#this is because i kept breaking pieces off... be safe my beauty

[katacala]

10.22.24 • the most beautiful plant in the world loves sunlight 🌿🩷☀️

[imabeautifulbutterfly]

Hello friend! I'm in love with your writing!!! 😍😍😍😍😍

Idk if your requests are still open but I'd like to request something if you don't mind!

I LOVED the hurt/comfort/whump fic you did for Hunter. Could you possibly do something like that for Tech x Reader?

Maybe Tech and the reader are on a mission together or maybe they've crash landed somewhere or something. The reader is badly hurt and Tech has to take care of her and treat her wounds and save her and comfort her in his own special Tech way 😂😍

Oh @arctrooper69 what can I say? I mean ... I think a thank you is just not enough. You have made my day with this request, so I took my time to give it the proper respect it deserves. I hope you like it. If it wasn't exactly what you were looking for I do apologize.

Please note that you are always welcome to send in requests. As this is a special request, it will be stored in my One Shots & Mini Series Master List.

The story got a little away from at 1400+ words, but I hope it's close to what you wanted.

And who doesn't love Tech. I love this adorable nerdy man.

Love oo,

His Promise

Warnings: Snow, injury, blood, explosions, crash, grief, fear, anxiety, hurt, fluff, near death, feelings of being a burden, getting in the way, I think that's it. If I miss any, please let me know.

Please note the explanation of Snow, Tech gives, was taken from the National Snow and Ice Data Centre.

AO3 Link   |   OS & MS Master List |   Main Master List  

The wind was picking up, as the snow piled down and was doing everything in its power to keep you and Tech from being rescued. You looked at the snow as it came down in sheets outside the entrance of the cavern he found, mesmerized by its beauty. 

“It’s beautiful and so calming …” you said slowly, your body already weakened from your injury and loss of blood.

“What are you talking about?” Tech did his best not to let the slowness of your breathing or even the breathless way you were speaking affect him. His anxiety was already high, and his fear of losing you was nearing his breaking point. 

“The snow…” you kept watching the soft flakes float down as they gently landed on the ground, piling on top of one another, almost as though they were unable to survive without the comfort of those around them. 

Tech glanced up to see the blizzard which prevented you both from leaving. As he watched the speed of the wind, he calculated it would’ve been nearly impossible for Hunter to bring the ship close to them. As he looked at the used bandages already soaked through with your blood his fear only grew. You needed immediate medical attention, more than he could provide at the moment, or it would mean certain death for you to be out here any longer.

Frankly, he couldn’t stop picturing the way you lunged forward as the ship crashed. He was helpless to watch you, as your body fell forward against the console, as a piece of the console broke off and jabbed you in your abdomen. It all happened too fast and somehow in slow motion. He could still hear your scream piercing his ear as he pulled you off the console.

He tried to stop the bleeding right away, however when he went to look for the med kit, he realized only too late that it had fallen out of the shuttle when the engine and the side compartment blew. All he had left were his emergency bandages and gauze and they weren’t nearly enough. 

At that moment, he couldn’t care less about how beautiful the snow was or how calming the blizzard looked from inside a cavern, that he only had to find because that piece of osik shuttle decided to have a fuel leak, catching on fire. 

Within seconds he had needed to drag you out of the relatively warm and safe shelter you both had, grabbing what supplies he could before the ship blew up. Thankfully, he had been able to send a message to Hunter when the shuttle crashed initially. So it was only a matter of time before the Marauder showed up, but …

His eyes fell back to the bundle of used gauze, his anxiety climbing as he knew you needed more first aid than he could provide at the moment. You needed the Marauder, you needed his med kit that he carefully stocked and kept safe on board the Marauder. At this point in time, he didn’t care about any kriffing snow.

“Snow is an accumulation of packed ice crystals. The condition of the packed crystals determines a variety of attributes, such as colour, temperature and water equivalent. As weather conditions change, the packed ice crystals can change as well, and this affects the characteristics of snow.”

You chuckled at his ability to pull forth information like it was nothing. Unfortunately the chuckle turned to coughing. Only causing you to dribble more blood out of your mouth, you wiped away what you could. He didn’t need to see that, “Tech …” you coughed again, “turn off your brain for two seconds, don’t think and just look. Just watch.”

He pulled the heater closer towards you, “Stop talking and try and warm up.”

“Tech…” you held his hand, “just look.”

His eyes drifted up your body, till he locked eyes with you. They were pleading for him to listen and to just have him appreciate what you found mesmerizing. He tried to follow your advice, focusing on the snow, but all his mind kept drifting back to was this blizzard that was preventing you from getting the medical attention you needed, so desperately. 

He shook his head focusing back on your abdomen, trying to stop the bleeding. Trying his best to keep you with him. 

“Tech,” you gripped his wrist “… stop …”

“No.”

His tone was firm and full of anger, why did he agree to let you come with him? If he used his brain instead of allowing his feelings for you to dictate his actions, you wouldn’t have been here. You wouldn’t have gotten hurt. Why did you always insist on following him? Why didn’t you just stay behind on Pabu? Simply because you wanted to see the galaxy, and he was excited to show it to you? It was his fault you were here. It was his fault you were in danger. It was his fault he … was going to lose you.

“Tech …” you squeezed his wrist. He removed your hand from his wrist, placing it off to the side as he focused on your wound. He didn’t deserve your touch, he didn’t deserve to have you comfort him. It was his fault you both crashed on this force forsaken planet. 

There was nothing you could do as you watched Tech pull away. 

From the moment you met him on Pabu, the way he worked with Phee as he helped rescue the villagers when the rogue wave was rushing towards the island, and the way he helped make everything more ‘efficient,’ you couldn’t help but fall in love with him. You wanted to learn from him, to listen to him go on with regards to anything and everything. Only problem was you never had the courage to actually utter the words you were dying to. Phee told you time and time again, ‘later’ was never a guarantee, and now as you lay on the cold floor of the cavern you were in, bleeding out of your abdomen, you realized how little time there was left. 

  Tears welled up in your eyes, as you realized you needed to unburden yourself. You needed to tell him what had been pressing on your heart before you didn’t have the strength to, it didn’t help that you were feeling weaker with each passing second. Also didn’t help that you could tell he was angry, actually a more accurate description would be infuriated, more than likely at you.

“I’m sorry.” You offered the only apology you could. “I’m sorry I’m such a burden, even now.” You took in a shuddering breath as Tech stopped moving his hands for two seconds as he focused on your face. “I’m sorry for always pestering you to teach me,” you offered, your voice barely above a whisper. “I’m sorry for not listening,” a tear slid down your cheek, “I’m sorry for putting you in this position. To have to feel responsible for someone like me.” 

He shook his head, his teeth clenched as his anger, grief, fear, and sadness overwhelmed him completely in that moment. He pulled off his helmet and placed it beside him. 

“Stop.” It was his only command.

“Please, I …” you coughed again, trying to not cough on him. “I just want … I need to …”

He cut off your speech as his hand cupped your cheek, “Cyar’ika …” tears welled up in his eyes, “you were … are never a burden.” He couldn’t believe that’s what you thought of him… that’s what you believed he felt for you. He shook his head again as he pressed his forehead to yours. “I have loved every second we have spent together. I made a point to record every moment with you, because they were more precious to me than breathing.”

You held on to his bicep, keeping him close as tears streamed down your cheek, “Tech … I … I don’t want to go… I want … I want to stay here with you…”

“You’re not going anywhere. I just got you …” his tears landed on your cheeks, mixing with your own, “you’ll be okay. I promise.”

“Hold me… please… just hold me until…I can’t feel your arms anymore.”

“I’ll hold you longer than that,” Tech pulled you into his arms, lifting you off the ground as he felt your body grow weaker. Your eyes were closed, your body was growing pale. He was so focused on you, he didn’t hear the voices calling out to him, at least not until he felt Hunter’s hand on his shoulder. He didn’t wait, there were no more seconds to lose. He rushed towards the Marauder with you in his arms, he wasn’t going to lose you. He promised. He was going to bring you back.

AO3 Link   |   OS & MS Master List |   Main Master List 

Tag list:

@liadamerondjarin @badbatch-simp24@spicymcnuggies@lady-ren @firstofficerwiggles @darkangel4121 @discofern @kavecika @monako-jinn-stories @ladykatakuri @avathebestx @theroguesully @furyhellfire66 @carodealmeida @ciramaris @sprout-fics @twinkofthedink @dindjarin-mandalorian @ulchabhangorm @tortor-mcgee @vodika-vibes @clonethirstingisreal

[azrielslightintheshadows]

I've got you.

Azriel x f!Reader

Request; Right now I'm kinda going mad because of uni and I came up with this idea of the reader that is like studying something to help the inner circle, but she can't find anything (or whatever came up to your mind love) and Az, her mate, try to reassure her with cuddle/kisses and lot of fluff.

Warnings; Mentions of potential death, reader feels useless

Masterlist.

Hope this is what you had in mind love <3

The words on the tenth book you were currently reading seemed like foreign symbols, your brain had turned into a mush and you groaned as you massaged your temples. Nesta’s powers disappeared when she saved Feyre from death and everyone worried that it might have an impact on her health, thus you were searching every book you could find. Rhys and Feyre wanted to help but they were preoccupied by Nyx and everyone else made sure they were safe and handled the matters of the court.  

“Come on, you can finish the book” you whispered to yourself and flinched when a deep chuckle sounded from behind you. 

“You should take a break angel” your mate’s velvety voice filled your ears and you smiled softly. He moved closer and placed those beautiful scarred hands on your shoulders massaging them. 

“I can’t stop now, I haven’t found anything and we don’t know how much time we have if it actually messes with Nesta’s health” you said and your bottom lip trembled. Nesta managed to become one of your dearest friends and just the thought of something happening to her made you want to rip your hair off. The fact that you couldn’t find something to help her broke your heart in million pieces. 

“Calm down angel, we don’t know if she is in trouble for sure, maybe that’s why you can’t find anything” he said softly and pulled your chair back, he marked the page of the book and picked you up. 

“Everything’s going to be alright” he murmured in your hair and sat on the armchair next to the big window of the study. 

“I’ve read ten books and I can’t find anything. I feel so useless right now” you confessed and hid your face in his neck. 

“You’re not useless baby, you are the only one who’s trying to find something about the situation.” He paused for a second “I think that this makes everyone else useless.” 

You shook your head with a smile “don’t say that, you’re all busy” 

“We are but that doesn’t change that you are researching without any help. Give yourself some credit and take some time to relax before you burn your sneaky brain”  he pinched your side and you gasped. 

“Stop” you whined and hugged him harder making him chuckle and kiss the top of your head. Two cups of tea appeared on the coffee table next to you and Azriel hummed, he picked one and pinched your side again to make you look. 

“I’ll return to my book if you keep this up” you feigned an annoyed expression and he smirked.

“No you will do no such thing, this is Azriel time and I’m not sharing” he scolded. 

You took the cup from him and leaned back on his chest, peeking at the view outside and enjoying his warmth. Azriel was staring outside while his hand rubbed soothing circles on your back. 

After a while you sighed and looked at him 

“I have to continue…” you trailed off with a sad smile. 

“Let me help you” he smiled and carried you to the table. 

You spent the rest of the day checking every book, even Azriel’s shadows started flipping through books.

“They can read?” You asked.

“I don’t even know anymore, they surprise me every day” he shrugged.

You kept huffing and puffing, moving from one book to another trying to make some sense but nothing. Azriel looked frustrated too and even his shadows slithered back to him looking defeated. Your eyelids started dropping and you blinked, you couldn’t stop now. You picked another book and started reading. 

You felt something cold touching your back and you hissed.

“Shh it’s okay I’ve got you” Azriel whispered, you opened your eyes and realized that he had carried you to bed. He stripped his clothes and lied next to you, pulling you on his chest and letting a sigh. 

“Get some sleep angel, tomorrow we will continue the research together” he murmured and kissed your head. 

The next day you managed to find a book with a similar story, thankfully the fae who gave away his powers survived and you both cheered and walked hand in hand to the dining room to inform everyone. 

Just before you entered the dining room you glanced at Azriel with a lovesick smile 

“What would I do without you”

Hope you enjoyed it!

@hauntedwitch04

[thewriterwhowritesnot]

To Have and To Hold

Warnings: Yandere!Aliucard, SMUT, creampie (wrap it before you tap it my dudes this is FICTION! Kids cost money), slight degradation, a little bit of fluff. A/N: Yall, please don't judge me. I had a hell of a rough time writing this out because I had to take a break every three minutes to BREATHE lol. I hope the smut is okay. I'm not ready to be that explicit just yet. I hope y'all like this. This is another 2k words and is not proofread. If you want to be in the taglist just lmk! Summary: You travel to Dracula's Castle to help the owner get the place registered as a historical landmark and enter into an overwhelming relationship with Alucard.

Masterlist Chap 1.

Chapter Two

 The next morning you awake to an old chest half your size in the middle of your room. On top of it, there’s a note.         “ I was informed this morning that your bag was lost in transit and they’re unable to locate it. I took the liberty of getting you some clothes to wear while you’re here. I hope they fit you and if they don’t we can make adjustments. 

A. “

A bit bummed at the loss of your clothes, you open the chest and immediately forget about what small things you packed in your bag. The first piece of clothing was a soft pink sundress with white flowers on it. The Queen Anne neckline was lined with white lace and you loved it instantly. Setting it aside to wear it for the day. There were multiple sets of silk pajamas. Pretty nightgowns and fluffy slippers and beautiful shoes (that were all your size). You giggled like a child in the long mirror against the wall, swaying this way and that. 

Granted, in your job description you wore clothes that kept your skin safe from poisonous spiders, cobwebs, and splinters. But the knowledge that Adrian had picked these out to lend you made butterflies spring to life in your belly and you couldn’t resist thinking of what he’d think of you in them. 

Deciding to bathe before you start your day, you enter the bathroom and examine the large tub and new shower head. The place was spotless and smelled of lemon. You turned on the faucet and allowed the hot water of the shower to steam up the room before getting in. Being too tired to shower the night before you basked in the warmth of the hot water washing the days of travel off your skin. 

However, your peace was short-lived because a rush of cold air cut across your skin beckoning a wave of gooseflesh. There were no vents or holes near the shower so you shut the water off and peered out of the shower curtain. The bathroom door was open and you struggled to remember if you’d closed it or not. Surely, you would’ve closed it to keep the heat in, right? 

         Stepping out of the shower you wrap yourself in a towel and enter the room to find nothing amiss. 

Strange. 

You searched the chest for the round container of lotion you’d spotted when you were rummaging through it earlier. After getting dressed, you leave your room, notepad in hand, and find your way to the kitchen. 

Marguerite is there and quickly introduces herself and offers you a full breakfast. Shamefully, you find yourself very pleased with the fact that she’s an older woman. Much too old to be romantically involved with your host. Her grey hair is pulled back into one bun, pulled away from her round face which is free of wrinkles. Her eyes are almost catlike which would appear almost frightening if not for their warm disposition and the childish curve of her features. She looks incredibly young and old at the same time. You watch as she pours you both a cup of tea and puts exactly four sugars into your tea. 

“How is your room?” Her voice is warm much like her eyes. Hoping she hadn’t noticed your staring, you mix your oatmeal in an innocuous figure eight. “It’s lovely. Everything is perfect and the bed is quite comfortable.” 

Marguerite hums with approval. “Wonderful. I put everything to right myself. The little prince would have nothing less.” Baffled, you turn to face her. 

“Little prince?” 

Marguerite’s warm eyes all but twinkle in the morning light. She sips her tea once before getting to her feet. “I’ve got some small tasks to finish before the morning ends. Once you’re done eating, you may leave your dishes in the sink. I’ll tend to them.” She doesn’t wait for your answer before she leaves, cup in hand.

Curious but too excited to think about it for too long you hastily finish your breakfast. Now, you have a system. Always begin at the first room you entered when you’re exploring a new place. It’s crucial to start in a familiar place so that each new discovery is easier to document and keep track of. Following this system leads you to head to the foyer. The room looked much the same as it had when you’d first arrived except for the streams of light that were pouring in from all directions. You’d missed the windows behind the humongous curtains that covered them the night before. Some of the windows were stained glass and you took a moment to examine them.

Each picture showed a man with dark hair in battle, covered in the blood of his enemies, and returning to the gothic castle you now stood in. 

“A bit grotesque, is it not?”         You jump and whirl around to find Adrian standing behind you much as he had the first time you met. “Have mercy! You’ve got to stop doing that!” His eyebrows draw together as he laughs lightly. Today his hair is in a messy braid down his back. The button-down white shirt he wears is tucked into the sleek black pants that sway over his sandy brown boots. “My apologies, my dear. I didn’t mean to frighten you.” His eyes travel from your face down your body and back up again causing those butterflies to flutter up to your heart. Fingers knotted in the dress you wore, your eyes scanned the room nervously. “Thank you for the clothes and the other things. They’re beautiful.” 

“I’m glad you like them. Does everything fit well?”         “Scarily well,” you joke. “I would’ve thought these clothes had been made for me with how perfectly they fit.” His jaw tensed slightly. Confused once again, you opt to examine the stained glass. You hear him inhale slowly.

“I’m told there’s a book in the library that describes the stories in these windows. Would you like to help me search for it?” 

The doors of the library are large. Just as large as the front doors. He pushes them open with ease and leads you into a room full of one of the largest collections of books you’ve ever seen. There are books on every surface. Lining the walls and stacked spaces all over the tables and desks. It was overwhelmingly massive and you took it all in wonder.         “The place is a mess and I haven’t hired anyone to help me organize it all just yet. It’s such a large collection.” 

“Can I help?” The words come out louder than you expect and you can’t see the smile on his lips as he pulls open the heavy curtains of the room. “If it’s not too much for you. I know you’ve only come here to stay a week. Are you sure you’ve got enough time for this?” 

Already eyeing a ruby-red book covered in dust, you nod vigorously. “I’ve got plenty of time. I’m the youngest historian of my group and I’m pretty sure my boss let me go on this trip because he figured it would keep me busy and out of the way of their more important jobs. Jokes on them though, this place is immaculate! I could write a million books about the architecture alone.” You glance over to see him leaning against a table watching you intently. “That is..if you would consent to that.” 

He sits motionless for a moment before shrugging. “I don’t see why not.” Grinning, you begin sorting through the books nearest to you. Several of them are in languages you’ve never seen and you examine them thoroughly. Organizing this library would not be easy but you were reluctant to think about giving yourself a time limit anyway. Judging by the size of this room alone, there was no way you’d be able to sort through it in a month let alone a week. The next three days, you focused on your task while pondering the idea of staying a little longer. 

During this time, you and Adrian had entered a rhythm. You’d wake up in the morning, he’d meet you in the kitchen and you walk together to the library. You’d spent hours in there reading over ancient stories of witches and vampires. All of them fill you with delight. 

You had become accustomed to Adrian being near you throughout this time. Relishing every moment, his skin brushed yours or he leaned over you to read whatever book you wanted to show him. It was on a late night almost identical to the others that Adrian had left without a word and reappeared with a tray with two cups and hot chocolate. 

“You didn’t have to bring me anything.” You replied after many thanks. He shook his pretty head. “Nonsense. After all you’ve done to help me, I won’t hesitate to do whatever I can for you.” He set a smoking cup in front of you before sliding into the chair closest to yours and sipping from his own cup. You watched him as he took a drink and you absentmindedly did the same. The scalding hot liquid bit at the skin of your bottom lip and tongue. You yelped. 

“Shit!” Adrian grasped your chin in one hand and sat your hot mug to the side.

“It’s smoking hot, Y/N. You can’t just inhale it that way.” He all but whispered as his callused thumb gently rubbed your bottom lip. 

“You did.” You mumble. His frown deepened and you watched his face as you impulsively let your tongue slide over the tip of his thumb. His breath caught in his throat. Less than a second later, he slid his thumb into your mouth and you wrapped your lips around it without a second thought. His pupils dilated as he tilted his head, lips parted. You tasted the cocoa on his skin and sighed breathily. 

Quickly, he moved his hand from your chin and pressed his lips to yours. Tilting your head, you leaned into him as he pulled you to his chest and slid his hands down your throat and shoulders. Past your arms and around your waist. Your arms find their way around his neck as you let him slide his tongue between your lips. The sound of your heartbeat and the noises you couldn’t help but make filled your ears. 

Just when you think you might have to lean back for air he breaks the kiss and presses his lips all over your face. Without a word, he lifts you by your waist and you wrap your legs around him quickly. He kisses you again, rougher this time. You don’t know how and nor do you care but soon your back is against the soft cushion of your bed and Adrian is leaving a trail of kisses down your neck and over your collarbones. 

After a moment, he rises and looks into your eyes. You can tell he’s searching for something but is unsure how to ask. The apprehension and obvious vulnerability tug on your heart and you place your hands on either side of his face. You nod, not waiting for him to ask. “Please.” You whisper. He closes his eyes and kisses you again before leaning back on his knees and pulling his shirt above his head from the hem up. You gasp when you see the long scar across his chest. It’s faded greatly, but the outline is still there and you sit up a little to drag your fingers across it. “What happened?” 

He looks to the right. “It was a long time ago.” He said nothing else and you didn’t press him. Gingerly, you pressed your lips to his chest and he shuttered against your lips. Like he’d never been touched there before. In a rush, he slid his hand through your hair held the back of your skull, and kissed you deeply. It was easier for him to undress and explore you without fear now. Eyes on yours, he pulled your panties from around your hips and slid them off. You giggled as he slid his cool fingertips between your knees and slowly spread them. 

You held your breath as his eyes roamed over your body. “So pretty.” He breathed and you whimpered as his hands slid down your thighs and over your pelvic bone. He kissed the bare skin of your shoulder, your knuckles, your thigh, your ankle. He inhaled your scent and you sighed with each touch. His fingertips found their way to the apex of your thighs and slid between your glistening lips. A shuttered moan falls from your lips and he chuckles. He kisses your temple while rubbing slow circles around your clit. 

Your eyes are squeezed shut as you teeter closer and closer to your orgasm. Without warning, he speeds up the movement, sucking the skin of your neck between his teeth sending shivers down your spine as your hips move against his hand of their own accord. In a burst of feeling you tip over the edge. A sharp shriek escapes your lips and it feels like forever before the shocks of pleasure end. As soon as it stops, you huff impatiently. It certainly wasn’t enough to make the heat of your skin cool down and the way he continued to caress your skin was only making it worse. 

He slid between your thighs and lined himself up with your entrance. “Are you ready?” He whispered in your ears. “Yes.” You reply quickly and he laughs at your eagerness. Then he gently presses the head of his cock into you. Both of you moan in unison. The air in the room thickens as he graciously waits for you to adjust to the intrusion. Slowly he edges himself all the way inside of you to the hilt and you fight to breathe. You had guessed he could fill you up but you hadn’t imagined it would feel like this. Your legs were still vibrating with the aftershocks of your first orgasm and you kiss his shoulder before telling him you’re ready for him to move. And that he does. 

Forehead to yours, he pulls his hips away from yours, leaving just the tip inside you before surging forward. The wind is knocked out of you and you squeeze your eyes shut as sounds you’ve never made before push out of your belly and mingle with his own. You lose yourself in the pressure and the rhythm as his hands bring your wrists together above your head. He holds them there with one hand and uses the other to pull your right thigh up higher on his hips. This allows him to reach deeper inside you and your back arches. 

Breath uneven, you raise your hips to meet his thrusts as your second orgasm oh so slowly gets closer and closer. Unable to see and barely able to hear, you beg him. “P-please. Please. Please.” You chant like a sinner praying for salvation. He presses his lips to your ear. 

“Please what?” 

You whimper. 

“Use your words.” He laughs against your skin as he leaves little bite indents on your forearms. The sound of your wetness echoes throughout the room, egging you on in the most obscene manner. All but screaming, you beg him to let you come. He murmurs “Good girl” in your ear and releases your wrists. He brings both of your knees up even higher and your hands grip his biceps as he plows into you. Almost instantly, your body tightens. Your eyes roll as your orgasm finally hits you, causing every part of your body to shake. This time you scream as he presses his hips into yours a few more times before stilling inside you. You watch as he closes his eyes and your name falls from his lips as he comes inside of you. 

Adrian lets your legs slip from his grip and lays down on you. The room is quiet save from the sound of your breathing. You can feel his heart beating against yours and you wrap your arms around him. Hand in his hair, you press your lips to his temple much like he’d done yours and he sighs into you. A smile dances across your lips as you hold him to you. 

“You’re so perfect.” He whispers. “I was going to say the same thing about you.” You reply. He exhales heavily and places a kiss on the inside of your elbow before getting up and entering your bathroom. You hear the faucet water turn on as he hums a song you’ve never heard before. He returns a moment later with a warm cloth and wipes your skin so gently that you feel your heart swell inside your chest. He continues to hum and the sound of his voice lulls you into a dreamless sleep.

Taglist: @hoppershoe. @c-crow-chatters

[mirixmoya]

hello friends welcome to GRADING TORTURED POET SOCIETY SONGS BASED ON HOW EASILY I COULD TURN THEM INTO A HAYFFIE FIC (PART ONE) i hope u enjoy.

(for those interested but also my own future reference when i eventual do turn them into hayffie fics hehe)

i. fortnight: 5/10. potential post-war effie reflecting on their pre-canon and during-canon situationship. the "i love you / it's ruining my life" vibe is very Them but i'd have to write my way around all the wife lines.

ii. the tortured poets department: 8/10. good early-to-mid-situationship hayffie. good moments for haymitch trauma angst stuff. "who's gonna hold you like me?" is them. the wedding ring line could be just them messing around while drunk one night during games season; it's when effie realizes it's Real.

iii. my boy only breaks his favourite toys: 9/10. excellent endish situationship hayffie vibes, 74th + 75th era. has good lines for effie as doll / toy / trinket (ha) imagery. also good imagery for effie and haymitch both being pieces in The Games. also "he runs because he loves me" and "he was my best friend" and "there was danger in the heat of my touch" ... need i go on?

iv. down bad: 7/10. good for their relationship between the end of the war and when effie actually moves to twelve. "how dare you think it's romantic / leaving me safe and stranded" literally them. also lots of good stuff for effie's post-war isolation in the capitol.

v. so long, london: 3/10. has the potential for a (book-verse) post-war angst fic where effie and haymitch try their absolute hardest but ultimately have too much trauma + damage to make it work. idk if i wanna do that tho.

vi. but daddy i love him: 9/10. excellent song for pre-canon hayffie all around. effie's relationship to her womanhood / escorting in the capitol? check. effie's inner conflict over her feelings for haymitch vs. her capitolborn beliefs? check. "dutiful daughter, all my plans were laid" but oh no haymitch ruined them! we cheered! joking that she's having haymitch's baby to her parents just to piss them off... very effie behaviour. excellent song for that Haymitch Is Unlike The Capitol Dandies Effie's Been Raised To Love theme that i like. "i know he's crazy but he's the one".

vii. fresh out the slammer: 7/10. good song for smack in the middle of their situationship. winter vs. summer parallels. effie's seasons without haymitch vs. games season. restriction with her capitol bfs vs. freedom with haymitch. "all those nights he kept me going". the end is good for a post-war hayffie happiness moment.

viii. florida!!!: 8/10. really good song for a Effie's Relationship With The Capitol fic. the isolation, the beauty covering ugliness, etc. "this city reeks of driving myself crazy". "at least the dolls are beautiful" that's literally about the escorts. "you home's really only the town you'll get arrested in" okayyy book-verse effie angst.

ix. guilty as sin?: 10/10. HORNY HAYFFIE ANTHEM. i need to get back in my writing proper smut era i fear. so so much material for haymitch worshiping at the altar of effie's hips and thighs. a song for people who believe that like a good 65% of their relationship is based on the fact that they're both incredibly hot and they both love having incredible sex. true love tbh.

x. who's afraid of little old me?: 9/10. excellent fic for the Effie's Relationship With Her Escort Career stuff that i love. "so tell me everything is not about me / but what if it is?" self centered queen! the general backstage horrors of escorting. "i was tame, i was gentle, till the circus life made me mean" ... "you wouldn't last an hour in the asylum where they raised me" ... "i am what i am cause you trained me" .... yeah.

xi. i can fix him (no really i can): 4/10. potential for a very very early situationship hayffie. general haymitch being a traumatized mess and effie trying her very hardest to help vibes.

xii. loml: 6/10. the first half is excellent for post-war hayffie coming back together. "who's gonna stop us from waltzing back into rekindled flames" yeahhh. but the second half ... the "you're the loss of my life" vibe ... could fit into the (book-verse) No Matter How Hard They Try They're Too Traumatized To Make It Work narrative but idk.

xiii. i can do it with a broken heart: 10/10. THE PERFECT SONG for 75th era effie being the perfect escort despite the fact that the world is falling away beneath her feet. "I cry a lot but I am so productive! It's an art!" is sooooo her. "i'm so obsessed with him but he avoids me like a plague" is haymitch avoiding her in an attempt to save her from Rebel Stuff but effie knows their relationship is only becoming more serious. she's miserable! she's hitting her marks! eyes bright! chins up! smiles on! everyone she loves might die! it's fine!

xiv. the smallest man who ever lived: 1/10. not a hayffie song at all. BUT potential effie + seneca relationship study fic?? mayhaps???

xv. alchemy: 7/10. good song for book-verse post-war post-torture effie going to haymitch in twelve. she's ditching the capitol, she's going back to her man! who are they to fight the alchemy? how could they ever deny it? his heart is reserved for her. the soulmastism! (not that they would ever admit that lmao)

xvi. clara bow: 10/10. ANOTHER PERFECT EFFIE CHARACTER STUDY SONG! the rose imagery? snow's impact on her life. "this town is fake, but you're the real thing". effie's relationship with the capitol / escorting / womanhood / fame / youth / patriarchy / etc. "flesh and blood amongst war machines" literally the escorts amongst The Games. "hell on earth is to be heavenly" + "promise to be dazzling". sexualization has liberated effie (given her a career, money, freedom) but at what cost? it's also her gilded cage.

anyway. thank u for coming to my extensive ted talk.

[ritualofcirice]

Lucifer's Response (Letter Three, a Lucifer x Reader)

🐑 ♡ Continued thanks to Sycamore for beta'ing, you're the sweetest sweet ♡🐑

You sent a love letter to Lucifer, and he responded.

Teen and Up Audiences, No Warnings, F/M, M/M, Other/M, Tag(s): Love Letters, Fluff, Awkwardness, Gift Giving, Emotional Baggage, Ambiguous Gender Reader, POV Second Person

Find it on ao3 ♡ WC: 801

Chapter 3

Letter Three

With the arrival of your letter, you were more than excited to dig into its contents. Then you were given a box wrapped in hand painted paper and tied up in a pretty bow. There was nothing that could have calmed you down when you received that box. You danced around the room with it like it was your partner in a musical number until you heard a clunk. It was safe to say you decided to settled down after that.

You didn’t want to break it. Whatever ‘it’ was.

It took you three excruciating minutes to peel the paper off of the gift without ripping it, and you folded it with care to put aside for safe keeping. Part of you admired the craftsmanship, while another part of you fretted about the lack of storage you would have if Lucifer kept giving you beautiful things most considered trash.

You did not need to keep the wrapping paper. Was that going to stop you? No.

What you pulled out of the box was a duck. Little legs dangled beneath it as you scooped it up, and you spied a card inside that had ‘instructions’ written across the top. You turned to the letter for any other information, but moreso because you wanted to lose yourself in the words of the person you cared for.

Nothing could compare to him.

‘Dear my darling Secret Admirer, Okay, there is a lot to get through and limited paper. First, I hope the gift made it to you. I’m not sure if they're going to be delivered at the same time, but I hope so. I won't spoil the surprise if that's the case. If they are together then surprise! I hope you like it! I wanted to give you a little something back since that folded paper duck you gave me was amazing. Amazing like crazy amazing. It’s so cute, and I love the googly eyes. I spent the good part of an evening trying to find a fitting home for the tiny thing. Given my last letter, I thought the gift I gave to you would hold somewhat more sentimental value. There are instructions for how to make it work too. I popped them in simple terms, but if you can’t get it working please let me know! Second, I wanted to let you know that your suggestion is most appreciated. I just want to ask again though, what if I’m not who you think I am? I’m not saying no to your offer to meet up somewhere, on the contrary! Just name a place and a time, and I’ll be there! I know we’re getting to know each other, and you seem lovely, genuinely lovely. There’s no problem. The problem is me. Ignore what I said about no problems. It has been a long time since I’ve been out is all. No doubt the culture in Pride hasn’t changed at all either, and a gun fight doesn’t make for a good place to relax! I bet you like your food as blood free as I do. Please tell me you don’t eat people. I might need some time to accommodate to your appetite if you do. Do you want to come over to mine? It’s okay if not, I want you to be comfortable. And again you can pick wherever, but if you want to visit me then you’re welcome. Is it okay for me to invite you over on a first date? I would like it to be a date if you’d give me the honour. I gather that was your intention with the offer. Anyway, I’ll get to my third point. I haven’t done anything like this in a long time. Like a long, long, long time. It’s me all on my lonesome! Still, I want to make this work, and to do that I have to tell you that I'm struggling. I'm not perfect. I need honesty because I don't think I could handle losing someone else right now. Knowing this, please tell me if you don't want to see me anymore. Or even send letters. I’d understand if you didn't want to. I wouldn't blame you. It's not your job to pick up the pieces with me, but you'd have to watch if you were by my side. I wouldn’t want you to step on any shards and hurt yourself. You terrify me because all I want is to meet you. I do. I want to know the face of the person who had the kindness to reach out to me. I love you, and I'm sorry for all of this. As I say, just name a time and a place. Or never. Whatever you choose, I will honour it. You have my word. Kind regards, Lucifer M.’

♡ Letter four ♡

[aoibhinnslater04]

Kanej AU

The scene (specifically from the series rather than the books but basically the bathroom scene) where Nina doesn’t interrupt them and Kaz doesn’t decide to sabotage himself

Basically a whole load of Kanej angst!!

Word count: 1697

Requested by @arany-studio

TW: mentions of rape, trauma, injuries

Kaz walked into the small room to find Inej packing her knives. He saw her pause at the sound of his steps, her head tilting slightly towards him, before she resumed sorting her knives. 

"You've been lying low?" he asked, his voice rough. 

"I've been gathering Intel on Pekka's assassin. I've discovered my bladesmith supplies him with bone-cutters and fillet knives," she responded, still not looking at him. 

"Taxidermy tools," Kaz choked out. 

"His name's Mogens. I've got his address,"

"That must have cost you."

Inej cut him off. "A new set of blades." She paused before continuing. "He intends on taking me alive, so he can put me back in the Menagerie."

"I won't let that happen," Kaz said gruffly. 

"And why should I believe you?" Inej asked, sharply, turning to face him at last. "We were ambushed, Kaz. Whatever this is, this blood feud you have with Pekka Rollins, I don't believe it's about some Saints-forsaken club! You are gambling with our lives and I deserve to know the reason! You owe me that much," she spat out, the first time Kaz had truly seen her angry. She always managed to find something positive about every situation, even being taken by slavers, sold to a Menagerie where she was abused and raped nearly every day, because her parents and brother weren’t there with her, they were safe, they were alive. Suddenly a bright red staining her sleeve caught Kaz's eye. 

"Inej, your arm," he whispered, his eyes fixed on the blood spilling out of her. She paused and glanced down, before sighing and rolling her eyes. She seemed to whisper a silent prayer for patience before removing her shirt, leaving her with just a vest on. She checked the bandage, before removing it, wincing.  Kaz looked away, unable to bear it, before finally answering her question. 

"Pekka Rollins killed my brother."

He felt Inej stiffen slightly, and heard her turn to face him. There was a long moment of silence, as she searched his half-hidden face, before finding whatever it was she was looking for. 

"Then we destroy him."

Kaz turned his head quickly up to face her, and saw the openness and anger in her face. She meant it, too. They shared a look, a brief moment where they were both just two people in pain, where they could get comfort from each other, before Inej winced again, and the moment shattered. She glanced once more at her arm, before turning away from Kaz again, reaching for the alcohol to disinfect the wound. She poured some on a piece of linen, and started dabbing at it, twisting her neck to make sure she was reaching every bit of the exposed cut. Kaz, hardly even aware of his own body, moved towards her. She glanced up at him, her beautiful doe eyes searching his face, before she turned to the cut again. Kaz reached out his hand silently, an offer. With her eyes now again on his face, not moving, as if hypnotised, she handed him the cloth. He wasn't able to remove his gloves, not yet, but he hadn't  been so close to another human being since Jordie had died. 

Inej saw his momentary hesitation, and turned away from him, allowing him to move at his own rate. He reached towards her, dabbing at the wound with the cloth. He heard her breathing hitch slightly, and kept dabbing, not wanting to break the spell by speaking. But then Inej spoke, her words soft and hesitant. 

"Is there anyone to protect you?"

You, Inej. You. 

But instead he responded, slightly harsh, "Was there no one to protect you?"

Inej turned to look at him, her face soft and vulnerable. She opened her mouth, but he cut her off before she could say a word. 

"Look for Mogens' tells. Signs of an old injury that point to a weakness or a repeating action that tells you what he's going to do next."

He saw her face turn contemplative, before she asked hesitantly, "Do I have one?"

He turned his head back to her soft brown skin, before responding "you shift your weight onto your back leg before you lunge. "

She turned fully, facing him again. He stepped back slightly, cursing himself inwardly. She whispered, so softly he could barely hear her. "What's yours?"

Kaz paused, before looking her in the eye. "The limp. The cane. No one's ever smart enough to look for the real one."

Inej moved slightly, just an inch towards her. It was as though his senses were heightened. He smelt her gentle jasmine scent, saw her lips slightly parted, heard her soft breathing, felt her gentle touch as she recovered the cloth he forgot he still held, and all he could think about was her nearness. He hadn't so much as removed a single glove, but he felt as vulnerable as though she had stripped him naked. 

Kaz cleared his throat before stepping back, grabbing the fresh roll of bandages off the bench. Inej obediently turned away again, allowing him to take a deep breath. The silence was killing him, and he spoke without thinking. 

“You know, I don’t find this part easy. The cutting, the slicing, causing pain is the easy part. Repairing the damage afterwards is far more difficult.”

He wondered if she knew that he wasn’t talking about her wound, then, not really. He was trying to explain that although he was broken, he was trying to repair himself, trying to fix the cracks to become the sort of man she would be proud of, that Jordie would be proud of. 

Inej let out a deep breath, sending strands of her dark hair fluttering outwards. Kaz reached out automatically, smoothing her hair down against her head. She stiffened, and so did Kaz, that brief moment of automatic affection an oddity to both. But Kaz then again, feeling almost dizzy with desire, allowed himself to gently stroke her hair. His gloves were still on, a barrier that separated them, but as he felt Inej relax at his touch, he allowed himself to want more, to want Inej. Perhaps one day she might want him too.

Inej cleared her throat, bringing back reality. “Once, when I was much younger, the first time that I tried to walk across the tightrope, I fell. Not when I was on the wire, but at the end, can you imagine? I fell, and hadn’t yet learned how to fall properly. My parents ran to me, but I didn’t feel the pain. I think I was in shock.”

Kaz waited, sure she had a point to this story.She hesitated, before continuing.

“I broke my leg in three different places. My mother thought I might never walk again. My leg healed, but some scars still remained. I couldn’t walk on the tightrope for months, fearing what would happen when I reached the end.”

She turned to face him now, causing him to step back.

“Finally I decided enough was enough. I had been afraid for too long. So everyday for three weeks, instead of walking across the tightrope, I would climb the ladder and just stand at the end. I stood there for an hour that first day, until I had calmed enough to climb down. The second day, I stood there for forty five minutes. Finally, I was only standing there for a few seconds. It took a long time, and the end is still my least favourite part, but I fought against my fears and won.”

She stepped closer to him, and this time he didn’t move back.

“You will fight your fears Kaz Brekker, and then one day you will live without the same fear. It might still hurt occasionally, but you are stronger than you give yourself credit for.”

Kaz looked down at her, his face soft, open and vulnerable. Inej looked straight back up at him, her eyes wide and searching, waiting. Kaz bent down slightly towards her, and brushed his lips slightly against her forehead in the gentlest kiss. Her eyes shuttered closed briefly, the softest sound escaping her throat, but she didn’t move. She allowed Kaz to tell her without words what he was capable of, what was too far and yet not enough. She allowed the broken man before her to fix a small, fractured piece of himself, before she stepped back, quivering slightly. She was feeling everything all at once, her emotions threatening to overwhelm her. But she stayed steady, and breathed, like she was at the end of the wire once again. Kaz gazed at her, his expression full of wonder, like a young boy, his future full of possibilities. 

She turned, so he wouldn’t see the tears that had filled her eyes, and grabbed a hairbrush, unpinning her plait to rebraid it. But he held out his hand, and said, softly, gruffly, as if he, too, was fighting back unshed tears, “Let me.”

Inej handed him the brush, and climbed onto the small bench in front of him, and as Kaz began to gently brush her hair, untangling the knots with such care it was as though he thought she might break at the slightest tug. Inej allowed, then, the tears to fall. She didn’t see that Kaz, too, had tears trickling down his cheeks. 

She let out a deep breath, she didn’t realise she had been holding, shuddering slightly, and allowed her eyes to shut for a moment. It had been so long since she had slept, and she had never felt so tired, as if her emotions had drained her more than usual. Her body swayed slightly, but then felt Kaz steady her. He gently laid her back onto the bench, and she felt him move away. She thought he had gone, but then heard his uneven steps return. She felt the softness and warmth of a blanket cover her, and felt him gently lift her head to put a pillow underneath. 

“I thought you had left me,” she whispered, her voice heavy with sleep.

“Never,” he vowed. “I will never leave you.”

And then Inej fell asleep, guarded by the healing man above her, his dark eyes keeping watch, protecting her from anything that meant her harm.

[blackwolfstabs]

If you're ever low on ideas and comfortable with it, I've had this idea which means a lot to me that I'd love see you put into your own words one day.

Basically, some time after Scream VI, Chad and Tara try to work themselves up to doing the deed (no outright smut or explicit stuff though pretty please, not the point here), and Tara totally freaks out when she can't bring herself to take off her clothes and show all her scars to another person. While I wouldn't expect Chad to really care about his, I'd always thought this would be an issue for Tara considering how much she wants to feel normal after everything that happened to her. As someone who still has visual reminders of a prior major surgery, I can speak from experience that feeling like you're less beautiful or desirable because of that is a really terrible thought. I can totally picture Tara feeling all the nervous butterflies about the sacred occasion of losing her virginity only to realize the scars from her snapped leg and all the stabby stabbies, everything she's trying to forget, are never going away. Feel free to experiment with how they'd react to and handle this situation, it was just a fleeting idea, but I think it could be something really sweet.

P.S.: You're like the only writer I know of that appreciates Chara and I just wanted to thank you for that because I adore them sooo much lol, they don't get enough love.

aww it's all my pleasure, dear anon. i hope i do your idea justice! 🫡

here you go:

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

IF YOU LOVE HER

Drawing stars around Tara's scars.

fandom: Scream pairing: Tara Carpenter × Chad Meeks-Martin characters: Tara Carpenter & Chad Meeks-Martin a/n: i love this idea sm and i actually got really into it so my apologies if i went too deep or made it too long. you've got good taste, my friend :)

───────────────────────────

“Are you sure?” Chad whispered, his forehead locked with Tara’s as they blinked into each other’s chocolate eyes.

Tara nodded, not breaking her eye-contact, even though she was trembling. She loved Chad, she did, and if anyone was going to take her virginity, she wanted it to be him. It’d be safe with him, for she was sure he loved her just the same. They had been through so much together. She couldn’t ask for a better partner. “Yeah,” she breathed, “I want to…”

In the privacy of his half-lit bedroom, he nodded and removed his shirt, letting her take the lead as she gently pushed him down onto his bed. She climbed on top of him, her legs straddling him to lean down and capture his lips. 

Tara melted into her boyfriend quickly, pulled in by the serene essence of the night and his love. She felt his hand slide over the small of her back and move towards her hip, while she trailed her fingers down his right pec to his rib cage. Her fingertips curled into his ribs as his own slipped beneath the band of her pants. 

They parted, but Chad kept his digits beneath the hem. He eased them a little farther to have the tips meet her underwear. She shuddered with a small gasp, instinctively dropping her pelvis as if to stop him from going any further. His face must’ve changed a little to show some concern, because she quickly looked away.

“I-I’m sorry…” She grew shy as she hesitated on where to look. 

“Is that too far?” he quizzed, retreating his hand a little bit.

“No, it’s fine, I just…”

“Would you rather do it?” He tucked a stray piece of hair behind her ear to catch a better glimpse of her face.

She took a deep breath, before gathering up the courage to look him in the eyes again. “No. I trust you.” Her voice was barely above a whisper.

He nodded. “Okay…” He turned his face to the side to kiss the arm she still had bordering his head. She then resumed her former position again, and he decided to take a different approach. “We’ll do this first.” He moved his hand away from her bottoms and eased her shirt up, until he met her bra-line.

Carpenter braced herself against the fresh air that corralled the newly exposed skin of her torso. She knew the build-up to giving her virginity away was supposed to be nerve-wracking and anxiety-inducing, but she knew that the intensity she felt growing in the pit of her stomach was of a different essence. However, she had to keep herself together. This was the hard part. After everything was off and out of the way, there was no going-back and hopefully, she would be immersed into a world of love and not rejection. That’s how sex went, right? It was captivating and a rather surreal experience? Guess she was going to find out. But she had to stay strong to get there, so she ducked her face into the crook of Chad’s neck to try and compose herself.

Her boyfriend breathed in her warm scent, leaning his head against hers as he wrapped his arm around the bare portion of her back with one arm and used the other to tug her pants down a little bit. He heard her give a small whimper, to which he kissed her shoulder. “There’s nothing to be scared of, Tara,” he assured her, “I got you.” 

She felt his nose brush her ear lobe as he said this, his breath tickling her neck. As safe as she felt in his arms, she couldn’t manage to make any words and instead, just nudged his jawline in a nod. She was wearing high-waisted pants that were steadily pulled to a mid-rise and then a low-rise as Chad edged them further down her hips. 

Her heart skipped a beat, jumping into a race that made her nearly start to panic. His other arm brushed her spine, forearm pressing through her bra to leave his fingers closing around her ribs. She shut her eyes tightly and pressed her lips to his neck, forcing herself to focus on softly suckling his skin to fight herself from changing her mind.

Below her, Meeks-Martin heard a shuddering breath that mimicked her figure. He knew she was anxious about this, especially with how protective her older sister was and how inhumanely her body had been handled before. That was why he let her be on top for her first time. Both of her Ghostface attacks—which had left her with trauma she still re-lived—ended with her pinned beneath her attacker. He was well aware of what having her take the submissive position might do. The hand that held her ribcage slid down the curve of her flank, finding new territory that hadn’t been explored from the coverage of her pants.

His girlfriend accidentally traded her lips for her teeth, biting down on his sternocleidomastoid muscle. It was a fearful kind of nip, so it wasn’t necessarily painful, but it had caused him to pull one hand away from her hips and caress the side of her head.

“Easy, babe… Just breathe. I won’t hurt you…”

She swallowed uneasily, wanting to say something to assure him but also defend herself at the same time. She didn’t know what to do. However, when his fingers found the scars hidden on her lower abdomen and his arm pressed into the ones littering her lower back, she couldn’t take it. Every hurtful thought she could hold against her self-worth felt like a knife stabbing through her survivor’s tattoos again to emphasize the damage they did. Tears filled her eyes, and she didn’t even think twice as she pulled away. “I can’t!”

Chad sat up when she got off of him, finding her tugging her clothing back to their proper wear and hearing her breath hitch as she bowed her head in shame. 

Tara’s chest went extremely tight as she broke down, eyes burning and butterflies swarming her stomach at the anxiety that cursed her yet again. But this time was different. She hated doing this to Chad, because he didn’t deserve it. “I–I’m sorry, Chad…”

“For what?” He moved to sit beside her. “What is it?”

More tears fell, seeming to grow thicker the longer she stared at her legs, which were clenched together. She felt his hand rub small circles on her back, but that just made her grow even more tense. Her initial reply was replaced with a sob that had her whole body jolting.

“Hey, hey, hey…” His concern grew, once she broke down completely, a few whimpers coming through her sobs as she covered her face with one hand and hugged her torso with the other. He got down on the floor to kneel in front of her, reaching up to brush her hair back. “It’s okay, Tara, it’s alright—”

“I ca-han’t do it, Chad!” she cut him off, only able to compose herself enough to get the shortest explanation she could out. “I-hit’s so uh-hugly!”

He paused his combing. “What’s ugly?”

Carpenter cringed inward on herself, clutching the flank of her shirt so tight that her knuckles turned white. She pulled her knees up to hug them with her other arm, hiding her face in the small space between her thighs and torso. “M-my scars…” She spit it out around her accumulating congestion.

Chad’s eyes immediately fell to the arm that curled around her legs, how her hand reached to the side that he couldn’t see. It was the hand that had that long scar gifted from self-defense against Ghostface—her first attack. What a reminder… What a memory…

What a tragedy…

The exact one that had him view her like she was the strongest person in the world, even though she was the smallest of the family they’ve made. She was the strongest. She had survived being stabbed 7 times, a broken ankle, blood-loss, surgery, a 2nd attack, facing-off with her attacker, suffering heartbreak, and spent another period in the hospital, which she had grown to hate… But after every single fallout, she picked herself back up and kept moving forward. 

Tara Carpenter was the living proof and definition of a survivor.

And Chad Meeks-Martin was in love with her. 

She wasn’t second-best or his chosen one, due to their share of trauma. He started falling from the first day they met all those years ago, when they were too young and naive to understand what love was, what pain was, what trauma was, and all of the things that divided them. Tara’s home-life started to go downhill around the same time he was getting serious into football, so he wasn’t around her much anymore. Being a jock came with many things that kept him present in his future yet absent in his past. And sadly, Tara was one of those things—those precious things that he had unknowingly been driven away from. Liv came along, and they hit it off for a while, but when Tara was attacked, it all changed.

He didn’t care if she had scars. He didn’t care if she was too scared to let him in. He didn’t care if she pushed him away and screamed at him to leave. He’d wait on her forever. He didn’t see her scars, when he looked at her. He saw his angel—the one he swore he’d never see living, in-person, and in his reach. Yet, she was. And had she not endured it all, he might have never gotten that privilege.

As she continued to cry, Chad spoke to her softly and sincerely. “No, they’re not. Tara, there’s nothing ugly about you—”

However, she denied him. “Yes, they– Chad, I’m hideous…” 

She was convinced. Her scars were curses, hidden beneath her clothes to fool anyone that might actually want her. Anyone who might desire her. But she wasn’t desirable. One look at the marks giving her stomach, back, and legs an abstract design and anyone with a decent taste would turn away. She was destroyed, wasted, used, and corrupted. How could she be beautiful? How could she move on when every time she changed clothes, or took a shower, or wore anything but high-waisted jeans or pants reminded her of how defenseless, weak, and exposed she was? How alone she was… and that loneliness created a masterpiece that only the artist could admire. It must be hidden from the rest of the world or else it would leave others feeling sick and appalled.

Because she wasn’t supposed to be a piece of art. She was supposed to be dead.

Who could ever love her intimately when she was literally a human pincushion?

Chad could. And he did.

“Tara,” his voice was a little stronger this time. He slipped his hand onto her thigh and encouraged her to lower her legs. “Tara…” Luckily, she did lower her legs, but both arms held herself tightly and she hesitated to look up. “Hey…” 

Tara sniffled and wiped her nose, before raising her eyes enough to look at him. And of all things… he smiled at her.

“Stop, that isn’t true,” he told her. His eyes shimmered in the low lighting. “I’ve never met someone more beautiful than you. Your scars aren’t ugly. They don’t change who you are. I promise you, one day, you’re gonna look at every single one of those scars as a reminder of how strong you are.” Her soulful eyes just blinked at him, glossy as more tears slid down her cheeks. He wiped them away. “You’re so strong, babe.” 

In that moment, she swallowed, staring at him as she recalled those traumatic memories. The phone calls, the teases, the taunts, the stabbing, the crawling, the begging, the screaming… Those things didn’t make her feel strong at all. They were demeaning and humiliating. “I don’t feel strong… I’m not fearless, like Sam. I’m not smart, like Mindy. I’m not reliable, like you…”

On the other hand, all her boyfriend could think about was her smile, her sharp-tongue, and her gorgeous eyes. The way she moved and how she handled everything that came her way. The way she loved him and how healing her existence was to him every day. She was the reason he fought, held on, and kept going. When he had sacrificed himself for her at the kill theater, taking a thousand stabs, while looking at her the whole time, telling her to “go”... he did that because he couldn’t live without her, and because he couldn’t live without her, he held on until he was found by paramedics and was united with her again. Everything she was saying about what she wasn’t couldn’t be more wrong. “You’re a survivor, Tara. You’re Tara Carpenter, and you’re not like other people. You’ve got a will that’s so strong, you’ve managed to look death in the eyes and win… multiple times. And those scars are proof of it.” She was unparalleled to anyone else in this world. “You are you. There’s 7 billion people in this world, and you’re the perfect one for me. What are the odds of that?”

Tara bit her lip. She wanted to believe him. Truly, she did. But she hated all that her body had become, especially when it had to be exposed in situations like these. They weren’t mental scars that time would heal, they were scars that would be there forever. She would never be able to escape what had happened to her, no matter how long she lived or how much she may try to cover them up. 

“I love you, Tara.”

Her breath hitched as she sniffled. “I love you too, Chad…” Her next words were barely audible, when they came out. “Thank you…”

Chad just smiled at her. Even with her bloodshot eyes and runny nose, she was flawless. He reached out and took her left hand. His thumb brushed over the long scar tainting the top of it. 

She didn’t dare look down, the soft touch making her lips quiver again as more tears threatened to fall.

But then he brought it up to his lips and trailed a line of gentle kisses along the length of the scar, covering the pain it caused her with loving stitches.

Tara watched him do this, then glanced up to his face when he lifted it and guided her hand to rest against his cheek. “Chad…”

“You are so beautiful,” he simply replied. And to his surprise, he received the smallest smile from her, even through her tears. Then, he dropped his eyes to where her right arm guarded her torso. He squeezed her hand a little, “Can I see them?”

She froze, her anxiety climbing again. Her brow twitched, fighting herself to stay where she was and not pull away from him again. He deserved this. He deserved this. 

If he loved her…

He did love her. There wasn’t a single doubt in her mind. So, she exhaled a shaky breath and nodded, slowly removing her right arm and retreating her left to uncover the sacred tattoos that made her a palette of a million colors, some not even of this world. She held her breath as she tugged the hem of her shirt up with one hand, then pulled her pants down with the other to expose her stomach.

There were two big scars, one just below her left rib cage and the other beneath her navel on the right side. Chad moved to be directly in front of her and was actually allowed to come closer when she opened her legs for him to kneel between them. His hands were soft as he placed them on her warm sides. He felt her shudder, telling him she was still hesitant about revealing her permanent demons. But instead of trying to talk her down again, he bowed his head and pressed his lips against the first scar. Just like he had done with her hand, he moved along its length, stitching up her hurt with his affection.

Tara stiffened at first, her muscles tensing at the feeling of this kind of attention, but then she let go of the breath she was holding back. His lips moved from the left side of her ribs to duck beneath her arm and give the scars he could reach on her back the same treatment. She let him do it. Her head stayed bowed, and she gripped the hem of her shirt, holding it steady against her frame to force herself into this uncomfortable position she knew she could trust. However, she couldn’t stop the tears that continued to fall or the whimpers that slipped out when his kiss would trigger another bad thought.

But her boyfriend never failed to calm her butterflies even if it was only for a moment. As he drew back, he slid his right hand around her back to rub it and continued to do so when he began to kiss the other mark on her lower belly. She breathed in, and he could feel her skin press into his lips. 

She was starting to calm down. She was starting to trust him.

Then, he took his left hand and traced his fingers down her flank to meet the hem of her pants. He pulled one side off her hip.

Panic. Her heartbeat picked up, leading her to slightly squeeze her legs around him. “N-no, Chad—”

Chad blinked up at her. He didn’t move any further. “I won’t do much. Just wanna see…”

Tara hesitated. She felt her formerly injured leg twinge at the way she had it positioned. Then, she relaxed and helped him tug her pants off all the way. Bare against the air conditioning, it was only instinctive that she wanted to pull her legs up to her chest, however his hand eased up her ankle, along her calf, over her knee, and up her thigh. Her eyes never left his, but she dropped her shirt to rest her wrists over his shoulders, rubbing her fingertips against his thoracic vertebrae.

He ran his hand back down, caressing right at her ankle, where it had been snapped by a devil’s wish. 

How that scream had ripped her throat… It was so painful… Tara swore it had been so guttural that, had she not passed out, she would’ve spit up blood on the way to the hospital.

Chad held it in his hand, rubbing it with gentle squeezes in between. And as he gazed at her, he saw her lips start to upturn. Then, her leg flinched, trying to pull away from his hold. He knew why, and it made him smile back at her, relieved that she was no longer anxious and fearful of being exposed to him. “Do you trust me?” he asked this as he glided his hand back up her leg to rest on her hip, bringing himself closer to her.

Carpenter nodded instantly, though her voice was still soft. “Yeah…” She blinked as he wiped stray tears from her cheeks.

Then they joined at the lips, taking a moment to melt into each other’s comfort. But it wasn’t too long, for the congestion that blocked Tara’s airways from crying cut it short. 

Chad grazed his knuckles along Tara’s jawline, watching her eyes close at the touch. “I think you should get some rest for tonight, okay?” 

Her eyelids parted and slowly raised. 

“We can try again tomorrow.”

She nodded with a small sigh. 

Tomorrow was another day…

Another day she’d survive.

───────────────────────────

p.s. i'm sorry this took a while, anon.. i hope you're still around! ♡

- parker (BWS)

[cellard0ors]

For over the last thirty years, Laura has lived in captivity.

Trapped in a glass tank full of water from Lake Septimus, she was shuttled all around from town to town, no one's company to keep save her own.

At first.

But eventually she struck up a kinship with another fellow captive, Silas. Or Silas the dog boy, as Vorez called him.

Eliza Vorez. Their 'mother'. Their owner would be more accurate.

However, she found Silas long before Laura and at least treated him with some semblance of decency. Not much, considering she still expected him to perform at showtime, but he at least got kind words and a gentle attitude.

Laura got the exact opposite. She can only assume it's because, at some point, Vorez thought she would break her. Make her docile and meek. Subservient.

She chose the wrong Mer for that.

It didn't help that Silas was younger and kept so through a perpetual age retention spell - one that kept him trapped at thirteen.

Laura was allowed to go through her First Embarkment and gifted two years after before Vorez struck her with the same spell, coming to the conclusion that it served a two fold purpose. One it kept her attraction young and beautiful. Two, as a punishment.

...Laura wasn't even allowed to naturally age alongside her lost love.

Her lost love - Travis Hackett - the starry-eyed sweet boy who kept her going. The one she grew up with, played with - the one she sacrificed everything for, because she loved him.

She loved him and thinking of him - alive and safe and out in the world, was her only respite from the life she was enduring - not living - enduring.

And now here he is, sneering at her and the only way she can think of to cope with it is to turn it to anger, "Or else what? You'll shoot me? Go ahead. I'm not telling you where my brother is."

"Your brother?" He scoffs and he gets to his feet, peering down at her with disdain, "Well, your 'brother' is responsible for the curse on my family and I'll be damned if I let it continue when I finally have a chance to end this thing!"

"And what do you think I'm here for? The sights?" Laura snaps at him and she does her best to shift around. Her jeans are wildly uncomfortable, her scales having returned and her legs wanting to rejoin to form her tail.

That's not even to mention her patch covered eye socket, which feels like it's bubbling and fizzing, the lake water on her skin, but not where she needs it to heal.

This in mind, she tosses off the patch and while she can hear the sheriff make a sound of disgust at the sight, she ignores him, scooping up handful after handful to splash on her face.

Sure enough, the cool water seeps in and she lets out a sound of sweet relief. There's a slight bit of discomfort as her lost eye returns, but it's worth it once she blinks and realizes her depth perception has returned.

Travis sees her eye is back and gapes at her, "What the hell are you?"

"You said it yourself." she grumbles, "I'm the fish girl..."

"So...a mermaid?"

"We prefer the term Mers." She sighs, "Gender more a human convention..."

"But you said-?!"

"I identify as a girl." Laura explains, "That's my choice."

"Okay..." He says it lightly, in that way where it's clear he's trying to understand and doesn't. It's funny, because it's the exact same response and tone he used when he was ten and asked the exact same thing.

Looking at him now, she can still see bits and pieces of that little boy. She can also see the parts of him she fell in love with during their teens. But he's also different. He looks...tired. Worn. Sad and the sadness kills her, makes her ache, so she speaks to distract herself, "This lake is my home. I was born in its' waters, so they can heal me from pretty much anything."

"Like a lost eye?" He offers and he's managed to fish out the patch she's been using since the last full moon.

Laura eyes it with distaste, "It was an accident. Normally I can be around Silas without fear - my blood is made of these clear waters, so, he tends to avoid me once he's changed, but," she shrugs, "I pushed."

"It shuns clear water..." Travis mummers and she just nods, because clearly he knows more about Silas's condition than she thought. What he knows about her, thanks to her singing, is zip, so she holds up her arms, "If you could, ah - pick me up?"

His expression is cold, stone faced, but she ignores the sting it causes - again, he doesn't know her. Not anymore, "Look, you saw my scales. The water in the lake can turn me back into my natural form. When I'm dry, I have legs just like any other human, so-?"

Travis looks out over the lake and then back at her, his tone full of doubt, "You were down here by the water."

"Yeah, to fix my eye! Not swim away! I would have gotten some water, healed myself, and then been on my way if you hadn't come stomping through!"

"I wasn't-?!"

"Just pick me up, Officer Dick Whippet!"

His jaw sets and he looks furious, but he does as asked. He scoops her up and makes a big show of acting like she's heavy even though she knows that he can more than handle her weight.

...in fact, his arms have gotten very...muscular since last she saw him. Laura can feel the corded strength of them through his police uniform. Swallowing, she feels her face heat and thanks the darkness for covering her blush as he carefully sets her far from the lake.

As she begins to dry, he begins to interrogate, "You say you weren't planning on swimming away, but you refuse to lead me to Silas."

"Uh, yeah. Because you'll probably just kill him." Her tone tells him that he's stupid for thinking she's dumb enough to have thought otherwise.

He sighs and runs his hands over his face, "Look, I don't want to kill the kid. Okay? I just-? I want this nightmare to be over."

Silence settles between them for a moment while Laura patiently waits for him to continue. He does, "When my niece, Kaylee, and my nephew, Caleb, busted your 'brother' out of his cell, he bit one of them. Turned them into a werewolf and they passed it on. So now I've got three infected family members and for the last six years, we've been dealing with all kinds of hell."

"Silas is my brother. You can stop air quoting it." Laura hisses, "You have no idea what he and I went through. No idea. We're bonded by something more than blood and what your family has suffered is nothing more than an eye blink in comparison to the amount of time he and I were trapped with Vorez!"

"Okay, okay, but if that's the case, then why did you two run?!" Travis cries, "When Kaylee and Caleb freed you, you could have-!"

"Could have what?!" Laura interrupts with a bark of laughter, "Gone to you and your family? Yeah, right."

She shakes her head ruefully, "There's only one Hackett I trust, and he didn't show up that night."

Once the words leave her mouth, she realizes the mistake she made. It was said in the heat of the moment and her eyes widen at the ramifications of what she just admitted.

Travis, for his part, seems - thankfully - confused, "The only-? Which Hackett? What are you talking about?"

"Nothing. Nothing." She waves her hands, "Let's just-? Just drop it."

She wishes her legs were dry enough that she could stand. If life were perfect, if it was as well timed as music or a scene in a film, they would be. But this is real life, so it leaves her in this well of awkwardness as the minutes pass and Travis, obviously, works over what she said.

And while he might have been confused initially, it doesn't take him long to figure it out. No, of course not. He's the sheriff for a reason. He's capable of solving a puzzle when need be and his eyebrows rise, face a mask of shock as he says, "Wait...that night..."

Laura gulps.

"The night of Harum Scarum...the tickets were addressed to me."

She feels her bottom lip tremble, feels herself looking away from him, eyes heating with unshed tears as he rises to tower over her and growls, "You sent the tickets to me. Why?"

She starts shaking her head and he reaches down and grabs her arms, shakes her roughly, "Why? Who in the hell are you?!"

"I'm-? I told you. I'm nobody. Just some fish girl, just some-!"

"Oh, don't give me that horseshit! You sent me the tickets! You're responsible for all of this! Who ARE you?!"

"Laura!" she cries out sharply, "Alright?! My name..."

She sucks in a shaky breath, "My name is Laura..."

[huntinglove]

Hoi!

💕 Where is your favorite place to kiss on your FO’s body? Where is their favorite place to kiss you?

🥰 How often do you kiss? Do you kiss frequently or sparingly? Do you always kiss each other goodnight?

😽 Tell about a kiss with a funny story behind it!

For any of the mains you're currently focused on? ^^

-@redwingedwolves

Hi hi!! Thank you so much for the ask!! I'll answer these for Charlie, Simon and Shaun!!

💕 Where is your favorite place to kiss on your FO’s body? Where is their favorite place to kiss you?

Charlie loves kissing my lips, hands, cheeks and neck the most! He's very gentle and delicate when it comes to kissing me, it always feels soft and safe, like a little piece of heaven with a cherry on top!!

I love kissing his lips, hands and chest, especially his scar! He always gets very flustered whenever I kiss him, and for his dismay I love calling him my pretty boy whenever I kiss him hehe! To me all of him is beautiful and deserves all the adoration he could possibly get.

Simon likes to kiss my forehead, jaw and cheeks the most! He always gives me a kiss whenever he wants to show that he's proud of me or that he's just happy to have me around, so his kisses feel warm and cozy like a brand new blanket!

I like to kiss his nose, lips and hands! He works so hard and kissing him is a way to get him to take a break and relax every now and then! He always looks up at me with a melty smile whenever I give him sudden kisses!

Shaun loves kissing my tummy, cheeks and neck! He really likes how soft and warm I feel whenever he kisses me, plus he has a lot of fun tickling me as well... I forgive him though, especially because his kisses feel like genuine joy and happiness!!

I love kissing his forehead, lips and arms! Getting to gently move his hair so I can kiss his face always makes him stutter over his words, same with pushing the fishnet gloves down hehe~ It's fun to get him all flustered and speechless, plus it makes him even warmer and better to kiss!

🥰 How often do you kiss? Do you kiss frequently or sparingly? Do you always kiss each other goodnight?

Charlie has a hard time initiating any physical affection, especially because he doesn't want to be overwhelming or imposing, so I usually kiss him first! When he understands that I'm fine with kissing, he asks or goes for it almost all the time. From tiny kisses on the back of my hands to deep and desperate kisses when we're on our own, we kiss almost constantly!

Simon has gotten so used to greeting and generally communicating with kisses that he does it almost absentmindedly! Sometimes he'll even kiss me after we've argued, then get grumpy at himself for forgetting that he was supposed to be mad at me! It's genuinely adorable

Shaun is usually busy with college work and recording his movies, so we don't spend that much time together in the first place, but when we do we definitely make up for lost time! He likes to have me sit on his lap so he can kiss me for a good ten minutes at a time!

😽 Tell about a kiss with a funny story behind it!

Charlie always falls for the "you've got something on your lip" trick.. Plus his reaction to being kissed so suddenly is as adorable as it is hilarious~ Watching him smile and blush while just pretending to be upset about me pranking him makes my heart melt every time

Simon's brain kind of shuts down after we kiss for a long time and he ends up saying really silly stuff, it's really endearing!! One time, after we had been kissing for a while he kept fidgeting with his glasses and adjusting his tie while saying a bunch of sappy pick up lines

Shaun has tried all sorts of crazy and silly kisses before, one time he had the brilliant idea to try and hang off our closet so we could have a spiderman kiss. Apparently, his legs gave out during the kiss because he just fell a few seconds after we started kissing. Once I made sure he was okay we both broke down laughing about the whole scene

[the-hilda-librarians-wife]

Fireflies Over The Wall - Chapter 8

Relationship: The Bell Keeper & Meiri (Original character)

Summary: "The troll brought with herself, every night without a fault, a baby.

Every night, she placed it upon the grass, and pointed upwards, showing her baby the stars and constellations. Showing her baby the fireflies.

Holding it tight. Cuddling with it. Making sure it saw the beauty the world had to offer. He had never considered himself a sentimental man. Yet this image, for some reason, never failed to make him return home feeling something gaping and void inside of himself.

Every one of his former coworkers must have returned to their families.

Who would Edmund return to when he could work no more?

What would give him a reason to get out of bed when the fireflies were no longer enough?"

An OC's origin story as well as a Bell Keeper character study, because this character is much more fascinating than I'd been giving him credit for.

Notes: Title from 'mirrorball', by Taylor Swift

Chapter title: When I break, it's in a million pieces

Read it on ao3

He waited a while, figuring that if Meiri wasn’t in the best headspace (which he truly doubted, given the manner in which she left his house) she might not head to orphanage right away. But after roughly an hour, during which he didn’t have the energy to do anything other than finishing washing his clothes and leaving them out to dry, Edmund dragged himself to the cabin’s telephone and rang Terry’s personal number.

“Hello!” The man greeted, and this time Edmund couldn’t hold back a groan. Being met with cheerfulness when he felt this awful about himself felt similar to being awoken with a flashlight to your face in the middle of the night. “Is everything alright?”

He rubbed the spot between his brows. “Yeah. Yeah, I guess so. Just wanted to know if Meiri had arrived safely, she was very out of sorts when she left here earlier.”

A beat of silence was time enough for his stomach to drop. “Meiri hasn’t arrived yet. Not to my knowledge, at least.”

“But she’s been gone for over an hour.” The hand that had been on his forehead now ran through his hair. “It’s been more than enough time for her to arrive.”

Terry cleared his throat with the obvious impression that Edmund was blowing things out of proportion. “Well, she might be playing outside still. Or at the library. The sun is only going down now, so she still has a couple more minutes to arrive.”

“No, I’m serious. She ran away. Actually ran. It’s not safe for her to be out and about in the state she was in.”

Holding the phone between his ear and shoulder, Edmund was already reaching out for his coat. Meiri could be anywhere. She could not be aware of the time. Whatever he’d done to her, clearly she hadn’t been in any condition to be wandering around on her own. He was still of the opinion that she was too young to be doing that, anyway, but they wouldn’t be in this situation if he had kept acting on his philosophy that it was none of his business what the girl got to.

“And what state was she in, if I may ask?”

Little shit. He sounded like he knew exactly what he was talking about. He just wanted to hear him say it. Edmund sighed.

“I think I scared her.” He admitted in a regretful voice. Terry responded with a matching sigh, though his sounded way more tired than worried.

“We’ll wait until her curfew is over, then we’ll begin searching. Don’t worry, Edmund. It wasn’t your fault.”

The words were meant to comfort him, but they only pissed him off. Edmund put the phone back in its hook and passed his second arm through the thick sleeve of the yellow jacket, checking that he had his keys in his pockets and his shoes were tied. They had no way of knowing if it hadn’t been his fault. He had no way of knowing if it hadn’t been his fault. But it would be if Meiri got hurt because she was walking around while having a meltdown. Edmund left his cabin lights on and his door opened, figuring that maybe she’d feel free to go inside if she was around and showed up while he was looking for her, and set off into his search.

…......

He’d searched the woods that circled the wall for an hour. Then he’d gone to St. Anne’s and talked to a (now getting worried) Terry, who had also been making calls to know where he wouldn’t even need to look. Edmund asked to borrow their phone for an instant, dialling the only number he knew by heart.

Kaisa picked up after four rings; in moments like these, it was a blessing that she was the only librarian in that mausoleum. Not that there had really been any moments like these before.

Meiri wasn’t in the library either, but Kaisa picked up on his obvious distress and told him to come by, since she thought she could help. He took off running through the streets, after Terry promised he and one of the other caretakers who were on duty that evening would comb through the orphanage’s neighbourhood.

When he arrived at the library, which was dark and silent now that working hours had already been long over, Kaisa ran up to him with a spell book at hand.

“This will help trace back to her if you cast it over something she owns.” She said, pointing to the glyphs he wasn’t remotely close to understanding. “It’s simple enough that I should be able to cast it.”

“Okay.” He nodded while his heart hammered inside his chest. Her roommates must be asleep already. “There’s some snacks I bought her in my house, but I’m not sure that counts as hers. She brought a library book today. Would that work?”

Kaisa thought for a while, looking like she thought the right answer was ‘no’ but she didn’t want to tell him that.

“I suppose that since she borrowed it, it’s technically her property for a while.” She risked a guess. “Let’s go try it.”

The witch wasn’t confident enough to try any transportation spells, not even a speed one. But she was able to call them a taxi since her friend seemed to be too worried to even think about the possibility. Their driver seemed to pick up on his sense of urgency and arrived at the road end closest to his home in fifteen minutes, a new record, and the two of them ran together to his house.

Well, not together together, since someone was apparently not working on her cardio, but Kaisa was trying, he’d give her that. And she didn’t currently feel as if a syringe full of adrenaline had been injected directly inside of her veins.

His panic only escalated the more time passed.

Even though seeing Kaisa perform magic was a rare opportunity, he couldn’t even appreciate it, too anxious about what the result would be to appreciate the fact that hey, I’m really friends with a witch, biting the inside of his cheek all the while she cast.

“Did it work?” He asked anxiously as soon as she stopped speaking. Kaisa nodded.

“There’s a trail pointing to the owner, but only the caster can see it. Come on, let’s follow it.”

He only had Kaisa’s word to go for it, but she seemed to be very clearly following directions, so he decided that running after her was a risk worth taking. For a long while, they just made their way back to the city centre, which meant that it took them long, painful minutes of running until they could be sure that they weren’t being led back to the library or, who knew, the townhall. He wasn’t sure who even really owned library books, truth be told. But they kept running and running, until they had no energy left in them and were essentially dragging themselves in a hurry through the streets. It would have been a picture worthy moment, great blackmailing material for future instances to capture the way Kaisa looked at that moment; for obvious reasons, he wasn’t in that headspace at the moment.

Eventually the path began to make sense to Edmund, who remembered very clearly the last time he’d walked through those streets in specific.

“Is it-” He had to take a deep breath, sweat dripping down the back of his neck even though the night was cold. “Is it pointing to the abandoned bell tower?”

Bless her soul, Kaisa sounded even worse than he did. “Why is there… a bell tower... smack in the middle of the city?”

“Is it?”

“I think so! I don’t know!”

With energy that he must have borrowed from whatever gods were looking after him at that moment, Edmund began running towards the old entrance, two blocks away, hearing Kaisa scream after him while lacking the actual capacity to pick up her pace. It was no matter; she’d already helped him more than he could ever repay her for.

Trolberg wasn’t a very busy city at night, which was lucky since almost no one saw him flying through the streets like a madman. His skeleton key was at the ready to make quick work of the lock, but the door opened with nothing other than turning the knob, which raised him the question of how Meiri had gotten inside in the first place.

Suddenly it made a lot of sense that the people at Saint Anne’s had given up on trying to stop her from running around whenever she felt like it.

The spiralling staircase would have felt impossible to overcome under any other circumstances, but he was so close that being tired didn’t hold him back anymore. The trapdoor on top of the ladder was ajar; he’d finally found her.

After poking his head through the opening, he very easily spotted the girl, curled up into a ball on the part of the floor that had the least amount of bat filth. Her head rested on her bent knees, her shins being hugged tightly and her backpack between her thighs and torso. She couldn’t see him. Yet she heard it when he arrived and tensed up.

Edmund lifted himself up into the tower with as little noise as he could, keeping his steps light as he approached her delicately. He sat down close enough that she’d be able to hear him, but kept some space between themselves.

“Hey, kid.” He said softly, which was hard considering he was still panting from the exertion. “Can I talk?”

She doesn’t answer; but she’d never had any trouble in telling him ‘no’ before, so he takes it as a green sign, hoping he’d recognize it if it turned yellow or red.

“I’m sorry.” His voice was sincere. He did regret it deeply. He regretted that he had caused this. That he hadn’t sensed that he shouldn’t have asked. That he didn’t wait longer, though he didn’t know if that would have made a difference. He just couldn’t bring himself to feel sorry that he had asked, but she didn’t need to know that. “I never meant to cause you any distress, kid. Really. You’re a very good girl and I… I apologise for causing this.”

He sighed, saying to hell with it and leaning back against what remained of the stone wall no matter how dirty it was. He’d definitely need to do more laundry when he arrived back home. It was beginning to dawn on him that he should probably warn someone that he had found her, when she finally spoke.

“You didn’t do anything wrong.”

Her voice was muffled by her position, but he still heard her well enough.

“Whatever I did, it made you uncomfortable. That’s reason enough to apologise.”

She lifted her head. Her eyes were puffy, clear tear paths still visible. She stared straight forward, not sparing him a glance.

“You can’t adopt me. I don’t want to lose you.”

She said it like stating a fact. Something inevitable. Something so obvious that she had already accepted it, making clear with her voice that he should too.

“That’s okay.” Edmund measured his words, not looking at her despite how much he wanted to on the grounds that it might make it harder for her to do this. He wished his heart would cooperate right now. It had finally slowed down but now it had decided to ache, stupid thing. “I don’t want you to feel like you need to accept it if you still want to be my friend and come around. You’ll always be welcome.”

He ran a hand through his hair, wet with sweat that was making him chilly now that he had stopped moving. “I’m only afraid that this… you spending so much time around me, I mean. That it may be affecting you in a bad way. But I would never put a condition for you to be around.”

“You don’t GET IT!” The sudden outburst was so jarring that Edmund jumped, the sound that resonated in the tower so strong that a couple of bats flew away. He thought he saw a rat running from one piece of fallen wood to another, further from where the girl was, now staring at him. “You’ll hate me. You’ll see me, and you will hate me.”

Her voice began to crack, near tears forming in her eyes as she lowered her gaze to the filthy floor. “It’s what they did.”

The crying now restarted at full force. Edmund would have felt less distressed about it if it were a full blown sobbing. Instead, she had the silent cry of someone who’d learned how to hide it. He had no idea of what to do as she resumed her previous curled up position. He’d tried asking, ever so gently, who ‘they’ were, but either she didn't hear him over her quiet gasps or she pretended not to. When the crying eventually ceased, he recognized by the rise and fall of her back that she’d fallen asleep.

Which added up considering she was six and the sun was beginning to peak through the half fallen ceiling of the bell tower. They’d been looking for her all night.

Bone deep weary in a way that made him feel decades older than he really was, Edmund very carefully manoeuvred her into his arms, the prayers he’d been sending upwards the entire night finally being heard judging by how she surprisingly didn’t wake up as he did so. Poor creature must have really been exhausted.

Climbing down the ladder with his arms full proved to be tricky, but he had the advantage of being as familiar with bell towers as one could be, and once he managed to reach the staircase it was easy work. Looking down, he saw that not only Kaisa was sitting at the base, but also Terry and another caretaker he hadn’t met before. Their faces were tired from the physical and emotional labour of the night, but there was no small amount of relief in them when they noticed him coming down with the child in his arms.

Kaisa must have somehow contacted them to make them aware of their whereabouts, and though he didn’t know how she could have possibly done so, the most improbable part of it all was that she’d apparently convinced them to wait out until Edmund came back down instead of going to get her right away. He would have to find a way to express his gratitude when this was all over.

The trio had been sitting down, probably having waited longer than Edmund had realised, but stood up as soon as he reached the lower steps. He’d been expected to be yelled at; frankly, it wouldn’t have been underserved. He was probably making these people’s jobs so much harder than it ought to be. Instead, Terry just kept a sombre face as he raised his arms to take Meiri from him.

He missed the weight instantly.

“Thank you, sir.” He said, not coldly, but sounding like he’d been up all night sick with worry. Which he had. “I think it’s best if you don’t see each other again.”

The statement was a knife to his chest. Edmund only barely had the presence of mind to not visibly flinch as turned kept his gaze down, avoiding the bundle on the blond man’s arms. He nodded, his throat feeling unusually tight. It was all the permission the caretakers needed to turn on their heels and head back to Saint Anne’s, taking away from him one of the only things he’d ever been sure he wanted in his life.

[scheodingers-muppet]

Welcome back to "Jace has Stranger Things and Taylor Swift brainrot." On today's episode: Red. I'm going kinda out of order, but I honestly think I'll end up doing every album so if you want to see a specific album, let me know

State of Grace: Steddie. "I never saw you coming" "You were never a saint, and I've loved in shades of wrong" They both can be mean and tough, but they were so soft around each other almost immediately

Red: Stancy, from Steve's POV. The relationship was honestly toxic, but it was filled with adrenaline and most likely Steve's first real love. Losing her was hard, since he loved her so strongly. I'm also a "Steve's emotions are too big for his body" person so I might be projecting

Treacherous: Lumax. Max grew up without a strong sense of what a healthy relationship should look like. Her stepdad sucked and was likely awful to her Mom. She's scared of what love and letting people in her bubble mean. Then you add the fact Billy straight up told her to avoid Lucas but she couldn't resist. Then Lucas warning her that getting involved with him could be dangerous. It's not safe on paper, but she loves him

I Knew You Were Trouble: Stancy, from Steve's side. I promise not all the breakup songs will be Stancy. But the line "the saddest fear comes creeping in that you never loved me, or her, or anyone" paired with the fight, her inability to tell Steve she loves him, the strain with Jonathan in season 4. It just fits so well

All Too Well: Mike and El. "Any time now, he's gonna say it's love. You never called it what it was, til we were dead and gone and buried, checked the pulse and come back swearing it's the same." "You kept me like a secret but I kept you like an oath" and Mike literally keeping her a secret at first. "I'm a crumbled up piece of paper" as an analogy to the letters. "Maybe we got lost in translation" and El feeling like she isn't even the same species as Mike. "The idea you had of me, who was she? A never-needy ever, lovely jewel whose shine reflects on you" Need I continue?

22: Season 3 Elmax at the mall. Just being teenage girls, the way they deserve. Also, imagine them having a sleepover, dancing around screaming this song while Hopper's at work one night. Adorable

I Almost Do: Jopper. I think the idea that Joyce waited for Hopper, for him to mature or whatever it was, and finally had to stop waiting. It tore them both apart, but I think Joyce would have had a similar reaction to this song; through Lonnie (or however you spell his name), Bob. Everything

We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together: Lumax. My on-again-off-again OTP. Another big slumber party song. They will get back together though, let's be honest

Stay Stay Stay: Platonic Stobbin. I just know Robin would be horrible in an actual fight, she'd get so ready for someone to leave and just snap at them. Steve would try to make her laugh once they sit down to talk it out to relieve the tension. In Steve's eyes, everyone he loves leaves, but Robin stays

The Last Time: Byler. Will has had to beg Mike to give him some attention lately, like in season 4 with the letter fight. "The is the last time I'm asking you this, put my name at the top of your list" "You break my heart in the blink of an eye" "This is the last time I say it's been you all along"

Holy Ground: Platonic Stancy. Like, they've both moved on and have each other as friends in their lives. I love the idea of Steddie and Ronance, with Steve and Nancy dancing together at their weddings

Sad Beautiful Tragic: Jancy. They only started hanging out because of tragedies. Their relationship has only existed because of horrible things, but they found beauty in it. "Distance, timing, breakdown, fighting" and "Could you just try to listen?" with the fight in season 3 and them living on opposite sides of the country in season 4.

The Lucky One: Steve. "You had it figured out since you were in school, everybody loves pretty, everybody loves cool" Everyone is quick to tell him he's got it good since he has a rich family and was Mr. Popular, but he's lonely. "Your lover in the foyer doesn't even know you." "You don't feel pretty, you just feel used" "You wonder if you'll make it out alive"

Everything Has Changed: Lumax!! "All I've seen since 18 hours ago is green eyes, and freckles and your smile in the back of my mind" "All I know is a simple name and everything as changed" from Lucas's pov. "All my walls stood tall, painted blue but I'll take 'em down and open up the door for you" "All I know is a new found grace. All my days, I'll know your face" from Max

Starlight: Robin. I think Robin would love space and the stars. We know she loves music, and I think she'd like to dance too. Also the line "worrying so much about things you can't change. You'll spend your whole life singing the blues if you keep thinking that way" fits her so well. And the line "He's talking crazy, dancing with me. We could get married, have ten kids and teach them how to dream" reads to me as Robin playfully joking about Steve's old crush on her, and I think the two of them would totally hang out on Robin's prom night, but Steve would still make her dance because everyone deserves an awkward prom slow dance

Begin Again: Max, not necessarily about a relationship though. This song makes me think of Max's damaged relationship with men and the party helping her heal that. Billy was abusive, her stepdad sucked. We see Steve be that protective figure where Billy was the opposite. Hopper would totally also take her under his wing and show her what a father figure should be. The boys in the party treat her as an equal. They think she's fierce and funny and beautiful, but they treat her as a person too. She's not used to that; the men in her life haven't been good to her. But they're showing her how worthy she is

The Moment I Knew: Byler. I love Mike, but he's severely dropped the ball for Will. Will was so excited to see him in season 4, but he's hardly paying attention to him before everything happens. Add the fact that season 4 should have been over Will's birthday

Come Back... Be Here: Steddie. "I told myself don't get attached." "I don't want to miss you like this" "If I had known what I'd known now, I never would've played so nonchalant" "I can't help but wish you took me with you" "This is falling in love in the cruelest way" "This is falling for you and you are worlds away"

Girl At Home: Honestly, Murray. Why? I Don't know. But it's him.

Ronan: Hopper (I'm sorry) I think we often forget he lost his daughter, and not only that, he blames himself. The little memories we see show how much he loved her.

Better Man: Max about Billy. She wanted to love him but he was so horrible to her and we see in season 4 how she does miss him. "Talking down to me like I'd always be around, push my love away like it was some kind of loaded gun" "I wish it wasn't 4 am standing in the mirror saying 'you know you had to it' I know the bravest thing I ever did was wrong"

Nothing New: Nancy. "Girls go out and have your fun' then they hunt and slay the ones who actually do it" Nancy tried to be a teenage girl and lost her best friend, blames herself for it, got slutshammed to the whole town, and became a monster hunter. She deals with the most sexism, both from other characters and the fandom. "what will become of me once I lost my novelty" "how can a person know everything at 18 and nothing at 22?" "She'll know the way and then she'll say she got the map from me" about Holly or Erica, and feeling so conflicted because these girls look up to her but she feels like a mess who shouldn't be a goal to reach. Especially for Erica, since she got roped into the Upside Down stuff so young.

The other vault songs don't really match in my opinion, so this is all for today

[seokmn]

chapter XXV : what are we?

wc: 1.1k words

you cleared your throat awkwardly, “you know… they just like to talk about anything that comes to their minds”

seokmin just nodded and kept cooking the ramen for you two. there was a lot in his mind now, were you two already dating? were you two a fling? a situationship? his thoughts were killing him.

“yn?”, he called you out and you hummed in response, seokmin turned to look at you, he tried to hide his anxiety and nervousness in his voice, but his expression said otherwise, “what are we?”

“i… i dont know. we’re friends…?”, seokmin chuckled bitterly when he heard your answer to his question, he wouldn’t deny, your answer hurt him, “come on, i think we’re more than that”

you felt a pang in your heart, you knew you like him, no, you knew you love him so why did you say friends? why were you so afraid of getting official with him?

“then what are we, seokmin?”

seokmin pursed his lips, turned off the oven and walked towards you, who were sat on the couch, “in my opinion, you and me are not that complicated and it’s clearly not that hard to understand what we feel for each other and…”, he ran his fingers through his hair while looking away for a moment before looking back at you with a frustrated expression, “who between us will dare to say that its impossible for this love to happen? if i recall, you were the one who said that you think we can date people even if we dont have a soulmate, but the relationship wont last forever and i get it, you made me think the same. before i know you i thought id have to be single forever.”

“seok-“ before you could even finish saying his name, he cut you off.

“and i know you said you dont do relationships, i understand and i respect that, even tho it might not look like right now. but i know youre afraid of the end, you dont want to get involved with someone because youre already thinking about the end of the relationship because the person is not the one and trust me, im scared of that too. im scared of trying something and end up getting hurt, but im more scared of not trying it out with you and regret about being a coward for the rest of my life.”

you just fell silent, looking at him while listening to his words. the sight of his eyes tearing up breaking your heart in pieces, all you wanted to do was to keep him close to you, to keep him safe in your arms.

“after all we said to each other.. after all we did together,” he scoffed, “its no longer appropriate for us to be just friends, dont you think?”

“seokmin, i know you have feelings for me and i have feelings for you as well.. but it’ll hurt too much when this comes to an end. for gods sake i think i love you, i cant bring myself to do this to you and to myself.. i know that ill never be capable of love after you”

he was no longer holding back his tears, they were running down his face while he looked at you with such sadness in his eyes, “if you love me, why cant you give me a chance? why cant you give us a chance?”

“because loving is scary!”

“dont you think i know that?! you know me too well to know what i think about not having a freaking string with someone and yet my feelings for you are so strong that i created the courage to try it out with you, to say ‘fuck you’ to the destiny and be with you. if you think that giving in to love is that scary, then let me show you how my love can be beautiful and not scary at all. yn, all i want is you”

seokmin cupped your face and kissed you, desperately trying to show you all of his love for you in that kiss while tears continued to fall from his face and soon enough from yours too.

once the kiss was broken he rested his forehead against yours and spoke with a shaky voice, “i swear ill make it work, we wont grow apart. only death will separate us, actually, ill even fight death just to stay with you a little longer. ill go anywhere you go, if you end up falling out of love ill try to win you over again and again. i promise you ill never give up on you.”

“i dont think i could never fall out of love with you…”

“then be mine and let me be yours… please… we can try it out, we can make this happen. ill fight for you, ill fight for us”

you couldnt bring yourself to say something. you wanted to kiss him again, to tell him you do want to be with him, but you were so scared. it was funny and ironic that you felt that way, he usually was the scaredy cat about all this non-string stuff so why was he the brave one and you the scaredy cat at that moment? you two were already kind of acting like a couple, why were you so scared of making it official?

seokmin continued to look at you with his red eyes, still tearing up and holding your hand firmly, but gently.

“please… im only trying because i know about your feelings towards me and you are worth it”, he brought your hand to his cheek and closed his eyes, letting the small tears flow down his face once again. seeing that made your heart ache even more, you rubbed your thumb against his cheek while you watched him, still in deep thoughts about this whole situation.

fuck it, yn. you love him and he loves you. you deserve to be happy, you deserve to have a romance with the guy you love. dont think about it too much, you must live life fully.

you gave him a small smile, still caressing his cheek with your thumb as he leaned into your touch, “lets say ‘fuck you’ to the destiny and be together”, you said softly and he looked at you with puppy eyes, closing the distance between you two by kissing you and then breaking the kiss just to pepper you with pecks all over your face, “i swear we’ll be the happiest couple ever. ill make you the happiest girl, make you look at our hands and swear you saw the string”

“i know you will… but i have to tell you, im really scared, seokmin”

“trust me, i am too.. but we can do this together, alright? lets focus on having fun and loving each other, lets forget that this whole soulmate shit exists. we can make our own destiny. i promise ill be good to you”

"i know you will.. i trust you. we're gonna try it out, gonna do this together"

lua’s note: help i feel like i cant write angst This life is not for me 👊💔

prev - next

INVISIBLE STRING

in a world where when you turn 18 you share an invisible string with your soulmate that only you and your respective soulmate can see it, seokmin, also known as dokyeom, is an actor in the musical theatre world that doesnt have a soulmate and keep it as a secret. meanwhile, yn works in a bookstore and doesnt seem bothered at all by the fact of not sharing a string with someone. is it possible to change the destiny and find your soulmate even tho you dont share the invisible string with anyone?

[casspurrjoybell-30]

Howling Love - Chapter 28

*Warning Adult Content*

Camryn Summer.

"Amille," I growled out as the doors to the art studio fell to the floor after I banged them open.

"Camryn Summer control yourself," the art teacher yelled as my frantic eyes couldn't find him, he wasn't there.

All the doors on the floor were being banged open by my friends and the lacrosse team, why because I couldn't feel my mate.

I couldn't find him, the last time I did, I felt as if I was being dunked in wolfsbane then nothing.

So I quickly raced off to find him, they all rallied to follow me, his cousins were both beyond frantic but all the ruckus was white noise as I tried to find him.

Correct... it was a pin prick.

He was alive but why our connection was so weak alarmed me.

"He's not here Alpha," one of the wolves on the team muttered and I growled feeling useless.

Yet again I couldn't keep my mate safe.

He was the most precious thing to me but I couldn't keep him safe.

I barely knew where he was.

"Help the caretaker fix the door, replace it whatever, when you're done, find me," I order the wolf who nods stiffly.

I turned on my heel headed for the stairs, down to the ground floor where his locker was, Teja and Orlando were there and had created a perimeter for other students not to contaminate the area.

"Anything?" I asked Teja and he nodded.

"It's extremely faint but it's there, here its his lunch bag, take it's scent and focus," he told me and I let Rha-Es take over.

I was going out of my mind at this point and my wolf was more primal, he was the better of us two at this point.

I felt and watched him examine the bag, then caught the scent, it appeared as a thread, then another one, it was familiar, too familiar, another scent appeared, this one made even Rha-Es growl.

"Follow," my wolf ordered as we took off toward the main doors of the school, past them, at full sprint we were by the main doors in seconds, then we stopped.

Rha-Es sniffed the air again and I was almost in tears with my anger.

"It can't be... Maxine?" I whispered capturing their attention.

"What about Maxine Alpha? No one can find her since her last class after lunch," Teja desperately mentioned as my wolf and I switched places and he didn't say anything but rather his strong will was placed in me because a part of what had happened.

I knew now and it had my ex at the centre.

"Someone took them," Orlando finally spoke and I nodded.

"It's not just someone, it was Vincent," I whispered back and both their eyes hardened.

When I had Vincent in my grasp I would rip him apart piece by piece for even daring to touch my mate and Maxine, they were both beautiful souls and deserved nothing of what was being done to them.

"Come we hunt, gather the others," I ordered my Beta who nodded as I tossed my car keys to Teaj.

"Take my car, drive straight to your dad, inform him of what happened, he should be able to keep Amille's dad under control as he's told. Amille is his everything and him being kidnapped by my ex is the last thing he needs to be experiencing right now," I explained to Teja who nodded as the team gathered and we made our way into the woods.

I tore off my clothes and used a stretcher cable that I kept close to tie them to my leg.

Afterwards I shifted and a howl tore out from my jaws, a call, a call to my love.

I would howl and he would hear, I would die if I didn't find him and I would find him so we thundered into the woods at back break speed headed towards Vincent's home.

I needed something solid to track him with and learn more about his activities lately, he couldn't have kidnapped my mate by chance or Maxine, this was long in the planning.

So we pressed forward deep into my territory, I was master of the land now. I was it's Alpha.

"Take a team go to Maxine's house, make sure her parents are safe, leave a guard detail and find any information you can to track her," I ordered my beta who nodded, howled a bit and took off in another direction leaving me with five other wolves.

It didn't take time to get to Vincent's house and the moment we got close Rha-es grolwed, the stench of wolfsbane surrounded his house that it burned to breathe but also another scent, a rogue scent, it was too pungent not to miss, that was the thing with rogues.

They could be as clean as a whistle but the the scent on their bodies change when they are cast out especially when their wolves become more feral, as for other rogues with clear minds the scent is different not pungent at all.

'Everyone stop here, I'll go alone,' I called out to the five wolves.

'Respectfully Alpha, I won't let you go in there alone,' Finn one of my mate's acquaintances stated,

I could see the guilt in his eyes, the hurt, he missed my mate, they hadn't known him but they were devoted to him.

So I nodded as I covered my nose with my hand and walked to the front door.

The burn of wolfsbane was less at the front, I wondered how Vincent had even kept it a secret or the rogue in his house.

I raised my foot and kicked the door out of the way, it clattered away in pieces as a wolf stood up in alarm.

Finn didn't waste time lunging and tackling him down to the dining room floor, everything seemed to be in shambles, I wondered where Vincent's aunts were in all this mess.

'Speak,' Finn growled as he applied pressure to the rogue's neck who choked yet laughed.

'He knew you would come Alpha, he knew the first place you would come is here,' the rogue chuckled as I moved from near the door and to him, in one swift motion I raised my foot and set it straight on his leg in full force.

'No, ah,' he wailed.

'Fuck,' he cried out.

'You crushed my leg you neanderthal,' he cried out angrily, hearing him say that, what only my mate called me and knowing he knew where he had taken him, gave me rage.

So in an unnatural speed my hand went through his chest and right for his heart.

'You have a few minutes to live, I suggest you conserve those by telling me everything you know and by ignoring the current blood loss you're experiencing because of the leg I ripped off,' I told him with what I knew was a terrifying, fang filled grin that even made Finn flinch, so the rogue nodded eyes filled with tears.

'Vincent planned for months, he wanted you, he wanted this pack but when he couldn't get that, it made him nuts, we had always been friends since he liked playing on the dark side, it's how my mates and I knew him, he said he would get us to be part of a pack if we helped him.'

He coughed out blood, my hand still in his chest.

'Where did he take them?' I questioned.

'The old Bridgeton barracks, he said no one would look there since there were so many hidden bunkers but he's not in there, he went past them into the secret tunnel, there's a hidden bunker there, no other structures,' he explained as the light dimmed in his eyes.

'How many of your friends are there?' I demanded.

'Eight excluding me, you should know, he plans to kill you if he can't kill your mate, with the poison your mother used on your mate's father, it's no coincidence, we gave it to her.' he choked on more blood as his smile faltered, his last words made me bitter and angry, how could they do that to any one.

'Why take him, why take Amille?' Finn questioned.

'Don't you get it loyal warrior, to get the Alpha, you take the Luna but Vincent also took him for other purposes, after all blue blood is rare," the answer he gave made me feel a deep seated worry come to life.

Vincent had indeed been tracking my mate more so than I thought.

'Who else knows he's a blue blood?' I demanded.

'Just my mate and Vincent,' he whispered.

'Good,' I nodded to Finn and in one swift motion I tore out his heart, nine left.

'Alpha,' Finn began but my hiss made him silent as we walked out of the house.

'Burn it down,' I ordered the four other wolves who didn't hesitate to do my bidding.

I walked into the woods again, Finn a distance away from me as the house was up in flames.

I breathed in deep as the wind nipped at my skin but did nothing to soothe my anger.

'Alpha, uncle Calvin put a tracker in Amille's bracelet a long time ago, he didn't get into why but it pinned him in the old barracks,' Teja informed through the link.

'I know where they are, Teja. We're headed that way but don't make a move, Vincent is more dangerous than he's ever been., I projected.

'Alpha, what do you mean?' Tej's father questioned.

'The poison my mother used, she got it from rogues that are with Vincent and there are eight of them, we need to be careful,' I explained as a hum came through in response but nothing else.

So I shifted allowing my wolf to take more control.

I could feel it burn through my body, sheer will.

'Alpha,' Finn whispered as he fell to one knee and Rha-Es let out a howl.

It was different than before.

This was a call, to my Beta, to my warriors and to my love.

I knew he would hear it, I was coming for him.

[ophelia-jones]

Thorns pt 7

Dwight led Carl to a small white pickup truck and shoved him into the cab. He got behind the drivers seat and started the engine, waiting for Negan and Lacey.

"Looks like you're gonna have to sit on Daddy's lap." Negan told Lacey with one of his shit-eating grins. He used to charm her when he smiled but now? She shivered slightly, it was like a wolf showing her his teeth. She was about to be his dinner.

Lacey obliged because she had no choice in the matter. She kept her eyes forward and her mouth silent as they began to move.

"Carl, do you have a girlfriend, young man?" Negan asked and Carl shot a disgusted look at the man. He shook his head slightly and kept quiet, too.

"Well, let ol' Negan give you a piece of advice. See, the way I see it a relationship between a man and a woman is not a lot different from any other partnership. Each person wants something from the other, and that is exactly what I have with my wives back at Sanctuary. They are beautiful young women and all I want from them is their… company." Negan said, pausing to moan a little in Lacey's ear when the truck hit a rough patch that sent her bouncing up and down on his lap. She continued to ignore him outwardly. 

"They, in turn, want me to protect them, keep them safe, give them a comfortable life. And I do. Easy peasy lemon squeezey, right? Everybody knows the deal and everybody gets what they want." Negan checked to be sure Carl was listening, reaching across him to punch Dwight on the shoulder.

"Now as Dwight here can testify to, the problems start when you confuse a give and take relationship by making it all emotional.  People do stupid things when they are emotional. Feelings cause all sorts of trouble, and you know who always gets their asses kicked when they develop all these 'feelings'?" Negan continued, making air quotes with his fingers when he said feelings.  "The man."

"You're so full of shit." Lacey snapped.

"Oh-ho! There she is! That's my Lacey, right there. I was afraid for a minute something had managed to break that spirit!" He said gleefully, grabbing her shoulder and giving her a happy shake, as if he genuinely was glad to see her.

"See, Carl, when a woman tells you 'I don't need anything from you, I just want to spend time together. You're so handsome, Carl. You're so smart, Carl. I think I'm falling in love with you, Carl! Run." Negan mocked a woman's high pitched voice as he spoke. Lacey turned to face Negan this time, her green eyes meeting his watery brown puppy dog eyes.

"You talk out of your ass so much, if I lit a match right now this truck would explode from the methane." She told him, and he burst out in loud, boisterous laughter, his head thrown back and his eyes twinkling merrily.

"I have to admit, you may be a manipulative little succubus but I do love your way with words." He told her, tweaking her nose between his thumb and forefinger. She jerked her head back and slapped his hand away.

"What do you think I wanted from you, exactly Negan? And why would I run off before I got it?" She demanded. "You think I was just dying to have your baby? That it was worth risking my life for?" 

Negans face grew grim and serious once more, his right hand grabbing her by her long hair and yanking her head painfully backwards. 

"You wanted power. You wanted to control me - tell me how to take care of business. When you realized it wasn't going to happen you went looking for somewhere you could take over." He replied through clenched teeth. "Thinking you had leverage nestled safe in your womb." He let go of her head and she sat up, rubbing her sore scalp. 

"I'm sorry you saw it like that. Did Simon happen to help you draw that conclusion?" She said, her voice still annoyed but slightly less hostile. Dwight shot them a nervous look and Negan frowned at him. Was there something more going on in his empire that he hadn't seen? 

"All that matters is you're back where you belong - and you have a few months to convince me not to decorate the yard with your corpse once that kid is safe in it's fathers arms."  Negan said, turning away from her to face Carl again. "And Carl here is one hell of a babysitter." He smiled at the young man as they drove in to the old factory Negan called his Sanctuary.  It felt more like a prison to Lacey. 

Negan had Dwight take Carl to a room upstairs with his inner circle and ordered him to see the boy was comfortable but well guarded. He led Lacey by the wrist to his own suite of rooms. She had spent more time here than she cared to remember.  Once it had seemed as close to love as she knew, if she was honest with herself. Love and sex and fear and pain had always been mixed up together in her world. 

"Why the hell is it that you have to always do the opposite of what I tell you to do?" Negan started in on her as soon as they were alone. "I was trying to keep you safe!" He declared, grabbing her by the shoulders and pulling toward him before surprising her by wrapping his arms around her and kissing the top of her head. Lacey was baffled and the look on her face said as much.

"Since when did you decide you wanted to be a father, Negan? I know you make sure your 'wives' don't get knocked up. When I told you I was pregnant…"

"I was shocked. I can admit that. And I didn't want to have a baby with those girls, you're right. They're beautiful but not exactly well endowed in the brains department if you know what I mean. They'd make terrible mothers." He sat down on his sofa, both arms stretched out and his leg resting on one knee. He looked every bit the king of his domain. 

Lacey could only stare at him, he was perhaps the most confusing person she had ever encountered. 

"You think I was planning some kind of coup on your little empire here, but you trust me to have your child?" She sat down and gawked at him with no attempt to mask her disbelief. He chuckled and leaned forward, elbows on his knees.

"Well, see, I happen to be certain you don't have it in you to be cruel. Especially to an innocent." He replied, stroking her cheek with one finger and licking his lips as if she made the wolf in him very hungry. 

There was a knocking on the door just then that startled Lacey and made her jump like a frightened rabbit. 

"Enter!" Negan boomed out, obviously irritated at the interruption. Simon poked his head in the door, his little weasel eyes darting around nervously. 

"You wanted to see me, boss?" 

When his eyes fell on Lacey, seated comfortably on a sofa and very much alive, his jaw went slack. Negan smiled at his right hand man and waved him in. 

"Simon! Yes yes yes. I did ask Dwight to send you my way, come on in." Negan told him jovially. He patted the seat beside himself. "Sit down. Would you like a drink?" 

"Uh…" Simon stammered and blinked, his mind trying to find a way out of the grave he had surely dug himself. "No, thank you." 

"You sure?" Negan pressed, standing and moving to pour two fingers of scotch into a tumbler for himself. "I'd offer you one Lacey, but well.." he gestured at her stomach and shrugged. She kept silent and watched what was unfolding with curiosity. Simon looked over at Lacey and when he saw the gentle curve of her stomach, any blood which remained in his face drained quickly. Negan poured a second drink and handed it to the weasel of a man with his handlebar mustache. Simon's hand trembled slightly as he took it, and he tossed the double shot back in one swallow.

"That's more like it!" Negan exclaimed, patting Simon on the back with enough force to nearly knock him off the couch. "It's a party, after all! One of our own returned to us, safe and sound." 

Lacey didn't want to smile, she didn't mean to smirk in amusement as she started to realize Negan had his suspicions about what had actually happened two months earlier. He had never been a stupid man, even if his penchant for violence might suggest it to some people. Simon was sweating now, she could see it glistening on his high forehead. 

"Now. Tell me again how you knew Lacey had 'run off'." Negan said, sitting down again, close enough that his knee almost touched Simon's.

"Uh. Well, if I remember right…" he swallowed hard, his adams apple bobbing up and down almost comically. "I was on watch that night and uh…" Simon looked back and forth between Lacey and Negan. "Well, hell, boss, what did she say I did, exactly? I'd like to be able to defend myself." He changed tactics from defense to offense. 

"That sounds like a hell of an idea. Let's hear it from the lady herself." Negan said, saluting Lacey with his glass before taking a sip and smacking his lips with an exaggerated 'ah!' of satisfaction. 

"Do you think she's going to tell you the truth? She'll say or do anything to get what she wants." Simon spoke up and Negan held his hand up to silence him.

"Would you prefer I ask Dwight?  Because see, here's the thing. I think you're lying to me. You know I can't tolerate that." Simon shifted uncomfortably, his mouth opening and closing but other than a spitting sputtering sound, nothing came out.

"Why Simon, do I detect the odor of you shittin' your god damned britches?" Negan grinned. "What do you think we should do with dear Simon, Lacey?" 

"You could strip him down to his drawers and toss him out in the middle of the night. Then send a dozen of the others to hunt him down like a dog." She finally found her voice. Negan scowled at her, shooting her a look that asked for confirmation that that was what he had done to her. When he could see it in her eyes and in Simon's guilty expression, Negan snapped. He lunged at the man he had trusted and although Simon was fairly strong, Negans wrath made him almost inhuman. Once he got his hands around Simon's throat the man never stood a chance. 

Lacey watched as Negan squeezed the last breath from Simon, his face turning purple and his eyes bulging, blood vessels popping in them like fireworks. She wanted to be the sort of person who would step up and ask Negan to show mercy,  but she couldn't find it in her heart.  Not for Simon.

When Negan was satisfied that there was no chance the man would ever breathe again, he stood and composed himself, smoothing back his black hair and straightening his shirt. He went to the door and called out to the others.

"Come get this piece of shit out of my sight. Put him on the fence with the others." He ordered.

*******************************

"Did you know?" Rick demanded of Daryl, pacing rapidly back and forth in the living room of the house Rick shared with Michone. 

"I knew she was pregnant." Daryl offered, sitting in a chair, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands.

"And you never bothered to ask her about the father?" Michone asked, just as angry as Rick that Carl had been kidnapped by that monster. 

"She didn't want to talk about it. Wasn't none of my business." Daryl growled back. 

"None of your…?" Michone threw her hands up in the air in exasperation.  "What DO you know about her, Daryl?"

"I never thought I'd see the day your feelings got in the way of your common sense." Rick snarled at Daryl. "Not you."

"How do we even know she isn't a part of one of his demented tests?" Michone added.

"She ain't. I know her, she wouldn't do that." Daryl objected weakly.

"Oh, you know her so well you didn't even know she was sleeping with that son of a bitch!" Rick exploded. Daryl clamed up and glared at his best friend. He was hurting and afraid. He wanted to run, he wanted to hurt someone. But not Rick, not Michone. He wasn't angry with them, he reminded himself. 

Had she been lying to him? Was it possible she was just as cruel and twisted as Negan? He couldn't believe it. He ran his hands through his hair in frustration.

"We need to go in there and take the Saviors down, just like we planned." He finally spoke up again.

"How do we trust the information she gave us? It could be a trap." Michone said.

"No, he's got us right where he wants us, if he wanted us dead we already would be." Rick replied, still pacing, his hands on his hips.

"We can't just sit here on our thumbs!" Daryl yelled, standing and moving for the door.

"Don't go off half cocked and get Carl killed!" Rick told him, laying a hand on Daryl's arm to stop him. "We'll get in there - we will end this. I promise you that."

"You'd better do it fast." Daryl growled, shaking Rick's hand off and storming down the steps.

"Where are you going?" Rick called after him.

"Hilltop!" Daryl shouted back, not slowing his stride. If Rick wasn't ready to help him, he'd find someone who was.

[haila-wetyios]

Hero

Part 5/?? of A visit to the end of the world.

“Bellator huh… Originally it was one of the many A11Y’s. His body resembled a giant snowman. Hah.. He’d probably fit in Alvarium well from looks alone.” Haila’s smile, although bright, eventually simmers down into a sad one. She’d been sitting around, idly talking to either Twelves or the Overseer whenever a break was available from all the pieces that had been put together. 

“He started off dreaming of being a hero someday, though I was always curious over how he got his hands on children’s stories like that. He had a sword that could heat at high levels… My company and I ran into Bellator a few times in the past before Florus- Well, before Icarus was found. Some weren’t fond of the idea of a child A.I., and others weren’t even sure if it was alive or a machine.”

She paused briefly, looking up at whoever was listening. “Running into a new form of life is bound to cause those reactions after all. Especially when we think we’re the only ones ‘alive’. But a shared unspoken part we all had was that we never wanted to fight Bellator. And in the end, we never did.” She sighed some in relief at that, though her hands that had been around a mug of soup were still gripped rather tightly around it. 

“I believe I was the one that kept calling them Ally back then since all A11Y’s shared a network, and thus shared the same name. It wasn’t until a long time afterwards, when they got to settle down temporarily under surveillance that it was decided that they would have a name. Bellator chose to let everyone give him ideas, and then it would pick the one it liked the most.” she leaned back, looking up at the ceiling. 

“I wasn’t there, at least not exactly. But I hear my son, little toddler as he is who only thinks of sweets, suggested the name for him. It means ‘warrior’ in garlean dialect.” she went silent for a time afterwards. She’d omitted the darkest part of the story, because the other A.I.s should know ‘who’ their siblings had been in their very essence over everything else. There was enough of a grim prospect everywhere right now after all. 

“I believe Bellator was the one out of all the siblings that understood a few cruelties of the world while still managing to love. But, he is still young as well. Accumulated data doesn’t matter in this.” she shook her head some at that. Looking up at her listener. “No matter how much knowledge can be stored on an A.I. that is starting off, living through an experience is far more relevant than reading information about it.”

“Listening in order to understand. Even if it hurts, even if it brings happiness, ‘tis the beauty of living. To be able to see both sides of the coin before drawing conclusions and tracing a path for yourself. But the moment that you decide to stop listening. If that moment comes, that could spell the end of several possibilities for you. And it will hinder your growth from now on. Your ability to heal and seek something that could fulfill you.”

Once more, there was a long pause at that. 

“That is the advice that a set of jewelry can give you.”

“Though…”

“I wish I could have done more. I wish I could have protected all of them.”

“........”

“I did all that I could for Bellator. Just like some of the others that were there also did.”

It wasn’t a lie, and, for a moment, she could recall exactly how Bellator looked after everything that had taken place. Broken and barely able to move as she finally plucked his core out to keep it safe before the Alliance could find it. 

“I want to help him heal. And give him a hand to get back up, wherever he may be now. ‘Tis the least I can do for him and all the others. You all lack a ‘parent’ figure in it’s essence, and while it may not be necessary in other’s eyes, ‘tis the job of those that came before to entrust and help those that come after.”

She spoke as if Bellator was alive despite the reports. However, one crucial detail remained. She never disclosed exactly where they were. Even here, she was being careful.