#this is completely incoherent yet makes perfect sense to me

[vash-in-the-void]

Inspired by a post I can’t find rn but if you made a similiar post calling Meryl and Vash girlfriends just know you inspired this travesty

[buddhamethods]

10 BL Characters I Would Hit With My Car

(I don't have a licence and can't drive so this is just for fun OBVIOUSLY)

LISTEN, I love these characters. They are complex, they are human, they are flawed and yet you can't help but root for them. Or they are just giant assholes.

Regadless, I think they would all benefit from getting hit by a car as a little treat.

Feel free to tag yourselves and participate in a bit of lighthearted negativity and media complaining.

1) Ben From Never Let Me Go (2022)

Of course he would be on this list. Mainly because how are you, a closeted gay in a coming of age bl drama, sitting down in front of a piano next to a beautiful boy and not just completely eat his face in a passionate life altering kiss? I understand that was the whole point of the scene, but personally I would rise above the narrative that was trapping me.

2) Dan from Not Me (2021)

Being a cop, killing Sean's father and selling NFTs is bad enough on it's own, I agree. But Dan's biggest sin was taking the cigarette out of Yok's mouth and depriving us of seeing sad First Kanaphan smoking near a body of water-THE queer cinema experience.

As it turns out, you can be gay and homophobic at the same time.

3) Kenji from My Dear Gangster Oppa (2023)

So you have funky hair and kawnty fashion sense? Oh, you partake in fun bathtub threesomes? What, you're a little unhinged and psychotic? Perfect! THEN WHY THE HELL YOU SUCK AT BEING A VILLAIN SO HARD HUH???

Kenji you better put your helmet on, I'm turning on the engine.

4) Kanghan from Dangerous Romance (2023)

Rich people don't deserve rights in general so Kang was already on thin ice to begin with. But being a bully on top of that? UNDER THE HOOD OF THE CAR YOU GO!

Also he is so attention starved on account of his father being a negligent asshole that he will jump in front of my car willingly just to get a drop of love from dad and Sailom.

5) Yu Xi Gu from HIStory3: Make Our Days Count (2019)

(I'm so so incredibly sorry but I HAD to okay you don't underst- *gets shot immediately*)

6) Mork from Fish Upon The Sky (2021)

I looked at Pond for 0.1 second and fell so embarrasingly in love that for the entirety of FUTS I saw no flaws in Mork's character at all. All he did made sense and I was blissfuly having a great time! So I'm pummeling him to the ground for my own sake I CAN'T KEEP BEING THIS STUPID ABOUT HIM HE IS OBJECTIVELY CREEPY!

7) Vee from Love Mechanics (2022)

Was he in my "I want them carnally" list? Yes. Do I find him beautiful and incredible? Double yes. Am I smearing him on asphalt like a squished bug for causing Mark so much unnecessary pain and heartbreak? More likely than you think.

8) Jiwoo from To My Star/ To My Star 2 (2021-22)

MY BEAUTIFUL BOY!! A crumb of healthy communication is all I'm asking for!

Jiwoo was so emotionally bricked up for the majority of both seasons that it caused ME damage. So me hitting him with my car is both a revenge plot and an attempt to let loose some of those pent up feelings of his.

(But also I'm dead meat if Seojoon finds out it was me behind the wheel. He loves that boy too much.)

9) Zee from Twins (2023-24)

I'm volunteering to do this as public service to keep Sprite and First together without any twins switch drama. One gremlin down, one successful volleyball couple UP!!

10) Winner from Pit Babe (2023-24)

I want to do it as an experiment. I feel like he would make a funny sound under the wheels, like when you sqeeze clown's nose or step on a rubber duck. I would also like to see how this will affect his character. Will he become even more annoying? Will it fix him completely? ONLY ONE WAY TO FIND OUT!!

(This was so fun I love inflicting imaginary violence on fictional men. If you read this far into this incoherent insanity, consider yourself tagged!💖)

[zcinderone]

Some ideas and criticism about case2

spoiler

I realized why people were so split and clueless right till the end. It’s because the murder itself was too simple, not too mysterious. You literally need only two existing facts to figure out whodunit a year ago: Only Teruko, Ace and Eden had access to the tape. Eden had alibi for the fish. Nothing in the resuming trial even helped further uncover or hide these two clues. Recalling the band is a bonus point as a physical proof for boss fight but not needed to know it has to be you! In classic DR cases you have to go through layers and layers of the murder mystery itself and when things are peeled and exhausted well enough, the candidate close to the last layer is most definitely the one. Yet this case is so unique: they only dabbled on the murder method a bit and quickly locked hard on two targets, effectively creating a delusion in your subconsciousness to expect some extra layers to unravel the secret when it really was the first and last one. But the case itself was so compelling because they went through such fantastical trivial things to construct solid conflicts and personal stories(which is arguably the best part in my opinoin about DR formula ) and consumed so much time. Had they switched order by chance and discussed the method first, it would literally be game over from the get-go.

Still, there are things I really feel that did damage to (further pefecting )the story.

1,Ace was in fact quite clever to figure out and pull such convoluted plan but locked this in a very narrow scope including himself. Their reasoning is well Ace choke her unconscious so people would lock some stronger dudes dismissing ladies I guess so he needed to imitate Nico which makes 0 sense and actually double locks him as that one would be strong enough and have been at the previous crime scene. And the explanation for all that is, quote Charles “ace is nothing if not unintelligent so he thought it would work” so simple and so incoherent.

 2, Water with fish, complete plot device, to help clear Eden and lock Ace, despite he can get water anywhere and more safely.

 3, Scuff on the floor, never mentioned again, you could guess it is from the struggle and it can make sense but it felt so off not even mentioning it in the closing argument.

4. Arei just didn’t wear her glove that morning. This one knocked me out hard.

There are still some things I don't find convincing but I somehow can forced myself to believe they could work and don't affect a great murder case. But these four I'm not so sure.

So far, I feel story-wise drdt still probably is the best I've seen but I genuinely feel this chapter didn't deliver a murder mystery(by itself not the whole trial) nearly on par. It's such a pity that there is some great chance already in its narrative that can make perfect sense out of a 3rd party twist(imagine how this would be received when everyone was fretting between Ace and Eden ). Every best wish to this masterpiece in the future, especially hope it can genuinely outsmart me, not in a "you believe I am way smarter but no I fooled you!" kind of trick-smart me way.

[beelanddiavolosimp-blog]

Hi! I love your writing♡ Can i request the brothers with an mc who has Haphephobia (fear of being touched, usually they can only touch people they trust after a long period of therapy) and their reactions to the first time mc tries to hold their hand?

Hello! ^^ thank you so much I'm so glad you enjoy my content :) I have never heard of this phobia but I will try my best to write as close as possible to its definition!

How the obey me brothers would react to a Haphephobia MC holding their hand

Lucifer

He listened attentively when you explained your phobia to him and completely understood. He thought to himself and decided a big way for your relationship to become stronger without touch is quality time. You often found yourselves on small coffee or tea dates or just something small where the two of you could relax. On one of those particular dates you found yourselves gazing at his hand. That sense of fear you once had at the beginning of your relationship wasn't quite there anymore. You decided to test the waters and sneak your hand to hold his. He stalled a bit realizing you broke that barrier you once told him would eventually come. He then turns and smiles at you "Good job Mc I am proud of you" he says softly.

Mammon

Now he at first was confused. Why wouldn't you like being touched by the one you love? He then realized that not everyone is the same as he is. Since he cared deeply about you he asked his brothers of different ways to show his love to you without making you uncomfortable. He eventually settled on the same as Lucifer quality time but it was more fun dates such as festivals or the zoo just an activity you two would enjoy. On one particular date you listen to him talk away about something before glancing down at his hand. You ponder for a bit before deciding it was time to do what you both were building at. You reach your hand out then gently wrap your fingers around his own. He immediately stiffened and his words became jumbled and incoherent. After a bit of time calming him down he gazed lovingly at you and said "thank you".

Levi

He himself was terrified of any romantic interaction with you so he wasn't as taken aback as the others were. You two found yourselves easily able to adapt to each other. You two mostly spent time in his room watching anime or playing games together. It was actually a long bit into your relationship and he never once faltered or made you uncomfortable fitting into your phobia perfectly for you. You look at his fingers and decide for you both something smaller would be suitable. You suddenly interlock your pinkies together and look up at him. He immediately flushed red and was another one who was incoherent. After he calmed down he first asked if you were truly okay with the action and you smile at him. "I feel comfortable with you Levi" you say truthfully and he smiles back.

Satan

He was very smart only ever reading books and gaining knowledge but when it came to you he felt so lost. Once he learned of your phobia he had no issues with it per say just wondering how he could make you comfortable. He decided on showing you things that helped keep him calm which included cats and books. It was a quiet chilly evening when the both of you were looking at cats together that you felt you two hit that peak comfortability to where you aren't afraid anymore. You gently interlock your fingers together and he had a small red hue to his cheeks yet he talked as if everything were normal not wanting to freak you out but on the inside he was as happy as he could ever be.

Asmos

He was so afraid to say the least. All he knew was being touchy and loving all over the person he was attracted to. He focused hard though to make sure you were fully comfortable with him because he loved you like he did no other. He decided gift giving was perfect. It showed he listened to you and your interest ontop of putting severe thoughts into the gifts. You two were gossiping in his room where he kept his distance perfectly comfortable for you. Yet you felt as if you'd be okay with even a slight touch so you reach your hand over to his and set it ontop of his own. He stopped talking and looked down at your hand before looking back up at you. "Are you sure this is okay Hun?" He asked genuinely. Once you nod he gently held your hand and wouldn't admit it but was practically vibrating with happiness that he came so far with you.

Beel

After you told him he was such a sweetheart that even when he came too close to you he immediately apologized or asked if you were okay. It wasn't an annoying amount just showing he genuinely cared for you and your comfortability above all else. He didn't mind not touching you he just enjoyed your presence just as he did belphie. He took you out to dinner at a really nice restaurant and he was speaking of all of the great food here that you should try. Yet your mind wandered to his hands. They were big yet warm and comforting. You perk up realizing you weren't afraid of the thought of holding his hand like you were before. You set your hand into the palm of his own and he immediately looked at the action. He then looked up at you and gave one of his heartwarming smiles. He made no action to move away or go further going with the pace you set.

Belphie

He is barely conscious most of the time so he didn't think he would have an issue with your phobia that is until it came to wanting to sleep together. He then realized he had to keep to himself and not cuddle up to you for your comfort. He protected you a lot from others who tried to become overly touchy since well he becomes a dick when it comes to protecting you. He found himself being fine with just sleeping next to you where no touch was needed. Yet when you two were out stargazing together you knew in your heart and mind that now was the time. You gently hold his hand and he immediately turns his head to you. His eyes asked you if you were truly okay and ready. When you nod he just gives your hand a gentle squeeze and looks back up to the stars wishing today could last forever now.

I hope I did well and that you enjoy it!

[foli-vora]

Dave + toys = please 🤲🏻🤲🏻

I see you, you dirty bitch. ily. I marinated, procrastinated, and now am ready to share a bit of filth. It’s small, but my feral panting is fogging up my screen so yeah. yolo.

warning: restraints (i have an obsession with his work ties and idc), toy use, p in v, double penetration, the animalistic urge to have this man do whatever he fucking pleases. 18+ 😌

-

"Shh," he soothes quietly, eyes dark and locked onto where he kneels between your thighs, "open up for me. Come on, you can do it."

Can you? It doesn’t feel like you can. You’re drowning in it all, overwhelmed by every touch, every move, every word. One second, you’re pulling away, intimidated by the pressure and stretch, the next, you’re pushing for more, thighs fighting to open just that little bit wider, to take just that little bit more. It’s a lot. You can feel the tension lingering and tightening each and every muscle. There’s pain, but it’s not enough for you to call it quits with that one simple word.

No, there’s curiosity there, keeping you spread and at his complete and utter mercy. There’s a want to impress, a need to satisfy the dark interests lurking somewhere deep within you that somehow only he knows how to find. The struggle seems to gain the upper hand, and your brows pinch together as another breath is sucked in between open lips.

"I-it's too much, Dave, fuck - I can't -"

Your hands twist and tug at the familiar work ties knotted neatly around your wrists, but to no avail. They hold firm.

"Yes, you can."

His thumb finds your overstimulated clit, surprisingly soft after the assault of earlier, circling round and round with just the right amount of pressure until you start to rock into the rhythm. He waits another beat, letting you relish in the warm, blissful slow build before pushing forward another inch, and then half more.

The vibrator isn’t the largest in your collection by any means, but with Dave’s thick length pushing into your cunt right below where it already fills you to the glossy silicone hilt, it feels monstrous. The pressure… it’s too much, it’s not enough, it’s fucking divine. It’s torture, and yet it has you falling into an incoherent stream of phrases you aren’t even sure make sense. He takes another break, thumb still methodical in its movements until you feel the muscles in your thighs jump in anticipation.

“Good?”

Words are no use in the moment, all you can do is nod and hope he sees the blatant desperation pinching your face. He does. Of course he does. With you, he sees it all.

“Almost there,” he murmurs, “you’re taking it so well.”

He moves again, and this time he doesn’t stop. You’re not even sure what kind of noise you make when he’s finally balls deep in your cunt, fit tight and snug right with the length of the vibrator.

It takes a moment to get used to, but with the rough pad of his thumb pressing and rolling over your clit in that perfect mix of downright maddening and intoxicating, the tension filling your body starts to dissipate. You want him to take you over that edge one more time, you want him to move, you want him to do something.

“N-now what?” You pant, eyes fluttering to see him through the haze of pleasure filled tears.

He smiles before he tongue rolls over his bottom lip, and you follow the slick glisten it leaves with an urge to kiss it away.

“Now we see how far you can go.”

[grunkulous]

some lazy gideon sketches. He’s so hard to draw btw, if you haven’t tried drawing him for yourself yet give it a go and come feel the pain with me.

WARNING: incoherent analysis rant below, proceed at your own risk!!!

I’ve been struggling with drawing him for a while now, especially his hair and face, and I’ve been thinking about how his design has probably changed the most out of everyone. His appearance has always been incredibly inconsistent, and while it used to irk me (mostly because it makes it hard to find reliable drawing references) I’ve come to have an appreciation for every variation, and I’m starting to realize why they exist at all.

I don’t think there will ever be a completed or finalized version of gideon’s design, and it has to do with his oddly contradictory and complex personality/character.

On one hand, he’s a manipulative, cunning, vengeful, smooth-talking maniac. He owns an incredibly successful media company, of all things, and is a total dick to almost everyone around him, showing little care for his allies. Yet he’s also a romantic obsessive who can’t handle a rejection and goes through the effort of forming an entire league to control ramona’s love life despite not really seeming to even know why he bothers at this point.

But at the same time… he’s also a huge nerd and a hopeless loser who watches anime and binges junk food in his spare time, who ends up yielding to the first woman more assertive than he is. He’s kind of ridiculous, to put it simply, and every iteration has its own interpretation of the character.

It’s very difficult to capture all sides of his character in one, singular design because truthfully, gideon is one of the more complex characters in the series, having such an odd array of characterics that somehow just work, yet are nearly impossible to display all at once.

I think the best design so far is still the comic book version, which has a good overall balance between nerdy, business and crazed lunatic, but I think every design so far has its own strengths to boast, none of them really feeling… complete? if that makes sense? There’s something to like in every version, yet none have contained his full character. There is no perfect look for him. My own version that i’ve drawn feels a little too… soft for my liking. I don’t know how to visually communicate everything at once. You can only get the full picture by looking at every iteration.

in conclusion, character design is fucking hard. I have a great respect for anyone who has to make characters for a living.

[kafkaoftherubble]

Lyn hi thoughts? Sorry in advance if this is incoherent, more sick than usual. Shout 9ut to auto correct by making this 70% more readable by catching a lot of my typos and spelling errors.

Ira is from the north. The north was, invaded so he joins the military to fight the invaders. This fight continues for several years, even after Ira becomes a minister. It's the only thing that matters to Ira, he just wants his home to be safe.

During the story, Volker dismisses the military and has them stop defending the north and gives that land to the invaders.

From age 15-30, this is what Ira feared most. He didn't want his home to be removed from Odeda, but ot happened anyway because Volker didn't wanna bother continue the fight.

Even when iy dores happen though, Ira doesn't mind because Volker has so masterfully manipulated him, making him believe strange things he would never even consider before.

Does this make sense with the story or should I change it? It happens like one quarter in, should it be later so the reader can better understand how much Ira loves his home and how much Volker lied to him?

Sorry for the tardiness! I hope you're feeling way better now, man.

I think this sequence of events works!

This sells his conflict hard. Better still, it is entirely believable that Edith's imprisonment + Ira's oldest intent for his part of the land is what motivated him to go against Volker after being very loyal to the latter.

It's psychologically possible that Ira's earliest intent, while dear to him, has become steadily co-opted into Ira's latter-day loyalty to Volker that he can, and does, sideline it for a bit. Hence, he will need one more psychological break to make him finally turn his back on Volker. Sorta like the perfect excuse for him to renew his commitment. Then, even after Edith was free, Ira would not stop there—because now he's remembering the one cause he has always place close to his heart again.

---

Even when it did happen though, Ira doesn't mind because Volker has so masterfully manipulated him, making him believe strange things he would never even consider before.

Aha! This is a case of intense undue influence! Some may call it brainwashing. As luck would have it, I had just listened to a neat, 37 minutes long science podcast about brainwashing:

I'm gonna make some notes on it when I have the time (unfortunately, it means "not now". Because I haven't gotten the time yet!), and I wouldn't mind sharing with you the notes when I'm done, if you don't wanna listen to it or if podcasts aren't your thing.

BUT! It really is just 37 minutes long, and I think it can give you some general idea of how this manipulation could be written in the story. This episode centers around cults—why do they act in a way they would have never after they joined it? And the cult here didn't necessarily mean religious or spiritual flavor. One of the speakers was actually an ex-member of a political/ideological cult. That's some proximity to the Volker-Ira situation, yea?

Lemme know if you need my notes version if you don't feel like listening! I'm gonna make notes either way and helping out a friend will give me a bit more urgency to complete it sooner (the other urgency comes from the worry that my memory may fade due to so many things I have to give a damn about. What if these specific memory cells have been remodified for something else before I can record them?! Hahahaha!).

[dreamcrow]

catfight? :3c

(from this wip meme; thank you for the ask!)

so like. toa. does not do a great job of explaining what familiars actually are, right. are they the human children attached to changelings? (which is...another post.) or are they magical animal mascots like archie? (why is the same word used for such wildly different concepts…? but. again. different post.) this story is about exploring the latter sense, namely: what the fuck are they? what does a familiar do? why do some wizards (for which intend "general magic-user") have them and others don't? are they like daemons? how connected are you? is it permanent, or are some familiars temporary? do all magic-users have familiars, or is the relationship culturally specific? does being a familiar grant some level of intelligence, or is there some poor bastard out there with like. ye standard-issue flatworm of +100 magic?

...you can see why this isn't published yet. orz

anyway, this fic was born out of me trying desperately to make incoherent canon make sense. and also to do something with my thoughts about bellroc and skrael's familiars (who otherwise show up almost never!). also also to give archie some kind of personality. basically, the concept for this fic is:

after [the end of however i decide to fix the ending of wizards]. archie is prowling around in the woods of arcadia. as u do.

he finds something much nastier than he expected (skrael, being a wangsty little shit).

much as i don't know what i think about familiars, i do know i've decided that something about the nature of the relationship means powerful magic-users are simply more predisposed to such relationships.

archie realizes, with abrupt and terrible clarity, exactly what the order's skulls are.

and when fight-or-flight hits: twelve entire pounds of perfect blazing dragon wrath picks fight.

now my skrael's not a complete jackass so he doesn't actually throw down with a cat. but. what i want to do with this fic is 1.) work on a character i've never developed before, and 2.) let them be completely, catastrophically right. >:)

[millionth-attempt]

"Always your sword, my umbral sovereign; in life, in death, in anything beyond life or death that they want to throw at thee and me. I died knowing you’d hate me for dying; but Nonagesimus, you hating me always meant more than anyone else in this hot and stupid universe loving me. At least I’d had your full attention."

So xd

SO.... How do I even start? How can I begin to comprehend, and even more so, find the words that capture my thoughts (insane) and my feelings (ahdkshfakdham) about this damn book? What, and please bare with me and the madness, WHAT ON EARTH IS THIS BOOK?

How is it possible that we have it, how is it possible that someone out there has a brain that is able to build... well, this.

When I first read Gideon the Ninth, all I had was disconnected (yet overwhelming) impressions floating around in my brain (like constantly, like I couldn't stop going back to them, in form of fanart and fanfics, because yes, I was a huge ass coward and I didn't dare -didn't want- to read Harrow the Ninth. Like her, I could not grasp, I could not stand hearing about a world without Gideon, much less like it). I was told by random tumblr users to have faith, that Harrow the Ninth was worth it and nothing I could ever imagine. I didn't want to trust them, I was so scared of being disappointed (heartbroken). I started the stupid book, though. I started because I wanted to know but also because I don't respect my feelings, not even a little bit. And then my chaotic impressions of Gideon the Ninth turned into madness after a second PERSON SINGULAR NARRATION, BITCH.

But then nothing happened.

So I went insane. I didn't understand. I couldn't process what was going on.

So I read fanfics with the constant fear of coming across spoilers. And then I actually spoiled myself on tumblr with some random post with a quote I now don't remember, but a quote that clearly implied Gideon was coming back.

So I did the only logical thing I could. Knowing I was stuck with Harrow the Ninth and yet still obsessed with them, I re-read Gideon the Ninth. And I finally understood. My incoherent thoughts about Gideon the Ninth had been completely accurate and I re-lived them all, but now I also had a complete picture of what was going on. Not just Gideon and Harrow, not just some random characters and names, not just a vague notion of what had happened, not just the heartbreak. I understood in a way that wasn't just emotional, that wasn't just falling in love and being wrecked by what happened. I also understood the succession of events, I understood how brilliant the plot was, the implications of such a crazy-ass necromantic-fantasy world. I had missed so much being too distracted by Gideon's brilliant mind and Harrow's earnest heart. (I had missed so much by being horny and desperate for them.)

And with a bit of a more rational understanding, I felt I was more cognitively prepared to face Harrow the Ninth again. And shit, I was. But it's wrecked me again.

Harrow the Ninth is the kind of book that feels right on every level, the kind of book that is so carefully and conscientiously built that it reached the status of ultimate perfection. The status of being destined to exist, of wouldn't make sense if it was different. Harrow the Ninth provides with an understanding and a development of who Harrow is that blows my mind and will continue to blow my mind until I'm dead. BUT, and let me state this very slowly and clearly, it does the same thing for Gideon. Gideon the Ninth compared to this book is such an introduction. I never imagined I could like Harrow the Ninth better, I never imagined that there could be a book that made me love Gideon more than Gideon the Ninth. I was so utterly and profoundly wrong I'm embarrased. Because how could I miss that as much as I love Gideon, no one, not a soul, can love Gideon more than Harrow. And this fucking book is just that. Harrow loving and grieving for Gideon to levels that I can't explain, that literally make my neurons snap and go crazy with obsession, with nausea, with the suicidal need to be swallowed by this book like the stoma swallowed Augustine xd

I know I will burn everything and then myself if they don't have a happy ending and I will continue to be wrecked by this insanity with the upmost delight. GIVE THEM A HAPPY ENDING, TASMYN, I BEG YOU ON MY KNEES

BUT CAN SOMEONE PLEASE, PLEASE EXPLAIN TO ME WHO THE HELL IS NONA THE NINTH (not if it's a spoiler, only if I'm dumb and I missed the explanation)

[radiation]

what are your thoughts on the silver case? (and FSR or 25th ward if you've also played those)

I have yet to play the other two but I’m gonna get around to it these days, but I fuckin love the silver case, visually just on another level especially as far as VNs go. The writing has a lotttt of flaws and I found it was very really back and forth between making perfect sense and being completely incoherent but something about that fact is just so captivating to me that in the end I wouldn’t really change anything about it. Which is a super unusual way for me to feel about any kind of narrative, usually when there’s issues with pacing or clarity I get annoyed but I was totally along for the ride, even in ridiculously long meaningless hallway-traversing segments. Like, if it can make me like that, it’s gotta be something really specially yknow

And I also do wanna make it clear that there is a lot of really good writing in it, I love the characters and the dialogue is a blast, lots of really cool plot lines, everything involving the internet is so fuckin well done. And in the end it managed to be one of the most long term emotionally impactful games I’ve played. We have got to the past fr. But all in all it’s a super impressive piece of art, super weird in the best way and the world needs more stuff like it

[dwagom]

Behind every crypto billionaire are tens of thousands of innocent victims whom we have failed to reach and whom our democratic institutions have forgotten. As is the theme in all my crypto analyses, we can learn the most about mania’s future from the past’s popular delusions. From Walter Bagehot’s description of the London financial manias of 1825:

All people are most credulous when they are most happy; and when much money has just been made, when some people are really making it, when most people think they are making it, there is a happy opportunity for ingenious mendacity. Almost everything will be believed for a little while, and long before discovery the worst and most adroit deceivers are geographically or legally beyond the reach of punishment. But the harm they have done diffuses harm, for it weakens credit still farther.

The crypto bubble is marked by the same wild spectacle of wilful credulity, intellectual indolence, and subversive opportunism in an era where the vapidest of technological fantasies have been elevated to cult-like status as a pacifier for the existential angst of our age. The impetus behind all crypto and web3 discourse is simply the sound and fury of post hoc myth-making to rationalize away the collective incoherence of this absurd bubble in a near-perfect exemplar of the motivated reasoning of economic determinism.

And yet, the FTX meltdown is nothing new in the history of financial manias, FTX was a Bahamanian shadow bank, and its collapse bears all the hallmarks of classic historical bank runs. (...)

The entire FTX operation screamed scam to anyone who could do even the most basic due diligence on the operation. Did anyone ever ask why hordes of mum-and-pop retail investors were wiring money to a shady entity called ‘West Realm Shires Services Ltd’ just so that they could become an unsecured creditor to a Bahamanian shell company to purchase derivatives of completely abstract financial assets whose only demand is driven by popular sentiment about a meme of a talking dog? Nothing in any crypto narratives makes a single ounce of sense to anyone willing to scratch the surface of the received narrative and apply even the slightest iota of intellectual analysis. And yet the suckers linked up hook, line, and sinker to buy what SBF was selling. As Charles Dickens remarked in 1885, they will inevitably swarm to the next techno-solutionist grift that promises wealth or liberation.

The next man who has as large a capacity and as genuine a taste for swindling, will succeed as well. Pardon me, but I think you really have no idea how the human bees will swarm to the beating of any old tin kettle; in that fact lies the complete manual of governing them. When they can be got to believe that the kettle is made of the precious metals, in that fact lies the whole power of men like our late departed.

[finniestoncrane]

Hello 😊😊

can i request arkham origins eddie x fem! reader they met at the GCPD and she was always stalking him until one day he got tired and asked what's wrong with her?

Fluffy pls ☺️💚

That's Not Funny

Arkham!Riddler x Female!Reader, word count: 700 for you, more fluff that i think i've ever put into something before that involved this man u-u 💚 request info • prompt list • send me a request • kofi minors DNI!! 🔞 cw for nsfw stuff: it's p/much sfw but there's a kiss and maybe a lil bit of leering at eddie because he's so pretty

It was really difficult not to let your mind wander when Edward was around. From the moment you had met him, he had intrigued you. Everyone else had been so kind and welcoming on your first day on the job at the GCPD, clerical work was the backbone of any working operation and they all knew it. Except for Edward Nigma, who had pushed past you to get back to his work, only muttering something incoherent when he was told you were new. Someone else had done his introductions for him, but you were barely listening past his name, watching him move somehow awkwardly yet confidently through the bullpen.

An innocent crush had only grown over the course of your first month there, not made any less intense by your efforts to ‘bump into’ him at every opportunity. It was easy enough to know his comings and goings, given that you had access to his schedule, his workload, and also his personal files. Home address, telephone number, no next of kin…Perfect.

It was frustrating though, as he was well aware of your existence and yet, had never made any effort to speak to you. There had been several occasions where you had been caught leering at him, and he’d never even so much as looked directly at you. That time you just happened to be walking past the locked room when he had come out of the showers, wrapped in a towel, chest hair matted to his chest, soaking wet, your mouth literally agape at the sight of him. Or when you spent your entire lunch break watching him, unblinking, tinkering with someone’s computer in the bullpen, his eyes meeting yours a few times, aware that you were staring right back at him each time he happened to look over. Even to have him confront you would have been something. But he said nothing.

Which is why you felt so confident in your blatant admiration of him as you stared at the back of his head in the break room, watching him chug two cups of coffee.

“What’s wrong with you?”

His words had you jumping a little, excited to hear him speak finally, but completely terrified.

“I…uh, what?”

“What’s your problem?” He turned to face you, questioning you with narrowed eyes, his arms folded across his chest. It was useless to expect you to answer, you were too busy wondering how a sweater vest could ever be that attractive.

“Hello?”

“I’m so sorry.”

“I knew it.” He scoffed as he recognised confusion on your face. “Don’t try to pretend now. They really have you playing the long-con, hm? Easily manipulated? I think it’s pathetic that you were so easily pulled into their idiotic little pranks.”

“What do you…”

“Save it, you think I’m too dumb to know what’s going on? I’m the smartest person here, and you think I wouldn’t realise you were all teasing me? I can admit, the organisation that goes into something like this, the collaborative effort is admirable. How did they manage to get you on board so easily? Hazing?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“This! The whole thing! You…getting you to pretend to be obsessed with me so I embarrass myself and ask you out. So that you can all laugh at Edward, because he needs to be knocked down a peg. Can’t take it that I’m smarter and more capable than you all!?”

You sat silently, watching his frantic little gestures, arms flailing wildly as he ranted.

“Because a pretty girl couldn’t possibly be interested in Edward. No! He’s just the loser who ‘does the computers’ which doesn’t even make grammatical sense!”

The heat in your cheeks was embarrassingly strong. He called you pretty. The rest of the words were slowly sinking in, but you were far too focused on the idea that the object of your obsessive desires thought you were pretty.

“Well? Are you going to defend yourself? Just know that I can tell when people are lying. I’m incredibly perceptive.” He gestured his hand out, presenting the palm to you, giving you the stage.

“There’s no…I’m…I just…I think you’re interesting.”

“Oh.” Edward stood awkwardly by the counter, shuffling towards you slowly and thrusting out his hand. “In that case, Edward Nigma, nice to meet you.”

[z-ancunin]

Dating Bucky Barnes Headcanons Part 2- (NSFW)❤️

| Bucky Barnes x fem!reader | Warnings: some light swearing, SMUT- Praise/degradation, light choking, teasing, Daddy kink, orgasm denial, overstimulation | Part 1 in case you missed it |

Now. We already know that Bucky is an A+ boyfriend. But inquiring minds want to know, how does he perform in the bedroom?

Well.

Let me tell you.

You're in for a treat.

Bucky may not have been intimate with anyone in a while, but that doesn't mean he's lost his touch.

Hell no.

He already has incredible stamina, but the super-soldier serum multiplied it by 100.

Bucky can go for hours just teasing you.

Depending on what mood he's in, he'll either make you cum multiple times or deny you your release until you're begging him for it.

"I don't know Princess, have you earned it yet?" he murmured in your ear.

"Y-yes Daddy!" you cried out.

"I didn't hear you say please." Bucky completely stilled his movements, making you whine incoherently.

"Use your big girl words." he scolded.

"Please Daddy, please let me cum. I've been such a good girl!" you practically screamed.

"Hmmm, okay. I guess I'll let you. Hang on tight Princess," he said as you gripped his shoulders. "I'm gonna make you see stars."

On the days where he is feeling nicer, he’ll make you cum over and over again, turning your legs to jelly.

He knows where your sweet spots are, and he can hit them almost effortlessly with his fingers, tongue, or dick.

Bucky has a few rules in the bedroom that you need to follow.

Address him as Daddy or Sir.

Use your manners (please and thank you) and your 'big girl words' when you wanted something.

And always, tell him right away when something was wrong or didn't feel good.

"What's your safeword Princess?"

"Honeycomb, Daddy." you said proudly as Bucky pressed a kiss to your forehead.

"Good girl. Now let's begin."

It was a sight to behold when you were on your knees with Bucky’s cock in your mouth, slurping and bobbing your head.

Fucking hell. He could cum just from watching you, let alone the tantalizing sensation of your tongue on his dick.

He’ll never push your head down, instead, he’ll pet your hair and give you endless praise.

“That’s it, you’re doing so good. Makin’ me feel so fucking good doll.”

While you were sucking him off, he would use his metal hand to play with your sensitive nipples.

But y’know what he loves more than watching you give him head? Burying his face in between your gorgeous thighs.

Hell, he’d stay there all day if he could.

You always taste delicious to him, like peach jam.

He likes calling you Peaches for that reason too.

With his heightened senses, he can actually smell your arousal. It calls to him, drives him crazy.

Once he got a taste of your sweet juices, he found it very hard to stop.

Bucky eats you out like a starved man.

Not only do you taste and smell delicious, but your moans are music to his ears.

All he can think about is how he wants more.

This man eats pussy for his pleasure and yours.

He knows when to suck, how to flick, and where to lick you.

And when he adds in his fingers?

Forget it.

Your back is arching off the bed and your voice goes hoarse.

“Let me hear you doll, don’t hold back. I want to hear every noise you make.”

He curls them into that amazing spot and sends you over the edge.

Bucky’s body may be chiseled by the gods, but his dick was shaped by the Devil.

Perfect length. Long enough to make it feel like he was in your stomach, but not to cause any pain or discomfort.

Thick from shaft to head.

His balls are big enough to smack into your pussy whenever he’s thrusting into you.

Bucky normally sets an even pace, with a swirl of his hip here and there to catch you off guard.

When you and Bucky had your first time, he was incredibly gentle and tender.

But once he knows that you can take him, he won’t be afraid to use you as he pleases.

He loves having you on your back with one leg over his shoulder so he can get a deep angle and watch you come undone.

He’ll switch from holding up your leg to grabbing onto your hips and moving you up and down while still thrusting into you.

He also enjoys doggy style, especially when he’s having his way with you.

“What’s got you so worked up Princess?” he teased you. “You’re such a slut for my cock aren’t you? M’ gonna fuck you so hard, you’ll still feel me inside you for days.”

Bucky loves pulling on your hair, whether it’s short or long.

He’ll do anything you ask of him, as long as it doesn’t cause you harm.

So when you asked him about the idea of choking you, he immediately refused.

Not only could he seriously hurt you, but he’d also already done that when Zemo triggered the Winter Soldier.

You patiently and carefully explained the proper way to choke someone without hurting them, he slowly started to come around to the idea.

Once he knew that he wasn’t hurting you and that you liked his metal hand around your throat, he found that he enjoyed it too.

Bucky is very big on aftercare.

He’ll run you a hot bath or shower after a long session, and wash your hair and body for you.

Or he’ll massage your entire body with lotion or essential oil and rub away any stiffness.

He’ll praise you endlessly as he’s taking care of you.

“Such a good girl, you did so well for me.” Bucky slowly kissed you. “Daddy’s very proud.”

[9tzuyu]

exquisite (rewrite)

[old version]

summary: uhhh idk artist!reader gets f*cked by nat

warnings: 18+, smut, choking (verrrrryyy briefly), mommy kink

also its been awhile since i’ve written smut so if this is awful do not perceive me >:(.

thank you moli for proofreading, i love u <3

dt: @nermalina hey bff heres that smut i promised you. consider it a very late birthday gift <3

🏷: @natasha-danvers @kermy48 @yelenabelovasgf @blackxwidowsxwife @slut-for-nat

natasha had been a model for dozens of people, dozens of times. it never crossed your mind that she would model specifically for you. the redhead was aggressively known for rejecting people's pleas for her to let them paint, sketch, or mold her from clay.

so it came as a surprise when you came across an email requesting a one-on-one session with you. had natasha's name not caught your eye, you would've deleted the email and completely missed such a huge opportunity.

you just didn’t expect it to happen so quickly.

the all too known model would be at your apartment in half an hour. you had already set up your supplies the night before out of pure nervousness of her arrival.

you stood in the middle of your kitchen, a cup of orange juice in hand as you thought about the different styles you could draw her in. however, your train of thought was unexpectedly interrupted by the sound of a knock at your door.

natasha was twenty minutes early. and god did it feed into your anxiety.

after unlocking the deadbolt, you were greeted with a friendly pair of green eyes. you didn't say anything, only moving out of the way so she could walk in.

she took in her surroundings, and you suddenly felt a little embarrassed about your apartment. it was cheap, invaluable compared to the rich houses you knew natasha had been invited to.

"sorry it's not much," you mumbled.

"no, it's fine. it's different... in a good way i mean." she reassured quickly, "it doesn't scream how much you want to impress me."

you gave an awkward nod and led her into the living room, motioning to her that you wanted her on the couch.

"okay, you can get into any form you want as long as-" seeing natasha with her clothes half off and still going caught your breath. "-you're comfortable."

she saw your panic from the corner of her eye and smirked. natasha tended to have that effect on people, but this was the first time she allowed someone to draw her fully nude. seeing the look in your eyes as they roamed her body gave her the confidence boost she needed.

you bit your lip as you watched natasha position herself. her right arm rest against the armrest, legs situated atop each other while her left arm fell against her hip.

and just when you thought she had finalized her position, she bent her left knee up and spread her legs. you had to bite your tongue to keep yourself from moaning out loud.

"how's this?"

you nodded, "perfect."

normally natasha could keep herself busy with small talk, but you seemed to be much more quiet than the other artists she'd modeled for. she liked that though, because she already knew it would be easy to make you squirm.

her eyes steadied themselves on your face. you were very focused on your work, she could tell by the involuntary frown on your face. when you looked up from your canvas you were met with a pair of green eyes staring directly at you. nervously, you tried to glance at a different part of her body, but that would betray you because the first thing your eyes landed on was her cunt.

you tried to cover up your action, but the sound of natasha's laugh indicated that she saw the whole thing happen.

"do you want a closer look?" her voice was raspy, causing you to freeze. "really, i don't mind. the second i saw your picture online i knew i wanted to fuck you."

you felt the air in your lungs leave your body. she stood up from her position and strutted her way into your personal space. natasha towered over you while you sat on your stool. she thrusted her hips lightly against your back so you knew she was in charge. it wasn’t long before her lips began to attack your neck. sloppy kisses littered the edge of your jawline, a generous specialty of hers.

"but the drawing, i haven't fin-"

"i don't care. now do you want me to fuck you in here or in your bedroom? i'd prefer the bed, but i could make eating you out on the couch doable."

your reply was stuck in the back of your throat, but you wanted her more than anything.

she traced the outline of your face before grabbing your chin, forcing you to look at her. "i don't have much patience and if you make me wait any longer, i'm going to punish you." natasha's eyes grew dark, completely different from the woman who initially walked through the door.

"bedroom," you squeaked, but before you could go to move natasha picked you up bridal style and carried you herself.

you almost regretted underestimating how strong she was by her petite frame. almost.

she placed you flat on your back and in an instant natasha had your clothes ripped from your body. "sweet girl, you won't know your own name by the time i'm done with you."

she tugged you closer to her so that she could prop both legs on her shoulders, keeping you wide and open just as she wanted.

natasha kissed the inside of your thighs as she worked her way up. your eyes screwed shut, and you found yourself fighting back the urge to moan.

the redhead wouldn't allow that though. she wanted to hear every noise you made slip from your mouth, and she would do anything to get what she wanted.

"open your eyes, let mommy hear those pretty little moans of yours."

she kitten licked the outside of your walls while massaging both of your breasts with her hands, occasionally twisting your nipples for extra stimulation. she dipped the tip of her tongue further into your pussy before retracting and going back to kissing your thighs.

"mommy," you whined.

you could feel natasha smile against your skin. "there you go, my love." you tried to grind your hips further onto her mouth by pushing upwards, but natasha's mouth quickly moved out of reach.

"ah ah ah, be patient. only good girls get what they want." you rolled your eyes and huffed, earning a loud slap to the side of your thigh. "do that again and your ass will be bent over my knee seven shades of red."

her glare went away as soon as she buried her face back between your legs. she was downright greedy, almost possessive over the gift between your legs.

natasha's role of being easy on you was put to an end. she shoved her tongue into your pussy, graciously accepting every inch you had to offer. seeing your back arch, hands balled into fists as they gripped the sheets, gave the redhead a sense of euphoria she'd never felt before.

"mommy please-"

"you're so beautiful when you fall to pieces." natasha purred. "aren't you glad mommy's taking care of you?"

your only response was a loud whine as her tongue flicked over your clit. "c'mon sweet girl, i know you can use your words."

"yes!" your voice was strained, a series of incoherent grunts and moans filling the room. natasha’s mouth covered the entirety of your pussy and her lapping only grew stronger the more you cried.

you clenched tightly around her tongue. your legs automatically reflexed to close, but that didn’t do anything for you except grant natasha deeper access into your cunt.

“m-mommy!” the feeling of natasha’s nails scraping the sides of your thighs was enough to let you know you could come. “mmm, that’s right baby. there you go.”

when she pulled away, you were greeted with the sight of natasha’s sticky, grinning face as she moved to sit on your stomach. she figured she could give you a small break before really fucking you senseless.

but that didn’t mean she would stop completely.

her hands found their way to your breasts, squeezing and pinching them again for extra stimulation. “you like that, don’t you baby?”

“yes, please, i want more!”

natasha giggled, mocking your pathetic pleas for her.

“not yet. don’t be the dirty little whore i know you are. now you’re going to lay here while mommy grinds on your stomach until she gets tired of it.” her hand offered a gentle squeeze around your throat.

“you’re going to have to draw me with my fingers shoved in your cunt before i let you cum again.” she taunted, slowly edging herself on your body. it wasn’t long before you began to feel her heat against your skin.

and truthfully, you’d draw whatever the hell she wanted you to just as long as she kept coming back.

[jiminrings]

I REQUEST A SOFT BADBOY DRABBLE WITH SHY READER AND HES TEASING HER BUT SOMEONE ELSE JOIMS IN AND THEYRE DOING IT TO BE MEAN BUT HES LIKE STFU BEFORE I PUMCH UR FACE ONLY IM ALLOWED TO BULLY SHY READER GRR 😡😡😡😡 and soft readers like 0.o but *squeals incoherently* 😭😭😭😭

last name, jeon.

drabble week: day two

drabble week masterlist

pairing: badboy!jungkook x shy!reader

wordcount: 3k

glimpse: "can't you tell that i really don't want you to be here?"

notes: a tiny change on the plot!! also: frat boy!jimin from day four makes an appearance :D

feedback + support mean the world to me!!

“do you wanna form-��

... yes

you DO have an alliance with jungkook

it's a very fair trade honestly

he pretends to be your boyfriend!! there's no specific boundaries to it, but he springs into action as soon as you're put into an inconvenience

in exchange, you whore him out to your friends!!! :D

no but literally that's how he called it

the whole reason this came to be in the first place is because you hATE confrontation with a burning passion

especially when it comes to those "i have a crush on you" moments that people spring on you all of a sudden

you don't like them back!!! that's the truth!!! but the problem is that you aLWAYS feel guilty letting people down

you obviously don't have the obligation to like someone back just because you sit next to them in class :// IT'S JUST IN YOUR NATURE TO FEEL THAT WAY

you wouldn't get into a relationship with said confessor to ease your guilt, clearly

do you plan on denying their advances? yes

but hOW????

you always take the passive-aggressive approach

you get jungkook to carry your bag and hold your hand, walk in front of said person and pretend not to see them, jungkook makes sURE to put some snide eye contact in there aaaaand the whole ordeal is finished :D

you've managed to let someone down slowly without having to speak to them in-person!!!

jungkook comes more handy than that too

you take him when you want to eat out because you're too anxious to eat alone

you take him when you want to go somewhere in which lining up is essential and you're also too anxious to stand by yourself

you take him when you want to go shopping when there's a sale but you're almost always intimidated by the barrage of people and salespeople so he asks and answers the questions for you

jungkook, in hindsight, is the perfect fake boyfriend for you <3

ALSO jungkook wants something from you

"whore me out to the girls from the families your family's friends with, and it's a deal :D"

that alliance and exchange is going pretty well so far

you mAY be on the more-reserved side but that doesn't mean you're self-aware!!!

you know that your parents are loaded and your shy nature could be somehow chalked to that since you didn't really have anyone that wasn't as non-superficial as you'd like, since they were the overprotective helicopter two-rotor seven-blade parents :(((

jungkook, however, is the only constant you have in your formula

you've known him since childhood and have been friends ever since

his mom's your mom's personal assistant, and one day when mrs. jeon couldn't find a babysitter for jungkook, your mom didn't hesitate to let four-year old jungkook come with her to work

jungkook's your fIRST actual friend that hates gold spoons with you because of how tacky they look :-) he's your emotional support person basically

your emotional support person who was sO close to running late from picking you up during his free day >:( you were about to break into a sprint if he arrived a second later, because you managed to spot a jock coming to you from the corner of your eye awhile ago

You Do Not Like Him <3

"and i even changed into a short-sleeved shirt to ward off your suitors. how romantic of me, don't you think?"

now that he mentions it, it's only now when you can drink him in in full-display

... wow

his right arm's the only one with his tattoos while his left's completely blank, but something about the balance just makes you !!!!!!!! even more

his arm's not completely covered but it was coming to be, something about the blank spaces of skin that are yet to be inked being a nice touch

"very romantic, kook."

now tHAT'S the answer he wanted to hear

he forcibly on your helmet for you to showcase, your grunts of annoyance being drowned out by whistling

(he's even looking left and right and making eye contact with anyone who has their eyes landing on you!!!!)

your cheeks smushed is a look he'll never be tired being in awe of, but he'll never tell you that, of course

"do you ever wonder if your parents would kill me if i misplace even a single hair on you?" jungkook thinks out loud and you don't even flinch with how sudden his thoughts could be, sitting on his seat first so it'd already be balanced when you do, "you sure you’re okay riding with me?? on a motorcycle????"

he usually uses yOUR family's vehicles (they let him and insisted he just takes one at this point) but when you called him, he was en route to kim kradle (it's a one-stop vehicle shop apparently) to get new rims for his motorcycle, bUT NOT ANYMORE HE GUESSES????

you come first compared to the booking he's waited on for three weeks

"i have insurance, i think."

no that's the wrong answer

why did you even bother.,,.,

jungkook flicks your nose because your forehead's protected by the helmet, his face contorted in half faux frustration

"you were supposed to be mad at me for asking that — not logical!! don't even joke about that."

"... my life insurance? like, in the instance that i-"

oW THAT HURT

he flicked even harder this time!!!

you roll your eyes at him and it doesn't go unnoticed, a hand outstretching instead of his fingers flexing

“wallet, please.”

????

jungkook's surprised that you even look confused, this time rolling his eyes at you

“you rolled your eyes at me. you need to bribe me so i won’t rat you out.”

right

he has a never-ending knack for the you're rich jokes

you also know that he likes the cold and would turn the fan on even if it's too hot for a blanket, just because he wants to feel cocooned

you also know that he picks from the fourth row of drinks from the front because it's always been a habit

("the germs cling on to the first row!!!")

you also know that maybe, just maybe, you can't stand it tonight when he's putting himself out there instead of being your faux boyfriend

you keep on zoning out and hoseok, perhaps the only tolerable fellow rich kid you can tolerate within your circle, finally connects the dots in his head and snickers

he's been talking about finding the vintage sneakers he's always wanted on depop and how he almost got scammed for like tWENTY minutes already

in reality, all your nods and scowls aren't towards his story

it's to jungkook and... who's that? jihye whose dad is so colossally shitty, that this one rapper wrote a diss song for him? oh yeah, that jihye

"you like him. like actually 'lose your virginity to him' love him."

WHAT???

there's no way

"how did you-"

"you blush like one."

alright that answer was too quick

hoseok should've ATLEAST tried to wait for a few seconds before answering

"a-and the love part?"

"babe, jungkook may not be the richest one here and that should say a lot," you peer up at him nervously and he actually chuckles, peering to everyone at this function, "dude's humble — he could also just be dense to not see you love him."

okay very true

hobi's making a dig rn at how jungkook coinicidentaally happens to be blonde and maybe this is your cue to leave

hobi does not realize that his hair is aLSO dyed blonde while talking shit about jungkook and his hari

okay this is it

once again, you are NOT listening to hoseok and he's figured out what you're doing by now

you're psyching yourself up with a couple of shots and your heels are digging on the carpeted ballroom

MAYBE YOU SHOULD TRY TO BE MORE OUTGOING!!

"pretend to wobble. it doesn't help that nothing can sink you."

oh okay makes sense

if you're gonna try and charm jungkook while trying to play it off as just being tipsy playfulness, atleast make it believable

hoseok snickers because this is just A+ content with the things that you choose to do in your way

shy girl with high alcohol tolerance mannn coming of age film writers would LOVE you ://

you're about to cross the distance between you and jungkook, but something knocks you on your shoulder with a gentle force that seemed intentional

is that-

hold on a second

"what a coincidence :O"

jimin?

jimin???

as in, wholesome yet slightly fuckboy-ish frat guy jimin???

he looks dashing and composed, meeting your eyes perfectly and he doesn't let your confusion startle him

"i know that look. what am i doing here?"

he says it eloquently as if he's practiced it

AND HE DID!!!

you must've looked so shocked that you immediately apologized, shaking your head no

"i-i didn’t mean-..."

you're confused, sure, but that doesn't mean you're immediately judging

it's just that you never saw jimin here or any function of the like, but you wouldn't put it past him if he does go to these things!!! he looks like a million dollars anyways

"relax, doll. you’re so far the only other person i know that i've seen in these type of things."

he looks calm and collected, but maybe that's just because he spent the last five minutes waiting for you to stand so he could bump into you

this place is just sO suffocating and a familiar face is gonna be his relief from something so fancy that it became mundane

"have we been in the same event before this?"

"not that i recall, no. i get invited but this is only the first time after awhile that i went."

jimin drinks from his champagne flute, wiggling his eyebrows playfully, "wanna know why i'm here?"

you're curious!!! what can you say!!!!

you never really interacted with jimin at all before this, but a familiar face like his is comforting

because hoseok's already engaged in another conversation and jungkook's,,,, being jungkook and is fawning all over jihye

jimin chuckles at your insistent nodding, leaning closer to whisper to your ear

"my stepdad’s loaded as fuck."

oh so that's why

he tugs you down to sit at the nearest possible empty chairs, all its occupants gone anyways because they're in the dancefloor busting tRULY horrendous moves

maybe it's because jimin feels lonely too like you are, and it's him feeling comfortable because he's pulled you like ten seconds ago and not once asked him anything out of bounds

maybe that's why he fell into conversation with you easily because you're always intently listening

"might love me as a real son too. maybe that’s a bonus? you don’t really expect that shit in the things you see."

this situation is actually pretty cute

you snort because maybe you’re nOT that shy when you drink,, that’s the only thing that changes in you probably

this whole conversation that sprung from boredom was unknowingly the subject of many stares, including jungkook who you were initially supposed to go to

“you’re worthy of love, jimin.”

:O

jimin sPITS his drink because where the fuck did THAT come from???

why did you say that and why does he feel that he needed to hear that

“i-i think — i think you need more,” he raises his own glass to your lips hurriedly, caught in surprise but you still gulp nonetheless

“you’re-“ you keep sputtering as he keeps making you drink, but he rubs circles on your back at the same time and it's when you realize that jimin the frat guy may not be that bad, “what??? don’t think you’re not the only one with daddy issues! shouldn’t we have like, a radar for each other?”

jimin snorts at your counter and his eyes crinkle to the point where he can't see anything, not being able to see how you're still trying to recover with all that fizz down your throat

wow ur really enjoyable to talk to

“you’re insane and i think-“

listen

you're not really big on feeling beyond a sense and all that stuff, but you feel as if the aura around you just got dark all of a sudden

"who are you calling insane?"

jungkook appears at your side in an instant, hands wrapped around your shoulders while you remain seated

you've honestly forgotten that you were supposed to go to jungkook, but you're reminded of that vERY clearly now

"go away, jimin," he mutters through his teeth, looking at him dead in the eye

hold on

wait

THAT'S JIMIN???

okay now he's confused

sometimes jungkook's mouth just moves on its own without loading the thought process

"why are YOU here?"

jimin furrows his brows, shocked that he'd even see jungkook here out of all people

the guy barely even attends classes!!! and that's coming from him!!

"why’s he here?"

he crouches to your ear, eyes still furrowed at the younger guy

"long story."

nO???

jungkook scowls bitterly because jesus fuck

YOU’RE ON WHISPERING TERMS NOW????

he left for one second, and the moment he comes back, that's when this fucking frat guy approaches you?? was he waiting on him to leave??

you and jungkook only act as a couple when the need arises, and even if you don't feel it, hE feels that this is the need!!! this is the need and it is arising!!!

"get back to uh, alpha bravo charlie or something, park. beat it."

why’s he reciting the nato phonetic alphabet???

jungkook sounds half-angry and half-sad at the same time, and you don't know which side should you focus on

“move,” he repeats this time again but more sternly, making jimin much more confused since jungkook's trying to pull him away from his seat

jimin doesn't budge and it makes the frown even more evident in jungkook's face

what is he FEELING

“can’t you tell that i really don’t want you to be here?”

“i’m not here for you, though. i’m here for y/n.”

he answers honestly, shis gut telling him that there's definitely something going on between the two of you

“y/n doesn’t want you here," kook argues back surely, only noticing your bitten lips now that makes him realize that you're not exactly sober; just a happy kind of rush

he sees you raise your hand timidly, an equally cheeky smile on your face that's only directed to jungkook like it's meant for him

"i-i actually don’t mind."

you don't,,,

you don't mind?

HOW'S THAT POSSIBLE

WHAT ARE YOU DOING

why aren't you signaling him to commence the faux boyfriend act!!

"y/n has a boyfriend."

“... i’m not hitting on her.”

alright this is more than the entertainment that jimin wished for lol

“yeah, well she has a boyfriend still so beat it.”

you do??

the last time you checked, jihye's gonna have jungkook as her boyfriend within the night!!

“i don-“

ALRIGHT THEN

jimin decides to indulge jungkook, knocking his knee with yours as he winks slyly, urging you silently to watch on, turning to look at you and ask

“what’s your boyfriend’s name?”

you don't answer.

that gives him all the more reason to do so.

“last name, jeon.”

jungkook looks the most determined you've ever seen him, eyes characteristically angry with his arms across his chest that his suit tightens, “first name, me.”

....

......

the three of you know that’s not the truth

jimin takes it in, sighing when he sense that something else is about to be unfold and he does noT want to be a part of it

not before whispering to your ear again for the last time, of course

“pretty weird name if you ask me,” you laugh automatically, momentarily forgetting that jungkook's standing by you on just your opposite side and could hear you

he leaves and that only leaves you with jungkook, looking up at him as he's too frantic to even sit

“what are you doing?”

“being a social butterfly," you quip just as fast, drinking your water afterwards

jungkook only clenches his jaw by then, being taken-aback when you speak again

“who are you doing?”

://

“i’m busy being mad at- wait a minute, WHO???”

who instead of what??

the short-lived enthusiasm you had with jimin left with him, crashing just as hard when you're reminded of jungkook's presence

“jihye’s a pretty nice girl. you should go home early tonight.”

his brows furrow, trying to get you to look at him but you avoid his gaze insistently, “what? what are you talking about?”

“she’s not my girlfriend though.”

you're not at all satisfied with the answer because it sounds so wrong, knowing that jungkook's a handsome guy and everyone wants to be with him!!!

and he probably wants to be with everyone else besides you.

“then who-...”

“don’t know yourself anymore? jimin must’ve really swept you off your feet, huh?”

jungkook huffs as he qualifies for a rebutt, your internal wallowing being cut short

“he’s not my boyfriend.”

...

....

“well would you look at that,” jungkook snickers, sighing through his nose as your eyes finally meet his, directly stubborn yet soft around the edges

“she’s not my girlfriend, and he’s not your boyfriend. what a coincidence.”

god did he feel so threatened the moment his eyes couldn't find you besides hobi and instead next to jimin, eyes crinkled in laughter without hesitation

have you been chasing after one another this whole time?

jungkook silently grabs you by the hand and you wave no opposition to it

maybe it's your liquor-influenced vision or maybe it's you hyperfixating on such a warm moment, but your eyes immediately lock to see the matching red thread bracelet he wore like yours

you're dressed in next year's spring collection line, and the structured silk black gown that has a train behind it doesn't exactly scream to have a simple red thread bracelet as its accessory according to your mom's designer and everyone else —

but you don't have the heart to take it off

there's no need to take it off

jungkook drives your car and no one says a single thing about anything

his hand’s on your thigh and you don’t question it, eyes locking into the way his hand looks perfect and the way the bracelet looks meant to be wrapped in his wrist in the first place

you're sure this time that it's not the newfound courage you have, but rather the need to do it

you kiss jungkook's cheek on a red light.

it's on a red light that jungkook realizes he could fit the visage of his world within one hand, finally kissing you like he's always wanted to

“yeah. what a coincidence.”

[drakenology]

“what that mouth do?” - w/ random haikyuu boys. because I dont know all the team names yet.

ft. bokuto, aakashi, kageyama & asahi

🎵 inspo song 🎵

warnings: oral sex (fem!receiving), cussin’, d+ddy kink, exhibitionism?, slight overstim, spit (yall know me), use of kitten in asahi’s sowwy, dash of somnophilia, a pinch of “cunt”

bokuto (mine)

i feel like bokuto would be the type to just get straight to it.

and believe you me he is a messy eater.

the whole room would be filled with sounds of him slurping and sucking all over your pussy

loves eating it from the back to prep you for the brutally beautiful backshots he’s about to bestow upon you.

also just loves your ass in his face.

fingers you and eats you out at the same time. (demon)

will tongue kiss you when he’s done to make you taste yourself.

talks about eating pussy to his teammates alll day. (much to their dismay)

he just loves eating pussy.

pussy eating experience: 10/10.

bokuto laid on the bed like a sniper with his sights on his target between your legs, hands resting on both thighs to keep you nice and spread for him. his tongue glides over your plush folds, poking and prodding at your entrance as his pretty eyes lock onto your face.

fuck, you were so beautiful like this; face scrunching up with every swipe of his tongue. you whimper as his fingers dive deep into your dripping sex, slurping noises ringing in your ears as he took your clit between his soft lips. you were blinded by pleasure, incoherent sentences flowing out of your lips of how good he was eating you right now.

bokuto nods, a cheeky “mhm.” sending you into a daze. your legs quiver and vibrate around poor bokuto’s head as you cum violently on his tongue. Even as your thighs are squeezing him to death he’s still licking you, riding you through your high and straight to yet another. Your back arched, your fingers entrapping into bokuto’s hair as you try and escape his killer grip on your hips.  “fuuuck, baby!” you cry, sobbing at the assault on your oh-so-sensitive pussy. bokuto can’t get enough of seeing you this way; begging and crying for him to stop. part of him loves your desperate pleas, relishing in every little jumbled swear you let out. 

aakashi (also mine)

another one who devours the pussy.

absolutely insatiable

will eat you anywhere... like anywhere

and will go all out on purpose so others could potentially hear you moan for him eek!

likes to 69 so your pretty mouth pleases him while he pleases you

high-key likes it when you get so tongue dumb that you can’t even focus on sucking his dick. 

loves to praise you; could literally write an essay about how good your pussy tastes

he’s just a damn demon ok?

you’re out trying on cute little dresses for aakashi; short ones to tease him when you go out. you smirk as you watch his face flush, loving the way he looked at you with such hunger. your panties soak at the thought of what he was going to do to you when you got home; what he might do when he sees you all dressed up pretty and ready to go out with your friends.

as you go to change out of the dress you tried on to put your clothes back on, aakashi rushes into the dressing room and pushed you inside. he doesn’t say a word, his feral eyes speaking every filthy desire for him. he kissed you, so hard you both stumble into the wall. clothes molted off your bodies quickly, aakashi lightly pushing you down onto the bench following you down. in an instant you spread your legs for him, panties wearing a wet spot as aakashi moans at the sight.

his lips are on you before you can even speak, a long, sloww drag of his tongue over your panties turning your thoughts to mush. aakashi rests your legs onto his shoulders as he kneeled in front of you as if eating you was a privilege. slowly he peeled your panties off to the side, looking up at you with those fucking eyes of his. he leaves these sloppy kisses all over your sopping wet pussy that were so intoxicating that you completely forget you’re in public with all the noise you start to make.

your slick mixed with his spit dripped down your ass and all over the bench as aakashi traced circles on your clit, leaving only to dip his tongue inside to really taste you. your breathing seemed to stop as you hold back your whimpers, catching your lip between your teeth as he pushed you down to your end. “yess. you taste so good, love. give me more.”

Kageyama (psh.. buckle up)

closet freak

mr. tobio likes to tease a lot

loves when you beg for him

in fact it’s mandatory that you beg for him

will not stop until you cum at least twice and even then you’re pulling him off you

leaves little hickies on your thighs as a reminder of how good he makes you feel everytime he revists your pussy.

Kageyama comes home late at night; a celebration of another successful game still lingering on his breath (probably from drinking all night). He stumbles inside, eager to claim his prize. Tobio shuffled into the bedroom you share to see you sleeping soundly, stomach flat on the bed and your perfect ass sitting right up as if to greet him.

He practically drools seeing you like that all but fully clothed, the only thing covering your body was one of his jerseys. You looked good enough to eat. Kageyama crawls on top of your sleeping body, trying to nudge you awake all to no avail as you snore away completely unaware of the savage beast leaning over you. He starts kissing your body, whispering your name to stir you awake as he trailed down to your ass giving it the biggest kiss so far.

“wakey wakey...” he whispers, snapping the waistband of your panties with his thumb, taking two loving fingers to prod at your clothed cunt. you stir, moaning as he moved you to lay completely flat on the bed. “there she is..” he smiles, looking at your half sleeping face. “T-Tobii. What time is it?” You whine, reaching for your phone only for him to pull you to the edge of the bed. “Doesn’t matter. Bend over.” Tobio groaned, drinking in your body as he prompts you to lay down with your ass up. You bite your lip, doing as your told.

“You’re in a good mood. You guys won?” You ask, eyes closed as he kissed your thighs, licking just below your now aching pussy. He was so needy for you, words only slowing the process of him getting what he wants. He doesn’t even answer your question, only thing he used his mouth for was to devour the woman who lay bent over for him.

Kageyama pulled your panties down about half way, just to get to your cunt as quickly as humanly possible. He prods at your folds, taking in the taste of your sweet juices as he moaned into you. You shudder, leaning into the bed to muffle your noise.

His hands explored your lower half, focusing on grabbing your ass and caressing your thighs then refocusing his attention on sticking his tongue deep inside you; just drunk on your body. You’re quickly reduced to a moaning mess, the massaging of his big hands along with the intense make out session on your pussy was just doing it for you. Tobio lost all composure.

Your pussy was quite possibly the best thing that had ever happened to him or maybe that’s just how it felt. Not a single spot of you wasn’t touched, filthy sounds of him tonguing you down caused you to utter filither things back.

“Tobiii!” You sob into the pillow, almost completely sure you’re crying. You start shaking, arching your back to get him to go deeper somehow, telling him you’re soo fucking close. Keep going, don’t stop, you urge him. He obliged happily, suckling on your clit and sinking his slender fingers inside you in such a way that caused you to boil over as fast as you could dig your nails into the sheets. You feel your slick drip down your leg, Kageyama pulling away from your leaking pussy to lick up your thighs not wanting a drop to go to waste.

fuck.. i’m hot.. i’m hot.

Asahi

huge slut for foreplay, he just wants to make you feel good

eating you out is now second nature to him

it’s kinda scary how quickly he’s learned your body; what to do and what not to do

ways to get the faucet running smoothly, ya know?

loves when you pull his hair, it’s like a sign he’s got you going crazy for him.

probably the one to stop eating you to get his dick in there, soooo needy.

Something about seeing you in a skirt just makes Asahi want to tear you apart. So when he comes home to you getting dressed to go out with your girlfriends he froze. Not only did you wear a skirt but you also had the nerve to put on some thigh high socks with it. Wherever you were going didn’t matter anymore. All that mattered was getting his face in between those thigh highs.

Asahi takes you by the hand and pulled you away from the bathroom sink, kissing you with sheer lust and passion. Even though your friends were blowing up, call after call falling on deaf ears you didn’t fucking care. You kissing your boyfriend became the only thing that seemed right. Fuck going out to be honest. Asahi whisked you away to the bedroom, laying you carefully over the bed. He crawled on top of you with this starved look on his face, as if he’d never taste you again.

“A-Asahi, I’m gonna be late.” You say, being completely ignored by Asahi. Whatever it was you said though didn’t matter, his hands running up your thighs and lifting up your skirt. You’re flushed, looking down at him as he pulled your panties off in one fell swoop.

“This will be quick, promise. I just have to have you, kitten.” Asahi chokes out, eyeing your pussy. He was usually the calm one; the one who brought you to beg for him but now he’s practically aching to taste you. And so he does, diving deep into your pussy with his tongue. Any rationality left your thinking, the sensation the only thing making sense to you right now.

Asahi now has your thighs pressed into your chest, spread just enough to lick your sweet cunt. Your knees cover half your face as you practically drool on them, his mouth working it’s magic all over your most sensitive spots. He takes his thick fingers and slides them inside with easy feat (its the wap for him.), causing your thighs to quiver. Your eyes roll back as you try holding your legs open for him, thighs quivering as Asahi makes it harder to do so.

“fuuuck, asahii!” you mewl, eyes crossing at every stroke of his tongue; every pump of his fingers. Asahi swore and pulled away, sloppily kissing you with his wet lips.

“I lied. I won’t be quick.”