#thinking of my careers a lot today I fear

[sgrspiced-a]

pandora and minnie both struggle heavily post-games with their image. pandora more so, but they both go through a period of disillusion over the fact that who they were in the arena doesn’t matter anymore. the knowledge that you’re a cold blooded killer and now must play barbie doll for their entertainment — it’s very disorienting for them.

[isabelguerra]

i dont have an actual name for it but depressed college au is probably one of my favorites. i dont really care for the adults in paranatural and thinking about how the activity club/others might grow up and continue their lives is so much more interesting to me

[neil-gaiman]

I hope this finds you well. Today is the 10th anniversary of my sister's death. She died unexpectedly when she was 20, and I was 13. My sister was so full of energy and compassion for others. She befriended probably well over a hundred people, and knew each of them by name. She taught me something that I think is demonstrated really well in Coraline (and reading it reminded me of her)--that courage is not fearlessness, but it's being afraid and standing up to that fear regardless. Off and on since she died (though more on than off in the past 5ish years), I've struggled with depression and a feeling of pointlessness in my life. The realization that someone that vibrant can suddenly vanish off the Earth has never left me. And I don't shine nearly as bright as she did. It feels like no matter what I do, I'll never leave a significant impact. I've had a lot of difficulty with college, and I'm on my second leave of absence since starting my undergraduate studies. I don't really have any career goals and have had trouble finding a career path that would be interesting and fulfilling enough to me to feel like I could stick with it long enough to make a living. But I've been doing everything I can to keep going and keep trying to get to a more stable place emotionally. To finally find my footing. Every night before I turn in I like to look at your posts on here. I find the words and advice you give to others very comforting. So, I'd first like to thank you for sharing your kindness and humor with everyone. And I'd also like to ask if you'd have any kind words or advice for me. Thanks for your time.

The main thing you should probably remember is that from the inside your sister didn't realise how bright and sparkling and energetic and compassionate she was either. We know ourselves from the inside, see only too well our pain and clumsiness, our depressions and our failures.

She was a light for you. You'd be surprised to find that you are a light for others. You shine. (Whoever you are reading this, I promise you this: you shine, and you will leave your own impact on the world.)

[parfaitblogs]

risk ❀ s. reid x reader

in which you have the sweetest regular, and it’s probably too soon to tell him you love him!

pairing: spencer reid x barista!reader genre: fluff tags: s1 spencer. who rambles. biblically accurate career!reader sorry if some of the coffee talk makes no sense to you. reader makes all the first moves. y'all kiss (aww). written in timeskip sorta it's not crazy (like maybe a month). not proofread sorryyy (im not). word count: 2.2k a/n: first instalment of my spencer reid eras tour🙂‍↕️ season 1 spencer reid i freaking adore you. he's so cute. gif!! i thought gifs in this series could be cute lol. envisioned 1x10 spencer bc of his nightmares if that means anything. enjoyyy ily im off to work 🏃 

series masterlist

There are many reasons you come to work each morning. The money (an obvious one), your coworkers who usually make each day a little bit more bearable. And Spencer. A regular who had become a little notorious for having an odd coffee order, that most of the store workers hated making. 

Except for you. 

It wasn't especially odd. But in a store that thrived on making the perfect cup of coffee, sometimes it meant remaking it three or four times because the shots didn't pour at the right amount of time, and recalibrating the machine was a hassle you all didn't want to deal with in the middle of the morning rush he usually came during. 

You had taken note of him the first few times he came in — always keeping to himself, flashing the most awkward smile you think you've ever seen on a human being, and ordering his old order (a large latte with as much sugar as you could fit in the cup). It was by the seventh time that had you thinking of him a little more often than just while you were at work. 

He looked a lot more exhausted than usual. His usually tame hair now loose and hanging over his face as he took a weary step towards the counter, fingers brushing strands away and tucking them behind his ears. 

"The latte, right?" you had asked him, and he had frozen, and you stood in fear of this not being the Spencer you thought he was, and you had just asked a total stranger about a coffee they've never ordered. 

But then he let out a nervous laugh, shaking his head. "Uh, no. Not today. Um—do you guys have a limit on how much coffee I can have?"

Your eyebrows furrowed. "No... we don't. I wouldn't recommend any more than like five shots in our largest size, though. It'd probably taste gross. But we can add as much as you need."

"Five's good. Yeah," he nodded his head, fingers wrapped tightly around the leather strap of his messenger bag. 

"Just... a five shot latte?" you clarified, and he froze again, shaking his head once more. 

"Do you recommend anything else? I—uh, I want it to be sweet enough still."

"I can do you a mocha?" you offered. "White chocolate mocha if you're looking for it to be even sweeter."

"I'll try that," he nodded his head, and out came his awkward smile, which had you smiling back just as awkwardly. 

Which was how he got to his current usual. It honestly became a test to ensure your coffee machines were actually running well, considering pulling five well-done espresso shots at once was no easy feat. And, again, most of your coworkers hated making his drink. 

Which was why it was palmed off to you. Every single morning without fail. And maybe in another universe you would join them in the hatred for this man's frustrating drink order. But then, in that universe, you wouldn't get to talk to him every morning (and slowly break him out of whatever shell he had locked himself up in). 

"I never asked," you began, staring at him over the top of the coffee machine while putting white chocolate fudge into the bottom of the cup. "Why did you change your order randomly?"

He parted his lips and his eyebrows creased together for a few seconds, as if he was deciding whether or not to tell you. You were kind of grateful he concluded on trusting you. 

"I wasn't really sleeping. When I asked about changing my order," he explained, hands letting go of the bag strap so he could talk with them. "Then I guess I just liked the taste of it? And it kept me awake. Which is a bonus."

"I can imagine it would," you nodded your head in agreement, flashing him a small smile, which he returned, bashfully. "Why weren't you sleeping?"

He went silent, and you almost cursed yourself for asking. Maybe you had gone too far. It was why, when you had begun to busy yourself with making his drink a little faster, you jumped when he spoke up again.

"I was getting these nightmares," he said, and your head lifted from the milk you were steaming. "Because of what I do for work."

"Law, right?" you asked, and he let out a small laugh, tucking hair behind his ear. 

"Sort of. I'm with the FBI."

"Oh, that's right," you replied, nodding your head in recognition. He had said that to you at some point in the earlier days when he first started coming in, because you had asked where he works so close by to be coming in as often as he did. "Can you tell me what part? Or is that confidential?"

"No, no, I can. I'm with the Behavioural Analysis Unit," when your face twisted into confusion, he added, "We use psychology to analyse serial killers and catch them. Well, not just serial killers, actually. But that's what we focus on."

"And it works?" you asked, eyebrows rising as you placed a lid atop his coffee, sliding it out on the pick-up section where he was standing by. His face fell slightly, and so you were quick to add, "Not—I didn't mean it like that. I just mean I'm shocked. That psychology is all you really need to catch a serial killer."

"It's not all we need. There's a lot of other elements that go into finding one. But our primary focus is how their brain works and we use behavioural science to figure that out. Actually, we used to be called the Behavioural Science Unit when it was first created."

He was too busy talking animatedly with his hands for him to have picked up his coffee, and you were too busy watching him with a smile to remind him it was ready. 

When he did reach for it, you could feel the familiar pang of disappointment that had started shooting through you every time he was picking up his coffee and leaving. A weird sensation that left you clawing at the walls of your brain to come up with something to say to keep him there. 

It was probably why you blurted out, "Are you seeing anyone?" Which was followed by stunned silence from him, and regretful silence from yourself. What a question. 

Slowly, he began to shake his head, his lips twitching into a confused frown. "No. I'm—I'm not." 

It shocked you a little. He wasn't jaw dropping, per se. But he was attractive. You had said it a few times to your coworkers whenever they asked why you talked to him so much — there was a running joke that you were already secretly dating him behind their backs. Not funny.

"I was just wondering if you wanted to..." you hesitated. "Go out for dinner? Maybe? I'm so sorry if I'm totally overstepping. In fact, I encourage you to say no, because this is a little weird. I'm so sorry," you rambled when you were met with only silence from him, wondering if you had weirded him out of the ability to talk. 

"With me?" he pushed out, his voice a little higher pitched than usual, and you nodded your head, because maybe he wasn't weirded out. Maybe you had just flustered him. You hoped so, at least.

"Yeah," you said. "Is that weird? Or is it okay? To ask that?"

"It's okay. Yeah. Yes. I would love—like to. I mean, that would be nice. Yeah," he stammered, and you smiled. 

"Here," you held your hand out and gestured for his coffee, taking it back and picking up a Sharpie to write your number atop the lid, before you slid it back to him. "I get off work at one. Call me?"

"I will," he nodded, eyes fixated on the number for a few seconds more, before he returned his eyes to you. "I will. Um—bye!" he took a step back, and you let out a loud laugh when he stumbled into a chair behind him. 

He was sheepish as he waved to you, bidding you another goodbye, the sound of the bell above the door ringing once, and then again when it fell shut. 

And you had, somehow, secured a date with Spencer.

Which turned into two dates. Then three. And then, with some weird stroke of luck and twist of fate, you were spending every evening you could at his apartment, and him at yours. 

But you were yet to kiss. 

Not by any particular reason. Really, nothing either of you did ever really called for a kiss. Which was as frustrating as it was understandable. Frustrating, because you felt like you were simply friends, who sometimes went out for dinner, and had feelings for each other. But he had told you very early on he'd never been with anyone before, let alone ever been on a date. Hence; understandable. 

But frustration was more overwhelming than you had thought, because you were on his couch, blanket draped over both of your bodies, as he read you a book — The Chameleon. A short story by Anton Chekhov (an author whom you were only barely familiar with). And yet, all you could think about was kissing him. 

In your defence, he was very kissable, as you stared at his lips while he spoke, your heart stuttering quite uncomfortably in your chest. You weren't sure what it was precisely about him that made him like that. Maybe it was the natural pout of his lips, or how they twitched in humour at the little jokes Chekhov had written into the book that only made sense in Russian, despite him attempting to translate it for you. 

Whatever it was, it was overriding your senses, and in true Spencer fashion, he hadn't noticed you weren't intently listening to his reading until he glanced down to catch a reaction to something he said. You caught as he closed the book and placed it off to the side, jostling you from your haze. 

"You don't like the book, do you?" he asked, and you were quick to shake your head. 

"No, I do," which was true. The parts you were actively listening to you enjoyed. "Sorry, I'm distracted."

"By what?" he shifted on the couch to face you.

You fell silent at that, the answer hanging on the tip of your tongue, unsure whether or not saying it could ruin things. You didn't think it would. "You."

"I'm distracting?" he asked, eyebrows creasing together and a confused frown pulling his lips down. 

Which confused you. "Yes?"

"I don't think I'm meant to be sorry for that," he said. "But I am."

"You shouldn't be," you breathed out with a small laugh. 

"Right," he nodded his head, laughing too, awkwardly. "How am I distracting?"

You studied his face for a few moments, which ended up being a pathetic excuse for a lip study, because you were fixated on them again, and you decided Spencer probably didn't even realise that that was what you were doing. 

"We haven't kissed yet," you told him, instead. 

"No. We haven't," he agreed. 

"Do you just not want to kiss me?" you asked.

He did that thing he does when he's thinking — furrowed eyebrows and parted lips, eyes blinking a few times, before he comes up with his response. 

"I just don't want you to be disappointed. I've never kissed anyone before."

"I concluded that," you answered. "I won't be disappointed."

"You might be," he mumbled, and his gaze averted from your own, which had another smile stretching across your lips. 

"Only one way to find out, right?"

He hesitated before nodding his head, lifting his eyes back up to look at you. It was then that you learned that, like everything else, you might have to make the first move on him. Again.

The thought made you laugh, and though he wanted to, he didn't get a chance to question why you were laughing, because your hands were on his face and you were pulling him into you, lips meeting his in a gentle kiss that elicited a surprised squeak from him. 

"You've gotta kiss me back," you murmured against his lips, and his response was a quiet 'oh'. 

But he was a fast learner, because soon after he was. Objectively, it wasn't the best kiss you've ever had in your life. But it got better by the second, and he was doing enough to make your heart stutter in your chest, his hands reaching up to cup your own face, palms and fingers covering the mass of your cheeks. 

His hands there provided him the ability to keep you there, and you had to pry them off your face so you were able to pull back for air, breaths coming out in short pants. Only for a short second, because he was chasing your lips again, and you laughed, before letting him kiss you again. And again. And again. 

Until both of you were out of air, and he was glassy-eyed and pink-lipped. Though, you were probably his mirror image of that.

And he smiled at you, crookedly. And you wondered if it was too soon to say you loved him. 

your reblogs and replies are always appreciated dearly ♡

[maxwellatoms]

Hello Mr. Atoms, I'm an animation student in college and fan of your work. I got this assignment in which I need to ask questions to a professional in the area. Could you pretty please answer them? It'd mean a lot to me.

1- Are you happy with your career? How it's going.

2- What are your opinions, expectations and hopes about the independent animation industry that's developing?

3- What do you think about the advent of artificial intelligence? Do you fear for the future of animators?

4- If money wasn't a problem, would you still do what you do?

5- Any animators you admire and would like to mention?

Okey dokey.

1- Are you happy with your career? How it's going.

Not really, in that there seems to be no career left.

The animation industry swelled its numbers greatly before 2020. Almost immediately after that, corporate greed synergized with a pandemic to reduce animated programs and the number of people working on them to almost zero. It takes almost a year from beginning to end to make a single episode of an animated show (by the modern standard). There was nothing being made in 2020 and four years later, we''re not in a much better spot. It's going to be a long drought for (especially) Kid's TV Animation.

Recently, many of my former co-workers have hit the financial wall and can't continue, moving away after (sometimes) 20 years in the industry. I begin to wonder if I'm very far behind.

A "bounce back" a year from now would need to start today. There are still some animated shows being made now, but those are almost universally "library" properties. That means it's an existing I.P. (Intellectual Properties like Garfield/Mario/Batman/Star Wars) so as an artist you're immediately in that box. Depending on the property and the studio, it can be an unpleasantly tight box. I grew used to holding and maintaining the vision for a show, but it's less fun when it's not my vision. It's even less fun when you can't inspire someone to follow your vision because they've been so ruthlessly abused.

I'm pretty sick of how big media corporations treat their employees. If I inherit one more burnt out crew due to mismanagement, I'm gonna lose it.

Over a decade ago I fought hard to get board artists story credit for the episodes they were actually writing, and felt like I'd won a big victory for everyone. The second my back was turned, it all reverted.

Mostly... what is the point now? My career is/was developing ideas, crafting those ideas into a workable show, then managing teams of thirty to seventy people to produce a couple of dozen episodes per year. Studios actively do not want new ideas right now, and are actively searching for ways to eliminate what artists from the process. I'm not sure what my job would be under this new system, but it feels like they decided to hang onto the anxiety-inducing deadlines while removing anything remotely pleasurable from the experience.

2- What are your opinions, expectations and hopes about the independent animation industry that's developing?

It's the only way to get anything done, currently.

The current state of the industry is not sustainable. I (along with a lot of other animators I know) are trying to decide what's next, and pretty much everyone agrees that "you just have to make something".

It is (in that very specific way) a great time to be a young animator. The system was never going to treat you well anyway. If you can get something like a Hazbin Hotel happening without studio help, you can currently write your own ticket. I'm super proud of Vivsie, because that's a LOT of stuff to handle. I never had to handle my own marketing or drum up money to make Billy & Mandy happen.

There are opportunities there, but it's definitely "Hard Mode". The best idea is probably to team up with a few other people you like and like to work with.

Hopes? I hope that the young animators take over and make something new on top of the bones of the old industry, rather than just allowing that industry to patch its rotting hide with their collected works.

3- What do you think about the advent of artificial intelligence? Do you fear for the future of animators?

I suspect true AI might just peace-out like ScarJo in "Her", but we're not there yet. What we have now isn't Artificial Intelligence at all (though I do believe it may be the underpinnings of the Artificial Suconscious of what may one day become an actual Artificial Intelligence.)

The LLMs and "Generative AI" are (so far) a big dumb waste. They consume tons of energy and aren't great for doing anything creative. If you've sat down with Chat GPT for a creative writing session, you've probably run into the "out of the box" limitations which prevent it from talking about sex or violence-- which happen to be a major component of most stories.

Still, the technology has come incredibly far in an incredibly short amount of time. I imagine we're going to hit the point where we're being hazed by artificially generated political ads way before Generative AI can produce a consistent and usable character turnaround, so that'll be the test. Whatever the legal fallout is from this stuff over the next few years will set the tone.

Still, studios have a vested interest in pleasing their shareholders. Generative AI potentially has the capability of not only replacing swaths of money-eating artists, but handing that control directly to the billionaire studio heads. Mark my words: We're headed straight for billionaire-generated content.

I don't think the public at large will want to watch Elon Musk's fever dreams, so there's that. So law and general distaste might stave it off for a while, but I think there's just too much impetus for studios to continue to try to please their investors. "AI Art" is here to stay.

Eventually that will lead to millions and millions of bots generating millions and millions of songs and paintings and movies all day every day. Most of it will be utter trash. Right now (so I'm told) viewers are already burnt out, and will generally only click on what they already know. On Netflix, where there are twenty things you've never heard of and one you have, you're more likely to pick the thing that gives you comfort and gives you a guarantee you're not wasting your time. With exponentially more A.I. trash, how would you even begin to filter it out?

You'd need absolute control of an already existing distribution system. We currently have a few of those, and all of the media companies are desperately trying to merge with them to insure their own survival.

To me, the post-Gen-AI landscape looks a lot like old-school Cable, but with endless I.P. and fewer masters.

4- If money wasn't a problem, would you still do what you do?

The real question is, maybe, "What am I even doing?" These days I try to do a lot of gardening. I'm trying to learn new art skills, because suddenly twenty five years of experience managing, drawing, and writing isn't worth much. I recently worked on Jellystone until Zaslav lost 2.5 billion in the wash and had to find justification for his new yacht. The show before that? Also culled midway through to save money. The days of multi-year gigs seem to be over, and if I'm going to scrape by doing freelance, maybe I can do that somewhere else.

I'll always make art. I can't seem to help it. Ideas aren't my problem-- it's executing those ideas without the help of a structured pre-existing system. I honestly don't know if I'll ever be able to pull that off. My strengths are great, but were always supported by friends I worked with.

Can I start an indie cartoon with all of these cool friends? Sure, maybe. Most of those people have gone on to have other careers of their own and got used to being paid. Now nobody is getting paid and no one can pay anyone else. My immediate circle are all now middle-aged people with families and no jobs. Convincing them to give up a large chunk of their day for an idea that's not guaranteed to pay off is going to take some real effort.

I technically have fifteen years until I can claim my "retirement", assuming that still exists by then. That's a pretty big hole to fill with... I don't know what.

The difficult "What comes next" discussions at home are really just starting.

5- Any animators you admire and would like to mention?

There are a lot of cool animation people out there. I already mentioned I was proud of Vivsie. I was also reminded recently just how great C.H. Greenblatt and Mr. Warburton are. I know they're my friends. They're both just really upstanding, creative people who take good care of their crews.

The treatment of animation industry professionals by the studio system has been one of the most demoralizing and heartbreaking parts of this demoralizing and heartbreaking time.

---

So there ya go. If you want to look for someone whose attitude is a little more upbeat, I won't blame you a bit.

Wherever you are, I wish you the best of luck. For me, just climb up there and crush it. I would very much like to add you to #5 someday.

[theuntoldstorythatneedsawriter]

Less 📱☕️

Alexia Russo x reader

warning : fluffy 💭💗

summary :

You meet your online girlfriend "Less", only to discover she's secretly Alessia Russo, the famous footballer.

You sat in the café, sipping your drink, glancing nervously at the clock. Today was the day you were finally meeting her, the girl you had been talking to for months. She went by the name "Less" online, and you had hit it off from the start. It felt like you could talk to her about anything, and she had this charm that was impossible to resist.

But there was one thing that always nagged at you: Less never sent many personal photos. Sure, you had seen a few selfies here and there, but they were always casual, nothing overly revealing of her life. She claimed to be a private person, which you respected. After all, she made you feel safe enough to open up, and that was all that mattered, right?

You stared out the window, lost in thought when you heard the café door open. You turned instinctively, and your heart nearly stopped. Walking in was someone you never expected to see in a place like this.

Alessia Russo

You recognized her immediately. She was one of the brightest stars in women’s football, and you had seen her play countless times. But what was she doing here?

Before you could process the situation, she looked right at you, her eyes lighting up. She smiled, a smile you knew all too well. Your heart skipped a beat, confusion flooding your mind as Alessia Russo, the Alessia Russo, made her way toward your table.

“Y/N?” she asked softly, her voice familiar yet completely shocking.

You blinked, struggling to connect the dots. “Less?”

She grinned sheepishly, her hands stuffed into her jacket pockets. “Surprise.”

You sat there, speechless, your brain trying to catch up with what was happening. Less, the girl you had been talking to for months, your online girlfriend, the one who you thought was just a regular person, was Alessia Russo, one of the biggest football stars in the world.

“I... I don’t understand,” you stammered, your thoughts a jumbled mess. “You’re... you’re Alessia Russo?”

She shifted on her feet, a hint of nervousness in her expression. “Yeah, I know. I should’ve told you sooner, but I didn’t want you to see me as... well, as ‘Alessia Russo the footballer,’ you know? I wanted you to get to know me.”

You stared at her, still processing the fact that the Alessia Russo was standing in front of you, the girl you’d grown close to, the one you’d shared so many personal moments with. And now, she was telling you she had been hiding this huge part of her life.

“I wanted to meet you like this, in person, so I could explain,” Alessia continued, sitting down across from you. “I’ve never done this before. I didn’t want my job or my career to change the way we talked.”

You could see the sincerity in her eyes, and it was hard to stay mad if you were even mad at all. Mostly, you were just shocked.

“So, all this time, you were hiding this?” you asked quietly, trying to make sense of it.

She nodded, biting her lip. “Yeah. It wasn’t because I didn’t trust you, I just didn’t want it to affect the way you saw me. I love football, but I wanted you to get to know Alessia, not ‘Russo.’”

You sat there, staring down at your coffee, feeling a mixture of emotions. It was hard to be angry, because in a way, you understood. Being Alessia Russo meant she had the world’s eyes on her. She didn’t get to live like a normal person most of the time, and she probably feared that once people knew who she was, everything changed.

“I get it, I think,” you said after a long pause. “It’s just... a lot to process. I didn’t think I’d be meeting a famous footballer today.”

Alessia chuckled softly, looking relieved that you weren’t storming off. “I’m still the same person you’ve been talking to for months, though. I still care about you the same way, and nothing’s changed in that department.”

You met her eyes, despite the shock, this was still the girl you had fallen for. The person who had made you laugh on long nights, who had listened when you needed to vent, who had shared parts of herself with you. That hadn’t changed.

“So... you’re not just some random girl who likes football,” you said, a small smirk tugging at your lips.

She laughed, her shoulders relaxing. “Yeah, I guess not. I was going to tell you. I just wasn’t sure how.”

You leaned back in your chair, still processing everything but feeling a lot less overwhelmed. “It’s a bit crazy, but I guess I can’t be mad. You’re still my Less.”

Alessia’s smile grew wider, the tension finally easing between you two. “Exactly. And I’m really glad you came today. I’ve been wanting to see you in person for so long.”

Despite the whirlwind of emotions, you couldn’t help but smile back. “I’ve been wanting to see you too. Even if you did leave out one tiny detail.”

She laughed, looking at you with that soft, affectionate gaze you had come to know through your video calls. “I’ll make it up to you, I promise.”

You shook your head, feeling the tension drain from your shoulders. “You better. But... I think I can forgive you, Alessia or should I still call you Less?”

“Call me Less” she said, reaching across the table to take your hand.

You squeezed her hand, feeling the warmth of her touch, and smiled softly.

[lilacstro]

Moon in 8th house

Just like how moon shines the brightest in the darkest sky

Well, at the suggestions of @cyberstrangerballoon under my astro observation 6, I will be making this post :))

Moon in 8th house, is a very self contradictory position in my opinion. Most of the astrologers say, its an uncomfortable position for the moon, but I believe its just much more than that and people with placement have some kind of gift, if they realize it today or when they are 80.

People with this placement are often attracted to occult sciences and I can understand why, even if they are unaware, there is a desire to understand everything, especially the hidden and misunderstood because you yourself are quite these things. Its a self projection of some sorts, discovery of self.

I read a chart for someone a few weeks ago, and that guy was seemingly "logical" person and was coder-designer of sorts. When asking for career recommendations, I found something that indicated interest and attraction to occult and dark, I mentioned that to him, though he seemingly showed no signs of interests in such things and he was wooed, he said nobody really knows about this and was super surprised.

And the major reason, why I see people with this placement have some kind of psyche, not necessarily the occult but even esoteric sciences, and metaphysics is because moon here grants you the ability to "feel" through. yes, feel. and now it can often translate into having no logic for your emotions. feeling things INTENSELYY even the slightest things, and often seemingly being disconnected from your emotions because though you can feel a nudge, you just feel it, and have no understanding or logic at times or I must say, most of the times.

This actually grants you the power to see through other people, literally, see through. I would suggest a thing though I would recommend using your conscience ofc, but whatever is your first intutive nudge about something/1st strong feeling about something, believe it please. If not consider it strong and firm, because the first flare of feelings is right, more than you can think. A feeling that it wont end well with someone, A feeling that you should/shouldn't go here, avoiding someone, follow it even if it makes no sense. Please.

People with this placement are polyglots in understanding people. They can literally speak your language, the one you understand, and can have several flairs to them. This can often cause a lack of identity as in who i really am?

There is a desire to understand someone deeply but a desire to be understood as well, and most of the times, just by feels and not having to explain, because you do it for others, and want that once to yourself, but you have to understand everyone does not have this in them.

Pay attention to your dreams that feel different, and encrypted. You might dream a lot as well, so I would just say pay attention to the ones where you feel something after waking up.

There is a desire to be understood, but hide. Hiding in yourself, your conscience. A fear of betrayal, to be able to trust. People with this placement often come from hardships I have seen, closing them off to people most of the times. But, my suggestion is, let people you desire come in, let them hurt you if they choose to, they get what they have done for, but you will transform, and rise, like a phoenix always. ALWAYS, you will find yourself bouncing back, it would be a storm and madness but it would be the brightest sun afterwards.

Learn about this psyche of yours through people. Learn or you will still hurt/get hurt through the one person you trust after a lot of time. It is good to see who wants to understand you, and who is just enjoying being understood. People with this placement, YOU HAVE TO LEARN TO BALANCE THE INTENSITY AND YOUR EMOTIONS and that will only happen if you practice, through meeting people and letting your guards down when you feel nothing is wrong, Dont confuse overthinking and refusal to your intution.

Heard somewhere "anxiety screams, intuition whispers". Hopefully this will help you discrete between your feelings.

Journal. Journal everything down, because at the end of the day, the person who would get your nerves would only be you, someone can just get closest.

Also, I would suggest stop acting on being high on emotions. It isn't helpful in long run. Control this tendency, though your placement nudges you and it would feel hard and binding, but do it, its a suggestion.

Even if you don't reveal your past to people or reveal yourself to people, judge the ones who you can if you wanted to, its important.

This placement in fact can get mental health issues and issues of isolation if unchecked, though these kinds of people, again as a contradiction, are self aware of this. The problem lies in controlling, it feels binding but you need to control your thoughts and impulses.

remember that even if you feel alone inside frequently, it isnt like so. Your light shines bright and people feel it, even if they can't explain it. Just like how moon shines the brightest in the darkest sky. Don't feel otherwise <333 i love you

Thats it for this post :) I hope it resonated. paid readings are open <33 love you all

[kimvante2013]

『𝐋𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐬』 변우석

summary: The feelings between you and your best friend are far from over.

Genre: best friends to lovers,little bit of angst,Byeon Woo Seok x fem!reader,drabble

author notes: After months I came back, today I bring you a drabble about the love of my life, also because I saw "Lovely runner" and I liked it a lot so I got a little inspiration from there, well I hope you enjoy this and later I will bring more about Sun Jae and Woo seok since I don't see many people writing about them, take care and good night :)

Word count: 1089k

The soft ping of my phone broke the quiet hum of my apartment. A message from Woo-seok.

“Hey y/n, do you want to come to my house later? I need to write some lines for my new drama, “Lovely Runner”. You know, the usual, being my personal script coach and all that stuff.”

I smiled, imagining Woo-seok's signature goofy smile. It was almost endearing how he never seemed to take his acting career seriously, even though he was on the verge of becoming a major star. He was still the same goofy, clumsy boy he'd known in high school, the one who always made me laugh.

“Sure, I'll be there in an hour. "What time are you free?" I replied and let the tea sit while he prepared it for me.

An hour later, I found myself outside Woo-seok's elegant apartment building, the imposing structure a stark contrast to the cozy, modest apartment we used to share as roommates in college.

He greeted me with a wide, welcoming smile and a playful push, the aroma of freshly brewed coffee filling the hallway. "You're late," he teased, pushing me inside.

"Traffic," I lied, my cheeks heating up under his gaze. Despite knowing him for years, my heart still pounded when he looked at me like that. He always had this way of making me feel seen, like I was the only person in the room.

His apartment was a testament to his success, modern and elegant, with a wide view of the city skyline. But I still felt at home, filled with the familiar warmth of his presence.

"Let's go to my room," he said, leading me to a well-lit space filled with scripts, props, and a comfortable chair.

"Okay, so this scene is where I first meet my love interest, played by the beautiful, talented, and incredibly charming Ryu Sun-jae," Woo-seok began, his voice dropping to a playful whisper.

I couldn't help but laugh. He was very dramatic, even when he talked about his own work. But his enthusiasm was infectious and I found myself immersed in the story. He ran through the lines, his voice shifting seamlessly between playful banter and sincere emotion.

He was good, really good. He poured his heart and soul into every word, into every gesture, making me forget that he was just watching a friend rehearse.

And this is where I'm supposed to make a grand entrance, you know, like a knight in shining armor. "But I think he's too exaggerated," he muttered, pulling a crumpled script from the table.

"No, I think he's perfect," I said, surprised by my own conviction. "He is your character, it is what makes him unique."

Woo-seok looked at me with a flash of surprise in his eyes. 'Actually? So you think?

"Yes," I nodded, trying to ignore the way his gaze lingered on me. There was an unspoken connection between us, a bond forged over years of shared laughter, dreams, and late-night chats.

'What do you think he should do here?' He asked, pointing to a particularly difficult line.

'Hmm, maybe try it with a little more vulnerability?' I suggested, my voice softening as I realized how closely I was studying his face.

He nodded, frowning in concentration. He walked the line again, this time with a raw emotion that resonated deeply within me.

"Wow," I sighed, genuinely impressed. 'That's perfect. You captured the uncertainty, the fear, the longing for acceptance. It is brilliant.'

Woo-seok's smile was brighter than the city lights outside. 'You're the best, Y/n. You always know how to make me feel better about my work.

We continued rehearsing until the sun began to set, casting long shadows across the room. As we worked, it felt like we were falling back into the comfortable rhythm of our old college days, time blurring into a cozy, shared memory.

"I think I'm a little hungry," Woo-seok said, breaking the silence. 'How about we order some food?'

"Sounds good to me," I agreed, feeling a warmth spread through me.

While we waited for our food, we sat on the floor and flipped through old photo albums. Laughter filled the room as we recalled silly moments from our past, each image a window into our shared history.

The delivery boy arrived, bringing with him the aroma of spicy noodles and sizzling dumplings. We ate in comfortable silence, enjoying the food and the company.

Later, while we were cleaning, Woo-seok turned to me and his eyes met mine. 'You know, Y/n, I'm so lucky to have you in my life. You have always been there for me, through thick and thin.

I smiled, my heart swelled with warmth. 'Me too, Woo-seok. You are my best friend and I will always be there for you.

He reached out and took my hand, his touch sending a shiver down my spine. "I know," he said, his voice low and sincere. "And I'm grateful for that."

For a moment, we stood there, hands clasped and the silence filled with unexpressed emotions. The city outside glowed like a distant dream, but all he could see was Woo-seok, his eyes containing a depth that he knew he couldn't ignore forever.

“I should probably head home,” I finally said, my voice barely above a whisper.

He nodded and his gaze stopped on my face. "Yeah, I guess you should."

I pulled away, my heart aching with a mix of longing and apprehension.

"I'll see you around, Woo-seok," I said, forcing a smile.

"Yes, definitely," he replied, his voice laced with a hint of disappointment.

When I left his apartment, I couldn't shake the feeling that something had changed between us. The line between friendship and something more had blurred, and I wasn't sure I was ready to cross it.

I had always valued our friendship and the thought of risking it for something uncertain made me sick to my stomach. But the warmth of his touch, the intensity of his gaze, and the way he made me feel so seen had awakened a longing inside me that I couldn't ignore.

The lights of the city blur as I walked, my mind replaying the events of the night. I knew I needed time to process everything, to discover my feelings. But one thing was certain: the bond between Woo-seok and I was deeper than simple friendship, and I knew, with a certainty that made my heart ache, that our story was far from over.

[genericpuff]

(You can delete this ask if it makes you uncomfortable) Do you think I should give up on my dream of being a webcomic artist? It's been what I'd been wanting to for years yet from what I'm hearing, it's hard to get money and an audience and that the mainstream webcomic hosting platforms don't treat their creators well. It doesn't help that while my art is decent, I don't really know how to create webcomics beyond like really short 4-5 panel comics even though I'd been drawing for many years. There's also the issue of my ADHD making it difficult to commit to stuff but then again at least that can be hopefully fixed once I get medicated. So, now the career of a webcomic artist sounds like a pipe dream at best. Is it worth pursuing, even if I don't make much money with it?

"Do you think I should give up on my dream of being a webcomic artist?"

And this isn't just for you, anon, this is for everyone who follows my nonsense here.

Yes, it's hard to build an audience.

It's even harder to make money.

You should still make webcomics if you really want to do it.

The only practical piece of advice I can give you from the perspective of someone who's been doing this for years is to manage your expectations. Because that's the biggest mistake a lot of webcomic artists make (and I too, made this mistake) they go into it setting the bar that it HAS to result in them making a living off it, getting famous off it, etc. when that's unfortunately only the reality for the 1% who get lucky or have an advantage that the other 99% don't have. And then, of course, failing to meet those ridiculously high expectations makes the fall hurt that much harder if you fail, especially with odds like that stacked against you. That's not to say you shouldn't set a bar for yourself, but you have to set it in a place that's reasonable. Especially if you're an artist with ADHD (same, mood), we have a REAL bad habit of setting the bar unreasonably high for ourselves when we're still learning and getting our feet wet (it's why we're always taking on new hobbies after getting inspired by musicians or crafters and then getting immediately discouraged when we're not suddenly able to do the thing with that same amount of skill).

Set the bar in a reasonable place with reasonable expectations, and then when you MEET that bar, you'll have even more motivation and confidence to aim higher. What won't give you confidence is setting the bar alongside the pros who have been at this for years, because not only will it take way too long to hit that for you to see results, you might give up before you even come close because of how far away the bar is.

A career as a webcomic artist is about as guaranteed as making a career out of Youtube. But being a webcomic artist, period? You can do it. Anyone can do it. I'm still doing it in spite of everything. Like, I cannot even fully express to you just how much of what I do here is the culmination of a long list of failures. My art, my writing, the stuff I do here is built on the corpses of my failures. But those failures were still important, they had to happen to make me into the person and artist I am today. That person is STILL making mistakes, and that artist is STILL not rich LOL Failure is scary, but fear of failure is the true killer of joy and growth.

Do not tie the merit of being a webcomic artist to how much money you can (or can't) make out of it. Just like with starting a Youtube channel, you shouldn't go into it expecting money and fame right out the gate, but there are equal amounts of joy and experience you can gain by doing it. There's a reason people say you have to do it out of love and passion first because ultimately that's all you'll have to keep carrying you through if and when you fail to meet your goals. You don't have to be sure if you'll still want to do it a year from now or five years from now, none of that matters. If you want to do it now, then do it.

Make your 4-5 panel comics if that's what you enjoy doing. Make whatever tickles your fancy. Acknowledge your fears and doubts, thank them for their opinion, and do it anyways. "What if it ends up being a waste of time?" The time will pass anyways. Worst case, at least you'll be able to say you did it. That's better than never trying and regretting it in the end.

[dreamingofep]

Forbidden Love pt. 2 💔❣️

Fandom: Elvis - Elvis (2022)

Prompt: Reuniting with Elvis was supposed to be the highlight of your summer, but with unresolved tensions between you two, things aren't what they seem. [Fem!Reader]

TW: Cussing, TENSION, kissing, grinding, fingering

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 5.3k

A/N: Hello everyone! I had originally wrote all of this part out a few months ago because this is where the idea sprang from! There’s so much more to uncover and this part definitely needs to be in Elvis’ perspective later on so be on the lookout for that. 🤭

Here are the songs I included in this part too! Listen if you haven’t heard “I’ll Never Let You Go (Little Darlin’)” It’s so sweet and I just pictured Elvis singing this soft and low on the piano. 🥹

If you'd like to read any of my other fics, start here or Ao3!

Hope you enjoy and message and comment what you think.

September 21, 1958

Your heart was heavy as you walked up the driveway. The house was illuminated by the lawn lights and the hum of people inside grew the closer you got to it. Graceland was always so beautiful, especially at night. The large Corinthian columns were so stunning and made the whole house stand out. It was made for Elvis you thought. No ordinary man could live here. It had to be someone as grand and special as Elvis Presley was. 

You walk up the steps to the front door and take a deep breath. Emotions were flowing through you today. You were going to say goodbye to one of your favorite people. Elvis was always there for you, in good times and bad, he would always listen. He was supposed to be gone for two years in the army. It couldn’t have been a worse time to be drafted. He was at the top of all the charts and his career was just taking off. You two had gotten close the last two years or so. You think it was a way to ground Elvis and keep him connected with the real world. You both loved to hang out with each other's family and have barbecues together. 

Now all of that was going to change. He was leaving and you knew you’d be a wreck without him. You don’t have a lot of friends as it is. But Elvis was special. There was no replacing him. You promised yourself you wouldn’t cry at this party. Elvis wanted everyone to have a good time and not think of it as his goodbye party. You took a deep breath before you decided to go in the house. You smoothed out your pale pink dress and opened the front door. 

The entire house was lively and some of the people that were standing by the stairs greeted you. Your eyes frantically search for Elvis. You wanted to spend as much time with him as possible before he left. Walking to the kitchen, you set down the bottle of champagne you brought. One of Elvis's housekeepers hugs you and tells you she’ll open the bottle for you. Someone hands you a flute already filled with champagne and you graciously take it. 

The bubbly drink danced on your tongue and went down smoothly. You squeeze your way through the sea of people and continue to search for Elvis. There had to be over fifty people crammed into the first floor of the house. You accidentally bump into a taller man and apologize for that. You decide to ask him if he knew where Elvis was. He has this awe-struck look in his eyes as he looks at you. You silently roll your eyes at him, you didn’t want to talk to him, all you wanted to do was spend time with Elvis. 

“I uhh… I don’t know. But you can hang out with me. I’m John, you’re y/n right?” He asks. You don’t have the patience to be making small talk with anyone tonight but you fear this guy won’t get the message. 

“Yeah, I am,” you say as you keep looking for Elvis and taking another sip of champagne. 

“Yeah, I’ve seen you around here. How long have you known Elvis?” He asks. You sigh unamused, you weren’t in the mood to have another one of Elvis’ friends hitting you. Maybe you would have actually given it a shot if it was another night but it was not the right time at all. Your mind was so focused on getting to Elvis. 

“Quite a while. He’s my best friend,” you say flatly. 

“Well, that’s something you and I have in common. He and I go way back. Can I get you another glass of champagne?” He asks pointing to your glass. 

To get through this conversation with you, I’m going to need ten, you think annoyed. 

“Yeah sure,” you say flatly, creeping your way in slowly to the living room. You stretch on your tippy toes to see if you can spot Elvis. He was almost always the tallest one in a crowd and you hoped you’d get a glimpse of his dark black hair. It was useless because all you see are other people’s heads and couldn’t see anything else. You huffed annoyed, time was ticking by and you hadn’t even greeted Elvis yet. 

You get tapped on your shoulder and you look up to find John with another champagne glass in his hand. 

“Thanks, see you around,” you say as you quickly push your way into the crowd and make your escape from the annoying man. 

The sound of the piano fills the living room and you just know that Elvis is the one playing in it. He did that so often at parties. He played so beautifully and loved to entertain even though it was his party. You finally squeeze yourself to the very front and see him. He looked so happy with all his friends around the piano waiting for him to burst out in song. He wore a white short-sleeved button-up that was ruffled on the chest and tucked into white pants. He cut his hair the shortest you’d ever seen it for boot camp but he still looks so handsome. 

His attention gets torn from his friends and he catches a glimpse of you. His face lights up when he sees you and instantly gets up from the piano bench. 

“There’s my favorite girl! Where have you been?” He asks excitedly, scooping you up in his arms and squeezing you tight. You can’t help but smile and giggle softly as you feel how happy he was to have you here. 

“I’ve been looking all over for you! You’re impossible to find in your own house,” you giggle.

He gently sets you down and looks at your outfit, taking your hand in his. “And you look like a million bucks too!” He says twirling you around. “Thank you for coming. I’m so glad you’re here!” He says gleefully.

“Of course, I wouldn’t miss it!” You say with a smile.

“Perfect timing too. I was just about to play some songs, and you get to sing with me,” he says cheekily, pulling you onto the piano bench with him. You get extremely nervous, you do not like to be in a crowd of people and have the main focus on you.

“Oh no no no Elvis please I cannot sing,” you say nervously, trying to scoot away from him.

He wraps his arm around your waist and keeps you right next to him.

“Oh no, you’re not running away from me. You just got here! Come on, please sing with me. I love it when you do,” he pleads. He looks at you with soft eyes and a cute cheeky smile. God, you couldn’t say no to this man even if you tried.

You sigh defeated, “Okay fine. Only for a few songs, and then I’m hiding in the corner again,” you say jokingly, taking another sip of champagne. He lets out a big boisterous laugh, bringing his hands to the piano’s keys, and plays a few chords to warm up. He plays so effortlessly, stretching his long fingers across the ivories. 

Well it’s one for the money

Two for the show

Three to get ready now go cat go

But don’t you step on my Blue Suede Shoes…

He radiates so much energy when he sings. There’s no way anyone could have a straight face while he performs. A huge smile forms on your face and you start clapping along to the beat. He bumps your shoulder to join in and you sing along with him softly. His mood is contagious and you can’t say no to him and join in. 

The longer he plays, the less nervous you become. You don’t pay attention to any of the surrounding people in the living room. Song after song, it felt like it was just you and Elvis singing to each other. Or he was just singing to you. You honestly lost track of time as he continued to play more songs and you kept drinking your champagne. And come to think of it, you lost track of how many drinks you had too. But you didn’t care, you were having too much fun singing with Elvis. He was handed a few drinks and he was drinking them too. It surprised you because he normally never drank but the mood in here was so joyful and fun, you were sure he didn’t care tonight.

Before you knew it, the living room was slowly clearing out and the house was getting increasingly quieter. People were saying their goodbyes to Elvis and telling him how much they’d miss him. Some of the guys were going to go out driving and invited you both to join them, but Elvis wanted to stay here. You didn’t want to leave either, every second you had with him was precious. 

It was past 1 am and Elvis started playing slower ballads while humming the tune. You could sit next to him for hours listening to him play. You were entranced by the way he played, how his fingers almost danced over the keys and the most melodious sounds rang out. You put down the last glass of champagne down and felt your head spin a bit. You tried not to focus on it too much and tried to draw your attention back to Elvis.

I’ll never let you go little darlin’

I’m so sorry, ‘cause I made you cry

I’ll never let you go because I love you

So please don’t ever say goodbye…

He plays the song so beautifully, letting the chords ring out fully before he sings the next line. You wish you could snap a picture of this moment and never let it fade away in your memory. Sitting here, listening to him sing a ballad as it pulls at your heartstrings. You were going to miss him so much. He wasn’t going to be down the street from you anymore. You couldn’t just stop by to see how he was. He was going to be thousands of miles away, in a different country, on a different continent. You promised yourself you weren’t going to cry, but you feel the tears well in your eyes as he finishes the song. Damn, the alcohol getting the best of you and your emotions.

Because I love you, pretty baby

I’m so sorry ‘cause I made you cry

I made you cry

Yeah, I’ll never let you go

“Cause I love you, little baby

So please don’t ever say good-bye

He finishes the song so beautifully and you both sit there in silence. A few tears were rolling down your cheeks and you don’t bother to wipe them away. He looks over at you and sees your tear-filled eyes.

“Aww y/n, what’s wrong? Why you cryin’?” He asks as he gently turns your head towards him. His thumbs gently wipe the rolling tears off of your face but that only makes it worse. You take a deep breath before speaking and try to hold it together.

“I’m just… I’m just going to miss you,” you say weakly. He instantly pulls you into his arms, your head resting in the crook of his neck. He rubs your back, trying to soothe you through your cries.

“I know, I am too. It’s going to be so different,” he admits.

“I don’t want you to go. You’re my best friend. Who am I going to talk to now?” You sob, holding onto his shirt.

“You’ll still have me. Write to me any time you want or put on one of my records when you’re lonely. Think of it as though I’m singin’ to you and only you. I love singin’ for you,” He coos. Your tears continue to pour down your face. That thought was too much. You couldn’t fathom the idea that the only way you were going to be able to hear his voice was on a record. You didn’t realize how spoiled you were that you could hear him sing right next to you any time you wanted.

You lift your head up off of him and nod your head. You look into his own tear-filled eyes and somehow his eyes look more blue and mesmerizing. Your head felt light after all the champagne but you didn’t care. Nothing could tear your focus away from Elvis right now. He wipes your tears away once more as his own fall down his cheeks.

“And what do I do if I find myself missin’ you?” He asks through sniffles.

You search for the right thing to say, not exactly sure what to say in a moment like this. You had nothing to offer Elvis. He was the man who had everything even though you both were so young. You look down at your hands, unsure what to do, and see your heart-shaped ring on your ring finger. It was something you found at a little boutique downtown. The band was gold with a black heart that had a sun and a small little diamond in the center. You thought it was cute and a nice find. You slide it off and lift it up for Elvis to see. 

“Then you take this with you. I’ll always be with you if you have this,” you say softly. He carefully takes it out of your hand and looks at it closely. He looks up at you in disbelief.

“Are you sure? I don’t want to take something so valuable to you,” you waivers. 

“No please, I insist. It’s the least I could give,” you sniffle.

He pulls you in for another hug, squeezing you tighter than he ever has before. You so desperately wanted to freeze time so you could live in this moment forever. You didn’t want to let go of him. You were terrified he would come back from the Army and become a totally different person. But you had to stop thinking that, just enjoy these last few moments with him.

“I’m gonna miss you so much,” he murmurs.

“Me too,” you say weakly.

“Don’t forget about me,” he whispers into your ear.

“Oh God I could never,” you tell him.

He breaks away from you, looking deeply into your eyes and placing his hand on your cheek. His thumb glides back and forth along your cheek and sighs to himself. You aren’t normally so close to him like this and can see so clearly how gorgeous he is. You swore his eyes sparkled when they looked at you. His nose was perfect and his skin was flawless. You watch as his eyes drift down to your lips and you do the same. Maybe you never consciously thought about it, but his lips were beautiful like the rest of him. They were full and plump with a soft pink color to them. They looked soft and pillowy almost. 

You can feel your breathing hitch in your throat the longer you stare at him. His hands tighten around your body but are still very gentle as though he’s afraid he’s going to break you. He leans in ever so slowly, biting his lower lips as he does so.

“Good, me too…I can’t forget you even if I tried,” he murmurs sensually.

The tension he is giving off makes your head spin more and you can’t wait any longer. You lean into him and crash your lips into his.

He felt like heaven. Each kiss was tender and soft and yet there was so much urgency behind it. You were right, his lips were softer than you could have ever imagined, and felt like you were kissing pillows. You can’t catch your breath as you both kiss each other with more passion. His hands roamed up and down your back, clutching onto the material of your dress. Oh, those hands, they felt so good on you. They were addictive and you wished you could feel them on your skin instead. You had no idea you needed his attention like this.

You boldly slip your hand into his shirt, feeling the soft chest hairs that resided there. He responds with a soft pleased groan into your mouth. Your heart races in your chest, not believing that this is happening right now. You felt on fire with the way he was kissing you. He was so needy and desperate for your attention as his hands kept moving along your body. He slips his tongue into your mouth and you both groan when he does so. You had never thought. You needed him like this, you were always so adamant about staying friends. Maybe things could be different…

There was a throbbing developing in between your legs and was only growing worse by the second. It was so different than other times you’ve felt this way. You had felt this way in private moments by yourself but with Elvis, it was amplified to a whole other degree. Your chest heaves and you feel yourself become more needy. You slowly stand up and try to get Elvis to do the same thing. He breaks the kiss and looks at you a little perplexed. You push him backward to the couch that is right behind the piano. He quickly sits and stares up at you wide-eyed. He smooths out his pants and spreads his legs apart slightly. Your eyes drift to his long legs and how good he looks like this. He just exuded sensuality and temptation without even trying.

You notice how his length was hard and pushing up against his pants. Oh God, you’ve never felt more needy in your life. You wanted to feel what he was like underneath you. You quickly straddle his hips and scrunch up your dress before sitting down on him. Your core rests on top of his length and the heat from him makes it hard to breathe. You let out a small groan as you feel him underneath you. The straps of your dress slide off your shoulders and you’re left looking at Elvis’ luring eyes.

You both don’t say anything, just the sounds of your labored breaths fill the room. His hands drift from your back to the front of your body, gently cupping your breasts in his hands. You whimper softly, loving the way his hands feel on you. You look down as he does this, watching how his hands consume your soft breasts and have you reeling for more. He sighs as he continues to touch you, looking up at you with an awed gaze. You needed his lips once more and leaned in to kiss him again. The kisses somehow got even better with his hands on you like this. Your arms wrap around his neck and feel his soft hair with your fingertips.

Something instinctual takes over your body and your hips begin to move on him, grinding your core onto his hardened length. A bolt of electricity runs through you as you begin to move. You had no idea something like this could feel so satisfying. You break the kiss and gasp out, needing breath more than ever. Elvis lets out a deep groan and lets his head fall back with his eyes closed. Another wave of pleasure runs through you seeing him like this. He looked so attractive with satisfaction running through both you and him. His eyes pop back open with his mouth falling open slightly.

“Oh God honey… that feels so good,” he moans.

Honey.

Oh God he had never called you that before. Hearing that come from his lips made you feel like the actual word; a sweet sticky mess.

You nod your head at him and whimper in agreement as your breathing hitches. You keep eye contact with him as your core continues to throb with every movement of your hips.

“Elvis,” you whine.

He nods his head at you, his hands slithering to your back and grabbing handfuls of your ass. He helps you grind into him harder, his hands helping your hips move back and forth onto him. You gasp loudly, loving how this feels.

“I know honey, I know,” he groans, “You feel so good on my cock,” he whimpers into your ear. 

You helplessly moan at just his words. You hold onto him tighter and move more as he helps you. The friction of your panties against his slacks made a coil in your belly form and it tightens with every move. You couldn’t get enough of him. You didn’t want to stop having him make you feel this way. He stills you and you look at him with needy eyes.

He takes one of his hands and moves it to the front of your body. He scrunches the material of your dress in his hand and looks up a you with pleading eyes.

“Can I touch you?” He asks softly. You nod your head quickly and help him lift up your dress. His fingertips graze your mound and move down to your folds. Wetness had pooled in your panties and you squirmed underneath him. Elvis moves his fingers slowly, taking his time exploring you.

“Jesus honey you’re soaked,” he groans. Your hips move with his curious fingers and moan in agreement. You feel his finger pull your panties to the side and continue to slide them through your wet folds. You cuss softly, loving how he’s making you feel. He pulls you in for a kiss again and you both moan when you feel each other’s lips. He puts more pressure on your clit, rubbing it in soft circles. Your body jolts forward with each touch and you are more breathless than you thought possible. You stare at him in awe as your pleasure builds and builds. He has a pleased smirk on his face as he watches you grind on his hand. You couldn’t imagine you could feel this good but it’s somehow possible with Elvis.

Your hands quickly work the buttons of his shirt and spread it open. You then work your way down to his pants and fidget with the button and slide down the zipper. Elvis stills you, not letting you go any further.

“Honey, wait,” Elvis sighs.

“Please, I want you,” you whimper.

“I know, so do I,” he grumbles into your neck.

“Please… please make me feel good. I want you,” you plead, grinding your hips onto him again. He lets out a loud groan, unable to denounce how good you feel. You move back a bit and your hand finds his length. You rub it softly, feeling how much heat is coming off of him and how it is throbbing from your touch. Your head spun when you felt him, you needed him more than anything. 

“Please honey, please. Make love to me,” you beg, looking up at him with needy eyes, your hands scratching down his arms. He looks at you in awe. He reacts to you like he’s never heard such beautiful words in his life. He looks like he’s feeling just as weak as you and his hand slowly comes out from underneath your dress.

His demeanor suddenly becomes sorrowful and melancholy. He lowers his gaze and shakes his head somberly.

“I can’t honey. We can’t right now,” he says low.

You can’t help but feel like you’ve been punched in the gut. Being rejected by him hurt. You could have sworn he wanted you just the same.

He can see how you’re a bit hurt and taken aback by his words.

“It’s not that I don’t want to honey. Trust me, I would love to as you can see,” he says as he glances down at his hard length. “It’s just not the right time. I don’t want you regretting this kind of thing. I don’t want it to be because I’m leavin’ tomorrow,” he explains.

“It’s not because of that I just-,” you try to insist but end up stopping yourself, “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have asked for sucha thing,” you say embarrassed. You quickly get off of him and stand wobbly. Your head spins more than you were prepared for and almost stumble sideways. Elvis thankfully grabs you and holds you upright.

“I gotcha, it’s okay. I don’t mean to make you feel bad honey. You need to know I loved every second of that,” he says sweetly, taking your face in his hands and placing a soft, tender kiss on your lips. You sigh at the feeling once more, not wanting to forget how this feels. You gently pull away and take a deep breath.

“I guess I should be going,” you tell him.

“Oh no, you should not be driving like this. Just stay the night,” he insists.

You didn’t have any fight left in you and you just nodded your head. He keeps his arm around your waist and leads you up the stairs with him. It was a challenge walking up those stairs while the whole world was spinning. He opens his bedroom door and helps you in. 

His bedroom was warm and inviting. It smelled like him and made you want to put that scent into a candle. He turns on the lamp by his bed and you get a better view of the room. Most of his furnishings were black and there were piles of books on his dresser and on his nightstand. 

He’s such a little bookworm.

You glance at the clock on the wall and it is past two. You feel his arms go around your waist again and he steps in front of you.

“Did you want to go to the bathroom or anything? Or would you rather lie down?” He asks you.

“I’ll just lay down,” you say sleepily. He nods his head and turns to pull back the sheets for you. You reach your hand at the back of your dress as he does this and struggle to find the zipper. You let out frustrated little sighs and he turns back to face you, concerned with what you’re doing.

“Help me unzip this dress please,” you say defeated as you turn around and lift up your hair. Elvis doesn’t say anything, all you can feel is his fingers gently pull on the zipper and drag it down to the small of your back. He turns you around and he has that needy look in his eye. You reach up on your tippy toes to give him a small peck on the lips. You can feel the smile forming on his face as you do this. You step around him and go to the bed. Before stepping in, you let your dress fall at your feet and quickly get underneath the sheets. They were soft and silky and the heavy comforter made it feel extra cozy.

“I’ll sleep on the floor, honey. You let me know if you need anything,” Elvis tells you. You slowly roll over and give him a pouty face.

“No please, stay with me. You can sleep with me,” you insist. He looks like he’s going to denounce this request but you don’t let him. You hold the sheets across your chest and pull at his hand.

“Please, Elvis. I want you to sleep in your own bed before you leave,” you plead.

He lets out a frustrated sigh and nods his head.

“Okay, let me change real quick,” he says. You smile sweetly at him and close your eyes as you wait for him. The room still felt wobbly but lying down did feel better. You hear Elvis sift through his closet and walk back into the room fully changed. The shift of weight in the bed made your eyes pop back open to watch him get into bed. He was shirtless with only his underwear on. He was still hard and could clearly see the outline of his cock in these. You tried to subside the needy feeling you had for him and just focus on sleep. 

He lays down and gets underneath the sheet with you but leaves plenty of space between the two of you. You grumble annoyed, wanting him to get comfortable in his own bed.

You scoot closer to him, laying your head on his chest.

“You can get closer to me, I don’t bite,” you giggle. 

He chuckles softly to himself, “oh good I was worried about that,” he teases.

You feel his arms wrap around you as you start to close your eyes again. You had never felt so safe and comforted in someone’s arms before. 

“I’m gonna miss you,” he whispers.

“Mhmm, me too,” you slur sleepily.

“Don’t forget about me,” he says softly.

“Never,” you hum as you let the dark blanket of sleep take over.

*

The crack of sunlight shone in through the curtains making your eyes flutter open. You stretch your limbs and feel the soft silky sheets wrapped around you. Your eyes instantly pop open when you realize these do not feel like your sheets at home. 

“Shit,” you say as you sit up quickly in the bed. 

You look around and realize you’re in Elvis’ bedroom. You clutch the sheets around your chest and look down to realize you’re practically naked underneath them. Your heart hammers away, trying to scramble to remember what happened last night. 

Did we? No, we couldn’t have… you think to yourself. You feel you still have your panties on and see your dress crinkled on the floor next to the bed. You try to recollect last night’s events as best you can. You remember singing with Elvis on the piano, smiling and laughing at him. Then you remember those eyes. Those beautiful, seductive blue eyes peering into yours with an intense blazing heat… how good he felt underneath you as he moaned your name. The need that grew inside of you to have him take care of you in a way you didn’t know existed. 

But he stopped you… telling you that it wasn’t the right time. Your heart drops. That’s right, he stopped you from going any further. You sat there wishing he took care of you. Fulfilled the need he created inside of you. It still lingered in you as you sat there.

“Elvis?” You say out loud, seeing if he was still in the bedroom.

You frantically search for the clock and see it’s ten past ten. Your heart sinks again. Did he already leave? No, he couldn’t have, he would have said goodbye to you. You quickly put your dress back on and rush down the stairs.

Peeking into the dining room, the table was empty with not a trace anyone has been there. You go into the kitchen to see if you can find anyone there who might know where Elvis went to. You see one of his housekeepers at the sink rinsing off dishes. She hears you enter the kitchen and has a surprised look on her face.

“Oh hey darlin’! I didn’t know you were here!” She says excitedly.

“Yeah I stayed the night,” you say a bit timidly. “Where’s Elvis?” You ask.

She looks at you somberly, turning off the faucet and wiping her hands dry with a dish towel.

“Aww honey I’m sorry, you missed him. He left at dawn for New York. I’m sure he didn’t want to wake you. But you probably said your goodbyes last night right?” She tries to say positively.

You look down at the floor, trying to hide your flushing cheeks. Yeah, that was one hell of a way to say goodbye…

“Yes we did. I better get going. I’ll see you soon,” you tell her.

You make your way to the front door and stop dead in your tracks as you see an envelope on the side table with your name on it. You quickly grab it and make your way out the door. Your heart beats uncontrollably in your chest as you walk to your car. You quickly open the door and lock it as you stare at your name written in Elvis’ handwriting.

You hesitated to open it for some reason. A part of you thought he was going to confess how he regrets last night’s events. It scared you to see if that was the truth but had to see for yourself. You carefully tore the envelope open and pull the letter out. Your hands shook as you unfolded the paper.

My Girl,

I didn’t want to wake you this morning. You looked too peaceful. I had a wonderful night with you.

I’ll carry your ring with me wherever I go. It’s the greatest gift you could’ve ever given me.

I will be

With love,

Ep.

Tears roll down your cheeks as you stare at the words he wrote to you. You couldn’t help but feel like this was more than a goodbye letter. It was an end of an era for you two and he just put the nail in the coffin.

•

•

•

Tagging: @loving-elvis @neptuneismysister @velvetelvis @ccab @presleyenterprise@theresalwaysep

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[callofdutyma]

Haitani Brothers x Fem Reader

warning— pretty vulgar

You were Ran's girlfriend until your parents forced you to break up with him almost three months ago. Now, you're almost done with high school, and then the real hell begins. Your parents have always controlled your life, including who you date. You'll have to go to the university your parents picked, and follow the career path they picked. But that's not the life you want, is it? You want adventure and danger. You want to feel the adrenaline of living life on the edge again. You miss the thrill of being with Ran, the way he made you feel, and all the dangerous and fun times you spent together with him and his brother. It made you feel alive. 

Even though you were Ran's girlfriend, Rindou loved you too. You met both of them at the same time, and they quickly became the closest people in your life because they understood you. They knew how your parents would always make your decisions, and they knew you hated the boring life they'd force you to live, always sticking to the rules and following their orders. Ran and Rindou would always take you out to have fun and cause trouble, and you always had such a great time with them. They loved seeing you have fun, and watching your expression change after your parents were pissing you off. They were your best friends, then Ran confessed his feelings to you one day, and Rindou missed his chance. He wishes he would've told you how he felt sooner, but he respected that his brother got to you first. You knew that Rindou was in love with you, and so did Ran. But the brothers respected each other and wouldn't interfere if one of them ended up with the girl they loved. They have a strong brotherly bond, and they love and respect each other too much to let their feelings for you get in the way. Even though they both had feelings for you, they would be happy for the other if one of them ended up with the girl they loved, and they would always support each other no matter what. 

It's been almost three months since you broke up with Ran. Today, you're on a date with your new boyfriend who you‘ve been seeing for a month now. 

Ran leans against his motorcycle in the coffee shop parking lot, sipping his coffee when he notices you. His eyes widen as he sees the girl he never stopped being madly in love with, the girl whose virginity he took, walking hand in hand with some new guy. This, this made him boil with rage, and it's all because you decided to go on a date with another person. He still loved you, and he thought that the two of you were meant to be together. 

Ran couldn’t take it. He couldn’t hold it. So, he chugs his coffee and chucks the empty cup in the trash can before he storms towards you, his fists clenching and his eyes wide. 

Your eyes widen with surprise and confusion as Ran suddenly appears in front of you, blocking your path. You're taken aback by his sudden appearance and don't know what to say. You look at him, and your facial expression is a mix of surprise, confusion, and a little bit of fear. “Ran? What are you doing?”

Ran’s fists are still clenched. He looks at you in disbelief, he’s fuming. “What am I doing?” He lets out a frustrated chuckle. “You're the one who's currently on a date with someone else. You think I’ll take that lightly?” 

Your eyes narrow as you listen to Ran's words. “Ran, we broke up.” 

Ran let out another chuckle that was tinged with frustration, like he was trying to keep his cool as he would glance at the guy you were still holding hands with, which made the guy remain quiet. He could tell Ran isn’t the kind of guy he’d wanna mess with, so he lets you two talk without saying anything. “Y/n,” Ran looks back at you, “we were meant to be together. The two of us were going to be happy together, we were meant to be end game.”

You sigh, feeling mentally exhausted. “Ran, I told you I needed to focus on my life. Your delinquency and all that was just too much for me to deal with every day. I was sick of it. This guy is a classmate of mine and he shares the same interests as me.” You lie, you have no feelings at all for this guy, he’s boring, and too much of a goody-goody. The only thing you have in common with this guy is the university and career path you’re taking, which wasn’t even your choice. 

“Too much for you?!” Ran clenches his fists tighter. “You're nothing but a liar, y/n. You were never meant to be with this classmate of yours, this guy is nothing but a nobody to you. He's not me. I am the only one who understands you.” 

Your eyes dart to the ground, unable to meet Ran's gaze because then he’ll realize he’s right, and you know he's right. But you had to do it, you had to break up with him, because of your parents. “Ran, it’s over. I broke up with you months ago.”

“Y/n.” Ran says, looking down at your face that refuses to meet his gaze. “It will never be over. Your boyfriend? He'll never be like me. Never. He will only drag you down as a person, he will only make your life worse. He's not who you need, he's not who YOU deserve.” Ran grits his teeth. “You deserve me, you know this.”

You sigh deeply as your eyes look up to finally meet his gaze. “Ran please, don’t do this.” You say before you turn your head toward your boyfriend, “I need to talk to Ran alone, can I call you later?”

Your boyfriend nods and smiles genuinely, before letting go of your hand and walking home. You turn your head to look at Ran once again, “please, stop.” You continue.

“I will do everything to get you back, y/n.” Ran says as he steps closer to you, his two-toned braids moving slightly. “You don't belong with that guy, you belong to me.” 

You take a deep breath and then exhale. “Not anymore Ran. I told you, I gotta do what’s best for me. You’re a bad influence on my straight and narrow life.” 

“If I remember correctly, your life back then when with me wasn't so bad. I made your life memorable. I made your life interesting.” Ran smirks. “Now look at you. What life do you have now?” 

You don’t respond to that, you just turn your gaze back onto the ground. You hate your life now, you hate it so damn much. It’s boring and it’s suffocating. Like a prison.

“Your life is boring now.” Ran answers for you. “All you do is wake up, go to school, then sleep. No one understands you, no one makes you excited. No one is as cool as me.” He says, still staring at your face. “You don't have that adrenaline rush that I gave you.” 

You know he's right, so you stay silent, still avoiding his gaze. Ran takes note of the fact you can't answer him, and then he smirks again as if he knew that he's saying all the right words to hit you with a reality check. “You miss the adrenaline, don't you?”

“Stop it Ran! Just stop!” You say it with a hint of desperation in your voice, your eyes pleading for Ran to stop as they meet his gaze once again.

“I bet that when you're with your boyfriend, the feeling isn't there.” He continues to smirk. “You felt something when you were with me.”

You clench your jaw. Everything he says is true, it’s pointless to even deny a word he says, because he knows you better than anyone. “Ran, I just can’t. My parents don’t want me to stray from my path. There’s nothing I can do about it.” 

Ran narrows his eyes. “I knew it, I knew you broke up with me because of your parents. I fuckin’ knew it.” He says, his voice tinged with frustration. “Your parents don't understand you. So they forced that decision onto you.” He then smirks once again. “Do you think that guy understands you?”

You don’t respond to that, and Ran takes another step closer. “No, he doesn't.” Ran answers for you. “You're only with him to prove to your parents that you've changed. But you haven't.”

“Ran please, don’t do this.” You plead, your breaths becoming heavy at how close he is to you. “I have to follow the path that’s been laid out for me. It’s my only choice.”

“No, that's not your only choice y/n. You can be with me. You can be with the man you love. The bad boy that's got a soft spot for you.” He grins. “Come back to me y/n.”

“I can’t Ran.” You say, your voice quiet. 

“Y/n, you miss me, don't you?” He mutters, he’s so close that you can feel his body heat, and the familiar scent of his cologne mixed with his natural man-musk fills your nostrils. 

“Please, don’t do this.” You plead, your breaths becoming heavier as your body temperature rises, but you try to push your feelings down. 

“Y/n, you miss the adrenaline.” Ran says, his voice quiet as he takes another step closer, his body not even an inch away from touching yours as he looks down at you with those downturned eyes and penetrating gaze. “You miss the bad boy that once made your heart beat rapidly. You can't deny that.”

You can’t, you can even feel it now, that familiar feeling of fiery passion that made you crave him, made you love every fibre of his being, made you wanna get inside of his skin so you wouldn’t have to be apart for even a second. His love consumed you, and it made you feel so alive. “Ran, stop. Please.” You entreat, your voice just above a whisper. 

“You still want me, don't you?” Ran smirks at you. “I know this, I know you better than anyone.”

“Please, don’t.” You murmur, your breaths continuing to come in heavy.

“Tell me you don't miss me.” He says, glancing at the way your chest rises and falls with your heavy breaths. “Tell me that you're happy right now with your boring life and your uninteresting boyfriend.” 

You can’t respond. You just quietly continue to return his gaze. “That's what I thought.” Ran chuckles. “You're just lying to yourself. You still want me, y/n. You know that we're soul mates.” 

“Fine. You’re right. You’re always right. But it doesn’t change anything. I just can’t. My parents would kick me out.” You say with a quiet and resigned tone.

“You're 18, y/n, you can make your own decisions.” Ran then smirks. “You don't have to listen to what your parents tell you. Because I know it's not what you want. You don't want to go down this path, the path that was chosen for you. You want to go down the path with me.”

You sigh deeply, “if I don’t follow their rules, they’ll kick me out.”

“You could always live with me.” Ran suggests, giving you a passionate look that captivates you. “You wouldn’t have to worry about your parents anymore.”

You raise an eyebrow, “you mean live with you and Rindou?” 

“Why not? It's better than living with your overbearing parents.” Ran smirks once again, “who knows, maybe he could be our third?”

“Don’t even joke about that.” You laugh. “You know how mad I got the last time you asked if you could share me with your brother.” 

“Mad? You were blushing like crazy when I asked you that. I thought you were actually excited about it.” Ran chuckles. “It was actually pretty cute.” 

You scoff, your face flushing. “Hey! I was not blushing.” You deny, but it’s true, you definitely were. 

Ran continues to smirk, he likes how you try to deny what's true when he clearly knows the difference. “Let me ask you this. Is that boyfriend of yours more manly than me? Is he better than me? Is he cuter than me?”

You take a deep breath and then exhale before you answer. “You know he isn’t.”

“Exactly. You know that you want to be with me, but you're forcing yourself to date this boring, uninteresting, and bland guy who doesn't know what you want.” Ran says, his penetrating gaze still fixed on you. 

“I know that. I know.” You say, your voice quiet and acquiescent. 

Ran grins widely, leaning his lips close to your ear. “What are you waiting for then?” He says, his voice just above a whisper. “Be with me now. Forget your parents. Forget about everything else. You only need me, y/n.”

Your breathing is frantic, and your heart is racing at his words as you gaze into his downturned eyes. “You want this, y/n,” Ran adds as he takes your chin in between his thumb and index finger. “I know you do. So say yes. Say yes and forget about everything other than me.”

“Would Rindou have a problem with me living there too?” You ask, wondering if it would really be okay for you to just move in out of nowhere, especially after not talking to either of them in months. 

“Do you really think that Rindou will be bothered by you living with him?” Ran smirks. “Besides, the more the merrier, right? You'll have two amazing, funny, handsome, and charming men to be with. Wouldn't that be ideal?”

You squint your eyes skeptically at him. “Why do you keep joking about sharing me with your brother?” 

“Because I actually like the idea.” Ran says, still smirking widely. “Two bad boys, both in love with you. That doesn't sound bad, does it? And who knows, if you're lucky, maybe the two of us would fight over you.”

You shake your head with closed eyes, “you’re something else, y’know that?”

Ran continues to grin, “so, is it a yes? Or are you so set on the idea that you want to live up to your parents' ideals?”

You nod disagreeably, “no. I don’t want to follow their stupid plan anymore. I wanna come with you. I wanna be with you.”

“That's my girl.” Ran says, his smirk still accompanying his face.

“Take me to my house to pack? And be ready to face my father.” It’s only your dad home right now, so you’ll only have to deal with one parent trying to stop you, thankfully.

“Oh, he’s gonna hate this.” Ran chuckles as he takes your hand in his. “Especially since it’s me. Are you ready?”

You smile, “more than ready.” Ran leads you to his motorcycle which is still parked in the parking lot of the coffee shop. Ran steps over the motorcycle and sits down, he reaches down to lift the kickstand before he puts the keys in the ignition and turns it on. You climb on the back of the bike and wrap your arms around his waist, feeling the muscles in his back tense as he revs the engine. The sound of the motorcycle fills your ears as you speed off, the wind whipping through your hair. 

When you finally arrive, Ran pulls over and turns off the ignition. He leans over to put down the kickstand with his heel before stepping off the bike. He turns to you and holds out his hand, a small smile playing at the corners of his mouth. You take his hand, and you both walk up to your door and go inside. Your dad's expression turns to disgust immediately when he notices who you’re with. 

You and Ran walk past your dad with his hand still in yours, heading to your room to start packing. Your dad follows, ready to give you shit for being with Ran, and then he sees you start packing a bag. “Where do you think you're going, young lady?” He asks sternly.

“I’m going to live with Ran, I’m done following your rules and the stupid life plan.” You say, your tone resolute. 

Your fathers face contorts with anger, “you’re going with him? He will never give you anything except for a bad future. You should be with a guy who's more respectable and someone who your mother and I would approve of.” 

Ran narrows his eyes at your father, “your daughter isn't a kid, you can't control her forever. Plus, I will take care of her.”

Your dad chuckles at Ran's audacity and smirks. “You can't talk to me like that, boy.”

Ran laughs, unbothered by his statement. “Your daughter seems to like me, and your input is not important to me.” 

You continue packing, hastily grabbing clothes and stuffing them in your bag, and also making sure to grab all the important things you'll need to take with you. 

Ran looks at you with a smirk. “Ready to move in with me?” He asks, adding fuel to the fire. Trying to piss your father off even more.

Your father snickers. “You're funny, boy, but not funny enough. No daughter of mine will end up with a punk like you.” He says. “She's going to listen to me.”

“And who says that your daughter will listen to you?” Ran glances at you, his smirk still there and his expression cocky. “She's with me now, old man. You have zero control over her.”

“Don't you dare talk to me like tha-” Your dad is cut off by your voice, which becomes stern as you shout, “you can't force me anymore, I'm an adult! I'm going to live with Ran and you can't do anything about it.”

Ran’s smirk grows wider. “See, old man?”

Your father's expression becomes even angrier. “So you're just going to listen to that thug over us? The people that care about you?”

“Ran cares about me. He loves me.” You snap back.

Ran chuckles at that. “Well said, y/n.”

Your dad glares at Ran, his fury on the verge of erupting. “Ran makes me happy. I want him, and you’re not gonna keep me from him any longer.” You add.

Your dad’s now about to blow a fuse. He takes a deep breath, calming himself down. “If you think that this boy is able to give you love, then you need a reality check. He'll only break your heart.”

Ran scoffs, “if you think that I will break y/n’s heart then you’re the one who needs a reality check, old man.” 

Your dad continues to glare at Ran, “do you really expect me to believe that a delinquent, a member of a gang, is going to make my daughter happy? Do you think I will let you, a punk, and a street rat have my daughter?” 

Your dad now starts walking over to you as you continue to pack. “He's only going to bring you sorrow, y/n. Don't you dare follow this path that will lead you into destruction and ruin. Stay with us, your family, your home.” Your dad says, before he puts his arm protectively around you. 

“Dad, I love him.” Your voice is firm, but your eyes start to water.

“Y/n, dear.” Your father's tone is softened as he speaks, as if to comfort you. But his demeanour stays strict and hard. “We can't let this boy get a hold of you. Don't you understand what he truly is? Someone who lives in violence, who is part of a gang. He is not a good person.”

“You don't get it, Dad, I don't care that Ran is a delinquent, I don't care if he's part of a gang. He gives me something no other man could ever give to me. I love him.” Your voice is still stern, you wanna get your point across. “You can't change my mind, Dad.”

Ran smiles at your words, then decides to butt in. “Oh, come on now. You think you’re gonna keep my girl stuck in your prison of a household? You think that’s the best for her? Because if so, you're way mistaken. I’m her soulmate, she wants to be with me. I will love her and care for her way more than you ever will. Let her be happy for once, old man.” 

Your dad stares at Ran, his expression turning cold once more as he takes a deep breath. “She will not be going with you.”

Your eyes narrow, “dad-”

“No.” Your dad interrupts. “We'll not be discussing this any longer.” He says, before his eyes turn from you, then back to Ran. “She's not going with you, you punk.”

Ran steps closer to your dad. “And who's going to stop her?” He leans closer, now glaring down at your dad. “I'm the guy she loves, and she's coming with me. There's nothing you can do.” He smirks as he stands upright. “Y/n, come on. Time for us to go, my love.”

You finish packing and you begin walking out, but your dad steps in front of you. “Stop right there, young lady. You are not going with this punk.”

Ran steps closer, “back off, old man. Before you get hurt.”

“Dad, let me go. I'm not staying here anymore, Ran is my boyfriend. I love him, there's nothing you can do about that. So, move.”

Your dad is looking annoyed at Ran's behaviour. You however, is now looking at Ran with a smile. 

Ran returns your gaze and smile with smug confidence. Your dad's glare is still stern as he faces Ran. “Look kid, you're only making things worse for yourself. I don't know what world you live in, but a guy like you won't make y/n happy.”

“Dad, I love him. Please, just let me be with him.” You say, before you try stepping around your father.

Your dad grabs you by the arm. “Absolutely not.” Ran doesn't like this, and he gets slightly more heated. He smirks and steps in between you and your dad. “Don't touch her, old man.” He says with a stern gaze. “I know what's best for her, and so does she.”

You try pulling your arm out of your dad's grasp. “Let go of me.”

“And who are you to tell me what's best for her?” Your dad asks Ran angrily. He still didn't let go of your arm. “I know what's best for her. I will not have her go on a path of destruction with you.”

You try harder to get out of your dad's grip. “I want to be with Ran. You and mom have never been supportive of me, let go of me right now!”

“Y/n, be realistic. You can't possibly think this punk will be able to give you a better life.”

“He will, because I enjoy being with him!” You yell.

Your dad scoffs. “This guy is an outlaw, a gang member, a member of one of the largest gangs in Yokohama. He’ll probably get you killed one day!” 

Ran narrows his eyes, that statement really pissed him off. He pushes your dad out of the way, which causes your dad to hit up against the wall. Ran grabs your wrist hard and pulls you, “y/n, let's go.” Ran drags you out of the house and back to his motorcycle. He forcefully sits you down on the bike. You follow suit, bringing your other leg over the seat. Ran gets on and quickly starts up the bike.

Your dad comes running out, but before he could get close, Ran just takes off. Your dad stares at the two of you driving off. “Y/n! You stupid girl!” He yells. 

Ran glances back at your dad as he continues driving. “Looks like you pissed him off, love.”

You laugh and shrug, “all well.” As you both ride through the busy streets of Yokohama, your expression turns to a soft smile.

“Do you feel better now? No longer being imprisoned by your parents’ rules and life plan.” Ran asks as he reaches behind him, placing a hand on your thigh to caress it as he glances at you in the mirror for a moment. You nod, “much better.”

“Glad to hear it.” Ran continues driving until you arrive at his place. “Home sweet home.” He says with a smirk. Ran picks you up and carries you inside bridal style. 

Rindou's eyes widen and his body shoots up from he couch he was laying on when he sees you. He jumps off the couch and rushes over to the both of you, somewhat blushing over Ran carrying you in his arms. “Y/n?!”

You look toward Rindou, “what’s up bud? You look excited to see me.” You say with a slight smirk. 

Ran chuckles. “He's probably wondering what it feels like to touch your smooth skin.” He says to you. 

Rindou blushes even more. "I was surprised to see you back with my brother.”

You smile, “well I am.”

Ran brings you to the couch and sits down, still holding you bridal style on his lap. Rindou follows you both over to the couch and sits down beside. 

“He's still after you, y’know.” Ran chuckles.

You look at Rindou. “Still pining after me, huh?” You tease.

“Maybe I am.” Rindou says seriously, a small smile playing at the corners of his mouth.

Ran kisses you on the cheek, before he reaches out and grabs the bottle of whiskey that’s on the end table. He untwists the cap and takes a swig of the alcohol, then he offers the bottle to you, “lets celebrate your first day of freedom, yeah?”

You smirk and take the bottle, bringing the top to your lips. As you take a swig, you can feel the liquid slide down your throat, the warmth spreading through your chest. The whiskey's flavour lingers on your tongue, and you can feel the burn of the alcohol as it goes down. You pass the bottle back to Ran, who offers it up to Rindou. Rindou takes the bottle from Ran and takes a long swig, before passing it back to Ran, who takes another drink. 

“So, Rindou. Ran decided to let me live with you guys.” You insert, and Ran passes you the bottle again.

Rindou looks surprised, as if he wasn't expecting to hear that. “What?! You're living with us? You're not staying with your family?”

You take another swig, letting out a slight cough before you speak. “No, I don't think I want to live with the people who never let me do the things that I want. I'm tired of following their rules, I just want to live with the two of you and not have to worry about all the expectations my parents have.” 

Rindou raises an eyebrow with a slight smirk, “what will your parents think of this?”

“I already told them, they aren't happy. They're probably going to try to make me come back tomorrow.” You say, passing the bottle to Rindou. 

“Don't worry about that, if they do that, I'll just let them have a piece of me.” Ran inserts.

Rindou takes the bottle from you and takes another swig before replying. “You’re sure about this?” He says, before passing the bottle back to Ran who takes another sip. 

“I am.” You say, your tone resolute. 

“Is that so?” Rindou smirks. “Well, glad to have you here.” Rindou says in flirtatious tone.

You nod with a smile, and Ran passes you the bottle once again. “Oh wow, sounds like you're trying to make a move on my girl, Rindou.” Ran grins. You take another swig of the alcohol before passing it back to Rindou.

“Maybe I am.” Rindou says, taking the bottle from you while meeting your gaze.

“Maybe you are? Wait, are you? If you are, you've got some balls to do such a thing.” You laugh.

Ran chuckles, and Rindou takes another sip before responding. “You're right, I do have some guts to flirt with the girl who is my brother's girlfriend.” He says, then speaks to Ran as he passes the bottle back to him. “Though, that doesn't mean I'd ever give up. Ran.” He smirks. 

“You're still crushing on her, huh?” Ran asks, his lips curled upward into a slight smile as he takes another sip of whiskey, then passes the bottle to you once again.

“I'm still crushing on her.” He answers. 

You take a swig and then shake your head, “Rindou, you're such an idiot for liking your brother's girlfriend.” You say, then you pass Rindou the bottle.

Ran chuckles, “she’s right, why would you have a crush on someone who is taken? Why not another girl instead?” He says.

“Because you took her. You took my chance at her. You took one of the sweetest girls in this entire world. And now she's yours and not mine, I can never kiss her, I can never hug her, I can never do anything that I want with her.” Rindou says, before taking a really long swig of whiskey this time. 

You look at Rindou with a slight smile, now starting to feel the affects of the alcohol, bringing about your playful side further. “Oh, so you’ve been longing to kiss me, huh Rindou?”

Rindou blushes as he passes the bottle back to Ran, his eyes still fixed on you. “Yeah, for a while now, I've been longing to kiss you. For years I’ve been thinking of kissing you and doing all the couple activities with you, but oh well.”

Ran takes the bottle with a grin before laughing. “Damn, you really did want a taste of my girl, huh, Rindou?” He takes another drink and then passes the bottle back to you. You take another sip with a smile, amused by this conversation.

Rindou smirks. “Heh, I may have dreamt of it, once or twice.”

You’re now giggling. “You dreamt of it?” You ask in a soft but teasing tone. “Tell me more about your dreams.” You say as you pass the bottle to him with a coy smile. Ran’s giggling as well, he seems entertained by this conversation too. 

“What? You wanna know about my dreams of you and me?” He chuckles as he takes the bottle from you.

“Yes, I do. Tell me more.” You say, your lips still curled upward into a smile.

“This is turning spicy all of a sudden.” Ran says quietly, his voice tinged with amusement.

Rindou takes in a long sip before speaking. “Well, I don't want to startle you with them. They're kinda… dirty.”

You raise an eyebrow. “Startle me? Now you're making me even more curious. Please, do tell. Tell me everything.” You grin.

Rindou passes the bottle back to Ran, his eyes still on you. “Are you sure?”

You nod, “I am very much so sure.”

Ran takes another swig from the bottle. “Do it! Let's see where this goes.” He grins, then passes the bottle back to you. 

Rindou smirks, “okay fine. In my dream…” He pauses for a moment, “you were, in my bed. Naked of course.” 

You raise an eyebrow and take a sip before you speak. “And what were we doing?” You ask, now passing the bottle back to Rindou, a grin still plastered on your face.

Ran smirks as this whole conversation is entertaining him. Rindou takes in a long sip of the whiskey, then passes it back to Ran before he speaks. “Well, I fucked you good, obviously.” He says smugly. 

You feel heat rush to your groin, and a tingle shoot down your spine at his words. You take a deep breath, then exhale, “what else happened?”

Ran laughs out loud with his head tilted back, he’s so invested. He takes another swig of the whiskey, then hands the bottle to you once again.

“I made you cum so many times you lost count of how many.” Rindou answers. 

Your body flushes with heat and you could feel yourself getting wet, and the effects the alcohol were having on you definitely weren’t helping. After you finish another sip, you pass the bottle back to Rindou before placing your legs over his as you continue to lay over Ran’s lap, your head resting against the armrest. “Are you sure that’s all? Nothing you’re leaving out?” You chuckle.

“Oooh, someone's getting a touch of the feelings now aren't we? I like the tension between you two.” Ran smirks.

Rindou takes the bottle and grins. “Fine, I may have left out a few details.”

You raise an eyebrow, “oh yeah? Like what?”

“Well, let’s just say I ate the fuck outta you.” Rindou answers before taking another swig, his eyes still fixed on you. 

You couldn’t help but feel yourself get wetter at his words, and you shift your body slightly. 

“Ooooh, Rindou, you're a pervert aren't you?” Ran teases. 

Rindou rolls his eyes at Ran and passes the bottle back to him, not even responding to that statement. You sit up as you’re on Ran’s lap and reach over to Rindou’s thigh, as if testing the waters. The alcohol clearly got you. You glance at Ran for a moment, taking into account that he isn’t objecting. You now move from Ran’s lap to Rindou’s, only straddling him. 

Rindou's eyes widen. “Holy shit?!” He thought.

Ran smirks as he sees you straddling Rindou. He now feels a little giddy and excited to see where this goes. You smile widely as you lean your face in closer to Rindou’s, and you lightly sway your lower body against him. 

Ran is grinning widely. “Ooooh, this is getting good.” He says to himself, before taking in another sip of the whiskey. 

Rindou gulps hard as he feels you brush your lower body against him and place your arms on his shoulders. Rindou’s chest starts to rise and fall rapidly, his breathing heavy as his heart begins to race. 

You look at Ran as he sips on the whiskey, before looking back at Rindou. You bring your face closer to Rindou's and lean in close to his lips. Then you place your lips on his softly. The moment Rindou had always wanted has come, he’s finally getting to feel what it’s like to touch his brothers girl who he’s been in love with for so long. Rindou felt his heart in his throat as he felt your lips press against his own. He places his hands on your hips, pulling you against him in an attempt to feel you on a more intimate level. He's never felt this excited with someone before. Never felt this warm with anyone before. He didn't want your lips to part, it felt so right.

You moan into the kiss and run your hands over his upper body, feeling up his chest and arm muscles. Rindou couldn't contain himself anymore. He wanted to feel more of you. He couldn't stop himself from deepening the kiss. You moan softly against his lips as you feel Rindou's grip tighten on you. 

Ran chuckles amusedly as he continues to sip on the whiskey and watch. You continue to moan and squirm, you’re really feeling the kiss as you press yourself against Rindou. Rindou slowly picks you up for a moment, his lips still on yours as he lays you on the couch on your back, your head on the armrest. He then lays over you, pressing his lower body against you as you both continue making out. Rindou’s hand slowly caresses your cheek and your hair, as he looks down at you, his breaths hot and heavy. Rindou now speaks with a husky voice, “you’re really beautiful, y/n. I want you so, so badly.” He says before kissing you again.

You moan into the kiss before responding, “then take me.” You say before kissing him again.

Ran gasps as he hears you say the magic words. “Oh, my my.” He mutters while smiling widely, the bottle of whiskey in his hand, bottom of it rested on his thigh as he watches. Rindou continues to kiss you, before answering back, his voice just above a whisper. “Is that something you really want, sweetheart?” He asks before kissing you again. You pause for a second and look at Ran to ask for permission, “is that fine by you Ran?”

Ran smirks from the corner of the couch the three of you are on. “Do you think I'm going to object to my brother being intimate with my girl?” He asks rhetorically with a smug grin as he takes another sip of whiskey.

“Well, if you’re okay with it.” You say, before meeting Rindou’s gaze once again. “There you go, Ran’s fine with it. So, why not have some fun?” You grin.

Rindou smirks at you, he’s finally, finally getting his chance with you after it’s all he’s been wanting for so long. “I've been holding myself back for so long, but not...” He trials off with a deep breath, “not anymore.” He speaks with a husky tone. Rindou now reaches his hands under your shirt as he presses his lips hard against yours. You slowly move your hands over his back and wrap your legs around his waist, pulling his lower body even firmer against yours. Your breaths are becoming more audible and loud with Rindou’s, as your heart is beating hard and fast now. The pleasure and the passion is intense. Rindou now pulls your shirt off, revealing your upper body and bra. Rindou licks his lips at the sight, before he slides his hands underneath your back. You slightly lift your body, letting him undo your bra. He pulls it off and chucks it aside. You now feel his hands hungrily explore your body, before you reach out and pull his shirt off of him. He's very fit and muscular like Ran, and the tattoo that matches with Ran’s stretches over the right side of his body. Both you and Rindou can feel the intensity building between the two of you. You continue to kiss Rindou while feeling his body up, you can't help but feel excited for what's to come. “Mm, Rin.” You moan in a soft and quiet voice. Rindou chuckles at the nickname you would always use, now being moaned. Ran just smirks and watches with a smug face like a voyeur as you moan Rindou's name. 

“I want you, Rindou.” You say in a hushed and needy voice while your hands continue to feel him up, your fingers brushing along his abs. Rindou groans and bites his lower lip, hearing the words he’s been longing to hear his brothers girl say for so long. “Fuck.” He mutters, his breaths still hot and heavy as he reaches down to the waistband of his pants, quickly pulling them down and then shifting his body weight slightly to take them off. He throws them aside and then quickly does the same with his boxers, now revealing his hard, hurting length. Rindou grabs onto your pants and aggressively pulls them off, followed by your panties. Both of you are now fully exposed, your naked body's touching. Your hand goes to Rindou's throbbing shaft, and he lets out a deep moan. Rindou’s hands are now all over you, feeling up every inch of your soft skin. You continue to rub him and moan softly as Rindou’s hands caress you all over. Ran continues to watch from the corner of the couch, and now feeling a little excited over the events before him. 

Rindou is enjoying the feeling of your hands on him, he can feel his lower part getting harder with every touch. He places his hand on your leg and slowly starts to inch it up to your pussy. When his fingers meet your clit, you gasp and moan. “Mmm, Rin.” Your voice is filled with pleasure and your body starts to quiver slightly from the feeling. “Fuck y/n.” Rindou groans, and his fingers now slowly slide into your entrance, making him groan again as his arousal grows. You moan loudly in response to the feeling of Rindou’s fingers, and Ran continues to watch with a smirk, getting all hot and bothered by this whole thing. Your whole body is quivering from pleasure now, and Rindou’s really enjoying this. “God, you're so damn beautiful.” He mutters with a husky voice. You cant help but sustain loud moans and squirm as your body continues to tremble from Rindou’s fingers working your entrance. “She seems to be enjoying it, Ran.” Rindou says with a sly voice and a chuckle.

Ran smirks. “Oh, for sure she is. Keep doing a good job Rindou.” Ran says in his authoritative big-brotherly tone. 

Your moans begin to get louder as you now feel Rindou seek out your g-spot and start giving taps to it directly. Your eyes widen, “Rin!” You moan. Rindou lets out a low growl, he can’t hold back any longer. He abruptly pulls his fingers out of you and grabs his hurting and swollen length, quickly positioning the tip to your entrance and sliding himself inside until he bottoms out. Ran lets out a low groan as he watches Rindou take you fully, and his eyes widen. “My god.” He says with a husky voice. Your moans turn more extreme as you feel Rindou start thrusting. You can’t help but lose yourself in the pleasure. “Mmm, Rin…” You moan again. Rindou continues to take you to a whole new high, your body is shaking with pleasure. You feel your mind being drowned in a sea of euphoria. You start to grab onto Rindou's back, digging your nails in his skin while moaning his name loud enough to where even the neighbours could probably hear. Rindou moans and bites his lower lip. “Y/n…” He says in a breathy voice. The whole sight before Ran's eyes is turning him more and more on by the second. He places the whiskey bottle down on the end table and starts gripping the armrest with his hand. Rindou begins to speed up his thrusts, making sure to hit as deep as possible with each one. “Nngh, Rin!” You yell.

Ran is now feeling very hot, his heart beating fast and his breath getting heavier with every passing second at the sight before him. The passion is driving you and Rindou wild with desire and lust, and Rindou smiles as he watches your beautiful face radiating pure pleasure. You continue to let out loud moans, and Rindou speeds up his pace even more. Ran gulps hard at the sight in front of him. “My god...” He mumbles to himself as he feels his arousal growing. 

Your whole body is twitching now as you continue to feel Rindou inside of you. Your eyes start rolling back, the pleasure becoming too much for you to handle. “Yes... yes!” You moan, feeling waves of pleasure rushing through your body rapidly as tingles shoot down your spine and to your core. “Oh my god...!” Ran says, gripping the armrest tightly as he can't take his eyes away from the scene before him. “Oh, oh Rin!” You shout in pleasure. Rindou smiles once again as he moves his head down and kisses your neck while he continues his fast thrusts at a steady pace. “You're so perfect, y/n.” He says before kissing his way to your shoulder. Your body is twitching uncontrollably as the pleasure and passion continues to intensify. Your voice is nothing but a series of moans and Rindou’s name now. Ran's grip on the armrest tightens, “my god...” He says again and he’s so aroused that he now had to slip a hand down to his bulge, as he continues to grip the armrest with his other hand. Ran eyes are glued to what's going on in front of him. “Oh my god...” He says before he begins to grip at his bulge now.

Rindou eyes are filled with pure lust as he lets out another groan, “you're perfect.” He whispers to you. Your eyes continue to roll back, as your moans get louder. You lean your head back and let yourself go fully under the wave of pleasure. “Mmh! Rin!” You moan loudly. Ran starts to unzip his pants, his arousal becoming too much to bear. He whips out his length, grabbing his throbbing shaft before lightly starting to jerk it. Rindou brings his lips to yours and kisses you passionately. “You’re making me go crazy.” He says in a hushed tone, before resuming kissing you. Your moans are loud and echo throughout the living-room, you’re really losing yourself in the intense pleasure that Rindou's giving you right now. Rindou goes back to kissing your neck and shoulder, “I can't believe I’m finally getting to have you, baby.” He mutters, his breath hot and heavy against your ear. You’re starting to breathe even more heavily now, Rindou's touch is starting to become overwhelming for you. “Mmm. Rin.” You moan. Ran continues to watch and lightly stroke his dick. “Oh... my god...” He says quietly, his voice filled with arousal.

You could now feel yourself getting closer and closer to an orgasm. Rindou's eyes look into yours. “I'm so fuckin’ in love with you.” He says, his breath hitched. Rindou was now getting close to his breaking point too, as his thrusts now became sloppy. Your moans become even louder now, your whole body twitching as you’re completely lost in the incredible pleasure that Rindou is giving you. Ran's breathing gets deeper, as he continues to watch and pleasure himself. You could now feel the edge approaching. “Mmm, Rin! I’m soon gonna-”

Rindou groans. “Fuck, I love you.” Rindou could feel the edge approaching for him as well. You grip the fabric of the couch and your legs shiver, the wave of pleasure crashing over you like a tidal wave. “Rin!” You scream out, your body convulsing against Rindou’s as your walls pulsate around his length, bringing about his limit as well. “Oh, oh fuuck.” Rindou groans, looking at you with a hazy gaze. Rindou spills his last drop of cum inside of you, before he gently pulls out, making a hissing sound as he does so. Ran now stands up and walks over to you. “My turn.” He says with a sly smirk as his body is already mostly undressed, besides the shirt he has on which he sexily pulls off as he walks over. You take a moment to get ahold of your breath. You feel so light headed now after that climax, but at the same time you feel so good. The feeling was unreal. You look up at Ran as he’s now standing beside the couch, towering over you. “R-Ran.” You say in a cute tone, your breaths still coming in a bit short. Rindou moves over to lay down beside you on his side, before he starts giving kisses to your cheek and jawline. Ran gets in the position Rindou was in, laying over you and ready to take you now. Your body shivers when you feel Ran’s tip start circling over your entrance, meanwhile Rindou's now kissing down your neck, giving it occasional bites and sucks. Ran now slides himself inside of you fully in one quick motion, “mmm fuck yeah. Just like how I remembered. Tight as fuck.” Ran reminisces. 

“Mmh, Ran!” You yell. Ran smiles before he starts his thrusts off fast, his braids bouncing with the movement as he gradually speeds up his pace while watching your facial expression with those downturned purple eyes.

The sound of you and Ran’s moans fill the living-room, along with the sound of his body smacking into yours. Your eyes catch his hazed gaze, and heavy breaths escape his parted lips. You run your hands over Ran’s body, feeling his tensing muscles under your fingers. Ran lets out a low groan, before he brings his lips to yours and slides his tongue in your mouth. His tongue explodes your mouth, and your tongue meets his in a wet and sloppy french-kiss. Your body was experiencing complete ecstasy. Just like how you remembered. The passion Ran would give you was like a drug, and you’re now getting a hit of that drug you’ve been deprived of for months. Ran's breathing gets deeper as he speeds up his pace and goes harder, and he now breaks away from the kiss to watch your facial expression. Your passion for him only intensifies with each motion, as the pace increased, your breaths grew heavier. The love you feel for each other is undeniable and you both feel it in every part of your being. Rindou bites and kisses at your shoulder, listening to your sweet moans and growing addicted to the taste and scent of your skin. You could now feel your body thrum with anticipation as your limit begins to approach. You can feel each other's excitement building and your nerves starting to flutter. Every movement and touch is charged with emotion, and your heart is racing faster and faster as you edge closer to your limit. “Mmmh, Ran!” You yell. 

“Fuck fuck fuck.” Ran groans as his body shudders, feeling himself getting closer and closer to the edge as well. As if on cue, the build up of tension reaches its peak for the both of you. A couple more thrusts and you both cum together, your body’s convulsing against one another. Your walls pulsate around Ran’s length as you cum, giving him a good squeeze. Ran chuckles, “fuckin’ missed how you’d milk my dick.” 

Ran’s words send a tingle down your spine and to your core, which only adds to your orgasm. Ran spills his last drop inside of you before he pulls out, then he picks you up and brings you to his bedroom. “C’mon Rindou.” Ran says in his nasally sounding voice. Rindou follows suit. Ran places you down on the bed and then climbs up to lay next to you on his side, pulling your body to face him. Rindou comes and cuddles you from behind, wrapping his arm around your waist. Ran wastes no time before he slips a hand down and grabs his length to put it inside of you again. You moan and bite your lower lip, taking in the feeling of being filled back up by him. Rindou starts grinding his dick against your ass, and he lets out a deep breath as he wants to be inside of you again too. Rindou grabs his shaft and looks down, before rubbing his tip up and down the lining of your asscrack, teasing himself, before an idea comes to his mind. He brings his tip to your asshole and rubs it over the tiny entrance, “fuck.” He groans, his voice barely above a whisper. He brings his face in closer to your ear, “can I enter here?” He asks in a breathy voice as he taps his tip against your asshole. Meanwhile Ran’s thrusting into your pussy again, and your eyes widen when you hear Rindou’s request and feel him tapping his tip against the back entrance. You’re a bit nervous to try anal for the first time, losing your back-door virginity can be quite painful, but you’re intrigued by the idea. You nod, “yeah…” You answer in a soft voice. Rindou lets out a deep breath at your answer, “fuck baby...” He says in a husky voice before he forces the tip inside, which makes him choke out, “ah, sweet jesus. That’s insane. I might not even be able to fit, it’s fuckin’ small.” 

Your eyes shot open when you felt his tip inside your asshole, even that amount was bringing about pain, as you could feel the muscles start to stretch. But, the pain, is a good kind of pain, and the intensity and heat of the moment makes the experience so fucking passionate. “K-Keep going.” You say to Rindou. Ran chuckles with a sly smirk at you telling Rindou to go further in your ass. Rindou lets out a low groan, “okay, I’ll try baby.” He says, his breaths heavy as he starts to force himself further inside. Rindou grits his teeth and clenches his jaw as his eyes roll to the back of his head, “fuck, god fuckin’ damn it that’s tight.” He moans, before finally he bottoms out in your ass. You took the pain well, you actually really liked it, and the feeling of being filled by both of them only fuels the heat building deep within your core, which makes your pussy and asshole walls clench for a moment. Rindou was about to take a moment to gather himself before his eyes shoot open and he chokes out in a “gah” sounding moan. “Whoa, hey there. You’re gonna kill me, sweetheart.” Rindou smirks, his breath hitched. “Do it again.”

It wasn’t even voluntary since it was happening because your orgasm was forming, so it happens again. Rindou’s eyes roll to the back of his head and his jaw clenches as he lets out a hiss, “sssss, fuuck.” 

Rindou now begins moving, starting off slow until you get used to the feeling, then he starts matching his pace with Ran’s. Both of their hands roam your body as they continue to move in and out of you. As their hands roam over your body, the intensity of the experience only grows, leaving you breathless and shaking with excitement. Your moans and yells of their names fill the room, along with their groans and the slaps of their bodies against you. You could now feel yourself getting close to the edge. Ran is going faster and faster now, getting closer to his breaking point, and Rindou speeds up his pace to keep in sync with Ran. Rindou was experiencing complete bliss. He never thought he’d ever get the chance to have you in this way. But now, not only has he expressed his love to you intimately, now he got to try anal with you; his brothers girlfriend who he’s been in love with and wanted for so long. 

You continue to moan as you grip the sheets, and your voice becomes louder and louder with each passing moment. Ran and Rindou's eyes meet for a moment and Rindou gives him a coy smile as he's having his way with you from the other door. Ran smirks and continues to thrust harder. Rindou was now chasing down an orgasm, and the three of you were now getting closer and closer to the peak of pleasure. The next thrust of the Haitani brothers sends you over the edge. Your entire body trembles with an intense feeling of euphoria and release. Your breathing comes in short gasps now, and your voice is lost in a series of moans. Your pussy and asshole walls pulsate, squeezing the fuck out of them, Rindou more. Your clenching walls brings about both of their orgasms. Ran’s eyes roll to the back of his head, “mmm, fuck yeah baby, milk my dick.” Ran says in a husky voice. Rindou’s eyes go wide and his whole body tenses up, “gaaaah, fuuck! It feels like my dick’s gonna break, but it’s so fuckin’ good, holy shit!” 

They both spill the last drop, and then finally they both pull out. You turn on your back, and they both each cuddle into you on their sides. Rindou looks at you and smiles before he starts caressing your cheek. “You’re so cute.”

“Well, that just happened.” Ran says with a chuckle and a sly grin.

You turn your head slightly towards Ran and chuckle too. “Yeah, that just happened.” You say with a smile before looking at Rindou.

Rindou smirks, still caressing your cheek before he leans his face in closer to give you a quick romantic kiss on the lips. “I love you, y/n.”

Ran raises an eyebrow at the romantics, “now now, Rindou. She’s still my girlfriend.” 

Rindou turns his head to look at Ran. “Oh you, I'm just showing her how much I love her.” He chuckles. 

Ran continues to keep a raised eyebrow, then he smirks at Rindou. “Hm, is that so? Well, if you ask nicely, maybe I’ll continue to share her with you. I wouldn’t mind if she belonged to both of us, there’s no one better than you who can protect her, besides me.” Ran says in a playful voice. 

Rindou chuckles, “oh really now? Well, in that case, I think I will ask nicely.” He says in a teasing tone. “Big bro, will you be ever so kind as to continue sharing y/n with me?” He says in a dramatic tone, returning the playful antics. 

“Yes, Rindou. You have my permission to take her for yourself as well.” Ran smirks.

You squints your eyes at Ran, listening to the audacity of his words. “You know Ran, you never even asked my input on you offering to Rindou that I belong to the both of you.” You insert, though you’re not even the slightest bit opposed to the idea. 

Ran smirks. “Well, I'm sure you wouldn't mind if Rindou and I both shared you, after that just now.” He teases you.

“Fine, maybe I do want that. I do want the both of you.” You admit.

Rindou smiles, “heh, that’s my girl.” He takes your chin in between his thumb and index finger, slightly pulling your face towards his to kiss you once again, his lips pressing against yours. His tongue brushes up against yours but it wasn't anything too deep, just enough to tease. You kiss back with equal enthusiasm and passion, your own tongue seeking out his before your tongues engage in battle with one another's. You open your mouth a bit more and Rindou slides his tongue deeper inside your mouth. 

Ran has an amused expression. “I think you’re getting a little attached Rindou, and so soon. You look like you can’t get enough of her.” Ran teases, knowing damn well he’s the same way to you. 

Rindou smirks, “maybe I am getting more attached than I intended, but who can resist her?” He says before resuming kissing you. You hum as you and Rindou continue your french kiss, and you run your hands through his blond and blue hair. You’re completely immersed in the moment and you can't get enough. Your lips are practically glued to Rindou's lips and you’re holding onto a fist-full of Rindou's hair. Rindou smiles. “That's my girl.” His voice is husky, he's completely obsessed with you and your body. His hands return to your soft skin, caressing it. 

“Don’t you mean our girl?” Ran corrects playfully.

Rindou just smirks and pulls you to face him. You’re now on your side once again as he continues kissing you, and he gives your ass a little grab. Rindou's breathing becomes heavier, he feels as if he can't let go of you. His hands start to caress you a little more. You let out a low but soft moan, as your tongues continue to dance together. Your breaths are hot and heavy against Rindou's. Ran moves on his side to wrap his arms around you from behind, giving kisses and bites to your shoulder now. You could feel Ran's kisses and bites on your skin, adding to the heat. Rindou takes your hand in his, intertwining your fingers with his and giving your hand a squeeze as his mouth is still locked with yours, exchanging saliva, giving you one hell of a make-out session. 

Rindou smirks and lets go of your hand, bringing his down to your thigh and sliding it up the skin, inching its way to your pussy. With his hand touching your skin and inching towards your intimate area, you feel like you need to hold your breath. You can feel the need for him building within you, the intensity of the moment growing as your muscles tighten in anticipation. As Rindou's hand reaches your intimate area, you feel the anticipation heighten and the tension within you rise to a boiling point. Your body arches in an attempt to get closer to Rindou's hand, your breath coming in quick shallow gasps. 

Rindou takes his index and middle finger together and flattens them before rubbing circles over your clit, causing you to squeal against his lips. Rindou’s dick throbs in response to your squeal, and he lets out a low groan. “Fuck babe.” He says in a husky voice. Rindou now takes his two fingers and brings them to your entrance, sliding them in while using his thumb to start drawing circles over your clit. Rindou immediately seeks out your g-spot and curls his fingers upward, brushing his fingertips against your g-spot in a fast motion, using his thumb to match the pace on your clit. “Oh, oh Rin!” You moan.

“Oh god baby...” Rindou mutters. Meanwhile Ran is now licking and sucking the skin of your neck and shoulders, leaving you hickeys. You could feel your whole body trembling from the heat of your make out session with Rindou as he works your entrance and clit with his fingers. Your hand grips tightly onto Rindou’s hair to the point where it nearly hurts him, bringing about his arousal to an even higher point. 

Rindou abruptly stops kissing you and pulls his fingers out of you, then grabs his shaft to position the tip to your entrance, before he slides in slowly, his eyes hazy as he gazes at your facial expression, watching you take him. “Mmm fuck, I fuckin’ love how you feel.” Rindou says in a husky voice. Rindou takes a hand under your leg and lifts it up as he starts moving faster inside of you. You can't help but moan in pleasure as you feel the heat inside of you rising up. “Mm! Rin!” You moan loudly. Rindou smiles as he hears your moans, and he speeds up his thrusts a bit more as he continues to hold your leg up. Ran’s now swaying his hips forward, rubbing his shaft against your ass, before he grabs his dick and looks down. He wants to have his try at anal now. Ran brings his tip to your asshole, testing the size. He lets out a little hiss at the anticipation, before he forces the tip in. You gasp from the sensation, and your eyes shoot open wide. Ran lets out another hiss at the squeeze of his tip, “holy shit.” He says in a breathy voice, before he slides further inside, his eyes rolling back at the tightness, “god damn.”

Ran finally bottoms out and starts moving, letting out throaty moans at the feeling of his dick being squeezed. He’s taken aback by the experience. “Didn’t expect it to squeeze so much.” Ran says to Rindou with a chuckle.

Rindou grins, “it is a pretty tight squeeze huh? Feels like yer dick’s gonna snap in half if you make even one wrong move.” He replies as he continues his thrusts into your pussy. 

Ran nods, “it’s some next-level shit.” He lets out a deep breath.

The three of you are united as one, and the feeling of both of them thrusting into you is euphoric. The passion and heat between you is palpable, and you feel their bodies and breathing as if it were your own. There is a level of intimacy and passion that words cannot describe. “Mm…” Ran lets out a low and soft moan of pleasure as he grips you tighter by the waist from behind. “I’m fuckin’ loving this..”

You grip Rindou's hair once again, feeling the heat building up all throughout your body. Ran is letting out repetitive throaty moans as the feeling of your anal walls is just too much for him right now. Rindou continues to gaze hazily at your facial expression, his moans escaping his lips frequently as well, enjoying the feeling of it all as his hand grips your leg tighter. The feeling of his dick pressing deep inside your pussy is now bringing him closer to the edge. Your moans become louder with the sensation of pleasure coursing through you. Each thrust of the Haitani’s is bringing you closer and closer to your peak. Ran bites down on your shoulder, his body trembling and his breathing becoming more and more desperate as he feels your anal walls starting to tighten and tighten, bringing about his limit as well. His body shudders and his eyes roll back, “oh fuck, oh fuck.” 

Rindou's lets out a low hiccupy groan, he can feel your pussy walls starting to tighten more and more and he's losing it too. “Fuck yeah baby, you feel so fuckin’ good.” 

A few more thrusts, and Ran and Rindou bring you to the peak of pleasure and your body explodes in a rush of sensation. Your heart pounds violently in your chest and your breathing becomes shallow, your voice nothing more than a series of moaning gasps. Your pussy and asshole walls pulsate around Ran and Rindou, bringing about both of their orgasms. Rindou lets out a prolonged groan as he cums, his body twitching. “Fuck, mmm, fuck!”

The squeezing of your anal walls as Ran came sent his mind into a frenzy, his eyes rolling back as he grits his teeth. “Gaaah, mmm, sweet fuck!” He yells. 

After a moment, the Haitani brothers pull out of you and they collapse on each a side of you, your entire bodies still buzzing with sensations. Ran and Rindou’s heads fall back, their chests rising and falling rapidly as they try and catch their breaths. You can hear the pounding of your heart in your ears from the aftermath of your orgasm. Not long after, the three of you come back down to earth, taking in the afterglow as your bodies still feel warm and tingly. They both turn on their sides and cuddle into you. “You’re unbelievable.” Rindou says, still breathing heavy. Ran takes a deep breath, “fuck y/n, I never thought I’d ever experience what it’s like to go in the back door.” He says with a breathy chuckle. 

Rindou butts in, “I know right?” He says in a instigating and teasing tone. 

Ran squints his eyes, “fuck you, you’re lucky I even let you. Don’t get too cocky just cuz’ you took her back-door virginity.” He smirks. 

“I’m already cocky, y’know that already.” Rindou says with a coy smile. 

“Shut up, Rindou.” Ran scoffs, but still smiling slightly. “You know I’m right.”

You smile at their antics, you’ve always loved watching the obvious brotherly bond they have through their playful jabs. Rindou shrugs, “whatever, I’m still takin’ the dub’.” He says with a smirk. 

Ran chuckles, “yeah, the dub I let you have.”

Rindou gives his brother a mock pout, “fine. Just let me bask in the glory for a few minutes, will you?” 

Ran rolls his eyes. “Sure. Just don't let it get to your head.” 

You can’t help but laugh, causing both of the Haitani’s to turn their attention back on you. “Awe, we made her laugh.” Rindou smiles.

“Stop, you're not funny.” Ran says to him.

“I beg to differ.” Rindou retorts.

“Whatever you say, Rindou.” Ran says as he stretches his arms above his head, then resumes cuddling into your side. They both have their heads rested against each of your shoulder’s as they lay comfortably against you. You let out a content sigh before you kiss the back of their heads. Ran and Rindou both let out a little content moan, nuzzling into you further. 

“I’m really glad I moved in.” You smile. “I’m really glad as well, baby girl.” Ran replies, looking at you from your shoulder, his braids resting on your bare chest. Rindou leans in and kisses your cheek before speaking in a soft voice, “me too.”

[justmeinadaze]

Take It Out On Me Part 26 (Steddie X Plus Size Reader)

A/N: My angsty brain has once again entered the chat. Please enjoy the drama and the feels!

Warnings: Sir Eddie/Daddy Steve and Sub Plus size Fem Reader, no SMUT in this one. FLUFF, they found out about the bun in the oven, ANGST, Y/N makes a few terrible decisions (i.e she panics) and her and the guys get into a fight, mentions of pregnancy pains, mentions of a lot of worries when it comes to being a parent as well as their fears of telling her parents or Steve's parents finding out.

Word Count: 3977

Series here

###################

Prepared this time, Masie opens her front door as soon as a fist pounds loudly against the wood. 

“Steven. Edward. How may I—”

“Where is she?”, Eddie growls, lightly moving your best friend out of the way as he begins searching her apartment. “Y/N?!”

“She’s not here. I told her she needed to talk to you both but—”

“But what? You know something, Maze. I know it. She wouldn’t just disappear without coming to you first or having you help her.”, Steve interrupts. 

“I don’t know where she is.”

“Liar.” Glaring at the metalhead, she sighs as she folds her arms over her chest. “Fine. You don’t know where she is but you know SOMETHING. What do you know?”

“I can’t tell you.”

“Bullshit. She’s been gone for 24hrs, no one has seen her EXCEPT you, I imagine. If you don’t tell me now, Masie, I’m going to go to Hopper and he can get the truth out of you.”

You best friend chuckles under her breath as she steps forward and starts pushing them out her door. 

“I’m not afraid of Hopper, gentlemen. Feel free to send him my way.”

Eddie plants his heels as his sad, worried eyes take one last look around her apartment. 

“Masie…please. This isn’t like her. Whatever’s going on, it has to be hurting her if she’s hiding. We just want to make sure she’s ok.”

A heavy exhale leaves her as she scans them both over. 

“She came by here yesterday afternoon and we talked. I gave her my advice, she panicked, and left. She said she was about to lose everything…you, her career, her parents… I imagine wherever she is it’s somewhere she can think but where she feels safe.”

A thought hits them both at the same time as they thank her and run to their car.

***

Your feet dangle over the side of desk in Mr. C’s classroom as your eyes scan over the memories. 

This is where it all started. 

Where they initiated the conversation with you during detention and where they fucked you for the first time a few days later. Where you had your first kiss with them and where you first realized they may not be the assholes you thought they were. This is where they fought for you when kids called you a whore and where you first saw them when you came back from New York realizing they missed you like crazy. 

You could still feel their energy in here, Steve’s heavy agitation and Eddie’s cocky sarcasm. 

“I told you, man. You need to stay away from those good girls. Speaking of…what are you in for, sweetheart?...I asked you something, princess. Don’t be rude now.”

“She can definitely speak. Talked back to Carol today. It was amazing.”

“You, young lady, are in serious trouble.” You jump at the sound of Steve’s voice as he and Eddie saunter into the classroom. “We have been looking everywhere for you.”

You didn’t say a word as you watch them maneuver in front of you as they visually take you in making sure you’re alright. When you don’t move or speak, the metalhead folds his arms across his chest and leans against one of the desks across from you. 

“You promised me you wouldn���t disappear. In our ‘vows’… you said I’d never have to worry about you disappearing or casting us aside… or was that all just bullshit?” Huffing loudly through his nose, he glances at Steve as he shrugs. “You take over, bud, because I’m at a loss. I didn’t think we had to worry about this anymore but I guess I was wrong. I guess now I have to concerned about you making a snap decision to abandon us.”

Every word he was saying was cutting into you like knife but you held it together as best you could as you tried to avoid their intense gazes. 

“What do you feel like you’re burdening us with, honey? That’s the only reason you pull stuff like this. Was it the honeymoon and reception YOU planned? The five years of love and respect we’ve shown each other? The house we worked hard to buy you because we deserve to have a nice place together to grow old in?”

A tear escaped your eye and you hastily wiped it away. 

“Spare me, princess. They’re all the same, Harrington. You’re just like my mother, Y/N. I don’t know why you put so much effort into this relationship if you were just going to do this.”

“Eddie…”

“NO! Fuck you! Little miss fucking Martyr here always thinks she’s doing us a favor when she pulls this shit but it just fucking hurts!”, the metalhead shouts as he throws something off one of the desks into the wall, startling you with its loud bang. “You’d figure after all this time she’d learn how to talk to us instead of thinking THIS is the best course of action.”

“You know,”, you whimper as tears begin to fall again. “I always love when you get angry like you just did. It really gives me insight into how you see us and this relationship.”

Both men narrow their eyes in your direction as you mimic Eddie’s words from senior year with a slight sarcastic tone. 

“I was gone for a day. Not fucking…11 years. I’m allowed to get away.”

“Is that what you were doing, little girl? ‘Getting away’?”, Steve replied in an equally sassy demeanor. “Is that why you didn’t even give us the courtesy to at least fucking tell us where you were or how long you’d be gone?”

“I needed some time alone.”

“Is that why you ran to Masie first? Keep lying, Y/N. May as well.”, Eddie growls.

“She said she advised you to talk to us. Talk to us about what?” You remained silent as you slid off the desk and headed for the door but Steve promptly blocked your path.

“Vanilla.”

“The fact that you think we’re playing right now says a lot, babe. No, we’re full-on fighting. YOU disappeared for hours, no note or phone call, no one knew where you were or if you were even alright.”, he scolded as he stepped closer to you. “That is not what we do in ANY aspect of our relationship. Now, what aren’t you telling us?”

“I can’t.”, you whisper.

“Why?”, Eddie asks as he comes up on your side.

“I’m scared.”

“Of us? Of someone else? Is someone else hurting you or threatening you?” Steve tone fluctuates from angry to worried as he throws his questions in your direction. 

“No.”

“Then what are you afraid of? Of us leaving you?”

Your eyes divert again as they both stand up straighter.

“What happened? Why would you think we would leave?”

“I can’t…”

“Did you do something?”

“Did you fuck someone? Are you in love with someone else?”

“No…I…”

You felt yourself start to get overwhelmed as they hurled questions at you back and forth causing you to fold into yourself as you tried to shut them out.

“What happened, Y/N?”

“What’s going on?”

“We need to know.”

“We need to know if these last 5 years was a waste of time.”

“I’M PREGNANT!”, you scream as you cover your ears and close your eyes. “I’m fucking pregnant!”

It feels as if all the energy has left the room as it falls into complete silence. Braving the fallout, you drop your hands and slowly open your eyes to meet their shocked, stoic features. 

“I’m pregnant.”, you repeat as your eyes searched theirs for anything. Any spark of emotion that would calm you and your nerves. 

Your heart shattered when you found nothing.

Sobbing, you push your body between theirs and power walk down the hallway as you head for your car. You barely register the sound of sneakers that come up from behind you before a ringed hand grabbed your shoulder and turned you into a strong embrace. 

Feebly, your own hands tried to shove at his chest but Eddie just keeps stepping forward till your arms finally wrapped around him and he held your head to his chest. Incased in sudden warmth, you felt Steve circle his arms around your waist as he rested his head on his friend’s shoulder. 

#################

The three of you sat at your dining room table not saying a word as you stared at the wood in front of you. 

“Have, um, have you been to a doctor to have one of those…uh…”, Eddie taps his fingers against the furniture as he tries to remember the word he’s looking for. “Uh…ultrasound things…”

Silently, you shake your head as you wipe another tear from your cheek. 

“Ok, we can, um, call your doctor and…” Steve paused when he watched your eyes close as you heavily exhale and lean back in your chair. “Y/N, honey, we’re trying here.”

“I don’t want you to try.”

“What does that even mean?”

“It means what it means, Eddie. You don’t HAVE to do anything. You-you can go on and live your lives. This is my fault. I fucked up.”

“Why do you say that so confidently? We don’t even know exactly what happened. You’re always diligent with your pills.”

“And last I checked, Y/N, it takes two to make a baby unless you climbed onto yourself and got yourself pregnant.”

“Or I cheated on you right?” Both men sigh as they try to control their anger. “I’m kind of surprised that even came up in your assessment of things I could be hiding.”

“What are we supposed to think when you’re being so fucking secretive?”, Steve growls as he leans towards you, folding his arms. “It’s not fair for you to hold that against us.”

“It’s also not fair for you to push us out and handle all this alone. I fucking hate that we’re back here, sweetheart. You playing the slut victim for us to be ‘happy’ or some shit. Do you honestly think we wouldn’t be there for you or that kid?”

Silencing yourself again, you shut them out as you pout. 

“You know what? I’m not playing this fucking game again, Y/N. Do you want us to leave? Yes or no? No matter what we’re going to help you with this because it’s not solely your responsibility and that’s our son or daughter in there but you decide, babe. Are we doing this together or separate?”, Steve inquires in a firm tone that frightens you slightly. 

When you don’t answer, he angrily pushes back his chair and stomps towards the bedroom. Eddie shakes his head before following suit and you listen as they bang around with Steve muttering under his breath as he packs.

You slowly head their way, leaning against the door frame as you watched a sight you thought you would never see. 

“We’ll still pay for the mortgage because you and that baby will need some place safe to be.”

“We’ll come with you to doctor’s appointments and then…”, Eddie’s voice cracks as he looks away. “I can’t do this, Steve. I’m not the same asshole I was. Can you…”, he gestures towards you as his friend nods.

“Then we can come up with a visitation and child support thing. We won’t need to go to court or anything. You know we’d give you anything you two need.” 

Stepping further into the room, you reach for his arm and he angerly yanks it away. 

“Don’t touch me, Y/N.”, he snarls in that same voice that kills you. “Is this better? Pushing us away like this? Hurting us?! Obviously you’re still the same meek little girl we met junior year. I suggest growing up before that baby comes.”

“Steve…Eddie…please…”, you cry.

A sharp pain abruptly shoots through you as you wrap your arms around your stomach. 

“Steve.”, the metalhead says with concern when he notices your sudden change in body language.

The other boy’s head turns as they both step closer and he cups your cheek.

“Y/N. What’s going on, baby?”

“Somethings…something’s wrong…”

***

Both men hold each of your hands as your heavy eyes watch the monitor beep next you as you lay in the hospital bed waiting for the doctor to return. 

“Hello there Miss…Y/L/N. Are one of you the father?” a physician smiled as he sauntered in with his nose buried in your chart. 

“We both are.”, Steve announced without any hesitation as the metalhead nodded. “Is she alright? What happened?”

“Oh, uh, yes both mother and baby are alright. It seems here just a lot of stress upsetting the little one. Not uncommon in young mothers especially younger overweight ones.”

Eddie’s head tilted angerly as they both glared at the unlucky man before them. 

“Was her weight a factor in what happened?”

“Um, no, but—”

“Ok, then why the fuck does it matter? You said it was her stress which has nothing to do with her size.”, Steve countered as he folded his arms. “Do you think mentioning it though will make her feel better?”

“Look, plus size women tend to have a difficult time during pregnancy and—”

“Great. We’ll take that up with HER doctor than. Until she gets here, you can get the fuck out of our sight.”

As soon as he leaves, their demeanors soften again as they focus on you. As you began to cry, Eddie sits on your bed by your feet caressing your leg as he tries to comfort you. 

 “Y/N, baby, everything’s ok.”

“I’m so sorry. Masie was right and so were you guys. You’ve changed so much for me and grown… I’m still terrified of ruining that for you. I know we didn’t plan for this but… you two still deserve to follow your dreams.”

“Princess, what are you talking about?”

“I-I-I know you want to be a musician and Steve wants to help so many people with his thing with-with Robin.”, you hiccup as Steve cups your cheek and dries your tears with his thumb as they fall. “I know… I’m going to have to put teaching on hold…for a bit t-to have the baby. I just—”

“Honey, look at me. I need you to breathe for me, alright? There you go, baby girl. In and out. Good. Good girl.”, Steve praises as you do what he asks. “Y/N, Eddie and I have had so many dreams, so many things we want to do and experience. But do you know what our number one dream is?”

“You.”, Eddie answers when you shake your head. “You, angel, and to experience everything in the world with you including a family.”

“I mean…we may be jumping ahead a few steps here but when have we ever been normal?”

“Now, baby, that doesn’t mean we want to push you. If you feel like… you want to…take other steps…you know… That’s ok to. No matter what we’ll be here for you. 

Releasing their hands, you place your palm on your stomach as you glance towards the machine keeping track of the baby’s progress inside of you. 

“I want to keep him. I love him so much already.”

Steve grins softly as he places his palm over yours. 

“He?”

“Just a feeling.”, you shrug. “I’m so sorry. I thought…I didn’t mean to…I was just trying to help.”

“By throwing yourself under the bus? Sweetheart, when have we ever made you feel like you can’t talk to us or that you would have to carry anything alone?”

“So…we’re doing this? We’re having a baby?”

Their gaze shift towards each other before a huge smile stretches across their faces. 

“A little dude I get to play D & D with? Fuck yeah, I’m here for it.”

“Oh my god. Eddie’s going to turn our kid into a nerd. 2 out of the 3 of his parents were basketball stars!”

“Ok, Harrington, and they can’t be a jock and a dork?! Princess here is both so I could argue the same thing. 2 out of 3 of his parents are freaks.”

“3 out of 3.”, Steve jokes as he winks at you.

###############

“Hey, Y/N.”

“Hey Dr. Dixon.”, you greet as your personal OBGYN enters your hospital room. 

“What happened? I see you had some stress that caused little one here to throw a tantrum? Preparing mommy, I guess.”, she jokes as she moves around the room with her cart grabbing some extra supplies. 

“Speaking of, we were kind of wondering, if you knew how this happened? Y/N’s usually on top of her pills.”, Steve asks as he pets your head before moving to give the doctor some room. 

“So, of course, with birth control there’s always that 1% chance and I know you three just went on vacation recently.”, she laughs. “That being said… before you guys left I remember we had a mix up with her prescription. I remember also telling the nurse to tell you to wait a bit before any activity.”

“A week. Yeah, we waited. It was awful.”, Eddie sighs as his friend pushes his arm. “What?! It’s true.”

“A week? No, two weeks. Cheese and rice.”, she growls as she glides the wand over your lower belly. “Before you leave today, Y/N, tell me who you spoke to.” The three of you waited as your eyes remain on the screen above your head. “Aaaaand there they are… seems to be baking in there quite nicely. See? Nothing to worry about, mama.”

“That’s them?”, Steve asks as he points towards the little blob. 

“Oh yeah. You see the head and we got some little arms here. Oh! You have a little wigglier here. Not much but…”, she grins. “Want to hear something cool?”

After pushing a few buttons on her machine, a fast rhythmic sound fills the room.

“Their heartbeat is normal to.”

Eddie smiles as he leans in closer to device.

“Metal.”

###############

Sitting on your bed, you tap your pen against your cheek as you concentrate on the notepad in front of you. 

“Hey!”, you yelp when it’s suddenly yanked from your grasp and both boys jump in beside you. 

“Stop thinking so hard. You’re supposed to be resting.”

“Things we need for baby.”, Steve reads, glancing at you. “Y/N, don’t worry, baby girl. We have plenty of time and we’ll figure this out, ok? Like Munson said, you’re supposed to be relaxing and taking it easy.”

“I know but it’s just how my brain sorts through things.”

“Oh? So where is the list that says, ‘Reasons I should hide from Daddy and Master instead of telling them what’s going on?”, Eddie remarked sassily as he dramatically flipped through your papers.

“You see… I didn’t get to make that list or any other so…”

“Mhmm.”, he grins as he kisses your forehead before tossing the notebook on the bedside table.

“Eddie? I really am sorry. I, um, you don’t have to worry about me disappearing…I mean leaving…I…”

Both men exhale as the metalhead pulls you to his side, pressing your face into his chest. 

“It’s ok—”

“No, baby, it’s not! It’s not. I don’t know why I do that. Why I…push you guys away and hurt you like I did.”

“Your parents kicked you out when you did something they didn’t like.” You two turn to look at Steve as his gaze remains forward towards the floor. “Like you said at the time, you weren’t running around with all of Hawkins. You just loved two people.” His beautiful eyes shift to meet yours as he softly smiles. “Not that there’s anything wrong with that either but… the point I’m trying to make is…you felt like a burden before we even met you. Were they always like that?”

“Masie said your parents were strict.”, Eddie added.

“Did you both know I never wanted to play basketball?” You smile as their eyes widen playfully. “I always wanted to be in the book clubs but my dad said a sport would look better on an application. Don’t get me wrong, I loved basketball. I have so many good memories with those girls but…I really loved to read and write. My mom at the time said since I was about to start high school, I needed to get my head out of the clouds.”

“Anytime, I would express an interest in something they would counter it with something else. It made me feel like…everything I liked or wanted…was wrong. If I pushed in anyway it seemed to upset them so…”

“You just kind of quietly coasted through school.”, Steve finishes. “The few times you did stand up, the results were intense to say the least.”

“And not just with your parents but your exes to.”

“Which explains why you run and hide. Not just to ‘protect’ us but you as well.”

“Steve…I’m so sorry to. I’ll do whatever I can to make up for hurting you both. I-I-I…”

The man’s lips cut you off as they connected with your own while two set of hands guide you back against the pillows. 

“One step at a time, honey. First thing’s first; you need to rest.”

As you feel Eddie’s palm run along your tummy, you turn to face him right as his lips place a tender kiss on yours. 

“So, we’re definitely going with a heavy metal theme for the baby’s room, right? Dio, Metallica, and all those posters everywhere with like an Evil Dead banner above the bed.”

“Oh my God, Munson, no. It should be nice, cute baby things right?”

“Define nice and cute, Harrington.”

“I don’t fucking know. Just like…the pinks and blues…and cute little animals…”

“Masie’s good with planning and decorating. Maybe we can ask her.”

“Sounds like a plan, babe. Wayne is good at building stuff. Maybe, he can build some of the things we need.”

Curling up in Eddie’s side with Steve’s arms around your waist, you fall asleep to the pleasant sound of them discussing things involving the new little bundle of joy. 

“Honey?” The metalhead glances over your sleeping frame quickly before nodding to confirm that you were asleep. “How are you feeling, man?”

“Nervous more than anything. Right now, I’m more concerned about her and her health. Look what happened when she was stressing about telling us. What’s going to happen when she tells her parents? Mr. C?”

“I think with us, it was seeing us pack and getting ready to leave.”

“Ok, yeah that was a reaction to her hiding things but, Steve, can we guarantee her parents won’t have that reaction to her just saying she’s pregnant? Last time she dropped big news on them I got smacked and you both were thrown out of your house. Jesus, and what’s going to happen when your dad finds out? Is he going to run around Hawkins again calling her a whore?”

“I can handle my dad. You know Mr. C is more than understanding and can take care of her when it comes to her classes. Her parents… I don’t know. Hopefully after everything that’s happened…this time will be different.”

“What about you? How are you feeling?”, Eddie asks.

Steve’s eyes meet his friend’s before focusing down on you. 

“I’m still scared of being a father but I know we can do this.”

“Yeah, same, dude. We can give them a good life and be happy. Uh, Steve. Do you think we’ll still be able to keep this dynamic? It’s not like she can call me Master in front of toddler and we can’t do some of the other things we do—”

“Ed, relax.”, Steve chuckles. “We’ll figure this out. I’m sure couples and parents do it all the time. We’ll, um, add it to our list of things to talk about. Come on, bud. Sleep now and then tomorrow the three of us will start making plans.”

#############

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[logansargeantsbabymom]

Love Doesn’t Have To Hurt

BREIF Logan Sargeant x Fem!Sainz!Reader, Lando Norris x Fem!Sainz!Reader, Carlos Sainz x Fem!Sainz!Reader

A/N: I’ve really been trying my best with keeping up with writing and posting within a timely manner but it hurts me that someone (not naming names) took my first ever post and copied and pasted it as their own, I mean I’m flattered that you love my writing so much you posted it to your own account but please, that was disrespectful. To everyone who has reported or shared that post and helped me by sending me kind words and how to prevent things like this from happening again, thank you so much! I don’t know yet whether or not Im going to be annoying and take ANOTHER short break but this is messing with me a little. Enjoy this story though, I’ve had it in my drafts for a week or two.

Follow my instagram account (THATS STRICTLY FOR THIS BLOG) for updates on when i post and fun stuff like that!

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F1 Masterlist

Y/N Sainz had always been close to her older brother, Carlos. Growing up in the shadow of his racing career had its perks, but it also meant she was constantly surrounded by his friends, including Lando Norris. From the moment they met, Y/N and Lando had an easy rapport, their banter light and effortless.

Lando quickly became a fixture in her life, always around for family dinners, race weekends, and impromptu hangouts. Their friendship was easy, natural, and uncomplicated—or so it seemed. For years, Y/N harbored a secret crush on Lando, carefully hidden behind the mask of friendship. She never acted on it, fearing it would ruin not only their friendship but also complicate things with Carlos.

Y/N had been dating Logan Sargeant for two years, a relationship that seemed perfect on the outside. Logan was charming and attentive, and they appeared to be the ideal couple. But behind closed doors, cracks began to form. Logan's attention waned, and Y/N found herself increasingly lonely and insecure.

The final blow came when she discovered Logan had been cheating on her. The betrayal shattered her, leaving her heartbroken and wary of trusting anyone again. Carlos was livid, ready to confront Logan, but Y/N begged him not to. She wanted to heal on her own terms, away from the drama and conflict.

Lando was there for her during those dark days, offering a shoulder to cry on and a listening ear. He had always admired Y/N's strength and resilience, but seeing her so vulnerable only deepened his feelings for her. Yet, he kept his distance, knowing she needed time to recover.

It was during a summer vacation in Monaco when things began to change. Carlos had invited a few friends to join them at their family's villa, and Lando was, of course, among them. The days were filled with laughter, swimming, and late-night conversations under the stars.

One evening, after a particularly exhilarating race, the group decided to celebrate at a local club. The atmosphere was electric, and the drinks were flowing. Y/N found herself sitting next to Lando, their knees brushing as they talked.

"You were amazing today," Y/N said, her voice sincere. "I don't think I've ever seen you drive like that."

Lando smiled, a warm, genuine smile that made her heart flutter. "Thanks, Y/N. It means a lot coming from you."

Their eyes met, and for a moment, the world around them faded. There was a spark, an undeniable connection that neither of them could ignore. But just as quickly, Y/N looked away, the reality of her recent heartbreak crashing down on her. She couldn't risk opening herself up again, not after Logan.

Despite their unspoken feelings, Y/N and Lando tried to maintain the status quo. But the spark between them was impossible to ignore, and one evening, after everyone else had gone to bed, they found themselves alone in the villa's garden.

"Lando, we need to talk," Y/N said, her voice barely above a whisper. "I can't keep pretending that nothing's changed."

Lando nodded, his expression serious. "I know. I feel it too, Y/N. But what are we supposed to do? Carlos will kill me if he finds out."

Y/N sighed, her heart aching with the weight of their predicament. "I don't know. But I can't keep hiding how I feel."

Lando took a deep breath, reaching out to take her hand. "We'll figure it out. Together."

From that night on, they began a secret relationship, stolen moments and whispered confessions. It wasn't easy, especially for Y/N, who struggled with trust and vulnerability after Logan's betrayal. But Lando was patient, showing her that love didn't have to hurt, that it could be gentle and kind.

Keeping their relationship a secret was more challenging than either of them had anticipated. There were close calls, moments when they almost slipped up. Like the time Carlos nearly walked in on them kissing in Lando's hotel room. Or the time Y/N accidentally sent Lando a flirty text meant for her eyes only, which he opened in front of Carlos.

Each close call only heightened the tension, but it also made their bond stronger. They became experts at hiding their feelings in public, but when they were alone, the intensity of their love was palpable.

The constant secrecy began to take its toll on Y/N. She hated lying to Carlos, and the stress of keeping their relationship hidden was wearing her down. One evening, after a particularly close call, she and Lando found themselves arguing in hushed tones in his hotel room.

"I can't keep doing this, Lando," Y/N said, tears in her eyes. "It's tearing me apart."

Lando's heart ached at the sight of her tears. "I know, Y/N. I hate this too. But what choice do we have? If we tell Carlos, he'll never forgive us."

Y/N shook her head, her voice breaking. "I can't keep lying to him. He deserves to know the truth. And if he can't accept it, then at least we tried."

Lando took a deep breath, knowing she was right. "Okay. We'll tell him. Together."

The opportunity to come clean presented itself sooner than they expected. It was the night before a big race, and Carlos had invited Lando and Y/N to dinner. The atmosphere was tense, the weight of their secret hanging over them.

As they sat down to eat, Y/N took a deep breath, steeling herself for what was to come. "Carlos, there's something we need to tell you."

Carlos looked up, his brow furrowing in confusion. "What is it, Y/N?"

Y/N glanced at Lando, who nodded encouragingly. "Lando and I... we're together. We've been seeing each other for a while now."

The silence that followed was deafening. Carlos's expression hardened, his jaw clenching. "Is this some kind of joke?"

"No, it's not," Lando said, his voice steady. "We didn't mean for it to happen, but it did. And we love each other."

Carlos stood up, his chair scraping loudly against the floor. "You lied to me. Both of you. How could you do this?”

Y/N felt tears welling up in her eyes. "Carlos, please understand. We didn't want to hurt you."

Carlos shook his head, his eyes filled with betrayal. "I need some time to think."

The days that followed were painful and tense. Carlos avoided both Y/N and Lando, throwing himself into his work and the upcoming race. Y/N felt the weight of his disappointment and anger, but she knew they had done the right thing by being honest.

Lando was a constant source of support, holding her when she cried and reassuring her that they would get through this together. It wasn't easy, but their love was strong, and they were determined to weather the storm.

Lando knew that words alone wouldn't be enough to mend the rift between him and Carlos. He needed to show Carlos that his feelings for Y/N were genuine and deep. During the next race weekend, Lando approached Carlos with a plan.

"Carlos, I know you're still upset, and you have every right to be," Lando began, his voice sincere. "But I want to prove to you that my feelings for Y/N are real and that I'll do anything to make her happy. Let me help you with your race prep this weekend, and maybe you'll see that I'm serious about this."

Carlos studied Lando for a moment, then gave a curt nod. "Fine. Let's see if you're as serious as you say."

The weekend was grueling, with Lando juggling his own race preparations and assisting Carlos. But he threw himself into the work, showing not only his dedication to his own career but also his commitment to earning Carlos's trust.

After the race, which went spectacularly well for both Carlos and Lando, Carlos finally sat down with his sister. They were in her hotel room, the evening light casting long shadows on the walls.

"Y/N, I need to understand," Carlos said, his voice soft but intense. "Why Lando? After everything that happened with Logan, why take that risk again?"

Y/N took a deep breath, her eyes meeting Carlos's. "Because Lando showed me that love doesn't have to hurt, Carlos. He was there for me when Logan broke my heart. He was patient, kind, and he never pushed me. He loves me in a way that I never thought was possible."

Carlos's expression softened as he listened. "I just don't want you to get hurt again, Y/N. You're my little sister, and I want to protect you."

Y/N reached out and took Carlos's hand. "I know, and I love you for that. But Lando makes me happy. I need you to trust me, and to trust him."

Carlos sighed, running a hand through his hair. "Okay. I'll try. But if he ever hurts you, he's going to have to answer to me."

Y/N smiled, relief flooding through her. "Thank you, Carlos. That means the world to me."

With Carlos's reluctant blessing, Y/N and Lando were finally able to be open about their relationship. The burden of secrecy lifted, they found a new sense of freedom and joy. Their love grew stronger, and they faced the challenges of their relationship together, knowing they had Carlos's support.

In time, the tension between Carlos and Lando eased, and they found their way back to the friendship they had always cherished. Y/N was grateful for the understanding and forgiveness her brother had shown, and she knew that no matter what, they would always be a family.

Lando proved to be the perfect partner for Y/N, supporting her dreams and ambitions while pursuing his own. They became each other's rock, facing the ups and downs of life in the fast lane together.

One evening, as the sun set over the Monaco coastline, the Sainz family and Lando gathered for a dinner. It was a special occasion, one that marked not only the success of Carlos's season but also the strength and unity of their family.

During dinner, Carlos raised his glass, his eyes shining with pride and affection. "To family, and to the people who make us better. Y/N, Lando, I'm proud of you both. You've shown me that love can be strong, even when it's tested. Here's to the future."

Y/N and Lando exchanged a smile, their hearts full. They clinked glasses, surrounded by the warmth and love of their family.

As the seasons changed and the years passed, Y/N and Lando's relationship continued to flourish. They faced new challenges and adventures together, their bond growing stronger with each passing day. Carlos remained a constant presence in their lives, supporting them and cheering them on.

—

I have no clue what the hell this is but I hope you enjoyed?

Taglist:

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[czrpenters]

piercings | tara carpenter x reader

summary: you could be a little extra when it came to pleasing your girlfriend.

pairings: tara carpenter x fem!reader.

warnings: no scream vi spoilers, mention of needles and piercings. also, english is not my first language.

word count: 985 words.

masterlist. | request rules.

It wasn't fully your idea to get your nipples pierced after all. You saw Tara blushing while looking at some pretty suggestive pictures on her Tumblr the other day, and instead of being jealous like you usually would, you started wondering; is she really into that stuff at all?

The next day, you got an appointment at Woodsboro's local tattoo parlor. And oh god, it was more painful than to watch a dog die in an early 2000's movie. You literally felt your soul leave your body for some minutes, your skin had visible goosebumps all over it and the pain was bearing the unbearable. But damn, you looked hot. And you knew that Tara would love that.

She mentioned once or twice, as well. "Babe, would you think I'd look hot with my nipples pierced?". And you knew damn well that this was never going to happen due to her fear of needles, but a girl can dream, right? And Tara was about to have her dream come true that night.

--

"Baby, I'm home! Got us some chinese!" Tara shouted while entering your house, with some takeout in her hands. It was your usual friday night; your dad was a surgeon so he had to bear inhumane 48 hour-shifts on the weekends, which of course meant that you guys had the whole place to yourselves. You usually didn't do anything that crazy or teenage-like, you and Tara were really responsible for your age. The days were mostly spent by watching some movies, eating a bunch of junk food and a lot of sex. Nothing that a lesbian couple wouldn't do.

"I'm over here!" You shouted back in your bedroom, turning off your phone and waiting for your girl to come to you. Your chest was still a little bit sore, so laying on it was definetly not an option right now. Also, no bras for at least a whole week, but that was something you weren't really worried about. You wanted to show them off. You wanted her to see it.

Tara left all the bags filled with food on the kitchen counter, discarding her jacket and shoes before coming up the stairs to your bedroom. She was exceptionally tired today, to say the very least. Playing soccer was definitely not the best career choice and yet she still played it. Not for the sport itself, but the thrill to win. She was exhausted, so it was no surprise that she decided to fall on your bed like a dead corpse, without even looking straight at you. "M' tired as fuck."

She mumbled, in the cutest fucking way possible, which made you laugh. "I know, baby. You didn't have to bring us food, y'know? We could just order Postmates or something." You kissed her forehead, laying down with her but without hugging, you couldn't even dream of having your chest touch something other than the thin layer of fabric of your tank top.

"But it's our tradition, babe... I don't wanna be the one to break it." You almost didn't hear her muffled sore voice, and it made your heart flutter. She couldn't be real. "Why you're not hugging me?"

You knew that it wouldn't take long for her to notice that something was missing. She wasn't sure what, but she knew you better than that; she knew that the first thing you'd do was hug and kiss her right after practice, like always. But you didn't. She finally looked up with a puzzled look on her face. "Is there something wrong?"

"No baby, nothing is wrong... " You kissed her lips briefly, trying to reassure her that everything was fine. More than fine, actually. "It's just... I got a little surprise for you, that's all."

"Baaaaabe! You know that I hate and love surprises." She whined, jumping on the spot and sitting down while looking at you. Thankfully you were wearing a thin sweatshirt over your tank top, so she couldn't see what it was just yet. "Come on, tell me what it is."

"I will, I promise! Just... Close your eyes first, okay?" Before she could even start her sentence, you shushed her. Reluctantly, she closed her eyes, but you were directly looking at them to make sure she wouldn't peek. Carefully, you took your sweatshirt off, alongside with your white tank top. Your nipples were a little puffy still, more red than the usual. It felt like if Tara sucked the life out of them for at least a couple of hours, but instead of her usual bite marks, there was a silver jewelry on them.

You were so fucking excited and it took every inch of your soul to not blurb and tell her what it was before she could even see them. "Okay baby, open them now."

She did as she was told, and you swear to god that you saw some sparkles emerge from her eyes. You could almost feel her happiness, as if her mouth was watering like a boy seeing a pair of boobs for the first time. "You've got to be fucking kidding me."

"Got them while you were at practice. Aren't they pretty?" They were two pieces of silver jewlery, the colour matching the necklace she got you with her initials on it. And oh boy, she was so turned on at that moment that she couldn't even form a sentence. "Didn't liked them?"

That was a rethorical question. You knew she loved them. And the fact that you had to wait at least 2 weeks for her to touch them was, to say the least, torturous. But before you could manage to think about anything else, you felt her lips against yours in a fervorous kiss. Her mouth tasted like cherry, and her kiss tasted like heaven. A piece of your own private paradise. "You really don't know the things I wanna do to you right now, (Y/N)."

"Show me then."

⠀

[bts-hyperfixation]

Outside of the Fox

Chapter 38 of????

2634 words

Y/N longs for a new life when the one she’d been living comes to an abrupt stop. Without much thought to those she is leaving behind, the little fox packs a backpack and disappears. She stumbles across the shelter and makes an interim home for herself while she works out exactly what she wants from her second chance.

Last

You wake up to the same squeezing feeling settled around your chest, although that could also be the weight of Jungkook's arms as the bunny holds you tightly even in his sleep. 

All things considered, you had slept quite soundly, you just wish someone had told your body that as it tries to tell you how exhausted you are. 

You do your best to worm your way out of the youngest's embrace, disturbing him only slightly before he turns around and gathers Jimin into his arms instead. You take one more look at their sleeping forms before tip-toeing out of the room. No one is sitting in the living room making your escape easier as you slip silently through to the front door. 

You aren't really sure where you are going, you just know one more minute in the house is going to make you combust. So you walk for a while, you pass your old office, pass the restaurant you went to the day you met  Jimin, pass Hobi's karaoke shop. You continue going until nothing around you is familiar and then your stomach starts to growl. 

You walk into the first cafe you see and sit yourself in a booth at the back, taking a deep breath as you finally take stock of the position you are now in. The cafe is mostly empty with one other customer in the far corner and two waitresses who look more than a little annoyed that you have invaded their space. The elder of the two hands you a menu and waits to take your order. You barely take any notice, pointing to the first thing under the breakfast title. 

With nothing left to distract you from the fear, it starts creeping back in; A remnant phobia from the hybrid genes mixed with your sheltered childhood. An instinct that tells you to disappear before you're trapped again. 

Your mind runs through the previous day countless times. How ready you had been to fight for Taehyung and his freedom, only for his solution to be to trap you with him. The logical section of your brain tries to remind you that he is not trying to collect or ensnare you, that this may be his best shot to stay with you and the other members of your relationship. 

The emotional side of you however can't quite get over how much your new life has come to resemble your previous one. Living in someone else's home, no career to call your own, and now a convenient trophy on the arm of another rich man... 

A stack of pancakes is placed in front of your face bringing you out of your miserable monologue but instead of finding the aging waitress, you find Noelle beaming down at you.

"Y/N! Long time no see," She smiles.

The mouse hybrid invites herself to sit with you, sliding into the booth opposite.

"Although it feels like I'm all caught up with the amount Jimin talks about you at the shelter," 

She reaches out and takes a berry from the side of your plate. You do your best to smile in return at her, before today you may have actually been thrilled to see Noelle since she was right, it had been a long time. But right now didn't feel like a socialising time.

"Perhaps I'm not all caught up judging by that sour look in your eye... Maybe a new set of ears can help?" She offers.

"I don't know. It's a lot, I'm not sure I fully understand my issues, I wouldn't want to burden you,"

"You're my friend Y/N, you could never be a burden to me. And if you're not at home talking this out with the seven wonderful men that dote on your every whim, then I think you need the outside ear... Am I wrong?" 

Noelle takes your hand from the table and holds it in her own, doing her best to reassure you. 

You ponder it for a moment, but she is right an outside opinion might help your brain to rationalise, although perhaps you should think about booking your own session with Dr. Triever instead...

Still, you relay the entire situation starting from your 16th birthday all the way up to today. And she listens to you patiently, not interrupting once even when you stray from the main subject on to distracting details, although she does steal a few bites of your breakfast. 

"And so I've landed at the point where I know I have to marry Tae, and I love him so that's okay! I'm just having a lot of trouble getting my instincts to retreat. My hackles raise every time I think about it, and honestly it's making my back start to ache."

"Have you considered not saying yes to marrying Tae?" Noelle suggests.

"Of course not. If I don't marry him then he and that poor girl are going to be forced together. I know what that's like and I won't let it happen to someone I love." 

"No, you'll just let it happen to you a second time," She rolls her eyes. "Okay, let's start with an easier part of the equation. Jimin said you had put a lot of the funds behind the new renovations, doesn't that make it your house, not just theirs anymore?"

"I mean, I guess? But it's not what I had in mind. My name isn't on any of the paperwork for the land, and I really did think I was going to live all on my own in the world."

"Living on your own is not all it's cracked up to be, trust me. I'd give anything for a cuddle some nights, especially during storms," She shudders dramatically. "And you gave up your job yourself, but I'm 100% sure we could get you another one if that is an issue, but I think your brain is just searching for reasons to run. Really think about it, how much do you mind not working?"

You do think about it. And maybe spending your time in the house was far more satisfying than going to your nine to five. But it's still the principle of the matter. You had promised yourself that you were going to do it on your own. Now you've failed.

And that's really the crux of it. Not that you're living with the boys, not that you've dipped into your money, not that you find yourself suddenly betrothed. It's the fact that you have perceived yourself as failing. Unable to prove that you could take care of yourself in the big bad world that your parents worked so hard to protect you from. 

You let Noelle in on your thoughts as she finishes off your breakfast for you.

"The way I see it, you haven't failed yourself. You've just found something more suitable instead. But if your stomach is still in knots about it, it's better to run now than on the day of the wedding," She shrugs. 

"You make an excellent point," You concede.

________________

With the food gone, and your heart somewhat unsqueezed, you and Noelle head back into the world. You walk her back as far as the shelter. You intend to leave her at the door, but Jimin sees you through the window before you can make your escape.

You contemplate running, pretending you didn't see him. But a confrontation is on the cards either way and it's probably better to get it over with than let Jimin drive his colleagues insane through the course of the day. Plus the man is far faster than he looks and he is stood in your path before you would've been able to escape anyway.

"Where the hell did you go?" The redhead tries to sound stern, but his voice cracks in the middle, your heart along with it, "You didn't wake anyone, you didn't answer your phone, you didn't even leave a note. Why?"

"I couldn't breathe, I didn't really think about it, I just knew I had to move," You answer honestly.

He sighs and glances around you, noticing the audience that seems to be gathering in the windows

He wraps an arm around your waist pulling you into him, and his other hand lands in your hair smoothing it down. He shuffles the two of you into the shadows of the building instead of standing out in the open where anyone can look out and see you there.

"Obviously you're not okay so I'm not going to ask you that... Are you... Is there anything I can do?"

"No, it's not your problem it's mine."

"Was it the proposal? I think that caught us all off guard and Taehyung doesn't expect you to go through with it."

A dry laugh escapes your mouth before you can stop it. Jimin takes a step back and meets your eyes.

"You don't believe me?" 

"I believe you that he doesn't expect me to go through with it, but I think we all know that I have to... and I want to! honestly, I do. I'll do anything so you guys don't, so we don't, lose Taehyung. I just need to get my head around it."

"I think you should go home Y/N. Talk with Jin or Namjoon, although maybe avoid Kookie and Taehyung until you can lie more convincingly than you did to me just now," He pecks your forehead and lets you go fully, "I'm so glad you're safe."

He sends you away with a promise to text him when you return home. You drag your feet the entire way knowing that Jimin is right and you need to talk through everything with a voice of reason. Jin might be the obvious choice, while a clown the majority of the time, his clinical doctor side allows him to separate emotion from sensitive topics. Something tells you that he isn't what you need right now. 

So when you reach the main house you walk inside the unfinished building and straight into Namjoon's new office finding him sitting at his new oak desk, just stroking the wood. He startles as your hand lands on his shoulder. 

"Shit Y/N, where did you come from?" He clutches at his chest dramatically. 

You flop down onto the new armchair as you wait for him to recover from his mini heart attack. He sits silently observing you for a moment too long until you start to wiggle uncomfortably.

"Are you ready to talk about it?" He reaches out a hand and places it on your knee. 

You thought you were, but the concern in his voice makes you hesitate. You just shake your head in response instead. 

"Okay, then let's not talk. Stand up." He stands too. 

He switches places with you sitting down in the armchair and pulling you back into his lap. He manhandles you until you're curled up on his knees with your face nuzzled into his neck. His fingers trace patterns along your thighs and the two of you sit in silence. 

The tightness in your chest is still there, curling up in Namjoon's arms is doing nothing to assuage that feeling but it still feels nice everywhere else. You think about what Noelle said about finding a new goal for yourself and you let yourself sniff Namjoon's comforting firewood scent. 

"I missed you this morning," He whispers in your ear. 

 "I'm sorry,"

"Don't be sorry, you needed space and that's okay. I just wanted you to know I missed you," 

He pecks your cheek and you continue sitting in silence. The rope around your heart seems to release, just a little as you allow yourself this comfort. 

"I love you," You whisper.

"I love you too," He confirms.

"I love all of you,"

"But you aren't ready to marry Taehyung, or any of us for that matter." He guesses

"I don't think so no... But I can't let Taehyung leave. I know better than anyone how it feels to be in a marriage you didn't choose. And it's so much worse for Taehyung, no one ever threatened me, I didn't have anyone I loved that I had to leave."

"We can think of other solutions for Tae Y/N. We aren't going to let you put yourself in a situation you don't truly want ."

"You don't know families like Tae's, families like mine. There isn't another option. I'm just going to suck it up and marry Taehyung."

"Ah yes, what every man wants to hear his fiance 'suck it up and marry him'" Namjoon chuckles.

You roll your eyes at his unserious response and start to wonder whether you should have gone to see Jin instead. 

"Look, this whole situation sucks for all of us, but there are other options we need to consider as a family, this burden doesn't lie on you. Now tell me what else is going on, because the proposal may have been a catalyst but it isn't the whole problem, I can see it in your eyes." 

"It's nothing," You sigh 

"If it's something, then it's everything. You listen to all our problems so often but won't let us listen to yours." He chastises.

"That's because you guys have real problems, I have stupid insecurities that have no basis in reality. There is no point in me bothering you with superficial issues."

"if it bothers you then it's not superficial and you should be talking to one of us. It doesn't have to be me, but I would love nothing more than for you to be able to confide in me."

"Really Joonie it's silly." You assure him.

"Tell me anyway," he insists. 

You contemplate confessing more of your issues. Realistically you know that he does actually want to help you but you also know the burden he already holds, having everyone else's concerns on his shoulder, you want nothing more than to lighten the load for him, not pile more on. However, you also know he won't drop it. 

"If I tell you, you have to promise you won't make a big deal out of it. It's my issue and it's something I will get over by myself,"

"Scouts honour," He crosses his heart.

"I'm fairly certain you weren't a scout," You raise an eyebrow.

"The sentiment still stands," He shrugs, "Now tell me."

So you tell him what you told Noelle. He listens intently to each minor problem, each insecure thought, and he doesn't say a word. But you can see the cogs turning in his brain as he tries to come up with solutions. As you finish speaking, you hold a finger up to his lips.

"But I..." He tries to speak around your finger but you just press harder against his lips.

"You promised," you chastise. 

He smirks and your finger slips past his lips and onto his tongue. 

He pulls on your wrist to remove the digit from his mouth but not before licking along the length.

"If you really don't want my opinion I won't give it... but I would love for you to sign your name on the lease." he suggests

"That sounds like a solution I didn't ask for," You complain.

"But it's an easy solution that makes so much sense, don't you think?"  He sounds far too excited, probably because he is right.

"Maybe... but I still need to come to terms with all these issues on my own Joonie," you enforce the boundary.

"And I will let you... if you let me distract you from those issues for a little while." He says suggestively.

"And how do you propose you do that?" You ask innocently.

He responds by replacing your finger in his mouth and using his now free hand to trace back up the inside of your thigh.

Next

Masterlist

[sgiandubh]

S on BBC 4's Saturday Live: 'anything but a quiet life'

As you all know, S was today on BBC Four's Saturday Live radio talk show, sharing the scene with people like super male model David Gandy, Catrin Finch - a Welsh harpist of international repute and the ever fascinating Lucy Worsley, a strong contender (along with Mary Beard) for the title of personal favorite (living) historian.

You can listen (as I dutifully did twice) to it here: https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/m001t96r. I don't know how to embed it on this page, but that shouldn't be a problem.

The show is always interesting and I strongly suggest to let it play along and not rely only on my summing up & comments. I particularly enjoyed Lucy Worsley's Medieval and Baroque musical selection (flawless!) - but enough said, we're here for S, who was live on show from BBC's London studios.

As usually, I am going to transcript it as much as I can, primarily for those reading this post and using Google Translate (@bat-cat-reader, you are served!). So, you will kindly excuse the length, thank you.

At the 07:40 mark, a half jocular mention when prompted by the host: not a cricketer and not a harpist either (you can say many things about S, but not that he's got no humor - always a big plus in my book). But then things quickly get emotional, when he immediately mentions his mother (the question generally asked was 'what did your parents sacrifice for you?'), who 'sacrificed a lot (...) [as] a single parent, (...) she gave us everything, I think'. And then he quickly gets emotional, mentioning Chrissie H. again:

'(...) can I give my mom a shoutout, it's her birthday, on Monday [Nikki Bedi, presenter: 'aww, of course you can!'], so happy birthday, Chrissie, and thank you so much and I wish... I'm glad you never got me a harp, because I would have never dedicated myself. I think that's why I became an actor, because I didn't have to work too hard at one thing.'

It's then David Gandy's turn to talk about his own rural childhood in Billericay (Essex), his close knit family and his parents' endeavor of building a business and the now incomprehensible need to use faxes, something he has now to 'explain to the younger ones'. Then Nikki Bedi turns to S (13:08): 'Sam's laughing at that. Do you remember faxes?' Answer: 'I do.. I mean, I remember faxes getting scripts through or couriers bringing you know, scripts to your door, it..it's just a completely different world, now, and I am sure the fashion world is completely different now, isn't it, David, I mean it's changed so much'.

Onwards to more questions asked by Mrs. Bedi. This one was interesting (19:16): 'Sam, do you fear that each job you do is an act that could be your last? Is that always in the back or front of your mind?' Answer: 'Yeah, I think.. David, I mean...um... earnestly, everything you're saying there kinda rings true for my career as well... I am sure for Catrin being, you know, being a musician, I think it's, you know [Nikki Bedi: is it true, Catrin? CF: yes, absolutely, yeah, many things David said... it's the same (...)'].

Huw Stevens mentions alternatives to 'gigs', the need to plan for the future and the fact 'you always have to remain busy', mentioning S's whisky. Gandy also mentions S ('you've got quite a few businesses [...] a man after my own heart, we'll then gonna have to go out'), immediately cued in by Nikki Bedi ('whisky, tequila, gin').

Just after Lucy Worsley's superb intervention (easily my favorite of the whole program!), cue in to the kilt on a glacier part of S's chit-chat I am sure we all dutifully 🙄, by now. I noted the slight hesitation in his voice, while mentioning 'my...my friend, Graham McTavish', so I will not - yeah, sue me-, I repeat: I will not transcript this verbatim, simply because it doesn't really bring anything new or important to what we all know, already. Sitting on a glacier 'in a kilt, in commando, yes, it's my claim to fame'. Disgruntled Tumblrettes, beware - he poked fun at himself (shall I sign this to you, or are you able to read my lips?) and that is something only very intelligent people are able to do without sounding pathetic. Another interesting thing is the way Nikki Bedi presented S ('the actor, award-winning liquor maker and writer'- 36:00), roughly midway of the whole broadcast.

His dedicated segment begins at the 49:10 mark and lasts until the end, about 10 minutes in all. He was introduced by Huw Stevens: "Sam Heughan, it seems, would like anything but a quiet life", plus some cursory bio elements, mentioning his mother's influence on his own creativity, his breakthrough as JAMMF, but also TCND (Nikki Bedi watches it and 'apparently the third episode is the most steamy' 🤦‍♀️). 'He is also a philanthropist, businessman and thrill seeker, and of course, as mentioned earlier, has his own whisky and is a best-selling author'. Mentions his 'parents, characterful people, hippies, in the Seventies, with a love for Tolkien'. S: 'my mum would probably kill me if I called her a hippie' - also, 'she is not the best singer, but there was always music around'. Stevens mentions the Gandalf's Garden Soho hippie community both his parents were a part of before he was born, but S doesn't develop it. The rest (difficult childhood, loner, using his imagination sparked his creativity, etc) we know from Waypoints. The very Scottish concept of 'stravaigin'' comes along in the conversation, which is not exactly a drifter and a bit more than a wanderer (if I understood correctly) - perhaps a good title for a second personal memoir, S? I'll leave this idea float in here for free, heh. OL comes along then, and by far the most interesting thing he mentioned about it is that "it is my life, it's taken over my life', hoping it would sparkle at least some conversation in the comments' thread. OL 'has also been hugely beneficial for Scotland, increased tourism by 200% in some locations (...), and it's all down to the magic of Scotland'.

Next projects: exciting not to really know what is next, but 'I am also saying no to a lot, because I am in a place now where I think the next decision is really important (...). I enjoy being in control now (....), producing my own shows and you know, my own products. (...) once you take control of that creativity (....) there's a lot of freedom and yeah, we shall see'.

And then Huw Stevens makes a joke - but was it really a joke? it's the BBC, after all - and says that all four of the guests could contribute something to what 'could be the next generation of Bond', (S: 'the finest British production'). Cue in an anecdote about S being invited to present an event to Buckingham Palace and taking a cab to a pub, right afterwards. MPC and tomorrow's book signing at Saint Pancras station wrap off the show.

Quickly, my 50 cents on it: way, way better than expected and S always delivers when they ask no weird questions about his private life (hallelujah, maybe they listen to us, after all?). The question about the fear of each job being the last reminded me of one of his answers in a very early interview: 'your biggest fear? getting the sack'. This time, his answer, whatever he intended to say, got lost in the brouhaha, but I suspect not much has changed, essentially, even if the 'after OL' part of the show strives to tell a more optimistic story.

But the thing that impressed me the most and in a very good way is the attention he got from all the other people invited in that studio. Unlike the social nobodies of Tumblr, they did not find bizarre the fact that he created his own spirits business and is actively promoting it. They were far from judging him: in fact, I even think he made a new friend of David Gandy, who had quite positive and nice and honest things to say about him. S was articulate and graceful and very moving every single time he mentioned Chrissie. And I am also sure he would have loved to share more things, especially when David was lovingly talking about his wife and daughters. But he couldn't. And that is a shame. But this too, shall pass - The Boy is slowly learning to say no to a lot of things, as he just let us know. Probably the best news we've got from him in a good while.

And now, onwards to a particularly venomous Anon I am still pondering the answer to.