#thinking about all the things i can't say or do and that i wish i could say or do grrrrrr

[licking-rocks]

Gonna answer these for fun because why not

Good with my mom; amicable but not close with my dad; not too close but alright with my step-dad

My cat lol. Aside from that - my mom, probably

Not off the top of my head, no

Not particularly. I used to be awfully insecure when I was about 17-18, but not anymore. It took a while to internalize the fact that no one else notices the things you're insecure about and if they do, they probably don't think of it as much as you do

Single and very aroace

Quick and painless. Not quick enough for me to not understand what's happening though - I want to know what dying feels like before I go

A bowl of cereal

Somehow this question made me realize that no, I've never played sports. Huh. I thought I used to do at least something when I was younger but nothing comes to mind.

I try not to, but yea. It's a bad habit I'm trying to get rid of. I even tried that nail polish that tastes nasty to make you stop, but still - I can't help it sometimes

When I was a little kid with my sister. I'm not the kind of person to get into fights

Nope :))!

Nope, I don't think I ever even got to 24h awake T~T

No, I don't think so. For some reason hating someone feels childish (the bad kind of childish. Generally I don't mind being childish, so long as it's not petty schoolyard fights)

All of my middle school friends. I didn't miss them as much as I do until I went out with two of them earlier in the year after seeing one on the bus. Now I've realized we've all changed so much we couldn't have the kind of friendships we did even if we really, really wanted to. Also my dad - haven't seen him face-to-face in a few years now. I wish I could give the man a hug

A cat named Spirga :))). Gonna reblog with an image for her when I get home :))

A little anxious - I have to present something in at most a few hours and even though it's only gonna take 5 min I'm nervous about it

I've never made out with anyone at all T~T Also in a bathroom? Seems like an odd spot for it

Only if they're close enough to climb on me. If that little guy is by the ceiling - they're chill and can hang out there all they want. If they're on my desk - please leave and don't hurt me :((

Yea, just to see if everything looked as colorful and nice as I remember it. I want to experience the summer of 2016 again

Ok I had to look up the meaning of "to snog", but nevertheless - primary school's yard, circa 2011

The local thrift chain is dropping their prices to 0.5 euro a piece on Saturday, so I'm going to every. single. one. in my city. And my niece's birthday is on Sunday, so I'm gonna do that too

Biologically - not a single one. Adopted - maybe 2-3, if I'm economically stable enough for it

Just the usual lobe piercings. I'd love at least a few more lobe piercings (I'm thinking 2 in one ear, 3 in the other) and perhaps an industrial or bridge? Idk, haven't thought about it much

In high school, my best was easily English (I don't live in an English-speaking country, so the class wasn't a literature analysis class, but just a regular language class). Currently (3rd semester of uni) it's, oddly enough, gender studies (one of the few free electives that has nothing to do with my actual field of study - geography)

See answer to question 14

So, Lidl has these crispy salted caramel chocolate and it's to die for, I love it

Not that I know of, no

Can't get cheated on if you never date ;)

Can't make a bf/gf cry if you never date ;)

Someone is loudly whispering across the classroom and I can't focus on what the professor is saying

My family and my friends :333

I have a very unhealthy obsession yellow

Quite the opposite - I trust very, very easily. If you aren't holding a knife at me, you could probably easily take me into the woods with you and I wouldn't realize "hey this ain't safe" until way too late

I dreamt I was walking into the woods near my house, got chased by a beaver, fell into the little stream running through the woods (which is, like, 20 cm deep) and somehow got carried right to the Arctic (the little stream does not go directly to the sea. It goes into another river, which I did not end up in. That river also goes into another river, which then goes into the Baltic sea - far from Arctic)

My mom when I decided to drop my driving lessons (I'm SORRY driving a manual is HARD and I'm STUPID and when she reassures me that it's fine I CRY)

I'll give 2565623th chances like it's nothing

Forgive, I think. To forget something truly, really hurtful would take much, much more effort, especially if you plan to keep the person in your life

So far - it's in the middle sorta. Had better, am planning better (first ever solo trip in January 2025 WOOOOO) but I also had a lot of fun this year and would love for every year to be something like this :))

Like 7? I think? I had my last one so far (excluding family members) not too long after lol

.... No?

Grilled cheese. Also your numbers are fuckde up D':

Nah, I think some stuff happens just because

Scrolled Twitter

NO

I try not to be. I hope I'm not

None

Yea :33

Sunny, a little warm (14-16­°C), no wind. I often see this type of weather in mid/late spring and ooooh I love it

Yea, it's fun!!

If it works out, sure. I don't feel romantic attraction, but if a friend asked me to marry them, I'd probably say yes

Depends on the circumstance, I guess. I gotta know them enough/like them enough. Also if they're over 5 years older than me it's not cute, it creeps me out

Dude so, so much - seeing a small animal, nice weather, a good walk, good music, good food, giving gifts or being given gifts, spending time with people I love, talking to new people, even if it's just a quick convo on the bus, making something I can be proud of, etc

Yea, I'd like to one day. I saw the last name "Šalna" ("Frost") in a book and got absolutely enamored with it. Not too sure about a first name though. I want something pretentious on purpose (like the name of a goddess or otherwise a long, uncommon name, like Severija or something (I hate the book I associate this name with, but I gotta say, really rolls off the tongue)

I haven't talked to him in, what, 10-11 years? Also he was kind of a prick, but, then again, he was a kid. Regardless, yea

Think stuff over in terms of compatibility - would we make good roommates? Financial partners? Potentially co-parents? You can't keep a relationship afloat on love and lust, you need to get along in many different spheres of life. Otherwise? I guess I'd go for it

I have like one friend of the opposite sex and we don't talk outside of class

My stepdad, probably

My little sister

Yea. There isn't a doubt in my mind that some people are just meant to be together. Not always romantically, but they're meant to have each other around

Anyone I care about. I'd like to think I'd also die for someone weaker than myself if push came to shove, but I probably wouldn't.

WOW that took longer than expected

70 horrible questions ... Fuck it

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents? 02: Who did you last say “I love you” to? 03: Do you regret anything? 04: Are you insecure? 05: What is your relationship status? 06: How do you want to die? 07: What did you last eat? 08: Played any sports? 09: Do you bite your nails? 10: When was your last physical fight? 11: Do you like someone? 12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours? 13: Do you hate anyone at the moment? 14: Do you miss someone? 15: Have any pets? 16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment? 17: Ever made out in the bathroom? 18: Are you scared of spiders? 19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? 20: Where was the last place you snogged someone? 21: What are your plans for this weekend? 22: Do you want to have kids? How many? 23: Do you have piercings? How many? 24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)? 25: Do you miss anyone from your past? 26: What are you craving right now? 27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? 28: Have you ever been cheated on? 29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? 30: What’s irritating you right now? 31: Does somebody love you? 32: What is your favourite color? 33: Do you have trust issues? 34: Who/what was your last dream about? 35: Who was the last person you cried in front of? 36: Do you give out second chances too easily? 37: Is it easier to forgive or forget? 38: Is this year the best year of your life? 39: How old were you when you had your first kiss? 40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked? 51: Favourite food? 52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason? 53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? 54: Is cheating ever okay? 55: Are you mean? 56: How many people have you fist fought? 57: Do you believe in true love? 58: Favourite weather? 59: Do you like the snow? 60: Do you wanna get married? 61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? 62: What makes you happy? 63: Would you change your name? 64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? 65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? 66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? 67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? 68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? 69: Do you believe in soulmates? 70: Is there anyone you would die for?

[hanniebaeee]

Crushed

Hyunjin x fem!reader

Warnings: sexting, SMUT MDNI

Genre: campus au! (college romance), collegemates to lovers, fluff, smut

Summary: Your best friend Jennie has the biggest crush on Changbin. Changbin likes her too, but they're way too shy to talk to each other. Then there's Hyunjin, Changbin's best friend. And it looks like you and Hyunjin will get together before they do.

a/n: I craved a nice flirty college romance - Hyunjin is 99% flirty menace and 1% human in his one 😋

You had only one person to blame for this situation you're in right now. Jennie Kim. Your best friend. Her and her stupid crush on her dream boy, Seo Changbin.

The library was quiet, as usual. You were casually scanning the titles of books, trying to find that one book you've been chasing for weeks. But suddenly you felt a presence behind you, a little too close for comfort.

Turning around, you found Hyunjin (Changbin’s best friend), leaning casually against the shelf, his eyes fixed on you. There was something about the way he was looking at you - like a predator sizing up his prey.

"Hey," he said, his voice smooth and low, as if he hadn’t just materialized out of nowhere and cornered you between two rows of books.

"Uh, hi?" you replied, more of a question than a greeting.

Hyunjin’s lips curled into a smile, and he stepped closer, just enough to make the space between you feel way too small.

"So, I was thinking," he started, his tone so casual it was almost suspicious, "you've been acting kind of mysterious lately. Like, there's something you're hiding."

Your brain went into overdrive. Oh. So this was about Jennie’s crush. You knew this was an interrogation, disguised as flirting. And damn, Hyunjin was good.

"Mysterious? Me?" you laughed, trying to sound nonchalant. "You’re imagining things, Hyunjin."

"Am I?" he teased, leaning in just a little more. "Because I can’t help but notice you always seem to look my way. It’s flattering, really."

You had half a mind to just tell him it had nothing to do with him. Just so see that damn smug look fall off his ridiculously gorgeous face. But you can't do that to Jennie. So you resisted.

I think you’ve got the wrong idea," you said, taking a small step back, only to bump into the bookshelf behind you.

Hyunjin didn’t back off, though. In fact, he seemed to take your retreat as a challenge.

"Oh? So you’re saying you’re not interested in me at all?" He tilted his head slightly, his eyes narrowing playfully.

Your mind scrambled for a response, desperate to get out of this increasingly flustering situation.

"Well, you are kind of nice to look at," you said with a little laugh, hoping to throw him off his path. "But definitely delusional."

"Smooth," He said, chuckling softly.

"Oh please," you shot back, quickly slipping past him and you ran for your life, mentally cursing Jennie.

The cafeteria was buzzing with the usual lunchtime chatter, but at your table, the conversation was anything but calm.

“Jennie, I swear your stupid crush is going to get me killed, like real soon,” You said, trying to catch your breath from all the running. “He was just so close…and he looked so good, oh my God!”

You felt your cheeks heating up just talking about it, and you quickly covered your face with your hands.

“And you still didn’t crack? I’m proud of you!" Jisoo cackled.

"Me too," you said, smiling sheepishly. "But honestly, if he had pushed a little harder, I don’t think I could’ve held it together."

Jennie on the other hand was still pouting over the fact that Changbin wasn't making a move on her.

You sighed, reaching over to give her a comforting pat on the back.

“It's gonna be ok, Binnie’s shy, and it's so obvious he likes you!” you said with a smile.

“I just wish he would do it sooner! Because my fantasies are running wild now!” Jennie sighed and you and Jisoo burst out laughing.

Just then you see the boys come into the cafeteria, engaged in some animated conversation.

"Well, I know that if Hyunjin asked me out, I’d just say yes. I mean, he’s way too yummy to let go." You say with a shrug.

Heeseung leaned casually against the wall, chatting with you. You both were laughing at something he said, totally unaware of the storm brewing in the distance.

Hyunjin and Changbin were strolling into the building, when Hyunjin stopped mid-step, his eyes narrowing as his eyes fell on you and the handsome guy near you.

“WHO. IS. THAT.”

Changbin sighed and took in deep breath like he’s asking the universe for strength.

“Bro, keep it together. You’re acting like she’s already your girlfriend.” He bit out.

“She IS my girlfriend. She just doesn’t know it yet.” Hyunjin fumed. “IS SHE LAUGHING AT HIS JOKE?!”

Changbin groaned as he said, “Don’t do this here. Please.”

“No. Absolutely not. Look at him. He’s too... smiley. Too close. He looks ALIVE.” Hyunjin said, his fists clenched.

“He’s literally just talking to her. Calm down.”

“That’s how it starts. Next thing you know, he’ll be proposing marriage.”

“Oh my God.”

And you were getting really good at this. Were you a psychic? Because you sensed the heat of Hyunjin’s glare before you even saw him.

When you turned around, he was standing there like a statue, looking like he was about to do something dramatic. You cleared your throat awkwardly, giving Heeseung a polite smile and saying a quick bye before walking towards Hyunjin.

And Hyunjin didn't even bother hiding his jealousy. His eyes were glowing with possessiveness as you pretended not to notice Hyunjin’s feral energy.

“Hey, Changbin,” You said, giving him a sweet smile.

Changbin chuckled and gave you a friendly salute.

Hyunjin just stood there, jaw clenched, eyes still locked on you. You finally turned your attention to him, raising an eyebrow.

“Hi, baby,” You purred, and that was that.

Hyunjin completely glitched - his eyes widened, and for a moment, he looked like he'd forgotten how to breathe.

Baby?! BABY?! Did she just call me BABY?! Oh my god. Oh my GOD. Is this real? Is this heaven? Is she teasing me? No, she’s not teasing me. SHE MEANS IT. She knows I’m hers. She knows I’d DIE for her. Oh god, she’s smiling. WAIT - DON’T GLITCH, HYUNJIN. SAY SOMETHING BACK. BE COOL.

Oh yeah, the internal monologue Hyunjin experienced was hilarious.

Changbin burst out laughing, slapping Hyunjin on the back as he watched him short-circuit in real-time.

“You okay there, Hyunjin? You’re looking a little... red.” Changbin teased, and Hyunjin snapped out of it trying and failing miserably to look in control.

“Fine. Totally fine.” He said, his eyes narrowing at you.

“You sure? You look a little…flustered?” You asked, knowing exactly what's in his mind.

“I’m not flustered. You’re flustered.” Hyunjin shot back, and Changbin laughed harder.

“Aha, sure,”

Jennie didn’t even want to be in the gym, but Jisoo had convinced her that working out might help her stop obsessing over Changbin. Ironically, that plan flew out the window when she turned a corner and there he was, in all his sweat-soaked glory, lifting weights.

She froze, holding her water bottle so tightly against her chest.

Changbin didn’t notice her at first, and Jennie was trying to quietly flee the scene, when she tripped over her own bag. Right into his chest.

In true K-drama style, Changbin’s reflexes kicked in, and he caught her around the waist before she could hit the ground.

“Are you okay?” Changbin asked, his eyes wide as he glanced down at her.

But Jennie? She's dead. D-E-A-D. With his hand still on her waist. What a beautiful way to go.

“Uh..yes..fine..totally fine..thank you…OH GOD.” Jennie rambled, trying to move, but her limbs are jelly.

Changbin, who had no clue what to do with his life now that the world’s most beautiful girl is in his arms, just stared at her.

“Um...be careful?” He managed to mumble.

“YES. BEING CAREFUL. DEFINITELY. BYE.”

She bolted out of the gym before he could say another word, leaving Changbin standing there, still replaying the moment in his head.

----

Jennie was still shaking as she walked with you and Jisoo towards your dorm, past the football field later that day. You snuck at glance at the field because you knew Hyunjin would be there, for his daily practice sessions.

And as suspected, Changbin and Hyunjin were there, their team jerseys clinging to their sweat-slick bodies.

Hyunjin spotted you instantly, and his eyes locked with yours from across the field. With a grin, he puckered his perfectly plush lips and threw you the sexiest kiss. It was so dramatic and slow, and so… Hyunjin.

You felt your face go crimson as Jisoo and Jennie lost it next to you, clutching their stomachs in laughter.

“Oh my God, STOP!” You hissed at your friends, walking faster.

Hyunjin, now thoroughly pleased with himself, smirked and added insult to injury by winking at you like the cockiest man on Earth. He jogs back to his position satisfied, knowing he’d just melted your brain.

Changbin: You're so extra.

Hyunjin: Unapologetically so. And? It worked. Did you see her blush?

Changbin: You live in your own little fantasy world, don’t you?

Hyunjin: Call it what you want. It’s only a matter of time.

Changbin: Bro, you’re something else🙄

Hyunjin: Thank you. I try😎

You were sitting at your usual table in the library, nose buried in your notes. The atmosphere is quiet, serene - until you smell a certain spicy cologne.

You didn’t even have to look up to know who it was. You signed as he slid into the seat across from you with all the stealth of a tiger.

“Fancy seeing you here, baby girl.” You cringed so hard at that nickname, and glanced up, raising an unimpressed eyebrow.

“Do you even know where the books are in this place?” You asked flatly, because you honestly didn't believe that he did.

He chuckled, leaning back in his chair and said, “Don’t need books when the prettiest thing in here is sitting right in front of me.”

You rolled your eyes so hard you might have sprained something. But he leaned forward, resting his chin on his hand as he watched you with that infuriatingly smug expression.

“I missed you. You know I can’t go a day without saying something completely inappropriate to you.” He said, his tone so unfairly sexy.

You pointedly ignored him, and he just tilted his head with a teasing glint in his eyes. You snapped your notebook shut, glaring at him, though your heart was racing.

“Fine. Hand it over.

“What?”

You held out your hand and said, “Your phone.”

He looked completely surprised for a moment - genuinely thrown off - before his smirk returned. And he dug his phone out of his pocket, unlocked it and placed it in your palm.

You quickly typed your number in and slid the phone back across the table. Leaning in slightly, your lips curved into a sly smile.

“There. Now you can text me whatever you want without ambushing me in public.” You whispered, and Hyunjin stared at the phone in his hand, then at you. His cocky demeanor was replaced by something softer - almost boyish, for a moment.

“You just give me your number?” He said, like he really couldn't believe that just happened.

“Don’t make it a big deal now. Just use it wisely.” You said with a smirk, and grabbed your things.

Throwing him a cheeky wink, you walked away, leaving him completely smitten.

“Oh, trust me, baby girl. You’re going to regret this.” He called after you, earning a sharp glare from some of the other students.

----

You were curled up in bed, cozy under your blankets, scrolling mindlessly through your phone. Just as your eyelids started getting heavy, your phone buzzed.

Hyunjin: You awake, baby girl?

You sighed, already knowing this isn’t going to end peacefully.

You: Barely. What do you want and can you please stop calling me that?

Hyunjin: To ruin your night. Obvious, isn’t it?

You rolled your eyes but found yourself smiling. Of course.

You: Hyunjin, it’s midnight. Go to sleep.

Hyunjin: Can’t stop thinking about you.

You: What about me?

And that was all the invitation he needed to go full throttle.

Hyunjin: About how you looked at me in the library today. About how you bit your lip when you handed me my phone, like you knew I won't be able to get that off my mind.

Your eyes widened, the air suddenly feeling too warm.

You: What are you even talking about?

Hyunjin: Don’t play coy, baby girl. I’m imagining you right now. Your hair messy on your pillow, wearing some cute pyjamas. Or maybe nothing at all. Which is it?

You groaned, dropping your phone and covering your face with your hands. This man. This man. You shouldn’t engage - you knew you shouldn’t - but your hands betrayed you as they picked up the phone and typed.

You: Hyunjin. It’s. Midnight.

Hyunjin: And yet, you’re still texting me back. You could’ve ignored me, but here you are. Why is that, hmm?

You bit your lip, glaring at the screen, but before you can respond, another message comes through.

Hyunjin: Bet you’re blushing right now. Maybe squeezing your thighs together too. Tell me I’m wrong.

Your jaw dropped.

You: You’re delusional.

Hyunjin: Am I? Or do you secretly enjoy how much I want you? Because I do. Every damn second. I’m losing my mind thinking about you under me, moaning my name, pulling my hair. And you know what’s worse? I know you’ve thought about it too.

You pressed a hand to your face, your heart pounding as your body reacted to everything he was saying. Damn him.

You: Hyunjin, I swear to god.

Hyunjin: Swear to me later. Right now, just admit it.

You exhaled sharply, fingers hovering over the keyboard, debating whether to shut this down or let him win. But the next message sealed your fate.

Hyunjin: Baby girl, I’m so hard right now. And it’s all your fault.

You tossed your phone onto the bed and pressed your face into the pillow, muttering curses under your breath. You and your brain debated if this was a good idea one last time. Because you could barely resist this man.

Finally, you grabbed your phone and typed back, your pulse racing.

You: You’re impossible. You know that, right?

Hyunjin: Am I?

You: Goodnight, Hyunjin.

Hyunjin: Sweet dreams, baby girl. Hope I’m in them.

You tossed your phone aside again, sinking back into your pillows, exasperated. You hated how much he affected you. Like how you were actually squeezing your thighs together. You were in so much trouble.

You tossed and turned for around fifteen minutes, Hyunjin’s words replaying in your mind like a broken record. He was hard? Well, it felt cruel to leave someone as hot and devoted as Hyunjin to suffer didn't it? You're so kind hearted. You're doing this because you're kind. Ok.

With a frustrated groan, you grabbed your phone. Your heart raced as you opened your conversation with him. This was a terrible idea. But the temptation was too strong to ignore.

Your fingers trembled as you typed a message.

You: Have you… solved your problem yet?

You hit send before you could chicken out, putting your phone down on the bed and burying your face in your hands. What are you doing?

The response came almost immediately, making your stomach flip.

Hyunjin: Oh? Couldn’t sleep without knowing, huh?

You bit your lip, already regretting this.

Hyunjin: And just so you know, I haven't solved it yet. Wanna help me?

You choked on your own breath. Against your better judgment, you typed back.

You: How exactly am I supposed to do that?

The pause before his next message felt like an eternity. When it finally arrived, you almost dropped your phone.

Hyunjin: Start by telling me what you’re wearing right now.

You stared at the screen, heat rushing to your face. This was ridiculous. You were wearing an oversized t-shirt and shorts, but somehow, telling him that felt scandalous.

You: An old t-shirt and shorts. Nothing special.

Hyunjin: Bet you look so damn cute. But you know what would look even better? You without it.

You: Hyunjin.

Hyunjin: What? I’m just being honest. Now tell me something else. Are you touching yourself while you think about me?

Your jaw dropped for the hundredth time that night. This man.

You: Excuse me?! No, I am not!

But you pressed your thigh together, your arousal burning through you.

Hyunjin: Why not? You should.

Hyunjin: Close your eyes, baby girl. Imagine me there with you. My hands on your thighs, sliding up under that shirt, my lips tracing your neck…

You gripped your phone tightly, your heart pounding out of control.

You: Hyunjin, stop.

Hyunjin: Shh. Just listen. You’d be so perfect beneath me, squirming, begging me for more. I wouldn’t stop until you were screaming my name, completely undone.

You let out a shaky breath, your entire body on fire. You’d never done this before - sexting someone, that is. And never let someone get under your skin like this, either. But Hyunjin? He was intoxicating.

You: I hate you for this.

Hyunjin: Liar. You love it. You love how much I want you, how I can’t stop thinking about you. Tell me I’m wrong.

And you couldn’t. You couldn't tell him he was wrong because he was absolutely right.

You: You’re infuriating.

Hyunjin: And you’re incredible. Now, do us both a favor and get some rest, baby girl. I’ll be dreaming about you.

You sighed, staring at the screen, unsure whether you wanted to scream, laugh, or throw your phone across the room.

You: Goodnight, Hyunjin.

Hyunjin: Goodnight baby (And I did solve the problem, thanks to you.)

You: omg, go away🙈

You groaned, putting your phone away for good and burying yourself under your blankets. Hyunjin has officially invaded your night and you knew he’ll be all you could think about until you saw him again.

The next morning, you found Hyunjin leaning casually against a wall in your department building, with his hands shoved in his pockets, his signature smirk plastered across his face.

It’s the intensity in his gaze that hit you first. The way his eyes trace over you with a slow, deliberate sweep, like he’s seeing you for the first time.

“Slept well?” He asked, his voice so smooth, you could've slipped on it.

You froze, feeling the heat rush to your face and down your neck. He knew what he did to you - he’s savoring it. The way your body reacted to his presence, the way your heart raced in his vicinity.

“Don’t you have somewhere to be?” you asked, trying to sound casual.

Hyunjin took a step towards you, his eyes darkening further. You felt your breath hitch, the space between you crackling with tension. His gaze dropped to your lips, then back to your eyes.

“I'm exactly where I need to be.” He whispered.

His voice was so low, so commanding, you almost forgot how to breathe. Every inch of you was on fire from the way he was looking at you.

“What do you want, Hyunjin?”

“You. I want you.”

He took another step closer, his body touching yours, and you could feel the raw energy pouring off of him.

You couldn't move - the heat in your body was suffocating, and every inch of you was trembling. You weren't sure whether you wanted to run or pull him closer.

“I hate you.” You whispered.

“You can hate me all you want, baby. But you’ll still be thinking about me tonight. You’ll still be wanting me.” Hyunjin said, and he takes a step back, flashing you a smile.

Not a grin or a smirk. A beautiful, genuine smile.

You tried to swallow your desire, but it was impossible. With a final look that sent a shiver down your spine, he turns and walks away.

----

You lay on your bed that night, the silence suffocating, the thoughts of him flooding your mind. You were tempted to grab your phone, but you hesitate.

No, you told yourself. You’re not doing this again.

But then, almost as if on cue, your phone buzzed, sending a shock straight through your body.

Hyunjin: Thinking about me?

Hyunjin: I know you want this. I can see it in your eyes. You can’t deny it anymore.

You: What do you want, Hyunjin?

A moment passed.

Hyunjin: I want you, baby. I want to hear you say it. That you want me too.

You did want him. You’ve wanted him from the moment you met him, even though you were terrified of where this was headed.

You: I want you, Hyunjin.

Hyunjin: Good girl.

You: What now?

Hyunjin: Now, you let go. Trust me. I’ll be with you the entire way.

You felt the heat between your legs, the aching need that’s been growing ever since you saw him earlier. You slide your hand beneath your shirt, letting your fingers trace down your body. You gasped, not expecting it to feel this good.

Hyunjin: Touch yourself for me. Slowly.

You followed his command without thinking, your fingers ghosting over your skin, moving slowly in sync with his words.

Hyunjin: That’s it. Keep going. I want to hear you. I want to know exactly how you’re touching yourself. Can I call you?

You almost drop your phone. But you're so gone, you text a quick yes.

And he called.

“Baby? Go on now, don't stop.”

There was silence as your fingers slid through your warm wet folds. It has never felt this good before. You could heart Hyunjin’s soft gasps and grosns too. And everytime you made a sound, you could hear Hyunjin's breath shake or he'd exhale loudly.

“I’m close, Hyunjin. So close.” You moan softly, breathlessly.

“Let go for me, baby… let go,”

And you did. You let go. Every muscle in your body tightened, and you couldn't help the moan that escapes your lips as you come undone, your body trembling from the force of it. You whispered his name softly.

And almost immediately you heard him curse under his breath, a breathy moan leaving his lips. You were both gasping for breath, and that's all you could hear just then.

You smiled to yourself, knowing full well that this was only the beginning.

----

The sun was barely up, casting a soft golden glow over the field. You made your way toward the football field, your mind buzzing with anticipation. Last night was still fresh in your mind, and you couldn't wait anymore.

As you approached the field, you spotted him. Hyunjin was in the middle of practice, his body glistening with sweat. His focus is on the game, but his gaze flickered toward you for just a second, before he offered that cocky, irresistible smile of his.

You didn’t even need to speak. You just raise a finger and gesture for him to come over. The smile that spread across his face was everything.

You watched as he waved to Changbin and then jogged toward you. His damp shirt clung to his chest, the sweat dripping down his neck, and your pulse quickened as you realized how much you’ve been craving this moment.

When he reached you, he stood tall, wiping the sweat from his forehead with the back of his hand, his eyes never leaving yours. He was breathing heavily, but he still grinned and said, “You came to see me?”

You didn’t answer him with words. Instead, you took him away towards the back of the bleachers, pulled him closer by the collar of his shirt, and before he could even react, you pressed your lips to his.

The kiss was hot, to say the least. His lips moved with yours, needy and rough. You could taste the sweat on his lips, and it only makes you crave him more. He moaned softly into your mouth as you deepened the kiss, your fingers tangling in his damp hair. The taste of him had your head spinning, making you dizzy with desire.

He pulled back slightly, breathless but still grinning. You could feel his heart pounding against your chest, and you realized that you’ve caught him off guard. He wasn't expecting this.

“Did you miss me, Hyunjinnie?” You whispered against his lips.

“You have no idea.”

You pulled him in closer again, your lips brushing against his again. His eyes flickered with hunger.

You raised an eyebrow, fully aware of what you were doing to him.

“I'll be right back, don't move.” He said, turning and sprinting towards the field, and he was back in five minutes, his backpack on his shoulder.

“Your place or mine?” Was all he asked.

Yours was the closest, and you both were running now, all giggles and bright eyes. Stumbling into your dorm room, you pressed your body against his, your lips finding his again.

This time, the kiss is slower - more raw. The world outside disappears as his hands roamed down your body, pulling you closer to him. His touch was possessive and needy, as if he’d been waiting way too long for this.

His hands slid down to your hips, gripping you tightly as his lips left a trail of kisses down your neck. You moaned softly as his hands slipped under your shirt, grazing your skin, sending shivers through your body. Your fingers tugged at his jersey, trying to get it off, desperate to feel more of him.

He did it for you, taking it off and tossing it aside, revealing the toned muscles of his chest. Without warning, he lifted you off the ground, and you, though surprised, wrapped your legs around his waist as he carried you to the bed.

You fell back onto the bed together, his body covering you with his weight, and it felt so warm and safe. He kissed you again, and you could feel the bulge in his shorts pressing against you.

His hands moved with urgency, yanking your shirt off, and his lips were on your skin, kissing everywhere he could. The sensation of his lips on your skin, the heat of his breath - it was almost too much to bear.

He pulled off your pants and panties, impatiently. And you reached for his shorts, your hands trembling slightly as you pulled them down, eager to feel him. His breath hitched as you pushed them down, your fingers grazing his skin, and when your eyes met, you saw the hunger in his gaze.

“So beautiful-” Hyunjin was struggling to be gentle.

Hyunjin’s hands slid up your thighs, pushing your legs apart as he positioned himself between them. His lips found yours again, and you kissed him back, your hands fisting into his hair, tugging him closer.

Your eyes met and you nodded slowly, as he positioned his length at your entrance. As soon as he entered you, both of you let out a breath of relief - finally. The pressure was overwhelming. His pace was slow at first, teasing, until you’re begging for more.

“Hyunjin… please. Faster.” you moaned, and he smirked down at you, his pace picking up. His hands gripped your hips, holding you in place as he moved in and out of you with an intensity that made you whimper. Waves of pleasure crashed over you, your body trembling beneath him.

“Fuck, you feel so good, baby.” he growled, as your body arched up into him, your nails digging into his back as you felt yourself getting closer to the edge.

He watched you as he moved, and you knew he was enjoying the sight of you unraveling for him.

“Hyunjin... don’t stop. Don’t you dare stop.”

He grinned, his hands moving to your breasts, pinching and rolling your nipples as he thrust into you deeper, faster. Until finally, you couldn't take it anymore. Your entire body shook as your orgasm hit you hard, and you whimpered his name.

Hyunjin followed right after, his grip tightening on your hips as he moved even faster.

“Ah fuck-”

He pulled out just in time, his body shuddering with the force of his orgasm, as he spilled all over tummy. His head dropped to your chest as you both came down from the high.

The silence that followed was deafening for a moment before he looked up at you, his expression softening.

“That was… perfect.” he said, a beautiful smile lighting up his face.

You smiled back, and pulled him back down into a lazy kiss, your lips lingering as he wraps his arms around you, holding you close.

Later that evening, you held Hyunjin’s hand tightly as you approached the cafe where your friends were waiting for you both. Despite trying to keep things casual, you were both grinning like idiots.

Inside, your friends were crowded around a table, already halfway through their drinks. Jisoo spotted you first, narrowing her eyes and nudging Jennie. Jennie looks up from her coffee (behind which she was hiding, trying not to look at Changbin) and immediately froze.

Jisoo leaned back in her chair, arms crossed, smirking as she watched you and Hyunjin make your way over.

“Hi!” you chirped, waving excitedly.

“Hi,” Jisoo says dryly, her gaze flicking to your intertwined hands. “Are we pretending this is news, or...?”

Hyunjin smirked as he said, “Well, just to make it official...”

Jennie choked on her coffee, coughing so hard that Jisoo had to slap her on the back. Changbin just grinned.

“You don’t say,” Jisoo deadpanned. “And here I was, thinking you were just two extremely close friends, eye fucking each other every time you're in the same room.”

Hyunjin, entirely unfazed, said. “Yeah, sure. Friends. The kind of friends who-”

“Ok, let's sit!” You said quickly and Hyunjin slid into a chair at the table, yanking you down onto his lap.

You tried to wriggle off his lap, but he tightened his grip.

“There’s an empty chair right there,” you hissed, glancing at the unoccupied seat across the table.

“I don’t see it,” Hyunjin said innocently, his lips brushing against your ear.

Your friends groaned, but also looked really happy for you both.

As the table dissolved into chatter and laughter, and just then, Changbin cleared his throat.

Loudly.

Everyone turned to see him shifting awkwardly in his seat, his ears noticeably red. He looked around the table like he’s bracing himself for battle.

“I, uh...” Changbin started. “I have something to say.”

You and Jisoo immediately exchanged knowing grins, while Jennie stared at him in confusion.

Changbin glanced at Hyunjin, who gave him an encouraging nod. Then, he locked eyes with Jennie and said, “Jennie, I like you. A lot. And I've wanted to ask you this for so long…will you...um...would you like to go out for coffee sometime? Just us?”

The table fell silent. Jennie froze (again) like a deer in headlights, her coffee cup halfway to her lips. Her eyes darted to Jisoo, then to you.

“Before you think about running,” Changbin added quickly, “just know that Hyunjin is on standby. He’ll tackle you if you try.”

Hyunjin leaned back smugly, his arm still draped around you.

“He’s not kidding. I’d do it in a heartbeat.” Hyunjin teased.

Jennie’s jaw dropped as she gasped,“You - what?!”

She glared at all of you, her face turning bright red.

“You guys are insane,” she muttered, but looked back at Changbin, who was still watching her carefully.

And then, in a voice so soft it’s barely audible, she said,“Yes. I’d like that very much.”

The table erupted into cheers. Jisoo clapped happily, and you threw your arms around Jennie, who was still too stunned to react. Changbin grinned, looking like he just won the lottery.

The atmosphere was warm, full of laughter and love, and as you glanced around the table, you couldn't help but feel content.

Hyunjin’s arm tightened around you, his lips pressing against your temple.

“Told you we’d get here,” he whispered, his voice soft and full of affection.

You smiled, leaning into him. “You were right.”

And you were glad he was.

[fluentisonus]

working in a factory has you thinking so much about the insane chain of labor & transport that goes into making literally anything

[nsharks]

bleeding blue | part twenty-two preview

Five days. They're still here. You realize what's taking them so long; they're collecting food, drying meat into jerky and simmering wild strawberries into jams that Nereida cans. They have quite a lot of supplies with them. One of Kyle's backpack's is filled with ammo and another is stuffed with medicine. 

Kyle is easy to talk to. Nereida, too. Price—however—seems like he doesn't know what to think of you. Or maybe you're too insignificant to have crossed his mind much. 

That's fair. You don't need to all be friends.

Blue seems to like Ari. He's thirteen, two years older than her, which is evident in the way her head reaches his shoulders. She doesn't even say hi to you in the morning. Instead she shows him all her magazines and even the rabbits. He decides to name one Rocky, a friend for Grim. You can't be bothered; she needs another friend. Ghost isn't keen about them alone together, though. You heard him mutter to Kyle—keep an eye on him, Gaz.

The threat of summer starts to invite more and more sweat down your neck. Your hair has gotten so long. After tossing and turning on Ghost's bedroom floor, it became a nest of tangles. When Nereida, Ari, and Blue go for a dip in the pond, you go with them and soak it, then let the water settle so you can stare at your reflection. Blade sharpened, you saw a few inches off. Better. More practical. 

"I thought you were going to cut more," Blue comments.

"I don't want it that short, or else it's harder to braid."

As the two kids keep swimming, Nereida finds bunches of rosemary and seems more excited than you'd be about it. 

"It helps fight off odors," she explains when you ask. "Like when I have my period, so the Greys can't smell it as much."

When she puts it that way, you grab some, too. Then you start wondering about her and John. Do they have sex? They must. You've seen the way they are. Kisses to their shoulder and neck, arms around each other's waist. You've stared a few times only to catch yourself and quickly look away. How do they avoid pregnancy? You highly doubt either of them want to bring a new child into the world. You wouldn't.

Ari and Blue lay in the sun together. You scoot away to give them space, but overhear some of their conversation, anyway.

"Your dad is so cool."

Blue plays with a piece of her hair. "Oh? You think so?"

"Have you seen him? He's a beast. My uncle told me he got his name because no one could see him coming before he killed them."

"He can be a pain in my ass sometimes," Blue mutters. Her nose scrunches. "But he's taught me a lot of things. I'm pretty good with knives."

"Damn, I gotta see that."

She is beaming. "I'll show you when we get back."

Then, she leans over and whispers something in his ear. Whatever it is, he smiles and shakes his head in response.

She pulls away, sighing. "I wish you guys could just stay here."

Or maybe your dad will make us go with them, you think to yourself. In a way, it's comforting, that he is secretive with her, too. He still hasn't brought up the topic again. Either he hasn't decided, or he doesn't actually plan on keeping you updated. You try your best not to ruminate, but it's hard not to, especially when you have a hard time falling asleep on floorboards and are left with your thoughts in the dark. 

Which is why you're not feeling thrilled by the time you go into his room. He's already lying in bed, one hand bent behind his head while the other props open a book. He looks comfortable. Almost normal, even.

"How do you sleep with the mask on?" you remark, kicking off your shoes. 

His eyes lift from the page briefly. "Like a baby."

"How come Kyle has seen you without it and not me?"

His jaw flexes. "Jealousy doesn't suit you, Twix."

"And mental sanity doesn't suit you."

A light huff. Then, "Nice haircut."

When the room is dark, Ghost must get tired of hearing you toss and turn. He flicks on the small lamp, and you squint from the sudden light, stuffing the pillow over your head. There's shuffling before a hand rips the pillow from your face and tosses it onto the bed.

"Just get in the fucking bed. I won't bite." The sight of him standing above you, sweatpants low on his hips, consumes your vision. His voice is low but demanding.

"What, together?"

"I want good sleep. M'not going to get it on the floor, or listening to you up all night, so get in." His eyes peer down at you, half-lidded, before he lowly adds, "I'll be a gentleman, if you're worried."

You lift up and ignore the offer of his hand. "I'm not worried."

To protest would be embarrassingly juvenile when both him and you know you want to sleep there. Yet—your heart thickens. He watches as you crawl into the bed where the ceiling slants, tucking yourself under the quilt and curling against the very edge so that your knees float over it. The springs groan to your left and then heady warmth spills over you. Ghost keeps to his side, flat on his back, with his hands lying on his chest. His elbow pokes into your back no matter how carefully you try to inch away, and his thigh just barely brushes against your backside. 

The bastard doesn't say a word, nor does he make an effort to give you more space so you screw your eyes shut and fall asleep to the sound of his breathing. 

[ultraericthered]

#i got to screen Wish before it released during a school trip and let me tell you something #even though we noticed the glaring problems with that movie immediately #i also noticed something i dont think many others did at that time #there was so much talent and potential being held back. if you read closely you can pick up on a cry for help from the creatives behind it #i want to elaborate but i think if you know. you know #and if you don't.. this post does a good job of shining a light on a small part of that cry for you #despite its many issues i think i still liked Wish. Not because i think it was a good movie but bc i think it could have been a great one had circumstances been different. #my heart goes out to those who put their souls and everything they had into that movie and others in similar situations #some of the creators had given a small talk before the screening and to me they seemed very emotional about it #i think what many people forget is that nobody can see a project's flaws better than the people who worked on it #but what they also see and you can't is everything more it was meant to be #please remember that the core of many issues in any project is that the people with the talent often do not have power to call the shots

Yes, all of that. And I find it ironic that the gifed scene is the one that got people saying "Hey, King Magnifico's not really much of a villain, he's got a good point! He's just upholding his part of a social contract with his citizenry and doing what he, as king, needs to do to protect their wishes but also protect Rosas by ruling out granting any wishes that might backfire and have dangerous repercussions for the kingdom and the lives of the people! Asha's just an ignorant spoiled brat for demanding anything more of him! Magnifico Did Nothing Wrong!" So when you take that position on what you're being shown by the story and not scratching the surface to look at what Magnifico is doing in-universe by not giving back the wishes he knows he will not grant and knows the people who gave them to him cannot remember and what the out-of-universe subtext of this is, you're siding with the Disney Corporate Executive Overlords. You're siding with Bob Iger's "they're not being realistic with their expectations" argument. You're siding with Chapek and Iger's practices done under excuses like "It doesn't fit the Disney brand", "mass appeal stories over personal ones", "people don't want to go and pay to see movies with girly princess titles", etc. You're siding with their practices of dumping content straight to streaming (or onto Disney+ not too long after they've hit theaters or TV) even when that actually limits profits that the actual creative teams can make from their own work, of tampering with the artists visions and how the finished product turns out and then punishing those artists if it doesn't turn out well, and of ignoring ideas for original creations in favor of contiunally milking their popular (and profitable) existing IPs. You're siding with people who make up an entire entity that say loudly to the faces of all those who put in the work, the skills, the talent, the passion and dedication to create art and content they feel people deserve to enjoy, in the forms they deserve to enjoy them "I decide what everyone deserves!"

Capitalism errodes into a force for human evil when the people at the top prove susceptible to three things in excess beyond mere greed and self-interest: unchecked power, irresponsibility, and indecency. King Magnifico is allegorical for that evil, with a bit of a communist dictator angle to him too since that's the end point of those exact same excesses and extremes for socialism. He's a major problematic fave for all kinds of reasons, but anyone who wants to tell me he's a good guy can kindly GTFO.

Wish (2023) dir. Fawn Veerasunthorn, Chris Buck

hey do you think the overworked creatives about to go on strike are trying to tell us something

article sources under the cut

Mattson, Kelcie. "How Disney Almost Killed 'Nimona.'" Collider, January 2 2024.

Earl, William. "Shelving Batgirl Was the Right Decision, Says New DC Studios Head Peter Safran: 'It Would Have Hurt DC.'" Variety, January 31 2023

Couch, Aaron. "Warner Bros. Reverses Course on 'Coyote vs. Acme' After Filmmakers Rebel." The Hollywood Reporter, November 13 2023.

Ridgely, Charlie. "Scoob! Sequel Director Revealed Film Was 'Very Close' to Completion Before HBO Max Cancellation." comicbook.com, August 2 2022.

Clark, Travis. "Staffers at the animation studio Blue Sky say it's 'heartbreaking' that Disney canceled its final movie, 'Nimona.'" Business Insider, February 18, 2021.

Harrison, Mark. "Why was the Batgirl movie cancelled?" Yahoo! Entertainment, January 31 2024.

Amidi, Amid. "Warner Bros. Shelves Fully-Completed 'Coyote Vs. Acme' For Tax Write-Off." Cartoon Brew, November 9 2023.

Lee, Alex. "Why Netflix keeps cancelling your favourite shows after two seasons." Wired UK, September 28 2020.

Tyrrell, Gary. "We All Knew It Was Coming." fleen.com, February 10 2021.

"Warner Bros. Reverses Course on ‘Coyote vs. Acme’ After Filmmakers Rebel." see: 3.

Bergeson, Samantha. "Warner Bros. Will Let 'Coyote Vs. Acme' Filmmakers Shop Movie to Other Distributors." IndieWire, November 13 2023.

Strapagiel, Lauren. "Disney's First Feature Animated Movie With Queer Leads May Never Be Released." BuzzfeedNews, February 24 2021.

"We All Knew It Was Coming." see: 9

@/scottderrickson. "I think it’s absolute bullshit that a studio can and does shelve the creative work of hundreds of people for a fucking tax break." Twitter, 10 Nov. 2023, 4:52 p.m..

[niechys]

I'm sorry. I'm so not sorry but also so so so sorry. But I can't stop thinking about it.

from @keferon tf mecha universe

(Also if you don't want me tagging you please do tell. I didn't want to bother, just want to credit cuz it's glorious)

it's because of this post.

Happened after This event

I'm sorry in advance for all the grammatical errors.

I also don't know wo else would be the science guy to take this position of explaining the thing. I feel like there has to be someone else that's not Shockwave too. Sorry to all of Brainstorm's fans out there. I think he's not a bad guy. Just too excited for the possibilities.

---------------------------------

Something lingers inside that mech. Although there is no hard evidence of a human soul or spirit or ghost haunting it, most people who had anything to do with Vortex agreed that it was best to believe its first pilot never leave the cockpit of his mech. After all, nothing else would explain the freak accidents constantly killing all but the latest pilot.

Human are prone to be superstitious. It's normal to believe in something like ghost in the machine, really.

But one would not think a man of sciences such as Shockwave would take the rumors seriously. No one knows if the scientist really believe it or not. He

Regardless of the rumors' validity, it sure did inspired him.

"You're kidding me" Swindle stood, blinked, looked at the incomplete repair of Blurr's mech then back to the technician in front of him. Brainstorm was prattling on at speed faster than Blurr's F1 record.

"Not kidding. Why would I kid? This is a great breakthrough. Lives can be saved and there are much we could do with the tech, I don't know why it never occurs to me or Shockwave that the neural link tech could have been used in this way---"

Swindle turned his brain off during all the scientific mumbo jumbo all and only really heard him again at "It's nothing all that weird really. Some people disagree, but you can't go against Shockwave when he put his mind to it. If you think about it, it's just like Vortex"

"What?" Swindle blinked again.

"Vortex. That mech, I mean the mech's first pilot, crazy psycho, crazy good at slicing up kaijus"

"I know who Vortex was. I worked here when he started piloting. What did that asshole has to do with this?"

"Oh, everything. If, a big if. If that guy's consciousness was still in the mech like people been saying"

"Haunted" Crossing his arms, he narrowed his eyes at Brainstorm. The technician corrected him.

"Lingering consciousness. Either way, Blurr is in much better shape than Vortex. Brain still intact . So is most part of his body. We wired him to the neural link to allow him control of the mech. So when we are ready, he can still go about his task from within that mech"

"What . The . Fuck"

Swindle's eyebrow twitched. No, it's NOTHING like Vortex's case. The asshole died and probably refused to leave this world. Blurr, on the other hand, was still alive. Sure he wouldn't be the same. Maybe he would be scarred for life, paralyzed from the waist down or something. But hardwiring a person to a mech?

"So, you were working with Blurr before now, correct? That's why we would like to bring you in as his handler. Not like you have to do maintenances and stuff, just take care of him and, the publicity and all that. Like being his manager" With that, Brainstorm handed him a folder before excusing himself.

The guy wasn't bad most of the time, Swindle thought. But sometimes, just sometimes, his passion for science overshadowed the moral compass.

Like how he wished that his own greed would take precedented in his state of mind. They must have thought he would jump at the chance to milk more profit from Blurr. Hell, he wouldn't be feeling this bad if that was the case.

He wanted to refuse. Profit be damn, even he didn't feel right. Blurr saved them. He should be allowed to preserved his humanity, his dignity. Not preserving his brain in a jar inside a mech. If the pilot died and the mech is reparable, you find a new pilot. If the pilot lived but can no longer pilot, you also find a new pilot. Not..this.

But refusing means they will bring someone else on board to manage Blurr. He's pretty sure he wouldn't like that.

Fuck

------------------

**note. Blurr is not reduced to brain in a jar. Most of his body is intact, just hard wired to the mech.

I tink they can add robot parts to him later all stuff. But since they probably value Blurr as a money cow pilot first. If they can't use his face, they can still use his mech.

Sorry again ehehehehehehehehehe

[mydarlingclaudia]

every word I meant to say

note : ermmmm hi. don't ask where I went for like almost a month work is eating me alive and I was sad. this was inspired by that the unsent project thing andddd idk if I really like this it's def ooc but I was thinking about it again today and this has been in my drafts since September so I figured why not

wc : 2.1k

tags : @luvrgreyy @clitorphosis @sonya-semyonova

desc : letters that went unsent. kind of unrequited love, angst (???), more Leon focused, re2r!Leon - DI!Leon, fem!reader, ooc, not proofread

"I meant to write sooner, I really did. I know it's been a year, my life is so different now, I don't think you'd even believe me if I tried to explain it. I hope you're doing better than I am, I'm happy you weren't able to move to the city with me."

Leon hasn't written a letter since, what, his first few years in the academy? Maybe the end of his senior year of high school? He can't really remember, but he knows that this letter is important because it's to you, his friend he hasn't seen since the night he left for Raccoon City. This isn't even an actual letter, he's scribbling out what he thinks might be good excuses as to why he hasn't talked to you in a year on the back of pieces of scrap paper he took from the office.

He's supposed to be asleep right now, same as everyone else in boot camp, but it's been a year since Raccoon City and he's wondering if you ever tried to reach him. Maybe you tried to go to Raccoon City to look for him, only to see the pile of rubble that stood in its place, sectioned off by the government. Maybe you thought he was dead, he wouldn't blame you.

You and Leon had stuck together all throughout high school, even managed to stay friends when he went off to the police academy and you moved a few hours away for college. He doesn't even know if your address is still the same, he really hopes it is, there's no phone-books in boot camp if he wanted to try and call you, you're supposed to have your loved ones numbers memorized.

The last time Leon saw you was the night before he was supposed to move to the city, before he got a letter in the mail the next morning telling him not to come in, he really wishes he had listened. You were so happy for him, starting out as a city cop was a big deal and he had worked so hard to get there, you and a few friends had thrown him a going-away-party, telling him not to forget you once he got to the city. Leon couldn't forget you if he tried.

You had talked about moving to the city with him for a short period of time, it was really just ramblings the two of you kept bringing up. "Oh, when we live in the city..." "I can come visit you at work..." "I'll handle dinner, you'll handle cleaning..." Nothing ever really came of those ideas, but it gave him a warm feeling in his stomach knowing you wanted to come to the city with him.

He hopes you’ve been well, that life has been kinder to you than it has to him. Leon hopes you got that job you were gushing about the last time he saw you, he hopes you still think of him on his birthday because he thinks of you often.

He shouldn’t have gone to Raccoon City, he should’ve stayed home the day he left and instead stopped by your house to bother you about going to see a movie. Or he should have taken you to lunch, anything would’ve been better than walking into a city that was beyond saving.

"I’m not really sure what I’m saying, but I know I miss you. How have you been? I hope I’m able to come and visit soon, everything’s been moving so fast, but I’ll figure something out. Maybe we can get dinner, or something. Whatever you want, I’ll pay for it, don’t worry."

Leon's hands shake a tiny bit when he thinks of you, it's that school boy nervousness that movies portray whenever there's a boy with a crush on a girl who he knows is probably too out of his league. You were friends, at least.

"You're done with school now, right?" He knows you are. "I wish I was there for the graduation ceremony, I know your parents are proud. Do you remember my graduation party? Someone spiked the punch and we both ended up passed out in the bathtub at your house, you looked really pretty that night. I hope your graduation was better than mine. This would probably have been better as a phone call, but I don't know, you said letters were always more thoughtful.

– Leon"

–

That letter never got sent. Every letter needs an envelope, Leon just never got around to finding one, but he kept that scrap piece of paper tucked inside his pillowcase on the odd chance that he got his hands on one. He had stricter rules to follow than the other recruits, being legally dead and all.

But even after he got out of boot camp, he kept the letter. It's hidden away in some drawer in his house, he's not sure where, though.

He didn't make it into the army, he's not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing, but being in the position he was in now wasn't much better. He's stronger now, hardened, more mature.

Leon's written a few more letters to you over the years, ones that still never got sent because he either deemed them unworthy or because he became unsure of himself halfway through writing it. But he hasn't thrown any of them away, he'll send them one day, he swears it.

Leon's not using you as a way of journaling, either, even though he should find some way to actually write down his thoughts to get them out of his head. What he writes to you is mostly memories, telling you that his life keeps changing and that he misses you. He knows you're different by now, too. You're both grown, no longer in high school, no longer in college or the academy. If he could turn back time, go anywhere other than Raccoon City, he would. He thinks that's selfish of him, him not being there would've left Claire and Sherry in that city, but how would he have even known?

"Me again, hope you're doing better than I am." Leon's way with words gets worse and worse by the week, not that he cares. "I met someone who kind of reminded me of you, she's a sweetheart, like you. You'd probably become fast friends if you were ever able to meet."

Leon's not allowed to tell you about his mission in Spain, or about the president's daughter. President Graham is putting more body-guards in place for his daughter once she steps foot in D.C. again, Leon's sure the president considered appointing Leon as one of them at some point since breaking the news that she was going to be coming back home safely.

Leon should stop thinking about you so much, it's not like you were his only friend in the world, you've probably forgotten him, anyway.

"My life is still different, but yours probably is, too. This probably sounds stupid, but I miss being in high school. You probably don't, your mom was up your ass all the time and you worked yourself to the bone. Has that changed at all?

I remember that one year I went to Thanksgiving at your house, your uncles were all drunk and your cousins kept trying to get me to come sit with them, your grandpa was trying to get me interested in football. I haven't had a holiday like that since then, your family was always really nice to me."

He's not sure what to say anymore, these letters always just end up dragging out, but Leon has a lot of memories and he hopes you think of them as often as he does.

"I'm sorry I haven't visited. It's harder for me to get time off of work these days, even though I could really fucking use it. I promise one day I'll come back, it's just not going to be for a little while. Just don't do anything dumb.

– Leon"

–

Those letters he's been writing you have piled up in the drawer of his nightstand.

He's definitely sure that your address has changed by now, you're probably not even in the same state anymore. He could always try to find you on Facebook, explain everything that's been building up over the years in a simple text, but there's still rules he's supposed to follow even in his personal life.

Leon didn't stop writing, though. The letters did eventually get shorter, he's not sure if you like the same things anymore or if you'd even be interested.

He writes now mostly about how different his life would be if he was with you, if he had just asked you out in high school or kissed you the night he was supposed to leave for Raccoon City. It almost feels real to him when he goes to sleep, but that might just be the alcohol numbing his brain, not the dream of you sleeping next to him or the feeling of your breath on the back of his neck, not even the little pitter-patter off tiny footsteps coming from down the hallway.

It does make him feel a bit pathetic, dreaming of a life with someone he hadn't talked to in years. Leon can't help but think of you, he always thought you were pretty, and the past always lives in the back of his mind, but it comes alive late at night.

You're an entirely different person by now, someone who he hasn't had the opportunity to meet yet. You're probably married, maybe you even have a few kids running around, Leon's jealous of that. That could've been him, but it's not. But he's not even sure if you'd recognize each other if you passed by on the street, so is it even worth it to dwell on all the maybe's?

"I'm not sure I'll get to visit you for a while, not without a lucky fucking twist of fate, anyway."

All these letters are starting to sound the same, but Leon clings onto the thought of someday sending them to whatever corner of the country you were hiding in and hoping that there's still room in your life for a stranger.

"Do you still want me over for dinner? You don't know what I'd give to just eat a shitty meal with you right now."

You don't know what he'd give to do anything with you, really. He knows that there's a lifetime worth of things he's missed out on and that maybe every once in a while you think about him in the same way he thinks about you.

"I don't know how to ask this, but are you married? I know you'd look stunning in a wedding dress." You probably are, you're a catch, who wouldn't want to put a ring on your finger? Your husband's probably a better man than he is, too. One who hasn't had years worth of trauma jammed into his brain with the proof of it marked across his body, your husband probably takes you out on a date every week, maybe even surprises you with breakfast in bed and kisses the nape of your neck to gross out your kids. "I really hope you're happy, in my head you are.

I wanted that to be us, I never told you, but I was a chicken-shit kid and didn't know how to say it. You show up in my dreams sometimes, you deserve nothing but the best. I meant to get back in touch with you forever ago, but I think it's probably too late.

– Leon"

–

Two years after his last letter and Leon's still thinking of you, seventeen years after Raccoon City and the image of you sitting across from him for the last time still loops in his mind. He doesn't really remember your voice but he knows that you thought handwritten letters were romantic, and he still reads over the ones he meant to send to you but kept avoiding.

He's done with the letters, hasn't written one in a long time. But he just got back from California and your old favorite song is playing on the radio, and he's remembering how in love he is with your memory.

"I don't know what I'm doing. I'm too old for this and I'm sure you'd tease me if we had somehow kept in touch. I don't blame you if you thought I died in Raccoon City, I hope you're still alive and that life is good to you.

You were always important to me, I think you've given me something to cling to over the years. This letter won't find you and I'm not even really sure if I want it to, but I hope you'd still call me if you were able to. You wouldn't believe the things I've seen, but I'm happy you never got to see them.

Love, Leon

p.s. I'd say I love you but it feels like something you'd say in person"

[celaenaeiln]

I always assumed that from the comics I've read dick seems to have a somewhat complicated relationship with his own gender/sexuality/sex status, etc.

Anon!! You can't just drop this on me and leavee!! I need to hear more!! LEMME HEAR YOUR THOUGHTS!!!

Ok so this is gonna be like three different things so I'll make subcategories.

Gender

Of the things listed. I think gender is the one thing Dick is rather set on/secure about. He has some feminine or softer traits which typically would not be associated with a male character such as empathy and caring to an overemotional aspect -

Joker: Last Laugh Issue #3

Nightwing (1996) Issue #86

Nightwing (1996) Issue #139

Being overly kind to an unappreciative and toxic girlfriend is one thing, but as a brother hugging and kissing a brother? It's a little softer than how people usually write male heroes.

He's male and I don't think he's considered switching to the female side because he's comfortable with his masculinity.

Does he do things like this -

Nightwing (2016) Issue #38

sometimes? Yeah. He takes the female role in his relationships with others such as Bruce and Barbara but he still very much sees himself as masculine. Like I said in another post, Kori asks him to be a male consort to her Queen because she was forced to marry a royal Tamaranian Prince. While male consorts are not unusual in history, they typically embody the female in a stereotypical relationship. (On a separate note, did you know Chinese emperors took on male consorts? It is circumvented when speaking about in the present and laters days but it's officially written down in the books).

But overall, Dick is very much a masculine male with feminine qualities.

Sexuality

Ok so the thing about Dick and sexuality is that Dick Grayson is a very, VERY old character. He's been there since the beginning of DC to the point that he was the third DC character created EVER. Clark, then Bruce, then Dick, AND THEN Wonder Woman.

So with a character this old and with a topic as controversial as sexuality, DC is not going to ever explicitly write Dick as gay or bi or whatever. Why? Because Dick is an icon.

When someone says "Batman and Robin" - EVERYONE knows who Batman and Robin is. Bruce Wayne and Dick Grayson. They've existed forever and are the kingpins of DC alongside Superman and Wonder Woman. Whether that person is in the fandom or not, they know who Batman and Robin are. Within the fandom, people know there's more than one Robin (several) but talking to someone outside the fandom, someone who enjoys DC casually, only thinks there is one Robin. And you could tell them that there's this many robins, some have been girls, there's this many timelines and etc (which is actually a really embarrassing convo if someone isn't in the fandom OMG and how I wish I could take that back and erase it from BOTH OF OUR MEMORIES) - but they're not gonna care. Because for them, there's only one Robin and that's Dick Grayson.

So with something like that, DC cannot have Dick Grayson be anything but straight because it would cause too big of an uproar. So he can't be. Explicitly. People have written him as having an ambiguous sexuality though. I actually wrote this specific POST a long time because someone wanted to know more.

Instead what you'll have is a BUNCH of BROMANCES. His Nightwing authors have wanted more male/male sexual attractions with him and other characters and some of them have admitted that openly even if they were not allowed to write. So if you're reading a comic that has him and something seems SUS, well it might just be.

So like with all things, I cannot say anything for certain unless there is evidence of him engaging in a romantic relationship with someone who isn't a woman, but given the homoerotic tension that exists between him and other characters such as ROY -

Outsiders (2003) Issue #11

Teen Titans: Silver Age TPB 2 (Part 4) Page 16

Nightwing (1996) Issue #114

WHICH IS ODDLY SIMILAR TO THIS -

Nightwing (1996) Issue #138

I'd say he's bi-curious at the least.

Sex Symbol Status

-this is my previous post which goes a little into the sex symbol thing

Anon, holy crap I have an ESSAY for you. It's in my drafts because it's wayyyyyyyyy too long and I'll definitely exceed the image limit but holy crap.

Here's what I will say about it though. The world REVERES Dick for his looks and body. The amount of attention he gets for his beauty is ridiculous. Even Green Arrow's half-sister - WHO'S MUCH YOUNGER THAN DICK AND I DON'T EVEN KNOW IF DICK MET - dreams about him romantically.

Green Arrow (2016) Annual_1

Because of course. Villains are going out of their way to compliment him on his looks in the middle of a fight - Bane, Bludhaven villains, civilians (MALE) coworkers - it's literally insane.

So Dick is clearly the hottest and most gorgeous thing to ever exist in the entirety of DC. There's also a panel from a comic where Dick becomes Talon AND SOMEONE STILL CALLS HIM THE PRETTY BOY TALON LIKE WTF??? THAT PRETTY BOY TALON CAN RIP OFF YOUR HEAD IN A HEARTBEAT! He's a talon, too! Clearly death does not hinder his looks in any way.

But Dick himself is VERY uncomfortable any sort of bodily attraction. It's not just the comments that gets him but he, who everyone claims has the body of a god, doesn't feel good about his own body.

The New Titans (1988) Issue #71

He's really conservative. And in another comic when Tim comments on how the the Nightwing suit is really a babe attractor, Dick is uncomfortable going 'I didn't make it for them'.

Like even looking at this comic pic where Dick is in disguise and he and Kori are just walking down the street, they both still attract the entire street's attention. It must be so uncomfortable.

Here's my thoughts on the sex symbol status. Yes, Dick is a sex symbol. That's just fact. But here's where the issue is. People can be sex symbols without it affecting their personality because that status, is something given to them or bestowed upon them by another person.

I'm leaning a little into my post in the drafts but Johnny Depp, Marylyn Monroe, David Bowie, Tom Cruise, Cleopatra - they're all so vastly different on their opinions of sexual liberty and yet all of them as considered sex symbols.

So what does this mean for Dick? Nothing, really. It just means the world takes one look at him and wants him but he is under no obligation to follow through nor does he. He's not a slut for sleeping with the people he likes and no one thinks of him that way either. He was slut-shamed after his rape by Pantha who always has some harsher opinions because that is her personality. She literally says the meanest things about everyone because she's a rough and tough character and she finds humor in being mean because she is who she is.

For Dick himself, it means nothing. He doesn't view himself as attractive which ironically is also what celebrities who were interviewed about the sex symbol status said as well, such as Johny Depp.

The problem with being beautiful though is that people brush you off. Certain girlfriends of his do it. They see him as just a pretty boy and writers of certain comics *cough* Batgirl comics writers and Tom Taylor *cough* throw his skills and talent down the garbage disposal so he can act as a dumb pretty boy toy for his girlfriend. His personality is degraded to a bland white paste and his intelligence and power and pain are thrown out the window.

(This POST gives some examples of when writers do this for Dickbabs)

Like this is a serious problem! I read this article some time ago -

Here are the main highlights:

There isn't a problem with Dick being ascribed a sex symbol status and to his great benefit most people don't treat him like this but some do! LIKE HIS GIRLFRIEND.

In summary, and I'm gonna borrow a lyric here to quote -

"It's hell on earth to be heavenly Them's the breaks, they don't come gently"

I think the problem is, instead of focusing on how beautiful Dick looks, I really feel like DC and the fandom should analyze how uncomfortable Dick gets, how certain comics force him into relationships when others clearly show he wouldn't be interested in a parallel situation, and mostly how Dick Grayson is robbed of his personality, identity, and beliefs all because of how people believe he should act due to his beauty.

I'm honestly tired of the equation that Dick's status as a sex symbol somehow reduces him to a slut. He is not. Instead we should focus on how his beauty is weaponized against him. He was born with those looks and complaining about them is useless. That's his mother and father-given appearance. It's his genetic inheritance. It's as much a part of his as his grace or his unyielding kindness.

The real issue isn't DC’s acknowledgment of his beauty—it's the utter failure to dig deeper. Instead we should explore how Dick deals with it. How does he carry the weight of being constantly objectified? What does it do to his relationships? How is he coerced to do something in a relationship because it is expected of simply due to the fact that he's beautiful? We should explore how people (even the batfam sometimes) only see his smile or good-natured humor while his complexities - his pain, his resilience, his brilliance - are shucked aside? He's constantly diminished by the fandom and canon because of his cheery personality and good looks just to fit a particular character's narrow view of him.

Call him pretty! Dick legit doesn't care if villains call him pretty or someone calls him that because what they're really focused on when they call him that, are his skills. He doesn't mind being called pretty, beautiful, gorgeous - as long as he's valued for his talents and efforts and skills.

(Here's the pretty boy post for my lovelies. Part 2 in the making)

The issue, once again, isn't his sex symbol status or his looks. It's literally everything else. Dick Grayson is not a reflection of what others project; he is a someone who stands apart, vibrant, and irreducibly whole. Which too often gets lost underneath his looks.

[glitteringdust]

Rookanis request: Something where they actually talk about Spite and set boundaries or whatever for their relationship? I *really* wish the game had mentioned that at some point (also I’m just interested in seeing how folks handle it in their stories).

All Spite wants is Rook’s touch.

Ever since she’d started thanking the demon directly for his help, he’d been head over heels at every interaction.

She sees us. She talked to me! Let me talk to her.

It was hard enough for Lucanis to separate his own wants from Spite’s, when they aligned this close. Rook was always giving praise honestly where it was due yet Spite had such a craving for it, it was hard to contain. On top of that, the demon began to crave the usual high fives, the handshakes—any brief moment they were close Spite almost buzzed along the crow's nerves with interest.

Lucanis however…found the thought of her touch much more complicated than that.

The very thought of her touch stoked a desire within, one he could not indulge in while there was a job to do. Entanglements such as this were detrimental to an assassin. Even more so with an overeager demon tugging at the chains.

Then they'd almost kissed.

Exchanged heated glances, after that. Thanks to Spite, he knew the exact number of footsteps it took for Rook to get to his room from the eluvian. He knew what those footsteps sounded like, light against the stone floor. A distinct rhythm, not unlike a heart beat at rest.

It doesn't surprise him, when she knocks twice and enters the room. The last ten steps have her standing before his seated spot on the bed.

It does surprise him, when she runs a finger under his chin, pulling his gaze to hers.

“Stop me, if this is not what you want.”

As she moves forward, he moves back until she is straddling him, his back inches from the wall. Her weight is welcome against him, anticipation tingling along his skin as her breath ghosts over his face.

Rook was so close. So close.

She was going to kiss him, a fact he was only just becoming aware of when her lips meet his.

Mierda.

Lucanis kisses her in a calculated way, slow and specific and bleeding a kind of desire he’d never afford himself usually. He wanted to get each one right, savoring this moment as long as he could. He rests one hand along the small of her back, and cradles her head with the other as he tastes her lips again and again. He can't help the pleased sound that escapes as she runs her fingers along his temples, and then through his hair.

Everything is abuzz, every nerve and inch of him consumed by her. He can barely feel the shift in the air, the scent of blackberry and ozone dancing along his tongue. The fingers in his hair grip him tighter, Rook's breath quickening as his lips travel from her mouth down her jaw, along her neck, teeth grazing her throat and the junction between shoulder and neck…

“Lucanis.”

She's pushing him away, albeit so, so gently. He grunts out what he hopes is acknowledgement, untangling the haze over his mind. Brown eyes meet her blue, and as he regains a sense of reality he releases the grip his one hand had on her hair.

They both catch their breath.

“That was not only you, kissing me just now.”

He goes still. Rook makes no move to leave his lap, arms still draped around his neck and gaze nothing but soft.

“Spite has always been intrigued by you, but he knows what I feel, too. It's… hard to explain.”

“Does it bother you, what Spite thinks of me?”

He doesn't answer for a moment.

“Sometimes, it's hard to know where he ends and I begin. Especially when we agree on something.”

Rook tastes good. Feels good.

“Sharing a body must only make that worse.”

“It amplifies it. Makes what I feel more real than anything.” He looks away briefly, “What he and I feel for you… cannot be separated anymore. Are you okay with that?”

She doesn’t even hesitate, “I am. Are you?”

Most of his life had been decided for him by Caterina. Lucanis had very little say in most of the things he’d faced, and he’d faced betrayal and possession by a demon. If it hadn’t been for Rook’s understanding and kindness, where would he even be?

For the first time in his life, this choice was up to him.

"I want you, Khalia, with all that I am."

He'd ask the demon what he thought, but the only decisions Spite wanted to make were new places to kiss Rook. The buttons of her shirt had almost succumbed to Spite's clumsy fingers, but demons lacked dexterity.

Next time, we tear it open.

“Spite, can you not? Mierda.”

Rook laughs, “What's he saying?”

“Thinking of new places to kiss you. He's mad you have so many buttons.”

A cheeky grin, one that sets his insides fluttering, “Well, I can't say I don't like where that's going.”

She leans in, capturing his mouth in hers again. Nimble fingers slowly work their way along those buttons.

He could do this all day.

[ylangelegy]

omg "what? me? jealous? never." with junhui please! 🫶🫶

ⵌ actor!jun x actress!reader. ⵌ word count: 988. ⵌ notes: co-stars, secret relationship, pet names ('pretty girl'), suggestive joke, all my favorite tropes in a drabble. i miss this man sooo bad.

Jun loves award shows.

He loves having an excuse to dress up, loves getting to interact with other groups a little more openly, loves the special stages they get to put on. And if his gorgeous girlfriend happens to be a special emcee, well— that only makes it a much better night.

He's not allowed to be too excited, of course. He's always careful not to blow his cover. At most, the boys just seem to assume that you're his favorite co-star.

If only they knew that Jun's had the privilege of your heart for the past couple of years.

There's a bit of a thrill in sneaking around, in having to pull out his acting chops. Tonight, Jun lies about having to go to the bathroom, fields Minghao's invites for accompaniment, and navigates through all the other tables. Your text had been the only prompting he needed. It's like a waltz; his eyes on your back, the distance he keeps.

You side step in to a corner, behind a curtain, and he follows. The entire venue of idols, of actors, of Korea's biggest stars are none the wiser.

Jun's hands find immediate purchase at your waist. "Hey, pretty girl," he greets smoothly, that bright smile of his already lighting up his face.

You'll probably only have three minutes, but three minutes is all that Jun needs. He doesn't waste time. "Saw you on the red carpet earlier. You were stunning," he hums, his face going to nuzzle the underside of your ear.

"I think you're a little bit biased," you shoot back, unable to resist a jab. Your facade of annoyance is betrayed by the smile that's threatening to fill your own face. "But I think I can let it pass for tonight, 'specially since that suits of yours looks so good on you."

"I'd look even better out of it," he says unrepentantly. His arms tighten around your waist, holding you close when you try to pull back and away.

You let out a groan. Jun laughs softly.

Jun's lips brush against your jaw, then down the line of your throat. His nose skims your skin as he takes a breath. "You smell nice," he mumbles.

Cinnamon, sugar, vanilla. The same scent as his own cologne.

"You got me this at your Japan stop," you answer, your hands resting at his hips. It's not much, but it'll have to do for now.

"I should get you a perfume every time we have a stop abroad," he says.

"Yah, don't do that. You have expensive tastes. And you already get me too many things whenever you're on tour."

"What's the point of being an established artist at my big age if I can't spoil my pretty girl a little?" he grumbles petulantly. He tilts his head to press a kiss over your pulse. "Besides," he adds after a moment, "I like that you smell like me."

Smelling like Jun was just another one of those things. His subtle reminders in the form of innocuous couple items that only the two of you knew about. Cologne and perfume with similar notes, matching silk pajamas, rubber shoes from the same line. A quiet litany of mine, mine, mine in your every day lives.

You give a bright, warm laugh as you mumble into his hair, "I'll wear it more often, then."

You are so bad for him. A walking, talking dopamine rush. Everything about you makes Jun feel a little lightheaded, a little dizzy. Like he's had one too many to drink.

But you're also the one who sobers him up, the one who always says, "We should probably get going."

"Do we have to?" he whines. His arms around you tighten. He knows the answer to his question— yes, yes, you have to go. But he can't help wishing otherwise. "Five more minutes?"

Your nth sigh of the night. Even then— "Five more minutes," you concede.

His hands flatten out against your back, holding you more snugly against him. He could stay like this forever. Just your warmth against him, the scent of you in his nose, the sound of your steady breaths in his ear.

But you say five more minutes. And so he counts down from ten in his head. Ten, nine, eight…

Jun pulls back after the countdown and steals a long, deep kiss from your lips.

This was what it felt like to be alive. The way his blood pumped faster, his heart thumped harder. The way that your very presence made everything else seem dull in comparison.

The feeling only intensifies when you move closer. When you arch against him in that way you know he loves. When your fingers run through his hair.

Jun is all but breathless. He pulls away after long enough, leaning his forehead against yours. "I'm a terrible influence on you," he pants against your lips.

Your hand slides down to his face, your thumb ghosting over his mouth. "You got some on you," you grumble, and it takes him a moment to realize that you're fretting over lip gloss.

"Leave it," he says. "I like smelling like perfume and looking like I got kissed."

You shoot him a glare. He gives you cheeky grin.

When the two of you part, Jun is relegated to watch you from his table. You're radiant up on stage, perfectly composed and charming. You have stellar manufactured chemistry with your more recent co-star, and some of the boys decide to tease Jun about it.

"Looks like you've gotten replaced, Junpi," Jeonghan sing-songs.

Soonyoung nudges Jun in the side. "Jealous that you've lost your favorite co-star to Kim Soohyun?"

Jun barely stops himself from bursting into laughter. Replaced? Co-star? His members don't know the half of it. Jun absentmindedly runs a thumb over his bottom lip, where traces of you still linger.

"What? Me, jealous?" He breaks out into an innocent smile. "Never."

୨ৎ * part of my ( JEALOUSY ) DRABBLE GAME.

[siriusblackdevotee]

Sirius + forced Jegulus break up

...I want Sirius walking in on Jegulus and then forces them to break up, without realizing it was a break up because he thought they were just friends with benefits.

Like, he knows Regulus, he knows James and he knows his own platonic feelings for James. He just knew that eventually Regulus would see why Sirius was so attached to James. They were two peas in a pod in that craving-for-affection department.

And if they were fucking, he just knew Regulus would eventually fall for James.

It would be great for both of his brothers to actually date (...what a sentence), he'd actually prefer that and thought they'd be a match made in beaven. But unfortunately, last he checked, James was not interested in Regulus or anyone for that matter. He would have told him otherwise, right?

So it was going to end horribly on Regulus's end so by that logic, he forced them to end it. He didn't think he did anything wrong, in fact he pats himself on the back as he basically prevented his brother's future heartbreak.

He would say something like "he's not good for you/you're not good for him/I just know this wouldn't end well." He'd be very evasive or vague about it because obviously, he can't say "my brother might fall for you/you might fall for James"

But then it'd also be said in a way that... to James and Regulus, who thinks Sirius knows about their relationship now, he has no hope for them?? Does not trust them?? Does not believe in them?? Or doesn't like them for the other?? Or does not like them??

Basically they hear "You aren't good for each other." And it like, fucks them up because it's coming from Sirius. He matters to both of them immensely and by extension, his opinion.

Regulus thinks Sirius is disapproving him for James. Can't be James because James is the embodiment of the sun and he can't be bad for anyone so it must be him.

It's him that's incompatible and could somehow hurt James in the future and that's one of his already existing biggest fears or that he wouldn't be good enough for James which is his insecurity. So Sirius saying that further solidifies it??

Whereas James obviously doesn't think that because he personally knows Sirius would never think of his brother that way and he knows Sirius physically can't think of the worst of himself.

So to him Sirius' disapproval meant it was about their relationship. He didn't want them dating and if James didn't have Sirius's approval, he can't be with Regulus at all. No going behind Sirius' back either because the guilt was far too much to handle compared to the pleasure of being in Regulus' company.

So they...break up and Sirius is happy that they stop fucking!! He stays oblivious to the hurt and chaos he caused!!

When he notices Regulus Not Doing Well, he just brushes it off as him being upset he couldn't have James or that he was already slightly falling for James and wishes he could be closer.

He only realizes he may have fucked up when James, who should not be in love with his brother, is no longer his usual sunshine self.

Not really relevant to this...drabble thing but on the side wolfstar? Remus who knew about Jegulus for a while and even helped hide it from Sirius?

The couple were still new and figuring things out, wasn't sure if they'd work out and needed privacy, adding Sirius to the mix would just add more pressure and they didn't want that.

Remus didn't like hiding things from Sirius but he also loves James and Regulus so the deal was Jegulus immediately come clean once they see that the relationship was indeed going somewhere.

And yeah he thought once Jegulus revealed their relationship, there would be some dramatic rejection-but-not-actually-rejection speech from Sirius but he thought Sirius would be overjoyed for them once he calmed down.

So he'd be completely blindsided when he hears that not only did Sirius find out but he also completely forbid them from seeing each other like that.

He's like?? Yo?? That's not my boyfriend?? Did I miscalculate??

Okay well I haven't day dreamed this far into my...daydream. so Remus tries to understand Sirius and is shocked by his flippant "ehh, they'll get over it" attitude. Maybe they fight because Remus cares about James, and he can't believe Sirius would do something like that???

And he tries convincing Sirius too but Sirius isn't hearing any of it.

It's only when Sirius comes to talk to Remus about James' sad energy that they both realize the misunderstanding. Then Sirius fixes his mistake and happy ending!!

I have more regulus angst to add to this but I'm tired now, so the yappathon ends here

[blackcatplushie]

Yandere in an Apocalypse

warnings: gun, blood, some violence

male yandere x reader

You run as fast as you can into the forest night. It's so dark outside you can barely see what's in front of you. Your feet hurt so much but you can't stop running, not while he's not far behind. It's colder outside than you remember. Or maybe it's because you're only wearing your pajamas. You didn't have the time to worry about dressing appropriately. 

Your lungs burn from running so hard. It's been a while since you've been so active. Hope springs into your chest as you see the fence come up on the horizon. You quickly throw your bag over and climb over not being aware of the jagged rocks behind the fence. You slip and slam your leg hard against a sharp rock. 

Blood oozes out and spills over your leg like a curtain. It's a large cut, from the middle of your calf down to your ankle. You whimper in pain and sit on the ground for a moment, cursing at the world for being so unforgiving.

Panic starts to rise as you look around for signs of any ghouls nearby. Zade went out often to "clean" the area and look for supplies but you weren't so sure about that anymore. The familiar groaning and stench of rot grows near as you struggle to get up.

You quickly try to wipe the blood away with your shirt but it's too late. They wander towards you with lifeless eyes and their jaws unhinging unnaturally, ready to devour. 

Your legs move before you can think. You try to run, ignoring the burning pain in your leg and the gush of blood that comes every step you take. You have to get to the edge of the forest no matter what. You remember seeing a motorbike rental shop there when you and Zade first came to this forest. It wasn't the greatest plan but maybe you could take a bike and get away from here. 

As you run, the smell of rot doesn't seem to go away leaving you confused. You realize too late that you're being surrounded by ghouls. They had been coming from ahead and behind you. They crowd around you hungrily. A crooked and manged hand shoots out towards you. Before it can touch you, a bullet whizzes past, shooting the ghoul in the head. 

You tremble and look behind you to see the man you've been running from. "Get down!" Zade yells. You get down and cover your ears. Bullets rain down on the ghouls taking them down quickly. You shake in fear hearing the gunshots. When did this become so commonplace? You wish you could go back to life before all this mess. When things were normal and you didn't have to spend everyday on edge. 

The bullets stop and you look up slowly, still trembling in fear. Not because of the ghouls but because now Zade is here and you know he isn't happy with you. His footsteps trudge towards you and you can't help but look down again. He sighs deeply before crouching in front of you and yanking your injured leg towards him. 

You yelp in pain and surprise which he scoffs at. "So fucking stupid. You did all this just to need me to save you. Do you know how pathetic that looks?"

You look away, not able to say anything. If he notices your fear, he doesn't mention it. Or maybe, he just doesn't care anymore. His rough fingers trace the edges of your wound. "Shit... I think you might need stitches," his eyes soften and the edge in his tone lightens after seeing the look on your face. "Don't worry, I'll fix you up as soon as we get home."

He pulls out a cloth and wraps it tightly around your leg. It hurts but you try not to let it show. He notices anyways. "It needs to be tight so you don't lose too much blood."

"I-I know..."

"You're so clumsy, how could I ever let you out?" he mutters to himself. "You could've died."

"What's that?"

"...Why can't you just let me go?" you mutter bitterly. 

"Why do I have to live like this? E-everyday I'm stuck waiting for you that facility for you to come back like some sort of dog... Or even worse I have to play nice and sweet so that you don't get upset and punish me!" you begin to sob, the resentment overwhelming you. "I'd rather die, but that's not allowed either! I hate you... I hate you so much!"

A unfamiliar expression appears on his face. At first it looks like anger and then guilt. He sighs, getting up slowly. "... Let's just go home. If you want to throw a tantrum right now, do it at home where the ghouls can't get you," he says. 

There's a rustling sound to the side of you and Zade. A ghouls stands up among the pile of bodies. Zade reaches for his gun, about to shoot but stops and looks back at you with a strange expression. "Huh, I guess I left one alive..."

He steps away from you leaving you confused and scared as the ghoul creeps near you following the scent of fresh blood. 

"Z-Zade? W-what are you doing? Hurry! It's coming closer!"

"Hm? Yeah... So what?" he says blankly. He tilts his head to the side smiling. 

"Please..! I-I'm sorry, just please kill it already!"

Your mind races, thinking about what he wants to hear. There's no time to think about being shameful right now. You want to get away from Zade of course but getting mauled by a ghoul is a painful way to go. Your pleading eyes dart frantically between the ghoul and Zade. In the end you spit out whatever you could think of, "Please help me, Zade! I'm sorry for running away, I-I just—Please I-I love you!"

"Hmm, okay, but only if you say what I want you to hear. I'm feeling a bit petty. You were just so mean to me." He puts his hand over his heart with and looks at you with a deep frown while wiping his nonexistent tears. You can't believe how annoying he's being right now. You're about to be mauled by a ghoul and he's sitting there joking around. 

In a swift motion, Zade pulls out a pistol and shoots the ghoul in the mouth right before it could chomp down on you. Its blood splatters on your face. You shake and sob, feeling tired and miserable from this whole mess. Zade comes down next to you and wipes the ghoul blood off your face with his sleeve. He's smiling down on you, a warm and satisfied look in his eyes. 

"Oh, you poor thing," he says softly, "Let's get you home, yeah? Get you a nice warm bath and some rest."

He picks you up and holds you tight for a moment. His brown hair tickles against the crook of your neck. You can feel him trembling a little before kissing your cheek and making his way back home. "I love you too... more than anything."

You lift your head slightly and see that the sun is starting to rise. Trails of ghoul bodies are littered across the trail. Ignoring the bodies, the forest looks beautiful in the morning. "Am I going to be punished?" you ask Zade tearfully. 

You sniffle, your cries easing into shudders as he carries you home. You can't help but feel comforted as he holds you. He's the only one you have left after all. The people you loved and the world you knew before has withered away into nothingness. You wrap your arms around him and cry into his shoulder. He pats your head softly. 

He laughs softly, his dimples showing. "Of course you are."

[ddreamywitch]

Chapter Seven - Take Me to Church

knight!benjicot x princess!reader

Word count: 3.5k

Song: Take Me to Church - Hozier

a/n: Benji pov fans (me) RISE UPP!!

Benji's mind is spinning in circles like never before.

What has he done?

Why has he done it?

He looks at you, your cheeks an intense shade of cherry-red and he wants to throw up a little bit.

How could he do this to you? How could he have done this to you?

You are so soft and innocent, you are to be wed, you are the king's daughter. 

His uncle must be right. He is a man barely in charge of his instincts. 

"Would you stop looking at me like that," you say.

He clears his throat and steps back. "Apologies," he mumbles. Then he takes another, precautionary step back, because he feels the closeness is only making things worse. 

There is an arm's length distance between the two of you now and you are looking at him very confused. 

Maybe he should jump off the tower. 

You hum an unsure sound, a question of what to do now. 

Benji clears his throat again. "Apologies, princess, I should not have been so..."

"So un-knightly?" you offer to finish his sentence. 

He nods. Now you look a bit hurt and he wishes he could turn back time. 

Ser Benjicot of House Blackwood was certainly no stranger to a woman's touch but this is certainly new territory to him. This is a woman far above him. He had never had affiliations with somebody like this. In all honesty, he had never even spoken to a noble woman that outranked him for longer than a fleeting moment before he had met her. 

None of this would have happened if he hadn't threatened to kill the entirety of the Bracken clan during their meetings to make peace. 

A statement he still feels is justified given how those depraved heathens act. 

"Benji, would you please say anything," you plead.

"Hmm, can't." It comes out sounding as though he's swallowing his own bile, which is also what is happening. Oh god in heaven above, what had he done. 

You pick up the discarded tiara and per instinct he averts his eyes, as if his tongue hadn't just been stuck in your throat mere minutes ago. 

They were going to execute him for this. And you would be shunned.

Who even is ‘they’? Nobody knows. 

"Nobody can ever find out," he says.

You snort as you sort your ridiculous feathered monstrosity of a tiara out on your head. "I wasn't about to tell the town-crier, Benjicot, I am not slow."

No, that is right you are not. Why had you even kissed him? Or had he kissed you?

"My god, all those stories about you impaling people and yet you stand before a woman quivering."

He meets your eyes and it feels like a punch to his stomach, right where he is the most vulnerable, but he doesn't understand why he feels that way.

"I'm sorry."

You seem mad. "I will go to my chambers now. Will Ser Corrigan take the night's watch?"

Ser Corrigan? What an odd face to think about at this moment. A weathered, old man, such a harsh contrast to whom he is looking at now, with your soft edges and your softer lips and those eyes that are looking at him with much intensity. 

"I believe yes." 

You nod and lift your dress, decidedly making your way down the stairs again. 

He remains where he is, incapable of moving even as he listens to your steps get quieter. 

Why, why, why can he never ever think before he acts? 

His feet drag across the floor, heavy with the weight of his decisions as he follows you down into the heart of the castle. 

He catches up with you just as you're about to slam the door into his face. 

Per instinct his hand shoots out, just for it to be squashed. 

You gasp in horror, which is so tooth-achingly sweet that it makes his veins burn. 

Ser Corrigan is standing by the door and glances back and forth between the two of you.

"My god, Ser Benjicot," you scold and open the door a little wider. 

There's a twitch in your fingertips and he'd like to think that it's because you want to reach for him, even if it's only to see if he's injured.

Which he isn't. "It's fine, I will just bruise."

You pout, in that angry way you tend to, clearly not satisfied with his answer. 

"Step inside, I wish to have a word for you."

Ser Corriggan harrumphs. You both look at him confused. In fact you look a little bit like you are realising just now that he is also present for this exchange. 

"Princess, I am certain that the Lord of the house will soon arrive to question your early departure from dinner," he reminds you. 

Benji wishes that ugly toad would fall down a flight of stairs. The Cathcart toad. He doesn't have an issue with Corrigan. Except, perhaps, for the fact that he is here and talking when he feels the very deep-rooted need to explain himself to you. 

You sigh. "Would you please send him away when he comes? I am in no mood to be infantilized by an overgrown boy."

Ser Corrigan nods. but there is doubt etched into the lines of his face. 

Benji wants to say something to him but he has no time to, your fingers are forceful in the leather plates on his forearm. 

Tamsyn looks terrified. 

Benji is painfully aware that she is terrified of him. He misses Marion. Not that he knew her well, but she didn't look like she may hurl the moment he laid eyes on her, the way that this girl is.

"You are excused," you tell her and he's glad but yet there is an inkling of nervosity in his chest, scratching at the walls of his insides. 

You grab his hand, twist and turn it. He tries to not let it bother him. "It doesn't hurt," he says.

One thumb presses into the back of it. "Does this hurt?"

The wince is stopped in his throat but he can't hide his facial expression betrays him.

"Why in the world would you do that? The door cannot be locked anyway," you scold and drop his hand.

You cross the room, a glimmering green flurry of layers. 

He stands there, like some sort of unwanted fixture until you return from your vanity with a tiny vial and a long white piece of fabric, the function of which he cannot identify until it is ripped by your wrathful hand. 

"Is that your veil?", he asks. You don't answer.

Instead you grab his hand and leave a generous trail of your oil across his knuckles. "It's arnica, lavender and rosemary. This is supposed to be your good hand, you cannot ruin yourself so carelessly."

"You are being theatrical," he tells you and regrets it when your face goes sour like spoiled milk.

"Am I? Am I being dramatic? The only reason you are still here is your ability to kill quicker than you think." 

It hurts him where you want it to hurt him. "Why are you so enraged?"

With a poking finger you guide him to the bed. "Sit," you order. If he wasn't already on thin ice, he'd make a joke about how commandeering you can be.

It reminds him of when you had set his nose, except then you had cowered down to be at eye level with him. You don't do that now and with a lot less gentleness you wrap up his hand. 

Entirely unnecessary, but he feels he should let you or else you might actually break a finger of his. Or two. 

"You know what I meant." It becomes a question as it rolls off his tongue. 

"You didn't even say anything to be misunderstood, Lord Benjicot Blackwood." 

His name is an insult, by the way it drips with venom. 

"I must have, because why else would you be trying to strangle my wrist."

Your touch loosens in an instant. 

"Well, if you must know, I would have hoped for something more than watching you nearly throw up into the courtyard right after shoving your tongue into places where into places where it isn't supposed to be."

It is hard to not grin but social complexities aren't entirely lost on him. 

"My apologies."

"Not accepted," you mumble through gritted teeth and finish up the bandages. "Find some herbs for me and I might consider accepting."

He nods as he looks up at you, praying that you don't notice that you're still holding his hand.

Your face is stern, a look so unnatural on you, he wants to wipe it off. 

"I will find herbs," he promises and unthinkingly, maybe unknowingly, he isn't certain, his thumb swipes a circle across your knuckles.

Knuckles that have never hurt, knuckles free of scars, softer than his hands have ever been.

You wince and pull your hand out of his grasp and he thinks he's overstayed his welcome but you sit down next to him. 

"Benji."

"Witch."

You scoff. Fingertips begin twisting the rings on your fingers. 

"You know I cannot be careless about this. I cannot go forth and pretend it didn't happen."

He wraps his hand around yours again. "I know."

"Now you must tell me what your intentions are."

Benji halts and looks at you confused. You roll your eyes. 

"That is how one courts a lady," you explain further. 

"Ahh." Now he cannot hide the grin. "I cannot court you, you know this."

"You can court me in secret."

He chuckles, a low rumble in his chest. "My intentions are pure-hearted little witch."

"I highly doubt it. You are a rake. And also you are nicknamed 'Bloody Ben' which is just ridiculous if you ask me. And even further you constantly look like you've just buried a body, to the point that even Marion feared you." You throw your free hand up in exasperation. "Marion!"

His hand is beginning to hurt now that the adrenaline has ebbed down a bit. "I'm not so bad, you know. I didn't rat you out. I didn't even complain when you drooled onto my pants the other night."

Every single time he sees you flush his heart grows so far he swears his ribs are digging into it. 

Suddenly, he can't remember why he was so terrified earlier. 

"I promise I will try to not be careless. And I will attempt to look less...bloody?"

You shake your head. "I don't want you to change. You're alright as you are. I am more so concerned with your ability to handle secrecy."

"I am an excellent keeper of secrets."

"You don't wear a mask." 

He frowns at you. "What? Are we at a masquerade ball?"

"No, I mean you wear your emotions on your face. It's your greatest flaw. I don't know how this can be, I don't imagine you do this when you fight people."

Benji had never thought about this. But then again, there are many things he hadn't thought about before he met you. There's a lot of things he never thought about before today. 

There's a weird thing between the two of you now. It looms over you as you squeeze his hand and when you drop your head against his shoulder. He isn't courting you.

You are to be married. 

He's kissed you, feverishly, with all-consuming passion and he can't go back and he doesn't want to but he can't go ahead either. 

He's stuck. Once again. Though it is starting to feel less like he's stuck as your knight. 

Quite an easy duty, with a princess like this. 

There's a bang on the door and the two of you jolt apart in an instant. He misses your hair tickling his jaw instantly. 

"Your highness," Lord Cathcart sneers through the door. 

"Wanker," Benji mumbles beneath his breath. 

"What?" You yell out.

"Come out. I wish to speak with you."

You get up but Benji is faster once more, cracking open the door the tiniest bit. "The princess has retired for the night. You may speak with her on the morrow, my good Lord."

The slimy man pries his hands into the small opening. Fortunately he has no real strength compared to Benjicot, who stops the thing from moving as far as an inch. "You forget yourself, bloody Ben. This is my castle."

At this, Benji opens the door far enough to push himself through and Erik away. The fool stumbles. 

He can't say it's not amusing to him. 

"And these are the chambers of a woman. You have no right to them. Only the king does."

He pauses and does a dramatic look around the hallway. 

"And as far as I am able to tell he is not here."

Eric sputters and reddens. Not like you do, but in an angry entirely off-putting manner, that almost makes Benji want to giggle. 

"You rest assured Blackwood boy, your days as a knight are counted."

Benji shrugs. "The Brackens will surely be happy to have me as their neighbour once more."

Lord Cathcart scoffs. "You'll be lucky to get out alive." 

And as if he hadn't heard a word just spoken he heads to the door, where you are standing. 

You look a bit dishevelled and Benji is a bit proud but he can't think on it too long, as Erik towers over you with the last shred of authority he can conjure up. "You will be my wife. I offered to go about this smoothly, but you went ahead and disrespected me. You will be my wife and then you will have no choice but to obey. I shall see to that."

Benji doesn't need to say anything this time. Ser Corrigan steps between your figures and clears his throat. "The princess is not to be spoken to in such a manner. I think it best we all rest tonight and tomorrow there will be a new day to set things right."

Erik Cathcart is not one bit pleased but he realises he has not much choice and so he yields and scurries off like the little weasel that he is. 

The sight of him makes Benji want to ram his head into a wall. 

The king is a fool for sending his daughter into the arms of this man, for removing her from the castle, for running the entire kingdom into the ground like nobody in his ancestry before him had ever managed.

One could only hope that a fallen woman like Lady Cathcart is worth this much trouble. 

Hell, Benji wouldn't ever care about the societal standing of a woman but he has never let last night's fuck influence today's mood in his life.

He looks to you and then back at Ser Corrigan, who has become very hawk-eyed all the sudden. 

"I think it's for the best if I retire to my bed as well," he says and you nod in acceptance, though he can't help but notice the smidge of disappointment in your eyes. 

His feet guide him to the yard and then the stables where a young man bows to him in panic. 

He remembers that this is Bracken affiliated ground. God knows what cruel tales have been told of his fights. They all likely think him to be a man with no honour. 

Benji wants to and saddle a horse, desperate to clear his mind, when his gaze flickers out the door and falls on the church. 

He hesitates for a moment, debating his choices, when he decides that it can’t hurt to pay the confessional a visit. 

It’s a small church, not very decorated. The one at the capital has huge stained windows and your dresses tend to look quite…pretty in that lighting. That is also about the only thing he could fathom to like about being inside that place.

He’s never been religious, nowhere near as much as he likely should be. 

The thought of a god looming over his head has never made him anything but uncomfortable. 

He finds it unsettling that he might be judged by an omniscient creature. He also finds that religious people are often liars. 

And yet, there he stands, in the hallway, staring at the altar. 

He’s not even sure how confessions even work anymore. 

The priest floats into the room at the other end of it, the same one as from the dinner. He’s such an odd looking person. 

“Ah. I thought you might appear here, son,” he says, his voice echoing. 

Benji scrunches his nose a little. “Did you now, father?” He takes a few tentative steps forward. “I’d like to confess something.”

The priest nods and points towards the confessional. For a third time, he contemplates his choices but he decides that he’s no coward and takes a seat on his side of the booth. 

“In the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.”

There’s a beat of silence until Benji remembers what to do. “Amen,” he says after clearing his throat. “Bless me Father for I have sinned, it has been…I don’t remember, since my last confession.” 

Here goes. What’s there to lose? Maybe his mind, Benji thinks to himself. 

“I have corrupted somebody.”

The priest doesn’t speak. 

Benji clears his throat again. This feels violently tense. He’s not sure it should be. 

“I suppose my sin is cardinal. Sin of Lust.”

The priest’s gown makes a ruffling sound. “Ah. It is a common one.”

“This one has pretty high stakes involved, I assure you, father.” He is fairly certain that being sarcastic with a clergyman in a confessional booth is not something you’re supposed to do. But what’s it matter? He doubts a quick trip here could save his soul anyway. 

“Perhaps I should go.”

“No. Stay. Tell me what troubles you, son. Only God can help through all.”

Benji sighs and rakes a hand through his hair. “Well, I have kissed a girl. She is promised to another and I have put her virtue at risk.”

He glances over, through the barred hole in the wall and distantly makes out the side profile of the priest. “Did you force her hand?”

“No. I have killed men but I do have some dignity.”

“Well, then the girl is also guilty of a sin. But it is normal. God has made us flawed creatures. It is the way our lives go. You made the good choice, coming here. Pray the litany of Mary Magdalene three times, son.” 

He doesn’t enjoy the fact that the priest keeps calling him son. That should be reserved for one person only. He wipes his hands clean on his pants, clean of nothing in particular. He gets up to leave.

“Wait,” the priest commands. “I must warn you.”

Benji frowns. “Of what?”

The priest’s voice drops to a whisper. “There is treachery afoot in the house of Cathcart. Other houses too. I do not know the extent of it.” The priest’s gown rustles. “You must worry. You must watch yourself.” There’s a pause. “And you must write to the heir to the throne.”

Benjicot stares at him now. “What?”

“You think the Lord to be a fool and in many ways he is. But he is part of a grand scheme. I cannot tell you more.”

Benji hurries out of the booth around to the other side. “What the fuck are you blabbing about?”

“This is a house of God,” the priest reprimands at his cursing. “And I will not. I mustn’t endanger you. You need to be alive and well to serve the princess, do you not?”

“Is that a threat, old man?” 

The priest shakes his head. “I am helping you. Write to the prince. Tell him to tread carefully.” 

He points towards the entry. “This betrothal is a curse.”

He has to suppress the urge to point the dagger in his pocket against the man’s neck and get more out of him. But he remembers you and your words. He does not know how to handle the web of conspiracies that are spun around the nobility. He does not know how to solve them without laying hands and even then that would rarely diminish the problem. 

Benji steps back and considers the priest. “Well, then. Three litanies.”

With that he hurries out of the church. On the morrow he shall tell you. For now, he falls into his bed, mind continuously spinning around your kiss. When sleep comes for him, you leave with his thoughts and enter again through his dreams. 

taglist:

@dancingbaek

@jhepolie 

@knight-of-flowerss

@majoso12

@rebeccawinters 

@poppyflower-22

@nixtape-foryou

@accidentpronedork

@xlittlefiend

@vqmpyrecult

@chainsawsangel

@esposadomd

@juhdoche 

[icarusredwings]

Baby talk 2/2

Trying something new. Be kind (take 2)

A very little wade fic

Ft. Wo-wo, Mama, and 'essy

For @sirwadewilsonfromimgur because apparently people like my brain

"Logan? It's a bit late, what's wrong?" The voice asks over the phone. He wasn't sure why he called her. Why he called Jean. But he felt like she might know what to do.

"Yeah.. sorry, i-.. It's nothing.. I'll go if you're busy - I just.." he mumbles, phone in his shoulder as he begins boiling some water for the pasta.

"Logan... tell me." She says, in a way of someone who knows he won't tell her if he feels like he's bothering her.

"So, I'm... er.." He turns to see Wade laying in his pile of stuffies, watching the movie with large eyes and a curious o shaped mouth. Right now, they were at the part where she was singing in her secret cave, Wade's eyes glued to the screen in awe, as if he hadn't seen this movie 40 times already. "Babysitting... and I don't really know what to do?"

"Oh.. okay. Well how old are they?"

"Young. Really young. Barely talks." He says, trying not to sound nervous out of his mind as he preps the chicken to be cooked.

"That can be as young as 12 months. Are they potty trained?" She asks, trying to help best she could over the phone. Not like Logan would ever let them see him like this anyway.

"God I fucking hope so." Is all he can awnser with a big sigh. "I don't know, I just.. it's so much different then the kids at school."

Chuckling, he could feel that 'well no duh' look in her eyes and that smug smile. "Well, I would hope that 12 month olds are different than 12 year olds. That's 12:1, Logan." She says, and he grunts, nodding.

"Yeah, yeah, I just.. you read parenting books, right? What do they like? Babys, I mean."

Instantly Wade turns, Giving him a small glare and a pount. "MmMmh.."

"My bad, kids this little." He didn't need to understand the whines to know exactly what he was saying.

'I'm not a baby' He always said that.. man.. Wade not talking felt so weird, and it freaked him out, getting to the point he would subconsiously check to make sure he was still consious and that he COULD talk if wanted, but he didn't.

Wade was just quiet today. Al must think it's a blessing but to Logan? This was a nightmare.

"I do" She laughs again, giggling. "Why? Are they misbehaving?"

"Well... No.. but i'm afraid I might..." He mutters, blowing his cover at pretending not to be anxious about this entire thing.

"Mama?" He hears, indirectly awnsering. "No bub. Not your mama."

The woman giggles again from the side conversation. "I'm sure you'll be fine. Do you want me to-"

"NO!!" He screams, watching as Al got spooked, drawing her pistol on Wade, and for once, she had a good shot. "Get off of me!!"

"Well, jeez Logan, you could have just -"

"Sorry! I have to go!!"

Beep.

"Logan??.. He hung up on me." Jean says, miles away. Logan just knows it.

"Althea! It's Wade!! It's just Wade!!" He shouts, quickly coming over to take the gun from her. "He's just.. really little right now. God damn kid, are you tryna die!?" He yells at him, seeing him only try to curl up more into the woman, tearing up.

"Althea, why don't you go sleep in the room, okay?"

The older woman grumbles, shifting. "Baby you can't lay on me like that. You're too big." She says, much calmer now as Logan pulled Wade off of her and set him back on the floor.

"You're too big for that, kid, you're gonna hurt her!" He tells him, only making Wade feel worse.

"..mama?"

"No! No mama. She dosn't feel good and-"

"Logan. Enough. I can take care of myself." She mutters, groaning as she got up.

".. Mama?" Wade says again, his mind very one tracked at the moment. He knew three things. That he wanted held. He liked Mama. And he didn't know why he was so upset with him. Did he hurt her? Was she okay? Wade wished he could ask, but no words seemed to come out when he tried.

"Hi, Honey, Mama's gonna go take a nap. Behave. Both of you." The old woman mumbles, cupping his face and giving him a kiss on the head, stumbling towards the room. "Wake me up when dinner's ready."

"Yes ma'am.." Logan mutters, glancing down at Wade, watching as he wiped his tears, pulling Fluffy and his legs into his chest, sniffling.

Swallowing, he wasn't even sure if he would understand if he apologized, but he needed to anyway. "Hey.. I'm sorry for yelling at you.. I thought... I thought that.." He rubs his hand into his face with an embaressed grumble. "..Honestly, I don't know what I was thinking. You can't even.. well, no, that's not right. It still would hurt, and I guess I just didn't want Mama to hurt you and- "

Wade wasn't even looking at him. He was staring at the Tv, curled up, and didn't seem to be litsening.

Sighing heavily, he looked at the gun in his hand, deciding he should put it up. It wasn't something he should have down with Althea not feeling the greatest and Wade not even being able to put together sentences.

Walking away, he puts it in the closet, making sure to lock it like it was supposed to. God, there were so many weapons in here. It wouldn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that these guns weren't just for hunting or a hobby. No one had this much ammo when owning a gun collection that was "just for show."

Making his way to the kitchen, he stirred the boiling noodles, dumping them in the colander.

"Wo-wo?... wo-wo!"

"Woah woah?" He asks himself, looking up to see Wade pointing at the tv. Prince Eric had picked up Ariel and was now twirling her while smiling.

"Wo- wo?"

Tilting his head, he thought that perhaps this was cool to Wade. "Yeah, Wow buddy. That's amazing." He says but Wade gave him a dirty look. One that usually was his 'Bitch? Thats not what I said' squish of his non existing brows.

"Wo-wo. Ups?"

"Ups?"

"Wo-wo, Ups?" He grins, putting his hands up as he did the grabby motions again.

Oh. That made more sense. "You want me to do that to you?"

Wade nods, crawling about two feet before doing the hands again.

"Mmh... okay, but just once. And then I have to cook. Deal?"

Putting the butter in the pan, he came to pick him up, raising him up. The small squeal and the wide, sparkly eyes said all that Logan needed to know. When put back down, Wade claps.

"Yaay!"

Logan couldn't help but smirk. Really? That's all he wanted? "Heh.. yeah.. Yay." Was it that simple? This.. easy??

Vanessa made it sound so much more complicated when she talked about it. But then again.. I guess Vanessa wasn't as strong as him either, so it must have been difficult for her to hold him. The idea of her holding a 6'2 man on her hip made him snort.

She was strong, obviously, most dancers had to be, but dancers were lean and nimble as well. Logan was much more on the heavier side, so it was far easier for him.

"More?"

"More ups?" He asks, despite seeing his hands reach up. It wasn't the fact that he didn't know. Rather, he wanted confirmation.

"Wo-wo, Ups!" He smiles, excited and happy to be given the attention.

"Ok, ok, but last time, alright?" With another nod, Logan picks him up again. This time, Wade wraps his arms around him tight, nuzzling him again.

Sighing, Logan rubs his back, letting his chin go to the top of his head. "I can't hold you forever, you know... I have stuff to do.." he mumbles, bouncing just a bit in his knees, keeping his arm under his bottom so he didn't drop him.

"You're a good kid, Wade but I really do have to cook."

The whine that comes out of Wade is desperate for attention, lonely even. As if he just told Wade he was leaving and never coming back ever again.

"I come."

"No, sweetheart.. you'll get burned." The bouncing stops as he tries to set Wade down but he holds onto him like a kitten whos afraid of being dropped too far.

"Come on, let go. You'll be okay in here. See look. She's using a fork as a comb. Isn't that funny?" Logan says, trying to distract him enough to stay put. Vanessa wasn't kidding about the wanting held part. He was quite literally clinging to him like his life depended on it.

"Alright, get off. Here- do you want this? Take it." Putting him down, he took his hoodie off with him, letting him hold it as he stood. "There. Now stay. Im trying to make you some noodles, bub."

Finally getting to walk away, the look on his face hurt his chest.. just a bit anyway. The way he watched him go with such sad eyes and clutching the hoodie close to him. As if he was abandoning him.

Eh. He'd be fine. He could still see him in the kitchen so there wasn't really any reason to worry.

In said small kitchen, Logan put together the sauce, butter, and some seasonings, starting to stir it when he glanced towards the tv, doing a double take because Wade was missing.

"Wade?" He says, only to be met with him tugging on his jeans. The sight was something he wasn't prepared for, Wade put his hoodie on, and it was too big for him by at least two sizes. "Wo-wo!"

"Woah woah huh... wait, is that me?" He asks, tilting his head. "It's an L, bud. L" he made the L noise for him. "Lo-Lo."

"Wo-wo."

His eyes roll. "What ever. Come on, kid get out of the kitchen. You're gonna burn yourself."

This lasted about 2 seconds before Wade came back in. "Ups?"

At this point, dinner was practically done. Now, just have to finish it up and serve. "Fine... but don't touch anything."

"Yaaay!!" He claps, reaching up only to get scooped up and put on his hip, holding him with one arm, the other stiring.

"Yeah... yay.. fuckin' brat.." Wade was always getting what he wanted.

Wade giggles, holding his neck and once again snuggling up to him.

"Yeah, yeah, that's enough. Just be good. Don't touch. Ouches."

"Ow?"

"Yup. Ow."

So now, here was Logan, an almost 400 pound man holding 150 pound 6'2 guy on his hip, stiring and plating dinner. With his head on his shoulder, Wade calmed down immensely from being carried, just watching what Logan was doing and silent.

Dipping his finger into the sauce, Logan held it up. "Do you like this?"

Taking the finger in his mouth, Wade immediately made a 'mmmh' noise, nodding.

"Good. Do you want it on the side or on top of your noodles?"

" 'op."

" 'kay." Putting the sauce on top, he began to make Als.

" 'essy?"

"Huh?" He asks, not sure.

" 'essy??" Wade points to the plate.

"No. Mama's."

"Mama?"

"Mhm. Wo- wo's." Logan points to his own.

"Ooooh! Yummies."

"Yup.. Yummies..." he says, only to become embarrassed, face heating up as he grunts. Man... damn this baby talk..

____

A little later, after dinner, Wade came out of the room, looking almost ashamed, wearing Logan's x-men athletics department hoodie, the back saying 'HOWLETT' in big letters.

He was playing with his hands as he came to him. "Hey.."

Glancing away from the Tv, Logan was a bit confused, Not now sure if he was still small or not. "Hey?"

"I-.. im sorry.. for.. ealier. I know you don't like that stuff. I don't really.. know.." It seemed the farther he got into the apology, the tighter his voice got, his eyes becoming glossy.

"Hey-hey, stop. Why are you crying? You don't have anything to be sorry about. You're alright. Everything's okay, Wade. Sit." He says, patting next to him, but he just shook his head, rubbing his arm.

"No. I-it's not okay. You didn't ask for that. And you don't like t-taking care of me like that-" he wipes his eyes with the sleeves, clearly feeling bad about being so small infront of him.

"What? No, hold on. I never said that. I'll always take care of you." He says, a little frustrated that he would think differently.

"B-but you-"

"Shut the fuck up and come here."

Swallowing, He hesitantly sat on his lap, letting Logan pull him close and kiss the tears from his eyes. "Don't you ever say that shit again, you hear me? If I didn't want to take care of you, I would have left a long time ago. It was just.. odd at first. Because I've never seen it before. That's all. Just because something is new doesn't mean it's bad. You taught me that, idiot."

Sniffling, he shifts to nuzzle up under his chin again, curling up to be as small as possible, letting the man hold him in his arms. "I-i don't.." he heaves.

Logan is patiant, holding his cheek and rubbing his breath. "Shh.."

"I-i don't even know why I did that. I just.. it just happened." He whispers.

"That's alright. You don't have to know everything... a little heads up would be nice though." He mutters, pulling him up more to rub his cheek on him the way he liked.

Sniffling again, he smiles softly. "I'll try.. worst case senerio I just ask you to pick me up."

"Tell ya what. You ask me to pick you up and I will. Just... not during missions. I don't wanna have to slice a fucker in half because he shot you when you're small."

Wade giggles, his heart rate finally settling down as he listened to Logan's. "No promises.." letting out a big sigh, he let his body relax, taking a few deep breaths, nestling into him, the smell of the hoodie making him tired. "..I love you.. a-And thanks for not letting Al shoot me.."

Logan's eyes widened. He did hear his apology. A soft half lidded smile came to his face, glad that it wasn't for nothing. "I love you too.... cry baby."

"Can you guys shut up? Wheel of fortunes on." Al says, feeling much better that she too has had a nap and a good meal.

Sigh... that was their Althea.. keeping them humble.

The little giggle that came from him and the rythemed breathing following told Logan that he would be stuck in this spot for quite a while. Oh well... He was always up for a good nap.

"...Morons." The old woman says with a hint of fondness in her voice, hearing not one but two sets of snores. It was music to her ears.

[quitealotofsodapop]

"Uh, Monkey King?" MK asked, ducking as a rather expensive pensive looking cloth flew ive this head, "What are you doing?"

"Packing." Sun Wukong grunted, eyeing what appeared to be a ceremonial robe of sorts with a critical eye. MK felt apprehension build in him, remembering what happened the last time he found his master packing.

"Are you... going somewhere?" MK swallowed his anxiety, hoping beyond all hope the answer was no. The gods, however, did not grant his wish.

"Yeah." Wukong sighed, running his hand through his fur, "I got some business that requires me to be gone for about a week. I'll try to keep you updated."

"A week!?" MK parrots back in horror, "But what about my training!?"

Wukong paused, tail flicking, before turning back to MK as if shocked he'd even ask that.

"MK, after everything that happened, do you really think a short break in training would be that big of an impact!?" Wukong asked, legitimately confused by MK's worry, "'Sides, you knot definitely are far enough in your training some self-guided study would be a benefit. If you want i can give you some tasks to do while I'm gone, too."

"But where are you going!?" MK asked, "And don't lie about going on vacation like you did with the whole Lady Bone Demon thing! Wait... is this like the lady Bone Demon? Are you having me behind again!?"

"Uh, no." Wukong grunted, pushing MK out of his face. "I just have some kingly duties to fulfill that require me to take a trip. I'm not going to be gone more than a week, maybe two at most. And Macaque is keeping an eye on the island so if anything happens, he can send a message to me."

MK froze at that, confusion written in his face. He tilted his head as he looked at the other monkey,

"Kingly duties? I thought being the Monkey King meant fighting bad guys and taking naps whenever you want!"

"No." Wukong chuckles, choosing to be amused by his apprentice' backwards comment than offended, "Being the Monkey Kid means fighting bad guys and saving the world. Being the Monkey King is a biiiit more complicated than that."

"...Say what now?"

"Alright, let's just say... I've been kinda keeping a lot of what goes into being my successor a secret." Wukong's paw came up to rub the back of his neck, "With so many major threats popping up all over the place, I'd focused entirely on your training as a warrior, but there's a side I haven't even began to touch. I wanted to make sure you were the best warrior you could be before either tried to add the ksot political and administrative side of being my heir into the fold."

"Politics!?" MK spat out incredulously, staring straight his mentor in disbelief.

"I am the Monkey King, MK. That means I have a whole kingdom to run." Wukong continued, "Any and all of the free time i get is dedicated to training you on top of that! The Counsel of the Great Demon Kings happens every hundred years or so. I hadn't gone to the last four, but since I've made a public reappearance, and with an apprentice at that, I'm expected to go and can't wiggle out of it this time! Believe me, I've tried."

"So like... Are you just up and leaving without me?" MK now looked heartbroken, putting all the puppy dog eyes on full blast, "You promised not to leave me again though!"

Wukong groaned, catching on to what MK was trying to do.

"Kid... you don't want to come with me. It's not going to be fun or exciting at all. You'll be forced to wear uncomfortable ceremonial robes that weigh a ton and have to be quiet and well-behaved." Wukong explained, trying to dissuade MK from his train of thought, "And everyone there is mean! They are dying to sniff out a scandal or two to take advantage of!"

"So? You said yourself you neglected to teach me how to handle politics. This is the perfect opportunity to start!" MK grinned, "I'm sure Tang can lend me one of his robes too."

"First of all, you will NEVER go to one of these events with a stuffy old scholar's robe. I'd lend you one of mine if that EVER happened." Wukong pointed out, eye twitching, "Second, NO! This is a final test sort of deal, NOT a tutorial type of thing!"

hehe! We discussed in the dms about poor Wukong having to attend a political summit for demon kings, and MK getting "homework" for the week.

Pigsy is approving of the homework idea. He's raised MK long enough to know his son needs goals to fulfil or he starts getting into trouble.

[maxdibert]

I know this might be more aggressive than I usually do, but I'm honestly tired. I can't help but believe that the marauders fandom lives in a completely different reality than mine.

They love to force how good James Potter was, but this same James exposed Severus' intimacy. “He had no intention”, if a person takes the life of another without intention, does that change that a person died? It doesn't change. But they love to say that because there is no intention, there is no guilt, when that's not how it works. Besides all the repetition of how Severus was an incel and James was the one who sincerely loved Lily. The epitome of agape, they say, when in reality, he was just a spoiled little rich boy who can't hear "no" from a girl and get on with his life and instead he... *checks notes* threatened and blackmailed their supposed “love” in addition to chasing his best friend with his gang of idiots and, at the same time, leading the other to hell, even though said boy heard the girl’s “no” and disappeared from her life as she asked.

They act as if Severus being a spy was no big deal and it was his obligation to do something to defeat Voldemort, when it wasn't, he had already done enough by going out of their way to give a warning about the Potters' safety. Aside from the stilted speech that "he did it for the girl", when, amazingly, said girl, at this point, is already dead, he would have gained nothing by doing what he did for the wizarding world. It seems like a competition about who objectifies Lily the most in Severus' life, when Severus: never said anything negative about her, never assumed anything about her sex life or even said that she deserved to die for not choosing him, on the contrary , he blamed himself and wished for his own death. "But, look, he bullied the son of the woman he said he loved, that's definitely obsession," his character flaws in relation to Harry were never about Lily but about old memories of his bully. His problem was always unique and exclusive to James Potter. Every time he insults Harry it's always "you're like your father", but never once did he say anything even remotely negative about Lily or blame her for cutting off her friendship with him. But still, the fandom loves to spew nonsense about how he "wanted to get into the girl's pants and got angry when he couldn't."

I vented, sorry.

That’s why I genuinely think most Snaters are just kids—they see everything in black and white and don’t understand that life doesn’t work that way. Severus didn’t owe anyone anything. The fact that he felt bad about Lily wasn’t an obligation; he could have not cared and it still would’ve been fine. Lily cut ties with him. Lily married his bully. It would’ve been completely justified for him to see her as a piece of trash after she ended up with James. Honestly, I would’ve seen her as trash. If a former friend of mine pulled something like that—ending up with someone who had physically and psychologically tormented me for years, knowing full well what I went through—they’d be lucky if I didn’t burn their house down for being such a piece of work.

But Severus's relationship with Lily carried an enormous emotional weight because she had been his attachment figure for many years. So it makes sense that he ended up feeling so guilty, especially since he was the one who told Voldemort the prophecy. But again, even the prophecy wasn’t something he shared with malicious intent. Severus was doing his job as an agent in a war (even if he was on the "wrong" side), and it just so happened that his work unintentionally affected someone he cared about. Of course, he felt guilty afterward—it’s completely understandable. Anyone in his position, with his life experiences, would.

If I were in his place, though? I would’ve ignored Lily completely. Let her and her bully of a husband die, honestly, LOL.

One thing I find fascinating about Severus is how much things actually matter to him. He cares about repaying his debt to society. He cares about redeeming himself for what happened to Lily. He cares about doing the right thing to atone for his mistakes. And he doesn’t have to care, because all the people he sacrifices himself for are people who treated him like garbage at some point.

He didn’t have to be loyal to Dumbledore, especially after Dumbledore forced him to stay silent when he was almost killed as a teenager, made him keep that secret, and left him out in the cold. He didn’t have to be loyal to Lily either. No matter how their friendship ended, I think it’s indefensible (and I’m sure others would agree) for her to get involved with a spoiled rich kid whose whole reputation was built on tormenting others. He didn’t have to risk his life for the Order when most of its members openly despised him his entire life.

He didn’t have to do any of it. And honestly? It would’ve been justifiable for him not to, given his context and his past. But he did. He did all of it because he wanted to be a better person.

Sure, his personality doesn’t always reflect that, but let’s be real—that’s the personality of someone who never stops suffering. His reactions aren’t strange—they’re the normal reactions of someone with unresolved trauma who’s reached adulthood without the chance to fully develop emotional or social maturity because of that same trauma.

And of course, he didn’t need to beg for James’s life. If I were Severus, I wouldn’t have asked Voldemort to spare James. I’d have asked him to inflict the worst possible torture on James before finishing him off. But then again, I’m Spanish, and we Mediterraneans have hot tempers and always choose violence, LOL.

But seriously, I’m so fed up with the endless whining about why Severus did this or that. It doesn’t matter why. The fact is, he did it. The important thing is that his actions contributed to a cause, and thanks to him, the world was saved. Everything else is irrelevant because, let’s be honest, many of us would’ve walked away from saving a society that judged, mistreated, and condemned us without a second thought.