#this is actually kinda my fave fic rn

[iceunhie]

So, um, I don't have any brainrot because my brain is dead. But ever since the trailer, I CAN'T STOP SIMPING AT NEUVILLETTE OH MY GOD. AND THOSE VIDEOS WITH THE OTTERS TOO SHSJSJKSKM

Sorry. Haven't been able to throw up my love for him to anyone so, yeah.

For a request, maybe painter! reader who wants to paints him? I mean, he is too majestic to not have any paintings of him hanging somewhere.

Thank you, and lots of loveee. It's okay if you don't want to write this too

AFFALATUS.

summary: in which you, an aspiring painter in Fontaine finds your muse in the ever-steadfast Chief Justice, and what better way do you express such a fondness for the Chief Justice than to use your artistic skillset to capture him in all his glory? ah, and perhaps capture his heart on the way.

notes: neuvillette x GN!reader (implied fem due to Neuvillette's use of 'my lady' though). comedic(?) super fluffy (haha are you sure abt that?) reader shenanigans, misunderstandings and reader being a simp (like me) sap, neuvillette is a sweetheart and i may have gotten carried away help. she fell first he fell harder trope, dialogue focused and relationship development mostly. reblogs are greatly appreciated!

Sometimes, you think that had you not chosen to be an artist; a painter, to be specific, you would certainly do well as a Bard, or a writer. The sheer amount of poems and song you could conjure up in your head detailing the fine traits and qualities of such a finely procured man such as Neuvillette would certainly make you someone of great renown, as you could prescribe and go on and on about his person. Would you be displayed at the Palais Mermonia, perhaps? As a fine appreciator for the Chief Justice's conduct?

Haha, your foot. Fontaine would sink itself under the waters before you would be recognized, much less acknowledged. Such was the pain of being but an ordinary person, getting by the day slowly but surely.

Artists all look for their muse. Whether be in in music, the nuances of literary work, or in your chosen profession, the art of color, the art of capturing life at its most raw form through the canvas. painting. It just so happens that your current muse happens to be the wonderful, all knowing, and breathtakingly striking Monsieur Neuvillette.

Which is what led you to your current conundrum. How would you be able to capture his image? Sure, there were official shots of the Chief Justice, but you would never be satisfied with that. The real deal is always the best reference. (you don't want to admit it, but you know you could easily paint him with but a few pictures as a reference point. you simply wanted to see him up close, says that shameless heart of yours.)

Monsieur Neuvillette was a very, very busy man. Simply garnering an audience with him would cause much of your yearly savings and the sparsity of your visit would never let you finish that painting of his image truly capturing his allure. But you were never one to give up once you've set your sights on something, though.

...Which, unfortunately, leads you into more trouble than it's worth.

Your face burned in embarrassment as the Chief Justice himself scoured through your paintings and sketches personally, humming absentmindedly in between them, calmly sitting with you in his very quarters at the Palais Mermonia. You didn't expect that Monsieur Neuvillette would be so perceptive, as he immediately noticed you following him (if only to document his actions and sketch him) and for him to personally interrogate you about your actions. Well, it didn't matter anymore, so might as well fess up, right? The last thing you would want is for your dearly beloved muse to think you were some sort of deranged stalker, and you end up with some sort of crime....

While the morbid curiosity of seeing what he was like in an official trial was tempting, you pushed that thought away as you began to sputter out your words.

"Please forgive me for my disrespectful actions, Chief Justice! I swear, I had no malicious intentions at all...!"

you immediately spill out the words, a thousand apologies ready to spill itself out your mouth. to your great surprise and relief, the Chief Justice simply shakes his head, as he puts down your sketches of him.

"Please, it's no offense at all. If anything, I am flattered that I am a subject to most of your impressive works, my lady. your talent is remarkable."

"...Pardon?" you look at him, disbelief coloring your face. this was unexpected.

"You actually... think that my work is, is good?"

The man next to you nods, his face not betraying a single emotion. Goodness, you could almost faint. He was even more beautiful up-close. Such sharp eyes, and such unique patterns... ahem.

"If you wished to capture me as a work for your latest masterpiece, my lady, you must at least inform me, or schedule an appointment with me. I would be more than happy to oblige."

"But I don't have the Mora, Chief Justice..."

"Ah. That can be arranged."

You thank the Hydro Archon for Monsieur Neuvillette's kindness. To think that he personally arranged a meeting for you to sketch him and bring your dreams of capturing him in a portrait come true...

Oh, you shall put all of your modus operandi into this piece, now that your spark has been lit. This is a debt you will definitely not forget, and you hope that your portrait can repay that.

And so, for over the next few months, you would arrive at the Palais Mermonia with a specially curated trinket (personally handed to you by Neuvillette) to show to the Melusine Sedene to access a personal audience with the Chief Justice. For the first few weeks, you're besought with joy at the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

You would sketch and accompany Neuvillette as he would do his business. When asked by him as to why you did this, when you were simply capturing his image, he said, you sent him a mortified look, before you explained.

"Art is not just simply putting what you see on a canvas, Monsieur. It is observing, emulating, and envisioning the subject and using that as a way to bring life and meaning to a canvas. It is the very expression of the soul, a longing to etch what the artist thinks is beautiful to a permanent surface...! Ah."

"So you believe that I am such a subject?"

You look sheepish, as you had begun to ramble and reveal your fondness for him.

"Forgive my insolence, Chief Justice. My talk of the arts may not suit your fancy or disinterest you..."

"Neuvilette."

"Yes?"

"...I do not mind you wishing to converse with me. As I shall see you more for the next months as you bring your work to life, as you say, addressing me not by my title is mandatory. I would prefer it if you would simply call me by my name, my lady."

"And..." he looks at you, a little more softly this time. "I do not mind being subject to your talk of the arts either. Converse with me about such things if it makes you feel comfortable."

"...Understood. Then, Sir Neuvillette, I am [name]. I look forward to working with you."

"As do I, Miss [name]."

He offers his hand for you to shake, and you feel yourself flush just a bit, before you firmly shake hands, as you smile at him gratefully.

Little did you know, that your talk of the arts caught his interest, as did his curiousity of you.

"Why do artists such as you enjoy to be so swayed by your work, Miss [name]? To the point where your ilk would happily go without a human's basic needs.... It is fascinating to me. Is this a common characteristic among the practitioners of those who dabble in the arts? What drives your kind to be so interested in such things so deeply?"

Overtime, as Neuvillette and you both eased into the steady routine of you observing him, sketching him, making a few brushstrokes in your canvas, and him simply going about his day, conversations about the subtleties of human life and human needs became a common source of pleasant conversation.

To Neuvillette's great surprise, and secret appreciation, your views were unique, and completely different from his, or any other average Fontainian citizen. Your contrasting views are evident by your conversations, as you both try to understand the other through talks of the ways humans think, and how they live their lives in spite of how fleeting it is. He thinks of you as peculiar, but he doesn't dislike it. If anything, he finds it endearing. That your mind would be able to reach conclusions that even he would not be able to reach. That you hold onto your views in such a beautiful and captivating way.

He enjoyed it. He very much enjoyed your company, and your discussions. He hasn't felt such feelings in such a long, long time. The feeling of being understood, and being challenged. Of being... calmed and liking someone's presence, of being fond of it, even.

As even more months passed, conversations like that have also been overtaken by conversations about your daily lives, as you ramble about your day as you continue your work on the canvas, and the normally silent halls of his chambers fill with your and his voice, as you both revel in each other's company.

Neuvillette thinks he's never seen such a fascinating individual such as you. Who can question and break down his steady beliefs, and who he was able to open up to with time.

He wonders to himself after you've long retired for the night. After you finish your work and these days of tranquility and these conversations he so cherished will end, would you grace him with your presence again? Or would you simply just see him as the ever righteous and untouchable Chief Justice once more, and not as 'Neuvillette', the one who conversed, questioned, and listened to your views, and would he simply see you as nothing more than a mere painter who simply took him as a subject to their latest work?

You both would become strangers, never entangling yourselves again as your lives go on.

For some reason, the thought of that makes his heart twist uncomfortably.

The painting of Neuvillette is stunning.

You almost burst into tears of joy at the finished work. Yes, yes, this was it! Your work and efforts have finally paid off. Countless hours and different techniques tried, many changes and many frustrated nights, and it has finally been completed.

Brushstrokes of different shades of blue, the vibrant background, and the features of the Chief Justic-- No, the features of Neuvillette. The painting dons him in an expression of tranquility, as fleeting as his expression is, it is forever captured in color, with you as the sole witness to it.

Now, the only thing you have to do is deliver it to Neuvillette's chambers. He did promise you compensation, after all. Who were you to disagree? And for the price he gave... Ah, being able to grow close to him meant you were of course paid well for your efforts, after all.

(not that you would care if he didn't compensate you or not. his company and his leniency to your actions and your passion, as well as letting him see and hear your thoughts and feelings and let you listen to his pondering for the months that passed would have left you satisfied anyway. such was your enamoured state with him.)

It's raining heavily when you arrive at his chambers one final time. Sedene greets you, as if used to your presence already, by how much you frequent. You feel a pang of inexplicable sadness at bidding Neuvillette's company a final farewell.

You would soon be just a spectator, and never truly see 'Neuvilette' again as you did at the months that passed. The conversations, the familiar routine of chatting with him about inane to deep topics.... Yes, you shall miss it as well.

You wonder if he'll miss it too. (will he miss you?) You can only take a deep breath, as you knock on his chambers for one last time.

"...Come in, Miss [name]."

As expected, your work is beautiful. Neuvillette was not lying when he thought of that last statement. Your portrait of him is serene, calming, and... and so lovingly curated by you.

Unlike most of his official portraits and pictures, this particular portrait exudes an aura of familiarity, a testimony to your bond that has slowly developed with time. this portrait was created with the intention of capturing him as 'Neuvilette.' Not as the Chief Justice of Fontaine, not as the leader of the Marchaussee Phantom, but simply as the Neuvillette you spent time with, you indulged in, and grew fond of.

(did you grow fond of him as he did of you? did he occupy your thoughts, as you did with his own?)

His heart skips, but this time it's an intense feeling of longing. He doesn't wish to be deprived of your presence, of your comfort.

Of your warmth, just yet.

"...euvilette? Neuvilette?" your voice is soft, he thinks. it snaps him from his thoughts, as he looks at you, and he sees you donning and expression of sheepishness, hesitancy.

"it is lovely. your work, i find it exquisite, [name]."

he turns to look at you, his expression softening. for the first time in a long time, his lips curl into a real, genuinely happy smile. (only for you.)

you flush at his words, as you hang your head down, your expression betraying the true extent of your feelings towards his words (and towards him.)

there is a few beats of silence, before one of you takes the plunge.

"If I may, may I be inclined to seek your company... even after our arrangement has ended? if, if it isn't bothering you, of course."

you blink at him, processing his words for a few moments, before a radiant smile graces your face, mirth overtaking your expression.

"Of course."

your words make his heart beat once more, as he feels this foreign feeling invade his conscious once again. he doesn't hate it.

the heavy rainfall stops, as does his worries and his doubts. he may not know exactly what this feeling is right now, but there's one thing he can't deny.

He's glad you came into his unchanging, ever-present world, like a splash of color to his normally dull, rigid life. He recalls a conversation you had once before.

To you, art was the expression of the soul, the permanent etch borne of its creator's love bleeding through a myriad of brushstrokes of passion, comfort, longing and intense desire. coalescing into one form, a permanent fixture of the unchanging and deep feelings that only a few would truly want to understand in its whole. To want to uncover everything, and appreciate it in its entirety.

While it may have been you that called him your muse, and it may have been you that called him to be a 'work of art,' Neuvillette can't help but think that it was you, who truly deserved such a title.

© 𝐌𝐇𝐈𝐈𝐄𝐄𝐄 : do not repost, copy, or plagiarize my work.

[greensaplinggrace]

unfortunately i'm like 160 episodes into tma and still don't get the obsession with martin. like i don't hate him but also- literally every other character and relationship is more interesting. also fanon version of him sucks lol. canon version of him is actually appealing to me in some ways, but considering fanon martin makes 90% of tma fic unreadable, i'm not too stoked about even having him tagged half the time.

[seiwas]

i maxxed the tags (what did i expect) but!!

what a soft piece ari 🥺 thank you for sharing this hurt/comfort piece w us!! i think satoru will always be a figure of strength—but i think it’s in part because that’s how he brands himself to be around the people he cares about. he’ll never truly share how he thinks and feels about things, will almost always downplay it really. but he’s always worrying, always aware and cautious, overthinking 🥺 and i felt that loads here!!

there’s a shipwreck stuck between your ribs ; satoru gojo

synopsis; three times satoru sees you cry, and the understanding you gain of each other from it.

word count; 4.6k

contents; satoru gojo/reader, gn!reader, the synopsis speaks for itself i think, copious amounts of hurt/comfort, i just think he’d be so good at comforting u :ccc, also fluff!!, he’s addicted to calling u ”baby,” satoru gojo vs human emotion (he loses)

a/n; pls ignore the fact that 90% of my gojo fics are hurt/comfort ok we dont need to get into that <33 the writing in this one might be a lil rusty but im pretty fond of this gojo :’3

dim lights, buttery popcorn, and boredom.

the senses invading his mind are mellow, coaxing, a little tedious. all he can see are the buzzing lights before him, all he can hear is the insistent chewing of the people around him, and all he can feel is just that:

boredom.

satoru stifles a yawn, resting his cheek on the heel of his palm. he’s trying to pay attention — really, he is. trying to pay attention to the movie he picked out himself, after thoughtful consideration, one he’s been looking forward to watching with you all week. he’s trying his best. but, gosh, it’s just so boring.

or maybe he just doesn’t have it in him today — with all these too-dim lights, too-loud popcorn-chewers, and the too-convoluted plot playing on the big screen in front of him. he has no idea what��s happening, anymore, what scene this is supposed to be. some sob-story? he clocked out a while ago.

so, with nothing better to do — satoru decides to savour another view.

that’s how it always goes. no matter the movie, no matter the snacks, whether you’re watching at home on the couch or a nearby movie theatre — eventually, when his eyelids begin to grow heavy, or when his attention span begins to falter, that blue-soaked gaze of his shifts. a moth to a flame, following his instincts. constantly looking over to see what kind of face you're making. 

after all, your reactions are far more entertaining than any movie could ever hope to be. little sighs of exasperation, jolts and shivers down your spine, or a laughter so bubbly he can’t resist leaning in for a kiss or ten — he loves it. adores it. lives and dies by it. 

so satoru turns his head, and looks at you, knowing you’ll save him from the boredom clutching at his subconscious. 

and something in his chest constricts.

at first, he doesn’t notice it. hungrily lapping over the expanse of your jaw, to your cheekbones, his gaze drinking in everything he can see. scanning your eyes for a hint of emotion; and he finds it. he finds it in something that glimmers in the dim lighting of the theatre, something that has his breath drawing back to the depths of his throat.

tears.

crystalline, dew-drawn, a fresh set of tears clinging to the edge of your lash line. they’ve yet to fall, but satoru sees them — he sees them and he doesn’t know what to do. 

tears. 

tears?

you’re crying.

in the depths of your glassy eyes, he sees a fractured scene — playing against the scope of your iris, as the movie reflects off your pupils. there’s a turmoil there, a sadness, one that has you covering your mouth with the front of your knuckle. and you’re crying.

satoru wants to tease you. he wants to lean over and purr against the shell of your ear, poke fun at you for being so emotional. such a little baby. what else is he supposed to do?

the tricky part is that he can’t. he can’t move, can’t shape his voice into a purr, can’t even speak. he’s frozen in place like a bug trapped in amber, stuck to his seat, unable to do anything but blink at you in what he thinks might be bewilderment.

his breath hitches — and that’s all. 

something about the sight of you makes him falter, makes him stop in his tracks. catches him off guard. he doesn’t know what to do, doesn’t recognize the feeling stirred deep within his chest, something discomforting and foreign. doesn’t understand why his heart feels so itchy, all of a sudden.

then your eyes meet.

and you blink. once, then twice. eyes just a little wide, an embarrassed kind of surprise. he thinks you must be flustered, and he’s proven right when your gaze flees from his.

a mingle of words clog up at the base of his throat. say something, say something, say something. but he doesn’t know what. 

he wets his lips, preparing to part them, but before he can get the first syllable out you're leaning in. close. close enough that he feels your breath ghost against the shell of his ear, close enough that his heart starts skipping the way it always does when you press yourself against him like that’s where you belong.

a whisper. it’s small, hushed, a little frail. but there’s something else, too, laced together with the vowels — amusement. 

”you didn’t tell me this was a sad movie.”

a pout plays at your lips, as you murmur your grievances. but then there’s that amusement; it’s there when you pull back, in the crinkle of your sparkling eyes, the curve of your smile. 

and satoru’s shoulders relax. stiffened bones melting. he exhales a breath he had no idea he was holding, and his heart feels at ease. a grin finds it’s way to his lips, wide, teasing, cheshire and sweet. 

he leans a little closer, bumping his head against yours. gently. ”i think you’re just sensitive, baby.”

his teasing is rewarded with a little huff, as your elbow meets his side. soft. everything you do is soft. 

”oh, shut up,” you scoff. smiling. he’s so relieved that you’re smiling. 

a moth to a flame, following his instincts, satoru brings you closer. an arm around your waist, pulling you into his orbit, until you’re practically sharing seats. searching for your hand — and he finds it, intertwining his long fingers with yours, just to give it a little squeeze.

(for some reason, he feels more protective than usual.)

he feels your gaze. questioning, maybe. but you melt into him quickly, with your head slumped against his shoulder, and his heart settles back into a sleepy rhythm. just watching the movie pass you by.

the dim lighting of the theatre casts a hazy shadow over your face, a tender desaturation, and his eyes stay glued to it when you aren’t looking. the smell of popcorn hangs heavy in the air, salty and buttery, warm and sweet, and he’s almost grateful to feel that familiar boredom tug at his veins.

anything is fine. anything is better than that discomfort, that irritating itch. 

satoru watches the movie flicker by, scene by scene, whispering commentary into your ear and stealing your popcorn with a satisfied hum. chuckling when you whisper-shout at him to cut it out!

he tries not to think of the glittering tears at your lash line, and almost succeeds.

rain clouds, cups of chamomile, and frustration.

it seeps out into the open air, engulfing your living room in a feverish haze. thick and suffocating; the scent of heavy rain, lukewarm tea, and that ugly, ugly feeling underneath his skin.

it pulses. it itches. and oh, how it aches.

satoru hates it. he hates feeling angry, feeling upset — hates when either of those emotions are in connection to you. hates it, hates it, hates it more than anything.

he does everything he possibly can to avoid it; his eyes are keen, always have been, and he can see when that thin line he shouldn’t cross crawls a little too close for comfort. when the rubber band of your patience just snaps. he sees all your buttons, knows which ones not to push. he knows you.

and, more importantly, more than anything — nothing you do could ever make him angry at you. 

(well, at least that’s what he thought.) 

satoru’s anger is a fickle thing, controlled, kept under wraps. it’s a slow process; it simmers, boils, a cup of chamomile brewed too long. and then it all but invades his senses. it never gets the best of him, never, but right now he can feel it — little pinpricks against his skin, a frustration that stirs his guts and has his eyes going cold.

satoru towers over you, like this. full height on display. not slouching or draping himself over furniture, but standing tall, and proud, and menacing. he isn’t smiling, and that’s all you need to know that he’s upset with you. his eyes are layered over with discontentment. 

a sigh spills from his lips, a little gruff, unmistakably annoyed. it slices the silence of the room in half, and a shiver travels down your spine. he doesn’t notice it. his voice has a rough edge to it, something firm. something that doesn’t sound like it could come out of his mouth at all.

”don’t act like such a child.”

a flinch. or maybe more like a jolt; this time, he notices, but it’s too late. he’s in too deep, boiled water licking at his ankles, pulling him down. frustration nips at his skin, and he can’t quite seem to push it away.

and you’re just so, so unaccustomed to it. unaccustomed to seeing him wear anything but a smile, unaccustomed to that cold gaze, usually nothing but warm and fond when it meets your own. this isn’t like him.

it’s not like him at all.

swallowing thickly, you do your best to calm down. but before you can make any attempt to contain it, wetness begins to gather in the corners of your eyes. pooling, little droplets yearning to fall.

satoru notices them instantly. he sees that sad glimmer, framed by the murky darkness seeping in from beyond the curtains, accompanied by the symphony of pitter patter against the windowpane. tears, much like the rain beating down outside.

and his chest goes cold.

a tiny sniffle pushes past your lips, and the dam inside you begins to break — tears tripping over your lash line, rolling down your cheeks. cascading across your pretty face. the air fills with a sense of dread, and both of you seem to be thinking the exact same thing.

(oh, fuck.)

satoru notices, belatedly, that his throat has gone dry. that his heart feels itchy, again. it itches and itches but he can’t do anything to soothe it, and your tears continue to fall. 

his heart begins to crack. right down the middle, like a gash in the reflection of a puddle, right across his chest. it hurts.

an inhale, then an exhale. you’re still trying to keep it all together, grasping for control over your emotions, but it’s not going too well. the little breaths that escape your throat are shaky at best, hands trembling as you wipe the tears away with the front of your wrists. and your voice sounds a little like it’s about to crumble away. 

”sorry,” you squeak, taking a step back. there’s a silent panic in the gesture, one that makes satoru want to get down on his knees. ”i’ll just — i’ll leave —”

he wants to stop you. he needs to stop you. but he does nothing, nothing at all, even as you stumble out. leaving the haunting echo of tiny sniffles and tear-stained cheeks behind you. 

satoru just stands there. once again, the sight of your tears seems to render him completely helpless. useless.

and he's frustrated, honestly. frustrated by the argument, by your tears, by his own guilt. he’s so frustrated he wants to claw his eyes out. he scratches at his forearm, but it does no good. all he can think of is your frightened little expression.

(he scared you.)

satoru slumps down on the couch, head in his hands, running rough fingers through his soft hair. it’s unruly by the time he’s done, and his bottom lip is bruised with teeth marks, and everything in the world feels so meaningless. so out of tune.

(he made you cry.)

a sigh. drawn out, tinged with exhaustion, bitter and battered like the swing of a baseball bat. he feels a little like he could throw up. it’s foreign, this emotion, suffocating. how long has it been since he genuinely felt this kind of shame?

the crack in his heart grows deeper, while you’re gone. more severe. every moment you spend outside of his vision makes him falter more and more, makes his desperation grow. desperate to plead for your forgiveness, to convince you not to leave. to wipe the tears away from your cheeks, delicately, the way you deserve. but he can do nothing but sit there, useless, repeating the same old phrase inside his mind.

he’ll make it up to you.

and when you finally come back, having calmed down a bit, he does just that. you’re embarrassed, he can tell, a little meek. it makes him feel that discomforting emotion, again, that ache. the crack that only ever seems to deepen.

but he covers it all up with a smile. a little sheepish, more than a little forced, but he hopes you understand. hopes you can see his remorse, see a man who loves you, because he does. 

so satoru takes you into his arms, softly, hands finding the small of your back. delicate, protective. a little whisper spilling from his lips. 

”’m sorry, baby. i didn’t mean it.”

and it’s not enough. he knows it isn’t. but he does what he can — even when it just ends up clumsy, teasing, bordering on something that most would interpret as insincere. all he can do is coddle you. shower you in hugs and kisses, gifts and praises. he hands it out like candy, eager hands finding yours, everything spilling out of his chest all at once. 

there’s a desperation to it that isn’t lost on you.

but it works. he’ll make it up to you; he swears. and he dotes on you until you’re too embarrassed to be sad anymore, apologizes until his throat runs dry. until he’s sure you believe him. 

he brews you another cup of chamomile, stirred to perfection, warm enough to make up for the shiver he sent down your spine. the rain beating down on your windows serves as a constant reminder of his failure, and satoru does his best to ignore it. swallowing what’s left of his frustration, focusing on you.

anything to see you smile again. anything to wash away the red tint to your eyes, the puffy skin beneath them. anything to hear you laugh, to get you to feel safe around him again. 

(anything to make him forget the sight of those tears rolling down your cheeks.)

panic, panic, panic.

it’s all he can feel, all he can think, the only emotion his muddled mind can cling to. he’s in pure, sincere, genuine panic, and you aren’t saying a thing. can’t bring yourself to.

arms wrapped around his waist, tightly, you hide away in the crook of his neck. clutching the fabric of his shirt, burrowing your face deeper into his warmth — and you’re not just crying.

you’re downright sobbing.

satoru knew something was off the moment you fell into his embrace, suddenly, tackling him into a hug so desperate it left him reeling. a kind of desperation he isn’t used to, from you.

he knew something was wrong. 

he knew even before he heard it; your choking sobs, those shaky, heaving breaths. muffled into the cotton of his shirt, his uncertain arms around you.

they break his heart.

”hey, hey…” there’s a soothing lilt to his voice, awfully delicate. sweet like molten honey, almost enough to hide the panic. ”what’s wrong?”

satoru holds you to his chest, safe and secure, cradling you protectively. as if shielding you from the world — from whatever or whoever got you like this. as if you’d crumble into dust, otherwise.

he tries to calm down, but his mind is spinning like a broken clock, and your silence doesn’t help. you’re trying to respond; he knows you are, but you just can’t get the words out. any attempts only make you cry harder.

a shake of your head is all he gets — and it’s not much, but satoru’s learned to make a lot out of a little. 

so he continues to hold you, hiding his worry, tucking his anxiety away somewhere you won’t be able to see. he curses, inwardly, grasping blindly for conclusions — for some divine guidance. how is he supposed to deal with this?

(how long has it been since he felt so very useless?)

gentle. that’s the approach he takes, finally, hiding his nervosity. he rocks you back and forth, just a little, like he’s lulling you to sleep; his warm hands finding the small of your back, the back of your head. cradling you so close you hear his rapid heartbeat by your ear.

soothing whispers. murmured into your hair, so soft they seem to melt once they slip from his tongue, all honey and devotion. affection so palpable you taste it in the air, from the breaths he exhales. 

”it’s fine. i’m here, i’m here… i’ve got you.”

he doesn’t know what he’s doing, not really, but it seems to work. because you calm down, after a while, just sniffling into his neck and letting him soothe you. sobs and unstable heaves, turning into whimpers and shaky breaths. clinging to him all the while; so desperate for comfort, for him.

it makes him feel so, so desperate to protect you, to wash every single one of your worries away.

it’s unbearable, this aching desire. like a great, insatiable, unnamed something deep within the caverns of his chest, clawing at his ribcage, snarling and hissing, itching to break out so it can open its maw and devour you both.

(it’s ugly. it’s grotesque. it wants to keep you safe so badly it might kill him for it.)

a coo. sad, dripping with care, a comforting tone that he hopes you’ll find soothing. he smooths his palm down the back of your head, heavy, doting. it hurts so much to see you hurt.

”my baby….” satoru exhales, a little shaky. but he smiles, and he hopes you can hear it, hopes it’ll help mend the pain in your chest. ”what’s got you this upset, hm? you're worrying me, here…”

a broken sniffle. the guilt eats at you, gnaws at your bones, and all you can do is hide away in the crook of his neck. apologizing, your voice no more than a tremor of a breath.

”’m sorry…”

and satoru thinks his heart shatters. he can practically hear the crash, feel the broken, useless little pieces dig into his skin.

his arms travel down to your hips, steady, and he lifts you up. just for a second, just so he can plop down on the floor with you in tow — keeping you snuggled into his neck. seated on his lap with your legs around his waist, like you’re his baby koala.

”shh, it's okay,” he soothes, a grounding rumble of his chest right by your ear. he’s got you enveloped, wrapped up in his buzzing warmth, and all you can feel is him. ”you’re okay. no matter what it is, i'll take care of it, alright? you can rely on me.”

a moment passes. 

satoru clears his throat. nervous, suddenly. ”you know that, right?”

all you can give him is a shaky nod, but it’s enough. he sighs, in palpable relief, still rubbing circles into your back. ”okay,” he sneaks a hand underneath your shirt, tracing little shapes into your bare skin. ”good.”

he isn’t sure how long you spend there, on the floor, entirely focused on comforting you. washing away all your sadness, with every gentle caress, every soothing murmur of there, there… every little stutter of his heartbeat next to yours.

and when you’ve finally calmed down, melting under his touch and into his skin, arms going lax around his neck — satoru takes a breath. collecting himself, so you don’t have to. acting like his heart isn’t still a mess of crushed glass.

”you okay now?” he coos, drawing absentminded hearts into the skin of your back. his voice is teasing, but warm, spilling from his tongue and into your ear. deep and smooth. ”almost gave me a heart attack, baby.”

he feels the way your grip around him tightens, just a smidge, and he hears the weak little breath you draw in. your voice is still shaky, and it makes him want to rearrange the world, stitch those broken vowels back together. 

(he doesn’t like how irrational it is, this insatiable something. how it makes him want to bend the rules of the universe, just to see you smile. a dangerous temptation.)

”i’m sorry,” you croak, clinging to him like a shipwreck to a shore. ”it’s not — not a big deal, ’m just…” 

satoru pulls back. just a little bit, making sure your arms and legs stay in their rightful place, curled around his neck and waist. making sure the two of you stay connected.

then he pinches your cheek.

”don’t apologize,” he quips, a playful frown on his face. soft, a vague furrow of his brows. like he’s scolding you. 

it makes you wince, your eyes downcast. you look so meek. a little like a kicked puppy, glassy eyes glancing up at him in search of comfort.

satoru clicks his tongue. ”and don’t look at me like that, either.” 

he boops your nose, playful, doting, and you exhale weakly. it’s small, more breath than a real laugh, but you’re almost smiling, and —

it’s a start. it’s something.

satoru coos, voice dripping with warmth, sickeningly sweet. it seeps from his fingertips when he cradles your cheek in his palm, rubbing circles into the puffy skin beneath your eyes. there’s a mirth in his own, crinkled at the edges, tucked into that blue shade, something glazed over with pure adoration.

”there’s that smile.” 

he leans forward, closer, to press a kiss against the bridge of your nose, eyelashes fluttering. tickling your skin. you fall further into his embrace and he makes no move to resist, wouldn’t do it even if he physically could. even if he had the strength to let you go.

then he broaches the subject. hesitant. tactful, careful, delicate — he tries to remember how it works. how to handle something fragile. he thinks of those boxes you carried last week, little porcelain cups. heavy in his arms. he thinks of the way you jab his side with your elbow; gentle, always gentle, even though there’s never any need.

he thinks of you, and it all comes easy. that’s how it always goes.

”wanna talk about it?” he asks, softly. fingers treading through your hair, scratching softly at your scalp. it makes you melt, a little. clearing your throat.

”it’s nothing, really,” you mumble, tiny, seeking respite in the warmth that seeps from his body. speaking with a raspy voice, a hoarse throat, all tired out after crying. ”nothing big, anyway…” 

a moment passes, before you continue. ”i guess it's just been a rough week,” you admit, a sigh slipping from your lips, tinged with pure exhaustion. ”just little things piling up. ’m okay now.” 

a hum. satoru clears his throat.

”anything i can do?”

(please let me help.)

but you only shake your head. ”you’ve already done enough,” you assure him, leaning into his touch. ”think i just needed to get it all out, y’know?”

a beat. an itch. satoru holds you tight, a little tighter than he should. gentle, he reminds himself. but he needs you close enough to feel the flutter of your heartbeat, close enough to delude himself that you’ve merged together. closer isn’t close enough.

he gnaws at his bottom lip, teeth sinking into the flesh. pulling words out from the back of his throat, uncertain. ”i’m always here,” he settles on. ”if there’s anything you need, come straight to me. okay?”

a frown plays at your lips. you’re silent, for a while, until he hears you mumble beneath your breath.

”i don’t want to bother you so much, though…”

”— it’s not a bother.”

the words spill into the air, a little more firm than he meant to sound. but he means them.

”i’m serious. if you ever need help, with anything, come find me. i’m yours,” satoru inhales, deep, his chest moving in tune with the breath. you’re carried along with it, as if being lulled to sleep, following the steady pattern of his lungs. 

then he exhales. in, and out, and with it comes a promise. ”if anyone makes you cry, i’ll get rid of them.”

he says it casually, so casually that you assume it’s a joke, a bout of breathless giggles pushing past your lips. the sound has his own curling up, and he doesn’t have the heart to correct you. has enough tact to know that this might not be the best moment to let you know that he’s honestly a little terrified of how far he’d be willing to go to keep you safe and happy. 

but you’re smiling, finally, laughing. and that matters more than anything. when he closes his eyes, he thinks he can even feel the telltale signs that his heart is picking itself back up, gluing jagged shards into a shape that resembles you.

"that's scary!” you gasp, amusement bubbling up inside your throat. ”you’d go to jail for me?”

satoru huffs. ”bold of you to assume i’d get caught,” he tuts, a smug smile on his face. it makes you giggle, again, and he feels like a god.

”okay, okay,”  you nose at his neck, breathing him in, strawberry lotion and laundry detergent filling your senses. ”please don’t kill anyone on my behalf, though.”

”no promises.”

”satoru…”

slowly, steadily, his heart begins to stitch itself together. it helps that you’re there, he thinks. helps that you’re pressed up against him, that you’re holding him, like he’s the safest thing in the world. like you trust him.

(the word tastes like molten honey and luscious berries, sickly-sweet on his tongue. he gulps it down hungrily.)

it’s healing. the weight of your arms around him, the breaths that brush against his neck. he holds you to keep you together, intact, to keep himself together. a shipwreck and a shore — he just isn’t sure which one of you is which. but your jagged edges fit just right with his own.

”i don’t like seeing you cry.”

you blink. gazing up at him, with a contemplative look in your eyes. it melts into something a little too close to guilt for his liking. shame.

”— but i still want you to let me see you like that.” satoru smiles, with a tilt of his head. snowy tufts of hair falling across his face. ”is that weird?”

a moment passes. then you hum.

”no,” you exhale, a little breathless. smiling, somewhat weak, but still enough to have his heart skipping a beat. ”i love that about you, satoru.”

”huh?” he gapes at you — blinking dumbly. ”love what? that i want to see you sob into my chest?”

”that you try,” you stifle a yawn, sleepily nuzzling into him, all tuckered out from crying. ”even when it makes you a little uncomfortable.”

satoru stills. 

silence fills the space between you. there’s nothing more to say. his tongue isn’t really cooperating with him, anyhow — all tied up. so he leaves a kiss on the top of your head, and doesn’t say a word about the tremor running through his chest. 

he hates seeing you cry. hates how powerless it makes him feel, how useless. hates the fact that he can’t always protect you from the world, from himself.

but you let him see you like that.

he thinks of your tears, crystalline and glassy, like translucent marbles on a summer shore — and sees the trust instead of the sorrow. he thinks of your tearstained face, meek and feeble, and knows it’ll always be enough to break his heart to pieces. 

he thinks of you, and tells himself that it’s worth it; just as long as he gets to bring that pretty little smile back to life. 

[wonyoluv]

𝐖𝐋𝐖 & 𝐆𝐆 𝐅𝐢𝐜 𝐑𝐞𝐜𝐬 !! (๑>ᴗ<๑)

✧ some of my all time favorite fics & their amazing authors!! please show everybody lots of love ^^ [header creds. to @minvcrs] ✧ i'll keep updating this as i find more fics !! pls feel free to send in suggestions as well <3

✧ SMAUS ✧

BRUTAL - @mosinterlude [hanni x reader smau]

↳ this was such a fun concept for a smau & this author also has a rlly great niki smau if ur a fan of enhypen <3 looking forward to more of their works ^^

HALLWAY CRUSH - @xuqijie [haerin x reader smau]

↳ kinda reminds me of 2521 & it's just a rlly cute concept

HOW YOU GET THE GIRL - @jungwonize [rei x reader smau]

↳ this smau hasn't come out yet but im so hyped ^^ this author has rlly creative plots so definitely another blog to check out ;)

RUN2U - @yaeluvz [wonyoung x reader smau}

↳ i had the time of my life reading this smau bc it was just so funny & perfectly cute <3 loved wonyoung's portrayal bc it was just so endearing

FANWARS - @rosiehrs [yunjin x reader smau]

↳ i still haven't gotten the chance to read this smau but i can't wait to! the summary itself sounds so entertaining

FAULT LINES - @ctrlemis [wonyoung/jungwon x reader smau]

↳ jungwon and wonyoung are two of my ults so this smau was literally everything i had ever dreamed of

PLEASE! - @mingkuri [hanni x reader smau]

↳ not completely up to date with this smau but its so so funny <3 like i actually need to catch up rn bc it's amazing, not to mention it's abt the loml hanni pham <3_<3

THE ONLY EXCEPTION - @izfims [yujin x reader smau]

↳ just found this while i was going through my saved fics & it looks so cute so i need to go check it out like rn !! i'm definitely checking it out b4 i go to sleep tdy

✧ WRITTEN ✧

LOVER GIRL - @silantryoo [haerin x reader fluff]

↳ quite literally the cutest thing i've ever read ... i wish i could reread it but the author accidentally deleted their acc T_T if u haven't read it, take my word for it bc it was absolutely adorable 🫶 update: it’s been reposted!! so happy i could literally cry rn ���

CAN'T YOU SEE ME - @forhereyesonlyyy [yujin x reader fluff]

↳ it's honestly such a struggle to find authors for ive, but im so glad that i found this acc bc they write so well <3 definitely recommend checking it out :)

2, 4, 6, 8, WHO DO I APPRECIATE? - @chenle [yuna x reader fluff]

↳ an all time favorite of mine ^^ if i could only recommend one work in this post, this would be the one ... it literally came out 4 yrs ago & i still go back to read it <33 it's a cheerleader au & absolutely adorable,, also made me realize just how gay i am lol

CHICKEN SANDWICH - @kimsohn [winter x reader drabble]

↳ this is probably one of my fave drabbles from this acc bc it has fake dating which is one of my fave tropes but literally anything they write is amazing <3 this acc has sm diversity & writes for ggs like loona, aespa, ive & itzy !!

OCEAN VIEW - @seungiepup [gaeul x reader fluff]

↳ probably one of the only gaeul works i've seen on here but im so happy that i found it :) it's a perfect fluffy slice of life drabble

STUCO GF HCs - @iichaeyj [karina x reader fluff]

↳ this acc posts such great hcs & blurbs like i love reading them all sm. they havent posted much gg content, but i'd def recommend checking out all their works if you like txt or enhypen.

6:03 PM - @gfksn [ryujin x reader fluff]

↳ the cutest timestamp <33 like i just love ryujin sm & i feel like this captures her essence rlly well .. idk if that makes sense but plz check it out bc it's cute :)

DRESS ME UP - @hoonsmarsbar [gaeul x reader]

↳ this hasn't come out yet but i can't wait <3 the header is so so pretty & the summary has me so intrigued :) bc i just adore gaeul

KISS, KISS, I WANNA KISS. - @tbzloonar [hyejoo x reader fluff]

↳ you can likely alr tell just how cute this is from the title alone but im gonna say it again bc its adorable <3

LOST SUNSHINE - @haerinz [wonyoung x reader angst]

↳ this hanahaki au was one of the first gg fics i found on here && it's a true heartbreaker <3 would definitely recommend to anyone craving angst :D

SWEET WORDS - @itgetsquiet [ryujin x reader fluff]

↳ only recently discovered this fic && i still haven't finished it, but i started it and from what i've read so far, ik im gonna enjoy it :)

[watchoutforthefanfics]

alright gimme some of UR most cherished reddie headcanons!!

hiiiiiiiii

okay, okay

imma get into it

#1:

one of my faves is that Richie is like genuinely good at cooking.

Maggie Tozier put him into the kitchen to put his energy somewhere healthy, so he would help her with dinner like all the time. So he's good at it.

But, Richie doesn't do it often because it was like a family affair, and he's alone so he like doesn't really see the purpose of it. Hence, he eats shitty snacks and takeout.

On the opposite side of the spectrum, Eddie does not know how to cook. Like at all.

I imagine his Mom had complete control of his diet, and then Myra did the very same, so Eddie never really got the chance to try anything for himself.

UNTILLLL

When Eddie (inevitably) comes to live with Richie, Richie starts cooking again. Because it's not just him and they can EAT together!!!

Eddie can't believe his fucking eyes, because Richie's actually cooking! And it's good!!!

Anyway, long story short, Eddie learns how to cook from Richie, and they like make food together for dinner and stuff and it's cute and domestic and maybe they confess over boiling pasta idk-

#2:

Eddie, because he was so sheltered, is really fucking curious.

I've talked a few times in fics about this (once coining it Kaspbrak Curiosity), but the main idea is that Eddie so stifled he's like super eager to experience and understand shit.

So like maybe when they were kids, his mom told him that candy was terrible for you. Well, Eddie would ask for a piece of Richie's chocolate bar because he'd never had one before and he was curious.

And when Eddie forgets, he loses that so he just gets comfortable, stays in his own lane.

When everyone gets reunited, though, it comes back. But it's still like a childhood curiosity, the innocent like wonder of the world.

It's like hinged on the whole 'Eddie is brave' thing. Like Eddie is nervous and paranoid because that's how he was raised to be, but at his core, Eddie is brave and curious, and wants to know the bounds of the world. And so, so eager to learn!!!

I can't think of anymore rn, but those are my two faves.

So like picture Eddie wanting to try new shit and dragging Richie with him. The idea of Eddie picking up random hobbies for a few months just so he can know what it's like.

Richie walking into the living room and Eddie having like 5 succulents on the window seal. Eddie trying every cuisine in the nearby vicinity, and figuring out what he loves and hates. Eddie randomly having an obsession with chess and makes Richie play him all the time because he'dnever really learned how to play. Just really random shit that Eddie never really had the opportunity to explore.

In total, Eddie kinda goes on a midlife crisis and does a bunch of shit that he never got to do (typically dragging Richie along in some way).

[fahbev]

Hi! Saw you jumped on the tim hate train, welcome to the club! Aplarently you're Damian fan, which is good bc hes also one of the characters who's hit by tim's..woobification? Victimization(???) while simultaneously being the bestest, most competent batfam member. You Damian fans honestly have my respect for the pure amount of shit Damian gets because of tim.

hi lmao. Thanks xD. I usually try to keep all my negativity off of the internet, but last night I was going the anti Tim drake tag bc my frustration was flaring up. At first i was collecting posts by liking them instead of rb, then I was replying, and then at some point... “Fuck it. I want this on my blog.”

(This is gonna be a ramble btw, I don’t care abt making a good post rn.)

I used to be fine with Tim! I think the whole thing was a lot less prominent in the dpxdc fandom bc DANNY was the fan favorite/community elected woobie, but then I kinda moved out and... well. It still took awhile for this issue to seep in bc those Tim fans (you know the ones) are certainly a minority, but I just don’t think you can be a Damian fan for longer than a few months without getting frustrated.

Nowadays I refuse to read anything tagged with any variation of “Tim Drake angst” that features the batfam. Timkon fics are usually just fine though.

Actually— recently? Shit’s been bothering me so bad that I don’t wanna risk reading fics that have Tim in the first relationship tag at all. He’s gotta at most be in the second one. Ship fics are again an exception, but I don’t tend to seek out ship fics much anyway.

But, like I said, I usually keep it to myself. Every time i catch myself venting in the tags I either screenshot the tags and delete, or I delete and retype them. I put them into a private notes document. I also journal in there a lot instead of posting it.

That document is pretty long.

I do wanna say that there’s nothing wrong with what tim fans are doing. It is fun to woobify your fave. It’s fun to prop them up and tear others down and make everything about your blorbo and it is harmless. I do it too (usually in my daydreams). It’s a fantasy, and that’s what fanfiction is for. People who act like it’s “problematic” are wrong. That doesn’t mean it’s not annoying. Because it is. It’s annoying as all fuck.

Also wanna mention that I once read a damian fic that like... started off with some delicious whump, but then it turned into a whole Damian pity party and it guilt tripped all his friends and family. Damian IS my blorbo and I couldn’t read that. I didn’t even know who Maps was at the time but it seemed so bizarre to throw her under the bus. Anyway I feel like that’s what a quite large portion of Tim fic is like except a bit less extreme.

I used to tell myself that “ohhh it’s just a rivalry. I’m sure Tim fans get the same shit in reverse all the time” but I literally NEVER see it in the other direction and spend the most of my time in Damian circles. The only time I see tim hate from damian fans is frustration at those particular fans in response to it or in response to favoritism of authors.

I mean i saw a good chunk of it last night, but what else can I expect from the anti tim drake tag?

It’s actually funny how most of the stuff in anti tags is polarized hate shitting on the character with a lot of bad takes, but in tims anti tag it was almost exclusively frustration from Damian and Jason fans, and usually pretty mild takes. Also people calling Tim boring.

Ngl, Idk much about Jason. I’m familiar with his fanon, but the only comic i’ve read that featured him in a major way was Gotham War. I don’t know him well, and I don’t have too much interest in him. However, I hate “Jason falls over in guilt and kisses Tim’s fingers begging for forgiveness” type posts in solidarity. It’s yucky.

Anyway, I didn’t even mean to get on this anti tim train you speak of, It just sorta leaked out of my vent doc. Don’t expect me to keep posting about it.

but also... don’t not expect it. It might happen.

Even so, my dms are absolutely open for Timothy Drake related frustration! I’m pretty tired of being nice to him.

[swordsmans]

i came out to have a good time and im honestly feeling sooooo attacked right now (we are holding hands and screaming together)

as for progress pics!! i dont have any glamor shots because like all of these are wips but uhhh the perona notepads are gonna be a perona version of these with a red binding compound

the sheets are pressing under some weights rn so i think that counts as progress! (and the new g5 versions have a light purple background instead of white, you can kinda see a test print in the corner lol)

the notebook im sewing is a pink/purple/silver cover version of this one i finished last night! its tri-color on the inside like the one i made for ozo because ive got a lot of fill leftover and it was pretty fun

aaannnnd dani has already seen the syw corpse notebook so i dont mind sharing that haha. what basically happened is i messed up the back cover of her book? but didnt want to waste the material, so i ripped it up and made some minor changes to the cover, then rebuilt it as a notebook!! so its basically a hardcover version of the paperback sketchbooks im making lol. this means i have to start the actual book's cover from scratch though [[wailing]]

and the ao3 stickers look like this, i just need to print more because i stick them in my planner when my friends and fave authors post new fics and there have been so many updates lately ive run out!! (T^T) (this is a very good problem to have lmao)

i dont have any updates on the PP typeset because id get sucked in the minute i opened it i think lol you see why i am in crisis?? i want to be doing all of these things at once. and also start 6544233 new projects because i currently have three more textblocks sewn and painted of other fics that i also need to give time and attention to

truly i live in a hell of my own making (its awesome)

[t-rina]

12 What's the funniest or craziest AU idea you've ever come up with?

22 Give us a headcanon for T'rina

12. what's the funniest or craziest AU idea you've ever come up with?

oh, i'm not sure i actually ever came up with a funny or crazy au idea? lemme think about that one.

Ok i thought about it. Since i'm super duper into disco rn you'll understand that i stick to that show for a bit as well.

A while ago i thought about what would have happened if Mirror!Georgiou and T'Rina had met and... in some strange way i think it would work out? Them together would be pretty much a crack ship but i got kinda obsessed with the idea of them meeting. Two powerful women, both *very* different characters, but both teasing, very self assured, hot&badass? Like yeah, that would have been great!

The AU therefore would be "what if mirror!georgiou would have stayed in the prime timeline and met the president of ni'var"

22. give us a headcanon for T'Rina.

why yes i would love to talk a bit about my fave disco character <3

I headcanon that T'Rina is a plant killer. Idk, the idea is just hilarious to me? Now I don't mean that she kills every plant she touches, but she either means wayyy to well (overwaters) or idk, she accidentally tips them over, and they always end up looking a bit ragged looking and whenever Saru comes over he's like "Rinnah, what the *hell* happened here???" and she's like "Ashal, whatever do you mean, I have had this plant for almost three weeks and it is still thriving" (thriving in this case means it has stagnated completely in it's growth, the roots have began to rot and some of the leaves are beginning to become yellow).

I wrote a fic once about her trying to frantically take care of the plant Saru gave her but kinda failing and having to ask for help again. After that it works out great, so yeah, she can keep plants alive if she is being told precicely how to care for them (i.e. she doesn't forget about them she's just abd at reading plants i guess). Saru leaves her in charge of his office exactly once. For two days. And never again.

thank you so much for the asks!

fandom ask game

[itsnotmystic]

this may come as an absolute surprise /s

but. cTechno and cPhil. philza in general really. emeraldduo and also just whatever the hell Phil is doing

also chayanne and tallulah?

ohhh im absolutely vibrating rn. all 4 of my faves lmao.

Techno for sure, he was the first mcyt I watched in 2021 when I was getting back into minecraft and all that. Unfortunately, since he passed, cTechno kinda ends with dsmp so there's only so much canon I can work with yk

But yea, I used to not actually know too much about Philza tbh, not until half way through the qsmp/earlier this year even. Like yeah I was into his dsmp character, but once they started getting his hardcore dieties involved in qsmp is when I really started finding him interesting! It helps that ccPhil is commissioning 3 animatics for his characters lore, so yk, cPhilza content in 2024. (ill be so real, when qsmp started i was following ccwil and that's how I came to love Tallulah, and since he was gone all the time, I watched Phil for Tallulah which led to me liking him and chayanne as well. since I don't follow ccwil anymore, all my attention got shifted to ccPhil lmao)

AND YEAH CHAY AND LULLAH!! I got accepted to write a short fic about them for a qsmp zine and ended up writing 3.4k. They're babies. I love them. So much

[boxwinebaddie]

— COULD IT BE????

U-UNCLE NIIINA!!!

IS. THAT.../YOU/? </3

tw for mild body horror, semi-graphic medical talk

*reaches my kenny girl hand up thru the dirt by my grave

& shoots the wink, finger gun, peace sign, wave combo*

HELLOOOO, MY LOVES! />o</ <333

( i'll make a bigger post later; swearsies. )

but where’s uncle nina?...Long Story Short?

i am seriously dreading having to go to the hospital for...the THIRD FUCKING TIME, so my diaHAGnosis hasn't been officially proven,

but trust me...juuuust trust me...

*is somewhere between a laugh, sigh, scream and cry*

i am about 95% sure....

tHAT A CHILD W/ NASTY DISGUSTIN GERM COVERED HANDS GAVE ME

A FUCKING PARASITE!???

wheeeew!~ yayayay! sAuR AwESomE!

i am...having So Much Fun! <3 xx

anyways, in case i croak, just wanted to pop in from the trenches to say a real quick, but quantifiably large and overtly resounding

THANK YOU to...

my rant park girls, ofc, for enduring my britney spears mentie bs in the chat, my psychosis and v obnoxious 'needs to be carried thru life' complaining/suffering on the reg ( i cried every single day for the past...almost week? because of how scared and sad i’ve been. ;-; )

anyone who sent me an in character/headcannon/plot question the past couple of days bc, other than the girlies, it was the only source of real joy and enrichment i have felt while being scared...for my life. thank...you. Seriously. like y'all still care abt my fic? wowza!! o/u/o

( regarding memes, soz, they might not super exciting, i’m only doing lil spef HC ones rn & got a lil hyperfixated on rae, so i am doing that one abt his height / fave fruit.

<333 my lovely emo fruit salad celebpretty boy. c: )

BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY OF ALL, i just wanted to say thank you to ANYONE WHO EXPRESSED CONCERN ABOUT MY WELL BEING OR SAID THEY MISSED ME OR WERE WORRIED ABOUT ME!!!!

'cause haha!!! you were NOT wrong, concern was not misplaced at all! I HATE THIS SCARY NIGHTMARE FUEL CHILDREN CONTAGION! :(

istg, my face has swollen up shrunken down, been every color, the pressure in my ears and nose and face is so bad that i feel like i am i an airplane rn....in my bedroom, every er dr. told me i had a sunburn and was an idiot, like actually king, i am green not red! get a real job!

siiiiiiiiigh...i just...:c i’ve never felt weaker, more miserable, more afraid, more UGLY and more lost in my entire life...

but i am grateful to have been found by readers and human beings as lovely as yourselves. i miss you. i love you. i'll try to be in touch as much as i can, but it will be touch and go, my body is a body bag rn :/

thank you for fighting the good fight, my darlings. whatever you are going through, KEEP FUCKING GOING. this is not the end. you are so much stronger than things that want to make you weak.

( i'm not very good at practicing what i preach, but ngl, kinda sick, literally, but i have basically been my own emergency makeshift whumpshot this past week and it has been gNARLY. like i have been...very scared. lmao. i am...still scared, but i'm gonna be okay. )

ANYWAYS ALL THIS TO SAY:

from what hurts or harms you,

past, present and future....

I HOPE YOU HEAL.

-sickfic body horror whumple nina <3

[seattlesellie]

just wanna say u have my 1000% support takin a break from writing to process with the genocide going on in palestine. ur writing always feels very real and human, and i kinda believe that to a certain extent u can understand someone’s heart thru their writing, and so im def not surprised that you’re staying in touch with your humanity and feeling the feelings rn. im right there with u, personally taking a lot of comfort in linking up with organizing groups in my area cause it’s too much to process alone! ((and I’d be remiss not to mention that im revisiting my fave works of urs when I need a brain break)) u don’t have to answer this just wanted to add a lil voice of solidarity to ur inbox :) 🇵🇸

you’re such a lovely human being for this kind message and for spreading awareness on the subject this almost made me cry? i wish i replied as soon as you sent this but it got swallowed down in my inbox! like you said it just felt very wrong (for me personally) to write during these times. it still feels slightly odd cause you know how you wake up & immediately check twitter to see if the journalists you follow are still alive? then like you can’t stop thinking about them for hours on end? and you go on instagram/tumblr and everything seems “normal” even though it’s not? it’s just such a mindfuck. nevertheless i’m so happy you find some comfort in my fics 💗

just another reminder to support BDS, because as much as our marching and speaking out matter, taking actual actions — boycotting, hold such a greater power. none of us are free until palestine is 🍉

[saetoshis]

CLOSING OUT THE YEAR!

[‹ A MUTUAL APPRECIATION POST ›]

[‹ ABOUT ›] i started this new blog in around september, and we already have over 1k followers and sooo many lovely mutuals from not only this account but my past one! and i adore you all SO MUCH, this is just me spewing my love and thoughts into one giant post 🤗 // if i forgot you PLEASE let me know and i'll add you :') i have soo many mutuals i need to keep track sobs!

[‹ EXTRAS ›] if you can, listen to the song! i just think it rlly ties into how i feel from a musical standpoint sob! im a music nerd excuse me ahksla

@kavehtion

MY SWEET VLYNN ! i not only adore your writing but also your formatting, it's so pleasing to the eye :') i find your energy soothing and bright - your confidence radiates to me and i always absolutely adore seeing you on dash! we don't interact too much but i hope we can more in the future :)

@heartnagi

LOLA LOLA LOLA BABY ! you've been here since diaphanoso snifle i adore you sooo much ! everything you post i go "that's so real" in my head, i adore your creativity and you have such a strong sense of morals which i admire :') i'm soo glad to have gotten close to u ! let's keep thirsting over aether and each other more next year ehehe

@zorotits

LINAAA even tho we are new moots i literally love ur energy on dash.. it's kinda bright and chaotic and SOO funny ! your theme actually makes me wanna take a bite out of ur acc if that makes sense jaksdla BUT i legit adore your energy (esp in tags omfg they make me die) and hope we can interact n thirst sooo much more next year :)

@touyyes

BAKI OMGFGKJF baki i stg. you make me LOSE MY MIND every time you post.. it's either making me choke from laughing so hard or actually dying from the MM M MM OH SO YUMMY thirsts ! you had me at toji n i was like i have to follow RN. BUT STOP i adore ur energy it's like bright chaos it makes me feel SOOO FULL OF GOOD ENERGY :) let's thirst over toji in jjk s2 next year :P

@dilu3

MY SWEET LALAA ! your fics literally bring me to my KNEESSS i adore the way you write especially bachira, n you're always putting me on to new chars and animes like hellsing :') i love your creativity and how you're always thinking of creative blog names n themes i adore them all !! gimme even more chars to thirst over in 2023 :)

@510hz

ARES i dont think u understand how much i adore seeing u on dash like. even the controversial posts i'm like "stop thats so real" like everything u say i agree with. the energy is like.. chaotic chill I LOVE IT it feeds my soul :') i cant wait for more moshares interactions n maybe irl eheheheh :)

@hystix

cadie dont get me started. HALAHAKAKA i literally love u like i am in love w you :') you're my bright lil light on dash n i swear when i see u in notifs im like "I CAUGHT U !" you're such a like.. precious soul to me i just wanna hug u snifle !! you remind me of warm hugs yesyes that is ur energy to me!! my sweet cadie snifle I MUST SEE U MORE ON GENSHIN N DASH NEXT YEAR :)

@tinie

ARLO ! SOGLO ! BUNLO ! omgongog you might not know but i swear u have an influence on me ! your energy is so like .. calm but attractive if that makes sense snifle ! the 'nodnodnod' n use of 'soggy' has captured me i swear ! now im always saying soggy ! but i rlly love seeing u on dash n ur like.. my biggest scara association if that makes sense ! i wanna see evennn more scarlomouche all 2023 :')

@nymphoheretic

MY BABY MY WIFE my BEAAAUTIFUL WIFE ! nymph / kk / kirei my absolute babe. my beloved since diaphanoso .. my biggest kyo n gyo n tengen thirst partner ehehe ! your energy is like omgog warm and chaotic I ADORE U ! every time i rewatch kny n see kyo im like 'yeah that's my wife's man' ehehekekej I HOPE TO THIRST OVER KNY EVENNN MORE WITH U ! one day ill finish bleach n catch up to all ur faves :)

@blueparadis

PARADIS ! omgomg i swear we haven't interacted much sobs BUT I WANNA MORE ! you give me suuuch calm sweet energy on dash :') I ALWAYS ADOREEE your formatting your brain is just like WHOAA so special so creative ! i can't wait to see more pretty colors on dash from u ehehe AND HOPEFULLY EVEN MORE INTERACTIONS IN 2023 !

@kunizk

ZENNN ZENZEN ! omg we rlly have not interacted much but stop. i adore ur navi SO MUCH I WANNA EAT IT ? like does that make sense? prob not BUTASLASAL STOP STOPP. i love ur interactions w toji's rp blog i love seeing just like. no shits given layin everything out ahaklaa BUT ! i hope to see more feral shit on dash from u AND MORE INTERACTIONS TOGETHER NEXT YEAR :)

@nymphoheratic

KATTAKSDHKAL KAT MY BABY ! my lil genshin buddy snifle ! i not only adore ur writing but i just ADORE U ! you're my lil kit kat sob :') i hope tumblr fkn unflags u someday HAKAKA it is ridiculous how much i miss u here ! but im glad i have u on genshin n hopefully we can share more lil leaks n show off tcg n showcases to each other next year ehehkeeke !

@babiefwuit

my love my light my literal best friend :') I SRSLY DONT KNOW WHAT ID DO WITHOUT YOU TO TALK TO :(:(((:(:(( nana bun HAKDAL grammy bun i miss u SOOO BAD ! WE NEED TO CATCH UP RN. like HOP ON DISC RN ! i am kissing u my sweet, soulful-energied baby! i could cry ! ahdkalsda BUT LETS MEET UP AGAIN N THIRST OVER GYOMEI AGAIN IN 2023 !

@itoshi-s

OMFGHKLASDKLAAAA ZARI STOP. bro it's been like 2 days of being mutuals but STOP I LOVE SEEING U ON DASH I LOSE MY MIND ! your energy omfg. it's irreplaceable i stg ! the feral thirsts, the thoughts u put in my tinie head ! ill go insane one day I SWEAR ADKASL im gonna bite u 24/7 in 2023 :')

@boyfrwenz

JEM MY SWEET THING ! you are my biggest daichi association ever ! every time i see anything haikyuu/daichi related im like STOP I WONDER IF JEM HAS SEEN THIS OMG ! you have like calm chaotic but also bright energy snifle ! i hope to see more daichi fics n interactions in 2023 :))

@ohsatori

omg HALEYYEHKALDSA stop stop ! i adore how you write not only tendou but all characters snifle ! your theme caught my eye so hard n im sooo glad i clicked follow sob ! you are such a sweet, bright soul on dash to me !! you also put me on SOO much good haikyuu art i adore it :') i cannot WAIT for more tendou fics n art n interactions next year :P

@haruchiyos

azrael my beloved my pretty thing ! u get me like u just GET ME yk? i feel like we're aligned or smth ! every time i interact with you im just thinking "mm m mm azrael gets it!" I MISS SEEING U ON DASH I NEED MORE AZRAEL THOUGHTS ! im yelling at yukimiya to give u sum kisses for the new year :P

@tinymaru

REINEAKJSDKLA reine my baby. I SWEAR U DONT UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH RESPECT N ADMIRATION I HAVE FOR UR TALENT ! you're such a sweet soul too i can't help but smile when i see "MOSHI" randomly in my disc notifs asdklalad !! you have such a gifted, creative, beautiful mind to me ! i cannot wait for more art n selfship drawings n silly lil dms in 2023 :)

@sailewhoremoon

SOSAAAA every time i see u on dash legit love sosa plays in my head ! your energy omfg it cannot be replicated. it's SOOOO GOOD and the way u reblog asks n check up on ur moots is SOO SWEET ILL CRY ! youre the sweetest brightest lil light on this app :') I NEED MORE FERAL UNCENSORED SOSA THOUGHTS ASAP ! i hope to see evennn more next year eheeheke

@dearbraus

FAWN FAWN FAWN BABY ! i adore ur acc sm omfgklf i also LOVE that u post abt lesbian culture n ur lil thoughts on genshin women esp lisa ! you're such a strong presence n it's sooo like... energetically warm to me !! i just adore seeing ur reblogs n thoughts spewed out on dash ! i hope we can interact EVEN MORE IN 2023 ! kisskiss to u :)

@thetempleofnyx

omg jen ASKALLAAAA my baby my baby omg ! my sweet thing i treasure you SO MUCH ! your feral unhinged uncensored thoughts on dash r sooo sooo contagious i stg ! every time i see u horny post im like oh. OH OHHH oh. OHH yeah oh right oh! HAKHSA but i srsly love ur sweet n caring energy you are one of the just most.. precious people ive met here ! i hope for more thirsts n interactions n LOVE with you next year !

@eremikan

MARI. i see like everything u put out on dash n i think to myself "thats so real" like ur brain is sooo intriguing to me.. IDK HOW TO EXPLAIN IT ! you have like neutral chaotic energy and im always like "i wanna peek in ur brain even more" ! but i will legit NEVER forget that satosugu fic you wrote where getou was gone and it was reader + satoru and getou like came to them in a dream sorta situation?? OMG THAT FIC CHANGED MY LIFE it was my first time reading an angsty fic ahdkala but i LOVED IT ! but anyways that was long omgomg i cant wait to see more peeks of ur brain this next year :P

@festive

VIVA VIVAAAA your energy on dash actually makes me smileomgomg i think to myself "viva n cyno" all the time like u are sooo associated with him in my brain ! i love love LOVE your writing style sm, n the cyno content is TOP tier to me ! youre so funny your energy is just so bright to me ! but i hope to see even moreee viva n cyno next year n hopefully even more interactions ! :)

@sugies

MY BABY JUJU ! omgomg every time i see jjk or getou art im like "WAIT HAS JUJU SEEN THIS?" you're like the sweetest lil bean to me ! i adoreeee adore you n MISS U ! WE NEED TO GET BACK INTO JJK ANALYSIS AGAIN ! i miss talking abt the chapters w you ! i am giving u a warm squishy hug rn cuz i miss u soooo much ! i hope for more jjk/getou brainrot n thirsts in 2023 :)

@rczc

ZEHR MY LOVE MY LIGHT MY BABY ! i miss you SOOO MUCH STOP ! you are the fkn funniest person on this app i am SOO SERIOUS ! your energy is so warm and chaotic and the feral unhinged tags FEED MY SOUL ! you make me choke from laughing so hard i will cry ! i miss u zehr bear ! i am hugging u virtually :)

@milkyybuns

OMGOGM DAE ! my tengen brainrot buddie ehehehe every time i see itto or tengen art/fics im like stop it rn where is dae ! im falling back into my tengen phase again so expect a lot in ur inbox ehehhe ... you have such sweet energy on dash like seeing u in my inbox makes me SMILE SO HARD ! i adore u baby n i hope for amazing things AND SOME MORE TENNIE BRAINROT NEXT YEAR !

@sugr

KELS KELS ! u feed me soooo well with the jjk art reblogs n haikyuu / jjk fics ! i will die adkasladh you have calm n bright energy to me ! i associate u sooo hard with yuuji (prob from the prev. username hehe) ! but you remind me of the feeling of hot coffee on a cold day if that makes sense.. like soothing n cozy :') I CANT WAIT FOR MORE FICS N INTERACTIONS THIS NEXT YEAR ! kisskiss for u kels !

@munsonsins

ABBYYADHJADKAD stop i miss u so much ! even tho i dont know shit about marvel or that stuff?? i will always read anything u write cuz i ADOREEE IT SM ! whenever i see u pop into my inbox w a lil meme i smile soo hard eeek ! i hope school is treating u well n ur doing AMAZING ! n if not i hope that next year brings u the amazing vibes that you deserve :) i love u abby ehekeke

@ghxstic

NYMPH NYMPH my kny food distributor ehehekee i stg my fav muzan fic is that muzan + koku fic u wrote from WAAAY back when ! i miss u sosososo much ! i hope life is treating u well ! i miss interacting so bad ahakalaa !! im giving u 365 kisses so every day of next year is a good one :)

@pcwer

bruh omg xel i literally think u are the funniest person i have ever met in my entire life HAKAKAKAAA like. i genuinely lose my shit every time u post ESP ABT KISHIBE ILL DIE RN THINKING ABT IT ! but you have such warm n happy energy it makes my soul feel soooo full ! i cant wait for more WEIRD kishibe thoughts n yummy thirsts next year :P

@r-oronoa

OMGOMG APOLLO my baby pollo ! i am sooo glad to have u as a mutual stop omgog ! you have like omg. the most precious energy ive ever felt thru a screen HASKDAAA you're so warm and inviting and bright it makes me feel right at home !! your fics are so amazing and the way u push out content is so admirable ! i adore u and i hope for even moreee interactions in 2023 :')

@suyacho

SNOW OMFAKSDJKALAAA you and xel are like.. the most ridiculously hysterical duo ive ever experienced in my life ! interacting w you guys on diaphanoso was INSANE i loved the kny brainrot sm ! you're the sweetest little precious soul ive ever met ! ill cry thinking abt it omgoggn i love playing genshin w you and teaching u all kinds of things ! i cant wait to play n interact even more !!!

@saneminx

CHERRY MY BELOVED MI BEBECITA ! MI CORAZON ! i love your energy so much like your sense of justice and bright, loud + confident personality makes me feel SOO GOOD i admire u a lot ! you always feed me with sooo many kny thirsts i ADORE U ! i am hugging u soooososo tight and i hope 2023 is AMAZING FOR U !

@the-witch-of-one-piece

VAL OMGLAKSDAAAA VAL VAL ! i see u writing bleach i promise one day ill watch it all n catch up with you :') your energy is so positive and loving, i can feel it through the screen i swear ! you make me feel right at home, and i love that we've stayed mutuals through my blog switch and after around a year ! im sending all my good energy to you for this next year :'))

@getoswhore

BRUH AHKLAAAA BELLA GTFO i love you. everything u put out on dash makes me fucking DIE LAUGHING STOP ! youre like one of my most precious mutuals from diaphanoso omgogm you've influenced me to be more confident n loud on dash hhehehee I ADORE U ! i cannot wait for more belloshi interactions n thirsts in 2023 :)

@donvampiro

DONDONDON I WILL CRY RN ! you are soo close to my heart my beloved ! if i could speak french id put a cute little french term of endearment but alas i am. not there yet :') snifle you make me feel SOOO safe and warm. i adore your heart and your preciousness it makes me emotionalahdkaaaa but i cannot wait for more don + moshi time this next year :')

@sleepy3

SLEEPY SLEEPS MY BABY ! you make me smile so hard when i see u in my inbox, you're always putting me onto new chars and it has me GASPINGAJSKAA i love your energy it's soft, like a warm hug and sleepy cuddles !! i cannot wait for more interactions n PLSPLSSS gimme some more chars to thirst over with you next yearhehehe

@tsunderedoctor

PURPLE my baby my love ! my mutual since diaphanoso ! i adore your sensitivity and brightness, youre such a precious person to me and i just genuinely admire your soul ! i loveee the law art reblogs you put out, they feed me sooo well :') and your emergency requests i adore so much! you are such a beautiful person to me ! ill cry omgogm ! but i hope the new year brings you nothing but good things ! you deserve it all :))

@4izawas

NEPPY NEP ! my bf since diaphanoso :') i adore your bright n confident energy SO MUCH ! your big biggg heart makes me soo so easily comfy and happy with you !! you have so much confidence and i swear it's contagious :) i cant wait for more genshin + moshtune interactions this next year ! i am sending u all my thirsty n positive energy !!

@garoujo

BROOOAKAKAKAA stop stop. dont get me started ill tear up ! emmie oomfghfgf i literally am in love with u ! youre my best friend stop stop ! you make me feel so safe and comfortable like i rlly dont feel that way with a lot of ppl ! you have such a bright heart and just warm energy ITS SO CONTAGIOUS. ur so contagious im sniffling ! we must have more emmoshi interactions ! i am giving u all my motivation n energy for 2023 :')

@vilsoo

JES OMGOMG ! i swear youve been sticking around w me for SOOO LONG like almost 2 years?? i think?? but SOB your energy is so bright to me i adore talking to u sm :') there's always tea to spill n its sooo investinghahakak but i cannot wait for more memories n interactions w you ! you are my go-to for fnaf fics ALWAYS ill always put people onto you when they ask for jjk / fnaf recs ehehheeh

2022 SAETOSHIS. thank you all for the memories, craziness, love n hugs! i adore u all! // all credits for music go to animenz on youtube, song performed: kimiiro signal - saekano: how to raise a boring girlfriend OP

[chameliyun]

20 Q's for Fic Writers

thanks for the tag @spacejammie-eimmajecaps!

How many works do you have on ao3? Officially 8, but I have one on anon and one currently unrevealed in a fic exchange

What's your total ao3 word count? 61,996

What fandoms do you write for? So far I've written for Death Note, Tangled the Series, Avatar: The Last Airbender, and Haikyuu, plus a couple of crossovers. Haikyuu is definitely my main rn though

What are your top five fics by kudos? #1: Frosting and Freckles: 69 (nice) #2: Draw Me Near: 39 #3: [embarrassing anon fic]: 35 #4: Varian Is Not a Wizard: 25 #5: Midnight Coda: 21

Do you respond to comments? Yeah, I love to! I don't get a lot so they always make me happy :)

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? probably the anon fic sdfsk but other than that, Midnight Coda is kinda bittersweet because of what happens later

What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? hmm idk but the sappiest is definitely Frosting and Freckles

Do you get hate on fics? Not so far, thankfully! I don't think I have a big enough readership for that haha

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? I have not; not sure what kind it would be if I did

Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? I love writing crossovers! A PJO/HP crossover was actually what got me into fanfic. Unfortunately most of them are merely concepts or abandoned (for now), but as for crazy, I think my Lunar Chronicles/PJO one is the craziest in terms of how the plot grew out of control from a simple "what if these two characters interacted" to "I could rewrite most of this series," which is why I got stuck and put it on hiatus lol but I do want to get back to it someday. Maybe once I finish my other active crossover

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not to my knowledge

What's the longest you've spent working on one fic? And the shortest? Uhhh well if we count "working on" as "having it in the back of mind to get to but haven't worked on in months," probably Sent from the Heavens lol. If not, then Varian Is Not a Wizard (just over two years since I published the first chapter). Shortest is definitely Midnight Coda, since I wrote that pretty much in a day iirc

Have you ever co-written a fic before? No, but it sounds like it could be fun!

What's your all-time favorite ship? From all fandoms? Dude I have no idea how to narrow that down. Best I can give you is my current fave is Tsukkiyama from Haikyuu

What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? Probably my "Leo Valdez ends up in the ATLA world" one :sob: It never made it past the word doc and about three pages of story and I haven't looked at it in like two years

What are your writing strengths? I like to think I'm pretty good at dialogue and grammar/spelling

What are your writing weaknesses? Everything else (jk). I am awful at describing scenes/settings; I get bored writing them so I don't put as much effort in as I should haha. I also tend to ramble and use passive voice too much

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? I haven't done it, but I think it's fine as long as it fits the context

First fandom you wrote for? Published: Avatar: The Last Airbender. Unpublished: Percy Jackson

Favorite fic you've written? I think it's still Bent Out of Shape. It's so niche, but I had an idea and I executed it, and I'm proud of what I accomplished. Although once I finish Varian Is Not a Wizard, that might take the top slot.

No-pressure tagging: @supermarine-silvally @starrynightarchive @litterateur97 @palant1r @soreiya @lilac-writes @oloreandil @kandybarkreepshow @ellegamgee and anyone else who wants to!

[rosesradio]

Choose violence: 2, 6, 19 (for PJO/HOO/TOA)

2.) a compelling argument for why your fave would never top or bottom

i know i’m gonna sound like a hypocrite rn because i did write a (rather long, college aged before people come into my inbox 👁️👁️) valdangelo smut, but in writing that i realized i don’t really see them as a smutty couple. gray-ace icons fr

that being said i still have some Thoughts. and smutty dynamics and the reasonings behind them are a very nuanced topic, but. leo would not be a top—I just don’t think he has the confidence or feels the need to. and nico would not be a bottom, mostly because, while he would need to be very trusting in sex, he wouldn’t want to put that much direction in another person. i think nico would be a power bottom and leo a service top, that way nico can kinda call the shots and leo can take care of him while still kinda taking charge in the physical sense, if that makes sense. the dynamic works to me

6.) which ship fans are the most annoying?

…solangelo fans. i’m sorry 😭 i love my solangelo mutuals and followers, y’all are the best. and even though i dislike the ship i respect that there’s potential in it for others. but i mean the fans that just live & breathe Incorrect Quotes and see no flaws with tsats and want to harvest the souls of people who see anything wrong with their ship or the canon content…it’s a little wild 👀

19.) you're mad/ashamed/horrified you actually kind of like...

i’m actually not really ashamed of any of my tastes! i have my preferences and like to curate a space of people that all respect each other, it’s pretty neat! the only thing i’m embarrassed about is not speaking out sooner about my love of dark fic in the pjo fandom—it’s a big space but if anyone gives me trouble I’ll block them. it’s very freeing ✨

[sparatus]

Sparatus? 🙂

🥺👉👈

Sexuality Headcanon: painfully bisexual. somebody please stop surrounding this old man with hot people his heart can't take it. also very much not xeno in the slightest

Gender Headcanon: turian gender stuff is complicated and doesn't fit into human binaries, so while he's generally understood to be and is fine with being perceived as a cis man because he's perfectly happy with the body he was born with, a closer approximation is masculine nonbinary, just... not the way humans understand nb to be

A ship I have with said character: i mean. [gestures vaguely to entire internet presence] do i even have to specify teia at this point.

aside from the obvious, sparatus/quentius is also a fave, i do so love boss and loyal dragon dynamics, and the two of them are that plus a flip side out of work where they're just best mean girl friends hanging out being catty old men together. plus for bad end it makes it so much juicier that not only was sparatus quentius's friend but also a sometimes-lover, bad end hurts but it's so so deliciously messy

plus also @thetrashbagswasteland put sparatus/desolas in my head and it bops around from time to time, just like, suave but chaotic military man with the personality of a mob boss "you wanna fuck me so bad it makes you stupid" vs prickly by-the-book law boy "i hate that you're actually as charming as you think you are you charismatic asshole" i think it would be fun okay someday ill write it teia and abrudas can also get in on it for fun or they can bang on the side it's fine

A BROTP I have with said character: sparatus & quentius, for reasons listed above. the more i dabble around the more sparkyteia and quentilea are becoming just a platonic polypile, oopsie, they're all good friends. also quite fond of sparatus & saren, because saren is very well-trusted and the council's golden boy and not every spectre is going to have shepard's experience with the council so it only makes sense for saren to have that sort of loyal right hand kinda dynamic with sparky. sparatus & valern is also fun for my usual political intrigue reasons but we don't have time to get into the complicated bullshit fueling the turian-salarian alliance rn

A NOTP I have with said character: sparatus/shepard, for reasons i should hope are obvious by now. guys idk how to explain this but sometimes characters just hate you without secretly wanting to fuck you. he has legitimate criticisms of shepard and ill die on this hill, there's no ust he isn't into you and mad about it he just doesn't like your fucking attitude. and you can't convince me your shepard somehow turns it around into genuine love, i don't fucking believe you, it's ooc some characters will simply never grow to truly Like you more than respecting your ability and that's fucking okay and normal

also sparatus/saren, because while i adjust saren's age in my work to bring him up to 70 in me1 (and closer to sparky, 76) the main works i know of for that ship have sparatus more than twice his age (in his 60s while saren was EIGHTEEN) and taking advantage of the age gap and saren's emotional turmoil after his brother's death to groom him into the perfect partner, which... oh my god no. and it was presented as romantic! as saren's first real love before nihlus!! i am calling the police!! and pretty much everyone ive seen who talks about that ship got it from that fic so. yeah that author is my parasocial enemy

A random headcanon: despite how closely they have to work together, and sparky being a prosecutor pre-politics (thus allegedly on the side of the cops), he and pallin have a rather... antagonistic relationship, mostly because of how sparky responds to pallin's complaints about spectres ("i'll let them know" which usually means nothing will be done and the spectres will continue treating civil misdemeanors and traffic violations like a game) but also because sparky himself has personal beef with like 7 different prominent cops, is from a "fuck the cops they're imperial shills we can police ourselves" background, and is so so good at being pedantic and annoying when he's feeling petty which is any time pallin isn't talking about an actual serious issue. he wants pallin to stop bothering him about traffic stops. pallin wants to fuck the smug look off his face. they're not allowed to have face-to-face meetings without quentius present because they WILL go straight to childish squabbling.

General Opinion over said character: he's my grandpa. he's Me. nobody in this fandom deserves him y'all need to remove the main character pov blinders and think about shit from his perspective and stop just assuming he's racist and stupid because he tells you no. the man has his position for a reason, and if you listen to what he's actually saying he's DEEPLY empathetic and concerned with how the public at large will be affected, he fucking cares about people it's canon it's canon it's CANON he literally goes behind his colleagues' backs to try to help you save palaven and stop the war right away that's not what a selfish heartless bureaucrat who only cares about his own small circle does i have ESSAYS dammit

.... oops i care about this old man So Much

send me a character

[canayams-art]

the immortality concept in tgcf is always interesting to think about, especially with the age range that the human mind cannot really comprehend... but maybe it's best for me not to think too much about it at midnight when i have uni early in the morning 😞😭 there are a lot of thoughts tho

you described the dynamic i had in mind for them perfectly!! mq's way of showing care by scolding and nagging and teasing that at time could come out as a touch too sharp. lqq's of being loud when defending and engaging into banter but keeping it light and not taking the teasing too close to heart unless it comes to his morality stands. they just weirdly compliment one another, especially with the way you said lqq takes the spotlight on the stage while mq is more "behind the curtain" type when dealing with things. you're so right, thinking about them makes me deranged as well

i do feel like the gods would be more vocal about the dislike towards mq when he was still a young god, and yeah especially those 33. while mq we see is well respected, and still very much disliked and distrusted, it is mq of 800+ years of presence in the heavenly court, and i do think many would be tight lipped around him regarding whatever his business are. but thinking about the backlash he would be facing during their earlier years/ centuries of friendship, i think they would be more vocal about it, if a bit sneaky with the way they would talk considering mq's temper with fx and general reputation that has been following him. 🤔 and well... there's also the broom throwing thing that has been going on apparently :'))

and he would definitely be on the bigger receiving end of it than lqq, especially considering their backgrounds and what the heaven considers "right". while lqq may be considered naive, he is still a noble that technically belongs in a way mq never could in their eyes.

but lqq still not standing by the bullying, even during the 'fight' is ekejjejejeej especially because i lqq knows that bullying is wrong no matter who's at the receiving end and, parallel to the mulian situation, there would be no shielding behind the higher authority to make it stop, just a very straightforward way to handle it. and i feel like mq, even if he is somewhat even struggling to admit he's miserable without lqq, would feel extremely touched knowing the way lqq would handle it 🥹🥹

no shade at mulian, literally my fave ship ever! i talk about them so much to my friends i feel like all of our brains are fried at this point lol they can fit so much angst and there are honestly dozens of ideas for fics that would likely never see the light of the day but we have the hope cuz we're all delusional 😔✊

just the parallels between them make me absolutely crazy, especially since i always kinda pictured mq as a type to get particularly adopted by the idealistic "sunshine type" people around him and get dragged around while he scowls and acts like he doesn't enjoy it, and then eventually ending up genuinely liking them, no matter how much they would clash at times with their ideologies. xl, sqx, i have an ongoing rants about mq and qyz friendship every other week. kinda pissed off that i didn't remember lqq until recently but it's never too late to start the brainrot anyway

i also went and checked the extras qianqing interaction, and it was actually mq seeing that lqq was in an awkward position being both the victim and the culprit and trying to send him back to heaven (it was the extra chapter where xl felt pain bcs of the guoshi mask he melted into a key?? i only searched for their names so again i have no idea/) but that was enough to have me covering my mouth and squealing

no at this point i will have to write *something* about qianqing, it would literally eat at me alive if i don't. life is busy and hard rn, but it will have to be done in this lifetime 😭

Mq has always given me the sense that he seeks out people with more emotional freedom than he feels he has. He spends so much of his time showing restraint and being distant that whenever I read sections of the book where Fu Yao makes an appearance, I see the way he lets his personality come out more. Maybe choosing the name “Fu Yao” was (among other reasons) mq’s way of literally saying he’s giving himself more freedom.

So like— it makes sense that mq has a pattern of associating with people who express themselves so freely— even if he sometimes takes shots at those people (mostly fx but also occasionally xl). Lqq is entirely unrestrained in a way that’s familiar but still unique. He’s one of the few gods who would step in or stand up for another without any ulterior motives— there’s nothing lqq would want to gain by standing up for mq in their early years. Whether he’s still angry with mq or not— it’s the right thing to do and that’s enough for him.

Meanwhile I feel like mq hates feeling like he’s once again being seen to hide behind another prince for protection. Mq likes to be in control of his circumstances— even if he could ask for help.

“I don’t need anyone fighting my battles.”

“No— but someone should have your back.”

Maybe that’s what it is about them actually? Lqq is so quick to jump up and declare injustice that mq thinks lqq would be trying to shield him when lqq is actually trying to advocate for his better treatment. Lqq learned the importance of unity and he practiced it well before ascending, so his type of support might be less about defending mq personally and more about shaming the gods for not setting a better example. Maybe he doesn’t even give mq the option to hide behind him.

(Related note, I can’t help thinking this type of tension would rise if lqq caught mq throwing a broom or snapping it in half— like ofc lqq is still mad but ofc he’s gonna try and connect the dots— maybe he even heard some of the gods laughing about their “gifts” to the young General.)

But okay now I’m thinking about the extra you mentioned and oooooooo

Mq confronting lqq in the mortal realm and failing to convince him to return to heaven. It’s a side of lqq mq has never seen. He’s not driven by a sense for justice anymore, now lqq wants revenge— maybe mq tells him that. Maybe it only angers lqq more. Either way, lqq doesn’t return.

(I actually have a similar scenario in my brain between lqq and newly-mortal pei xiu, which was actually the idea that got me started in qianxiu rarepair hell but that’s a separate space altogether LMAO)

Anyway—! If writing is too exhausting given life’s demands I am always happy to keep exploring these deranged (affectionate) scenarios. Life persists, but so does the brainrot!