#this is is not at all a nearly 1:1 blurb based on me and my fiance last night and this morning

[katyawriteswhump]

power of love 19/21

steve has powers/eddie lives season 4 fix-it fic. This is nearly the end, which will def be up tomorrow, if it kills me 😝

blurb: Steve has a habit of surviving near death experiences then getting sick for no reason. And Eddie and those fatal bat bites? After an impossible feat of mouth-to-mouth resuscitation from Steve, he’s mysteriously fixed. So, Eddie’s back to being banished, this time with Steve and Robin in tow. Eddie’s healing, but Steve isn’t… and life gets even more confusing, when Eddie develops feelings for Steve, which aren’t entirely unrequited.

(or, lots of angst, fluff, idiots to lovers, eventual smut and happy ending)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18

Preview: “Did you tell them how we opened the gate, Eddie?” “Nooooot exactly.” Steve’s brow furrows. “Seeing as we’re on the starting team now, don’t you reckon we should practice?” “Yeah,” says Eddie, deadpan. “Yeah, I really, really do.” He slams so hard into Steve’s opened arms that the stool tips back. Steve jumps off it, anchoring a fist in Eddie’s hair. Lips brush and spark yet again, and they get ‘practicing’ real hard. Any reason for the kiss other than kissing is forgotten pronto. There’s no future, no past, only here and now—sucking face like a couple of dumb teens at a keg party. To be fair, since realising he’s in love, Eddie’s chiefly felt it through a horror-flick lens of loss. Finally, he’s enjoying the kickass side of things, and it’s a super-fun ride. They don’t have to be releasing flood tides for this to be more than a kiss. When they surface for air, Steve waggles his brows, smirking again. “You’re not gonna pass out on me?” asks Eddie, because he feels he should check. “Nope. Tho’ these jeans ride up my butt, and you’re so not helping.” Yup, Eddie is dry humping a not-insignificant bulge at Steve’s crotch. Beneath Eddie’s sweatpants, he’s nursing his own more-than-semi: “You gonna do something about it?” “Sure thing.” Eddie wrangles down Steve’s zipper.

chapter after cut

Eddie POV continued...

“What’s going on?” Nancy Wheeler’s unexpected voice breaks Eddie’s complete focus on Steve. “Oh my God! Is he..?”

“Chill.” Eddie conjures a goofy grin he doesn’t quite feel. All the same, the real Eddie Munson is back in business, totally metal, and flipping the bird in the face of goddamn death: “He’s gonna be fine, Nancy. He’s gonna be just fine.”

Steve remains out of it.

When, despite Eddie’s desperate cuddling, he falls limp and stops muttering, Eddie’s bravado falters. He joins forces with Robin to hook Steve’s arms over their shoulders, raising him up and hauling him toward Nancy’s station wagon.

Eddie’s knees are about as firm as a jelly-donut, much like every muscle in his body. He grits his teeth, supports his share of Steve’s weight somehow. With an effort, he tunes into the others’ debate about where to take Steve and how close they should remain to Lover’s Lake.

Now Steve is breathing, they decide a hospital is too risky. Getting Steve somewhere warm and dry—not too far away—is their best shot.

“How exactly did you two end up here, anyhow?” asks Dustin, who’s limping impressively fast. “We thought you were in the Soviet tunnels."

“Good job you weren’t,” interjects Nancy. “You have no idea what went down there.”

Eddie forces his goofiest smile again. “Actually, Wheeler, I got an inkling.”

In the car, they piece together the jigsaw. After realizing Steve had been taken, Robin ran straight to Dustin’s, where she learned Eddie had been nabbed. They’d summoned all the gang still around—Nancy, Jonathan, Lucas, and Erica—and split up to try and find a way into the Soviet Base. Because Starcourt was charred rubble, and the military were all over the Hess farm, they’d sought a way in along the waterways:

“Then the freaky shit hit the fan,” said Robin. “Again.”

Robin and Nancy had been bolt-cutting their way into an underground culvert, when every drop of water was sucked from the stream.

“It was totally inexplicable,” says Nancy. “The same thing happened all over Hawkins, including at Lover’s Lake. We thought at first all the water had been sucked into the Upside Down or something, but then—”

“—as I said earlier,” chips in Dustin, “the police radio chatter went apewire about the flood in the military base. Then it got stranger than even that. Every single person associated with O’Sullivan’s occupation of Hawkins has totally vanished, even the ones out on patrol. They’re literally all gone, though we were chiefly freaking out that you two were d-dr—”

“Drowned like rats?” Eddie offers helpfully.

You have no idea how close I got, buddy.

He explains how he had been very much caught in the flood.

Thanks to Steve’s superpowers, they’d washed up here.

Alive.

That results in a few seconds of absolute silence, and then, Robin starts babbling: “So, yeah, we’d been searching for hours,” says Robin. “We were literally dying of worry. Then we stumbled on you pretty much by accident.”

Eddie finishes manoeuvring Steve into the vehicle. Trying to process is making his brain ache. “So, apart from us two, nobody made it out of the tunnels?”

“Not that we know of,” says Nancy, sliding into the driving seat. “I think they were washed into the Upside Down, although we know there’s little or no water there. Maybe that’s why the water rushed back into the lakes and streams super-quick.”

No. That’s not it.

Eddie doesn’t say it out loud. Not yet.

He thinks back yet again to when Steve kissed him during the flood. The show-stopping kiss that was gonna rock Eddie’s memory till the day he died, however distant—or close—that might be. If he lives, he might use that memory to conjure a masterpiece of pure metal.

Dammit, just thinking about having Steve weightless in his arms, gyrating madly against him, brings a misty smile to his lips.

Which dies a swift hard death.

Steve is unconscious. Wedged between him and Robin in the rear-seat of Nancy’s car. But, wow, talk about superpowers! Steve flushed away all of O’Sullivan’s evil-ass henchmen, whether they were polluting the waterways or not.

And the real sucker-punch? When they kissed, Steve told him they were opening a gate to another another dimension.

Eddie plants a soft kiss on Steve’s head, rested on his shoulder, and braces himself to explain it all.

“Steve didn’t just save me,” he says, “He opened a gate. Which wasn’t to the Upside Down. He sent those army guys somewhere else.”

****

Steve POV

“I love him!” fumes Steve, to his freaky-ass fairy-water-god-spirit. They are a swirl in the mists, into which he kicks a spectral foot. “He said he loved me too, and I genuinely don’t think he was shitting me. Do you realise how long I waited for this? Christ, and have you MET Vecna? O’Sullivan and his stormtroopers were My Little Ponies compared to that cuckoo son-of-a-bitch. Eleven is gonna need us BOTH!”

He keeps on arguing, with no clue if they’re listening. Obviously, he can’t stay dead, or whatever the heck is going on with his now creepily possessive fairy-KIDNAPPER. On the other hand, when he lands fully back into his body, it’s deeply un-fun.

His lungs are clenched fists, which his shallow breaths stab like icy shards. He can sense Eddie, somehow knows he’s near, so that’s kinda reassuring.

He keeps arguing with his supernatural stalker, till everything fades. When he again grows faintly aware of his physical surroundings, they’re soft and warm.

He still can’t open his eyes, though.

“Oh, c’mon!” he bitches, in case his fairy-kidnapper is still listening. “Seriously, you can’t separate us now—we got the rest of our lives to spend together. I want a family! Kids! Six of ’em!” Suddenly, he’s gotten it all figured out. “We can adopt.”

“We’re adopting now? Oh, Steve! Look, I don’t know if you can hear me. Focus on getting better. We’ll talk about the rest when—”

“Nance?” Steve startles awake, possibly because she’s squeezing his fingers bone-crushingly tight.

“Steve!” She drops his hand, looking spooked and relieved in equal measures. “Oh my God, you’re awake! You’re okay?”

His head spins with confusion. Still, he’s felt a shitload worse. “Where are we?”

“At the Byers’.” She passes him an opened bottle of water, watches him like a hawk as he sips. “This used to be Jonathan’s room. Nobody moved in, and we figured it would be a decent place to hide.”

“Peachy.” He hands back the bottle. “I’ve been here, like, three times. Each one almost died.”

She swipes a mascara-smudged cheekbone and slams him with a look he knows well. That mingling of longing and guilt that used to break his heart.

Not anymore.

Christ, does he genuinely have to explain that he no longer wants those ‘six little nuggets’ with her, and… Shit! His heart kicks off pounding. If he’s with Nancy, where’s Eddie? Or Robin, for that matter?

Nancy is saying stuff. He interrupts. “Eddie, Nance! Where is he? Where’s Robin? How the hell did I get here?”

“Steve!” Eddie bursts into the room, eclipsing Nancy from Steve’s view. He bounces onto the bed, pulls Steve into a hug: “Christ, I leave you for five seconds, and… Mmmmph!”

Steve’s mouth covers Eddie’s hungrily. It’s difficult to top their last kiss, though they do their darndest. Steve flings his arms around Eddie, veins firing as his strength rushes back. When they finally break apart, Steve takes Eddie’s face in his hands, thumbs caressing those dimples:

He’s real. This is real.

“Got your note,” says Eddie, eyes large and liquid. “Both of them, actually.”

“Oh!” It takes a beat from that little bombshell to detonate. Steve flops back onto the pillows. “I’m sorry, Eddie. Look, I wrote the one you didn’t get first, and—”

“Apology accepted.” Eddie’s turn to caress Steve dopily, brushing his knuckles down the scruff on Steve’s cheek. “I mean, I get it. You wanted to protect me. In the end, both notes mean the same thing.”

“I guess they do.” Steve flinches from Eddie’s intensity. “In a screwed-up kinda way. I’m still an idiot for writing it.”

“Doesn’t matter, Stevie. In case you missed it, while you were busy coming back from the dead… Love you too.”

That has Steve looking up sharply, sitting up, too. Eddie is saying the words Steve yearned for all his life.

Definitely not a hallucination this time.

IT’S FOR REAL. 

His arms glide back around Eddie, who mirrors him, sliding a warm hand to the small of Steve’s back: “Honestly, Eddie, I meant it with all my heart. I don’t deserve… I… um...”

Nancy coughs politely: “I can see I’ve not been keeping up with the plot?” Steve’s flash of remorse is fleeting.  “I’ll give you two some space,” she says, which sounds nice, apart from she’s not left the room for two seconds before Robin charges in.

“Oh my God, Steve! You’re awake!”

The two-way hug becomes a throttling three-way hug. Robin elbows Eddie in the nose, so she can clamp tighter around Steve’s neck. The agonised creak of Jonathan’s former bed can’t stop this being another absolutely perfect moment.

For all of twenty seconds.

Steve’s gotten no idea if Max is still at death’s door or not. Plus, are any of their enemies actually dead?

Vecna isn’t, for sure.

“Okay, getting weird now,” says Robin, extracting herself from Steve and Eddie as swiftly as she arrived. “Right, I got news. Shit, neither of you need to look that spooked! It’s not all apocalyptically terrible.”

First, she and Eddie fill Steve in on what actually happened with the flood. Then Robin gets to the new stuff—El and Hopper are back in Hawkins, and Will and Mike are on their way. Since literally everyone associated with O’Sullivan has vanished, the small contingent of government officials allied with Owens—who is, apparently, also still alive—have wrangled a coup:

“They’re taking over command of the search and clear-up operations. Eddie is officially in the clear! They’re gonna work with El to get rid of Vecna, once and for all.”

“We can help her,” says Steve. Yeah, he wants to stay snug and safe with his two best friends forever. He’s still gotta a job to do. He suspects it’s the main reason he was allowed to come back.

“You already have,” Robin says. “Eddie told us. You totally annihilated O’Sullivan. You opened a gate to another dimension. Not to the Upside Down. Another one! So proud of my Dingus.”

“He’s talking bull.” Steve feels weary for the first time since he woke.  Also, kinda guilty. He never set out to annihilate anyone other than Vecna. He was only following his instincts to protect people he loved. One thing is certain, though: “We did it. Eddie and me. And now… I got a hunch we’re gonna have to do it again.”

...

Eddie POV

WE.

We’re gonna have to do it again.

With Steve safe in his arms, chin notching on his shoulder, Eddie is totally up for it. He knows Steve’s shared his magic juju. He’s ecstatic Steve’s back, and they’re gonna duet on the next verse. And yet…

…who wouldn’t be shitting themselves?

A brief brainstorming about how exactly he and Steve might do ‘it,’ has them agreeing they’ll probably have to return to the Upside Down to flush out Vecna. And that’s before any other gate-opening ensues.

The prospect of returning to demo-bat central, doesn’t exactly fill his heart with song.

They’re summoned to a sitrep at Hopper’s cabin. An official statement of Eddie’s innocence has not yet been issued, and Steve complains he’s still shaky and got a headache. So, they get to stay behind at the Byers’, which is nearer the Lake. Dustin has found them clothes, chiefly from the charity collections, and they’re not exactly a great fit.

Steve’s jeans are particularly clingy around the ass. Eddie isn’t complaining about that at all.

“Is your headache bad?” asks Eddie, after the others have gone.

He’s in the kitchen, rummaging through the cupboard for anything other than cereal. They’re all so sick of it, Robin didn’t even touch the Count Chocular.

“Not really,” says Steve. Eddie pitches him a rock-hard blueberry muffin—a crappy toss, though Steve’s hand shoots out and catches it deftly. He’s decidedly peppy for somebody so recently dead: “Wanted to be alone with you. You know, for my stay of execution and all that?”

Eddie freezes. No. No way. Yeah, they should both be dead but they’re not. Steve’s perching on a stool, head tilting, smirking at his gallows humor:

“Did you tell them how we opened the gate, Eddie?”

“Nooooot exactly.”

 Steve’s brow furrows. “Seeing as we’re on the starting team now, don’t you reckon we should practice?”

“Yeah,” says Eddie, deadpan. “Yeah, I really, really do.”

He slams so hard into Steve’s opened arms that the stool tips back. Steve jumps off it, anchoring a fist in Eddie’s hair. Lips brush and spark yet again, and they get ‘practicing’ real hard.

Any reason for the kiss other than kissing is forgotten pronto. There’s no future, no past, only here and now—sucking face like a couple of dumb teens at a keg party. To be fair, since realising he’s in love, Eddie’s chiefly felt it through a horror-flick lens of loss. Finally, he’s enjoying the kickass side of things, and it’s a super-fun ride. They don’t have to be releasing flood tides for this to be more than a kiss.

When they surface for air, Steve waggles his brows, smirking again.

“You’re not gonna pass out on me?” asks Eddie, because he feels he should check.

“Nope. Tho’ these jeans ride up my butt, and you’re so not helping.” Yup, Eddie is dry humping a not-insignificant bulge at Steve’s crotch. Beneath Eddie’s sweatpants, he’s nursing his own more-than-semi: “You gonna do something about it?”

“Sure thing.” Eddie wrangles down Steve’s zipper.

A faint whisper in the back of his mind tells him they’re crossing a line they’ve never crossed before. Doubtless, the Byer’s ex-kitchen is not the place to do it…

…and who gives a crap?

They grasp each other and stroke, sweaty palms acting as lubricant.

As if they goddamn needed it.

“You’re so fucking hot, Eddie,” moans Steve. “Oh God… yeah… please?”

Eddie grins as Steve’s eyes grow spacy, pupils dilating, then rolling up.  Already, the juddering slide of skin against skin sends waves of pleasure rolling through Eddie. Each nerve-ending in his lower body goes livewire. Steve’s panted breaths gust against Eddie’s throat, almost enough to send him over the edge. It happens, though, when they resume the kiss. Their lips collide, they thrust into each other’s palms. Tongues tangle messily, and everything gets real hot and sticky.

They clean up together, under the trickle of a barely-working shower. Eddie’s kinda shy, because they’d never had a chance to be so intimate before. Steve, who is clearly more accustomed to ‘guy showers,’ points out cheerily, that neither of them has a single remaining bat-bite scar.

“Cool,” murmurs Eddie, and he knows he should be mega-happy about that. “Steve, nothing supernatural happened just now. I mean, when we—”

“—jerked off together,” butted in Steve. Okay, they’re already finishing each other’s sentences. Eddie can’t help snickering slightly. “I thought about that.” Which was more, to be fair, than Eddie did at the time. “I felt the start of that electric tingle then got carried away. I’ve used my powers a few times now. You have to concentrate, and I kind of know what triggers them. Truth was, there was… I dunno, not enough pressure? I was distracted by your hotness, man.”

Eddie beams for real, gaze raking Steve’s shiny wet bod. “Yeah. Ditto.”

“Robin suggested I go to Lover’s Lake for magic practice, so that should be our next move. I reckon El can help us too.”

Us.

Again.

Eddie finds himself back in the circle of Steve’s arms, wet and warm, and totally revved to kick supernatural butt. Steve remains hyper, talking at breakneck speed: “I reckon I’d like to explore other ways to make the earth move first, Eddie. I never actually slept with a guy before, you know that?”

“Wow,” says Eddie, though he’d kinda guessed.

“Tommy and I fooled around once or twice. Douchebag never let me forget it. I’m… Listen, I’m glad you’re gonna be my first. My proper first, and I’d kind of like to sleep with you before… you know, next round with Vecna.”

Oooookay. Eddie realizes one of them is gonna have to slam on the breaks. Crazily, it’s gonna be him: “Stevie, I’m flattered, I really am, but… is this really the time, let alone the place? The others could be back any minute.”

Steve’s flicker of annoyance dies fast. He sinks his dripping forehead to Eddie’s, so close their lashes brush. “Christ, Eddie. You’re right. I’m just trying to distract myself, I guess. We need practice. I mean, proper, not-fooling-around practice. It’s just… I’m so fucking scared we’re not gonna make that home run.”

“Hey.” Eddie squeezes Steve. Specifically, his ass, as Eddie’s hands keep gravitating there. “We’ll make it. I got a good feeling about this.”

“Man, you can be so damn corny.” Steve kisses him again anyway.

They’re still drying themselves, towels hitched around waists, when Dustin’s tinny voice breaks the loaded silence.

“CODE RED. I REPEAT THIS IS A CODE RED. VECNA IS BACK. YOU GOTTA GET UP TO HOP’S CABIN NOW. DO YOU COPY?”

Steve picks up the walkie-talkie and his voice wobbles as he answers. “Yeah, yeah, got it, Henderson. Keep your pants on.” Eddie watches Steve’s Adam’s apple bob, as he swallows hard. “I guess this is it.”

****

next chapter: epilogue part 1 on AO3 epilogue part 1 on tumblr

no pressure tags (not least because it's been months): @kal-ology @estrellami-1

[thefreakandthehair]

The thing about drinking at 31 years old is that it's different from drinking at 18 years old– or 21 years old, or even 25 years old. Each shot, each drink, is one sip away from a terrible night’s sleep and an equally terrible morning.

Eddie Munson’s figured this out. Steve Harrington though? Steve Harrington has not. 

That’s how Eddie finds himself corralling his husband onto the couch after stumbling into the house, the front door slamming loud enough to jolt their cat out of her otherwise peaceful slumber. She glares for a moment before stretching her paws and curling back into a neat little ball. 

“Okay, okay, okay,” Steve repeats, an immediate tell that he’s definitely not making it any further than the couch anyways. “I’m good, I’m fine, this– this is a nice couch.” He punctuates his thought by slapping the cushion and laughing. 

Eddie shakes his head and grins. “Yep, it sure is. You picked it out, remember?” 

Steve gasps and laughs some more, falling back into the corner of the sectional. “I don’t but it’s comfy so if I did, I did a good fucking job.”

He watches with fond comfortability as Steve squirms around on the couch and lays back, arms over his head and dopey laugh still on his lips. It takes a lot of willpower and frankly, respect, not to climb on top of this giggly, flushed, disheveled man he loves so goddamn much and kiss him until he’s flushed for other reasons, but he digs deep and focuses on doing the next best thing: taking care of him. Eddie’s a little worse for the wear in his own right but a sliver of his iron constitution remains from his wild youth and he hangs on by a thread. 

Eddie gets Steve situated into a comfortable position, his back against one side of the cushions and his head propped up on a few pillows to make sure he doesn’t end up with his face smushed into the corner somehow. 

“I’m good, I’m fine– hey, hey, what are you doing?” Steve slurs and Eddie looks up from his position at the end of the couch, his fingers moving quickly as he unties Steve’s sneakers. 

“Taking your shoes off? You can’t sleep in your jeans, Stevie. You’ll thank me tomorrow.” 

Steve hums from somewhere high in his throat but doesn’t say anything else Eddie moves to unhook his belt. 

“Stop–stop it, hey, I’m married!” Steve smacks Eddie’s hand and Eddie barely suppresses a cackle. “You’re hot and all but I’m married and my husband’s hotter than you anyways.” 

With that, Eddie can’t stop himself. Warmth spreads through his chest as he laughs, from his heart all the way down to the tingling in his toes. Even drunk, even with his eyes closed, Steve would still choose him without a thought and sure, after all these years, it shouldn’t come as a surprise but it does. Because Steve is Steve, and Eddie is Eddie, and Eddie still hasn’t figured out what huge karmic debt he must’ve paid for them to have become SteveAndEddie.

He stares at Steve who’s nearly asleep but feebly muttering words like “hot,” and “perfect,” and “lucky.” 

“Hey, hey, Stevie, open your eyes for a second?” Eddie brushes the hair back from his forehead, gently shifting it away from his bloodshot, glossy eyes. He’s beautiful, even like this, what the fuck?

“Oh,” Steve’s eyebrow unfurrow and the right side of his mouth turns up into a small grin. “It’s you. Hi, Ed.” 

“Hi, Steve.” Eddie chuckles and kisses his forehead. “Gonna get your jeans off so you can sleep, okay?” 

“Mhm, yeah, that’s– thanks.” 

Eddie coaxes them off, tossing them onto a chair where they’ll remain until the next morning, and sets a glass of water down on the coffee table for when Steve inevitably wakes up with cottonmouth. One more soft kiss and an even softer blanket later, Steve is out and Eddie tip toes up the stairs to bed. 

The next morning, Eddie wakes to see Steve next to him. At some point, he must’ve woken up and gotten himself to bed which gives Eddie the opportunity to stare uninterrupted in the silence of their bedroom. It stands in stark contrast to the boisterous night before– the loud music and jumping bodies and Chrissy popping a bottle of champagne in celebration of Robin saying yes, as if there’d ever been a doubt. 

Steve’s on his back, the sun just starting to intrude on their tranquility. He takes in Steve’s features, the same ones he’s memorized time and time again but that never fail to stun him just the same. The moles, the freckles, the scars that make him ache and feel thankful simultaneously. The strong line of his jaw, the eyelashes that flutter as he sleeps, that one tendril of hair that insists on curling until Steve forces it into place. Eddie’s seen a lot of the world now, having traveled a bit with his band, and there’s nothing that compares to the man sleeping next to him. 

Even if he’s snoring. 

When Steve does eventually wake up, trudging downstairs with one eye open and asking why Long Island Iced Tea’s even exist, Eddie’s ready with the necessities– a black iced coffee, two sausage, egg, and cheese sandwiches delivered to their doorstep, and a Gatorade for himself.��

“You’re the fucking best, you know that?” Steve smiles through the pounding headache as he sips his coffee and tears into the sandwich. 

“Eh, I try,” Eddie grins with a mouthful of egg and leans over to bump their shoulders together. 

Comfortable quiet drapes over them like the blanket from last night still over the back of the couch, and like the jeans hanging off the recliner– little reminders of the night before and of the domesticity of the life they’ve built together. 

Once Steve finishes his sandwich, their cat, Florence, hops up on the table and starts batting at the rolled up wrappers. 

“Think she wants to play,” Steve grumbles, sliding off the couch and laying on the carpet. “Listen, Florence, you know I love you but kid, I cannot play right now. I’m barely alive.” 

Eddie doubles over and nearly spits Gatorade all over the coffee table. Even their terrible, hungover, washed up mornings aren't all that bad.

[autumnalfallingleaves]

Okay, so I've been thinking. Season 3 gave us so much in terms of magic and the origins of magic, specifically, which got me thinking-- it's stated that all magic originally came from Fairy Country, and, following that, all magical creatures came from there, which should include things like trolls and nisse, right? But young Johanna states that the sun never truly sets in Fairy Country, which wouldn't work for trolls, unless they were constantly in hiding. However, that wouldn't really seem good evolution-wise. Seems kind of weird, right? And nisse are another matter-- they are spirits, which suggests Wild Magic, but are primarily found in domestic spaces, thus suggesting a use of at least some Domestic Magic. Last I checked, Fairy Country doesn't seem to really have any houses (save for Phinium and Lydia's) or uses for house spirits. So what's the common denominator for two species that don't seem to have any common threads? And why do trolls and nisse seem to stand out in particular for being specifically not geared to Fairy Country, evolution notwithstanding?

One word: giants.

What about them? you ask. For that, we need to turn to the original Hilda: Hildafolk's Hilda and the Midnight Giant.

In the back of the graphic novel, we are presented with a visual guide to the mountain giants, which you can find me yelling about here. In that guide, we get this guy:

Who is named Björg, and, according to the book, was "the outcast of the group. He was fearful of the other giants and not well liked. When the others left he went into hiding. Trolls and nisse are descended from him." So this guy is the common link, giving trolls and nisse a common ancestor and a reason for why they may be the outliers in terms of magical beings. The mountain giants are now show canon, per the Faratok Tree episode, and seem to be lifted nearly 1:1 from the book.

From left to right are Halldór, Sigmund, Einarr, Valfreyja (who actually has a slightly different design from the graphic novels), Gertl, Aldinn, Bliða, Heimskr, and Jaðarrok. This basically confirms that all the giants listed in the graphic novel exist in the show, which means that we can extrapolate that Björg also exists, and seems to be in hiding, as the blurb suggests. I'm also thinking, based on the fact that the giants were on Earth really before humans were, that they left Fairy Country thousands, perhaps hundreds of thousands, of years ago, shaping Earth to their liking through the years. This may mean that, while the other giants stayed together, Björg went off and did his own thing, which, I'm thinking, perhaps may have been creating the species that would go on to split and become trolls and nisse respectively.

With the two species being so well-suited to Earth, my guess, taking all of this, is that they were created and Earth and were never native to Fairy Country-- they've got ancestral roots there, but it was never their true home. That's how we get a species that can only live in the dark, and evolved to do so, and a species that has a symbiotic relationships with humans and their houses, which create Nowhere Space.

Now, to go further, my guess is that nisse evolved into their own species later than trolls, as trolls were likely present before humans. The nisse branched off as their own species likely when a particularly small, particularly hairy, and particularly magical troll managed to get into the newly-created Nowhere Space and made a home out of it, which then became the nisse as we know them now.

Anyway. This magic system. I've got Thoughts™️

[henrysglock]

High Existence and ZeroSpace: The First Shadow and NINA May Be Massive, Immersive Drug Trips

The blurb in last Friday's video from TFS sounded familiar, but I couldn't place it. I found a lot of sites quoting The Alchemist about the universe conspiring to give you what you truly want (which is similar and it's probably what I was thinking of when this blurb registered as familiar), but I couldn't find this exact quote:

Well...not at first, anyway. I decided to stick every word I could make out here ^ into my search bar...and I found where the blurb comes from:

This blog post is quite literally the only source I could find for it, and the whole damn thing is directly lifted.

Right off the bat, the site fucking jump-scared me:

And it doesn't end there. Let's dive in, because this rabbit hole is a trip unto itself...no MDMA​ ​required.

1. The Fucking Website...#1 (HighExistence.com)

High Existence is a sort of drug-induced-spiritual-trip centered self-help site.

It's got blog posts and podcasts and all that jazz. Here are some of the highlights:

Wow! That was...a lot. A lot of words from the word show, too:

Wholeness, heroes, ancient aliens, prisons of politeness, and the fucking Shire, too, I guess. Why not?

(An Aside: I've included the VR in here too because of the sheer similarities between Henry's experience with the Shadow in VR, El's experience in NINA, and The First Shadow in general.)

Like fuck it, why not keep going, these posts date back to at least 2017:

And don't let me start in on that Creel boy and Faust...

[Jason voice] "[Eddie] made a deal with the devil and now he has his powers!" (Also we get it, one of them is neurotic and the other is psychotic. I've been saying this since like...forever)

Of course, all that insanity aside, the Russian base arc has just...an insane amount of ST4 and TFS stuff packed into it in general:

(And this isn't even all of it. I know others [cough] Stav Heroesbyler [cough] have covered it even more...but bro it is THERE)

But most importantly for the NINA arc:

Three things: Dialogue doubling (there's the one I showed, plus a) Robin yelling "Wipeout!" at Steve which has the pipeline -> "Wipeout!" at Rink-O-Mania -> 002-005 bullying El in a very similar manner and b) Steve's "that's amazing" line about the water fountain -> "This is amazing!" not only from Alice irt the Creel house but also from Mike irt Will's painting on their way to save El from NINA. Again, these are just a few of MANY instances), makeup doubling with the bloodshot eyes, and my beloved: set/prop doubling.

I love that beautiful framing on the nearly-identical square clocks. I have so much to say about that clock, but specifically:

The clocks being set 9 minutes apart, which happens to be the exact length of time from the end of Vecna's voiceover in 4.07 to the start of the fight sequence in 4.07 (aka the length of One's frozen-clock monologue).

Not only that, but the clock isn't even right. It says it's 3:55, but it's definitely not 3:55 AM (see: movie theater scene) but it's also not 3:55 PM:

(And why do we have a clock in an elevator anyway? That's the real question. That thang only exists to deliver subtext, baby! It exists to connect the two scenes further!)

Anyway, as you all likely noticed, this site mostly deals in psychedelics, stimulants, and empathogens.

link

Hell, you could even pull One's bit on the ecosystem into it, since he's describing connections between beings that are being disturbed/destroyed by humanity.

Anyway, the site tends to center specifically on DMT and MDMA...so let's talk about those:

MDMA & DMT An aside: Interesting to me that psychosis here can be counteracted with sedatives. Makes me wonder if whatever happened in 1979 could have been halted if they'd just tranq'd One. Hm.

First off: Did I read that right? Piggy-backing? Damn, son. 4.09, The Piggyback, is pictured in that paragraph. So is Brenner's candy bit with the children -> "candy flipping" vs LSD use in Brenner's lab.

Second: Ah, how nice. Intravenous/injectable. Just like how El is constantly being shot up with...something...to enter NINA.

Now, nearly all psychedelics can induce psychosis, but especially so if they're combined with other psychoactive substances and/or if the user has a history of psychosis (either themselves or in their family).

However, MDMA specifically has been posited as a treatment for PTSD and retrograde/traumagenic amnesia:

link Like...wow. Okay, I guess!

tl;dr: One seems to have been tripping fucking balls during the monologue. Literally every fucking version of him. El likely is as well. Funny how that works. Was any of that real? [smash cut to the way blood pours down the walls and the dead children dance around in the VR version of NINA] And either way, Henry in TFS isn't far behind with his hallucinogenic moments.

The connection? Whatever the hell is going on in Hawkins Labs...and symptoms of drug use.

I was not expecting to get this much out of a single rabbit hole. But...that's life with this show, isn't it? And this is only Part 1.

2. The Fucking Website...#2 (Futurism.com)

The guy who made that original post that TFS lifted the blurb from (Jordan Lejuwaan) runs a couple different websites. The most interesting one is Futurism, which is basically an online version of the Weekly Watcher:

It won't let me filter by date, but it seems to have been founded in 2017, stemming from an infographic subreddit. (Now, it says it's a trustworthy news source, and maybe it is, but... Do your own assessment of that. I'm not your mother, yknow?)

Jordan Lejuwaan was also involved in something far more interesting irt Stranger Things...

3. Zero Space

Jordan co-founded an immersive, interactive theater experience called ZeroSpace back in 2018. As we all know, TFS was just in the beginning phase of its creation around this time.

So...This was like a brick to the skull:

"Alice in Wonderland" (don't get me started: rabbit fuckery, DRUGS!!!!!, clocks/being later, Alice Creel, Fringe connections (Through The Looking Glass and What Walter Found There being the episode about the pocket universe where 20 years passed in 5 days...and also wherein we find out about him hiding away an Observer child that he will later time travel with to save the world from the Observer takeover...erasing himself from time/the timeline by doing so...there is SO much) not to mention the "one pill makes you larger/smaller" vs teen El and baby El...it's too much to try and fit in this post), "ALIENS AND LASERS", "stretch the perceived reality of the sense", "art, actors and your own mind converge to prompt MORE QUESTIONS THAN ANSWERS" (which was a common complaint about TFS: it leaves people with more questions than answers).

("See you on the other side" being an in-show line from Henry in the lab to Patty in the void, but this image is ripped directly from the same promo video that the High Existence blurb appears in.)

Here's a little taste of what ZeroSpace is like, but I suggest going to the actual page to see it in action:

It's heavily heavily reminiscent of TFS, even just in the content warnings...

Not to mention the actual show content SFX:

However, the goal of TFS isn't to stretch our senses. We're just watching. We are not the volunteer seeing the other side.

For most of the show, that person is Henry (except the first 5 mins, when it's Cptn. Brenner and his crew literally experiencing the other side). Henry is doing the experiencing. He's the one breaking the fourth wall by picking at/breaking the sets, the one running through the audience and leaving out the theater doors (only to end up right back on stage just like El in the Rainbow Room in 4.05).

With each bit of info I find out adjacent to the play, the more convinced I am that this is some secret third boy's experience in a NINA-like simulation.

Overall—

a) TFS most likely isn't wholly real, and it seems very likely that it's the same kind of simulation as NINA.

b) El was probably drugged up with some kind of empathogenic psychedelic going into NINA, likely with the goal of setting her up to form emotional connections quickly and deeply only to rip that deep connection away in order to bolster her abilities.

c) NINA is not, then, wholly based in truth. Parts of NINA (staring at the bullying from 002-005) may have been generated from El's memories of the outside world.

d) With NINA and TFS seeming so similar, I wouldn't be shocked if parts of it are just one massive empathogen trip (staring at how quickly Henry and Patty bond, similarly to how quickly Henry and El bond in NINA).

e) Whoever is in NINA with teen El is also tripping balls, most likely, and may have gone off the rails in that regard. However, that's in a simulation...hard to assign guilt or blame for things done in a fictional/unreal world.

f) Whoever was with baby El in 1979 may have been in a similar situation "moving chess pieces"-style instead. Read: drugged in order to put him in a situation where he would bolster El's latent abilities...and it went wrong (see also: Walter Bishop's orchestrated/fake massacre meant to bolster Olivia's latent abilities.)

g) Richard Brenner having been the head of narcotics makes me question which Brenner we're seeing at any given time: Martin, or Richard?

[felassan]

Dragon Age: The Official Cookbook: Tastes of Thedas lore post Part 2

This post is part 2 of 2. [Link to Part 1]

(Post contents under a cut, in case anyone would rather not read cookbook spoilers. also due to post length)

If I have forgotten, misread or misunderstood something, please let me know.

This post is complementary to Part 1, so please see Part 1. The first post contains some other information, such as a full list of what culture[s]/area[s] each dish comes from, a full list of all in-world ingredients mentioned and notes on the worldstate that the cookbook was written in. The lore collected in this post is just a general note of lore mentioned in the cookbook, so it contains both old/previously known lore, and new lore from the cookbook. There is a bit of repetition in places where a piece of lore made sense in include in multiple categories.

[☕ found this post or blog interesting or useful? my ko-fi is here if you feel inclined. thank you 🙏]

[Devon/mom mentions from blurbs]

Devon, their mother and the cookbook

The cookbook introduces a new character called Devon, who is the narrator, writer and compiler of the cookbook in-world. Devon is now an adult, and their mother was the cook for the Couslands at Castle Cousland (implied to be Nan from the Human Noble origin). In their youth Devon helped their mother out in the kitchen, undertaking chores like sweeping the floor. They also helped cook from time to time (which their mother approved of and expressed pride to them over). They were child-like and a dreamer, often daydreaming about going off on a grand adventure and engaging in acts of heroism, and getting into trouble from their mother due to this. They did not used to be very adept in the kitchen and at one time almost set Castle Cousland on fire with their first attempt at a stew. Since then they have been practising cooking extensively and are now a good cook. Their mother taught them the important lesson of love through food. Devon is very much their mother's child, and loves food.

The position of Cousland family cook is implied to no longer exist. Devon's mother is implied to have now passed away. (and in game Nan dies during Howe's Treachery)

Devon's mother nearly lost her mind trying to keep the Hero of Ferelden's mabari out of her larder. Similar to this, falling 'prey' to a nug's cute face once resulted in a nug (which are voracious omnivores) in Devon's kitchen eating lots of their food, and Devon discovering first-hand how voracious they can be in their efforts.

Devon has a desire to see all of Thedas and as an adult recently embarked on a journey to travel throughout Thedas in order to see and experience its different types of food, in order to honor and thank their mother. This was a year-long journey involving many weeks on the road, with the occasional encounter with bandits and beasts. They travelled by carriage and on foot.

Devon travelled throughout Thedas, including Nevarra, Orzammar, Tevinter, Ferelden, Orlais, Antiva, Rivain and among the Avvar. They met and spoke to various key characters including Varric, Sera, Krem and Bull's Chargers, and sampled every local cuisine they could get their hands on, even the downright strange. They filled their book with different recipes and thought of their mother with each new entry, in order to share them and the lesson their mother taught them with the rest of the world. Some of their recipes are based on these conversations. Others are Devon's mothers recipes or Devon's own recipes/experimentations with other foods.

Devon is something of a fan of the Hero of Ferelden, Hawke and the Inquisitor (especially the HoF) and displays a child-like excitement for the world. On their journey they tracked down foods eaten by the heroes and their companions. Devon's hero worship of the PCs and their companions was part of their motivation for their journey.

Devon's mother often had her hands full with the Cousland's meals.

Devon's mother had a recipe for Chocolate Cake. She baked it for Devon's tenth name-day and then at their every name-day after that as Devon always begged for this. To this day when Devon thinks about their mother's love for them, this cake sits front and center in their mind. The Fereldan Potato and Leek Soup included in the book is also hers, though for the book Devon put their own little twist on it, using crispy toasted chickpeas from Rivain for the crunch rather than a side of toasted bread. Devon loves stews and their mother's stews will always rule their heart (the recipe for King Alistair's Lamb and Pea Stew comes close to stealing that crown). Devon's mother always knew that there is no greater comfort than a warm slice of cobbler, and the simple pleasure of her baking would wash away all of Devon's troubles from the day when they ate some in her kitchen (it's hard to feel the sting of a skinned knee or a lost game when your belly is full of warm gooey goodness). Devon's mother usually made her cobblers with strawberries and rhubarb, but only the stems not the leaves as those are poisonous.

Devon's mother was kind and indulged her child, whom she loved.

Devon likes hot chocolate topped with whipped cream and dusted with cinnamon.

Devon loves sweets and desserts.

Tea is a nice accompaniment for sweet treats. Tea exists in many blends. Devon likes deciding which biscuit to pair with different blends.

Once when young Devon tripped and fell face-first into a patch of nettles. They cried and got a lecture from their mother, telling them to play elsewhere from then on. Also when Devon was young, they were very reluctant to eat their greens/vegetables. But their mother always used to say that you can't only live off meat, and any meal without vegetables is a meal half-finished. They didn't understand her reasoning then, but they do now. Ever since hearing Leliana kept a nug as a pet, Devon has desperately longed for a Schmooples of their own. Another lesson their mother taught them is that sides form an equal part of the equation in a meal to the main part of it, and that they deserve just as much care and attention as the dish they are served alongside.

Ferelden

Fereldans - including their mabari - love cheese and bacon.

Barley is a common grain grown in Ferelden. In Ferelden grain is usually barley or wheat. Rice is very rare in Ferelden.

Hearty Fereldan Scones are hearty, packed with cheese and bacon, and keep a person sated for a good while. They are less sweet and less delicate than their counterparts (referring to Orlesian scones?). Mabari like them due to the cheese and bacon content.

Pickled Eggs taste salty-sour and are a very common Fereldan folk remedy, 'prescribed' by them for almost anything, including fevers, colds, aching body parts and when you feel a bit of illness coming on (sounds like chicken soup in parts of our world hh ^^). If asked for advice on health or when they meet someone who looks a bit under the weather, many Fereldans recommend and provide pickled eggs. When Cullen was experiencing lyrium withdrawals, Fereldan members of the Inquisition left a heap of pickled eggs in his office. whether this actually works or not we don't know. Still, loving pickled eggs is a Fereldan trait and they are considered one of the country's finest snacks.

In Orlais, City and Dalish elves eat Peasant Bread, which is a rustic, hearty type of bread with a straightforward recipe that calls for wheat, salt and grease in nearly equal parts. This produces a biscuit that is good for mopping up last bits of stew and pairing with butter and jam. Devon remarks that this biscuit is reminiscent of Fereldan cuisine.

Fereldans love stews; people, including Fereldans themselves, joke about this often. The three key aspects of any good Fereldan stew are that it's hearty, humble and straightforward to make.

Devon assures the reader that Fereldans don't actually cook their ingredients until they're all "a uniform grey color", contrary to what Alistair once said. They do however throw them into the largest pot they can find, with the rationale being that if you're going to make a stew, you might as well make a lot of it.

Lamb and Pea Stew is hearty, humble, and straightforward to make. This dish is so ubiquitous in Ferelden that it's almost become synonymous with Fereldan cuisine.

Sweet and Sour Cabbage Soup is a Fereldan staple and Fereldans enjoy it regularly. It's more solid than liquid, filled to the brim with cabbage, tomatoes and other vegetables, and is paired with a thick slice of bread. This makes it a filling, satisfying and warming meal, especially on cold days.

A troupe of actors in Orlais focus on a popular comedy set in the fictional Fereldan village of Wilkshire Downs. Their performances sell out almost instantly. In order to play their roles well, and out of dedication for their craft, the actors changed their diets to match those of their characters. For example, there's a mayor character who specifically only eats cabbage soup (bear in mind this is Orlesians trying to get in 'Fereldan character').

Nug Bacon and Egg Pie is a traditional Fereldan farmer's pie.

Fereldan ale is soothing and relatively easy on the stomach, compared to something like a Hissing Drake.

Fereldans love turnips and enthuse about them. Turnips make a good addition to any stews and are also good in pies. They're versatile and can be prepared in many ways (boiled, stir-fried, roasted, steamed, mashed, eaten raw, etc). Turnip and Mutton Pie is a classic Fereldan dish served at taverns across the country. It's an unmatched, rich comfort food that is good on cold or miserable days. Even the smell is comforting. It consists of tender chunks of lamb and turnip enveloped by buttery crust. Cole once evoked this sense of comfort by throwing a bushel of turnips into a fire.

Kirkwall

Crab Cakes is a classic Kirkwall dish.

The Hanged Man's Mystery Meat Stew is a famous dish from this Kirkwall tavern, and its feature dish. It's made from a different meat every morning, such as pork or something more suspicious/less appetizing. The waitress at the tavern claims that they hang people who ask what meat it is from the rafters.

Roasted Turkey With Sides is found in Starkhaven, Kirkwall and the Free Marches in general. This dish is common at birthday celebrations and dinner parties. The turkey is cooked til golden-brown and surrounded by a host of different sides, creating an impressive scene. This meal is complicated, difficult and time-consuming to prepare. The turkey alone can take hours to do. If a few sides are involved it can take most of the day, especially without kitchen staff. This meal is meant to be shared.

Orlais

A common feature of Orlesian cuisine is lots of cream.

Creamy soups seem to be emblematic of Orlesian cuisine.

Some strong/hot combinations of spices are a bit much for Orlesian palates, which are more delicate than others.

Lately in the Grey Wardens, a new variation of the Grey Warden Pastry Pockets (pastries stuffed with meat, potatoes and onion) recipe was introduced by new recruits from Orlais, which uses the more delicate Orlesian puff pastry. These newer pastries are delicious hot or cold but can't really be stored anywhere where they may be jostled as they will get mushed, unlike the original version of the recipe, which was tougher so as not to fall apart in packs when on the road.

A troupe of actors in Orlais focus on a popular comedy set in the fictional Fereldan village of Wilkshire Downs. Their performances sell out almost instantly. In order to play their roles well, and out of dedication for their craft, the actors changed their diets to match those of their characters. For example, there's a mayor character who specifically only eats cabbage soup (bear in mind this is Orlesians trying to get in 'Fereldan character').

Honey Carrots is an Orlesian staple, often found on the table at meal times in Orlais. The traditional Orlesian rendition of this dish is sweet due to liberal application of honey, implying that outside of Orlais other takes on this dish are less sweet with less honey due to differing palates/cuisine styles (since Orlesian standards run sweet).

"Blancmange" is an Orlesian word which literally translates as "white eating". The dish Blancmange is white pudding made with either milk or heavy cream that has been thickened. On its own it has a sweetness that is mild by Orlesian standards; it's generally served with various toppings which amplify the sweet flavors. Possible toppings include red grape compôte, toasted almonds, ribbons of fresh mango and cherry sauce (the latter is Devon's preference). Alone blancmange is plain-looking so the toppings are also a way to decorate it with various designs.

Vivienne's preferred arrangement of Blancmange is a stunning, elegant, pristine white-on-white tableau of white chocolate curls and whole jasmine flowers, served on a dark plate for contrast.

Orlesian dinner parties are long indulgent slews of extravagance. Not finishing all of the courses may be perceived as being rude to the host or taken by them as offensive.

Orlesian desserts often include sugar and cream.

Sour Cherries in Cream is an Orlesian dessert composed of a small bowl filled with black cherries dressed in sweet cherry sauce and whipped cream. This dish is an example of one which is lighter fare than usual for Orlesian cuisine, and may be eaten as the last course of an extensive dinner party (as even the Orlesians are sometimes in need of lighter fare).

The Orlesians know how to make a good pastry.

Croissants are the most well-known Orlesian pastry. They are a lot of work to make. To achieve their famous flaky texture, dough is layered with butter and then rolled (with a rolling pin) and folded several times over, before being rolled into a thin sheet.

In Orlais, City Elves and Dalish Elves eat Peasant Bread, a rustic, hearty type of bread with a straightforward recipe that calls for wheat, salt and grease in nearly equal parts. This produces a biscuit that is good for mopping up last bits of stew and pairing with butter and jam. Devon remarks that the biscuit is reminiscent of Fereldan cuisine.

Tevinter

A mysterious, strange, impossible-to-identify meat is often served in taverns across Tevinter, often with a big portion of Nevarran flat bread. It's something of a tall tale. Devon ordered a portion, wondering what exotic species it could be, and it turned out to be delicious chicken legs.

Stuffed Vine Leaves is a classic Tevinter appetizer sold in taverns there. Tender leaves are stuffed with rice, herbs and sometimes minced meat. Devon recommends topping it with lemon juice and some tzatziki sauce.

Dorian loves chocolate-coated orange peels, colloquially known as "Poison Stings". They are sweet, sour, crunchy, chewy and energizing. Dorian ate these a lot on his travels from Tevinter to Ferelden to join the Inquisition.

Cherry Cupcakes are decadent little pink cakes served alongside other sweets by servants on stilts at the Tevinter theater. The servants carry them to each private box. The cakes both taste and look good. They were once used as a vehicle for deadly poisons.

Tevinter Pumpkin Bread is one of Dorian's favorite foods. They are wonderful treats with limited ingredients, and can be made in a pan.

Starkhaven

Starkhaven Fish and Egg Pie is famous, almost oval in shape and stuffed full of fish from the Minanter River. It has a light flaky crust.

Starkhaven is beautiful, almost oval in shape, sits perched on the Minanter River and is crowned with solid rings of tall, gray stone. It has lavish estates and fountains. Minanter River fish are implied to be common in Starkhaven cuisine and trade.

Prince Sebastian Vael has high popularity.

Roasted Turkey With Sides is found in Starkhaven, Kirkwall and the Free Marches in general. This dish is common at birthday celebrations and dinner parties. The turkey is cooked til golden-brown and surrounded by a host of different sides, creating an impressive scene. This meal is complicated, difficult and time-consuming to prepare. The turkey alone can take hours to do. If a few sides are involved it can take most of the day, especially without kitchen staff. This meal is meant to be shared.

Free Marches

Roasted Turkey With Sides is found in Starkhaven, Kirkwall and the Free Marches in general. This dish is common at birthday celebrations and dinner parties. The turkey is cooked til golden-brown and surrounded by a host of different sides, creating an impressive scene. This meal is complicated, difficult and time-consuming to prepare. The turkey alone can take hours to do. If a few sides are involved it can take most of the day, especially without kitchen staff. This meal is meant to be shared.

Nevarra

The gardens of Nevarra are extremely beautiful, dazzling in their vibrancy.

In Nevarran culture, food is as much a feast for the eyes as for the mouth. They create artful and aesthetically pleasing food arrangements. Nevarrans like their dishes to be pleasing to the eye, and take this into account when cooking.

Nevarran flat bread goes from dough to ready to eat in minutes, contrasting other methods of making bread which involve baking loaves for hours. It can be eaten in many ways, including on its own, brushed with oil, or as a vehicle for an assortment of dips such as yogurt dip.

A mysterious, strange, impossible-to-identify meat is often served in taverns across Tevinter, often with a big portion of Nevarran flat bread. It's something of a tall tale. Devon ordered a portion, wondering what exotic species it could be, and it turned out to be delicious chicken legs.

Antiva

Antivan cuisine includes pasta.

Dinnertime is usually a late-night affair in Antiva.

Rice is not seen much outside of Antiva and Rivain. Antiva exports very little of its rice. Due to this, in Antiva it's relatively cheap compared to other grains and is a key component in dishes favored by less well off Antivans. Crow Feed is a simple, cheap and delicious dish of rice, butter and onions, named after the Antivan Crows.

Fish Chowder is a classic Antivan dish. It's a thick creamy soup that evokes Antiva City.

Pickpockets seem to be common in Antiva/Antiva City, as Devon includes them alongside corrupt politicians and Antivan leather when referencing Zevran's homesickness for the place and creating an image in the mind's eye of Antiva.

Antivan meals "sure are something to behold". Antivan nobles have decadent, indulgent spreads for dinner involving lots of courses. Such dinners can have ten dishes, full of ingredients like olives, truffles, pasta and cream.

Gnocchi is a filling Antivan dish, with small pieces made of wheat, flour, egg salt and potato. It may be dressed with leeks and rich cheese sauce.

Being bordered by the Rialto Bay to the east, Antiva is mostly populated on the coast. Because of this seafood plays a starring role in Antivan cuisine. The classic Antivan paella exemplifies this, consisting of rice, saffron and a variety of seafood, from whole shrimp to cuttlefish to mussels. It's made in a single pot and the end result is aromatic. It's traditionally cooked in a shallow, wide pan called a paellera (or confusingly, in some parts of Antiva, a paella) but can be prepared in almost any deep skillet. It's best paired with a glass of wine, preferably an Antivan vintage. Josie recommends doing this. :)

Cacio e Pepe is a classic, simple Antivan dish among its rich and poor alike. It's composed of three main ingredients - pasta, cheese and pepper. Despite its simplicity it's hard to make correctly. The sauce has to be smooth, not clumpy, which is a surprisingly difficult task. However the skill of making it can be learned with practise and perseverance. Antivan grandmothers may sternly judge their young family members' attempts at making it correctly, only approving when it's just right.

Treviso is a port city in northern Antiva that was captured and liberated several times during the Qunari Wars and the New Exalted Marches. During the dark times of occupation, food was scarce, and the city residents had to make do with what limited ingredients they had. From their creativity in these times Treviso Energy Balls were born. These combine peanut butter, nuts and dried fruit into a bite-sized treat that contains lots of energy. They are ideal to take with you when hiking.

Antivan Apple Grenade is an Antivan dessert (sweet pastry bundles filled with piping-hot apple) named for resembling the fire grenades used by the Antivan Crows, both in shape and in heat.

Rivain

Rivaini cuisine includes couscous (a sort of pasta made with semolina flour and water, a lot smaller than typical Antivan pasta). Couscous sounds like it is not common or even known at all in the south. It has a mild slightly nutty flavor on its own and excels in soaking up surrounding flavors, making it a great base for salads.

Rice is not seen much outside of Antiva and Rivain.

Chickpeas come from Rivain.

In Rivain, a Goat Custard recipe is very popular as a dessert. The custard is made from goat's milk and studded with roasted figs to add sweetness to the overall richness. Milk from the Ayesleigh gulabi goat is particularly prized by custard connoisseurs in Thedas due to its natural sweetness, which when used in this recipe enhances the sweet flavors.

The classic Rivaini Tea Blend is probably the most famous tea blend in Thedas. It's a mixture of peppermint, lemon verbena, oregano and licorice root. This combination is soothing and said to have healing properties. Celene of Orlais drinks this tea throughout the day to alleviate headaches.

Anderfels

Smoked Ham from the Anderfels doesn't actually taste of despair, contrary to what rumors and the importers say. The Anderfels are largely ill-suited for farming, but pigs do surprisingly well there despite the inhospitable climate. Due to this Anderfels ham is big and is delicious when glazed. Devon favors a glaze made from a combination of apples and apricots. One glaze in particular is made from wildflowers and can turn a smoked ham as hard as jade, rendering it unsuitable for eating.

Seheron

Seheron smells like tea, incense and the sea.

Seheron Fish Pockets are hot due to a combination of spices, but the heat is tempered somewhat by the soft wrap and crisp vegetables. (They are a group favorite food of Bull's Chargers). The fish involved is packed with flavor and the pockets fall apart if eaten haphazardly. Devon learned this recipe from one of Bull's Chargers.

Avvar

The Avvar are gatherers as well as hunters.

When Avvar can't hunt gurguts and wyverns, they go for smaller prey and forage for alternative food items such as snails, which are common on hillside boulders. Snails are an abundant and traditional source of food for the Avvar. When prepared correctly the texture and flavor are good. It sounds like the Avvar usually eat them without accompanying ingredients such as salad. They can be dressed in butter and oil. They aren't common in Lowlander cuisine and many Lowlanders are unconvinced on eating/trying them.

Many Avvar settlements populate the Frostbacks. In spring Avvar begin preparing for the following winter by smoking meat, picking vegetables and drying fruit. Springtime is the gurgut's mating season. At this time especially travelers are advised to keep their distance from gurguts, as they're dangerous.

Lowlander spices are prized among the Avvar and often reserved for feasts as rare delicacies.

The Avvar are generally utilitarian in their cooking methods, with lots of stews. Holds by lakes and rivers have a unique way of cooking fish. Instead of using a pan, the fish is wrapped in pungent leaves and salt then left baking all day over banked coals. Like stews, this method of cooking does not require constant attention. The salt helps keep moisture inside the fish, which turns the flesh creamy and tender. Cracking the salt open is good fun.

Avvar live on whatever they can glean from the land owing to living in the inhospitable Frostbacks. They hunt all kinds of beasts, including harts, rams, lurkers, gurguts and sometimes even wyverns. Wyvern can be delicious but if not prepared correctly are very poisonous. Correct preparation involves following detailed instructions.

Chasind

Chasind love poussin, a good alternative to roast turkey though significantly smaller in size. The Chasind typically cook it in a large pot over an open fire for an extended period of time. A similar effect can be achieved with any other cookware of suitable size and an oven. The secret to tender meat that falls off the bone is marinating and basting it to keep it moist during the cooking process. Devon recommends grilled poussin for more intimate dinner parties with smaller guest lists.

Chasind drink Chasind Wildwine and Chasind Sack Mead. Both are strong, even brutal. The flavor of the sack mead is almost poetic. First there is an overwhelming rush of honey, tinged with the sour-sweetness of apple blossoms, that fills the mouth with all the bright warmth of a summer's day. The initial sweetness then fades and there comes an unexpected bitterness, reminiscent of the slow decay into fall. The drink is therefore like the turning of the seasons in a single cup/sack.

Dalish Elves

Preserved foods play an important role in many different cultures across Thedas, including the Dalish. They help communities weather times of scarcity (e.g. in winter) and allow people to make long journeys away from home.

Dalish hunters take preserved foods such as Spiced Jerky with them on their hunts as provisions so that they can bring back game the clan is depending on. It means they won't be hungry and don't have to be back in time for dinner. Due to how long it lasts, Devon wonders if Spiced Jerky is used in offerings made by certain Dalish to Fen'Harel. His shrines are usually located well outside of Dalish camps, but Devon posits that leaving behind food that would readily spoil would be bad practise, especially given the fact that the prevailing opinion on these shrines is to avoid them.

Dalish make Hearth Cakes as comfort food. They are traditionally made over the hearth on an iron griddle or skillet, hence the name. The original recipe calls for halla butter but other types of butter work just as well. The resulting dough stays moist inside but crisp and flaky on the outside. Hearth Cakes can be made plain or with added dried fruit, such as cranberries, raisins and currants. The Dalish use whatever is on hand.

In Orlais, City Elves and Dalish Elves eat Peasant Bread, a rustic, hearty type of bread with a straightforward recipe that calls for wheat, salt and grease in nearly equal parts. This produces a biscuit that is good for mopping up last bits of stew and pairing with butter and jam. Devon remarks that the biscuit is reminiscent of Fereldan cuisine.

The Dalish make a warm, gooey, comforting dessert called Dalish Forest Fruit Cobbler using whatever forest fruit is currently in season.

City Elves

In Orlais, City Elves and Dalish eat Peasant Bread, a rustic, hearty type of bread with a straightforward recipe that calls for wheat, salt and grease in nearly equal parts. This produces a biscuit that is good for mopping up last bits of stew and pairing with butter and jam. Devon remarks that the biscuit is reminiscent of Fereldan cuisine.

Lentil Soup is a popular recipe in City Elven alienages.

Orzammar / dwarves

Underground, dwarves raise spiders to eat just as surface folk raise cows and goats (this factoid appearing in the cookbook reinforces or perhaps, more accurately, properly canonizes this aspect of Orzammar/underground dwarven culture, as this was previously only featured in the DA TTRG). Spider legs are fried and served with a sauce containing alcohol. Spider legs are not unlike crab legs in taste. Sourcing spider legs above ground is not easy, and the demand from the surface for this kind of export from underground is minimal.

In dwarven culture sauces are often made with some type of alcohol. The precise kind depends on the establishment in question. The recipes for these sauces are closely-guarded secrets which chefs won’t specify. There are many varieties of these sauces. Orzammar has a fierce competition (to be crowned Orzammar’s Best Sauce) and so dwarves sometimes devise nefarious schemes and plots to acquire the secret sauce recipes. Lichen ale is generally not used in these sauces.

All mushrooms growing underground in caves and the Deep Roads are called "deep mushrooms" but there is no one variety of deep mushroom. There are in fact several. Some are squat, broad and flat-capped, while others are long and spindly, reaching towards the sky like an old man's gnarled fingers. They are used for many things, from making health potions to deadly poisons.

In Orzammar, deep mushrooms are farmed for eating. There they are a delicacy prized for their unique flavor and intoxicating scent. Some dwarves believe that a deep mushroom's proximity to lyrium and darkspawn improves its flavor. Devon, who is almost certainly human, suggests that non-dwarves and Surface dwarves who have lost their lyrium resistance should not eat deep mushrooms that have been in proximity to lyrium.

Dwarves roast cave beetles in their shells. Eaten in this way they are not unlike prawns, being similar in texture and flavor. This aspect of the lore book properly canonizes or reinforces another thing about dwarven underground culture that was previously only featured in the DA TTRPG.

Underground dwarves eat bread made from black lichen. Black lichen is toxic but high temperatures seem to largely neutralize this, making it safe to consume. Surface varieties of lichen can be substituted for the lichen used in making Black Lichen Bread. Any lichen used in making lichen bread needs to be thoroughly dried. Bark can also be used in place of lichen, although this would make the resulting bread more bark bread than lichen bread.

Nugs are edible and a key part of dwarven cuisine. The first dwarf to attempt eating one was called Varen. He did so out of desperation but became a paragon for his culinary discovery. The flavor is like a cross between pork and rabbit. Nugs are very tender, especially when roasted. There are lots of nug-based dishes including Nug Pancakes and nug-gets. For nug pancakes, other meats can be substituted.

Orzammar offers little in the way of choice when it comes to locally-produced foods. However, trade with the surface has ensured that foods from above ground are very popular underground. Jam, especially plum jam, is in especially high demand. It's very expensive there and only the most wealthy and influential Orzammar residents can afford it due to this. Recently Devon encountered a local jam maker in Orzammar who, rather than purchase jams as-is from merchants has opted to import only the individual components, in the hope that by making them themselves, they can sell the product at a much more reasonable price.

Food is easily defined underground; as long as it's edible and capable of being scavenged, it gets eaten. A surface dweller's understanding of "edible" may not align exactly with that of an Orzammar dwarf.

Lichen Ale is the drink of choice among Dust Town dwarves. It is literally toxic. In sufficient quantities it can overpower even the heartiest of dwarven constitutions. Consequently non-dwarves must approach it with caution. Most can tolerate a few sips without issues. Devon devised their own rendition of Lichen Ale using the dwarven recipe as a base, so that non-dwarves can enjoy the look and most of the flavors of the original without fear of poisoning themselves.

Grey Wardens

Grey Wardens undertake exhausting work in poor climates on patrol on the road. As such they need food items more nourishing than handfuls of nuts. On the road they often eat Grey Warden Pastry Pockets, pastries stuffed with meat, potatoes and onion. The original recipe produced a tough pastry to stop it falling apart in their packs. Lately a new variation of the recipe was introduced by new recruits from Orlais, which uses the more delicate Orlesian puff pastry. These newer pastries are delicious hot or cold but can't really be stored anywhere where they may be jostled as they will get mushed, unlike the original version of the recipe, which was tougher so as not to fall apart in packs when on the road.

Characters

When Cullen was experiencing lyrium withdrawals Fereldan members of the Inquisition left a heap of Pickled Eggs in his office, as these are a common Fereldan folk cure for many ailments.

Solas' bald head was at one point compared to an egg by another character.

Seheron Fish Pockets are a group favorite food of Bull's Chargers.

Krem tells an amazing story of a time when he, Bull and five other Chargers defended a village from fifty bandits. When the bandits were defeated and the Chargers went to collect their payment, the villagers paid them with several bags of rice rather than in gold. The Chargers used it to make dishes such as Rice Pudding.

Prince Sebastian Vael has high popularity.

There are rumors of a kind and appearing hero (Diplomatic Hawke).

Cole once evoked the sense of comfort from turnips/Turnip and Mutton Pie felt by Fereldans by throwing a bushel of turnips into a fire, via the smell.

Sera's Yummy Corn recipe is simple, yet strict, with no wraps and no non-yellow corn allowed. The corn should be checked for rot, peeled halfway, washed, cooked, peeled again and eaten. Devon holds that other varieties of corn would work fine too, but when they suggested this to Sera she was so disgusted that they couldn't bring themselves to try it. Devon assures the reader that merchant-bought corn is fine however.

Vivienne's preferred arrangement of Blancmange is a stunning, elegant, pristine white-on-white tableu of white chocolate curls and whole jasmine flowers, served on a dark plate for contrast.

Vivienne starts off her day with a croissant.

Dorian loves chocolate-coated orange peels, colloquially known as "Poison Stings". They are sweet, sour, crunchy, chewy and energizing. Dorian ate these a lot on his travels from Tevinter to Ferelden to join the Inquisition.

Tevinter Pumpkin Bread is one of Dorian's favorite foods. They are wonderful treats with limited ingredients, and can be made in a pan.

The Hero of Ferelden's mabari is very good at finding items. One time he even found a cake of a chocolate cream variety, topped with white frosting and fresh strawberries. Devon's mother nearly lost her mind trying to keep the Hero of Ferelden's mabari out of her larder.

Sugar Cake is a simple, humble cake topped with a sweet mixture of butter, sugar and almonds. Devon purchased one from a surface dwarf merchant who assured them that it would be well-received by any companion. The merchant told Devon that even the Hero of Fereldan purchased a few of these cakes as companion gifts.

Varric can disarm with humor, charm or through his spy network. Peoples' exasperation at his nicknames amuses him. He has a soft spot for the softer heroes, like Merrill, Bethany and Cole.

Cinnamon Rolls are one of Varric's favorite sweets. They are warm, sweet and comforting, perfect for time spent reminiscing.

Varric loves pastries, to the point that he's liable to steal them off windowsills if they have been left there to cool unattended.

Devon had an extensive consultation with Varric in order to put together the recipe for Varric's Favorite Pastries.

Varric loves sweets.

Isabela once played a drinking game where participants drank based on the number of enemies they had. This game killed a man.

Lampreys are one of Thedas' more unique-looking creatures. They have long slender bodies and toothed, suction-cup mouths. They are rare in Thedosian cuisine as they have noxious flavors. Lord Norbert de la Haine, who wanted to conquer the Free Marches, had a peculiar, singular fondness for pickled lampreys.

Iron Bull loves sweets. Hot chocolate is a particular favorite of his, to the point that it's practically a necessity for him. He swears by cocoa powder which is sometimes difficult to find (in the south). He takes his with hot milk and some Orlesian guimauves.

The classic Rivaini Tea Blend is probably the most famous tea blend in Thedas. It's a mixture of peppermint, lemon verbena, oregano and licorice root. This combination is soothing and said to have healing properties. Celene of Orlais drinks this tea throughout the day to alleviate headaches.

Other / unspecified / general

Preserved foods play an important role in many different cultures across Thedas. They help communities weather times of scarcity (e.g. in winter) and allow people to make long journeys away from home.

Lentil and onions are Thedosian stapes found in every pantry across Thedas. They're relatively inexpensive, keep well for long periods and go with almost anything. They play a supporting role in many dishes.

Fluffy Mackerel Pudding is a unique combination of mackerel, onion, celery and eggs that is strongly associated as a dish with Feast Day, when it is often eaten (as "Feast Day Fish"). There are stories that several decades ago, someone once attempted a diet consisting entirely of this dish.

There is a type of 'blood' soup which is vibrant red due to beetroot. It has a rich, earthy flavor and is topped with roasted chickpeas. This dish could either be one Merrill makes (since "Sera's Yummy Corn" is Sera's recipe, and this is "Merrill's Blood Soup"), or else it's named after her.

Roasted turkey is a dish that is sometimes cooked when having guests over for a dinner party.

Allowing nugs near kitchen pantries and stores is a recipe for disaster. They are voracious omnivores.

Sera's Yummy Corn recipe is simple, yet strict, with no wraps and no non-yellow corn. The corn should be checked for rot, peeled halfway, washed, cooked, peeled again and eaten. Devon holds that other varieties of corn would work fine too, but when they suggested this to Sera she was so disgusted that they couldn't bring themselves to try it. Devon assures the reader that merchant-bought corn is fine however.

Fruit cobbler is also a dessert known/made in other groups in Thedas, not just the Dalish, as Devon's mother baked it for them when they were young. Devon's mother usually made her cobblers with strawberries and rhubarb stems (not leaves, as those are poisonous).

There is a big variety of custards across Thedas.

Cinnamon Rolls are warm, sweet and comforting, perfect for time spent reminiscing.

Sugar Cake is a simple, humble cake topped with a sweet mixture of butter, sugar and almonds. Devon purchased one from a surface dwarf merchant who assured them that it would be well received by any companion. The merchant told Devon that even the Hero of Fereldan purchased a few of these cakes as companion gifts.

Lampreys are one of Thedas' more unique-looking creatures. They have long slender bodies and toothed, suction-cup mouths. They are rare in Thedosian cuisine as they have noxious flavors. Lord Norbert de la Haine, who wanted to conquer the Free Marches, had a peculiar, singular fondness for pickled lampreys.

The Gilded Horn is a tavern which sells drinks like Hissing Drakes. Hissing Drakes have fiery effects on the stomach such that no sober individual would dare to down more than a single glass at a time. Drinking several in quick succession is quite a feat and formed the basis of a drinking game among some drunk young men that Devon witnessed. The men managed two or three servings before vomiting over the balcony.

There are many ways to dress up a cup of hot chocolate.

Antivan Sip-Sip packs a punch. People who are capable of downing an entire glass are made of quite stern stuff. Devon speculates that it's called a "sip-sip" because each sip of it must be chased by a sip of something else. When Devon tried it, they could scarcely manage more than a small sip at once, even though they also had a big glass of water at the time.

Dragon Piss burns like a dragon's breath both in the glass and going down.

Tea is a nice accompaniment for sweet treats. Tea exists in many blends. Devon likes deciding which biscuit to pair with different blends.

Snails aren't common in Lowlander cuisine and many Lowlanders are unconvinced on eating/trying them.

Nevarran flat bread goes from dough to ready to eat in minutes, contrasting other methods of making bread which involve baking loaves for hours.

Travel by carriage is mentioned.

Despite the name the drink The Golden Nug is pink. Inspiration for the drink was drawn from typical living nugs rather than the golden statues. The drink is made of a base of white Seleney wine sweetened with a splash of West Hill Brandy. This dilutes the color of the pomegranate juice and mulled raspberries into a soft, pinkish hue. The goal is to imitate the color of a typical nug.

Chantry sisters make some marvelous creations, including a spirit used in the making of The Emerald Valley drink which is distilled from over seventy different herbs and flowers. This spirit has a complex, varied flavor bursting with the freshness of a green valley.

Nettles are nutritious and delicious.

Source of the above information: Dragon Age: The Official Cookbook - Tastes of Thedas

If you’re not able to get the book, and there’s a recipe or two in the Contents that you’d like to see/read, let me know and I’ll show you. (❁´◡`❁)

[☕ found this post or blog interesting or useful? my ko-fi is here if you feel inclined. thank you 🙏]

[reidsaurora]

"Night Mama" ~ E. Prentiss

Summary: Just a cute lil blurb about Emily and her partner as new parents 🫶🏻

Pairing: Emily Prentiss x GN!Reader

Word Count: 623

Content Warning: very mild swearing, mentions of breastfeeding but nothing in detail, mentions of pregnancy, lmk if I missed anything!!

Genre: domestic fluff, what else would you expect from me

Extra Notes: this is one of the cutest things i've ever written and you can fight me if you say otherwise 😤 /j

Based On the Request: "How long has it been since you slept?" (requested by @lcvingprentjss)

Originally Written: 01/29/2023

Beta Read By: @lukeclvez

Criminal Minds masterlist can be found here!

ofwilliamandwalter's 1K cocktail party

🍸 Spencer's Sauvignon Blanc - send me a character + prompt and i'll write you a small blurb!

It wasn't until I rolled over and felt that the other side of the bed was empty that I realized Emily wasn't there.

My heart raced with panic. What if one of the killers she's arrested has come back for revenge? I thought. Quickly, I decided I couldn't take any chances and reached over on the nightstand for my phone.

It wasn't until I had dialed up 9-1-1 that I heard soft coos coming from the baby monitor. Thank goodness I didn't press the call button. I let out a deep sigh of relief before forcing myself up from the bed and trodding off to the nursery.

A tired Emily blinked at me, her voice coated with a sleep-deprived drawl as she asked, "What are you doing awake?"

"I rolled over and you weren't there," I answered, reaching up to wipe the sleep from my eyes. "How long has it been since you slept?" I asked, noticing the purple underneath her eyes and her near inability to keep them open.

"Nearly five hours since I got a nap in but since I got a full night's sleep? Um, about three weeks. The last couple weeks of my pregnancy kicked my ass."

"Babe, three weeks?" I questioned before walking over to her, holding my arms out for the baby.

"No, it's fine, really. I have to get up and nurse her every two hours like clockwork, just like Dr. Beckett, and Dr. Reid, said. Besides, she just finished eating. All that's left is burping her."

"Then you give Lilly to me and get yourself to bed."

"But-"

"No buts, Emily. You are working so hard. I am so proud of you. I mean, your body just carried and made an entire human for ten months, you're healing from all the postpartum stuff, you've been trying to get back to work already. Thank God that JJ put an end to that idea."

I took a deep breath, sitting down on the ottoman across from her. "All those things are amazing, Em. But it doesn't make you any less of a mom if you ask for help sometimes. So please, let me take Lilly and you get to bed."

She let out a soft groan, but stood before placing Lillian in my arms and shuffling toward the door. "Please come get me if anything goes wrong."

I looked up at her with a raised brow. "Em, I love you, otherwise I wouldn't have married you, but respectfully, I will not be doing that."

She let out a soft huff but turned and headed down the hallway. I could've sworn I heard her snoring before she ever even passed the doorway.

"Come on, Miss Lillian. You think you can give me a big ol' burp, sweet girl?" I cooed, patting the baby on the back.

She was nearly a replica of Emily. She had her brown eyes, the same jet black hair Emily had before she stopped dyeing it, that same freckle on her shoulder that Emily never knew about until I told her. Lillian was just like her mother, beautiful and perfect in every way.

After about five minutes, Lillian finally burped, and just like her mother, she nearly fell asleep as soon as she was finished.

Upon reaching our bedroom, I spotted Emily, who had successfully made it back to bed, quiet puffs escaping her parted lips. I giggled at the sight before placing Lilly back into her bassinet on Emily's side of the bed, leaning down to give her a kiss on her nearly bald head.

I crawled into bed beside the sleeping lump of Emily, leaving a kiss on the exposed freckle of her shoulder. "G'night, Mama," I barely got out. "Sweet dreams."

I AM ABSOLUTELY IN LOVE WITH HOW THIS TURNED OUT, I LITERALLY CANNOT

I hope I wrote this as gender neutrally as possible. I actually imagined Emily having a sp*rm donor while writing this for some reason because I just love the idea of Emily going through lists upon lists and hating every sp*rm donor because she thinks they're all ugly (because she's a lesbian and hates men) so maybe I'll make a second part about that because I just absolutely love the idea of lesbian!Emily still wanting to be a mom and still wanting to do all the work 🥹

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[corpocyborg]

Find The Word - Manuscript Search Tag

Thanks for the tag, @merge-conflict! To be honest, I could do this tag game about a thousand times and never get tired of it. 😅

Word #1: Chrome

She was growing very fond of her new body. It had clearly been designed to resemble her old one, although the signs of its fully mechanical nature were not exactly subtle. Wires and chrome were exposed in several places, and she had the impression that the body was meant to be customizable. Maybe limbs could be swapped out, upgraded? 

But for the most part, she looked like herself, with the notable absence of the devilish billy goat tattoo branded with the Arasaka logo - the one she’d received courtesy of her former brain parasite. In its stead was the Arasaka logo itself, conspicuous in black against her pale artificial flesh. Whoever’d given her that had a sense of humor.

Word #2: Whisper

No matches. Apparently, I tend to use “spoke/said softly” more often for whatever reason? But, hey, same difference, right?

“It shouldn’t matter how I spoke to Fingers,” V said softly. “I said what I needed to get what I wanted."

Judy still wouldn’t look at her, keeping her gaze stubbornly locked towards the base of the staircase. But V could tell her anger was starting to cool off, and she weighed her actions carefully to avoid rekindling it. She’d stay silent until Judy was ready to talk to her. 

Finally, Judy spoke up. “Ends justify the means, huh?”

“Don’t they?" V asked. "If my refusal to antagonize the person who might be able to tell us where Evelyn is leads us to finding her in time to save her life, would you consider that worth it?"

Word #3: Burn

She switched over to the next mode, and the shock of it nearly overburnt her processor. She could sense not only every room on the floor, but every floor in Arasaka Tower - from Izanagi at the bottom to the Night City duplicate of Saburo Arasaka’s office at the top. For a while, she watched the Arasaka employees moving and working throughout the building. In this view, they reminded her of gears in a machine or neurons in a brain. She could recognize a synchronized pattern in their motions, see the order in the chaos. 

Word #4: Sky

I shared this blurb already, but it's the only match I have.

“To make the right decisions with imperfect knowledge,” Takemura said, “that is how you become the world’s most powerful man. One hundred candidates standing at attention, and Arasaka-sama looked into each of our souls and chose the one who would serve him best.”

V was gazing away from him, towards the city. The setting sun had transformed the sky into a golden backdrop for Arasaka Industrial Park. Her hands were gripped around the fence that separated her from the sight. A little too hard, maybe. She’d dented the metal in that thoughtless way that only one with arm cyberware can.

“So you did what you had to.” she said.

“I sense that you judge me.” His voice was quiet, with a barely perceptible edge of harshness. “And yet you have no right to. Unlike you and your friend Mr. Welles, I was not arrogant. I did not take the easy path.”

V’s eyes snapped back to Takemura in surprise. “Wasn’t judging you.”

“Untrue.” Takemura insisted. “You oppose the corporations, their order, their world, in a mindless way, yet you offer no worthy alternative.”

V sat in silence. How the fuck’d he gotten that idea? Must be mixing her up with Johnny. But then, she thought, haven’t exactly been acting like myself lately. Even before the Relic.

“You’ve got it all wrong,” she finally said. She shook her head. “I know you think I’m just some common thief, but my values now are the same as when I worked for Arasaka. I believe in doing my job well.”

“There are no clean hands.” Takemura said cryptically. “But it is important how they become dirty.”

V scoffed. “Wish everyone at Arasaka felt that way.”

“As do I.”

Tagging: @another-corpo-rat, @just-a-cybercroissant, @bnbc. No pressure of course!

Words: recognize, eyes, step, error

[papaya-inspiration]

2024 Reads in Review Asks for you 📘

1, 2, 7, 16, 17, 21.

Ooh, so many to answer!

Faves of the year

This is extremely hard to pick, but I have to go with The Lady Astronauts series by Mary Robinette Kowal, starting with The Calculating Stars. These books are just so amazingly written, and so for me. They have some of the best character writing I've ever seen, some of the most thrilling plots, and some really fantastic merging of real space science, real history, and just enough speculative fiction freedom to make them soar.

Honorable Mentions: The Chosen and the Beautiful by Nghi Vo, Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow by Gabrielle Zevin, Significant Zero by Walt Williams, and Piranesi by Susanna Clarke (a reread, but always a fave.)

2. Flops of the year

House on the Cerulean Sea by TJ Klune. Without a doubt. I have ranted and raved in several places now about what an absolute heap of soggy cotton candy this book is. I cannot for the life of me understand why it's gotten all the buzz it has. It's saccharine, condescending, thematically confused, boring, badly paced, and nearly every piece of the established world building falls apart the minute you think about it for two seconds.

Two other lesser disappointments included: Kingdom of Ash and Birars by Hannah West (generic YA fantasy with middling to poor execution) and Things Have Gotten Worse Since We Last Talked by Eric Larocca (good first story, but the other two in the collection where confused, shock-value nonsense.)

7. Wasted Potential: Great premise and/or characters but fell down on execution

Elder Race by Adrian Tchiakovsky for sure. It's stuffed full of tropes that I love (a stranded scientist struggling for meaning, the meeting of science an myth, and even a good dose of eldritch horror at the end) but I just couldn't connect with the characters, and there were some odd story telling choices that I feel really hamstrung the overall experience. I'd love to see this same concept written by an author I connect with more, like Becky Chambers, who could add some much need texture and heart to the whole thing.

16. Biggest surprise?

Vespertine by Margaret Rogerson! Based on the cover and blurb, I expected this to be a middling YA fantasy with an unwelcome enemies to lovers plot that I'd read for book club and then forget about a few weeks later. Turns out it was an extremely well written, fast paced story about two very traumatized people helping each other grow--and the particular EtL relationship I was worried about never even materialized. Instead, we got several different really heartfelt friendship plots and a cool magic system and I am HERE for it.

Honorable mention also goes to Slow Boat by Hideo Furukawa, which is a novella I pulled off a bookstore shelf almost at random and then devoured in an afternoon. I don't know what I was expecting, but what I got was strange, sardonic, and quite enjoyable.

17. New author (either to you, or with a recent debut) you're hoping to read more of?

Victoria Goddard! I read The Hands of the Emperor and The Return of Fitzroy Angursell and really loved both. They are excellent hopepunk high fantasy, and she has a sprawling world of interconnected novels that I would love to dive into more. Though I hope and pray someday she gets picked up by an agent and published by a traditional publisher with a more intensive editing style--all her books are self published and while they are fantastic, they are prone to bloat and inconsistent exposition manage ment. I think the work of a professional editor could really take them to the next leve.

Honorable mention for this is Ann Leckie. I will absolutely be finishing the Imperial Radch series this year, and hopefully reading the side books in it as well!

21. Best recommendation from a friend

I'm not sure if I should count my book club books in this or not. If not... I think I'll go with either Witch Hat Atelier or Significant Zero.

[thugbiscuits]

wip wednesday except it’s lovey’s nonsensical ramblings that will only make sense to the 0.01% of freaks with adhd 18+ ONLY minors DNI ageless/blank blogs will be blocked.

wip #1: based on this post i made, and you can see that i don’t have a character in mind yet 😂. if anyone has tips on how to make this as vague as humanly possible pleaseee lmk. tbh this gives me logan/joel vibes.

⭐️⭐️⭐️

after an hour of getting yourself ready, hair, makeup, outfit, even putting on those lashes that took forever to apply. seriously, who made those so difficult? you looked great. your boyfriend was having his mates over, which meant that you were heading out for a girls night of your own. parallel play except while they were pounding beers on the couch, you were going to be getting flirty and fine on the dance floor with your girlfriends.

who could be to blame?

him, of course.

there had been. maybe there was a part of you that wanted to be caught. to relieve all those times in the grimy bathroom of your favorite bar when he had bent you over the sink and destroyed your pussy. the fabric was bunched over your waist, and heels there as he used it for leverage to fuck you better.

"told you — fuck, told you not to wear this fucking skirt again."

tingling is a phantom sensation of his hips bruising your ass because he fucked you that hard.

plap, plap, plap.

short, quick thrusts from behind. he's doesn't stay out of you for too long before shoving his rock hard dick back into your pussy. he'd been hard all night, before you even left the house he had to take you over against the front door. and now was no different as he had you bent over, skirt up, and staring right back at him in the mirror. even now you can hardly keep up with his thrusts, each one knocking your hips harder into the sink. while you struggle to stay steady on your feet.

"f i ever see this damn thing again i'm ripping it off of you. you hear me?"

the rumbling bass in his voice made it hard to understand what he was saying, so gritty with anger and pure lust. it was always in one pretty ear and out the other with you. even worse when the tip of his cock prodded your sweet spot. god, you were going to be the death of him.

"hey,"

his tongue presses against the inside of his tooth, making a click sound. admittedly caught your attention quicker than you would've liked. your eyes fly open to stare back at him in the mirror. and he has the nastiest grin on his face, having realized a new kink about his girl. maybe you'd finally fucking listen if he did that more.

"good girl." he chuckled darkly, before plunging back into your wet walls. making you both cry out from the pleasure.

a shiver runs down your spine, and you’re brought back to reality by the clenching of your walls around nothing.

no time to turn back now, right?

———————

wip #2: captain curly x petite!reader. the way riding Curly would change my brain chemistry. and as a petite person myself... man. not sure if these will be headcanons or a blurb, only time will tell xx

⭐️⭐️⭐️

feet planted on the bed to give him more vigor to thrust up into you. the first slap of his hips against yours nearly knocks you off his lap, as your hands fly out to his chest to steady yourself.

btw you should 100% tug on his chest hair, it why it's there.. he'd probably let out the prettiest noises for you.

he is making you mrs. curly tonight !! and mama curly, if you're into that.. he is. but he won't tell you.

though with the way he's burying himself inside of your walls like a newfound home, it's clear that he wants to knock you up lol. curly needs to breed you to know that you're his, nobody else can have you.

"it's just me in here, baby. all me in that pretty belly of yours. fuck, can you feel it?"

he says breathily into your ear.

⭐️⭐️⭐️

- if you wanna see more of these wips pls send an ask or comment. i love sharing :)

[wolfreader]

november 2024 wrap-up - adult fiction

this month i read three (3) adult novels and one (1) adult novella.

the frugal wizard's handbook for surviving medieval engalnd by brandon sanderson 📖 🌟🌟🌟🌟

brandon sanderson has got to stop writing protagonists who are sad pathetic little losers with no friends. i end up relating to them way too heavily and i'm starting to feel personally called out.

i think this is a contender for "best first brandon sanderson book", because it's not connected to the cosmere but it still carries all of the hallmarks of sanderson's writing and worldbuilding style. especially his penchant for blending scifi and fantasy - that's something that will show up in most of his works, so if you want to get into sanderson this might be a great place to start to see if you vibe with it.

mistress of lies by k. m. enright 📖 🌟🌟🌟🌟

i don't know what i expected from this book. i first heard about it from the cait corrain scandal, and put it on my "24 books to read in 2024" list because the description interested me. then as it got close to release i started seeing it described as a romantasy (rather than a fantasy), which is a genre i really don't enjoy, and seeing it compared to books i hate or blurbed by authors i dislike. so that kind of put me off. but it was on my list and it was on sale at my b&n, so i picked it up.

and i quite liked it!! i think it was maybe a little too long - it started to drag a bit at the end - but i found all three main characters really compelling. usually with multi-pov book i end up liking one character way, way more, and while i definitely still have a favorite the gap between them and the second favorite isn't nearly as wide as it normally is for me. really excited to see where this series goes.

i will say, the back of the book says that this is a book about vampires. the goodreads page lists it as a book about vampires. my initial interest was because it was advertized as a book about vampires. there are no vampires in this book. i don't even think they use the term "vampire" once. so don't pick this up if you're wanting a vampire book, regardless of what the marketing says.

the last of dragon the east by katrina kwan 📚 🌟🌟🌟

i have never read a book that felt more like fanfiction in my life. even books that i know were literally once fanfiction, or books that draw obvious heavy inspiration from things i have watched / read, have felt less like fanfiction.

unlike those books, it's not that it feels like it can be tied to a specific other piece of media. like, i couldn't tell you for certain what this is fanfiction of (though i have a guess, based off the author's previous work and the other authors that appear to be in her circle), but it reads like fanfiction even more than those other books.

the short pagecount, the length of the chapters, the oddly juvenile writing style and light tone that clash with the scale of the story, the odd pacing that swaps between breakneck in some areas but painfully slow in others, the soulmates, the insta love, the circular plot, the flat villain. this reads like dozens of completed multi-chapter fics i read on ao3 when i was 15. if you had put this in a shitty self-published-esque cover, handed it to me, and told me it was printed and bound fanfiction of show or book series i'd never heard of, i'd believe you.

a fine read i guess, but completely forgettable.

the way home: two novellas from the world of the last unicorn by peter s. beagle 📚 🌟🌟🌟

another item knocked off of my "24 books to read in 2024" list!

less vague than the last unicorn was, to be sure. it's more clear exactly what's happening (at least in the first novella). there was a weird and, in my opinion, tasteless sexual assault plot point that added nothing adn didn't seem to have any reason for being there... but other than that it was fine.

[jodilinbio]

2017

January 2017

Jan 1 Mary dumped me after informing me that someone informed her that I was supposedly talking about her unfairly in my blog. By this time I wasn't surprised, but it still angered me that I was used for so many years just to be dumped in the end.

Jan 20 For $175 our hot water tank is fixed. The thermocouple went out and the Sears guy replaced it.

Jan 26 Won an issue of a rat magazine based in Canada on Facebook.

February 2017

Feb 1 Had a case of food poisoning and puked for the first time in nearly 20 years.

Feb 17 Really like a website I found that generates random names for story characters.

My story Locked-In is done at just under 18,000 words!

March 2017

Mar 17 Hoping to adapt to sleeping to Sense's sound machine, though I may have to use the louder one when sleeping during the daytime.

Mar 31 Slept with Pink Noise an Amazon Prime relaxation track I set to repeat. Hoping all I'll need for sleep is Alexa. Trying to do more on fewer devices.

April 2017

Apr 2 Rosemarie's Revenge is my CampNaNoWriMo project, but I'm also working on Kinky Kathleen and Someone Else's Lady.

May 2017

May 17 In just a little over two months, I have finished The People Project where I give a brief blurb on everyone I can remember knowing/meeting.

May 25 Starting Clonidine soon for help with ADD/sleep and yes, anxiety too, should it rear its ugly head once again.

Jun 3 Definitely done with the Clonidine. It knocked me out but caused me to sleep shitty as hell. No more meds other than the two I take!

Jun 20 TSH is 16. Ugh! That’s due to the skips but it was necessary to curb my anxiety.

Jun 21 I don't know if I'm looking at a whole new problem or not, but both my red and white blood cell counts are high. Seeing the doctor later.

Jun 29 Still struggling with hot flashes and other symptoms of menopause. Took my first dose of Amberen. So far so good, though it might have made me drowsy.

July 2017

Jul 11 Maliheh's email account was hacked by someone pushing weight loss products. Surprised she still has me in her contacts after all this time.

Jul 16 Love that I found a way to block a few people that have blocked me on Facebook! Now if they ever unblock me they still won't see my account.

Jul 18 Met Mary who lives in the back corner of the circle. She stopped to ask me what was going on with all the street digging. Joy said they're in the final phase of redoing their irrigation system after four years and it's going to go on another week and a half.

Jul 20 Sent a message to Scot B on Facebook.

August 2017

Aug 1 Scot blocked me. Why, I do not know.

Aug 3 Discovered Grammarly! It may not be perfect but I love watching my stories and journals get more and more correct as I go through them.

September 2017

Sep 7 TSH is 15! This proves that perimenopause really is the root cause of my anxiety, even though the medication can still fuel it.

Sep 20 Getting a mouthguard and two partial crowns for $600 total. Was great seeing the dental team despite the costs, especially Kathleen.

October 2017

Oct 17 Accidentally pulled a crown out while flossing. Took the dentist just 5 minutes to re-crown me.

Oct 19 TSH is 6.75!

Oct 27 My very first "real" journal entry is 30 years old today!

November 2017

Nov 3 Reconnected with Kim but not Aly. Having fun catching up via DM on Twitter.

Nov 17 Making one last-ditch effort to try to combat the problem with traffic waking me up with a $25 pillow sound machine. Fingers crossed!

Nov 19 Getting new windows for the bedroom as I've had it with this shit. Ruining my peace is one thing, stealing my sleep is another.

Nov 27 Stepping into Psycho is now finished with just under 24K words!

December 2017

Dec 2 So SO fucking pissed and so fucking tired of dealing with the same old health issues year after year. My white blood cell count is slightly elevated, my cholesterol is bad, and my TSH jumped from 6 to 11. WTF? How???

Dec 4 Back from my PCP appt. She wants me to see a hematologist. :(

Aly made my day by tweeting me a birthday wish, though not directly. While I found it a bit odd that she didn’t tweet directly to me, I really appreciate the birthday wish!

Dec 8 Thrilled to hear from Aly!

So glad I never met with Marie in 2010 as I've come to realize just how fucked-up she is. She didn't do anything to me but I had an interesting chat with her ex. I'll always care about her but she is really screwed up probably beyond help.

[fromthebeddesk]

My WIPs Listed By How Done They Are (+ A Synopsis!)

I thought I'd give you sort of an overgrown blurb for each story, as well as what stage it's in. Hopefully I can get these all finished and published, lol. 😆

Let me know which one is your favorite based on the blurb, or just AMA!

A Shard Of Memory (Newly Finished!!)

A little girl lost her home and childhood to an army of dark mages with the power to erase memories. That power works on nearly everyone but her. She’s all grown up now, and she’s ready to take them down to protect what she has left.

Twenty-year-old Shaellyn spends her time running the Land’s End tavern, visiting with friends, and keeping her younger brother Emrys out of trouble. Then everything changes when Shaellyn and Emrys’s old friend Twister arrives with news of an impending invasion.

These same invaders, the Qaret Mysterium, drove Shaellyn and Emrys out of their original home country as children, separating them from their parents. They barely survived long enough to make it to Raqut, the city where they’ve lived for the past ten years. Now Raqut is in danger too. But this time, Shaellyn is tired of running.

She and her friends hatch a plan to save their city, and after it goes wrong, they realize they might just end up making history along the way.

Storm Crosser (Draft 1)

A young monk named Aleii must pass through the Storm Wall forming the edge of the known world to find her long-lost parents and the source of her strange magic. The Wall has been there for thousands of years, supposedly to protect the people inside from the dangerous shadows that would otherwise invade. But when Aleii gets a glimpse of the outside world, she realizes that isn't the case: the people outside also view the Storm Wall as protection, a prison for the horrors inside it.

Outside the Storm Wall, the world is bigger, more dangerous, and way more confusing than she could have imagined. As Aleii digs further into her past, she discovers that she might be not just a mage, but a demigod. More importantly, she's the only one who can bring down the Storm Wall and reunite the two worlds without repeating the devastating war that split them in the first place. You know, no pressure, right?

The Changeling Trilogy (Draft 1)

Sixteen-year-old River Collins is pretty sure she’s average: No special talents, no siblings, two dads who love her to pieces but don’t always understand her, and a fairly ridiculous number of cats. She’s wrong, and not just because of the cats.

One day, she and her Dads are captured and separated by strange warriors riding giant moles, which is her first introduction to the Fae Kingdoms: the worldwide cave system where all faeries and magical beasts now live after literally going underground during the Middle Ages. While imprisoned there, River learns the truth: she's a changeling, an artificially created faery baby swapped out for a human one shortly after birth so the faeries could raise the human one as a pet.

All changelings who haven't been sent to the human world to replace human children live in the Fae Kingdoms as slaves. But now, a rebellion is brewing. River escapes, and makes allies in her quest to find and rescue her Dads.

Even as she comes into her own as a rebel leader, the challenges she faces in freeing her people become harder and more dangerous than she could ever have imagined. To win the war she started, she's going to need every bit of strength she can muster and any alliances she can make, no matter how dangerous they might be.

God-Touched (Draft 1/Outlining)

The irreverent take on Christian mythology and heart-wrenching sibling devotion of Supernatural meets the gloriously queer chaos of She-Ra and Nimona in a setting something akin to Star Wars.

I can't explain it any better than that.

The Charter of Souls (Outlining)

When Hannah and her siblings snuck out one night to experiment with their magic, they weren’t expecting to end up on an epically dangerous roadtrip with an artificial dwarf and a snarky haunted skull. They REALLY weren’t expecting to meet their long-lost fourth sibling, who’s on the opposite side of a brewing magical war. They’re the only ones who can get her back, save the world, and hopefully not die in the process.

This is my main Middle-Grade project. Think if Percy Jackson had been written based on esoteric Golden Dawn lore instead of greek mythology. The protagonists are goofy bickering triplets and their mentor is a toddler-sized homunculus dude named Clam who’s based more than a little on Stan Pines.

The Lightbringer Chronicles (Brainstorming)

Brianna Buckman has been raised an atheist. So much so that she’s not familiar with anything but the very basics of Christian mythology. So when she starts having flashbacks from things that never happened and seeing true-form demons and angels everywhere – plus a fallen angel in the mirror every day – she doesn’t know what they are and thinks she’s going crazy. So, she tells her parents she needs therapy.

But when she learns from the archangel Michael (posing as her therapist) that it's all real and she's none other than Lucifer, Brianna is determined to redeem herself and get her memories back. Just one problem with that: God, the only one who can fully grant her memories back, is missing. In his absence power-hungry angels are fighting over Heaven.

Brianna, Michael, and their sister Gabi (Gabriel) have to find God, and quickly, if they're going to survive the coming war or have any hope of protecting the human world.

Expect lots of trauma, female rage and poetical metaphors

[elenajohansenreads]

Books I Read in 2023

#12 - Love is Blind, by Lynsay Sands

Rating: 1/5 stars

DNF @ 25%. I got to the first kiss, was unimpressed, gave up.

I put this in my queue ages ago because the premise sounded cute from the blurb, and possibly would lead to some interesting dynamics. But in reality that cute premise comes across as laborious and heavy-handed and genuinely sad, but not in the good way, like you want.

Clarissa is so nearly-blind that without her glasses (omg I'm tired of the word "spectacles" even if it's period-appropriate) she's incapable of performing most everyday tasks. Her stepmother is such a shrew that she would rather Clarissa be an extremely clumsy and off-putting potential wife than a functional person who can she what she's doing while trying to catch a husband, because apparently wearing glasses is worse than the constant stream of accidents Clarissa causes, in terms of marriage marketability. As such, Clarissa is too nearly-blind to see the apparently horrific scar on the Adrian's face, and gets to know him based on his personality instead. (At this point the story has not really explained to me why Clarissa's father is a non-entity who apparently doesn't give a fig that his second wife is a harpy who abuses his daughter. Because yes, maliciously depriving someone of a disability aid is abuse.)

Except I couldn't get invested in the supposed romance because I was just depressed that this woman lived a life so controlled by the expectations of society and the machinations of her stepmother that she falls in love with the first person to show her any shred of decency. Like, the entire courtship is Adrian doing basic, thoughtful things to make Clarissa's time with him easier. They're not connecting on any deep, spiritual level, or bonding over mutual interests (beyond one scene where they like the same author, when Adrian reads her a book) he's just nice to her, and that's really sad to me.

If Adrian really wanted to impress me as a reader, he should spirit her away from her stepmother long enough to buy a new pair of glasses; he would fix the problem, instead of easing the symptoms. Even if she could only wear them when they were together (her stepmother stole and destroyed her original pair) that would still be better than doing his minimal best to accommodate her "blindness." (My apologies to the author, I suppose, if this happens later in the book and I didn't get to it because I was so exhausted by how sad this all was.)

Even worse than the long-walk-to-a-simple-concept plot was the narrative style, though. I didn't finish the book, but based on the first quarter of it, the whole thing is at least twice as long as it needs to be, just from phrase repetition. When we're in Clarissa's POV, she can't stop repeating how much easier her life would be with her spectacles. When we're in Adrian's POV, it's all about his scar and how much it curtailed his life. And there are many instances where the author gives us information in narration (for example, Adrian has stopped going to gaming hells since getting his scar ) then immediately has a character repeat that information in conversation (Reg saying how surprised he was to see Adrian in a gaming hell because he doesn't go to them since he got his scar.) Or Character A says something to Character B, and Character B repeats the entire thing to Character C, so that I as a reader have to hear it twice, and usually those instances are back-to-back, or close to it: the gaming-hell example was all on the same page

Does the author seriously think readers can't remember things for more than ten seconds, or is the plot so thin that this is deliberate padding to make it novel-length? Either way, I'm done with it.

[notanotherreidgirl]

Pretty In Pink Pt. 2 - Blurb

Summary: Spencer's punishment continues at home

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

Warnings: 18+, edging, spanking, mommy kink, masturbation, sub!spencer wearing panties, degradation

Word Count: 1057

A/N: Clearly, I got carried away. This is a continuation of Part 1 that I wrote as a part of my 1k celebration!

For a profiler, Spencer should really be better at concealing his emotions but he was a complete mess in the bullpen - practically whining out loud when he sat in his chair, dropping his files on the floor, flushing a deeper and deeper shade of red every time someone shot him a concerned look. Eventually Hotch sent him home, saying that if all his paperwork was finished there was no reason to stay in the office, especially if he wasn’t feeling well.

His eyes darted to yours for permission before he accepted Hotch’s offer, strategically shrugging his satchel on in an attempt to hide his erection. As he passed your desk, you caught him by the sleeve and pulled him down. “Be ready for me”

As soon as Spencer was out the door you tore through your files, finishing them in record time before dropping them off on Hotch’s desk. You made some excuse about checking up on Reid and soon enough you were out the door and on your way home. You were pretty sure the team knew about your relationship with Spencer - the energy between the two of you was palpable from the very first day and whatever efforts Spencer made to hide his attraction to you were in vain. No one had said anything though - not even Penelope - and you were grateful. Spencer had such little experience that you wanted to take your time with him, no matter how badly you wanted to make him yours in every way imaginable.

That desire only deepened when you got home to see him waiting for you exactly as you had hoped - sitting in bed with nothing on except those pretty pink panties. You almost gave in right there but then he shifted in a desperate search for friction and whatever mercy you might have granted him was extinguished. “Let me make something perfectly clear. You are not going to come tonight. If you do, I won't touch you for a month, do you understand?”

Disappointment was written all over his face but he held his tongue. “Yes, Mommy. I understand. I’ll be good”

“We’ll see about that.” You crossed the room and regarded him with cold eyes. “Get on your knees”

He was staying true to his promise, getting in position without hesitation. You massaged his ass and he leaned into your touch, letting out a soft sigh when one of your hands drifted between his legs. He was so lost in your touch that the first slap took him by surprise and he yelped, hips bucking forward. You yanked him back by the waistband of the panties, pulling up so the fabric dug into his sensitive sex and extracted a whimper from the back of his throat.

You laid successive blows on each side, the sound of skin against skin reverberating through the entire apartment. Every time you hit him you pulled him back towards you with the panties, making sure to aim so you made contact over the fabric, chafing the sensitive skin. Eventually, his ass turned as pink as his panties and his moans started to blend into each other, signaling the onset of his release.

“Such a dumb, little slut getting off from being spanked.” You stopped abruptly, reaching between his legs and gripping the base of his cock. “Have you already forgotten what I said? Only good boys get to come.”

“No, please. I am a good boy. I can be so good. Let me show you.” His pleas were barely discernible through his tears and you held him in place, denying him any further stimulation until the threat of his orgasm subsided. When you were sure he wouldn’t come, you struck him one last time before opening the drawer of your nightstand. “Lie down, baby”

He scrambled to lay in the center of the bed, wincing when his raw skin made contact with the sheets. You kneeled between his legs, inching your skirt up and parting your legs to reveal your soaked core. You palmed him over the pink fabric, sticky with precum, and he whined. “Please, Mommy. I can’t - I need to come. I need it so bad”

“If you can’t handle my hand then how are you gonna take this?” You brought your other hand from behind your back, revealing the vibrator you grabbed from the nightstand. You switched it to the lowest setting and held it mere inches away from him. “What’s your color, baby?”

“Green! Please, mommy! Don’t stop, I’m so green.” His knuckles went white as his grip on the sheets tightened, physically restraining himself from bucking his hips up into the vibrator. The corner of your lips lifted in a smile as you lowered the vibrator, skimming over the front of the panties and tracing the outline of his hard cock. His whole body shook as he held his orgasm at bay, exercising every iota of self-restraint until it became unbearable. “I-I’m close. I’m so close, please”

With that, you withdrew the vibrator and he threw his head back into pillows, whining as his orgasm slipped away again. “I can tell you’re doing your very best to be good for me, baby. I think you deserve a little break”

He nodded in agreement, not really wanting to stop but knowing that if you edged him again he would surely come. But he wasn’t expecting you to bring the vibrator between your legs, gliding it between your glistening folds and circling your clit without breaking eye contact. He whimpered, fresh tears streaming down his cheeks and hands balled into fists to stop himself from reaching for you. “No, please wait. Don’t do this. Let me make you come, please. I’ll do anything you want”

His begging only spurred you on, slipping in a finger as your release built. “You should be grateful I’m letting you watch. Say thank you”

“Thank you” he mewled pitifully, sending you over the edge with a shout of his name. He watched powerlessly as you rode out your high, the visual of your face contorted in pleasure pushing him to the brink of orgasm. You came down breathlessly, nearly collapsing on him as you regained your bearings. Spencer reached out to you, prepared for cuddles and copious aftercare but you leaned back. “Oh no darling, I’m not done with you yet”

Blurb Masterlist

[purple-heart-x]

Error

I’ve been encouraged to post some of the old, old writing that I have. Very whumpy, though I didn’t know there was a word for that. I’m cringing a little and it’s much less polished than my newer stuff, but enjoy!

---

Summary/Context: Because this started as a blurb between friends, y’all need some context. It go bullet point because Joy no want to make the paragraph make sense

The Healer has some limited magic powers but relies heavily on actual medical practice because she has not fully mastered her power. She is a human, but was gifted healing and several other powers. This is 100% lore and no I will not explain (jk i will have you seen me lore dump in asks lmao)

Jack is a half-ghost, half-human being. He is able to travel dimensions via runes and, as a non-fully-human, is originally from a non-human realm. Think Omen from Valorant? He speaks in bold/italics/both when distressed or in pain. Which both apply here :) He was a stranger to the humans at first, but eventually helped them on their quest. He knew the rovers for a long time, notably Quinn. He had become their friend, but disappeared mysteriously right after their first “adventure” was over. (And now we know, he was captured by Jules)

Quinn is half-human, half-”robot” (not truly a robot, but close.st definition available). He led a group of others of his kind (called rovers) for a long time until a series of events led mainly by Jules brought him, his group, the Healer, and several other similarly-powered humans together. Other rovers include Paragon. (There are more, but they haven’t been introduced yet.) Humans will remain unnamed except the Healer, for now. 

After Jules was defeated back then, they gave up on their previous base and decided to make their new base a huge house (more of a mansion). This is the current setting, for the most part.

Jules is an extraterrestrial menace from Jack’s original universe. They strive to gain power to take over the world. It is unclear why, but they see eliminating Jack as well as all the rovers as essential to their plan succeeding. They do not care about the humans but try to destroy them when they get in their way.

In Chapter 2 I use different text styles like bold and italics to note different people talking. I’m betting you can guess who Quinn is! :D

That’s it for now, feel free to ask anything you’d like. I might continue this, I’ve come to like it.

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Tagging- @shydragonrider 

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If you think you know exactly what universe this is referencing, please do not publicly comment. My DMs should be open.

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TW: Mention of starvation, mans gets injured, fever, delirium, everyone’s got b a c k s t o r y, 

Chapter 1

She ran after his racing form, desperately calling his name as he veered left and right, trying to lose her. She followed close, pleas for him to wait eventually silenced by breathlessness. She decided to gradually slow down, and the next time he changed direction, she pretended to continue away from him. She cut through the trees, just in time to see him summon a small rune to open a portal. Just in time to hesitate then follow him through.

The first thing she noticed was the lack of colour in this place. Everything was reduced nearly to grey, with only faint hints of colour, if any. Jack was standing in the center of a large grey platform, making an obvious effort not to move a muscle despite the beads of sweat on his forehead and the shakiness of each breath he took. He didn’t even notice the huge figure opposite him until they spoke. “Did you arrive without issue?”

They could almost feel his fear as he responded. “I… was followed briefly…”

“And?”

“I lost… them within… ten minutes…”

The figure nodded, staring coldly down at him. “Well, since you failed your simple task…”

Something in him seemed to break his mask and he started to tremble. “P-p-please-- It-- Please, it’s been four d-da-”

“BE SILENT!”

He was starting to hunch inwards, shaking violently by now. “P-p- I--”

They were screaming now, “You thought it would be five days? MAKE IT SIX!”

She barely suppressed her gasp of shock.

And then, he fell. His legs collapsed under him and he fell forward, arms wrapped around his now-still form. They regarded him from their high stance and then left, closing off the platform and the area surrounding it in some cage. 

She silently counted out three full minutes, making sure they were truly gone, before emerging from their hiding place in the shadows. She climbed the steep steps quickly, rushing to his side. Whispered his name. Glanced quickly around to make sure no one heard.

He didn’t respond and no one seemed to hear, so she tried again. He still did not respond. Gently, she turned him over on his back, shocked at how light he was. She grasped his shoulder and lightly shook him, trying not to disturb him too much. “Jack, please… Wake up…”

He finally stirred, slowly opening his eyes. When they landed on her, they widened, and he drew in a breath, throwing an arm out to shield his face. “Please-! Please d- I-!”

She was shocked at how afraid he was. Even in the face of danger, he’d always maintained his grim composure, but now here he was, trembling on the floor, raw fear clear on his face. Immediately, she tried to calm him, speaking quietly so as not to frighten him. “Hey… Jack, it’s okay-- I’m not here to hurt you.”

He tried to say something else, but his already weak arms suddenly gave out. 

She lunged, barely catching him from cracking his head on the ground. Gently, she lowered him to the ground, trying not to show the concern on her face that would only make him panic. Once he realised he had been released, he stared up at her with wide eyes. “H-how… Why… You--”

She was kneeling now, next to him. “I’m not going to hurt you. You are safe with me, I promise you.

He blinked, eyes full of panic fading back down to exhaustion. “I- I- D-didn’t mean t…o… R-run…”

She nodded. “From what I heard, I gather she made you…?”

He nodded. “Sh-she wanted me to… Spy…”

“It’s alright,” she assured him.

He spoke, suddenly. “D-d-do you h-have…Water...”

She was surprised- yet so glad- that he’d asked for it outright. “Yes, here,” she said, unstrapping a water bottle from her belt.

She held it out for him. But although he strained to move his arm, eyes tearing up from the effort, he could not do it. Through the whole thing, he was stuttering, full of fear, trying to beg for her to wait, that he could do it, to please, please-

“It’s okay,” she said softly. “It’s okay. Here, let me help you.”

She helped him sit up, leaning against the edge of the boundary. Little droplets of tears ran down his face, and he was trying not to fully cry, they could feel it. She held the bottle for him, allowing him to finally drink. “It’s alright…”

He looked so desperate for the water. It almost broke her. She tried to keep their mind off it, instead focusing on allowing him to drink his fill. He'd only gotten worse since when she'd first seen him. Each breath came with a shudder and his eyes were by now fluttering. He was trying to say something, but his words slurred. 

She tried to keep the concern off their face. "Jack… I don't think you're doing too well right now after what you've been through, and I don't have many of the things I need to help you. Can I bring you to our base? We can help you there."

His eyes were struggling to stay open. His voice was hoarse and barely audible. "Wi- W-Wi...th th-em-?”

She had to respond honestly. "Yes, with everyone."

His breathing trembled worse as he asked, "With- him?"

She nodded again. "Yes, with him. He misses you, Jack…"

The shivering form blinked. "Oh," he said in a tiny voice.

And then he dropped down into unconsciousness.

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Bonus! Short Chapter :)

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Chapter 2

"What happened?"

"He's here?"

"He's hurt?"

"Where was he?"

"…Jack…?"

She bit her lip and tried to answer the questions as quickly as possible. "He was forced to spy on us for days by- by Jules. They starved him for about four or five days, yet still forced him to run on what appears to have progressed into an ankle broken in three places."

She glanced at her friends' faces. Shock, all of them. Quinn looked sick, refusing to look up from his friend's troubled face as he blinked back tears.

They had to do something. "Somebody get the first aid kit. Somebody else make some tea. No sugar. He won't be able to handle it right now. Is the guest room open?"

Everyone fell into place with the orders. It was time to save their falling friend.

---

Man, y’all are getting content today. One more juicy chapter for tonight.

---

Chapter 3

Two days. That's how long it took for him to wake up. That's how long Quinn stayed up, at his side. Unable to sleep. Only able to sit and watch as the one he loved wavered between life and death.

Two days. That's how long the Healer worked, trying to get him to wake up. How long she tried to hold back her tears for the others. How long she spent each night between checks on him to research in her small personal library.

Two days. That's how long the others feared their shadowy friend would simply disappear in front of them.

Two. Days. That was enough for Jules to know he was gone.

Everyone knew that. Some wanted to fight while others wanted to run. Quinn finally called a meeting the second night. 

"Well, as you may know, Jack is still not awake. And by now it is far enough along that Jules knows he is gone."

Murmurs follows his statements. 

"I also am aware that we are conflicted on what should be done."

Almost immediately, people shouted out their opinions and reasonings. He hushed them. "What I think we must do," he spoke louder to be heard, "is to see if this location is in her view, and if it is…"

Everyone paused as his voice got low. "We'll make sure that digital horror never finds us or hurts us again."

Some people were nodding while others were looking slightly doubtful. But as Jaidan quickly pulled up the database, the Healer came sprinting down the stairs, whispering something in Quinn’s ear. The look on Quinn’s face never changed, but a slight twitch in his facial muscles alerted Paragon. He tilted his head just slightly, and Quinn nodded. He approached the mini “stage” in the middle of the room, which was really just the one misplaced stair that they hadn’t bothered to remove. He picked up where Quinn had left off, a common experience in their household. 

Meanwhile, Quinn was silent as he rushed up the stairs behind the Healer. The minute they’d flown down the stairs, he knew something was wrong. Group meetings were hard enough without interruption, since the group was so big to begin with. “Jack’s woken up,” she whispered urgently, “half-delirious and dreaming he’s being hurt. He’s asking for you.”

Asking, he found, was a stretch. A more accurate word would be begging. As he climbed the final stairs, he could already hear Jack’s ragged sobs from the furthest room down the corridor. The Healer’s dark eyes were sorrowful and concerned as they stepped aside to let him pass before them. He strode quickly down the hall, opening the door cautiously. 

Jack was on the bed, looking tiny even on the small-sized bed. Perhaps that was also partially because he was bent almost double, hands clutched together as if to defend his face, whimpering in complete terror of an unknown attacker. What hit him harder than a sword in the chest, though, was the sentence that kept tumbling out of Jack’s mouth each time his mind perceived another attack in whatever delusion he was trapped in.

“Quinn… H-Help me…” he trembled, “Please, it hurts so bad- Make it stop… Please, make it stop… Quinn, p-please help me…”

And he hadn’t even opened his eyes yet. He didn’t even know Quinn was actually there. There were so many things bubbling in Quinn’s chest, but he pushed them aside as he rushed to the side of the bed, not hesitating to sit on it next to his terrified friend. 

Quinn knew him, knew what would help. He turned slightly, lifting Jack into his arms. As the tiny figure began to struggle, he restrained him, looping an arm around his flailing ones. He hugged him close, firmly, but loosely enough that he wouldn’t feel trapped. “It’s okay,” he said in a soft tone, “I’m here… I’m not going to let them hurt you any more, okay? I’m here now, it’s okay.”

The grey-eyed figure stopped struggling as he recognised the voice. “Q-Quinn?” he asked, squinting without his glasses. 

“It’s me,” he said again, sighing quietly in relief as Jack calmed down slightly. 

Jack swallowed hard, shifting with Quinn’s help to face him. “I-It hurts,” he wept, face still clenched tight with pain. 

“I know, hun, we’re trying to get it to stop,” Quinn whispered gently. 

It was like that for a while, Quinn holding Jack close while Jack held on tighter. It was as if he didn’t truly believe Quinn was actually there, and he clutched tightly to his oldest friend as if to keep him from leaving again. And even though his fingers were digging slightly into Quinn’s skin, he was able to tolerate it by the way Jack’s arms shook with effort. 

Even though Jack was so relieved to have Quinn with him, his body was giving out too much to express it. He was barely able to gasp out anything besides “It hurts”, to which Quinn could only try to soothe him. 

Eventually, he couldn’t even manage that, and started to fall back into unconsciousness. He fell asleep with Quinn stroking his hair lightly.

Quinn nodded to the Healer, who lingered in the doorway, and she gently rested her hands on the injured soul’s waist to bring him to the med table. But the minute her fingertips touched him, he flinched and jolted awake, a tiny, scared noise escaping his lips. 

Before he could panic further, Quinn jumped in. “It’s okay, Jack, that’s just my friend. She’s here to help you feel better, okay? I’m still here. I’m still here, I promise.”

Jack relaxed slightly and allowed the Healer to pick him up. He gave a little nod, and whispered, “O-okay…” as the Healer carried him gently to the next room. 

A whimper lingered in the air.

[officialsimppage]

-Drunk Thoughts-

Request- Maybe a Spencer Reid x reader who rambles facts when drunk and Spencer hears it for the first time and is shocked at how much they know and that it's all correct information?? 

Thank you for requesting! I think this is a good blurb idea, so that’s what I’m going to do! So around 1k to 1.k words? I hope that's fine! This is based around s7! 

I pulled up to the bar the team was planning on going to tonight. I was originally going to hang out with my new puppy, but I guess this is better. I grab my handbag and get out of the car. I’m wearing my new cocktail dress which Is short, red, and low cut. Perfect outfit for a good time. My main goal is to impress Spencer. We have been dating for around 6 months and we haven’t been to a nightclub together! It has been crazy since Emily died, and came back to life. So my plan is to show him what I got. I walk inside and I hear the music blasting and lights going crazy.

 Let me introduce you to my party people

In the club

It's a new generation of party people

Get 'em up, yeah

I walk around until I see Penelope in one of her extravagant outfits. I walk up behind her and tap her on the shoulder.

“Y/N! You made it!” She yells wrapping her arms around me. Obviously drunk already. 

“Wow um hi! You smell like vodka martinis! Where's Spence?” I say laughing. She then laughs and drinks a shot. 

“Drink this!” She says handing me a shot. 

“Oh, oh ok!” I say downing the drink. I feel it burn as the amber liquid goes down my throat. She then smiles and sighs, looks up and down my body and says,

“God you are so beautiful! I wish I had your body with your tiny waist,” grabbing my waist. “And your flat tummy. Oo! It’s sculpted too!” She said as she felt my stomach as if I was pregnant. I catch Spencer's eye and he sees what she's doing and his eyes widen. I mouth ‘Help me!’ to him and he rushes over. 

“Hey Pen, how about you go dance with Morgan!” He says ushering her to him. 

“Oo! Yes!” She says quick walking to Derek. 

“Thank you Spencer you really saved me out there.” I say laughing while drinking a martini. 

“Yep it was a no problem,” Spencer says with a light chuckle taking a sip of his drink. 

“How many drinks has she had?” I whisper to him. 

“Too many obviously.” He says laughing. 

“True, true.” I say poking his shoulder. “Bartender! Give me 3 rounds of shots for me and my hot boyfriend!” I yell while moving around my hand. He then laughs and shakes his head. We get our shots and I down the, creating a burning sensation in my mouth and throat. He gags and then we laugh a little. I order a beer and then say, “Let’s go dance!” He then has a worried look on his face as we go into the crowd. 

I pull Spence to me by his tie and I start swaying my hips to the music. He looks around, a bit uncomfortable, then he looks down at me and puts his hands on my waist. I turn around and start to grind my ass on his crotch as I take a swig of my beer. I feel him put his hands on my hips and move me around with a swave of confidence. I look behind me and I can tell he is enjoying it. And I can feel it too. If you know what I mean.

We finish dancing and we head to the bar to do more shots with the team. We do 4 rounds of shots and that’s when I know I am drunk. Like uberrrr drunk. I turn to Spencer and I say,

“Did you know over the last century, ‘Micheal’ has been the most popular baby name 44 times?” I say I sound  so smart and surprised at myself. 

“U-um Yeah! Wow!” he says looking confused then fact checking it in his head and him knowing I’m right. I smile at him a bit and then say, 

“Tu es si beau mon amour.” smiling at him he looks shocked, then confused, 

“Y- Y/N I know you can speak Spanish bu- but French too?” Does anyone else know that you speak French?” He says whisper yelling. 

“Hehe nooo! It’s a secret!” I whisper at him poking his shoulder. Then I start bursting out laughing for no reason and putting my finger to my lips shushing. “Also, did you know the average American eats around 13 pounds of ice cream a year!” I say, sounding so shocked. HE looks at me with the weirdest face. 

“H-how do you know all of this?” He asks, chuckling, but being confused. 

“Cause I’m super smart like you!” I say pointing poking his forehead and mine. I start laughing so hard I snort. “I’m tired babyyy. I wanna go home!” I say leaning on him putting my head in the crook of his neck. I put my hand on his chest and started whining. 

“Guys I’m going to take Y/N home she's tired.” Spencer says to everyone.

“Ok bye!” everyone says to us 

“ByEe!” I say changing my voice tones. We walk outside to the car and when we get in I spill more facts. 

“Did you also know that fewer than a quarter of adults follow the U.S. guidelines for physical activity? Also, nearly half of American adults will experience a mental illness in their lifetime?” I keep rambling facts all the way home, up the stairs, into Spencer's apartment, and into bed.  

“I still can’t believe you can speak French and know all of those facts.” Spencer says while playing with my hair as I lay on my chest. 

“You will find out a lot about me handsome.” I say patting his chest. “Goodnight Spence.” I say. 

“Goodnight my lady genius.”Spencer says, pulling me close.