#this is so shitty but I just needed to fucking write something
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
nothing's gonna hurt you, baby
[jj maybank x reader]
summary: “you don't have to worry about me.” your voice is muffled but he can hear it well. the way his fingertips graze against your back under your shirt almost puts you to sleep right then. “'course I do.” jj pokes your waist, tone bordering on indignant. “you're my girl, why wouldn't I worry about you?” pairing: jj maybank x f!reader w.c: 1.2k warnings/content: child abuse (implied); description of wounds, blood and violence; hurt/comfort.
A/N: in honor of obx 4, here's a jj maybank hurt/comfort blurb. just fyi, he's alive and happy and he ran off to yucatan in the show, that shitty ending they wrote did not fucking happened. anyways, enjoy my silly writing.
navi
masterpost
obx masterlist
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
“ow!” you hissed, leaning away as your forehead stung as soon as the antiseptic made contact with the wound. “it stings.” you provided helplessly, lips tugging downwards.
watching as jj's mouth quirked up slightly, you glared at him. he looked away to grab another gauze, unaffected by your dramatic behavior. not so dramatic because the cut was fresh so in your defense you had every right to react that way.
“it's supposed to sting, means it's working.”
you hold back a complaint as he presses the gauze near the cut again. his blue eyes attentively stare back at you, he waits for your whining but it doesn't come.
“so you mean I'm supposed to enjoy pain because it's good for me? it's like we're all condemned to the same fate, aren't we?”
“my pretty little philosopher or whatever,” jj tutted, pressing a kiss to your temple before he stood up to throw the used materials away. the couch was comfortable as you adjusted your body to lay back down, making sure not to turn on your side so jj's job wouldn't go to waste. “should I call pope here? cause I'm not gonna be able to keep up with your existence theories.”
“existencial.”
“yeah, that.” you let out a hum in appreciation as he ran his fingers across your ankles, the coldness of his rings grazing against your skin. that will definitely help you fall asleep. silence stretched on for a few minutes and the room was enveloped with you and jj basking in each other's presence.
until, well… until he broke it.
“how did you get this?”
“told you, cabinet door.”
“right, which one was it this time? kitchen or bathroom?”
you felt like a little kid being caught doing what you weren't supposed to be doing. by his tone, you already knew he was onto your lie but you stayed silent, forcing your face to be blank of any emotion.
jj had caught you with bruises before. the keyword being caught because you'd never willingly show it to him. he already had too much on his plate to deal with, he didn't need you to add to it.
it wasn't the first time, thus his little gentle jab at your lie.
“cuddle me.” you requested — more like ordered — an outstretched hand in his direction as you ignored his previous question with grace and not all in an unsubtle way. “jayj”
your boyfriend engulfed you in his warmth, arms wrapping around your middle as you settled in his chest, cheek resting against the soft fabric of his jumper.
“you don't have to worry about me.” your voice is muffled but he can hear it well. the way his fingertips graze against your back under your shirt almost puts you to sleep right then.
“'course I do.” jj pokes your waist, tone bordering on indignant. “you're my girl, why wouldn't I worry about you?”
“your girl?” you placed your chin on the back of your hand, licking your lips contemplatively. “a bit possessive, isn't it?”
something itched in your chest upon noticing the small dimple on his left cheek when he gave you that charming disarming smile of his. “you think so?” he uttered, hands intertwining behind your back as he shrugged when his face twitched in amusement. “but you are, aren't you?”
“am I?” you pretended to be clueless. “not sure... hey.” you squirmed when he threatened to tickle you.
“hey.” he mocked with a slightly annoying voice, warning a slap on his chest. jj let out a deep chuckle. “stop, stop. okay.” he held your hands, lifting your knuckles to his lips so he could kiss them, blue eyes glinting with mischief staring you down. that glint soon tuned down to something serious, it was when you knew he was about to initiate a topic you wanted to run away from.
you were cornered.
jj's thumb touched your cheek, there was also a small yellowish bruise beginning to heal near your cheekbone, besides the cut in your forehead, which was what concerned him more.
this one is older, he observed the bruise, caressing the spot ever so gently as if you were made of glass. you shouldn't have bruises or cuts or anything that gives you pain.
“jayj, it's fine—”
“is it bad?”
you know what his words mean and that proved he didn't believe in your lies. why would he? he went through the same on a daily basis before his dad took off god knows where. you honestly hope he never comes back because if luke maybank ever thinks of laying a hand on jj again, you'd bury him alive.
but anyway, you admitted the truth, laying out what truly was going on inside your house.
“just when she gets mad.” you offered, looking back at your hands curling together. “really, it's fine, don't worry about me.”
his forehead creases and you think he's about to order you to shut up but instead he squeezes your hand. anger is never his go-to emotion with you.
“I worry, always. can you tell me how this one happened? it's deeper.” he asked, touching the spot in your forehead beside the cut he had cleaned up.
your eyes followed his carefully but your body was relaxed as it never had been whenever you talked about that subject.
“I, um... I dodged her slap. kind of. I ducked down— or tried to.” you winced at your explanation and at the memory. “anyways, the cut was because of her ring.”
his jaw clenched but his touch never shifted to anything other than delicate.
“i'm sorry.”
“don’t be.” you said, smiling up at him. “it’s not your fault, but thanks.”
“you shouldn't be used to this.” jj said firmly, brushing a stray strand of your hair behind your ear, his gaze far away. “you can come stay at the chateau if you want, you know? we always have space.”
“thank you for caring, but I'll be fine.”
“I know.” he shrugged. “but I mean, when you're not, you have a place to run to. you have me.”
and yes, you knew that, technically. but your fucked brain thought if you shared your home life with him, this would make you a burden, you never ever wanted that. you didn't want him to get tired of you and realize he was better off with someone else who wasn't so complicated.
“I know I have you.”
“do you?”
“I love you.” you offered as if that was supposed to be a strong argument.
jj raised a brow. “I love you too and that's why I want you to open up to me.” he explained gently, thumb running against your cheek. “call me. find me. I'll be there. I'll find you wherever you are, alright?”
you hummed, agreeing with him in his request. a smile gracing your lips. “okay.”
he shifted in bed, leaning down to kiss your forehead. “if it depends on me, nothing’s gonna hurt you,” he mumbled against your forehead as you wrapped an arm around his middle and basked in his warmth.
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
taglist: @hoeshissworld
#reader insert#jj maybank#jj x reader#jj maybank x reader#jj maybank x you#jj maybank x y/n#outer banks fanfiction#jj maybank imagine#jj maybank blurb#outer banks blurb#obx fic#obx fanfiction
124 notes
·
View notes
Note
What made me furious and decide not to watch the rest of S8 (at least live, until and unless they fix bucks storyline) is the goddamn fact that Tim literally did this to fuck with the general audience who were finally getting back on track and getting interested in Bucks storyline like goddamn.
If you shot 8x06, BEFORE 8x05, why make 8x05 the way you made it???????? Just make Tommy a bit more of an asshole??? ((I'm not even kidding!!!)) Like you COULD have made him be dismissive of Bucks obsession with the 'curse', you could have made him feel bitter and slightly projecting on Buck's found family ((a throw away line like how 'oh didn't know you had a group text, frown)) something, ANYTHING that would have made us feel a bit more prepared for 8x06 and Buck's 1.0 era??! ((And btw YES it is biphobic to suggest that bi people need to sleep around to figure out what they want, for god's sake Oliver, just don't do episodic interviews anymore I BEG)).
But instead, we get sweet, understanding Tommy, we get fluffs pillow softly and talks as a non believer to a ghost Tommy, we get excited for love again Buck, and THEN you do this?????!!!
Unforgivable. Fuck you Tim. You've just told millions of people in a shitty af political climate that older gay men who struggle with their need for survival and loneliness that they're gonna end up alone if they date a bi man. Sorry that's AN interpretation. It is LOUSY representation. It is LOUSY and cruel writing. You messed with in a too big way on this one. So. Yes. Lost this viewer. Peace.
Yes to all!! They could have made Tommy more standoffish, could have had Eddie at the funeral instead. Or, if they had to do a breakup, have it be from Buck’s side. Because, out of the two (in 805) the love and adoration came mostly from Tommy. They did the whole thing just to be shitty.
76 notes
·
View notes
Note
I'm in love with your drawing of Wally and Howdy fighting over the arm. I love how mad Poppy is. Her saying "is2g" gave me the idea that she starts cussing more the longer she has to deal with this bs. And I'm also imagining Frank leaning against Eddie's hat saying "oh Eddie we're really in it now"
10 out of 10 artwork. Good job. No notes.
it has been Well Received it seems! i'm very pleased, i was hoping i wouldn't be the only one who found it funny ahaha
and i couldn't resist:
#if poppy knew swears she would probably end up using them yeah#but none of them know swears! if i scribble them swearing its for Comedic Effect!#because children's show puppets saying 'fuck' is peak humor imo#thinking very hard about the four of them and their experiences together#wh lights out au#scribble salad#rambles from the bog#god. one day i want to fuckin Write this au.#because i dont have it in me to plan out scribbles and draw 'comics' for it In Order#so yall are just getting bits and pieces from random parts#i do want to write it though#i need to know them i need to Know Them for that#their speech patterns their likes their dislikes their vernacular their voices their emotions their opinions and quirks#hopefully this desire to write for it persists through that point#i suppose i could... write a shitty rough draft#a very bland rough draft that would just be the basics...#that could make it easier for future me to edit and tweak and ReWrite#i am Considering....#hopefully i manage to write the Actual au and not just the aftermath which takes up 90% of the au's room in my head#but that is something i won't be talking about!#if the au gets written it'd be a Massive Spoiler! plus i'd probably write th aftermath as a companion sequel! maybe two!#for the different perspectives of course. or it would be a bonus fic where each chapter is a snapshot... hm thinking Thinking...
301 notes
·
View notes
Note
I keep seeing fanarts of ppl's OC's being on the ship, so do you think that if there was 6st crewmember (specifically, another woman) Anya would've been more safe? Like, someone to actually call Jimmy's begaviour out, someone Anya might wanna trust? Is there a possibility something might have changed (even if a little) or it would not have mattered at all?
-💀
I feel like the game would make it part of the commentary on where she would believe and help Anya but still be sort of dismissive? Like the whole “don’t waste time crying and being scared keep going and move on, don’t let him win”. It’s supposed to be positive and reinforcing but sometimes it does more damage in those times of mourning and grief, it feels patronizing, like you don’t understand what you’re going through but they do. Even if they did call out his behavior it’s still on Curly to act and while another voice would help, it’s still 4 against 2 on guys that don’t get it until they have to vs women who always have to.
I don’t mind mouthwashing OCs but I do get a bit bored as they tend to be borderline saviors or like Jimmy aligned. They are either more complicit than Curly or just Jimmy haters for no reason, outside of what the creators know about what he did to Anya. I am never irked by OCs but in a story like mouthwashing you really need to think about what your character adds to the commentary, especially if they are there during the crash. It’s nice to have like characters on Anya’s side more whole heartedly and interesting to see characters who placate Jimmy but sometimes it’s one note.
I can’t and don’t want to police peoples OCs it’s never my intention when I comment on trends I notice, but I do feel like the way people make their OCs interact with these two characters and especially Curly, really show a grave misunderstanding of the narrative and these characters as people vs roles in the story. Still, I know people just make up characters for fun and that’s fine. Great even, but I guys I’m focusing more on OCs that are supposed to have those serious dynamics. My favs tend to be pretty-Tulpar or post-Tulpar au OCs.
The inevitably of the crash is on Jimmy. He did that not because he wasn’t stopped but because all his means to kill Anya were taken. The gun, the axe. Even if Curly did strip him of his co-pilot privileges and try to keep him contained there’s only so many people. An extra body helps but they have jobs they have to do, he’s the only one steering the whole ship and Jimmy would likely have an out: food, bathroom, etc. He’s not new and if he couldn’t crash the ship directly, who’s to say he wouldn’t sabotage something else? A clunker like the Tulpar wouldn’t take much. An extra person helps but it’s just another thing that prolongs what a person like Jimmy is willing to do to shirk responsibility.
It’s more than just needing someone to stand up to him and think that’s what is missing when it comes to inserting a character into the mouthwashing setting.
#like again most people treat Jimmy like a misanthrope and he’s not and the way he’s just evil/rude to everyone all the time just isn’t real#like he’s snarky and rude but it can’t be 100% of the time like hes not going out his way to instigate#he’s the type to say shit and hope it stirs the pot like Daisuke likes him at first#thinks he’s a bit of a jerk but he likes him like unless you specifically make a character he’s dislike he’s not just gonna be#readily antagonistic to strangers or at the get go#not to mention it’s not just about Anya needing a friend but someone with the power to do something#a point in why she confides in Curly is he’s the captain she’s not just gonna tell the only other woman just because it’s still personal#not every girl tells their friend or another woman especially if they are new and they don’t know how they react not all girls are#girls girls some can be just as toxic as the men they are being confided in about#the nuance of the situation is not solved by having more people who actively hate jimmmy if anything it would make him escalate further as#clearly has issues with how people perceive him and being liked like another woman who hates him that’s gonna do something crazy in his mind#I think it’s interesting when OCs explore another side of the pre established dynamics as Jimmy uses each remaining crew member to fill a#something Curly provided for him and represent his dynamic with Anya and being an abuser I just feel like a lot is being missed out on#and it’s mainly cause people don’t want to make OCs that aren’t great people like it’s okay to have a grey mediocre OCs in situations like#this its realistic and helps you write more grounded characters like idk i like the ocs but eh im not like a super fan#I really should make an analysis on Jimmy cause people hate discussing him and his character is being really misunderstood#like not saying she’s innocent or an excuse but just not getting how he is supposed to work like he’s no dick fucking dasteredly#he’s a shitty guy who gets shittier like he ain’t start out an avengers level threat#mouthwashing#💀 anon#mouthwashing game#ask#anya mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing#mouthwashing oc#now I gotta make an oc just to prove myself but I can’t draw#so maybe not cuz what’s the point if I can’t explain the fly drip
33 notes
·
View notes
Note
do you ship helena bertinelli with anyone? if yes, then which characters and why? what's your favorite helena ship? do you have any helena rarepairs? (i know you've talked about helena/steph and you're so right about it, it's a very interesting ship)
!!!! i have so many ships for my best girl ever yes oh my god thank you for asking.
my top pairing is probably Vic Sage/the Question. Vic is the basic answer, but man. i love them so much. no couple has matched each other's freak like that have. Justice League Unlimited is a great adaptation of Helena in general, but it also did a great adaptation of Helena and Vic's relationship. how he just dedicates himself to helping her with no expected return, but also wants to make sure she doesn't go too far in a hunt for vengeance that never ends for her. i think a lot of characters often want to change Helena or expect things out of her for their own needs, like the Batfam and the BoP. but Vic is one of the few people who just wants her to be better for her own good. when he tries to stop her from killing it's not because of his morals, it's because he doesn't want this crusade to consume her. and i just. man i think about them a lot. Helena rlly likes weird little men who give themselves wholly to her.
Zinda Blake/Lady Blackhawk is also a top ship for me. tbh i just like Zinda. but i do love how Helena and Zinda interact, being the more rough and tumble members of the BoP. they're both outsiders, in different ways. Helena is an outsider of the Batfam and Zinda is literally from a different time and an outsider to the current world. their friendship is so genuine and i think if Babs and Dinah can have. whatever homoerotic nonsense going on during BoP, then Zinda and Helena deserve some homoerotic nonsense too. as a treat.
if we're willing to count New-52 Helena, then i enjoy Helena/Dick/Tiger. i think Helena and Dick being a past relationship is really important in pre-Flashpoint for Helena's development, though i don't ship them as a serious couple beyond a fling. but in the New-52, i think this throuple be fun. Helena and Tiger respect each other as two very driven, no-nonsense agents and then well. they both clearly have some kind of thing for Dick. so it's fun finding the balance of how they could all work together romantically.
and ofc. it's a crime to mention Helena ships and not mention Renee Montoya/the Question. every time they interact it's really fucking gay. it's so gay that Kate Kane, Renee's own ex, assumed Helena and Renee were gay. i cannot be convinced against this ship. i genuinely think this ship should be canon. i mean. DC did tease us with this moment from an alternate universe and it's lived rent for me since. fucking criminal for us to only get one panel of what we could have if DC let Helena be a fruit in the main universe. being in love with Helena Bertinelli should be a right of passage for the Question mantle, i personally believe. if you asked me like. genuinely who i want to see Helena date in the current comics, Renee is my top pick. (i would say Vic but he's fucking dead and the New-52 butchered him so rip my mans-)
lois lane (2019) #10
besides those ships, just about every ship for Helena probably falls into the category of rarepair. like you said i've talked about my love for Helena/Steph before bc god. i think it should be a thing more people ship. once i finish the fic i'm writing about them i will convince others to like it.
i also think Helena/Cass could be fun. in a *lot* of ways Helena and Cass are narrative parallels to each other. Helena was a victim of her family being murdered at about the same age Cass was forced to be a murderer. Helena grows up to believe in lethal justice because of this, and Cass grows up to be staunchly against it. Cass' Batgirl suit was made *by* Helena. they both want to be protectors of the most vulnerable people. they balance each other out in a lot of ways and i think they should kiss about it.
also probably a rarepair, i think Helena/Lady Shiva is fun. their fight during Birds of Prey (2010) had... questionable moments for Helena's characterization, but i do love so much that Helena knocks Shiva off her feet and gains a deep respect from Shiva. like. Shiva gives her a nickname and shows her admiration. i would like to see fanfic where Shiva continues to be weirdly admirable of Helena and bothering her non-stop. they could be a fun fucked up toxic yuri moment. this is just. so gay to me.
birds of prey (2010) #6
my most rare Helena pair would probably be Helena Wayne, actually. but specifically Helena Wayne of JSA (2022). ever since, for some reason, it was made canon that the current Helena Wayne was named after Helena Bertinelli and took the name Huntress to honor her i *cannot* stop thinking about them meeting. because in-universe it makes *no* fucking sense for Bruce to name his kid after *Helena Bertinelli*, someone he's regularly at odds with and doesn't like. it's clearly an awkward explanation to try to make the whole two Huntress situation make sense. (it's almost as bad as Helena Wayne in the New-52 using Helena Bertinelli as an alias.) but because it's such an odd choice, i do think it could be fun for Helena Wayne, when she's back in time to see Bruce, to find Helena Bertinelli to get to know the woman she was named after and Helena Bertinelli just being. baffled by the idea of *Batman* naming his kid after her. it could be a fun fucked up moment.
my other super rarepair is Kara Zor-L/Power Girl. they had like. one meaningful interaction of JSA Classified and it's been PLAGUING me. something about when Power Girl doesn't remember her past and she's seeking a friend, she instinctively goes to find Huntress? but it's wrong bc this isn't *her* Huntress and neither of them understand why Power Girl would seek Helena out? god it's so good. i'm always a big fan of ships where one person in the ship is *so* obviously using the other person as a replacement for someone they lost and they both know it. it's such a doomed angsty thing where you could play with Helena actually really liking Kara, but knowing that she's just a replacement for Kara's Helena Wayne. good fucked up shit man.
and lastly: i really ship her with Dawn Granger/Dove. there's no canon basis for this, they didn't have a ton of interactions even when they were both on the BoP. but there's a very kind innocence to Dawn that contrasts Helena's violence really well. and i do love a ship with a corruption kink vibe to it. let Helena corrupt Dawn. i could write such fucked up porn about these two.
#necrotic answerings#helena bertinelli#idk the ship names for most of these ships so idk how to tag them#most of them are too rare to have ship names. tragic.#anyway i ship her with so many ppl#i do ship her with tim as well but i didn't mention him just bc i default to viewing them platonically.#also think babs is a valid ship for her. but in a hatefucking way.#i prefer their relationship when they can't stand each other it's more fun.#but yeah the realistic “i want to see this in canon” options are vic and renee#and then the rest are “i'm alone in this ship but i see potential” rarepairs#esp lady shiva. like i'm *really* tempted to write that fic.#i just need to read more comics with shiva.#actually the most fucked up option: cass/helena/shiva incestual threesome.#that has potential. but i don't think anyone shares my vision#also i've seen posts arguing for helena/jason#and while. longterm i disagree. i do think them sleeping together is on the table.#but largely ppl always bringing him up when talking about her sours me to that ship. so eh.#also i would ship helena/bruce in a fucked up way if that one batman: the brave & the bold episode didn't piss me off so bad#justice league unlimited is the *only* good adaptation of helena i'm so serious.#everything else eats ass with her. esp the arrowverse.#and the birds of prey movie.#but jlu does good by her and if you just watch that show you do have a solid grasp of her character#it adapts her story into a child-friendly medium in what i think is the best way it could've#anywhore thank you for this ask <3#you actually sent this when something rlly shitty happened so it was a nice little distraction from life to think about my answer#OH WAIT YOU KNOW WHO I FORGOT.#kate spencer. manhunter. I ship her with helena too.#lethal female vigilantes unite.#BRO those two deserve a teamup mini or something. they'd click so well.#dc hire me to write a huntress/manhunter mini series i promise i won't make them gay (my fingers are crossed)
10 notes
·
View notes
Note
If youre ok w sharing then i would love to hear your thoughts on lotor........ Hes such a weird guy. Dissecting him like a frog
If i get hate for this, i am blaming you/j but in all honesty i apologize if this kinda messy, as i have said it has beem awhile since i saw any of the episodes about him. Most of it is my personal interpretation and opinions of his character-
First of all i personally hate both "L0tor is evil rapist imperialist who did not have a single redeemable quality" and "L0tor is uwu poor baby who did nothing wrong", because yeah he had good intentions and he seemed to genuinely love Alura and care for Alteans but also he very much did do a lot of things Wrong. I am pretty sure a lot of his actions fall into category of Very Wrong
Lot0r to me is an absolute control freak, he has to be 10 steps ahead of everyone, he needs to be control of the situation no matter what. Whether it be through a silver tongue or by his blade (see N@rti's death, him vs White Lion). This is as much as a ruthless strategy as it is a trauma response. Being raised under Z@rkon, a father who only saw him as inferior half-bred, he had to learn survivor tactics. He will do anything to survive whether it be beg, lie, manipulate, and kill. He is a survivor of some genuinely godawful abuse he suffered for 10,000 years, combined with racism he suffered for being half altean
However this need to be in control extends to his allies and people he cares about. I am sure Lotor may have loved Alura, it doesnt change the fact that he very much abused her trust. Their entire relationship was based on a lie. He knew Alteans were still alive and not only did he not tell Alura about it he leaned into the "last survivors of Altea" for their relationship, which is why it was doomed since the beginning. And if it had not been this, then it would have been something else. Cause lying and manipulation are very much core of his character, that is how we are introduced to him
Like i see people going "Oh Lot0r could have been good if he had therapy and a hug", and i am not really not sure about it, cause like would he? Would he choose to be vulnerable and actually let his feelings out and be truthful in a an unbiased reliable way that will neither serve him in any way nor make him look better nor is a part of some machivilian scheme he cooked up because he doesnt trust the therapist he is paying? No
And thing is he does desire connection. He looks for connection in people who are similar to him. Half galran, altean survivors, Alura these are the people who he chose to get close to. He looks for similarities, people he can relate to, people who he sees as like him, people who he thinks can give him a sense of belonging. He is deeply lonely. However his desperation for control, absolute mistrust in anyone and everyone, and his inability to be actually honest dooms any relationship he'll ever have
Also this is probably just me, but for someone who is this morally complex character he has tendency to see things in black and white? Like it is His dad and empire= bad, alteans=good. He idolizes Altea to the point of seeing it as an Utopia, and this ideal was more important to him than any Alteans who are alive and with him. I also cant remember him ever caring about someone outside of the Dichotomy. Like at most i remember is after he became the emperor Lance pointing out how other planets need to be freed and he just brushed it off
Overall he gives me the "smart people dont always make good decisions, but they are good at justifying their bad ones" vibes. We dont know exactly why he decided to use alteans as batteries but i am choosing to go with my interpretation- "Lottor saw something fucked up in that future showing space whale thingy, decided the only way to solve was altean batteries except in true self fulfilling prophecy greek tragedy way it only made things worse and started a series of event that will cause the thing he saw causing real trouble a few years after his death.
Another thing! I think it should have been him being the focus of Evil Altean episode instead of A//ura. I hate that episode and everything it stands for but like if there Had to be an evil alteans episode then it should be around someone who is you know? Obsessed with Altean culture? Is big on control and manipulation? Is more geared towards big picture and "greater good" over individual? Is worried about turning into just like his galran father and so desperately wants to connect to his idealized version of his altean mother? Yeah
#empty answers#This is the type of shit that used to get you sniped from both sides of the shitty discourse back in ye old days#I probably have more thoughts but i also need to rewatch vld to have a clearer picture#Also i dont get when people say it was bad writing that he turned out traitor#Like it was handled in abhorent way but also- we are literally introduced to him manipulating an entire audience#The fuck yall mean yall thought he was genuine??#I used to like him but come on man#That was the most obvious disney twist villain if i have ever seen one#and vld writers are not smart enough to do something actually subversive#Also gonna be real with you while i do have a lot of thoughts of him i kinda also dont enjoy his character??#It is-how do i put it? A bit lame#Like the eps were going on about how he is this Most Complex Character and instead we have is-#a disney twist villain and sad anime backstory that is supposed to absolve him or something#I can think of so many villains/character that had similar aspects to him but were just Way Better#A convincingly manipulative man with black and white morality who thinks he is in the right even though his actions beg to differ?#B3los is right there#Villain who uses manipulation as a defense mechanism which only drive all their friends away? Grace monr0e and Sash Waybrigt#A tragedy who just wanted peace for his people only for things to spiral so horribly they destroyed the very people they sought to protect?#M0rdred pendrag0n hnoc my beloved <33#A hot villain who is morally reprehensible but is really hot? M3dusa G0rgon <3#And just. I think the problem is the writers wanted him to be all of those things and he ends up being none of them#Not to mention the plot armour. You mean to tell me he is being this obvious and yet no one suspected anything??#Yeah right. Detective!Hunk for the win!#Anyway sorry this is late and so rambly#Thanks for the ask!!!!#Anyone else reading this. This is just a personal opinion ok? No fights ok??
16 notes
·
View notes
Text
oh waaaaah jjk sucks because my fave died!! okay then go back to children’s shows or something where no one ever dies at all.
since the beginning of the series it was established that being a sorcerer was incredibly dangerous and ended with most sorcerers having short lives. it’s one of the first things discussed by the characters.
it’s a dark series and that means people will die. “people dying = bad and predictable writing!!!” it’s a fantasy series and you aren’t the one fucking writing it. it’s not even complete and you don’t actually even know who’s dead or not or who will actually stay dead. they haven’t even fully revealed what yuuji’s team’s plan is yet.
like…if you don’t like that then take your ass back to bnha or grow tf up.
#jjk spoilers#jjk#gojo satoru#literally mean it mostly about him#i like him but he’s the strongest. there’s not much to build on for his character at all#either he actually wasn’t but needed to believe that he was#or he’s not actually dead yet#‘oh it got so shitty and bad after the shibuya arc’#then stop reading it.#they established from the BEGINNING that people are going to die#if their deaths seem sudden and surprising then that’s GOOD WRITING#plots shouldn’t be predictable all the time#it’s like just because you don’t like something means it’s inherently bad#you guys have got to respect that media is meant to be diverse and that is does not have to be happy or make you happy in order to be good#please stop hating fr you guys already fucking ruined bnha bc of it#bnha spoilers#kind of#that’s a series i put down and walked away from because it’s pretty obvious the author wanted to kill off bakugou#but him being a ‘fan favorite’ prevented that choice#as a result the story is a mess and the plot had potential but now it’s just gonna fall flat
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
The vibe really deteriorated as the day went on, and now I'm sitting in bed, awake, feeling like garbage
#it was an okay weekend but i was jittery and numb for most of it#tried to write christmas cards for the first time in 2 years. cried while doing so and then had to lie down after i did 5#i got frustrated with the story i'm writing and considered dropping it or deleting the whole thing#spent friday alone pretty much all day which normally i'm fine with but for whatever reason made the loneliness really hit hard this time#spent all thanksgiving day waiting for a familial confrontation#got asked by my 6 year old nephew how old i was and then he followed up with 'well why arent you married what are you doing'#which i'm pretty sure is something he heard in a conversation someone else was having and he repeated it bc he's 6 fucking years old#which btw i don't hold against him or am mad at him about bc he's an innocent kid#but that made me feel really shitty#spent an hour today panicking about this dog virus#and in between all of that i was self diagnosing myself with mental illnesses#which made me feel awful bc it made gaslight myself in thinking maybe i wanted one?#which is so fucked up to the max and i'm so sorry for even putting that here#but i put this all here bc i could never have this conversation with people irl#they'd get too worried or they'd think i'm overreacting or i need to date or need to do something with myself besides read#i'm so sorry everyone#i'll try to be better#i just had to put this out somewhere#and i didn't put this in a journal bc my last entry sounds so teenagerish out of context i don't even want to look at it#anyway i have to try to sleep i have to go into the office early tomorrow#i'm sorry guys#i really am😔
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
I HAVE FIVE PAGES. LEFT. TO DRAW.
#i don't want to jinx it AGAIN but tomorrow........ i might have adhd meds#should the fucking stars align#vacillating wildly between#okay tangent but that “draft saved!” thingy that shows up ON TOP OF THE TAGS I AM CURRENTLY TYPING#DO YOU FUCKING MIND#anyway#vacillating wildly betweennn#there's no way you really have adhd you're using other peoples' struggles to justify being a shitty person#and okay time to draw i just need to look up every person i remember from elementary school on facebook#oh yeah name redacted has a beard that suits him so time to draw oh and name redacted IS cool even tho my shitty brother said he was like#a huuuuuge stoner well i didn't believe him anyway#time to draw i just need to find out if mika is on tour and if he's coming to canada and read his entire wikipedia page and time to draw#i just need to listen to his new song but the song youtube is playing next is not the vibe but i DO need to see a giant spruce beetle#not a cool giant beetle the kind that make a clicking noise and pinch you and strike a visceral fear into my heart#and i need to rewrite this later scene because i was thinking about it and thought of something better#and time to draw but first i need to write this tumblr post#this is because netflix doesn't have himym on there anymore#the concept of talking about himym ends all rambling bc i could talk about it for so long i don't even know where to start#thanks for coming to my ted talk
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
sorry idk i just think that if you complain abt your partner being the only person who cares about you but then block out every single one of your friends after you grow tired of them then maybe you have some self growth to do
#not to vague post but like. come on lmao#youre not a magnet for shitty ppl man maybe youre just a shitty person#and like admittedly i dont think this person was but come on if you dont have anyone consistent in your life bc YOU shut all of them out#youre doing something wrong. sorry.#ok thats my only ventpost this month. i feel like i have a right to pettiness for not vagueposting three months ago#the overdue asteroid strikes again#i hope the person this is abt sees this lmao <3 i also hope youre doing better and youve gotten over yourself#frankly i didnt need to see anime characters nor your petty complaints over how bad your life is but i did! i put up it with it bc i though#we were friends! but at the same time if you want ppl to care about you youre sure as fuck making it hard to 😭😭 hows anyone gonna care abt#you if you block them once youre tired of them or if they do one thing that offends you#if youre looking for perfect friends then like dont. the point of having friends is loving them. despite despite despite.#hypocritical as fuck lmfao. i thought huh maybe i should block you after you told me you were so jealous of me you couldnt read my writing#you make it so fucking hard for anyone to care about you and im sure you know that bc its all you post about#well. i cared about you. youre fucking awful and i shouldnt have though
6 notes
·
View notes
Note
i do not know if i ever sent this to you. i have posted it. i hope you like it Princess.
#uhhhhhm no you HAVE NOT SENT THIS TO ME BEFORE?!?!#I literally am speechless#I’m not super talky right now#but even if I was I feel like I’d still be fucking speechless#like I already said I love your writing 🩷#and it fucking BLOWS ME AWAY when people write about me or use me as an inspiration#like????????? what??????? me???????????!#I’m going to keep this close to my heart and look at it whenever I’m feeling down#I don’t remember if I said that already but it’s true#I need to get a journal or a cute box to put things like this in so I can just grab it and look through them when I’m feeling shitty#one thing I needed to say is the fact that you shared this with me now of all times??? is kinda crazy to me#idk if it’s a coincidence or if the universe/God/whoever/whatever is trying to tell me to go back into music and singing#not going to go into it too much but I’ve been looking at my life a lot lately#and I’m realizing I’m not getting any younger…. I know I’m still young but if I don’t do something soon -#my life is going to completely pass before my eyes and I really really don’t want that#I’m *finally* going to get mental help soon (long story but I have to wait a few weeks)#and once I’m actually mentally stable I can focus on what I want to do with my life#so I’ve been thinking a lot about my performing arts background and then randomly a get an email from a choir director I know#asking if I could please join the choir for their Easter performance cause they could really use my high notes#and she just kept complimenting me and it felt really nice ☺️#then when I went to the first rehearsal I sat next to this girl and we were singing a part and the first sopranos go up to a high A#and I can hit it easily but most of them couldn’t so it felt like I was going this mini solo lol#but she asks me what my range is and I told her that back when I trained I could sing queen of the night which I think goes up to an F6#and she was talking about how impressive that is#and it made me think about if I actually trained and got back into it how good I actually could get#I don’t mean this to be like ‘look at me look at me I’m so good’#it just feels nice to have a little bit of a direction again#who knows if I’ll actually go down the music path again but it does sound damn exciting#I miss it with all my heart - I miss singing and performing and acting… I even miss music theory#anyway rant over and i ran out of space but thank you so much I seriously can’t thank you enough 😭🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
No matter how much Man-Bat may like you, he's still very much a wild animal at heart and capable of turning on even his best friend should they stand between him and food or worse, between him and Francine. She is the only person he refuses to harm under any circumstance, making it wise to tread carefully whenever his ex-wife is involved.
#🦇 || musings#🦇 || headcanons#Disappointed myself again with a lack of writing#I did a little but not all I wanted#Got roped into chores then just felt bummed out bc shitty weather#Well at least some got done and muse is going strong#In all seriousness Man-Bat is fucking DANGEROUS#He could be grooming you one minute and if you do something he does not like he might bare his fangs at you#And he can't tell you not to do the thing#Just running on animal impulses#Luckily it's pretty easy to read his body language and he usually gives warnings before he strikes#Usually#Stuff like flattened ears and puffy fur while staring hard#Also spread wings#All the unfriendly signs#Definitely do NOT hurt or attempt to hurt Francine HE WILL COME FOR YOU SO BADLY#I need to write Francine but I'm so bad already goshhh#Man-Bats are generally very protective towards their own okay???#If he sees you as part of his 'colony' you'll be protected too#Unless you piss him off lol
18 notes
·
View notes
Text
According to 6 different serious health/psychology pages I have BPD, do you think that means I should see a therapist?
#i've been thinking about the possibility for a while but never looked up symptoms because i was scared#and now it's starting to get out of hand so i finally did even though i originally didn't want to be officially diagnosed#for various reasons like the stigma in society and my health insurance knowing so all my future doctors will go back to their#'it's only psychological stop being so dramatic you're not actually sick' shit and invalidating me and my health problems in the past#some of them straight up refused to write a sick note for school when i actually had the flu back in 8th grade#so that's one reason why i don't want any mental illnesses to appear in my medical record#plus the cost factor because i'm not sure if the insurance would even cover everything but i might end up paying for it myself#if it means the health insurance won't be informed even if it's probably a lot of money#but in order to get therapy i need to get diagnosed by a professional so once i read into it a bit more i'll figure out how to tell my mom#and see if i'll call this one therapist in my town who apparently treats psychosomatic disorders#i'm sincerely sorry to everybody i've talked to recently (aside from casual fandom chatting) who may have noticed me behaving kinda shitty#advice is greatly appreciated because this hit me like a train and i don't fucking want this. like at all#i thought my switching between depressed and anxious and angry and empty and hyper was just. idk something else but not That#mel talks
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
im gonna say something so controversial but so brave. seeing one of the last Joe love songs repurposed for That Man makes me feel so gross and icky and it gives me the heebie jeebies and this isn't to say that I miss Joe but even now I still like him more than I like Travis. my distain for Travis is so strong that I simply cannot let some of these songs get reassigned to him.
#i don't even like labyrinth very much#like sorry all Taylor and everyone else may be ready to move on but i simply am not#not with that wretched beast#i love taylor. i had an extremely upsetting day because i love taylor. somehow my hatred for travis is even larger right now tho.#and I'm not trying to put taylor in the basement or whatever the hell im not trying to write some kind of narrative about her life#it comes down to: i hate football. i hate travis. i hate how fucking overexposed this relationship is.#do i need to take a break? god yes#but i try to take a break from here in other communities and it ends in me wanting to kms because someone said something shitty about taylor#I'm so stuck between a rock and a hard place i really just need a couple weeks without internet period#anyone wanna send me and my bestie on a cruise?
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
merlin spoilers so look away if for some reason you haven’t watched it yet but
I had never seen it until this november and i know i’m literally the last person in the world to hop on this long-departed train but i finally finished it today and I’m Sorry why did no one tell me the finale is literally fucking brokeback mountain why did they make this what were they thinking i don’t understand any of this what was the reason why did they ignore arthurian legend in order to make merlin a twink WHY DID THEY DO THAT???? what was their goal? why is the literal plot of this show that merlin was so sickeningly devoted to arthur that he’d rather save him than EVERY SINGLE MAGICAL PERSON IN CAMELOT??? AND WHY WAS HIS DESTINY TO PROTECT ARTHUR SO THAT HE’LL MAKE MAGIC LEGAL BUT THEN HE ENDS UP DYING BEFORE HE CAN EVEN DO THAT??? SO WAS MERLIN’S DESTINY PURELY TO BE IN GAY LOVE WITH ARTHUR????????? WHY DID THEY MAKE THIS
AND ANOTHER THING is this secret neoliberal propaganda because if the point is that they have to wait for LITERAL CENTURIES for arthur to return, then that means that morgana was fully right to have a revolution awpeofijawefpoawiejfwaepfoiawef also why on earth didn’t gwen make magic legal??????? idk maybe it’s incredible satire that just went over my head
why did they make this????1111!???
loved it tho i’ll probs rewatch
#merlin#merlin spoilers#i'm sorry that i'm fretting over this goddamn show in 2022#i know everyone is over it but#oh my god#why do i keep watching shows that will disturb me in profound ways#merlin is literally bury your gays#anyway gwen deserved better writing#i think she should be allowed to make evil choices without being mind-controlled but that's just me#and morgana should've got a redemption arc#but arthur gwen and merlin are all dating each other right like are we all in agreement?#is anyone out there listening#does anyone still care about this LMAO#just. i knew it was a controversial finale#but i swear to god i somehow didn't see this coming despite the fact that it was prophecy#ugh whatever maybe there's something profound there but i choose to ignore it <3#also merlin saved the fucking dragon which made mordred his sword#ok also it sounds like morgana had a really shitty time trapped in a well and we never really talked about that#i need to sleep i am so sorry#hey at least gaius lived <3
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
it feels like im reading against the intended tone of the relationship and character but god. if you take dana’s actions purely at face value the kind of person it paints is like. One I have a lot of complicated feelings about.
#like dont get me wrong miguel needs his ass kicked several ways to sunday for the cheating#but man. is there something to be read in someone who#finds a scaple and digs DEEP when she wants to hurt someone. like hanging out with Stone - KNOWING he drugged miguel - because she wants to#needle him about not spending time with her. kissing gabriel while saying not to let the past affect his relationship w his brother now#LIKE. on one hand i can just chalk this up to shitty misogynistic 90s writing and theres absolutely an element to that#but on the other hand im like how do you fuck up interiority on this woman specifically SO hard if youre not going to interogate the actions#she takes or offer an insight into how this character thinks or considers others around her#when other women in this series like Xina and Conchata have really interesting and compelling dynamics and actions that you can dig at from#several difffent angles like#THROWING MY HANDS IN THE AIR! GOD! I want the writing to give a shit about how it constructs Dana and what that implies about the kind of#person she is#tunes talks critical#<- since there’s an element of me bitching shdhd#tunes talks 2099#and like. I don’t need Dana to be a ‘good’ person! I want her to be a person that I can interpret the mindset of! and understand the way shw#views other people and herself and it just doesn’t feel like the writing gives her that grace
3 notes
·
View notes