#this is deeply self indulgent

[umactuallycallie]

Heathcliff since I’m always thinking about him. I wanted to try out a few different lighting and shading styles with this and I think you can tell I was watching Being Human fairly recently.

[giddlygoat]

princess luigi! it’s important to me that his dress have an empire waist with the flowy off-the-shoulder sleeve thingies. i think it suits him well 💚

[cruelplatonic]

my personal headcanon is the vees were unremarkable nobodies when they were alive. i just love it as a thematic throughline for them. they love to let the public of hell speculate on them being famed and acclaimed since before death, but the the truth is they were a d-list failed influencer that got by on cheap controversey and scamming, a broke junkie who burned every shaky bridge he ever had, and a worn-out broadcast production assistant with more rejected auditions and tossed out script pitches than he could count. nobody missed them when they were gone, nobody cared who they were until they were dead.

[shih-coulda-had-it]

i can leave you two alone for a minute, right?

[knivesandsorrows]

nirvana at the paramount, 1991

[usergrantaire]

les misérables + spotify playlists [template]

[linktoo-doodles]

imposter

[hellraiserryo]

you know, the one about a bunch of kids playing a game together that ends up having apocalyptic consequences? they all have crazy, kinda geometric hair? aliens show up out of nowhere and end up being instrumental to helping the kids save the world?

[keii4ii]

스쳐가는 이들/ The Warmth of Strangers P goes to the Country of the Morning, many years after the ending.

[dronebiscuitbat]

Kiara's Introspection

(I'm sorry in advance- this might trigger some folks. *it's also me venting a 'lil*)

Kiara lays staring at the ceiling, counting the minutes and the seconds as they tick by. It's nearly 10pm, and she should definitely be going to sleep. She has school tomorrow.

Still a quiet dread builds within her, anxiety burning within her core as another minute ticks by. The two story house is quiet, she can hear the soft breeze pushing a branch against the glass of her window, the insects and the creatures of the night calling their symphony. It should have been calming…

“Our daughter is with a freak!” Crash.

She closes her eyes at that, the quiet dread blooming into a miserable kind of acceptance that spread out from her core and into her limbs and her very fingertips.

“Our daughter is happy! Why can't you see that!” Thump.

They weren't talking about her. Rarely was there an argument about Kiara herself, she was the good girl, never acting out, never talking back, never an… incorrect type of feeling. No, they were talking about;

“It's not right Delilah! It's not right! Bennita-

“Benji! You can't even call him by his name?! If Zoey knew you were speaking this way she'd-

“Not a He! I don't give a damn what she'd say! Maybe she'll finally see reason!”

They were talking about her older sister, Zoey, who had moved out to live with her boyfriend- a boyfriend that used to be a girl. Benji.

“She'll tear you a new one! That's what she'll do. And you know that too! Otherwise you'd say it to her face!” Thunk

“It's not how we were made! She should know better, Kia knows better! We raised them better!”

She flinched at that, the words swirling around her processors like a typhoon during the wet season.

I know better… I know better.

What did she know better? That Benji was a boy? That Zoey loved him?

That… that she was supposed to like boys?

She did though, she did like boys, Rad was cute and funny, his eyes were bright and full of life. He had a wonderful singing voice… he was kind.

She did- but.

The feeling of her best freinds shirt wrapped around her body suddenly felt heavy- and not in a good way. Like it was trying to suffocate her. But if she ever tried to take it off it didn't often make the feeling better, just made her feel more alone, more confused.

She liked boys.

The grew to something even more painful, her core feeling like it was squeezing hard.

Was it wrong to look at a girl in a pretty dress and see that it was pretty? That she looked pretty?

That wasn't wrong right? It was fact… objective. Someone got dolled up and looking nice and so she takes notice -wether their in a suit or a dress.

But the pain got worse instead of better, it was making it hard to breathe. The argument downstairs grew in intensity.

“And you know the Doorman girl is too! Look at her! Look at the way she dresses, the way she acts- what kind of example is that setting?!”

She was happy she didn't hear the slur that he was referring to, she had before, but this time she'd gotten lucky.

That was about Tera.

“You are not barring her from seeing her! They're family at this point! You'll break her heart!”

The pain that was coiled in her core identified themselves, they were sobs, sobs that came out harshly as they pushed past her throat and spilled out of her mouth.

“She'll ruin her! She's already bringing stuff from that damn house home!”

A bad influence, A freak, more names she wouldn't dare even think because attaching them to her best freind felt like the worst type of slander.

Tears pricked at her eyelights, couldn't they give it a rest?! There was nothing wrong with Tera, nothing. Why couldn't he see that?

She was boyish, sure. Standoffish, most definitely. But she was so strong, and brave, and… warm. So warm, and so inviting. Willing to listen, and to understand. She was one of the kindest people she had ever known.

Was that bad…?

No…

No it wasn't bad. That's how freinds should make you feel, warm and happy.

Safe.

Freinds make you feel safe.

“Listen to me bitch! She's my daughter! I can control who she sees!”

“And you don't think Uzi will question why her daughter's closest freind suddenly doesn't want to see her?! You don't think Tera won't be able to just ask her, and her not say “Daddy won't let me see you?!”

“Fuck you!”

It… it wasn't happening. She wouldn't be stopped from seeing her. Mom wouldn't let that happen… it wasn't happening. It wasn't happening.

A pathetic whimper escaped her as she trembled with more sobs. Safe. She wanted to feel safe.

Tera made her feel safe, she'd always made her feel safe. Like nothing could ever touch her as long as she was wrapped in her arms and sheltered by those leathery wings. And she'd purr, and that was so calming; like personalized white noise.

Pain creeped into her core again- that was wrong… wasn't it?

It didn't feel wrong. But her processors began to scream and her head began to hurt.

Was it wrong to like the way Tera looked in a suit? Was it wrong to say she was handsome?

Was it wrong to think about running into her arms, to be bathed in her warmth? To hold her hand?

Was it wrong to feel that way?

Tera wasn't a boy.

She liked boys

Was she wrong? Was she damaged? Because Tera wasn't a boy.

But she liked her.

She was supposed to know better… what did that mean?

Was this a choice? It didn't feel like a choice…

She… liked… boys?

[vigilskeep]

i feel like aus where rook already knew their faction companion are going to be all the rage on ao3 in a few months’ time

[meyerlansky]

😏😏😏

[zaungrrrl]

Modern slash college au fic where Caitlyn smokes Vi outttttttttt. Walk with me here I have a long informal drabble in my mind like I could probably sit down and write smth for real if I wanted to… Sorry for every error known to man in this i didn’t say it was anything serious!!!! Established relationship already but they’re still kinda new i’ll save the slow burn for another night. cw for recreational drug use (obviously)

like Caitlyn lovesssss to get high at the end of the day because it relaxes her and she sleeps better and like one night Vi is staying over after they spent too long working on their respective assignments and Vi is like. kind of restless cannot sleep and Caitlyn just isn’t that tired at that point like she’s on her phone scrolling on reels… eventually after Vi heavy sighs Caitlyn is like “Vi what’s up” and she’s kinda simple with it “I can’t sleep… too wound up from studying all day” and this is when Caitlyn has a brilliant idea

*heavy sigh* do you want to try something *pulls out a rolled joint from her bedside table*

vi: “do i want a cigarette right now?”

cait: “no it’s a joint… like weed? marijuana?”

imagine the fanciest pre-roll of weed u can imagine and triple that idea. caitlyn is rich as hell you knowwww she’s only buying top shelf stuff

vi rolls her eyes, but with no malice at all “i know what weed is. i’ve just never seen it look so fancy. just looks like a cigarette there.”

“that’s kinda intentional… not that i’ve ever gotten caught with weed but at least on first glance it’s not like… a bag of flower. plus i can’t really roll myself”

Vi laughs a little at that, trying to envision a really botched joint made by caitlyn… She knows caitlyn partook in smoking weed at parties, she preferred it to alcohol (no hangover 😄) but Vi maybe assumed it was more of a social smoking thing.

“You could always ask me… I mean I roll my own cigarettes sometimes it can’t be much different from tobacco. And jinx says buying stuff pre rolled is more expensive too.”

“Maybe I’ll take you up on that. Do you not smoke?”

“meh…” Vi scratches her head “just never really got into it i guess. made me sluggish every time i tried it, i don’t really like that feeling. Jinx is into it though.”

“oh…” Caitlyn never wants to pressure anyone, especially Vi, into doing anything. “we don’t have to smoke if you don’t want to then. it just helps me relax when i feel wound up… i guess”

“no, i’ll smoke with you. you said it helps you relax right?”

caitlyn nodded

“i feel like i could only smoke with you and actually enjoy it. just don’t let me get too high, okay?”

they move outside to caitlyn’s balcony and just sit on the ground. vi allows caitlyn to lead the way on this, acting as an observer who has been graciously let in on this private, almost meditative ritual.

caitlyn plays some music on her phone quietly and flicks on the lighter a few times, and takes a looooong drag and exhales as if she’s finally able to relax a bit

she extends the joint to vi and restates that she doesn’t have to smoke anything if she doesn’t want to. vi is like… give me the damn joint

vi is a bit more apprehensive with it, but she takes a drag and only coughs a small amount but cait freaks out

“are u okay??! do you need anything i have water or we can just stop like it’s fine we ca-“

“i’m okay!!!!! just kind of different from tobacco”

caitlyn then takes another drag and sits with the joint in her hand for a second. she is a bit nervous to suggest this, her body language closing up a little and she’s fidgeting with the hem of her sleep shirt

“there’s… an easier way… if you want less of that burning sensation in the back of ur throat…”

😏 shotgunning 😏

vi: “sure, ill try it”

cait: *long sigh* “okay, open your mouth”

vi gets kinda flirty with it LMFAO she’s like “anything for you, cupcake” (she doesn’t really know what’s going on)

cait: be serious!!!!!! open!!!!!

vi hums in response, parting her lips

cait: comes in close… Probably holding vis face… takes a looooooong drag even longer than the one before, hovers her mouth over vis and lets out a gentle exhale

vi is kind of shocked at the action, but she catches on that if caitlyn is exhaling the smoke it’s her time to inhale it… and like caitlyn had suggested, it was much smoother

cait pulls back after a second, but their foreheads are still touching. she’s feeling it a bit now. much more relaxed, a bit carefree, as if the weight of the world has been lifted off her shoulders.

“any better?” she asked

vi was actually stunned like didn’t know what to say but eventually she smiles and is like “much better.” she waits a beat, “might need you to do that again”

caitlyn laughs gently, repeating the action again

vi is also now feeling it, but she’s a bit more silly with it.

they sit in silence not feeling the need to fill the space with words, they’re fine just being in each others space

vi: “if you wanted to kiss me you could have just done it ykno” and smirks

cait is immediately stammering kind “wait no i was actually trying to help but like yeah i always wanna kiss you but like did it help like it was smoother right????? I read about it somewh-“

vi cuts her off and kisses her 😏 gently though… it’s very sweet

she smiles into it, and cait is a little caught of guard but quickly embraces it…

i can keep going muahahaha :3c

[sincerely-sofie]

*Skitters up to you on all fours and drops this in your lap, then scrambles up the walls and onto the ceiling and immediately falls asleep*

Comic time! Lucky wakes up in the middle of the night and has a chat with Sen in this one.

[msmargaretmurry]

I NEEd to hear more about depressed collage au

anon it is truly just like, peak self-indulgent hurt/comfort chatfic from the minds of me and @hopetorun. the logistics don't make sense and we don't care. the premise is that matthew suffers a horrible injury in juniors and no one thinks he'll ever be able to play again, but he plugs away at his PT for a few years and an opportunity for him to try to play CIS arises so of course he going to take it, because he cannot conceive of a life where he's not a hockey player. so he ships off to attempt to play hockey at a university in. u guessed it. the scenic city of edmonton alberta. where it turns out his rehab was not as effective as hoped; he re-injures himself only a few weeks in and it's truly and deeply career-ending this time. but he can't stand the thought of going home a failure so he stays in school as a miserable depressed shell of himself who has no idea what to do with his life, and also meets leon, who is hot and funny and has the nhl career matthew always dreamed he would have, and obviously they embark on a turbulent relationship that is maybe not always healthy but they will figure it out in the end 🙏

[badkarma1998]

He's down bad