#this game was so batshit i remember have a BLAST watching it

[thedragonagebigbang]

Bang Creator Interview: Tumblr: @ciellajess  |  AO3: CiellaJess

The Collaboration period has begun! In these quiet months before works are due, we want to foster a sense of excitement, camaraderie, and celebration among our participants. To that end, all participants were given the option of a formal interview by our mod, Dema, or an informal “ask-game” survey. We hope you enjoy getting to know our phenomenal creators as much as we have!

Interview with CiellaJess

CiellaJess and Dema talk Good Clean Solavellan Fun, favorite romances, and Veilguard plans

Dema: You're my first artist interview, and I am excited to talk shop. What inspires you to make art of Dragon Age?

CiellaJess: I just love the world and the characters. It's one of those things that just gets in my head and I can't let go of it. Every now and then I pull out a game, and get sucked back in all over again.

Dema: When you first played, did you start making DA art right away? Or did it percolate for a while?

CiellaJess: So I started DAO and DA2 multiple times back when they came out. I'm a giant RPG nerd and have a lifelong dragon obsession, but for some reason they didn't grab me and I always moved on to something else. But for some reason, when I tried Inquisition, it was just the right time or place I guess and I was hooked. I started art for that right away. Then I went back and plowed through the other games, no problem. I still mostly do Inquisition art, but I also love drawing my Warden too. Plus all the great companions.

Dema: Would you say you're primarily a character-artist?

CiellaJess: Completely. I wish I were better at landscapes and architecture, the ones in the game are fantastic, but it's never been my strong suit.

Dema: Mmmm yes. I deeply feel that, lol. The eternal struggle 😅What was your first piece of Inquisition art?

CiellaJess: A little two panel comic. I'd just beaten Vinsomer, shortly after the breakup scene with Solas. Dorian and Bull had gone down and it was just my Rogue Inquisitor and Solas managed to eke out a win. I had this little vision in my head of them happy and triumphant and looking at each other. The remembering that they were broken up. I had planned a whole comic, but only got around to the two panels. Them ecstatic and them remembering.

Dema: OOF

CiellaJess: Still probably the formative story for my whole Solavellan romance 😂

Dema: Solavellans sure know how to have fun! I'm trying to think how many times Solas has broken up with my characters....

CiellaJess: It's fun to have your heart broken over and over again, right??

Dema: Like, here I am again, crying into my popcorn. Do you have more than one OC for Inquisition, or are you fully devoted to the Saddest Elf?

CiellaJess: I've started a bunch. I keep trying to do an 'evil' playthrough, with a Trevelyan warrior that wanted to be a Templar. He even features in a fic I'm working on. But usually, some time after I get to Skyhold, I always  wanna go back to my Lavellan. I'm definitely a lil polyamorous when it comes to DA, but I have my favs for sure.

Dema: What are your top 5 romances?

CiellaJess: Solas, Zevran, Alistair, Isabela, Fenris. And Adoribull for bonus points. I've also been playing with the idea of [REDACTED], which is why I'm excited for the fic I got 😁

Dema: I am gunna redact that, but YEAH!!!!! I am excited for you! Related to collaboration: have you done a Big Bang before?

CiellaJess: Nope, this is my first one!

Dema: Welcome! What made you decide to join?

CiellaJess: I've done a few DA fic exchanges and they're always a blast. With DAV coming out, I was on the lookout for something like that. This seemed perfect!

Dema: We have gotten so lucky with the timing. Are you watching all the DAV news closely or are you enforcing some boundaries, haha? I'm personally vacillating back and forth between not wanting to see anything and going absolutely batshit over the tiniest crumb of a detail.

CiellaJess: Constant vigilance! 

Dema: Hahaha! What part has you most excited?

CiellaJess: I love the factions. Especially since it seems like they'll actually be addressed by the companions. Trying to figure out which I'm gonna try first has been hard.

Dema: Are you feeling equally split between them or are you between two or 3?

CiellaJess: Right now I'm leaning towards Shadow Dragons. My initial thought was Veil Jumper, but I tend to do elven rogue, and that felt like doing another version of Bellara. Then I read an interview that mentioned that Solas sees himself in Rook, and now I think that a former elven  slave that's working with the Shadow Dragons to try and rebel against Tevinter felt very much like young Solas. I'm really feeling that dynamic. Of course, that could all go out the window as soon as I get my hands on the game.

Dema: Haha, yeah, but it is so fun to think about!

CiellaJess: Definitely!! And I don't wanna miss out on the others either. Helpfully, my husband will probably go Mortalitassi, so I can watch him play that 😂

Dema: Brilliant strategy. Divide and Conquer. Thank you so much for your time today, it has been great interviewing you! I am excited to see your piece in a few months!CiellaJess: Yay! I'm so excited! Good luck with the rest of them!

[applestorms]

omg thank you for @ ing me!! in response to your question: i absolutely agree. yotsuba light, were he to receive the DN but none of the accompanying memories of being KIRA, would in no way willingly use that power, especially during that arc.

for a much more in depth look at this, i'd highly recommend casuistor's yotsbua light analysis, but tl;dr: a key aspect of light's amnesia during yotsuba is the fact that he doesn't just lose his memories but essentially has them rewritten (check out that post for a full timeline of what light's rewritten memories might look like). essentially, all that yotsuba! light remembers about the KIRA case is being continually and viciously hunted down by L, despite being (in light's mind) completely innocent. yotsuba! light sees himself as the victim of an unfortunate mistake-- but he also deeply aware of just how dangerous of a position that puts him in. it's part of why he pushes the Good Boy, Nice Son angle so fucking hard during yotsuba, because he knows he is being "wrongly" suspected and/or framed, and needs to do everything he can to prove his innocence. his dedication is fully flipped-- KIRA (well L, by proxy) has ruined light's life, and yotsuba! light is fully aware of this, even if KIRA himself cannot allow himself to see it. it's exactly as you say-- yotsuba! light is, "a pawn in someone else's game," (his own, ironically) and he cannot afford to make any questionable moves so long as L is the one watching.

again though, as you said, this is not to say that he wouldn't sympathize with KIRA at all-- we in fact have canon evidence of him doing exactly that (a couple times, in fact):

but i see this more as something akin to how matsuda views KIRA-- seeing the positive effects of KIRA's actions for what they are (lowered crime rate, no wars, etc.), while still condemning the approach itself as murder. light thinks like KIRA because he is KIRA, which is a truth that at you can't entirely avoid, but what's important here is the circumstances surrounding him.

the original context of light finding & using the DN matters a lot for the original creation of KIRA-- it's only through the initial blast of Oh Shit that light's brain starts working overtime to try and justify his actions back at him, to soothe his grief regret so he can still feel like the good, respectable guy everyone says he is-- even after accidentally killing two people. again, taking from casuistor here, but before the god complex was a martyr complex:

light sees KIRA's actions as evil, but a necessary evil, one that he must personally take upon his shoulders to cleanse the world of sin. and he never stops acknowledging that what KIRA is doing is a crime. even when he is being confronted by near in the YB warehouse, minutes before his own death, light fully calls the actions of KIRA criminal:

or in the viz translation:

LIGHT: I knew I was the only one capable of doing it. I knew that killing people was a crime. But that was the only way to correct this world, and one day, people will accept that as being righteous. LIGHT: I had to take the role of KIRA and do it. This was a mission that was entrusted to me. I was chosen to make amends for this rotten world, and to create a truly safe and ideal world. LIGHT: With this notebook... LIGHT: Would anybody else have been able to do this? Come this far? And continue doing it?

so, frankly, the martyr complex never really dies. which makes sense, as light only starts going on about the god shit when ryuk has tramped into his room and demanded entertainment with the underlying threat of light's own life.

all this really only makes it all the more batshit just how quickly light gets back on board with the plan when he does regain his memories in that helicopter. no regrets, no questions-- even pre-yotsuba arc, KIRA's mind has commit to the idea that This Is His Destiny so hard that even months of questioning KIRA's actions cannot stand a chance against his prior dedication. and it truly is all downhill from that point.

@applestorms as it stands you’re probably the most death note-invested person i’ve remotely interacted with so i wanted to ask you. i’ve had this question brewing for a couple of days:

if light was not the original kira, but was given the power of kira at any point during the investigation, would he have accepted the power?

i think we all know that fundamentally, light has the perception of the world that makes him think like kira: the childish sense of justice, much like mikami, the idea that good is forcing criminals to be truly punished for their actions. However, I think that if he were to be given the notebook at any point during the investigation,

(not that it would. there’s no world in which he joins the investigation and is given the notebook, with soichiro being the chief of police, and with him being as outwardly intelligent and potentially even well-known for being the incoming valedictorian at to-oh)

he would refuse to use it, purely based on the fact that he was not originally kira. I think that while he would be intrigued by it, he would ultimately side with L and the police only because kira was not his creation. not his game. at that point, he’s a pawn in someone else’s game, even if he were magnitudes smarter.

honestly, in my own headcanon, regaining ownership of the death note after the yotsuba arc kinda sets that idea in stone for me. Something that most people gloss over when talking about post yotsuba light is the impact that his memory has had. unless the death note magically fixes all of his perceptions, he’s now struggling with the memories that he has of owning the death note and the thought processes he had during yotsuba and what he believed to be before yotsuba, where he’s trying to catch kira.

i believe he’s able to reconcile this issue with the fact that yotsuba light isn’t upon someone else’s game, he’s a pawn in his own game and he trusts his own judgement, which overrides whatever moral code he has against kira’s style.

now i haven’t read the manga and i certainly haven’t analyzed every part of the anime, but i feel like i hit this nail on the head. if light, in some world where he did not pick up the death note at first, were to be given the power of the death note at any time during the investigation, he would ultimately refuse to use it and try to catch kira, purely because of his own hubris.

[cleoselene]

super mega tired because I stayed up all night to hang out all day with my roommate, it’s his birthday and I wanted to order in some lunch for him and chillax and watch some tv so he could have some semblance of a nice celebration before I was too X___x to go on.  Now he’s playing his new video game he bought for himself and winding down from some beer.

I ordered Zaxby’s and that chicken sandwich put Popeye’s to SHAME, I am telling you, holy shit.  DELICIOUS.   We got blasted ass stoned.  He took a quiz where as the Doctor figured out who his best friend (me ofc, I’m one of ‘em)’ Doctor companion was and of course... OF COURSE... I ended up Donna Noble because you know me, right?  No way was my smart ass going to be anyone else BUT Donna Noble AND I can type 95 words a minute when my migraine meds aren’t making me fuck it up.

We finished Tiger Kind and HOOO BOY WHAT A BIG BARRELY OF TEAM NOBODY, EVEN THE PETA INVESTIGATORS AT THE END.  There is literally no one to cheer for here!  I know most of it takes place in Oklahoma but the sheer Florida energy the emanates from it is off the charts. We couldn’t watch it all in one sitting, we watched the first half last week high on weed concentrate and we were like TOO HIGH FOR THIS and this time we just vaped and we were still like TOO HIGH FOR THIS, it was just not too high for this and we were just slack-jaw appalled at like every single solitary person who appeared onscreen, desperately trying to find SOMEONE with a redeeeming quality besides the cats and the cute little wiener dogs and the monkeys and came up EMPTY. Wow.  Just.  WoW.  THEY SHOULD ALL BE LOCKED UP.  TIGER KING 2: LOCK ‘EM ALL UP

THen we got into this stoned conversation about how Tiger King will always be attached to the cultural zeitgeist that is the coronavirus, like, it’ll be that thing, assuming we survive this apocalypse, like, “hey remember coronavirus and how we were all watching that batshit Tiger King thing and even during one of the White House Brifeings a reporter asked Trump if he’s pardon Joe Exotic??  What the fuck people were dying??? That was such a fucking stupid era!!”

And people will not believe it, the story will be so stupid, but we will remember

then we watched some Sopranos adn Dexter and Six Feet Under, normal tv, to feel like normal humans, because what the -fuck-.

migraine is behaving somewhat today but the truth is I have vaped so much weed who would even know!  good day!  good food!  I didn’t leave the house at all!

the Squad was all in, lookin’ hot.  Actually Theron was in major need of a pedicure, some mats between his toes and long nails, but he was an ANGEL for it, unlike Ernie, who always growls at me like he’s going to murder me when I work on his feet and I have to sing “Take Me Out to the Ball Game” “Go Cubs Go” to him to pacify him.  Theron is PERFECT.

Teeters remains a bizarre, poorly rendered medieval creature version of a dog.

[sunkissedpages]

Just Another Thursday Night || Tom Holland x Reader

For my valentine @technicolor-lightning​!! this is probably the cheesiest thing I’ve ever written so buckle up lol. it’s been so great getting to know you over the past few weeks, love!! and now I can finally follow you ah!! happy valentine’s day, I hope you like it!!

also!! thank you so much @dtftomholland and @thazypangolin for hosting and putting so much hard work into this I had an absolute blast with it!!

Warnings: swearing

Word Count: 1.6k

As far as commercial holidays went, Valentine’s Day was your least favorite. Corporate America always goes batshit crazy when it comes to profiting off of people’s affection, but they took Valentine’s day to a whole different level and it made your skin crawl. Of course, maybe your bitterness was tied to the fact that you’d only ever had one nice Valentine’s Day in your entire life, but that was only a theory.

You and your roommate Tom planned to spend Valentine’s Day exactly as you always did. You’d order from three different takeout restaurants: Cuban, Italian, and Chinese and spend the entire night watching bad game shows. It’s what you had done for the past three years, save the year Tom had a girlfriend (whom you despised) and had taken her out to dinner instead. You still gave him shit for dating a pathological liar, even a year and half later.

Work had dragged on, but at least you were able to lock up early since patrons had stopped coming in over an hour ago. No one needed to be in a bookstore on the evening of Valentine’s Day, they all had better things to do- or better people to do.

It was raining, of course, and you’d left your umbrella at home. Tom had texted you a picture of it sitting by the door where you’d left it and offered to bring it to you at work, but you knew he was busy so you said you’d be fine without it. You regretted not taking him up on his offer now that you were pushing your way through the rush hour crowd holding your bag over your head trying to stay somewhat dry without much success.

You must’ve made your way around ten couples who were kissing out on the sidewalk. It was hard not to roll your eyes at them. To them the rain was romantic. Apparently they weren’t worried about catching bronchitis.

You were thankful for the blast of warm air that hit you the second you stepped inside your apartment building. It was already an old building when you’d moved in with Tom, but over the years it had really started to fall apart. There were more leaks in the ceilings, which made rainy days like today all the more difficult, the wood floors creaked, and the hot water only worked sometimes, but the rent was fantastic for the location and you couldn’t dream of living anywhere else. The elevator had been out of order for months, but you still weren’t used to taking the stairs all the way up to the sixth floor. You felt like you were dying every time.

“How was work?” Tom asked as soon as he heard you come through the door, completely soaked head to toe. He looked up from his laptop and pressed his lips together in an attempt to suppress his laughter upon seeing your appearance.

You narrowed your eyes at him. “We sold thirteen copies of Romeo & Juliet today.” Tom cringed. “All these boys think they’re so original by getting their lit major girlfriends fucking Romeo & Juliet for Valentine’s Day.” You went on and Tom closed his laptop to show he was listening. “I mean at first I felt kind of bad for them because they don’t know any better so I’d suggest Pride and Prejudice if they wanted something that was still well-known, but also romantic to be a little more original or Mansfield Park if they wanted to seem like they did research or put some actual fucking thought into it, but they always took the easy way out.” You hadn’t realized you felt so passionately about this until now.

“Anyone buy Alex, Approximately?” he asked and you immediately smiled. You always did when he brought up your favorite book.

You still remembered the first time you read it. It’d been a rainy night, much like tonight and you’d brought it home from work. It’d been on your to-read list for a while and you were finally able to get to it.

You’d had plans to go out with Tom and friends, but the weather had turned the five minute walk to the bar into a nightmare so the two of you bailed and spent a night in instead. Tom was curled up on the couch with his script and you with your book. Every time you laughed or smiled at a part Tom would stop working and ask you about it. You’d read the part out loud to him and he’d listen intently, urging you to go on when you’d finished, but you just laughed and told him to get back to work, unaware of his gaze that lingered on you as you got lost in the words you were reading.

“No,” you sighed, kicking your shoes off at the door where they could dry. “No one has good taste apparently.”

He smiled softly. “You still wanna watch game shows tonight?”

“Of course! It’s valentine’s day isn’t it?”

“You shower, I’ll order the food?” he suggested.

“Perfect.”

By some miracle the water warmed almost instantly and you were able to take a scalding shower. You let the water nearly burn your skin as the chill slowly eased from your bones. After your shower you changed into some sweats. Even though it was valentine’s day it wasn’t like you were trying to impress anyone.

Tom was set up on the floor of the living room with one out of three orders of food already on the coffee table. Family Feud was playing in the background. You couldn’t wait to spend the night lounging around and stuffing your face with your favorite person.

You and Tom both waited around until the rest of the food showed up, shouting answers out at the tv and yelling at the contestants when they got the question wrong.

The rest of the food arrived in under and hour and Tom set everything up while you were tasked with grabbing drinks from the fridge.

“There are some raspberries in there too,” Tom called from the living room.

“What?” you shouted back, not completely sure if you’d heard him right.

“I picked up some raspberries from the store, they’re your favorite, right?”

“Yeah, they are,” you replied softly, warmth filling your chest as you looked at the rosy berries in front of you. “You didn’t have to do that, Tom,” you sighed as you brought everything back to the living room.

“I know, but it’s valentine’s day, I wanted to do something nice.”

“But I didn’t get anything for you,” you whined.

He chuckled. “They’re just raspberries, y/n.”

You watched countless episodes of Family Feud, Jeopardy, and Are You Smarter than a 5th Grader until the sound of a buzzer made you both cringe, your brains hurt from all the trivia, and the raspberries in the container dwindled to almost none.

“I think I won,” Tom said at the end of the night with a yawn, stretching dramatically.

You shook your head. “No way, I got seventy points and you only got sixty three.”

“We said we weren’t keeping count this year!” he protested.

“Technically we didn’t. It wasn’t official!” He gave you a look. “You know I can’t help myself!”

“Uh huh, whatever,” he pouted. “I get you raspberries and this is how you treat me?”

“Come on, Tom, don’t be a sore loser!” He stuck his tongue out at you in defiance. “Real mature,” you laughed, stifling a yawn. “Hey, but thanks for spending valentine’s day with me,” you said genuinely. “It doesn’t feel so lonely when I’m with you.”

“Of course, it’s tradition,” he shrugged as he started putting pillows back on the couch.

“I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

“I would,” Tom said and you froze, heart sinking. Of course Tom would want to spend valentine’s day with a romantic interest, who wouldn’t? But you and Tom had a good thing going, or so you’d thought.

“Oh,” was all you said as you helped him straighten up.

“Wait, no that’s not what I meant- shit.”

“It’s okay, Tom, you don’t have to explain-”

“No hold on,” he said and disappeared into another room returning only seconds later with something behind his back. “So I might have gotten you something else.”

“Tom! Why didn’t you tell me we were doing gifts?” you asked when he handed you a small wrapped package.

“Just open it.” You tore into the paper to reveal a copy of We Were Liars. It was a book you already owned and had read several times. It was one of your favorites. You looked up at Tom in confusion. “Open it.”

You flipped it open to reveal scribbles on the inside cover. “It’s signed?” you asked in disbelief, already smiling.

“That’s not all, read it,” he urged.

Y/n, Tom is too much of a bitch to tell you himself, so he asked me to send this message along to you: He’s completely head over heels for you, girl. Has been for a while. Be his valentine? - E. Lockhart

You looked back up at him, beaming. He was biting his thumbnail nervously, waiting for your response.

“Are those good tears or bad tears?” he asked.

You hadn’t even realized you were crying. “This is the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me.”

“So...is that a yes?”

“Yes, it’s a yes!” you cried, flinging your arms around him to embrace him.

He hugged you tightly, then leaned back to kiss you tenderly, taking your face in his hands and wiping the remaining tears away with his thumbs.

“Happy valentine’s day, love,” he whispered.

“Happy valentine’s day, Tom.”

“Same time next year?”

Forever Tags: @mischiefmanaged49 @bookingbee @cloverrover @perhaps-he-schnapped @awkwardfangirl2014 @the-queen-procrastinator @tastingthestarz @sleepybesson @everythingbooknerd @sunshine96love @bitchymathematician @livingincompletesilence @melbookstrash @swim-deep-or-die (some of you guys I couldn’t tell if you wanted to be on my permanent taglist or the woko taglist so if you want me to switch you over lmk)

Send me an ask to be added/dropped from a taglist

[wardencommanderrodimiss]

baratrongirl replied to your post “Really do not understand why GameFreak took out the Hall of Fame...”

I'd be interested to hear what you don't like about Sword/Shield. For me, it's quite the opposite. I played the hell out of the 3rd and 4th Gens, then struggled to finish White and didn't buy White 2. Didn't finish SoulSilver, or whichever of X or Y I got, and became completely bored about 10 hours into Alpha Sapphire despite being all motivated to play the game with my original Sapphire team only now I know what I'm doing. Didn't even BUY Sun/Moon.

Then I hung out with my Pokemon friends over Sword/Shield launch weekend, watched them playing on the TV, and had to immediately borrow a spare Switch so I could play too. By the end of the weekend I'd bought the Switch and paid to download my own copy of Shield. I have a few issues with it, mostly relating to the lack of clothing options for male characters, but otherwise I'm finding it the blast of fresh air that I needed to get back into the Pokemon games.

I’ve heard a lot of people say something similar, that SwSh was a nice upgrade from the past couple gens. I started slipping around XY - didn’t wanna buy a 3DS and didn’t until Omega Ruby came out, since Ruby was the first one I’d played - and after I finished the Team Flare plot of X I just gave up for three years and only last year finished the 8th gym and the league. I honestly don’t remember much of playing OR. I think it was a weird kind of frantic nostalgia-fueled haze but I genuinely cannot comment on what I liked about that game. It’s a blank in my memory. Really enjoyed Sun and Moon, like Sword but get bummed the longer I think about it. But I did buy it because I did see a ton of people saying it was a change they were enjoying, quality-of-life upgrades, fun new features, etc. Different strokes and all.

My biggest gripe on Sword is that the world feels pretty empty. Besides the Wild Area, and its few secluded corners, though it’s really a straightforward place, there’s nothing to explore. The plot grabs you by the hand and pulls you to every location. There’s nothing off-the-way that you don’t go to for the main plot. There’s nothing like Kanto’s Power Plant, or Alola’s Power Plant - which I didn’t even realize was there on my first pass through, and then I was like “hey what’s this little place, OH MY GOD WHAT THERE’S MORE STUFF HERE.” The region is a linear loop. There’s no weird little caves that aren’t plot relevant that you get scrambled up in. There’s nowhere that’s locked until you beat the League, like the other half of Poni Island or those last upper bits in Unova or the Battle Frontier in Sinnoh. I had canvassed the Wild Area for everything by the time I went to the final tournament. There’s nowhere else to go. Sure I went back through the Wild Area to catch more stuff to fill out my Pokedex, but new places? Nothing. There’s nowhere to go back to once you can cross water except the little lake by the professor’s house. Not like in Sun/Moon where there’s bits on prior islands to go back to with Lapras. That cave underneath the starting island to go check out I’m thinking of. Galar is a pretty bare-bones region and the Wild Area doesn’t fully compensate.

Which ties to my other biggest gripe, which is, there are three legendary Pokemon in the game and one of them is the opposite version’s exclusive that you can’t get. Two legendary Pokemon! Two legendary Pokemon you can catch! And you catch them both in the course of the plot! There’s nothing like the Regi trio hidden by batshit puzzles, or Cobalion/Terrakion/Virizion tucked in out-of-the-way corners. No wandering Lati@s or beast trio. No Tapus or anything. You can catch two legendary Pokemon.

I think we really peaked back in Gen 3 with its visual Braille puzzles and Gen 4 with whatever the everloving fuck the Turnback Cave was on about. The weird locations that hurt your brain. I miss those. I miss the tricky caves you get lost in and spend time figuring it out. Galar didn’t have caves. The mines were basically a straight shot, yknow? When I’d like to go deeper and have more to explore instead of feeling like I’m taking a walking tour of the whole region.

And the DLC looks like it’ll deal at least with that point with more legendaries, which really grinds my gears. In all the discourse about whether or not the DLC is good or bad or neutral, whether the price of video games has needed to go up or the DLC is cheaper than a third version but some people wait for the third version, which I didn’t seek out said discourse but saw pass me by on Twitter, I saw no one mention that we’re paying to get more than two legendary Pokémon and I felt like I was losing my mind for a little while there. I feel like I’m paying extra for something that’s been in every game since the beginning of time, that being more than two legendary Pokémon that I can catch.

And my lesser little gripes: level balance of the game felt a little wonky with the wild Pokemon toward the end higher leveled than all the trainers except Leon, and the always-on exp share made it worse because when I dragged out the plot by catching everything in the Wild Area, my team got way overleveled for the back half of the game and I could curbstomp everyone that passed me. Team Yell were an egregious roadblock and while Pokemon has always had those, the prominence of Team Yell was exasperating. I prefer environmental roadblocks, like water and back when we used to have other HMs, those feel a little better than two dudes standing in the middle of a wide road.

And why, oh WHY, did GameFreak downgrade after XY and only have fitting rooms in boutiques instead of also in Pokemon Centers? I don’t want to fly to another town to change my clothes! Not every town has a clothes shop but everywhere has a Pokemon Center! I was crusading on this point through Sun/Moon and I will not be stopped until GameFreak puts changing rooms back in Pokemon Centers! (They will probably never do that but I refuse to stop. Forget Dexit; this is the real issue of our time.)

I didn’t mind the limited Pokémon at release because I never transfer my teams thru the games anyway - I’m a sentimental anxious idiot afraid of decisions and commitment and I can’t commit to the one-way transfers to move my teams up to new games. And that plus the Wild Area having trade-evolution Pokemon walking around made me feel like completing my pokedex was actually attainable. So I did!

I don’t hate the game, but I am disappointed by it. I’ve never been a Battle Tower or shiny-hunting person, but I’ve ended up doing those because I don’t know what else to do.

So that’s my opinion on why SwSh has bummed me out more as time goes on, since you were curious.

(Joker from Mass Effect 2 when you ask him for gossip about your teammates voice: “But that’s just my opinion, no need to go spreading it around.” ;) I’ll gladly chat with friends but the poke-discourse got too intense on twitter and I am not inviting that kind of bad energy into our lives. None of us deserve that.)

I’ve still got a lot of endgame stuff for Sun and Moon, UB hunting and I haven’t made it to the Battle Tree yet because my Moon team is getting its ass kicked by everything because I turned the exp share off and overcompensated in the wrong direction and am chronically underleveled. There’s a certain charm for me in being underleveled because I used to have endless patience to overlevel my team to extremes because my childhood anxiety was something like “if I die in the game I die in real life???” and I was terrified of losing and now I’m like “blacks out twice in a row in Moon as I go toward the postgame stuff yolo”. So when I feel like playing Pokemon I’ll probably spend more time in Alola, when I’m not trying to hatch that damn shiny Rookidee because I accidentally committed to that.

[snarky-badger]

Hello, i love your work! so may i resquest a prompt with a badass/sarcastic girlfriend for eddie, like Something happen to us and eddie and venom to protect her but she kick some ass too and their shook because they want to protect her but she protect them from someone i dunno i hope that give you a better idea than mine !

This… didn’t come out the way I wanted. I rewrote it twice. Still not totally happy with it, but I’m worried I’ll ruin it if I tweak it any more.

Since Youtube doesn’t like links, copy/paste this into your browser to hear the music that inspired the fight scene: www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ac4J9344s2s (It’s ‘I Just Died In Your Arms Tonight’ by Hidden Citizens)

You grinned as you stepped out of your office building and spotted Eddie leaning against a street light. He jerked as it poked, his gaze rising from his phone, a warm smile spreading over his lips when he spotted you.

Smiling, you wove through the mass of people, heels clacking on the pavement as you made your way over to him. “Hey, you! I wasn’t expecting to see you here.”

Steel blue eyes flickered a little as a white shadow flit across them before Eddie’s smile stretched into a grin. “Thought we’d pick you up for an early supper,” he said, reaching out to take your messenger bag from your shoulder.

“Aw, you’re sweet.” You rose up on your tiptoes to kiss him, slipping a hand in under his jacket to touch his ribs, chuckling when you felt a symbiote tendril curl around your fingers and squeeze. “Lemme guess, someone’s hungry?”

“When is he not hungry?” Eddie chuckled. You snickered at the thin black tendril that rose up from his jacket collar to flick at his left ear. “Vee - not in public!”

A soft laugh left you as you pulled away. “Hi Venom. Steak or Sushi?”

“Steak,” growled out of Eddie’s throat, the man coughing a little once the alien had relinquished control of his voice.

“Steak it is,” you chuckled, smiling again when Eddie hefted your bag onto his shoulder before taking your left hand in his, lacing his fingers with yours. “So, what’d you do all day? Eat anyone interesting?”

A laugh left him. “Nothing nearly that exciting. Just lots of research for the next article the editor tossed at me. A pharmaceutical group recently upped the price of some cancer drugs by a thousand percent.”

“Ugh. Gross.”

“Yeah. Assholes. And you?”

“Oh, yes, because I lead a glamorous life as a Human Resources lackey,” you snarked, rolling your eyes. “The new program they installed is shit, to be honest. It keeps crashing and causing problems.”

“So they fixed it until it broke?”

“Yup. And it’s breaking in an fantastic way. Half of the people I talked to today haven’t been paid in three months, others got seven times their bi-weekly pay in one lump sum, and three had funds taken out of their accounts… which, technically, should be impossible, but the new program is apparently a ‘huge success’.”

“Bureaucracy at it’s finest,” he muttered with a roll of his eyes, and you chuckled as you nodded your agreement. “Well, we’re here to distract you! Good food and then a quick wardrobe change at the apartment and we’ll head down to the fair that just got set up.”

“Oooh, yay! Dibs on the shooting games! I need to shoot something.”

Eddie laughed at your enthusiasm, hand releasing yours so he could relocate his arm around your shoulders, pulling you into his body for a hug. “Deal.”

“Target acquired!”

“Wha–”

You and Eddie both turned towards the shout. You caught a glimpse of a trio of heavily armed people standing in the middle of the intersection before the one on the left rose their arms, silver gauntlets on their wrists glowing a little before noise, a shrieking, screaming, wall of sound hit you.

You dropped with a cry, hands clamping over your ears. The sound, horrible, high pitched, making your bones vibrate uncomfortably as it cut through your skull. People all around you clutched at their heads, some falling, some crawling for safety - though there was none to be found.

All the windows around shattered. Cars, buildings, store fronts, all exploded, sending glass flying everywhere, pelting everyone on the street and sidewalks with shrapnel.

Eddie howled in pain next to you, dropping to the ground, writhing. Blackness boiled around him as Venom uncoiled, the symbiote convulsing as the high pitched sound cut through it. Venom’s own scream, feral, raw, rose in counterpoint to Eddie’s and you could only watch, tears streaming down your face, as the ones you cared about thrashed in agony on the pavement.

The silence that followed that sonic barrage was complete and still, and you spent a moment trying to remember how to move, muscles still vibrating from the blast. Finally, you managed to shakily crawl over to Eddie, who was breathing shallowly, Venom a weakly twitching puddle beneath him.

“E-Eddie?” You saw the three start to approach out of the corner of your eye and shook your boyfriend, voice sounding distant and tinny to your no doubt damaged hearing. “Eddie!”

All around, people were scattering, running, a group nearly stampeding over you as they bolted from the trio that were slowly walking down the street, bits of broken glass crunching under their boots as they approached.

Hands shaking, you stumbled to your feet, one shoe missing. You kicked off the other pump, glass easily cutting through your pantyhose covered feet as you grabbed Eddie under the shoulders and started dragging him under an parked SUV and out of sight

The panicking group of people around you helped to hide your motions, enough that the attackers paused when they reached the spot where Eddie had fallen. You were shaking, laying flat on the dirty street under the SUV, Eddie on his back next to you, half-conscious.

“Can’t have gotten far,” one of the attackers growled, and you watched armored boots move around the side of the SUV you were hiding under. “Alien should be out of commission from that blast.”

“Thought you said it’d take him out with one blast! Where’d he go?”

“Look, I don’t know everything okay? Just what was in the portfolio. Weakness to sound and fire, that’s all it said.”

“Shouldn’t have taken this job, Mark. It stinks.”

A new voice growled out: “Fuck that. For five million dollars I’d take out my own grandmother.”

“That’s cuz you’re batshit insane, Jonah.”

You chewed on your lip, eyeing Eddie where he lay beside you as the obsidian puddle that was Venom slowly reformed around him. He moaned, eyelids fluttering, and you slapped a hand over his mouth to silence him, attention going back to watching the three sets of boots mill around as they started searching the street.

It wouldn’t be long before they spotted you. You frowned, your free hand curling into a fist, hating the lack of options.

Eddie suddenly jerked awake next to you, and you shifted your hand from his mouth to his chest, pushing him back down.

“Shh,” you hissed, meeting his gaze before glancing to the nearest set of armored boots.

He tensed, but stayed silent, tilting his head back to watch as the man stomped past the SUV, moving to investigate an alley. “When we say ‘run’,” Eddie rumbled into your ear, his voice a low growl of mixed human and alien. “Run.”

You nodded, mutely. Watched as blackness rose to cover him, Venom’s face forming close to yours, pale, opal sheened, eyes and a mouth with too many fangs settling into place.

“READY MORSEL?”

“Yeah.”

“GO.”

You scrambled out from under the SUV at the same time that Venom lifted it off it’s wheels, bolting for the shelter of a parked bus on the other side of the street. There was an unearthly roar of anger, followed by yells and screams from ‘Mark’ and ‘Jonah’, and a crunch of a car being thrown.

Glass sunk into the soles of your feet as you jumped and slid across the hood of a car in the middle of the street, the vehicle abandoned by it’s owners. You landed on the opposite side, hunkering down. Blew a loose strand of your hair out of your eyes as you peeked over the hood, watching as Venom closed a taloned hand around one of the attacker’s throats and lifted him off his feet.

A roar of pain left him seconds later as a flash grenade detonated at his feet, bits of the symbiote flaring away a little before reforming. Venom turned, and threw the man in his grasp at the one who had thrown the grenade, the two males crashing to the ground in a tangle of limbs.

Fire filled the street as the third attacker ran into the thick of things, and you winced at Venom’s shriek as flames licked at his body, bits of his symbiote form flaking off, like ashes. He leapt out range, used a tendril to rip a newspaper box off it’s moorings, then threw it.

When things started to get too close for comfort, you sucked in a breath and darted away from the car, ignoring the sharp pains cutting into your feet as you ran for the safety of an alleyway a block away.

Took cover behind a dumpster, crouching there, closing your eyes when another blast of sound made the fillings in your teeth vibrate.

You hoped Venom could handle himself. Technically, you could have done something, but fear of reprisal held you back. You didn’t think the repercussions would come from Eddie or Venom. No, you were worried about bigger things - like your life.

When you’d turned thirteen, you’d developed the ability to move things with a thought. Your parents had been horrified. Had instilled in you the knowledge that if you ever let anyone know what you could do, that you’d be taken away. That you couldn’t under any circumstances, use your powers, no matter what. So you’d kept what you could do a secret throughout high school, and then college, and then your adult life.

Now, with the Mutant Registration Act in full swing, you feared for your life. You knew what humans did to mutants: had seen far too many beatings and anti-mutant protests and hatred. The ‘Friends of Humanity’ patrolled the streets like a wave of physical hatred.

Fear kept you from trusting anyone. Fear kept you restrained.

So, you huddled, hiding, as the sounds of the battle got louder. People screamed and sobbed as Venom and the Trio fought, stragglers darting around, some stupidly taking photos with their phones while others right ran for their lives.

With every scream of the sonics, with every whoosh of fire and loud explosion of grenades, with every roar and scream of pain from Venom, you jerked as if physically hit. Guilt knawed at you, and you clenched your eyes shut, the heels of your hands pressing into your temple.

Suddenly, a massive explosion rocked the ground, sending you to your knees in the grime. Bits of buildings, bricks and mortar, clattered to around you, and you curled over, hands rising to protect your head as another series of booms and bangs rattled everything. It sounded like the end of the world, like a nuclear bomb going off.

People screamed again, cars lifting off their tires, some flipping onto their sides. More sound shook the air, drowning out your own shriek of fear as everything went to hell around you. The ground rose, then slammed back down, and you cried out again as you landed hard on your chest, the breath whooshing out of you.

Distantly, as silence and stillness finally returned, you heard the sounds of triumphant whooping.

“HAH! Got ‘im! Told you land-mining the street ahead of time was worth it!”

Panting, shaking, you pushed yourself to your hands and knees, palms bloodied from scraping on the concrete. Your pant were torn at the knees, covered in grime, and you stiffly shucked out of your blazer, loosening the top three buttons of your blouse as you tried to level out your panicked breathing.

Numb, ears ringing, you stumbled to your feet, then staggered towards the street, side stepping around bits of debris. The street was decimated. Huge holes lined either side of the road, bits of concrete and asphalt peppered the ground, along with more glass. Some stores looked like they’d imploded, others were missing completely. A building across the way was missing the whole front of it - it had simply caved in. Some cars had been flattened by debris, one was one fire, and a few were blaring their alarms.

Shivering, you braced yourself against a still standing wall, and peered around it. The trio were standing in around a figure on the ground, and your heart sank when you realized that it was Eddie, his left leg broken, his right arm bent at an unnatural angle. Venom was pooled under him, trembling, and you growled when one of the thugs aimed a flamethrower at the leading edge of the symbiote and literally burnt it off with a burst of fire.

Your life, or the life of the man (and symbiote) that you loved?

Your hands curled into fists at your sides, nails cutting into your palms as your knuckles went white.

You didn’t have the luxury of fear anymore.

Eddie groaned, pain, sharp and white hot, bombarding him. One leg was definitely fucked up, and one of his arms was just a blur of agony. Things weren’t too good with his head either, he had trouble focusing his eyes, and his thoughts seemed decidedly… slippery.

The place where Venom usually lived in his brain was frighteningly quiet, and he frowned, tasting blood as he licked his lips, voice croaking out. “V-Venom?”

A voice snorted laughter at him. “Sorry, asshole. Your alien buddy is down for the count.”

Another chuckled. “Easiest five mil I ever made.”

He groaned again, trying to sit up, good arm shaking as he tried to heft himself up, only to cry out when the butt of a gun smacked into his forehead. Stars and blackness exploded across his vision, consciousness wavering, and Eddie felt hands grab him, felt new pain as he was dragged down the street. His still working hand slid through a familiar viscous mass, and he curled his fingers into the symbiote, slurring Venom’s name again.

“Wait. What the fuck is that?”

“What the fuck is what?”

Dimly, Eddie felt it. The ground, vibrating, like an earthquake, but more drawn out. As if a train was rumbling by. He rolled his head on his shoulders, blinking through the blood in his eyes, and joined his three attackers in trying to figure out what was going on.

He caught sight of you before they did. Blinked again, trying to focus, as you kept walking towards them, slowly, steadily. Your business outfit was torn, blood, dust, dirt and grime marring your clothes, feet bloodied from walking on bits of glass and debris.

“Who’s that?”

“Who the fuck cares? She’s a witness. Fry her.”

Eddie thrashed, trying to get loose. Howled when the one on the left returned the attempt with a kick to his head. His skull rebounded against some debris, vision going black, and he groaned, curling into himself, good hand rising to cover the bleeding gash he’d just gained.

“Hey there, sweet thing,” the one with the flamethrower leered as he stepped forward. “You look a little hot!”

“No!” Eddie screamed as fire exploded from the odd gun the thug was holding, washing forward like a tsunami. Saw it engulf you, the flames hot enough to made the paint on nearby cars turn black from the heat and start to peel. He fought, screaming obscenities, lashing out with his good leg and making contact.

The goon with the sonic gauntlets went down with a curse when his knee was kicked in, landing on Eddie with the intention of beating him senseless. Rage took over as Eddie fought back, grappling, beating on the other man with his good fist, until one of the others still standing kicked his broken leg right where it had snapped in half.

His vision went black from pain. Heaving, Eddie curled into himself, receiving a knee to the ribs as the thug he’d kicked gave him a final hit before staggering to his feet again.

He heard a curse of surprise, heard more footsteps. Managed to crack an eye open in time to see the trio start to back away. Frowning, he tilted his head back as far as he could, blinking through his swollen eyes in shock.

You were standing in the center of a circular unburnt patch, the only signs that fire had been involved the chaos around you, burnt cars, smouldering asphalt that was partially melted from the heat.

Eyes narrowed, you stepped forward, ignoring the sizzling stench of your skin burning as you walked across hot concrete. Everything vibrated around you as your powers uncurled from you in waves, making bits of debris rattle on the ground.

Eddie blinked up at you as you reached him, pausing to look down at him with glowing eyes. “B-Babe?” he croaked, shivering when the glow faded a little, as you gave him what you hoped was a reassuring smile before raising your gaze back to the Trio, breathing deep as you stepped in front of Eddie’s crumpled form.

The Trio didn’t bother with any quips or conversation. Merely opened fire, flames and the scream of sonics filling the air.

Eddie grimaced, bracing himself for more pain, eyes widening when you rose a hand to the side, fingers curling a little. A heavily damaged car rose off it’s tires and flew between you and the oncoming attacks. Metal groaned, the frame buckling inwards, as it acted like a barrier, absorbing fire and the sonic barrage. 

You waited for a lull in the attacks before making a shoving motion, sending the car flying forwards. It cartwheeled through the street, sending the Trio diving for cover. You sent an SUV and a pickup truck after it, aiming to crush the opposition outright, eyes narrowing as you reached down, into the ground.

More concrete buckled, ripping free, chunks rising into the air as you took hold of them. Another thought had slivers of glass gathering together into sharpened spikes, your makeshift weapons floating in the air around you, held aloft by your thoughts alone.

Only two of the attackers rose out from the destruction from the vehicles, and Eddie propped himself up on his good arm as you took aim, sending a chunk of concrete after the one with the flamethrower and three spikes after the one with the sonic gauntlets.

Fire was useless against rock. The concrete flew through the wave of flames aimed at it and hit the man right in the chest. He died seconds later when a razor sharp spike of glass sunk into his face.

The other man had thrown himself to the side, rolling out of the way of the spikes you’d sent after him, and Eddie watched as you made a gesture, one of the other chunks of concrete floating nearby shooting forward. It forced the thug to abandon his hiding spot as the heavy chunk flattened the small Mazda he’d been hunkering behind.

He darted across the street, arms raised, more sonics screaming out from those odd gauntlets he wore. You mentally wrenched a nearby car door off it’s hinges, seeing the metal buckle as you used it as a shield. The second the sound stopped, you sent half a dozen spikes at him; five at chest level, one at his feet.

He deflected five, but not the sixth that sunk into his right foot, pinning him to the ground. Finally still long enough for you to focus on him, you mentally reached out and snapped his neck, his head spinning all the way around before he dropped, dead, to the ground.

“That’s quite enough of that.”

Eddie grimaced as he jerked his head to the side, following your startled gaze as the two of you stared at the third goon, and you grit your teeth when the man rose his arms, the pair of sonic gauntlets he wore glinting in the light before he activated them.

Being hit point blank was like having a bomb go off in your head. You screamed, dropping to the ground, your telekinetic hold on the concrete chunks and shards of glass failing as the shriek of sound cut through your brain. Eddie convulsed next to you, the symbiote boiling and undulating in agony.

Panic took over, and you lashed out.

Everything exploded.

The thug died on impact as the blast picked him up and sent him flying across the street to impact with a building wall with bone breaking force. Recurrent waves of power rolled off of you, over and over, concrete buckling, cars being sent flying, buildings cracking on their foundations. Garbage and debris swirled around, forming an impassable barrier.

Eddie groaned, reaching out, fingers touching your arm before curling around your wrist. Everything beyond a ten foot radius around the two of you was falling apart under a constant barrage of unfocused power, the ground cracking and splitting under the stress. “Babe. Babe, s’okay. S’over! Babe!”

The shout, along with the grip on your wrist, jolted you, eyes snapping open, blinking a few times before you focused on Eddie’s bloodied face.

As soon as your mind calmed, everything settled. Cars slammed to the ground, debris dropping all around you like rain. You gasped, breath hitching in your throat as tears gathered in your eyes. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry! I didn’t– I lost control–”

“It’s okay,” Eddie rasped, forcing a smile when you crawled over to him and leaned down to press your forehead to his. “You kick some serious ass when you’re pissed.”

A watery laugh left you, and you kissed him, gently. “You look like shit.”

“Feel like shit, too.” A grunt left him as he forced himself to sit up, and you frowned as you helped him, your gaze landing on the mass of black, viscous, symbiote under him. “Ahhh shit. Ribs.”

“Venom– I-Is he?”

“No clue. Can’t feel him.” He reached down into the obsidian puddle under him, frowning as he sank his fingers into the mass. Felt it vibrate a little against his skin, and look up at you with a crooked smile when the symbiote slowly, painfully slowly, sunk into his skin. “Down but not out.”

You let out a sigh of relief. “Good.”

Sirens caught both of your attentions, and you frowned as police, fire trucks and ambulances appeared at the intersection. People appeared from everywhere, sticking their heads out of stores and alleys and doorways before mobbing the response teams.

You looked away and refocused on Eddie, who was pale under the patina of dirt and blood. Sighing, you dropped down to sit next to him, leaning your head against his when he slumped against you. “Don’t think Vee’s going to appreciate hospital food though.”

He managed a tired, weak, huff of laughter. “That’s because it’s not real food.”

A smile tugged at your lips for a moment before fading. “Think I’ll get arrested?”

“Don’t know. Though if anyone connects me with Venom, I might be joining you.”

“Shit.”

“Yup.”

“I’m sorry… for not telling you,” you murmured as the throng of police and EMTs neared the two of you. “I should have. You trusted me, and I was too much of a coward to reciprocate.”

His good hand sought out yours and you shivered when his fingers curled around yours tightly. “S’okay. Promise. It’s okay.”

“No, it’s not.”

“Overruled.”

A tired laugh left you. “You’ve been watching too many court dramas again.”

“Vee’s fault.”

“Of course it is.”

[admittedlynotspartacus]

“Game of Thrones” Season VIII: Episode 3 - Hello Darkness, My Old Friend

All right people - so some shit went down, and between Avengers: Endgame and this, I imagine the entire nerd populace of the world is going to be comatose this week. You have permission to take a break from twerking for a moment, because damn. But first, let’s unpack.

WARNING: SPOILERS for the latest episode. So if you don’t know who dies, who fucks who, and how to turn the brightness up on your TV high enough, turn back now.

So we start out like La La Land with like a long tracking shot checking in on a bunch of people. We’ve got Sam bopping around all -

Before he passes it off to P-Dinky, who’s like -

While Lady Sophia Grace is just like -

Except it’s all just like... morbidly depressing. And Bran is there.

So yeah Bran is off to the godswood where I’m sure he’s going to do something very very important, while everyone else is chilling on the battlements. We’ve got Sansa.

And Barack.

And Gendry.

Anyway, the horses are starting to get kinda impatient. And like oh wow Ghost is here!

When suddenly we start pulling in on the darkness opposite our heroes. And I’m like-

But we don’t get any zombies yet because first who should come clomp clomping in but Big Red herself, riding solo.

And people she’s got a real special pre-game ritual she wants to share when she goes full Oprah like, “YOU GET A FIRE SWORD! AND YOU GET A FIRE SWORD! AND YOU GET A FIRE SWORD!”

So Big Red is strutting into Winterfell all -

And Davos is like, “Um, can we talk about Baby Girl Dragonface?” And Big Red is just like -

And anyway there’s no time, because the Dothraki are charging. We’ve got Jorah, we’ve got fire catapults, we’ve got Ghost all -

And it’s really fucking fierce but they’re also running into the darkness and I’m like -

Well, it turns out they couldn’t see what the fuck they were headed toward either because all of a sudden they’re like -

And all the fires just go -

Everybody’s like -

Anyway, D-Baby and J-Snow are doing what they do best and being boring on a cliff somewhere. And J-Snow’s all, “Blah blah blah gotta wait for the Night Queen.” But D-Baby’s like, “Those are my boys.”

And like, thank God because the zombies. Are. Here. So they’re rushing our Unsullied bros all -

And people are just getting fucking mauled. Except like, Brienne. And Jaime. And Tormund. And Pod. And Gendry. And Sam. But like everyone who we don’t know? They’re getting mauled. Until Deus Ex D-Baby swoops in once again all -

And like, thank God her indiscriminate fire blasting doesn’t wind up killing any of our heroes, because like. That would be crazy. 

Joining the derby is J-Snow, who is suddenly a whiz at flying a dragon thanks to his Impromptu Booty Call Lesson. And he sees the Frosty Posse (copyright John Way) literally CHILLING at the edge of the woods and is like -

Until the Posse’s like -

Thereby creating worse whiteout conditions than when I was driving home from my grandma’s two Christmases ago. AND THAT SHIT WAS BAD! So like all the good guys and the zombies are like -

But the snow’s like -

And I’m like -

Except That One Night’s Watch Guy died. That was sad.

At this point, Sansa’s like, “I’ma go see how things are down in the crypt.” But she’s greeted by like the shadiest looks ever, to which she’s just like -

And GURL. Things are not going well upstairs, because everyone has quickly gone from this -

to this -

While D-Baby and J-Snow are flying around like Diana Ross in the blizzard scene from The Wiz. SIDEBAR: THERE IS NO GIF OF THAT BUT YOU TRULY MUST LOOK IT UP BECAUSE IT’S FUCKING BATSHIT AND ALSO A VERY APPROPRIATE COMPARISON FOR THIS SHIT.

So everybody’s charging back into Winterfell and Barack is trying to light some big trench thing. But it’s so fucking dark and blizzardy that D-Baby’s like -

And so our boys keep trying all these different non-dragon ways to light them but the zombies are just like -

So at this point I legit think Barack is gonna jump in like -

But then I remember WE GOT BIG RED! Who decides to take this opportunity to move. So. Fucking. Slowly.

Finally she gets to the trench and she’s all -

And the trench is like -

Meanwhile, down in the crypts, Varys is like, “At least we’re already in a crypt.” And I’m like - IN THIS SITUATION THAT IS NOT A GOOD THING! Like, in the “Game Revealed” doc on this episode, Peter Dinklage literally says, “We’re fighting a guy who can bring the dead back to life and we’ve put the women and children in the crypt. Tyrion’s smart, but I guess not that smart...”

Anyway, back to Bran.

who suddenly is all -

And it’s kinda like, “Fine, Bran, you’re real shitty company anyway.” So he like Vision Quests into the ravens, who fly around for no other purpose other than to give the Night Queen her grand Season 8 entrance.

So she’s here, she’s fierce, her head is her crown, get used to it. And what better way to kick things off than waving her little hand and making all the zombies go -

right into the fire. So now we gotta defend the wall. Except they’re all like -

While the Night Queen finds J-Snow and is like -

Anyway, there’s a lot more fighting.

And in the middle of it all, the Hound is in full meltdown mode.

Luckily Arya’s here all -

And then something crazy happens. So like Lady Sophia Grace is back.

When suddenly, the Zombie Version of the Giant Who Doesn’t Like People Looking At Him crashes the party like -

And ohmigod he is so fucking rude he just like BITCHSLAPS Lady Sophia Grace to the ground.

And then Lady Sophia screams like the fucking fierce bitch she is and charges him, only to get squeezed like a mother. fucking. bug. And the Giant is like totally gonna fucking eat her.

But she’s still like -

And she stabs him in the fucking eye. 

She still dies though. RIP Lady Sophia.

Okay, so somewhere in the middle of all this, THIS happens to Arya -

So she’s running around the castle with like a minor concussion all -

until she stumbles into the Library Section of the Haunted Mansion, where the more literate zombies are browsing.

So she distracts them with a diversion.

Yes, Legolas, that’s what I just fucking said. And then she’s outta there. But not before accidentally kabobbing Sharon Needles, who was just on her way to pick up a nice periodical, causing Sharon to relive her best runway -

Like, thanks Arya for making her even more fierce.

Anyway, she finally gets out of there and she’s all -

But then the zombies are like -

and then it’s just like -

Until she runs into the Hound and Eyepatch Dude, who totally bites it in a fierce-ass Jesus pose to save her.

RIP Eyepatch Dude.  Okay, at this point Arya and the Hound happen to find the one room with a door the zombies can’t Koolaid-Man through, and who should be chilling in there but BIG RED! And she’s all, “What do we say to the God of Death?” And Arya’s like -

Meanwhile, the Night Queen’s starting to blow shit up when J-Snow’s dragon attacks hers and totally Mike Tysons it.

So the Night Queen’s all -

and J-Snow’s dragon is all -

Meanwhile, D-Baby finds the Night Queen and is all -

But Ms. Queen is just like -

and heads off into the castle with the biggest shit-eating grin you’ve ever seen in your life. So J-Snow’s after him all -

And Ms. Queen turns.

Before deciding to recreate her greatest hit - 

J-Snow’s like -

But it’s too late, because everyone is all -

And Ms. Queen just turns around like -

Okay, so meanwhile down in the crypt, everyone is totally shook that the dead are coming back to life and I’m just like -

While upstairs, D-Baby is too busy staring at J-Snow to realize the zombies are mauling her dragon for autographs! So the dragon is like -

But winds up knocking D-Baby off!!! So she’s like totally gone-zo when who should come to her rescue but Jorah!

Anyway, J-Snow’s trying to get to Bran, because like - God forbid he get interrupted on his raven joyride. And he sees Sam, who seems to be spending this entire episode all -

But J-Snow’s like -

So anyway, shit’s really hitting the fan now, and P-Dinky and Sansa are looking at each other all -

When the music decides to bring things down a bit.

And it’s just like zombie dragon flipping out, people dying, Jorah going all -

And meanwhile Theon and the Ironborn have decided that the best way to protect Bran is just to use arrows? But like now Theon has a spear? Anyway, Ms. Queen and the Frosty Posse are strutting into the godswood all -

And Bran has had enough fucking around with the ravens, so he comes back to earth long enough to tell Theon -

Which I guess translates to, “Go charge the Magic Ice Man For Me Even Though He’s Def Gonna Kill You, Charlie Brown.” Anyway, Theon? He dead, and so Ms. Queen can truck on to Bran like -

Until finally he’s there. And Ms. Queen is all -

And Bran is like -

And truly truly truly I thought it was gonna end here. Or like, Ms. Queen would take Bran and that’d be that. But never in a million years, and I mean a MILLION YEARS did I think Arya was gonna come flying in like -

‘Cause she goes -

And he goes -

And then everything’s just like -

At this point everyone ON the show, WATCHING the show, or in any way affiliated with the show is just like -

Except for Bran. ‘Cause like. Of course.

So now all that’s left is for Big Red to walk off into the sunset all -

Sleep, Big Red. You done good.

BOOB COUNT: NONE! BODY COUNT: Bitch, I’m not counting. But RIP Dolorous Edd, Lady Sophia Grace, Beric Dondarrion, Theon Greyjoy, Zombie Viserion, The Night Queen, Jorah Mormont, Melisandre EPISODE GRADE: B+

THE SER POUNCE MEMORIAL FOR STRAY THOUGHTS

First off, a very sincere hats off to director Miguel Sapochnik (of “Hardhome,” “Battle of the Bastards,” and “The Winds of Winter”) and the entire cast and crew for pulling this off. Thrones spoils us, but the fact of the matter is that no other show is giving this level of production on television, and the technical virtuosity on display is out of this world. Check out “The Game Revealed” for this week for a 40-minute deep dive into the 55-night shoot that was this episode - it’s good stuff. Now, let’s pick it apart a little.

Okay, so very cool, we have the Dothraki with the flaming arakhs charging and then the flames going out, but like - what was the plan here? Because everybody knows you gotta burn these zombies to really end them, and they didn’t know Melisandre was coming. So essentially, they were just gonna charge their best fighters at the zombies and like… see what happened?

The sequence after the fires went out and some horses and Dothraki and Jorah came running back was haunting. But I did think it was foreboding something other than just like “We’re running away from zombies.”

Jon’s first line of the episode and seemingly the only thing he says anymore, “The Night King is coming.” In fact, because he’s said this so fucking much, I’d forgotten that Daenerys and he were charged primarily with taking out the Night King. This could’ve been established a little better. Like yes they talked about it last episode, but I could’ve used being re-oriented insofar as “Okay, these two are with the dragons over here literally waiting till the Night King shows himself” because I found myself often wondering why the fuck they weren’t just roasting zombies.

There was obviously an unprecedented scope to this battle, and seeing grand moments like the Unsullied defending the gate was a really cool payoff for an army we’ve been with for 6 seasons now.

That said, something I thought was highly unsuccessful about this episode was how detached it felt from last week’s, which reinvested me in pretty much all these characters. The wider and chaotic look at this battle made it hard to focus on those characters, and while I appreciated the immersion of the sequence, it grew tiring for me.

A nice zoom-in moment is with Grey Worm at the gate, trying to figure out what to do. But the geography of where Melisandre was and when the idea came to him to use her for the trench was confusing.

“Maybe we should have stayed married.” “You were the best of them.” “What a terrifying thought.”

Ramin Djawadi started this awesome White Walker cue back on “Hardhome” that sounds like a clock ticking and I love it every time he uses it. Also his cue “The Night King” is perfection.

Great use of color in this episode to delineate the stages of the battle. And I know we’re all giving it shit for being hard to see, but I’d imagine the blizzardy chaos and the hellfire that dominates the trench section helped them stretch their budget by obscuring most of the backgrounds.

Love, love, loved the library scene.

Let’s not pretend they didn’t crib Helm’s Deep pretty hard here. Melisandre’s arrival was the Elves, the crypts were the glittering caves. We had wall climbing and very similar all is lost moments. It’s a good thing to steal from, but let’s not pretend.

Beautiful work from Sophie Turner and Peter Dinklage in the crypts.

I was very satisfied by all the major deaths this week, in particular Theon’s, but the idea that Bran had to rubber stamp that Theon was “a good man” irritated me a little. The whole thing of Thrones has been that these people are complicated, and Theon is one of the most complicated. So to just sweep it all under the rug and come down hard on one side of it felt reductive. Anyway, RIP Alfie Allen, one of my favorite actors on the show.

RIP also to Iain Glen, our Jorah 5EVER.

Alas, Bran is still with us, and he was another hugely unsuccessful element of the episode. Using him as the Macguffin was a good idea, but D&D never succeeded at explaining what it was that was so important about him to the Night King. Likewise, when he went into the ravens and people were protecting him, wouldn’t it have been stronger if he was actually doing something of use? Something that if it was interrupted would ruin everything? Rather than just joy-riding?

I’ve seen a lot of people wish more characters had died, and I hear that. But it’s a tricky thing at this point on the show. As much as Thrones has been unafraid of killing its characters, it’s never done it in a random way. Ned died as a consequence for his actions, as do pretty much all the major characters on the show. To just randomly start killing them sounds like something that would happen in a battle, sure, but would be largely unsatisfying. And we know these characters so well now that moments need to be made of their demises. I thought the show did an excellent job of dispatching a fairly substantial crew of major characters in a satisfying way, but too much of this and it’s gonna get tiring.

Speaking of which, the Night King. Okay, so Arya killing him was obviously outstanding, made even more satisfying by the fact that it made complete sense with her arc and that Sapochnik was so successful in setting it up so clearly in the episode and then making us completely forget about it. When she stabbed him and he exploded, I honestly could not believe what I was seeing. One of the most satisfying crowd-pleaser moments I’ve ever seen.

That said, the thing that stinks up this episode for me is not that it was hard to see or that not enough people died, but that the White Walkers ultimately amounted to nothing. I love love love the device of killing them with three episodes left to go and refocusing the show on the political, but the Night King was such an amazing villain because of his mystery and the promise that one day we’d find out what his M.O. was. I worried last week that when the characters perfunctorily said he wants to destroy history, that was all we’d get in the way of that but sadly, it seems it may be. We should’ve known they wouldn’t handle this very well when they swept the White Walker origin story under the rug in Season 6, but it’s very disappointing to see that ultimately he was just a bad dude. The way it ended was epic, but we deserved to know more about motivations and the stakes of the situation before it was all over. To sum it up, D&D are very lucky that their fairly mid-level writing is in the hands of a master like Sapochnik and a dynamite cast and crew.

NEXT WEEK: Cersei’s back.

[mzungustories]

El Gran Partido

Tuesday, October 11th, 2016.

It’s here. The day is here. Rough weekend aside, we’ve made it to game day! I mean, it was the inspiration for this entire trip after all. I can tell as soon as I wake up that there is an air of excitement floating about the city. The TV is already on full blast, broadcasting the pregame celebrations and outlooks for the game. The sky is overcast and there is a small prediction of rain in the future, but the temperature is perfect and I guess cloudy skies aren’t the worst thing we could have today. Hell, it’s probably a blessing in disguise, no one wants to bake in the sun for hours on end.

The boys are pretty much glued to the TV while I get ready, which is just as well, I need a second to get myself prepared this morning, preferably alone. I am absolutely psyched, don’t get me wrong, but I don’t want another pompous, overwhelmed, American bitch fit. Some mental prep and a good shower are surely in need this morning. A relaxing cold shower to some old-school Panic! At the Disco and I am ready to go. I don the yellow jersey, take one last deep breath and join the chaos that is already the apartment. Game day; it’s insanity across all cultures, I guess. I am ready, although I can honestly say I didn’t think I would have ever be standing here, in a bright yellow jersey, with four bantering Colombianos, on my way to a World Cup qualifying game. Never in a million years. If you had told me this two years ago, even with my love for travel then, I probably wouldn’t have believed you. So it goes.

We set out after a few early morning beers and snag a cab to head towards the stadium. The streets are already pandemonium and you would be hard pressed to find someone walking around without a jersey. Yellow swims through the city as far as the eye can see. We cram into a cab, this time with me straddling Ruben in the back and weave through the crowds of people in the street. The closer we get, the more people flood the streets. At some point, it’s next to impossible for the taxi to move any closer, so we get out to join the sea of people.

Wow. I mean, that’s all I really got right now, is just…just wow. We wade through the people to a side streets to have a few beers before we go into the stadium. In usual fashion, beers are expensive inside the stadium, so everyone usually has a few outside first. I guess I would call this Colombian tailgating, huh? Arturo hadn’t originally planned on coming at all, so we are tasked with first finding him a ticket. Seeing as how we have assigned seats, I’m not really sure how this is expected to work, but the boys seem pretty sure about it. I laugh watching them check tickets to make sure they are real. A lot of people make fake ones because there really isn’t shit you can do if you get up to the gates and it doesn’t scan. Free money in their pockets. Apparently a lot of the fakes are really good. Some even scan, if even only by accident.

After sifting through a few different tickets and going over them like diamondeers, they finally settle on one and so we head towards the stadium. Ruben gets a good grip on me before heading over, reminding me to keep my purse close. As far as I can see, I am the only gringa in the crowd, so needless to say, I kind of stick out. At least I decided to wear my yellow jersey instead of my white Copa Americana one. As if my thin blonde hair doesn’t make me stick out enough, I wouldn’t want to be wearing a Colombian jersey that was super hard to find in Colombia. That and I would prefer not to be wearing a see-through shirt in the event that it rains. Look at me, thinking ahead for once.

Holy shit, the amount of people here! I am currently feeling very thankful for American event planning. I do have to say that we kind of have that shit down. People directing, orderly lines and plenty of event staff, we know how to run a show. There aren’t designated lines here until you get closer, so it’s basically a free for all until then. Shuffle, shuffle and try not to lose your group. Once we get up to the gates, they separate people by gender for security screening. This part I remember from our scary little experience in Bogota. Girls more or less get a quick once over with the wand and the boys get the next best thing to a cavity search. To be fair, there are significantly more men here than women (which I would say is vastly different from American football), but I didn’t think I would appreciate having my junk fondled every time I was heading to see my favorite team play, just saying. Arturo’s ticket scans after all is said and done and the boys pass their friskings and boom, we’re in.

Okay Vaca, hella props to you, because these seats are fucking amazing. We are literally front row farther to one end, pretty much ON the field and it is amazing. Since it doesn’t really seem that people do too much sitting in their seats, we’re able to sneak Arturo down with us even though his seat is glob knows where else. The roar is unbelievable, thousands of people making a wall of collective noise; yells, vuvuzelas (remember those damn things?) and noise makers echo from every inch of the stadium. I can’t help but stand here like a moron and just smile.

Ever had a moment where you just ask yourself how the Hell you got here? I’m definitely having one of those moments right now and it’s making my brain buzz. The series of events that lead to me standing in the front row of a Colombia v Uruguay game in Barranquilla is admittedly a weird one that started with coming out of my atheist closet. How bloody weird is that? So, coming out as an atheist lead to me going to Rock Island, which led me to hungering for an adventure to South America which led to me talking to a coworker that convinced me to choose Colombia over Bolivia, which led to me arriving at a February Gringo Tuesday in Bogota which led to me meeting Camilo which led to our Florida trip, which led to this very moment. Had any one those things not happened, I would never have ever come to a game at all. Like…how weird is that? Had any one of those things not happened, I wouldn’t have even met Camilo or Ruben or Vaca or Arturo at all. Shit, they might not have even been here. Life is crazy; just a weird menagerie of timelines constantly colliding and ricocheting off each other. So it goes.

The game kicks off with the national anthem and introduction of the players. I always love hearing other countries’ national anthem, because compared to ours, they are so lively. Everyone joins in on singing and shouting and it’s not this dreary composition about war. It’s usually so much happier. Now don’t go and think I’m being unpatriotic here, because you must admit that the American national anthem is kind of a weird, slow, showy song about war that we all get emotional about. We stand in silence with our hands over our hearts and are expected to stare at the flag. I definitely have respect for it and the flag and the country and all that stuff, so don’t get me wrong, but it’s just weird when you compare it to other countries’ anthems. I mean, “O! Canada” and “God Save the Queen” are usually drunkenly shouted at those matches, so it just seems weird that we’d be so solemn when we’re such stupid nutcases for our ‘Murica. That’s all. The fact that I have to explain that in such detail to stave off criticism is kind of explanation enough, we are weirdly touchy about our anthem. Remember when Coke got torn to shreds on social media for having a commercial of people singing “America the Beautiful” in different languages during the Super Bowl? People flipped absolute shit and decried treason and that was just a song written for a newspaper poetry contest by a lesbian in the late 1800s. Yeah, we’re fucking sensitive.

When they introduce the starting line-up for Uruguay, there is mostly silence, but once they get to the Colombian players, the crowd goes absolutely batshit. Giant jerseys are unfurled over the crowd at the introduction of each player. Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem like James, my favorite player, will be on the field tonight, but I’m not complaining. It’s impossible to be disappointed in this atmosphere.  Things are already getting pitched onto the field and the game has hardly even started.

GOOOOOOOOAALLLLLLL! COLLLOOMMMMBIIIAAAA!!! Looks like I won’t be seeing a scoreless game after all. A bunch of futbol haters at work were betting money that it’d be zips just because I was here. Hah! Jokes on you! I didn’t think it was possible for the crowd to get any louder, but here they are, going nuts. Not soon after, the skies open up over the stadium with thick, drenching rain. Good thing I didn’t wear that white jersey after all! Part of the stadium is covered, but definitely not where we are in the front row. Fucking Hurricane Matthew. As if it weren’t bad enough that it had to nearly ruin my trip altogether, it also had to try its best to ruin the game as well. A few women move to seek cover from the rain and I have to laugh when Vaca follows after them. Camilo shakes his head and yells “pussy” after him. Must not have wanted to mess up his hair, I say back, winking.

The rain continues for most of the game, finally letting up in the last twenty minutes. Four goals have been scored, making it 2-2. Well, I may not have seen a scoreless game, but I did end up with a tie. Apparently, this doesn’t fair well for Colombia in the World Cup, they had some lost ground to make up from a previous tie. I haven’t looked too much into the South American standings, but from what I understand, Colombia was projected to do pretty well, especially after the mess with Argentina at Copa. I guess they haven’t quite been standing up to that reputation as of late. Boo.

Still, spirits are high as we leave the stadium, albeit a bit soggy. I am soaked to the core, so I am surprised when the taxi we flag down doesn’t seem to mind. The rest of the night is pretty uneventful since everyone is pretty exhausted from the excitement of the game. We run down to the shop to pick up some beer and wine and relax watching the post-game coverage. I’m not as drained as I had thought I would be and it’s funny to watch the post-game when we were just there. Like this shit was just broadcasted all over the world and there I am with the boys, right by the goal in some shots. Crazy.

I wash all of the gameday grime off before bed and snuggle into my king to watch some of the American election coverage. Exciting, I know. I had tried to watch some of the second debate review down here, but it was hard to follow in Spanish. Mostly just trash talk anyway, it’s not like anything important was said. I know people here are concerned and I have to say I don’t blame them. FuckTrumpet is an awful load to swallow. Probably not the best way to end such a glorious day, but I should probably stay up to date with it. So it goes.

Buenos noches Barranquilla, y gracias por el partido.

[ultraericthered]

Anime Update 22

CLANNAD After Story - Finally started After Story and while what I watched felt like a continuation of what I’d already been watching - a second season basically - it still technically counts as a premiere episode. And it’s a Wacky Baseball Episode. Yeah, like they had in Haruhi Suzumiya, Angel Beats!, and even Pokemon: Sun and Moon. That’s seriously how we kick this off. And knowing what’s to come...this is actually really brilliant. This is a positively diabolical way to fake the audience out and put them into a false sense of security about what this series has in store for them later on down the line. It’s cruel but at the same time also really nice to allow us some levity and comedic shenanigans before shit starts getting heavy. And a lot of the comedy here actually really worked. Everything having to do with Yusuke Yoshino was just gold: why has this character been so underutilized before this point? Also great was seeing Kotomi’s genius mind analyzing the playing field before making her play, Nagisa being an adorkable nervous wreck whenever it was her turn to step up to the plate, Akio being a damn good team captain who takes the sport more seriously than he probably should even when he’s injured and benched for it, and everyone crapping on Sunohara because he’s just the worst at everything. It was all so much pure silly fun that the slight mood shift at the end with the slow-motion baseball throw and home run was a bit disconcerting, especially when it transitioned into showing us the Junk Doll. What’s he doing there? Was the game and it’s resolution all a memory of his? 

Dragon Ball - I very much remember this one with the fight against the bizarre pirate robot. I recall thinking that this damn robot might just be tougher to beat than fucking Freeza! Watching it now, I don’t know why I’d ever thought that - not only did it take WAY more episodes to fight and defeat Freeza, but there was only ONE point in this episode where the robot implausibly escaped death (it was when it burst back out of the water to chase Bulma and Krillin around even when it ought to have blown up by them - that had me going “COME ON! It’s seriously not waterproof, is it?”). Otherwise, the fake out “ends” to the fight had their fakeness pretty telegraphed so that you knew it wasn’t over yet, and once Goku managed a strong enough blast, the bot was easily demolished. But even after that, we’re not in the clear ‘cause Bulma and Krillin are diving (literally) ahead without Goku, who’s going around in circles thanks to Blue ensuring that he’s deliberately misled. It’s amazing how competent this dude is, especially compared to the army officers who came before him! Won’t be long now before this danger in the deep reaches it’s end...

Love Live! - Watched episodes 3 and 4, and I definitely felt the former more than the latter. I just really like the main trio of Honoka, Umi, and Kotori - their individual characters aren’t the strongest, but when they bounce off of each other, they’re golden. Honoka in this dub owes a ton of her charm and appeal to Marrieve Herrington’s voice acting, as she really sells the flighty, Book Dumb but all too passionate and committed Genki Girl nature of the character (she’s basically the template the franchise had for a group leader before the creators went “let’s make it even more batshit fruit loopy and also more vulnerable underneath” and made Chika Takami), and Umi has just been hilarious in general, endearing me to her with her fear of public immodesty and the whole “just imagine they’re vegetables!” thing. Don’t have as good a grasp on Kotori yet, but I’m sure there’s something for her later on down the line. Also...MASSIVE bitch move from Eli in scheduling the first µ's performance for a time where the auditorium was completely vacant. Was so glad to see Nozomi undermine her boss’ plans again and save that show from failure (though is “one day, we’ll fill up this auditorium” supposed to be the “one day we’ll turn that 0 into a 1″ of this show? It doesn’t have the same power to it, as it’s just an extension of the “we’ll save this school” Mission From God goal we already started with). The latter episode didn’t engage me as much because I just don’t find Hanayo, Rin, and Maki to be all that interesting. Hanayo’s the typical Shrinking Violet bookworm who pulls the “The Glasses Have Got To Go” trope for no reason, Rin’s the typical tomboy athlete who struggles with showcasing any natural femininity, and Maki really confounds me in how she’s this blushing, reluctant Tsundere-type...but don’t we already have the type of character in Umi? They just seem to exist to fill in slots rather than stand as their own distinguished characters. The evil Kurumi lookalike at the end, though...now SHE has got potential and I look forward to seeing where things go with her.

My-HIME - See, THIS is the kind of setup that actually pulls you into the show. We actually get to see the main school setting and all it’s facilities (they’ve even got a fucking church here), we’re introduced to the absurdly powerful student council (I love them and their voice acting is actually competent too - Shizuru with her pleasant Southern accent, Reito with his soothing Adam Driver sounding voice, and Haruka being almost a female Katsuhiko Jinnai except not quite as Extra to the point of supervillainy like him). we properly meet Natsuki Kuga and get the idea that there are different factions at play behind the scenes of this school (HIME, Orphans, District One - what are they? So much intrigue!), Mikoto starts doing more AND talking more (her voice acting s also pretty spot-on), and we get more from the undeniably sinister yet delightfully cheery little gremlin named Nagi (his voice acting is still awkward, but for this character that actually really works - sort of like Kyle Sturdivant as Kaworu in the original ADV dub of Neon Genesis Evangelion). Mai herself continues to be a lovable lead character and I loved seeing her own powers awaken as she gained her own Child to fight the Orphan with. Since episode 2 ended at an abrupt place, I had to watch some of episode 3 right up until the big explosion. Wonder if our heroines made it out of that? 

Ace Attorney S2 - OK, this case is just BALLS. For once it’s about a theft of a priceless artifact (the Fey family’s mystic urn) rather than an accusation of murder, the guy being accused of being the masked thief clearly IS the masked thief but he is such a total pussy without the mask on, a detective who’s NOT Dick Gumshoe for once shows up on the scene and he’s a slender Oswald Cobblepot lookalike who is constantly speaking in alliterations, the prosecutor this time is a coffee-obsessed cyborg man with an awesome voice (sounds like a cross between Anthony Hopkins as Hannibal Lecter and a Steve Blum performance) whose OBJECTIONS have him throwing coffee at Nick’s face and who can then summon another coffee mug to his hand from fucking nowhere through sheer force of will, Larry Butz returns but actually manages to be helpful in bringing the case to a close, and then when it looks to be over, a surprise trap is sprung and now the defendant is going BACK on trial but accused of a murder this time! It’s madness and I am enjoying every minute of it! Also, Adrian Andrews is back, a happier person than she was before and even getting some nice comedic moments, so that was a very welcome addition. The only part I wasn’t too keen on was when Nick agreed to defend the thief in court, Maya went all “But this guy stole our family’s urn! How DARE you choose to do your job by defending him in court even when his guilt is most likely!”, which ties back into the issue I had with “Farewell, My Turnabout” - the likelihood or even certainty of a client’s guilt isn’t a deal-breaker for a defense attorney and it really shouldn’t be treated as such. Thankfully Maya was framed being in the wrong there and she apologized for it later, so even the writing seems to be learning from it’s own missteps here.

Nadja of Tomorrow - Ah, here we are at Filler Episode Number Two! This one, centering around a crew of pirates pretending to be a ghost ship threatening the transport ship the Dandelion Troupe is on and the Troupe fighting back, was just pure brainless fun. We got to see both the greatest weaknesses of each individual Troupe member and their greatest strengths on full display here and by the time the big fight breaks out set to the Can-Can Dance, it’s glorious. The funniest part of all, though? Nadja goes the entire episode - the ENTIRE EPISODE - struggling with using a sewing machine to make a new dress in her ship canon, completely oblivious to everything that’s happening above deck. So for once, Nadja was not part of the action here at all, which made having to watch her travelling circus family sort all that shit out by themselves that much funnier. After this, we’re in Spain. Oh boy. I can recall some...things happening there.

Mobile Fighter G Gundam - Good lord was I not feeling this one. For the most part, anyway - the stuff with Chibodee, his PTSD over having been overtaken by the Dark Gundam, and how he and Domon started improving their fighting skills just from watching each other was actually really great and if it had carried the whole episode, I’d have liked it better. But that stuff was sadly put to the side of the main plot of Chibodee’s four woman crew randomly deciding to take a villainous turn for this episode and steal Shining Gundam’s design graph so that Chibodee could know Domon’s weak points, and Rain chasing after them to get it back. Beyond the tone being silly in a not-so-good way and the dub script and voice acting doing nothing to make it less cringe-worthy, there were three big problems I had with it. Firstly, the BEYOND PAINFUL exposition dump the girls did about their shady past and how they were turned around from it by joining Chibodee as his fight assistance crew: all four of these girls know this story, they were all there and experienced it together, so what the fuck are they doing relaying it to each other? Secondly, what that story basically amounted to was uncomfortable (and uncharacteristic for this show) sexism that played into the exact trope that animebw briefly discussed during his recent Pokemon binge - girls had a problem in their lives, one dude does one thing to remedy that problem, and as a result the girls all fawn over the dude and live solely to service him, becoming his own personal Pokemon team. Chibodee doesn’t even strike me as the kind of guy who was ever asking for that sort of blind devotion from them, so it’s inexcusable that all four of them be written in a way that makes them act like his submissive servants. And thirdly, what the hell was up with Schwarz Bruder? I get that he was manipulating this situation so that Domon and Chibodee could improve themselves, but the episode cast him in such a villainous light, complete with him laughing evilly in practically every scene he appeared in. Schwarz, you are no substitute for Master Asia. Stop trying to be Master Asia. All in all, was not a big fan of this episode and what it did. Not as irredeemably awful as the Neo Mexico episode, but still not as good as Chibodee’s debut episode.

The Rising of the Shield Hero - So I watched the second episode. Y’know, the one where Naofumi famously declares “Slaves aren’t people!” and buys Raphtalia as a slave for him to use and abuse as he sees fit so long as she fights battles for him that he with his shield can’t fight? And then Raphtalia goes and develops Stockholm Syndrome for her new master because he treats her nicer than all the others did (letting her eat more, sharing an inn room with her, giving her a ball to play with when he sees she really wants one), so I guess that just negates the fact that he owns her like his property and forces her into combat even when she doesn’t want to fight or kill anyone, which causes the seal on her to physically torture her with painful volts of magic when she naturally says “No, I cannot and will not do that!” Actually, as harsh and uncomfortable as the situation is, the fact that Naofumi and Raphtalia are operating under very different mental wavelengths is pretty interesting. Raph looks at the acts of kindness that Naofumi is performing for her and begins to see him as her new parent; someone to take care of her and for her to love and devote herself to. Naofumi, meanwhile, just sees her as a slave - as a combat accessory that he can use to fight his battles for him so that he may survive in this world and level up along with the slave so that both may be strong enough to fight against the next Wave when it hits. So poor Raph is looking for guidance and parental love to fill the void left behind by her parent’s tragic demise, but is misplacing that yearning by becoming dependent on her abuser. And look, I love Shield Dad Naofumi that we get later in the series and think the bond he shares with the girls who follow him is pretty sweet...but the Naofumi at this point in time, in this episode, is NOT that Naofumi - this Naofumi, regardless of how he might dress it up with occasional acts of basic decency, is an abuser. If he actually truly cared about Raph as an individual, he’d have revoked her slave status and stop asking things of her that he knows she’s not okay with a long time back, but he doesn’t. Even the “Fine, I’ll fight this thing on my own while allowing you to run away to safety and freedom!” thing at the end has VERY questionable sincerity since it comes after Naofumi has already learned of what befell Raph’s parents, so for all we know, he was deliberately invoking her parents fate as a tactic to get Raph to stay and fight for him. This could easily make the guy seem irredeemable, but if there was one thing I really liked about the episode it was that it didn’t wholly demonize Naofumi to the point where we can no longer see someone who COULD eventually turn himself around and be a better person. That little speech he made to Raph about why her fighting alongside him is absolutely necessary for both themselves and for countless innocent lives that could suffer like Raph suffered thanks to what the Waves unleash actually made a ton of logical sense, and the part even earlier where Raph awoke from a trauma-induced nightmare of her parents’ death and his first immediate instinct to her freaking out is to visibly worry for her, ask what’s wrong, and put his arms around her to comfort her and tell her everything is alright really goes a long way in humanizing him, showing that just as there’s a decent story buried beneath this dumpster fire of a show, there’s a decent human being buried beneath this dumpster fire of a person. So again, points for making the lead character interesting, but everything else is...eh?

AND

SSSS Gridman - Finally got back to this one, and boy was it not pulling any punches. It feels like a good “new start” episode, complete with an upgraded version of the first Kaiju that Gridman fought, and the credits going over a special ending sequence in the episode, so I’m glad I saved it for 2020. The show stealer here, as is always the case with this show, was Akane Shinjo - I knew it was coming but I was still impressed at how she just calls her enemies over to her in the classroom and brazenly admits “Yeah, I’m the one making all the Kaiju. Problem?” and then even shows them what the next Kaiju will be and when it’s going to attack (the day of the school festival). It’s as Utsumi said; a declaration of war. She’s just daring the Gridman Alliance to try to stop her now that they know all the facts, ‘cause if they don’t she will have her Kaiju wreck the festival and kill as many people in attendance as it’s able to kill. It’s strange how Akane is a very funny villain to watch, with her high pitched voice and provocative way of speaking and how she really is just a huge geek girl on a power high, but she’s also so freaking scary, and nowhere was that clearer than in the scene with her and Rikka on the bus. As a viewer, I was really enjoying the Rikka-Akane dynamic of friendship and gayness whenever it popped up, and now this episode throws your whole outlook on it into question - Rikka is a creation of Akane’s Kaiju just as everyone else in this digital simulation town, and she was literally MADE to be Akane’s friend. So does it really count as friendship if it’s in Rikka’s very being, in her nature and her “programming”, to love this girl no matter what? Is it okay to continue liking and supporting this relationship when one party involved literally has no actual choice in how she feels about the other? Akane now comes off as an absolute creep who Rikka, and anyone really, would be far better off without having hanging around them in their lives, so if Rikka were to rise above what her own programmed nature dictates of her, will she cut ties with Akane? Should she? I kind of already know how conclusively these questions are ultimately answered, but it’s interesting to see how they’re raised at this time. 

Other things that stood out in this episode was that “With your powers combined”, that old Captain Planet phrase, literally being spoken word for word, the Spock and McCoy-esque “Logic VS Emotion” argument between Utsumi and Rikka (a really good scene too, especially with how even Gridman himself acknowledges that this is a matter with no easy answers and how both sides of the argument make good, technically correct points), the random Akko cameo, Anti beginning his redemption arc all starving, homeless, and missing an eye, Gridman subverting Akane and Alexis’ expectations by “attacking” the festival first in order to cause evacuations before the Kaiju showed up to be reactive for a change, just how fucking unhinged Akane is while trying to destroy Gridman at this point, and that post-credits scene. Hey, you know why Alexis has that Hades-esque mane of blue flames? Because he is the fucking DEVIL.

Will come back to this series next month with Episode 9. AKA: THE episode of the whole fucking show. ....I don’t think I’ll be ready.

[cheerstocrazy]

Dates with Hippie

9/7 Met him from Hinge. We actually swiped right on each other a couple of years ago from Bumble, but I don’t think he remembers, and I only remember bc I stalked him and was making fun of him with PP abt a white guy loving India. He was really eager in conversations with me and replied hella quickly. He even told me I was cute TWICE, when he had never met me in person. He invited me to the mariachi festival at DTSA. I was thinking mariachi?? Whatever, be a good sport. Parking was a nightmare. Walked around bc he wasn’t replying to my texts, watched the mariachi on my own. Started walking toward Wursthaus and saw him, and thought hey, he’s pretty cool, tall, looks abt the same as his photos or even better. Called him to tell him I was there and asked where he was. I don’t think he took it as srsly as he should have. He wasn’t really talking to me?? And was more invested in the performances and also his cousin came, so he was with us the whole time. It was so weird. We weren’t really talking abt anything except what music we both liked. He also seemed to know everyone in DTSA. He went to fix the sound when the girl’s PA wasn’t working. I was thinking wtf, you’re supposed to be on a date WITH ME, talking TO ME. Here you are leaving me alone and talking to other people. My parking meter was going to expire in 90 mins, and I was thinking abt booking it then. I was over watching the girl at the stage, so he said we should go to the mariachi stage to catch his friends. I wanted a drink and mentioned that too….saying I wanted a Michelada. It was 10 bucks, such a scam!! And I was like can we pleaseeeeee go get a drink, I’M DYING!!!! We went to Vacation bar and got a batshit host who talked too much. We got Mezcal drinks, and he was asking me abt my spirit animal, and I straight up said Joanne the scammer. Then he said no, a literal animal, so I said a sloth lol. Then after I heard their way better answers, I was like have you guys thought abt this in detail? I asked what animal is a savage. And they probed me abt how savage I was. I replied: I am the most savage person you have ever met. I’m withholding it rn bc you guys aren’t ready for who I really am. Randal said trust me, you can’t shock me, just be who you really are. That’s what I want to know abt people, who they really are and upfront so I’m not shocked later on. I was like you have no idea who I am. And I’m savage for a reason, you don’t know what my intentions are. You have to know if I’m actually a good person or not, and you need way more context to get what I’m saying. My savagery isn’t from malice, it’s for fun and bc I’m evil. They also insulted me correct gif pronunciation. He asked me abt Jorja Smith. I said I would reincarnate as her. We shit on the govt a little bit, and I said whatever you feel, I feel it 5x stronger. Idr the rest, we left to go back to the mariachi. He saw more of his friends, he was planning on hanging out with his group of friends then he lost them. We ended up going to The Gypsy Den, so his cousin could pee. I also finally checked my phone to realize my PARKING METER HAD EXPIRED FOR OVER AN HR. I WAS FREAKING OUT. I CAN’T AFFORD A TICKET!!!! I ran back to find out someone had put more money in my meter. YOU FREAKING ANGEL!!!!! THANK YOU SO MUCHH!!!! The car behind me had been ticketed. I am so lucky. Bless up. There are good people in the universe. He asked me do you have rhythm? I was like with what? Dancing? Yes ofc, I’m not a gringo. I came back and we went to an art gallery. Randall asked me what my thoughts were. Me: I don’t like this art/paintings. It’s all dumb and I don’t get it. We went to this other gallery area and he asked me what my thoughts were on this seemingly Japanese and Native American painting. To which I replied, cultural appropriation. I said I would need more context from this artist to see if he/she really understand the history of these people and how their paintings were highlighting anything abt these cultures. We went into another exhibit, and Idk what lead us to this topic, but I said we need more diversity in art, that goes across literature, music, etc. And that there are a lot of good people in the world, but the bad ones are what you remember. I agreed, but my line of thought was more that the bad have so much power. It fucking sucks knowing I can’t do anything abt it. I said I come from a place of a lot of privilege and I want to lift everyone too. Why do the bad people want to suppress and oppress people?? After this, we wanted to go get drinks but his cousin wanted food, so he FINALLY LEFT, SO WE COULD TALK ALONE. We watched this older group of men perform some surfy music, which was not bad at all. I enjoyed it a lot. It was funny bc everyone stood in this whole ass perimeter away from the musicians. Idky they self-segregated, it made me laugh. If nothing else, this is what I’ll take away from Randall’s date with me. We were laughing at this one lady who was dancing in the middle and recording some of the band. I referenced Kris Jenner’s You’re doing amazing, sweetie, and he didn’t get it smh. By now, he had put his arm around me and was lightly touching me. It was a bit past 10 and his cousin and he were talking abt leaving. He said there was a mezcalero close to his apt, and that I could stop by…...if I wanted, so yeah…..He said it so awkwardly, both his cousin and I were like why’d you have to say it like that?? And he replied, bc that’s who I am...that’s me. Then they both stared at me for an answer, and I said stop staring at me, it’s making me uncomfortable. I said I’d come. Parking was horrible. I drank more than I ate yday. I texted him I was there, and he came outside. We walked to the mezcal bar, and the service was shat bc the bartenders were so busy so he asked if I had heard of the Blind Donkey, so we went there instead. Neither of us had been there before, but it was pretty poppin. We got our drinks and I stupidly walked us back out to the entrance thinking it was the upstairs lmao idiot. We sat on a random couch, but it was too loud, so we moved back behind the speakers. They were playing throwback indie bangers, and I was loving. They played Banquet by Bloc Party, and An Honest Mistake by the Bravery. I was like ugh so good, I was sitting dancing, then when Gorillaz DARE came on, I was like okay let’s go dance, and grabbed his hand. He wasn’t a horrible dancer, could use more rhythm, but he was legitimately dancing and having fun, which is what I appreciate! They kept playing really good shit, then he went to dance behind me and sometimes he would wrap his arms around me and hold me which felt nice. And I think his head rested perfectly over my head bc I’m that small. I turned around at one point and kissed him, and he’s not a bad kisser at all. I liked it/him a lot. 8/10. I expect nothing less than his caliber of kissing...Males should not kiss like wet fish or be sloppy. You guys are all old and have had multiple gfs!!! All I have to say for these 90 minutes was that I had a blast, and it was so much fun, and it’ll probably go down as one of my favorite nights of this year. I’m pretty sure we were the only ones dancing at most points of the night, and I DIDN’T EVEN CARE. I am wayyy too tired to process everything, but I had a ton of fun. I mean the latter half of the night will be part of that best night of the year too. Dancing with someone remotely familiar who knows the music is always a fun experience. I asked to leave to get some fresh air, and we hugged outside. He said let’s go take a walk. Not sure what we talked about, but it was nice to be on empty streets walking around. We held hands the entire time. The topic of drugs came up, and I was saying I understand why people take drugs to cope with life bc it’s so fucking hard sometimes, and it’s so overwhelming. It’s hard to deal with it on your own. It’s so hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel sometimes. It feels like a hell hole. He said something along the lines of yeah, I’ve succumbed a few times. I’ve fallen into a depression and went to sleep not wanting to wake up bc there was nothing going for me. Then we got back to his apt area, and we sat on some random steps. Not really sure what we spoke abt here or what his game plan was. He put his arm around me and we chilled. And I kept looking to the left bc I didn’t want to make eye contact to the right O_O He lightly tapped me on my shoulder, so I turned around, then he immediately kissed me (which was so smooth). He’s a great kisser. I liked his rhythm and style. He does the triple lingering kiss at the end which is my favorite thing. He also caresses me full body which is nice too. I’m not that affectionate...so...I’ll work on that. He kissed me all throughout my neck, shoulders, ears. He’s pretty good. At one point, I put my legs over his leg, and it got more intense. He started caressing my legs and going up my thighs. I told myself I wouldn’t get WGW or have sex tonight. Generally, my hand goes immediately to a man’s crotch and I tried to remain as restrained as possible. Then he started going close to my underwear or over it, so I was like yo, 2 can play at this game. And I already knew he had been hard for probably hours, so I grabbed it from outside his pants..and he was wet already. I rubbed his balls, and I could hear him moaning in my ear. He kept putting his hand through my hair to kiss me more intensely, and all I could think was I’M BALD. DON’T DO THIS TO ME. YOU’RE LITERALLY TAKING HAIR OUT!!! My life is already so difficult ); I think earlier he had asked if I was going to drive home or wanted to stay over, and I said I can drive home. He said good bc he lived in a studio and space was limited. Then ¾ into the makeout session, that was TAKING FOREVER with SO MANY PEOPLE PASSING BY AND WATCHING AND SEEING MY CROTCH FLASHED, he whispered, do you really have to go home, can’t you just stay? I didn’t reply. Then this one guy with LLD who made a lot of noise passed by us, so I stopped and looked at him. He laughed….then later he asked can we go to your car and do this in a not so sketchy spot. We are not 17!!!! You are too big for my car anyway. This is fine--there is space here! At points, we would stop kissing and I hugged him tight and rested my head on his shoulder to enjoy the moment, intimacy, and silence. I almost wanted to say this is nice, thanks. Thank god, I didn’t. I also wanted to pull out my phone and soundtrack this scene to Heartbeats by Jose Gonazlez, but that’d be TOO CHEEZY. One time I rested my head on his shoulder and was closing my eyes bc I was so sleepy!!! He’s like are you sleeping??? Bitch I MIGHT BE. I always thought he would finish kissing me after we ended with our lingering kisses, then he’d come back for more. Finally, I said I’m gonna head out bc I’m so tired. He said he’d walk me. We held hands and he walked me back. I said I still have my gum in my mouth, it’s called talent. We kissed AGAIN at the car, then he squeezed me tight and let me go. Told me to drive home safe and light slapped my ass. I was so tired. I still am. How do I feel about all of this? It was a nice and fun night. Did it beat the effortlessness and ease of convo with Liorr? No...But I generally don’t kiss anyone I kind of like/who has potential on the first date. We made out for an entire fucking hour. Holy fuck, NO WATER, NUFFIN. That’s impressive m8. We hung out for about 9 hours. That’s A LONG ASS TIME. I didn’t necessarily feel an intense connection/chemistry, but that’s bc Idk him. There weren’t any red flags for me. Whenever I expressed my opinion, he would validate it and build upon it which is refreshing considering most guys would become defensive and be quick to strike my opinion down. You asked for it, you twats. If you asked me for a perfect date, it would be either be dancing + drinks at a festival/bar, and I got that. I had a fucking blast. Imagine if I actually had a FESTIVAL BAE. WAH ALL I WANT IS TO BE HELD!!! 

9/13 Date #2 

Initial reactions: I felt so safe, seen, understood. It’s so easy. I’m shook. You know how after Tyler and Hannah’s date, Hannah said “I’ve never felt so respected”--that’s how I feel on a smaller scale. I like this d00d bc he has no ego and actually listens to me and replies directly to what I say. We’re so in sync physically, it’s stupid. It’s so easy to talk to him, and the way he holds me--everything. Kill me, I love his kisses; I love the way he smells. He’s way more romantic than me and so affectionate. I am stone cold, and he makes me not want to be that and reciprocate to maybe ⅓ of his level. Who raised him? They did so well! And all his exes did so WELL IN TEACHING HIM HOW TO TREAT A GIRL AND HOW TO KISS. 

I think I like him. That was probably one of my favorite dates ever, if not my favorite date. It was so easy, relaxed, chill, low-key. He said he was leaving for HB early, and wasn’t texting me afterward, so I was kind of hesitant if he actually left or not. I was thinking, “What if I get stood up? Whatever, I can drink at the beach by myself. NBD” He did reply and said he was parked which made me feel relieved. I got out of the car and saw that he was parked and walking toward me. I’ll never get over how tall he is. He surely is taller than 6 ft!!! We walked toward the beach, talked abt our day. I saw that there was a patrol looking car driving along the street we were walking. It was a trash truck, and it was emptying/putting new bags along the walkway. We walked away, and somehow it would always end up behind us. Whatever. We mostly talked about drugs and his experiences with it. I opened a beer too while we talking. He talked abt his preference for psychedelics. He said he did acid while in India with a girl he met up with whom he had hooked up on and off for 3 years back when he was younger. He said the conversation they had while on acid was the reason they were able to maintain a friendship afterwards, otherwise that would’ve been over. Hmmm, cryptic. We finally got to the benches/tables I wanted to sit at, and I said my boots were hurting (which they were). It was pretty wet, but I put down my blanket for us to sit on it. We talked a lot abt his experiences traveling in Sri Lanka/India. I wanted to know more abt Sri Lanka and how he traveled there. He also said India is his favorite country and he wants to return again next year. I asked him what’s the pull for India? Why? He explained to me he liked the duality and chaos, the mix of wealth and poverty, there’s always a lot going on, etc. I said it’s so strange for me to hear someone who loves it so much when my experience was so different and frustrating. I talked abt the instance where we almost got sexually assaulted. He replied: yeah, sorry about that. That’s horrible, I can’t imagine how it is to travel as a girl there. I really appreciated that response. How many guys in the world would be able to apologize, validate me, and empathize? Maybe 3 people. When we sat next to each other, he always rubbed/caressed my back, and they were really good massages tbh!!! When I was telling my India story, he didn’t really do that anymore, sensing the urgency and conflict to come in my story. And Idk when he did this, but we were talking and he ended up resting his head on my shoulder leaning back into me, and it was so cute, I nearly died. I hadn’t been touching him or doing anything. He seemed to feel really comfortable. We talked a lot abt his marketing agency bg, and we talked abt being laid off and what we did after that. I think we were in this weird intertwined position. He hugged me from behind, and he was sitting to my left, but his head was on my right shoulder, so I leaned opp way..and he replied so basically we did the same shit and ran away, diff times. I told him I had the same birthday as Donald Trump and I could relate to him when I was 12 bc I’ve since grown up. When I was 11, I told a kid who stood up on a chair, “be careful not to break the chair!” My teacher, Thompson smh and was like Natalie, you can’t say shit like that. Hippie said he was never in a position to be a bully bc he moved schools when he was in 4th grade from Mississippi to Louisiana. He said he was a hillbilly and spoke with a different accent. I asked him what kind of accent it was, and he kept saying oh man, Idek how to do it anymore. Saying I reckon etcetc, and I laughed bc I hear that only in shows/movies and from British people. He told me I smelled nice. I said, “You do too! I can’t pinpoint the smell tho.” Him: I did shower! He said it’s probably my conditioner. I smelled his hair, and it was def his conditioner. He said when he was working at his agency, he was considered the nerd there bc he played video games and was weird, then he said when he went to work at Blizzard in Irvine, he felt like a jock bc he has interests outside of video games. I can’t even imagine how dweeby everyone is there. He kept saying how tough this year is for him, but he feels like with the changing of the seasons, fall feels like it’s gonna be better (I BETTER BE A PART OF IT). I was starting to get worked up abt my job and complaining, so he said we don’t have to talk abt work anymore and kissed me. We kissed for a long ass time, and he told me, “I really like kissing you.” I replied “I like kissing you, too.” Then he said something like, “I could just sit here and kiss you all night, it’s ridiculous. I especially love your bottom lip. It’s so *insert adjective I can’t recall thick? Juicy? plump?* He kept playfully kissing only my bottom lip, and it was so cute UGH KILL ME. He kissed every inch of my body, legs to arms, head to toe. HE KNOWS HIS WAY AROUND ;_; He kept telling me I was so cute. He asked me if we could go back somewhere, but I said none of us live near here. Funny tidbit: He fingered me (and it was really smooth and FUCKING GOOD. I think our sex would be incredible) then he when he ended, he licked each finger, and he said, “Damn, you taste so fucking good. Weird compliment, but it’s true.” I laughed. I was wearing my high-waisted shorts, and he kept trying to unzip from the front, and I told him the zipper is on the side. He asked why the belt was in the front? “Aesthetics.” He was super hard, but I didn’t want to go thru the trouble of unbuckling his belt and unzipping. He said you know you can undo my pants. So I did...and he asked if I could do it with one hand. And in my head, I was like BRUH PLS LEAVE IT TO THE EXPERT. During this period was when the trash picking up man kept going back and forth behind us making so much noise. I was like srsly??? WE’RE DOING STUFF HELLO. And people were walking at night too. It’s 2am!!! Why wouldn’t you walk during the daytime??? We hugged each other during these moments and laughed. It was a full moon this night, so the beach was so gorgeous and illuminated. When we finished, he said “I should put my dick away.” It was def above average and kind of long??? At the end of everything, when I was folding up the wet blanket, he came from behind and hugged/held me, saying you’re so freaking cute. We stood there and idk what to do but it felt so nice, safe, warm. *cries* He kissed my neck and did the sideways kiss (which I always find super fucking awkward and unromantic), but it was totally sweet and natural with him. I really relished the quiet moments between us. Then we walked back and were talking abt the govt, economics, and corporations. He and I agree on everything so whatever I said, he’d say too. He walked me to my car and we said bye. He held me and kissed me for an extended amt of time. He kept doing the lingering kisses and I couldn’t bring myself to leave. He’s my favorite kisser for sure. I remember thinking “not to be dramatic, but his kisses could bring world peace.”

9/18 Date #3 in Orange

There were so many things that annoyed me before the date. So he said hey I have the apt to myself, come hang out. I thought I was going to Long Beach. I think I worked a 10 hr day, and was like fuck I have to haul ass up to LB now. GREAT. I texted him I was headed out, then he said he was going to an open mic night in Orange. And I was like well wtf, we made plans and you’re just telling me this now? He always tells me things so last minute. I HATE IT. 

Initial thoughts: I don’t think we’re compatible with each other. I don’t think we’re at the same points in our live bc I’ve just come out of my crisis (it’s been a year), and he’s in the thick of his. I don’t think he has enough security in his life to take on another human. And that’s fine--I’m not even needy (ok kind of) but self-sufficient. Not only is he not ready to be in a relationship, but I don’t think we want the same things right now either or have enough common ground. He’s into playing live music and his music collective; he’s spiritual, into yoga and rock climbing. I’m not into that at all. He’s going to a festival for a while, and it’s all spiritual meditation/yoga, which is my fucking nightmare. He never asks anything abt me. It’s mostly me asking questions and getting to know him. Maybe he was having an off day yday. He literally said “I need a place to live 10/1...and ya that’s not going” I’m pretty level-headed abt this, but also I don’t want to be with someone (even if it’s casual) at their best or normal self. I don’t want to be a burden or carry the weight of their burdens. Is that selfish??? I’m realizing this may not be in and taking it in stride. It doesn’t have to be a permanent thing or even something that endures. It could be temporary idk. I’m tempering my feelings for sure. I don’t think I’m the girl for him. I think I’d be a stabilizing force for him and a good ear to bounce ideas off and someone to whom he could vent, but what’s in that for me? I’m learning to be more selfish, not just with my standards, but what I get out of these things. I didn’t have as much fun this time as the last 2, but the bar was so high from the last 2. We can’t always be our best selves, but I’m always my best self when I’m with someone new. Interesting tidbit: He told me the first time he cried was 2012 to Brokeback Mountain. The moment I knew I wasn’t it: He described his dream house/living situation..He said he only wanted to live with musicians and wanted a spare room with a studio to host jam sessions, playing sessions, which is not to say he wants that exclusively and can’t like other things. But I’m so faaaaaaar from that and any other of his passions. I think he’s so invested in music and has tunnel vision with that, that he only wants to be surrounded by other people who want that, too, whereas most normal musicians have non-music friends too. This is me maybe assuming, but I think I’m astute. At the end of the night, we hugged bye and it felt so weird, and I didn’t know what was gonna happen. Bc the entire time, it felt like I was pulling out teeth to keep the conversation going, and he was so aloof and withdrawn. I would cater the convo to topics he liked, and he would give me depressing answers that took me aback. Like when I asked if he snowboarded, he said no, that could hurt my legs. He was so trite. Talked abt his ACL surgery, everything bad that he had experienced….I heard abt it. It was draining for me to listen and keep up a positive attitude and maintain any semblance of levity. At the end, he hugged me, told me to have fun, and have a safe drive out to Vegas. He held me for a bit, so Idk we ended up kissing. It felt empty. He dropped his skateboard and hydro before he kissed me, kind of clunky, kind of funny. I left feeling discouraged and frustrated.