#this is the only reason I think I’m not aromantic also bc I don’t really care enough to attach any new labels to myself | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

mithliya · 2 years ago

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Can you explain how the split model is harmful?

i can try my best, i’m a little rusty bc i haven’t really touched this topic in quite some time.

speaking as a lesbian who once was closeted, and knows many lesbians who faced similar— the split attraction model simply does not work, is illogical, keeps us closeted + confused longer, and encourages denialism.

the split attraction model separates “sexual attraction” from “romantic attraction”. it argues that people can have sexual attraction in one way and romantic attraction in another. the most common examples are heteroromantic asexuals, aromantic asexuals, aromantic bisexuals, and the like. basically ace/aro on one axis and then a sexual orientation on another (and if it’s a “romantic attraction” then just remove the -sexual and replace it with -romantic, even though the -sexual just refers to the sex ur attracted to and doesn’t mean u necessarily want to have sex or have a libido). the logical conclusions of this is that sometimes someone may be homosexual but biromantic, meaning they’re “romantically attracted” to both sexes but only sexually desire the same sex. in normal speak, that’s either just being homosexual (& telling urself u could totally be able to tolerate a relationship that makes u unhappy bc at least ur with the opposite sex) or bisexual with strong preferences.

firstly, it’s homophobic— under the split attraction model, lesbians can be attracted to men if they’re “biromantic” or if they’re “homoromantic bisexuals” (ie bisexual with a strong preference). gay men can be into women for similar reasons. somehow, you could be gay AND straight at the same time (heterosexual homoromantic / homosexual heteroromantic).

secondly, it literally just confuses you further and keeps you from figuring yourself out. if you’re a lesbian and can’t figure out why men’s bodies repulse you and you feel nothing for men but you toooootally want a boyfriend (ie u want social acceptance and approval) then you can just tell urself ur heteroromantic homosexual or biromantic homosexual! and then u don’t have to accept that ur just a lesbian and can keep forcing urself to fake interest in men. this overwhelmingly will harm gay ppl, namely lesbians, especially since we are raised to revolve our futures around having a husband and kids & male approval the way all women are.

speaking anecdotally here, but i was literally just not into men but was able to tolerate being close to them (neutral on stuff like holding hands or hugging etc) and told myself that meant i’m “biromantic homosexual”, which was a step up from my previous belief that i was “heteroromantic homosexual”. before then i was just thinking i must be demisexual or asexual or aromantic or acespec etc because i simply did not consider the obvious possibility that maybe i’m just not interested in men. this is not a unique experience— many lesbians i know have spent years confused and closeted because they were telling themselves that not liking men must mean being asexual or aroace or whatever else. it keeps us in denial and ignoring our obvious feelings because simply finding a label that fits your current confused state & validating it as an Identity is much easier (& also somewhat fun esp when ur a teen struggling to know ur place in this world)

also a lot of it hinges on the assumption that the average gay person is like hypersexual as hell and it’s just generally not good to pretend like there’s these “separate forms of attraction” the way the SAM does.

i honestly don’t see an actual upside to it, it encourages heterosexuals to delude themselves into thinking they’re “””””queer””””””” because they have commitment issues or don’t want to be in a relationship or because they have a low libido, it convinces others that you can somehow be gay and not gay at the same time, it’s illogical, it encourages gay ppl to remain in denial and be closeted, it just. isn’t good

#anonymous

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silvermoon424 · 2 years ago

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Saw your post about aphobic tumblr era and was too scared to comment bc I was afraid I was going off topic + I'm not even ace so I seriously didn't know if my comment was welcome but I just wanted to say how disturbed I am to this day when on shows and movies that praise queer culture they shamelessly judge adult virgins. Regardless of the reason why they're virgins it makes it hard to ever normalize having ace/aro characters. I don't think I've even seen any canon ace/aro characters in shows I've seen which is bs bc ace/aro ppl are just as real as any other queer people (even tho shows nowadays seem to revel in diversity which looks in certain shows like they're more there to add views than realism tbh). Anyway just wanted to say good post! Ace/aro ppl are awesome 💕

First of all, thank you for the positivity!!

Secondly, yeah, I’ve always been uncomfortable with virgin-shaming. It’s not cool to slut-shame people, and it’s not cool to shame people for being virgins or for lacking sexual experience in general. Can we as a society collectively stop caring so much what consenting adults decide to do or not do in the bedroom?

Also, you bring up a great point about aro/ace representation. I’m at my office rn so can’t search for it, but I remember watching a great video by a LGBTQ+ YouTube channel about how aro/ace representation in media is seriously lacking compared to other queer identities. There are really only a handful of canonically aro/ace characters. And I’ll be blunt, fans often don’t help matters by shipping canonically aromantic characters with other characters or writing sex scenes in fanfics with canonically ace characters (not saying aces can’t have sex, but like… damn. You really had to do that, didn’t you).

#aromantic #asexual #asexuality

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altschmerzes · 1 year ago

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Hey you don’t have to answer this obvs if it’s something you don’t want to share/talk about but I’m curious how did you meet your wife/navigate getting married in an aromantic way? I kinda feel like I might be aro and I’m getting older and feeling like. I want a partner and I don’t want to be alone but I don’t know if I really feel romantic love, and I just feel kinda hopeless about finding that, but it’s nice knowing there are people who do find it.

absolutely, yeah!!! i love to talk about my relationship honestly, for a lot of reasons (it makes me feel very happy and warm inside, and i love to talk about this wonderful thing i have in my life with this wonderful person, i am a Wife Guy for real) but also for exactly this reason too - bc i don't think a lot of people know that what we have, what we're doing, is an option. or if they do think of it, they don't think it's realistic or something that can actually happen.

i spent a long time thinking that what i wanted, the thing that would actually make me happy, that i daydreamed about just... it was a nice thought but the odds that i would be able to actually have it were so low that it didn't warrant thinking about at all. i wanted a partner, someone i could live with and raise kids with and build a life together with, and i wanted it completely platonically. i didn't want romance and i didn't want sex either but i did want intimacy, emotionally and physically. i assumed this would only be possible with another aro(ace) person, because i didn't think anyone who wasn't aroace would want that, or that it would be like. unfair somehow, or asking someone to give enormous things up to be with me. (this was all a bunch of jumping to assumptions and internalized bullshit, btw. my fiancee is a lesbian and is just as happy as i am, wants our marriage and our life together, exactly the way that it is, just as much as i do - and has been extremely patient and kind in reassuring me of this.)

(haha this got long again, it usually seems to when i'm talking about My Aro Experience and relationships and em sldj. further under the cut-)

and then it was like, well, i already have no idea how i'd meet another aroace person irl, and even then i have no idea if we'd be compatible. if we'd have the same values and vision for our lives. if they'd want kids. if they'd be comfortable with the kind of physical affection i really wanted to engage in. etc. so i just kind of told myself that y'know, it would have been nice if i had the option of not being alone, but i didn't, so i had to just get used to it. (and it is perfectly fine if someone wants to be alone. that's great. that's a huge thing the aro community is fighting for all of the time. but i did not want that. i just thought it was the only choice i had, if i wasn't willing to force myself into a romantic and probably sexual relationship i didn't want.

my wife and i actually met quite a while back, when we were like. sixteen or so, online. we've been friends for a really long time. which is why when im asked how long we've been together by people who don't know our relationship is platonic, or that i'm aro, or whatever, i have a hard time answering it XD. because like, our engagement was the first we'd ever decided to Be In A RelationshipTM, but if you think about it as a progression of the same relationship we've always had, just as dating before an engagement would be, we've been together for like. coming up on close to ten years.

figuring out navigating our relationship has been a little difficult at times but mostly it's been absolutely wonderful. difficult mostly in the sense that there's no script for this, nothing set out that tells us this is what a relationship like ours is supposed to look like, or usually looks like. we've had to figure it out ourselves. but also that's one of the things that's really been wonderful about it. we can decide at every single point what it is we want, what it is that'll make us happy.

like - at first we decided to have separate bedrooms when we moved in together after we finished our respective degrees/got married/got immigration all sorted out. and then after sharing one when we went to my hometown to introduce em to my family we were like. well. we were fools, huh. so, turns out we're sharing a bedroom. (and i'm... really happy with that, particularly, because it turns out i sleep really well when em and i are together. i used to write a lot about characters sleeping in the same bed, cuddling, etc, and i still do, but i always sort of assumed it was completely obvious i had no idea what i was talking about bc it couldn't possibly be the way i described it. and now that i've been there, it's better.)

the rest of the world is a little trickier, haha. it's a little weird and bad sometimes that people are constantly assuming i'm in a romantic relationship, tbh. even in the aro community i see a lot of people talking like the only people around are nonpartnering/single or in romantic relationships. and the rest of the world, people who don't know i'm aro or who do but like.... forget that a lot? or assume it's changed or doesn't matter or something? is kind of exhausting and uncomfortable. for the most part, we don't bother explaining the nature of our relationship to people. this is also something we talked about! we discussed how much we wanted to clarify or contextualize, and decided that ultimately like... with the exception of people we're very close to, and in contexts like this (fairly anonymous post on ye olde internet with the ability to immediately block anyone who clowns on it), it's really nobody's business unless we decide it is and we're cool with just letting people assume whatever. that doesn't mean it doesn't suck sometimes, but it's a calculus i've made and we've made together.

anyways, just. there you have it!!! i trust my fiancee and i love them and they love me and our greatest priority is always making sure the other person feels safe and loved and respected. and i feel that in every conversation we have. it's a unique situation and we've had to figure a lot of things out along the way, and that's included a lot of conversations i just don't know how to have, but we've figured it out together. i felt hopeless for a really long time, too. i wish i could go back and tell myself in the past where i'd end up. and that's part of why i keep talking about it so much and so openly, so that people know they don't have to just... there are options, y'know? options for going after what you want and talking about what you want with anyone in your life who you have a significant relationship with. i could've cheated myself out of the best thing that's ever happened to me by assuming it just wasn't possible. i'm so glad that i didn't.

#gav gab #gav answers #wah....... man. i love talking abt my engagement/marriage every chance i get #bc it makes me very happy and i love my wife so much #but also bc like. idk. if i'd known this was a real thing that really happened when i was younger #i probably would've spent a lot less time feeling very scared and hopeless and alone #aromantic #aro blogging #long post

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eucharistsamruby · 2 years ago

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Ooo you think Dean is aromantic gay? 👀 If you want, can you share what made you come to this conclusion/headcannon? Because I love aromantic Dean myself!! ♥️💞

i’m wishy-washy on the gay part but i believe WHOLEHEARTEDLY in aro dean. also i have been relatively inactive in this fandom for like a year so my apologies if i am forgetting things

as far as i can remember he only ever expresses romantic interest in cassie and lisa, and i think it’s significant that he originally met both of them when sam was at stanford and the only reason he had any sort of long-term relationship with lisa was because sam was dead and had told him to go find her. i think he is motivated by family and companionship and belonging, and he ran to romantic relationships to find that when the family he already had collapsed. and as someone who’s really absorbed and internalized a lot of the patriarchal, heteronormative, amatonormative, capitalist, etc. messaging of our society of course if his birth family is gone he’s going to try to find family the only other socially approved way. his gf in what is and what should never be is a random model his psyche inserts bc it’s what he’s supposed to want and he basically ignores her the entire time in favor of family. maybe i’m just projecting bc i know sometimes i feel this pressure to find a romantic partner not because i want one but because i want companionship and commitment and my friends are all coupled up so where the hell else am i gonna find it but i do really see that in dean. i’ve seen the siren from sex and violence used to support wincest and bizarrely destiel but to me it just solidifies aro dean. platonic love is what’s important to him and what he feels strongly enough for it to be destructive and all-consuming.

for the gay part honestly i could go gay bi or even ace but i do lean gay or gray-ace and gay. his intimacy generally lies with men, and there’s a lot of repressed gay shit about him. dr sexy, benny, that guy whose name i can’t remember played by christian kane, ketch for a bit there, etc. he def had a high libido when young plus internalized homophobia which is why he was sleeping with a bunch of women but he mostly stops being interested as he gets older and once they settle in the bunker. he finds other sources of pleasure and comfort than casual sex, some healthier and some far less healthy. idk exactly where i’m going with this but i just don’t think he’s actually for real into women

#sorry this is so rambly and nonsensical

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alloarocharactershowdown · 2 years ago

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Redemption Round 1 Eliminations

Vi have already selected four of the eight characters who will be returning for Round 3, leaving four more characters to be selected. Based off the submissions vi received, vi have narrowed down the options to 14 characters. Y'all will have the opportunity to vote on a Google Form to pick four of these characters to return for Round 3.

Below the cut are the names of all the characters included, plus what reasons people gave for nominations (both in Redemption Round and initial nominations) as well as any propaganda made for them.

At the very end of the post is a link to the Google Forms.

Katsuya Serizawa

"The others are more just so I don’t look like I only have two options and are people I would love back in as well."

"My blorbos"

"but i also chose a few others i can see as aroallo since we can pick more than 1. sorry it's obvious i only know the anime characters..."

"They great and they fuck"

Submitted propaganda - [link]

Dean Winchester

"I mean just look at them have you seen them? They deserve it."

"He's the character I think of when I think of aroallo characters. Ik it's not canon but he's accidently great rep"

Teruhashi Kokomi

"Technically the only one I feel strongly about is Noszaki and Teruhashi because I’m a huge fan of their respective shows and they fit it to a T."

"They great and they fuck"

"She is absolutely consumed by heteronormativity but deep down is a aromantic lesbian. She only likes saiki because he doesn’t like her and is doing exactly what I did and fooled myself into thinking I liked people because I felt like I should"

Jake English

"I feel bad bc he was an early aro headcanon of mine and meant a fair bit to me as a teen but also he went up against my specialest boy of all time miles straume so I couldn't vote for him. I think he deserves a second chance he is very aro coded from what I remember just not as much as miles was. and miles is like next level."

"Let’s start with Jake English. In Homestuck, a core point of his character is the desire to be recognized as more than an object of romantic desire. See, several characters over the course of the comic are attracted to him, romantically or otherwise; in fact, all 3 of his best friends were attracted to him at one point in time. He even gets together with one of his best friends - Dirk. The thing is, though, many people around him within the story don’t really see him as anything *outside* of the people who desire him, which is a point that causes him no small amount of grief. Uhh I’m not really sure where I was going with this. But yes, an important part of his arc is wanting to be recognized as somebody outside of how people romantically desire him."

"JUSTICE FOR JAKE ENGLISH THE OG ALLOARO!!!!"

"as an alloaro dude myself, i rel8 to him so very much. him fumbling his way into a rel8ionship with a close friend because "hey might as well i mean i guess i can be into him if i try" + convincing himself he was feeling romantic attraction heavily resembles how i went about things. also hes coded grey and green."

"He is canonically aromantic and heavily implied to be bisexual! He is physically attracted to women and at one point dated a man, but ended it because he realized he doesn't feel romantically for anyone -- never has and never will!"

Grog Strongjaw

"He fucks and he does not love. He fucks so much. He does not love (romantically. He loves his friends a whole lot.)"

"1) It would be REALLY entertaining for me personally, and 2) They're the characters that I know that fit the alloaro vibe well"

"I'm projecting onto characters from my fixations please"

"Canonically very interested in sex, but no romantic love interests. The player, Travis Willingham, specifically did not want to do any romance in this campaign. Grog still has very strong interpersonal connections, especially his friendship with the gnomes Scanlan and Pike."

"He canonically is very into sex but has never felt any sort of romantic attraction towards anyone in his entire life. That's pretty alloaro to me."

"He's also a himbo. I think he deserves extra points for that /j"

"He is never portrayed as wanting or needing a relationship and is shown as perfectly happy with the companionship of his friends but also recognizes that booty is nice"

"I love him so much"

Buffy Summers

"Come on did you SEE how close the Buffy vs Jeff matchup was she literally lost by 1% Just give her a chance and she could go soooooo far she's the character of all time and deserves to sweep every tournament she's in. Also I recently rewatched the episode I was made to love you and it really solidified my aro bi buffy trutherism she was giving off VIBES in that episode. It's not even just the obvious part where in this episode she has her revelation about how she can maybe be happy outside of a relationship having time with herself it's also her protagonist of a movie about a divorcee finding herself energy it's her being so fucking done with all the dudes in this episode obsessing over their unrequited crushes and it is, most importantly, her spending the whole episode identifying with a robot"

"For Buffy, Miles, and Mello I just think them being aro is fun and I wanna see them have another chance. But more importantly I want all of them to rejoin because Im Aro and So Are They Can’t You Feel It"

"Her aro bi swag <3 It's more Vibes than anything and in fact is often actively contradicted by the show but also there's Something there! SPOILERS FOR THE ENDING OF BTVS but I am thinking in particular about the show's finale in which Buffy decides that she doesn't want a relationship with any of the love interest characters and like the show presents it as her wanting to take time to figure out who she is which is cool and sexy and valid of her but also. could be the aromanticisms. It's especially pertinent that there's a running theme throughout the show of her believing there's something wrong with her because her relationships never work out and in the end her having this realisation that there's nothing wrong with her it's ok to have failed romances she's still working out who she is (AND WHAT'S SHE WORKING OUT? THAT SHE'S AROMANTIC??? HUH????) And tbh I'm not even tinhatting or making this a bigger thing than it's meant to be like they put buffy's speech about getting out of the vicious cycle she's been stuck in getting trapped in relationships that don't make her happy in the finale episode which is all about her changing the system that the show's entire premise has been based around and like. creating her own story. it means a lot to me!!! Also someone else pointed out that she had two different love interests who were convinced she didn't actually love them while they were together which I mean. sure that could just be those specific guys and their issues but WEIRD THAT IT HAPPENED TWICE HUH"

Alix Kubdel

Canonically alloaro

"All these characters are definitely aro and utilize their aro-ness in such a great way that it makes me feel glad to be aro (like Sonic being aro but still being incredibly devoted to his friends, Alix willing to hide in time for them, Agent 3 being a great leader of the Squidbeak Splatoon because they’re amicable but also, can do it alone because they trust their friends are there)"

"My blorbos"

"Word of god specifically aromantic and not asexual. Also an absolute badass and voice of reason."

Submitted propaganda - [link]

Jess (Loveless)

Canonically alloaro

"she’s canon aroallo and the jess nation is strong!"

"she’s canonically aroallo (and bi too - double win)!"

Submitted propaganda - [link]

Kaname Date

"I picked these characters because I love them and I am aroallo. However I’d like to put a special word in for Kaname Date, who, if I remember correctly, never shows any romantic interest in anyone but is so relentlessly horny that his reaction speed is three times better when looking at or thinking about porn. This is due to a near death experience with a snake as a child. He’s the guy ever and I love him."

"Alloaro swag so immense it puts me to shame"

"babygirl <3"

Umetarou Nozaki

"Technically the only one I feel strongly about is Noszaki and Teruhashi because I’m a huge fan of their respective shows and they fit it to a T."

"So aro, very good boys"

"They great and they fuck"

"He doesn’t understand romance in the slightest and I will die on the hill that he is aro"

"I’ve never even seen the show…. O.O"

Makoto Sunakawa

"my main pick is kou yamori and you already know why but i also chose a few others i can see as aroallo since we can pick more than 1. sorry it's obvious i only know the anime characters..."

"So aro, very good boys"

"He's the conventially attractive friend of the less conventionally attractive (and wholesome!!) protagonist in the story, but never accepts any girl's crush 'cause most of them have talked badly about the protag behind his back. The only time a girl confessed to him that didn't make fun of him, he turned her down anyway because he didn't like her in that way, but they were on good terms anyway."

"He's an excellent wingman to the protag and his girlfriend, but none of his advice is particularly romantic. It's all about caring for one another as people, and given how his friendship with the protag isn't deep, I see him as a loveless aro. He's not canonically aro or ace, but he has been my comfort aro-coded character so it would be nice to see him there even if he doesn't win~"

Kou Yamori

"my main pick is kou yamori and you already know why but i also chose a few others i can see as aroallo since we can pick more than 1. sorry it's obvious i only know the anime characters..."

"He’s basically canonically aroallo. By that i mean they didn’t use any label but he canonically has no romantic attraction and canonically has sexual attraction."

"His aroallo identity is also a big deal in the story since the premise is that he wants to become a vampire, but to become a vampire you have to be bitten by a vampire you are in love with. So that’s the conflict. He isn’t villanized for this identity nor is the moral/goal ever to “fix” him. Also they tackle amatonormativity and the value of platonic relationships :) incredibly refreshing and meaningful to me"

Submitted propaganda - [link]

Clover Martinez

Canonically alloaro

"clover is i think the first aroallo character i've ever read about in a book, and it's super cool to have an aro protagonist. i really love how her aromanticism was handled- the book is about other things but her aromanticism is still important and talked about"

"canonically aroallo (aromantic bisexual)"

"she's cool"

Anya Jenkins

"Anya - Listen if ONE character I've nominated today gets through to the redemption round let it be her please please please I'm begging. She has SUCH aroallo energy and beyond my own personal hc I do think that a lot of her character just adds up so much more if you take that view of her. Like she canonically uses romantic relationships as a way to give herself a sense of identity and to make herself feel like a normal person (she used to be a demon before being turned human so she has a Complex about that) and she makes multiple jokes about how sex is the only thing she actually likes about being in a relationship. let her in the redemption round the writers fucked her character arc so bad and she deserves a win"

"the aroallo character of all tiiiiiiime oh my god. she was a human who got turned into a demon and then back into a human again after a thousand years. she didn't understand the difference between sex and romance. 99% of her problems could have been solved if anyone had sat her down and explained the concept of friends with benefits. she spent most of the dates we saw her go on infodumping about her past murders. she became the love interest to one of the show's leads largely because she thought he was the most tolerable guy at their high school and felt like she needed to go to prom with Someone. she agreed to marry him because she thought it would give her the sense of identity she lacked and was desperate for. she sang a musical number about how she only wanted to get married for the sex money and sense of identity. she got left at the altar. she immediately went and fucked an amoral vampire after getting left at the altar. she was vaguely trans coded. she was even autistic <3"

Redemption Round 1 Eliminations - [link]

#redemption round #redemption round 1 #nominations #alloarocharactershowdown2023 #alloarocharactershowdown

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lovelessnotheartless · 2 years ago

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hello! i have only gotten one or two crushes in my life and I’m 17.. is that normal for allo people to experience? as for each crush too I’ve struggled engaging in any romantic acts or getting in a relationship in the first place bc of fear/shame/guilt/sometimes ick or disinterest feelings. ive also made up crushes before bc of my lack of them. I can’t imagine myself in romantic situations with anyone else besides my current partner even fictional characters and especially not after having a long emotional connection but even then likely not. i often don’t really feel much romantic attraction I think and sometimes it fades out into nothingness but sometimes I have bursts of it and do like imagining/doing romantic things with my partner. Could that just be allo or can I call that aro/aro spec? however I also am autistic and disordered in other ways that could hinder feelings of love/care towards others… so does it mean thsi can still be aro?

Hello!

These are all good questions, and I have answers!

First, having only 2 crushes by 17 can be an allo experience, but it can also be an arospec experience. Overall, it's a fairly neutral experience. I know both allo and arospec people who share that experience.

Next, you mentioned struggles engaging in relationships out of fear, guilt, and shame, which aren't typical reasons not to want relationships, but tend to come with trauma surrounding relationships or those feelings. For example, growing up, I was constantly told that relationships before the age of 18 were horrific and incredibly not allowed, and that relationships with people outside of specific requirements would have dire consequences. I then felt guilt and shame and fear around relationships and romance, but most people (allo or aro) don't experience those specific feelings unless they have some sort of trauma regarding romance or relationships. However, you also mentioned icky feelings and disinterest, which are much more aro experiences than allo ones.

The rest of what you went on to describe does sound pretty arospec to me, and I suggest looking into some arospec sublabels if you'd like a name for the feeling, such as arospike or aroflux.

Autism does not prevent you from being aromantic, and a lot of autistic people who have difficulties with relationships and understanding emotions relate to the arospec community and may identify as aromantic because of that difficulty, which is totally valid. If you feel it suits you, then go for it.

Hope this helped you out!

-Mod Mikey

#aro #ace #aromantic #loveless letters #asexual #aroace #lgbt #lgbtq #acespec #arospec

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hirokiyuu · 2 years ago

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sols roundup masterpost

i mentioned i was reworking the original post on my ao3 and so here it is! please note that a) there are a LOT of spoilers under the cut (guy who has 80+ hours and multiple multiple endings) and b) there’s a lot of ways to take sol and these are just me having fun with them, if u dont like thats fine but dont tell me i don’t care. lol. also worth noting i think time loops are most fun when they subtly influence each other so there’s a lot of that in here LOL

worth noting i think theres a few traits that are pretty universal to them? wants to do right and full of love are the big two, tho curiosity, (seeming) warmth, and ability to fit in w/those around them are also pretty important tho i think more flexible. its just fun the way various sols can have those traits like.... manifest? an alien-hater sol who goes hunting all the time is just as valid as a sol dating dys that wants to end the war. just different ppl they love and different experiences. its fun

with that. onto the Meat

1) solana (she/her (demi?)girl, loyalty leaning lawyer, neutral end)

baby’s first run! outwardly warm but pretty cold inside. hypercompetent everywhere except in her love life. fell for tang when they were like nine on the ship and just sort of, never stopped, feeling that way, including when she was 100 years old and had outlived tang by nearly forty years, partially bc fixating on tang as people were dying was kind of. the only solace she had. wouldve really benefited from a good therapist.

2) solanaceae (he/him tguy, governor, peace ending)

childhood optimist with a hero complex turned "realist” but actually-exactly-the-same-just-depressed-about-it adult. saves tammy and tonin and hal! cannot save his parents :) grows a little distant from most of the people around him as a result, except dys, who Gets it. avoids tang for pretty much no reason he can understand, just has a sense of She Will Hurt You If You Get Too Close when he sees her sometimes. becomes governor solely bc he wants to save people. the kind of person you can trust in your house with your keys and your valuables and then someone asks ‘hey whats his favorite color’ and youre like. i dont. actually know

3) solane (they/them nb, gardener ending)

manic overconfident freak. definitely a ‘i wont tell people about my dreams bc it’s like i’m a HERO this way!’ type. saves everyone and extremely proud about it. coasting through life from ages 14-19 until they go find dys after the bomb has gone off and he’s dating. someone else? which makes them freak out bc THEYRE the hero. so instead of being normal about this they become a gardener in a desperate attempt not to be left behind

It’s Bad!

4) solanaceae (he/him cisguy, colonial hero, neutral ending) x / x

this is the one ive been referring to in private as “fascist manwhore sol” and honestly. yeah. just as overconfident as the last but extremely charming about it. the kind of guy you kinda wanna hit but also can’t help but like? somehow manages to be close w/most everyone in the colony despite their various opinions. really really hates the gardeners + even sym, for some reason w/in himself that he can’t explain.

in Love with dys for most of their lives but cant ever make it work, fwb with rex, dates vace despite having matching tattoos with his ex-gf. hes just that kind of guy. dies young and a hero, less than a year after dys disappears into the ridges. dont think abt it too hard.

5) solane (she/her nb, neutral end, roboticist on accident somehow but a social skills job wouldve fit much better)

if third sol Thinks theyre god this sol like. actually Is. extremely clear dreams, used to talk abt them pretty much always until her first trip to medbay, at which point she stopped ever letting adults know. kind of existentially exhausted as a result. using this life literally just as a coffeeshop au lol. poly but also probably aromantic; open rship w/rex, who they love a lot but no more so than literally any of their other friends. pretty happy with stuff!

until they go to see dys off when he “vanishes” from the colony and they accidentally let it drop they couldve like. ended the whole war. he’s. displeased. they still make an effort to enjoy the rest of their life but when they die theyre thinking abt how they should try to be a better person next time. and also hoping they remember less.

6) solanaceae (genderfluid but generally refers to self as a lesbian, peace end, botanist) x

cheerful heroine! desperately wants to be normal and tries so so hard to ignore her dreams, which works kind of, right up until they very purposefully ignores the one abt tammy and tammy dies immediately after :) at which point they completely switches gears and uses their dreams to try and save Everyone they can. bffs with nem since childhood & into her pretty much Always. everyone’s friend! dies content and at peace.

interestingly, bc this is the route where i got paradox ending on a save, probably the sol closest to the wormhole + everything about it, despite not actually remembering much from his dreams. it manifests in other ways. lol.

7) solane (she/her cisgirl, neutral end, roboticist)

coward who can only be brave when it’s for the sake of the people she loves, most notably tammy who she actually dislikes until she saves her life, at which point she realizes maybe she Can be a hero too. better with robots than people, spent most of her childhood following cal around bc he was one of hte only ppl to make time for her. falls madly in love w/tammy; their family is her biggest joy. a good parent.

8) solanaceae (he/him agender, neutral end, doctor)

feral intense child who becomes a terrifying eagle-eyed doctor. max perception by age eleven, somehow. STRONG sense of justice. strongest belief is “if you ignore someone you couldve saved, you’re garbage.” not quite high enough friendship w/nem to convince her to leave vace as teens; helps her later on when theyre adults. years and years later after dys “dies” they end up moving in and spend the rest of their lives together.

9) solanaceae (they/them nb, peace end, entertainer)

awkward ace kid who always speaks their mind. accidentally destroys tammy’s confidence every time they talk. gets confessed to by both marz and rex, shoots them down extremely awkwardly due to both aforementioned asexuality and the fact theyve had a crush on dys since they were thirteen. takes their promise to let him go seriously to the point that when he tries to bomb hte colony, they let him, and when he wants to be a gardener, they don’t stand in his way. is alright with this at first but slowly begins to feel lonelier and lonelier about it as time passes, and when they die and realize they won’t actually be with him again they feel. Very Bad. pass on wishing they’d not let him go but resenting him for asking to.

10) solane (she/her cisgirl, neutral end, xeno wrangler)

ive been calling this one “cuckoo bird sol” for a reason. desperately wants someone to be devoted to Her and Her Alone who Won’t Leave, and feels like. cal is good for that. doesn’t like tammy as a result, which means that when she has a nightmare abt tammy dying she doesn't even care, it’s not like its REAL. yeah. It’s Bad! she feels guilty abt it and then feels bad bc she’s also happy bc cal spends more time with her but also she does sure feel like shes competing against a dead girl huh! so! that’s fun!

eventually she does work her shit out and realize she does like cal himself and does want kids on her own terms but like. the process of getting there! one fucked up kid. dies more content than she realized she could be, glad for her family.

11) solanaceae (she/her nb leaning, peace end, parent) x

rowdy. her heart is 80% love and 20% pure unadulterated rage. unaugmented, which she personally doesnt care abt, but she sure does get pissed off at ppl trying to be soooo nice to her abt it! too busy w/sfc stuff during wet and as such completely misses her chance to talk dys out of the bomb. when she finds him on the ridges afterwards they yell at each other abt being in love w/each other for forever and she manages to drag him back home.

in some ways this would be my “golden run” (full friendship with everyone) (jesus christ) but despite that her actual bffs besides dys are tammy and (unfortunately) vace. in another world i would retcon this to ot3 but in this one she kissed sym and then he died in front of her and despite herself she kind of cant stop flinching away from him now if he tries to make a move. they do hinge poly instead it works. has a boatload of kids and never augments any of them. dies exhausted and delighted and in love w/the world.

12) solane (he/him cisguy, peace ending, parent oops)

delusion run! sol who cant stop talking abt his delusions even when he knows he should. pursues dys in the “we were In Love before so we will be again!” way not the “i like you!” way until he gets. y’know. lobotomized. in some ways not focusing on his dreams is good for him but also he loses a lot of his personality? focus? afterwards

teases tammy relentlessly but ends up falling for her but bc for some reason this run glitched and tammy’s pregnancy just. kept going. she never had the kid? so i didnt date her even tho he wouldve lol. tbh most of th ending for this one is what id consider noncanon for him but ill retcon it later when i have more Vibes in place

13) solanaceae (they/he, peace ending, astronaut) this is a dead dove run (mentions of abuse)

unlucky number thirteen :) sol coming out of a delusion run with the creeping sense that they should not trust Anyone with their secrets. a little disconnected from the ppl around them tho they get on well enough w/dys and tang. madly in love with the wormhole. desperate to get off the planet and back into space so they can see it, a sentiment no one shares until, y’know. vace.

in Love (lol) with him after his 50. first time theyve ever met anyone they think Gets them so they enable him. fucking crushed when he starts dating nem. when he offers to cheat they take him up on it, which means he learns nothing and they lose one of their childhood friends :) eventually they go into space together just like they wanted! it’s bad! die in the wormhole and i think thats the first time they ever truly, from the bottom of their heart, regret everything. never want to fall in love again.

14) sol (no pronouns whenever possible but sort of ok w/they, peace ending, farmer) warning for abuse mentions in this one as well

sometimes you get so badly abused in one life your next life it still affects you! kind of an odd child, gets along better w/congruence than the other kids but thinks of cal is like a brother. doing ok until helios lands and then it’s like. h

avoids vace like the plague, despises/is afraid of him but doesn’t realize why until after sol starts understanding dreams more. when he dies i think sol wants to be like Good Riddance but. cant fully. approaches rex bc sol want to know What’s Up With The Whole Rex+Vace Deal, end up falling pretty hard. dating sym also, the three of them living together is an Experience i think. dies full of Love.

15) solana (he/him tguy, peace end, athlete)

rambunctious! cheerful! kind of dumb! falls in love w/cal from a young age and is convinced they’re gonna grow up and get married and is subsequently crushed when cal starts dating tammy instead esp bc. cal sort of. lead them on a bit w/it. slowly falls in love w/dys in the aftermath.

a bit immature. plays sportsball even in the middle of war, tension with both cal And nem as a result despite still being their bffs. he and nem are on opposite sportsball teams for the rest of their lives and yet go out for drinks after constantly. she’s his sister, basically! dies pretty happy w/how things turned out

16) solanaceae (she/they, neutral end, merchant)

greedy greedy greedy. wants money and love and attention, time and people and things, everyhting you can think of she wants it. she marz and tang are the Terrible WLW Trio of Girls Who Might Be Dating. bit of a soft spot for dys she can’t quite rationalize, will be kind to him when she’s not to anyone else. fond of rex as well.

she and marz flirt by flirting with tang, aka the person she Actually likes. pretty happy when they finally hook up, but isn’t devastated by the breakup as much as she is.... left hollow. another mistake on top of everyhting else (capitalism, dys vanishing, girl shes liked forever dumping her, also theres maybe a fleet from earth coming but haha dw abt it) she tells rex abt the fleet maybe a year? before it shows up. dies wishing desperately she had been able to be kinder.

17) solana (he/him tguy, peace end, professor) x

sugary sweet! childhood friends with tammy, they’re v similar people. loves her a lot, cannot wait to be best man at her wedding to cal LOL. despite his gentle demeanor he is also absolutely the kind of guy to do Whatever It Takes for the ppl he loves (ie poisons uncle tonin to keep him alive LOL)

thinks nomi is like, the coolest person in the universe when they meet bc they can MAKE things. so so stupid about them. when they start dating its embarrassing for everyone but they are so happy together no one can actually say anything. dies happy but wishing he was more confident in himself/brave

aaaaaaaaanyways that’s the current list. for Now. there may be more coming. i have offshoots of some of these as well that may or may not pop up wwww generally for fic that isn’t set with a specific sol i tend towards an nb sol closest to personality+dreams to my sixth sol? cheerful and trying to help but also Just A Kid about it!

#i kind of want to make a sol who would do green vertumna forever tbh #7th sol has that as an offshoot but in the end she loves cal too much to let it happen #i do like paradox run being an offshoot of one and not quite its own thing tho. fits well #also i need to properly romance sym at some point For Rho but i see dys and im like #what if he kissed sol. what if. wh #what do you want me to do we renamed the gc 4dys bc we all love him so much #personal #i was a teenage exocolonist spoilers #this will be edited later

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voidbot · 3 years ago

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some characters i headcanon as aro and/or ace

kusuo saiki (the disastrous life of saiki k)

this will come as no surprise considering my pfp, but whatever. he’s never really shown any signs of romantic attraction in the show, and has stated a few times that he doesn’t understand romance. not only that but i relate to him A Lot for other reasons so why not just project this onto him as well lmao. also teruhashi is aroace too. or a lesbian. or both.

abed nadir (community)

abed is greyromantic and in a qpr with troy do not even try to change my mind. i would say he’s 100% aromantic but he did have a girlfriend or two so it seems less likely. but he’s definitely on the aro spectrum and i like to think he’s ace, too. also just another example of me projecting :’)

katniss everdeen (the hunger games)

do not come at me with ‘but she kissed people and liked it!’ ‘she married peeta and had a kid with him!’ i do not care. she loved peeta but it was not romantic, it was that special type of love that i like to think only arospec people can feel :) they were in a qpr and got platonically (kinda) married and had a child because they’re a family! yeah i’m projecting. also arospec people can enjoy kissing it’s not a hard concept to comprehend. katniss everdeen is arospec (and probably ace too but i kinda like to headcanon her as aro allo) and started a family with her soulmate who she loves deeply. idk about you but that makes perfect sense to me.

elsa (frozen)

ngl this is partially out of spite bc disney tried to pull the whole ‘she’s not a lesbian, she’s just a strong, independent woman!’ well jokes on you bitch she’s queer now. and obviously there’s nothing wrong with being a strong independent woman, but to use that simply because they wanted to make sure nobody could say she was gay is…. icky. she’s definitely arospec though. destroying amatonormativity one dramatic ballad at a time.

otis (sex education)

this character is aroace in some way shape or form i don’t care what anyone says, i don’t care what the writers say, he had the perfect opportunity to be incredible aspec representation and so that’s what i’m making him. there’s still at least one more season of the show so i’m just holding on with every fibre of my being to that sweet sweet main character aspec rep that we all deserve.

oh and at least a few characters from the good place are aro and/or ace in some way.

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annarendellsa · 3 years ago

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my heathers headcanons

it's the way i see them and draw them, you don't have to agree! this is based on both the musical and the movie

CW: mention of suic*de and e*ting disorders (bulimia) as well as various mental illnesses

Heather Duke

• heather duke is aromantic and yes its because she wears green, have you seen her socks in the off broadway musical? /hj

• more seriously, she IS aromantic but it took some time for her to figure out. she is allo but she doesn't label her sexuality, and she was always confused and frustrated to experience sexual attraction but never romantic attraction; she had a hard time accepting this part of herself.

• post heathers: maybe she discovers about non binary identities and asks her girlfriends to test out they/them pronouns on her? idk? aro-agender duke?

• she also struggles with empathy as she is naturally apathic

• and she's putting this image of a cold mean girl because she believes she can only be that given she's aro and ND

• post musical: she had no idea mcnamara actually tried to commit suic*de and when veronica tells her she breaks down in tears and spend a few days writing an apology letter to mcnamara

• post musical: mcnamara helps her to develop her compassion, knowing it's not her fault she's incapable of empathy. she didn't have to forgive her, but they did, and it really motivates duke to become a better person and be as nice as her

• post musical: she sees a doctor! she eventually recovers from her bulimia. veronica and mac are 100% supportive of her recovery, and very proud

• she gets bigger as part of her recovery and learns to embrace it

• duke is very pale with really dark and thick hair and eyebrows, soft features and quite a lot of body hair

• you know the bootleg where duke has blonde hair? when she's on the tv she speaks german and i vibe with german duke now

• duke Cannot say fuck and if someone is prude/innocent/idk it's her. the why are you pulling my dick was just to fluster veronica i think

Heather McNamara

• they use she/they pronouns!! just because. she still identifies as a girl though

• mac is autistic of course, it's like semi canon in the musical

• since she's very tall (movie) she stims while standing like being on the tip of her toes or rocking back and forth and the others can be quite annoyed because she moves a lot but they never snap at her

• post musical: veronica finds her stimming endearing and they know it's safe to stim around her, especially since veronica stims herself

• post musical: mac hums as a stim too and you can often find macnamawyer snuggling on the floor while humming in harmonies together

• she used to mask a LOT and it played a big part in her depression. she knows they had to stop themselves from stimming when she was a heather, she had been the weird kid in middle school but now that chandler took her under her wing, she has to pretend to be NT in order to stay in the lifeboat (😭)

• she's a lesbian!! of course she is

• she knows it since she is in middle school and has been """gal pals"""" with chandler since them but she still struggles with it she has comphet yk, but still less than chandler

• chanamara definitely practiced kissing together "to be ready when we'll have to kiss boys" 👀👀👀

• chandler always had a soft spot for mac and tried to hide it by being cruel to duke

• post musical: it took mac some time to understand that duke had nothing against her personally. she was chill with them until chandler died. from that moment she had to prove herself as the new queen bee and mac was a collateral victim

• duke definetely gave her trauma though and mac is in the process of trusting her again

• mac themselves is not a cinnamon roll just yet and she still has to make up for what they've done to others

• mcnamara has nicknames like mcNcheese or macaroni (veronica came up with those)

• they're also a vegetarian and she loves yellow food

• like she ever only eats yellow food actually (autistic thing). that girl is deficient! part of why she looks that fragile and thin

• also i see mcnamara as mixed race with golden/light brown skin and they have this type of curly curly hair but she straightens it all the time so it's only just wavy (once again, to blend in with the heathers)

• her natural hair colour is actually a dark strawberry blonde? her dad is irish and he's a redhead that's why (stole this from @cam-eats-candles hehe) but she dyes it so it's lighter

• post musical: she starts wearing her natural hair!! and goes with her mom to the afro hairdresser to start to get her curls done right (cornrows mac!!)

• their parents divorced (movie) and it's for the best. mac has daddy issues and only goes to her dad to get cute jewellery for their girlfriends 💖 (he doesn't just sell engagement rings. a lot of regular expensive rings, really)

• she's not a baby, she's not weak nor completely innocent and pure!! the girl is a head cheerleader, she's strong and flexible as hell.

Heather Chandler

• heather chandler is Also a lesbian BUT she is on the ace spectrum like demisexual? so yeah she's double disgusted when she "sleeps" with men

• as a queen bee she's also convinced that the only way to exist is through male validation :(

• chandler is taller than duke and veronica but shorter than mac

• chandler's skin is like rosy and it freckles very easily. i see her with the same cloudylike hair she has in the movie, dark blonde, with the red scrunchie only holding back some of her hair

• she is Buff and is genuinely into sports (lesbian jock like regina george)

• she has a sharp hourglass shape her shoulders are broad and her legs long and strong. she could lift veronica against a wall easily. and she did

Veronica Sawyer

• ADHD!! she's been diagnosed for a while but only became medicated post musical

• bisexual!! so bisexual!! without a preference. she's always been open and proud about it and her parents are supportive

• for me veronica is brown, with thick and dark hair and dark brown eyes, midsize, average height

Martha Dunnstock

• that's canon i know, but she's fat, and not the socially acceptable-hourglass kind of fat. big arms! big tummy! double chin! (i see fanart of her just being chubby quite often and it's ANNOYING like that's a big part of her character)

• she's perfectly healthy like this as are many fat people :))

• i also like the hc that her attempt at sewer slide made her permanently disabled and that she keeps using a wheelchair! because it happens, it's important to show it, and it gives me a lot of ideas for cute kindergarten girlfriends prompts 💓💓

• of course realistically being fat AND physically disabled in the 80's was and is not an easy thing to go through but it's in my head so

• she's also a tiny bit taller than veronica

• i don't hate the outfit she wears in the off broadway show, but I like her west end outfit better!! it's a lot more 80's inspired and i totally see her in kidcore/clowncore etc, even if pastels are cool too

• in the current west end version, martha is played by a black woman and she looks amazing! however I've been drawing and imagining martha as east/south east asian, for no reason really?? also idk kinda rubs me the wrong way that in the more official versions of heathers it's always duke that is black, or martha? not the others? hmm

• i'm not comfortable with hcs that exclusively babyfy her or patronise her like a bunny rabbit just bc she's a fat outcast who likes unicorns!! she's not just cute and giggly! martha can and does swear and she Fucks, like mcnamara

• big round glasses + big nose + long brown hair

• taking inspiration from the princess bride line but she's a huge movie nerd. yes she loves happy endings but she also loves horror movies, as long as they have a happy ending

• she never gets a makeover omg y'all just hate people with glasses and a childish aesthetic istg

• she takes this aesthetic further though and

• post musical and high school: she doesn't just wear baggy clothes anymore as she only did that to prevent more bullying. she develops an unique style with a lot of pink and glitter and she's awesome

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ok this is getting long ill probably do more!! tell me what you think <3

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himboarcher · 4 years ago

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reasons i've seen folks say that grad critics hate grad:

they hate travis (in fairness, i’ve def seen some comments of people shitting on trav for the sake of shitting on trav, but it’s not super common and typically gets downvoted into oblivion on reddit.)

it's not balance / travis isn't griffin (???????)

they hate neurodivergent people (again, in fairness, i have seen a handful of comments that could come across this way! but most of the time when travis being ADHD or his NPD is brought up, it's by defenders saying that criticizing travis is ableist because he's neurodivergent or, in one particular comment, infantilizing him bc of it and literally comparing grad to putting a kid's artwork on the fridge. there were some comments early on that pointed to him being a narcissist as the reason for things people disliked about grad, but everyone seems to have realized that that's a shitty train of thought and left it behind.)

they're just toxic haters (again, there are a small handful of people like this because this is the internet, but the genuine criticism greatly outweighs their bullshit. i 100% think that the people, which is mostly just one dude who is also insufferable on reddit, who have been responding rudely to positive tweets under the episode announcements lately are out of line and need to stop. there's been an influx of that lately, presumably because people are frustrated that after over a year of grad going on, there's been no improvement to most of the major issues. that's still no excuse to be a dick to folks, though.)

vs some of the actual reasons i don't like grad:

the racism / racist tropes, and the way that they’ve straight up ignored this criticism and will likely never acknowledge it. pretty wild considering a core tenet of their brand is their willingness to acknowledge when they’ve messed up and do their best to course correct.

clumsy attempts at inclusion that are shallow and often end up being fairly offensive ("...ask me about my wheelchair," anyone?)

on a related note: i don't think that travis had bad intentions, but as an nonbinary person, it feels othering to me that travis only has enby characters give others their pronouns unprompted. i'm thinking specifically of kai here. having listened to their introduction, i don't think it's as bad or awkward as some people have said, but i can't remember travis ever having another NPC tell the PCs their pronouns, especially not a cis character. it's not a huge deal, but it's something that rubbed me the wrong way. admittedly, i don't think it would bother me so much if travis hadn't dropped the ball so much with performative inclusion in the past.

okay i'm putting the rest under a read more because even without getting into all of the problems i have with it, this got Long.

little to no player agency. player choices are ultimately meaningless and have little to no effect on the world. even when he seems to go along with a plan they come up with, it always ends with them having to go back to travis' pre-written script (see: subpoenaing the xorn, but not really because they had to go with travis' original plan of "send the xorn home through the rift".) the players repeatedly get told things about what they think or feel or what they've been doing to an unnecessary degree. fitzroy is the only one who really gets space to play and decide things for himself, and that's only because travis has decided he's the main character.

the NPCs are all too nice and willing to give the PCs anything they ask for and more, unless the PCs are trying to follow their own plan and then the NPCs are completely useless. but honestly, aside from gray, all of the NPCs are just.... nice. travis refuses to even let his antagonists be mean or cruel or even more than just slightly rude, because that'd be a bummer and we don't want that! the "twist" of gordy the lich king actually being polite and chill is not a twist at all because everyone is like that in this world. the NPCs are also wildly overpowered, but then suddenly absolutely useless when the PCs actually want their help.

too many cliffhangers that are dropped immediately at the beginning of the next episode. i feel bad for travis because so many of these cliffhangers actually set up good momentum and seemed like things were gonna get interesting, but almost every single time he just dropped them at the beginning of the next episode. like when althea showed up to interview the boys and the next episode started with travis being like "actually you went to sleep, she said she'll be back tomorrow!"

that time travis specifically said in his exposition dump that the thundermen left their horses behind because they thought the centaurs might be offended by them riding horses, only to later on rag on them for being surprised that the centaurs had horses they could ride.....

also the centaur arc in general, but i already listed racism above, so.

the way that the toxic positivity and parasocial tendencies in the mcelroy fandoms have made a large portion of the fandom take ANY criticism as a personal attack on travis and/or on themselves for enjoying something others consider bad, either morally or just quality-wise. it’s okay to admit that something you like has problematic elements or just isn’t as good as it once was. you can and should engage critically with the media you consume.

related to above: the way travis has handled genuine criticism, which is to throw public tantrums on his twitter or make weird passive aggressive tweets & ultimately ignore all the genuine criticism and advice he's been offered by claiming it's all subjective, even after he specifically asked for it and set up an email for folks to send in genuine, objective advice for him (after he threw a tantrum on twitter and replied to someone's criticism publicly, which resulted in his followers dogpiling on that person bc how dare they insult their internet best friend). while i was writing this last night, he actually announced that he’s taking a break from Twitter and acknowledged that he’s been using it as an echo chamber where he can easily get validation from folks, and honestly i’m happy for him that he’s recognized this problem and is stepping away for a while! i hope he’ll genuinely use this time to reflect on how he’s been behaving and find a more healthy way to use social media. i’m leaving this point in because i think his Twitter being such a positive echo chamber was encouraging him to do stuff like this, and him somewhat acknowledging his behavior doesn’t mean it can no longer be discussed.

rainer. extremely cool concept in theory and i was very into it until that awkward "does anyone want to ask about my wheelchair?" moment. also when travis had her use her mobility aid to RAM INTO A DOOR instead of just fucking knocking???? also all the times travis has tried to force a romantic relationship between her and fitzroy, despite fitzroy displaying no interest in her in that way. also, just to clarify: as an ace person, i don’t think this is aphobic! (and it’s kind of a stretch to call it that imo, especially since griffin never explicitly said that fitzroy's aromantic!) i just think it’s weird and awkward and a little uncomfortable for me personally, mostly because it reminds me of the times i’ve been in similar situations.

less of a problem than a lot of the other stuff and more just bad writing, but the forced emotional moments. in general, nothing in grad feels earned (why are the boys heading a war? when they have multiple actual heroes with combat experience on their side and a supposedly powerful secret organization? and the thundermen are like 21 years old max and have only had like ~10 fights in the entire campaign?) but there've been a couple times where travis has tried to force unearned emotional moments, presumably because he knows people enjoyed those with the last campaigns. but the difference is that in balance, the big emotional moments happened because they were earned. in grad, it's just travis throwing a baby pegasus at us for a few minutes and then the next time she shows up, it's supposed to be a tearful goodbye.

there are absolutely no stakes. remember when the thundermen got told that if they left, gray would kill 10 students? and then they left and came back and it turns out that what gray actually meant was, "i'll tie ten students who are mostly nameless NPCs to a tree and throw some dogs at them that you can easily stop in time, then throw a tantrum because how dare you but i'll leave before you can really do anything to hurt me lol" travis did have fitzroy's magic get taken away, but like. it didn't really do anything? also all he had to get it back was be coerced into using drugs by an authority figure and trip in the woods?

we're told that the school is weird and the hero system is corrupt, but the world of nua is still presented as more of a liberal utopia than anything? althea getting fired because of a corrupt villain is the only time we've somewhat seen corruption, but even then, she was still allowed to get (what seems to me, anyway, but admittedly i don't know for sure bc nothing about the HOG makes much sense) a fairly important job from the very people who stripped her of her hero license or whatever the fuck heroes need?

travis doesn't actually seem to understand how capitalism or bureaucracy works and just chalks up everything to "red tape." also more on the rest of the boys than him specifically, but the "let's destroy capitalism!" thing turning into just pushing some filing cabinets over................... okay.

and one last piece of extremely subjective criticism: it's just kind of.... boring. i think a lot of people, myself included, would be willing to overlook 90% of the problems with graduation if it didn't feel like such a slog to get through.

also people saying that we can't or shouldn't criticize graduation because it's "free" is absolutely absurd for several reasons. first, something being free does not make it above criticism. second, there ARE people who directly financially support the show with monthly donations. three, there's a difference between something being free and something being not for profit. podcasting is their full time job. they make their living off of money made from TAZ and MBMBAM (and probably their other shows to a lesser extent). this not a fun home game that they are graciously recording and sharing with us. it is a product they are producing that they make money off of, both from ads in the episodes and merch & books based off of these podcasts. they have marketed themselves as professionals, and both griffin and travis have been on panels where they are marketed as professional DMs and appear alongside other professional DMs (which makes it incredibly frustrating when people say that travis is just a newbie DM and we can't criticize him because of that. if he's a newbie, then he should not be taking part of panels as a professional DM where he speaks as an expert). TAZ is free in the same way that an episode of NCIS is free. i may not pay for it directly, but the creators are paid to create it and profit off of me consuming this product. so saying we should be grateful for any mcelnoise that the benevolent good boys share with us and that we're not allowed to criticize it "because it's free" is absolutely wild.

#negativity cw #i guess #anyway this is not meant to say that you cannot enjoy grad.#but i'm tired of folks on this website acting like there aren't genuine problems with it #and saying that people just dislike it bc they hate travis etc etc #taz graduation #i genuinely don't expect anyone to read this bc it's so long #but here ya go.#long post

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puyo-fever · 3 years ago

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puyo character queer hcs! I explain some lengthily (mainly the aro hcs) so I’ll put it under a read more.

disclaimer that these are personal hcs for fun and you dont have to take any seriously at all!

ringo-aroflux bisexual

ringo is just kinda confused with her feelings in general but accepts that she’s somewhere on the aro spectrum. well, she knows she probably doesnt like people romantically, but sometimes she just feels things(tm) ya know. she’s been qpps with maguro for a while and sometimes she just has moments where she’s like “do I like him romantically?” but after a few hours or smth it’s back to “yeah he’s my best friend!” and it just. happens sometimes out of the blue and she’s just like okay brain thanks.

in general, she and maguro are pretty affectionate. definitely lots of hand holding, kisses on the cheek etc. but they probably just do it when they’re not around their friends n family bc everyone just ASSUMES stuff and risukuma is the only one who KNOWS knows that they’re qpps and wont make ringo uncomfy by asking if they’re dating.

amitie-genderqueer/trans lesbian

I think trans amitie is a very pog headcanon, but I think genderqueer also fits her very well! she doesn’t wanna be binded to any sort of binary, she just wants to be gender. and the lesbian one is mostly derived from the fact all the characters I ship her with are either girls or charas I hc to be nonbinary, though it’s not a hc I think abt a lot admittedly.

arle-aromantic

Listen it’s just really funny for satan to simp after her when she’s just not interested in anyone in general.

She feels sexual attraction, but is still unsure of where it’s directed towards, as she hasnt had a chance to explore it. so for now she’s fine with not id-ing it.

carbuncle-carbuncle

carbuncle

schezo-aromantic bisexual

-I don’t think he’s into romance. could be qpps with arle? idk, but he and rulue and friends with benefits, it’s just casual though

rulue-trans het

we all know rulue likes satan men but I think she’s also transfem.

draco-lesbian

she and lidelle are girl liker sibling solidarity. like, cmon, she seeks out cute girls to compete with them?? and keeps calling them pretty so

witch-bisexual

I’m not too sure how canon those old games are with her lore but I do like that tidbit abt her having a crush on either arle or schezo at some point.

maguro-nonbinary bisexual

Nonbinary (afab) is because of kin reasons. He’s masc leaning but is fine with some feminine terms (uses he/she/they pronouns). Bi is bc he just gives off the vibes.

risukuma-ace

Not much to say here. He’s not sure about how he handles romantic feelings himself so he doesnt label it, and he simply doesn’t feel sexual attraction.

feli-genderqueer demi

(Would like to make clear by demi I mean both demiromantic and demisexual)

Demi is because. Well, minus the whole lemres thing she takes a while to be trusting of others in general. Really doesn’t start to feel things until well into a friendship/relationship.

klug-nonbinary bisexual

Have you seen ppt2 and the 20th anni cutscenes. Peak Bisexual disaster.

Anyways he/him nonbinary just feels right for klug.

sig-nebularomantic greysexual

(quick explanation for those unfamiliar with the term: identity under the aromantic spectrum that’s defined as mixing up/not being able to separate romantic and platonic feelings due to being autistic)

This is one of those “oh that seems kinda obvious” hcs that I’m attached to anyways. I’ve always seen sig as autistic and in general uninterested in romance, though he is in a romantic relationship. I personally think he DOES sometimes get those feelings he simply doesnt act on them unless he knows his partner wants him to.

Also a personal headcanon is that lemres helped sig out in figuring out a label for him, as they talk about aromanticness a lot.

raffina-pan

I just think that pansexual makes sense for raffina? not much to say here.

lidelle-lesbian

again, not much to say here. lidelle girl kisser, I can’t see her with boys at all.

lemres-non binary aroace

nonbinary is bc of kinnie reasons again so lets skip over that.

for lemres. he’s like, repulsed at the thought of being in a romantic relationship in general! whenever his parents would bring up the idea of a suitor he’d be pretty uncomfy. he was never interested in it, probably tried it once when he was asked out by someone after he ran away and went “nah”. while he’s fine with compliments sent his way in a fun matter (like being called a wife) he’s pretty offput by people who try to pursue a relationship with him. he’s really patient with feli bc she’s young and he doesnt wanna be rude by saying her fortune telling skills are wrong but man can she not take a hint.

As for sexual attraction, while he doesn’t feel it, he isnt repulsed by it like he is with romantic relationships.

tee-trans asexual

transmasc tee just..makes sense to me? I cant really explain why but he 100% wears a binder.

Tee is sex repulsed. not much to say. Hasn’t figured out his romantic orientation.

ess-trans bi

as with tee, trans ess just makes sense. transmasc and transfem solidarity.

bi isnt for any particular reason, she just feels like she’d be bi ya know.

jay and elle-demigender

they both aren’t very attached to the concept of gender. but also they are. yes. no. it’s complicated.

ai-gay

he’s the token cis of the tetra crew but also the token mlm nerd.

ecolo-agender aromantic

oh ecolo. funky blob guy. they’re 100% not giving a shit about gender and all those concepts, ecolo is just ecolo.

ecolo isn’t really romance repulsed per se, but they prefer friendships over romantic relationships, and cant see themselves in a relationship. wants to be qpps with ringo but she’s not that certain about the idea. doesn’t know what sex is.

squares-gay

*points* guy kisser.

marle-lesbian

*points* girl kisser.

#puyo puyo #puyo puyo tetris #queer #lgbtq+#headcanons #pride #man this was long

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thedreadvampy · 4 years ago

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Hey Ruth! I noticed you've talked in the past about asexuality in quite a negative manner. As an ace-person (who has received backlash for it) I was wondering: do you still uphold these opinions?

Hey! I have in the past said I don’t really...like people popping up in my ask box asking me My Opinion On Asexuality, but I do appreciate you asking me as someone I kinda know and with your face turned on, so I’m gonna aim to answer in the macro. Though I mean it depends on what the opinions...are? I have had a lot of opinions over the time I’ve had this blog and I don’t necessarily know what all of them were or which ones have concerned you. I can give you a top-level view of how I see my views, though (however, since I have been largely holding off on answering this kind of ask for Literally A Year Now this is less an answer to your specific question and more an answer to the last year of asks)

(also if I get dogpiled in my inbox for Having Bad Asexuality Opinions which I do every time I talk about asexuality regardless of what I actually say then. my phone is broken I won’t know about it :) so I feel untouchable)

I don’t think I hold a negative opinion of asexuality as an identity (I say I don’t think bc we all have blind spots)? I have a lot of very important people in my life who are asexual, aromantic or aroace and. I mean it feels pretty condescending to say ~uwu it’s valid~ bc like. ace and aro people don’t really need my input to validate their identity. but a) it seems like a pretty accurate way to describe their experience and b) I know a lot of them have had a really huge boost from finding a name and community to fit their experience and have found that really helpful, and I’ve seen that make a huge difference in people’s lives and I’m really happy to watch my friends come to understand themselves and feel comfortable and accepted in a part of themselves they had felt really alienated or stigmatised by. In a broader sense, I think there’s huge value in decentralising romance and sex in our assumptions of What Human Happiness Means and for some people that’s not the most important thing, and for some it’s just not interesting.

So like. I find it difficult to really express these opinions in any meaningful way because my opinion on asexuals and aromantics is much like my opinion on trans people or idk like people of colour. like very obviously those people exist and very obviously those people don’t deserve to be marginalised or stigmatised but it would feel. weird and performative to just make a post saying like “Asexuality Is Good And Valid, I Am Pro It” bc again like. who needs my permission or cares about my opinion. it’s not a Good Thing To Do it’s just. a thing you are that shouldn’t be treated as a bad thing.

however. and I suspect that this is what you’re referring to. while I love and appreciate ace and aro people, I think building communities and active support for ace and aro people is valuable and needed and, as above, I think Asexuality Is Good And Valid I Am Pro It, I do take some issue with elements of how discussions around asexuality are framed online (pretty much only online, I really haven’t run into the kind of black-and-white thinking in in-person queer spaces)

and I also. think there are some issues with people extrapolating their experience of their own sexuality onto the world in a way which. I’m just going to say a lot of the time when I talk about The Ace Discourse in a negative way it’s around people assuming that the world is split into a binary between ace and allo people, or assuming that only aspec people experience a nuanced or complex or fluid relationship to their sexuality while pigeonholing allosexuality into a pretty flat image of sex and romance focus. and I have always felt like this does a massive disservice not just to people who don’t identify with aspec labels, but also to the general hope that we could work against the expectation that there’s a Standard Amount To Value Sex/Romance - I think that the assumption that there are aspec people and then Everyone Else Has The Normal Type and Level of Attraction just. reinforces the idea that there’s a “Normal” type and level of attraction. which is ultimately pretty self-defeating and also just. observably untrue.

and this division of the world into Aspec People and Allo People also has some other weird knockon effects - I don’t think there’s anything intrinsically wrong with identities like gray ace or demi or other aspec labels beyond asexual and aromantic, but I do think that the way those labels are used is often. unhelpful. and they’re defined in such personal, subjective ways that you get weirdnesses sometimes like people Diagnosing Each Other With Demisexual or people saying ‘you can’t talk about this experience you share because it’s an Aspec Experience’ and again. there isn’t a concrete material experience there because the whole experience of romantic and sexual attraction, what that feels like and how sharply divisible it is is very, very personal and subjective. and everyone has different experiences of those and will name those experiences differently.

there’s also. historically a minority of Big Ace Blogs that kind of sneer at allosexuality or who would hijack posts about other issues to derail them to asexuality. but I don’t think they were ever representative of the community as a whole and I certainly think that inasmuch as those blogs remain around they’re a legacy of the Long-Ago (and a lot of them are trolls imo)

but there is. an issue I take that does seem to be more currently live which is the question of allo privilege. I think personally that framing all allosexuals/alloromantics as privileged over all aspec people on the basis of feeling sexual/romantic attraction is provably untrue in a world where people, particularly queer people, are actively oppressed and marginalised for expressing non-normative sexuality. it isn’t that I don’t think asexuality and aromanticism isn’t marginalised and stigmatised, because it visibly is, but it seems pretty reductive to boil it down to a binary yes/no privilege when both sexualisation and desexualisation are so actively tied into other forms of marginalisation (this is what I was trying to express in the argument about Martin a while ago - sex and sexuality are so often disincentivised for fat, queer, disabled and neuroatypical people that it doesn’t...feel like a reclamation that those tend to be the characters that get fanonised as ace where slim, straight, able-bodied and neurotypical characters aren’t. like it’s more complex than a binary privilege equation; sex and romance are incentivised and stigmatised differently at the intersection of oppressions and. for example. in a world where gay conversion therapy and religious oppression of gay and SGA people is so often focused specifically on celibacy and on punishing the act of sexual attraction, I don’t think it’s a reasonable framing to say that a gay allosexual man has privilege over an aroace man on the basis of his attraction)

so those are like. things I would consider myself to feel actively negative about in online discourse (and again. in online discourse. not in how I relate to asexuality or aromanticism or aspec identities in general but in the framing and approaches people take towards discussing it in a very specific bubble).

but also. um. the main criticism I have of the online discourse culture of asexuality is that there are things I don’t have experience of that I have mentioned, when asked, that I don’t personally understand the meaning of but I don’t need to understand them to appreciate that they’re useful/meaningful to others. things like

the difference between QPRs, asexual romantic relationships and close friendships

how you know the difference between romantic attraction and friendship

the distinction between sexual attraction and a desire to have sex with someone for another reason

and I hope I’ve generally been clear that this is. honest lack of understanding and not condemnation. I personally have a very muddled sense of attraction and often have difficulty identifying the specifics of any of my own emotional needs so like. it’s a closed book for me at the moment, how you would identify the fine distinctions between types of want when I’m still at step 1: identify That You Want Something Of Some Sort, Eventually, Through Trial And Error. but I think I’ve always been explicit that this isn’t a value judgement it’s just a gap in my own knowledge and yet. every single time I’ve said anything other than enthusiastic “yes I understand this and I love it and it’s good and valid” (and again. I have not gone out of my way to talk about it I have mostly only mentioned it because people keep asking me to talk about it) I have got a massive rush of anger and accusations of aphobia and “just shut up if you don’t know what you’re talking about but also answer my 30 questions to prove you think Correct Things about asexuality” and. I understand that this comes from a place of really unpleasant and aggressive backlash towards the ace community so it’s a sensitivity with a lot of people but like. it doesn’t seem proportional.

also I feel like ever since I hit like 700 followers my Tumblr life has been a constant cycle of people asking me Are You An Ace Inclusionist Are You An Exclus Are You An Aphobe Justify Your Opinion On Asexuality which. eventually yeah I’ve got pretty snippy about the whole thing. but you know. fuck it I’m just gonna lay it out and if you or anyone else is uncomfortable following me based on those opinions then I’m sorry to hear that and I will be sad to see you not want to engage with me any more but I also think that’s absolutely your prerogative. however I will not be taking questions at this time (and not just bc my phone’s broken) - demands for an argument about this Are Going To Be Ignored so if you want to go then go.

so like the big question I reckon is Do You Think Asexuality Is Queer and

yes. no. maybe. I don’t understand the question what does it mean for an identity to be queer?

there are spaces and conversations where any form of aromanticism or asexuality makes sense as a relevant identity. talking about hegemonic expectations of normative romance. building community. combatting the idea that heterosexual missionary married sex between a man and a woman is the only rewarding or valuable form of relationship or intimacy.

there are spaces where I think heterosexual aros/heteromantic cis aces don’t. have a more meaningful or direct experience of the issues than allo cishets. because while being aro or ace or aspec has a direct impact on those people on a personal and relational level, disclosure is largely a choice, and the world at large sees them as straight. they don’t have the lived experience of being visibly nonconforming that SGA people and aroace people do. they may still be queer but there’s a lot of conversations where they bring a lot of the baggage of being Straight People (because. even if you’re ace or aro you can still be straight in your romantic or sexual attraction and if your relationships are all outwardly straight then you don’t necessarily have an intimate personal understanding of being marginalised from mainstream society by dint of your sexuality). this doesn’t make you Not Queer in the same way that being a bi person who’s only ever been in m/f relationships is still queer, but in both cases a) you don’t magically have a personal experience of societal oppression through the transitive properties of Being Queer and b) it’s really obnoxious to talk as if you’re The Most Oppressed when other people are trying to have a conversation about their lived experience of societal oppression. and they’re within their rights to say ‘we’re talking about the experience of being marginalised for same gender/non-heterosexual attraction and you’re straight, could you butt out?’)

(I very much object to the assumption coming from a lot of exclus that “cishet ace” is a term that can reasonably be applied to non-orientated aroace people though. het is not a default it really extremely doesn’t make sense to treat people who feel no attraction as Straight By Default. when I were a lad I feel like we mostly understood “asexual” to mean that identity - non-orientated aroace - and while I think it’s obvious that a lot of people do find value in using a more split-model because. well. some people are both gay/straight/bi and aro/ace, and it’s good that language reflects that. but I do think it’s left a gap in the language to simply refer to non-attracted people. this isn’t a criticism of anything in particular - there’s a constant balancing act in language between specificity and adaptability and sometimes a gain for one is a loss for the other)

some queer conversations and spaces just. aren’t built with aces in mind. and that isn’t a flaw. some spaces aren’t built with men in mind, but that doesn’t mean men can’t be queer. some conversations are about Black experiences of queerness but that doesn’t mean non-Black people can’t be queer. not all queer spaces will focus on ace needs but that doesn’t mean asexuality isn’t queer, or that queerness is opposed to aceness - sex, sexuality, romance and dating are all really important things to a lot of queer people, especially those whose sexuality and romantic relationships are often stigmatised or violently suppressed in wider society. there should be gay bars, hookup apps, gay and trans friendly sex education, making out at Pride, leather parades and topless dyke marches and porn made by and for queer people, romantic representation in media of young and old gay, bi and trans couples kissing and snuggling and getting married and saying sloppy romantic things. and there should be non-sexual queer spaces, there should be discussions around queerness that don’t suppose that a monogamous romantic relationship is what everyone’s fighting for, sex ed should be ace inclusive, etc.

I think the whole question of inclusionism vs exclusionism is based on a weird underlying assumption that If An Identity Is Queer All Queer Spaces Should Directly Cater To That. like. aspec identities can be queer and it can be totally reasonable for there to be queer spaces that revolve around being sexual and romantic and there can be conversations it’s not appropriate or productive to centre asexuality and aspec experiences in and we can recognise that not all queer people do prioritise or have any interest in sex or romance. in the same way that there’s value in centring binary trans experiences sometimes and nonbinary experiences at other times but both of those conversations should recognise that neither binary or nonbinary gender identity is a Universal Queer Experience.

anyway that one probably isn’t one of the opinions you were asking about but I have been wanting to find a way to express it for a while so you’re getting it: the Ruth Thedreadvampy Inclusionism Take.

uh. it’s 1:30 on a work night so I have been typing too long. if there was an opinion you were specifically thinking of that I haven’t mentioned, chuck me another ask specifically pointing to what you want me to clarify my thinking on. sometimes I gotta be honest I’ve just been kind of careless in my framing (thinking of the Martin Fucks debacle where I spent ages insisting I didn’t say Martin couldn’t be aroace then read back like two days later and realised that I had said “he’s not aroace” bc I had written the post at 2am without proofreading and had meant to say “unless you think he’s aroace”) so I May Well Not Stand By Some Posts or might Stand By Them With Clarification

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epitheterasedgen · 4 years ago

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heck it. self-indulgence time.

✨EE aspec headcanons✨

(obviously, romance mentions below! a few of the characters are Token Allos (TM))

Molly: the aroace kid who's always like "yeah I don't really get romance but I guess I'll get it when I'm older" and keeps saying that until she's almost 30 and finally someone's like "wow you've never dated before?! are you aro/ace?" and she's like "oh huh I guess I probably am" and then it's never a big deal again

she's also super grossed out by the concept of sex, even well into adulthood, which is Yet Another Reason why it is absolutely perfect for Percy to adopt her because it's just a topic that Never comes up in their household

Sylvie: honestly the only character I don't have a solid grasp on in terms of attraction, though I HC swap!Sylvie as alloaro so I guess canon Sylvie is probably the same, it's just not relevant yet since he's young and a late bloomer in terms of hormones. plus he's just focused on his work more than anything else

Gio: I fear what Jello is going to do to him in the future, bc this boy gives off the MOST oblivious aromantic vibes EVER and I know Jello's track record. but listen idc what happens in canon, Giovanni's dream future is to live with all his Boys as platonic housemates and he has no idea he's aro because romance literally isn't something he even THINKS about. he's probably also ace with the same reasoning

Mera: my Token Allo (TM). she's a die-hard hopeless romantic and moronsexual, but that's not really headcanon that's just canon I mean cmon—

Indus: it took me a stupidly long time to realize that my interpretation of Indus is just "romance-positive partnering aro" because that's not a genre I dip into a lot but it sure fits him. he doesn't really! understand romance?? or actually feel "romantic" attraction. but he likes Lady Mera and he'd do anything to make her happy! :D so if she wants him to bring her flowers and a candlelit dinner, he'll do it!! she just better be prepared for him to pick a bunch of dandelion weeds and accidentally set the table on fire

...actually now that I'm typing this out, it explains why Mera/Indus bothers me so much less than other ships aghasdkflgh

Percy: realistically she's just the Oblivious Aroace (TM) along with Giovanni. same as Gio she has no idea she's aroace because it's just not even something she Thinks about, but if someone gave her a vocabulary lesson she'd be like "oh yes that fits me :)" and continue to not perceive romantic advancements even if they hit her in the face. she's already married to JUSTICE, sorry everyone <3

(I portray her as more apothiromantic/romance-repulsed on my RP blog but that's just because projecting onto Percy is cheaper than therapy)

Ramsey: ok highkey my headcanons on Ramsey shift depending on the AU (don't ask how many AUs I have hahaha) but normally he falls somewhere in the range of "allo ally" who Knows All The Terms (from spending so much time online) and is probably the person who gives Percy a vocabulary lesson despite being allo himself

Zora: as much as I'd LOVE to see an aspec Zora, I think she'd look and act a bit different from canon Zora. I swear I didn't mean to make both main antagonists the Token Allos, but they're also the ones most fans want to date so y'know what, whatever. I personally think cowboys are overrated but y'all go crazy

Howie: CANON AROACE KING... specifically I imagine him as anti-romance, not because it repulses him, but because all that time you waste on "love" could be used for DOING YOUR JOB!!! (in a serious setting I'd say Howie isn't ideal aro rep bc he embodies a lot of negative stereotypes about aros, but EE is a comedy and people need to lighten up about the fact that EVERYONE is gonna have weirdly exaggerated personality traits; the show literally wouldn't be funny if they didn't; seriously guys leave Jello alone about the rep)

Meryl: ok she's not in EE but this is MY blog and I pick the comfort characters! anyway Meryl experiences a lot of alterous attraction AKA she has trouble distinguishing between very different forms of attraction (platonic/romantic/sensual/sexual/ect.) and they all just sorta blur together into one big Anxious Mess (TM). as opposed to Percy and Gio, she spends a LOT of time thinking about this and trying to figure out What she's feeling, but it never helps and at this point she's pretty much given up trying. she just needs a hug ok

in various AUs I've put her in romantic, platonic, QPP, and co-parental relationships, and she's pretty much happy with whatever :)

Eros: I feel the need to include him because I included Meryl, also bc while he is allo as heck and has definitely dated in the past, he's also just a super uplifting guy who uses flirting as a form of affection and to make people feel good. he's one of those "somehow weirdly pure" characters because he's so unabashed about everything and most of his flirting is sphallolalia, which is one of my new favorite words I just learned and means "flirting that leads nowhere." he also just has a deep appreciation for a good laugh, and a lot of his joke wells are pickup lines!

#aspec headcanons #hmmm do I tag this with anything else?#nah

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silenthillmutual · 4 years ago

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artemy - he/she/they nonbinary. amab or afab? anoneofyourfuckingbusinessab. not seeking surgery for anything and gender nonconfirming regardless of agab or transition status. demi & bi. eventually their gender is just “dad”.

daniil - he/him transmasc gay. thinks he’s a binary trans man but he’s lying to himself about it. he’s only gender conforming to specifically gay goth genders.

clara - they/it transfem nonbinary lesbian. it picks pronouns specifically to make you uncomfortable. may also use neopronouns once they learn about them. makes up a ton for fun and decides to pester the other healers into using them.

rubin - agender. doesn’t care what pronouns you use for him as long as you leave them the fuck alone. arospec-aspec but bi.

bad grief - they/them nonbinary babeyyyy. grief sells gender on the black market B) they never had a “coming out” because they were never “in.” also bi as fuck and polyamorous.

lara - not sure what her gender is doing but she’s always changing her pronouns up bc she’s never quite satisfied with them. every week it’s a new set. she’s not sure if she’s gay or bi or what. her depression is too in-the-way for her to have a clear idea of her sexuality :(

yulia - lesbian, she/her. her gender is librarian. she’s the reason 98% of the women in town on gorkhon are wlw.

andrey - polyam aro pansexual, he/him. leans more toward liking men. binary trans man. got his top surgery done in one of the countries he is now banned from. very eager to show off his top scars.

peter - theoretically he is polyam ace panromantic but his depression is too severe for him to be in a relationship right now. they don’t have a gender for the longest time but then they adopt grace and share the dad gender with artemy. he/they.

anna - he/him lesbian. too ocd to conform to any gender standards. touch-averse.

eva - she/her genderfluid polyamorous pansexual with a lean toward women. her polycule is enormous. she has too much love in her heart to just date one person.

maria - she/her trans woman just like her mother. not strictly binary, like daniil she wants in on That Goth Shit. her gender is elegant haunted victorian lady. someone told me aro maria once and now i can totally see that. if she has an orientation beyond that she is wlw.

victor - transhet! transhet! transhet! he/him. also aspec as fuck he had the love of his life in nina and he is not interested in more thank you :) he was a happy trophy husband and now he is just going to be a dad.

georgiy - cis (derogatory) and aromantic. i swear i’m not making him aro bc i don’t like him i just genuinely do not see him experiencing romantic attraction. faux-progressive transphobe. you know the type.

big vlad - cis (derogatory) and straight (derogatory). can and will deadname you and call you slurs.

vlad jr - cis and regrettably bisexual. he’s also The Foot Guy(TM) [actually andrey is also A Foot Guy but vlad jr is way more up front about it]

mark - mark is NOT a human being he is a CONCEPT you MAY address him with he/him pronouns if you so wish but that is really more for YOUR comfort than his. classic mark is bi but patho2 mark is gay in the most pretentious way possible. they are not the same person.

katerina - she/her momgender. polyamorous and bi. she had a huge crush on nina and victoria. she and her husband are one of those couples looking for a third. could be you!

saburov - cis. maybe bi but he’s not sure. he doesn’t really care because he has his wife and that’s enough. monamorous but okay with katerina being polyamorous. probably will deadname you because he’s easily confused.

oyun - trans man, obviously, he has top surgery scars :/ he/they. patho 2 oyun is your gay uncle. had top surgery because the boobs got in the way.

aspity - trans & nonbinary lesbian. she/her if you’re friends, they/them if it makes you uncomfortable. shabnak is not just the type of creature she is it is also her gender. president of the tog gsa (that is why people are always in her house)

block - cis and was straight up until he met daniil and now he’s having Questions

aglaya - she/her binary trans lesbian. sorry i don’t have much more to add i’m getting burnt out sdfsdfs i want to talk about mental illness hcs now

#icarus.txt

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