#this and maybe tomorrow will be the last art things i post in a while i think

[d0d0-b0i]

ian jr ohmygod hi !!!!

[d3n1r]

fwb: nanami kento (18+)

nanami kento doesn't know how to be just "friend's with benefits".

tags: (fem aligned user) (uses y/n) (jealousy) (not proofread also sorry this is my first real smut ive posted on tumblr) (uses the L word (gasp!))

(art for header found on pinterest)

•—————————————————————————•

fwb!nanami didn't know how to approach you, his friend and colleague, about being friend's with benefits. he wasn' the kind of man to just have sex with someone. he didn't fuck- he made love. it wasn't until gojo dug his nose in, asking you if you'd ever want a fwb within earshot of nanami- you saying you wouldn't be opposed- that made him even think to ask.

fwb!nanami who brought a bouquet of roses to your apartment the first time he came over to "netflix and chill," stumbling over his words and acting like an utter fool in front of you. it was cute, and you eased him into the situation as naturally and slowly as your body would allow. his arm was awkwardly placed on your shoulder as you nuzzled up against him on the couch, and he seemed all too focused on the movie that was playing.

"kento, do you just wanna watch the movie and try again another day?" your soft voice cooed, and it made him fall apart, the sweat on the back of his neck rolling down his back. oh god, you were so pretty. he knew he wasn't doing anything right, and yet you still looked up at him so affectionately. this isn't what friends with benefits act like, was it?

"n-no, i'm just.. i've never done anything like this before." he swallowed whatever moisture had stayed in his dry mouth, forcing himself to meet your eyes, only to meet an understanding gaze that tore down all of his walls.

"it's okay, we can go slow."

fwb!nanami who's so gentle with you during your first time together. even though you wanted your brains fucked out, his gentle touch and praise that spilled from his lips as you sunk onto his length was equally satisfying.

"you're so warm n tight, y/n.. i can't, 's too much. you feel so good," nanami groaned, his hands kneading your hips as your lips kissed along his neck, licking soothing stripes along his sensitive skin to ease him through it.

he wasn't a virgin, but still.. this. this was new. fucking someone just to fuck them. to fuck you, his gorgeous friend who had always behaved so normally towards him. would things stay normal between you two? he was already overthinking. how did friends with benefits just stay friends when all he could think about was how pretty your face twisted in pleasure, how soft your skin felt-

"kento," the sound of your sighed moan snapped him into reality, and he whimpered in his low, gentle voice, his head falling back against the couch as you rolled your hips against him. that's right- all he needed to think about right now was how good you felt milking his cock, not how your friendship was gonna turn out tomorrow.

"oh, fuck, y/n."

fwb!nanami who didn't wanna leave you that night when you fell asleep in his arms, your head resting on his chest. carefully, he carried you to bed, tucking you in while stroking his fingers through your hair.

"stay," your sleepy, mumbly voice shot an arrow through his chest just as he was trying to quietly leave your bedroom.

yes, of course he'd stay. you'd taken such good care of him, making sure he was comfortable while taking every last drop of cum he had to offer. he didn't realize how pent up he was until he unloaded into you the first time. but once your lips wrapped around him maybe an hour later, he grew more needy, thrusting his dick down your throat as he gently massaged the nape of your neck.

hesitantly he snuggled into bed with you, your sleeping form molding perfectly against his, your face subconsciously nuzzling into his chest and wrapping your arms around his waist to pull him close. were friends with benefits supposed to be this intmate? should his heart be racing like this?

but as the events of the day weighed heavier on him, he couldn't bear it, trying to find a way to fall asleep. with your steady breaths and warmth as you cuddled him it wasn't hard to get drowsy, but his thoughts consumed him. maybe this was a mistake- him and his bleeding heart.

fwb!nanami who made you breakfast the next morning. and everytime after that. he always brought you an offering like roses or flowers when he'd come over, and treat you like a queen each morning, kissing along your body to wake you up, tasting you before you'd get a taste of his cooking.

it was cathartic for him. no strings attached, just pleasure. it took him a while to understand the point in it, perhaps less stress?

though his heart still raced everytime you sat with him at work or hung out with him- not calling it a date.

"ken, you shouldn't have. we're just grabbing coffee," you whined with your face flushed red. again, this princely man bought your coffee for you and pulled out your chair as you sat at the cafe.

"i wanted to," he would say everytime, shaking his head. and he said the same when he insisted on walking you home from work, fucking you when you got home from work, massaging your muscles from the stress of work, oh lord this man was head over heels-

fwb!nanami who didn't realize he had fallen in love with you until someone at the grocery store asked for your number.

how could someone walk up to you, standing so pretty next to the shopping cart both you and him were putting groceries in, and ask if you were single? as if nanami wasn't standing right there, pushing your shopping cart, guiding you out of the traffic of other shoppers with his hand on the small of your back?

"oh, thank you, but i'm not interested in dating right now." was your response, making nanami's neck tighten. what does that mean? what were you two doing there?

you weren't dating, no. the point is that you were friends with benefits. no strings attached. just fucking, just pleasing each other. this grocery trip was as friends, the breakfasts together were as friends, the sex was as friends-

"ken," again, your voice was like the smooth, untouchable hand pulling him out of a bush full of thorns and pulling him into your softness. "did we get garlic already?"

"mhm," was the only sound to escape his throat. to hell if you were dating or not- he needed you, perhaps even more than you needed him. or at least more than you realized you needed him.

fwb!nanami who pounded you hard into the mattress that night. he was a gentle lover for the most part, always checking in on you, whispering your praises, moaning into your ear as he finished in you.

not tonight. he needed to let out that pent out rage, towards the person who asked you out of course- not you.

"who's this pretty pussy belong to, hmm?" he chuckled as he gripped your hair tighter, pressing your face down into your pillow harder. His free hand was holding your hips with a bruising grip, keeping your ass up as he fucked you into another orgasm.

"k-ken, aagh," you mewled, your hands balling into fists as you held the sheets tighter. "'m yours kento, f-fuck.."

he smiled- it was dizzying, your voice being so broken and yet so his. "that's it beautiful. all mine."

by the time he was satisfied he was dripping sweat, his chest against your back as his breath came out in ragged pants.

of course, ever the gentleman, he slowly slid his cock out from you, watching with possessiveness and satisfaction as his cum dribbled down your folds, and then your bruised thighs. a part of him felt bad for being so rough, but then watching your legs tremble and your pussy pulse around nothing made him feel much less guilty.

"lemme take care of you, pretty," he murmured, helping you stand before carrying you to the bathroom. he was so sweet, sitting down on the bench in the shower, having you on his lap facing him as he washed the sweat and mess off your body with his large yet gentle hands.

you were drowsy from the mix of getting fucked stupid and the heat of the shower, and nanami's soapy hands kneading at your flesh was only making you feel more at ease. you nuzzled your face into the crook of his neck, arms weakly wrapping around him.

"love you, ken," you murmured into his neck, eyes fluttering to try and stay open.

nanami froze, feeling an intense rush of heat rise to his face from ear to ear. he was sure that he would be the one to say it first. with how he worshipped you, he was positive that the words would leave his tongue first.

but alas there you were, softly kissing his collarbone as you fought to stay awake. his heart swelled, more than his cock as it twitched. god, he could fuck you again just for saying that. but more than that he wanted so desperately to kiss you.

"i love you too, y/n," he hummed, tilting your head up to meet your content smile, pressing his lips to yours, lovingly, as if he had never kissed you before.

[allwaswell16]

[4 pics, 4 quotes, 4 iconic 1D fics]

Iconic fics by ...

- p h d m a m a -

[1]

“Mom, he’s the only man I’ve ever loved. I’m not sure I can love anyone else the way I loved him, and no one has ever loved me better, at least, not while it was good.”

“No one’s ever hurt you that badly either, Harry,” his mother reminds him gently.

“I know. But when it was good, it was really good. I know we were young, but it was true love, Mom. It was real. And maybe, it could be that way again.”

“Kintsugi,” says Greg from the doorway, where he’s holding the squirming puppy.

All three heads in the kitchen whip around to look at him.

“What?” asks Gemma, getting up to grab the pup and give him a kiss.

“Kintsugi, it’s a traditional Japanese art form. When a piece of pottery was broken, they’d repair it with gold, to make something beautiful out of the broken pieces.” He shrugs. “Sounds like what Harry’s talking about.”

[2]

“Manscaping, you bloom ‘em, we groom ‘em. How can I help you?”

“Oh, uh,” Harry stutters, caught completely off-guard. “Oh shit, sorry, I was expecting a voicemail.”

“Well, you caught me between clients, man. How can I help? Got some hedges running wild?”

Oh my. Harry hadn’t expected that the groomer would be quite so...straight forward, but he supposes that when you’re in the business, you become very comfortable with tackling things head on, as it were.

“Uh yeah, very unruly,” he says ruefully, picturing the disaster scene he’d scrubbed down that morning.

“Is this an emergency?” The voice asks, “Like, the in-laws coming tomorrow sort of thing?”

Harry frowns. “Oh no, nothing like that,” he says finally, wondering what sort of marital relationship this gentleman has. “I’m just, you know, getting back out on the scene, want everything to be nice and neat.”

“Of course,” the voice says approvingly, “Don’t we all.”

[3]

“That’s a beautiful wand, Harry,” Liam chimes in and Harry flushes.

He’d seen Liam’s wand earlier, and it’s as magnificent as Zayn’s, made of teak, Liam had mentioned, inlaid with a mother-of-pearl floral motif, and with a huge, grass-green, clear emerald at the tip. Harry fears his own serviceable carved oak pales in comparison, but smiles his thanks.

“It’s served me well over the years,” he says, “I got it all polished up for the trip.”

He hears Louis choke on his wine a little, who then says, “Oh, really? Got it all polished, nice and special?”

Harry frowns, “Yeah, there’s a guy in Harvard Square I go to, he always does a good job,” and when Louis snickers into his drink, Harry realizes what he’s insinuating.

“Really? Wand polishing jokes? What are you, twelve?” And with that, the entire table, minus Harry, bursts out laughing while Harry sulks into his wine.

[4]

He mindlessly clicks through, sending friend requests to Zayn’s dad and sister, Liam’s mom, Cal’s mom (who’s known him since he was in diapers), and Mrs. Anderson, his old music teacher from middle school. Then the profile of a guy named Ed Twist pops up. Louis frowns, staring at the ceiling, wondering who this is. He assumes they’ve got some sort of connection, otherwise Facebook wouldn’t have offered him to Louis, and with a name like that, he’s probably an old dude. Maybe he’s a friend of Mrs. Anderson? His profile is pretty locked down, when Louis goes to look, all his photos are on private. The guy’s profile picture is of a henna tattooed hand playing the guitar, his banner is a rainbow flag, and there are a few generic posts supporting liberal causes. Huh. So maybe he’s gay, maybe he’s into music, and apparently he’s a liberal. Louis likes all those things, being gay and making music and supporting liberal causes, so without overthinking it, he clicks the “send a friend request” button.

Answers below...

[1] Feels Like Coming Home

The last thing Harry Styles expects when he's hanging out at the Someday Cafe in Somerville one rainy October day is for his ex, Louis Tomlinson to walk through the door, but that's exactly what happens. After a spectacularly ugly break-up three years prior, Harry hasn't heard one word from Louis, and he's moved on. Gotten over him. But having Louis back in his life, not to mention working at the restaurant where he's a chef, isn't easy, and the feelings that Harry thought he'd left turn out to be not so easily forgotten.

This is a story about love and the power of forgiveness, and how the hard choices we make define us, and change our lives.

[2] On the Go

From this post because I could not resist:

ok so i saw a truck today and i thought it said MANSCAPE but it actually said MAINSCAPE and it was a landscaping company. but then i thought LARRY AU. where louis owns a landscaping company called MANSCAPE and harry thinks it’s some sort of in-home pubic hair grooming company, so he calls to make an appointment, there’s some discussion of whether he wants his bushes trimmed as well, and then when it’s time for the appointment, harry’s like half-naked waiting around in a robe or something and louis shows up with lawnmowers. 

[3] It's a Better Place (Since You Came Along)

When Harry Styles, a mid-level talent, Finder, and small business owner, sets off on the vacation of a lifetime with his best friend, Niall Horan, he has no idea the changes his life will undergo over the next nine days. He's got it all planned - there's going to be shore excursions, lounging by the pool on the deck of the luxurious cruise ship, not to mention margaritas. What he does not plan for are the new friends, new bonds, or the mystery from his past that comes back to haunt him, and he certainly hasn't planned for Louis.

[4] Friend Request

This was written for Kassio as a pinch hit for the HL Summer Exchange, from the prompt: " Louis is bored on Facebook and in the “People you may know” suggestions, he sees the name Harry Styles. The profile picture doesn't show the person. He thinks it's an old family friend who he misses – maybe a middle-aged or elderly former neighbor or babysitter who he was fond of as a child - and sends a friend request. Turns out it's not old man Harry from their old neighborhood, it's hot young Harry (who he's never met before) who accepts his friend request..."

[moirindeclermont]

Daily thread about BridgertonS3: I'm in a "mood" today so... Let's do carriage scene vs mirror scene, what do you think?

To be clear this is not about putting one against the other. I love them both dearly. This is just a fun game (and an excuse to go and rewatch them both, let's be honest)

First of all, the parallels. I've seen a post of both scene side by side and so many actions and details are the same... Too much to think it's a coincidence, maybe they were both choreographed in a similar way? It's like those scenes are mirroring (aha!) each other.

Secondly, the carriage scene is all about urgent and desires that come to life. Everything is a rush, and you notice because Pen is not as shy and reserved like in the mirror scene. It's all about the moment and they'd definitely would go all the way in if the carriage didn't stop.

The mirror scene is all about intimacy, a reaffirm of their connection. It's slower and, of course, there is the additional level of being naked in front of each other and taking the next steps in that journey. Being less urgent, nerves and shyness crept in but they are handled in the best way possible.

Things that make me go insane each time in both scenes: the explicit consent (I'll do a thread about this tomorrow I think), their giggle at the end, their facial expressions, the sounds (yeah, I know I'm basically saying everything... Bear with me)

I love the progressione of all scenes (including the last one) as a tool to also understand their dynamic in the relationship. While Pen never is without agency, by the end she is the one guiding their intimacy. It's a discover of self through intimacy and love and it's so beautiful to see.

Lastly, it's endearing and gorgeous the way they are "Both connected to the moment of each other. To love. And as I have suggested before in this class, art is love made public." (Sense8, S2e01)

Gif: @polinsated

[boxheadpaint]

oh god when did i diary post last. Well as good a time as any

another year older today, though birthday festivities are actually taking place yesterday and tomorrow due to conflicting schedules and hannukah party stuff. spending this last week of DEMBER watching found footage / mockumentary horror and doing my best not to worry as much as usual to varying levels of success. still need to get refill on blood pressure meds because sleep is annoying again thanks.

joycon controller journey where in the end i grab those ergonomic ones which they only had the pokemon print ones in stock but theyre very nice. they make my switch wide and intimidating and it doesnt hurt to use which im not sure why i ever got used to that for normal joycons? I can take a few guesses though namely being yay videogames and being good at ignoring pain until its gone for a bit.

waiting back for exciting surgery news though knowing state health that wont be for a while! in the mean time just gonna look at fish and have a beautiful time. didnt actually super celebrate christmas this year, stayed home with partner. did have a gift from my mom (MICHEAL FATCAT VOLUME 2 LETS FUCKING GO. And a book on color combinations) for it and another for my birthday (immensely sexy natural illustration book) which was very nice and makes me happy. since she moved to mexico our schedules dont line up as well from timezones but the few calls we have had are nice. she got a puppy that made me cry over video from the smallness.

at this point i miss digital art enough that i am willin to brave the overheating and bluescreening of my surface again but maybe instead i could set up some stand made of welded paperclips or something so it can sit up and breathe again. Mom gave me her old one but its windows 11, then theres the yogas that doug has where one doesnt work with my pen and says ACTIVATE WINDOWS in the corner because it was probably some sensitive work thing while the other yoga has like. a mystery charger we have yet to find. we will likely try to downgrade moms from the windows 11 shit as best we can but god im not confident in it.

Every month i think i need to stop worrying about what people will think of my art, that their interpretations dont matter and i am doing what makes me happy and what keeps me interested. i also manage to forget this every month around the same time. i miss drawing very very quickly to make stupid funny pictures for people, its a lot better at conveying how i feel and think than trying to pull from my limited vocabulary. written words are basically just another kind of picture that are funny and dont make any sense in any order you say them and will never get across what you are trying to say.

okami HD was 5 dollars on the switch. its been a lot of fun to play through it again after all this time- when i was a kid i thought after orochi i beat the game and that whatever else was going on was a weirdly long postgame. i stopped at the VERY near end of act 2 because of the fucking blockhead warrior guy was impossible for me. i was trying to get footage of the weakpoints on a flipphone with my family behind me like mission control. now that im an adult man with reading comprehension and a smaller screen with a built in screencapture function im sure i will get just as mad as i did back then.

12/28/2024, I keep accidentally not hydrating enough day-to-day and i still need a shower. gonna go fuckin water mode

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

Hi maggots... I have to go out for an entrance exam in a half hour but here I am, stealing a while to talk to you all. I don't know, why are we always making time for the things that are important and using time for the things we have to do but always stealing time for what we want to do? What is wasting time, anyway? I don't know. I don't know much at all.

I made the mistake of playing a new song while typing this first bit. It's Birch, by Big Red Machine and Taylor Swift. Do new songs ever make you feel a bit nervous but excited, like you're experiencing some emotion for the first time and reading a book or watching a movie and you don't quite know how it will end and where it will take you on the way? It's not the kind of thing you do lightly. Well, I mean, it's not the kind of thing I can do lightly. I'll have to listen to it again, while I'm not here writing.

This counts, doesn't it, as writing? Why do I have to be writing my book or a poem or a song for it to be real writing? I'm putting words together and I'm putting them together for us, for you and me. God we make ourselves feel guilty with so many arbitrary definitions.

A familiar song is playing now, The Alcott by The National and Taylor Swift. I think their voices meld together beautiful, gritty and smooth. I think Swift is a skilled singer-songwriter, as well as a performer. I think a lot of things.

Why am I writing an entrance exam? Well, writing is an exaggeration, it'll involve sketching and maybe an interview. It's for an art school. The design school I got into, which I told you all about and was thinking of not doing, well, that got messy. They were... not very polite about a scholarship that they'd said they'd give. And I can't risk going to a situation like my last college. I don't wanna sully this post with it (how do I use words like wanna and sully next to each other, I really cannot pick a way to use this language) but well. It wasn't fun. I don't want to be an unfriendly/unsafe environment if I can help it.

Am I excited or nervous for the exam? Not really. Too many things have happened to leave any room for that. It's mainly resignation, a sort of oh, is this what's happening now? ok. That's sad. But I still care about things, I promise. Not the things I used to, like academics or grades or some abstract future. I care about you. I care about you so much. I think about you all the time. I care about my mum and my dog. About stickers and Good Omens and Sherlock Holmes and music and books.

It's a different kind of caring.

I have ten minutes left. I need to shower and pack my things in that time. I'm cutting it fine. Like a slice of whale. Some of you are confused by that. A lot of you are thinking Asmi, no, no, no. That makes me smirk. A fine slice of whalegina, loves.

I'll tell you all about it one day (hush, those of you still desperately thinking Asmi, no with a mixture of horror and fascination).

It's the sixth of May here. 2024, for those of you who've lost track of years. A Monday. Tomorrow is my twentieth birthday. So many things are happening in my life, not all of them good, but what's always good is you. It's us.

We're good. We're always good. I love you. So much.

I promise, maggots. We're more than friends, we're family. And to whoever it is reading this, maggot, even if we've never spoken, I care about you. Because you took the time to read this. You took the time to care. I care, too. I care about you.

I'll go shower now, in a bit of a rush, but smiling. Because of you. Because of all of you.

Love, Asmi

[jmdbjk]

Bangtan weekly report

I hope everyone is having a great day so far. It's been a busy week/weekend for Bangtan.

Hobi's Hope On The Street album dropped on Friday and I got my ass to Target first thing to get it!

The album is amazing, as I knew it would be. Hobi continues to amaze me. I'm struggling to find the right words to express how I feel about him. As I told my bestie, Hobi is the blood and bones of BTS. Namjoon might be the big brain lyricist, the leader and Yoongi might be the constant melody maker and realist, but Hobi makes the whole thing come alive and beat with movement.

The first two episodes of the HOTS docu-series were also amazing. To hear and see him delving so deeply into the thing that makes him who he is and therefore makes BTS what it is brought tears to my eyes.

The Hope On The Street Pop Up location in Seoul is an overwhelming success as were the parties that Hobi threw for fans in LA, Chicago and NYC.

Items from his Hybe studio are on display at the Seoul pop up event and merch that is available there might be the same that will be available on April 9 on Weverse Shop.

Neuron dance lessons were being conducted today and look like they are being filmed. Maybe they will end up in a future Bangtan Episode! If you'd like to see more of what's inside the pop up, you can view this thread on X.

(image from @ddaisyy94 on X)

Yoongi has entered the Nonsan Training Center, the same one where Namjoon and Tae did their basic training. Yoongi's basic training will last 3 weeks and then he will return to his alternate service assignment. He looks so good! (sarcasm)

And it was mentioned that Jin accompanied Yoongi on this day. Jin wasn't going to let Yoongi enter military basic training without having his only hyung in the group see him off.

Speaking of Jin, his Weverse post for March was 77 DAYS LEFT!

Jimin has made a scholarship available at the Department of Physical Therapy at Dongeui Science University in Busan. According to the information, Jimin made this donation prior to enlisting. Physical therapists are important in his and the members' lives to keep them healthy while performing at such high levels.

Taehyung was spotted at a soccer match in Chuncheon. He was with a group of fellow soldiers in uniform. However, also present were Manager-nim and several recognizable Hybe security guys. Interesting.

Namjoon shared some moments from his weekend with us. I will assume he is taking his proper holiday now that he's past the 100-day mark of enlistment. He visited Sorol Art Museum in Gangneung, he hugged the sky at a beach, smelled the cherry blossoms and was lurking in and about the Hybe building because he saw a banner from Army. It's possible the banner was installed by the owner of a nearby restaurant.

Hiding his beard stubble with hotteok:

Stopping to smell the flowers during his time off:

Hugging the sky at the beach:

And I can't leave my precious Kookie off this week's report. We don't know if he and Jimin have taken the vacation that is due them now that they've also passed the 100-day milestone of their enlistment. They've completed just over 20% of their obligation as of yesterday/today and tomorrow they will be promoted to Private First Class II.

We've seen more pics of Bam than of JK this year.

(photo from @holicare.barf on Instagram)

[moonbear-from-space]

SPOILERS FOR VENOM THE LAST DANCE!!

Okay I just saw it today and at first I was not okay, very much not okay. However after having time to mellow out and think more about it and seeing some other people's opinions about it, I can think more clearly about it.

Do I think this is queer baiting/bury your gays? No I don't think so at all. I should also mention please for the love of god do not go and harass or send death threats to any of the actors, writers or anyone that worked on this movie! We don't need to be known as another fandom going after creators and bringing them hell. It has happen too many times so please think twice before doing anything like that. You are allow to be critical not hateful.

Anyways that being said. Venom sacrificed themselves for the greater good of the world. The relationship in the comics is already cannon we don't need to prove a point, these movies at the end of the day are made for mass appeal for anyone to watch. And while yes I was very upset that it happen and it broke my heart. Not all hope is lost, the second last post credit scene shows a black cockroach which may or may not be Venom. So perhabs this isn't Venom last dance, there was that whole this its just a goodbye for now or something like that. Besides Venom is a popular character I really doubt there just gonna kill them off that easily, we may not get another Venom movie as far as I know (unless the rumors are true about this animated Venom movie in the works) however Venom may appear in other big Marvel crossover movies perhabs.

I do wish there were some moments like saying words like I love you or something. But those are just small nitpicks. So many symbiotes showed up as well I couldn't fully tell who was Lasher but yay Agony was there. ^_^

But yea at the end of the day we still have the comics we still make comforting fan art and fix it fics for all of our troubles but just know that this is a PG-13 movie they only do so much. I know we all wanted some big romantic scene but the subtext is still there and Venom wanting to sacrifice themself to save the world is a nobel act.

There's probably more things I can add to it but I just know tumblr is gonna riot over this maybe. But I will say this if I had a nickel for everytime Venom shows up in a third installment of a Marvel movie where Venom dies followed by big explosions I would have two nickels which is weird that it happen twice but also why the hell didn't Raimi Venom show up?? Like come on not even one post credit scene for him to be in? I guess him and his other are really dead... :/ or there lost in that void place or something like that.

Anyhoo besides that it will motivate me more to work on the second volume of my own Venom comic. Thank you for reading my thoughts and ramblings about this. :]

Let me know what you think about it, but for now I gotta get ready for a conversation to go to for tomorrow but before that gonna relax and play some SonicXShadow Generations for the time being. I will also be cosplaying as Raimi Venom lol, hoping it will turn out well. :>

[py-dreamer]

Ooop- so it's almost mid september...

Y'know what that means?

Yea so we have a return of the stickers!!!

Well less stickers and kinda whatever this is Ig

Don't get me wrong I'm still super proud of it! I suppose it was meant to be like stickers from last year but it kinda escalated and sort off got a wee bit out of hand...

...just a tad bit...

Woooh! So anyone who's in the KNY hotpot might recognize this style and yes I did basically use the KNY birthday art format but COME ON!!!

IT'S SO CUTE!!!

LOOK AT MAH BOIII SITTING ON THAT CAKE!!!

I JUST WANNA NOM BIG BITE!!!

(If you can't tell I do really like this cake art)

I promise this time it is really 10 days till my actual birthday unlike the whoopsie 11 I did last year -_-'

And I know it's not Mk's birthday even though it looks like it is, I know. But it's the bloody format of the art and Idk how else to change it. Besides I think they slay in those birthday outfits.

And it was fun to do my sticker style in a bigger thing!

But Idk if it's cause I haven't touched my bloody stylus in ages or I've been swimming in the KNY hotpot for too long BUT WHY WAS MK'S FACE SO HARD TO DRAW FROM THE FRONT VIEW!!!

I HAD TO COMPROMISE, MANS LOOKING TOWARDS THE SIDE!!!! LIKE XIAOTIAN I LOVE YOU AND WANT TO SQUEEZE THEM CUTE LIL CHEEKS OF YOURS BUT WHY ARE YOU SO HARD TO DRAW FROM THE FRONT!??!?

HE LOOKED LIKE A BLOODY CAT WITH SLIT EYES Y'ALL!!!

Oml...regardless, I did have a lot of fun with this and had lots of fun with the decorations and such. If you were here last year, your keen memory and astute eye might notice that the cake is the same cake I used in the 'shenanigans in space' birthday stickers I did last year!

@leesbian42, @cats-and-confusion remember that lol?

So the tiny memory flower thing and star candies are an homage to that :)

(btw, pssttt @emerialyncodevenice I know we haven't talked in a while but you mentioned that you liked the bloomin cake and was thinking of using it. Feel free to use this if you like, Idk how just credit me m'kay?)

But anyways, if y'all wanna use this pic, again. Pls credit me.

AND NO REPOSTING PLEASE!!!

The decorations are meant to be sugar cookies and idk what the icing is. Since I'm thinking more of an east asian fruit cake (those really really soft fluffy spongy ones) I was thinking more like light yellow dyed whipping cream and less buttercream.

Maybe even some kinda custard Idk...(does custard go well with cake?)

The orange chunks are meant to be like mango balls or chunks and hopefully the red thingys in the middle read across as strawberries

I had to include the Monkey king plush, he's just so little!

I was tempted to draw in the other characters as plushies since they are as important to MK probably but it's getting late and I'd already been working on this baby for like 3 hours already.

All in all, I do really like this and ngl, pray this doesn't flop.

I know my single stickers don't always do well but pls y'all I like this very much...

It is nice to compare this year's work and last year and I am proud to say I have improved at least somewhat

And as for why I rarely post, well I've gotten back from my holiday but sadly I'm at that age where work and stuff will be my main focus for the time being.

Got a lot of assignments and tests y'know...

(hell I have one due the 17th and tests to do tomorrow and here I am faffing on about legos on tumblr)

And like I said, I have been blipping and dabbing in demon slayer, read a lot more KNY fics lately (I actually have a mini sketch of kamaboko squad as hashiras, heavily inspired off of other designs but even so-, if I'm in the mood I might post that!)

But enough yapping, I'll try my best to keep up this 10 days thing

(if you don't know up till my birthday for 10 days I try to post a sticker or thingy like this one)

no promises since I am busier this year but this was a lot of fun so you'll definitely see some stuff.

(I just realized I have to keep up this level of detail in my other stuff T^T save meeeeeee plsssss)

[oh-no-its-bird]

YOU!!!!!!

[Grabs you by the collar and shakes you]

Youuuuu...

I was scrolling around at way too late at night and saw one of your posts, and I love your posts, so I went to your blog, and bing bada boom, I see the Izuna in Wonderland post and I read through it. I enjoy the writing and the ideas and the art (how dare you be good at both writing and art (affectionate)) and I reach the end and that last drawing.

The one where Madara is like "oh yeah only the Senju could heal u so we have a peace treaty with them now-" That fucking drawing of Madara, has grabbed my by the balls and refused to let go, what the fuck.

He looks so fucking soft and sleepy but like in an unhealthy sick Victorian child way. He looks like he would tell me not to go to school tomorrow bc he likes me but I'd go anyway bc what he really means is like hey take a mental health day bc school is hell, he's just too sleep deprived to realize(care) how evil he sounds. He looks like he either has hair the texture of burnt straw or the fluffiest softest hair imaginable, no in between. He looks like he gives great hugs but could (and would and has) also use those hugs to suffocate someone to death. He looks like a sneeze could kill him and also he is the creator of every virus known to man.

It's the fucking soft yet untamed hair, the creasing and maybe slight puffiness around his eye, the slight coloring (redness I assume) to his nose, the sweat that might be nervousness, might be him having literally worried himself sick at his brother's side and now he has a fever.

I already liked the way you drew Madara, I like all your Madara drawings, but for some reason, this one broke something in me and I can't stop myself from wanting to write fanfiction while spinning this specific Madara around in my head like a rotisserie chicken. Idk if what I'm saying makes sense, it's late, I'm tired, I barely slept last night. I just want you to know that this Madara drawing now lives in my head rent free and if I ever get around to writing the various TobiMada fics in my head, this is how I will imagine him.

Also, love how draw Hashirama too. He looks like a Mii character that got ROM hacked to have a Battle Cats face. And also how grumpy and low effort Tobi looks in here too, his more detailed design is great too. Also I like how you draw Izuna- BASICALLY, I LOVE ALL YOUR CHARACTER DESIGNS, THIS ONE JUST BROKE ME FOR SOME REASON. I'M GONNA STOP WRITING NOW, I NEED TO SLEEP.

I'm fucking crying actually thank you??????? Nicest thing anyone's ever told me about my stuff, I'm gonna explode wtf

Also I can tell you haven't slept in a while so oh my god go do that

Pls take this quick Madara in thanks, I tried to do my best to draw him how I did in the Izuna in Wonderland comic but idk if I did him justice

I've been struggling to find a good way to draw him consistsntly, so I will internalize what u have told me and try to keep that sickly Victorian man energy going forward

[l00ney-m00ny]

"The people you think love you dont exist, not really"

...

A drawing I made based on the concept of the lonely. I listen to TMA while I do art, and as you saw with the last 2 peices it is quite in your face so I wanted to do something more subtle. Would do alt text description like usual, but I am posting from mobile so I am unable to add that at the moment. Will add it tomorrow if I get the chance.

This one is more subtle, like I intended. I thought maybe it could also be a Vast thing? But I think it just gives off more of a lonely vibe. I want to do some more subtle ones that I can show my grandparents without being too in-your-face bc of how religious they are. Anyways, let me know what you think!

*I did forget to sign it so I'll do that tomorrow when I add the alt text.

edit* did it!

[sugudoe]

Hiii ❤️ Id love a matchmaking if its still open!

As for info, I just graduated from art school at uni, my MBTI is ENTJ, if you are into astrology im a Taurus Sun Leo moon, I dunno the others lol.

I tend to be a tad picky with people, and maybe unwillingly a bit mean whenever someone is slow, but overall im very unconditionally giving in my current rs, even if i tend to do other connections as a bit transactional, I enjoy surrounding myself with ambitious people, success is goal (even if morally grey💀)

I do dance in my free time, i have a huge collection of clothes, bags, ascesaories, etc, as well as doing powerlifting for those muscle mommy gains, so health is super important to me. I play all kinds of videogames too, which i enjoy doing competitive and ranked a lot :)

hello, love! you seem so badass!! 🤍 super important, this one actually reminded me of a gojo one shot i’ll be posting tomorrow, so this focus on satoru’s love language i decided to use as an opening before my one shot. ps: sorry for only one pairing, i’ll be doing this from time to time unless i get confused on pairings — i have other works to post and the matchmakings are for fun, hope u guys understand.

✶ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: gojo satoru

You are meant for success, that’s something in your aura everyone senses — you are going to be the greatest. For Gojo Satoru, you were his achievement. Not in a have you as his trophy type of way, au contraire, he wanted to be yours.

Gojo sees how you are always surrounded by the most influential people, all eating from the palm of your hands, he wants to do the same. Satoru thinks there is nothing better to get them him — the strongest, head of the Gojo clan, bank account filled beyond the unlimited mind could think of.

Unknown to the male, he didn’t need to put himself on the spotlight to get your attention, your eyes had always been set on him, you were going to make him yours in just a matter of time. He easily accepted.

The first thing Gojo buys for you is a large original painting from your favorite artist, he thinks one of the walls in your apartment would look better with it, he is right. It’s a little thing he does, decorating any empty space with something you adore, not noticing the metaphor for your walls being you and this gifts being his love and devotion to you.

Satoru has a thing for your mean version. He loves to be by your side when you snap some rude comments, but he loves even more to be the target of your irritation. There is a thing you do (maybe moving your hair, maybe clicking your tongue, or your pretty mad face), he is all so mesmerized by it.

None of your fights last long, you sprint out of the shared apartment, mostly to go to your dance classes or the gym to relieve the anger. When you come back hours later, stress by the door and tiredness washing over your sweaty body, Satoru is always waiting with a smirk in his face and something to spoil you with.

Most of the time, designer clothes and bags to add to your collection in the closet. Sometimes a diamond necklace he catches you sighing for. This time, he just made dinner, your favorite. You smile gently and kiss his cheek before taking a much needed shower, when returning, still happy and eating while both apologize, Gojo gets you up from the chair.

You both slow dance, against your aching muscles and sleepy eyes, you are so focused you barely notice how Satoru whispers in your ear — “Marry me?”

Turns out, you still got a gift, a beautiful ring.

──── ✎ ° ⋆ FUN FACTS.

◛ ₊· Gojo and you some times have to deal with people making comments about his gift giving love, saying you are a gold digger. That’s the only moment you don’t have to snap, your fiancée does it for you — “Oh, whatever I give Y/n, they can give themselves, I just rather be the one doing it.”

◛ ₊· You spoil him as well, let it be an immense amount of sweets, fancy sunglasses designed for only him or to threaten the high ups and giving your lover vacation.

◛ ₊· Gojo likes to propose to you at least once every three months, you do some grandee thing, an amazing achievement or you just look particular cute that day, and he is again asking you to marry him.

◛ ₊· Satoru can’t wait to spend the rest of his life with you, seeing you with white hair is his goals in life, to have you both matching.

◛ ₊· Canonically, Gojo is good at everything he does, that’s why he doesn’t have a job. After meeting you, and your love for videogames, you both learn he sucks at them. So, some date nights is just the two of you in your large game room. You winning easily and he dramatically whining.

[kinetic-elaboration]

May 16: Daria/Jane, Kiss

Daria/Jane, ~900 words, ~35 minutes

In the same 'verse as this fic, but it also takes place before so like, post-canon, basically. This was inspired by a comment from/conversation with @riotsquirrrl on that fic about how D and J might have gotten together. I really liked it, so I decided to play around with it.

How can it be that Daria thinks it's cold enough for snow and yet Jane's not wearing anything as heavy as a real jacket? It's because Daria is from the South and doesn't understand what cold is or what almost-snow feels like either. So.

*

The forecast says snow flurries but the air feels like incipient heavy snow, as bitter-cold as it is when Daria opens the door and steps outside. These are the last flickering days of the year, the in-between time, the neighborhood dark by 5pm and illuminated only by streetlights. She stands in the cone of light from the Morgendorffer's front-door light and shrugs her shoulders up toward her ears, crosses her arms against her chest, and Jane pulls the sleeves of her red BFAC sweatshirt all the way over her hands.

She'd volunteered to walk Jane out but not all the way home, so there's no reason now to linger out here in the cold, breathing out faint misting gray breaths, thinking about how it won't really snow, not in Lawndale in December. It never has.

But Jane just shifts her weight from one foot to the other, glances out in the direction of the sidewalk and then back. "Hey--so." She mimics Daria's posture, crossed arms to hold in body heat. "Thanks for letting me hang out all night and avoid my house."

"Thank you for distracting me from having to spend time alone with my family." A half-joke, and Jane half-smiles at it. They're not so bad, really. She's just not so used to being home, as if she'd traveled back from Boston in a time machine and now she's in high school again, Quinn telling stories about the same teachers, the same gossip, the same football team. As if Daria's four months at Raft never happened. As if time had shifted in some jarring, abrupt way, but only for her. Only somewhere in her body, in her consciousness.

"Could be worse," Jane answers. Could be her place. Wind's moved back in, half-taken over. Trent won't last the year with him, though he hasn't admitted it yet. And Jane's mom has been away for six months now, the sort of absence that must make even Jane wonder if she'll ever come back, and as far as Daria has ever been tell, Mr. Lane has never really lived there at all.

Maybe familiarity is better. At least she has somewhere to come home to.

"What are you doing tomorrow?" she asks. She means it as a lifeline but selfishly, too.

Jane shrugs. "Sleeping. Painting."

"Busy schedule. Do you think you can find time for pizza?"

"I might be able to pencil that in." The corner of one side of her mouth lifts up again, a smirk but, because it's just them alone, there's softness to it. "I should go."

"Yeah."

For a while now, maybe a couple of months, Jane's been in the habit of kissing Daria on the cheek when they part ways. The reason why has never been obvious, and Daria has stopped trying to remember quite when it started, or what she thought of it then. Maybe Jane does it because separating always feels so much more weighty now, when they won't see each other for days or possibly weeks, instead of hours. Maybe the gesture comes from how much more often they touch, now: jostled together on the subway; falling asleep in each other's dorms; leaning on each other sometimes, when they study side by side in the same bed. Or maybe it's an art school thing, or just part of Jane changing and growing, in some more abrupt or sudden or meaningful way than she did in high school--some change in her that somehow Daria can't see in its entirety or fully understand.

She likes it, though, this new sort of ritual. Never knows how to respond, never initiates, but likes it. When Jane doesn't do it, she always thinks, well that's over now, and then is pleasantly surprised when the habit picks itself up again. Last time, she reached out after and squeezed Jane's arm, just before they parted at the train station in Boston, which was her attempt at speaking the same language back.

But this is Lawndale and it's different here. They're nineteen; they're fifteen; the world is very small, the neighborhood familiar even in the darkness. Flakes of snow too light to even count as flurries are getting caught in Jane's hair.

Somewhere in the direction of the neighbor's lawn, some sound like the movements of an aggressive squirrel rattles through the stillness. "I'll see you tomorrow," Jane says, and Daria turns away from the noise just as Jane leans in to kiss her cheek, and the kiss lands on the side of Daria's mouth instead.

She turns very slightly to her left, like a correction, but doesn't otherwise move. Doesn't pull back, doesn't press forward.

Interesting.

Jane steps back again, blinks a few times; her eyes are unusually wide. "Sorry about that," she says.

Daria shakes her head. "Don't be."

And then Jane's shoulders fall back down, and she laughs like she's letting out some coiled-up nerves. "All right. Tomorrow, then."

"I'll stop by."

Maybe she should be doing something else now, saying something else. Jane leans in one more time and this time kisses her cheek, like she'd meant to, and then she sticks her hands in the front pocket of her hoodie and starts off down the front walk. Daria stays outside and watches her, moving in and out of the brightest lights, until she disappears at last down the street.

[daz4i]

ok now i'm at home in bed and can make a proper post with all my thoughts. gushing abt personal stuff and possibly getting into sensitive territory here and there under the cut

today was really nice 🥹

i love our group i'm so glad i got to meet them i'm so glad they are a part of my life

everything went well. i'm honestly. extremely proud of myself for making it through this entire process, and not giving up like i at times wanted to. the last few weeks where my role was tweaked a little were super fun and today was the highlight, like seeing and hearing the audience clap even when i did just the littlest things was so. satisfying

after the show lots of people, including complete strangers, came up to me and told me i was great and that i was both funny and touching and they loved my part, i got so many hugs ahdjkflg 😭😭😭 beyond the clapping and laughter i got during the show which were already nice 🥹

the show itself was received better than i expected, and i started liking it more in recent weeks too hehe. we leaned into the campiness of it even more and it made it so much more fun to experience

it reminded me how much i love theater and how much i love being on a stage and not to sound spiritual or w/e but i truly was meant for this like this is what i'm supposed to be doing. i hope i can some day do it for money lol enough to make a living at least :P

. my whole body hurts (fr this show was so much exercise for my lazy ass 😩) but it's a good kind of hurt? bc it comes with satisfaction. hope i don't regret saying this tomorrow :P

in addition to playing in the show i was also somewhat of an assistant director lol. both our director and someone from the management team who was involved in the process mentioned it to my mom separately, like our director praised me for this and said my insight was always helpful and that i had great ideas omg 😭 this entire time i was worried that i'm like. taking over too much or smth bc i always had shit to say abt everything fr :P but ig it was received well 🙏 here and there i gave comments to other actors too to remind them stuff or correcr certain movements or lines and i was always worried it annoyed them but. they never got mad at any point. so maybe i can accept that i'm allowed to take space and offer my insight and not only will nothing bad happen, but good things will happen even hehe.

so this is where i get into the sensitive stuff i mentioned. bc if you follow me then you probably know my mental state is Not Great to say the least. and while i did have a lot of anxiety today (even got 2 pieces of somewhat bad news during the day which ofc were both huge bummers) i didn't think abt wanting to die even once. at some point my mean brain tried to bring it up and i managed to shut it down immediately which practically never happens (even when i'm having fun with friends it usually takes a bit more time for me to shake the thought away). which is kind of amazing and also another confirmation that i should be doing this more probably. i think

and. i mentioned being proud of myself. that's also smth that never happens but my aforementioned mean brain can't argue this time bc i absolutely objectively DO have the right to be proud of myself for everything i've done

less than one year ago i barely went out, maybe twice a week at most. the only people i met regularly were my parents (bc. i live with them lol) and my close friends. now i go out 4 times a week at the minimum and i interact not only with my fellow actors but other people in the art program as well, i use public transport which i basically never did since i was like. in high school. and talk to strangers even though I'm still terrified

i didn't just go on a stage but allowed myself to be filmed and managed to look at pictures of myself from the dress rehearsal despite having Issues™️ with this sort of thing. being seen wasn't bad. it was good even. i didn't feel as self conscious about the whole thing as i usually do basically

it's kind of amazing to see how much i've changed tbh. achieved. i didn't think smth like this could happen, let alone so quickly (and during. a literal war. that obviously didn't help anyone's mental state)

like. i mentioned being proud of myself. and this is a part of it, doing things that are so huge for someone like me and compared to who i usually am. but i think even compared to a normal person, i did a pretty damn good job that most people don't normally do, and i absolutely earned the right to feel good for the work i put in

^even thinking this is like chewing glass for me so this is ALSO an achievement actually. me feeling good about myself i mean. feeling pride. acknowledging my own success. makes me look back at other things i do/did that others are proud of me for and go "huh. i guess they're right" even tho i denied it before

idk. maybe i'll get a major adrenaline crash and forget these feelings tomorrow. maybe they'll last for a few days. maybe they'd even make a long term mark! who knows! i guess we can only hope (realistically speaking, the way i know myself, it won't stick :P but who knows. maybe just like i am currently building myself and my life little by little, i'll keep accumulating successes like this little by little too, solidify my self esteem a bit more at a time lol

idk how to finish this post. uh. if you read this i'm kissing you on the mouth. i'd say i hope i don't sound too conceited but nah i earned the right to be so anyway 🧐 no one gets to tell me otherwise

[nangel]

Paparazzi, part ten

✍︎ word count | 5378 words

✈︎ missing out parts? | series , part 1 , part2 , part 3 , part 4 , part 5 , part 6 , part 7 , part 8 , part 9

Sometimes things need to go wrong first before they can go right

As Olga and I said, we wouldn’t go home alone so it was no wonder that when I woke up, Jobas, the blonde guy was lying next to me. I smirked to myself because I enjoyed it. I was young and I actually lived my life. I turned to the side still covered in his bedsheet. He was still sleeping and I thought back. I clearly enjoyed the last night. Maybe I was into one night stands. I smirked again and sat up gathering my clothes together from the floor before putting them on again as quiet and quickly as possible. I walked out of the bedroom and saw Olga doing the same. “Escaping?” i asked her smirking and she nodded running a hand through her hair. “Let’s go” i said amused and we quickly got out of here. Outside we went for a smoke while walking. “So…how was Jobas doing?” she asked smirking and I loved. “Good…he knows what he is doing” i said amused. “Shit…you are into it” she said amused. “Yeah” i said laughing. “How was Mark?” i added smirking. “A dream” she said smirking. “I never thought we would end up like that” i said amused. “Yeah right…but I’m glad we did” she said nudging me which made me laugh. I saw the mail from Dior and my face immediately lit up. It was the perfect timing, I would go to the Dior meeting and at the same time we would visit an exhibition about arts, some students of the art university in Paris would show their works there and introduce them which me and Maureen wanted to visit. It was in four days so we had time.

Olga called the phase I had right now going-slutty even tho she was sleeping around more than me. I came back from a wild night and was pretty annoyed. “There she is…” Olga said relieved as I approached the cafe since they were already doing brunch. “Sorry girls” i said sitting down. “We were waiting for you! Where were you?” Annabelle asked patting the seat next to her. “I wanted you to go when I woke up but this fool caught me and made me drink three coffees with him” i said exhausted. “What?” Maureen asked laughing. “Yeah…he woke up somehow and then saw me as I wanted to leave” i said annoyed and they laughed. “Shit happens, huh?” Olga asked laughing at me. “Yeah and now I know everything about his ex girlfriend and his cats” i said pretty triggered. Maureen laughed at me and I rolled my eyes. “What about Charles?” Annabelle asked. “What should be?” i asked confused. “After Thursday you told us nothing” she said. “Yeah we need gossip” Maureen said. “Well…he called me two times and I hung up after talking for like one minute…he called me in the last days but I don’t care” i said shrugging my shoulder. “I knew it” Maureen said and Annabelle nodded. “What?” Olga asked and I looked we looked at her confused. “And as always, no one tells me anything” she said taking a bite of her bacon-muffin. “Complicated” i said and she shrugged her shoulders. “I hope so…tomorrow we are going to Paris again” Maureen said and I nodded. “I hope this is gonna be fun” Olga said and I patted her shoulder. “You’ll get through it” i said softly and she rolled her eyes at me. I joined the brunch and started eating too before I would go to the gym.

I posted that in my story as soon as we were in the plane before taking off. I would meet Candice there too. I was watching Ratatouille while we flew since it wasn’t a long flight.

As we landed we immediately checked in in our hotel. “Merci” i said to the woman on the Reception as I took the card we got. We would only stay for today, tomorrow and Wednesday so everything was planned out into detail. Today me and Maureen would meet up with Candice, to get some model support. “What are you guys doing?” i asked as I put on my basic black high heels. “We don’t know yet” Annabelle said. “We’re gonna find something” she said smirking and we nodded before saying goodbye. As soon as we were outside of the hotel we called us a taxi to get to our appointment as soon as possible. “I’m kinda nervous” Maureen said. “Everything’s gonna go as planned” i said smiling and she nodded. “You are slowly turning into your mother” she said amused and I laughed. “My mom is the best” i said amused and she agreed.

We arrived at the restaurant and searched for Candice which wasn’t hard cause as soon as she walked out of the taxi on the other side of the street we noticed a lot of people running up to her which she ignored to walk to us in her blue jeans, the black leather crop top and her jacket. “How do they always know where celebrities are?” Maureen asked me and I just shrugged my shoulders watching Candice walk up to us. “I’m adored” Maureen said and I just nodded. “Hey girls…the traffic…” she said and we waved it off. “It’s great to finally meet you” she said and I held my hand out introducing myself which Maureen did too. “Let’s not waste more time…I’m starving” she said and we walked. “How do they always know where you are?” i asked Candice. “A good question…which I can’t really answer” she said laughing. We sat down and ordered drinks and food. “You two are doing a good job…the fashion industry is going to fight for you” she said as she took a sip of her water. “You think so?” i asked her and she nodded. “Oh yeah…I heard only good things but what would you expect…Well models are unique goods and they are always looking out for them…normally it takes much longer but you two have so much luck” she said and Maureen and I looked at each other. “ You could say so” i said. “If you’ve got your first walk for a brand the projects are running…” she said and we nodded. “They pay you good too” she said and I nodded. “Yeah we already got paid for the shooting” i said. “How much?” she asked. “500” Maureen said and Candice nodded. “Fair enough” she said as our lunch came. While she talked to us we couldn’t even take our eyes off her, we were clearly adored. She gave us a lot of tips snd advices which meant really much to us. She even told us how we carry ourselves the best.

After dinner we walked outside to get back home, Candice was next to us and as soon as we wrestled outside there were a lot of Paparazzi’s. “They are in Paris too?” i asked shocked. “They are everywhere” Maureen cursed and Candice got us well through it. They took a lot of pictures and while we tried to escape them it wasn’t even a good feeling but probably also because we weren’t prepared and never in such a situation. They followed us and when we said goodbye they just kept taking pictures. “It was so nice to meet you…we should stay in contact” Candice said hugging Maureen. “We will” Maureen said. You need to tell me tomorrow how it was” she said to me and I nodded as we hugged before separating. We immediately got into a taxi while Maureen was standing outside posing a last time for the photographers before I pulled her inside laughing. “Stop that” i said laughing. “I was feeling it” she said smirking and I laughed with her. We talked about the lunch with Candice and as I reapplied my lipstick I saw that two black cars were following us. “No fucking way” i said looking behind me. “Hm?” Maureen asked looking behind her too. “Are they…following us?” she asked. “I hope not” i said putting my lipstick and the pocket mirror back inside my black bag. “I’ll call Annabelle” she said as she called Annabelle to tell them about it. We paid the taxi driver as we reached the hotel before getting outside. The cars were gone but the photographers were right in front of us. They took a lot of pictures of us and wanted to talk to us but we immediately ran up to Annabelle and Olga that walked inside with us. Olga showed them her middle finger for fun.

In the evening we were going into a cinema which was fun and in no time there were already pictures and videos of us again. Since we were basically making our money with social media and ads we made a lot of content. And Olga and I were starting to think about our teenage wish. We wanted to do a podcast when we were thirteen and were seriously thinking about starting one. Maybe about girly things…everything that comes up to our mind. I was thinking about it while lying in bed next to Maureen. She was already sleeping tightly same as Olga and Annabelle. I couldn’t make out why my thought kept me up but I knew that it was not only about the podcast, it also was about Charles. I can’t say that I don’t care because I do. I thought that me and him were close especially after Paris. After all he came for me to Paris and we spent almost every day together and I couldn’t stop thinking about how he wrapped his arms around me, hugged me, took my hands. Even if it was just a feather-light touch it was special snd I missed it. I got out of bed and walked on the balcony leaning on the railing. One sentence that was repeating in my head was Sometimes thins need to go wrong first before they can go right. But at the same time I thought that He is just a man…if you lose one you get a new one, they’re not special you’re just attached. But maybe I wasn’t ready yet to give up. I couldn’t stop seeing him and Alexandra every time I closed my eyes. During the day I was disappointed but at night I was sad. I missed him, I really missed him and it was not like with other guys. As I looked down on the streets I thought about our first meeting, at the race track in Monaco. How our eyes locked and how that made me feel. I changed a lot in the time he came into my life. In the end I want him to be happy and if this was what it takes to get that I was ready to let go.

After the meeting with Dior I had a little shooting with some other models. The girls were really nice and I even met the blonde one from the race in Monaco again. We talked a lot and then she introduced her friend to me. Her name was Charlotte and I immediately recognised her. “Oh my god…you are Charlotte Sine right? You were Charles girlfriend for a long time” i said surprised. “Yeah but please call me Charlotte” she said smiling. “I’m Madeleine” i said smiling. Looks like you’re one of the new stars” she said smirking. “You can say so” i said chuckling “You must do a good job…you are really pretty by the way” she said smiling snd I chuckled. “Thank you, you too” i said and she smiled at me. When they put me into a new outfit I could see Charlotte scanning me as if she was searching for something inside me. They were doing my hair and she sat next to me on the table. “Hey…can I ask you something real quick?” she asked carefully but softly. “Of course” i said smiling at her. “I don’t want to come off as rude or something in that way but I just have to ask…” she said and I nodded. “Ask ahead” i said softly and with a smile. “Is that you?” she asked me as she showed me a picture that someone took and posted on tiktok, it was a picture if Charles walking through Paris with me only our backsides visible. I swallowed and looked at her. “Uhm” i started and she put a hand on my arm. “You can tell me” she said smiling and I nodded. “Yeah…it’s me but please don’t tell anyone” i said and she put her phone away. “I knew it” she said smiling and I didn’t know if it was good or bad. “Is that bad?” i asked a little embarrassed. “No…not at all…I just wanted to know” she said smiling. “Is it that obvious?” i asked her giving her a slight smile. “No…I just recognised you by your hair…but no one would see at first sight” she said amused. “Good…” i said still a little embarrassed. There is a lot going on about you two” she said amused. “Too much” i said almost in a whisper and she tilted her head. “Are you…a couple?” she asked confused. “No, no, we met at his race and then we had contact and met in Paris…well he came for me” i said while scrolling through my phone. “Wow…that’s super sweet” she said softly. “It was, true” i said quietly. “I was just thinking about his girlfriend” she started but I cut her off. “We’re not dating or something we didn’t even kiss…we just spent tome together” i said instantly and she smiled. “Hey…I don’t blame you for it…I never held you for that type of girl” she said with a sincere smile. “Really?” i asked smiling slightly. “Yeah…I think you’re quite the girly girl” she said snd I smiled. “I’m not a slut or something like that” i said snd she laughed. “I never thought that” she said and patted my shoulder. She was curious about me and Charles but I just swallowed hard. “You want to go for a coffee when you have break?” she asked softly and I nodded.

We got us some coffee and sat down somewhere quiet. “I promise I won’t tell a soul” she promised and I just nodded. “Well we were pretty close but we separated after Alexandra’s instagram story where they kissed like a love obsessed teenage couple and that was too much” i said honestly and she nodded. “I understand that” she said softly. “How was your relationship with Charles?” i asked her curious. “It was good…we were happy but it wasn’t always easy for us especially for me…he has two lives and you’re somewhere in between…One day we noticed that we were coming to an end because his career was really important to him and we separated and broke up” she said casually taking a sip of her coffee. “Oh…” i said listening to her. “Hey…just because it was like that back then it does not mean that it would be the same for you…it was a longer tine ago and I think he learnt and knows what is important to him” she said softly rubbing my shoulder. “I’m not gonna lie to you…he had a lot of girlfriends in his life but I have a good feeling with you…you’re not like the others and I think that you would be just the right to stay” she said smiling and I shook my head. “I mean it, I think that you’re gonna be the one taking him over” she said nudging my shoulder with hers.

After our conversation we finished our shooting and I took a taxi back to the hotel. Exhausted as I was I dropped into my bed. Why do I have to feel like this?” i screamed into the pillow. I took a long bath and washed my hair because of all styling today.

I couldn’t sleep again and was sitting on the balcony after stealing Olga’s cigarettes to smoke on the balcony. “I don’t think smoking on the balcony is allowed” Olga said amused leaning against the doorframe with crossed arms. “Since when are you such a wise-cracking?” i asked amused and she joined me taking a cigarette too. “That’s the second night…what’s going on?” she asked and I just sighed. “Okay then just us two and the cigarettes…I feel like fifteen again” she said smirking and I laughed.

We were walking to this art exhibition and Olga was already yawning next to me. “Come on…really now? Were didn’t even arrive” i said amused. “I really don’t give a fuck about this exhibition” she said and I rolled my eyes. “I will need a coffee before that too” Annabelle said and Maureen and I looked at each other searching for help. “Olga…I supported you by going with you to a lady gaga concert too back then so could you maybe support me here?” i asked her and she gave me a death stare. “Don’t put Lady Gaga in here” she said and I sighed. “Fine” she said giving up. “Just try to have fun or try to look like you’re having fun” Maureen said as we reached the building. We were already asking ourselves why there were so many people outside the building, most of them looked like fans. Maureen and I looked at each other suspicious as we noticed some photographers. “That’s weird” she said and I nodded. “Probably a celebrity walked in” Olga said annoyed and I shrugged my shoulders. “Yeah…I heard that some famous people are in Paris right now maybe they wanted to see the exhibition” Annabelle said casually. “Voluntarily?” Olga asked and Maureen groped the back of her neck which made me smirk. We walked there and as some people saw me and Maureen we were already taking pictures again. A girl wanted an autograph but I wasn’t prepared. “I don’t have a pen with me” i said and Olga handed me hers. “Thanks” i said to her as I signed her phone case or more the mirror on the phone case. Two autographs followed and some pictures were taken. We walked inside and actually spotted famous people but not many. Annabelle was standing next to me with a coffee taking a sip while me and Maureen looked around. There were a lot of paintings set up and we took a quick look at them.

I turned to my girls and they walked up to me. “There is something we need to tell you” Olga said and I nodded. “Tell me” i said. “Charles is here” Maureen said and my eyes widened. “You’re joking” i said and they shook their heads. “With Alexandra” Olga said and I rolled my eyes. “Such a cunt” i cursed and Annabelle rolled her eyes. The exhibition was starting and we sat down. We were sitting in the third row, Charles and Alexandra in the first. We had a perfect look at them. “That’s a nightmare” Annabelle said. “Ew” Olga said and I shook my head. “I think I’m gonna throw up” i said rolling my eyes. They were sitting next to each other, Alexandra had her head rested his shoulder which I did too. He just sat there. “He looks like he doesn’t want that” Annabelle said watching them. “Belle…you’re supposed to watch the exhibition not those two” i said and she rolled her eyes. “Forget it” she said snd Olga watched them too. I tried to focus on the exhibition which wasn’t hard. Another painting was introduced and they called Alexandra up which made her stand up and walk to the front. “What?” Olga asked confused. “Now it makes sense…Alexandra is studying art history here in Paris” i explained and Annabelle sighed surprised. “I am triggered” Olga said and we listened to her explaining her painting and telling us something about her. I was trying to focus while Olga and Annabelle gossiped about her finding all of this very funny. Maureen next to me tried to keep a serious expression while I could hear everything and was trying hard not to laugh. I covered my mouth with my hand before laughing into it quietly. “Stop it” Maureen said chuckling quietly nudging me with her elbow. “Sorry” i said as I looked down on the floor laughing into myself. Maureen couldn’t hold back and started to laugh too. Soon we were all laughing quietly. Olga imitated Alexandra and Annabelle laughed into her hand while I was laughing while looking down to the floor before seeing how Maureen was looking at something else trying to distract herself. Olga and I whispered things into each other’s ears. When she was finished we all focused again.

After the exhibition we were standing in a corner talking to some people. I laughed a looked around just to lock eyes with Charles. My heart stopped beating for a moment before I turned back to the conversation. They were going to look at the pictures. I told them I’d join later and just stood there in the corner watching my friends while sorting out some things. “Hey stranger” a familiar voice said next to me. I turned to the voice just to look at the familiar perfect face of Charles, his blue eyes, his brown hair which was curly but perfectly styled, and the slight beard he had and of course his male physique. “Hey” i said turning away instantly. “You can’t ignore me” he said and I nodded. “I can” i said casually. “I think we should talk” he said and I could feel his gaze on me which made me swallow hard. “There’s not much to say” i said annoyed. “Just a minute” he said and I looked at him. “I only need 20 seconds…you are here with your girlfriend acting up like a love obsessed teenage couple” i said turning away again. “True but I still want to explain it to you” he said and I laughed bitterly. “I don’t want an explanation” i said annoyed. “Give me a chance” he said and I laughed bitterly before walking away making my way to my friends and the people we met that where going with us. Maureen looked at me almost asking and I just shook my head and crossed my arms. Every time we looked at Charles he was with Alexandra. She was always close to him as if someone wanted to take him away from her. It made me roll my eyes and get annoyed. “Give me the cigs…” i said to Olga. “Here” she said handing them to me. I raised an eyebrow and smiled slightly walking out of the gallery. I wanted to save myself. I lit it up and took the first puff. I couldn’t stop thinking about him the last days and that didn’t change. I thought about what move I should do next but for the first time in my nineteen years I didn’t really have an answer neither I had a clue of what I should do. It must’ve been a sign that I received a text of Charles over Messages. “Even if you’re not talking to me…I won’t give up” I read the message out loud. I took it as a sign and dropped the cigarette after taking only one puff. *I walked to Maureen asking her for help. “Talk it out with him…” she ordered softly. “Things need to go right with you now…the wrong stage of things passed” she said snd I immediately knew what she meant. I texted Charles. “Meet me outside” sending it to him. He quickly got his phone out and read it before looking at me still standing next to Alexandra. From earlier I already knew that Alexandra knew about me and that she knew about me being here, maybe that’s why she acted the way she did. He looked at me and I walked outside grabbing my vest.

Charles pov

I read the message and looked over at her. Our eyes met and she walked off. I knew what I had to do and grabbed my jacket. Alexandra must’ve seen the message cause she immediately looked at me warning. “Really?” she asked me annoyed. “What?” i asked her putting my phone back into my pocket. She rolled her eyes at me. “I’m sorry, Alexandra but Madlen needs me” i said not really looking at her. “Oh wow…she snaps with her fingers and you are following her like a dog” she said pissed. “Sorry” i said walking away, I made my way outside to her as quick as possible. I saw her standing outside of the building in her vest, her eyes on the cars the passed by. “We need to talk” she said swallowing hard. “Good cause I want to explain everything to you” i said determined. “I’m all ears” she said not turning to me but I knew that she was listening. “I have a good explanation for this today…Alexandra’s artwork was published today with this exhibition and I needed to come with her…she forced me more to be honest because of the image…it’s always about the image” i explained to her keeping my eyes on her even tho she didn’t look at me one second. “And for the picture…it was about the image too but more about hers as you maybe noticed” i explained and she swallowed multiple times. “I don’t want to be with her anymore…she’s not good for me and I realised what I really want and that’s not a girl that only wants the fame and uses me for it” i said and she nodded. “Yeah…you are really stupid with your actions and realisations but that you had this insight is making you a little smarter” she said almost coldly. “True” i said a little hurt.

Madeleine pov

“I really expected more from you…did you even know how that made me feel?” i asked him still not looking at him. “I thought about it very often…” he said and I shook my head annoyed. “I was sad, angry and disappointed…I felt cheated…and yes maybe I sound dramatic but that’s your fault” i said swallowing hard. “I know that…and I am dearly sorry…I understand that you’re angry” he said and I shook my head. “I’m not angry, Charles…I am disappointed” i said not looking at him. For me it was harder to hear that a person was disappointed in me than hearing that someone was angry with me and I knew that it was the same for him. “I felt like the most stupid person on the world” i added. “I understand that” he said and I swallowed hard. “Just for the record…I meant everything I said…I’m still missing you but nothing happened the way I wanted it…and those days in Paris with you were the best I had in a long time and to be honest…I think that you are the best surprise destiny made me” he said and I could feel his eyes on me. I turned to him. “You are not like other girls” he added and I looked away again swallowing hard. “Charlotte said the same thing” i said quietly. “My ex-girlfriend, Charlotte?” he asked and I nodded. “I met her yesterday” i said in a whisper. “It’s the truth…and just so you know…knowing that you watch my races, that you learnt everything about Formula 1, that you make me smile with your smile and that you make me feel better even if my day is the worst it could be…makes me the proudest person alive I guess…” he confessed and I immediately looked at him. “Do you think that you didn’t make me the happiest girl in this world? The way you treated me…it was something I never had before and I can’t get over the fact that you listen to me…I could talk to you for hours and you still would listen…you never cut me off, you never told me I was too much, you just listened and then you also remembered things I told you…“ i said looking at him. He smiled at me and I shook my head. “Don’t come up with that smile now! I should’ve kept my hands off you because you have a girlfriend but I couldn’t and tho I don’t want to confess or accept it I felt jealous…not in the envy way but just jealous…Alexandra has you, she has you close everyday, she gets things I could only dream about” i said annoyed. “So you’re jealous” he said smirking and I rolled my eyes. “I am disappointed that you find that amusing…for you it may be just a game but for me it isn’t and I can’t stand having that jealousy” i said annoyed. “No, don’t see it like that” he said before adding “Every second with you is more precious than every year with Alexandra and to be honest…I just had a really big fight with her the last days and another one earlier” he said and I looked at him. “About me?” i asked and he nodded. “See…we wouldn’t have a chance whatever this is” i said crossing my arms. “Don’t be stupid after all you said that things need to go wrong first before they go right” he said coming closer. Of course he had to bring up that quote… “I didn’t only continue this thing with Alexandra because of the imagine…also because iI didn’t like seeing you with that one guy…you posted yourself on instagram lately” he said and I tilted my head. “Ah…so you’re jealous too” i said crossing my arms smirking at him. “I wouldn’t call it that” he said and I nodded smirking. “You are jealous” i said smirking. “Would you want that?” he asked confidently and I tilted my head. “It’s not really a proof but it shows that you mean what you said” i said softly. “Are we good?” he asked softly and I turned away before nodding. “Yeah…we’re good…i guess” i said and he grabbed me by my arm. “Come here” he said wrapping his arms around me to hug me. His chin was resting against my scalp.

“And Alexandra?” i asked after a while looking up at him. “Well she said that I’d follow you like a dog as soon as you snap with your fingers and it’s kinda true so…” he said smirking and I laughed. “Well and I’m here with my friends…” i said smiling. “I can go with you” he said smirking and I laughed. “Alexandra’s gonna be mad and there are some famous people in there so that wouldn’t help you” i said amused. He groaned. “Fine but I’ll stay close” he said smirking ruffling my hair and I slapped his hand away. “Sure, mister Leclerc” i said annoyed and we walked back inside. As soon as I was inside I got hugged with me standing there surprised. “Hey, Madeleine” Candice said excited while hugging me. “Candice?” i asked surprised. “Look who came to look after us” Maureen said smirking standing next to her. “Wow…what are you doing here?” i asked her smiling. “I’m not into art but I thought we could do something” she said and Olga nodded multiple times. “Yes please this here is sooo boring” she said and Candice agreed. “What are you saying, Maddy?” Maureen asked me. ”I think our work is done so I’m down” i said smiling. “Great” Candice said. “I’ll grab Annabelle real quick” i said and they nodded. “We’re gonna wait outside” Olga said and I walked to Annabelle. “Are you ready?” i asked her and she nodded. “Did you and Charles talk?” she asked and I just shook my head and smiled. “Why did I already know that” she said smirking before hugging me.

Next part

[cheesysoup-arlo]

More than friends?

You are Aarons younger sister, You’re a Junior (same grade as Janis and everyone, except Aaron) you have a crush on your long time best friend, Janis. You’re somewhat out but only to a few people (out to Ms. Norbary, Janis, Damian, and your brother) You don’t know about Cady and Janis’ scheme to take down Regina. Also you and Janis have kissed before but you two say you’re just friends, both worried the other doesn’t feel the same (you’re both a little dumb and very gay)

After the fight of Janis and Cady at Cady’s house, (Y/N) is at Janis’s house waiting outside for the girl to arrive, shortly after (Y/N)’s arrival Janis arrives with Damian “(Y/N) what are you doing here?” She says surprised but very happy to see you “well I was at your art show and wasn’t able to get these to you” you hand her a bundle of paper flowers you made “and my brother told me you and Cady had a fight so I decided being here now might be better than waiting till school tomorrow” you say with a small smile and a shrug “aw cute also bye I’ll see y’all tomorrow” Damian says as he leaves “bye” you and Janis say at the same time, waving goodbye to him “that’s really sweet of you I really appreciate, um do you want to come in?” janis says looking at you hoping you say yes “if it’s not a bother to you I’d love to spend some time with you” you say with a smile “yeah, please come in” Janis says letting you in and you both head to Janis’ room, It’s covered in art, like all of it “woah your room is really cool” you say looking around taking it all in “oh uh thank you” Janis says with a big smile, blushing a lot “wait, is Janis ‘Imi’ike blushing?” You say in a teasing tone “whaaa nooo it’s…paint?” Janis says trying and failing to think of a good lie “hmm not convincing” you say with a smirk, realizing you’re really close to each other. You two are quite for a bit, it’s a comfortable silence, Janis stares into your eyes “woah, your eyes are like the night sky, so mysterious” she says causing you to blush “are you trying to flirt with me and get me to kiss you? Because it’s definitely working” you say wrapping your arms around her “mmm maybe? do i have consent to kiss you?” Janis says with a small smirk and her eyebrow slightly raised “oh absolutely” you both lean in, It’s a gentle kiss and it last a while until you both in need of air “woah that was” *deep breath* “amazing, you’re a really good kisser” you say with your nose touching hers “thank you, you are really good too” janis says blushing more before pulling you in for another kiss. You both pull away “can we watch a movie and cuddle or if that makes you uncomfortable we can-“ Janis started to ramble until you cut her off with a quick gentle kiss “you cute when you ramble” you say pulling her over to the bed the on top of you causing Janis to blush a lot “you’re warm” she says looking up at you “is that a good thing?” You ask slightly confused Janis nods snuggling closer to you “so um… do you wanna tell me exactly what happened with you and Cady?” You ask slightly hesitant “well, she was supposed to come to my art show but she said she had a family trip. I checked insta after my show and saw a bunch of people posting at cady’s house. I was pissed so I went over to her house to check it out, I ended up yelling at her and she said ‘it’s not my fault that you’re obsessed with me’ and-“ Janis says getting upset, you gasp genuinely surprised because you thought Cady was a nice girl “no way? she said that?” You say also getting upset “yeah…” janis says not looking at you, you pull Janis really close to you and start playing with her hair something you’ve recently learned she likes “um can we actually stop talking about this…please” Janis says looking up at you “yeah of course…um you said something about wanting to watch a movie?” You say trying to remember your conversation from earlier “oh yeah, hmm can we watch…actually I don’t know what I want to watch” Janis says with slightly confused frown “we could do something else?” You say trying to hint at something “like what?” Janis says with a confused head tilt “like this” you say as you lean in and kiss Janis, she pulls away

“woah, don’t get me wrong I really like you, like more than a friend but don’t you think this is a little fast?” Janis asks concerned “oh um, maybe? I don’t know…if you want to take things slow that’s totally ok I hope I didn’t just ruin our night completely…I’m sorry…” you’re worried you went to far and looks down at your hands, you mind is scrambled and your thoughts are racing. Your thoughts are interrupted by Janis gently grabbing your chin to make you look at her then pulling you in for a quick gentle kiss “you don’t need to be sorry, I think it’s cute that you want to make out with me already but can we just talk about what we are first because I don’t want to assume how you feel about me, we’re friends first above everything, your friendship means more to me than anything…but don’t tell Damian that he’ll be mad that I like you more” she jokes slightly at the end hoping to make the topic change smoother “our friendship means the world to me but I really want to be more than that and I’ve know about this feeling since like freshman year, which is kind of crazy to think about especially with everything that happened before that…” you say recalling the chaos of middle school, the spin the bottle incident, the bunsen burner incident, Janis being kicked out of school for a semester, you staying friends with Janis and Regina through it all was confusing and hard but Regina couldn’t get rid of you because of your brother and there was no way you were letting go of Janis she was your everything. “Honestly I think I’ve liked you longer than that but I finally came to terms with it freshman year” you say blushing a little trying not to make eye contact “aww you’re being so cute” Janis says with a laugh poking at your arm “…I think I’ve always liked you but I never told you because at first I was scared to tell people I’m gay, then the whole thing with Regina, and honestly… I just never thought you’d like me like that…” Janis says a little embarrassed “well I definitely do like you like that” you say making eye contact with her “get over here cutie” you say opening up your arms to cuddle with Janis, she immediately wraps her arms around you “so…are we girlfriends now?” Janis asks hesitantly “um yeah…but I don’t know if I’m ready to tell people since well my parents still don’t know about me being…” you voice trails off at the end “oh…well we don’t have to tell people, we can be girlfriends and just tell Damian?” Janis suggests “I think I like that, yeah I like that idea” you say smiling a little “so my lovely girlfriend, wanna cuddle?” Janis asks “I thought we were cuddling?” You say looking at her confused “mmm we’re not close enough” she says as she tangles her legs with yours, pulling you closer to her and making the both of you lay on you sides so you’re facing each other “aww you’re such a softie” you say playing with her hair “only for you cutie, only for you” Janis says giving you a gentle kiss causing you to giggle a little while blushing. You are still playing with her hair and she is softly drawing patterns on your back under your shirt. Janis starts falling asleep and so do you.

A/N: this was just chilling in my drafts unfinished and in a weird format that I fixed so I hope y’all like this lol