#this generation can not catch a break istg | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

here4theheartbreak · 1 year

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Cruella Hongjoong is God Tier Hongjoong. All hail Hongruella~!! The little ponytail was amazing. Probably the most iconic of all the HJ styles!

Waterbomb was A LOT to process. I am also not their strongest soldier! I was not only wounded by all the footage and photos, I was nearly fatally wounded. Choi San? Deadly. 💀😂

Oh my godddd! Those Woosan photocards?? They are SO cute. Ahhhhhhhh. I can't handle it. The ears? Wow. I totally get it, I would also want to take them everywhere.

This is probably because I had no internet for 10 days straight, but I had a dream about Mingi last week? I'm a vivid, lucid dreamer anyway.... but I touched his arms and istg it was the realest thing I've ever felt in a dream?? And then, when I woke up, I was thinking about it and I think it's kinda rare that I actually touch people in my dreams. It's happened, but not that often. And that made me curious about dreaming and dreams in general. What a strange, interesting thing it is, to be able to dream when we sleep. ☁️💤 /dream tangent

Let's see... some Ateez things that have caught my attention over the last fews days....

✨Yunho dressing up as Saiki for Mingi's birthday? ADORABLE. INCREDIBLE. AMAZING. FRIENDSHIP GOALS. I'm loving this whole 'dress up as a character they love' trend that's happening on the members' birthdays. I'm really looking forward to seeing what happens for Jongho. I literally have no idea what character it might be.

✨Mingi released his song?? I'm SO in love with it?? Ahhh, the talent!! It makes me feel SO much. It's sad but beautiful. 10/10. What a king. 👑🐺🐣

✨The clip of Mingi talking to a fan, asking her to show him the back of her 'Mingi' sign, only to discover it says 'Yunho'. The way he says 'ahhhh, it's okay, it's okay' ... it's so soft?? Heart? Melted.

✨San being so offended/upset on that show where they were discussing a husband selling all of his wife's merch without her knowing? I LOVE HIM SO MUCH FOR THAT. And he was right! The husband should get it all back, even if he has to beg. The actual audacity of that man. I would literally divorce him. 😑

✨Oh, and the YT live they did together! Wooyoung talking about the pregnant fan and San's expression in the back?? Hello?? He's too cute. ☺️💗

✨Also, Yunho witnessing SH basically caressing (????) HJ's hand in the same YT live?? Will Yunho EVER catch a break?? It's not looking likely. He must have witnessed so much. I feel like we've barely scratched the surface on the things he's seen.

✨Talking of Yunho... he really looks like Mingi in that T-pain dance insta he did with Wooyoung?? Just his outfit and the way his body moves... it's crazy.

Also on insta... The dinosaur/nyahhhh video of Hwa, Joong, San, and Jongho?? It makes me laugh so much every time I see it. We are blessed by these fools~!😂✨🦖

*hums the Jurassic Park theme tune*

On a slightly negative note. I wish they'd do more YT lives and less short videos on their app? Like come onnnnn. I miss Seonghwa's hour long lives of him just chatting. KQ are becoming monsters of capitalism. Let me have my silly men for free. Don't make me fight you.... 😩

Random but whenever I glance back over the previous ask to see what all I said/you’re responding to I realize that I make such an embarrassing amount of typos that I don’t catch. 🤣

Anyways, yess I love those cat ear pcs; I ended up adding San’s to one of the photo card holders that I keep on my bag.

That sounds like the absolute wildest dream! I almost never dream about idols either, the random one esp from back when I was writing fanfic still, they’d crop up here and there, but not often. That sounds insane. Those sort of super realistic dreams can be wild and so unsettling, so it’s a good thing this one wasn’t lol

✧ Mingi’s song was so pretty - what is this trend of super sappy/sad sounding birthday songs tho??? Please guys, getting older is not the end of the world V_V lmao

✧ I haven’t seen that clip of Mingi with the fan! But that’s so sweet, he is so soft for Yunho. During the zombie game this most recent wanteez they were adorable too.

✧ And that show was hilarious - San and Hongjoong were so delightful with them. I cracked up at the beginning when they brought up the period question and both their faces just O.O — good boys but still boys in the end 😂 (I appreciated the polite “we’re not qualified to speak on that” comment - rather than being grossed out, they knew they’d be entirely out of their element which was cute). San was so into these situations too, it was fun to watch him get so passionate about them.

✧ Yunho has had enough of this queer shit, someone give him a vacation far away from his group 😭 - I mean he’s just as bad but I’m sure he doesn’t see it that way. (Also yeah that TikTok he did with Wooyoung is going to be my new sleep paralysis demon - but yeah no you are 100% not the only one that thought that was Wooyo and Mingi; I watched it twice through before I realized the jaw was wrong for Mingi…. I think he raided his closet for the video though lol

✧ I am 100% sure that they convinced Jongho to do the dinosaur video by promising him an all you can eat meal, or his dorm to himself for a weekend - sleep or food, the ultimate motivators. (Either that or he lost a very massive bet).

✧ Ahh the TokToq situation. Like, okay I get the point of the one on one ability and all that, but they really need to make it more easily accessible. Do like maybe some for members only (and make those ones covered by the membership people pay for) and then do others for everyone, if they want their own app. Also please please for the love of god fix the translation problems. And make them not disappearing. It really needs a lot of work and unfortunately I think considering every other sms app like this is getting absorbed by the Langolier that is HYBE rn it’s just not a smart move to do - esp when YT and IG are already super accessible and everyone likes them. Hell even TikTok lives if they must. It’s just frustrating considering they could do so much more if they weren’t tying themselves to capitalistic gain (KQ, fans will spend money, I promise, put out more merch, more international fanmeets - you don’t need the 5-10 bucks that this app will gain you, I promise you can make more if you just promote your international group internationally.

✧ On a happier note tho I got my membership kit! The last group I bothered buying a membership for was bts and it took BigHit literally 11 to 13 months to bother sending it to me. And considering how small KQ is, I expected the same and wasn’t too worried about it - so when it showed up at my door on Friday I was so delighted. The tarot style cards are so cute. I decided to pull out 22 and sleeve them to use as an actual major arcana readings deck (some conversions ofc - like The Emperor is now The Sea King, Death is now The Wolf, The Devil is now Desire, etc) - I’m waiting on the sleeves to come now. I was so happy to see that they put the little fortune telling answer book in both english and korean, and it’s such a nice cute little size. I don’t want to give too many spoilers if you’ve not gotten yours yet/don’t want spoilers but it’s so nice.

✧Oh! Speaking of tarot I learned they’re making a Good Omens tarot deck, it’s coming out end of November. I preordered it, call it an xmas gift lol - I love Good Omens, it’s by far one of my favorite novels of all time and I adore the show (David Tennant has always been a favorite actor and he’s such a good person, and Michael Sheen is so sweet… Ironically rn my kid is watching Dr Who for the first time with me and we just finished Tennant’s arc, he was so upset when he regenerated - I felt bad but also… a whole mood kid, 10 is my Doctor).

And! On the tarot path, so my friend and I were joking around when I was trying to figure out how to convert Ateez’s deck to a proper tarot deck, and we joked that I have enough idols now that I could make a whole kpop deck and now I can’t get the idea out of my damn mind 🤣

Also I found this photo a few days ago and may have had a stroke and I simply cannot stop staring at it lol

#answered #ask #daegu-flowjob #long post

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soleilnomoon · 2 years

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Hello!!! 🌸

Can I ask you for a piece of advice please? (If no feel free to ignore this 😊)

I have a work ready and all, I think I just need to edit it and it all finished.

The thing is.. it's a 20k word fic aaand I'm really worried that people will find it too long 😭

There are different scenes and funny moments so istg it's not like it's boring for me 💀 lmao

And also 20k it's the version WITHOUT unnecessary moments and scenes sooo 🙃

Any tips? I'm really scared lmao 😭 I really don't want to disappoint my followers 🙃😭😊😩

Thank you for your time~ Have a wonderful day!! 💐

hiii 😊💕 yes of course you can! first, i just want to say that it’s super impressive that you wrote a 20k fic, like i’m just in awe — i’m sure you worked hard on it too, that’s rly cool omg 😭 if it’s a piece you’re proud of, regardless of the length, you should post it. your followers followed you for a reason, so they’ll trust your judgment in terms of pacing and whatnot.

i’m from the generation where fics used to be long like that forreal, so i’m used to long word counts in general. there are a lot of people who still love long fics like that, and there are ppl who prefer shorter works. is your fic is part of a series? if so, that piece should definitely be separated into chapters; that way it’s more digestible for your readers.

if it’s a singular work, i would post the entire fic, but create sections so that people can come back if they take a break (you can use dividers too!) i find that when longer works are sectioned off it’s a little easier on the eyes when you’re scrolling, especially if it’s something really interesting/entertaining. plus it doesn’t feel like you’re reading so much if it’s in parts.

i would also consider (if you haven’t already) reaching out to someone you trust to beta read for you. we tend to be too close to our work, so having a fresh pair of eyes can help you trim things that aren’t necessary — and tbh even if your beta reader gives you advice you don’t have to take it, it’s your fic you should do what feels right. another good way to measure if the piece is too long is to read your work out loud to yourself — hearing the words vs reading/writing them are two different things; trust me when i say it will help tighten your writing and buff out any parts that don’t necessarily need to be there. it also helps you catch sentences that don’t flow well.

i think your followers will be delighted to read a long piece of work yours; don’t let the word count scare you, go with your gut. if 20k feels right then post it; you should post it in whatever manner works best for you 💛😌

#asks.#sry i was rambling and cut myself off bc i would've been here for days #i think u should post it; longer fics should make a comeback

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benedick-cumberbussy · 3 years

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HEADCANONS: GANYU, XIAO AND ZHONGLI

sfw dating headcanons for my 3 favourite immortals🥺❤

WARNING ;; mentions of insecurities, mental break downs, anxiety, liyue archon quest spoilers and a few poorly placed penis jokes.

NOTE ;; i love these 3 too much to not make sfw dating headcanons for them. I also had a lot of fun writing for Zhongli

SUMMARY ;; sfw dating headcanons for ganyu, xiao and zhongli (seperate) and their (gender neutral) s/o

WORD COUNT ;; 1.3k

GANYU

Being the general secretary of the Liyue Qixing is a big burden, so even when once you guys are dating or in a relationship, GANYU is (sadly) often busy.

Absolute queen please tell her that she's doing great

On the occasion that GANYU is free, you guys spend it together as much as possible

If this is during the early stages of your relationship, you or GANYU won't initiate too much pda.

But later on, maybe a few months or years in, GANYU will be more comfortable with holding hands, hugging, kissing, etc. in public

Speaking of which, GANYU is very cuddly

She likes when you lay down on her lap, so she can play with your hair while you take a nap

ALSO NAPS WITH GANYU ARE SO AAAAAA

Whenever GANYU is free, she likes to take naps on grassy areas with shade from the sun

It's also a good segment for picnics because when you guys wake up, you're almosty always hungry

Sometimes GANYU refuses to eat with you because she thinks she's overweight and that you'll think she's ugly :((

Please tell her she's beautiful and that you don't care about what she weighs

We love body positivity<3<3<3

Dates with GANYU are always pleasant

Being of high status in the Liyue Qixing of course has it's benefits such as access to high-end restaurants that the average liyue citizen (you) wouldn't be able to afford

I'm not apologizing

GANYU strictly will NOT bring you flowers when she visits you because she thinks that she won't be able to control herself if she were around any💔

She thinks you probably hate her because you won't experience any of that cute cliche romantic stuff because she isn't human☹

Hug her please (istg all the adepti need therapists)

You start eating a lot more vegetarian meals so that GANYU doesn't get uncomfortable when you guys go out for food or if later in the relationship, make your own food at home

It's also a great bonding activity <3<3

You both like to cook with eachother, even if you can or can't cook- it's the fun that counts, right?

later on in the relationship, GANYU might invite you to bathe in hotsprings with her

I'd sell my soul to bathe with GANYU tbh

(Also yes you knew she was an adeptus from the very start. I mean, it's pretty obvious. Whose gonna believe that her big-ass black and red horns were a haor accessory?)

XIAO

If you told me that XIAO had a significant other, I would've started cackling ngl

I don't see XIAO as the romantic type- quite the opposite, actually.

Any attempts of being romantic goes horribly wrong

Please be nice to him though coz he's trying his best and that's enough :')

Similarly to ganyu, you guys barely meet. Usually only twice or thrice a week (maybe 4 times if you're lucky)

But when you two do get together, it's quite pleasant. Quiet strolls around Dihua Marsh, Little picnic dates at Guili Plains, and if you're lucky- he might bring you to Jueyun Karst for some sight-seeing.

XIAO appears to me as the type of person to stargaze, so I think that's something that you'd do frequently together when he isn't out fighting demons

Sadly, XIAO isn't vey good at expressing his emotions through words, which is why i wholeheartedly believe that his love language is either giving gifts or acts of kindness. What's a better way of expressing your feelings than through action if not words?

Its kind of like when your cat brings you a dead rat like "omg look what i caught for u i worked hard to catch it:)"

FLOWER CROWNS

making flower crowns is one of the few romantic activities that XIAO likes to do with you (minus the 😏😏 ofc)

He's weirdly good at making them too- like, sir is this what you've been doing on your freetime for the last thousand years??

Now ofc we have to discuss his karmic debt situation

at first, XIAO was a little reluctant to start a (both platonic and/or romantic) relationship with a mortal for obvious reasons

At the start of the relationship, XIAO would just disappear for the duration of when he's experiencing karmic outbreaks, where he would slay demons for days without stopping

Later on, XIAO is a little less averse to the suggestion after much convincing from you that he wouldn't hurt you. You weren't a small fry or some side character.

When his karmic debt would come to bite him in the ass, it was like he was on a period or something. He would be cooped up in his room, a little moodier than usual, and craving almond tofu.

Likes to hold and squeeze your hand during particularly severe durations.

ok now that I think of it the more I describe it the more it sounds like he's on his period

XIAO isn't gonna say it out loud (because he's a fucking tsundere) but your presence and knoeing that you're there for him makes his karmic debt just a little more bearable:)

ZHONGLI

OHOHO

This man. THIS MAN.

Finest mf on the entire surface of teyvat and beyond

Idc what ur height is ZHONGLI is probably still somehow taller

I like to think that ZHONGLI likes to assert how tall he is whenever you guys are walking side by side

ZHONGLI isn't the type to tease but this is an exception

IK HE DOESN'T HAVE HIS GNOSIS ANYMORE BUT BEAR WITH ME

When you guys are standing next to eachother he sometimes makes himself taller and say something like "Hmm. It might just be me, but, have you gotten shorter since yesterday?"

This motherfucker

He makes up for it during dinner dates

On the occassion that ZHONGLI doesn't conveniently "forget" his wallet, dates are great

Walks accross Liyue harbor are REQUIRED

He says something about humans needing to stretch their fragile bones or something.

He lowkey sounds like an alien when he says shit like that

ZHONGLI is TRA👏DI👏TIO👏NAL👏

When you started dating, he insisted that he needed your father's permission

Doesn't matter if you're a guy, girl or non-binary. He WILL ask for your father's permission (after getting yours first ofc)

Consent is sexy guys

WAKES YOU UP AT THE ASS CRACK OF DAWN (I feel sorry for you because I genuinely believe that I'm the only person on this app who has a normal sleep schedule)

Keeps muttering about "osmanthus wine" and "those who share the memory"

Ok grandpa we have to get you to bed

ZHONGLI, (of course) doesn't tell you that he's rex lapis and that he faked his death because he wanted to retire but was too much of a pussy to tell the other adepti himself

But he does like to stroke his ego by telling you "cool and epic stories of rex lapis™️" and watch as you listen with awe

Yea yea you got a big dick tell me something I don't know

ZHONGLI talks so fucking much man

It's up to you whether or not that's a good or bad thing

At least he can read you bed time stories to lull you to sleep at night. that's nice I suppose

ISTG this man. has a better night routine than anyone in liyue (or teyvat) so he makes you join him whether you like it (yes you do) or not

Dating ZHONGLI also includes dealing with his usual shenangians with Childe aka discount Ed sheeran

For a 6000+ year old god this man sure does know how to act like a 9 y/o

Have to get them BOTH out of trouble because they keep doing dumb shit !!

I am deeply disappointed ZHONGLI.

A/N ;; I now accept requests for both sfw & nsfw headcanons:) i don't have a list of who i write for yet but ill try my best <3

#genshin xiao #xiao x reader #genshin headcanons #headcanon #zhongli #zhongli x reader #zhongli x you #ganyu x y/n #ganyu x reader #genshin imagines #genshin impact #genshin spoilers

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sxftkxssxs · 3 years

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Hi! I would like to request hc for the m6 if that would be possible where they s/o is excitedly talking about something they like but one of their "friends" just snaps and ask if they never shut up, as a result they just become more quiet in general. Thank you a lot and I'm sorry if that's to specific:) have a good day

Don't worry! it's not too specific at all :) thank you for requesting!

When their s/o gets quiet after being snapped at

Asra

if he's there when they snap at you the air suddenly gets very tense

they'll defend you, very passionately.

if they aren't there, he can see you holding yourself back from talking almost immediately (they've known you almost 10 years cmon now-)

if he thinks you need time to yourself, they'll give it to you. but after a while they'll start to ask what's wrong.

when he learns that your friend snapped at you and you decided to quiet down, they can almost feel their heart breaking.

in terms of comfort, asra is the best to go to.

he offers you tea, can hold you, anything that could make you feel better

"my love, you shouldn't listen to people like that. Your talkative nature is something I love about you." You carefully took the cup of tea Asra held out to you, looking up at him. They sat down right beside you, slipping an arm around your waist. "I know I shouldn't, but what if they have a point Asra?" He let out a hum, "If they do I don't see it at all. You're perfect just the way you are." You smile, leaning back into him. Asra gives your waist a little squeeze as Faust decides it's her time to speak. "Friend! Get better!" "Will do Faust,"

Julian

He's not as keen to what's happening as Asra, but he'll catch on fairly quickly.

If he was there when your friend happened to snap at you, colorful words you didn't think existed are thrown about. looks like the rowdy raven has it's perks

if he wasn't there, he's not going to pick up on the reason unless you tell him

when he finds out what happened, he's reassuring you to the moon.

Julian has a lot of emotions towards this situation, mostly worry and concern for you.

He's the best at physical comfort. Pillow forts and long talks (Even if he's doing all the talking.)

The warmth from the mountain of blankets around the two of you is almost too much, but it's also just what you need. "-and then! He gets angry with me for suggesting leeches! As if we hadn't tried anything else. No matter how much time passed I couldn't convince him, not even once! Lucio was always stubborn you see-" You couldn't help the smile forming on your face, Julian might not be good with words but he sure knows how to tell a story. All he asks for in turn is a kiss.

Nadia

If she's there, the whole thing wouldn't have even happened.

I mean?? who would even dare insult her lover infront of her?? the countess?

More likely, she wasn't there. But she still notices that you haven't been talking as much as she's grown to love.

when she finds out it happened, she's a little angry, mostly concerned that this is what's been bothering you.

Her way of comfort and reassuring you is gifts, and with her words.

You'll feel like royalty yourself when you finally drift off to sleep.

"Is this alright my dove?" You can only manage a nod, getting comfortable in the bath Nadia took the time to prepare for you. She pulls your head into her lap. Your eyes close as she rubs the tension out of your shoulders. "You're just perfect, that friend of yours doesn't know a thing." You open your eyes to see her looking at you with all the love and adoration in the world. She plants a kiss on your forehead, a proud look forming on her face. If Nadia's so proud of the way you are, maybe being upset about it just isn't worth the trouble hm?

Muriel

dear god, help him

if he was there I don't think there was a high chance the "friend" would finish their sentence.

mans is taller than possibly anyone in the city, he looks scary to random people

if he wasn't there, he'll think he did something wrong.

When you tell him that's not the case a huge sigh of relief comes out of him. But then he finds out someone snapped at you.

he's not good at all with comfort at first, but he's trying, and that's enough to lift your spirits a little.

it's very awkward when you aren't talking as much though. He's not the talking one of the relationship.

His way of comfort is a cuddle pile, or making you your favorite food at the end of the day.

be wary of inanna, she's the designated cuddle monster of the hut. She'll latch on and won't let go until you spill the beans or feel better.

"...Here," You look at what Muriel's put in front of you and Inanna. There's a plate of your favorite food, made just how you like it. With Inanna investigating the plate, you look up at Muriel. His cheeks are a light pink. "Thank you, Muriel." He lets out a small grumble, like he does when flustered. You take this as a you're welcome and begin eating. Inanna refuses to get off of you until offered some pieces, and Muriel is sat beside you with his own plate. You might feel better immediately but, Muriel and Inanna will make sure you feel loved for just how you are. I mean, someone's gotta do the talking around here right?

Portia

no, this doesn't happen

not if she is there. she's gotten good at glaring at people from dealing with her mess of a brother

if she wasn't there, she's still got the situation down

she's no expert on saving the world but she's got comfort down

very concerned that you aren't talking as much, so it's time for mischief.

she'll drag you somewhere with prank intent or just for fun, and she'll make sure you're stuck in a pile of loving words you can't even move

Pepi does that thing all cats do at some point, weaving between your legs to mess with you

The kitchen is a mess, flour is everywhere. But Portia's face holds the brightest smile in the world. Pepi is on the counter, the originally dark colored spot on her face is splotched with powder. Then there's you, completely covered from Portia's beginning assault. But there's no reason to fret, there's a cake in the oven, and Portia even made sure you wore a shirt you wouldn't mind messy. She looks at you with an expression you can only describe as completely smitten. "There's the smile!" The only thing that could ruin the moment is- wait? is that the smoke alarm?

Lucio

No?? He's so oblivious at first istg

if he's there he does get a little worried however, friends don't say those things. You taught him that.

He'll defend you with the coldest glare known to man

if he's not there, he still realizes you aren't acting quite right

mans is a hunter what did you expect

He does get very sad when he notices you aren't talking to him as much. What's happened to his loud talking buddy :((

his love language, like Nadia's is gift giving. with a huge plate of physical touch

the puppies are all over you though. they know you're upset, and it's one of the rare times Mercedes favors you over Lucio.

You feel like a whole different person with the robe you have on. It's so much fancier than anything back at the shop or anything Lucio's given you so far. "Lucio as much as I appreciate the robe, what's this about?" He scoffs at you, like it was obvious. "You've been upset. That's the only reason you wouldn't talk with me as much. It's also the only reason Mercedes wouldn't come to me at all." After he finishes talking he pulls you into bed, holding you close. The rest of the night is full of Lucio planting kisses on your shoulders, as well as some kisses from both of the dogs that definitely places a smile on your face. (tl;dr, the dogs are better at comfort than their dad and they're all big babies)

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yakumtsaki · 3 years

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Welcome to Part 1 of Union Spare Finale Extravaganza! It’s the morning after and Daniel is picking his pesticide-riddled oranges, blissfully unaware of the fact his brother has cucked him for the second time. Real talk, is Gunther the worst sim-sibling of all time?? Like he’s without a doubt the worst one I’ve ever had in my game, but I’m starting to think he literally might be the worst one IN GENERAL.

-Oh what beautiful oranges, perfect for my ‘I love you, Melody’ cake!

Ya you might wanna hold off on putting your apron on, Dan.

Sup, Goro?

-I sense a shitshow in the near future.

You know what, I sense it as well.

-Time to peace out.

GORO NO. GOD, CAN DANIEL CATCH A BREAK

Welcome home, Mel, lol @ your outfit, now get out.

DECISION TIME. Seriously I have had it with you three bitches, whoever Gunther autonomously interacts with first is who he’s getting with and he breaks up with the other one FOREVER.

-Can you unglitch my arm first?

No, Melody looks ridic so it evens out.

Any day now, Gunther! Just pick between Glitchy and Jacques Cousteau and go chat with one of them or whatever, I’m so sick of your shit.

-You know, I think instead of chatting it’s better to be as devastating to my wife as possible!

......BRO. Legit I wash my hands off this mess, Gunther and Melody blew up their marriages all on their own free will, I can’t believe he went for the romantic dance bs RIGHT IN FRONT OF BRIT. COLD BLOODED.

-OH MY HEART. MY HEART. I CAN’T EVEN CLUTCH IT BECAUSE MY HAND IS GLITCHED. DAMN BOTH OF YOU

-HOW DARE YOU CHEAT ON ME WITH MY FORMER BEST FRIEND I STOLE YOU FROM?? HAVE YOU NO SHAME???

Melody: *loving life*

-WE’RE DONE, YOU STUPID SLUTBAG, YOU HEAR ME?! YOU’LL NEVER SEE ME OR REGINALD AGAIN!!!! -OMG :O WHO’S REGINALD :O

Brit’s want panel immediately post-break up..

..vs Gunther’s. Boy this marriage is DUNZO, I can’t believe how badly it crapped out.

-What’s the cab doing here, I saw yellow and almost went in!

Well sorry to inconvenience you, Gunther, it’s picking up your son and former wife.

-Why??

Because you’re getting divorced???

-Oh right! So I really kissed Mel in front of Brit, that wasn’t the acid?

Gunther ISTG, just fuck off to work.

It’s time to deliver the final blow so Gunther invites the Tinker-Union household over and I thought I’d have to teleport Daniel but he accepted??

-It’s been 20 years, how can I turn down my own brother when he wants to bury the hatchet?

Oh poor Daniel.. POOR DANIEL.

-Seriously!? AGAIN?!?

Bro I loled irl when he turned around and looked at me like this, he’s not even mad, literally just exasperated.

-GO TO HELL MELODY BUT I HOPE WE CAN HAVE A HEALTHY CO-PARENTING RELATIONSHIP

Ya you didn’t even have that when actually married, I can tell by Melody’s ecstatic face she’s never seeing those kids again.

-Oh God, Daniel is so hot when he’s getting slapped by Gunther! I’m starting to remember why I married him..

Mel there are no words to describe how hard you and Gunther deserve each other.

-STABBING ME WOULD HAVE BEEN A LESS BARBARIC WAY TO END THIS MARRIAGE COMPARED TO CHEATING WITH FUCKING GUNTHER, HOW COULD YOU DO THIS ME?!?

-I have no good answer but let me offer you this appalled and remorseful expression!

Melody immediately moved out but Brit missed the memo and came over to steal her newspaper.

-That will teach that homewrecking slut!! -WAAAH she doesn’t live here anymore, Brit!

Ya also you’re not holding anything?

-This was a SUCCESSFUL newspaper theft!

JuJu is back from school and they got perfect grades.

-Best day ever!! I gotta run and show Dad!!!

-WAAAAAH JULIAN, MOM LEFT US -I KNEW IT WOULD HAPPEN. I KNEW IT. NOTHING GOOD COMES OUT OF RELATIONSHIPS, I’M BREAKING UP WITH MARSHA BRUENIG TOMORROW

Melody moves in with Gunther and what can I say guys, like it or not, they love each other. He never did this ‘follow around the house for non-stop romantic interactions’ bs with Brit even tho he also had 3 bolts with her-

-and it’s ALL HE FREAKING DOES NOW. He won’t even let Melody go to the bathroom in peace.

Idk dude, if you’re a long-time reader you remember I thought these two were perfect for each other since they were teens, but when the wife-swap disaster happened and Gunther rolled the insane engagement want I was like ‘ok obviously Gun + Brit are endgame!’ and then their marriage was a complete flop even before Mel got involved.

I’ve said it before, I really feel like Gunther was only into Brit as some form of bratty early 20′s rebellion against ending up with his high school sweetheart because the speed with which this shit deteriorated was unreal, like the second he got back with Mel he blew up his marriage, even Cyneswith knows better than to do this shit, all the times she’s gotten caught it was the other guy’s fault!

So is there a takeaway here?

Love prevails?? Ya, let’s go with that, but lmao.

-Yaaay, everyone’s happy -___-

Sorry Brit, you should have read the fine print on that prenup!

Will Brittany become an Icon? Will Gunther and Melody last? Will Daniel find love again? Will JuJu grow up to be the best looking spawns this family has produced? (I can already answer the last one, yes!) Join us in part 2 to find out!

#gen 3 #spare update #ts2

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zozophoenixxx · 3 years

Text

Serotonin Booster :D🐉

How to train your dragon edition

Here are some things I had forgotten or little details I just noticed on my rewatch, maybe even Unpopular Opinions 🤭👀

✨Defenders of Berk✨

Not Astrid being pissed bc Fishlegs called her mean lmaooo

OMGGG "I would never call my father ridiculous. I'm calling my chief ridiculous" THE POWER OF THIS SCENE

The way Toothless just sat to look at the sunset.. Me too bby me too 🥺

Toothless and Thornado's shots combined was amazing!

"The first rule about the dragon flight club is that there is no dragon flight club"

Istg Meatlug and Fishlegs are made for each other

Baby whispering deaths!

OMG THEY JUST CAME UP WITH GRONCKLE IRON

I love seeing the origin of things ☺️

Wowww I just realized that Gobber has a unibrow

Sandstone makes glass

That shiny black rock makes another shiny black Rock, it also has Meatlug boiling

WOW a combination of multiple rock makes Meatlug a magnet

The way Hookfang pays more attention to Fishlegs than Snotlout is funny

Fishlegs on Toothless!!!!

"TOO MUCH FURY, TOO MUCH FURY!" JAHDHDHAH

Awwww love how Fishlegs feels happy abt being needed

DAGUR'S BACK AHH

I never understood why Dagur called Hiccup his brother but it's kinda funny

Young hiccup actually fighting is pretty badass and that shield 🥴

The way they were all trying to get Gobber to shower lmaooo

Gobber saved Gustav's life and Fishleg saved Astrid's

Am I the only one that finds the whispering deaths kinda funny, like yes they're scary but these mfs have tiny wings, a big ass head, are covered in spines and can't see like-

Newly hatched whispering deaths can be more deadly that adults bc they can't control their jaws or spines

WOW WOW WOWWWW A WHITE WHISPERING DEATH - Titanwing whispering death with red eyes OMG NO NO THIS IS THE SCREAMING DEATH I KNEW IT ‼️‼️

Wow but the pain in Snotlout's eyes 🥺

Monstrous nightmares are stoker-class dragons

Fireworms get brighter the closer they get to each other

Ohhhhh now I get the history behind Hookfang and the fireworms queen's connection

"You're not just another sword, Hookfang"

Awww the fireworm queen saved Hookfang, I ship them now JSHDHSHS

BABY ASTRID!! 🥺🥺🥺 AWWW

Flightmare - follows the glowing algae caused by Aurvandil's fire, sprays a paralyzing mist to those who it considers a threat to its survival

Aurvandil's fire = Aurora Borealis

YES ASTRID BEAT SNOTLOUT UP

Hiccup: Well, you know, Astrid, uh, training dragons isn't the only thing I think about.

Astrid: Are you actually saying that to me with a straight face?

JAHSHAHAJAJ I SWEAR I LOVE THESE TWO the way both of them said these lines I can't ✋🏼😂

The way she said the exact same thing as her uncle and even took on the name I-

I have this headcanon that bc I'm pretty sure Astrid's parents were barely mentioned in the shows or movies that her uncle was the person that was there for her the most which is another reason why it upset her to see people making fun of him

Why does whenever Astrid gets shot by a dragon she always tries to hit it off like her axe is a baseball bat? 😂

Hiccup saving Astrid in the flightmare ep🥺🥺🥺🥺

GLOWY TOOTHLESS AND GLOWY STORMFLY AND GLOWY MEATLUG ARE ADORABLE

Awww I love how Hiccup makes sure to mention the fact that "Fearless Fin Hofferson was indeed fearless, just like all the Hoffersons" 🥺🥺🥺 STOP AND THEN SHE SMILES AND HE PROCEEDS TO PUT HIS HAND ON HER SHOULDER I-🥴🥴🥴

I love how they're always interrupted whenever they're about to say a bad word

Lil terrible terrors are adorable 🥺

The fact that what they were trained for was actually useful it's crazy

Astrid: "no one is kissing me on the lips ever!!" HHSHAHAH ASTRID WHY U LYING

I feel like we don't appreciate how smart Hiccup actually is, and I don't mean that dragon-wise or building stuff-wise I mean in general. I'm in ep9 and they're finding old dragon traps to get rid of them and there was a lil breeze and he was like "there's a dry hot wind coming in from the north. It hasn't rained in 2 months. This is definitely fire weather." like how- am I the only one that would've been like okok a nice warm breeze 😩

Dude the typhoomerangs are so scary and huge wtf

I KNEW HE WAS TORCH

Torch actually built a lil relationship with Tuff just for that but of time I love it

WE'RE FINALLY GONNA SEE THE SKRILL!! I love it it's one of my favorite dragons :D

I never understood why fishlegs says his name when he's excited

Skrills - The skrill was first found frozen, it's the symbol of the Berserkers, it can stay safely frozen for decades because of their internal body temperature, can't redirect any lightning if it's in the water 😳

Y'all the skrill and the nightfury have gotta be related somehow, they're probably like cousins or sum. I mean the night fury is the "unholy offspring of lighting and death" and the skrill can control lightning AND TECHNICALLY TOOTHLESS CAN TOO REMEMBER HTTYD 3 + they also have similar physical characteristics at least Imo.

Dude this dragon is so badass 😌🤩🥰😩🥴❣️🤍🤝 I'm literally so obsessed

Wow one of the first times I see the twins actually doing sum useful

The way the shots combine🥴

Dagur has misophonia - condition where people experience intense negative emotions for sounds such as eating, chewing, loud breathing or even repeated pen-clicking [ep11]

Oh wow so they originally trapped the skrill in this show i didn't know

Wait but baby Gustav is actually adorable wtf and the fact that he and Snotlout have matching Viking hats

OMG SEE NOW I'M SEEING GUSTAV'S ORIGIN WITH HIS DRAGON AND HIS DESIRE TO BECOME A RIDER

Fanghook🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

Ruff puts fish oil on her hair to get "a greasy unwashed look"

Really hate when Snotlout doesn't accept no for an answer

THE HAND THING AHHHH I LOVE IT this time is Ruff and a scauldron

Ok guys so I did this with mi friend's puppy who I accidentally scared enough to make him piss himself and I'm pretty sure I traumatized him and now when I'm around the poor dog tries to get as far away from me as possible but one day we were kinda bonding although he still wouldn't let me pet it AND I DID THE HAND THING BECAUSE WHY NOT AND THIS LIL MF ACTUALLY PUTS HIS FACE IN MY HAND- I screamed and he left again🥺😂 BUT IT DID WORK

Scauldy🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥰😌☺️🤩🤍

Ok but ruffnut with short hair 🤩

Speedstingers

Also the way Astrid ran up to Hiccup in the ep14

Wait but the scene whenever they're fighting the Speedstingers and Fishlegs says they're too fast but Hiccup's like "not for a nightfury" and then they show Toothless dodging the Speedstinger's attack AND THEN THEY SHOW HICCUP PROTECTING HIMSELF WITH HIS SHIELD WHICH GETS THROWN AWAY BUT RIGHT THERE TOOTHLESS CATCHES IT AND THROWS IT BACK TO HICCUP who's like "Thanks bud" 🤩🤩🤩 literally so badass go watch it!! It's ep14 frozen min 17:40

I really liked the relationship Snotlout and Astrid created with each other's dragon 🥺

HOOKFANG'S WINGBLAST AND STORMFLY'S SINGLE-SPINESHOT ARE HELLA BADASS... I love how they worked together this time 🥺

DUDE JAHDHSJAJJJSA ppl really underestimate Ruff's cleverness, this bish really gets Tuff to do the dumbest things just to enjoy looking at him hurting himself JAHDHSJAH😂

TOOTHLESS REALLY JUST BIT AN EEL'S HEAD OFF TO SAVE HICCUP🥺

Baby toothless is high🥺

"Uh, okay. That one was a little close to the one good leg" JAHDHAHSHA ISTG I LOVE THIS DUDE

Johan hates Snotlout for breaking his stuff

Tuff got Macey the Mace from Trader Johan

Astrid looks hot without her shoulder pads

Ok but Dagur looks so weird without his viking hat in this show

The baby thunderdrums are adorable - BING BAM AND BOOM

NOOO STOICK JUST LEFT THORNADO 🥺

OHHH SO ALVIN WAS ACTUALLY FROM BERK and he was Stoick's best friend

Snotlout and Hiccup are parallels of Alvin and Stoick

Ok but that trick Snotlout did was amazing, he really had Hookfang do a lil typhoomerangs move and then the wingblast🤩

I FINISHED IT OMG NOW ONTO RTTE!!

#hiccup x astrid #how to train your dragon #httyd #hiccup #astrid #hiccup haddock #astrid hofferson #Snotlout #fishlegs #ruff and tuff #stoick the vast #toothless #toothcup #hiccstrid #race to the edge #defenders of berk #riders of berk

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waynedunlaptheorgandonor · 3 years

Text

watched s11ep1

i will provide you with a quick review before i disappear back into the ether of twd avoidance

lots of spoilers under the cut. also i wrote way too much and i worked all night and haven’t slept so i didn’t bother to reread literally any of it, so it might be completely nonsensical, tho if you don’t expect that from me by this point idk whose blog you’ve been reading

enjoy:

hokay, first off, i’ll start by saying that i enjoyed it more than i expected to. i’ve been avoiding any sort of discussion about stuff, but my google algorithm is so fucked at this point that i still get recommended articles and stuff every now and then, so i was already pretty aware of what i was walking into, and was expecting it to be eh, but actually i prob enjoyed it more than i enjoyed the finale

(don’t get too excited tho, the finale was rly boring lmfao)

anyway

episode starts off with a tense scouting mission

it takes .005 seconds into the episode for caryl to exchange a look of longing, establishing that they are still having weird conflict and are both too fucking stubborn to do anything about it even tho they hate it desperately

i imagine that will continue for a while

rosita, kelly, carol, maggie, what’s her face with the bad hair, and lydia (i think that’s everyone?) lower down to some army bunker or something, where a bunch of walkers are taking a snooze, and the girls are very respectful of walker naptime, and do their best not to wake them up

obviously they eventually wake up, but i’ll get to that in a sec

as they’re tiptoeing through the walker tulips, there’s this split second where carol spots a machine gun, and looks at maggie with a face like, “can i plzzzz, i am mad horny for that machine gun,” but maggie tells her no. (i 110% expected her to defy orders and accidentally wake up all the walkers, but she actually behaved herself for once. well. mostly)

never fear, tho, after the girl gang collects a bunch of MREs they go back to wait for the dudes waiting up top to pull them up, and bc men ruin everything, one of the ropes break, and daryl catches it before it falls, but then a slow motion drop of blood falls on a walker’s face, and just like that, walker naptime is over, and carol uses her bow and arrow for two seconds before she is like “fuck this” and whips out the machine gun

yes, she is super hot using it

yes, daryl watches her do it

anyway, all the other girls get rescued, and carol is about to be pulled up, but bc she is a #girlboss, she first makes a beeline for one more crate full of MREs. daryl covers her while she gets the loot, and when she gets back up top they have another charged moment as carol hands him back his knife

just fuck already, jfc

titles!

cut to alexandria where everything is still not smilestimes

BUT, we do get to see uncle daryl run and hug rj and judith (and dog), and FUCKING HERSHEL JR, LIGHT OF MY LIFE is also there

istg, they could not have casted a better child, i a d o r e him

oh, and some friends of maggie’s show up too, idk

cut to a staff meeting where everyone is like, whomp whomp, we’re all gonna starve to death unless we figure out something quick

cue maggie going, “oh, i know where food is, but it requires me to tell you my tragic backstory, in case anyone didn’t watch my bottle episode”

she tells her dramatic backstory about all her friends getting slaughtered by the reapers for no apparent reason, and then she’s like “anyway, let’s go back there!”

no one thinks it’s a great idea, but a group of people decide to go anyway, including daryl and gabriel. rosita is super pissed that gabriel is going, and carol doesn’t go, probably partly bc it’s a shitty fucking idea, and also bc they have to keep caryl apart bc otherwise they’ll fix their problems ahead of schedule and they won’t be able to drag out the needless angst

daryl looks kind of annoyed that carol doesn’t volunteer to go

bitch, i thought you wanted her to stop putting herself in the line of fire! make up your damn mind!

moving on

cut to a thunderstorm, where, if you look closely, you’ll notice daryl is wearing the STUPIDEST hat i’ve ever seen. just get an umbrella, jfc

for some reason negan is with them, bc ig he knows his way around washington dc, and no one in six years has bothered to figure out how to get around the city and/or get a map, and he is like “hey guys, maybe we shouldn’t try to walk in this fucking hurricane,” and everyone is like “FUCK YOU NEGAN, YOU’RE NOT THE BOSS OF US!!!”

this will be a common occurrence

but eventually daryl is even like “actually, it’s rly unpleasant out here, and my hat is mad stupid, can we go inside plz?”

so they go inside an old metro station, which is actually a rly cool cinematic choice. i rly like the idea, and they executed it rly well

speaking of executions

there are some fucking RULL CREEPY walkers. idk why they bothered me so badly, but they were what they at first assumed were corpses wrapped up in tarps, but turns out none of them had been properly put down, so they go through killing these rotted bodies that had supposedly been there since The Fall, and it’s very gross and cool

this entire time, btw, negan is like “hey, i know i’m a shitty person, but i have some rational arguments about why we shouldn’t be doing this right now,” and everyone is like, “FUCK YOU NEGAN, YOU’RE NOT THE BOSS OF US!!!” and he’s just like “god fucking damnit”

(i forgot to mention that at one point, when they’re headed into the metro station, negan is trying to warn ppl of the potential danger, and everyone is ignoring him, and he tries to talk to daryl, and daryl is like “fuck you, you think we’re BUDDIES?” and negan is like “oh, ok, so you’re gonna be like that too? fanfreakingtastic” and it’s very funny)

anyway. a fat monster zombie escapes its tarp at one point, and tries to eat some npc, and negan saves him, again is like “hey, anyone else realize that this is a FUCKING BAD PLAN?”, and everyone is like “we don’t care, you’re still shitty and we’re not listening to you, and you don’t actually care about random npc i would literally not be able to pick out in a lineup bc his face is so generic, you’re not the boss of us!!!”

it’s at this point that negan finally is like, “why am i even here? bc i know how to get around washington dc? do none of you have a map?” and i was like, “right?! that’s what i said!”

it’s then revealed that maggie only brought negan along to murder him under the guise of “oops, he got hurt in the line of duty, it wasn’t my fault,” and daryl has this look on his face that says, “i seriously need to stop hanging out with lethal women bent on revenge bc it’s gonna give me high blood pressure,” and maggie has a badass moment where she points a gun she has for some reason at negan and is like “i have like, one shred of human compassion left inside of me, and if you keep pushing me i will fucking kill you without a second thought, so shut the hell up”

(in her defense, negan had just dropped glenn’s name to purposely antagonize her, which was rude as hell)

(for the record, i’m completely on maggie’s side here, but negan still is right that trapping themselves in a metro station is a bad call)

anyway, moving away from that briefly

i think this jump cut happens sooner, i don’t actually remember, but whatever who cares, point is, we get to the part of the show that actually matters, and that’s anything involving my love, juanita “princess” sanchez

and also eugene, yumiko, and ezekiel

they are being asked increasingly invasive questions by commonwealth ppl, some of which i wish they actually would of answered (what do they use to wipe their asses with?? surely toilet paper has long since become extinct)

zeke, who is so much more tolerable as a character now that he’s not larping as a king, has this incredibly weird and sort of sexually charged moment with a dude in an orange stormtrooper costume, where he’s like, “i bet you were an asshole cop back before The Fall, you stupid fascist, #fuckthepolice, mb literally? idk, this moment has a lot of pent up aggression that could easily translate to hate sex, it might just be the intense eye contact, but w/e, let’s just move along,” and then he has a coughing fit to remind the audience that he’s currently dying of cancer, and orange stormtrooper is like “lolz, loser, drink some water you dumb piece of shit”

cut to the wholesome foursome sitting at a picnic table in a guarded courtyard eating gruel, and yumkio, who finally has a personality, and princess are like “hey, this place fucking sucks, can we leave?” and zeke is like, “yeah, i met this orange stormtrooper who i think might be dtf and/or murder, so we should probably bounce”

but eugene is like, “but i want some hot stephanie ass, and also some bullshit excuse about how mb commonewealth will save alexandria” which, they left before things went super downhill, right? idr. it was after hilltop fell, but they don’t know alexandria got fucked either, if i recall? w/e, not important

two seconds after he says this, they talk to some people who are like “we’ve been here for four months, or maybe it’s been nine, i don’t actually remember, i’ve stopped processing the passage of time,” and the wholesome foursome takes this as a bad sign, tho that’s just the life i’ve lived as a night worker during a pandemic, so i was like #mood

but then they watch some guy get dragged away screaming to get “reprocessed” and eugene is like “ok, nvm, let’s bounce”

(my theory on what “reprocessing” is, is that they’re stuck in a room and have to watch hours and hours of customer service training videos on vhs from the 90s)

i definitely got my jump cut scenes mixed up bc i think the negan accusing maggie of a murder plot thing happened in between this scene and then the next commonwealth scene, but w/e, i’ll just finish what happens in the commonwealth arch

the wholesome foursome are trying to hatch a plan to escape, except princess, my love, is distracted watching some stormtroopers flirt, and the other three are like “wtf, dude, how can you even tell any of them apart?” and princess then tells them every stormtroopers backstory bc she is brilliant and pays rly close attention to shit, and the other three are like, “this is useful information, thank you for being an insane person”

their plan involves yumiko and eugene dressing up as stormtroopers and leading princess and zeke out of the place, which works fine actually, except on their way out they come across the Depressing Wall of Probably Mostly Dead Missing Loved Ones

they’re about to leave, when princess is like, “wait, yumiko, you’re on here, that’s weird huh?”

sure enough, yumiko is on the wall, with a note from ig her sister

the scene ends with yumiko going, “guys...i can’t leave...i have tragic backstory to unveil”

tragic backstory to be continued ig

back in murder metro town, npc and some other npc have stolen all the supplies, there’s a train blocking the track, and a horde of walkers are coming towards them, so things are not going fantastic

they horde is too big to take down, so they start to climb on top of the train car to get away

but dog runs away!

and daryl, being every pet owner ever, is like “gotta go get my dog, guys, try not to get killed while i’m gone, c u soon!” and he ducks under the train and disappears

#priorities

the episode ends with maggie climbing up the train car but getting grabbed by a walker and dangling off the edge, and negan is there and they have a lion king moment where maggie is like, “scar! help me!” and negan is like “long live the king, bitch” and walks away into the shadows, leaving maggie to a potential death

which, while i know isn’t actually going to happen, would be a really fucking funny move on the writers’ part

like, “look, lauren’s back! and now she’s dead, bet you didn’t expect that!”

anyway

my assumption is negan will actually end up helping her up or something, continuing his ambiguous morality bullshit that actually isn’t ambiguous bc he BEAT GLENN TO DEATH WITH A FUCKING BAT WRAPPED IN BARBED WIRE IN FRONT OF HIS PREGNANT WIFE

the maggie/negan arch is kind of dumb, but whatevs, i’ll tolerate it, as long as my boy glenn gets justice in the end

anyway, cue credits!

final assessment: good episode. i’m much more interested in commonwealth than the reapers, tho i am hoping that daryl’s personality-less ex turns out to be a monster killing machine with no conscience, that’ll be fun. princess is a gift from god. hershel jr needs his own tv show. needs more carol (and caryl)

the end! going back into my walking dead free chamber! see you next episode!

-diz

#i didn't mean to recap the entire fucking episode lol #sorry #it's to make up for my lack of content lately #or something #anyway #caryl #twd s11ep1 #twd s11 spoilers #dunlap tp

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cheelduh · 3 years

Text

Dreamer

Pairing: Childe x fem!reader

Warnings: Dubcon (consent and set boundaries are implied), fingering, hand job, filth istg, they don’t go all the way. MINORS DNI.

Word count: 600

Synopsis: You wake up to a pleasant surprise ;)

Note: FIRST TIME WRITING SMUT LMFAO BYE 😭 unedited

Rough, obscene panting is what graces your ears, drawing you far away from the pleasant lull of sleep. The groans seem to get more frantic, erotic, has you clenching your legs as your bleary vision tries to adjust.

You're staring at him, wide awake, and he's a mess in the sheets, head tipped back, locks of sweat perfused hair framing illuminated by the crystalline shine gifted by the moon. Stunning, with lashes fluttering, forehead creased in concentration, gasps he efforts to conceal.

Each piece of him picturesque, from the way his bitten lips gasp your name in a silent prayer, to the thin sheen of sweat catching the moonlight, glittering angles that thieve your breath away. Calloused fingers of his, the ones that sow the seeds of anguish, the ones that trace distinct patterns on your shoulder, wrapped tightly around his pulsating cock, glistening with promise.

He's not doing it right. Too rough, too detached, an expectation to get it over with, enough haste to sate yet not satisfy completely.

Cool air encompasses your being, brushing along the surface of your skin, and you momentarily glance down to see your nightshirt tugged up and over your breasts loosely, nipples stiff into pebbles, coated in translucent moisture.

"Ajax," You call out to him, and he's near mindless when his eyes snap open, half lidded, lolling to the side.

"Hnng ahh, go—go to sleep." There's something sensual about his gaze that sends a spark in the confines of your panties.

Wetting your digits in your mouth— "Why didn't you wake me?" You snake a hand over his veined arms, mapping along your journey until you reach his stuttering hand, gently prying it off to cease his reckless pumping. "Let me help."

"Didn't wanna," He hisses when you encircle the tip of his cock head, index delicately dipping into the slit for your generous offering. "Didn't wanna wake you, work tomorrow."

Free hand trails your stomach, up until it reaches your exposed breast, and you give it an experimental squeeze.

Ajax drools at the sight, entranced by the sheer wantonness of the act. It only serves as a catalyst to the hunger, warm coil forming in his lower stomach from your skillful ministrations.

He shifts positions so he can muzzle into your neck, kissing wet trails, tip of his tongue flicking out to taste your supple skin.

You whine, tugging him softly, controlled, and he takes the chance to slip a hand between the soft silk that covers your cunt. Useless flimsy little thing that's only in the way of his prize.

"Why didn't you—hnng wake me?" You mutter again, this time against the plumpness of his lips. "Want to suck your cock, want it to burn through my throat. Ah...you're so mean Ajax."

"Let me make it up to you, love."

He ruts against your palm, mouth latching onto your breast, desperate and impatient. You shiver when his tongue circles your nipple, teeth nipping lightly, just the way you like it.

Suppressing a groan, he's fingering you languidly, building up the tension you crave constantly from him. And when a nosy thumb brushes against the wetness of your core, running circled frictions on the beginnings of your clit, you mewl.

He releases with a vulgar pop, allowing your ravishing moans to favour his ears. "Almost there love, shit gonna-gonna fuck you stupid after this. Don't—Don't stop."

Your fist increases in speed, the action breaking your moaning with the shameless squelching of fluids, hips that swivel in motion, running, no, chasing, for release.

Ajax bucks into your hand one last time, buries his face in your neck with a salacious groan that's enough to send you over the edge with a shuddering moan. Bodies convulsing into each other, riding out highs, crying and groaning, sweet whisperings of love, the pleasure is all too much.

And right when you think it's over, he rolls you over and is ready to take you in all the ways he's dreamed of.

#genshin impact #genshin impact oneshot #childe x reader #childe #fanfic #genshin oneshot #genshin tartagalia #ajax x reader #tartagila #tartagalia x reader #genshin imagines #genshin x reader

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i-need-air · 4 years

Note

Your blog makes my heart explode, it turned in the place i go to whenever I want to feel butterflies and uwu!!! I was wondering, how would a relationship with Bakugo be with a foreigner, like would he embrace their culture or would he see a future with that someone? I saw this study that japanese men find foreign women attractive but just for fooling around and not marriage stuff and my mind went there idk maybe it sounds weird. Fell free to ignore this if it's weird heh

Appreciate your words! You're absolutely adorable and now I'm the one feeling butterflies! 💖💗💖💗💖💗🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋

And wow, that's interesting to say at least and I googled it myself to see; I'm not gonna lie, it's not surprising and it points out that the cultural difference could be a problem in long term relationships that's why they're more reclutant about marriage. Japan is very traditional so that's why I said I'm not surprised and honestly it's an issue in multicultural couples everywhere. Been there, felt that...

That being said, let's talk about Bakugou:

× i 100% stand by this: Bakugou dates to marry.

× could definitely leave the ask like this and feel good about myself bc i trust those words.

× one thing about this man is that if he likes you, he likes you

× it's a matter of attitude, not origin, not heritage, not quirk related, not looks, but your personality

× even before dating he will research about your home country and traditions as the curious man he is [ thinks it's not a big deal, he just wants to know where your dumbass came from, like whateverrr who caressss ok but what did you say your birth city was called? how do you spell— 💀]

× and if you are still learning about japanese ones, he will teach you about it in his own way because of two points.

he genuinely wants you to like Japan; it's is homecountry, his origins, he grew up with those traditions and would like to enjoy them with you

it's an excuse to spend time with you; he might act a little indifferent about it [ as he avoids being aggressive with you ] but he likes your company and the small smiles he sends you give him away

× if you're still trying to learn japanese, don't worry, he's a nerd so he knows English but will point out mistakes in grammar or pronunciation; don't mind it, again, he won't mock you, he actually respects you for actively trying to learn another language and mastering it

× even if he did read about your country, he won't ask about it much before dating and it will take him some time to ask afterwards too; absolutely does not mind if you do start talking about your country on your own though since he's learning new things about it and about you, which he then adds to his mental PowerPoint about you

× why doesn't he ask, you say? at first he's interested in your personality and once he's sure he's into you, he'll then slowly think about having a future together, and this guy, this guy is a thinker so he goes through all scenarios; another thing is this dumb pomeranian wants to keep his indifferent act;;

× he does think about cultural differences but doesn't see them as a problem. if you managed to catch his attention and got him to think about a future with you? he's gonna embrace your culture altogether; you already won him, congrats

× food will connect you two and i feel he'll use cooking time to bond together

× he will teach you how to cook japanese food so maybe teach him recipes from your culture? if you don't know, pull some recipes from google and make a disaster together, he doesn't mind much; istg he's gonna cook better than a local grandma after a couple of tries 💀[ specially if you're homesick and enjoyed his other tries, Chef Bakugou will basically do it for u bby ]

× traditions are a big thing too, so whenever you celebrate something he will pay close attention and definitely butt in and ask; the difference from before is that he doesn't have to pry to find out, it comes naturally and that saves him some blushes and the conversation can be more natural while keeping that indifferent pomeranian act i told you about before [ as you bond closer he will get over this issue, don't worry ]

× "So what's it about?" says in a bored tone but his eyes give him away, curiosity getting to him

× just tell him but please, tell him about your past and memories related to those traditions

× language, you say? if your mother language is english he will perfect it bc of you and if it's not;;; ok look, he's a lil shit, ok? so guess who learns how to call you a dumbass in your own mf mother language? ye, that's right

× this is a whole fluff hc but he's extra at doing things, right? when he knows he loves you and tells you the first time, he will tell you in your language

× bc your face is priceless and that's his shit; legit cocky grin and snickers in your face

× tell him "I love you" back and watch him turn into a stuttering tomato

× it will become common between you to say it in your language, it's like a secret only you two share

× by secret i mean everyone knows he's a simp but now ✨international✨

× once Bakugou knows it's time to meet your family, he will actively learn it though, at first without your help; he still has this dumb idea that he has to be the best at everything without seeking help but once you find out and he sees how absolutely enamored you are by his actions, you'll become his tutor [ full time job and you get paid with food and sneaky forehead kisses ]

× he can't pronounce something? gets angry and tries until he does; he ain't a quitter 💅

× makes you repeat the words a lot though, he likes watching your lips move and the way you speak? y e s

× one thing that is make or break in the relationship is where you decide to live long term so pretty early in the relationship you'll know he's not moving away from Japan

× he has his goals and dreams and definitely wants you in them but moving away is something i feel he wouldn't do

× yet he's all up for vacations twice a year or so; remember he wants to be a hero so he won't have time to go more than, but he will want to explore your country with you by his side, also to meet your family and put to test those tutoring classes he got from you;

× once you're married and have kids [ yeah, he wants the whole package ] know for a fact those kids will take part in both cultures; loves your heritage and wants to pass it to the future generations; imagine multilingual mini-Bakugous, i—💖💗💖

× his parents! the Bakugou household is pretty modern and they wouldn't have a problem at all with you being a foreigner; they'd be very interested in learning about your culture too and honestly, they don't mind where you are from as long as you love their son [ they feel blessed someone can handle his dumb ass but ok ]

× fashion designers as they are, they gonna be interested in your traditional clothing; seriously, they'd love to know everything about the topic and even implement them in some of their designs if there's no issue from your side

× overall once Bakugou knows he wants to pursue you, he will go all in for you

× bc he a simp and genuinely appreciates everything about you 💕

#boku no hero academia #bnha #mha #noire writes #bakugou katsuki x reader #bakugou #bakugou x reader #bakugou headcanons

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jess-rewatches-prodigalson · 4 years

Text

It’s All In The Execution (S2, E1)

It happened. We got a second season. I’m living my best life...unfortunately Malcolm isn’t...

*** Content warning: brief mentions/allusions to depression, suicidal ideation, and Malcolm’s general poor mental health ****

SPOILERS AHEAD.

0:00 - OH HELL YES. I can’t believe we actually got a second season! <3 My heart is so full.

0:18 – “This ledge is taken.” …..ok so I have lots of feelings about this scene. 1) Malcolm’s lines are iconic in this scene and I love it. 2) WHY THE ACTUAL HELL WOULD JT, DANI, AND EDRISA AGREE TO LET A (LET’S BE HONEST) MAN IN A VERY BAD MENTAL STATE WITH A HISTORY OF DEPRESSION STAND ON A LEDGE FOR A CASE?!? Like seriously, Gil wouldn’t have gone with this shit. 3) As soon as I saw Malcolm on the ledge I believed he was seriously considering jumping. He showed passive suicidality most of last season and after Endicott – well I don’t blame him for being a little depressed.

0:26 – Damn. Malcolm is really manic in this scene. It’s reminiscent of the pilot episode in the sense that Malcolm really has no filter.

0:40 – Ok so Tom Payne deserves a freaking Emmy. This performance is gorgeous. Look at his facial expression when he says “It got real dark for me though. Family issues.” The look on his face completely convinces me that Malcolm is riding the struggle bus more than usual right now…..also am I the only one who thinks this ‘penthouse slasher’ is kind of unbelievable? He strikes me as too anxious and jumpy to be a serial killer.

1:18 – Is Malcolm even trying to hide the fact that he knows what happened to Endicott?!? I mean “I tried to fight it” can’t JT and Dani hear his usual ‘projecting his personal issues on the suspect shtick?’

1:30 – Did he really just scream “I am the Surgeon’s son” from a ledge?!? Dude – someone please give this boy a hug and get him to Gabrielle – like last month.

1:40 – Soooo… now Chester isn’t scared of the ledge? He looked like he was going to wet himself from fear a literal minute ago.

1:49 – OH OF COURSE CHESTER SLIT THEIR THROATS. JUST LIKE AINSLEY SLIT ENDICOTT’S. Chris Fedak really loves to inject Malcolm’s personal issues into the ‘serial killer of the week’.

2:23 – I’m sorry – the team let Malcolm on the ledge without tethering him first?!? No. No. No. I refuse to believe it. Dani, JT, and Edrisa care too much about Malcolm to let him do that.

2:28 – Why is Edrisa even on this stakeout?!? Did she fill in as the 4th team member while Gil was in the hospital?!? I love Edrisa – she’s hilarious but the fact that she’s in the field like this is absolute nonsense. Hahaha

2:32 – hahaha OMG. JT is like the big brother forced to hang out with his younger sibling and their weird friends. He’s think’s they’re all crazy but he’d also die for them.

2:42 – Yikes. Malcolm is questioning his moral code. This boy is headed for a real nasty downward mental spiral if someone doesn’t intervene quickly.

2:46 – Am I really supposed to believe that a rope tied to a radiator can hold the weight of two grown men dangling off a building?!? I mean – I’ll suspend my disbelief because I know it’s fictional entertainment but I found it really distracting.

2:48 – JT. Would. Not. Let. Go. Of. That. Rope. I REFUSE TO BELIEVE IT. If for no other reason than because he loves GIL too much to let Gil’s surrogate son fall to his death. I understand why this happened – tension and excitement for television in the first scene of a new season but honestly – this whole first scene is wildly unrealistic given what we know about JT, Dani, Edrisa and their respective roles on the team.

2:50 – Can we talk about JT’s facial hair for a sec? I like him with it (and without it). Part of me thinks he grew it because he’s trying to channel Gil while he’s temporarily in charge of the team.

3:08 – Honestly, the second Malcolm picked up his phone all I could think was “You moron. What if you drop that thing off the side of the building!?!?!”…then I remembered that he’s rich.

3:20 – “Please say it’s cancer.” Hahahahahaha OMG. I have a love/hate relationship for Malcolm with no filter. That’s freaking comedic gold.

3:57 – “I’m hanging in there.” Tom Payne is freaking incredible. Look at his facial expression here. Malcolm’s emotional pain is etched on that face. Ugh. I’m love.

4:02 – soooo no updated title screen. Interesting.

4:08 – Istg the writers only put Ainsley in this scene so she would be in the episode. I mean honestly – what kind of precinct lets reporters with a camera crew INSIDE?!?!

4:15 – hahaha I love JT in this scene. I love how he initially looks at Ainsley with a mixture of confusion, resignation, and fear. This is a man who does not like the camera.

4:16 – Side note: is it just me or is Ainsley acting very manic in this scene? Something about her energy reminds me of Malcolm circa 1x05 when he’s not sleeping and trying to convince everyone that he’s fine.

4:38 – hahahaha OMG. That wink.

4:48 – Even Malcolm looks surprised that Ainsley and a camera dude were let into the precinct.

5:00 – Ahhh the hand tremor. <3 Love that they’re still using that.

5:05 – also Malcolm is heartbreaking in this scene. Someone give him a hug. Look at how hard he’s trying to hide his pain, fear, and trauma. UGH.

5:33 - So we finally get to see it. The moments immediately after 1x20. Or do we? I have this crackpot theory (I posted it on my main blog, so you might’ve already seen it – “AllTimeBouvier”) that these flashbacks are only a fraction of the truth. I think Sophie walked followed Malcolm from the vet’s office to the hospital, then home. I think she hid when she heard Endicott’s voice due to fear but came out after Ainsley started screaming and stabbing. Besides – anyone else notice how the portion of these flashbacks where Malcolm is saying “Ainsley, focus on me. You didn’t do this. I did.” Only his right hand is ever in the frame. So it’s impossible to tell if he’s holding his cell (on the phone with Martin) with his left hand or if he just hung up and put the phone back in his pocket? I think that Martin either phoned Malcolm back or Martin heard Sophie’s voice and demanded to talk to her. I think Sophie disposed of the body while Malcolm took care of Ainsley like a good big brother. I think Sophie went into hiding and Martin is gaslighting Malcolm into believing that he disposed of Endicott’s body.

5:37 – Anyone else want to know what happened to the murder weapon? And Ainsley’s bloody clothes? Just me?

6:00 – hahahahaha Jessica is so extra. I love it.

6:29 – Wait. What? Why was Ainsley quarantined with Jessica? Ainsley has her own apartment. If Jessica forced Ainsley to come and live with her during quarantine – why didn’t she also force Malcolm? This doesn’t track for me.

6:40 – I love that Jessica brought Malcolm food (you can see the grocery bag behind Malcolm in one of the shots) and went so far as to actually lay out the breakfast ingredients for him. <3 I mean. It’s extra but it’s also sweet.

6:45 – Why is Jessica looking at Malcolm’s pill bottles? Is it just to avoid eye contact with Malcolm while she talks about Gil? Is she noticing that his dosage has changed (she’s extra so I’m assuming she knows exactly what meds he takes and how much of each). Is that part of the reason why she’s suspicious of Malcolm? His dosage has gone up and he’s clearly trying to hide his pain?

6:52 – I love how Malcolm interacts with Jessica in this scene. It’s so cute. They’re adorable. AND seeing Malcolm in casual clothing is always nice.

7:44 – “Oh about that.” Damn. Malcolm really can’t catch a break. Poor baby. : (

7:50 – hahaha Martin looks like a mountain man here. Completely deranged and un-groomed.

7:51 – Glad Mr.David isn’t dead or evil. I had fears.

8:35 – The tension between Dani and Malcolm seems to have lessened since 1x20. The trust seems to have been partially rebuilt. Partially. Dani is still suspicious.

8:38 – Well at least Malcolm’s still going to therapy.

8:41 – GREEN SUIT. HELL YES.

9:06 – “The ‘Drise knows.” OMG hahahaha I love this show. Look at how Malcolm looks at her hahaha.

9:17 – “I can fire these people right?” OMG. 10/10. JT REALLY SHINES IN THIS EPISODE. AND FRANK HARTS IS KILLING IT and the writers gave him so much well deserved screen time and great lines.

9:53 – Malcolm and Edrisa getting excited about murder is honestly so freaking cute.

10:34 – OMG. The way Malcolm perks up at the mention of rumours is hilarious. A learned behaviour from Jessica during his childhood?

10:45 – I’ll say it again. Chris Fedak was wasting Frank Harts in season 1. This dude is shining in this episode. I hope they keep giving him more lines and screen time than they did last season.

12:00 – I love seeing Malcolm this excited/happy but it’s pretty concerning that his passion is murder weapons.

12:04 – This scene is really interesting to me for four reasons 1) Where the eff did Dani go? I guess she’s probably on her way to see Gil? 2) Even though Malcolm is getting excited about murder he’s way less manic than he was earlier this episode. 3) I love watching JT deal with Edrisa and Malcolm’s nerdy excitement. I could watch it all day. So fun. 4) I love watching JT and Malcolm in scenes together. Period. I can honestly say that watching their friendship evolve is one of the highlights of this show for me.

12:30 – Heartbreaking. Malcolm had a few minutes where he forgot about Ainsley, Endicott, Martin, and the various traumas currently haunting him. Then he not only remembered but he saw Martin in himself. The crazy person collecting murder weapons. You can tell he feels embarrassed, ashamed, and sad. I genuinely believe that’s why JT says, “soooo weird.” with a look of sympathy and concern. JT doesn’t suspect that Malcolm has anything to do with Endicott’s murder at this point in time. Mark my words.

12:55 – Edrisa gets Bright. I will never ship them together but I really hope they get more scenes together this season. Their friendship is beautiful.

13:00 – Malcolm, baby, no. You don’t have to do this. Ugh. Poor baby. This is just going to make the night terrors worse.

13:10 – They trimmed Martin’s beard but not his hair between the first scene in this episode and now. I think they just combed his hair? Why?!? Was this a Michael Sheen request? I must know!!!

13:40 – hahaha OMG. Can we all just take a moment to appreciate how incredible Michael Sheen is?!? This man can go from downright terrifying to hilarious in a split second. Incredible actor.

13:55 – Sooooo Mr. David doesn’t know about Endicott? Because he’s definitely heard Malcolm and Martin discuss some pretty sketchy stuff over the years. I’m pretty sure he heard about the Sophie stuff last season didn’t he? Why is Martin finally trying to hide something from Mr. David?

14:03 – Look at Malcolm’s face. Ugh. He looks nauseous and scared. Someone hug him. Or better yet – get him away from Martin.

14:18 – Sooooo is Jerry going to be a problem later? Martin ‘cures him’ later in this episode so will he be able to tell someone he heard Martin and Malcolm talking about Endicott’s murder? Would anyone believe him?

14:40 – GO. TO. HELL. MARTIN. You’re not feeling it?!? Haven’t you caused enough emotional damage to your son. Stop. Trying. To. Manipulate. Malcolm.

14:50 – Question 1000 about how Endicott’s body was disposed of: Where the hell did Malcolm get that yellow jumpsuit on such short notice? And….those gloves – anyone else notice that they’re practically the same as the gloves he puts on in Izzy’s sex dungeon in a few minutes? ALSO – THEY FOUND ENDICOTT’S BODY IN ESTONIA?!? LIKE ALL OF IT OR JUST PARTS OF IT? WOULDN’T IT BE SMARTER TO SCATTER HIS BODY IN MULTIPLE COUNTRIES IF IT’S ALREADY IN PIECES?!? Unless maybe Endicott’s body isn’t in pieces because we all know that Malcolm’s memory of traumatic events is fuzzy at best.

15:07 – “Don’t. Say. That. Never, say that.” - I’m really proud of Malcolm here. He’s clearly in serious emotional distress throughout this whole conversation. He’s grappling with what he believes he did, what that means about him, his moral code, and his relationship with Martin. But yet – he found the strength to basically tell Martin to eff off.

15:20 – AMAZING. Right after Martin says “Estonia?” there are a few seconds where it genuinely looks like Malcolm is going to cry. It’s moving as hell, heartbreaking, and some downright kickass acting.

15:56 – Well, that’s not going to help Malcolm’s night terrors. But we definitely have confirmation that Jerry wasn’t as engrossed in the cartoons as Martin suggested.

16:20 – I love this scene. Gil is the whole team’s surrogate father – not just Malcolm’s. Sometimes I forget that. Also – the fact that Chris Fedak waited 16 minutes to show us Gil Arroyo alive and well is a crime.

16:28 – “He wouldn’t dare.” “I know.” How cute is this? Look at Dani’s smile. Ugh. I can’t decide if they know that JT doesn’t want Gil’s job because he loves working with Gil too much or he doesn’t like how much responsibility comes with Gil’s title. Probably a combination of both.

16:35 – Sooo has Malcolm not been visiting Gil? I guess because of COVID he couldn’t but now he’s just not? I mean – Gil would be able to tell how Malcolm’s doing just by looking at him.

17:05 – I’m sorry ‘multiple surgeries’?!? I want elaboration on this.

17:09 – So I googled “British musician Izzy” and the top hit was the guitar player for Guns’n’Roses (who looks kinda like this guy). I have no idea what that means but I found it interesting.

17:30 – Holy shit. Izzy is a nutcase. I love him. hahaha

17:55 – Soooo Malcolm keeps a spray bottle of some sort of magic “show me the blood” water? Nah – the writers wrote it into the show for this scene’s convenience.

18:05 – I love this. Malcolm’s nonchalant approach to his mother and Gil’s budding relationship. He’s like a little kid who doesn’t want to get his hopes up. He’s using the mentality of “If I don’t acknowledge it, it’s not happening. Therefore, if it goes wrong – I won’t get hurt by it.” It’s really sad and I wish he didn’t run away from something that will potentially be good but I also get it.

18:06 – I also respect Malcolm a lot in this scene and am irritated by Dani. Look – they both adore Gil. They’re both protective of Gil (and in Malcolm’s case Jessica). Here’s where they’re different: Malcolm recognizes and respects that Gil and Jessica are adults who can make their own decisions. Dani doesn’t. Dani is acting like a preteen trying to break up Dad and the new step-mom she isn’t sure of. Dani and Malcolm both have their hearts in the right place but I disagree with Dani’s response to the relationship. I also understand where she’s coming from given what we know about Dani’s bio Dad.

18:39 – It’s not supposed to be funny but holy hell. Malcolm putting his head on the floor to listen is hilarious.

19:00 – I’m getting major John Watkins flashbacks. Malcolm breaks down a lot of walls where serial killers once hung out. Is that supposed to be some sort of subtle comment on Malcolm’s character?

20:33 – Damn. Malcolm’s hair is long this season.

20:55 – aannnnnd here are the murder gloves from the Endicott flashbacks.

21:30 – Something about Malcolm dancing to this music in this supremely manic state is really upsetting to me. It just makes me uncomfortable.

22:13 – I’m so worried about Malcolm right now. Holy hell. Get him to Gabrielle. NOW.

23:00 – A skil saw. Pretty much a small version of what Malcolm thinks he dismembered Endicott with. Yikes. Fedak really loves making Malcolm project his issues on murder suspects.

23:27 – Yep. Dani totally thinks Malcolm killed Endicott. She thinks he’s gone dark side and followed Martin’s footsteps. This is not going to be good for their friendship or the trust that they’re rebuilding.

23:50 – One of my favourite things about this show is that it can go from dark and creepy to family sitcom-esque drama in a second. It helps lighten the show’s tone a little. I mean honestly – most of the fans are here for the family drama as opposed to the ‘killer of the week’ storyline anyways.

24:10 – I love this. Jessica admitting to Malcolm that she and Gil have been discussing him for almost 25 years. You can see that Malcolm is 1) a little freaked out and 2) a little touched. For a moment you can see how badly he wants Gil and his Mom to have a long-lasting romantic relationship.

24:32 – OMG. Why did Jessica call Ainsley about Malcolm’s mental state before calling Malcolm? Is that standard Whitly family practice? I have questions.

24:40 – Yep. Dani is Concerned and Scared.

26:46 – Sooo we all agree that Martin was trying to electrocute Jerry to death right? I mean “You really shouldn’t have done that Jer-bear.”?!?! And he’s literally a serial killer?!

27:25 – Mr. David is having none of Martin’s bullshit – so how did Martin get away with it? What does Martin have on Mr. David?

27:50 – “A miracle.” Omg. Hahahaha. I love this show. So. Much.

28:09 – “clearing her brother’s name. Not murder.” Seriously, the parallels between this case and Malcolm’s personal issues are more obvious than usual this episode. Almost to the point where I’m annoyed that the other characters aren’t really catching on.

28:35 – “What happened, his brain break?” I love the way JT can simultaneously tease and be concerned about Malcolm. Ugh. It’s beautiful (and hysterical).

29:07 – Not again. Please stop putting JT in front of the camera. I’m getting second-hand embarrassment and anxiety on his behalf. It hurts to watch (funny too, but mostly painful).

29:19 – Look at Gil. Hahaha he’s so amused by JT’s awkwardness in front of the camera – but you can also see how proud he is. <3 I love papa!Gil.

29:33 – “Police work is patience.” Cute 1x05 callback. And can we all just take a minute to appreciate how much Gil loves Dani. Just look at his proud Dad face!! <3 Warms my cold, dead heart.

30:00 – Oh yeah, Dani is suspicious.

30:04 – I love how Gil seems to be the only person who truly understands Malcolm and all his quirks. <3 I love how much Gil loves Malcolm. <3 I just…ugh. <3 <3 <3 • 30:11 – “I’m a good big brother.” That line cut through my heart. He shouldn’t have been put in this position – choosing between his moral code and his brotherly instincts. It’s not fair and the stress of it is literally killing him.

30:17 – “Messed them up.” Them!?!? I’m sorry Dani, when did you and Gil start talking about Malcolm AND Ainsley?!? Last I checked this was a 100% Malcolm conversation. …she’s not wrong though.

30:33 – “There’s nothing we haven’t talked about.” I love what that suggests. To me – that means they when Dani has a bad break up, they talk about stupid stuff like what they’re cooking for dinner and songs that make them happy. I love that it suggests that Dani and Gil have talked about Jackie. Malcolm might be Gil’s fake-son but Dani is sooo Gil’s fake-daughter. <3 I can just see him getting all overprotective when she gets a new boyfriend even though he knows damn well that Dani is more than capable of taking care of herself – he can’t help it, Dani is his little girl. <3 <3 <3

31:00 – Ugh….ok. So this scene. I’ve seen a lot of mixed reactions about it. I have a bit of a mixed reaction myself tbh. On one hand, I love that they have the type of relationship where they can openly discuss this. On the other hand – it feels forced and it really rubs me the wrong way. Dani is just way out of line here. She’s totally attacking Jessica and Gil is kind of letting her? I mean I think it upsets me so much because Gil isn’t even really defending Jessica. Also, that line about Jackie thinking the Whitly’s are cursed?!? Wtf is that?!? No. No. We know that Jackie loved Malcolm like a son. Jessica has said that Jackie was kind. What is this cursed nonsense?!?!? I refuse to believe it. And the fact that Jessica heard it all breaks my heart. Like – it physically hurts me to watch this scene for all of the above reasons. But I also kind of understand why we got the scene – to further explore the Gil+Dani dynamic and to add some angst to the Jessica/Gil romance.

33:00 – Oh hell yes. I love this danger.

34:10 – Amazing how calm Malcolm is while the killer is literally going through his murder weapon collection. Like he hasn’t been this calm all episode?

35:10 – Ahhhh here’s manic!Malcolm.

35:25 – “Is it my hair?” Okay so totally hilarious, but Dani is listening to this. Can she tell that Malcolm is clearly (and weakly) deflecting the comment about him being a killer like Martin?

35:40 – Malcolm is scared. :( Someone please hug him. This is the most honest he’s been all episode. My heart is broken.

36:20 – Soooo did Malcolm just abstractly tell Dani that he’s a justice killer? Nahhhh I’m totally typing out of my ass.

37:00 – He was on the Harvard fencing team?!? Why is that adorable?

37:34 – Malcolm just cut a dude 3x. No remorse. No more fear. He’s calm. I’m terrified. Does he like hurting the killer?

37:50 – I think Dani suspects that Malcolm killed Endicott. Yep. Definitely.

38:00 – Gorgeous. Absolutely gorgeous. This scene with JT and the cops is heart-wrenching. The fact that Dani and Malcolm come to his rescue is beautiful. The fact that JT is clearly terrified but not angry is perfect. I hate that this scene had to be made but I love how it was executed.

38:31 – Look at Malcolm’s confused, white, rich face here. He genuinely can’t believe that cops just racial profiled one of the only good people who ever accepted a serial’s killer’s son as a friend.

38:40 – I’m crying. JT’s fear (and Frank Harts’ acting) is so believable and completely haunting. I hear the subtext in this scene, “What if those cops killed JT? What would happen to his pregnant wife and unborn child?”, “How is JT going to financially support his family if he loses his job unfairly?”, “How messed up is it that a literal military veteran is terrified of fellow police officers?”.

38:44 – “You didn’t do anything wrong.” This line gives me hope. Malcolm isn’t too far gone. Malcolm still knows right from wrong and he still has a heart of gold.

38:55 – Ok. I LOVE that Gil magically shows up in this scene. BUT HOW DID HE KNOW TO COME TO THE PRECINCT?!?! LIKE WTF? Because Malcolm and JT look surprised to see Gil. Dani just looks relieved – did she call Gil?

39:10 – Gil is an absolute A+ human being. I love him. I will die for him.

39:33 – OMG. JT’s big watery puppy dog eyes have ripped my heart to shreds. <3 :(

39:45 – When I first saw this I thought Malcolm was hurt by Gil’s “and whatever Bright is”. But upon re-watching it – Malcolm looks surprised and so so touched. I’ll be honest – I don’t think Malcolm’s mental state would be so bad right now if he had had regular contact with Gil throughout COVID. Gil is Malcolm’s rock. His literal example of what a good man looks like – without him during a traumatic time Martin creeps back into Malcolm’s psyche.

40:15 – Sooo Martin is still definitely lying to Malcolm.

40:20 – Stupid little thing – there never used to be a toilet on Jerry’s side of the room. And what happened to all of Martin’s books and stuff? Did Claremont put it in storage? I mean he’s a serial killer? Jessica certainly didn’t store it for him.

40:37 – Amazing. As soon as Malcolm physically sees Gil he comes to Martin with a renewed faith in his moral code. (“I stop killers. I don’t help them.”)

41:30 – “Please don’t torture yourself for that.” Martin is right BUT that’s also why I hate him. Martin is manipulating Malcolm right now. He’s trying to convince Malcolm that he genuinely cares and loves his children. Thus destabilizing further Malcolm’s mental state.

41:36 – Also – both Tom Payne and Michael Sheen are acting their asses off here. *chef’s kiss* 10/10. I love to see it.

41:45 – Aaaannnnd there’s Martin the asshole. Completely screwing with Malcolm’s mind. Again. What a dick. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him.

42:00 – Look at how scared Malcolm is. I genuinely think Malcolm (whether or not he actually dismembered Endicott, I suspect he didn’t) feels good when he remembers doing it. This is BAD for Malcolm’s mental health. Yikes. : ( Poor baby.

Ok. So that’s the first episode of season 2. I really liked it. It wasn’t perfect but I’m excited for what this season might bring. Be back next week.

27 notes · View notes

waveypedia · 4 years

Text

complete and utter chaos [ducktales group chat fic] - Chapter 4

Ao3 I Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3

let kids be kids

6:55 am

ICanDeweyIt: WHAT IS UP GAYS AND GALS

TheWebbedWonder: hi :3

Junior-Woodchuck74: you couldn’t have waited five minutes

ICanDeweyIt: it’s the kids gc uncle donald won’t know

Junior-Woodchuck74: knowing him he’ll find a way

ICanDeweyIt: true

ICanDeweyIt: anyway what’s up

Junior-Woodchuck74: over half of us live in the same house as you and we’re all sleeping

TheWebbedWonder: im not

Junior-Woodchuck74: you should be

Junior-Woodchuck74: you stayed up until 3 on facetime with Lena

lenaonme: yes and

Junior-Woodchuck74: when you and Violet come over we’re going to have a talk about healthy sleep habits

lenaonme: you’ll never catch me, nerd!!

ICanDeweyIt: SHUSH huey im bored

Junior-Woodchuck74: I know

adefinitelyrealboy: do you like cat videos, Dewey?

green-sharpie: oh no

adefinitelyrealboy: Webby and I have been sending some back and forth to each other!!

TheWebbedWonder: Finally a fellow cat video enthusiast :3

green-sharpie: webby istg

ICanDeweyIt: oh YES

adefinitelyrealboy: yay!!

adefinitelyrealboy: I’ll send them right away <3

Family Group Chat!!!

7:01 am

mutant-krill!!!!: good morning everyone!!

ICanDeweyIt: good morning!!

Lucky-Gander: good morning!

Lucky-Gander: What’s the haps today

lenaonme: please never say that again

TheWebbedWonder: I WANNA GO CAMPING

TheWebbedWonder: WHO’S WITH ME

Junior-Woodchuck74: Webby, we just started planning a sleepover

Junior-Woodchuck74: and you’re allegedly planning an adventure?

TheWebbedWonder: I am :3

Violet-Sabrewing: please stop using that emoticon

TheWebbedWonder: :3 :3 :3

adefinitelyrealboy: oh!! That’s so cute!!

TheWebbedWonder: I know :3

UnoCaballero: maybe focus on one thing at a time, webs

TheWebbedWonder: ugh fine

Adventure-Pilot: do you need any help planning your adventure?

TheWebbedWonder: Ooh are you offering?

Adventure-Pilot: sure!

TheWebbedWonder: !!! I’d love that!!

Adventure-Pilot: 💖💖💖

Tea Time: Stop stealing my children.

TheWebbedWonder: aww Granny!!

TheWebbedWonder: It’s okay you can both be my parental figures 💖

TheWebbedWonder: I have lots of them!!

ICanDeweyIt: Webby’s winning in terms of parental figures tbh

Junior-Woodchuck74: true 😔😔

TheWebbedWonder: >:3

green-sharpie: stOP

TheWebbedWonder: no >:3

dr. mad scientist: thanks i hate it

Tea Time: Which one of you children taught him that

Blathering-Blatherskite: I feel déja vu

Lil’ Bulb: I did :3

green-sharpie: NOOOO THEY’RE MULTIPLYING

TheWebbedWonder: YES

TheWebbedWonder: EMBRACE IT

ICanDeweyIt: never

ICanDeweyIt: YOU’LL NEVER CATCH ME

TheWebbedWonder: I CAN AND I WILL

green-sharpie: lol run

Junior-Woodchuck74: Dewey just got up and sprinted away

lenaonme: webby ended our call :(

ICanDeweyIt: you guys called AGAIN

lenaonme: yes and

UnoCaballero: is someone else joining our chat today?

DosCaballero: wym?

Junior-Woodchuck74: Well, Webby seems to add one person every single day

Blathering-Blatherskite: except for yesterday, when she added both of you!

DosCaballero: hah! we’re special!

DosCaballero: @TrêsCaballero get over here we’re being special

TrêsCaballero: Did someone say special?

TrêsCaballero: Because I am very special! ✨

Junior-Woodchuck74: btw Tío José most people use that emoji ironically now

TrêsCaballero: Oh? Well I suppose they just couldn’t handle the sheer power of me! ✨

lenaonme: heck yeah reinvent the world break those stereotypes

lenaonme: @UnoCaballero stop editing my texts

TrêsCaballero: I will!

TrêsCaballero: the sparkles emoji was invented specifically for me

DosCaballero: oh absolutely

UnoCaballero: stop swearing then

lenaonme: ur not my dad

UnoCaballero: but I am your uncle

lenaonme: skdfghgfds

lenaonme: ok

Junior-Woodchuck74: @Blathering-Blatherskite answer my DM

Scrooge-McDuck: don’t distract my employees at work lad

Blathering-Blatherskite: sorry I was getting something for webby

Scrooge-McDuck: you are working

Blathering-Blatherskite: yes that

dr. mad scientist: hey DUMMY

dr. mad scientist: get over here and work on this chart

Blathering-Blatherskite: why are you texting the mega group chat we're literally in the same room

Scrooge-McDuck: see laddie? work. work that needs to be done

Scrooge-McDuck: I’m not paying them to waste time on their phones, you hear?

ihaveahead!!!: i’m not sure if this is meant for huey or for us

Lil’ Bulb: probably both

Scrooge-McDuck: it’s both

ihaveahead!!!: that checks out

TheWebbedWonder added M.A.M.A.

Blathering-Blatherskite: M’MA!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: oh hello Ms. Cabrera!!

M.A.M.A.: hello!!

Scrooge-McDuck: oh no my employee productivity!!

adefinitelyrealboy: Hello! I’m Boyd, a definitely real boy!

M.A.M.A.: um, alright.

M.A.M.A.: nice to meet you, Boyd!

adefinitelyrealboy: my name is an acronym just like yours!

M.A.M.A.: Oh really? What does your name stand for?

adefinitelyrealboy: Be Only Yourself Dude!

M.A.M.A.: Well that’s certainly wholesome.

adefinitelyrealboy: thanks! I picked it out myself!

adefinitelyrealboy: what does your name stand for?

M.A.M.A.: María Antonia Magdalena Aldonsa. It’s my name!

TheCrashiestCrash: neat!!

Scrooge-McDuck: welcome Ms. Cabrera, now my employees need to get back to work

UnoCaballero: ok lol

Scrooge-McDuck: what does that mean?

Scrooge-McDuck: Donald, what does that mean???

UnoCaballero: have fun~

Scrooge-McDuck: DONALD FAULTEROY DUCK

dr. mad scientist: HAHAHAHAHAHA your middle name is faulteroy???

Adventure-Pilot: dude your name is literally gyro you don’t have much of a leg here to stand on

dr. mad scientist: neither do you, DUMBELLA.

moonlander-general: HAHAHAHAHA is that really your full name??

Adventure-Pilot: shut up shut up

dr. mad scientist: that’s what you get

Blathering-Blatherskite: Gyro got banned from Starducks because he cursed out employees who thought his name was an allusion to the sandwich

dr. mad scientist: it’s not MY fault they can’t see the brilliance in a perfectly good name!!

dr. mad scientist: i picked it out myself!!

green-sharpie: oh, so it’s perfect in every way

dr. mad scientist: yes!!!

dr. mad scientist: wait was that sarcasm

dr. mad scientist: if that was sarcasm you will rue the day!!!

Scrooge-McDuck: Gyro, what did we say about threatening children?

dr. mad scientist: not to.

Scrooge-McDuck: good!!

Scrooge-McDuck: now get back to work

DosCaballero: you really have a one-track mind huh

Scrooge-McDuck: HEY

Lucky-Gander: he does care a lot about money

wreathedingold: ugh it’s the opposite

wreathedingold: he doesn’t care enough about money

Scrooge-McDuck: come now Goldie

Scrooge-McDuck: i put my family above my money and i’m not shy about it

Tea Time: as you should.

Scrooge-McDuck: thank you, Bentina.

Teach Penny and Mom Pokémon Group Chat!!!!

11:22 am

ICanDeweyIt: ok what’s your favorite pokemon

ICanDeweyIt: this is for science

Junior-Woodchuck74: did you finally escape from webby

ICanDeweyIt: shhh i’m hiding

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: not for long

ICanDeweyIt: nO

ICanDeweyIt: anyway

ICanDeweyIt: i’ll go first

wildlymisunderstood: i don’t like pokemon

TotallyNotGizmoduck: LIES

ICanDeweyIt: NO

ICanDeweyIt: i can’t believe you’d do this to me gyro

wildlymisunderstood: dr. gearloose

ICanDeweyIt: treason

ICanDeweyIt: treason of the highest caliber

ICanDeweyIt: this calls for… public execution!!!

wildlymisunderstood: lol no

aw-phooey: dewey…

ICanDeweyIt: anyway i like keldeo and jigglypuff

lenaonme: >:o neither of them are even blue

ICanDeweyIt: part of them are!!!

lenaonme: who are you and what have you done with dewey

ICanDeweyIt: shut UP

green-sharpie: anyway i like snorlax

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: leaked louie fact: he would snuggle with a snorlax

aw-phooey: confirmed

green-sharpie: whaaaaat they look vv cozy

green-sharpie: tell me you wouldn’t

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: okay fair

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: i’m writing down “snorlax plushie” as a gift idea!!

green-sharpie: OOOOOH 👀

green-sharpie: WEBS YOU’RE THE BEST

green-sharpie: the rest of you need to step up

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: 🥰🥰

green-sharpie: hey you know what i also like

green-sharpie: meowth

green-sharpie: meowth plushie go

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: i’ll put it on the list!

aw-phooey: louie

universesgreatestadventurer: louie

Junior-Woodchuck74: louie c’mon

green-sharpie: ugh fine

ICanDeweyIt: webby go

green-sharpie: you’re just trying to distract her aren’t you

ICanDeweyIt: yes and

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: fairy types!

wildlymisunderstood: of course

aw-phooey: i like Gyarados!

Lucky-Gander: as you should

moonlander-general: that sounds like Gyro’s name

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: ooh yeah it does!

wildlymisunderstood: I suppose Gyarados is deserving of my name

universesgreatestadventurer: oh my god-

wildlymisunderstood: della shut up

universesgreatestadventurer: hey

aw-phooey: hey

wildlymisunderstood: any pokemon would be better anyway though

aw-phooey: no they’re not

wildlymisunderstood: incorrect

TotallyNotGizmoduck: hey don’t fight!

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: uhh

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl changed green-sharpie’s name to Snorlax’s Cuddle Buddy

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: tell me i’m wrong

wildlymisunderstood: you’re wrong

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: shut up you don’t actually think that you just wanted the chance to tell me off

wildlymisunderstood: truth

Snorlax’s Cuddle Buddy: okay valid

Snorlax’s Cuddle Buddy: but how does that solve anything

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: idk

ICanDeweyIt: mom wbu?

worldsgreatestadventurer: my team consists of a growlithe, a lucario, a garchomp, a zorua, and a sneezel!

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: oooh very concise i like it

worldsgreatestadventurer: thank you, dear!!

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: 🥰🥰 skdfdksl;df

ICanDeweyIt: cool cool cool

ICanDeweyIt: writing that down thank you

worldsgreatestadventurer: should i be worried?

aw-phooey: nah

PM between TotallyNotGizmoduck and lenaonme

2:44 pm

lenaonme: yo

TotallyNotGizmoduck: hi, Lena.

lenaonme: so

lenaonme: huey yelled at me

TotallyNotGizmoduck: haha sorry

lenaonme: geez don’t apologize when i’m trying to apologize lmao

TotallyNotGizmoduck: oh! Uh.. i’m not sorry?

lenaonme: that works i guess

lenaonme: anyway it was supposed to be just light teasing i’m sorry for being mean

TotallyNotGizmoduck: it’s okay

lenaonme: you don’t have to say that

TotallyNotGizmoduck: it is though!

lenaonme: okay thanks

lenaonme: and please for the love of all things magic change your name

TotallyNotGizmoduck: one day

lenaonme: but really

lenaonme: i am sorry

TotallyNotGizmoduck: well… I hereby accept your apology!

lenaonme: kjsdfhgjfkdls

lenaonme: thanks

TotallyNotGizmoduck: anytime

2:53 pm

TotallyNotGizmoduck: oh and Lena?

lenaonme: yeah?

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I know we don’t really talk but I still care about you

lenaonme: huh

lenaonme: thanks

lenaonme: i really am sorry

TotallyNotGizmoduck: it’s okay

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I’m here if you need me

lenaonme: thanks

lenaonme: I might take you up on that one day

Family Group Chat!!!!

3:34 pm

UnoCaballero: is everyone okay?

UnoCaballero: sound off

green-sharpie: yep

Scrooge-McDuck: here

Blathering-Blatherskite: yeah, what’s going on?

Junior-Woodchuck74: Mom and Webby unleashed a portal to the boiling isles during their adventure research

Blathering-Blatherskite: oh shoot, do you need Gizmoduck’s help?

Blathering-Blatherskite: cause I can call him. Yeah. i have him on speed dial

Blathering-Blatherskite: cause so many of Gyro’s inventions go haywire!

Lil’ Bulb: oh my god

dr. mad scientist: not evil.

Blathering-Blatherskite: that’s not what I said.

dr. mad scientist: just wildly misunderstood.

Junior-Woodchuck74: Fenton…

TheCrashiestCrash: I think we’re good! Thanks!

Blathering-Blatherskite: No problem!

TheWebbedWonder: yeah but it was fun! And I’m a lot closer to figuring out our adventure!

TheWebbedWonder: thanks!

Adventure-Pilot: anytime sweetie!

dr. mad scientist: your family is ridiculous

wreathedingold: seconded

Lucky-Gander: agreed

Adventure-Pilot: aw, you love us

lenaonme: you guys realize you’re all part of the family right

Violet-Sabrewing: the group chat is called “Family Group Chat”

TheWebbedWonder: don’t forget the exclamation points!!

Violet-Sabrewing: of course.

TheCrashiestCrash: Dewey and I are still wrangling the last of those demons, mr. d!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: then why are you texting?!

Junior-Woodchuck74: hang on, i’m coming over.

TheWebbedWonder: me too! woohoo, more demons to fight!!

lenaonme: oooh i’m coming over!!

Indy_Sabrewing: maybe not…

lenaonme: oh come on

lenaonme: we face way worse all the time!!

purpleisforthegays: oh that’s true…

Violet-Sabrewing: I’ve already packed by nunchucks.

purpleisforthegays: oh you girls are going to give me a heart attack one day.

Indy_Sabrewing: don’t worry honey, I’ve already doubled our vacation fund budget. I just had to take some away from the Junior Woodchucks donations.

Junior-Woodchuck74: aw man

lenaonme: 😔👊

Violet-Sabrewing: It do be like that.

green-sharpie: [screenshot-my-longest-yeah-boi-ever.png]

Indy_Sabrewing: Lena, you’re corrupting her.

lenaonme: as i should.

Tea Time: we all do need a vacation one of these days.

ICanDeweyIt: ooooooh

Junior-Woodchuck74: Dewey! More fighting, less texting!

ICanDeweyIt: I can multitask!

Junior-Woodchuck74: no you can’t!

Junior-Woodchuck74: studies have shown that multitasking is, on a nanosecond level, virtually impossible

ICanDeweyIt: well, impossible is just another kind of possible!

Junior-Woodchuck74: no it’s not.

ihaveahead!!!: why are you guys texting each other in the main group chat when you live in the same house?

ICanDeweyIt: because we can.

Junior-Woodchuck74: because he’s ignoring me and I can’t hear much over these demons

Lucky-Gander: checks out.

TheCrashiestCrash: we’re all good here!

Scrooge-McDuck: I think that’s the last of them.

mutant-krill!!!!: can you possibly save any specimens for me to study when I arrive in Duckburg?

green-sharpie: webby has ten.

Junior-Woodchuck74: i think Mom has a couple too.

Adventure-Pilot: sure do! and I’d be happy to share!

mutant-krill!!!!: great, thanks!

Blathering-Blatherskite: wait, are you coming to Duckburg?

dr. mad scientist: oh blathering blatherskite not again

Lil’ Bulb: be nice.

mutant-krill!!!!: based on the star and naval patterns I’ve been tracking, Mitzy, Gladstone, and I should be arriving in Duckburg in a couple days!

Junior-Woodchuck74: why didn’t you tell us in advance? We have to prepare!

mutant-krill!!!!: sorry little donald! But this is in advance!

Junior-Woodchuck74: okay fair

ghostbutler: @Tea Time

Tea Time: What

ghostbutler: the house is disgraceful

Tea Time: You bail every time a fight breaks out!

ghostbutler: one of the perks of the afterlife

Tea Time: ugh, you are insufferable.

Scrooge-McDuck: Duckworth was there! He and I fought together!

ICanDeweyIt: can confirm; i stuck my hand through him again!!!

ghostbutler: every time you do that i want to die and i’m already dead.

Tea Time: You saw me fighting twenty demons and bailed immediately.

ghostbutler: it’s a compliment! I figured you could take care of yourself!

ghostbutler: was I wrong?

Tea Time: no.

ghostbutler: perfect! And you still need to clean the house.

wreathedingold: I sense petty drama that somehow I did not cause.

wreathedingold: the world is unbalanced.

Scrooge-McDuck: oh don’t worry, you’ve caused plenty more than your share of petty drama

wreathedingold: oh Scroogey, you flatterer!

dr. mad scientist: i will never understand their romance.

M.A.M.A.: You and me both, and I’ve only been here for a couple of hours!

Blathering-Blatherskite: hey, you two finally agreed on something!

dr. mad scientist: you take that back!

Junior-Woodchuck74: just going to point out that we literally finished fighting five minutes ago and there’s already another fight

green-sharpie: what did you expect from this family?

Junior-Woodchuck74: okay fair

TheWebbedWonder: I’d like to think we’re pretty good

TheWebbedWonder: especially compared to like the Beagle Boys and Mark Beaks and his mom

dr. mad scientist: HA that’s what he deserves

dr. mad scientist: mark beaks? how about no

ihaveahead!!!: we do not stan

dr. mad scientist: thank you

dr. mad scientist: me seeing mark beaks' name: wish i was jared, nineteen

green-sharpie: KHGFDFGHKLKHGFDSDFGH

Violet-Sabrewing: Don’t be mean

dr. mad scientist: i will not be lectured by a child!

M.A.M.A.: (or anyone)

dr. mad scientist: you say that like it’s an insult but it’s true

ihaveahead!!!: but you’re insulted, aren’t you?

dr. mad scientist: shut up.

TheWebbedWonder: hey Violet’s very knowledgeable!!

Violet-Sabrewing: thank you Webbigail!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: It’s interesting; both of those dysfunctional family dynamics are caused by power abuses and imbalances and lack of communication

Junior-Woodchuck74: both of them have gone far beyond that, but that’s the root of the problem

purpleisforthegays: interesting!

DosCaballero: forgive me, but who are these people again?

dr. mad scientist: god i wish that were me

moonlander-general: villainous fiends!!

DosCaballero: oh okay

DosCaballero: @TrêsCaballero time to fight! The Three Caballeros ride again!

TrêsCaballero: the Three Caballeros ride again!

UnoCaballero: The Three Caballeros ride again!

moonlander-general: Are you three going to say that every time you do something together?

Scrooge-McDuck: You get used to it lassie

Scrooge-McDuck: What you DON’T get used to is three freeloaders mooching off your house and food!!

UnoCaballero: haha bye Uncle Scrooge! Villanious villains to fight!!

Adventure-Pilot: Ooh, fights? Where?

UnoCaballero: not for u lol

Adventure-Pilot: HEY!!

M.A.M.A.: Should I be worried you’re all so eager to be violent or-

dr. mad scientist: you’ve punched me multiple times

M.A.M.A.: you deserved it

M.A.M.A.: And I’ll do it again

dr. mad scientist: noted

Scrooge-McDuck: please don’t incapitate my employee when he should be working

M.A.M.A.: So i’ll do it when he’s off the clock, got it!

dr. mad scientist: hey!!

Lil’ Bulb: he’s always working anyway

dr. mad scientist: true

Scrooge-McDuck: that’s right! You need to work less, lad. I don’t want the unions telling me to pay you overtime

dr. mad scientist: so I can get punched?

Violet-Sabrewing: only if you deserve it

dr. mad scientist: very encouraging, thank you /s

M.A.M.A.: you always deserve it

dr. mad scientist: there we go

TheCrashiestCrash: hey don’t worry Dr. G!! I think you’re a nice person!!

dr. mad scientist: that is factually incorrect but thank you

Blathering-Blatherskite: okay okay let’s all calm down

M.A.M.A.: just say the word, pollito, and I’ll punch his face in

Blathering-Blatherskite: that’s the opposite of what I was going for but thank you M’ma

TheWebbedWonder: YES VIOLENCE!!!

Blathering-Blatherskite: Webby no

TheWebbedWonder: I do think Fenton’s right though! Some problems are better solved with love and compassion

TheWebbedWonder: no matter how much I like punching things!!

Tea Time: that’s my granddaughter!

Scrooge-McDuck: atta girl!!

TheWebbedWonder: aww thank you 💖💖

adefinitelyrealboy: I agree! Talking and understanding can solve a lot of problems!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: statistically, a lot of problems are caused by simple miscommunication!

DosCaballero: especially in sitcoms and the like!

green-sharpie: it’s funny tho

purpleisforthegays: no, it’s just hard to watch

lenaonme: the secondhand embarrassment is real

Violet-Sabrewing: sometimes it’s done well, but that’s fairly rare. Of course that’s all an opinion.

TheCrashiestCrash: you gotta be careful to explain yourself before the problems get big!

Adventure-Pilot: that’s pretty insightful!!

PM between Junior-Woodchuck74 and TotallyNotGizmoduck

4:53 pm

Junior-Woodchuck74: Did you see the news?

TotallyNotGizmoduck: no I’m on the clock

TotallyNotGizmoduck: what happened? Is Gizmoduck needed?

Junior-Woodchuck74: I’m not sure

Junior-Woodchuck74: But there was another supposed PK sighting

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Interesting

TotallyNotGizmoduck: That’s the third time this week, and the seventh time this month

Junior-Woodchuck74: Some of them are definitely fake

Junior-Woodchuck74: But this one looks pretty real

Junior-Woodchuck74: If it’s faked they did a pretty good job

TotallyNotGizmoduck: my legal shift ends in forty minutes and Mr. McDuck will be displeased if I stay behind, but as long as I don’t mention overtime it should be fine

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Gyro does it all the time

Junior-Woodchuck74: Don’t take an example from Dr. Gearloose’s sleep schedule

TotallyNotGizmoduck: It is very unhealthy

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I’ve pulled my fair share of all-nighters working on projects, thought

Junior-Woodchuck74: That’s not the same though

Junior-Woodchuck74: I swear that man never sleeps

TotallyNotGizmoduck: He does

TotallyNotGizmoduck: at his desk

TotallyNotGizmoduck: for a couple minutes

TotallyNotGizmoduck: When Manny and I hide the coffee

Junior-Woodchuck74: of course

Junior-Woodchuck74: Well, thanks Fenton! Talk tomorrow?

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Of course

PM between Junior-Woodchuck74 and lenaonme

7:31 pm

lenaonme: so

lenaonme: i talked to fenton today

Junior-Woodchuck74: How did it go?

lenaonme: good, i think

Junior-Woodchuck74: That’s great!

lenaonme: he’s too nice for his own good

Junior-Woodchuck74: Well, you say the same thing about Webby, so I know that’s a compliment!

lenaonme: oh shut up

Junior-Woodchuck74: You know I’m right

Junior-Woodchuck74: anyway I think you guys will be friends!!

lenaonme: i think so too

Junior-Woodchuck74: Lena

Junior-Woodchuck74: You have no idea how happy that makes me

lenaonme: that’s what i’m going for

Junior-Woodchuck74: aww you softie

lenaonme: don’t tell anyone i have a reputation

Junior-Woodchuck74: I think you already ruined that one sorry Lena

Junior-Woodchuck74: we all see how you act around the Sabrewings and Webby

lenaonme: fair

PM between Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl and worldsgreatestadventurer

7:51 pm

worldsgreatestadventurer: did you get everything you needed?

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: yeah I got the amulet!

worldsgreatestadventurer: perfect!

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: I almost have the entire adventure mapped out

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl we just need the key from the goblin realm!

worldsgreatestadventurer: you didn’t get that from the Demon Monarch?

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: they got thrown in goblin jail for a diplomatic miscommunication a few years back and lost it

worldsgreatestadventurer: well that’s fine! more adventure for us, then!

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: woo-oo!!

worldsgreatestadventurer: so, how do we get to the goblin realm?

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: I got the incantation we need to open a portal from the Demon Monarch!

worldsgreatestadventurer: perfect! Do you want to invite Lena and Violet over?

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: do you even need to ask?

worldsgreatestadventurer: I guess not!

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: Violet and Lena are my supernatural summoning buddies! The boys just don’t have the same penchant for it as we do :(

worldsgreatestadventurer: ngl i think Louie got traumatized by one of your summonings

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: yeah, we try to do it when he’s out of the house now

worldsgreatestadventurer: good to hear

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: other than that, I finished the map of the rock course based on the testimony we got from that weird flesh creature from the other dimension!

worldsgreatestadventurer: haha yeah… that was weird…

worldsgreatestadventurer: let’s not think about that!

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: fine by me!

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: Do you want to play Death Soccer Obstacle Course with Dewey and I?

worldsgreatestadventurer: do I!!

Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl: meet you in the backyard!

worldsgreatestadventurer: I’ll be there!

Family Group Chat!!

8:34 pm

Junior-Woodchuck74: So.

Lucky-Gander: oh no

Blathering-Blatherskite: This can’t be good

DosCaballero: Donal’ used to do the same thing when he was mad!

UnoCaballero: I still do

UnoCaballero: and I am mad

TrêsCaballero: oh no

mutant-krill!!!!: what happened, little donald?

Junior-Woodchuck74: Dewey’s in the ER

M.A.M.A.: what? What happened? Do I need to arrest someone?!

Blathering-Blatherskite: Is there an evildoer on the loose?!

adefinitelyrealboy: oh no!! I hope he’s okay!!

TheCrashiestCrash: wait!! Dewey’s injured??

Tea Time: Launchpad you drove him there!!

TheCrashiestCrash: oh yeah!!

Lucky-Gander: ?

Tea Time: Dewey has a broken leg, but he’ll be fine

Junior-Woodchuck74: He was playing soccer on Webby’s obstacle course and jumped out of one of the third story windows

ihaveahead!!!: oh dear

ICanDeweyIt: it’s called death soccer obstacle course, dear hubert

dr. mad scientist: well I can see where the death part comes in

ghostbutler: In reality a broken leg is fairly tame compared to death

lenaonme: oh true

Violet-Sabrewing: you both would know

Indy_Sabrewing: Hey, be nice. Dewey just broke his leg.

TheWebbedWonder: there’s lots of death! Dewey’s just good enough to escape with only a broken leg!!

dr. mad scientist: jeez you are all crazy

lenaonme: so are you lol

ihaveahead!!!: you have no moral high ground here

Junior-Woodchuck74: Lena, what did we talk about?

lenaonme: bruh

lenaonme: sorry

ICanDeweyIt: nah ur good

dr. mad scientist: eh it’s true

dr. mad scientist: i’m a scientist i don’t hide from the truth

ihaveahead!!!: …

Lil’ Bulb: are you sure about that

dr. mad scientist: shut UP

dr. mad scientist: you will be silent or i will make you

ihaveahead!!!: oooh i’m so scared

wreathedingold: ooh secrets!

green-sharpie: i am looking

dr. mad scientist: oh blathering blatherskite

ICanDeweyIt: hey this is about me remember?

Junior-Woodchuck74: dewey oh my god

green-sharpie: ok i won’t go with you to the hospital then

green-sharpie: i’ll sit on the couch and watch ottoman empire

ICanDeweyIt: you won’t you love me too much

ICanDeweyIt: right? Louie?

ICanDeweyIt: LOUIE???

ICanDeweyIt: quick everyone help me spam his pms

dr. mad scientist: i have better things to be doing

lenaonme: i spam his pms daily it won’t make a difference

ICanDeweyIt: yall are the worst 💔💔

UnoCaballero: so no one’s going to mention that that’s just not nice

UnoCaballero: ok

Adventure-Pilot: you’re just salty that I spam your pms daily

Adventure-Pilot: kids did i do it right? Did i use the slang???

TheWebbedWonder: yes good job!!

lenaonme: congrats

Junior-Woodchuck74: good job mom!!

Adventure-Pilot: heck yeah!!

green-sharpie: shut UP i'm coming

ICanDeweyIt: I knew you couldn't resist the Dewey charm!!

green-sharpie: oh trust me, it's very easy

green-sharpie: it's harder to not resist it

ICanDeweyIt: but you do, because you loooooveeee meeeeee

green-sharpie: ...fine

ICanDeweyIt: 😌👊

Junior-Woodchuck74: DEWEY GET OFF YOUR PHONE YOU'RE ABOUT TO GO IN

PM between 22 and ghostbutler

11:25 pm

22: bitch

ghostbutler: How crass, Bentina. It fits you.

22: bitch

ghostbutler: blocked

22: unblock me

ghostbutler: yes?

22: bitch

names (as of the end of the story)

Huey: Junior-Woodchuck74 Dewey: ICanDeweyIt Louie: Lou / green-sharpie* Webby: TheWebbedWonder / Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl* Donald: aw-phooey* / Dadnald Scrooge: Scrooge-McDuck* / Moneybags Della: worldsgreatestadventurer* / Adventure-Pilot / universesgreatestadventurer /acepilot Beakley: 22 Launchpad: TheCrashiestCrash Lena: lenaonme Violet: Violet-Sabrewing Duckworth: ghostbutler Gyro: worldsgreatestinventor* / dr mad scientist / wildlymisunderstood Fenton: TotallyNotGizmoduck* / Blathering-Blatherskite Manny: ihaveahead!!! Lil' Bulb: worldsgreatestinvention* / Lil' Bulb Gladstone: Lucky-Gander Fethry: mutant-krill!!!! Indy: Indy_Sabrewing Ty: purpleisforthegays Goldie: Wine-Aunt* / wreathedingold Penny: moonlander-general

*main

*kicks down door* WE'RE BACK BAYBEE!!!!

I'm really sorry about the wait. I didn't intend for it to be this long. I did have a suspicion I might need more time, especially since the day I was originally supposed to post this was the first day of school and just before that I had just pounded out a pretty major piece of writing in two days, so I was a bit burned out. But I've had low motivation because of school, and I've also been working on a pretty big project - I'm writing the script for a fangan comic on instagram (cerealronpa)! (it was pretty fun working on this story and that at the same time because they have COMPLETELY different moods haha.) It won't be out for a while yet and the premise is pretty different from my usual stuff, but I highly encourage you to check it out when it comes out.

anyway between Cerealronpa and school I definitely have less time and motivation than before, so I might push this back to updating every two weeks instead of weekly, sorry about that. I'm not entirely sure if I'll be able to even stick to that, given how long it took me to get this one out, but I'll do my best! it's a little better now that I've settled into a routine anyway.

for the life of me I could not figure out a good username for Officer Cabrera when I was planning this, so I think the wait turned out well because of Frank's ask! I was writing her introduction and trying to think up one on the fly when I was like oH WAIT- djsdfgfd

a very very big thank you to everyone who replied to my tumblr post or discord message(s) about what pokemon the ducktales characters would have! if you responded to this fic offering to help me with pokemon I haven't forgotten that it's just talking to new people is scary so I chickened out this time sjdfgfdfghgfd i'll get you sometime! But for now this is good. I tried to include every pokemon people gave me so I hope it makes sense! Also a thank you to my friend Moon, who's a very big Pokemon fan but not a Ducktales fan, and who did her best to help me. She won't see this but she deserves a shoutout anyway.

Della and Webby's dynamic is one of my favorites so expect more of it!! I was surprised to realize I hadn't written an PM of them yet so here we go!! There'll definitely be more of it in the future.

also there are lowkey Weblena hints in this one if you squint since I just kind of vibed with it while I was writing, but if Weblena's not your cup of tea don't worry. I love me some good Weblena any day, but the focus of this fic has and always will be family and character dynamics. I'm not sure how it'll play out but I love Webby and Lena's dynamic, romantic or platonic, so just a heads up!

don't pull all-nighters like Gyro unless you really need to, kids. get some sleep, it's good for you!

there's a very small tdp reference and a lot3c reference in here and i'm really curious if anyone will catch them 👀

there's also a very small line that's me just like Gyro trans? Gyro trans. Anyway you can pry trans Gyro out of my cold dead hands please and thank you

I think the "Gyro got banned from Starducks" thing is from a very very old discussion (like 2 years ago dsddfgjaksld) I think it might've been @fangirl530 who brought it up? unsure. but it pops up in my head every now and then and i love it so much

I hope you enjoyed and I'll do my best to update again soon!! Your support, especially comments, but even just the hit count, means the world to me. It makes me really happy to hear people are enjoying this story!! I'm so happy it's as fun for you to read as it is for me to write.

#ducktales #ducktales 2017 #dt17 #ducktales fanfiction #wavey writes #my fanfic #officer cabrera #huey duck #dewey duck #webby vanderquack #della duck #donald duck #gyro gearloose #louie duck #scrooge mcduck

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