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a-lone-echoviolet · 1 year ago

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Ok i was gonna finish this before posting any info but no one knows me enough and i dont have free time rn

Plus i really wanna talk about thiss

So i have an AU im working on called ‘Booktale’ (original wow)

I have a story planned out, character info and stuff but school and exhaustion keeps getting in the way

So instead of letting it collect dust like i normally let it do, imma show you guys some stuff about it!

Character designs and some general info! (that i was able to sketch out)✨

Here are the ones ive sketched out! I havent gotten to asgore , gaster or muffet yet tho :((

-Asterisk (frisk)

- ambrovert

- Gender fluid

- Soul is perseverance

- Best friends with chara

- Reads: fairlytales,mythical books,urban legends,and adventure books

-Character (chara)

- Introverted

- Gender fluid

- Soul was determination

- Best friends with frisk

- Their soul was put in a container before breaking completely

- Their determination was strong enough to keep them as a ghost that is stuck underground, only able to observe everyone go by with their lives without them

- Mostly a guide for frisk

-Symbolism(Flowey)

- Flowey is an Anemone flower, it symbolizes death

- Reads: ######s older logs, history(doesn’t read often)

- Knows about the multiverse theory but is unsure if it’s true

- Hes great at acting all sweet and nice

-Moral(Asriel)

- Extroverted

- Reads: kids books, fairytales, art books

- Always wanted to be a hero

-Exposition(toriel)

- Loves to cook and bake

- Favorite thing to bake: pies and cupcakes

- When exiting the ruins, instead of wanting to force you stay, she will test if you truly are strong enough to leave, to be on your own, and basically teaches you how to actually fight

- Despite being so kind and motherly <3 she can put up a good fight [if she needs to]

-Script(sans)

- ambrovert (hes ok with talking with everyone, but he is a bit ackward when making friends [mainly cuz hes both kinda excited and shy to meet people and doesn’t know what to say)

- Reads: science books, jokes books, ######’s old log books, fansty books (almost every type but mostly reads these types)

- Spars with papyrus, to both help paps train and to let sans get out of the house and use his magic more

- Works in the library

- Not as lazy as OG, rather is just more layed back and is actually willing to do physical work

- Makes puns and jokes but his favorite ones are definitely the ones about magic (and dark humor)

- Best friends with alphys

- He helps alphys in her work (and before, also ######)

- Knows about the multiverse and wants to travel through and know the different versions of him and others, and all the stories that are different from his

Plot (papyrus)

- Extrovert

- Reads: cook books, action books, Fantasy books and puzzelbooks

- despite sans not being as lazy as Classic, papyrus is more responsible in this AU

- Hes part of the royal gaurd! Being 2nd in command

- he acts before he really thinks, it has its pros and cons, being able to react fast to save anyone in danger

- Hes a great cook! and does cooking hang outs with undyne(undyne adding the fun and action while papyrus makes sure its edible and tastes good)

- His favorite thing to cook is lasagna

- He’s already quite popular and loved but it doesn’t matter so much to him, the love from his friends and bro are enough (tho he does love the attention)

-ellipsis (alphys)

- Shy ambrovert(shes ok with talking to a big public crowd, but talking one-on-one/ face-to-face, She gets real shy)

- She seems shy at first, but once you get to know her, she’s quite a chatterbox

- She knows how to be calm, collected, serious and calculated when needed

- She used to be friends with ######, because they used to be Co-workers (‘But who is ######? Ive always worked alone’)

- Reads: Manga, Romance novels, Science books, and ######’s old logs(for research)

-conflict(undyne)

- Ambrovert

- Leader of the royal guard

- She’s great at healing physical wounds and serious physical damages

- She’s a real smack talker (she can practically roast anyone if she so pleased)

- Even tho she’s good at trash talking, she’s just great with words in general( whether it be advice or confessingherfeelings)

- hiatus(napstablook)

- shy introvert

- He is a writer

- He never finishes any of his books (but he always leaves the end of every chapter open ended

- He enjoys writing angst and ventish books

- He’s anonymous online and no one knows him in real life

- He’s a well know and loved author (even if his books are unfinished)

Typewriter (mettaton)

- Genderfluid

- Extrovert

- Is a host of a talk show/interview show/drama show (they also are a news anchor)

- Their very protective over anyone close (especially alphys) and it takes a while to truly get on their good side

- They can be quite pushy when it comes to questions, even when the person seems uncomfortable (however they do back down after they’ve realized they pushed to far)

- You can catch them snooping around the lab for some ‘secrets’ (tho he could never find anything serious, just alphys’s anime collection of anime)

- He isn’t mean but he is quite cocky

(The ones I haven’t Designed yet)

-Rhyme (Muffet)

- Shy extrovert

- Mute by choice (tho whenever she does talk, she often rhymes)

- Reads: baking books, Anything with fluff, romance, fantasy, and horror

- She knows ASL

- Very sweet and friendly. however, can be hostile if you hurt spiders, her pet, anyone who is defenceless, or when needed

-ɱɪșșɪɳɠ fɪʟɝ(ɠɐȘ┳ɵʁ)

- extrovert

- A very smart guy with a great sense of humor (hes the one who got sans into puns)

- He knows ASL

- He used to be great friends with Asgore (and tori),Sans and alphys

- He isn’t a skeleton, he is actually more of blob of matter

- He can shape shift, however he cannot change his head or hands and he can’t change colors (so he stays white and black)

- Before he entered the Void, he took the shape of a tall slender human. Some mistook him for a skeleton because of his human like shape and white form. Tho when he entered the void it became harder to hold any shape other than a blob

-Resolution (king asgore)

*(i havent made any info on him just yet :(( )

#echo-violet rambles #violetdrawings #undertale #undertale au #Booktale #utmv #utmv au #utmv oc #another undertale au? omfg #undertale fandom #undertale alternate universe #it actually started because of an ink battle i saw on yt 6 years ago #it was just gonna me sans at first but it branched out #idk.. even if i flesh it out i feel like it will flop and i’ll just a a drop of water in the sea #its fun tho :)#i wanna have fun with you guyss😭😭#plss everyones AUs are so cool

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rosekasa · 8 months ago

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👄🌷🙌 for the writer asks?

helo mar 🥺🥺

👄 Your OTP are having their first kiss. What song do you imagine is playing?

oh my god. listen. ive had this recurring daydream while listening to best friends by 5sos of ladynoir at a concert together and just feeling so much love for each other while listening to the lyrics of this song and then at the last bit of the song they're like oh. OH. you are my best friend. and i love you. and then they kiss. okay. this is a daydream i have no idea how to express in a fic nor in art so it just circles around my brain like a mosquito.

🌷What's one of your fics that isn't as popular, but you hold dear?

answered this here before but hmmm. other than ya'aburnee... i want to say when things were good but i dont think that's fair because it's still a wip and also i havent updated it in. a year. ahdjsk. but i do hold that fic very dear to me. in my head it is complete and everyone cheers

🙌What's a line or paragraph of yours that you're proud of?

answered this here before as well!! i shared a snippet of this before but edited it a little more since then -- it's for a fic where adrienette never met as civilians.... until they hook up post hawk moth defeat and realise they're both friends of alya and nino's. and now need to babysit their daughters

��Are you close with your niece?” she asks.

The question catches him off guard. He feels that cocooning inside of him, the shell sliding back to its natural place over his words, the shell he’d left discarded while they’d been speaking. Does he want to tell her about Marlena and Maryam, a girl who, at the end of the day, he doesn’t know all that well? It’s a protectiveness that even Nino makes fun of him for, telling him that he’s even worse than his jaddah, who smeared inky kohl in the twins’ two-month old eyes, tied blue and white talismans around their wrists, fondly scolded anyone in their vicinity for not following every compliment with mashallah.

fic writer asks;;

#ask

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octoxicash · 13 days ago

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abandoning down all my twt accs for the forseeable future for real now, wiping my public accs art too sometime today

some thoughts on it bc i feel a bit emotional abt it? is that stupid? over twt?? . idk give me better things to think abt or draw in my inbox or smthn

my OctoXicAsh twt acc was literally my first acc under that name, ig besides my Splatoon 2 acc where i adopted it. like before that it was shit like. CattyKat or smthn. i know ShadowKat or UltimateKat was one at some point. that user is probably still out there somewhere on League or smthn. stupid shit shit like that but not ME yknow?. OctoXic / OtoXicAsh was like my first For Real Me usernames ever and obviously i still use it to this day. so that acc feels special to me ig

it was my first social media platform too (not counting Pinterest bc i didnt use it as a social thing and still dont) and i met my bestest of friends and my now boyfriend too thru the dsmp/mcyt boom in 2021. id say that was my first truely interactive fandom which is an cringeass shit to say at my grown age but my families were too poor to afford a phone for me til i was like 16/17 and before that i just,, wasnt a very adventurous kid on the computer. 2021 jump into twt and fanart was my first step outside of my own bubble, and during the pandemic it became a lifeline. and like. Elon buying twt sealed its grave, there was no doubt abt it but i was def one of those "i go down w my ship" people bc thats STILL my biggest acc by a LONG SHOT and i had made WAY too many great memories and friends to let it go. up until literally today, my priv twt OctoIsYelling is STILL essentially a massive groupchat for me an my friends in an acc form, interactive and communicative while still letting me be in my own page. its better than insta or tumblr in that sense and it was PERFECT before it went to shit

but now the site genuinely barely functions man. its slow and laggy and reloads constantly and eats my battery worse than SKY COTL. AN ACHEIVEMENT. the app just refuses to work at all if i have my phone plugged in for whatever reason and idk how to fix it. i thought it was a me problem for so long until 1 post talking abt it changed everything. like it GENUINELY DOESNT WORK. and it SUCKS. its plauged with adds for a subscription that no one reasonable would pay for and straight up hard alt-right politics. the bots are outrageous like its sooo bad its so bad i havent opened my dms on public acc in at least a yr. sorry if anyone tried to get ahold of me. the algorithm that used to be like at least half decent is now ALL doom and bait and SHIT, its not even rlly worth it to try n cultivate ur spaces now bc no matter what shit u dont want is being pushed in ur face. the transphobia is so unbelievably bad, and while ive done my best to fix my tl its still so ass. THEY TOOK AWAY TWT CIRCLES MY BEST FRIEND 💔💔💔💔 I USED TO USE THAT FOR SHOWING OFF ART FOR MY FRIENDS TO MY OTHER FRIENDS WITHOUT THE ONE WHO ITS FOR SEEING💔💔💔💔💔💔

despite all that keeps going wrong or being fucked over i still held on for so long but i just CANT in right mind stay on the site any longer when its actively feeding its generative ai. ive been small enough and lucky enough to where no one has targeted me and used my shit (that i know of) but now its completely unavoidable and its UPSETTING

i want my big friend gc that was my web of oomfs and moots back. bluesky has hope for me but theres no priv accs and im not comfortable enough to air out every thought i have publicly. idk when privs r coming there but i hope its soon :( i miss old twt so much and i only caught glimpses of it before it was bought out. im so thankful for my time there but i cant help but feel hurt yknow?

idk if anyone else understands me rlly bc ppl have just been so frustrated w the site/app and the cons have def been outweighing the pros, but i still loved my time there. i hope im making sense. it sucks. it feels too personal. thats THE OctoXicAsh and OctoIsYelling accs. that was essentially my journal. :(

i dont have the heart to deactivate my accs esp w the load of history i have on them i RLLY dont want it gone, but ill be wiping my art from my art acc and ceasing all activity on them indefinitely. probably forever. hell.

thank u for reading all that if u did. im feeling sooo fine abt everything in my life rn. everything is falling to peices lately but were sooo fine. we ball so hard

#octo is yelling #sorry if this is a mess im not editing this shit man. essay on being parasocial to a website. fuck this shit #i feel like its dumb to be attached to a website like this esp TWITTER of all places but whatever ig. we ball #like this is rlly dumb problem to have like its LITERALLY twitter. come on. but huggebbbennnn :(#is this a vent. idk maybe? idk man #we ball

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thekuraning · 8 months ago

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Fic ask

4, 13, 20!

HELLO MY FAVORITE PROFESSOR ELM STAN THANK U FOR THE MEMES!!! hey actually these are all ones i havent thought about so made me put on my THINKIN CAP. and hey actually actually this got really long really fast so im PUTTING IT UNDER A READ MORE!!!

4. a story idea you haven't written yet

Ok so like. I've got these two ideas kicking around in my head from time to time that I'm like. Still kind of workshopping. One is a fanfic and one is an original fic. But basically I've had in my head since forever (10 years of Big Thinking) about a big Digimon sort of odyssey that originally started as a Pokemon x Digimon crossover where I took the Rocket executives and shoved them into the digital world. I have a whole world built for it already and a central sort of issue/theme revolving around a power struggle between the Demon Lords and the Royal Knights. The Royal Knights control HUB City, which is the major settlement in the continent, the Demon Lords control the Dark Lands, and kind of like usual they all want to wipe each other out. There's eventually a viral sort of glitch that starts to deteriorate the digital world and jumps to the real world.

Part of my problem is I've wanted to make it a comic or at the very least an illustrated fic and part of the problem is I'm trying to decide if I want to keep it as a crossover or just slap some new names onto the execs bc i gotta be real, the pokemon world and other pokemon characters. do not feature. at all.

its really just an excuse for me to give petrel a digimon.

anyways they all have full evolution lines planned, i've got a few major story beats, plot points, and the major final twist decided on. i also have 5 amvs that i play in my head on a loop when i drive to and from work.

also in this fic some digimon are gay (stingmon and flamedramon makeout sessions when) and trans (crusadermon, trans queen) ive decided

i think ive posted old art before extending the au to some characters and for my perfworld mutuals if youve seen my sycamore + dukemon art before that specific dukemon is also from this au. ive also got a fic i did publish where i workshopped a little bit of HUB city & a few side characters

i am now realizing i meant to also talk about the original fic i have planned and that one is a short story about a serial killer who murders hitchhikers picking up a hitchhiking serial killer and that one is less planned out but i know they sloppy kiss in the end

13. a fandom you're thinking about writing for

so like besides pokemon and tiger & bunny & digimon there's none i actively have fic ideas for, but some fandoms I think I'd like to revisit are Sonic and Zelda. Actually I had a Zelda fic I abandoned back on FFNet that I'd like to take another crack at one day where the premise was it was a modern setting based on the OOT/TP Hyrule (mostly OOT) where magic and fairies and such are regarded as superstition sort of the same way they are now, and the wondrous races (Goron, Zora, Kokiri/Korok, etc. even the Sheika to some extent) had all died out, leaving pretty much just the human races like Hylian, Terminian, Gerudo, etc. (In this case Termina is legitimately a neighboring kingdom/country and not limbo/purgatory ok??) And the kicker was Link was like. a hardcore atheist. but i think i remember people getting mad at me bc i made his legal name "Mahas" which I MUST IMPLORE YOU. THIS IS CANONICALLY HIS NAME AS OF SKYWARD SWORD. BELIEVE IT OR NOT THERE WAS AN ATTEMPT TO BUILD A PSEUDO LANGUAGE IN SKYWARD SWORD. WE KNOW HIS NAME IS MAHAS BECAUSE IN THE BEGINNING WHEN FI IS JUST CALLING HIM LINK AND NOT MASTER LINK HER VOICE LINES ARE EVER ONLY MAHAS. ONCE SHE BEGINS CALLING HIM MASTER LINK ANY TIME IT APPEARS ON SCREEN SHE SAYS "MAARI MAHAS." SO IM RIGHT OK FUCK OFF IM RIGHT. DIE MAD FFNET. DIE. MAD.

ahem.

im normal now.

anyways yeah i'd like to write for elder scrolls again too i think but like. something more original than the supernatural/TESIV Oblivion retelling crossover i tried once.

You can find that one on my ao3 but im not linking it.

20. in what year did you publish your first fic?

In the year of our lord 2005 (pensive emoji)(raised fist emoji) I published a... fic of some kind to FFNet.

You won't find it anymore, I deleted it a long time ago! I'm not sure if it was 'Rocket Road Trip' or 'The Rebellion,' but it was one of those. I used to write a ton of OC team rocket fics, and this was back in the day when the Rocket Executives had no name so you either thought there was 1 guy exec and 1 girl exec or you thought each exec encounter in GSC was a different person, and that was me. So I gave them all names and threw them into a truck together and i think in the very first chapter they were leaving the Team Rocket HQ and they ran over and left to die the OC who would later go on to be repurposed into Proton except his name was Steve then and he was a special classification of trainer class that I called a "Random Rocket," and the thing about Random Rockets was they all had very generic names (Steve, Bob, Juan, I think there was a Nancy once but she never got to show up in a fic or rp?) but the OTHER thing about Random Rockets was no one knew what they looked like because canonically their faces were all censored with a big ass mosaic effect (this was written, not draw.)

anyways farla cussed me out on 3 or 4 different fics back when she used to cuss out literal children so I deleted all my fics from 2005 - 2008 and then I deleted more of them when I went to college.

don't be like farla.

edit: self-plugging my old FFNet account for the lulz. yes it is i, the original author of Slowpoke Tails and Koffing Fumes.

#bedruil #kurasays #ask game #THANK YOU FRIEND!!!

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jupitercl0uds · 1 year ago

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hi! i'm ash

they/them/xe/xem • panromantic • asexual • non binary • autistic (with suspicions of having adhd) • english • atheist quaker • a tad bit silly

been on the tumbler since 2021 so i know my way around here but i dont get every little reference (i get most and for the ones i dont i just nod and smile along). i am still a teenager so some Classic Posts are older than me and most are from when i was in primary school.

i dont really have a sophisticated tagging system, but if it helps, spouting to the void is my text post tag. i dont even strictly use it for text posts tbf

blogs i run:

this one (obviously)

@blues-amazing-blog - oc blog (currently on hiatus)

@wswe-autism-fic - fanfic blog (for waluigi says 'wa' everyday until dekuyama is popular). i also treat this as an alt account for fandom stuff sometimes

@knuckles-with-a-keyboard - silly little blog where i pretend to be boom!knuckles (i really really love this blog its so fun)

@jupitercl0uds-art - my art blog (shock horror)

@nonbinary-sticks-the-badger - my sonic blog

external links (whoops forgot to add this)

maybe one day ill set up a linktree idk

ao3

letterboxd

twitter (i only use this for posting from my switch now)

spotify profile

email me - [email protected]

dm me on discord: jupitercl0uds

i think thats it

click this link for more external links including some of the above ones but specifically how to contact me if i cant use tumblr

interests:

omg i love so many things its not even funny. a few important ones are waluigi (special interest), sonic the hedgehog (special interest AND hyperfixation (omg please kill me)), art (like, as a general thing, but particularly visual) and you WILL find me randomly posting oh-so-passionately about something ive never even mentioned before.

i do animation and illustration but that's over on my art blog. also all my animations are WIPs. you probably won't find anything other than a few weird lip syncs from when i was like 11 (i got into animation because of gacha life and animation memes). most of my art is sonic atm lol.

i also read and write fanfic! my wattpad and ao3 is jupitercl0uds :D

wattpad is mostly old stuff, crack and occasional reposts of my ao3 stuff. ao3 is mostly whatever is on my mind at the moment and WSWE.

misc

occasionally i get all heated up about actually important stuff. that's usually sandwiched inbetween my regular goofy goober behaviour. for the basic gist of it: very left wing, the tories are cunts, vote green, free palestine. you also need to understand the weight of that sentence because i hate swearing.

i have other socials too but i dont really use them that much. got bored of twitter and i forget about all my other accounts. only ones i use now are whatsapp (lmao), tumblr and i guess ao3 and wattpad. theres no real point in linking something i havent used in months

anyway, have a nice day and please go to bed on time!

faves (non-exhaustive)

AUTISM BOY!!!! ANXIETY GUY!!!! MILES 'TAILS' PROWER!!!! he's been my favourite sonic character since i was little!!!! except for that brief period where it was amy because i found out tails was a boy and i, as a 7-year-old girl who had just learned about misoginy, decided amy was better because she was a girl. and that briefer period where it was cream because she had confetti in sonic dash.

my favourite iterations of him are scu tails, classic tails and sonic boom tails!!! i h/c him as autistic, having anxiety, low self-esteem but also being really cheerful and nonchalant about a lot of stuff. i enjoy trans tails of all kinds, but i believe in cis gnc tails.

NON-BINARY ICON!!!! TOP SURGERY GUY!!!! WALUIGI!!!! call me thomas jefferson cause i have an entire binder on this guy. waluigi is THE blorbo from my spin-off-party-shows. i got into him because 'hahahaha! it is the funny garlic man's funny rose partner!' and that became 'they could marry me and i'd say yes on the basis that we'd get to see each other everyday, even if i only love him as a friend.

im very passionately hateful about 'hot' waluigi. shut up. waluigi is perfect. i hope he can be canon one day <3 i h/c him as autistic, transmasc non binary and really into gothic lolita. i interpret their relationship with wario as romantic partners and waluigi being super super poor. also, wlw mlm solidarity with rosalina!!!!!

anti-faves

dr starline i love a bisexual icon as much as the next person but starline is not it. i want him to Suffer. which is why i then go on to make loads of fanart of him where he's crying over something. in the one shown above, i have just kicked him in the balls (full image). i also would love to be a VA for him because that'd really piss him off. good style tho. you go girl.

manjimutt (sorry but i only have 1 image of him)

hello to the other living yokai watch fan out there. i hate manjimutt. when i was younger i felt sorry for him, cause i was like 'oh, poor guy, always going to jail!!!' no. die. i do not like him. i hate manjimutt. i do like saying his name tho. MAnji-mutt! i think i hate him more than starline, because at least starline has redeeming qualities. the only redeeming qualities manjimutt has is pity because hes not actually committing crimes. thats it. hes not a nice person. hes just a guy. hit him with a wooden plank (har har).

that poor poor poodle though

posts i like

idk posts on my own blog i like a lot. idk if thisll be A Thing because im literally only doing tthis because of the first post on the list

recognising a url and the chaos that followed

stuff about my lgbtq+ identity idk

THIS IS HOW MUCH I KNOW ABOUT SONIC OK!!!!!

can you call me that slur?

#pinned post

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sterlingarcher · 2 years ago

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I love seeing your posts about like bandom history and just discussion and reflection from a more mature adult's angle, it's really relatable to me at 29. And while I have not involved in bandom before late 2015, I have studied a lot myself, and Panic! and Brendon were my first faves and still high up there. It really disappoints me how brutal antis are as I have figured them out to a T, treating minor errors as hate-crimes from Brendon but not anyone else. Are we not all human?

i havent checked my messages in so long so im not 100% certain when this was sent but this was a really nice thing to stumble upon today 😭😭😭 it makes me feel good to know that there are people out there who can sort of ~smell what im stepping in~ so to speak and that when i talk about this stuff its not always falling on deaf ears. ive always rejected the term “anti” because it feels so immature to say, but honestly what other word is there to even describe most of these people? haters? bullies? assholes? they dont have any actual critical thought behind why they came to hate brendon, they just know it became the cool and popular thing to hate him and “blame him” for shit and they couldnt bear the thought of not following the crowd and fitting in. youd be hard pressed to find me anyone whos life has been documented and scrutinized for as long as and as harshly as brendons since they were a teenager who HASNT stumbled or fucked up or put their foot in their mouth at some point. its wildly hypocritical because these people act very pure and righteous, and like theyve never done or said anything wrong or questionable or problematic in their lives which is just…. quite literally patently untrue for every person on earth. to assert moral and ethical superiority over a person like brendon is to be horrendously disingenuous, and it grossly highlights the efficacy of social media fandom war smear campaigns, lack of proper journalism, and the terrifying degeneration of peoples ability to engage in critical thought and perform unbiased fact-based research. these people act like brendon singlehandedly committed genocide or some shit, and honestly i find these people spend far more time thinking and talking about him than we as fans do. like he quite literally lives in these peoples heads rent free, and these are the same people who call us pathetic for still enjoying him and his music after all these years and not dropping off and following the crowd of sheeple like they did. like these people have the nerve to behave like 13 year old lunch-room bullies and then turn around and call people cringe and pathetic for *checks notes* … enjoying someone and their art and music. like honey the call is coming from inside the house. they love to use the classics like “jeez its just a joke” or “its not that deep…” when the reality is that if it was truly not that deep they wouldnt spend so much time obsessing over him and talking about him more than his fucking fans do. they quite literally troll his and panics tags and quote retweet and reblog almost everything they see with a shitty snide remark that they truly think is soooo clever and original (🙄) like its their fucking 6 figure paid career path. they constantly poke the bear, go swinging at a hornets nest with lead pipes, and then they get confused and pissed when they get bit and stung. like literally dude what did you expect? you come into a space specifically to cause trouble and piss people off and then act like the victim when you actually accomplish that??? call people cringe and fail and annoying and strange when they get emotional over something they clearly care deeply about??? as though if the tables werent turned these people wouldnt immediately start screaming crying throwing up and playing the victim. honestly though at the very end of the day i truly believe these proudly self-proclaimed “haters” are more miserable than ill ever be no matter how bad my life circumstances get. because ultimately i only spend a few hours, maybe a day or two at most being pissed that these bullies and mean-girls exist and love to invade our spaces for shits and giggles. but they apparently spend entire days, weeks, months… YEARS of their lives being bitter and vile and mean for the sake of maybe 10 likes on twitter and 5 minutes of internet validation. what a sad fucking existence. i prefer to be someone who enjoys things and engages with and consumes things that make me happy and joyful thank you :) anyway sorry for the ramble! if you read all of it i appreciate and love you for it!! 💕

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fandomfoodiedancer · 2 years ago

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I posted 11,817 times in 2022

That's 3,171 more posts than 2021!

165 posts created (1%)

11,652 posts reblogged (99%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@immrbrightsideeee

@viva-la--resistance

@ruler-of-brokenhearts

@sinestezijaa

@alrightythenbabe

I tagged 82 of my posts in 2022

#help - 6 posts

#sanremo - 4 posts

#eliot spencer x reader - 4 posts

#leverage fanfic - 3 posts

#nate macauley - 3 posts

#stress - 3 posts

#eliot spencer - 3 posts

#ok - 3 posts

#eliot x reader - 3 posts

#nate macauley x reader - 3 posts

Longest Tag: 103 characters

#i havent been able to call my father daddy in years even though ive wanted to as it makes me feel awful

My Top Posts in 2022:

Silent Tears

Summary: Eliot sees your break down and helps you through it.

Warning: self harm, suicidal thoughts, eating disorders, all round depression and sadness.

a/n: this is dark, hits a bit close to home, but it’s good to vent and I hope others can find comfort in this Eliot fic! <3

Sitting on the lounge, you put your earphones in, tuning out the yelling as Sophie, Nate, Hardison and Parker played Monopoly whilst Eliot was cooking something for dinner. You stared at the laptop screen in front of you, typing hazily your thoughts onto an old document you'd had for years, like a personal diary that you only updated when you wanted to or needed to vent. But it wasn't enough. Needing air, you tried to look calm as you walked past everyone, making your way through the small house you'd rented for a holiday until you reached the backyard. Under the stars is the only place you truly felt safe. The only place you could breathe fresh air and allow yourself to feel. Emotions washed over you and before you knew it you were crying. Sobbing. Suffocating.

No sound left your mouth, as silent tears fell, fogging up your view of the sky. For a few seconds the world looked crystal clear before the tear rolled down your cheeks. Anger at the world for being so cruel to you and your family, for treating you like the butt of its jokes. Hatred aimed at yourself. Hurt from your past and the insults your mind hurled at you. Grief and fear for the future. Everything rippled through you, until soon all that was left were the tears.

Left numb as the last tears fell, a strange calm washed over you as you looked at the stars, feeling like Orion was soothing your soul, trying to heal the parts of you that you believed to be broken, smoothing the edges until they were soft enough to feel love again. The guitar of your music played through the earphones, speaking to emotions, offering small pieces of hope with the warm night air blowing the stars around.

“Hey sweetheart, I noticed you've been gone for a bit. Thought you might like to come and help me with dinner? I'm planning on making dessert too, but it'll take both of us to manage that and watch dinner” Eliot's voice was soft, concern lacing the small undertones of his question.

“Yeah, yeah I'll be right in.” Hearing his footsteps leave, you wiped your eyes, prepping yourself to go back inside and help with dinner.

You loved to cook. Had since you were little. You weren't good at it to start with, learning the hard way that potatoes were flammable, but you slowly got there. Now cooking felt safe, it was something to be creative with, to share with the ones you loved, and if you put enough into it, it could be art. That was one of the reasons you loved cooking with Eliot so much. He understood your love for food, and you understood his. However you always let him do most of the cooking, as dancing was your true passion, cooking was his. It was beautiful and fun to watch him in the kitchen, get all grumpy when it didn't work, but the small grin and faint chuckle when something was perfect made your heart flutter.

“Alright chef, what are we making?”

“Well, I've got the satay on the stove, the rice is half way through cooking and we need to get the vegetables in the oven. If we get creative, we can make an easy lemon meringue pie before dinner is finished being made.” The look of excitement in his eyes warmed your heart, helping to forget about the wave of depression that had hit you earlier.

Soon enough Eliot had assigned you different things until you fell into a comfortable dance of rotating between checking the different parts cooking for dinner, peeling and cutting the vegtables and making the lemon curd and the pie shell, leaving the meringue for last. Soon enough, all that was left was the stirring and to make the meringue. You were so busy that you didn't have a second thought when you rolled your sleeves up.

“Hardison! Man, I need you to stir this satay every two mintues. The oven and rice cooker will turn off in a few and just leave 'em” You looked at Eliot confused. He never let anyone else touch his kitchen, you were lucky he let you in when he found out you loved cooking too.

“Yeah, sure man, is everything good?” Hardison seemed as confused as you.

“Yeah, yeah, just gonna get some air for a minute” Signalling for you to follow him, Eliot swept out of the kitchen, into the backyard where you had been less than an hour ago.

The stars were still beautiful, as was the weather, but a nervous feeling set into your bones as Eliot looked at you for a minute with his arms crossed, staring at you concerned. For a split second his eyes glanced down at your arms. You knew he saw them. Eliot has been exposed to every kind of wound, and with such an eye for observation, you knew he understood what they were. No need to lie to him or blame your cat. He knew. Tears pricked at your eyes. Softening his stance, Eliot pulled you to him in a tight hug. You broke the silence first.

“It's fucking bullshit Eliot. All of it. It's so much crap I can't breathe” Unsure of when the tears had started to fall, you tried to keep from panicking as he stroked your hair to calm you down. You stood like that in his arms until you lost track of time, until your breathing settled, until the tears stopped and you could hear his strong and steady heart beat past your own.

“C'mon. Tell me what's going on.” Tugging you to the ground, Eliot sat down, pulling you onto his lap so he could hold you some more.

“No, Eliot, I'm too heavy to sit on your lap” It killed you to say.

“Pffft, no you're not. Sophie's luggage weighs more than you.” You giggled, not doubting that for a second, but you couldn't help but let your face fall when you remembered what you were talking about.

“Is that it sweetheart? Not feeling good about yourself?” His probing tone was so gentle that you spilt everything you'd been keeping in for years.

“Not just that. I mean, yeah, it's a good bit of it. I've hated myself since I was little. I've always been the bigger one out of my sisters and me. I know that most of it's muscle, and my friends just say I'm curvy, but I hate it. I feel like a fucking blimp, and being short too makes me stumpy. I've tried everything, dieting, vomiting, not eating, over working out and healthy methods. Nothing works, I never change. I hate it. And I hate how things are with my family. My sisters have always taken all the attention, as the angel and demon whilst I'm invisible. The only time I'm not invisible is when they need me to do all the housework, the cooking and cleaning and all the rest of the shit. I try to open up to my mum. I try to explain how I feel inside and every time I try, she just tells me I need to lose weight. I need to cut out sugar, eat less calories, count everything. She never says it to my sisters. Only me. It fucking hurts. Especially when every day my brain insults me, about how I look, how I'm useless, how I can never do anything right, how I'm a fuck up and a waste of space. I mean, the world must be punishing me as my dad got sick, badly, recently. I'm npt even good enough to save him from that. But for some fucking reason, despite it all, I don't have the guts to end it. Even though my family life is fucked up and manipulative. Even though I'm this fucking thing. Even though the world clearly doesn't want me anymore. I just want it all to stop.” You don't know when the tears started, but you watched as the droplets fell onto your trackies. No point in trying ro look good when you know no one wants you, especially Eliot. At least that's what you thought.

“I know the feeling. Maybe not the feeling of hating my reflection that bad, but I know the feeling of worthlessness. Of hopelessness. Of never seeing a light at the end of a tunnel and when you think you do, it's a fucking train. But there is life after survival. It doesn't feel like it, but there is. Now, I won't pretend I know or understand what it's like for you, but know I'm here sweetheart. What we got, in there, those four idiots playing board games, that's our family now. This is your home. Your place to let it all out. You don't need to hide from us to cry, or cut into yourself to get the emotions out because you feel you don't have another option. Tell us. We're here for you. I'm here for you. Can I ask why?”

You didn't even need to ask what he was refering to.

“I'm not sure. The first time I did I was angry. A dull, throbbing anger and sorrow that I wanted to scream. But I couldn't. So I dragged my broken nail down my arm until it left a mark. Then I did it again. I guess it's about control. I can't control my life. I can't control what happens at home, or work or even at dance classes. But I can control myself. I can make sure that I don't hurt anyone, even if they deserve it, I can make sure not to yell or snap or hit anyone or anything, by taking it out on myself instead. So yeah, I guess it's about control. Or maybe that I feel I deserve it. Maybe it's that the sting reflects how I feel, so my feelings and tears seem vaild, or maybe it's because it distracts me, shuts the voices up in my mind, or maybe it's because I'm just addicted to the sting. I remembered wanting someone to notice at first, hoping they could see my pain and help me, but now I don't want to burden anyone”

After a moment of silent nodding Eliot spoke up.

“I'm not going to force you to stop. I'm not going to make you promise not to. I know how it can be. How addictive. Me and my fists.... well there's a reason they're red and raw most days and it ain't because someone needed my help. I know the draw of the sting. But please stop darlin', I don't wanna see you hurt, I don't want you to have lasting scars from a pain that isn't permanent. More than that, I wouldn't.. I can't let anything happen to you, y/n. I care too damn much to let anything take you from us.”

“How do you know my pain's not permanent? I've felt like this since I was twelve. Hated my body since I was eight. I don't even see how it's bad for me anymore”

“I wish... I wish you could see what you mean to me. Who you are and how amazing it is to be around you. Did you know my cooking always turns out better when you're in the kitchen? Even when you're not doing anything, just sitting on the counter babbling to me, you make it better. And did you know that Parker actually sleeps more peacefully since you gave her that stuffed animal and that Hardison gets the biggest smile on his face when you ask about his video games, even though you don't seem to really understand them? Did you know that Sophie sees you like her daughter and that Nate drinks less when you're around? You make things better and you're completely unaware of it. And I sleep better when you're around. I find that I can breathe more. This team are the only people in the world that I can open up to, you especially. As for your looks. Excuse me for saying and I don't want to make you uncomfortable, but damn. The way you look. Beautiful. Stunning. Divine. There aren't enough words in the English language, or any other language for that matter, that can describe how beautiful you are, inside and out. You don't need to be skinny to be beautiful, and honey you are gorgeous as you are. That being said, don't think for a minute that you're too big. To me, you're the most beautiful woman in the world.”

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30 notes - Posted June 20, 2022

The Proposal Job

summary: your brother Quinn finds out that Eliot has proposed to you, in a less than ideal situation.

Warning: a little bit of soft smut in the first bit, then angst.

a/n: @being-worthy I'm so sorry this took me so long, I hope you like it!

The rain poured, hard waves of water crashing onto the window above your bed, but the sounds were hardly noticeable to you. The sounds of skin on skin mixed with the groans escaping Eliot's sinful lips had you creating cries of your own. As his lips captured yours in a searing kiss, your spirit started to rise as the tension in your lower stomach got tighter and tighter, clenching around him as his rhythm started to falter. So close yet so far when the door burst open, the doorknob making a dent in the wall as you're big brother came running into the room. So fast it was a blur, Quinn ripped Eliot from you, throwing him to the ground.

“I'll give you ten seconds to put some boxers on so you can have a bit of dignity whilst I beat your sorry arse” The rage on Quinn's face was undeniable, as was the amusement on Eliot's.

“Bring it on”

For fucks sake. Men and their egos. Throwing on a dressing gown, you stomped over to the brutes, hoping to stop the fight. One hand on each man's chest as Eliot slipped the boxers on, you turned to face your brother, hoping to explain yourself.

“Qui-” In the time it took you to get half his name out, he had already seen the glimmer of the diamond on your ring finger. This wouldn't be good.

In seconds he was aiming for you, throwing fists, nearly landing kicks as you all but dodged away from him, hoping this would at least stop him from attacking Eliot. As the disbelief fell from Eliot that he was no longer the target, he grabbed Quinn, pinning him against the wall, maintaining a tight grip as the anger from Quinn stayed targeted on you.

“Y/n. I... he... why?” The anger slipped into betrayal “You're my sister! We've only ever had each other and we promised – you fucking promised – that we would tell each other everything! Then you go and get fucking engaged to this arsehole without even mentioning it to me?! And you Mr. Big Time Thug, couldn't even be bothered to fucking ask for a blessing, which, no, by the way, you will not get!”

The room stood still for a moment as Quinn tried to collect himself, but you spoke first.

“Quinn, you are my brother and I love you. I have never, and will never lie to you. The only reason I didn't tell you about Eliot was I thought you would kill him, and now that he's proposed to me – which was only tonight so you don't need to sulk about that – I was planning on telling you in the morning.” All fight had left Quinn as Eliot slowly backed away from him. You squished in between the hitters to hug your brother.

“Does he make you happy?” His voice was softer than Eliot ever thought possible. But he knows you have a way with empathy.

“More than anyone else in the world. I love him, every time I see him he makes me smile. With him, I never feel insecure, only loved as much as I love him” Nodding his head, Quinn's soft eyes turned cold as he stared Eliot down.

“Do you love her? Do you promise to never leave her or hurt her? Because no amount of threats right now will do justice to what I will put you through if not” Daggers were being sent laced in venom with every word that left Quinn's mouth.

“I do. I know that I don't deserve her, but I will do everything in my power to make her happy Quinn, please, I know this isn't easy in our profession, but I'm begging you to believe me, to trust me.”

Seemingly happy with his answer, Quinn nodded and pulled away from your grip, headed towards the door. Stopping in the doorway, he turned to add a final thought.

“Just so you know, I expect to be a taste tester for everything on the wedding menu. And to have a vote in the floral arrangement.” With those parting words, he left the room as Eliot closed the door again.

“Well. That went better than expected” You smiled as you hooked your arms around Eliot's shoulders eager to finish what you had started.

“Yeah, you're telling me” holding onto your waist, he kissed you softly as you backed up onto the bed.

39 notes - Posted February 22, 2022

It’s Always the Quiet Ones

summary: When on a con with Eliot a few secrets are shared

warnings: fighting, smut

a/n: posted at 2 am for me, sorry it’s unedited. :)

You shifted in bed, nervous about how the con would go down. The mark had several henchmen, and this con wouldn't happen without a fight. You knew Eliot would be safe, he always is, but you couldn't stand the idea of him getting hurt. But him finding out about you seemed worse. Throwing back the covers, you shuffled into your flannel pyjama pants and bunny slippers, taking comfort in the softness before grabbing your book and heading downstairs and across the hall to Nate's living room.

After becoming a family with the leverage team, and once Hardison bought the building of the Boston pub, you had moved into an apartment that connected with Nate's. An apartment that you also shared with Eliot and Hardison, whilst Parker had a room if she wanted it, but usually chose to sleep in her warehouse. It was fun sharing an apartment with your closest friends, but made you extra nervous at times as you hoped Eliot wouldn't find out how you felt about him.

Curling up on the lounge, you opened your book, immersing yourself in its world, losing all your stresses. Faint footsteps cam closer to your seat, but you only bothered to look up when a shoulder brushed yours.

“What're you doing up so late sweetheart?” Eliot's voice was gravelly, as if you had woken him up when you turned the kettle on for a cup of peppermint tea.

“I just couldn't sleep” There was something about Eliot that made you open up to him, even when you usually wouldn't. “I'm worried about the con tomorrow. I know this guy won't go down without a fight and I know he has dozens of people working for him. I just don't want you to get hurt”

Wrapping his arm around you, Eliot sighed, warmed by how much you cared but also wanting to laugh. He had been through so much, a few goons wouldn't be the end of him.

“Y/n, I'll be alright, it's my job. Yes I throw the punches, but I know how to take them too. I'll be fine, don't worry about me”

Snuggling into him, you nodded and tried to think of something to say until you softly fell asleep on him, leaving Eliot to pick up your book and take a chance reading it for himself.

“Fuck”

You were cornered by thugs. Eliot was beside you, but there were about fifteen of them, slowly walking closer to you both. When the con started to turn bad and the mark got suspicious, Eliot needed help with the distraction. Clearly it had worked too well. Taking in a deep breath, you released a part of you that you had kept secret, held in the back of your mind in hopes of forgetting it, forgetting where it came from and why it was there. Searching through the goons, you found him. The typical thug, tall, body builder type muscles that aren't too useful and next to nothing behind his eyes. Yep, this was the guy to knock down first. Consider it a warm up. Get fucked bitches. With that you felt your past self slip onto you like a warm worn through coat. As you stalked towards your prey, you saw his eyes flash with uncertainty. Now was the time to hit. Eliot must've seen it in another thugs eyes, throwing the first punch.

Hooking your arm around the closest guys neck, you pulled him down, forcing him to bend his legs, where you climbed onto his knee then shoulder, throwing yourself towards your prey as you hit his temple with your elbow on impact, quickly catching your own landing. One was already down, thirteen left thanks to Eliot. The fight went fast and you used every bit of knowledge you knew. Go for the soft point to distract, then hit them hard where it counts. A kick to the nuts and a knee to the forehead. Catch their punch, twist their arm, use their momentum to swing yourself onto their shoulders black widow style and cut off their air way until they pass out. Kick behind the knee and fan kick to the head. Most of your fighting used your legs, as you had more muscle there than in your arms. Soon enough there were a pile of thugs at both of your feet as Eliot stared at you. Unsure what to tell him, you called an ambulance for the unconscious men, hoping you hadn't given them concussions or brain damage. You'd never had to fight that hard, or knock many people out so you hoped they were alright. They may have been 'baddies' but they didn't deserve a hard life or to die.

“You should've seen her man!” Eliot practically yelled at Hardison as everyone drove back to Nate's apartment in Lucille. Apparently you'd left an impression on him, as he told the team in almost exaggerated detail how the pair of you fought together.

“Are you for real? Little miss loves-reading-and-fluffy-blankets, who cries at romantic comedies-”

“That's because some of them are really beautiful and you know it!” You cut in needing to defend yourself, but Hardison continued.

“-can hold her own in a fight. You know, I've got to watch this footage. Gimme a sec” If it wasn't for Nate driving you feel Hardison would have pulled over to check. Within seconds the security camera footage showed everyone but Nate how you fought.

“Damn girl! Maybe you should be teaching Eliot” This made Parker snicker as he slapped Hardison's shoulder in agreement. Were you really that good? Apparently so considering the sound affects Parker and Eliot were making as they re-watched the footage.

The soft sound of Notting Hill filled the living room as you and Eliot swapped ice packs for the different bruises.

“Eliot?”

“Yeah?”

“Do you, um, do you think of me any differently now that you know I can fight?” This is what made you nervous. Would he care? Would he ask about your past?

“Honestly? No. You're still you. You're funny and smart and cheesy, you still love making history puns and laugh at your own bad jokes. So, you might've been through some stuff to know how to fight like that but I don't see you any different. At least, not in a bad way” A small smirk made you curious.

“What do you mean?”

“Well, I mean, come on. You're already one of the most beautiful women on the planet, but watching you fight. Damn. That was hot of hell.”

“You're only saying that because your on your fourth beer of the night”

“Nah, I've thought it for awhile, I just needed a bit of liquid courage to say it”

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56 notes - Posted January 3, 2022

Guys. Guys, what if I write one of us is lying fanfic? Specifically Nate Macaulay?

65 notes - Posted January 28, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Treat You Better

summary: you're falling for Nate, but believe he likes Bronwyn instead

warning: yelling at home? Tiny bit of angst?

A/n: I am so so sorry this took me so long to write @mangardel! I haven't edited it yet sorry, so please let me know if it's ok!

More yelling. That's how it always was. You turned the horror movie in front of you up, half listening to it, half listening to Nate.

“Fuck, it was so funny when Bronwyn first saw this movie, she couldn't even watch it! Apparently she doesn't appreciate a good jump scare”

“Haha, I mean they can be scary though” You gave a response, but your heart sank further. You'd been friends with Nate for years, he was there for you when shit went down, and you were there for him when he had to deal with it all too. But lately you'd been feeling the distance between you grow, making your heart hurt as you realized he didn't love you back. For ages you'd felt he was in love with Bronwyn, and the more he talks about her, the more you felt you had no chance.Why bother calling him when he want's nothing to do with you?

“y/n?”

“hmm?”

“You've been silent for a while, where'd your sarcastic commentary go?” The teasing in his voice reassured you, but still you felt distant. But it was better to have him as a friend than not at all. You commented throughout the movie until you eventually ended the call to sleep. Maybe tomorrow would be better.

“This fucking sucks Rojas!”

“What do you mean?” Nate didn't bother saying hello, just barged into the conversation with Bronwyn as they waited for the rest of the so called murder club to arrive.

“It's y/n, she's driving me fucking nuts! You're a girl-”

“woman”

“-so tell me, why does she seem so on and off. It's like, we're best friends, then the next day she won't even answer my calls? I don't get her.”

“Well, have you spoken to her about how you feel?”

“huh, good one. Why ruin the thing we have? It's obvious she isn't into me” With a loud snort, Bronwyn fell off her seat.

“Are you kidding me? She's falling for you! Not even, she's already fallen! Are you so oblivious?”

“Oh shit. Really?”

“Yes dumbass!”

Another night, another fight. You'd called Nate to watch a movie with you, hoping for some distraction from the noises in your house, but he never answered. Sighing, you turned on your laptop, settling on the first sad looking romance movie you could find, only to hear your phone chime.

I'm out the front on my bike. Sneak out.

You fought yourself internally. Why meet him if he couldn't even answer a call? But also, anything had to be better than being alone right now.

As you snuck up the drive way, he tossed you his helmet. Clearly he was trying to get you out of there fast. Shit, he must've heard the yelling, you thought as he started the drive. After a while, he pulled into a small park.

“You always wanted to go to a park at night right?” You laughed at the memory of telling him, as he offered you his hand before pulling you toward the swings. Rolling your eyes, you took the swing to the left, taking the earbud he silently held out to you. The first few beats of the song filled your ears.

“I want you to listen to these lyrics ok? Really listen to them” You hadn't ever heard Nate so serious about a song, but still you listened closely, even though you knew all the words. By the second verse, Nate had caught your eyes, as if he was singing the song to you.

I'll stop time for you

the second you say you'd like me to

I just wanna give you the loving that you're missing

baby just to wake up with you

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119 notes - Posted April 21, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

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dausy · 2 years ago

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Ive posted this to IG and twitter before. Again, art for just fillers sake. Kinda an art vs artist version 2022 but not all of these were done this year.

I mentioned on IG that this year started off really rough. We got hit at the same time with both my husbands dad passing away and our cat at the same time. It was a rough January. I then lost both grandmothers. We did do some cool things. Disney at easter time was a lot of fun. We did the new ratatouille ride, husband got to do Rise of the Resistance for the first time but unfortunately the new GotG ride wasnt open yet. I also got to see my first ever Cirque du Soleil show and saw Alannis Morrisette in concert. I also got really lucky with art companies sending me lots of art freebies. Its been so cool. I never thought Id ever be worthy of art freebies.

Now ofcourse we are just hanging out in our hotel. Housing said theyd hopefully have our house ready next week. Im so ready to be moved in and buy new stuff for our home. Our apartment we had a mantle over a fireplace for our tv and now I think we need to go buy a tv stand. I dont know why thats exciting but it is. I also tossed all our old shower curtains so now Im going to retheme the bathrooms 8D

Ofcourse having my art space back would be nice. Its hard to create outside a comfy spot.

As for the area..now Ive lived in the southwest before but I think my dog is missing the grass. Shes having a hard time using the bathroom with her little feet and decorative rocks. We've yet to track down a dog park just yet but shes overdue for a game of fetch.

My first impression was how huge this city was. Like I knew it was large based on population but like idk..guess I thought people would build up? Everything is like single story accross a vast flat land. Its so weird to see houses go that far back. I am so far enjoying the amenities. Alot of the neighborhoods are definitely screaming border city ghetto. Ive yet to wander into the higher class neighborhoods yet but even amongst the ghetto looking houses they have so many amentities in one place. I havent seen a super target in years and I went in one today 8D and we've gone indoor rock climbing twice so far. I got dutch bros coffee (Im never going back but Ive never been to one before!!!). And they have a disney store here! A DISNEY STORE. I THOUGHT THEY WERE ALL DEAD! They had simba/nala plushies and I put them back 8(

What Im most excited for is one of the 3 rock gyms is 5 mins from my house and free to me. The major regular gym is accross the street. The army post here is the fanciest Ive ever seen. Theres a starbucks down the street too. So honestly if I could find remote work I never need to leave post really.

Anywho I applied for a couple jobs. Im still a bit overwhelmed and its really hard to job search and fill out apps on a phone/ipad. Much easier on a desktop. And its obviously very much so like a foreign country. I have heard more Spanish here than English which is also..making..job hunting interesting.

But Im not going to worry for now.

I am going to make another tumblr post later probably about other things Ive accomplished this year but this ones long enough.

#artvsartist #artvsartist2022 #sketchbook #illustration #realmedia #watercolors #gouache #sketch #drawing #traditionalart #mixedmedia #traditionalmedia #lion #tiger #artist #artblog #lifeblog

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mostlymalena · 3 months ago

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August 25th 2024 11:38pm

Our landlord finally fixed our hot water today! Such a relief since it's been over a week since me and Jo took a hot shower in our own house. I spent most of my day yesterday at Lala's which was nice. She always brings me such joy and can make me laugh. We played lots of games and I even took a small nap.

Work has been so good I'm finally catching up on my LP's and ppc campaign build outs. I love my job so much!

My sweet apple and I are enjoying the time I have left. 50 something days which is hard to swallow. It's not like I'll be gone forever just 4 something months. It's nice to have something easy and well, nice. No pressure and very relaxed, mostly.

I have been hanging up pictures and art around the house and I have also started drawing again. Something about life right now is making me feel creative. Tonight I made ramen for the family and Ethan came over and we drew a little and I made brownies. He is my very very best friend.

Saturday I went out with the whole gang and a local girl who I have spoken too maybe ONCE approached me and demanded I tell her why I unfollowed her on instagram and removed her as a follower. I told her what I typed on this very blog" I don't fuck with you". She then proceeded to ask why and it got a little heated. I was steered away but it unfortunately creeped me out a lot. This girl has never had one full conversation with me. She acted like I owed her something. I wasn't sure and still am not sure what her goal was in coming at me like that. Her and my ex were posting each other before I washed away most of my followers in my social media cleansing, so maybe it has something to do with that? I'm not sure.

Why does that matter so much. I feel like she only followed me to report back to others or to find something to bad mouth. It was so fucking WEIRD. She should feel embarrassed.

This week I am having lunch with my old friend Nat who just bought a house in wilmy. I havent seen her in 4 years now so that will be exciting. I am also meeting with a family lawyer to start the prosecution process for the person who made the false CPS report.

Fall has woven its thread into the air. It smells like devotion and the death of a careless summer. Surf might be good this week and my old friend Juliet might come to town soon and we will surf as well.

I am very happy right now. Life seems perfect with my family and friends and my little house and my front porch that is always warm.

Ive become very smitten and a strange but not unwelcome peace has settled over everything. I'm hoping the autumn leaves that fall down cover the memories of summer and bury them. Spring will bring fresh blossoms and the promise of never seeing her around town ever again. It is something I dread but it is something I look forward too more. At this point it feels more like surviving her than getting over her.

I think this Adam from the Bible character has become the apple of both of my eyes. It's just so easy going. I think it helps that I'm leaving so nothing is serious, I still mourn and he just listens.

But things are different for me now. The CPS thing broke something inside me I thought was a solid thing.

I must rest now and write a bit of poetry. I took all the love I had for her and used it to fall in love with my life. I feel real. I feel like everything is okay. I feel right and that is a little scary but I'm so grateful for it all.

#august 2024

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unlimitedtrees · 1 year ago

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youtube

a build from mid 2015 of my old game 'Mr. Waffle Lover', and why everyone should archive their work

hello. this is gonna be a quick little post to talk about something. as you might already know. i've been making games since 2014. one of my Very First projects was a game called 'Mr. Waffle Lover'. i have a Lot to talk about it, but i want to save that for later. For now, i have something else i need to talk about.

So. this project was/is pretty important to me. it was one of the first things i made Ever, before i was even called 'Unlimited Trees' and before i was involved in Any online communities. i was learning A Lot from making it... a lot of the stuff i did for it is Unrecognizable from my current work.. and i havent made anything like it since. it means a lot to me, at least now.

Back Then, However... i did not treasure my work as i did now. You See, this game went through TONS of iterations. from 2014 to 2017, this game went through many changes across Multiple different project files, all with different assets and programming. during the early days, when i gave up on one iteration of the project, i would simply Delete the old files off my computer. And Then, at the beginning of 2016 when i changed my username to 'Unlimited Trees', i deleted ALL of my old work.

TONS of old games ive made were lost. some of the Very First works ive done Ever are completely missing. years of work went down the drain because i wanted to move on from my old work. But as time passed.. i became more fond of my old work, but realized that i could Never see any of it again. and since i never shared any of it to anyone outside of a few old friends (who i dont even have contact with anymore), there was no way i could get any of it back.

But. about over a year ago or so, i went through my old laptop and was able to find a bunch of old files with quite a few of my old games... some of these files werent the latest builds of these games so there was still a lot missing, but i was So Glad i found them... i have So Much i want to share and talk about and im happy i can share at least a little bit of the work ive done alone for years. even if no one cares about some dumb old games, im at least happy i dont have to worry about losing them again..

ANYWAYS. about this build of 'Mr. Waffle Lover'. it is the fourth iteration of the game. it has ideas which no other iteration has done (mainly the 'TNT' jumps). it has art and levels which i kind of like compared to the other early iterations. and it actually Plays Kind of Good , even if it is a little janky and basic. unlike most versions of the game, i actually remember sending builds of this to old friends, but i dont know if they ever played it or even still have it (i doubt they do Lol).

there's a lot more i could probably say about this, but i dont have the energy right now and will probably talk about it later in another post about 'Mr. Waffle Lover'. i have a Lot to share about it... just now is not the time. the video i posted speaks for itself, i think. its just a simple platformer with a basic OC. theres some stuff that wasnt shown in the video, such as an unfinished boss fight. but aside from that, thats all there is to see.

anyways, the point of this post is that i want to encourage more people to archive their work and not do what i did and delete all your stuff. even if in the moment you dont think your stuff is important.. you should at least keep your stuff saved in case you ever want to look back at it. Especially if youve been making things for Years... you might want to see just how much youve grown.. thats how i feel anyways. i am still missing a ton of work that ive made.. and ive since tried to archive everything i make. ive been making games for 8 years, and i put a Lot of time into the stuff ive made.. i never want to throw out any of my work again.

thats all i have to say for now i think. By The Way, the source code for this build of the game can be found here. just in case u want to give it a look. And By The Way, it's in my pinned post, but i have a few google drive folders full of All of my old projects, including everything i have from Waffle Lover (or 'Project Waffle', as it's called). i plan on moving more stuff onto github and making more posts about it.. but for now u can look thru it if u like

#TreesThinks #Project Waffle #game development #game dev #indie dev #indie game dev #indiedev #gamedev #Youtube

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reidsnose · 4 years ago

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doodles

overview: reader doodles on her hands a lot and spencer has to give into the temptation of coloring it in

genre: flufffffff

a/n: sorry ive havent posted a fic in like a week, ive been in quite a slump but i had this idea well after midnight but i just had to write it so lmk what u guys think of this one :)

masterlist

doodling on your hands: a once nervous habit that had seeped into your everyday life and now is just a regular habit. nearly everyday you would come to work with clean hands and get home with a mini art gallery on your non dominant one.

Spencer admired this from the moment he noticed it. at first he thought you had a tattoo but when you came back the next day with it completely gone, he was a tad confused, only to catch you doodling on that very same hand a couple hours later on the jet. he thought maybe it was an occasional thing, a habit you'd quit once you got better situated into the team, but after nearly a year you still left work almost everyday with some cutesy sketches drawn on your hand.

Spencer found himself looking forward to your doodles, imagining in his head what you might draw each day, and thinking of all the colors you would add if you had the time. being the great profiler that he is, he noticed a pattern: you subconsciously correlated your doodles with your mood.

after especially hard cases or just bad days you always drew roses.

when you were very happy you drew all sorts of fruits.

anxiousness bore little swampy creatures and lily pads.

tired days filled your hands with random, intricate designs that you didn't even have to try hard to make.

and content was anything else.

he was so impressed and absolutely adored your little coping mechanism. watching you concentrate on making those teeny pieces of art simply for your own pleasure was definitely a sight to see. the way your eyebrows furrowed and tongue poked out a bit was absolutely positively adorable. and soon he had noticed that he was looking forward less to the doodles and more to watching you draw them. and after that he began looking forward to just you.

you were sat on the jet with your back to the corner of the last seat on the plane, creating a pattern of roses on the back of your hand. Spencer plopped down in the seat next to you, growing tired of watching from so far away.

"that bad, huh?" he asked, noticing the type of flower you were gracing your hand with.

"hm?" you looked up, confused.

"you only doodle roses on bad days." he explained, pointing to your hand.

"what? no i don't!" you defended, " i just think roses are neat."

to be fair, you were having a bad day but he could've profiled that without the doodle. he cant be right, can he? there was no way you had a mood system for your doodles! unless there was.

"repetitive strokes are therapeutic, so roses being rough days make sense. the spiral in the middle followed by however many layered petals you want is a perfectly repetitive while still interesting enough to doodle."

"if i didn't know any better i'd say you've been spying on me, Dr. Reid," you teased, enjoying the slight rouge that appeared on his cheeks.

"what! no! i'm- i'm a profiler i notice patterns! i just- spying sounds creepy." he stammered.

"ok. how about admiring." you jabbed, turning a little red yourself.

"fine. but you know coloring helps too." he flipped back to the old topic of conversation.

"unfortunately i only have the standard blue, black and red ink."

"roses are red." he chuckled.

"interesting point," you bent down and reached into your bag, pulling out a red pen and handing it to him, "knock yourself out."

"what?" he looked at you slightly bewildered.

"coloring is therapeutic, you said it yourself. and you and i both know that you need something to relax you after a case like that. we all do." you explained, trying to be as nonchalant as you could knowing his skin would touch yours.

he grabbed the pen and clicked it open, coloring smoothly and slowly inside the lines you had already made in black, careful not to go over them and smudge the ink. you and him both tried your best to ignore the warmth shooting through your bodies from every place your hands touched. his fingertips lightly grazing your knuckles as he worked.you worked your way up your arm, giving you both space to work and by the time you landed, you had a half sleeve garden of surprisingly well colored (and somehow shaded) red roses.

you went home that night and bought a pack of colorful (washable) pens, hoping this little rose garden with him wasn't a one time thing. and even if it was, you would want to add your own pop of color to your doodles.

thankfully it wasn't.

you and Spencer found yourselves drawing and coloring on your hand a lot. he would catch you doing it and pop in over your shoulder just to add a touch of color where he thought it fit. and you began to feel sad washing off what the two of you had created that day, feeling nostalgic for time that has hardly passed.

and sometimes on the jet you would get tired of your own skin, so you would draw little doodles on his hand, often times leaving a little heart at the base of his thumb. these little hearts he avoided washing off for as long as he possibly could because they felt like a part of you was always with him. he started doing the same thing to your hand, a sort of signature the two of you shared.

most days, the doodles on your hands were pretty much fully colored in.

but now Spencer began to worry. what if you get ink poisoning because of his coloring? sure, the risk was statistically low, improbable even; but never zero. so one night after work he went out and bought a little sketchbook and on the front he scrawled,

"y/n's super duper special sketchbook"

upon receiving it, after giving him a hug he never wanted to let go of, you took a sharpie and started editing the title he had given it. so it now read:

"y/n and Spencer's super duper special sketchbook"

the two of you used up a whole page that day, front and back filled with all types of fruits. Spencer smiled to himself, knowing this had made you very happy. you took a second to take a step back and admire him doing the very thing he admired you for. and you understood why; he just looked so precious and you suddenly realized you craved the feeling of his hand touching yours. so you leaned over and drew a little black heart at the base of his thumb. he looked up at you, smiling widely before returning a red heart to the base of your thumb.

and you guys tore through that book, using a page a day and filling it cover to cover in no time. your own personal handmade coloring book. it turned out to be both of your most prized possessions, a pang of sadness filling your chests as you finished the last page.

you felt bad taking it home with you that night, wondering if maybe Spencer wanted to keep it. maybe you should keep it at work so you can both have it. thats the fair thing to do. you looked down, smiling sadly at the little red heart on your hand.

he did want to keep it. but he had a better idea in mind. he looked down, smiling excitedly at the little black heart on his hand.

the next day when you arrived to work all your worries were solved. on your desk laid a new sketch book entitled:

"y/n and Spencer's super duper special sketchbook: volume ii"

you laughed as you read a small lilac post it note that said, "i want to keep this one please" signed with a little red heart in the corner.

ultra mega super cool taglist:

@mac99martin @imhreid @spencersmagic @hollydaisy23 @raelady1184 @a-broken-pact @padfootswife @hey-there-angels @star-stuff-in-the-cosmos @sonnydoesrandomshit @coffeereid-deactivated20210303 @averyhotchner @laurakirsten0502 @reidyoulikeabook @rem-ariiana @spencerreid9 @vampire-overlord @takeyourleap-of-faith @s1utformgg @violetspoetic

#criminal minds #spencer reid #reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid x reader fluff #dr spencer reid #derek morgan #emily prentiss #penelope garcia #aaron hotchner #david rossi #luke alvez #tara lewis #matt simmons #bau #bau x reader #criminal minds fanfiction

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cloudysfluffs · 2 years ago

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hellooo!! my name is cloudy (she/they) (adult), and this is my tkl blog!! <3

my main is @cloudyssskies and my art is @cloudysarts <3333 so if you see the first in ur notes thats me, and if you wanna look at my not tkl related art you can go to that blog!!

i take reqs for tkl art and tkl hcs!! i used to write fics but ive sorta lost my touch with it since its been so long </33. so dont be afraid to shoot me a request!! i LOVE getting them, even if i dont always do them :] if you’re curious what i take requests for, you can check my interest tab under the read more!!!

this is not a kink/fetish!!!!!!!!! do NOT interact if you like tckling in a sexual context, it makes me super uncomfortable!!!!!!!!!!!! it is a coping mechanism and just for fun!!!!!!!!!!!!

DNI if you are an nsfw blog, a terf, transmed, exclusionist, lgbt-phobic (including anti neos/zenos), discourse blogs, proshipper (meaning if you ship ANYTHING involving inc//est, pedo//phillia, ab//use WHATEVER, even if its an ‘au’ or ‘aged up’, or defend those who do), think RPF (real person fanfic) is ok, and pretty much anything else youd see in a typical dni. get off my blog!!!!!! zero tolerance policy!!!!!!! i check the blog of whoever interacts w my content and youll get blocked on sight!!!!!!! ||| every once and a while i post about how tkl drama is incredibly fucking stupid or generally shit on the community for being creeps (i do not interact with it and don’t consider myself a part of it) so if you dont wanna see that you can block the tag: ‘disc horse’

ANYWAYYYY, ive put a list of my interests under the read more!!!! in no particular order, my hyperfixations change rlly fast </3 feel free to send requests for anything you see on here :]

-under///tale

-delta///rune

-little sh///op of hor///rors

-the night///mare before christ///mas

-cor///pse bri///de

-rob///ots (the 2005 blue sky movie sdfjk)

-co///co

-le///go bat///man

-beetle///juice

-five nig///hts at fred///dys

-five nig///hts at fred///dys the MUSICAL (the ran///dom enco///unters one)

-the mark///iplier cinematic universe

-cath///erine: full///body

-wic///ked/the wiz///ard of oz

-the star///kid hatchet///field series

-who fra///med roger rab///bit

-por///tal

-ha///lf li///fe

-spi///es are fore///ver

-mirac///ulous lady///bug (but i havent rlly been keeping up with the lore)

-hlv///rai

-sa///m and ma///x (all iterations except for the comics)

-ev///il de///ad (all three movies, all the old games, the musical, and MOST of the TV show B) havent seen the last season tho oops- also ive read like 3 of the comics hksdf)

-ml///p: fim

-gra///vity fa///lls

-the mo///nkey island franchise

-reg///ular sh///ow

-the o///wl ho///use

-dh///mis

-ri///ck and mo///rty

-adven///ture ti///me

-haz///bin ho///tel and hel///luva bo///ss (I THINK THESE SHOWS ARE OBJECTIVELY BAD AND I DO NOT LIKE/SUPPORT VIVZIEPOP)

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inosukeslefttoe · 4 years ago

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SO i just finished wonder egg priority and i think that with confidence i can say it has been one of my favorite animes like... ever ?? and not even from hyperfixation or obsession over it just... its so fucking real yet so simple in a way that i havent rlly seen shown in any other shows you feel ??

but first i wanna talk about how sexy the art and animation is real quick... HOMIE ITS SO GOOD LIKE EVERYTHING ABOUT IT JUST... serotonin... the characters are all so unique and iconic and fun but not over the top in their designs yknow ??? they seem like regular every day girls but they stand out and theyre all sO CUTE !!!! also i love how the style is like this soft bubbly slice of life lookin stuff with bright happy colors and the most beautiful scenes you could find but they also have the SICKEST fight scenes complete with whimsical animal helpers and terrifying villains and crazy weapons unique to each character. and the animation. god DAMN shawty i am obsessed with everything in this show. i might make a post solely about the art later lol bc i wanna get into the other stuff.

so the themes in the show right ?? it starts just as this cute lil magical girl kinda deal but within the first episode we see that like.. oh damn... thats kinda heavy... tbh i was a little shocked and thought about stopping bc yknow bad mental health BUT i was so intrigued that i had to keep going and i am SO GLAD that i did. because this show just so beautifully discusses all these heavy topics in such an eloquent and artistically expressive way. and also like, , the juxtaposition of the charming childlike vibe with bright colors and 14 yr old girl protagonists against the dark themes of suicide and so much else,, i think is just perfect. bc a lot of heavy animes are more of the seinen genre and have some middle aged dude as a protag or make the entire color palette dim or offer little relief to the pain of these heavy themes right ?? but NO not wonder egg bitches B) because these problems arent just things that ppl face later in life or just problems that need to be talked about among adults or the edgy seinen watching squad,, these are REAL problems that face people of every age, gender etc and i think its awesome that wonder egg addresses that. some may cringe at the thought of their high schooler watching animes that discuss sexual harassment, suicide, abuse, self harm, eating disorders etc,, but in reality it is the most comforting thing i have ever come across and is basically jsut free anime therapy. because not only does wonder egg present these themes to the viewers as something real that happens to all kinds of people (making said people feel heard in a way that maybe they hadnt before), but it also makes sure to vanquish all of these forms of trauma. and the way the trauma is vanquished isnt always beautiful and it isnt always just magically gone with a poof. the struggles of overcoming or living with that sort of thing are shown in such a real and relatable way that addresses every hardship trauma survivors have to go through. and i just. god i cry bro.

oh m y GOD and the lgbtq+ rep in this show ?? like shawty... as soon as i saw episode one i was picking up on some gay/lesbian themes but then again im sapphic and project that a lot so i tend to see that sort of stuff like... everywhere... but NE WAYS... episode ten made me FUKCING CRY BRO LIke i cant believe there was a whole trans character with a whole trans pride hoodie like LKGHKDGH my heart is just so.. so fucking full thinking about him. bc like yeah i know there are trans characters in anime but i feel like theyre always very ambiguous about actually being trans or not or erased or portrayed as a harmful stereotype or theyre constantly misgendered and still refered to as their assigned gender at birth and i hate it. HOWEVEr... Kaoru.. *chefs kiss* it was so amazing to see a character straight up say “yeah im trans” in such a casual yet powerful way bc i personally have never seen that before. and i love love loved how he went into his backstory and talked to momoe about gender bc i think thats what she rlly needed and that it helped her find herself and it makes me so happy oh my god,, and the way they talked about it never seemed forced or like it was the focal point of his existence yknow ?? like yeah he existed to help momoe overcome some of her trauma but he also just existed to be HIM yknow ?? also... personally, i headcanon momoe as a trans girl even though i dont remember it being explicitly stated plus the school scenes of her and stuff would seem like they suggest otherwise ??but,,, SHAWTY THE AMOUNT OF SUBTEXT and her complicated relationship w gender is... something i feel like a cis girl would not go through so harshly yknow ?? with all of the questioning and feeling detached from femininity or feeling like ppl dont see her as an actual girl and only like her as a guy or for her masculine traits,,, but dont take my word on this bc i myself am a cis girl but that was just my take on it as someone in the lgbtq+ community trying to educate myself on the transgender community :) either way,, wonder eggs portrayal of momoe and kaoru and the way that momoe becomes so passionate about expressing herself the way she wants to as a girl is just... good lord im gonna cry its so perfect,,,.so ... i just love this show way too much. i also am honestly super lost about the relationship btwn acca and ura-acca ?? bc i was gonna mention ura-acca as a canonically gay guy bc when i was watching i interpreted ep 11 as him being in love with acca and being jealous of Azusa (bc i mean,, they lived together (i swear to god there was only one bed in that apartment) and had a daughter together and def loved each other and also when Frill said they were husbands and then when ura-acca said he wasnt attracted to azusa but he was def jealous of their relationship ??) but then i saw somewhere that theyre brothers ?? which would make sense ig since they look kinda similar and accas daughter called ura-acca “uncle”.. but at the same time its ANIME SO THEY ALL LOOK SIMILAR and referring to gay couples as siblings is an EXTREMELY common euphemism soooo... IM JUST LOST HERE... but yeah i tried doing research and found different things so i cant say anything for sure >:( however,,, if they are canonically a lil fruity for each other... when frill refered to acca as ura-accas husband i imploded dude you never hear that sort of wording in anime.. but if theyre related i am so sorry.

god this is so much longer than i planned it to be oops but i also love the theme about like.. relying on friends to help carry your weight but at the same time not becoming completely dependent on those friends and using their support to learn how to love yourself and rely on yourself yknow ?? bc that is exactly what healthy friendships look like. bc i think ai sort of had a codependency thing goin on with koito maybe ?? but now she has a whole squad of funky friends that are so so different but all struggle with different kinds of trauma and although they fight over it, they always get through it with each other together. and they push each other no matter what to be the best versions of themselves and they teach other that getting hurt is okay because theyre always gonna be there to pick up the pieces no matter what happens. they can give each other space when they need and adapt to meet each others needs but theyre always able to balance it out with their own needs and thats such a beautiful thing in friendships especially at their age like damn i wish i had that maturity when i was 14 but no all i had was depression. another thing is that through these friendships you get to see all the different sides of each girl; you get to see them being strong or a shining light to their friends when theyre hurting but you also get to see them being hurt and weak and allowing themselves to be on the receiving end of the comfort. their friendships allows them to have weaknesses but it also allows them to highlight their strengths and thrive off of each others. I LOVE FRIENDSHIP DUDE

next i wanna briefly mention some of the themes connected to suicide that ive noticed. a big one is the survivors guilt that ai feels once koito is dead. several times she screams that she wishes she couldve gone with koito and she dreams of a “perfect world” where they committed a double suicide. one of the main reasons for her troubles is that she blames herself for koitos death and feels like it should be her thats dead... but at the same time she feels like too much of a coward to do anything now that koito is gone. she just has all these complex and contradicting feelings that wear away at her in ways that ppl that havent gone through the suicide of a loved one could never imagine. a lot of the times when things like this are portrayed in media i feel like its more in a way thats meant to guilt trip those that have taken their own lives and paint suicide as this selfish sin thats unforgivable but... not only does wonder egg reject that idea and instead portray it as a heartbreaking tragedy with,,, so so many terrible reasons, but it focuses on the feelings of ai separate from koito without blaming her in any way. not once did i feel like the show antagonized koito or that ai blamed koito for doing any of this, but they simply mourned her loss and touched on ais reaction towards the event but separate from koito herself if that makes sense. and i think that discussing survivors guilt without painting koito as the bad guy is something so beautifully done in wonder egg that can really resonate with those that have lost a loved one to suicide and have struggled with these same things.

okay i think this is the last thing ill mention,,, but HOMIE THE PARALLEL UNIVERSE BIT AT THE END. I AM. OBSESSED. i am such a whore for anything about the multiverse okay n e ways...,, not only did this make a super epic trippy ending of season one and add a little bit more magical girl whimsy to the show,, but it had such a powerful message. from the perspective of og ai,, finding out that you killed yourself in another world is... i mean its definitely not a surprise but at the same time it rlly makes you think how close og ai herself couldve been to that point and what decisions led her out of that dark place in her life. if i were in her shoes i would be terrified and id cry bc the thought of going back to such a dark place and actually going through with something like that is my worst fear and probably something that ai fears too. but at the same time,,, think from the perspective of ai two !!! like yeah its true that theres this awful terrible version of ai that dies but theres also a whole version of ai that is a superhero magical girl fighting off monsters to save countless ppls lives !! and she has a badass lizard and a gang of awesome friends !!! at first i was worried that ai two would be jealous of og ai and compare herself to her and feel inferior but like.. THEYRE LITERALLY THE SAME PERSON AND CAPABLE OF THE SAME THINGS !!! and ai two realized that !! just within the span of one episode, she went from the version of ai who took her life,, to the version of ai jumping in front of a friend to take a bullet for them and save their life. and that just inspired THE SHIT OUT OF ME. i think that ai was sent another version of herself to sort of beat her own worst enemy yknow ?? those doubts and fears that shes no good or that shes that same bystander from episode one and that she hasnt changed at all. but getting to interact with her parallel self and see her grow was just what she needed to realize that while yeah sometimes the worst thing can happen and things can be terrible but on the other hand sometimes the most wonderful thing imaginable can happen because she has the power to do either.

so im gonna go ahead and stop rambling bc i got all my thoughts out that i wanted to for this post :D but yeah lol i might make another if i feel like it sometime. long story short: this show is perfect and it is going on my favorite of all times.

#wonder egg priority #wonder egg spoilers #ai ohto #rika kawai #momoe sawaki #wonder egg priority neiru #i forgot neirus name #anime review #wonder egg ai #lgbtq anime

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