#this company now drains me enough that I don't even have will to write or draw

[risuola]

I got offered a promotion... it's great, I'll earn more but also I'll be rooting myself deeper into the hellish corporation that is my workspace.

[woundedsoul12]

From our discord writing prompt- Illario and Lucanis post game banter. This also mentions my M!Shadowdragon!Rook and his brother.

I have been writing for the Mercar Trio for awhile and I adore them. I have finally established enough of Rook's story in the Closer series to move on with this

Lucanis sighed as he placed his hand on the door of Illario's study. Once, he almost lived in this wing of the Dellamorte Estate. He and his cousin had been more like brothers, and he longed more than anything to go back to that time. 

He hoped, for his sake, that Rook was right about their plan. 

“Cousin!” Illario was just a little too enthusiastic to see him as he draped across his chair with his feet over the armrest. He looked the picture of perfect ease, though Lucanis could see how his eyes flashed about the room. 

Wants an exit. Just in case.  

He ignored Spite's low growl beside him. The demon had promised to behave. For Rook. But Lucanis kept his hold on his control tight just in case. 

“Illario. You seem well,” he nodded as he took a seat across from his cousin. He wanted to appear non threatening. Friendly maybe. 

You do a bad job. 

Ok so maybe his hand hovering next to the daggers at his thigh was a bit too obvious. 

“Oh come now,” Illario chuckled as he swirled a glass of Antivan Brandy. “I'm sure you didn't come here just to explain pleasantries, cousin.” 

Lucanis hated that knowing look. How Illario could always read him so easily. Could even finish his sentences sometimes. 

“Actually I came to discuss the wedding,” Lucanis began. To his cousin's credit, he simply smiled at the topic. 

“Ah yes. The impending nuptials between Thedas’ most eligible bachelor, and his assassin abomination-” 

Blood and ash. Let Spite have him. 

Lucanis’ hands clenched at Illario's words, but he kept his breathing even. Both to keep Spite calm and himself. 

“Yes, my wedding to Rook,” he just agreed as he didn't want the tension. But he couldn't avoid allowing one dig at his cousin. “And with one Dellamorte wed, the other houses will be curious when our- fallen member will also be settling down.” 

Illario choked on his drink, though cleared his throat and regained his composure. 

“I'm sure the other houses are lining up to take that role,” he chuckled as he leaned back in his chair. “But I'm not interested. In marriage or any sort of arrangement.” 

“Actually,” Lucanis couldn't help but smile as he saw Spite bouncing with glee. Delivering this news was going to be the best part of his day, he decided. “The other houses have turned down all negotiations. From both myself and Caterina.” 

Illario jumped to his feet, face shocked at his cousin's words. Being rejected was a new concept. He was Illario Dellamorte. Men craved him and women pined for him. How dare they- 

“That is why Rook has a plan.” Lucanis was enjoying this way too much. He was reminded of when they were younger. When they would torment each other across the estate. Always in trouble but always having each other's backs. Illario would come to realize this really was what was best for him, in time. 

“I don't want to hear of any plans,” the man spat as he made a dramatic show of slamming his glass on the table beside him. “Whatever you and Rook have cooked up, leave me out of it-”

“Caterina has agreed.” The words were quietly spoken, and the color immediately drained from Illario's face. “She has already made the necessary arrangements with the Viper. You will meet your intended at the wedding. So please, try to behave.” 

A mix of emotions flitted across Illario's face. But he finally settled on a sneer as he placed his hands on his hips. 

“You could at least tell me her name,” he grumbled. 

“His name is Brick. And he is Rook's brother,” Lucanis stated as he stood to leave. He had enough of his cousin's company for one afternoon. And Spite was in way too good of a mood as he watched Illario sink back into the chair. 

Illario ran a frustrated hand through his hair as the door closed behind Lucanis. This was almost as bad as his fall from grace. He was trapped with no choice but to accept the proposal. He would have to cooperate. He wouldn't cross Caterina again, and he wanted to remain in the good graces of House Dellamorte and the other Crows. 

“Mierda!” He took his frustrations out as he threw his drink against the wall. The glass shattered, and he huffed as he racked his brain for ideas. 

But suddenly, it came to him in a flash. 

“I will just have to make him want to break it off,” he mused with a devious grin. Yes, that could work. They would have to accept if this Brick rejected him. 

Brick, what kind of dumb Minrathous name was this? Hopefully he was as unappealing as his name, because Illario hated admitting how lonely his bed had been lately. 

“It will all work out,” he reassured himself. He would just have to make himself unlikable, which seemed to be his specialty lately. 

Now, to set his plan in motion. 

[d6volution]

Hey! I know you've heard this before but the way your write Caine???? Actually mouth drooling omg, you're writing is fantastic,

If it isn't too much trouble, I was reading the drabble with Caine and the affectionate reader and how he's practically willing to drop anything at a moments notice to tend to her. I'm super into that concept omg so how about an idea where they are like mid adventure and the reader is pretty much just super needy throughout the entire adventure and goes to seek out Caine for relief?

Love you, tysm~ 💖

thank you so much. im so glad you like it 🤧💗💗 and of course !

-------

Caine had made a habit out of being by your side almost 24/7, and you absolutely loved it. You adored him and his attention. It was the only thing that made being stuck here worthwhile. As much as Caine loved your company he also thought it would be healthy to have you go on a few adventures alone. Unfortunately you were being somewhat of a brat about it.

"Come now, dear, just for today! You must intact with the other circus members to keep that pretty little head of yours screwed on right!" His voice had that usually charismatic ring to it, but you've been around him long enough to realize that he was becoming a little frustrated as well.

"Don't wanna! Wanna stay with you, Caine!" You sat down right in front of his feet. Refusing to move in an act of protest.

Caine sighed, and if he had a nose, he'd be pinching the bridge of it right now.

He picked you up under your armpits and sat you on his lap. For a moment, you were overjoyed until he shifted the position and made you lay across his lap. You immediately began to squirm.

"Keep still dear, unless you want this to hurt more hmm?" He hummed and rubbed your ass.

"N.. No, m'sorry Caine, I... I'll go on the adventure!"

He brought his hand down on your ass hard and fast and you yelped, clinging onto his pant leg. "Are you sure you'll stop being a brat? I'm only trying to help you dear, and here you are throwing quite the tantrum!" Another smack, then another.

You whined and squirmed, sputtering out apologies as he rubbed your sore ass.

"Good, good! How wonderful that we could see eye to eye." You could feel your panties sticking to your cunt, and that unmistakable feeling of Caine's erection pressed against your leg.

But he opted to ignore it, "Now darling, let's get you up and adam!" He said and helped you to stand correctly, licking your tears off of your cheeks. "Ready, dear?"

He said and nodded, still sniffling a little.

It had been about thirty minutes into the adventure and your cunt was still throbbing from earlier, you knew Caine purposely left you in these soiled underwear on purpose and the thought made your frustrated! He .. he had to take responsibility. Plus you didn't even want to be away from him in the first place.

"If looks could kill, y/n.." Jax muttered, noticing your determined expression. "What's your panties in a bunch, huh?"

"Oh! Jax, i.. it's nothing.. can you help me though, I want to find Caine." You knew he out of all people could find him, one way or another.

"Oh yeah? What's in it for me huh?"

"Jaaxxx.. please!" You whined and tugged at his arm.

"Ugh, fine.. fine." He rolled his eyes , clearly bothered by your whining.

You were desperate, taking the shortcut that Jax pointed out, and you promised to keep it a secret. "C.. Caine..? Caine!" You called out as you burst through the door and into a what looked like a cafe filled of mannequins. Caine and Bubble occupied one of the tables.

Caine's eyes quite literally popped out of his head, "Y/N, what in my name are you doing here!?"

You felt like many eyes were on you, artificial or not it made you flustered. You squirmed a little, your confidence seemed to drain from you.

Caine cleared his throat and everyone went back to their idle conversation as he approached you, "What's the meaning of th—" Oh. He could practically smell you.

"N.. Need you, Caine.. please.. can we leave..?"

"My, my, what am I going to do with you?" He said and easily scooped you up into his arms, "Still leaking from earlier, is your mind that occupied with me, my dear? It seems you're in for another round punishment.. and much more, of course." His voice got low just then.. and you pressed your legs together.

Knowing this would be more satisfying than any adventure ever could.

[gavisuntiedboot]

Blue raspberry (Gavi x Reader)

28 day writing prompt challenge - prompts are here

Day 11: Late night McDonald's run

Warning: mentions/ alluding to eating disorders! Mentions of being scared to eat certain foods! If you're not comfortable please don't read!

"Pablo, I'm here, but they won't let me come into the parking lot because they don't recognize my car, so you're going to need to come up to."

"I'm walking up to you right now. Pull over to the side."

You moved your car from in front of the barrier to wait as close as possible on the side of the road. Despite the fact that it was 9:15pm, there were still about a dozen fans waiting to see the players emerge, hoping to get photos and autographs. You saw Gavi's hooded figure emerge, and he looked for your car. You flashed your lights to notify him where you were, but you notified the fans as well. They ran over and swarmed him, making it almost impossible to get to you. He took a few pictures and signed a few shirts before security intervened, separating him from his loyal supporters.

He got into your car and threw his backpack over his shoulder into the back seat, sighing and sinking into the seat. There was a path for you drive between the fans, and so you left Camp Nou and the flashes of iPhones behind you.

"Great. Now my Ford is going to be all over Twitter. People will want to get pictures with Gavi's chauffer. I'll never have a moment of peace."

He let out a tired laugh and pulled his hood down, finally relaxing as you hit the road.

"First of all, you already stick out for driving this obnoxiously American car in the middle of Spain. And second, why didn't you just tell security you were here to pick me up?"

"Gavi, can you imagine if security just let random girls in if they said they were there to see you? You would have been kidnapped a long time ago."

You rarely ever picked up Gavi. Your relationship was still relatively new, and he didn't want you to be hounded by the press and by people on social media making unfounded and nasty comments. Plus, he usually had a ride. He often arrived and left with Pedri, who was all too happy to have some company on his way to work in the mornings. If not Pedri, then another member of the squad (or even a member of staff) was always happy to make sure he got to and from practice safely (and didn't get snatched by a random fan).

But today, he was just in the worst mindset. It was freezing in Barcelona, and he hated to practice in the cold. As usual, he was slipping and sliding around the field, even more than usual due to the rain of the previous night. He was cold and wet, and he was being constantly critiqued by the coaching staff because he was just not in top form today. To make matters worse, he was starving. He had been following Robert's "healthy diet" advice, but sometimes he got so fixated on not eating the wrong thing that he just forgot to eat altogether. He had finished some weight training and was ready to hit the shower and go home when he got the news from Pedri.

"The Adidas reps are coming over to get me fitted for some new boots. I wont be leaving until 10:30."

Gavi almost cried at the news that he was going to be held at the Camp so late. He was exhausted. He was cold. He wanted to see his girlfriend. And so he swallowed his pride and called you, asking you to rev up the gas-guzzler and pick him up, even if it meant being photographed together.

"Mi corazón, are you okay? You're giving off more distressed vibes than usual."

"Honestly, I don't know," he replied, turning to look at you. "I've just been feeling drained and down. Everything is irritating me and I just want to sit in bed and do nothing."

A moment of silence passed. You didn't know what to say. You understood how Pablo felt: it was hard living up to so much pressure and expectations, and even if it wasn't full-blown depression, it was enough to make you worried. You didn't want these feelings to start interfering with his day-to-day, because you knew that would just make him feel worse. You weren't a therapist, but you wanted to do whatever you could to provide him with a little bit of comfort.

"... do you want to go to McDonald's?"

"What?" He said, looking over at you with his eyebrows stitched together in confusion, like you had asked the question in a different language.

"Well I mean when I've had a shit day I usually find myself in the McDonald's drive-thru. Nothing makes me feel as good as a 9-piece nugget meal and an Oreo McFlurry. But if you just want to go home I can just take you home."

"I... don't even remember the last time I went to McDonald's."

"Are you being serious?"

"Yeah. I eat a lot at the club and have my macros tracked by the nutritionists there. And then usually I'm with the boys and Eric or someone else cooks. And I don't have a car, so it prevents me from coming here for a McChicken whenever I want."

You drove for a few more minutes before turning into the drive through.

"Welcome to McDonald's what can I get for you?"

You placed your order, going a little overboard and getting everything that looked somewhat appealing. You turned to Gavi.

"What do you want?"

"All that food was for you?!"

"Quickly."

"Um... maybe I just get a small fries. I don't want to ruin all the work I've done by pigging out."

You looked at Gavi with wide eyes. It was dawning on you how much he was actually worried about his eating habits for fear of being ridiculed by the club.

"For him can I get a large McChicken meal with a blue raspberry slushie and- M&Ms or Oreo?"

"What?"

"Hurry up Pablo or we'll be here all night. M&Ms or Oreo?"

"But I- fine. Oreo."

"And an Oreo McFlurry. That's all"

You left the speaker, waiting in line to pay, and you looked over at Pablo, whos cheeks were bright red. He was looking directly in front of him, avoiding eye contact with you.

"What's wrong Pablito? You just said you liked McChickens."

"I do amor, that's not the problem." He said, looking at you. You took his hand in yours and laced your fingers together.

"It's just been a long time since I let myself eat this kind of stuff. And I mean I know that one time will be fine but I just... I don't know how to not feel guilty for having fried food for the first time in like a year."

You brought his hand up to your lips and kissed it gently, rubbing the back of it with your thumb.

"Pablo, you guys just won the Spanish Supercup less than a month ago - and you were in top form might I add. I know it's hard to let yourself have simple pleasures, but you deserve to have things that make you happy every now and then. And plus, this meal is probably better for you than two beers."

He smiled widely, leaning over to give you a gentle kiss. You reciprocated, enjoying the feeling of his soft lips against yours until the car behind you honked, causing you both to swiftly pull away.

You moved to the window, pulling out your wallet to pay.

"Corazón, you don't have to pay for the food. I can get it."

"Oh my God Pablo Gavi?"

He had forgotten to pull his hood up, and now the man at the window looked ready to faint. Pablo panicked. He did not want to be photographed in this moment.

"Why don't you get something for him to sign for you?" You asked sweetly, and Gavi squeezed your arm, greatful for your quick thinking. The employee ran off to find something for Gavi to sign.

"I think my card fell in my bag. Pablito, can you open up my McDonald's app on my phone so I can get the reward points?"

The employee returned, hands shaking as he handed you a shirt and a Sharpie for Gavi. The app lit up Gavi's face and just before he gave you the phone, his eyes got wide.

"Bebe, why do you have 7,000 McDonald's points."

".... I'm sad often. Hurry up and sign the shirt."

You got your food and drove back to Pablo's house.

"It's your obligation as a passenger to eat fries out of the bag while they are hot, and occasionally feed some to me." You said playfully. He smirked at you, grabbing some fries and taking a bite.

"Fuck."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing. I just forgot how good fat and salt are."

At Pablo's house, he tried to set the food on the table, but you stopped him, grabbing the bag and skipping over to the couch. You set the food out on the coffee table and dimmed the lights.

"Why do the lights have to be off for us to eat?" Pablo asked, sitting on the couch and putting one arm around you, pulling you close.

"Because it's more freeing. Don't look and hyper-analyze what you're eating, Pablo. Just eat until you're full."

You unwrapped the burger and handed it to Pablo, following quickly with your own food. You put on an episode of your favorite show, and you two just sat and ate and cuddled. After 5 or 6 episodes, the food was cleared, and you and Pablo had situated yourselves on the couch. He was laying in your arms, and you alternated between eating ice cream yourself and feeding him spoonfuls.

"Bebe, I have a question?"

"Yes mi amor?"

"How did you know I was going to like blue raspberry?"

"Because you have the taste buds of a 5 year old, just like me. Why? Did you like it?"

"I loved it. I'm going to go and buy myself one every time I score a goal."

"Can I get in on this deal? I also like slushies."

"Of course mi corazón. How else am I going to get to the McDonald's? You'll be driving."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: Hey y'all! Hope you enjoyed this one. Inspired by my own late night McDonald's run (which actually tragically ended w me spilling half the food on the floor). If you haven't had a blue raspberry slushie from McDonald's (and it's available where you are) go get one. I have met so many athletes who have this mentality around fast food, and so I wanted to give a little bit of a different perspective. Anyways, I've really been enjoying this prompt challenge. I hope you are too. Please leave any comments or feedback here or in my asks, and see y'all later!

[harlotofandraste]

Also I hate the name "burnout" because it is just so absurdly fitting for me :(

I LOVED my job I loved my work so so so freaking much, I enjoyed the responsibilities I felt comfortable with my coworkers, even the higher-ups, I did well, and not even I will deny that I did well, that I was damn great at my job, and I had no problem putting in the work, the hours and routinely worked hours that are not technically legal in Austria and either didn't write them down at all or moved the hours around so they better fit into the legal framework. And I absolutely genuinely was convinced I had found THE job for me. I went home at the end of the day or from events and stuff thinking, how could I be so lucky? How did I find the one field of work where I can thrive with my ADHD brain that struggles in most other work environments, and I am also paid way more than I would have even expected or asked for at my age.

I quite literally burned for this job. I have said that to people, and I FELT it. I did more than I had to, more than I should have because I simply enjoyed it.

But even if I enjoyed most aspects of the job there were of course parts that sucked a lot. And then a kind of an avalance of shit started - a coworker quit (she later told me that the reason was she was dealing with burnout), "company restructuring" (aka letting people go to save costs, and we rely on freelancers to do a lot of things and we started to lose freelancers and couldn't find anyone to replace them, so basically, way more work, and at some point that isn't enjoyable anymore

It hadn't bothered me as much before that I barely had a full weekend. Because I liked the work. But then this year, I barely ever even had a single day completely off in a week, because there was always something and we are simply not enough people for what we are expected to deliver. Yeah that is illegal of course in Austria but if I wrote the hours honestly I would get scolded and told to change the hours, yet if I hadn't worked the hours I would get scolded for not doing the work.

And it started to become extremely draining. I have not been enjoying even the parts of my job that I used to love, where I felt the fire burning for the job, that flame is now simply gone. Stuff that sucked before is unthinkably terrible, everything is agony. I have missed two birthday parties of my friends in september alone because I had to work and that just breaks my heart. I hadn't even realized this yet last week when I had the appointment with my psychiatrist basically begging me to see that I already had burned out but now upon further reflection I see that it is very much also affecting my personal life, like I love cooking for example. Even living on my own I always cooked good, involved meals, but now I can't even remember the last time I cooked anything. It's a small example but it is not the only thing I have noticed. So many activities I used to find joy in are now merely tasks that need to be done.

I don't want to go on like this. I want to feel human again and I would love to be able to do my job like I used to but now everything surrounding it is just pure agony and i so angry that the management is just routinely burning out good people because they can't adequatly fill positions.

My predecessor burned out even more quickly than me, I think I lasted about half her time longer. And I know that this company - this field - is basically a burnout factory. I knew this but I thought I would be strong enough and with the power of many years of therapy behind me i would be fine. I WANTED to be fine and good and a good employee.

so yeah "burnout" is a sickeningly fitting name for my current condition :(

[dentiststoothfairy]

Hello! I see you're on a break, but may I place a request for an Identity V matchup whenever you're up for it? I'm pretty new to the fandom and still getting to know the characters but I'm v curious! I have no preferences for gender or surv/hunter.

I'm an INTJ and enneagram 6w5, if those help.

I'm also an only child to parents who worked a lot to make end's meet, so I'm used to having a lot of space and time to myself. I dont do well with crowds or long social events, but I am very good at adopting myself to socialize with different kinds of people in smaller bursts. I get along with just about everyone I meet, but the social masking means I'm a bit slow to make genuine friendships. I'm VERY loyal to people I can share my quiet decompression time with. On the flip side, I'm impatient with people who intentionally ignore my boundaries because I'm used to the alternative of being alone.

Im an anxious person who doesn't handle heated confrontation well. Regular disagreements are fine, but raised voices set me on edge and I'd rather take time away from someone so we can both cool off before we have a conversation.

Acts of Service is my favorite LL to receive, even just little things like cleaning my glasses for me. (I'm independent, but not having to be makes me feel loved) Physical Touch is probably second, and also probably the one I'm best at giving.

I'm more of a homebody and my main hobbies are reading, writing, and just relaxing to music, but I also enjoy outdoor activities like camping and hiking when I have company. I have a weak spot for low-budget horror and science fiction films! I enjoy trying new foods too--i think I'm a pretty average home cook, but I'm not a picky eater and I do my best ☺️

I like animals, and I have a couple bunnies as pets! They're v well behaved and have free run of the house.

I work in a management role right now because the money is pretty good, but it's draining and my dream is to publish my first book and make that my career!

Thank you in advance! -🐇

I match make you with...

💌 𝐕𝐈𝐂𝐓𝐎𝐑 𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐙 🐶

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

If you need someone to give you gentle encouragment to grow out of your shell or quiet refuge from extended social events. He's your go-to guy.

He's more than happy to be your support.

Your adaptability matches well with his ability to match his attitude to his letters. You both would be able to blend well into the right crowd, but would need a safe haven to recover from such. Unlike common belief, Victor doesn't like people as much as you'd think.

I feel like your struggles to make genuine friends would sort of bring him comfort that he's never been able to tell if certain people would make poor or good friends.

You wouldn't have to worry about Victor pressing your boundaries since he has very similar boundaries to you. He'd understand that sometimes, being on your own is the best thing a person could be.

I hope you like dogs. Because Wick would be pretty excited to meet you haha. Wick is Victor's dog that has been through hell and back with him. So because of that, he's been pretty attached to Victor and that's the only person Victor feels comfortable around.

Honestly? Victor is one of the most chill survivors in the manor. I don't think you'd have to worry about arguments with him. If you ever did argue, I think he'd initially struggle to communicate about it first. It'd be a bit of a climb but if he trusts you enough, you two will be just fine. But, I wouldn't worry about that at all. He's literally just happy to be here.

If you're looking for Acts Of Service as your favorite love language? This boy literally delivers letters because he loves to. He would absolutely do little things like that for you. He would be more than delighted to do small things for you.

He's also such a sweetheart so he'd probably melt at your touch. He'd adore it very much.

Wick requires the pat tax

And with your cooking? I don't imagine he'd be too picky either. BUT he'd adore some Steak Diane if you wouldn't mind 🙏

And since you have bunnies? You'd be great with Wick! Since Wick is also very very well behaved. So much so, that Victor brings Wick into matches and he does exactly what he is told! So, not only would Victor love your buns, but Wick would probably love new friends to play with. (He will be gentle with them I promise)

He's also pretty independent since he acts as a postman. He literally ran into a fire to save Wick, so yeah. He wouldn't be leeching off your absolute girl bossing it. But just know. He will be the first person to read your book. He'll run around it and deliver little advertisements to help get your career off the ground (most likely as a secret) because he knows you're talented <333

[lovings4turn]

[ 🪩 ] who's your money on? - send me a little bit about yourself along with a gender preference and fandom(s) , and i'll ship you with someone n provide a few headcanons too !

pick from any fandom you write for, honestly, i think it's more fun that way

'kay, i'm an introvert which means if i'm not comfortable around people i will be very awkward, VERY, and leaving the house drains me so even when i have fun drinking and partying i'm gonna need weeks of solitude after

i'm a blabber mouth when i'm comfortable, i work in marketing so i'm obviously annoying

i can't cook, and i like girly sim games and pink. my school and college mates got frustrated with me a lot because i never studied and always got the best grades

i like going to new cafes and i always have some sort of beverage with me when working (i work from home thankfully! all on my own no boss but me)

i'm very clumsy and get bruised very easily, i'm 169cm but i lie and say its 170cm because it looks prettier. i say i like books and reading but i havent read regularly since i started college (and i have graduated already in a while so)

im also very politically active, and i show my love mostly with gifts and acts of service, i'm not very good with touch and words of affirmation

oh oh oh i LOVE the freedom you've given me here , lari >:) so many people were running through my mind here , but one definitely came out on top

❤︎ . . . i'd ship you with james potter !

the more and more i read , the more my mind was just screaming james . i think you two would make the perfect pair ! james is more than extroverted enough for the both of you , though he understands the importance of letting you recharge your social battery and doesn't press you to go out constantly . he's more than happy to just chill with you if you need minimal company , and he treasures every single outing with you !

there is nothing james loves more than when you finally get comfortable with him , and never shut up . to him , his favourite sound in the whole world is your voice , so he's more than happy for you to just talk to him about whatever , whenever , for as long as you like , and he'll return your energy !

you don't need to worry about not knowing how to cook - james has got it covered ! it's thanks to euphemia, sure, but james has a few trusty recipes that he's absolutely mastered , so he makes sure to cook for you every now and again to show you he cares

james loves the fact that you work from home , even if he has to restrain himself from being a pest . he'll pop in every hour or so to check how you're doing , often bringing you a new drink if he sees you're running low !

how clumsy you are is something so endearing to james , but he still tsks every time he sees a new bruise on your skin . he gently brushes his thumb over it , looking up at you and asking what the bloody hell you did this time , but he insists on kissing it better every . single . time .

[thephantomcasebook]

'People are looking for this show to fail, no one is expecting season 2 to be good.' Why are so sure of it? Most people online were happy with season 1 and there were many comments on how it redeemed Game of thrones, it's still a mystery to me though, because many scenes would fit seasons 7-8 of GoT, like, Rhaenys breaking the floor with her head, Cole murdering a guest the wedding and getting away with it, etc, the writing was far from perfect, yet people liked it a lot. You criticize the promo, but many loved it as well, Olivia and Emma are popular, twitter and tumblr love them together. If anything, I'd guess WB and HBO would continue to do what they were doing because it clearly worked, people love Rhaenyra and Daemon and team black, they are the main marketing attraction, their social media and the book that were released barely had any pics with the greens, but a lot of Daemon and Rhaenyra.

I know that I go on these epic, Kevin Smith style, long winded rant posts.

But this one will be pretty short.

To Quote Paul Atreides

"Truth is in the streets, not in this parade of Sycophants who flutter around this palace with their meaningless statistics and empty ritural."

Simply put:

Twitter and Tumblr is not real life.

At no point, since their inception, has these sites represented even a majority of the true beliefs, likes, or tastes of the general public. There are many entertainment companies that are finding that out the hard way when their money has drained away trying to impress and appease the relatively small cast of people on these sites compared to the general public.

A majority of people, off tumblr and off Twitter, don't like Olivia Cooke. Some of it is Alicent hate - true. But a lot of it is because she is seen as a smug and patronizing asshole who plays girl activist while lecturing people from her cushy expensive London flat. Emma D'arcy is seen as an aloof grifter who identified as a woman for over 30 years, but once she couldn't break big into entertainment, changed her pronouns, and suddenly got cast. And then used it to be just as insufferable and sexist - entitled is the word used.

People on Tumblr and Twitter eat that shit up, because, they're people just like them. But if you go off the sites, talk to real people - especially people covering media and behind the scenes - you get a completely different story. You have to get out of your own echo chamber and look and investigate a little deeper.

I'll wager with you, right now, that if they pursue the twitter and Tumblr crowd and what they like, this show will be cancelled. If they put Olivia Cooke and Emma D'arcy together in the media tour, they're gonna be behind the eight ball. If they lead with talk of Patriarchy, this show is gonna be cancelled.

You, and they, Nonny, do not have any clue how fucking ugly this could turn on a dime. If they put a foot wrong, if they continue to push social political messages, if they even fuck up, just once, Youtube will excoriate them to the end of time. And unlike Twitter and Tumblr, Youtube is an important platform because a majority of people watch it. And if the Youtubers come for this show, it will be the end of it.

I cannot stress this enough. Warner Brothers is out of money. They are 50 billion dollars in debt. They don't even have the budget to release more than 2-3 movies a year now. Dragons are expensive, battles with dragons are extremely expensive. They have basically cancelled all of the other spin-offs. If this show drops audience below the target, Warner will kill it. They have delayed the show three times now with requests to rewrite the scripts.

This is House of the Dragons last chance.

I'd say I wouldn't gamble it on what Twitter and Tumblr likes.

[harleiquina]

I don't want to go down the easy route of "OP is wrong and is a a*hole" so... let's see.

Maybe what you do, dear asker, is a hobby. An artistic pursuit that gives you joy but you are not in it for the money.

It is fine, I also have them. I decorate things.

But I'm 31. What do I know about life?

What I do know that I have a "blue-collar" job that I hate because I need to create. I am an artist and I would love to have my passion as my job and to be paid for that... because I live in a society that requires you to have money to live and I have a family to support (+ many pets and we all know how demanding those little beasts are).

*A sad violin starts playing while I enter the "read more" link*

I work as an Over the Phone Interpreter. I'm very professional and the topics in the calls do not affect me (trust me some things had made my coworkers cry) still... sitting on my PC with the portal open and with a constant back-to-back flow of calls (now is a little less but I still have them) is devastating to me. I broke down in tears before or after my shift out of the blue, mostly at night so nobody can see me or in the shower for the same reason.

I don't enjoy anything now (mom likes to cook for me, but everything feels the same. I just eat because I'm hungry, not for enjoyment). So yeah... this is taking a toll on me.

My mom was super-concerned when I was doing this piece. Because I put A LOT of detailing in something that was supposed to be just a simple piece of painted wood to stick that broken Christmas' ornament. She loves it, of course... but as soon as I finished I told her "You know that Bettlejuice scene where Delia tells her husband 'I'm an artist, if you don't let me do what I want to this house I'll go mad and drag you down with me'? Well... I feel like that" and her answer was "Yeah, I thought so. That's why I left you alone while you were doing it".

I still do it. Every day from 1PM to 7PM I'm on the line and I add 2 hours of Overtime every time I can. (I used to work 8 hours + OT but due the lack of calls I was asked to reduce my time on the line).

I have a family to support: mom and an aunt. Both of them are over 50 so in my country, Argentina, nobody employs them anymore. Mom used to work in Walmart, she did it for almost 28 years, but due to our never-ending economical crisis they started to close stores and she was fired just like that.

I see this moment as a way to repay her. She feed me, clothed me and paid for my College (I studied Advertising thinking of it as a more profitable career than Scriptwriting... but my aversion to kissing boots got me stuck, so here I am now, making 4dls/hr for an Hondurian company that is one of the many from which a Big Interpretation CompanyTM outsources). So fine... it's fine. Everything is fine.

But my soul... is crushed. And I'm tired... I can't even do anything I want I do not find the will... even if I need to do it. I'm exhausted because my job is draining me... and I feel myself bone-dry.

I love when my friends tell me how they've felt after reading something I wrote. (They are busy now, with not enough time to read, but... ah well).

I love writing. It's MY thing. I enjoy creating stories, putting all the pieces together, the characters, their arcs!! ...

I can create worlds!

Why should I conform myself having an ordinary quiet life?!

I also sort of play the guitar. The time my teacher gave me his friend's 12 string guitar I just fell in love with it... it has such a lovely sound. And those times I play something (in the loneliness of my room because I'm very shy) and by chance mom or my aunt hear me and identify the song... I'm so proud of it!! And I can't even tell you when they like the melody that comes of me just having fun with the strings.

Art puts a smile not just on my face but in my heart. It gives me a purpose.

Why should I destine myself to this darkness that surrounds me and makes me so unhappy when I know that I can thrive and maybe be really good at something I love?

Sitting down and writing isn't less of a job because it is sitting down and writing. As I said, I'm 31, I'm still young (I don't feel it like that but, ah well...) I still have so much to learn and perfect in my writing and the topics that I choose. I started at my 17, and my work then was pityful (some good ideas here and there but really bad executed) and how do I know that? Because I kept on reading anything that I found fascinating, learning from any kind of text, learning from people and their experiences... and even from made-up experiences!

We, artists, draw inspiration from life and this is an endless source. We never receive a diploma that says "Yes NOW you are a writer/musician/dancer/actor/other"... those from College are just a piece of paper with little to no value. The real learning is in the process... in the work...

And how can I get better at what I love when I'm wasting my time in something that I hate? Yes, it puts food on the table, but why can't my writing do the same thing? I do not ask for millions, not even fame, but to get rid of the whole "starving artist" cliché. We shouldn't starve for food, but for knowldege and drive.

I'm sorry Neil, although I love your writing and agree with your opinions on most subjects I have to disagree with you on the writers' strike. No-one should have a more privileged life as a result of being clever and creative. I worked from the age of 15 to the age of 65 in low-paid jobs, taking 1 year off to go to drama school and 3 years off to get a fine art degree. I worked in terrible but necessary jobs, labouring, stacking boxes, unloading trucks, running errands, filing, going to work on a bicycle at all hours of the day and night on shift work in all kinds of weather. Even when I was a student I was still working in part-time cleani8ng jobs and even during periods of unemployment I worked in volunteer jobs for charities and social services.

According to Mensa I have an IQ of 160 and according to Plymouth University I have a BA hons in Fine Art but I cannot accept the idea that writers and other creative people should avoid normal jobs like driving an "Uber" or working in an office/shop/factory/construction site. To accept that idea would be to create a new aristocratic class when we should abolishing the old princes and aristocrats.

What we need, I feel sure, is a redistribution of labour so that everybody who can do so would spend some time each year in blue collar work and everybody who can would get higher education and a chance to make art of one sort or another.

The idea of doing other jobs to supplement writing or drawing shouldn't be seen as a terrible thing, a punishment or a suffering. Sharing the jobs around should be seen as normal.

I mean, I've done my half century of sweat labour and it didn't hurt me too much. I'm retired now and still making art of various kinds and I've never asked anyone to pay me for any art piece I've made. making art, writing, drawing etc. is the fun stuff which we get to do in exchange for the blue collar stuff which puts food on the table.

The worst pop song ever written was Sting/Dire Straits song "Money for Nothing" which ridicules the working class from a position of educational privilege.

So what's my question? My question is: What's wrong with a writer doing other jobs to make ends meet? Sounds perfectly fine to me.

Nothing's wrong with a writer doing other jobs to make ends meet. Writers and artists have been doing that since the dawn of time. Actors too.

But by the same token, there's nothing right about assuming that writing isn't a blue-collar job, or that writers and other people who make art can only make it for love and that thus they need other jobs to subsidise their craft.

I like living in a world in which the people who make the things that make the world worth living in get paid for their work. For me, that includes the people who make films and TV, books, art and music and comics.

Having spent a lot of time on film and TV sets, it's a blue-collar world on set, and everyone is working long and hard to make the shows you love. I'm never going to suggest that the riggers or the gaffers or the make-up team or the focus-pullers should drive ubers in order to have the privilege of being on the set and working there.

Or to put it another way, from the most blue-collar writer I ever knew...

[fluorescentvermin]

Chapter 1

The Beginning of the End - Charlie

Finding a job isn't easy. Finding a good place to work is even harder. I've been on the search for the right job for months, it's been a test of my mental stamina. Journalism isn't what it used to be. Written media these days is mostly celebrity gossip and conspiracy theories. The political climate has become an over-dramatized shit show. It seems as if both sides aren't fit for anyone.

Even with all that, there's one publication that seems to value the truth over gossip. The Neo Journal. I read their articles every day. Not only are their writers eloquent and fluent, but they are one of the only publications talking about the real issues. They're truly a rare gem. I've applied for them on multiple occasions but have yet to receive any word back. I guess my university degree and independent works aren't good enough for them. One day I'll work for the Neo Journal. Maybe I just need one piece that highlights my writing chops. Sadly, I've yet to find the inspiration for that one piece.

My life is pretty boring in my unemployment. I live with my wife, Ella. She's my rock. She's an Editor at a publishing company that specializes in non-fictional work, and she's been supporting us financially. I have self-issued myself the role of house husband, and I quite enjoy it! Even though I want to work, having a clean house and a wife that's properly fed makes me happy.

After taking the stairs to the 17th floor, I search my pockets to look for my key. It was strange though, when I put my key into the lock it wouldn't open.

"Ella. It's Charlie. My key isn’t working" I yell, rapping my knuckles on my front door. I hear movement. Shuffling feet grow louder, approaching the door. After a long day of job searching at the library, I was mentally drained. I looked forward to snuggling up with my wife on the couch and watching a movie.

“Good” Ellas’s voice was muffled by the door and the walls between us, surely, I was mistaken by what I heard.

“Sorry? I didn’t catch that. Can you let me in, please?” I yell again. I shuffle on the spot; my satchel weighed heavy on my shoulder.

“I said good! I changed the locks” Ella shouted through the door.

“I wish you would have told me about that so I could have bought a new key” I yell and mumble at the same time. Ella forgets to tell me things sometimes, but she’s a busy woman so I don’t blame her.

“I don’t have to tell you anything” she yells.

“Ella, honey, I’ve had a long day. Can you please just let me in?” I beg.

"No, I don't think I will" She pouts, or I assume she is.

"Ella, I hear that you’re upset. I don’t know what I have done, but I’ll make it up to you. Open the door so that I can fix it"

“You can’t fix what’s already broken, Charlie”

“Broken? What are you talking about?”

“Our relationship, Charlie. It’s not working out anymore”

“Darling, we can talk about this. Can you let me in? We’ll have some coffee and talk about it. We can figure this out”

"I want a divorce, Charlie!" She shouts. My knees buckle at her words.

"A divorce? What? No! Can you let me in so we can talk?" I plead. I'm taken back by her words. I know things have been rocky but going that far is a bit extreme. We're supposed to be there for each other, and I've tried my hardest to be a good husband. I didn’t have the energy for this right now, my brain was fried. Not to mention the sheer embarrassment of the neighbours hearing our lovers spat.

"NO! YOU DON'T DESERVE TO SEE ME EVER AGAIN!" Ella wails like a banshee. Her voice piercing my ears even through the cover of the door.

"Ella, you're being irrational. Let me in, we'll talk it over. We'll think it through. I get it, you're angry, but we should think about something like that calmly with a clear and level head" I beg. I don't want to be without her. Even with the rollercoaster of emotions she's put me through, I still love her.

"I have thought about it, Charlie. I am level-headed. Our marriage hasn't been working out and I think it's about time we admit to that" She pouts.

"Ella, I made a vow to be there for you in sickness and in health. I have been distracted and I admit to it. I'll do better, I promise" I plead, leaning against the door in my weakness.

"Do you know how many times you've said that, and nothing has happened? I don't believe you will do better honestly" she hisses.

"Ella! God, please! Can we talk about this in the flat? The neighbours can hear everything" I beg, cowering against the door.

"Good! Let the neighbours know that I have a terrible EX-HUSBAND!" Ella screamed.

"Ella! Don’t be like that. Why is this the first time I’m hearing about this?" I ask. This is embarrassing.

"Don't act dumb! I've been telling you for years that I'm unhappy and you've stood by and done nothing! I've tried to fix us, but nothing has worked! I'm exhausted! I can't do it anymore!" Ella sounds so hurt and frustrated. I can't bear to hear her like this. I need to hold her and tell her that it'll all be okay. One day.

"Look, I'm sorry. Okay? We'll go to couple’s therapy. We can work this out" I try to bargain. Yet I'm confused, searching my brain for memories of when Ella would have genuinely told me that she was unhappy. She pouts constantly and judges me at times, sure, but I can't recall a single time she's said anything about trying to mend our relationship.

"Are you not listening to me? It's not WORKING!" Her voice raspy and desperate.

"Ella! This is ridiculous! Let me in!" my face feels hot. I can't tell if I'm angry, sad or mortified. Probably all three.

"No!" She screamed so defiantly.

"It's my home too!"

"Not anymore!"

"You're kicking me out??" I bark. Tears welling in my eyes.

"Yes! You're never allowed in the flat again!"

"Where am I supposed to go? You know I don't have anywhere!"

"You'll figure it out"

"Ella! Let me in!"

"No! I'm done! It's over" She screams, surely her throat hurts just as much as mine.

"What about my stuff? My clothes?" I ask. But she doesn't answer.

"ELLA!" I scream again, knocking on the door feverishly.

"ELLA! LET ME IN! WE CAN TALK ABOUT THIS!” desperate wails followed by desperate knocking. Still no answer. Tears stream down my hot cheeks and I let the sadness take over. Crying turns into a blubber as fat tears roll down my face.

I stood there crying, uncertain of what to do. The sound of a door opening down the hall caught my attention, and a head peeked out.

"Hey, could you keep it down?" The head shouted out.

"Don't worry, I'm leaving" I scream with vitriol before storming out of the building.

<- Prologue | Next Chapter ->

[balkanradfem]

I know that's a really dumb question, but what exactly is female separatism? Is it like building a country just for women, or just avoiding men in general? A clear definition of female separatism would help me understand better a lot of stuff here on radblr

Sorry for my -100 IQ :')

It's not a dumb question at all! And the answer isn't simple, it's actually in many layers, and I'll try my best to explain each one.

Separatism can be described as a desire, intention, and direct action to depend, communicate, interact and bond with males as little as possible, or not at all. For a lot of us, this simply isn't possible, especially not immediately. Lots of women have male family members, friends, children, spouses, relatives, who they cannot just abandon for the political goal, and that's perfectly fine, because we can practice separatism only as much as it is practical, nobody should have to do extreme things that damage their social standing, just for the sake of politics.

So in this situation, separatism would just be to depend on the m*n in your life as little as possible. To have your own income, your own living space, to prioritize interactions with women, to not financially depend on m*n, to work with women, to choose female doctors, cashiers, service workers, mechanics, roommates. This also includes avoiding male-made writings and media, and as much as it's practical, consuming female-made entertainment and education. This is done with the goal of being safer from violence, to form a strong female community and class-consciousness, to be somewhat protected from the brainwashing effects of the male perspective, and to have more free space in your social life to express what you think, how you feel, and what would benefit you, without m*n talking down to you and explaining to you why you're dumb and have to do things the way they think is right. I mean, I'm sure you'll run into this issue with women who parade the male perspective as well, it's not a 100% sure fix every time, but being in a female-company often enough will enforce our class consciousness, even if we don't feel it happening. It will also point out to us just how labour-intensive and draining it is to be in male company, and how unsafe, shut down, and objectified we are in their presence.

Being financially independent and having a strong support system of women would function as a great protection from being trapped in domestic violence and isolated abuse situations, which are very prevalent in the current society and within the heterosexual marriage institution. So this helps us keep safer, together.

Now a stronger layer of separatism would be to go a step further, and start building female-only spaces, and female-only businesses. This also, is something that can be done when possible and practical, and it means female-only gyms, female only bath-houses, buses, trains, grocery stores, companies. This still works under the current system of capitalism, but having a business or a company with only women leading and using it, creates a safer space, with less exploitation, less danger from abuse or harassment, and more benefit to women. There are currently many spaces, organizations, businesses and political powers, that are male only, and they disproportionately benefit m*n. They might employ women, but only to keep them doing the most difficult ground work, and to be underpaid and used as entertainment and a service; they do not benefit women in almost any way, and globally, we're at a great disadvantage economically and politically without owning and benefiting from at least half of businesses existing. Having more female-owned spaces and businesses would tilt the power in our favour, and grant us more political and economical power as well. This is also why all such businesses and spaces are heavily opposed by the males, and are seen as a threat (though they present it as emotionally wounding, they're fighting against a political threat).

For some women, who have been thru extensive abuse and sexual violence by the hands of m*n, this isn't enough, and for us, just being in presence of m*n is draining and difficult, and being aware that we're a part of a system that brought us into this state, and is now trying to depict us as insane and hysterical, feels awful for us. So we want to go another step further, and create spaces where we could live our entire lives without having to interact with m*n. This is completely by our own will, and for our own fulfillment. A few of these spaces already exist, though not on a very large scale.

There's a village in Kenya, named Umoja, where m*n are not allowed to live, though they're allowed to visit, they can never sleep over. The women there work together and create jewelry and ornaments to support themselves and keep themselves independent, so they would not have to suffer thru forced and abusive marriages or sexual violence. I know of another separatist space with lesbians who own several houses on the beach, and they work electronically, so they're safe economically, and can keep the entire area male-free, because it's their private property. I also know of a few separatist spaces where women have taken refuge in nature and organized a way of life that is self-sustainable, they've been regenerating the nature and creating livable spaces in forests and mountains, accepting only other women to live there.

I'm sure there are plenty more, I haven't looked it up in a while, and I believe some are doing this a bit more secretly and aren't interested in being broadcasted online, because this puts them in danger. Being a living proof that women can survive, and happily so, without m*n, creates a hole in their forced perspective. They have convinced us they're somehow necessary, as if we couldn't possibly do without them, and absolutely have to accept the drawbacks of living among them (domestic violence, sexual violence, loss of last names and matrilinear identity, living within an exploitative system, tolerating terrorism, wars, celebrations of violence, damage to the environment, loss of human rights for certain groups, constant danger, constant harassment, objectification, pay gap, loss of independence, pedophilia-dominated entertainment, women being tortured for fun, abuse of female children, homophobia, human trafficking, pornography, life of servitude, life of vigilance, low social value and self-objectification). Once women have established that on their own, they can build stronger community, resolve all big social issues by the mutually benefiting each other, sharing resources and relying on each other for support and survival, it will start looking transparent that we don't exactly need to keep sustaining the male-led world, and that we only do it because they're keeping us in constant fear of violence and retribution if we attempt to defy their rule.

Currently all that is practical for most to do is to avoid and live as independent from m*n as possible, and that in itself is a strong force of separatism, that will benefit women in every way it can. I'm the most extreme kind, who has already lost all her bonds to any male in her life, and I want to go and build a separatist community out in the wild. These communities can function in any way the women inside them decide; for instance, I know there are women longing for childless communities, some women would want to have lesbian-only, or women-attracted only communities, some would like for these communities to be inside of cities, and that's possible too! A woman can obtain enough buildings and space to create an area where only women live, where they have their own grocery stores, gyms, libraries, workplaces, communal spaces, and since it's their own property, they can make the rules and decide whether m*n are allowed to walk in their spaces or not.

The all-female cities or countries are a dream that would only work if we really had limitless resources, and if big majority of women were wanting it. Currently this is not possible or practical, since very few women are in favour of female-only spaces. A lot of backlash to separatism comes just from the idea of these idealistic, utopian cities and countries, because there's fear of women not being able to see m*n anymore, or form relationships or be romantically or sexually fulfilled by m*n. While any of this is already difficult to achieve in male-dominated spaces, it would still be fully possible in separatism, because anyone can leave separatist space at any time, and be in presence of any m*n they want to. Separatist spaces will never force women in, or keep them from getting out, and it will never be hard to simply go out in the male-dominated world again, and do whatever they need to do with m*n.

I actually like the theory presented in the 'Who cooked the last supper' book, where she describes women who lived as the heads of villages, marriage didn't exist, and they simply took to bed any m*n they wanted to, and bore children when they wanted to, which would then be tended to by them and other women in the village. This seems like a very reasonable way for a woman to not have to depend on a m*n to provide, and she has all the support and care she needs after undergoing something as traumatic as pregnancy. Male children were raised, but chased out of villages as they turned adult, and were told to fend for themselves, because they simply weren't useful in the village, because women understood m*n had a greater like for violence and physical assault than women were ready to tolerate in their midst.

I wouldn't want male children to be free to abuse female children, so I'm against keeping them in separatist spaces, and it's something that still needs to be worked around, because it potentially limits the life of separatism to women with male children, so there might be necessary spaces exclusively for women with male children, who still need to be safe from violent husbands, fathers, relatives, bosses, traffickers, and whoever else would wish harm on them and their children. Completely separatist spaces are imagined as safe havens from women who are in danger of abuse, or are running from abuse and seeking refuge. It's also a space imagined to be free of homophobia and safe for lesbians and bisexual women, who would be able to express their attraction freely, without fearing repercussions or violence for the nature of their healthy and normal sexuality.

Of course, this doesn’t mean that separatist life would be ideal, there’s a lot that would have to be figured out, since women too can be mentally unhealthy, abusive, emotionally unwell and in need of more support than others can easily provide, but statistically, overall danger of assault, rape, objectified harassment, terrorism, murder, torture, war, and other life threats, would go down by more than 90%. A lot of us would feel safer in this environment, even with the potential threat of women not responding perfectly, and we would in any case, have the authority to decide what measures are to be taken, and how to minimize and reduce any additional abuse of power. This is not something the current system discourages or reduces.

Separatism is a very broad topic and a lot of the details still need to be discussed! Really only thing the separatist spaces have in common is that they center women, women's safety, survival, women's interests, desires, accommodations. They are systems built to benefit and serve women above all, and everything else is something to be discussed and decided by the group who is building and creating it. Separatism can be 3 lesbians on a farm, it can be 20 women living in a forest or a beach, they decide themselves who they let in, and how life is led in there. Freedom and safety of women are the pillars of separatism, and it's existence can benefit women currently in danger, need of survival resources, and in need of community. It's only controversial because in the current society, there isn't even one system that benefits primarily women at all.

[venomous--fics]

Anon Requested: hello!! can you write something fluffy where reader and eddie both get home from a hard day, and they just enjoy eachothers company doing cutesy stuff to comfort one another? if so, thank youuuu !!

ps. you’re writing is SOOO AMAZINGG i’ve read all of your october fics so far and i love all of them! <3

Day 18!!!

A/n: Coming right up!!! Also, thank you so much! You guys have no idea how much it truly means to hear that you like my stuff!!! And I'm so glad everyone is enjoying the October dealio! I was starting to not feel too sure about it, but to hell with the doubt, we are nearing Halloween! If you guys want to request more festive stuff, be my guest! Not saying you have to, just putting that out there. If that's something you'd like, I'd be more than happy to give it a go!!

You two had, surprisingly enough, met up right at the front door of the complex. You gave each other knowing glances, not saying a word, but still knowing that every thought and feeling was there.

The descent up to your apartment was tiring and somehow made the day worse. Neighbors had their TVs too loud, or that one guy and his guitars was just driving everyone else up a wall. You physically felt the last drops of energy just drain out of your body.

Eddie fumbled with his keys, sighing in frustration. You stepped in and grabbed his hand, helping him unlock the door. He gave you a look of appreciation before stepping inside, dropping his laptop bag and jacket on the floor. Normally, you'd pick them up so he didn't trip over them in the morning, but you're just exhausted. And you don't care.

You both walked to the couch and plopped down on it. Sighs of relief came from both of you, and the silence settled in. You both stared at the tv even though it wasn't on. You focused on the ticking of the clock that hung above the tv.

You glanced up at the clock, only to be punished with the knowledge that you'd been slouching on the couch for twenty minutes already. You two should really get some dinner made, or take a bath. But this? Slacking off on the beat up couch? This was paradise right now.

Or, it was until a loud crinkling noise broke the tranquil trance you were in. You closed your eyes, just to be greeted with something be flicked into your face. You flinched a little and slowly turned your head to look at Eddie.

He looked just as tired as you, but also had a whimsical look on his face. He flicked another small- The hell was it?- Into your face. You shut your eyes out of reflex, and then slowly turned your head down to see what it was that he was flicking at you.

Your hands found two small mini marshmallows. You looked back at Eddie again. He was eating a few, "Power snack."

"They're stale." You replied flatly.

"Okay? And?"

You didn't ask anymore questions. You just accepted the fact that this was happening, eating the two small marshmallows, "This is a good dinner."

"I found a bag of chips on the floor. That's dinner."

"Gross. But share them anyways."

Eddie tossed more marshmallows at you, "Who said I was sharing?"

"I did. I wasn't asking."

Eddie sighed dramatically as he laid his head in your lap, looking up at you, "You know, a please wouldn't kill you."

"It might." You brushed some of the marshmallows into his face, "Plea-"

You slouched the the side a little bit, fake groaning, "I died. I told you it might kill me and it did."

Eddie snorted at your display, quickly rolling off the couch, "Just means that I don't have to share anything."

You slumped over completely on the couch, "But I'm hungry. Feed me."

"If I must," Eddie opened one of the various cupboards, "Are raviolis okay? What about popcorn?"

"You just named an actual food food, and then asked if I wanted a snack food."

"Popcorn can be a dinner."

"Okay then, chef, make them both."

Eddie didn't have to be told twice. Truth was, he wanted the popcorn but he knew you were going to say that that also wasn't a meal. It's made of corn. That's a vegetable. Isn't that enough?

A few minutes pass, and you've accomplished your own personal task of finding the tv remote. It was crammed into the one cushion you didn't think to check. And to no surprise, it wasn't worth it because there was nothing on at this time of night.

"I'm going to call the popcorn an appetizer."

You look over at Eddie as he set a few bowls down, "What's the logic there."

Eddie reclaimed his spot, his head in your lap, "Because I said."

"Of course."

You lovingly rubbed his face as he fiddled with the popcorn. You were still drained, and you were sure he was too, but right now seemed pretty mellow. The idea of a nice bath and then passing out on your guys rickety old mattress sounded like Heaven.

"I call dibs on the first shower." Eddie said.

"No way, you use all the hot water."

"Sounds like a personal problem."

"Yeah, it is." You poked his cheek, "It's called you take too long."

Eddie smiled up at you, almost proud of the fact that he's just like that. He hogs everything. Shower water, soap, the blankets, the snacks, you name it and he's probably added it to his personal hoarding list.

Despite claiming the shower first, neither of you two made it. You weren't sure at what point this happened, but you both just closed your eyes and fell asleep on the couch. Your back was going to make you regret it in the morning.

[myjinri]

jinri can’t help but smile at the kind words. however, she’s never been the type to just accept compliments. “be careful with how much you flatter me. my ego might get so big that i’ll start thinking i could pull off going bald.” even if she thought she could, she would never be daring enough to do so. jinri has an attachment to her hair, which is why it goes relatively untouched throughout various comebacks and concepts, and is why she's contemplating if she wants to cut it any time soon. “it’s something i want to do eventually. i’ll think it over a bit to see when would be a good time. maybe see what’s the next concept for myworld as well before i make that commitment.”

at the question about what she thinking, there’s an uncharacteristic lack of confidence from the songwriter. “i don’t know, maybe something following in the trajectory i left off with my last release? but not quite?” the songwriter pauses, weighing out the different concepts she was playing around with to find the most thought out one. “i was considering doing something around the theme of a letter to my past self. potentially even branching off into self-love in the face of adversity? i haven’t really solidified the theme, but i know i need a break from writing about relationships until i have a new experience. parasite drained all that i could’ve written about my relationships, and i don’t want to become a broken record by releasing songs that are the same but with different titles.” this was one of the very few times she openly admitted that her lyrics were typically based off of real life instances. whatever excuse she makes for the fans was typically what she stuck to, but she felt no need to keep up that image with suji. “yeah, i want whatever i release next to be like a letter to my past self and hopefully it’s something that other people can find comfort from as well. that’s why i brought up the whole hair cutting question because i think it’d be nice to reference past releases as well.  i’m just nervous the company may have a different vision for my music. i barely made it out of omg and ditto with my sanity, but i don’t think they will be too restrictive regarding that. they approved of tinnitus of all my songs to go to true north. i just need to work through all of my ideas and form a solid proposal.” it’s been a while since she drafted up a proposal for a comeback, and it’s something that makes her a little anxious.

jinri snorts, amused by the retort. she should’ve expected something along those lines, but was still pleasantly surprised and pleased by the words. “you know, i don’t need to be employed for me to willingly be in front of a camera that you are operating. now, if it was someone else? a payment would be required for me to even consider it.” jinri was certain that once she called it quits, she'd completely disappear from the limelight, but suji was one of the few she wouldn't mind making a few public appearances for. “go ahead then, i’m not stopping you. the whole drinking show has me not wanting to even touch a bottle, believe it or not.”

jinri dismisses the apology with a small wave. "you don't need to apologize for that. really. i found comfort in seeing that you were at least reading my texts. if i truly felt some type of way about it, we wouldn't be here." jinri hopes that her words provided some reassurance, knowing if the roles were reversed, the texts wouldn't have even been opened. it was not because she had something against suji specifically, it was that she had phases where everything was just ten times harder to do. communicating with people, working, even down to the small things like getting out of bed. given the situation, she really didn’t feel any certain way about suji’s lack of response. "i'm really not in the place to talk about being shitty in regards to responding to texts, so all is forgiven as long as you have forgiven me when it took me a little longer than acceptable to respond.” 

the dancer hums, understanding suji’s sentiments. “okay is a good start. i’d be concerned if you said you were doing great. adagio has you back to working already? it feels like you just got back. boo.” jinri tops off her disapproval with a thumbs down. she can’t say she’s too surprised knowing how fast the industry moves, but she was still shocked. maybe it also partially stung as it reminded her of how inactive she felt as an idol, not having put out anything since january with no word of a new release for myworld in the next few months. sure, she’s been having other activities since then, but she was a performer. jinri needs to be on a stage for her to feel alive. “i’ll keep you to your promise. otherwise i’ll have to come up with something in my project for you to work on that suits you so that we can spend time together without having to worry about our schedules.”

[itsybitsylemonsqueezy]

Hey everyone.

So this is just a life update. I uh... I haven't talked to you all in a very long time I think. And that's probably not great for me, tbh. I'm sorry I've been a bad friend to you all and not stayed in touch, still trying to kick that habit.

Have a face pic for funsies though.

New prescription on those peepers, but they're sadly too snug so I gotta go back and get that fixed. Also I have a little No Face and he is my lovely book case friend. He says hi.

Anyway... what's new?

I work at a new college now, left the old one, doubled my salary and it's still not enough to combat inflation?? Companies stop draining us dry challenge. Stopped teaching :( but I had to make money??? To have family??? Hate that for me, but it's where we are. Wife and I thinking about baby and moving soon, again, and I may even knit a sweater. Yes, that's definitely the most exciting challenge of those three.

Haven't written or read anything in forever :/ Oops. My new job has wild seasons. I do almost nothing during the summer, but I have to come in anyway, but right now I'm Drowninggggg. Don't like that. The work is not hard but sometimes high pressure and sometimes fiddly. Deadlines are real and I hate that. But, new work will pay for an MFA so maybe I ought to do that and get into a proper real life writing circle or something. Feeling the Fraud and Actually No Good At Anything lately. I think I'm overworked, under rested, and under socialized is all. Mental health is unbearable maintenance, y'all. They gotta invent an easier kind.

Also recovering from Bad Cold/vaccine reaction?/body sabotage. Think I worked too long with no rest and body just ragequit for me. Not totally better yet, but much improved.

Won't probably be able to respond until Tuesday night, but I'd like to hear from you. You're good egg. Hope you've reaped something good recently.

[ichigoromi]

𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐤𝐞 𝐮𝐩 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐢𝐦 | 𝐒𝐮𝐧𝐚 𝐑𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐨𝐮 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧 | 𝐇𝐚𝐢𝐤𝐲𝐮𝐮 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧

It's going to be fun~!

Yay! HAHHAHHAHA, Iol I'm sorry.

I promise to write better.

Pairing: Suna Rintarou (timeskip) x fem reader! (she/her)

Genre: Angst, Romance, Fluff

Warning (s): erm...Idts? Maybe miscommunication? Cussing.

Enjoy!

Suna Rintarou

Recently, you and Suna have been having lots of fights, big ones.

Sometimes, you would even leave the apartment and stay at your best friend's house for the night.

The two of you became distant, but Suna never fails to send you a morning text and reminds you to take your meals and a good night text.

You felt really drained with all the fights happening, and the toxic work environment was not working out well for you.

The job paid you well, and you have garnered many connections, but you were ready to quit any time.

But it was taking up your time with Suna.

It all started with petty fights and escalated into you trying to move out since you two kept fighting, and it was not healthy for both of you.

Suna just wanted the weekends with you since he is busy enough during the weekdays, and he just wants to spend some time with you.

However, your work makes you work seven days a week, leaving you no time to spend with Suna.

You're so stressed out that you have lost some weight that it is quite noticeable, which becomes a new topic for you to argue about.

Suna was just worried for you and asked you to quit since it took a toll on your health.

But, this was your dream job that you worked so hard for, and he treated your dream job so nonchalantly, it made you disappointed and upset.

So, when you have a rare day off, and Suna was home too.

He was going to have a nice long talk and relax at home since you two were quite tired, and honestly, he just misses you.

When he thought you had an off day, you were getting dress up for work again.

He asked you if you ever thought about him or even this relationship after you have gotten your dream job.

You paused in your track and frowned.

Was he insinuating that you were not contributing to this relationship? Was this going to be a breakup?

"What are you trying to say? I'm not giving enough? Rintarou, I am working as hard as you for our future. How can you say that I am not giving our relationship a thought? You think I don't care about you? I can't believe you just said that..." You shook your head in disbelief.

Suna tried to hold your hand, but you shrug him off.

"I didn't mean that...Ever since you got this job, you have been working non-stop, and you are neglecting your own health. I am worried about you. Can't you just quit this job?" Oh, it was about that again.

Quit? How can he say it so easily?

"Why do you keep on wanting me to quit? I've worked so hard throughout my university days just to get a position in this company! Suna Rintarou, are you belittling me?" He winced at the usage of the full name.

It seems like he cannot get through to you, and it was upsetting and annoying for him.

"I'm not belittling you! Why can't you listen to me for once?! Is it that hard to spare your weekends? I just want to spend some time with you, but you are so fucking obsessed with your stupid job. Do you even still want this relationship?" He shouted, and you felt your heart broke.

Was that how he felt all this time? You were not worth it?

"So, you wanted to end this relationship, right? Fine! Let's end it. I'm done." You grabbed your bag and walked out of the apartment.

Suna sags down against the wall and sighs deeply. It was all a misunderstanding. He never wanted to break up with you. How could he bear to break up with you when he already prepared a ring to propose to you...

You were a mess. (a/n - yeah damn right. Miscommunication at its finest.)

After leaving the apartment, you took a bus to your family house in the countryside. The city was too much now, and you did not want to face anyone. How did you two end up breaking up? Was it worth breaking your long-time relationship over this career? All these questions ran through your mind as you approach your family home.

Your grandmother was shocked to find you in tears outside the house.

She immediately brings you in, and your parents are in shock to find you at the front door. They let you in, and your mother runs a warm bath for you while your grandmother tries to find out why you suddenly decide to visit them.

You told them that you broke up with Suna and didn't know where to go, so you came home.

While you are back at your home, Suna was calling up your close friends to see if you had stayed over at their place, since that what you always do.

But, you were not at any of their places.

He was slowly getting frustrated and concerned. You have not picked up any of his calls and ignored all of his messages.

Then he called your father, and he informed him that you were back at your family home. Suna explained that he was not trying to break up with you but trying to work things out with you, but it backfired terribly.

Your father told Suna to give you some time and space apart to think, and he would call him back again when it's suitable for him to come and visit you.

At least you were in a safe place, and that was all he cares about.

You took a month off work, it was sudden, but it was a well-deserved break that you needed. Suna never stops contacting you; he sends his usual morning texts, reminders to take your meal regularly, and good night texts.

But you never return his texts.

You knew that it was both your fault, mostly yours, since you were neglecting your relationship. You prioritise your work over Suna, damaging your relationship, one that you two have a strong bond over.

He was the one that you want to spend the rest of your life with.

At your family home, you were getting back the healthy glow and putting on some weight.

And you were still kind of sick.

Your mother knew what was up and bought you numerous test kits. Normally, Suna was the one who keeps track of your cycle, and the last time you two did it was about a month ago.

You try to recount the last time you had your period, but you don't really remember. Your mother left you alone in the bathroom as you did all the tests.

Meanwhile, your father phoned Suna to make his way over.

It was a two-hour drive, and he packs a small bag and makes his way over to your family home.

The ten test kits that you took all came out positive. You let out a sigh and wash your hands before going back to your room to rest. Now, this is getting messier; you broke up with your long-time boyfriend that you still love a lot, and now you are pregnant with his child.

Your life is a mess, and yesterday, you submitted your resignation letter. How will you support your unborn child, and are you even going to tell him about his child?

When you busy thinking about how you would sort out your life, you heard your grandparents and parents welcoming someone very warmly. You ignored it since you were exhausted and lay back down on your bed.

After getting through traffic and getting lost, he finally made it to your family home.

"She's upstairs, in her bedroom. Go and talk to her." They gestured to the second level.

He heads up and found the old signboard in your old room.

Suna tried knocking but did not come to get the door. He knocks once again.

"I'm not hungry! Rin? What are you doing here?" He pulls you into his chest and hugs you tightly. When you were in his arms, you start crying. It's been so long, and his scent felt like home.

"I never wanted to break up with you; I've never thought of it. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Why do you always jump to conclusions before listening to me? I'm serious about us. Will you take me back?" You nodded through your tears, and he was relieved.

"Rin, I also need to apologise. I was being selfish and did not put much effort into you after I got my job. I quit my job, so I'm going to be jobless for a while. Also, I'm pregnant too. Babe, I think we did it without protection, and I forgot to take my birth control that month."

Pregnant?

Oh my gosh.

"You're pregnant?! Wait, is this real? Oh my gosh, don't even need to worry about work; focus on being healthy, okay? I'll work extra hard. I love you so much! After we go back, let's look for a new place, okay?" He was getting excited, and even though it was unplanned, he plans to give your growing baby as much love as he can.

You cup his face and pulls him into a kiss on the lips.

"Thank you. I love you too."

Maybe, all you two needed was to listen to each other.

Yeah! This was kinda a long one, but I finished it! I am writing this in advance as I'm getting vaccinated soon, and I'm kind of scared! Anyways, I hope y'all enjoyed reading this! Thank you for reading!

Stay safe and healthy!

With love,

Rosalie🍓

[memory-hoarder]

22-04-0608463

I know Its been awhile since my last update. I would like to share what happened the couple of months ago when I was away. I took NAPOLCOM last April 2022 and I took it seriously. I studied day (after shift) and night so I can passed and hopefully be patrolwoman in the future. You wouldn't believe my journey just to take the exam. I literally went to a foreign city twice with a different language (Ilongo) for appointment. Travelling alone is not that easy. You have to be vigilant with your belongings and make sure you ask the right person on the streets for some addresses you're not familiar with. You have to plan ahead your expenses - I booked the cheapest pension house and eat affordable foods. It's not easy especially if you're on a tight budget.

I wanna share these experiences, so when I look back on my journey of becoming a patrol woman I can read it and will always be grateful I made a good decision. My sister pushed me to take the NAPOLCOM exam so I can have an option and choose the practical way. I have been working for a BPO company for a couple of years. It was exhausting and I felt I would never grow up plus the salary is not enough for my family but I'm not complaining, it's just nowadays survival cost money. At first I did not consider my sister's opinion and decided to stay a couple of years here at our company but she consistently called me and told me to give it a shot. Even on the day of my online application, she's under pressure to secure my slot, and viola! she succeeded. :)

Now, let's move on to my preparations - I had two months to read my review material. The first week of the month, obviously I struggled to focus and felt like it was too early to make an effort. Then, again my sister showed up and kept on mentioning me in a different group chat where I can read and engage on Q and A. She has the power to cut off my irresponsible self and focus on the good and now I realized If I choose not to listen and follow her I may regret it as of the moment and I am not here writing this stuff. I am grateful for her because she never let go of my hand and believed in me.

I decided not to waste any time and start reviewing. I made a plan so I can track my progress. Reading day and night is helpful, I know we have different ways of studying but It worked for me. Familiarization, answering questions, posting on the wall and watching videos on YouTube are the basic stuff I did to prepare for this exam. I also recommend buying a review material on a legit store, it costs 500 PHP less shipping fee so save money for your future. It will be worth it anyway.

It is also important not to pressure yourself on the process, you can balance it if you choose too. I make sure I can still go out with my friends between my preparations so that it will not drain my energy. Fresh air helped a lot too. Coffee I advised not into caffeine just a small amount and once a week is not bad either. Rest is a must. If you feel like you're sleepy and can no longer bear the information you're reading, sleep and surely you wake up and feel empty, ready for new information. Lastly, the power of 4-5AM. I chose those hours it worked on me.

1 week before the exam, I keep on feeling nervous. I packed my things, made sure I would bring important documents. One day before the exam, I traveled back to Bacolod and headed to Iloilo. I am a bit scared due to bad weather, I don't know how to swim tho. Lol! sometimes I make things on my mind and end up pessimistic. But, God is in control, I arrived safe and sound. It's good to be back at Iloilo. It's no longer foreign because, Mariel was there ready to help and other friends I met during my online appointment. We saw each other again.

I may not share every single detail of my first and second trip. But, It was a rollercoaster ride and it was one of the bravest things I did so far. I'm lucky I went all through it. Not everyone is capable of traveling and wandering.

The night before the exam, I met some of the people I knew during my appointment and we roamed around a bit in the city to find some snacks for tomorrow. I bought bottled water (to lessen the pressure) a piece of chocolate and biscuits.

Before the exam, we lane outside the campus for proper guidance on our individual room assignment. It's a long lane and the weather is not good as well. But we made it inside our assigned classrooms. We met everyone some are familiar faces and some are not. Everyone is silent and you can feel and see the tension and pressure of everyone's faces. Good thing our proctor is funny she makes us calm and everything seems bearable. We prayed together and focused on our goal.

During the exam, I remembered I breathed heavily before I flipped the first page, I don't know maybe it was my own way to release the pressure I felt. I have no strategy to answer the exam but make sure you budget your time allowance. Before passing the papers if you still have a minute make sure you review numbers by numbers just to assure everything is correctly shaded. You do not miss anything from filling out your personal details.

After the exam we gathered together to claim our personal belongings (bags, phone etc.) and it took an hour before I claimed mine due to a number of examinees. We left the university, tired and hungry. We decided to eat our lunch at SM Iloilo and it was a funny experience because we lost on the way. I laughed now, reminiscing about the details.

It is also the day we separate our ways and go home to our own province. I am confident that I will pass the exam. It took 6 months before the results came out.

By GOD's grace I passed the NAPOLCOM. I was too stunned to speak, I waited several minutes before it sank in and was slowly reacting. I'm too grateful and blessed. Every ounce of my effort during my preparation paid off.

I hope by next year I will see myself busy again for PNP application. I hope I can make it and pray that GOD will place me on the right path. It was a dream and goal to passed and GOD believed in me.

I will update you once I wear my dream uniform..