#theyve got the gist theyve lived the gist

[rearranging-deck-chairs]

mostly i want yaz to hit 14 because i think having the noble-temple family walk into the kitchen where hes trying to stop his nose from bleeding next to yaz standing there like a little sentient thunder cloud and having him jump in front of her in defense before anyone can say anything like "it's not her fault!" is just a really endearing image

[assassinhomecreedstuck]

i cant believe ive played world of warcraft for 20 years

[sillyandquiteawkward]

sillys (not so) lil info dump about how to be a human being. smiles

htbahb is an album from glass animals, of which notably, all the songs align with different people's lives, perspectives, and feelings, also of which are shown on the (various) album covers. so the easiest way to go thru the story is song by song. but i will show you the album art so you can get a gist of things before we go into details.

these are just some of the various album covers for htbahb, theres a bunch of them, but we dont need to see all of them to see the different lives of our characters.

1, Life Itself

this is our main character for life itself. you can call him a bit of a nerd if youd like. apparently his name is chuck rogers. they dont all have names.

hes an inventor, loves ray guns and strange technology, but as noted in his song, feels like he was raised with expectations hell never be able to achieve. his father as a child said he would be a superstar, but nowadays, he cant get a job and he lives with his mom. hes struggling with finding himself and his place in society and hes doing drugs and feeling like hes absolute rock bottom with everyone being against him. he feels alone and attacked and retreats back into his car or grandmothers basement and keeps folding back into himself.

in the music video for life itself, hes only seen in a few scenes, leading the charge against [popular st] with a smoke bomb as [mamas gun] watches knowingly from the sidelines as perhaps the real leader behind the assault. they seems to be accomplices with each other, as they ride in the car together and seem to be specifically looking for [youth].

2. Youth

now the main character for youth is tricky, it seems like we have two characters for youth, the small child, and assumedly, his mother the waitress. i think i like the interpretation that the mother is the main character for this song, and the child represents the album as a whole. alternatively i also like the idea that the child is youth, and his mother represents [premade sandwiches]. but for the most part, they are just both the characters for youth.

youth is a mother talking about her child, and to her child, almost in a detached sort of way as if they arent able to see each other. a mother speaking her hopes and dreams to her child. somehow these two have been separated when the child was young, perhaps through giving up to adoption, or hinted in the music video, abduction. she wishes best for the child, urges them to feel their mother at their side, and notes that theyve got her eyes. she lists off her wishes for them to be happy and have friends, and be silly. this perhaps is for the best, that they can be happy even without her. i particularly like in this song, the wordplay makes it sound like the singer is counting one, two, three, four, five, when they are singing other words like boy, to, free, funny, and fly respectively.

in the music video for youth, the child is seen almost haunting the mother as she works as a waiter, appearing in several locations playing and running around as she remains dutiful to her job. they briefly sit looking at each other in the same hotel room he had been taken to in life itself's music video.

3. Season 2 Episode 3

this is the main character for season 2 ep 3 and i think one of the cool changes between album covers, as we see a fully done up girl all put together with her make up on, and in the other, someone a bit more silly with her makeup removed. this might be the way she sees herself vs how other people see her.

the song is the lament of a boyfriend to his girlfriend, who seems to be glued to the couch, watching shows, getting high, not changing her clothes, and eating day old leftover food and most notably, mayonnaise straight from the jar. at the beginning of the song, the two of them are high together, however he soon sobers and realizes she refuses to get sober along with him. he tries to convince her that their relationship wont work if she keeps being like this and doesnt try, but she wants him back the way he was (high as well) and views him as a nag. she still makes him happy, but sometimes she makes him sad to see how she lives. even after an acceptance from the boyfriend that she wont change and will never be vertical and golden like he wants and that the relationship will never work out, the song ends hinting that hes picked up getting high with her again due to her calling him a killjoy and wearing him down.

in the music video we watch the girl splay out on the sofa, surrounded by her mess watching tv and doing nothing. halfway into the video, we are brought into the game she plays, as she battles [life itself] [cane shuga] and [the other side of paradise], all of which are men who could possibly be the boyfriend figure.

4. Pork Soda

this is our main character for everyones favorite pork soda. hes an older man, who for the most part seems pretty happy. wonder if hes harboring some long lost feelings or something.

the song opens with a street performance unintelligible to a normal listener, its like passing by a conversation, you are only able to hear bits and pieces of the spoken words. once the song starts you hear a story about this guy's girl who used to be fun and adventurous and would take him along with her. in the same breathe hes begging to go back to the days they were happy together. it seems like they fell out of love, or are in a struggling relationship bereft of communication or the passion it once had. shes only happy when theyre having sex together, and just looking at each other causes him heartache. the song talks about pineapples in my head, and being brain dead, as well as other references to diminishing mental facilities, that perhaps in their age, theyd forgotten about each other.

the music video gives us probably the most clear story line, as we see the wife prepare a meal before sending it through a dumbwaiter into the basement for the husband. there he sits alone, watching tv. up above the wife plays with their dog, imagining the dog is the younger version of her husband. all of her time is dedicated to the dog, and all of his time is dedicated to the tv. they have forgotten they love each other and live in the same house, but live in separate worlds. only after the dog destroys his tv and the husband destroys the floor above him and under her feet, do they finally get back together as he catches her as she falls, surprised and exhilarated for the first time in forever. and things seem to be better as they finally occupy the same room together again.

5. Mama's Gun

This is the main character for mamas gun. shes a victim of the perception of her mental illness. i think this is my fav song of the album.

during the song, the woman initially admits that she took her gun and made her husband go to neverland. however she also says she loved him a lot and he was perfect. through bits and pieces of the lyrics you can come to the conclusion that she has some sort of psychosis, or perhaps schizophrenia in particular as she notes many different voices and figures talking to her. the song references dr swango, a doctor who killed his patients, however he insists to her that him and all the other voices in her head are too from neverland, and that she was a murderer just like him. is she really guilty of murder? what really happened? the flute played during various instrumental parts of the song is a sample from the carpenter's mr. guder, a song about a man who does what hes supposed to in society and his job and gets nothing from it. karen carpenter herself was a victim of her own mental illness and they say that theres a specific purpose for the sample chosen. once the lyrics pick back up, the voices again pipe up and tell her she was a murderer, even the voice who had never spoken says so, so he must be telling the truth right? during the final bit of the song, it seems like her husbands voice joins into her collection of voices, as he bears a cheshire smile and asks her to lay with him once again, and that hes waiting for her. in the end, its unclear what happened with her and her husband, as she goes back and forth saying she was violent, she was doing nothing. this song was inspired by a story they heard of a woman going into a drug induced black out for a month and reappearing in another state with no memory, and the lingering fear that shes done something terrible wrong, and never being able to have the closure of knowing what happened.

theres no music video for this song, but we see her appear in life itself. she and [life itself] drive to the hotel where [poplar st] is holding [youth] captive and attempt to break into the room hes in.

6. Cane Shuga

this is our main character for cane shuga. hes exactly how he seems, a rich white guy who is, of course, using that cane shuga all day everyday.

cane shuga presents a dialogue from two parties, two people in a relationship. the singer promises he wont do coke anymore, that he wont be a john doe in the hospital. the chorus however is the high he rides on, where he thinks hes hot shit, hes 007 james bond, hes as powerful as kim jong, with a popped collar as he looks into the glare of the mirror and hypes himself up after using in the bathroom at work. hes untouchable. the second chorus is his partner, giving up on him, their love has burned up, just like his drugs. theres a humorous line of putting their foot down saying ive had quite enough, but corrects themself and sarcastically says or lack there of, that they arent being given anything anymore by him. regardless, their verses and conversation is short. the chorus of his high is the main focus of the song, and repeat over and over as the days continue.

[cane shuga] appears in season 2 ep 3's music video as [season 2 episode 3]'s potential lover. their stories do seem to entangle, they both are drug users dealing with partners who want to stop using. some people say that he is her partner, that he stops using for her, but falls back into the habit. however this doesnt exactly line up with her song, as she doesnt want him to stop. i think its part of that unreliable narrator theme weve seen in previous songs. people have different experiences with each other and get different messages due to the issue of communication. im not exactly on board with these two being together, but i do understand where people are coming from with this take.

7. [Premade Sandwiches]

this is a spoken word interlude, sped up and pitched down. there doesnt seem to be a character paired with this song, and on cd this song is simply a bonus track hidden behind cane shuga. on first listening its very difficult to catch what is being said, but over and over the speaker is talking about standing in line for various things. this song discusses mindless over consumption of drugs, of buzz words, of natural foods for your dog, watches, new clothes made to look old, the junk drawer filled with phones you dont use, with pens that dont work, with random shit you never needed just piling up. people stand in line and they dont even know why.

8. The Other Side Of Paradise

this is our main character for the other side. hes gonna be a basketball player and make it big babyeee.

so its a bit unclear and vague in the lyrics, but it seems our narrator and the basketball player used to be close friends. he even seems to be in love with the basketball player, calling him my love. but the basketball player leaves their home in new orleans to go chase his dreams out west and make it big, leaving our narrator's side. he told the narrator not to worry but after phone calls, it seems like basketball boy got a girlfriend. hes gloating to the narrator, hes got a girlfriend now, hes got a gold camaro, hes made it big, meanwhile our narrator is at the payphone hearing all this and his world turns in slow motion. no longer is the basketball player his baby blue anymore. hes moved on, hell never have another chance to love his friend. hes so angry and hurt, but he balls up his fist almost in a fight or flight reaction, and settles for the ghost of his love. hed always hoped for a paradise where they could be together but it seems like fate had other plans. he laments the basketball player for ditching them, saying here in new orleans people dont leave and ditch their lady (him). he wants to be loved and pampered by him, not her. heres where the vagueness comes back, the narrator seems to be so distraught that he rather kills himself, or finds that his body looks wrong, perhaps that hes not a girl that couldve been loved by the basketball player.

he only ever appears in the music video for season 2 ep 3 as one of the bosses [season 2 episode 3] defeats, claiming ball is life. there is a music video that was recently released for this song, however it does not depict the basketball player.

9. Take a Slice

this is our main character for take a slice, hes a bit of a slut but he makes it work :) the spoken intro to this song is the real recording the band took while talking to a male fortune teller, so the sausage candle is rather real or a lie from the fortune teller.

take a slice regales the story of a young man who finds pleasures in the sultry sexual aspects of life. hes sucking on cigarettes in a way freud would roll in his grave, hes painted his nails dark, has piercings, hes asking for another slice of cherry pie, cherries being a symbol for all things sex and lust. hes smitten with the idea of being a prize to be sought after, and after trying sex work for the first time, realizes this is the job for him. hes going to fuck his way through college, and sleep during class dreaming of you. wink. hes rolling in the dough, hes got a gold car, hes maybe dabbling in drugs too, and hes filthy and he loves it.

10. Poplar St

ms moore is the main character of poplar st, and shes a cougar, and not the good kind.

a young boy lives a typical suburban life. hes got bandaids on his knees and hes climbing trees. but one day, he sees mrs moore and mr keats have sex. immediately this drags him out of his childhood, hes such a man now that he knows what sex is. this is the first step of her grasp around him. as he gets a bit older, his mother calls her prosti-tits and looks down upon her. but the boy looks up to ms moore, despite his mothers words. mrs moore sees his desperation and pulls him into her clutches. theres a very specific voice crack when her teeth sink in deep and the note hes singing falls flat. this bit of pain expressed is highly contrasted with the chorus coming back in, the boy once again considers himself a real man, a true romantic, this is what all men dream of, isnt it? but there are dead flowers in the sand, hinting that these roses arent just romantic. the next bridge plays and interesting word switch up. it starts out with her begging him for more as she sits in her underwear, and then switches to him begging her for more in his underwear. theyve both wasted their days, but when it comes to his youth and her age, the only one wasting their childhood is him. the song concludes with mrs moore calling him up collect (so he has to pay for the phone call, not her) one day and breaking up with him. and then it all gets pulled out from under him and hes just a boy again. this tells the sad tale of how men and boys' sexual assault and grooming often is pushed to the side because they think this is how things are supposed to go, that they are supposed to have sex and to be used and abused from a woman is supposed to be an achievement. but really all it is, is abuse that leaves him feeling terrible.

11. Agnes

this is agnes :) i think it was mentioned at some point that he takes pictures of people when they arent looking, so to me, i like to think hes the one capturing everyone pictured in this album. bear witness to other humans.

the song starts out where the singer is appearing to try and comfort agnes. how did it get this bad, agnes used to just take pills and smoke a little, somethings changed perhaps. the singer notes agnes is just going through the motions every day, numb, and nervous, but hes swelling with emotion all the same. here the singer laments he wants to hold agnes like hes mine. theres a longing sadness in the lyrics. the next verse confirms the worst, while agnes was perhaps a genius when it came to the romantic, he was a deeply depressed and lonely person. he started to rely on the drugs and the alcohol he used to use recreationally, just to live a normal life. and he ultimately commited suicide. the singer wonders where the agnes he used to know went. however the singer reconsiders, and accepts that agnes did his best, life must feel so unbearably long when its soaked in sadness, living a false life filled with depression. so it goes, the singer thinks, but cant help but to feel lost. the only thing he can think of is agnes, perhaps considering all the art agnes made, all the photos he took of other people, perhaps just thinking about his friend in any aspect. grief is funny like that. on the vinyl record, this song's last seconds repeat over and over until you stop the machine from playing, like a lingering memory you cant stop thinking about.

the agnes music video is much different than the others, as it focuses on the singer, dave bayley as he sits in a centrifuge and attempts to sing the song. this causes a very physical reaction and he struggles to even lift his hand, by the end of it hes sweating profusely and unable to catch his breath, but he persists and continues singing. he mentions this was a mere fraction of what someone going through depression could feel like. during the music video as well, he appears to be looking across from a mannequin, perhaps the stand in for himself once hes put himself in agnes' shoes.

thanks for reading if you did i love being insane. all of these are my personal thoughts on the album, and might not exactly match up with your interpretation, but i have tried to keep to what we believe is what glass animals had in mind for the album and these characters.

[zedleaked]

[APPARENTLY PEOPLE HERE WANTED TO KNOW THE HUMAN AXIS LORE SO IM JUST GOING TO COPY MY TWITTER POST HERE…] BASIC GIST IS THAT THIS IS JUST A GENERAL HUMAN AU. MONSTERS AND HUMANS SWAPPED. WOWIE!

ANYWAYS READ MORE FOR AXIS

AXIS ORIGIN IS STILL A BIT FUZZY. HERE HE'S LIKE CHUJIN'S ADOPTED SON [GENDER NEUTRAL],, CATGIRLTRICKSTER ON TWITTER SUGGESTED CHUJIN JUST FINDING YOUNG AXIS IN A PIPE OR SOMETHING AND I THINK THATS REALLY FUNNY... THOUGH HIS ORIGINS WOULD BE VAGUE. IF ASKED HE'D SAY HE DOESN'T REMEMBER.

ALSO NOTE BEFORE I FORGET. AXIS WAS JUST BORN WITH ONE LEG. THERE IS NO LORE REASON TO WHY ITS MISSING, IT IS JUST THE WAY HE IS. CHUJIN MAKES HIM A ROBOTIC LEG SO HE CAN HAVE AN EASIER TIME.

SURE I COULD GIVE A FUCKED REASON AS TO WHY HE DOESNT HAVE IT BUT I DONT FEEL LIKE IT.

AXIS WOULD BE AN APPRENTICE UNDER CHUJIN SIMILAR TO MARTLET [I NEEDA DRAW MARTLET EVENTUALLY] PLUS IN GAME THERE'S FLAVOR TEXT ABOUT HIM FLIPPING THROUGH THE ROYAL GUARD HANDBOOK IN HIS MIND. HONESTLY. MARTLET AND AXIS BEING FRIENDS THROUGH SHARING THE SAME INTEREST IS SILLY...

HE'D WANT TO TRAIN HIMSELF TO BECOME A ROYAL GUARD OR AT LEAST A PROTECTOR TO PAYBACK CHUJIN FOR TAKING HIM IN. HE'S GOING TO PROTECT HIS FATHER AND HUMANKIND. IT'S HIS BIGGEST GOAL IN LIFE.

STEAMWORKS STILL EXISTS. ITS JUST CHUJIN HADNT BUILT THE AXIS MODELS IN THIS AU BECAUSE. YOU KNOW.

MAYBE HE SAW POTENTIAL IN HUMAN AXIS, SEEING HOW DETERMINED HE IS TO GROW STRONGER AND PROTECT PEOPLE. CHUJIN WOULD WANT HIM TO HONE HIS SKILLS TO BECOME SOMETHING... BIG.

IN A WAY. AXIS WAS A PEEK INTO WHAT HUMANS COULD BECOME AND WHAT THAT COULD DO FOR HUMAN SOCIETY UNDERGROUND.

MEANWHILE AXIS IS ENAMORED BY STEAMWORKS AND JUST CHUJIN'S WORK IN GENERAL. HE REALLY ADMIRES ROBOTS, HE THINKS ABOUT WHAT ITS LIKE IF HE HAD ROBOTIC MODIFICATIONS.

AND LESS LORE RELEVANT BUT HE ALSO HAS CONNECTIONS TO KANAKO TOO! THEY ARE THE SIBLINGS EVER. THOUGH IVE BEEN WONDERING HOW CEROBA NOT KNOWING AXIS IN STEAMWORKS WOULD WORK. IT'D BE KINDA WEIRD FOR CHUJIN TO KEEP A WHOLE ASS CHILD SECRET FROM HER.

THEYVE PROBABLY SEEN EACH OTHER AND NEVER HAD MUCH SIGNIFICANT

INTERACTIONS FOR THEM TO FULLY REMEMBER EACH OTHER. AXIS SPENDS A MAJORITY OF HIS TIME AT STEAMWORKS OR DOING ROYAL GUARD SHIT, AND WHEN HES NOT DOING THAT HES PROBABLY PLAYING WITH KANAKO [WHEN CEROBA ISNT AROUND]

AND WELL. WE HAD TO GET TO THIS PART EVENTUALLY. ONE DAY A MONSTER MAKES ITS WAY INTO THE UNDERGROUND AND STARTED KILLING PEOPLE. DALV [WHO I ALSO NEED TO DRAW] GOT CAUGHT UP IN THE FRAY WHILE PLAYING WITH KANAKO [AND AXIS TOO]. UPON SEEING HIS FRIENDS GET HURT. SOMETHING CLICKS.

AXIS HAD TRAINED UP TO THIS POINT. THIS WAS HIS MOMENT. HE HAD TO SAVE THE PEOPLE FROM THE THREAT IN FRONT OF THEM. INSTINCTS KICK IN AND HE GOES IN TO FIGHT THE MONSTER WHILE DALV TAKES KANAKO TO SAFETY.

THIS MONSTER WAS TOUGH. HE WAS ALMOST KILLED. BUT HE HAD TO PERSEVERE.

SOMETHING JUST ACTIVATED IN HIS SOUL.

HE FELT A SURGE OF POWER. THE ONLY THING HE KNEW IN THAT MOMENT WAS TO.

GET. RID. OF. THE. THREAT.

IN FRONT OF HIM WAS JUST. A HEADLESS BODY THAT SLOWLY FADED INTO DUST.

THAT... HE DIDNT MEAN TO GO THAT FAR.

SIMILAR TO CLOVER IN GENOCIDE, AXIS HAD RAPIDLY LEVELED UP AND SHOT A POWERFUL ATTACK AT THE MONSTER IN RESPONSE TO ALMOST DYING. HE NEEDED TO KEEP GOING NO MATTER WHAT.

STILL. THE CONSEQUENCES OF HIS ACTIONS LAID HEAVY ON HIM.

HE HAD KILLED A LIVING, BREATHING THING.

SOON AFTER CHUJIN WALKED IN ON THE SCENE COMPLETELY HORRIFIED. AXIS, ASHAMED OF WHAT HE HAD DONE RAN TOWARD STEAMWORKS TO ISOLATE HIMSELF, SIMILAR TO DALV.

SURE, HE HAD SAVED PEOPLE FROM THAT MONSTER BUT DID HE HAVE TO BE SO GRUESOME?

CHUJIN RAN AFTER HIM, TRYING TO GET HIM BACK

CHUJIN FINDS HIM AT STEAMWORKS, WALLOWING IN JUST. EVERY EMOTION.

HE TRIES TO COMFORT HIM THOUGH AXIS IS STILL INSISTENT ON NOT GOING OUT.

THE TWO REACHED THE COMPROMISE THAT: AXIS WOULD GUARD AND PROTECT STEAMWORKS AND THAT CHUJIN WOULD CHECK UP ON HIM EVERY NOW AND THEN.

SO THATS WHAT HE DID. HE STAYED AT STEAMWORKS, WATCHING OVER THE PLACE AND ITS ROBOTS FOR….. AGES.

EVENTUALLY CHUJIN'S CHECK UPS GET MORE SPARSE UNTIL JUST. NOTHING.

AXIS NOTICES TOO THAT LESS AND LESS SCIENTISTS ARE PRESENT AT STEAMWORKS. UNTIL THERE IS NO ONE THERE.

WHEN ASKED IF HE WAS GOING TO LEAVE

TOO HE SAID

"NO. MY FATHER AND I HAD REACHED THE AGREEMENT THAT I WOULD STAY AND PATROL THIS AREA, AND THAT I WILL DO." THERE WAS NO CONVINCING HIM TO LEAVE. SO THE OTHERS RELUCTANTLY LEFT HIM BE.

DAY BY DAY HE WATCHES STEAMWORKS FLOOD AND DECAY. WHILE HE STAYS THERE TRYING TO KEEP UP THE AGREEMENT BETWEEN HIS FATHER AND HIMSELF.

NO ONE HAD TOLD HIM.

ONE DAY THOUGH HE FINDS THAT STEAMWORKS SUDDENLY ACTIVATES RIGHT BEFORE SEEING A MONSTER ONCE AGAIN.

OH HE REMEMBERS THE PAST WELL. IN THIS AU IT WAS IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO GET HIS MEMORY ERASED.

WHILE THE EVENTS PLAY OUT MOSTLY THE SAME COMPARED TO NORMAL UTY.

AXIS SEEMS MORE HESITANT THAN USUAL. AND PROBABLY MONOLOGUING A LITTLE SIMILAR TO WHAT DALV DOES

BEING A HUMAN. HE POSES LESS OF A THREAT ON HIS OWN. HOWEVER. MY GUY SETS UP HOME ALONE TYPE TRAPS N SHIT TO TRY AND CATCH CLOVER INSTEAD [PART OF HIS ROYAL GUARD TRAINING!!.

ONLY RESORTING TO USING "ROBOTIC MODIFICATIONS" HE HAD FOUND WHEN CLOVER REALLY [ticks] HIM OFF.

AND YES. HE STILL GETS A ROBOT SPOUSE IF A PACIFIST PLAYTHROUGH HAPPENS. HUMAN AXIS IS OBJECTUM. ITS REAL.

SO YEAH THAT IS ALL THE THINGS I THINK.

HOLY SHIT THIS THREAD IS LONG. FEW PEOPLE WILL READ THIS I THINK BUT I STILL WANTED TO GET STUPID AU THOUGHTS OUT. UH. YEAH HOPE THAT IS GOOD OR SMTH.. FEEL FREE TO ASK QUESTIONS 🥺

[spidermanifested]

revisiting the greeds moving castle au post-hmc rewatch here are some new thoughts hmmmmmmm

in my Envisioning. "homunculi" in this world are created when an alchemist (wizard) makes a deal with a demon, gaining the ability to use human souls (hearts) as a power source in exchange for. well. feeding human souls to a demon

for this purpose, souls are gathered from enemy countries via Forever Wars and crystalized into stones which an alchemist can ingest. the military is dedicated to finding the most promising alchemists and grooming them to become homunculi

greed was trained in alchemy by his father from a young age, along with his siblings. their family has immense sway over the royal courts, to the extent that one of his brothers (bradley) wound up marrying into the ruling family. when he came of age his education was handed off to the royal alchemist dante and their relationship did not remain professional very long. he became a homunculus at her encouragement, and then found out he didnt really like the whole "we have to maintain our dominance as alchemists via a lot of murder all the time" thing, and rapidly Howls Moving'd out of that castle

the demon he made a pact with is obviously the dwarf in the flask who im debating making like. okay so what if his father had previously Also made a pact with the same demon.... and then he transferred it to greed.... like ohh he gave up his power and even his life because he ~Saw So Much Potential In His Son~. Except one of the factors leading to greed hitting the bricks is discovering that, no actually, the demon was fully in charge of (the husk of) his father for years, and he just swapped to greed because he wanted a younger swaggier puppet. thatd kind of make a guy rethink his circumstances right

Anyway its pretty similar to calcifer if he leaves his flask he dies, and greed will also die if anything happens to him. greed keeps him very strictly restrained but doesnt tell anybody why he hates this little bongwater bitch so much because hed have to explain hes kind of his dad and itd be awkward

so. we have dante in the role of both suleiman And the witch of the wastes vis a vis being greeds ex, but i think the other part of the witch of the wastes (the "gets more sympathetic as the movie progresses" part) i want to hand to lust, because pulling from her 03 arc she would work very well as someone greed knows whos initially working for the court but gets abandoned and made an example of and then switches sides. also her getting all her power sapped and reverted to her real age would mean Old Lady Lust which would rule

markl is ling (duh) but because i dont think ling would give a shit about a random old guy stumbling into his house, the parts of his character that are initially suspicious of sophie i am going to instead bestow upon. dolcetto, greeds Rescue Dog. aka he was cursed by a witch into the form of a dog and greed was like oh sick a talking dog and dolcetto was too pickupable to escape his fate

martel is also there. talking snake martel. her and dolcetto are there to provide sarcastic banter while bido loses his mind

i initially didnt know how to fit roa in but then i realized i needed a turniphead standin. roa cursed into the form of a cow but he CANT talk and everyone thinks hes just a weird ass magic cow who keeps showing up to help but then the power of friendship turns him human at the end and dolcetto and martel are like okay now how come we cant do that.

i realize ive barely said anything about bido in this post about my au where bido is the main character. but to be fair. i feel like just saying "sophie is bido" gets the entire gist across. humble townsperson with big beautiful brown eyes is transformed against their will into something that makes it impossible to live their life as normal, theyre short with a big nose and wear a long skirt and like to fuck with people now that theyve got nothing to lose, they start working for a weird sexy guy who hates the government wears tight pants and has a shiny black monster form. Is not that complicated

i am now rotating the mental image of lust chuffing back a fat dart on the sofa while immediately outside the window dublith is on fire

[dorotama]

ive been thinking about dorotama a lot in the past couple of days, mostly just trying to put my finger on why i like it so much - subtextually existentially and very headcanon-ish-ly LOL

i think it has a lot to do with the fact that their relationship is essentially a blank slate. they both know very little about each other... kululu and tamama are sort of the outsiders of the platoon in that way- they don't have the same history together like giroro, keroro and dororo do. and if youve known me for long enough you know that curiousity as the driving force of a relationship is my lifeblood.

there's also that weird aura of Sarge Obsession that permeates their lives... tamama's relationship with sarge is pretty much equal and opposite to dororo's - tamama's in love with him, looks up to him, and considers him a great friend while also knowing that he's a horrible person - it's a definite love-hate relationship that culminates in frustration and affection as well as this omnipresent delusion... like he convinces himself that sarge is this fearless badass strategic genius that his ego tells him he is, while knowing that he's anything but.

dororo also knows that sarge is a huge dickhead- he was on the receiving end of his awful behavior for pretty much his entire childhood, and has very little respect for him - but he still thinks of him like a friend, hoping and praying and believing deep down that he has at least a smidgen of good in him - the part of dororo that convinced himself that sarge was his best friend, in spite of everything, is still nested deep in his psyche. he can't bring himself to throw away his love... everything theyve been through, the good and the bad, the little bits of joy and love that he has brought and the detriment that he's wrought... hes got a lot of cognitive dissonance going on that reminds me a lot of afforementioned tamama dissonance. basically the Shadow of Sarge is hanging over their relationship in a big way LOL

i also really like how theyre both big on hand-to-hand melee style combat. i feel like they both have a lot they could learn from each other... i think it'd be cute if they trained together. tamama could teach dororo how to do a Depression Beam attack LOL

it also works on many levels if you're evil. if dororo were to get closer to tamama and eventually develop a crush on him it would psychologically obliterate him on like 5 different levels to see tamama so blatantly crushing on sarge. gushing about how awesome he is while also agreeing with dororo that he's horrible. spying on sarge's room from the ceiling and seeing them happy together... without him.... his heart would explode. but at the same time he's not emotionally stable or sane enough to just drop in and try to play with them... he would much rather be a ceiling person. and god forbid he ever tell tamama how he feels......

im gonna give it some more thought but this is basically the gist of it. i literally feel dizzy from rarepair fumes right now

[dateamonster]

what’s powering this whole Angel/demon system? Are humans a part of it? Is god harvesting humans for sin and regret?

tbh i prefer to leave the more like blatantly theological aspects a lil ambiguous for funsies and to leave things open to interpretation but the gist is that, regardless of what the objective Truth may be, angels are beings who believe themselves to be the messengers, architects, and when necessary, soldiers of capital g god.

but new orders havent been coming in for a looong time, so angels, being sort of singleminded beings by nature, have just sort of been retreading the same ground over and over since bible times. studying the scripture, spreading messages of love and light, polishing up the ol holy swords in preparation for the day they are called to use them at last, etc etc etccc. its like if you combined a nun with a doomsday prepper. theres also the matter of the angel hierarchy that dictates who exactly does what to keep celestial society running on like an internal level but thats the basic vibe.

angels mostly exist within the celestial realm but they have outposts in the mortal realm as well (because demons started setting up shop there and they didnt want to be shown up). while angels are only supposed to go to earth for business purposes, theres not always a whole lot of oversight on their activities and in modern times there are plenty who are just kinda. living normal lives amongst humankind.

and in the other corner, demons. contrary to common belief, they are not all or even mostly fallen angels. theyre their own thing, occupants of the infernal realm and dealers in human misery and avarice. back in ye olde days it was just you know every once in a while one of these funney little guys with pop in the mortal realm to fuck with humans or trick them into selling their soul for a piddling bit of magic or whatever, but over time they industrialized and now hell is a massive sprawling enterprise with a highly competitive and highly confusing economic system and no clear idea who is at the top.

its an mlm. its just literally a really big slightly more evil than normal mlm scheme.

angels and demons have had beef from the very beginning, not least of all because team infernal keeps bringing those angels who cant stay the path over to their side, but also just about every non-infernal beastie in existence thinks devils are kind of a bunch of little yuppie shits. actually, neither side is particularly well liked by the rest of creature-kind come to think of it.

btw shouldve mentioned earlier but humanity in this world is like. vaguely aware of the paranormal and such. angels are more of a rarity because one of the many many rules they abide by forbids them from doing anything that could bring harm to humans (gods specialest little guys) which over time, following several Incidents, has been expanded to mean "dont reveal yourself to humans or ideally even interact with them unless absolutely necessary", meanwhile demons whole deal kind of requires direct interaction. they might keep the horns under wraps until theyve got your signature for obvious reasons, but at this point everyones got a cousins best friends uncle who did some shady shit at a crossroads and came back with a crazy story and a blurry photo of some cloven hooves or smth.

tldr god is not rly a factor here. demons deal in mortal souls for power and promotions back in hell and angels intervene wherever they can. otherwise everyones just kinda doing their own thing. its more in line with like the pop culture tradition of angels and demons as fantasy creatures of a kind more than anything specifically religious, though i think its sort of impossible and tbh kind of boring to try and avoid all the source mythology.

anyway this whole post is barely legible sry lol ill try and make a more coherent lore post on this someday

[destinysbounty]

Oh yeah no im definitely not done talking about Lloyd and Zane's dynamic in my elemental roulette au. Heres some more brainrot for the road

The basic gist of this au is that instead of fire, earth, ice, and lightning, the elements of creation are fire, earth, water, and air. So now the starting ninja lineup consists of Kai, Cole, Nya, and Morro. Of course, Jay and Zane do eventually join the team as well, and they are still elemental masters, but their trajectories are a teensy bit different. For instance, Jay starts out as Samurai X

In the original canon, Wu recruited Zane while in the process of tracking down masters of the core elements of creation. But in this au, ice isnt an element of creation, which means Wu has no reason to seek him out. This means Zane stays homeless, which means he and Lloyd end up homeless at the same time

So yeah Zane and Lloyd cross paths and bond over their shared circumstance, then decide to stick together

Zane has amnesia, he doesnt know who he is or where he came from and ultimately doesnt have much direction in life, but finally finds a sense of purpose in looking after Lloyd. So he decides to kinda just follow around this weird feral child he found

Lloyd tries to maintain a strictly professional villain-henchman relationship at first, but quickly grows very fond of his new buddy and a strange connection fosters between them

So now youve got Lloyd, a chaotic 10-year-old who is determined to steal candy, take over the world, and be a general punk/emo nuisance...and then theres his supposed henchman, a chronically confused amnesiac robot who bakes cookies in his spare time

Lloyd is his usual edgy, black-cape-wearing self whose main objective is to steal candy, and Zane is...well, hes confused, but hes got the spirit

"Yes, Lloyd, of course you can steal candy, but make sure to steal some vegetables too! Youre a growing boy, after all :)"

In this au, Zane doesnt remember his real name (for a number of reasons i wont bother you with). So Lloyd naturally takes it upon himself to give him one. It ends up being a kind of Jason Funderberker situation, where Lloyd comes up with new names for Zane pretty much on a daily basis, but all the names have the vibe of a 10-year-old boy naming his first hamster. So the ninja are like, "hey wait a minute, i thought your henchman's name was Carl???" And Lloyd just goes, "uh yeah, but that was *yesterday*. Today his name is Burgermeister 3000. Times change. Keep up, losers."

Jay: dont you hate having this kid call you a different horrible name every single day?

Zane: i didnt used to have any name at all. Now i have 50. This is an improvement

Id like to think Lloyd gets very disappointed when he discovers that his friend's name is Zane of all things. He thinks its a dumb name, and only begrudgingly uses it bc he knows how important this is to Zane

The falcon still leads them to the Bounty, but at this point only Lloyd and Zane are living there so now theyve got a super cool Evil LairTM. Also the falcon lives with them as their funky robot pet, and its all rather wholesome in a bizarre, unhinged sort of way

There are a lot of possibilities for how and why Lloyd releases the Serpentine in this au, and I havent made any conclusive decisions yet, but one of my favorites is this:

Zane: what the one thing i told you not to do while i was out running errands? Lloyd: release the serpentine

Zane: and what did you do??

Lloyd: ...release the serpentine...

I wont go into a lot of detail about the Serpentine and whatnot since a lot of it is still undecided, but for now i just really like the concept of kid!Lloyd and Zane getting up to shenanigans. Also, while we're here - when Lloyd confronts the Ice Emperor in ns11, he tries to snap him out of the Scroll's control by reminding him of all the adventures they shared together back when it was just the two of them. Someone hold me while i weep

[actualbird]

0/////0 do u have any spicy marius thoughts? the more luke or luke AND mc involved the better.... the thought of this threesome grabbed me by the balls and simply will not let go. do u see marius actually being interested in luke, or just bitter and in denial abt him being so likeable?

[n/s//f///w text in answer]

hello anon!!! ive actually been thinking about marius/mc/luke ever since i wrote “instructions unclear...” but i have a...very convoluted and long winded vision of how it would actually happen

if u want the gist: marius in love with mc -> marius/luke FWB -> luke/mc -> marius heartbroken over BOTH OF THEM -> communication happens -> marius/mc/luke happy ending

if u want the Full Story and are willing to bear with me for a bit, i imagine it like this:

despite being the youngest of the NXX gang, marius has fucked before. he's fucked a bunch, actually. it's fun and he's good at it so for a while he treats sex like the rest of his hobbies, but the thing is that That's All Sex Is To Him. by the time he's 21, he's got a good number of casual one night stands in his pocket, but deep down, he....kinda wants more than a quick roll around in the sheets. he wants to not have to slip out of their bed before they wake up, he wants to make breakfast for them when they wake up, he wants something more than the song Temporary Bliss by The Cab.

and then he meets mc and for the first time in his life, he's in love.

he's never been in love before so he kinda sucks at expressing sincerity, resorting to making himself look like a massive tool most of the time, but mc, god bless her, still likes him in spite of that. in marius' heart, a deep and fragile yearning he has no idea how to show and, well. marius isnt used to not being good at things. marius doesnt like not being good at things.

enter luke pearce.

to answer your question, anon, i do think marius in this scenario would be interested in him, but for a period of time, that interest is muddled by bitter jealousy. because come on, luke pearce, who is made of fucking sunshine and rainbows and is a super spy and is mc's childhood best friend, like, how the hell is marius supposed to go against that? marius hates luke! he hates him! //insert entirety of "instructions unclear..." to express the point im getting here but moving on from that like

marius does eventually, begrudgingly, come to terms with the fact that he's attracted to luke, but that actually makes his feelings situation worse because he can (at least on a superficial level) see that luke has got even MORE GOING IN HIS FAVOR.

//distressed marius noises

but here comes the kicker. one day, luke approaches marius, and huh, he's nervous, he's fidgeting with his key, he's---

luke: can you have sex me?

marius: WHAT

---HE'S PROPOSITIONING HIM????

luke then goes to explain, quite embarrassed, that he has no sexual experience whatsoever---which comes as a shock to marius, what with how luke looks like how he Looks Like---and that he wants to learn how to do things. luke doesnt have many friends (vyn scares him, artem is a virgin too, and aaron, just, no, oh god, no) and marius asks "okayyyy, why not mc?" and luke blushes and goes "she's...kind of who i want to be good for..."

marius, at this point, is feeling a lot of emotions. on one hand, theres a very very hot man asking for a fuck. on the other, this man wants the said fuck to be better when he gets with the woman marius is in love with. the logical thing to do would be to reject luke, because duh, but marius...marius doesnt like not being good at things. for a while now, he's had to deal with being bad at love, but now, there's an opportunity to show his competition that he's got advantage in this arena?

needless to say, marius says yes. and thus begins marius/luke Friends With Benefits funtime.

marius is very smug, every time he and luke have sex. he cant help that rush of power he feels when he one ups luke, when he takes luke's cock down his throat, when he hears luke's punched out moans. he loves seeing luke out of his element, whining and flushed and destroyed. they have a LOT of sex, in this point of the story, all under the flimsy guise of "teaching luke". marius talks luke through how to kiss, how to touch, how to fuck.

"you need to up your stamina," marius says, getting down on his knees. "lesson for today is don't come for as long as you can, got it, super spy?"

"got i----oh my fucking god, Marius!"

the tables turn eventually though because luke pearce is a fast learner, and soon enough, marius isnt in control all of the time anymore. luke pushes back, luke uses his knowledge of marius' body against him, luke makes marius see fucking stars.

this would have been all well and good, marius is used to casual sex afterall, but luke pearce, as we've established earlier, is nice. he's nice. he doesn't let marius leave his bed in the middle of the night because he's cuddling marius like a squid the entire time. he always makes breakfast for marius before he leaves in the morning because over the course of the FWB thing luke learned marius' tendency to skip meals out of corporate induced stress. luke always holds marius, holds him as if he's something worth more than his dick and what it can do, and marius realizes, day by day, that he has made a terrible mistake.

marius is bad at love. and he just had to go and fall in love with luke pearce too.

//makes vague hand gestures because im starting to run out of steam so i'll speed this bit up. plot happens here where luke and marius stop doing the FWB thing because marius feels the need to distance himself. luke is hurt, but accepts, and then somehow luke gets with mc which causes an Angst Bonanza for marius because he's heartbroken as hell over the BOTH OF THEM. somehow somebody realizes theyve all been idiots and the three of them have a conversation where they actually communicate, and then they all get together and live happily ever after.

and have awesome threesomes, yes, but i didnt realize this answer got this long and now im too tired to describe the threesome kJBKSJBKFGSD

anon, i would like to apologize to you, because you asked some very simple questions and i gave you this trainwreck of an answer that's....holy fuck, 1000+ WORDS LONG?? IM SO SORRY

but also, anon, how dare you for this. now that ive written all of this out, i am possessed by a need to make it a full fic. how could you do this to me. 

[nuclearnerves]

INCOMING VAMPIRE AU THOUGHTS

Don't mind me I'm finally getting the ideas I had on this shit out so I can actually go forward with developing it as an AU. It's my usual mixup of fps protags, Gordon Guy and John, but I'm starting with Gordon as the Vampire and Guy as the Vampire Hunter.

absolute beast of a wall of text under the cut

What If Being A Vampire Literally Sucks All The Time Forever like chronic pain sucks. like THAT level of sucks. Like Here's what I was thinking of. Being a vampire isn't just "being alive forever but you need to drink human blood" It's like Oh man I have some lore you look at vampires and their main thing is that they're blood suckers right so lets start with a corpse dead body. cadaver. no longer with us. just some rotting meat. The brain needs oxygen as fuel. The blood supplies the oxygen through blood. The blood is pumped through the heart. The blood is made by your bone marrow. You die. Your heart stops beating Blood stops pumping Brain no longer has oxygen to think marrow stops making blood thats standard! Now, becoming undead, as a vampire, is a little more complicated. The long and short of it is: your body is FIGHTING ACTIVELY to be alive against all odds and wins every time (immortality), but it hurts the whole way

I have the gist of it. It's like. Your heart stops. By all means, you should be dead. but the magic kicks in, and you're still thinking. Your brain is still sending signals to your muscles to move. But using what oxygen to move? whats burning in you? You don't know but you know it's just enough to get to your next meal. So you ferociously eat something, and then find you can't swallow. You can't make saliva. You barely have the energy to chew, and once you DO get something in your stomach, it immediately comes back up. Why can't you feel your pulse? What's going on? You're out of options so you figure you might as well just lie down and die. You're too tired to keep going anyway. So you do, you lie down, and you close your eyes, and you quietly hope that death is as peaceful as sleep. You realize you've actually been moving around without breathing, which makes sense because you can barely flex your diaphragm for more than a shaky wheeze. How are you thinking with such little oxygen? But as you fade from consciousness, you can feel something in you, and it's so upset, it's crying, it's filled with grief, and you instantly can tell it's your skeleton. It's your bones. You're distraught down to your marrow. You're dying. You're dying! Your heart stopped and you have no more blood! You need blood! You need blood to move! To breathe! To think! You try to breath deep again for the voices in your bones, trying to comfort them, to sooth them with the repetitive motion in your lungs, trying to fill yourself with anything but grief, but they keep wailing. We make the blood, our creation, our child, what we put all of our work into is gone! gone! gone! We need it back! Anything! All of it! Find it! Bring it back to us! We're hungry! WE'RE HUNGRY!

and once you find yourself too exhausted to listen, to think, how badly you wish just to die already to cease hearing this wailing, you find your body moving without you. And it's hungry and it's searching and it's crawling on all fours and it misses its beautiful red life that made it feel so full before and it needs it back, and the next thing you know you're desperately grabbing anything with blood in it and shoving it in your mouth in a desperate attempt to sooth this cry for life, you don't want to die, you don't want to die, you worked so hard to keep up this body and craft it and LIVE with it and you're not going to go, and even when you try, even when you try to lay down and die, your body refuses, it takes the reigns, and it keeps up the work itself with or without your help. And it's not until your stomach is full and your teeth are stained and you feel a pulsating burning in your bones that you snap back awake, completely conscious, just fine. You're lucid, you don't feel any more pain. Everything around you is dead and drained and messy and your heart still isn't beating. but you can breathe now and holy shit you guess you literally need to kill to survive and the less you eat and the more you starve yourself the worse it gets when your body finally decides to take recourse.

my idea was like. "the vampires curse is actually stored in the bones, thats why the teeth get so sharp and also theres a connection between blood and bones with the creation via bone marrow" its literally like i was sitting there thinking "no no no, whats it like to be a vampire. what neurosis would you develop. How would you panic? What are common mistakes beginner vampires make" which, by the way, gordon is a beginner vampire

so now you gotta factor, what blood lasts for how long? how long can you go between meals? not only that, but what creatures satisfy the urge? How long can you go avoiding human blood? Does it work like drugs where you develop a resistance to the high, or is it like food where it will keep you moving until you eat again? How the fuck are you gonna get your hands on blood? Can you just eat raw meat? Does that count? and thats where im at lol

OKAY now. now thoughts on beginning scenes of vampire au

So my idea was this Doomguy is a vampire hunter independent and one of his buds says that some freak scared and almost attacked his daughter when she got too close to his old abandoned laboratory up the hill and hes like “he might be… you know… a problem. if you needed a lead” and guys like yeah i fuckin hate the undead ill kill this dude so he busts into old lab space and sees so many dead animals its actually mostly Bones and pelt that hes seeing piles of feathers etc so hes like yeah this is all telltale signs of vampire uhhh hes introduced to gordon SOMEHOW im not totally sure of the details but the working idea i have is guy falls into a trap gordon devised that restrains him suspended in wire or something and gordon like. limps/stumbles into the room and this dude looks haggard he’s breathing heavy, his cheeks are hollow, he’s bug-eyed and shaking while looking at this massive wall of meat in his trap and he bares a bunch of hideous teeth and grits them and looks like hes really struggling with somethin... Like if these dudes don't know each other then Gordon might give in and try to drain Guy, and Guy would absolutely do anything in his power to turn this new vampire into ash, im thinking the inclusion if g-man as a coven leader can fix both issues.

i like the idea of guy falling into gordons trap and gordon thinking about what to do with him before gman shows up and whisks gordon away for a “meeting” while complimenting him on his good work catching the most feared vampire hunter in the country and gman just leaving guy suspended in wires that he has to fight his way out of. Instant situation defuser.

Guy ends up needing to take care of other monsters before going back to Gordon, and he DOES plan to go back to gordon, because no vampire is a good one, especially not one associated with the fucking head of a coven, but next time he sees Gordon, Gordon helps him out of a scrape by attacking and draining a combine who was going to take Guy out or something and escaping before Guy can catch him, or otherwise seeing Gordon do something good with his insane undead powers and like, the third time he meets up with him is when they can actually talk, and Gordons fuckin SO haggard, he’s not even fighting back and he’s even going as far as to say “just make sure theres nothing of me left when you’re done, I don’t want anyone else getting hurt”

Side Note: Guy has a bunch of scarring on his body from dealing with vampires, cops, ghosts, werewolves, anything violent that kills people. I'm playing with the inkling of an idea that he has Divine Blood in him, so that any time something undead bites him or tries to drink his blood, it burns. We'll see.

Side Note 2: now i really like the idea of the combine actually being an organized faction of vampire hunters that are WICKED crooked and exploit people for all their worth in exchange for their “safety” when they kill a vampire They’re essentially loansharks and Guy fucking hates them and hates the name theyve given to vampire hunting

Side Note 3: You've probably noticed that I haven't said anything about John yet! He's in this too. His species is a surprise but I need to get to him later I have an idea for where he came from (Cortana too)

I still need a good reason for Guy to not instantly kill this vampire, if not it's just gonna be "Gordon Freeman escapes the countrys best vampire hunter like a seventh time" every time they meet and they end up being rivals. And it gives Guy enough time to look past the whole "undead monster" thing and start looking at the "Oh this dude figured out how to fight his ridiculous craving for blood in a way more humane than most and is actually staying out of peoples way and keeping to himself. Guess he's not that big of a threat but I still need to keep an eye on him in case he loses it. Turns out he's got a family (Probably Alyx, Eli, Issac and Barney) who's been lookin for him and cares about him as well, don't wanna hurt them". I like the idea of them ending up needing to team up to take out undead together.

And that's what I got so far!!!

[presidentpoppy]

I love your OC Poppy!!! Can you tell us more about them??

:,D THANK U SO MUCH!!!!! & ofc ofc!!! the basic gist is that they live on a rogue planet called popukonia which is inhabited by a colony of nonbinary clones and so one day the enterprise-d discovers the planet and makes first contact with them even though they’re all human clones like 18-20 y/o but they’ve never seen anyone but themselves so it’s an interesting first contact but basically they stay for a few days to learn enough abt the planet and then when they’re about to go one of the clones runs up to riker and asks them if he can take them with him and taken like,, literally anywhere else so they can see what’s outside this planet so he lets them on and they stay on the ent-d for a while until they can rendezvous with someone who can take them to earth. they study at starfleet academy and basically fall down on some metal n bust their head so they get their prosthetic and become a cyborg!! and so by the time theyve graduated starfleet theyre put back on the ent-d and reuinte with riker and its very sweet and nice and they serve there as a biologist for a matter of years until they hear of miles and worf being transferred to ds9 n theyre so deadly curious about it that they request the transfer too but they keep in touch with will and basically yea thats the very simplified lore of poppy :D sorry thats so long ;^; theyve got a lot of lore lmaooo

[licoricecrypt]

Pls introduce me and rant about ur ocs they all look so cool and I wanna know anything about them

(im gonna try my best to make this as readable as possible)

AHHHH OK SO i have a main storyline with my main characters that ive been working on since like 2015ish (yeah i was in like 6th grade theyve changed a lot) and im not gonna give away to to much just bc i plan to make it into an animated series or comic series.

fun fact: the main 5 characters in this story are all based off of characters that me and my best friends made and basically RPed as in elementary school jdjdjdfdjd

so the world these characters live in is the zombie apocalypse but thats not really the main conflict? more of just a main motivation(trying to cure everyone) the main conflict is emotional trauma woohoo and also some villains and stuff 

another important detail about the world is the gods/goddesses theres the underlands(basically what would be their hell) and the abovegrounds(basically what people imagine heaven to be) and that they arent immortal and must pass down their powers via a child (could be theirs or could just be some random kiddo they yanked off the earth)

so uhh this is my main girl katie(shes mostly called just kat) 

(this is the ref i use when i commission art of her super professional i know)  shes basically the leader type character. shes pretty closed off with her traumas and tries not to get super attached to anyone due to the last time she got attached to anyone they all died :) big fun. shes pretty quick to get snappy with someone and has fairly low tolerance for messing around and get mad at herself when she finds that shes enjoying something. 

some major points in her backstory:

grew up around her scientist father

when the apocalypse started she found a group of survivors that called themselves the metalheads(both bc they listened to a lot of metal and because they all had different metal attachments to themselves, hints where kat got the ears)

after a zombie ambush every dies and kat is now alone

(since i dont have any recent refs of the others im just gonna refer back to this post ) ---- then we got daisy(first one to the left) shes the bubbly, happy, always tries to see the best in things type. (im big mad that i cant publicly talk about her backstory since its SUPER spoilery and literally one of the main arcs) 

she also has like ice/snow powers(shes like...elsa) 

while her happy personality is one of her biggest strengths its also one of her flaws, she tries so hard to be happy she doesnt like to deal with her problems and pushes them aside for as long as possible

since the age of about 7 she grew up alone, learning how to be by herself and surviving fairly well until she meets kat not long after the zombie breakout 

----

next imma talk about nate (first to the right)

one of his main struggles is dysphoria(hes trans) and dealing with hiding this fact from his teammates, not knowing how they’ll react 

nate has like planty/naturey powers

hes fairly standard with his personality, caring, gets nervous easily, tries to be as brave as possible. one of his main contributions is his smarts and how he can help everyone out of difficult situations 

the biggest thing about nate is that his mother is literally mother nature, one of the main goddesses of this world, nate doesnt want to fill that responsibility and runs away to earth 

-----

next is inferno(second to the left) 

(this character uses both they/them and she/her so imma switch a lot)

inferno is the strong and caring type, they always want the best for everyone and tries her best to solve everyones problems while ignoring her own. theyre almost like the mother of the group? taking care of everyone and telling them “go to bed or ill beat your ass” when she catches nate working on something at 2am. 

cant say to much about their backstory since it’s part of her main development arc but she is working towards being a goddess 

----

and last of the main 5 theres aiden(second to the right) 

hes the straight big brother, hes the first to learn that nate is trans and instantly super hella supportive, he hangs out with nate even more and theyre easily the closest 2 characters on the team 

aiden uses like *whats the word for it im drawing a blank* like he can lift things with his mind (kinda like the force from starwars) due to these metal rings attached near his shoulders 

as for where he got these rings(stares at the camera like im on the office) spoilery backstory 

----

so then theres match(the orange haired one) and scissors, (the two on the top sides) 

theyre robots build and given life by lilac(demon in the center) and these two dont have to much value story wise because theyre kinda comedic relief for a while before they just go off and do their own thing

---

lilac is one of the characters that i have SO MUCH backstory for but cannot talk about it because of how spoilery it is(which im big mad bc ive spent so much time on her) 

but shes basically the main villain of the first seasonish shes cruel and only cares about getting the main cast out of her way so she can obsorb their powers(she wasnt just born a powerful demon she stole pretty much all her powers) 

----

theres a few characters and arcs still in development for now, (wanna make about 3 seasons? first 2 are pretty much done with development and story but season 2 arcs are likely gonna stay hidden) but uhh thats the main gist of my main characters! sorry for the long post sjfdsofjaf

[rezby]

reminiscions, so to speak

I’ve been thinkin about this for a while, but havent really sat down to try to formulate this. But a lot of people whom I knew as teenagers or early 20s, when I was a teenager. There are sooo many people who are now (publically) trans, or at least not-cis, that I remember from back in jr high or high school, before anybody had really figured out The Genders. It makes me really glad, to see how many people are self-actualizing. I love to see the updates in their lives that they post on fb, at least the ones who haven’t defriended me. (This enjoyment is only a little vicarious, truth be told. It is mostly genuine happiness for them).

I know its very likely that I’ll never reconnect with any of the people with whom i’ve grown distant (not through any fault of their own. it really is 90% circumstances (everybody moving across the country, to either like boston or ... seattle? portland? Big Oregon City, or for those who are still local just issues of me not having a lot of free time with which to hang out with them) and 10% my hell brain self-sabotaging relationships/avoiding everything), but I often think about them and how they’re doing.

One of the people I’ve mentioned hasn’t defriended me on FB, and I still interact with their posts every now and then - I think a lot about the time when I was 16 and said some really horrific things to them without realizing just what I was saying. I’ve been feeling terrible about it, but I know I’ll never actually send them the apology I want to send - they deserve better than to be reminded of it out of the blue.

At one point last October, I was on this other person’s FB wall, i dont even remember why. sometime in like january or Dec, I saw a comment on somebody else’s status by somebody with the same last name as this person, with similar viewpoints. I click around, and figure out that this person has defriended me, and also publically came out on fb as trans. Last week I saw a photo posted of them with their sign at the chicago trans liberation march (which obvs I didnt go to, i’m not Out and I dont intend to be, until the time of my choosing, so i dont interact publically with Trans (tm) things. i’m fb friends with both my parents), and they looked really happy. Not about the occasion, but as a person, it looked like they had let an awful amount of weight off their shoulders. I remember them being as deeply unhappy as many of us  were, back in high school (a lot of us were deeply depressed. It just turns out for a few of us that the depression was tied to the Genders so getting stuff done for the one helped the other). So, I’m glad that theyve realized their gender and are happier for it. I also wonder (a lot) if thats why they defriended me - I’m not really out on fb, and since I haven’t spoken to this person in years they probs wouldn’t even know that I’m also non cis, so maybe they defriended me when they did their official fb transition stuff. I get it, it would make sense to, but... it still wounds me, a bit.

those two were a couple years older than me and I was never that close to ‘em in high school. this third person was in my grade and a couple classes with me, and.... I was a horrible person to them. Not intentionally, I’ve always had the best of intentions, but that doesn’t mean the actions i had done weren’t horribly misogynistic or racist. A few things I didn’t even realize until years later, what I actually had been doing. They defriended me a couple years back. They’re non-cis as well, but I dont know anything more specific than that.

That was the Complicated Feelings w/r/t the non-cis folk i knew in high school. I had some online friends whove also come to realize their own genders as well, who I’ve also grown apart form. This one was largely due to MSN messenger no longer being a thing, and then me getting busy with irl stuff and basically never being online anymore. I don’t really got any Complicated Feelings for most of this group, its mostly that I miss them but realize there’s p much no feasible way to get back into regular comms with them, and I’ve accepted that.

There was one person, who knew they were trans all the way back when I first met them. But they never talked about it with me. At least 85% of our conversations were political. At the time, I was in early high school, where I was a libertarian at the time. They were staunchly communist, I figure marxist is probs the best term for their beliefs but I’ll be honest, I know jack diddly squat about the academic details of the different schools of communist thought. Anyways, we chatted a lot on MSN back when that was around. At one point I started FB friending the other online friends I’ve got, but this person never actually accepted the friend request. its still in their inbox. I last talked to them about 3 or 4 years ago, I believe in my 2nd year of college. I asked why they hadnt accepted the friend request and they said somethin to the tune of ‘im an asshole lol’. this persons typing style is completely different from that but thats the effect my memory has of that message. Our conversation at the time also turned political. Now, after getting to college and having my eyes opened at, well, a lot of stuff, i’ve since become fairly leftist. probably communist? socialist? idk. Anyways, at the time, I was pretty caught up in the politics of one tumblr user Moneycat. If you weren’t around for that, the gist of it (as i recall) was that... actually, i honestly can’t recall the minutae or which parts werent very good. there are other posts going around from some years back that go over her politics and the flaws thereof. one of their ideas was that gender is a social class, inasmuch as bourgeoisie or proletariat are, and that trans women are a distinct social class from cis women and men. I had recently read one of her posts about how gender theorizing had led her to become a communist, and how the two were inextricably linked, and tbh she was this huge popular rly smart trans lady blogger so i p much hero worshiped her and adopted as many of her politics as i could understand. So I tried explaining this gender theory of communism to my old communist pal, and they were very displeased by it. I did a poor job, to be sure, but they disagreed staunchly. I dont remember the other details of what I was arguing but I do remember it was more out there than just what i’ve typed so far. Cuz I opened the conversation with “hey did you know that i’ve also become a communist now?” or somethin like that, and they were like ‘oh nice, how did you come to this conclusion?” and I went into moneycat’s gender communism and they did not agree. And that was our last conversation. and idk how to start conversations. Even tho we’re not fb friends, i can still IM them via fb, so the option is always open, but I never do it. I miss this person a lot, and its been hurting me for years that they never accepted the friend request. we actually had been decently close online (as far as I recall. i have poor memory at best in general, and there’s a good chance I actually have brain trauma that’s making my memory even worse but that appointment is in may). and they’re fb friends with all our mutual online friends. so its just me. i’m not good enoguh.

And I know if I actually ever made a snapchat I could probably easily get back in contact with literally everybody ever, I know for a fact that all but the last person have snapchats, and I’m p sure that they’d all be receptive to at least messages over it, but.... I tried making a snapchat once, and was immedietely conflicted. Do I go with my IRL name and snap with my family and classmates and colleagues? If I do that, I dont want to have my snapchat available online here cuz I want to maintain at least a veneer of separation between my online identity and my “family” “professional” identity.  Or do I go with my online name, but then refuse to snap w/ like my mom and sis? I ended up deleting the app and never doing anything with it. so I basically refuse to have a snapchat, and p much only have fb these days, which... is not the best method of communication.

Compounding this is my awkwardness with people i’ve known for a while - my memory really does get atrocious about some things, to the point where i’ve hung out with people for years before actually knowing 100% their name. this is deeply embarassing for me, and I dont wanna hurt em, so I dont let on that I dont remember their names. especially if i’ve known them for forever, but havent had a ton of meaningful interactions with them, theres a v good chance i’ll know them, i’ll recognize them, but i wont be able to drum up their name from the depths of my mind. this is awkward. so i sometimes avoid going to places where there are people who might fit this bill. some people from high school who I kinda knew and hung out in the same friend group as me, and a lot of my not immediate (step)relatives. so at the photos for the trans march, where I saw the photo of the one person from 2nd bullet point, I also saw a lot of other people from high school who I’d be awkward around. altho this reminds me, there was a 4th person actually, from high school as well. i think... they blocked me? i dot remember. i know they werent on fb a lot, but they were fb friends with me. i just went through my own friend list as well as that of 2 people who i thought would be mutuals with them but... i dont see them. I’m p sure i recall seeing like,,,, last year or 1.5 years ago that they had changed their fb name from their birth name to a feminine name, as well as changed their gender and all that other stuff that comes with coming Out? but I dont recall and I cant find em anymore. if they have blocked me.... oh well. nothin i can do about it. about any of it really. nothing that i’m going to do anyways.