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sarahreesbrennan · 1 month ago

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Another Interesting Spoilery Evil Question

To directly answer the question before I start rambling, the Cobra’s body’s physical age is 24.

(You can stop reading here if you like. This gets very long!)

When Marius meets the Cobra (chapter 18 epigraph from Time of Iron) he correctly identifies him as Marius’s own age at the time - 18.

At the time of the book all the physical bodies’ ages are as follows.

Marius - 24

The Cobra - 24

Rahela - 24

Octavian - 24

(Pio and Nemeth, Octavian’s advisers, are in their early 40s and late 50s respectively - they’re Octavian’s dad’s people and that is part of why they are so stressed. Their king died young, Octavian became king in his teens and it has been an uneasy court ever since.)

Emer - 23

Key - 20

Lia - 19

Rae and Eric in our world were both 4 years younger than their bodies in this world (so they would both be 20 if the story hadn’t happened to them). For the moment we’ll leave aside Key, who had another life too, in a different way. (He was a little kid, but old enough to walk after his father, in the epigraph from Time of Iron in chapter 15.)

I do age shenanigans for two reasons.

—One is that age in fiction and reality is weird, and I wanted to portray that. If I had a crush on Mr Darcy when I was 7, is that okay? If I had a crush on Mr Darcy when aged 41, is that okay? Mr Darcy’s always in his late twenties: Elizabeth Bennet will never be older than 21, but she seemed so glamorous and all-knowing to me when I was a kid.

And if you walk into a story, when in their character development do you find them? Would we like Darcy when he’s sneering at Elizabeth at a ball? Who is it that we love and when?

Plenty of adult women fancied Edward Cullen, perpetually a teen (or was he? Fantasy and horror also open up the possibility of immortality - but in a way, all fictional characters are immortal. Holden Caulfield isn’t growing up any more than Edward Cullen is. And like fictional characters and immortals, the dead aren’t getting any older either—I think often of Anne Rice, author of the Vampire Chronicles, who wrote the doomed child vampire Claudia after losing her own daughter Michele as a child. Death, immortality, fiction and the overlap!) When I read or watched stories in which characters were in different/changed bodies they usually seemed younger - often their younger selves, or a younger/cuter body (Peggy Sue Got Married, Scarlet Heart). (Exceptions exist of course, e.g. Howl’s Moving Castle.) And I like magic losing something, costing you something, plus I’m a contrarian. So I wanted them older.

—The other is that LONG LIVE EVIL is a story about trauma, which often arrests your age in your mind. The period in which you were enduring the horrors is a blank in which you couldn’t develop normally, or in which you had plenty of experiences but few of them match with your peers’.

Cancer did it to me, which wasn’t horrendous as I was in my early 30s and that’s still adult, just meant a bit of ‘oh no I’m not this child’s mother, I’m too young - actually I’m a bit old to be this child’s mother now I think about it, but anyway I don’t claim her’ and the like. But I’ve seen it do the same for people with cancer I befriended or whom I mentor, and it’s a very different proposition if the lost years are 17-21.

It’s not just cancer, I’ve seen bereavement work that way on people, and apparently celebrity works on the mind like trauma and arrests you at the age you became famous in a lot of ways. It’s being taken out of the run of ordinary life, walking through your portal into strangeness.

But in the end most of us wind up with years that feel lost, I think, and playing catch-up is the only way forward.

And allegory remains allegory: if I’m writing a werewolf I’m taking about rage and body horror, sure, but I’m also talking about werewolves.

I was actually confused by this ask at first as I’d written a whole section where Eric says he’s going to die of a heart attack at 20 and Marius is exasperated as Eric is a little young to start lying about his age! But it must have fallen victim to my many cuts - stories transform! - and I can see why, because I don’t think Eric exactly thinks of himself as 20 anymore.

I had some struggles with the age stuff, it’s another layer of complication in a complicated story and there were worries raised that it was unnecessary and might make some characters less appealing but in the end I decided it was necessary to me and let the characters be unappealing, then.

I also enjoy the twisting, fluid ages because they cause conflict, and conflict is story.

Rae uses her new age (and thus doesn’t need to think of her absolutely horrible self worth) to count herself out as a romantic option in Key’s eyes.

She also thinks of the Emperor as in his mid-20s, as he is - after a time skip that happens in the original Time of Iron, years in which Key and Emer were Lia’s servants. She knows about those years, but she doesn’t put it together.

At Eric and Marius’s first meeting 6 years before the events of LONG LIVE EVIL, Eric also hasn’t been in the book that long. He was in a horrifically traumatic survival situation for a large part of the time he was inside, when he approached Marius to blackmail him. That is objectively a deranged thing to do, but Eric is thinking like a terrified 14 year old and also like a Huge Fan of Marius. aka the quintessential white knight, the Last Hope who is reserved and dignified and crucially, 24-28.

That would be the Marius Eric at the time knows when he approaches Marius in the flesh, Marius at 18 and coming off family trauma, friend trauma and quasi-romantic trauma himself. Marius actually DOES go into dissociative states and kill people, Eric was taking a huge risk with his own life that not a single person in the country would have taken. Marius is a Valerius, and they are killers. (The whole court, Marius included, thought Lady Katalin ((Rahela’s mother)) was being very daring by like, touching Marius’s hand when he was 17.)

Eric is acting wild partly because a) he is wild, b) he’s desperate but also crucially c) he’s thinking of Marius as someone that Marius isn’t yet and d) he’s not thinking of things from Marius’s POV, and doesn’t until the events of LONG LIVE EVIL. Their quasi friendship/quasi hostage situation (that the hostage had firmly decided was happening) couldn’t have happened without a perfect storm of weirdness, risks and lack of understanding what the hell was going on.

Marius would not have seen a 14 year old Eric (not a child to him exactly, but squire age rather than knight age) as a criminal threat in the same way as he saw the Cobra, his own age (18, which was definitely very adult, Marius thought at the time). Eric wouldn’t have failed to consider consequences or failed to consider Marius as person rather than character, if he’d actually been 18. But by the time anyone knew better, a status quo was established, and habit is second nature and a stronger nature than the first.

Eric’s plight is horrific initially. But at the same time, Eric is extremely intelligent (both intellectually and emotionally) and able to both cover and play catch-up to this new life, and he can advise Rae with the benefit of his experience - but that doesn’t mean that he didn’t screw up massively when he first came into the book, or that he doesn’t still have many things to work through.

Similarly, Emer is used to Rahela who is quasi older sister and quasi mistress, while Rae is now acting younger. And all of them are dealing with a gross system in which men are seen as in their youthful prime when women the same age are getting long in the tooth and can be traded in for teenagers - so even two people who are the same age aren’t treated as if they’re the same age, if they’re different genders. Age stuff is crunchy!

Also, while Emer thinks of Lia as having all the power due to class, Lia looks on someone who was her glamorous older stepsister’s age mate and went off to the big city years ago rather differently. But then, are adulthood and childhood different worlds? Is being in different social classes being in different worlds?

Can we reach the different universes of other people is something I’m always asking, I think.

THIS IS SO LONG. I AM SO SORRY.

#long live evil #pride and prejudice #twilight #ageism #portal fantasy #the golden cobra #marius valerius #emer ni domitia #king octavian #Rae parilla #key of the cauldron #Lia felice #prime minister pio #lle spoilers

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slashtakemylife · 11 months ago

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Peggy lives under the shadow of Steve, even when she's the main lead

With the release of What If and Peggy Carter taking on the role of Captain America, Marvel is very likely patting their back on their "feminism" and how they've given us a badass female leader that can have her own spotlight however it's very easy to see how we are still seeing this story through a males eyes and male focus only.

1. The curse of being Cap's girl, she can only be his

Honestly the misogyny on Peggy's character actually begins since the first movie but we'll get into the little details later, the first glaring ones to me begins ever since the Cap 2 movie, when they show Peggy as old she has pictures of her kids but none of her husband, why? We are even told she's had a good life, a full life, so where is her husband?

Because in the patriarchal way, Peggy Carter, even as an old lady who has lived her full life and is basically allowed to... is still Steve's. It's more likely they didn't want to show who "filled his shoes", so to speak, this imaginary man, this husband who got to have Peggy, "bested" Captain America and you can't have that can you? I know it may sound stupid but we are dealing with a male's worldview.

It even shows when in her interview you can see how she still hasn't quite gotten over Steve, she even seems to reluctantly say, "That's where I met my husband", in that interview you can see she is still affected, aka she hasn't gotten over him but then you got to remember, she's married now, she's supposed to be over him, why is she still so affected? Why does she speak of her husband like an after thought? Why did she even marry a man when clearly she wasn't over her last? Peggy isn't the kind of woman to marry just because she had to, you know she would only marry a man she fully loved, not just to not be a spinster.

The answer is that in the male worldview, no one can supplant Steve Rogers but not because Steve Rogers is someone you can't forget but because in the male eye, Peggy is Steve's property, for someone else to have her it means they "won" over Steve and you can't win the representation of maleness. Peggy at best got second scraps, yes you heard it, Peggy's husband is just supposed to be a "second best" beside Captain America, I'm sure he was a lovely husband and father but no man can ever "best" America's representative of maleness, remember this is the worldview from a male perspective.

The only time Peggy ever gets some agency is in her show and there's a beautiful scene at the end of season 1 where we literally see her tell Steve good bye, she gets over him, by season 2 she is well over Steve, she's still affected, mind you, of course she misses him but he is no longer her world, in fact she can now flirt and get into the idea of finding new love and she does in Sousa.

It's really unfortunate when the Cap's girl curse gets landed on them because Steve was never supposed to come back into her life but then he did and of course this means crashing all her progress, they didn't just made them break up, they killed Daniel Sousa, there had to be no trace of competition so Steve could very joyfully land in the past and fit into her life as if he never left

Steve Rogers never gets over Peggy but Peggy did but since Steve wants Peggy, the writers took that progress back and made her love him again no questions asked.

2. On Captain Carter

Wow Marvel is sure patting their back thinking they nailed "feminism" when they grabbed Peggy Carter and turned her into Captain America.

In the first episode, they do get it mostly, she is bigger, she's strong and she leads the Howling Commandoes but there's one little trick that lets you remember, this is still a man's world.

Steve's Hydra Stomper.

In the original format, aka the movie, they sell Peggy to us as a top agent, and she is, we get some badass moves from her at the beginning but once Steve finally gets into his role as Captain America, she gets placed behind the scenes, it's the classical "woman in a high position" but really the real high position is Philips, Peggy at best is only seen removing little flags from maps but we never actually see her in combat until the end but of course she had to be there, otherwise how will we get to the final kiss scene amairight?

We should've expected the same treatment right? Especially since there's a very telling excuse for Steve to stay behind lines and be the master behind it, he's skinny now, he isn't fit for battle at all but he can still help coordinate the Commandoes right?

Wrong.

You can't leave Captain America, even in his skinny form, out the battle, what is he? A woman? Those double standards are what hit me, no one cared if Peggy Carter joined the fights, she doesn't have to, she's not supposed to, we all know she's Cap's girl, she's not a soldier so no one bats an eye but when the roles are reversed, it's inconceivable that Steve takes his assigned role as a love interest.

How interesting it is that when male characters are placed in the love interest role they just have to fight to be interesting right? It's almost offensive to put a man as just a love interest that does nothing but be there right?

I am also glaring at you Gwen Stacy, Gwen Stacy as Peter Parker's girlfriend is literally just a girl that got caught by the baddie and Spiderman accidentally killed but when they reversed the story and now it was Gwen as spiderwoman and Peter the boyfriend... He turned into a lizard, yeah the boy couldn't just be the boyfriend and I'm not even sure if he was the boyfriend or just the friend which also, red flags! Peter can have girlfriends but Gwen can't.

Back to Peggy, if they had only shown that first episode, it would've been good, some minor double standards with Steve's Stomper but meh, I'll live.

The real treat is the sequel, I'll also make an honorary mention on how also in other episodes they still grind Steve hard and show you she is very much in love, not a fancy, she hard loves him, not even Steve showed that much fanatism, but hey, back to topic.

My biggest glare to this episode starts with the Watcher himself, he says he never does sequels and honestly he's right, he shouldn't because the result is honestly shit, from a Peggy character pov

They copy the plot of Steve Rogers story instead of making a new one for her.

Yup, you heard me and fine she wasn't going to deviate much I know but they seriously stuck way too much into Steve's story up to the point where it doesn't work and yes I'm glaring at you Winter Soldier arc.

The Winter Soldier arc works so well because Steve and Bucky have history together, Steve and Peggy have just feelings, the relationship between Steve and Bucky and Steve and Peggy are severely different, in both cases.

For Peggy it is because she is a strong willed woman, she's had to fight her way everywhere, Steve sees her as an equal and both understand what it is to constantly be fighting to prove to others who you are because by being a woman/weak man, everyone looks past you, they undermine you, that is the Steggy dynamic.

Bucky is very different, he's exactly the opposite, he's a man of his time, he's charming, healthy, strong and noble but he isn't too moved to act the way Steve is, he isn't as strong headed as Steve is, he's been blanketed by society but thanks to Steve he gets inspired to stand up for others, remember that while Steve tried to enlist, they had to draft Bucky. One of the things about their relationship is that Bucky treats Steve as an equal too but not an equality of same struggle like he and Peggy, Bucky merely treats him as a friend, he pushes Steve out of his comfort zone, I mean he put him on the Cyclone, they rode on the back of a freezer truck, Bucky drags Steve into his adventures and treats Steve like a friend, not a sickly kid and then later on its Steve the one that has to repay the favor when it's Bucky the one's that the Winter Soldier. It's loyalty to their years of friendship and Steve knowing Bucky's character the best.

So no you can't just exchange roles and honestly the fact that if you see every single episode of What If, you quickly realize that while they may all start from a slight deviation, it leads to completely different scenarios totally outside of any MCU story.

Yondu not keeping Quill doesn't form a slightly different Guardian of the Galaxy, it generates an entire new Avengers team, they even get rid of Jotunheim and Asgard as an after thought, there's absolutely no step to step plot in any MCU movie, it's a brand new story

Same as Iron Man after the New York battle not going through the hole, it launches him into a crazy Space Race in Skaandar and while yes we get a repeat of characters and themes and places, it gets rebranded and adjusted to the characters it has, that being Tony Stark and even delves with other character's themes such as Gamora and Tony striking a friendship and both getting rid of Thanos.

This doesn't happen with Peggy, they reuse Steve's storyline, again and even pull other movies move by move, the episode is an interesting take but too close from the plot of the movies while every single one of them has deviated and found new interpretations of the characters under different scenarios, with Peggy this doesn't happen and they are trying to fit her neatly in Steve's story with slight changes but NEVER does she ever get out of the mold of being intently focused on Steve.

Even Natasha points on her dating like "what if he's named Steve?", Peggy also will never look at another man, it being her own version of "Sharon Carter", which we must remember Steve shared a kiss with, we won't ever get a whiff of a "Sousa", maybe a grandkid or something, nope you bet we never will because while Steve can, Peggy must certainly can never, she's is solely and only Captain America's girl, Steve Roger's love interest.

#peggy carter #captain carter #what if #what if...?#marvel #mcu #marvel cinematic universe #marvel mcu

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hollybee8917 · 7 months ago

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Between Past and Present

Characters: Steve Rogers, Bucky Barnes, Sam Wilson, Bruce Banner

Plot: With more of his memories returning, Bucky has an opportunity to return to the past but is torn. If he stays, he will lose the only person who still believes in him. However, if he goes then he will never truly be happy there as he has gotten too used to the present.

Warnings: Light swearing

“You’re not coming with me, are you?”

Bucky stood there, not saying a word and staring at his friend. His mind was filled with conflict but he couldn’t vocalize what he was thinking. Sam stepped up beside him, “Of course he’s going with you, Steve. You two are best friends. You’ve both sacrificed so much for each other. You’re soul mates.”

Steve reached out to touch Bucky, “Please come with me.”

But Bucky flinched and stepped back, “I-I can’t. I don’t belong there.”

The former Captain America shook his head, “You don’t belong here without me either, Buck.”

A gulp and then, “Maybe I don’t belong anywhere, Stevie.”

Sam glanced between the two. They had called each other Buck and Stevie. They only did that when things were bad. He knew this conversation was serious and not one he should witness, “I’ll leave you two alone.”

Then he walked away. Steve Rogers stared pleadingly at Bucky Barnes, “I’m not coming back, Bucky. I’m staying in the past…”

Tears began to gather in Bucky’s eyes, “Steve, I-I can’t go. I don’t belong there.”

“But I can’t go back without you, Buck. You’re my best friend. Together till the end of the line, remember?”

Bucky felt some sad anger rising in him, “We were just dumb kids, Steve. We didn’t know what that meant. Hell, we are not the same men we once were. I fought aliens for god’s sakes.”

Steve matched Bucky’s anger, “So did I! THREE TIMES! Hell, I fought the government. For you.”

“I didn’t,” Bucky paused, “I didn’t ask you to do that. I told you I wasn’t worth it.”

Steve hung his head, “But you are worth it to me. It was supposed to be us against the world, remember?’

“Steve, the world you are talking about going back to has no place for men like us. We have seen too much and done too much to ever attempt to fit in there. There’s too much war in us. All we will ever be is soldiers. Nothing more. Why don’t you stay here? Let someone else return the stones.’

Again, Steve shook his head, “No, Buck. It has to be me.”

“If you do this, Steve, you will never see me again.”

The blonde reached out, “Don’t say that. Please don’t say that. Just come with me. We can be happy in the past. Maybe we’ll settle on a quiet street. I’ll be with Peggy and you can find that Ally girl you liked so much and marry her.”

“Her name was Anna Grace and no. I can’t. What don’t you understand, Steve? We will never really be happy there. We will have to live our lives all over again and I can’t face another seventy to eighty years of that. I don’t think either of us could.”

Steve pushed a strand of his hair off his forehead, “We would adjust.”

Bucky leaned back on his heels, “Would we though? We have been in the future for so long, could we really live without advancements in technology? What about the advancements in medicine? Do you really want to go back to a time where the best cure for a gunshot wound was penicillin?”

“Gunshots and penicillin weren’t a thing. But if it means being with Peggy then yes!”

Angrily, Bucky ran his hand threw his hair, “That’s not the point here. The point is she had a life without you, Steve! If you go back, even to an alternate timeline, you will throw off that perfect life she could have had without you. Find a girl here. Someone who reminds you of Peggy but is different. Hell, what about Sharon? You liked her!”

Steve grew silent. He knew Bucky had a point. Bucky always had a point. He slammed his hand against the wall, “That’s not fair, Bucky. I just-“

“You just have in your stubborn little head that you are going back and no one will be able to change your mind. Fine. Go back. But I am not coming with you, Steve.”

“Bucky. Bucky, come on. Till the end of the line, remember?”

“This is the end of the line, punk. This is it and there’s no avoiding that. Always remember that you made this choice.”

Bucky turned and walked away leaving a devastated Steve behind him. Steve called Bucky’s name but Bucky didn’t hear.

The next morning, Bucky stood with Sam, Banner and Steve at the site of the time portal. Banner was giving his instructions and Steve was nodding. Bucky, however, was letting his mind wander to everything he and Steve had been through together. More of his memories from before the war were floating back albeit in pieces. Before he could register it, Steve was standing in front of him. For a moment, neither man spoke.

Steve broke the silence, “Are you sure you won’t-”

Bucky held his hand up, “Don’t, Steve. I don’t want to rehash this.”

Steve smirked, “Don’t do anything stupid until I get back.”

Bucky returned the expression, “How can I? You’re taking all the stupid with you.”

The brunette stepped in for a hug and Steve returned it. Standing in that moment, holding each other, Steve and Bucky both wavered in their decisions but only in that moment. Bucky pulled back first. With a sad glance, Bucky murmured, “Gonna miss you, buddy.”

Steve tilted his head to the side, “It’s gonna be okay, Buck.”

For the first time in two days, Bucky let himself smile as he watched Steve step onto the platform. Sam spoke up, “How long is this gonna take?”

Banner responded, “For him, as long as needs. For us, five seconds.”

Steve turned and looked at Bucky as Banner called out, “Ready, Cap?”

He nodded and Banner continued, “Alright. We’ll meet you back here, okay?”

“You bet.” He lowered his gaze to Bucky who held his head high.

Banner called out, “Going quantum in 3..2..1.”

Then Steve was gone. Five seconds passed and Steve didn’t return. Sam and Bruce began to bicker but Bucky merely turned and walked away. He paused at the sight of a figure sitting on the bench at the water’s edge, “Sam.”

Sam walked over to Bucky. The former assassin glanced at him with a sad smile then jerked his head. Wilson stepped forward as Bucky turned and walked away. His best friend was gone. As Bucky passed Banner, Bruce stopped him, “I’m sorry. I didn’t know that Steve was going to stay in the past.”

“I did,” Bucky sighed, “we talked yesterday. Or rather, we fought yesterday. It’s fine. What’s done is done. Time to move on.”

Bruce nodded, “You gonna be okay?”

“Yeah, in time. Thanks doc.”

Bucky walked away.

#steve rogers #bucky barnes #marvel mcu #sam wilson #bruce banner

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marvelwitchergilmore · 2 years ago

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Old Friends, Old Cars and New Love

Summary: Dean Winchester x Fe!OC (Peggy) [feel free to see yourself as Peggy] -> When Dean takes Sam to see an old friend of his, Sam is, it's safe to say, more than confused to see his brother with an attitude that could only equal lovesick teen or, better yet, married.

Warning: FLUFF! Dogs, Back to the Future mentions (small), light swearing and fade to smut (mostly kissing), mutual pining, long fic etc.

When Sam woke up that morning, the last thing he expected was to find his brother awake before him - after having a full 8 hours sleep. Both of them. Both of them had slept 8 full hours and yet, Dean was still up before him.

“Dude, what the-”

“Get dressed.”

Sam paused by the kitchen door. “Okay?...Why?”

“We’re going for a ride.”

“Dean,” Sam began, “we’ve just come back from a hunt yesterday. Dude, we need a break-”

“You can stay here if you want.” Dean said, looking to his brother. “It’s not a hunt. I’m just visiting an old friend.”

“Friend? What friend? We don’t have friends, Dean. Our friends are all dead- well, most of them are.”

Dean ignored Sam’s comments. “Look, I’m going up to see her. You can either stay here or you can come with.”

“Her?”

Dean had never mentioned a ‘her’ before outside of Charlie, Jody and Donna.

Dean just nodded to his brother. “She’s just moved. Lives a couple hours away. Thought I’d go up and say hi. There’s a couple of things I want to grab while I’m up there, too.”

“Things? What things?” Since when had his brother become a sudden mystery. Her? Things? “Are you feeling okay, Dean? You’re not…concussed? Are you? Fever?”

Sam went to place his hand by his brother’s head, but Dean just batted it away. “Are you coming or not?”

Sam agreed to go. He wanted to know who this ‘her’ was.

All the way there, Sam asked questions.

“Who is she? When did you meet her? What’s her name? Where the hell are we going? You’re not going just to hook up, are you? Because if you are-”

“Sam.” Dean interjected. “She’s just an old friend. I met her when I was younger. She’s got a couple of my things in her attic that I need since we’ve moved into the Bunker. Now, will you please shut up.”

“Okay.”

It was a little while longer until finally they arrived.

Dean pulled Baby into park outside of a car mechanic shop. Sutton Workshop.

Slowly, Sam got out of the car whilst his brother practically skipped. Where the hell were they?

Mostly, the place was silent. Was she, whoever she was, aware that they were coming?

But Sam jumped the moment he heard a voice swear. Then he spotted a pair of legs from under the cherry red mustang..

“Shit!”

Dean chuckled. “Don’t worry Cherry. She’s all bark and no bite.”

Sam could only see the legs of the person, but they became paralised. But not out of fear - out of recognition.

From under the car, Peggy smiled. She thought she had been kidding herself when she heard the familiar roar of the familiar, black, 67’ but the moment she heard that deep chuckle, she knew.

“You talking to me or the car?” Peggy asked before she rolled herself from under the car to look at the older Winchester who was stood leaning against the car. “And get off. It’s a new paint job.”

Dean stepped back with his hands up. “Yes, ma’am.”

Peggy stood up and was quick to embrace Dean. “God, it’s good to see you.” He still smelt the same. It was almost intoxicating. Whiskey and leather the seats of Baby and…gunpowder? Yep. Still Dean Winchester.

As Peggy let go and stepped back, she found another guy stood beside them. “Peg, this is Sam.”

Peggy shook the hand of Sam’s shocked person. “Hi, nice to finally meet you.”

“I’d say you too but…”

“He didn’t tell you who I was, did he?” Peggy hit Dean’s arm, enough to make him hold it after. “Thanks for that.”

“What? He never asked.”

Sam pulled a face at Dean but he just shrugged in return. “So, tell me, what are you in town for?”

“I was hoping you still had some of my boxes.”

Boxes? What boxes? Dean had boxes?

Peggy smiled. “Yeah, I’ve still got em’. They’re up in my attic. I’ve still got a couple cars to work on but you’re welcome to go and get em’.” Peggy walked into her office before finding her house keys and chucking them over to Dean.

“You sure?”

Peggy nodded. “Yeah. I’ll meet you back at home later. I’ve got a customer coming picking up his car in about 20 minutes.”

“Okay, I’ll see you there.”

“See ya!” Peggy then slipped back under her car and continued her work.

“Sam!”

Sam jumped back into action and followed his brother back to Baby before Dean began driving a few streets away. “This is where she lives?”

“It didn’t look like this beforehand.” Dean told Sam, “She fixed it up.”

“She did all of this?”

Dean shrugged, placing the key into the door. “Well, I helped…a little.”

“When?” Sam asked, a little offended he didn’t know.

“About two years ago. There was a hunt close by and she needed some help. So I helped.” Dean briefly explained. “Up here.”

Sam found it oddly unsettling that his brother knew this house a lot better than he knew the Bunker. And that's saying something. It was like there was an air of domesticity around Dean - something Sam never, ever saw in him. No matter how hard Dean tried to have it, he never could but here? Here it was like he was swimming in it.

It was a good look on him.

Dean pulled at the short cord before the stairs collapsed down and he began to climb them.

The attic had been decorated, too. A little, at least. There were wooden panels everywhere, a couple of empty case boards and case file boxes on the floor. In the other corner was a large double bed with multiple plastic boxes on top with the labels of Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas on them.

All Dean could say was; “She’s a holiday person.”

Underneath the rest of the unpacked boxes and trunks was a rug. Clearly, this was made to be an extra bedroom but had become more of a storage space for a while.

Dean shrugged off his jacket and placed it over the wooden banister that was placed at the side of the door and began looking around.

In the middle of the sloping roof was a window that allowed you to either watch the birds fly by or watch the stars at night.

There had been so many nights spent here, for Dean. He could still remember the days when the case boards were filled with pinned photos and colored string leading from one to another.

As Dean began opening one box, Sam opened another. And that was when he saw it.

Dean’s things.

His stuff.

Everything from his childhood - photo albums, school reports, school projects…everything was saved. In another box were awards he’d gotten from school. His highschool diploma.

“She framed it.” Dean said in shock as he found it at the bottom of his box.

“What?” Sam asked, but Dean just ignored him and turned to the next box.

“Why didn’t you tell me about all of this?” Sam asked.

Again, nothing.

“Dean!”

Dean snapped out of his trance and looked to his brother. “What?”

“Why didn’t you tell me about Peggy?”

Dean shrugged his shoulders. “I guess it just never came up.”

“You helping fix a house never came up? Dean. We’ve been here half an hour and you’ve yet to tell me anything.”

“Look, Peg and I…we’re friends. Sometimes when I’d go hunting and there wasn’t a case, I’d come and see her. I’d help her out. It’s nothing.”

Sam thought for a moment. “So…have you two ever…”

Surprisingly, Dean seemed a little confused by what Sam was insinuating, but then it clicked. “What? Oh. No. No. We’re just friends. Jesus.”

Sam chuckled a little. “Okay, just…had to ask. You dressed as the easter bunny?”

“What?” Dean looked up and Sam showed him the photo.

“No. Mom dressed me as the easter bunny.”

“It’s cute.”

“No, it’s not.”

Then a voice cut the conversation. “It’s adorable.”

Dean smiled seeing as Peggy scaled the stairs and came up into the attic space. She looked over Sam’s shoulder from where he sat and took the photo in her hands. “Come on. I should frame it.”

“Don’t.” Dean warned.

She turned the photo so he could see. “But you’re adorable.”

He swiftly stood up and took the photo from her. “Absolutely not.”

“Fine.” Peggy groaned. “Jackass.”

“Moron.”

Sam couldn’t help but smile as he watched their interaction. He’d never seen Dean like this…it was good.

“Why are you looking through this stuff anyway?” Peggy asked, sitting on the floor beside Dean as he sat on the trunk.

“We’ve moved into a Bunker.”

Peggy laughed at first but then realized. “Oh, you’re being serious.”

Dean nodded, proudfully. “Yep. We’re legacies.”

“Legacies? How fancy.”

Dean didn’t explain further, so Sam did. “Our grandfather- Henry-”

Peggy quickly looked to Dean. “Your dad’s dad? You met your grandfather?”

She looked back to Sam and he nodded. “Yep.”

“Holy crap.”

“Anyway, he’s a Man of Letters. Apparently it’s a secret Hunter’s organization thing. Anyway, we’ve moved in.”

“And I want to actually make it a home.”

Peggy nodded, looking at Dean as he spoke. “That’s good. But you’ve always got a home here, if you need one.”

Dean looked at her and smiled. “I know.”

Sam watched the interaction again. Was Dean lying to him about the dating thing?

Peggy, however, then broke it and stood up. “I’ve put some food on. I’ll shout you down when it’s ready. You need any help?”

Dean shook his head. “No, we’ve got it. Thanks, Moron.”

“Anytime, Jackass.” Peggy smiled before making her way down the stairs but not before popping her head back up.

“You’re not allergic to anything, are you Sam?”

Sam shook his head. “No.”

“Okay, good. See you soon.”

Around an hour later, Peggy shouted for them both to come downstairs and wash up before all three of them sat down to eat.

“Who is this guy?” Dean asked, suddenly being met by a shaggy lab.

“That is Einstein."

“Back to the Future?” Dean asked.

“You know it.” Peggy smiled.

Sam was in shock. His brother couldn’t be more…normal if he tried. And since when did Dean like dogs?

“Einstein, outside. Come on. Fetch.”

Peggy threw his ball out into the backyard before closing the door and letting him run around the garden in circles until he’d tire himself out.

“When did you get him?” Dean asked, making his way into the dining room.

“Last year.” Peggy explained. “He was a shelter dog and I was getting lonely around here, so I adopted him.”

“What happened to creeper-dude? Rick.”

Peggy nodded. “Rich. And, we broke up.”

Dean nodded. “Good. Never liked him anyway.”

“You don’t like any guys I date.”

“Because they’re all wrong for you.”

“Then who’s right for me?”

Dean gave a slight smirk. “I don’t know. Me?”

Peggy looked at him and Sam could have swore he saw her blush as she looked down. “Oh, I walked into that one.”

“Yeah, you did.” Dean smiled. “You need help?”

“No, I got it.” Peggy carried the large bowl of pasta into the dining room whilst Dean grabbed the plates and laid them out.

The next hour and half was filled with many different conversations all from Dean’s stint in Purgatory to Sam’s days at Stanford. But it was all good. They laughed and cried at the laughter. And for Sam, it was the happiest he’d seen his brother…ever.

“I’ve finished the spare rooms so you two could stay if you want?”

“Are…are you sure?” Sam asked.

Peggy nodded and collected the plates but Dean swiftly took them from her and took them to the kitchen himself. “You cooked, we’ll clean.”

“Thanks. And, yes. I’m sure. I’d be nice to actually have someone to talk to. And I could use your help,” Peggy walked into the kitchen carrying the glasses. “A customer came in just before I shut up for the evening. American Station Wagon and I, for the life of me, cannot see anything wrong.”

“Well, it can’t be good if you need a second pair of eyes.”

“I know.”

Peggy was the best mechanic Dean knew. Anything that came into the shop from motorbikes to Baby herself. Peggy could fix anything and she was the only one Dean trusted enough to handle Baby.

The next day soon came and Sam decided to take a walk with Einstein to the dog park since Dean and Peggy headed to the shop early.

Meanwhile, as he passed the shop, he could see Dean stood in his gray t-shirt that was covered in grease stains from the oil whilst Peggy stood in her overalls and her hair pulled up into a messy bun. With the heat, Dean had pulled his own overalls to tie around his waist hence the stains on his t-shirt.

And when Bobby called Sam and Sam asked the old man about Dean and Peggy -

“Oh, yeah. I’ve seen them. God love that boy, but he’s an idiot.”

“Tell me about it.” Sam replied, rolling his eyes. “We’ve been here just over 24 hours and, Bobby, I have to tell you. I’ve never seen him like this before. He’s actually…happy. He slept all night. He was up just after me and Peggy.”

“You don’t have to tell me, boy. I was there when they met. Pair of lovesick teenagers if I ever saw em’.” Bobby explained. “But the idjit waited too long to make a move and now thinks he’s stuck in the friendzone.”

“Maybe he is.” Even as Sam said it, he didn’t believe it. “Maybe they are just friends.”

“Boy, have you ever seen Dean look at Jody that way? Or Donna, or Charlie? No.” Bobby pointed out. “That isn’t the look of friendship, Sam. That is the look of a man in love.”

Sam looked across the street and saw Dean looked at Peggy. God, Dean was so in love.

“You’re right, Bobby.”

“That boy’s too frightened of his own skin to do anything about it.” For as much as Dean was one of, if not the most feared hunter, he was terrified. He was terrified of something happening to him and leaving her alone or heartbroken, or worse, hating him for all eternity. And he was terrified that something would happen to her. He’d lost a lot of good people in his life, but Peggy? Well, she was the best. He couldn’t lose her or he might just lose himself, too.

Sam continued on his walk back from the park with Einstein and, eventually, around 8pm Dean and Peggy arrived back home.

Sam had called Dean and left him a couple of messages but, it was the note left on the kitchen counter which let him know where his baby brother was.

Dean listened to the voicemail Sam left.

“Everything okay?” Peggy asked.

Dean nodded. “Yeah…Sam’s gone on a date.”

“He has?”

Dean was a little shocked, but he was happy.

“Yeah. Eileen. She’s…a hunter we met a couple weeks back. She’s not too far from town and…he’s gone on a date.”

Peggy smiled. “Good for him. Oh, no. What’s that look?”

“I know he’s a grown man- we both know that.” Dean mentioned, mocking his brother’s height a little. “But…I don’t know.”

“It feels like he’s flown the nest?” Peggy smiled. “Don’t worry. When he comes back here with all his ‘first date’ questions, you can answer all of them in detail. Maybe even teach him about the birds and the bees-”

And the moment was gone. “Okay. Nope. Not doing that.”

Peggy gave a soft laugh. “Okay, go and get a shower because as much as I enjoy the smell of motor oil, I’d rather not smell it 24/7.”

Dean nodded. “Okay.”

When Dean finished in the bathroom - remembering to place his towel inside the washing basket outside the door - that was when he spotted them.

Photos.

Their frames lined the walls and they were all of her family. Her folks, cousins, school friends and…him.

Dean, carefully, picked it off the wall.

There were a few of both of them scattered across the walls in the home. But Dean could remember this one.

It was the first time they fixed a car together. Her mom or dad must have taken it since Bobby was asleep in the background with his cap over his face. He could see her smile - it still made his heart warm. But he could see his, also. God, he was so in love with her. Still was.

That was when he heard the soft humming of music from the attic.

Turning back, he switched the bathroom light out and headed up the stairs and found Peggy smiling softly at the record case in her hand.

Etta James.

She’d maybe played that album 30 times or more when they first met.

The song currently playing was Sunday Kind of Love. It was…her.

Peggy had to move the boxes from the bed to grab the record player from down the opposite side of the bed.

Peggy looked up when she sensed him, and smiled. “Oh, hey.”

“Hey,” Dean then remembered the photo in his hand. “I found this.”

Placing the record beside her on the trunk, she stood and walked over to Dean. She took the photo from his hands and examined it. She’d put the photo’s up so long ago, she almost forgot she actually had them.

Peggy smiled, as did Dean. “I remember this! This was the first car we worked on together.”

She went quiet for a few moments until- “God, I was so in love with you here.”

But then she realized what she had said and the fact that she had said it out loud. The smile from Dean’s face dropped when he realized, too. “What?”

Peggy panicked, but tried her best to remain calm. “Nothing. I - I don’t even know why I said that.”

She went to turn away and to pick the album cover up again. “Peg, what do you mean-”

“Nothing. It doesn’t matter.” But Dean didn’t take her reply.

“You were in love with me?”

Crap.

“Dean, you don’t have to worry.” Peggy tried to tell him. “I was young. We both were.”

“Peg, just answer the question.”

“Dean-”

Dean stepped a little closer to her. “Did you love me?”

There was no getting out of this one.

“Maybe.” She first answered. “No. Yes. Dean, look, I was young and you were…you. You don’t have to-”

“Do you still?”

Now this question shocked her more than the last. Of course she did, but could she really tell him that? Tell him that for the past, almost 17 years of her life, she had loved him. That every now and then she’d date someone but it always ended because of many reasons, but the main was was that the guy wasn’t him? Because she knew, deep down, that her heart or at least some part of her would always belong to him. Always.

“Dean…I-” Peggy couldn’t find the words.

Dean found himself stepping forward a few more steps and slowly leaning down. “Dean-” He pulled back a little. “You don’t have to do this.”

But Dean only gave a silent answer by looking at her and leaning in slowly until eventually the breath he could feel on his lips wasn’t just his own. It was hers, too. He’d waited 17 years to do this - all because he’d been too scared, too chicken. Bobby was right. He is an Idjit.

The first kiss was soft. Barely there. Really, it couldn’t be considered a kiss. It was more of a breath.

But then his lips caught hers and as he truly kissed her, she kissed back. His hands cupped her cheeks and softly held her closer to him.

Peggy herself found his reaction a shock, but found her own an even bigger one. She was kissing him back. Slowly, her hands came up to his chest and the moment she felt him pulling away, her hands gripped at his shirt and pulled him closer.

Even though the first kiss didn’t really break fully, this was still their second kiss. And she could feel Dean’s smile in it, causing a small one of her own as she felt his hands go from her face to her back, holding her in a hug almost until finally his hands reached her legs and he lifted her up.

Her own hands were by his face, feeling his clean shaven skin beneath her palms.

This was the best kiss of their lives.

It only took a few steps, but Dean eventually reached the bed in the corner of the room and lay Peggy carefully onto her back, being careful not to break the kiss too much.

They’d both waited so long for this.

Maybe they should have told each other sooner.

“Peggy-” Dean managed to pull back for a moment but his own desire to keep on kissing took back over for a short second. “Peg- Peggy.”

“Dean, if you don’t-”

“I love you.”

Dean was never one for words, not really. He usually showed his love more than he said it. But with her it was different. He could talk. He could tell her how he felt and what he was thinking. He could tell her he loved her. He had to tell her.

“I know I don’t say it often, but I do. I was in love with you, too. In that photo. I have been since we were kids. Maybe that’s why it didn’t work out with other people? Maybe that’s why I don’t want anyone to stick. But you-”

“Dean,” Peggy interjected. “I love you too.”

Dean felt his own brain stall. He had an idea before he kissed her but hearing it? That was something different. It felt different.

“Are you-”

Peggy gave a light laugh that had been giving him butterflies in his stomach since the first day he heard her laugh. “Jackass? I just told you I love you, too. Now, shut up and kiss me.”

Dean smiled back. “Yes, ma’am.”

And he did as he was told.

Dean lowered himself back down and they began kissing all over again. If they were both dead now, this was their heaven. They didn’t need much else besides one another, and maybe a comfortable bed and a couple cars to fix when they weren’t too busy.

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rain-lavender-rain · 2 years ago

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With Love, From Your Soldier - Part 6 - Final

Warnings: None, prepare for some feels. Final part of the series.

Read Part 5 Here

______________________________________________________________

The last letter was one that Bucky had sent, telling me that he supported me and promising a dance.

I had sent him a letter in reply, but it must have gotten lost in the mail somewhere, and I never got a reply. I only got a letter from Steve with his condolences.

I never made it overseas, and by the time the war was over, I had lost both my best friend, and my lover. Peggy came back to the States and we became friends, our pain being something that brought us closer together.

I never married or had any kids. Instead, I spent my time in a lab with Howard Stark helping him with experiments, projects and so on. I busied myself with that work, and Howards friendship was something I held close to my heart.

A boy, not much older than Bucky would have been when he left was sent with the 84th infantry. The 84th took over 100 German pillboxes and bunkers in the Siegfried line, and was a vital part of the Battle of the Bulge where the boy lost his life in battle. He married right before he shipped out to a wonderful woman named Helen. Helen was also a big part of my life after the war ended. Helen ended up naming her child with the middle name of "James". It was nothing I ever asked for, but Helen always had the biggest heart and her friendship was worth more than gold.

I spent time mourning, and was mostly happy for the rest of my life afterwards, but I'll admit, it was never the same after Bucky passed. When Peggy told me that they had found Steve, I was overjoyed and heartbroken all at the same time. You're still asleep as I write this, but I'm writing this in hope that one day you will wake up.

Know that I never blamed you. Know that the world is different now, and its changed in ways you can't even imagine. I just hope you understand that, you Steve Rogers, were one of the most important people in his life and that he looked up to you in more ways than one. He was proud of you, and so am I.

Bucky still has my heart, always has, and always will. In hopes that you wake up, I have one last request- something that I am only asking for because I know all three of us were connected with a string mending our hearts together. Your friendship always meant so much to both Bucky and I. I feel selfish asking, but consider it my parting wish. Every year on his birthday, I have left red roses on his grave. My only request is that you do the same.

I send all my love Steve, and I hope you keep your heart and your light with you. Use this second chance without regrets. However you decide to live it, know that Bucky and I will always love you and are proud of you.

-Y/N

______________________________________________________________

Tags for @playboystark <3

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #james bucky barnes #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky x you #bucky barnes x you

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slickshoesareyoucrazy · 2 years ago

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Holiday Films and Romantic Heroes

OR…George Bailey Has Big Shoes to Fill, But J Can Do It

I never know what to get J for Christmas. He’s a hard man to shop for. It gives me anxiety. Because he deserves to be lavishly celebrated, but…I don’t know how to do that properly, I guess.

Gift giving for J is kind of intimidating, because, in my life, J’s the best person who’s ever been born. I know…people who actually read the stuff I post know we have a son, and I’m supposed to say that our son is the best person to ever be born. I get it. Of COURSE I love our son to absolute pieces. I love him on a cellular level. I love every neuron in his brain and every blood cell pumping through his veins. I’d gladly and without hesitation lay down all my cells for any of his. But I loved J like that FIRST, and without that consuming love for J, there would be no Boy. The Boy is the best *gift* J ever gave me. And he was even born immediately before Christmas. We brought him home from the hospital on Christmas Eve. Again…I know. I’m a modern feminist. I don’t think women should be pigeon-holed by or glorified for motherhood, and not everyone wants to be a parent, but I DID and DO. I know women aren’t defined by the number of children they have (or don’t have), and a huge number of women parent solo, some by choice, not circumstance. But being a mom is important to me, personally, and I know it’s something that wouldn’t have happened for me without J. I never trusted anyone else enough to have sex with them, much less embark on a decades long partnership involving another human life, and I know it’s not something I’d have ever considered choosing to do by myself.

J has given and continues to give me…jeez…everything. When I was a little girl, I wanted a dog so badly I dragged a plush dog around for years, pretending it was real. I even wrote a little ‘theme’ at school in the second grade about My Dog (my stuffie) that was so convincing my teacher mentioned it to my mom on parent/teacher night. ‘Boy, she really loves her dog.’ My mom revealed it was just a stuffed animal, and my teacher was stunned. I begged my parents incessantly, always hearing 'no.’ When J and I got married and moved to our current home, I mentioned that I’d always wanted a dog. (One of the reasons for 'no’ when I was a kid was that we lived in an apartment. I asked again when we lived in a house with a fenced in yard…my parents still said no).

J: You want a dog? I’ll get you one.

He was on PetFinder within the next five minutes. We had our rescue pupper dog 6 weeks after we bought the house.

J’s given me unconditional acceptance of my quirks and kinks and flaws, and has helped me better myself. I’m physically in better shape, I’m less afraid in general and my panic attacks are fewer and farther between. I’m happier, more confident, more comfortable socially, and I feel more attractive. He’s given me financial independence…a product of his hard work, ingenuity, and sacrifice, not inherited wealth or blind luck. He gave me the child I always wanted, the home I always wanted, the dog I always wanted, the relationship loyalty and security I always wanted, the family I always wanted, plus about a million other smaller things. And he doesn’t even ask for any credit for it.

Anyway, I’ve seen this survey question floating around online: 'Which fictional couple would you compare yourselves to?’ I’ve seen a lot of good answers. Hank and Peggy Hill (ha!), Gomez and Morticia Addams, Meredith Grey and Derek Shepard from Grey’s Anatomy, Harry and Sally from When Harry Met Sally, Archie and Edith Bunker from All in the Family…

I’d say J and I are more like George and Mary Bailey from It’s a Wonderful Life.

(HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I love that scene!) It’s a romantic movie, not just a holiday film. Trust me. It’s actually probably my favorite love story in film. And J is that kind of romantic hero. He’s so kind and selfless and always does the right thing and helps other people, even when it involves a forfeit of what he wanted for himself. He’s that quiet, unsung hero in real life. He asks me what I want and works hard to make it happen, whether that’s his own giving nature and determination, or encouraging me and helping to hold me accountable to achieve my own goals. I don’t normally ask for or want to do anything too crazy, but J will still help me get whatever it is with little, if any, regard for how wildly irrational it might be.

And me? Well…you know that scene where Clarence is showing George how things are because he’d never been born, and George asks for Mary, and Clarence says, 'You’re not gonna like it George…’ and they find her and she’s a fearful, solitary, pathologically reclusive librarian whose entire life is her work? Not that there’s anything wrong with fearful, solitary, pathologically reclusive librarians whose entire lives are their work if that’s what they want out of life, but that’s not the life I wanted for myself. I am **convinced** that would be me without J. J gave me the **life** I always wanted.

So I get anxiety every year around Christmas, because I don’t know what to do for him. How to show enough appreciation and gratitude to him. I feel overwhelmed with those feelings every day, but especially on gift giving occasions. He’s given me all of this…he’s made literal dreams and fantasies come true for me. Getting him some car accessory or renewing his subscription to American Motorcyclist seems dreadfully inadequate. And the one way J is NOT like George Bailey is that he’s never in any kind of big trouble I could save him from, so…I can’t even plagiarize the movie. All I have is a bunch of sappy (but heartfelt and TRUE) words. And imperfect me.

I love J beyond all rhyme and reason. I’m so, so happy and grateful he was born, and that I get to be his wife. He’s my romantic hero. He’s my leading man. Thank you, J, for my wonderful life. It IS a wonderful life.

#no reblogs please

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winniebarnesfanclub · 2 months ago

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i need to stop going on anti-steve blogs, i can't respond to the posts bc that would be fucked up and rude but also seeing someone have absolutely zero reading comprehension and still be so fuckinh confident that they're right abt everything just pisses me off so bad

this was originally gonna be all in the tags but apparently you can't go over 30 tags so I'm copypasting it here

#they said tony was a better person than steve bc tony never cheated on pepper and steve kissed 4 ppl after he started dating peggy

#they were so confident they even had ''''evidence'''' and im just fucking mind blown

#like their evidence was all so easily debunked as not remotely in the realm of cheating

#1. pvt lorraine: She Kissed Him. he ended up kissing back but he was fully caught off guard by it

#it wouldve been assault if he hadnt decided he was into it

#but also. he and peggy weren't officially dating at that point. no agreements to exclusivity had been made. so Not Cheating.

#2. unknown 'that was not my first kiss since 1945' person: ok and???? 70 years had passed for peggy and she was now a 90yo with dementia

#he's not allowed to move on from a relationship that pretty much ended 2 years ago from his pov?? and 70 years ago from hers???????

#you think peggy is under the impression theyre still dating????

#was peggy cheating when she got married and had kids while steve was in the ice??????

#no the answer is no when steve got out of the ice their romantic relationship had alreadt ended even if they hadnt wanted/meant for it to

#by virtue of him fuckinh DYING AND BEING DEAD and her living her own goddamn life for SEVENTY FUCKING YEARS

#3. natasha: they were undercover. thats it. there was no romantic or sexual intent and the other option was getting caught

#also getting caught wouldve involved a possible fight to the death/definite civilian casualties/guaranteed executions if they were caught

#if you think any of those things are worth making sure no one ever nonsexually/nonromantically kisses your partner then pls dont ever date??

#you dont have healthy priorities and no one should ever be subjected to ur current thought process

#4. sharon: PEGGY WAS DEAD. PEGGY WAS IN THE GROUND. THATS NOT CHEATING OH MY GOD

#widow/ers are allowed to move on with their lives and find future partners!!!! its not required but its ok if they want to do it!!!!!

#also PEGGY GOT MARRIED AFTER STEVE 'DIED'. thats um... a lil more than kissing!

#(and technically - unlike steve - she didnt even have hard evidence he was dead. it was a v fair assumption but given the fact that he ended up

#being Not Dead ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯. steve at least had confirmation of death/a body)

#(also im sorry for being so indelicate or whatever it was intentional for rhetorical purposes)

#if we're not mad at peggy for dating daniel sousa we can't be mad at steve for sharon

#(admittedly IF peggy was '''the love of his life''' i agree the timing of the sharon kiss could be inappropriate. but like. thats a big if)

#anyway

#5. PEGGY AND STEVE WERE NEVER ROMANTICALLY INVOLVED/EXCLUSIVE

#they flirted a lot. they kissed once. they pretended to schedule one date to cope with the fact that they both knew steve was about to die

#the filmmakers tried to make some implications. how much they succeeded is up to individual audience members (death of the author baybee)

#there were exactly ZERO instances of onscreen acknowledgement that they were CURRENTLY involved in a romantic relationship during the war

#you could say they both wanted to be. that'd be supported by the text

#you could even say they Intended to be but were waiting for the war to end. again supported by the text

(my tags ended there so im gonna format normally from now on. anyway)

if two people are deeply in love and are friends and decide that neither of them have time to date right now but they'll try in a couple months and just keep things status quo til then as two friends who are in love but not acting on it, and then one of them gets hit by a bus on the way to their first date... they never dated!!!!!! it's tragic and sad and a tale of missed opportunities but they never dated!!! the survivor might Feel like a widow/er but the fact is they aren't one. if they never mutually established that they were in a romantic relationship, then they were not in one

also if person A who got hit by a bus was in a coma for 15yrs and then woke up to find that the person they were in love with DIDNT wait for them and live a life of celibacy at their hospital bedside. itd be tragic for them but it wouldn't make person B a bad person.

and if person A woke up and found out person B moved on got married had kids and then got hit by a bus and was now in their own coma? person A is ALSO allowed to move on.

even if person B did spend the entire 15 years at person A's bedside caring for them. neither of them is obligated to establish/continue a romantic relationship if/when person A wakes up. person A is going to have Severe trauma. person B is going to have 15 years of personal growth. neither of them is guaranteed to be the people they were before the bus accident

anyway this got way off track but the fact of the matter is that steve never cheated on peggy and I need to avoid steve-antis for my own health

#sr #if anyone reads that whole thing u r a stronger person than me #mine

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lestweforget5 · 2 months ago

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Maybe one of Millie’s kids getting involved in like a Civil rights matter or feminism or maybe dating a POC and someone else having a preconceived idea about Millie’s opinion because army wife + southerner, but Millie being like ‘I fought against racist sexist arseholes! Just because I’m quiet doesn’t mean I am a racist sexist arsehole!’ But in a more Millie way of saying it.

Just Millie biting back at southerner stereotypes in her very Millie way.

Hello, Nonnie! Thank you for the ask! This has given me some very interesting food for thought. And I already know my thoughts are going to be quite lengthy, so I'm adding in the cut.

Given the role that Millie and the other women played during the war, I definitely could see her being interested/involved in, more quietly, some activist roles. And where ill-health/PTSD might stand in the way of Millie at some points, Maggie, who never marries and was even more outspoken than Millie, would also be an influence, I'd expect, on the Brady children.

Re the feminism angle:

Fighting for your country in a front-line role and, especially, being a prisoner of war changes you; you just can't rebound to what you were before the war, even if society at that period tended to itself rebound in the roles it expected of/allowed women during and after a war. I just finished reading a book called A Game of Birds and Wolves, which details the involvement of the WRNS in the development of anti-U-Boat tactics for the Battle of the Atlantic in WW2, and several passages at the end of the book struck me hard, thinking about this sort of context. The quotes are from pages 259-60.

‘The end of the war was a blow in lots of ways,’ said Peggy Hill, a Wren based at Swansea naval base. ‘Everybody felt the same. It was the end of a completely different way of living, like coming back to earth again. The missing went on for years.’ None felt ‘the missing’ more keenly than the women who, via war’s arrival, had been given an unprecedented opportunity to occupy spaces and roles that had been closed off to them. They had entered the war as one thing and exited as quite another. ‘The Wrens have carried out duties once thought to be completely outside the scope of womenkind.’ ... For the Wrens, the arrival of peace meant somehow relinquishing a new-found identity.

... When they arrived home, however, many of the young women found it difficult to reintegrate with former contemporaries. ‘They didn’t know what my life had been,’ said Claire James, a plotter who became a leading Wren. ‘I’d led a totally different life to anybody at home. I’d gone through things people at home hadn’t. I found it very difficult, settling back.’ ... The fresh opportunities that the country had, for a moment, afforded women in war were widely rescinded.

The women of the 100th bled and died and suffered for their country and saw horrors that you can never ever unsee. You cannot just go back to the status quo ante, even if other people want you to. Life doesn't work like that. People don't work like that. And while Millie is not looking for personal recognition, she wants those sacrifices to be acknowledged and honored and for her and the others not to be pushed back into the boxes of other people's preconceived notions of what women of that era should be. Not to say that there's anything wrong with being a stay-at-home mother or a housewife, but war irrevocably changes you, and what you were before isn't the same as what you are now, and as difficult as some male veterans found it reintegrating, I think female veterans in this Integrated AU would have A LOT of problems, too, and those boxes could have made it harder.

Re one of her children dating a POC:

I think this is the area where people's preconceived notions could go the most awry. After being further north long enough, Millie's Arkansas twang might soften a bit, but it is still quite noticeable for her entire life and marks her as someone who was born and grew up in the Deep South. And, sadly, being from the Deep South, especially in that era, can come with preconceived notions/implications about what that person thinks about ... issues of ethnicity, one could say.

But here's where things get interesting. In Sunward I've Climbed, when Macon, Jefferson, and Daniels arrive, Millie doesn't quite know what to think about their presence, if only because

there were so few colored folk in Randolph County, Arkansas, that she had rarely ever interacted with them growing up. At the very least, in the middle of a POW camp in the depth of Hitler’s Reich was the last place where racial issues needed to be causing conflict. They had enough enemies and problems to deal with without causing conflict with fellow Americans.

So, while Murph, who was from Atlanta, as I recall, was quite uncomfortable off the bat, Millie just follows Brady's lead and Buck's, for lack of any other plan initially.

So her first real interactions with POC are with Macon and Jefferson, as they all share a bunk room, and that influences her entire perception of those issues for the rest of her life and how she talked to her children about those issues.

(This is me just spitballing here, too, but given their talents in engineering and math, I could see Millie and Macon having some interesting conversations when they're both laid up in the bunk room, although I'm not knowledgeable enough about either to write a credible scene of such. There's just room for so much character development between August and her sharing her aspirin with Macon, when neither of them basically talk to her at all, to January where she carries with her the special birthday drawing Alex made for her.)

But, all that being said, yeah, Millie would not be very patient with being judged by where she was born. She's her own person with her own experiences, and even if she didn't say anything at first, she would definitely be quietly judging you and probably freezing you out ... in a very polite southern way. And knowing Brady will back her up would definitely help her take a stand on some issues.

#masters of the air #the sunward verse #oc: millie brady #ask answered

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steven-g-rogers · 1 year ago

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Steve smiled and cuddled her close, closing his eyes and trying to bring back the daydreams of his future life. They had started very bright and hopeful but toward the end had started getting a little more realistic. She was always part of them though and even the more realistic ones were happy and full of love.

"I think early on, when Bucky was still alive and you and I still hadn't really admitted how we felt about each other, though I felt that maybe you felt the way I felt about you. Back then I had such silly little things. The war being over and everything just being okay. I thought we'd retire from all this army stuff get married. Bucky would be my best man. We'd buy a house next to his in Brooklyn. We'd raise our kids together. I think it was a fantasy of what I thought was expected of me. Or how life was supposed to be for people, you know?"

He leaned his cheek on her head for a moment and let out a breath. "Then Bucky fell from that train and I started to become very aware that not only would things not just automatically be okay when the war ended, the army was never going to just let me go. The fantasies changed a bit. I figured you'd end up running the SSR. You always seemed to be running it anyway. I'd probably still be in the Army. Hopefully I'd be moving up the ranks and trying to enact some real change. We'd still get married though. Maybe we'd live in DC. We'd be friends with Howard... god if that had happened..."

He trailed off, that was one of the things Peg maybe shouldn't know. But he couldn't help but think how maybe if he and Peggy were active in Tony's life growing up, maybe he wouldn't have grown up so angry and needing to fight everyone and everything for his place in the world.

If she had known, perhaps that’s why she couldn’t let herself love Daniel fully. Because her true love was coming home to her. Because hope wasn’t gone.

“We’ll always be in our honeymoon phase, darling,” she said. “Even with all the real life things, we’ll still be like this, and wanting to kiss and cuddle. We’ll steal these moments and take time just to be together, even with work and real life. This is real and you are my life, my love.”

Peggy smiled at him and hugged him. “Just think for a moment…if you hadn’t gotten lost in the plane, if you’d come home in ‘45 when we’d won the war. Would we still be like this? We would have gone dancing that Saturday night. And then what? Would we have continued dating and gotten engaged? I know I’m just daydreaming but I just want to see what you think and how you think life would be.”

#agentpeggycarterrogers #steve x peggy

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donutloverxo · 4 years ago

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Soooo there are many fics where reader makes steve jealous and it ends in rogh possesive fcking.. but what if steve tries to make reader jealous and it totally backfires and she becomes extremely insecure?? But please with a fluffy ending because my poor heart can’t handle anything less 🥺🥺

Hey. Thanks for the request and I hope this fits. *gif is not mine* Dividers by @firefly-graphics

Please note that my stories are not to be stolen or reposted on any other site. Reblogs and welcome and much appreciated. This blog and this story is 18+. Do not read, follow or interact if you are not 18+. Please🙏🙏

"Um... yes?" You asked as you brought down the hand which was holding out a twenty dollar bill - since you thought it was the pizza you've been waiting for, for like the past half an hour, and not a blond, six feet and some inches,tall super soldier.

"Hi... doll," he smiled.

"My name's Y/N," you corrected him as you frowned, so fed up of men undermining you by calling you such 'sweet' nicknames. You knew Captain Rogers wasn't like that, but still you couldn't have him getting any ideas.

"Right," he cleared his throat as he repeated your name. "Sorry," he said with a toothy grin, which almost made your heart melt.

"How did you get my address, Captain?"

"Tony gave it to me. I would've asked you at work... but I wanted to do this the right way."

"Do what?" you quirked a brow.

"Um, I maybe people aren't as formal nowadays," he sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck, "But I can't really change who I am... not so late in life anyway," he cringed as he realised he was pretty rambling then, taking a deep breath he gathered enough courage, "I wanted to ask you to come with me, as my date, to the valentines party this Sunday."

You hummed at that, considering it because damn if Rogers wasn't convincing. Even when he wasn't as authoritative and dominating as he is when he puts on the suit.

It would be nice to be courted and treated nicely, and to not have to put up with the shit most men try to pull with you, you were sure Rogers would show you the time of your life. Besides, only an idiot would say no to him.

"No." You said with a finality that left no room for debate. "Is that all?"

"Uh... I... yes..." he stammered, not exactly prepared to be turned down so bluntly. "Can I ask why?"

"I don't shit where I eat."

"What?" his eyebrows cutely scrunching up.

You just knew you must've touched a nerve with your crass language. Tony, your boss, had told you about Cap and his 'language' incident.

"I don't date people at work... it can get complicated," you explained as he nodded.

It wasn't a complete lie. You didn't want to be known as the 'easy' girl or have others gossip about you. But that would be a sacrifice you'd willing make for someone like Steve. Who'd dare make fun of the Captains girl anyway?

You had been smitten with him from the moment you saw him, learning about his bravery and sacrifice as a kid you looked upto him and respected him, but when you met him in real life... you were a complete goner. Your stomach did somersaults every time he touched you, or hell even looked your way.

You tried your best to flirt, which was basically you stuttering and trying to make small talk whenever you had a chance to talk to him. Since he was born almost a century ago he would probably be offended if you were the one to make the first move.

You continued your back and forth for weeks before he told you about her. That he'll be visiting her over the weekend. You simply nodded, having a vague idea of who Peggy Carter was but not of what she went to Steve.

After some research you found out that she was an old flame of his, someone he couldn't marry and build a life with because he was frozen for decades. Upon seeing her many qualifications, and just how freaking brilliant she was, you knew one thing.

You may not be as smart as her, but you knew that you could never measure upto a woman that incredible. Someone Steve still visits after all these years. You were already afraid that he was out of your league but now you were sure of it.

"Did I do something wrong?" he wanted to know.

"What do you mean?"

"Well," he shoved his hands in his pockets, his bottom lip jutting out in a pout, "It's just that you used to talk to me all the time... and now it seems as if you're ignoring me. Is it because of something I did? Whatever it is I never meant to hurt you," he swore.

You sighed. "It's nothing you did, really. I just realized how incompatible we are. I hope you find the one you're looking for, someone who'll make you happy and give you the world. It just won't be me."

You didn't let him say anything closing your door instantly as you kept your tears at bay.

At the valentines party

"Cap," Tony said, slapping a hand on Steve's shoulder, "I thought you'd have her on your arm tonight. What happened?"

Referring to his assistant. He wanted to play cupid this once, since it was the season of love, he wanted to see his idiot friends happy. He was sure you both would be disgustingly smooching and all cute at the party. But not only had you both shown up separately, you seemed to be actively ignoring Steve.

"She uh... rejected me," he said, looking down into his glass of whiskey. It didn't do much for him but it helped him blend in.

"Ouch," Tony winced, "I was sure she would go for you. But I guess I have been wrong before," he shrugged.

"Really?"

"Yeah. She goes all heart eyes whenever you're around. But I guess that's nothing unique since that's just how most women act around you," he scoffed. "You should read all the love letters you got today. I was going through them, you have quite a passionate fanbase of people who want to... what was it..." he pretended to think hard about it. "Yes, 'ride your bicep', I don't understand the physics of how on earth that would work, but I am intrigued."

"Tony," Steve rolled his eyes as he always does when he's around the billionaire. "I don't really care about all of them... they don't know me. I only care about her and I don't know why she said no, but there's nothing I can do about it."

"Whoa, you're accepting defeat so soon? Where's that I-can-do-this-all-day attitude?"

"This isn't a war, Tony. If she doesn't see me that way... then there isn't much I could do."

"Maybe she's just playing hard to get. There's absolutely no way to really know what goes on in womens heads, Rogers. They're so smart and sneaky... it's kinda scary actually."

"I don't think she'd play games..."

Tony had gotten distracted pretty quickly and left Steve alone to pout and only appreciate your beauty from afar. You had worn a pink dress with red hearts on it, and for some reason, you got more beautiful every time he looked at you.

"Hello."

He jerked when he heard the foreign voice, looking at the blonde woman next to him, with her hand out, he shook it just to be polite.

"I'm Crystal," she smiled, flashing her sparkly white teeth.

"I'm Steve."

"Of course I know who you are!" she laughed, "You're Captain America, everyone knows you," she playfully hot his bicep before squeezing it, "Oh my... you must work out a lot."

"Uh... yeah..." he nodded. He could never get used to how people perceived him so differently.

"There is something I need to know really bad," Crystal blinked as she looked up at him, "Do you wear underwear in those suits? They seem really tight, wouldn't it be uncomfortable?"

"Oh, um... we just sort of..."

You had never looked at yourself as a jealous person. Maybe things were different when it came to Steve... he was a pretty special guy.

When you looked at him, talking to some girl, dancing with her, laughing and having fun with her, it was as if you were on fire from simmering rage, at the same time you could feel your heart breaking in a million pieces.

You knew it was wrong. You had no claim to him, he can do whatever he wants. If you said no to him then it makes perfect sense that he seeked out someone else.

You just had to get away for some fresh air, so you wouldn't abandon all class and pull the girls hair and drag her away from your Steve.

You yelped when you heard him call out your name.

Looking over your shoulder you saw him staring at you, his brows scrunched up, he looked so worried. But why?

"What're you doing here? You'll catch a cold, doll," he takes off his blazer, putting it over your shoulders and then groaning when he realised his slip up.

"Right, sorry, old habits die hard. I won't call you that again, I promise," he said, crossing his finger over his heart.

"No... I think it's kinda sweet. No ones ever had such an endearing petname for me. I do like it."

"Oh," he frowned, "it's just that you said you didn't."

Tony, of all the people in the whole universe, was right. There was no understanding women.

"I guess I lied..."

"Why?"

"Um..." You were at a loss of words and nervous. Steve wouldn't tolerate lies, and you didn't want him to hate you. "It was easier to do that then tell you the truth."

"What's the truth?"

"I do like you... a lot. But I don't want to live in someone else's shadow. And I just think the whole thing would end in a disaster..."

"What're you talking about, Y/N?"

"Peggy. Your first and only love. I can't measure upto her, not in my wildest dreams, there's no use trying."

"Why would you have to measure upto Peggy?"

You opened your mouth to answer, but couldn't really come up with an answer. "Why wouldn't I?"

"I did have feelings for her, but that was a long time ago. I'm happy she lived her life, it just wasn't meant to be."

"So, you're not still in love with her?"

"No," he shook his head, "I wouldn't have asked you out if I was."

"Well, what about Crystal? You were practically glued to her the entire evening!" you huffed as you stomped your foot. Mad at your own stupidity. You could've simply told him the truth and asked for a straight answer. "I have to warn you, she had was pretty crazy in the last season."

"Last season?"

"Mm-hm, the last season of her reality show, I've seen all eight seasons. Maybe they just amp up the drama, maybe she isn't actually crazy, I wouldn't know," you shrugged.

"Doll," he smirked, circling a hand around your waist and pulling you into him, "are you jealous?"

"I am not!" you gasped, looking away from his eyes as you felt your cheeks heat up.

"I don't want anyone but you. Why would I? You're goddamn perfect. And... I want you to be my girl."

"I guess I don't really have a reason to say no now..." you murmured, your face still flustered as you played with the buttons on his shirt before he tilted your chin up to make you look at him, placing his lips over yours in the most tender of kisses.

"Got the job done, Tones... I'm pretty sure I saw him go after her, I have to say though, you look at Captain America, and you really don't expect him to be that awkward..." Crystal said as she sipped on her gin and tonic. "You owe me."

Tony only hummed, not too happy about being indebted to someone, but you both needed a necessary push in the right direction.

#berry answers #steve rogers x reader #chris evans x reader #captain america x reader #steve x reader #steve rogers x you #marvel x reader #avengers x reader #chris evans x y/n #chris evans x you

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lokisprettygirl · 3 years ago

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Love is Selfless, It's Kind (Part 58) (Loki x Female Reader)

Summary : A day before your wedding to Loki, You can't help but get emotional.

Taglist : @colifower @rinacreateart @christineblood @the-wounded-healer05 @lokiprompts @geeky-politics-46 @sharklover927 @virtualstrawberrydinosaur @huntress-artemiss @rat-p1ss @snigdha-14 @daddylokisqueen @notmesimpingforanothabritishlad @nonsensicalobsessions

Tomorrow. You were getting married to the love of your life tomorrow. The way you had such ups and downs in your relationship with Loki. You never thought you'd make it to this point. But true love always finds a way so here you are. Since wanda insisted that you two shall stay away from each other, you two have been living in the tower itself. It has truly become another home to you two. Sometimes you think about immortality and how it would be like to outgrow all these people and it makes you sad but then you'd have him at least. He'd have you. You'd never leave him alone.

You didn't want a formal rehearsal dinner, what's the point? So You all got together instead and had a little party. Still hungover from last night, you just wanted to curl up to Loki and kiss the heck out of him but wanda didn't allow you.

When you reached the lounge and found him, he opened his arms instantly to engulf you into him "Mmm my pretty baby" you whispered softly and it made him blush "Beautiful princess I love you, I don't think I told you that today" he kissed your forehead and it made you tear up for some reason, everything made you emotional. You are getting married tomorrow.

"You did actually, you sent that text in the morning and then you said it three times on call" you giggled and like a clock wanda counted the minutes you had with him and took you away. You really needed to spend some time with him, you wanted to spend your last night as his girlfriend with him. Because from tomorrow you'd be his wife.

Everyone was there, Bucky brought his girlfriend Josie. Things were so good between them, Pepperony was pregnant, you finally got to meet Clint's wife Laura, Bruce and Nat were in the process of adopting a kid. Your best friend Wanda and her fiance Vis were set to be married next summer. After moving on from Aliksia's fiasco, Steve decided that he'd move on from Peggy and live his life to the fullest. Thor and Jane would get married soon as well, Eddie reconciled with his ex Anne. And Venom? Well he got to eat two baddies today with the side of Ferrero Rocher so he was extremely giddy.

Everything seemed normal for once, it seemed so perfect that you felt scared of jinxing it.

You looked at him as Wanda got drunk enough to lose hold on you, so he grabbed your arms and took you to the roof of the tower. He conjured a loveseat and you both laid down on it, he laid down on it, you just hid yourself between his arms. Even the stars aligned perfectly tonight.

"I have something for you" he said to you so you looked at him and smiled.

"I have something for you too" you kissed him softly, so soft but then it heated up. He grabbed the back of your head. Your hands ran through his chest, inching down more and more but you had to stop or you won't be able to. "Mmmm, we can't baby" you mumbled so he kissed you one more time and put his hand inside the pocket of his coat. Then he took a picture out of his pocket and gave it to you. "What's that?" You giggled as you took it from him and then you recognised it. It was from the day he came to the store a second time around, to see you again. He drove miles just to see you.

The Same day, You taught him how to use different features on his phone, and how to take selfies. It was the first ever picture you took with him. Your eyes teared up instantly as you looked at the photo, his eyes twinkling and he smiled so widely as he stood behind you "You look so happy here my sweet sweet boy" He was happy that day, happiest he had been in a long time.

He smiled then he placed his hand inside his pocket again and another picture came out. In this one he was looking at you while you looked at the camera "You see that's the moment, the moment I realized that you'd change my life forever and I wasn't wrong" he said to you and tears slipped down your cheeks, so he pulled you closer and wiped them with his lips softly.

You smiled and hugged him tightly "I want to frame it and place it in our bedroom" you told him "That would be perfect darling" he giggled and made them disappear in his vault.

"What do you have for me?" He asked you and you looked up as you sighed "I wanted to show this to you tomorrow but I think this is the perfect time" you smiled and you took your dress off your body. He was so confused for a second so he looked at you all perplexed, then you turned around and sat on your knees, so he traced his fingers from your back and went lower until he spotted the mark. The tattoo that you got. It was right above your tailbone, between your ample cheeks, just a few centimetres above.

"Ohh princess" he traced his fingers over the colorful tattoo, his signature golden horns with his name written between them. He rubbed his thumb over it again and again and the touch made you shiver "You like it? I wanted it somewhere only you'd be able to see" you giggled so he pulled you closer, he wrapped his arms around your chest and kissed on your neck softly "Fuckk I love it princess, you have my name engraved on your precious skin? Makes me feel all feral, like I own you" he whispered in your ear so you turned around to kiss him "You own me lo, owned me since I laid my eyes on you"

Then you kissed him until you both needed to pull away to breathe, he dressed you up magically again because the urge to run his lips over the mark and then make love to you was getting stronger every second.

"I can't wait to be Mrs Loki, officially and legally" you smiled as you both enjoyed the view above you. "I can't wait to be Mr. Y/n either" you giggled as you heard him. Then you teared up again as you thought about everything, you never thought you'd ever reach a place in your life where you'd have someone as loving as him by your side. He changed your life in all the ways you never could have imagined.

"I love you lo, more than love itself" you place a soft kiss on his forehead.

"I love you Princess, more than love itself"

You two stayed there for a while, basking in the beauty you two had in each other.

It will happen tomorrow. Your wedding to Loki Friggason and it will be perfect.

#loki #loki x female reader #loki x reader fluff #loki x reader #loki x reader insert #loki x reader angst #loki x you #loki x reader smut #loki x reader fic #soft loki

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boldlyvoid · 3 years ago

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Intro and masterlist

✨about me ✨

this is a mature blog, I trust all minors to be responsible and avoid everything marked NSFW!

NSFW sideblog: @pervstash-spencer

Hi! my name is emily, I'm 23 she/they

Capricorn, bisexual, non-binary, autistic, and I have fibromyalgia ✌🏻 overall just a fun time y'know.

ao3

i love: supernatural, star trek, marvel movies, criminal minds, this is us and grey's anatomy !!

Accepting requests for Spencer Reid x Reader fics currently

all my tags are listed below if you want to see other posts about said fics, also here is my Spotify for the fics <3

Dad!spencer Masterlist

First times Masterlist**

all links to my fics below the cut!

Updated: July 28th, 2021

** for smut

~~ for angst

Spencer Reid x Reader fics

Hypothetically**~ Ao3 | Tumblr -- 27 chapters, complete. 89k

reader and Spencer were friends in kindergarten, she watched him grow up and explore the world while she was still trying to catch up to him. now that they work together, they fall in love incredibly fast.

friends to lovers, case of the week style story

touch me**~ Ao3 | Tumblr 5.8k

Spencer is incredibly touch-starved and hard on himself since coming home from prison. Luckily, the medical examiner in this small town is really good at reading people, and exactly what he needs.

amethyst you so much P1 Ao3 | Tumblr 6.4k

Spencer has had a crush on Y/N since she started working at the bau. She only ever works the night shift after a case, handling all the aftermath gracefully. one night, Spencer stays back and they strike up a conversation about rocks, causing their feelings to dig a little deeper.

of quartz i will P2** Ao3 | Tumblr 6K

after 2 years of dating, Spencer decides it's finally time to get Y/N something to match her Amethyst bracelet.

Amoreena**~ Ao3 | Tumblr Completed 83k

Heaven is a real place and it's located exactly 14.6 miles away from the FBI, Quantico Headquarters. Off behind a small park, under a fantastical willow tree surrounded by wildflowers, in every colour young minds can imagine.

Don't forget, heaven also comes with angels.

Seven* Tumblr WIP

Summary: Spencer’s been married to Y/N for 7 years now, they have 7 children together and each one is going through something different. Spencer’s always wanted to be the best dad, now he gets to figure out how to be.

the guy at the rock show Ao3 | Tumblr 5.6K

Y/N lost their parents when they were 17, finding a new home and solace in Penelope Garcia and taking the Garcia name. They're the top forensic specialist in D.C, in a band and they drive a motorcycle... not to mention they are madly in love with the cute doctor who works with their sister.

journey to Camelot** Ao3 | Tumblr 3.8K

When Penelope introduces Spencer to online games, he expects to be spending his nights alone. Yet, somehow every time he comes back from a bad case, he logs on to chat with the ever so lovely user FairlyGwen and getting a lot more than just a helpful tip from her.

Exploration** Ao3 | Tumblr 4.7K

request: season1/2 spencer walking in on reader while she's watching porn in their shared hotel room

Expedition** Tumblr 1.2K

Summary: there's a first time for everything... including joining the mile high club with your boyfriend on the work jet.

10 Days Ao3 | Tumblr 1.4K

it's spencer's first father's day and he's extremely emotional about the little love of his life that he's only just met. he spends the day with his baby, Edwin, and his wife, crying and happy about how wonderful new little lives are.

ain't it fun?** Ao3 | Tumblr Masterlist 11K

reader just needs an NA meeting before they have a meltdown, they end up with the best friend they could ever make.

I'm not kidding!** Tumblr 6K

Spencer keeps getting little notes from a secret admirer, they're nice and sweet at first as they tease him with their crush until she's sending him notes about all the dirty things she wants to do to him

Perfect Timing** Tumblr 1K

spencer and reader have been spending the last month together in the same hotel room during a pretty brutal case. tension has been rising and she's completely in love with him.

what happens when they both think the other won't be back for a while and they want to shower?

Redamancy** Tumblr 5.4K

the co-op librarian at the FBI Academy has been secretly crushing on the smartest agent in the Bureau, TA, Doctor Spencer Reid, and he's been crushing on her too.

Being Neighbourly** Tumblr 1.9K

Request: reader is Spencers neighbour and she can hear him masturbating every night that he's home how do you have her deal with that?

Professional Hair Dresser (Ph.D)** Tumblr 6.4K

summary: after Spencer's knee injury, he starts visiting a salon every week to get his hair washed

36 Questions to Fall in Love Tumblr 8K

Summary: When Derek bets Spencer that he cant make someone fall in love with him in a week, he doesn’t expect Spencer to marry the girl the next day

New Romantics** Tumblr 23k

Summary: She needs help studying for her Case Exercises at the Academy, He needs a date for the annual Banquet... they just so happen to be neighbours who aren't afraid to lend a helping hand, or in this case, a helping kiss.

Million Dollar Man** | Tumblr WIP 5k so far

summary: Spencer's therapist recommended he branch out and meet new people who don't want to talk about his work... she didn't expect him to sign up for a Sugar Daddy website.

Sugar, Honey, Ice Tea** | Y/N version | 1-4, 5-9, Epilogue 25.6k

Summary: Fix-it-fic: Dr. Y/L/N and Savannah Hayes have been best friends since their medical internship at Bethesda General. When she receives a frantic call that Derek's best friend is being transferred to the prison she works at, an unlikely friendship bubbles.

Eventually falling head over heels for the innocent man.

Warnings: Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Prison, Prison Violence, Assault, Blood, Depression, Murder, Self-Hatred, Hurt Spencer Reid, Canon-Typical Violence, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Drug Addiction, References to Drugs, Drug Use, Idiots in Love, Mutual Pining, Romantic Tension, Forbidden Love, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Strangers to Lovers, Requited Love, Falling In Love, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Slow Burn, Eventual Smut, past abusive relationship, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault

Spencer x Ethan

Ruin it.** Tumblr 5.4K

Summary: Spencer never had sleepovers as a kid, so now that he's an adult he's always sleeping over at Ethan's house, ad he'll take any excuse to crawl into bed beside him.

Warnings: mutual pining, love concessions, blowjobs, handjobs, anal sex (both top and bottom spencer in this), childhood friends to lovers

400 Celebration fics

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Spencer has noticed a beautiful woman at a spirituality booth at the farmers market every Saturday for almost a whole year now. he finally asks her to give him a reading.

mystery of love Tumblr 700

Spencer surprises his wife with a trip to Italy.

Spy Kids Tumblr 900

Spencer and Y/N's kids think that they are secretly spies and request a mission story before bed.

a father's greatest weakness Tumblr 1K

Princess Y/N is betrothed to the Viking king in an effort by her father to keep the peace between their countries, he doesn't expect her to join in the fight to free Scottland.

Luke x Reader

Best Dad Ever 2.8K

Request: angst with a happy ending, reader and luke have been divorced for a few years but have a child, she tries and tries to fall out of love with him but he's around so often that she can't

Spencer x OC

Sugar Honey Ice Tea** Ao3 | WIP 9/10 chapters complete 25.6K

Fix-it-fic: Dr. Beth Pattinson and Savannah Hayes have been best friends since their medical internship at Bethesda General. When she receives a frantic call that Derek's best friend is being transferred to the prison she works at, an unlikely friendship bubbles.

Eventually falling head over heels for the innocent man.

Intro to Criminal Minds: Why They Did It Ao3 | Tumblr WIP 6K+

Spencer is teaching a 7-week seminar on the most interesting criminal cases, explaining their actions to understand why they took place. Only, not everyone in the audience is a student.

Criminal Minds x Mindhunter AU

Spencer x OC Peggy Carr

Franklin x Reader

Voulez-Vouz** | 3.2k

Summary: in a small town, everyone knows each other… or at least they think they do.

Warnings: porn with plot, smut, Dom reader, Sub!Perv!franklin, making out, teasing, face sitting, oral (female and male), hand jobs, overstimulation, prostate message, multiple orgasms, penetrative sex, unprotected sex, let me know if I forgot anything.

Chip x Reader

forever is the sweetest con** | 6.2K

Summary: Reader’s dad is a carpenter; sometimes he takes on apprentices and sometimes, if they’re lucky, they get his daughter’s number at the end of their training. Chip Taylor, however, hits the jackpot when her father invites him over for one of her homecooked meals.

Warnings: reader’s mom passed away, mentions of parental death, strangers to lovers, random acts of kindness, mutual pining, falling in love, steamy make-outs, oral sex (male and female receiving), fingering, penetrative sex, unprotected sex, creampie, dirty talk, sub!chip, food mentions, praise, love confessions.

Raymond x Reader

Alone Together ** | 2.4K

Summary: Raymond moves into a haunted house and ends up sleeping with the ghost who lives there... only he doesn't know that when you fuck a ghost you also become one.

Warnings: details of suicide and murder, blowjobs, pegging, bottom!raymond, top!reader, becoming a ghost, major character death.

Star Trek Masterlist

Star Wars fix it fic

Supernatural masterlist

thanks for all the love, as always,

-Emily <3

502 notes · View notes

mysticalrambling · 3 years ago

Note

Hello

I m new on your blog and read your work and i fell in love with your stories. I read you were interested in taking request so can you take my request too? I was wondering if you can write a steve rogers x reader, where y/n is his girlfriend and he leaves her after civil war and then they see each other in infinity war, he tries to patchup with her but she ignores him because in past he often compared her to peggy and also because she knew about him kissing sharon and she is hurt. During the fight she doesn't talks to him and when tony returns from space she still continues to ignore Steve and when he confronts her she snaps at him for hurting her for a long time. He apologizes and somehow they makeup and also him kissing sharon was misunderstanding because sharon kissed him. And then they are happy together and also in endgame the reader is worried steve will stay in past but he comes back and they get married with the team present and have kids and live happily

Happily Ever After (S.R)

A/N: Thank you so much lovely and I loved the plot line. I loved writing about it and I made a few additions to the story. Hope you like it and I am open to more requests.

Steve Rogers Fanfiction (Fanfiction Master List)

Summary: Steve comes back after Civil War and you are angry with him because he left you. You do not forgive him because you thought he cheated on you and he always compared you with Peggy. But he returns from the past when he chose you over Peggy and you forgive him. You eventually get married and expand your family.

Warnings: Angst but eventual fluff.

._._._._.

He stood right there in his Captain America shield with all his former glory. Your ex boyfriend looked the same but there were some differences like he had a full grown beard and he was more muscular. He kept staring at you with longing and pain but it was not even the half of what you experienced while he was gone.

“(Y/N), you need to take the position left to Steve.” Tony pulled you out of your trance and you just stared at him when you comprehended his order. He had been there for you from the moment Steve left you after the Civil War. Sitting with you when you couldn’t sleep at night and forcefully feeding you when you spent the whole day starving. He didn’t want you anywhere near Captain but you both always worked best together and there were much more important matters at hand.

“But Tony, I can be with Steve.” As much as Rhodey wanted to be away from all of the people that were responsible for his fall, he didn’t want you to suffer. They all had seen you fall apart on the Avenger base when you realised that your boyfriend left without saying good bye to you and without an explanation. Just telling Tony on a voice message to take care of you wasn’t enough.

“I’ll be okay, Rhodey. You are needed near the buildings so if some of the aliens escape our defenses, you can be there to protect the city.”

All of the avengers kept stealing glances at the both of you because they knew that it was only a matter of time before you exploded. But they were wrong. You were not the stubborn, hot headed woman that did not let anyone walk over her. That woman died when Steve left. He took her with himself.

"Take your positions and give them hell." Steve and you made your way towards your designated place.

"(Y/N), listen to me. I-"

"Do not talk to me. We are done." Keeping your eyes trained on the path, you avoided meeting his eyes.

"But, let me explain. I did not have a choice. You sided with Tony and I couldn't tell you that we were leaving." He tried to catch up with you but you were a woman on a mission.

"I did not side with Tony, I sided with the accords. And I was working my ass off to get you all out of there and I looked like a fool in the end." He collided in you as you abruptly stopped in your tracks.

"(Y/N), I didn't know-"

"You didn't know because you never tried to contact me. I was the one who had to go through multiple trials with the government because they thought I helped you all to escape." There were tears pooling in your eyes and Steve wanted to kill himself for being the cause. "I was benched for four months, for Gods sake."

You are reminded of those horrible times when you didn't know what your next step was going to be. The others tried to help you but you had to suffer through all the criticism alone. Some days you just wanted to leave it all behind and start a new life. But you weren't a coward. You wouldn't let anyone run over you like this and ruin your life. Getting back up was tough but you managed it. The day that you were allowed back on the field was the day that you decided you were not going to let anyone ruin your life.

"(Y/N), I made a mistake and I missed you so much." He tried to touch you but you flinched. A look of hurt passed his eyes and retracted his hands.

"Let's just fight. I want to kick some ass." The war crafts soon landed and you all got to fight. You had to admit that Steve was one of the best teammate that you had. He knew when to defend you and when to let you attack. You were busy fighting two of the aliens when one came from the back. Steve saw it and immediately came to your defense. You were never going to admit it but you missed this.

When the fight ended, you both made your way towards the main compound and saw all the avengers gathered together. Steve and you only had minor cuts throughout your body but nothing major. The moment you saw what all the commotion is about, your breath hitched. It was Tony with half of his skin burnt and taking his last breath.

Kneeling down beside him, you started crying. "Hey, it's okay. Just be happy and do not hold on to old grudges. Take care of family for me, please." Pepper was beside you and she started crying harder when she heard him. "Steve, come here for a second."

"I am so sorry for everything. You will always be my friend, Stark."

"We both were in the wrong, Cap. For what it's worth, do not lose (Y/N) because she is the best thing that has happened to you."

Tony was on his last breaths now and you both moved aside because Pepper wanted to have some last moments with him. There were some rifts in the team since the civil war but at this moment, you all were in this together. Tony was the one who brought you all together and saved many of you from your abusive lives. He was your best friend and you didn't know how you would spend your life without his sarcastic comments and his new inventions.

"You go, Tony. We are going to be okay. I love you." The words that left Pepper were a mere whisper but because of the pin drop silence, you were able to hear her.

"I love you too," Uttering his last words, he finally closed his eyes and all that could be heard were Pepper's wails of agony. Everything after it was a blur; the med bay, the briefing, the funeral. Time seemed to pass you by and you were numb the whole time. It was like a large piece of your heart was torn away from you and you didn't know how to react.

"(Y/N), can we talk?" Natasha lightly knocked on your door before you muttered a small come in. She looked around the room and noticed the lack of pictures in your room. The warmth that once radiated from your room was now gone. There were pictures of you with the team, with Steve and with Natasha. You liked to capture all the memories and it was one of the things the team loved about you.

"Hi."

"Hello. I just wanted to see how you were doing after everything."

"I am fine. Just processing everything." The loose thread on your blanket was the main focus of your attention right now.

"You don't seem fine. I know you, (Y/N)."

"No, you don't." Scoffing at her ridiculous statement, you felt anger bubbling inside your chest. "You were one of the first people who became my friend when I came to this tower. You knew I couldn't live without Chris and you. You both were my support system."

"(Y/N), I wanted to tell you everything. Believe me, I did. But we had to keep it a secret because we had to protect the other avengers as well."

"I have been listening to this reason from the past few days and I am done. I was ready to help you guys and you could have just contacted me once. I didn't know if you were dead or alive."

"I am sorry. I wanted to do it but it was never the right time. Half of the times you were surrounded by government officials. Can you forgive me?" The red head came and sat next to you on the bed.

"I can but I don't know if we can go back to the way things were."

"It's okay. We will be friends again. And as a new friend, I just want to tell you that Steve was miserable these past two years and he loves you so much."

"I don't want to talk about him, Nat. Let's go to the gym and spar."

"I am going to kick your ass as alway, (Y/L/N)."

"I have been practicing, Romanoff." You both went on to sparring and Natasha won in the end. However, the whole day you kept thinking about your ex boyfriend. He had been trying to talk to you from the past two weeks. It was hard for you to ignore him but you were now reminded of the times when he compared you with Peggy.

The small things that you did was always met with criticism like Peggy did not work in the field like this or Peggy wouldn't talk to him like a brat. Apparently, she was the mature one and you could never compare to her. Most of the times, you tried not to let the comments get to you but you were human. He might have done it unintentionally and you didn't want to hold it against him. But it hurt.

"We are going to talk today and you are not going to run away this time." He blocked you in the kitchen when you came out of your room to drink some water.

"Funny how you are saying that I am the one that is running away. Hypocrite much now, are we?"

"(Y/N), I am apologising to you because I can't live without you."

"You did so well for two years, I don't know why it is a problem now."

"I understand that you are angry with me. I wanted to be with you so bad but my duty as Captain prevented me from it." Your face was turned away from Steve but you turned towards him when you heard the words leave his mouth.

"Your job is more important than me?" Enraged, all you could see was red and you wanted to punch the daylights out of him.

"I thought it was but not anymore. You are the most important thing in my life and I don't want to lose you."

"Well, you have other women in your life so you don't need me."

"What other women?" Steve's confused gaze swept over your face when you spit those words out.

"I know about Sharon. You kissed her when we were still together. You cheated on me and I hate you for it." Pointing your fingers at his chest, you didn't realise when your voice started to rise.

Steve held your hands and pulled you close to his chest. "Sharon kissed me and I immediately backed off. I would never cheat on you."

You couldn't believe your ears right now. This was one of the things that helped you get over Steve. Believing that he cheated on you, made it a lot easier for you to despise him. Granted that never happened but it was still easier. However, he was still stuck in the past and he did not want to admit it.

"Even if Sharon is not a problem, you are still stuck in the past."

"What do you mean?"

"You are still in love with Peggy and I can not be your second choice anymore."

"Peggy has got nothing to do with this. She is dead and I love you."

"But I would have never been the one you loved if Peggy was here."

"That's not true. You both are totally different people and I love you now." Steve didn't know how to explain it to you. The things he felt for you were totally different for what he felt for Peggy. You made his breath hitch and his heart pounded whenever you smiled at him. He was so in love with you that he didn't think it was possible to love someone this much.

He knew that he compared you with Peggy before he left but at that time he was not ready to leave the past. It was unfair of him to do that to you while you tried very hard to meet all his expectations. However, he realised afterwards that you did not have to meet any of his expectations because you exceeded all of them. He felt so guilty and he just wanted to have you back in his life and forget about all the things that happened.

"I don't believe you."

"Please do. I want us to be okay before I go to return all the stones."

"You do that and then we can talk about us." He gave you a quick peck on the cheek before you could say anything. You were pretty sure that would stay back with Peggy and that's why you didn't want to reconcile things. You didn't want him to break your heart again.

"Ready to go, Cap?" Scott asked as he rechecked the time machine again. Everyone glanced at each other when he said that because they all thought that Steve might remain in the past for Peggy. They all had their doubts but everyone was scared to say them out loud. "You only have five seconds to get back before you are stuck."

"Ready." He glanced at you one last time and stepped in to the machine. You held your breath as Scott counted out loud and when he reached the number four, you were sure that he wasn't coming back. You were about to turn back when a snapping sound echoed throughout the room.

"I told you I will come back." Coming to a halt right in front of you, you couldn't believe your eyes. You pulled him in and kissed him ferociously.

"I love you."

"I love you too and remember that no one compares to you. I am really sorry."

"It's okay. You passed the test." When you both kissed again, all of your friends cheered for you.

As time passed by, you realised that Steve was the best person you could have possibly ended up. He was the literally the man of your dreams. Waking up to him every morning, cuddled up in your bed to going to bed with him kissing you goodnight. Steve made you breakfast every morning even when he was getting late and weekends were only reserved you.

The day that he proposed was still so clear on your mind. You remembered how he was nervous for a week that you thought something was seriously wrong with him. He would stutter and sweat when you got too close to him like it was a new relationship. There was a barbecue for the whole team on the compound and you all were gathered around the garden with drinks in hand. Everyone was enjoying it to the fullest when out of nowhere Steve knelt in front of you with a ring in his hand. After listening to his speech, you said yes with tears in your eyes.

"Are you ready?" Natasha asked you as she smoothed down your wedding dress that you spent months picking out.

"Yes." Pepper helped Morgan with the flower basket because the seven year old wanted to be the flower girl.

"Okay, then it's time." Walking down the aisle was worth it when you saw the adoration flicker in his eyes. He said some of the most heart warming words that had you ruining your eye makeup. It was a beautiful ceremony that only included close family and friends. You wanted a private wedding and you announced it to the world the next day. They all went crazy but the positive response was overwhelming to say the least.

Four months in to the wedding, you realised you were pregnant. Natasha was the one who sat beside when you waited for the test while Pepper brought a million of them for you. You were scared to tell him because you never discussed the possibility of having kids in detail.

"Just tell him. He is going to be ecstatic." Natasha tried to soothe you when you started crying with your face in between your hands.

"Okay. Steve will be home anytime soon."

"We should probably get going." Pepper and Natasha made their way towards the door and gently closed it.

"Hey, babe." Kissing you on the cheek, he immediately went to the washroom to take a shower.

"We need to talk."

"Sure. What's up?"

"I am pregnant." Blurting it out was not what you had planned but you couldn't think of another way. He stopped folding his armor midway and just looked at you with disbelief in his eyes.

"Are you serious? Oh my god. When did you find out? I am so happy, baby."

"I found out about an hour ago. And you are seriously happy?"

"Of course, I am. We will have a mini you or me with us in nine months. I love you, baby."

"I love you too." Keeping his hands on your stomach, he hugged you tightly and you knew that you got your happy ending. You were one of the luckiest people alive because you have a husband like Steve and now you were going to have family with him.

Hope you guys enjoyed it!!

._._._._.

A/N: I love Captain America and I was happy to write a fanfiction about him. If you guys have any more request, I will be happy to write about them and message me if you want to be added to the tag list.

Taglist: @justile

Like, comment and reblog.

._._._._.

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wienerbarnes · 4 years ago

Text

A Certain Romance (2/6)

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Word Count: 1,685

Warnings: not rlly anything

A/N: a lil bit of a deeper dive for these two’s relationship👀... enjoy!

MAIN MASTERLIST | A CERTAIN ROMANCE MASTERLIST

Your apartment is nice. Very you.

Sam invited him out to some restaurant, but after the last one he suggested, he decided to pass. And when Sam asked him what he was doing instead, if he was seeing you, Bucky lied and said yes. It made Sam happy and got him out of going to another ridiculous restaurant, so he saw it as a win-win.

Once Sam left, though, his thoughts did drift to what you were doing.

You two exchanged numbers at the pizza place after your date, but you two haven’t texted much. He texted you making sure you got home safe, which you did, and a day or so after, you texted him a picture of some advertisement with an awfully cheesy pick-up line written on it, which even he agreed was awful.

But that’s about it. So, he texts you.

Hey. What are u doing?

About to make dinner. Y?

Told Sam I was seeing u. Wanna hang out?

Come over.

Simple enough, he thinks.

You two haven’t had the most meaningful text conversations, clearly, but it’s still nice. No flirting, no typing and retyping messages in order to hook, line, and sinker, no ghosting. No relationship texting.

It was a dream for him. To have a new friend. He’s made plenty of friends, both in New York and in Wakanda. But it’s all under the same… umbrella. Always an agent, a fighter, an analyst of some sort. Someone to train with, to fight with, to fight for. Never someone like you. Someone that works a mundane job and lives in a mundane part of New York where her weekends are filled with going on mundane blind dates or otherwise cooking dinner for one.

It’s a breath of fresh air to not talk about fighting or missions or press or media or anything else he has to hear about at work. The only connection you have with Sam is that you met in a coffee shop a few years ago that has since closed down. He was one of your first friends here.

You could care less about Captain America, too. Which hurts Sam’s ego, and in turn, makes Bucky smile.

So, he goes over to yours.

He’s not sure what you’re making, but he brings a bottle of red wine as a courtesy. You are making dinner after all. Besides, women love wine, right?

Your apartment is nice. Very you.

Enough going on to show that someone does indeed live here, but also enough to show that you’re not exactly swimming in riches, like most people that live in this city.

The place smells like garlic and basil, and he’s glad that he brought the wine.

Shoes discarded at the door, he helps chop up the rest of the ingredients while you put a pot of water to boil. He chops up mushrooms, onion, pancetta, eyeing the bottle of vodka out on the table and tube of tomato paste next to his hand.

It's an understatement to say he’s excited. Most of the pasta he makes is from a bag of precooked noodles and a jar of tomato sauce.

Basic small talk floats through the air as the two of you dance around one another in the kitchen. Even though you’re “dating”, you don’t know much about each other. This isn’t too uncommon from how dating was for Bucky when he was a teenager; you’d marry women knowing very little about them.

Your favorite color is orange. You played violin in grade school. You had a childhood dog named Chowder. Bucky tells you his favorite color is green. He played a little bit of piano when he was younger, but did boxing in his late teens and early twenties before the war. You poke fun at him when he can’t remember the name of his own childhood dog.

“He’s probably rolling over in dog-heaven.”

“Good boy; he’d deserve a treat.”

You laugh.

Easy conversation continues on the couch as bowl after bowl of pasta is eaten and replenished. As fun and seemingly simple questions are asked, like each of your favorite movies or whether or not you pour the milk before the cereal, the room that’s left is used for deeper questions.

“What’s your most embarrassing moment?” You ask him.

He thinks for a moment before opening his mouth, only to close it again. “One time when Princess Shuri was fixing my arm it wasn’t secure completely, so it flew off while I was playing with some of the children.”

“That’s not your most embarrassing moment. I know it’s not, now you have to tell me what it really is.” You tease him.

He’s never been the best liar.

“You’re right, it’s not my most embarrassing moment. My actual most embarrassing moment is just kind of… sad. And I didn’t want to ruin the mood or anything.” He explains, hoping you’ll accept that but instead you give him an encouraging smile to hopefully give him some comfort that whatever it is he wants to tell you is safe in your apartment.

“Okay, uhm. So, in the 40’s, after I was rescued by Steve, but before we shipped out again where I was recaptured for the second and final time. We were all holed up in this little dance club, all the soldiers and their gals. And in walks Peggy Carter in a pretty red dress,” He begins, only glancing at your eyes periodically as if to make sure you’re still there.

“I know she’s Steve’s gal, he told me all about her. I wasn’t flirting with her because I wanted her, I was flirting with her… to make sure I still could. I mean, after being held in that… place… they injected me with stuff, told me things that weren’t true, I mean Steve told me I was repeating my number over and over again when he found me, I didn’t even remember doing that. I felt… violated, used, not like myself. I felt like I wasn’t me anymore.

“So, when Peggy walked in, I thought about how everyone always called me a ladies man, how good I was with women, I mean, I’d take girls out about every damn weekend, you know? I wanted to feel normal, so I flirted with her, tried to get her to dance with me. And she completely ignored me. She never even took her eyes off of Steve. It’s like I was invisible. And it just sort of felt like the nail in the coffin for whoever James Barnes was before the war. It was a realization that I’m never going to be that person again. And it was embarrassing for me.” He explains.

He hasn’t looked up at you again, but he heard your fork stop moving around your bowl a minute or so ago. He feels a lump in his throat thinking about that time, how he knew he’d never get back the man he was, even before knowing what was in store for him after falling off that train. How he used to be this man that wanted a long, happy marriage, six or seven kids running around a big backyard, a white picket fence surrounding a big two-story house in a neighborhood of identical homes. He wanted the cheesy life, at one point. But the same man that wanted that life died falling off a train many years ago.

All of that’s forgotten, though, when you open your mouth, and seem to say the perfect thing to make him feel better.

“One time in the third grade, this girl pulled my skirt down in front of my crush, and I wasn’t wearing any undies.”

A snort escapes his throat as you, somehow, after he’s shared something so deeply personal, something he never even told Steve or Sam about, still found a way to make him laugh. Which is what he wanted, he realizes. The comfort of moving on from that confession and not having to wallow in it like other people would try to. His hand leaves his fork to cover his face as tears threaten to leak out from how hard he’s laughing.

He took that secret to the grave, even if it wasn’t his own. He told himself he’d never tell Steve about how he felt in that situation, and he never did. He never told Steve that he didn’t enlist, either. He couldn’t imagine how Steve would’ve felt knowing that the army would’ve rather taken men that didn’t want to go to war, men who were terrified to go to war, had too much to lose and wanted to be selfish and stay home, than men like Steve who would do anything to enlist. Including lying on the damn enlistment form.

He wonders if Steve is looking at him now. Watching over him as he shares something that he never did with his best friend, with you, a girl he’s met barely a week ago, on your couch over bowls of pasta while he points out leftover sauce on the corner of your lip.

“What’s your greatest fear?” He asks you next.

“Dying alone. Actually, no. Getting kidnapped, probably.”

“Oh, mine’s spiders.” He shares.

It’s so easy to laugh with you, he finds. He jokes with Sam a lot, all the bickering and teasing all in good fun at the end of the day, and it’s mostly pretty funny. But laughing with you. He feels like a teenager again. Somehow, everything is funny; he doesn’t remember the last time he’s laughed so much, especially about things that aren’t even that funny.

It’s raining at the end of the night. Early morning, rather.

“You can take the couch, if you’d like.”

“Nah, I don't mind a little rain, and I like the ride home.” He fed Alpine before he left, but he imagines his cat misses him, even if she’s probably busy licking herself to even notice he’s left.

“Suit yourself.”

You don’t push him. A simple pleasure that’s more of a luxury for him. There’s no pushing or convincing or Are you sure’s with you.

Certainly a luxury, you are.

#bucky barnes #bucky x reader #bucky barnes series #bucky barnes au #marvel

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notcaring99 · 4 years ago

Text

Love You In the Dark (Steve Rogers x Female Reader)

Warnings: Sadness overload

Ft: Bucky, Sam, Bruce, Guardians, Thor, and Wanda

Request: “steve x reader he left the reader to be w peggy. a sad one but happy ending please!!! ty🥺💕”

A/N: I am going to be completely honest I cried while writing this. I didn’t know how to end it happily, but I did my best. I hope you all enjoy it and cried like I did! Also I didn’t read it through before posting because I was scared I was going to cry again. Thank you for the support and keep sending in those requests I am happy to do them! I suggest you listen to Love In The Dark by Adele and Are You With Me by nilu while reading really gets you in the feels.

Steve and you have been through the hell of it. Loki’s army back in 2012 when you guys first fought with aliens to fighting Thanos’ army full of aliens. Through it all though you two were able to confide in each other bringing each other reassurance and love.

After the snap, you and Steve got married though you wanted other people there as well, you decided to live your life to the fullest for them. Your next step in life was to have a kid, but you couldn’t get pregnant. You went to many doctors who told you you were perfectly fertile and that stress could have a factor. Steve reassured you it would happen when the time is right.

“Y/N please don’t cry,” Steve whispers to you as his strong arms wrap around you tightly. Your tears kept flowing as you nuzzled deeper into Steve’s chest trying to calm your tears. “You will get pregnant, I promise.” Steve whispers kissing the top of your head. You push away from him looking into his baby blue eyes.

“You can’t promise things like that.” You whisper to him looking away from his eyes as you wrap your arms around your stomach. “You can’t promise something that is clearly unwanted by the universe.” His fingers graze up your arms to be under your chin lifting it up ever so gently.

“I will do everything in my power to make you happy whether it is to have a kid or watch those dreadful shows you like to watch,” you laugh as Steve makes a disgusted face before smiling at your beautiful smile. “I will do whatever you ask of me.” you smile at the man you love before wrapping your arms around his neck bringing him closer to you. You kiss him so passionately and he holds you tightly deepening the kiss.

You were so happy to have such an amazing man. You were so lucky to have him, and hoped he thought the same of you. You used to think that you two would survive anything, that is until Tony and Banner figured out time travel. Steve looked like he was in deep thought after the funeral as Bruce asked everyone who would return the stones to their rightful time line.

Everyone scattered as they all said they would think about it. Steve left you as you talked with Bruce, Sam and Bucky after the discussion about how important the stones are. You watched as Steve walked towards the lake, not listening to the three men talking. “Y/N?” you snap out of it looking at the three men that are looking at you.

“I am sorry, what did you say?” you ask the men making Bucky and Sam look at Steve then to you.

“What is going on between you two?” Bucky asks you sincerely concerned about his best friend and his wife. You look at Bucky seeing the concern before looking at Steve.

“I think he wants to ask something from me, but can’t.” You whisper out before taking a deep breath as tears well up in your eyes. You push your tears away before looking at the three men looking at you with full blown panic on their faces. “I’ll be back, okay?” Your eyes betray you as tears fall steadily down your face. Sam is about to stop you, but Bucky holds him back as you turn towards Steve who is staring at the lake still. You take another breath regretting your selfless heart right now.

You force your feet to walk towards Steve as you examine your left hand where the ring and a promise was made. When there was no hope to go back. When Steve thought he couldn’t go back to his true love. When he thought you were now his new future. You remember when he proposed.

It was a summer in Paris, France. A dream place for any girl to be with her boyfriend. But you two were hiding from the governments, so there was no looking at the tourist attractions. The team is held up in a hotel that no one would ever look for you there. It was your shift for look out with Steve. You were on the roof looking at the view of Paris. The Eiffel tower standing tall and bright as the night settled. People are either on their way home from drinking or asleep as cars were scarce on the streets.

It was around 4am, almost time for your nightly shift to end and you to be asleep. Steve was on the ground doing a perimeter check for suspicious activity before meeting you back on the roof. You are sitting on one of the elevated cement blocks on the roof, letting your feet dangle as you looked out. Wondering what life would be like if you didn’t meet Steve. “What are you doing, day dreaming?” you jump slightly at the voice before looking behind you. You see Steve standing there looking tired but so handsome. He looked a bit more jittery than normal as he climbs his way to the elevated block.

“You know me, always day dreaming.” You smile at him as you scoot over so he can sit beside you. He plops down beside you before pecking your lips and grabbing your hands. You smile as he blows hot air on your chilly hands. “Any bad guys out there?” you ask him as he rubs your hands. He shakes his head before dropping your hands.

“Nope. I still feel bad that you are on the run with us.” Steve whispers out looking at you with pure sadness. You shake your head taking his hand in yours making him look at you.

“I am not. I get to be with you and my friends.” you tell him before leaning your head on his shoulder. “Plus it’s every girls dream to be in Paris with her boyfriend.” he chuckles lowly before kissing the top of your head.

“If we weren’t on the run, it would be the most romantic trip.” Steve tells you and you smile looking at your intertwined hands to see his shaking slightly. You bring both your hands to surround his one.

“What would we be doing if we were in Paris and not on the run?” you ask him as you look at your hands not wanting to look at his eyes. He wraps his hand around your grouped ones before pushing slightly off of you. He is looking at you with a big smile on his face.

“I would bring you everywhere. Take you to all the tourist attractions.” you smile at him as he stands up bring you up with him. “We would go to some fancy restaurant, probably the one in front of the Eiffel tower. Then I would dance with you under the lights of the city in the middle of the plaza.” You giggle as he begins to dance with you bringing you close to his chest.

“Sounds perfect.” You whisper out leaning your head on his shoulder as he swayed you both. You sway like this for a moment before Steve pulls away grabbing both your hands. “What is wrong?” you ask noticing how nervous he is.

“Then I would get on one knee.” Steve kneels down on the elevated platform looking at you. Your heart rate picks up as he is still holding is hands. “When I woke up to this decade, I thought I lost the only love I would ever have,” You smile sadly at his words before he squeezed your hands. “But then I met you. You were so beautiful. You reminded me of love that I didn’t think I had in me anymore. You woke up that love inside me.” You smile at his words before he digs in his pocket making your heart rate pick up. He opens the box to reveal a ring that had diamonds surrounding the band and one bigger one sat in the middle. “So would you Y/N Y/M/N Y/L/N, marry me?” you were crying full on as you nodded your head.

“Yes!” he smiled putting the ring gracefully on your finger before wrapping his arms around you lifting you above him slightly. You put your hands on either side of his face kissing him passionately as he spun you guys around.

When you approach him, he doesn’t turn around knowing you are there. You place your shaky hand on top of his shoulder, using him as support as you climb over the roots to be by his side. “You know I never thought I would be the one to say this,” you whisper out to him. Steve glances at you as tears form in his blue eyes already knowing what you are going to say.

“Y/N, you have to know that I love you and always will.” Steve tells you turning your way, but you turn to the water looking at your left hand with the ring that sat there for so long. The ring he picked out with Sam and Bucky before Thanos came along.

“We both know you don’t belong here, Steve.” you tell him as tears are falling from your eyes. You look at the ring one more time before turning your eyes away from the lake to Steve who is looking at you with tears in his eyes. You grab his hands as he shakes his head.

“I-I can’t do this to you.” Steve whispers out to you lowering his head. You shush him bringing him into a hug where he cried into your shoulder. Your own heart is breaking but you know Steve’s is breaking more. You knew that he could never do this, so you had to be the one.

“It’s okay. It’s okay.” You whisper to him rubbing his back for a moment. You take a shaky breath before separating from the hug. You take Steve’s head in your hands with a small smile on your face. “This is the right thing. You love her, and you need to be with her.” you wipe his tears with your thumbs gently before letting your hands fall to his shoulders and down his arms to his hands. You place the ring in his hand and close his fist making him close his eyes tightly.

“Y/N-” you cut him off by shushing him. You hold his fist close before bring your other hand up to rest on his cheek. He leans into your touch, keeping your hand there with his free one. His eyes rest on you, as you try to hold it together as much as you can.

“Tell Peggy she is one lucky gal.” You whisper to him before pulling away from him. He looks at you sadly as you turn back to the house where everyone is at watching you two with curious eyes. You hold your head high before walking to the group that grew with the Guardians and Thor included.

“I am detecting feelings of sadness and lost.” Mantis states making the others glare at the girl, but I smile at her as the tears kept falling.

“You are right.” I whisper out before taking a breath and looking at Bruce who looks at me sadly. “He will take the stones back for you.” You sniffle before looking at the group as a whole. All of them looking at you with pity and sympathy. “Now if you’ll excuse me. I need to go find a new mission to keep myself busy.” you croak out before walking away from the group. Wanda sees your retreating figure and quickly brings you out to a distant part of the house where you both cry as she holds you tightly.

Today is the day that Steve is leaving and you are walking out into the forest to meet them. You needed to see him one last time. Steve on the other hand was saying his goodbyes to Bucky. “Can you promise me something?” Steve asks Bucky as Sam and Bruce are talking. Bucky gave him a look already knowing what Steve needed.

“Anything for you.” Bucky tells him truthfully. Steve smiles before putting a hand on his shoulder.

“Take care of her for me. Make sure that she is okay.” Steve states and Bucky looks at him sadly as they hear footsteps behind them. Bucky looks past Steve to see you with your hands in your pockets standing there with red eyes as you look at Steve and him.

“Of course.” Bucky whispers to his buddy before gesturing behind him. “But you better say thank you before leaving.” Steve looks at you then at Bucky.

“This is going to be hard.” Steve whispers out before walking over to you. Your heart beat was unsteady as you watch him in the metal suit walking towards you. “I didn’t think you would be here.” Steve tells you as he stands in front of you. You smile sadly shrugging your shoulders.

“Just needed to make sure your ass actually did it.” you tell him jokingly making him smile at you sadly as tears fall. “You know I don’t hold any resentment towards you.” Steve nods his head smiling at you sadly as tears fall from his eyes as well.

“Even if I asked Bucky to watch over you, you still feel no resentment?” Steve asks you making you chuckle before holding up a two fingers to show little.

“Just a little bit now.” you both laugh before Bruce calls to Steve. You turn to Steve with a smile on your face. “Just make sure not to do anything too idiotic while I am not by your side. I love you Steve Rogers. Always and forever..” he nods his head before pulling you into him by one arm. He kisses you passionately before pulling away leaning his forehead on yours.

“Always and forever.” he whispers before walking away leaving you a bit weak at the sudden kiss. You regain your composure as he climbs into the middle of the time travel machine.

“Y/N,” Bucky is by your side as Bruce begins to count down. Tears fall from your eyes as Steve flashes out. Bruce tries to bring Steve back, but he doesn’t come back.

“Where is he?” Sam asks and you shake your head as tears fall.

“He is with her.” you whisper out making them all turn to you. You choke back your tears looking away from the group to the lake. You see an old man with a shield sitting on a bench looking out.

“Bucky, is that-” Sam is cut off by Bucky who nods his head.

“Go ahead.” Bucky wraps an arm around me as Sam walks to Steve. “Are you okay?” he asks you putting his hands on either side of your shoulder. You look at him as you dry your tears.

“I am happy he was happy.” you whisper out and Bucky smiles at you sadly wiping your tears. “I really am happy for him.” you whisper out and Bucky nods his head.

“I know.” Bucky hugs you tightly making you hug him back. “How about we head back to the house? We can figure out the next steps together.” Bucky suggests to you and you hum in response as you hear a throat being cleared. You both pull away to see Sam standing there with the sheild.

“What am I not included in the steps?” Sam asks and you laugh bringing him into a hug. You pull away keeping an arm wrapped around his shoulder dragging him over to Bucky.

“Of course you are. Let’s get you two rowdy asses to the house.” You laugh wiping your tears as you bring both guys under your arms. They laugh as you guys follow behind Bruce to the house.

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