#this got super long i'm sorry pls ignore that

[rockruin]

𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐑𝐎𝐋𝐄 𝐒𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐀𝐒 𝐂𝐀𝐔𝐆𝐇𝐓 𝐈𝐍 𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐋𝐋 𝐅𝐄𝐋𝐓 𝐖𝐄𝐈𝐑𝐃 𝐓𝐎 𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘. like shoes not broken in yet. daisy struggled to find the effortlessness in it — every step she’d made towards her newly rebuilt life, from the very first brick she’d laid down towards becoming not a ghost of seventies’ past but philanthropist, entrepreneur, author, mother — all of it had taken a sharp, aching effort out of her. it demanded effort: it would not concede victory unless it came in exchange for blood, sweat and tears. she measured her words now. contained her feelings, calculated her moves not out of a need for schemes, but a need to dilute her instincts: not spill out like water out of a broken dam. these days, she channeled a gentle river more than a flood — and most times she found she liked it, going with the flow, not endlessly fighting her way upstream.

ah, but some of the fire remained still: on a stage, presenting her fundraiser’s new project — not quite as electric, no guttural scream of liberation echoing from her lungs. but a certain pride glimmered in her eyes as she presented the wildflower initiative’s climate change awareness program — a spark of electricity still jolted through her when the audience applauded. 

and she knew how to work the crowd, still, though it was different now. no belting or harmonizing, but shaking hands and nodding passionately. she flowed along with it, though she looked forward to the after: the warm quiet of her home. bedtime stories for her sons. sandalwood candles burning in her room. a poetry book, a cup of tea — a comfortable stillness. still, even as she entertained mildly interesting conversations with donors and journalists — still, until she wasn't. a gust of wind suddenly breaking into her quiet. a voice, breaking into the scene, gentle but reverberating so loud in her ears: a crack of lightning.

daisy turned, breath stuck in her throat: ❝ billy ❞, she breathed out, as the world came to a halt. the past two decades had been spent carefully erasing his face from her memories — avoiding every book cover, every vh1 special, every poster in every venue she’d ever stepped in. it was almost surprising, to see him so vividly : not a ghost, not the past. just a man she’d once thought of as enemy. in the stillness of her shock, she searched silently for the blame she’d once pinned in him — searched through all of herself for the anger, the regret, all the reasons she’d piled up between her and the memory of him. in the search, what she found instead was warmth: the tender feeling of an affection returned. a certain kind of happiness.

it happened of its own accord — not quite commanded, but sprung from the most natural of chemical reactions. shocked features turning to softness, turning to joy: the brightest smile igniting her as she went to wrap her arms around him, tight — in spite of herself, out of control, taken over by the overwhelming weight of years of unsaid nothings. for seconds, seemingly endless seconds, daisy jones hugged billy dunne and it felt right, and it felt safe, and twenty years seemed pointless, they’d never really happened.

just as easily, then, she regained control of herself: stepped away, cleared her throat, dimmed her smile. but it remained — faded, controlled, but genuine. ❝ billy dunne. my god. ❞. daisy exhaled slowly. ❝ i never really thought i’d see you again ❞. distantly, she became aware of prying gazes cast on them by the rest of the audience — some recognizing, some wondering. she remained still, then smiled. ❝ this is julia’s doing, isn’t it ? ❞

Billy had to have spent half the day staring down at that invitation. rereading its contents, familiarizing himself with its material. The Wildflower Initiative… cordially invites… Julia Martinez-Dunne… to… signed, Daisy Jones, slid across the kitchen counter, before the coffee she’d put on, had even a chance to brew.  his eldest was just as pushy as her mother had been, maybe even more so. “look, Dad… I’m not saying that you should go,” she’d said, in her place, with an inclination that she’d meant the exact opposite, “all I’m saying is… who knows? you could wind up glad that ya’ did.” as if were that simple. though it’d been nearly a year since its release, the public’s attention had yet to stray from the words she’d put to paper. some of which, he never could’ve imagined he’d say aloud, let alone, have publicized, for the whole world to see, for her to see. he’d often wondered if she’d read it, Daisy, or if she, too, had only dared to skim. it’d kept him up at night, the wondering. that was the thing about fire. once mixed with gasoline, it took a whole lot more than water to extinguish. 

still, he’d yet to work up the nerve to call, to actually use her number, that Camila had set aside. what would he even say? it was this same question, that’d kept him glued to his seat, invitation is hand, as day turned to night. until it was nearly too late. 

he’d not a clue what had changed his mind, nor when he’d changed his mind, only that as he’d slipped into the shadows of the event venue, just as Daisy had appeared on stage, to thank everyone for coming, he felt that his heart might just burst through the stuffy, suit jacket, he’d thought to throw on, as he was half-way out the door, and that, later, as he’d approached bright, red curls, from behind, he’d paid no mind to the stragglers who’d watched, as he did. “you never did have much trouble drawing a crowd,” had shattered the last twenty years of silence, his lips, nearly, resembling a smile. 

@rockruin.

[ellecdc]

babe I recently discovered ur account and now I'm obsessed!!!!! I have devoured ur masterlist! Also I'm new to tumblr so I'm sorry if I'm doing or saying anything wrong pls correct me! I just wanna hype u up queen! Also ok fic request! It's not smut it's smut adjacent! I imagine this with Remus but u can totally change it if u want! Imagine reader whose boobs get super sore before her period and may be Remus is trying to initiate sex like they r making out and he goes to touch her boob and she winces and he's like did I just hurt u? And she's like no no it's fine and may be he believes her but he touches her again and she flinches and he's just like what is wrong don't lie and it's that her ex never cared if her boobs hurt or sex sad painful before her period and just Remus love (sorry it's so long def self indulgent bc my boobs r super sore and sex kinda hurts leading up my period and I just want someone to understand and not make me feel guilty about it)

aawweeee so glad you found me! and thanks for the prompt, lovie <3

Remus Lupin x fem!reader whose boobs are sore close to her period [1.4k words]

CW: things get sort of steamy/lead up to smut with no real smut, sexual & non-sexual nudity, mature themes, 18+

You couldn’t help the smile that took over your face when you heard Remus navigating the hall in a way you could tell he thought to be quiet before his head of messy, tawny brown curls appeared in the crack of your bedroom door.

“Hi dove.” He murmured softly as if still unsure if you were asleep or not; his eyes were warm and sweet as honey as he smiled widely and unbiddenly at you.

“Hi handsome.” You greeted in return as you put your book down and invited him in which he accepted eagerly.

“Fuck, I missed you.” He moaned as he crawled up into the bed and melted into you; arms weasingly around your middle as he shoved his face into the crook of your neck greedily. 

“Missed me?” You laughed as you threaded your fingers through his hair. “You were hardly gone three hours.”

“S’too long.” He mumbled, earning him a giggle as you tried to pull away at the tickle of his breath against your neck.

He groaned somewhat hungrily as he pulled you in tighter, beginning to trace kisses up the column of your throat.

You tightened your grip of his hair which only seemed to spur him on as he shifted so he was hovering over half of you. 

“Didn’t you miss me?” He asked under his breath before bringing his lips to yours for an agonisingly long and slow kiss. “Hm?” He continued as if he hadn’t just impeded your ability to answer him. 

“I always miss you, Rem.” You murmured back as he began marking kisses along your jaw and trailing towards your chest. 

He made a sympathetic sound as he got to the top of the tank top you usually slept in, hooking his finger along the neckline and pulling it out of his way to expose your - quite swollen, actually - tits. 

“Neither of us should ever be allowed to leave.” He concurred, switching between wet, open mouthed kisses and sucking love bites into your exposed skin. 

“Don’t you think your friends would miss you?” You asked then, thoroughly enjoying the show as you continued to mess with his hair. 

“Tough.” He said simply before moving his hand to cup one of your breasts to lift it into his mouth, causing you to suck in a pained breath.

All movements stopped and Remus seemed to be holding his breath as his eyes flit up to yours. “You okay, sweetheart?” He asked cautiously.

You let out the breath you didn’t realise you’d been holding and nodded at him. “Yeah, sorry, I’m fine.” You agreed, trying to ignore how painfully sensitive your boobs were this close to your period as you encouraged his face back down to your chest.

With only a little hesitation, he continued his ministrations before moving over to your other to bestow upon it the same amount of care. 

You could feel him growing hard as he repositioned himself in your lap, and you tried to focus on that slightly warm feeling trying to grow between your legs (though not nearly as effectively as it had been the week prior) and his pleasure as you allowed him to take from you what he pleased.

But one more firm grasp of your tit had you wincing with a small whine and a flip was switched.

Remus was kneeling; his hands no longer on you which only made you wince in embarrassment rather than pain as he scrutinised you.

“What happened, dove? What’d I do?”

“Nothing, Rem, you didn’t do an-”

“Don’t fib.” He interrupted, his tone stern but his lip jutting out in a very dramatic pout. 

“I’m okay.” You murmured, though you did attempt to sit up and replace your boobs into the confinement of your tank top. Remus watched the action with rapt attention. 

“Did I hurt you?” He asked then, and his voice sounded so small that you actually wanted to cry.

“No! No, baby, I’m- ugh, I’m sorry, you didn’t hurt me, I’m just hurting.” You appeased, reaching out to stroke his arm in a manner you hoped to be soothing. 

He seemed to consider your form again as his shoulders sagged. “You’re sore.” He concluded. 

“Yeah, I… well, I get a little sore around this time of the month, you know?” You admitted, watching as Remus’ expression shifted from one of worry to one of abject horror.

“Dovey.” He chided as he stared at you wide eyed.

“It’s okay! I’m fine, we can keep going if you want, I-”

But you only seemed to horrify him even more as his head reared back in shock. “Keep going!? Baby, you are sore to the touch and you were just going to let me maul you?!”

You found yourself very much ill-prepared for this conversation as you shook your head in confusion. “Well, I just meant, if you wanted to we-”

But Remus was scoffing and waving you off before standing abruptly and moving towards the attached bathroom, scolding you along the way.

“Bollocks to what I want, dove. My desire doesn’t come before your comfort.” He explained before you heard water running and him muttering something in Welsh under his breath. 

You were having a hard time understanding whether you were in actual trouble or not before he came padding back out of the bathroom - still muttering to himself in Welsh - with a divot between his brows and a damp washcloth in his hands.

“Take this off, dove.” He directed; tone now soft and alerting you to the fact that there was no real heat behind his chiding.

You obediently shed your tank top and tossed aside as Remus guided you to lay back onto your pillows and placed the cold cloth on your chest.

“Poor girls.” He cooed as he situated himself beside you. “Was being s’mean to them, too.” 

“Rem-”

He simply shushed you and placed a quick kiss on your nose before dotting a gentle one on each of your tits. 

“They’re gonna hate me; they’re gonna think I’m a monster.” He lamented woefully before standing up to change into his pyjamas. 

“They don’t know a damn thing.” You laughed as you let out a breath, relishing in the ease of your banter with Remus.

You weren’t used to it; things being easy, that is. Relationships always felt like hard work before.

Your relationship with Remus still required work, mind you, but it wasn’t hard; it was comfortable and patient and flexible and understanding.

There was no forcing puzzle pieces to fit when their edges didn’t match, there was no walking on eggshells wondering what sort of mood he was going to be in, and there was no stewing on conversations as you tried and failed to fall asleep at night wondering what in the hell you’d manage to do wrong this time.

No, Remus was easy; he was easy to get along with, easy to live with, easy to love.

He was just so easy.

You hoped he thought the same of you.

“Dovey.” He murmured quietly, now apparently kneeling on the floor on your side of the bed as he rested his chin on his forearms. “You know that, right?” He continued when you opened your eyes to look at him.

“Know what?” 

His mouth pursed again in a small pout before he leaned forward to press a kiss to your shoulder. 

“That what I want should never come before what you need; that my desires are nowhere near as important as your comfort.”

His eyes moved to watch as you pulled your lower lip between your teeth. “Okay.” You whispered.

He let out a sad breath as his brows twitched in sympathy, but you were thankful he opted not to comment on it. 

“I love you.” He offered then, eyes moving back up to yours as he used one of his knuckles to rub at your upper arm affectionately.

“I love you too.” You answered readily. 

He seemed appeased by that and stood to press a more assured kiss to your lips. “Do you want me to run this under cold water again? Or would something else help?”

You pretended to think about it before looking back up at him through your lashes. “Think we could cuddle?”

Remus let out a chuckle as he pressed another kiss, this time to your forehead, and pulled the cloth off of your chest. 

“It’s like you read my mind, sweetheart.”

[bvidzsoo]

Love Me Like A Rockstar (9)

ー☆ Chapter 9: You (Show Me Where My Days Went)

Author: bvidzsoo

Pairing: Song Mingi x female reader

ー☆ Warning: cursing ー☆ Word count: 9.8k ー☆ Genre: university!au, enemies to lovers!au, rockstar!au ー☆ Rating: sfw ー☆ Summary: Love. You wanted none of it. You had already been heartbroken very badly once, you didn't wish to go through that ever again. But the Universe works in intricate ways and, somehow, you found yourself webbed up in a local rockstar's life, Song Mingi. He was everything you expected him to be, yet nothing like you imagined him he would be. What happens when you find mutual understanding and have heartful conversations? Will he be able to break down your walls? Will you be able to chase away his darkness?

A/N: Hi, lovelies!! LMLAR is BACK!! I am sooo happy I could finally update and just write, y'all have no idea! I am so sorry for making you wait so long for this update, but finishing my thesis was super important! I still have to study and such this month, but I promise next update won't take as long as this one did! (I'm writing other stories too while writing this one, so that kinda backfires sometimes lol) I am forever grateful that you are patient and stick around for the new chapters, this story is so dear to me you wouldn't even believe it. I am also super grateful and happy whenever you leave feedback, so please, keep on doing just that!<3 This chapter only exists because I was randomly inspired, and I'd like to apologize if it's a little rusty, I always have to get in "character" when I write this story lol. I am soo excited for next chapter, I think it's going to surprise you hehe. PLS PLS imagine that airport look from Mingi when reading this chapter, the pics from the moodboard, you'll see during which part! I also have a very small surprise at the end of this chapter hehe. I hope the time jumps aren't too confusing:(( Please, listen to the song called You before or while reading! Enough yapping, I hope you enjoy and leave feedback! (Taglist is always open for those interested! ^^)

Taglist: @orshii @or5i @lovely-red2 @scarfac3 @juicy-red @sunaswifes-blog @voicesinmyhead-rc @teez-the-time @maru-matt @kyeos4ng @deathbyyeekies @chicksmoothie @mjlbn01 @xhexy @tmtxtf @hwashiningstar @thatfavouritesong @ateez-atiny380

⟨Series M.list ↭ Previous Chapter⟩

♫Playlist♫

Later that day

I hate him: hey…just checking in that I got home safely what are u up to?

I blinked, fingers tightening around my phone before I locked it, leaving the message on unread. My mother’s shuffling outside my door caught my attention, bringing a smile onto my lips as I watched her struggle while bringing all the dirty laundry to the bathroom. Then, I got off my bed to go help her.

Friday (11:30 am)

I hate him: i see u still haven’t checked my message… nothing too worrisome u certainly know how to make a man yearn for you lol that was a joke…dont freak out on me pls (lowkey true tho)

Friday (12:50 pm)

I hate him: lol, wooyoung has been bitching about seulgi’s professor for half an hour now mr. kwon u know him? i mean…i suppose he also teaches u i should take a sneaky video for u…wooyoung looks like a clown hanging upside down my bed and pouting like a damn child too (dont say im also one, thanks)

Friday (15:26 pm)

I hate him: well…ik my messages are going through so uh… why tf are u ignoring me???! *cries and dies in loneliness* entertain me dollll!!! im so bored pls oh…u said u had an important assignment…i bet u’re busy with that sorry for spamming u (text back tho when u’re done, im dying here…wooyoung is with seulgi and so is seonghwa with hongjoong…the single life sucks, bestie…lets be single and depressed together<3)

My jaw clenched as I heaved a long sigh, falling back on my bed as the sun shone brightly through my open window, the light breeze making me shiver as I only wore a t-shirt and sweats. Autumn was slowly turning into winter; the weather wasn’t so warm anymore. I threw another look at my phone, unlocked it, and stared at the received messages from Mingi for a second before finally deciding to delete them from my notification center, rolling over in bed to muffle a frustrated scream into my soft, and purple, pillow.

            Saturday (9:09 am)

I hate him: i had the weirdest dream and im not even sure i want to tell u about it LOL but uh…a grisly was chasing me??? and then u appeared on a fucking white horse like a prince LOL and threatened to like…slay it if it didnt leave me alone??? honestly…what a slay, bestie good morning, btw, doll hope u had a better night’s sleep than me (and dreamed of me ehehehe)

            Saturday (17:40 pm)

I hate him: i cant believe i allowed myself to be fooled like this back in highschool yuyu and i used to play baseball for shits and giggles and hongjoong (that rich prick) rented a whole ass baseball field for us for the afternoon and let us play with some of his (rich af) friends and uh… i think i wont be able to walk straight for another week with how much running i did… hongjoong kept scoring homeruns…i wish yuyu was here to kick his loser ass (dont tell hwa or hong i said that PLS) yo doll…everything’s alright with u? uh u…really havent answered me since… yk…i stayed over and waited for the rain to stop… have i done something wrong?

I sighed and put my phone on ‘do not disturb’, suddenly having lost all of my appetite as I forced the rest of the lettuce down my throat. My mother was sipping her kiwi and apple smoothie, eyes narrowed as she muttered to herself while trying to memorize the recipe of a dessert for later. Desserts were never her forte, unfortunately.

“Is it Seulgi?” She asked absentmindedly as I took a large gulp of my own smoothie, staring down at my salad, steak pushed to the side in my plate.

“Huh?” I asked distracted, eyes still glued to the dark screen of my phone.

“Texting you, your phone keeps buzzing, my starlight.” I rolled my eyes at the nickname, but didn’t bother to comment on it. I took a peek at my mother and her eyes were narrowed at me already, video on YouTube paused. Fuck, I had to answer her now or else she’d pester me all day long. And that would be a nightmare.

“Yeah, it’s Seulgi.” I lied, trying to make my voice sound convincing.

“Well, answer her then, don’t be rude.” My mother chastised me, pressing play on her video again, pursing her lips as she shook her head at whatever the man baking was saying.

“Later.” I whispered, biting my lower lip as my eyes remained glued to my phone, stomach clenching and heart dropping.

But I couldn’t.

            Sunday (1:01 am)

I hate him: …you’re ignoring me, arent u? im sorry, y/n, i dont know what i did wrong, but we can talk about it we’re friends, after all…right?

『When you came along, I knew what was wrong

If you want to know exactly what I've missed』

            Monday (present time)

            It truly would have been a missed opportunity if Seulgi and I wouldn’t have grabbed coffee and went to sit in our usual spot in the back garden. The campus of our University was huge and that was perfect, because it meant people migrated and didn’t stay in one spot for long—at least long enough to irritate me to no end. Last week deemed to be rather rough, and I still didn’t feel like completely myself. To be honest, I thought about staying home today—and for the rest of the week—but I couldn’t afford missing any of my classes as exam period was slowly nearing, and so, I had to force my ass out of the house this morning before my mother could come and nag me about my weirdly unusual broody mood that has been going on for the past few days.

I hummed as I took a sip of my sweet coffee, enjoying the taste of warm caramel as Seulgi sighed loudly next to me, both hands cupped around her own coffee cup. The scent of cinnamon wafted from her cup and I scrunched up my nose, not too fond of the ingredient’s smell. Our classes started early in the morning today and we’d be here for at least four more hours, caffeine seemed like our only hope to stay awake and aware at this point. Given the fact that my baffling thoughts kept me up all night yesterday, I felt grateful that I was still on my feet at two o’clock at noon. As Seulgi fidgeted again, I chuckled and finally turned my head to look at her. She had a sheepish look on her face, and I tried not to laugh as I knew she was bursting to tell me all about her date with Wooyoung on Saturday.

“Well,” I started as I took a sip of my coffee, prolonging the suspense for her, “how did your date go?”

“It was amazing!” I had barely finished asking as Seulgi exclaimed, her cheeks turning rosy—and it wasn’t due to the cold air, “Wooyoung is—everything I thought he would be. He’s sweet and up for anything, he makes me laugh until I feel like passing out, and there’s just never a dull moment with him, you know?”

“One would expect that from him.” I muttered against my cup, laughing as Seulgi nudged my side, not looking too happy with my comment, “Oh, come on, it would be hard for Wooyoung to be different than the way he mostly presents himself; don’t you think?”

Seulgi grumbled something against her cup as she lightly bit into the carton, shooting me a pointed stare, “Well, yes, but…he makes me happy. Treats me well and all that, you know, he’s the perfect embodiment of what a boyfriend should be like.”

“Boyfriend, huh?” I teased with a smirk, wriggling my eyebrows at my best friend as her cheeks flushed an even darker color as she bit her lower lip, trying to mask the huge grin expanding on her lips. But as soon as I started giggling, Seulgi also broke out in a fit of giggles, hiding herself behind her wavy hair, pressing her cup of coffee against her face.

“God, I’m so down bad for him, Y/N, I don’t think you’d understand.” She mused, voice airy as she threw her head back, leaning back against the back of the bench. I chuckled and took another sip of my drink.

“Maybe I’d do.” I muttered, memories of my relationship with Yunho resurfacing. Thankfully, however, I managed to repress them as quickly as they came. They didn’t feel so gut-wrenching anymore, and to my surprise, didn’t leave a bitter taste in its wake either. What has changed? Certainly—certainly getting closer to his best friend didn’t influence the way I feel about Yunho, right? Right.

“So,” I glanced at Seulgi from the corner of my eyes as she swung her legs, looking down at her feet in the process, “how are you?”

“Fine, why?” I asked confused, angling my body to face Seulgi better.

“You’ve been…distant the whole weekend. I could barely reach you.” Seulgi’s voice sounded small and I gulped, feeling bad for making her worry about me, “You know…the last time you pulled away and disappeared, it was bad.”

“I promise you I am doing completely fine, Seulgi, you’d be the first person to know if I was in a bad headspace again, alright?” I reached out and grabbed her hand, squeezing it reassuringly. Seulgi sighed and then raised her head to look at me, lips pulled into a thin line.

“Promise?”

“Of course, I promise.” I smiled at her warmly and she hummed in contentment, squeezing my hand back as she took a sip of her coffee. I followed suit before removing my hand from hers to fiddle with my half empty cup, “I’m just dealing with some things right now. I think I’m confused.”

“About what?” Seulgi asked curiously, leaning closer as I continued to avoid eye contact with her.

“I’ll tell you once I have my thoughts sorted about it.” I chuckled, making Seulgi roll her eyes in displeasure.

“You know, I tell you absolutely everything about myself and how I fell, and you always shut me out and tell me how you felt about a situation when it’s been over for years.” Seulgi pouted, narrowing her eyes at me, “How’s that fair, Y/N?”

“Hey, we work differently, don’t try to guilt trip me now.” I chuckled and took a sip of my coffee, making Seulgi roll her eyes, “Anyways, what did you do on your date with Wooyoung?”

“We went to the cinema,” Seulgi’s face lit up once again, grinning from ear to ear, “He bought me roses, a big bouquet. And after the movie we went for a walk and ended up stargazing in his cabriolet. It was really romantic.”

I smiled, feeling happy for my friend, she deserved someone like Wooyoung, “That actually sounds really amazing…and romantic.”

“Oh, my God, are you really Y/N? Where is my friend that hates anything that has to do with romance, cute stuff, and love?!” Seulgi’s shocked face was mocking and I rolled my eyes, crossing my arms in front of my chest as I leaned back against the back of the bench.

“I don’t hate it, I’m just not a huge fan of all of those things, okay?!” I shrugged, letting my arms fall from my chest as I pushed them inside my coat’s pockets.

“Who’s the culprit?” When I raised my eyebrows at Seulgi, a sign that I didn’t understand her question, she chuckled and leaned closer, “Who’s the man that’s changing your views on life, huh?”

“Man?” I asked with a scoff, giving Seulgi a deadpanned expression, “Does it always have to be about a man? Can’t it be just the fact that I had a change of mind?”

“Sure, because of someone.” Seulgi had a smug look on her face, acting as if she won the argument. But there was no argument here and she had no idea what she was talking about.

“Whatever—” But I got cut off as her phone dinged loudly. Seulgi, very comically, scrambled to reach for her phone and as she opened it up, a wide grin stretched onto her lips. It didn’t take two braincells to realize who had texted her, and thus, I chuckled and turned my head. I sipped my coffee, taking in my environment while Seulgi answered her boyfriend, giggling quietly every now and then.

The campus was finally silent and not as busy as it usually was in the early morning hours. The cold weather also helped in keeping the garden a little quieter as most people preferred to stay inside the warm corridors and classrooms. But the chilly air was good, it soothed my nerves and erased thoughts that weren’t productive. Similar to that, were the emotions that I didn’t want to deal with again, like the guilt that’s never left me ever since Mingi walked out of my house wearing Yunho’s old clothes. It felt wrong letting him take them without knowing the truth about them, but I didn’t feel ready to tell him yet about the truth. I was scared, surprisingly, of what he’d think of me once he found out about Yunho and I. I was scared that—he’d walk away, like Yunho had once done. And that was a very frightening thought. But when had I become so attached to Mingi? When has Mingi managed to infiltrate himself so thoroughly in my life, that the thought of completely losing him became scary? And why was I taking the past few days so badly? It’s not like we were as close as Seulgi and I, or him and Seonghwa and Wooyoung, yet, ignoring him felt like the wrong move to do. However, the reasoning I always circled back to was the fact that I needed space. I had to clear my mind, to find the purpose of this whole friendship that’s been blooming between us, and to make sense of everything. I had to figure out first why Yunho barely scraped my thoughts now, and why was it was Mingi who I found myself thinking of so often. In case you were wondering, no, I still haven’t found the reason, and it was becoming frustrating quite quickly. That near kiss was a—mistake. Yet, it could have been so much worse—it could have been a real kiss. And a real kiss would have ruined everything. I didn’t want to open up to anyone just yet, not when the memories of Yunho still haunted me in my dreams and drawings. Drawings that now more often than not consisted of Song Mingi.

And to my horror, the flipping of paper sheets is what alerted me back to my surroundings as I had been lost in my thoughts, oblivious to Seulgi putting her phone down and grabbing my sketchbook that lay between the two of us on the bench. As I turned my head, my eyes widened as Seulgi’s expression held surprise but amusement as well. She chuckled as she looked up, making eye contact with me. I lunged forward in an instant, trying to take my sketchbook out of her hands, but she leaned back and away, putting it behind herself.

“Bitch, I’m not the only one who’s down bad for a man.” She said with a laugh, making me groan as I gave up trying to snatch my sketchbook back from her.

“I’m not down bad for a man, Seulgi, stop this non-sense.” I hissed, cheeks burning in embarrassment as she kept flipping through my drawings.

“Please,” She scoffed, turning my sketchbook around and making me grimace as I came face to face with an exact replica of Mingi, sitting in his chair, at his studio that one time he invited me inside, “Who the fuck draws so many drawings of one single person if they aren’t in love with them—”

“I’m not in love with Mingi, stop it!” I exclaimed, heart beating fast as Seulgi raised her eyebrows at me, looking unimpressed, “Don’t ever again say that, Seulgi.”

“Okay, calm down, whatever. You’re not in love with Mingi.” She chuckled, closing my sketchbook but she didn’t hand it back yet, “But let’s face it, Y/N, you have a thing for Mingi. It’s super freaking obvious even without the drawings.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” I hissed and finally snatched the sketchbook out of her hands, clutching it to my chest. I knew bringing this along today would turn out to be a mistake, and here I was, facing the repercussions of my actions.

“There’s this glint in your eyes whenever you look at him—”

“Yeah, it’s called dislike.” I scoffed, rolling my eyes.

“And I see how you struggle to refrain yourself from smiling when you’re around him—”

“Bitch, be for real, Mingi and I aren’t even often together around you for you to notice that.” I scoffed, completely appealed by whatever absurd claims my best friend was making.

“So you’re not denying it—would it really be so bad if you liked Mingi?” But Seulgi ignored all my interruption as she raised her eyebrows at me, smiling softly, “He’s a nice guy. Very well-mannered and with a big, and good heart. Wooyoung loves him a lot and is always worrying about him. He says Mingi hasn’t been the same ever since his best friend moved away for college—”

“Mingi is Yunho’s best friend!” I blurted out before I could stop myself, finally feeling like a stone was taken off my chest as I bit my lower lip, averting my eyes from Seulgi’s shocked expression, “Mingi is the best friend Yunho had always talked so much about while we were together. I—do you understand why it would be so bad if I ended up liking Mingi?”

“Y/N,” Seulgi whispered, eyebrows furrowed, “for how long have you know?”

“Long enough.” I muttered before clearing my throat, “So please understand that I’m not ready for whatever the hell me drawing all those sketches of Mingi could mean. A month ago I was close to bursting out crying even at the thought of Yunho, and now I fail to remember his existence on my best days.”

When I dared take a peek at Seulgi, she was smiling softly, almost proudly, “Fine, I’ll pester you about this later on, when you’ve figured things out, but until then—you can’t deny Mingi isn’t hot—”

“Can we stop talking about Min—”

“Hi, girls!” I jumped in fright at the overly excited and shrill greeting as both Seulgi and I turned our heads to be met with…Wooyoung and Mingi. Speak of the devil. Suddenly, there was a lump in my throat, and my heart started beating just a little bit faster as my eyes fell on Mingi’s tall form. It didn’t help that underneath his coat he was wearing Yunho’s sweater—the one I had given him.

“Hi.” Seulgi giggled as Wooyoung leaned down to press a kiss against her cheek, the two looking sickly in love. It was actually endearing, but I’d never admit it out loud for my own sake as I knew I’d get teased about it by Seulgi. I averted my eyes from Wooyoung and Seulgi as they were muttering things to each other, and so, had no choice but to look up at Mingi, who looked—expressionless. Something in my stomach dropped at his cold demeanor, and it was worse that I wanted to assume it was my fault that he looked like that. But just as I was about to look away, he cracked the tiniest smile ever, and I exhaled, licking my lips.

“Hi.” My voice was small as I gulped, eyes trans-fixated on the tall man as his smile became just a little wider. I don’t think I had the power to ignore him anymore, not when he was standing right in front of me, looking like he wished to be anywhere but here.

“Hi, Y/N.” Having not heard his voice in days, it sounded even deeper and raspier than usually, making butterflies erupt in my stomach as my grip tightened around my sketchbook. I felt a little awkward, perhaps even tense, as Mingi didn’t say anything else, just continued gazing down at me with his sharp dark brown eyes boring into my own. I had so many things that I could’ve said to him, but I felt tongue tied. I didn’t know what would be the right way to approach him after I ignored him for so many days. Would he understand? Is he mad at me now? Does he hate me now? Will he forgive me—

“Okay,” Wooyoung chuckled, syllable drawn out and sounding amused, “I feel like I’m interrupting something here, yet they are basically just staring at each other.”

“You’re right.” Seulgi giggled, and I finally looked away from Mingi, throwing a glare at my best friend as she had leaned into Wooyoung’s side, who stood next to the bench and her.

“Shush, you two.” Mingi beat me to telling the two love-birds off, and I couldn’t help but smile, “Don’t poke your nose where it doesn’t belong to.”

“Look who’s lecturing me about poking my nose where it doesn’t belong to—”

“Wooyoung.” Mingi’s tone held a warning, and it made Wooyoung giggle as he leaned down and pressed a fat kiss against Seulgi’s cheek—again—making her push him away playfully.

“We’re headed to class, are you coming over later?” Wooyoung smiled down at his girlfriend, playing with a strand of her hair.

“Maybe, if I get to finish my project.” Seulgi said with a pout and Wooyoung hummed, leaning down to press a kiss against her lips this time around. I averted my eyes, not a fan of seeing couples kiss, only to catch Mingi already looking at me. He was expressionless once again, but he was fidgeting with his fingers, looking almost nervous. And as Wooyoung stood up straight and ruffled Seulgi’s hair affectionately, Mingi took a deep breath.

“Will you come to Outlaw this Friday?” He asked in a rush, sounding almost reluctant as his eyebrows furrowed slightly and he chewed on his lower lip. To my horror, I found my eyes fixated on his plush mouth and I gulped before I quickly averted my eyes, praying that nobody caught it.

“Yes.” I answered before Seulgi could, and nodded, smiling a little bit, “I won’t miss it.”

A beautiful smile spread on Mingi’s lips and he nodded once, looking too happy for something so little. I don’t think I’ll understand anytime soon why he gets so excited and happy when I listen to his songs or watch him perform. I’m no expert when it comes to music, my feedback is merely amateur and I’m not even a fan of his band yet.

“Cool, see you then.” And Mingi didn’t wait for Wooyoung as he turned around and walked away, steps hurried. I didn’t miss the confused glance Wooyoung and Seulgi shared before Wooyoung was off, chasing after his best friend. And maybe I would be soon able to make sense of my thoughts and feelings around Mingi, figure out what they meant and why they felt so real at times.

            Monday (16:58 pm)

I hate him: hi Me: hi I hate him: would it be a lot if i asked to meet u tomorrow? Me: no, im free in the afternoon I hate him: cool, me too so uh…we can hang out in my studio? Me: or we can go to that new café with pottery I hate him: really? Me: u did say u wanted us to go… I hate him: i certainly said so i’ll pick u up around 4 Me: u don’t have to i’ll meet you there I hate him: come on, y/n…let me drive u Me: u’ve driven me around too many times by now i’ll meet u there and that’s final. I hate him: okay, boss, see ya there Me: :))

            Getting here before four o’clock and having to wait in front of the cute café had no business being this nerve-wrecking. Yeah, Mingi hasn’t shown up yet—but perhaps that’s because there were still ten minutes until it’d be four—and I knew I had no reason to think he’d bail on me, but we hadn’t spoken since yesterday, when he had asked me if we could hang out. And so, waiting for him shouldn’t have had me breaking out in a sweat despite the cold weather, making me bite my lower lip harshly as I tried to smooth down the wool, green, brown, and beige patterned coat I was wearing. First of all, why the hell would I be so nervous about meeting up with Mingi alone at this cute café? He probably wanted to talk about that near kiss, and once we had that cleared, things would go back to normal—right?!

And maybe that was the reason which made me want to vomit on the sidewalk, the thought that I knew Mingi would demand answers—answers that I wasn’t yet ready to hand out. Why did I even agree to this? Because I missed him? I should have just stayed at home and done the project I’ve been procrastinating on—again. But when I heard the rumble of Mingi’s old Honda’s engine, I knew there was no turning back, catching the bus and running home to hide underneath my blanket.

As Mingi took his time to parallel park, I took a deep breath and gripped onto the strap of my tote bag harder, looking down at myself. My apricot orange sneakers matched the color of my blouse, the top two buttons out of five undone, but not showing too much skin. My blouse was tucked inside my washed out high waisted mom jeans, the black belt matching the color of my tote bag—I know black isn’t a color, I’m an arts major after all. My hair was pulled in a low ponytail just to prevent the wind from blowing it in my face, and I was thankful that I chose my wool coat as it kept me warm enough. I have opted to wear quite a few rings today, and because my neck felt too exposed, I decorated it with three necklaces of different length. I gulped hard one last time as Mingi got out of his car and took a few seconds until he managed to lock it. However, those few seconds were exactly what I needed to prepare myself to not pass out at the full sight of him.

Mingi, in true fashion to him, wore all black, except for his jeans that were a very dark shade of blue, almost black too. His turtleneck was tucked inside his jeans, a black coat with a hood keeping him warm from the cold late autumn weather. It almost made me smile upon seeing his own tote bag, black, and funnily matching mine. Except that his was plain, while mine had Claude Monet’s Water-Lily Pond painting painted on it, done by none other than yours truly, me. Mingi’s eyes were concealed by black sunglasses, and I snorted as he almost splashed himself up by stepping a little too enthusiastically into a big puddle. Two necklaces hung around his neck, reaching down his chest. A very obvious and sturdy silver cross necklace, and another longer chain that had pearls scarcely strung on it.  And in true Song Mingi fashion, his rings weren’t missing, only two of his nails painted black on each hand, almost as if he didn’t have time to finish doing them. My heart racing in my chest so fast just at the mere sight of him, certainly wasn’t healthy, right?

“Hi!” I squeaked out and wished to burry myself instantly as Mingi chuckled, a very charming smile spreading onto his lips. It was a little annoying that I couldn’t see his eyes, forced to stare at his plush lips instead—let’s be real, nobody forced me, I did it because I couldn’t help myself, “The sun is quite blinding today, isn’t it?”

And of course, in good old fashion, my mouth worked before my brain would agree to saying something out loud, and my cheeks were burning as I knew Mingi saw me look at his lips. I had to divert the attention somehow, and teasing him was my best method, actually. It always worked.  

“I’m trying to make a fashion statement,” Mingi grinned as he gripped the sunglasses and took them off in a very unnaturally hot way, “but hello to you too.”

“No need for a fashion statement when it’s just the two of us,” I narrowed my eyes, finding Mingi’s hair very soft and fluffy looking, almost as if he had recently washed it, and it wasn’t completely dry, “I’m not one of your fans.”

“Pity,” Mingi hummed, stepping slightly closer to me, “I thought I might just finally wove you.”

I scoffed, and as I was about to tell him off, he grabbed my tote bag and pulled me after himself, headed for the entrance of the café, “Did you have to wait long for me? Traffic was busier today, I had to take a few detours to get here in time.”

“Don’t worry,” I smiled as he opened the door for me and let me walk inside first, “I only waited half an hour for you to arrive, runway princess.”

“Runway princess?!” Mingi’s eyes bulged for a second before he started laughing loudly, making a few customers glance our way as we made it inside the café. I elbowed him in the stomach gently, not too keen of having people glare at us as he disturbed their peace.

“Don’t like the nickname?” I asked with a raised brow as we neared the front desk. The cashier had a friendly smile on her face while she greeted us as Mingi and I looked up at the menu, trying to decide what we’d like to have.

“Never said that,” Mingi answered with a chuckle as he threw me a quick glance, “it’s just surprising coming from you.”

“Why, can’t I call you a princess?” I chuckled, turning to face the cashier as I have made up my mind about what I’d like to have.

“Up until now you seemed to prefer the term ‘bro’, but I’m fine with whatever you decide on calling me, doll.” The look the cashier gave us made my cheeks flame up and I cleared my throat loudly, shooting Mingi a look that told him to shut up.

“Sorry about that,” I muttered embarrassed, smiling at the cashier, “can I get a strawberry cheesecake?”

“Sure, right away, and you, sir?” Her attention was on Mingi now, cheeks flushing the longer she looked at him. Okay, I could totally understand why. Mingi looked quite good right now, it was hard not to ogle him.

“A mint-chocolate cheesecake and a cappuccino?” Mingi hummed, eyebrows furrowed in thought as he looked down at the cashier.

“Plain cappuccino or with vanilla?” The cashier typed in our orders as she asked Mingi, averting her eyes shyly once he looked at her, pursing his lips.

“Plain,” He decided at last, turning to look at me, “are you not getting anything to drink?”

“An orange fresh will be alright.” I said as I reached inside my bag to fish around for my wallet.

“And would you also like to paint some pottery?” The cashier asked, pointing behind herself at all the displayed options. Mingi and I shared a look and I smiled as I nodded at him, making him grin from ear to ear.

“Yeah, we’ll paint some pottery too. Can I have a cup?” He asked, pointing at one on the higher shelf. It was a smaller cup, specifically made for drinking coffee. The cashier nodded and then looked at me expectantly.

“Uh, a mug will do for me.” I said and thanked her once she handed us the pottery and the paint that was used for painting these. Then, she tapped a few more on her tablet and told us the total. I opened my wallet to pay for my purchase, but Mingi had a card in his hands, the cashier already typing in the total sum for him to pay.

“Mingi,” I hissed quietly, looking at him with a frown, “what are you doing?”

“It was my idea to come here—”

“No, it wasn’t.” I cut him off, fingers curling into the scratchy fabric of his coat as I reached out to hold it, “I suggested we come here instead of going to your studio.”

Mingi sighed and pocketed his card, already having paid, then turned his body to face mine. I didn’t let go of his coat just yet, “Yeah, but when I drove you home during that downpour I asked you if you’d come here with me. So technically, it was my idea. Initially, anyways, it really was.”

“Mingi—” I started, but soon swallowed my words as he stepped closer, invading my personal space. My fingers tightened more into his coat and I gulped, suddenly feeling nervous due to our proximity. He faintly smelled of vanilla, it was a fragrance I didn’t except to smell on him.

“Can you not fight me on this one, please?” Mingi’s eyebrows slightly furrowed and his eyes softened up and I—struggled to breathe for a second as I stared up in his pleading eyes, mouth going dry. He looked—adorable like this, and I did not like the way I felt myself getting lost in his soft gaze.

“Let’s find a table.” I muttered, forcing myself out of the trance he placed on me, and grabbed my mug and the painting supplies. Mingi followed suit as he took his own cup and followed after me closely. We walked further inside the café and found a smaller table in the next room, closer towards the window. The walls were painted a faint orange and were decorated by white stripes that created abstract shapes. The chandeliers were white and hung low, the place well-lit for those who wished to paint pottery.

I placed the things in my hands on the table carefully, and then discarded my coat on the back of my chair and my tote bag by the leg of the table, pulling my chair out for myself. Mingi followed suit, however, he managed to almost send his cup tumbling to the floor when he took his seat. His eyes were wide as he just barely caught the cup, and I giggled as I watched him while opening the box that held all the paint. Thankfully, the table was spacious enough to harbor both our pottery and paints as the cashier brought out our delicacies. She threw Mingi a lasting look before she hurried back to the front desk, glancing our way at times.

“This is going to be a tough one.” Mingi said before scooping up a bit of his cheesecake with his little spoon.

“Why?” I asked with a chuckle, choosing a thin brush to start painting some flowers on my mug. My cheesecake could wait.

“Because I’m literally sat at a table with an arts major, having to decorate some cup by painting.” Mingi sounded stressed and I chuckled as I looked up at him, amused by his expression. His hair fell in his eyes a bit, and I found myself absentmindedly reaching over the table to brush it to the side. Almost as if realizing at the same time what I had done, we both froze. It felt like time stilled around us as I watched Mingi with a gaping mouth, slowly but surely, my cheeks becoming the color of a fire hydrant. But Mingi wasn’t better off as he bit his bottom lip, averting his eyes shyly as his cheeks turned the faint color of pink. Clearing my throat and accidentally choking as I hastily pulled my hand back, I averted my eyes and fought for my life to not choke. Thank God the orange juice was right there, I quickly took three large gulps.

“Th—thanks.” Mingi stuttered, staring at the table as he licked his lips, “Uh, it’s gotten long, my hair, I mean, I have to cut it when I get the time.”

“Yeah.” I nodded, grabbing my mug and chewing on my bottom lip in embarrassment—God, could the Earth swallow me up right now? Why the hell did I do that?! “Yeah.”

“Do you think I should change it up a little?” I paused as I had dipped my brush in red paint, and slowly looked up at Mingi, “Do something fun with it—like going blonde?”

“I hate blonde hair.” I blurted out before I could stop myself. Nice one, idiot. Yunho was blonde while we were together, and thus, yeah, I’ve hated blondes ever since. And to be fair—and this is not me shitting on my ex—but that hair color did not suit Yunho at all.

“Oh, noted.” Mingi whispered, pouting a little. I sighed and looked up at the ceiling, hating myself for the weird atmosphere I have created.

“Mingi, you can do whatever you want with your hair.” I spoke up, leaning down to try and look him in the eyes as he was busy staring at the table, “My opinion shouldn’t matter. It’s your hair. Go crazy with it, have fun, try out something new. Really.”

“But do you think it would suit me?” Mingi was still pouting as he finally looked up at me, looking quite crestfallen. My eyebrows furrowed and I tried to imagine him with blonde hair. He was quite blessed with his skin complex as most colors looked good on him, but perhaps I preferred Mingi with dark hair—black hair, more specifically. Like he had it right now. He looked—good. Handsome, even. Completely gorgeous. Fuck.

“I think it would suit you.” I settled on saying that. He didn’t have to know my train of thought, like at all. Mingi hummed in appreciation, and I watched as he reached inside his tote bag, pulling out a case that held his glasses. He took it out of the case and put it on, pushing it up on the bridge of his nose. He grinned when he looked at me and I chuckled, shaking my head as I looked down at my mug, finally starting to decorate it.

“There goes the cool, mysterious, hot celebrity act.” I teased under my breath, not expecting Mingi to hear me. But he did, and he started laughing, giving me a cheeky grin.

“Not quite a celebrity yet, but at least you admit I am hot.” Of course he was smirking as I gave him a deadpanned look, about to argue him on his statement, but he didn’t let me as he continued talking, “By the way, let’s exchange our cups when we are done. The mug will be mine and the cup will be yours.”

I tried to fight the smile off my lips, “So that you get the artwork of a talented artist for free to sell for an outrageous price later on when I’m famous?”

“I fear you have misjudged my character, doll.” Mingi’s eyes narrowed playfully, but there was truth to his words. I might just have misjudged his character.

“I still think you’re arrogant and selfish.”

“Of course you do, didn’t except anything less from you.” Mingi winked and then looked down, his cheesecake forgotten as he started decorating his cup, tongue just barely sticking out as he concentrated hard on whatever he had in mind to paint onto the cup. I chuckled and shook my head before focusing on my own mug, the silence that’s settle around us comfortable, as always.

            Mingi and I were the quietest table in the café as we worked in silence diligently in, painting our own pottery. Mingi, at times, would hum along quietly to the songs that were played on the radio. Despite his cup being smaller and easier to paint, I finished painting mine before him, and so, I took the time to savor my cheesecake even if it had gotten warm and a little too soft. Mingi was hunched over in his seat, glasses low on the bridge of his long nose, with his full lips either pursed or with the bottom one bitten as his eyebrows would furrow every time he almost made a mistake. It was a funny sight, and I grabbed my phone without thinking much, and snapped a few pictures of him, leaning lower and even closer to his face to get the funny angles, all while Mingi remained oblivious to it. I chuckled as I looked at the pictures I had taken of him, looking at him when I felt eyes on me.

“What’s so funny?” He asked curiously, eyeing my phone for a second.

“You.” I chuckled and stuck my tongue out as Mingi rolled his eyes, leaning back in his chair as he heaved a long sigh.

“I’m finally done.” He grinned and I looked down at his cup, taking in the yellow chicks he had painted quite—clumsily. Well, not all of us had the skills of a painter—not that it was an issue or anything—it’s just that it’s been long since I had seen someone have the skills of a—kindergartner, “It’s pretty sick, huh?”

I bit my lower lip to stop myself from giggling and nodded with my eyebrows furrowed, “I’d give it a seventy out of a hundred mark.”

“Hey! That’s too low!” Mingi said, looking offended. I chuckled before shrugging.

“You’ll have to work on your skills for a higher mark.”

“Fine, next time you come to the studio, I’ll make you sing.” Mingi raised his eyebrows, making me narrow my eyes at him playfully.

“Oh, I didn’t know we are in a competition.”

“We weren’t, until now.” He winked and then stood, grabbing my mug and his own cup carefully as he took it to the front desk for drying. I gathered the items we had used to paint the pottery with to place them back in the box, and couldn’t help it but sneak a glance at Mingi. He was leaned up against the front counter, grinning widely at the cashier as she spoke to him, using her hands for big gestures as she was probably explaining something. My eyes narrowed as Mingi leaned slightly closer to her, only to detach himself from the front desk and walk back towards our table. I looked away and busied myself with my glass of orange juice.

“So, we’ll get them delivered to our houses once they are dry and all.” He said with a smile, sitting down, “I hope you don’t mind I gave her your address too.”

“I don’t.” I muttered, chewing on the straw for a second, “I didn’t think you’d know my address.”

“Well,” Mingi flattened his hands on the surface of the table, “I’ve been to your house twice now. I think it’s only right I remember your address, doll.”

“Right,” I muttered, “you’ve been to my house.”

Mingi’s eyebrows furrowed, and I figured he didn’t like the tone of my voice. But before I could correct myself and explain that I had nothing against that, he spoke up, “Y/N, I—I didn’t mean to scare you or—I don’t know—make you think that I want anything from you. I mean—we are friends, and I respect you as a woman and as a friend, and I know we almost—kissed. But I—I don’t want you to think that I’m playing some sort of game with you to get—to get in your pants. I’m your friend. And even if I wasn’t, I still wouldn’t do that to you.”

Hearing him say all that felt wrong. I didn’t deserve any explanation from him. I was the one that’s overreacted that day, and Mingi was the one that deserved an explanation and apology from me for the way I have acted. I knew I couldn’t completely open up to him right now, that some parts of the truth had to be omitted today, but he also deserved to know why I had pulled back. And I wanted him to understand that it wasn’t his fault for the way I reacted to everything.

“Mingi,” I offered him a small smile and gripped my empty glass for some support, “If you think you are the reason why I ignored you, please, stop thinking that. It’s—we both leaned in, okay? We were both about to kiss each other, it’s not like you initiated it or forced me to do something I didn’t want to. And nothing even happened, for God’s sake. I reacted that way because I—”

When I paused, Mingi’s eyebrows furrowed, and he leaned over the table, gently poking my hand with his ring clad fore-finger, “You don’t have to tell me anything if you’re not comfortable sharing it, Y/N.”

“But I want you to know this, Mingi.” I averted my eyes and took a deep breath, embracing myself for what I was about to tell him, “I had a boyfriend back in high-school who completely broke my heart, shattered it into pieces. And I know that happened a long time ago, and yes, I am over him, but I—I am scared people will treat me like he had treated me. I’m scared that if I let you close, you’ll just—leave. Like he did. And I know ignoring you for days was very shitty of me and I shouldn’t have done that—because quite frankly, Mingi, you deserve better—I just didn’t know what to do. I needed a few days to myself, to figure things out. It’s a bad excuse, but it’s the truth, and I think you deserve to know it. Since we are friends.”

Mingi’s face conveyed no emotion for a few seconds and I gulped, feeling nervous all of a sudden. Did he figure it out now? That I was talking about Yunho? That maybe I have started feeling something for him too, for Mingi? Would he stand up and leave? But to my surprise, a wide smile stretched onto his lips and he hummed, adjusting his glasses on his nose.

“Thank you for trusting me, it means a lot that you told me all that.” I bit my bottom lip, looking down at the table abashedly, “And I was never mad at you for ignoring me. I completely understand you, Y/N, and for the record, I have zero intentions of leaving you. And your ex is a fucking asshole for breaking your heart like that, tell me who he is and I’ll beat him up when I cross paths with him.”

There was nothing funny about what Mingi had said, especially since he was talking about his best friend, but the comically tough look on his face made me snort loudly as I shielded my mouth with my hand, trying to stop myself from laughing too loudly. Mingi started grinning like an idiot, his giggles deep, and making something coil in my stomach. When has Song Mingi become adorable instead of annoying?

“I doubt you’d want to kick his ass once you find out who he is…” I grimaced once that was out of my mouth, regretting it instantly. What was it about today that I couldn’t keep my thoughts and mouth in check? It was turning really frustrating.

“So, you plan on telling me one day?” Mingi wriggled his eyebrows, making me snort, “Like real besties gossiping and shit.”

“You never fail to make me cringe when you call us besties, Mingi.” I shook my head, taking a glance at my wrist watch. Oh, the time had flown away, it was well past five now, and the sun was going down. I’d probably have to head home soon to have dinner with my mother. I was becoming hungry too.

“Well, that’s what we are so…” He cleared his throat before slowly standing up, making me look up at him, “Did you know today we’re celebrating the Festival of Light?”

“Nope, I had no idea.” I shook my head, standing up too as Mingi wore his coat, “I don’t follow the events our city organizes.”

“Pity, it’s really pretty.” Mingi pouted, waiting for me as I grabbed my tote bag and pocketed my phone, “Should we check it out?”

“I mean…maybe?” I shrugged and Mingi beckoned me over as he crossed his arm with mine, making me chuckle as I looked up at him. He wasn’t much taller than me, but his sneakers had a thick sole and they made him even taller, “Where is this festival held at?”

“Just down the street, at the Citadel.” Mingi smiled as he led the way out of the café, waving at the barista as she blushed again, making me chuckle as I subconsciously nuzzled up against Mingi’s side, the air chilly as the sun had set by now.

“That barista totally has a crush on you.” I found myself saying as we walked down the sidewalk, trying to avoid crashing into the people that came towards us. Yeah, there certainly was an event on-going in the city, otherwise you wouldn’t see so many people out and about around this time. Everyone preferred staying inside after the sun had set, not keen of the cold nights.

“You think so?” Mingi mused, bottom lip jutting out as he narrowly avoided a child that was running around, “I didn’t notice.”

“You must be really dense then.” I snorted, eyebrows furrowing as I looked up at him, “She was constantly blushing, and she was totally looking at you with hearts in her eyes.”

“How do you know when someone is looking at you with heart eyes?” Mingi’s question threw me off, and I detached myself from his side, clearing my throat as I looked ahead, pushing my hands in my pockets. He was warm, it made me realize as the cold bit at my skin now that I wasn’t nuzzled up by his side anymore.

“Well, they have this look in their eyes, you know? It’s warm, and soft, and it lasts.” I explained, feelings my cheeks heat up, “And their eyes always linger on you when you aren’t watching them. It’s like…puppy eyes, I suppose? I wouldn’t actually know, Mingi, nobody’s ever looked at me like that.”

When there was no response, I looked back to find Mingi looking at me intensely. My eyebrows furrowed as we have arrived to the Citadel, the gates open for the visitors of the festival. The place was packed, this wouldn’t be so fun anymore. I would’ve turned around and walked back home if I didn’t see how excited Mingi was when I agreed to come check it out.

“There’s lots of people here.” Mingi muttered, and then walked closer to me as I led the way inside, a little baffled by his reaction to my answer. I just merely gave an answer based on my beliefs. It was him that was acting weird now. But as I looked at him, I could see it in his eyes that he didn’t want to talk about this topic anymore, that he wanted us to drop the subject. His last comment was a way to veer the conversation in a different direction. What was it about us today making everything weird? I sighed and just walked further inside, trying to avoid the big crowd which seemed almost impossible as it stretched on and on. The Citadel, however, was beautiful as it was coated in darkness, only the little paper lamps and fairy lights illuminating the place. It had a certain aura to it, almost romantic, and I soon found myself smiling as we walked down the cobblestone path, still trying to avoid people and stick close to each other’s sides. The air was chilly but the walls of the Citadel did a great job at keeping the breeze out, and the crowd certainly kept the place warmer than it was outside the stone walls.

I found myself admiring the décor in wonder, my mouth hanging open as I took in all the little lamps placed down on the ground, following the cobblestone paths, illuminating our way. It was truly beautiful, it almost felt like the scene was taken out of a fairytale. I found myself filled with excitement and happiness as I turned to grin at Mingi.

“This is so beautiful!” I giggled, absentmindedly grabbing the sleeve of his coat and dragging him away from the path and into the dying grass as there was a panel covered with paper, and people were writing on it. Mingi remained silent, but as I searched around for a pen or pencil, I felt him watching me, “What, do you not want to write something?”

“If you manage to find a marker or pen, I will, sure.” He said with a shrug, adjusting the strap of his tote bag before he pushed his hands deep in his pockets. I chuckled and looked around for a marker, but it was hard to see it in the darkness whether they were laying around in the grass or not. To my surprise, a little girl standing next to me looked up at me with a small smile on her lips, and offered me her purple-coloured marker, saying she was done with her drawing. I thanked her with a chuckle and turned to face Mingi with a grin.

“I found one!” Mingi chuckled and took the marker from my hands, being able to reach high up where the paper was still empty, due to his height. The panel was illuminated from the inside so you could actually see what was written on the paper. I watched him as he wrote on the paper, hesitating for a second, before he stepped back and handed me the marker. I raised up on my tip toes curiously, and craned my neck to see what he’s written. ‘The moon is beautiful tonight.’

I felt a smile spread onto my lips as I looked back at Mingi, who’s expression was serious and almost sad-looking as he adjusted his glasses on the bridge of his tall nose. I craned my neck back once more to gaze at the dark sky, at the moon, and indeed, there she was, beautiful and shining brightly. It was a new moon. Taking a swift glance at Mingi, I raised back on my tip toes and stood close to the panel, reaching up, just underneath Mingi’s writing. Thankfully, I could reach just bellow it, and I grinned as I quickly drew a new moon, adding a little shading to it and dents as well, creating the illusion of a real moon. Mingi remained silent as I took a step back, admiring our work. I handed the marker to another child as I fished my phone out of my pocket and snapped a picture quickly of our artwork.

“The moon turned out beautifully.” Mingi commented once we had stepped away from the panel to let others draw too, headed back onto the cobblestone path.

“Still, it’s not as beautiful as the real one, but I tried my best.” I chuckled as I crossed my arms in front of my chest for a second, avoiding a man as he wasn’t looking in front of himself as he raced down the path. Mingi threw him a displeased look before looking down at me.

“Your drawings and paintings are always beautiful, Y/N.” Mingi said and I found myself blushing, thankful that it was so dark he wouldn’t be able to see it. I uncrossed my arms and turned my body a little to face him. There was music coming from one path, the one which led to the southern part of the Citadel.

“Are you nervous about Friday?” I found myself asking him as Mingi veered us towards where the music was coming from. He looked at me for a second, and then shook his head.

“I’m rarely nervous when we have to perform.” He said nonchalantly, the back of his hand brushing lightly against mine. My heart did a somersault against my ribcage, but I ignored it.

“Oh, you’re such a cool guy.” I teased him with narrowed eyes, making Mingi chuckle.

“I rarely get nervous, to be honest, even less when it comes to performing.” He hummed, looking up at the dark sky for a second, “I trust myself and my bandmates that everything will go well, so, there’s no actual reason to feel nervous.”

“But I’ll be there on Friday, that still doesn’t make you feel nervous?” My question was meant to be teasing, part of our playful banter, but the way Mingi gulped and quickly averted his eyes told me that perhaps I hit the nail spot-on. Well, now I have turned things awkward again. I sighed loudly, chewing on my bottom lip as Mingi remained silent, the two of us walking down the narrow path as the music became louder as we were nearing the stage. Jazz music was playing, the lady who was singing had a powerful and smooth voice that carried over the crowd neatly. There were a few people dancing in the crowd.

“Perhaps having you there will make me nervous.” Mingi’s voice was barely above a whisper and I tensed when I felt his pinkie brush against my own, making me clench my hand into a fist. But a very quiet voice inside my head demanded me to accept Mingi’s subtle request, and willing my heart to stop hammering so hard in my chest, I relaxed my hand and slowly slipped it into Mingi’s. If he stopped walking for a milli-second, I didn’t say anything about it, and he also ignored it. His grip turned firm as he intertwined our fingers together, gently pulling me closer into his side as he smiled at a mother who apologised for his son almost running into us.

I gulped and kept my eyes ahead of me, too nervous to look at Mingi. Holding his hand like this meant nothing in particular, but it was a nice feeling. It made my cheeks warms and heart race. And I didn’t have to look at Mingi to know he was smiling like crazy, his cheeks just as red as mine as we came to a stop behind the dancing people.

Have I started falling for Song Mingi?

『It's you, ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh

I'm just saying it's you, ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh

You, ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh

You're what I've been chasing

Show me where my days went』

❱❱ Next chapter

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❀ complete the forms if you're interested! ^^

so...the festival of light scene was totally inspired by me and my bestie attending it in our city lol; it was sooo beautiful and the pictures in the moodboard were actually taken by us; also, her and I kept laughing about the romantic vibes we were getting, all in all, we had a nice time...and OFC we make everything about Ateez so :))

I wrote that LOL I'm like Mingi, tall enough to reach the top where people haven't scribbled onto yet lol

also, this is what y/n's outfit looks like for anyone wondering, except for the colors as they are the way I have described them in the scene ^^

[sillyblues]

the ocean and the wind. (6)

ੈ✩‧₊˚ synopsis: tonowari is the ocean and ronal is the wind. where does it leave you?

ੈ✩‧₊˚ notes: yooo i'm so sorry for the super late update, school got me tied up again aksldnakjd i speedran writing this so if there's any mistakes i am so sorry!! anyways the next part will be the last part and can i just say holy shit??? totw is finally ending and i gen don't know how to feel about this. anyways ive read so much of your replies and i am so honoured and flattered that many of you love this story! i am kissing your forehead as you read this btw xoxo as usual, pls let me know your thoughts and which parts were your favourite! till next time!!

part 1 ✩ part 2 ✩ part 3 ✩ part 4 ✩ part 5 ✩ part 6 (here!) ✩ part 7 (final part)

Tonowari is at a loss as he watches you ignore him once more. He talked to you before, he asked you where you had been as you seemingly disappeared into thin air for a couple of weeks. He could not see even a glimpse of your hair and the days without you, his head swam in concern and worry. Have you gone sick? Were you okay? Did something happen? 

As the days without any news from gone by, he grew more distracted from his classes and it was the same for Ronal as well. She grew more anxious and distressed as days went by, and without a proper outlet to let it all out, she grew more emotionally unstable. They could only comfort each other but not once has the turbulence in their heart disappear from the thought of you.

When the news of you that you had gotten sick, he felt helpless. He wanted to come into your home and check in on how you were doing, to be by your side and take care of you in any way he and Ronal can, but your mother had not allowed it. He contemplated sneaking inside your pod to at least see you but there he could not disobey the Healer of the clan. So he sighs inside his heart and with a strained smile, he thanks your mother for the news and offered his best wishes for you to get well soon. When he told Ronal of the news, she frowned deeply and huffed. He watched her gather medicinal herbs and nutritious berries before she gripped them hard in her fist and tears welled in her eyes.

“[Name]... I want to see her,” she said in a brittle voice, her face contorted with longing and anguish for you. Tonowari grabbed her face with both of his hands and pushed the hair out of her face.

“I know,” he leaned his forehead against hers and looks at her straight in the eyes. Her tears slipped and rolled down her cheeks silently and his heart broke apart at the sight of her in pain. Helplessness crept up and weigh his heavy heart down once again. Now, Ronal was hurting and there was nothing he could do. “[Name] is strong. We’ll see them back in no time and they will be healthy when they return.”

“And when they do, they will know of the worry we have for them. The painful agony without them and they will laugh at us, tease us at how much of a baby we two are. They will say how we are just giant children that never really aged with how we cannot handle being without them.” He promised her, promised himself, that everything would be okay and would soon return to normal. Ronal let out a snort and she hid in his embrace.

“They will know of the adoration we have for them,” he whispered against her forehead and kissed the top of her head. Fear comes back and it fills his lungs dark blue. But his passion for you outweighs any of his doubts and suddenly he found himself able to breathe underwater. “We will them of beautiful they are, how they fill us with Atokirina. How much love we carry and drown for her. When [Name] returns, they will finally see how we see them.”

“When [Name] returns.” Ronal murmured against his chest with finality.

Hope swelled in Tonowari’s chest but reality burst it open. When he finally saw you again, relief and joy takes away the heavy weight from his shoulders. When he and Ronal came up to you, they were glad they could finally see you and take the Iknimaya with you. However, they were still worried if you were truly well enough to complete the ritual. But that type of worry soon turned into worry about what have they done wrong for you to avoid them.

You weren’t being the usual you, they noticed. Your happy and cheery aura was nowhere to be seen. Your usual rambles turned into small and curt replies. Your genuine smile turned into one he could not recognize anymore as it did not reach your cheeks. You did not see them anymore. He watched you excuse yourself to your other friends and leave him weak and with so much pain. He watched you the whole time during Iknimaya as you avoided his yearning gazes. He watched you as you continued to hurt him unknowingly, or perhaps you did without giving him and Ronal to ask you why. 

You do not see him anymore.

Now, he looks at you, you who is so alluring as you stand underneath the Cove of Ancestors, adorned with the garments your parents had knitted you that fit you so well and your freshly inked chest that represents your big heart that cared for everyone to which he desperately hopes that he and Ronal are included. The bioluminescent Spirit Tree underwater glows so brightly that it still shines on you. Eywa’s creations swims and streaks of light kisses your skin and he could only think how you leave him breathless of your beauty. He finds himself jealous of the water that you stand in and is closer and touches you the way he wants to be with you.

He recalls how you two promised back then that you two would complete your coming-of-age ceremony together and you two did, just not the way he thought it would. Why do you not see him anymore? Do you hate him? Had he done something wrong? Tonowari wanted to beg you and if he has to be on his knees, he will do so without hesitation as long as you tell him and he will do anything for you to see him once more. But he is the Olo’eyktan’s son, the future chief and has an image to show to everyone, as his father tells him every second. But what use is of his position without you?

Ronal grips his hand and looks at him with worry. He presses his lips into a flat lip, a horrible attempt to send her a smile to ease her concerns for him. She squeezes his hand thrice and his heart throbs at the thought of you.

He remembers how you ignored him before and how everything was just like back then. How you avoided him so and how he thought how you must have despised him. How much pain you gave him in months of you pretending he does not exist. You’re so cruel. So, so cruel. What if this time, you truly despise him now? What if he is nothing to you anymore? Can he take it? Can he truly take it and accept a future without you?

Tonowari’s face is suddenly caressed by Ronal. He looks at her in confusion and she just pushes the hair out of his face.

“When they return, they will know of the adoration we have for them,” she says quietly yet her yearning for you that he also feels is apparent, “We will them of beautiful they are, how they fill us with Atokirina. How much love we carry and drown for her.”

She says what he promised her word for word and he chuckles. He catches her hands and he kisses the knuckles of one of her hands. He squeezes the other hand thrice and finishes his promise to her.

“When [Name] returns, they will finally see how we see them.” No. He cannot just accept that you despise him now without telling him any reason why. He cannot just accept that he is nothing to you so easily. He does not want months of avoidance to happen again and perhaps turn into years of pretending he and Ronal does not exist. He will not give in to the voices that cloud his head for he knows you and you could never hate him. You care about him and Ronal too much and he wishes that it is the same care he and her have for you. Even if he did, he will not risk losing the chance of losing you and a future with you because he loves you. Ronal loves you.

“I see you,” he says to Ronal with eyes full of gratefulness that she snapped him out of his spiralling thoughts and love for her.

“I see you,” she replies with the same eyes that make his heart skip a beat. 

He just hopes that you still see both of them and see them the way they see you.

.

.

.

You are cruel. So, so cruel, Ronal thought as she watches you ignore her. When she talked to you after your disappearance, you acted like there was a barrier between the two of you. You placed a vast distance from her and it tore her heart, clawed it open and you left her to bleed so openly when you left and you didn’t even look back once. The pain from the worry and agony for your safety turned into a burning one that fills her lungs with smoke. Why? What did she do for you to despise being in her presence? Has she scared you as well? Have you grown tired of her as well?

She thought this time would be different. That you would be different. That she has finally found love in Tonowari and you and everything will be all and well. That she wouldn’t hurt anyone again, especially you who is one of the most beloved to her. Was everything a lie then? You said that this time would be different. You said that you were here for her. You said you see her. Was it all just a lie?

No, she silently scoffs to herself. She knows you and she sees you. You are kind. You have a big heart. You see everyone. Perhaps you just didn’t see her anymore. Perhaps it was truly her fault that made you turn away from her just like everybody else.

Disgusting. And so, so pathetic. Had she really not learned anything at all? How could she do that to you unknowingly? How could she hurt you, you who is one of the most precious to her? She does not deserve you, you who is so bright and so full of life and love and all she had done is hurt you. Is this Eywa’s punishment for her? For all the sins she had done in the past, all to return and come back to return in the name of [Name]?

“This time will be different, Ronal.” You said, bringing her face in front of yours. You wiped away her tears and assured her. “I’m here for you.”

“I see you.”

Your words ran through Rona’s mind and oh, despite it all, she still wants you. She still believes that you are different. She still believes that you still see her. She would never give up on you just like you had never given up on her when she didn’t want you to see her. She looks at you in your ethereal beauty that knocks the air out of her and she feels herself falling in love again. You stand there like Eywa’s most treasured creation of all time with the way all of life surrounds you. She looks at the three beads you hold in the palm of your hands and wonders if she and Tonowari would be a part of your waytelem. She finds herself envying the wind that ripples through your hair and clothes and is closer and touches you the way he wants to be with you.

And so, she tells Tonowari and tells him how you will know the wind and the ocean that carries their love for you and grips Tonowari’s hand and would not let him give up on you as well.

“Greetings, brother, Ronal,” a friend of Tonowari’s suddenly cut off her thoughts she lets go of Tonowari’s hand. She nods at him while he greeted him back.

“To what do I owe the pleasure of having my brother here before me?” Tonowari chuckles.

“I just wanted to give you my congratulations for completing Iknimaya, our future Olo’eyktan,” his friend grins to him and nods at her, “And of course, our future Tsahìk.”

She frowns at this. What future Tsahìk? She was not aware of this nor the Tsahìk had personally told her of this. She looks at Tonowari with a questioning gaze.

“Future Tsahìk? When did you learn of this?” his eyebrows press into a flat line while his ears twitched.

“Everyone knows this, brother. In fact, we are all surprised [Name] wasn’t chosen,” he told them and realization dawns on Ronal. Do you know of this as well? Is this the reason why you were avoiding them?

Ronal looks at Tonowari with wide eyes. Tonowari grips her hand and looks at her and tells her with his eyes that they both need to talk to you quickly. Perhaps his friend had sensed that there was something wrong as he apologized and asked if he was in the wrong.

“No, no, thank you for telling me this, brother,” Tonowari pats his shoulder and sends him a strained smile, “I’m sorry but Ronal and I need to go now. I will make it up to you soon.”

She and he nods at him before they go to where you were before. You were not there anymore. Panic swells in her chest as the seconds go by she could not see you. She sees a common friend you and her shared and she quickly calls her over.

“Greetings, Ronal and Tonowari. Congratulations on your Iknimaya!” she beams at her.

“Greetings. I’m sorry but there is an urgent matter I need to attend to. Have you seen [Name]?” she hastily says and concern quickly washes over her friend’s face.

“Oh, I think she left early. Why, had something happened?”

“Thank you. There is just something we need to talk to her. I’ll see you soon.” She nods at her and calls for Ilus nearby. As they swim towards her and Tonowari, she cannot help but the questions that plague her mind. What if they were too late and you refuse to hear them out? What if you hate them for the betrayal you must have felt? What if—

“Ronal,” Tonowari grabs caresses her face with one hand and squeezes her hand with another. “Deep breaths. Breathe.”

She looks at him, frustration welling up in her eyes and she bites her lip. “[Name] sees you. She sees us.”

“What if she doesn’t anymore?” she asks the question that gives them immense pain to even think about. What if? What then?

Tonowar’s eyes soften and he tries to hide his flinch. He is silent and both of them could only cling desperately to the hope that you still do.

Oh, Eywa, she begs, Please help them see our innermost thoughts and the sincerity we have in our souls.

Please let them know of the wind and the ocean that calls out their name.

Please let them still see us.

series-taglist: (tumblr won't let me tag some blogs so if you changed your username, please lmk!) @totesnothere04 @ducks118 @narutoboi @yeosxxx @fanboyluvr @ladylovegood-69 @northsoulss @thatfictionalwh0re @ghostlyworld @toodaloo432 @lovefromjazzy @greendino7 @neteyamforlife @vermilionzombie @vxncxntt @adaiasafira @tsuteysyawntu @mooniequeen @eywas-heir @arminsgfloll @dev1lm4n @myh3artttt @thehoneymushroomhealer @delightcandlelight @shadowmoonlight0604 @dae-dreamer @buttercup-beeee

[monsterswithimagines]

Undisclosed Desires - Part 11

Joe Goldberg x female!Reader

Summary: Twenty minutes before he would have met Guinevere Beck, Joe meets you instead. You intruige him, but it will soon become clear that there is something off about you.

Words: 951

Masterlist

Guysssss I'm sorry if this sucks. I spent all day at the office wishing I could write and then I got home and people just would NOT leave me alone and I had to keep taking breaks 😭😭. Also I kind of didn't know how I wanted this chapter to go at all but now that I'm past it I'll probably have less trouble.

I'm not mad, (Y/n).

It's been three days and you're still avoiding me, but I'm so not mad that I give Ethan a raise and that I buy Paco dinner twice and that I smile at everyone who walks into Mooney’s. That's how you know I love you: I understand that you need time and space to figure out how you feel. And I can wait. And I don't take it out on others. Love is patient, after all.

And this is love. I know it is. You said I am great, and cute, and ugh, and that means something. But you said it yourself: you are ruining this by avoiding me. And when I text you, you're short with me. Why are you doing this to us? Are you the kind of girl who sabotages good things?

Then you finally text me properly. It's a long string of texts, and I want to ignore you because I'm not mad, but I'm a little disappointed in you, honestly, and I think that's fair. But the more I read, the more I smile, and I know I will not ignore you.

YOU: ok im so sorry i know iv been super distant and rude and that is totally on me and id love to tell u iv just been busy or whatever but the truth is actually that i've kind of been avoiding you?? i know i know im a mega bitch. plz forgive me 🙏🏻

YOU: but heres the thing iv never??? done this before??? like gone on dates and gotten drunk and spilled my guts to a guy and liked a guy

YOU: like this is so embarrassing bc i might just be making a super big deal out of nothing

YOU: iv had like six coffees today im sorry im not making sense

YOU: iv never had a boyfriend before and i dont have any other friends here and also im kind of like. super insecure??? so

YOU: you can interrupt me any minute now

YOU: pls

ME: Just give me a moment.

Ethan isn't here to watch the register but honestly, (Y/n)? I don't care. There's only two people in the store and they've both been browsing forever. They're just going to end up buying books they will never read, so I go into the office and close the door behind me. And then I call you.

You answer right away.

“Hey, you,” you say, embarrassed.

“You should have too much coffee more often,” I tell you.

“Uh, no, never again. I have a horrible headache.”

“I'm sorry.”

“It's okay,” you assure me. I hear something slam in the background. “Oops.”

“What are you doing?”

“Just rearranging my furniture.”

“Okay. Why?”

“I'm having a… day,” you say. “Sometimes I just have these moments where I have to change something about my life right this second, you know?”

“So you rearrange your furniture and you text guys illiterate love confessions.”

“Illiterate!” you exclaim. “I will have you know I am a copywriter, and I'm very good at my job.”

“Uh huh.”

“My failure to capitalize my texts is entirely on purpose.”

“Right.”

“And so is the lack of commas.”

I keep quiet, and you realize that I called what you sent me a love confession. You don't correct me because you do love me. You do.

“So,” you say. “Thoughts?”

“I like you. I think that's pretty clear. I went to a music festival with you, and the music was terrible.”

You laugh.

“But I don't want to push you into anything. Have you really never had a boyfriend?”

“Well, there was this boy at summer camp when I was twelve. We held hands on the swings and he shared his Nintendo with me. But I don't think that counts.” I've never wanted to kill a twelve-year-old boy before. “Then there was a girl when I was fifteen. I liked her but it turned out she was just, like, experimenting. So was I, really. We lasted two weeks.”

A girl, huh? This isn't something I expected. But I don't react, because I know you want me to react, and you also don't always like to get what you want right away.

“But no,” you conclude. “I've never actually dated anyone before. That doesn't mean you're pushing me.”

You are so brave, (Y/n). You've never been in love with anyone before but here you are, taking charge.

On your end of the phonecall, something else slams. Then something shatters. You curse and someone knocks on the office window, and I hold up my finger at him to indicate one minute.

“Hey,” I say. “Do you want me to come over and help? After work, I mean.”

“No. I mean, yes to coming over, but no to helping. I'll just get annoyed because you're not doing it exactly how I want it to be done.”

“I'll just bring food, then.”

Another kock at the window. I'm going to kill this guy.

“Great! I'm craving pizza,” you say.

“Pizza it is. Toppings?”

“Pepperoni. And jalapenos.”

“You got it.”

“See you tonight, Joe,” you say, but what you really mean is I love you.

We hang up and I go help the man. I am so nice to him, because you have invited me to your apartment. You want me there. You want me to sit on your bed and feed you and watch you move your books around because you love me, and you told me you've never had a boyfriend before which means you think I am your boyfriend now.

Closing time can't come soon enough.

[valeriele3]

Hello hellooo~ How's your day? Hope It's been good!

I see that you write for Enstars?

I've read the rules so here I am..! If what I'm about to request though violates a rule whatsoever please ignore/delete this request

If it doesn't bother you too much..Can I please request a yandere or self-aware (Or maybe both yandere and self-aware combined?) Ritsu Sakuma x Reader?

~Sincerely, Ritsu simp Rin <3

Ritsu Sakuma x GN!Reader

Warnings: Yandere, ooc, mention of harm that can be inflicted physically or mentally and mentions of a nasty co-worker

Summary: Ritsu’s jealousy and anger got the best of him

Hi hiii~ Don’t worry as you didn’t violate a rule and the self-aware/Yandere isss part of what I accept soo it’s alright

Also this may or may not have some things that happened to me in-game cough cough the start cough cough

I apologize for the ooc and hope you enjoy this <3

Btw..Important A/N in the end and apologies in advance for the massive cringe that’ll bring you back to 2018 or smth

“I swear if they do the La Mort event next..”

“Sigh..It’s because of that Limited Chiaki and the current collab that I lost my savings..”

“My poor beloved Ritsu..I’m so so sorry”

In the screen Ritsu seems to be asleep but in reality..Ritsu is awake

Ritsu was and still is listening to his beloved darling go on about how they lost their saving

Ritsu looks calm and peaceful on the screen but inside he is fuming with anger, annoyance, and jealousy

‘Tch..Those diamonds were meant for ME and ME only..! It isn’t fair! They used up everything in the Antique’s Fair event too..What’s so great about those two? They already have my cards, isn’t that enough?!’

‘But..At least they didn’t pull in that bastards fc’

‘No matter. They’ll be in my arms and mine alone soon’

‘Just wait for me darling. I’ll come get you soon’

“The heck? Why’d Ritsu laugh out of no where lmao”

‘Oops’

“Hmm..Judging from the line of events in the JP one the La Mort event is still super far off..The one with Little Romance will even come first..”

“WAIT NO! FUCK! THE ART OF RITSU IN THAT IS ONE THAT A 5 STAR CARD HAS FUCK FUCK FUCK IM SO FUCKED! MY BELOVED IM SO SO SORRY!!”

‘Sigh..They’re panicking again. But, I’m glad that’s how much they love and care about me..’

‘Maybe we really are meant to be..No, we are meant to be’

‘Maybe I should..’

“Eh? HappyEle you are the absolute best! Ehehehheeheh another free 10 scouts for me~!”

“ ‘Due to some issues with [KNIGHTS] Ritsu Sakuma’s voice lines we have issued out free 10x Idol Jewel (Ritsu Sakuma). We apologize for any inconvenience’ Sweet! And ten too!”

‘Do you like my gifts darling? Hopefully you won’t find it too suspicious if I were to send in some more’

Ritsu says to himself as he watches you peacefully sleep after a long day of work

“Looking at your face calms me down..I swear, I hate that guy so much! Can’t he see no one likes him? Everyone in the office avoids that bastard yet he still can’t see it. He’s so lucky he’s my superior, if not I would’ve punched him so many times already”

‘This person again..I swear I’ll kill him.’

‘How DARE he touch what’s mine’

‘That’s it. Tomorrow. I’ll do it tomorrow, I simply can’t wait anymore’

“Another day, another grind”

“Hm? Is Ritsu glitching? Love? You okay?”

“I’m alright, Darling”

“Huh? Wha—”

Soo..Yeah..I got lazy..Please take this cringe Yandere Ritsu (ㆀ˘･з･˘)

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Important A/N: I KNOW THAT’S YOU! You can’t hide yourself from me “Rin”. Don’t you “I see you write for Enstars?” Me, you know I do (⌒▽⌒) Also pls give me back my Ritsu keychain

[popponn]

hi dear, hru? if i could eat your theme for breakfast, lunch and dinner I'd die a happy human it's super cute and crunchy even though i forever will memorise the green themes you'll still manage to pull it off

BUT i genuinely need your opinion on bllk side characters (shidou, ness, aiku, barou and maybe karasu) rate them spell your favourite and last favourites because I'm ready to set up a chair with side of tea and listen to them rambles :3

im currently running away from deadline hello. pls don't tell them im here bae : D (i really need to lock in);;;; my love, as someone whose country is full of sour strawberries you kinda scare me. but i heard overseas strawberries are sweet tho so!!! also girl :(( im :((( wait im bad with praises but pls know i love ur themes and u especially skskdhfsf

now. to my bullshit. (please do know YOU are asking for this okay ^^) so while i put my yappings down the read more to spare some poor souls, tldr: honestly i cant really pick faves simply because my ass is indecisive as hell and i constantly switch rankings lololol and like when it comes to fictional character honestly as long as they manage to catch my eyes (whether by being amusing, complicated and so on) they are immediately an okay to me. and bllk is pretty good at making entertaining charas no matter how much of an asshole they are. so, yeah, this ranking rn is more of "what i can see from whatever spotlight was given to them and how much it makes my personal taste raises an eyebrow character-wise rn": aiku > shidou > ness = barou > karasu (give crow man more spotlight im begging)

shidou: honestly he is like. a force of nature himself. and also remember that one trivia on why he cries? yeah, that trivia honestly raise him up so much in my eyes it's kinda insane. but he is hard to write because i do n o t get him. i wish i do tho, he seems interesting and he praised isagi. already a pretty cool guy in my book, if we ignore the whole other package on the side but hey what is someone without spice. solid 8/10. the fact the first person he really kinda gets on with was sae is also hilarious. like talk about not seeing it coming. common knowledge that bllk side charas deserves more screentime bUT BOY. does this guy really deserve and need it (going back to isagi for a bit but i really want to see isagi work with types he really clashes with like shidou and reo. not even as a simp, but isg is our main pov so. like. isagi dissect this guy's brain pls. or hey light novel pls)

ness: despite his whole relationship with isagi i don't wanna deck him the same way i do to kaiser. absolute soggy wet meow meow to me, whoever calls him babygirl has taste. if i have to say anything is that i really hope his growth will be outside of kaiser. when a character is connected to much to another character in a canon setting, let's just say i can see why people like it but i prefer it when the narrative forces them to face the horror and save themselves in one way. honestly, a goofy guy who i wish to see develop more in the same way barou did. like we know kaiser will (unless the plot twist is twisting) but seeing a character like him who gets stereotyped as a "masochistic, dependent sidekick" by most getting more dimension and spotlight? yeah honestly i really want that. but for now... yeah im sorry but my personal score is 6/10 (but i really hope he will rise up because him being a dark horse in the narrative will be a breath of fresh air honestly)

aiku: i left bllk the first time right before u20 so let me tell you how amused i am when this guy is more than what i expected. if bllk wc team doesn't have him as captain im asking ego WHY. like as a captain? aiku really got my respect. like his canon cheating aside, one of the most decent dudes who can admit their faults out loud. if bllk was about defender instead of striker he would SHINE as a main rival. he kinda already does tho. the whole cop roleplay with isagi was so funny in an amusing way. honestly i really like his writing as a character. very mature, but his selfish bet was really telling of the another side of his character too. 7.5/10. minus point because i cant write him and im mad about it!!! (aka in all serious: 8.5)

barou: first time reading bllk, when isagi chose him i think it becomes one of those moments that really cements bllk. like?? the canon fodder villain who usually was just relevant in the first arc???? become one of the main rivals now???? also he is so housewife and why lmao. also put him and rin in a room. it will either end with a massacre or just them ignoring each other. honestly tho, he is funny to me because this guy has the Deep Voice but then he opens his mouth, call himself king, also dye his hair before uber vs bm match, and i remember how he truly is lmao. also the bowling and his whole dynamic with nagi are so entertaining. like nagi doesn't have to try to piss him off. hilarious. as a chara, 7/10, minus point simply because while dating him in rl sounds like a healthier option, i like my man a blaring red flag. on field a 9/10 because his whole asshole personality comes out and things get interesting

karasu: this guy is like. i am really mixed about him because i think fanon give him more dimension and raises more interesting points than canon has done him so far. but honestly, considering self aware he was and the rare moments the series gave him? he is an interesting character to have in a sport manga. this guy is realistic as shit, and he is also very self-aware of his own downsides. like. read his trivia. this guy is interesting honestly. another one i wish will work with isagi simply just to see more of him. also he is such a little shit but he is funny about it so it's okay. so, yeah, canon wise i don't really can say much about him (yet? idk). but there is this version of him i seen in a gen fic from the red white holy websites of fanfic that just makes me: yo. i wanna see more spotlight on this crow. so uhhhh 6/10 too?

[steverogrers]

Ptolemaea | Bucky Barnes x Reader

Bucky Barnes x Demon!Reader

WARNINGS: Demons, graphic gore, blood, and sex. Please tread carefully if you have a weak stomach. If you're under 18 TURN YO ASS AROUND AND DO NOT READ.

Listening to: Ptolemaea by Ethel Cain

Summary: Bucky finally submits to the demon in his bedroom.

(Pls don't judge me, I know this seems really gross but I'm sorry. I clearly got problems I need to work through.)

__________________________________

Tonight the hour goes by slowly, and the heat prolongs it even more. This, paired with the loud cicadas just outside the window, produces nauseating insomnia.

The Louisiana heat is unbearable, and it makes Bucky just irate enough that he huffs as he rips his t-shirt off and throws it somewhere into the darkness of the small bedroom.

Sarah, Sam's sister, had been kind enough to let him stay there instead of him having to sleep at a local motel. This was good news for he could save some cash and was able to share time with Sam and his nephews, who all grew fond of Bucky.

But, the air conditioner of the house isn't doing too well in keeping the super soldier cool in the midst of the Louisiana summer. He'd even slid one of the smaller windows open a bit, to let a small breeze in.

So the bedroom, dark and small, is a bit heavy and warm, accompanied by the occasional cooler breeze coming in through the cracked window. Outside the window, somewhere on the pond nearby, Bucky listens to the cicadas and other night animals.

Usually, he isn't one to complain so much, but tonight feels a bit hellish.

Sleep is not kind to him and it keeps its distance from him as he tosses and turns about in the small bed. He kicks the sheets off and stares up at the ceiling.

The rest of the house is silent by now as everyone had gone off to bed hours earlier.

Then, the cicadas outside the window stop in unison, and the breeze disappears.

The clock across the room, hanging on the wall, reads 3:30.

The dog tags around his neck tighten, and his eyelids flutter shut as he submits.

Bucky knows the drill.

This is a nightly occurrence, but the dread it causes never ceases to emerge.

He feels the tightening of the chain around his neck and tries not to panic.

The slow and rhythmic scratching on the floor beneath the bed startles him only slightly, and the sound of the bed creaking at his feet startles him too. Whoever...whatever, has come up from below must see the thick drops of sweat forming on his forehead, and must see the panic as his eyes flutter quickly behind his shut eyelids.

"Look."

Usually, the voice is akin to static, a mixture of deep and contorted voices in one.

But, tonight, the voice is softer, feminine.

Still, he doesn't look.

Hot, rough flesh grabs at the skin of his legs as the creature climbs up the bed, claws digging into Bucky's flesh and leaving behind light burns.

And then, right above his chest, the beast sits.

"Look."

Bucky can't remember the creature ever sounding like that. Nor can he remember the creature ever staying this long, sitting on his chest, watching.

Usually, the creature visits for a moment and leaves when Bucky ignores it.

So, Bucky panics and breathes a bit faster, the creature heavy on his chest. He isn't sure how big the beast is, for it feels small enough to cover his belly and chest, but it feels heavy enough to weigh more than a ton.

He can hear something else outside the window, something akin to weeping and crying, but it is far away. The air grows thicker and warmer, and the bed beneath him has sunken significantly from the weight of the beast.

He doesn't want to look.

But, going against the creature's demand feels so wrong, and Bucky trusts his instincts.

He opens his eyes, and the blurriness blocks the beast for a second, and then...there it sits, watching Bucky, looking down at him.

Bucky's stomach tightens and his heart comes to a frightened halt.

He's not sure if he just wet the bed.

The beast is...a woman. A terrifying, demonic, woman.

She is perched on his chest like a gargoyle, and the top of her head is adorned by caprinae horns. The skin on her body is smooth and glistens slightly beneath the moonlight from the window.

The demonic smile on her face shows a set of sharpened teeth and a black, serpent tongue. But, in particular, it is the black eyes that set him on fire.

They pierce into his soul, and he can't look away.

Not even when she tilts her head, or when her form unfurls so that she can place her knees on either side of his belly.

Bucky's breathing quickens as his lips quiver, and he musters up whatever strength the fear hasn't ripped away to speak, "W-What are you?"

"I've been with you forever," The beast speaks, its voice gentle, but it sounds deceiving. Not to be trusted, "Every night. Right there."

She raises a finger and points a long black nail behind her slightly.

Bucky follows, and his eyes fall on a simple black corner swallowed by darkness.

She is always in the darkness.

When he shifts his gaze to her again, he finds she doesn't blink.

He also finds that she is...ethereal.

Long black hair falls past her shoulders and down past her rounded hips. Long dirty nails dig into his chest slightly as she merely watches him, and cold feet touch his thighs.

She is unnerving, but he can't help the way it makes him feel.

I've been with you forever

She is a constant.

"You are a godless man. A sinner. Delicious."

"So you're a demon?"

"Daughter of Lilith and Asmodeus. And you," She lowers her head slightly to his, her nose practically on his, "Are mine."

This immediately sends a shiver down Bucky's spine as he looks up at her, gaze unwavering.

The bare flesh of her breasts press into the warmth and sweat of his chest, and the heat between her legs rests atop his lower belly. The hands against his chest are hot enough to leave burn marks where they touch.

Though it should be uncomfortable, the pain and sizzle bring Bucky a reprieve from long-lost emptiness. It catches Bucky off guard slightly and embarrasses him.

The beast notices and snarls, "You are disgusting, just like I thought."

But she knows what her touch is doing because as she trails her claws down his chest and abdomen, she watches him and stares as he hisses.

He finds that he can't move his hands, or his legs, and is stuck beneath her. Yet, he doesn't fight it as she digs her claws into the lower part of his belly, which is soft and supple.

Bucky looks down as he realizes she isn't releasing any weight or pressure, and she pushes down further. He looks up at her again, pleading with her.

"Stop," He chants.

The flesh of his belly gives in as her claws rip into the flesh, drawing blood once more.

Bucky screams and throws his head back into the pillow, now fighting to flail and kick his legs and throw his arms, but nothing moves.

"You're fighting me," She speaks, and the last word is dripping in malice and violence, "The more you fight, the more it will hurt. Be my guest."

She digs again, and Bucky feels like he is about to black out.

She watches as the length of her claws dig perfectly into his flesh, slowly bringing out more and more blood before she stops.

He is sweating and crying, now, but realizes that it isn't pain.

It doesn't hurt, at all. It is a light tickle, perhaps, but there is no pain as she digs into his belly.

It is sheer fear.

"I told you, stop fighting me."

He does. He submits to the carnivorous beast above him, confused and afraid.

The hot flesh between her legs had caused enough friction to have aroused him, and the claws in the flesh of his belly caused enough pain and sharp torture to...what is that feeling?

"What are you doing to me?" He cries out quietly, watching as she brought her hands back up to her face, lapping at pools of dark blood before dipping her head to the opening at his lower belly.

"Helping you."

Bucky doesn't have time to question the beast's response before she slips a tongue into the gore, fingers working to pull down the pants that hug his hips.

He doesn't know why, but he moves his hips slightly up into her face, and the feeling of her inside him, in his belly, drives him crazy. He is ashamed, but...

The demon sits up, blood dripping from her lips and she smiles at him as she crawls back up to his face. He is now writhing in what he presumes is arousal, not pain, beneath her. He finds himself eager now and lifts his head slightly to capture her wet and sticky lips in his.

As she pulls away, he finds cool comfort in his arm as he leans his head to the side, watching as she lowers her face past his belly, finally pulling his pants all the way down.

When the pants slip down his hips, the beast hisses as Bucky's erection springs free and hits his belly before standing back up. Bucky watches her closely again, in slight fear that she will tear him apart, and in hope that she will.

But instead, she eyes him from behind his cock, and wraps her hand around his girth, gripping it tightly. He watches as she lowers her head and drags her nose up its length, breathing him in.

"You pissed yourself."

"I'm scared."

At this, the demon's laugh deepens for just a few seconds, and he hears the Devil in the laugh before it dissipates once more.

"I would be ashamed if you weren't."

The beast lifts her head and her body up his, angling his cock at the base of her entrance.

Bucky can feel an intense warmth from within her and is now finding himself eager to feel it around him.

She is hot, seething, even, as she lowers herself onto him.

Bucky gasps, now finding his hands have been freed from whatever was confining them earlier. In desperation, he reaches up and wraps a strong grip around her hips. The skin is hot, and he flinches slightly before touching her again.

No, he grips her.

His fingers dig hard into her supple flesh drawing blood, but she shows no remorse or pain as she slowly moves.

The beast wraps a strong grip around Bucky's throat, and Bucky moves his head to the side, fighting it. This earns him a hard slap, and Bucky shoots her a wild gaze.

"I am fucking you. You are mine. I am not yours."

At this, Bucky nods slowly, unable to say much as she quickens her pace and readjusts her grip around his throat. Bucky finds heat in this once he accepts its confines and restrictive feeling, and groans as the heat of her body escalates around him.

His hands hold her steady and he watches as she remains calm and steady, only small breaths leaving her lips and small chants occasionally bubbling up in her throat as he bucks up into her.

He doesn't know why, but the image is beautiful.

The horns on her head, the long hair falling down her hips, the murderous and unnerving eyes, the hot and supple flesh of her body, and the mound of hair beneath her belly.

Bucky doesn't know what it is in him but seeing the beast begin to enjoy herself, and hearing as she no longer tries to muffle her pleasure, makes his hips shoot up sporadically, and his grip on her hips brings her down each time.

The demon releases his throat and comes down to press her lips against his neck, to which he leans into her touch.

Then, he feels her teeth sink into the flesh, then the tendons, and he groans into the darkness as she moans ferally, eating at his throat and drinking his blood.

His arms wrap around the small of her back as she feasts on him once more, and he drives his cock into the beast with all of his might.

Bloody, sweaty, and afraid, Bucky's hips meet hers in a sporadic pattern as he cums in her heat. The friction pulling at his dick is overwhelming, and the feeling of her eating from him is too, and Bucky cries out and cums again.

Once she pulls from his throat, she presses a sloppy kiss to his lips, blood spilling into his mouth.

He drinks it and relishes the fact that it tastes nothing like blood.

When she pulls away from the kiss, he stares into her eyes as she stares into his.

"You are my favorite." The beast's voice is no longer soft or feminine. It is deep and haunting, promising fright.

Before Bucky processes the change in tone, the beast slithers off of Bucky. Cum spills from between her legs as she stands beside his bed. Bucky turns his head slightly to watch her, and she stares at him.

After a second, the woman morphs, revealing a form of a sabbatic goat. Bucky's body enters another spurt of panic and fear.

He watches as the beast moves into the dark corner that it had pointed to earlier, and it looks at Bucky once more.

The hand on the clock moves to 3:31 AM, and the breeze returns through the window.

The darkness in the corner empties and the beast is gone once more.

Bucky isn't given space or time to panic or ponder over what demonic force had just had its way with him before a deep, overpowering sleep takes over.

-------------------------------------------

The next morning, he wakes with dried cum in his pants, and the smell of bacon cooking downstairs. His head is a bit foggy.

He gets out of bed and shuts the window before he dresses for a quick breakfast.

As he undresses, he watches his figure in the mirror of the small bedroom.

On his lower belly is a scar, and on the side of his throat is a scar too. And, he realizes, in his mouth, a long black hair.

He pulls and pulls until the hair is out.

He drops it and stares at it on the wooden floor.

It sizzles and melts into the wooden planks.

Bucky stares at it for a second longer before he looks into the mirror once more. Behind his shoulders, he catches sight of a pair of horns. But, when he turns there is nothing.

There is a warmth in his belly once more, and he leaves the bedroom.

He meets the Wilson family downstairs with a smile on his face, all unknowing of the horned beast watching Bucky from every mirror.

(Will be posted on my AO3 https://archiveofourown.org/users/burgersfromspace)

[tonycries]

HI DADDY TONYY I GOT SOME TEA FOR YEW WIT SPECIFIC DATES TOO 👅👅

so I've been friends with this guy for about 5ish 6ish years now and we basically talked on and off. I remember at one point in January of this year (this all happened this year), we started talking, and then I confessed to him in February that I was developing feelings for him. THIS MF ISTG DIDN'T EVEN SAY SHIT. He didn't validate my feelings or turn me down. All he told me was "I'm proud of you for admitting this to me."

And me, of course, I'm not taking a silent response for an answer, so I kept asking him for an answer, and he told me "I kind of have feelings for you too." KEYWORD KIND OF!! One thing I might add, we live in the same state, but different cities not too far apart.

And from there on, we would flirt and stuff but there wasn't an actual label between us so idek what we were. Well, he started talking to me less, stopped responding quick, and at one point, he left me on delivered for a WHOLE WEEK. I even remember wanting to meet up in person with him, and I told him. He said he'll ask his grandma, and he never did. I did some digging that day, and apparently he was HAVING SHOTS ON TOP OF A ROOF WITH HIS FRIENDS.

I really don't know how I gave this bitch multiple chances, but I did 😞. But it was my turn to step it up. I started leaving him on seen, becoming dry, and responding late. And I even argued with him about 3 times after this happened about separate occasions. Then FINALLY, I ended things with him in May. I still kept him in my DMs, just in case he wanted to apologize or something.

And then my dumbass did something I will always regret. I reconnected with him. (pls don't throw tomatoes ☹️) I decided to push this all aside and reconnect with him again. But this time, I wasn't all happy and silly, I was more of a dry responder, setting boundaries. Then, he started doing the same thing to me again. Leaving me on delivered, and becoming dry. And at that point, I gave up. I literally just stopped texting and kept him in my DMs. I basically never blocked him and documented every happy moment in my life just to piss him off because he sometimes would try to talk to me. Like one time, he asked me if I was AWAKE AT 12AM ON A SCHOOL DAY and I said no at 9AM LOL.

THEN (it's almost over I'm so sorry) LAST MONTH (September) he messaged me, in a way, kind of apologizing, but also not really and more like justifying his actions, saying "his mental health was bad and that no one basically cares about him and that HE STILL LOVES ME." (LMAO "STILL LOVES ME" PLEASE) Omfg I literally recall offering him help and he DECLINED. But anyways, I just basically told him that the damage was done and after that he left me on seen. Kinda giving, "Heh.. THIS will teach her!" But yea.

Haven't blocked him only for my follower count as well as to get a good laugh in for when I'm down. (IM SO SORRY IF THIS WAS SUPER LONG I JS WANTED TO GET THIS OFF MY CHEST. LOVE YOU ALPHA DADDY TONY!! ❤️ HAVE A GOOD DAY/AFTERNOON/NIGHT <3)

- 🔮

OMG NAWRRRR 🔮 NONNIE YOU DESERVE SM BETTER 😭😭 The audacity of some men, I will never get over.

And I really do feel for his mental health struggles - I really do - but mental health struggles don't make him ignore you to have a bro's night while pretending he's at his grandma's 💀 that's diabolical.

SMH situationships are the messiest nonnie I'm sending you all the love and manifesting whatever alpha daddy Wattpad love interest (/hj) you want comes your want <33 And that this time they treat you like the queen you are mhm 😋

[96ymh]

hihi everyone it's kira and i'm here to bring you mr yoo "idk i just work here" minhyuk aka the university librarian!! under the cut are a few bullet points abt his past and personality but generally, his mind tends to be a little bit here and there for personal reasons (aka he's deluded himself into thinking he's content with his life) but he's v diligent with his work so chances are you've probably run into him at the library and he's refused to write off your one day late library book :^) i'm super excited to meet you all get the ball rolling so pls feel free to dm me or like this post and i'll dm u <3

background - only son to the yoos, a family of extremely wealthy lawyers and mugunghwa natives (though he personally does not act like it) so you'd expect him to be doted on but

was neglected heavily by his parents until he showed signs of childhood pyromania around the age of five/six, after which they stuck him in every counselling service possible. not really the epitome of familial love

although the fires he started didn't hurt anyone except himself and they were kept a secret within the family, word leaked out to the yoos' extended family (including the nams) and he was essentially ostracised by his aunts and uncles, being the subject of conversation every family event he dared to turn up to

his parents unsurprisingly lost any semblance of fondness they had for him, particularly when he showed no signs of academic excellence and instead preferred to spend his day painting, not really having an aim in life like the rest of his cousins. his parents often reminded him that he wasn't as talented as his great great grandmother, which unsurprisingly did little to affect him

(tw parental death) just sort of got used to being there like an unwanted addition, the classic black sheep of the family trudging his way through high school with absolutely no dreams or aspirations until his parents abruptly die when he's seventeen in a car accident

at this point, his pyromania had been cured long ago but his extended family members used it as an excuse to get disinherit him from the lineage like they wanted to all along, leaving him with only his family home and 0 time to grieve

barely managed to graduate high school tbh and worked odd jobs around the town before living in the house alone finally got too much and he packed up to move to seoul, where he continued to be a busybody

busybody meaning he rented out some tiny one bedroom apartment with windows that didn't close properly and picked up every part time job possible, living paycheck to paycheck, painting with shitty 10,000 won paintbrushes in his spare time

decided to move back to mugunghwa a couple of years ago and picked up a job as the full-time (🎉🎉🎉) librarian at the uni! currently living at his family home which he really really hates but when he's not working, spends the day doodling on every surface of his house

sort of regrets letting his family kick him out that easily and he wishes he would've made more of an effort because life for the past nine years has been almost unbearably hard, though he'll never admit it. can't really afford to go back into education but thinks being able to read books for free all day is close enough so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

that's pretty much it up until the fire which he was honestly the luckiest victim of (sorry jisoo 😵‍💫 and gws mina 😵‍💫) didn't know jisoo too well so he isn't affected on a personal level but definitely shaken by the events and the resurgence of fire in his life has left him feeling more antsy than usual. if you ask him about that night, 9/10 chances he'll lie and tell you he doesn't remember anything. the remaining 1/10 is when he ignores your question and tells you your book is overdue

personality wise - someone who's given up is the easiest way to describe him. think early morning cigarettes, the faintest traces of paint smudged across his fingers, a heavily read book with cracks down its spine and yellowing pages, keeping the windows open even when it's raining, the sound of waves crashing against the shore, feeling your hands go numb from the cold

pessimistic beyond words, though that stems more from the events of his life than something innate in him. withdrawn because he's sort of been alone for almost a decade and communicating with others is still new to him though human interaction is something he craves, aloof in the sense that he never seems to be quite here. seems constantly lost in his thoughts but is perceptive and picks up on things melting away into the background, including the group of students who just tried to sneak tteokkbokki into the quiet study room

most of his work hours are spent reading books at the counter or putting returned books back into their places on bookshelves. rarely starts a conversation first. sits on campus during his lunch break and has developed a habit of watching the students live their lives with a vague sense of jealousy, particularly towards the red and green club

sort of just feels stuck in his life. there's nothing propelling him forwards or backwards but instead of admitting that he's hopeless, he tells himself that he should be content with what he has

has probably also eaten every brand of ramen and triangle gimbap so if you want suggestions he's the guy

if you recognise him from high school he will do a terrible job of pretending he's a different yoo minhyuk

[naitosutan]

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR SWEET RESPONSE!! 🍭🍭

(I didn't know how to respond to your tags on your reblog so I thought I would just send you an ask-)

I'm glad you thought I had some good concepts, I'm terrible at explaining things so it's nice to know that some people understood what I was getting at. And your tsum tsum steek drawing lives rent free in my head, it is so fricking cute. I love tsum tsums!! And I was glad I could influence your love of Steek, kvasgi's art of Steek was one of the first pieces of art for that ship that I saw which was part of the reason why I got into the ship too! And your sister's art is super cute as well, I love it all so much, especially her AU!

Since I'm here, I'd like to ask you, who are your favorite characters and what are your favorite ships?

Thanks again for the sweet response, have a great day!! ❤️❤️

@/steeklover AHH I’M SO SORRY I FOOLISHLY SAVED YOUR ASK AS A DRAFT ON MOBILE AND TUMBLR ATE IT 😭 Luckily, I had part of my response written already and I’ll try to reply as best I can to what I remember of your ask!

Did you know I’m a fool and inept at anything technology ._. I found the ask; somehow I saved the ask in my drafts completely separate from my response ahskkgj

Pls forgive me for the repost, I wanted to keep the original ask attached 🙇🏻‍♀️

(ALSO HELLO I DID NOT FORGET OR IGNORE THIS I WAS TRYING TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO ANSWER CONCISELY AND GOT BUSY AHAKDLGK)

ACTUALLY *YOU* ARE THE SWEETEST AGALLFJA

I think you explained yourself pretty well! Legit, I always love reading your thoughts on Steek and seeing the ideas you have for them, whether it be your mood boards or playlists, I enjoy your ideas! You are THE Steek shipper to me so I really value your perspective on them and keep some of your posts in mind whenever I try to portray them!

Tsums are definitely a long standing obsession of mine lol Evie says thanks for the praise as well! Her AU means a lot for the three of us ✨

(Long post so favs and ships under the cut haha)

To answer your questions, I’d say Tweek is my favorite from the show, but Stan had definitely settled into also being a major fav of mine! When I was first watching it, I went into season six a bit bitter about Tweek taking Kenny’s spot but… he’s just a little dude :3 Simpsons Already Did It is one of my top favorite episodes lol Stan was a surprising favorite but I guess following him and his friends around the most, I really liked the way he was characterized and the struggles he deals with? I also love Kenny content 🥺🧡 Anything and everything for Kenny lol

Anyways, here are some of my top favorite ships!! As you can probably tell, my sisters and I have a lot of overlap in the ships we like, and tend to influence each other a lot lol I’m a multi-shipper who generally likes a ton of ships and also really enjoy crackships and rare pairs cuz of the untapped potential of interactions that could happen! I also enjoy polys but for simplicity I’ll put just pairings here! I had tried organizing them in a tier list but… it ended up as a ranking list anyways so…

Stenny - I actually surprised Kim a lot when I first brought up that I liked her old flame lol My first and my fav ship, there’s something about them that makes me extremely happy and I can’t quite explain it. It probably has to do with their personalities and interactions, but I can’t really articulate it into words haha I also love all the fan created content of them! They’re lovely and adorable 💖

K2 - The OTP of my sisters means a lot of amazing fics recommended to me that makes it hard to not love lol I’m not picky about how the dynamic is portrayed, I’m always down for these two together! They baby 🥹

Steek - <333 SO much love for these two! Like I had said you were definitely a big reason for it. Plus why NOT ship your favorite characters together? They both have a tendency towards destructive patterns that I think the other could relate to, especially with seeking validation on their feelings? I think potential interactions between these two are severely under explored so I’m always searching for more Steek content!

Revin - OKAY. This one was definitely a ship I shipped from the show before looking at the fan content lol Constantly seeing them together in the background just reminded me of playground crushes, and their moments were small but cute. AND THEN WHEN THEY BROKE UP I WAS DEVASTATED. CONFIRMATION THEY WERE DATING AT THE COST OF THEIR BREAK UP AND NEVER SEEING THEM TOGETHER AGAIN 😭 We’ve also headcanoned their personalities quite a bit and so I like to think of them both being a bit airheaded? Kevin constantly thinking about his sci-fi and Red seemingly not pay attention to things around her? Kevin calling their fruits sandwiches and Red just going along with it was also funny even if it’s just an animation error lol ALSO KEVIN BEING SO SAD AT THE BAY OF MEMORIAL PIGS DANCE AS RED DANCED WITH TOLKIEN I CAN’T 😭 I love little background details the most when it comes to characters, I think.

Crenny - Again, Kim was a big influence in me liking Kenny ships, also Crenny has some of the most beautiful and heartfelt works I’ve ever seen and read? I think things would be pretty easy with these two and they’ve had some good moments together!

Cryle - I know people say they don’t interact much but when has that ever stopped me lol They’re both stubborn in different ways, Craig more passive and Kyle more confrontational, I think? Like, I really liked the scene in Fishsticks where they’re both advising Jimmy. They were basically indirectly arguing against each other and I think that’s such an interesting and fun dynamic lololol There’s enough there for me to enjoy them together!

-

Creek - Just LOOK at them lol. I do admit I like them a lot in the show but don’t seek them out in fanworks but they’re great <3

Stendy - I HAVE A LOT TO TALK ABOUT THEM TOO. Like Stendy is complicated but they’re also elementary school kids, of course they’re not gonna know how to relationship properly. But they’re still so messy?? And it’s just on their personalities mannn. I think Stan very much takes his friends for granted sometimes and especially his girlfriend. And Wendy isn’t a part of his friend group enough to really be comfortable discussing their faults? Like obviously he’s done some things and she has as well but things are always resolved offscreen or brushed aside so we never really see how they get over it. Basically they’re cute when he’s pining or when they’re domestically together and supportive but when they’re just not paying attention to each other they’re difficult lol

Stolkien - Another ship from the show, I think their interactions are always so fun, especially in the later seasons 🥺💕

Staig - I love rivals lol I think fandom plays up their hatred for each other a lot but Scauses really convinced me that they do notice each other lol That and Craig likes stirring the pot a lot XD

.

.

.

It feels like I’m missing so many characters and ships but I had to limit myself! Ten is enough haha (shout out to all the ships I do ship but didn’t make it to this list 😔) I tried to keep this short lol

I hope your days have been great as well!! Thank you so much for the ask!! 💖

[whileyoursleeping]

I don’t know if you’d feel comfortable talking about this in an ask (feel free to ignore this if you’re not!) but I was curious, what made you start to feel uninterested in 911? Some of the writing (and admittedly what I’m speculating for 6B) has me frustrated to the point where I’m losing interest and losing a desire to engage in the fandom, which makes me super sad bc I used to get such joy out of watching and engaging! I’m not even disappointed with the “pace” of Buddie getting together (or not even getting together) that’s frustrating to me, which feels like is most other people’s frustration, so I was just curious if there was something about the writing that made you feel disinterested?

heyooo! nonny asking the serious questions over here!

more than happy to answer actually :) i hope you don't mind a very long one lol

i made the mistake of joining twitter initially. honestly, a good 60 percent of the reason i started disliking the show and writing fic was because of the fans. and i know the loud obnoxious ones only make up a small portion of the fanbase but fuck ME are they loud. a few people tried to doxx me, i got mocked for the kitty buck fic and outright called an abuse apologist in my comments section (i've BEEN IN an abusive relationship, so... no) by a person who went on to plagiarise an entire fic from someone else, lie about having permission, and then disappear (yes i'm still mad about it no i will not let it go)

the other half is the writing (don't @ me for my math pls). i haven't watched a lot of season 5 or any of season 6 so far. i was done when athena slapped her kid. i'm one of those people that's in the "i don't think buddie will become canon because the writers are cowards but it's nice to write about" camp. some of it was done very well (eddie's PTSD) and some awfully (buck and whoever that lucy chick is? idk).

i was also diagnosed with CPTSD as a direct result of my own career in emergency services, and there were a lot of parts in the show that were very triggering for me and made it hard to watch. combine that with shitty, entitled fans and writing issues, it just hasn't been worth me trying to rewatch. i'm not sure i'll ever return to it the way i had been invested to begin with. i do want to finish tethers, because i know as a fic reader how frustrating it is to see things left unfinished, but uninspired doesn't even begin to cover how i feel about it right now.

sorry for the wall of text, and thank you very much for reaching out to ask! <3

[evilpenguinrika]

this is why i no longer actively involve myself in large-scale fandom spaces--because people clearly cannot understand the simple notion of "this ship is a NOTP of mine, so I'll just simply ignore and blacklist this ship so I don't have to see it". Like it doesn't take that long to blacklist or ignore??? Everyone is going to ship something because in their eyes, they see something between a character. I never really understood the need to actively start shipping war drama either? Like please, just leave it be, why waste your time when you could be doing something else that's cool like binge-watching a show, playing a video game, or staring out into the empty void of the ether as you have a mild existential crisis?

I personally did not mind Handon, I just didn't like the way the writers of the show took their story and sort of dropped the ball on the development if that makes sense? And, maybe a widely unpopular opinion, but I also didn't mind Jandon? I thought they were very cute despite the angst of how they actually got together. Another probably incredibly widely unpopular opinion, but I was also sort of rooting for a Handosie/Hosandon throuple to be honest because that would have been such an interesting dynamic to explore, especially in a mainstream media (i am a multishipper at heart so don't mind my peculiar ship tastes lol--also i wish the writers explored the Mizzethan throuple outside of the therapy box like pls we were robbed of a Mizzethan throuple 😭).

And i think that's what so many people don't seem to realize, like, again: you can have a ship you don't like and not harass the people who likes the ship that you don't. like it's not that hard people. I have ships in the fandom that I don't like or particularly care for but I can also understand why others ship them as well because they must have saw something in their dynamic to make them ship them. It's honestly all about subjectivity, imho.

To the anon: i'm so sorry that the legacies fandom space makes it really hard and terrifying to post hosie stuff because of stupid ship wars and people who thinks it's fun to harass others for their ships. you should totally be allowed to post your hosie gifs stuff cuz that's super cool and i know gif making/gif makers take so much time and care to make them like y'all are so cool and I would personally love to see them but honestly that's up to you if you're comfortable because again, the anti's in the legacies fandom space can be silly butt heads.

phew. okay. rant over.

also omg i'm so sorry Uncle Asad for hijacking your post rip 😓

hey, out of curiosity, do you feel welcome in the legacies comminity on tumblr? i’ve noticed because of ship wars that hosies seem to be shunned a bit. i guess more so when it comes to the gif making community

Hello, Anonymous Hosie Friend! 😀

I probably have the most uninformative perspective on that question, because I am nearly every bit as much an introvert here on tumblr as I am in the physical world 😂

I follow mostly the dwindling number of now-less-active fellow Hosie authors and don’t make an effort to interact with the larger Legacies/TVDU fandom outside of what those authors pull into my dashboard. (I even fell out of habit of checking the Hosie tag once Kaylee’s last episode aired; I don’t think I’ve checked it since this past Hosietober 😳) And I almost never tag my own posts Legacies unless it is broadly applicable, so I’m not pulled into the loop that way, either. (Probably not good for my reach, but my goal wasn’t to be widely known, so…)

Based on my run-ins with The Handon Troll™ on AO3, it doesn’t surprise me that the larger Legacies community here on tumblr isn’t entirely welcoming to Hosies—though it does sadden me 😢 Fandom is love, and we should live and let live, but that seems quite difficult for some folks 😢

Thanks for the Ask (my Asks are always open, y’all), and I hope in time you’ll be able to find a space here that’s as welcoming as it should be 🤞

[thecontumacious]

Hi again! I enjoyed the Vox headcanons! This time can I request luxiem just simping for their s/o when they do their streams because it’s always been us simping, now it’s their turn! Sorry I keep requesting because I can’t resist your writing.

Luxiem simping/crushing over you

a/n: good to see you again, luna! and pls don't apologize for requesting! i'm always happy to deliver and it's frankly therapeutic for me too hehe~ please do drop in my inbox if you ever come up with any new scenarios for any of the boys ^-^

i also wanna inform you that i struggled with some of them, so i the word "simp" might be synonymous to "crush" in some parts. hope you enjoy <3

warnings: unseiso moments in vox's and ooc shu (IM SORRY TT)

Vox Akuma 👹🌹

this man

is a self-aware simp

is he embarrassed about it? no

is he reserved about it? nope

will he ever shut up about it?

you know the answer

all of his thirst, affection and aka supas only belong to you

there’s no talking him out of it┐(´～｀)┌

the way he shows just how much of a simp he is going to be from not missing a single of any of your streams

okay he’s going to reconsider watching them all if the time zone is too different but you get the point

he’s going to send so many chats in there and maybe throw in some akasupas too just so he could have his name mentioned and have you read out the message he has

bruv aren’t you a mod???

bet vox is going to chat so many innuendos and pick up lines

i think he even challenges himself to send pick up lines that can make you flustered or mess up your game

“oh fuck me!”

Vox Akuma [NIJISANJI EN] 🔧 oh i will gladly fuck you

“i will gladly fu—JESUS VOX—OH SHIT NO”

Vox Akuma [NIJISANJI EN] 🔧 awe sorry darling~

he is a menace in the chats lol

“vox i’ll consider the option of unmodding you”

Vox Akuma [NIJISANJI EN] 🔧 i dare you, dearest

if you don’t manage to do it, vox is most likely going to bug you about it until he’s very satisfied.

he’s going to say that you’re just not up for the challenge and that you’re pretty much “wrapped around his finger” to do that

but if you actually do unmod him, well-

he’s going to bug you all the same HAHSHSHSH

only this time, he’ll think you’re playing hard to get with him

vox in his own stream:

“did you know chat? y/n unmodded me on their last stream. can you believe that? god, that makes me so fucking hard”

here we go with the yabai content☜(`o´)

have you seen him trying to propose to ike??? that times infinity

good luck dealing with him, y/n

if vox gets this bad in your chats, imagine what it’ll be like when you collab with him

“hey vox! do you have time for a collab anytime soon?”

*cue vox weighing his life choices whether to drop his fnaf stream for the next week*

vox: oh fuck it

“yeah, i have some slots open for next week! what are we doing?”

he’s got a long list of pickup lines for you, hoo boy. pls keep your body and soul in mind for the shit this demon can come up with

“hellooo, chat! hi, welcome~” you greet, smiling. “ah yes, i know, we do have a special guest today. would you like to say hi special guest?”

“if it’s for you, i’d do anything, y/n my dear,” vox chuckles and you see the chat exploding

“here come the clippers,” you giggle. “vox you’re making a scene on my channel this isn’t good.”

“isn’t good? you wound me! i thought you adored my presence,” he replies, frowning

“said no one ever.”

“y/n, my loveeeeee, why would you say that:(((((“

“guys please just ignore him whenever he says anything like that, thank you!”

when the vice versa happens, depending on what picture you allow him to use on his streams, vox will put your overlay on his shoulder or at the top of his head

if he’s feeling cheeky, he’s gonna place you super close next to him or literally in front of him just so he can say:

“hey, y/n, how’s my lap?”

v(・∀・*)

i think he’ll generally just act like you and him are already in a relationship most of the time, to feed his simping needs

whenever you dodge his lines, it makes him wonder about how you really feel about him and it in fact, motivates him to try harder

but whenever you get the impact of his lines, whether he’s on stream with you or just in the chats to hang out, vox is proud of himself and is confident you’re weak for him

all in all he can’t get his head straight about how you feel about him and he loves it so fucking much

the chase, the back and forth game, the uncertainty

vox lives for it all

Mysta Rias 🦊🔶

he won’t admit he’s a simp

he’ll continuously tell anything and everything that he’s not simping for you

but yeah, it’s pretty much obvious he is┐(￣ヘ￣)┌

there are so, so many clips of him being a total bottom simp for you

you bring out the barks from within mysta

and when you arrive in his chat-

“oh! y/n’s here????? chat, are they here???? hii!!!!”

Y/N L/N [NIJISANJI EN] 🔧 : mysta you're falling!!!

"OH SHIT FUCK YOURE RIGHT—“

i think this is almost like the opposite of vox

you have most of the power in this lil dynamic you have and in terms of all the other members, mysta has it the worst when it comes to simping

i don’t think he’ll be the most active in your chat but he will make himself present

it’s not because he doesn’t want to show his support or anything, it’s because he’s shy!

but again, it’s still pretty obvious he’s head over heels for you

you’ll tease him a lot in his chats and he’ll never get whatever game he’s doing done

“bark for me, mysta”

“WOOF WOOF WOOF” all day long 🐶

“OH SHIT HOLD ON IM LOSING AHHHH”

mysta continues to check his chat to make sure he didn’t miss any of your messages so that’s another factor to why he keeps getting distracted

in collabs, it’s usually more chaotic than that

but with you, compared to playing with vox or any other members of nijisanji, mysta is more… composed?

mysta rias

composed?????

ikr

he also tends to give in more effort when you’re gaming together

obviously to impress you 🙄

there was one time mysta lost pretty miserably while you were around and although he was upset he didn’t get to impress you, he didn’t mind your amused reactions and offering sympathy for him!

“awee sorry mysta! but hey, you did really good in that round tho! you came pretty close!”

“ahhhh but still—that loss sucked a lot”

“don’t worry about it, mysta! it’s just a game ehe”

“said the person who won the round without breaking a sweat?????”

you laugh at his response, and mysta in actuality was glad he could make you laugh anyway

it’s his consolation prize :3

but when he does win

he’s pretty chaotic. the real mysta comes out here.

“FUCK YEAH BABY”

“congratz mysta! that was so cool!!!”

“o-oh thank you—“

okay maybe just a part of the real chaotic mysta comes out. he’s shy bcs of your praises

also, i forgot to mention that mysta reduces his unseiso tendencies and his cursing when you’re around

the chat and the members all notice this

vox: “wow you’re surprisingly very civilized today, mysta”

mysta: “huh—what’s that supposed to mean?? i’m always civilized!!”

ike: “he’s right tho. he hasn’t said anything unseiso today”

shu: “maybe he’s finally living his seiso dream”

luca: “yeah that’s super pog of you mysta”

mysta: “shut up guys, i’ve always been seiso!!”(⩺_⩹)

when you’re collabing with him, you don’t notice this, but when you’re talking and he’s not, he’s busy looking at your model moving around because he thinks it’s so pretty

he also likes to wonder what you actually look like under the model

mysta will sometimes retweet fanarts of you

“guys look it’s mommy/daddy” *mysta on a good day*

when you’re not around at all though, mysta is going to gush about you. whether it’s about a fanart he recently saw, or clips of your best moments on stream

yes i know i said mysta is actually really shy, but if any of his simping moments ever get clipped and you happen to watch them, yes he’ll get embarrassed but he doesn’t have to face you directly that way

in a way, mysta wants to hint at you just how much he admires you

in real life, mysta continues to wonder if you mean any of the things you said to him all this time

do you really think of him as cute from that one time you told him that? were your praises of his gaming genuine? do you actually put up with his shit???

it literally keeps him up at night and he’s waiting for the day he gets to know the truth behind it all

for now though, simping is his shield

other boys utc!

Luca Kaneshiro 🦮🔆

i cant say he has the real traits of a simp????

you can’t exactly tell probably because he’s just a natural himbo

okay i wouldn’t say simp, luca just idolizes you so, so much

whenever you see him and he’s looking at you or talking about you, you can see the stars twinkling in his eyes and you just wanna die from HOW FUCKING CUTE HE IS AHHHHH（ｉДｉ）

luca tends to hang out with you outside stream a lot since he thinks it’s way more genuine than doing things online like through streams or things

because of this, he’s stocked up on so many stories involving you with his chat

when he’s gaming and there’s something that reminds him of you, luca is quick to tell a story to chat

“chat chat i just remembered! the other day i was talking to y/n right?”

he giggles so much when he’s talking about you >:((((

luca loves collabing with people so he’ll constantly make sure he’s collabing with you enough, whether you on his channel or vice versa

he enjoys your company and although talking about you is usually enough, luca just can’t help himself!!

i can definitely see luca in a big collab with you and if he’s placed right next you, he’s more than likely going to lean his head towards you in hopes you’ll learn your head back

oh come on you definitely will won’t you??? how could you resist

if it’s not his or your turn to speak in a big collab, he’s going to message you through discord to rendezvous

“fugma”

“wtf luca”

don’t worry u still love him <3

SPEAKING OF DEEZ NUTS JOKES

luca is both rly enthusiastic and reluctant to give you any deez nuts jokes he finds

one half of him is rly urging him to tell you, see if you’d fall for it

but the other half doesn’t want to because he doesn’t wanna do that to you!!

pls luca don’t, spare us

depending on the time zones, luca will definitely show up in your chats!

he’s not crazy like vox to send you supas but if he came up with a rly good message to send you (could be a joke or just a congratulatory message for reaching a milestone), he’ll def send you an aka supa or a rainbow even

“oh luca‘s here! hey luca!!”

“hi y/n!!! sorry for being late :(“

“hey don’t worry about it!! you’re always welcome in my streams luca!”

all the pogging in the chats, sigh

“POG Y/N!”

when doing a horror game stream (inspired by his little nightmares streams), he will absolutely ramble to you about how scary everything is

“oh god y/n this is too creepy!!!”

“it’s okay luca we can do this!”

you help him however you can when he’s stuck on a level and he appreciates you not backseating <3

and when he has to face the mannequins (little nightmares 2), you’re there 100% to support him

the reason he invited you to his horror streams in the first place tbh

luca likes it sooo much when he’s being cared for by you, especially when he’s scared or creeped out by something

i think the most evidence you can find of him being a simp is when he goes easy on you in games

you’re offended, i’m offended, we all are

let’s say for example he’s playing friday the 13th with other people, HE’S FOR SURE GOING TO LET YOU OFF THE HOOK (literally?)

either he’ll do it conspicuously by taunting you out loud or warning you he’s super close by

or he’ll do it subtly by purposely ignoring you or turning a blind eye when you’re right there

in real life, luca just really adores you as a person and not just as the streamer you

he enjoys your company and all he wants is to make you laugh and smile all the time, sharing his happiness whenever he can and inviting you to his streams to have fun!

luca doesn’t realize this and someone really needs to tell him that he’s… feeling things for you and if he doesn’t sort it out with himself and you, there might be unwanted consequences

i say this because luca does seem like the type to mistake romantic love for platonic love so it might be either you or other members that has to tell him

sonny: someone has been violating the simping limit. please, simp responsibly.＼(｀0´)／

Ike Eveland 🖋💙

unlike vox and mysta’s uncontrolled manners, ike keeps his simping tendencies to a minimum to the point that no one really catches on immediately

you’d have to keep a really good eye on him

clippers do your job!!! expose him!!!

but anyway, ike might not seem like he’d hardcore simp but he does indeed worship you although lowkey :3

the way he does this is most likely going to be collabing with you a lot and mentioning you in his solo streams, similar to that of luca’s

ike’s a pretty busy guy, so he unfortunately cannot bond with you outside of vtuber work much (;﹏;)

thus why he really savors every second passing by whenever you and him collab

you could see the difference of aura radiating off this man whenever he’s on stream with you and when he’s with someone else

for example, when you try to flirt with him, ike doesn’t actually dodge it????? either he responds to it or gets really really embarrassed

he’s an absolute gentleman so he always tries to talk about you more than himself!

you got a story? he’s all ears and has a notepad ready to jot down any accumulating questions

the one obvious evidence he’s simping for you is when he really lets himself loose around you, letting his geekier side run free

another difference of how he treats you compared to anyone else is probably the teasing

ike is going to tease you a lot during streams cheeky bastard

he’s also going to challenge you to say things in swedish and or japanese

even better if you don’t understand either languages ;-;

if you speak a language he doesn’t know, pls do bully him back. he might not like it, but he’s too smitten hearing you speak in a different language

ike eveland caught simping in 4k 📸

another sign is when he chats a whole lot during your streams

as aforementioned, ike is a busy guy and he can’t interact with you outside of work unfortunately

him making time to send you chats during your streams is a big win right there bestie

he’ll say the sweetest things on there and maybe throw in an aka supa or two

Ike Eveland [NIJISANJI EN] 🔧: hey y/n! i’m glad you’re having fun! 💙

“o-oh hi ike!! thanks for coming!”

Ike Eveland [NIJISANJI EN] 🔧: no problem, y/n! i’m always glad to be here

even vox is jealous

speaking of chats, ike is also def going to respond to all of your tweets. repost, retweet, reply and all that good stuff

ike enjoys your streams too!

okay this particular simp symptom is something no one and absolutely not a single soul on this earth (not even you or the members) know

but he’ll absolutely listen to your streams when he works

yes he’s busy, can’t touch the keyboard currently

but listening to you game or have fun while he works? killing two birds with one stone if you ask ike eveland

did i also tell u that he excuses himself before leaving your stream and only leaves when you get the message?

Ike Eveland [NIJISANJI EN] 🔧: “hey y/n sorry i have to go now:((“

he won’t leave until you read it.

“oh okay! thanks again for stopping by ike!! mwah!”

ike: Σ(-᷅_-᷄๑)

now he doesn’t wanna leave sigh

ike adores you so much and he’s admittedly rly upset he can’t bond with you as much as he’d like

he’d love to know what you’re into, what your favorite foods are, what games you like the most if you’d ever consider collabing with him next week

so in terms of feelings beyond simping, ike is stumped.

one of the concerning factors is the fact he only interacts with you through streams and barely through real time hangouts on discord and such

ike is worried that he’s only feeling these things through a screen and he’s not getting enough of the real you without the streamer label. sure, you’ve been absolutely nice to him and have made flirtatious comments here and there, but weren’t you only doing that for the fans? only for the internet to see?

perhaps, it’s best he just listens to your streams and appreciate what he has already with you

ike doesn’t want to lose whatever you have with him already

Shu Yamino 🔮✨

here's the culprit that made me pull at my hair

this guy.

okay

seriously, it might be me but he rarely shows really bad simp symptoms

he’s so much of a geek that he basically turns a blind eye to those kinds of things :”

i don’t even think shu is going to “simp” because he doesn’t really simp?? he admires ig

i can conclude that shu’s way of “simping” for you is basically befriending you more than he would with others

with that being said, the person he “simps” for will definitely get very very special treatment

in solo streams, shu is sure to use your model and just make it tiny, put it in a corner or something

*reading chat* "what's y/n doing there? nah, they're good. they're just chilling."

he's gonna mention you a whole lot

say like there's a character that you like or it reminds him of you, he's gonna say your name a lot or imitate you💀

in collabs, shu usually holds himself back or reserves himself when he’s with someone else

sure, he’ll crack a joke here and there, or add a commentary but it’s just not the same with you obviously

he tends to be more comfortable around you!(/ω＼)

it doesn’t look like it but shu is actually always very excited when he collabs with you

“so uh guys,” shu laughs nervously. “you heard that we’re gonna have a guest today. say hi, y/n.”

“hi hello! hi yaminions! hi shu!”

and when you're teasing/flirting with him, he'll most definitely start messing up his words or just get super flustered(•ﾟдﾟ•)

and btw, when another vtuber asks him about you in a collab, he's more than likely going to either be shy about whatever it is or excitedly talk about you depending on the topic

i think shu will purposely have collabs with you for games that need more brain than brawn

he wants to be able to impress you just like mysta, but mysta wants to do it with games that are more hardcore, need practice and strategy

shu on the other hand is most likely going to do it with brain games like that one stream where he played the coding gameᕙ(‾̀◡‾́)ᕗ

no matter if you understood coding or not, shu figuring it out without your help blows your mind away

you praise him so much, but shu just laughs it off

when in reality, he’s pretty embarrassed but also rly glad he was able to impress you with his smarts

shu is relatively active in your chats!

he’ll stop by to say hi, or say he’ll come back again later

or he’ll just straight up announce he’s gonna barge into your stream—

Shu Yamino [NIJISANJI EN] 🔧: yo y/n whaddup

“sup shu. not going to play getting over it with me?”

Shu Yamino [NIJISANJI EN] 🔧: only if u swear to send me 10$ if i can get higher than u by the end of the stream

“oh it’s on yamino. get in here”

surprise collab?????

i think shu would submit to your art tag with a doodle of you ashjahj

the closest thing you can really see shu simping is when he sees your design and just rants about it on his stream

it lives in his head rent free

also, you two hang out on discord a lot

he sends you memes all the time only because he wants to be able to laugh with you

“hey y/n look”

the memes he sends can be corny sometimes but you appreciate him sending it to you nonetheless

because of these random conversations, you guys have your own inside jokes and when in collabs, shu will mention some and you’ll laugh

the chat will go bonkers on what you guys mean by that

4:36 minutes of shu and y/n being aliens

5:08 minutes of shu and y/n being best friends

in the eyes of the chat, you guys look like really fun best friends and that’s why until now, no one has really noticed or even called the things shu does for as simping

from the inside jokes, the times where you barge into his streams or when you ask for his help mid stream

“so like when—oh, hold on guys. y/n just asked for my help for their stream.”

he hides the fact he can flex his tech shupport skills to you

we love a man with a beeg brain

the only people who can notice shu actually “simping” is only within nijisanji

they notice how shu gets all cozy with you and just instantly warms without much obstacles

they notice how you and shu basically made a world of your own with your own languages and jokes no one else can understand

they notice shu being more like himself when he’s around you

is shu himself aware?

hard to tell

mysta has probably called him out once on discord that he’s down bad for you only to have shu brush it off

ike will say to him that he’s been really close to you and he thinks it’s very sweet, then shu will contemplate if that’s what it really is between you and him

a part of him says that what you have is nothing more than platonic

he enjoys your company and how you always laugh together, even if you’re in completely different streams

but then shu realizes just how right everyone was

how he has been treating you differently than anyone else

why do i do that? shu would think.

and he’s admittedly nervous of the answer

did he like you??? was what he had been doing all this time really just because he wanted to be friends??

or was it really simping just like mysta pointed out?

shu doesn’t want to think about it, really. so he tries to shrug it off. but when he sees you… well, there’s really no avoiding it

you guys, i'm gonna kick myself for doing this at 4 fucking am i have school in like 3 hours :D

Masterlist!

[muichu]

just gonna let you know in advance that i’m already in love with your writing so i already have another request if you wanna hear it, but this time it’s angst lol, okay SO how do you feel ab the TR boys (draken (he’s my comfort character okay), baji, sanzu, and kazutora) and their bf flinching during an argument? also please end it w fluff if you can pls :) thank you!! and keep up the good work <3

a/n: omg you're so sweet ily :((( and I love all your asks, this is one of my favourite tropes!! Also this is superrrrrrr long, I hope you don't mind

Tokyo Revengers boys: their boyfriend flinching during an argument

Pairs: draken x m!reader, baji x m!reader, sanzu x m!reader, kazutora x m!reader

Warnings: slightly aggressive behaviour (mostly yelling)

Genre: angst to fluff

Draken

- draken is usually a really patient person and arguments get resolved through mature conversations

- because of this, any disagreements are solved with no hard feelings, but not today apparently

- seeing you flinch absolutely broke his heart because he's supposed to be protecting you!!!

- definitely talks about it with you afterwards cuz he feels so guilty :(((

"It's like I don't even matter to you anymore. It's always 'mikey' 'mikey' 'mikey', you're out in danger because of him and you always come home super late and you completely ignore me, I'm literally your boyfriend" you ramble on frustratingly. Draken groans, already having had a rough and tiring day. His headache kept getting worse and worse as you were going on about god knows what.

"Y/n, just drop it for fucks sake, I'm tired" he sighs. You scoff at his reply. "So you have all the time in the world for mikey and toman but not for me? Do I even matter to you anymore?" you begin raising your voice, causing his headache to get worse.

He abruptly gets up and raises his voice as well. "I said drop it already" he says with anger in his voice. Immediately, he notices that it comes out more aggressive than he intended but in that flash second, he saw you flinch. Right then and there he felt his heart shatter into pieces.

"Y/n, baby, fuck" he quickly walks up to you, bringing you into a hug as you felt tears welling in your eyes. "I'm so sorry, I'm so so so sorry, fuck I shouldn'tve lashed out on you like that, im so sorry" he whispers as he holds onto you softly, as if you're made of glass.

"No I'm sorry, I shouldn'tve brought this up in the first place" you reply with a sniffle. "Don't apologise, you're my boyfriend and your concerns matter to me" he replies back. "Let's just go to sleep, we'll talk about it in the morning" you mumble out. With a nod, he picks you up and takes you to your shared room, laying down beside you as you both drift off into sleep.

Baji

- baji has quite the temper, I mean, he literally sets cars on fire when he's hungry

- but he never, EVER, lets himself direct that anger towards you, he loves and cherishes you too much to do that

- he's so protective of you and he does everything he can to make you feel safe, so seeing you flinch destroyed him

- he would never forgive himself :(( he'd feel too guilty, even after you assure him that you're fine

"Baji, I told you to be more safe when you're with toman. Seeing you all bruised up like this breaks my heart, you know that" you sigh as you tend to his wounds.

"I know that, but I had no other choice!! My friends were in danger, what more could I've done???" Baji replies, feeling emotional over the fight he got into. You're a bit taken aback at how he responds. "Okay, okay, calm down. There's no need to be like that, just make sure to be more sa-"

"They're my friends, I couldn't just abandon them like that!!!!" he yells back, feeling frustrated that you're egging him on about this. Now that you were definitely not expecting. His sudden tone caused you to flinch, but you quickly tried to cover it up.

You weren't as slick as you thought you were, because Baji definitely noticed. "Y/n..? Fuck, wait, no please, I didn't mean to startle you like that, please" he says, pulling you into a hug. Tears well up in his eyes, feeling even more heartbroken that his sudden burst caused that reaction out of you.

"I'm so so so sorry, fuck y/n I did mean to startle you like that. I'm so sorry" he says as he hides his face in the crook of your neck. "I understand if you don't wanna forgive me, I'm so sorry" he says as he keeps holding onto you.

"It's fine Baji, really" you whisper as you keep brushing his hair. "I know how important your friends are to you, I'm sorry if I came on too strong about it" you pull away and give him a kiss, wiping away his stray tears.

Sanzu

- sanzu is a really protective and loyal person, he will protect you to the end of earth

- getting into arguments with you is one of his least favourite things ever and he always tries to avoid them

- seeing you flinch would break his heart so bad, it'd genuinely ruin him cuz he feels like he failed at being a good boyfriend, which he always tries to be for you

- like baji, he wouldn't be able to forgive himself :(((

"Sanzu, where've you been all day? Why weren't you answering my calls? I was so worried about you" you call out to him as you see him walk through the door, the smell of drugs clouding his aura. You sighed, bringing him to sit down as you get him water.

"I told you to lay off of the drugs, they aren't good for you, please" you plead, concern laced in your voice. "I only want what's best for you, I love you" you add on. You hear him release a frustrated groan.

"Don't worry about me, I'm not dead yet" he says sarcastically, making you frown slightly. "I know you aren't, but at this rate you will be soon" you reply, which causes him to scoff.

"We aren't getting anywhere like this, let me set up a bath for you and we can go to sleep" you say, knowing that he isn't in the right state of mind. "Y/n let go of me, I'm fine" he responds bluntly.

"You aren't fine, you're intoxicated. Just take a bath please" you say, growing frustrated. "I'm not intoxicated, I'm fucking fine" he exclaims, pushing your hand off of him and causing you to flinch.

The second that he registers what happened, his mind seemed to clear automatically. "Oh my god y/n I'm so sorry" he says, grabbing your hand back and cupping in in his own.

"It's fine..." you say quietly "just go take a bath and we can go to sleep.." you say as you begin to walk off. Before you can make it anywhere, he hugs you from behind. "Y/n, really, I'm so fucking sorry. Please join me in my bath, please" he mumbles against your ear, the guilt still being prominent. You nod shyly, as he drags you to the bathroom.

Kazutora

- kazutora is so patient and loving with you and like sanzu, he absolutely hates arguing with you

- he loves you so so so much, the thought of you flinching because of him tears him to shreds

- arguing with you reminds him of his parents which deeply traumatised him and he didn't want you two to end up like that :((

- the guilt he feels is so heavy, it eats him up inside because he thinks you don't trust him anymore or that you think he'd harm you

"Kazutora, you really need to prioritise your mental health more. Why haven't you been going to your therapy sessions?" you ask him softly, rubbing his back. "I don't need therapy, it doesn't help" he says quietly.

"Of course it does, change takes time Kazutora, and I'll be here with you every step of the way!" you exclaim, trying to lighten the mood.

"You wouldn't understand y/n, it's fucking frustrating" he says, his voice quivering. You could tell he was starting to get on edge, which was worrying you. "I'm just concerned for you, I love you so much, seeing you in pain like this pains me more than you think" you reply.

"What would you know?? You haven't experienced half the shit I have, nothing helps, it won't get better!!" he says with a raised voice, causing you to flinch. As soon as he saw your reaction, he froze right away. Once it fully registers, he can feel every single part of his heart break into pieces.

"Y/n, I'm so sorry, fuck y/n i didn't mean to, please, I'm so sorry. Please don't leave me, I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry!!!!" He says as he grips onto your shirt, tears pouring out of his eyes.

Seeing his reaction caused your heart to break along with his. You grabbed his hands and brought him into a hug, your own tears mixing with his.

"I'll never leave you, I'm okay, I love you so much. I only want what's best for you, I can't handle seeing you in pain like this" you cry softly with him. You hold onto him, rocking with him side to side as you both end up snoozing in each others arms.

a/n: wow that was really smth! I'm sorry for not having this up earlier, I have a fever and I'm so tired but I hope you enjoyed reading!!

navigation

[bowandcurtsey]

Hello! I just saw your blog so can I pls request BC boys (fuego, William, yami) having a s/o that is afraid of heights and flying bcuz the reader never flies on young age until older( if you don't mind I want to do a part 2 of this with different characters hope you don't mind. Of and feel free to ignore this! 😁👍) Thank you!💜

Hello Neon!! I've done a similar request for Yami, Jack and Nozel and it's right Here !

I'll do Fuego and William today :) Of course you may send in a part 2 when the requests are open! Thank you for waiting this long for your request sweetie, I'm so sorry but most importantly I hope you get to read your request <3

Characters: Fuegoleon | William x f! reader tw: heights, phobia, unchecked

Fuegoleon Vermillion

Fue always thought you had a good heart and strong magic and always persuaded you to become a magic knight. But he always wondered why you always rejected him.

And whenever you went on dates, you'll never let him pick you up. He was starting to get suspicious of you always wanting him to walk you home instead of using salamander.

He decided to surprise you one day to appear at your house to pick you up for your date. But you didn't seem happy to see him at all. Instead you were afraid.

Fue summoned Salamander away, "I'm sorry, are you actually afraid of Salamander? Because you've been refusing to let me pick or send you on him. Shall we just use a traditional way instead?"

He began to pick up the broom and you immediately stopped him. Well, you had to come clean of course, although you were dating an absolute gentleman and he seldom got mad at you, being open in a relationship was important to you as well.

Fue let out a sigh after you explained about your fear of heights and flying. "I thought you didn't like something about me, y/n! you scared me!"

He helped you get used to it, letting you sit on salamander's back together with him. He held you tightly while you both flew around at a low height.

Gradually, he flew higher and higher and he always chatted with you so you didn't notice. And you were amused by how fast you always reached your destination instead of spending hours walking.

"Well sweetheart, now my legs don't have to break after hours of walking, you must have really strong legs!" your crimson lion captain joked.

William Vangeance

You always avoided flying and would always say that you didn't like to go far from home. So you both always had dates in the capital.

One day you both were at the borders of the Noble realm, there were some thieves that were running away. William grabbed you along and gave chase to them while flying.

You were stunned and horrified and clung onto William super tightly while you closed your eyes. Initially William thought that you were just shocked by the ordeal but after he settled down with everything, the smart captain put 2 and 2 together and guessed it.

He asked you and you simply nodded your head, still overwhelmed by the series of events that just unfolded. He apologised like a true gentleman he is- on one knee while he pressed a kiss to the back of your hand.

It took him sometime before he suggested to help you overcome your fears and helped you with flying. You both spent a lot of time on his world tree, slowly climbing up the branches as you progressed. On the first day you could only managed to be at the lowest branch, but a few weeks later, you were slightly a few branches higher.

He would sit with you and talk about anything under the sun, even have a picnic or chilling with the birds and butterflies. You got inspired by the little animal that were able to fly high and freely, and William always promised you that the view would get lovelier the higher up the world tree you climbed, so you were always curious of the view on top.

Eventually, you got motivated and slowly, William helped you to learn how to fly.

On the day you got to the top of his world tree, the tears flowed down your eyes naturally. You were just amazed by the view you've never even imagined in your wildest dreams to be. You were still a little fearful, but William held you tightly while you just took in everything your eyes could see.

You were both proud of yourself about how far you've come, from walking, to ascending William's tree and now at the top. You both promised each other to go on more adventures together and help each other overcome your fears and insecurities together. And that made the both of you so strong as a couple.

Fuego and Will are the ultimate gentleman to their other half, you cannot change my mind on that.