#they're not all winners I'll tell ya what

[housederiva]

your commentary today is spot on and very much appreciated

That's very sweet of you, I just say every thought that pops into my head

[quitealotofsodapop]

Diet peach soup would probably have the celestials and Marshalls get involved a lot sooner. Overpowered babies are not a good idea to leave unsupervised. As for Macaque, the lady bone demon is most likely going to just shove him onto the thrall, as his problem. Either to be raised as her soldier, or as a potential backup vessel.

Prev.

Yeeeaah the Stalwarts have to get involved sooner than later since their king is now in his terrible twos (again). They present themselves to Pigsy and Tang as village elders who want to help them in raising the boys, and introducing them to their culture. Pigsy was eh on the idea, but Tang was uber excited! Monkey demon culture lessons!

Peaches and MK honestly thought that the Stalwarts were their grandparents for a long time, especially since they didn't know Papa Tang's side of family and assumed he was a just patchy-furred monkey. XD

Nezha, checking in on Wukong: "Why do I sense two baby stone monkeys- WHAT THE SCALLOP!?"

Peaches still gets his school bestie in the form of "Nez", albeit from an earlier age. Nezha can risk a mini-god running around without a voice of reason. Moksa tags in on his younger bro's behalf + as a kindness to Guanyin, as a "cool older kid" watching out for the little monkeys. The -Zha brothers want to keep Sun Wukong's condition as much as a secret as possible from the rest of the Celestial Realm.

Erlang takes one third-eye-look at the situation and goes "Ah crap, I'm gonna have to be their mentor." Cue an Athena and Telemachus dynamic developing between Erlang and the boys once they lift the Staff. But for now, he's Babysitter Jian - the only kid Pigsy and Tang have ever seen feed, wash, and entertain the little monkeys without so much as a grumble. (Jian, shrugs: "I have little cousins.")

Even the Peach Maidens who attended the Orchard with Wukong long ago ensure that he and his little brother are well-watched - glamouring themselves as a gaggle of old ladies in their favourite park. Always ready to pinch cheeks, give fresh fruit treats, and tell the boys how big they're getting!

The Thrall is currently reforming his body after Wukong slapped him across the country for stealing the Stone Egg (aka unhatched MK) + forcing him to drink some nasty potion (Meng Po's soup), so he's not much help in raising de-aged macaques rn.

Macaque accidentally dodges LBD by being a slippery little guy! Falls and crawls through so many shadows that its hard to keep track of him from the Underworld. Lives rough on the street for some time before ending up in the hands of someone who would truly care about him.

Sandy: "Aww. You're an odd little kitten aren't ya?" De-Aged!Macaque: (*spitting and hissing at the giant with all his might, violently protecting the cat food he found. Is barely the size of a football*) Sandy, gently picks up cub: "Hey hey... I used to be an angry little guy too. I learned that when a lot of people are upset, they're really just scared about something that hard to explain." De-Aged!Macaque: (*angry grumbles as he's picked up! Presses ears against fish man's chest to drown out the sound of the city*) Sandy: "Are your ears at you, little buddy? I can see why. One, two three... six ears! Thats a lot of earmuffs." De-Aged!Macaque: (*grumbling gets quieter. Absent-mindedly sucks on his fingers.*) Sandy, conflicted: "I... I really should just bring you to a police station or something. But something tells me that you'll need someone in your corner who understands how messy life can be. If I can manage it, would you be ok staying here with me?" De-Aged!Macaque: (*uninterested squeak*) Sandy, smile forming: "I'll take that as an Okey-dokey. Now... how about a name? Your white fur is super shiny in the moonlight... how about Moon?" "Moon": (*tares up at his new guardian with big violet eyes, one is milky and possibly blind. Makes a curious chirrup at the name.*) Sandy, heart-warming smile: "I think thats a winner."

Little Moon is a curious little guy. Not only because of his ears (the fish man jokes that it's his son's axolotl-like gills), but from an early age Moon has had control over shadows.

It began as simple fascination with stage magic. Moon watched stage magicians preform their tricks of misdirection and illusion, and wanted to see if he could replicate it.

Sandy: (*makes a bunny shape in the shadow of a lamp*) Moon: (*excited cheep!*) Moon: (*manipulates shadows to make many bunnies!*) Sandy, surprised: "Oh!"

Sandy was worried that this power wasn't something that could be trained easily, and an incident where Mo disappeared into one of Moon's shadows for an afternoon (reappeared unharmed once the treat bag was shaken) prompted the fish man to try and find an outlet for his kid.

Thats how he met The Nine Tailed Vixen. The elderly huli jing was hosting a children's acting class at her theatre, and Sandy wondered if it would aid his son's creative drive. It turned out to be a blessing since the heavenly fox was quick to identify, and help Moon tame his wild magic.

(Jiuweihuli is so relieved to have her protégé safe and sound again. Sandy is a good man, and she's glad that her little shadow has found a kind papa.)

Sensing a hunch, the old fox contacted Nezha on whether there wer other de-aged little monkeys...

Peaches and Moon meet during one of the acting camps. At first they cannot believe their eyes.

On sight they feel as though they've known the other their entire lives and beyond.

At the end of the day's acting camp, a group of old friends reunite.

Pigsy, with MK in a sling: "Sandy!?" Sandy: "Pigsy!" Peaches & Moon, running to their respective parent: "Baba!" Pigsy & Sandy, both surprised: "Baba!? You?!" "Yeah!" "Since when?" "Since I found him on the street!" "Whoa. weird."

Peaches and Moon are hard to separate after that meeting. Even if acting camp didn't turn out well for the ginger monkey (stage fright activated), they rarely go more than a week without an excited play date or visit to the theatre.

DBK's gut reaction to the young monkey demon holding his sworn brother's staff is; "Did Sun Wukong have a child- wait. What in Yama's name happened to you!?" Peaches doesn't answer the question as he nearly passes out screaming. Moon is half-way across town wondering what's scared his bestie so bad.

[anzulvr]

ʚɞ On Purpose Karma x (fem) Reader || Chapter: 1 ୨୧

001 Game Time || Next

[Name] was standing behind the chain-link fence, wide-eyed and immersed in the E-class VS A-class baseball game exhibition.

"You can't seriously be interested in this— since when are you a sports fan?" Kaho scoffed.

"Since today?" Truthfully, [Name] wasn't all that interested in the game, her eyes were set on Karma.

"Oh I get it, you've got a thing for one of the players!"

"What? No! Where'd you get that from?!"

"Shindo right? Don't worry, I won't tell!" Kaho noted with a breathy laugh.

[Name] nodded fervently. It was better for Kaho to believe [Name] liked Shindo rather than word get out that she was dating Karma.

It was Karma's idea to keep everything on the down low, that way people wouldn't give her a hard time for being with him.

"Batter number eight, left fielder, Akabane." The commentator on the speaker brought her attention back to the field.

Karma stayed in place, all eyes were on him.

"Hang on, never pegged you as the type to play dirty, sir. If the rules haven't changed this little gambit ain't legal, they're bogarting the infield umpire should have called 'em on it by now."

His voice grew in confidence by the second, "Oh come on, anyone else smell a rat or is it just me?"

Karma turned to face the fence where most of the main campus was spectating from.

"Oh never mind, you guys are morons! Baseballs like a foreign language to ya!"

[Names] peers collectively grew angry, yelling insults back at him. Karma took it all in stride, turning back with a smile, happy to have elicited a response.

No one expected E class to play this well, even Shindo looked defeated, Kunugigaokas star player was struggling to get a hit against the lowest ranked class.

"Preed, do you mind getting us something to drink?" Kaho half-heartedly requested.

"Yeah I've got you, I'll be back!" He scurried off instantly, anything Kaho asked from him went.

"Kaho… don't you think this is a little much?" [Name] asked.

"It's not like they'll find out. Guys are such idiots."

Kaho dated a lot but not out of love, she got a kick out of toying with people, or maybe she wanted to feel loved, [Name] couldn't know for sure, she was only able to make assumptions based on what she saw on the exterior since Kaho wasn't the type to speak vulnerably.

"You're with three guys this time, and Preed is nice, I feel bad." [Name] said disapprovingly, she kept her tone hushed and careful no one was listening in.

"He'll live… Are you with me or against me?"

"Okay, Okay sorry."

If Kaho wasn't with Preed, she was with Seo or Yozo. [Name] couldn't go a day without third wheeling, ever since Karma was moved down to end class she hadn't had anyone else to hang out with.

Who knew baseball could be so intense? At some point Karma dodged a bat to the face by the millisecond, eventually, the game ended, the speakers blasted for the final announcement.

"The game is over, I can't even— this is insane… the winner is, I never thought I'd say this but the winner is E-class…!"

The students from the main campus complained about the loss as they left, the only people cheering were in end class themselves.

"Preed still isn't back, I'll go look for him, see you around [Name]." Kaho sighed on her way out.

[Name] pulled her phone out and sent Karma a message.

message start

[Name] Meet me at the small building to my left?

Karma looked around the field until his eyes caught yours, his focus went back to your contact as he typed out a reply.

[Karma] Yeah just a second Ill have to make an excuse

message end

"What are you smiling about Karma?" Rio grinned while trying to get a peek at his phone from behind his shoulder, unfortunately for her, he could sense her creeping up on him before she got the chance.

"I'm getting a call, I'll meet back with everyone in a few!"

Once he was out of earshot Rio turned to Hinano "What's he lying for? I wasn't able to read his screen but I know he wasn't getting a call."

"That's suspicious… What if he's hiding a girl!" Says Hinano "Or a body!" Fuwa chimes in

"Out of those two outcomes the body seems more plausible…" Rio laughs, she tilts her head as if she's got a brilliant idea, "Hey Ritsu, you should listen in on what he's doing through his phone!"

"I shouldn't eavesdrop… I told everyone I wouldn't do anything without full consent."

Unfortunately for Ritsu, Rio's knack for sweet-talking has always been unmatched, "Exactly! As his friends we have to look out for him, we can't do that if he's sneaking around all the time, doing this would make you such a caring friend!"

"I'd be caring…? I guess that makes sense, okay I'll do it for friendship!" Ritsu, who’s new to all sorts of human emotions and expressions, naively gathers up her resolve. Now she’s just as involved as the rest of the group.

ᝰ ♡

Karma put his batting helmet on [Name's] head "Sorry you had to watch us destroy your class on the field." He bragged, not anything new.

"I was rooting for you, keeping my poker face was hard!"

"Your eyes were shaped like hearts and you were practically foaming at the mouth, your poker face could use some work."

"I was not! Anyway, how are things in E class? You look pretty close with everyone." [Name] turned the topic around.

"Is that jealousy I hear? Cute, but don't worry [Name] I still like you best."

"I'm not jealous! Just a little worried, the way Mr. Ono decided to send you to end class was harsh."

"I'm good I promise, I like it better in 3E, The only thing I miss about the main campus is you." He flicked her forehead. [Name] handed the helmet back to him, playfully shoving it into his chest.

"I know I complain about how annoying you are every day but, I wish Mr. Ono sent me to End class with you."

Karma smiled and shook his head no, "Don't go getting crazy ideas, tell you what, i'll take you out to eat as a consolation prize!"

"It's not a consolation prize if I wanted you to win!"

"Right, so what I'm hearing is, you're paying?"

"I take it back! I'm so upset you won…please pay for us!"

"Fineee…" He feigns disappointment "We'll go to [Café], right after school tomorrow, don't be late!"

[candyredmusings]

Bioshock Splicer Starters

Assortment of dialogue taken from the a from two types of Splicers in the first Bioshock game; Baby Jane and the Breadwinner

Other Bioshock Splicer starters: TBA [Dr. Grossman & Lady Smith] [Pigskin & Rosebud] [Toasty & Waders]

Baby Jane

Get away from my face! Not on my face!"

"Oh! Oh, God damn it!"

"Look at yourself! And you would do it too!"

"Talentless?! BORING?!"

"You don't deserve this!"

"I'm a star, not you!"

"You're jealous, jealous!"

"Why did you cut me?! Why?!"

"You did this to me! You!"

"I deserve it, you fuck!"

"Give me the part, you bastard!"

"Off. My. Stage! GET OFF!"

"Stop ogling me!"

"You're making me lose my place! STOP IT!"

"No, it's not perfect, AGAIN!"

"He's standing in the wrong place!"

"Get your FAT. HANDS. AWAY FROM ME!"

"Just say something, goddammit!"

"What's that? Is it him?!"

"I smell something nasty."

"Is that someone naughty?"

"Honey? Is that you…?"

"I heard that!"

"It hurts, it hurts…"

"Why did you…?"

"I'm sorry… We can do it together!"

"DARLING! I'M HOME EARLY!"

"I don't- I don't wanna- I don't wanna hear this… I- [Whimpering] I don't want to hear this…"

"Pretend you're not interested. They like that."

"Have it your way, you sleaze!"

"Well, that was good drama."

"Get a girl all bothered… for NOTHIN'!"

"That gets a girl's blood flowing."

"I'll be better next time! Please?! Don't go!"

"When we do meet, it's gonna be so nasty!"

"He's gone! They always leave…"

"When I murder you I'm gonna put your body in a dress!"

"My god, there's so much blood!"

"Aw, Jesus, what did you do to me?!"

"I'm NOT. DEALING WITH THIS!"

"No… No No No. Wha- What's- What's that? Oh, no no, no…"

"In the theater, a woman gets used to attention."

"She was up for the part as well, but then they found her in a salt pond."

"I was gonna be famous… now look at this dump!"

"Who needs to make it on Broadway? When you can make it here."

"What's the matter with me…? I'm pretty enough!"

"Hey fella'! Don't 'cha wanna take a walk with me?"

"Come on, baby! You told me you was gonna take care of me! Were you lying…?"

"I used to be beautiful. What happened to me?!"

"Why are you making this so hard for me?!"

"C'mere and say that to my face, you slimey bastard!"

"You wanna play with me?"

"Hello? Did you come to talk to me?"

"I can be nice if I want to…"

"Next time, work on your timing."

"Oh, and we were just getting to the best bit!"

"Tell me you love me! Go on, say it!"

"Just pretend, you imbecile!"

"You ruined me!"

"No one touches me! No one!"

"You won't touch me again!"

"Someone shou- should do this for me, someone should be doing this for me!"

Breadwinner

"Get out of my territory!"

"Amateur! Fuckin' amateur!"

"I'm top dog, you shit!"

"GET OUTA MY FUCKIN' OFFICE!"

"You come to my town?! To MY TOWN?!"

"You're a nobody! Nobody!"

"Who the hell is that?"

"Yeah? Well, you're fired! Ya got that?"

"I was right, I tell ya. I was right, god damn it."

"Come on. Gimme a break!"

"Come on. Just let me explain, will ya?"

 "I'm too busy for this shit."

"Waste of my goddamn time."

"This isn't makin' me time OR money!"

"Goddammit, I'm bleeding!"

"Ahh. Ahh yeah, finally some service! Woo!"

"What happened to this thing?"

"Ha, it's my lucky day!"

"She should not have come here."

"Ah, a man can start a business down here, yeah. Now now, it's- it's not too late. I'll get to it."

"It's just a bad quarter. Naw, that's all. Yeah, market'll come back, huh? Yeah! Everything'll be fine. Yeah, it'll all be fine… Augh."

"I just gotta wait out the down cycle. I'm a success… I'm a fuckin' success!"

"I ain't afraid of failure… cause I ain'ts gonna fail!"

"These assholes don't get it. I'm a winner!"

"Came here to get rich… ain't gonna leave 'till I do!"

"Came down here with a dream… That dream's gonna happen."

"Aw, come on… they're gonna kill me if I lose you!"

"That's it? We're done?"

"You think that I'm dumb? Sure, sure, why not? You keep on thinkin' that."

"You think I wouldn't notice if you just waltzed in here? Huh?"

"I'll tell you what: I'll pay you to stay alive next time. How's that for a deal, you shit head."

"I earned this! Me!"

"You give it to me, you hear?"

"Just open your mouth."

"Ah, whose fault is this?"

"Look at this dump! Nothing left but nothing!"

[thescarletnargacuga]

Since you're allowing it for the time being, here's a Raceway Y/N prompt for your consideration:

Another day, another race ending with getting smacked all the way to last place. You thought you were finally beginning to adjust to all this, but some of these people seemed to drive like absolute maniacs, ESPECIALLY the jester-looking one. What was her name again?

What were any of their names, for that matter?

…Suddenly you felt very isolated. From the beginning, you could tell the other racers had known eachother for a while. They were a tight-knit group. Then there was you.

You felt like an intruder. An uninvited guest. The family member everyone else wanted nothing to do with.

There was a strong heaviness in your heart. You decide to find a quiet corner in the garage to sulk…

RACEWAY AU CHARACTERS REACT TO Y/N SULKING

CAINE: He'll sit next to you in the corner. His voice is surprisingly calm. "What seems to be the matter? I can't have one of my racers in the dumps." He'll listen to all of your worries and fears with a sympathetic ear. If you need a hug, he will gladly give you one. "I recommend talking to the others. Human social circles thrive best with good communication, so I've been told."

POMNI: She feels awkward for walking in on you in such a vulnerable state, but you're clearly in distress. "Hey, uh...you okay?" If she is the reason you're like this, tell her. She's fiercely competitive on the track, but she isn't heartless. If things went too far, she'll apologize.

RAGATHA: "Oh no, Y/N? What's going on? Do you need a hug?" If you let her, she will hold you and even cuddle you, patting your head. "You can tell me anything, Y/N. I'm here for you." She means it. She'd be horrified if she gave off the impression that she wasn't approachable. She wants to fix that immediately.

JAX: He regrets walking by. Now he has to do the comfort thing? Ugh. He leaves and comes back, holding something behind his back. He goes over to you and drops a balloon full of whipped cream on your head. It's hard to be sad when you're mad.

GANGLE: "Y/N..?" She'll say softly. If you don't feel like talking, that's okay. She sits at a respectful distance and draws. She draws you in the winner's circle. "I made this for you... because you're a winner."

ZOOBLE: They join you in the sulking corner, not saying a word. If you start talking, they'll listen. If you don't, they'll still stay. No one should be alone dealing with shitty emotions.

KINGER: He finds you entirely accidentally. He was following a beetle that wandered in from outside. He catches it and shows it to you. "Jewel beetle. Very pretty. Shiny. Want to hold?"

GUMMIGOO: "What seems to be the problem, mate?" He leans against the wall, arms crossed. "Did Jax do something to ya? I'll flatten him for ya." He'll listen if you want to actually tell him what's going on. "I speak from experience when I say, give them time. This group is far more accepting than you think. Try not to take what happens on the track personally."

LOO: "Oh, dear me, you poor thing." She'll straight pick you up and rock you like a baby. "Tell aunty Loo what's bothering you. I'm all ears."

SETH: "Life's a bitch, ain't it?" You don't know when he got there, but he's leaning against the wall next to you. "You wanna get out of here? One outcast to another, they're not worth the tears." He'll take you away on his motorcycle. You may not want to go back.

ABEL: He doesn't care. If you are of no use to him, you can sulk until you fall through the floor. There's always room in the cellar...

[ywpd-translations]

Ride 742: Sudden death match!!

Pag 1

1: Woah, Danchiku, oh-

And Sugimoto-san too!?

2: They passed us so quickly!! Such high pace!!

Huh!?

They're doing some sort of serious race!?

3: I get it

4: I can feel it

5: This guy....!!

Pag 2

1: He's not giving up at all!!

Pag 3

3: Earlier, at the line, I thought I had won this race

I thought he was far behind me and would cross the line with his head hanging down

4: And yet....

Pag 4

1: He caught up to me....!!

2: The preliminary of this race was already done on the “second day”!!

3: That time, the result

5: was a draw!!

6: So it would be better to have a more precise result, wouldn't it

We'll decide it with this lap!! The rules are simple: the starting point line is 4km from here, the one who crosses it first wins!!

7: And then the loser shouldn't “surpass” the winner anymore!! Sugimoto-san!!

Pag 5

1: Imaizumi-san too!!

2: …. yeah

It's better to make it clear with a proper race like this

3: So you have no regrets....!!

4: Let's go!!

5: Crush him, Danchiku!!

Pag 6

2: At the same time....!!

Ah.... “at the same time” again!?

3: Seriously!?

Are you being for real, Sadatoki!?

Pag 7

1: You're just seeing things as you wish they were,since he's your brother!!

Oon!! No that's not it, on!!

It's true, Kaburagi, I saw it too

2: They arrived at the same time, Sugimoto stretched at the last moment

3: Kawada!!

It's “san”!!

4: Are you an accomplice too!!

What are you talkin abut

5: A- amazing, Sugimoto-kun

6: Amazing!!

Pag 8

1: “Amazing”, huh, Onoda

2: Imaizumi-kun....

Pfui

3: You thought Sugimoto would win? ….This race

Huh

4: You didn't think he would, that's why when we heard the results you could say “amazing”

Ah!!

5: I'm- I'm sorry Sugimoto-kun!! I didn't believe in you, even though you worked so hard....!!

Who are you yelling at

6: Me too

Pag 9

2: During these past four days.... Sugimoto worked hard, but, after their race on the second day and after seeing how remarkably stronger Danchiku has gotten

3: When they decided to do another race, I thought Sugimoto would definitely lose

4: Then, when the time came

5: If you lose, you feel better if you gave it your all, so

6: “So you have no regrets”

7: I said that

But

8: He turned it around

Sugimoto really is amazing

Pag 10

1: Even with no one believing in him, with only his own strength, he snatched a “draw” against Danchiku!!

Pag 11

1: Keep going!! Let's keep going with the race, Danchiku!!

2: Even though he's having such an hard time, he's still following me!!

3: Since earlier I've increased the pace many times

4: Garuaaa

Even if I tear him off

Pag 12

1: Every time

2: While saying

3: “Kuaa kuaa”

“Kuaa kuaa”

5: Kuaaa-

6: Kuaaaaaaa

He catches up to me

Pag 13

2: You keep following me....

3: No....

4: You're the one who said “please follow me”, Danchiku

Pag 14

1: Garuaaa!!

2: Ahhhh

Don't make fun of me, there's no way!!

3: Aaaaaaaa

4: Hiigaruaaaa!!

There's no way I'll lose!!

Pag 15

1: To Sugimoto-san!!

4: I was careless – I was careless and that's why he caught up to me!! The second time too!!

I won't be careless this time!!

Pag 16

1: Ill take a plunge firmly, throw my handles, and cross the line

2: At full throttle!!

The last curve!!

3: He's not following me anymore!! He's....

Pag 17

1: He's here!!

Cough cough

2: Kuaaaa

We're entering the final sprint!!

3: Dammit, this guy is gonna stretch from here!!

4: Hiigaruaaaaa!!

Take a plunge!!

5: Take a plunge!!

Pag 18

1: Throw your handles!!

Pag 19

1: Wooooah!!

No... wait, even now....

2: It's a draw!!

Ya!!

On!!

Woah

3: Dammit, what happened, Danchiku what are you doin!!

You should be much stronger..... should....

Pag 20

1: Don't tell me.... that Sugimoto-san.... is strong too!?

2: You.... you mean it's a draw for the third time!!

How long will they keep going, at this pace it won't ever end!!

3: …. no

5: It's a shame, but there's no time left...

6: This lap is the last

[atomic-rattz]

guess who

In lipstick on the mirror

Are the lyrics to my obituary

In iambic pentameter, followed parameter

Crossing my eyes, dot my T's

I was delivered holding scissors

I live deliberately, I'm a quitter

And a winner anyway

Cause I never agreed to participate in this game

Won't follow my dreams

No, they've all got me waking up screaming

I can let them go from me

After all there is no "I" in team

And I'd rather be normal. Yes, so normal

I suggest that we keep this informal

Cause a normal human being wouldn't need

To pretend to be normal to be normal

Well I guess that's the least that I owe ya

To be normal in a way I couldn't be

C'mon, c'mon, and love me normally

If I could live in third person

Well I don't think life would be much worse than it is

In the current tense, presently

This sentence ending with question marks or dot dot dot

Is it courageous or escapist

To leave the quarantine when you're contagious

It may just be a cold

And besides I don't wanna get old

I drank myself to death to be the afterlife of the party

When the afterparty came, I was rolling in my grave

And I'd rather be normal. Yes, so normal

I suggest that we keep this informal

Cause a normal human being wouldn't need

To pretend to be normal to be normal

Well I guess that's the least that I owe ya

To be normal in a way I couldn't be

C'mon, c'mon, and love me normally

Now this is the part of the song where I like to talk to my audience

I like to tell 'em there's something I want from you hep cats tonight

I want you to look to your left, look to your right

Your 12 o'clock, three o'clock, six o'clock, nine o'clock, rock around the clock tonight

And I want you to find those points of no return, those singularities

Those burning rings of fire in the beautiful pupils of the beautiful eyes of the beautiful

Boy, girl, neither, both, or in-between that you brought with you tonight

And I want you to tell 'em how you really feel

I want you to tell 'em that you love the way they so seamlessly, like a dreamfully

So beautifully, oh so dutifully

Jam that square peg in the round hole in their heart

I want you to tell 'em that you love the way

That they don't stick out like sore middle fingers

That they crawl their way up the side of the bell curve

Stick their flag in the peak, and slide their way back down

I want you to tell them that you love the way that they're not maladaptive

Not malcontent, not malignant or maleficent, but rather that you love them

Exactly the way that everybody else is

I was nothing before so I couldn't have asked to be born

I'll be nothing again, so what am I between now and then

Is there nothing to fear? Cause shit's getting weird

So to God who made this man, you better have one hell of a plan

I'd rather be normal. Yes, so normal

I suggest that we keep this informal

Cause a normal human being wouldn't need. No

To pretend to be normal to be normal

Well I guess that's the least that I owe ya

To be normal in a way I could never be

C'mon, c'mon, yeah, I said c'mon, yeah

C'mon, c'mon, yeah, I said c'mon, yeah

C'mon, c'mon, and love me normally

[judethebrood]

When Paris said "If we had a daughter, I'd watch and could not save her. The emotional torture, from the head of your high table. She'd do what you taught her, she'd meet the same cruel fate".

When Hozier said "When my time comes around, lay me gently in the cold dark earth. No grave can hold my body down. I'll crawl home to her".

When Florence said "Then bow your head in the house of God. Little girl, who do you think you are? You think you need it, you think you want love. You wouldn't want it if you knew what it was".

When Lana said "Is it me, was I wrong to have trusted you? Did I see what I wanted, what wasn't true? Was I wrong to go on like a little fool? It's amazing what women in love will do".

When Marina said "Started in the strangest way. Didn't see it coming, swept up in your hurricane. Wouldn't give it up for nothing. Now I'm all caught up in the highs and the lows. It's a shock to my system. I don't wanna run away so I stay. My head gets messy when I try to hide the things I love about you in my mind. I don't really know a lot about love".

When Morrisey said "And if a double-decker bus crashes into us, to die by your side is such a heavenly way to die. And if a ten ton truck kills the both of us, to die by your side, well, the pleasure, the privilege is mine".

When Stevie and Lindsey said "Love somebody save their soul. Tie them to your heaven erase their hell. Love their lifestyle if you feel it. Don't try to change them you never will. Sunflowers and your face fascinate me. You go into the dusty pink day. I come a calling unto you, but you run. You're the winner. Long distance winner. You're the winner. Long distance winner".

When Kate said "And if I only could, I'd make a deal with God, and I'd get him to swap our places. Be runnin' up that road. Be runnin' up that hill. Be runnin' up that building. Say, if I only could".

When Joni said "The last time I saw Richard was Detroit in 68. And he told me, "All romantics meet the same fate. Some day, cynical and drunk and boring. Someone in some dark cafe" "You laugh", he said, "You think you're immune? Go look at your eyes, they're full of moon. You like roses and kisses and pretty men to tell you all those pretty lies, pretty lies. When you gonna realise they're only pretty lies? Only pretty lies, just pretty lies".

When Bob said "She said, "Where ya been?" I said, "No place special" She said, "You look different." I said, "Well, I guess" She said, "You been gone." I said, "That's only natural" She said, "You gonna stay?" I said, "If you want me to, yes".

When Mitski said "You're growing tired of me. You love me so hard and I still can't sleep. You're growing tired of me, and all the things I don't talk about. Sorry, I don't want your touch. It's not that I don't want you. Sorry, I can't take your touch. It's just that I fell in love with a war. Nobody told me it ended. And it left a pearl in my head, and I roll it around every night. Just to watch it glow. Every night, baby, that's where I go".

When Glass animals said "Bye bye baby blue. I wish you could see the wicked truth. Caught up in a rush, it's killing you. Screaming at the sun, you blow into. Curled up in a grip when we were us. Fingers in a fist like you might run. I settle for a ghost I never knew. Superparadise I held on to, but I settle for a ghost".

When the Killers said "They say the devil's water, it ain't so sweet. You don't have to drink right now, but you can dip your feet, every once in a little while. You sit there in your heartache, waiting on some beautiful boy to. To save you from your old ways. You play forgiveness. Watch it now, here he comes. He doesn't look a thing like Jesus, but he talks like a gentlemen, like you imagined when you were young. When you were young".

When Radiohead said "You are the sun and moon and stars are you. And I could never run away from you. You try at working out chaotic things. And why should I believe myself, not you? It's like the world is gonna end so soon. And why should I believe myself? You, me and everything, caught in the fire. I can see me drowning, caught in the fire. You, me and everything, caught in the fireI can see me drowning, caught in the fire".

Yeah. That.

[writeblrgarden]

PLANT GROWERS - MEET THE WINNERS - RAE

Meet Rae, who got third place in our grow a plant event in november! Rae goes by she/her, has a second degree black belt in kendo, and you can find her at @koala2all. She has been writing for about 30 years, primarily YA fantasy.

Tell us about the WIP you'd like to talk about today.

I'll be talking about The Pirate Knight. Being a pirate is all Nonie has ever wanted. Freedom, camaraderie, and a beautiful girl in port to welcome her back. But returning from a lucrative voyage, she finds her home in shambles and her bonny lass missing. Desperate to find her, Nonie makes a deal with the god of the sea. In return for helping return her lost love Nonie vows to become his holy knight, saving the weak and defending the helpless. Together with a cynical sorcerer, a naive orc, and an ex-girlfriend from a rival ship who promises not to rest until their mission is a success, Nonie sets out to prove that she can be a hero in time to save the love of her life. But when a world changing secret is revealed, Nonie will need the help of her friends to navigate the tempest.

Describe your writing process. Do you like to plan everything or are you more spontaneous?

I'm more spontaneous. I usually start a bit backwards actually. I know how I want a story to end, then where it begins, and the rest is a matter of figuring out how to get from point A to point B. Music plays a huge part in my process, as well. I often get inspired by a song for a set of characters or a situation, then I try to figure out where it can fit.

What have you found to be the most challenging and/or rewarding about writing?

The most challenging part of writing for me is that I often feel like I don't know what I'm doing. I'm just kind of winging it, writing stories that make me happy about characters that I enjoy writing about… but up to a year ago I didn't know what a beta reader was. My background is in theater, so I know how to frame a story in three acts… but without the background in creative writing, the imposter syndrome is real!

Below the read more is more of our conversation with Rae

What inspires you to write?

Books were such an escape for me when I was little. All those amazing worlds and vivid characters really helped me through some tough times. And that's what I want to share with others. The world is a hard place right now. I want to give readers a place that they can escape to, with characters they can empathize with as they face trials and overcome them. And maybe take a little hope with them when they're done.

Share some advice for other writers.

The best advice I ever got was from a Terry Pratchett quote. He said, "The first draft is just you telling yourself the story." I am definitely the type of person who dreams of the first draft coming out absolutely perfect. When it doesn't come out that way, I can tend to get a little frustrated. But after I heard this quote, I realized that the first draft is going to be rubbish. That's okay, and that's what editing is for. First, I just need to tell myself the story.

What do consider your writing strength?

Dialogue and worldbuilding are my strengths, for sure. I have such a strong sense of the world my characters find themselves in. My favorite technique is to not explain too much to the reader, but let them come across the world naturally as the characters navigate through it. It's my favorite way of experiencing the world of a story! Dialogue writing is so much fun. I love bantering with my friends, and imagining the banter between two characters is just as entertaining. I myself am a bit snarky (in a delightful way, of course) and that tends to make its way into at least one of the characters speech patterns.

What has been the nicest compliment you've received or what has been the toughest criticism you've received?

When I finished my first novel, I sent it to a knitting acquaintance of mine who happened to be a book reviewer as well. It was nerve wracking, since I had only let friends and family look at any of my writing before, but I had dreams of publishing and wanted to make the story as good as I could before I started sending it out. Her review came back glowing. Four out of five stars, and compliments about the worldbuilding, the characters, the plot, the dialogue. It was such a good feeling!

What do you love the most about writing?

My characters, and sharing them. I love making characters… ever since I was little. I get such a kick out of giving a character a backstory, and then seeing how they grow through the course of the story. Sometimes they really surprise me! And seeing them become important to the readers is really exciting, too!

[daylilifiedsundrewdrops]

Tape Recording #1.

[ CLICK ] Hm... Ah, I didn't know tape recorders were this big... What was that thing they used to say? Testing, testing. 1, 2, 76... ... Good enough! Soo... I should introduce myself, shouldn't I?

[They clear their throat.] So, uh, Hi there, Mr. Tape Recorder! I'm Maricel Mylene V. Rosarinde. Or just Maricel. That should work too. The 'V' stands for Vallenza, in-case you were wondering. I'm a student at Avidenia Willow Institute. Grade-6 specifically. I've always seen my classmates have these like... personal diaries. But! I thought it was way cooler to have an audio diary. Like a podcast or something! Though, I've never actually listened to one, hm.... Anyway, since Tape Recordings can't consent, Let me tell you aaaaa---lllllll about my day and about events at scho- Oh- Shi- [Silence for a couple minutes... Now, it sounds like someone stood up and is now hitting their head onto a pillow.] [Never-mind, they're back on the chair.] ...Haha, sorry, Mr. Tape Recorder. Had a headache for a moment there. Anyway, as I was saying, All about my day and about events at my school. So, to start off! I was late to school today. Again. For the third time this week. But no worries, the teachers could really uh... care less this time around. So, all I got was a slap to the arm and I was good to go. Speaking of being late! I also conveniently forgot one of my journals I used for creative writing while I was rushing for class which suuuccckssss... but it's fine. Whatever. Anyways, so school itself was mostly uneventful. Except for during recess when Nathaniel accidentally spilled juice on Angel's uniform! It was actually funny how Angel got so mad at him. She had to change into the P.E uniform because of it. Luckily, she packed an extra grooming kit in her classroom. She unfortunately could not save her uniform from getting stains, however. [They're laughing through their words.] Anyway, sorry, sorry. So, on another note, the Book Club has organized this year's new readathon for those who wanted to sign up! Guess their campaign's succeeded cause nearly everyone in the school joined. Including me, of course. It started today, and oh-ho, I think all the books in the school library has been hoarded completely. I went there and it was absolutely deserted. Mr. Lauriette was still hangin' by his desk like he always did though. I read only one book today, '' The Second World '' by Sarah Eviernes. Club Leader, Carmelita, announced that the 3 winners of the readathon will have 3 unique, mystery prizes given to them. Neat! I hope it's going to be good like a cat or something. Aside from that, I heard there's a local art contest about to be opened near the school. And I am SO signing up for it once the organizers start looking into our school for volunteers. The theme this time is something 'Magical' and I'm sure I'll ace it completely! I mean, there's like a 5% chance of me actually winning but, ya' know, it's worth a shot just for that small, small chance that I would win! Plus, the prize is a sweet 5,000 PHP, and I want that money. Plus, runner-ups get 700 and people who participated but didn't win still get 100. So, the money's worth it. Now, on another, more... negative note. Another 5 students were reported missing. 2 From our school and 3 from Wilvewood High. It's strange, though. Luis and Andrea were there. They were always cautious and... y'know, stuff like that. So, I don't think they could've gotten kidnapped unless.... Hmmm. Anyway, this is getting waayyyyyyyy too not-so-positive for me! [Sounds of someone wrongly imitating a cough-sound.] Cough, cough... anyways. Let's end the tape recorder off with after-school. I walked home because my parents didn't wanna come get me and it wasn't that far. So, my mom was home early. Guess what! She uh.. cooked dinner for us. Sinigang. But no rice. It tasted salty without the rice, I didn't like it. Though, afterwards, I managed to sneak in my phone up here in my bedroom and of course, this tape-recorder! Which I am currently using right now to record... you know! [Silence.] Gee, I'm- Ow- going to end this off here, I'm having another headache, see ya tomorrow, Mr. Tape Recorder! End recordi- Damnit this is- killing my head- [CLICK]

[night-vale-daily]

In lipstick on the mirror

Are the lyrics to my obituary

In iambic pentameter, followed parameter

Crossing my eyes, dot my T's

I was delivered holding scissors

I live deliberately, I'm a quitter

And a winner anyway

Cause I never agreed to participate in this game

Won't follow my dreams

No, they've all got me waking up screaming

I can let them go from me

After all there is no "I" in team

And I'd rather be normal. Yes, so normal

I suggest that we keep this informal

Cause a normal human being wouldn't need

To pretend to be normal to be normal

Well I guess that's the least that I owe ya

To be normal in a way I couldn't be

C'mon, c'mon, and love me normally

If I could live in third person

Well I don't think life would be much worse than it is

In the current tense, presently

This sentence ending with question marks or dot dot dot

Is it courageous or escapist

To leave the quarantine when you're contagious

It may just be a cold

And besides I don't wanna get old

I drank myself to death to be the afterlife of the party

When the afterparty came, I was rolling in my grave

And I'd rather be normal. Yes, so normal

I suggest that we keep this informal

Cause a normal human being wouldn't need

To pretend to be normal to be normal

Well I guess that's the least that I owe ya

To be normal in a way I couldn't be

C'mon, c'mon, and love me normally

Now this is the part of the song where I like to talk to my audience

I like to tell 'em there's something I want from you hep cats tonight

I want you to look to your left, look to your right

Your 12 o'clock, three o'clock, six o'clock, nine o'clock, rock around the clock tonight

And I want you to find those points of no return, those singularities

Those burning rings of fire in the beautiful pupils of the beautiful eyes of the beautiful

Boy, girl, neither, both, or in-between that you brought with you tonight

And I want you to tell 'em how you really feel

I want you to tell 'em that you love the way they so seamlessly, like a dreamfully

So beautifully, oh so dutifully

Jam that square peg in the round hole in their heart

I want you to tell 'em that you love the way

That they don't stick out like sore middle fingers

That they crawl their way up the side of the bell curve

Stick their flag in the peak, and slide their way back down

I want you to tell them that you love the way that they're not maladaptive

Not malcontent, not malignant or maleficent, but rather that you love them

Exactly the way that everybody else is

I was nothing before so I couldn't have asked to be born

I'll be nothing again, so what am I between now and then

Is there nothing to fear? Cause shit's getting weird

So to God who made this man, you better have one hell of a plan

I'd rather be normal. Yes, so normal

I suggest that we keep this informal

Cause a normal human being wouldn't need. No

To pretend to be normal to be normal

Well I guess that's the least that I owe ya

To be normal in a way I could never be

C'mon, c'mon, yeah, I said c'mon, yeah

C'mon, c'mon, yeah, I said c'mon, yeah

C'mon, c'mon, and love me normally

- Nature Tapes

Hey, that's my favorite song! No particular reason why.

[browntownalley]

Winner Takes All 2/4

You'd slept all through the picnic, waking up with a sloggy jump, eyes still closed as you remembered:

"I've gotta help Poppy with the– and the–!"

"Woah-WOAH there, String Bean. Heheh. You're awake!" It was Barnaby’s cozy voice. You had been thrown over the blue dog's shoulder like a sack of potatoes, looking at one of the main cobblestone roads in the neighborhood. The sun was getting low.

Wally was nowhere in sight. Just a few blossoms left in your combed hair.

Sliding off of the big blue beagle rivaled the misery of getting out of a warm bed on a cold day, but you still had work to do. Biscuits to bake! You ran off with the grace of a drunken spider before you even knew quite where you were.

"See ya around, String Bean!!"

—-

In Poppy's barn you were mostly helping keep the place clean and cookware available as Poppy handled the more dangerous parts such as melting the chocolate, handling anything remotely pointy or opening the oven- lest you be roasted alive. Once the biscuits were baking, you both started prepping the surprise treat for everyone's busy, hectic day.

"Now, what species of cookie will this be?" You asked aloud and rubbed your chin, trying to think hard. Really hard. Your head started to glow, but all the energy was turning straight into heat.

Poppy was setting the kitchen to get to work, "Indeed! Would it be better to give everyone the same cookie or each a unique cookie?" She emphasized the last few words with such great importance and tediousness, inspired by the idea but also intimidated.

"Genuis idea Poppy," you snap your fingers.

"Wh- which one?"

"All of them."

"Bwawk?"

"Like a wedding theme, but each one dressed in its own cute little outfit." You beamed, excited to give them to the neighbors after the play.

"Oh my…" Poppy tapped the bend of her wing to her beak in thought before her eyes brightened. She and you started bouncing around all the thinks the neighbors had been tending to or doing for fun until the only two who didn't have their own theme-able activity was Julie and Wally

"Julie's uh… And Wally? Hm," Your hand went back to your chin and you pressed your lips to think. You’d spotted Wally around other neighbors mostly; though you couldn’t remember what was happening around him. At least not when you thought of the host specifically.

"They were ah, running around. Falling." You said as memories flash through your head, crammed by every other going-on and a few that may have just been part of your nap dream.

"Falling?" 

"Wally was falling." you stated more confidently, a proud smile as your noggin finally pulled through.

Poppy's feathers nearly blew off like a bomb, "Oh MY! I hope he's okay!"

"Everything's alright," You reassured the giant bird with a gentle pat, "Wally's a graceful little cookie. He nearly fell into the pond, and off a ladder, nearly fell upwards on Sally's stage, but I was there each time to watch him... Watch him catch himself I mean… I'm telling ya, Poppy he'd make a great ninja." 

"Well, I did just see him and Jules a little bit ago, heading into the fields; they seemed alright– BWAK! What if he falls out of a tree! I should check on him." Poppy flared again, but you soothed her colorful floof down with a few pats.

"Don't fret your feathers, Poppy! I'll pop by and see what they're up to, and then we can make their cookies just as stylish as the others." 

"Oh… Well, you are much faster than I am. Alright, be safe, Y/N." Poppy was still nervous, but you were glad she was entrusting this mission to you, and even more excited to see what Wally would fall out of next as you skeddaddled out the door.

—-

You found Julie Joyful sitting on a blanket in a field of flowers, humming a made-up tune as she tucked one into a loop of delicately woven grass. The sky was dark but the moon was glaring tonight, and Julie had a lamp to help brighten things up even more.

“Y/N!” she squeaked happily, flapping her arms around excitedly.

“Oop- where’s the show?” you asked jokingly as you looked around, flattered by Julie's excitement even if you had no clue what it was for.

Julie covered her mouth with her hands and piped down to a giggle before whispering loudly, “Wally’s getting more flowers for me, you should surprise him with this!” She held an elegant flower crown over her head and you couldn’t help but smirk mischievously as some heat warmed your cheeks.

Julie knew. She been knew.

“How am I supposed to surprise Wally, he can practically see through walls.”

“Darling’s been buggin’ out about you all day! Just hit ‘em with a–” Julie winked dramatically at you and bit her lip. You burst out laughing, more from the blatant encouragement than the silly face.

Taking the crown, you hum and grin smugly, turning it over in your hands. Yes, you’d noticed the way Wally’s been looking at you lately, the nervousness in his voice when you approached him for small talk: nervous, hesitant, hopeful; how jumpy and airheaded he’s been- as if something was taking up space in that mind of his.

You finally went over toward the treeline, wondering why Wally would come all the way over here just to pick flowers, but you found the show host sitting on a branch picking blossoms, like the ones stuck in your hair. You watched him silently at first as he paused to twirl one between soft digits. Lost in thought.

Okay, how do I surprise… You started to walk forward absentmindedly as you pondered what to do, flipping the crown over in your hands as your shoes brushed the grass.

“Oh, Julie, I found more,” Wally’s voice sounded just above you, and as you looked up in confusion, Wally swung backward, hanging by his knees to show ‘Julie’ his collection.

You just barely missed each other, and while you weren’t expecting to find an upside-down Wally in your face, your surprise was dwarfed by the wide black eyes and reddening face before you. There was a moment of silence where your faces are just… there, three inches apart.

“N-Neighbor?” Wally's voice broke, trying his best to keep cool. The perfect opportunity to tease.

“Mwa,” you make a bland kissy noise. You thought it was funny, but Wally looked like he’d been headshot by cupid. His balance suddenly became awkward, and his knees started to slip. Wally instinctively started to react, albeit slow. Had you not shut down half of his brain and literally been in his way he may have succeeded somehow.

With an obvious smirk stuck on your face, you hold out your arms and Wally’s petite form plops right into them. 

“‘Morning, Darling,” 

=Wally just stared in awe at you at first-- a tomato-- but eventually, his rigid body relaxed into yours and a sheepish smile starts to show. You held him a little closer and he chuckled against you.

“Good evening, Neighbor,” Wally finally greets you back.

“Julie gave me this flower crown,” you said as you started walking back with the yellow puppet in your arms, “I think I was supposed to wear it though, it’s not gonna fit on you with that bread roll.”

Wally blinked, “My pompadour?”

“That’s what it’s called?”

Wally gave you an incredulous look before taking the crown from your hand and sitting up to place it on your head. He and you both sport poker faces as Wally lingers there and you slow your pace to a stop. 

“So, how does it look?” You shiver a little as your bodies press a little closer, a digit tracing behind your ear and down your jaw. Wally smiled calmly in thought, suddenly so bold studying your features. It wasn't until you leaned just slightly into his hand that he cracked. Once again a tomato with eyes elsewhere. His hand slipped away.

"It looks lovely on you. Julies getting good at her craf-"

Wally stuttered to a stop when you hugged him closer, chasing after the touch he'd pulled away. He didn't resist at all despite his eyes going wide.

"You're not so bad yourself," You spoke just loud enough for the words to hop the short distance between your lips and his. Though his cheeks were burning, Wally, eyes were glossed over, his hands squeezing softly at your shoulders, bracing. Even now the unspoken contest between you persisted. 

You know you want to.

I'm waiting. Even stunned to silence, you bantered.

But then, just as you were wondering how those soft lips would feel against yours, another thought hitchhiked with it and brought a sudden rush of guilt and panic as you remembered what you were even out there for.

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

[lovesongbracket]

Reminder: Vote based on the song, not the artist or specific recording! The tracks referenced are the original artist, aside from a few rare cases where a cover is the most widely known.

Lyrics, videos, info, and notable covers under the cut. (Spotify playlist available in pinned post)

Love, Me Normally

Written By: Will Wood

Artist: Will Wood

Released: 2020

A smooth and jazzy ballad about feeling like an outlier. Posted in 2016, Will Wood was a guest on WPTV-6, performing this song for the episode. The studio recording of this single was created in 2018, but unreleased until May of 2020.

[Verse 1] In lipstick on the mirror are the lyrics to my obituary In iambic pentameter, followed parameter, cross my eyes, dot my T's I was delivered holding scissors, I live deliberately, I’m a quitter And a winner anyway, cause I never agreed to participate in this game Won't follow my dreams, 'cause they all got me waking up screaming I can’t let them go for me, after all, there is no “I” in team [Chorus] And I'd rather be normal, yes, so normal I suggest that we keep this informal 'Cause a normal human being wouldn't need To pretend to be normal, to be normal Well I guess that's the least that I owe ya To be normal in a way I couldn’t be C’mon, c’mon, and love me normally [Verse 2] If I could live in third person, well, I don’t think life would be much worse than it is In the current tense, presently, this sentence ending in question marks or dot, dot, dot Is it courageous or escapist to leave the quarantine when you’re contagious? It may just be a cold, and besides I don’t wanna get old, yeah I drank myself to death to be the afterlife of the party When the afterparty came, I was rolling in my grave [Chorus] And I'd rather be normal, yes, so normal I suggest that we keep this informal 'Cause a normal human being wouldn't need To pretend to be normal, to be normal Well I guess that's the least that I owe ya To be normal in a way I couldn’t be C’mon, c’mon, and love me normally [Bridge 1, spoken] Now this is the part of the song where I like to talk to my audience I like to tell 'em there's something I want from you hep cats tonight I want you to look to your left, look to your right, your 12 o'clock, three o'clock, six o'clock, nine o'clock, rock around the clock tonight And I want you to find those points of no return, those singularities, those burning rings of fire in the beautiful pupils and the beautiful eyes of the beautiful boy, girl, neither, both, or in-between that you brought with you tonight, and I want you to tell 'em how you really feel I want you to love the way they so seamlessly, like-a-dream-fully, so beautifully, oh-so-dutifully jam that square peg in the round hole in their hearts I want you to tell 'em that you love the way that they don't stick out like sore middle fingers That they crawl their way up the side of the bell curve, stick their flag in the peak, and slide their way back down I want you to tell them that you love the way that they're not maladaptive, not malcontent, not malignant or maleficent, but rather that you love them exactly the way that everybody else is [Bridge 2] I was nothing before, so I couldn’t have asked to be born I'll be nothing again, so what am I between now and then? Is there nothing to fear? Cause shit's getting weird So to God who made this man, you better have one hell of a plan [Chorus] And I'd rather be normal, yes, so normal I suggest that we keep this informal 'Cause a normal human being wouldn't need, no To pretend to be normal, to be normal Well, I guess that's the least that I owe ya To be normal in a way I could never be C’mon, c’mon, yeah, I said c’mon, yeah C’mon, c’mon, yeah, I said c’mon, yeah C’mon, c’mon, and love me normally C'mon, c'mon and love me normally

Do I Wanna Know?

Written By: Alex Turner

Artist: Arctic Monkeys

Released: 2013

Cover included: Hozier, 2014

“Do I Wanna Know” is the second single from AM, premiered live at the Ventura Theatre, CA on May 22, 2013. In it, Alex portrays himself as an obsessive lover that is paranoid about the state of his relationship.

[Verse 1] Have you got colour in your cheeks? Do you ever get that fear that you can't shift the tide That sticks around like summat in your teeth? Are there some aces up your sleeve? Have you no idea that you're in deep? I've dreamt about you nearly every night this week How many secrets can you keep? 'Cause there's this tune I found That makes me think of you somehow an' I play it on repeat Until I fall asleep, spillin' drinks on my settee [Pre-Chorus] (Do I wanna know?) If this feelin' flows both ways? (Sad to see you go) Was sorta hopin' that you'd stay (Baby, we both know) That the nights were mainly made For sayin' things that you can't say tomorrow day [Chorus] Crawlin' back to you Ever thought of callin' when You've had a few? 'Cause I always do Maybe I'm too Busy bein' yours To fall for somebody new Now, I've thought it through Crawlin' back to you [Verse 2] So have you got the guts? Been wonderin' if your heart's still open And if so, I wanna know what time it shuts Simmer down an' pucker up, I'm sorry to interrupt It's just I'm constantly on the cusp of tryin' to kiss you But I don't know if you feel the same as I do But we could be together if you wanted to [Pre-Chorus] (Do I wanna know?) If this feelin' flows both ways? (Sad to see you go) Was sorta hopin' that you'd stay (Baby, we both know) That the nights were mainly made For sayin' things that you can't say tomorrow day [Chorus] Crawlin' back to you (Crawlin' back to you) Ever thought of callin' when You've had a few? (Had a few) 'Cause I always do ('Cause I always do) Maybe I'm too (Maybe I'm too busy) Busy bein' yours (Bein' yours) To fall for somebody new Now, I've thought it through Crawlin' back to you [Outro] (Do I wanna know?) If this feelin' flows both ways? (Sad to see you go) Was sorta hopin' that you'd stay (Baby, we both know) That the nights were mainly made For sayin' things that you can't say tomorrow day (Do I wanna know?) Too busy bein' yours to fall (Sad to see you go) Ever thought of callin', darlin'? (Do I wanna know?) Do you want me crawlin' back to you?

[mettatons-fat-doughy-asscheeks]

Here you go.

*I forward the promotion offers to mettaton for him to take without question*

I'm sure they'll all be glad to have you backing their promotion campaigns...

*Ooooh wheeeeeze these are kinda interesting. Hey all the darling hfff hff fans watching! I'll put out a BUUAAARP poll with these and I sign up for the top 3 winners! Vote for what seems more interesting to ya!

*It was quite the menagerie of pretty much universally terrible choices for his public image. The mobility tech company was called WobbleWagon, near exclusively specializing in labor saving bariatric scooters. They're pretty high end of course especially when offering services like "auto stroking" and "adaptive assisting arms" in their products. It's obvious who the headset is from its Gamer Butt again. Seemed "performance comfort" gaming couches and incredibly embarrassing loungewear wasn't enough for them and they've dived into... Whatever this is? All-in-one headset could encompass so many things that it's hard to tell if it's just fancy headphones or a full VR setup. Seems like it's in the prototype phase and they're very tight lipped outside lots of marketing talk. For the stoners out there SlothSnakz doesn't need an introduction. They've been making edibles for everywhere it's been legalized and they're veeery popular if maybe ill advised for beginners due to high dosages and a taste that'll have you going back for more before it properly kicks in. The supplements are from two different seemingly competitors. RoundHealth is specialized in energy supplements, the kinda stuff covered in lightning bolts and with commercials full of sporty people doing sporty stuff. Every ingredient in their products is a trade secret funny enough. Lastly is MedFit, the all in one "supplement drink" that's supposed to provide hydration and "essential nutrients" to the body potentially better than water can. The studies that try and prove this are of course all payed for by MedFit. Totally not shady stuff right?

[thatbendyfan]

In lipstick on the mirror Are the lyrics to my obituary In iambic pentameter, followed parameter Crossing my eyes, dot my T's I was delivered holding scissors I live deliberately, I'm a quitter And a winner anyway Cause I never agreed to participate in this game Won't follow my dreams No, they've all got me waking up screaming I can let them go from me After all there is no "I" in team

And I'd rather be normal. Yes, so normal I suggest that we keep this informal Cause a normal human being wouldn't need To pretend to be normal to be normal Well I guess that's the least that I owe ya To be normal in a way I couldn't be C'mon, c'mon, and love me normally

If I could live in third person Well I don't think life would be much worse than it is In the current tense, presently This sentence ending with question marks or dot dot dot Is it courageous or escapist To leave the quarantine when you're contagious It may just be a cold And besides I don't wanna get old I drank myself to death to be the afterlife of the party When the afterparty came, I was rolling in my grave

And I'd rather be normal. Yes, so normal I suggest that we keep this informal Cause a normal human being wouldn't need To pretend to be normal to be normal Well I guess that's the least that I owe ya To be normal in a way I couldn't be C'mon, c'mon, and love me normally

Now this is the part of the song where I like to talk to my audience I like to tell 'em there's something I want from you hep cats tonight I want you to look to your left, look to your right Your 12 o'clock, three o'clock, six o'clock, nine o'clock, rock around the clock tonight And I want you to find those points of no return, those singularities Those burning rings of fire in the beautiful pupils of the beautiful eyes of the beautiful Boy, girl, neither, both, or in-between that you brought with you tonight And I want you to tell 'em how you really feel I want you to tell 'em that you love the way they so seamlessly, like a dreamfully So beautifully, oh so dutifully Jam that square peg in the round hole in their heart I want you to tell 'em that you love the way That they don't stick out like sore middle fingers That they crawl their way up the side of the bell curve Stick their flag in the peak, and slide their way back down I want you to tell them that you love the way that they're not maladaptive Not malcontent, not malignant or maleficent, but rather that you love them Exactly the way that everybody else is

I was nothing before so I couldn't have asked to be born I'll be nothing again, so what am I between now and then Is there nothing to fear? Cause shit's getting weird So to God who made this man, you better have one hell of a plan

I'd rather be normal. Yes, so normal I suggest that we keep this informal Cause a normal human being wouldn't need. No To pretend to be normal to be normal Well I guess that's the least that I owe ya To be normal in a way I could never be C'mon, c'mon, yeah, I said c'mon, yeah C'mon, c'mon, yeah, I said c'mon, yeah C'mon, c'mon, and love me normally

i was about to go to sleep. thanks crisis averted

[wormsinsdirt]

In lipstick on the mirror

Are the lyrics to my obituary

In iambic pentameter, followed parameter

Crossing my eyes, dot my T's

I was delivered holding scissors

I live deliberately, I'm a quitter

And a winner anyway

Cause I never agreed to participate in this game

Won't follow my dreams

No, they've all got me waking up screaming

I can let them go from me

After all there is no "I" in team

And I'd rather be normal. Yes, so normal

I suggest that we keep this informal

Cause a normal human being wouldn't need

To pretend to be normal to be normal

Well I guess that's the least that I owe ya

To be normal in a way I couldn't be

C'mon, c'mon, and love me normally

If I could live in third person

Well I don't think life would be much worse than it is

In the current tense, presently

This sentence ending with question marks or dot dot dot

Is it courageous or escapist

To leave the quarantine when you're contagious

It may just be a cold

And besides I don't wanna get old

I drank myself to death to be the afterlife of the party

When the afterparty came, I was rolling in my grave

And I'd rather be normal. Yes, so normal

I suggest that we keep this informal

Cause a normal human being wouldn't need

To pretend to be normal to be normal

Well I guess that's the least that I owe ya

To be normal in a way I couldn't be

C'mon, c'mon, and love me normally

Now this is the part of the song where I like to talk to my audience

I like to tell 'em there's something I want from you hep cats tonight

I want you to look to your left, look to your right

Your 12 o'clock, three o'clock, six o'clock, nine o'clock, rock around the clock tonight

And I want you to find those points of no return, those singularities

Those burning rings of fire in the beautiful pupils of the beautiful eyes of the beautiful

Boy, girl, neither, both, or in-between that you brought with you tonight

And I want you to tell 'em how you really feel

I want you to tell 'em that you love the way they so seamlessly, like a dreamfully

So beautifully, oh so dutifully

Jam that square peg in the round hole in their heart

I want you to tell 'em that you love the way

That they don't stick out like sore middle fingers

That they crawl their way up the side of the bell curve

Stick their flag in the peak, and slide their way back down

I want you to tell them that you love the way that they're not maladaptive

Not malcontent, not malignant or maleficent, but rather that you love them

Exactly the way that everybody else is

I was nothing before so I couldn't have asked to be born

I'll be nothing again, so what am I between now and then

Is there nothing to fear? Cause shit's getting weird

So to God who made this man, you better have one hell of a plan

I'd rather be normal. Yes, so normal

I suggest that we keep this informal

Cause a normal human being wouldn't need. No

To pretend to be normal to be normal

Well I guess that's the least that I owe ya

To be normal in a way I could never be

C'mon, c'mon, yeah, I said c'mon, yeah

C'mon, c'mon, yeah, I said c'mon, yeah

C'mon, c'mon, and love me normally