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ericsonclan · 4 years ago

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Practically Brothers

Summary: Marlon and Louis spend some time helping each other out before having a joke off later that night.

Word Count: 2602

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“Careful, Lou! Don’t move so much!” Marlon warned as a bit of the vegetable oil spilled onto his pants leg.

“Shit, sorry!” Louis flashed an apologetic grin over at his best friend. “I just got excited I guess. We haven’t done a hairdo day in forever.”

Marlon smiled warmly at Louis’ words. It had been a while since they had done this. For the last couple years Louis and Marlon would get together in Louis’ room and surround themselves in the secret stash of pillows that Louis had (although everyone at Ericson knew about it so his stash wasn’t very secretive at all).

Once they got hidden away in the stash of pillows on his bed they would begin the process of helping each other with their hair. Life had been so hectic lately though that neither of them had had the time or energy for this special time together. With struggling to get enough food for everyone, making sure that the school was safe and dealing with more deadheads than they can count, everyone at the school was exhausted.

Marlon dipped his finger into the vegetable oil once more and began to moisturize Louis’ dreadlocks. Louis sat there quietly for a few moments before he began to whistle. Marlon bopped his head around here and there to the tune. The two of them enjoyed the peaceful moment as Marlon continued to work on Louis’ dreads. After a few seconds Louis stopped humming and his eyes wandered over to the small amount of vegetable oil that stood in an old soda bottle.

“I hope Omar never finds out how much of his vegetable oil we’ve stolen,” Louis’ words made Marlon pause for a moment before resuming. Louis didn’t have to look at his best friend’s face to know that he was smiling.

“Yeah, this will be a secret that we take to the grave,” Marlon held out his hand that wasn’t coated in the oil and Louis shook it firmly.

“We shook on it so now we gotta keep it a secret,” Louis smiled as he sat still.

“I was going to keep it a secret either way. Omar is scary when it comes to food,” Marlon’s words made Louis laugh softly.

“Isn’t that the truth,” Louis looked outside the window and noticed that some of the leaves were beginning to fall. Soon this season would be over and the cold harshness of winter would be upon them. Louis wondered how much stress would weigh on Marlon’s shoulders throughout that season. Marlon never seemed to take on more than he could bear. At least that was the impression that Louis had gotten over the years. Louis snuck a glance back at his friend. He was really thankful to have Marlon as a leader. He won hands down over all the shitty adults that had left them the moment the world went to hell.

“All done,” Marlon spoke up and wiped off the oil on his hands before he took off his letterman jacket. The blond tossed it beside him on his right and shifted his weight. Louis scooted over on his knees and grabbed the knife.

“Alright, dude, stay extremely still or I might accidentally shave off part of your mullet.” Louis smirked.

Marlon frowned over at his friend for a moment before a subtle smirk appeared on his lips. “That would be way too high a price to pay.”

“It would be a travesty,” Louis began to shave the right side of Marlon’s head where some new hair was growing in. He only needed to shave a small portion of it. “Have no fear, I won’t harm this majestic mane,” Louis grinned and continued his task. Once the right side was done he picked up his friend’s jacket and shook the loose hairs off onto the floor before tossing the jacket over on Marlon’s other side. Shuffling over, Louis began the process once again on the left side. The room was quiet except for some quips from Louis here and there. After a few minutes he was done. Louis scooted back and nodded proudly. “Yep, you are still rocking that eighties look!”

“Someone has to,” Marlon smiled and worked to get his jacket back on. He glanced out the window and saw the slant of the sun. “Shit, I need to go talk to Brody about the fishing shack. Could you find Aasim and go over the traps again? It will be easier if you’re there seeing as you’re the one who made them and all,”

“I’ll see if I can. My piano may be calling to me,” Louis got off of his bed and stretched.

“Louis, please. For me,”

Marlon’s tone made Louis pause before nodding. “Okay, I will be with Mr. Stick in the Mud in two shakes of a lamb’s tail!”

Marlon chuckled at Louis’ words then waved goodbye. Soon both of them were off to their respective tasks.

The day went by fairly smoothly. Marlon had been able to figure out a solution with Brody regarding the efficiency of the current fishing spot while Louis had fixed the traps. All it had cost was a headache that Aasim claimed he had gotten from Louis’ talking. Louis insisted this was a false accusation and that Aasim simply didn’t drink enough water that day.

Evening was quickly upon them. After Ruby and Sophie had worked to prep the ingredients with Omar for dinner and once the perfectionist chef himself signed off on the meal, dinner was served. Louis immediately took a spot next to Marlon who was sitting at a table with Ruby, Brody and Rosie. The pitbull casually sat beside Marlon who snuck little treats to her here and there when Ruby wasn’t looking.

The four of them ate the food happily, enjoying the warm, comforting stew that they had eaten for years and would continue to until the walkers got them or - as Sophie had proudly declared - old age did. She always believed that all of them could live until they were old and withered. Dinner continued to be peaceful as people at the different tables chatted and conversed until Marlon let out a huge burp.

“Good Lord,” Ruby waved a hand in front of her face and frowned at Marlon.

“Sorry,” Marlon smiled sheepishly and began to sip his stew when Louis spoke up.

“Yeah, you should be. This is a real burp!” Louis belched loudly, causing Marlon to nearly choke on his stew. The pair laughed loudly while Ruby got up and stormed off with a huff.

“Honestly, you two,” Brody got up and jogged after Ruby. The pair talked quietly for a minute before Brody offered that they could have some tea which brightened up Ruby’s mood immensely.

“Alright, Marlon, it's a joke-off time,” Louis grinned and saw the sparkle of joy in Marlon’s eyes.

“Okay, but you better get ready to lose. You’re the one that's going to get stuck with dish duty,” Marlon smirked over at Louis.

“That’s funny because I could’ve sworn I saw your name on the list for dish duty.” Louis returned the look back at his best friend.

Soon Mitch and Aasim moved to a table nearby Marlon and Louis’ table along with Willy who jumped down onto the spot next to Mitch. All of them were interested in seeing this joke-off. It had become a fairly regular routine with this pair. Marlon and Louis would throw back jokes back and forth and whoever ran out of jokes first or felt that the other one had done better would lose. The loser would then be stuck with an annoying chore.

Louis cleared his throat and decided to start the joke off. “I saw you picking flowers the other day for a girl,” Louis leaned forward and looked at his friend. “I bet Rosie liked them.”

Marlon smiled at that joke before adding in his own. “Hey Lou, the spiders called. They want their baby back,” Marlon smirked when he saw that Louis had understood he was referring to his hair.

“Oh ho ho, well played,” Louis grinned. No one else seemed impressed by these jokes. They were usually bad, corny or downright dumb jokes about Marlon or Louis. Occasionally Rosie or one of the other kids got thrown into the jokes but that was less frequent. Louis pondered his next joke for a while before delivering it with a smirk. “Marlon is so white that sunscreen puts him on,”

Marlon chuckled at that which made Louis laugh as well. “Oh yeah? Well, Louis, I hate to break it to you but the tooth fairy doesn’t take teeth that are lost on account of being a dumbass,”

Louis’ eyes widened at those words and he held his heart in mock sadness. Marlon began to laugh some more at that which in turn made Louis’ laughter grow. “Hey, Marlon, y’know why Rosie has a mattress in the headmaster’s office? It's because you smell so bad even she won’t sleep next to you,”

Marlon felt the zing of that one and immediately had a comeback. “Well the only reason your piano doesn't run away from your stank is because its legs don’t work!”

Louis paused at Marlon’s words, impressed by the reply. The pair was quiet for a second before they burst out laughing. The two of them continued to shoot jokes and zingers back and forth until Marlon held up his hands.

“Alright, alright, I’ll forfeit this round but you’d better watch out for next time,” He smiled competitively at his best friend. Louis returned the look and leaned his elbows on the table.

“We’ll see about that. After all, both of us are-”

“Idiots,” Violet butted into the conversation as she walked by with the twins and Tenn.

“Actually it's pronounced geniuses. We are joke masters.” Louis smiled at the blonde who rolled her eyes as Marlon and Louis high fived.

“Well, you’ll face the daunting task of being under the watchful eye of Omar as you clean dishes tomorrow,” Louis stood up from his spot.

“Oh boy, I can't wait,” Marlon quipped and rose as well.

“You still have one more night of freedom. So how about you join me in the music room?” Louis offered and Marlon nodded warmly.

“Sounds good to me, Lou. I just need to grab something from the headmaster’s office.” Marlon began to walk alongside Louis.

“Alright, then I shall see you soon. If you get lost, just follow the sound of my mesmerizing music,” Louis pulled on the sides of his coat as he strolled forward.

“Will do, but I think Rosie and I will be able to navigate the winding halls of the admin building just fine,” Marlon waved a quick goodbye to Louis before jogging up the stairs. Rosie followed close behind.

Minutes later Marlon had entered the office. He strolled forward and reached out for the map that lay on the table. His eyes wandered over it for a second before he felt Rosie pawing at his leg. “Sorry, girl,” Marlon gave the pitbull some loving pats and headscratches. “We can go hang out with Louis now,” Marlon tucked away the map in his pocket and grabbed the red pencil.

Rosie led the way down the stairs and happily trotted towards the music room where Louis had begun to play his music. Based on the strained notes and the slightly off-centered music, Marlon guessed that the piano was due for a tuning. Louis turned when he heard the door creak open thanks to Rosie’s paws whacking against it.

“Seems you were able to find the music room after all,” Louis smiled playfully at his friend who returned the smile.

“Yeah, it was a good thing I had Rosie with me.” Marlon sat down on one of the chairs and a pile of dust shot up and swarmed his face. He coughed loudly and Louis stopped his playing for a moment.

“You okay? Getting choked up because you lost the joke off?”

Louis’s words made Marlon look over with a competitive expression. “Ha, you wish,” Marlon coughed loudly for another moment before he took a deep breath.

Louis studied his best friend for a moment to make sure he was really okay before he began to play the piano again. His fingers danced around on the keys, creating a beautiful, playful melody that was only partially lost due to the untuned piano.

Marlon listened and smiled softly as he looked at the map. His mind quickly wandered back onto the safety of the school. He wondered if it was wise to start enforcing a tighter safe zone. After a few minutes Marlon decided against it. He wouldn’t make any major changes, at least not tonight. He doubted he’d be able to properly assess such a weighty decision at the end of the day when his energy was low. So instead he enjoyed his friend’s music.

After a little while Louis stopped his playing. “Y’know, maybe you should learn to play the piano,”

Louis’ words made Marlon glance up. “Yeah, well I bet I’d sound pretty shitty compared to you,”

“That's what practice is for. Surprising as it may be, I wasn’t always a piano master. Shocking, I know,”

Louis’ words made Marlon crack a smile. “I think I’ll stick to the guitar, thanks.”

“Well, I’m sure the day you track one down will come soon. With all the wild stuff we’ve found on some of these deadheads, I wouldn’t be surprised if we found one with a guitar,” Louis spun around on his piano bench to look at Marlon.

“That would be the dream. I miss playing guitar,” Marlon tilted his head back with a tired smile. “Well, it's getting late so I should head to bed.”

“Alright,” Louis rose up from his spot to sneak in some final pets for Rosie. He knelt down and whispered conspiratorially to the pitbull. “Make sure he actually gets some sleep, Rosie.”

“Hey, I can hear you,” Marlon looked down at his friends as he placed his hands on his hips.

“Damn, looks like we got caught, Rosie,” Louis’ gaze focused on the pitbull who was panting happily. “Alright, but seriously dude. Don’t push yourself,” Louis’ eyes locked with Marlon’s.

“I won’t,” Marlon smiled reassuringly and was relieved to see that his friend relaxed at those words before standing back up. Marlon continued to look at Louis for a moment before he walked forward and gave him a hug. Louis immediately returned it. The two of them held onto that hug for a moment before Marlon let go. He gave a final smile and wave, wishing Louis goodnight before heading off towards the headmaster’s office.

Marlon slowly walked down the hall, his eyes glancing around at all the graffiti that covered the walls as he walked up the stairs. Today had been a good day. He had been able to give his mind a few moments to get away from all the stress that being the leader brought, but now it was time to focus again.

Marlon glanced back at the music room as the sound of the piano filled the halls once more. He was really glad to have a friend like Louis. No, friend wasn’t the right word. Brother felt more fitting. Even though the world had gone to shit and life could be hell he knew he would always have Louis on his side. With that comforting thought putting Marlon’s heart at ease, he began to climb the stairs again, ready to continue his role as protector of the school.

#twdg #twdg louis #twdg marlon #twdg rosie #marlon rosie brotp #louis marlon brotp #fanfic

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tuellertrails · 4 years ago

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We’re 3 weeks into our hike so far, here are a few things I have learned

- Wake up EARLY in the desert. Because it will get hotter than hell and you will die of heatstroke if you hike in the heat of the day.

- Take your shoes (foot prisons) off at every opportunity. Your feet will thank you

- The higher you go in elevation, the harder the hiking is, the less hot it becomes and the more beautiful the scenery is. The desert has its own kind of beauty, but being in an alpine environment with lots of trees and the smell of sun warmed pine needles is my favorite place to be (besides a comfortable bed watching TV and eating snacks, of course). We’ve had several days of hiking where we’ve done over 5k feet of elevation, and I find that I am particularly prone to swearing and exhaustion on those days 😂. But the incredible views do make up for it somewhat! It’s all part of the experience.

- Ibuprofen (Vitamin I) and Benadryl are a hikers best friend.

- Pack out fresh food whenever you can. Vegetables and fruit have never tasted so good.

- Kindness is EVERYWHERE. We’ve received food, cold drinks, rides, camp chairs to sit in and many other kindnesses from trail angels, other hikers, family members and random people. Everything is appreciated.

Speaking of kindness, we spent several hours one day waiting out the heat of the day in a small hut next to the wind farm made for hot, suffering PCT hikers, with a cooler of cold water for us to enjoy. It was 95* even in the shade 🥵. We did not leave early enough that day, but it gave me the chance to wait out the heat and look at my phone 😂.

Here’s some highlights/points of interest from the last 100+ miles

- We heard a great story from Trail Angel who gave us a ride out of Julian, who heard it from a different hiker that she gave a ride to. So the hiker was hiking down the trail (early on, around mile 15) when he hears a voice say "hello". He looks down and sees a guy laying in the bushes in a sleeping bag with mud on his face. "Oh, uh... hello" the hiker says. The man responds "Would you like to be blessed with magic sand?" And holds up a pile of sand in his hand. The guy wasn't sure if this dude was on drugs, was going to throw the sand in his face or what, and he's contemplating how to side step this very weird man when the dude stands up and reveals that he is completely naked and says "You should really use mud. It makes the best sunscreen". Glad that it wasn’t me, poor guy.

- We went through a small town in Warner Springs who had a gas station and some picnic tables, so basically a hiker haven. We spent a couple of hours eating gas station food, and I gave another hiker a shot in the butt 😂. Nursing skills always coming in handy out here. Landon consistently says that the gas station hot dog was one of the highlights of the trail.

- My feet are MUCH better than they were. Getting inserts and some foot compression socks were a game changer for me. I now can walk many more miles without having to stop so often to roll out the golf balls on my feet. Despite this, hiking is still hard and we still find new soreness, aches and pains every day. But I do think that we are toughening up and able to do more miles than we did the first week. My blisters are mostly hardened now, and we have done as many as 18 miles in a day at this point.

- Water can be very scarce, and you have to plan out your water carries very carefully. One water source in this last stretch was a big water tank a few hundred feet from “Mikes Place”. Mikes Place is near the trail and has a big water cistern for hikers to go and get water, but they also let hikers camp and party there and sometimes feed them. There were some comments on Guthooks (the hiking navigation app we use) about how Mikes Place was kind of sketchy and borderline sexist, but we went down there with our hiker friends Sarah and Clyde, hoping for some food. Mikes place was interesting to say the least. It was a run down one story house that looked rather shabbily built, with a blanket as a wall in one section. It’s in a few acres of property, and there are all sorts of random things in front of the house. An assortment of stools and chairs, some lawn games like croquet and darts, a fire pit, a few coolers, and then even more random things like a sword stuck in a stone (a replica like in the movie). There was also an old painted car on one end, a shabby outdoor kitchen with a pizza oven and a greasy grill and lots of bowls and plates and utensils, and lots of other items spread out across the property. It seemed a little hoarder-y to us. They had Johnny cash playing in the background which kind of fit the vibe of the place. There were a few hikers there eating already, and a more stout gentleman wearing a t shirt, shorts and flip flops whose name was Scott. He said that there was no food left but that we could cook our own if we wanted, and we were like "ummm, sure?"  So he brought out the ingredients for breakfast burritos and we got to cracking eggs and slicing veggies and fired up the very greasy outdoor grill, and within about 15 minutes we were eating breakfast burritos. Scott was a little weird. He would pop in and out of where we were cooking and then disappear again, I guess he was nice enough but he just gave off a bit of a weird vibe. Apparently Mike lives in San Diego and Scott is a caretaker of his place for now, along with another guy named Spirit who we met a little later as we ate. He was a older guy, with long white hair in a ponytail and beard, wearing a dirty green zip hoodie with what looked to be a hand painted "VVR" on it, jeans and chacos. He chatted with us briefly, he is a hiker who has hiked the John Muir Trail every year since 2014 and then decided to go work at VVR, a resort in the Sierras, after visiting it so many times. He said he was headed up there in a few weeks. Anyways, we are our burritos, washed our plates, said thank you and left to go filter water from the tank up above, leaving some money in the donation box as a thank you. The food was good but I definitely wouldn't have felt comfortable being there by myself, Mike’s Place was a little...dirt baggy, but I’m glad I got to experience it all the same. Apparently Scott is hiking now, and showed up at the campground in Idyllwild a few days later, drunk as a skunk and vomited all over 😂.

- We’re 10% done with the trail! Which really puts into perspective how long this hike actually is 😂. We had heard that our trail legs would start to come in after 3 weeks, but both Landon and I agree that we’re still quite sore and wake up with different aches and pains every day. We are definitely running a major calorie deficit at this point, burning upwards of 4K calories per day, burning much more than we are eating. This is ok with us, as we could both lose 30 Lbs or more and still be in a healthy weight range! Our friend Jamie, who hiked the trail years ago with her husband, says that we are losing our “town fat”. But we both agree that our clothes are feeling a bit looser than they were before. Who knew that 3 weeks of near continuous intense exercise would do that? We are slowly getting more fit, so hopefully those trail legs will come in soon here in the next few weeks.

- Remember the girl I talked about in our last post a few weeks ago, who woke up our friend at 5 AM and told him that she had no pants? Well, he came across her again a few days ago. She was topless, sitting in a stream in her underwear, playing a ukelele. And much to his chagrin, she remembered him! 😂 Not exactly a meet cute.

- Though there are definitely some eccentric people out here, 95% of the hikers and people we meet are wonderful. We have met the most incredible people as we hike, and are grateful to have made some good friends. They say that trauma bonds you, and all of the hikers have similar trauma out on trail 😂. We all know how hard this is, how beautiful, and have experienced first hand the heavy packs we carry after filling up our food and water, and the different aches and pains that accompany hiking day after day. Ive seen some pretty gnarly feet 🦶among the hikers out here, covered in blisters and cuts, with blackened toenails and foot fungus. Our feet are constantly getting beaten up! I’m glad to know that it isn’t just us experiencing the aches and pains. Ive always been a bit of a social butterfly, and after a year of isolation due to the Covid pandemic, the extrovert in me is absolutely loving the social aspect of our hike.

We will be getting off trail for four days this next weekend to go to a family wedding and sadly, a funeral as well. We were saddened to hear that Landon’s Grandfather has passed away, after suffering from Alzheimer’s for many years in the last years of his life. I never knew him before the Alzheimer’s had affected him, but I was told that he was smart as a whip, very funny, and a great story teller. Landon has fond memories of his grandfather, going on family trips and hearing his many stories. Even after the disease progression, Arlin was a very sweet and gentle man who was happy to give you a hug and listen to you talk, even if he didn’t quite remember who you were. We feel very lucky to have been able to spend some time with him and with Landon’s Grandmother the week before the trail, and he will be greatly missed by all. We are looking forward to getting off trail for a few days to reunite with our family to both celebrate and mourn together.

Thanks to everyone for the love and support in our PCT journey so far, this has been the most incredible experience of our lives so far and we’re grateful for every second, no matter how tough, of this great adventure.

- The Tueller’s

#pct #pct2021 #pctclassof2021 #tuellertrails #hikertrash

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kangtaebins · 4 years ago

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Weird Asks That Say A Lot

I said I was going to just answer all of these bc of boredom,, and so here I am

1. Coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans? Teacups are aesthetically pleasing idc what anyone says

2. Chocolate bars or lollipops? Lollipops

3. Bubblegum or cotton candy? Cotton candy supremacy

4. How did your elementary school teachers describe you? I was told that I was a leader a lot, and was told that I was very intelligent. Ah yes, I suffered from gifted kid burn out in high school-

5. Do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups? Look, plastic cups are the best. Specifically the ones with the lids and reusable straws

6. Pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear? It truly depends on the day bc some days I would say goth and other days I’d say grunge, but most days- pastel

7. Earbuds or headphones? Earbuds

8. Movies or TV shows? TV shows bc- idk actually I’m just not a movie person

9. Favorite smell in the summer? I have a weird obsession with the smell of cheap sunscreen and I have no clue why

10. Game you were best at in p.e.? I hated gym in high school and rarely participated despite the teacher being irritated with me (truly she gave up after a few months bc I really did not care at all) HOWEVER- I went to town in volleyball and still enjoy playing volleyball v much

11. What do you have for breakfast on an average day? I don’t eat breakfast often,,,

12. Name of your favorite playlist? Probably my Navy or Indigo playlist

13. Lanyard or key ring? Key ring

14. Favorite non-chocolate candy? Anything green apple!!!

15. Favorite book you read as a school assignment? I actually genuinely enjoyed Romeo And Juliet tbh

16. Most comfortable position to sit in? I always curl up in a ball on the couch, but in a chair I manspread ngl

17. Most frequently worn pair of shoes? Nike slides <//3

18. Ideal weather? Between 50-70 degrees, sunny but not warm, being able to wear a hoodie and not be hot or cold

19. Sleeping position? I usually either sleep on my left side or on my stomach (my back once in a while when it’s hurting bc I’m a hag)

20. Preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)? I write on my phone more than anything

21. Obsession from childhood? Hm- I was really obsessed with High School Musical as a kid. My friend and I would put it on and lip sync to the songs and pretend we were the characters

22. Role model? Is it- wrong to say myself? Bc I feel like that sounds arrogant but genuinely it’s bc I’m constantly trying to better myself mentally and learn and grow. Idk I just am proud of who I am and look to myself when I need to find motivation

23. Strange habits? Strange? Idk if it’s strange but I’m constantly twiddling with the hem of my sleeves bc I love the feeling of it

24. Favorite crystal? Citrine

25. First song you remember hearing? WH- bitch idk tf

26. Favorite activity to do in warm weather? Stay tf inside in the air conditioning

27. Favorite activity to do in cold weather? Stay tf inside in the heat

28. Five songs to describe you? To describe me?? Girl idk I'm all over the place. How about songs that resonate with me instead,,, Alive by Khalid, Paranoid by Lauv, Phobia by Dvwn, Fake Smile by Ariana Grande, and Breathin by Ariana Grande

29. Best way to bond with you? Truly I'm not very difficult to get along with, just don't be an asshole. Talk to me about psychology, current events, say Soobin is the cutest to exist idk it's not that hard

30. Places that you find sacred? I- hm. I'm not like a church person or anything so idk. Maybe just anything really old or places with very detailed and unique architecture

31. What outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names? I don't own many clothes,,, let alone nice clothes. I also don't really dress to impress I'd much rather be comfortable

32. Top five favorite vines? Oh god if I h a d to pick???? The lipstick in the Valentino bag, they were roommates, it's an avocado- thaaanks, jared 19, and uh,,, zach stooppp you're gonna get in trouble

33. Most used phrase in your phone? Tbh it's probably "girl what-" or "no bc"

34. Advertisements you have stuck in your head? That 877-CASH-NOW ONE JFC

35. Average time you fall asleep? Between 11pm-1am

36. What is the first meme you remember ever seeing? Probably the troll face one or smth

37. Suitcase or duffel bag? Suitcase

38. Lemonade or tea? I mix them together!

39. Lemon cake or lemon meringue pie? Lemon meringue pie bc I don't really like cake

40. Weirdest thing to ever happen at your school? Y'all I- went to a hs/college mixed school,, I've seen it all. Weirdest?? Idk but one weird thing I remember was when we were making whistles in art and some dude made a penis whistle 😭

41. Last person you texted? My best friend :))

42. Jacket pockets or pants pockets? Jacket pockets

43. Hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket? Hoodie 100%

44. Favorite scent for soap? I love soaps that smell like soap. Like ok duh I know that sounds dumb but yk what I mean? I don't want lemon or mint or whatever, I like the plain soap smell

45. Which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero? Fantasy

46. Most comfortable outfit to sleep in? Oversized t-shirt, no pants. I question anyone that is comfortable sleeping with pants on-

47. Favorite type of cheese? Feta!

48. If you were a fruit, what kind would you be? I feel like I'd be a pineapple and I have no clue why

49. What saying or quote do you live by? Not necessarily a quote but more of a thought: live for yourself, enjoy each day, do what gives you joy

50. What made you laugh the hardest you ever have? I have had so many instances in which I have laughed so hard I peed and to even attempt to name one is impossible

51. Current stresses? Making sure my family gets their vaccines and stays safe

52. Favorite font? I don't think I have one? Anything except comic sans

53. What is the current state of your hands? What does this even mean 💀 I mean,, they're holding my phone, cold, and my nails are unpolished

54. What did you learn from your first job? That people are assholes but I'm capable of not giving a fuck bc life is not that damn serious

55. Favorite fairy tale? Is The Three Little Pigs considered a fairy tale?

56. Favorite tradition? Putting up the Christmas tree with my mom :( it's always a lot of fun

57. The three biggest struggles you’ve overcome? Depression, grief, and hopefully one day- smth I'm currently dealing with

58. Four talents you’re proud of having? Makeup!! But also: singing, crying on command, and tying cherry stems with my tongue

59. If you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be? Sick of these bitches

60. If you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be? I don't watch anime so idk

61. Favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.? It's this line from Eleanor & Park: "Eleanor was right: She never looked nice. She looked like art, and art wasn't supposed to look nice; it was supposed to make you feel something."

62. Seven characters you relate to? Holy hell, 7?? Probably won't get that many but hm,,, Darlene from Roseanne, Hermione from Harry Potter, Emily from Pretty Little Liars maybe?? Idk I suddenly blanked

63. Five songs that would play in your club? As if it's Your Last by BP, anything from SHINee, anything from Ariana, also anything Rihanna, just a bunch of women tbh

64. Favorite website from your childhood? FUCKING WEBKINZ BRO

65. Any permanent scars? I have a few on my arms idk where they came from tbh, I also have one on my hand from my sister 🧍🏻‍♀

66. Favorite flower(s)? Sunflowers!!! I also really love lilacs 💔

67. Good luck charms? My dog's collar that I wear as a bracelet

68. Worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried? Licorice-

69. A fun fact that you don’t know how you learned? It takes repeating a piece of information 12 times at random to memorize it completely

70. Left or right handed? Right

71. Least favorite pattern? Fucking chevron- and realistic camo, and anything with the American flag

72. Worst subject? Yall im awful at history. American history, world history, all of it-

73. Favorite weird flavor combo? Either pickles and peanut butter or cheese and grapes

74. At what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen? I'm stubborn but also always in pain so I've become numb to a lot of body pains. I have to be at like a 7-8 before I take smth otherwise I'd always be taking it

75. When did you lose your first tooth? I was probably like 5 I was definitely in Kindergarten

76. What’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)? I fw baked potatoes

77. Best plant to grow on a windowsill? I have a love for succulents

78. Coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store? Oh my- I don't drink coffee but coffee from a gas station

79. Which looks better, your school id photo or your driver’s license photo? Driver's license for sure

80. Earth tones or jewel tones? Jewel tones

81. Fireflies or lightning bugs? I say both,, but I think I say lightning bugs more

82. PC or console? PC

83. Writing or drawing? Both

84. Podcasts or talk radio? Podcasts definitely

84. Barbie or polly pocket? Barbie

85. Fairy tales or mythology? Fairy tales

86. Cookies or cupcakes? C o o k i e s

87. Your greatest fear? Losing people I love

88. Your greatest wish? To live comfortably and be a great mother

89. Who would you put before everyone else? My family

90. Luckiest mistake? Guessing on 90% of a test and getting an A 💀

91. Boxes or bags? Bags are easier to carry-

92. Lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights? Fairy lights!!

93. Nicknames? Sam, Sammi, my sister calls me Sams, my best friend calls me Bub, and my gf calls me Baby if that counts- 👀

94. Favorite season? Fall omg it's gorgeous and has perfect temperatures

95. Favorite app on your phone? ✨tumblr✨

96. Desktop background? Its literally a pic of Soobin, Taehyun, and Beomgyu

97. How many phone numbers do you have memorized? Like 4-5

98. Favorite historical era? The one where white people learn their fucking place and stop being racist, homophobic, classist, sexist, all the -ists and -phobics,,,, so none. Fuck history :))

#idk what to put in the tags so if you actually read all of these then damn you're the real mvp

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my-proof-is-you · 5 years ago

Text

Just One Week - Part 1

Dean x Reader AU

A broken engagement leads you to go on your honeymoon alone to pick up the pieces of your heart. While there, you meet an incredibly handsome man to spend the week with. Being around a guy again should have been the last thing on your mind.

But hey, it’s just one week...right?

Masterlist

You

As the plane touched down, you looked out the window, asking yourself for the millionth time what you were doing.

You stood up, getting your carry-on down from the overhead compartment. A sweet-looking older lady stood in the aisle behind you, and gave you a small smile. You saw her look into your row--as if she was looking for someone else--before averting her gaze.

That’s right, lady. I’m all alone.

You rolled your eyes and continued down the aisle. When you got off the plane you were surrounded immediately by the perfect Hawaii weather. Despite the crushing sadness you were feeling, the warm sun made you smile a bit.

An hour later you were at your resort, complete with a lei around your neck and a Mai Tai in hand. Though you couldn’t believe you went on your honeymoon alone, you were ready to do whatever it took to forget the son-of-a-bitch that got you there in the first place.

Dean

Being on vacation was the last thing Dean wanted to do.

His stupid brother dragged him to Hawaii. He claimed all Dean did was “work” and that “he needed to take a break.”

Psh. Spending sixty hours a week in my auto shop was hardly what I would call “work.”

“Dude, remind me again why I’m here,” he said, walking next to his brother toward the resort entrance.

Sam rolled his eyes. “Because, you were running on E, man. It was time for a break.”

“Yeah, Dean, there’s nothing wrong with taking a little time off. Surf...swim...ladies?” Cas said, throwing his arm around Dean’s shoulders. Cas was the third participant in the “guys trip,” and Sam and Dean’s best friend.

“I can get ladies at home!” Dean insisted.

“Oh yeah?” Sam asked, challenging. “And when was the last time you even went on a date?”

“Uh…” Dean sputtered.

“Exactly. So shut up,” Sam said with a smirk. “It’s just one week.”

“Bitch,” Dean replied.

“Jerk.” Sam shoved his brother a little bit. The men were coming up on the front desk, and Sam stepped up to check them in.

Dean’s eyes scanned the lobby of the resort, taking it all in for the first time. Cas stood by the other end of the check-in desk to his right, filling a plastic cup with lemon-infused water. The rest of the room was huge, complete with fancy looking couches and an indoor fountain. In the center of the room was a wrap-around bar with every liquor imaginable.

It was when his eyes got to the elevators that he finally saw something he found interesting.

You were wearing a simple black sundress that hit just above your knees. Your long Y/H/C hair was flowing down in relaxed waves, and Dean could tell even from a distance that your eyes were a beautiful shade of Y/E/C.

The thing that really got his attention, though, was your smile.

At first glance, you didn’t look very happy. Dean kept watching mindlessly for a minute, though, and saw you interact with an employee of the resort. He took your bag for you, and you smiled at him in thanks.

It was beautiful.

Before he could think about you anymore, though, the elevator doors opened and you disappeared inside.

“Dude, you ready?” Cas asked, nudging Dean. He snapped back to attention and looked at his friend.

“Yeah, let’s get this week started,” he said, shouldering his bag and heading toward the elevators. “God knows it won’t be over soon enough,” he added under his breath.

You

Your empty room was depressing you. Especially since it was all set up to be the honeymoon suite. It was a really nice room, complete with a king sized bed, Jacuzzi tub, and big, open balcony. There were rose petals everywhere, though, the floral smell making you want to gag. You decided you needed to get out.

More importantly, you needed to get drunk.

You put on one of your new bikinis and checked yourself in the mirror. Your body wasn’t quite where you had wanted it to be before your wedding. Correction: your body wasn’t quite where Matt had wanted it to be before the wedding. You were curvy, but still looked good in the swimsuit. You threw on your cover-up and grabbed your beach bag, walking out the door and heading down to the pool.

You stopped at one of the many bars and ordered yourself a long island iced tea, opting for something a little stronger than your first drink. You ordered an additional shot of tequila, ignoring your inner voice telling you not to.

I need this, bitch, you told her.

You settled on one of the lounge chairs next to the pool, removing your cover-up and slathering on some sunscreen before reading a magazine while you waited for your drinks to come.

You looked up from your magazine when you heard the playful joking of a group of guys...well, men was more like it.

The three men that walked on the other side of the pool were nothing short of gorgeous.

The tallest one had flowing chestnut hair. You usually didn’t like long hair on guys, but he was totally working it.

The shortest had dark hair and a perfectly lopsided smile.

The one in the middle, though, had you biting your lip.

He had disheveled, sandy blonde hair and perfect green eyes that you could see the color of even at your distance. When they found three chairs together, he removed his shirt.

Your mouth almost started watering.

He was chiseled, and he had the look of a man that knew how to put in a hard day’s work.

God, Y/N, get it together. You aren’t here to check out guys. You’re here to heal.

You forced yourself to look back down at your magazine, ignoring the sound of the men’s splashes as they jumped into the pool.

Dean

She’s here.

Dean’s eyes were immediately drawn to you, the girl he’d seen by the elevators. Cas and Sam were joking around as the three of them got settled in their chairs, but Dean couldn’t join in wholeheartedly. He was distracted by the sight of you in a bikini.

“Why don’t you go talk to her?” Sam said, nudging Dean with his elbow.

“She’s by herself. She probably doesn’t want to be bothered.”

“You won’t know if you don’t try,” Cas added.

“I thought this was supposed to be a guys’ trip!”

“I think I speak for both of us when I say that you need to get laid,” Cas said with a smirk. Dean punched him in the arm.

“You have to admit...you’ve been pretty uptight lately. You should at least give it a shot. Invite her to hang out,” Sam said with an encouraging smile.

Dean thought about it. He didn’t really want to be on the vacation in the first place. But if he was going to be there, he may as well try to have a good time. Besides, who even knows if you’re single?

It’s worth a shot.

You

A few minutes later your drinks came, the waiter placing them down next to you. You gave him a small tip so he would keep the drinks coming.

“You’re not messing around, huh?” you heard from near your feet. You lowered your magazine and saw the guy you were checking out leaning on his forearms at the edge of the pool closest to you.

You felt your heart pick up a little. Damn, look at that perfect smile.

“You could say that,” you responded before downing your shot.

“Hmm. My buddies and I will have to play catch-up.” He gave you a crooked smile and you felt yourself smiling back at him.

“And who says you’re invited to my personal drinking party?” you asked cheekily.

He pulled himself out of the water, causing the muscles in his arms to bulge. You blinked up at him as he came to sit in the lounge chair next to you.

“Dunno. You just seem kinda lonely, I guess.”

You felt your face fall at that. He wasn’t wrong.

“Well I’m also not so sure about spending time with three strange men.”

“Well...my name is Dean,” he said, sticking out his hand. You shook it, an eyebrow raised. “That’s my brother Sam,” he said, pointing to the tallest man. “And that’s our friend, Cas.”

You narrowed your eyes.

“See? Not strangers,” he said before giving you a megawatt smile. “C’mon, it’s just one week.”

You thought about what he was saying. You were going to be cautious, of course. But you were only two hours into your vacation and you could already tell that going it alone wasn’t going to work.

“Okay. But I have conditions.”

Dean gestured with his hand as if to say, “go ahead.”

“Until I feel like I can trust you, we only hang out in public.”

“Smart,” he said, nodding.

“And you guys are buying the drinks,” you said with a smirk. “But only where I can see them. Just in case.”

“Again, smart.”

“And...my name is Y/N.”

He smiled again. “It’s nice to meet you, Y/N.”

Forevers:

@malfoysqueen14

@divadinag

@lynne1993

@awesome-badass-cafeteria-sauce

@infj-slytherclaw

@onethirstyunicorn

@sammykb1994

Deanies:

@tftumblin

@deans-baby-momma

@akshi8278

@weepingwillowphoenix

@playingdeep17

@justanotherwinchester

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gyllenbaabe · 5 years ago

Text

✧･ﾟ: *prompt list*:･ﾟ✧

F L U F F:

“Stay here tonight.” “You make every day worth living.” “I’ll keep you warm.” “I won’t let anyone hurt you, you’re safe with me.” “You look amazing tonight.” “I can’t sleep, can I stay here?” “It’s late. Shouldn’t you be asleep?” “How are you feeling today?” “What’s cookin’ good lookin’?” “Wanna go grab a drink?” “Here, let me help you.” “Kiss me.” “Don’t cry.” “You make me feel safe.” “You’ve shown me what love can feel like.” “Thank you, for everything.” “I wasn’t lying when I said that I loved you.” “Don’t be afraid.” “You’re always on my mind.” “You have no idea how much I want you right now.” “You’ve always felt like home.” “I can’t imagine this world without you.” “Dance with me.” “Why are you crying?” “Who hurt you?” “You make me feel alive.” “I wouldn’t change a thing about you.” “Who cares about what they think?” “Tell me what’s wrong.” “You’ve always got me.” “I’ve waited for this moment for a long time.” “Is this okay?” “You look like you could use a hug.” “Did you need something?” “We’re meant for each other.” “You’re worth it.” “I don’t care what anyone else thinks.” “Do you have a ride home?” “You need sleep.” “We’re meant for each other.” “You’re worth it.” “I don’t care what anyone else thinks.” “Don’t be scared, I’m right here.” “You’re so adorable.” “I’m better, now that you’re here.” “I could never forget you.” “Don’t be scared, I’m right here.” “You’re so adorable.” “Come cuddle.” “Can’t you stay a little longer?” “I fell in love with you, not them.” “You’re the only one I wanna wake up next to.” “I just want this. I want you.” “Don’t you dare throw that snowba-, goddammit!” “Kiss me.” “We’re in the middle of a thunderstorm and you wanna stop and feel the rain?” “I’ve seen the way you look at me when you think I don’t notice.” “Have I entered an alternate universe or did you really just crack a smile for me?” “You did all this for me?” “I wish I could hate you.” “Stop acting like you owe me anything.” “Take my jacket.” “I think you’ll have to make it up to me.” “You braided his hair?” “You’re so cute when you’re upset.” “The power when out. It’s not the end of the world.” “I might be slightly drunk…” “If my day gets any worse I’m asking hell if they’re having an exchange program.” "If I survive, can I go home?” “Stop tickling me before I rip your fingers off.” “If you kill them you’ll have to kill me too because otherwise, I’m going to kill you.” “I missed being with you like this,” “I’ve been excited to see you all day.” “You’re my perfect match,” “No one else can compare to your loveliness,” “I’ll keep you warm. Hold me closer.” “Kiss me again, like you mean it.” “Can I have a massage?” “Move away if you don’t want this kiss.” “Are you my secret admirer, the one that’s been sending me all the flowers and notes?” "You’re supposed to be washing my hair, but this feels more like a massage.” “Hold my hand tight. I’ll protect you.” “Apparently all our friends have a bet going that we end up together. “I’ll never let anyone hurt you, you understand?” “You really think I’m beautiful?” “Are you jealous? That’s cute.” “There’s only a handful of people in this world that I actually like. You may or may not be one of them.” “So–uh, I’m not really good at this, but … I think I like you … like you.” “You seriously need to stop watching sad dog commercials at 3am. You’re an absolute mess; this is ridiculous!” “Hey–don’t you sass me! That’s my job around here!” “If you don’t get away from me with that horrid little creature, I will throat punch you.” “You really have to question me? … So what if I lied? That was one time!” “Oh, God. We broke it–dude, he’s gonna be so pissed! This is all your fault–it was your idea!” “… Is that my underwear?” “I overall hate the human race, but you aren’t too horrible; bearable, at least.” “I didn’t mean to scare you–I thought you’d like being surprised!” “You’re cute, I’ll give you that. But not cute enough to get away with that.” “Look–I hate to tell you, but you deserve the truth… . Your cooking almost killed me last night.” “This is the part where you ask me out and I say yes.” “Really? You made me drive all the way back here just to kill a fucking bug?” “We should get matching tattoos–wouldn’t that be cute?” “Oh, God. We’re one of those couples, aren’t we? Ugh–I hate us!” “I got you something! I remember you mentioning it before … I hope you like it.” “Shut up and kiss me, you idiot.” “I get that you were trying to be romantic, but you nearly burned the house down!” “I may be short, but you could at least try to make kissing you easier!” “I’ve never felt safer than I do in your arms.” “We may be soulmates, but that does not mean you can just waltz in here like you own the place! I could have been naked, or something!” “Oh–this is far from over. I’m going to prank you back so hard you won’t even know what hit you!” “Here–can you put sunscreen on my back for me? Don’t be weird about it!” “I need you. Please, stay.” “Promise me you’ll never leave me. I don’t care if you have to lie.” “Dance with me! C’mon, it’ll be fun!” “Here–let me show you how to hold that thing before you hurt yourself… Like this, see? It’s easy.” “I may love you, but I will kick your ass if you tempt me to.” “Why are you always right? It’s not fair.” “I have no idea what you just said, but I could listen to you all day.” “What? Sorry–I didn’t hear you. I was too busy getting lost in your eyes… Ow! What?! I was just trying to seduce you!” “You know you don’t have to try so hard with me, right?” “Relax–it’s just me! Not an axe murderer, I promise!” “Did you seriously just climb through my window?” “So, I tried making dinner … keyword there is tried. Let’s just say it didn’t end well, so we’re having takeout tonight.” “Yep–no, you’re never touching the laundry again. You ruined my favourite sweater and nearly flooded the house. Never again.” “Hey–I accidentally cut my hand, I think I need to go to the hospital. Can you drive me? … Why are you looking at me like that? There’s not even that much blood!” “I have something to show you; I think you’ll like it.” “I love you. Never forget that, okay?” “You’re so beautiful words can’t even do you justice.” “I want to spend the rest of my life with you, no matter how short or long that is.” “Hey–I’m perfectly average height for my age, thank you very much. You’re the one who’s freakishly tall!” “I’ll catch you–trust me! … So I dropped you one time–we don’t have the time to argue about this!” “I won’t forget just how big of a douche you were, but I may just be able to find it within myself to forgive you.” “Quit stealing all the pillows!” “You want a bite?” “Give me a second and I’ll show you.” “You’ll play this game with me, won’t you?” “What should we name him/her?” “Have you ever played in the rain?” “Is it hot in here or is that just you?” “Why are your feet so cold?” “Ride the Ferris wheel with me?” “There’s room for two/three!” “Stop that, I’m ticklish!” “Put your finger here while I go get the tape.” “Here’s my number!” “You want chocolate or vanilla?” “Your hands are so warm! “Are you sure you’re not tired? Because you’ve been running through my mind all day.” “You’re sweeter than candy.” “You smell really nice.” “Your hair’s so soft…” “You’re my new pillow.” “Can I rub your back?” “If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing?” “I think I love you.” “Can I kiss you?” “Hold my hand.” “It’s not morning yet.” “Stay for a little longer…” “Of course I’m happy! How far along are you?” “You’re so beautiful.” “I’ll always be here for you.” “You are my love.” “You were right here all along.” “Do you want my coat? It’s really cold out here.” “You don’t need keys to drive me crazy.” “Do you want to get dinner sometime?” “Call me whenever… no really.” “You’ve got flour on your cheek.” “Sorry… your hair was in your face… thought I should move it so I could see you better.” “You don’t have to leave so soon.” “You could put your feet in my lap, you know.” “I wouldn’t change a thing about you.” “Shut up and kiss me.” “We’re pregnant!” “Are you science? Because I’ve got my ion you.” “We could try cuddling.” “Stop being so cute.” “Are you okay?” “Our relationship is the most important thing in my life.” “You can sleep, I’ll keep you safe.” “Don’t worry. I’ll take care of everything.” “Do you really need all that candy?” “Exactly how drunk was I?” “Stop being so cute.” “It was a joke, baby. I swear.” “What a nerd.” “Are you ok?” “Can we get a dog?” “Are you kidding me?” “Good morning, sunshine.” “I can’t reach it.” “Dumbass.” “Come cuddle.” “Oh. My. God.” “Stop it! It tickles!” “Stay. Please.” “Why are you even awake right now?” “Is that my shirt you’re wearing?” “How strangely nonchalant for someone who almost just died a minute ago.” “No way.” “You’re such a weakling.” “Just let it all out.” “I’m here, baby.” “I missed you. So much.” “Don’t worry.” “Hey hey hey, look at me.” “Don’t say that.” “You’re so pretty.” “Honestly, you’re the cheesiest person alive.” “Stop staring at me!” “Will you please inform me on why we’re going in here?” “How is this so expensive? For barely any clothing?” “I’m seriously not that drunk.”

A N G S T:

“I love you, please don’t go.” “Please don’t walk out of that door.” “I thought things were going great.” “Don’t you love me?” “I’m never letting you go.” “You meant too much to me.” “I won’t let you.” “How could you ask me that?” “Don’t you trust me?” “Shouldn’t you be with him/her?” “I’ve got you.” “We’ll figure this out.” “This isn’t goodbye.” “What the hell were you thinking?!” “I care about you.” “You could have warned me!” “That was unexpected.” “You haven’t lost me.” “Why are you doing this?” “Please don’t do this.” “All I wanted was for you to be happy.” “I can’t do this on my own.” “Trust me.” “Nothing is wrong with you.” “Let’s go.” “I’m not going anywhere.” “I am home.” “I love you, please don’t go.” “Please don’t walk out of that door.” “I thought things were going great.” “Don’t you love me?” “I’m never letting you go.” “You meant too much to me.” “I won’t let you.” “How could you ask me that?” “Don’t you trust me?” “Shouldn’t you be with him/her?” “I’ve got you.” “We’ll figure this out.” “This isn’t goodbye.” “What the hell were you thinking?!” “I care about you.” “You could have warned me!” “That was unexpected.” “You haven’t lost me.” “Why are you doing this?” “Please don’t do this.” “All I wanted was for you to be happy.” “I can’t do this on my own.” “Trust me.” “Nothing is wrong with you.” “Let’s go.” “I’m not going anywhere.” “I am home. “What happened back there?” “That’s not gonna happen.” “Why me?” “I’m right where I belong.” “Fine.” “What do you want me to say?” “After everything we’ve been through, you still don’t think that I love you?” “You’ve been drinking tonight, haven’t you?” “Excuse me?” “What are you doing?” “What did you expect?” “You’re not alone.” “I’ve always been honest with you.” “Going somewhere?” “Don’t lie to me.” “Forget it.” “That’s in the past.” “I won’t lose you too.” “It’s not that easy.” “I’ve had enough.” “It wasn’t supposed to happen like this.” “Let me go.” “It’s not goodbye. It’s see you later.” “Don’t look at me like that.” You’re the one that left. You turned your back and walked away.” “You need to wake up because I can’t do this without you.” “I waited and waited, but you never came back.” “Were you ever going to tell me?” “You know we’re supposed to be together. I’ve known since the first time I saw you and you know it too.” “Do I get bonus points if I act like I care?” “If you kill them you’ll have to kill me too because otherwise, I’m going to kill you.” “I think we should break up.” “You aren’t who I thought you were.” “I don’t even know who you are anymore!” “Why can’t you look at me?” “What’s wrong?” “You want to be with him/her/them, don’t you?” “You promised you’d change!” “Am I not enough for you?” “What is so wrong with me?” “I’m sick of trying.” “I don’t want to be just friends.” “I can’t trust you anymore.” “I can’t even look at you.” “Your problem isn’t me, your problem is _______” “I’m always wrong, aren’t I?” “You said this time it’d be different.” “Please give me a chance.” “I’m pregnant.” “I wish I’d never laid eyes on you.” “I don’t love you anymore.” “We can’t keep this up forever.” “You make me feel so small.” “Don’t leave me like this!” “Don’t ever call me again.” “Talk to me, please.” “Don’t push me away.” “This is your son/daughter.” “I think I need a break from you.” “I’m sorry.” “I can’t promise you anything.” “It’s better this way.” “The baby… it’s yours.” “After all this time, and you still can’t look me in the eye?” “I can only blame myself.” “I was only pretending.” “It wasn’t your fault.” “This is all because of you!” “I don’t feel the same way.” “Just go!” “Please stay.” “What aren’t you telling me?” “It’s okay, you didn’t know.” “Don’t tell me to keep calm!” “I’m keeping the baby, with or without you.” “I need to be alone.” “Stop calling me.” “I can’t remember why I ever loved you.” “Don’t apologize; I know you don’t mean it.” “I can’t believe what you’ve done.” “I don’t need you, I’m fine on my own.” “For how many hours did you sleep last night?” “I’m sorry.” “It’s all your fault!” “Get out of my sight!” “God, you’re so annoying.” “I hate you.” “Apparently, in your eyes, I’m always wrong!” “Just listen to me!” “Please.” “What the fuck were you thinking?” “Cut the bullshit.” “Why are you here?” “I miss you.” “Would you for once! Stop being a bitch!” “I don’t care!” “Don’t fucking touch me.” “We can’t keep doing this. I can’t keep doing this.” “And I thought there was a spark between us.” “Leave.” “I was wrong.” “Are you ok?” “Are you going to talk to me?” “Wanna talk?”

S M U T:

“I love it when you moan my name.” “You got started without me.” “Just a little harder…” “Gimme a taste…” “Let me give you a reason to stay in bed.” “Grab the headboard for me, will ya?” “No panties?” “I want you now.” “Use your tongue.” “Please don’t stop.” “Do you like that?” “Let’s put that mouth to good use…” “Let me help you forget that jerk…” “You can get louder, can’t you?” “Look what you do to me.” “I want to taste you.” “That feels so good.” “Don’t cum yet…” “Take off your clothes.” “I could use a hand…” “Take off your clothes. Slowly.” “Can you feel what you’re doing to me?” “Shhhh…” “You sound as if you like my teasing?” “Watch me until I say you can join in…” “There’s only one rule. You can’t use your hands.” “Look deep into my eyes, sweetheart.” “I want you to leave marks.” “I want to watch you fall apart.” “I dreamed of you all night.” “Face down on the bed. Now.” “Don’t apologize about your morning wood.” “Fuck me like you mean it.” “Spank me.” “Take me now.” “Tell me how you like it.” “I just want to please you.” “Tell me I’m a good boy/girl/lover.” “Let me watch you touch yourself.” “Each of my thoughts about you are improper.” “Use your teeth.” “I love it when you kiss my neck.” “Don’t be gentle.” “I’ve never wanted anyone this badly before.” “You’re not going out dressed like that.” “Make me.” “All mine.” “Please make it rough.” “I love it when you talk dirty.” “I’ll let you do anything if you’ll just touch me now.” “You’re so fucking hot when you’re mad.” “Strip.” “You’ve been so bad, haven’t you, baby?” “Make me.” “Hurry up!” “Don’t leave any marks.” “You look so hot I could fuck you senseless right now.” “Behave.” “Such a good girl.” “Don’t stop.” “You aren’t too bad yourself, baby.” “That feel good, princess?” “Be patient for me.” “Do you think you deserve my dick tonight?” “Wider, baby. I said wider.” “Fuck, baby you’re so tight” “So good, baby, so sweet.” “P-please s-s-stop.” “I can’t hear you.” “Don’t make a sound.” “I dare you.” “Stay still for me, princess.” “Tell me what you want.” “Swallow.” “On your knees.” “So fucking pretty.” “You’re such a hoe. Such a slut for me.” “Mine. Only mine.” “You can’t cum until I say so.” “Cum for me, baby.” “You taste so sweet, honey.” “Choke me.” “You’re drooling. You really don’t deserve it though, do you?” “I’m going to remind you exactly who you belong to.” “Try to stay quiet for me. Can you do that?” “Spread your legs. I want to feel how turned on I made you.” “You can add another finger. I’m ready,” “I want to watch you take off your clothes.” “You’re so turned on already? That was fast,” “Lay back and touch yourself. I want to watch.” “You want to do this right now? Even though we could get caught?” “You’re nipples are so sensitive today,” “Do you want to continue this in the shower?” “You look so beautiful tied up to my bed,” “I want you to be rough with me, please leave marks on my skin,” “Say my name,” “Louder,” “You say you want me, but your body seems to like it when I tease you,” “Call me ‘Sir’ when we’re alone like this,” “No, I’m the one that’s supposed to be making you feel good,” “Don’t stop, whatever you do. I like that, a lot.” “I love hearing you moan,” “Blindfolds heighten your senses, maybe that’s why you’re whimpering louder than usual.” “I was wondering how long you two were going to make out like that before you realise you weren’t alone.” “Sorry, did that hurt?” “No, I’m just a little sore from last night.” “I want to hear you beg for it.” “I’m not wearing any panties,” “I want to kiss every inch of your body before I fuck you,” “I don’t have the patience to remove your clothes right now,” “Your pussy tastes so sweet,” “I can’t wait until we’re alone. There are so many things I want to do to you right now.” “Bite me,” “Where?” “Were you just touching yourself?” “The game is, either of us is only allowed to touch the other with their mouth.” “I love how your body loses control when you cum.” “Fuck me like a starved animal or leave.” “Show me how you like to be touched.” “Harder, Deeper…” “I want to fulfill that fantasy you’ve always wanted.” “The way you smile like that always turns me on,” “Can I at least shut the door before you decide to pounce on me the moment I come home,” “I know you said you didn’t want to be late, but you look amazing, and I’m trying not to kiss you senseless right now,”

[ Sorry if some are double]

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annesanquish · 7 years ago

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I heard you're lookin for prompts... i love love your writing... all your camp camp fics are honestly making my LIFE rn. would you have any interest in writing a sickfic with david? maybe smthing where he takes max out on the 'no technology' trip he went on as a kid and spikes a SUPER deliriously high fever?? and max is pissed like "why didn't you bring a phone" and david is like "i figured if something happened to you i could carry you" but he didn't see HIMSELF needing help. i just lov angst

I would like to thank @patchettwalsh-blog for finding the information about smoke signals for me. Writing club presidents are the best TBH. Also this is unedited because my beta isn’t home right now.

I hope I captured the angst. It ended up being fluffy a bit towards the middle? I kinda butchered the prompt because I was taking a state test while writing it so I didn’t have the full prompt in front of me, I’m so sorry I failed you my follower. Thank you for the prompt though, I actually had something to do with my life ^^

“David, are you sure this is a good idea?” Gwen asked as David rubbed sunscreen onto the back of his neck. David looked at her with a frown, ignoring the pink flush that dusted his cheeks.

“It’ll be fine, Gwen. It’s just a hike. We’ll be back before lunch.”

“You said that last time you went on a hike without me, and you didn’t fucking come back until after dinner.”

David mumbled a soft reprimand at Gwen’s language, wrapping his scarf around his neck and tying it. “I won’t be alone this time. I’ll have Max, remember?”

“I still don’t understand your obsession with the kid…” She muttered as she followed him towards the door of the cabin.

“I just want him to understand how great Camp Campbell really is, and I think this is the best way to do it.”

“Or you’ll get yourselves lost, and killed.”

He punched her shoulder lightly. “Don’t be like that. We won’t get lost.”

“Whatever you say, David.” She patted his back lightly before trudging on out into the daylight. David followed shortly, a slight skip in his step.

“Good morning, Max!” He chirped when they reached where most of the kids were sitting at the fire circle.

Max looked up from where he and Nikki were stacking rocks in preparation for something David was glad he was missing, and scowled. “What is it, Camp Man?”

“You and I are going on a hike today!”

“Oh. Right.” He rolled his eyes and went back to gathering stones. “Yeah, I thought about it last night, and I decided I’m not going on one of your shitty hikes.”

“I”m afraid you don’t have much of a choice in the matter, Max,” David said, putting his hands on his hips.

“Goddammit,” Max muttered. “Fine. Whatever. I’ll go with you, if it’ll get you to leave me the fuck alone about it.”

“That’s the spirit!” David cheered. “Now come on.” He walked towards one of the trail heads, and Max scowled as he grabbed his water bottle off of the end of his cot and followed the uncharacteristically optimistic counselor.

Once they got into the woods and away from the camp, David seemed to calm down a bit. He took a deep breath, and let it out, face falling into a relaxed smile. “You smell that Max?”

“No.”

“That’s the scent of fresh pine. Gosh, I’ve been coming to this camp for years, and I still never get tired of it.”

“You don’t get tired of anything, fuckface.”

David chose to make no comment on this. “Now. I just want you to be aware that this hike I’m taking you on is the exact same hike that made me fall in love with Camp Campbell.”

“You mean the one where you got lost?”

“The exact same! Although I have the trail memorized, so we won’t have as much trouble as Mister Campbell did back then.”

“Uh huh.” Max didn’t sound convinced.

“So I hope you left your compass at the tent, because using it would be against the rules.”

Max felt his heart drop to his stomach, and he subconsciously sped up to fall in line behind David. He wasn’t quite sure why, but he supposed it was the prospect of being alone in the woods without technology that put him on edge. If asked though, he would deny any questions about moving within the counselor’s arm reach of his own free will.

The longer the hike went on, the more tired David seemed to get, and this concerned Max. It had been obvious something had been wrong by how sunburned David’s cheeks looked at the camp this morning- the dude was religious about putting on sunscreen- but it hadn’t occurred to Max until they were well over an hour away from the camp that something could be seriously wrong.

It wasn’t until David was walking slower than the camper that Max decided to pipe up about the issue.

“Hey, moron.” Max stopped in the middle of the path to turn and look at him with a scowl. “Why are you going so slow.”

David was panting, and his face was definitely more flushed than when they’d started. Max frowned. “I’m fine.. Max.” He leaned against a tree carefully. ‘Just a… bit out of breath. The thin air, and all… you know how it is.”

“I can’t say that I do. You’re /David/, for fucks sake. You never get winded.”

David let out a short, breathless laugh, before slumping against the tree, body threatening to collapse as his knees buckled underneath him. Max felt a rush of adrenaline and he was suddenly at David’s side, holding his arm and helping him sit down on the ground carefully. His skin was hot to the touch, and Max furrowed his brow. Once David was situated and catching his breath, Max reached up and pressed his hand to David’s forehead.

It was slick with sweat, and hot to the touch, and Max pulled away as if having been burned. “Do you have a fever?”

David let out a short breath, as if trying to laugh but not having the energy to, and shrugged. “Didn’t check.”

Max cursed, and pulled his water bottle out of his pocket, thrusting it into David’s hand. “Here. Drink.”

David looked at it, and frowned. “Max-”

“Right now, you need it more than I do.” Max averted eye contact as David took the bottle and unscrewed it carefully.

Max stood up, and paced along the path in front of David, who watched as he took controlled sips of the lukewarm water.

“Max-” David tried to say, but he was cut off.

“Just shut up a second, will you?” Max snapped as he wracked his brain, trying to come up with a way to fix the predicament they had currently found themselves in.

“You didn’t bring your phone, did you.” Max turned to him accusingly.

“… no…” There was a hint of shame in David’s voice. “It was supposed to be a technology-free hike, Max. I wasn’t going to break the camp rule.”

“You didn’t even consider bending it? Just to avoid being stuck in an emergency situation like this, and not have any fucking way out of it?!”

He didn’t answer, and Max ran his hands through his hair, resuming his pacing. “We can try walking back, but it’s an hour and a half, and you might pass out on the way.”

David nodded along to Max’s thinking, but his words were drowned out by the increased ringing in his ears and his head sagged.

“…vid! David, wake up!”

David jerked awake and looked up at where Max’s face- or, what he assumed that blur was- was visible against the stark blue sky. He frowned, trying to focus his vision but failing miserably. He felt like he was floating.

“Fuck, David, what the hell?”

David let out a noise from the back of his throat, tongue heavy in his mouth, and Max disappeared. He sighed and closed his eyes, before hearing Max’s voice again.

“Open your mouth.”

He frowned and opened his eyes slightly as he obeyed. Max dripped some of the water into his mouth, and David swallowed a few mouthfuls before reaching up and pushing Max away groggily.

Max sighed and capped the water bottle, resting it on the ground next to David before sitting back on his knees. “Dammit…” He muttered, tugging at his sleeves nervously. David looked like he was about to dip into sleep again, so Max shook his shoulder.

“Don’t fucking fall asleep on me again,” he scolded, voice shaking as his heart pounded in his ears. David frowned, but opened his eyes a bit. He looked at Max, eyes glassy and unfocused, and Max tried to ignore the concern eating away at his stomach. He wasn’t sure what to do in this situation, but he didn’t…

Unless…

He leapt up off the ground and set about gathering kindling and leaves from the forest floor, stacking them in a pile in the middle of the pathway. He frequently had to shake David’s shoulder to make sure he stayed awake, but he did, and that was the one thing that kept Max hoping his plan would work.

He pulled his hoodie off over his head and drenched it in a good portion of what was left of the water bottle. He wanted to save a bit for David while they waited. After that, he dug a lighter out of his jeans pocket (because why wouldn’t he just carry around a lighter wherever he went) and activated it, before lighting the small pile of kindling on fire.

He glanced at David, his stomach dropping when he saw David close his eyes, and swallowed, hoping this worked. He turned back to the fire as black smoke crept into the air.

“Three for an emergency…” he muttered to himself, and he watched the smoke snake its way into the sky, before throwing his drenched hoodie over the pitiful fire. He waited a few seconds, and then took it off, letting the smoke creep into the sky again. He repeated this twice, and then kicked dirt on the fire to put it out.

He abandoned his wet and smokey hoodie on the ground as he hurried over to David’s side, pressing his hand to David’s forehead again. It was no longer sweaty, but dry, and scarily warm. Max swallowed past the lump that had formed in his throat as he shook David’s shoulder softly.

David just barely stirred, and Max coaxed the last bit of the water bottle past his lips, before pushing David further into the shade of the forest, ignoring how his hands were shaking.

All that was left to do was wait.

#camp camp #david #max #sickfic #fever #delerium #smoke signals #camping #relatively factual #heat stroke maybe?#writing #fanfiction #prompt

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kafeuka · 4 years ago

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[1/1] similar names and coffee breath

Taehyung really, really, really hate coffee. Obviously it was the barista that made him keep coming back for more.

(alternatively: Taehyung can't function when Yoongi's around) read on AO3

i. americano It was not Taehyung’s intention to order the most disgusting thing in the menu. He could only blame it on the atrociously adorable barista behind the counter. How dare he look all cute and pretty so early in the goddamn morning. How dare he look so disgustingly adorable and stole all Taehyung’s focus away. Taehyung was already late to class and yet, his feet made their way to a cafè rather than college. It was astonishing how all the alarms he had set on his phone were not able to wake him from his slumber. He had been eyeing the new cafè for a while, excited that there was finally a cafè just right around the corner. It was wedged between the flower shop and bookstore, its brick wall design stood out amongst the plain-coloured walls of the other stores. He would have walked past it, but the strong aroma of chocolate lured him in and before he knew it, he found himself standing inside the cafè. On his left side, the walls were painted with chalkboard paint, and there was a small basket hung on the corner, filled with white chalks. The writings on the wall varied; mostly there were quotes, but Taehyung’s favourite had to be the drawing of doraemon. The opposite side, however, the brown-coloured wall was filled with vintage framed photos, which reminded Taehyung of his grandmother’s house — comfortable and cosy. He was three people away from his turn when his phone vibrated. Even before he checked, he already knew that it was Jeongguk. With a sigh, he answered. “Hello?” “Oh, good, you’re awake.” “Dude, you’re supposed to wake me up half an hour ago. I didn’t even get to put on sunscreen, for fuck’s sake.” “Sorry.” At least he had the decency to pretend to sound bashful. “Are you still on your way here? And why did I hear Troye Sivan? Where are you?” “I’m at the new cafè I told you about—” “Cafè? You’re already forty minutes late—” “I can’t help it, okay.” Taehyung moved forward. Only two more people to go. “You know how weak I am for chocolate... and I feel like treating myself today!” “Get me one too! I’d like it cold, please. Thank you, hyung.” “You brat— what makes you think I’d get it for you?” “I said hyung, that should be enough. I have to go now, I’ll be at the student lounge, waiting for my chocolate drink! Bye, Tae!” “Son of a—” Taehyung pulled the phone away from his ear before staring incredulously at his phone screen after Jeongguk hung up abruptly. “What a brat,” Taehyung muttered, shoving his phone into the pocket of his coat. When it was his turn, he did not expect his eyes to be blessed by such a heavenly being dressed in a white button up, the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, topped with a black apron. Taehyung was aware how dumb he must have probably looked right now: mouth slightly open, eyes wide and back slouched. “Welcome to A Cup of Joy. What can I get you today?” His voice was a bit raspy, sounding as if he had just woken from a nap and Taehyung had never listened to anything sexier. 50 Shades of Grey, who? Taehyung was not one to stutter, but man did this guy’s beauty stunned him. How was it possible to wear such dull apron and still look so good? “Sir...?” He jolted at the voice that shook him out of his daydream. Sexy had an eyebrow raised, one hand holding onto a sharpie marker while the other was ready to grab a cup. Up until now, Taehyung did not know the reason for his sudden outburst. “Americano! Two americano!” After a while, he swallowed and added with a whisper, “... please.” “O...kay. Which size would you like?” “Medium?” He winced at how his answer sounded more like a question. Can he embarrass himself even more after this? Of course, he can. While he was narrowing his eyes, trying to read the name on the small nametag on Sexy’s chest, Sexy was scrawling Taehyung’s order on the cups. God, Taehyung exasperatedly thought, he would love to have a lengthy chat with the idiot who created such small nametags. “Your name, Sir?” What the heck was that? Yeonhee? Yoonri? Yonki? “Sir?” For the second time in a span of less than five minutes, Taehyung felt as if he was slapped to be brought back to Earth. Sexy had his eyebrow raised again, his almond eyes staring at Taehyung with curiosity. “Ah, Yoongi,” Taehyung blurted out, almost smiling when he could finally get the name right. It was not his intention to suddenly call out his name like that, but man it was such a relief that Taehyung was able to read the letters on that cursed nametag. Though, it took him a few seconds later to realise what his big mouth had done when his brain chose to replay the word he had accidentally uttered aloud. He saw Yoongi’s eyes widened, before they formed half-moons and his cherry lips stretched into a grin, showcasing his adorable, small teeth. Yoongi chuckled, shaking his head slightly as he scribbled Taehyung’s name on the cups. “We share the same name,” Yoongi grinned. “What are the odds?” Taehyung let out a weak, nervous laughter. “Haha... yeah.” It was only their first meeting and Taehyung was already lying to the man. It was not like him to embarrass himself in front of stranger, much less become a mess. There was only one explanation for this unnatural event: witchcraft. This Yoongi guy definitely knew magic. (Or, Yoongi was extremely attractive and most definitely was Taehyung’s type) (They barely interacted, but Yoongi’s voice was absolutely Taehyung’s type) (And also his face. God, his cute, cute face) (Or maybe, Taehyung was just unable to control himself in front of attractive strangers) Taehyung swallowed before opening his mouth to speak, to explain to the barista that it was a misunderstanding but only to abruptly clamp his lips shut when Yoongi gave him a small-but-capable-of-stopping-hearts smile. “I’ll call our name out when your orders done.” God, Taehyung prayed, have mercy on my weak, weak heart. (When Taehyung took a sip of the americano, he had pulled away so fast that his head spun. Without even thinking twice, he threw it into the nearest bin, wondering why on earth would anybody willingly consume such monstrosity. If sin had a taste, that would be it. Though, he did enjoy the painful expression on Jeongguk’s face when the boy drank the coffee.) ii. cold foam iced espresso Taehyung’s second visit to the cafè was on a Sunday afternoon. He had an essay due tomorrow and as per usual, despite the two weeks duration he was given to complete it, he decided to fuck around, wait until the last minute and stress over it at midnight. Thankfully, he had done his research and reading beforehand, so all he needed was a quiet area to work at and the right headspace to open his microsoft word to write. He was sat on the floor of the living room, finally ready to write the Best Last Minute Essay to Ever Be Written after preparing for half an hour. (By preparing, he meant having the sudden urge to whip out the vacuum and clean the entire floor before mopping the tiles. When that was done, he proceeded to spray the living room with his current favourite scent— Ocean Escape) His laptop made a sound indicating it was starting up. Cracking his neck, he was determined to finish the essay when— “Babe, that tickles!” Taehyung frowned. “Taehyung’s outside, he’ll hear us!” “I have that ball gag, remember? Just in case you change your mind—” “Okay, that’s it,” Taehyung groaned, eyebrows furrowing as he scooped his items and brought them close to his chest. “I am LEAVING,” he purposely said it aloud with his lower lip jutting, stomping his feet petulantly with every step he took. He ran back to his apartment a few seconds after, cursing himself for forgetting to lock the door in his room before scrambling back to leave. And that was how he found himself staring at a pair of beautiful, feline eyes. He berated himself for entering the cafè after making a promise with himself to never step foot inside of it ever again. He did not want to be a regular with the fake name. His only chance to not humiliate himself was to enter the cafè on Yoongi’s day off. He should have known that luck was never really on his side when he saw Yoongi the moment he opened the door. Taehyung had spotted rows of pastries on display, the smell of freshly baked croissants tempting him to stay. There was not a line at the counter, and there were at least three people behind it whom Taehyung surmised was making the customers’ orders, which made Taehyung hope that at least one of them would serve him instead of Yoongi. Taehyung fought the urge to let out an inhuman scream when it was Yoongi who turned around and gave him a smile. “Hey, Yoongi.” “Aha, yeah.” Taehyung rubbed the back of his neck, almost forgetting that his name was also Yoongi in this cafè. “What can I get you today?” “Well, um...” he moved closer to inspect the menu. A croissant was most definitely in the list, maybe he’d take a slice of hazelnut chocolate cake too. But as for a drink... “May I recommend something for you today?” “Huh? Oh yeah, yeah, sure.” With his sharpie, Yoongi pointed on a name of a beverage on the laminated menu. “I’d suggest a cold foam espresso for this warm day. It’s my favourite. I see that you have your laptop and a file with you. I reckon you’ll be staying, yeah?” “Yeah. Yeah, I am.” Taehyung loved hearing him talk. He could not put his finger on it, but there was just something in the way he drawled, how the words just roll so effortlessly on his tongue, yet he spoke rather eloquently. He still had that morning sexy voice going on though, so that was a bonus. “So, what do you say to that?” And how can Taehyung said no to Yoongi? Once his drink arrived, it did not look so bad. In fact, it looked mouth-watering. Especially the frothy, creamy foam. Yoongi had specially delivered Taehyung’s orders to his table, placing each item carefully with just one hand. “Enjoy. And good luck with your assignment,” Yoongi smiled. Taehyung’s heart skipped a beat, a flush making its way to his cheeks. Little did Yoongi know, he was not only serving Taehyung pastries, but also his smile. (And fuck, only God knows how much Taehyung wanted to chuck the stupid drink out of the window. How can something that look so good taste so crappy? He stirred everything together, the blended beverage turned from black and white to form a beautiful beige colour and though it tasted a little less bitter than before, he still hated it and would much rather wash his tongue with a rock than took another sip. But Yoongi was right there, and whenever he stole glances at Yoongi, the guy seemed to caught him doing so and always responded in the same way; a nod and a small smile. Every single time he saw that smile, he plucked up his courage to take another sip and every single time he did, he died a little more on the inside. This led him to getting a few more pastries and an overpriced bottle of water to get rid of the horrible taste. The good thing was that he managed to finish his essay in two hours time, motivated to leave the cafè so he had a reason why his drink was left half empty. Of course, he ended up finishing the whole cursed thing. He had to refrain himself from gagging when he was done. He was more relief to see the glass empty than seeing his essay completed. But boy oh boy was he glad he did it. Yoongi was the one who approached him when he was packing up, still wearing that shy small smile on his face when he picked up the glass and plates. “I’m glad you loved it,” he said. “It’s great, Yoongi,” Taehyung lied, hoping his smile would be able to conceal the pain he was feeling inside. “Have you finished your essay?” “Yes, I have. It’s all thanks to you and the... uh, whatever that drink was.” At least this one was not a lie. Yoongi’s gaze shifted on the tray he was holding as Taehyung saw red spots were flaring on his cheeks. Taehyung was certain the sight in front of him was making him blush too. ‘Fuck!’ Taehyung screamed inside his head. ‘Why am I so weak?’ “I’m gonna...” Yoongi motioned to his tray. “Oh, yeah, yeah!” “See you soon... I hope?” Taehyung could not contain the excitement that was crawling under his skin, giddy to hear those words coming out of Yoongi’s mouth. He hoped he did not look overexcited when he frivolously nodded. Yoongi mirrored his action, although his was just a curt nod, before returning to his work station. When he left, however, he only had one thought in his head: “ah, fuck.”) iii. macchiato caramel At this point, Taehyung should have known that he was not fond of coffee. He hated the bitter taste, how it felt as if his tongue was burnt and how it effortlessly made him pull a hideous face. Plus, consuming a cup of coffee can fuck up his sleeping schedule and he hated missing a good sleep. Yet, when he arrived at A Cup of Joy, promising himself to get only a pastry or two, his knees wobbled slightly at the sight of Yoongi. At a certain angle when the sunlight hit, Taehyung noticed the barista’s hair was now a darker shade of brown rather than jet black. It was not a busy day, there was not a queue though there were some customers already seated at the tables. Shoving his fists inside the pocket of his jacket, Taehyung made his way to the counter, repeatedly rehearsing his order in his head. Yoongi greeted him with a smile, one that made the angels sing a new symphony and devils blinded by his beauty. “Hiya. Fancy seeing you here again,” Yoongi grinned, already taking the medium-sized cup— a sign that he remembered Taehyung’s usual order. Taehyung was a Large guy, he always went for large, but he was not going to gulp down large-sized coffee. “Fancy seeing you too,” Taehyung beamed. “I suppose you’d like to try anything new today? We’ve got something new brewing in the kitchen, my special recipe, but they’re not on the board yet,” Yoongi explained, not meeting Taehyung’s eyes when the pink hue were visible on his cheeks. A part of Taehyung was ready to break up the promise he made with himself, but Taehyung had a superb control over himself. He opened his lips to speak, but when Yoongi spoke again, he found himself swallowing. “I can make it for you if you’d like. Promise it’s sweet,” Yoongi added, his eyes were softening. “YOU’RE the SWEET one here!” Taehyung wanted to yell, but he settled with a nod instead, already welcoming the possibility of not sleeping until the sun rise. However, he did not regret his decision at all because it made Yoongi’s eyes sparkled and his lips curved into a smile that showcased his gums and small teeth and god, Taehyung had to bite his lower lip to prevent himself from screeching. He wanted to bang his head against the marble countertop and sobbed about how adorable Yoongi was being. Somehow, amidst his brain went into chaos mode, he managed to order a bagel and a chocolate muffin while keeping his voice stable. He purposely chose a seat that was facing the glass window so Yoongi would not be able to see the face he made when he drank Satan’s Piss. It was not his intention to stay, but he might as well as he had just purchased a book from the bookstores a few streets away. He was on the eleventh page when Yoongi arrived, carrying a tray of his pastries and drink to his table. Taehyung placed an index finger in between the pages before he closed them to look up at Yoongi to thank him. Yoongi’s movement were swift yet careful as he placed them one by one. “Oh! Are you reading Good Omens?” “Huh? Oh, yeah, yeah. Have you read it before?” Yoongi nodded, bringing the brown tray close to him. “One of my favourites, actually. You’ll love it.” Taehyung grinned. “I already do.” “Happy reading, then. And, um, enjoy your food, Yoongi.” Ah, shit. Taehyung had nearly forgotten that they ‘shared’ the same name here. “Thanks, Yoongi,” Taehyung replied, silently praying that his smile did not come off as pained. As for the drink, it was served in a tall glass, milk on the bottom topped with coffee of a beautiful brown colour that matched Taehyung’s coat. There were drizzles of caramel on top that had dripped down the glass. Taehyung wiped it with his index finger in an upward motion before bringing it to his lips. The caramel was not as sweet as Taehyung anticipated, but it tasted just right. He stirred the beverage, muttering a prayer underneath his breath for strength. “Oh,” he muttered after he took a sip. It was not bad at all. He assumed it was the milk; seeing that there was more milk than the brown thingy he surmised was coffee. He did taste a bit of coffee, but the taste of milk and caramel must have overpowered it for the drink to be this bearable. Taehyung did not hate it at all, in fact he actually enjoyed it. Without realizing, he was already finished reading one quarter of the book when the glass was empty. Just as he turned to the next page, Yoongi approached him again, surprising him with his sudden presence. “How was it?” Yoongi asked, his hands grabbing the empty plates to place them on the tray before he took out the towel from his back pocket. “Not bad at all,” Taehyung answered, making a mental note of the number of page he had stopped reading. He turned his body towards Yoongi, an arm resting on the table while the other on top of the chair. “It is sweet.” ‘Just like you,’ Taehyung added in his head. “Too sweet?” “Just-right-sweet.” “Do you like it?” Yoongi stopped what he was doing to look at Taehyung, anticipating the curly-haired man’s answer. Taehyung’s lips tugged into a small smile, his heart swelling when he spotted the pink on Yoongi’s cheeks. “I do,” he genuinely said, probably the only thing he had said to Yoongi that was not a lie. He saw the way Yoongi’s lips curved into a smile so big his gums were visible, and the sight nearly made Taehyung’s heart jump out of his chest at how effortlessly pretty Yoongi was being. “I’ll make you something else someday. I know you’d love it too.” “Promise?” “Promise.” iv. iced white chocolate mocha On Taehyung’s next visit, it was a bit crowded. Waiting for his turn while queuing, he counted the available seats in his head and bit his lower lip when he saw that there were only four seats available. He contemplated in staying seeing that he had left his work at home and his phone was on low battery— all signs pointing to No, He Should Not Stay. Besides, there was only one reason why he should stay and the Reason was behind the counter, taking orders from a hipster with a thick beige scarf wrapped around his neck. Sighing, he texted Jeongguk to come over to the cafè to bring him notes he’d left on his table. Five minutes later, there was only one person left before it was Taehyung’s turn when all of a sudden he heard his name being called loudly from behind. “Taehyung? Taehyung hyung!” Taehyung blinked, his eyes looking up to see Yoongi had a confusion look on his face as his gaze was at, Taehyung assumed, the source of the voice. It finally dawned to Taehyung that Yoongi did not know his real name and that he was lying the entire name, and at the thought of Yoongi never speaking to him ever again made him swallow. Slowly, he turned towards the familiar voice to find Jeongguk already making his way towards him, his hand carrying his blue file. Shit, Taehyung thought. “Next, please.” Taehyung moved forward, lower lip bitten by his front teeth. Yoongi’s lips were pressed in a straight line, eyebrows arching. Jeongguk put a hand on Taehyung’s shoulder before thrusting the file to him. “Here ya go, hyung. You better treat me to something tasty for making me run here!” “Er...” “Taehyung, is it?” Yoongi asked, not an ounce of anger in his voice. “Yeah.” Taehyung weakly huffed, his fingers were clumsy under Yoongi’s questioning stare that he nearly dropped his file. “Whatever he’s having, make it two,” Jeongguk grinned, cheekily holding up his index and middle fingers to show the number two. “I, well, uh—” “Hyung, I’ll go sit first, yeah?” When Jeongguk left, Taehyung could only tap his finger against the counter, his eyes glued to the menu on top of it although he practically had memorised everything at this point. There was an awkward silence between them that was suffocating Taehyung. If a piano were to fall from the sky and crush Taehyung, it would still hurt less than having to be in this situation. Damn him and his big mouth. Thankfully, it was Yoongi who broke the silence. “Uh... so... why don’t you take a seat and I’ll get you the thing I promised?” “Yeah.” Taehyung swallowed, his hand making its way to rub on his nape. He almost forgot that Yoongi made him a promise. How could Yoongi still remember something like that? Wasn’t he supposed to be angry that Taehyung lied? “So... should I address this to Taehyung or Yoongi?” There was a lilt in his voice, no malicious intent present, only a small smile playing on his lips. Relief washed over Taehyung and he found himself leaning forward, one hand on the counter for support as he let out a chuckle. “Taehyung. To Taehyung, please.” “Okay, Taehyung. I’ll get you your drinks in a bit yeah. Two, right?” “Yep.” “God... what the fuck is wrong with you?” Jeongguk glared at Taehyung, reeling his head back with a look of disgust present on his face. Taehyung was a tad bit offended, but really, it was his fault so he understood what it must have looked like to Jeongguk. He himself did not understand why he did not correct Yoongi the first time. “Have you seen how cute he was?” Taehyung whispered, leaning forward towards Jeongguk. “It’s like my brain suddenly becomes a mush around him, I hate it.” “You have a crush on him, huh.” Jeongguk had his shit-eating grin on his face as he leaned back against his chair and crossed his arms. Taehyung rolled his eyes, as if that was not obvious enough. Initially, he did not want to tell Jeongguk at first, but he could no longer keep this secret by himself that his heart threatened to burst if he did not let it out. “I can’t believe you let him believe you guys shared the same name. You’re a monster.” “Oi.” “Hey,” Yoongi murmured, appearing by their side with their drinks. Taehyung abruptly straightened up in his seat, trying to contain the grin that was attempting to take over his face. “Two iced white chocolate mocha,” Yoongi stated as he placed the beverages in front of Taehyung and Jeongguk. “Mocha?” Jeongguk questioned. “Is that some type of coffee? But hyung, you don’t—“ “AND thank you, Yoongi,” Taehyung interjected, his foot kicking Jeongguk’s shin underneath the table. “Ow!” Jeongguk yelped, his sudden movement made the table rattle. Good thing Taehyung’s fast reflex stopped the glasses from toppling. “Oh?” Yoongi raised an eyebrow at Taehyung. “We’ll drink it deliciously. Thank you,” Taehyung smiled. “Well then. Enjoy your drinks.” (Taehyung did not dare to look at anywhere else but Jeongguk’s face the whole time he was there. The drink was marvellous, and Taehyung especially loved the whipped cream. He would usually try to grab Yoongi’s attention and made eye contact before he leave, but he was too embarrassed to do so. Jeongguk, on the other hand, tried to humiliate Taehyung even further by waving vigorously at Yoongi, at which, Yoongi waved back uncertainly with a baffled look on his face. Taehyung had to practically drag Jeongguk out of the cafè, his face was redder than the ‘open’ sign at the door as he tried his hardest to not glance at Yoongi’s direction.) v. strawberry milkshake Taehyung avoided going to the cafè for weeks. He had a few tests to sit for, and he still had not overcome the humiliation of getting caught lying to Yoongi. He should have apologised properly, but he could not bring himself to step a foot inside the cafè. When he finally did, it was nearly closing time on a Thursday. They met at the entrance, Yoongi on the other side of the glass door, fingers holding the opening sign, ready to switch it over while Taehyung was still on the outside, wide eyes staring back at Yoongi. Yoongi’s hair was a lighter shade of brown now and he was still wearing the apron. Taehyung did not realise that there was another person besides Yoongi in the cafè until Yoongi called out her name, giving her permission to go back to the kitchen but his eyes were never leaving Taehyung’s face. The staring contest went on for another ten seconds, with Taehyung the first one to blink, before Yoongi flipped over the sign so it now read ‘closed’. He opened the door, not bothering to hide the surprise on his face. Taehyung let out a breathless, “Hi,” sounding as if he had just ran a marathon. “Hi,” Yoongi replied back. “What are you—” “I’m sorry I lied,” Taehyung murmured. “It wasn’t my intention to, but you made me so nervous. I knew I should have corrected myself the first time. It was wrong of me to let it go on.” “Oh.” “And I hate coffee. I really do. Americano? Worst thing my tongue had ever tasted. Never again. I’d rather cut off my tongue than to ever taste one drop of hell. The espresso? Hate that too. The macchiato caramel was good though, tolerable and sweet. I could barely taste the coffee and the white chocolate mocha? That one was good too.” Taehyung was rambling with his hands doing random motions, something he did when he got nervous. Yoongi only watched him as he spoke, one hand still holding the door handle. When Taehyung was done, he had to take a deep breath before adding, “And I understand if you never want to see me again. I’m a terrible person.” Yoongi blinked twice before letting out a guffaw, his heart soaring. “Taehyung, I know you hate coffee. It shows when you had that espresso. It was why I gave you something sweeter the next time you visited,” Yoongi explained, his eyes forming crescents and Taehyung thought the moon must be envious that it would never be as beautiful as Yoongi. Taehyung’s face felt warmer when Yoongi revealed that he knew all along. “Oh, okay.” “But why do I make you so nervous? Was it my face? I was often told that I look intimidating. This is the first time someone tells me straight to my face, though.” “No, you are very cute, that’s why—” “Oh.” “I mean- I mean—” “Wow, okay, thank you, I don’t think—” “Are you kidding? You are so pretty— wait, what am I—” “P-pretty?” Both of them had to turn away from each other, flustered by what the other was saying as the pink hues appearing on their cheeks only become more darker as time passed by. “Would you—“ Yoongi cleared his throat, opening the door a little wider before repeating, voice much clearer this time, “Would you like to come in?” “But it’s closing time.” “I won’t tell the boss if you won’t.” Taehyung was sweating. Very, very terribly. Maybe it was because the air conditioner was turned off due to cleaning and Yoongi just switched it on when Taehyung stepped inside. Or maybe it was because of the fact that in this empty cafe, there was only him and the guy whose lately had been residing in his mind. He fiddled with his fingers, often turning around to watch people passing outside, the red ‘open’ sign on the window was facing him and no matter how much he wanted to stop feeling nervous, he could not help tapping his foot on the floor. He glanced at Yoongi’s backside, even without seeing his (cute, adorable, pretty) face, Taehyung could tell how concentrated he was when making the beverages. His movements were swift, hands reaching out to the items without having his head to look up, probably had a map in his head that showed where all the stuff were. Taehyung turned away as fast as lightning when Yoongi faced him, pretending as if he had not been staring at Yoongi like the creep he was. When Yoongi came over, placing two tall glasses filled with pink drinks topped with whipped cream, Taehyung gulped. ‘Now this was more like my drink!’ Taehyung thought happily, fingers itching to pull the glass closer. “Don’t worry,” Yoongi said, pulling up a chair and sat across of Taehyung. “There’s no coffee, I promise.” “Thank you.” Taehyung sheepishly grinned, nearing the glass to him before taking a sip through the straw. Yoongi only watched in amusement, an elbow on the table and his head leaning against his palm. When Taehyung pulled away, with his eyes twinkling and mouth beaming, Yoongi could not help but to smile. “I swear, this is the best strawberry milkshake I’ve ever had!” “Glad you love it.” “God...” Taehyung mumbled, taking a huge sip like a starved man. The milkshake was sweet and the taste of the strawberry was strong, but surprisingly not as sour as Taehyung used to. Within minutes, his glass was nearly empty yet Yoongi’s barely lessen at all. Yoongi only watched as Taehyung contently drank his milkshake, his feet making small noises as they tap and at times, he would hum before swallowing. It was an endearing sight, how Taehyung seemed so elated and relaxed after consuming his strawberry milkshake. “I don’t think I’d be able to go back to any other milkshake,” Taehyung sighed, his lips quirking upwards. “I’d be happy to make you more.” Yoongi smiled, forcing himself to stare at Taehyung’s face despite his ears were burning hot. “Really?” “Really.” “Is that a promise?” Taehyung grinned, wiggling his eyebrows. Yoongi playfully rolled his eyes before letting out a sigh, wanting to pretend to be disinterested but it was hard to tamper the smile that was threatening to take over his face when Taehyung was looking at him so expectantly with such bright eyes. In the end, Yoongi only nodded, mirroring Taehyung’s huge grin. “Promise.” extra order After many milkshakes later, it dawned to Taehyung that he never got to pay for any of them. Sure, he did pay for the croissants and doughnuts, but Yoongi would always come up with new drinks as a surprise. He also had come to a realisation that Yoongi always took a break whenever he came by, often sitting with him and talk with him that it almost felt like a date. And if he were to be honest, he blushed just thinking about it. He knew they were not ‘just friends’. ‘Just friends’ do not turn red and pull their fingers away when their fingertips touched. And ‘just friends’ absolutely do not make heart eyes at each other. It did not help that Yoongi started to give him cute pet names (sweet darling boy, baby bear, sweet cheeks, little guy) and call him ‘Taehyung-ie’ and Taehyung’s favourite — sweet darling Taehyung-ie. How was Taehyung supposed to keep himself from combusting every time Yoongi call him those adorable names? It gave Taehyung a good, warm feeling, like he was being embraced. He loved what they were now, and he was aware how selfish it was of him to want more. At the same time, though, he did not think he could hold himself back any longer. One night, Taehyung decided to stay a little longer. Yoongi did not question him why, but instead, he kept on bringing milkshakes to Taehyung’s table as a compensation for not being able to stay and accompany him. Taehyung did not feel lonely though because few days ago Yoongi had given him the staff’s wifi password. And it was so much faster than the guests’ wifi. ‘If that’s not love, I don’t know what is,’ Taehyung chuckled to himself. It was only when the cafè was empty that Yoongi finally pulled the chair in front of Taehyung, making Taehyung lock his phone to focus all his attention to Yoongi. He looked a bit tired, his eyes were drooping and his pouty lips were slightly parted. “You okay, hyung?” Taehyung asked, concerned. “I’m okay, little guy. Do you need anything else? I think we still have some chocolate milk in the fridge—” “Hyung, no, no. Just stay, please,” Taehyung murmured, quick to reach his hand out to touch Yoongi’s before Yoongi could leave. “Oh,” Yoongi muttered, gaze shifting to their hands. Taehyung pulled his hand back, giving Yoongi a sheepish grin. “Hyung, if you think I’m here just for the milkshakes...” Taehyung begun, his eyebrows furrowing as he folded his arms, “then you are only partly correct. Though I love your milkshakes, I lov— like!” Taehyung’s voice went three octaves higher, a bit glad that he managed to catch himself before saying something else. He cleared his throat to continue, voice much deeper this time to indicate that he was being serious, “I like your presence even more.” There were pink hues on Yoongi’s cheeks, and it seemed as if Taehyung had driven all the exhaustion away from him as he straightened in his seat. “I... I was wondering...” Taehyung gulped, suddenly feeling antsy as he grabbed the empty glass to twirl the straw around. “What are we, hyung?” “What do you mean, little guy?” “I know we’re not just friends. If we are, then... then I wanna let you know that I want us to be more than that.” Yoongi blinked repeatedly, which somehow made him a thousand times more cuter than he already was. It made Taehyung wonder if that was a mistake, and he was already regretting it. He was ready to fake a laughter and yelling out “SIKE!” before running away to hide the tears that are going to stream down his face. He was probably giving Yoongi his awkward, boxy smile, but Yoongi was not even responding except for the blinks. He could feel his palms sweating, his head was spinning and— “Taehyung-ah, you know hyung hates milkshakes right? And yet, hyung promised to always make you milkshakes, right?” It was Taehyung’s turn to blink now. “Uhuh...” “I thought... I thought you’d get the hint that I would do anything for you,” Yoongi murmured, his voice was getting smaller at the end of his sentence as he looked away. Taehyung blinked again. “Hyung, what do you...” “Kim Taehyung...” Yoongi sighed, closing his eyelids for a few moment. When he opened his eyes, he was staring straight into Taehyung’s eyes, and Taehyung saw determination in them that it made Taehyung swallow. “Will you let me make you milkshakes for as long as you want me to?” Taehyung wanted to combust right at the spot. How was it possible for Yoongi to make something like that so romantic? Taehyung understood then, that it was Yoongi’s way of proposing to become boyfriends and god, the thought of becoming Yoongi’s boyfriend was enough for him to orbit around the moon. His heart was soaring and his head felt somehow lighter. He let out a giggle before answering, “Yoongi hyung, I am happy to let you make me as many milkshakes as you want. I’d even be the taster for your new recipe even though they contain coffee.” Yoongi broke out into a grin before chuckling. The both of them burst out into a laughter, laughing at nothing in particular. When the laughter died down, Taehyung noticed how Yoongi kept on biting his lower lip, and there was an unfamiliar glint in his eyes. “Taehyung-ah, is it okay if hyung kiss you?” God, Taehyung wanted to run out of the cafè and scream. He could not contain his grin, and he was scared that he might have sounded too excited that he ended up just nodding. If Taehyung were to be honest, they were in quite an awkward position — being across each other and all that, with a small table in between — but Yoongi leaned in, one hand on the table for support and when their lips met, there were fireworks in Taehyung’s chest. It was... not really sweet. “Blegh.” Taehyung nearly gagged when he pulled away. “Really, hyung? How many coffee have you consumed?” “Ah, sorry, love,” Yoongi chuckled, not looking as if he was sorry at all. Taehyung, on the other hand, was beaming at the new pet name he was called. “C’mere hyung, give me a kiss and I’ll forgive you.” Translation: I would do anything for you, and I would still love you, even when you have coffee breath.

#kfk:oneshot #taegi #taegi fanfic #supv #supv fanfic #bts #kim taehyung #min yoongi

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admittedlynotspartacus · 7 years ago

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“Game of Thrones” Season VII: Episode 2 - A Foreign Invasion is Underway

Guys. Sam's acne treatment. The fury of Freddie Mercury. BARACK. AND MICHELLE. Y'all stepped it up. Let's talk about it.

DRAGONSTONE

Lightning. Thunder. And then, in the uppermost window of Dragonstone - THERE’S A LIGHT.

It’s D-Baby. She’s doing her usual thing of staring moodily out of windows of castles which she’s decided to post up in instead of, you know, TAKING THE THRONE. But then P-Dinky is like, “We’re not gonna stay here long.” And we’re all like -

But before she ducks outta here, she turns to Varys and does a dramatic recitation of his Wikipedia page and opens up the library on him without mercy.

Luckily, he passes the test with flying colors and receives a full fucking pardon when he’s like, “I listened to Robert. I listened to your daddy. But you’re the voice of the people, so ya know what -?”

There is no time for revels though, because Melisandre has warped back here and is notable for being the only lady who didn’t get the memo about wearing black this season.

Anyway, she starts spewing her usual “Prince That Was Promised” shit. And D-Baby’s like, “But I’m not a prince!” And Michelle is all, “WELL TECHNICALLY, IT’S A BAD TRANSLATION THAT ACTUALLY MEANS ‘PRINCE’ OR ‘PRINCESS...’”

And we’re all like...

While at the same time being like, “Like, what is gender, amiright?”

#TheRealPrinceThatWasPromised

WINTERFELL

So Melisandre’s told D-Baby and co. about J-Snow, and they’ve dispatched a raven summoning him. But Sansa smells fish and is like -

But we’re all at home like -

And meanwhile Davos is still like -

KING’S LANDING

Cersei’s with a bunch of Tyrell bannermen giving a really inspirational speech about how they shouldn’t back D-Baby that basically boils down to -

And they’re all like, “Yeah but dragons.” And Maester Frankenstein is just like, “Don’t worry guys...

And we’re all like, “Ohmigod I wonder what it is!!!!” And he takes Cersei down to the dragon lair to show her and we’re like, “Ohmigod we’re gonna find out this episode!” and then he whips the cloth off it and it’s A... giant... crossbow...

And at first I’m like, “Well, now wait a second. Maybe crossbows don’t exist yet in this world.”

Aight, N.V.M.

OLDTOWN

One time I went on a 7 hour kayaking trip and didn’t bring sunscreen to reapply. There were blisters. There was pus. And yet it was not one percent as bad as what has happened to poor Daddy Mormont, who basically looks like this -

Sam thinks he can cure him, but National Treasure Jim Motherfucking Broadbent is like, “You know not the ways.” Even though Sam has clearly risen up the ranks so much that NTJMB and he are already like -

NTJMB is even asking Sam for thoughts on his new book about the last six seasons of the TV show we’ve been watching. And Sam’s like, “I don’t like the title.” And NTJMB is like, “What would you rather call it?” And we’re all thinking -

And he doesn’t. Yet. Instead he goes to Daddy Mormont and he’s like -

Except less chill because he’s got a paint chipper, some rum, a hope and a prayer.

What follows is the grossest Thrones scene since Grand Maester Pycelle farted last year. Because Sam’s gotta get all this shit off Daddy Mormont by morning, but Daddy Mormont can’t scream. And there’s A LOT OF THIS SHIT ON HIM. So it basically is a combination of -

and -

DRAGONSTONE

The gang’s all here and they’re all pissed at D-Baby. Yara’s like, “We gotta attack NOW!” Mama Sand is starting a #NeverLannister movement, and D-Rigg is just like, “Hey, member Margaery?”

And then P-Dinky - remember him? He used to be the best character? - actually gets to talk and he’s like, going on about how Cersei is going to win banner-men over by appealing to their nationalism.

So in honor of Made in America week, he’s not outsourcing their plan to attack the cities around King’s Landing. Until he gets to his own home city and he’s like, “Dothraki and Unsullied, you dudes are taking Casterly Rock.”

Everybody’s V impressed at his sacrifice but also that D&D actually fucking let him drive a scene, so they’re all like -

Except D-Rigg still seems a little huffy, so she and D-Baby have a private conversation where D-Rigg is basically like, “You’re standing strong and tall. You’re the bravest of them all. If on courage you must call, then just keep on tryin’ and tryin’ and TRYIN’. Be a lion.”

And D-Baby’s just like -

And then. My dear dear friends. It’s just Barack. And Michelle. Alone. Barack’s headed out, Michelle is staying behind. It’s now or never.

And Barack just starts on his usual -

But Michelle is not having it. She’s like, “THIS is the moment.”

And then she’s like -

And then she fucking just goes for his pants but he’s like, “Stop.”

And she’s like, “Yo, lemme at that D.” But he’s all, “You don’t understand. Six inches forward and five inches back, I got a - I got an angry inch.” And she’s just like -

And suddenly, it’s just like ASS! BOOBS! ARE WE GONNA SEE HIS STUMPY-STUMP OHMIGOD I HOPE NOT!

And then she lays back like -

But instead he’s just like -

And we’re all just like -

WHEREVER ARYA IS

Arya is full of reunions this week, because at first she’s eating at this inn when who should pop up but fucking HOT PIE! Also revelation that Hot Pie totally looks like Dustin from Stranger Things.

Oh, he FOUND the chocolate pudding. He found it so hard. So they’re like chilling and she’s like -

When Hot Pie acts like the greatest GPS ever known to man and reroutes her to Winterfell by telling her the Boltons are dead. And just like that -

But first reunion #2. Because we get some creepy POV shots on Arya camping in the woods, plus some growling and snarling. And her horse is acting CRAY. And I’m thinking, “Oh fuck. Ed Sheeran and his bros are back to fucking rape her, QUICK TURN IT OFF!” But lo and behold - it’s a bunch of wolves! Which is still bad until one is like -

But it’s not gonna eat her or catcall at her, because it’s her old wolf, people! So Arya is like, “Come with me, Nymeria.” But Nymeria is like -

and she peaces out. Leaving Arya alone to be like, “I see the same sky through my eyes as you see through yours, but we’re worlds apart. Worlds apart.”

WINTERFELL

More RuPaul - Michelle Visage shenanigans as J-Snow finds out about the dragonglass on Dragonstone and is like, “I’m going.”

But Sansa still smells fish and is like -

Which then gets everyone to turn on J-Snow, so he’s just like, “You know what? Fuck this. You be queen.”

But of course Sansa’s just like -

Meanwhile, Littlefinger is still being a creep.

THE SEVEN FUCKING SEAS

All right, so here we are with the fucking Sand Snakes.

Yo I know, I know, but spoiler alert they’re gonna die soon, so it’s all okay. Just first, we have to listen to them have one more dumbass scene where the One Who Showed Her Boobs is like -

And Whale Rider and The Other One are like, “Mama! Mama! Mama!” And I’m just like -

But then we go to Yara and Mama flirting while Mama like Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf’s Theon into getting them drinks. And then she’s like, “Aren’t you gonna protect your sister?” And she starts like getting close to her and touching her legs. And then she literally says, “A foreign invasion is underway.”

But alas, the invasion is cut short, because the ships are being attacked! And it’s like fire! Storming! UNCLE FREDDIE MERCURY!

And lemme tell ya, he is READY TO GO. It’s just like axes and blood and stabbing. And we’re all like -

And I’m especially like, “Uncle Freddie Mercury, find the Sand Snakes. Kill them.”

But Yara finds The One Who Showed Her Boobs first and is like, “Yo, I’m still trying to fuck your mom. Go protect her.” And The One Who Showed Her Boobs is just like, “Got it.” But the other ones aren’t so lucky. Because first he comes for Whale Rider.

And then without missing a beat he goes for The Other One!

And then Freddie’s backup boys find Mama and The One Who Showed Her Boobs and Mama’s just like, “Kill us. Get it over with.” And again, I’m just like -

But of course, it’s Game of Thrones and we can’t have too much of a good thing.

Anyway, it’s full-on Yara vs. Uncle Freddie Mercury time, and meanwhile there’s still these like mystery fire cannons shooting off.

But THERE’S NO TIME FOR LOGIC! Yara’s about to get her throat slit when Freddie’s just like - “LITTLE THEON!!!”

And Freddie’s like got an axe to her throat, and Theon could just like... run at her? I guess? And do something? And then Freddie LEGIT Virginia Woolf’s him. Like -

And Theon’s just like -

BOOB COUNT: 1 BODY COUNT: 2, plus a lotta extras in that last scene (Rest in Eternal Misery Whale Rider & The Other One) EPISODE GRADE: A-

SER POUNCE’S STRAY THOUGHTS

I just don’t believe for a second Varys is going to stop conspiring behind people’s backs just because Daenerys made him swear an oath.

After so much hype about this Prince that Was Promised prophecy, it was just a BAD TRANSLATION? I dunno, guys.

I gotta say it, I was Team Sansa for such a long time, but she’s being quite the killjoy this season. And there’s nothing I hate more than being on Team Jon. That said, nothing she’s doing is really stupid. She’s being rightly cautious, but because we know Tyrion and D-Baby aren’t trapping them, it’s creating an interesting conflict for us.

Dickon joins the latest Thrones characters recast over the season break. No more Cormac from Half-Blood Prince.

They love saying “the wars to come.”

I’m so not about Diana Rigg dying, but I fear it is coming.

So just to be clear, the plan was to use Yara’s fleet to transport Ellaria back to Sunspear and get the Dornish army. But now, the fleet has been taken (right?) and Ellaria has been abducted. So none of these armies are technically in the control of Daenerys anymore.

Emmy campaign for Barack please.

So I think it’s safe to say that we can add another Samwise-Samwell parallel in that at the end of all this, Sam will document all these events into an essentially in-world Song of Ice and Fire book.

I’ve loved this Arya plot this season. I thought for sure she was headed down a path into ice-cold vengeance biddy, but this rediscovery of her early days is really lovely and unexpected.

Maisie Williams is so good.

Do we think Littlefinger knows about Jon’s parentage?

It seems as though Yara is still alive.

Two Sand Snakes down. One (and Mama) to go. But you gotta figure Cersei’s gonna take care of them next week. Dreams really do come true.

NEXT WEEK: Freddie Mercury is the champion, Casterly Rock invasion, and J-Snow and D-Baby together at last. Will they fuck?

#game of thrones #stormborn #daenerys #jonsnow #hbo #songoficeandfire #georgerrmartin #tyrion #sansa #stark #lannister #cersei #theon #euron #greyjoy #episode2 #season7

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batwynn · 8 years ago

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Invitation For Two

#Sterek #Drabble #unfinished #fanfic #Vampire!Stiles #college AU

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lalka-laski · 5 years ago

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Another Day, Another Dollar (and a survey to pass the time)

Coffee mugs, teacups, or water bottles? I collect kitschy mugs, most of which were souvenirs or gifts (for example, my sister’s boyfriend got me a mug with the ENTIRE script of Shrek printed on it. Amazing lol!). But I also love pretty teacups and I have several scattered around my apartment as decor. I even have this BEAUTIFUL tea set, hand-made and painted in Poland, that I’ve been meaning to display. Bubblegum or cotton candy? If we’re talking flavoring, then NEITHER! The idea alone of bubblegum or cotton-candy flavored shit makes me gag. How did your elementary school teachers describe you? I was quiet and not very social, but an exceptional student. I spent most of my free time reading books or writing my own stories. Pretty much an elementary teacher’s dream student!

Do you prefer to drink soda from cans, bottles or cups? My top choice across the board would be a cup with a straw. But I LOVE regular Coca-Cola from a can. It tastes so much better than Coke from a bottle or fountain machine for some reason. It’s sweeter and smoother with less of that painful carbonated burn. Earbuds or headphones? Earbuds, just because headphones make me look like a dork.

Movies or TV? TV shows are easier to fade in and out of, which is my preferred means of watching something. Favorite smell in the summer? SUNSCREEN! It’s such a distinct and familiar smell that’s contained to only a teeny sliver of the year. I love smells like that. Game you were best at in P.E./gym? It’s not a game but I was weirdly good at rock-climbing when we did that unit in high school? What do you have for breakfast on an average day? Nothing. I love breakfast food, just not at breakfast time. Name of your favorite playlist? I have this one playlist whose title is simply the sparkle/star emoji (creative, I know). It’s a lot of vibey, atmospheric jams that are the perfect soundtrack when I have people over just chilling and drinking. Lanyard or key ring? Keyring, but a lanyard might make my life easier. Favorite non-chocolate candy? Sourpatch Kids or any other type of sour gummy. Favorite book you had to read for school? Dude. I was an English nerd who later became an English major and at one point in the semester was averaging 2 novels a week. I could never pick a sole favorite from all my years in school and I’d struggle to even pick a favorite from each class. But for the sake of this question I’m gonna rattle off a few that come to mind. From middle school through high school I loved The Outsiders, The Westing Game, TKAM, anything by Steinbeck, Jane Eyre, The Poisonwood Bible, The Virgin Suicides.

AAAAAND I just started mentally listing my favorite books from college but got too overwhelmed. So I’m moving on to the next question now, thx!

Most comfortable position to sit in? Uh, I’ve never put much thought into that.

Most frequently worn pair of shoes? It depends on the season. And to be honest, I’d rather go barefoot whenever possible. Ideal weather? A little cool but sunny. I do love the rain but it hinders plans (and hair & makeup!) so I lean more towards sunny, dry days. Pencils or pens? PENS ONLY. Pencils gross me out. Obsession from childhood? Most of my childhood obsessions have carried over into adulthood: whimsical fairy tales and princesses (specifically Sleeping Beauty), the color pink, collecting diaries & journals... Favorite crystal? Rose quartz, if that counts? Favorite activity to do in warm weather? Swimming or laying by the pool/under a tree with a good book. And of course, I love me some day drinking on a summer day! Favorite activity to do in cold weather? Staying cozy inside, also with a good book and a good drink. See a theme here? Five songs to describe you? Thursday’s Child- David Bowie She Talks to Angels- The Black Crowes Paradise- Coldplay Never Get You Right- Brandon Flowers Silver Lining- David Gray

Best way for someone to bond with you? Music and literature are my favorite ways to connect with a person. There’s nothing more intimate (and I mean that both in a romantic and platonic sense) than listening to a song or reading a poem/passage with someone and then discussing what it means to you. Top 5 favorite Vines? I have many! “Road work ahead” is of course a fave. And there are so many more that I can’t think of right now. Ads you have stuck in your head? None atm

Average time you fall asleep? Depends entirely on the night What is the first meme you remember seeing? Yikes, I can’t remember. I’m sure it involved a cat? Suitcase, duffel bag, or backpack? Suitcase with wheels Lemonade or tea? Lemonade is my favorite non-alcoholic drink ever. I even named my childhood teddy bear “Lemonade.” Last person you texted? Glenn Jacket pockets or pants pockets? Jacket pockets, I never carry things in pants pockets. Favorite type of jacket? Jackets are my favorite item of clothing, so I’m a hoarder of cute jackets, blazers & coats! Favorite scent for soap? Lavender & cedarwood from Bath & Body Works. Sci-fi, fantasy, or superheroes? I don’t care much for either. What clothes do you sleep in? Usually just a comfy tee shirt Favorite type of cheese? Extra extra sharp cheddar (preferably white). So sharp it makes your jaw tingle! What saying or quote do you live by? I’m trying to ask myself lately “What can I learn from this?” or “What can this offer me?” What are you currently stressed about? For the most part, I’m in a good place. I feel aligned and centered and a HELL of a lot better than I’ve ever felt. My biggest struggles currently are related to body image, envy & self-worth, which is a lifelong battle for most, no? Favorite font? Cabria or something like that? What did you learn from your first job? Speaking up for yourself is difficult but it’s one of life’s necessary evils Favorite fairy tale? Sleeping Beauty, of course! It’s an obsession. Favorite tradition? That’s a difficult question because I’m SUPER sentimental and I have tons of personal & family traditions. Talent you’re proud of having? Empathy

If you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be? "Stop it!” exclaimed in disbelief or surprise. If you were an anime character, what genre of anime would it be? I have no clue Character you relate to? Elle Woods (on my best days). Favorite website from your childhood? I loved gurl.com and Alloy. I just checked to see if either still exist.... gurl now links to Seventeen (another favorite in my teen years) and Alloy links to Youtube? Odd. Any scars? A very faint one. Actually it may not even be there anymore. Favorite flower? Chrysanthemum Any good luck charms? Like I said, I’m a very sentimental person. So I have several! Least favorite flavor of food or drink? Well a question from earlier in the survey reminded me how much I ABHOR bubblegum or cotton candy flavored things. I’m also very picky about lemon. I love lemonade or lemon candies, but can’t stand the flavor in desserts or savory dishes. So maybe I just like artificial lemon flavor? Left or right handed? I’m right handed but always wished I was left-handed just because I thought it was cool. Least favorite pattern? None come to mind immediately Worst subject in school? Math of any sort. Chemistry was also wicked hard for me. Favorite weird flavor combo? I don’t think anything I eat is that weird or abnormal When did you lose your first tooth? No clue Favorite potato food? Hashbrown patties or curly fries. Not a huge fan of regular french fries, although that doesn’t stop me from eating them whenever the opportunity presents itself... Gas station coffee or grocery store sushi? Weird options. But I don’t eat sushi and I actually love gas station coffee so there’s a clear winner here.

Earth tones or jewel tones? Jewel tones Do you call them fireflies or lightning bugs? Fireflies

PC or console gaming? I don’t game

Writing or drawing? Writing Podcasts or talk radio? Podcast, I suppose. But I rarely find podcasts I enjoy. Most of the time it just seems like a person who likes the sound of their own voice rambling, or two or more people having a conversation that doesn’t need an audience. Barbie or Polly Pocket? Barbie but Polly Pocket was still that bitch

Fairy tales or mythology? I’m partial to fairy tales but that doesn’t mean I find mythology any less fascinating.

Cookies or cupcakes? Cookies all day Your greatest fear? Death or losing a loved one Your greatest wish? To find inner peace and happiness, to live a long life with my loved ones Who would you put before everyone else? My loved ones^ Wow I’ve used that phrases a lot in these past few questions. Lamps, overhead lights, fairy lights, or sunlight? Fairy lights!! Nicknames? Lil Bit/Libit, Lala, Enebis, Lala, Liz, Lizzie, Ela. The name “Elizabeth” lends itself to a hell of a lot of nicknames haha! Favorite season? Fall, probably. But I’ve grown to love Spring too as I’ve gotten older. Which is weird because it was always my least favorite growing up. I used to find it depressing but now I think it’s inspiring. Favorite app on your phone? Snapchat probably What is your desktop background? I’m on a work computer right now so it’s just our company logo How many phone numbers do you have memorized? Uhh.... very few.

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