#this is a bunch of half formed scenes in my head

[etheries1015]

We share the love language of biting. Now imagine TWST beatsfolk has that as an actual sign of courting. Like you're chilling with Leona, not dating or wooing him, and then you bite his cheek in affection. And all of Savanaclaw is shocked because among them, it's the same as i.e. proposing marriage. The utter chaos XD

OHH MY GOSSSHHH YOUR BRAIN >>> I LITERALLY LOVE THIS SO MUCH??? HAHAHA SODEFHSELKJD i'm gonna expand on that for a few characters...

Accidentally courting them

General warnings: Gender-neutral reader, not really proof read lol. Obvious Malleus and Lilia favoritism <3 I also decided that they ARE dating in this scenario, I think its cuter that way in my head heuheu

Featuring: Leona, Ruggie, Jack, Malleus, Lilia, ... and Rook HAHA.

TW: none! Just a bunch o' fluff of biting your non-human lover without realizing it was a sign of courtship <3

Leona

It was a typical day for Leona. You two were sitting in the lounge where most of the other students lingered, Leona becoming rather... possessive as of late. Instead of resting in his bedroom away from prying eyes as you had requested from your lover, he ignored all your feeble cries requesting privacy. Instead, he holds you in his lap without worrying what others are thinking. A form of showing others you were his, and his alone. You were conflicted in your feelings, staring at him. His eyes were closed, but he could feel your gaze burning into his head.

"How long are you-" Then it happened. You gave in. You gave his cheek a bit of a nibble. All of the sudden the chattering stopped, all eyes were on you, before they start patting Leonas back and giving him congrats while a few seemed to pull presents right out of their asses.

"Wha- what's going on?" Leona grumbled with a light blush before growling and pushing the face of someone who tried to hand him another gift.

"You all look like idiots! You know biting means something different to us. Don't be dumb." Okay, now you were extra confused. Seeing your utter ignorance, Leona sighed.

"Biting in our land is a sign of courtship, herbivore." ...Oh. You blush deeply and hide your face in his chest, Leona looking away flustered and ruffling your hair.

"Try again in a few years, and I just might bite you back."

Ruggie

You were walking down the halls with your boyfriend when suddenly you had the urge to just...bite him. an overwhelming sense of love and affection for the fact he had given you some of the bread he (probably legally) got ahold of. You smiled fondly at the bread and back at Ruggie before placing your mouth on the bulb of his shoulder, causing him to yelp in suprise and dropping his half of the bread.

"wha- huh?! What was that for?" He became flustered, bending over to pick up his bread and slowly move away from you with bright red cheeks. You furrowed your eyebrows and hugged yourself, almost embarrassed.

"I'm sorry, I just...I dunno," Your cryptic and non specific response left him with his jaw open and eyes wide, spluttering out things like "We're still in school! I don't have the funds yet-" before a familiar fist came and knocked the back of Ruggies head. Leona stood there smiling in amusement and chuckling at you.

"I don't think they know what that means to us beastman, Ruggie." Even more confused then before, you asked for clarification.

"You just asked him to marry you with that bite of yours, herbivore." Now YOUR mouth was wide open, and Ruggie managed to get flee from the scene without much notice from you nor his senior.

Oh brother. You have a lot of communicating to do with that one.

Jack

You were sitting at the lunch table eating away at your food when you noticed...Jack's biceps. You marveled at the sight of his bulky arms- it's a wonder to you how he managed to become so strong and have the motivation to train all day. With a burst of admiration, instead of biting into your sandwich - you took a bite into his muscle. He yelped in suprise and just stared at you, face slowly turning red. Ace and Deuce laughed at his reaction, ready to ask you what was up before Jack took it upon himself to... well, flustered and rapidly spit-firing plans.

"W-we are still so young! Are you sure about this? I-i never knew our relationship was at this level!" He grabbed both of your hands and looked you in your (bewildered) eyes.

"If you're serious about this, I promise I will protect and love you for the rest of my life. But before we go ahead with the ceremony, I want you to meet my parents and get their blessings. Oh, and I need to get a stable job after we finish school first, too, so I can support you and our future. know we haven't talked about marriage before but-" You quickly cut him off in astonishment before crying out,

"MARRIAGE?! Jack, WHAT are you talking about?! I am absolutely not ready for marriage! What got into you?!"

...Queue Ruggie and Leona hysterically laughing at your utter confusion, reveling in the ignorance of it all for a few moments longer before explaining properly what you had just committed yourself unknowingly to.

Malleus

You were laying in the bed of Malleus Draconias's dorm, scrolling on your phone whilst his tail wrapped around your waist as he sat next to you reading a book. You sighed lightly and leaned your head back against the board of the mattress, turning slightly to look at your handsome fae lover. Your eyes then went down to his pale and perfect skin of his neck, the way it was free from all blemishes, smooth, and bright. Something about it made you want to taint it a light shade of red... He felt you shuffle slightly to adjust your body to be in just the right position where his neck was in full view. He glanced over to you feeling you wriggle free from his tails grasp, tilting his head seeing the look in your eyes crazed as you leaned over and just...chomped down on his collarbone.

You felt his tail twitch and his hands quickly throw the book he was reading aside to grasp your wrists, turning your body around and pinning you to the bed and carrassing your cheek with his tail.

"Biting..." He murmured, "Does this mean the same to humans as it does to Fae? You wish to be wed?" Your jaw dropped and cheeks took on a rosey hue, stuttering over yourself.

"W-wed?! I mean, I like to bite when I feel affectionate b-but marriage...I mean maybe one day b-but-"

"Biting in Fae culture is a sign of courtship and ownership. How brazen of you to mark me," he chuckled, "I shall take it you wish to own the next king of Briar Valley?" You could tell at this point Malleus was teasing you, something he picked up from the time you two have been dating.

Malleus could not help but return the favor by riddling your body with his own bite marks. Although he understood you perhaps did not have the intention of marrying him with your silly little form of affection, he knew in his mind with every bite that he was very serious about your future with him.

Lilia

Lilia already knew that biting in the human world did not mean marriage, yet was akin to something more of "cute aggression." So when you have the habit of biting him in the privacy of yours or his room, he knows you simply meant it as a form of affection, letting him know that you had an overwhelming sense of love for the old fae. He bit you back consistently on many occasions, it just seemed to be the perfect form of showing love for one another.

You didn't actually know it meant something much deeper, until you were in the diasomnia lounge and unable to control yourself as you grabbed Lilias hand and bit down gently on his wrist. You couldn't help it, he was being so entirely silly and loving towards you, that you couldn't help but show this public display of affection. Much to everyone else's dismay, however. Sebek stares at you with his mouth agape, sounds of disbelief escaping past his lips yet a sentence unable to form. Malleus as well seemed surprised at this.

"(y/n)," Malleus said, "You wish to marry Lilia?" You coughed at the sudden question and let out a feeble and awkward chuckle.

"I mean...I wouldn't mind one day, of course. We haven't really talked about it. Why the sudden question?"

"HOW DARE YOU," Sebek cried out after finally finding his words, "How dare you bite Lilia and be so insolent as to not move forward with your actions in dignity! YOU MUST TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR PROPOSAL-" Lilia started snickering, cutting Sebek off with a wave of his hand.

"It's quite alright, Sebek. Biting means something much different to humans than Fae, I suppose this is the first you had seen us put on a show of affection, hence your confusion." He turned to you, who had furrowed eyebrows and pursed lips at Sebeks sudden outburst.

"Biting, my dear, is a form of courtship to us fae. It is a sign of ownership," He chuckled.

"Why didn't you tell me that?!" You exasperated, "I mean, it wouldn't have changed anything I have done, but I would have been more careful about it... especially if it means something more to you," Lilia gracefully explained he understood it meant something slightly different to humans, before gently grabbing your hand and raising it to his mouth.

"Well, now that you understand what it means," He put your ring finger into his mouth and took a bite at the base,

"Would you like to bite me once more, my dear?"

Bonus:

Rook

You bit his arm and he immediately was on one knee.

"Was that a proposal? You know mon cheri, biting one affectionately is often a declaration of courtship-" You hit the top of his head and walked away from your interesting boyfriend.

"You're not a beastman or a fae! I'm never biting you again!" Your face red and folding your arms, turning away (ah, his cute tsundere lover.)

Oh woe is Rook! He begs and begs you to bite him more, he wants to be covered in your marks. It means you were claiming him as your own, right? RIGHT??

~~~

This was so fun to write DFSEFDSFIHSLDKJF thank you for the brain rot heuheuheueheueh

Masterlist

[duck-a-doodle]

The Rumoured Casper’s Honeybee (1/2) [EDITED]

A/N: Hello there! This is a little unedited drabble that has been stuck in my head, so I hope you enjoy it!

P.S.: I have edited and changed some grammar and the plot point to fit the second half better.

WARNING: Potentially OOC Simon 'Ghost' Riley. The reader is 'married to work' and is slower on tphe uptake. Let there be ANGST then fluff.

SUMMARY: Simon "Ghost" Riley, who has shockingly grown accustomed to you, seeks your medical attention. Masterlist

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The role of a medical professional under military services is nothing to choke at. Sounds of barked orders and the bright glint of hospital lights have become a familiar environment, and your eyes have grown accustomed to the olive drab greens and the standard heavy gears that came and went in a clinical setting, and that scene held true, even after your transfer to the 141.

Of the men in this base, the most outstanding ones you knew were Captain John Price, Sergeant Garrick, Sergeant McTavish and — Ghost. Tales of their stunts would float down the hallways thus naturally, you knew of them before you were properly acquainted. Loosely acquainted. Before you found your place in the 141, you were reserved, fastidious and competent, earning yourself the call sign 'Honeybee'. That had been your impression to many others of your field before you joined, and that was not to change now at your newly designated location.

It would not be uncommon for the clients to remember their practitioners and vice versa, but your case just seemed a little more special than the rest.

Ghost, who you prefered to refer to as ‘lieutenant’, seemed to have made himself familiar in your routine for the last two months. Prior to your arrival as the new medic of this organisation, you were told that he avoided the clinic like it was the plague, only showing up for the bare minimum of checkups. The turning point, some of your colleagues pointed out, appeared to be around the time you showed up, right as the team had returned from the Las Almas fiasco. No one person dared to deal with the lieutenant after witnessing his demeanour, and where he stepped, a repelling effect took place; anyone and everyone who had ever vaguely heard of him parted around him like the red sea, all except for you who refused to waver at any of the ‘Ghost rumours’.

The commanding officer was yours to manage ever since. For any wounds, illnesses, obligatory checkups or medical documents that he bore, it would be you who handled them. Not that you had any choice in that regard, given that whenever he set foot into the office, a clear path that led to you would reveal itself before him.

Never did you consider it a hassle when you understood it as part of your duty during government time, and soon a routine was formed after every operation he takes on.

He would come back more battered than a steak, and you would be at the ready with your gear, aid kit and all. On the rare, exacting moments of your career, you were even assigned to go out in the field where he had to be, for in the words of Captain Price, “our lieutenant recommended you for the role.”

Even with that, you thought nothing of it. Until you slipped.

The medical room was empty save for yourself and the medical equipment that needed sorting after an intensive few hours of patients filing in and out for appointments and health check-ups. After the last of the bunch left you wired and riddled with a terrible tension headache, you turned around to retrieve some aspirin, only to stop short at the sight of a tall, mass of black standing by the examination stable, waiting.

“Oh for god’s- hello, lieutenant,” You let out a breath after closing your eyes to gain your ground.

“Doc.”

“One moment, lieutenant.” Striding towards the cabinet which held your relief, you quickly popped yourself a pill before returning to address your surprise patient of the day.

Ghost simply lifted his mask slightly, to your surprise, and you looked away instinctively. Moments pass before you realised that the problem laid under the mask; a lip lasceration, there on the corner of his mouth. Wordlessly, you sprung into action despite your exhaustion and the throbbing sensation that weighed on the back of your mind. Carefully, you applied the L.E.T. Gel before going in with absorbable sutures, making sure to puncture the skin surfaces appropriately. Your eyes trained on the gash on his lips, away from the faint scars that litter his lower face, away from the details of his sharp nose and light five o’clock shadow that formed around his jaw.

Through, over, then through again went the needle, pulling the thread together in a quiet, steady rhythm. He never moved an inch; the only signs of life you felt from his were the warmth of his skin and the slow deep breaths that flowed through his chest. And when you were done, you cannot help but find that he is, of all the patients you have had, one of the most disciplined.

Perhaps it was the headache, perhaps it was your sleep-addled mind at play, or perhaps it was your lack of water that made you do it — but in a brief motion, you behaved contrary to your character. Before Ghost could fix his mask properly, you hand reached up to pull it down, lining it smoothly to his jaw before giving his head a soft, gentle pat.

A fleeting eye contact was all it took for your actions to dawn upon you. His eyes froze your hand in place and rendered you near speechless.

“I- My apologies, Capta- I mean, lieutenant. I forgot myself,” embarrassed, you removed your hand from his head immediately. He did not move. He did not blink. You watch cautiously, waiting with bated breath for him to reveal his displeasure. Instead, he chose to drop his head ever so slightly, closing his eyes.

Unsure of what to make of the situation, you followed his implications. Slowly, you rest your full palm against his skull, feeling the top of his head through the coarse fabric of his mask. You move your fingers lightly over his balaclava and feel something soft underneath — it was a bouncy, curling texture under the cloth. He has hair. A huff left your nose before you could stop it and his eyes snapped open to look at you.

Awkwardly, you offered him a small, tight-lipped smile, patting his head twice more before letting your hand drop to your side.

“For being a good patient,” you jested in an attempt to compose yourself.

Not long after he left, you shut your eyes and berated yourself for behaving like an utter fool, for losing your own decorum like a green-faced soldier despite your years of experience. You could not stop thinking about the glint in his eyes before he left that day. It felt almost playful, akin to that of a mischief about to stir awake, and by the devil did that memory return far too often for your liking.

*

Something certainly has shifted.

Soon, he began to visit you more often. You had suspicions that he may have memorised your timetable, and you had even deeper suspicions that it was one of your colleagues who has let him privy to said information. During unforseeable times of the week, a certain lieutenant of the 141 would show up to the clinic, requiring salves for a bruise, requesting ibuprofen for pain relief or even seeking combat gauze for his raw knuckles, of which you were certain that he must already have a few, considering his occupation. Once, he stood waiting behind you silently as you worked on your computer, waiting to ask for a bandaid. Needless to say, you were beyond startled to find that a skull face was poised quietly behind you for goodness knows how long.

You fail to remember exactly when he began to refer to you by your call sign ‘Honeybee’ instead of just ‘Doc’, and all you could think of was the way it rolled off his tongue. Funny, you thought, that the very name should sound just like honey coming from his own scarred lips.

A most prominent change, however, came not in the form of his unprompted visits, but in how they would end. Upon attending to his laughably miniscule thumb injury and amusedly pressing the medical ointment to his palm, he sat stock still on that same medical bed when you thought he would up and go. Mild bewilderment rested upon your knit brows, and you decided to voice your bemusment.

“Is there anything else, lieutenant?”

“Was I not a good patient?” He asked with a solemn expression.

Clearly, he has you dumbfounded. “Well — you are quite well-behaved during treatments, if that’s what you’re asking. So, yes, you are a good patient.”

Watching him closely, your eyes followed his line of sight and it lands, unexpectedly, on your hand. You looked between your raised hand and his unwavering, sharp pupils.

Oh.

Oh.

Once again, you dared to cross the boundary of his space, (or was it a boundary anymore?) and rest your hand on the side of his head this time, rubbing delicately, hesitantly. Fondness flutters warmly in your heart when his eyes shut serenely, enjoying your caring ministrations.

“Did it not bother you, lieutenant?” You whisper through the quietude.

“No,” came his gravelly reply.

He would clarify a little later, another detail that would occupy you for days on end.

“It’s comfortable. Like medicine to the head.”

All the air had tightened in your lungs at his admittance. There was something picturesque about a towering, muscle-bound killing-machine, bending to chase the sympathy of another’s warm fingers. It was almost endearing, the way this light gesture soothed him.

He had felt so — human.

*

Each time he came and went, it seemed to go further, like wading into the deep end of the pool in search of something, with only the vague impression of what you were about to find. Ghost would lean further in with every visit, and with every visit you would hold his head softer still, basking in the warmth of his face in one palm, then in two. He would breathe slower, as if savouring the air, the space, and eventually, his head would come to lean on your shoulder without any questions asked, and you would give him the medical attention he needed.

Cute.

It was, as he said, medicine to the head.

The method was unorthodox, yes, but if it can ease his temperament, then no doubt that a working solution should keep on. Through the two months which this had ensued, he was noticably less irritable and his team, who figured you were the source of his better nature, made sure you knew of the change whenever they came by the clinic. Only a few visits in, and sergeant McTavish, (who insisted that you call him ‘Soap’,) already has the nickname ‘Ghostbuster’ made for you, all in your honour. Even the staff now looked forward to Ghost’s visits too, despite still keeping a clear distance from him. They would observe the man covered in black from head to toe make a beeline for your office like clockwork, and the chatter between colleagues would be unending.

The amount of time with you spent treating on his physical wounds have been abbreviated as much as your call sign whenever he uses it, and it always warmed your ears considerably.

“G’d evenin’, Honey.” His guttural voice would greet.

“Lieutenant Riley,” you replied good-naturedly.

In exchange for shortening your name to something more familiar, he offered you his.

Simon Riley.

Something too intimate lay behind the use of his name, and so you both of you had come to a compromise; the lieutenant may go by Ghost to many, LT to some and Simon to rare few, but to you, he was lieutenant Riley.

He must be.

You were his doctor, and he was your patient, receiving an unusual prescription of several pats on the head every other day. It was a routine, just like any other meeting or appointment.

Speculations of a medic by the callsign ‘Honeybee’ began to spread around base alongside Ghost’s exaggerated talk, and when it reached your own ears through a closer colleague, you all but responded with a cocked brow, and went on with your day. People do little else, you had always known so. With the rising frequency of contact between the both of you, you felt that such hearsay was natural. And as long as nothing brewed inbetween, it was of non-consequence. On the occassion that you do hear the whispers firsthand down the hall, an amusing saying stuck with you; "the Honeybee’s caught a ‘emselves Ghost". Nicknames have been floating about, calling you a "Ghostbuster" or a "Ghost Hunter", and the most ridiculous one being "Lazarus", which was based on an old movie you have heard of but have never seen in your life.

You then caught wind of the lieutenant’s new nickname.

Casper. Such a silly name.

And then yet another nickname, "Kat" has surfaced for you, only this one had made zero sense to you at all.

Regardless of the silly teasings and harmless jibes from your colleagues about Ghost’s very frequent doctor appointments, you went on, working around the clock and going by the books.

Nothing has to change, especially if it meant nothing.

And yet, that silly little "nothing" began to occupy you through the quiet hours, and through the night.

An odd weight began to settle in your throat and chest whenever you saw your special patient, and the nicknames had begun to bother you more and more. You were too busy to think, too overwhelmed by people for an appetite, and too tired to make head nor tail of the week.

"... Doc?"

Your spine snaps straight at the sound of your name. How long have you been floating down your reverie?

"Ah, I'm sorry — yes?"

You colleague, who stood poised in blue scrubs whilst holding a clipboard, grins at you. "Casper was just looking for you. He left though, think his captain called for him or something."

"Ah, I see."

He shook his head lightly and turns to leave, but you stopped him with a question that you could not bear to have unanswered any longer.

"Why do you call him Casper?"

The man hummed, leaving you to sit with a disconcerting moment of silence as the answer sat on the precipice of his tongue.

"You know the plot of Casper, don't you?"

*

You swiveled on your office chair across the tables to your computer, a new task set to mind. Frantic fingers tapped away to solve that nagging mystery, and you felt the fine ends of a thread beginning to pull at the seams of your logic.

From the 1995 movie, he said.

The tab screen loaded your search, and your eyes scan the brief descriptions under each link. A small drop-down bar caught your attention, and in your gut you felt a twist of discomfort at the words that displayed before you.

Casper (1995) Plot What is the relationship between Kat and Casper?

Your breathing stopped at the insinuation, and a weight pulls on your lips as you read on.

… Casper, the ghost protagonist of the movie, falls madly in love with James' loner teenage daughter, Kathleen “Kat” Harvey, who is also looking for a friend. 

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FOOTNOTES:

"Lazarus" is the machine that was meant to bring Casper back to life, so the rumours are suggesting that the reader gives Ghost life.

[science-lings]

okay this has been going through my mind for days and I have to get my thoughts out before I explode

Disclaimer, this is not talking about a specific artist/person and would never condone or participate in anon hate or online bullying for any reason but especially this one. 

I get why people are mad about Link being portrayed as this buff, hypermasculine, tall guy. I am too (again don’t fucking attack people over it though) and it seems like such an infuriating way to change the character just to fit into some ideal of hypermasculine attractiveness or to make a ship fall into a more hetero lense by making him a decent foot taller than whatever girl he’s being paired with. 

The world of video games and action movies and every form of media ever is extremely saturated with male characters that are swole and manly and whatever other descriptors people are trying to push onto Link that don’t fit into his actual character. There are so many characters out there that already fit this male standard and having a clearly androgynous elf guy was like a breath of fresh air. 

Link was literally designed to be a character whose lines on gender were blurred, ‘a girl with a masculine touch or a guy with a feminine touch’ so that anyone could project themselves onto him. His physical design in botw/totk was specifically made to be feminine enough to wear a certain outfit to pass as a woman (which includes a nearly mandatory cutscene where he puts on the clothes and blushes after being called pretty, like you have to be blind to think that its an experience that he doesn’t like at all) and in totk there are a bunch of outfits made for Link that are blatantly gnc, ones that are practically dresses, include nail polish and lipstick, you can even dye his hair bright and vivid colors and that’s half way to giving him new pronouns. The whole reason Linkle isn’t included in more mainline loz games was because her existence would force Link into a gender dichotomy, if there's a clearly female version of the main hero, that means the main hero has to be a man, and they would rather abandon a potential reoccurring character than make Link conform to a gender binary. 

So pardon me when it feels disingenuous and even malicious for him to be morphed into these clear masculine ideals, where he towers over any female romantic partner (even when in canon he is regularly depicted as noticeably shorter than her) or even in m/m fanworks he’s really beefed up, perhaps to make the scene feel more gay or something. 

Perhaps it’s because his more twink-y/ femboy body type is so heavily sexualized (though obviously when people are sculping abs on him it’s totally not because they’re horny about it) and that’s an issue in itself that bothers me. But it’s just so tiring to see one of the very few popular main characters who is short and feminine and androgynous be molded into just another bland muscle-headed action hero over and over and over again. 

I’m not mad at the creators for portraying him differently than how I like him portrayed, I’m mad because we really do get so few characters like him in good popular media, and to be honest, I really like him the way that he is. I love that he’s tiny and has long hair and has the option to dress any way the player likes. It seems a little distasteful to make him taller than a female love interest just because that’s how straight couples have to be, there’s just never been a real straight couple where the guy is shorter than the girl, that’s just Impossible! (/s) 

[tamiart]

I wrote a little romance scene between Halsin and Tav, mostly imagining Halsin’s POV.

Summary: Tav is breaking down under the pressure of the enormous task ahead of her, and Halsin happens upon her.

Since I don’t consider myself a writer, I have never tried to write anything like this before. But I love this game so much, and especially when it comes to these two characters, my imagination is continuously running away with me. I need more material with them, so I tried to create some of my own. I hope you like it.

Midnight Solace

Everyone was finishing up their duties in setting up camp. Halsin looked over to see Tav talking to Wyll and Gale, who were arguing about something as they tried to come up with a strategy for some fight or other, which was now an almost daily occurrence. Tav looked worn out, barely listening to the two of them bicker as she studied a map they had drawn in the dirt. The others were always going to her for help with their problems, and by Silvanus did everyone in this group have catastrophic problems. In all his many years, Halsin had never met such a varied, volatile bunch of individuals. They reminded him of his younger years when every mishap, every mistake, felt like the end of the world.

Tav was the most intriguing to him. She couldn’t be half his age, and yet this young, unassuming slip of a girl had gone out of her way, putting aside her own troubles and fears, which must be plentiful though she never voiced them, for weeks throughout their perilous journey to help many along the way, including himself. She was helping him find a way to lift the shadow curse, which had haunted him for a century as his greatest shame and failure. She had risked her life to infiltrate a horde of nasty, treacherous little goblins to free him - a huge, threatening wild bear that could have tried to kill her too for all she knew. But even in his most savage form, she wasn’t afraid of him. 

Halsin had never met anyone like her. He often found himself watching her from across camp as she went about the daily routine that everyone had settled into - helping to prepare their meals, eating, talking and laughing with everyone around the fire, getting ready to go to sleep, preparing to head out in the mornings. He wondered about her as he performed his own duties. He felt himself drawn to her, and realized he was reluctant to leave her side. He was sorely tempted to forsake his druidic duties and stay with her, to be there for her and protect her for as long as she would let him during her quest to save them all. She stirred long-dormant feelings in him. He couldn’t remember the last time he had felt this way about anyone.

Later that night, after everyone had sought their bedrolls, rest seemed to elude Halsin, so he gave up and headed towards the woods to lose himself in a hunt. As he walked past Tav’s bedroll, he noticed she wasn’t there. He looked around briefly, but did not see her. Slightly alarmed, he enhanced his senses and picked up her scent trail heading into the forest. Wanting to make sure she was alright, he followed it.

As he approached the stream nearby, he heard the sound of someone crying. He stopped and peered through the trees in that direction and saw that it was Tav, sitting by the water, her head resting on her bent knees. He felt a sympathetic pang to see and hear her so distraught. Not wanting to frighten her, he made his footsteps audible as he rounded a bush and approached her, and she started up and noticed him, and immediately turned away to surreptitiously wipe away the traces of her misery. He felt his heart stir.

“Oh, Halsin,” she said, “what are you doing out here so late?”

“I could not sleep,” he responded, “so I was going for a walk. I could ask you the same thing. Are you alright, my friend?”

At that, she failed at reigning in her emotions and burst into sobs once more.

“I’m sorry,” she sputtered through her tears. “I don’t know what’s come over me tonight.”

He hurried over and sat beside her. “It’s alright,” he tried to reassure her. But she could not stop, and he hesitantly reached out to touch her shoulder.

His touch seemed to relax something in her and she leaned towards him. He put his arm around her and held her closer. The feel of her sobs shaking her slight frame melted away his final resistance, and he knew then that he would do anything to help this girl. He was lost to her. He held her until her sobs quieted into sniffles. 

“What is it, my friend? Can I do anything to help?” He asked her gently.

“No, I’ll be okay.” She sighed.”Ugh look at me, I’m such a mess.”

“You are still beautiful. But stay here, I’ll get something for you.” Halsin quietly returned to his tent and found a clean cloth, poured a cup of water and grabbed a blanket as well, then returned to Tav’s side. She had calmed down and sat quietly staring into the stream with a troubled expression on her face. He draped the blanket around her shoulders and handed her the water and cloth.

 “Thank you. I didn’t want anyone to see me like this,” said Tav, wiping her tear-stained face. “They’re all depending on me to be strong. I need to be strong for all of us if we’re going to get through this.” She took a sip of water and put the cup down on a rock.

He placed his arm around her again and pulled her close. “No one expects you to be invincible. You don’t need to carry all of it alone. We’re all here to help you. I’m here to help you.”

She looked up at him, tears glistening in her eyelashes. The distance between them was too close. The urge to kiss her was overpowering, and it took all of his will to resist. She needed him to be strong just now, and he would give her his support.

“Thanks, Halsin,” She closed her eyes and sighed, leaning her head on his shoulder. “That’s nice to hear. I just… I’m so afraid. I don’t know what I’m doing half of the time. Why does every decision have to fall to me? Every time one of us gets injured, I wonder if I should give it all up. Maybe I’m just leading us all to our deaths.” Her voice choked on those last words, and she covered her face with her hands and pulled away from him. “I can’t… that thought… it’s too much to bear.”

“Your fears are completely understandable under the circumstances. We have far too much leveled against us, with no end to our journey in sight. What an incredible amount of pressure to undertake. But Tav, you’ve been amazing thus far. Why do you think everyone trusts you so implicitly? No one else could have gotten this eccentric group of misfits this far, to survive as much as we have. Honestly, I don’t know how you’ve managed it. You don’t realize how extraordinary you truly are. My dear friend, we would all follow you anywhere. I would follow you anywhere. If anyone is going to get us all through this, it’s you.” 

Tav looked up at him again, a new light and curiosity in her glance. “You truly believe that?”

“With all my heart.”

Suddenly she threw her arms around him and buried her face in his chest. Oak father preserve him, Tav had him wrapped around her finger. “Thanks, Halsin,” she whispered into him. She looked up at him again, and her face finally softened into a smile. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“Tav, I - “ he tried to find the right words. “Please know that I’m always here for you, if you ever need to talk about anything. I will do my best to help you, in any way that you need.”

She was still looking up at him, her gaze searching. She was so beautiful, he could hold back no longer. Cautiously, he lowered his face down towards her, watching her expression as he did so. She did not pull away, and her lips parted as her glance fell to his mouth. He closed the distance and pressed his lips to hers. He tasted the salt of her tears as he kissed her, and she kissed him back, tentatively at first, but quickly growing more eager. Her lips were full, soft and warm. Finally they both had to pull away, gasping for air. He had to stop now before he took things too far. He couldn’t ask that much of her just now in her current vulnerable state.

Tav stared at him, stunned. Then as if suddenly realizing where she was, she blushed and gave him a shy, tentative smile. “Wow,” She gasped as she found her voice. “What was that?”

“I’ve dreamed about kissing you for a long time,” he confessed to her.

“Really? But I didn’t… I thought… you’ve never…” Tav stammered.

“I know. I didn’t want to do anything to upset you or harm our friendship. And I didn’t want to distract you during such a crucial and difficult time. I’ve been trying to keep my distance, to let you focus.”

Tave let out a breathy laugh. “Well, it’s a very welcome distraction.” She hesitated, then looked up at him shyly once more. “I’ve been thinking about that as well, with you.”

He wrapped her in his arms once more and held her in silence. They sat together, listening to the night sounds of the forest and the babble of the nearby stream. Gradually, he felt her relax in his arms. Her head began to droop against his shoulder. He could have stayed this way all night. But reluctantly, he gently shook her awake.

“You should try to get some sleep,” he told her. “Tomorrow is going to be a long day.”

She sighed. “You’re right.” She stood up and handed the blanket back to him. She tried to return the cloth as well, but he told her to keep it. She seemed reluctant to go. “Thank you, Halsin. This was… it means a lot.” She smiled at him once more.

And she was gone before he could respond, leaving him alone once more in the woods, the blanket in his arms, all of his senses full of her, and his mind a whirl of thoughts, emotions and desires.

[delicatebarness]

The Avengers Bunch | Avengers Assemble (Ikea's Version) #002

Summary: You buy new furniture for your bedroom, apparently building a bookcase isn't in your agent skillset.

Warning: DIY. Fluff.

Word Count: 834

Series Masterlist | Tips

A/N: Requests are open for this series. Anything domestic and homey you want to see happen in the compound? Let me know. - B

Tags: Let me know if you want to be tagged in future parts.

Optimism drove your determination as you admired the neatly arranged boxes that arrived today from Ikea. Assembling a bookcase seemed like a simple task when you finally decided to make the purchase. Little did you know, the so-called straightforward process was about to turn into confusion and frustration in a matter of minutes. 

You emptied the contents of the boxes onto your bedroom floor. Step one is to organize the pieces. Done. Step two, follow the instructions. Simple enough, you thought to yourself. You were wrong.

Hours had passed, and a task that should have taken half an hour at the most has now turned into three and a half… you found yourself surrounded by a jumble of wood and tiny screws. You swore you could hear each piece mocking and laughing at your attempts at assembly. Cursing under your breath, you noticed sweat forming on your forehead. 

Just then, your bedroom door creaked open, and in walked Bucky. Your colleague, bedroom neighbor, and the most attractive man you had laid eyes on. His smile illuminated the now dimly lit room, you couldn’t help but release a sigh of relief at the sight of him.

“Hey there, trouble,” he teased, his eyes wandering around your room, they twinkled with amusement as he took in the chaos before him. “Need a hand?” 

You chuckled nervously having realized just how comedic the scene must look. “I might have bitten off more than I can chew,” you admitted, gesturing to the pile of unassembled wood.

Bucky made his way over, his confidence contrasted with your frazzled state. He knelt beside you, you watched the features of his face contour as he examined the pieces and instructions. 

“Lucky for you, I happen to be somewhat of a DIY guru,” he quipped, a smirk tugged at his lips as he looked back at you. 

Together, you made a start on the assembly, your laughter mingling with the sound of clinking screws and the odd muttered curse… mainly coming from you. Bucky’s hand occasionally brushed against yours as you passed each other screws, hammers, and Allen wrenches. 

As the last screw tightened and the final shelf slid into position, a sense of victory washed over the two of you. Stepping back, you admired your handiwork. Okay, you admired Bucky’s handiwork. You looked back at each other, your eyes lingered on each other just a little longer. 

“I couldn’t have done it without you,” you murmured, your voice soft and filled with gratitude.

Bucky grinned, and his hand reached up to push a stray hair behind your ear. “Anytime you need a hand, remember mine's Vibranium,” he replied, his tone laced with a slight hint of flirtation that sent shivers down your spine. 

Great, you thought to yourself, now you’re thinking about his hand. 

Bucky began to get ready to leave, “Well, I guess my work here is done, I’ll let you enjoy your new piece of art in peace,” he said, his smile evident as he turned towards the door. 

But before he left, a thought struck you. “Wait,” you rushed, causing him to pause mid-step and turn back to face you.

“What is it?” He asked, his eyes darting around the room, his instinct to look for danger.

You hesitated for a moment, gathering your thoughts before speaking. “I just realized I have all these books,” you gestured towards the boxes of books piled on your bed. “And now, I have to figure out how to arrange them and some of the shelves,” your tone started to sound more sheepish as you dropped his gaze. “Some of the shelves are quite high.”

Bucky shook his head at you, his eyes once again filled with amusement. Before you could finish forming words to ask for his help, he had already sprung into action. He effortlessly gathered books and started arranging them into alphabetic order. 

Before you knew it, the books were neatly arranged. You admired Bucky as he stood back with a satisfied smile. “There you go,” he said, gesturing to the small plant he added to one of the shelves. “All done.” 

You couldn’t help but smile back, feeling a warmth spread through you at his kindness. It still amazes you that people saw this man as a monster. 

“Thank you,” you said softly, you took a moment to build the courage to stay what you wanted to. “Would you like to stay for a bit longer? Maybe we could order some pizza and I could show you another 90s movie?” 

To your relief, Bucky’s smile widened, “I’d love to,” he replied, his tone sincere. 

And as you settled on your bed, you enjoyed your pizza and movie together. The glow of your laptop casts soft shadows against your walls and the air is filled with the scent of cheese and tomato sauce. You both laughed at the same parts, you may have cried at one part, but, throughout the whole film, his arm was wrapped securely around you.

---

Series Masterlist

[toournextadventure]

movie nights iv

Summary: You gather the Woodsboro survivors to go over your suspect list. Maybe you're just trying to impress Tara. That's for you to know and no one else to find out.

Word Count: 6.1K Warnings: swearing, Scream levels of violence Pairing: Tara Carpenter x Reader (pt.i) (pt.ii) (pt.iii) (pt.iv) (pt.v) (pt.vi) (pt.vii) (pt.viii)

The door was open. It was wide open, all that rat bastard had to do was walk right through it so you could kill him yourself. No fire escape, no hideaway, only the door. Why hadn't he walked through the goddamn-

"-You're not listening to me."

You blinked once before looking back over to your Aunt Sherry. By some miracle - it was still unclear if it was a good miracle or not - she had been the paramedic on scene. She hadn't truly questioned you yet, but you knew it was bound to happen. Your family was nothing if not nosy.

"What did you say?" You asked, fighting against the natural slip of an accent that would mimic Aunt Sherry's perfectly.

She gave you a pity-filled look. "Did he get ya anywhere else?"

"No," you instantly replied with a shake of your head. "That's it."

"Then you're all set," she said as she went to pat your shoulder. Thankfully she caught herself in time and patted your back instead. "And you don't want to go to Mercy?"

"Absolutely not," you mumbled as you hopped out of the back of the ambulance. "And don't tell Ma or Pop!"

"It's already on the news, kiddo," she said with a shrug. "If they know, they know."

"You're good for nothing," you shouted as you backpedaled to where Tara and her bunch were still standing. "See ya at mass."

Aunt Sherry waved at you and shook her head, but otherwise let you go. You looked down at the stitches now keeping your bicep together. Only five; it could've been much worse. If that was the bastard you were up against, he wouldn't be much of a challenge. Couldn't even swing a knife properly. Talk about pathetic.

You mouthed a “hey” at Tara when you finally got closer. It was cold now that the adrenaline was wearing off and you were finally feeling the cold autumn air. Would have been nice to have some sort of jacket. Or your shirt that Tara was still wearing. Well, you supposed everyone could enjoy seeing you half-naked. You would just freeze to death, it was fine.

“You okay?” Tara asked quietly, her eyes darting to the stitched up wound.

“Course I am, sweetheart,” you said with a shrug. You didn’t have the heart to tell her that it was starting to sting like a sonofabitch.

“Are you hurt?” Sam asked, and both you and Tara turned to look at her. If you were cold before, you were frozen under her icy stare.

“I mean… I’ve been worse,” you said as you did your best to avoid her gaze.

“Good,” she said. You didn’t have time to brace yourself before she slapped your uninjured arm. “What the hell were you thinking?”

“Ouch!” You complained. “The hell are you getting mad at me for?”

“I told you to stay away from my sister,” Sam continued. “You could have gotten her killed.”

“You think I called your stupid little serial killer?” You asked; you could feel the accent coming back in full force. All it did was make you more frustrated. “Isn’t he supposed to call me?”

“Guys-”

“-Nothing happened until you got Tara alone,” she interrupted Danny. “And that’s just a coincidence?”

You scrunched your face up and shrugged your shoulders. “Yes?” You said. “Why would I want anything to do with your psycho killer?”

“Hey, that’s enough,” Tara said, moving to hold Sam’s arm.

It didn’t stop her. “We were doing just fine until you came along.” Sam jabbed her finger into your chest.

“You really think the two ‘a youse were doin’ fine?” You asked. “You’re trust issues and repressed trauma in human form.”

“Hey,” Tara scolded, her eyes now on you.

“Listen, I’m sorry, but I’m right,” you said, holding your hands up in mock surrender. “And you can be suspicious all you want, but why the fuck would I interrupt myself finally gettin’ laid for the first time in months?”

“Oh my god,” Tara whispered to herself as she turned her back to you.

“I have priorities too,” you defended.

“Fine,” Sam said quickly. “If I say I believe you, will you please shut up?”

“Yes,” you said.

You all finally fell silent, Sam still giving you a look that meant she did not believe you, but at least she had stopped arguing. Danny was giving you that stupid “I’m not mad, just disappointed” look, and Tara still wouldn’t face you. What was going on in the world? You were just supposed to get laid, you weren’t supposed to be dealing with… whatever the fuck all of this was.

“So,” you finally said as police continued to mill around you. “What do you guys normally do now?”

“Seriously?” Tara asked, finally turning back to look at you.

“I’m no Ghostface expert,” you said defensively, again. “Do we just… go on as normal?” A chorus of groans followed your question. “Because I still need to go clean up the kitchen.”

“I do too,” Danny said, looking at Sam for a moment before turning back to you.

Unfortunately for him, Tara noticed and she stood up straighter.

“What was my sister doing in your apartment anyway?” She asked him. His mouth flopped open and closed like a fish out of water.

“Oh how the tables have turned,” you said as you crossed your arms over your chest and cocked your hip. “About damn time.”

“I was helping him carry up groceries,” Sam said with a slight shake of her head.

“Oh, so you can go into a stranger’s apartment and I can’t even have someone I know over?” Tara asked.

“Okay, hang on,” you said, somehow turning into the middle man. This whole night was turning into a disaster. You needed a drink. Or five.

“No, she doesn’t get to accuse you when she’s acting suspicious,” Tara said with a shake of her head before looking at Sam and Danny again. “So do you know him or not?”

“Tara-”

“-no, Sam,” she interrupted. “What is he to you?”

You locked eyes with Danny at the same time Tara and Sam locked eyes. Part of you wanted to just break the awkward tension and say Danny was with Sam. It would get Tara off his back and you could all go about the real problem; finally getting you back into a shirt so you wouldn’t freeze your tits off.

Sam sighed. “He and I are… a thing.”

“I knew it,” Tara said softly.

“Tara-”

“-I would’ve been happy for you,” she said. “If you hadn’t accused my partner of being Ghostface.”

“I’m your partner now?” You asked, perking up immediately.

“Shut up,” she said quickly.

“Yes ma’am,” you said, snapping your jaw shut. God you loved when she was mean.

“If I may-”

“-You may not,” Tara said, turning to face Danny. “I don’t want to hear from any of you right now.”

“How about from me?”

All four of you shut your mouths and looked around, finally seeing Detective Bailey walking toward your little group. You sighed and looked around. The last person you wanted to see at the moment was him. Well, okay, the last person you wanted to see was Ghostface, but Detective Bailey was a very close second.

“Why am I not surprised to see you here?” He asked, clapping you on the shoulder of your hurt arm. Oh fuck it hurt.

“Always a pleasure, Detective,” you said politely through a forced smile.

“You sound just like your old man,” he said.

“Bet I do,” you mumbled as you turned your head away.

“I’m going to need the two of you to come down for a talk,” Bailey said, pointing to you and Tara.

“Not us?” Danny asked.

“I’m coming too,” Sam said without waiting for Bailey to answer.

“You’ll be waiting in a separate room,” Bailey said. You didn’t blame him for not even arguing; if anyone knew Sam, they knew to just roll with the punches. “Come on.”

You followed him, Tara quick behind you. With a glance, you saw Danny and Sam talking for a moment before he backed away toward the apartment. She, on the other hand, caught up in only a few strides and forced herself in between you and Tara. If it hadn’t been for the whole just-nearly-getting-murdered thing, you would’ve teased her about her territorial tendencies.

“Don’t put me back there with her,” you said quietly when Bailey tried to put you in the back of the squad car. Right beside Sam. “She’s not my biggest fan.”

“Neither am I,” he said with a smile before pushing your head down and shoving you into the car. “Get in.”

You practically fell into the car, your knees banging against the front seat. It was still cold as hell and now your arm was strained. A quick glance down showed a few little spots of blood. Great. Now that was split again too. Why couldn’t anyone just let you grab some clothes?

The entire ride to the station you could feel Sam’s gaze on you. No, not a gaze, it was a full-blown glare. If you had died in that apartment, you didn’t think she would’ve been too upset about the fact. And Tara was being diplomatic and keeping her mouth shut, looking out the window as the city passed by. It was smart.

“So,” you started, “did you and Danny have a nice night?”

“Shut up,” Sam mumbled.

“Okay,” you said quickly.

Well, at least no one could say you didn’t try.

It was a short drive to the station, and you felt like you were going to combust under Sam’s eyes. The scrutiny didn’t stop when you pulled into the station, and it certainly didn’t stop when you walked in. If looks could kill? Yeah, it was a real thing. It might not kill, but it definitely made you want to die.

“Hey, Y/N,” Linda at reception said when you walked in.

“Hey, babe,” you said with a wink, walking over to lean on the desk. “How’re the little rascals?”

“They’re good,” she said, leaning forward on her arms. “Found you a girl yet?”

“Think so,” you said, fully putting on the charm. “Right over there,” you gestured your head behind you.

“I’m guessin’ it’s not the one givin’ you the “eat shit and die” look?”

You both turned your head to look at Sam, who had now crossed her arms over her chest. Tara wasn’t even trying to stop her; you didn’t blame her. Samantha Carpenter was a force of nature that no one wanted to fight against. Tara had probably learned that after the first Ghostface attack in Woodsboro.

“Good guess,” you mumbled.

“Keep moving,” Bailey said as he walked past you with Tara and Sam hot on his heels.

“We’ll catch up another time,” you said, sending Linda a wink and smile.

“Countin’ on it,” she replied before blowing a kiss in your direction.

Your brother was going to kill you for flirting with his wife.

It was a familiar walk back to Bailey’s interrogation room. While Sam was directed to a separate room, you walked in ahead of Tara and sat down in the seat that you had secretly designated as your own. At the rate you frequented, you might as well just carve your name into the wood. Just so Bailey would always have a reminder of you whether he wanted it or not.

“Here,” he said when he walked in and threw something at you. You flinched, but caught it. “Put that on.”

“Thanks,” you mumbled as you pulled the NYPD shirt over your head. You sneezed. “Sorry,” you said when you wiped your nose. “I’m allergic to pigs.”

“Stop,” Tara whispered to you.

“What can you tell me about tonight?” He asked, completely ignoring your comment.

“We were just having dinner and watching a movie,” you said with a shrug. “Bada bing, bada boom, little rat bastard interrupts.”

“Did you find him?” Tara asked. Why was everyone ignoring you? You were the one with the injuries, right? Shouldn’t you have more of a say than anyone else? Maybe you had a lot more to learn about this whole Ghostface thing than you had thought.

“We didn’t find anything,” Bailey said with a shrug. “Got anyone who has it out for you?”

They both turned to look at you after the question had been voiced. You looked between the both of them. Oh for fuck’s sake, now it was just getting insulting. There was no winning for you, was there? First you’re interrupted, then you’re attacked, then interrogated by not only Sam but now Bailey too? Well, fuck you, you guessed.

“Why are the two ‘a youse looking at me?” You asked. “I stay out of trouble.”

They both gave you exasperated looks.

“I mostly stay out of trouble,” you corrected.

“Was your sister accounted for?” Bailey asked.

“She was across the alley with a guy,” Tara answered with a shake of her head.

“Danny,” you filled in. “He didn’t do this.”

“And neither did Sam,” she said.

“Did he target one of you more than the other?” He asked.

“He turned to face Tara,” you said as you recalled the event. Most of it was a blur, but you could pick out one or two pieces. “But he didn’t have enough time to really target anyone.”

“Then you need to stay safe,” he said directly to Tara. “I would guess he’s going after your Woodsboro crew.”

“Typical,” Tara huffed, falling back against her chair.

“What do we do?” You asked, doing the opposite of her and leaning forward on the table. “Twiddle our thumbs until you maybe catch the guy?”

“Are you calling us incompetant?”

“Yeah,” you said with a nod. “I am.”

“You’re going to go home and let us do our jobs,” he said.

“And if you don’t do your jobs?” You asked with a tilt of your head.

“You’re still going to stay out of it.” He wasn’t even looking at Tara anymore. “Do I make myself clear?”

“Crystal,” you answered.

You kept your eyes locked on his. It wasn’t your first stare down with Bailey, and it certainly wouldn’t be your last. You knew you were on his permanent shit list, but quite frankly you didn’t care. His group of piss poor detectives had let you all down time and time again, you weren’t going to trust him with your life.

And you certainly weren’t going to trust him with Tara’s.

“You’re both free to go,” he finally said. “We’ll be in touch.”

“I bet you will,” you said, but stood up anyway.

Tara left the room before you, and you sent one more glare at Bailey before following suit. To no one’s surprise, Sam was already waiting. She checked on Tara and gave you a once-over before starting the walk out of the station. You gave Linda a smile and a little wave before walking outside.

Where the news stations were waiting.

It was absolute pandemonium. Too many voices, too many flashing lights, you were amazed the Carpenters weren’t fazed. Well, you were amazed but not surprised. You knew all the shit they had to deal with since Woodsboro. They were probably used to all the commotion that came with being survivors of a brutal series of killings.

“Don’t talk to them,” you said as you quickly got between them and the reporters. “Keep walking, I’ll take care of it.”

You turned around and held your arms behind you to keep a hold of Tara and did what you knew would work. As your godmother had taught you, you started swearing up a storm. Every word you could think of to form the most colourful string of curses you could come up with. The looks of pure agitation and frustration on the reporters’ faces was enough to make you smile.

“That doesn’t work on me, sweetheart.”

Your smile fell when Gale walked into your view.

“Now’s not the time,” you said with a pointed look. “We can talk later.”

“An exclusive?” She asked, following behind you as you pushed Sam and Tara down the sidewalk and away from the station. And the reporters.

“Without your cronie,” you said.

Gale gave you a look of pure exasperation, but only a moment later waved for her cameraman to leave. You waited for him to be out of earshot before you gestured for her to follow you, and she instantly fell into step with you as you both caught up to the Carpenters. They didn’t seem as impressed, but at least they knew her.

“Are you okay?” She asked you. “I heard you got hurt.”

“Just a scratch,” you said with a shrug. “Far less than you lot have gone through.”

“I had wanted to keep you out of all of this,” she said.

“Well,” you sighed. “Seems I’m in it now.”

“What are you doing here, Gale?” Sam asked, turning around quickly and stopping the four of you in your tracks. “I think you know we’re not too happy with you.”

“No one is ever happy with me, sweetheart,” Gale said with her News Smile. “I’m actually here to check up on Y/N.”

“With your cameraman?”

“How do you know Y/N?” Tara and Sam asked at the same time.

Everyone turned to look at you, who was in the process of biting your fingers off. You froze under the scrutiny, your hands slowly falling back down to your side where you shoved them in your pants pockets. It seemed like you were just going to be interrogated for the rest of your life.

“I’m their godmother,” Gale said when it was clear you were a little too frazzled to talk.

“Excuse me?” Tara asked.

“My Pop went to college with her,” you finally managed to say. “Suppose he liked her enough to make her part of the family.”

“And you just failed to mention that little fact?” Tara asked, her arms crossed defensively over her chest. Oops.

“Didn’t think it mattered,” you said with a shrug, “I’m not Woodsboro.”

“Can we focus?” Sam asked. “What do you want, Gale?”

“What happened?” Gale asked. “No recorder, no camera, just tell me.”

The three of you looked at each other and sighed. They might not trust Gale - which was understandable, she had written a book when she said she wouldn’t - but you did. She might not be blood, but she was family. You gave the Carpenters time to stop you before turning to face her and telling her what happened.

You ommitted the little detail that you were mid-lay.

“I’m going to go do some digging,” she said with a dazed nod of her head. “You do the same?”

“Yes ma’am,” you said with a shrug. “I’ve got a few things to go over.”

“Good,” she said before looking back at Sam and Tara. “Stay safe.” She looked at you. “All of you.”

All of you nodded and mumbled an agreement before bidding Gale goodbye. You watched and waited for her to be gone before turning back around to face the others. Now that everything had mostly calmed down, you were starting to focus on the real issue at hand again.

“What now?” Tara asked, her eyes flicking between you and Sam.

“We need to meet up with Chad and Mindy,” Sam said. “Fill them in.”

“I’ll head to my apartment,” you said. Tara opened her mouth to protest almost instantly. “I need to go over a few things.”

“We need to stick together,” she said.

“We can all meet up at my apartment tomorrow night,” you said with a gentle voice. “I’ve got some digging of my own to do.”

“No one even knows where you live,” Sam said. She looked at Tara and waited to see if she knew. Thankfully, she didn’t, and Sam let out a barely noticeable sigh of relief.

“I’ll call you from a burner and tell you the address,” you said. Both girls looked at you with raised brows. “Can’t trace a burner, and it guarantees it won’t be mirrored.”

“That’s some sketchy shit,” Tara said. “How do you know this stuff?”

“Got a few tricks up my sleeve,” you shrugged. “Still not Ghostface,” you defended when Sam gave you a judgmental look.

“Then we’ll see you tomorrow,” Sam said. “Come on.”

She turned around to leave, and you stood there watching her go. Tara hesitated, looking between you and Sam. As much as you wanted her to stick around, you knew she needed to be with her gang. No one could understand them the way they understood each other, and one little half-hearted attack didn’t make you one of them. You knew that.

“Go on,” you said softly with a gentle smile. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

She looked at you for a little too long, long enough to have you shifting your weight from foot to foot. You inhaled deeply, trying your best to calm your racing thoughts and pulse. Tara stepped forward slowly and grabbed the front of your shirt, pulling you down just enough to plant a gentle kiss on your cheek.

“Stay safe,” she said. “I mean it.”

“Yes ma’am,” you said with another smile.

Tara took that as good enough and turned around, jogging to catch up with Sam. You could see the both of them talking, and Sam’s arm wrapped protectively around Tara’s shoulders. It was sweet. You couldn’t even imagine what all they went through on a regular basis. All the chaos was enough to make anyone insane. They were lucky to have each other.

You shook the thought out of your head and started the long walk back to your apartment. If they were all coming over tomorrow night, you would need to have all your ducks in a row. No way were you inviting veterans into your home only to look like a fool.

—---

By the time everyone showed up at your apartment, you were running on 43 hours of being awake, your seventh espresso, and your 13th RedBull. Were you going insane? Yes. Could you smell colours? Absolutely. In fact, red smelled like black pepper. Or maybe that was the disgusting takeout you had been munching on for the past nine hours.

Damn, you needed to clean. Thank god Garret wouldn’t be back from his parent’s house until next weekend.

The knock on your front door pulled you back to the current situation. Right. You were going to show everyone what you had discovered. Which, not to brag, but it was pretty impressive. You managed to sweep the majority of the trash into a trash bag and put it off to the side before tripping over papers on the way to the door.

“Hey,” you said with a frazzled smile when you threw the door open and saw the entire gang standing there.

“When was the last time you slept?” Anika asked.

“Or showered,” Chad chimed in.

“Just get in here,” you said as you stepped aside. “I’m definitely on to something.”

“Good, because I have my own theories,” Mindy said with a smile. She was the first to enter.

You said hi to every one of them as they came in. Anika gave you a chaste kiss on the cheek and Quinn patted your unhurt arm. When Tara finally walked in, at the very end of the line, she gave you a look that you… couldn’t quite describe. She didn’t look sad. You supposed “worried” was a much better descriptor.

“You didn’t even change out of the shirt,” she said, pulling lightly on the NYPD shirt that you were still sporting.

“Shit,” you mumbled, “you’re right.”

“Go change,” she said, and you nodded before shutting and locking the door behind her.

“Get settled,” you told everyone as you walked into your room. You left the door open as you dug for something to wear. “All ‘a youse stayed safe, right?” You called.

“Safe and sound,” Anika called back.

“Good,” you said, tossing the NYPD shirt onto the bed. You were still trying to orient the new shirt as you walked back into the living room. “I’ve got some information you’re all going to love.”

“Who is that guy staring at us from across the alley?” Chad asked.

“What?” You said as you finally pulled the shirt over your head. You walked over to the window to see who he was talking about. “Oh, that’s Tony.”

“Who?” Sam asked.

“My older brother,” you said, shooting a wave at him. He waved back and smiled. “After the other night, I asked him to keep watch. His bedroom window watches the fire escape outside my room.”

“How many brothers do you even have?” Quinn asked, mostly to herself.

“Five,” you answered anyway, “and two sisters.”

“Are you fucking serious?” Tara asked incredulously.

“What can I say,” you shrugged. “We’re Catholic.”

“And you trust Tony?” Mindy asked. “Like really trust him?”

“With my life,” you said. “Now, everyone sit down, I’ve got a few things to show you.” You looked around. “Where’s Ethan?”

“Econ,” Chad answered.

You looked around for a moment, collecting your thoughts. “Alright then,” you said. “Mindy, would you like to enthrall us with your theories while I get my stuff situated?”

“I would love to,” she said with a smile as she stood up in front of everyone.

You listened to Mindy’s talk about sequels and remakes and upping the budget and yada yada. It was all very flashy, very out there, but you could respect it. If anyone would know what was going on, it would be Mindy. And she managed to fill more than enough time while you finished pulling everything up on your laptop and hooking it up to the projector on the ceiling.

“Now we shall hear your theories,” Mindy said as she practically handed you the floor.

“Not necessarily theories,” you said, “but I dug up some dirt.”

“And how did you manage to do that?” Chad asked as he leaned back against your couch.

“Well, Chadwick,” you said, ignoring the glare he sent you, “I learned from a very reliable source.”

“Gale is their godmother,” Sam explained.

“And my sister Martha is a tech guru,” you said as you pulled up your powerpoint presentation, “so I learned from the best.”

“Did you turn this into a TED Talk?” Quinn asked with a tilt of her head.

“Why yes I did, Quinn, thank you for asking,” you said as you pulled up the first slide.

“How long is this presentation?” Tara asked.

“Long,” you said with a smile, “so buckle up.”

You went over everything you had managed to dig up for the past 18 hours. From all the Reddit conspiracies, to possible motives. You pointed out how all the theories of Sam being the killer had all managed to come from different sock puppet accounts, which all connected to two different real accounts, which shared IP addresses.

“And you learned how to find that out from your sister?” Anika asked as she leaned forward on her thighs.

“Yes I did,” you said, “and she’s never wrong.”

“Who do the two accounts belong to?” Tara asked.

“Now that I don’t know yet,” you sighed. “But we got our two potential Ghostfaces right there.”

“Two?” Sam asked.

“There’s almost always two,” you said. “Except for, uh, what’s his name,” you shuffled through some of the papers on your table. “Ah, that Roman guy.”

Everyone looked at you with a mix of shock, confusion, and amazement. And maybe a little bit of fear.

“I told you I did my research,” you defended. “Unlike you guys, I didn’t grow up with Ghostface as part of my school curriculum.”

“So you did all this just to tell us you still don’t know who it is?” Chad asked.

“I’m not a detective, I’m doing my best,” you huffed. “It’s more than that pig Bailey ever did.” You instantly looked at Quinn. “No offense, doll.”

“None taken,” she said with a shrug.

“But I do think this means he’s going after you, Sam,” you said. “He painted a bullseye on you with the Reddit bullshit. Must’ve pissed someone off.”

“Seems that’s all I ever do,” she said with a huff.

Everyone got to talking, going over what you had managed to find out. You continued shuffling through your papers, seeing if there was anything else you had left out. All the adrenaline and caffeine was starting to wear off and your eyes were fuzzy, but you could focus long enough to read. Mostly.

Your phone vibrated on the table, and you looked down. From the area code, the call was from the Bronx. If anything, one of your siblings got a new phone and was calling you to let you know. It had happened far too many times anyway, you shouldn’t have been surprised.

“Quit breakin’ your goddamn phone,” you said immediately after answering.

“Hello, Y/N.”

You froze.

“What’s wrong?” He asked. “Cat got your tongue?”

Everyone was still talking amongst themselves. You didn't know if you were supposed to tell them about the call or not. No one was looking at you, so you walked over to the window. When Tino looked over, you signed for him to watch.

"You and your buddy showin' up tonight?" You asked. "Or are you both a couple 'a pussies?"

"You're bold," he said. "Have you learned much from your research?"

"A bit," you said. You were eying the streets below. Surely he was somewhere close.

"Then I'll ask you the single most important question," he said. "What's your favourite scary movie?"

“Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure,” you said. “Large Marge will haunt me till I die.”

“You think you’re funny.”

“My Ma told me I’m a natural comedian.” He wasn’t in the alley. Where was he?

“You ever seen Stab?”

“Not really,” you said. You were vaguely aware of the fact that everyone had fallen silent. “I think they're insensitive."

"Insensitive?" He chuckled. "How chivalrous."

"You gonna play your game or not?" You asked, finally turning back around to see everyone staring at you.

Oh no.

"Did you check Garret’s room when you got home last night?"

Your eyes darted to Garret’s closed bedroom door. No. No you hadn’t checked it last night. The phone fell from your hand as you vaulted over the armchair in your way. Someone was calling to you, but you couldn’t hear what they were saying. Without any hesitation or sense of self preservation, you threw the door open.

No one was in there.

“Shit,” you mumbled to yourself.

“Don’t go in there!” Mindy shouted at you from the living room. “Have you never seen a horror movie?”

“Just shut up,” you called back. “Get out,” you said when you grabbed one of the baseball bats you kept in every room of the apartment. “Tony’s apartment number is 413, it’s a four floor walk-up.”

“I’m staying,” Tara said.

“Come on,” Chad said; you hoped he grabbed her and forced her to leave.

This is a stupid idea, you thought as you stalked your way to Garret’s closed closet door. Sure, you had a bat, but you had no idea what you were going to do if that fucker was in there. What, you were going to just bludgeon him to death? Yeah, that would look great on your rap sheet.

“Here goes nothin’,” you mumbled as you turned the doorknob and threw the door open, the bat primed and ready.

No one was in there either.

“What the-”

-screams came from the front door.

Shit. 

You tripped over Garret’s duffel bag that he had left and hit the floor with a hard *thud*. The stitches on your bicep pulled tight. You could hear your pulse racing in your ears as you pushed yourself back up to your feet and ran out of the room.

Just in time to see Ghostface pulling the knife out of Anika’s stomach.

You saw Mindy not too far away holding her bleeding arm, but you couldn’t find anyone else. That was probably a good thing.

Ghostface lifted the knife again.

The wood of the bat rubbed harshly against the skin of your palms as you swung. It hit his head with a hollow *thunk*, and he groaned and fell to the ground. You didn't recall crossing the living room.

“Go,” you shouted as you pushed Anika and Mindy into your room and slammed the door behind the three of you.

Mindy helped Anika onto your bed and pushed against the wound that you could now see went all the way from her sternum to her stomach. Your own stomach twisted at the sight. The muscles in your legs were frozen even as your mind ran rampant.

Something grabbed the doorknob.

You dropped the bat and lunged, slamming into the door right as it opened. Your hands wrapped around the doorknob as it twisted erratically. The metal started to heat up from the friction and you could feel it burning the skin on your palms.

"We're going to die," Anika cried.

"Try to stay positive," Mindy told her even as she was looking around the room for… you didn't know what.

The doorknob twisted again. The door opened slightly, and you slammed your shoulder into it again. Why didn't you fix the fucking lock when you had the chance last week?

"If we get out of this alive, I'm fucking strangling you-"

-The gleam of a knife shut you up and took over everything in your sight.

You followed as it pulled out, leaving a hole in your door right beside your head along with a light smear of blood.

"Get out," you said, your eyes still glued to the blood smear on your door.

"What?" Mindy asked 

"Fire escape leads to Tony's room," you said.

"Tara will kill me if I leave you-"

-the knife drove through the door again. You jumped back but felt a sharp sting in your hip.

The door tried to fly open again. You yelped, but pushed against it harder. Your bare feet dug into the carpet and you could feel the strain in your thighs.

"Give me the chair," you ordered, waving your hand vaguely in the direction of a metal folding chair.

Someone shuffled around the room, and in seconds you felt the chair in your outstretched hand. You placed it underneath the doorknob.

The knife pierced the door again.

And again.

And again.

"Come on," you heard Mindy say to Anika. At least you assumed that was who she was talking to.

Anika groaned, but the sounds meant they were moving. Hopefully to your window. Your pulse was rushing in your ear.

The doorknob jiggled again.

"Grab my hand!" Okay, that was Sam, the window was open.

The knife came into your field of view.

Oh god this was so stupid!

"Y/N, come on!"

Tara?

The doorknob quit moving and the room was enveloped with a deafening silence.

You let go of the doorknob slowly and took a few hesitant steps back. The heel of your foot hit the bat, and you reached down to pick it up without taking your eyes off the door.

"Just get out here!"

The grain of the wood rubbed your palms raw as you tightened your grip on the handle. It hung in the air above your shoulder, ready to swing.

I dare you to try it.

"Tara wait!"

Someone stepped onto the fire escape before climbing into the window. You didn't dare turn from the door. A familiar hand touched your ear. It stung.

"You're bleeding," Tara said softly.

You didn't answer.

There was banging in the living room. You twisted your hands around the bat and planted your feet. So help you god, if Ghostface even so much as sneezed you would-

"-It's Bailey!"

Your heart skipped a beat. Maybe two.

"We have paramedics downstairs," he continued, "open the door."

Your eyes stayed on the door even as you toed the chair, pulling it until it fell to the ground with a *clang*.  Your grip on the bat tightened as you watched the doorknob twist.

Detective Bailey stepped into the room, hands held up in surrender.

You exhaled sharply and felt all the muscles in your body relax.

The bat fell to the ground as your vision went fuzzy. Tara's hand fell and rested on your hip.

You supposed you had just survived attack number two.

[lycanpunk666]

Out of topic but who the fuck is Jimmy and what he have done?? (I just know he's probably a horrible person and is hated by half of the fandom)

Genuinely horrible disgusting guy. Okay so explaining all of this essentially involves every Mouthwashing spoiler conceivable but essentially the plot of mouth washing is centered around Jimmy and his horrible, selfish decisions. And I'm going to need you to think critically about his character and read my whole post and not just highlight a couple of words and immediately disengage. The cast consists of a 5-person team of people making a cargo delivery (Curly the Captain, Anya the Nurse, Jimmy the Co-Pilot, Swansea the Mechanic, and Daisuke the Intern) through space on a trip that was supposed to last about a year and a half or so. Jimmy sexually assaulted Anya (foreshadowed first with Anya mentioning to Curly in a flashback saying something along the lines of "Did you know that the nurse's office is locked but the bedrooms aren't?") leaving her pregnant. This is the catalyst for every single event in the game through a bunch of chain reactions, but essentially, Anya ended up telling Curly, who said he'd do anything to protect her but ended up trying to just keep things "neutral" after talking to Jimmy, who said he'd "fix things" because he's mainly spiraling about what would happen to HIM once they landed, and started ranting to Curly about a story the news would make about nobody on the ship surviving the trip in some tragic accident. Curly doesn't think Jimmy's serious and he's generally trying to figure out a way to defuse the situation and he's willing to sweep a lot of what's going on under the rug for his friend. Jimmy ends up crashing the ship on purpose, resulting in the fire that permanently disfigured and disabled curly and left him unable to speak (Jimmy framed him for crashing the ship, and Curly, not being able to speak, not being able to convince anyone otherwise. But people don't hate Curly at all on the ship, since to them, he's a good captain. Jimmy's not too pleased about this whole situation at all but he keeps talking about how he's responsible for everything because he's the captain now (and he's being haunted by hallucinations of crying babies and horses) and he's deliberately avoiding everything that has to do with thinking critically about what he did to Anya and is instead focusing on what he did to Curly especially. The crew slowly starves and slowly goes insane, there's pretty much nothing to eat anymore but the cargo they have, mouthwash, something specific happens but I don't entirely remember what (I think it was Anya trying to OD on purpose to abort her pregnancy and ending up dying) but it resulted in Daisuke getting injured to the point of no recovery and getting PUT DOWN by Swansea, Jimmy shooting Swansea in the head, and one of the last scenes in the game involves Jimmy cutting off Curly's leg and feeding it to him. My description here is genuinely not doing the game justice, there's a lot more to it and a lot more nuances that I missed here ("I hope this hurts", the lack of autonomy with the painkillers, the surprise birthday party, Jimmy's obsession with Curly that's a bit more subtle, the fact that Anya's character is purposefully muted due to Jimmy's perspective of her in the game, there's so much more) but yeah holy moly this game is insane. (It's less of a game and more of an interactive movie) Jimmy is such an insanely interesting character, he's like a train wreck given human form. Absolutely understandable that people hate him. But by god it is sssssSSSSSSO repetitive to hear nothing BUT how much people hate him.

[ppumeonae-bigvibe]

under his watchful gaze

↖ navigation: ateez masterlist || main masterlist 

pairing: mingi x gn! reader

↬ tags: implied that mingi and reader are childhood friends (about why they are roommates now the author herself isn't too sure just roll with it), you can assume reader and mingi are going to the same school, mingi is 3 years older than reader in this one

summary: you have a guardian angel that watches you while you sleep. that's mingi

word count: 807 words

a/n: can't put any labels on what mingi is to the reader because the agenda of this fic changed course MULTIPLE times, the bonus scene will explain a bit of the backstory (it was only added because the story wouldn't have made sense without the backstory)

a loud knock on mingi's door grabbed his attention and he swivels around in his chair to face you. he removes his headphones, game paused in the background. you stood shyly by his doorframe, greeting him all while clad in cozy sleepwear, "hey mingi, i'm not disturbing you right?"

he shakes his head, "no, what's up?" you waved your hands in front of you, "oh, uhm. i just wanted to tell you that if you're going to play games, could you tone it down a bit? i'm gonna head to bed now, i've got an early class tomorrow." you shoot him a half grimace half smile at the mention of your class.

unfortunately for him, his friends were counting on him to tank a match. he clears his throat and gave you a curt nod.

"yeah, i'll try. have a good rest." he bids you goodbye and his door closes with a whoosh, mechanism clicking shut. mingi tears his gaze away from the door and returns his focus back to the game.

"mingi what's taking you so long?!" he rolls his eyes at the way his gaming mates hollered at him.

"my bad. someone was talking to me. let's go for another round?" mingi cracks his knuckles, before poising them over his keyboard.

"that's the spirit! one more win!"

-----

"ah damn we almost got that team!" mingi groans, rubbing his eyes. "yeah no shot. we nearly got obliterated! if mingi didn't advise us to defend our base i think we would have lost more." his teammates chatter idly, agreeing to take a quick bio-break. mingi stretched his legs out, and wonders if you were asleep now.

picking up his phone, he notices that you sent him a message on social media just a second ago. a second chime signals a new message and he clicks on the notification.

just a bunch of animal reels from this evening...and wait, why were you online?

mingi shoots you a quick text, somewhat apologetic.

mingi: was i too loud?

a small grin appears on his face when he spots that familiar green dot beside your profile icon. you were still awake. awake and purposely avoiding his texts.

mingi: ahem.

mingi: excuse me, but i thought you said you were going to sleep 2 hours ago??

you: well uhm...i couldn't sleep ;-;

mingi: come to my room?

-----

a while later he hears his door open and he turns to look at your tired form, "you seriously need to sleep, like now." he knows you can't quip back at him for he had no classes the next day. he removes his headphones on one side to hear you better.

"well! i just can't, what about it?" you leaned against the ajar door, crossing your arms in front of you. mingi couldn't help but burst out laughing at how you were pouting, clearly annoyed for not being able to sleep.

"why didn't you just come and sleep in my bed, just like last time?" he pats the empty bed behind him and you flushed, sputtering, "i...i mean! it's not...it's not like we're kids again or whatever." you locked your hands behind you, averting your gaze.

"mingi? hey! we're gonna start another round." his friend's voice called out through his left ear and he unmutes himself to speak, "give me 5 minutes." in one swift motion, he gets out of his chair and drags you into his room, pushing you down onto his bed all while ignoring your protests.

you huffed, mumbling under your breath, "it's so embarrassing that you still have to coddle me to bed at this age." you surprisingly let mingi tuck you in, pulling the covers to your shoulders. he takes your phone from you, earning him yet another eye roll from you.

"can't stand you being grumpy the next day, so you better rest now. if your bed doesn't work, then my bed it is." he dims the bedside lamp, the only source of light being his monitor in the room. he squats down beside you and you flipped to your side to gaze at him. he locks eyes with you, a wry smile growing on his face.

"are you afraid i'm gonna let the whole world know that you can't sleep without me around? silly twerp. get some proper rest, not some half-assed 3 hour sleep on a school day." you reached out from under the covers to flick his forehead, accepting your fate. mingi knew you couldn't say no either.

"fine. goodnight mingi."

-----

mingi keeps one side of his headphones on, occasionally hearing you toss and turn in his bed. he mutes himself for the rest of the rounds, choosing to text his teammates in-game instead. mingi switches to the quieter keyboard and mouse to avoid waking you up. in the end he couldn't focus for long--not when you were in the same space as him-- and quits the game.

"i'll go off first. see you all same time tomorrow?" chimes of "sure thing" and "see you" came from his fellow gamers and he logged off. mingi ambles over to you, lying down beside you. he stares at you intently, every rise and fall of your chest under his covers made him happy knowing you were getting rest.

"look who's sound asleep now huh." he murmured under his breath, warm hand gingerly carding through your hair and you stirred from his touch. he hides his pleased chuckle behind his other hand when he realizes that you were nuzzling into his touch, seemingly unresponsive after that sudden movement.

"goodnight to you too."

-----

bonus:

10 year old mingi was shaken awake from his sleep and blearily he reaches out to switch on his bedside lamp.

"w-what..." mingi glances in your direction as you perched at the end of his bed, your half-lidded eyes meeting his barely opened ones. you fiddled with the ends of his blanket, "i can't sleep. mommy and daddy are talking loudly again."

he sighs, opening his blanket for you to crawl in. you slipped into the space beside him, and he drapes the blanket over you. "don't kick me or i'll push you off the bed." mingi threatens jokingly. he flicks off the light and the two of you lay down in silence, the hum of the ceiling fan the only things both of you could hear.

"i'm sorry." you whispered. even though mingi's eyes were closed shut, he can feel your intense stare through his lids. "what are you sorry for? auntie and uncle were nice enough to take care of me until my parents come back from their trip. so it is also my duty to take care of you when they can't." mingi doesn't know if you understood what that loaded statement meant, but you seemed satisfied at the fact that he was beside you and that was all that mattered to the 7 year old you.

he gently pats you, and you fell asleep under his care.

@ppumeonae-bigvibe 's work ; likes and reblogs are appreciated <3

[vibratingskull]

What would you think of maybe Thrawn x Reader on a camping trip to somewhere scenic and isolated? Maybe on vacation, away from the stresses of work? I'm definitely imagining Thrawn shirtless and chopping firewood, for some eye candy. Maybe like, half fluff/half spicy?

🥺 pretty please?

(my love as a gift, regardless of if you write this!)

Of course, anything for you my sweet ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

ThrawnxF!reader

Tags: Winter vacation, fluff, fingering

“Ch’acah, we have arrived.” Thrawn pats your thigh to wake you up.

You rise up in a jolt, still half asleep. You were so comfortable pressed against Thrawn's back, holding him tight on the speeder, his body's higher warmth still spreading to you past the thick leather jacket he wears. 

You rub your eyes and wipe a bit of drool off your mouth and discover a wooden cabin under a thick layer of snow. Thrawn already jumped off the bike to get the luggages as you hug yourself to shield yourself from the biting cold. He was so warm…

“You are shivering, Vir. Let’s get inside.” He invites gallantly.

You jump on the ground, leafing through the bunch of keys you have. You haven't come here in decades, you almost forgot your grand aunt bought that cabin in the middle of nowhere.

You would have come in summer under a blazing sun but you saw how Thrawn's eyes were shining when you told him everything froze in winter in the region. You hoped for a resort near a beach for those vacation, but seeing him getting excited by the prospect of living through a cold climate for some weeks made you cave in, for your Chiss…

As much as Thrawn shows excitement of course, which is always in moderation. 

But enduring the cold and wind is worth it if Thrawn gets something reminding him of his homeworlds.

You enter the key in the door and push the heavy block of wood to enter the modest abode. It is completely dark and cold. You search for a lightswitch on the wall until you find it and flip it.

Nothing.

You flip it again.

Still dark.

“We may have an electricity problem.” You annonce.

Thrawn puts the luggages down in the largest room, consisting of a kitchenette, a sofa, a double bed and a fireplace.

Real small cabin, you see.

You mingle with a heater mounted on the wall, to no avail.

“Let’s start the chimney.” Thrawn says. “Let’s get some light and warmth.”

You go around the cabin in search of the wood reserve, finding the ax in the meantime. You find back Thrawn securing the bike in the nightfall against a tree. You don’t know who would come lost themself in this forest to steal a speeder bike, but security first you suppose.

“No cutted logs, but I found the ax.” 

He nods, standing up. He is only wearing his leather jacket while you're wrapped in the puffiest winter coat you ever saw, a heavy lana scarf and some gloves. 

“I will see the wood, go collect some ice.” He instructs

“Why?” you tilt your head, blowing hot air on your hands.

“For the bath.” He says with a thin smile.

You take a hammer from the top case and a very large bucket. You wave at Thrawn as you go, looking at him chopping wood with application and venture a little bit deeper in the forest. If your memory serves you right there must be a lake not too far away…

You break the ice with the hammer and collect enough to fill the bucket. It is a really, really large bucket and it gets really, really heavy. You have all the pain in the world carrying it back to the cabin, especially with this hindering coat. You take double the time it took you to reach the lake to come back.

But you’re not disappointed, far from it.

Because when you finally reach the cabin, you raise your eyes from the heavy bucket to discover Thrawn, still cutting logs, bare chested and muscles glistening with a thin layer of sweat shining under the rising stars. 

You are so surprised and enthralled you stop dead in your tracks, completely hypnotized by that scene. You cannot help but admire his form, his powerful muscles flexing so wonderfully under the new moonlight. 

You remained silent, eyes wide open, arms holding on desperately on the heavy bucket that started trembling in your hands. He catches a glimpse of you mid swift, sliding a log in too with such force and power the two parts fly on the side. He lays down the ax to turn to you, gasping for air, his breath forming steamy clouds at his mouth. You see his large chest rising up and down rapidly and you imagine his heart beat racing in his rib cage. 

You close your agape mouth with a gulp, shaking your head back to reality. 

“I found ice.” You inform gingerly, trying to keep your eyes to his ember eyes and not his mouth watering chest and abdominals.

Maker… He is such an athlete! He has been carved by the gods in pure marble!

“Good.” He nods, already getting back his breath under control, “Put it in the chimney, we are going to melt it for the bath.”

You greet your teeth as you carry the bucket inside. Right behind you Thrawn gathered the wood he cut and places them in the fireplace. He starts the fire as you get rid of your heavy coat. You take one of the furry plaid and lay it on his naked shoulders, he raises his head to meet your gaze, a silent ‘thank you’ in his eyes.

“You’re going to catch a cold in this outfit.” You smile gently.

You just see a drop of sweat rolling from his pac to roll on his muscular stomach, making you gulp again. He doesn’t close the plaid over him, only holding the sides with the tip of his fingers, letting you appreciate his whole carved bust as he rises back on his feet. The red and yellow flames bounce beautifully on his deep blue skin, creating delightful tones and shades dancing on his skin. You breathe deeply through your nose, trying your best not to drool at that sight.

He turns his head to you, completely lost in your admiration of his body, and smiles thinly before booping the tip of your nose with his knuckle. You wince and wrinkle your nose in reaction, almost sneezing.

“I think we still have some hot cocoa in the thermos. You are shivering, Ch’acah.”

He invites you to sit on the sofa in front of the burning fire and brings the two cups and the thermos bottle, pouring you a cup of the fuming drink. As you blow on the steaming cup in your hand he sits beside you, throwing the side of the plaid over your own shoulders. You smile and snuggle against his warmer body with a sigh of contentment.

“I know you wished to go to the beach for those vacations.” Thrawn says after a very long moment of comfortable silence, “I am sorry, Ch’acah.”

You kiss his shoulder before laying your head on it.

“No need Thrawn. I saw how happy and interested you were in this location.”

“And I am thankful to you for accepting.” He brushes his cheek against the top of your head.

“If you are happy, it is good enough for me.” You assure, sighing contented as you finally started to warm up.

“We will go to that resort you saw, cheo vir, I promise you.”

“And we could come back here each winter, if you wish!” You propose.

“Thank you, love.” He kisses your hair tenderly.

You press yourself against his warm body, feeling his arm circling your shoulders, pressing you tighter against himself. You deeply inhale the natural musk of your Chiss with glee, letting it invade your lungs with great pleasure.

He is so, so warm…

And smells so, so good.

His thumb comes caressing the plump of your cheek softly.

“I love you, Thrawn.” You let escape in the softness and intimacy of the moment.

“I love you too, Ch’acah.” He responds with a melodious tone.

You sip your cups, letting the heavy and thick chunks of ice slowly melt in the bucket over the fire. He keeps caressing your cheek with his thumb, softly, lightly, tenderly…

You hear him purring lowly, feeling the waves through the skin of your cheek. You close your eyes, comfortable and relaxed.

“Do you like it here?” You ask.

“It is quite rudimentary, but yes. It brings back some soft memories.” He admits.

“Good, that’s what I wanted for you.” you press your cheek on his shoulder.

“Thank you, Ch’acah. You take such good care of me.”

You raise your head to look him in the eyes. His so beautiful crimson eyes.

“Because you do it too…” You whisper.

His fingers travel from your cheek to your chin, tilting it to give him a better access to your lips. He leans forward and captures them delicately, pressing sweet kisses on your lips, purring deeply at the sensual contact. In place of purring you moan for his ears, mewling alluringly for his pleasure.

He parts from you with a satisfied sigh, looking into your eyes. His face is stern and unreadable but his eyes are spilling love and adoration. He gently puts a strand of your hair behind your ear before taking your cheek in his palm. You mewl and snuggle against his warm palm.

“I could drown in your eyes.” He murmurs with his deep baritone voice.

“Your eyes set fire to my soul.” You respond.

He kisses your forehead lovingly.

“We should take the water off the fire before it boils.” He simply says, leaving your embrace.

He lets the plaid fall off his large shoulders like a cap in a regal movement, letting you admire his magnificently sculpted back and well defined shoulder blades. You feel your throat drying at that simple sight.

“Will it be sufficient?” You ask tilting your head.

“It is plenty.”

You hardly see how it is enough to fill a bathtub…

He seizes the heavy bucket, flexing his powerful biceps just for you and easily carry it to the ridiculously small bathroom.

This room is hilariously small.

There is no bathtub, not even a shower. There is only a larger than usual metallic barrel next to a crude, but serviceable toilet. Thrawn easily lift the bucket and pour the fuming water in the barrel, filling it up.

“Oh this is really, really rudimentary.” You concede.

“We will be a bit squeezed in here, but it will be quite… pleasant.” He turns to you.

Your gaze travel between the barrel to Thrawn, eyes round.

“You want us to take our bath together, in… this?”

“Will it be a problem?” He asks, opening his pants.

You purse your lips.

You hardly see how Thrawn could squeeze his large and tall body in this barrel, so your two bodies at the same time…

“Hum…”

“I thought it would be agreeable to bathe together, in each other's arms.” He presents his argument.

“I mean…” You hesitate.

You turn back to him to see him naked in all his glory and immediately avert your eyes, suddenly shy.

Which is quite weird, you've been seen naked more than once. And you always loved it, a lot!

You feel him come to press his naked form against your body, gently opening the buttons of your thick lana cardigan.

“Come bath with me, Ch’acah.” He whispers in your ear, making you shudder instantly.

You gulp, feeling your body temperature skyrocketing by the second. He pulls the cardigan off your shoulders  gently, nibbling at your ear. You gasp at the touch of his breath on the shell of your ear, sending shivers down your spine and pussy. You bite your lips and take your shirt off while he unbutton your pants before pulling them down, letting you in your bra and tights. You fill his warm hands snaking their way back up your legs, caressing and squeezing the flesh as they rise. 

This is not an alluring stocking but lana tights with extravagant colors and patterns as they tend to be. You hear a low chuckle behind you.

“I am sorry, you may have hoped for a thin shaded stocking.” You mumble. “I am sorry.”

“Not at all, Ch’acah. I know you cannot endure cold climates as well as I. These eccentric patterns and colors are also pleasant to see.”

“I was so cold on the ship.” You admit. “I needed a new layer.”

“I will make sure you remain warm during our stay.” He says lowly, darkly, seductively…

You feel his lips on your lower back brushing the thin sensitive skin like a butterfly, making you shiver again. He stands back to his full height and opens your bra expertly, with a snap of the hooks and his warm hands come forth and grabs your tits delicately. You breathe through your nose, mouth agape as he gently kneads the round mounds of flesh, before making your nipples roll between his master fingers, tugging on them softly.

“I love unclothing you.” He whispers again, “I know really well what I will found, but it is like I am rediscovering our body each time, like a new first time.” and he bites down your ear.

You yelp, to his pleasure.

“Come in with me, sweet thing.” He kisses your shoulder and leave you to enter the barrel.

Somehow, someway he does enter the barrel entirely, sitting down in the warm water, his legs wide apart to leave you space. He extends his hand to you invitingly.

You get rid off your tights and panties quickly and enter the fuming, hot water. Miraculously you manage to both fit in the barrel, squeezed against the other, but surprisingly comfortable nonetheless. Your back is pressed against his chest as you sit between his legs. 

“How is it?” He asks.

“Hot.”

“Too hot?” He worries.

‘Against a body such as yours? It is scorching hot’ you think.

“It is agreeable.” You correct, getting comfortable against his chest.

You sigh of comfort, slowly relaxing in the fuming water.

“See? We could fit without any difficulties.”

“I wouldn’t have bet on it!” You retort.

He kisses the top of your head, pecking your hair, hugging your body tightly in his arms. He crosses his legs before yours, imprisoning you between his embrace completely.

“Lay on me, Ch’acah, I am warmer.” He invites.

You let your head fall back on his shoulder with a moan. One of his hands starts drawing circles on your arm while the other one sneakily traces its way on your stomach and goes south. He keep kissing your ear and temples as his hand keeps going until it scoops your sex in his palm. Air gets stuck in your throat as you feel him dressing down your cunt with his large hand. One single finger curls up, trailing your slit until it flicks your clit at the top. You immediately jolt back, and in doing so compress his cock between your two bodies. He hisses in return in pain and pleasure.

“I’m sorry!” You immediately present your excuses.

“Do.not.move.an.inch.” He orders. “Remain here.”

“O-Ok…”

He trails your slit once again, before going at it seriously, pushing past your folds and massaging your entrance with the pad of his finger.

“You are already gaping, I can feel you pulsing against my finger.” He notes satisfied.

“You are teasing me, of course I am going to react!” You defend yourself.

He adds a second finger at the circles he traces around your entrance, applying sweet pressures here and there, titillating your cunny from time to time. His fingers rise to your pearl and knead it thoroughly, adding pressure, making it roll, flicking it repeatedly. Your legs start trembling and you try to close them, but it only imprison his hand in place.

He licks your ear with his warm, wet tongue and a guttural growl. His second hand leaves  your arm to caress and grope your breast, kneading it lovingly, weighting them in his hand, appreciating their roundness and fullness with a hum of approval.

His fingers go back south and one enters you, gently, letting your entrance time to embrace the girth of his digit. He pushes it further, knuckles deep and immediately grazes at your gummy spot, caressing it and crossing it without missing a beat.

You can feel all your south muscles contracting at the shockwaves of pleasure currently spreading in your body, squeezing his finger inside.

“That is the kind of reaction I enjoy…” He says amused and pleased.

To prove his point a second finger enters you deeply, stretching you wide open. His fingers are like his hands: large and long, and a trial to take in, but they give you so much pleasure they are worth any struggle. He spreads his fingers wide to stretch you more and more until your cunny muscles are at their maximum. Shuddering terribly, you hold on his arms for support.

“Can you take a third one, Cheo vir? For me…” He purrs deeply, enjoying himself tremendously.

Mouth agape, gasping, only a strangled moan escape you as an answer. He kisses your cheek and decide for you.

“Yes you can, sweet thing.”

And he pushes the third in. This time you are at your maximum. You are fully stuffed and feel your pussy compressing his three fingers tight, threatening to cut the blood flow in them.

“I love how your tight pussy always struggles to take what I offer you. Even fingers are too much… Somedays I wonder how you can take my cock in your sweet little cunt. But you always do. To my utmost pleasure.” He praises, licking your neck all the way up. “You are so good for me, Ch’acah, always pushing your limits to please me.”

He thoroughly massages your pussy as he speaks, caressing and stroking any hidden spots inside your pussy, sending powerful waves of pleasure in your core.

“I am so stuffed!” You manage to let out in a gasp.

“Are you?” He muses, “Already?” And he pushes his finger deeper until their whole length is inside.

You pant terribly, digging your nails in his arms. You are so stretched! So full! So filled! You cannot take anything more, it is impossible, you would explode in a million pieces!

“You are strangling my fingers so much, sweet thing.” He breathes lowly, “This is so… delectable.” You feel his hips moving behind you, his big, lengthy cock brushing your lower back from side to side, getting as much friction as he can.

He circles your G spot, scratching the itch and resumes the flicking of your clit, he is not one to neglect such an important aspect of womanly pleasure, quite the contrary.

You moan and mewl uncontrollably under his caress as he deep massage your pussy while licking and kissing your neck and shoulder.

“Maker!” You cry out.

You feel your pussy clenching and convulsing furiously around his large fingers while your nervous clit pulsates powerfully.

“Come for me, Ch’acah. Come hard for me...” He whispers seductively in your ear.

You come in a jolt, the pleasure suddenly exploding in your sex like fireworks forcing you to curl over yourself, but Thrawn holds you down with his mighty arm. Your eyes roll inside your skull and your toes curl deliciously as the fire spreads in your veins slowly to your nerves ending.

You tremble, but not of cold, but of pure, raw shock. The aftermath of your climax slowly subsiding, you relax bit by bit, relaxing easily in his arms with a sigh, slouching in his embrace.

“Thank you, Cheo vir.” Thrawn praises you, “You came hard and good. Just as I wanted.” He kisses your cheek again, purring loudly, so much you feel vibrations in your back.

As much as a hard, long warm shaft in your back…

Oh.

Oh…

He rolls his hips again, brushing his erection against your back gently with a hum. You slide your hand between your two bodies to stroke and caress him but he stops you.

“No. Leave it.”

“Are you sure?” You ask nicely. “You made me cum, I should reciprocate.”

“Not now.” He decides, pressing you tighter against him, “It is so nervous and sensitive like that, it is really pleasant.” He moves his hips back and forth gently, “I quite like it. Let me appreciate it a bit longer…”

@bluechiss @thrawnalani @justanothersadperson93 @al-astakbar @thrawnspetgoose @readinglistfics @elise2174 @debonaire-princess @twilekchiss @pencil-urchin @ineedazeezee @mssbridgerton @dance-like-russia-isnt-watching @Cortisolcosplay, @obbicrystaleo, @germie2037

[not-5-rats]

BUG QUESTIONS/SCENARIOS!!!!

(I've got so much to ask, I'm so sorry (no I'm not))

1) Acting AU

Has your bug ever improvised a scene? If so what scene was it?

2) What's the 'silliest' thing that irritates your bug?

3) Can your bug dance? 🐛🕺<- I love this sm

If yes, where did they learn

If no, would they like to learn?

4) Daisy (Chez's youngest sister) comes running up to them and pushes a bunch of daisies into their hands

"You's nice, you take flowers for being nice"

She then runs away to get more daisies, gives you those flowers, goes to get more, repeat

5) You know I can't ask questions without some form of angst :3 (tw headless corpse ig)

(A/N bug is referring to your bug cba writing 'your bug' eveytime)

Your bug and Chester are out in the swamps fishing, they're having nice conversation, discussion interests, the Gator Boys and the other bugs

They had had pretty good luck today, as shows by the basket of fish sitting in the middle of their boat. Bug suddenly felt their fishing line hook onto something, they assumed it was a clump of seaweed or something to reeled it in to clear it and throw whatever muck it had caught back into the water

When they pulled it up they were initially a bit puzzled but when they saw the whole thing they realised the mortifying truth, it was a rotting corpse, a headless rotting corpse.

They pulled the body onto the boat and Chez looked down at it, at first he was concerned because...well who wouldn't be concerned at finding a corpse but then he took a closer look at the rotting body and realised something about it

The scars covering the bodies shoulders and sides, the partially disintegrated pouch stuck to it's side and the barely visible tattoo of a fox's silhouette on the top of their back...

Chester seemed mortified, he scurried to grab something from the pouch and what he pulled out confirmed his suspicions...a rusty pocket watch with the initials M.M carved into the back. He stares at the watch before mumbling to the other bug, not looking away from the watch

"Milo...this is my brother...Milo, he died years ago, I found his head but until now I'd not found the body..."

Your bugs reaction?

(This is how he finds out his brother wasn't killed by the half-bloods, cause the scars on the neck stump don't match those on his head (will write this later))

Tags -

@rozeliyawashereyall @willowve01 @asmrbrainrot @kaiamtt @iistxrmyskyii @insignificant-anarchy @stxph-artist @aspenm00n @keyaartz @fangsshadow @rustycopper4use @piffany666 @dreamyshape @idontevenknow7878 @lunaritychuwolf @littlesiren79 @castbracelet240 @strayharmony943 @tiefling-chaos @astralbulldragon13 @threeweekinsomnia @recated @wilderrorcard @diamondzoey @fennaboysenberry @lunnats @lightdragon789 @pinkcocopuff-aqualoid @itsargyle

@puffin-smoke you will never escape the angst now

[nadas-dirthalen]

love your posts!! what are your thoughts on the secret, post-credit scene we can unlock?

Hey friendo! Thank you! 💛 Lemme try to articulate my 2am thinking lmao.

My thoughts, right now, are a FUN tangle, hahaha. In my current (second) playthrough, I am making an effort to gather as many codices and mementos as I can, plus screencapping dialogue as I am able, because of that secret ending.

Something is happening with the Forgotten Ones/the Forbidden Ones — something that has me examining all mentions of both and evaluating the potential relationship between the two. That secret ending has Anaris and his ilk written all over it... somehow. I feel it in my bones, after doing Bellara's quest finale for the second time. The ADHD pattern recognition senses are tingling.

I'm thinking that BioWare are heading toward clarifying something I've guessed at: that the Fade is the sundered collective consciousness between all Titans. The Forgotten Ones and the Forbidden Ones would be similar, then: two sets of sundered (Titan?) spirits kept trapped. But trapped where, trapped how, and trapped by whom?

I keep coming back to this mural from Trespasser.

We can see a Titan having its spirit (middle) sundered (left and right). One half produces a golden orb, like we see Mythal and Elgar'nan using in the Veilguard murals. Those are the "vessels of dreams" that get referenced: the magical foci. That half (left) is also painted around emerald waters: that's Fade imagery. The other half (right) also creates an orb, this time surrounded by stone that signifies the Abyss. But that's odd, since that would imply that half of the Titans' spirits are still underground, in the Abyss.

Trespasser says the Forbidden Ones were forbidden from taking physical shape; the Forgotten Ones are trapped down in the Abyss and are (presumably) the piece of Titans responsible for the blight. Harding says in Veilguard (as well as Solas) that it was the Titans' twisted, maddened dreams that caused the blight. So I do think there is some weight to my interpretation of that mural, and it might not just be Titan hearts down below the Deep Roads, but pieces of their broken spirits, as well.

Maybe this (a haunting in Arlathan) is referring to that, subtly: that there are spirits in the Abyss that are missing their own dreams. It's hard for me to say for certain without devouring every memento to get more of a hold on what Veilguard is telling us about the Fade in relation to the Titans, and how exactly "having their dreams stolen" works with the existing magic system. (It does work, I just need to figure out the specifics!)

The only other thing I have to go on is the revenant "the Slaughtered Pillars" says "Light and song, stolen" as a piece of its combat dialogue. "Slaughtered Pillars" represents the slain pillars of the earth — the Titans. "Light" is used all across Dragon Age to refer to the Fade. Therefore, the Titans are lamenting the loss of the Fade, which suggests they were connected before the Veil.

See how I'm going around in circles? That's because I need more specifics! Right now, I'm just going off what caught my attention during my first ~100 hours in the game.

As one last piece: I swear I saw mention that it was Solas who banished the Forbidden Ones from having physical form, but I have to do a bunch of things like finding those notes and comparing them against previous mentions in Trespasser before I have a clear answer.

I need a lot of specifics, still, clearly!

It's one of the big topics I hope to cover in my "did I get it right" followup. Unfortunately, with the DA wiki not updating (or me being allowed to contribute/edit for some reason), it's going to take me longer to compile everything.

I hope this answer suffices for now!

[just7frogsinapeoplesuit]

I just watched the second Dune movie since it's been out of theaters for a bit and wow it was. Bad. The first one was unnecessarily long and showy but it at least stuck to the plot of the book. This one felt like someone read summaries of the main plot points and just made up a bunch of stuff to go in between, and the editing was really really bad. It's actually entirely possible it might have been a decent movie in script form, but whoever pieced it together did it like a total amateur. There was no sense of time or pacing, scenes happened almost at random with no explanation, and on many occasions someone says or does something that clearly is supposed to go somewhere important or add to the scene and then it just. Doesn't.

I need to vent so, things I can remember off the top of my head:

- There is almost no suspense in the (very large number of) fight scenes simply because it is not entirely clear what is happening, why it's happening, and what we are supposed to be rooting for.

- The acting is mostly bad. Nobody sounds genuine, except when they are suddenly so genuine it's jarring.

- The choice to have half the Fremen not really believe in their culture's religion immediately undermines the entire core of the tensions in the plot and adds a really weird inconsistency to the tone to the film.

- At one point the camera briefly shows a wholeass eclipse occurring in the middle of an otherwise normal scene of people talking. It does not affect the lighting or dialogue in any way.

- The scene where Jessica becomes a reverend mother is just sad. It was probably the most profound, gripping scene in the book and instead she's behind a random rock surrounded by people who think the ceremony is bullshit and then just foams at the mouth a little and goes "ok I know things now and also my baby is a little fucked up"

- There is not, at any point, a drug-induced orgy or even a reference to one, which is just cowardice on the part of the writers

- Actually, aside from the foaming at the mouth nobody really does drugs at all. In Dune.

- Despite the enormous CGI and costuming budgets, they decided to make people's eyes blue by just adding a (highly inconsistent and sometimes barely noticeable) tint to them in post. I'm sure this was done for Acting reasons (fully blue eyes can't convey emotion as well) but it looks really cheap.

- It is never mentioned that all of the protagonists (and some of the most necessary people in the empire) are physically dependent on spice to stay alive. This feels like a ridiculous oversight given how important it is.

- At one point we pan across the hold of a harkonnen ship before a battle (not during!) and one of the soldiers is projectile vomiting across the whole screen for absolutely no reason. I did audibly laugh at this one.

- They barely explain any of the politics behind what's happening, despite that being necessary to understand half the scenes they included. I am assuming this is because CGI explosions get better ratings than making sense.

- Stilgar's only function in the entire film is to act religious and yell "lisan al gaib" every time Paul does anything. He's also the only major character with an accent, which is supposedly due to him being from the overly-religious south. That's not even subtle racism, guys, because you purposely drew attention to it.

- We are never shown anything that explains why the Fremen believe in Paul so much, other than that he can fight ok. The concept of strategy is mentioned only for the final battle, and even then barely

- Merit points for removing the homophobia from baron harkonnen's character, but docked again because they kept him as the only fat person. Not surprised here, just disappointed.

- Paul mentioning that people close to him died is treated like a "gotcha!" that makes some Fremen feel bad for him. At this point I'm pretty sure the writers did not read Dune at all.

- Most of the exposition about the water of life is done as Desert Voices Paul is hearing, except they just plainly state what he has to do in English. If you're going to have him hear magic voices at least make them slightly mysterious, this just felt lazy especially considering how vague and non-literal all of his visions are.

- The camera regularly lingers on completely unimportant things for way longer than needed. Whoever did the editing probably thought it made the film more ~artistic~. It did not. It just made things even more bumpy.

- Alia stays a fetus for the whole film and communicates with Jessica telepathically from the womb? I'm assuming they didn't want to CGI a talking baby and they're going to use her in a future film so they couldn't leave her out. It's probably less weird for people who haven't read the book, but it also speeds up the entire timeline by multiple years which is its own host of issues.

- They have a perfect opportunity to explain what the water storage is for and the Fremen's end goal (sustainable ecology), but just leave it at "the water is needed for our salvation"?? So people who haven't read the books have no idea what the goal is?? I swear they did this because they didn't want Stilgar to say anything that sounded smart

- As far as I could tell there is not a single chrysknife in the whole film.

- During the final feyd rautha fight, we clearly see Paul get stabbed in the abdomen. When he removes the knife after we wins, it's in his shoulder. Unless he got stabbed with two knives and I didn't notice because the editing was so bad.

There is way more but I am tired. Not even going to touch on all the other unnecessary changes to basic plot points. A few of them made sense, but not most.

[gomzdrawfr]

Dragon!Price x Corvid!Raven AU

This brainrot has tAKEN OVER MY HEAD I SWEAR

bonus + some story if you're interested

bonus

okay so, the idea is that Raven is...predominantly a Raven hybrid(LMAO) but I figured to incorporate some of the Crow and Magpie habits into her

Basically, Raven's been travelling around after she was nearly killed by her kind(hence the scar on her face and the single wing - also a tribute to her actual lore where her back was stabbed), barely able to survive until she stumbled upon Price's den, and WOAH THATS A LOTTA GOLD

so it started off small, where she steals some gold, just enough to survive the week, but then the curiosity grew and she finds herself back to the den, over and over again

I mean there's so much more than just gold coins, there was a bunch of other treasures alike and they're all. so. shiny.

How could she resist?

and so day by day, she explores the den, it's absolutely massive, sometimes she might even slide down those piles of coins for fun

one day a glint caught her attention, it looked like a porcelain pale owl mask, and when she tries it on it was a perfect fit, she kept it afterwards.

the owner of the den seemingly never once appeared no matter how long she waited, and so she assumes it was a long lost forgotten treasure someone had.

she didnt had the intention to steal everything no, in all honestly the den was located somewhere far and dark, and it was only accessible by a very small hole that she squeezed herself through in her full bird form.

it was a safe place to stay and so she did.

until one day when she on her usual walk and picking up a crown that the pile of gold coins shifted, and it reveals......

bright orange scales.

and an eye, which opened once the gold coins stopped.

little did she know, the owner of the den, Dragon!Price has been hibernating beneath the treasures, and now he was awaken by a pesky bird.

YES think about that one scene in Hobbit this was 100% inspired by it

some Dragon!Price hc in this au:

used to take part in battles and territorial fights, which results in many scars, especial the one in his left eyes, one of those fight eventually results him to lost a wing(yes, bluegiragi with their single wing Price for credit)

prefer to be in his hybrid form where his half human half dragon, because being a big lizard boy takes up hella space and hard to satiate his hunger

but he does hibernate as a dragon cuz well he's home, and it feels great to be weighted down by all his treasures

very greedy, if he wants something he'll get it, also dragon hoarding tendencies

havent thought about this but I reckon this so call "den" is just a big hole underneath a castle maybe - ah well just yoinking Hobbit's Lonely Mountain

also possessive :]

Raven herself has shiny fur...and he loves shiny too....so..... :p

[weebsinstash]

Ok good you've finally seen it. What gets me in atsv (at least the version I watched) Miguel isn't even stated as having and loosing a family BEFORE he just up and leaves for that other dimension. Like dude decided he wanted a different life and a family and went and took up someone else's, instead of starting his own.

I was thinking about this last night and I eventually went back and watched the scene and it's like. Yeah bro you're right they do in fact never specify if he even had a family before

In the comics, he loses his pregnant fiance, and I, assumedly with a bunch of other people, was just kind of assuming that he had the same backstory in ATSV and it was sometime after her death that he tried a second time around. I'm assuming the canon he broke by going to another universe was HIS OWN canon: as a Spider, you are apparently supposed to lose your first love/first crush and move on, but by him jumping ship into another universe, that was breaking the rules (*cough cough* "but what if Miguel realizes being with Reader in his own universe doesn't break canon and he goes apeshit with it" *cough cough*)

But GOD wouldn't it be fucked up if it really was as literal as the way he phrased it. "I found another universe where I was happy" not "I found a universe where my family survived" is kind of sus phrasing. Like yeah bro you technically uh stole the life of a completely different person and helped raise his daughter and presumedly fucked his wife

But one thing a few people have mentioned that kind of took a while to sink in was like. Him losing that second family was RECENT. He didn't form the Spider Society until sometime after Miles became Spiderman, which he's only been wearing the mask for about a year and a half. Peter B was in the flashback where Miguel lost his second family, so like. It's literally been less than two years since Miguel accidentally broke canon. This man has some piping hot FRESH TRAUMA like he's probably still in a stage of grief???

Like I understand he's an antagonist but I'll be legit angry if he becomes like monstrously evil and it becomes "oh no we gotta defeat miguel" in the third movie because his trauma and his actions are completely understandable, like he could be an antagonist but he better not be like Final Boss. Like yeah yeah "he's technically killing people by not letting people break canon" but I mean as far as he's concerned, for all that he knows, what the evidence shows and what he's lead to believe, saving one person could potentially kill an entire universe and destabilize others so like. YEAH it sucks but no one should have to explain the math. Like the man literally had a small child he was helping raise literally vanish in his own arms as she cried "dad help" and people are like "UGH MIGUEL IS EVIL" like bro at the WORST he is obsessed with making up for his sins, dude isn't DELIBERATELY tryna cause shit. Like when you really get into analysis mode you can completely understand why he's so angry at Miles, Miguel was literally chanting "no puedo mas" ie "I can't anymore" at the concept of another hole being torn in the multiverse, like he's literally shouting and throwing shit around because for him it's "oh great here we fucking go, tons and tons of people will die if I don't get this under control, when does it end, how do i fix this"

His line on top of the train really kind of cements it, where he's all "and I'm the only one who's been keeping everything together" because he's not saying that from some source of narcissism, he's BURDENED by this, he's TRAPPED by this, but he feels a responsibility and a duty to make up for what he did. The man is essentially using his role leading the Spider Society as a punishment for breaking canon.

"Miguel is selfish" "Miguel is evil" bro Miguel is literally just one really really bad accident away from straight up killing himself, like tearing his own hair out as he beats his head into a wall. Miguel is like when you're so extremely stressed out that when you dropped your fresh toast on the floor jelly-down you legit contemplated suicide "because why can't even one thing go right for me". This man is hanging on by a thread but like I'm convinced the third movie will have a happy ending because it just. Doesn't feel right if it doesn't? The entire first two movies were about finding your own identity and making your own expectations and I feel like the whole canon event narrative inherently challenges what the movies stand for, so, really interested in seeing how the third movie goes, waiting will fucking kill me, and also with all the articles coming out about ATSV having insane crunch, I have a good feeling Beyond The Spiderverse is gonna be delayed. I kinda like that though because like, idk, do you guys ever get sad when a show or series ends. It's like the journey is over and then you move on and kind of forget about everything. I'm enjoying these movies and these characters and I don't mind marinating with em a little while longer

[freshfromhell]

can't believe i discarded this scene a million yrs ago......... 😔

“Look at you, neck deep in pussy.”

Billy Hargrove looked down at the collapsed form before him. Slanted sunglasses, and flushed cheeks, and smeared makeup, and a snoring mouth, jaw all askew. 

Mandy Mueller snorted awake, head half hanging off the old plaid couch in Laurie Binkler’s garage. A big fat cat laid across her neck like a scarf, its furry mass clearly closing off her airway if all the honk-shoo snoring and whistle-tone gurgling was anything to go by. Her head popped up, sunglasses falling off her head and onto the floor in a clatter as she jerked into consciousness. 

“Leave her alone,” a freckled girl called from the opposite end of the couch, her body dressed in the ugly green uniform of Hawkins High’s marching band. Ugh, great, Billy thought with a frown. Billy’s mortal-nemesis: Dweebs. “She said she needs to sleep off all the alcohol she drank or she’s gonna die.”

That was definitely not how that worked.

“Yeah, leave her alone,” Mandy slurred out, agreeing even though she clearly had no fucking clue what was going on around her, squinting around all bleary-eyed in her tired, drunken state. “Asshole.”

Oh, my god. 

“You’re being strangled to death, Idiot,” Billy announced in a bid to be helpful, and Mandy muttered a couple of choice words in reply that Billy was going to pretend he didn’t hear to protect his own feelings. Billy gestured to Mueller’s self-appointed representative at the end of the couch with the neck of his bottle. “Were you really gonna let this fucking thing suffocate her like this?”

The girl scratched her nose with a chipped, painted fingernail, looking at him nervously as she inched out, “Ummm, yeah… We already tried to move it, but it, uh, really likes her, y’know?”

Yeah, well, big fucking whoop. So did Billy, but he wasn’t wrapping himself around her and trying to choke her out, was he? Well, he wasn’t tonight, anyway.

“What?” Billy spat out, eyes narrowing in disbelief at the girl. He looked back down at the fluffy gray cat before him, only to find it already staring up at him with creepy green eyes. He frowned, looking away instinctively, before doing a double-take. Eugh. What the fuck? Why was this fucking thing looking at him like that?

“It is so mean,” the girl explained with severe emphasis, rubbing her head with growing concern. “Some guys cornered it up on those shelves and were messing with it, but—!” She pointed an index finger across the room to the shelves filled with large tools and lumber. “Then Mandy came in here and told them that if they didn’t fuck off that she was gonna introduce them to her new best friend over there—“ The girl’s arm swiveled to another far wall, pointing to the chainsaw mounted by the doorway, before she continued, “And they didn’t believe her, so she went over there, ripped it off the wall, started the thing, and then asked if them if they’ve ever seen Scarface.”

“It was super bad ass!” Another geek exclaimed in excitement over the rehashing of the entire event, and Billy sent a dull frown across the group where they were stationed in a quiet corner of the garage, watching and listening like a bunch of nosy creeps.

Billy shifted in thought, taking a long sip of his drink, before asking curiously, “What the fuck does any of that have to do with moving the cat?”

“Well, we think that’s why it’s so attached to her,” she answered with a shrug, and one of the pimply nerds next to her nodded emphatically. 

Was Billy drunk, or did that not answer his question? He pursed his lips in thought.  

“Wait,” he snaked out, raising a single index finger in contemplation as something just occurring to him. “Do you work at the movie theater?”

“Uuhhh,” the girl droned out uncomfortably, eyes darting around shiftily as she drew her knees in tight from her position perched at the edge of an old coffee table. “Yeah, that’s me, I guess.”

“Rape girl,” Billy clarified with a hum.

“That’s—“ She grimaced as if the name physically pained her, shaking her head as she choked out, “Uh, probably not a great thing to call someone.”

Yeah, whatever, Billy thought to himself. 

“But that’s you—?” He prompted, eyes squinting as he tried to connect the girl before him to the girl from last Saturday. All her different uniforms were fucking with his head a little. She was like a secret agent or something with all the weird get-ups. “Right?”

“Uh, yep,” she popped the ‘p’ awkwardly, hunching in on herself. “That’s me.”

“Huh…” He muttered out loud unthinkingly, before gesturing to the sleeping Mueller offhandedly, “You go to school with us?”

“Yeah,” her lips pinched as she scratched her forehead, fussing with her bangs, “I’ve, uh, gone here longer than both of you combined, I think.”

Billy had to withhold from laughing at that. Holy shit, what a loser. That must have sucked.

“And you’re…” Billy trailed off contemplatively as he looked between the once again unconscious Mandy and the ever-annoying girl before him, “Allergic to cats?”

“Uh, no,” she answered, clearly disarmed by his line of questioning, but what the fuck else was he supposed to think in this situation?

“Then why haven’t you moved the cat off her?!” Billy demanded heatedly as he waved his arms down at the lard ass of a cat.

The band geek before him tossed her hands up helplessly as she stood up and announced, “I told you, already! This thing is, like, so mean!!”

A low yowl interrupted their yelling, and both Billy and the girl paused on either side of the coffee table to glance over at the cat. It stared up at them agitatedly, shifting around in one big loaf-like shape atop Mueller to face them down, its big bushy tail flicking across her face now. It must have irritated her nose, because her face scrunched up almost immediately as she awakened again, letting out an annoyed, whiney groan.

She swatted the tail away without even opening her eyes, calling, “What is your problem, Bitch? Get a grip.”

The cat let out a high-pitched mewl in reply, standing to balance atop Queenie as she writhed around on the couch to get comfortable.

“See?” The girl insisted with a vague gesture to the huge cat where it circled around Mandy’s torso, before seating itself very leisurely atop her chest. Queenie let out a pathetic, wheezing breath under its weight like she was a broken squeak toy. “It really likes her! They’re friends!”

“It’s gonna kill her!” Billy argued as he watched the cat begin kneading her flesh, its nails pricking through her off-the-shoulder sweater and pulling loose the threads as it purred loudly, absolutely delighted to be crushing Mueller under its impressive mass. 

“Well—!” Her words choked off abruptly as she floundered, her arms flailing everywhere in her desperation to convey something. “You move it then! See what happens!”

“Fine! I will!” Billy exclaimed, before looking to the cat in question and hesitating. Were they sure it was a cat? It was so big and ugly, it kinda looked like it wandered in from outside. Whatever. He slammed his bottle down onto the table, before pushing up the sleeves of his jacket and moving towards the couch.

It yowled at him again, this time louder and longer and even more unsettlingly. He ignored it, and it hissed, ears going back on its head as it rose up and swiped at him, making him jump back and nearly trip over the coffee table in the process of getting away.

“It’s not a cat—!” Billy declared vehemently, pointing at it as he rounded the table to stand beside Rape Girl again, hands settling on his hips as he glared at the beast that just attacked him, finishing, “It’s a fucking demon!”

It hissed at him and batted at the air wildly like it understood English. 

“It’s totally a cat!” The girl beside him insisted with an annoying amount of exasperation, “It’s just weirdly protective of her, that’s all.”

“Because she’s its next meal!” Billy gestured with a sweep of his arm in Mueller’s direction.

“No, it loves her! They’re best friends!” One of the other dweebs declared, holding her heart. “She’s like a Disney princess!”

Jesus! What was with this place?! Billy wanted to tear out his hair. He fucking hated it here. 

“Stop shouting! I’m up! Ugh!” Mandy complained grumpily, tucking her elbows under her to prop herself up. The cat only moved, stretching down her body and twisting itself onto its back as it meowed for her attention. It draped itself over her, claws stretching down to her hips as its tail waved in her face. She squinted, swatting at the offending appendage.

She looked at the cat, ignoring the rest of the room as she asked it irately, “You gotta fuckin’ problem with me? Quit showin’ your ass, before I kick it.”

It only mewled in reply, swiveling its head around to blink down at her languidly, and she flopped back onto the couch with an exhausted groan, an arm draping across her eyes. It hurried to her again, nuzzling its face into the crook her neck and rolling around until it was once again wrapped around her head.

“Outta my face,” she muttered, shoving it under her arm pit and tucking it down at her side. The cat went without a fight, twisting itself around onto its back as it settled over her abdomen, its body tucked against the back of the couch with its paws facing the sky. Billy scowled.

“Well, don’t you two look nice and cozy,” Billy called down at the pair, and Mandy’s eyes creaked open again.

“Oh, no,” she whined pathetically, tossing her head around on the couch. “I’m already drunk! What more do you want from me?”

Well, he had a joint in his pocket he wanted to share with her. He nabbed it from a stoner in the backyard, taking pity on her after she rushed off earlier to go barf after he and Tommy filled her full with beer. The only issue was that he was a little worried by the implication of sharing. 

Billy Hargrove was not the sharing type.

In his brief moment of hesitation, her eyes opened, gaze clearer as she looked to him very seriously.

“You actually want something, don’t you?” She groaned out, her nose scrunching up at him. “Aw, c’mon, Hargrove!”

He stuffed his hands into his pockets as he rounded the table towards her spot on the couch.Grabbing the back of one knee, he folded her leg up into her torso and sent the cat back into her face as he slipped between her knees and dropped himself onto the couch with a creak of the old springs. 

“Ow, Asshole!” She complained, kicking the leg he trapped between the couch and his back until she was swinging it into the air over his head and plopping it into his lap to join the other. “I’m a girl, not a chair! Don’t fold me up like that!”

Billy ignored her bitching for the most part, the sound of her nasally voice falling to the backdrop as he pulled the joint from the pocket of his jacket and held it aloft before her with a cool glance. “Ugh! God! What is everyone’s problem—?!”

Her voice cut off abruptly, eyes locking on his fingers. “Who’s that for?”

“You, if you want,” he offered, and her eyes shined at him curiously from over the fluffy body of the cat between them. 

“Why?” She asked, blinking at him. The cat joined her, craning its neck over to him and staring, its tail swishing leisurely over the edge of the couch. 

That was a loaded question. Billy licked his lips, putting the joint to his mouth and reaching for his lighter. 

“You in or out?” He asked, dodging her question. She glanced around the room, gaze a little dimmer than usual, before watching him light the spliff and take an inhale.

The teens around them hunkered down with clangs and gongs of their instruments, seeming to think this was a puff and pass situation, and Mandy rolled her eyes, waving a dainty had around in a silent demand. He handed it over, their fingertips ghosting across one another, before Mueller was pulling the joint to her lips and taking an experimental puff.

She winced, breathing out and coughing as she handed it over. “It’s laced.”

“What?” Billy scoffed, looking down at the lipstick-stained paper in his hand, before bringing it back to his mouth for another inhale, “How the hell do you know that?”

She waved the air, and the cat atop her let out a low, agitated meow in warning. 

“Shut up,” she said to it quietly, like she was embarrassed to be addressing a cat of all things, before she was looking to him. “You can’t tell? Ugh. It’s gross. Keep that shit away from me.”

“More for me then, I guess,” he taunted, breathing out a steady inhale over her way. The cat above her hacked, and Mandy waved the air again, looking to him with supreme irritation as she pushed herself into sitting, pulling her legs from his lap.

Scooting away, she grabbed the cat atop her, tucking it into her lap as she tried to get comfortable, leaning into the arm of the couch and patting around in search for something. Billy watched her lean over the edge of the couch, pulling up her jacket and then her sunglasses, before she was rooting around through her pockets. 

Ugh, god. He could watch her do literally anything and be satisfied. Him and the fat cat in her lap had that in common, apparently. The animal just ducked its head beneath her boobs, looking up through the cage of her arms as she pulled out money and lighters and playing cards from her pockets before she finally pulled out a compact mirror and busied herself with her reflection. 

“Why do I look like I’m melting?” She muttered, and the cat replied with a mewl, which made her startle, nearly dropping her mirror, before she was looking down at the thing with a finger to her lips. “Shhh. Don’t answer that.”

“You can’t really think that thing understands you,” Billy muttered to her, eyes dragging from the cat to her. He could not believe she was entertaining this monster’s bullshit.

Mandy didn’t answer him immediately, busy wiping her face clear of smeared makeup. Billy couldn’t keep his eyes from her mouth as he watched her wipe at the edge of her lips, cleaning her face of the streaks of dark red lipstick. 

“Who cares? I understand him,” she said once she was done, shooting him a curled look of judgement as he blinked away the image of her open mouth, tongue curling into the edge of her lips. “And who even asked you, huh?” 

He shook his head, taking another inhale and letting his head rock back as he closed his eyes and listened to the sounds around the room. Muffled conversation, and the static-y sound of stations changing on the small TV setup across the garage, and the distant thump of music in the house, and Mandy Mueller’s usually caustic voice sounding so soft and sweet and dreamy, asking, “Do you want a kiss?”

The words had his heart jumpstarting in his chest, pictures flying behind the dark shade of his eyelids of all the scenarios he could imagine her sounding sweet just like that, and he took another inhale to calm himself, forcing himself not to launch into action at her words. He held it until his lungs burned, before exhaling and forcing his breath not to tremble as he peeked an eye open in her direction, only to spy her looking down at the cat in her lap. 

He knew it. That fucking bitch. Offering a kiss to that smelly little gremlin when he was literally right here. 

“You look like you do,” she said, voice light and lilting as she cocked her head down at the animal in her lap. It did the same, eyes curious and pupils big and dark as it pushed its nose towards hers, craning its neck up, before reaching up towards her with a cautious paw, gently batting at her cheek, letting out a squeaky mewl in reply.

“Aw, you do, don’t you?” She cooed as it purred at her, settling its paw against her cheek, before its claws kneaded slowly into the flesh of her face, snagging the topmost layer of skin there is it pulled away. The gentle look on her features warped into something cold within a blink, and she grabbed the cat’s face in her palm, manicured fingers stretching over its skull and squeezing cruelly. “I’ll make you regret that.”

She bodied the thing in a flash, slamming it back down into her lap and looking at it forbiddingly through the cage of her fingers as she hissed, “Do. Not. Scratch. My. Face.”

When she released it, it twisted around on its belly, slinking off her lap with its hair on all end, before it was scrambling under the couch by her feet, and Billy sighed, suddenly sympathetic to the creature. He knew how it felt.

“That is so evil!” The girl from earlier called, obviously watching them the whole time.

“It scratched me!” She explained in her own defense, tossing her hands out, “I was defending myself!”

“It’s a cat,” the girl called back smartly, crossing her arms. “It has claws. It scratches.”

Mandy scoffed in return.

“Yeah, and I’m an evil bitch,” she said back in the same snotty tone, before she was sticking out her tongue. “I have those, too. You wanna see what I do with mine?”

The girl deflated at that, looking defeated as she turned back to her friend group, and Mandy scoffed to herself, slamming her compact shut and slumping into the back of the couch with a harumph.

Billy watched her with a sideways smile. God, she was completely out of her fucking mind.  

She packed herself up huffily, hands scrubbing through her hair and arms wriggling into her jacket as she stood and spun on a heel to leave. As she rounded the table and side chair, the cat darted out from under the couch and took off after her, weave through her legs and nearly tripping her. 

She shrieked, stumbling and catching herself just as she passed under the threshold, before she was looking around her confusedly. She patted her pockets, spinning around with a pinched look of confusion, a hand going to her hair, before her eyes settled on him across the room, right where she left him.

“I’m forgetting something important,” she said to herself, before a lightbulb went on in her head and she perked up. She pointed to him, droning out with girly exasperation as she weaved back around the clutter in the garage, “Ugh! Hargrooooove!”

She flapped her hand around with a jangle of bracelets as she neared him, stretching across the arm of the couch to pinch the leather shoulder of his jacket and tug him towards her. 

“C’mon! I’m not leaving you with these losers!”

He took a couple last puffs of the joint, holding the smoke as he tossed the roach in the stained glass ashtray on the table. 

“I’m coming, I’m coming,” he breathed out as she plucked at the sleeve on his arm impatiently. As if he had any hope of denying her.

[eemcintyre]

"Seawolf: The Pirate's Curse" (2005) review

Surprisingly, honestly... why did I enjoy this? I guess after a couple of major misses for me in the form of "The Kidnapping" and "Beyond Forgiveness", my expectations were appropriately low, but this one actually had some likable characters and humor, and that always manages to rope me in. I have a soft spot for fun, silly action fare like this bc of childhood shows like "The Greatest American Hero", I think.

So, the title never makes any sense... what was it supposed to mean? what curse?

First and foremost, I must say TIG is looking oh-so-very pretty and rugged here- the necklaces, the bandanas, the curly-q hair, the tank tops, the sweaty, the ARMMMSSSS 😩

Initially had absolutely no clue what was going on in the beginning; a bunch of people with weird ass outfits in the dark and I was just like please no don't let that be him in the damn fucking cape and eyepatch and o n e l e g; I was like he can't possibly have one leg the whole time, right?? 🤨

But yeah I was definitely experiencing the "dear God what did I get myself into, cheers to another awful mess" 🫡🥂

Why does half the audio sound dubbed (particularly everything that comes out of Rachel's mouth)? Also props to Rachel for being the most emotionally unaffected person ever bc her reactions were so disproportionately calm to what would happen if my bf was constantly disappearing overseas and totaled my gorgeous pink car

We're getting some very Max Parrish-type hooting and hollering up in here; a concise summary of Thorpe is that he's basically if Max had a boat and was an alcoholic instead of a drug addict

We get another hallmark of TIG's movies with a slew of incredibly cringe one-liners that elicit a physical reaction of pain from me, but for every few there was actually a genuinely funny one here and there, so I'll allow it this time...

The whole "I'm a pirate, my father was a pirate, etc." speech had me ROLLING and NOT IN THE WAY THE WRITERS INTENDED I THINK BC HUH??

When he met Helene in that random room full of paintings I was sure we were supposed to take it that the mission was smth art theft-related. but no she just has a passion for maximalist design ig.

Why does the camera get randomly shaky for no reason? Very avant-garde of them

Am I the only one who thinks that Carlos looks like a Walmart George Clooney? Someone else pls tell me I'm not insane

Always throws me off-guard but it's such fun to see TIG in an uncharacteristically light scene like the one where he's dancing in the parade and surrounded by the circle of dancers in the bar. At least he seemed like he was having a good time in this movie 🎉

Ramon and his lil book and the bar scene of Thorpe and Helene drunkenly arguing w each other and sitting on the side of the road was what really started to sell me

anD THEN HE FKIN DR A G S HER ASS 😂

Plus I cannot go without mentioning my appreciation for the way he was holding her knee 👀💕

Love how he spends the majority of this movie just dressed like someone's hot dad who works out, in his cargo shorts, tank top and goatee- oH WAIT IT'S BC HE IS A HOT DAD WHO WORKS OUT IN REAL LIFE

Love how Carlos and all the other villains are devoid of personality or motive except for ~money~, like "the Colonel" doesn't even have a name!!!

Was genuinely stressed that my boy was going to clock himself in the head when he was swinging that rope trying to scale that building

When Helene straight-up PUNCHED HER SISTER IN THE FACE like these ladies have some beef and I need to know where it stems from

This film is another great example of TIG's grossly underutilized comedic potential- a là the map reading scene

Hilarious how Carlos just shrugs like "I don't care, whatever I guess" when who he believes to be Marlena says she wants to say a dramatic goodbye to Thorpe

Ok but how did he not die?? Thank goodness but how??

Even more hilarious how the Colonel, who has had nothing but hatred and murderous intent for Thorpe throughout, is just so touched by Thorpe's being a ✨ big softie with morals ✨ that his vengeful compulsions are soothed and he's content with taking the gold like "hey bro, we're square now <3" and just fuckin walks away

Good on them for giving the treasure back to Mexico

Was legit concerned for too long there that they weren't actually going to end up together and I was screeching

DO THEY ACTUALLY USE THE SAME SHOT OF THE BOAT AT SUNSET IN THE MIDDLE OF THE MOVIE AND AT THE END?? lmaooo

Honestly, I think they could have leaned even more into the humorous aspect and the treasure hunt part of the film; made it a bit more of a National Treasure/Indiana Jones sort of thing, and I definitely would have liked some more character development, esp. for the sidekicks and villains, but overall, I award this film an unexpected 6/10. I had a good time 🙃🩷