#no reblogs please

[return-of-the-trinidude]

Once in a lifetime picture of me. If you miss this you'll never see it again

[randomactsofpigeon]

Extremely personal post below:

It's no secret to anyone who has any kind of mild interest in my life that my husband and I have been dealing with infertility. At the start of this year, we learned it would be impossible to use my eggs because my body does not respond well to IVF. Around mid-year, we also learned it would be impossible to use my husband's sperm, which we already knew to be very poor in count and quality. So our remaining options are embryo adoption or regular adoption. Even among the population of people suffering from infertility, this is a pretty shitty end of the stick.

When I've talked about this with close friends, I've said that it feels like somebody died, only it was somebody who never really existed and who was only ever real to me. And I stand by that. It feels like a death.

My mother crochets. My mother also has a really hard time dealing with emotions, her own or other people's. It's made it very difficult for me to talk about this experience with her. She made baby blankets for all of my siblings' kids. Several months ago, I was trying to explain to her and how all this felt, and I said a particularly hard part about it was I don't have anything tangible. I'm grieving something but there are no artifacts of grief, just a pile of IVF paraphernalia.

Anyway, I don't quite remember how we got around to this, but I asked her she'd be willing to make a blanket for my child who never got to be here. And she did.

It took her a few months to make, and it took me the better part of the month to be able to open the bag and look at it, but I finally today. And it's just... it's perfect.

[reidsbookclub]

These couple of days have proven my theory that San Diego is definitely not built for rain. Yes I know people laugh at us because we scream when it rains but guys San Diego isn’t built for rain.

edit: picture below of the beginning of downtown getting flooded I was wearing raining boots and I still got water inside my shoes 😭

[opalescent-potato]

man I almost posted some thoughts about this "is kink sexual" thing going around, and then I stopped and was like, "is this something I would be happier writing about in my journal to sort out my thoughts?"

anyway, sometimes I wonder how many people engaging in The Discourse would feel better if they just grabbed a pen and a blank paper notebook.

[just-another-wasteland-merc]

A health update. I am sad but hopeful. I'll toss it under the cut. Mental and physical health below!

Positives and negatives are abound. A positive is that I've been on antidepressants for about four months now, and I can say that I feel myself again mentally. There's obviously bad days still, but I feel they aren't as extreme. I still get anxious but it's not lasting as long as it used to, and I'm really happy about it. I'm not saying I'm putting it to the test when it comes to storms, since I've recently developed an aversion or fear of bad weather, but I'm hoping it's not as bad once it gets less snowy and more rainy.

I've also finally been brave enough to schedule my first massage and it was life changing. I can't wait to go back soon!

Physically, though, I'm in a lot of pain a lot of the time. It does get to me sometimes, but I am trying to find ways to keep it down and do more self care than I have been, and listening to my body. I see a doctor soon who specializes in helping people lose weight with health issues and medications that prevent them from doing so, and since I have both of those things, I'm hoping this doctor can help me.

But because I'm not as active as I used to be, my body has suffered pain wise. Reading articles, blogs, and other tidbits of info helps me in the mindset that I'm not alone, but it's very frustrating to work so hard and only lose a little bit of weight.

I haven't given up yet though. I'm waiting for this appointment and then things will finally move forward.

I'm not looking for tips or tricks, I'm here to just kinda yell into the void. If people want to yell with me, I'm okay with that.

[fatimagic]

spoiler-free preview. i still have to fix the colors and sharpness. and finish the rest of this monstrosity.

[thefreakydeaky]

Boy, do I have issues.

My boyfriend is late. Like we said we would meet 41 mins ago late. Like he didn't time manage correctly and now I've been waiting for 41 mins late. And maybe it shouldn't be such a huge deal, but it is one to me. Everytime something like this happens- it doesn't happen all the time but it sometimes happens- I end up feeling really anxious and also bad about myself. Because I have a history of being let down and stood up. First by my dad then by the people I dated and was in relationships with. I have wasted so much time, staring out a window wishing I could will them to show up for me, to remember me, to give enough of a shit about me to not leave me wondering and worrying and waiting.

Now, this man in particular does not do it often, but when he does it hurts as badly as it has in the past. It takes me back to the insecurity and the disappointment. It drives me up the fucking wall as well. But I think that anger is at the feeling of rejection I get whenever this happens, the feeling of being made to feel that I am not good enough or worth enough. I wish I was someone who found this minorly annoying instead of straight up insulting. Why can't I be?

[zakomoya]

some discourse-y talk under the cut

um anyways what do yall think of that “most trans enstars chara” poll on twitter... i didnt mind it that much but the more i think abt the more i realize how... WEIRD it sounded

like.. how do you gauge trans-ness yk??? like i get it theres some mfs that get more subtext than others but like... its still weird

[felixir]

I don't much care for it, but I did my best

[boomerang109]

it is Friday and i have to move out on Wednesday and i have nothing packed yet. I have finals Monday and tuesday. Other than the fact that im obviously starting super late and am fucked. How do you pack. Like. Explain to me like a child. How do you pack. Is there a wiki how. I am so scared

[a-sleepy-raven]

Chris Redfield

random fluffy HCs (gn!reader)

Leon S. Kennedy

Baby it’ll be alright (gn!reader)

I swear you will find peace again (gn!reader)

general relationship HCs (gn!reader)

coworkers to lovers HCs (gn!reader)

Luis Serra

general relationship HCs (gn!reader)

childhood best friends to lovers HCs (gn!reader)

Jack Krauser

general relationship HCs (gn!reader)

Minifics

Chris Redfield + "baking"

Jack Krauser + "flowers"

Do not reblog, please.

[buttercuparry]

What discourses do, especially with someone you have seen around a bit ( at least for me) is to want to start something anew. A fresh fandom. A new content. A new text etc. Idk I feel a bit listless I guess. I think a part of it is because I know it will only grow from here and out.

[zippityzap]

Wip

[tabby-shieldmaiden]

Every now and then I am disturbed at the ease at which children on the internet get groomed into right-wing ideology. Especially looking back and seeing how I very nearly could have gone down a much darker path myself.

I’m probably gonna try to do something to distract myself and not fall into a spiral. But yeah...

[desperatepleasures]

one time I used the ben affleck smoking reaction image in the family group chat and my mom replied with the funniest possible response which was: "mommy doesn't know who the guy is???" and that phrase has not left my brain since. I'll see blorbos on my dash that I don't recognize and I'll be like well it seems mommy doesn't know who the guy is.