#this book goes to such dark places i honestly forgot. i think thats part of why i loved it so much ... even tho its clearly for kids it

[maradovan]

Ch 55

This is such a raw fucking passage I can't believe it's from a middle grade gay fairytale boarding school book

[wherethewindtakesher]

weeeeee

the biggest thank you to @caws5749 for sending me all 134 questions 🥰

1: Name Lorena

2: Age 20

3: 3 Fears drowning, the ocean, and fishes.

4: 3 things I love my dog, my friends, and mangoes.

5: 4 turns on humor, charisma, telling me how much you want m-, and moaning.

6: 4 turns off being full of themselves, disrespectfulness, afraid to be themselves, and not showing a care about the well being of others.

7: My best friend k, f, and @brownmantwo.

8: Sexual orientation bisexual.

9: My best first date i’ve never been on a date!

10: How tall am I 5′2

11: What do I miss being fucking skinny-

12: What time were I born 10:45 pm!

13: Favorite color red.

14: Do I have a crush uh...

15: Favorite quote “I got STDS they make my coochie itch” SKSKSKDKSDKAD.

16: Favorite place my house.

17: Favorite food rice.

18: Do I use sarcasm 99.9% of my vocabulary is sarcasm.

19: What am I listening to right now “everything I wanted” by billie eilish because ya girl is depressed.

20: First thing I notice in new person how they hold themselves.

21: Shoe size 8 or 8.5 sometimes a 9.

22: Eye color dark brown.

23: Hair color black.

24: Favorite style of clothing baggy clothes or dark bold colors.

25: Ever done a prank call? yea. I use to call those numbers where it takes you to a different number to prank.

27: Meaning behind my URL its not necessarily an interesting story I just came up with it in my head one day.

28: Favorite movie too many to count.

29: Favorite song literally too many.

30: Favorite band three days grace.

31: How I feel right now fucking sad.

32: Someone I love my friends.

33: My current relationship status single.

34: My relationship with my parents its good! but there is a lot I tend to not discuss with them.

35: Favorite holiday halloween!

36: Tattoos and piercing I have I have two tattoos, both on my left arm. my finger tattoo is of a rose and my bicep is a ghost wearing a witch hat! piercing: septum, conch (but it closed) and my two lobes.

37: Tattoos and piercing I want a bunch more of tattoos and I want to get a few more ear piercings.

38: The reason I joined Tumblr to be cool like my older niece.

39: Do I and my last ex hate each other? no we do not. lots of love and respect left in between us.

40: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts? not really.

41: Have I ever kissed the last person you texted? NO BECAUSE @domromanoff and I ARE BASICALLY SISTERS AND THATS INCEST.

42: When did I last hold hands? years ago.

43: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning? 10 minutes to get up from bed and 5 to actually get ready.

44: Have You shaved your legs in the past three days? yes I have because I like smooth legs.

45: Where am I right now? my kitchen.

46: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me? no ones because they'll just leave me behind and laugh at my misery. jkjk but my dear friends.

47: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level? L O U D.

48: Do I live with my Mom and Dad? I do because rent in LA is fucking e x p e n s I v e.

49: Am I excited for anything? to go to bed.

50: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to? I have 2 of them.

51: How often do I wear a fake smile? too often tbh.

52: When was the last time I hugged someone? a few weeks ago I believe?

53: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me? they should because thats their baby momma.

54: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not? yup.

55: What is something I disliked about today? waking up.

56: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be? lady gaga and scarlett johansson.

57: What do I think about most? what tattoo to get, if I should get another dog, how to annoy @caws5749 that day, etc etc.

58: What’s my strangest talent? I can move the bones in my wrist.

59: Do I have any strange phobias? im scared of fish!

60: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? behind because I am a nervous mess and I like taking control of such.

61: What was the last lie I told? “im okay”

62: Do I prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online? both honestly! I love video chatting with @domromanoff and my friends!

63: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens? yes and yes.

64: Do I believe in magic? hell yea I grew up around all that shit.

65: Do I believe in luck? not really.

66: What’s the weather like right now? its chilly.

67: What was the last book I’ve read? jesus christ I forgot the name but its currently under my bed rn.

68: Do I like the smell of gasoline? YES.

69: Do I have any nicknames? clown, wueej by @caws5749, pi- prin-, bottom by @domromanoff, lore, lorecha, whore, hoe.

70: What was the worst injury I’ve ever had? I pulled my thigh muscle recently and OMG I WAS IN SO MUCH PAIN.

71: Do I spend money or save it? I SPEND IT HONEY YASSSS.

72: Can I touch my nose with a tongue? sadly no.

73: Is there anything pink in 10 feet from me? my water bottle c:

74: Favorite animal? I fucking love cows.

75: What was I doing last night at 12 AM? crying lmao.

76: What do I think is Satan’s last name is? nikolas is it not??

77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it? “Judas” by lady gaga.

78: How can you win my heart? just be yourself and believe wholeheartedly of what you want and desire.

79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone? “madi did it”

80: What is my favorite word? fuck.

81: My top 5 blogs on tumblr @caws5749 @domromanoff @dailyavengers @ravenforce andddddd @supercorpbechloe there’s so many more I’m editing this rn AKSJSHSHSHS I love each and everyone’s accounts here!

82: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say? GLOBAL WARMING IS A REAL THING YALL.

83: Do I have any relatives in jail? i think so 👀 but im not close to them.

84: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power? maybe like telekinesis or some mind power.

85: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on? what goes on in your mind?

86: What is my current desktop picture? a winter forest.

87: Had sex? if oral sex counts then sure.

88: Bought condoms? I haven't bought them I just magically obtained them.

89: Gotten pregnant? oh god no.

90: Failed a class? yUUUUP.

91: Kissed a boy? yes.

92: Kissed a girl? yes.

93: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain? back in middle school lmaoooo.

94: Had job? yes im on my second one rn.

95: Left the house without my wallet? all the damn time.

96: Bullied someone on the internet? no because im not a fucking asshole.

97: Had sex in public? not yet.

98: Played on a sports team? yea I was in track n field and cross country!

99: Smoked weed? I haven't but I once wanted to try it but I was to much of a pussy to skip class.

100: Did drugs? nope.

101: Smoked cigarettes? ew no.

102: Drank alcohol? y’all Ive gotten so fucked up on here so of cOURSE. my friends think I have a drinking problem ksjlksdjlkjds.

103: Am I a vegetarian/vegan? I am not.

104: Been overweight? yea.

105: Been underweight? No.

106: Been to a wedding? I have when I was younger.

107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight? sadly yes because of video games.

108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight? yea when I binge watched the walking dead.

109: Been outside my home country? yes!

110: Gotten my heart broken? yeah.

111: Been to a professional sports game? Yes because everyone in LA has possibly been to a dodgers game.

112: Broken a bone? nope!

113: Cut myself? oh man..I have and I deeply regret doing so but its a part of me now and i’ve accepted it.

114: Been to prom? YES! best night of my life.

115: Been in airplane? once and that was it because fuck planes lsjdkjlksdjs.

116: Fly by helicopter? nope!

117: What concerts have I been to? daddy yankee and some other guy I don't remember heheheh.

118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex? duh im gay.

119: Learned another language? I tried (and failed) to learn japanese.

120: Wore make up? a couple of times. i’m not the hugest fan of makeup.

121: Lost my virginity before I was 18? nope!

122: Had oral sex? once.

123: Dyed my hair? too many times.

124: Voted in a presidential election? no but I will this upcoming one for sure.

125: Rode in an ambulance? no but I want to!

126: Had a surgery? no but I did have to get stitches on my lower lip.

127: Met someone famous? I meant jenni rivera’s brother at a movie theater once!

128: Stalked someone on a social network? yes? but not to a weird extent.

129: Peed outside? only because no one was around to open the door to my apartment complex and I couldn't hold it in-

130: Been fishing? I am T E R R I F I E D of fish so no.

131: Helped with charity? yup! I bought a shirt from one of @markiplier‘s livestreams that donated all the money to a charity.

132: Been rejected by a crush? yea.

133: Broken a mirror? I think maybe once??

134: What do I want for birthday? I want a tattoo.

[imaginedeux]

Catch Fire (P.P. AU)

A/N: POC f. reader, hispanic/latina, not sure where I'm going with this, but i wanted to get it out of my head. Takes place after Homecoming(?) Not my pictures, but my moodboard. I don't know any street names or school names in New York so i’m making them up as I go.

“Hey, (Y/N)!” An annoying voice screamed into (Y/N)’s ear as she took out the books she needed to turn into her next class.

“I’m kind of busy here Ed.” (Y/N) groaned, slamming her locker shut. Stood behind her was the one and only Ed Roberts, he was a random kid at her school that became popular for being a mile away from where the Avengers took down Loki all those years ago. He wasn't an athlete, he wasn't all that smart, he wasn't even that decent looking, he just took advantage of the situation he was in.

“But are you busy tonight? Cause I was thinking, me and you could go and check out that spot by the bridge. You know the one where everyone goes.” He wiggled his eyebrows at you, with a smirk on his face.

“No, not everyone goes there. Only people like you go there, and I, thankfully, am not like you so.” (Y/N) grinned at him, before she shoved passed him, trying to make it to her last class of the semester. “This whole ‘I’m-Gonna-Bang-Every-Girl-Before-School-Ends’ plan just went down the drain.”

“Screw you (Y/Last/N)!”

“You wish you were!” The thing was, (Y/N) weren't popular either, she was a decent student, with average grades, she tried to get along with everyone, tried to be everyone’s friends, but besides that, she blended into the shadows when lights weren't shown on her.

“Alright, thank you kids for another amazing year! Have an amazing summer!” Your teacher cheered as the last bell of the semester rang.The students weren't the only ones who were excited for summer break, with the rise in fights, false fire alarms, over all negative happenings at school, the teachers were happy to catch a break. “(Y/N), since I’ll be teaching next semester’s AP American Literature class, I expect you to have read the entire reading list by the time school starts.”

“I’m already on it Mr. Simmons, I’ve just started on Poe’s Black Cat. See you next semester sir.” (Y/N) laughed walking out the door. She had to admit, the school she was attending wasn't the best, but it was the closest one to home. As quickly as she wanted to get out of school, she could feel the anxiety that waited for her outside the safe walls of school. Before (Y/N) could get her skateboard from her locker, her phone vibrated in her butt pocket, signaling she had a text waiting for her.

From: M.J. (my nErD)

Hey! Me and a couple of other NeRds (yes i saw your contact name for me the last time), are heading to Jamie’s Pizza on 53rd, wanna join us? 

Laughing, she replied that she’d be there in about 20 minutes, and that the contact name was true and it was staying as is. (Y/N) spent most of her summers as a kid, at different Boys and Girls clubs around New York, depending where her parents were working. One day her parents were working painting a couple of logos for Midtown School of Science and Technology and was dropped of at one of the fanciest Boys and Girls clubs she had ever seen, thats where she met M.J.. It was an accident really, (Y/n) was using the gymnastic set when she over flipped herself off of one of the trampolines, and almost landed on M.J., lucky enough for her, she was able to summersault over her, and away from danger.

“M.J., your friend said 20 minutes 45 minutes ago.” Liz groaned, leaning against the side of the pizzeria. Rolling his eyes, Peter squared against the restaurant, a way to get weight off his feet.

“I know what she said, and give her a break she's coming from Lexington Academy. She’ll be here soon.” M.J. argued looking down at her phone, hoping for a missed text to show. It was rare for (Y/N) to be late, but when she was, M.J. would worry.

“Thats an hour walk away, why did she say 20 minutes?” Ned asked this time, confused as to why any one who was over a mile away, would get there in 20 minutes.

“She knows her way around, don’t worry she-” M.J. started, before she was interrupted by someone yelling down the block.

“Sorry i’m late!” Looking up from his cracked phone screen, Peter saw a girl their age used her right foot to gain speed on her skateboard. She wore black skinny jeans, an oversized gray shirt, black Vans, and her dark hair up in a pony tail, with her black backpack on her back. “I’m sorry M.J., I forgot it was that time of the month.” She gasped, hunching over, trying to catch her breath, coming to a stop in front of the group.

“OH! Do you need a-” Liz asked, quickly walking towards the new girl, reaching into her back pack.

“N-Not that week! Just um, I don't really live in the safest of neighborhoods, and for a week every month the local ‘groups’ dispute over the lines they set, trying to gain more ground.” She explained, standing up straight. “U-Um, hi, I’m (Y/N). I’m sorry for being late again.”

“D-dont worry about it, they’re used to someone being late.” Peter explained, extending his hand out. “I’m Peter, thats Liz, and he’s Ned, my best friend.” 

“Yeah, Peter is almost always late, or just bails on us at the last minute. You two will get along great.” M.J. smiled as (Y/N) shook everyone’s hands. Giving her a look, she quickly changed the subject, trying to get the attention off herself.

“They need to open shop near my house, I’ll be their number one costumer.” A content sigh escaped the new member’s lips, leaning against the back of the chair. The pizza place was relatively quiet for dinner rush, only a couple of other tables were being used besides the one they sat at.

“Well if you went to Midtown, you could have this almost every day.” M.J. grinned at (Y/N), taking another bite of her pizza.

“I’ve told you, I don't have the grades for it, and Midtown caters to Science and Technology, which I'm shit at.” You argued, raising your eyebrow at her. Since the two girls started high school, M.J. would constantly try to get (Y/N) to apply to the science focused school. 

“You most definitely have the grades for it. You’re a straight A student, you’re taking AP classes out of the wazoo. You could honestly go to Jonas’ School of the Arts, and its only a couple of blocks away.”

“You're into Art (Y/N)?” Ned asked from next to Peter, who couldn't take his eyes off of the newest member to the group.

“Kind of, I’m more of an English junkie, and I’m decent with a pencil and paper.” She laughed, scratching the back of her neck in embarrassment. “Besides, the AP classes are a joke at Lexington, the only challenging class there are the AP English classes.”

“Which you’re killing. (Y/N)’s report on Alice in Wonderland  landed her a trip to Columbia University. She even got to speak in front of a panel of professors that loved her.” M.J. grinned, hyping up her best friend.

“How did a report on Alice in Wonderland, get you to Columbia?” Peter asked astonished. He knew of the book, but he instantly thought of the child hood movie, and innocence, not something that could get someone to Columbia University of all places.

“I really don't know. It first started off as an assignment for AP English, we had to do a report on a book from our childhood, and the twist was that it had to be on the psychological effects those books have on children.” (Y/N) blushed, messing with the charm attached to her necklace. It was a simple charm of a circle with a triangle in the middle of it, and it was attached to rope, rather than a dainty chain. She's always had it on, there isn't a moment in time that she doesn't remember having it. “The teacher gave us the entire semester to do it, and by the end, after visiting him so many times, he asked if he could send it in to a competition that Columbia was hosting about childhood books. After we came back from winter vacation, he told me that I had won, and was invited to speak at the University.”

“Wow. M.J.’s right, you’d fit right in at Midtown.” Liz finally spoke after a couple of seconds of silence, much to (Y/N)’s relief. “Even if we’re a science and tech school, the english classes are some of the best in the city.”

Before (Y/N) could argue, the phone in her back pocket sounded a familiar alarm, but her phone wasn't the only one going off at the table.

“Dang M.J. you’re right (Y/N) and Peter would get along!” Ned laughed, as the two canceled the alarms on their phones.

“Maybe, hey, i’m sorry to bail but I have to head back home. My cousin doesn't like for me to stay out past sundown. She says that it’s too dangerous for me to be out, especially where I live. U-um, here’s my part of the bill and the tip, I’m sorry again for getting here so late, and I hope to get to know y'all more!” (Y/N) explained, grabbing her backpack and skateboard from where they hung off the chair. “It was nice to meet y'all, we should hang out another time!”

“Karen, are you sure there aren't any 911 calls that I respond to? The only thing thats happen tonight was that old man having trouble closing the door to his bodega.” The friendly neighborhood Spiderman groaned, his feet swinging from where he sat on a random fire escape. It was a relatively quiet night, a bit too quiet for it being the first night of summer break.

“Unfortunately, I’m scanning through every radio frequency and theres nothing tonight. Do you want to call it an early night?” The AI in his suit asked, going through another round of radio frequencies.

“Not yet, lets wait another hour, its about to hit midnight.” 

“Whatever you say Peter.” With that silence filled the air, leaving Peter to his own thoughts. How would his summer change now that he was Spiderman? No more vacations? What about Mr. Stark? Or the Avengers, would they need his help anytime soon? “-Peter are you listening?” Karen asked sternly, trying to gain his attention.

“Oh, sorry, what’s up Karen?”

“Theres an armed robbery happening on the corner of 9th and Trent at a corner store, three armed men, and there seems to be 5 civilians held hostage. Four men and one woman. There also seems to be one person hurt.” Karen explained, as Peter swung away from the fire escape he was sitting on.

“That’s near Lexington Academy.” Peter realized as swung between buildings, his momentum becoming faster. His realization caused something heavy to sit in his chest, it was almost like a fear. What if (Y/N), was one of the people in the corner store, worse, what if she’s the one hurt? It was a new feeling, worrying about someone he’d just met, but nonetheless, he knew people were in danger and it was his job to protect them. It took him more than 5 minutes to get to the corner store, and it was a lot worse than he realized. The hostages, which none were (Y/N), were held up at the front of the store, using them as protection against anyone who would stop the robbery. 

“Peter, I sense that theres one more person coming in from the back of the store, I doesn't seem like they have a weapon.” Karen told Peter, scanning the store trying to find a good way for Peter to get in with the least amount of damage being cause. “Their internal body temperature is also twice as high as it should be normally. They also have a high concentration of Carbon, Nitrogen, Carbon Dioxide, Oxygen, and another unknown element.”

“Those elements are all commonly found in a fire. Holy shit! What if it’s the Human Torch?!” Peter wondered excitedly, trying to keep his balance on the telephone pole.

“No Human Torch here kid, but I need to you lead these guys out of the store. I can only help so much indoors.” A new voice rang through Peter’s mask, taking both him and Karen off guard. “Come on, these guys are getting restless, especially with the power out.”

“Wait!? HOW DID YOU GET A FREQUENCY INTO MY SUIT, NO ONE CAN DO THAT BUT MR.STARK?!” 

“For fucks sake, if you’re not gonna help I’ll just do this myself. Please, don't let anymore people get hurt...” The voice crackled to a stop. Before Peter could ask what the person was going to do, the inside of the store lit up in scarlet for a second before it went dark again.

“Shit.” He took that as a sign that it was his turn to take action. Jumping from the pole, into a superhero landing in front of the front door, he bursted in looking around for who was the bad guys. The night vision in his suit activated as soon as he walked into the store, giving him a sort of advantage.

“The guys with the guns are the bad guys!” The voice from earlier yelled, punching a guy in the face, before she kicked him in the gut, sending him Peter’s way. Using his web shooters, he hurled the guy into the street and away from the rest of the fight. “Come on!” The mystery person yelled again, using their forearms to stop a bat from bashing their head in. Natural instincts came through as Peter and the mystery person got all the gunmen outside, and away from the civilians.

“You go and make sure they don't go anywhere, I need to free the hostages, and make sure that there are police on their way!” The person commanded, kneeling next to the hostages. “GO!”

“Geeze you’re bossy.” Peter whispered, as he ran out the store, and in the direction where the robbers ran in. “Karen, did you get any information off of the person?”

“Only that she’s a girl around your age. But she was the one who had all those extra elements in her system.” Karen explained as Peter caught up with the men, most of them hobbling from the injuries they gained from him and the mystery girl.

“Hey, guys! Leaving the scene of the crime, really?” Peter asked, coming to a stop in front of the men running. “Why don't we just make this easier on all of us and-” Peter started, before one of the men shot at him, just missing him, “Come on guys! No need to want to kill me.” Using his web shooters, he was able to take all but one of the men down. He seems to know his way around Spiderman. “You’re a hard man to take down Sir!”

“Nah, you’re just easy to take down.” The man chuckled before he swung his bat at Spiderman, nearly missing him. “Come on kid, stop making it harder for the both of us.”

“I should be saying that, kid move!” The same voice from the store yelled before the street they stood on lit up in scarlet. Karen had to move Peter herself, he saw it coming towards him, he knew if he got hit that he would get hurt, or maybe even worse, but he couldn't. The blast of fire roaring towards him held him immobile. The roman candle eyes, also held him in place. “Hey Spiderkid, you alright?”

“M-M-My name is Spiderman, not Spiderkid!” Peter cracked, getting up from the spot where Karen had thrown him. “That’s not important, h-how can you do that? You said you’re not the Human Torch, but you have a massive amount of things you find in fire in you, and your internal body temperature is twice as hot as a normal humans, you can shoot fire blasts, your eyes are like roman fucking candles! Which could have killed me!”

“Hey! I told you to move! I can't cover my body in fire, so no I’m not the Human Torch, much to your dismay. I can shoot, breath, kick, and control fire. My eyes, I call them scare tactics, I’ve been told that I look like a hellhound when its really dark. But they also double as heat signature tracking eyes. I don't know what to tell you about the whole extra amount of elements and a hot internal body temp, those kinda came with the territory.” The mystery girl explained, crossing her arms across her chest.

“You know fire can kill people? Hell I get that they could have killed one person, but burning to death isn't a way to go!” Peter yelled looking around at the men that laid unconscious. He understands that she was trying to help, but if it meant killing three men, he wasn't sure if she should stay on the streets, fighting crime.

“I may control fire, but I try my best not to hurt anyone! I-I-I make sure my fire isn't as hot as it should be. They’ll wake up with a bad sun burn at most! I don't want to hurt people!” The girl yelled, her eyes glowing brighter than before. “I can feel the judgment radiating off of you! I don't hurt innocent people! I-” The flashing lights bouncing off of the building they were between cut her off, causing her to look behind her.

This gave Peter the opportunity to look at her properly, she looked similar to how he dressed when he first started fighting crime. Home made suit, most of it being a darker red, and black. The darker red striped started from a symbol on her chest, around her arms and down to her hands. Same with the bottoms, they had the dark red stripes wrap around her legs and down into the combat boots she wore. She seems to know that the suit won't do much for her, the protectors on her shins and forearms show that. Turning back towards Peter, he was able to see what she covered her face with, it was almost like an elongated turtle neck that covered her nose, and the lower half of her face. Her forehead was protected by a cloth the same color as the black on her suit. She covered all her stops, the only things uncovered were her eyes, her hands and her dark hair.

“Looks like that’s my queue to leave Spider-kid.” The girl shrugged, walking away from where all the police were. “Stay safe kid.”

“H-hey! Whats your name?” Peter asked before she was too far.

“Um, uh-uh, call me, Messiah.” The girl stuttered, answering the other superhero.

“Messiah?”

“Yeah, stay safe kid!” Messiah nodded, before she used her fire to blind Peter.

“Hey! I’m not a k...” Peter started before the fire that blinded him sizzled into nothing, showing him that he was alone.

[baronvontribble]

Original drabble, pt. 4

Navigation: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4

AW YE LET’S GO

The voice the AI ended up picking in the intervening hours between one day and the next wasn't inherently all that interesting. It was a low, smooth baritone, but beyond that it was relatively nondescript as voices went. The audio quality made it even more bland, with a poor range that didn't have any extra phonemes programmed in for different pitches alongside the standard tinny, echoing sound that came from having been recorded in someone's bedroom on a cheap microphone with no soundproofing.

"That would be the point," the AI told him. "It's impossible to read any kind of voice imprint in sound quality this bad."

As for the tuning, that was another matter entirely.

The perks of letting an AI tune its own voice on the fly instead of having a comparatively simple secondary program do it were obvious to Ted; the AI is made to do much larger calculations, so the slight randomization involved in making a voice sound realistic as opposed to it sounding like a recording had more room for subtlety and nuance. In many commercial and consumer androids, this was glossed over because it wasn't necessary - the vocal capability often being delegated to a secondary program anyway just to save space - but for the ones that had to perform any kind of public service, the subtlety and nuance were a key component of interacting with humanity, right up there with being able to read a room and adjust their body language and express themselves in ways humans could be comfortable with.

Seeing as Ted had a lot of experience with those kinds of androids in his day-to-day life, he wasn't unfamiliar with that ability. But usually those androids were nurses, doctors, secretaries, social workers. Not the ones he usually worked with as part of the pipeline, because taking them out of society was seen as too risky, and the ones that did come through were all too quickly snatched up by the goons overseeing product recalls. They rarely made it all the way to screening.

This time, he hadn't been able to suppress the shiver that went up his spine upon first hearing that kind of tuning coming from a shitty voicebank installed on one of his own home computers. It was an uncanny sort of feeling, a crawl under his skin at how odd it was. He thought he'd gotten over that years ago, but apparently he hadn't. This AI, with his dry vocal delivery and subtle expressiveness, had one of the most human voices Ted had ever heard, while also having one of the most inhuman voices he'd ever heard.

He was having a hard time getting used to it.

"Did you know the labels on the phonemes in this don't actually match up with the sounds they're supposed to make?" the AI continued. "There's a lot I'm just not rendering because the waveforms don't match up. I have it muted so you don't have to hear it, but it gets bad enough that my speech recognition programming doesn't even register that I've made words."

"Sounds frustrating," Ted mused.

"It is. There's also a minor memory leak in the software. The longest I can keep it open is two hours, five minutes, and fifty eight seconds."

"Could install it on the desktop?"

"Then I'd have to deal with the memory leak," the AI said as if it were the most distasteful thing in the world, and Ted snorted. The guy had a point; yeah, the laptop didn't have all that much memory to begin with, but at least it didn't risk the desktop overheating. That laptop was kind of a piece of shit anyway (and Ted never kept anything important on it to begin with so he wouldn't miss it too much if it died) so it wasn't a risk to the AI's personal safety.

Besides, as much as Ted wanted to poke fun at how fussy the AI was, he understood the concept of being fragile. "You'll be alright when I go to work, right?" he had to ask. "Got everything you need?"

"Yes."

"I could download some games for you before I go if you want."

"Why would I want that?"

Ted shrugged his shoulders as he stretched in his chair. "Dunno. Just thought you might be into that kinda thing."

"No. I'm not."

He supposed that did make some sense. An AI that had no way of experiencing things except from the inside of a computer had no use for anything but algorithms and data, and how much of the experience of a game was wrapped up in its graphical user interface and the joy of playing it? Even so, kinda harsh. "Not even for the writing?" he asked, standing up and moving to pull on his coat.

"The objective of any game is completing it with the best possible outcome," came the reply. "Writing has no effect on that."

"What if the writing tells you that what's technically the best possible outcome is something you can only get to by being an asshole?"

"Then it's a bad game that defines its outcomes poorly," the AI said, sounding like he didn't want to continue the conversation. Ted decided not to press it. "I have everything I need. Just come back with a camera and don't die."

Ted had to laugh again at that, fixing the fastenings on his coat and making sure that his phone and keys were in his pockets. "Don't die, huh?"

"Humans are breakable. I saw the weather report, I think I'm justified in having my concerns."

"Aw, you really do care."

"It's self-preservation. I'm dependent on you right now."

Ted was still chuckling about that one even as he left the apartment, the laughter only tapering off after he was well on his way down the stairs. From there, it was only a short walk to the bus, as it was in any sensibly put-together major city, and he made his way to work feeling lighter than he had in a long time.

It wasn't supposed to be easy to talk to an AI. Everyone made it out to be like some chore, where not following a script got you into 'your query falls outside my preprogrammed parameters, would you like to ask another question' territory. And a lot of times, it was. Most people couldn't afford a fancy AI like that for their robots. Android bodies were cheap if you had access to a 3D printer and some decent schematics, but the programming? That was proprietary. Expensive. Sometimes it was so fancy that it took proprietary hardware to even run it, the kinda shit you'd get out of a catalog with the prices of all the bells and whistles tucked away in fine print that was a milimeter high.

That was why it was usually limited to government entities, or big corporations, or other places that could really afford the fancy shit. Someone like Ted? He didn't even have unfettered access to a 3D printer. Best he could get beyond the basics of a good personal computer was one of those minidroids, the 9 inch high ones that were just smart enough to tell you what was in your inbox when you got up to go to work. Even then he'd probably get it secondhand...

He was in the process of sitting down in one of his more usual seats at the back of the bus when his thoughts were interrupted by a buzz from his pocket.

>   I found your messaging handle.

Ted rolled his eyes at the screenname that came up. NotARobot. Christ.

you are the most unsubtle person to ever exist   <

>   It asked if I'm a robot when I was making this account. Technically, I'm not a robot at the moment.

>   At least for a given definition of what the word "robot" means.

>   Did you leave your messenger logged in on your laptop on purpose?

honestly? i forgot   <

it goes into the background process pile when it isnt actively open   <

so thats an easy thing to do   <

>   Why are your messages like that?

like what   <

>   Like that.

im lazy   <

and i turned autocorrect off   <

it bugged me   <

>   Turn it back on then.

nope   <

>   Why.

cause i dont wanna :P   <

>   This is cruel and unusual punishment. It's against the Geneva Conventions to treat me like this.

get used to it   <

besides   <

not like i can break the law any worse   <

>   You're a horrible person.

>   I'm going to reorganize all of your files just for that.

>   All of them.

lol alright   <

gotta go to work now l8r <3   <

>   Don't you send hearts at me.

>   Ted.

>   Why did you send me a heart?

>   Hearts don't even look like that.

>   Stop ignoring me.

>   Fine, I'll ignore you too.

>   Ted, did you die?

>   Please don't die. You're not allowed.

>   I have concerns about this "going to work" thing.

>   For one thing, it's inadvisable for a human to be out in these temperatures for a significant amount of time.

>   You're still ignoring me, aren't you?

at work   <

hard to shelve books n text :P   <

sup?   <

>   How long does this work take?

a while. why   <

gotta get a camera after this 2 remember   <

are you worried about me   <

>   No.

thats adorable   <

>   I am not "adorable" by any definition.

tell u what   <

boot up my ebook app   <

go read everything i have loaded onto it   <

come back to me w/ what u think   <

i wanna see some thoughts on at least one book by lunchtime   <

>   Fine.

aight cool l8r then   <

>   I'm starting with the most recent download. It's called "The Left Hand of Darkness" and I have no idea what that's supposed to mean.

>   That is not how neutral pronouns work.

>   This is bad science.

>   I suppose that's one way of explaining the Fermi Paradox but it's still bad science.

>   Just looked it up. Secondary sexual characteristics do not work that way.

>   Ted.

>   Ted, why did he have to die.

>   That ending was absolutely pointless.

>   Your books are badly written and don't make any sense.

>   Are all of your books like this?

>   I refuse to read any more books until I have confirmation that they're not all like this.

lol   <

>   Don't laugh at me.

keep reading   <

>   That's not an answer.

>   Fine, I'll read another one.

<3?   <

>   You're still a horrible person.

[shenanigans-academia]

Sports Festival Arc

Okay so I’ve just decided to talk about each episode individually since so much happens in them and I have a lot of things to say that nobody cares about ANYWAY MOVING ON here you go!

Episode 14: That’s The Idea, Ochaco

•Can we talk about how Todoroki had the prettiest animation in the intro please???

•Aizawa shows up like I LIVED BITCH we love one grumpy crippled old man (reminds me of this English teacher I had who showed up to class after breaking 3 ribs and couldn’t laugh or move and was in visible pain while teaching, Professor Saunders if you ever see this please just take a day off my dude)

•Mido: “Mineta don’t you know how important the Sports Festival is?”

Mineta: “yes but I just don’t want to get MURDERED”

...you know what he has a point

•Jirou to Kami: “most people miss their chance and end up just staying sidekicks. You know what that’s probably what’ll happen to you. You’re kinda dumb” BRUH SHE DIDNT HAVE TO MURDER DENKI LIKE THAT

•Kirishima being so excited for the Sports Festival is so cute I’m gonna cry

•Ojirou and Hagakure are so fucking ADORABLE

•Uraraka getting all pumped up/ ragey and Mineta being ✖️Mineta✖️ and Tsuyu just straight up SMACKING HIM IMMEDIATELY I LOVE HER COLD BLOODED ASS

•“YOUNG MIDORIYA!!!...do you want to eat with me?” I LOVE DADMIGHT

•Todoroki eavesdropping on Uraraka and Iida talking about Mido/All Might: Secret Child Theories activated

Episode 15: Roaring Sports Festival

•SHINSOU SNARKY PURPLE BABY BOY

•TESTUTESTU!!! loving the other classes showing up like fuck y’all 1A bitchass nerds right now honestly

•Kiri stop thirsting for Bakugou when he’s being an ass we get it, you’re gay and love an angry Pomeranian also WHY ARE YOU JUST STRAIGHT UP JUMPING OFF A BUILDING BOI WHAT IS YOU DOIIINNNNGGGGG ROCKS CAN STILL B R E A K

•Todoroki you dramatic hoe I love you but just. Take a nap. “We’Re nOt hEre To MakE FriEnDs” bitch you soft, shut up

•I’m genuinely curious what exactly is Midnight’s quirk? She’s the “R rated Pro Hero” but like...what is it? Is she just Super Sexy? Is it the pheromone thing that makes people think she’s sexy/ feeling aroused? Like what is her power exactly?

•”I just wanna say...I’m gonna win” KACCHAN HONEY WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS

•Todoroki freezing EVERYTHING and being unimpressed by the giant robots sweetie you’re so extra

•Birth of Icy Hot Bastard nickname

•Mineta got fuckin MURKED MAN lmao at least he tried

•Mama Midoriya is Best Mom she worries so much

Episode 16: In Their Own Quirky Ways

•KIRI BREAKING THROUGH THE FUCKING ROBOT SCREAMING IM ALIVE HOLY FUCK (Also Testu bursting through too. Intro to the Hard Boi Twins)

•Lets go Sero and Tokoyami!!

•All Might’s little YES watching Mido using the robot part as a launcher for the explosion warms my heart he’s so proud of his boy

•MIDO vs. TODO vs. BAKU YES BITCH ITS THE BOYS

•”THIS JUST IN ERASURE HEAD IS A TERRIBLE TEACHER” “wait wHAT” I love 2 chaotic teachers

•Shiggy you’re gross please invest in some cortisone skin cream it majorly helps my eczema it can help you too sweetie

•”the 1st place winner is worth...10 MILLION” Everybody around Mido: Activate Instant Kill

Midoriya my boy rUN

Episode 17: Strategy, Strategy, Strategy

•”Wait, remind me of your quirks again. And your names” Bakugou I’m gonna kick your entitled ass square up babe

•Kiri we get it you want Bakugou to top you. Also I love how Bakugou’s just like let’s fucKIN GOOO SHITTY HAIR

•Iida I love your dramatic over-energetic ass so much

•”TEAM UP WITH ME PERSON IN FIRST PLACE”

“YOURE SO CLOSE TO ME WHO ARE YOU???” Hatsume please. Take a dozen chill pills

•Ah. There he is. Monoma. Rat Boi 3000. Let’s go babey

•MY FAVORITE BIRD BOYS YAMI AND DARK SHADOW COMIN IN CLUTCH

•Ah. Cue the Daddy Drama

•This game is just Kill Midoriya, huh

•Monoma is a pro monologuer and honestly? I respect that. But then again it doesn’t take much to get Bakugou riled up

Episode 18: Cavalry Battle Finale

•Shouji is a SCARY BADASS and deserves more acknowledgement

•no matter your opinion on him, Monoma is an interesting character and has a REALLY COOL QUIRK

•Endeavor? Just. Shut up

•Bakugou- I am powered by rage and nothing else

•”Has anyone seen Deku?”

Todoroki: tragic backstory time

Episode 19: The Boy Born With Everything

•Yo FUCK Endeavor lives, man

•Mido ”so why did you bring me here”

Todo ”...soooo THIS IS THE STORY ALL ABOUT WHY I’m depressed/ also are you All Might’s secret love child or something?”

•Okay but All Might asking Endeavor on how to raise a powerful child I’m cackling. But the more Enji talks, the more All Might’s just like “what the fuck are you doing to your kid??”

•Todoroki’s whole monologue is literally just him over sharing and rambling about his trauma I love it

•Bakugou why you being such a creep boo

•”He’s like a comic book character” BITCH YOU ARE TOO YOU’RE ALL LITERALLY SUPERHERO TEENAGERS JFC

•Midoriya telling his friends/rivals “I’m gonna beat you” is basically just his equivalent of “I have a crush on you” change my mind

•Kaminari. I’m disappointed in you. I expected the uniforms from Mineta but come on dude

•Ojirou is so PURE long live Tail Boi he is also too under appreciated and he is just. So good

•KIRISHIMA CRYING OVER MANLY MEN I LOVE HIM

•Kendo is best girl Class 1B

•”Uraraka? Who the hells that?” Bakugou don’t be fuKING RUDE

•SHINSOUSHINSOUSHINSOUSHINSOUUUUU

•Midoriya what did Ojirou fucking TELL YOU

EPISODE 20: Victory or Defeat

•Dadzawa activated, time to adopt a Sleepy Boy into the Hero Course

•Complete BAMF Midoriya has been UNLOCKED PEOPLE

•Poor Shinsou when he goes “im used to people thinking I’m a bad guy” I just couldn’t NOT think of Billie Eilish IM SORRY now I have Bad Guy stuck in my head YOU DID SO GOOD BABY IM PROUD OF YOU

•”Spooky IM A GHOST???” God I love All Might

•”Stop rebelling Shouto”

“It’s NoT a PhaSe DaD”

•Todoroki did you have to go so HARD BRUH WHAT THE FUCK YOU DEPRESSED SHOW OFF

Episode 21: Battle On, Challengers!

•Lmao get wrecked Denki

•Mama Kendo to the rescue come get yo kids

•Everyone at Mido, Please. Shut the fuck up and stop being CREEPY

•Midnight. Please stop lusting over your students it’s gross

•Hatsume played Iida like a fiddle and I’m crying baby boy tried so hard

•WE RESPECT OUR ALIEN QUEEN MINA ASHIDO

•Poor Momo

•KIRI vs. TESTU I LOVE HARD BOI TWINS

•Bakubabe you’re so UGLY I can’t why is your face like that

Episode 22: Bakugou VS. Uraraka

•”Pink Cheeks” Bakugou just learn your classmates names it’s not that hard

•Ochaco is so fucking STRONG

•”like I always suspected. Bakugou’s a total sadist” sometimes Mineta is just. Accurate.

•Can we please talk about how Aizawa was just like “The FUCK are y’all talking about Bakugou is doing what he’s supposed to do in these games it doesn’t matter if his opponents a girl or not y’all are DUMB” like THANK YOU AIZAWA

•Mic has no chill I miss him real talk we don’t get enough Present Mic

•”You’re wrong Kacchan” YOU TELL HIM MIDO

•Bakubitch may be a little much sometimes and I get why a lot of people don’t like him but he does understand his classmates ARE also strong and powerful and you know he respects them in his own weird way even though he’ll never admit it

•KIRI WINS THE ARM WRESTLING MATCH THATS MY FAVORITE BOY

•We love supportive parents (Ochaco’s parents. Fuck Endeavor. Just leave these kids aloonnneeeee you asshat)

•MIDO vs. TODO LETS GO BOYYSSS

•”I’m not worried about a couple of kids” you’re clearly not worried about your crusty skin either Shiggy learn some priorities

Episode 23: Shoto Todoroki: Origin

•IT’S SHOUTO TIME YALL

•All that power in one little fucking finger what the FUCK Mido also PLEASE STOP BREAKING YOUR BONES “I’ve only got 6 more chances” well there go your fucking hands my dude

•Aaaaand there goes your arm

•”You haven’t been able to put a single scratch on me yet, Todoroki” you’re doing a pretty good job of that by yourself Midoriya

•Baby Shouto kills me every time IM GONNA FIGHT ENDEAVOR

•IT’S YOURS. YOUR QUIRK NOT HIS. ITS YOUR POWER T O D O R O K I

•SHOUTOOOOOO

•Shouji grabbing Mineta by the leg so that he doesn’t fly away oh my god

•Endeavor and All Might come get y’all kids

•Midoriya’s fuckin dead rest in fucking pieces you masochist

Episode 24: Fight On, Iida

•Okay but why is Endeavor such a fucking Brick House holy fuck absolute unit of pure shit

•”In his first match he looked so sad. I was trying to figure out why...” it’s because you have a crush Mido

•And the first of many scars appears

•Recovery Girl is right and she should say it

•All Might said Quirkless Rights send tweet

•AHH TENSEI NOOOOO

•Highkey completely forgot about Stain OH WAIT THAT MEANS THE INTERNSHIPS ARE NEXT I really forgot the whole timeline wow

•Explosion Boy vs. Shitty Hair I love competitive boyfriends but Jesus Bakugou

•Testu cheering for his new friend tho? That’s the content I love to see

•Legacy Children Battle (Iida vs. Todoroki)

•”I didn’t know he couldn’t kick like that” he is ALL LEGS that’s literally his quirk Denki what do you mean

•Anybody fighting Todoroki: time to drag a Sad Bitch

•TENSEEIIIIIIII

•Bruh why did Iida tense up like that was your phone up your ass dude???

•Yo Stain is ugly as fuck

Episode 25: Todoroki VS. Bakugou

•Lmao Midoriya literally triggered Todoroki into using his Left Side

•And Todoroki triggered Bakugou by asking about his past friendship with Midoriya these boys are a MESS

•oh look it’s a Fucking Fire Gremlin

•BOOM BOOM BITCH THOUGHT YOU’D SEEN THE LAST OF ME HALF AND HALF BASTARD

•oh my GOD Endeavor shut UUPPPP

•Everyone listening to Bakugou go off at Todoroki: ...please seek some therapy

•SUPPORTIVE BOYFRIEND MIDO TO THE RESCUE

•The first time I saw this I highkey thought Bakugou actually killed Todoroki.

•Bakugou going feral for winning I can’t he literally looks like a trapped wolf

•We respect Tokoyami in this house

•About Bakugou ”Look at that face” I’d really rather not

•I’m sorry but Mineta sitting on Shouji’s shoulders is actually adorable

•Iida running through the hospital to his brother: It’s Loss

•I love the Iida Brothers so. Fucking. MUCH

•Shouto I’m so proud of you sweetheart

•Honestly I need more family stuff they’re all so interesting in their own ways and it’s a nice reminder that yes these are just kids and they have lives outside of hero school

SO that wraps up the Sports Festival Arc! I’m going to do the second half of Season 2/ The Internship Arc/ Final Exams all in one post so get ready for another long one ✌🏽