#this is slightly faster than the video version

[shayla567]

gif version

[scatterpatter]

HEY YOU SHOULD WATCH THE BRAVE LITTLE TOASTER

Oh nooooo if only there were an easy way to find it tho... if only... oh man... if only- oh oops sorry I tripped-

Oh man if only it were easy to watch... oh man...................

[pantherxrogers]

hey! could you write a san version of the sugar daddy/boyfriend smut👀

one-shot: sugar daddy!san x fem!reader ⋆。°  ✮   ⁺

⭐️ pairing: sugar daddy!san (+ boxer!san) x fem!reader

⭐️ warnings: smut (18+ only), explicit language, oral (f receiving), dry humping, swearing, gentle dom!san, slightly sub!reader, crybaby!reader (but they're happy tears), incorrect boxing terminology (boxer!san is just sexy lmao i know nothing about boxing), pet names galore, spit as lube, super fluffy too

also...pee after sex!!

⭐️ summary: sugar daddy!san comes home from Europe with a special gift for his spoiled girl. she's a little bit of a crybaby, but he knows how to remedy that. he may be a boxing world champion but he's devoted on making the reader feel like the winner 😼

⭐️ a/n: lmao, i got carried away writing this one because San is my bias. it's definitely longer than Mingi and Yunho, so i'm calling it a one-shot.

i re-watched the bouncy music video recently, so i had the idea to combine sugar daddy!san with Boxer!san. and also non!idol san. it's a trope salad LMAO. enjoy! 🫶🏾 thank you for the request darling! <3

my masterlist (you can find the mingi and yunho versions here!)

This is a work of fiction and is not meant to represent real events or the actual personalities of any K-pop idols mentioned. All characters and situations are purely imaginary. This story is created for entertainment purposes only, and no harm or disrespect is intended toward the idols or their fans. Enjoy!

"Good job, baby!" You squeal, rushing towards San as soon as he steps into your shared penthouse.

"Thank you, pretty girl," your boyfriend mumbles, weighed down by jet lag, but already feeling lighter in your presence.

"So proud of my undisputed champion! I wish I could've been there," you coo, basking in the feel of him.

"Me too, baby," he confesses, finally content in your arms. It's always nice to win, but nothing beats his greatest treasure. You.

Standing on your tippy toes, you press a firm kiss to his lips. He meets you with a hunger. San traces his tongue along your plump bottom lip, asking for entry. When he delves into your mouth, you can't help the little moan that slips out. The sound makes San's pants feel tighter.

Your heart's beating faster now, and you melt into your boyfriend's warmth. The thin, silky nightie barely covers anything. A warm chill goes down your spine when your nipples brush against San's firm chest. As you lift your leg to drape around his waist, you notice his arms are locked behind his back.

"Ummm…" you trail off, breaking the kiss to ask for an explanation. This is your first moment to really get a good look at him, which doesn't help the wetness gathering in your thong.

He's smirking at you, and he's just so sexy. The chandelier lighting of the foyer reflects from his thin, gold chain. You notice that he's dressed comfortably, likely still wearing whatever he wore on the private jet to get home.

He's wearing his own merch, Choi San (K-Rocky) World Champion printed across the front of the gray hoodie. It makes you beam with pride every time you see it. Trailing your eyes down, you're met with his matching sweatpants and growing bulge. More pride surges in your chest, happy to know he missed you as much as you missed him. As a result, a girlish giggle slips through your lips.

"Something funny, pretty girl?" he chides, playfully raising an eyebrow at you.

"Is there something in your pocket or are you just excited to see me?" you grin, loving the ways his eyes light up at your cheesy joke. He crowds your space again, smiling down at you before he whispers in your ear.

"Well, I'm definitely excited to see my baby, but I also have a little surprise for her," he grumbles, sending warmth to your lower belly. He steps back again, arms still locked behind his back.

You're fighting back a smile, remembering the promise he made before leaving to reclaim his title.

"Close your eyes, sweet girl," he murmurs. You can't see him, but he smirks again, cock stirring in his pants at your obedience.

"Are you ready?" he teases, chuckling softly at the furrow in your brow. He can't ignore how cute you get when you're feeling bratty.

"Sannieeeee, c'mon," you whine, growing more impatient by the second.

He feels like a pervert the way his eyes lock on your full breasts, biting his lip when they sway in tandem with your little tantrum. He thinks about how they'll feel in his mouth when he gets you underneath him.

"Stop staring at my tits and let me have my gift!" you growl, knowing how spoiled you sound but you've lost the ability to care.

"Hey, be a good girl," he commands, the serious tone in his voice putting an abrupt stop to your antics.

" 'm sorry, sir," you whisper breathily, clit throbbing at the way he effortlessly switches into his dominant side.

San heart aches a little bit when he looks at you. He knows you love playing rough, but he doesn't have it in him to torment you any longer.

" 's okay baby, open your eyes for me," he coos. He nearly jumps back at the shriek you let out.

"Ah! I knew it!" you cry out, reaching forward to snatch the Hermes bag out of his hands. Reaching inside, you almost burst into tears when you feel the handbag of your dreams.

"Sannie," you whimper, looking up at him with teary eyes. He's on you before you can continue, wrapping his strong arms around you.

"Don't cry, baby," he begs softly, unable to watch you cry, even if they're happy tears.

"I can't help it," you sniffle, "I'm so grateful for you," the words are muffled against his chest, you find it hard to continue opening the bag.

"I couldn't do any of this without my baby. This is the least I could do," he answers honestly, pulling your soft body away from his to look into your eyes.

"I love you more than anything." You tear up again at the sincerity in his eyes.

"I love you too," you whimper, trying to stop the tears that flow down your cheeks. San's hands come up, brushing away the tears as lightly as possible, so you don't feel his rough callouses.

He holds you for a few more minutes, quieting your tears with affirmations and soft kisses. You stand there in silence for a while, calmed by the steady sound of his heartbeat.

"How do you feel now, baby? he asks softly, tracing his hand down your back. Another smirk rests on his face, when he watches the goosebumps raise up on your skin.

"Think 'm good now," you answer him, remembering the task at hand.

You finally open the bag, admiring the heavy Birkin in your hands. As you pour out a stream of thank you's and I love you's, when San catches you by surprise.

One moment, you're standing in the foyer and the next moment, he's scooped you up and into the living room. He gently places you on the vast leather couch, settling in beside you.

Drawn to his warmth, you cuddle up next to him, loving the way his strong arm cradles your waist. He carefully takes the bag from you, placing it on the marble coffee table. The two of you sit in a comfortable silence before the TV catches his attention.

"Are you watching my highlights, baby?" he teases, knowing full and well that you always tune into ESPN when he's away.

"Don't tease me, Sannie. I missed you," you mumble, nestling further into his side.

San looks down at you, enchanted by the exposed skin that the nightie doesn't quite cover. He brings a rough hand to your thigh, tracing the smooth skin, admiring how it feels in his grip. He can hear your breathing pick up, knowing exactly what effect he has on you.

"Missed you too, pretty girl," he sighs, using one arm to shift you onto his lap. San helps you adjust, finally content when you're straddling him.

"I missed you more," you breathe out, finding it difficult to concentrate.

He's so warm and strong beneath you, his muscular thighs being the perfect pillow. His hands are lower now, softly groping your ass through the lingerie. You can't help but to grind down on him, both of you letting out a content moan.

"Not possible," he murmurs, "But you're welcome to try to prove it," he finishes his sentence with a sharp smack to your ass, triggering another moan from you.

"Shit," you huff out, overwhelmed by the feeling of his body underneath yours.

His cock is fully hard now, protruding through his sweats. Your thong is basically nonexistent, clinging to your wet pussy. That sensation combined with San's lazy grinding make it hard for you to think clearly.

His lips are on your neck now, sucking on the sensitive skin. He loves the way you moan out into his ear, harshly grinding his hard cock against your pussy.

"C'mon baby, you gonna prove it to me?" he teases, warm breath against your ear.

His words finally click in your head, knowing what you want to do. You start to shimmy off his lap, trying to get on your knees, but San's arms lock you in place.

"Wanna show you how grateful I am," you beg, hooded eyes staring back into his own.

His head lulls back onto the cushion, finding it hard to concentrate when you look at him like that. Messy curls, hard nipples poking through your nightie, and your lips swollen from kissing. You look fucked out and he's barely getting started.

"Then let me taste you, baby. That's all I really want," he groans, quickly switching your position. Your head spins for a moment, barely registering how you changed places so fast.

You're on your back, San's rough hands pinning your thighs to your chest. The leather couch is cool beneath your skin, helping you think a little more clearly. Raising up on your elbows, you look down at him, eyes almost rolling back at the image.

He's bent over in front of you, gray hoodie long forgotten. He's wearing a white tank, muscles on display for you. As you admire him, his smooth lips trail along the sensitive skin of your inner thighs. Always the tease, he softly kisses your clit through your thong, your hips bucking in response.

"S-Sannie, please," you moan out, trying to push up against his mouth. He pulls back, smirking up at you, loving the neediness in your voice.

"Tell me what you want, pretty girl," he murmurs, faintly tracing his fingertips up and down your plush thighs. He looks at you expectantly.

"Want your mouth," you whine, hating when he does this. It makes you feel shy, but maybe that's why your heart flutters a little bit. Even if you'd never admit it to him.

"Want me to lick your pretty pussy?" he coos before lowering his head, pressing another kiss to your bundle of nerves.

"Mmmm, yes" you moan, eyes rolling back at the light pressure.

"Such a good girl. What my baby wants, my baby gets," he growls, peeling the soaked fabric away from your pussy.

"Fuck," he groans, eyes locked on the trail of wetness still clinging to your thong. He can't help dipping his tongue in it, eager to have a taste. You yelp, surprised by the sudden contact.

"Y-yes, Sannie, feels so good," you pant, unable to focus on anything but the intense pleasure from San's tongue.

He alternates between sucking on your clit and bringing up a finger to rub figures eights. Your hips buck up, doing anything to maximize your pleasure.

"You like that, baby? Like how it feels against your little clit?" The look of pure ecstasy on your face gives him his answer.

He latches back onto your pussy, using his thick tongue to delve between your sopping folds. Your high-pitched moans spur him on, sliding his tongue into your tight hole.

The lewd noises of your boyfriend tongue fucking you is too much for you to bear, your pussy starts to clench around the wet muscle, teetering on the edge of your orgasm.

"F-fuck, yes sir," you huff, spreading your legs even wider, "Gonna cum soon."

He hums against you, the vibrations adding to your pleasure. He's back on your clit again, flicking the nub with the tip of his tongue. When you thrash against the couch, San tightens his grip on your thighs, trapping you into place.

"You can come for me, sweet girl. It's okay," he soothes you, switching back to rubbing fast circles against your clit.

Your hips have lost their rhythm now, aimlessly bucking into the pleasure of San's thumb. He lowers his head again, lewdly spitting on your pussy.

"C'mon on my tongue, baby. That's it," he hums, gravelly voice going directly to your clit.

"Ahhh, fuck," you whine out, feeling his tongue enter your hole again. The pleasure is too much. His rough thumb against your clit and tongue stretching out your pussy push you over the edge. Your orgasm crashes over you in waves, San coaxing you through it.

He sits back on his heels, taking in your body. He keeps circling your clit, letting you ride out your high and come back down to him.

When you've calmed down, you see your boyfriend hovering over you. That kind smile is on his face now, stretching all the way up to his eyes. You swear you can feel your heart expanding in your chest.

"Hi, my pretty girl."

"Hi Sannie," you whisper shyly, cheeks burning at the way he admires you.

"C'mere," he snuggles you back into his lap, adjusting your nightie and smoothing down your curls. You giggle at the wet kisses he's pressing to your cheeks, loving the way he cares for you.

"Missed my baby so much," he accentuates his words with a tight squeeze, making your heart do the same. You let out a soft missed you too, feeling sleepy in his arms.

Cradling your body, you feel him rise from the couch. He turns off the TV, but alarm bells ring in the back of your head.

"Sannie."

"Hm?"

"Can you take my Birkin to my wardrobe please?" you mumble. San tries his best to hold in his laugh, so he doesn't disturb you. Not even a mind-shattering orgasm could make you forget about your Birkin.

"Of course, baby," Is the last thing you here before your eyes close for the night.

[inmyheaddd]

just feeling my way back to you - grayson hawthorne x reader

a/n: this was supposed to be a flashback in a grayson series i’m working on but idk if im ever gonna post it 💔 summary: having what was supposed to be a relaxing picnic by the river, took a very unexpected turn when it started raining. heavily. warnings: rain kiss rain kiss rain kiss!! nothing really tho wc: 1.6k masterlist

you and grayson sat by a creek-river hybrid, the sun painting a golden hue over everything as the water beneath you seemed to glitter. 

there wasn’t much noise, apart from the rustling of leaves, the sound of the water, and of course, you and grayson’s non stop quiet chatter and laughter.

the air sent a breeze down your spine, but it did nothing to bother you. you don’t think anything could ever ruin this moment with you and grayson, with your head on his shoulder as you brought your knees to your chest.

well, one thing nearly came close. 

you felt a drop of water on your nose, making you sit up fully as you let out a small gasp. 

“oh my god, is it raining?” you reached your hand to wipe the droplet off your nose, only for more to start dropping on your face, faster, too.

you didn’t see the way grayson’s face turned into a slight frown when you lifted your head off his shoulder, you were too preoccupied with looking at the clouds as more rain started falling down, almost in awe.

grayson then found himself smiling as he watched you look up to the sky and laugh, a sound he’d replay over and over on a record player in his mind. 

his gaze stayed on your face as you tilted your head back down and looked at him, a grin spreading across your face. 

“i have an idea,” you said in a sing-song voice. 

“no.” he deadpanned. 

“i didn’t even tell you!” 

grayson raised his eyebrows at you, a hint of laughter in his voice. “your ideas in situations like these are never good.” 

your jaw fell open in mock offense. “never good? well that’s just a lie.”

his lips threatened to turn up. you would’ve barely noticed if it was anyone else, but you noticed everything about grayson. 

“i apologize, never sensible.” he corrected himself.

it was already raining harder now, but you paid it no mind. looking into grayson’s eyes felt the same as looking up at the stormy skies. 

“and when was the last time you had fun doing something sensible?” you retorted, and now grayson’s barely there smile fully cracked. 

it made way for a chuckle as he looked away from you, a light shake of his head before he ran a hand through his hair. 

you knew you’d gotten him with that one, muttering a small, “exactly.” as you turned yourself around, looking through the bag you’d brought with you. 

after flicking through extra clothes, snacks, your phones, and a speaker, you found the item you were looking for. 

“hey, grayson, this is waterproof, right?” you called out to him as you pulled his camera out of its cover. 

obviously grayson hawthorne’s far-too-expensive camera was waterproof, who were you kidding?

he hummed lowly, more in confusion as to answering your question. 

leaning forward with your legs crossed, you you set up the camera against a tree stump beside you, pressing the record button as grayson watched you — still slightly befuddled.

“hey guys, it’s raining!” you spoke into the camera, adjusting it so you and grayson were in frame with the scene behind you.

“—i’m with grayson hawthorne right now, on a sunday, 6:32 pm, and it’s raining!” you reiterated yourself with a laugh, setting the frame for whatever version of yourself would be looking back at this video in the future. you with grayson, you’d silently hoped.

as you talked, grayson looked at you like you were so much more than you actually were, with so much love in his eyes. it stilled you for a moment as you saw it in the camera. 

your attention was no longer on the camera as you sat upright again, looking at grayson with an ever present smile on your face. 

“what?” you laughed quietly.

in all of his hawthorne manner, he answered your question with one of his own. “what are you doing?” he said, his voice low, almost drowned out with the patter of the rain and sounds around you. 

and in all of your “i love annoying grayson” manner, you didn’t answer his question. you simply grabbed the camera and stood up, and his gaze followed you the whole time.

you jogged towards the river, the rain soaking through your clothes as you went, and set the camera up again on a large rock. grayson’s eyes widened slightly as he watched you.

"what are you doing?" he projected his voice over the rain, punctuating each word as he grew concerned. 

you shot him a quick look over your shoulder, your smile growing even wider. "making real memories!” you exclaimed.

before he could protest, you made sure everything was in frame on the camera, then took a few steps back, your bare feet sliding a little on the wet grass.

"you’re not serious," grayson stated as he followed after you, but there was a tiny hint of humour in his tone now.

"oh, i’m so serious!" you shouted back, already running toward the water.

"sweetheart, wait—" grayson reached out as if to stop you, but it was too late.

you launched yourself off the bank and into the river with a squeal, the cold water hitting you like a shock to the system. it wasn’t that deep— coming up to just below your chest. 

grayson stood frozen for a second, shaking his head as he watched you pop up, gasping and laughing, water streaming down your face as you smoothed your hair back.

"come in!" you called, laughing breathlessly, lifting your arms to show him how much fun you were having. "you know you want to!" you added, giggling to no end.

he hesitated, eyes flicking to the camera that was still recording. "i have absolutely no desire to go in. i truly worry for your sanity sometimes.” 

"my sanity may be questionable, but at least i’m having fun!" you countered, the water swirling around your legs as the rain kept falling. "this is all on camera, gray. if you don’t come in, you’ll be known forever as the grumpy blonde who stood on the sidelines, while i had the time of my life." 

grayson davenport hawthorne would forever be known as a lot of things— and you knew you were going to keep this video as a keepsake for just you two. precious, untarnished with the effects from anyone else. just yours.

maybe not everyone would know the real him— which in fact wasn’t the grumpy blonde like you had joked — but you did. and you were endlessly thankful for that.

grayson let out a deep, exasperated sigh, running a hand through his wet hair before speaking. “you’re going to be the death of me, sweetheart.” 

"so are you getting in or not?" you teased, splashing water in his direction.

grayson looked at you for a second longer, hesitant, before pulling his shirt over his head, revealing his toned chest that had you grinning. 

this was always how it went with you two, but you liked — no, you loved it.

it was second nature for you two; you doing something he found reckless, and him following after you anyway. you completed eachother. 

he kicked off his shoes, then without another word, ran towards the water and landed with a massive splash.

you let out a huge squeal, shielding yourself from the wave and laughing uncontrollably as grayson surfaced, shaking the water from his hair.

you threw your head back laughing as grayson approached you. “i can’t believe you got in!” 

he let out a chuckle as he ran a hand through his hair, “you could get me to do just about anything on this planet.” he said softly, his hands finding your waist as the rain continued to pour around you.

you felt your heart skip a beat, but you didn’t let it show. you smiled up at him, the sound of the rain pattering against the water filling your senses. “just about?” you teased.

“anything.” he corrected himself, pulling you even closer against the water. 

"oh, that’s a dangerous amount of power to give someone, isn’t it?” you joked, putting your arms around grayson’s neck. “especially for a hawthorne like you." 

"oh, undoubtedly.” he teased you right back with a barely there smile, as one of his hands trailed up to caress your face. 

“even more so when it’s you." his voice was all low and smooth, it nearly turned you into putty in his arms.

"you’re lucky i don’t plan on abusing it," you said quietly, trying to keep things light, but you felt your heart hammering against your chest as his face drew nearer to yours. this would never get old.

he let out a breathy chuckle, shaking his head. "you already have, sweetheart." 

he said those words before finally pressing his lips to yours, and the kiss was perfect. it was everything and more that you could’ve ever hoped for, it was the rain kiss of your dreams. 

and just when you thought it couldn’t get any better, grayson’s hands travelled down to your thighs, signaling for you to wrap your legs around his torso. 

and that you did. 

you fought breaking into a smile as your hands weaved through his wet hair, and as you felt his hands on your body. 

it was nothing you hadn’t felt before, but it still gave you fireworks every damn time. 

—

as you pulled back back, both breathless and panting against eachother, you asked him a question. 

“you think that cameras still recording?” you murmured into the tiny space between you. 

“it can record for up to 48 hours before its battery begins to drain, its—”

you cut him off with a quiet laugh, “gray, a simple yes or no would’ve sufficed.”

he smiled, nodding and somehow putting his lips even closer without kissing you, “yes, then.” he breathed out— but you had a feeling he wasn’t really talking about the camera anymore as he pulled you in for another total mind-numbing, record breaking kiss. 

you didn’t need that camera to know that this moment would never be forgotten between the two of you.

taglist: @charsoamerican @ariabedumb @x-liv25-jamieswife @wish-i-were-heather @thecircularlibrary

@littlemissmentallyunstable @whatsamongus @anintellectualintellectual @bewitchingkisses @maybxlle

@sheisntyou @midiosaamor @emelia07 @sweetreveriee (if you’d like to be added or removed pls lmk! 🤍)

[kimbap-r0ll]

Hi!

Could I please request Ace, Deuce, Jack and Epel reacting to the reader wearing a cheering them on during a match/club event?

Hi, thank you for the ask! This is a really cute idea haha

Ace, Deuce, Jack, Epel x reader who is cheering for them in a match/club event

Ace

Before the game, he probably kept telling you "oh it doesn't matter if you don't go, I'll be sad but you'll ultimately be the one missing out" but he was honestly really, really hoping you would go and see him. Besides, who doesn't love a guy playing basketball?

If there was a Twst version of High School Musical this might be it haha. The way you basically cheered him on the loudest when it seemed like he had lost focus at a pivotal moment of the game and everything low-key seemed like it was from a music video

He would be super pumped you got to see him, hell seeing you made him kinda flustered. Like, he feels extra-ready to play? You'll often see him giving you a smile or a wink while he runs across the court and he catches your eye.

After the game, he will pretend like he didn't have any struggles, sort of like "yeah yeah I'm just that good." He has a bit of an ego haha, but either way he will make sure you know he was super happy you got to see him during the match. Sure he might be a little sweaty and a bit out of breath, but he'll still hug you and might lift you up a little bit

Overall, his ego will have a boost and he will be super happy. Will he talk about how cool he was in the game to everyone? Yes. Will he talk about the game with you for the next few days? Yes.

Deuce

He does Track and Field! Which honestly covers a lot of different activities, but he likes doing it with others. Because of this, you might catch him in the relay race events. He happened to be participating in the game that was coming up and (in a slightly stammered way) asked if you wanted to go watch him. Of course, you agreed and he was super grateful

To say he was a little nervous would be an understatement. He was already a little antsy with the competition but he was like "omg they're going to watch me I can't fail" and people might notice he's more jittery than usual because of this

The track is super big, so he doesn't know if he'll see you. However, you bet he would glance towards the audience before his event. If he manages to catch you in the audience, expect him to give you a small smile, maybe a little wave too. He'll remind himself that you're there to see him when it's finally time for him to run too

I think after the event he'll be super tired so he might not be as energetic when you get to meet up with him. However, he'll be blushing, slightly out of breath as he drinks from his water bottle, and will give you a soft hug. "T-thanks for coming today," he might say. If he won, he'll be super elated but if he didn't then just let him know you're still proud of him ;-;

Overall he's grateful you got to be there and cheer him. He wants to just relax with you afterwards, which means you two might be having a cozy movie night together at Ramshackle

Jack

He too is a track and field guy! I imagine he would also be a runner, and while he wants you to see him he's also nervous you might not really enjoy the event or you might be busy. He'll bring it up quietly, just like a "it would be nice, I have a track event coming up." Just know he'll be super grateful if you do agree to go

He's super serious during the event, you might think he forgot you were there because he doesn't at all look at the audience when it's his turn on the track. But his hearing's good, if you happen to be cheering for him really loudly he'll hear. He might not react, but he'll have a small smile on his face

I feel like this might be one of the first times you see him racing, and omg he's so fast. Like, you knew he would be but like this? He might've been faster this round because he doesn't want to lose but also because he wants to, well, impress you a bit haha. Sure he's a humble guy, but sometimes he likes to boast ;)

After the event he definitely hugs you and lifts you up in his arms. He might be a little worn out from the event but he tells you "nope I'm feeling the best I can because I get to see you." Honestly just your presence is enough for him, whether or not he won in the event.

I think after the event you two might take a slower hang out, maybe you guys cook together or watch a movie. Either way, he'll just spend some time with you relaxing and if you happen to pamper him during this time he'll be flustered with all of the affection

Epel

Epel's in Spelldrive! One of the biggest sports in the school, and one that you've had first-hand account in haha. You've probably watched Epel practice from time to time, but when one of the big school games come up, he'll ask if you'll go. He'll be a little shy about it, but once you tell him you're going he'll be super energetic (expect a very strong high five haha)

During the game, he might go close to the audience just to say hi to you haha. He was one of the strongest players for Pomefiore, and many of his classmates were cheering him on with you. Who knows, maybe you led a whole cheer with them haha

I think he would be super serious when playing but from time to time he'll look around to see you. He might've waved at you once as well! He'll do some extra tricks on his broom if he can just to impress you a little more

Whether or not Pomefiore did well, let him know you thought he did his best and that it was a lot of fun. He probably just liked being able to play and he'll let you know he's super grateful you got to watch him. Taking a bottle of water, he might tell you "thanks for coming today, I'm starving though so did you want to grab dinner together?"

Overall, he was super pumped to see you and definitely played a little harder than usual with you in the audience. You two will likely have a really good dinner together and if you want to, you guys might go on a magical wheel ride as well.

[losing-dog-art]

I just drafted all of this then lost it I'm going through a wall

Finished murderbot concept!!!

With bonus version with clothes 🎉

I have been making a lot of art lately (this is because I am procrastinating other things 😶)

Explanations below the cut (there was going to be a video but tumblr decided to fuck that)

So I have this old post about some head cannons for MBs appearance, but doing this full body design involved more thinking

I find it interesting that MB really only ever describes it's appearance when it's relevant to the plot/fight/scene, so anything that isn't relevant is left to our imagination. That being said:

MB says all it's inorganic parts are covered by a long sleeve shirt with a collar, pants and shoes. This means no inorganic parts on its face or hands

MB says it has no organic parts on its feet.

Slightly deeper cuts but MB mentions that it has inorganic and organic parts around its knees (I believe in exit strategy) and that it has an accessible company under its ribs (artificial condition)

People are often surprised when they see MB out of armor -- people who aren't familiar with secunits don't expect it to look as human as it does

MBs skin is canonically clear af (network effect I think)

Based on those handful of canon details, you can imagine Mb a lot of different ways -- this is great! And I've said before I think Martha Wells does this very much intentionally. So, that being said, here is some of my thoughts in this interpretation:

Based on that last point, MB looks surprisingly human. For me, this means soft facial features, eyelashes, and more organic parts than you might expect. Also, the inorganic parts are also round and nice looking -- this is partly just me thinking in a fun sci-fi way but also secunits are designed to be comforting

I've seen some people give it mechanical legs that are kind of bird-like or resemble running prosthetics. I think this is super cool and it makes a lot of sense-- those legs are basically a better form of bipedalism and let you run faster etc. BUT they would significantly change your gait. And thus be something MB considers when it is trying to pass as human. So I gave it more human feet, with the important toes and everything

I'm no expert on robotics or anatomy, but I really tried to think a little bit functionally. How would a secunit fold? How would it bend over, squat down, etc? I tried to give the look of some kind of shock system in the ankles, and conical-axis based joints. the hip area is probably the weak point in my design in this areas, idk, imagine ball bearings or something

For clothes, it's pretty straightforward. MB describes this more than a few times, but I tried to give some slightly fun sci-fi decoration bits

I tried to think about how androgyny might be generated in a silhouette in an unintentional way -- androgyny that is the result of functional design decisions and not aesthetic ones.

Idk. I had a lot of fun with this. This took about 4 hours (I've been trying not to overwork stuff lately and let the process show through) I might try and post the speed-draw video later? As a reblog perhaps. Idk Tumblr didn't like it the first time

Also a girl on bumble mentioned reading all systems red and I had to act so normal

[thesharktanksdriver]

Any thoughts or ideas of DC Comics!magical girl reader in the Teen Titans (2003 version)?

Bro I love 2003 teen titans sooo muchhhhhh. It was so good.

In dc magical girls timeline Dick is already grown up but meeting 2003 Dick would definitely interesting! I imagine in this some dimensional shenanigans happened leading to the 2003 cast ending up in their universe.

She’d get along with them like a house on fire, it’s honestly kinda funny how the moment the crew of teens spit her she somehow integrates with them seamlessly.

I imagine magical girl y/n as kinda deadpan most times and somewhat stoic. It’s kinda a product of her childhood (or lack thereof one) and being slightly jaded with the world due to her duties to protect it. So having kids her age who are shackled with something similar yet are more optimistic (hell even Raven seems more happy than her sometimes) kinda lifts her mood.

I’d say within the group she’d find them all to be uplifting but would especially like how they try their best to make her feel like her age again.

Starfire takes to try and engage with “girly” stuff the Tamaranian girl had seen in tv shows and magazines. Having “girls nights” where Starfire, along with Raven and the batgirls force y/n to enjoy things they once never had the time nor privilege to experience. Things like painting her nails or even just the simplicity of having another girl to talk to about things like dealing with societal pressures and the influx of weird creepy guys despite being literal children. Along with this Starfire would absolutely be obsessed with y/n’s ability to change their magical girl outfits and Rigel. Y/n would most definitely at one point twin with Starfire and the two would be a dynamic duo.

With Raven there would be a kinda camaraderie in both being magic users that have to deal with larger and more complicated threats. Raven didn’t exactly have the best childhood and neither did y/n, the both of them having to grow up faster than everyone to protect not only themselves but others as well. Along with this the two of them are more of a quiet force, though for different reasons. While no one sees the two of them openly talking much they’d definitely have a deep and quiet kinda friendship. One where in the middle of the night they sit atop Wayne manor and just kinda enjoy the silence or speak their minds.

For Cyborg he kinda just took one look at them and being the extrovert that he is adopted them. Not in the literal way but in the way an extrovert spots an introvert and someone absorbs them into their friend group kinda way. Either or he acts as y/n’s voice in some situations and makes sure they’re included. He’s a bright and inspirational pillar to y/n, someone who’s not only strong and intelligent but also is able to balance being a kind and loving person. Though he can be serious when he needs to he’s can also struck a balance between that and cracking jokes. I’d like to think that when seeing y/n’s more stoic composure he makes a challenge with the others in who can make her smile more. Like he’s tallying everything down, small barely visible smiles are 1 point, a somewhat clear one is 2, ones where it’s a full on one is 3 points and a laugh/giggle is 4 points.

You’d best bet beast boy is acting like a hyperactive ball of sunshine who doing as many cheesy puns as possible. It’s kinda like how he is with Raven but with less threat of being sent to the shadow realm and more just blank face stoicism with a small shimmer of amusement he can see in their very tired eyes. Though he can loud and a bit childish y/n would really enjoy his presence even if they don’t outwardly say it. If he’s smiles and sunshine then their the calm peaceful presence looming beside him as he drags them away to go and play video games. He’d definitely at some point shapeshift into a ferret to look like Rigel, the “real” ferret giving a small sound that seemed like a chuckle as it curled around your neck. At some point Damien is probably dragged into a weird friendship with him, cyborg and y/n. Two extroverts and two introverts on all ends of the scale.

Robin/Dick would definitely be the most interesting of the bunch especially considering how there’s an older version of himself and the Robin currently is Bruce’s biological kid who’s wielding a sword at everyone. Either way Robin being ever resourceful adapts with his team and strikes a friendship with the relative oddball in the Wayne manor. Both 2003 Robin and y/n in a lot of ways are similar due to the responsibility on their shoulders and having to be at the forefront of it. But unlike y/n Dick is able to better cope and handle it which he sees y/n still somewhat struggle with. Both he and the alternate older version of himself kinda team up together in dragging y/n away from tirelessly working or going on patrols alone. Along with that he’s kinda able to see when he himself is pushing himself too far and how that hurts not only himself but others through y/n.

Sorry this took so long to answer and how lengthy it is lol

[onebizarrekai]

totally valid, i like looking at your works sometimes, i can tell they're very thoughtful! i like the fact you tend not to leave things unanswered unless it's a great question, demonstrated by the fact you have a height reference tag LMAO, i've wondering if there's anything in kcu or ds that you've never said about them before, even just the most fandom facts character-oriented or not! or if not, is there any scrapped concepts for eithier that you decided not to introduce?

heck! there's probably so much. I have so many docs sitting around about everything I've made, some having collected more dust than others. I can give you some fun facts about various things I've made. I don't remember which ones have been mentioned or not, so I'll try to find really specific things.

ink was going to be the literal son of satan in the old version of fatal flaws exclusively for the meme

kevin the chicken appeared in the bizarre saga as a different godly talking chicken character before dreamswap

there's a lot of stuff I haven't shared about the kcu because it's unfinished and I'd like to complete it when the dangan vibe comes back, but I gave byakuya a relative named tony t. togami who works at the future foundation and he's absolutely terrible (in a good way). there is also a character named the alpha roomba, but I will not elaborate at this time

the kcu is an honorary video game, because there's a roomba racing minigame and one of the expert mode challenges is kaito, who is always slightly faster than you

with greyscale's art style, I was planning on adding more and more colors in every chapter as they befriended more people, while xaki stayed more monochrome until their heart was opened in the end. it was a cool idea on paper, but it ate through my art supplies and nowadays I would prefer the art being easy to manage over the metaphor.

have I ever mentioned that I occasionally imagine ibvs as a beat 'em up game with crappy ds graphics

the evil sans squad was going to exist in ibvs (back when I was first coming up with ideas for it, like a long time ago) until I realized that they had no reason to be in the story besides utmv points and also completely undermined nevin and chris's plotline

felix was going to be a one-off villain but then he kept coming back and now he's the main villain of season 2

honestly you can safely assume that I've imagined almost everything I've made as a video game at some point

[homestuckreplay]

Here's How GG Can Still Win

(page 637-650)

9/14/2009 Wheel Spin: Movie Reference Verdict: John’s Life Might Be Too Weird For Movies

9/15/2009 Wheel Spin: being silly :3c Verdict: being scared and terrified D:

John’s hammer, despite being sick as hell, turns out to be dangerous for him too. This is poetic, given the number of injuries he sustained from the pogo ride as a child, that he’s now finding newer and better ways to injure himself with it. Rose’s sweet catch is really good – and I’m always impressed at her 20-dexterity video game reflexes snatching Dad’s PDA from the air and sliding John’s bed beneath him just in time to avoid injury – but in this case, her move also stops John from falling through the hole into Dad’s room. Is this a coincidence, or is she still focused on stopping him from getting in there?

The Big Imp has entered the house, but is too big for the rooms inside. It’s going to cause serious destruction just by moving around if John can’t kill him soon – and John’s reached a high enough level that a second one is following close behind. It makes me wonder if the Big Imp will drop different, stronger types of grist that can be used to reinforce the house against mundane physical damage. Server player is definitely a full time job despite what Rose says about being ‘just a facilitator,’ and when Rose does enter the game and has to divide her time between server and client goals, this game is going to get even harder.

The visuals of page 641 don’t quite work for me, as the top two pictures overlap each other, and it’s hard to make sense of where the overlap begins - I turned it into a single image to get a better view (comparison below). I think this page would have worked much better as three sequential pages. The following page does this much better – despite the white space between panels, each starts where the previous ended, and it comes together in a visually pleasing way. I mention this because the problem will only compound as the scale of John’s house continues to increase, and the necessary aspect ratio continues to change. There are rare examples, such as pages 376, 484 and 494 where slightly taller images are used, and there are also animated and [S] pages, such as 246 and 250, where we are able to zoom out or pan up or down to see the world on a bigger scale. We haven’t seen it yet, but there could also be interactive panels, where we can use arrow keys or zoom buttons within a panel to see different parts of John’s house ourselves, while sticking with the standard panel dimensions – like having access to a ‘view only’ version of Rose’s server controls.

‘TT: In a way, thieving you of your free will as an adventurer, and the need to advance by your own skill and ingenuity.’ (p.643) I think it is deeply arguable how much free will John has as an adventurer or player, and I hope that the explicit mention of free will means it will be discussed in more depth later. The mechanic does make sense, though. If Rose could just pick up the bed and click and drag John to the first gate, that’d be a huge exploit in the game. Despite being in beta testing, we haven’t really seen any bugs in Sburb so far – it’s extremely well made and tightly programmed, arguably more so than most AAA game releases.

I thought Sburb would operate on video game logic where player characters don’t need to eat, sleep, use the bathroom, brush their teeth, or do other human things to sustain themselves, so long as their gel is viscose enough. So, what does it mean for John to sleep within Sburb? Is sleep still necessary for human survival, is it unnecessary but simply nice to take a nap, or is it something that could provide game benefits – such as minigames that can be played while asleep to gain extra resources, faster/automatic recovery of gel, or saving the game state to potentially return to that point later?

Also, the new sleepy John song is very windchimey to me, reminding me of Windchime Foley from page 82.

‘if you obtain the code for any item at your disposal, you think you could theoretically send the code to John and he could make it himself.’ The Sburb server disc didn’t work out, but Rose’s instincts are good. I wonder if there are any other items in Rose’s house that could help John out. Such as, I don’t know, whatever she’s got hidden in that purple box on p.218. A Grimoire for Summoning the Zoologically Dubious could be helpful too, as could a 20-foot tall granite statue of the mighty wizard, ZAZZERPAN THE LEARNED. This sadly makes me realize that Sburb alchemy is restricted to items that are small enough to captchalogue.

It’s certainly interesting that the Sburb server CD doesn’t have a captcha code – this must be intentional on the part of the developers. The relationship between the captchalogue system and Sburb as a game is really interesting to me. It makes sense that certain items just can’t be alchemized because they’d break the game, and these items wouldn’t need codes. We know that the Medium, where John is, exists outside of time – how possible is it that the sylladex system is also created by Skaia’s power (as it transcends those same digital-physical boundaries) and was always created to be a companion piece to Sburb? Or alternatively, did the sylladex system exist previously but without the codes on the backs of cards, and Sburb has somehow exploited that existing system to place those codes only on cards that will then be used in alchemy?

The forest fire is approaching Rose’s mausoleum much faster, and now the generator has gone out. It either hasn’t recharged the laptop’s battery at all, or its shutting down has caused the laptop to shortcircuit, as Rose’s laptop immediately goes dark. This is certainly much more dramatic than switching back to battery power. I asked a few weeks ago for the tension with Rose’s situation to ramp up so Act 2’s pace can accelerate, and I think we’ve officially hit that point – which I’m really excited about.

Rose’s main focus is on saving herself. This makes sense on two levels – she’s scared and entering self preservation mode, and it’s also necessary on a practical level, because John can’t progress in the game if his server player dies. I see Rose as someone who likes to be independent and self-reliant, and it must be hard for her to have to depend on someone else to get out of this situation. In this way, she’s the opposite to John, who wanted Rose’s help but was left without it when her laptop died – I love the storytelling here, it’s a great beginning of both their character development to challenge them and put them out of their comfort zones like this.

So, who will be Rose’s server player? Dave seemed likely, but he’ll almost certainly have to escape Bro’s rooftop saw traps before he can get the discs, and I don’t think Rose can wait that long. John seemed possible, but Rose’s plan to send him the disc code failed, and I highly doubt he’ll locate his dad’s car and the original disc any time soon. That means the only person left is our good friend gardenGnostic, who also happened to be the person who originally tipped Rose off about Sburb. This would be poetic, going from the snow to fire, from talk of a dead cat to sitting beside its corpse, from the birthday gift of an important tip to the ultimate gift of saving Rose’s life.

I think Homestuck will throw a curveball and suddenly introduce GG at Rose’s moment of greatest need, just as Rose was introduced at John’s. So far our characters have been introduced in early act 1, late act 1, and early act 2 – so if act 2 is heading towards endgame, which I think it is, this is the moment to finally reveal GG. They’ll need to happen across a server disc somewhere, so whatever the source of their prophetic gifts is could kick in to reveal its location. Alternatively, GG has said that ‘mail takes a while to get anywhere from here!!!’ so if they have been signed up as a beta tester without their knowledge, some delayed mail could be arriving right now. Either way, I think we’re about to get GG discovering a disc and swooping in to save Rose.

[k-tarotz]

AHHH THAT BEOMGYU READING WAS ADORABLE

can i request one on how jay from enhypen would treat his crush please? thanks!

Thank you!! I'm happy you liked it lovely!! <3

Yes of course, Jay is someone easy to read too hehe!

Feel feel to like and reblog this, thank you!<3

Paid personal readings | paid kpop readings | masterlist

How Jay acts around his crush:

King of wands, the chariot

More Optimistic in general he would become a bit more optimistic, I think he might be realistic in general, but being around his crush would make him think more positively about many things. But even about things like a new music video, new album and such stuff would make him more optimistic as well because he would genuinely be curious about his crushes opinion and reaction to those.

Best version of himself he would also be the kind of person who would try to better himself, even though he is doing perfectly fine you know? As for his personality I feel like he would try to be more easy going than he already is in general. As for looks he would try to look more manly, despite that he already is. He might wear jackets more often that make his shoulders look a bit bigger tbh sunghoon would do the same, probably prefer to wear black more often as well as he might view that as a colour that makes people look more attractive

Nervous man man man... when I tell you, if he is around/near his crush he would get so nervous that for a moment he has to check if he is still wearing his pants or shirt- I absolutely don't mean this in a nsfw version, but you know some people have those dreams where they go out of their house forgetting to wear a pants right? In that moment he would think something like "hold on- do I still wear my clothes? Do I have something on my face? How is my hair?" Boy would overthink it for a few seconds there but who is he to blame? No one wants to accidentally embarrass themselves in front of their crush, we all want to look amazing around them

Trying to joke more often so jay is someone who likes to rather joke with his friends that he knows for longer, like especially if he doesn't know his crush for too long yet, but honestly I think if he is really comfortable around his crush regardless of that and likes them genuinely a lot - he would love to make them laugh. It would make his heart flutter so much and genuinely fill him with joy because not only is he seeing his crush laugh, being able to see their beautiful smile and hearing them laugh, but he would feel so warm and proud of himself that he is the reason why his crush laughs. I don't have enough words to describe how happy that would make him, but it would be enough to make him joke around more often than usually. One of them being puns! "Do you like jay-pop? I do"

Shy but proud so if his crush compliments him I can see him blushing slightly being a bit shy about it but at the same time it would make him feel proud and boost his ego in a good way, his heart would beat faster and he might chuckle because shy, maybe even his hands would get a tiny bit sweaty in that moment but he would smile brightly and his eyes would lit up

More confident Jay is unfortunately someone who can be quite insecure about himself, even though he really is such a good person, but spending time with his crush, words of affirmation, quality time and other things he would receive from his crush (and also give! He isn't selfish at all!) All that would lead to him gaining more confidence

More healthy if his crush takes care of him while he is sick, or genuinely tells him they are worried about him - I think he would take that to his heart. "My crush and my friends and family care about me, I shouldn't worry them!" Which would lead to him trying to take better care of himself more often, even trying to get rid of bad habits that he might has (like for example overworking himself or perhaps eating too much junk food)

More happy and also more chill I think those are the most obvious so I won't expand too much on this but he would genuinely be much more happier, he would especially love it if he can rely on his crush and go to them to talk about God and the world for hours, he really enjoys deep conversations. He would also be a bit more carefree and easy going, usually he can get sulky or mad quite easily but I feel like if he spend time around his crush and then something none serious yet bad happens he wouldn't get mad or sulky rather just laugh over it, like even if there might be a small fight with a member he would rather try to make up than to add to the fight or get emotional over it you know?

Enough confident to take action so I think after a while, it depends a bit how close he is with his crush so it can be weeks but it can also be months, he would definitely want to confess. He would feel confident and comfortable enough to gather hod courage up and confess, instead of waiting for longer or wanting his crush to take action. I feel like he would definitely plan out a proper confession. Not just a "Hey I like you, do you want to go out with me?" And especially not through texts. He is the type to want to do it in person and also see his crush's real expression after his confession.

Romantic so we all know that jay is a hopeless romantic, who would he take it out on? His crush of course! Especially the confession would be super romantic. He would literally plan it out first. I can see a beautiful candle dinner outside maybe in an empty park or a empty beach, near/during the sunset and there probably being a bottle of wine, glasses, a wonderful (probably self made) dinner, beautiful flowers in a vase on the table and lots of rose petals on the ground and some on the table, also forming a heart. Let's Also not forget about the candles. I also feel like after he already prepared everything he would go and pick his crush up, lead them there but blindfold them shortly before they reach their destination. Boy would be so excited yet nervous. I almost forgot but he would definitely ask his crush to dance with him right there (with music, after their dinner) in a very close yet romantic way. After his confession and his crush saying yes he would give them some sort of jewelry, either a ring, bracelet or a necklace. I feel like it's the last option and he would help them put the necklace on.

Aside from all of this those are also all the things he would be towards/around his crush, even before the confession: loyal, kind, helpful, gentleman like, playful, generous, paying attention to detail, jealous, perhaps a tiny bit possesive but really nothing serious, lovely, caring, honest

Disclaimer: this was made with tarot, intuition and a bit of analysis, don't take anything too serious please, it's mostly for entertainment purposes! The divider isn't from us, credits to the right owner!

- Hun

[biaswreckme]

until the break of dawn | jongsan

San's touches to Jongho's shoulder in Wonderland (Symphony No.9 "From The Wonderland") into something more after Coachella.

Fandom: Ateez

Pairing: Jongho/San

Member: Jongho, San, mentions of the other members and relationships

Word count: 1500 words

Genre/Tropes: Canon compliant, Romance, Fluff, Smut

Rating: mature, 18+

Triggers/Warnings: smut, crying, mutual masturbation, no dialogue, implied polyamorous ateez, a little bit of hurt/comfort

You can read it on: AO3

Skinship was not something Jongho was ever incredibly fond of, but over the years living and working in close quarters with the other seven members made him aware of his limits and needs. He would frequently run or push the other boys away, but sometimes he craved and even initiated physical contact. 

When they first presented the new version of Wonderland, he was up on another level of the stage by himself, none of the others with him in the most nerve wracking moment of the song for him. As they continued to perform the Symphony 9 version on stages, they changed their positioning so he would walk out in front of the members to hit his high notes. It was subtle and he was confused the first time, but there was a comfort to the hand San pressed to his shoulder, almost a motivation for him to continue - it was an extra burst of strength and a signal that he was there for Jongjo.

So he started to yearn for this moment whenever the song was on their setlist, and they never talked about it, but it was a given that San would give him this encouragement. When they decided to include the song as the ending for their stage at Coachella, he knew he would be nervous, but he did not truly know the magnitude or the pressure he would feel when the moment arrived. They were all on the edge of their seats, knowing how much their performance would mean and how heavy their shoulders were.

When the time came that first weekend, he paused and took a deep breath, closing his eyes momentarily so he could gather the most of his energy and calmness to avoid making any mistakes. He felt San’s hand pressing down on his shoulder, a little bit stronger than usual, but they were all slightly more intense with the performance, feeling like they had to prove themselves to the world. But it worked; the stronger pressure ground him enough for him to confidently sing his part.

So in his week off he went back to Los Angeles while some of the members stayed to enjoy the festival and other activities. He knew his members worried about him using his time to have singing lessons, to try and better himself, so they reassured him, even sending videos and articles of people who didn’t know them commenting on Jongho’s incredible voice. He was fine, it was just an opportunity he didn’t want to miss while in the city. 

And then the second week approached, faster than he would like, but there they were again in that stage, curiously enough named after the same desert they started their career in back in the day. There was something different in the air that second night. They were having more fun, sure, but in giving all of themselves to the performance, they were also more tired. The wind was strenuous, their energies feeding off each other, internal chaos trying to get through to the end. He was sure that later at the hotel they would go off with their closest pairs to recharge, to balance their emotions, and he was - and it hurt him to admit it - not really sure who would be there for him. Hongjoong and Seonghwa, Mingi and Yunho, Wooyoung and San, and maybe Yeosang would join them, for he had seen the new developments between the two old friends.

He heard more than saw Seonghwa scream, shout out, giving himself that last burst of passion. And then it was his time, going to the front. He took his deep breath in and let it out, quickly closing and opening his eyes, bracing himself for the moment. San’s hand, San’s touch was even stronger this time around, almost searing hot through the layers he was wearing, as if he could feel the shape of the other man’s fingers. He could feel the great intensity of San’s gaze on him, indeed much stronger than the previous week. And then he did it. They all did it.

On the backstage and on the way back, as Jongho had predicted, there was tension thick enough to cut through with a knife, bodies shivering and teeth clenching with the remnants of the high emotions of that last stage. But not all of his predictions were correct. Hongjoong chose Seonghwa indeed, his touch so gentle against the older’s face, gathering his tears, pulling him towards the bedroom. Yunho, still with his fingers adorned with the silver claws, grabbed Mingi by the jacket, subtly touching the similar cross that hung heavy around the other’s neck and went to another of the bedrooms they had on the floor. Then came his surprise: Wooyoung entwined his fingers with Yeosang’s, a hypnotizing gaze on the transparency that the man was wearing, muscular chest for everyone to see, but only for him to enjoy that evening. And then there were two.

San extended his hand for him, a silent question in his face, an invitation, an open bedroom door. And Jongho took it. He knew once they crossed the threshold there would not be going back to the way things were before, but then again he was not sure he wanted everything to stay the same. He could feel his fingers were shaking - maybe his entire body was shaking - as San closed the door behind them. There was still silence. After all the emotions of the night, the loud music, the crowd, it was nice and comforting to not speak. San pulled him towards the bedroom, and once inside, started to slowly shed piece by piece of clothing; his own was easy and quick, but he took his time undressing Jongho, each item carefully folded on the fancy bathroom counter. 

There was a sense of easiness in the air now for a second, yet with both bare and not having anywhere or how to hide, Jongho soon could feel his eyes watering at San’s intensity, becoming overwhelmed by the attention. Before San could ask, though, Jongho took a deep breath and hugged the older, not minding the sweat and nakedness that usually bothered him. It both comforted and opened up the waterworks, his words spilling out uncontrollably the same as his tears. As he opened up his heart, San gently led him into the shower, turning the water on to a warm temperature, starting to wash away Jongho’s worries and insecurities, and in soaping him up, tried to instill with his words all he felt for the younger, his pride, his admiration, his love. They lost time, water starting to run cold.

Tomorrow morning or afternoon they would have time to discuss exactly what everything meant, the intricacies of this newfound passion between them - and what it would mean to the others now that Jongho was a part of it, but mostly to the two  members who were currently in the bedroom across from them, surely in the same state of undress. For tonight, they would focus on the moment. They finally turned off the cold water, goosebumps on their skins not only from the chill, a sliver of nervousness passing through both of them. It wasn’t like they were inexperienced, especially San in his - quite loud at times - relationship with Wooyoung, but it was always intense sharing a first with a lover, especially after such a powerful evening. 

The fluffy and warm towels barely met their bodies before they were falling into bed, a messy top lip kiss before they delved into a deeper and more sensual battle, legs entangling, getting even closer to one another. On their sides looking into each other’s eyes, breaths mingling with moans and shivers as spit-covered palms glided along their erections, feeling, discovering the familiar yet foreign skin. They were used to taking showers together, changing in front of the other members out of necessity but this was different. This was nakedness with intent; touch with intent of pleasure, of giving and taking. Of taking until their breaths were hitching, eyes closing and hands grabbing at each other at the sensations overcoming their bodies, reaching their peaks together.  

And now the air was light, soft giggles permeating the bedroom, trying to rile each other up to wash their hands and clean themselves again, rushing back to the bed. There was something about hotel rooms that made things easier, it was almost a limbo between the real world at home and this suspended romantic disbelief. They would rest under the soft lamps and white sheets until reality came knocking on their door. Jongho, however, no longer had any apprehension of becoming part of something bigger, of becoming more comfortable with the other’s constant touches, reaching for each other without even noticing. Even in his almost slumber, San was reaching for him, mumbling soft words that caressed his ears and his soul, and the ache so present in Jongho’s heart for so long was finally starting to be placated. 

[laxmiree]

[CN] MLQC Lucien’s Warm Fragrance Date translation

⚠️ SPOILER ALERT!! ⚠️

This post contains a detailed spoiler for a date that has not been released in EN yet! Feel free to notify me if there are any mistakes in the translation~

Arriving As Promised Free SR Event | Prologue+Day 1 | Day 2 | Day 3 | Day 4 | Day 5 | Day 6-9 | Warm Fragrance Date (You're here!)

"I think, rather than a good little assistant, it's more accurate to say that MC is a very talented gardener lady."

"Huh? Why do you say that?"

Lucien doesn't directly answer my question, instead, he pulls my hand and places it on the location of his heart.

I immediately understood the words he didn't say.

"This beautiful flower continues to grow, connecting all the veins that are linked to you."

[T/N: VERY RECOMMENDED to read the event story first because some convo on this date will make more sense if you read the event stories first]

[Date – Video ver]

(T/N: As always, I always recommend watching the video for a more comprehensive experience.

If the direct video doesn’t work - [Use this link]

(Besides, tumblr doesn’t allow us to use an old text editor anymore so I can’t add up more than 30 pics in this post. Tumblr post alone won’t capture the change in background and sprite as usual(for reference I always have like 60+ pic in one post LOL)

[Date – Transcript ver]

[Part 1]

The gentle morning sunlight pours down, passing through the vines on the wall, casting specks of light and shadow.

I look around, and as far as my eyes can see, various types of plants occupy my surroundings. However, I don't catch sight of Lucien's figure amidst the lushness.

MC: …Is Lucien not here?

I double-check his text message, then I put down the jasmine flower pot I've planted and the "OPEN" wooden sign. Afterward, I turn around and walk deeper into the greenhouse.

Today is the official opening day of the "Flower Shop." Perhaps 'Shop Manager' Lucien is currently preparing in some corner.

Following the path through the greenhouse, I continue forward. The comfortable temperature in the air makes me feel as if I'm in an oasis.

Under the towering green plants in front of me, dozens of calla lilies are cozily undergoing photosynthesis.

Next to the one blooming the most vibrantly, there's a label that reads "Reserved." My fingertips brush against that familiar handwriting, and I mutter softly.

MC: Miss X?

MC: ...I can't believe there's a reservation already.

[A throwback to Dance SP MQ and main story Dr. X :"]

I can't help but sigh, and I bend down to carefully observe these well-taken-care-of plants and flowers.

The snow-white petals of the calla lilies bloom brilliantly, and the leaves stretch energetically. The red and yellow tulips nestle against each other as if even the falling patches of light have become gentle.

??: Have you been here for a while? Why didn't you call out to me?

A familiar voice sounds behind me, and I quickly turn around.

The sunlight filters through the glass roof and falls upon Lucien, outlining a faint halo of light around his figure.

His white shirt appears exceptionally bright amidst the lush surroundings. His collar is unbuttoned, and he casually rolls up his sleeves, revealing his slender forearms.

The blue work apron he's wearing is loosely tied, and he doesn't seem to have noticed. A warm smile graces the corner of his lips.

With the jasmine pot I had just set down in his arms, he slightly bends forward and reaches out to hang the wooden sign on a nail above the railing.

This version of Lucien catches me off guard, and I find myself laughing with a belated realization.

MC: Pfft.

Lucien: (laughs, then playfully says) It seems my outfit is indeed a bit funny, isn't it?

MC: Of course not, "Shop Manager Lucien" is much more handsome than I imagined!

Lucien: Oh? Is that so?

Lucien slowly approaches me, and as his familiar scent envelops me, my heart rate instinctively quickens a little faster.

Lucien: (chuckles) So, can you tell me, what did you imagine 'Manager Lucien' to be like before?

MC: Manager Lucien's appearance right now has completely erased any other imagined images I had in my mind.

I hook my arm around Lucien's neck, a smile playing on my lips.

MC: Right now, my heart and eyes are filled with just the one before me.

I retie the loosely knotted apron behind him smoothly. But as I start to pull my hand back, he captures it in his grasp.

The next second, a gentle kiss carrying the scent of grass lands softly on my lips. Before my eyes could fully close, all that was left in my vision were those eyes brimming with joy.

Lucien removed his glasses at some point, and the gentleness in his eyes reflected my gradually reddening cheeks clearly.

Lucien: (whispers) Everyone else is busy in other greenhouses. Today, there are only the two of us here.

He slightly increases the distance between us, his brows and eyes curved.

Lucien: I remember that a lady once said that on the day she visits my "garden," she would buy the most beautiful flower from me.

MC: I remember that. I won't easily back down from my promise.

Lucien: Then, how about becoming my assistant? Consider it as payment for the flowers you intend to buy.

I tiptoe and peck his cheek on the side.

MC: Of course I'm willing to.

[Part 2]

As we walk through the corridor built with flowering vines from the entrance hall, the floral fragrance becomes even more rich and fragrant.

Lucien leads me through the corridor, and a lounge surrounded by flower walls comes into view. A row of bookshelves and an innovative instrument sit quietly in the corner.

Lucien: This is a newly introduced instrument from the Bioscience research center. It can measure various values of the brain's nervous system to detect the brain health of residents.

Curiously, I approach the instrument, looking around with keen interest.

MC: Can brain health really be determined using these two lines on top?

Lucien: If you're curious, you can put it on and give it a try.

Lucien noticed my eagerness and took the instrument's wires, guiding me to position my head correctly.

Lucien: Bring this wire over here, and place this device on here…

Following Lucien's guidance, I carefully placed the device from the instrument's wire onto my head.

Lucien: Now, let's take a look at Visitor MC's brain health, shall we?

MC: …Um!

I stare at the screen intently, and after a while, a green curve with a centered slope appears on the display.

MC: How is it?

Lucien: Hmm…

MC: I-Is it very bad?

Lucien: (chuckle) Very healthy.

MC: Phew…

MC: Back then, you were worried I might not adapt well, but the truth is, my "vitality" is quite resilient as well.

Lucien: How come I remember that it was a certain lady who was more concerned about me at the time?

Lucien: You prepared all sorts of emergency medicines for me, yet you only brought a small amount for yourself.

MC: Well, that might be because I've been eating well, sleeping well, and thinking about you a lot…

Lucien: From a medical perspective, perhaps "thinking about me a lot" played the most significant role.

MC: Although you're right, 'Professor Lucien' shouldn't go against medical principles just to prove the importance of "thinking about you".

Lucien places his hand on the top of my head and proceeds to explain seriously.

Lucien: Medical studies have confirmed that positive emotions, or good moods, are beneficial for brain neurons.

Lucien: I believe this 'Professor Lucien' hasn't gone against medical principles.

Lucien: People, scenery, animals, objects... all can serve as triggers for positive emotions.

Lucien: Including the plants we are cultivating now, it's all for studying the effects of different species on brain neurons.

MC: Does that mean that even for the same species, the experience could be different for different people?

Lucien: Exactly. The factors underlying the generation of positive emotions vary from person to person, and the feelings evoked by the same external factors can be completely different.

MC: Hmm... just like how I feel happy when I drink sweet milk tea, and Professor Lucien feels happy when savoring a cup of tea?

Seemingly amused by the interesting analogy, Lucien chuckles softly.

Lucien: (chuckles softly) Yes and no.

Lucien: If we slightly modify the reference in the comparison to "savoring tea alone and drinking milk tea with MC," for me, the latter naturally brings more happiness.

MC: Oh~ So the Great Professor's sweet words must also vary from person to person, right?

Lucien: Hmm... Not exactly.

Lucien: To be precise, I'm only like this with you.

I can't help but raise my lips; a kind of subtle tenderness seems to be quietly emerging from the depths of my heart, making me feel light and I can't help but indulge in it.

MC: I'm only like this with you too.

The conversation is interrupted by the hum of the instrument, and the fluctuation in the green curve produces new monitoring data for the device.

MC: Huh? Is there a new change?

Lucien: Mm, it seems that at this very moment, this little lady is happier than before.

The rising curve on the screen dances exuberantly as if it wants to reveal my thoughts in full detail.

Feeling somewhat embarrassed, I remove the device, afraid that the next moment it might detect those beautiful feelings in my heart once again.

MC: Alright, alright, I admit that indeed "thinking about you" played a significant role.

MC: So... Professor Lucien, do you think about me a lot too?

Lucien: Yes. Because I miss you so much, it feels as if the flowering period is endless.

Lucien's gaze softens, and the corners of his eyes curve like a gentle spring, causing the humidity in the greenhouse to quietly evaporate, filling the room with a sweet fragrance.

[Part 3]

After becoming familiar with the structure of the greenhouse, Lucien guided me through the final preparations before the official opening.

Since he has already completed most of it, my next task is to transplant the calla lilies into the flower bed.

Lucien: Here are these new gloves for you, and take this too.

Lucien hands over a brand new pair of gloves and then takes out a beige headscarf, naturally tucking my hair behind as he ties it on me.

His slightly warm fingertips inadvertently graze the back of my neck, creating a subtle and ticklish sensation.

Lucien: Hmm, you indeed look very cute with it on.

Lucien places a small red trowel in front of me and begins to demonstrate personally.

Lucien: Calla lilies thrive in a humid environment but are sensitive to waterlogging. They have high water requirements, so the root seedlings are crucial.

MC: I remember you mentioned in the email that Calla lilies, being plants adapted to humid regions, are much more challenging to grow in the desert compared to other plants.

Lucien: That's correct. Therefore, during the transplanting process, be careful not to damage the root seedlings with the trowel.

I nod and carefully take the calla lilies that Lucien has prepared, ready to transplant them into the flower bed.

The delicate and fragile root tendrils seem as if they could snap at the slightest inadvertent touch, and I take a deep breath subconsciously.

Lucien: (gently) Take it easy.

Lucien gently squeezes my hand, and the familiar reassurance gradually soothes my emotions.

I nod and readjust my breathing.

First, plant the flower seedlings into the small holes that have been prepared in the flower bed. Then, rearrange the positions of their roots, and finally, cover the soil from the side onto the flower seedlings…

I'm mentally rehearsing the steps Lucien taught me, carefully following the instructions as needed.

MC: Wow! It's a success…

Before I could even finish cheering, the next moment, the flower seedling drooped in front of me.

MC: ...Oops, did I just waste a flower seedling?

Thinking that each of these flower seedlings was personally nurtured by Lucien in such an environment, I can't help but feel a sense of guilt and regret.

Lucien: You didn't, it's just not fully acclimated yet.

Lucien: Don't worry, let's try it again.

Lucien said as he leaned closer to me, his palm gently cradling my hand. He carefully adjusts the position of the flower seedling and then presses the soil down slightly.

As if by some kind of magical spell, the delicate flower seedling trembles and sways, but it never topples over.

MC: Is it... a success?

Lucien: Yes, you did great.

With the experience of this successful attempt and Lucien's hands-on teaching, I learned some small techniques, and the subsequent transplanting process is going much smoother than I had imagined.

MC: Phew, just one more pot to go until we're done!

As I said this, I raised my hand to wipe the sweat from my face. I was about to dig out the seedling from the pot when Lucien suddenly chuckled.

MC: ...What's wrong?

He raises his hand with a smile and the clean back of his finger brushes against the tip of my nose.

Lucien: You've turned into a spotty bunny.

MC: …!

Thinking about the "fertilizer elements" in the soil, I hastily raise my hand and start randomly wiping my face.

Lucien can't help but laugh, then he grabs my hand.

Lucien: (laughs softly) If you keep rubbing like that, our spotty bunny might turn into a black bunny.

Lucien: Let me help you instead.

He uses the clean part of his palm to gently wipe across my face, bit by bit.

The delicate touch of his fingertips and the warmth from his palm gradually amplifies.

His breath, accompanied by a warm breeze, audibly falls on my ear, and my earlobe subtly starts to feel ticklish.

At some point, his gaze has shifted from my face to my eyes, and his finger lightly taps on my cheek.

Lucien: Now it's clean.

I can't seem to take my eyes off his face for a moment.

Lucien: (smiles) Do I also have something that needs wiping on my face?

MC: Ah? Well, right here on the chin…

I lift up my sleeve and gently wipe away the almost invisible speck of dirt on his chin.

The scent of flowers blending with the earthy aroma lingers in the air, and a gentle kiss softly grazes my cheek near my lips.

Lucien: Thank you, Miss Gardener.

[Part 4]

After a day of busyness, the flower shop's business is doing quite well.

People keep coming to buy flowers and admire them, and Lucien can smoothly carry out his experiment. He has printed a thick stack of monitoring data alone.

Until the sun sets in the west, everything except for that reserved calla lilies has been sold out.

MC: Looks like it's time to flip the signboard and announce the closing time~

Lucien's gaze falls on the back of the wooden signboard, his fingers tracing the patterns on it.

Lucien: Unexpectedly, there is a "gardener fox" on the other side?

MC: You noticed it!

I said as I leaned closer, my fingertips lightly tracing the slightly crooked wood-carved design.

[So it's her 'artwork' that she mentioned in the event :"]

MC: I carved it based on the desert fox's appearance and added a little touch of my own creativity.

Lucien: It's a nice touch. A little fox wearing glasses, an apron, and holding a pot of flowers.

Lucien: Hmm... Is it like this?

Lucien speaks as he raises the sign next to his face, mimicking the posture of the little fox on the wooden sign.

MC: Hahaha, it seems I carved it quite lifelike!

MC: By the way, after closing the store, let's go see the desert fox together~ I saw it last time near the sand dunes near the guest house.

MC: This time, I have Mr. Fox with me. So who knows, we might just have a smooth encounter with it.

Lucien: Of course, that's great, but I'd rather have a chance encounter with a desert rabbit.

Lucien: This little fox seems a bit lonely. I think this wooden sign leaves me some room for creativity.

[He also wants to carve a dessert bunny to accompany the dessert fox so it won't be lonely🥺]

Lucien carefully puts away the wooden sign and retrieves cleaning tools from the greenhouse.

Lucien: You've been busy all day, take a break. I'll handle the cleaning.

MC: There's no way the little assistant can take a break and let the big professor be busy.

MC: Besides, I've been resting well these past few days, but you've been in the experimental greenhouse all this time. I think you should be the one taking a break.

I say this while playfully pushing his back, half-forcing him to go rest on the sofa next to the flower hall.

Lucien accommodates and sits down but takes the opportunity to hold my hand.

Lucien: Well, there's no reason for the little assistant not to listen to the professor.

I can't resist this demeanor and tone at all, so I have to compromise and sit down next to him, nuzzling up against his side.

MC: The little assistant is now obediently resting. Professor Lucien, do you have any more requests?

Lucien: I think an obedient little assistant like you should receive her well-deserved reward.

Lucien promptly gets up and when he returns, he's holding the only remaining pot containing the calla lily with "reserved" written on it.

Seeing me blink in confusion, Lucien smiles and speaks.

Lucien: From the moment it miraculously survived, I selfishly reserved it in your name.

MC: My name? Does that mean…

At this moment, I finally realized belatedly why this unique pot of calla lily had been reserved early on and kept until now.

That Miss X is actually myself.

MC: So this calla lily…. is the first one that survived as you mentioned in your email?

Lucien: Mm. You mentioned wanting to see it with your own eyes, and now it's yours.

A gentle voice brushed against my heart, and I quickly took a few steps in his direction.

He cradles that pot of calla lily in his hands so dearly, and I feel as if I can hear something blooming in my heart.

MC: It's really beautiful... From this angle, the outer edges of the flower look like the shape of a heart.

Lucien: Perhaps that's why the calla lily's flower language is "the veins of our hearts are connected together".

The pure white petals sway gently in the soft breeze of the flower hall, the sunset's light casting a golden shimmer on Lucien's eyelashes. The picturesque beauty momentarily left me a bit entranced.

It's only when he bends down to place the flower in my hand that I realize our distance has somehow become so close.

Lucien: I think, rather than a good little assistant, it's more accurate to say that MC is a very talented gardener lady.

MC: …Huh? Why do you say that?

Lucien doesn't directly answer my question; instead, he pulls my hand and places it on the location of his heart.

I immediately understood the words he didn't say.

Lucien: This beautiful flower continues to grow, connecting all the veins that are linked to you.

A soft feeling wells up in my heart, his warmth in my hand, and before me is his most familiar expression.

The accumulation of longing and his gentle words make me unable to resist leaning my head against his shoulder and nuzzling it.

MC: I'm the same.

MC: Every move you make, it's all connecting with me.

MC: Sowing, nurturing the soil, watering, fertilizing, and then the flowers bloom…

MC: Every time you share these with me, it's like I can feel your emotions in that moment.

MC: You sharing your happiness with me makes me feel even happier.

Lucien: Mm, I like sharing with you.

Lucien: (softly) It's like we're taking care of them together, and you're right here by my side.

MC: If that's the case, then I'm just like you.

MC: When I see the photos of the seedlings you post, I imagine how you planted them.

MC: When I'm planting jasmine flowers, I also feel like we're nurturing them together.

MC: I get incredibly happy when I receive emails from you, and I imagine the world you see through the things you share.

MC: I feel like I have something to look forward to every day because of the promise I'm about to fulfill, it’s as if... all the waiting and longing is sweet.

Lucien reaches out and pulls me into his arms, affectionately nuzzling the tip of my nose.

Lucien: (tenderly) Endless is just a broad concept of time, it doesn't even begin to capture a fraction of my longing to see you again.

Lucien: MC, I miss you so much.

Lucien: Even though you are right in front of me.

The gentle breeze, carrying the fragrance of flowers, rustles the branches and leaves inside the flower hall. In my ears, there is the gentle rustling of leaves and Lucien's slightly sinking voice.

In a moment of reverie, the hues of the sunset have a scent, and the fragrance of flowers has a sound.

I submerged myself in the veins of his longing, where love flourishes abundantly, lush and verdant.

[icouldntfindquiet]

omg how did you find it? I've never seen it before!

Sorry—just gone and deleted it temporarily as I cut it prematurely. Gonna upload a slightly longer version where you can see the transition to Glasgow! It’s a massive video so it’ll probably take 10 minutes to upload. 😂 Here’s the link if you want to see it straight away. Instagram is much faster than Tumblr.

I found it on the Russian equivalent of Facebook! It’s blocked for me in the US but I could somehow access it in the Google search app. Enjoy the video! Outside is a phenomenal song live. 🤗

[four-loose-screws]

So glad to see you're enjoying engage! I love the game myself! I'm curious to see if there's any differences in Alear's character depending on their gender? Like, in English I get very different vibes from them due to the voice direction of their VAs despite them both having the same exact dialogue (I am biased to male Alear). Their model expressions also read differently, but I was wondering if there was actual text differences in the original script for Alear's different forms.

Fair warning: a basic understanding of Japanese pronouns and speaking styles will help this post make the most sense. But the general point should get across to anyone.

So a bit of context first, for those who may not be familiar with the Japanese text of the FE games since Awakening: For Robin in Awakening and Corrin in Fates, each gender has a couple of different I-pronoun options to choose from, to allow players to further customize their My Unit. Each I-pronoun variation genders Robin and Corrin's speaking style in slightly different ways. It's all very Japanese, so the options couldn't translate over in localization.

There are also conversations that are completely different in subject matter between male and female Robin/Corrin, mostly because romance was being limited to opposite-gender pairs. That's a totally different level, so generally those different conversations were translated over in localization, with the occasional exception - the only example I can immediately think of is Corrin / Rhajat being commonized to the m!Corrin version.

For Byleth, there's not much to say about how they talk. No surprise there as we all know they are mostly mute.

So considering everything I know about Robin and Corrin, I was VERY surprised to learn the answer to anon's question!

There are zero dialogue options to choose from for Alear, and not only that - both m!Alear and f!Alear speak exactly the same. The writers achieved this by choosing the most gender neutral style possible for Alear.

Alear ends all their verbs with desu/masu conjugations. Different sentence endings can have different gendered connotations in Japanese, with desu/masu being essentially the default, and formal option. Japanese people use desu/masu in pretty much all situations when they are not with family and friends. (Though laidback people will speak as little desu/masu as possible. Higher-ups can also be casual with those in a position below them. Etc. etc.)

Alear's I-pronoun is "watashi.' Like with desu/masu, you can consider this I-pronoun to be the "default" in Japanese.

And their you-pronoun for everyone else is 'anata,' again the "default."

This is not to say this is the only way the JP writers could have achieved f!Alear and m!Alear having the exact same dialogue, but it is the most straightforward route. Other pronouns like 'boku,' 'atashi,' 'ore,' etc. would have implied different connotations when one Alear used them over the other. And there are further options, but the deeper you go into the list of JP I-pronouns, the more specific in usage they get - like 'atai' or 'ora' implies characters are "country bumpkins" like Jean, Donnel, or Mozu. (This is because those pronouns are from different regional dialects in Japan.)

Of course, there are not zero differences in the text of m!Alear vs. f!Alear's conversations. But the differences are just limited to he/she, Veyle calling them Big Brother vs. Big Sister, and anything in that vein. That's it.

P.S. - For a fun fact on the voice direction between m!Alear and f!Alear's voices in JP: f!Alear speaks a little bit faster than m!Alear! This video of f!Alear's Ring Supports is 1 h 37 mins long, but this video of m!Alear's Ring Supports is 1 h 40 mins long.

[hospitalterrorizer]

diary361

9/15-16/24

sunday - monday

sleepyyyy...

it's ... 1 pm ... i am trying to do an all nighter but i don't think i can do it... dang...

i worked on music and stuff, i played more sh3, i went back to the pc version i updated my drivers it seems to be a little better at least ummm...

not much else... i'm actually so tired suddenly it hurts almost, i just want to sleep, my skin feels gross, i just want to sleep.

i just washed my face. feeling a little better.

thinking about how the whole electroclash thing right now might be going up in flames faster than anyone thought. it's hard to say that seems like it would be sad because a lot of them might deserve to have their spot blown up i guess. deserve feels harsh but i don't know what other word to use. i guess i could say it's fate, it seems fated that this will go poorly. it's sad how good the music, how bad the scene seems broadly, or i guess, that it's not as popular as it could be, and there's people with people already into them, already getting eyes and stuff, like sam hyde and shed theory, so they go over to them to get more attention, and those people let them get that attention because working with new people doing new stuff is going to legitimize them slightly, it's just gross, unpleasant, on top of that there is of course the likelihood of sexual abuses. i don't like even having this in my head, but other people do and it's like the flu, it just goes from one head to the next. "explain the allegations" and then no one says a thing, messages deleted, you're like "what are you talking about" and then it's like, tweets from months ago, totally vague, deleted accounts, it's not even that it's 'shady' it's that there's so little, it's like, everything's kind of reaching a point of eternal if you know you know, and it feels like this doesn't stem from some conscious decision as much as like, okay, this is semi unrelated, it's also very related but this example is more about the dynamics of this, the hellp released a music video on dvd, no one has ripped it and uploaded it, someone ripped it, and is literally scared of putting it on mega and needs someone else to do it instead because... i dunno, they say it feels like instant gratification, and there's real fear, there were also multiple days where this person struggled to figure out how to rip a dvd. which is fine, or whatever, they don't need me to sanction what is and isn't okay but that's not the object i'm getting at, it's really just like, it feels like people are currently very bad at stuff i might describe as like, well i don't even know how to describe it. it's on one level almost a technical feeling failure, and then on the other, there's something that feels like willful ignorance, remaining confined to certain avenues of like, communicating, certain methods, almost like... yeah like they imagine the information will flow if they remain in a certain region, like twitter or whatever, the information will materialize, the truth will emerge, not realizing that not everyone knows, something might need to be surfaced at all. it's weird weird weird.

this song is good ,

i #likeit.

i also read this, it was posted by someone who i am in a server with but scarcely know:

i wasn't so sure about it until the ending, i was basically enjoying it, but the ending made it very beautiful, the three of these people as messages constantly traveling to one another, back and forth, never meeting, noncommunication, forever sending/speaking oneself without oneself, super-reduction.

here's a scan of 2 pages of a book of photos, titled "70's tokyo transgender".

i quite relate to her. i really love her outfit, and that collar.

i've just downloaded i saw the tv glow. i have a lot of friends who hate this movie, i think maybe i am going to agree with them and maybe that's no way to go into anything, i'd like to be wrong, or i don't know. i know too much about the film, there is this sense that, no matter what, what it does, i will not find it....maybe that is the final word on it, i will not find it. what it does, i will not find. or i'll see, and not sense, it's going to be like that. it might miss me, or upset me, i feel like though, the upsetting would mean it works? or it's proven something? we will see i guess. suddenly i am less tired. stupid how these things can go.

well i've watched the film. i don't know what to make of it, it's got so much around it, it's good i waited because there's less surrounding it, still, though, it comes with baggage, the way it was wheeled around and explained even before it came out, it carried that baggage, or some. it feels meaningless though, that's the feeling i get from it, meaningless, and it brings forth pity for owen, of course. i don't know, it just makes one feel bad. i also don't think the movie's as simple as people make it out to be, as in, i don't think it finds owen entirely wrong to be afraid and run away, to say this is reality, to have memories of parents, that part touched me a little, i remember playing in the snow, cooking with my mom, the mom is something hardly examined in the film, her death, it feels like that's part of the impossibility for owen i guess. not some guilt just, never attempting to begin dealing with things. maddy is the same way though, i don't think they really... i don't know. if you view maddy as correct, it poses the notion that to transition, and i guess that this intense metaphor taken up, this is all super-human, super-real, you transcend, maybe there's some kind of attempt at a dialogue between these notions and the notion that you're going to be you, also, that there's a history? are we to discard the histories? i can't tell. i can't, at least. but my history isn't so rigid anyways. i was a girl before, sometimes, i guess i was less afraid than owen, or i got over it quicker. the fear in owen is kind of, well everyone i know says it's cruel, by the end, it really is, it feels hateful, help me you need to help me i'm dying, i've seen people say 'they didn't help themselves', i can't understand that. it feels didactic, it's trying to teach you how to be yourself, if it were wholly committed, it would abandon the fuzziness of maddy's character, perhaps i'm too interested in nuance and hallucinating that fuzziness. i can't tell. my friend says he feels it's muddy too. i guess i'm at least not alone. the movie makes me think "i don't know" because i can't tell, am i supposed to see that, being what "i" "am" and experience recognition? because i felt what i recognized was some tulpa a bunch of trans people on twitter have, of how badly things could have gone. of some person unnamed, maybe a vague memory of a cluster of negativity, it feels like a meditation on that, rather than questioning why it was born at all. i keep saying i don't know. i said to my friend, it felt like someone's episode preserved in amber. i've been thinking about silent hill 4 lately, and how henry is nobody, he's so nobody it hurts, he's actual, because every one of us reacts incorrectly to things, at some point, we're obliterated by events, and we just travel through them, the terror and abjection, sad and grey transitory points, ambulate until you stop. it's only real when you're at that point of total evaporation. here, there is too much content, the suffering is too pointed, it's all about something. for others, is it the primary thing? sometimes, i feel so ugly i think i have to die. some days, i have to rescue my friend from a club while he's high on ketamine with my girlfriend's brother. in either case, i am the same, in either case, i'm nothing at all, i'm just breathing air, exhaling other stuff, spacing out and then focusing. maurice blanchot's thomas the obscure gets at the sensation of living. other books do too. clarice lispector is a luminary as well. this wants to explain to you how to live but it seems to not understand, or when it briefly does, i don't know, the fact it gestures at it, and walks past it, betrays the not understanding maybe. it would be in the non-sense of it. it's all too well put together. but i keep wondering, i don't know why it's so pathetic, or maybe i do, it's sad to see some affective range squashed down to one thing. i got disgusted at one part, where owne says, i have my own family, i love them more than anything else, then making a face while holding a cardboard box containing a samsung tv.

the face is "i just lied, or i am so disgusted by what i have said" or whatever, and it made me upset, because something bothers me profoundly about the idea of a person having children and resenting their children, maybe that's the point, that you become a worse person forever when you deny yourself. but it feels so cruel, it's this thing that's like, it's good you're afraid, it's good it's painful, because that means it's "actual" and "true," as if this isn't a cruel way of thinking, as if this isn't some nightmarish christian vision of the world that subjugates everyone to some terrible struggle of constant observation of the dimensions of your hell to enjoy some kind of truth, or that you are liberated after, it promises heaven, maybe not, maybe it does gesture at the process of the whole thing, as in, a process of pain or pleasure or nothing, of every day. it feels zeroed in on the transcendence, though. or some supposed transcendence. maybe i am not enough to know that feeling, maybe i am some minor thing, i can't tell. but as i think this film out more, or as i wander sleep deprived in circles around the pile of corpse-images that this film is, well i guess i feel worse. it reminds me of all the discourses people used to have on twitter, they still must be having them i've just stopped looking, the stuff like, it's too late, or the stuff like, you'll never be what you thought you would be (who ever is?), all that, it's all that, it's people's nightmares, it's like a figment you can imagine to torture yourself. it's like a folk tale, is the "repressor" a folk tale? it gestures at letting itself be purely about the abjection, the pain of not being able to, which might be more open, and freeing for people, to see some tragedy play out, without goal or social good in mind, it would make the moment where owen screams at the child's birthday go over better, screaming "mommy" out of pain instead of expressing pain to show you, you'd better not be this. there's a point where there's chalk on the ground, it says, you still have time left, but there's only so much filled in with chalk on that length of road. it's all limited. it's an insane vision of life, it's just a life lived under terror rather than... i'm not sure. when i attach things like this to philosophers, i promise i'm only trying to get at how they formulate things as a way to get past an issue. with bataille, he wants terror, he loves terror, and horror, wrongness, i do to, but he embraces it, surviving it, bringing to mind toreadors killed by bulls, this is one image, and the eye shot up to the girl in story of the eye, and she placing it in her vagina, life at the excesses, pregnant, bursting. the fear of schoenbrum is one which really aligns itself with the fantasy of the suburbs, that this is all just so, here are the bounds of possibility, to be queer is almost infinite youth but only if you admit it to yourself before a certain point. it is a little hideous, once again, it is cruel, cruel without...pleasure? if it seemed to hate anyone, if it had the desire to laugh, ever, outside of one or 2 times, if it laughed or were actually funny, would this solve some issue? if it knew what it was, if it knew this terror was as funny as it is pathetic, could it dredge something up out of itself? i can't tell.

i keep thinking about it, because i kept seeing people say, this movie really proved to me, what i am, this movie made me know, this movie saved me, this movie is going to save people. it might save people so the last one i have no issue with and maybe if it does it is valuable no matter what? i dunno, but i kept seeing people say, this will mean something, and i just think i have to come to terms with the fact it means nothing to me, which makes me feel cruel and terrible. because it makes me see a lot of people who feel that way, i don't know, i want to beg them to think of things differently, that the world isn't such a fucking nightmare, at least, not in those terms, it's not a nightmare of being too late, it's not a nightmare of fucking fomo, it's not a nightmare of twitter discourse come to life, it's a nightmare of these disparate visions wrestling in darkness, it is a nightmare of the fact that you are all the things behind you, or, they are the particles and history and context that add up to right now and as the event arrives, any, crossing the street to deaths in your life you are evaporated and that fine mist, the fine mist is made up of those things in miniature, impossible to taste, or sense, impossible things, they go somewhere from there, and you condense, it occurs again. it is that terrible wandering, dancing, leaping, whatever. it is a beautiful and wretched process. it does not care for that. it is locked inside a world of fearing what you missed out on in highschool, the people you don't know anymore, it is a dumb film. it is a dumb film.

though i quite liked connor o'malley. he was funny. his ability to be funny is muscular though, it is by force, a break-in, into an otherwise... whatever thing. one last note about that scene with the chalk, owen is standing right on the threshold it is so painfully, dreadfully obvious. laura palmer in fire walk with me expresses so many torments of being trapped in the suburbs so much better... or being trapped at all, being made to be someone. thinking of laura makes me want to cry. the film makes leaps at lynchisms (supposedly, i suppose i saw them but they felt so not-that (they felt how... direct to tv movies feel when they try something that can't work?? (donnie darko as directed by the sy fy channel??))) but doesn't know why lynch works. the soundtrack also, was a mess. the film ending with owen getting to watch their memories of their favorite kid's show as they remember it in a tv in their chest is infantilizing and hateful almost. yukio mishima made great art about the terror of aging, of losing the luster of one's flesh, the anxiety of losing yourself to time. he always knew the folly of the terror, he knew his own stupidity, constantly, you can see it in the book star, it's staring him in the face, his impending failure. so he kills himself. what else are you to do when you are afraid of such a thing, but die. this film contains a lookist heart. if it were 10% more evil, it would contain subliminals telling you to begin mewing.

i have to suh-leep now,

so

byebye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[not-radioshack]

Writeup: AOpen i945GMm-HL shenanigans

AOpen i945GMm-HL - The Retro Web

Welp. This board is weirder than I ever thought it'd be. Not the board in general, but the specific one I bought.

To begin, it turns out that my particular board, and likely many others of the same model, are OEM-customized boards that AOpen provided to a little company called RM Education. They make all-in-one PCs for the UK market.

...And they are using evaluation BIOSes (in other words, BIOS software that's normally only meant for prototyping and... well, evaluation) in their retail boards.

My specific board contains BIOS version R1.08, which is actually R1.02 apparently. There is evidence of an R1.07 existing as well from a reddit thread on the r/buildapc subreddit, but I doubt that it's been dumped anywhere.

Moving on to the original point of this writeup, I got this board because I wanted to build a system that pushed the 32-bit Core Duo T2700 as far as possible, meaning I needed a mobile-on-desktop board. AOpen built a reputation for doing this sorta stuff in the 2000s, so I went ahead and picked one of their boards for use (although I would've much preferred using the top of the line AOpen i975Xa-YDG instead if it were being sold anywhere. That's a VERY tasty looking board with its full size DIMM slots and SLI-compatible dual PCIe x16 slots and ability to crank the FSB all the way to 305MHz).

Slightly surprisingly, the Core Duo T2700 is quite the overclocker! It's able to push from 2.3GHz all the way up to 2.7GHz with some FSB overclocking using the SetFSB tool. It's multiplier-locked to a range from 6.0 to 14.0, so I can only push it through this means.

The board I'm using, the AOpen i945GMm-HL, supports running the FSB up to 195MHz. It's okay-ish in terms of stability, but crashes when running Aida64 benchmarks unless I loosen the memory timings from the 5-5-5-15 settings that it uses at 333MHz to 5-6-6-18, which is just the tiniest bit faster than its stock settings for 400MHz operation by SPD. With these settings, it's much more stable and is able to run the benchmarks, though unless I lower the FSB from 195MHz to 190, it will consistently crash Chrome when trying to play Youtube videos on integrated graphics. I'll likely experiment some to see if adding a card capable of handling the video playback in hardware helps.

For now, this is all for this blog post. I'll follow-up with more details as they come in reblogs. As follows are the specs of the system:

AOpen i945GMm-HL (OC'ed from 166MHz FSB to 195MHz, 190MHz for more stability)

Intel Core Duo T2700 @ 2.7GHz (OC'ed from 2.3GHz)

2x 2GB Crucial DDR2 SO-DIMMs @ 5-6-6-18 timings

Some random 40GB Hitachi hdd lol

Windows XP Pro SP3, fully updated via LegacyUpdate

Supermium Browser (fork of Google Chrome and the reason why I was able to test Youtube playback in the first place)

Coming up: Installing One-Core-API and Java 21 to play Minecraft 1.21 on a 32-bit system out of spite for Microsoft "dropping support" for 32-bit CPUs.