#this is gonna be the most wild association of tags but let's go | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

pynkricee · 1 year ago

Text

Permanent Red Stain: Part 3

(WARNING: TAGS: Slutty, Choso smut, bossy choso, sexy choso , 18+, Rough Sex. Unprotected sex, fluff)

KyiGo, is a woman in her 30's, divorced from her ex after 5 years of marriage, leaving her with a two year old daughter to raise. After a year of being single, trying to find self-love and her self-worth again, she finally wanted to step back out into the world and discover something worth wild. From understanding her hatred to understanding the person that it turned her into, she will always try and do what's best for her baby girl. Even if it meant sacrificing her happiness? Even if that may mean stepping into a new love she never imagined? Or breaking the cycle of being afraid to love again....

“So….what would you say to letting me take you out?” -Choso

“So..Did you fuck her yet?”

“No…Gojo..’DAMNIT’! How many times are you going to fucking ask me that?” Satoru Gojo was the type that gave no fucks when it came to sexual emotion. He was pretty swift at personally turning his emotions off when it came to certain women. Probably because he was hurt so much, and most of it was due to the way he looked and how he carried himself. From my understanding and the little things he's said to be, Sato had a habit of keeping his guard up even if he felt like he was in a position to make the best out of a bad relationship. That was just him. He was waiting for the right one.

Gojo, stood 6’2, blonde, blue eyes and he was a sweet soul. He mostly stayed to himself and worked everyday, every week. He was the official type who liked his peace and so did I. That was probably one of the only things that we had in common.

“Until you tell me that you fucked her….” Gojo was my boy and one of the only people that I actually associated myself with. Satoru was a soft man...and he tried to hide it with everything fiber in his being. Coming to the tattoo shop was a way I could tell that he released his steam from his everyday life. Not that I could blame him for it because I used to be in the same position he was in emotionally.

Preparing my ink needles for tomorrow's appointments, I decided to close up shop early tonight for my date I had scheduled with KyiGo. With Gojo being my left hand man, my brother Yuji would come in tonight and clean up a few retouches I had scheduled. Next to Gojo, Yuji was clean and crips with his work, when he wasn't being a smart ass to all the women who came in. I swear at times the women just came in to fuck with us like we were the “New Blood” in the city. This wasn't motherfucking Vampire Diaries let alone Twilight. So if they weren't with their boyfriends on the weekends, all the local women were hanging out at our shop for the night. (If you get it then you get it. It got to the point to where it was fucking annoying.)

Jumping down into my tattoo chair, almost knocking it off its hinges, Gojo was being too nosey for his own good.

“You going to tell me what she looks like or am I gonna have to guess? You know I don't like guessing…”

I sighed sucking in my bottom lip. Just thinking about what she looked like made my dick hard at times and if Gojo noticed my reaction at the slightest mention of her. “I'm not going to tell you, but I can show you.” Unlocking my phone I handed it to him. I noticed his eyes glimmered and he became quiet. His light blue eyes looked my way with his light bangs slightly pulling a shadow over them. (I've never seen him look at me like this before. Ever. Kinda made me wonder if he knew this girl.)

“Does she know you have a picture of her?” He asked, slightly hanging the phone over his fingers.

I sneered the side of my lip up, snatching my phone back from him, sliding it into my back pocket.

“Of course she does. I actually sent it to her.” (A picture of her and her daughter I took for family-fun day.)

“She's beautiful…” He sighed leaning back in the chair. He turned his head lazily towards me with his arms spread out on the arm rest. He let out a small sigh from the corner of his mouth, throwing his leg around the chair. “Don't fuck this up..Cho.” He stood up patting me on the shoulder and walked over to his station.

My throat all of a sudden became dry, as at the drywall in front of me.

I hope I don't fuck this up….

Yes. He finally had the balls to ask me out because lord knows I didn't have the courage right now. And of course, I said yes…

For the next week whenever I picked my daughter up from school, Choso and I were always caught having a conversation.

Whether if it was about the smallest things, even if it was him complimenting me on any changes I made to my appearance. I could have changed my earrings and he would tell me how pretty they were or how they complimented my skin tone. I noticed my body language started to get more relaxed around him as well. I wasn't as tense as I was from the first time I met him.

And for him having my number…..

He did call me when it came to my daughter. Luri was really a boy in a little girl's body so she was constantly hurting herself while she was at school. But that wasn't any different than it was then when she was at home. She was tough like any other child, but she had her moments when she would cry for me and he wouldn't hesitate to call me to come to the school if need be.

Now when it comes to my ex husband, I don't talk about him. I don't think about him. I don't dream about him. I hardly breathe around him. The only time I communicate with him is for the sake of my daughter and that was it. Anything else was pretty irrelevant. When it came down to our relationship..it was a toxic one. One that I felt like I was alone the whole time and I was the only one doing the work to make it work. I cried so many times thinking to myself that I was a failure and what I was doing wrong. (When in reality it was mainly all him. And it took me to let him go completely to realize that. ) Dealing with someone who couldn't take accountability and never wanted to talk about our issues, was mentally and emotionally draining.. it was over-stimulating in the worst way possible. I knew I wanted something better for myself. A life better for my daughter. I wanted her to see what it was like for someone to love her mother correctly that way in the back of her mind, she would only accept that love in return within her older years. That's all I wanted for my baby girl when that time came.

Saturday night finally hit after a stressful week. It was 8pm. The stars were so bright tonight. Almost like it was a sign that this was the perfect time for our date. We decided to try something different than what we were used to. A coffee and croissant date. I thought it was the cutest idea when he texted and told me the night before. The plan was to meet up around 9pm at Castain Park downtown. This was an open park with a beautiful water fountain in the middle that stood about 20ft high. It was mainly a place where students from the university came to study during the day but at night, it was a ghost town area.

After dropping off my daughter with my sister that night, I spent a good amount of time getting myself prepared for this date. I didn't tell my sister any details about Choso. Yes my sister Dhay and I were really close. We told each other everything even when I would come down to our sex lives, but I didn't include her in any of this yet. I wanted Choso to be all for me at the moment and me only. I wasn't ready to talk about him or introduce him to my family or even my best friend. I just wasn't ready.

I decided on keeping my look clean and simple for the night. Tight white long sleeve, black wide leg pant, black Dynasty Combats, and my fave black trench. The makeup was simple and sweet like honey. Mascara, a couple beauty moles added to the many I already had. A soft red lip with my fenty beauty gloss boom over it. I straightened the top of my hair so it covered some of my undercut, but not the fresh designs I had got cut in layers for tonight's date. I added a touch of my favorite Billie Ellish number 2 perfume. Not too much, but just enough to where he couldn't get enough. All in all, my prescription glasses finished the look. I was so nervous at this point that I could feel my whole body shaking as I stood in front of this 20ft fountain trying to keep warm plus keeping my damn nerves from being shot and walking off. This was the first date I've been on in a while, so you can understand my frustration.

“Hello beautiful…” I felt a small tap on the back of my shoulder and I Instantaneously calmed down. My breathing became shallow and my heart skipped a beat. I turned around, making eye contact with choso. “ I was hoping to make it here before you did.” He said with a slight smirk. (God this man was so beautiful.) Holding a coffee holder with what smells like two Chai lattes and two cinnamon rolls, this angel came prepared. He stood above me with his hair down today, the sides tagged behind his ears, bangs hanging softly over his eyes. A white leather jacket, with a thick black turtleneck sweater. (But not too thick that I couldn't see his build bulging through it.) Light black jeans that cuffed his ass perfectly, so perfectly I could see his print fighting for its life underneath too. Hell yeah baby….you could cut the sexual tension we had with a knife. He sported a pair of black yeezys but to top off his look with a couple of black metal rings and a pair of simple studs in his ear. I couldn't help but bite my bottom lip when I was standing in attention in his sight. I wasn't going to try to hide it. Neither was he as he licked his lips, blushing as he looked down to the ground. “ Hmmp..” that little sligh sound he always makes out the side of his mouth as he rubbed the edge of his bottom lip with his thumb. (I swear…at this point I could feel my body on fire. The things I felt in this moment, were about to push me on the verge of tears)

(…fucking intrusive thoughts…)

Taking the coffee holder out his hand, we started walking to a nearby bench to have a seat. “You look very handsome Choso.” My face turned red as we finally sat down. I handed him his latte and his cinnamon roll. “Thank you Angel Bean.”

Angel Bean? That was a new one. But it was so cute so I couldn't complain. “So what made you pick Castain Park out of all places?” I asked as I slowly sipped my latte and brought it down from my lips, I could feel some about to drip down my chin, but before I could catch it Choso brushed his finger across my chin catching the access with his thumb, then slowly began rubbing it in his inner lip to taste. His gaze then shot up to me, sultry and low, licking his lips after. My panties were instantly wet. So wet that I knew if I weren't wearing jeans, I'd definitely leave a permanent stain.

He leaned back taking the sight in then sighed. “No one really comes here at night so I thought this would be the perfect place for us to get to know each other better.” He sipped his coffee, spreading his legs open.. his knee touching mine. “So how's Luri?”

“Luri?” He was really asking about my daughter. Wow! (Can you be mine now....?)

“Yes Luri”? He giggled.

“She's fine. She's with my sister right now.”

“She's such a good kid. I really enjoy being around her.”

Those words…. Meant a lot to me. Best believe I didn't take those words lightly, but from him you could tell it was sincere. “Yes she is. She's a mommy's baby. She's my everything ..Cho.” I never really discussed my ex with Kamo. He knew very little details but that was something we both knew from body language to never touch. It was the past and it was going to stay there until it was safe to talk about. He looked at me and smiled and I gave him the warmest smile I could, as I enjoyed every bit of his company.

We spent about another hour at the park walking and talking. At one point he grabbed my pinky wrapping around his. I couldn't help but smile. To be honest.. I haven't felt this in a long time.

The feeling of slight comfort and protection.

She really….makes me feel like a normal person. I can't fuck this up. -(Choso)

“Would you like to come to my house for a little? Get you out of this cold weather and warm you up” He asked, rubbing his hands aggressively up and down my back, pulling me into his chest. God… It felt so good…

“Yes, I'd like that!”

Entering his 2024 Honda Crosstour, the car I actually wanted for myself and baby girl, sat up in 17inch rims, was dressed in all black everything. Dark tinted windows and black leather seats. This was my dream car and it was so sexy, especially on him. Dammit … this… this really couldn't be real, especially when he turned the Bluetooth on to Lloyd Swimming Pools. No.. so not . This couldn't be real, but the puddle that decides to drip into my underwear was. Everything was so seductive and quiet about him and it made me so nervous.

The ride to his house was so tense we could have literally fucked in the car in the fifteen minute drive…

It was about a fifteen minute car ride to his house. I didn't pay attention to where we were nor at that moment did I really care. All my little attention was solely on him. His sexy plump lips, his dark hair he went ahead and tied at the top of his head into a messy bun. The muscles that stiffened out his sweater as he opened the passenger door, taking off his leather jacket, while helping me out. He then took my hand walking me up to his pitch black door. I could literally feel my pussy throbbing between my legs just by standing next to him.

Opening the door to his home he let me in first, following me after locking the door behind him. Flipping on a light switch the first thing I noticed was a large, and expensive, off-black stereo system that stood up against the wall that he connected his phone to. It automatically started playing Neyo Say-it ….

(One of my all time favorite songs! Its almost like this man knew exactly what I liked when I needed it ..)

Out of the corner of my eye I saw him drop his jacket to the floor.

“Kyi. Go…” He softly whispered behind me, placing both of his hands around my waist, gripping me tight. His breathing started to get heavier as his grip got even tighter. So tight I could feel his nails slightly dip into my skin.

As I turned around, looking him in his eyes as my body twisted in his grip. “Cho…so..” I said softly as my eyes met his. His eyes low, full of desire and power for me. The type of power a man has when you know he has you right where he wants you. And that's where he had me…

He aggressively leaned in kissing my lips as I let my lips match the movement of his. The kiss was wet and nasty. Our tongues fighting each other as if they were fighting for their lives. “Choso…” I moaned in his mouth, my face pushed forcefully on top of his. My hands grabbed the back of his nape as the kiss reached a deep passion of aggression. He then threw my hands to the side, taking off my coat and throwing it to the ground as our lips were still locked as we leaned back from each other but our tongue tips still touching. Slowly moving his hands down my hip dips, he gripped his fingers under my ass, lifting me up, walking me through a dark hallway. I felt this intense rage throughout my whole body as he carried me. Lifting my shirt over my head, I threw it on the floor and started to get aggressive as I grabbed the side of his face forcing him to put his back against the wall. My mouth went for the right side of his neck, my tongue engulfing every inch of him, as the taste of him rolled up from his collar bone, right below his ear where I softly bit into him.

“Fuuuuuuuckkk….” He moaned out loud still having a grip on me. With his moan I bit harder which caused him to spin me into the wall. I swear for a split moment he had slightly knocked me out but when I came to, his face was not only just worried in that instant but he didn't want it to stop. I could feel the wall dent in behind me as he used one leg to hold me up and used his other hand to tear my bra completely off. His beautiful low eyes stayed fixed on mine as he then carried me to the bedroom.

“Are.. you okay? I didn't mean to hurt you..” He whispered heavily in my ear as he held me in his grip.

“It's okay..” I whispered back. My voice was shaken with anticipation of what was to come next, as I wrapped my arms around his neck.

Opening the door with one hand he quickly threw me on his bed, taking my underwear off with my pants and shoes. He flipped the light switch on and stood there quietly for a split second, sizing me up while I laid completely naked on his bed.

“You're so fucking beautiful KyiGo and don't ever let anyone ever tell you any different.” I could feel my pussy leaking all over his bed with those words that just came from his lips. My nipples. hard for him. My mouth, watering for him. My mouth needed to taste him and every part of his body needed to feel him. My body was shaking uncontrollably. My pussy throbbed to the point to where it felt like it had a heartbeat of its own.

He began to undress, taking off his sweater and tossing it to the closet door. His body was amazing. Especially the tattoo that tied around his waist. His thick fingers started undoing his belt on his pants, to finally dropping his pants with his underwear to the floor. Stepping out of them he walked up, his dick slapping his inner thighs. His dick was huge and the grith was deliciously thick. My eyes widened with fear at first, but as I calmed down, I felt it was just enough to fill me the way I needed to be filled. I happened to notice he also had a tattoo of a dove right above his waistline. It was so delicate but it was perfect for his stature. I couldn't take my eyes off it as my breathing became heavy, feeling the touch of his cool hands spreading my legs apart.

“Look at me…” He whispered in a soft tone, using one finger to lit my chin up, making full eye contact with him. While using his other hand to take his dick, rubbing it against my sobbing wet clit.

“Yes..Cho..”

“Don't stop looking at me ..”

I nodded. Obeying every command he told me. Gripping the sheets above my head with that one hand, he swiftly interested himself in me with the other.

“Shiiiiiiiit Choso!” I moaned loudly, arching my back as my breast set up straight to his face. In that instant he shot his arm under me thrusting in harder as he groaned steering up the side of his face as he groaned deeply. (God he was so sexy when he made that face.) He moved his grip up my back forcing me to release my arch so now my focus was back on him. My legs arched around his waist pulling him in deeper as my mouth connected back with his. He began to kiss me harder as he hit my spot, moving his throbbing penis in and out of me as my body began to shake with his movements. “You feel so fucking good Choso…”

“ Tell me…” He began to pant, his mouth open as he looked down into my eyes. “ Tell me what you want..” He asked as our bodies continued to rock together, shaking his bed more violently. “Tell me what you want so I can give it to you”

“I want you to fuck me Choso…!” He leaned over licking my top lip. His thrust slowed as he wrapped his arm under my leg, pulling them over his shoulder. We both let out a loud Gasp of pleasure as if felt like he was hitting past my g-spot as he sped up. My hips matching his pace the best way they could. “Please Don't ..fucking stop…” I was cut off by my own cry as he bent down placing his tongue in my mouth. Sweat dripped from his forehead to mine.

“ Fuck baby you feel so good.” He placed his other hand down on my stomach to keep me from moving as my clit quickly rubbed up against him as he used his force to move upward. “ Cum for me baby… I need you to cum.” I could tell he was about to give out at any moment as I felt his body shaking. “Fuuuckkk KyiGo you're so wet for me….” I tried to press his body back with my hand but he wasn't fucking having that. He lowered his face to mine, our noses touching. “ Move your fucking hand..” He said in a sultry, sexy ass voice, that made me feel like I had no choice but to obey him. “Now.. be a good girl..” He started moaning loudly.. “ Cum for me..”

I couldn't hold it any longer. Gripping the sheets with both hands, my eyes began to roll in the back of my head. Biting my bottom lips hard I felt my orgasm finally burst from underneath me all over him. My body began to shake violently as he suddenly grabbed my hips, pressing his fingers deep into my sides. My eyes filled with tears and my lips trembled as my pussy started to leak on his dick that was still throbbing inside of me.

“Choso… baby… Im cumming.." I cried out loud as one of my hands tightly gripped his arms, my nails digging into his skin.

“Fuuuckk Kyi…Shit….” He groaned out loud as his hot cum shot inside of my wet cunt. My pussy was still milking him dry as his body shook above mine.

He finally dropped my legs to the bed, breathing heavily with an accomplished grin on his face. Our bodies began to twitch with one another as he then collapsed onto me, both of us breathing heavily. I wrapped my arms around him, placing a kiss on top of his head.

Shit….

44 notes · View notes

filthyfluffyfantasies · 1 year ago

Text

✧ ˚ 　· 　　 . DL;DR - this fic is not meant for anyone under the age of 18 as it contains the following: unprotected p in v, hickies, use of petnames, sex in a car, and creampie / body fluids. writer does not give permission for her works to be reposted, with or without permission. ✧ ˚ 　· 　　 .

prompt - virginity ft hints of lovemaking

character | fandom - sweetpea | Riverdale

reader | original character - female reader, northsider!good girl reader & non -or vague, description.

words - roughly 1k

tagging - < taglist here >

✧ ˚ 　· 　　 . losing your virginity to Sweetpea in the backseat..✧ ˚ 　· 　　 .

The backseat is not where you planned on losing your virginity. The massive frame of Sweetpea, known South-Side gang member, is not the body you pictured yourself encased beneath but as that thick tongue rolls down your neck just right and you shiver in anticipation, everything about your spontaneous choice feels so right. Rough hands ghost your curves, one stopping to squeeze your hips as he nuzzles against the shell of your ear, husky words of praise that most people wouldn’t ever associate with the surly Serpent.

❝ This won’t hurt long, baby girl. Daddy’s got you.❞ Sweetpea mumbles, the thunderous sound of the rain outside the car almost drowning out the husky sound. His voice is velvet. It’s gravel and it’s sex. It sends a thrill through your entire being. He tears your panties off and raises up, head bumping the roof of the car. You raise up too, gentle concern filling your eyes. ❝ Hey, why are you sittin, huh? I told you t’ lay there. Daddy’s got you.❞

❝ Daddy bumped his head though..❞ you’re teasing -and giggling, when you say it, but there’s this fire in his eyes when you parrot back the fact that he’s called himself daddy twice now. A cocky smirk plays at rough lips and he’s pressing down into you, cock rubbing against your aching center. Mouth against your neck as he lines himself up. ❝ You’re in for it now, baby girl.❞ and there’s a wild gleam in his eyes when they lock on you & the way your body is caged in beneath his. His hand captures both your wrists above your head and as the tip of his cock grazes against your sensitive opening, you moan out his name.

Some shitty rock band is playing at a low volume on the radio; neither of you are paying any attention. Sweetpea stares down at you, growling as he sinks into your cunt carefully. He’s still. Kissing you on your face, your mouth and your neck. With his free hand, he caresses your cheek.

❝ ‘S okay, baby girl. I’m gonna take real good care of you.❞ his voice is muffled because he’s started to suck your neck as he slides his cock in just a little deeper, raw... The burn you feel at being stretched beyond what you’re used to by his thick cock is starting to wear off and you rock yourself up into him. The hand against your cheek drifts down and squeezes your hip as he shakes his head at you. Chuckles quietly, the sound deep and a little dangerous. ❝ Aht aht. I think I told you to relax. Let me take care of this, baby girl.❞ Sweet Pea mumbles, cock sinking in just a little deeper.. He’s barely thrusting -it feels too damn good, and your nails dig into his shoulder as he fucks into you slow and careful.

To everyone else, he’s an asshole. Moody and a mean streak a mile wide. But right now, as he takes your virginity in his backseat, he’s sweet.

This may not have been your ideal first time but.. It’s so much better than your wildest dreams.

❝ Thatta girl.❞ he groans out as he feels your body really starting to unclench. Your hips meeting his clumsily. He’s almost tempted to put you on top - because he’s been imagining how you’d look, his massive hands on your hips, lifting you up to slam you back down on his thick cock, your tits bouncing, that fucked out look on your face, maybe even drooling a little, but tonight, this just feels better. ❝ – fuck, oh fuck… baby girl, you’re a perfect fit. Fuck.❞ is growled out against the shell of your ear as he starts to go just a little faster.

His teeth latch against your bottom lip and as soon as he’s let go of your hands, they’re all over him. Clumsily, because you don’t know what to do with them. Doesn’t take long to figure it out when his cock bottoms out and you’re whining, moaning his name and trying to match his thrusts just because it feels so good. He chuckles quietly, gazing down at you with lust-blown eyes full of open adoration. ❝ Ya so fuckin’ pretty, princess.❞ he murmurs, still in awe that he’s the guy taking your virginity.

Not somebody he feels is better. Him. You chose him.

It’s kind of mind-blowing.

Your soft laugh when he says it and the way you shake your head to disagree only have him falling even harder, faster than the speed of sound. When he feels your tight little cunt vise around his thick cock even more, he groans out loud. Dips down his head to settle his forehead against yours as he chuckles quietly, ❝ Does this.. Does it feel good, baby girl? Tell me..❞

You smile up at him, all fucked out and clingy as your first orgasm fades, breathe out against his mouth in that soft little voice that it does and he’s determined. You’re his girl now. His alone.

As his hips stammer and he tries to slow down, head off his own orgasm, you whine. Begging to feel him. Begging him to give it to you. He can’t hold off anymore, dots line his vision as he lets you cling to him and fucks into you faster. The car’s frame squeaking a little as it begins to rock softly. You’ve got a hand pressed against a foggy window. His orgasm shatters him and with his last slower and sloppier thrusts, he melts down into you, pulling you into a kiss so deep that you’re dizzy when it breaks.

❝ Love you, Sweetpea.❞

It’s the first time he’s ever heard anyone say it. At first, he doesn’t know how to react. At first, you’re afraid you’ve just crossed some boundary. You’re about to apologize but a thick digit presses against your lips to cut off your words. ❝ Love you too, princess.❞ he mutters quietly, softly against your mouth.

This is not how you pictured your first time, but.. It’s a night you’ll never forget.

#sweetpea #sweetpea fanfiction #sweetpea fanfic #sweetpea x reader #sweetpea x female reader #sweetpea x y/n #sweetpea x you #( ᴛʜᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴏ ʟɪsᴛ ✓ )#lazyghoulskinktober2023 #🔞ɴғᴡ. ᴍɪɴᴏʀs ᴅᴏ ɴᴏᴛ ɪɴᴛᴇʀᴀᴄᴛ ᴀɴᴅ ʀᴇᴀᴅ ᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴏᴡɴ ʀɪsᴋ.#( ᴛʜᴇ ʙᴏɴᴜs ʙʟᴜʀʙs )

50 notes · View notes

isa-ah · 2 years ago

Note

Honestly thank you for your take. Like, I’m easily agitable and get grumpy from stupid things and I *know* from my personality that T /is/ gonna make me angrier. But every time I try to say that, my girlfriend (also trans) tells me it won’t and that’s misinformation. Like…… I fucking know my mood and I’m tired of people invalidating my reasonable expectations for who I am as a person. I think it’s unreasonable to just expect me to be able to keep my cool through T and not have an adjustment period. And I feels like garbage that if I’m somehow affected by an expected change, the alternative is to immediately cannon-ball into toxic masculinity and suck up all my feelings into stoicism.

these tags someone put on the original post vvvvv

#i got some pretty wild mood side effects on t and Yeah it affected my libido #but you know what? #T making me angry taught me a lot about anger #it was an emotion that had been explosive for me Before transition#and i had a really bad temper #T made me angry with enough regularity #that i had to learn to coexist with anger #to let anger exist and pass #i ironically gained a lot More patience because I got angry #i learned that it- like any other feeling- is worth looking at and examining#and now i pretty much never act in anger #i know how to be angry and let it exist and know it's not some Evil Sinful Thing or some Righteous Moral Fury#which i didn't before taking a medication that made me angry!!! #anger is okay! #being angry or horny or loud does not make you surrender all your morals and fundamentally doomed to being cruel to others! #no reaction in your body or emotion or feeling Dooms You to be Evil or Abusive #lots of things make people angry #and it's okay! #it's okay to be angry!

theres also the fact that like, theres a likelihood your gf went through a period of "boys will be boys" where she was allowed to experience puberty and act out and be a wild child freak as most kids experiencing a testosterone driven puberty are, around peers also going through it, around understanding of "well thats just how it is", with male role models to explain to her whats happening, why, and to some extent how to handle it; VS being in your twenties (assuming u are) and being expected to be polite and well mannered going through the Same Type of Puberty as a 13yo boy with all the problems of a 20smtn adult man, with a hearty lack of male role models to help you through it and MOUNTAINS of stress and work and the world burning down that a kids never going to have to deal with.

we dont get the leeway to have an adjustment period, and no amount of baby talking us into believing it wont happen will make it not happen. it just means we have to do the emotional labor to "spare" everyone else. (as dfab people are expected to do from childhood). given that testosterone does effect you in that way cause obviously its not the same for everyone, but you know yourself and you sound pretty damn aware of it.

have a messy transition! act out! be loud! you DESERVE to have the formative experience associated with your puberty, and youll probably learn a lot about yourself in the process. you have self awareness and coping skills a kids not going to have, so you CAN experience your anger, your aggression, and learn how to live WITH it instead of trying to bottle it up.

#obviously not boys will be boysing your gf you get what i mean. the peer and parental treatment likely associated w being young and amab #*likely bc like again obviously no 2 people have the same experience. im talking broadly

34 notes · View notes

inyw21 · 2 years ago

Text

I'm bored on a Friday night so why not answer all these!! (It's a later date) (also I know actual plays aren't technically audio dramas, but for the sake of me being the person to answer this, they are) (think of it as just "podcasts"

1. What's the first audio drama you ever listened to? The Adventure Zone: Balance

2. What's a song you associate really strongly with a specific show? "Long Live" by Taylor Swift for Rusty Quill Gaming (thanks Bryn)

3. State some things you'd like to hear in the next show you listen to and let your follower recommend things to you. I'm not gonna do this cause most of my followers have suggested shows and I have a list a mile long.

4. What's your favorite completed show? Probably TAZ:B or TAZ:A (Amnesty)

5. Name a trope you like that's specific to audio drama. Not sure if it counts as a trope, but good sound effects.

6. What's your favourite audio drama ship? Tough one. Taako and Kravitz, Aubrey and Danny, and Zolf and Wilde.

7. What's your favorite piece of music from any show? Anything written by Griffin for TAZ and also "The Lament of the Phoenix" from The Amelia Project.

8. If you could have a crossover between any two shows, which would it be? I think The Amelia Project and TAZ Amnesty would be fun! Imagine the chaos.

9. What's your favorite character dynamic to write/listen to? Banter hands down. I love listening to and writing witty remarks.

10. Recommend a show! GIRL IN SPACE ONG PLEASE GO LISTEN TO IT. @girlinspacepodcast

11. What are you currently listening to? I'm currently listening to The Amelia Project and Dimension 20 Fantasy High S1.

12. If you could adapt any public domain work into an audio drama, what would it be? Hmmmm as much as I wasn't a huge fan of the book, I think Frankenstein would make for a fun podcast.

13. [ASKER CHOICE PODCAST] TV show fancast (funny or serious). I'm terrible at fancasts. The only thing I can picture is Alan Burgen playing his own character from Amelia.

14. Which audio drama would you most want to live in? Oh now that's tough, probably one lf the TAZ worlds.

15. Uno reverse! What's a question YOU want to ask everyone else about audio drama? What/who got you into them? For me it was my best friend who started TAZ on a whim and cackled as I caught up to them.

16. What's a role you heard an actor in, but almost didn't recognize them? Alan Burgen. I heard him first in @thekilda and heard him second in Amelia. Took an entire season for me to realize. (even though both shows list credits at the end of each ep)

17. Top fics [ASKED CHOOSES TOPIC] in audio drama. I'm gonna do top five finales.

1. TAZ Balance

2. TAZ Amnesty

3. S4 The Amelia Project

4. S4 The Magnus Archives

5. S3 Rusty Quill Gaming

18. Design an outfit for [ASKER CHOOSES CHARACTER]. I'm doing Alvina from Amelia. I think she would be dressed sensibly but comfortably. Jeans, t-shirt, sturdy shoes, that sort of thing.

19. Which podcast do you think would make a great TTRPG book? Amelia! Having to work out how to come up with elaborate schemes to fake deaths? So fun!

20. Which podcast character do you think would have their own podcast in an AU? Alvina again. She seems the industrious type. They're a lot of work!

21. Favorite audio drama sphere meme? Hands down the "no beta we kayak like Tim" AO3 tag.

22. Which episode of an audio drama do you think you've listened to the most? Hard to say since I don't really do individual eps on their own. I do full relistens. Probably the middle of RQG.

23. Why do you like audio drama as a medium? Because it's completely accessable to me (I know not to everyone and I'll bang pots and pans for propper transcripts right along side you)

24. What show are you most looking forward to that isn't out yet? I don't have one currently. I've dropped off the audio drama sphere a bit. I will say I'm looking forward to the rest of Amelia!!

If you made it this far, thanks for humoring me!

Audio drama ask meme

For creators and fans! Twitter’s dying, let’s get to know some fine tumblr folk!

1. What’s the first audio drama you ever listened to?

2. What’s a song you associate really strongly with a specific show?

3. State some things you’d like to hear in the next show you listen to and let your follower recommend things to you.

4. What’s your favourite completed show?

5. Name a trope you like that’s specific to audio drama.

6. What’s your favourite audio drama ship?

7. What’s your favourite piece of music from any show?

8. If you could have a crossover between any two shows which would it be?

9. What’s your favourite character dynamic to write/listen to?

10. Recommend a show!

11. What are you currently listening to?

12. If you could adapt any public domain work into an audio drama what would it be?

13. [ASKER CHOOSES PODCAST] TV show fan cast (funny or serious).

14. Which audio drama world would you most want to live in?

15. Uno reverse! What’s a question YOU want to ask everyone else about audio drama?

16. What’s a role you heard an actor you know in, but almost didn’t recognise them?

17. Top five [ASKED CHOOSES TOPIC] in audio drama?

18. Design an outfit for [ASKER CHOOSES CHARACTER]

19. Which podcast do you think would make a great TTRPG book?

20. Which podcast character do you think would have their own podcast in an AU?

21. Favourite audio drama sphere meme?

22. Which episode of any audio drama do you think you’ve listened to most?

23. Why do you like audio drama as a medium?

24. What show are you most looking forward to that isn’t out yet?

25. (sorry, this one’s a creator-special) Where did you get the idea for your show from and what made you want to create it?

As always, you don’t need to send asks to reblog! Please do share this around!

#d20 #dimension 20 #the adventure zone #taz #taz balance #taz amnesty #the amelia project #tap #the secrets of st kilda #rusty quil gaming #the magnus archives #audiofiction #audio drama #podcasts

331 notes · View notes

bollur · 3 years ago

Text

tomorrow, summer ends // percival de rolo (1/?)

a/n: this was a beautiful idea from a couple of lovely people: @strawberryjamwitch & @theriverstyx-runscopper (i'll tag you two in each addition, and if anyone else wants the same let me know) and i really couldn't pass it up. i hope no one minds that this is going to be multiple parts as my imagination ran wild and it would feel far too rushed for me to put it into a one-shot.

this is set in a little more of a modern!au, so things might be a little bit different. maybe i'll botch (i'll definitely botch it bc that's all i do with anything actually) it like a bad nose job and it'll be uber shitty, idk, but i'm gonna keep on with it bc my brain laid an egg and i am determined to hatch it. im so fired up rn i don't even care if everyone hates it.

now excuse me while i go try and feel again. p.s. no i couldn't think of a better name for the doctor so just sue me already

It was almost chaotic, the setting of the office; papers strewn and books scattered on glass tables, chairs moved in an unorganized fashion, and he could see the specs of dust floating in the sunlight peeking through slitted blinds. One would have to wonder if this was actually a respectable establishment with its unkempt appearance. Perhaps whoever took care of the managerial aspect could blame the fact he was there before opening but is a place not supposed to look its finest at all times in case of an inspection, and if operating times really mattered why was the damned door unlocked?

He idly picked up a Cosmopolitan magazine, only to carelessly drop it back down on the table, not even bothering to give an uninterested once-over, an overwhelming need to do something. A moment of silence passed his thoughts, like a radio tower shut-off and suddenly he exhaled sharply, hanging his head, slowly leaning forward and allowing it to lightly bump the wall. That tower powered back on, bringing massive feedback in its wake as he asked himself one simple question:

Why the hell was he here so early if he didn’t even want to be here at all?

He could have laughed at the predicament that question now left him in, and what better place to sort that out if not in this fucking office. He could take the time to dwell on it, but as the front door to the office suddenly flew open with more force than needed, his back straightened and he wiped any noticeable expression off his face, bringing himself back to a presentable front. Percival wished he could say the interest working its way onto his face was feigned, watching you look back at the door in confusion before you cautiously closed it, opened it, and repeated the process at least twice. “Oh,” a soft noise escaped your mouth, and if he hadn’t been listening intently, he probably would have only heard incoherent mutters. “I guess he fixed it.”

There was doubt in his mind about this place, to begin with, so maybe it was biased that he wasn’t surprised the door was apparently broken at one point, or perhaps it was just his desire to be anywhere but here, rather. He was bound and determined with a negative attitude to find everything he could wrong with this place, an excuse to never step foot into it again. He didn’t need to be here - it was only a waste of good money for him to not be here.

It was only a waste of good money for him to be here.

Perhaps he could have stopped staring - well, yes, he should have stopped staring, actually. With the group of people he associated with, the idea of someone being perplexed by a door really shouldn't have interested him so much, or maybe their uninhibited actions were beginning to rub off and have some influence on him. So when you turned around, finding him staring at you, he couldn't do anything but quickly turn his head to stare interested at the wall, just a hint of heat rising to his cheeks.

Good on him for trying to use the typical 'i actually happen to find this non-existent spot on the wall the most interesting thing in the world' play of action, but looking at it now, he couldn't deny that it was a rather beautiful shade of sage green. He might have to remember that - his workroom was in need of a new coat soon, maybe a change wouldn't be bad for it. Everyone (whose opinions really didn't matter) kept nagging at him to brighten it up there, but he wasn't about to do it because they told him to.

A soft titter met his ears, pulling him to glance from his peripheral. "Well, this is a disaster," your head turned, surveying the room.

It was obvious you were talking to yourself - you had no reason to address him, he was a stranger that you - him assuming - embarrassed yourself in front of. But Percy couldn't help but quip sarcastically, "On the contrary, I thought it looked rather charming." you stopped mid-push of returning a chair to sit against the wall, gave a small snort of amusement, and finished your mission.

Silence fell over the room, the only sound being your shuffling around, moving things here and there. Perhaps he could have been ... less rude and offered to help, but it wasn't his job (if it was even yours - you didn't look like you worked here), he didn't even want to be here.

Why was he here?

'It's just not healthy to bottle everything up, darling,' the sound of Vex's voice echoed in his mind, reigning on top of a cluster-fuck that could build in his chest until it exploded and shatter his ribs for all he gave a damn. At least, he told himself so, because what was the point in any of it?

Percival de Rolo was well enough acquainted with the villains that lived in his head that he had become bigger than them, better, meaner. He beat them away in his shop, pounding iron and steel to the heat of the forge until they were nothing but a material molded for his personal use. His heart held vengeance, hatred, and his soul craved for the idea of redemption on what was taken from him and he could bury them behind a consistent pile of work that would occupy him for hours on end, a sickening feeling of power as he used and manipulated them as he had been.

Inwardly he felt himself wince because when he put it that way, of course, it sounded wrong, but he was dealing with it in his own comfortable way. What was so wrong with that? He had made it this far in life with a devil on each shoulder, so why did things have to change? Fingers dug into the fabric of his pants, fists lightly clenching, the silence in the room rang in his ears, and he could hear the thrumming of his own heart. One might find it soothing, but to him, it was only a reminder of what he lived for.

Looking up, Percy was met with a set of eyes looking at him from across the room - he expected pity, muscles tensing before he even read the expression on your face, but he was met with a sight of apprehension. He wanted to throw a snide remark as his lips pursed in displeasure, but when he held that gaze, feeling irritatingly vulnerable, a timid smile crossed your lips and the golden rays peeking in the room felt a bit more alive.

Whatever connection was being made broke as the door flung open once more, the both of you quickly looking away, amaranth light dusting your cheeks as the air in the room became quickly awkward. He could vaguely make out your fingers fiddling with the corners of the pages of your book, but he was trying not to look at you. Not that it wouldn't be fair with how you so rudely watched him like he was some bird in a fucking tree.

"You must be my 9 o'clock," a new voice entered the room, and Percy looked up to see an older (though not much older than himself) gentleman with tied-back hair and a shadow of a day late shave.

They exchanged a firm shake. "Percival Fredrickstein von Musel Klossowski de Rolo III," he confirmed, letting his hand drop to his side. "But you may call me Percival."

The man smiled, nodding his head. "Wonderful - I'm Dr. Mercer, but you can call me Matthew, or Matt if that makes you more comfortable." Percy held back his look of distaste at the man in front of him. There were no real hard feelings, he didn't even know this man, but he couldn't help but slightly project his undesire to even be here.

Nothing could make him comfortable right now.

Dr. Mercer's face changed, confused, looking between Percy and you for a moment. "How did you two get in here?"

Neither of you skipped a beat responding to his question:

"The door was unlocked - "

" - you forgot to lock the door, again."

He found himself looking at you once again, both of you perplexed before turning away quickly, looking in opposite directions once again. He could see Matt flash a quick but very curious look between the two of you. The Doctor shrugged nonchalantly. "At least there's nothing important in here."

Yeah, there was definitely nothing that could Percy comfortable with being here.

The walk back to his actual office was uneventful, to say the least. Percival could only keep a straight face, mentally running through a hundred scenarios and answers to different questions, perhaps in a way that would cut all this short and he would never have to come back again. Walking through the door, all Percy could think to himself was that at least it was more organized than the waiting area.

Matt gestured to a seat, any seat, in particular, Percy assumed as there were three armchairs and a couch, before sitting down in one of his own beside an end table that had a legal pad, a cup, and a pen on it. Once he took a seat, the Doctor rubbed his hands together almost playfully. "So, Percival," he began laying his forearms across the arms of the chair, his one hand resting right on his notepad. "How - "

While anyone would appreciate the casual setting, a Doctor trying to seem normal for a situation akin to walking on thin ice. It would have been comforting if he had half a mind to even care about being here. "Listen, Doctor," Percy began, sitting down in the armchair right across from him, crossing an ankle over his knee in a subtle display of comfortable dominance. "I'm not here for you to prevaricate your questions - in fact, I'd be rather insulted by it," he admitted smoothy, gaze not wavering from the Doctor.

There was a moment of silence and Percy could feel his finger methodically tapping against one that it was laced with on his lap. Hostility it was it could very well be viewed as, and while he felt like he had something to defend, it wasn't a lie that if he was going to sit here, he wasn't going to be treated like porcelain that could crack with one wrong word.

He was stronger than that.

Dr. Mercer's demeanor didn't change one bit, in fact, he seemed almost more relaxed than before. "You're right, my apologies - we're both adults here," he agreed, nodding his head and proceeding to ask: "So, why are you here?"

Now that was the fucking question, wasn't it?

Whatever flame Percy held in his chest slowly began to simmer out, dwindling down to burning embers and he felt his breath catch in his throat, suffocating him. He had an answer, he just needed to say it. It wasn't hard. He had faced horrors beyond this. But why did something within him hold back on his scripted words?

Collecting himself, his back straightened. "I'm here because a group of assholes decided to pay for several sessions in advance," he began steadily, igniting the flame of confidence, building up a wall as sturdy as Rome. "and one of them values money more than life itself."

"So you don't feel the need to be here?" Matt asked genuinely curious, and they watched each other intently. "There's nothing you want to talk about?"

It was an honest question that would receive an equally honest reply. "No," Percival responded, turning his head to look out the window. The sun was shining, birds plucking berries from the trees and the sky was clear, and he was wasting his time here. Not that he would even be outside enjoying it if he wasn't. "I don't believe in talking about the past when it cannot be changed."

A thoughtful noise came from Dr. Mercer, followed by a soft click. "I see,"

Percy's eyes narrowed slightly, turning his head to look at the Doctor in suspicion as the sound of writing. "You - what are you doing?" he asked, seeing the doctor's hand off to the side, moving the pen against paper. "What are you writing?"

Matt only gave him a sheepish smile in response, finishing his work and then fiddling with the pen between his fingers, flicking it back and forth like a metronome and Percival sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose in annoyance.

Maybe he should just let Vex kill him for letting the money go to waste. He felt like it already was.

#WOW THIS WAS A LOT #don't touch me im in pain #this really got away from me #just like the piece of banana i lost on my couch and now i cannot find and am mildly concerned #plot twist my couch is actually a mimic #guess it means it eats ass all day SDKFFF #ill see myself out #percival x reader #vox machina x reader #critical role x reader #percival fredrickstein von musel de rolo iii #percy de rolo #the legend of vox machina #percival de rolo x reader #percy de rolo x reader #percy x reader #percival de rolo #critical role

96 notes · View notes

honeyed-sunflowers · 2 years ago

Text

I posted 4,420 times in 2022

That's 3,031 more posts than 2021!

259 posts created (6%)

4,161 posts reblogged (94%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@your-brittle-heart-warm

@lostinthestarsss

@1989tv

@garden-of-the-soul

I tagged 840 of my posts in 2022

#asks - 166 posts

#moots <3 - 72 posts

#anon - 39 posts

#sakshi ✨💕 - 37 posts

#taylor swift - 35 posts

#sparklingstar 🧡🧡🧡 - 27 posts

#thank you! 🍭 - 26 posts

#picrew - 25 posts

#tag games - 21 posts

#🫀 - 16 posts

Longest Tag: 105 characters

#your spotify was tay-tay-fangirl-original-motion-picture-soundtrack-awkward-middle-school-slow-dance bad.

My Top Posts in 2022:

heaven sounds like this 💗

28 notes - Posted May 6, 2022

Tag ur top 10 moots and write smth nice abt them!(if u want to tag more than 10 that's fine!)

hey, anon! thank you for sending this ask!! i'm gonna tag all my adorable mutuals and/or people i love! ❤️

@sugarspiceandeverythingnoice @sparklingstarr-tv @your-brittle-heart-warm @1989tv @doctorcheeseburst @cruelestwonderland @midnights-13 @toowisetotrustme-toooldtocare @allyonthemoon @candyswiz @ourstv @kazzlethedazzle @taylorswifff @midnights-xiii @lostinthestarsss @lovethethief @garden-of-the-soul @salenagomez @dried-roses-old-letters @vesperaverysage @fearlesslymarta

you guys have made my year so wonderful with your kindness, jokes, and infinite love and care. 🥺🌻

i'm also using this opportunity to let you all know that i'm going on a long break now until all my exams are over. that's gonna take at least six more months. i'm going to miss you all so much!

i'll be here on specific days like for midnights release, christmas, and/or new year! so until we meet again, stay safe, and stay beautiful. i love you all to the moon and to saturn. 🪐💝

(i'll still keep my discord, so you can reach out to me there if you wish to!)

31 notes - Posted October 1, 2022

new theme! 🌻

“she is the sunlight and the sun is gone~”

— trading yesterday [she is the sunlight]

See the full post

36 notes - Posted February 12, 2022

Midnights – Taylor Swift

Side A: The Dark Side of The Moon

1. New Moons: the first track, starting with a slow rhythm and then building up. theme – being afraid of the new changes in life, like going to a new school and the fear that keeps you awake at night. here, new moons, refer to youngsters facing life changes. this will be the other pov of nothing new. (‘the kind of radiance you only have at 17’ but it'll show the struggle of being 17 here)

2. Saudade: it means nostalgic or melancholic longing. this can be about wishing to go back to a certain time of life when you believed you were the happiest or had someone precious but they aren't around anymore. it can be about sleepless nights thinking about that moment of life.

3. The Tale Of October: this can be a narrative style of song, following the story of a memorable october – how that month symbolises something meaningful to the narrator. it can also include myths associated with this month (it's known as the month of gods in japanese folklore).

4. Cinderella's Shoe: a long-story short kind of song – but it focuses mainly on the negative/darker side of it. inspired by the saying “if cinderella's shoe fit her, why did it fall?” and the enchantment that wears off by midnight.

5. Insomnia: for all the night owls. for those nights where sleep is a distant place, an escape from reality, but it's hard to reach it. it'll include wild thoughts, anxiety and/or imaginations we may conjure while trying to sleep. this will be the saddest song, of course.

6. Werewolves: a song about transformation (every full moon, so contrasting the first track). halloween vibes that will first show werewolves (humans) as monsters but slowly show the misunderstood side of them. it will have reputation vibes and be the song connecting side a with side b.

☄️☄️☄️☄️☄️☄️☄️☄️☄️

Side B: Midnight Paradise

7. Meet Me At Midnight: the first single of the album. it will be a beautiful, romantic song but with hints of fear of losing it, just like delicate or peace. it'll also follow a timeline, like the first verse will be about 10 pm, the second verse will be about 11 pm and in the bridge, at midnight, the two lovers will finally meet.

8. Aquila: it's a midnight constellation, in the shape of an eagle. it'll be about the random bursts of creativity or ideas we may get when we are about to sleep. it can symbolise independence (like owning your own music) or about the growth that occurs in solitude, which no one appreciates us for.

9. Stargazing: another love song, but this one goes like a fairytale. like love story or invisible string. it can be about staying up late at night with someone special, spending your midnights with them after a long day.

10. Temporary Deaths: thinking about lost friendships or relationships and finally understanding how to let them go. it's a slow song about goodbyes, how they tear us apart, how we wish to avoid them, but they still happen. “temporary death” refers to how a part of us dies when someone we cherished disappears from our life.

11. Cerulean: it's about love that keeps you awake at night. it can either take a happy or a sad turn, depending on the listener, so the writing will just super creative.

12. Lanterns: inspired by the emily dickinson quote “i'm out with lanterns looking for myself”. taylor also mentioned ‘lanterns’ in the announcement post. it's about self-discovery or self-reflection. finding your mistakes, forgiving yourself and being free from the guilt, and working on being a better person. it's about accepting our true nature and being at peace with it.

13. The Witching Hour: technically, the witching hour is 3 a.m. so this song takes place after midnight. a story about witches (inspired by a poetry series i once wrote), how the public humiliates them but they stay up all night for a good cause instead. a song with i did something bad and mad woman vibes but it will have less angry tone, and more like “i turned the stones you threw at me into jewels” vibes.

so, this is something i've always wanted to do but never got the chance to do it. i'm not so sure about how much it makes sense or if it matches the theme of the album enough but this album allowed my imaginations to run wild and i knew i had to do something about it! let me know if you liked my ideas! and if possible, i'll try to write some of the songs or just turn them into poems. until next time, keep burning the midnight oil! *winks*

– dandelion

See the full post

42 notes - Posted August 30, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

it’s time to go || good-byes

i have always been terrified of goodbyes. in my head, they were the worst thing that could ever happen to me. i don't know what was worse — saying goodbyes or receiving them. naturally, i have been bad at handling those situations. at first, they were invisible. like childhood best friends who did not find me "cool" enough to hang out with me or my favourite teachers who disappeared into the crowds and never appeared after i left my pre-school. those goodbyes were not defined, so many words were left unsaid, so many emotions forever bottled in my heart that i still write about in poems. but then came the goodbyes that were said. maybe that should have been the point where i should have realised why. it was because i had grown to deny whenever a friendship started fading away. i was clinging and holding on to the person even though they've had enough of me and only wished to leave. even after they left, for good, all i did was weep and weep. in poems, in songs, in everything that i did, a part of me wept forever, waiting for them to come back and tell me they'd never leave me again. i think a part of me still does... but it's not like before. and i'm sure i'm not alone, that there are so many people who are still learning how to accept goodbyes and not let it kill them.

earlier, i used to try to find new ways to show people just how useful and lovely i can be. it was selfish, or perhaps, it was truly out of love, but in the end, i wanted them to stay. i did not want any more goodbyes. so, i went out of my way to love them, shower them with as much as i had to offer, showing them the most authentic and lovable version of me. i wanted to give them reasons to stay. but, did it stop certain people from leaving? of course not. no matter how hard you try, you cannot make someone love you. you can beg and cry all you want but if they want, they will surely leave you. they do not owe you anything. and they do not have to hold on to you forever, even if you are the best for them. it's just how life works. certain ships are meant to stay as long as the storm is raging and once the ocean is calm, they will sail off to other islands. certain butterflies love to visit you while you are full of flowers and sunlight, but they cannot stay when the rain comes pouring down. some will only find you in autumn leaves, others in chocolate ice-cream cones, and some in your neatly handwritten study notes. you can try to show them that they are wrong or that you deserve better, and maybe you are right, but they will leave when the time comes. however, there's one thing you can control — your reaction to their departure.

grieving is not a bad thing. in fact, i feel like it's so important to grieve freely and unapologetically. but once that's done, we have to truly let them go. they can leave physically but only we can remove them from our minds. only we, ourselves, can wipe the ghosts that we allowed to haunt our bones because that's just what we knew at that moment of vulnerability. but now, it's different. time makes you stronger and smarter. what feels like the death of you may not threaten you by the next decade. goodbyes felt like the end of my world but now, i know they are there. they are always waiting in the dark corners of life. but now, if a dear friend of mine says their time has come, i hope i will be able to see them off without breaking down and losing all my hopes for a good life. i hope i won't rely on their ghosts to bring me a sense of peace and can find other ways to regain the happiness i need in my life.

goodbyes, whether said or not, are still something i hope to see less often in life. but the fact that i am not constantly worried about "who is going to stay?" and "who will be the next person to leave?", i think i can survive them. i have survived them, even the worst ones, and i know it gets harder as life goes on, but it also gets easier to accept them. they will come and go but what stays with us are the lessons and memories and those are the things i want to remember. not the nights my hand feels a little too empty or the way they burn down my house as they leave. as long as i do not give people the ability to kill me when they leave, i will be all right. because i deserve to survive these storms. i deserve a life that is not defined by goodbyes. and only i can create that life. it's my choice. it has always been my choice. and i am finally accepting goodbyes for what they are — endings — heartbreaking but necessary endings; promises of a better sunrise. i hope i will remember this the next time i watch a relationship break and i'll know when it's time to go.

— dandelion [it's time to go]

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

108 notes - Posted January 26, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #Spotify #oh wow what a year #thanks for showing all the love to my top posts 🥺💛

13 notes · View notes

distortedbeat · 2 years ago

Text

top 5 song associations

share the top songs in your playlist that most inspire / represent your muses the most. bonus points if you include lyrics to go along with it.

usseewa - ado (will stetson cover)

yes, i'm a pillar of a moral code so no, i'll be peaceful when it comes to blows pen sharper than both the gun and sword i'll shoot with my words to battle we go!

die young - kesha

lookin' for some trouble tonight take my hand, i'll show you the wild side like it's the last night of our lives we'll keep dancing 'til we die

angry too - lola blanc

'cause another and another comin' up out of the gutter till I'm drowning in an ocean of entitled motherfuckers and they're pushin' all my buttons but they never seem to wonder why

the phoenix - fall out boy

hey young blood, doesn't it feel like our time is running out? i'm gonna change you like a remix then I'll raise you like a phoenix wearing our vintage misery no, I think it looked a little better on me i'm gonna change you like a remix then I'll raise you like a phoenix

still feel - half alive

I can feel a kick down in my soul And it's pulling me back to Earth to let me know I am not a slave, can't be contained So pick me from the dark and pull me from the grave, 'cause I still feel alive

-------------

tagged by: @slayersaided (thank you!!) tagging: @invisiquirk @stigmatvm @multianime @detonizing @portraitsof @jinnorei @deathleads @kibonosentoki and whoever else wants to! tag me when you do <3

#❧ ｢ general ｣ ⸻ ooc #❧ ｢ general ｣ ⸻ dash gamesi #i don't actually have a jirou playlist yet so i had to dig through all the songs in my head #but i think these were decent enough slkafmdlkhm

8 notes · View notes

mediicusvitae · 2 years ago

Text

top 5 song associations : trafalgar d. water lamy.

share the top songs in your playlist that most inspire / represent your muses the most. bonus points if you include lyrics to go along with it.

woke up a rebel by reuben and the dark

I am wild, I am lost | I am sick, I am damned But I am holding redemption in the palm of my hand So I tighten my fist | And sharpen my teeth It's a promise I made | It's secret I keep

I am lookin' for trouble | And trouble I will find You will get what is comin' | I'll take back what is mine I'll set fire to this dream | I'll set fire to this dream And I will rise

the light behind your eyes by my chemical romance

So long to all of my friends | Every one of them met tragic ends With every passing day | I'd be lying if I didn't say That I miss them all tonight | And if they only knew what I would say

If I could be with you tonight | I would sing you to sleep Never let them take the light behind your eyes One day, I'll lose this fight | As we fade in the dark Just remember you will always burn as bright

war rages on by alex care

The war rages on You'll be at my side Through it all Through hardships unseen We'll still survive, fortified

Please don't pass me by Can't you hear me calling out your name? Forgive the things I do Don't turn your back when I need you The war rages on

help our souls by nihils

Living in fear, hell at my feet, heaven is out of reach And there's a fire that I once laid There's a fire but no fire brigade Help our souls tonight We are losing, losing this fight

Help our souls tonight Is there no one on our side? Who's gonna help our souls tonight? No one here to Help our souls tonight It's on me, it's on you To survive

landscape by florence + the machine

'Cause she's just like the weather, can't hold her together Born from dark water, daughter of the rain and snow Because it's burning through the bloodline It's cutting down the family tree Growing in the landscape, darling, in between you and me

tagged by: @killedarlings — thank you, dear! ♡✧( •⌄• )

tagging: @muselexum ( any muse! ), @akagamiko, @medicus-mortem, @afailedkingsheart, @ikkaku-of-heart, @pirateborn, @regensia ( any muse! ), @crewisms ( any muse! ), @bsrkr ( any muse! ) and everybody else on the dash!

#The Patient { aesthetic. }#{ dash games. }#{ ah yes - the struggle of choosing just 5 songs from my 220+ songs lamy playlist asdfglklj }#{ thanks for the tag!! c: }#North Blue Hymns { muse songs. }

13 notes · View notes

writing-in-april · 4 years ago

Text

Pleasant Surprise

Spencer Reid x Female Reader

Summary: Reader asks Spencer if she can try to be more dominant in the bedroom.

A/N: This is my 5th fic for my 750 follower celebration! This one was especially hard for me to finish, I’ve had a massive headache all day 🤕 it was also hard because this reader is definitely very different to how I am in real life. I hope you guys do enjoy it I tried really hard to make sure I could finish it today. Thank you @spencers-dria again for fueling all my sub Spencer fics this week and giving me this idea!!

Warnings: 18+, Reader is a bit nervous at first, Use of the name Bunny (F), Spencer is tied up, Hand job, Sex toy (wand vibrator M receiving), Edging

Main Masterlist Word count: 1.4K

“Hey Spencer?” You called from the bedroom of your apartment with Spencer just a little bit nervously, you couldn’t lose your nerve. it was now or never.

“Yes, bunny? What is it?” You always blushed a little everytime Spencer used that nickname, inside and outside the bedroom. Usually, Spencer was the dominant one in the bedroom. Recently however, you had been fantasizing what it would be like to have him underneath you for a change. You had been wondering endlessly how he would react. Would he beg for you quickly? Or would he be stubborn? Would he be a brat? Or would he be a good boy for you?

The questions wouldn’t stop bouncing around in your head and you finally decided that you needed to ask him if he would let you test it out. Your resolve dimmed just a little as Spencer entered the bedroom after you had not responded immediately.

“W-well I was wondering…”

“Wondering what?” He looked concerned now, his eyebrows raised high as he made his way to sit next to where you sat on the bed.

“I was wondering if maybeyouwouldletmedominateyou?” You rushed out, faster then even Spencer normally spoke when he was especially excited about something.

“Could you say that again I didn’t quite catch that.” He was probably thinking that there was a much more serious thing going on, you felt kind of bad that you unnecessarily worried him. Hopefully, you could actually get the words out, instead of worrying poor Spencer anymore, he already worried enough as is.

“I-I was wondering… If maybe you would let me dominate you?” Even if Spencer said no to your request, you were proud of yourself for finding the words to ask.

“Th-that’s not what I was expecting you to ask me…” He wrung his fingers while he stuttered, however he wasn’t rejecting you, he looked intrigued if anything.

“But, would you be interested in it Spencer?” You bit your lip in anticipation, pretty sure that he was probably interested just by reading his immediate reaction to your request. His eyes were focused intently on you with his pupils blown wide and when you looked at his slacks you could tell that they were tightening slightly.

“Yes.” Once he had confirmed that this was something that he wanted, your confidence returned, and you were ready to unleash all your thoughts onto Spencer.

“You’ll let me know if it’s too much?” He snickered a little at your worry, probably thinking that you weren’t even going to get close to his threshold. However, you had some pretty extreme plans up your sleeve.

“Of course, bunny.”

—-

You now had him laying down on the bed completely naked, legs spread and a tie he no longer really used knotted around his wrists bound to the bed frame. Spencer’s eyes were wild and desperate already with his cock hard leaking precum all over his belly. You hadn’t even really touched him yet besides a few kisses. Spencer definitely wasn’t expecting you to be this prepared.

Grabbing the lube and opening it you then dripped it over his leaking cock, making sure to make a show of it before wrapping your hands around his length. You started to jerk him slowly, barely even really brushing over the skin causing Spencer to let out a beautiful high pitched whine.

“Does that feel good baby?” You teased, knowing it wasn’t nearly enough for any kind of relief, really only serving to spread the lube around. Then you moved your mouth down near his cock letting your hot breath hit him while you continued your lazy hand movements.

“Bunnyyy- Bunny, Will you please let me touch you?!” Before you had started, you had asked him to still call you bunny, finding it quite amusing how he was begging for mercy so easily while using a moniker normally associated with submissives. You hummed and thought about his request for a moment while he writhed in desperation underneath you.

“No, I don’t think you’re nearly desperate enough for me yet. We’ve only just started.” He was most definitely one to beg easily, after all you had only been jerking his cock for a minute before he had already started pleading. You continued to pull pleas from him, only speeding up slightly when you wanted to make his moans just a little bit louder. When you could tell he was going to cum soon you pulled away, his hips bucking up off the bed

“Please! Bunny- free me, let me touch you! You know I’ll make it feel good!” His pleas did little to convince you, you still had so much planned. You then went under your bed to pull out your secret weapon. Your hitachi magic wand. The wand was normally used by Spencer to edge you and you thought it was time for a little bit of payback.

“Remember to let me know if it's too much for you, Spencer.” You said as you made your way back to him armed with the rechargeable vibrator. Spencer’s eyes were wild as he nodded in confirmation.

It roared to life when you pressed the power button, then you brought it to his cock lightly while you sat on top of his thighs. When you started to focus the vibrations at the head of his cock his thighs started to shake under you and his eyes rolled back.

“Remember to ask for permission.” Taunting him evilly while you turned up the vibrations to a slightly higher setting.

“I cant- I cant, I’m gonna cum!” He cried, with involuntary tears now rolling down his cheeks.

“Hold it. If you hold it just for a few more seconds I’ll let you touch me.” He let out an unexpected growl at your command, causing the fire in your belly to be stoked just a little bit more. He probably expected to be allowed to take over when you freed him, but you weren’t going to give up control that easily.

After the few seconds were up, you removed the wand from his aching cock. He jerked around again in frustration after being edged for the second time, but he’d soon be happy that he successfully held it. Once he started to come back from the edge you reached forward to undo the knot of the tie and he breathed a sigh, relieved that he was free.

When he tried to flip you over to enact his own little revenge you held your ground, the only way you were going to let him fuck you is if you were on top. You gripped his jaw between your fingers and pulled his face up close to yours, then making him look directly before speaking, “Remember I’m in charge tonight. I get to be on top or you don’t get to fuck me. Do you understand?”

“Yes, Bunny. I understand... Can you please fuck me?” You let go of his face after he spoke, letting him hit the back of his pillows harshly before giving him some relief by sinking down on his cock.

You weren’t gentle as you started to roll your hips into his own, loving the feeling of Spencer’s cock dragging through your walls. Spencer was crying underneath you, begging for you to let him cum as he gripped your hips hard.

“You only get to cum after I do.” You growled out while slamming your hips down harshly, causing a squeak to fall from him. Luckily for Spencer, it didn’t take long for your own orgasm to come over, helped by him rubbing your clit in quick circles. It was a long and powerful one, coming over in waves that had you moaning out loudly as well. Spencer was finally going to get what he had been desperate for.

“Alright, you can cum.” All you had to do was say those simple words and Spencer exploded inside of you. His moans were so loud while he rode it out that you were sure you guys were going to get a complaint in the morning.

After you both had come down a little you made sure to do a similar aftercare routine that Spencer did for you when he dominated you- cleaning him up, massaging his wrists with lotion, getting him some fresh clothes, and especially making sure to cuddle him up tight. Just before you were about to fall asleep Spencer asked you, “You were really good at that bunny, that was a pleasant surprise. Can you do it again sometime?”

—-

Tag list (message me if you want to be added):

All works:

@shotarosleftpinky

Spencer Reid/CM

@calm-and-doctor @destiny-tsukino @safertokiss

Sub Spencer

@thatsonezesty13 @pastathighs @virtualpeanutartisanjudge

#spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid smut #spencer reid fanfic #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds #criminal minds smut #matthew gray gubler #matthew gray gubler x reader #matthew gray gubler smut #750 follower celebration #750 followers

523 notes · View notes

queen0fm0nsterz · 4 years ago

Note

Please please please I wanna see your opinions on the Lady I loved reading your tags

I don't know if you meant for the character thing I just reblogged or in general so I'm gonna use the character thing to dump my Lady thoughts on all of you JAKDKSLDKDLNAKDKSKS LETS GO

favorite thing about them: SO MANY THING UGHHSNDND. Ok lets start with the fact that her design is perfect like... milady (wlw) (gender envy) JWKEKKK No ok but going back to being serious.

I noticed that all the different Lady statues you have to find in the DLC all wear a different colors and since I'm very interested in color coded characters I got curious. Basically what I found out is that her dress is a darker shade of the Tangerine color, which is associated with Beauty, Vigilance, Strenght, Dedication and Willpower to name a few, which ... if they did that on purpose, which I'm sure they did. Well played. Clever.

I've already talked about the symbolism behind the Rascal mask so I won't get into it here, but I love that too.

I also love the fact that she floats most of the time. And that shes 2 meters tall? That's terrifying. In an irl setting I would barely reach her shoulder. Lastly, her voice - it's hauntingly beautiful.

least favorite thing about them: I was about to say the way she keeps her quarters but then I remembered these UGLY ASS DOLLS

WHY. LITERALLY WHY DO THEY HAVE TO BE SO UGLY😭

favorite line: I'd say her singing but you know what? I like feral Lady more.

The sound she makes when going after Six in the dark mannequin room? Masterpiece. Mwa. Perfection. Absolutely stunning.

brOTP: Well, her and all the workers on the Maw, but mostly HER👏AND👏ROGER👏 I WILL NEVER SHUT IP ABOUT THEM OMG.

The concept of a mean tall woman who's insicure about her looks and a nice short blind man being besties is literally perfect to me. I have an headcanon that she left him to take care of the children because he's the one she trusts the most.

Also look at this cute ass tapestry you can find in Roger's bedroom and the Lady's personal elevator🥺

It looks like they're holding hands please😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 im gonna cry what the fuck,,, this is supposed to be an horror game who allowed this????

ALSO THE LADY AND THE CHEFS. This is so weird to me bc I never really considered it until I realized how many paintings of them the has laying around her quarters??? Including their baby pictures.

(I mean, I assumed those are their baby pictures. One of the chefs does have blueish skin under the mask.)

The theory that the chefs were born on the Maw is actually really funny if you think the Lady saw these babies and though "mghnnghh yes sons" and kept them. Love the concept though. NOW I THOUGHT ABOUT ONE OF THE CHEFS CALLING HER " MA' " BY ACCIDENT AUHEJSKRLSOFOPF

OTP: Her and the Thin Man💔 The drama, the pain, the untold words... and the clonwery bc can you imagine if they're not connected at all?? All of us be like 🤡 UWUSAUSJAKDKS No but they are connected. They are.

Still, I also like their individual characters. They go well together, but I appreciate them by themselves as well - which is what makes the ship interesting to me, because I'm interested in both characters as individuals.

now who wants me to drop the songs i cry to while drawing fanarts of them

NOTP: Eh, none?

unpopular opinion: I don't personally believe in the "Six is the Lady" theory, but I can see why so many do. The two are definetely deeply connected.

random headcanon: She wrote a book about her life on the Maw at some point, probably as a commercial move to have more people coming on the Maw and also to get that coin. Good for her.

This isn't even an headcanon I literally just saw a book with her mask on it in the Residence and just assumed what was inside.

song I associate with them: TO NAME A FEW.

"Ship in a Bottle" - Steffan Argus

"Liar" - The Arcadian Wild

"Body" - Mother Mother

favorite picture of them:

Couldn't pick between these two! I love the comics sm😩🤚

#little nightmares #the lady #little nightmares 2 #ln the lady #ln meta #{¿¿¿KINDA???????}#the janitor #the chefs #roger #the thin man #six #ln six #ln the janitor #ln the chefs #ln the thin man #ln thin man

117 notes · View notes

just-another-obsessed-fangirl · 4 years ago

Text

slow motion, double vision in rose blush (Renora College AU)

Summary: Ren doesn't need alcohol to know how gorgeous his best friend is or to admit to himself (kind of, sort of) that his feelings towards her aren't exactly platonic. Apparently, he just needs it if he wants to be unable to ignore those facts.

Warnings: Drinking alcohol, some suggestive thoughts

Fic under the read more or can be read on AO3 here

I wrote this for Flower Power Week, but I didn’t see that there was a rule to keep works PG-13 until I was almost finished with this fic, and I figure this fic is already inherently a bit more mature than that, so I don’t think I should use the tag or tag the blog.

Hope you enjoy!

Parties wouldn't really be considered Ren's "thing".

He much prefers the slightly-hectic-but-relatively-calm get-togethers of his friends that they manage to schedule every week or so amongst all their university classes. But it was the end of some particularly grueling midterms and everyone in their little friend group (and apparently, everyone on campus) had wanted to let loose and let wild after being cooped up with only their textbooks and their stress for so long. So that, and not enough displeasure at the plan to do anything about it, is how Ren ended up in the corner of the front room of some frat house with a red Solo cup in his hand.

He doesn't know where most of his friends have gone. Ren hasn't seen all of them in one place since basically when they first arrived and Yang had shoved shots of - Ren hasn't drunk enough alcohol in his life to know for sure, but he would assume it's whiskey - into each of their hands. He didn't have much desire to down it in one go like most of the group, would rather let its burn come in little bursts than have all of the pain all at once. By the time he had finished it, Yang had taken Blake somewhere promising to dance, Ruby heard a rumor of a ping pong table and had set off to find it with Weiss so they can challenge each other, and Jaune and Pyrrha went… somewhere. The only friend who hadn't wandered off was Nora, who immediately upon finishing her shot had started pouring ice, orange juice, and maybe a tad too much vodka into a Solo cup.

She had immediately come back to his side, expressing how much this was needed for her after midterms. Nora then starts rambling about what lengths she had gone to in order to make the information stick and the stomach aches she got from the stress and how she was shaking during her last test partly from how little sleep she had gotten in the past month from projects. At least, that's what Ren was pretty sure she was talking about. The music was so loud that he had to lean in pretty close to hear what Nora was saying, and even then he couldn't pick up half the words said. Which was a shame, because as much as people seem to believe he just ignores her, Ren does listen to everything his best friend wants to say, and he likes listening to everything she says.

Nora must've noticed how close Ren was leaning in, or his discomfort at the loud music, as she then grabs his hand and walks them somewhere else, still talking all the while. The farther they walk, the quieter the music gets, the more Ren can hear Nora. They arrive at some far-off corner and Ren is more than content to stay there and listen to Nora for the rest of the night. But then a girl dressed more like she was going to a full-out rave rather than a college party rushes up to Nora and begs her to be her partner at beer pong.

"Kobalt and Ivori are ‘too cool’ for it, and Flynt's our DD, so obviously he can't drink, and you're fun enough and I bet you'd be super good at beer pong-"

Ren can tell Nora wants to say yes, but she keeps looking at him from the corner of her eye like she doesn't want to leave him alone. If he really had heard her correctly, then she is certainly deserving of some fun right now, and it might be a little awkward standing here alone but it wouldn't be the worst thing.

"You should go," he says.

Nora turns her head fully to him. "Are you sure? You gonna be okay here all by your lonesome?"

Ren gives her a little smile. "I think I can manage."

"Great!" the girl says with a clap of her hands. "So it's settled". She grabs the cup that Nora was holding and hands it off to Ren. "Now be a good boyfriend and keep this safe for her."

Nora's face flushes, and Ren can feel that he does too. "Oh no, Neon, we're not-" but before she can continue her denial, Neon yanks her away to the beer pong table.

They're a little ways away, but they are perfectly within Ren's eyesight. He can see that they're playing against Sun and Neptune. He doesn't know them too well but he hasn't known them as anything other than friendly. Well, Jaune might disagree at least where Neptune's concerned, but it's been ages and he's since got over his crush on Weiss, so he's probably okay with him now. They start their game and on her first try, Nora lands the ball cleanly into one of the other team's cups. She jumps and pumps her fist in the air, showing off that usual bright beautiful smile in her joy that always seems to lighten up every room and flood Ren's insides with warmth.

He looks away a little, not wanting to acknowledge what that feeling really meant, even if he had finally admitted to himself that what he had felt for his best friend wasn’t exactly platonic. The admission itself is a barely-there kind of thing because no matter how much Ren would prefer it, he couldn't be in complete denial over it for the rest of time so he'll just settle for being as close to that as possible. Nora's his best friend, what they've had since they were kids - it's good. For the most part, he's completely fine with the way things are and Nora seems to also so why potentially ruin or try to change something that's practically perfect already? Before he could uncomfortably spiral into that thought process anymore, mercifully, he is interrupted. But not so mercifully, that interruption is from Nora, laughing so loud and wonderfully that Ren just plummets even deeper.

Something funny must have happened. Or maybe not. It doesn't seem to take much to send Nora into a fit of laughter. He likes that about her, that she can let joy or other emotions in so easily and that she doesn't really care about how it may look or what others might think. He's glad there isn't some insecurity that keeps Nora from laughing so often. She has such a nice laugh and Ren likes knowing she's happy and it's nice that she does it so much. And her lips are so pretty, especially when she smiles. He can't help but keep his focus on them. That is until she throws her head back, showing off the nice smooth skin of her neck. Ren then starts to wonder what it would be like to press his lips to the side of it and just how she'd react before he realizes the nature of just what exactly he's thinking.

His mouth goes dry. Without thinking, he raises Nora's cup to his lips to make it go away but it isn't until he's already swallowed and surprised himself with the hefty burn it leaves in his throat that he remembers what was in that cup. Yeah, he definitely took a much bigger sip than he should've, and there is definitely too much vodka in that. But the orange juice masks the taste of it for the most part and the ice soothes away a good amount of the burn, so it's definitely not the worst alcoholic drink Ren's ever had and might actually be one of the more pleasant ones. He takes a smaller sip of it out of a measured curiosity.

Ren's eyes drift back to Nora. If he had any sense left in him, he'd focus on anything else, keep trying to avoid feelings he doesn't want to feel and thoughts that might be inappropriate, or definitely inappropriate. But it's as if Ren's field of vision can only narrow down to just her. There are clouds of pink on the edges of what he can see, threatening to fill up the entire room, and it seems as if the only way it won't happen is if he keeps Nora right in the center, where all her movements seem to be in slow motion.

She picked a green top tonight, a color more associated with Ren more than Nora. She bears a little more skin in this top too, the two spaghetti straps unable to hide the nice, toned muscles of Nora's arms and shoulders along with her delicate collarbone. Ren had already noticed this top when everyone was on the way to the party, trying to figure out if it was new as he's pretty sure he had never seen it before. He must've been more obvious than he should've, because Pyrrha had nudged his shoulder then, giving him a coy little smile. "Green's a good color on Nora, isn't it?" Pyrrha had said, as if he hadn't already known that. Nora doesn't have a lot of green in her own wardrobe, but Ren does, and the times when she has worn the color were usually because she was wearing his clothes. She's done it often enough - stolen his sweater to fight the cold in the café while they were studying, hung his jacket from her shoulders walking around town, switched into one of his tees and sweats when she needed to crash at his dorm for one reason or another. It always feels nice seeing Nora in green, especially when it's his green. Ren would let Nora borrow his clothes any time just to see it more often.

Nora's skirt is still her signature pink, but without the usual volume or swish ability that she loves so much. No, this skirt is… tighter. It clings to the shape of her quite well, accentuating her curves very nicely. She's doing a little dance right now, and it looks like she's singing too. Nora's a really good singer when she wants to be but he can't imagine she's deciding to be that right now. She bumps her hip against Neon's and spins around, does some shimmying movement. Ren's mouth goes dry again. He's starting to feel really warm. He should look away. Nora's his best friend. He shouldn't be getting mesmerized by the movement of her hips or tracing his eyes over the muscles of her arms, or even noticing how her outfit and especially that skirt, while she’s dancing, makes certain areas of Nora more prominent and - okay Ren's taking another drink. He's taking another drink because he needs another drink, because he needs to stop ogling Nora and thinking these kinds of thoughts about her.

The burn hurts. It's a deserved punishment.

He's a little woozy right now but he still feels guilty. Nora is beautiful. She's always been beautiful. Ren has known that even before realizing he liked her in that way. But that doesn't give him or anybody else the right to objectify her like that. It's obviously not like her being gorgeous is the only thing to Nora, and neither that nor the idea of them being physical together are why Ren fell in love with her in the first place.

Love.

Well, that is… definitely true. It's definitely true but Ren doesn't think he's ever admitted that much to himself before. In fact, he knows he hasn't because emotions are uncomfortable and scary and often irrational and he doesn't like dealing with them especially when it could ruin probably the most important relationship he has. Why did he have to realize this now? Why did he have to realize this at all? This is uncomfortable. He might be panicking. He feels off balance. Ren takes another drink just so that he can distract himself from all of this but it doesn't quite work by the time he's finished off the rest of it.

There's nothing of this too-much-vodka concoction left and it is immediately apparent to Ren that that was not his brightest idea. He doesn't really drink too much, even at social gatherings. Their friends usually appoint him the designated driver, and he doesn't mind. If he does drink, he'll usually stop by the time he feels a hint of a buzz. This was… more than a hint. He's more off-balance than before, the room sways a little more and he thinks it's grown even pinker. His head feels cloudy. And this is the longest a burn has stayed in his throat. And he is so warm. Ren leans his back against the wall for some stability.

His eyes come back to Nora because if Ren couldn't stop it before, he can't stop it now. She's still there, being beautiful and charming and full of life, laughing with the people around her, and of course Ren is in love with her, how could he ever try to deny that fact. Neptune comes up to her, leans in kind of close to say something. Ren doesn't like that, or the way he's looking at Nora. Maybe Jaune was right about him. Maybe the problem with Neptune is that he's too friendly. Neptune points his thumb somewhere and - wait, is he pointing at him? He must have because Nora immediately turns her head and catches Ren's eye. There's some expression on her face and she immediately sets off in his direction.

There's something in Ren that tells him to act casual and he raises the cup to his lips one more time but is immediately reminded of the fact that there's nothing left in it so he figures he just looks stupid.

"Hey," Nora says as she stops in front of him. "You okay?"

Ren looks up from his empty cup and pushes himself off the wall. He probably used a lot more force than he should've and stumbles a bit, which Nora remedies by putting her hands on his shoulders. She laughs a little, and he can't help but feel even warmer.

"Guess that answers my question," Nora giggles some more.

"I'm fine," Ren says. He is very aware of how her fingers are splayed out on his shoulders, the pressure she's putting that's just enough to still him. It keeps him calm, but also doesn't, and his heart is beating so hard she must feel it where her hands are.

Her eyes scan over his face. "I've never seen your face so red." Ren's sure it only gets redder then. "How much have you had to drink?"

He wordlessly brings his attention back to the empty cup in his hand, which Nora follows. "You drank all of it?" she points at the cup, her eyes widening. "Ren, I put a lot of vodka in that!"

Ren blinks a couple times, having to more manually process what Nora said while he was trying not to stare at her mouth. "I can tell," he says, maybe a couple of seconds too late.

Nora raises an eyebrow. It's another cute look on her. "You don't really drink that much. There a reason why now?"

There's genuine concern in her voice when she asks that question, and it's so sweet and Ren's heart beats a little faster and he wants to take that concern away from her. But he doesn't think answering that question truthfully is going to help that. Ren's pretty sure the best-case scenario of saying 'you're pretty and I love you' to Nora is causing her confusion to the point of distortion.

"I was… thirsty." And that's really about as close to the truth as he can get. Ren shakes his head, but not too hard because the room is moving too much already and… ouch. "I'm sure you've had more tonight," nodding towards the beer pong table. She must've, shouldn't she? Is it just his alcohol-addled mind or does Nora not seem any bit of drunk at all?

She scoffs. "Maybe not. Sun really doesn't like putting too much beer in those cups. Besides, that's beer, not hard liquor. And I'm more experienced with it than you, so it takes a bit more to get me down. I've had more practice."

Nora shoots him a cheeky grin, a little closer to his face than she was before. She leaned in a bit when she was talking, migrated her hands closer to the base of his neck. It's nothing new. Nora being so physically affectionate is one of her trademark qualities. And Ren's happy to let her do that to him at any time, but he knows he generally seems unresponsive to it. But what if he responds to it now? He's not going to, he's absolutely not going to, but it's easier to fall into that daydream than usual. Ren could wrap his hands around Nora's waist, lean into this little space between them to ultimately close it. He could press his lips to that grin on her face, and Nora would be a little surprised, but in no time at all, she'd be kissing him back. She'd wrap her arms a little easier around his neck and she could press herself a little more against him, the idea of having any distance left between them as unappealing to Nora as it is to Ren.

"Uhh, Ren?"

He falls out of the daydream. "Oh! Ah… umm… huh?" She hasn't been saying anything. Ren has been very focused on Nora's mouth for the past couple of minutes, so much that he had missed the blush on her face. He must've missed something happening. Did he say something? The thought of that mortifies him to no end.

He might've been emoting his thought process on his face because Nora chuckles. "Yeah. That's definitely more alcohol than you're used to." She grabs his hand and leads him over to a couch nearby. Nora lightly pushes him down next to the armrest. "You stay right here," she says firmly, but full of fondness. "I'm gonna get you some water. And I probably need some too." Nora pats his cheek a little, brushes it with her thumb. Ren almost leans into it but she pulls away too soon.

Nora turns around and goes in search of some water, and characteristically of him tonight, Ren can't help but keep her eyes on her, until he's forced to because there are too many people in that direction. He sighs, sinking into the cushions as he closes his eyes, feeling the warmth bloom in his chest. She's just so caring. Nora is just so caring and she loves people so much. And she's not afraid to give away all that love and care, to allow people to really see that that's what she feels for them, does it without a second thought. That's one of the big things, Ren thinks. That's got to be at least one of the big reasons why he fell in love with Nora.

She comes back to him with two large water bottles in her hands. Nora tucks one under her arm in order to open the other, which she gives to him. Ren takes it and continues watching Nora as she settles right next to him, sitting down then kicking her legs up onto the couch. She leans back into the cushions and shifts herself more towards him, letting her head rest closer to his shoulder. Nora moves her head a bit to drink some water and then it actually touches his shoulder. Ren loves her so much. Moments like these are so small, and it's not like they don't happen between them very much. But maybe one day Ren will be brave enough to let them happen a lot more often, and those moments will have a slightly different meaning between the two of them than it does now.

She looks so pretty in this light. Nora looks pretty in any light.

Nora catches his eye again. She pushes her hand up beneath the water bottle Ren had forgotten that he was holding. "Drink up."

And who is Ren to refuse her? He starts to sip his first non-alcoholic drink of the night and already his head is starting to feel less like it's filled with cotton. He drinks until the room feels still again, until everything stops looking like it's in slow motion, until there's no more pink clouds on the edges of his vision. Before he knows it, Ren's finished the whole bottle and his throat feels the best it's been all night.

Despite the lack of pink clouds and an apparent increase in sobriety, Ren still keeps looking at Nora. She's giggling now. He doesn't know what exactly is so funny but that doesn't really matter.

"Feel better now?" She asks. He nods because he doesn't know just what he'll admit to her right now if he allows himself to speak. "Great. I'm glad they set out those really big water bottles. That really saved me another trip. And you probably didn't drink enough that you'd need ibuprofen or something. I would've said to take some just in case, but I'm not sure what taking meds when something isn't really wrong with you could do to you. I think you should be fine now. Don't think you'll wake up in the morning with a hangover."

Ren just keeps looking at Nora, without a word. He doesn't need them right now. He doesn't think he needs to do anything else besides look at Nora and hear her talk for the rest of time.

But something must be wrong because Nora turns her head away a little, shrinking a bit into herself. "Are you mad at me?"

That surprises him. "No," that is very much not what he was feeling towards Nora right now. "Why would you think that?"

She heaves out a heavy sigh. "Neptune said you were staring at me the whole time we were playing." Ren's heart stops a little. Nora keeps shrinking down and her voice feels smaller. "I don't know- I just figured you might be angry at me for leaving you alone at a place I know you'd rather not be."

Ren straightens up, shifts fully towards her so she can more easily believe what he's about to say. "I told you to go," maybe he's leaning more forward than he usually would, makes more direct eye contact with Nora. "And being here isn't too bad. I just- uh- I uh-" He puts his head down a little, taking some time to find the right words. How does Ren explain the staring? That he just loves the way she exists and who she is and she deserves good times and it's nice when she gets them?

"You were having fun," Ren brings himself to look back at her, says these words in all earnest. "I like when you have fun."

That takes her back a little. Nora's eyes widen but her face softens. For one terrifying but almost hopeful moment, Ren thinks she might've understood what he really meant underneath those words. She smiles and brings her hand up to his face. She uses a couple fingers to sweep his bangs to the side. Ren's eyes almost close at the contact.

"You're so sweet," Nora says, almost like she's in disbelief. "You wanna go back home? I can walk you back."

"Are you sure?" That does sound like a good idea to Ren, but he doesn't want to take Nora away from something she enjoys just for him. "I'm honestly fine here. I know you were really stressed, I don't mind if you wanna unwind a little more."

Nora smiles a little wider. "I think I've had a good amount of unwinding here already. If I stay here any longer and leave you unattended, who knows how many more screwdrivers you'll drink." She moves her hand from his forehead down to his cheek. "And you need to get home safe. For the most part, you seem all right now, but I just… I need to make sure."

Ren leans into the hand Nora has on his cheek. It's a bit more than he'd usually do, but it feels right. "Alright then."

"Can I crash at yours' too?" she asks. Ren chuckles a little at that, because when has Nora ever needed to ask that.

"Of course." And then some daydream starts again. They get back to his single dorm and it'll be just like the other times Nora's slept over there. She'll switch tonight's outfit out for some of Ren's pajamas and she'll look just as good, if not better to Ren. They'll lay down and fall asleep in his bed, and that's all they'll do tonight. And then the morning comes and there's no trace of alcohol in their systems and everything's in the clear, and Ren will kiss her, soft and sweet. Nora will kiss him back because she has wanted this just as much as he has. He'll keep a hand on her cheek and maybe she'll tangle her fingers in his hair. Then maybe they end up never leaving the dorm that day, or even the bed. They'll talk, of course. They'll say what needs to be said, about their feelings and anything else. It's decided between them that Nora can sleep at his dorm a lot more often. And when she does, they don't need to struggle as much to fit together on this twin size XL bed, because Ren can wrap himself around her and they can let their legs get tangled together. He can wake up and bury his head into the hollow of Nora's shoulder and just breathe her in. The next time they see their friends, Ren and Nora won't act all that much different, but it won't take long before they realize something's up. They'll get it out of them, and they'll be happy, and then they'll be mercilessly teased because how did it take you two this long? Ren will get a bit embarrassed, but Nora will take it in stride. She'll kiss the blush on his face, and he'll just blush harder, and she'll laugh a little until he does too.

But Nora in this reality grabs his hand and forces him to stand. He doesn't know if it's just how much he was in that daydream or if he's still a little buzzed from the alcohol, but it's a little disorienting as he makes movements.

Before he knows it, they're out the front door and into the cold night air. It's a little windy out. Ren wishes he had a jacket to give to Nora.

They walk at a leisurely pace in the direction of his dorm. Their hands are still intertwined, their arms swinging in between them. They don't speak, not uncommon at all for Ren but a little surprising from Nora. Ren might've wondered at this if we weren’t lost in his own thoughts.

How close is that daydream to reality? How close could that daydream be to becoming reality? Is it just Ren or are there enough pieces in place for that to happen? All this time he's been worried about losing their friendship, what they already have. But what kind of future could they have? What could they gain? Is all that Ren really needs to do is get over himself?

Maybe he's still not in his right mind. It certainly can't be that easy. But he can recall a few times when he's caught Nora looking at him. And maybe some of the comments she's passed off as jokes had more truth to them than she lets on.

Everything about this still feels scary, but not as scary as it was before. He is at least very lucky to fall in love with such an incredible, amazing woman who's already his best friend. He doesn't know what will happen, but he does know what could. And yes, that may include losing the person closest to him. But as devastating as that is, there's another possibility that is at least that amount of wonderful.

He peers at Nora from the corner of his eye. She's tucking some hair behind her ear to keep it from flapping in the breeze. Her hand is so warm in his.

Ren's not going to do anything like confess to her tonight. Or the next morning. But looking at Nora, and holding her hand, and thinking about the good possibilities - he thinks he's starting to build up the courage.

#renora #nora valkyrie #lie ren #rwby #my fics #I FINISHED WRITING A FIC FOR THE FIRST TIME IN ALMOST 3 YEARS #I LOVE THIS SHIP SO MUCH #i finally did my all lowercase tswift lyric title fic for this ship #fanfiction

28 notes · View notes

bamsywrites · 4 years ago

Text

Mistakes Like These

Summary: Kakyoin never paid much attention to the younger Kujo. Who knew stockings and short skirt were all it would take change that

Rating: 18+, nsfw

Words: 4877

Warnings: cannabis mention, alcohol use

Tags: afab, fem pronouns, modern!au , doesn’t follow the canon like at all, very au, brother!jotaro x sister!reader, kakyoin x reader, soft dom kak, lots of pet names, plus size reader

Notes: I haven’t written any fanfiction in over five years so this might be rusty. I’m sorry for any mistakes made or if its not how the characters would act. I’m still new to the Jojos fandom but had this idea pop in my head and decided to get it out. I want to turn this in to a multi part story and have several parts already planned out, I just want to have feedback to see if people actually like it.

“Have a happy Holidays. Make sure to check in with your financial advisor about the spring semester.”

A sigh escaped your lips as you read the most recent email in your student inbox. Patience may be a virtue, but it was sure one you didn’t possess. At least not right now anyway. Tsking your tongue against the roof of your mouth, you moved the mouse over to the refresh button and clicked. Your eyes followed the downloading icon in circles, fingers tapping anxiously over the desk.

“Have a happy Holidays. Make sure to check in with your financial advisor about the spring semester.”

You exhaled angrily through your nose and leaned back in your chair. Your eyes fixed on the ceiling for a few moments before you looked over to your bed where your cat, Miso, had woken up from his nap.

“I know I should be more patient. But this grade is what determines if I move on to the next course which I need if I want to graduate soon and get out of this apartment.” You spoke as if your cat had scolded you for your impatience.

Your apartment was nice. Super nice. Your friends often described it as “apartment goals.” You could have never afforded it on your own. Hell, you couldn’t afford it even when you graduated and got a job. Two large bedrooms with a spacious living room, modern kitchen, and a balcony that overlooked the cities skyline. There were only two major downsides: there was only one bathroom which had to be shared with your roommate and your roommate happened to be your older brother, Jotaro.

Now, you didn’t exactly hate your brother. He was like any older brother, he thought you were extremely annoying and wanted nothing to do with you most of the time, though there were times growing up where he’d come home with scrapes and bruises after dealing with someone who picked on you at school. As you were both older, you found each other more bearable than you did when you were younger. That didn’t mean, however, you wanted to live with him. Especially while you were in college, which was supposed to be your time to let loose and have fun while still receiving an education, of course. Your grandfather, however, had other plans.

Joseph Joestar was a real estate mogul and had some serious money to his name. He loved to dote on his two grandchildren and was upset that for the most part your parents chose to give you a “normal” life without the extravagance that he offered. Birthdays and christmas he would buy you each a present, until Jotaro turned 15 and started asking for money instead. He made your mother an offer that he knew she couldn’t deny: he would pay for the entirety of your schooling, from associates degree to PhD if thats what you wanted, in order for the two of you to focus on your studies he’d also give you a weekly allowance so that you wouldn’t have to work, and he’d buy you each your own apartment and pay to furnish it how you liked. Holly couldn’t turn down the offer, what kind of mother would deny her children an opportunity like that? However, she did ask that her father only buy a single apartment for her children to share. Her hopes were that it would strengthen your relationship and it also meant she could see both her darling children whenever she desired.

You didn’t want to seem ungrateful at all for what Jiji had done for you. You knew you were extremely privileged to have the opportunities that he provided you but, fuck, sometimes you wished you had your own place. You wanted the independence, to know you earned something but also because sharing a bathroom with Jojo was infuriating. He always moved your stuff, never cleaned the shower, and he never had patience for you to get ready in the mornings. A wishful sigh left your lips as you thought of your future, with just you, Miso, and the ability to use the bathroom whenever you wanted.

Your eyes moved back to the computer screen, clicking refresh, and rolling your eyes when you read the same email from the dean again. Like you expected anything different, you just turned the term paper in yesterday. You brought your cup of tea up to your lips but furrowed your eyebrows when you realized there was none left.

Pushing yourself up out of your chair you formulated a plan for the rest of your evening. You would refill your cup of tea, hop back on your computer to play Overwatch with your friends until the early hours of the morning, and then cuddle up with Miso and look at TikToks until you fell asleep. It was foolproof. No way that you would even think about your term paper grade.

And if you did, you could always refresh your email in between matches.

-----------

Your finger tapped your lip as you looked over all the snack foods in the pantry. While waiting for your tea, you realized that the only thing that could make your plan better was a good snack. You had just gone shopping so it meant that all the poky, ramen, and chips you desired were on the shelves and it made the decision extra hard.

In the middle of your contemplation, you heard the front door turn and the sound of your brother and his friends entering the apartment.

“You know it's true, Jotaro. Your apartments bigger. Its nicer. It has that view that drives the ladies wild. Our apartment is cramped and it smells like weed.” Polnareff’s voice was the first you heard as the trio entered the house.

“Don’t forget the upstairs neighbors who are always playing loud polish music.” Kakyoin added, plopping down to sit on one of the chairs in the living room.

You heard your brother sigh and could feel his annoyance. You never understood how the trio became friends, it was a mystery to everyone including them but they had been together since their days in primary school and the bond they shared was one that intrigued you.

“Yes, yes. The polish,” Polnareff nodded. “Known around the world for their ability to ruin the mood with a hurdy-gurdy.”

There was silence, and you could tell your brother was not budging a bit. A party was not Jotaros thing. Kakyoin wasn’t a partier either, from what you gathered he’d much rather stay at home playing video games and smoking weed. Sucking your bottom lip in your mouth, you made your decision, grabbing a bag of chips and a box of strawberry pocky. You did your best to hold those in one hand and your cup of tea in the other.

“Feel that Christmas spirit, Jo. Help Pol in his never ending crusade to get laid. The poorman is gonna end this year with, what, a batting average of zero. He’ll be a disgrace to French men everywhere.” The teasing tone Kakyoins voice almost made you laugh.

“Hey! Batting average of 3. You know this,” Polnareff shot back, causing his roommate to throw his hands up in mock surrender.

“Jotaro,” The french man turned his attention back to your brother, who simply turned on the TV in what seemed to be an attempt to drown out the sound of his friend's voice, “C’mon. I’ll buy your cigarettes for a month…..Two months?” His voice was getting more desperate, his head turned toward you. A smile stretched across his features as he jumped off the couch and threw his arms around your shoulder.

God, you just wanted to go to your room.

“New deal,” Polernaff declared, squeezing you to the side of his body as you tried not to splash your tea all over the floor. Kakyoin looked away from the TV, eyebrow raised, Jotaros attention never faltered from the knock-off Viagra commercial. “If you agree to a Christmas Eve party I will buy you cigarettes for three months, I will never ask anything of you ever again, and I will stop flirting with your sister.”

Kakyoin snorted, shaking his head and turning his attention to Jotaro. Since you had moved in with Jotaro, the frenchman hadn’t stopped making comments about how beautiful he thought you were or just giving you flirty winks whenever you walked through the room. You found it annoying at first, but you quickly got over it when you realized he did the same thing with every girl, and boy, that he saw.

“Good grief,” Jotaro sighed. “Its a deal.”

------------------

“I can’t believe you agreed to this.” Kakyoin mumbled as he and Jotaro watched their friend place the final touches on the decorations and food for the party. Y/N had already put up Christmas decorations earlier that month, there was some snowmen set out on the dining table and a cute tree with some presents neatly wrapped under it. However, Polnareff had decided that wasn’t enough. He had hung up snowflakes to come down from the ceiling, there was garland hung on every wall, and so much fucking mistletoe.

Polnareff had even requested that his friends dress festive. Jotaro, of course, didn’t listen and wore what he always wore. Kakyoin decided to humor his friend and wore a Santa hat along with a dark green v-neck and dark wash jeans.

“You don’t need the money, right? Grandpa Joestar’s allowance has to be enough for cigarettes.” He continued, watching his roommate place a bowl of peppermints by the door.

“I just wanted to get him to shut up,” Jotaro said with a roll of his eyes.

“You think he’ll actually follow through on leaving Y/N alone?”

Jotaro shook his head, “Out of all the people in this city, you’d think he’d leave the only one of limits alone.”

Kakyoin simply nodded, taking a sip of his drink.

-----------

You smoothed your hands over your outfit, turning to the side to get it from a different angle. You couldn’t decide if you liked it or not. The sweater was cute, it was red with a deep green christmas tree that had colorful little puff balls as the ornaments. Your make-up and hair looked nice, too. That wasn’t what concerned you. It was the white pleated skirt and tight red stockings that caused you pause. You grabbed at your love handles that spilled over the top of the skirt a bit and your eyes traveled to how your thighs looked in the stockings.

Polnareff had told you you could invite some friends over. Which, of course you could, this was your apartment and you didn’t need his permission. You had told him as such and invited over your three closest friends.

You turned around to your bed and looked at Miso, who was comfortably curled up. “How do I look?” You waited a moment before turning back to the mirror and smacking your lips together. You were tempted to take off the skirt and tights and throw a pair of jeans on but something changed your mind last minute. Instead of heading to your closet to change, you instead grabbed the reindeer antler hand band and slipped it on top of your hair before heading out of the safety of your bedroom.

You were so distracted with the new decorations that you didn’t notice the pair of eyes that were glued to your form.

------

Simply Having a Wonderful Christmastime was playing for what seemed like the fifth time. Kakyoin had never hated Paul McCartney more than he did now. He was just now starting to feel the buzz of all the drinks he had had but it didn’t make the party any more bearable.

“She,” Kakyoin pointed to a blonde girl in a Santa dress, “is gonna hook up with him,” He pointed to a dark haired main that had for some reason felt the need to take his shirt off.

Jotaro simply grunted before eyeing more of the members of the party. This was a game they’d been playing for the past hour and a half, making bets on who was gonna hook up with who and who was gonna get the most shit faced.

“He’s gonna end up passed out in my bathtub,” The dark haired man stated, pointing to the only person dancing to the playlist Polnareff had created.

Kakyoin broke a smile as he watched the clearly wasted man's horrible dance moves. His attention was brought away from the scene by the sound of Y/N’s laugh. For what had to be the millionth time that night, the red haired man eyed her up and down. That outfit looked so fucking good on her but the smile streched out across her lips looked even better.

I wonder what the lipstick would look like smeared on my cock.

The thought slipped into his head and he couldn’t stop from staring at the red painted on your lips.

Does she feel as soft as she looks?

He took a sip from his cup. He knew he shouldn’t be thinking about his hands running over her thighs or his fingers digging into her hips. It was strange that he was having these thoughts. He’d never viewed Y/N as more than just Jotaro’s younger sister. He never thought she was ugly, in fact there were multiple times that he thought she was down right gorgeous but it had never turned sexual. Something about that outfit had sent him over that edge.

The sound of Last Christmas brought him out of his trance. Kakyoin almost immediately rolled his eyes. He almost missed the hurdy-gurdy.

“Good grief,” Jotaro mumbled and grabbed the pack of cigarettes off the coffee table. “I’m heading out for a smoke.”

Kakyoin watched as his best friend got up but instead of heading for the balcony, Jotaro went out the front door. The red haired man was tempted to follow but as soon as that thought popped into his mind he heard the drunk voice of his other best friend call to him.

“Kak, you gotta show these guys the cherry thing!”

---------

It was well past 3. The party had ended and most of the attendants took an Uber home. The only people in the apartment were you, Polnareff, and Kakyoin. Jotaro had still not returned from that smoke he said he was going to take hours ago. The buzz had long worn off and the reality sank in that you had to clean the disaster of an apartment that was left in the christmas party’s wake.

There were red solo cups strewn about various surfaces and all over the floor, glitter seemed to have gotten everywhere, there were plates of food left half eaten, and there was a candy cane just stuck to the wall. Looking at the destruction, you almost wondered if the fun you had had was worth it. With your parents coming over tomorrow...or, well, today…..for Christmas, you had really no other option than to clean it, with that thought in your head you grabbed a garbage bag and started cleaning.

After a few minutes, you heard the familiar rustle of plastic as someone was opening a trash bag and you turned to see Kakyoin helping you with your task.

“Thanks,” You told him as you threw a plate of half eaten cake into the bag.

“No problem. Pol is passed out in the hallway and I gotta make sure Jo makes it home safe, so I’m kinda stuck here.”

You simply nodded in response and kept about your task in silence. A silence which seemingly bothered Kakyoin because a few minutes later he cleared his throat and broke the silence.

“So I, uh, noticed your man wasn’t here tonight.” He almost smacked himself for asking the question. You thought he was just making small talk, the thought of him having more devious reasons behind asking if you were single hadn’t crossed your mind.

“My….My man?” You quirked an eyebrow, looking back over your shoulder at him.

“Yeah, your man. I saw you with some guy a while back,” Kakyoin had put down the now full trash bag and was leaning against the counter top with his arms crossed as he spoke.

“Oh,” You suddenly realized who exactly he was talking about, “Yeah, um, we broke up six months ago,” You said with a laugh.

“Oh...Six months?” He titled his head to the side, “Are you sure? Hmm… Well, sorry I didn’t notice...I uh guess I should be more observant.

You shook your head, placing down your own bag and heading past him to the pantry to grab another. “Its alright, I’m not offended. I’m sure you find me as annoying as I find Jotaros friends.”

Kakyoin raised his eyebrows at your statement, “You find me annoying? I mean, Pol, I get. Yeah. He’s one of my closest friends and even I can’t handle him sometimes. But me? I never talk to you.”

You had busied yourself with cleaning the rest of the cups off the counter, “ I don’t know. You’re just…” You looked up and noticed his eyes quickly flick down to your lips before making eye contact with you again. “I mean, you did one time give me oregano and told me it was weed.”

“First,” Kakyoin started, his body shifted so it was turned toward you, “Thats not annoying. I would call that immature, maybe. But annoying? Nah. Second,” he threw up two fingers to emphasize his point, “ In my defense, you were 15 and I was worried about you finding our stash under Jo’s bed and I thought it would lessen that chance if I gave you your own stash.”

You laughed, setting the bag down and turning to look at him. You couldn’t help but notice how good he looked in that dark green shirt but you quickly willed that thought away. “Kakyoin, that doesn’t make any sense.”

“Hey, at the time it did.”

You tilted your head to the side, you had plenty of stories that you could use as proof that he was annoying, “ What about that time you and Jojo left me stranded at school because the new playstation came out?”

“Thats not fair,” He noticed the playful hint your voice was taking and it caused a small smile to tug at his lips.

“How about the time that you threw up in my make up bag?”

“Hey, that was all Frenchie. Not me.”

“Or…..” You were silenced by Kakyoin pressing a finger to your lips. You hadn’t noticed that the two of you had just kept moving closer and closer as you were talking. You could get a better look at him now, his eyes looked tired but there was a mischievous glint to them, proof to you that he found this just as amusing as you did.

“What about you, huh? You saying that you’ve never been annoying?” He cocked an eyebrow, giving you a knowing look that let you know he had as many stories about you that you had about him.

“Look, I never once implied that I wasn’t annoying. I’ll own up to it,” You shrugged, “I was a total brat.”

Kakyoin snorted, “Don’t act like you’re not still a brat.”

“How?!” You looked almost taken aback, “How am I still a brat? You hardly see me!”

Kakyoin loved banter and teasing with his friends, it was kind of his thing. It was how he showed affection. If he didn’t gently bully you how was he supposed to show that he cared? But this, this teasing between the two of you was different. It made the room seem hotter and his pants feel tighter. That coupled with how fucking cute you looked in that damn outfit, even if your make up had worn off a bit and the lipstick was smugged. He couldn't deny it was doing things to him.

“I see you now,” His voice was deep, his tongue sticking out to wet his bottom lip as his eyes trailed you up and down.

Your cheeks immediately turned a blushy pink and your skin was hot under his gaze. Your lips parted but no words came out. This was Jotaros best friend, there was no way he was flirting with you.

Kakyoin took a few steps forward so he was as close to you as he could be without touching you. “I see you now,” He repeated in the same low voice, this time keeping eye contact with you, “And I see a brat.”

He pushes a few strands of hair out of your face and behind your ear, a gasp hitching in your throat as his heated skin touched your check briefly, “Unless you’re gonna show me otherwise.”

“I…” You swallowed the lump in your throat, suddenly weak at his gaze. “H-how?”

You look into his eyes and you can see it. You can see how much he wants you and how intense that want is. No one has ever looked at you that way before and it made your stomach erupt in butterflies. Quickly, you turn your head away not being able to handle the intensity of his stare. You feel his fingers on your chin guiding you to look back up at him, holding you there so he can take in all the features of your face. Its like he’s looking at you for the first time. His fingers move gently from your chin down to your neck, your breathing hitched in your throat when you felt the soft pad of his thumb move across your lips.

“If you want me to stop, tell me sweetheart,” He’s eyes had gotten a few shades darker and his voice seemed more strained than usual. Kakyoins free hand traveled under the sweater your were wearing, fingers lightly dancing along your side as his other hand stayed on you face, gently tracing the outline of your lips with his thumb. “Tell me right now and I’ll go back to pitching solo cups and scrubbing counters.”

In the pit of your stomach you knew you shouldn’t. You knew that if Jojo ever found out he’d flip, he’d always done his best to keep you and his friends separate. You always thought it was because you annoyed him and he didn’t want to have to be around you more than you already were, Kakyoin knew that it was because no matter how the man acted, he deeply cared for you and would do anything to protect you. These thoughts of Jotaro’s reaction filtered through your mind but your brother wasn’t here right now.

You acted on impulse, your tongue peaking out of your mouth to coax Kakyoins thumb between your lips. He watched with heavy lidded eyes as you gently sucked on the digit, swiping your tongue along the length of it. His breathing picked up for a moment before mumbling a quiet, “Fuck.”

Almost instantly you were hoisted on the counter with his lips against yours and wasting no time to swipe his tongue into your mouth. His hands quickly traveled up your thighs, pushing your skirt to pool at your hips and quickly ripping the stockings down the middle. Your legs hooked around his waist, pulling him as close to you as possible as your fingers worked at undoing his belt.

He pulls away from your lips for a moment to help you pull down his boxers and jeans. You licked your lips as you admired his cock, already hard and glistening with precum. You felt his fingers on your face again directing you to look at him.

“My cock needs to be inside you, sweetheart. Can I do that?” He was breathing heavy, he had never wanted someone so much in his life. All he wanted right now was to feel your pussy around his cock. Consequences be damned. “Can I fuck you, princess?”

You whine when you hear him speak, his voice is like nothing you ever heard before. Lust and want seemed to be dripping off every word. The whole situation leaves you speechless. At the nod of your head, Kakyoin pulls your panties to the side and slides inside you. His moan and your whimper are the only noises in the quiet apartment, his eyes watching your face intently for any sign of discomfort or desire to stop.

“Fuck me,” You breath out when your vocie finally comes to you. “Please, Kakyoin. Fuck me.”

He groans and happily obliges, rocking his cock in and out of you. Your small gasps and whimpers only egg him on more as he increases the speed of this thrust, your hands bracing yourself against the countertop. His eyes break from your face to watch his own cock slide in and out, the sight of his cock slick with your wetness makes him moan.

“Thats a perfect fucking pussy, sweetheart.” He breaths out so soft you almost can’t hear him over the slick sound of his skin on yours. His eyes find yours again, hand moving back to rest on your jawline and hold you in his gaze. He leans close and sucks your lip into his mouth, his teeth nipping at the soft flesh before soothing it with his tongue.

“You’re such a good girl,” Kakyoin tells you before pressing his lips against yours again. He picks up the pace because, goddammit, he wants to feel you cum on his cock. He pulls aways, resting his forehead against yours. Your moans are soft and the whimpers that follow cause him to smirk.

“Oh, fuck. That feels so good,” You whisper, looking into his eyes. He can see you getting closer and closer and its making it hard for him to keep composed.

“You take a cock so well, princess,” His lips brush against yours, he tilts your head to the side so that he can kiss down your neck, and then back up again. His lips find the lobe of your ear and gently suck on it. Your moans are getting more and more erratic, every now and then you’ll gasp out his name.

“You gonna be a good girl and cum on my cock,” Kakyoin whispers into your ear, his lips brushing against the shell of it. “Shit, sweetheart, I wanna feel that pretty fucking pusy come on my cock.”

It’s the sound of his voice whispering those dirty things in your ear that sends you over the edge.

“Thats it, princess. Fuck, sweetheart…I’m...shit. Can I….?” The red heads voice is ragged and incoherent but you knew what he was asking.

“Fuck, yes, please,” Its all you can do to get the words out. “Please, I wanna feel you come in me.”

You both come hard, his fingers digging roughly into the skin of your thighs and loud moans filling the space of the kitchen. The warmth of him spilling inside of you is enough to make you want a round two. After a few moments the two of you are left breathing heavy, his forehead resting on your shoulder as he tries to catch his breath.

You stay like that for a moment, trying to regain your composure and come to terms with everything that had just happened. This was a development in events that neither of you ever saw coming. Its you that make the move to separate, pushing against his chest and moving off the counter. You avoid eye contact with him, flating your skirt back down and picking up your, now ruined, stockings off the tiled floor. You could feel his cum drip out of you down to your thighs.

“That was….” Kakyoin broke the silence, buckling his belt and running a hand through his hair. You noticed he too was looking at anything but you.

“Yeah,” You nodded your head in response.

“You know we can’t uh…-”

“Yup.”

“Like, ever.”

“Trust me, I’m aware.”

“H-Happy...Happy Christmas.”

You just nod and quickly retreat to your room, throwing yourself on your bed and groaning into your pillows. After a moment, you crawled under the blankets and pulled your cat into your chest.

“Miso. I think I’m a slut….”

--------

Kakyoin watched as you retreated away down the hallway, his mind still wrapping around what had happened. The fact that he was the one that instigated it. He was the one that made all the moves and god, he shouldn’t have. But he had wanted to. He had wanted to get you in that position all night.

It was at that moment that Jotaro entered the apartment again, smelling of cigarettes and….perfume? Kakyoin was gonna have to ask him about that one later. “

“The prodigal son has returned,” The redhead teased his friend, doing his best to hide the guilt he had for what he had just done.

“Shut up,” Jotaro mumbled. He eyed his friend curiously, he was very observant and it was very naive of Kakyoin to think that he wouldn’t notice the change in his friend. “What’s wrong with you?”

I just busted a big one in your sister. And would probably do it again if the chance presented itself. No biggie.

“I’m, uh, I’m just tired.”

-----------

Thank you so much for reading this! I appreciate it very much. Let me know what you think of it and if I should continue the story. Merry Christmas!

#kakyoin x reader #noriaki kakyoin #noriaki kakyoin x reader #kakyoin #jjba #jjba x reader #jotaro x reader #jotaro kujo #jotaro #jojo #stardust crusaders

160 notes · View notes