#this is why i need more people to make him do interviews what the fuckkk

[ratatatastic]

i cant believe "hey do you play basketball" tall jokes evolved into "so remember in utah when you were chatting with markkanen" to "oh yeah i knew him in the finnish army :)" what insane lore drop is this what the fuck

BMW Teammate of the Month | 1.31.25 (x)(x)

[inthewordsofahalfgoddes]

Idk where to start with this. I'm not supposed to try to make sense of things or apply too much logic because it's not anything I'm supposed to reason and give understanding to. As much as I do see myself as right brained intuitively driven I still rely heavily on logic and reasoning. This year has tested that so much. Believing in things that should not exist and seeing/experiencing things that I can't explain...I've been so lost in my head the past couple of weeks. I don't feel like myself and ik it's cause I'm adjusting to this switchup and change in perspective. I do sometimes think I'm going crazy. Sometimes I wonder about how delusion I can. But I've started trusting myself more. The things I've dived into all the peope and experiences I've gone through has changed it though. I have to be careful with how I say some of this because I'm not supposed to day too much but accept it and not try to intellectualize it. I guess all I can really say is I met someone who calls themselves a God, I found out how to heal people, I channelled and passed on vital information to someone who will move on to do some good work, I saw reality get altered and I can't even talk too much about it. Idk I used to always be just a side player in the spiritual world. Like not much ever really happened to me but people around me got to experience a lot if it. The door that I always stared at finally cracked open. I'm scared. Ik I shouldn't be but having reality switch like that and then havr to deal with it and the real world is nerveraking but tbh Ibe done it before. Yesterday I had a surge of memories fill my head of times I was talking to higher versions of others and exorcism/healimg people. I'm actually terrified lmao the channelling part wasn't that bad. I was observing myself speak to Angel but it was like a tapped into something. We talked for hours and hours about his life his problems his goals. I did his chart and as I was speaking to him I could feel something change in him. I was wondering why our oaths crossed and I got my answer. It felt so satisfying to channel thugh it felt right like this was what u was meant to do. I usually feel stunned most of the time but I think I'm shaking it off noe

. my head in this weird place I'm super contemplative and nit speaking as much as I used to. I can't even put that into words. Fuckkk this is hard. I just WISH I HAD CLARITY I HATE WAITING AND BEING PARUENT AND THATS LITETALLY HOW I HSVE TO BE RIGHY NOWWW It's frustrating but I can do is wait and keep at the meditating and being present. I still can't believe I'm finally on this journey about damn time tbh 😂🙄 but fuck idk what to expect anymore. The video I was watching literallynailed everything that happened. I wish I had more answers but google being stupid but ofv I can't google this stuff 😂😂 be thankful be present be hopeful fuck I sound like those hippies LOL fuck UGHHH I wish I knew where I was going with this but I'm too tired rm I'll continue this tomorrow after my interview. I hope I gr this job 😀😔 if I'm gonna move I'll need a lot saved up plus I gotta still buy more parts since my dad needs more money to help finish building parts if the house. Anyways fuck I'm tired