#this fandom is f*cking pathetic and obsessed

[bohemian-nights]

For the life of me I can’t understand how people think it’s acceptable for House of the Dragon a show that is pushing for more diversity (making the Velaryon’s Black and Mysaria Asian) to race bend the only canonical black character. If they wanted to race bend any of the characters they could’ve made Alys Rivers Indian. They could make Sara Snow Mexican and so on. It’s just so frustrating to see this happen time and time again in media when it comes to the portrayal of WOC in general but especially black women.

Like I don't care if people ship Daemyra you know? If shipping those two makes them happy go for it. My only thing is I just want them to stop with the racist shit they say about all the WOC in Daemon's life. From his lovers (cause they've said some racist shit about Mysaria too) to his wife and to even his daughters. At this point I'm convinced half of them don't even like Daemon because if they did they wouldn't stay shitting on the women who at one point or another were/are important to him.

Idk 🤷🏽‍♀️ it's just very strange to me.

The discourse surrounding Nettles is absolutely crazy and you can tell it’s being fueled by anti-black weirdos who are mainly Dumbnyra stans(lol Team Green have their issues too, but they aren’t the ones who are advocating to race bend Nettles 🙃)

Honestly, I did not have a problem with Dumbnyra(and yes I’m going to call it that) at the beginning of the show. I was indifferent to it. However, that quickly changed when most of the fans started to show themselves to be the racist psychopaths that they are. Down to them literally calling Laena the n-word and celebrating her death🙃:

You might say it’s just a couple of the more “extreme” fans that feel that way, but literally go on their blogs, Twitter accounts, etc., and 90% are arguing some bs.

If it’s not bashing Laena(yes they are still doing this even though she’s dead and according to them Rhaenyra was the love of Daemon’s life so it really doesn’t make sense to do all of this for a dead woman who paled in comparison to the “love of his life”🙃) it’s bashing Nettles.

Boy, do they hate Nettles. I'm posting her picture cause this is the face of their nightmares🤣

If it’s not saying Daemon never loved her and she was just this “giant misunderstanding” between himself and the “love of his life” despite him literally going against his wife and queen’s orders to save her, it’s saying how she’s Daemon’s daughter or Daemon saw her like a daughter.

Their relationship was 100% paternal or mentee/ mentor. Stop mentioning the bath’s which were father-daughter bonding time or the fact that they might’ve slept in the same bed which was just done to comfort a frightened child. Daemon would never get with someone so black I mean so foul-mouthed in canon. She’s just his child😅

Why do you want a bada** with a middle-aged white man? You’re the one with the problem, not me even though I’m trying to infantilize a young black woman and pidgin hole her into the “strong independent black woman” trope while supporting a white woman getting with her uncle cause I can relate to her. I refuse to read the books(or parts of the books) because every time I do I want to ripe out my hair when Daemon and Nettles' relationship is mentioned 🙃

Anyway, if it’s not saying she’s going to be cut and replaced with Rhaena(cause then they know that the relationship would actually be non-romantic☺️), it’s saying and actively hoping she’ll be race bent because they can’t stand the thought of Daemon being with a black woman💁🏽‍♀️:

All minorities are the same don’t cha know 😀and we have too many black people on this show. What we have Corlys, his sons, Rhaena, and Baela. Yes, Rhaena and Baela are mixed, but they count as representation cause their skin isn’t white and I can’t relate because of that. Why add the only in-canon black person when we have a whopping 5 whole black people in a sea of whites 🙃

Also, we don’t know what race Nettles is even though we have pictures of her in the lore and in the books as well as descriptions of her appearance that show that she is black, but again every time Nettles is mentioned I get triggered so I skip over her parts😀

Moving on. If it’s not bashing Nettles they are blatantly ignoring that Rhaena and Baela are Daemon’s daughters and his only daughters. They’ll literally draw a million and one pictures of lizard baby (that’s what I’m calling it, cause again, these people don’t deserve respect) and pretend like it ever drew breath and that it is his only daughter🙃 Or my personal favorite which is essentially Daemon is a good father because he didn’t abandon them on the side of the road (where they belong).

They were educated, clothed, and fed, children don’t need affection, stop complaining. The fandom loves Rhaena and Baela🙃. No one cares about poor Rhaenyra and her boys(who Daemon sees as his real children cause they share the same skin color🙃). That’s why I draw, write, and gif for these poor neglected souls and completely leave out the black ingrates, I mean Rhaena and Baela😅

Finally Mysaria. Oh, Mysaria, I’ve got my own problems with her, but yeah they do bash her by pinning all of Rhaenyra’s psycho deeds on her(so much for your girl being a queen who has "agency"🙃).

Like yeah, she’s not innocent, but she’s not the only one who isn’t innocent, and while I definitely don’t think Daemon was ever that in love with her given how quickly he was willing to call her a wh*re, it hasn’t escaped my notice that the only reason why she isn’t that much of a focus is because they do regulate her to just a wh*re 🙃

They hate Rhea too and try to make her into a groomer to justify Daemon murdering her, but we aren’t going to get into that because we are talking about how this fandom treats the non-white women of Daemon’s life.

Look, I could go on and on, but this ship literally attracts the most racist, white supremacist-leaning, self-hating fans(yes there are Black and other non-white fans who will literally throw their own under a bus for this ship🤦🏽‍♀️), and anti-Black fans by the boat load. And the thing is, they all hide behind “feminism” when called out for it🤣🤣🤣

Yeah, you can ship what you want, but it’s pretty obvious at this point it’s beyond shipping. If you are literally bashing every single woman and girl (especially the non-white women/girls) besides Rhaenyra in Daemon’s life then dude there is something wrong here.

They definitely aren’t Daemon fans(hell he probably has about as many actual fans as Nettles does🤦🏽‍♀️). They are Rhaenyra self-inserters who are pissed off that their ship is on borrowed time and “their man” is about to “leave” their self-insert in the dust for gasp 😱 a black woman so they are taking all the shots they can to feel better about this Titanic ship 🤷🏽‍♀️

[hishoukoku]

Hey fellow zutarian here.

I find it so f*cking funny how heated zk antis get when they find one of us. Like frothing at the mouth, keyboard smashing while typing their rant Angry. It's sad and pathetic how mad they get over a ship. It's ironic how much time they will spend going after zks, compared to how much time they spend actually shipping the ship they support. Those asks you've been getting about antis realizing you are a zk are a prime example.

Coulve easily unfollowed or just filtered the zk tag so they can still follow you for your other content aside from zk. But noooOooOoo they had to go on fiery fueled tantrum in your asks about zk. I could practiclly feel the froth dripping from your ask box (sorry for the nasty imagery). They even had the time to find something you said about zk a while ago and quote it. Like wow.

Anyway just wanted to say you're awesome and I love your blog and ZUTARA FOREVER suck that up antis!

Hey <33

Exactly that's the biggest problem with them. They are soo overly obsessed with zk that they forget to chill and enjoy their own ship(s) and look through their own tags maybe?

That one anon's realization of what I ship was too hilarious to even get angry over it. Idk how they even found that quote given it wasn't a reblog it was a Reply to a post. Like how obsessively are they searching what zk's say including scrolling through replies? It's astonishing to me.

And naaah as soon as they learn I ship zk too, no other fandoms on my blog matter. It's as you said the anger fuelled tantrum takes over and they only see the ask button xD.

Thank you so much for your words, you're awesome too <333 ZUTARA FOREVER indeed !!

[justherefortaylorswift]

there’s glitter on the floor after the party...

Taylor,

*About 9 days ago, on May 22nd, 2018, I had just arrived home from your Seattle show at CenturyLink Field. It was 4am and I couldn’t sleep. I had so much on my mind and was still on a high from your show. So, in the early hours of the morning, after my friends had long gone to bed, I began to write. I’ve revised my original note quite a bit since then. I’ve also had the opportunity to do some additional reflecting since tour, and I have some thoughts. So, I guess this is the end-result of a mash-up of 4AM overly-emotional rambling, combined with well thought-out, fully coherent, mature writing. I feel like I really over-explained this. I could have been a lot less-awkward in setting this up. Let's just get into it:

[SO. I just got home from your Seattle show. It's 4 am and I can't sleep. This was my 6th tour, and I made what seems like an infinite amount of unforgettable memories with a group of incredible people I call my ‘Swiftie Fam” (the name needs work...). There's Cecil (my long-time, Canadian Swiftie friend, you’ll see him in earlier posts), Wanda (Cecil’s wife), Kaeden (7. Cecil & Wanda’s son. Major Swiftie. His first concert!), and finally the beautiful Maile (a recent addition to the fam, and now a life-long friend!).  It’s hard to explain in words, but we all have developed a connection that’s special and unique because of what we experienced together. I couldn’t have asked for a better group of people to stand by my side tonight. We danced, laughed, and cried together… I don’t think I’ve ever felt more understood. These people ‘get’ me.

Not surprisingly, I screamed every single lyric at the top of my lungs and subsequently lost my voice almost IMMEDATIELY. With that in mind, I suppose a more accurate description would be: I wasn’t so much singing, as I was gasping for the remainder of the show. I literally danced with until I was out of breath. I cried (ok, SOBBED) all of my make-up off (a Long Live/NYD mash-up… are you kidding me?! I FEEL ATTACKED). 

By the end of the night, I resembled a pathetic, overly-emotional, glittery, drowned rat.

and I was living my absolute best life.

Also, I was REALLY proud of our outfits this time around! I think we did a decent job of recreating your Direct TV commercial, with my rainbow two-piece, and Cecil’s interpretation of Olivia Benson dressed as a Caticorn (I can’t say I ever thought I’d use that in a sentence). It consisted of around 8-10 hours total of gluing, painting, and hand-sewing, leading up to the show. Everything turned out awesome, way better than expected. Totally worth the man hours! Wanda hand-made matching these adorable matching t-shirts for her and little Kaden (Big Rep & Little Rep), and Maile constructed a beautiful MASTERPIECE from the mountain LYWMMD outfit- it was freakin’ incredible and HOT!

There was something a bit different about this tour for a couple of reasons:

[The production.] I don’t think I’ve experienced such sensory-overload in my LIFE. The whole time it was like a constant stream of frantic, internal dialogue with a lot of run-on sentences, like, “WHAT IS HAPPENING SHE’S GIVING US CHOREO OMG YAAASSS WERK HONEY IF A MAN TALKS SHIT WE DON'T OWE HIM A DAMN THING OH MY GOD ITS RAINING CONFETTI I MUST COLLECT IT I HOPE THESE MULTI-COLORED FLASHING LIGHTS DON’T GIVE ME AN EPILEPTIC ATTACK WHERE THE F-CK DID THESE GIGANTIC SNAKES COME FROM THERE ARE LITERALLY STAGES EVERYWHERE I’M OVERWHELMED OH SHIT SHES PULLING A SPEAK NOW BY WALKING THROUGH THE CROWD WHAT'S GOING ON OH GOD F-CKING FIREWORKS THESE VOCALS ARE LIT THO I'M SWEATING I’M DEFINITELY GONNA NEED THERAPY AFTER THIS NEW YEARS DAY/LONG LIVE MASH UP IS THAT A FOUNTAIN WHATS HAPPENING OH GOD IT’S REAL WATER AND SHE’S IN THE FOUNTAIN I’M HAVING A 2008 SHOULD’VE SAID NO ACM AWARDS FLASHBACK MOMENT HOLY SH-T MORE F-CKING FIREWORKS SO MUCH PYRO IS THIS EVEN LEGAL” I’ve gotta say, you have BEST band (Paul, Amos and Mike..OGS), vocalists (Eliott and Kamilah…the TALENT), and all the dancers. Every single person on that stage was on FIRE, and their talent, passion, and individual personalities made the night sparkle.

[The fans.] I freaking adore this fan culture. I’ve never met a Swiftie who wasn’t ridiculously friendly, welcoming, and super relatable. The vibe was so positive. I’ve never smiled, waved and taken pictures with so many random strangers in my life. It felt as if we were literally in a different world that day. It felt like home.

[YOU!.]  We need to talk about this major GLO UP you’ve got going on, honey. You exude SO much confidence and you're just pure sunshine. When I think about the way you’ve carried yourself these past couple of years through all of the BS drama, I can’t help but feel damn proud. You’ve successfully converted pain into art, into music. Real music, that’s poignant, raw, and just BAD ASS. Your lyrics continue to foster a special connection you maintain with the audience...a connection that often times breathes life into brokenness.

I felt like the luckiest girl in the entire world tonight. 

This may have been my best concert experience ever, which is actually pretty ironic because:

Unlike Red, I wasn’t in the Pit

I didn’t have VIP seating, like 1989

You weren’t close enough for any potential high fives, waves, or eye contact like I experienced at Speak Now at B-Stage

We were not chosen for Rep Room (or T-Party, Club Red, or Loft 89)

…But, it was OK. It was way more than OK. It was truly a dream.

Listen: Something I've always deeply admired about you is that you make it a priority to maintain a personal relationship with the fans.  It’s clear you want to meet as many of us as possible, and you make a conscious effort to do so. You get to know us as individuals and you CARE, and that means everything us and makes such an impact. I mean, you invite us into your HOME for crying out loud, you walk through massive crowds and give high-fives, you lurk our Instagrams and Tumblrs and interact on social media, and you always make a notable effort to meet as many of us as possible at tour.

However, this can sometimes turn into a bit of a "Catch 22" situation for people. The downside, is that it’s honestly SUPER easy to fall into the “trap” of being consumed with the possibility of meeting you after your shows. Due to the fact that the “selection” process is both intentional, yet also random. To be transparent, it's quite difficult to not obsess with the idea of ‘trying’ to get chosen. I witness this behavior so often, in others and in myself just as much, if not more. Selfishly, I often feel not only jealous, but UPSET when I see photos/read experiences of other fans meeting you. I sometimes feel like the only one who hasn’t yet gotten the opportunity.  It can quickly turn into a mind-game if you're not careful, which has the potential to become toxic if we allow the idea of meeting you to rule supreme over what it's actually about...which is the MUSIC. And, this amazing show you put on for us night after night. And somewhat understandably so, I've witnessed the obsession with being chosen to meet you become a main focus point for a lot of us (including myself a bit!). It's pretty stressful, and can easily dampen or cheapen the concert experience, if you're not careful. As dramatic as this probably sounds, Tumblr (and social media) can be brutal within this fandom, and dare I say ‘cut-throat’ at times. It's easy to get upset watching (what seems like) literally EVERYONE get that opportunity, except you. 

That said, I had a wake-up call/mini-epiphany recently, which manifested while driving home from your show at Midnight on May 22nd with my friends, feeling so amazing and so grateful for what I just experienced…but also a little guilty because I feel like I’ve spent way too much time worrying about the possibility of meeting at you when you come to Seattle, how to get the attention of Taylor Nation, where to find Mama Swift, getting that guitar pick from Papa Swift, and this time was no different. Granted, my intentions are 100% pure and it’s only because you’ve meant so freakin much to me for so many years, and it's almost as if my life won’t be complete until I finally get to tell you in person. That said, there is certainty a valuable lesson to be learned here. I am confident that you and I will come face-to-face one day (hopefully with my Swifie fam!). The stars will align at the exactly the right time, and I will have my moment with you, and it will be SO worth the wait. You can't "force" stuff like this, you know? The privilege of meeting you is almost ‘sacred’ in a sense. At least in my opinion. Anyway, my point is: I refuse to a continue to attempt to “create fate” by attempting to "earn" my worthiness in fandom. It’s not productive, it's not healthy, and it’s not cute.

Alright, this is getting out of hand. I need to wrap this up. 🤣 I’m not sure whether or not you’ve seen any of my throwback photo-posts I posted the week leading up to the show. They definitely explain a lot more about me, and my history being a fan. Either way, I must reiterate how grateful I am to have you in my life, and that support you 100% and will always be here. The amount of hope, joy and comfort you've given me over the past 10+ years is insurmountable, and I'll never be able to repay you for that. And I mean that in the most sincere way. Not a lot of things make me as happy as you make me (especially lately). This experience was the ‘boost’ I needed, I think. And like I said, the relationship I have with my friends/Swiftie Fam is invaluable, and I look forward to making memories with them at your shows in the future. You’ve brought the most random group of people together and created a bond that’s unique, unconditional and unbreakable, and I think that’s so cool.

This was A LOT longer than I originally intended it to be. This escalated quickly. Haha. Thanks for listening. 💗

Don’t read the last page…]

Love you, T

Crystal

@taylorswift

@taylornation

@ceunit

@maileswiftie

[photos]:  1) The whole crew: Cecil, Wanda, Kaeden, Maile and myself at our seats. 2) Kaeden the night before the show. SO EXCITED!! 3) Testing out the Caticorn onesie w/ Cecil 4) Cecil and myself FULLY DECKED and ready to go. 5) Wanda and Kaeden: Big Rep & Lil’ Rep! 6) the girls! Maile, Wanda and Me pre-show 7) Us at the end of the show! And yes, that’s me in the middle..in disbelief, exhausted, sweaty, and a physical and emotional wreck (see also: ‘drowned rat’ description above). 8) All of us after the show literally in a hotel lobby (and glitter on the floor after the party!), waiting for traffic to die down before we headed home.