#this is gonna hurt like a mf isn’t it?

[myflagmeansace]

me reading through the onslaught of unhinged, angst-filled theories after spending over a year living in my curated OFMD fanfic/fanart world where Ed and Stede are in their happily-ever-after era:

[bokunoheros]

TAGS/WARNINGS: reader is gender neutral but afab, reader and kiri are 3rd yrs (meaning everyone is 18+), biting duh lol, slight blood play (but its only bc kiri’s teeth r so mf sharp), uhm riding ig, idk this is pretty vanilla and also kinda short GENRE: smut & kinda fluff SUMMARY: you finally work up the courage to ask your shark-toothed boyfriend to bite you—something he enjoys much more than he thought he would. WORD COUNT: 765 🦊’s A/N: kiri… you r so precious but also a bad bitch…. anyway i’ll be back for the next three days. god save me

     “i want you to bite me.”

     “huh?!” eijirou pulls away from your sloppy kiss, wiping away the spit on his lips with the back of his hand as he looks at you with a dumbfounded expression. 

     you two had known each other since middle school, and had been dating for about six months now. currently, you were straddling his lap, his dick buried deep within your creamy cunt, with his back propped up against the headboard.

     “you heard me,” you tell him. “please, eiji,” you add, a pout tugging at your lips as you hit him with your best puppy dog eyes. 

     one thing about eijirou kirishima is that he was always careful when it came to you — never being too rough with you, acting as if you were made out of glass or porcelain, when that’s the last thing that you were. you didn’t take it personally, of course, as you knew eijirou was just kinda like that, but still…. you wish he’d do something other than just covering you in kisses. 

     you were well aware of his shark-like teeth, and truthfully, you wouldn’t mind if the jagged fangs drew a little bit of blood…. you’re sure your boyfriend would, though, so you don’t bother mentioning that part to him.

     “are you— are you sure?” he asks, a little hesitant as he looks you in the eye. 

     “never been so sure about anything, baby—please just bite me, i promise this isn’t something i’m asking for on a whim,” you try to convince him.

     “you’ve thought about it before? me biting you?” you can feel his dick twitch inside you, like he liked that you’d been thinking about him. 

     “yeah, so please bite me, baby, i promise you’re not gonna hurt me,” you coo, cupping your boyfriend’s face and pressing a heated kiss to his spit-soaked lips. it’s eijirou who pulls away first, kissing your cheek, and then your jaw, down to your neck, licking over the column of your throat before he nibbles lightly against a particularly sensitive spot and you let out a little moan to encourage him.

     eijirou’s ears perk up at the noise you make, and his dick twitches in response as he bites down a little harder—careful not to draw blood, though, he knew how sharp his teeth were. 

     “harder,” you whimper quietly, rolling your hips down against his, cunt fluttering around his cock. 

     “are you sure? i don’ wanna hut yo—”

     “eiji, please just shut up and bite me,” you whine pathetically, and suddenly eijirou finds himself obeying your request without a second thought, sinking his teeth into your shoulder, so hard that his eyes fly open when he tastes something metallic and coppery—oh shit! oh, fuck! he had drawn blood!

     carefully, he licks up the red liquid and pulls away to look at you—just to find you nearly cross eyed as you tried to ride him, jaw dropped in sheer bliss as you pant heavily, your tits bouncing with each heave of your chest.

     oh. 

     he feels himself get impossibly harder, even without his quirk, and his cock spasms inside your messy cunt as he ruts up into you, firmly grabbing onto your hips as he spreads his legs a little wider and plants his feet against the mattress to start really fucking up into you, and you can feel the wind get knocked out of your lungs.

     “aa–aah! nngh, fuck, eiji—!” it’s all you can do to whimper and moan, grabbing onto his shoulders for stability. 

     bringing his lips back to your skin, he bites at the junction of your neck and shoulder before sucking at the flesh there, working to leave a mark that would last a week at least.

     “mmh,” you hum, nails leaving crescent shaped marks in their wake. “bite me all y’want, baby,” you tell him, one hand threading itself into his spiky hair. it’s not as soft as it could be, due to the gel keeping it up, but you tug gently at the red locks anyway.

     kirishima takes your words at face value, biting and licking all along the surface of your neck, covering it in bite marks, drawing blood in less noticeable places like your shoulders or the base of your neck (unless your hero costume was revealing… in which case, that completely slipped his mind).

     at first, he didn’t quite get the appeal of inflicting pain onto a partner, no matter how minor, but after seeing your reaction, and feeling the way your pussy fluttered around him with each new mark? yeah, he was quick to change his mind.

return to KINKTOBER | MAIN M.LIST

[maaaariii]

Realistic Hanma Shuji Boyfriend Hcs

(bc we all secretly know that he’s an asshole but just don’t wanna admit it.)

- He is NOT gentle. This man does not know how to not hurt someone when touching them. Like even if he doesn’t mean to he just has such a strong grip, it could probably snap your bone in half. If you’re walking in his space he *grabs* you and puts you in your spot- or if you tease him or say a joke at his expense he will laugh and smack the back of your head (boy or girl he doesn’t discriminate ❤️). He’ll pull your hair, pinch your cheeks (it doesn’t even feel cute it feels like ‘I wanna rip your skin off’) bite you..this guy has no chill when it comes to regular touching. (if you shake or hold his hand he’ll try to break your bones by squeezing jsut hard enough then letting go.)

-He says the most backhanded shit ever.

When you don’t wear makeup or style your hair he WILL NOT believe you. He can’t accept that women can be hot without makeup, im sorry but you’re going to have to teach him a lesson. Once you say that you’re not wearing any he’ll give you the dirtiest stink eye and scoff-sometimes even going as far to getting a tissue to wipe your face to see if there’s anything there. And when he finds nothing he’ll shut tf up (for like 10 minutes before bothering you about something else)

-He leaves sus comments on your online posts

Ig this one isn’t that bad but if you post on instagram or Tiktok or anything online, he will comment MULTIPLE TIMES saying weird things (maybe one comment will be dedicated to calling you pretty if you’re lucky) but the rest are stuff like ‘can’t wait to smash 🤑🤑🤑’ or that typical ‘I saw it you can delete now’. Either way make sure you don’t have any family on your social media ❤️(esp if you have strict parents) or just don’t give him any of your handles (he’ll probably find them anyway)

-Is always the loudest mf in the room

This man does not care about being a bother to you or you finding him annoying- even if he’s sat next to you he will yell in your ear and laugh louder than a speaker. Being in public with his loud ahh is….not for the weak ❤️ Saying this I’m also gonna add that he doesn’t have regular conversations- something as simple as you asking ‘how was your day’ can turn into him saying ‘then his guts fell out on my shoe smh’ (and he’s not physically able to be quiet so everyone else whose there hears it lucky you ❤️❤️)

Calls you mean stuff as a ‘joke’ (but kinda not a joke 🥲)

this is pretty self explanatory but unless you stop him the first time he says it he will call you a ‘whore’ a ‘slut’ and will tell you to stop ‘bitching’..but like not in the ‘you are a whore’ way. More like the ‘dayum girl why are you low-key a whore-‘ or ‘dressed like a hoe but i like that’ way (he said it in an affectionate way ig..)

(also sorry for being dead for like a year ig ☺️☺️)

[mini-jiminie]

I can’t even believe I’m writing this out but, apparently a lot of people lack critical thinking skills. Jungkook feigning lunging at jm is not evidence of him having ‘violent’ or ‘aggressive’ tendencies. This is mf Jeon Jungkook we’re talking about.

This is the way people behave with their friends - especially close friends. Dare I say, even couples can joke around with eachother the same way. It’s ridiculous how many posts I’ve seen reiterating that jk was never actually gonna hurt jm. Apparently some insecure people can’t operate the singular braincell that’s floating around in their empty heads.

The entire situation was actually such a gag because socially and culturally speaking, jm has the upper hand in their relationship. He’s the older one. Culturally, it’s pretty unheard of for the younger person to even think of doing what jk did to their elder. But, he can and he did because those two see eachother as equals. Rarely will we see them play into that age hierarchy. Jm occasionally likes to let jk think he has the power. We’ve also seen him assert being the older one if he wants to.

Also, jk’s reaction to Tae’s argument was pretty mild. He disagreed but, wasn’t disgruntled. As soon as jm also disagreed, he seemingly had a problem because:

how dare they not be on the same frequency?

The fact that Tae started the discourse but jm got the brunt of jk’s reaction is hilarious because again, jk feels comfortable enough to joke around to that extent with him. They’re equals in his eyes.

Let’s also point out that Jm took it in stride, playing along with that dramatic ass reaction. If he actually was hurt or the situation was serious (which 🙄) why would the editors keep that scene in the show?? It’s clear that some people only see jk’s value in what he can bring to their ship. If his behaviour doesn’t align with their fantasies, he gets slandered and accused of being a horrible person.

Finally - and I feel like this isn’t brought up enough - but, can we please emphasis that the topic of the convo was spam or pink sausage😭😭

[sophisticatedaiphos]

THIS EVENT GOT EVEN GOOFIER 💀💀

y'all.. this event is SENDING me it's so funny- there's so many funny moments in chapter 4 so here's my favorites:

the mental picture of sebek lifting up idia (who's only like 5 cm/2 in shorter than him-) is SO funny

like imagine seeing some random green haired guy who's tall asf RUNNING through town SCREAMING while carrying an EQUALLY tall, skinny asf guy with FLAMING blue hair ON his back 💀

Poor Trey getting dragged into this shit- even he don't wanna deal with Leona and Malleus's gay petty asf bickering 😭

riddle's tantrums are NOTHING compared to them 💀

Sebek (accidentally) SLAMMING Idia with that comment is also the greatest thing ever-

"hermit" is wild 💀 and the worse part is sebek met it with 100% sincerity, this is the nicest he's been all event and he literally told idia he doesn't go outside enough 😭

(in order to fit the 30 photo limit, i combined the first screenshot with the rest of these screenshots, Vil didn't immediately say the plan after insulting Sebek)

Vil slamming another freshman as a "unwashed, overripened vegetable” never gets old, atleast Sebek isn’t another potato (HE HAD THE CHANCE TO CALL HIM A CABBAGE BECAUSE OF HIS HAIR BUT HE DIDNT AND ITS SO TRAGIC-)

Idia trying his best to escape Sebek also is hilarious but unfortunately, he's not brave enough to challenge Vil's authority- and Epel finally has a reason to be grateful about being in Pomefiore 💀

Idia saying he regrets being a dorm head is also extremely funny because i just KNOW he’s thinking “dude I would’ve never been the party leader if i’d have to team with these annoying noobs..”

Leona cheering on the little girl and mocking Malleus cause he knows DAMN well Malleus can't actually hurt her is also hilarious-

Malleus is also petty enough for Leona to be WRONG about this, but atleast he got some sense knocked into him before the poor girl got blasted into smithereens- Malleus was actually gonna magic blast her into oblivion like 💀💀

(side note: leona looks SO handsome when he's actually laughing with a big smile, it's so unfortunate that we don't see this sprite often..)

Malleus and Leona getting along in order to gang up on Trey is lowkey CRAZY cause what is Trey gonna do to them 💀 mf was about to be bodied if he hadn't run off to talk with Shock in order avoid them-

(legitimately will never understand why they decided Trey was an enemy for trying to mediate their arguements by agreeing with both of them- dude is trying his best and yall dont stfu with your gay ass arguments like i would be tired of that shit too 😭)

[umeoniii]

aot men beige flags

eren, jean, reiner , levi , armin , connie

!: sfw

（＾∇＾）

eren:

☆ makes weird voices.

high pitched, low pitched, shaky he doesn’t care.

like sometimes as a bit he just uses weird accents and stuff.

he’ll speak like a caveman for one day.

“me want ooga burga” he’ll scratch his head like one too

and you’ll just stare at him like, “this mfs crazy” bcs literally wtf is he on about?!

the next day he’s trying to sound french

“oui oui mon amour”

and he’s wiggling his brows and has his imaginary mustache in between his fingers.

☆ his next one is he’s kind of oblivious to a lot of things.

you can pull out the ugliest outfit known to man to test him and he’ll say “that looks so good baby”

not bcs he’s setting u up. no, because he doesn’t think that lime green ripped jeans and a orange cropped hoodie look bad together.

you’ll have to show him what fashion looks like and he’ll get better as time goes on.

jean:

the tickle monster.

☆ when you’re around him u have to watch your back. he’s serious about it.

u can have a super cute sentimental moment with him and he’ll pull it out.

“i really love you baby.” you’d say

“who else do you love, because i know you’re cheating on me with him.”

and you’re like WHAT.

“with who?!”

he’d pause and stare at you for a few seconds.

“THE TICKLE MONSTER!”

and he’d tickle you until you can’t breathe and almost pee yourself.

and after that you don’t trust him but then proceed to slip up multiple times.

u guys are gonna hate me for this next one…

☆ he does “the face” when he’s gonna kiss u

u guys know what i’m talking about

“the face guys make when they go in for a kiss”

his isn’t horrid, only because he’s attractive

sometimes he actually over exaggerates it to piss you off.

it’s not super horrible but it’s giggle worthy

reiner:

☆ he’s a cringe bf. unironically. it’s sweet but not all the time.

by cringe i mean “i just found out about periods, god it must suck to be a beautiful goddess :/.”

or he’s like

“hey! tell you’re period it can’t hurt you like that, it’s not cool!”

☆ he’s also a scaredy-cat.

behind all that muscle is a big baby.

he jumps at scary movies even when he knows what happens next.

cannot play something like fnaf with him

he will throw the phone and scream like he got stabbed in his chest.

he’s probably still scared of the dark but it’s kind of sweet idk. he literally cuddles with you at night like a mother and her baby. you’re practically holding him like a frail little princess, except he’s kind of the exact opposite.

this is actually kind of cute though..

levi:

☆ now his beige flag is that he can be SUPER sarcastic. ik he is.

he’s super snarky and sassy.

like he’s the type to tell what’s considered a ‘corny dad joke’ but instead he’d say it with a stoic face.

like if youre talking and couldn’t remember and say something like “remember when umm…” and you just sit there and think, he’d come back with “no i don’t remember when that happened”.

he wouldn’t laugh or anything.

i feel like that’s why it’s funny. he could make a childish poop or fart joke and it would only be funny bcs he looks like this 😐

he would own a stupid t-shirt that says something like, “find your patience before i lose mine”.

☆ he’s a karen as well. he’s not super bad but like at restaurants and stuff when his foods not right or the tables are not bussed…

i’d be in the bathroom crying my mascara off if i was his waitress

armin:

☆ he’s scared of animals.

this includes typical house pets like dogs or cats.

it’s bcs “they don’t speak , so you’ll never know what they’ll do next.”

his fear stems from one small thing that happened when he was younger.

a cat jumped onto his lap.

he thought it was trying to attack him and so he screamed and the cat got scared.

that’s it.

he can’t even visit the zoo because he’s scared the animals will break out. (he’s super serious about it, it’s not even something he jokes about)

he’s tried to like animals and it worked for a while.

until the dog started to play a little too much to his liking.

☆ also he just randomly informs you of random facts.

completely random.

you could be on the toilet and he’ll come in the bathroom like, “a shrimps heart is in its head…”

no “did you know?” or “isn’t it cool that?” he just says it.

if you ever go onto a game show you’ll probably win it with all the useless knowledge he’s given u.

connie:

☆ you could tell him the most god awful thing happened to you and he’ll be like

“wait, this reminds me of something that happened in something i just watched.”

he’ll proceed to whip out his phone and show you the tv show, news report, tiktok. whatever it was he saw.

this tends to happen to every experience that you have.

you could be held hostage and they’ll call him for ransom and somehow it reminds him of this one part of a tv show.

sometimes it’s funny sometimes it’s not.

☆ he sleeps like he hasn’t slept since the day he was born.

he hops into the bed and sits there for 1 minute before he starts snoring aggressively.

he looks dead, like actually…

sprawled out and snoring with his mouth open.

one time he slept with his eyes wide open and you shook him awake panicking.

he belittled you and was all smart and cocky saying “i would never sleep with my eyes wide open” even though he did.

he sleeps to the rain sounds with the thunder. but sometimes is so sleepy and forgets about it.

tagz!🐬: @hangesgirlypop , @yiugen , @heartshapedtearss

♡

a/n: heyooo! b4 u guys request it, im doing girls next ;). i just think this trend is the cutest thing ever, plus it feels good to write fluff. also im actually getting back to requests. like frl this time, i’ve been grinding non stop all night so i could be done by hopefully friday. feel free to request cute things u guys, i will absolutely write it! and also feel free to request other characters, i feel like u guys don’t request them bcs u guys don’t see them and so u think i won’t do them. trust i probs will!

[otomestatus]

Hello hi.

Any headcanons with Hakkai that has a tall gf (as tall as him)?

And he's also hidding his relationship from the gang because he doesn't want her to get involded with all that, but Takashi finds out and spills tea.

hello!! this was actually such a cute request i got really excited when i read it and immediately started brain storming LMFAO i wrote a lot more than??? i anticipated???

you gotta be in this for the LONG HAUL because we all know how nervous hakkai gets around girls. yuzuha is definitely the wingman in this situation at first without intentionally trying to be

i personally think hakkai would have a thing for tall girls and that isn’t to say he wouldn’t date someone who is short because what matters the most to him is that you both love each other and support each other, but i can definitely see the fact you’re tall being a bonus to him. and he especially loves that you’re the same height as him.

you wanna wear heels? don’t matter to him because he wants you feeling happy and confident.

if you’re someone who is insecure in your height, he likes to encourage you to do things you normally wouldn’t because of your height even though you’ve always wanted to.

you might be the same height as him, but his clothes still fit a little big on you too.

he’s always telling you that you could model and he’s surprised you haven’t tried to and he admits MAYBEEEE he’s a little bias but you’re also just so gorgeous. a total package

the only person who really knows about you two is yuzuha and it’s because it would be next to impossible keeping something like a girlfriend a secret from her, but she respects that hakkai doesn’t want anyone in toman to know. she’s incredibly amused that he isn’t even telling takashi even though it seemed like that would be the first thing he would’ve done

he makes time for you as much as he can because you make him smile like no other and there’s relief to be found in your presence

you honestly didn’t think twice about keeping your relationship extremely private because he’s always so attentive. he makes mistakes along the way and sometimes there are moments where you feel a little weird and insecure, but he tries his absolute best.

it’s definitely not going to be a forever thing either. keeping your relationship a secret is just temporary. he wants to know there is no chance you’ll end up getting hurt because of what he does with toman.

there were a few instances where you two were out on a date and had to hide really quickly because he spotted someone from toman. it always felt really silly and funny and there was a sort of thrill to sneaking around like that like you were playing hide and seek.

luckily you never have to worry about girls flirting with him when he’s with his friends because he’s just not gonna talk to them or look at them. or probably even breathe near them because they make him anxious.

he talks a lot about his toman friends to you though so you learn about them through osmosis. especially about takashi and takemichi. sometimes when you’re out with your friends or alone shopping you’ll recognize one of the major members he spoke about, but it’s not often. it is a little funny that you know them and they have no idea who you are. you feel like some sort of undercover agent.

HOWEVER, your relationship cannot escape takashi for long. you both had a good run for awhile there, but something is off. something is just not quite right and takashi cannot put his mf finger on it.

it all starts when he comes over to drop something off that hakkai forgot at his house the other night. only supposed to be a short little errand and yuzuha lets him because this is the most normal thing in the world. he attempted to meet up with hakkai first but he was being very adamant about not meeting him and just having yuzuha grab it for him. that was the first alarm bell.

what takashi didn’t need to know was that you both had planned out a date that day and would be out most of the day.

takashi asks yuzuha why hakkai was being weird and even showed her the messages, but yuzuha ain’t spilling shit. she keeps it casual. she’s telling him hakkai is always weird. so takashi hits her with the “where is he” and she’s trying not to sweat. what the fuck does she say… girl is maintaining eye contact, she’s not snitching, but she’s gotta come up with smth QUICK

“bowling.” yeah that sounds about right

takashi accepts this answer, but he knows something isn’t right. however…ain’t his business right?

that is until he steps into hakkai’s room to drop the item on his bed and LEAVE ( he does not leave ). there’s something in hakkai’s room that just…confirms his suspicion that something IS suspicious

there’s an earring on the floor. AN EARRING. it could be yuzuha’s, but why would it be? something is telling him it’s not

next time he sees hakkai he’s trying to see if he can subtly get some information out of him. he’s asking where he was the other day and blah blah blah. doesn’t mention the earring. hakkai seems to have his alibi all planned out though because he’s answering these questions easily. he was not gonna let takashi catch him slipping

he offhandedly mentions the earring to draken and draken isn’t entirely convinced it could belong to anyone BUT yuzuha because they’ve all seen how he acts with girls. draken jokes pigs would fly before hakkai manages to get a girlfriend. takashi isn’t convinced though. the math ain’t mathin.

however he gets a break in the case when he’s out grocery shopping. you, unfortunately, also happen to be there because you’re picking out snacks for the at home movie night date you planned with hakkai that evening. you’re both in the same aisle and out of the corner of his eye he notices something familiar. it’s the mf earring.

now this isn’t damning evidence by any means. lots of girls probably have the same pair, but the coincidence has him shook.

you, on the other hand, had recognized him IMMEDIATELY and you’re currently sweating your ass off right now because you have to act casual but this is takeshi mitsuya. this is the guy your boyfriend talks about who also doesn’t know about you just yet. you just wanted to have a peaceful and quick shopping trip but his presence is just so overwhelming

takashi takes this moment to compliment your earrings. you hesitate even answering, in fact, you stumble of your words a little trying to get out that thank you. and just so you don’t seem weird or awkward you add in the little fact that you had thought you lost one of them last week until your boyfriend returned it.

now THAT feels like damning evidence, but not quite. there’s nothing totally concrete, but he is feeling 100% confident that his suspicions are correct because thats too much of a coincidence. hakkai shinba has a mf girlfriend and he’s going to confirm this one way or another.

he’s sharing all this with draken (who doesn’t believe him) and mikey (who doesn’t know what’s going on) and he knows this sounds like a conspiracy theory BUT GUYS— HEY GUYS HEAR HIM OUT

meanwhile you and hakkai are blissfully unaware of all this happening. you do tell him about running into takashi at the grocery store and hakkai just kinda laughs about it. you both joke about how takashi ran into you, his girlfriend, and just had no idea about it. was completely clueless.

i know you’re all wondering when does takashi finally figure it out… and it‘s pretty anticlimactic. he spots you two before you even have the chance to spot him. you’re both at a cafe just chillin and takashi is walking by with his sisters and everything finally starts to fucking click. he’s getting the full picture.

actually he is quick to take a quick picture and send it to draken and gloat about how he was actually right all this time.

next toman captains meeting is intense. hakkai has no clue that just about all of them know about you now. he’s walking in blissfully unaware. takashi had spent a lot of time filling the guys in about how hakkai has a girlfriend and she’s as tall as him and really pretty ( these are boys we know that was a question that was asked ). honestly they were all shocked to find out he managed to get a girlfriend because he malfunctions when a girl even breathes near him.

mikey does not hesitate bringing it up. they’re all tryna be sneaky about it and make him nervous, but mikey is straight up like, “so, how’s your girlfriend!”

that’s when hakkai’s blood runs fucking cold. they’re all staring at him smirking and shit and he’s like oh fuck they know

regardless they are all impressed and congratulate him on finding someone because they didn’t think he had it in him.

[okaerina]

...bf!ricky 🐾

warnings! : kinda bad first work typa post but i might've went overboard with the loml 🤗

bf!ricky is down bad for your affection. he is a bit awkward at initiating affection first but when you take matters in your hand and allow him to just bask in your warmth he is DEAD. he is squealing like a high school girl inside but tries to calm his rigid breathe and insane bpm.

bf!ricky is gonna spoil you rotten! expect lots of anonymous gifts and fancy outings from him (cuz he's young and rich)

"ricky i told you no more gifts without my asking didn’t i ?" you said in a slightly scolding manner as you open the lavish looking tiny box just to get blinded by the shine of a tiny yet gorgeous ring. ricky just shrugs and gives you a cute smile that has your hurt melting.

bf!ricky loves everything you do means EVERY SINGLE THING. it can be the most normal task like combing your hair infront him and he's swooning over you in no time but when you do something for him? he swears he's suffering from never ending cardiac issues but he isn’t complaining though 🤭.

bf!ricky gives you insane lover privileges. his double standard for you is so noticeable it has his friends crying how soft he gets when it's you. every mf can see how his gaze softens or how his face lits up just by the thought of you my boys ready to jump of a cliff for u fr. one fine dat ricky invited you to his practice in yuehua so he could show off his skills duh and when ollie just randomly comes up and says how hungry he is and begs ricky to give him a payback treat but he just keeps on pouring his attention all over you and proceeds to ignore ollie 😭😭😭.

bf!ricky will be pretty possessive towards you imo. how is he not supposed to get irritated when some random pest won’t stop gawking at what belongs to him aka you and disturbing his love life. one glare and those mfs are off to hell 😌💅. It's all fun and games till he gets mad for good oh boy.

uneasyness immediately took over your senses as soon as that barista in the cafe that ricky took you out wouldn’t stop staring at you and being the amazing boyfriend ricky is immediately starts to come for your aid not until that bastard just smirks at you with that nasty look when he shoots him a glare and the next thing you see is your boyfriend throwing the barista away like a trash bag after whispering smtg that has the man crawling away in terror "pathetic", ricky tsks clearly pissed but don’t worry he'll make it up to you ;)

bf!ricky who's literary the sweetest person in the entire universe he loves you sm he'll trade of everything just for you hell he'd sell his soul and do anything just for you so make sure to give him the love he deserves bcz you’re his lil happy pill his world his cutiepatootie <333

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[impala-67-zeppelin]

so who’s gonna write the fic where jayce and viktor survive the wild rune explosion but for the first 3/4 months only jayce returned bc essentially the arcane hates him and he isn’t compatible with it to the extent that viktor is (and basically the arcane is like rebuilding viktors body so they can send him back as well) but in the most dean winchester way possible, jayce’s brain convinces him that it was his fault viktor didnt “survive” bc he let go of him and honestly the mf tears himself up about it bc he basically killed his bff/partner/lover again. but what really happened was that the arcane separated them so it could heal and punish viktor AND viktor chooses to stay, similar to the deancas purgatory arc when dean starts to hallucinate cas everywhere and feels like he failed him again only for cas to come back and show him how wrong he is. [edit]bc cas/viktor chose to condemn/punish themselves for their actions against humanity but mainly how they hurt dean/jayce while losing themselves to power (leviathan!cas and the machine herald). so, they let go and push dean/jayce away. and similarly to dean, the reason jayce convinced himself otherwise was bc dealing with that guilt was easier than facing the fact that viktor chose to leave him. again.

also made this post off no sleep so i had to come back to revise and add more!

[crybabycinna]

I saw a post on Twitter and it was like character that isn’t canonically gay but you can’t fathom the thought of them dating the opposite gender and they person retweeted it and like used pics of Lin when she’s sitting with her legs open and they were like Tenzin who? And i screamed cause idc that woman is gay! Do you see how she sit with her legs wide open! THAT MF GAY! Only gay bitches sit with their legs open! Like almost all my friends are gay and we sit with our legs open so there for it’s a proven fact only gay bitches sit with they legs open so there for LIN IS GAY! I want Lin so bad like omg! She’s so hot! Like fuck! Put me through the mattress! (I’m just talking shit for the love of badger moles don’t take what I’m saying seriously because I know someone is gonna get overly butt hurt over this 🤣

[givehimthemedicine]

i read the Lumax analysis and ngl i feel the same about Byler. why is Will practically doing all the work. Mike just ignores him, then Will speaks up, gets shut down. no apology to his face. then Mike has the gall to pull the "b-but you won’t abandon me, right 🥺?" card seconds before they move to Cali and Will eats it up.

Mike was scribbling his next letter to send to El, while Will was making a painting as a gift for him. when they reunite at the airport, Will is so giddy, and happy even when he spots Mike wearing the Minion suit. he is going in for a hug, fully expecting he’ll get one. despite the lack of phone calls he believes that Mike is gonna match his energy. he doesn’t. he is ignored. again. when Mike realizes he is losing him he swoops in to apologize. what do we get for rest of season? it’s just Will comforting, reassuring Mike and listening to his problems. he notices Mike being upset as they are burying the corpse and talks to him, he notices Mike moping as he reads El’s letter, etc. then the grand culmination - van scene.

i give Mike a pass for not noticing Will sobbing as hes muffling his cries with his hand and turned around. but what about before? when he was giving the van speech at times Will looked and sounded like he was 2 seconds away from bursting into tears. how did Mike not notice something was wrong when he was obviously paying attention to him. and if he did that’s even worse.

Jonathan being there isn’t an excuse. he could have said something, anything, subtly to check up on him or comfort him. he didn’t do that. "you make her feel like she’s not a mistake at all. like she’s better for being different" ok so why are the Duffers so allergic to showing us that. when was the last time that happened. season 2? when Mike said it’s not his fault Will doesn’t like girls, that they are not kids anymore, him wanting to play DnD, which led to Will having a breakdown and destroying Castle Byers, his safe place and cry as he ripped up their photos and called himself stupid - was he feeling better for being different? or worse? did he feel uplifted by Mike shoving in his face how normal he is unlike Will? that he’ll never be like them? that they are moving on, being grown ups and Will is stuck? could some bully at school outright calling him a slur be as hurtful as the things his best friend, someone he trusted and loved said to him then? that he never received a proper apology for.

Mike gets free therapy sessions. Will gets a few crumbs of attention and affection when Mike gets forcibly separated from El.

Mike and Will aren't characters I pay particular attention to, so the townsfolk will please forgive my newborn take.

I absolutely see your point and agree Mike has had terrible PR with Will on many occasions. but while he's often an asshat when it comes to Will's feelings, I'll say at least Mike is regularly shown to be concerned for Will's welfare in the life-and-death-plot way, and is actively involved in making plans and taking actions that save him. (Mike's the one to rally the party to go out and search for Will. to insist he's alive somehow after they all saw his dead body. to build "hey let's make sure we don't also kill Will" into the MF-killing plans. etc)

that's where I think a comparison to lumax isn't so tight because I can't think of anything Max has ever done for Lucas's welfare on either a plot or feelings level. (the writing has never really given her an occasion to save or help Lucas the way he is for her.)

and for all his shit, we have also seen Mike be really good to Will on the feelings level (mostly thinking about his incredible loyalty in season 2 and the swings speech. his commitment to Will in the front half of the show is on par with that of Joyce and that's saying something). it sure would be nicer if that was more recent/consistent, but it has happened, which I can't honestly say for Max. the nicest thing Max has done for Lucas so far is allow him to be nice to her.

[tang3r1n]

here’s my list of anime dudes and chicks who’d fuck with eating ass and why;

(tw, i allude to dark subjects at some points, please be cautious and keep yourself and your mind safe <3)

animes; one piece, jjk, mha, aot

sanji— he’d be weird abt it, too loud, too wet, too gross abt it, idk man he’d be NEEEAAASSSTY.

zoro— not weird but he’d be like…so in love with your ass. like you gotta beg him to touch your clit cause he’s so focused on ur booty

law— hrrngh. hnnngfh- mmmmph.. love him. anyways, another one obsessed with ass but he’d be that sleaze who licks from your clit to asshole. like he edges you by just licking long stripes from one hole to the other reeeaalll slow. fingerbangs you like a MOTHER FUCKER while eating ur ass tho, like the kinda fast that looks like it hurts but feels fucking fantastic

luffy— obviously. no duh. no shit. he’s feral with it, but like law he switches between pussy and ass.. okay wait nvm he leans towards ur ass more imo, more stuff to actually ingest ig

doffy— he doesn’t wanna admit that he’s so fucking into ass, like the sight of a lil booty hole and he’s rock fucking hard, so he makes it a humiliation thing. like he’s making you feel pathetic and horrible for cumming from your ass like his dick isn’t sore as fuck and he’s cumming dry.

i really wanna say shanks. i really wanna fucking say shanks…. i’m saying shanks. he’d be lazy abt it tho, mainly eats you out to get your ready for his dick ngl, more of an ass fucker than an ass eater.

KIDD. KIDD. ON GOD. he’d be like doffy except he’s open abt LOVING ass AND humiliating you. he’s so fucking mean and on his knees slurping and sucking and fucking. deco loves biting your ass so hard you bleed. he’d fuck dry. yes he would.

hrrngk- nami<3– yall i have a PHAT crush on nami.. obsessed with her being obsessed over her bestie. anyways. FUCK. GOD. she’ll never fucking tell you abt it, never ever, but you can always feel her thumbs twitching near your lil pucker when she goes down on you, BIIIGGG into spanking tho. bitch leaves marks through jeans.

gojo— it’s gojo satoru, of course he’s into ass. he is THE man. THE MAN. he’s gonna eat ass, he’s gonna eat pussy, he’s gonna cum in ur mouth and make out, he’s gonna cum in your holes and eat it out. nasty mf with nasty desires.

g-..hm..yeah geto— he’d also be a humiliator. he doesn’t REALLY like ass all that much, doesn’t mind it, BUT.. it upsets you, makes you all teary and squirmy and he DOES like that. spanks so hard you welt <3

sukuna— fuck off you know why. i-i don’t have to say anything, ITS SUKUNA

mommy— I MEAN SHOKO— big bad mommy dom who makes you eat her ass then shoved all kinds of shit in your holes <3 loves doctor play and ‘taking your temp’ the old fashioned way <3 (god spit on me…)

aizawa— UUUUGGGHHHH :( i feel like he’s one of those men who loves fucking ass more than pussy, yknow? he’ll shove a vibe up there, turn it on full blast, and make you sit on his face while he eats you out and fingers ur pussy <3 a true gentleman who cums hands free when you squirt on his face and squeal then draws you a bath <33

fat gum— too easy. too fucking easy, gang he’s another everything man, loves it all.

ende-hm. en. hm. lemme sit on it for a second.

HOLY SHIT DABI— oh such an ass fucker, such an ass eater. he likes it for the taboo, naughty, gross aspect of it. the more you hate it the more he adores it. OH LORD he’d burn lil hearts on your ass so you couldn’t sit, make you lay face down and naked so he can eat your ass out while you’re ‘healing’ (he’s gonna do it again when they’ve scarred over.)

MIDNIGHT.— shes an either-or. she’ll let you choose which she eats out but both holes WILL be stuffed.

miruko— ofc dude. like. ofc. she’s got this carrot dildo you see, BABE JUST HEAR HER OUT PLEASE JUST LISTE—

eren mf yeager, BOTH yeager brothers— zeke is just an ass man, nothing really weird, just loves bootyhole. EREN NOW. eren’s like sanji. like literally so fucking loud and so fucking annoying and so fucking GROSS. there spit and lube everywhere, he’s drenched, whined and cries when you don’t let him fuck ur ass

jean(?)— also cried when you don’t let him go through the backdoor:( he’s such a crybaby, fucking your pussy so hard you can’t breathe while his thumbs are both hooked in your ass, i bet that’d feel weird as fuck cause he uses them to pull you back in.

hange— another obvious gross one. they’d be..so hot with it. god. i love team ‘girlcock hange’ btdubs. they’re the kind to finger you while DEMOLISHING your ass, spitting on ur pussy and rubbing your clit to tight and fast you’re dizzy all while they try and dig their dick deep enough to punch your gut.

GOD I WANNA SAY FUCKING REINER BUT I DONT THINK HES REALLY INTO IT :(

yknow who is??

endeavor, i decided he’d be an ass fucker. ooohh yeeeaaahhh… he’s not weird abt it, but the SSSSECOND you say you wanna get your ass ate he’s tossing you on the bed and ripping off your pants. a snogger, shoves his face ALL up in there <3 another one who SPANKS AND SLAPS AND SPITS AND BITES. he’d be like hange, fucking the shit out of your ass with his.. yknow those like, big logs of ground beef you can buy at stores? enji, anyways, and he’s finger blasting ur cunt with two fingers cause they’re big enough that if he fisted you he’d prolly fucking kill you.

k done. can you tell i’ve discovered a new kink guys?????

I HIT THE TAG LIMIT LMFAO

[qprpbj]

okay okay clearly paul is acting out and reacting to being over darry but jumping and attacking other socs, but wut do u think darry thinks when he hears about the socs jumping johnny and then in the musical burning two-bit and pony!!, and darrel knows paul is one of them doing it?

if i’m gonna be so fr i kinda have severe beef with the way the musical has paul jump pony and two bit and shit 😭 like i know it’s just to give him a bigger part and bc randy isn’t in the musical and whatever but also. idk all that insinuates bro is still in high school?? like why’d we need to make that change esp bc they emphasize darry and paul’s friendship at the rumble 💀 like now my guy just looks like a mf weirdo being like 17/18 hanging out with a 14/15 year old sleeping over at his house LOL

anyway he’s still 20 in my head idc about canon it can’t hurt me if i don’t let it! i think darry is obviously pissed esp on pony’s behalf but probably frankly not terribly surprised bc paul’s a has been loser hanging out with high schoolers still. just makes him gear up worse for the rumble 🫡

[crazylittlejester]

i hope this isn’t weird to say, but can i hear you yap about your fiancée? like the little things you love about them? (you don’t have to if neither of you are comfortable with it! ignore this ask if it makes you uncomfortable)

aldkfkdk dw it’s okay!

for starters, no other mother fucker would say shit like this to me and then ACTUALLY give me an explanation:

fr tho, she’s not just my fiancee she’s my best friend and i love her so so much. if no one’s got my back, i know she does, and i have hers. If i need to yap about something, I know she’ll listen and hype me up, and i absolutely do the same for her. She’s truly one of the kindest, most caring people I’ve ever met in my entire life, and I genuinely get very very sad when she goes out of state for college because i miss her 😭

I can text her about a problem or something I’m upset about and she’ll respond with “NTA, divorce” and it’s genuinely the FUNNIEST fucking thing

We have this thing that she’s not allowed to speak while I’m drinking something or have food in my mouth because she chooses the absolute worst moments to say the funniest things and having water come out your nose HURTS, and a few months ago we were getting coffee and she waited until I took a nice big sip before showing me the stupidest tiktok I’ve ever seen and everyone in the coffee shop had to watch me fight for my fucking life. And yes it is a bit annoying to choke and die every time i eat or drink around her, but I do genuinely love the way this mf looks at me like :3 before showing me a meme. istg she does it on purpose /j

every time we play bg3 together she fucking sits there and waits for me to think she wont do it, and then shoves my fucking character or hits them with a sword and then RUNS AWAY AND I CAN NEVER GET HER BACK BECAUSE SHES TOO FAST 😭

she’s also the one who OFFICIALLY got me into Zelda, so without her I probably wouldn’t have gotten into LU. I’d played the og LOZ before when I was 12, but when we were 18 the two of us when to target and she was like “hey man this seems like something you’d like” and had me play the BOTW demo and now I’m here. She gave me the final push and I’ve been yappin’ here ever since. And I think it’s funny that it was my constant yapping that was the final push for HER to get into HER current hyperfixation, bg3. we cursed each other /j

i also love that i’ll go check to see if she got home okay (because i have her location) or im just curious to see what she’s doing, and then I’ll find her in the middle of a fucking lake out of the goddamn country. It never fails to make me laugh 😭

but yeah she’s great, she’s awesome, she’s the funniest person alive, i love her, she’s my best friend, we’re gonna hang a framed photo of autism creature on our wall once we’re able to get an apartment. and there’s no one else who will continue to say “GO PISS GURL!!!” with me in 2024 🫶

[spaceagebachelormann]

Platonic hcs for Adam Frankenstein and a gender neutral reader that befriends him? hope you’re having a great day btw!

platonic adam frankenstein hcs !

✧ warnings: some swearing

✧ additional info: oh my god i got so excited when i saw this request by all means pls send more for my classic monsters m.list and/or phantom of the opera (if you’ve seen it ofc) this made me so happy ur an angel. also can be read as either the book or movie versions <3

✧ m.list — nav.

so like

he’d probably be intimidated when u first come across him

like he doesn’t trust you but he isn’t going to hurt you because he doesn’t have a reason

you probably need to show him ur not gonna do anything before he stops trying to get away from u

and when that happens he’ll still be a bit suspicious

just start by introducing urself and explaining ur intentions and he’ll calm down

he finally introduces himself to u as gently as he can cause he doesn’t wanna like. scare u away ofc

once he gets comfortable he’s such a good friend

one of the first things he does is ask u abt ur life cause he feels like it’s important to know what ur friends lives are like (he’s right go check up on ur friends rn if ur reading this 😒)

he knows he can’t like stay with u (probably) and u can’t stay with him so he gets kinda sad when u leave

goodbye hugs absolutely happen!!

and he’s super gentle cause he’s really strong and could easily crush u

also def gives head pats

erm anyway

typa guy to walk into ur house like he lives there (if u live alone)

but if he doesn’t i feel like you would be going to wherever tf he is more than him coming to u

and he gets so happy if u just show up unexpectedly

like that shit makes him more happy than showing up on scheduled time

and if ur ever late cause u had a problem for someone else oh my god

a) u came to the right person because he’s very sweet and understanding and will listen to u and give input if u ask

b) he’ll stomp that mf like a bug if u want him too

c) his hugs are fucking amazing

he’s so good at comforting <3

other than that he’d probably know how to cook from living alone so he’d like making u food

even if u don’t ask he has something ready for u

and you WILL eat it or i’m gonna come after u 😒

would also randomly bring u gifts as a thank you for befriending him because now he isn’t as lonely and has someone to talk to! <3

the thought of him like getting all happy when u come through the door to see him is making me so happy and sad at the same time he’s such a cutie patootie

this one might take some time. but once he’s rlly rlly comfortable he’ll prob tell u abt what happened with victor

was mainly afraid of telling u cause he wasn’t sure how u would react

has so much more respect for u when u aren’t rude to him abt it <3

if u have any random drama bro is invested

“SHE DID WHAT” core

will think ur in the right literally no matter what

u could’ve done some shit scandalous and he’s defending u

u could probably help him come outside more cause he’d always be inside

just say to him “hey we should go for a walk!!” and with a bit of convincing ur suddenly outside in the woods on a walk

THE ANIMALS LOVE HIM SO MUCH

like it’s so cute he’s sitting on the ground trying to pay attention to 15 animals at once

even if he’s deformed they know hes rlly sweet and wouldn’t do anything to them

also he’d fucking love picnics

like just sitting there and listening to u talk abt whatever

he loves it <3

[queenofallimagines]

Hiya, I just read your Lucifer with a devotee ask and I was wondering if you could do the same with Leviathan or Diavolo from Obey Me?

Absolutely beloved! I am not sure how TF I didn’t see this?? (Writing really long Fics is actually so much work)

Leviathan:

- shook

- Literally at a loss

-Thinks you’re joking

- He will notice you, but def won’t notice that YOU are his Henry

- Probably will be like “you’re def not as good at them”

- And gushes about his Henry, and you’re just like 🤨📸

- All the brothers are surprised you follow him and look out for him so easily

- During the TSL arc the only time you’ve ever feared him was then

- after that you flat out don’t talk to him

- Avoid him

- He feels bad but not really bc “why would he feel bad about hurting a normie’s feelings”

- Your pact mark glows then too because I think if you were his devotee he would give you a pact easily after working with you for a while

- Levi was too upset to notice the searing pain in his chest when he attacked you

- Or how cold he felt right after

- Mammon nursing your sprained wrist, and you’re barely listening to him

- Well end up making you spill the beans, and he is FLOORED that you have a pact w Levi bc uh hello?? He’s your FIRST MAN??

- He will keep this a secret but the way more protective of you

- The house is low-key really awkward because of y'all too

- mammon giving Levi the stink eye

- Levi upset he’s feeling so many hurt feelings because he still don’t get y'all two are connected

- Gets REALLY depressed when his most beloved Henry isn’t picking up

- Like he can’t even feel your presence??

- Will barge into your room back in the human realm and move all the shit in your alter around wondering WTF is going on

- Maybe you’re at work or something, weird he didn’t know but okay

- Tries three more times, and you’re not there

- Worried something happened to you

- Gets super upset and Lucifer is like bro wtf is you sniffling for??

- dinner is wild bc when is the HOL not like a soap opera 😭

- Asmo is like the human you made a pact with??

- Asking Lucifer to check and see if your dead because he can only mildly feel your presence, but you’re not talking to him

- Mammon is uncharacteristically quiet

- He’s side eyeing the light blue mark glowing under the table (I HC that his would be in a place that’s always covered like right below your hipbone or like lower back and not more visible the other brothers marks)

- And then looking at you like “are you good?”

- Levi still babbling on about his Henry, and he’s upset they aren’t here

- Mammon is your protector, and he’s gonna stand on business about you EVERY time

- Also he can’t help not saying some slick shit 💀

- “Maybe if ya didn’t try to kill them your ‘precious’ Henry would want to talk to you

- Levi windows blue screen resetting Rn

- Satan messy bitch number 2 just hums and is like “I had my suspicions, but I wasn’t completely sure you were one of his followers”

- Asmo is gushing about how cute this is

- And ofc Levi is too awkward and anxious to even look you in the eye

- Dinner is still awkward but goes by smoother than before

- You go to your room to mind your business as you do, and you hear this timid ass knock on the door

- Like nobody in this house knocks that MF soft Levi IK it’s you

- Shuffles into your room w his head down and starts fumbling over his worlds

-“ you could have told me it was you…”

- “Didn’t think I had to. I never thought you would hurt me….”

- Shaking in his boots as he rambles out an apology and starts spiraling honestly

- You can barely hear him talking low as hell

- “Gah! And then I was bragging to you about YOU… How embarrassing!”

- You let him know you forgive him by teasing him

- “…….so….your so-called Henry was your most favorite?”

- He’s literally fighting for his life MC, please spare him

- Will act like hot shit lmao

- Monopolizing all your time too, like the other 6 bothers are exhausted

- Can’t even work towards getting belphie out of the attic because he’s always taking up your time

- “Sorry I’m borrowing them because we’re going top secret ritual stuff”

- “You are literally just going to play the new Ruri-Chan game”

- “OKAY AND???”

- Asmo sitting back and watching the chaos bc he knows y'all getting down and nasty on the regular

- “Someone go tell them to relax I can hear thumping because they’ve been gaming all morning”

- And he’s blowing your back out and realigning your chakras

- Like you can only cover up the scratch marks and hickeys with his clothes for so long