#this happened like 6 hours ago and im still feeling very wtf about it lol

[kangaruined]

ranting abt my roommate in the tags dont look at me

[rigelmejo]

march 3/15/2021

im trying to read through tae kim’s grammar guide right now because i’m officially further in the nukemarine LLJ  memrise decks (there’s tae kim grammar guide sections in there) than i am in actually reading the grammar guide. And obviously these example sentences in the memrise deck would teach me more if i CLEARLY understood why they’re like how they are. which i... need to read the grammar guide section to understand lol.

my goal rn with japanese is? to get further in the nukemarine LLJ decks than i did last time. I’ve already mildly accomplished that (have done officially MORE of the tae kim section than before, have NOT redone the 190 common words i did last time i did this though). there are about 400 more cards in this tae kim section (LLJ 4) and then 1000ish cards in the common word section (LLJ 5). I would love to get them done. 

it would be sweet if i could get them done before April 22?/24? whenever Nier Replicant comes out because then I could play that baby in english and japanese! Then Nier Automata! ToT The Entire thing that kicked me back into wanting to study japanese was my old love for certain video games and desperately wanting to know what their stories/characters are like before translation/localization. So it would be cool if I could play them a little ;-; or at least check out lets plays. 

(which, checking out the kh2 lets play has been going pretty well so far... also that part where namine says “we aren’t meant to exist” and roxas says “how could you say such a thing? even if it were true” he says in japanese like “thats brutal/harsh to say. even if its true.” ...great to know that line is equally raw and heartbreaking in japanese lol. KH2′s localization did real good on like equal vibe to original just like ‘less nuanced’ if that makes sense. also thanks to the chinese hanzi i know now watching the KH2 lets play means i can figure out a lot of noun’s writing even though i don’t catch the pronunciation... also i’m catching a lot of words that mean like ‘beautiful/good’ as in like ‘great move’ and ‘dang’ lol.)

i had to stop myself from redoing the chinese flashcards i’ve done in the past! because i get ‘into a zone’ lol. And i really don’t need to waste time redoing those 2000 cards. i also needed to stop myself from doing the hsk 5-6 cards. because realistically? i know half of them, i should just set a lot to ‘ignore’ on the computer but im too lazy, and i’m learning a lot of vocab from reading right now. i don’t need hsk words to pass any test. The words i’m learning right now in reading are a lot more applicable to the actual shows i watch/things i listen to/things i read. its more useful to me to keep reading. and also to not sidetrack my japanese lol. i have read... 39 chapters this month... this month is only half over! hanshe is truly motivating ToT it also helps the story CONSTANTLY ends on cliffhangers so i keep clicking next chapter. who knows, maybe hanshe will help me kick up my reading speed. it already shaved off 10 minutes per 20 pages - now my 20 pages are down to 30 minutes to read, which is better than a few months ago. hanshe has 155 chapters so i HOPE it speeds up my reading lol.

hanshe is increasing my vocab though, its definitely noticeable over time. and hanshe has really good repetition of vocab which helps with learning and later the payoff means i never have to look up the word in future once its learned while it remains useful to me and i keep being reminded of it. after i get bored of hanshe OR i finish it, whichever comes first, its either back to a priest novel or into another pingxie fanfic written by hanshe’s author. The author did one fanfic that’s only 33 chapters so that would be NICE to do after this one lol ToT

summary of what’s turned out to be my studying methods this month:

Japanese:

reading through grammar guides (the one yue-muffin made and tae kim’s). so just grammar explanation reading.

doing nukemarine LLJ decks (in the ACTUAL order they are in the deck to completion - last time i did like 3 per time and never finished any lol. this is bolded because it’s the primary activity i’m prioritizing). so SRS flashcards. it’s working well right now because i can just put this activity in anytime i have downtime, like when i pause shows (since we know me i gotta take a break from a show every 20 minutes lol). i am bafflingly in a flashcard mood and i’m trying to take advantage of it while i got it. 

*when i feel like it: watching kh2 lets play. so some immersion where i look up words. (and when Nier Replicant remaster releases next month I’m likely to at least a tiny bit try to play it in japanese ToT lol we’ll see)

so grammar reading, srs flashcards covering some grammar/listening/reading/vocab, and some optional immersion.

(a note: i gave up on the japaneseaudiolessons for now because i got bored. its a great resource! i just don’t feel like it right now. and from an efficiency perspective, nukemarine LLJ decks cover vocab, grammar, audio, reading - so I don’t need another resource for that right now).

Chinese:

reading through hanshe. so immersion reading, intensive reading looking up unknown words. (unknown words are happening less so its getting less ‘intense’ lol)

listening to Chinese Spoonfed Audio. so listening to audio flashcards. for building up listening comprehension/repetition to pick up some more common words. (i’ve been doing this during daily walks making it much easier for me to consistently do, doing it mainly to supplement the Reading Heavy study i’m doing, i can drop this and pick it up later if i want since its mostly easy background listening)

*I am slowly rereading the grammar guide on www.chinese-grammar.com for explicit grammar clarification. but this is not a high priority, since I sort of implicitly understand a lot of this and i’m not working on fixing production mistakes yet. i just... miss knowing wtf is going on in the grammar lol.

*when i feel like it: Listening Reading The Glass Maiden/Love and Redemption Novel. I’ve done 2-3 hours of it this past week, but i don’t know when or if I’ll just stop. Thankfully l-r is beneficial somewhat even if i switch up books later. i WANT to L-R you have no idea (to Silent Reading and Guardian REALLY badly lol). But its so time intensive, and requires a lot of focus, and i have to really plan to do it for an hour at a time usually. I am so bad at doing stuff for that long consistently. I was in the mood earlier this week! ToT 

*when i feel like it: watching chinese shows raw. I was super in the mood this month because Word of Honor came out, and Killer and Healer came out, and Rattan came out, and I didn’t want to wait for subs. As a result I watched a LOT of raw episodes this month. However, english subs have caught up and since I’m lazy I’m inclined to just watch the subs - especially since youku ITSELF just put english subs on their most-ahead viewing schedule version of the eps on youku vip. so guess who’s buying youuku vip today? -3-)/ That said... even if I stop for a while, if Rattan subs move too slow I’ll probably watch those raw. And as SOON as 2ha’s drama Immortality drops I am highly likely to watch the raws for that since I likely won’t be able to wait. Watching shows is pretty highly dependent on how much I want to watch something and if subs take a while lol. 

so reading, and listening. and a little listening-reading method too. mainly just working on reading, listening, vocab acquisition. chinese is going good - for a few months now i’ve just had the plan ‘read often while looking up unknown words, and add some listening study activity when i have time.’ It’s simple, and its been working well.  later on down the road i’ll need some explicit grammar clarification again, but this is bare bones enough of a study plan at the moment. i’m clearly picking up words and phrases and hanzi at a reasonable pace. its not the Fastest obviously, but it is causing improvement over time and since i’m enjoying it i see no reason to change it up.

ending things

...who knows WHY i am so well focused this month with so much energy... tbh... i track how many chapters i read a month/audio i listen to/show episodes i watch etc, and this month is like as much as 3 other of my usual months combined. also my japanese has been basically ‘dabbling only’ prior to this month.

 although... maybe in part its how i’ve gotten better at reading hanshe? Reading being easier certainly motivates me TO read more. And watching shows was MUCH easier this month (still not ‘easy’ but following the main plot is) which definitely makes me Want to watch more. Also i am... unbelievably motivated by a challenge. I think i got it in my head that i ‘really want to do more of Nukemarine’s LLJ courses and see how much i understand after them’ and now... i really want them DONE. so maybe the current things motivating me will hold out for a while. 

(On the listening-reading front meanwhile, that activity takes SO much concentration its hard to do if i’m tired, BUT i have so many TRANSLATED novels i want to read recently and honestly its fun hearing the chinese narration and audiobook actors so like... i very much Want to do l-r so i can hear them as i read the translation... immovable object of me tired versus how much i’m interested in them lol ToT).

also thank u thank u @a-whump-muffin for sending me those lets plays because honestly it got me so excited again and its so cool to see them!!! <3 <3 and its so much easier to watch them versus committing to playing a whole game myself just yet ToT 

[lilbasedqueen]

story of my fucking life

First off I wanna start by saying my intention on putting this all out in the open isn’t to tarnish whatever pedestal some people might hold Adam upon. I should’ve have seen from the beginning that he was nothing but a literal walking garbage can.

Adam and I met in September of 2015, at Jamba Juice. He was my manager at the time and not shortly after he quit and I took his job. Somewhere down the line (maybe 5 months) I met and stupidly started dating Adams roommate. This OF COURSE made Adam jealous, because he saw someone have something he wanted, someone who at the time didn’t want him back. Anyway, that shit DID NOT work out, if I ever met anyone WORSE than Adam, it’s Joe. Don’t ever fw a Taurus who’s also a recovering addict, it don’t work. No matter how hard I tried to help him, he never wanted it, never accepted it, I’d bet all the $ in the world he relapsed.

After things ended between Joe and I, I would still talk to and hit up Adam, mainly because he sold me weed. Now at this time, Adam had a girlfriend who he had moved out here from Hawaii and was living with him in the apartment that eventually became ours. I’m not exactly sure what the reasoning was for her leaving, but something made her go back home and thats when Adam and I started messing around. I should’ve took the fact that he so willingly cheated on this girl he was SOOOO IN LOVE WITH as a huge red flag but apparently I’m just as stupid as he is.

February 2016 was the first time Adam and I had sex, when we officially started dating and when I should’ve seen the signs of his narcissistic, emotionally abusive ways. When we first got together it was all about sex drugs and alcohol. I’m not gonna go deeeep into it, cause some stuff really is better left unsaid and unknown, but we spent the majority of almost everyday together drunk and high. We’d drive out to lake mead, Nelson’s landing, state line and back, intoxicated. I had become so infatuated with this BOY who gave me free weed and took me wherever I wanted, I got undeniably caught up in the moment and never once thought about how things would be down the line.

Fast forward to April 2016, my 22nd birthday. That night was when everything started going wrong. My debit card got stolen out of my wallet by someone I thought of like family, someone I trusted. That person, you know who you are, I will never EVER forgive them. Anyway, after that happened, I lost my bank account and all my money with it AND THEN Adam and I came home one day to find the apartment emptied of almost everything, roommates gone. They just packed up and left and I assume it was because of me. Joe was still living there even after Adam and I started dating, talk about awkward. So after these guys moved out and the other fucked me over, it was just Adam, Cloud and I, in a three bedroom apartment we couldn’t afford.

I had started working, Adam had gotten fired from his job. It was just us living off an 8.50/hr paycheck every two weeks.We could hardly afford to eat, but eventually Adam got a job at a restaurant as a server and things were starting to look up...until I first caught him hitting up girls/older women off of Craigslist sex. This continued throughout the entirety of our relationship, while I was pregnant, while I was in labor, and after. He spent the past three years only caring about himself and his shrimp dick.

So, after my first initial catching him talking to bitches, he got his phone shut off and eventually pawned it to pay rent...but somehow he was still managing to meet girls (through his job). I realize how much of an idiot I was and am, for not leaving, for believing his lies of changing, for falling in love with him. He’s become far to comfortable, and any chance he got of me leaving the house, he’d bring a girl up into our room, into our home. We went through about 8-9 roommates before we ended up on our own, and every single person would tell me the same thing: “He doesn’t deserve you.” At a point we had 6 people living in a 3 bedroom apartment, Adam and I had broken up, he broke up with me ONLY so he could fuck a FIFTEEN YEAR OLD GIRL in our house.

Let’s jump ahead, to September 2017, when I found out I was carrying this bum ass niggas baby. My initial reaction was fear, I had never EVER EVER wanted to be pregnant, especially by someone like him, but I was...and I couldn’t even get the pregnancy terminated which was my first choice. How shitty dos that sound? I so badly wanted away from this dude I was gonna have a whole ass abortion to do it. I was 24w pregnant and had only 3 months to completely GROW UP. I had to stop smoking, and drinking, which I had been doing up until the day we found out. Adam and I made a pact that if I couldn’t get high or drunk then neither could he...y’all could imagine how well that worked out. We were now living with his brother and his girlfriend, Adam was working at Carl’s Jr. and WAS STILL CHEATING ON ME WITH CRAIGSLIST WHORES. I just could not believe his thought process, what type of dude cheats on their pregnant girlfriend?! At this point, I was so far along in my pregnancy it was almost like I HAD TO STAY, he made me believe that everything would be different once that baby was earthside.

March, 2018. Zander was born in December and was now three months old. Hold onto your seats cus this where shit gets JUICY. So by this time we had moved out of his brothers house and into a real house, with my friends mom. Adam was now working at Levis, since he just up and quit Carl’s Jr. He was finally making decent money, working good hours to help and PROVIDE for his family like a man should. A friend of his had gave him this cheap ass Obama phone, since he didn’t have one, so that I could call and text him when needed. He hardly ever used that phone to contact me, but instead he again WAS FINDING PPL OFF CRAIGSLIST TO FUCK. Me being the curious cat that I am, I went and looked in that phone to see just who he was talking to and again this is when I should’ve left. Adam was now not only cheating on me with FEMALES, but this dude was LEGITIMATELY hitting up other guys. He was texting someone named Alex, who I at the time assumed was a girl but me being the spy that I am, I put that phone number into my phone and it popped up on Snapchat AS A DUDE!!

So, the year went on and our relationship at this point is nonexistent. I harbored so much hate and anger and resentment toward him I had absolutely no tears left to shed over him and his disgusting ways. By August of 2018, we had moved out of the house, and into the co do we are still currently in. He was at Levis from May 2017 until November, fired yet again from another job. In December he started working at FedEx, and my health was the worst it had ever been. I wasn’t eating, hardly sleeping, my headaches were completely incapacitating me, I couldn’t care for myself let alone my child. I was alone at night from 5-11 while he went to work at FedEx, alone and in pain and left to care for a baby.

Three days before Zanders first birthday, I woke up at 4am on Thursday morning, got out of bed and fell to the ground, where I started having a partial seizure, awake and aware of every going on, unable to move or speak. I was completely STUCK on the ground almost the whole entire time while I waited for my dad to pick me up and take me to the ER. I was in the worst pain of my life, and honestly wished I would’ve just died so I did t have to feel like that anymore. I was brought back to surgery around I think noon, came out around 2pm. Anesthesia is a HELL OF A DRUG, that shit is so crazy bro, almost as crazy as all the shit I put up with.

You’d think after having BRAIN SURGERY, your boyfriend would do anything he could to make life easier for you but shit just went back to the way it always has been. I was the one cleaning, taking care of the baby, cooking, taking care of the dogs. I JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL FROM BRAIN SURGERY and it was back to how shit had always been. All things considered I was feeling better, but it was shitty having your significant other not give a shit about you or your health. Dude could hardly be bothered to visit me in the hospital I had to BEG him to come see me.

Now, we jump ahead to today...2019 and I’ve again caught him on CL hitting up people. At this point Adam is again UNEMPLOYED, hasn’t had a job since March. We haven’t paid Mays rent, can’t pay bills or buy food because he uses MY ebt card as if it’s his. Now, I say people because at this point I have no clue if it’s guys or girls he’s trying to talk to. I had about two other more times where I saw gay stuff that rose my suspicions as to whether or not Adam like boys...I mean I hook up with girls so what’s to be embarrassed about? Right now is May 23, 3 days ago I was on my email on MY PHONE, checking emails like anyone else would, when I saw yet again something from Craigslist. Emails exchanged since JANUARY up until now, between Adam and another guy, talking about stuff they’ve done, Adam asking him if he wants to suck his dick again, and if they can smoke. I realize one reason for his actions is Adams extreme addiction to cannabis. He hits up people online to ‘party and play’, who tf ever thinks their baby daddy is a closet homosexual? People say you can’t be addicted to weed but I assure this nigga is an addict. When he’s not high he’s grumpy and rude and takes everything out on everyone but once he smokes his whole mf mood changes.

I literally feel like my whole last four years of my life is a movie. Who the hell finds out their boyfriend cheated on them with MEN? lol wtf bro, is this even real? But yes, it is, so very real and so very much my life. Adam and I broke up two days ago, and unfortunately for me, I got no where else to go. So for all of you who constantly ask me if I’m okay, if everything’s alright, NO IM NOT OKAY, no everything’s not alright. My life is a fucking prison, and I have nowhere to go to escape him and his absolute toxic ways.

[fineartwhore]

Can you do the entire unusual asks pls for me babe

oh of course lmao

1: Do you ever wish you were someone else?

Umm sometimes I like to pretend I’m someone else but usually that person ends up sucking? So no, I guess not.

2: What is your full name?

Beaver Head William

3: How old are you and how old do you get mistaken for?

Um I’m 22 going on 23 and idk not a lot of people ask my age.

4: Have you ever dyed your hair?

Nah. Never. Just kidding I just realized that literally not a single one o yall knows my hair is blue unless you’ve met me in person.

5: What’s your eye color?

Brown

6: Your opinion about your body and how comfortable you are with it

Um???? It took me a while to get here but I am pretty okay with my body, minus the crippling gender dysphoria literally every single day. Tattoos help me with this though.

7: Do you have any tattoos or piercings?

Uuuuummmmm HELL YEAH! I have like 24 or maybe 25 tattoos and two piercings. 

8: What would you say is your best quality?

Ummm wow good question I guess my ability to stay level headed in 90% of situations and give good advice.

9: What are you really bad at?

Being romantic. Lmao. Also stress management lmao.

10: What talent do you wish you had?

It’s not a talent but wow i really wish i could fucking read.

11: Are you nice to everyone?

I try to be.

12: What do you think about the most?

Wow that is a hard question. Right now all I think about is beating this level on Two Dots, and also Pusheen. I really love pusheen wtf.

13: Things you like/dislike about yourself

Like: My bone structure, my hair, my tattoos, artistic ability

Dislike: My anxiety and assigned gender.

14: What is your least favorite word?

‘Moist.’

15: What is your favorite word?

Amazing

16: Are you more like your mom or your dad?

God I really try to be like my dad. When I was a kid my dad used to tell me I was just like my mother in a really bad way and since then I’ve been like FUCK that

17: Would you ever smile at a stranger?

Uhh unless I was at work and being paid to, probably not.

18: A reason you’ve lied to someone

When I don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings, but usually only about something small or situational.

19: Are you lying about anything right now?

Nah.

20: Have you kissed someone older than you?

Yeah.

21: Do you believe in love at first sight?

No

22: Do you believe in soulmates?

Only in terms of dogs, tbh.

23: Are looks important?

Well yeah just don’t get carried away.

24: Opinion on relationship age differences

As long as its legal, go for it.

25: Would you date someone off the Internet?

I am at the moment lol.

26: Have you ever cried over a boy/girl?

Of course

27: Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?

YES

28: Anyone you’re giving up on right now?

Yeah.

29: Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated?

Yes, definitely.

30: Have you ever liked your best friend?

Idk she went to maine for a few days and i was like really sure i was in love with her and then she came back and i was like oh nvmd idk it was a weird day.

31: How does someone win your heart?

Honestly, my standards have never been very high.

32: What turns you on?

UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

33: What turns you off?

im constantly in a state of turned off tbhhhh

34: Do you get jealous easily?

Not in a relationship way but like if someone i work with or do stuff with gets different treatment than i do im like wtf do they hate me

35: What is your definition of cheating?

I feel like I can’t talk for other people in other relationships because sometimes people are into different things but if u date someone else while I am under the assumption that we are dating, then you just cheated on me pal.

36: Do you forgive betrayal?

Depends.

37: Have you ever been cheated on?

Not that I know of.

38: Have you ever cheated on someone?

No.

39: How often do you listen to music?

Every day.

40: First concert you attended

Beach Boys, but the drummer had just died or was in the hospital or something and so John Stamos played drums.

41: Last movie you watched

I watched the tail end of the Emperor’s New Groove a few hours ago.

42: Favorite type of movie

Idk I don’t really watch them

43: Is there something that happened in your past that you hate talking about?

No literally even terrible, scarring things that happened to me I talk about like hey wanna hear for the thirteenth time about how my piece of shit boyfriend invited me over to his house when i was 16 when his parents weren’t home and touched me and I had no idea how to tell him i didn’t want it because i was a fucking child? me neither. lol. I overshare.

44: Are you good at hiding your feelings?

Uhhhhhh no not at all.

45: Do you fall in love easily?

With dogs, yeah, with people no.

46: Do you think people say I love you too much?

No. Say it all the damn time. Love makes the world go around. Just….never ever stop loving.

47: What’s your favorite holiday?

Halloweeeeeen

48: Are you a forgiving person? Do you like being that way?

Yeah. No.

49: Where’s the most magical place on earth?

There’s this place out in central PA that I drove through once, and like for a few hours beforehand we were just aimlessly driving through trees, and the trees are so thick in pennsylvania that underneath them it looks like night time and then you emerge and it’s like still day time. The sun was setting and I just remember coming up over this hill covered in wind turbines, and it was honestly like nothing I had ever seen. I love feeling small.

50: What’s your “type”?

Um? Someone who gets me and gets that I am a really fidgety person and im really inconsistent about my expression of feelings. 

[lostinthelightss]

literal chaos fire (ch.8)

amazing banner by @downn-in-flames​ / down-in-flames@FFT

find it elsewhere: fft | ao3 | ff.net | hpff learn more: chaos universe link to other chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15 link to missing moments: 5.5, 7.5, 8.5, 15.5

pairing: Lily Luna Potter / OC genre: AU, Humor, Romance rating: mature audiences

summary:

Victoire Weasley is a masters student in infectious diseases handling a devastating break up with her girlfriend of two years. Lily Potter is a first year law student navigating a figurative minefield that is the star quarterback’s unrequited affection. Molly Weasley is pursuing her bachelors in engineering while pining over her best friend - who doesn’t seem to realize it.

Three women, three vastly different lives, all coming together with group chats, family dinners, and a whole lot of chaos.

chapter summary:

James [the older twin]: look, i just came out to have a good time James [the older twin]: and honestly im feeling very attacked rn James [the older twin]: also @Fred [the smart dumb one] are you not gonna say anything??

Fred [the smart dumb one]: lol yeah, fuck you james <3

OCTOBER 30TH, 2021

‘literal chaos fire' (psychiclilz, mollydramatic, VickyBaby) 9:39am

VickyBaby: still on for tonight?? VickyBaby: no one will know what hit em when we show up together

psychiclilz: yeah, but after last night i think im going easy on the drinks

VickyBaby: WHAT??? VickyBaby: its halloween eve VickyBaby: last year you called it ‘hoe christmas eve'

psychiclilz: hey i threw up again last night psychiclilz: i need one night off

mollydramatic: urghhh me too mollydramatic: not the vomiting part mollydramatic: the needing a break part, even if i probably wont

VickyBaby: you both went home hella early, wtf happened??

psychiclilz: i got a drive home after puking in the bathroom sink psychiclilz: it went 0-100 real quick

mollydramatic: *YOU* DID THAT???

psychiclilz: SORRY, I THOUGHT IT WAS BETTER THAN THE FLOOR

mollydramatic: THERE WAS A TOILET TWO FEET FROM YOU mollydramatic: ROSE MADE ME UNCLOG THAT

VickyBaby: ew, now im gonna vom

psychiclilz: call it payback for the couple costume

mollydramatic: bitch

psychiclilz: you know u love me

mollydramatic: ... mollydramatic: ugh i do mollydramatic: fine, i forgive you

VickyBaby: anyways, where'd you go last night mollz? VickyBaby: you usually dont tap out that early...

mollydramatic: just wasnt feeling it mollydramatic: oops, rose is calling! mollydramatic: haha, gotta go mollydramatic: talk soon! mollydramatic: see ya! mollydramatic: text me if you need me! mollydramatic: or dont, ill be busy mollydramatic: hahahhhaha

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Lily Potter, Victoire Weasley) 9:52am

Lily: she's acting really squirrely

Victoire: yeah, somethings off Victoire: kind of like you that night flynn picked us up... Victoire: what did happen between you two?

Lily: how am i supposed to remember? Lily: it was like 2 months ago Lily: psssh Lily: wow, like you remember all ur drunk nights Lily: get real vic Lily: you black out like the rest of us

Victoire: neither of you are good at hiding things Victoire: you know that right?

Lily: shut up, this isnt about me Lily: do you think it had to do with the angel girl? Lily: emily? Lily: and why she left early too?

Victoire: emerson Victoire: idk Victoire: if there was a fight over lysander, dont you think we wouldve heard?

Lily: yeah, you would think...

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Lily Potter, Scorpius Malfoy) 2:07pm

Scorpius: you guys are still coming over tonight right?

Lily: why, are you planning another costume mix up? Lily: i dont think molly will let go of totally spies, so whatever she said, shes lying

Scorpius: i told you last night i had nothing to do with that Scorpius: you asked me not to get involved between the two of you Scorpius: and i havent

Lily: yeah but rose has

Scorpius: i have no control over rose Scorpius: she makes her own decisions Scorpius: i, however, will do whatever she tells me to

Lily: ur such a sub

Scorpius: hey, dont knock femdom til you try it

Lily: VOM Lily: I DIDNT NEED TO KNOW THAT

Scorpius Malfoy set his nickname to rosie's sub.

Lily: oh my god, i think i might actually have to astral project over there just to slap you Lily: *this* is what you break your nickname rule for??? Lily: THIS???? Lily: VOM

rosie's sub: rose would like me to tell you she knows it was you who puked in the sink

Lily: yeah, molly already gave me the third degree Lily: also she cant be okay with that nickname

rosie's sub: actually im fine with it -rose rosie's sub: he vetoed rosie's peggee -rose

Lily: VOM Lily: UGHHHHHHHH

Lily Potter cleared Scorpius Malfoy's nickname.

Scorpius: i thought it was funny -rose

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

‘literal chaos fire' (psychiclilz, mollydramatic, VickyBaby) 2:28pm

psychiclilz: Attachment: 2 Images psychiclilz: VOM

mollydramatic: WHY???? mollydramatic: WHYYYYYYYY mollydramatic: I LIVE WITH HER mollydramatic: I SHARE A WALL WITH HER mollydramatic: oh my god, can you faint from traumatic news? mollydramatic: im seriously light headed mollydramatic: if i die from a heart attack this is your fault

psychiclilz: I KNOW!!! psychiclilz: i actually almost threw up again

VickyBaby: ... VickyBaby: i dont think ill ever be able to look either of them in the face again

mollydramatic: and yet, we're expected to be there in like... mollydramatic: 6 hours

psychiclilz: i actually dont know if we should go psychiclilz: oh god what if shes wearing leather as part of her costume tonight psychiclilz: i will actually have a breakdown

VickyBaby: oh god, i actually just retched

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

‘old fogies' (Fred [the smart dumb one], Lily [ur 15mins older], James [the older twin], Molly [the dumb smart one], Rose [the granger], Vic [the science beb]) 8:38pm

Fred [the smart dumb one]: WOOOOO @Rose [the granger] tell ur bf we are heeeere Fred [the smart dumb one]: let me innn!!! Fred [the smart dumb one]: let me innnnnnnn!!!!!!

James [the older twin]: *shakes gate*

Rose [the granger]: calm down Rose [the granger]: buzz up - 265

Fred [the smart dumb one]: thaaanks rosie

Rose [the granger]: <3

9:14pm 

Vic [the science beb]: SORRY!!! Vic [the science beb]: it took a little longer than we expected Vic [the science beb]: plus there's no parking on scorps street

Rose [the granger]: buzz up - 265 Rose [the granger]: WAIT WHO TF IS DRIVING???

Lily [ur 15mins older]: after last night im taking a night off from drinking, so DD

Rose [the granger]: good, dont throw up in scorps sink

James [the older twin]: THAT WAS YOU???? James [the older twin]: OH MY GOD, THAT IS WEDDING STORY POTENTIAL!!!

Molly [the dumb smart one]: fukc yu james, i cleaned itt up, is my story

Lily [ur 15mins older]: yeah, fuck you james Lily [ur 15mins older]: dont forget i have access to all your baby photos Lily [ur 15mins older]: AND all the photos Fred sends in the group chat

James [the older twin]: look, i just came out to have a good time James [the older twin]: and honestly im feeling very attacked rn James [the older twin]: also @Fred [the smart dumb one] are you not gonna say anything??

Fred [the smart dumb one]: lol yeah, fuck you james <3

[survivor-tierradelfuego]

Ep. 10: “Not all hero’s wear capes, some wear pajama pants and robes!” - Cody

Amy A

Everything worked out PERFECTLY. Ugh I love a good plan. Hopefully my new core 4 plus Najwah stays in power. 

Olivia A

WHAT THE HELL!! Grae was my closest ally this is so disappointing. On top of everything, Aimee didn’t even vote with us!! So we’re at a 6-4 disadvantage. I don’t think anyone wants to work with us. Our last hope is finding and buying the idols and utilizing Kalle’s fake idol. I hate this.

Pedro A

woke up on the bottom...and thinking i was going home...guess what...im still here ahahahhahahahahahahhhaahhah...yall though...kalle is my guardian angel ...like if it wasnt for that girlll i would be out

ben kessler

Wednesday, July 29th, immediately after the tribal grae got voted out: heheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheh

Aimee

I had a long day and now Grae is gone. I’m honestly crying. Jay asked if I was okay and the river of tears just started flowing. I only knew Grae for a short while and really wanted to get to know them more. They brought such a beautiful, fun and loving energy to this game. Grae, I really am going to miss you. I’m just gonna go hug a stuff animal. 

Maddison

I knew Pedro was going to play an idol. He didn’t do one single puzzle, it’s obvious he felt safe. Snakes are slithering. 

Kalle N.

I truly cannot believe that our plan worked but it did and my splitting headache is totally worth it. I really feel like I deserve an Emmy or an Oscar for my performance with Maddison and Olivia after tribal but it's fine. I have absolutely no idea what comes next but boi will it be messy. I'm so sorry it had to be Grae but I didn't know what else to do. Also I hate that I'm working with Ben but don't worry I will use my chaotic energy to go against him eventually. I will now be erasing myself from the narrative and taking a break for several hours. Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.

Najwah

OK last night's tribal was wiiiiiiild af. I think the funniest part is that this all started with me planting a seed. I told Amy L that she is at the bottom of their alliance and that I was open to working with her to get Maddison out. She spilled all the tea about Maddison having two idols and that she's been wanting to gether out for a while bc she says the same thing to everyone lmao. I think the thing that pissed Amy off is that she told her "I feel closest to you" anyway, Amy didn't respond to me immediately so I thought she wasn't on board at first so I told Cody I'd work with him and that I have the idol from Alan. Ffs. Wrong move. Cody just trust other people wit information and it's really annoying. While I love Sarah, I can't really trust her bc she's really close to Ben and Aimee - who I do not trust. Well, Aimee I am not sure about. I guess I only don't trust her because of her close Ness to Ben and Ben blatantly lies. Anyway. So Amy told me that their alliance is still trying to vote Pedro which is perfect for us coz we can still stay Hanúha strong. So at this point I realise I wouldn't have to play my super idol and Cody wouldn't have to play his extra vote. Anyway. Amy tells Kalle about the plan to get Maddison out. I send Amy a long ass message Pedro sent Zack that Zack sent me. She tells her group that Zack had sent it to her, to solidify their vote for Pedro. And then She, Kalle, Ben and Pedro form an alliance and they pull off one of the most epic blindsided. I mean, wow. Amy told me beforehand so I saw it coming and I told Cody about it too. Lmao but Ccody just can't be low key he wrote something about Maddison's two idols and he asked in the Old Hanúha group whether anyone had known about the plan lmao obviously Ben was like "no" and wtf. Ben's facial expressions at tribal was hilarious especially because I know he careful conducted this whole genius plan. I mean people still think their alliances are with their alliances and that no one has moles but there are so many layers right now and there are a few moles. 

Cody just needs to shut up. Be like Ben who claims that everything he is doing is for James lmao but is in a secret alliance with the person that got James out lmao love it. I love that I can see through some of the BS right now. The only person that could fuck up my game is Cody atm but I am taking a leap of faith and trusting him. He needs to trust me too. I kept telling him to just trust the process last night and he kept freaking out. I think the realisation of Ben being a BSer got to him a bit. Also, he toldd Sarah that I spoke to Amy? Like I'm so fkn mad. Can he just shut up? Ugh that's my biggest problem right now. I LOVE CODY OMG WE SPEAK ON VIDEO CALL LIKE EVERY HOUR LMAO but I'm just scared that he is too trusting with certain people, especially at this point in the game. He also doesn't know how to be low key lmao which is kinda funny. Also, Pedro. Wev ebeen talking a lot. Pedro's friggin Greek they're speech and the vote with Grae that ended with "sorry not sorry" just. Lmao. I wish I watched this on TV. I'm sad that it happened via skype😂😂 also I am not sure how this VL confession thing works. Did I say the right things? Yall probably have all the tea already. I'm a little sad that Grae went home. She seemed genuinely nice but she was our only option because Olivia won immunity. Maddison also made us all uncomfortable coz she took the time to chat to none of the new people at merge. Like? Olivia and Grae made the effort. She just seems too safe. Too comfortable. She isn't even participating in this challenge. Is she THAT comfortable or just pissed? Who knows? Never keep to yourself like that. It makes people suspicious. Pedro does seem very smart and manipulative though and I will be weary of him. Let's go idol hunting then woohoo. 

Najwah

Also I keep laughing at how ridiculously bad I am at answering questions at tribal. Omg. Embarrassing. I need like a few minutes to THINK. I always look back, and wonder why tf I said what I said. In retrospect, I'd answer last night's question with "don't we all feel like we are on the outs?" ugh. I'm so bad at it. I realise it makes me look dumb and perhaps that's not a bad thing. I don't mind looking dumb tbh. Lmao. 

Cody A.

I haven’t done one of these written confessions in a while! Obviously things have been absolutely fish crazy. Idek what fish crazy means but it just came to me. And on the topic of fish... I’m pretty positive I called Maola a bunch of sharks at tribal council. 

If it wasn’t for Naj last night, I would have been completely blonde sided by the vote. I had no idea what was going on, I thought the plan was to put votes on Pedro and Madison and one of them would go. 

About 20 minutes before tribal naj called me and said she did not want me to feel left out of the events that were about to occur. She told me the real plan of Pedro and Madison both playing idols and Pedro casting the sole vote on Grae. Not going to lie I was scared shitless... I was so close to writing kalles name as a safety net for myself. What if Pedro would’ve cast the sole vote against me? At the very least it would’ve been a 1-1 tie between myself and kalle. I just didn’t want to be Denise’d out of this game. 

Ultimately I trusted my gut which told me to just trust naj. If I had got fucked over last night, at least I would’ve went out trusting the right people. Naj also told me about a 4 person alliance between Amy, Pedro, Kalle, and BEN... My Ben!!! Smh. So moving forward I have to be very careful with the information I give and receive from Ben which sucks because I thought I could trust him more :/ Basically THANK THE LORDT FOR NAJ. Not all hero’s wear capes, some wear pajama pants and robes! 

Kalle N.

So this entire time that I've worked with Ben, he always dictates our moves and every single thing I can or can't say to certain people. If I suggest something he immediately turns it down and will only do what he wants. Men are the worst. Anyways, a little bit ago after he told me what our next move is and didn't let me have any input, he suddenly said "Actually what do you want to do? You go ahead and tell me what you want". That is EXTREMELY sus and makes me think that he's just trying to make me feel better while he's secretly plotting against me. I could go along with it and just let him vote me out bc honestly I'm exhausted, or I could reveal all of the insanity that happened in the last vote to my other alliance and then expose him to his own tribe for working with me. Which would get him voted out. But that's a lot of work so I'm ngl I'm leaning towards just getting voted out myself

Aimee

I’m so glad I’m not actually on an island playing real life Survivor right now. I would constantly be in the ocean or somewhere in the bushes bawling my eyes out. And then coming back to camp like, “oh hey guys! No puffy face here, I promise! Yeah everything is peaches! Hanuha strong! Those red eyes are just from too much sun, I think I need to lay down in the shade” I’m not crying over Grae and how shitty I was to Maddison or anything, JayKay I totally am! I hate that I didn’t tell Maddison the votes were going her way. I’m not even sure why I didn’t. I’m so sorry Maddison, I really hope we can rebuild our connection and work together again. I just feel like barf and am exhausted. Trying to play this game with a full time job is tough. I hope I have the emotional fortitude to pick myself back up and put on a poker face. The last thing I need is anyone figuring out my tells and knowing what I am up to. I want to work with Ben and Maddison the most at this point. I hope I can make that work out. 

Pedro A

I'm honestly scared...for the next tribal ...I feel like everyone is gonna go after me...cause apparently I'm the villan lol

Kalle N.

It's a little hard to focus on the game at the current moment bc an exciting/terrifying development may be occurring in my life in the next couple of days. I'm having a prolonged anxiety attack. We were going to try to take out Aimee so F's in the chat to pay respect. Don't know what I'll be doing. Need to go cry in the shower now.

Najwah

Sigh. It's been a very long day. I really played hard at this challenge, knowing I have a 15% DA. Do I think it's insane that someone came into the game when half the players had already been eliminated and over half the 24 hours had already passed only to NOT even try to eliminate the one person not in our alliance in there, then pretend it's all kumbaya and eliminate our alliance (who we said we won't eliminate, we made a pact?) one by one? I mean yeah it's damn insane. And not that I'm a sore loser or anything, but I wish she'd have been there when things were actually heated and when everyone else was putting in the hard work. This isn't endurance in my opinion. This is coming into a game late and reaping all the benefits. However, well done on her tactic. Love it honestly. I think she made good moves and knew when to strike and for that, of course I think she's a fkn Queen. Even though I felt as though I was so close to winning immunity, even though I tried really hard. At the end of the day, it's how you outwit and outlast your opponents. Next time I'll be sure to not read challenge rules at 4am and then try to actually understand the game properly and how I too, can make things easier for myself dammit coz I think i keep making everything so hard for myself in this game ugh. I just need one fucking WIN. Goodness I am playing so hard. Wow. Wow. Starting to wonder what panderosa is like lol must be fun. Anyway I need to sleep coz the sleep deprivation is making me feel sick af and making me paranoid about having corona. 

Aimee

https://lovelyygifss.tumblr.com/post/618070044309700608/deserved-more-than-0-votesssss QUEEN SARAH!!!!!!! 👑 ♥️ This challenge proved to me so much that Sarah is in it for the long haul with me! I could tell she was never guessing for my word and I wasn’t trying hers. Team Casanova is once again coming up equal on all challenges and I love to see it! I can’t believe I got to have my Michele moment and come from behind after being hours behind in the challenge and eliminating the last three people in a row to kick down that damn puzzle! I am on such an adrenaline rush!!! After the low lows of last night this rollercoaster of game really proves you can get right back up and thrive! Haha it was so hard saying my word since I’m a pretty positive person and my word was “not.” Sarah and I never gave up in this challenge and we ended up being the last two remaining!!! I also really bonded with Najwah and Cody. That challenge was so much more than immunity it was also a great opportunity to bond with cast mates and I really capitalized on that. Even during this challenge I patched things up with Maddison too and it seems like we are back to trying to make things work with us. I feel like Grae would want that for both of us too. I went from crying my eyes out the night before to total redemption today. It was on my bucketlist to win an individual immunity and I did it on something I never knew I could win. I’m just so amped and trying to calm myself down. I’m just https://youtu.be/erG5rgNYSd Wheeler island in the sun The song I was listening to when I won immunity. 🎃🐻🌈🍑❤️💜🧡💛

Sarah

There have been so many things that have happened today... This morning Ben, Naj, and I gave Cody enough coins for him to hopefully get the idol. Cody showed me what was in the store and how there were two necklaces for $20 which was odd. He got one of the necklaces and we thought it was a real idol. Tbh we still don’t know if it’s a real idol. Cody sent a fake message to Ben and I showing that it was a “fake idol” (he got the message from Naj when she had found a fake idol). We thought it was real but when Cody found it it said “what seems to be an idol,” which makes me think someone planted a fake idol there and he did get a fake idol. I will send in more soon... 

Najwah

I thought that making it to merge would be enough for me lol but somehow my goal is just to get further now. I'm at a crossroads though bc there is no one I really want to get out or back stab or whatever. Cody found a supposed idol yesterday. I told him just to tell Ben it's a fake idol and if Ben wanted to use the fake idol, he could give him my idol. Thing is, Cody is paranoid about it being a real idol or fake one that he found. I think he should just chill about it and it'll be fine. I just want Cody to be calm, I feel like without Zack's constant talking and scheming, the silence is getting to him a bit. But I quite like the silence. He thinks it means something is happening or people are plotting against him. I just think it means people are trying to sleep lol. I mean even if he was a target, he still has an idol. Ugh. Anyway it's actually a religious holiday for me today and tomorrow. So I will spend time with my husband and perhaps go to a fancy restaurant or something. I haven't felt fancy in so long and I realised everyone in this game has really seen gross, messy haired, late night Najwah lmao like I usually don't even let my friends see me this way 

Najwah

It's silly trying to keep wondering who tf I can trust. I need to just go with my gut. There are a few people in the game I really like. Cody, Sarah, Amy, Pedro and Aimee. I don't know the rest and I don't trust Ben. I don't know what he's up to. He was supposed to be in some secret alliance with Kalle and Amy but he told Cody and I about them so what's really happening? Who knows? Also he keeps asking me what do I want to do who do I want out? Lmaoooooooooo. 

Najwah

We had a lot of deep, crazy conversations yesterday and one of my favs were actually drooling over survivor players and realising how gay everyone is lmao. I love that. As someone who has struggled with my sexuality for most of my life, thinking I'm gay for a long time and then finding myself attracted to boys too was bizarre in the early 2000s. and being told being bisexual is a "phase" or "confusion" or that it was bc I went to an all girls school (shout out to Rhenish girls High), being in a space where everyone is really open and accepting of all this is amazing. I'm happy i live in a country where gay marriages have been legal since 2006 and ironically being trans or gay is not that big of a deal here as it is in countries way more progressive than ours. I still struggle with non binary pronouns but I am learning thanks to this game. I feel free just being who I am, whoever tf that is in this game. And for that I'm obviously very thankful. Today, I'm married to a man who appreciates my sexuality and is open to me exploring it even more. Its been a long journey and it makes me extremely happy seeing people in this game, so much younger than me and so much more sure of themselves. I'm happy that they will be spared a lot of pain and confusion. I love GenZ. I love that they just are who they are and there is no pretense. This Is so important and a luxury previous generations could only dream. Of. 

Sarah

From two nights ago.... https://youtu.be/uebz8rVKNbg https://youtu.be/xQyiuiGeEpo

Olivia A

Our plan for this vote feels really ambitious but I think it’s gonna work. We’ll likely get the numbers back :)

Maddison

I’m going to have to use my advantage tonight to save my ass. Guess that’s what advantages are for, eh?

Ben Kessler

I am trying to vote kalle out. If it works, my name will be out there but it may pay off. Maddison and Olivia are definitely going for me which is fine. I need to tell Pedro 5 minutes before tribal to trust me.

Kalle N.

Maddison will use her advantage, Olivia will play my idol, the only votes that will count will be the votes we put on Cody. That's it that's the plan

Cody A.

https://youtu.be/PuZChTTJzzU

Pedro A

Okay so me olivia kalle and amy are voting cody...plus maddison will leave tribal......and olivia will play the idol kalle has....i swear if olivia votes for me...and i go HOMEEE....IM DONEE...i have a bad feeling about this tribal...im trusting the devil lol 

Olivia A

Kalle has been playing double agent this whole time and told everyone about the safety without power advantage grrr what a mess 

Maddison

I’m making a big move tonight and I’m not sure yet how it will pan out. 

Olivia A

Kalle has been playing double agent this whole time and told everyone about the safety without power advantage grrr what a mess 

Olivia A

Initially we were going to all (Maddison, Cody, Najwah, Sarah, Aimee, and I) vote Ben but we are going to switch it to Kalle because Aimee and Ben are kinda close and we want to keep Aimee as a number. I’m happy to see Kalle go after how much she has lied to Maddison and me.

Olivia A

I am SO nervous for this vote. Here is the whole plan: Maddison will play her safety without power advantage and I will play the (fake) idol that Kalle gave me. This is just so that Kalle doesn’t get tipped off that we know about her lies. Kalle believes Maddison, Amy, and I are voting for Cody and think that she is voting for him as well. In reality, Cody, Aimee, Sarah, Najwah, Amy, and I are voting for Ben. We suspect Ben, Kalle, and maybe Pedro are voting for me and expect it to work because of the fake idol that Kalle planted. I really hope this works because if people are lying then I’m definitely going home. 

Ben Kessler

Dearest confessional, My life is out on the line. I am in a very vulnerable position right now and if I stay in the game tonight damage control must be done. There are many complicated plans and I work best under chaos, so these votes are hopefully good for my game overall. If kalle actually gives her idol to Olivia and we vote out kalle, maddison and Olivia and Amy will be pissed, but they do not have the numbers. I would need to do some more work to make sure I get the info that kalle is currently giving me, but it's not as bad as going farther with kalle and then losing later on. I now need to video call kalle goodbye.

[ofstaffs]

rey: rey will be like 'ah..... so UR the one my best friend is fucking but like not right'

steve: or peggy

rey: rey will be like 'wait is that a mirror nope ur a different person ok hi'

steve: u know vision could pick up the mjolnir so why cant rey

steve: she got the force

rey: REY SHOULD DO IT WITH EASE AND STEEB AND TORE WOULD JUS T BE THERE LIKE '........wut'

rey: and then shes like 'hAH tricks on u ive got the force, bitches'

steve: can rey and ben join the avengers thx

rey: rey would ruin all the undercover stuff

steve: GUYS http://www.cinemablend.com/new/An-Avenge...

rey: she cant work the sweatshirt, sunglasses, and hat

rey: bYE

thor: the instant steve announced the challenge, thor tore his way through the ballpit and lunged after him, mere seconds behind. the very first tunnel proved to be a challenge in and of itself, however. huffing out a frustrated breath, thor awkwardly half-shimmied, half-crawled through. "these tunnels weren't made for asgardians, that much is clear." by the time he finally made it through the other side of his fifth tunnel, his chest was heaving with exertion and the sides of his arms were bright red from squeezing through the tunnel walls. "i surrender," he called out grudgingly. without warning, he collapsed onto his back in the middle of the tunnel, thankful that this one was at least made up of some type of rope rather than the hard plastic of the others.

thor: rip thor

thor: CROSSO VE R OH MY GKSL

steve: rey drag him with ur jakku junk dragger™

thor: LOL nah she can just climb over his corpse it's ok

steve: I WAS TRYING TO FIND A PIC OF THE JUNK DRAGGER AND I FOUND THIS http://media1.popsugar-assets.com/files/...

rey: rey immediately got into competitive mode as soon as steve brought up the challenge. within moments, she was crawling through the holes and squeezing past crevices with ease. scavenging in small areas helped with that, along with her tiny body. unfortunately, an irregular diet helped with /that/. but finally she slipped through the last tunnel and came out victoriously, holding her arms up. "i win!" she grinned happily. then she laughed as she saw that thor was stuck, and moved quickly to him, placing her hands on her hips. "maybe if you weren't so strong, this wouldn't be happening," she teased.

steve: LIKE OMF

rey: no shell just go cuddle him

steve: IT LOOKS SO REAL

rey: WTF I THOUGHT THAT WAS REAL AT FIRST

thor: OH DANG WTF

thor: IT DOES LOOK REAL

steve: steve took a seat in the cube area that connected two tunnels, letting rey pass him up. even for a super soldier it was really hard. he got a glimpse of thor laying in the center of a rope tunnel. as soon as rey announced her victory, steve found a slide by the next tunnel up. he even slid down it defeatedly. "i'm too old for this." the avenger mumbled as he got to the bottom of the slide, which ended a few feet from rey. if laser tag included narrow passages, then he would be on his way to the area where the parents sat earlier.

steve: cap is #done

steve: i love how thor and steve can beat the fuck out of huge robots and space dragons but fail at playgrounds

rey: LOL I LOVE THEM

rey: ok i think kayla passed out and im about to too rip

rey: well def continue tomorrow tho omg

steve: same

steve: night!!

rey: night fam

steve joined the chat 21 hours ago

thor was timed out 19 hours ago

thor joined the chat 15 hours ago

thor left the chat 14 hours ago

steve joined the chat 12 hours ago

steve: im lowkey here

rey was timed out 9 hours ago

rey joined the chat 8 hours ago

rey: I'm low key here now omg

rey: i should be around for a little while

steve joined the chat 8 hours ago

steve joined the chat 8 hours ago

steve joined the chat 8 hours ago

steve: hello!!

rey: HELLO

steve joined the chat 7 hours ago

rey: HI

thor joined the chat 6 hours ago

thor: I PASSED OUT LAST NIGHT RIP ME

thor: thankfully, thor recovered swiftly. he had no intention of navigating his way through the godforsaken tunnels to get out, however. "my strength is not the problem," he informed rey, eyes glinting as he realized exactly how he could escape this monstrosity. rolling over onto his stomach, he grabbed hold of the ropes directly below him and forcefully pulled them apart. they surrendered easily to his strength, the tunnel giving out underneath him in a matter of seconds. landing in a crouch, he shot rey a grin. "see? these fragile midgardian materials cannot hold the mighty thor."

thor: thor has no chill tbh

steve: im dying

thor: don't die omg what will america do without u???

thor: RAI WHERE R U

thor was timed out 3 hours ago

thor joined the chat 3 hours ago

thor joined the chat 2 hours ago

rey: IM SO SORRY I WAS AT A GAME RIP

rey: IM MOBILE FOR A BIT

thor: IT'S OK OMG DID U HAVE FUN

rey: YAS SO MUCH

thor joined the chat 2 hours ago

thor: WAIT WHAT KIND OF GAME WAS IT

rey rey giggled in admiration as she watched thor literally rip the ropes apart, and land in a crouching position. then she met up with steve and shook her head. "no..." she complained dejectedly, reaching her hands out to him. "we-we still have the trampolines. and-and laser tag!" she grinned, hoping to get his spirits up.

rey: I MANAGE FOR BOYS VOLLEYBALL AT MY SCHOOL

thor: OMG REALLY?? THATS SO COOL

rey: YA ITS FUN

thor: i suggest a rey/thor laser tag team-up against steve

thor joined the chat 109 minutes ago

rey: YES PLS

rey joined the chat 93 minutes ago

rey: iM HERE ON A COMPUTER BLESS UP

thor joined the chat 90 minutes ago

thor: NICE 2 bad steeb's missing :////

rey: fml ik

rey: i messaged mia tho

thor: gosh does she have a life or something?? RUDE

rey: yA WTF IS UP WITH THAT

rey: IM GETTING TO THE MEME U SENT ME NOW RIP

thor joined the chat 87 minutes ago

thor: OMG OK BUT DONT KILL ME WITH CUTENESS AGAIN THANKS

rey: NO PROMISES THO

thor: OH GR8

rey: brb dinner ayy

steve: HEY BITCHES

thor: aYYYYY IT'S STEEB THE DWEEB

steve: steve hoisted himself up from the slide, joining rey and a crouching thor. he had no idea what a laser tag was or why they'd let children play it, but he proceeded to agree anyway. the laser tag facility was unlike anything he had ever seen. the room was pitch black, aside from the various neon obstacles and graffiti on the walls. there were staircases leading to ramps above the floor. there were guns, presumably 'lasers', lining the wall next to the entrance. steve grabbed a laser, before tossing two to rey and thor.

steve

http://youtube.com/watch?v=8pmB7nlC9mI

i watched this shit

thor: omfg i admire ur devotion sm

thor: thor caught the weapon effortlessly, though he held it slightly away from himself in wary consideration. it appeared to be of the same style as most other midgardian weapons, yet they were used for games? reminding himself that steve was the one handing them over – so it couldn't be /that/ harmful – he wrapped his hands more securely around the gun in preparation for battle. leaning close to rey, he murmured, "join forces with me?"

thor: rip steve

steve: https://49.media.tumblr.com/e0a9dce6eefe...

thor: LMFAO

thor: get out ben, this ain't ur battle

steve: if ben found out this was happening he would be like http://66.media.tumblr.com/a95daaf244c20...

thor: LOL BEN OMG CALM DOWN

rey: IM HERE

rey: IM H ER EE

rey: FCK

thor: FIN ALLY

rey: HUSH

thor: NO

steve: HI

rey rey followed steve up the stairs, making sure thor was there behind her, then giggled excitedly at the pitch black play area. she carefully caught the laser gun he tossed her, grunting slightly at the force, then looked up as thor leaned down beside her. she giggled silently, hand going over her mouth, and nodded her head swiftly. "let's do it," she whispered back, then winked and moved to steve. "okay, let's spread out first. i'll start our guns with the panel on the wall. then we go. agreed?"

rey: HI BABE

steve: steve caught a glimpse of the two whispering out of the corner of his eye. he was too busy trying to scope out the area to realize what was going on. "okay." cap spoke as he zeroed in on the perfect spot. as soon as their guns were activated, the avenger was bolting up the stairs to the first hanger. the ramp was dark so soon enough he lost sight of the two. he kept his gun on the rail in true assassin fashion, ready to shoot at the friends.

steve: steve learned his moves from bucky ))

steve: wtF IS THAT THING

rey: thE EMOJI OMF

rey:

thor: tHE EMOJIS LMAO

steve: steve, finding out his friends are t8rs:

steve: tr8s***

rey: t8r tots

thor: "agreed." thor slid his finger over the trigger, readying himself. it didn't surprise him when steve was the first to take off as soon as rey gave the signal. considering his history as a soldier, thor had opted to take on an ally against him for that very reason. with one last nod at rey, he began navigating his way after steve as quietly as a man of his build could manage. it was much too dark, however, and thor soon found himself using one of the several odd glowing pillars for cover as his gaze scanned the area for signs of movement.

thor: T8R TOTS

thor: delish

rey "okay, ready? go!" rey shouted to them once they were all dispersed, using the force to start up the panel that gave their guns power. she began running along, mainly for cover at first, and ducked expertly behind walls using her stealthy silence. soon, she saw steve on the second floor and grinned to herself, running up the back stairs. she stayed ducked behind a wall, but stuck her gun out just enough to zero in on her target, and shoot rapidly at him, the sound effects going off.

rey: LOL

thor: GET HIM REY GET HIM

rey: if ben and rey ever played laser tag, shed get v emotional bc she tried to go after him with a gun on takodana rip

thor: sudden feels

steve: steve caught a glimpse of someone shuffling behind a pillar below. his finger snuck down to the trigger, slowly but surely ready to shoot the target. alas, his grand moment was ruined when laser beams sounded off behind him. he expected thor to be the one behind the shots, but he was faced with rey crouching behind a wall below. "rey, you traitor!" the super soldier exclaimed, surprisingly offended by her actions. he took off down the stairs determined to take her down.

rey: feel trip

steve: pft ben wouldn't go into the laser tag room, the darkness is too ~tempting~

rey: 'Does Rey call you Daddy ' riP

rey: the darkness works with his aesthetic tho

steve: wtF

rey: YEP U GOT US SHE SO DOES

steve: i don gettit

thor: the commotion from nearby, quickly followed by steve's shout, brought a grin to thor's face. remaining in place, he cocked his head and listened closely for the careless series of telltale stomps down the stairs as steve searched for his victim. alas, thor fully intended to protect his ally. as soon as he heard the other man moving passed his pillar, thor lunged out from behind it, sound effects deafening the quiet as he unloaded a series of shots directly at steve. "hide, rey!"

thor: oMG i saw that ask & i screamed

rey rey couldn't stop laughing as she ran as fast as she could away from steve, tripping over her own feet every now and then, though she allowed herself a break as she heard thor's gun go off, meaning he found steve. now was her chance. she ran up the stairs steve had been on earlier and crouched behind a wall again, then fired her gun... at thor. she fired shot after shot, right when he least expected it, then turned her gun on steve as well, continuing to laugh as she nailed them both. "sorry, i had to trick ya!"

steve: the confusion on his face was absolutely priceless as rey shot at them both. he was unbelievably aggrieved that the two had teamed up against him, but then this? steve didn't spare the laughing girl a look before lifting his laser and shooting it at her. "number one rule of war, skywalker: never get distracted on the battlefield."

steve

http://youtube.com/watch?v=-i99TPwXSoM

steve rn

rey: HAHAHAHAHAH

rey: OMFG

thor: his own ally had turned on him. when steve turned his own weapon on her in return, thor used it as cover, swiftly moving to circle around rey. it would have been a prime opportunity to shoot her again, but she deserved far worse than that. throwing an arm around her waist, he lifted her off her feet and draped her over his shoulder. "no more fun," he announced in a cheerful tone as he casually made his way back to the captain. "rogers, how do you punish traitors on this planet?"

rey "hey!" rey gasped as steve shot her, moving to run away again, then shrieked and laughed hard as thor picked her up and laid her across his shoulder, kicking her feet playfully. her gun slipped out of her hands in the midst of all the fighting, and she was laughing even harder as they approached steve, crossing her arms stubbornly. "not fair!"

rey: i shouldve had her say 'spank me, daddy'

steve: NO

thor: oMF G

rey: o ya

thor joined the chat 20 hours ago

thor: http://images.idakoos.com/B0220000BL0000...

rey: oh my og od

rey: oh my og od

steve: "well, it usually goes something like.." steve pretended to stroke his chin in thought, before deciding on a torture method. "tickling. lots of it. it worked on the nazis every time." the captain joked lightly, letting his gun clatter to the floor beside him. "tickling on a trampoline seems pretty brutal to me."

steve: pcE

steve: https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236...

rey: nO RAI IS SO TICKLISH SHE WILL START CRYING

rey: stop

rey: SOTP*

steve: can u imagine derek walking in one two burly blonde dudes tickling tf out of his gf

rey: ON A TRAMPOLINE

steve: can u imagine thor and cap on a trampoline like girl

rey: yum

rey: ive gotta go yeet to the shower after i do this next reply

thor: "tickling it is." tossing his weapon onto the floor as well, thor then turned on his heel and began making his way for wherever the 'trampolines' were. eventually, he managed to find them – and stepped onto the closest one without even hesitating. instantly the unstable, bouncy terrain threw him off-balance, and his grasp on rey loosened as he fell onto his back. as soon as his head stopped spinning, he spoke dryly, "/this/ is supposed to be fun?"

thor: prepare 4 me 2 randomly pass out again as soon as u shower xoxo

rey: omg ill try 2 hurry rip

rey "no, no, no!" rey protested and shook her head swiftly, knowing how ticklish she was, and laughed again as thor carried her to the trampolines, though she gasped as well as he fell, allowing her to break free from his hold. "yeah, it's so much fun! look!" she giggled and began jumping up and down, reaching her hands out to steve.

thor: if u guys would just move to the superior east coast this wouldn't be a probLEM

rey: OK BRB

steve: ive never been to the east coast i am down

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rey: I AM BACK

rey: WAS THAT FAST ENOUGH

rey: OR NO

rey: WHERE DID U ALL GO

rey: WHAT

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steve: im heeree

rey: friEND

rey: I LEFT FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES DID THIS PLACE DIE OR SMTH

steve: steve's left angle gave out beneath him on the canvas of the trampoline. he stumbled a bit before finding his footing. as soon as rey approached him, he reached his hands out to attack her ribs. he began to tickle her, seizing her jumping movements

steve: idK YOU LEFT AND THEN KAYLA LEFT SO I WAS LIKE OK PCE

rey: i tolD U WEHRE I WAS GO ING

steve: MAYBE SHE FELL ASLEEP IDK

rey: GDI

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thor: I FELL ASLEEP AGAIN IM S ORRY

rey: LAAAAME

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rey: ayyyy

thor: ayyy hello ur fav sleepaholic is here

rey: LOL

thor: upon carefully finding his footing (which proved immensely more difficult when rey was bouncing all over the place) thor stepped over to join the pair engaged in a one-sided tickle fight. bending his knees a couple of times in a test bounce, he glanced down at rey with undeniable smugness. "i would help you, but this is your rightful fate after betraying me." and if asgardians were good at anything, it was holding grudges.

thor: i love how we're all rarely on at the same time lmao

rey: thats so tru

thor: REY MEETING LOKI THO

rey "no!" rey shrieked as steve began tickling her, causing her to completely lose her footing. his hands were the only things holding her up now, and she was laughing so hard it was almost silent. and thor wasn't helping. time to pull the guilt card. "ow, steve. /ow/," she winced, hand going to her ribs, where he had bruised her from hugging her too hard. "it hurts, stop..."

rey: rey u bitch

rey: I K NOW

rey: WE PLOTTED SOME THINGS MWAHAHAH

thor: YOU WHAT OMG IM AFRAID

rey: BE AFRAID

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steve: WAS GOOD

steve: steve withdrawled his hands with a mortified look on his face. how could he forget? that bruise was bound to be there, and worse than it was before. "i'm so sorry," the avenger gushed. his apology was a little humorous due to the way he swayed back and forth on the trampoline.

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thor: hOW DO WE ALWAYS MISS EACH OTHER WTF

thor: thor's earlier amusement quickly turned into a whirlwind of confusion and concern. while steve withdrew, the asgardian lowered himself to a crouch beside rey, his hand tentatively enveloping her shoulder. "what happened?" his eyes scanned the girl for injuries before snapping to his fellow avenger accusingly. "did his tickles harm you?"

steve: im here

thor: SUP

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rey: riP

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rey: IM SRY

rey rey bit the inside of her cheek to keep from laughing. the bruise was already almost gone, and she wasn't hurt at all. she just liked to mess with her boys. as thor asked his question, the smile finally spread across her cheeks as she shook her head, easily rising to her feet and bouncing up and down a bit. "actually, i'm feeling a lot better," she giggled and winked before bouncing away as she laughed even harder, knowing they'd want to get their revenge. "gotcha!"

thor: thor picked himself up off the ground, reaching up and patting the back of his head in the process. the bun still held. huh. it really did hold better thanks to rey's superior method. "if anyone attempts to arrest us, i'll stop them," he replied with confidence. narrowing his eyes in rey's direction, he added, "besides, i don't wish to ever come back here again. it will only remind me of betrayal."

rey at the mention of getting arrested again, rey's smile immediately disappeared as she stopped her bouncing, fidgeting with her fingers nervously. she felt slightly more relieved at thor's promise of keeping them out of jail, nodding her head. then she moved to thor and couldn't help but wrap her arms around him, still overall grateful that he would even think about stopping people from arresting them. she couldn't do that again. "thank you..." she whispered, then reached a hand out to steve.

thor: thor picked himself up off the ground, reaching up and patting the back of his head in the process. the bun still held. huh. it really did hold better thanks to rey's superior method. "if anyone attempts to arrest us, i'll stop them," he replied with confidence. narrowing his eyes in rey's direction, he added, "besides, i don't wish to ever come back here again. it will only remind me of betrayal."

rey at the mention of getting arrested again, rey's smile immediately disappeared as she stopped her bouncing, fidgeting with her fingers nervously. she felt slightly more relieved at thor's promise of keeping them out of jail, nodding her head. then she moved to thor and couldn't help but wrap her arms around him, still overall grateful that he would even think about stopping people from arresting them. she couldn't do that again. "thank you..." she whispered, then reached a hand out to steve.

steve: "don't worry about getting arrested." the captain shot a smile to rey. "rey has the force. she can get us out of everything." he spoke highly of the girl, grasping her palm in his.

thor: though thor was supposed to be annoyed with her, he couldn't help but soften as her small arms wrapped around him. he enveloped her in one of his own in return, rubbing one of her shoulders. "the force?" he repeated, brows furrowing. "she is tiny. what force could she have?"

rey "...if snoke doesn't get in my way..." rey replied quietly in a pessimistic manner, glancing shyly up at steve. then she clasped onto his hand before looking up at thor, smiling softly. "the force surrounds us all. it controls... basically everything. watch," she whispered then turned to the ball pit, lifting her free hand up. but nothing was happening. "...no," she breathed out, shaking her head as she tried again and again to at least make one of the small, colored balls levitate. "no, no, no..." she could feel its absence in her mind, in her heart. with snoke so strong now, it was hard to keep in touch with it. "steve, i-i can't- it's gone..."

steve: snoke. he had heard that name before.. it was the sith lord who invaded rey's brain. the captain moved closer to her, bending down slightly to get a better look at her. "are you alright?" he pressed. at times like this, he wished wanda was here to help.

thor: if the force surrounded them all, thor had no idea how he'd never sensed it before. he watched, captivated, as rey seemed to be attempting to do something –– but failed. "what's gone? the force?" thor looked back and forth between steve and rey, faintly irritated over his lack of understanding. instinctively, his arm tightened around her shoulders, pulling her in closer. "we will help you find it."

rey rey looked into steve's eyes nervously as he ducked his head down to look at her, much like derek did when she was upset about something. "it-it doesn't hurt yet, but i can't... i can't focus on doing it," she whispered, wrapping her arms around thor again as he hugged her. then she nodded her head and stepped back as she took a deep breath, thinking about the hope that both steve and her new friend, thor, had for her. she closed her eyes and held her hand up again, focusing as hard as she could. when she opened her eyes, only one ball had popped out of the pit, and rolled a few inches on the ground, then stopped. she sighed heavily and buried her face in her hands, hoping she wasn't losing touch with the force for good.

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ur favorite grandpa joined the chat 2 days ago

ur favorite grandpa changed name to thor

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steve: steve smiled gently as the ball rolled forward. he knew it must have took a lot to persevere with snoke inside of her mind. "don't get upset." the avenger chastised the girl. "you just need to.. find the force again. is there anyone who can help you?" he knew that rey had multiple family members in magnolia. they had to be able to help her, someway or somehow. "could we help you?"

thor: a ball levitated in midair, seemingly doing so as a result of rey's concentration. thor barely heard steve as the man spoke, too busy gaping at the ball in newfound fascination. an amazed laugh escaped him. "did you move that with your mind?" he turned to face rey, eyes dancing with enthusiasm over what he had just witnessed. "is this the force? i did not realize you were capable of something so incredible." after a pause in which the solemn mood washed over him, he added, "if you could do that, then the force is still within you. you haven't lost it."

rey rey turned sheepishly towards the two again, nodding her head to steve. but then, noting thor's reaction, her own expression lightened slightly, her shoulders straightening. "r-really...?" she whispered, feeling more reassured by the way he was so interested in her force skills. "as-as long as snoke's here, i don't think i can get any better..." she mumbled to steve and stepped back. in fact, she could feel him coming now. she opened her mouth to explain it to them, but just turned and moved off the trampolines onto the floor, rubbing her temples with her fingers.

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steve: "don't say that." steve called after rey as jumped off the trampoline. he looked at thor before following after her. surely this snoke guy could be stopped. they've dealt with aliens before, what made this one so different? "what can we do to help?"

steve joined the chat 43 hours ago

thor: the mention of snoke nearly drew a low growl from thor's throat. the idea of an unseen opponent harming someone like rey right beside him while he was powerless to do anything to stop it was beyond upsetting, to say the least. "there must be a way to track him," thor added as he trailed after steve, worried gaze on rey's back. "if i know where he is, i can put a stop to this. even if he has armies, they will not stop me."

rey rey buried her face in her hands now and sniffed, trying to push him out of her mind as much as possible. but it wasn't necessarily simple. at the first small pain, she winced and jumped slightly, hands dropping to her mouth. "no, no, no, no..." she murmured under her breath as she began to tremble, pleading for him to leave her mind. then there was another, sharper pain and rey tucked her knees to her chest, beginning to rock back and forth.

steve: steve dove to his knees as soon as rey fell. "hey, hey," he cooed, wrapping his arms around his shoulders. he knew whatever she was feeling or seeing was much like what they went through when wanda brainwashed them. if not worse. he felt a intense need to protect his best friend. "it's gonna be okay, rey. i love you. stay with us," he cooed, rubbing her back as his heart hammered in his chest.

thor: it appeared steve and rey were even closer than thor originally suspected. the revelation did little to ease the tension in his muscles as he began circling restlessly around the pair, hands curling into fists as he itched to summon his prized weapon and smash something, anything. "we must help her," he finally said, stopping to glare at steve. "there must be a way. think of something."

rey rey clasped her hands over her ears and began to cry as she buried her face in his chest, but managed to murmur, "i-i love y-you too..." through her sobs. just so he knew how appreciative she really was of his kind, caring heart. her hands moved about until they landed on thor's chest, curling her fingers into his shirt and holding it tightly, tugging him closer. another sharp pain caused her to shriek and weep even harder, tears flowing freely down her cheeks.

steve: "you're the one from space." steve gritted his teeth, trying to focus on the girl falling apart before him. she was in excruciating pain by the looks of it, and it killed him not being able to stop it. "rey, listen to me. is there anything we can do? what makes it hurt less?" the usual put together soldier was now stumbling over his words in an attempt to help his friend.

thor: thor allowed himself to be pulled closer, teeth grinding together as he fought to keep his rage against an invisible foe in check. his temper wouldn't help, especially not when the likes of even steve rogers was losing his cool. "i could take her to asgard," he said slowly. "our healers may lessen her pain while we search for answers." assuming everyone on asgard cooperated and sought to help her as much as he did.

rey "d-derek..." was the first thing rey choked out. he usually helped her after a snoke episode. by... doing exactly what steve and thor were doing now. holding her. talking to her. maybe things would be okay. she squeezed her eyes shut and tried to focus on clearing her mind, like anakin and ben taught her, attempting to push out all thoughts of anything dark. instead she focused on memories of derek. of ben, of steve, of thor, everyone. and slowly, gradually, she calmed down, eyes finally fluttering open. he was leaving. he was smart enough to pick his battles, rey was sure, and probably couldn't fight this one.

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steve: steve's jaw clenched at the mention of derek, but he quickly shook his rage off to focus on rey. her body noticeably let up moments later. he retracted his arms once he knew she was alright. "how often does this happen?"

thor: the unfamiliar name made thor frown, glancing at steve for answers – only to find an odd expression awaiting on the man's face for a split second. dislike? mentally tucking it away, he refocused on rey. where steve moved back, the asgardian leaned forward, slipping his arms beneath rey and lifting her effortlessly into his arms. steve already asked the question on his mind, so he remained quiet, merely looking down at her with expectance.

rey rey's arms slid easily around thor's neck, noticing how he didn't even flinch when lifting her small body. she really was curious to know how strong they both were. "it's-it's been happening more often than not lately..." she admitted in a whisper, rubbing at her eyes with her fists then returning her arms around thor's neck as she looked into steve's eyes. "i-i'm okay, though... please don't tell derek, i don't want him to worry. please."

steve: "do you know how to get to this snoke person?" his tone was firm and assertive, much like the one he reserved for the avengers. he ignored her question about derek and continued with the questions. "can your family help you at all?"

steve: "do you know how to get to this snoke person?" his tone was firm and assertive, much like the one he reserved for the avengers. he ignored her question about derek and continued with the questions. "can your family help you at all?"

thor: there was that name again. derek. thor's eyes narrowed in annoyance over not knowing yet another piece of information in the rapidly developing mystery of rey. at least the captain was back in action, a small silver lining. "if she knew where snoke was or if her family could help, i'd wager she would have already said as much by now." looking back and forth between the pair, he added, "who is this 'derek'?"

rey "/no/," rey snapped in frustration, mostly at herself for not being able to rid of the sith lord. "just-just forget it, he's gone now..." she mumbled, then closed her eyes again at the mention of derek. now she really missed him. she took a few deep breaths to keep the tears from filling her eyes, then rose to her feet shakily, one hand still in thor's, and the other in steve's. "i-i don't wanna dwell on snoke anymore... not tonight... please? i need a break...'

steve: "her boyfriend." steve answered curtly as rey let out her frustration. he couldn't understand how she could try to move on from something like that. his grip on her palm was loose. "what do you want to do?" he looked around, mentally checking off everything they had done. ball pit, check. playground, check. laser tag, check. trampoline, check. "i saw a game room near the front?"

thor: for a long moment, thor didn't move, only staring hard at the captain. if derek was rey's lover, why was steve so visibly displeased by the very mention of him? thor had only ever seen one reason for that type of behavior. as a fresh understanding dawned, thor wordlessly tightened his grasp of rey's hand and began leading her in the direction of the game room. when they arrived, he stepped passed several brightly colored loud machines until one in particular caught his eye. "captain america and the avengers?" he read aloud, amused in spite of himself.

rey "yeah, can we do that?" rey whispered as she took out her pigtails, trying to let the smile appear on her face again, though it was still shaky for now. she let go of steve's hand, knowing the reason behind his sudden closure, and instead held thor's with both of her own, stumbling along behind him. "whoa..." she whispered in amazement at all the machines, her eyes widening. once at the machine thor stopped it, she began giggling and moved to sit down on the floor in front of the game, knowing from experience to not be on her feet for too long after a snoke episode.

steve: "sounds about right." steve laughed under his breath, leaning against the side of the arcade game. he stared at the giant, cartoon version of himself for a few beats before moving around again. he wandered off toward a skeeball machine where he grabbed one of the basketballs. the avenger stood there, absentmindedly dribbling the basketball. the first time he shot, it went in effortlessly even though he hardly paying attention.

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thor: thor watched rey settle down onto the ground before glancing once more at the machine. uninterested in trying (and likely failing) to figure out how to toy with it, he shifted his attention to steve and the ease with which he tossed a ball through a hoop. "how long have you known each other?" he finally asked, looking back and forth between them. he could have asked more about derek, but keeping the peace felt like a better idea right then.

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rey: \

rey rey watched steve as he moved to go shoot a basketball, still staying where she hd sat on the ground. then she glanced up at thor and shrugged a shoulder. "i-i don't know... a month or so...? maybe longer?" she asked steve, smiling shyly to herself and resting her chin on her knees. "i used to have the biggest crush on him."

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steve: steve nearly choked on his tongue at rey's confession. instead of replying, he merely shot the basketball into the 100 point section. "you might not want to tell derek that." the soldier muttered as he collected the tickets that spewed out of the machine. he handed them over to rey, seeing that he had no use for them. "go get a prize."

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thor: "yes, go get your prize," thor agreed, pushing at rey with gentle but insistent nudges toward the area with several objects scattered along the wall that he assumed were prizes. as soon as she was out of earshot, he turned to steve, arms folding over his broad chest. "where i come from, we settle these situations with duels. have you considered fighting derek for her heart?" he kept his voice low, lips curving to betray his amusement. then, just like that, his features turned solemn. "if not, you must let go of her, friend. this pining is not easy to watch."

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rey rey looked up hesitantly as steve handed her the tickets, collecting them all into her arms and rising to her feet slowly. she didn't move immediately, but at thor's gentle persistence, she finally made her way to the counter, oblivious as to why they sent her away. she was too excited about her prizes. the worker there, the only one left, seemed less than thrilled about accepting the tickets, and told her to pick out three things. she looked over her shoulder at steve and thor, seeing them still talking, then glanced at the shelves to pick her prizes.

steve: steve scowled at thor's proposal. he wasn't entirely subtle about his dislike for derek, but he didn't think it was that obvious. "i'm not fighting derek." his gaze followed rey, who was eagerly awaiting her prizes. "i'll get over it. i always do." he shook his head, eyes falling down to his fidgeting fingers. it was a total lie. he wasn't even over peggy yet — and that was seventy years ago. he couldn't even close his eyes at night without thinking of her or bucky.

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thor: "no, you will not." thor knew an overly-attached lovestruck fool when he saw one. he himself had been on the opposite end of that sort of infatuation more than once, in fact. "these things do not simply fade away. they grow stronger, along with resentment, until you find yourself saying something you will regret." throwing rey a glance, he then dropped a hand on steve's shoulder, squeezing more tightly than truly necessary. "do not destroy your friendship with her. take some time away, if you must –– but let go of this before it harms both of you." thor released him and, without awaiting a response, strode over to join rey.

rey "thank you," rey gasped as the worker handed her her three items, hugging them close to her chest. then she turned towards her friends as thor made his way over to her, showing them the three bears she'd picked out. ( http://www.buildabear.com/ProductImages/... , http://www.buildabear.com/public/images/... , http://www.buildabear.com/ProductImages/... ) "aren't they so cute?" she giggled then moved to steve, wrapping her arms around him the best she could with her new toys. "thank you so much, steve."

steve: the crease between steve's brows tightened following his words. he knew thor was right, but the thought of distancing himself from the girl brought a sharp pain to his chest. he knew he would have to get over his schoolboy crush or else it'd cause damage. the soldier managed to muster a smile at rey as she approached. the stuffed animals tucked under her arm were cute, indeed. the cap and thor bears coaxed a laugh out of him. there was another one that strangely resembled darth vader. "you're welcome." his voice was distant, but the smile gracing his lips still remained. "where to now?"

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thor: thor cast a disapproving eye at rey as she embraced steve, but resigned himself to trusting that the captain would take his advice and move on. if not, thor would do his best to help pick up the pieces when things made a turn for the worse. "is this supposed to be me?" he took hold of his lookalike bear's paw, feeling the soft plushness of it. "hm. we should get ice cream." his eyes met rey's with a wink. in his experience, mortals loved their ice cream.

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rey rey grinned softly at steve's laugh, wishing he would do so more often, then looked between him and thor. "of course it is," she giggled, holding up the thor-themed teddy bear she'd chosen. then she gasped before nodding swiftly. "yes, yes, yes!" she begged, and didn't even wait for an answer before moving to the exit, but not before scooping up her captain america figurine that steve gave her, and holding it with her three teddy bears. "c'mon, you two are so slow!"

[ts-akhmim]

Episode 7 “It's a Hot Mess Express “ - Scott

People are so hard to work with. I get they don't like this challenge truly I do but I just wish they wouldn't keep shutting down every idea I had. It's... annoying. I get that I'm also the problem here. Because if an entire room full of people is saying you're wrong then you're probably wrong but still. I dislike being shut down. I've just been feeling kind of isolated since my name was written down. Even in my own alliance it seems like everyone thinks less of me for being paranoid. It doesn't help that I'm not entirely pop culture savvy so a lot of their convos I'm a bit out of the loop on. Part of me wonders if it's cause I'm in a male dominated environment? I don't think they are sexist but I do think that I'm being unintentionally ignored. Like throughout the duration of this confessional I have submitted 6 ideas/comments to the group and they've either been left in the dust or dismissed. That has to mean something right? Is it my personality? Did I come on too strong with my enthusiasm? Do they think I'm bossy? Socializing doesn't exactly come naturally to me. If anyone had met me 4 years ago you'd probably be in the know. You know that ability where you can pick up what people imply, whether through body language or through hidden meanings. I don't. I literally was born with out that ability and it has done whatever the opposite of wonders are for my life. At first I thought it was fine, I thought hey no big, everything is good, people like me eventually. But then I played Malaysia... A lot of great things came out of that game, a lot of good friendships and memories but in a way it sort of haunts me. When the confessionals came out, for the first time ever I saw what people thought about me. Sure they liked me eventually but they also disliked me. Like really really didn't like me at all. It was my first real interaction with people outside of the treatment school I went to, it was my first real interaction with the rest of the world and people hated my guts. Don't get me wrong I always suspected I was disliked but... to see their actual written thoughts on paper was hard. Of course as they got to know me they started to like me but I couldn't forget that it wasn't always like that. That at one point they looked at me or their screen or whatever and saw a pest. And that's my biggest fear, that I'm the problem. That no matter where I go people see me and are filled with dread or disgust. That people are always wishing me some from of ill because I'm bad at conversation or sort of creepy. Well at least they came to their own conclusions now, maybe they pulled their heads out of their asses or because it wasn't me they were actually able to function. God this spiraled, I only wanted to complain about how shitty my tribe was being not go on this full blown existential rant. Fuck me am I right? I'm not sure what this is going to contribute to the game. There is no hashtag big moves or fun comments but like I already typed this up so I'm not going to delete it like a pussy. 

Ok now we can talk whew. UMMMM not Connor fucking up Duncan's perfect record! Now that I'm over the shock, thank you Connor because I'm 95% sure that obsession is the reason Duncan did the most to make sure Devon voted me instead of him back on Thoth https://giphy.com/gifs/mamovie-stalking-octavia-spencer-eavesdropping-j5uEVYERR0ncYlJ36e Really pleased with how the game is shaping up tbh, assuming I don't lose another music video challenge hahaha. I would LOVE a final 3 with me, Ali, and Devon but I know that's a long way off so I'm just focusing on the here and now. My biggest concern is protecting Ali. Essentially Duncan hit me up to work with him, TJ, and Jordan and I was very much like lol not sure about that. Mainly because Jordan and I don't have a strong relationship? And Duncan was like yeah but he wants to get to know you better and I'm like https://giphy.com/gifs/week-wtf-moments-QjIz1AqkGTszK If that's the case, that needs to come from Jordan and then it's between me and Jordan. Why someone else is interceding on Jordan's behalf is very dicey to me but I'm not that surprised because that continues to be a theme with Duncan: getting me to fit into plans that best suit him. Y'all know DAMN well Jordan Pines don't wanna go to the end with me and the feeling is mutual. But I HAVE to make it work with Jordan or Duncan will get pissy. He literally was like ok well who are you close with and I felt a serious feeling in my gut to not mention Ali. So I said oh I talk to Adam a lot but I wouldn't say I trust Adam. So after telling Ali all of this lmao, we decided I needed to go back to Duncan and say yes because it would keep me in the know and keep both of us safe. Also it allows me to keep an eye on Jordan and Duncan at the same time so we truly stan. And the gag is I'm not scared of Jordan Pines and I welcome the challenge of getting him out so love yall for letting me in through the front door hahaha My new issue is just timing. We'll be ok if we win this next challenge but if not, I could see that alliance targeting Ali. Obviously I have a plan and will put the vote on someone else but I really want to prolong turning on that group for as long as I can. I don't wanna spook TJ and I know killing Jordan will leave me with a pissed Duncan and I really don't need that based on how seriously he's playing. So I'm hoping I can finesse somehow? Maybe one of them gets idoled out at merge and then a blindside on the other won't be as messy. But yeah I keep feeling like the walls are closing in, in terms of allies, and I'm working HARD to make sure I have an exit strategy at all times haha cause fuck these men I'm trying to win again. I "love everyone" which means I have no problem voting out anyone

So let me just make sure i got this right, connor tried to get people to vote for me, they all told me, he "planned" with me to go for liam, then....he votes for duncan and he goes home unanimously? little did he realize when he went around and gave a feeble attempt at rallying people to vote for me, i had already rallied everyone to go for him and made sure everyone knew he was a liar and couldnt be trusted, you know im a firm believer in loose lips sink ships and i absolutely used my big mouth as my weapon to sink his ship. Even if there turns out to be some majority alliance that did this all without me then well...i guess that's another story but im still taking my hard earned credit because either way i got what i wanted one way or another so im here for it, sorry gal! i now find myself in a position i hope i can make some moves with, duncan already just made a vague to comment to me about how "it only takes 4 now" which he's right, and he mentioned autumn, himself, me, and ali. Which, that's a 4 I would love to go forward with for the time being, i like to think ive had good genuine talks with them 3 in particular, and now we can start get together maybe lock something in and if we make it to a merge or even another swap we at least have something to work with with each other, but we'll see, we gotta focus on immunity first now, id love to win just to for sure see any of the other people who lied to me go home oop so while i may be feeling ok now i just have to remember to simmer down and play smart and make the right connections with the right people i need and saying the right things to whomever needs to hear it, because that's what i do best in these type of games to stay alive, i feel like my intuition has been leading me ok so far this game so im just gonna keep basing my decisions off that and charging forward PERIOD and ill damn sure do it with or without the help of the tomb because a bitch can not get in ive tried over and OVER at this point im back to pounding on the door of it just hoping if im annoying enough yall will let me in!

i'll do a proper game confessional later but me and dan are both judges for the svalbard music video challenge and its so sad that we cant talk... its like... this could be us working on a music video if things were different kjlsdfa its missing dan and jake hours

Whew! Sorry about that what happened was I ran out of anxiety meds a few days and that rant was the commutation of being with out sanity pills for three days! Everything is fine! I am fine! People are fine! I am sorry to the future Thoth 2.0 tribe, you are all great, I just get very spirally when I am without some sort of stabilizing force! Sorry to the hosts for using this as a diary this is not a diary this is survivor... Anyway this time I have some more constructive things to add! Okay so things are fine. Dan and I continue to bond, though he had to call me out on being bad at communication in order for our relationship to progress. I get it was like a check point or whatever and frankly I appreciated it. Like I said in my rant yesterday I have massive paranoia when comes to interacting with people and whether they like me or not, so constructive feedback while annoying is always helpful. Plus through research I found that he values a good social game so the fact that he's reaching out and telling me what I'm doing wrong is probably a sign that I'm not a lost cause :D. It turns out we have a few mutual friends our lord and savior John Coffey and also Sarah,... Lynn to be specific there are like a shit ton of Sara(h)s so should probably clarify lol. I want to work with him. I know he's in the majority alliance with the brawn tribe, which also contains Jakey and Jordan. Considering the fact that the beauties are slowly but surely getting eliminated, their favor would be helpful to me and mine. However, I know for sure that one of them wrote my name down. Honestly probably both of them. I know I keep harping on this fact but I just really really don't like the idea of looking like an idiot by aligning with someone who wanted me dead or wanted to fuck with me. If we do lose this challenge we are going to have to figure out who to keep or who to eliminate, I feel like it should be between those two. Mostly because I'm not exactly comfortable with a brawn majority. Like I know how people are saying tribe lines don't matter and while they don't, advantages do. And what more advantageous than being in a majority alliance? If we get rid of a brawn that would make it 4 brains- 4 beauty - 5 brawn. Which seems a bit more fair lol. Also RIP Connor remember how I said he was a threat? Welp I guess this is why they don't ask me for cast assessments :/ and also cause I was dead for like several years.

absolutely nothing has happened in fact i was kinda in a ~mood~ today so i feel like my social game took a big L because i didnt feel like talking to anyone and i was busy so i kept being that bitch to responding once an hour ..... but in other news i finally accessed the tomb, and once i started using more than one brain cell at a time i was able to get in and it was actually about 10x easier than i was making it out to be im not sure WHY i was struggling so much but of course, to no surprise i finally get in and the pedestal is empty AGAIN. Now there's not only at least 1 idol from the last time i went in the tomb gone, but there's possibly a second too, if not an advantage that can easily be played against me. At this point all i can do is try and recover a little bit, tomorrow ill have to just try more with my conversations and hopefully one of the people i can somewhat trust is the person who has whatever was in their time time around but probably not, it's never that easy

okay so i have a video confessional from earlier uploading which is kind of a recap of the last two rounds BUTTT!! liam just finished editing our video and i love it!! he did so good and our tribe all tried our best... im just hoping the other tribe didn't go bananas all out, because if they didn't we should hopefully win... i really wanna win immunity because otherwise i feel like adam is gonna be the vote and i dont want that anymore KJASDFA. i would just be sad because idk who the alternative would even be.... so basically we better win immunity KJLSADFA

Me: Alright everyone, make sure you film horizontally!!! Devon: Fuck you

Honestly!!! I take back what i said about Kendall. I feel like we’re making some strides to work together??? Or she’s playing me? I’m hoping to stir a Devon vote this round because I think he threw the vote on Kendall to piss me off, but who knows. I wanna talk to Jakey and see what he thinks about a me/him/augusto/Amir alliance to get through this vote? Idk I trust him but who knows!!!! Maybe everyone is lying to me??? 

okay... i know i said god is a woman and her name is autumn but its time for the remix. god is a woman and her name is alyssa's mum because alyssa's mum just rescued us from defeat in that challenge JKASDF the judges were kinda unnecessarily harsh but we move on. basically for the other tribe's tribal, i hope jake/dan/devon live... hopefully another scary old school person goes but tbh who knows what is going to happen?! im just so happy to have made f13, i said i'd come 14th in my intro so we love surpassing my own expectations

the immunity challenge went well, we won, which is good because i just didnt feel like going to tribal council because im honestly unsure what the hell is going on, i wanted to feel good about the connor vote because obviously that was my plan from the start however he just made it a little too easy by not talking to a lot of people allegedly, up until right before the vote, i dont think there'd be an easy vote next time we go to tribal, unless ... it's me... am i the easy vote?? i wanna really think im not but its just always too quiet to me when we dont go to tribal there's also lots of talk and speculation about a possible merge at 13, but me and my vivid imagination aka paranoia think maybe another swap of some sort could still happen even if for just another round or 2, i never knew with you sneaky hosts!! also i know we won in the challenge but we wouldve won in the challenge by even more if liam used more footage of my video i sent in i feel like i got no screentime!!! but of course i kept my big mouth shut for once because there's no i in team so ill try not to throw too much of a diva fit but listen... i tried to give yall a DEATH DROP, and i pulled a wig ruveal by snatching off my hat, and i was giving you a whole tik tok dance i made myself..... but there was no way i was doing more than beyonce's part so he didnt have much to work with so touche .... the full version i made will just be deleted scenes for myself ill reflect on when im more mature and think to myself "what the fuck was i doing?" 

So not to my surprise, we end up losing the challenge AGAIN!! I've just accepted that I really don't have any luck in this game. I was really hoping that we'd just win every challenge until the merge because I'm over going to tribal and voting people out. I feel like going to the amount of tribal councils that I have has left a huge target on my back. But at the same time, I'm playing the game more than other are. Maybe I have that going for me, who knows. Anyways, the Thots alliance is deciding on either Devon or Dan for this vote. I basically told them I was good with either, even though I would perfer to keep Devon so that I at least have more of an opportunity to rebuild our relationship. I've made it very clear that if the group as a whole wanted to do Devon that I'd write his name down to prove that I trust this group moving forward. So we decide to go with Dan for this vote, and this doesn't really sit well with Jakey. I'm not surprised by that, since I know he's wanted Kendall out for awhile now. But he is really adamant that he doesn't want Dan to go. Which I get, he thinks that Dan would trust him moving forward. When it comes to Dan though, his social game lacks so much that it's like "I don't even know if I can trust him moving forward". And I think the fact that Jakey more so wants to target Kendall this round instead of Dan is a strong sign for me. I'm pretty positive he has an idol since the brain one has been found and he's lied to me about clues before. So this has me thinking, maybe it's a good time to get Jakey out this round? Thinking about it numbers wise for the future, we don't really need Jakey's vote for a majority this round since the four beauties and myself makes 4, and if we bring in Devon that's 5. Plus, I don't even think that Jakey's under the impression that he would... get voted out this round. He seems offly confident that he's staying, just that Dan's going. But I like to think he'd let Dan be a sinking ship and go.. Idk I'm gonna try to pitch this to Amir and see what he thinks. I kind of tried to hint around it to Augusto that Jakey wasn't cool with it, but Augusto kind of turned a blind eye at that. And I don't trust Kendall with my thoughts since she's very blunt... so I wouldn't be surprised if she leaked my plans. Similarly to what Devon did when I voted him out last week. I'm hoping that Amir will see where I'm coming from and that he might be open to that concept. For all I know, I could be voted out this round. And honestly, that'd be the smart move for them to make because my perception in the game so far has been pretty spot on. I think my self awareness this time around has been an asset for me, so I'm hoping that I can get by this vote and hopefully enter the merge soon. 

Coming back into the game, I knew I needed to open up a bit and start to Slither earlier than I would imagine. After throwing a vote onto Kendall, I broke down any chance between the Beauty and Brawn working together to knock out myself and Scott. I haven't told anyone about my vote, and don't plan to. Going into this vote, Dan should be the obvious choice. OG Brawn hasn't suffered any additional losses in numbers, and I'm just too close with Augusto/Amir/Kendall to consider flipping. In preparation of tonight NOT being a swap, I established an alliance with Amir and Augusto. They are a duo in every sense, but attaching myself to them sets up the opportunity to at least CONSIDER voting out Scott next round. It would have to be between him and Scott. 

All I got to say is oof… I genuinely thought I was on vacation after the last round like I’ve been SO bad about talking to people or at least that’s how I felt cause I was operating at 60% instead of the 110% I do when I socialize. That being said, I have my goals that I want to stick to and see happen. Dan needs to leave this tribal so I can get Jakey out next even if Dan leaving makes me really sad. Dan leaving takes a number away from the Brawn and a number away from Jakey, who I am able to get out by keeping Devon and having him/Kendall/myself/Amir vote for him if we happen to lose again. The alliance of me/Kendall/Amir/Jakey/Scott went on call last night and it was deadass an hour and a half long call where everyone was like “idk who should go but I’m fine with whatever” although… that certainly wasn’t the case. I, personally, made points that were pro-Devon such as Devon not having any clear allies to reunite with at merge and things like that and EVENTUALLY at the last 5 minutes of the call, we decided that Dan leaving is the better option. Scott and I even discussed a Brawn having to go before we even did the call so yeah. One thing I could tell though? Jakey was not having it. I understand his frustration but you can’t have your cake and eat it too. I voted out AJ to prove that I am not here to play by tribal lines and you said you would do the same but here we are… Amir called me last night telling me about how Jakey was trying to strong arm him into voting Devon out because Jakey didn’t want to do Dan… like sir, I’m? I’m very happy that Amir came to me and confided in me to kinda spill out his emotions like that makes me <3 but it also made me wanna pop off at Jakey because I don’t like those approaches in games hgfjdks even if I do really like Jakey, I was just ugh gjfdks. That aside, I feel like I am doing good about getting information and building friendships out here like I’m DEADASS is almost every single alliance on the tribes I’ve been a part of and while I don’t get tons of info from direct sources (ie. Jakey), I get the information from close allies (ie. Amir) which in a way can be even better? That being said, I’ve been way too good at forming friendships that every vote makes me feel really bad? With Dan for example, I adore that man like even if he isn’t the most talkative he’s just amazing. But does Dan benefit my game as much as Devon? Not really, even if Dan wanted to align. I’m sticking to my promise of doing what I have to do and be a little bit more cutthroat than I usually am because I do genuinely want to win this game and I’ll do what it takes to get there. Honestly, I’d be SHOOK if we do not merge next round or the round after ghfjdksm but I’m just trying to plan ahead and look at my connections. My Thoth connections are Amir > Kendall > Devon > Scott > Jakey whereas my Hathor connections are Autumn > Duncan > Adam (?) > TJ > Jordan > Liam M > Ali. If we do merge, making a secret thing with Autumn would be KEY just to have another person in my corner but also I need to connect with a Brawn to be good with them yknow? It’ll definitely be interesting and I can see the merge being messier than a taco bell bathroom BUT I’m hyped at the same time?

How is it already Day 16? There seems to be something seriously wrong with that. Anywho, I've let myself take a quick step back on the social game these last few days. I think I've put in the work to cement a couple strong groups here and can put myself in a good spot, but now I can avoid being the person that probably would be seen as a huge threat in the near future. Once merge hits (which I'm hoping is this next round), I'm going to have to go back to bringing that social game to a 9 (10 is where the Alyssa threat level begins), but right now I'm hopefully putting myself in a good place. In the event we don't have a merge and have one more vote on Hathor, I really think I need to make a move on Ali. I realize I keep saying this and I'm going to feel awful when he sees this all, but he is such a HUGE threat, and I can't let him skate by to where there's no room to stop him. I made that mistake last time in letting the person I knew would win get too far without me being able to stop them. Not this time. Ain't no fucking way.

This may very well be my last confessional lmao. I’m just feeling very paranoid about this vote and honestly I wouldn’t be surprised if everyone votes for me except for Jakey. Or if he even flips to the majority against me. And honestly! I’ve come to terms with it. I really tried my best in the game and I can’t be mad about how I performed in this game specifically. I understand I’m a threat in these games and if people are worried about me end game, quite frankly they should be. I know that I’ve played Tumblr Survivor one too many times and should have quit while I was ahead. I know I’ve talked about working with Kendall and killing Devon, but honestly idk who is voting where. I think I’m going to try to just go with what I think is majority (against Kendall) and just hope to god I’m not going anywhere. I hate having this defeatist attitude, but if I get voted out I’m going to have zero hard feelings and take it in stride. I guess I’m just not cut out to win tumblr survivor ❤️

Our video was so iconic, SHOUT OUT TO ALYSSA'S MOM!!! I should really be making sure im fortifying the bonds i've made but im really just happy to be on break and not have tribal. I've only been to tribal once within a 7 day time span instead of the 4 times in 7 days the brains endured before. I will say i was positively shook to get the vote from connor, but i never thought i could play a perfect game anyways lol. I'm hoping to god that dan or jakey go, i dont want the brawns over here to have other options than autumn and i come merge. Im surprised at myself because im starting to really want to stick with all these people come a merge, i suppose we'll see how it goes and how my attitude changes moving forward. 

Sooooooo I actually felt kind of bad about voting for Dan until he was throwing my name out :/ I guess you can't teach an old dog new tricks. I'm kind of nervous now. Like Jakey told me this and he did the same thing to AJ. Also I haven't heard anything from Scott yet... that's sketchy right? Ugh I swear if I'm voted out then Alyssa's mom, I will meet you in the Denny's Parking lot for a fight. I'm not afraid to throw hands at the elderly, ask Drew. 

We love when men listen to me an in turn we win immunity! This is now the second time that's happened lmao cause I sure did make everyone commit to a time block so we didn't play ourselves in the endurance challenge and I sure did suggest Telephone as the song choice so wooooo Not a lot has happened and I don't have a lot of time to talk to begin with but I have a strong feeling we are not merging tonight lmao. Tbh I look forward to another day on Hathor it's very chill over here, all things considered. Also I need a couple chill challenges the next two rounds cause ya girl is moving, graduating, and leading an underground movement all at the same time so don't set me up with a crazy time-consuming challenge lol

I feel vindicated. Starting off in this game, I was not doing so well gameplay wise. Flash forward, I've been a big contributor physically, and socially too! I've got big plans, and I will carry this tribe again if I have to!

(may've already submitted this but i'm worried i submitted it for day 18?)

Also...

ok let me just start by saying: im in an emotionally FRAGILE state at the moment writing this right after the winners at war finale.....SPOILERS IF YOU HAVENT SEEN BUT I HAVE TO SAY IT....NATALIE AND WINCHELE ROBBED, as inspired as i am by my aries sistren natalie and think she should've won, im even more upset for my fellow beauty sister michele because lowkey? i absolutely LOVE the way michele plays, because in my own head at least i like to think i at least play slightly similar, i like to lay low and just adapt to where i see i can fit the best, anywho thats all ill say on that, back to THIS game dan being voted out last round, was kinda meh, i had the tiniest conversation with him during one world and he did end up giving me some tea about the brawns, but i couldve easily tried working with him later on against the beauties, PLUS him leaving means that none of those false beauties left, which is bad for me because i want them all gone oop and ive worked hard over here trying to make sure everyone knows they are threats even if theyre not working together, they went against me and lied to me, which means i cant trust them or work with them, which means i need to make sure no one else does either it's very nice though duncan has approached me and asked who i was comfortable with incase we did go to tribal and he said him and jordan pines were pretty close and honestly jordan is the only one ive been on a call with this whole game which is fine because anyone who knows me knows i dont care for calls much in this game and that usually hurts me so im hoping its not hurting me this time but truly, im not sure people are approaching me way more with information and plans then they ever have so im hoping thats a good sign, espcially with duncan saying he basically wanted me to be in the know with him, i think i can trust him as of now going foward and i hope the same about jordan pines, because first of all i love his energy and him as a person my fellow stoner crackhead, and second of all let's be real i definitely want to use him as a shield later on cmon the guy has a season named after him, forget denise being the queen slayer, i want to be the king tamer also in good with ali and autumn i think?? i personally enjoy my short little convos i have with them frequently so i just hope we're on the same page, but idk the little voice in the back of my head is telling me it all seems too good to be true almost like a perfect illusion and maybe duncan is tricking me trying to talk to me about "keeping this tribe strong", so i guess we'll have to wait until the next time we go to a tribal together to find out so yeah in conclusion, sorry to dan, and plot twist of the century im rooting for jakey to not be voted out the other tribe? even though im still convinced he could be making me his number 1 target especially if he gets in kahoots with kendall, but im hoping i played them against each other enough during the one world so that didnt happen 

What do ya know....another tribal council. After only being exempt from one tribal, this has become somewhat of a routine. I am extremely confident in the numbers this round. I'm under the belief that everyone will be writing down Jake's name, and Jake will likely be writing down my/Kendall's name. Still, I believe there is a worry about idols. I would hate to be idoled out by Jake after everything I have worked towards...I can't afford to throw my vote on Kendall or Scott with the merge coming up so soon, because it fractures my game going into a potential merge...Somewhat of a "all or nothing" bet tonight.

Me @ the brawns who have been on this tribe: https://media.giphy.com/media/szPZ2NXIGCMcE/giphy.gif

So a couple new developments: 1. Jordan offered me a final two which I'm sooooo excited to see how that's going to turn out. I've really connected with Jordan this game (which admittedly I didn't think would happen before this game), but he's been the person I've confided in the most out here. So I really think this is going to be the start of something amazing. 2. With this F2 deal, Jordan told me that Amir/Jakey knew each other outside of this game. This is bad for me both because Jakey is supposed to be my other guy with Jordan, but also Amir is the person I'd want to target come merge (which should be next round). I have zero connection to him, he's proven to be good at comps, he's won this game before, and he doesn't add into my plan of having numbers on every side. So now I'm in a spot where I think I'll probably have to make a move against potentially my closest / other closest ally in this game. Being safe right before the potential merge feels amazing and opens a lot of opportunities, but is extremely scary knowing who is going to merge. Hopefully come to merge, I have a chance at the merge idol to avoid anyone else having the chance at getting it, because I need some added knowledge in this game.

I am so fucking pissed at Devon. WHY ARE YOU ON THE BRAINS IF YOU HAVE NO BRAIN CELLS!!!!!!! dsfjkaafkjdaldjfjadksjads Great now I get to die!

I don't know why Jakey wants to kill me. I am not a threat. Like at all? Most of the strategies I come up with are bad and I am barely social? Sure I guess I can win like a challenge or two but not enough to be physical? I mean I'm trying to kill him but like... honestly he started it 2 rounds ago. I am a paper tiger worse I am a paper giraffe. Sure I'm tall but basically harmless and only sort of evil. At least I remember why I hated him so much. I don't hate him NOW, I'm 22 years old I have better things to do then hate some guy for trying to win a game. But I am annoyed and inconvenienced by this. Maybe a little hurt too because the only reason I can think to get voted out is because my personality sucks so much that he doesn't see a future where we can work together. Which is fair I guess? But I can't be that awful right? God this game is a constant existential crisis... Also I think people are annoyed with me for being paranoid and shit. Oh I'm sorry people who's name isn't getting written down, I'm sorry I'm not more pleasant while I'm in fear for my metaphorical life. 

It’s a MESS ITS A FUCKING MESS SCOTTIE WANTS DAN OUT DAN WANTS DEVON JAKEY WANTS DEVON DEFON WANTS DAN AUGUSTO AND KENDALL WANT JAKEY AMIR WANTS NOT JAKEY OR AUGUSTO OR KENDALL I literally don’t have number in this game and I’m going to get fucked on at the merge 

Okay so Augusto basically told him that his name was an option for this vote or the next one and Kendall told him that the brawns are bringing up his name and said that he was the throw away vote So now my gut is telling me dan did it and jakey was in on it But I don’t care, if that’s the case Everyone on this tribe wants a brawn out, EVERYONE I just have to make sure it’s not jakey Because Augusto and Kendall want jakey now and I refuse it Rn it seems they r okay doing dan It seems everyone is cool doing dan So I’m happy with that

Jakey is fucking strong arming me r u joking Ndbdjdjsns Jakey talked to scottie And got scottie to want devon So now they’re gonna try and call the alliance tmmrw and change to vote back to devon over dan And if Augusto and Kendall don’t want to Jakey wants to pull brain and brawn to vote kendall like sir I’m literally getting strong armed, and he can’t see why people want dan out I could make a move rn But should I even I probably shouldn’t If they try to get kendall I will flip it on him 

don’t know what to do I’m pleading so hard with jakey rn like hey it’s not good for me to go into merge with 6 brawn 4 beauty (dysfunctional) and 3 brain (dysfunctional) And I said I want to do dan is that okay like jakey u need to choose a side, brawns, or this tribe And he goes If u decide to do dan Then I’m gonna unite dan and Scott and Devon and vote kendall So if that’s the case, I’m sending u home theres no way around it then

Throw back to last night when I hung up on jakey to call Augusto and told jakey that I was taking a shower but literally I was gone for an hour and needed an excuse fast so I told him i shaved my ass call that strategic ass shaking 

Okay so this tribal. Everyone on my tribe thinks jakey is evil and he’s just going to go back to the brawn tribe, which is like, wtf, he literally voted in minority on purpose and gave us leverage on him. Like he literally has put himself on the line multiple times. He ratted out the brawn majority over and over. Like jakey is not loyal to the brawns on the other side at all. The people on this tribe don’t give a shit and my opinion isn’t being heard at all, Kendall won’t budge and Augusto won’t budge, and Scott wants to keep devon. Can I just say scott is a rat, he is playing every single person. Jakey trusted him soooo much . Anyway, everyone wants jakey out for literallt no reason and jakey trusts me 100% and jakey is the best way to get info from the brawns on the other side. Anyway, KDJDKSN KDNDKD we are getting dirty. Jakey has an idol. And I told him he was the vote and I made it sound like it’s all Scott’s decision cuz I’m really tight with Kendall and Augusto, so now, jakey wants to idol out Scott Basically, it’s time for a cluster fuck and it’s time for chaos So at merge jakey and I will play from Opposite sides

so jakey fking tried to flip the vote and he blew up the 5 person alliance to devon and hes fucking up my game so much nkwejfnkew god maybe i will try and get him out at merge even tho i love him, i basically had to ccreate this narrative that jakey thinks that me jakey scott and devon are voting kendall but jakey is actually voting out scott jesus christ thi round gave me a migraine i have a case of the lie-abetes

I- there's nothing else to say hahaha the boys don't even talk game. So when I know something y'all will know something

People are paranoid as hell about a merge. What is there to be paranoid about, honestly? I've just tried to come into this game and have a good time and I think I've achieved that. No one is really looking at me as a threat right now, and there's still plenty of time left to play.

okay so i filmed a video confessional earlier which i will upload but adam just woke me up to the fact that we might be merging tonight?! which is so exciting and kinda crazy.... and the days line up with montenegro for us to be merging... at merge i think all my "laying low" can finally be for something and i can transition the bonds i've been making into making stuff happen. i've also been hosting a game during these quarantine times and i've realised people that do too much making SUCH deep bonds during the early stages become the people the jury is mad at in the endgame. i feel like im the middle ground, people feel close to me (and I would like to think I've come across as likable) without everyone thinking im their soul sister closest ally. at merge i think my "close" people who i can somewhat rely on are: autumn, jake, dan(?), jordan(?) and adam? like i have a core of people with various connections, which gives me some cover. its just about then feeling out the rest and seeing who i can trust amongst the rest... particularly the unknowns of augusto/kendall/scott/amir (assuming they are all at merge). like that is going to be the most important part of the merge stage for me, is figuring out which of them i can trust (and i do think dan and/or jake's opinions can help with this, because brainstorming with autumn helped me figuring out this hathor swap tribe).

i'm excited for merge... i do think i have early juror written all over me but i am also very excited. its time to emerge from the shadows and stumble my way into the light

live fast die young merge boots do it well. i literally am a clown, i got excited by my guess going so well and now i literally am a target the size of the sun exclusively because of my own actions what was i thinking KJASDFA honestly at this point? i embrace it, i push the 'im a shield' narrative and i trot on my little trotters to being mayor of ponderosa. this season i chopped of my own head so will not be the winner and the king, but hopefully i can be a kingmaker? also if me winning the tiebreak sends jake home i literally will be so unspeakably frustrated with myself i will literally... scream. HE PROBS HATES ME. i'm praying he lives i will feel so bad if he doesnt KLASDF

i literally... can not believe i am so stupid my lack of braincells really boggles my mind

So I was really hoping that we would win this challenge today because I like everyone on this tribe. But of course with my luck in this game, we lose AGAIN. And it's a shame because I like the Thots Alliance and i feel bad voting out Devon. I know he's someone who trusts me and although I don't 100% trust him, I know that he's someone I can depend on. Plus he makes a really good goat at the end, so it'll make winning more of an obstacle for me without him there. To my surprise however, Kendall and Augusto approach me with the idea of voting out Jakey. I really like Jakey and I practically see him as my #1 here, so voting him out would be difficult for me to do as well. We've discussed the idol together, he gave me his CBS all access account info to watch the finale, and hes one of the very few smart people in this game. So on a personal level, this is a hard decision to make. However, from a game perspective, it might be the right call. Jakey's setting himself up to be a swing vote at the merge, and the fact that he campaigned for Dan to stay and was adamant on not voting him out shows that. When it comes to Devon and I, I would prefer to not vote Devon out but if I needed to in order to show that I trust an alliance moving forward I would. So the fact that Jakey doesn't see it like that is alarming to me. In addition to that, I know that Jakey has lied to me multiple times in this game. He purposefully gave me the wrong idol clue for one of the matches, and when I called him out on it he bluffed it up. On top of that, I know for a fact that he voted for Kendall during the AJ vote. And the fact that he's trying to play it off on Devon goes to show the lengths he would go to make sure he controls everything. And on top of that, he wants us all to tell Devon straight up that he's going. Like... did he not learn from my story when I tried to do that? It can't happen. From a game perspective, voting out Jakey is the more logical choice to make. He can navigate better in a group of people and is aware of whats going on. Devon on the other hand, doesn't even know where the idol is or how to look for it. Devon is someone who you can take into a merge and know what he's going to do. Jakey is more unpredictable. And I wouldn't be surprised if he tried to rally up troops to blindside me when that time came. From a personal perspective, I prefer that Devon goes just because of the lack of trust between us and the fact that I don't ever see myself fully trusting him. Sadly I have to lose this battle in order to win the war at the end. So I'm going to vote Jakey out tonight and really hope that it doesn't come to bite me in the but or that he doesn't play his idol (i know he has one, its obvious with how paranoid he's been)

Guess I’m gonna cry because we lost… by a tiebreaker… it was sad. I feel especially awful because had I not made the mistake of repeating a name on my list during my 8th guess, we could’ve very well have won… but no one needs to know that! It just blows because going into a potential merge in a 7-5 scenario is NOT it. Plus like, their only vote was a unanimous vote for Connor which like… love Connor, but a rock could vote Connor out. I wanted to see tension, I wanted to see idols played, I wanted to see hands thrown, I wanted to see lines drawn, and I wanted to see messiness but all I ended up seeing? Disappointment. I hate it here deadass (‘:

Aside from being kinda sad we lost, I do feel super secure. Last round, I wanted Dan to leave to get rid of Brawn numbers and have the best chance to get Jakey out and now I have that! I know Amir is on the fence but I know Kendall and Devon would be all for it (Scott is as well, but I didn’t really know how much he’d be about it until this round) so it needs to happen. While I adore Jakey as a person and we’ve connected a lot, our strategic games don’t align at all since he doesn’t tell me much of anything? Most of his info goes to Amir or Scott and I’m being selfish here but I want all the tea (‘: plus him playing double agent with the Brawns at merge is not what I need if we’re going into the merge with not enough numbers. Not only that but Adam is a wildcard in terms of if he’ll work with me or not but Jakey being there with us makes it so Adam wouldn’t want to so there’s that. Girl… i sound like a whole ass gamebot wtf ghfdjnms

It’s so weird like I am extremely proud of the game I am playing but I still feel inadequate as a player? I know I shouldn’t compare myself to others because I’m ME but my two closest allies (Kendall, Amir) are playing so much better? Amir is able to get all the tea in the world and form those important game connections which I don’t feel like I can yknow? With Kendall, she is just so bold (and beautiful) with her gameplay in a way I could never like she doesn’t mind being the secondary target, she talks to everyone and talks game with everyone, and stuff like that. So in a way, I’m probably not a major threat to people because those two icons are here BUT I also don’t know if that’ll make me seen like a non-factor… that’s just how I feel going into merge and it’s kinda mehhh idk ;-;

MERGE IS COMING. TOnight actually, people are speculating, but im the only one with the certainty that its tonight and im feeling wonderful. I think if I play my cards right Im gonna have a lot of options come merge. God pending Kendall does not die tonight (hopefully her beauties keep her alive) im gonna suggest we secret pair beware this shit and tsart working from opposite sides to keep each other safe. That will allow me to pick of people Im not working with, while hopefully ensure that people im not with who are with her will be detered from targeting me. Thats my plan but who knows what the true dynamics of merge will be. Ive been playing quiet so far but im about to become the star of teh show, my ego just cant take it.

i really feel like by getting a five i got jake voted out and i want to scream i literally am gonna be out for blood if he goes

[nnorsae]

Tagged by @dee-the-witch thank you so much! i rarely do these but eh i’mma do my best ^^

Rules: Answer these 92 statements and tag people

THE LAST:

1. Drink: Milk 2. Phone call: i think it was mom? maybe my dad? 3. Text message: yeah, my friend ^^ 4. Song you listened to: imagine dragons - thunder 5. Time you cried: haaa just a while ago

HAVE YOU:

6. Dated someone twice: i never dated anyone 7. Kissed someone and regretted it: nah i also never kissed someone  8. Been cheated on: no. 9. Lost someone special: dissociated. our relationship got lost in the mist. 10. Been depressed: oh well i’ve been falling in and out of it, but i’m trying really hard to recover. 11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: i never even tho im okay with drinking

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS:

12-14. all shades of green, blue and red 

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

15. Made new friends: a lot of them and i love them all!!! 16. Fallen out of love: it all got lost in the mist. 17. Laughed until you cried: oh, long time ago. didn’t had anyone to laugh with. 18. Found out someone was talking about you: haa i mean i hope no one does, because i get really tense or nervous when i hear my name in another ppl conversations (usually i await mocking)    19. Met someone who changed you: i got closer to such person. but did not meet them, i think i knew them for like a year or so? 20. Found out who your friends are: kinda? i mean i like getting to know a person better (even for the worst) 21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: um no

GENERAL:

22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: all of them i think 23. Do you have any pets: i do have an smol angry birb, an playful smol angry cat and two dogs who want to eat each other alive 24. Do you want to change your name: i dunno lol i got used to it? like that’s just how ppl call me. i would badly get used to a new name tho. 25. What did you do for your last Birthday: oh i dunno fell deeper into depression? we had a party, it wasn’t the best but i still at least got my apple cake! 26. What time did you wake up: about 5 am and then slept for another hour

27. What were you doing at midnight last night: i was on tumblr still and probably studying or something like that? maybe procrastinating?

28. Name something you can’t wait for: well my trip to Opava w my choir

29. When was the last time you saw your mom: she just went to sleep 30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: lol get my life together? i mean everything always goes wrong but thats cuz my laziness and everything so i guess stop being so lazy. 31. What are you listening to right now:  i’m letting phone do it’s own thing but right now? imagine dragons - gold 32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: m classmate i don’t talk to him tho he’s kinda weird 33. Something that is getting on your nerves: right now? myself probably. pull yourself together boy  34. Most visited website:well this hellsite, bakaláři cause i don’t know what’s happening and? ?? uhhhh google search 35. Mole/s: i have like quite lot of em but like everywhere on my body 36. Mark/s: i mean my legs still have my cut marks, my both ankles have mark after being stitched n stuff, i have an mark after stitch on my head (sliced it thank to glass table) else just bruises and cat scratches 37. Childhood dream: i. always. wanted. something. fairytailey!!!! i love princess or like kingdoms and empires kind of fantasy plus elves or like with different creatures from the forest? i always played the mage/hunter princess as a kid so yeah? something like that would be nice. 38. Hair color: dirt blonde with like one very blond bang its not that visible unless on direct light   39. Long or short hair: short hairrr  40. Do you have a crush on someone: its occasional. like i try to keep my distance because i almost always fall in love who just slightly shows some care about me? like okay not always but if we’re really good friends i just can’t help it... ts could so something bout this too 41. What do you like about yourself?: the only thing thats i feel is very me. my stubborness. when i am sure of something you can’t change my mind. it happens rarely but i still possess this weird trait and it’s kinda nice to be determined for once in a while? i mean i also want to prove ppl wrong especially when they say something mean and i don’t have my depression episode... like calmly laugh it off and then do what they fucking think you can’t cause fuck em. they didn’t see it doesn’t matter. you did it. you know you’re able to do it and you’ve proven yourself worthy. 42. Piercings: i have ear piercings but i almost never wear earrings so they’re pretty useless. 43. Blood type: B+ i think. 44. Nickname: Kilda (based off my last name? surrname? what the hell is příjmení in english) and Smartie (im smart when im not in school and it sucks) 45. Relationship status: im like very unexperienced and also single. probably forever. 46. Zodiac: im libra but somehow i relate more to taurus  47. Pronouns: nonbinary (but got used to calling she/her. i see myself more masculine but like not that it matters that much it would be kinda confusing) 48. Favorite TV Show(s): I don’t watch TV? But i guess Friends, since it’s the only show i was able to see few episodes off 50. Right or left hand: im right handed but sometimes i suck at right so i use left!!! 51. Surgery: never had one 52. Hair dyed in different color: i wish. i want to bleach my hair. like not completely white but like to make it more blonde i guess. not like yellow blonde but more like platinum blonde? soft blonde. i dunno how to explain it 53. Sport: i like ball sports except for basketball. i swim and snorchel tho 55. Vacation: i always wanted to go to norway and iceland. i have to someday. 56. Pair of trainers: dark blue vans my best friends

MORE GENERAL:

57. Eating: i really like pizza  58. Drinking: coffee, milk or water 59. I’m about to: sleep 61. Waiting for: something to open my eyes 62. Want: just a really good friend? i feel like i need to hug someone 63. Get married: my parents want me to, but honestly? i’ll see how it turns out because i kinda don’t want things to happen as my parents want so yeah i’ll see how things turns out 64. Career: i wanted to be like an illustrator/writer but like not even half sure dude

WHICH IS BETTER

65. Hugs or kisses: i never been kissed but hugs are nice 66. Lips or eyes: eyes 67. Shorter or taller: i have no preference 68. Older or younger: older 70. Nice arms or nice stomach: wtf 71. Sensitive or loud: i kinda like both?? theyre so precious 72. Hook up or relationship: listen i cant get it on with a hook up i literally hate hook ups because i suffer from something called not being attracted to someone unless i know them well?? 73. Troublemaker or hesitant: depends. I’m usually hesitant tho.

HAVE YOU EVER:

74. Kissed a Stranger: never tahnks 75. Drank hard liquor: i though it was a water ok i didnt knew my granny wanted to drink some hard alcohol in a water glass  76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: i broke em? but never lost em 77. Turned someone down: yeah i did. i feel bad but it’s like long time ago.  78. Sex on the first date: wtf ppl 79. Broken someone’s heart: i hope i didn’t    80. Had your heart broken: yeah... 81. Been arrested: broke the law few times but they never caught me 82. Cried when someone died: yeah.... 83. Fallen for a friend: OH BOY I FEEL PERSONALLY ATTACKED RIGHT NOW (yes i did and like i guess they didnt know and still i wouldnt even confess to them so it wouldn’t really matter)

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

84. Yourself: im trying my best to   85. Miracles: hell yeah 86. Love at first sight: no? 87. Santa Claus: that fat man can go back where he came from 88. Kiss on the first date: i mean if they want to?? it would be really akward tho jesus christ...

OTHER:

90. Current best friend name: I don’t have one, sadly. 91. Eye colour: Light green but people usually say it’s blue or grey 92. Favourite movie: i dunno man i like horror movies but i don’t have my favorite

Everyone who wants to do thsi feel free to do it!! i can’t think of ppl who i would tag @chibipu maybe?? only if you want to tho 

[lovelydeceitff]

Chapter 4

I don’t ever tell you how I really feel, cause I can’t ever find the words to say what I mean… Just a little bit of your heart is all I want

Shay

It’s only been 3 weeks into the semester and sad to say I’m already over it. Well not completely, I guess you can say I’m more overwhelmed. I’m taking 18 credit hours and I’m trying to get a head of my syllabus before I become lazy. My classes aren’t bad.. it’s just a lot of work. I have a solid 3.0 cumulative right now and I’m trying to raise that as high as I can by the end of the year. Im shocked that my gpa isn’t higher than that being that I’ve had over a 3.2 for like 3 semesters but whatever.

Living with Keith has became a bit stressful too… on top of my job and school work. He gets so stressed and takes it out on me. Right now we’re going through a thing where he’ll give me an attitude for no reason at all. I get him food, he has an attitude. I talk to him, he has an attitude. I’ve been dealing with this for so long I really should be used to it. He gets so stressed with school and work that I just become like a fly that won’t leave him alone. I understand. I try my hardest too. But imagine going through this often. Like at least twice a month, but for days each time. It’s tiring.

It makes me not want to be around him, but since he’s staying with me I have to. Some times I just leave my room and hang with the other people in the building when he lays down for bed so I won’t go to sleep angry. He’s so up and down I never know what to expect with him.

Right now I’m in my room waiting for Keith to tell me to come let him in. Today has actually been better than others. We’ve been texting all day and honestly that could be the reason I’m in a great mood. Keith plays a big part in how I’m feeling for the day unfortunately. If he irritates me, I’ll be annoyed until I can get my mind off how much he pissed me off. But today we’re good.

9:06pm Keith❤️: leaving the rec now, I’ll be downstairs in 5 minutes.

Once I got that text, I hurried up and cleaned the little mess I made trying to get dressed this morning then I went down to let him in. He wasn’t there yet, so I conversed with my coworker who was working the front desk until he arrived.

He knocked on the glass door to signal me that he’s here, I went towards the automatic doors so he can come in.

“Hiiii baby” I happily greeted him as he walked in.

“Hey” Keith said dryly.

See, up and down with him. He was just fine.

We’re waiting on the elevator which is right off the sitting area of the lobby. It’s people down here tonight and for some reason I feel like everyone can sense how awkward we look. Well, how uninterested he looks. I always feel this way even though we aren’t talking very loud and chances are no one is paying us any attention.

“How was your day today?” I asked trying to make some type of small talk to break the ice.

“It was cool.”

We got on the elevator. “Yea mines is going pretty good. You okay?”

“Yup”

We got off the elevator and I keyed into my room. Silence. No words from him. No words from me. Keith began to heat himself up some Ramen noodles and then got the books out of his book bag. I guess that’s what’s wrong, he’s stressed again

“You sure you okay? You must have a lot of homework.” I asked

“Im fine. I just have to revise my paper and turn it in. ” Keith said plainly as he started to eat his food.

“Well let me tell you about my day…”

I began to tell Keith about a situation that happened with my coworker and I. I started off with a what would you do question. But I got silence so I never even was able to actually tell my story. I literally asked what would you do if blah blah? And I got nothing back. Was I talking to a damn wall? Come on now.

“Keith, what would you do?”

Silence. He was eating his noodles while starting up his laptop. He gave me silence as if he started revising his paper and was trying to focus. To stop me from snapping, I just quit everything I was doing and went to shower.

This happens too often for me man. Imagine being so excited to talk to your boyfriend just to get pAid dust. All the time. It really sucks because when we’re good, We’re excellent. Imagine your significant other treating you so awesome and like you��re the queen of his world in front of all your friends. Making you smile and feel all special. Just for you to go upstairs to your room and not get that same energy. Instead you feel like you’re unwanted.

Unwanted. That’s how I’ve felt on way too many occasions. I’m fed up. Keith is so complicated and I hate it.

Before getting in the shower, I opened Twitter just to let out some type of frustration.

@ShiningShay: I’m so tired of this shit man

I scrolled a bit then got into the shower. I immediately started to cry. I’m not emotional from this one incident it’s this one and every time and other thing before it. He keeps coming to MY room and won’t even talk to me. That’s so disrespectful. Act like you love me, then you can get all sour. This particular thing has been going on for a few days. Eventually we’ll be good again, I just don’t know when.

I got out of the shower. And just relaxed in my towel for a minute. I didn’t even want to leave the bathroom. I grabbed my phone just to find a text message from Chris.

10:02pm Chris: You okay?

10:07pm Shai: Yea, I’m fine. Thanks for asking.

I really just wanted to tell him everything that’s going on. But, that’s against the code. You don’t tell your relationship problems to another man.

10:07pm Chris: No problem, just checking on you. How’s your relationship going?

This is not an uncommon question for Chris to ask. I was never able to figure out why he asks me this. I think he just wants to make small talk, but sometimes I’m like naw…he wants to know if I’m single.

10:08pm Shai: Going good, hbu? Got yourself a girl yet?

Last semester, our spring semester of sophomore year, he’d come to my room in between our classes and we’d talk about his girl problems. Seriously. His girl problems, his friend problems, and any other thing. He claims he’d come to my room to nap since he moved off campus but this dude never went to sleep. He’d always wanna talk.

I decided to leave the bathroom. Keith and I still said no words to each other, it was still awkward and I kept laughing because of it. Not too long after i made myself comfortable, Keith closed his computer and got in the shower. I always feel like he’s cheating on me when these times come around. Keith honestly doesn’t have much time to cheat and I truly believe he couldn’t. I become the girlfriend that checks her boyfriends phone around times like this. I know, horrible. But can you blame me? If Keith isn’t talking to me, he gotta be talking to somebody but no. He’s never secretive. He’ll leave his phone around me, even ask me to check and respond to messages. He doesn’t do weird things that make me suspect that he’s cheating other than not talk to me.

It doesn't help that Keith is as fine as he is. So I always end up thinking some girl stole his attention from me. Keith and I met through mutual friends but I already knew who he was prior to us meeting. He was literally jaw dropping fine. I seen him and was stuck one day. Yea I don't know how I got him. But the universe wanted us together for whatever reason. It worked out though. Through his rollsrcoaster emotions we made it 1 year and 6 months. We'll make 2 years in March. If we can get to March.

10:24pm Chris: Lol no, no girlfriend. You know that.

10:25 Shai: I was just asking lol remember last semester you was telling me about those girls. You said you was thinking about wifing one.

10:25 Chris: Oh yeah! Wow Shay, that was so long ago. Things changed lol. If I had a girl, you’d know. No doubt.

I probably wouldn’t know. I don’t talk to Chris like that. We made a promise that we’d try to work on our friendship over the summer. We said that when school started we’d talk and hang more. So here we are.

Keith came out of the bathroom and began getting his things together for tomorrow.

“Did you get your paper turned in?” I asked him

“Yes” He said, but this time not as dry.

10:29pm Shai: You’ll get one lol then we’ll see.

I turned my phone on vibrate. I didn’t want to start any arguments on why Chris was texting me. Keith and Chris don’t know each other. They’re two different kind of guys, they’d probably never even run into each other. I don’t mind them knowing each other, Keith does know that Chris and I are friends. I just don’t want him to trip that it’s 10:30 and we’re talking about him not having a girlfriend. Even though the conversation isn’t like that.

Keith got into bed after he finished up his nightly routine. He told me goodnight and rolled over. I continued to play on my phone and text Chris. Homecoming is in 2 and a half weeks so I’m choosing between my final 3 outfits so I can order them. Homecoming came quick this year. September 30. Like wtf. We just started school. How can I focus on school work and what I’m gonna wear to the hoco parties??

I sent pics to my best friends, Ashley and Kammy. We’ve been helping each other so we won’t go out looking busted. Or in the same outfit.

I eventually finished up my convo with Chris. He asked me what I was doing, I lied and told him I was going to sleep. We ended our conversation with a goodnight. I really didn’t wanna keep talking with him. Plus I really did need to go to sleep.

————

I woke up the next morning to Keith calling me to open my door. He went to work and class. So it’s almost 9:30am. I hate being woken up out of my sleep so much. He knows that but, I’ve been doing better. I normally give him a huge attitude when he calls in the morning to open my door. I have no clue how he gets in the building but whatever. He came in and greeted me happily, shockingly. He talked to me about work and then we went back to sleep until it was time for his next class and my first.

I woke up to Keith preparing for his next class, meaning that it’s time for me to wake up. It’s 10:50. My class is at 12. I kissed Keith goodbye and then checked my phone.

10:37am Chris: Goodmorning Shay 😌

I sent him a good morning back while carrying confusion all over my face. I don’t usually get a good morning message from Chris. I thought he was gonna say that he was about to come over and nap before his class or something. Like he used to. But no instead he sent:

10:40am Chris: how’s your morning going?

Since when does this happen? I only get messages like this from Keith. He texts me good morning everyday while he’s at work. Chris must be trying to make sure I’m not sad from yesterday. Matter of fact, that HAS to be why. It is why. That’s how Chris is. Being thoughtful and trying to make sure others are happy.

10:45 Shai: just getting started, I just woke up

10:46 Chris: I forgot you said you start at 12! Well enjoy your day Shay 😌

Let me stop thinking so hard on this…

Time to enjoy my day, as he said.

[chanxyeollie]

70 questions, tagged by @stan-the-best-stan-monsta-x thx bby

1. do you have a good relationship with your parents? uhhh... well me & my mom generally have a good time, she acts more sisterly if that makes sense?? but me and my dad butt heads A LOT and do not get along very often.

2. who did you last say “i love you” to? see i’m pretty uncomfortable physically saying the words but like probably my cat or something lol.

3. do you regret anything? um YES let’s see off the top of my head: dying my hair red in the sixth grade, putting waaaay too much cheese on the pizza i had the other day, and being such a shitty student this year haha.

4. are you insecure? yES. i mean i have this rule that everyone who knows me in irl knows. like no one is allowed to take pictures of me. or share pictures of me. if they want a picture i have to take it or i have to direct them. there are years of pictures of my growth or w/e missing and it pisses my parents tf off lol.

5. what’s your relationship status? single as the day i exited the womb

6. how do you want to die? preferably when i’m asleep i mean??? like i don’t wanna feel anything so...

7. what did you last eat? pork? and then right after whipped cream from a can because that’s who i am as a person.

8. played any sports? hahahahahah fun fact i don’t play sports because i have really weak ankles - i’ve sprained both of them twice!

9. do you bite your nails? ugh yes... i had three years where i didn’t but now i do. :/ i’m trying to break the habit by carrying an unlimited amount of nail files with me. i miss having long nails SO MUCH.

10. when was your last physical fight? two nights ago, my mom came home after work at like midnight and hid behind a wall to scare me, which resulted in a ninja-like slap from me.

11. do you like someone? the beauty of being socially awkward and anxious and being in a uni where you don’t have to talk to anyone means there is no one to get to know and crush on. nice. :-)

12. have you ever stayed up 48 hours? no, i’ve stayed up for 37 but that was the longest and i was... pretty wacked out by then but that’s a story for another time.

13. do you hate anyone at the moment? if i do i’ve blocked them from my mind i??? can’t think of anyone at this particular moment, probably just fictional characters.

14. do you miss someone? i’m gonna say this really adorable cat named toby that i saw at a petsmart like a year ago. i hope he found a good home.

15. have any pets?
 three cats! boris, pepper, and widget.

16. how exactly are you feeling at the moment?
 um a little bit numb because i’m sitting on my foot but otherwise neutral.

17. ever made out in the bathroom? no

18. are you scared of spiders?
 yeah the story of the first time i stayed up for a full 24 hours relates to a spider. also when i was very little i had a night terror where i had materialized a tarantula the size of me on top of me in my bed and well. that scarred me for life yanno?

19. would you go back in time if you were given the chance? fuckin yeah i’d tell myself not to confess to that one guy. embarrassing

20. where was the last place you snogged someone? never lol

21. what are your plans for this weekend?
 crying before i start work on monday. i really don’t wanna go back, fuck.

22. do you want to have kids? how many? yeah! i already made a pact with myself that if i’m still single when im in my thirties i will adopt some kids. 

23. do you have piercings? how many? just my ears~

24. what is/are/were your best subject(s)? um well once it was english but NOT ANYMORE LOL

25. do you miss anyone from your past?
 no, i don’t think so.

26. what are you craving right now?
 surprisingly more of the pork i had earlier even tho i didn’t really like it lol??

27. have you ever broken someone’s heart?
 no

28. have you ever been cheated on?
 no, kinda have to have had a boyfriend for that to happen

29. have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?
 no

30. what’s irritating you right now? the exam i have tomorrow. i should have withdrawn from that class i’m gonna have two F’s on my transcript wails

31. does somebody love you? my youngest cat. i am her mom.

32. what is your favourite color? black, pink in your area

33. do you have trust issues? yes but at the same time no

34. who/what was your last dream about? omg k let me get out my dream journal hang on... okay a short synopsis: my friend owned a burger king in this area near our high school (idk??) and i worked there w her, her boyfriend, and a few other people but one of the guys took my uniform which was, by the way, for some reason pastel blue and pink overalls but like shorts? and they were puffy like winter jackets. and then so i couldn’t work but i was still there and then allison and lydia from teen wolf walked in and we had like a reunion bc apparently we were friends lol and then scott came in and then stiles came in after him and i like ran to him and we hugged. idk what happened in my head man.

35. who was the last person you cried in front of? omg... my roommate. because i read a really sad fic and i tried to hide my tears w my blanket bUT SHE CAUGHT ME and then i started laughing while bawling my eyes out simultaneously bc i was embarrassed rip.

36. do you give out second chances too easily? gdi yeah i do. but i’ll bitch abt the person a fair amount first.

37. is it easier to forgive or forget? forgiving is hard but i’d never want to forget anything someone did to me. i’d want to remember so i can caution myself to make sure the same thing doesn’t happen again.

38. is this year the best year of your life?
 um no unless the second half is gonna have a really great turn around.

39. how old were you when you had your first kiss? well i can tell you at this rate i’ll be 20 or over when it finally happens

40. have you ever walked outside completely naked? (réka omfg i laughed so hard at ur answer) no i have not. but once i forgot to take my pajamas off and just put my clothes over them and then when i went to the bathroom later in the day i was really fucking confused

51. favourite food?
 well you got ur meats, steak, bacon, any sort of chicken. but you got pizza too. and you got sugar waffle cones... i mean like how am i to pick?

52. do you believe everything happens for a reason? i mean i hope it does because otherwise that’s just a big fuck u from the universe.

53. what is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night?
 (réka fuck me up enter the realm of exo) um i read exo fics and then i was on @vixx17andbtsimagines‘s blog catching up on her stuff.

54. is cheating ever okay? noooooooooooooo~~~~~~ its not like wtf is that why would you put someone through the pain that’s so shitty. idc the circumstance.

55. are you mean?
 no i’m really not but my face and fast-paced walk and avoidance of ppl makes them think i’m a mega-bitch. seriously, at least three of my friends have told me that was their first impression of me yikes.

56. how many people have you fist fought?
 technically two but very lowkey. the first one was a very hesitant, light slap to the face of this boy when i was in the sixth grade - i was very scared to do this but afterwards he cried and said i broke his jaw lmAO. and this doesn’t really count but this guy i was friends with was sitting across from me at a table and he jokingly threw a plastic fork at me and out of pure reflex i smacked him across the face. this has happened more than once disclaimer rofl.

57. do you believe in true love?
 books make me want to believe it. but i don’t really know. i feel that can only be answered by someone who’s experienced it idk??

58. favourite weather?
 just... march, october, and november because that is when there are no bugs and it’s cold enough to wear pants and the bulk of my clothes without sweating/freezing.

59. do you like the snow?
 yeah if i’m not in it lol. those canadian winters, man

60. do you wanna get married? yeah i’d like to one day, but when i think abt having the ceremony i get very anxious haha

61. is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? that depends on the person?? but i feel like i’d personally be such a sucker for it if it was from the right guy lol

62. what makes you happy?
 the rare perfect cup of coffee, music, smyang’s music box version’s of songs, exo and bts crack videos (i die every time), having a good ass sleep with my body pillow to name a few.

63. would you change your name? yeah i go by aluri everywhere because its what i want to change my name to. by this point i’ve ‘had’ it for ten years and even though my family/irl friends don’t call me it, that’s all the online knows me as.

64. would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed?
 well the last person i kissed was in a dream and it was mark from got7 so no, not at all ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

65. your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? i don’t have one of those anymore so

66. do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? no?

67. who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to?
 shocker it was my dad lmao

68. who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? my roommate. which sucks because we aren’t roomies anymore and i’m gonna miss our car talks so much. :/

69. do you believe in soulmates?
 if the reason i haven’t been so much as looked at by a guy is because the world is saving me for my soulmate then sure. but otherwise NO

70. is there anyone you would die for? my oldest cat boris. :/ he’s kind of my best friend so what’re you gonna do, you feel? i love doing things like this as an excuse to talk abt myself  & it was really fun so thank you for tagging me babe @stan-the-best-stan-monsta-x and i loved reading yours!! and um gonna tag my two mains again @tearsmp4 @bunmyeon because a) i love them b) i have no other friends seriously also @sooberri if you wanna do this i’d like to know more about you as creepy as that sounds ^^

[stonerkat96]

Some real creepy shit get your fix

Some real creepy shit, get your fix. -I doubt it'll be creepy really but ok here we go again- 1. Think of the last person who said I love you, do you think they meant it? Yes i do 2. Would you date an 18-year-old at the age you are now? -No i wouldn't 3. When’s the last time you were aggravated and happy at the same time? -Probably this morning lol 4. Would you ever smile at a stranger?-i always smile at strangers?? 5. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are? -there was idk if there still mad 6. Have you heard a song that reminds you of someone today? - snow the product reminded of of casey lol 7. What exactly are you wearing right now? -Uh yoga capries a half sleeve shirt and a yellow California jacket 8. How often do you listen to music? -Pretty often everyday 9. Do you wear jeans or sweats more? -Jeans i own two pears of sweats i need more 10. Do you think your life will change dramatically before 2018? -Probably not but who knows 11. Are you a social or an antisocial person? -Im honestly right in between it depends on the day and who I'm being social with 12. Have you ever kissed someone whose name begins with the letter ‘A’? -Every single day 13. What about ‘R’? -Nope 14. Can you drive a stick shift? -Kindaaaa been a while my cars auto 15. Do you care if people talk badly about you? -The honest answer is yes, i hate it but i always want people to like me. 16. Are you going out of town soon? -I live in a area wear driving two miles is out of town so probably lol 17. When was the last time you cried?- I cry a lot im on my period lol 18. Have you ever told someone you loved them? -many people 19. If you could change your eye color, would you?- probably to blue or green because who doesn't love blue or green eyes, everyone thinks brown is boring lol 20. Is there a boy who you would do absolutely everything for?- Yes there is 21. Name something you dislike about the day you’re having. -my cars transmission gave out 22. Is it cute when guys kiss you on your forehead?-uhhh duuuh lol 23. Are you dating the last person you talked to?- yes i am 24. What are you sitting on right now?- my couch 25. Does anyone regularly (other than family) tell you they love you?- yes indeed 26. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have? -honestly not that i can think of 27. Who was the last person you talked to before you went to bed last night?- alex of corse 28. Do you get a lot of colds? -recently yes 29. Where is the shirt you are wearing from? -my mother lol 30. Does anyone hate you?- oh im sure 31. Do you have any empty alcohol bottles hidden somewhere in your room? -nope not much of a drinker 32. Do you like watching scary movies? - i love scary movies, pretending to be scared is the best 33. Do you want your tongue pierced? - yes but doubt i could ever do it 34. If you had to delete one year of your life completely, which would it be? -2012 35. Did you have a dream last night? -Like 5 lol 36. When was the last time you told someone you loved them? -5 minutes ago 37. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years? -Very possibly 38. Do you think someone has feelings for you? -Yessss 39. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now? -Yeess 40. Did you have a good day yesterday? -Uhhh it was okay 41. Think back 2 months ago; were you in a relationship? -Yes i was 42. In the next 48 hours, will you hang out with a girl? -For like 15 minutes yes 43. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you? -Yes a few people 44. What’s the best part about school? -Friendship 45. Do you have any pictures on your Facebook? - yeah i have loads of pictures on fb 46. Do you ever pass notes to your friends in school? -I did and one time i called a teacher a bitch in my note she found in my binder n she told the principle and i got a week of detention. That was 8 years ago. Damn time flys 47. Do you replay things that have happened in your head?-all the time 48. Were you single over the last summer?- off and on 49. Is your life anything like it was two years ago?- not at all 50. What are you supposed to be doing right now?- nothing lol 51. Do you hate the last guy you had a conversation with?- no ??? Why would i have talked to him 52. Are you nice to everyone?- mostly 53. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to? - of corse 54. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat? - ive gone three years 55. Are you good at hiding your feelings? - not at all. 56. Do you think you like someone? - yes 57. Have you kissed someone whose name starts with a ‘J’? -Yes i have lol 4 58. Do you prefer to be friends with girls or boys? -Friends are friends and friends are hard to come by 59. Has anyone of your friends ever seen you cry? -Yes a few times 60. Do you hate anyone? -A couple people 61. How’s your heart?-right now its pretty great 62. Is there something that happened in your past that you hate talking about? - everyone has something. 63. Have you ever cried over a guy? - a few guys 64. Who is probably talking a load of crap about you right now? - probably no one 65. Are your toenails painted pink? - there not painted 66. Will your next kiss be a mistake? - loool no 67. Girls love it when boyfriends cry; correct? - wtf no thats fucked up lol 68. Have your pants ever fallen down in public? -Lol no thank godddd 69. Who was the last person you were on the phone with? - my mother 70. How do you look right now? - hairs in pigtails just chillen, 71. Do you have someone you can be your complete self around? -Yes i do 72. Can you commit to one person? -Yes i can 73. Do you have someone of the opposite sex you can tell everything to? -Yeppers 74. Have you ever felt replaced?- yes by my best friend 75. Did you wake up cranky? -Today??? Nope 76. Are you a jealous person?- depends 77. Are relationships ever worth it? - i guess 78. Anyone you’re giving up on? - i gave up one someone i loved a lot a year ago 79. Currently wanting to see anyone? - yes 80. Name something you have to do tomorrow? - call my dad 81. Last person you cried in front of? - alex 82. Is there someone you will never forget? -zachary 83. Do you think the person you have feelings for is protective of you? Sometimes 84. If the person you wish to be with were with you, what would you be doing right now? -fucking 85. Are you over your past? - yes and no 86. Have you ever liked one of your best friends of the opposite sex? - i thought i did lol 87. Is there anyone you can tell EVERYTHING to? - yes yes yes 88. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept? -thatd be fuckin weird as fuck n no lol 89. So, the last person you kissed just happens to arrive at your door at 3AM; do you let them in? -Id be like how the fuck did you outside??? And whyyy ? 90. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated? -Lol yep 91. Will you be in a relationship in 2 months? -Hopefully lol plannin in it 92. Is there anyone you know with the name Michael? Lol a few ppl. I took a michaels virginity 93. Have you ever kissed a Matthew? Nope 94. Were you in a relationship in January? How was it going? Yeah and good 95. Were you happy with the person you liked in March? Yes lol 96. Don’t tell me lies, is the last person you texted attractive? Very 97. Who do you have texts from? -Lol I'm gonna list them all okay, JFK 98. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say? Depends lmao 99. Have you ever kissed someone older than you? -Mostly ppl that are older lol 100. Who’s in your profile picture with you? -No one jus meee 101. Ever kissed under fireworks? Yes :) 102. Has anybody ever given you butterflies? Very much so --how tf was this creepy lmao ok---- ask me stuff?

[bvllts]

1-100 if u want

oh man ok ty!

1: is there a boy/girl in your life? yes a very lovely boy

2: think of the last person who hurt you; do you forgive them? no.

3: what do you think of when you hear the word “meow?” my cat ziggy stardust

4: what’s something you really want right now? right this second idk but i can't wait for the year to end and to move out and live on my own

5: are you afraid of falling in love? not anymore, not really

6: do you like the beach? sure

7: have you ever slept on a couch with someone else? yess

8: what’s the background on your cell? green stary sky

9: name the last four beds you were sat on? my bed at my dad's, bed at my mom's, my boyfriend's bed, my mom's bed and a friend's bed

10: do you like your phone? it's really old and slow and isnt working well anymore

11: honestly, are things going the way you planned? not really but they're pretty good

12: who was the last person whose phone number you added to your contacts? i think it was my boyfriend lol

13: would you rather have a poodle or a rottweiler? rottweiler

14: which hurts the most, physical or emotional pain? emotional

15: would you rather visit a zoo or an art museum? a museum, zoos are gross anyways

16: are you tired? i kind of am actually

17: how long have you known your 1st phone contact? not sure what this is supposed to mean but i've known my oldest friend for a little bit over ten years

18: are they a relative? no

19: would you ever consider getting back together with any of your exes? no.

20: when did you last talk to the last person you shared a kiss with? like an hour ago

21: if you knew you had the right person, would you marry them today? i don't really understand this question but i dont want to get married today

22: would you kiss the last person you kissed again? yes a million times

23: how many bracelets do you have on your wrists right now? 0

24: is there a certain quote you live by? no

25: what’s on your mind? him i guess

26: do you have any tattoos? i wish

27: what is your favorite color? i love green im in my green phase but yellow and red are nice too and black is the best safest color

28: next time you will kiss someone on the lips? hopefully sunday, or wednesday

29: who are you texting? no one

30: think to the last person you kissed, have you ever kissed them on a couch? yes one of our first kisses in fact

31: have you ever had the feeling something bad was going to happen and you were right? yea ig

32: do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to? yes

33: do you think anyone has feelings for you? i sure hope so

34: has anyone ever told you you have pretty eyes? yes

35: say the last person you kissed was kissing someone right in front of you? i'd be very sad

36: were you single on valentines day? no

37: are you friends with the last person you kissed? i like to think i am

38: what do your friends call you? my name or nickname usually

39: has anyone upset you in the last week? a bit

40: have you ever cried over a text? oh man yea

41: where’s your last bruise located? idk

42: what is it from? idk

43: last time you wanted to be away from somewhere really bad? school

44: who was the last person you were on the phone with? my boyfriend or my mom

45: do you have a favourite pair of shoes? my black doc martens and green chuck taylors

46: do you wear hats if your having a bad hair day? i'll sometimes wear a beanie

47: would you ever go bald if it was the style? i dont think so

48: do you make supper for your family? sometimes

49: does your bedroom have a door? yes

50: top 3 web-pages? weird questions

51: do you know anyone who hates shopping? probably

52: does anything on your body hurt? everything really

53: are goodbyes hard for you? yea

54: what was the last beverage you spilled on yourself? warm almond milk lol

55: how is your hair? short and curly

56: what do you usually do first in the morning? shower

57: do you think two people can last forever? i kind of hope so but sadly probably not

58: think back to january 2007, were you single? yeah lol

59: green or purple grapes? green

60: when’s the next time you will give someone a big hug? idk maybe tomorrow

61: do you wish you were somewhere else right now? kind of wish i was with him

62: when will be the next time you text someone? tomorrow morning

63: where will you be 5 hours from now? still in my bed

64: what were you doing at 8 this morning. getting ready for school

65: this time last year, can you remember who you liked? no.

66: is there one person in your life that can always make you smile? rn yes

67: did you kiss or hug anyone today? yess

68: what was your last thought before you went to bed last night? i dont remember

69: have you ever tried your hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end? yes

70: how many windows are open on your computer? idk

71: how many fingers do you have? ten i think

72: what is your ringtone? some apple shit

73: how old will you be in 5 months? almost eighteen

74: where is your mum right now? in her bed probably

75: why aren’t you with the person you were first in love with or almost in love? because sometimes things simply go to shit

76: have you held hands with somebody in the past three days? yes!

77: are you friends with the people you were friends with two years ago? not all of them but a lot of them yea

78: do you remember who you had a crush on in year 7? i guess

79: is there anyone you know with the name mike? yes

80: have you ever fallen asleep in someones arms? yes

81: how many people have you liked in the past three months? one, maybe two ig

82: has anyone seen you in your underwear in the last 3 days? no

83: will you talk to the person you like tonight? done

84: you’re drunk and yelling at hot guys/girls out of your car window, you’re with? my friend adele probably lol

85: if your bf/gf was into drugs would you care? he is but i dont mind bc i am too, idc as long as he is responsible and reasonable about his use source and frequency etc

86: what was the most eventful thing that happened last time you went to see a movie? we kissed, wow

87: who was your last received call from? boyfriend

88: if someone gave you $1,000 to burn a butterfly over a candle, would you? wtf??

89: what is something you wish you had more of? time

90: have you ever trusted someone too much? i've always trusted him a bit too much it scares me

91: do you sleep with your window open? sometimes

92: do you get along with girls? oh man yes

93: are you keeping a secret from someone who needs to know the truth? kind of

94: does sex mean love? no

95: you’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, is that a problem? no thats great lol

96: have you ever kissed anyone with a lip ring? ya

97: did you sleep alone this week? yes :(

98: everybody has somebody that makes them happy, do you? i think so.

99: do you believe in love at first sight? in a way, maybe not deep love but some sort of chemistry or attachment from some initial infatuation

100: who was the last person that you pinky promise? i dont do that very often

[deafeningcreationperson-blog]

Alton New Hampshire Cheap car insurance quotes zip 3809

"Alton New Hampshire Cheap car insurance quotes zip 3809

Alton New Hampshire Cheap car insurance quotes zip 3809

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How much car liability insurance should a person have for complete coverage without over insureing?

I need car insurance help... now......?

ok... i was thinking of getting insurance on a 1998 5 door ford fiesta 1300cc.... i am 18 (male) and only had my full license a few months... trying to get an answer out of any insurance company is..MURDER.. i go through pages of junk just to click get quote and then there is a list of 50 questions... i need... an... estimate... i dont wanna see ONE link to another website... speak in numbers please =]... and... state if it is monthly or yearly!!... because i got answers that say... 1000... and im like... is that a month =o??.... so yer... average or estimate insurance for me!!... gee thx =].... i feel this is in clear violation of the age discrimination act but warever....

Driving Someone Else's Car...Do I need Insurance?

Okay lets say that I have my license but I don't have car. If I have a friend or a family that lets me drive their car and I get into accident...who's fault would it be? Mines or the owner's? And If I do drive someone else's car..do I need insurance to pay for the owner's car if I accidentally damage their car? Or no?

Question about car insurance?

k so im 16 and im about 2 get my license but im not getting my car yet but i heard that my mother would have to put me under her insurance in order for me to drive her car since im a minor or something like that is it true

""Getting my new car, Challenger 2009, any insurance rates?""

How much would the APPROXIMATE insurance rate be on a 2009 Dodge Challenge R/T? I know it won't be low, but it won't be that high since it's an American car....correct? Her is the bad part...My record. 2 Accidents and a stop sign...But i will turn 18 soon if that matters. Car Info (another bad thing) 5.7 Liter V8 Hemi, 375 horses. How much is the Approximate insurance guys, just throw me an estimate.""

Florida Home insurance help?

I was recently dropped from my insurance company.My credit is bad so no one will cover me what should I do? I will also need flood insurance.

17 Year Old Female.. car and insurance?

Hey, I am currently searching around for a car and insurance. I have just passed my test. Using price comparison sites insurance is coming to around 1,500 pounds on cars such as Daewoo Matiz, Volkswagen Polo, Vauxhall Corse and Peugeot 106. On the internet a girl said she was able to get her insurance down to 600 pounds! How is this possible? Insurance with my mom as the named driver is about 2,000 so this isnt an option. Thanks x""

How much does flood insurance cost?

How much does flood insurance cost, as well as wind insurance?""

Someone who knows car insurance accident?

If you have your underage (but legal) child under your insurance car policy and they get into an accident or hopefully nothing worse, can you as a parent be sued. Since you are the covering parent? (and also if you remove them, will this accident be permanently on your record that the child has had?""

Are we still to be free enough to decide we don't want health insurance?

http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/wireStory?id=4235304 Scary, no? And it was, believe it or not, worse to watch the absolute calmness in which she declared willingness to decide this type of thing for us. If I don't want health insurance, or if I have enough $$$ to pay cash up front for all my bills, I don't want someone telling me I have to spend my money on their program. It's bad enough they spend my tax money stupidly, now this? What say you all?""

Will my Car Insurance Go up?

ok so im 17, i got my lisence last week.. well like 6 days ago to be exact and we all know winter driving is alot more dangerous than regular driving.. anyways i was driving home from work, and none of the country roads were plowed, as always.. i turned the corner in my moms car (im insured) and the car slid and went right into the ditch at the side of the road, so i called my dad he came and helped me pull the car out, but during that process, the car got stuck up against a wooden street sign and well crushed or indented part of the car right behind right side wheel. and once we finally got the car out, we noticed the alignment of the back axel was completely f**ked. so i drove it home very slowly, cause it was driving horrible from that.. just wondering if we report this to our insurance company what will happen? will my insurance go up? it was a complete accident and no police were involved. i dont know how much the damages will cost but im sure its not too cheap.. maybe a complete writeoff? the car was bought for 10000$ like 4 or 5 years ago. damages are: rear axel and front by right tire. can anyone reply? id just like to get this off my back i dont see how it can be my fault, the city did not have the roads properly plowed.. i know i cant blame it on that but it really was an accident i dont know how i can make it up to my parents, i work part time and goto hgihschool i dont make nearly enough money to pay for the damages they want me to.""

Can I lose my job for not having insurance?

I have heard so many different things. But I called my job today and I found out that they are offering insurance but it is to high to buy for me because it would cost $30 per week. ...show more

Can I get a ticket for not having a Massachusetts' car insurance after moved from out of state?

Can I get a ticket for not having a Massachusetts' car insurance after moved from out of state? My car is covered by Texas' car insurance right now, how soon do I have to switch it? What is the fine for not having a Mass' car insurance?""

Alton New Hampshire Cheap car insurance quotes zip 3809

Alton New Hampshire Cheap car insurance quotes zip 3809

Car accident and they got old insurance.?

I got in a car accident last November and they tried to hit me with 6 duis with no evidence. We got the FDLC results 6 MONTHS LATER, and it came up with nothing. I have no idea what they had to charge me with 6 DUIs, however... It was reduced to reckless driving. Anyways, when I got in the accident, I left in an ambulance. The police gave out the wrong car insurance (I had just got statefarm the day before.) They gave like esurance to everyone, which was the WRONG insurance. So, I ended up having to tell the hospitals etc that they gave out the wrong insurance. Then I got a call from one of the people I hit's insurance, and they queried about what insurance I had (They said the policy they were given expired in like 08.)... Part of the deal of reckless driving is that I pay restitution. My lawyer is unaware that the police gave out the wrong insurance, but he told me that there should be like nothing (insurance should cover all of it.) I just got a letter in the mail yesterday saying that I owe 2500 to some person. Is it possible that he was given the wrong insurance as well, thus me getting charged for this?""

How much does the car insurance cost every month for a 17 y/o teenager here in US in texas?

with a 2005 neon dodge car? help coz my cousin is goin to get a car this summer. thankx guys

Can u get insurance on a different address to your licence?

Say i live in leeds but my friend lives in bradford and my insurance works out cheaper on their address. Can i ge insurance to her address even though i do not live there?

Are fire insurance mandatory in California(near Los angeles)?

If a house is all paid for, is fire insurance still mandatory? If your house catches on fire and gets completely burned down, when does fire insurance pay you? Also how does fire insurance determine how much to pay you?""

How to get Cheap Car Insurance at 17?

Hello, I have tried everything to get chear car insurance at 17 but it seems to stay in the 2500+ Area.... How can I get it cheaper? I have had my license for a month but feel frustrated that I can't get a car because the insurance is too high!! Can anyone help?""

Use Medisave to Buy a Life Insurance?

Use Medisave to Buy a Life Insurance! Is this a wise choice?

Can My brother and I go under the same car insurance?

Can I get my name in his car too? In other words, could we both have our name under the insurance? Would this raise insurance? What would happen if one of us wrecks it?""

Affordable health insurance?

I'm nineteen years old and I don't have health insurance. I'm going to be a college student in the fall. I was wondering if anyone had any idea how I could find good, affordable health insurance? Also some help as to how the whole co-pay thing works would help out, too. I used to have a certain health insurance for people from low-income families but they just cut mine off so I need to get some. Thanks in advance!""

Full coverage insurance for a 350z in Cali?

Age: 26 Started: 16 2005 Nissan 350z 85k miles How much in general (ball park) would it be for insurance for this car in California? so many insurance places have you go through tons of crap and then get swamped with junk mail, I'd rather just get a ballpark estimate.""

How much is car insurance for a 16 year old?

I am a male and I will drive a 91 crx si . none of my parents have caused an accident.

Car insurance student help?

Hey guys, I want to ask, is it possible to get a Mini Cooper convertible with car insurance. I'm 20 and I passed my test in November 2012. I'm planning to buy a mini but will they let me have the insurance ? All answers would be very helpful, thank you X""

Anyone ever in a car accident & break a bone? Wrist? How much did the insurance compnay pay you?

I broke my scaphoid bone in my wrist due to a car accident. I would like to be prepared when it comes down to the settlement. I was wondering if anyone else had the same thing happen. I am right handed and it's my left wrist. the accident was not my fault. other party's company is accepting fault too.

""If a male at the age of 20 started driving, would the cost of insurance be cheaper then it would for him at 16?""

If a male at the age of 20 started driving, would the cost of insurance be cheaper then it would for him at 16?""

Do judges call in to verify your car insurance?

I was just curious if you are sent to court for driving without proof of insurance if the judge in court calls into the insurance to verify it. If it helps I live in Illinois. Just curious I'm trying to prove something to a friend.

How to get my baby health insurance?

So I am having a baby within the next few months. I am covered under my dad's health insurance because I am still under 26. I don't live with my dad though. I currently live with my fiance and my one year old son. My son is on fidelis/medicaid. Is there any way I can get my baby covered before I deliver her?

How do I get rid of my car insurance?

I've got insurance on my car, but I am looking to cancel it. And I would like to cancel it without really having to explain myself to the company, seeing as they will want some sort of proof that I've for instance changed to a different company. I will be moving out the country come autumn, and I can't bring the bills with me for when I move away. It will cost too much, and no one will be driving the car anyway. Anyone have any suggestions on how I can cancel it?""

Insurance Problems for my Teenage Self?(;?

So I found out that insurance for the car I was going to get (Honda Civic EX-L 2010) was way too much since I'm only 16. So I'm planning on getting a cheaper car, around $5,000. 1. Will insurance be much cheaper? They told me $1,500 for the Civic. 2. When I do turn 18 and purchase my dream car, will the insurance drop? If so how muh?""

Will my insurance rate go up for this careless?

i was driving down the road day after we got all that snow in december i hit a mail box and went in a really shallow ditch ..couldnt get out... left my car there for the night thinking it would be ok... in the morning car wasnt there so called o.p.p they said ya they have my car they just wanted to talk lol so i go thre he wrote me up a carless and leaving seen of accident ..he asked wanna go through insurance i replied no i will pay for the mail box myself which i did. no one was hurt only the mailbox...the carless was a 490.00 fine.. does anyone know how much my rate would go up just for a silly little careless like that??

Insurance on a 92 Vtec honda prelude?

approx. what would insurance on a 92 Vtec Honda prelude be for a Canadian 17 year old guy with with a successfully drivers education course completed? and if possible what would be the cheapest place to go for my insurance?

My car got hit in the middle of the night. I don't have insurance but the person at fault does.?

I woke up yesterday to find my car hit and another car, with temp tags, abandoned up the road (it had a lot of damage to the front of it, so it was obviously the one that hit mine.) Today the officer who came yesterday called and had found the person at fault and gave me all of their information. I don't have insurance currently, and my car will cost a few $100 to repair, so what can I do with this info?""

""Where can I find affordable dental insurance, that I can use immediatleywith no waiting period?

Im in the state of VIRGINIA :)

Insurance company would not like to insure me a sole proprietorship?

I am a film major, a student and very involved in different projects. I decided to open my own film company a sole proprietorship, meaning I DBA (Do Business As). I am looking for liability insurance for my business for wedding and events. They asked me if I was doing any other type of work currently. My reponse was that yes I am involved in being cameraman for one project and editor for another. I have not signed a contract or getting paid for any of these projects, simply volunteer. They came back stating that if they were to insurance me, I as an invidividual would no longer be able to be part of any project or post anything of my personal stuff on youtube. I understand that they are trying to protect themselves and that they are insuring me personally I guess since its a DBA. Has anyone else come upon this problem? I see many videographer put their stuff up on vimeo, youtube etc.""

Best car insurance company in 2013?

I am looking for a new car insurance company. My current one is charging me $2500/year for 2 cars.

What is the cheapest car insurance for someone who has tickets?

(male, living in sacramento, ca)""

Do U think it's fair women's insurance is cheaper because they have an 'innie' and men have an 'outie'?

I see just as many women being careless drivers as men. Why should their sex organs have anything to do with car insurance?

Alton New Hampshire Cheap car insurance quotes zip 3809

Alton New Hampshire Cheap car insurance quotes zip 3809

Is this car insurance company good?

http://www.4youngdrivers.co.uk/ I got a very reasonable quote of 1,500 a year from that website whereas everywhere else the minimum I could find is 4,700 to insure my dad's bmw 325i under my name ( he bought a new 5 series). But the downside to this is that the excess fee to any claim is 3,000. Either way it is cheaper than most insurance companies so what do you think of the company? because Iv never heard of it before and it does sound a bit fishy. In case it helps...im 24 and have been driving a gsxr750 for 2 years until last november during the snow I was involved in a horrifying crash which ended up my bike being written off.""

Adding child to car insurance policy?

I was looking up insurance for myself its 900+ for six month which I expected but if my mom adds me to hers will it be any cheaper?

When to get health insurance for your newborn?

I am in my first trimester and just wondering when do I need to get health insurance for my newborn-the health insurance is United Healthcare and offered through my job

On average how much is horse insurance for a 5yr old 16hh Thoroughbred Show Jumper for example?

I'm trying to calculate expanses for when I get my own horse. I will most likely be getting a Thoroughbred around 5 to 8 years of age. I will have him/her for Show Jumping purposes including competing. On average how much will insurance cost for this horse?

Question about health insurance?

I went to the ER in late May and I recently got promoted so I applied for health insurance. However, my health insurance does not go into effect til July. I was told by the hospital that I will be billed in about 2 -3 months. Is there anyway I can use my insurance for the bill or will I have to pay out of pocket?""

""When you get car insurance, is it the car itself that's insured, the person, or...?

does each person in the household have to get insurance for each car they use?

Price for insurance for car?

i am looking to buy a car for around 2000 dollars. its a dodge dakota not sure the year between 1995-1999. but how much am i looking at to pay monthly if i create my own insurance plan?

""How much is Insurance on Fireworks up to $2,000,000.00 in Maine?""

Thinking about opening up a Fireworks shop and want to know how much I'm looking at a year for insurance need a policy with the min $2,000,000.00.""

How much will my insurance inflate?

Okay so this is my first year driving and my insurance was about $1100-1200. I was backing out and someone was in my blind spot so I hit the side of his car. My car had no damages but unfortunately I caused a slight dent in his, it wasn't that serious but it was still noticable. How much will insurance go up now that I've had my first accident that was completely my fault?""

Insurance payments on a car?

Okay so to start off i am 16 as of today. I will get my permit today and in one year I will turn 17. I will then have my license. So when I turn 17 i will be able to buy my own car with a $5000 down payment with the choice of a car. But here is where I am stuck. I do not know too much on information on car insurance. I know that I will be under my parents policy from here until I am 17. Lets say that there is 5 of us under this car insurance, no one has a separate policy, all under one umbrella. What happens when I buy a car, I get insured with a new car, my own car, and still under the policy things with my family. How much is it going to be per month? Can you average it? Here is a list of cars I will choose from, and if you can, provide estimated prices per month I will have to pay. - (2008-2010) BMW 3 Series Sedan (No mods or extra horsepower, plain performance) - (2006-2011) Mazda RX-8 Coupe (same, no mods or any fancy performance stuff) - (2008-2011) Mazda 3 or MazdaSpeed3 (sedan) - (2008-2011) Volkswagen Jetta (sedan) - (2008-2011) Subaru Impreza (hatchback) Also I am an A-B student with an above 3.5 GPA Also I will take a drivers ed course at school""

Car Insurance.?

My dad doesnt want to put me on his insurance, even though i offered to pay and my mom is gonna buy me the car. Male, 16, the car is probably going to be a 2001, 2-door honda. What is an estimated amount am I going to have to pay if I get my own car insurance.""

How much would I pay for car insurance?

I am a male, 24 years old (turn 25 in july), student.... what is the cheapest car insurance you think I can get?""

""Insurance whilst working In italy for 7 months for an aussie company, anyone got any good recommendations?

My job is travelling around I already have basic Travel Insurance

How can I take out life insurance on another person?

My father owes me money and I owe alot of money because of him. I'd like to be able to take out life insurance on him incase he dies before he pays me back. How would I go about doing this? I'm trying to figure out how to take the insurance out on him (since he owes me). Not have him get life insurance and then make me the benifactor himself.

Insurance and having a baby?

If you already had a huge medical expense on your insurance recently, is it going to be a problem with insurance covering the medical expenses for having a baby? I am not too familiar with insurance stuff, but I was just wondering.""

Why do sompanies like State Farm require you to pass a credit check?

What are they looking for because I do have a few things like a medical bill here and there but nothing more than 5,000 total""

Average cost for home owner insurance ?

Average cost for home owner insurance ?

Is falling asleep at the wheel covered by car insurance?

no other cars or persons were involved

What percent of term life insurance policies pay out?

I want to leave some money for my children once I am gone. Is it better to buy a Term Life Insurance policy or to invest that money where it will earn interest? What are the odds of a Term Life Insurance Policy paying out? What percent pay out? I'm thinking it is probably very low. So I am leaning more toward investing the money instead of using it to pay premiums. It seems insurance is more of a gamble than an investment. I don't want to give my money to an insurance company for 20 years and have my children get nothing in the end. Can someone with knowledge of the insurance industry please give me a straight answer to this?

Help Car Insurance help?

Im 16 and im gettin a 2003 cadillac CTS when i get my licences and i have a few questions. The car is $10,932 how much would the down payment be also how much monthly plus insurance?""

My first car notes and insurance?

i'm 16 and plan on getting A JOB BY MAY 2008. I wanna buy a USED CAR at least a 1997 model -2000 model. Do you think I can afford the car note? Could i possibly get on my mom's insurance plan to make it cheaper for my car to be insured or am I just putting myself up for a future of bad credit??????

I have had my car broken into and had my pc stolen HOW DO I CLAIM INSURANCE?

earlier this afternoon i had to take my desktop pc to pcworld to be fixed but came home with it straight away due to them sending an engineer out to my home to fix it, Anyhow heavy rain started upon getting home so i left the computer in the car so it wouldnt get wet, CAN I CLAIM ON MY CAR INSURANCE FOR A NEW COMPUTER?????????""

Cost of getting motorcycle insurance for 20 year old?

I am probably goin to get a sports bike. I have had my license since I was 18. I have no tickets and clean driving record. I currently pay $140 a month for insurance on my truck. I was looking into getting a bike older than 2003. How much will motorcycle insurance be for a sports bike?

For Lexus owners: Is it expensive to maintain a Lexus?

Don't bother with saying, If you are thinking about buying a Lexus, you should be able to maintain it. If not, shop for something else. I love the Lexus IS design, both outside and inside. And I'd love to get myself one of these beautiful cars. However, before I take one of these cars in my driveway, I want to make certain I am not making a mistake. These are the questions I want you to answer: 1. I heard the price for one tire is $300... Is this true? If no, how much does one of these tires cost? 2. I heard the price for oil change is $110. If this is not true, how much does it cost you for oil change? 3. I heard if either the front bumper or rear bumper needs replacement, the cost would be $5000. If this is not true, how much do you think a bumper replacement should cost? 4. Although the amount you pay for car insurance is based on your driving history, I heard that the quality of a car does play a major role. I am 27. So, in your opinion, how much do you think I will pay for car insurance for the 06 Lexus IS 250? My driving history has a clean record. I have yet to receive a ticket. 5. What other things I need to know about owning one of these cars? Please answer my question.""

How do i go about getting sr-22 insurance?

i live in new mexico, and i'm sure it varies a little form state to state, but can you tell me the process you went through and possibly what kind of increase in insurance rates im looking at?""

Alton New Hampshire Cheap car insurance quotes zip 3809

Alton New Hampshire Cheap car insurance quotes zip 3809

Is it high insurance for a fiat 500?

i am a 17 year old girl and i was ust looking at the fiat 500 and i just want to know if the insurance is really high for them. I know the average is about 2000 for a 17 year old, so would anyone be able to give me an idea on price please. thanks for the help""

Best health insurance for a 63 year old male?

My dad retired at 62 and a half... to make a long story short, he was promised continuing health insurance from his employer but now they are saying they will only be secondary- meaning they only pay if he buys a primary. What would be a good option for health insurance for him? Unfortunately, he is a smoker and had a stroke... he is 63 and a half right now.""

How do I go about this? Car insurance for myself and get the car in my name?

My mom is giving me her old car. She has it in her name, and I want to put it in my own name with my own car insurance. I'm moving out so this is the reason for it. I live in Florida.""

Where to find affordable complete health insurance?

i am looking fior affordable health insurance, like as in family. i am looking online, but so far have come up with nothing. they are dropping my insurance at work, so i need to find something. if i have to go online to find it, that is ok.""

Getting a check from both insurance companies?

I recently got in a car accident, and both insurance companies (mine & the other party's) sent me a check to cover the damages, each check is enough to cover the full damage. What should I do? a. Use check from other party's insurance, and return the one from my insurance company. b. Use check from my insurance company, and return the one from the other party's. c. Keep both checks""

Car Insurance?

I am just trying to get some quotes on maybe what my car insurance would be. I don't have the kind of car that I want yet but I was just trying to get an estimate and check and see what it would be around.. Can I get any quotes without the Vin Number?

Motorcycle insurance in ontario?

Im 21 years old and im looking for cheap motorcycle insurance in ontario. Any suggestions?

Car insurance?

how much can it increase by having one point on your driving record?

Why is insurance coverage for a 2011 Mazda 2 cheaper than a 2007 Ford Focus or Hyundai Elantra?

I just got quotes for a new Mazda 2. Full coverage on the Mazda 2 will increase my total premium by $163. Full coverage quote for a 2007 Focus would be $187 increase. Full coverage quote for a Hyundai Elantra would result in a $176 increase. I find this very surprising. I thought used cars were supposed to result in cheaper insurance coverage.

Big hoo ha over teenaged car insurance?

Might take a while... Basically the people in my year at school are all at an age where were starting to learn to drive, and also talking about getting our own cars (those who can afford it) Some people are going to get their cars, and pretend that their parents are the main drivers just to make the insurance cheaper, however others are saying that insurance companies can actually catch you doing this. It makes sense that they should be able to as it is fraud, i was just wondering though, does anyone know HOW they actually do this? Is it if you make a claim? Or do they actually track where the car is going and from that work out who is driving it? Just thought i would ask to try and clear up this huge grey area, personally i am not planning to get a car as i cannot afford to have insurance with just me on the car and i dont want to screw over my mums insurance forever should we get caught pretending it is hers so do not start having a go at me as if i am going to try and cheat the system. I am literally just wondering how it is done. Thanks.""

Rover75 rear hit by a 4x4. Garage says not repairable what do I do? how much will the insurance pay?

The 4x4 damaged the rear end of my Rover 75, impossible to shut boot and lights not working. The garage and insurance now say it is not repairable. - but even after the accident, the car was driving perfectly. How much will the insurance company pay? Will they? Is there any way I can get the car fixed?""

Health Insurance Policies For Smokers?

How are health insurance policies for smokers differ from that for non smokers?

""I have been quoted at 683 for car insurance, is this all it will cost?""

I'm 17, male, so I was expecting expensive insurance (not fair lol!) when I put my details in all the others were quoting at around 1,800 but the first one Quinn direct quoted ...show more""

How much will my insurance go up approximately after I totaled my car?

I totaled my 2009 pontiac G6. I was the only party involved. I was going about 30 in a 25 zone and the road was snowy. I hit ice and slid up over a curb. I had previously been in an accident in 2009 in my moms vechile. We share insurance and i am 19 soon to be 20.

Insurance on my boyfriend's car?

I recently got my license and haven't gotten a car yet. Since my boyfriend has two vehicles I am planning on using his car for work. He has liability on the car but I don't have any insurance and his insurance agent isn't sure if we can be on the same policy if we're not living together. Will I have to get my own insurance or is there anyway I can be covered by his policy? Please help! Any advice on the cheapest way to do this is appreciated. Thank you!

""Has anyone heard of this company Affordable Health & Benefits, LLC.?""

I'm looking to get health, dental, and vision insurance. I looked online at a couple sites and found this one. It looks really good but I'm a little worried it might be a scam ...show more""

Do you get cheaper insurance if you drive less miles to school?

if i lie and tell them i drive barely any miles to school would it be cheaper? its 87 a month right now but imma tell them scool is like a 2 mile drive

CHEAPEST CAR INSURANCE FOR 21YO?

I'M 21 YO HAVE HAD MY LICENCE SINCE 16 WITH NO ACCIDENTS OR TICKETS AND WANT TO INSURE MY CAR FOR THE FIRST TIME ON MY OWN WHAT'S A CHEAP CAR INSURANCE?

How much of my 18 yr. old son's paycheck should I take from him?

My son got his first job at McDonalds. He is living at home. I want to take a percentage of his pay and put it aside for his car insurance, etc.. I can't see him just blowing his whole paycheck on junk. What percentage do you think is fair?""

Multi Car discount on car insurance ?

Can any insurance agents out there please tell me - roughly what % discount on the total policy premium would I get if I qualified for the mulit-car discount on my car insurance policy? I am with State Farm if that matters at all. I am currently at $400 every 6 months for my pickup truck & am wondering if we add another car in our household onto the SF car insurance, how much would I save on the $400 every 6 month truck premium? Thanks very much.""

Ways to make car insurance cheaper?

I know this question or something similar has been asked a lot but i'm 18 and i've just passed my driving test and i'm looking for insurance. I have 2000 saved up and all the quotes i've been given are around this, I know i'm not going to get it much cheaper than this. Does ringing up the insurer and saying you've been given a cheaper like for like quote etc. work in getting the price down? And what companies are recommended for younger drivers? Thanks :)""

How much does deep cleaning usually cost?

My pocket size was 2 or 3 and some of my molars were 4 or 5. So I know I do need deep cleaning. I did half of my mouth already which is $200 and I'm going to do the other side which also cost $200. So I'm paying $400 overall. I have good insurance through my dad so I didn't have insurance it would be Around $1800. It just seems so expensive

Adding someone to ur insurance?

i know ur insurance goes up but do have to pay the difference between the new and old price? or do u just pay the new price whenever it would normally be time to pay ur insurance?

Question about car insurance?

I know it's a broad question - but what is the average rate for car insurance for someone over 25 who is a safe driver?? Also is it possible for your car insurance to drop $100 in 6 months??

I need help with sending to cancelled auto insurance policies stating we have new companies and lower rates.?

Its an auto insurance company trying to win back cancelled policies.

Alton New Hampshire Cheap car insurance quotes zip 3809

Alton New Hampshire Cheap car insurance quotes zip 3809

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/pontiac-grand-am-gt-insurance-james-mcneil/"

[stardustandcatpaws-blog]

five

It has really been a really long time since I have written anything. I noticed, right now actually, that my self esteem has been gradually getting lower since I stopped giving myself compliments everyday. I will start again tomorrow. However, right now, this writing session is for reflection. 

About 6 months ago, I had a stalker. Almost immediately after/in the midst of dealing with my stalker, I got an emotionally abusive boyfriend. 4 months after that, I found out I had a pretty sever ulcer and cancer and broke up with my boyfriend. 1 month after that I got a surgery to remove my cancer, incurred a lot of debt from surgery, loans, taxes, etc., met the man of my dreams (or so he seems now) and have had approximately ZERO time to reflect and deal with all of it. SO, here it is:

The stalker (he has a name but it makes me sick to think about him so...), was a guy I dated who lived in a city, approximately one hour from my current city in Korea. We met through a language exchange app. I wanted to learn Korean and he wanted to learn English. After a few times of language exchange he asked me on a date; he seemed nice and charming so I said, yes. We dated from May to July, last year. He was a nice guy, seemingly intelligent, good goals (wanting to get further in the police force), healthy, worked out a lot, etc. HOWEVER, I cant tell you what it was exactly that made me question being with him, but my gut instinct just told me to stop dating him. We stopped dating (I cant really say broke up because we weren’t boyfriend and girlfriend) and he WENT INSANE!

I am a nice person when I break up with someone: I listen to them, apologize but remain firm, explain my feelings over and over again and I am patient for a few days.... however, with him, I would tell him we are broken up and he would just laugh and not take me seriously. He showed up at my house multiple times, called my friends, spammed my inboxes on every social media. Usually men do that for a while after you break up with some hope of getting back together, however after a couple days you just ignore them and they give up and move on. NOT THIS TIME. I think it took me 2 full weeks to realize I had a full blown stalker. He would come to my house, unannounced, every day. He would leave gifts outside my door and make up fake messenger accounts to talk to me and send virtual gifts after I blocked him. My friend Matt called the police for me 4 times to complain about the stalker because I would go to him crying every time I received another message or gift.

For the first month it was more annoying than it was scary. The police were not much help, as I am an English foreigner and they are Korean police officers. It was quite hard to communicate and convince them I really had a stalker. I think it was one month into the stalking, after the 3rd phone call to the police that I became genuinely scared; terrified actually.  He showed up at my house with flowers and a letter. He stayed outside for hours and would message me online saying things like, “I know you’re in there,” “The police can’t do anything to me, I know the law.” We called the police and when they arrived to speak to him in person I thought, finally this will be taken care of. I watched through the window of my friends apartment, the police talked to him for 2 hours. Finally, it was finished! WRONG. Before even getting into a taxi to take himself home, he sent me a picture of the flowers he had bought me and sent me a very long message describing all of the places he is going to take me after he buys a car, where our new house will be, what our children will be like, etc. I knew he was dangerous at that point.

Thankfully, I live in an apartment building with other people I work with so they could tell me if he came back to the apartment. For 2 weeks after the last incident with the roses, it was fairly calm. A message here and there from fake accounts but no in person sightings. I thought he was calming down, but then I received a letter at work. It was a 5 page hand written letter in English, describing every part of my body in detail and things he wanted to do me. There were some really disgusting things he said about me but the scariest one for me was when he mentioned multiple times that he can’t wait until I am pregnant so he can take care of me better. It was quite repulsive. 2 days letter I received 2 more letters in my home mail box. The contents of these letters were similar to the first. 

1 week after the letter incident, I was moving into another apartment upstairs because I didn’t want him to have my address. After moving some furniture upstairs, I went downstairs to my old apartment to get another load of stuff and there he was; my stalker just standing in my old apartment. I didnt think he would ever come back after talking to the police. Apparently I was wrong. I still remember the sick feeling I got when I saw him. When he saw me standing in the doorway, he said, “Ill forgive you for calling the police.” In that moment my instincts told me to just stay calm and not make him angry by yelling or running away. To this day, I have still never seen him angry. He has such an eerie calmness about him. He started a casual conversation, asking about my day and I just said I was moving and forgot something upstairs so I had to go get it and we will talk when I get back down. He started following me upstairs and I had no idea what to do but in that moment MY FRIEND WHO LIVED UPSTAIRS CAME DOWN AND SAW HIM. THANK GOD FOR COLLIN! Already knowing about my stalker and what I was going through, my friend and him started getting into an argument. Another friend heard what was going on in the hallway and called the police. He left before he could get arrested.

In the week that followed I filed a real police report for breaking and entering as well as stalking. I had a korean translator (also my friend) at the police station so things went fairly well, minus when the detective working my case asked me out on a date (WTF!). It was finally over, or so I thought. It takes time for someone to be charged and arrested so he was free to do as he pleased until the police got around to taking care of the situation. 

2 weeks after I filed the report, my frisbee team had a tournament in a city named, Pohang; maybe 2 hours away from my stalkers city. I played a few frisbee games that day and I was at the field for approximately 5 hours. I checked my phone when our tournament was over and there was a message on my instagram from a random account. The message was 3 pictures of me during the tournament, playing frisbee and a, “I will join you soon.” I was quite confused... maybe it was him? Maybe it was a joke from a fellow player? I walked off the field to find my stalker talking to the frisbee league organizer. He was trying to join frisbee!!!!!!! I was so shocked. I just blurted out, “What are you doing here?” Of course the reply was just a calm, “To join frisbee.” At this point I honestly could not handle it anymore. I was so scared!!! I cried a lot and went to find my friend Matt to fix it (he was on the same team as I was). Matt went and found my stalker and the organizer. After an aggressive conversation, I’m told, my stalker was banned from all frisbee related things. Again, I went back to the police station in Andong but nothing could be done because the other charges were still going through.

In the end Im not exactly sure what happened... I know he had to pay a fine and go to jail/do some community service. I know when they first mentioned jail time to me that he would get out in April or May... Maybe that is why I have been thinking so much about it all lately.

Being stalked by him has changed me in a lot of ways... I am scared to walk alone at night, in fear that he may be around the corner. I am scared to be in my apartment alone because I know it’s not that hard to break into someones house if you really wanted. I quit drinking when the stalking first started because I felt like it could put me at extreme risk. I just don’t go out partying anymore. There may be a time when I drink again, but it will not be in public. I found it extremely difficult to trust people before, so now it is almost impossible.  

Immediately after the stalking, I met a man. I talked about him 2 posts ago. I didnt realize it at the time but I think I just needed to be with someone to make me feel safe. It is quite ironic because thinking about it now, he is the LAST person who would care about my well being. I mentioned before, he is a narcissist. Not a narcissist in the sense people use nowadays in regards to selfishness, but a real narcissist. Having already been in shock, and not even having started recovery from my stalker, I dived into this relationship and I just believed every stupid, abusive word that came out of his mouth. There was one point when I thought we would get married. (LOL!) And then, after 4 months, I realized I was in an abusive relationship and left. I covered some of the details in another post.

After the stalking and the break up, I went to the hospital to get some tests because my stomach was quite sore. Turns out I have an ulcer and had cancer. I got surgery to get the cancer removed so that’s taken care of, but being 25 and hearing you have cancer is not fun. It is quite scary. Also I felt quite alone dealing with it. Of course, I have some friends here who have offered to go with me to appointments and listen to me when Im sad - I am truly grateful and love them for it. <3 But its still tiresome, going to all of the appointments in different cities, different hospitals, spending money you dont have, translation, etc. I considered quitting my job at one point and moving back to Canada for a while to decompress but I quickly dismissed that thought because the thought of moving anywhere with cats, canceling a contract, and flying for 33 hours just didn’t seem worth it. SO! I acted like I usually do: said the bare minimum to people about my situation, pretended like I was ok, made a few cancer jokes and moved on. Not the healthiest way to go about things but what else am I supposed to do ?

You get to this weird point (currently mid-twenties for me), when you realize as everyone gets older, they tend to focus their energy on themselves. They have their own problems, so they focus their energy on their problems and don’t get too involved in your own. As they should! I have come to the realization that no one has to care or help me deal with my problems other than myself. I know for some people this is quite an obvious observation... However, I am the kind of person who will take time out of my day to sincerely talk to you about a real problem and help you find a solution. I will be with you until the very end, using any resource or energy possible to get you through it and to make you happy again. When I found out I had cancer, I was kind of angry when people didn’t show the same kindness to me that I would have/have shown them in the past. Instead it was met with a lot of, “Well ya, my uncle had cancer,” or “Ya, that sucks.” Even I remember trying to tell some people about how alone and sad I felt and the reaction was that they offered to help or that if they were in their home country they wouldn’t have their family with them so they would also be alone, etc. I was quite upset, thinking about how dismissive my friends were to me for talking about my feelings with regards to my cancer. Thinking about it now, however, I should not have been upset with people. I think everyone has a certain capacity for the “shit they can deal with;” few people, like me, can deal with a lot of problems (my own and other people’s) and still be sane (well kind of LOL) and other people deal with just a regular amount of problems. Upon reflecting, I am happy to have friends I can at least share my problems with. I can’t expect anyone to be sincere every time because, let’s be real, I HAVE A LOT OF “SHIT” XD. Maybe at that moment in time, the dismissive reaction was due to them dealing with their own problems and using their energy in a healthy way. It is a good thing. I can learn from them. One of my major problems is always using my energy on everyone and everything, except for myself. The more I grow and the more problems I have, the more I learn that I really need to help myself heal first before I help everyone else. Much easier said then done!!! 

AHHHH. That was such a great therapy session. Im going to take a shower, cry, do a face mask and sleep for 10 hours. The last 5 years I have quite extensively focused on my past and have done MANY therapy sessions in order to heal my mind. All of a sudden, right now, I feel like it is time to close that chapter and focus on the present and future. I just FEEL like I have completed something. Tomorrow is going to be a great day! <3