#things could be worse for me but all things considered theyre very ok right now. i hope they can be very okay for everyone someday

[bidoofdaily]

i drew this on the clock so basically i got paid to do it

[aspd-culture]

hey, so i recently did some research and took the mmpi and a few other tests that i knew were well regarded as diagnostic tools by professionals, as well as self reflection and matching myself with criteria. (all tests found free probably illegally online via links on reddit cause i dont got that kind of money) and it appears that i have aspd.

I consider myself a good person, i try to always be good to everyone which is a lot of effort because it’s something i dont do naturally, and imo that makes me better than a “normal person” but i digress

finding this out, while relieving in the way that it explained a lot of stuff, has also made me feel more alienated. i cant tell anyone im close to because theyll just hear “sociopath” and think i dont care about them or ive been manipulating them this whole and leave, and i wont be able to find new people because im bad at connecting with others so ill be alone. and no one online with aspd seems to have my experiences (also a lot of the online spaces are filled with pwBPD and pwNPD using our tag lmao and i dont relate to them either obviously) so i feel alien here too.

I dunno, finding this out was helpful in some ways but in others i just feel worse.

I guess it’s a net good now that i know that my way of thinking and going through life doesnt make me a bad or manipulative person its just how i naturally think bc of my disorder, and as long as im choosing to be good to people it shouldn’t matter. i just wish it wasnt so stigmatized to have, and i wish people would realize that i am capable of being a good person just as much as they are, i just have my own way of doing it.

I actually dont get why having it Come Naturally is such a good thing anyway, isnt it more meaningful if someone isnt “good by nature” but actively chooses to be anyway? I think it means less and is less reliable if someone is good by nature because then it means that they don’t actually know how or why theyre doing it, and if they have a moment of fluctuations in their empathy then they could be worse than any of us disordered folk who had to learn they why and how of this stuff.

lmfao ok uh sorry for having a character arc in your ask box you can delete if you want idc

No, no worries! I'm sorry it took me this long to get to honestly because yeah I agree with this - it is in my opinion objectively better to do good things by choice, even when it's hard for us. And, in fact, the NTs feel that way too but they don't like that it applies to us.

It's a whole cliche people like to throw around, that it isn't easy to be a good person and that the only truly good people are the ones that doing it when it's hard too - that the easiest thing isn't always the right thing, all of that. They just don't like that those things apply to us too and therefore we are very much their definition of good people.

The world has so much stigma against us, and I'm sorry you're struggling with it, that any and all of you are. We shouldn't be treated this way as a result of us being mistreated as kids. It's not our fault, but we're labeled and demonized anyway. And it sucks, and even though it says everything about them and nothing about us, people believe them bc they're so used to thinking we're the scary ones so we must be wrong.

That seems to be slowly changing, and I hope I (and you) are around to see when it does.

Plain text below the cut:

No, no worries! I'm sorry it took me this long to get to honestly because yeah I agree with this - it is in my opinion objectively better to do good things by choice, even when it's hard for us. And, in fact, the NTs feel that way too but they don't like that it applies to us.

It's a whole cliche people like to throw around, that it isn't easy to be a good person and that the only truly good people are the ones that doing it when it's hard too - that the easiest thing isn't always the right thing, all of that. They just don't like that those things apply to us too and therefore we are very much their definition of good people.

The world has so much stigma against us, and I'm sorry you're struggling with it, that any and all of you are. We shouldn't be treated this way as a result of us being mistreated as kids. It's not our fault, but we're labeled and demonized anyway. And it sucks, and even though it says everything about them and nothing about us, people believe them bc they're so used to thinking we're the scary ones so we must be wrong.

That seems to be slowly changing, and I hope I (and you) are around to see when it does.

[fappellmoan]

ok and now i need to talk this out on here cause like in all reality idc that much but this is just a little. awk. i might do this under the cut just so i can talk in a bunch of little paragraphs if thats chill ok ty

sooooo right ive mentioned that sam has been talking abt having beef specifically w his roommates but also that friend group at large bc they went on spring break trips w/o him. The roommate took a duo trip with fellow dyke and everyone else did like a big thing together erm

right thats just the context idrc except for the amount of times sams vaguely alluded to it and idk any other details. um but he has called his roommates like the 'poison pills' of the whole ordeal since they literally live together (but they havent been that close. prob since their freshman year when sam was out for a semester. which isnt inherently er bad but hes acting like hes been victimized for the last few years)

and like last night after this long sesh of working on our assignment sam and i r walking to the bus stop and he says something about finding out just like shitty awful drama and how it sucks having to live with 'two of those people' lmao sorry im not laughing im just like. whatever

this said i have plans to see. should i name sams roommate. ok i cant do that rn but we have plans to hang on monday and i would be seeing sam like immediately after for class. and esp if we're hanging out on campus like we might have a repeat of last time where sam spots us out and im not sure if he'd approach and hang this time. but hes obviously aware that me and them like chat

so it's like not so subtle that hes trying to get me to either ask abt the roommate or flat out not trust/see them anymore and i just havent engaged which might come across as "fake" but like. well ill be honest man theyre all a year younger than me and that doesnt mean much but it does feel very immature to handle things this way idk the whole story but im not gonna get roped into the like Omg i cant talk to this person bc of beef idk about...

and maybe i should feel worse abt not being #loyal to someone who is or at least at one point was considered a friend esp when it comes to someone that yeah ig he does know better than i but i dont... sorry ive been talking abt this bitch like cady and regina george except im not psychosexually obsessed im just like. hes been more insufferable than i remember lately yk.

i feel the Tiniest bit bad and like oh have i taken advantage of u bc yk we've hung and smoked and had dinner together often at ur place and def wormed my way into talking to the roommate via u etc but then i remember the way sam talks abt like anything and i dont feel all that bad

and theres this whole thing abt the eclipse i dont have plans to go see it it might happen last second but now after sams asked me abt it and messaged me like yeah idk we (him and his bestie) could maybe take a bus but we'd need a place to stay (asking to stay w my family bc i mentioned it like once on my close friends) and then theyre like going to a diff city anyway like oh my gooooood it's gonna be seen as shady and i dont really CARE i just need assurance that this is stupid as hell and its ok if im a little bit of an asshole about it. i dont think being mad abt the eclipse would hold up but w/e

has not been at the top of my worries and still isnt but now that this is all coming up in the next week im like frank g*llagher voice (sorry) oh Jesus Christ. you know

[mandy4ever69420]

4.11

ian looks like hes about to cry watching mickey make nice at the christening afterparty. much to consider abt ian's trauma in life circling around role as a witness. i also include the fact that fiona had that breakdown in sheila's house at monica in s1 as part of this watching someone just fall the fuck apart like that and feeling responsible is awful

'ian + mickeys freedom' is a photo/gifset that needs to exist. i need to see it. i dont want you to go back to juvie / youre not free / it was hard looking at you through that glass / etc

thinking today about that person who thought that mickey was deliberately being alluded to in seasons 6 7 8 because they didnt know his departure was supposed to be permanent. wrt ians vigor when he gets to hit mickey's dad. the opportunity to live out a scenario where he gets to physically defend someone from their homophobic parent

i cannot even believe i saw people calling mickey misogynistic for how he talked to svetlana in season 4 like i was already like 'ok but we realize why that was like that right.' but i figured maybe i was being overly forgiving or it was worse than i remembered. no dude it was very obviously tit for tat homophobic / abuse related harassment to every insult he relays her way. its literally the mindset about women ontologically being victims in any scenario. come on now.

this is more or less baseless but i always assumed that when svetlana said she was very close with terry she meant she was often sort of lying on mickey's behalf. both because it strengthens her leverage and because it does protect him in the way she needs to have a second set of hands around and to have a reason to be living in the house she lives in. Also i enjoy how this unintentionally is the first time we hear about how terry is as rachel said just like funny and charming and charismatic when he's not being a nightmare. everybody is a person even when theyre a terrible person and svetlana is very skilled at dragging even half of a good time out of something horrible. because of those damn circumstances she will be in

horrrible sad debbie matt conversation but when she asks why he ever dated seema and he says 'she seemed nice' and debbie says 'well she wasnt' . Ha. it's like how matt 'seems nice' rn but i know damn well he isnt

i love the way frank talked to emily when he thought she was fiona. It's so heartbreaking. and the solace he was able to unintentionally offer this little girl and how you get this glimpse of the ideal person he wants to be even if he can't articulate it.

it's funny to me how many people are blinded by liking sheila. she's not even just like someone 'nice' who does bad things she's straight up kind of a nightmare to be around. wym you are mad at sammi for wanting to be in her dads hospital room

oh also. vindication today re mickey just not liking people and not liking to be treated too gently for too long or he gets uncomfortable. i mean we knew this. but he literally explains it in the plainest of terms. Also it was funny to watch kevin try to suck up and mickey was like Die. kevin's so lucky that all that other shit went down so he was no longer on mickey's hitlist and could be slightly homophobic in a non dangerous way and mickey would feel relief instead

[spacedhead]

homestuck reread #13 act 6 p4

still in these conversations where the kids reveal their true feelings about each other except not TO each other but to someone else. this dirk one is so true though roxy has been the goat of their session and the one fucking thing holding them all together. god i love roxy

wow so cool they all ascended at the same time! surely nothing bad will happen immediately after

theyre finally arriving. holy shit . theyre COMING THROUGH THE WINDOW. JOHN AND JADE

yeah ok so jade showed up and her and jane immediately got turned evil

DAVE AND KARKAT HIIII

this is a CLASSIC dave/karkat mess around. if you know, you KNOW . shit had me ROFLing.

holy davesprite . i havent seen this mf since like RIGHT AFTER cascade. literally its been eons

TRUEE i think its a strider lalonde thing they looove to go on and on about random bullshit

hey its these bozos what up yall

waitt theyre being friendly to each other? breath players CAN get along!!! this is huge news. especially for me.

this actually would be a hard ass shirt fr i need that shit

this is the reaction i get when i bring up minestuck to my friends... and im like guys please its actually fun i promise... .(im lying)

yo its the fan trolls what uppppp

okay nice meeting you

this is all very silly :D

OH GOD WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU. WHY DO YOUHAVE EYES.... WHAT THE FUCK I DONT LIKE IT I DONT LIKE IT I ACTUALLY HATE IT GET IT OFF GET IT OFF

YES!!!!!!!! OKAYYYY TAVROS!!! stand up for yourself girl you are serving like crazy right now. i think maybe this is more meaningful than when he tried to kill her, cause that was just a too little too late type of thing where he wouldnt have actually accomplished anything by succeeding, and also had no chance of doing so. BUT realizing his CONFIDENCE and his FREEDOM actually is meaningful and it will accomplish things later on!!! :D YAY TAVROS

insane behavior

i think i agree with john here, i dont think it is out of line for him to hesitate in giving you the life ring. you dont have to be a good person to be a hero. but you do have to do... heroic things? like, ever? maybe once in your fucking life? when is the last time ANYTHING you did could be considered "heroic?" when you were alive, all you did was make everyone around you suffer. they had to kill you just to make sure you didnt doom them all. when youre dead, sure youre hunting down a weapon to kill the big bad monster, but you dont even seem to care about the millions of troll lives you are mind controlling against their will to be bait for your big mission. who the hell are you trying to save? the heroes that are alive in this story literally NEVER encounter the version of the villain that you are trying to stop. whats more, this big plan to use the your ghost army FAILS because the one who was doing basically ALL the legwork mind controlling most of the ghosts ditches you, and the only reason you still have an army by the end is because the guy you fucking bullied the whole time when you were alive (and a lot of the time you were dead) BAILS you out by ACTUALLY being a hero and a genuinely good person that doesnt need to MIND CONTROL PEOPLE to get them to follow him. look. i understand everything you are saying. about not having time to deal with the morals and ethics of what you are trying to accomplish. because the ends justify the means. but the thing is that NONE of it matters. YOUR PLAN FAILS. YOU GIVE UP and have an actual SATISFYING character arc. then it gets retconned and the main version of you goes back to being Worse. and then her plan...? succeeds? i guess? if succeeding means literally EVERY ghost in the army gets obliterated, the secret weapon deploying the four beta kids who are almost all killed by LE, and randomly davepeta being the one to throw him as well as themself into a blackhole. i guess if that counts as success, then congrats. you didnt even get to see that happen though, because you got ejected from the fight frame one. HOPE IT WAS WORTH IT!

anyway... what was i doing. oh yeah look at this. this is a bit sad

okay this is pretty real. even if it is nonsensical, and maybe a little bit problematic?

me talking about myself three images ago

i like this panel. poor john cannot find his friends

this is a very cool panel as well

FAWK

YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO worlds most epic meetup

my worst nightmare

fucking scary ass motherfucker please get a grip. also brown contacts .

GOD. ROXY IS SO FUCKING REAL AND TRUE. THEYRE ACTUALLY MY GOAT ITS SO FUCKING INSANE HOW MUCH I LOVE ROXY

well. things are pretty bad right now! jade is evil jane is evil everyone is on random planets with no memory of how they got there john is missing. if i didnt know any better this might seem like the beginning of something really bad . but what do i know. anyway catch you on the next one. or catch me? joff i will see you next time. ok joff bye joff

[gaysonlyocean]

What are the villains so far in it? What're your takes on the classic villains of Spider-Man?

apologies for the delay i went apeshit over recieving a ask at last jhgfghj

im still working out whos in it and whos left on the cutting room floor cause kjhgfgh theres so many different villains yknow but i currently have seven villains, and all but two of them are solid and have actual stuff i can share

those 7 are doctor octopus, kraven the hunter, venom, green goblin, norman osborn whos separate to gobby in this cause i saw that idea and was inspired, the rhino and sandman

gonna put my details on them under the cut cause i have Things To Say

ok so doc ock in this universe is as per usual otto octavius and hes a man in his late 40s who wears hawaiian shirts all the time

i love raimiverse so rosie is here too and married to him and shes trying her best

so his backstory is he made the arms to make a safer and more direct form of manipulating control rods in nuclear reactors, but he didnt believe 1. it would fail or 2. anyone but him would be up for doing the test run, instead he opted for a "if you want something done right do it yourself" approach

and taking a moment to say the plant he picked out for the demostration is where pearl foggers, our spiderperson here, dad and stepmum work

thats a surprise tool that will help no one later

so the demostration happens and everything seems to work as planned but during the whole immediate celebration the power started rising uncontrollably and caused a explosion, of the people in the room with him otto was the only survivor due to the fact he wasnt able to move from where he was standing and had the arms to shield him

he ends up really fucked up from this cause of both shrapnel and burns but also radiation exposure cause while the rest of the plant were able to shut down the reactor so there was only about a minute or so of it being open thats still a lot of radiation and also of course the bog standard getting fused to the arms

and furthermore it takes a good few hours for rescuers to get to him so he was just stuck pinned down and surrounded by dead bodies for a bit which isnt very good for your mental health yknow

anyway he finally gets rescued and then has to spend three months in a isolation ward to recover which is incredibly painful considering the amount of damage and is made worse cause everything he was wearing that could be removed had to be destroyed including his wedding ring

only to find once hes given the clear that he can go home that hes being painted as villain for the accident even through he tried everything he could to stop the power rise and has no idea what caused it

and his reaction to this is "if theyre going to call me a villain, a villain i shall be"

moving on to kraven who is in the art ive posted, we have miss evpratsiya olesya kravinoff, whos built like rhea ripley

shes this 6'7 woman who is just as insane as any other kraven out there and its great, like she will start mauling you and also due to the fact ill have to remake her ref she is going around tits out while doing all of this too

she hasnt even got like a fuckign kjhgfghj reason to be this way shes just insane and went to serbia to get mutated to be even more insane and THEN she shows up in the plot she didnt have to do that she just did

and then THEN she arrives in new york and sees spider-fire and is just "that is a child" and openly says "hey im not going to fight a child leave now or else"

and pearl, being 1. a spiderperson and 2. a 13 year old says no!! im goign to stop you from doing crime!! and evpratsiya just shrugs and starts throwing blades at spider-fire WHO SHE INSTANTLY CLOCKS AS BEING A 13 YEAR OLD MAAM CALM DOWN

and like,,, she also stalks pearl for a bit to find out the perfect time to strike and the one redeeming part of this behaviour is she refuses to go after flick if flickers not doing spidey stuff cause thats not honourable while actively stalking this CHILD

she wont stop being this way, shes jsut insane and running around with her titties just out to try to violently kill a child

oh also shes engaged to calypso, we stan a insane lesbian

that whole,,, thing aside we are moving onto venom!! instead of a human disaster we have another 13 year old!!

so pearls best friend is this kid called daisy peachley and theyve both been friends for years bonding over being nonbinary and not neurotypical cause pearls autistic and daisy has adhd

but the problem is daisy has a MASSIVE crush on pearl but pearl doesnt feel the same way cause ones aroace but hasnt jhgfgh had that realisation yet

and cause theyre close daisy knows pearl hasnt ever had a crush on anyone and rationalises how pens feelings wont be returned so instead shes just agonising over it and pining aggressively

some infomation about daisy is pen is fostered but isnt exactly in the best situation aka the apartment is full of other foster kids who are all being basically neglected so daisy spends pens time out of the house

this all leads to one day at like 4am daisys out and about as per usual but instead of just messing around shes having a bad time and is doign some arson cause as kids pen and pearl used to spend a lot of time in this lil tiny shack they made for funsies and daisy has been maintaining it ever since while pining over the feelings and pens had enough and burns it to the ground

as this is happening pen sees something fall from the sky and as a 13 year old who is going through it she decides to check it out

and if youve seen the blob then we have the scene were dan the can man picks up the blob with a stick and it falls onto his hand but its daisy seeing the symbiote

obviously this is very scary to a child but whats more scary? the sound of people approaching!! so daisy makes a break for it

and then doesnt show up to school for a week to get used to this situation

now kjhgfghj the problem comes with a angry traumatised 13 year old being combined with venom so pens foster parents get cronched and then the two of them are just doing the worst way to cope with all these feelings by taking it out on everyone

in lighter news we have my green goblin!!! its fucking terrifying

so pov: you are norman osborn, you make the serum and your trying to find out the uses for it all, you sign papers allowing all kinds of experimentation not really caring for what your funding

and you get more than you bargained for

gobby here is a 9 foot tall embodiment of destruction and chaos and that knows who is responsible for its being here

it was "born" in january of 2017, and it escaped in october and oh how it had a plan

but in more kjhgfghj light news the first thing that experienced was the joy of trick or treaters thinking its cool and all thats clothes came from a halloween store and a weird lil girl who gave it her witch hat

after that it wasnt seen for several more months aside from some glances such as being seen on cctv and so on until that found where norman osborn lives and made itself at home

now norman canonly dies in this universe and thats important to gobbys arc cause that doesnt let the world know its out there until norman is no more as that was spending all its time terrorising him for fun and well, that enrichment is gone now, and that wants to play

speaking of norman in this universe is a fuck! :)

pearl already didnt like him prior to the bite cause he owns the building flick lives in and keeps bringing the rent up so everyones struggling and when you see how that effects your family yoru gonna form some strong opinions

i will admit i dont have a lot for him but i do have he has his whole terrorism thing going on by calling himself the green terror and doign that shit after work which leads to his death and thats kjhgfghj all i have but its more than what i have for flint

moving on!! rhino is very heavily inspired by tssm cause i love it so much

his full name is aleksei o'hirn-sytsevich but everyone whos not his mothers side of the family call him alex and hes a trans man!! his mums a first generation russian immigrant and his dads a third generation irish immigrant but he doesnt feel like he belongs to either culture

hes got giganticism! hes pretty good at not causing problems for himself or others by being big but when he was younger he was like a bull in a china shop

his backstory here is he was just a petty thief but then he ended up seeing somethings he shouldnt have and even though he wasnt gonna tell he was still grabbed for it to be safe and then just sorta gaslit and manipulated to getting the suit on so he couldnt tell people

as fucked up as that is hes jsut going along with it jhfdghj like it could be worse hes not dead yknow

and lastly sandman!! i really dont have a lot im afraid

i do have hes a amab enby and is in a relationship with alex cause once again i love tssm and hes got a death hawk that he never properly styles cause he cant be bothered to kjhgfghj

what little i have of a origin for him is just oscorp is involved and its all started cause of alexs disappearence cause he Knows he wouldnt just skip town without telling like 12 people first

so welcome to this essay im so normal

[eerna]

Maybe I’m an outlier but I really really enjoyed Netflix SaB. I knew it was going to be a completely different story from the get-go when they cast the Crows. Did they include them bc the showrunners knew more people had read SoC than SaB? Probably. Does it change basically everything? Absolutely. But I liked the mashup. It’s the “what if they knew each other??” AU fic I didn’t know I wanted. (Love your takes btw)

That’s even better!!! I too am happy with it bc I consider it an AU, but like, I am also sad bc it could have been such a good thing. And thank youu~~

After reading your reactions to the show i realize i agree with a lot u said AND I DIDNT NOTICE WHILE SEEING THE SHOW like what happens with the dregs in season 2 now? Also that kanej...... but its ok i mean i think now a part of me is pretending this is a new story with new characters that i like but not As Much as the books?? Or a universe where Soft Kaz is a thing?? But they took away the fuckboy disease from Mal, made Malina really good and Alina super relatable and cool so i say is a win for us

IT IS A WIN!!! Maybe the Crows got wrecked, but they gave me a TGT plotline I enjoy, and a show I really like, so. Def one of better book-to-screen adaptations I’d seen, even if MY fave parts were omitted.

I have finished the whole season and AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH there are so many moments that made me want to scream (the good kind of screams)

The crows are still not completely our crows but theyre getting there

I was never a darklina or a malina fan but the show made me love malina, the mal actor has done a terrific job

All of them have actually made an incredible job and i want a second season right now

YAS I truly hope they get that shiny s2. Please. Please

I do agree that the kanej we are seeing is not the kanej from the books but i think that so far its okay? From the way i see it this kaz is still very much in the inej is an investment fase and we are seeing the beginning of the crows, of the start of their trust in each other. They might fuck it up later and i live in fear of that but so far its not terrible.

However i really hope they enforce a bit more on the whole kaz aversion to touching people, i feel like they didnt explore it much but since the crows weren't the focus right now i can kind of excuse it.

I have some complaints about the way they handled the mixing of the storylines but overall its not the worst thing they could have done.

Kaz is def not in the investment stage during this show, he is very vocal about Inej’s importance and humanity jdskbabcjk. But yes, the touch thing didn’t come in focus a lot, but I liked that moment in ep 1 when the guy was holding him down with a naked hand and you could SEE how much it pained him! New watchers wouldn’t notice, but once they learn the truth, they would get it. Hhuhu. And yeah it could have been worse...

[aspecpplarebeautiful]

I wanna be proud of being ace, but like. I feel like I’m sexualising myself? If that makes sense? And also sexualising my peers. I’m a minor, so I feel like it’s bad that I’m even discussing my ace-ness, esp since I’m gray ace so I feel sexual attraction sometimes, even if rarely. Is it true that it’s weird to be proud of being ace? Esp at a young age? I just. It’s the discussion of sexual attraction and relations between teenagers, and ik that society is still weird about that, looking at you netflix, but still. Am I contributing to the sexualisation of minors? I def think literal children are off limits for saying wether they’re allo or ace bcus theyre children and they don’t even know yet, particularly with sexual attraction, bcus kids don’t feel sexual attraction. I think. And hope. And the argument of if they can id as straight then they can id as ace and it’s like neat! But also they didn’t even choose to id as straight thats society baby. And people saying they’re straight are probably focusing on the romantic part, not the sexual one. I’m getting off topic here. But like. I’m 14. Am I sexualising kids/teenagers? It’s weird to think people my age even feel sexual attraction tbh, (including me lmao) but I think that’s a common ace feel. I think. But am I? It’s implying the rest of them who are allo are, well, allo. And it’s not like society doesn’t consider that. They teach sex ed and have the cursed netflix shows and discuss things and crushes and stuff. But. I just can’t get over it. Am I sexualising others? Am I being overshary? I want to come out to my family, but does my mom really want to hear about how her child doesn’t feel sexual attraction except sometimes? I have this friend who says this kinda stuff all the time and also is an exclusionist, which uh,,, I’m not an idiot, they probably contributed a lot to me thinking like this. But are they right? Do I have internalized aphobia? Am I sexualising people? Idk I’m just. Agh :(

Alright so let’s start with the main question. I’m not sure what you mean by sexualizing your peers, but it’s very normal and natural to think of people your own age in a sexual way. Generally speaking I separate feelings that are largely outside of your control with actions, most 14 year olds will naturally think of other 14 year olds in a sexual way. But it’s still important to be respectful of people and boundaries and not actively sexualize anyone who doesn’t want it or hasn’t given consent. But yeah, generally speaking at 14 hormones are fairly strong and people are learning to deal with them for the first time and these thoughts are going to come up and that’s OK. 

Sexualizing minors is definitely an issue, but the big issue is adults sexualizing minors. (And god wouldn’t it be nice if we could start having more shows about younger adults figuring their shit out and navigating life if you wanted to do a show about young sexy people? The actors are usually that age already anyways.) And honestly a lot of your peers are definitely having similar thoughts and going through similar things. 

Children can actually experience sexual attraction, when people start experiencing sexual attraction can vary widely. It’s important to acknowledge this because people who do start experiencing it young need to know their experiences are normal too.

Sexual attraction, or looking at people sexually isn’t a moral flaw. Sexuality isn’t morally wrong. It’s important to respect things like consent and healthy boundaries, but generally speaking sexuality on its own is normal and healthy. You may benefit from looking into the sex positivity movement, sometimes they forget about asexuality a bit which is an issue (newer stuff is better though), but it’s important to see that perspective too, and unlearn the more puritanical ‘sex and sexuality is a sin’ idea our culture tends to push.

Yeah you can be a minor and ace or gray ace (both or whichever you prefer). As said above, actually at 14 a lot of people are experiencing sexual attraction already. People are still going through puberty until their late teens/early 20′s, so it’s always possible your orientation is still developing until then, and some teens do prefer to hold off, but it’s a personal choice. And whatever happens in the future doesn’t change that something is true now. It’s fine to go with and identify with how you feel right now.

For literal children identifying as ace (I’m assuming you mean like under 10 here), honestly that’s usually not an issue because of the way our brains develop, young children haven’t reached a point yet where they’re solidifying their identities and orientations. That usually starts to happen during the pre-teen and young teenage years. 

But also there’s no harm done in trying on a label and realising later that that label doesn’t fit. It’s a normal and healthy part of figuring out identity to look into and consider different ones and try them on.

I have to be honest that I was reading through this ask and wondering what you were reading/seeing, because a lot of this comes from exclusionist rhetoric. Exclusionist rhetoric is also very very good at getting into your head and making you doubt yourself or feel guilty for being your own orientation/hate your own orientation. This may sound extreme but this friend is probably not a very good friend to you, and if they don’t know you’re ace it will likely get worse if they find out.

Ace exclusionism (actually any form of lgbtqia+ exclusionism) acts as a hate group, they target specific groups and base their identity around their hate/fear of that group. The tactics are the same, they exaggerate the power of the targeted group to make them appear like a threat, downplay their oppression, and actively target and harass those groups, and slowly become an echo chamber.

At the very least I really strongly recommend following ace people and ace blogs so you are getting good information and can build up a support for your identity. Remember exclusionists will often lie, fact check anything you hear from them, but you’ll probably see too just from watching the ace community yourself that the picture they paint doesn’t match up to reality at all. 

So please take care of yourself and watch out for yourself.

All the best, and good luck!

[sw33t-oubliette]

OKAY STRAP IN BITCH/AFF THIS GETS WILD

it starts with me evan writing a letter to himself, which his therapist told him to do to improve his confidence, letter got put into text here, and then the absolute BANGER that is anybody have a map starts, i cant do it justice by explaining it just listen to it

and uuh its about evan an connor's moms trying to figure out how tf to handle mentally ill teenagers-

evan and connor bump into eachother at school and connor pushes him and sets off WAVING THROUGH A WINDOOOOOWW

AND !!!!! the whole falling in a forest part is about how uh.*clears throat*.he attempted suicide in a forest by jumping off a tree.thats how he broke his arm

ANYWay after that he starts writing letter 2 which you can read here

after he writes letter 2 connor signs his cast, VERY plot important

then connor confronts evan abt letter 1 which he found in the computer lab, ends up not giving it back, this is where it gets . very Dark

connor kills himself . and they find evans letter to himself and assume evan was their friend. connors parents ask evan about it and he denies it but theyre like "BUT LOOOK !!! YOUR CAST !!!!!! THEY WERE BESTIES ABSOLUTELY" and evan HAS to confirm the allegations because how do you even convince them otherwise.

time skip evan gets invited over to dinner and . for forever starts

evan says they had emails to eachother and he HAS to keep making stuff up and now him and jared have to make fake emails . jareds reaction to this is "yknow his parents think you guys were gay lovers right" which isnt plot relevant but i lost my shit the first time i watched it over that ok anyway next thing

evan and jared start writing the letters, starting SINCERELY, MEEEEEE

evan shows connors parents the emails, family argument shit happens, connor's sister zoe drops this absolute amazing song

evan and zoe talk in connors room, evan has to keep carrying the lie, WAHHHH SONG AGAIN, IF I COULD TELL HER

time skip, everything went back to normal FUCK everybody forgot abt connor his memory fucking disappeared, "once theyve forgotten about me, what do you think happens to you. i mean nobody cares about people like us", DISAPPEAR STARTS

evan gets forced to do a speech at an assembly abt connor, fucking bombs it man .rolls up into a ball mid stage and fucks it all up. but the speech gets posted to the connor project website (the connor project is a project dedicated to keeping connors memory alive that alana [not related to anybody],evan and jared run) WHOP ANOTHER SONG .STARTS SINGING MID STAGE AND IT GETS CARRIED ON AFTER THE VIDEO GETS PUT ON THE WEBSITE

and uuuuh at the end of the song . wahhhhh evan and zoe are dating now .ok

ACT ONE DONE. WE'RE NOT DONE YET WE STILL HAVE A WHOLE NOTHER ACT . IT GETS WORSE

alana and evan start a fundraiser to reopen the apple orchard, jared makes up more shit for the made up shit and evan shuts it down, FUCK EVANS MOM FINDS OUT ABOUT EVERYTHING THEYRE ARGUING, evan apparently doesnt have anxiety issues anymore (HES FUCKING LYING HE VERY MUCH DOES), evan and connors dad bonding which leads to a song:

zoe goes over to evans house, the anxiety issues he VERY OBVIOUSLY STILL HAS appear again, ANOTHER AMAZING SONG

next day FUCKING ALANA IS PUTTING UP THE EMAILS ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️ ON THE WEBSITE

jared hates evan now fuck

akward ass Murphy and hansen family meetup, oh my god theyre paying for evans college, evan is literally having a mental breakdown on a chair off to the side, okay evans mom denied the college stuff, ALERT THE MOMS R FIGHTING

oh no. the angst is happening. song time i . guess.the song explains all you need to know

https://open.spotify.com/track/7FIrk5lA1IalpZ3OtieeC8?si=4Ai_0wOSTy6hzOZjfPVo4g

evan considers just coming clean like he should but fucking cant . "HOWD YOU BREAK YOUR ARM EVAN. DID YOU FALL OR DID YOU LET GO.". everythings going downhill. he wrote a fake suicide note WHICH IS LITERALLY JUST LETTER 2 WHICH IS SO GENUINELY TRAGIC. the murphys are fighting again. hes telling the truth now uhoh its all falling apart . song commences

https://open.spotify.com/track/32bZDrurIGh2Cts0l2tRtL?si=5xF6Z_LXQ0uaOCV6jbbfDA

evan self depreciation time, ANOTHER SONG

https://open.spotify.com/track/5M2LiZ8SmRFWl1IJ0F7JNR?si=3zHBRVPFSryUkpfqNkYPxg

okay literally crying as i type this

its the end now. Timeskip, zoe talks to evan at the apple orchard, evan is still severely fucked up, honestly nobody got that much better mentally, another song and its a Mashup of other stuff from earlier and you know im a sucker for that

https://open.spotify.com/track/7vU9VpbmB4ZoztAigpXLlJ?si=RF4BccKlSh-4QZbXXs4Qgg

and thats. it. i honestly probably sucked explaining this im so sorry go watch the og musical on youtube (theres multiple slime tutorials of it it wont be hard to find) bc i did not explain that well i think

somebody who knows barely anything or nothing about dear evan hansen please ask me about it because 1 i want need to infodump right now and 2 its so fucking shocking if you know nothing about it and i need to be the person to tell you about it because i know everything abt it(literally evan irl) and im objectively right abt it (literally evan irl part 2)

[sanchoyo]

danny phantom, season 3, episodes 7-13 thoughts! cannot believe im finishing this series so fast. ...cannot believe it ended like that...uh. one of the weirdest finales to a show I think I've seen, it really stood out against the rest of the series, and not in a good way, in my opinion. I paused to yell in caps lock...several times, I think, out of anger... BUT. ANYWAY, HERE WE GO.

see prev episode thoughts in this tag <3

-the fentons putting the kids to Work in the lab, with NO SAFETY GEAR. AT ALL. THEY JUST GOT BACK FROM SCHOOL AND ARE TIRED!!! and when jack asked how danny his day was and danny tried to say it was bad jack cut him off :( for the 400th time, i am stealing these kids.

-maddie and jack IMMEDIATELY SELLING THEIR LAB AND WORK FOR A LOT OF MONEY. and danny cant get into the portal anymore, oh no!!! he could always just steal vlads I Guess.

-THEY ARE VLADS NEW NEIGHBOR. OH MY GOD. this is a sitcom format. a butler came with the new mansion. i would absolutely try a kiwi fudge milkshake, why is the butler disgusted.

-the..guys in white bought the lab to shoot a missile. into the ghost zone thru the portal. bro i hate these guys

-jazz straight up setting her new bedroom up in the library. i am very very jealous

-"RATED E, FOR ENTRAILS"

-I like how the 14 year olds very quickly realize if the giw destroy the ghost zone itll destroy OUR ZONE because its just. like. the other side of the quarter so to speak. and the giw, a fully funded government agency, didnt consider that...(or worse, are willing to risk that anyway...)

-a...graphic novel version of the constitution? what in the world have you been READING SAM

-'cool, I always wanted to be called a meddling kid!' scooby doo reference...

-can they keep the butler. I love him.

-ecto latte....I also want to try that. is ectoplasm edible...

-YESS I KNEW DANNY WOULD USE VLAD'S PORTAL. vindicated.

-DANNY WHY DIDNT YOU JUST ASK JOHNNY NICELY. STEALING HIS BIKE IS SO SO RUDE.

-youngblood is also into astronaut stuff, thats really cute. and him being like 'phantom, dude!! :D' ALL EXCITED. THATS ADORABLE.

-the slapstick comedy of the giw slipping and falling and running into shit in the lab. is funny, but also, because this lab has NOOO safety codes in practice. god its a wonder dannys the only one to have died here...

-JOHNNY, SKULKER AND YOUNGBLOOD HELPING DANNY!!! I keep saying it but the other ghosts helping him. is my fav thing in the world. and, it's a really good thing the missile in the real world was harmless...otherwise the fentons wouldn't have had a home/lab to come back to...

-WULF WANTED POSTER!!! we havent seen wulfy in so long :( very funny the box ghost is offended by how much these ghosts are wanted for. first off, what do ghosts even DO WITH MONEY. does the ghost zone have its own currency??? what are ghosts BUYING

-the box ghost is So Funny, im so glad hes still got his bubble wrap. u are VERY wanted in THIS house box ghost. you are SO scary king. dont give up on ur dreams

-this needs to be a meme format. I made a transparent version, very very messily, for future use.

-this is a Fellow and a Friend

-box ghost accidentally bringing lunch for everyone, and giving people at the mall free shoes. SHOES ARE SO EXPENSIVE, ID BE SO GRATEFUL. helpful king. i feel SO bad for him lmao, he's putting in SO much effort. he wants the evil aesthetic So bad but hes Just Too Silly. I understand your plight, box ghost....

-oh my god. pandoras BOX. 'THOSE OF US IN THE BOX TRADE' HOW MANY ARE IN THIS BOX TRADE. I WANT IN. pandora is a multi-armed ghost goddess and i love her.

-SKULKER WHY ARE YOU RUNNING FROM THE EVIL UNICORN?? YOURE A HUNTER!! JUST SHOOT IT!!!!!!! JUST HUNT IT!!!

-box ghost...where did you get the cowboy hat. I respect it, i just want to know

-JAZZ COMING IN WITH THE BAZOOKA TO FIGHT THE 10 HEADED DRAGON!!! YEAH!!!!!!!!!!! and the rest of the fentons I Guess

-ignoring the sam/danny moments. I simple do not see them.

-...why doesnt danny just fly over the maze. or do the whole 'real world people act as ghosts in the ghost zone' and turn back!!! I know its just to show off the ghost greek monster designs. but STILL.

-danny being like. um. hi pandora. i found your box. >< polite...PANDORA IS SO GIANT. GIANT GHOST WOMAN. SHES GOING TO BEAT BOX GHOSTS ASS. another ghost thats nice to danny to add to the list :) and HER FORCING BOX GHOST TO APOLOGIZE. and having sandwiches with danny after making box ghost clean up. I LOVE HER.

-DANNYS 'BEWARE' AT THE END JAKHDJFKN

-okay, when dash pulled out danny's seat and was calling him buddy, for half a second I was like 'this is a prank, hes gonna pull it back' BUT THEN FRIGHT KNIGHT MY BELOVED IS BACK. AND EVERYONE STARTS CHANTING FOR DANNY TO BEAT HIS ASS WITH GHOST POWERS AND DANNY DOES WAY TOO EASILY, and im like, yup, this is a dream LMAO

-danny is getting an A+ in science :) my smart son

-DANNY WAKING UP FROM THE DREAM RIGHT BEFORE KISSING SAM AND BEING LIKE 'that was a dream...no, a NIGHTMARE!' same. not to be a hater but, shouldve been val. maybe I am a hater

-...danny running and checking the 'tapes'...why is his whole house constantly being recorded. hes been in ghost form/fights plenty of times in his house. does he have to run and wipe the tapes after?? every single time?? god

-letting this image speak for itself

-this is SO cursed

-NOCTURN'S DESIGN FUCKS SO HARD. the Venice mask vibes. also his space pattern not moving while the rest of his animation does is big chowder vibes. but this guy is basically the sandman but Evil, huh. I love dream plots. also, nocturn's design feels very similar to clockwork, like, red eyes and a scar over the same eye, but also just the purple, and the Cosmic Vibes. I want to see them fight. anyway nocturn's va was also avatar roku AND alfred in several batman cartoons.

-the 'sleepwalkers' designs were super cute in shape (kinda remind me of oogie boogie! pillow-cased shaped, which is appropriate for the 'king of dreams's minions) until I looked closer at their eyes. why do they look sewn shut!! (they open their eyes a few times, so they aren't, but they look like it...)

-I like how this show has been pretty consistent (with a few exceptions) about a Ghost Being Huge (or getting larger) = Very Powerful

-2 months of summer camping??? wtf, do camping things usually take that long?? I've never been to a camping...thing like that. but isnt that basically their entire summer??

-'the entirety of nature is your bathroom!' and thats why I do no camping despite loving nature LMAO.

-sam, at least TRY TO BE NICE TO THE OTHER GIRLS YOU'RE GOING TO BE SHARING A CABIN WITH. also, the amount of times people in this show have their SHOES ON THE BED!!! IM DISGUSTED

-swamp creature Is A Ghost. Big Foot is a Ghost. starting to think in this universe, every single cryptid or legend is a Ghost Actually

-paulina crying not only because star is missing, but because SHE FORGOT HER SUNBLOCK AND SHE BURNS SO EASILY!!!! okay girlfriends

-ghost cops are the real monsters at the camp. i.......I mean. fair. no one missed you walker

-WULF!!!!!!!!!!! WULF IS BACK!!!!!!!! MY FRIEND WULF :D MI AMAS VIN!!!!! kaj danny lernis Esperanto :)

-'relax kid, we arent here to do any harm' *immediately shoots danny* yeah. ghost cops. and also danny bringing walker 'wulf' and walker IMMEDIATELY SUCKING DANNY IN A THERMOS. FUCK OFF

-haha walker Bald. and haha walker Frozen Now

-the fenton thermos can...reverse its polarity to close portals? okay

-LIBERA MIA AMIKO. :")

-ohhh they end the ep with them star gazing, thats pretty cute...

-dani is back! ...with a new voice actress? wiki says AnnaSophia was in 3 diff movies in 2007 when this aired, so she was probably too busy... (including, bridge to terabithia aka the movie that ripped my heart out that I mentioned in the first ep Dani was in...kinda wanna rewatch it now)

-shes still scared of vlad, who's still being creepy and spying on her. 'shes hardly going to come home to daddy!' I WONDER WHY. also does vlad's cat look more evil than last time? love the concept of him going shopping for cats and being like 'give me your most EVILEST looking cat, please, so I can pet it in my spinny chair dramatically!' ...oh god white cat hair on his black suit. I have a black cat and her hair is still way too noticeable..

-vlad has a big 'valerie' button in his office. can he be pressing that button every episode, thanks

-'theres a GIRL called dani phantom?' yeah valerie. no relation, obviously, even with her looking EXACTLY like danny. so sad valerie just wants to help her dad and her get out of the place theyre in now and vlad using her. ill MAUL HIM

-dani having to STEAL FOOD. :( and valerie immediately being like oh poor kid :(( and trying to help her!!! and then dani immediately helping valerie!! this episode is starting SO well

-...and then valerie catching her. DAMN IT. and being surprised dani knew danny?? HELLO VALERIE I KNOW YOURE SMARTER THAN THIS. I AM SO SORRY THEY WROTE YOU THIS WAY. I STILL LOVE AND BELIEVE IN U !!!

-valerie lying her ASS off for a chance at gettin danny. ok <3 also 'they couldnt catch a ghost if it was living under their own roof' JSDHKJHNK

-danny. why dont you just tell valerie!! this would be so much easier if he was direct. there is NO way valerie would hurt danny (fenton) she'd be HORRIFIED. esp since she got on board helping dani!!

*is held* :)

-look at valerie and danny. flying together. about to go beat vlads ass together <333

-DANI SCREAMING AS VLAD IS MELTING HER. WHAT THE FUCCCK

-...fucking vlad convincing valerie hes a good dude with his stupid duplication. FUCK. DANNY JUST TELL H E R

-jesus christ how many times has danny had to watch loved ones die. even if she didnt stay perma-dead. glad they fixed her...

-valerie and dani pranking danny when he came out, oh :( cute...them havin fun and laughing together...babies

-BUT THEYRE JUST LETTING DANI LEAVE, AGAIN??? SHE WAS PREVIOUSLY STEALING FOOD. CHRIST GIVE HER A PLACE TO LIVE. OR A FAMILY. actually, I think it'd be really cute if, since danny isnt ready to out himself, dani went and lived with valerie?? dunno if her dad would have the money but,, it'd be a cute concept. big sis valerie...

-'tomorrow, it's game on!' 'and ill be ready to play!' THE FLIRTING....DANNY/VALERIE REAL

-oh my god,, valerie found out about vlad in the end. But he doesn’t know she knows!!! the DRAMA!!! HOLY SHIT THAT ENDING.

-this episode was. SO Much and probably one of my favorites out of s3. (I mean, there has been a gross lack of valerie this whole season, so thats not a hard choice to make...)

-FINALE EPISODE TIME.

-the title screen looks different! so no title card...

-vlad has his own fucked up satellite that looks like him?? okay. why does the animation look so different?? are they mixing cg in?? for what. anyway, vlad and the gang in SPACE. danny is 100% living his astronaut dreams rn

-'defeating frostbite' YOU BETTER NOT HAVE. YOU STOLE HIS COOL MAP. FUCK YOU VLAD

-wait oh my god. vlad is the final series boss, isn't he. I half expected a fake out, for another boss to show up midway, and for him to finally have to have a real truce with danny for this ep. ITS THE FINALE. VLAD FEELS SO UNDERWHELMING.

-And it's like-- his character isn't bad, i just feel like..he has more potential! they WANT him to seem like some smart super evil genius, but the way he's written makes that SO hard to believe...but the solid backstory and design is THERE and its FRUSTRATING.

-...DANNY CALLING VLAD OUT SAYING HE NEEDS THERAPY LMAOO THATS WHAT IVE BEEN SAYING.

-my grandpa technus is in the finale too :) 'well look on the bright side, at least im not downloading them illegally!' he says while stealing dvds. feels like hes calling me out. im watching this series on a bootleg website lmao. anyway, him turning the tech into a transformer. love that

-mASters BLASters sTOp diSAsterS shut the fuck up. you will never be valerie or danny. bite chomp kill. violence

-like this if u crie everytiem

-my god the 3d/cgi mixed in looks SO BAD IT DIDNT AGE WELL AT ALL

-the white stripe in dannys hair kinda rules tho. did he just KILL HIS GHOST HALF??? 'revert his human half back to normal' UM. you ever unkill yourself. why are his friends/jazz so mad about it, he'll be in a lot less danger!! christ. they can still hunt ghosts!! as humans!! if they want to!! hes 14 if he wanted to be normal. let him. vlads stupid little team has things COVERED apparently. why are they acting like this. jazz would never act like this. is this fake whats going ON

-oh my god jack was in a college band. vlad was also in the band. what did instruments they play. i didnt need that headline to tell me they sucked, but i want to KNOW MORE REGARDLESS

-valerie was here for 0.3 seconds.

-sam calling danny selfish. the audacity. no one is stopping YOU from hunting ghosts, girl. valerie does it!!

-I'm halfway through the episode and incredibly underwhelmed so far.

-why would they send jack and 3 teens to space to destroy the asteroid. why not professional astronauts. not even the 3 teens that have already been to space this episode...

-jack getting beat up by teenagers. ON TV. IN SPACE. I GUESS. I GUESS EVERYONE AGREED TO SEND JACK BECAUSE..VLAD SAID SO? we know it was to embarrass jack, but why would everyone agree. why didnt any other space program Do More or whatever, they sent like, 3 rockets/missiles tops?? no way

-danny attempting to punch vlad in the face. i WISH HE WOULDVE LANDED THAT HIT.

-vlad outed himself on live tv, on purpose? and BLASTED AT THE TEENAGERS HE HIRED. LMAO. HES HOLDING THE WORLD HOSTAGE, MAKING THEM PAY HIM BILLIONS TO STOP THE STUPID ASTROID. THATS YOUR GRAND PLAN??? REALLY. REALLY. im like. lmfao

-jack just now, on the last episode GETTING TOLD HE MADE VLAD A GHOST. THIS SHOULDVE HAPPENED WAY SOONER. jack's reaction was one of the only times in this entire show hes seemed human. 'an old friend? no. you? yes.' GET HIS ASSSS ACTUALLY. HE STRAIGHT UP LEFT VLAD IN SPACE. GOD DAMN. that is a Murder! I mean, I guess vlad could fly back to earth, but...I mean, he'll have to, right? no food in space. (that we KNOW of...)

-'thE WHolE EArtH, INTangiBLe?!' oh my god.

-...the white strand of hair somehow still had ghost dna, I guess, and getting blasted turned him back into phantom. I GUESS. I GUESS.

-the fentons being the first to clap for danny despite not knowing hes phantom...that was sweet. and very sudden character development, not at all gradual over the course of time or episodes like it probably should have been...

-sam and danny kissing. IT SHOULDVE BEEN VALERIE, BUT OKAY, I GUESS. also, its a little underwhelming, considering theyve kissed already...

-ALL of the ghosts being ready to beat danny's ass? really. no they wouldn't, they've worked together before, and some of those ghosts are friendly!! cringe. why is the last ep written like this. I mean they came thru at the last minute but. was really cringing for a minute there, why did they write it like that

-valerie is there for another 0.3 seconds! ....she should've been more involved. dani is also there! for also like 0.3 seconds. almost fast enough to miss. (btw, I think shes still homeless at this point, are, we going to...do ANYTHING ABOUT THAT IN THE LAST 5 MINS OF THE SHOW)

-the cgi smoke or whatever it is. this whole post is me saying the cgi is bad, but IT IS.

-'danny or should we say. DAAANNNNY.' this is like the 3rd or 4th time hes been outed damn, but to the whole world, again. and valerie saw, and is just. an extra in the bg clapping. bro im so mad.

-TUCKER IS THE NEW MAYOR? WHAT THE FUCK?? HES 14.

-i think. this is still linked to the dream ep a few times ago. hes still dreaming. this is a plot a 14 year old would write. this feels like a bad fanfic. so much got rushed, and not tied up. vlad wasnt really even the villain this episode, a fucking. non-being asteroid was.

-they kiss again. ok. sure. whatever at this point.

-VLAD IS NOW A FREE-ROAMING SPACE NOMAD. I GUESS. THATS. SURE. WHATEVER. THE END, I GUESS. cannot believe I'm saying this, but: they did vlad dirty.

-IF YOU'RE GOING TO MAKE HIM A VILLAIN, MAKE HIM A VILLAIN!!! DON'T MAKE IT A METEOR!!! STOP BEING WISHY WASHY WHO WANTS TO SEE DANNY VS ASTEROID!!! I didnt even WANT vlad to be the final villain because his character is SO back and forth (esp this season.) but he has done some FUCKED UP SHIT AND I WANTED THE WRITERS TO DOUBLE DOWN, PERSONALLY, IF THEY HAD TO MAKE HIM THE FINAL BOSS. the cabin ep where he basically held danny and maddie hostage? FUCKED. THE DANI THING? FUCKED. FUCKING COMMIT AND MAKE HIM ACTUALLY SCARY OR HAVE HIM FUCK OFF AND AGREE TO A TRUCE!! WHAT IS THIS DYING IN SPACE NONSENSE. (and, he will (fully) die out there, right? still half human, still needs food and water. I imagine he'll like, slowly half-die but this time his human side is dying. will he come back 100% ghost? we dONT KNOW. WE DONT GET TO SEE, ITS PLAYED LIKE SOME FUNNY THING AT THE END, THEN THATS IT!!! WHAT!!!)

-I don't know how to articulate how FRUSTRATING THAT IS. having him basically out himself and ''hold the world hostage'' does not track at all in my brain. like. he's always been scary because he is HUMAN, TOO. like, if he was 100% ghost, he'd be LESS scary, but vlad MASTERS has more power and influence than vlad PLASMIUS because of his position as mayor, his money, too, and his (supposed, s3 made me doubt it) intelligence/manipulation skills, and his being in good graces with jack made it HARD FOR DANNY. him outing himself for,, money and to 'control the world' i guess?? MONEY WAS NEVER HIS LIKE, MAIN GOAL. yeah obv he likes money and is materialistic and values his Rich Life, but hes got billions, the end goal? 1. getting maddie (and or danny as his son, but to me he always treated that as secondary) 2. ruining jack. this feels like they wanted to say 'oh he just wants POWER' which is. HMM?? OKAY?? obv he /does/ want power (usually over certain ppl, tho), but seeing him try to get it like this FELT WEIRD SOMEHOW. weird like the ep where he tried and failed to take over various historical civilizations, because like,, how is that realistically going to do anything for him?? just, being in that time forever and never seeing maddie aka Goal #1 again?? HELLO??? this was like that, but worse

-this was such a weird ending to an entire show. why did season 3 only have 13 episodes?? why did it feel so weirdly paced?? WHY WAS THE ENDING LIKE THAT. I think. I am going to pretend I did not see that. fucked up, dudes. I'm like...hm. I shouldn't have watched that because now I'm mad. valerie sweetie im SO sorry you shouldve been more present. it felt like..if they knew this season was going to be short, and the last season, they should've spent more time wrapping up EVERYONE'S plot lines for the entire season. imagine how cool it wouldve been if every single ep of season 3 was working towards something, a big, nice wrap up at the end, with nothing feeling TOO rushed because they'd been heading towards the End for the whole season....

I will probably end up writing a follow up full series thoughts post. In a couple of days so I can sit with my thoughts. BUT. overall, I really liked the show! (ignoring the finale and some of the moments that aged pretty poorly...) it was charming and a fun concept and very fun to watch in general :) and I am pretending the finale didnt happen <3 and I’m gonna dive RIGHT into the dp tags and mix fanart and posts in my queue, very excited to run and look at that 🏃🏻 (and, of course, make more fanart myself hehe >:3)

[loststormtrooper]

Ive been slowly reading the Splinter Cell books and im almost finished the third one and I have complaints

Spoiler warning I guess for books that are over 10 years old if anyone cares about them.

So the first book was great. They got one of the bond writers to do it and it was so good. Splinter Cells identities have been leaked and Sam Fishers life is at stake throughout the whole thing because for the first time ever, the enemy know who he is. His chapters are in first person which makes everything feel so much more personal. All the other chapters following other characters are in third which gives this nice cutscene kind of feeling that games have when they show something your character wouldnt know. Its a book series based on a game, it just felt right. Sam's daughter gets kidnapped because The Shop (big bad weappns company) wants to stop Third Echelon from getting in the way of their sales and Sam is the one who is trying to stop them and stop them from doing deals with The Shadows which are trying to get the US out of the middle east so their country can take over another. Fisher ends up disrupting these deals and saves his daughter. But like, how it goes is so well. Sams daughter gets invited overseas with her friend and they both ger drugged and kidnapped by someone they thought was their friend! The stakes are high af because they killed off the friend and are going to kill Sams daughter and him if he cant stop all this stuff from happening. And theres the whole war nuclear weapon deals going on that he also has to stop. So good.

Anna Grimsdotir isnt present in this book because they need wiggle room for the next book and shes replaced with Carly who is also an analyst. Theres this nice tight nit friendship between Sams team at Third Echelon with Lambert, Carly, Sam, and and Mike that sets things up for the next book. Also Sams Grav Maga teacher, they flirt a bit, nice side story which leads into the next book. Pretty much everything leads into the next book because even though Sam defeated The Shadows, The Shop is still a major weapons dealer and have the identities of other Splinter Cells and needs to be stopped.

So next book, Operation Barracuda. Sam and his team need to find out who leaked the Splinter Cells information and stop The Shop. Uh oh! It was Mike and he had to kill Carly IN THE THIRD ECHELON OFFICE because she was about to figure out it was him and he escapes and the Triad offer to get him out of the country, he just has to get to the right place and theyll fly him out. Good setup for these cat and mouse chapters where and FBI agent is trying to keep up with Mike. Also Mike was actually planted in Third Echelon years ago and he and his brother have deals with the Triad to sell stuff which The Shop does t like because theure supposed to sell things to them and then they sell to the Triad.

All of these bad guys have one goal though. Theyre dealing with a rogue chinese general that wants to invade Hong Kong. So theres all this infighting and build up to when people, even the bad guys, start to figure more stuff about the other groups. The Triad, being in Hong Kong, dont want to be invaded, but the deals theyve done with bad guy general have provided him with a nuckear submarine that he threatens to detonate on the US coast unless they withdraw from Taiwan.

During all of this that krav maga teacher and Sam have had a few dates and are at Sams place. But when they are walking down the street she is gunned down and Sam is forced to leave her dead body on the street with people around because he cant risk being having anyone looking into who he is, even local police and government because he is in a secret agency. Amazing side story. It's a lot like the side stuff with his daughter in the first book, it gives him more motive outside of it just being a job, these people have killed 2 of his friends, one of which he was really into.

Back to bad guy stuff. FBI guy gets killed by Mikes brother after he goes into a shady place to arrest him. The triad are already there and hes just dead now. But he did arrest Mike so they got info from him which leads same to the Triad. In a pretty cool turn of events the general invades but theres no one to stop him! Oh wait! The Triad takes arms and fights off his army and its rad. Sam had gone into that shady building (just remembered its a night club) and gave them information about the generals attack and then left. It was a different chapter because he wasnt being stealthy, he just walked in and demanded to speak to people and it worked. When all this general vs Triad stuff is happening, Sam is dealing with The Shop. The general is defeated, the leak for the Splinter Cell information is in custody, and The Shop is finally shut down!

Next book... set before the first and has a new writer. All of it is in third person and it doesnt feel like the first for obvious reasons. Theres a handful of spelling errors spread throughout which really take you out of it because now youre thinking about this spelling error.

Starts with Sam having to sneak onto a ship thats going to crash onto the US coast and its packed with radioactive material or bombs? It wasnt clear to me. But he stops it and gets out. Its a pretty one track story whereas the other two books had a handful of stuff going on and it all worked neatly. Third Echelon need to know where the nuclear stuff came from to know who did it. He sneaks back on the ship which is under quarantine and takes a sample or something? There was something about having to get engine manufactuing codes to find out where the ship had done repairs and see where it came from but that branching plot just ends later in the book when Lambert says that his analysts found out where it was from. Sam need to find out where nuclear stuff came from. For reasons i cant remember because nothing in this book is worth remembering half the time, Sam has to go to Chernobyl to collect radiated material to see if they match. Thats not the unmemorable part, how they decided to go there to find it specifically is. Anyway, its a match and they figure out who did it and why by knowing who made the ship and how they got the nuclear material. The whole Chernobyl bit could have been better. It didnt feel like anything was at stake. And there was this awkward side story with a woman who helped him get into the dangerous areas unnoticed where theyd flirt and nothing would come of it and then theres nothing else about her ever again.

Then theres all this stuff of Sam infiltrating other places which leads him to another place which leads him to another place. Its very linear and theres a few chapters where he sneaks into a private island thats impossible to sneak onto but he does and it doesnt feel like anything is at stake. The whole book is about having to find out who did this one almost bombing and poisoned a whole towns water supply with radiated material, making it a wasteland, before the US declares war on the wrong nation for ot. But every time they get more information, they suddenly have more time and need to hurry, but then they do that and get more time but need to hurry! At one point they mention the president will declare war in 24 hours and im pretty sure its been like 4 days since then and nothing.

Also! Theres this terrible character cliche guy i hate. There's like 5 chapters spread out through the book where its this weird guy who is clearly the villain ( not bad guy or terrorist, hes just a bad villain) that talks all fancy and as if hes got this grand plan happening and keeps talking about chess and imagining chess moves after he gets new information. Its annoying and i hate him. Get a new character. It doesnt even have to be him, use one of the heads of the bad guy groups that are already established, god. I've got 6 chapters to go and Sam doesnt even know about that chess bad guy yet.

Tbh im considering skipping the next book because its the same writer and the Conviction books and Blacklist book are written by other people. It hasnt been release who i dont think though. Its all a pseudonym.

So i just finished Splinter Cell Checkmate. Its 2 days after i wrote that whole thing and it gets way better in the last 5 chapters. It was much more fast paced and actiony. The rest of the book was slow and not that interesting. There was a bit that brought back a character from earlier who was shot in the head but the bullet hit ar a weird angle and he was left to die. Sam found him and theres this nice calm part of the chapter of Sam trying to get him out without making his wound worse but he wasnt fast enough and he dies. Then Sam finally gets the location of the annoying chess bad guy with some information from now dead guy. It literally ended with Sam saying "...checkmate " to him which fealt really forced... they never met until now and Sam onlt mentioned chess once in the whole book besides that. I think he played it with a friend for a paragraph while they chatted. Epilogue was ok too. The woman who helped him into Chernobyl was in a wax museume and Sam rocks up with a passport for her to get out and fly back to the US with him. Was weird. They flirted maybe twice halfway through the book and then he rocks up with that. She didnt even know his name until the epilogue because he used an alias.

Anyway, first two books are great, third was super slow but ended ok.

[lordmartiya]

lord Martiya’s Lilanette Week 2018/2019 Day 4

@lilanette-week

This one was quite funny to make, especially as I wrote Adrien’s ability for delusions-and has the most awesome Lila scene I’ve written so far, my little attempt to top the Lila of The Grand Deception. Tell me if what she pulls is comparable, ok?

Day 4: Akumatized

After the ball, things had changed drastically in Marinette’s relationships. After taking advantage of the opening provided by their common friend, Lila had done her best to impress her-and had done a good enough job she could have had her way with her, had she not showed more restraint than even Lila herself thought (it had been obvious in hindsight that the Italian girl had really wanted that), impressing Marinette even more in the process. Enough that, before they kissed (and Lila had given her more than enough time to move away), Marinette had proposed they exchanged their hair ribbons.

Now half the school was likely convinced they were dating, something that Marinette would have once been dreading due the chance of Adrien joining the group too… Except she wasn’t minding too much, she had noticed a couple days previously while she and Tikki put up a few pictures of Lila in her room. She had even started talking more smoothly to Adrien and transferred some of the stutter to Lila-especially whenever the fox girl would suddenly come too close with her face.

On the other hand she had been growing a bit irritated with Alya and Nino, as they seemed to have made their mission to keep her from staying alone with Lila and pushing her into Adrien’s arms. And she wasn’t the only one growing irritated, considering the previous day she had seen Lila venting by going to the two guys who had been bullying Nathaniel and Marc over their relationship and tricking them into punching each other’s fist-sure, it had ended any homophobic bullying at their school for the time being, but Lila still had got two guys to shatter their hands.

Thus, given she had a date with Lila planned for after the school, she had decided to confront them on that as soon as they arrived to school before her very irascible love interest got Akumatized again-and of course they were denying everything.

“Guys, I’m not stupid.” Marinette replied.

“But I’m starting to fear they are.” a strangely familiar voice pointed out. Marinette looked to see and, much to her, Alya’s and Nino’s very understandable surprise and shock, they found Rena Rouge. “I mean, they should know that this way they’re far too likely to bring back my superior death-tailed counterpart…”

Just as Marinette registered that “Rena Rouge” had repeated the pun made by the Minefield while Alya wasn’t there but Lila was, a fist suddenly became visible through her and an orange glow dissolved Rena Rouge-and revealed Volpina, wearing Lila’s jacket over her costume.

“What did you say about Rena Rouge and Volpina?!” and of course Alya had to take offense at being called inferior to Volpina.

“I’m saying that Rena Rouge, differently from me, can’t actually play the dizi flute, must remember to tell Ladybug I can give her some lessons.” Volpina replied. “That and, no matter how good she’ll become with the power of illusions, she just isn’t ruthless enough to use it at its fullest-I mean, I doubt she’d even think to use an illusion showing her taking someone hostage like I did.”

“Mmmgrr…”

“But that’s not important right now. What is important, Marinette, is that right now I’ve got the power of illusion and I’m fully in control, and can think of quite a few things to use it for in our date before I call Ladybug and give it up.”

While Marinette tried to guess if this time Volpina was a supervillain or was indeed her Lila with superpowers she saw a familiar mask of light appear before Volpina’s eyes-and her reply was the most awesome thing Marinette had ever seen since her first Miraculous Cure washed over Paris.

“Listen up, a’ stronzo ’ncorvattato, I’m not giving up my plans for the day for your sake, so you’ll better take a day of rest because if you do take away my powers or otherwise interfere with my date I shall scour the world searching for the cheapest copies of the ugliest jewels and pieces of clothing ever made for the Bling-Bling fashion, use them to assemble an outfit so tacky that Adrien Agreste could have his father wrapped around his finger simply by threatening to wear it in public, force you into it, and lock you into a closet with Madame Bourgeois!”

And with that, the light that signaled Papillon talking with an Akumatized villain disappeared while Volpina dusted her hands off, much to the shock of the entire class-both at the threat (because even Chloe could admit her mother was an incredibly nasty person, especially when confronted with a horrible outfit) and the fact it had scared Papillon away.

“Again, Alya, this is why Rena Rouge is inferior: considering half the things I’ve heard about that woman she would never think to make such a threat. Then again, maybe that means she’s a better person.” Volpina continued. Then she turned to Marinette, put a finger under her still open mouth, and asked: “Is this an invitation?”

“Uh? Agh! No! Yes! I mean-! STOP DOING THAT!”

“I just can’t get enough of that. Anyway, still going out with me today?”

“Yes! Yes! My god, that was awesome…”

Volpina smiled… And then the purified Akuma popped out of her left hair ribbon, leaving behind a rather bemused Lila. ____________________________________ As he returned home for the day, Adrien was in a strange mood. On one hand he was happy f0r Marinette and that Lila had turned over a new leaf, but on the other hand he didn’t like that it wasn’t him at Marinette’s side. If he wasn’t already in love with Ladybug he’d swear he was jealous.

“Welcome home, Adrien. How was your day?”

Adrien turned in surprise-his father never came to greet him at the door. That, and he looked strange. Probably some trouble on the job again.

“Just a bit strange-Lila was Akumatized again.” he replied, and feigning to have missed his father’s twitch-he didn’t exactly like Lila, ever since she had admitted her part in the book trouble. “But it was a strange Akumatization, she kept full control and even scared Papillon by threatening to dress him horribly and lock him in a room with Chloe’s mom if he took away her powers.”

“He threatened him with Audrey?! I wouldn’t do that to my worse enemy.”

“She can’t be that bad…”

“She’s worse. Enough I thought Papillon wouldn’t dare to Akumatize her-that’s the whole reason I gave her that second row seat.”

Adrien took a moment to digest the fact his father had dumped Audrey Bourgeois with serial killers and other people that Papillon was too decent and/or intelligent to Akumatize, then continued relating what had happened.

“Anyway, right after that Lila became so happy she accidentally purified the Akuma, and-father? Father?!”

Adrien wondered why did his father just ran and locked himself in his office before activating the security system-it wasn’t like he was Papillon, and even then Lila didn’t have the means to actually enact that threat. Or did she, and his father thought she’d come there believing they had information useful to track him down? After all, they had a book with information on the Miraculouses and Lila had seen it…

What Does the Fox Says

As many of you guys may have noticed, just as Rena Rouge’s design includes nine “tails” (two in the tuxedo-like tails of her costume and the rest in her hair), so Volpina’s design has four (the belt, the side locks and her immense mane of hair)-and given how terrifying Volpina was, a certain someone obviously had to make a pun with the fact one of the Japanese words for “four” sounds like “death”.

Returning with the phrases in Romanesco: this time it translates as “tie-wearing piece of shit” (as many of you guys know, I use “Papillon” rather than “Hawk Moth” because in Italy a “papillon” is the bowtie and allows me to use that pun). I guess that the side effects of Akumatization impaired Lila’s ability to come up with better insults…

[kawaiianimeredhead]

Oh right I wanted to rant. Im still on my phone so there might be typos but oh well

Edit: this got way longer and rambly than I expected oops. I hope this read more works, i never actually checked yesterday when I used it to see if it still worked on mobile so if it doesnt oops and sorry

Anyways. In september a new company took over our contract and thats a whole rant on its own. The previous lead (my dad but not important) left before the new company came and he left Sam in charge. Sam has been there for like four or five years and he's a pretty good guy. When the new cobtract started he was very quickly overwhelmed with the bs and also with the paper abd computer stuff he had to do so he stepped down. Hes still there and actually was still in charge for a bit after he stepped down because we didnt have a new lead.

And now we do have a new lead. This was apparently a Process from what ive heard. Nobody really wanted the job and im not sure how the Boss from the company even went about hiring but i heard that a couple people he considered weren't interested and then I was told that someone was hired or was going to be hired and quick before she even started. I heard these from two differenr people because one told me she qas being walked around and woukd start soon and another said she wasnt coming a day or so later. Someone was hired though and the first night he was there so was the Boss showing him around kinda. I spoke with him a bit and he seemed nice. Def better than the Boss who I cant stand beinf around for long hes got weird and annoying vibes around him.

None of this is actually particularly relevant or necessary for this rant but it came out anyways.

So this new lead has tried all thr different shifts/jobs out and and has been with us for like a month or so now maybe? The first schedule he was properly scheduled on was such a SHIT week/schedule because I went from working 5-4 days a week to 3 and instead of doing bathrooms which is 3 hours or 4 depending on if I'm also doing trash to working 2 hours one day, 2 or 3 the next, and 3 or 4 the last. And it sucks. Then, the first schedule to come out that he made (with the help of the Boss) had ALL of us on less days and hours and HE now working every day but one and working both in the morning AND at night. Now I'm not convinced this was soley his decision because I know he made this schedule with the Boss and i have a suspicion that the Boss encouraged him or persuaded him or some other kind of bull shit to do the schedule like this. And then the week after was the same schedule copied again and this week coming up is the same minus a few small changes.

Now all this is annoying and bull shit on its own but not even the main fuel to this rambling rant. With this schedule, hes scheduled to clean the bathrooms and trash every day except Sunday, which is when I am scheduled on them. Last week was the first week of this and besides the day I'm specificed to do bathrooms im not given a specific job. Imbonly told to do "extras" so ive asked Sam and hes told me to do offices one day and some windows the other. I come in Saturday ready to do the windows which ive been dying to do because they look awful and they used to be my Thing so I get really annoyed about them often but then I notice the trash hadnt been done. So I start doing that thinking maybe that was what I was supposed to be doing. Then while doing this I notice the main breakroom doesnt look particularly clean, breakrooms are a part of the bathroom persons job. This was annoying but because it wasnt Bad I left it. I then go to the next break room which is smaller and always messier because more people stay in it for longer, this one also looked dirtier than it should be. In addition, the bathroom's trash hadnt beeb taken out which is a part of the bathroom job. Bathroom trash is separate from trash trash as far as jobs go, theyre usually done together but if someone is doinf "extras" and someone else bathrooms, bathrooms normally gets bathroom trash abd extras the rest. Something felt really off about the bathroom as well and combined with the breakdowns I had a suspicion that bathrooms hadnt been done. So I decided to check the costumer bathrooms for their trash and their cleanliness. When I got there they absolutely had not been done. Which ! I hadn't planned for. I was taking my time on trash and now I had to do bathroom s.

Nobody had been called or texted about the lead not being at work. And he absolutely has our numbers. We used to sign in on a time sheet and that would have helped us noticed but we recently got a finger print time clock which, as far as I know, we cant check other peoples hours on. So we had no fucking clue he just hadnt been in the previous night.

Then this week comes along. Friday talking with Sam he mentioned something along the lines of not checking the bathrooms. Mentioning that its not really our fault if we dont abd they havent been done because since were not scheduled for them, we have no reason to assume they wouldnt be done. So I hadnt looked in the bathrooms but I did notice the break room looked a bit messy and which had me a bit concerned about a repeat of the previous week. But I didnt wanna do them and I knew Sam didnt either so I left it be but texted nick to ask if hed seen the lead the previous night. Nick confirmed hed been in and was seen cleaning the bathrooms. Yesterday, I briefly looked into the main break room and it looked not great, and then later I went to the bathroom in the smaller breakroom's bathroom (they have really nice soap they buy themselves thats not really importantto this tho) and noticed that one looked AWFUL. It absolutly hadnt been swept and I felt bad but it wasnt what I was scheduled for so I just kinda left it... Their bathroom also had 1ply toilet paper in it, which is what we had when the company first took over it its AWFUL everyone complained so we switched but the unused rolls are still in our closet. Nobody told our new lead this so he had put some of this in the bathrooms. Then later on in the morning, I noticed several trash cans had stuff in it. Not trash but like residue from trash? Like sticky spots of soda oe coffee, some gum, things like that. Basically things that pointed to him only dumping out the trash and not changing the bag. The bags dont always get changed everyday, thats not really an issue, but if theres something still kinda in them they normally are changed because thats gross and why would it just be left like that... I also noticed that up front by the entrance door none of the trash had been got. The busiest area for trash (from customers) and it was still ! There! And I had actually heard Friday or last Friday that this wasnt the first time. Again I left it because I had other things to do.

Now this morning. I worked bathrooms and trash. Trash went ok, I changed a lot of the bags becsuse I prefer to do it regardless and it was just normal overall. Then bathrooms. The bathroom cart is a mess. Which started my mood. The top is all unorganized and theres dirty water in the mop bucket. When I went go get new water, I had set the mop off to the side assuming it had already veen run out and dried because it had been in the part of the bucket where you ring it out and it had been there since yesterday morning. I finished filling the bucket and then look over and notice the puddle forming under the mop because my assumption had been wrong and worse, it smelled like pee. ! Carring on The first two bathrooms were ok, not great but fine. Then I got to the main breakroom and noticed itd clearly been cleaned, Sam worked the day shift Saturday so I assume he swept and mopped. I also swept and mopped. Then, the small break room. Sam didnt clean this one. Which is fair on his part because I think throughout the whole day at least one or more people are sitting in it with no time for someone to clean. So I start and its just the whole thing, even the bathroom floor, was so bad. Aside from the floor the bathroom part was ok, but the floor really didnt seem to have been swept. And the main floor absolutely hadnt been swept. This was obvious from the start but it kept making me madder and madder as I swept and saw how much trash was on the floor. It absolutely put me behind because I wanted to get as much as I could. The cutomer bathrooms also looked pretty bad which is had to tell who thats on, but wheb I got to them it was apparent somethibg else I hadnt fully thought of as a problem until then. Behind all the toilets, like on then but behidb the seat part, there was so much DUST. I had noticed before in the other bathrooms but didnt really think about it because of things plus i see the dust more often collect in the orher bathrooms than that one for some reason and I didnt even realize this but because it was something New in the costumer bathroom it was really noticeable now. Which made ne even madder. Its not hard to clean, were supposed to be cleaning the toilet seats anyways so getting just behind them isnt anything!

And its just so aggrivating. The longer at work i was this morning the more it pissed me off. Especially because in addition to what I was seeing, the things I had heard from others over the last couple of weeks started piling on.

With my own eyes i had seen how bad the cart had been and from sam I heard that the water in the bucket had been in there all week, he suspected that he wasnt changing it. He also commented on the rags all over the cart thinking that he wasnt using paper towels to clean and instead used the rags. I heard about how a couple of times now hed forgotten or ignore the front trash cans and some others. I heard from someone in the meat room that when he cleans it he doesnt do that grear a job and even broke a couple small things. Which is all very concerning to hear since thats a fucking sanitation issue!? And I heard from nick yesterday that he thinks that the lead isnt cleaning all thw bathrooms every day and is instead only cleaning them when they look dirty. Which I'm a bit inclinded to believe because the underside of some of the seats seemed much dirtier than id expected.

And its all infuriating! The Boss is the one who showed him all the jobs, none of us showed him any of what we do it was all the Boss. So like, did HE tell the lead not to do this or that? To do some of it to save time? I dont know but some of it is common sense regardless of what hes beeb told hes still fucking it up and hes our fucking boss. And the main one doing everything!

The store hasnt looked as clean from the start of this new contract and now it's even worse and its awful!

And I dont have a way to end this rant it got really long snd feels like it needs a good closer but I dont have one...

[tumblunni]

Fuckinghell i got to That Part in USUM and it was even worse than i expected

Kfuckinh fuck i alreadyhated lusamine cos i hadan abusivemum like that in real life but this time i wanted to fucking stab her actual eyes out with my thumbs! How can a bad writing flub trigger such a huge ass panic attack in me!! Am i really that pathetic!! God im just sitting with my face in a fan cos im overheated as fuck i was all fight or flight mode just about hitting the A button and knowing the next scene i get will be Somehow Lusamine Was Right, in the place of the execellent callout scene lillie got in the original. So much actual detailed analysis of child abuse and now NOPE ITS OKAYMOMMY HURT U FOR A GOOD CAUSE

And what i hate so much is that they didmt even completely rewrite it! This isnt even an 'alternate universe story' where lusamine was a good mom, which would already be problematic in context but at least there'd be an excuse for it. Nah instead they just left in all the foreshadowing leading up to her being abusive and all the scenes of her being a fucl but just at the last second its ok cos something something necrozma.

Things that are still canon in this universe:

lillie and gladion ran away from their mother and nearly died on the streets and all that

Lusamine still controlled how much they acted and looked and etc that lillie has anxiety over picking her own damn clothes in a shop (and gladion mentions the same in an optional dialogue that also wasnt removed)

"Oh no its a big reveal that aether foundation is evil and working with team skull and they kidnapped lillie and now u have to fight thru an entire foundation full of evil murderous adults and also faba the fuckmeister supreme"

Lusamine wants to murder cosmog to open an ultra wormhole and laughs about it

Lusamine has an entire fuckin secret room full of pokemon corpses preserved in ice so they'll 'stay beautiful and never disobey'

Lusamine tells her kids theyre disgusting for disobeying her and she doesnt love them and never did and also they are selfish cunts for daring to want to be not abused

Then she fuckin attacks them, and you fight

Fuckin ALL THEY CHANGED was that at the end shes like 'but i do it cos necrozma bad and i was really save world'. And the writers seem to think that this somehow justifies her actions rather than just making her an equally evil equally abusive person who just has a dumb knight templar reason for why she thinks she's in the right. Like maybe you could say this would make her more redeemable in the end, i guess?? Like if she actually had a proper redemption plotline you could use this as a springboard to jump off in order to create that plotline. That she was once good and her evilness is a very specific sort of 'murder and hate is justified because my purpose is so important' kind of thing, which should honestly have led to her personality being entirely different and written entirely different. But you still actually have to write a redemption route! Shes not just suddenly good because she has a motive for being evil! And shes not even as redeemable as the other villain bosses, if we only hear about her 'good reason' AFTER we see her do everything evil! And her evil is so much more personal than the other bosses! Like maxie and archie were still likeable eveb before their VERY EXTENSIVE AND WELL WRITTEN redemption plot, because their evil plot was abstract and nonsensical ('destroy world') rather than actual detailed real life crimes to characters we care about. Abd very manipulative and deliberate ones! Maxie and Archie had it established very early on that they THOUGHT what they weredoing would improve the worls even if it was obvious they would actually destroy it. Lusamine didnt abuse her kids accidentally or because of a mistake, the only way she thought she was doing the right thing is that she thought her kids were ungrateful evil fucks who deserved being hurt because they MERELY WOULDNT OBEY HER EVERY WHIM! And we see this from the perspective of the kids who are very much just goddamn innocent kids and very much show actual realistic ptsd symptoms and relateable stories of abuse. So yeah lusamine already starts at a higher tier of villainy that would require more redemption than archie and maxie, even if you can technically say 'maybe her plan to beat necrozma via pet murder and child abuse might actually work'. (Or, in the origonal, that technically her plan was just to fuck off to another dimension of obedient mindless slave jellyfish and never come back, which is technically less wprld damaging than the hoenn guys.)

And just MANNNN what i really hate is that they didnt remove anything except like.. The parts where you sympathise with the kids. I feel like the scene of lillie at the clothes shop early on and the dramatic break in to aether paradise were just left in out of laziness more than anything. Like theres a lot of stuff that seems 'oh we have to do that cos thats how it went last time, but lets half ass it and rewrite the dialogue shorter and rush to my New Bits'. I feel like if someone played this first before sun and moon then half of the plot wouldnt make sense! But why did they choose to leave in just enough that it made lusamine still look like a monster, if she never gets her comeuppance!!!

And man i really fucking hate how they rewrote lillie and gladion during the big plot swrrve into LUSMINE HAD GUD REASONS 2 DO THE THING. Lillie says barely anything and gladion is suddenly all 'please stop because I CANT LOSEYOU ASWELL AS DAD, MOM' not fuckin please stop because you are murdering nebby and you just told me you dont love me. Andthen hebegs her to take him with her to fight necrozma becauseits type null's destiny to be a beast killer?? When just five seconds ago hehad unchanged dialogue about how he saved type null becauze he saw it was born and raised to be what its 'parent' wanted it to be, just like how lusamine abusively raised him. Like fuckin entire story about him escaping to be himself and give this lil frankendog a chance at a real normal life, just WHOOOSH right over the new writer's head...

And then THE FUCKIN WORST BIT is that they kept the same scene of lillie sleeping in lusamine's bed but changed all the dialogue to just 'i'll sleep here' *scene ends* rather than 'i remember when i used to sleep in her bed after nightmares when i was like five and thats the last time i can remember that it felt like she actually loved us, i need to sleep here again to say goodbye and steel myself to fight to save the world next time we see her'

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha nuance what is that complexity who is she never heard of her

Fuck that scene was so relateable cos thats literally what i did the day before i ran away from home.fuck you for removing it.

Fuck this game really is like a weirdass rom hack some other guy did of a game he didnt understand. It at least makes me feel better to know it was directed by a different team and isnt considered the 'final full version' like platinum and emerald and stuff. I felt practically gaslit when i was tryong to reconcile the idea someone could write a complex analysis of child abuse and then unwrite it as if it was never important. Was it never really intended to be abuse at all and i was just imagining it?? But nah no its just someone else handling the expansion pack for a game and turning it into an 'alternative story' with his different lame motiveless Bad Legendary villain cos somehow he didnt think the original was good enough. Fuck, it was the most emotional most terrifying villain boss of all time, fuckin geez what is wrong with you!

GUZMAAAA WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOUUU

oh yeh did i mention that also Still Exists but the npc thats implied to be his abusive dad has his dialogue slightly rewritten to be 'my kid ran away on a pikemon journey and beat me' not 'i beat my kid but he beat me back'

God fuck u fuck this fuck EVERYTHING what goddamn motives do you have for removing a goddamn How To Spot Child Abuse manual for kids in game form. THIS ENTIRE PLOT WAS SO IMPORTANT IF I SAW THIS AS A KID I WOULDNT HAVE TRIED TO KILL MYSELF

gahhhahahahhhhh

[obannthepunished]

uhhhhhh notes HURT WEEK im pains

"They call me eagle-eye fjord where i come from." "maybe raven. i dont know." that theory about Fjord being the Hawker is suspicious rn (Apparently theres a third i missed whoops) sam apparently similar thoughts maybe bc Nott brings it up

Jester finally teaching kiri basic phrases, like "go fuck yourself"

Beau + Fjord taking first watch

Caleb checking out the dodecahedron

(Unrelated odd point: i have a current dislike/distrust for liam, which is bullshit bc... i love liam. and caleb and vax. but apparently smt is wrong.)

Dodecahedron is Very Old, and has been shaped/polished Cay uses the haversack as a pillow

BEAU/FJORD Beau: "I think I messed up. I think I should apologise." I HURT? Oh beauregard. oh marisha. "i wanna try, I guess" F: I think he deserves that. He's been good to us. i regret not writing fic now 8(

"OOH, terrible" "YEP." "five" "five" (collective "ooh")

Nott + Jes second. they roll not great.

Tinkle tinkle "nnhnohfishnott"

Kiri is poofed up asleep aAW

trident goin for FRUMPKIN NOOO (pause whilst they look for range on dismissal)

Kiri wakes up "Go fuck yourself :("

Theyre waiting for fish head they could just reappear Frumpkin tho...

Jester is sacred flaming, Molly has a sword active + stabs, Caleb fire bolt, Nott fires an arrow, Fjord eldritch blast, Yasha stabby

Molly + Nott + Caleb miss Fjord hits, Beau hits, Yasha hits dunno bout jes

frumpkin poofs back but doesn't see anything else.

???? alarm lasts 8 hours, not until triggered yall it should still be up. they need to look up the spells smh

Nott messaging to tell yash to hide the bodies

LAst watch is Yash and Caleb i need to stop shortening names

Caleb asks Yasha for people advice :') He's writing it down... i love him Yashas advice is basically "Fucking Bathe" And cay confirms he keeps himself gross because people ignore him more that way 8( Baby

C: "Do you know what i miss? shaving." Y: "I could shave you right now with my sword. I've done it before, you know, to... not have hair on my arms-" Omg shes doing it omg theyre doing it omg I DONT HAVE TO DRAW FACIAL HAIR IN MY FANART ANY MORE FUCK <3333

cay forgets he has a dagger jesus fucking christ

i love everyone making comments + taliesins just amazed like, borderline heart eye emoji look at this whole scenario

M: (to Caleb) "Well done, she [yasha] likes you!"

Nott is Not Happy About Water N: I'LL STAY WITH KIRI everyone else: Convincing her to come N: I'll stay with kiri, and if there's any trouble... we'll see what happens

Fjord goes first, he sees, with his 60ft darkvision, architeture of room. mistly natural, some bits not.

Fjord botches his stealth roll but matt botches his perception even worse. and my thing crashed im so mad.

Fjord is Not a good swimmer. hes like. 30ft swimming speed. Things being left: Caleb's books (2) Molly's coat

travis willingham going "kiris gotta die" then dragging everyone who gasped through the dirt

beau gets fucking 37 on her stealth check Matt: "That's some vax numbers right there!"

The visual aid is... so extra. lights. smoke. what the fuck matthew. (note: when ur best friend is called matthew this is a phrase you say too much)

Surprise round for erryone but Molly and Yasha (purrsonally, i think they were too busy talking abt how beautiful cay is now ;3c)

everyone rolled shite for initiative tho

Caleb casting haste on molly O:

Fjord is very very adept at everything

everyone on crit role can do maths better than me 8(

the marrow fuck beau and fjord royally

watching call lightning forming + marishas face as she slowly realises :)

jes gets the first hdywtdt + crushes a fish with a lollipop

Caleb is taking blind potshots with the glove of blasting boyy. One even hits!

moll gets 3 attacks i love my beautiful devil child

N: Are you guys alive and do you need anything? you can reply to this message~ C: FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK N: oh,, alright.

Taliesin's relief when ashley actually hits is very good.

Beau goes down! D:

hi unrelated taliesin sticking his tongue out at sam fills me with indescribable joy

NEW: Horny twink gets double penetrated by feisty wet ones.

... which is to say two fish dudes stab molly.

Jes heals Beau, but we all know fine fucking well if she hadn't, Yasha would have done it on her next turn. still might since she's only on 11

Cay using dispel magic O:

Molly gets the second hdywtdt "I'm literally just a windmill at this point"

FJORD gets the third F: "I see Molly loojin' around, give him a little wink-" (murders) M: Fucking arsehole F: (witty comment) PEACE OUT (blinks out again)

"Sevens are scary" - Taliesin

Yash gets the next hdywtdt Xorhasian Neck Tie Jesus christ

I was right tho Yasha was seriously considering healing beau, it just takes her action

Two more fishfucks 8(

More call lightning

Sams flask says "lost my best friend over a bowl" and that hurtie

caleb is boutta die. Yasha is boutta die first lmao oh no. i love taliesin jaffe an inhuman amount. Yash gets pulled OVER beau and marisha makes like grabby hand motions which is VERY cute

ok NOW caleb boutta die. he Shield's, and then fragments "Caleb will remember this"

Beau looks at Yasha, looks at Caleb, and goes to CALEB (sobs) blasts a ki point and everything

Molly gets a nat 20 oh he's such a babe

Nott spending her turn justifying herself to Kiri

Fjord blinks back in and fucks up ANOTHER fishfuck

Yasha casting healing hands on HERSELF good.

"You dont have a printout of your character sheet????" "Oh yeah I do after you asked me nine times" liam wh

both yash and caleb are at ONE hp

B, spening her last ki point: HEYCALEBWESHOULDTALKLATER

Beau gets the HDYWTDT tho

Molly is Very Sick from losing haste

Caleb goes the fuck down Fails his first save

everytime tal says "im gonna try something weird"  i heart eyes emoji shame he cant do jack fuck though

Nott Burning Bolt shoots the fishfuck for 24 damage jeeeeez doesnt die but drops lightning

Fjord: (appears, fails, disappears)

if Caleb permadeaths i WILL cry

PLEASE YASHA PLEASE GOD JESTER PLEASE THEY KILL IT IM CRYING SO HARD no like literally i am actually crying bc matt very deliberately did that so that he didnt kill Caleb

Jester uses her pearl of power to regain a slot, and use it to cast prayer of healing for SHIT rolls.

Jester goes back to Kiri <333 baby. baby bird.

Matt mercer keeps using words ive only ever seen written and im ALWAYS ???? about their pronunciation

Fjord finds some L00t Like boxes and longswords and a pool of water with dozens of metallic objects mostly outlawed diety symols. changebringer moonweaver. others i forgot. stormlord. everlight. asmodeus ooh, bane strife emperor. and tiamat.

"a little black bird that's fluttering to try and get dry" fuck thats so damn cute. Marisha has the :D face

Calebs books are dry

wooden box + pool are magic. like. WITHIN.

Enchantment in the box. Molly collecting the moonweaver pieces

JESTER FINDS TWO SYMBOLS FOR THE TRAVELLER? HOLY SHIT Different make, pure silver one, burnished bronze another door arch with the road

Molly gets 12-13 symbols

Nott mage hands just so good even drunk

in the box is a blade, gold, jewel encrusted Molly shoves Nott aside to get it cause its a scimitar style

Caleb finds the arch-heart symbol? Takes one

Yasha takes 4 symbols for the storm god.

Bane/strife emperor symbol Fjord is curious about chained coffin he throws it into the pool. nothing happens.

JEster goes to pll it out and gets a big catseye yellow gem,  magical, but not a school of arcane magic. it has a line groove in it, very deliberate, an oval.

"something about that [orb] is very familiar"??? (Matt to Travis)

i was right about the orb being familiar

C: (abt the gold sword) This blade is called Summer's Dance C: "Mr. Mollymauk," M: "Mr. Caleb."

Blade allows user to cast Blink basically, and is stronk

official-europa replied to your post: uhhhhhh notes HURT WEEK im pains “They...

i think its probably misty step and not blink 

official-europa replied to your post: uhhhhhh notes HURT WEEK im pains “They...

on the sword i mean

caleb tries to ID the orb

fjord touches it "sky is moonlit + cloudless, clothes not your own, nor body, overcoat + human skin. thick calloused skin. left hand stone. look down, see body of previous owner, dead in blood. natural landmass seawater night. flash. right hand grasps falchion. voice booms. potential. jams the stone into gut, cCONSUME. vanishes into belly. looks into water. REWARD." "Vandrin."

i dont kn ow what the fuck is going on.??? everyone else sees this o shit

oh shit is the eye the symbol of Fjord's patron?

"he was my mentor, a captain of mine. a man named Vandrin." Y: What happened to Vandrin? F: I'm not sure. he captained the ship i worked on for many years, and their was an incident. an explosion, terrible weather, waves, "i was knocked overboard" when f woke up he was back on shore

"how did you survive" "I'm not entirely sure."

explosion was sabotage.

the pool is saltwater.

Molly shoves Fjord's head into the water

comes up "You okay???" "Do it again" "Tap three times when you're done!" Fjord drowns

they take as much as possible up and out and decide to dynamite everything in. dramatic exit..

They take the bodies down and lay them in the swamp to rest and decompose.

Beau tries to pull Caleb aside and he just stonewalls her until she actually apologises.

Caleb "I give beauregard a hug and say 'idont know what im doing. just. go with it." BEau very AWKWARDLY hugs him back Beau consulting Fjord, Caleb consulting Yasha The entire other side of the table clapping.

Beau: UH. GOOD TALK. FRIEND. (awkward silence) Beau: Seriously though. Friend? (pause) Caleb: Uh. Ja. (brb dying)

there is a single yellow eye on the hilt of the falchion.

episode END

[notailtheories]

NotailsAndMore Tweet Compilation 2

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This section will contain the tweets that I consider make up Act 2. Because they are not actually from O-1, you could also consider them an intermission... But they still hold important information either way. OwO

This batch of tweets began a little over an hour after the last round stopped... Which isn’t a very long pause. You can most easily tell the difference because this person’s face is “TvT” rather than “=)”, if you’re looking to track these from the Twitter itself... OwO

98 |

I passed out and I wake up to me being logged into this creepy ass notail fact account. Fuck off who did this? TvT

Reply to 8, & 99 |

hate to be a stickler for details but you didn't say a fact just a question tho i *would* like to know some notail facts about my dark past :D

Holy fuck. Look if you know me O-2 sir I just want you to know I did not make this account or tweeped at you, I just woke up to this. Who tweeps shit like this at an O-class? TvT

100, reply, & 102, reply, 108, reply, & 112 |

X-7364 if this was you and some of your shitty experiments I WILL strangle all of your dirty rats. These O classes could order my death for no reason. You even used my actual email to do this. They could figure out who I am! TvT

Your buddy even said "fuck you" to me. Now that guy's got some real claws. >:3 

I am so sorry O-6 sir. I had nothing to do with this but I will still apologize. Please forgive me, I'm ok if you don't forgive my friend and kill him though. TvT

Grovelling ain't pretty, you know. But hey, you ain't done anything, right? Maybe I'll let you go. >:3

You would be most kind if you let me go for words that were not my own. Thank you. TvT

I'll think about it. >:3

Thank you. That is all I ask, and all I am allowed to ask. TvT

Reply to 98, 101, reply, 109, reply, 113, reply, 114, reply, & 115, reply, 118, reply, 119, reply, 120, reply, 122, reply, 124, reply, 125, reply, & 126 |

lol u rly had me worried there sweetie :3 im still curious abt this whole thing if u want 2 help me find out abt it :3

I didn't write any of this! This has to be an X class prank. "Ha Ha, make your friend pass out, make an account with their email and possibly kill them by telling O-6 that you love them. So funny!" TvT

lmao u creeped out like every single o class tho i think thats kinda an achievement u should be proud of urself :3 whoever made this account was saying some really spooky stuff tho do u think it was just creepypasta or what :3

Please don't say I did it. I had nothing to do with this. I wouldn't contact the O classes, much less say such things to them, for they are most favorable to my survival. It was just some shitty prank. Some of the reactions are, strange, but that is no matter to me. TvT

watching u suck up 2 them is rly funny lol but kk babe i guess ill drop it :3 smh i thought this was something cool :3

I rather not relate "something cool" with angering the O classes but I understand. TvT

suckuuuuuuuup :3

I rather live a suck up than die for something I didn't do. TvT

how abt i give u smth else 2 suck on hot stuff :3

Look I don't even have a tweeper and I'm about to abandon this account and never touch it again. So my response to that is "um bye." TvT

i hate 2 see u leave but i love 2 watch u go :3

That's extremely holy and not ok. TvT

i hope ur not as disappointing in bed as ur friends failed arg was on tweeper :3

How could a notail raise so high to grace? TvT

u sure raise some things of mine baby :3

I would block you but I'm not going to be related to this account anymore, and if my friend logs back in I'm ok with him getting fucked over by your words. TvT

id prefer 4 u 2 to get fucked by me :3

Courtship between notails is not ok, but I suppose you know that. Just understand that "no." TvT

lol our society sux anyway i dont think its possible to pollute our gene pool more than its already fucked up babe :3

Ok well society gives me a roof over my head, food, and the time I got bit by a mallon I was experimenting on society fixed my arm before it rotted away. So we'll have to agree to disagree. TvT

lmao :3 the more u talk the more stupid and boring u seem :3

Says the notail who keeps going after clearly making me uncomfortable. But "sigh" I guess that's most people. TvT

ppl are funniest when theyre uncomfortable :3

Typical notail. You fit in just nicely. TvT

Original, 103, reply, & 105 |

@NotailsAndMore is it time for my 13 other facts?

Look it up yourself? Go read the Cosmosdex or something. I may be a K class but I'm not some fact machine. TvT

The what

Can you not look up basic and common terms? Geez look. http://cosmosdex.com/cosmosdex/ TvT

104, reply, & 107 |

X-7364 just walked in with coffee and called me a sleepy head. Said I passed out after intensely working on typing. Said I wouldn't respond to me when he had a question. He's lying, he knows he went overboard this time. TvT

You may want to improve your security. This could have ended very badly for you. :V

I will do what you recommended O-7 sir as you are most wise as all O classes are. I do have good security, I must have passed out so fast my computer didn't lock so my roommate and coworker decided to fuck with me. TvT

106, reply, 111, reply, & 117 |

I just checked the profile page to see if I could find some evidence of who did this. "i'm not sorry i told the truth when you didn't. no one deserves lies." The hell. If this is over lying about who ate the last pizza I'm going to be pissed. TvT

This went better for you than it could have mate, but I would recommend keeping closer guard over your belongings. Some of the other O-classes seem a bit agitated right now. uvu

Fully understood O-5, who kicks clockworks across the skies. I'll attempt to not pass out at my computer with my roommate around. TvT

The epithets aren't necessary mate. But maybe give your roommate a kick so they don't pull this again for good measure. uvu

I will make sure to give him a kick no matter how much he says he had nothing to do with this. Thank you for the advice O class. TvT

Original, & 110 |

@NotailsAndMore Once you figure out who did this, send me their ID number. Immediately. unu

I....think it's my roommate X-7364, but he's swearing the whole time this was going on I was working and refused to respond. I don't believe him but he sounds so serious about this. TvT

Reply to other party, & 116 |

Is there any way I can convince it to become a solid Yes? c:<

(Note: I won’t record this whole exchange because I don’t think it’s relevant... The context is O-8 is looking for who made this account. That’s all. OwO)

I know this is rude of me, and feel free to confirm this, but will you spare my roommate? He seems so honest in his pleads that he didn't do it.... He's the only one who could have done it, so it's him, but it seems like he regrets it deeply now. TvT

Original, 121, reply, 123, reply, & 127 |

I really am impressed by how many people they managed to unsettle in, what, an hour? uvu

Honestly as an X class he is naturally unsettling but I've never seen him act this badly. I wonder if I really ticked him off with the pizza thing. TvT

I've dealt with much worse than some X class...if it was just that then whatever...what does your friend know....OwO

I wish he would just admit it already. He said a few really odd things on this account and I have no idea where he's getting it from. Just. Fucking admit it X! Why is he being so rude to O classes you guys could KILL or BANISH us. TvT

It feels like something stranger is going on...OwO

It's just a stupid prank. A stupid prank that's now getting us basically evicted cause we can't stay here anymore. Stupid, stupid, prank. TvT

128, & 129 |

Ok this account is done. My roommate likely made this account as a laugh and somehow got the attention of the O classes. I'm sorry this happened even though I had nothing to do with it. I wish I could say my friend was sorry too but he's pissed off. TvT

Logging out, and never logging back in again. Yet again. Sorry for all the problems this account caused. Just unfollow this account. Bye. TvT

[ THIS ACCOUNT IS DEAD | Shitty prank by shitty roommate/friend who refuses to admit it | Will never be logging in ever again ]

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