clearing his throat. He could see redness in your face as well, and mustered all his courage to do what he’d been wanting to for a while.
“Hey... I’ve really enjoyed spending time with you today and... I was wondering if... you’d maybe like to go out with me sometime?” 
Your resounding yes made this the best day ever.
Yamaguchi:
It was a Saturday, sunny, warm, and boring. Yamaguchi had decided to try and pass the time by going for a quick stroll down to his favourite café, passing through a lovely green park on the way, where he walked around, looking at the different species of flower, and the fish in the ponds, throwing a few crumbs of bread to them as he passed. To be honest, the only way for the day to be more perfect would have been a backing soundtrack, then it would have felt like something directly out of a feel-good film. 
Coming to a new street, he wandered past a few shops, until he came to where he’d been meaning to come. The sweets sold here were the best, and getting one, plus a lemonade, to take away while he walked was just an extremely relaxing thing to do. He was planning to go and read a book in the park, to soak up some of the sunlight and enjoy the lovely afternoon.
The bell tinkled as he pushed open the door, and his nose was caressed by the smell of baking bread and sugar. However, as he approached the front to order, he spotted you and a couple of your friends sitting in the corner, near the window, all of you nursing some cold drinks and chatting with one another. His heart jumped into his throat, the sound of it pounding in his ears. The lady at the countertop, who had got to know Yamaguchi relatively well, since he came here so often, leaned over and grinned at him.
“Do you know them?” She asked, a twinkle in her eyes. At his nod, she giggled and said to him, “Whichever of them you like, you should say so! I bet they’d say yes!”
He thanked her, quietly, and smiled, knowing that she only meant well, and waited at the side of the counter for his order to be ready. As he waited, your voice drifted over to him from your seat at the window.
“So, do you like anyone?” One of your friends said with a laugh, you appeared to be having one of those lighthearted discussions that good friends sometimes have about such things.
A blush sprang to your face, and you brought a hand to your eyes, “...Maybe...” Leaning forwards, your friend gestured for you to continue. You sunk further into your chair in embarrassment.
“Ok... so you know... Yamaguchi?”
“Yamaguchi?” Your friend replied excitedly.
“Yeah,” smiling, your gaze drifted a little, as if you were lost in thought. “He’s just the sweetest, honestly, so supportive and kind, he helped me out after I tripped over the other day, and, when I missed one of the maths lessons, he talked me through the material... he’s lovely...”
Grinning, your friend patted your hand, relaxing back into their chair, “Well, he’s definitely not the worst person for you to be crushing on, you’ll need to drop some hints though... want a hand?”
“Stop it!” You whined, bringing your hands up again to cover your tomato-red face as your friend laughed.
Yamaguchi left the café with three things, a pastry, a lemonade, and the resolve to ask you out the next time he saw you. He practically skipped down the lane as he went back to the park, joy filling his heart.
Part 1
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