#this is really cheesy in my phrasing but its whats on my mind rn
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every time someone comes out to me as trans i feel this great ache. like thank you. for trusting me, for being kind to yourself in admitting this, for being brave. im sorry for all the ways the world wont be ready for you yet.
#my sibling came out to me last night#the transfem experience can be so intense and scary and honestly were not close but i hope they find peace w their experience#ok to rb#transgender#lgbtq community#lgbtqia#queer community#this is really cheesy in my phrasing but its whats on my mind rn#ive been several peoples first coming out experience w both transness and queerness#and its an honor but no one person can set you up for what your experience will be#i just hope i offer something of meaning to these ppl#the queer community means so so much to me#as someone who experiences low empathy it always shocks me how much it makes me feel and brings up the empathy i so rarely feel intensely#might delete this later bc the tags are very ranty but still ok to rb if it resonates w u#or edit it later to remove the tags
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System collapse notes made as I read:
(Spoilers, obvs, mostly out of context)
Amazing opening page as usual. This feels like coming home I'm so happy
Side note, "one of you" - like, is this being delivered to an actual audience, or does mb just like to pretend it is? I know it's just an in-universe excuse for the conceit but either option is so good
ART canon tax fraud?? ART canon embezzlement???
ART @ BE ship: "people die in car crashes all the time. I just thought that was interesting :)"
The note about iris having grown up alongside ART is so funny. And the note about her being ART's ratthi is so sweet from both sides of that comparison
I adore Three so much. The fucking baby deer comparison killed me this poor construct
I could be misremembering but it feels like secunit's narration has more colloquialisms than before, which is fun if I'm right
Love than mb and mensah have the exact same reaction to the extra settlement lmao. Handshake meme
ARGUCUSSION
SECUNIT YOUR BOUNDARIES. YOUR NEEDS. PLEASE STOP TELLING PEOPLE YOU'RE FINE
"Fun stuff like space battles and rescuing people and space monsters and throwing asteroids at planets" this bot loves its cheesy tv so much I'm gonna cry
WHY DO YOU KEEP REDACTING THINGS SECUNIT PLS THIS IS STRESSFUL. I can't tell if this is it editing out trauma discussion or something else
Mb casually using ART as a dictionary lmao
Oh god is it hurting over 2.0 specifically. Oh man of course it is. God this poor bot I'm so 😭
Mb and ART working as a team so fluidly.... best friends......
Ratthi can tell secunit is busy thinking/working just by glancing at it.... FRIENDS.....
"SENTIENCE SUCKS" LMAO. YEAH OKAY WE'VE ALL FELT THAT
MB JUST HAS THE VIDEO FILE OF RATTHI ALMOST GETTING EATEN BY A WORM ON HAND. AMAZING
Mb and pin-lee bonding over watching scifi car crash videos. Incredible
SECUNIT THE SELF-DESTRUCTIVE TENDENCIES. LITERALLY TRYING TO JUMP OUT OF A PLANE WITHOUT A PARACHUTE. PLEASE
I'm gonna cry pls mb stop beating yourself up for being traumatised. This is exactly what you were giving mensah shit about!!!!!
"It was always my job to get hurt" I Am Going To Fucking Cry
CITING ITS SOURCE ON THE PRE CR HISTORY LESSON LMAO
God I feel like this poor bot spent six books building up its confidence and it's all just been shattered after the thing with 2.0. Like it's so palpable in the narration that it thinks it's broken in some way and is forcing itself to carry on regardless but with no regard for its own survival, which has always been of pretty high priority for it even in ASR!! It's let itself get beaten up in the other books but it's never been reckless like this. Mb please stop punishing yourself.....
Ohh tarik and mb shared corpo trauma..... can we talk about that maybe
Ratthi correcting iris about the ex-secunit thing.... ouuououugghghh
"Under normal circumstances that would be kind of hilarious" mb honey as a reader. That IS hilarious
Mb "so is this guy your..... ex-security..... not that I'm feeling jealous or insecure rn....."
HEY GUYS YOU EVER HAVE A PTSD FLASHBACK SO BAD YOU PASS OUT. GUYS
HEY GUYS HAVE YOU EVER HAD YOUR BRAIN-CRASHING PTSD FLASHBACK ANALYSED IN DETAIL BY A BUNCH OF PEOPLE YOU WANT TO RESPECT YOU
Mb once again having the worst time of its life but being offered a media archive by a friendly bot: oh fuck yes hello there
Ooooh pre-corpo media no less......
THE ART THERAPY-SPEAK..... "that’s for humans" "this affects the part of you that is human" I'm going to yell and yell and yell
"No, it doesn't read my mind, it just knows me really well" 🥺
I feel like MW has gotten more up to date on current gender/pronoun usage since the earlier books which is nice to see. We've had neopronouns before but having pronouns attached to feed/character intros is new and appreciated
Mb: "aw fuck am I being tall and intimidating again"
Local secunit physically repelled by power phrase "sexual discussion" like a fucking skyrim shout
VISUAL EQUIVALENT OF A WET BLANKET..... SECUNIT......
OHH...... OHHHHH!!!!! OHH MY GOD THE. IS THIS THE. WHEN I TALKED ABOUT THE CONCEIT EARLIER.........
Oh okay no BUT MURDERBOT NEW CREATIVE DIRECTOR POSITION BABEY!!!!!
And ratthi is so supportive. God I'm so. AAAAUGH
Just patch out the anxiety lmao. New mental illness fix dropped please restart your OS to apply
Telling your bestie to fuck off IS a kind of love language and I'm glad that ART appreciates it 😌
LITERALLY "(INTERNAL SCREAMING)". LMAO
Mb literally in a life or death situ rn: I could just burn part of this person's brain out to save us..... that seems mean though :/
"I lack a sense of proportional response" LMAO ART. At least it's self-aware
"I didn't come here to make friends" says the secunit who literally cannot go anywhere without forming some kind of allyship with someone
The delayed-hack though, that's fun. Wonder whether this file is gonna slowly make its way from CR secunit to CR secunit as mb gradually becomes some kind of mythic figure, lmao
"Be safe" 🥺
FINAL GIRL IS OUT. FINAL DRONE IS IN
ART: "Oooh you guys care about me ^^ lol"
LMAO ART YOUNGER SIBLING BEHAVIOUR
ALSO YES SET THREE UP WITH THE OTHER CRAZY SMART AI THEY CAN ALL GET A SECUNIT BESTIE!!!!
Murderbot trauma acknowledgement 😌 You go working through your feelings mb you're doing so well ily
WHERE ARE WE GOING NEXXXTTTT THAT IS INDEED THE QUESTION!!!
Summary thoughts: this was really good and I like that MW has taken the time to address the NE fallout before moving on to whatever is coming next, I'm mostly just excited for that whatever-comes-next now. I didn't expect this story to still be focused on the same planet, but it's cool that it was! And now we're moving on with more machine intelligences and rogue secunits in play!! And they mentioned the comfortunit from artificial condition so hopefully that'll come back into play soon as well! I feel like something is building up wrt construct rights in the setting and I'm very excited to see that, but in the meantime I loved getting this familiar romp through MB having a very bad day and working through its emotions while also trying not to die. And it was fun having the twist on the usual formula with things being so isolated and it having to handle everything while being off its game, it felt a lot more tense than some of the other entries just by virtue of the fact that MB's narration was so much less confident than usual, and it made it really nice to hear the fire come back to its voice once we hit that point in the story. 11/10 as usual I love this bot so goddamn much
#wastepaper basket#I think I had a tag for murderbot liveblogging at one point but idr what it was lmao#Just be advised there's spoilers below the cut I guess!#But my spoiler-free review is thst it's amazing as usual and I love this bot so so so so so much#Oh wait I remember the tag#murderbot lb#I think some of these got eaten when I saved the draft at some point or else they'd be even longer lmao.....
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Hiii Art!! How have you been and how's your work/studies whatever it is that you do. Good? Eh? Well mine's kinda on a dry and wet mode rn lol.
Mind if I rant here?
I have 2wk worth of exams coming up and I have no motivation to study. I honestly regret taking up the course im studying for. I mainly took it up because its lucrative and helpful in today's economy. But honestly I should have just pursued 14yo Lyfie's dream to become a nurse. It wouldve been so much more rewarding🥲🥲🥲.
Anyways despite that im just praying my gpa doesnt go down the drain, and im gulity right now because i wasted the whole day doing nothimg even though i told myself to go study. I couldnt do it. I just......well i knew what i was doing was bad but everytime i looked at my notes i felt as if i knew them all, and in the end achieved nothing. Sigh i hate myself for how repetitve this unhealthy cycle has become. Parental pressure isnt helping either. I try ranting and they say its just momentary tiredness and it would go away soon and then further guilt me into wasting time :((((.
Wow that became long. Im so sorry for litterally trauma dumping on you, especially if tou had a long day. It would be the last thing you'd wanna worry about 😂😂😂
Anyways i wanted to ask you about your writing, both as a fellow fic author and as loyal reader of yours. What inspires you to write?
(I.e set time aside to write your fics and even feel motivated to open up that document? I have so many plot bunnies, headcanons and fic ideas, but no matter how enticing, everytime i try opening up my google docs, that burst of excited energy saps away. Urgh its so frustrating!!😠)
And for your fics, we had possible teases of engagement btwn jk and oc and even f2l hopelessly pining jk and oc. So i was wondering will we ever get a confession scene 👀👀👀?
I rmbr when jk ssid somewhr in an interview where he would love to lift his partner up and kiss them and my mind went str to the in which couple lol knowing your writing and since its jk its gonna be so cute cheesy and gonna involve tears 😇.
Funny enough i also know that both oc and jk are heavy on respecting e/o be it space or privacy, and when i heard Twice MISAMO's Do Not Touch song which was about consent and it was potryaed beautifully compared to art masterpeices, it got me thinking about their initial stages of skin ship or how they got comfortable around e/o physically or even their first time. Idk im just so invested in this universe lol 😭😂
Hmmm, but thats it for now. I'll reach out to you soon!!! :D
-Lyf
hiii lyf <3 work is draining and some customers are rude but my co-workers are fun to be with so it’s alright 🥲 uni also started this week and it’s nerve wracking but also soooo exciting !! i’m just gonna need some time to adjust to this new life + schedule 😬
i’m so sorry to hear that beloved :( i’m sure with the given the circumstances that you chose what you thought would be best for you at that time and i think it’s important that you recognize that too !! 🫂 and yesyes studying is so freaking difficult especially when you don’t feel motivated >:( for me personally time management has been pretty helpful. i love schedules ^^ sometimes i do house chores first to get my brain into work mode too and i give myself little rewards during break times (which are sooo important) or after studying hehe like snacks or screen time !! please look after yourself and your health. 🥺
dw i’m mostly fine with you guys ranting about stuff like school !! because same !! but i’m just putting it out there that when it’s abt triggering stuff i have to restrain myself 🥲 i don’t reply to those because it really affects me badly mentally too :(
hmmm when it comes to inspiration to write 🤔 like i said i do love schedules hehe i open a draft every night before bed + in my notes i also save words/phrases/scenarios that pop in my mind throughout the day but couldn’t write yet :D but i don’t really get to write everyday bcs i’m too tired or nothing just comes out. sometimes i only write one sentence or one paragraph then pass out lol. on a good day i finish one scene and maybe start writing the next too !! a jungkook weverse live will always 100% give me a big rush of motivation tho 🤭
and i doooo want to explore the earlier stages of oc and jungkook’s relationship 🥹🥹🥹 i have many many plans !! but i just want them to be perfect so it might take me a while </3 this is still a long journey if y’all are up for it hehe thank you so much for being invested in our little iw universe !! 🥰 it truly means the world to me that i get to enjoy my passion like this :") ilysm lyf 🫂
#omg yes i think about that interview all the timehdkdjkf like he is such a romantic!!! i get so giddy when i remember 😭#art’s post office ☁️#lyf <3
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1, 9, 12, 18, 21, 27, 32, 36, 42, 48,'50, 51, 69, 77, 81, 84 pls❤
*1. Are looks important in a relationship?*I’d be lying if I said no? But also I actively try to decolonize my ideas of beauty and work on stuff like ableism and such. Its rlly helped me figure out what I ACTUALLY find attractive, and it’s not always what’s “traditionally” attractive!
*9. Describe your perfect mate*The way this is phrased squicks me out! 😫But idk! Like I said, it changes. I do tend to fall for passionate and sweet people. Like, the sort of people who really care. I also have a history of dating neurodivergent people! Most of my partners and crushes have been autistic, all have had some form of neurodivergency!
*12. Do you forgive betrayal?*I dunno! I can’t predict my brains behaviors. Sometimes someone does something Small and my brain is like “they’re dead to you” and other times people will seriously hurt me and it won’t change anything.
18. There isn’t one ;p
*21. Do you think someone has feelings for you?*Honestly? No idea. I feel like maybe but I also don’t rlly see anything loveable about myself. :/ People need to be Up Front about their feelings for me bc I’m Dense.
*27. Has anyone ever written a song or a poem for you?*
Yes!!! 3 times. First time, my ex-boyfriend Terry wrote me a poem. I’ve also had a verse in a song about me, and a whole lullaby written for me (by my partner). 💞
*32. Have you ever experienced unrequited love?*Binch that’s my life story!! Of course I have!! Every fuckin day!!
*36. Have you ever liked one of your best friends?*If we’re close, I’m a lil bit gay for u. If I’m gay for u, we’re probably best friends. They go hand in hand for me? I dunno I have trouble understanding platonic vs. romantic, my brain is just like “it love!!!”.
*42. How long can you just kiss untill your hands start to wander?*Usually I’ll ask verbal consent first! Sometimes I’ll get rlly into it, and (esp if I’m drunk) my hands wander, but the person usually just moves my hand and I apologise and things are A-OK. Ive had a 6-7 hour make out session w/ no hand wandering so! (That was…hard on my mouth lol)
*48. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say?*It happens a lot!! I either encourage them to pursue it, or I encourage them but ask them not to discuss it w/ me. Sometimes if I’m in the Bad Place I get shitty and distance myself or lash out a wee bit, which is… Not ok, but usually I’m good? I think.
*50. If your first true love ever knocked on your door with an apology and presents, would you accept?*Depends on who you mean! Idk who was my ~first true love~. My kindergarten crush? Probably not. My first partner? Maybe! My abuser? Nope!!!
*51. Is there a PERSON who you would do absolutely everything for?*…yeah? BPD!!! Ive had multiple. But there are a couple who remain consistent!
*69. What turns you off?*Homophobia/transphobia/racism/etc. Also, talking about past sexual partners? Like u can do it, it just makes me feel a bit jealous/squicky. Working on it tho!!
*77. What’s your opinion on age differences in relationships?*I def think they’re navigable to an extent, and I tend to be a bit lenient with it. The age range im willing to date is 18-23/24, but the 18 year old is rlly rare/they have to be like, super self-reliant and in college and stuff? And even then I’d tread carefully.I would also date an older couple, personally! Like if a pair if 28 y/o lesbians approached me as a couple I would def be interested? Idk why it seems Nice.
*81. Who are five people you find attractive?*Uhhh celebs or irl? I don’t wanna tag people I’m friends with bc trust me, they know how cute I think they are, but I’m having trouble thinking of five celebs? The only person who comes to mind rn is Alex Roberts (the tabletop personality) and she’s not even that famous! So idk 😫 I might come back to this once I’m more well rested.
84. *Why did your last relationship fail?*Just because it’s over doesn’t mean it failed. I don’t regret it at all and we knew going in it might not last forever. sounds cheesy but we both helped each other improve and I’m okay w/ it. *Shrugs*
Ty!! 💞💞
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