#this is not canon bc the dm would kill me. but god it is funny to visualise

[allthecastlesonclouds]

tell me about drawtectives. what is this little show.

oooooh my god oh my god. they are my guys. so.

drawtectives itself is a youtube series created by julia lepetit on Drawfee. it's an rpg mystery show– s1 is a murder mystery, s2 is just a mystery– that doubles as an art challenges show. she draws all of the backgrounds and npcs and most of the assets (the 'cutscenes', you could call them) and then the team gets together, knowing absolutely nothing besides what julia's asked them to prepare, and does some funky improv to create a very funky storyline.

there are 3 players and one dm; the pcs are rosé, york, and grendan/grenda/grandma/gma, and the Big NPCs are Jancy True (s1/s2) and Eugene Finch (s2) and they're, in their own words, a found family, so. beloved. their backup plan if all their jobs fail is to move out east and open a bookstore. jancy and eugene have fully accepted their titles as mom/ancestral ghost and son despite meeting each other likely once before the drawtectives dragged them together. overall though if i had to summarize, it's a bunch of friends getting together, making a bunch of puns, appreciating julia's art, and laughing together. the vibes are 10/10 so loving. in writing the transcripts i've written (Karina laughs) (Nathan laughs) (All laugh) So Many Times it's just fun.

so there's three pcs. first one we meet is gyorik 'york' rogdul, who's a half-orc come to the city to learn about his mother's culture. he is the character we have by far the most lore for– if I compiled all the lore I had about the Northern Tribes and Wild Trains, I think the document would be multiple pages. he's also illiterate, which was an interesting decision for the english major of the group to make (in other words, York Will Not Be Illiterate For Season Three bc Y'all Cannot Read) and morally gray if you think about it too hard (he killed his own brother) but yknow he's hot so it's okay. they're all hot any crimes committed are okay. he's also aroace (confirmed by the player, which is!! vibes!! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR TELLING ME @axolotllee!)

rosé is the Human Rogue and the youngest of the party; her main trait in s1 was Millennial and she Dealt with that. she, in contrast with York, has so little lore we are scraping the barrel. she was a thief, then left everything about that life behind and changed her name to rosé when she went to work for jancy. she lied on her resumé. she knows how to sew; she's sewn Pockets of Holding on most of her clothing. she bonded with a stray cat that lived outside her last apartment. she's three credits short of graduating college. she's, in addition to being a drawtective, jancy's intern, and cried when jancy got her a cupcake. she won't tell her best friends when her birthday is or where she goes to school or what her last name is. that's all we know about her and i love her and she could probably kill someone as she has multiple knives on her person and does not use them. she's bright and funny and can be pretty dark but really does find the humor in it which is. wonderful.

so grendan highforge starts out as The Snobby Rich Boy which. already love the trope something Always Happens To Them if they're a pc. then through s1 they make an offhand comment about a character (faucon, whose name is pronounced 'falco') and how if her name was pronounced that way it'd be grenda. faucon asks how they feel about it. they are caught very off-guard by that and then ask to be called it for the next hour or so. then the next witness calls him gma, and then grandma, and then. yeah she realizes she's genderfluid. and he uses any pronouns and has a full beard and also wears a romper and loves dogs and the player is the Most Experienced TTRPG-er so through maybe using resources a bittt grandma is the most observant character of all of them. he's also a dog walker and a lightweight and does canonically have druidic magic though that was Not Touched On Much and showed up to their first day on the job slightly stoned (they did stop doing that though.) she carries around a box to make the height difference (york is 7'. grendan is 4'. rosé is 6'. you can see the formatting issue) slightly less difficult. she doesn't know how rhinos reproduce but has had a fascination with them since a police chief said one might've committed a crime. i think they could kill someone by talking too much but they don't actually have the strength or dex to do Jack Shit.

and jancy true is the head pi (a great many of the characters are puns and i love it so much) and is there to make sure things get done and clues don't get missed. she has a cochlear implant and uses a cane and solved s1 just by Reading The Paper and hearsay. she solved about half of s2 before Someone Stopped Her. she says hello children to the drawtectives and it is such a fond thing. eugene is. a guy who i love. julia started the show thinking he would be some mysterious character to join them and then made the wonderful improv decision– avoiding having to do npc-npc conversation– of saying 'yeah eugene is spinning a camera on its stand' and rosé just says so gleefully. 'guys. i think he's stupid.' and he became their son. his character is a lot of The Plot of s2 so i don't want to get into it too much but. jancy and eugene my beloved.

they're just. such a family. to quote nathan (grenda's Player) from the s2 talkback: "That's one of my favorite things about this show, is we came in with these vague ideas for characters, and just playing them with each other, they became friends and became better people as a result of knowing each other and solving mysteries. ... Like, we all kind of independently made our characters people that either were distant from their families or, you know, just had tenuous connections to other stuff, and so these are, like, the realest connections they have in their lives."

and then karina (rosé) about 10 seconds later: "Yeah, we love a found family where they bond over just being the worst."

god. them. they're chaotic and loud and feel very real to me. they have excitement and are pretty bad at social cues but they love each other and want to die together because they would hate too much to be separated. i could articulate this better but it's one in the morning and they mean a great deal to me.

[candyradium]

gabriels infiltrator armour powered steps +5ft comes from the heelies he built into his boots

[bansheeoftheforest]

Well, my wifi is not back, and wont be anytime soon. The very earliest luckiest would be getting it back by Tuesday (unlikely). The very worst my house burns down so theres that /lh /hj

This sucks so much because I really cannot read asks I dont see in real time, I have the same amount of reading comprehension for them as I do Frankenstein XD

Dm me links to any important syndicate asks I miss while I'm gone 👍

-

Bannnnnn I tried to draw the Jekyll brothers but Kent? Is inconsistent? The database (what I use) showd him as a clean shaven guy with a bit messy hair but google is showing Kent as a completely different model? Neat hair, Brokenshire beard. Like it's the ingame "identify" zoom in and I cant check whats right before I already killed himmmm

Anyway here art <3. I know I said I'd draw the DTIYS first but art inspiration is stored in the Syndicate au <3

-

Also I've been thimking about Henry wearing a mask +plus ponytail to hide his identity like for the past two days. Yknow those theater masks? The weeping and laughing? He wears the sad one while in the Blighters and Templars and the happy one while in the Rooks because hes a dramatic theater nerd. Also! I like to think that if Jekyll has to be a templar he'd still wear the Blighter uniform when he could and pretend hes not high ranking. He gets away with it because Crawford doesn't care about him and Roth lives for chaos

I also drew Henry in a mask and ponytail but it's not done yet 😔

-

Also I did the math the the twins are 3 years older than Jekyll. Like thank goodness first of all because I fully went into ship entirely unaware on if there were canon ages or a scary difference. But also Jacob being 3 years older than Henry is kinda funny to me

-

All of Evie's outfits (besides her default) are bad and I'm gonna fist fight the designers because the secrets of london (where I only searched the locations of 3) is so bad, especially with the effort needed. How did they do Jacob so good, but utterly fail with Evie /lh

NOOOOOOO D: Man, I really hope you will get it back asap, and also that your house don't burn down!!

Man, if I don't know your struggle rn. However I shall do my best to link you to every syndicate ask that I will get from here on out bc I don't tend to get small asks for that au so <3

--

Huh-- oh wow you're right. I wonder if it is a set design or just a bit on random depending on the save file... I killed him a long ass time ago so I have absolutely no idea how he looked like <3

EITHER WAY OH MY GOD IT LOOKS AAMZING. I love??? How you gave all three individual personalities in just a single picture??? Kent looks like he is seconds away from murder and I LOVE Henry in the templar outfit, it fits him so well??? Man I really want to start thinking more of this branch. Would the entire Jekyll family be Templars so the trio got that role inherited? Are Raphael and Kent unidentical twins and Henry is the odd-one-out because he is the youngest? Were the three of them really close in Scotland, but left as soon as possible bc their family was abusive, only for Kent and Raphael to find refuge in the Templar Order while Henry goes to university? Would they still have that brotherly love if they were close as kids even when they are in the Order, or would they have a falling out and start despising each other (or Jekyll @ the older brothers at least)? Would Raphael and Kent secretly be protective of Henry and manage to keep him out of Starrick's line-of-sight so that Henry won't get in trouble for defying orders/ignoring them? Would they force Henry to join the Templars with threats or would Henry mostly feel obligated to join them? Since the Templar Order isn't illegal in London, would other people know that Jekyll is a Templar, or would he keep it hidden from the public? Would his brothers help hide his identity?? SO many questions and I'm so sad I won't be able to discuss them with you :'c

(also can I just say I love the poetic differences between their clothing. Raphael is just wearing a waistcoat/basic clothes and he is a brute and more open, Kent is wearing more clothes/layering up and he is the "brains" out of the two of them, Jekyll is wearing the most layers and is almost trying to hide himself and I just... *chief's kiss*)

--

Henry being a dramatic theater nerd and stealing Roth's costume supplies to hide his identity bc he is so ashamed of it and doesn't want people he knows to know about it my beloved <3 Plus the blighter uniforms doesn't look too far off of what he normally wears so he could probably use that as an excuse whenever some other Templar gets up his ass about not wearing the right clothes, yet it still doesn't make Henry feel any better knowing he has to bear the knowledge that he is actively wearing discreet blighter clothes to keep the Order happy and the public oblivious, knowing what cause he is reluctantly supporting. (him joining the rooks and suddenly coming into the Society all dressed in green lol)

Anyways I have now also decided that Maxwell and Henry are friends bc they both hate the Templars and Crawford and Henry gets to star in many of the plays he sets up. Plus they are both slightly insane so they match each other good.

YKNOW WHAT I WAS DAYDREAMING ABOUT WHILE BRUSHING MY TEETH RIGHT AFTER THIS ASK? Jekyll being forced to be the one to murder his brothers and the twins trying to track the murderer down just to know who tf are killing their targets, conveniently at the same time Maxwell starts meeting Jacob. Henry watching Jacob from afar getting smitten by him but keeping a distance bc he knows Maxwell is possessive, Jacob being the first to befriend Henry after Maxwell explains that both of them are against the Templars and Crawford, Jacob saving Henry during the fire of the theater? Yes pls <3

--

Thank god bc here I was imagining an age gap of like idk 15 years bc of the differences in the timeline but! I'm just going to keep the canonical age difference while also shoot the timeline up a lil so that the events of Syndicate and TGS takes place at the same time but they are the right age and stuff, just bc I do not like Evie's and Jacob's older designs and I do not want to imagine them meeting during the Ripper dlc <3 Also the thought of Jacob being older than Henry is funny. I think Henry has a type /j

-

They are so fucking bad and I'm going to scourage the Nexus to see if I can find any good redesign mods because they are so fucking bad. But to be fair, all female main characters' outfits are bad. Pearl? Lucy Thorne? Mfs looks like vampires. Even more reasons for why I only play Jacob, bc all other outfits on Evie are bad <3

[rahleeyah]

So the character I play in dnd is chaotic neutral. This means she's basically a wildcard, not evil but too inclined to serving her own interests to be lawful. Her main goals in life are a) don't die b) get money c) get laid. She's a cleric in service to the goddess of the sea, who in this canon is evil, so she's basically Asha Greyjoy, except she's so so stupid (I have had several crit fails that have led to me getting a concussion and almost drowning while trying to be sneaky, one that led to me accidentally breaking our strongest character's nose, several mishaps with some ball bearings....anyway). One of the great things about Key, apart from the fact that she's a disaster lesbian/pirate, is that she is always the one suggesting we don't do the thing. How about we don't try to attack a fortress filled with tabaxi when there's God only knows how many of them and only four of us and they have the high ground? Why don't we stay home and get drunk? Of course we have to do the thing or else there would be no game, but it's a nice way to reinforce the urgency of our mission, when the team has to find arguments to convince Key that they have to go do the thing. It reminds us all why we're doing what we're doing. Key has some kickass high damage spells and is also the party's (reluctant) healer, so they don't want to leave her behind.

But being the wildcard is a constant source of delight for me. One of the most fun things about dnd, apart from hanging out with my friends, is that we're telling a story. At the beginning of our last session, Key had received a note and a visit from her mysterious girlfriend. The underground anti government organization Key joined (mostly bc they offered her an absurd amount of money as a signing bonus) wanted her to remove the mayor of the town where our party had set up shop.

No one else knew she'd received the note, and we had a mission to start the next day. So when the session started, the other three players were waking up, getting ready to pack up and go on an adventure. The DM clearly expeted us to go on the next set up for a battle. But when it came my turn I said, "is there a way for Key to sneak out of the house?"

Everything stops. The DM says, reluctantly, "there's the secret tunnel-" cue the chorus of people suddenly singing SECRET TUNNEL.

I didn't do great on my stealth check but I got out of the house and went to the mayor. Unbeknownst to my friends I am swimming in gold, and the DM at our last session had been a little tipsy and riffing while he voiced the mayor and said some funny line about the guy using drugs. So Key wakes up the mayor, tells him he's about to booted out of office for his drug use, and offers him an outrageous amount of money to leave town before his reputation is ruined. The DM, playing the mayor now, is flabbergasted. But I rolled a nat 20 on my persuasion check and the mother fucker bought it. He left town that day.

Which! Through a fluke none of us expected, meant that one member of our party was now the de facto mayor of our town. And while we had a job to do, the town was under threat of attack by a dragon and was actually in the middle of evacuating to that fortress we'd recently rid of the tabaxi. Our new lawful good mayor could hardly leave her people to evacuate on their own!

And so just like that the whole angle of the game changed. Key is working for a terrorist organization, and when she was forced to reveal the truth of her involvement in the plot to remove the mayor her friends learned that she does have her own moral code. She didn't kill the guy, even though that was plainly what her people expected. She made sure he'd be safe, that he'd have a chance of a good life. And she did it because her girlfriend told her he was an unjust ruler, and the one thing Key hates more than losing her money is a tyrant. Even tho Key recognizes that Tro becoming the mayor isn't great for the party, it gives her a chance to point out that bc Tro is pure of heart and uninterested in power she'll make for a good ruler, in the short term. Key has, according to her own code, done a good thing. That was a huge moment for her character and her relationship with her team.

And honestly it was so much fun to play. I got to surprise my friends, who hadn't known I had any of this planned and didn't expect the story to go this way, and Key got to grow a little bit, and now Tro is the fucking mayor!! The whole story changed because Key snuck out of the house, to save the mayor before her organization killed him.

And I can't wait for next week.

[octopus-defence-squad]

you asked for hbomb lore and i am here

so the thing about h lore is that it’s 90% headcanons and expansions of the little we have. it has been over 100 days since the last time h streamed lore, which was the second stream he did which would be considered lore.

that is not to say there is no h lore, however. between the lost vod (rip) and new beginnings—plus general stuff that has not been in his streams—we have a bit, and h fans are not just relying on him.

c!hbomb mainly wants friends. even before he moved out thousands of blocks from everyone, he was a lonely man. most people forgot he existed, and the way everyone was so casually cruel to each other on the server broke him down.

he joined on the day the election results were announced, the day schlatt exiled tommy and wilbur from lmanburg and all that shit started. he lived in a room in eret’s castle, avoiding all the conflicts he did not understand and attempting to befriend anyone he could meet. he made an area with mini games and challenges to try and encourage visitors, and set up lcast to get to know people better

people would walk through his room and steal his things without a second thought, often referring to his things as eret’s, which they weren’t. even still, he didn’t really get upset with people over it. he showed up at every major event (minus the manburg festival) and was a jovial presence in the background, making stupid jokes and small talk with other non-important people. on november 16th, he showed up with the goal of watching people die bc he found it funny, stayed a neutral party until the withers were released, and ended up helping to kill some of them. afterwards, he assisted in rebuilding new lmanburg and had a lot of fun talking with everyone, despite not living there.

in the aftermath of the green festival and right before doomsday (the lost vod) he talked at length about how lost he felt and how powerless he was. he and niki decided that they can’t stand against techno and dream, and that other than during og l’manburg days, that time rebuilding after november 16th was the best time on the server because everyone gathered over the wreakage and worked to rebuild. he is selfish and questions why chat keeps asking him to go against Dream, a literal god on the server, and technoblade, a pvp legend, with only 3 lives in order to defend a place he has never lived, that never treated him well.

good quotes include: “who on this server is considered good? i went into that place the only person without armor yesterday because i expected to die” “i’m on the side of logic and none of this makes sense!” and “i say we let dream and techno have their little power trip and then rebuild it and make it better again”

this vod is lost bc h watched animatics after this bit (i think). however, i have found two videos that have most of the important parts (PLEASE IF PEOPLE HAVE MORE DM ME OR TAG ME I AM DYING).

by himself/recap

talking with niki

the next time he returns to the server, it is a week after doomsday. called “New Beginnings” this is the last lore stream he has done. in it, he and niki discuss what happened and go over their new plans. h expresses how bad he feels, and tells niki his plans to leave and start over. he gives her everything he owns and clears out the room in eret’s castle he had been living in since joining the server.

together with niki, he goes across the nether roof until he is far from any other portals and any other smp members. they find a savanna village and h begins to set up a home there. he has not permanently returned to the smp since.

he joined puffy (who he was knighted with by eret after then-Mexican Lmanburg protested eret’s return to the throne) and others in locking dream up in Pandora’s Vault, and returns to the main smp lands occasionally to help niki or do lcast. most people don’t visit him in his base, and according to a dubiously canon stream, h has developed an alcohol problem to cope with his feelings of loneliness and abandonment.

idk what the point is, but ig you could also say thevir is canon, so for a brief bit he body swapped with a horny blue tiefling named thevir, aka cc!hbomb’s dnd character from the streamee dnd campaign.

h has lore and that’s the best summary i have, hope this helped!

Hot take about the dream smp: I kinda want Hbomb lore. There probably is some lore that I just don’t know about, but like I want lore where it lures us in like the other members of the smp. Maybe a cool backstory or something. Maybe him reacting to Wilbur being revived or something. TL;DR: I lust for lore of Hbomb

[hoodwinkedtoohoodvsevil]

OKAY i have so much to say about dm3 so here’s my #Thoughts (spoilers) IT’S REALLY REALLY LONG

tl;dr i loved it bc of course i did but if you want my spicy feelse it’s below the cut

OKAY i’m basically doin this off the cuff scene by scene from memory (i’ve seen it twice) but also touching on just. aspects of the movie as i think of them.

i’m gonna start by saying what everyone knows but idc i’ll say it until the end of time: I LOVE FELONIUS GRU SO MUCH OHHH MY GOD HIS EXISTENCE MAKES MY LIFE GOOD

ALSO!!!! RLY MAD AT THE MARKETING OF THIS MOVIE BC IT COMPLETELY /LIES/ ABOUT GRU’S INTENTIONS!!! HE HAS NO INTENTIONS OF GOING BACK TO VILLAINY AT ALL THROUGHOUT THE MOVIE HIS ENTIRE PLAN IS TO STEAL THE DIAMOND BACK FROM BALTHAZAR TO GET HIS+LUCY’S JOBS BACK SO BASICALLY GRU IS PERFECT 

oky so i thought the movie was RLY GOOD it basically does everything good that the first two movies do. the girls are in this more than 2 which is a big improvement. 2 may always be my favorite just bc it’s mostly abt grucy but 2 has the biggest flaw of them all (it’s fuckin racist as hell) so at least dm3 isn’t as...flawed.

it’s main problem is that it’s got a looot goin on, which is kinda common for sequels (especially third movies onward) bc they gotta give existing characters that everyone knows/likes plots/development while also establishing/developing new characters. i don’t really mind this so much bc i like all the characters in this movie a lot. i do like some plots/subplots more than others but i personally was never like. overwhelmed. the only subplot i didn’t rly care about was the minions one but i’ll talk abt that later. it’s not terrible tho.

MY main problem (basically the only thing that bothers me when i watch the movie) is how soooo fast paced it is. like, i get that the other movies kind of are too, but i can think of multiple parts of this movie where it just would’ve been better to just. let stuff sit? like okay, i have some examples that i’ll address when i get to them.

okay actually goin scene by scene now

first scene is good it’s basically just the first trailer but longer. i’ve said this before but i had the clownfish part it’s the worst part of the whole movie. but at least it’s only like two seconds. agents grucy is still my reason for existence and i’m kinda salty they never called back to that but i’m still blessed. balthazar is honestly so fuckin funny and Truthfully i liked the part when he blasts (naked) gru away with his keytar way better in the actual movie than in the trailer bc playing jump by van halen during that part was fucking HYSTERICAL.

gru...is so fucking funny and extra. “i don’t want to waste another breath on him. AND ANOTHER THING!!!” honey please chill. also “you’re making me nervous” BABY NO

okaaay buuuuuut the scene after they get fired slays me. “honey, you didn’t have to do that, i know how much you love your job” “well, there are some things i love more” LITERALLY MURDER MY ASS GRUCY IS MY REASON FOR LIVING

also catch my ass overanalyzing what gru says and tracing it back to lucy’s backstory (her parents were killed by supervillains when she was very young for those who don’t spend their free time researching everything about dm canon). she didn’t just love her job bc it was fun, it had significant meaning to her and just. excuse me I’M NOT CRYIN

“we should really tell the girls...can you do it?” girl same

the luau scene isn’t new to me so i don’t have much to say except that I Love My Daughters More Than Life Itself.

OKAY OKAY BUT here’s an example of the too fast paced parts i’m talkin about. when gru tells the girls that he and lucy lost their jobs, i read the jr novel before i saw the movie and i thought that part would be/should’ve been slower. like when he goes “lucy and i were invited to...not work at the avl anymore.” like? it just felt like he’d be a little more hesitant when telling him. just felt like it should’ve had a tiny bit more weight to it.

also “and let’s NOT go to katie’s house anymore.”

listen. i don’t hate the minions catch my ass defending them most of the time but i’m so salty at them in this movie. i get that their purpose is to serve the baddest villain but they’ve been with gru for like 45 YEARS THEY’RE SUPPOSED TO BE LIKE FAMILY!!!!! aso gru has been away from villainy for like more than a year so can they just chill please. these minions ain’t loyal.

I KNEW DR. NEFARIO WAS GONNA BE FROZEN IN CARBONITE BC JR NOVEL BUT I DIDN’T REALIZE HE WAS GONNA BE IN THE EXACT SAME POSE AS HAN SOLO SO I LOST MY SHIT. AND WE NEVER SEE HIM GET UNFROZEN SO IS HE LIKE GONE FOREVER? RIP I GUESS

the take on me scene was soooo goddamn funny

lucy comforting gru saved my life. that scene was actually well paced it wasn’t rushed but it didn’t go on longer than it needed to. a+ scene.

i knew from the trailers that agnes was gonna sell her unicorn but i didn’t know she was gonna look so SAD WHEN SHE DID IT THAT DESTROYED ME

uhhh skippin a few scenes bc whatever. stuff we know from trailers. OH OH but “YOU TOLD ME MY DAD DIED OF DISAPPOINTMENT WHEN I WAS BORN” WHAT THE FUUUUUCK I LAUGHED BUT GOD WHY IS SHE SO MEAN

lucy on the plane tryin to engage with the girls. i’m so sad pls just let her feel like a mom.

gru’s private part

the first scene in dru’s house reminded me that illumination’s lighting is always KILLER that scene was so beautifully lit 

DRUUUU INTERACTING WITH THE GIRLS WAS HONESTLY SOOO CUTE?? esp the part with agnes it just felt like genuine kid dialogue. i love. and “SHE’S 12 SHE LOOKS 12 AND SHE WILL ALWAYS BE 12�� oh honey (but same)

OKAY the most bothered i was by the pacing in this movie was when gru was like “lucy can i get a fuckin uhhhh leave i feel like garb” and lucy was like “honey just deal”. that’s another part i read in the jr novel and thought would have more. emotion to it. like it didn’t need to be heavy or anything but i remember feeling really sad when i read gru say “i feel worse than i did when i came here” but in the movie it just kinda flew by? ESPECIALLY bc lucy was immediately like “well, he’s your brother just try to get along with him”. like, okay, you just had a scene of gru venting to lucy about feeling like a failure so you’d think if she found out meeting dru made gru feel worse she’d be like “oh no i’m sorry this isn’t what you were expecting and you feel even worse now” like she doesn’t need to say any of that but even just. a pause and a facial expression can say a lot. just a look of sympathy and then trying to cheer him up or be more optimistic like “well he is your brother and you were so excited to meet him and you only just met like you might eventually be glad you did this” that kinda thing. it was just sooo rushed it felt like nothing when it should’ve felt like Something bc lucy knows gru’s been feeling bad and just. a little sympathy would’ve been nice and still could’ve led to the same conclusion. but shit we gotta save time for the minions musical number i guess.

speaking of that i’m just gonna talk about that subplot in one bullet point. it was the one i cared about the least and had nothing to do with anything really. i’ll admit the singing part is kinda funny bc idk what it is but they always have good song choices for when the minions sing. like make em laugh in the minions movie and now modern major general like yeah those are minion songs yknow. and okay it is kinda funny when they’re in prison bc they just IMMEDIATELY show them and they’re like runnin the place. i figured there’d be some kinda transition but nope they get there and they rule the prison. also the first class/coach separation in the plane was funny but i have to wonder what dictates whether a minion ends in first class or coach. but yeah like i said i don’t really caaaaare and i’m salty over the minions leavin gru anyway so fuck em.

OH OH OH BUT THE PART WHERE MEL MISSES GRU AND IS REMEMBERING GOOD TIMES WITH HIM LITERALLY MADE ME CRY GRU IS SUCH AN ANGEL!!!!! THAT WAS ONE OF MY FAVE SCENES

okay rest of the movie. god this is so long i’m so sorry but i have SO MUCH TO SAY.

i don’t have much to say abt the scenes with gru and dru except i like them and i like their interactions. i didn’t think i’d like dru as much as i did  tho i do see how people could find him annoying. i guess i’m just like. well i’m lucy and he’s part of my family so yes i love him.

“gettin my sea legs, matey” meeeeeee

SAD LITTLE BOOTS WAS SOOOO FUNNY

BAR NONE THE FUNNIEST AND JUST MOST CHARMING SCENE IN THE WHOLE MOVIE WAS GRU AND DRU PRETENDING TO BE EACH OTHER. everything about that scene gives me life. it was sooo genuine and natural like when they couldn’t keep it up and just burst out laughing. they’re adorable i love my husband and my brother-in-law they’re such children. i just love that it was gru’s idea bc you know when he was thinkin about twin stuff on the plane ride there he was like ‘omg what if we switched places and pretended to be each other to fool ppl omg that’s a twin thing’ but it was so obvious bc kids can get away with that but they’re in their fuckin 50s you fools.

THAT REMINDS ME steve carell was honestly so good in this movie. like he’s always good as gru but he was rly good as dru too like obviously they sounded similar but i was never watching it and thinking “oh this is steve carell talking to himself” like he voiced both characters well and obvs they had different personalities and that rly came through and just. i love you sexy grey hair steve carell.

scene with gru and agnes was so damn pure just. everything i want out of a scene with gru and agnes. thank u illumination for my life.

gonna talk abt the agnes subplot in one bullet point bc there’s not much to it. basically i love my daughter, she’s an angel, and i like that we just. have a goat now. also another animation highlight in the scene where she and edith are in the forest looking for the unicorn. that forest was gorgeous. and again, beautifully lit.

lucy defending margo REPLENISHED MY ELECTROLYTES 

also when she was like “i gotta tell gru!” so precious omg i wish we could’ve seen her tell him about it that would’ve been so cute. 

love the scene of gru and dru sneakin into balthzar’s lair. good stuff. I DIE WHEN DRU WAS FREAKIN OUT IN THE VENT AND GRU WAS LIKE “hey relax :) it’s gonna be fine :) i got your back” I WANTED TO SCREAM WHY IS GRU SO PERFECT

i don’t ship druthazar (sorry dm fandom) but i still leaned over to david when dru was sitting on balthzar’s bed and i whispered “that’s not the last time he was in balthzar’s bed” bc i‘m funny

AND THE BEST PART IS YOU’LL NEVER :) EVER >:( DO ANYTHING BEHIND MY BACK EVER AGAIN >:(( RIGHT HONEYBEAR? :)))

sometimes you want a unicorn. but you just get a goat.

i was ready to declare the part where lucy comes in just loudly singing and then goes “you’ve been a baaad boy gru” and smacks his face my favorite lucy scene in the whole movie but the it was balthazar disguised as lucy and i’ve never felt more betrayed

also how did balthazar perfectly mimic lucy’s voice? when he was disguised as the museum guy it was clearly trey parker doing another south park voice but WHATEVER

while i’m thinkin abt it trey parker was fine as balthazar i guess like he was funny but i used to watch a looot of south park so i would so often just her the south park in his voice and i was like Alright

THE CLIMAX OF THIS MOVIE MURDERED MY ASS!!!!! i looooove this movie’s climax it’s easily the best of the dm franchise. i never wanted to murder balthazar with my bare hands more than when he left the girls for dead and tried to kill an unconscious gru with a giant lazer. i was SHOOKETH. lucy jumpin across the giant bubble gum...balls or whatever to save the girls was the BEST SHIT. dru saving gru was so good i’m so proud of him...love my brother-in-law. and the dance fight with gru and balthazar SAVED!!! CINEMA!!! i was screamin oh my god..i know y’all know i love gru with everything i am but y’all he’s SO GOOD IN THE CLIMAX OF THIS MOVIE

as lucy wilde, i can confirm that after i ran up and hugged gru i was covering his face with red lipstick and also being like “balthazar’s dead right? like not just caught, fucking DEAD? RIGHT??” he either lied to assuage me or I Found A Way

AGNES SAYING “love you mom” TO LUCY AND LUCY BEING LIKE “i’m a mom!!” KILLED WHATEVER WAS LEFT OF MY SOUL!!!!!

tho tho tho i’m still UPSET that the girls call gru by his name and not dad...like you gonna call lucy mom WHEN U GONNA CALL GRU DAD I’M GASPING FOR AIR

lucy was very dtf at the end she was like gru say good night to your brother and let’s go FUCK (and then dru had to go and interrupt it smh)

i was like UMMMMM at first when watching the very last scene but then when i saw how gru and lucy reacted to it i was like okay i accept this. he better have just been staying temporarily at their house and going back to freedonia soon tho bc i don’t think lucy would like the idea of a supervillain living her house.

gru n lucy gettin ready to go in for the kill. love it. love them forever.

trey parker’s singing in hug me (the credits song) sounds too much like andy partridge of xtc and like 0 people reading this (if anyone’s still reading oh my god) are gonna know what i’m talking about but it makes it quite the Experience whenever i listen to it

speaking of this is the best soundtrack out of dm 1-3 i’ve been listening to it the whole time writing this

SO IN SUMMARY hi i’m lucy wilde, and my husband and daughters are absolutely everything to me. as a viewer balthazar is the most entertaining dm villain bar none (overkills excluded obvs), but as lucy wilde i hope he fucking dies for trying to kill my family. dru is a good brother-in-law and is also a gay icon. this movie came out in pride month for a reason. dru (a gay male) and lucy (a pan woman) are true mlm/wlw solidarity.

i’m fuckin.

i love.

[trigoon]

Pick your top ten ships without looking at the questions

1. Josuke/Okuyasu (JJBA)

2. Jotaro /Kakyion (JJBA)

3. Joseph/Caesar(JJBA)

4. Vash /Wolfwood (Trigun)

5. Yuri /Victor (Yuri!!! on ice)

6. Spiderman/Deadpool (Marvel Comics)

7. Lance/Keith (Voltron: LD)

8. Sole survivor/Hancock (idk if this really counts but, Fallout 4)

9. Keith/Shiro (Voltron LD)

10. Dio/Johnathan (JJBA again)

lmao as you can see I am Jojo trash, and these are in somewhat of a random order

1.    Do you remember the episode/scene/chapter that you first started shipping 6?

I think it was after I started reading the Spiderman/Deadpool comics that I realized they were the perfect power couple. I mean at first I thought people just shipped them because they looked alike, now I understand.

2.    Have you ever read a FanFiction about 2?

Yap, yap, yap. But I haven’t found any really good ones that are longer, if you know some dm me.

3.    Has a picture of 4 ever been your screen saver/profile picture/tumblr avatar?

My computer wallpaper was the picture of them on the couch for the longest fucking time, and idk why because that scene always made me cry. But idk about profile pic or anything like that.

4.    If 7 were to suddenly break up today, what would your reaction be?

If they got together I would be bouncing off of the walls for months, so if they broke up I would probably delete all of my social media and just live an isolated life.

5.    Why is 1 so important?

Because it would be the straightest gay relationship ever, and it would be so pure. It would go something like “Hey bro, no homo but your eyes are really sparkling today.” “dude we’ve been dating for three months now”. Also they are very good boys, that’s why it is so important.

6.    Is 9 a funny ship or a serious ship?

Their relationship would probably be serious, but as for how I feel about them I am not a serious shipper of the two, if that makes sense? I appreciate the fan art but for the love of god if you are serious about this ship in the Voltron fandom some SJW will sweep down and tell you that you're being a pedophile and should burn in hell.

7.    Out of all of your ships listed, which ship has the most chemistry?

Probably,  Sole Survivor/Hancock because for there to be a relationship there literally has to be chemistry (Chems). All jokes aside probably also  Josuke/Okuyasu and  Yuri /Victor, because they just push each other to be better people :’)

8.    Out of all of the ships, which ship has the strongest bond? 

(spoiler)

My brain wants me to say Yuri/Victor but my heart wants me to say Joseph/Caesar and Vash/Wolfwood BECAUSE THEY’RE BEST BUDS THAT KINDA HATED EACH OTHER AT FIRST BUT THEN THEY FOUGHT A BUNCH OF BAD GUYS TOGETHER AND ONE OF THEM DIES.

9.    How many times have you read/watched 10’s fandom?

Lmao I’ve watched all of the current anime twice and I’m reading through the manga right now, I’m almost done with part 5. (Including rereading part 5 again with a friend)

10.  Which ship has lasted the longest?

lol I guess the only one that's canon, Yuri/Victor

11.  How many times, if ever, has 6 broken up?

Well they got to get together first (I’m looking at you marvel)

12.  If the world was suddenly thrust into a zombie apocalypse, which ship would make it out alive, 2 or 8?

Um, 8? They already live in the apocalypse. But omg I would love to see Jotaro and Kak murder some fucking zombies

13.  Did 7 ever have to hide their relationship for any reason?

(if they ever did get together) I could see them hiding it

14.  Is 4 still together?

:’) No, because even if they were together one of them be dead :’)

15.  Is 10 canon?

Well they do have a son together, and they ARE together if you know what I mean ;)

16.  If all ten ships were put into a couple’s Hunger Games, which couple would win?

THIS IS A HARD ONE. I feel like it would narrow down to the JJBA ships but at the same time Stand user vs Gun? Who would really win? For the sake of making this easy I'm going to narrow it down to just the JJBA ships (1,2,3,10) and rule them out from there. If we’re talking young Joseph and Caesar vs everyone else then, while Joseph did kill a god, I feel like they would lose bc Caesars power is fucking bubbles and they don’t have stands so:/ Then I feel like the next to die off would be Dio and Johnathan because 1) Dio is a vampire and if it is day time then boom, he dies. 2)While Johnathan is a Big Boy ™ and very strong, I don’t think he can kill a stand user with just hamon. Now were down to Jotaro/Kakyion and Josuke/Okuyasu. JotaKak is much smarter and much more cunning, but I am assuming this is part 3, Jotaro cannot stop time and the best Kak can do is 20 meter Emerald splash.  But right away Josuke can heal and has almost the same strength as Jotaro, and for Okuyasu while he is stupid his stand is overpowered. So I would have to say Josuke/Okuyasu, sorry I  had to make this question difficult. 

17.  Has anybody ever tried to sabotage 5’s ship?

There could be an argument to be made here that people have, but I’m just gonna say no (unless you want to count the gold medal)

18.  Which ship would you defend to the death and beyond?

I want to say Victor and Yuri but they have enough people defending them so I’m gonna say VashWoods because it is in my top 3 favorite ships

19.  Do you spend hours a day going through 3’s tumblr page?

I probably have lol (Joseph/Caesar)

20.  If an evil witch descended from the sky and told you that you had to pick one of the ten ships to break up forever or else she’d break them all up forever, which ship would you sink?

Keith/Shiro because I already got Keith in another ship 

I was tagged by @lenniefrost  

and I nominate @vashtheneedlenoggin