#this is from chapter....47 maybe 48

[modeus-the-misanthrope]

I just love how genuinely displeased Laois is at how lame those familiars look.

[nanaminokanojo]

BAD NEWS | CHAPTER INDEX/PROLOGUE (Part 1-64)

-just when you thought you were over your humongous crush on your older brother’s best friend, geto suguru, you couldn’t be more dead wrong, and maybe there isn’t really anything holding you back from acting on it now that you’re all grown up…except satoru doesn’t like suguru for you because he knows his kind all too well: a huge ass playboy who breaks hearts like he changes socks. but you think. MAYBE you’ll be the exception...maybe not.

CHARACTERS: drummer!geto suguru x (fem/afab) reader x guitarist!sukuna | gojo satoru | itadori yuuji | kugisaki nobara | fushiguro megumi | sukuna | fushiguro toji | nanami kento | choso | tsukumo yuuki | shoko ieiri | utahime iori

GENRE: full-length smau + prose | band au, tats, piercings, the whole shebang | college au | stupid pining | aged-up characters | friends to lovers (?) | this is gonna have smutty stuff because why not?

TW/CW: strong/mature language | adult content so mdni on some parts; just skip them. you’re not missing much | mentions of alcohol, drugs | mentions of cheating, promiscuity, mild dubcon (consent >>>), etc. | again, god-awful pet names i’d cringe at if a 3d person says it | toxic behavior | will add more if something arises

AKI’S NOTES: I would like to express my sincerest thanks to everyone who loved and supported “Thawing Ice Queen” as well as those who participated in the poll on which smau I’m going to write next. So, this is what won in said poll, and I hope it gets as much as love as TIQ if not more. Reblogs and likes are very much appreciated, and I actively respond to comments as well as Asks. Also, if you’re interested, I will include you in the tag list. Just message me through whatever avenue you’re most comfortable with. Happy reading!

ADDITIONAL NOTES: i will be using pics and other media which would fit situations and make the smau-ness of this piece a little more realistic and entertaining when i believe it’s appropriate/fitting to the plot (as i've done with TIQ). having said that, with regard to inclusivity, i just want to put it out there that they will not necessarily be aimed as the exact descriptions to fit a supposedly generic reader nor will they be representative of a specific race or color (even if you’re/the reader is gojo’s sister here). it’s all for the simple fact of media availability, for funsies and the fact that i don’t exclusively write in consideration of those aspects when using reader-insert characters unless i specify it. thank you for understanding.

MASTERLIST

CHAPTERS: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15

16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30

31 | 32 | 33 | 34 | 35 | 36 | 37 | 38 | 39 | 40 | 41 | 42 | 43 | 44 | 45

46 | 47 | 48 | 49 | 50 | 51 | 52 | 53 | 54 | 55 | 56 | 57 | 58 | 59 | 60

61 | 62 | 63 | 64 | CHAPTER INDEX II

© ORIGINAL WORK BY nanaminokanojo. CHARACTERS ARE INSPIRED BY GEGE AKUTAMI’S “JUJUTSU KAISEN”. [20240331]

PHOTOS/IMAGES/GIF/FANART/ANY MEDIA CREDITS GO TO THE RESPECTIVE OWNERS.

[thebestofoneshots]

SERIES MASTERLIST

Gilded Constellations | (wolfstar x reader)

Summary: You meet Sirius and Regulus at a family vacation in the Caribbean, but things don't go as planned and you end up losing contact once the trip is over. Years later your family moves to England and you get accepted at Hogwarts where you finally meet Sirius once again, along with all of his friends. One of them with a mysterious secret, that you'll uncover as you embark on your own Hogwarts adventure. Mostly canon-compliant. This IS a wolfstar x reader fic, but it's incredibly slow burn. They won't start all dating each other until we're very deep into the story, but I promise the long wait will be worth it.

Read Gilded Constellations on AO3

Read the French Translation by @nagareboshi-chiyo

Paring: Sirius Black x Reader / Remus Lupin x reader / Wolfstar x reader

Chapter average: 5k - 6.5 k

Content: Smut in later chapters, Poly!Marauders, throuple, graphic descriptions of violence, MAJOR and minor character death (this is The Marauders Era guys, you know), jealousy, angst, pining, love triangle, LGBTQ+ themes, The Wizarding war 1.0, implied child abuse, possible proofreading errors, mental health struggles, hurt no comfort, hurt with comfort, period typical attitude, first war with Voldemort, canonical character's death, fluff, Requited Love, F/M/M, mostly canon-compliant.

Status: Ongoing (Weekly updates)

♡ Indicates SMUT

PLAYLIST

01 | Summer Breeze

02 | Escape

03 | Bitter Sweet Symphony

04 | Rainy Days and Mondays

05 | Good times

06 | Crazy Little Thing Called Love

07 | Peaceful Easy Feeling

08 I Fooled Around and Fell in Love

09 | The Fairy Feller's Master-Stroke

10 | Black Dog

11 | Do Ya

12 | You really got me

13 | Rebel, Rebel

14 | Maybe I’m Amazed

15 | No One Like You

Interlude (Q&A Event)

16 | Boogie Wonderland

17 | Tonight’s What It Means To Be Young

18 | Friends will be Friends

19 | Silver Bird

20 | Bad Moon Rising

21 | Fox on the Run

22 | Long Long Way From Home

23 | Hungry Eyes

24 | Peace of Mind

25 | I’ll get Even With You

26 | Hooked on a Feeling

27 | Can’t Take My Eyes Off You

28 | If You Want BIood, (You’ve Got It)

29 | With a Little Help From My Friends

30 | Bridge Over Troubled Water

31 | Strange Magic

32 | Come a Little Bit Closer

33 | More Than a Feeling

34 | You Belong to Me

35 | Chill of Desire

36 | Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy

37 | Gimme, Gimme, Gimme

38 | Let the Good Times Roll

39 | Running With the Pack

40 | Hot Stuff

41 | Urban Adventure

42 | Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas

43 | Sympathy for the Devil

44 | No One But You

45 | Hold The Line

46 | Comfortably Numb

47 | Let Me Take You Home Tonight

48 | Dust in the Wind

49 | High Hopes

50 | Love the One You're With ♡

51 | Some Guys Have All The Luck ♡

52 | Twentieth Century Fox

53 | Too Much Love Will KiII You

54 | Sail Away Sweet Sister

55 | Noone Together

56 | Who Wants To Live Forever

57 | Play the Game

58 | Staying Power

59 | Break on Through

60 | Stone in Love

61 | Mr. Blue Sky

62 |

63 |

64 |

65 |

66 |

67 |

68 |

69 |

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BONUS TRACKS:

Your Theories, The Note, The Costumes, Sirius and the Chimney, Sirius and Vix after the bad moon, Evans and Vixen, Remus and Vixen at the infirmary, Remus holding Sirius at DADA, Remus and Sirius’ height difference, the FOXSTAR picture, Art by @nineloseteeth, We're going French,

Leave a comment telling me if you want to join the tag list

A/N: Most Poly!Marauders fics are oneshots, where the relationship between characters is already established, and they're all happy and pleased with it. No issues, no drama, but I WANTED the drama. Couldn't find it, so I set myself up to write the story behind the stablished relationship. I wanted to know how they started dating each other, the jealousy, the will they won't they, because getting into a poly relationship can't be an easy task, and I wanted to explore that story. If you're interested: Welcome to Gilded Constellations!

[wandafiction]

Just Us - Series List

Y/n is a multimillionaire. Wanda Maximoff is a divorced mum of two twin boys who is trying her best. What happens when their paths cross at a club and Y/n takes Wanda home for the night?

Warnings: This story is an 18+ read, Minors DNI, contains talks and description of Death, Accidents, Injury, Child Loss, Abuse (Physical and Emotional), Anxiety, Panic Attacks, Suggestive themes, Smut (Each Chapter With Themes Explained), Angst (Lots of It), And Some Fluff Thrown in because I felt bad. Top Reader, Bottom Wanda

Each chapter will come with their own warnings.

This is a story that I have put up on my Wattpad and my Ao3 and thought I would share it here for more of you wonderful people. I do hope you enjoy this read. There will be mistakes here and there and maybe some incorrect translations.

So this is an AU story with the MCU characters. So the ages and story lines with be changed and different from that in the movies. 

I will right some history for each character as the story progresses just so ages and other things make sense. 

All the Character's in this are played by their respective actors and certain aspects of the MCU have been added in. But once again its not going to be an alternative marvel story it is a completely different universe. 

I don't own any if the MCU characters.

Master List

Chapter List

Chapter 1 - Yours or Mine

Chapter 2 18+ - First Time

Chapter 3 - How Much

Chapter 4 18+ - Beautiful

Chapter 5 - Accent

Chapter 6 - The Twins

Chapter 7 - Just Add 8

Chapter 8 - Panic Attack

Chapter 9 - Sounds Like A date

Chapter 10 - Happy Tears

Chapter 11 - Twenty Percent

Chapter 12 - Favourite Colour

Chapter 13 - Ex-husbands Clothes

Chapter 14 18+ - Trust is Not Like Candy

Chapter 15 - Morning Bliss

Chapter 16 - Sisterly Advice

Chapter 17 - Lunch Date

Chapter 18 - Not By Blood, By Choice

Chapter 19 18+ - Frozen Peas

Chapter 20 - Scarlet Witch

Chapter 21 - Iron Man

Chapter 22 18+ - Love Language

Chapter 23 - The Friends

Chapter 24 - Hela's Kitchen

Chapter 25 - The Question

Chapter 26 - From Second To First

Chapter 27 - Mr Blue Sky

Chapter 28 - Protective Friend

Chapter 29 - It's Real To Me

Chapter 30 - Pile On

Chapter 31 18+ - Water Fight

Chapter 32 - Head Scratches

Chapter 33 - Billy's Discovery

Chapter 34 - Superhero Trio

Chapter 35 - Pancakes and L Bombs.

Chapter 36 - 10 Out Of 10 Dive

Chapter 37 - Tickle Monster

Chapter 38 - Sarah Stark

Chapter 39 - Love Persevering

Chapter 40 - First Meeting

Chapter 41 - Hear, Listen, Take It In

Chapter 42 - Touch

Chapter 43 - Mockingbird

Chapter 44 - Family

Chapter 45 - Search Party

Chapter 46 - Bowl Of Popcorn

Chapter 47 - Pet Names

Chapter 48 18+ - Trying Something New

Chapter 49 - French Braids

Chapter 50 - Not Taking Advantage

Chapter 51 - To Understand Someone

Chapter 52 - The Row

Chapter 53 18+ - I Need You

Chapter 54 - Your Flaws Are Your Strengths

Chapter 55 18+ - Jealousy

Chapter 56 - I Can't Be Here

Chapter 57 - Stephanie Grace Turner

Chapter 58 - Zak The Waiter

Chapter 59 18+ - Declarations

Chapter 60 - Clingy

Chapter 61 - Triple Chocolate Brownies

Chapter 62 - Watch Me

Chapter 63 - Grown-Up Conversations

Chapter 64 - A+

Chapter 65 18+ - Dynamic

Chapter 66 - You Don't Get It

Chapter 67 - Conditioned

Chapter 68 - Selachimorpha

Chapter 69 - Beed Stroganoff

Chapter 70 - Ruby-Throated Hummingbird

Chapter 71 - Realisations

Chapter 72 - Princess

Chapter 73 - The Talk

Chapter 74 - Black Widow

Chapter 75 - Can I Join You

Chapter 76 - Люли, люли, люленьки

Chapter 77 - Moose

Chapter 78 - Aurora Borealis

Chapter 79 - Calgary

Chapter 80 18+ - Mirror

Chapter 81 - Massage and Important Conversations

Chapter 82 - Banff

Chapter 83 - Strawberries

Chapter 84 - Bayushki Bayu

Chapter 85 - Cookies

Chapter 86 18+ - Control

Chapter 87 - Hyper Puppy

Chapter 88 - Treehouse

Chapter 89 - 312

Chapter 90 - Forgiveness

Chapter 91 18+ - Always Feel Good

Chapter 92 - Your Third Love

Chapter 93 18+ - Daddy

Chapter 94 - Home

Chapter 95 - Stalker

Chapter 96 - Can't Catch A Break

Chapter 97 18+ - Mile High Club

Chapter 98 - Happy

Chapter 99 - Halloween

Chapter 100 - What's In The Box?

Chapter 101 - Hired

Chapter 102 - I've Got You

Chapter 103 - Missed Morning Message

Chapter 104 - Someone I Would Like You To Meet

Chapter 105 - Sis

Chapter 106 - Soulmates

Chapter 107 - Eleos

Chapter 108 - I Called Her Mom

Chapter 109 - Suka

Chapter 110 - How Have I Made It Worse?

Chapter 111 - What Scares You?

Chapter 112 - I Thought I Was Helping

Chapter 113 - What If They Leave?

Chapter 114 - Yelena!

Chapter 115 - Puppy In Training

Chapter 116 - Your Wish Is My Command

Chapter 117 - Morning Sex

Chapter 118 - Safe

Chapter 119 - Work On Yourself

Chapter 120 - Happy Thanksgiving

Chapter 121 - I Hate This

Chapter 122 - To Be A Deer

Chapter 123 - Is Love Enough?

Chapter 124 - Let's Go Out Out

Chapter 125 - Feeling Of Rejection

Chapter 126 - You Should Hate Me

Chapter 127 - You Ready?

Chapter 128 - Pietro

Chapter 129 - Questions And Opinions

Chapter 130 - What Are You Up To?

Chapter 131 - When Pigs Fly

Chapter 132 - Science Lesson

[jeonqkooks]

our beloved summer | jjk (07)

You made a vow to hate Jeon Jungkook ever since he packed up and left you without a single explanation, but when he shows up at your door after years of radio silence, it turns out that maybe your resolve isn’t as strong as you thought.

pairing: producer!jungkook x songwriter!reader genre/warnings: exes au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, swearing, mentions of oc's mother because we know girlie is hella traumatized, mentions of drinking, mentions of an almost physical fight, abandonment issues, jk forgets to practice safe driving for 2 seconds, and uhmmm kissing 🤫, anddd that cliffhanger? 👀 rating: 18+ (minors dni) word count: 10.8k note (1): this is the longest it has taken me to update obs and i do feel pretty guilty about that. but it's finally here now and this is one of the chapters that i'm the most nervous about posting. massive thanks to @daechwitatamic and @/wintaerbaer (edited 2024: crossed out but not removed bc even tho she plagiarized obs afterward, she did beta this for me so i guess i still gotta give her that lmfao) for beta-ing this for me or else i would've screamed cried thrown up and scrapped the whole thing, and to @jeonwiixard for being a wonderful cheerleader as i was writing this, and to everyone in my beloved obs discord server for always being so sweet and kind and putting a smile on my smile every day since the server was created. also to my sunshine ☀︎ for introducing me to the song mentioned below bc HELLO is it not just one of the most obs coded songs ever. love you all my babies <3

series masterpost / playlist ; moodboards ; taglist join our OBS discord server ✨

as always, i’d appreciate any thoughts or comments you may have, and please drop a like and/or reblog if you enjoy reading ♡

Somewhere in the multiverse There's a me and you that works We never fuck it up We're out there still in love Somewhere in the multiverse Maybe that's enough

multiverse - Maya Manuele ft. PEMRBOKE

Sometimes, whenever you look up at the moon at night, you wonder if Jungkook is doing the same thing.

Even when you fall out of love with someone, it still hurts. It hurts because you once loved them so much it felt like the sky would collapse if you couldn’t be with them. It hurts because the love wasn’t taken from you, but rather it started slipping away on its own, more and more each day until you realize you’re holding onto nothing when there once was everything.

You can’t say that you’re too familiar with that kind of hurt though. You’ve never fallen out of love before.

You don’t think Jungkook is too familiar with it either, at least not when he left you.

You wonder if he thinks about you from time to time and gets sad. You think he does, because you know that he loved you. Something ended for him too. The memories that you shared were his memories too.

You hope that it’s painful for him whenever thoughts of you cross his mind, because that would mean that he cares. That a part of him still cares.

And if he still cares, then he might come back.

Despite the front that you try to parade around, there is a part of you that will always leave your heart vacant for him, regardless of whether or not he would return. It’s a scary thought, one that you would rather avoid at all costs, one that says there will be no one that you love more than you loved Jungkook. Maybe there can’t be another person that you will love at all.

You can come back quietly, like the wind slipping through the crack I leave in the window at night; or you can announce your return resoundingly like a sudden downpour quenching the summer heat. I don’t care. I kept your side of the bed empty and warm, waiting for you to come back. Hoping that you would come home.

[08:47] Yoongi: sure you don’t want me to drive you there? [08:48] Yoongi: i can pick you up in 30 [08:52] You: positive 🤧 i told you i already booked the train. it’s only 4 hours away [08:53] You: i’ll survive, yoongs [08:55] Yoongi: did you not watch Train To Busan? [08:56] You: ? [08:57] Yoongi: what if there’s a zombie apocalypse [09:00] You: yoongi if there’s a zombie apocalypse, how is your CONVERTIBLE supposed to keep me safe [09:01] Yoongi: i’ll put the roof up [09:02] You: stop talking [09:02] You: please stop talking. [09:03] Yoongi: 😡😡😡 [09:03] You: 😇 [09:03] You: gotta get dressed now though. i’ll see u when i get back? :) [09:05] Yoongi: fine [09:06] Yoongi: safe travels. text me when you get there :)

You plop onto your bed with a sigh, glancing at the bag that’s already packed and sitting near your wardrobe, lonely. You stay like that for a while, contemplating whether or not you should bail at the very last minute.

It was not on your bingo card that you’d be here, agonizing over your ex-boyfriend’s brother’s wedding. Nope. Absolutely no one saw it coming.

For fuck’s sake, why would they invite you to a wedding? A celebration of love? It feels like you’re being forced onto a prank show, just waiting for someone to jump out and scream in your face.

You learned that the wedding was for close friends and family only, so it would be a relatively small event, which makes it even more confusing why you were also asked to join. Maybe the world is changing too rapidly and you’re just a little old-fashioned for it, but you really don’t understand why your ex-boyfriend’s family would want you there.

Taehyung and Jimin were invited too; they’re Jungkook’s best friends after all. They’re practically an extension of the family, Jungkook’s brothers by choice. But Taehyung doesn’t come back from his work trip until the day of the wedding, and Jimin… Well, he just doesn’t want to go to a Busan wedding in the middle of winter.

So why are you even going?

You could’ve declined. Said you couldn’t attend because the invitation came in so late. Made up a work trip or a family emergency. There’s a plethora of excuses you could’ve used.

Or you could’ve simply said no. That would’ve been perfectly fine too. No one would even need to ask why.

But maybe it was because his mother had customized the invite with her own handwriting in the back. You would’ve missed it if you hadn’t spent hours meticulously studying the card like someone was going to quiz you. It wasn’t anything special - just We hope to see you there - but you think you’d feel really bad to decline after she’d made the extra effort to ask you to come.

When you told Yoongi that you would be attending Jungkook’s brother’s wedding, he didn’t seem upset. Still cool as a cucumber. Although if he was bothered by the announcement, you don’t think he would’ve let it show. It did take him a minute to take it in, but then he just pecked your cheek and asked if you could bring a plus-one. You both knew that you wouldn’t even if that was an option.

Pushing your body off the bed, you drag yourself to the bathroom to splash some water on your face. Then sunscreen. Then change into the clothes you’d already picked out last night. Your train doesn’t leave for another hour and fifteen minutes, but you want to be there at least twenty minutes early just in case. This is one of your only good habits.

You rub your eyes when you finally haul yourself outside, thinking you must still be dreaming because what is Jungkook’s car doing here?

You blink a few times, expecting the vehicle to disappear in a puff of white smoke.

Spoiler alert: It doesn’t.

The car is in front of you, but the man is nowhere to be found.

You stand there dumbfoundedly, contemplating whether you should wait it out for a little bit to see if he’s actually here. He comes running up to you a couple minutes later, holding two paper cups in his hands, one of them a chai latte. A memory you’d buried long ago comes rushing to the surface. It’s too early for you to be feeling.

“Hi,” he says, his warm breath coming out in a huff of smoke in the crisp morning air.

“Hi?” you mutter dumbly when he trades the bag in your hand for the drink. There’s a moment where you’re genuinely baffled, wondering if this is a memory reel playing right before your eyes. This is your Jungkook, wearing that same old smile whenever he used to come bounding up your dorm building so you could walk to the library together, where he would hang out with you during your shift if he didn’t have classes. “What are you doing here?”

You don’t remember telling him what time your train was, so he’d probably badgered it out of Taehyung or Jimin somehow.

“I thought I could drive us there,” he says. “I texted you about it.”

Well, that explains it. You don’t bother with his dozens of messages anymore. “Oh, uhm, I already booked the train.”

This doesn’t seem to faze him at all. “Free cancellation up to 15 minutes before departure.” Jungkook grins, clearly eager despite your obvious reluctance. It’s too early for this, whatever the hell this is.

When you told him that you had RSVP’d yes to the invitation, he was surprised that you even knew about the wedding. He even seemed nervous that day.

“What if I’d already left?” you ask.

He blinks, then stammers like a confused child. It’s cute, and you have to mentally slap yourself over the head for even thinking that.

“Then I’d go after you.”

How? you scoff internally. Unrealistic.

Regardless, not even an hour ago, you were declining Yoongi’s offer to drive you there. Now, you’re standing here, in front of your ex-boyfriend, contemplating whether or not you should go with him.

“Let’s go,” he says after a minute. “We don’t wanna be stuck in traffic.”

“I haven’t said yes.” Yet. “It’s a 4-hour drive.”

You don’t have to clarify what you mean. He understands it.

You both just stare at each other for a moment, the tension suddenly thickening with every passing second. Four hours on the road. Four hours alone in a car with Jungkook. That’s about two hundred minutes more than you think you can handle.

It’s like he can see right through you. “Don’t think about it,” he says, voice dropping lower. “It’s just a weekend. Everything will still be here for you to think about when we get back.”

In your head, it translates to: All of our shit will still be here when we get back. You can keep being mad at me then.

You hope that’s not true. You hope that when you get back, the things that keep you up at night will simply cease to exist. That in the two days you’ll be gone, a genie will materialize and solve all your problems for you.

Either way, it’s probably for the best that you aren’t mean to him this weekend. You’re stuck with him for the next 48 hours or so; it’ll only stress you out even more if you channel all of your energy into tormenting him. Besides, you’re already the ex girlfriend who has no place alongside his family. You don’t want to be the dark cloud raining on everyone’s parade too.

Maybe you’d already made up your mind when you let him take the bag from you.

For the first half of the drive, you were unconscious.

It’s a useless superpower that you have, the ability to fall asleep anywhere - literally anywhere, including in the passenger seat of your ex-boyfriend’s car while he escorts you to his hometown. Melatonin gummies manufacturers hate you.

You could’ve slept the whole drive, but around the second hour mark, you were startled awake when your body jostled forward, straining against your seatbelt uncomfortably. There was an arm trying to hold you back, despite the seatbelt having done its job well.

“Fuck,” Jungkook curses before he turns toward you, worry written all over his face. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry, are you okay?”

You blink, still half asleep. “I’m okay,” you say. The minivan that Jungkook almost rear-ended continues on its merry way, carrying what seems to be a family of five. “What happened?”

He sighs, his outstretched arm retreating back to his side. “I got a bit distracted, that’s all.”

You take in your surroundings then. There’s barely any other cars in sight, no tacky billboard that sticks out like a sore thumb to catch your attention. There’s just the freeway, stretching on empty for all you can see.

“By what?” you ask.

“Nothing,” he says. “Go back to sleep. I’ll wake you when we get there.”

See, you have the superpower of falling asleep anywhere and everywhere, but once you’ve been woken up, it’s not as easy to fall back asleep.

That, and the fact that you’re hungry as shit.

You open your mouth, about to say no, about to offer to drive the rest of the way if Jungkook is tired, but your stomach doesn’t let you get a word out. It growls, filling the space of the car, making you want to chuck yourself out the fucking window and run all the way back to the city. This wouldn’t have happened had you taken the train, because if you had, there would’ve been food services and no one would be subject to hearing your stomach sing like it’s chewing out a small puppy in there. Life is nothing but an endless pit of embarrassment and despair.

Your arms hold themselves tighter around your frame, practically squeezing into your abdomen as you will it to please, please, please be quiet. Jungkook stares at you, and you can tell by the teeny tiny quirk of his lips that he’s trying to bite back a smile. He’s relaxed, but there’s still something hesitant on his face. It takes him a minute before he finally throws the question out.

“Do you want to go to that guksu place that we used-” that we used to go to, “you know the place. The one that’s right off the freeway?”

The sun is out today. The sky unfolds endlessly just outside the window, coloring blue everything your eyes land on. There are strips of clouds scattered here and there, like delicate strokes of white paint on an azure canvas. Even the winter cold has to soften.You bite into your cheek. Don’t think, that’s what he had told you.

Not much about this quaint restaurant has changed. The quirky decorations are still where they used to be, the windows still the same unique stained glass that you never came across anywhere else. You remember the elderly woman who runs the place, even if she doesn’t have a single clue who you are. The golden retriever you used to fawn over every time you stopped by, sits quietly by the door and watches the cars pass by, his fur now graying as weariness begins to settle into those old bones.

You would’ve been displeased if the place had changed, because, well, you don’t like change. But then again, this familiarity is dangerous. It tricks you into thinking that everything is still the same, even you and him. Deludes you into believing that you’re still in love and that he’ll walk out of here holding your hand.

Regardless, the first spoonful has you biting back a smile.

“How is it?” Jungkook asks.

It makes you feel all warm inside, and then a little sad, nostalgic.

“Tastes just the same,” you tell him simply.

“Hmm.”

He lets you satisfy your hunger in peace. It’s the least he can do anyway.

There’s a wall near the back of the restaurant, where people could hang polaroids of themselves and cute handwritten notes. You think if you dig through the hundreds of photos scattered across the space, you might be able to find you and Jungkook there, if you two haven’t already been thrown out long ago to make room for new memories.

He pays for your food after you’re both finished, despite some protesting on your side. As you leave, you’re busy thinking that if you could have a moment to marvel at that far-back wall of memories, if you could find a photo of you and him there, you would probably sneak it into your coat pocket.

It’d be another thing to add to your pile of Jungkook memorabilia - the old clothes in the back of your closet, the stack of dusty polaroids at the bottom of your drawer. You wonder if he keeps anything of yours, maybe an old t-shirt that you forgot to take back. It’s probably unlikely, but a girl can hope.

You miss the way Jungkook glances back, thinking the exact same thing.

You survive the rest of the drive with more ease, probably because of the food. You spend most of the remaining 2 hours leaning against the window, humming to the radio, closing your eyes but not really sleeping. You even forget to be nervous about what is to come.

That is, until the car pulls up to the venue.

It’s absolutely gorgeous, and a lot bigger than you imagined - a modern beach house overlooking the waters. It’s not as extravagant as one would expect to see when they come to a wedding, but considering the small crowd in attendance, this is more than enough. You see people rush in and out of the place even from far away - planners, caterers, the bridesmaids and groomsmen, probably.

You feel a bit comforted just watching this. His family seems to be doing a lot better than before. It’s nice to know.

You barely make it out of the car before someone calls your name, and pulls you into a hug that knocks the wind out of you. Although, when you catch the scent of her hair, you instantly know who it is.

Parents usually have a scent that’s distinct to only their kids, a scent so cozy and homely that no perfume can ever mask. You can only describe your mom’s scent with a feeling, specifically the feeling of your chest tightening, tingling with a bittersweetness that you never found elsewhere. 

Strangely enough, Jungkook’s mother has always made you feel the opposite. She makes you feel relieved to be in her embrace, like she accepts you for who you are even if all you are to her, at the end of the day, is a stranger.

You hug her back awkwardly, hesitantly, in front of Jungkook’s dad, his brother Junghyun, and a girl you don’t know. You assume that she’s the bride-to-be, the main character whom this weekend revolves around. Sooji, you remember that was the name on the wedding invitation.

You get choked up suddenly, eyes turning glassy though you quickly blink it away. You’re not sure if you’ve had someone be so happy to see you. Bypassers might even think that you just found the cure for cancer.

For a second there, you wonder if your mere presence has ever made your mother this overjoyed.

You look at Jungkook for help, silently asking him to rescue you. Who else are you supposed to turn to if not him?

He understands that look. “Okay, mom,” he says, entangling her arms from you with ease, “Y/N’s tired from the drive. Let’s let her rest, yeah? I’ll show her the room.”

She ignores her son. “Honey,” she says, brushing your hair away from your face so she could see you better. “Thank you for coming.” She used to insist that you call her “mom”, or at least by her first name because “Mrs. Jeon” was too formal for someone she considered family.

You now have to opt for the latter, because “mom” isn’t an option for you anymore.

“Thank you for inviting me, Mrs. Jeon,” you tell her with a smile. You’re not really sure what else to say, but it makes you a little sad just calling her that.

She opens her mouth before closing it again, seemingly about to jokingly scold you for the formality before she recognizes the bittersweet look in your eyes. She just smiles at you then. There’s not much to be done about it.

You don’t know if anyone else sees how the moment is weighed down. Probably not. Maybe it’s just you and her who share this sentiment.

Jungkook doesn’t wait for his mom anymore. Sons, typical. He wedges himself between the two of you like a bulldozer and leads you inside the house. 

Even though all you have is an overnight bag, Jungkook carries it for you all the way up to your room, which is only down the hall from his. Then he disappears pretty quickly afterward, saying something about his best man duties and putting out fires. He seems apologetic as he tells you this, but it’s not like you’re expecting him to babysit you all weekend.

You bore yourself to death in your room for a while, before you remember you have to text Yoongi to let him know you got here safely. Though, you stop short of telling him that it was Jungkook who drove you here. It’s trivial enough, right? You don’t want Yoongi to feel bad over nothing. You do, however, inform Taehyung and Jimin when you text them about it, to which Jimin only responds with a preemptively disapproving ‘Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.’

When you get too stir-crazy, you wander outside, hoping to explore the beach before it gets dark and colder. You try to stay out of everyone’s way, because a good guest is a quiet guest. You seem to be doing a good job. No one notices you, not even Jungkook’s mom but that’s because she’s the person you actively want to avoid the most. You don’t know what you’d even say to her if she gets you alone.

Everything is hectic, as one can probably imagine when it comes to wedding preparations. You haven’t had anyone close to you get married yet, so it’s safe to say that you’re pretty much clueless about all of this. You wonder what it’ll be like when your big day comes around, if you even ever get married. You haven’t thought about it in a long time. Why would you? You don’t really have a reason to think about this. It’s much easier to picture Taehyung’s or Jimin’s wedding day than your own.

Your opinion on having kids still remains the same, and you were never one of those girls who daydreamed about having a big and extravagant wedding, but it’s not such a bad idea to ponder about. You still think marriage is a scary thing - it’s one of the biggest commitments a person could ever make - but you’re not entirely opposed to getting married. 

Why are you even mulling over this? Your time might never even come.

When you round the corner to get the steps that would lead you down to the beach, you run into Sooji and a woman holding a thick binder - must be a wedding planner. You give Jungkook’s future sister-in-law an awkward smile in greeting, which she returns much more gracefully before she tells the woman that she’ll be with her in a minute.

So now you’re stuck here, about to make small talk with a person you have never met before, and will likely never see again. Great. 

“Hi,” you say, extending a hand. “I haven’t had the chance to introduce myself. I’m Y/N.”

“I’m Sooji,” she replies warmly as she shakes your hand, and you have to stop yourself from being a little weirdo and thinking about how silky her hair looks up close. “You’re Jungkook’s… friend, right?”

You purse your lips before nodding with a chuckle. The pause tells you that she knows, and you wouldn’t be surprised if she’s uncomfortable having you here. 

“I’m sorry if this is weird. You probably don’t want a complete stranger at your wedding.”

Sooji shakes her head instantly, waving her hands around to dismiss your apology. “Please, it’s totally fine. Junghyun’s mom talked to me about it before we sent out the invites. I wouldn’t have agreed if I was really bothered. Don’t worry about it, seriously.”

“Why did you agree?” you ask, trying to sound as polite as possible. “You don’t know who I am.”

“I guess I was curious.” She shrugs, before laughing lightly as she says, “I used to think you weren’t real.”

“Huh?”

“She talks about you constantly. Never in front of Jungkook, of course. But she’s really fond of you, and you probably already know that doesn’t happen very often. She really does see you like a daughter. She made you sound too good to be true.”

You’re not sure how to respond to that. His mom still thinks about you, still talks about you after all this time. You’re just his ex-girlfriend, but she considers you her family. You don’t know what to do with this information nor the way it pinches your heart.

“I-” You purse your lips, fumbling with the responses in your head. You settle on a light laugh, because Sooji can probably tell that you’re struggling with the words too. “I have to be honest. I don’t know what to say to that.”

“You don’t have to say anything. I just thought you should know that you’re still very much loved here.” She gives you a kind smile, and it looks like she wants to tell you something else but decides against it in the end. Sooji’s eyes land somewhere behind you before she points in that general direction. “I have to go take care of an issue with the flowers, but look, Jungkook is here. Why don’t you ask him to show you around?”

And then she’s already off. Overall, what a… strange interaction.

You turn around to see Jungkook standing near one of the entrances to the house. As you watch him talk to someone - a bridesmaid, you assume, or just one of the other guests - you try not to think about the fact that there’s a stirring sensation in your stomach, and that it only intensifies when she throws her head back in a pretty laugh, a perfectly manicured hand landing on his arm like he’s the most charming person she’s ever met. 

You don’t give it a name, don’t label it green in color even though you’re blue and he’s golden sunshine. You don’t acknowledge that it’s a feeling, because doing so would make it real and there are certain truths that you’d rather delude yourself into thinking are lies.

When Jungkook’s eyes catch yours and he cuts off the woman mid-sentence with a curt excuse me, you don’t acknowledge that feeling either, but it’s warm and it blooms in your chest as he makes his way to you. It’s something victorious, something that tickles your ribs.

He comes to you like you’re a destination he’s been waiting all his life to reach, and you certainly, adamantly don’t acknowledge the spectacularly dizzying feeling that swallows you whole when he places a gentle hand on your arm, his voice soft as he says, “There you are. I was looking for you.”

The familiarity, it’s catastrophic.

“I was just walking around,” you tell him. “There’s not a lot to do here. I was bored.”

“You have me,” he says. Probably not in that way, but you’d like to think that’s how he means it. “I don’t have any more fires to put out. What do you want to do now?”

You glance over your surroundings, still set on your original plans. You wanted to go alone, but you suppose you can let him accompany you. You check the time on your phone before asking, “Can we go down to the beach? I wanna see if we can catch the sunset.”

You used to do this whenever you came here to visit - walk along the beach, hand in hand, sunlight in your hair and the cool breeze holding you tight in the afterglow.

The keyword here is “used to”. Now, you have to stuff your hands in your pockets just so you don’t reach for him every time you shiver.

It’s late enough in the afternoon for you to see the moon faintly shine against a blue and orange backdrop. Sun and moon, together in the same frame. It feels symbolic somehow. You’re not really sure.

“The moon looks like an egg,” Jungkook observes astutely, taking casual strides next to you. It makes you burst into easy laughter, which makes him laugh with you too. You stop walking when you reach what you think is a good spot to watch the sky. 

“Let’s sit here for a bit,” you say. It’s not the greatest idea - sitting idly by would only make you colder - but you just want to stop and look at the sunset. Once you’re seated in the sand, you respond to his moon remark, “That’s true, y’know. NASA said so.”

“Yeah,” he says, settling down beside you, “you made me read that.”

You’d forgotten about it, and you didn’t think that he’d remember. It’s freezing cold and the moon looks like an egg, but you’re not thinking, and you feel safe. Nothing can hurt you here, or at least that’s what you’d like to tell yourself.

You wrap your arms around yourself to keep from shivering, but you still shiver anyways.

“Are you cold?” he asks.

“A little,” you admit. “I should’ve worn a thicker sweater. But it’s o-”

He doesn’t let you finish the sentence, just smoothly takes off his jacket to put it around your shoulders.

You put your hands atop his to stop him. When you touch him, there’s an electric tingle that almost makes you flinch. He feels warm, still resembling a human furnace. 

“No, you don’t have t-”

“Take the jacket, Y/N,” he says. “It’s just a jacket.”

The jacket smells like him. It only makes you want to crawl further into the warmth.

He seems more self-assured here, that’s what you notice. More like the version of himself that he used to be. Confident, sometimes borderline cocky. Annoying but oddly endearing, you came to love that about him.

His relaxed demeanor is understandable. You’re merely a visitor here, while this is his homeground. 

“I’m curious about something,” he says after a while.

“Okay.”

“What’s the deal with Wednesdays?” he asks. 

“You know how they say bad things come in threes?” You purse your lips, thinking it over, feeling something bitter in your mouth as you recall the events that led to this. “My parents got divorced on a Wednesday. I moved out of mom’s house on a Wednesday. And…” You hold your knees close to your chest as you hesitate to utter this last part, “we broke up on a Wednesday.”

You see the exact moment Jungkook mentally slaps himself, paling a couple shades as he tongues his cheek, not expecting his question to inadvertently lead back to this. It wasn’t your intention to guilt trip him. It was true that he dumped you on a Wednesday, but you don’t want the mood to turn sour, to have to mull over this again. Like he said, it will still be there for you to worry about when you get back. You’re not looking forward to returning to a shitshow, but what you’d hate even more is to tarnish the memories of this place just because you can’t keep from being vindictive for not even a weekend.

“I was born on a Wednesday too, so I guess bad things come in fours sometimes,” you continue, chuckling to yourself humorlessly.

A frown appears on his face almost instantaneously. “What is that supposed to mean?”

You shrug. Jungkook turns his body toward you, which makes you spare him a glance before you return your gaze to the horizon. His face is so serious that it’s almost funny. “Y/N,” he presses. “Why would you say that?”

“C’mon, it’s a joke. I was just being self-deprecating. Lighten up.”

“Why are you talking like that?”

“Like what? Contrary to popular belief, I don’t walk around with a thundercloud over my head all the time,” you laugh lightly. “I figured if there was a day to be nice to you, it should be today. And tomorrow, I guess.”

“This is you being nice?”

Funny how just a few weeks ago, you were fighting with him and calling him a hypocrite. Now, you’re sitting together, watching the sun set, trying not to be mean to him.

“I’m not picking a fight with you,” you say. “This is nice enough.”

“It’s not even my wedding.”

“Okay.” You glance at him again, letting words flow without a single thought. “I’ll be even nicer to you on your wedding day then.”

You don’t know where that even came from, but something aches the very second the words leave your mouth. The thought of him getting married one day makes you just nauseous, even though you always knew that it was a possibility. It might even be inevitable.

You clear your throat, waving the sullen feeling away. Your body shivers then, even after the added warmth of his jacket. Maybe you’re not shivering because of the cold anymore.

He doesn’t say anything, but you can feel his eyes linger on the side of your face. The both of you keep tiptoeing around an elephant that follows you wherever you go. 

You hug your knees close to your chest, watching the blue sky melt into the golden horizon, splattered with ribbons of cotton candy clouds.

You want to scooch closer to him and have him wrap his arm around your shoulders. This isn’t the spot where you used to draw your names in the sand, enveloped in a giant heart like two lovesick kids, but wouldn’t it be nice to imagine that it is?

“I was always really happy here,” you mumble to yourself.

You were, truly. This city was your pocket of hope, your piece of peace.

Being here brings back so many memories.

It’s the same feeling you get every time you pass by somewhere you used to live. The nostalgia of walking down the same road you used to walk every day until your shoes wore out. The familiarity of your surroundings. The bittersweetness of looking into a past you cannot hold anymore, of remembering the person you were at a certain period in your life, of knowing the things you do now that you didn’t back then.

You long for things you cannot change.

Nostalgia only grows stronger with time, you can always count on that.

He hums in agreement, before admitting quietly, “I miss you.” One pulls, the other pushes. The water wavers, like it’s touched by his words, simple but earnest. You’re touched too, somewhere in your heart, where you know you should be writing someone else’s name now.

Should?

“You’re pushing it,” you say softly.

“I know.”

You look at him. Maybe it’s because you’re back in the city that holds only good memories of you two. Maybe you’re hypnotized by the way the pink and purple hues kiss his side profile, making him feel like a fever dream and not someone you loved. Maybe it’s the cold, making you yearn for any source of warmth. But instead of returning his sentiment, you say, “It’ll pass.”

He meets your eyes. There’s something pleading in his gaze. All things pass eventually. Time moves forward, people move on. Bad things will pass sooner or later. Your worst heartbreak, your most arduous trials, your saddest moments, they will all pass.

And good things… good things will have to pass too, whether you like it or not.

Your fingers twitch from where they’re still holding onto your body. You itch to reach for his hand. You don’t tell him what he wants to hear, even though here’s a part of you that wants to say it back. In a better world, you would be telling him I love you too, instead of having to suppress an I miss you too.

“All things have to pass eventually. This will too.”

[20:05] Taebear 🐻: we could go to that bar near the gallery. Y/N likes the cocktails there [20:06] Mimi 🐥: kay kay [20:06] Mimi 🐥: soooooo next friday? [20:09] Mimi 🐥: why is y/n reading our messages. shouldn’t she be at dinner [20:09] You: i approve of the bar choice [20:11] You: if you didn’t want me reading your messages, you shouldn’t have sent them to the gc [20:11] You: and if you must know, i’m skipping dinner. i’m avoiding Jungkook’s mom [20:12] Mimi 🐥: understandable. i figured you would do that [20:13] Mimi 🐥: how’s it going? are we regretting going yet? i told you to just stay home and we could binge watch the office together [20:15] You: and EYE told you that you could be a good friend and go to this wedding with me but nooooo baby doesn’t like the cold [20:16] You: you could’ve visited your parents while you’re here you know. two birds with one stone [20:18] Mimi 🐥: babes my parents stayed with me for a whole month last month. i reached my quota for family face time  [20:19] You: son and friend of the year 👏 [20:20] Mimi 🐥: 😎😎😎😘

[20:22] Taebear 🐻: hey [20:23] You: uh oh. am i in trouble? why is this not in the gc? [20:25] Taebear 🐻: lol shut up [20:26] Taebear 🐻: you okay? [20:28] You: feels like that could’ve been a perfectly good question to ask in the gc [20:29] Taebear 🐻: because it’s a serious question and we both know Jimin can’t be serious for one minute to save his life [20:32] You: why does it have to be a serious question? 🤪 [20:32] Taebear 🐻: 😕 [20:33] You: stop pouting. i’m fine [20:35] Taebear 🐻: are you? [20:36] You: i am! you don’t have to go all mama bear on me [20:39] Taebear 🐻: ha ha ha. you’re so funny [20:40] Taebear 🐻: want me to call you? [20:42] You: i said i’m fiiiiiine 🙄 [20:43] You: but also no because i told everyone i was tired and i’m pretending to be asleep in my room right now [20:43] Taebear 🐻: okay [20:43] Taebear 🐻: did you eat something at least? [20:44] You: i have a cup ramen in my room [20:45] Taebear 🐻: okay [20:46] Taebear 🐻: how was today? did JK make you wanna strangle him? [20:48] You: okay Kim Taehyung at least act like you have some faith in your friend lol [20:50] You: but mmmmmm it was ok. he was mostly behaving himself [20:51] Taebear 🐻: mostly? [20:54] You: we were down at the beach and he just told me he missed me out of the blue [20:55] You: Mimi is asking why no one is replying to him  [20:57] Taebear 🐻: i can see that [20:58] Taebear 🐻: what did you tell JK? [21:01] You: i quoted fleabag to him [21:09] Taebear 🐻: i had to google that [21:10] Taebear 🐻: i still don’t know what that means [21:11] You: i know you don’t lol. you’re adorable [21:11] You: i’ll tell you when i get back.  [21:13] You: ok bye i have to sleep early or i’ll look like ass in the morning [21:14] Taebear 🐻: oh. okay [21:15] Taebear 🐻: sleep tight. remember not to gorge yourself on booze tomorrow [21:17] You: thanks for the reminder. love you mom 🙄💕 [21:17] Taebear 🐻: :) [21:20] Taebear 🐻: you won’t look like ass btw

You clocked out right after you told Taehyung that you would. It wasn’t a peaceful sleep though. The anxiety simmering in your belly woke you up a few times throughout the night. You don’t even know why you were anxious. It’s not like you were the one who was about to walk down the aisle.

When morning finally came and you managed to untangle yourself from the surprising comfort of your familiar bed, you practically dragged your feet for the subsequent two hours, trying to get ready. As if that would actually slow down the passage of time.

You had to compartmentalize the things you needed to do in a mental checklist. Makeup. Hair. Dress. Stare at yourself in the mirror for half an hour and internally freak out while waiting for Jungkook to come get you from your room.

Now you’re sitting in the wedding hall, watching people filter into the room. It’s not even a lot of people, but you’re still overwhelmed regardless.

You feel so exposed, even though he’s the only one looking at you in this room of strangers. He’s been looking at you like that ever since he first saw you this morning, in a dress that you got just days before the wedding. You still don’t know if it’s entirely appropriate for your ex-boyfriend’s brother’s wedding - maybe a bit revealing - but it was the only one you could find on such short notice.

When you tried on the dress for Taehyung and Jimin a few days ago, Taehyung said you looked beautiful. Jimin said you looked decent, “six point five out of ten,” which translated to “pretty nice” in Jimin-lingo. That would’ve been enough if you were going to any other wedding, not one where Jungkook would also be attending.

You had wanted him to see you and regret ever leaving you.

It was a silly thought, just a tad adolescent.

You had wanted him to see you in your dress and be consumed with thoughts of you until he couldn’t even see straight. To be the only thing on his mind, you didn’t think it was a lot to ask for.

That was before he told you not to think about it and you’d been convinced to just go with the flow just for two days. It was before he actually did see you earlier today in your dress - a simple midnight blue satin cowl neck with a slit in the thigh - but you were the one rendered helpless and speechless. He had stared at you for a minute when he came to walk you down from your room, then he’d said, all breathless even though both of you were just standing there, “You’re beautiful.”

You’re beautiful, not You look beautiful.

You don’t know why, but you appreciated it.

It made your cheeks burn underneath your artificial rosy blush. Stupid, you thought to yourself when you two made your way to the main hall. Stupid for letting yourself get dizzy because of a single compliment from him.

You’re seated with his parents, which makes sense because you don’t know anybody here except for them. Well, maybe you know one of his cousins whose kid you and Jungkook used to babysit whenever their family was in the city, but you doubt that he even remembers you anymore.

When the ceremony begins, your heart instantly feels like it’s about to drop to the pit of your stomach.

You can’t lie to yourself. It stings.

It stings just sitting here next to his parents like a daughter-in-law, like a member of their family, watching his brother solidify his happy ending.

It stings that Jungkook is standing up there, looking as handsome as ever, but his eyes aren’t on the couple. They keep flickering to you no matter how much you try to pretend that they don’t.

It stings that even though you don’t think about marriage often - or maybe you just don’t allow yourself to - you can’t deny that the thought does cross your mind from time to time. Any time that you’d wander the corridors inside your head, you’d pass the doors that you keep unopened on purpose but there’s always that one door marked with a bright red X that you can never sidestep.

You watch Junghyun and Sooji with their teary smiles and shaky hands, shaky but happy. There’s a sudden clarity that this could’ve been you and him in another life. Forever is a lie, but you would’ve perjured yourself a thousand times for him. I do - you would’ve meant it.

You imagine yourself in Sooji’s place, and Jungkook, standing right on the other side, holding both your hands in his. A beautiful and radiant bride terrified of the altar. A dashing groom with a smile that could rival the sun and shoulders weighing heavier than he lets on.

It would’ve looked clumsy, but it could’ve been right.

You wonder if he’s wondering the same thing. Maybe he is. You hope he is.

When the ceremony ends with a kiss shared between the newlyweds, you wipe away the tears that well up in your eyes. The people around you do the same thing, but they’re doing it for the right reason, out of genuine joy for the happy couple. You don’t think you can say the same for yourself.

Some of the bridesmaids fawn over him. It’s reasonable, you suppose. One tends to do that in the presence of Jeon Jungkook.

You watch as they come up to him one by one to ask him to dance, watch as he politely declines until they’re all stalking away with similar pouts on their faces. You watch him until his eyes lock on you, sitting at a table near the back, nursing a glass of champagne.

He weaves himself with ease through the people making their way to the dance floor. When he’s in front of you, he holds out a hand.

“Dance with me?” he asks, his doe eyes working overtime to lure you in with their sparkles, though you’d rather stay here where you can easily go unnoticed until the night ends. “One song?”

“I don’t know how,” you say, even as you’re taking his hand and standing up.

“I showed you how, remember?”

“That was a long time ago.”

He squeezes you reassuringly. “Just follow my lead,” he says, walking the both of you to the floor. “C’mon.”

Once the music starts, your heels stomp on his feet at least three times before you start finding the beat to move along to. Muscle memory, or whatever, is bullshit. You remember absolutely nothing of what he showed you.

You’re grateful that the song is slow, because it makes it easier for you to follow the beat with your two left feet. He takes one of your hands in his, the other settling on the small of your back, guiding you to move in a steady rhythm.

You feel his mother’s eyes on the two of you, because she must be somewhere nearby, watching you like a hawk. You feel his gaze on your face while you keep yours on the knot of his tie, just trying to keep your composure and to not step on his feet with your heels.

The blur of white that you catch from the periphery of your vision makes you turn your head. Sooji and Junghyun are close by, swaying together slowly to the soft music, both of them glowing with happiness. She must sense your eyes on her, because she lifts her gaze up to meet yours. She smiles at the sight of you and Jungkook, and you smile back, because you don’t know how else to respond to that.

You don’t say it, but you do think it. Your fingers tighten around his hand ever so slightly.

Could that have been us?

If the answer is yes, then it would hurt.

If the answer is no, then it would hurt.

The point of your story is that it’s painful however you choose to look at it. There’s no other way to frame it. It’s just painful, because you’re never going to get any of it back.

You bite your lip, then turn away from the happy couple but you still don’t look at Jungkook. You look at your hand in his, and that’s when you see it.

“How’d you get that?” you ask, gently tracing the inch of slightly raised skin on his knuckles. You never noticed the scar until now.

“It was four years ago, I think? After Taehyung and I almost got into a fight, I went outside and… punched a wall,” he says, wincing as he recalls the memory.

His answer takes you aback. “You and Taehyung got into a fight?”

“Almost,” he corrects. “It was a long time ago. Didn’t they tell you?”

“No, they didn’t say anything. What happened?”

“Nothing happened.”

“If it was really nothing, you wouldn’t have punched a wall.” You frown. It makes you miss a few beats, but the song isn’t what’s important now, even if Jungkook is still trying to steer you back into the dance. “Taehyung isn’t violent. You aren’t violent.”

“I’m serious,” he says finally. “It’s nothing. We were just drunk and stupid.”

You know there must be more to it, that something must have happened or been said to trigger such a reaction from both of them. But you also know that you won’t probably get anything out of Jungkook if he doesn’t want to tell you.

You give up, for now. “Fine. If you say so.”  You’ll just have to weasel it out of Jimin later.

The song comes to an end, before another one comes on. If Jungkook remembers that he only asked for one song, maybe he’s counting his blessings that you’re still here and dancing with him, because he doesn’t mention it.

For some reason, you pull your hand away from his, only to slide up his shoulder to lock both of your hands behind his neck. He seems surprised, but he does the same around your waist.

Jungkook’s gaze flickers to your lips briefly, then back to your eyes again. You find yourself doing the same and wonder what he tastes like after all the time you’ve been apart. Is he still as sweet as you remember? You used to tease that it was because of the excessive sugar he put in everything, but you knew it was really just him. The few inches between you are so inviting that it’s practically tempting you to close the gap. You could, easily in fact. Blame it on one too many glasses of champagne later if you want.

He looks younger like this, like the boy you loved, starry eyes and dimpled smile. His shoulders are always the most comfortable resting place, the crook of his neck your long lost home. This is nice, you think, to see him again even though it feels like a fever dream. Memories of your first date, your first kiss, come to life before your eyes so realistically that you could almost touch them.

Loved? That sounds funny to you.

The people you used to be, souls wrapped in innocence, when the world was nothing but the arms of the person you loved. You reach out, and the memories quickly fade from view. The only trace they leave behind is a speck of gold on your fingertips, a memento of charming naiveté for you to tuck neatly away in the corner of your mind, but also a reminder that ah, they only exist in the locket of your heart now. Because he has changed, and you think you must have too. Life, as they say, goes on.

“We made it. Kind of. That’s crazy,” you find yourself saying.

“Did we?”

“You don’t think so?” you chuckle. “We’re in a group chat with the Kim Seokjin who spams it with bad jokes on a daily basis. I’d call that a win.”

That makes him laugh. “If you put it like that, yeah, maybe. Sure.”

Other people might be fooled, but it doesn’t sound at all convincing to you. The light doesn’t really reach his eyes. You bite the inside of your cheek, thinking of how to translate the sudden poignant turn of the moment.

“It isn’t everything you hoped it’d be?” you ask.

His shoulders rise then fall quickly in a second-long shrug. “I thought it would make me feel more… fulfilled. But it doesn’t. Not really.”

The way he says it and the way he’s looking at you makes your heart dive. You understand what he means. You’re good at what you do, and you don’t need reassurance from anyone to recognize that. But sometimes, it doesn’t feel like it’s enough. Doesn’t feel like it’s real, like it’s validated.

When you landed your first big project, even before Yoongi, you were so proud of yourself. You were bursting with excitement but you weren’t happy, and you knew what the reason was. Something was missing that couldn’t be filled, not even with all your friends’ hundreds of messages of encouragement. 

It’s beyond stupid, this feeling like your wins amount to nothing at all just because of one person. You wanted him there to celebrate every achievement with you and he wasn’t, and the milestones seemed incomplete without the presence of him. It doesn’t feel like you’ve accomplished anything because this always used to be a dream you thought you’d make come true together.

“It’s lonely,” he concludes.

It sounds like he feels the same way, like he wanted you to be there too.

He suddenly holds you tighter than you think he needs to, like he’s afraid to let go of you. You imagine that he doesn’t want to let go of you, and it makes you feel better for a second. But it doesn’t change the fact that he still did in the end. And he will have to when this ends.

What was the point of this? Why did he bring this upon yourselves when he seems to be as hurt as you are? All of this time, all of these years, lost to what? You could’ve been happy together but instead, you were both lost and miserable.

When the music stops - you lost count of how many songs it’s been - you pull away from him. He looks disappointed, maybe even a little hurt for some reason.

“I’m gonna get some air,” you say, already turning away from him.

“Y/N-”

“I need some air.” Then you’re weaving through the dancing couples despite Jungkook calling your name. How did he manage it? How did he not look back when you called out for him?

You hastily grab your coat on the way out. It’s not going to keep you warm, but that’s not something you’re even remotely concerned with.

It’s everywhere, you feel it down to your bones.

The wind wraps itself tightly around you, intertwining in your hair, slipping through the cracks of your fingers, caressing your face in a chilling touch. You greet the cold like a long lost sister, shivering violently with nostalgia. It was there for you more than your own flesh and blood.

Is that why you like the sea at night? Because it reminds you of mom?

It’s dark out here, barely anything is visible except for a lighthouse sending out light in the quiet of the night. You can’t see much, but you can certainly hear it. You’re not sure if the music is coming from inside the venue, or if it’s still ringing in your ears. It’s probably the latter; you’re too far away to be able to catch the music anyway. But regardless, the tune is quickly drowned out by the sea.

The waves crash violently against the shore like it’s out for blood. There’s a magnetic pull, as if it’s calling out for you. You want to go to it, to reach out and feel the cold outside of your body for once, but you stay there despite your legs itching to stand up and run straight ahead. Into the water and down under.

You could lie down and close your eyes for a moment. The sound of the water, as sharp and brutal as it is, nurtures a part of you somehow.

You just want to be alone. You don’t want to talk to Taehyung, or Jimin, or even Yoongi.

Oh.

Yoongi.

It’s a terrible feeling, knowing that you’re going to hurt Yoongi. Knowing that you’re going to kill this even before it has a chance to truly begin.

Truth be told, you can’t envision a future with Yoongi. There isn’t anything wrong with him, because he’s not the problem here. Yoongi is fun, he’s considerate, he keeps things light on purpose for you, until you’re ready to initiate something more serious. He’s good for you, even Taehyung thinks so.

But you can’t love Yoongi, not in the way that he wants you to. Not more than you love Jungkook.

There you go. Ruining things again.

Did you ruin Jungkook? Is that what happened?

The layers on you are no match for the sea at night. The wind hisses relentlessly, biting at any part of your skin that’s exposed.

It takes you back to that night. Almost everything does, actually.

Maybe that’s why you never even stopped to consider starting anything with anyone, because it always ends. If there’s a beginning, then there will be an inevitable ending. Love isn’t made to last and you aren’t meant to carry love with you. You’ve been abandoned twice. If it happens a third time, it’s a pattern, and then your hypothesis will only be proven. That the problem here is you.

You’d be lying if you said you haven’t wondered when it’ll finally be Taehyung’s turn to leave. He eventually will, right? That one’s gonna hurt.

Then, you’re startled when someone calls your name.

“What’s wrong?” Jungkook asks. The wind and the waves masked the sound of his footsteps walking up to you. When you turn around to face him, his eyes grow worried, almost panicked. “Why are you crying?”

You breathe out irritatedly before you hastily wipe at your cheeks. You didn’t even realize that you’d been crying. “Nothing’s wrong. I’m fine,” you say, though you both know it’s a lie. “I’m just tired. I’m going up to my room.”

He catches your wrist in a firm grip when you try to walk away. You wish he’d just leave you alone, but you knew he wouldn’t drop it just like that.

“I said I’m fine,” you insist.

“You were crying,” he says. “Did I do something wrong?”

He didn’t, at least not tonight.

God, you really don’t want to do this right now.

“Jungkook,” you warn. “Let go of me.”

You try to free yourself from his grip, hoping that he’ll get the hint and back off for now. Instead, he pulls you into his chest, where you struggle to escape from his hold until you realize your efforts are futile. He takes the wind’s place, wound tightly around you, so tightly that it’s nearly impossible for you to move.

You hiss out his name, but he doesn’t budge. 

“Jungkook, can you just- Fuck!”

Damn him.

You realize he’s not giving up, which in turn makes you give up struggling, hoping that if you let this be a moment, then it’ll be something that can pass.

You’re just standing there, letting him hold you, letting yourself be held by the person who broke you in the first place. This feels exactly like where you’re supposed to be - in his arms, with your face hidden in the crook of his neck, his gentle fingers stroking your hair. There’s not a lot that you could do but lean into that feeling the same way you lean into him. One foot in the sand, one foot in the past. A hand on the doorknob of time, wondering if you should look back or look forward.

You want to be alone, but that never used to apply with him.

The wind stills, the sea calms. You remain unmoving too, locked in his embrace. You feel the faint rhythm of his heart, beating faster than you think it should. If you could, you would bottle this moment up and live there forever.

I miss you, you think.

I miss you.

I miss you.

I miss you.

Then your arms are around him too. It only makes him hold you tighter, and all you can think about is how much you miss him, how painful it is to miss him, how you feel like you’re being pulled apart at the seams from the weight of missing him. 

Fuck.

Can you pretend that the last few years never happened? Is there a higher power that would allow you to go back to the night before that wretched Wednesday, when everything was still perfect? Hundreds of days of your life, can you pretend that it was just one long nightmare? When you wake up, you’ll be back in his humble apartment, tangled up together in his bed. Warm sunlight, your silken youth, and him. It was all you ever needed.

Again with the devastating familiarity. The city, the beach. His mother’s warmth that always made you reminisce about your own mother’s coldness. How Jungkook used to find you in moments like this and just stayed by your side until the dejection passed. He understood that he could never understand it the way you did.

You hear yourself sniffle, then you feel him press a kiss into your hair. Home is comforting.

Oh, you never want to leave.

You don’t want to leave, and that’s terrifying.

You allow yourself to stay there for one more second - one endless second - so you could commit to memory what it’s like to be with him. Back and forth. It’s always so easy to fall into him.

Jungkook releases you when he feels you loosen after a while, and you reluctantly meet his eyes as he tilts your head to face him.  His fingers cradling your jaw, how warm and delicate they feel on your skin.

You swallow thickly, your mind going blank. He’s the only person you see, the only one that matters. His eyes flicker south, and even then you don’t make any move to run away, despite his loose grip on your waist telling you that you can if you want to.

You told him that it would pass, and maybe for him, it will. For him, it’s the city and the moment, making him feel like he’s caught up in a page that he’s turned over a long time ago. He was fine with leaving, and he’s been fine without you. It will pass for him, as much as it hurts you to admit it.

But not for you. For you, there’s only him. There’s nobody else but him. It’s always been him, no matter how hard you try to tell yourself that there will be another person you can love as much as you love Jungkook. You might only be a page, perhaps even a chapter, in the story of his life, but he’s your entire book. He’s volume after volume after volume, until he takes up the whole shelf and leaves no room for anything else, not even for yourself.

And now here he is - at the biggest turn in your career.

He’s a bad blood cell you can’t ever get rid of.

You’ll never be able to truly let go of him. How could you? When you truly love someone, those feelings will carry on forever. They’ll always have a piece of your heart despite an ending. When you look back on a certain period in your life, you’ll think to yourself, You’ll always be a part of me. I loved you then.

But Jungkook is a force of nature. He has your whole heart.

Years and years from now, when you look back on your life, you know you’ll see him everywhere. Even when you’re old and gray, and when faces all just blur together in a mosaic of broken memories and long lost youth, you know you’ll still remember him - the person you loved, the one whom you let slip through your fingers. The great love of your life when you were young.

Sometimes, you regret that day. You can’t help feeling like it was your fault too. Maybe you should’ve tried harder to keep him. You should’ve fought harder, should’ve held onto him instead of standing there and watching him leave.

He lit the match, and you let the house burn. It takes two to tango, two to break a heart.

You’re quick to let people leave. Oh, how you wish it could be that easy to let them go too.

It isn’t until your eyes mimic the flicker of his gaze that he leans in. You meet him halfway. For the first time in years, you feel like you could breathe, truly breathe. It’s achingly slow, like neither of you can believe that this is happening. 

You sigh against his mouth when his tongue brushes your bottom lip, slips past the seal to devour you. It feels like a perfect dream. You could stay in this bubble with him forever, pretend that you’re the only two people who exist in the world and there’s nothing else, no one else, waiting for you in a city that seems so far away right now. The thought of him never left you, not even for a second. He’s always been with you everywhere you go, no matter what you do, always in the back of your mind.

He tastes like your youth, like remembrance. He kisses you like he’s still yours when deep down you know that you’re still his. The hand on your jaw is gentle but firm, and it makes you repeat a thought, I miss you.

Then a feeling, I love you.

Not then. Now.

I love you now.

I love you even when I shouldn’t. Even when it hurts. Even when you leave me. Even when you don’t love me more than I love you. If there comes a day where you love somebody else, I will still love you then. There will never be another person for me but you. My first and only love.

When he pulls away, you think it’s too quick, even though your lungs are grateful for the breath that you instantly inhale. You stare at his lips like you’re in a daze, mesmerized, wanting to chase them again. You don’t even know how you have it in yourself to utter these next words, but you hear your own voice saying them anyway.

You’re holding onto him now. Doesn’t that count?

“Let’s…” Your fingers tighten on the collar of his dress shirt. “Let’s go up to your room.”

note (2): so... what do we think?? will they?? won't they?? 😵 stay tuned for obs7.5 which will be dropping 29.09.2023! also i'm gonna pause obs muse asks for a little bit! 😬

all rights reserved © jeonqkooks. reposting, translating and/or modifying is not permitted by any means. [posted september 24, 2023]

[jessicaloons]

Masterlist - Invisible String

Charles Leclerc. Lizzie Doetterer. Childhood best friends. But maybe even more…

New Chapters every Sunday (or rather I try to upload every Sunday 🙈)!

I’m starting a taglist. If you want to be added to it, drop a comment!

Meet the characters down below!

Chapters:

1. Just to learn that my dreams aren’t rare

2. Hold on to the memories, they will hold on to you

3. I have this thing where I get older, but just never wiser

4. Saying goodbye is death by a thousand cuts

5. Goodbye, Goodbye, Goodbye, you were bigger than the whole sky

6. Because these things will change, can you feel it now?

7. All that bloodshed, crimson clover…

8. I can tell that it’s gonna be a long road

9. And when we go crashing down we come back every time

10. You been stressed out lately. Yeah, me too

11. ‘Cause it’s all over, it’s not meant to be

12. They think that it’s over but it’s just begun

13. But I come back stronger than a ‘90s trend

14. And it’s coming over you like it’s all a big mistake

15. You can see it with the lights out: You are in love

16. The devil’s in the details, but you got a friend in me

17. But there was one prize I’d cheat to win

18. You learn my secrets and you figure out why I’m guarded

19. Kiss me on the sidewalk, take away the pain

20.1 Ask me what I learned from all those years

20.2 Ask me what I earned from all those tears

21. I had the shiniest wheels, now they’re rusting

22. ‘Cause baby, now we got bad blood, You know it used to be mad love

23.1 Freedom felt like summer then, on the coast

23.2 Freedom felt like summer then, on the coast

24. Every time you call me crazy I get more crazy

25. The world moves on, another day another drama

26. I swear I don’t love the drama, it loves me

27. But the story of us might be ending soon

28. I can't find a pulse, my heart won't start anymore

29. 'Cause you kiss me and it stops time

30. It was the end of a decade, but the start of an age

31. I watched it begin again

32. Don’t say I didn’t, say I didn’t warn ya

33. The rumours are terrible and cruel

34. My knuckles were bruised like violets

35. I’m standing on a tightrope, alone

36. I can do it with a broken heart

37. I think I am finally clean

38. You gotta step into the daylight and let it go

39. Don’t blame me, love made me crazy

40. And some things you just can’t speak about

41. I like shiny things, but I’d marry you with Paper Rings

42. Put it on the one people put wedding rings on

43. What if your eyes looked up and met mine, one more time?

44. Sometimes walking out is the one thing, that will find you the right thing

45. Just breathe, just relax, it’ll be OK

46. You play stupid Games, You win stupid Prizes

47. When the truth comes out, it’s quiet

48. Am I allowed to cry?

49. All's well that ends well to end up with you

50. All along there was some Invisible String tying you to me

51. And why I’ve spent my whole life trying to put it into words

52. Long live the walls we crashed through - I have the time of my life, with you

EPILOGUE

INVISIBLE STRING: FROM THE VAULT

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

BONUS 18+ MDNI!

Meet the character’s of Invisible String:

[xxnghtclls]

Permission

Chapter 48

(Chapter 47)

True Form Sukuna x Reader

Rating: Explicit

Warning: Graphic Depiction Of Violence

Please see Chapter 1 for tags!

Epilogue

Leaves and twigs crack under your feet, leaving trails and patterns on the snowy forest floor.

It’s night. Darkness interrupted by red, little sparks flying through the air. The stinging smell of smoke creeps into your nose. Remnants of the moonlight, far away, quietly shine through the branches of the trees, painting creepy shadows on the white canvas you’re walking on. The further you walk, the more those shadows dance on an orange tint, that starts to coat the snow, coming from a source, that you’ve set up not far away. Carefully, listening to the sounds of the forest, you walk back to that source.

A flame, a campfire. Right here, in the middle of the woods.

Step by step, you’re approaching that fire, holding wood in your arms to keep it burning. The sound of munching echoes in your ear, the sound of feasting, devouring.

It’s been years, since he liberated you. Unintentionally freed you from a miserable life in a miserable village.

Not knowing, what you were destined to become.

A destiny that no one foresaw.

Not even the King of Curses.

Coming closer, you can see the silhouette of your King, sitting on the very same tree he did a year ago.

When he waited night for night, waited for you to go back with him.

You start humming his melody, as your feet carry you back to the fireplace. The fireplace that made you fall in love with this monster, before you put the new wood down onto the ground.

And then, quietly, you turn to him, watching how he’s gnawing some meat off a bone, occasionally humming in satisfaction.

It’s been months, since you completed the ritual.

Since you’ve been killed and reborn and marked with a sign on the skin that covers your heart.

Months of being his and him being yours.

In the shrine you can now call home.

You look at him and smile softly to yourself, finding it cute how invested he is not to waste any meat that’s on that bone, although you have plenty left.

Sitting down on the log to the left of your King, you feel the warmth of his body on your skin and hear his gentle munching in your ear.

And you feel your love for him, still, despite putting you through all this. You lost your heart to him and, no matter what he did, you don’t want it back.

Ever again.

Asshole.

It’s been days since the both of you came back to this place.

A place you cherish in your heart.

And maybe, you hope, Sukuna cherishes it, too.

The crackling of the fire becomes louder and his noises quiet, making you both just sit there in silence, next to each other. He flicks the bare bone into the flames, before you gently lean against his shoulder, let your head quietly bump against him to be closer, feeling his calm breath beneath your soul.

And both of you just watch the fire in front of you, like you did so many times a year ago, when neither of you could express what’s going on.

Heartache.

It’s been seconds, since he let you know how he feels about you.

Although he never says them out loud, those three words that you’ve told him over and over again and still do.

But he doesn’t has to. Because, you know.

This curse.

So overwhelming, so consuming. Tying your souls together so tightly.

And some words don’t need to be spoken to be true.

Sukuna grabs another piece of meat and holds it under your nose. You cooked it yourself, with fresh herbs that you found earlier in the nearby bushes. It smells delicious. You lean back and sit straight again, before you grab the meat and take a bite.

It’s hot, warming you from the inside. You keep blowing and carefully gnawing and nibbling, until you finally can rip off a bigger piece. Feeling his bottom pair of eyes watching you constantly, you peek over to him quickly.

“What?” you ask with your mouth full, making him smirk, as he musters your stuffed cheeks and big eyes.

“Nothing.”

You pause your chewing, pondering.

“Is it how I eat?” you ask, already knowing the answer.

And he doesn’t respond, just keeps focusing on the fire, a hint of his smirk still decorating the corners of his mouth. The flames flicker in his red eyes, the orange light dances on his face and wrinkles. You can’t help to take them in, over and over again, although you already know his features so well, as if they’ve been imprinted on your eyelids.

So beautiful.

You smile to yourself, before you focus back on your meal, until you throw the remaining bone into the fire. Satisfied, you sigh, until you swallow the last bite you took.

Suddenly, something cold gently falls upon on your forehead and you look up. Delicate flakes of fresh snow are illuminated against the dark canvas of the night, falling down right upon you and Sukuna.

You smile softly, before you turn your head to look at him. He’s looking up into the sky, too and you witness, just in time, how a small flake lands on the tip of his nose, melting in an instant. You huff lovingly, before you gently touch that very spot with your finger. More flakes follow, landing on his mask, his eyebrows and lashes, before he opens his mouth, trying to bite your finger that’s resting on his nose.

Clack.

His teeth close around nothing and you quickly retrieve your hand to poke him into his shoulder instead.

Hard.

It makes his lip twitch, before he leans down to you, close to your face, cocking his eyebrow.

“Harder.” he whispers with a smirk, with this… undertone.

And you blush, remembering it’s what you moaned into his ear last night.

When you felt cold and the fire was not enough to warm your moving bodies.

When your skins and limbs and lips were intertwined, like those of lovers are.

When you kissed each other and hold each other dearly, when your hearts started to miss each other and their embrace.

“Are you sure?” you mumble, trying to keep composure. His gentle eyes roam over your face, scan how your delicate skin rushes full of extra heat.

And then he nods, almost unnoticeable, almost hypnotised, as his gaze falls down to your lips.

The string on your heart pulls you in, let your breaths collide and mingle, until they merge, as you start kissing him on his soft lips while feeling small, freezing flakes fall upon your faces. He quietly sighs against your face and keeps squeezing on your beating heart, before you gently lick and suck on his tongue and bottom lip.

“Okay.” you breathe against his pretty mouth, your breath and heartbeat quickened. “Wait here.”

His pupils are blown, already drowning in your being, before you stand up and walk into the snow.

You feel his needy eyes bore into your back, the string on your heart pulling harshly.

To make you walk back to him, to devour your flesh once again. Like last night, like lovers do.

But first, you crouch down, shove some snow between your hands and form a ball. Then, with all your strength, you turn around and throw it at him. Sukuna leans back to dodge but-

Bam!

The snowball hits his shoulder with a wet impact, shattering in a million pieces.

And you gasp in victory, as you throw your arms up in the air.

“Ahhh hahahah!” you exclaim, before a wide grin spreads onto his lips and he flashes his teeth. A sadistic, aroused chuckle escapes his throat, as his eyes flicker right at you, as he slowly rises to his feet, cracking his neck and knuckles, before he growls in excitement.

“So, you wanna play?”

[dindjarinandlysakane]

The Sweetest Taste - Masterlist

When Din Djarin meets a beautiful cake seller from Nevarro, do you think he’s just going to stand back and let her suffer at the hands of her abusive boyfriend? After a lifetime of heartache and pain, Lysa Kane realises she’s not on her own any more and finds an unlikely friend in the Mandalorian. And Din Djarin does not like men who treat women like that, not one tiny bit. Friendship/comfort and maybe something more…

Chapter 1 - Lysa Kane

Chapter 2 - Indebted

Chapter 3 - A welcome delivery

Chapter 4 - Something sweet and sticky

Chapter 5 - A chaperone

Chapter 6 - Bruises

Chapter 7 - Trouble?

Chapter 8 - I was worried about you

Chapter 9 - So what are you going to do to get the girl?

Chapter 10 - Rescue

Chapter 11 - A breath apart

Chapter 12 - Rain

Chapter 13 - The Storm

Chapter 14 - Inquisition

Chapter 15 - Seeing red

Chapter 16 - A plea

Chapter 17 - Like a beaten dog

Chapter 18 - So you're in love?

Chapter 19 - "Mando!"

Chapter 20 - Hushed voices

Chapter 21 - A wolf

Chapter 22 - Not anymore

Chapter 23 - A single shot

Chapter 24 - A poorer man

Chapter 25 - You should stay

Chapter 26 - The Window Ledge

Chapter 27 - Morning light

Chapter 28 - Bickering

Chapter 29 - Protective

Chapter 30 - A line in the sand

Chapter 31 - Fresh bread and a shared bed

Chapter 32 - In the stillness of the morning

Chapter 33 - A failure

Chapter 34 - I need you

Chapter 35 - Aching for one another

Chapter 36 - Home

Chapter 37 - In the Quiet of the Night

Chapter 38 - And have you cramp my style?

Chapter 39 - The Colour of the Ocean

Chapter 40 - Long days & even longer nights

Chapter 41 - Ner cyar'ika

Chapter 42 - Fading into darkness

Chapter 43 - Missing

Chapter 44 - Nar Shaddaa

Chapter 45 - I was never yours to lose

Chapter 46 - Old friends

Chapter 47 - The Bridge

Chapter 48 - Upwards

Chapter 49 - Restless

Chapter 50 - What matters is that I met you

Chapter 51 - Unspoken words

Chapter 52 - My kar'ta

Chapter 53 - Bacon

Chapter 54 - Mi-tah

& More...

If you would like to be tagged in this fic and receive updates when new chapters are posted just send me a message.

GIFS are not mine.

[gamergirlbonestaskforce141riot]

hey 🥰

you can do which ones you want/haven't answered yet!

1, 3, 4, 6, 7, 14, 18, 21, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 63, 65, 66, 67, 68, 98, 96, 99, 100

wow it's so many....but the prompts were too good. sorry for the bother, chose random ones dear ! <3

Who fell first? Who fell harder?

They are not sure (nor I, lol) of who fell first. Having interest for each other I think was more or less at the same time, but by the time they were sent to Belarus (chapters 6 to 9) they kinda knew it wasn't an innocent crush.

About who fell harder, they both are disgustingly deep in it. Like, eww disgusting.

3. What is their love language?

Acts of service for both of them, and also quality time together, and once they're perfectly comfortable with each other, physical touch. Physical touch like you wouldn't believe, they can't get their hands off each other.

4. Already answered here <3

6. Who would ask the "would you love me if I were a worm?" question? How would their S/O answer?

Oh, definitely Riot, just to mess with him. All serious and all. Like...

''Would you love me if I were a worm?''

Ghost raised his head from his paperwork, unsure if he heard correctly.

''What?''

Riot looked at him, resting her chin on her crossed arms on his desk, staring at him while he tried to finish his paperwork. Her stack was already done and neatly put aside.

''Would you...''

''Why would you be a worm?''

''That's not what I asked''

''Well, I'm asking''

''Answer the question!''

''Why would you be a worm!?''

''I don't know! Would you love me if I were a worm or not!?''

''For fuck's sake, bloody hell, yes I would!'' Grumbling, he returned to the last report. ''Fucking hell...''

''And would you...''

''YES, FOR FUCK'S SAKE''

7. Who likes forehead kisses? Who likes hand kisses? Who likes neck kisses?

Neck kisses: both of them, but Ghost prefers giving them and Riot prefers receiving them. The back of her nape and her inner wrists are very sensitive.

Forehead kisses: both of them, but Riot prefers giving them and Ghost likes both giving them and receiving them, when he's trying to sleep or they are cuddling and he has his head on her chest.

Hand kisses: No preference, except that her inner wrists are really sensitive and she starts trembling if he kisses her there. It's a good way to shut her up, that and the back of her neck

14. What is something they argue about constantly? Is it a deep-seated issue or something small?

They have a surprisingly healthy relationship, and rarely argue.

Christine steals his hoodies constantly, exchanging them when they loose his smell. Simon pretends to be annoyed but loves it. And because she is always cold, when they are out and about he tries to make her wear his coat or his jacket. That makes her angry, both because she's worried he'll be cold and because he complains about her stealing his hoodies and now he's giving her his jacket?? For fuck's sake

18. They've had a major blowout. How do they handle it?

Both of them are conflict avoidant, Christine more than Simon. If they had a strong argument, they'd avoid each other for a bit, to calm down. But it wouldn't be long until one seeks the other out. They can't be apart.

21. Who typically tends to initiate intimacy first (this can be a conversation, action or anything)?

Depends on the mood, but both of them are more about action. With a look they understand quickly, or a lingering touch, or a longer kiss while cuddling. The most they talk is a "Need you"

33. Which one of them gives "that look" when they other is acting like a fool?

Both of them had bombastic side eye, but they rarely use it with each other. Maybe Riot more towards Ghost than the other way round, believe or not. Ghost in reality is a big troll, but nobody would believe it coming from him, so he takes advantage of it. She usually sees through his shit

34. How do they address a problem in their relationship?

I can't think of any right now, but I'm thinking about the (far) future, when they have an 'accident' and she falls pregnant. Both of them will freak out for a while, trying to decide what to do, both of them are terrified of being like their parents (they are married by then btw). So, at first avoidance and agony, then sit down to talk and get to a decision together

35. How does each significant other view any exes and former relationships?

Both of them have problems with jealousy and possessiveness. Not the type to be angry about exes and such (but they better not be on sight). It's most an out of sight out of mind mindset. They don't think or talk about it

36. What is something that would break their hearts?

Cheating (they'd never, but it would destroy them). Opening up to each other, with all the fear, doubts, and time invested in trying to heal, only to be cheated on... yeah, nope. Never happening.

37. Who is more likely to avenge their S/O if they were hurt or killed?

Both. Both would go scorched earth, full murderhobo. Funny that you asked this one HEHEHEH *evil laugh*

45. What's the worst thing the other can say to one?

They'd never lol but in her case, something along the lines of shut up (with a bad tone) or you're annoying (she knows she is). In his case, he's been through so much verbal abuse in his childhood/teenhood that his skin is thicker, but coming from her (or Price, Johnny or Kyle) anything would hurt more than expected.

46. If they were ever in a life or death situation, who risks their life?

It'd be a downright fight between them, because both would sacrifice for the other. Sooo, quite better if they use their stubborness to get out of the fray together, safe and sound, I think.

47. If it ever came down to it, who is turning to the darkside to save the other?

I mean, none of them are strangers to murder. So, the line is there and has been crossed before. If push came to shove, they'd stop at nothing to save each other. That's the reason why Captain Price doesn't assign her as Ghost's Sergeant (that's Soap). I mean, Ghost would save Johnny in a heartbeat too, but it wouldn't be as raw and primal.

48. If they ever had less that 5 mins to tell their S/O something before never seeing them again, what would they say?

''Thank you''

49. Is there a word or gesture that makes either of them melt?

Simon will learn quickly that kisses (or just the brush of his nose) on the back of her neck make Christine fold quickly. Also, her inner wrists. She could be ranting about anything, but if he grabs her hand and kisses her inner wrist, or hugs her from behind and starts nuzzling the back of her neck, she becomes putty in his hands. (It also works if she's raging against anyone, but in those cases Ghost simply grabs her by the back of her neck, kitten like, and steers her away, she goes from RAGE to n_n in seconds)

In public, Simon doesn't have weaknesses (nor would Christine take advantage of them). If the need arises to appease him somehow, it's only Price who can talk him down. But in private? He melts when Christine runs her fingers through his hair, he's out like a light and snoring in minutes. For him it's incredibly relaxing, it's something his mother used to do to help him fall asleep when he was a kid. Another thing she does that makes him wobbly in his knees is when she starts kissin his scars, one by one. If sitting on his lap, she'll cup his face in her hands and start mapping them with her kisses, and it makes him feel so loved that he's putty in her hands. Of course if there's no clothes involved and her 'investigation' continues throughout his numerous scars he won't complain.

50. Who's the romantic?

Christine, definitely. She pretends not to, and some things considered romantic make her cringe, but she is quite the dreamer although it's a very secret, very deep part of her. Her love language is acts of service, so if in love, it evolves into learning what Simon likes and trying to keep stocked the tea he likes, the snacks he likes (or she'll just bake it, like custard), etc etc

Simon is more pragmatic, and a man, so he just... doesn't think about it. Sometimes the bulb will light up and he'll get her flowers, or tickets for some ballet she likes (either for her and Olga to go together, or he'll suffer through it if Nikolai gets involved). But although he is very considerate, and very sincere with his feelings, it's just not who he is.

63. How would they describe one another in bed?

Christine, about him: 'Heaven'

Simon, about her: 'Heaven'

65. Who tends to take the lead in intimate encounters?

Again, depends on the mood, but I'd say Ghost 60% Riot 40%. He's by nature more dominant (and she likes it), and both of them are touch starved (him for longer), but she is by nature a bit more bashful with these things. She's always worried about her stretch marks, her scars, her belly, her rolls, etc etc and he doesn't give a damn, he just wants to feel her skin against his, her heartbeat under his palm, her softness around him.

66. Have they ever been caught in the act? What would be their reaction if they were?

LMAO Christine would die. Simon would be flustered, but he gives less of a damn tbh. But she'd be terribly embarrassed (that doesn't mean the idea doesn't give them a bit of a thrill... but with the security of a locked door lol). But no, they havent been caught.

67. Have they ever done it anywhere questionable?

HEEEEHHHEHEHEHEHHEHEHEHEHEH. The 141 common room. Heather's office is off limits although sometimes they hide there to cuddle or nap. Price's office isn't off the cards, Ghost just needs to be pissed at him. Ghost's office has definitely been 'christened'. The sergeant's office is riskier because Soap, Gaz and Riot share it. The gym's showers late at night.

68. Who is more vocal? Who is more experienced?

Well, I guess this is about sexual experience, so Ghost would be more experienced. I'm always talking about consensual experiences! He's older, and before Roba he had his one night stands and brief flings, but nothing serious, he was too busy with his career and keeping his brother afloat. Riot is demisexual so unless there's an emotional connection no sex for her part, so, little experience.

About who's more vocal, I touch this more in the nsfw headcanons, but at first none of them think of themselves particularly vocal. She feels so embarrassed making sounds, he's just too focused on her, on hearing her. With time and trust, she discovers (to her horror and his delight) that she can be quite vocal, and he discovers (to his horror/amusement and her absolute delight) that if she's topping or going down on him, he becomes a right mess. Also, he swears a lot.

96. Who reads the newspaper? Who wants to see the cartoons?

Depends on the cartoons lol... if it's good anime, Christine is all over it. Might try to introduce him to it (he didn't partake much in nerd shit when he was a kid). So I guess he'd be the one with the newspaper.

98. Who would burn the world down for who?

Both, for each other. Down to ashes. No questions asked. They're stupid like that.

99. Who gives off "they said no pickles" energy?

Definitely Riot, lol. For herself she wouldn't complain, but for him? Full attittude. With good manners, but fire in her eyes. How dare they mess up his order.

Ghost tends to avoid ordering at places because he doesn't like speaking with people, so he leaves it to Price or whoever is with him. He's just there to carry the tray, so to speak. But God forbid someone makes her drink too hot for her to be able to drink it

100. Make a meme of this ship.

courtesy of @eenochian who is the best ever and made several more that will have their own post lmao

[thgfanfictionlibrary]

Teen and Up Rated Fics Masterlist (48)

Part 1- Part 38 / Part 39 / Part 40 / Part 41 / Part 42 / Part 43 / Part 44 / Part 45 / Part 46 / Part 47 / 

Created: March 24th, 2024

Last Checked:—-

That's How You Change the World-Geekymoviemom (ao3)  Summary: Following his flogging in the Square, Katniss tells Peeta a story to help him sleep. A short companion piece to By Your Side, set following chapter 34. This was originally published in the charity collection A Candle for the Caribbean, which raised over $4000 to benefit islands devastated by Hurricane Maria in 2017. That Time We Took Over the World-Gamemakers (ao3)  Summary: Being a session guitarist pays well, but Katniss Everdeen’s always wanted a taste of the spotlight. Enter Peeta Mellark, whose boyband fame faded twenty years ago, and a not-quite-dying wish from an old friend, and she’s in for way more than she bargained for. The B Word-Xerxia (ao3)  Summary: From a Tumblr prompt 'I wish you would write a fic where ... katniss is like gordon ramsay in kitchen nightmares' (I've edited the prompt here for brevity) The First Smile-geekymoviemom (ao3)  Summary: The first smile is such a sweet moment in baby's life. Suddenly everything you do for him seems worth it. The Fog-hutchabelle (ao3)  Summary: The Capitol hijacked Peeta. Primrose Everdeen is anxious to help him recover and rediscover his love for her sister. To Prim’s surprise, Peeta doesn’t seem nearly as interested in Katniss as he does in someone else. Prompt: What if? The Interview-Xerxia (ao3)  Summary: This has all of the makings of the most uncomfortable job interview of all time. The Lightning Tree-Grace_d (ao3)  Summary: At night, I wake screaming of mutts and hot, bloody rain. After Prim reassures me it’s not real and drops back to sleep, I trace my fingers over the paper dandelion on my wall. I remind myself of the things I know are true, improbable as they seem. That I’m not concussed or crazy. That my life is about to catch fire, as sure as the arena did after I shot that arrow, but maybe this time I won’t get burnt. The Only Time We've Got-FanficAllergy, RoseFyre (ao3)  Summary: In a world remarkably similar to Damaged, Broken, and Unhinged, Darius makes a different choice. And it will make all the difference. A minimalist AU of an AU. Because every author is allowed to be self-indulgent. The Parting Glass-FanficAllergy (ao3)  Summary: Haymitch Abernathy. In memorial. The Primrose Path-hutchabelle (ao3)  Summary: This chapter was written for d12drabbles, prompt 1--An Unexpected Letter.

[elisysd]

Gold Rush Masterlist

Sequel to Cruel Summer (Charles Leclerc x OC), can be read independently

Prologue

1.Guess my childhood is over

2.Tonight is gonna be the loneliest

3.We are invincible, we are unstoppable

4.Vultures spinning up above for what's left of me

5.They say it's bad karma being such a heartbreaker

6.If you fail to plan, you plan to fail

7.Maybe together we can get somewhere

8.I've got memories and travel like gypsies in the night

9.Personally, I think you'd be better with somebody like me

10.Way down we go

11.That's why I'm lying to my therapist

12.You could be my luck even if the sky is falling down

13.Lately you've been searching for a darker place to hide

14.I could be so sweet if only I were naive

15.Burn, crash, romance, I’ll take what I can get from you

16.And I wanna kiss you, make you feel alright

17.I’ve been thinking way too loud, I wish that I could block me out

18.And if the storm is hitting I'll try to keep you steady

19.Ask me what I earned from all those tears

20.All I know is this could either break my heat or bring it back to life

21.Sleeping's so tough you're burning up my mind

22.It's a love story baby just say yes

23.Cause space is just a word made up by someone who's araid to get too close

24.But there's a shining in the shadows

25.I'll be there till it all feels so big, till it all feels so small

26.I’ve been feeling everything from hate to love, from love to lust, from lust to truth

27.Take the moment and taste it, you’ve got no reason to be afraid.

28.You've got a friend in me

29.Why don't you let me down, I'll let you do it again

30.Can you make it feel like home if I tell you you’re mine?

31.I know heaven’s a thing, I go there when you touch me

32.Maybe there's nothing after midnight that could make you stay

33.You're scared of love, well, aren't we all?

34.Don't get too close, it's dark inside, it's where my demons hide

35.Fear or love, baby? Don't say the answer

36.And what hurts the most is people can go from people you know to people you don't

37.Should I give up or should I just keep chasing pavements?

38.What am I now? What if I'm someone I don't want around?

39.And I just wanna tell you it takes everything in me not to call you

40.You know I'm afraid of change, guess that's why we stay the same

41.How long can we be a sad son 'til we were too far gone to bring back to life?

42.If to change is what you need you can change right next to me

43.I tell myself I'm good, but I'm falling apart

44.Can you keep me close? Can you love me most?

45.Lean on me when you're not strong and I'll be your friend

46.I'll be late, but I could make it all up to you

47.I wanna be better, I wanna be new but I can’t be those things next to you

48.Knew we would crash at the speed that we were going

49.You said that you needed space, go on then, astronaut

50.I trace the evidence, make it make some sense, why the wound is still bleedin'

51. Heaven knows I should let go, it’s nothing that I don’t already know

52. Where there is a flame, someone's bound to get burned

53. You’re blowing through my mind like the hurricane

54. Did some force take you because I didn't pray?

55. Take a heart and take a hand, like an ocean takes the dirty sand

56. I know you're scared and your pain is imperfect but don't you give up on yourself

57. Lately she's been dressing for revenge

58. Hold on and hope that we'll find our way back in the end

59. I don't ask for much, gimme love

60. But I promise you this I'll always look out for you

Epilogue

BONUS CHAPTERS

Our first christmas

A trip to Bali

My place is yours 

We want you to be their godparents

Double trouble

Marry me?

A bold move

My favorite enemy

It’s not you and I anymore

Not this fucking family

[comp-lady]

[FIC] An Empire From The Ashes of Old, chapter 47 & 48

Fandom: Ghost

Pairing: Copiiia, poly ghouls, the Papas and the ghouls

Characters: Copia, Terzo, The nameless ghouls, various OCs

Notes: Copia is NOT related to Terzo in this. If you have a problem with that ship take it to someone who cares, because I don’t. Your lack of imagination is not my problem.

Summary:

The Emeritus brothers are dead, and Cardinal Copia has been installed as the new front man of Ghost.The Lights, the fans screaming and singing along, the way the tension between himself and ghouls seems to melt away. Every night it’s like he’s stepping from one world to another. One where he is a better version of himself. Confident, likeable, maybe even a little bit sexy. When on stage there is some part of Copia, buried deep and long ignored, that finally feels at home. Like he is no longer alone.But eventually the ritual ends. Final bows are done and he must leave the stage. Re-enter reality. Where nothing is simple and those in power have their own plans for the Ghost Project. To whom Copia is little more than a pawn, to be moved across the board as they see fit. He can be the puppet, or he can take the more difficult path and become the Papa he was meant to be

Read it here on AO3

If you like my work consider leaving a tip! ☕

[lovelybee666]

♥EXTRAS♥

Drawings

Catnap!

Random drawings!(Dogday, Bobby Bearhug, Ganyu, Emu Otori, Nene Kusanagi and ocs!)

Random drawings!(Goldie, Mafuemu, Emu Otori, Bobby Bearhug x Dogday + Hoppy Hopscotch, Yandere!Catnap x Reader)

Opinions

Nothing here!

GIFS

GIF Nightcord at 25

Random stuff

1. Starting to go crazy

2. Finalizing requests after hours

3. I take a nap and wake up with 100 likes

4. I forgot Bubba Bubbaphant existed

5. I accidentally deleted requests

6. being a typewriter machine

7. I need Dogday x reader content

8. WHY DID THEY NOT USE THE SMILING CRITTERS AS A GUIDE?

9. Imagine yandere Catnap

10. I need more Craftycorn requests

11. I'm not the only one who thinks Mommy takes care of the Smiling Critters like children, right?

12. Smash

13. BEST HAZBIN HOTEL SONG‼️‼️

14. Ranking yandere Smiling Critters

15. Moving forward with requests!

16. I have a theory...(I'm just delulu)

17. HOW THE FUCK DOGDAY IS SO BIG?

18. Maybe Bobby is alive

19. 100 followers!!

20. I'm starting to get TOO fond of Bobby Bearhug

21. Bobby Bearhug x Dogday

22. "I love your pfp"

23. Catnap :3(plus, Bubba)

24. I want to upload content from project sekai

25. Random screenshots I took playing pj sk

26. Fluff alphabet Craftycorn

27. Fanfic complaints i have

28. I got Rilliane

29. WTF THAT BOY??

30. I'M SO LESBIAN

31. PIN(Ñ)ERA FINALLY DIED!!

32. i'm so dumb

33. TWIN??

34. I hate my internet

35. Poppy playtime ranking

36. MIZUKI WHY

37. Yandere!Catnap picking his S/O

38. 100 publications

39. Swapverse(underverse)

40. I need fanfics of Muffet and Papyrus😭

41. They're kinda...😍

42. Y'all must see this beautiful drawing of Catnap

43. When i write for Bobby and Crafty i think of them

44. Little reminder(Xtale Papyrus)

45. I LOVE X!PAPYRUS SM

46. I WILL BE IN THE ✨BEACH✨

47. I LOVE SDRA2💗💗

48. WHY??

49. IT WAS GOING TO SOUND SO CRINGE

50. WHAT.THE.FUCK.

51. I'm about to finish 3 requests

52. Ideas(Bobby x Dogday)

53. She's called "Daddy"

Surveys

Favorite Smiling Critters(closed)

Who should I make a fluff alphabet for?(closed)

Favorite episode of Poppy Playtime (closed)

Who should do fluff alphabet after Dogday? (closed)

Poppy playtime favorite feline(closed)

Opinion about Miss Delight(closed)

Who do I continue with the fluff alphabet after Craftycorn?(closed)

What was the worst death(closed)

Favorite character from chapter two of Poppy playtime?(closed

Catnap deserved to die?(closed)

What's your opinion about the episode 3 of Poppy playtime?(closed)

Do you trust Poppy?(closed)

Should I write for Yandere Simulator?(closed)

do you prefer Dogday or Catnap?(closed)

Favorite Huggy?(closed)

Opinion about Catnap?(closed)

Opinion about Dogday?(closed)

Will you celebrate Valentine's Day?(closed)

How was your Valentines Day?(closed)

Opinion about the Prototype?(closed)

Do you trust Ollie?(closed)

PJ or Dogday?(closed)

PJ pug a pillar(closed)

[lineli225]

MHA IS / NOT / ENDING IN 2024

Ok so, MHA is definitely having at least more 50 chapters at the very minimum.

MHA is weekly, and 2024 will have only 52 weeks, so that plus breaks, if it has 50 chapters, knowing Hori takes at least a break a month, it'd need around 65 or 70 weeks to be completed.

So it can't end in 2024, maybe MHA will end around February or March 2025... Perhaps even June!

But why I think so?

The final war arc started on chapter 343, so the current arc has 66 chapters.

This final arc is the longest arc in the series, as Hori's arcs got progressively longer each new arc, the longest arcs being 24, 41 and 54, from the first big arc, it basically doubled in size, it can double again.

But i think of the traitor arc as part of the final war, starting with the Sns chapter, which is chapter 329

So to me the final arc has 80 chapters so far to put it simple.

Also Hori wouldn't just cut the end dry, I can easily see a last, short, epilogue arc showing what happened after and all the changes in society and everything.

MHA won't end in more 15 chapters, we still haven't seen: Aizawa/Mic/Kurogiri, Sero's role, the tie up to Toga and Ochako, Hawks being the light of hope, Spinner's demise, seeing what talk Compress had with the heroes, Hisashi finally appearing(hori did promise it!), Hori did mention Class 2-A briefly showing up, tie the quirk singularity theory plot, AFO finally inserting his quirk factor on Tomura, AND finally, Tomura vs Izuku.

Tomura vs Izuku is probably not being quick, giving they are the main characters, and the grand finale, the greatest mess and also what needs more focus, In these 60+ chapters of this arc so far, izuku barely showed up, you can't have a 80 chapters only arc and your MAIN CHARACTER show up just 5 or so!!!

Considering Hori made almost 50 chapters of ONLY people fighting AFO and other stuff, I'm confident we will have at MINIMUM some 15 chapters of ONLY Shigaraki vs Izuku, he is saving these two for last, so I'm confident it won't be that fast AT ALL!

Honestly, I won't be surprised if MHA have more 70 chapters left, I can easily see this arc being over 150 chapters, like, come on, Hori didn't take his sweet sweet time only to half ass rush the most important part! Hori won't rush now that he toke so much care to build up the climax

Honestly i personally think MHA might even reach 460/480 chapters total, I wont be surprised if we reach 500 chapters either! (Each volume have 12 chapters, so MHA ending with a total of 47 or 48 volumes. )

Like- there is way TOO MUCH to be seen! The final arc is only on the half way but already been 80 chapters so far! And we haven't even got to the main fight!!!

Anyways, mark my words

MHA is ending in middle 2025.

Update/Edit: Just realized MHA will have only 33 chapters released this year and only 2 volumes

First chapter of 2023 was 377- the chain thus far

33 chapters of only fighting AFO, togachako and tododabi

Even If MHA have only more 15 chaps it'll still take half a whole year 😭 MHA IS SO NOT ENDING TILL 2025

[spicywhenspeaking]

If I'm There: Chapter Eight

read from part one!

Noah and Natalie meet in high school and developed a relationship through their love of music and art. Falling in love, innocent and young, they think nothing can keep them apart. However, sometimes in the pursuit of your dreams, the things you love the most get left behind.....

Warnings: mentions of alcohol use, mentions underage drinking, absent parents

“Hey Ky, I thought you were staying with dad?” I ask hesitantly not wanting to provoke his anger that I’ve grown so accustomed to. “I wanted to finish school in person. It doenst matter, dads place sucked anyway.” His smile falls and his shoulders tense. “Oh okay, well I’m gonna go back to my room.” I shuffle out awkwardly. “Okay, later.”

Natalie: so kyle is back…said dads place sucked. Wtf! 8:45pm

Noah: WHAT?! -_- your dad didn’t even call first? 8:47

Natalie: probably called my mom, but I have talked to her in a few days. She was passed out on the couch this morning. 8:47

Natalie: looks like she had a bottle of wine for dinner…or is it considered breakfast if you have it at 6am? 8:47

Noah: yikes. I’m sorry Nat. 8:48

Noah: did he say anything else? 8:48

Natalie: no, just started acting all defensive so I dropped it. 8:49

Noah: hm..think something happened with you dad? 8:50

Natalie: with Kyle? Probably. 8:51

Natalie: I’m just going to do my best to ignore him, and maybe we move movie night to your place lol. 8:52

Noah: lol of course, and you’re obviously welcome here anytime. I’ll come and pick you up anytime just say the word. 8:52

Natalie: my hero :) <3 ily

Noah: ily :)

We text back and for the rest of the night until I pass out on my bed. 

The next day Noah picks me up in the late afternoon so we can go to one of his shows together. Nick is in the back seat when I climb in the car. Greeting them both we drive off towards the venue they’re playing at for the night. Noah’s band has really picked up traction. He's put together a four member group of guys he’s found at other gigs, Nick is playing guitar and they have another guy Julius on drums and Mikey on Bass. They’re older and I don’t talk to them much. They’ve been asked to play in more bars and even some small venues. I can’t make all of them because of work but I try to go to as many as I can. It’s new territory for me. I’ve been to a lot of his shows over the summer but they're getting bigger and the crowd is rowdy. I have to stick to the back to not get overwhelmed but I’m happy to be there supporting Noah. 

The school year starts off strong. After a few weeks I’m managing my class work and work at the coffee shop pretty well. My AP classes are challenging but not impossible. Maggie from work is in my AP Econ class and it’s nice to have someone to study with. Sometimes Noah comes to surprise me at work. He'll order a drink and flirt with me the whole time I’m making it just to see how red he can make my face; those days he will wait until I’m off so he can drive me home. We’ll make out in the car until I have toI pry myself out before it gets too late. Noah and Kyle aren’t best friends by any means. They do their best to ignore each other in school and when Noah is picking me up or dropping me off but, that doesn’t stop him from making random comments here and there. 

“You came in pretty late last night, Noah hoping you flunk out completely and follow him around forever?” Kyle snips one morning as I’m making myself a bowl of cereal before catching the bus. “Since when is it your job to keep tabs on my comings and goings?” I say back to him “you don’t ever get any shit from me when you show up wasted on a school night. You know why?” I question. “Because I’m not mom or dad and neither are you, I can look out for myself just fine. But thanks for your concern” my voice is dripping with sarcasm. “Just be careful sis, he’s clearly more concerned with his own rockstar future than yours. Don’t throw your life away for some guy.” He finishes and I can almost hear genuine care in his voice. “You’ll end up just like mom.” With that I tense, my bowl of cereal placed down with more force than necessary, sending milk and Cheerios spilling over the side. “I am nothing like her.” I grab my backpack and sling it over my shoulder. “And I never will be.” I exit the house without looking back at Kyle and slam the door, heading for the bus. 

Noah has a Thursday night show out of town and is all but begging me to go “I can’t Noah, I wish I could but I have an Econ test Friday and a science project due” I sigh, knowing I’m letting him down. “This show is huge baby. There’s going to be a lot of people there that could really help me.” He’s holding my hand’s against his chest and I can feel his rapid heartbeat. “Having you there would mean everything to me. I promise I’ll get you home right after the show, you’ll be in bed sleeping, fully rested for your test.” He says with the sweetest smile. “I need my Natalie with me” he kisses me and my defense melt “okayyy, okay, I’ll go,” I concede. 

“Yes!” He picks me up triumphantly and spins me around making us both laugh “thank you Natty” he squeezes me in a hug “ugh I love you so much” I return his hug and sigh like a love sick fool “I love you too”. 

Thursday night rolls around and while I have last period free, Noah and Nick skip their last class so they can meet Julius and Mikey to make sound check. The venue is a little over an hour away and we make it there by 4:30 just minutes before he needs to be on for sound check. The night goes on without a hitch; Noah and Nick meet a lot of people and seem to make a lot of connections but time is slipping away. Suddenly it’s 11:30pm and I cant find either of them anywhere. I’m searching the dark and smokey venue and can’t see Noah’s towering figure anywhere. Quickly becoming overwhelmed with all the drunken patrons bumping into me, I decide to go wait outside on the curb for them to finish up. I take out my phone and text Noah that I’m waiting outside so they can find me when they’re done. Finally they finish up and I notice it’s already 12:20am. The car unlocks and I take a deep breath as I climb in, exhausted from the night.

I’m used to being fast asleep on a school night by this hour, so I’m having a hard time staying awake as Noah excitedly recounts the night “Natty, that was amazing I can’t believe it, we played so well. I think that guy from Nashville is going to offer us some recording space! Isn’t that awesome?!” I can barely keep my eyes open, let alone muster the energy to respond. I let out a soft “mmhm” in reply. “I’m sorry baby, I’ll get you home soon. Just close your eyes and we’ll be there before you know it.” 

There’s a massive pileup on the way home and with the sounds of the sirens mixed with the lights shining I don’t sleep at all. When we finally make it back to my house it's nearly 3am. I just about fall out of the car before Noah is able to throw it in park. As I open my door, he goes to exit with me, exasperatedly I turn back and tell him, “Don’t worry about it. I’m going straight to bed.” If I had the energy I would have slammed the door. He exits anyway and races after me apologizing “I’m sorry Natty, I know I said it wouldn't be late.” I stop before opening the front door and look at him with exhausted eyes “I know you didnt mean too Noah. Look, I’m too tired for this.” I sigh. “I just want to go sleep for the few hours I have left before my alarm goes off.” I open the door and stand in the doorway “I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?” I say to him, sleep the only thing on my mind. “Okay, love you Natty.” he responds and leans to press a kiss to the top of my head. “Mmhm, love you” I tell him, closing the door and locking it. I head upstairs and crash onto my bed, asleep instantly.

When I wake up the next morning I turn over in bed and look at my alarm clock. “OH FUCK!” I shriek. It’s 10am.

I missed my Econ exam.

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[4uru]

My Bangladeshi queer story's first chapter. I haven't decided on a name yet. But here you go. (It has untranslated Bangla sentences)

Tagging some bangali mutuals: @rone-do-please @mylovelyme @cult-of-the-eye @heavenwontbethe-same (tell me if you want on or off the taglist)

Enjoy

Chapter 1: The snake and the mongoose 

Lalon Chowdhury thought he was straight, until he found himself with his face buried in the crook of Sunny Bose’s neck.

He was kissing the other boy like he was starving.

And maybe he was. 

“Shaala, thambi tui?” Sunny laughed. God the sound was so fucking infuriating. Lalon could feel the laugh on his lips as it vibrated through the throat he had his mouth on. He wanted to dig his nails in Sunny’s skin.

He pulled off, rested his forehead against Sunny’s and tried to catch his breath. A hand rested against his jaw.

“So, now what?” 

Asholei, now what? 

“Oi, bolbi kisu tui?” Sunny asked. Lalon couldn't answer. He didn't know how to.

***

(3 weeks earlier)

Lalon hated Sandeep Bose.

The fucker got 48 on Physics written part. Lalon got 45. he had begged Hashem Sir. But his cries fell to deaf ears. He knew he deserved 48 too. Only if Shafayet Sir checked his copy too along with Sandeep’s. He hated Sandeep, he hated Hashem Sir and he hated this godforsaken school. And wanted to burn this place to the ground. Sometimes he day-dreamed about it. He would burn this place in the dead of night. All the pain, all the frustration would turn to ash along with the flashy fake accolades. 

“Kire? Aibaro kom paili naki?” the snake asked. Sunny. Roll 3. Sandeep Fucking Bose. Lalon stretched the most looking genuine smile he could muster up at that moment. He tried to make it reach his eyes. but the blood rushing past his ears made it hard. 

“Hae re, iktu’r jonno miss.” he clenched his fists into tight balls. He wanted to fight Sunny. He was waiting for one valid trigger.

“Thak, baad deh. Chill out, you still got A+, bro." Sunny slung his arm around him and sat back on the bench.

“So what? I deserve at least 47” Lalon gritted out. He felt like a fussy toddler.

“You know this school is trash, bollam na? baad dey!” 

One more period left. Forty more minutes and he could go home, crash in his not so soft bed and melt on it faster than ice-cream under the summer sun. 

Forty more minutes.

“Sir, iktu ashte pari?” a student asked, the boy was stading by the door wearing the house leader sashe. He was from the Bangla version, Lalon couldn't remember his name.

Hashem sir gave the boy permission to come in. 

“Ami Math club er pokkho theke eshechi, amader ekti Quiz protijogita hotel jacche, agami shonibar. Amar kache form ache, ei form ta akhon niye bhorat lore nam dite paro. 

Toh tomader moddhe jara jara icchuk quiz e nam dite, 1:00 er shomoy 718 no room e chole esho. form ta joma neyoya hobe, o aro details jante parba” 

Lalon felt Sunny tense up beside him. He wondered if Sunny knew what Lalon was thinking. He would have one more opportunity to beat Sunny. Lalon struggled with maths alot. But Beating Sunny is enough motivation to carry him through it.

Lalon took the application form. And started to fill it out. 

He didn't need to win. He just needed to beat this Harami Sunny.