#this has been on my mind for too long. he’s either leaving with skk or nikolai or he’s not leaving at all

[moonstoneistired]

Wouldn’t it be sooo funny if Chuuya and Dazai spent too long youtube reacting to Fyodor’s resurrection that the meursault guards found Sigma and locked him up in one of the balls cause That Man Is A Wanted Terrorist

[osamuhater]

My name is Nakahara Chuuya, Port Mafia's Executive. I joined because my subordinates and even my boss is using it and has been recommending this to me. Certainly held high expectations that I can unwind here.

If you don't have the name of Osamu Dazai, then you're free to leave.

{INFOS} Mod here!! Mod will be going as either She/her or He/him, feel free to use whichever! Chuuya will be going as he/him. I ship skk if you can't tell already! :3 If you like any other ships, that's fine too! It's your opinion! (Please keep it legal). Feel free to interact with this RP blog account, it's actually very much welcomed. Please keep things SFW. There are minors in here. I don't mind suggestiveness as long as it doesn't go full on NSWF. I will do my best to answer in character!

If there are anymore additional informations, it will be added.. (Dividers are made by: @lavendergalactic)

[arahabakis-vessel]

@juicingbeetles sorry for the tag but it got too long for a comment, so I'll also be putting this under a read-more but via the DSM-5 (I know its not the end all be all- but stick with me here) there is four main criteria to qualify for an ASPD diagnosis.

The first criteria (A) is the most complex so put a pin in that for later, because I want to come back to it after the others. 📌

But criteria B is the person is at least 18 years old and also one of the easiest to check off. He's 22 in the main manga, nothing interesting there. This is just common for personality disorders in general.

Criteria C is that there is evidence of a conduct disorder by age 15 (usually via diagnosis, however it doesn't have to be). Now this one is the most debatable as we don't actually see Dazai prior to 15. (There's one scene of him at 14~ but it doesn't tell us much other than he was under Mori's control by that point). However the criteria for conduct disorder (and i'm copy and pasting here) is "A repetitive and persistent pattern of behavior in which the basic rights of others or major age-appropriate societal norms or rules are violated, as manifested by the presence of three (or more) of the following 15 criteria in the past 12 months from any of the categories below, with at least one criterion present in the past 6 months". Now out of the following criteria, we see the following present in Fifteen:

Used a weapon to cause serious harm to someone

Been physically cruel to people

Breaking into [a] building

Lying in order to obtain favors or goods (conning others)

And that's just what we see directly in Fifteen, we know Dazai's list of antisocial behaviors balloons after he joins the mafia (Intimidation, forgery, and extortion are confirmed, which fall under other conduct disorder criterion).

Criteria D is just that the antisocial behaviors present in criteria A and C aren't due to schizophrenia or bipolar disorder (or other altered states of mind) but a part of their normal behavior. Based on the fact this behavior is very consistent and seems to be entirely continuous across his teen and years, I'm going to say it's probably not from another disorder (or substance) causing an altered state.

📌Now back to that pin we put in for Criteria A. Criteria A is a "pervasive pattern of disregard for and violation of the rights of others occurring since age 15 years, as indicated by three (or more) of the following" which is why I wanted to cover Criteria C first. However these seven criteria (and my views on how/if they apply to Dazai) are:

Failure to conform to social norms with respect to lawful behaviors as indicated by repeatedly performing acts that are grounds for arrest

Ok so obviously. He is in the mafia. He has been a part of an organized crime group (officially) since he was 15. We've seen part of his list of crimes in the manga, and he canonically gets sent to prison. I don't think I need to expand too much on this one, it's also covered in criteria C.

Deceitfulness, as indicated by repeated lying, use of aliases, or conning others for personal profit or pleasure

Connected to previous answer as well as criteria C, we know Dazai's crimes and also... Mafia, but also expanding on it, it's something we do see in Fifteen and continued into Stormbringer, Dead Apple, Dark Era, and finally into Entrance Exam and the main manga. From Fifteen, he manipulates the Sheep into thinking Chuuya betrayed them, so that they would actually betray Chuuya, so he could get Chuuya to join the Port Mafia. In Stormbringer he repeatedly lies to Verlaine to manipulate him into changing his plan so that Mori doesn't get killed (but also to put them in the most advantageous position to defeat Verlaine, even if that means killing all of Chuuya's friends and also letting Chuuya get tortured). (Blame Asagiri for the fact most of the light novels about pre-18 Dazai have to do with SKK). But this trait of his doesn't stop once he leaves the mafia either, we repeatedly see him lying to others to make his plans work throughout the main manga as well. While not an outright lie and more a... obfuscation of the truth, let's not forget Dazai didn't reveal he was part of the mafia until well into two years at the ADA, and not sharing any of the information he knew about the actual members even if it would have helped the ADA. ("We know nothing about [Akutagawa]" my ass Dazai.)

Impulsivity or failure to plan ahead

Imo this one is mostly inapplicable. Dazai is always shown to be constantly thinking ahead. His suicidal nature is somewhat impulsive and also not very well planned out (as seen in the first few episodes, as well as in Fifteen), and he does seem to overlook things that should be probably obvious (I don't believe Dazai planned to get shot in that alley with Fyodor, I'm sorry but I can't believe it) but neither of these things happen to the point of disordered behavior (outside of being suicidal in the first place). I am saying this as someone who does deal with disordered impulsivity + failure to plan ahead due to unrelated disorders, but others may have opinions otherwise.

Irritability and aggressiveness, as indicated by repeated physical fights or assaults

Also not incredibly applicable, at least by the time we see him during the ADA, but definitely much more present during his time in the mafia. He's killed people for very minor things, and also tried to shoot Akutagawa (something that would kill anyone that didn't have an ability that could stop bullets) because he failed to be good enough, among his other physical abuse of him. Dazai notably is in quite a lot of fights alongside Chuuya, but as they were more work related than not I wouldn't necessarily count them, but rather have that fall under the "failure to conform to social norms".

Reckless disregard for safety of self or others

Constantly trying to kill himself. Do I need to say more /j. But also his substance abuse (before and after reaching the age of majority, which is 20 in Japan), treating others (especially their lives) as pawns, especially Akutagawa and other unnamed lower ranking members/mafia grunts.

Consistent irresponsibility, as indicated by repeated failure to sustain consistent work behavior or honor financial obligations

He is known as a slacker and doesn't seem to show up to work on time, but it seems like this is an intentional choice on Dazai's part rather than unintentional/disordered behavior, again coming from someone who does experience this to a disordered degree from unrelated disorders. And finally:

lack of remorse, as indicated by being indifferent to or rationalizing having hurt, mistreated, or stolen from another.

This is one of the biggest to me. In all the media, I can count the number of times Dazai feels any sort guilt or remorse towards his actions on one hand essentially and it's only ever been towards two people, Chuuya and Oda (and Chuuya's on very thin ice there). He is never shown to feel anything other than indifference towards his actions towards Akutagawa, even further antagonizing him against Atsushi. To further this, I was actually talking with a friend a long time ago, and they reminded me of this scene from Dazai's entrance exam:

(Image Description in Alt ID)

Dazai is very clearly doesn't feel any remorse for using Rokuzo to kill Sasaki, although he's still rationalizing it for Kunikida's sake, to try and make him see Dazai's side of things, that it's clearly fine to do.

Now out of those seven, he doesn't really fit three of them, leaving four of the seven sub-criteria that he does fit, meaning he does meet the three of seven requirement to meet Criteria A. Therefore, he meets all the criteria required for ASPD according to the DSM-5. Obviously the DSM isn't the end all be all of the antisocial experience, but from being friends with people who are antisocial, as well as reading accounts from others I don't know, Dazai does share many similarities and experiences of those real life people as well.

I feel like I should say, even if it feels obvious, I don't think Dazai was intentionally written with an ASPD diagnosis in mind. Asagiri very clearly based him off of a specific archetype of a genius (think BBC Sherlock, as much as I dislike that portrayal of Sherlock, it's a very clear example of the archetype) which also just happens to be one that fits the criteria of ASPD very well. Similar to the way Ranpo was written with another genius archetype in mind, but one that is very clearly based in Autism instead.

But I also think that this being unintentional has made Dazai better unintentional representation. Dazai does seem to have anhedonia caused by depression, and possibly alexythemia or blunted emotions as well, but he still experiences a full range of feelings (vs. the stereotype that 'sociopaths are all unfeeling monsters'). He has people he cares for, and when Oda dies he genuinely grieves his death. And I think most importantly he is trying to be a better person in the series and improve from his past behavior. Not because he seems to feel any remorse for it, as shown above, but because it was what Oda wanted for him, and was literally his dying wish. I don't think that effort is any less valid just because it comes from an external motivation rather than an internal one. In the main manga we see him using a lot of the same skills that he used in the mafia, but this time he's using them for "the good guys" like Oda wanted, even if Dazai's still willing to do 'bad' things if it gets him the right result.

thinks about how we see Dazai hit the required criteria for ASPD across all the BSD media... but also how so many people blow entirely past the actual evidence and go !!! SOCIOPATH!!! MANIPULATIVE PSYCHOPATH!!!! Not seeing the "he was clearly traumatized in a way that severely affected him to the point it entirely dictates how he interacts with the world now" part of it.

[ryuuaka713]

Bungou Stray Dogs Dead Apple: “You used corruption, believing in me? How Beautiful.” A “DISSECTION” OF THE SCENE

I mentioned before in one of the posts by @nataliaphantomhivesblog​, where we were discussing about the corruption scenes in BSD, that the scene in Dead Apple is my favorite. So, I decided (like any SKK trash) to make an “analysis” of that scene, just to make a point why I like it the most compared to the other corruption scenes (as if this post is the definition of being productive like I’ll just wasting my time rambling here LOL)

I divided this post into two parts. Part 1 is the more difficult one where I am attempting to write some “character analysis”. While Part 2 is more about how the scene is composed (it’s pretty boring. I’m sorry)

I will NOT include the infamous Lap scene (I know. I know. We all love that moment. But I would rather focus on the scenes before that).

Side note: I do not specialize in film or literary critique, so really this whole post is just for fun. Thus, why I put quotes on the analysis. Take this is as my personal opinion where I’m attempting to make sense by making it sound “fancy”.

But anyway. Here it goes:

In every Corruption scene, the thematic notion is always Trust—as in Chuuya trusts Dazai well enough to use his ability so long as he is present to nullify it. It is a very life-threatening process, especially for Chuuya since Corruption, despite being one of the most powerful abilities, can cause self-destruction the longer he uses it. So, Dazai should keep a close watch on him at all times, and then even giving him a sense of comfort to compensate to Chuuya’s worn-out body and for his efforts. This is the same trajectory in all 5 episodes of Corruption, but out of all of them, what stood out the most (for me) is the scene from Dead Apple. 

This scene has amazed me ever since I first watched the movie. And while it just shows their infinite trust, the whole execution of this scene evokes more than just that thematic concept. What I see in this scene is something that all of us have already witnessed, but there is something unique in the way Dazai nullifies Chuuya’s corruption, and their dialogue may be just them bantering and yet, their tonality is different. It is as if, we just touched a moment that is reserved only for these two and we just happened to have the privilege to witness it. In other words, there is a sort of familiarity (or intimacy) and gentleness going on at this very moment—it is cathartic. This is what I want to look into—like how did we come to this?

PART 1: His Proper Partner.

In the Japanese version, ever since the episode where Chuuya made his first debut, they call themselves “aibou” (相棒), referring to a one-on-one partnership. While “nakama” (仲間)can also refer to a partner, it has a different connotation in which the closest English equivalent of that term would be “comrade” or “acquaintance”. The closest English equivalent of “aibou” is, to no one’s surprise, “partner” (or “pal”). And it makes sense, considering that the first kanji (相) can mean “mutual”, “together”, or “each other”. So, to have Dazai and Chuuya referring to themselves as that, it just manifests their familiarity on each other.

And in their case, their “familiarity” is both their advantage and disadvantage. It is a “disadvantage” because they use it to get on each other’s nerves (both in comedic and serious situations).

However, it also serves to their advantage, especially when they have to cooperate in the battlefield. This comes into light in the Lovecraft Episode where they executed Operation Shame and Toad—Chuuya acknowledges Dazai’s tactical mentality, whereas Dazai (as he referenced Chuuya’s mastery in martial arts) let’s his partner do the grunt work. Interesting enough, this is the same episode we first see Chuuya’s Corruption (but not the first time he uses it).

Using Corruption stipulates that “familiarity”, especially in Dazai’s part who has to be present to monitor Chuuya’s physical state, therefore he is aware, not just the consequence in using Corruption, but also of Chuuya’s limit. This explains why Dazai declares that he is aware of Chuuya’s moves and “breathing pattern”, otherwise, as what he himself says, he “won’t be a proper partner”.

What is witnessed in the Lovecraft Episode is the standard protocol that Soukoku uses when they are at their last resort. So, it is not a surprise that we get to witness Chuuya using Corruption, again, when he saves Dazai in Dead Apple, except it is done differently.

Even though Dazai is ten steps ahead of the enemy, the situation is still risky and even more complicated in Chuuya’s part since he is using his ability WITHOUT Dazai present. And that he has to save Dazai first before he can get it nullified. With that being said, it requires a careful approach, one in which they know the other’s moves—Dazai knows too well how Chuuya would react. For instance, the manga version of Dead Apple demonstrates how Soukoku communicates in their operation using “codes”. As such when Dazai got himself kidnapped, no one knew about his whereabouts until Hirotsu mentions about Dazai buying a microscope (to which it leads them to a dead end). However, Chuuya—upon remembering that Dazai teases that he needs a microscope in order to see him—demands to see that microscope, breaks it, and finds the transmitter. It is a well-planned strategy in Dazai’s part where all it takes is to leave helpful clues for Chuuya to pick up and catalyze the operation. In the Dead Apple movie, he does it again:

Indeed, for the audience, it is not new to see Dazai planning ahead and having ulterior motives behind his actions. It is not new to see Chuuya executing his plans and understands his motives either. But seeing these two working together despite those four years of absence, and without physically communicating is beyond human comprehension. Almost like the microscope scene, Dazai is not there to directly tell him about his plan. Chuuya doesn’t know about the antidote until that punch as his only “clue” is that Dazai is working alone, so he sees that something is amiss.

Seeing the critical state of Yokohama, Chuuya knows that he will use Corruption, but seeing Dazai’s corpse, it gives this uncertainty on whether they can make it out alive or not. And yet, what did Chuuya do? He jumped off the plane and activates his ability, knowing that there is “no time to chicken out” or else Dazai’s plan won’t work, and they’ll end up dead. Even if it means doing the job to protect the city, it still takes guts for Chuuya to work and place his life on someone he “hates”. Despite those 4 years of absence, the scene in Dead Apple just manifests that they never doubt each other’s capabilities. And to further validate this, let’s check out their dialogue:

           Dazai: You used Corruption, believing in me? How beautiful.

           Chuuya: Yeah I did. I believe in your disgusting vitality and craftiness.

           Dazai: That was a somewhat violent way to wake up Snow White.

           Chuuya: Tch. You’re the one who hid an antidote your mouth knowing I would punch you.          

Not only does this scene perfectly parallels to the Lovecraft episode where we see Soukoku bantering while still in a critical situation, it also emphasizes the degree of their trust and how that trust has taken root from their familiarity.

Dazai: You used Corruption, believing in me? How beautiful.

Chuuya: Yeah I did. I believe in your disgusting vitality and craftiness.

Dazai’s first line is the main idea of their partnership, echoing Chuuya’s quote from the Lovecraft episode: “I used Corruption because I trust you”. This is a vital aspect in their relationship since it has been stated before in Fifteen and Stormbringer that “no one has trusted Dazai”… until Chuuya comes into the picture. Ever since their first teamwork against Rimbaud, Dazai finally has someone he can rely on both in strength and assurance, even smiling at the fact that Chuuya doesn’t even deny his proposal but merely asks for his reason.

With that being said, then it is appropriate for Dazai to say that line, touched by the idea that Chuuya still constantly trusts him. It just reminisced so much from what they have as children that it seems to this day, they never forgotten about it.

On the other hand, in Chuuya’s end, he confirms that trust and provides a reason, which is appropriate since Chuuya is Dazai’s “reason-living” like in Fifteen:

Chuuya’s line—“I believe in your disgusting vitality and craftiness”—is very similar in the excerpt from Fifteen, and this just shows how that line from the movie indicates his familiarity to Dazai. By “familiarity”, I mean that he knows his partner’s mental process and motives (as I have mentioned above). In this case, it seems like Chuuya has seen something that he and Dazai have in common: the desire to live. Of course, the latter always craves for death, but with his new viewpoint on Death, his mission in fulfilling Oda’s wish, and the fact that he is tethered to someone who wished to live, Dazai just couldn’t die. And Chuuya, being his constant companion, knows this. This is why Chuuya “believes” that whatever plan Dazai has on mind, it will always work, and in the scenario in Dead Apple it starts by taking a leap into Corruption—which is ironically, the very thing that could kill Chuuya, and by extent, would cause Dazai’s death if the plan is not well-thought or if they don’t work together. By referring to his “vitality and craftiness”, Chuuya is acknowledging his familiarity on Dazai, admitting their “rotten relationship”, and justifying his trust on him.

Dazai: That was a somewhat violent way to wake up Snow White.

Chuuya: Tch. You’re the one who hid an antidote your mouth knowing I would punch you.

Another interesting thing I find in the dialogue is Dazai’s line: “That was a somewhat violent way to wake up Snow White”. Fans think that this is Dazai flirting, where he is implying that he wants to be kissed by Chuuya the same way the prince does to Snow White. For me, I think this little dialogue is more than just fanservice since it makes sense, not only in the context of the movie containing motifs of a “poisoned” apple. I think the reference of the fairytale in this dialogue not only foreshadows his “death”, but it also highlights their dynamic whenever they work together with Dazai acting childish and Chuuya knowing that he is actually being serious (or the fact that he cracks some jokes in most Post-Corruption scenes). This is still related to the whole “familiarity” theme that I have been rambling about; as mentioned before, Dazai and Chuuya would use whatever they know about each other just to rile each other up. These moments are generally meant for comedic effect, but these teasing and bickering can serve as their advantage.

Similar to the microscope scene I have mentioned, Dazai makes that microscope comment seem like a childish joke on the surface, however, Chuuya picks this up as a clue and sees his real motive. This kind of synergy is seen again in the prologue of the movie where Dazai jokes about Chuuya getting hit by bullets when he is in close range of the enemy, and yet, the latter takes it as a warning that an ability-user is nearby. We really don’t know if Dazai leaves a Snow White-related clue for Chuuya before the events in Dead Apple (it would have been pretty cool tho), but that dynamic in the microscope incident and prologue is very similar to that dialogue we see in the movie: Dazai is being playful, but Chuuya sees and calls out his ulterior motives. This is how Soukoku works!

PART 2: The Art of Catharsis

The relationship of Soukoku in the battlefield is one of the best teamwork we have seen in the anime. Both parties are synchronized in the way that Dazai’s brains and No Longer Human, and Chuuya’s fighting skills and Corruption perfectly compliment each other. Moreover, we also see the basis of that partnership, and this is something that the creators want to highlight in this scene (in other words, how did the animators deliver this dynamic?)

In my opinion, I think the words “gentleness” and “cathartic” fit in this scene. To start off, before this moment takes place, we have witnessed Chuuya fighting the Dragon.

That scene was intense! Chuuya activates Corruption, generates into pure destruction with him yelling Dazai’s name (despite the fact that he is not supposed to be in a proper mindset). The way this scene plays out is interesting; in the shot, we see the two main figures (the Dragon and Chuuya) mostly in red—which is a very vibrant color—in contrast to the blue and green background. By using the color that pops out, the attention is on them, and it is topped with the amount of action in that moment. Not to mention, the background music, containing a rock music and a rap, elevates that energy. It is a scene that heightens the adrenaline, so the audience can empathize with Chuuya—understanding him as a character that is full of life, and also his hastiness to kill it before he runs out of time.

When that fight is over, we notice that the music alters into a string orchestra. This is a very good change because the tempo is slower—a direct contrast to the rap music—as if it is slowly bringing the audience down from the hype in the fighting scene the same way Chuuya slowly goes down and hovers Dazai’s body. The music immediately stops right on cue when the punch happens, then the audience is left in silence. Usually in films, silence is used for the purpose of anticipation. In this case, the anticipation is placed on whether Chuuya’s punch and/or the pill worked and saved Dazai.

The transition from the white background into a blue background should indicate that Dazai is alive. And yet, the animators did this subtly rather than showing Dazai’s face (like in Season 1 episode 1), just so the audience is still in the state of anticipation (add that with the white noise in the background). Furthermore, there is a fairytale quality in that shot, like this is similar to when Sleeping Beauty (in this case “Snow White”) wakes up, that’s when the colors in the castle come back.

Getting close to that iconic shot, I love how the animators keep the “camera” in the same place (Chuuya’s face), that way we can further empathize with Chuuya by seeing a close shot of his state: he was at his limit! But as soon as the blood starts moving away from the screen, we can see a bandaged hand moving to his face. And then, finally!

Words cannot describe how much I appreciate the details of that scene, especially on Dazai’s gesture. He moves his hand slowly but quick enough to nullify him right on time. Not to mention, he does not just touch his cheek but rather cups it (look at the shape of his hand!). One can say that the gentleness in Dazai’s gesture is the exact opposite to Chuuya’s punch, and this sort of contrast further highlights the catharsis in this scene. In other words, after all of that intensity with the fight and seeing Chuuya’s bloody state, it is relieving to see that familiar hand touching him, indicating that Chuuya can rest. And seeing that we witnessed and empathize with him, we know what it feels like.

With that being said, that’s why the third shot above where the hand is fully placed on his cheek and he made a short gasp is my personal favorite. It is the contrast in Chuuya’s face where we can still see “Corruption”, and Dazai’s hand to which he activates “No Longer Human”. I have seen some people complaining about how they want to see Dazai’s face in this scene; personally, I think this scene is animated brilliantly as it is. It is only fair to see a close up of Dazai’s hand to indicate that he is nullifying “Corruption”, after all, “No Longer Human” is works through touch. To top it off, the beauty in “not seeing the face” is more powerful because it leaves more to the imagination—we don’t know specifically what kind of face Dazai is making, but the way that hand moves alone is enough to tell us what he is thinking at that moment. And finally, upon contact, we see Chuuya making a slight twitch—this is when Corruption recognizes No Longer Human and deactivates. This is when Chuuya recognizes that familiar touch and knows that his partner is finally awake, so he can finally rest.

Then we have that iconic shot! Like the one I mentioned above, the camera stays in one place, only this time, it is a long shot, so the focus is on them (thus they are on the middle). Interesting enough, there is no background music in this scene, and we can’t see their expressions. Usually, in this anime, when a character is seen faceless, in order to determine what they are thinking are feeling, the animators would usually make them do a gesture or a dialogue.

In this scene, where everything is silent and their faces “unseen”, our focus goes to their exchanges. Both Mamoru and Taniyama use their “bedroom voices”, and I think it is appropriate considering that their dialogue contains a deeper meaning in regards of their relationship. In other words, as mentioned before, it may seem like another day of bantering, but with their tone, there is something sincere and intimate in what they are saying. Also, the playfulness in Dazai’s comment and Chuuya’s response hits different compared to their other moments of constant yelling. You really don’t need the close up of their faces in order to see that they are at peace in each other’s company.

In addition, the color scheme of the scene is predominantly blue, which makes sense, not just because of Dazai’s ability, but also because it highlights the serenity in the scene. The blue color, the orb, and the bandages that glide silently are animated in a way that they buffer out the red that we have seen back with Corruption, and also indicates a sense of “protection” (which is later seen in the lap scene when Dazai has to protect Chuuya from the fog). In short, the ambiance perfectly fits with how Dazai is there to give Chuuya a sense of comfort in Post-Corruption, letting him rest so that he can compensate for all that he did.

**********

The scene in Dead Apple is something that lies in between of the familiar and the new—we have seen Dazai and Chuuya in this situation before, we know how they function as a team, and we know the level of risk they are taking. But this is something that we have never seen before; like subtleness in his gestures, the softness in their tones, and the fact that these two are in a position where they are saving each other, which becomes part of their instincts. They show how much they trust each other by knowing how much they knew of each other. They acknowledge the fact that their fates are tethered regardless of the years of absence. And finally, it is not just the Prince saving Snow White, but rather: the Prince saves Snow White and Snow White saving him in return.

OK, I just literally fried my brain. If you’ve read this far, I thank you so much for your time! I am so sorry if this is too long. I welcome for any critiques or discussions. So yeah, that’s my ted-talk

[marahuyos]

anon asked: Hi I really liked that hc with the pointing lips, I didn’t expect to see this on the tag list and my filipino heart couldn’t contain it 🥺 this is my first time requesting for a genshin fanfic heheh. I want to request a hc something to do with Harana, where the characters (albedo, Diluc, kaeya, maybe xiao 👀 and other characters you would like to add) sing from your window to persuade/court you since it’s part of (our) S/O culture so they wanted to impress them with this... IKSNSJS

*:･ﾟ✧ nakilig ako dito putaena AHAHAHAHHA

doing this quickly bc i wanna do it b4 windblume ends sksks. also i’ll go and link some songs fitting for the characters (all filipino ofc. spoilers its all ben&ben HAHAHAHAHA)!

gn!reader

tw: none

✧ Diluc Ragnvindr | Ben&Ben - Araw-Araw

Umaga na sa ating duyan 'Wag nang mawawala Umaga na sa ating duyan Magmamahal, o mahiwaga

• It’s apparent that Diluc can sing since he won first place in the music minigame. He was taught at a young age on playing and dabbling in the arts like any other young noble should. It comes as no surprise that Diluc knows how to sing and play.

• It was you who had to tell Diluc this tradition when the Windblume Festival hits. When hearing the prospect of reciting poetry to your loved ones, you immediately got excited, which made Diluc question your sudden excitement.

• “Back where I’m from, there’s a tradition where a person will sing to their crush if they want to court them. It’s usually underneath a window sill but either way, I do want to experience it at least once!”

• He imprints the sight of your soft smile at the memory of the tradition. He thinks back on his time learning music as he cleans a beer glass. He’s not a bad singer by any means (ngl i thought diluc was voiced by jonah scott bc hoo boy he sings. but imagine my surprise when he was voiced by mishima skks). He can definitely carry a tune but would he risk his entire dignity by singing under your window sill with a song that he barely knows?

• If Kaeya wasn’t there, then maybe. Maybe.

• So he opts for the next best option; serenading in a private and romantic place. It wouldn’t be the Dawn Winery, there is too much traffic to try and attempt to sing. Windrise is an option but Diluc knows that the sisters of the church comes and cleans the statue (and Barbatos knows that he doesn’t want Barbara to faint from his voice). His next bet is Starsnatch Cliff, where numerous Cecilia flowers are littered across the cliff. 

• With that plan, he now attempts to memorize a song from your country. Diluc’s a fast learner, so he has no trouble learning the notes, the lyrics (though his pronunciation leaves little to be desired), and finally, the emotion carried through the music. Now that’s where he struggled since he doesn’t know how to convey emotion compared to other musicians. He tries his best, even asking Venti for help (enrolled is what Venti would use but at least he was paid with the best alcohol).

• Now to actually play the damn thing. He already struggled when inviting you out to Starnsatch Cliff (and bribing the couple that was there away), he hopes that his fingers wouldn’t twitch from nerves. It was when he began strumming his guitar that he realized something: there was no point in proving that he can sing. There was no point in learning a different language when there were many other different things he could’ve done to impress you. There was no need to potentially embarrass himself.

• But it was worth it when he sees your wide-eyes, your parted lips, and the warmth on your cheeks when he leans in closer. It’s worth it to see your eyes shine just like the stars in the sky when you understood the lyrics. It was worth it to see you say the words that Diluc longed to hear from your lips as he sealed them with a kiss.

Dawn has come within our cradle I pray you never fade Dawn has come within our cradle I love you, my ethereal

✧ Albedo | Ben&Ben - Ride Home

Took a morning ride, found a place up in my mind, no one else can see Maybe it's fate that we lose control In circles around, we go We become who we ought to know We just gotta let it go We just gotta let it go

• I think it’s safe to say that everyone knows Albedo can sing when his VA posted him singing. He can carry a tune and play decently on the strings. It’s just that he closes himself off in his research in Dragonspine all the while the Windblume Festival is in full swing. It’s not like you to leave someone behind while everyone is celebrating so you stand by Albedo for the duration of the festival.

• He says that you didn’t have to keep him company, more so if you don’t know anything about alchemy, but you were adamant to not leave the alchemist alone. Albedo can’t help the warmth fluttering in his heart that you wanted to stay with him. He wanted to try and teach you basic alchemical stuff so you wouldn’t feel bored or left out but he feared the shakiness in his voice would hinder him.

• So, you two talk about each other instead. While Albedo didn’t have anything noteworthy to talk about, you said to him about how you wished you can partake in the music game in hopes to play a love song. You told him that you wanted to try and sing a love song to your crush since it was a tradition in your country. While he bristled at the fact that you have a crush, the way your eyes flitted towards him, with a wavy smile on your face solidified his feelings for you.

• Having that information in mind, he quickly makes a harp out of the materials he has on hand. Such a feat is nothing to Albedo but it wasn’t the music that he was afraid of, it was giving his feelings away to you so suddenly. Learning a new language wasn’t so hard (because he learned it when he immediately realized he had feelings for you, what’s stopping him from learning everything?), but he fears that you may take it the wrong way.

• Or rather, he fears that he may do something he regret towards you.

• But he perseveres. When you were up sitting on a rock formation, studying a rare flower, Albedo stood below you, harp in hand. The sight of him, his beautiful eyes that were used to be so sure are now nervously flitting from side to side. His voice was carried out to the wind, deep and soothing just like the winds that caressed your skin. Albedo is nothing short of nervous but he was sure that he had his point across when he sees your blushing smile.

• All fears vanished when you jumped down a giggling mess, saying that this was the best Windblume Festival ever when you leaned in and kissed him.

So I'm coming home to you, ooh You, ooh You're all I need, the very air I breathe You are home, home

✧ Kaeya Alberich | Ben&Ben - Pagtingin

‘Pag nilahad ang damdamin Sana ‘di magbago ang pagtingin Aminin ang mga lihim Sana ‘di magbago ang pagtingin

• Kaeya won’t deny that he’s just as musically inclined as Diluc. As siblings, they’re naturally competitive against one another, always competing to see who can play the better piece. He wishes he could go back to those days, but bygones are bygones. Now, he strums his harp just for fun. Still, he’s not one to serenade to random strangers so it’s a first time for him to be laying his heart out in the open.

• Kaeya, like a responsible captain, steals you away and joins in the festivities with you with an arm around your waist. Reluctantly, you humored him, as you recount previous stories that you’ve experienced. One particular story that he keeps in memory was when you were serenaded once in your own bedroom window. While you had to turn down the one courting for personal reasons, you can’t help but feel warm whenever you remember the memory. Ever since hearing the bards’ sing their songs for the festival, you can’t help the flutter in your heart.

• Now, Kaeya is a very adaptable man, so he quickly thinks the best way on how to confess to you. Sometimes he has to curse himself from being so successful at flirting at absolutely everyone that he knows you could pass it off as being Kaeya. So he figures out the next best thing.

• Now, unlike Diluc, he’s willing to throw away his dignity for you. He’s willing to throw anything away from you because you were already so etched deeply in Kaeya’s heart.

• He’s a fast learned like Albedo, so it wasn’t hard to learn your language and do the correct pronunciation. All that’s left is to sing it and where. He hopes he could sing it underneath your balcony but you lived near the Cat’s Tail Tavern, where the noise has been raucous in this time of year.

• So he decided on going to the safety of your home, “drunkenly” stating that he was too sloshed to go back to his duties so he wishes to stop by your home until he sobers up. It wasn't an uncommon sight to see, so you relented Kaeya in resting on your couch as you prepared some water for him to sober up. At that moment, he prepares his act. 

• With his guitar in hand, he stands up and meets you in the kitchen. With his fingers elegantly strumming against the strings, his silky voice permeated across the house. His one eye watched your own widen at the sight of the man singing. He relished it even more when he sees the recognition in your eyes when you know the song that he's singing. Each lyric has been beautifully sung and amazingly enunciated that you wondered if Kaeya was a native to your homeland. 

• Kaeya wasn't normally a sap like this. He doesn't just do this to anyone. He even wonders what's the point of this when he doesn't even know that you'll accept him for who he truly is-for what he will do when things go awry. He recounts the words of a bygone father and he feels every ounce of sin he’s committed claw his back.

• But your gentle touch sends them away. Your hands burn the sins to ashes as you told him your ‘I love you’ in your language. And he understood it perfectly.

If I reveal just how I feel I hope you won't change how you look at me Admit all secrets I keep I hope you won't change how you look at me

✧ Xiao | Ben&Ben - Kathang Isip

Pasensya ka na Sa mga kathang isip kong ito Wari'y dala lang ng pagmamahal sa iyo Ako'y gigising na Sa panaginip kong ito At sa wakas ay kusang lalayo sa iyo (lalayo sa)

• Could Xiao even sing? Guizhong may have instilled some Liyue music in his veins when he was still a baby adeptus, she may have pulled her hair out once or twice when Xiao keeps breaking the guzhengs. At least Xiao has a decent voice, so Guizhong wouldn’t strangle Xiao with a forced sweet smile on her face. After the archon war and the yakshas fall, Xiao never sang or picked up another instrument ever again.

• Not when he passed Mondstat, hearing the insufferable bard play his tune, hearing the people who’re safe from karmic binds profess their love for one another, it made him sick. But by Guizhong’s hair would he waste this opportunity to leave you alone in the Windblume Festival. Even if he has to drag you away from the crowd in fear of him lashing out. He is not apologetic to him dragging you away but he does wonder why you would rather choose to spend your time with him rather than enjoy the festivities.

• It was at the city walls, you and Xiao enjoying the almond tofu you prepared beforehand. You did most of the talking, talking about random things that you can get. Xiao would always dutifully listen because he-honestly-you’re the only mortal that wormed his way into his heart and now he wants more but afraid of the consequences. He listens to you rambling about a courting method where one person serenades the other while they were in a higher place, just like the city walls.

• Human courting rituals have been the most confusing thing to Xiao; why go through such great lengths just to confess to someone your feelings? Shouldn’t straight up saying it be better and save time for each party? Even when he says this, he can’t help but watch your eyes glimmer at the thought of someone serenading you, in a night just like this.

• He was willing to embarrass himself for you, as he planted his feet on the wall railings. “Wait here.”

• He jumps and before you could say anything, he uses his Anemo Vision to keep him afloat. On his position, he was below you by a few feet. You watched in confusion when he summoned a lyre (and you could make out a scowl on his face, as if he was cursing the instrument) and soon, he began strumming it.

• His harp skills... could do some work. Some tone-deaf bard might have bawled his eyes out if he hears him play, but he was willing to swallow that embarrassment when he gets to have his point across. He hopes that he does, laying his heart like this just for you to take apart, for you to heal, for you to do whatever you want with it. He was willing to be weak and revere to you as someone as grand as an archon. 

• Xiao wasn’t expecting you to understand but when he sees tears in your eyes and your hand covering your mouth, he immediately stopped his singing and hurried to your side. Though, he didn’t have to. You already jumped down and got caught in his arms. He felt your tears soak his skin, your incoherent babbles muffled by his shoulder but he could make out that Xiao’s feelings aren’t one-sided.

I'm sorry For this imagination of mine I guess it's just because of my love for you I will wake up now From this dream of mine And in the end I will stay away from you (stay away from)

[nikadoesanart]

My predictions on BSD getting animated going forward

I’ll be taking a look at the novel page counts (Japanese and English) and comparing them to the screen time they’ve gotten so far and then using this to predict how long the remaining light novel adaptations will be (approximately). At the end will also be my rough prediction/hopes for the order of some of these being adapted. I say some because I have yet to read what there is so far of the gaiden novel translations, the main story manga has essentially still been on the DOA arc almost since where the anime left off, and I personally think that it’s currently too soon for Storm Bringer (aside from money purposes).

Note, most of this was written well before the anime 5th anniversary livestream but the announcements wound up not affecting it. I then of course made adjustments as needed account for the novel content we do have so far, both in Japanese and in English (officially).

Page to Episode Count

Not counting the afterward, ads, etc for the English/US copy, Japanese is including it

Also all eng page counts are using the Yen Press release and jp page counts are taken from the fandom wiki

*148 is purely counting the Untold Origins portion of the novel. If we also count the A Day at the Agency short story that’s included before it (56 pages), then we get the full 203

Also the English page count for BEAST was noted before the English release date but after page counts have been posted by affiliated retailers, so subtract a couple pages from the written count of 176 for the time being to account for the afterward and possible character sheets being included

Now that we have our page to episode counts (as of April 5th, 2021), let’s find the actual content run time of what we do have animated so far.

Seasons 1-3 and the OVA all have the same episode length/duration. Each episode is 23 minutes, and we can subtract 3 minutes on average from that to account for the OP and ED being played. This leaves us with an average of 20 minutes of BSD story content per episode. So on average, each of the first 3 seasons contain 240 minutes, or 4 hours, worth of story content.

Dead Apple’s total run time is 91 minutes, with the OP and ED making up 9 of those minutes. However, we do have a bit of the story content being played while the ED is playing (as sometimes happens in the anime as well). To keep the math simple, I’ll be approximating story content time at 82 minutes.

Apply these numbers to the novels that have been animated so far and this is (approximately) what we get:

Now let’s use these numbers to predict the screen time needed for the other novels

Note that we can’t really use Entrance Exam as a fair measure because of how much got cut out (just compare the run time of it to Dark Era and it speaks for itself). However, the numbers for Dark Era and Dead Apple are the best ones to use, as they both have minimal changes between anime and novel and both have official English translations currently available. Take out the approximate time taken up by OP/ED and and the numbers pretty much match up.

So with that being said, we can estimate Untold Origins (only) at approximately 3 eps/60 min and 55 Minutes at 1h 40-55min/100-115 min or 5-6 eps if it doesn’t get a movie. We can also estimate the A Day at the Detective Agency short story at the beginning of Untold Origins to take up about 1 ep, probably even a bit less.

1+ 3 + 5-6 = 9-10 episodes which isn’t enough for a full single cour season unless they all get put into one big OVA season, but also 10-11 eps (or less) seasons are a thing (ie. Fugou Keiji: Balance Unlimited, Blood Lad, Black Butler: Book of Circus, The Seven Deadly Sins: Signs of a Holy War, FLCL)

My personal predictions/hopes for the anime adaptation timeline going forward

This is considering the manga content, current “pausing/stopping points” what wouldn’t be too awkward, each of the novels relevancy/necessity to the main story manga, and assuming we continue with single cour (12-13 ep) seasons

Hopefully/ideally a 55 Minutes movie

S4: ch 54-70

Early S5 (preferably) or end of S4: Untold Origins or A Day at the Agency

S5: ch 71-88/around where we are now?

A Day at the Agency can, in my opinion at least, be chucked in at any point either as a single episode OVA or as the light novel content for s4 (maybe not even taking a full episode and then starting ch 54 in the last few minutes for example). Keep in mind that the current DOA arc is a long one and has plenty to it, so personally I think it may even be better to not include a novel adaptation in a future S4, as it would likely already be a right squeeze content wise. Remember, we also have a few XX.5 chapters that are continuations of the chapter directly before them.

I still need to read what’s currently available of the gaiden novel fan translations but it can probably be adapted at any point as well. I’m estimating approximately 5-6 eps as an OVA series. I don’t really think it would get a movie, partially because you can make it only so long, especially since it’s an anime movie and unlike Storm Bringer, it doesn’t have Chuuya to practically guarantee the profit.

BEAST also doesn’t directly impact the main story and can be adapted at virtually any point. However, seeing as we do have a live action confirmed for it and it’s page count lines up very closely with Dark Era, it can be either 4 eps or (more likely in my opinion) a movie, as it can be considered almost stand alone content.

Personally, I believe it is currently way too soon to animate Storm Bringer as it came out only a little over a month ago (as of writing this) and has minimal plot necessity as of ch 91, but I do believe it should be either split into 2 movies (a part 1 and part 2) or it would need 8 episodes, likely as an OVA season. If it were to get animated sooner than 55 Minutes or Untold Origins, which I believe to be very unlikely, I feel that it would almost certainly be driven by the financial gains of Chuuya being included, and his popularity alone. Reminder, SB is about Chuuya and not SKK. Dazai’s appearance in SB is proportionally a very small percentage and he’s not even mentioned in the official plot summary.

However, you can argue that SB is starting to have some relevance now, with the recent mention of the Order of the Clock Tower in ch 90 and the increased relevance of sealed ability weapons in ch 91. However, I really do believe that you can’t adapt Storm Bringer before 55 Minutes because of Standard Island and its treaty, it also talks about sealed ability weapons, knowing who Wells is, and 55 Minutes canonically takes place during the “downtime” portion of S3. In fact, here’s Asagiri’s words directly from the Afterward (translation by Yen Press):

“this volume didn’t take place in the past, but rather sometime after the tenth volume of the manga. In other words, it’s a tale about the ‘usual’ detective agency in novel format.” (55 minutes, p 237)

Untold Origins also should be adapted sooner rather than later (at least compared to SB in my opinion) because it’s about Ranpo and Fukuzawa’s shared past, which becomes increasingly relevant ch 70 onwards, as well as the need for the ADA being founded (which ties in with Yosano’s backstory in ch 65-66).

In regards to whether I think each of these would be better suited to a movie adaptation or as multiple regular length anime episodes, it’s mainly due to page count and partly due to the budget difference between the two, as well as how difficult I think it would be to animate each of these based on what needs to be drawn. The anime industry isn’t the fastest to switch to newer technology, hence why we see issues with 3D blending sometimes. I really do think that at the very least, 55 Minutes deserves the movie budget because of how detailed and complex the architecture of Standard Island is described as, as well all the mechanical parts needed for the final battle of the novel. Hate the lizard mouths introduced in Dead Apple all you want, but you can’t deny that the 3D cgi was blended very smoothly. For any of the other novels to be movies, it’s more so because gaiden and BEAST can be considered their own stand alone stories that don’t rely too heavily on the main story in terms of when they take place and get adapted. I feel that SB is more likely to get its own season or an OVA season more so due to its length, but multiple part anime movies have also been done before (ie. the Fate/Stay Night: Heaven’s Feel movies), so it’s not entirely impossible. Especially considering that merely having any Chuuya screen time means that you can expect the profit and popularity to really go up, especially with SKK being on screen together (regardless of whether you love or hate how the fandom tends to push a shipping POV on them).

These are all of course just my hopes and predictions and estimates based on information currently available, so take them with some salt. I’d love to hear opinions on how, when, and why each of the currently non animated novels should be adapted going forward. Also please stop begging the relevant BSD official Twitter pages for SB to be animated next and go read the other light novels you Chuuya simp

[bi-dazai]

ok my bsd predictions for major plot points in the future

1.

If dazai were to be killed off in bsd, chuuya would probably be killed with him in a final act of coded symbiosis.

Tbh tho that's such a major thing that it probably wouldn't happen until when the manga is finishing up so

2.

Chuuya will either become the PM Boss or he'll join the ADA.

So chuuya is strongly suggested in two ways for his future which is HM INTERESTING. So the way that Mori clearly recruits him not just for his ability but for his leadership skills, plus the how chuuya has been developing those skills, is something I was thinking about a lot in S3. Mori is very clearly not happy with Dazai being the heir, even though he was the best choice. Dazai would have probably killed Mori and taken his place by the time he was 20 if odasaku hadn't died. Chuuya has loyalty to the mafia plus the fighting and leadership abilities. He's also got a certain obedience and controllability that if Mori was to step aside and not die he would like. Also something ppl forget is that chuuya is actually good at negotiation and staying calm under pressure, it's suggested that dazai particularly triggers his anger because dazai is an annoying shit who seems to be in canon attached to him whenever they're in the same room.

HOWEVER. Now I don't think I've ever said this on this blog despite me constantly thinking about it but Fukuzawa's ability is the perfect thing for Chuuya, as it has the possibility of actually reigning in corruption. If chuuya joined the ADA he would actually be able to use corruption's ability of throwing black holes without losing control of himself. Arguably that would also get rid of the need for dazai's intervention although it's been established that skk were thought of as a perfect fighting duo for a year before corruption even first manifested in a fight, so I don't think this would kill skk. And chuuya joining the ADA would mean that he and dazai have to interact on the daily. It also means that the mafia is left without any clear heir. People have vouched for kouyou in this situation but I think it's clear that kouyou is being forced to be in the mafia, she's given up on leaving and doesn't want to be there actively.

I don't think the second outcome is very possible plotwise for a few reasons. These are all totally writer's arguments so appeals to logic and plot aren't exactly going to work here, but as a writer myself these are the planning issues that stick out extremely badly if we get chuuya to defect:

- it would have to take something extremely major to get chuuya to leave the loyalty of the mafia

- chuuya becomes even more OP. asagiri kafka has said that though he really likes chuuya (as evidenced by the amount of goddamn times chuuya comes up in the novels), he avoids putting him in the manga because chuuya is extremely overpowered. If he and dazai were logically paired together for each issue every arc would be solved far too quickly for things like character development, or like...story...to take place. This is why chuuya is constantly sidelined. You have to actively make it so that chuuya isn't on people's minds constantly, or get him out of the picture immediately, so that your narrative can actually develop. Chuuya is honestly a mistake in a writing sense. But he's a strong character and he and dazai were written in tandem to each other so he's absolutely unremovable. A character like chuuya NEEDS to exist. So the way chuuya has been toned down is Corruption. Chuuya's ability by itself is just...incredibly powerful. He's virtually indestructible. However Corruption, the ultimate form, is shown to actively kill chuuya. The only times we've seen corruption used is cthulu, shibusawa, and shibusawa big dragon, all extreme threats. So chuuya's life when he's pulled out as the deus ex machina is tied to dazai. This makes chuuya's unchecked OP a little less unchecked and a little less OP. Chuuya is actually a fantastic example of why you CAN have OP characters, you just have to write them a certain way.

However in writing them a certain way, the most stupid thing you could do for your narratives would be to bring corruption under control, and to bring chuuya into the group of protagonists. you have to find excuses in every problem to why chuuya can't just come out and handle this himself, like you were before but now dazai's absence isn't an issue PLUS your readers are paying more attention to chuuya because he's around all the time.

So yeah, chuuya being in the ADA would be a bad choice narrative wise unless it was for like...one arc or smth. Chuuya becoming the next boss of the port mafia is wayyyyy more likely to me. I don't think chuuya would like it but he's really the most obvious choice

3.

Dostoyevsky/rat arc is going to be mega arc/s.

one of the exciting things abt this series is that I have no idea how long this conflict with the rats will go on for. At first I thought it would be an occasional and ongoing plotline that is explored not as one big set arc but interspersed with other non-rat arcs. However by the way it's going it looks like we have two options, either 1) the rat issue is being dealt with across one mega-arc or 2) rat issues will still be dealt with like I thought, interspersed, but each time they pop up it will be a mega-arc like it has been so far. I genuinely don't know how this will be resolved, and I'm actually kind of wondering if the characters will finally leave kanagawa prefecture and maybe head to Russia to defeat the rats. I think this could be a good start to travelling the characters to settings outside yokohama.

4.

Agatha Christie is going to be matched up to Ranpo.

Like Dostoyevsky is dazai's foil because their works IRL were similar in tone, Agatha Christie and Ranpo match up in that way perfectly. We've already met the trick foil (we thought he would be, but he wasn't) for Ranpo in Poe (IRL Poe actually did write mystery at times, and his works do contain elements of suspense and unknown). Ranpo is clearly going through hell in this arc which makes me feel like he's going to start being a much more major character in the future.

Agatha Christie and Edogawa Ranpo's works both fit in the mystery genre and were both alive irl around the same time. They both played historic roles in developing the mystery genre of their language's literature and are pretty well-known in non-literature circles because mystery often has a pulp, mass-consumable aspect to it. It was actually surprising to me that they were made into characters considering the other characters are named after authors of much "higher grade" Literature, as in Literature capital L. Mystery authors especially like Agatha Christie don't fit that bill, but they've played a central role in developing the fiction industry so I don't find it odd. Plus there's a bit of a debate what counts as Literature and every person has different opinions. Mine differs to asagiri kafka's which evidently seems to be that if the author has had a significant impact on the literary field then their works become Literature, thus they become 文豪 (Literary masters), thus they become a bsd character. I think that's fair, even if it isn't what I would personally say Literature is. This is par for the course tho lol, p sure any person who is into Literature will have a different thing to say about what gets that capital L.

But yeah, I think Ranpo and Christie are clearly going to be each others foils.

5.

Christie is going to be cold. Like. COLD.

Dostoyevsky is more obvious evil, it shows on the surface. But Christie will have a polite veneer, a charm to her. We've seen her in a shot, and she sits tall, she enjoys tea, she dresses expensively and lives in colourful rooms. But she had no hesitation to destroy Yokohama if a situation wasn't dealt with within half an hour in the cruelest way possible. Christie was actively ready to incinerate Yokohama alive, that was her first instinct when contacted for help. Christie very clearly has a lack of care for the lives of others, OR she wants to destroy Yokohama in particular. However considering this is the goal of Dostoyevsky and Christie will probably be the next major villain after Dostoyevsky, repeating that goal and motivation is pretty boring and not very bungou stray dogs.

6.

The order of the clock tower will not come to yokohama first.

The Guild were the ones to come to yokohama and threaten it up close. The order of the clock tower was a major threat to yokohama from across the continent. That's terrifying. The ADA/Mafia will have to work proactively

7.

The end of the clock tower will have major repercussions.

The order of the clock tower seems to have its claws in everything and has a tight maintenance of leadership and control over almost every gifted organisation we've met. The Order seems to literally keep order. But they've clearly got a goal with sending the guild and the rats after the book. If the order is destroyed then certain aspects of gifted society slip loose and create new problems. This will probably be the creator of an arc or two after the order arc is over.

8.

Chuuya's backstory is linked to Dazai's.

Chuuya was used by the military and experimented on until he could contain a god of destruction, after which he went haywire, blasted a huge crater in yokohama, and became a feral child.

Dazai was...we don't know. The furthest back we can tell is that some time in his early teens he was taken in by Mori. Before that he was apparently wandering around trying to find some kind of emotion, something to make him feel. He eventually found that with the violence and adrenaline rush of the mafia.

Now I don't think that dazai is a psychopath. It's easy to say he is with the way he seems to talk about the hole in his heart and the absence and emptiness. However dazai very very clearly cares. He cares about odasaku, he cares about atsushi, he cares about the ADA, and he even cares about chuuya (this is not my shipper brain talking, I am literally talking about canon). Dazai very clearly CARES. He isn't a psychopath.

My belief is that dazai is the most clear argument for my case that the series is about mental illness and self worth. Dazai very clearly has a major depressive disorder.

I also think that dazai is extremely traumatised. Obviously he's traumatised by being in the mafia at 15 and by odasaku's death, but I also think dazai may have been traumatised even before then.

Atsushi is dazai's mentee, the half of shin soukoku. He's shown to have childhood trauma. Akutagawa also has childhood trauma. Chuuya has childhood trauma. This may be a coincidence but almost every main character in this series has some form of early trauma.

Dazai IRL was not called Dazai Osamu. Dazai Osamu is actually a very sad name but Dazai's birth name is Tsushima Shuuji. IRL dazai/Tsushima was the son of a rich family that lived in Aomori prefecture (which is very rural lol). Dazai had an absent father and a sick mother and wasnt raised by his parents but rather by servants and his aunt. His father died when he was young (not that he got very old) and his life was plagued by constantly running off with girls, getting his allowance cut for being a marxist, and, yes, suicide attempts.

So my ideas for how this may translate into bsd dazai is this:

- dazai ran away from home when he was young

- dazai never had a good parental figure

- dazai is from a rich family in a rural area very far away. Like for those who don't know Aomori is at the northern tip of Honshū, just below Hokkaido. Yokohama is just south of Tokyo. The region in between is mostly forest and smaller cities. Most of Japan's (major) cities are cloistered around Tokyo and Kyoto and Fukuoka which are towards the south. So dazai is a country boy who has wandered japan after running away from home.

- dazai's real name is Tsushima Shuuji and there's a personal reason he's distanced himself from that. This one im not sure about but yeah

- thus follows that why would dazai be so fucked up if he isn't a psychopath and he did come from a rich family? Dazai to me reads that something major happened. In shin skk it's clear that atsushi and alutagawa share a past of abuse at the hands of parental figures and loneliness. With all the similarities and parallels drawn between the characters in skk and shin skk it seems logical to me that chuuya's past of torture may be similar to Dazai's in a way. It would be disappointing to me if dazai's past was covered and it didn't in some way affect him. The clearest parallel between skk is that they both lacked parental figures most if not their entire lives.

There's also this comment that dazai makes when the head of atsushi's orphanage dies. It's that relationships with fathers are messy and even if they were terrible it's natural to cry. This seems like bsd dazai may share irl dazai's father's death early in his life. It's hinted therefore that dazai's father was either abusive or neglectful and died when dazai was younger.

Anyway this went longer than I thought it would but I invest far too much brain time into bsd so it's gotta seep out at some point lol

[leonawriter]

Smoke and Fox-Fire

Read it on AO3

Fandom: Bungo Stray Dogs/Mononoke

Characters: Dazai, Tanizaki, Ranpo, others mentioned/minor appearances. Background skk.

Summary: Dazai comes to a decision, Tanizaki is enlisted and then mildly traumatised, and Ranpo realises that he had made an error of judgement.

Notes: References to less than ideal childhood situations, and potential BSD manga spoilers.

(Part three of the “Not All Kitsune Have Nine Tails” ‘verse. Follows Denning Down.)

...

It was mid-afternoon, so far nothing interesting or dangerous had happened yet, and for the most part, it had been a day of normal work activity- with the only very recent addition of Dazai's more sensitive hearing picking up on more than he would have normally, and the way his tail moving around without him able to actually control it to the fine degree that he sometimes wished he could meaning that things would sometimes... wind up falling off tables. 

Things like pens, and pencils, and Kunikida's paperwork...

Anyway, Dazai was bored, and a bored Dazai was never good for the office, far more than a Dazai who simply didn't want to do his work, and part of the reason why he was bored was... it had a lot to do with how much he'd hated pushing all of the things that had made him feel less like he was trying to fit into some role he wasn't suited to play for the past- it hadn't quite been twenty years. A fair bit less. But it was long enough.

Long enough he couldn't really remember that memory he knew that both Atsushi and Chuuya had 'seen' somehow, of him as a small child. Toddling toward his mother, an indistinct person his younger self had only referred to as Mofa-Mofa, something that had had a somewhat less indistinct man laugh and try to correct him to "Mama."

"He knows what he's saying. Don't you, Osamu? Because you like soft things. And Mama is soft."

Reaching out and up to her hair, to clamber into her lap, and getting visibly annoyed when the only thing he touched was hair, and as nice as his seat was, there was no soft thing to grab at or hold onto. 

"Not as soft as he thinks, it seems. Maybe he just got attached to that ratty old sweater you were wearing for a while?"

She'd laughed, barking - a little too slow, and he'd somehow been able to hear that even then - and just said, "Maybe."

It'd been a lie, of course. He knew that now. More than that, Atsushi and Chuuya both knew all of the sordid details of childhood - had discovered them with him, all of the repressed memories of how his father had grown colder and had taken his mother for granted, of how she had left-

Too much time meant too much time to think. 

It wasn't that the memories themselves hurt, exactly. They were so old, and he could barely remember any of the people in them, even thinking of himself as that small, soft person with no hard edges and no bandages wrapped around his small limbs was an almost alien thought.

Thinking about them for too long meant thinking about what they meant, though, and although there were many thing he had let go of, that he'd had to let go of, in order to stop and break away from everything and let himself start anew, even though he knew the truth... it was one thing to know, to come to a decision and move on. Another to know what to do after that.

Perhaps, he wondered, he still held more than a little resentment. Not directed at anyone in particular, anymore. But just in general.

The Agency's clock ticked another half hour gone. 

Dazai blinked up at the ceiling from the sofa, and reassured himself with the familiar buzz of office noise and voices.

The point was - the point of it all was, that he didn't exactly enjoy going out and having to hide the fur under his skin in such a way, when it didn't want to stay under like that. It made him itch all over, like he'd wrapped his bandages on too tight, or too roughly, something catching at him all the time whenever he paid it too much mind.

The thought kept striking him, as he went to and from Chuuya's to the Agency and out again for other reasons, that even with everything hidden, someone would see him, and it wouldn't matter to them that they shouldn't be able to - someone from outside of the Agency or even the mafia who wasn't a spirit or demon themself would see, they would notice something off. He'd say something wrong. A stumble on the pavement. His heart would hammer in his chest.

He'd never felt so uneasy with the thought of being seen before, and he wasn't so bothered about it when he was in the Agency or Chuuya's place, so what was it that was so different? Other than the sheer amount of people, of course. And people he didn't know. People who would just look at him, and judge him.

It felt like having a loose bandage somewhere on his arm, or his neck, which he hadn't been able to fix and that at any moment, might unravel further than he could handle, but he was always a little too far from somewhere private enough to fix it.

...

"Ta-ni-za-ki-kun...."

He jumps maybe a foot in the air from where he'd been sitting at his desk, or it feels that way, and it shows by the amount of strange, unrelated letters and words that had just appeared on the report he'd been working on for the simple recon mission he'd been sent on yesterday. 

It wasn't unsalvageable. At least he hadn't already pressed send.

"Uh... Dazai-san?" 

It wasn't as if he's not used to Dazai's antics. He is. He's just not so used to them being aimed at him - Kunikida, yes, and Atsushi now too, but up until now he'd somehow managed to not get hit with the worst of it.

Perhaps this was only happening because Kunikida and Atsushi were outside, and from the sounds of things working on Atsushi's training.

And now his ex-mafia coworker is staring at him with wide eyes and a too-wide smile on his face for it to mean anything good, and those new ears of his are pointed upright at attention on the top of his head. Which would be more unnerving if it wasn't the second day of it, and he hadn't already seen Atsushi transform often enough to almost become used to human beings with animal features.

...Well. Mostly human, in Dazai's case. Which was also going to take some getting used to.

"You see Tanizaki-kun, I have a problem and I was starting to realise that you might be the only one I can go to who might be able to help me with this problem. You will help me, won't you?"

He found himself staring. Dazai didn't move. He only blinked.

"I, uh... are you sure I'm the only who can help you? I mean, there's everyone else, and-"

"Nooo.... no, see, it absolutely has to be you. I mean, as far as I'm aware, you're the only one I know who uses illusions. So it has to be you."

"Uh-" For a moment, his mind blanks out. But that's when one of Dazai's new ears twitches, and he starts to get a sinking feeling. "No... no. No, I'm not just following you around all the time so you can go out like that in public. It'd fail the moment I bumped into you anyway, so it'd definitely not work at all."

He gets the feeling that he's either said the wrong thing or there's something he hadn't thought of, because Dazai isn't smiling as much anymore, but hopefully if he's realised how this won't work he'll leave him alone and then he can just get on with his work.

"You misunderstand," Dazai says, sounding far too serious for someone several years older than him who's still crouching on the floor so that his head's just barely looking over the top of his desk. "I wasn't asking for you to use your ability. What I was after was a... second opinion, of sorts. I wanted to know how you use it."

"You- okay?"

"I need to know. Because of reasons."

"Don't you already know how my ability works, though...?"

And now he didn't just look serious, or frowning, he looks downright frustrated, and he doesn't even know what he's said wrong.

"If you want to say something, just come out and say it, Dazai."

Ranpo's voice comes loud and clear over the noise and distance of the office between them.

Ranpo, who doesn't seem all that surprised, or at all bothered, by what was going on. Which at least eased up the pressure of the idea that whatever was going on, it was another imminent disaster or emergency.

Dazai hesitated, and then stood up, which now meant that instead of looking across his desk to meet his eyes, Junichiro needed to look up given he was still sitting down. His hands were in his coat's pockets and his expression wasn't really giving all that much away, but something about the tail and ears moving - even if he didn't know all that much about animal body language, or fox behaviour for that matter - suggested that he was agitated. Which wasn't saying much, but when it was Dazai, and he wouldn't have known that if he couldn't see the fur move...

"What I've been trying to say is, I'm not asking for the sake of learning about your ability. I already know as much as I need to know about that. What I'm asking for is... I need to be able to learn more about how to control my own illusions. I thought that asking you would help."

For a moment, he didn't say anything, because he didn't know what to say-

"But you don't have an illusion-based ability?"

"Do the changes to my body look like the result of an ability to you, Tanizaki-kun?"

"W-well, when you say it like that- not... not really... no? I just. It's strange to think of you having that kind of ability- uh... is that even the right kind of term for something like this?" He sighed, and saved his work. Kunikida was going to be annoyed about the drop in productivity but... "Hang on, I'm guessing if this isn't an ability, that means the Director's doesn't work on it, right?"

"Nope." It was kind of unnerving, the way that while he glanced over to see Ranpo looking in their direction, Dazai didn't move at all. Actually, no, that wasn't true - a part of him did move. A single ear. "Youkai magic doesn't run on the same rules. Because of that, Dazai might be hit by magic that he'd have automatically nullified if it was an ability." Which wasn't worrying or anything at all, clearly. And reminds him of what they'd been told about Lovecraft. Which made remembering what he'd managed to do feel like some sort of small miracle. "Which is both good and bad. But right now, the important thing is that no, the Director's ability doesn't work on it, so if Dazai wants to take control back..."

...He'll have to learn it the same way everyone else does, if they aren't in the Agency, Tanizaki finished. 

"I guess that does make sense," he admits. 

"So... how did you first get Light Snow under control? Unless-"

A sudden warmth from behind is all of the warning he gets before he feels familiar arms wrap around his front, and Naomi's speaking from right beside his ear.

"No, nii-sama did have some control back then, didn't you~?"

His mind goes blank against his will as the memories come to him, and it's only partly because he still really wishes that she'd stop acting like that and making a scene in public-

It's like how when Atsushi had brought up their entrance exams. He could still barely remember his other than the sheer terror and adrenaline that had kept him going. He'd prefer not to remember, if that was an option. He'd really like not to.

"I, uh," his brain stutters back to being able to function, which is harder than it should be with Naomi still clinging onto him. "That's- how about, we just go with, um- something simple. Like, what your upper and lower limits are."

Dazai blinks at him.

He gets the unnerving feeling that he's just broadcast everything he'd just been thinking about and not meant to outright say without having needed to say anything. For once, he doesn't mind Naomi's public clinging, because it gives him that slight feeling of support that he really needed. Even if he did wish she wouldn't-

"Okay. I think that I can safely say that I know what my upper limits are... but I really need to figure out how to do anything smaller than that."

"I... okay? Okay. So. What... is that, exactly?" What's making this awkward is that he's really starting to wish that Dazai had been able to go to, say, Kunikida about this. At least he had experience knowing how to teach people! Meanwhile, he just had experience being anxious and not knowing what to do, unless it meant infiltration and covert ops, which was exactly why the Port Mafia's boss had singled him out from everyone at the Agency to do some sort of exchange program thing at some unspecified time- he had no idea what he was doing, or where to start. "I mean, are those upper limits big, or is it, something we're going to need to work on later as well?"

"My upper limits get people hurt, they don't need improving-"

"Kitsune illusions aren't hard light, Dazai," Ranpo says, cutting across the conversation and whatever Junichiro himself might have been about to say, and he sounds annoyed, frustrated. It's his 'people are being stupid' voice. "They just show people things that aren't there! Don't talk tough when all you can do is-"

"Allow me to correct myself, then," Dazai says, and all of a sudden Junichiro is wishing he was somewhere else, anywhere else. And, mostly, that Dazai wasn't using that tone of voice on another member of the Agency like that. "My upper limits have hurt people. Is that enough?"

"But it's impossible."

Dazai seems to just... stare, unreadable, while their best detective calms down. What was strange was that he knew perfectly well how destructive illusions could be - he'd done things he wouldn't normally even consider, when people had threatened Naomi, endangering lives easily, even. But Ranpo and Dazai were talking about kitsune illusions like they were something entirely different.

"...I'm sure that if you asked," Dazai said, the words sounding heavy and weighted, "about what happened the other day... then Kunikida-kun would say otherwise."

Junichiro had seen and heard things the other day that had told him as much, but if he hadn't believed it then, the odd noise that somehow came out of Ranpo when Dazai said that confirmed that there was definitely something up with him as well. He had to wonder if maybe he was showing it more because now it wasn't just him, but Dazai, and everyone else, so he felt more comfortable about it.

Part of him hoped that was the case, at least.

He feels Naomi hold him tighter, and the fact that her hands had stopped wandering a while back says a lot about how she just wants to have someone to hold onto as well, right now.

"...Inari bless you," he hears Ranpo say, quietly enough that if he hadn't been straining his ears to hear it, he thinks he probably wouldn't have. "That was you. You were- I mean, of course it was you, but I just- thought that-"

"Does any of that even matter? All that matters right now is me figuring out how to get a hold of and control what I can do now."

"From... scratch."

I was wrong, Junichiro admits to himself in the privacy of his own mind, watching the exchange in front of him, Dazai slipping back into his mafia game face isn't the scariest thing in the world. 

The scariest thing in the world is Ranpo looking like he hasn't got a clue what's going on anymore.

...

Inari bless you is what keeps circling around in Ranpo's head, even through the rest of what he's saying, the rest of what Dazai's saying, even though he knows the others are watching.

Somehow, the fact that it had been Dazai who'd been the second mononoke, who'd come into work the next day small and red and fluffy and acting like everything was new, had caught him off guard. Because it was Dazai, who was one of his few equals in terms of intellect and smarts in not just the Agency, but anywhere. 

Because it was Dazai, he'd just assumed without even thinking, that he'd just... forgotten everything, somehow. 

With a mononoke that strong, it would have made sense if Dazai were older. And if he was just as young as he said he was, then to have become as powerful that quickly made sense too, because it was Dazai.

But there were two different ways a mononoke could be created.

One was the most common way - a spirit got mixed up with a human, or human emotions, and when everything got intense enough, usually because of grief or anger or confusion or hate or just needing things to be sorted out right, a mononoke would be born. Drawing people in and destroying them. Things that weren't supposed to exist, and that had to be exorcised.

The other way... was by the spirit and human sides of the equation being mixed up right from the start. Both more stable, but also a potential ticking time bomb if things really went wrong-

Hanyou. Half-human kids. 

They weren't exactly unheard of, they weren't discriminated against or anything. They were just... rare. Because things went wrong. Because humans could be cruel, and petty, and just as fickle with their attentions as they thought cats were. People got hurt, and... the kids usually got caught in the crossfire.

Usually it wasn't too bad. Usually they could handle things, found their own place in the world, settled down either on one side or the other, or found a decent middle ground.

Dazai, though - if this was true, then Dazai was the worst case scenario, where none of that happened and they never did, and it- explained too much. About everything.

Dazai wasn't just young, he was practically a kit still, by normal adult kitsune standards, but by human standards he was already an adult. Not one thing or the other. Having somehow never learned anything.

"All right," Ranpo said, "how about we start off slow, then? Basics. I'm nekomata, not kitsune, but I'm not stupid, I do know some things you should be capable of. Other than the shapeshifting."

"But I want control," Dazai said, somehow sounding like he was whining even when he was almost completely blank-faced. "Not to learn how to do more."

"This is control. Most of what you should be able to do is going to come naturally to you at some point, so it's better you learn now, rather than have it all blow up in your face."

Again, he holds back from saying.

He knows he isn't good at reading when things are rude or not when talking with people, but Dazai's like an adult cat who's forgotten how to use his claws. Or what his whiskers do.

Which isn't even exactly right, because as a hanyou, Dazai probably hadn't ever even learned in the first place to be able to forget.

He sighed, when Dazai still wasn't doing anything.

"Hey, Tanizaki - you don't think about using your ability, right? Like, it's got to be activated on purpose, but it's like Kunikida's, you just do it."

"Uh- yeah, I... I think that's pretty much how it works? I just-"

"Right," he continued, now that the important things had all been said, "so just - stop thinking about how and starting thinking of... I don't know, what's the smallest and most simple thing you can think of, Dazai?"

For a moment, no response. Which was starting to get more than a bit frustrating, because it wasn't like he was asking much-

And now Dazai was probably thinking he was being subtle, which he wasn't. 

As subtle as a kit with a crush pulling that person's tail, Ranpo thinks snidely, but doesn't say. Then again, Poe was an adult human and he was just as clueless about how these things went. Not to mention how long Yosano had been trying to drag Kunikida into loosening up, and... well. It wasn't like it was anything out of the ordinary, he supposed, but what it was, was frustrating to watch. Even Poe's cluelessness got frustrating at times, as cute as it was.

"Come on, Dazai, you can think of something, we haven't got all day, you know..."

He just hoped that mentioning something small didn't get them a miniature - if illusionary - mafia executive in the offices.

"Uh, Ranpo-san, do you really think it's a good idea to push him like that, I mean- if-"

"Psh- Dazai only knows what he can do under pressure." He rolled his eyes, and then looked back at Dazai. "You're not going to get anything done if you think it's a great idea to put a mental block on things just because you think you're suddenly dangerous just because you blew up one time. So stop making a firestorm of a little fox-fire."

He stares for a moment longer, just long enough to smugly catch the slight expression of shock on the former mafioso's face, and turned away again, reaching back into the open bag of sweets he'd mixed up earlier.

He's already started to lose track of how many he's chewed on by the time he hears footsteps outside near the door - that could only be Kunikida and an exhausted and frustrated Atsushi, back from their training session - and already starting to wonder how long it's going to be before he gets any more good cases, his hand reaching back for another one, when-

"Dazai." Kunikida's voice was level and quiet, which on anyone else was probably supposed to be giving the impression they were keeping their cool, but on Kunikida... "Why is there fire floating over your paperwork?"

He blinked.

The snack still in his hand, he twisted so that he could turn to see, and there Dazai was, staring at the pile, which certainly looked like it was only a moment away from being set on fire.

"I can't touch it," Dazai was saying, dramatically serious. "If I touch it, then it's going to turn real, and then it really will burn all my paperwork. And my desk. Which would be awful. Wouldn't you agree, Kunikida-kun? So as you can see, there's absolutely no way I can do any of it."

Kunikida stared at the fox-fire with the intensity of someone who really didn't know what was going on, whose brain had already come close to breaking just the previous day. 

Slowly, he turned away from Dazai's desk, eyes wide like he was questioning all of his life choices at once.

"Is... is that true?"

Tanizaki just shrugged awkwardly. Kenji was staring, but seemed more entranced with the idea that it was possible than anything. Atsushi seemed like he was the only one who wasn't really sure what to believe, which made sense, given he was one of the only other youkai in the office.

Ranpo just grinned, and purposefully put the snack into his mouth.

"How should I know? It's Dazai, isn't it?"

Of course he knew the fire was just fake. It was the same stuff foxes in the forests used to both mess around with humans and to lead them back on track. But he couldn't just lead everyone around by the hand. For one thing, they had to figure things out for themselves, there had to be at least some things they could do without him - and for another thing, things would just be boring if he did.

...

AN: "Mama" is a common way for young children to call their mother, as much as "Haha-ue" and "Kaa-san". 

"Mofu-mofu", meanwhile, is the Japanese onomatopoeia for "soft", and "fluffy". 

Baby Dazai was basically mixing the two up and calling her "Muffy" or something like that - because his mama was fluffy, of course.

My first experience with hanyou was Inuyasha, but the way it was handled (only human on a new moon) annoyed me a lot, and I feel wasn't a good portrayal of a half-human character, so... this is more a mix of other things I've seen since then.

[memswrites]

2017 Fic Writing Round-Up

AO3 Total Word Count: 23,955 Overall Word Count: -kept poor track of that this year-

Word Count By Fandom: 

Bungou Stray Dogs: 17,773

91 Days: 2,040

Yuri! On Ice: 1,798

Boku no Hero Academia: 1,221

Alien/Prometheus: 1,123

Fics Posted 

Finished One Shots & Drabbles: 50

Posted on AO3

Posted on RP blog

Posted on memswrites

WIP Fics: 1

AO3 - Sugar & Spice | Bungou Stray Dogs | Fitzsushi

Fics Unseen

WIP Fics: 6

Fandom Events Written For: 

Soukoku Week

Port Mafia Week

Otayuri AU Zine

OWC Gift Exchange

Voltron AU Zine

Q&A

Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought this year, less, or about what you predicted in January? 

I hadn’t actually planned on writing any fic in January tbh but here we are-

What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted in January? 

Bungou Stray Dogs; Fitzsushi. I also wrote a different brand of dark than I’m used to when working on Necron, so there’s that. 

What’s your own favorite story of the year? Not the most popular, but the one that makes you happiest? 

Probably Reverence, because it’s a concept I’ve never written before and I got to play around with a character that I’ve never written before. 

Did you take any writing risks this year? What did you learn from them? 

I don’t know if it’s so much as risks, but I played around with style and trying to use different types of those literary devices they tried to teach you about in school. I learned that I work surprisingly well with present tense... As well as that I actually have the skill to write longer pieces if I choose to do that in the future. 

Your best story this year. 

Uhm. Frick. I’m gonna go with Nostalgie. I really loved the concept around it and it’s just. Pretty. 

Your most popular fic of the year. 

Noise Maker. Which was a god damn shocker, let me tell you. 

Story that’s most under appreciated. 

I don’t really think any of my fics are under appreciated; I love the feedback I’ve gotten this year. That being said, I guess the stuff written for rare pairs has gotten less traction, but they’re rare pairs, so. XD

Most fun story to write.

Paint Drops, easily. I die every time for domestic SKK. 

Story with the single sexiest moment. 

Roulette, but that’s because I’m garbage and have a thing for gun play in fics. 

Most “Holy crap, that’s wrong, even for you” story. 

...Necron. 

Story that shifted your own perceptions of the characters. 

Mmm. I want to say any of the drabbles that I wrote for my Akutagawa blog, mainly because it forced me to seriously consider and think about his motivations and his perceptions of the world.

Hardest story to write. 

Roulette. I kept having issues trying to stay in character while also getting what I wanted out of the fic itself. I think it turned out pretty bangin’ in the end though. 

Biggest disappointment. 

In general I feel that some (a lot) of my drabble endings feel rushed/incomplete. It’s something I’d like to change in 2018 and improve on.

Biggest surprise. 

Noise Maker’s reception in the BNHA fandom. Hooooboiii.

Most unintentionally telling story. 

Probably Nostalgie. Or Aftercare. I think both of those pieces in particular highlighted a lot of things that I hadn’t intentionally gone in to do but I liked the results nonetheless. 

Favorite opening line(s:) 

Their red string of fate was less a string, and more a blood-soaked cloth that bound them tight to one another. -Metem Psychosia

They call him the Mafia’s Dog. Rabid. Wild. An attack beast with a scent for blood. -III

Favorite closing line(s:) 

He’d never shared a bed before. He wouldn’t be doing it again. But he’d do it for the moment. -Ephemeros

What was this woman, he wondered, to look like that and look at him – and smell like comfort instead of rot? -Sakura

Favorite five lines from anywhere. 

Avilio makes a point of withdrawing the gun, slow, letting his lips cling to the metal like he’s sad to let it go, like he wants it in his mouth and down his throat and choking out his life. Spit trails along the barrel, slick and shiny, leaving a bridge of it from those longing lips right down to the muzzle. Slight, almost not even there, the tip of his tongue flicks along the end of it, circled around where a bullet could have killed him, but didn’t. -Roulette

The ease of falling into that emotionless trap should have washed over him. Feeling off, pleasure on. Plenty of people did it; it wasn’t that hard. He should have been able to give into the ego-boost this fucker’s tone should have given him, but it sinks in deep like a knife through ribs that it’s not an ego boost he wants - especially not from someone who, as Chuuya looks down into those listless blue eyes, only covets him for the heat between his legs and little else. He can’t fucking do it. He’s always wanted more. -Easy

Master told him to end them all. To feast. A decadent banquet had been laid before his feet in the form of the weak and the damned, and at Master’s insistence he was to devour each like he was starved. Send them down the gullet of the void… Appease the once-contained monster that sang sweet carnage in his head. It had been held at bay through his control alone for so long… Yet his Master had freed It and stripped It of inhibition.More, It wanted. More, more, more – And Master told him to listen to It, so listen he did.Those black-spire buildings rang familiar somewhere between the hunger and the order, but it wasn’t enough to jar him from his Purpose. He was a tool… He was servile. A monster with a loosened chain that led right back to Death itself and Death was greedy in its pursuits. Life was little more than sustenance, after all. -Tumblr Drabble

The air was still, a calm death that settled thick within the walls of the warehouse, a claustrophobic fog that threatened to suffocate. In the center, sat a boy, with blood up to his ankles. His cloak was too big for him, swallowing his body in a trembling shroud, but it wasn’t the body itself that trembled. The fibers of the cloak vibrated, a rhythmic undulation of something trying to get back out - the beast within he’d tried so desperately to control, but some rabid dogs are too feral to contain. He could hear it, in the back of his mind. It was the ravenous snarl of that thing inside him, always hungry, always laying in wait to consume, wanting its chance to devour. Insatiable should have been its name, but it deigned to be called Rashomon from the moment he had discovered it, and from the moment he had given it name it’d tormented him with its presence. He couldn’t control it. He never had. He never would. -Tumblr Drabble

Chuuya pauses his bite, and looks over at Dazai. The bags that were there while he was sleeping still hang under his eyes, somehow more than they had before. Last time they had gone through with Corruption, it had been out of necessity, and it hadn’t left Chuuya looking so weary. What a waste of the ability, doing it for show, letting it drag out the way it had.Dazai can tell that Chuuya’s not particularly convinced by his assertion, though he supposes that’s fine; he’s not convinced that Mori took it to heart, either, and can see it in the shrug that Chuuya gives before he goes back to his soup.“You’re going to unravel those if you keep picking at them, you useless mummy.” -Aftercare

Top five scenes you’d have illustrated from anywhere. 

^everything up there tbhhh.

Fic writing goals for next year. 

Finish up all my WIPs.

Actually get through a multi chap fic you COWARD. 

HIT 100,000 WORD COUNT, NO BIGGIE-SMALLS.